#because that's what you want right. you want to improve that stat. you want people to be able to comprehend what they can understand right

[david-watts]

really interesting how some people on this site, who seemingly are the type to be smug about the fact they have no trouble with critical thinking skills too, will take their opinion on something subjective and pretend it's objective fact. what's the definition of subjective again

[merlinmarvelandother-oneshots]

Sorry, I meant to send an ask yesterday, but I got carried away 😅

So what about ut, us, uf and ht (you can ignore the last one if you want to don't worry) and how they would be with a reader that hides the fact that they're physically hurt.

Maybe they went hiking with the skellie, and they tripped and pretended that it was only a little scratch when days later they see quite a big wound that's infected.

It's a bit gross, so it's okay if you don't do it, don't worry :)

Have a good day/night and be safe

-💀

UnderTale, UnderSwap, UnderFell, and HorrorTale skellies react to a reader hiding that they're injured

you had gotten in a little tussle with a fallen branch walking home. you were completely oblivious, and tripped right over it. it hurt to walk on, and you soon noticed it swelling. it wasn't... sprained, right? nah, of course not! you brushed it off, thinking that it would be just fine in a day or two.

but until then, you might want to put some ice on that.

and so you did. for three days, with no sign of improvement. you tried keeping it a secret, but then your s/o came home while you were putting ice on it, right on the couch beside the door, and...

UnderTale:

Sans:

-he walks into the house, immediately heading for the couch.

-"hey, y/n, i'm ho- you alright? what happened to you?"

-"oh! sans, hi, i didn't expect you home so early!" you wave frantically to draw his eyes away from your ankle.

-"yeah... work was slow, so i came home. whats going on? you're acting weird."

-"pshh, don't be silly, nothing's wrong! absolutely nothing!"

-he sighs.

-"my whole shtick back in the underground was that i can see peoples stats. your HPs lowered, you're acting really awkward about your leg, and you're trying to hide an ice pack from me. i know, i saw it when i walked in. so, im gonna ask you again. whats going on?"

-you sighed. he caught you, he always did.

-"i dont know what's up. I tripped a few days ago and my ankle just started swelling. I'm gonna give it a few more days before I see a doctor, just to see if it heals on its own."

-"alright then," really? that's it? not going to insist you see someone? well, that's great for you! "I'm going to grillby's. wanna come?"

-you nodded your head.

-"cmon, let's take a shortcut."

-he took you to the fucking ER.

Papyrus:

-you look up after hearing the door open and you heard a crash.

-he had gone grocery shopping, apparently, because his bags were sprawled on either side of him on the floor.

-his jaw was only half hinged, that's how bad you scared him.

-as in it dropped. almost fully.

-he suddenly runs to your side (re-hinging his jaw on the way) and kneels by your side.

-"HUMAN, what ever is the matter? is it serious? does it hurt? will it need stitches? should i take you to-"

-"Paps! i'm okay. i think it's just sprained, i'll be alright," you tries to reassure him.

-"SPRAINED? oh, HEAVENS no, i must take you to the doctor right away!"

-you sigh. "Papyrus, it isn't that big of a deal. i'm sure it'll be alright in a few days."

-"absolutely not! what if it's worse than you think? it could kill you!"

-he really thought a sprained ankle could kill you? he may be clueless about human injuries, but at least he cares!

-you don't have too much time to reply before he picks you up, puts you in the car, buckles you up (because heaven forbid something ELSE happen to you, ESPECIALLY under his watch) and brings you to the ER.

UnderFell:

Sans:

-he literally did not notice.

-he grumbles a quiet, "hey," before trotting upstairs into his room.

-it isn't until several days later when the pain has worsened and you cannot walk on it that he asks what the fuck is going on.

-you explained that you had tripped a few days ago, and it got swollen, and you thought that it would just go away, but it's been getting worse and worse since it happened.

-"fuckin' idiot," he groaned. "i'm dating a goddamn moron! alright, get in the car. i'm takin' you to a hospital."

-he's groaning the entire way.

Papyrus:

-as soon as he lays eyes on you, he sighs.

-"what did you do this time?"

-what the hell did he mean, 'this time'? he CANNOT be holding you accountable for that one time you got a concussion! that was HIS fault!

-"hey! you BETTER not be talking about-"

-"about the concussion," he cut you off. "yes, yes, i'm aware, you believe that incident to be my doing. however, i can GUARANTEE that this is not! now, tell me what happened. i expect a full explanation."

-you rolled you eyes and told him, feeling a little pissed off about his crossed arms and tapping foot, although you couldn't fully blame him. the whole situation WAS a little silly, now that you have to say it out loud.

-he scoffed when you finished talking. such a silly thing! why the HELL didn't you immediately see a doctor? swelling is NEVER normal!

-how did he, a skeleton monster who had gone most of his life without so much as seeing a human, know more about human anatomy than a fully grown human adult?

-and how did he, an esteemed member of the royal guard, end up in a relationship with such a fool?

-"get yourself looking decent. we are visiting the hospital to get you proper treatment."

-'looking decent', you looked fi-! no, you didn't, nevermind.

UnderSwap:

Sans:

-"hey, y/n, Alphys let out training early, so i'm back! what are you doing?"

-you scrambled to hide the ice pack and hike your pants back over your ankle. "oh, uh. . . nothing," you said sheepishly in reply, a fake grin appearing on your face.

-"oohhhh, no no no. i know that look. you're hiding something. best be honest now."

-damn him! how DARE he know you so well!

-"i think i did something to my ankle," you muttered.

-"hmm. . . let me see."

-he walked over and inspected your ankle for a few moments.

-"it looks sprained. when did this start?"

-"a few days ago. i tripped and it started swelling."

-he gave your ankle ankther quick look.

-"and why didn't you tell me?"

-"well, i thought it would go away at first. i was going to tell you, if it didn't. i was just going to wait a few days."

-"well, there's no need! i'm taking you to a doctor."

-he helped you stand and let you use him as something like a crutch, so you wouldn't have to put too much weight on your injured foot.

Papyrus:

-you look up to see him standing, eyebrows furrowed (you know what i mean sans does it in the main game) looking at you.

-"anything you want to tell me?"

-"ah, nothing. . . i'm just gonna go to a doctor if this doesn't start getting better."

-you knew the look he was giving you. he wanted to know what happened.

-"i tripped a few days ago and my ankle started swelling. nothing major. it's just a little sore."

-"mmm. i'm sure. you have five minutes, then i'm taking you to a doctor," he said as he laid on the couch beside you.

-"no, Paps, there's really no need-" you were interupted by snoring. but you knew that didn't mean you were off the hook. he would be awake in five minutes EXACTLY, whether you were ready to go or not.

HorrorTale:

Sans:

-he kinda just stands there for a few moments after he sees you with the ice pack.

-ice pack means something's wrong, because he doesn't see food around, but his skull injury makes figuring anything else out difficult.

-ice pack. . . on your ankle. . .

-it doesn't matter what's wrong. he just knows something is. so, he comforts you! in the only way he knows how!

-which is a BONE-CRUSHING hug.

-and because you're sitting, and he's standing over you, leaning down to hug you, it's a very awkward angle. leading to a lot of bones jabbing into uncomfortable places.

-you know you can't really do anything to get him off of you, so you just wait it out.

-"i'm alright, Sans. it isn't anything major. i'm about to go to a doctor!"

-he was going to tell you to anyway. you just got that part out of the way.

-his time in the underground under Undyne's rule made him very paranoid about the health of those he loves, so no matter how big the injury, you MUST see a doctor.

-it's not up for debate.

-he drives you because he doesn't want you to have to put any more strain on your ankle.

-(should he even have a drivers license? questionable...)

Papyrus:

-he has a puzzled look on his face.

-that. . . he suspected that wasn't a good sign.

-"y/n. . . i don't suppose you want to tell me what is going on?"

-"oh," you nervously laughed. "no biggie. just tripped a few days ago, it kinds hurts. if it doesn't feel better tomorrow i'm seeing a doctor."

-"hmm. i shall hold you to that."

-you laughed. you bet he would.

-spoiler alert, he did.

(a/n: sorry if this is totally inaccurate to having a sprained ankle, it just seemed like a good scenario, and i was too in the writing groove ((once i actually started)) to do much research)

[mikkeneko]

Have been pondering, following the latest round of "But why don't authors LIKE it when we leave unsolicited concrit on their stuff? :|a Don't they want to IMPROVE?" discourse:

How do fan authors improve? Because it's not, by and large, through concrit. Some authors have never gotten any kind of concrit, and still improve. I've gotten some in the past, and it definitely was not helpful towards improving my growth as an author. Some authors never have a beta, and yet they still improve.

So. If not through a workshop devoted to the process, or a classroom style series of lectures, or a dedicated editor, how do authors improve over time?

I would say, based on my 20+ years of experience and observation, that improvement as a writer comes in three ways: Practice shaped by self-observation, practice shaped by non-critical feedback as positive reinforcement, and observation of other authors.

Fandom has always been a space where people of different ages and skill levels interact. How it works, generally, is that a new author comes into the scene and presents their work. Readers -- some of whom are authors themselves -- will leave feedback praising the parts they like. Writers will then adjust their style on the next piece geared towards eliciting more of the things that readers said they like. However, in a vacuum, they won't necessarily know what to adjust towards, or what new things to try that they aren't already trying.

But at the same time, these young authors are usually (though not always) reading works by more experienced authors in the fandom. They can see, based on popularity stats and feedback left by others, what people like. If they want more of that attention themselves -- or, just generally, if they want to be part of the community -- they will adjust their works to incorporate more of the parts they perceive as successful with the audience.

They will also -- the more they read, and the more they write -- come to internalize an understanding (often, not even a conscious understanding) of the moving parts that go into a story, of what makes the work work. How to pace a scene, a chapter, or a longer work. How the characters talk, and how different characters talk in ways that distinguish their voices. What sort of language works well to describe an action scene, and what is confusing and uncertain. What words are sexy and what words will jar you right out of the mood. They will pick up these tools by observation, and hone them through practice.

The down side of this, of course, is that sometimes the authors they are observing and imitating may have... less than ideal writing habits themselves. Certain tropes, flanderization, headcanons divorced from the original canon, or various other things can become endemic in a fandom due to this -- but also much simpler and more straightforward writing quirks. (The infamous oh is an example of these.) Sometimes things that I won't necessarily say are bad, I will just observe that they are not correct.

And this is how you got an entire generation of fanfic writers using strong endings on verbs that, in modern English, take the weak ending.

[evanbuckleyrecs]

Buddie AUs over 20k

To catch up on recommending fics in my bookmarks, I'll also try to make some lists instead of posting one fic per post. Though some fics might also still get their own posts even while added in a list.

To start, here are some finished Buddie AUs with more than 20k words

(I made this list in March so it doesn't have any newer fics. Soon I want to spend a day dedicated to catching up to new fics and adding posts to my queue here)

what if you're someone I just want around by ReallySmartLadyMarieCurie

20k, Rated T

"Eddie pauses in his typing, glancing at Buck and trying to figure him out. He seems so eager to help and to please, so willing to take some of the burden in order to make others happy. It’s the sort of presence that Eddie’s been craving in his life. One that he’s missed since Shannon’s fatal accident. And he’s incredibly handsome. He’s got conventional good looks and a beautiful smile, but that pink little splotch above his eye, which Eddie guesses is a birthmark, is really what brings it home."

Or, Eddie Diaz is a successful boxer who's been making a big name for himself in recent years. Buck is a fan, but he certainly never expected to end up at Eddie's house after the man calls 9-1-1 when his son gets sick.

I love the way you spoil me, baby by rosebuddiekin

33,8K, rated E

“I, uh, I was actually at that coffee shop to meet with someone else. You see, for the past few years, I’ve been a sugar daddy on a site that connects people looking for similar things. I was supposed to meet with a prospective baby that day, but then I saw you. And I felt drawn to you, so I messaged the guy I was supposed to be seeing and told him I had to cancel. I just, I thought you should know. That I should be upfront about it from the start.”

Eddie’s fork drops to his plate, making a small clatter. He can feel that his mouth is agape. He’s very glad he hadn’t taken another bite or sip of anything while Buck spoke. Because what the actual fuck? Buck… is a sugar daddy.

OR: Buck is a sugar daddy who wants to spoil Eddie rotten and take care of everything for him. Eddie has never had that sort of relationship but is willing to give it a try. There is plenty of adventure along the way.

Sunny skies & summer high by prettyboybuckley

Sequel to a one shot, 43,8K, rated E


"Well, I kind of want to kiss you right now but that's usually something that happens at the end of a first date, right?" Buck asks, doing a weird movement with his eyebrows in an attempt to be funny.

Eddie chuckles, wrinkling his nose a little.

"I guess, yeah," he mutters. "Think we're doing this a little backward already anyway, so are there any rules to follow?"

He's got a point there, and even then Buck has never really been the kind of guy who follows rules, so he ends up leaning over the center console as he uses one hand to pull Eddie's face towards him. It's a short kiss, a simple peck hello that Eddie chases after when Buck pulls away again.

OR: Buck and Eddie sneak around behind Eddie’s family’s back, spend the summer together, smoke a lot of weed, and fall in love along the way

Kiss me before It's over (if only for a minute) by Bob_loblaws_lawblog

54,2K, Rated E

Evan Buckley is living out his childhood dream as the star hitter for the Philadelphia Phillies. He’s climbing the ranks, improving his stats with every single game – he’s unstoppable.

That is, until the Los Angeles Angels get a new pitcher seemingly out of nowhere. Known for his strong arm and tricky curve balls, Eddie Diaz is one of the few pitchers in the nation who consistently makes Buck strike out, and its infuriating. Even from the sixty feet that separate them between the batter’s box and the pitcher’s mound, the weight of Diaz’s gaze is enough to make Buck’s blood boil.

Because Buck doesn’t get nervous on game day, he never feels calmer than when he steps up to the plate with the bat in his hand – it’s where he belongs. But when he sees Eddie Diaz standing on that mound, his stomach flips and nerves spark across his skin.

Because if there is one thing Buck knows for sure, it is that he hates Eddie Diaz.

… Until he doesn’t.

Traded by princessfbi

23,7K, rated M

Really, it was Lena’s fault. She’d been the one to demand a video when Eddie had finally caved and sent an SOS to the group chat asking if anyone was willing to trade.

“Is anyone interested in trading jerseys with me? Preferably for a smaller size,” Eddie had said because knowing his coworkers, one of them would’ve been a smart ass and gave him an even bigger size. “I ordered an XL because I’m usually a XL but… the way it fits makes me look like I’m fucking one of the players.”

Eddie wasn't trying to go viral. He just wanted to trade his jersey. But then something called Booktok got involved.

Bartender!Eddie Diaz x Hockey Player!Evan Buckley

Snowed Inn by brewrosemilk

31,1K, rated M

Rivaling for a promotion, journalists Evan Buckley and Eddie Diaz get sent to a small town where they are each to write a piece on a once illustrious inn and its rich history. For two talented and overconfident authors, it sounds like an easy assignment - but in between a violent snowstorm, blocked roads, heated stares, and a struggling inn, Buck and Eddie may just have to abandon their rivalry and accept each other as partners.

Don't play games (come my way) by letmetellyouaboutmyfeels

43,1K, Rated E

Buck hates Eddie Diaz.

Ever since his publishing company and Eddie's merged, the man has been nothing but a pain in Buck's ass. The way he nitpicks all of Buck's company emails, the way he spends half his day bickering with Buck, the way he makes Buck's stomach flip and the way he's started haunting Buck's dreams... yeah, it's one hundred percent hate. Definitely. Buck's sure of it.

Because what the hell else could it be?

Falling slowly; sing your melody (I'll sing it loud) by princessfbi

55,3K, Rated E

Buck didn’t like him at first.

Eddie Diaz was all hard lines and strict rules with a bone structure that could cut through glass and scared away his fans. Which... if you asked Bobby, was the point but still!

He also yelled at Buck which was fine. It’s not like it hurt his feelings.

It didn’t.

It didn’t, Maddie!

It also definitely didn’t turn Buck on either. Nope.

Stop it, Maddie!

After a traumatizing home invasion, Bobby Nash decides to hire a bodyguard for his lead singer.

Musician!Buck Bodyguard!Eddie

More fics to be recommended soon!

[the-cat-and-the-birdie]

Imagine going to the

Gym or Training Rooms with Miguel

And like not even in a cutesy couple way - just imagine having Miguel as a personal trainer

Or having him as your Society mentor

He's probably so nice and encouraging I'll fight you on this

He shows up everytime with two tumblers of pre-work out smoothies he made himself

Sometimes they're good and sometimes they're GNARLY but he tries to get you to drink it all everytime, so you don't get too exhausted

He is MILITANT about water intake I'm not kidding

Will stand next to you hands on hips, watching as you drink half a bottle of water because you said you didn't drink any and he will NOT STAND FOR IT

As you two drink and prep for the gym he always asks your goals, what you want to do or get better at

Even if it's just self-love - Miguel COMPLETELY accepts that. Cause you're still showing up for yourself

And he always makes sure to ask your limits, what you feel like you can and can't take or what you don't like

HE'S SO ENCOURAGING

Always telling you when you're doing better or improved - he remembers your records or stats and every time you do better, he notices

And always gives a thumbs up

And he's always looking out for you

Miguel's the type to watch you and let you do your thing

Keeping his eye out for you and letting you get in your zone

In training he's always ready to tell you 'That was better' or 'You're getting faster/stronger'

Because he wants you to leave feeling confident and proud of yourself

He's ALL ABOUT Body Kindness

Sometimes he may be like 'Stop - you're going to hurt yourself. 🤨😠'

But he always helps you adjust after, coming up behind you to show you how to do it properly

Even then though he never judges you for your skill or your ability or body

But he will judge the way you talk to yourself

Miguel WOULD NOT let you talk bad about your body or yourself - cause he knows it only takes you away from your goals

If you start to get upset or insult your body, he'll get you to pause what your doing and take a break

He'll stop two and sit with you, try to explain that it's not your body's fault

Sometimes he'll even ask you to apologize to your body

Because you and your body are doing it's best

After training he'll ask 'Do you think you did good?'

Because he wants you to verbally compliment yourself after all your hard work

He knows he's,... HUGE

But he tries not to be intimidating (unless need be), and he doesn't want people to compare themselves to him

He always tells you it's okay that he can lift more, that doesn't mean he's physically perfect.

He's trying to work on things too (like getting his flexibility up)

He's a GREAT spotter when it comes to weights

His voice is so even and calming, and it never sounds like he's pushing you too far or barking orders

He reminds you to breathe while excerising, and if he ask permission, sometimes he'll put his hand on the small of your back to remind you of your posture

He's also GREAT at warding off creeps. If you're off doing your own thing and come weirdo comes over to you

Suddenly they're standing in the eclipse of Miguel's shadow because he's RIGHT BEHIND THEM

He's like 'THEY'RE BUSY.' and that's enough for them to take off lol

And if you're into physical fitness that he doesn't do often, he'll do ANYTHING to back you

Gymnastics, Swimming, Pole, Martial Arts - you name it. He'll be there, reminding you to keep your focus, drink water, and trust yourself

You may even be able to pull him into different sports yourself - like rock climbing or Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu (which he LOVES)

Sparring with Miguel is SO SO SO FUN

He's never trying to hurt you - that's not the point

He wants you to get better, and for you to learn about your fighting style

He'll run you through different fights, pause and then look at you

And ask something like 'What move would you do next?' or 'You have me here - how do you take me down?'

So you can think more about your movements and skills

And he always makes sure to ask 'How do you feel?' after - no matter what you're doing

He just wants to help you feel good and reach your goals

Miguel really finds the gym relaxing as hell he probably LOVES the gym

So he'd want to make it the most welcoming/accessible place

If you're new, he's always down to answer questions - or if you're really unsure, he'll even help you come up with a regimine

Or get you started on a machine that's not too daunting

If you're differently abled, then definitely come up him. He'll help you figure something out, no matter what it is

Even asking Lyla what's the best way to go about it that helps you reach your goals and listen to your body

Not having all the powers of usual Spider-people, Miguel really had to learn his body and what areas he needed to grow in/adapt

So he really likes helping other people do that too

He's met so many Spider-people, he knows all bodies, regardless of ability or build, have things they're good at

And everybody deserves to feel comfortable and understanding in their body regardless of what they've been through

He ends every workout with you by giving you a Gatorade from his bag and a pat on the back

But if he offers you the ice bath DON'T TAKE IT IT'S A TRAP

He means well but IT'S A TRAP

Miguel is OBSESSED with Ice Baths the man's an unfeeling maniac sitting in a bathtub full of crushed ice and reading a book like it's normal

I want to go to the gym with Miguel BADLY I'm SO WHIPPED for this man

[cerastes]

hey, i'm planning to get armored core 6 despite never playing any of those games before and since you seem pretty knowledgeable about them i was wondering if you have any tips for someone totally new to the series?

Sorry for the super late answer!

The first thing I can tell you about Armored Core is that you have to get comfy because half of the game is high speed intense high octane combat, and the other half is accounting. Brother, I know how much you want to go back to the part where rifles go bang and swords go swoosh and you have enough Gs on your body that you could passably cosplay a plate of mashed of potatoes, but you gotta do the Excel spreadsheet part, too.

It's really not as bad as it seems, and once it clicks, you know exactly what to look for. But if you want to get all the juice out of the tenga, you have to sit down and take a deep gander at how the systems click. Once you do, trust me on this one, an endless horizon of options will stretch before you because that's when you'll know exactly how to tailor your big death machine to your exact specifications and playstyle. It's deep, but also deeply rewarding!

Next up, something universally useful in Armored Core: Turning Speed. If you can mod, upgrade, or otherwise improve your "Turning Speed" (or equivalent) stat, crank that up as often as you can. It's always a powerful tool, it's always very useful, it's never superfluous. This ties in to the next point:

Your strongest weapon is your camera. When fighting other ACs, player controlled or otherwise, your strongest tool, throughout the games, has been to keep your opponent in your camera, and to stay out of your opponent's camera. Movement is huge in Armored Core, you need to move so as to 1) keep your enemy in your sights, 2) stay out of your enemy's sights, and 3) line up shots. We call this "lining up a vector" or "keeping the enemy in a vector". What this means is that you want to set up your enemy in such a way that they are moving in a direct vector relative to you -- directly towards you or away from you -- so that your shot with stronger, single shot weaponry will land and deal significant damage. You set up this vector while also trying to not be 'caught' in one yourself, and as you may think, this is hard, because if they are in your vector, you are in most situations also in theirs. So, the solution? Be outside of their camera while they are in yours. Can't shoot what they aren't aiming at, right? This is a lot to take in, I know, but you don't have to commit all of this to execution off rip, just keep it in mind, develop your playstyle and learn naturally with this in the back of your head until it clicks and you start being able to see, through your own playstyle, how it is you'll do that.

One final thing I want to recommend is that you don't fall for the allure of The Big Damage Number without considering other factors. Especially when learning, you want to make a balanced build: Have your single shot strong weapons, like a grenade launcher or sniper rifle, paired with a weaker but easier to land weapon, like assault rifles or machine guns, and compliment this further with some sort of auxiliary tool or weapon, like flares that give you leeway, or missiles that can put further pressure on your enemy. In general, when starting out their Armored Core journey, I recommend to people the following loadout: Grenade launcher, assault rifle, laser sword, missile launcher. This is a well rounded toolkit that'll keep you effective at most ranges, and more importantly, will reveal to you, your own preferences. Once you become a super Newtype ace pilot fuckhouse, you'll doubtlessly make your own deathkaiser machine with quadruple railguns or missileboats or pure melee builds, but to get to that point where you know exactly what you want to do, a balanced build helps in letting you learn where your heart leans, what kind of movement-to-bulk ratio works best for you, which weapons are your favorite, etc.

[shinystarfishmoon]

letter to you by your heigher self

Hi everyone welcome back to my new pac💗

I initially thought of making this about your grey side but thought my reading lately were getting too much into improving yourself and grey side.. I mean what about self love?so here We are ☺️

Also I am posting this pac Just 2 days before my College stats.. so it will take a while for other pac to come 😶‍🌫️

You can choose from the above animation of Jennie left to right . Take deep breaths and choose the plie.. ✨✨

if you like this reading follow and reblog for more such reading 💗

Non of this animation are mine . I found them on printrest

Plie 1

Welcome to your reading plie no 1 🐥

Cards: queen of coins, the fool, 5 of cups, 8of wands ,king of Wands , the world ,4 of cups

Letter 💌

Hi sweetheart

I am your heigher self talking to you,.. I have so much to say but will start with compliments that I want to give you ... My dear your are such a good leader, it's admirable how you are really good at not only seeing how things benefits you but also considering about how they can benefit others . Your Practical approach towards the goals you have for future is admirable. But you need to understand that working is not only way that you are gonna grow sometimes you need to be having fun and enjoying your life because we may think that is not the last time that we are going to have fun or we there will be another times that we could have fun but I think that you need to start to live in the present I love that your working for your future but honey you need need to go out and need to have fun you need to be like a fool who loves life and is adventurous don't let don't play let the curiosity of a child that you have inside your heart die. You have came so far and when you look behind you will see that you have given given up so much for the things and the goals that you have for yourself at the end of the day you are making it work out but you need to know that balance is the key for healthy life and you may sometimes feel trapped because of the the overload of the work that you are doing I know you love work and you are practical about it but you need to go out and have fun touch some grass, and not always be on the laptop working . Do not feel that you are onworthy of all the things are the blessings coming your way because you have done the work you are doing the work and you are putting the effort that it needs to manifest your dreams and they are going to come true.. you need to exercise or at least to yoga or stretch your body wake up early because the bad habits of staying up all night and and not doing exercise are not good for yourself in your health so drop that bad habits girlll . Love yourself have self-care days . 💌💗

Messages: You are always loved and supported

Thats all that I have for you plie 1💗

Welcome to plie 2😺

Cards: judgment, chalices, the express, the hanged man (in reversed) 2 of coins king of wands, strength

Letters 💌

Hello there.. you have come so far facing all the hurdles on your way and you are still afraid what are you afraid about? The thing in the past happened with you they were not something small you went through that and you still fine . What makes you think that the obstacles in future will terrify you or you are not going to make through them ? You need to love yourself to find someone who truly loves you it's not only about romantic relationships that you will be having in the future but it's also about the friendship that you are going to make , if you are not loving yourself enough you are not secure enough in yourself that will project in you manifesting people who are insecure and in you manifesting the same experience that you did in the past. You need to heal yourself and fill up your own Cup before you even start to look for love or friendship in others you need to be your friend and your lover first to find that in another people .Its not just about being loved but it's also about being able to love yourself. You need to be kind to yourself you need to say good things about yourself you need to say the things that you want to hear from your love from your friends why do you need other people to compliment you you can compliment yourself it's not crazy many people do compliment themselves and its not crazy you are not crazy!!. You are scared of changes but you still know that changes are important for you you know that changes are important for you and your still afraid of them your afraid of change is because you don't know what it brings with them you don't you are afraid of the unknown you don't have to be afraid of the changes girl it can be very beautiful why always think about the worst . focus on the good things that can happen with changes. You need to balance your life you need to find balance between being extra giving and saving it for yourself saving doesn't mean that you are being greedy doesn't mean that you are selfish no. Think about yourself before you think about others it's fine it's not selfish you this is you just balancing your life because you are a person who will think about others before you think about yourself and I really want you to think about yourself first . I want you to put yourself first and . All this will require a lot of strength and courage and I know that you have that in yourself I know you can do this I know you have that courage and strength to handle changes . Change is not always bad.

Messages

You are worthy or being loved, love yourself first, balance,change is good,

Thats all I have for you plie 2

Hello plie 3

Cards: king of swords, queen of swords,9 of cups, Queen of wands, the emperor, 4 of swords , Queen of cups

Hi There ...so much I want to say to you right now lets get to the most imp thing first.. Stop letting people walk all over you !!!! Stand up for yoursel . if people think that it is rude of you to stand up for yourself let them think that you are rude but you need to stand up for yourself and not let people that are rude that are hurting you emotionally get away with that you need to be bluntly honest and if it's hurting someone's feelings that is none of your business they should not be rude to you when you are being so kind to them speak for yourself . You have work so hard and achieved many of you goals and you should be celebrating do not let people who are not kind to you ruin your celebrations because you have works so hard for all that you have achieved do not let them walk all over you because you deserve to be appreciated and you deserve to be successful. Successful Peoples speak up for themselves stand for themselves and do not take anybody is crap . You are really creative person who has lot of ideas and lot of things that they want to do in their life but for you to even start something you need to stand up for yourself you need to speak for yourself because without that you cannot even interact with people. In future you are going to be at many leadership roles and that's why you need this quality to make your life easier it's always nights to be a little bit rude when you are bluntly honest then to lie and be nice. We get aware of the things and the people around p around you because not all people are nice summer bluntly manipulative and not nice rude you need to have the ability to see through people's intention. And the last thing that I want to tell you is that you are doing so much and its working for you attend of they everything will be worth it but you also need to rest yourself heel yourself and do some kinds of like activities that help you dress or therapy to you it can be anything just get back into your hobbies rest for a while rest is very important. ✨💌

Messages:

Speak up.! Be honest

That's all that I have for you plie 3 💗

Thank you so much for reading 🐥🐥

[drippingmoon]

Merry new year to everyone, again! 🥳💞🥂

I know it wasn’t an event this year, but writing a yearly wrap-up is really therapeutic, you know? So I decided to continue the tradition, and if anyone wants to join me, absolutely view this as an open invitation^^ Introduction is over, and now let’s see what 2023 looked like:

(spoilers: I adored it. I'm also probably going to make this my fixed post, in case anyone ever wants to catch up with me. And also because my second baby, AoS, is growing, and it doesn't have an intro, but I can't leave it out.)

Stats

Aquiver, Aglow: 181k (draft 4) + 195k (draft 5) + hmm, draft 6 is an outlier, because I didn’t rewrite from scratch, so I’m unsure of the written word count. I didn’t change much from draft 5, so I’d say an extra 15-20k. Total word count: 376k+

Remains of a Night: 120k 

Aberration of Sunlight: 134k

This was definitely my most productive year to date. And I got so hungry: the more I wrote, the more I just wanted to keep writing, and honestly? I’m proudest of myself for literally carving writing time whenever I got a spot into my schedule. Mostly it was from 8pm-11pm, but I had a mad run where my only free window was from 1am till I literally felt I was dying… I’ll talk about that separately🤣🤣👌

Though, I'm seriously understating it.

Like a lot of other people, I would have all these hours when I was younger when I didn't have anything to do, yet I'd still find some excuse not to write. "I'm waiting for the right time." "I'm anxious I'm not going to get it right." "Tomorrow! Tomorrow I can start right from the morning, and I'll have more time to write, yeah?" or "I'm too tired now, it's late..." and so the snowball rolled down and downhill and I found every reason under the sun not to write, now that I think about it. Sigh. So much time wasted. But I can't regret it either, because I needed those baby steps at that time.

And now! Now I do what I thought I'd never learn to: I prioritize, and I actually organize my daily stuff so it's not so impossible anymore to have a little bit of writing time. I don't take it for granted either. It feels like such character growth for me, I'm immensely proud of it.

And for the record? This year was a huge improvement over yesteryear mentally, too. It turns out, what I needed to get over my word count anxiety… was to be faced with people who literally didn’t give a fuck about it, and just cared about the story. One of the most unexpected things beta stage managed to do to me… was to quench all my anxieties. It’s as simple as that. I read and enjoy very long books. People also do that. So, I’m very happy to say I’m no longer in a tizzy about ‘quiv. It might kill my chances for trad publishing, it might not. I’ll be happy come what may.

Because it’s so simple how working on ‘quiv or thinking about it makes me joyous, and now I can just enjoy that freely. I will miss writing this story so much. I really will. But at least I’ll have it forever to reread, and I hope this thought brings comfort to everyone who also has problems letting go, like it does to me.

Let’s break it down a little, shall we?🤩

Aquiver, Aglow◇◇◇

My little star of the hour. How fond I am of it.

Like you could glean from above, ‘quiv went through three drafts this year. More specifically: in the first part of the year, practically almost as soon as February arrived. I knew it was getting closer to the final version, and gave me the push to finish all three back to back. I couldn’t justify anymore the bazillion AUs I do with rewrites (basically, WHAT IFs from events, WHAT IF it went this different way, WHAT IF Tyrone actually said this here… and so on and so forth. I wanted to test out as many pathways as possible, and did I exhaust every one of them in existence? Definitely not. I don’t think that can happen, you just keep getting new ideas. On and on. What happened, instead, is that these couple different pathways, at some point, cemented themselves as canon in my mind. I didn’t want to tease myself with alternatives anymore, and that’s when I knew they would be it. Some bits from the first draft, some from the third, some from the second. Some were even draft 6 originals!

It’s a bit of a weird process. I definitely didn’t need to reach draft 3, and meet Mezusa, because I could’ve feasibly made it work with just Yles in the story. It still would’ve made sense, though in a different way. But if I hadn’t… I might’ve missed one of the best characters I’ll ever probably have created, and the story (and Yles) is much stronger for her, if you ask me. 

For that matter, yes, full rewrites every single draft might take a lot of time and effort, but honestly I don’t think I’d ever change my writing process (save for the moments of frustration when I think I will lol) because of the sheer satisfaction of it. Whoever said so long never to settle on the first version, I owe you a beer and probably some curses as well lmao, but very lovingly. You shaped my writing life.

I don’t have much else to share about ‘quiv, other than it’s off with my beta readers my beloved, and maybe a tentative promise that, if anyone wants, you’ll be able to read this precious ball of hope of mine relatively soon. This story is so gentle to me. And as much as I loved to write and work on it, I dearly hope that whoever decides to give it a go, is treated just the same. That’s the only wish I have.

I also don’t know if I’ll go trad or self-published. Instincts say trad, because I fuckin’ suck at marketing (fact), and I know I’d grow resentful if I’d have to put so many hours into advertising when I know I could instead… write. I’m a writer. That’s the only thing I know how to do. Trad, however, might not be as kind on a ~200k as life’s been, so I might not have a choice. If it comes down to that… I’ll just treat it as I do everything. I don't love this story any less if I just write, publish without a fuss, hope that maybe, just maybe, a reader or two will stumble upon the story and we could talk. Maybe we can have the fun of our lives, create some genuine connection. I know that’s applies to a lot of writers. I hope we can accomplish it.

And so, I’ll finish this section of the wrap-up with a kiss to my ‘quiv, for all the warmth it’s ever brought me. It’s come so far, I know it can live distinct from me from now on. It brings me great comfort. And I look forward to the times I’ll reread it, and we can relive our best experiences together. Never thought I’d get to this point. Thank you, ‘quiv.

Remains of a Night♤♤♤

Mwhahaha! And because ‘quiv took all the pressure, this left AoS to be an extremely fun and spirited experience. Literally the chillest I’ve ever been writing. In many ways, it’s more my thing than I expected ‘quiv to be: I get to murder characters left and right, it’s more plot-heavy and banking on the tension created by a creature that horrifies the characters down to their marrow, but still the only way to defeat it is to know it better, which, uh, might have unpleasant consequences for them. It’s got chase and stealth scenes, and it always shoots me with adrenaline to think about them. In short, exactly my jam.

It’s not a new book, nope. You knew it before as Aberration of Sunlight, but from the get-go I felt it would be bigger than ‘quiv. Very fortunately for me, I had a place where to break it, and behold: there’s RoaN (book 1), and AoS (book 2). There might be a third book, which I dearly hope not because titling sucks, but it depends on the Sycamine arc. More on that in AoS.

One last thing to note, before we delve into the story (hoo-ray for earlier drafts, because I can talk more frankly about them). This is the culprit of my 1am writing adventures!!😫❤ My schedule became too packed, then NaNo came round and I couldn’t pass up the opportunity to honor how AoS began, because it was last year’s NaNo, aaand I’m happy to say I won NaNo, somehow, with 56k down before I died. At that time, I only had one section left to write (from both books), otherwise, hahahaha, yeah, it wouldn’t have flown. Still, most of draft 2 I’d written in September-October, with my fairy lights, late nights, and cups of hot cocoa, exactly like how life should be<3

Alright. We’re going through them chapter-by-chapter again, exactly because I love seeing the titles so much:

ACT 1

Cracked Visor, Scorpion Grass

I did it! I did! Twas another shower thought I managed to get down in time. Bare broken sentences, but they did the impossible, and arranged this chapter into a structure I adore to bits and won't ever change. (And 'quiv's naughty voice left me alone for once and I could write it properly!) While I don't think I'll ever be happy with a first chapter (not as a concept, but the writing — part of me will always wish that the reader just had all the information already lol), this one is in the right place.

It pays its respects to the story of the broken helmet at the foot of a spaceship, and how it reconnects Madigan with all the people who'd suffered from being tethered to the planets when they yearned to fly, but the Beast punished them cruelly for it. It makes him feel phantoms of their efforts. The tone is exactly what I needed this story to start from: melancholy and numbly hopeless, against the backdrop of the Beasts's echoed cries.

Rain Through the Universe

Unlike 'quiv, because RoaN and AoS are way more plot-heavy, it's not as easy to change things willy-nilly (whereas 'quiv was all about character bonds and dynamics). As such, it's very similar to draft 1. Because of that, I'll frankendraft next (select and combine drafts 1 and 2, rewrite to connect them) and afterwards I'll try something I've always wanted to. (Scrivener keeps hinting at it!) I'm gonna split the chapters into scenes, and focus on those individually and how I can just rewrite them and set their purpose in stone<3 I'm excited!

As for the chapter itself, gods, I love the atmosphere. Just the wreckage of a sundered ship, and Madigan’s sudden madman appearance making a lasting impression on Spica, because how could it not. They no longer answer distress calls in that age, it just means more dead bodies. In fact, they're forbidden to. Madigan instead brings him what he himself lacks: hope. And a lot of crawling around while dreading the Beast's lambent eye opening, and oh my, the moments are really flying by😈👏 extreme fun for me as the writer.

Aberration of Light

If you remember, the books follow two timelines, which will connect at some point. The first and main one is Madigan and Spica’s story. The other is Holloway’s, in the distant past of that universe, and who’s been dubbed the most selfish man in existence. That’s important, because of how the Beast came to be. But that becomes important later. For now, a weird-ass new recruit has joined the ship, and the witchy crew will very soon start making bets if she’s the Beast in human flesh, which really wouldn’t bode well for their future.

Night Falls On Their Reflection

Draft 2 became Spica’s draft. It was high time. He didn't exist in the original idea beyond chapter 2, but he refused to die with his story untold. And now he's one of the most independent thinkers I've ever written. Now he's Madigan's son (yes, even at 25), best friend, back-to-back partner all in one, and I could watch the trust and mutual respect between these two forever. To be sure: Madigan comes up with the dumbass plans, and Spica's only too happy to follow him through everything (it is good fun.)

He's repaying the incredible kindness Madigan's shown him when answering his distress call, after all.

But it goes a bit further than that, doesn't it? Madigan is used to watching over myriad people. He's the Superintendent of his planet, and while he genuinely loves people, kindness is his default. It doesn't go further than that for him. He doesn't necessarily think people need, much less desire his presence there beyond Madigan extending help, and most of the time, he's content with that. Kindness does make him happy. And it should be the same with Spica now, shouldn't it? He's kind, but he's not Spica's family, nor ever will be. Yet he immediately feels a connection with the boy, that has nothing to do with bonding over escaping-a-cosmic-disaster. And so does Spica.

This is the moment when Madigan starts feeling guilty, for stepping where he should not. But here's the beauty of Spica's character: he's nothing if not dead sure of his own feelings, and what he sees with his eyes. It's okay if Madigan keeps unexpectedly taking steps back. For very long, there'd been nobody to support Spica's beliefs. So he does the same, as when he followed his heart to go into dead space: he believes in himself and Madigan, and that their paths aren't meant to diverge. They mean too much to each other for that to ever happen.

(In short, and legend says you can still hear me screeching about these two ten thousand years later, I love these two so much, and especially the parallels between Spica going alone into outer space and loving Madigan.)

(And, okay, obviously all these developments don't happen in a single chapter, but I couldn't stop gushing🤭🥰.)

Who Puts These Tombs in Ice

Overall, I think draft 2’s Luitgart performed worse than draft 1. Mainly it's the setting I want to revert (still an icy, sempiternally dark hell, but with different ice constructions) because some of the beats are a huge improvement, and again, I gotta combine the two. Otherwise, I’m still as obsessed about the Luitgart arc as I’ve ever been, and huge thanks to it for being so strong it could function as an ending of its own, allowing me to split the book.

Gettin’ into spoilery territory, but I have to un-kill Madigan so many times it leaves me in hysterics. That was what I was supposed to fix this draft. It got worse. Considerably.

(One constant: the chapter being a love letter to Madigan, and how his first answer will always be to help the other, no matter if they deserve it or not<3 and finally, finally, he gets acknowledged for it, and the favor returned.)

ACT 2

Lemon-Dotted Days + Remnant

Two Holloway chapters! I’m actually massively pleased with how they’ve turned out. Last year, I said the main issue was that I had an outline, and that never works for me. So I did what I do best and rewrote everything from scratch, and the result is both uncanny and… unexpected.

Unexpected, because I never in my life thought Holloway’s voice would make me laugh so much. He’s supposed to be unsympathetic, but then you get his interactions with Saintlark (the new crewmate, possibly Beast) where they’re contemplating the harvest of a nebula, and he’s harshly critical of it, which gives Saintlark hope… only to go deadpan One Moment Later: if they’d used the nebula to prolong their lives instead of bolstering the war, they wouldn’t have died like clown idiots. 

And, they could’ve maybe stolen immortality from the nebula. They would've had to share it with him, of course. Or he would've murdered them to get it.

That, my guys, is his personality in a nutshell.

I have a lot of feelings on Holloway now, and most involve me huffing and slapping my forehead while groaning, but oh my gods. Was it ever so fun. And wait, wait, wait. Since I'm talking of humor (apparently a lot of comedy fit into this horror lmfao) I have to show you guys the following section🤣🤣👏:

Corpse Snow

The drifters are set howling on the ice. They share glances, five separate vehicles nodding at each other. Madigan revs up the engine, splitting the air with a jet of steam and vibration.

The last of the marines are climbing into the box. A figure flashes past Madigan’s drifter — and he leans over, teeth grinding because of his ribs, and he does his very best to grab someone by the back of their suit and pull. Workout days were never his strength, though. He only succeeds in stopping them in the frost smoke.

It’s Spica dangling from his hand, expressionless.

Lieutenant Hahn instantly seizes on the situation. He throws Madigan a long, withering look. “Whatcha doing, Boss?” he asks softly, about to unhinge his jaw again.

Madigan nudges Spica into the drifter. “Picking up your boy.”

Spica gets the hint and deposits himself into the front seat, glancing from his father to his Superintendent. He seems to give up on whatever’s going on, and makes himself cozy in the frosty spot. And Madigan, of course, pretends not to notice Hahn’s drifter sliding closer.

“And you didn’t consider I might want to have my son with me?”

Madigan looks up and sighs. “Lieutenant, dear Lieutenant,” he starts pleadingly. “Why won’t you show some leniency to a poor, wounded man?”

Hahn’s drifter stops, summoning a breeze across the icy floor that gently rocks the other vehicle. His breathing distorts the comms with static. “And what exactly is my son right now?”

“My trusty navigator,” Madigan answers easily.

“Sir’s emotional walking stick?” Spica pipes in at the same time.

They both look over. Spica’s quietly turned to the navigation, as serene as daylight, seemingly oblivious to how Madigan's expression changes, lightning-fast. He quickly hides it under the guise of a polite mask, as the marines stir and turn their attention on them. They’re snickering.

Lieutenant Hahn throws up his hands, giving up on everything.

This is also the first 30k chapter I’ve ever written. It's everything I've ever wanted to do with ice.

Heart of the Void

The end of the book. Originally, it was the ending section to Corpse Snow, but since it already got so ungodly long, I chipped off that bit and I have to say I’m very happy with how it works as an epilogue! So it ends the frosty, weary journey, and I can’t see the two books as separate yet, but here we bid goodbye to the first.

Aberration of Sunlight♧♧♧

I did the unthinkable and created a fifth arc. This might not seem like much to you, but I was screaming bloody murder you guys😭😭😭. Sigh. It’s so sigh. For so long, AoS consisted of four clear-cut acts, but it was necessary. With the introduction of Sycamine, and making it two books, it was just needed. It’s still one of the worst things I’ve ever done because I was used to four😃💔

(The chapters continue from where RoaN left off – from chapter 10, to 21.)

ACT 3

Retro Spectrum

Sycamine, oh Sycamine. Definitely the break I needed before Days in Darkness. It made for a really neat beginning. It’s calmer, focusing on the knowledge they have on the Beast. It’s also a reflection on Procyon (their main star) and the story of the two straggler dog constellations, and what they'd been running away from. I liked the direction it took. It veered away from the Beast for a bit, so the tension kept expanding in the background. And when it returns, well... maybe they shouldn't have been so eager to see it again🤭.

It suffers from the same syndrome as draft 1’s first chapter… it’s there in the vicinity of the idea, but too much to the left. Not bad for a first attempt. The setting annoys me – I really don't enjoy writing cities, and AoS didn't change that. So, for our next try, I was thinking... maybe we don't need to be on the planet, but up close and veeery personal with it. It's a secret❤.

And, oh gods. I put a moustache-twirling villain in this. And then I couldn’t stop myself from naming some sucker Sweetman Calories. I don’t know what happened to me during those days, but I’m crying🤣🤣🤣.

Toast to the Light

Holloway and Saintlark’s story is slowly coming to an end. Unexpectedly bleaker than draft 1, yet it feels much more sincere. Holloway has a way of saying everything Saintlark needs to hear. No surprise. They did that to themselves.

Dissonant Recognition

Ahhhh, the Madigan-is-slowly-losing-his-grip-on-reality chapter, or maybe he should really stop staring into the suns. One of my favorites<3 Also because it features Moren (!!!) who has a blast staying in the grey morality area, because she doesn’t know if her actions could ever matter, or if she could change anything. Does she just exist? Is she a player or just pawn? Who knows. Besides that, she gets along great with Spica. They form such a teasing duo, the level of mutual respect they felt for each other on sight was a delight to write. My favorite ally of theirs, even if her destiny lies elsewhere.

Night Beneath the Elevator

Best title hands down, dethroning Solgesis. I’m going batshit crazy about the visuals, it's exactly my thing. This half-light slanted over an elevator waiting in a rundown basement to be boarded. And there's something underneath it, and always has been. Something insidiously creeping up and waving its tendril fingers at you as you're just waiting for the fucking thing to ascend. Immaculate, guys, I'm telling you, and I'm cursing my hands because I can't make a wallpaper of this. I want to eat that atmosphere.

Time-sensitive missions, y'all.

And why the heck did nobody inform me I was going to add Command as an actual character and have them talk with Madigan?! That entire convo, made up entirely on the spot but somehow with a direction, made me realize what an idiot I’d been for not doing it sooner. They mean so much to Madigan, after all.

(And Mariya. So much Mariya in these chapters.)

ACT 4

Loop System

Like Who Puts These Tombs in Ice, draft 1 might’ve done it better. Not Spica and Madigan, though, because of the sheer development Spica’s been through and the dynamic he’s managed to form with the crew. It's different from Madigan’s, but similar enough that it’s got Hahn commenting lightly: [Spica’s] picked up quite a few habits from Madigan, hasn’t he? Almost as if they’ve gotten very very close, huh? How about Madigan tell him more?

(I adore writing Hahn.)

Outreach

Another Holloway chapter. Doesn’t have the punch of the kids subplot from draft 1, but this just makes it worse for Saintlark personally, because, this time, the consequences are on her.

Days in Darkness

I knew the moment I first got the idea this would be my favorite chapter. Well, it finally happened in draft 2: when the entire crew is here, this time, and ready for the final countdown, to relive the experience of being trapped in a ship that's disintegrating. No more heroes left behind. I'd been so tired writing this chapter in draft 1, but this time around it was incredible. Everything went up sharply from here, both in terms of events and how on fire I was.

(Maybe less than the gorgon, but I was.)

ACT 5

Echo Terminal

The first of the two log chapters.

I've never written smoother, more visual chapters than in this period. Days in Darkness changed me so much, I was writing day and night by this point and couldn't get enough. Well, I hit my limit in the second half of the very last chapter, but I am beyond satisfied. Even the Beast's metamorphosis took me by storm, because I'd been wondering what the final verbs, the final images, the final design for it was going to be. I didn't expect it to come to me this early, and with such thrill. Those were my very best days of the year, and I toast to them.

(And I knew it was going to be fantastic when Halo's Warthog Run OST started blaring in my head, with as much adrenaline.)

Where, Now? + Solgesis

My beloved. The second and last of the two log chapters, but it’s Noelle Saintlark’s log.

Holloway’s timeline ends here. Or maybe it just gets carried into the future. I thought I’d want to rewrite his parts again, make the plot just a tiny bit more psychedelic and nonsensical because it’s so close to the Beast… but Solgesis put all my fears to rest. Even the formatting and layout is a bit of that special thing I’ve always wanted to try, and it really changes the perspective of the previous chapters. There's a new confession that stands at the heart of Holloway's stories.

Honestly, the only thing that needs urgent working on is the anger at the end of the chapter.

Anger is so hard for me to write sometimes. Not because I don’t connect with it, but because I feel self-conscious writing it. The wildest I felt it was when I tackled 'quiv's chapter 3 and Imera's Turning speech, both in quick succession (before I'd even written draft 1. I'd been taking notes.) Since then... I just thing back to how keenly I'd felt that anger, and I kind of intimidate myself out of it. Kind of like a natural resistence, I quench it from myself. Which is actually hilarious when you think about it. It’s like I’m going I BANISH THEE FROM MY BRAIN because generally, as a person, I dislike feeling and operating on anger. But no worries. I’m going to find a way around it.

Watch me😎.

What Goes Around…

(Now it’s the time for me to start crying some rivers, and, alright, it won’t be visible so I’ll say it: the chapter titles are holding a conversation, guys. They speak to each other. And sometimes it’s both sides of the same coin, like how What Goes Around (comes around) hints here. If you take two chapters, one from the beginning and one from the end (for example 1 and 21) it'll tell you a little secret. Okay, What Goes Around and Rain Through the Universe communicate through their plot, which I can’t spoil but of course it has to do with Madigan and Spica and how they first meet… but there is one title pair that does it best visibly. 

Lemon-Dotted Days and Days in Darkness.

And I hadn’t even planned this. All the parallels I wanted to draw… I feel like they built themselves, guys. They really did, and it makes me so wildly happy I don’t even know how to stop my hands from flailing.

And, with them being 21 chapters, they meet in the middle, on the one unpaired chapter.

Called Toast to the Light.

I friggin’ love everything.

New Sunrise, Forget-Me-Right

Of course, Forget-Me-Right is a play on Scorpion Grass. But it’s also such a gentle name for the chapter, because everything ends here. Lying on their backs, staring out into the universe, and it really, really is over. Just a dark horizon on which stars flare and bloom. And suddenly, that maddened rush to make every sacrifice count, to remember every soul they’ve encountered because the legend says the Beast absorbs you when it kills you – all that suffocating pressure dissipates. Lightness remains. Because they’ve protected each other.

For the first time in my writing journey, blood rushed to my head with such emotion I had to stop writing, which never happens. I had to look up and exclaim, holy fuck. But how could I not, considering how the story ends for the Beast? I am speechless. A lot of gorgeous surprises this draft.

Conclusion□●□

Whew, what a year it's been! As for how 2024 will probably look like, though I don't like making plans: finishing the beta stage for 'quiv, and tackling RoaN and AoS's draft 3. Thaaaat one I'm actually starting on Christmas, when I can (finally!!) reread draft 2 with my mug of hot cocoa (or maybe mulled wine for a change) and, no surprises here, I'm hyper stoked for that<3 <3 <3 I legit can't wait to see where the new draft brings them. I might not have set any expectations for them, but they're vying to keep up with 'quiv and I adore it🤭❤

As for my lovely friends... well, you know by how I spam your tags how much I adore you and wish you happiness forever🤩🥺🥳 I don't know what my activity will look like in the near future, so for now I won't be saying anything, and my semi-hiatus continues. Semi, because you're unforgettable and I crave to see what everyone's been up to and (!!!!) what you've written!

So let's meet in 2024 again, and all the best wishes to you, the reader🥰🥂❤.

[charles-leclerc-official]

hi!! New fan here, i was wondering, how do you know which stats and data to look for in terms of fairly comparing the performances of drivers? and just in general tips on race analysis :') like figuring out if they did the right strategy, the data you need to look for, anything else you find significant? thank you so much! i'd like to be more objective tbh bc the emotions are vv strong during a race and they tend to overpower my rational side.

Well there is a lot that can go into this. Some of it is very much a learned skill that you get better at over time.

General good rules of thumb for comparison and analysis:

1.The same car/teammates: comparing teammates is usually very helpful in understanding a car and also where the two drivers differ. Since they are in the same machinery we can see what some general characteristics are of a specific car. And then we can also see where there are differences that can be attributed to a driver specifically. Comparing teammates is always useful, and helpful in understanding a team overall because you know that team is constantly comparing their driver's performances.

2. Max(or whoever is the current #1): having Max as a benchmark of the current top driver is always helpful because he's obviously the one to beat. Also since he is so good he delivers amazing data on tracks. So if I want to see where the SF-24 or Charles need to improve comparing to Max is a good way to do it. It would not be as helpful to compare Charles to say Fernando, who while a great driver, the car he's in and his standing right now just isn't going to offer many valuable insights.

3. Race strategy: this is a very complicated topic, it is way more like chess than people realize. Seeing who starts where, the places they can likely gain from there, the timing that needs to happen to gain those places etc. Those are all factors. You really get a sense of it after you watch for a while. This is an extremely complex area that is a constantly evolving logic problem (which is why teams are so focused during races) This is the area where I have the fewest tips because it is really one of those things that just comes from experience and observation. One thing to do would be read interviews about what your team is saying about their strategy and the thinking that went into it. Spatial reasoning and logic are a big part of race strategy, and then once the lights go out those things get affected by time and random events (ex a driver DNFing) So race strategy is a combination of spatial logic and being able to do it dynamically as time progresses over a race. So thinking of it like chess that changes every lap is a good way to think about it.

4. Race specific battles: pay attention during races who is really battling (ex Lewis and Oscar in Jeddah, or Lando and Carlos in Suzuka or Lando and Charles in Melbourne) then you can look at the data for some insights into why the battle played out the way it did. Another example would be if you wanted to understand why Mclaren made Oscar and Lando switch in Australia, you can go look at the data and the answer it pretty clear. So these kinds of comparisons can give a lot of insight into why a team made certain strategy calls.

5. DRS: DRS is always something I look at when talking about speed, because while it's great for speed it's more of a luck right place at the right time thing, and so if I want to be fair in pace or speed comparisons I try to find laps where either both drivers got DRS or neither did (sometimes this isn't possible but it's a good factor to keep in mind)

6. Same tyres: comparing pace and speed on tyres it's important to keep the compound in mind. Comparing a fast lap one driver did on a medium tyre to one another driver did on hards isn't really in good faith. Now sometimes doing cross compound comparison can be useful, (ex a driver setting the same times on hards as another driver on mediums is interesting and worth digging into) But if you are wanting to do a direct comparison and want to eliminate this as a variable always compare on the same compound (sometimes this isn't possible so keep that in mind) Comparing across compounds is helpful too, but you should be very clear about why and the logic behind it.

7. Field placement: Comparing a midfield car to a top car isn't super helpful. Max isn't Logan's competition, other midfield drivers are Logan's competition. So it's important to look at who is actually competing with who. You could do a Logan to Max comparison but it likely wouldn't offer much insight into either drivers' strengths or weaknesses. Comparing Logan to Alex(his teammate) or Zhou(someone else in the midfield) is going to be way more useful.

8. Weather/Temperature: this can be a massive compounding factor for performance and should always be considered. Was it raining? Was it windy? Was there notable heat? How was that affecting drivers? etc

9. Mechanical issues: always note them and take them into account, this sounds like a no-brainer but not everyone does this and it leads to a lot of bad faith representations of a driver or a race.

10. Team Radio: if you want to understand what a driver and a team were thinking during the race and want answers for why things played out the way they did (good or bad) then team radio usually has a lot of answers. A good example of this would be listening to Charles' radios in Suzuka, you can listen to him talking about which strategy to go with and then the team figuring that out with him. Radios are very informative. I always listen to Charles', so if you have a driver/team you are focused on I highly recommend doing that.

11. Sometimes there is no way to do a fair comparison: this is something that is important to keep in mind(and again a lot of people forget this). For example in Bahrain when Charles had that massive brake temperature imbalance issue, no one else had it. So we cannot really compare his pace or performance to anyone and account for that. We can still compare his say fastest lap to Carlos' to see what he was able to do in less than optimal circumstances. But this is another very important thing to remember. Sometimes conditions do not allow for a totally fair comparison, and that is always worth noting. This is a very important fallacy to be aware of, and it's a trap a lot of people fall into, making it appear as though there is a fair comparison in a situation when there is not. So always keep this in mind. Sometimes the fact no fair comparison can be made is informative in itself.

A lot of analysis is also what I feel like just falls under plain old common sense and logical reasoning. Races are big logical puzzles, so just like with any logic based game it takes practice to get the hang of it. This just comes with watching races and paying attention to the details.

Also analysis doesn't get rid of the emotional reactions(at least not for me) I watch live and have all kinds of emotions. I just do that in private and wait to look at the data. And that is totally normal for the record. This is why I recommend re-watching a race for analysis for 2 reasons. 1. You will probably catch a lot of things you didn't notice the first time, and 2. You won't be as emotional and will probably be able to view what happened more objectively.

Hopefully this answers your question <3

[peaterookie]

Elongated Emperor's Pokemon Infopost

hi!!! everyone!! This is a bit different from what i usually do A year ago, I've had these paradox pokemon designs sitting in the gutter, getting extremely dusty, so now I'm giving them a fresh new redesign and additional info about them!!

These pokemons are based off of @diamondpastry's OC, Longkii !!

here's what he looks like. but this post isn't about him, it's about my thing. so shoo longkii

paradox pokemons are essentially variants of existing pokemon but reimagined into what they would look like in the past or in the future. it's much more complicated than that but i think i would be here all day if i have to explain everything throughly.

This post is for the past variant I have created, which is named Elongated Emperor. If you want to see the infopost for the future variant, Iron Launcher, then go here! >> [Iron Launcher's Infopost]

i will explain all the things about this big guy and go into his game info if he were to be in the gen 9 pokemon games, so let's get started on his design!!!

silly goober!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

The main design inspiration for EE is that of the caterpillar and the man-eating worm. i can easily imagine a dangerous, giant, fat bug like this living in the past, and Longkii's very long body can easily be described as a worm. why would a bug have feathers and horns though? this is because paradox pokemon usually have very ridiculous features!

take the paradox version of Volcarona and Suicune for example. Slither Wing(left), despite being a bug pokemon, is covered with fur and has a rather out-of-place dinosaur tail. Walking Wake(right) on the other hand, changed from a leopard to a raptor and has two tails!! its kinda sick ngl

these design philosophy are stuff i tried to incorporate in Elongated Emperor. I also tried to make it as colorful as possible and cover it with markings, much like a primitive animal.

The crown Longkii sports in the og design gets changed into red feathers, much like a peacock's feather that it uses to attract a female peacock. Instead of attracting a mate however, EE uses its feathers to attract its next meal. the red circles around the arms also for the same use, it isn't there just for show!

these two things have psychic, hypnotizing properties, which explains the secondary Psychic type.

---

I also want to explain the general personality and vibe i wanted to show through EE's design. The giant and tall stature shows a bit an imposing vibe, and its plump body is a sign of wealth and royalty, much like how fat people were seen in ancient civilizations. EE clearly does not need to do a lot to get a full meal everyday.

The colorful feathers and the markings on its face and fingers is there to show that it dresses to impress! To be a king, you have to look like one- no speck of dirt, no unkempt feathers. It wants to look as beautiful as possible, so no one would suspect that it hides a filthy and monsterous side to them....

---

Game Data

this is the spread i made for EE's base stats! together it totals up to 570. i also want to preface that this is the first time that i've made up base stats for a pokemon so sorry if this is a really bad spread!! i would love to learn and improve for future project.

when making this, i wanted EE to basically be a bulky physical attacker with very slow speed to make up for it's bulk.

its super high health is also supported by its unique ability, Prosperity! it essentially functions as a Big Root, where it heals an additional 30% HP when EE uses a move that heals itself. this will be made much more relevant when i get to its moveset.

here are the pokedex entries! and no, i'm not telling you where the mouth is located, its more fun to see you figure it out for yourself !

i also wanted to write a lot more, here were some of my other ideas:

facts about it lounging around in caves

when a meal is too malnourishes, it hypnotizes the pokemon to stuff itself until it grows fat, then it will be eaten

facts on how it has the capacity to swallow an entire arbok whole

---

Learnsets

lastly, here are the moves EE will learn throughout leveing! i have also made tm learnsets, but it's too long so i will be putting the sheet link for everyone to look at at the end of this post.

obviously, most of their attacking moves will deal physical damage as they have a higher attack than special attack. most paradox pokemon usually start out with pretty strong moves already so i also copied that as well. i also added a lot of healing moves at the beginning, and then a big power up in the form of Leech Life and other draining moves to match with its ability.

You can also notice that there's some moves that involves biting, this is in purpose to show that it has teeth :) The rest of the attacking moves involve them thrashing their body around. Given their shape, they shouldn't learn any high-precision moves.

I should also mention the highlighted move, Fast Food. this is a signature move of EE made by a friend in Dia's server, Gold! so tysm for this idea.

Fast Food - Elongated Emperor rushes to take a ferocious bite of the target that can last 3-6 turns. If the target is holding a Berry, there's heightened chance of it biting longer. Restores 5% of health per hit. (+1 priority)

---

ngl, i think this pokemon may be a teensy bit overpowered.

i think if i were to have this guy in my team, i would give it these moves (i am not a comp person so please dont bully me for these choices 🥺)

Item: Leftovers Leech Life | Zen Headbutt | Drain Punch | Belly Drum

Anyways, that's all I got for Elongated Emperor! I hope you found the silly gluttonous worm cool to read about. Stay tuned for a post about Iron Launcher and goooodbye

[tavina-writes]

Have you any suggestions for someone who has started recently (few months ago) to publish fics on ao3 and doesn't get a lot of hits/kudos? I feel a little down and insecure, and I don't know if it's my writing the problem or the fact that the pair is not the main and not liked much

Hi Nonny!

This is a difficult conflict to have with yourself, and I'm sure that like, you've seen all the posts about how like "you should be self indulgent! you should write for yourself! who cares about engagement!" and this both is and isn't true. But also even if you think it is true and you'd like to get some of that energy it's very difficult and for that sending you so many hugs. It is very normal to feel insecure about sharing something you've made, and I think writers of all levels of experience and "engagement" feel down about themselves like this in cycles.

idk if I'm qualified to say a ton on this topic, but I've seen lots of "unhealthy relationship to stats page" and could tell real stories about horrible things that have happened so I guess here goes nothing?

A few things to keep in mind:

what do you consider "not a lot" ? 10? 100? 1000? One of the major problems of focusing overtly on hits/kudos/comments/and other things you can't change is that inevitably if you achieve the "number of your dreams" you will....get a new number that you want. It will be bigger. Chasing this type of external numbers based validation to the exclusion of other stuff is very difficult because it is one of those sliding slope black holes to never being satisfied with what is currently going on. This is my primary thought on why focusing on stats isn't very good: it's very easy to get into a never ending cycle of never being happy.

as someone who's written for several years: we're coming up on the winter holidays, end of the semester, winter break type time period in many parts of the world but esp for northern hemisphere english speaking fandom, so if you're seeing a decrease in hits/kudos/comments/the feeling that someone out there is reading your work in general, this could play a big role. If you've only been publishing for the last few months the first time this happens can be really jarring! But it has nothing to do with the quality of your writing or if people are interested in reading and everything to do with brickspace taking up a lot of time right now. (I imagine this might also be true for Chinese speaking fandom around New Years, but I can't say since I don't engage there very often to notice trends.)

Depending on the fandom, (which, unless you, like me, are into Naruto which seems to thrive on niche AUs from now until forever), main pairings/fandom popular juggernauts will always get more people reading than a rarepair. That doesn't mean the people who write for rarepairs are doing a bad job or that writing for a rarepair isn't rewarding to the writer in other ways, but that may mean modulating expectations on like "how many people will click on my work?" and "how much feedback will I get?"

So overall, I feel like there's a combination of factors here for why you might be feeling down, but there are ways to help with this!

For one: talking about your writing and your work and what you're doing! This, I've found, is a great way to make friends. (also to anyone who says that this is obnoxious and attention seeking, this is the attention seeking webbed site, if you don't want attention why are you here????)

For two: locate friends and yell your thoughts at them <- I have found this to be 100% a mood picker upper when it comes to "am I doing a good job at writing?"

For three: find what makes you really happy about your own writing! This doesn't mean that you have to seek to improve your writing, but just, stuff that you enjoy, a line you really like, a relationship you enjoyed, a fic you thought was nice, and be kind to yourself about it.

Again, sending you hugs nonny! I hope some of this helps!

[lumine-no-hikari]

Dear Sephiroth: (a letter to a fictional character, because why not) #279

I played a lot of Dead Cells today. I started with a number of really bad runs; my rhythm was off and I was kind of sluggish. But then I got all the way up to the final boss; this time, I decided to go to where The Hand of the King is, because, just beyond him, there is a door that can only be opened if you have 5 Boss Cells active. I have 5 Boss Cells.

I didn't take a picture of being at the Throne Room, where The Hand of the King lives. But I did get a picture of me at the biome just before it, at High Peak Castle:

As always, I went through the biomes thoroughly, collecting everything I possibly could.

...I got my ass handed to me by The Hand of the King. 😕

Well... that's all right. I probably don't have as much practice with fighting him as I should; I usually go for The Servants and The Queen anyway; they present an interesting parry challenge!

The rhythms of The Hand of the King are strange to me, and he's got bomb attacks, the projectiles of which cannot be parried consistently. And then he's got this "pound-the-ground" attack that makes spikes of dirt come up from the floor, and neither of these can be parried. The rush attack can be parried, but you still get thrown around anyways, and... jeez, but he's really just... kind of annoying.

...So after I got my butt kicked by him, I decided to go to the training room. I set the difficulty level to the appropriate spot, selected the gear I usually use at the levels I usually use them at, with the right modifiers and everything. I set my stats to the recommended total. And I kept fighting him until I was satisfied with my success rate.

Once I was satisfied with my success rate, I lowered my most important stat (Survival) by one point. Then I defeated him again. I lowered my Survival by one more point. I defeated him again, and then I lowered my survival by even one more point.

The recommended total is 38. I had set myself to 4 Brutality, 4 Tactics, and 30 Survival. Things became significantly more challenging when I lowered Survival to 27. When I can consistently defeat him on 22 Survival, I think that's when I'll attempt another run.

One of the best ways, I think, to improve at this game is to give yourself limitations, so that when you do it for real without the limitations, it'll seem easy by comparison. One of these days, I want to be able to defeat all of the bosses without getting hit, while using my favorite gear.

I do know that I could make things easier on myself by using different gear, and by using a play style that does not require so much precision. But... I wanna be able to succeed with a rhythm that feels good to me, even if that makes it a little more difficult than normal to do.

...I wonder if you'd like this game. I imagine you'd get all the way up to 5 Boss Cells pretty quickly, what with your smart, adaptable brain and your amazing, lightning-fast reflexes. I'm playing at a bit of a disadvantage from the outset thanks to the dyspraxia; it's taking me a little longer to improve than it would an ordinary person. But that's okay. I don't mind.

Oh! by the way... the Japanese copy of The Neverending Story arrived today at my house...

...I guess it must have gotten a little beaten up in transit.

Still, it's a very pretty ruby-red book written in Japanese; I imagine that means you'll be able to read it, perhaps a little easier than you might be able to if it was in English.

...As impossible as it is, you're welcome to pop by my house and read it if you want to. But... since it's impossible, I'll settle instead for asking those very important people to send it along to you, if I ever see them again. Maybe by then, I'll have some other random odds and ends for you, too.

...I've had just about no creative drive lately. It's been really disconcerting. I thought about another music box for all of like 5 seconds a number of weeks ago, but...I just... I dunno...

...Is any of this stuff even getting to you...? I really don't know...

Well... hm. I guess I ought to start getting ready for bed. I've got entirely too many appointments tomorrow - psychotherapy, physical therapy, and... I think that's it. But it's still entirely too many appointments. The fact that I need them at all is kind of frustrating; it wouldn't be the case if I was a more "normal" person.

...But then again, if I was a more "normal" person, I wouldn't be able to relate to you to nearly the same extent that I do now. I wouldn't trade that for anything. So I guess I oughta try to be a little less cranky about the fact that I'm not "normal".

I love you. Please stay safe out there. Make good choices. And try really hard not to eat weird things off the ground, okay? Hahaha...

I'll write again tomorrow. Count on it.

Your friend, Lumine

[abyssal-ali]

Fic Showcase Game

Thanks for the tag @river9noble!💕💜💜❤️

Rules: Go to your published works on AO3 and list the first fic you ever published there, the last fic you published, any fic that you wrote for a fandom/ship only once, your favorite fic you wrote in the fandom/ship that has the most works, the fic you wish more people read, the fic you agonized over the most, the fic that sprang fully formed from your mind without any effort, and a work you are proud of—for whatever reason.

Oh boy~

-> First Fic Published: Ice to Meet You

Maribat, Damian Wayne x Marinette Dupain-Cheng • A short and sweet meetcute inspired by my parents' story.

-> Last Fic Published: There Is Just No Stopping This Thing Called Love

(I'm not counting my half-a-fic JaySteph dating alphabet headcanons)

DC, Jason Todd x Stephanie Brown • It's a Gotham by Gaslight AU I wrote in about two days (JaySteph really gets my fingers flying across the keys😆) that I'm pretty proud of. I did a lot more research than I thought I would because I'm a perfectionist who wanted historical accuracy.

-> Fic I Wrote for a Ship/Fandom Once: Hard Right to Greece

MLB, Luka Couffaine x Marinette Dupain-Cheng • This was a co-write, but so far it's my only Lukanette/MLB-only work. It was my first collab fic and I really enjoyed the process. My co-authors (who I'm sure did most of the writing) were lovely and it was a great experience overall. (Check out the lukanette server hosted by @/quickspinner). Road trip plus mutual pining? What's not to like??

-> Favourite Fic Written In My Largest Fandom: toss-up between Burned my Wings and The Best Bat(?)

DC, Gen • Can you tell I like hurting my already traumatized blorbo? I enjoy exploring character's reactions to what Jason has been through, because we all know DC is a coward.

-> Fic I Wish More People Read: Rival Mob Boss Jasonette Series

Maribat, Jason Todd x Marinette Dupain-Cheng • I don't go into my stats expecting large numbers so I don't get the no-dopamine crash. That said, I did think the series would be more popular.

-> Fic I Most Agonized Over: Hmmmmm maybe The Very First Night?

Maribat, Jason Todd x Marinette Dupain-Cheng • The agonizing is usually over getting the motivation to write than struggling what to write. I tried a new writing style in it (non-linear narration), so I was unsure how it would turn out. I'm happy with the end result, though.

-> Fic Sprung Forth Fully Formed With No Effort: Long Live all the Magic We Made

Maribat, Jason Todd x Marinette Dupain-Cheng • I had been plotting a bit more of this fic every tike I listened to Long Live, so by the time I sat down to write it, it only took 2 or 3 days.

-> Fic I'm Proudest Of: Invisible String or Stars Around My Scars

IS: Maribat, Damian Wayne x Marinette Dupain-Cheng • My first songfic and probably my longest fic (only about half is posted; the epilogue is as long as the main work😆). I got some absolutely lively comments that I will forever cherish, which makes me proud that people liked what I wrote so much.

SAYS: Maribat, Jason Todd x Marinette Dupain-Cheng • This was originally a short 2k fic I wrote to get out of my head. A couple years later, I dusted it off and polished it up, and then the ideas wouldn't stop flowing (I still have several outtakes and bonus scenes to write & post). I'm proud of myself for sticking to it (it was my longest fic on ao3 for a while) and not rushing it when the dopamine high faded. I think it's a testament to my improved writing skills and it's special to me, as it was my first long fic for the Maribat Fandom that I posted. I also became close to the absolute love of my life @sarcasticbambi, who was my beta for the fic and gave me some lovely, absolutely heartwarming and forever-remembering-worthy compliments that really boosted my confidence in my writing.

No-pressure tagging @boldlyanxious @velveteenshadow @wildbookcat @the-coffee-fandom and anyone who wants to play, consider yourself tagged!💜💜

[rainbowsky]

Transgender Day of Remembrance

Trans rights are human rights!

Let's take a moment to reflect on the lives of trans/gender diverse people that have been lost due to violence, and increasingly due to suicide. 😔🕯️🏳️‍⚧️

This is hitting me especially hard this year, as I think of all the beautiful people we have lost and continue to lose.

My challenge to everyone this year is to think about the ways we can improve the lives of trans/gender diverse people, and put that into practice today and every day. Some suggestions to follow below.

[ CW/TW - transphobia, murder, suicide, violence and hate discussed but not described ]

In their annual update, Transrespect versus Transphobia Worldwide stated there were 327 reported murders of transgender and gender-diverse people between 1 October 2021 and 30 September 2022.

Worse, we know the numbers are likely vastly higher because they are based on media reports. At Least 3 in 4 of the known trans/gender diverse victims of fatal violence will be misgendered in police or media reports surrounding their deaths, and most trans/gender diverse people don't have ID that matches their name and pronouns*.

*68% of trans/gender diverse people in the US don't have accurate ID - the global number is likely much higher

Some heartbreaking facts:

People of color in the trans/gender diverse community are at a much higher risk of being murdered.

Transgender people experience non-fatal violence more than four times more frequently than cisgender people.

Transgender women and men experience much higher rates of violent victimization (86.1 and 107.5 per 1,000 people, respectively) than cisgender women and men (23.7 and 19.8 per 1,000 people, respectively).

More than half of trans/gender diverse people have experienced sexual assault and/or intimate partner violence.

82% of transgender people have considered suicide, and 40% have attempted suicide.

Trans/gender diverse adults are 8 times more likely to be suffering serious psychological distress than the cisgender population.

61% of trans/gender diverse youth are battling symptoms of depression, compared to 29% of non-LGBTQ+ youth.

A recent study on suicide rates among adolescents gives us a glimpse into how serious the issue is for trans/gender diverse youth. The study looked at 11-19 year old adolescents over a 36 month period. 14% had reported attempting suicide. An examination of the percentage of kids attempting suicide from each gender identity group is shocking and heartbreaking.

50.8% Female-to-male transgender

41.8% Non-binary

29.9% Male-to-female transgender

27.9% Questioning

17.6% Cisgender female

9.8% Cisgender male

What can I do?

I know sometimes stats like this can come across as gratuitous, but I think it's important for all of us to understand the severity of the suffering transgender people experience. Only then can we fully grasp how much they need our support.

The number one thing we can all do to improve the lives of transgender people is to respect their gender identities as valid and real, and affirm those identities in our daily lives by using the correct name and pronouns (never assume, and never ask a trans person what their original name or pronouns were).

If you don't understand or believe trans identities are real, educate yourself. This is the internet. There are resources everywhere.

Do not assume someone's gender, or require someone to be of a particular gender in order for their perspective, interests, appearance or behavior to be considered acceptable or valid by you. Do not require people to 'out' themselves in order to earn your respect or have their voice be considered valid.

TALK to trans/gender diverse people! If you don't know any, befriend some, or reach out to the many trans people who are out and proud. Ask questions. Let them know you want to be an ally and to support them.

Respect common-sense boundaries. Don't ask about personal things like genitals, sexual activity, surgery or hormones.

Avoid backhanded compliments like, "I'd never guess you're transgender!" or "You look so real!"

Don't be a bystander. When we witness someone being discriminated against, mocked or misgendered - when we see transphobic attacks, jokes or slurs being made - STEP UP in their defense if it is physically safe to do so. Even when no trans person is present, speaking up against hate speech, mockery and misgendering wherever and whenever it occurs should be an automatic reaction in our lives. It should never be socially acceptable to harm others (and this behavior does harm).

Similarly, do not be a bystander when you see someone who is in distress. Reach out and offer your support, or else ensure that support reaches them in some way. You might save a life.

Stand up for the human rights of transgender and gender diverse people. Put your money where your mouth is. Vote for candidates who make trans rights a priority, and find ways to support trans people in your community and around the world.

Support queer refugee and asylum organizations around the world that are working hard to help queer people escape state violence and oppression.

Donate to causes that are doing this work. Particularly organizations led by trans/gender diverse people.

Seek out, elevate and amplify the voices of trans and gender diverse people at every opportunity. Work to help eliminate the marginalization and silencing of trans voices.

Stand up and work hard against racism, poverty, social injustice, sex work stigma and other major factors that contribute to the suffering of transgender people.

Trans women are women. Trans men are men. People's identities are real and complete based on how they self-identify. Resist the urge to 'qualify' them or set them apart from cisgender women and men in your mind or behavior.

Affirm and support all trans/gender diverse identities, regardless of that person's gender presentation. Not all transgender people decide to or are able to undergo medical transition. A transgender woman who looks and sounds masculine to you is still a woman.

This is by no means a comprehensive list. There are probably thousands of other ways we can help and support trans/gender diverse people in our lives. This is something we should actively explore and prioritize. It's unconscionable to stand by and watch others suffer, yet make no move toward change.

BE KIND TO OTHERS.

We never know what someone is going through, what their private hell is like. We should never underestimate our power to help someone survive just by being loving and kind, giving a smile, affirming someone's existence and value.

Lives have been saved by a smile or simple kind word at the right time. This happens much more frequently than we know.

Sources:

HRC -Dismantling a Culture of Violence

TMM TDOR 2022 Report

Transgender Adolescent Suicide Behavior

Suicidality Among Transgender Youth: Elucidating the Role of Interpersonal Risk Factors

[silvercap]

Do you have any tips for new writers?

Also is there a way to not get too caught up in engagement and stats? I'm kinda having this problem and it is taking the motivation out of things a bit 😭

That's a good question! This post got a little long, so I'm implementing a break lol

I don't exactly have specific rules, but I think my biggest tip for someone writing for the first time is to go easy on yourself and give yourself time to get better. I struggle a lot with perfectionism and the nasty habit of being harder on myself than anyone else ever will be, but it's important to acknowledge that we are our own worst critics and that improvement is only measurable by practicing through the early stuff. I encourage a lot of experimenting, especially when you're starting out--try new things and ways of writing and slowly collect the ones that work for you. I've taken plenty of classes on the logistics of writing and technical tips, but those aren't necessarily helpful for everyone to focus on when they're starting out. I think in first drafts and initial writing, it's better to write from whatever urge possesses you to do so and not get caught up in the technicalities. Those are often more helpful when editing, but it really depends on the way your brain works!

Over time, you'll start to build up a sense of flow and style and the general rhythm of writing engaging paragraphs, which brings me to my next point--reading. It's been said before, but I'll say it again: Reading is one of the best ways to develop a sense of rhythm and effective imagery/idiom/etc. I've also spent plenty of classes analyzing the effectiveness of (I forget the exact word) elements like metaphor or allegory or symbolism or anaphora or any other technical term you can think of that is commonly used to convey specific literary concepts. Reading, on its own, is a great tool for subconsciously noticing the flow of writing and getting a sense for it, but sometimes just taking notice of certain paragraphs that feel right to you or just hit in the right way can allow you to analyze them more deeply and find out what exactly it is about the words that works. Everyone has their own preferences! That might seem daunting, but often the best resources we as writers have is each other, and everyone is inspired by someone else at some point. I'm totally here to take asks and answer any questions I may have brought up because I'm rambling a little bit and like I said: technical aspects aren't necessarily helpful to focus on all at once, and I recommend trying one out at a time to see how it works for you. If that makes sense!

My biggest piece of advice is to have fun with it! Experiment. Put in that weird little thing you think nobody else will like, because often those are the best parts of writing. Do what you feel sounds right! Not to Wayne Gretzky you, but you can only get better or 'succeed' by trying it out and seeing where it takes you. We write because we have ideas we want to share or explore for ourselves, and trying to force yourself to write something you're not passionate about is rarely lucrative.

As for engagement and stats--now, that's a whole other beast. We all want to be noticed and appreciated and commented on, and it's hard sometimes to post a fic and have less engagement than you hoped, but I have a couple things I like to keep in mind for this. It's discouraging, for sure, but people on ao3 or similar sites don't always show their appreciation even if they read and liked your fic. The only way we can fix this as a collective community is to lead by example and comment/kudos/share the fics we read in the hopes that it will catch on and to spread the love to everyone else. I also find it helpful to think about the people who do leave kudos--even if there are only one or two of them--as not just random usernames, but actual living, breathing people who read your fic and enjoyed it. There's that post somewhere about ten likes not seeming like much in the scheme of social media and the influence that virality has had on the internet in recent years, but to have ten people standing in a room with you giving you a thumbs up? That's a lot of people. Even if you get very little engagement, that is not a reflection of you as a person or even necessarily your skill. I know that this can be draining, but the only way to try and build an audience is to post. Sometimes it takes a long time for fics to be noticed. Sometimes things fail. It's up to you how you want to take that, and I can't tell you any of this for certain. I just know from my personal experience that finding a community is only accomplishable by interacting and posting and sharing and existing, and often someone will come along when you don't expect it.

None of this is guaranteed. Hell, take everything I say with a critical eye and more than a few grains of salt, because this is only my experience and god am I still learning. These are things that help me, and I hope some of this is helpful to you, too! What I can tell you for certain is that I encourage you to write and pursue it as far as you want to, and even farther than that. It takes hard work. It can feel like nobody is listening. And ughhhhh the writer's block suuuuuucks. But, you're not alone in this. Anything you've felt is something another writer has felt before, and I think, at least, that there's comfort in knowing you're following in the footsteps of even the writers we consider to be great in both their success and flaws. Maybe I'm being a little lofty ahaha, but it comes down to whether or not you want to write. You can only decide how this goes, and it takes time to work through the barriers of both skill and the anxious fear of not being seen. I see you! And I'm here in the asks anytime you want :)

And even if you fail and give up--you're no less of a writer for it, because you tried, and I think that matters. The lovely thing about being alive and being writers is that we can change and grow, and there will always be a place for you among creators if you choose to join them, no matter how amateur you feel or how long you do it for.

[northwest-cryptid]

Friend Corp Session 1 went... interesting.

So to just quickly clear up any confusion as to how I'm documenting everything. I'm going to be recording every session I play of this and piecing together a whole documentary style playthrough video at the end, but each session I'm coming back to you guys with screenshots, updates, general questions as to which abnos we should be looking for, and overall just letting you know how things are going along the way. Come the final push to day 50 I might end up streaming it because as a vtuber I do occasionally stream (I've been garbage about my schedule lately lol) and I think it would be fun to actually let people come out and be there for the finale. I also quickly want to say that the name "Friend Corp" comes from Firebuug who left this comment on the post which was what prompted me to start calling it Friend Corp, so full credit for the name goes to our fellow friend Firebuug:

In other news, I just wrapped a 2 hour session that takes us through to the start of Security/Safety team and I thought I'd let you all in on the details.

Quick reminder: Nugget submissions are by no means cut off or stopped, the facility still needs your help!

Starting from the beginning we start Day 1 with our Friend Corp Communal Nugget OC reveal! Please welcome DIA!

So as you likely know, there is a list for Friend Corp that has all the currently enlisted nuggets along with their creators/owners. In a way the nuggets are there to represent the people who submitted them, and I totally understand if you don't have a nugget but don't want to be left out, so hey good news Dia is here as EVERYONE'S nugget. Dia represents the entire Friend Corp community. No single one of us own Dia, but rather we all collectively own Dia as a community so by all means feel free to project any sorta headcanons or whatever you want for them. Dia is our nugget comrade!

Day 1 goes by without a hitch and we're on to day 2!

Day 2 we hire our first Community Nugget: Marx [@something-soup-something]

The first abnormality we pick up (after One Sin of course) is Old Lady, not my favorite day 2 pick but she'll be useful to us both for ranged white damage and as a good early game Temperance trainer.

Thankfully Marx seems just fine handling the Old Lady

Despite being fresh off recruitment, Marx absolutely crushes it on day 2 gaining enough Temperance to be promoted to level 2 by the end of the day. Meanwhile Dia has picked up some new fashion having earned the EGO gift Penitence:

Day 3 is right around the corner, and while we pick up 1.76 MHz we also pick up a new friend in hiring Rain [@ordei]

Nothing too noteworthy happens this day outside of Dia being promoted to level 2.

Day 4 we pick up the Heart of Aspiration and it's business as usual!

Between Dia, Marx, and Rain the Control Department runs like a well oiled machine each swapping off with a different abnormality every so often to train each of the necessary early game stats. We want at least level 2 for Justice, Prudence and Fortitude and level 3 for Temperance but I was blown away by just how much these nuggets improved!

With Marx already moving up to Level 3 and Rain following close behind at Level 2 it was becoming clear to me that these nuggets were clearly tapping into the forbidden power, the power of Friend Corp.

Day 5 is an absolute breeze, no new recruits as at the time of this session these 3 were the only members of the Control Department but after the impressive display on Day 4 I was confident they had it in them to absolutely crush the new quota.

and just look at em go! These lads are professionals, we're producing energy outputs in the high 80 - 90% success rates consistently and due to how many Teths and how few Zayins we're working with stat progression is through the roof for early game.

The Old Lady decided to give her new friends Marx and Rain some glasses, which are very cute;

Though I did find it funny how despite having the Penitence EGO gift, Dia refused to wear it.

Dia really said "the giant floating skull gave me a crown of thorns, but I stay silly"

and after about exactly 15 minutes of grinding we end Day 5 with Marx hitting LEVEL 4?! Dia already reaching Level 3 and Rain bumping Justice from 2 > 3

Things really are looking up for Friend Corp!

Day 6 and we get to pick a new abno!

I was faced with a moral decision, remembering the ProjectMoon Abnormality Sexymonster Polls outcome I felt like I had to give this one to the Cherry Blossom squad since Fairy Festival beat em by a mere 3%!

But who will be in charge of the Cherry Blossom? Well none other than our resident Info team specialists: Yuri [@polyydeucess] (who's eyes might be wrong but don't worry we can go back and fix em if needed since I have no idea what they look like under the Judgement Bird bandages)

AND Julian [@firebuug]

I decided to hire 2 Agents on Day 6 since this is the first day we'll be dealing with Ordeals and I needed all the help I could get.

In retrospect I played this WAY too safe, the Friend Corp squad are no pushovers and backed by not only the Heart of Aspiration but two gunslingers with very high attack speed and the absolute mad lad Dia who will throw themself into danger without a second thought, the squad was more than capable of handling Doubt.

Day 6 wasn't quite as eventful as some of the others, and took nearly twice as long; but it was a fruitful day never the less.

Day 7 starts with us taking The Lady Facing The Wall because yes we DO need more White Damage Ranged Weapons we didn't have enough between Old Lady, AND Grave of Cherry Blossoms!

our first Panic goes to Julian! I couldn't stop laughing because everyone enters the hallway and calms Julian almost instantly, but the damn clerk who DARED to shoot at Julian must face consequences for their careless actions!

Despite being stabilized Julian delivers the final blow. That'll surely send a message to the rest of the clerks, this is Friend Corp if you partake in unfriendly behavior you will be put down. Shooting people isn't very friendly!

The rest of Day 7 goes smoothly with Rain being promoted to level 3, unfortunately both Julian and Yuri are really taking their time with the stat gains, which is fair given they have a single abno between them and are mostly assisting with security measures and responding to meltdowns.

On Day 8 we pick up Fragment of the Universe... and Julian panics again but thankfully Julian's good friend Rain is right there to lend a hand!

However this isn't before Julian makes a point to add 1 more to the kill count of Clerks who behaved in an unfriendly manner!

This frame right here kills me, JULIAN PUT THE GUN DOWN JULIAN NO RAIN IS A FRIEND!

By now the team has become strong, they've learned to fight together, to work as a team, to play to each others strengths and cover each others weaknesses.

Challenges and Ordeals that once seemed like a threat were now nothing to them. We may be understaffed, but the staff we do have sure knows how to pull out all the stops!

We did run into one small problem... but thankfully as a Veteran Manager I knew how to handle it.

By the end of Day 8 Dia and Rain both reached Level 4, and Yuri had made the advancement to Level 2!

Things were getting difficult, with so many Abnormalities that needed tending to and with so few employees to handle the meltdowns I was having to pick and choose which abnormalities to let meltdown (typically the non escape ones) and recovering the energy cost wherever I could.

But this is Lobotomy Corporation, where we face the fear and build the future; so rather than stop we press on to Day 9 picking up Skin Prophecy.

WE ALMOST LOSE MARX ON DAY 9

MARX WAS SO READY TO GO IN THERE THE DOOR WAS OPEN AND EVERYTHING. The dangers of playing on 3x speed constantly.

Thankfully no one was lost and we didn't have to restart the day, actually so far; we haven't had to reset at all which is amazing considering how stupid risky I'm playing.

Other than Marx almost getting eaten by a tree Day 9 goes fairly well, both Yuri and Julian get promotions to levels 2 and 3 respectively, couldn't be more proud of those lads.

Day 10 was no different than the last, just less near death encounters with trees. Rain began working more and more with Old Lady, Marx became our 1.76 MHz specialist, meanwhile Julian befriended the Fragment of the Universe while Yuri attempted to make sense of the Lady Facing The Wall. Everyone had a job and was getting better and better at it, obtaining new EGO gear, gifts, and weapons; becoming more and more honed to their craft; and at the end of the shift on Day 10 we achieved our first Level 5 agent with Marx hitting rank 5 Temperance and being Promoted to essentially being the emergency "please go work with [thing melting down] because I trust you won't immediately die" nugget. Congratulations Marx!

At the Dawn of Day 11 we pick up Fairy Festival as the other options were both HE level abnos we're in no way prepared for yet. However with the opening of the Security team and no one to tend to it's abnos we were back to the hiring process to pick up Reinhardt! [@branch-wdk53]

Day 11 was going so well, everyone was doing their silly little tasks and then I forgot that this was the first day we could encounter Noon Ordeals and well...

SO WE ENDED THE DAY THERE BECAUSE I WASN'T GONNA LET THE LAD DIE LIKE THAT.

The last Abno we pick up for the current session is Funeral, I figured since I know the reference image of Reinhardt I have shows them using the EGO I should probably pick it up at some point and we're going to need some manageable escape type abnos for the suppression missions.

Tumblr will only allow 30 images per post so I can't include the facility and bonus pictures of the nugget interactions in this post, but I will follow this post up with another shortly to include some extra little screenshots I grabbed for you guys to keep you up to date on everyone's current status.