#bee butt is all you need

[tvrningout-a]

just giving y’all a wee heads up that i’m going through a lil funky period, hence the lack of writing! i’m fine, so there’s no need to worry; i’m just a bit stressed bc i have a lot on my mind rn. i’ll do my best to muster the motivation to write over the next few days! and regardless if i do or not, i appreciate y’all’s patience with me 💜

[merkerlerspeaks]

Zodi/Celeste/Raine is somehow both my baby and also the girl my inner little weird girl looks up to so much she adopts parts of her as her personality

[obsessedwrhys]

hi baby, you can make an hcs of the characters from The Boys with a Harley Quinn! readers?? With all characters including Soldier Boy

ᶻ 𝗓 𐰁 .ᐟ THE BOYS X HARLEY QUINN!READER

ᯓ★ looots of goofy shit, dark humour, gore, sensitive topics (abuse, toxic relationships, etc), toxicity, reader is fem!!

ᯓ★ Characters included (I couldn't do everyone so I just did these guys, I know yer kind missy 👴): Homelander, Black Noir (Old and New), Butcher, Soldier Boy

HOMELANDER

He's honestly so fed up with you.

Sure he loves watching you mess with people but he does not like it when YOU DO IT TO HIM!!!

"Quinn!" He'd shout for your name and you'd open the door to see him standing outside your room. You laugh when you see him covered in ketchup. One of your many pranks.

"What?? You needed the upgrade for the suit cupcake" You smiled all innocently.

That being said you LOVE pulling pranks on him.

Whether if it's putting hair dye in his shampoo or stealing his suit so he wakes up searching for it.

It's just your favourite thing to do.

There have been times he's tried to kill you due to his rage but it takes every cell in his body to stop himself because he knows that he's not able to do that.

Because why? Because he thinks you don't even deserve to be killed by him directly.

You disgust him that much.

He just wishes that you weren't such a pain in his ass.

If the pranks weren't bad enough that it had him double checking every item he uses, AKA worsening his trust issues. You've also came up with nicknames to mock his superhero status.

"If it ain't the flying dick!" You'd address his entrance to everybody the moment he walked in the meeting room.

Just imagine him suddenly stop and standing at the door like 🧍‍♂️

If you wanna know more nicknames, we've got captain narcissist, america's buttplug and sperm cell.

Trust you are never sent on safely planned missions, only the ones he knows are highly dangerous in hopes of you dying...

There was this one time he sent you on a suicide mission and he was all proud of himself, but just as he thought he finally got rid of you, the elevator door slides open to reveal you, some fabrics of your clothes were ripped and there were bruises all over your body but it didn't seem to bother you.

"What's up toots?" You'd smile even though your nose was bleeding. That's when he looked down to see the head of the guy he asked for you to assassinate.

Who also happened to be one of the most protected men in the nations by the way.

Like how the fuck did you do it?

You're not even an ACTUAL supe!!

Regardless, he has his respects for you but really why WONT YOU LEAVE HIM THE FUCK ALONE.

PLEASE STOP FLIRTING WITH HIM SO CASUALLY ITS WEIRD??!???!?

ALSO DONT PINCH HIS BUTT!!!

You once did that during a meeting and the sight of him yelping as his body jumps was unforgettable!!

You're JUST like a bee addicted to its pollen. P.S, he's the pollen.

BLACK NOIR (OLD)

He.. doesn't... understand you??

Why do you enjoy showering him with love??

You say it's in your nature but why do you always ask to be carried around the tower??

And why does he obliges each time??

Apparently how your mindset works is that you find extremely deadly things to be adorable.

In this case, he's the extremely deadly thing.

With his silent nature, you just NEEDED to get a reaction out of him.

You tried tickling him or making him sneeze but he always just stares at you in confusion.

You can't see his face but you can tell he's giving you the "What are you doing?" Face.

That's when your bright ass thought of a plan.

A dumb and reckless idea... but hey! You have suicidal tendencies so this is fine!

You'd put yourself in danger on purpose just for him to always come rescuing you. He has lost many body parts when doing so but you could care less, you would give him those heart eyes as he carried you back to Vought in bridal style...

Just for the managers to lock you up in a small prison cell to prevent you from pulling more of these stunts.

Though they were never enough to hold you back.

Naturally there would be rumours in the industry if you two were dating and you never hesitate to push those rumours even more.

Imagine for a premiere for your movie, you'd walk on the red carpet in a dress with Noir beside you, still in his signature suit.

"You're looking real good tonight, handsome. I'm liking what I see" You'd say with your arm wrapped around his. He looks at you as you winked at him seductively.

Someone save this poor boy from your endless flirting.

Jokes aside, there has been times he's seen you in your lowest, like that time you trashed your room with your makeup melted from your tears.

Apparently you got rejected from a movie role you wanted to get so badly. Which was Mario but stupid Chris fucking Pratt got it instead.

Seeing the state you were in, he'd grab you by the shoulders firmly and make you sit down, then putting a blanket around you. He'd leave the room for a couple of minutes... to come back with a bucket of ice cream for you to happily snack on as you rest your head on his shoulder.

BLACK NOIR (NEW)

"EW!! Get this mo'fuckin' bastard away from me!" Literally your words when you heard about the replacement.

Is a bit hurt by your disgust towards him??

But that just means he knows what he's doing right or wrong with this new role.

No because seriously everything he does, he would stop to watch for your reaction, most of the time you are never impressed.

Like how he killed those homelander fans to frame the starlighters. He'd hold the bat, his mask all bloody as he turned to see you, arms crossed, no reaction to his performance.

UNTIL at the end of season 4 where he began killing people within the company, that was what got you to start growing interest in his character.

Even though you're fine with him, for now, you really don't like it when he pushes things.

As in trying too hard to replace the old Black Noir. You just don't fw it 😡

"Hey! Hey! Harley wait up!" He'd call out for you while you ignored him and decided to speed walk away. Anyways, he manages to catch up with you.

"The team wants us to attend the premiere of your next movie together.. since.... y'know... we're rumoured to be dating??" He said and you had to stop walking to put your entire energy into giving him the most NASTIEST look. The second he sees you take a deep breath, he knew it was over.

"I ain't yer GODDAMN babysitter, and don't you think that for a second that wearin' the suit makes you my damn boyfriend, alright? I ain't here to hold yer hand and coddle you. I got better things to do than listen to yer constant whining and need for attention. So knock it off, ya copy-cat!" You'd point at him before walking off, hand on your hip.

You can bet that he asks Deep for advices on how to win your heart.

BRO IS TOO INVESTED IN HIS CHARACTER 😭

That's why he thinks making you fall for him is one of Noir's characteristics.

You love mysterious and threatening looking people? Okay gotcha.

You want hyenas for pets? Cha-Ching! Got it!

But seriously someone please tell him to stop before he gets his ass beat. He does not want that Brooklyn smoke.

BILLY BUTCHER

Ah great another crazy chick.

The only possibility to why you'd be apart of the boys is if someone vouched for you.

50/50 it's either Hughie or Frenchie.

Though surprisingly enough, you were the first to notice the symptoms of his virus. Like he could be fidgeting at the office and you'd point it out so casually that everybody turns to look at you in confusion.

Everybody thought you were crazy at first, it's to be expected, but the second his virus was confirmed to be lethal. Everybody has started to take you a bit more seriously.

Read carefully. A bit.

He finds your weapons fascinating though. Like how your gun has words engraved in it, your initials being the biggest. Not to mention the designs being the inspiration of poker cards.

"That must make you the clown" He once said when you whipped it out to shoot someone. You smile mischievously at his remark.

"Oh you'd better watch your tongue before I make you the punchline of my next joke!"

He likes you.

ONLY if you don't fuck anything up.

Sure you guys do argue a lot but theres also strange moments of understanding between you two.

There was this one time he found you alone in the office, your legs placed on the table and you were literally downing a bottle of alcohol. It was when he came closer that he noticed the bruises on your body.

"What the hell happened to you?" He said and you sniffed as you quickly wipe away the tears in your eyes.

"Oh, I'm just peachy, tough guy... Can't you see I'm having a little cry-fest over here after a lover's spat with my oh-so-darling ex-boyfriend. Yeah, he just looooves to use me as his personal punchin' bag, y'know? But don't worry 'bout me. I'll be back to my ol' crazy self in no time. Just need a minute to let the tears dry and the bruises heal"

For the rest of the night he'd stay to talk about how shitty both your lives are. You guys actually BOND over your past traumas.

The booze just making the conversation ever more fun.

Will go out of his way to take you to places for shopping or eating at a restaurant to make you feel better.

After understanding you better, he realised you're just a once normal person who became a psychotic sociopath after whatever the supes did to wrong you.

He may not show it to you but he really cares about you and would not hesitate to protect you despite how much he says he wish you'd just fuck off.

SOLDIER BOY

You have to be some kind of masochist right??

He says the most disrespectful shit to you and you just squeal in excitement from it.

It's starting to weird him out.

Everything he does or say, you love to mock him, like he could be giving orders and you'd be at the back using your hands to mimic his talking like a puppet as you mouthed along and made faces.

But he has to say, he finds your insanity amusing. Because deep down, he sees a tiny bit of himself in you.

He calls you Looney Tunes. Why exactly? Nobody knows its for his own entertainment.

He's into older women but that doesn't stop you from flirting with him. He finds your efforts interesting.

"You're a tough nut to crack, Soldier Boy, but I'll get you to crack a smile eventually" You'd say and it'll be enough to have him grinning at you.

"You gonna tickle me?" He'd say, returning the same energy.

But that doesn't mean he's interested in you, he's just toying with you.

AND YOU KNOW IT. But apparently red flags just look like a go flag to you 🤷‍♀️

Despite that, if any other guy did the things he did to you, he would be fast to knock out the fucker. That's because he knows you value loyalty and he does too.

Everything aside, he really appreciates it when at the end where everybody turned against him you stayed by his side. Just imagine him driving the car while you're in the passenger seat singing your heart out to Cherry Bomb by The Runaways.

He'd simply shake his head with a smile on his face.

But the more relationship develops, he'd actually start to show you his softer side. Not soft side. Soft-er side.

Will literally lecture you into standing up more for yourself and stop being a doormat for every man in your life.

How ironic huh?

"You might act all tough and macho, but I see that big, marshmallow heart under there, sweetheart" You'd boop him on the nose that has him rolling his eyes with a smirk.

"You already said that. Are you a broken record or just dim?" He said.

If you stay obedient and don't push the wrong buttons, he might just keep you around.

[stevieschrodinger]

Part One Part Six

Steve wakes with a start, yelping and then immediately panicking when the bed covers feel constricting – it passes almost immediately when he realizes where he is and what woke him.

“Hi Eddie,” Steve sighs, blinking the rest of the way awake. He rubs at his crusty eyes, the bedside clock glowing three forty seven at him. Great. “What’s up buddy?”

“Stee,” Eddie says quietly, like he somehow understands the sanctity of the middle of the night, “ow. Dead later,” and then he makes a noise like a fly buzzing. Or a bee. It’s a fair attempt at a gentle ‘bzzzz’ing noise.

Steve sighs, “okay buddy lets go.”

Eddie turns at the top of the stairs and goes down them on his butt, which Steve’s pretty sure he would find amusing if he wasn’t half asleep and half annoyed.

The ground outside is cold enough that Steve hisses when his bare foot hits it, and he does a silly hopping jog to follow Eddie onto the lawn. It is a bee, and it’s moving sluggish and confused on the grass. The weathers getting colder, the time of year plus...probably it’s old?

Steve knows fuck all about bees, but he’s pretty sure individual bees don’t live for that long, and that maybe they sort of hibernate in the winter? Or something? Isn’t that what all of that honey is for?

Maybe they could bring it into the warm and give it some sugar water or something, Steve’s pretty sure he’s heard that from someone, somewhere along the line, “okay little bee guy, here we go.” Steve uses a finger to encourage the fuzzy bee onto his hand.

Steve stands; there’s very faint, and probably first of the year, patches of frost on Eddie’s tent. It hasn’t formed anywhere else, so it’s probably not that bad yet, but still, it’s chilly enough that Steve hops back across the lawn with some urgency.

In the kitchen, Steve says, “here Eddie, you take him,” and transfers the bee into Eddie’s cupped hands. He mixes a tiny mount of sugar water in the bottom of a glass, with no idea at all if it’ll help or not. The bee should probably be asleep, right? Steve can’t remember ever seeing a bee at night, so he assumes they go to bed like sensible bees.

Steve drops a tiny bit of the sugary mixture onto Eddie’s palm, right in front of the bee’s face; he drinks it, so Steve does it again. “Okay, I think we should all try and get some sleep. Eddie, you want to sleep on the couch?”

“Sleep on the couch.”

“Yeah,” Steve rubs his arms, making ‘brrrr’ing noises and generally pretending he’s in arctic conditions. He points to the door, “cold outside. Warm here.”

Eddie cocks his head, but seems to get it, so Steve takes the bee, setting it dead center on a couch cushion, and goes back to bed.

Steve wakes again at a much more normal time; blinking at the nine thirty now on his clock and thinking that is way, way better. He wonders vaguely if the bee lived, but he doubts it. Eddie will probably be sad about it; like the bird.

If that was even sadness; if Eddie even understands the concept of death. Steve has no way to know what Eddie thinks about it.

He heads downstairs; vaguely planning his day. He needs a coffee and some breakfast, then get ready; they probably need some groceries. Working opposite shifts to Robin really sucks; he hasn’t seen her once yet this week. They talk on the phone though, and she swears she's working on Keith. He should check when he goes in later for a day they both have off so they can hang out; if such a thing even exists.

Maybe the kids will come over for a movie night; Steve does now have unfettered access to all the newest releases...and is it sad that Steve’s lonely enough that he wants to invite over that bunch of mongrels? Maybe, he’s not going to think to much about it.

Steve sets the coffee going then heads into the lounge; Eddie’s curled up into a tight ball, his spine bent at a really fucking weird angle and his tail wrapped around himself; Steve knows then that he’s never seen Eddie sleep before, because he’s definitely never seen whatever the hell is happening here. It’s like a cat. Or a snake, maybe. The way he’s all curled up tight on himself; makes Steve’s back hurt just looking at him.

At the other end of the couch is the sad, still, little body of the bee. Steve stares at it, listening to the faint noise from the kitchen; the coffee pot gurgles a little.

Eddie blinks awake, unwrapping himself.

“Morning Eddie.”

“Morning Stee,” Eddie blinks sadly at the bee, and then, very gently, leans over and nudges it with a claw tip, “dead?”

“Yeah buddy, I’m sorry. But at least he was comfortable, right? Warm and...sugared up.”

Eddie hums noncommittally, watching as Steve scoops up the bee and following him into the kitchen. Steve very nearly puts the bee in the trash can, but veers off at the last moment. It feels a little wrong, throwing the little dude out; he also doesn’t know what Eddie would thinks and feels vaguely like Eddie might...judge him.

Steve heads outside and deposits him in a plant pot instead. When he comes back in, Eddie’s raiding the fridge, “pear inied. Grapes inied. Celery inied.”

Steve sighs, “I know buddy, I’m sorry. I’ll go and get more, okay?” Steve goes out to the freezer in the garage and comes back with a whole bag of frozen peas, and that seems to completely make up for it. He pours Eddie a bowl of peas, and himself a bowl of cereal, sticking a spoon in both. He downs the coffee so he doesn’t have to make two trips.

“Couch, TV?”

Eddie nods, following Steve. Eddie turns on the TV since Steve’s hands are full, and they sit side by side on the couch, Eddie very carefully using his spoon.

“Called?”

“It’s a toothbrush.”

Eddie watches from his seat on the floor next to Steve; he’s high enough to easily lean his elbows on the counter top.

“Why?”

And ‘called?’ Steve can handle all day long, but ‘why?’ has rapidly become a tricky thing to navigate.

“To clean.” Steve grins big as he can, clicking his teeth together, “teeth.”

“Teeth,” Eddie snaps back, then turns to the mirror, clicking his teeth at himself. “Eddidie clean teeth?”

Steve snorts a laugh, and Eddie looks at him, tilting his head but smiling too. Steve figures that a solid ninety five percent of the time, Eddie’s just happy to be involved.

“Okay buddy I think I have…” Steve rummages in the cupboard under the sink, “ah ha!”

“Ah ha!”

“Here you go,” Steve unwraps the new toothbrush, really, really fucking glad it’s a different color to his own. “Steve’s is blue, Eddie’s is purple.”

“Purple.”

“You got it buddy,” Steve wets the bristles of both, and then puts the tiniest little dab of toothpaste on Eddie’s before putting the proper amount on his own.

“Here you go.” Steve hands it over, and then Starts brushing his teeth. Eddie holds his own brush, watching Steve closely in the mirror before attempting it himself. His movements are slow and cautious, be he definitely gets the idea.

Steve rinses his brush under the water, leaving it running as Eddie does the same. Eddie has no trouble dropping his toothbrush into the cup next to Steve’s.

Eddie explores the bath next; all this shit must have been here when Eddie spent a night in the tub, but Steve was beaten to hell and still a little fucking high on Russian truth serum when all that was going on, so he honestly doesn’t really remember much of those first couple of days. “Called?”

“Shampoo. It’s to clean hair,” Steve tugs on his hair to demonstrate, “hair.”

“Eddidie clean hair?”

“Uh. I mean, if you want to?”

Eddie gets the cap open, squeezing the bottle carefully and sniffing the hole, “good.”

Steve’s current shampoo smells like apples, and Steve realizes what’s going to happen just as it’s too late to stop Eddie from sticking his tongue out.

Eddie smacks his lips together, looking truly disgusted, “fucking gross.”

“Hey! Language!” Steve takes the bottle from a grinning Eddie. He looks so pleased with himself Steve can’t stay mad, “damn kids,” he sighs. Eddie definitely got that one from Max, the little reprobate. “Okay, if we’re going to do this, in the tub.”

Eddie points, “in?”

“Yup.”

Eddie manages it, hoisting himself up and the flicking his tail and sliding his ass over the edge, “Eddidie in tub.”

“You got it buddy,” Steve takes the shower head down, pointing it away from Eddie while it warms up, then moving it a little onto his tail, “feel okay?”

“Warm,” Eddie reaches out to feel the water, “good.”

“Okay, here we go then.”

Eddie sits patiently, head tilted back as Steve wets his hair down and then adds the shampoo. Eddie’s hair is thick, like, insanely thick, and it takes a bit for Steve to work the lather in. The individual strands are thick too, coarse and a little wiry. The back of Eddie’s scalp feels strange too, like his skull had ridges on it; lines that all join together right at the back of Eddie’s head. You’d never be able to see it through his hair.

Steve goes through half a bottle of conditioner on him, but Eddie sits patiently through all of it, flicking his fingers through the water, even when Steve combs it through and catches on snags, Eddie’s doesn’t complain at all. He tilts his head back easily when Steve directs him to, “okay, nearly finished.”

Once they’re done, Eddie climbs out of the bath and onto a towel, sitting on the floor while Steve dries his hair; he gets the idea and dries his arms and torso himself. Steve’s so used to looking at him that he doesn’t find the lack of belly button and nipples at all odd any more. Just looks normal. Looks like Eddie.

“Okay buddy, just let me grab a shower, and then you can help me write a grocery list,” Eddie follows Steve into the bedroom, watching as Steve grabs clothes before heading for his shower. Steve clicks the lock on just in case; Eddie’s not exactly worked out stuff like boundaries or personal space yet.

When Steve comes out, Eddie’s waiting patiently, sitting on the edge of Steve’s bed, wearing his yellow sweater.

Part Eight

[woso-dreamzzz]

Secret II

Mapi Leon x Ingrid Engen x Child!Reader

Summary: You come to training

Ingrid will forever remember the look of shock on everyone's face when she walks into the locker room with you on her hip.

They all wear varying looks of shock on their faces as Ingrid waltzes in, refusing to act like anything is out of the ordinary.

Your head swivels around as you take in everyone looking at you before you grunt.

Ingrid knows that sound well as she places you on the floor, taking that god-awful ladybug toy out of her bag. You slam your hand on the button and it starts singing its jolly tune, the sound echoing around the otherwise silent locker room.

You clap your hands in amusement as Ingrid turns around to change.

"So you finally brought her then?" Frido teases and Ingrid rolls her eyes.

"I was convinced."

She looks meaningfully to where you've now been joined by Mapi on the floor. The Spaniard has no qualms about sitting with you, oohing awwing over your toy as you babble at her.

She nods along like you've imparted the truth of the world onto her and she presses the button on your ladybug when it stops again.

"Really?" She coos at you," That's so interesting! You're so smart!"

The rest of the locker room is completely silent until Jenni speaks.

"I think I speak for everyone when I say...What the hell?!"

"It's a baby," Mapi says before Ingrid can speak," Isn't she cute?" She lifts you up under your armpits. You sag in her arms like baby Simba as Mapi proudly presents you to the others. "She's so cool. She can push buttons all by herself!"

Frido laughs. "I think lots of babies can do that, Mapi. Ingrid's Skatt isn't special."

"Don't say that!" Mapi gasps," You can hurt her self-esteem!" She turns you around so she can look at you. "You're very smart! So, so smart! Pushing buttons and singing all by yourself!"

Ingrid's made peace with the fact that she's probably not getting you back this entire training session. She thinks the coaches have also made peace with the fact that there will be no training being done either.

This training session has been highjacked by you and Mapi. Even the more standoffish girls have been won over by you.

Frido isn't much help either, constantly bringing up things like she had known you for years and not the five months you had been alive.

"Show them the bumblebee outfit! Show them the bumblebee!" Frido cajoles as everyone sits in the shade together on the pitch. "Come on, Ingrid! She looks so cute as a bee!"

You're sat happily in Mapi's lap as Jana and Bruna coo over you. You're particularly interested in the fact that they have fingers, tugging and pulling on them before forcing them to touch the button on your ladybug.

"Bumblebee?" The words catch Mapi's attention who sits up fully as Ingrid goes through her camera roll.

"My mother sent it when she was still little."

She flips the phone around so everyone can see you wearing your special bumblebee sleep suit. You look completely peaceful in the picture and Ingrid scrolls along to show you dressed as a spider and an ant.

"This is the most recent one."

It's you sitting in front of your ladybug, dressed like a ladybug too. You've got your fingers in your mouth and you're staring at your toy with such concentration that it's kind of funny.

"She's adorable," Irene coos," My wife is pregnant. I know it is different but...the club...they are good with you needing to be with her?"

"They pay for her babysitter," Ingrid replies," They're perfectly happy with her. Isn't that right, skatt?"

You turn your head to look at her at the call of your nickname. You stare for a moment before grunting and going back to clapping along to your ladybug.

"She seems very smart. She knows her name," Marta continues.

"Ingrid's got her trained," Frido teases," She whistles and Skatt stops exactly what she's doing to listen. She likes a little dog."

Ingrid swats at her. "Stop calling my daughter a dog."

"Yeah, Frido," Mapi butts in," You're going to ruin her self-esteem."

"I don't think you'll let anyone do that. Is Ingrid getting her kid back or are you keeping her forever?"

Mapi shrugs. "I don't mind keeping this little cutie. She and Ingrid can move into my place. I'll take good care of you, skatt. Yes, I will."

Alexia rolls her eyes. "I think you need to prove you can take care of yourself first, Mapi."

"That's why Ingrid's moving in too, obviously. I can't separate this little beauty from her mama. That would make her sad!"

"Sure," Ingrid hears Leila mutter," That's the reason you want Ingrid to move in."

You whine a little as your ladybug stops singing and Ingrid instantly knows what that means.

"Give her here," She says," Someone needs a nap."

You're passed from Mapi to Ingrid and you conk out fast asleep on her chest almost as soon as you're settled there. Your soft puffs of breath tickle Ingrid's collarbone and she gently runs her fingers through your soft, downy hair.

"Oh!" Mapi says.

Her cheeks go a little red as she digs around in her bag.

"I know she likes ladybugs and I'm sorry if this oversteps boundaries or anything but here. For Skatt."

Ingrid tucks the little ladybug plushie under your arms and you instantly curl into it.

"It's beautiful, Mapi," Ingrid says, pressing a soft kiss to Mapi's bright red cheek," Thank you for thinking of her."

[astralnymphh]

im scared cus this is my first req buttttt.. ellie fucking u w a breeding strap but keep stopping to watch the fake cum ooze out and make her dirty comments 🫣

+bonus ugh it would be so hot if she made u suck it first then gave u a facial!!! or she gets carried away n it gets ALL OVER u (and in u lollll) like back thighs face UGH I NEED TO BE STOPPED

apologies for taking FOREVER but omg ELLIE GIVING YOU A FACIAL. lemme expand on this. MDNI. 𐙚

𐙚 ellie gives you a facial

"yeah–ha? too big for you?" she cooed in that conceited tone, the one she curls and swirls whensoever you can't take her in sheer size, hence now. a tone that ensues to badger you, inflame you, to thrust your throat faster. you bob your head, like all hell you bob with might– shaking fingertips pressing gently into her soft, pliable butt, inching her in further. her silicone cock, it's veiny shaft scrapes in tiny grooves along your gullet walls, puncturing the very depths with a brazen cockhead so feckly– you gag. a series of 'uuaghhs' and 'bhhhmms' that buzz like a bee on her dick ellie could only hope to phantom feel. cold, webby spit is all your taste buds could swill, a bland taste in frothy soaks. her cockhead presses against your inner–most gullet wall– uvula if you want terms, the bulbous mass getting you to gag once more, akin to thrusts and thrusts hence. you spit, detaching your pouty wet buds, "guuhh–ah, ack!" and tightropes of beady sap–like consistency leashes from your lips to your throat, laying like strings of spaghetti over the plush of your bottom lip. ellie giggles with smuggish pique, cooing at you more, "hehe– fuck babe, makin' me wanna fuck your pretty mouth.. ohh~" her brows pinch in rumination of that appealing enigma, to fuck your throat. you raise, throat clearing roughly, "I've been sucking it for minutes now, is it not go–" she cuts you off, large palm swinging around your head to tangle knuckles to knots in your locks, "scuse' me, m'not finished yet–" she slams your caving mouth over her cock, sheathing it wholly, "–that's why." she replies with wit staining that voice. goddess damn it. pump, pump, pump– the more your hair tousled, the harsher her pumps glide. those dauntingly sexy hips you cradle in two measly grasps fuck into your slobbering gob like there's no tomorrow. wetness amalgamates in bubbly drops in the pit of your lap, sweat cakes on your tense forehead, and your gags remain punted back by the force of her cocktip seeking a gushy release in harsh strokes. moans echo, they rattle your skull, flowing much like grunts of bestial nature– grizzling out of her lungs. "unhhh– yeahhh baby, take me in there, take me in– mghhh." it's ruthless, yet ruthlessly hot, not a big feat for ellie though– she has no qualms when it comes to being effortlessly hot. one tightly drawn squeal with grit, and she's cumming– everywhere. no use paying a cell of your mind to focus on the rivers of clear cum that trickle from her engorged pussy lips, because inversely, her stinging grip tugs your head off and slinks over to grab taut hold on her girth, oozing out all that delectable– pearly white serum all over your face. it saults beyond your brow ridge, groups of globs beelining for your chin. snail trails of sticky glue emissions paint you like an abstract canvas, dripping with strings onto your chest and your belly– and your thighs. ergo, everywhere. ellie continues to aim her cock in patterns, purposefully smothering you with her gloopy release– cause fuuck was it lewd to see you glossed like a glazed donut. a stifled, "cummin' all over that pretty face, yeah– take that." gusts through the tight gaps of her teeth, living as the only sound to overrun the squelching of her sleek bulging out of that cocks' tiny little hole. a final bead purls from the hole, diving straight for the tip of your nose. her grasp given, she loosens up, slinking a curved finger over to smear any leftover cum over her cock's size. giggling like a dork, in rasp, "oh god," fakely gasped, "she cum all over you? shit babe–" you scowl in feign at her, pursing brows, "you clearly intended to do that." you snap, to which she replies dumbly, muttering, "mh– noo, just lose control of 'er, fuckin' hot though right?" her thumb presses a dent in the rubbery thickness, slapping the cock down on your coiling lips. you giggle, "really fucking hot." with intentional foxiness pitching your words, thereafter flattening your tongue out for her to slap on– which she does, bouncing her pretty cock on your pretty tongue. ౨ৎ

ellie definitely enjoys this, too much.

will orbly write a fucking u w a breeding strap another day lol. gotta finish this fic!!

[somethinginthewayiam]

The girl behind the bar (Part 4.1)

pairing: Jake Hangman Seresin x plus-size reader

warnings: self-doubt, bad self-body image

words: 3.3k

Summary: The bar is closed for some spring cleaning outside on the deck. At the same time, the navy pilots played some football on the beach in an attempt for some team-building exercise. After a while, Penny asked you to take her dog Theo for a walk on the beach...

Link to my masterlist

It was the day the bar was closed and therefore your day off, but you were at the Hard Deck anyway because Penny asked you to help with some sort of a spring cleaning of the bar, including the deck outside and washing all the big windows at the beachfront. Penny was taking care of the windows as you and Jimmy set up all the deck chairs, cleaning them off with a high-pressure cleaner. Penny’s dog Theo was running around you guys, having the time of his life running off with the sponge or chasing the water Penny was spritzing into the air.

It was the middle of the afternoon, the sun starting to fall after its noon peak, when you were done and Jimmy had taken off. Penny was sitting outside on the deck, going over the books. She had told you that you could also leave when Jimmy left but what else were you going to do?

All the people you knew in town were either at this bar or on the beach as the naval aviators were playing football with Maverick. Apparently, some sort of a team-building exercise for their mission training.

They had placed their belongings at the bar before wandering off onto the beach in their swimming trunks and sport outfits. You were in the middle of drying off the last deck chair as your eyes kept wandering over to the group. All men including Maverick were playing without a shirt on, except for Bob. The two women in the squad were wearing shorts and sports bras.

Your eyes were wandering to Hangman who was totally ripped and his upper body was glistening with sweat. Fuck, he looked good. Actually, everybody did. From Rooster to Coyote to Maverick, everybody was sporting a muscley, toned physique that apparently was mandatory by the Navy.

When you looked over at Penny, you caught her admiring the group in the same way you did, although her eyes were clearly set on Maverick. Her stare was interrupted when Theo jumped up and tried to grab the pen from her hands with his mouth. “Hey, no!”, she called out and motioned him to sit but he wiggled around like he had bees in his butt.

“Y/N, would you mind taking Theo for a little walk on the beach? Maybe throw the ball? I need to finish this here”, Penny asked you, pointing at the books in front of her. “Sure, I’m done here anyway”, you told her and threw the towel into the bucket. You wiped your hands on your shorts and kicked off your shoes.

You re-did your ponytail and grabbed the ball from the table where Penny had placed it earlier. “Thank you”, she said before you walked off the deck and called Theo, who followed you with a wiggling tail.

You had actually planned to go to the beach after work since you’ve never been since you moved here and it was a hot day. But after seeing the guys and gals playing football, everybody super fit and tanned and gorgeous, the urge to take your own clothes off had fallen to a negative one hundred. It made you feel even weirder that you were already wearing your bathing suit underneath your shorts and tank top.

You walked down the little pathway onto the sandy beach, walking towards the water and the group. “Hey Mav”, you said as you arrived at a beach chair that Mav has sat down in while you were walking down here.

“Hey Y/N! Up for a round of dogfight football?”, Mav asked you, looking up from his chair. You shielded your eyes from the low sun and watched the two groups charge at each other. “No thanks, I let you Navy guys do that. But I could go for a round of volleyball”, you suggested. “I got no ball with me, but that sounds like a good idea. Imma hold you to it”, he offered. “You got it”, you agreed with a smile and he gave you a fist bump.

“Are you done for the day?”, you asked, still watching the guys running around on the beach, celebrating when they scored a touchdown. They actually looked more like a team than they did all the times before when you saw them at the bar. You could only imagine what it was like at base camp as you had actually no idea what they did all day.

“Ah, yeah. I’ll leave the kids to play”, he said and started patting Theo, playing with him as Theo tried to catch Maverick’s finger he was wiggling in front of the dog’s face. “Are you done working, too?”, he asked you. “Yes, Penny asked me to distract this little guy so she can take care of the books”, you told him and he nodded. “But I’m sure she can use a break as well”, you added with a smirk on your lips. Mav looked over his shoulder towards the Hard Deck. “You think?”, he asked as he turned around again. “Oh, I’m sure”, you nodded encouragingly.

“Come on, Theo. Let’s throw that ball”, you said to your furry friend and wiggled the ball in front of his face to get his attention. You walked a few feet away from the group as to not get in their space before you started throwing the ball for Theo. Every time you threw it, Theo took a detour through the incoming waves. No matter how far away you managed to throw it from the ocean, he always splashed in the water before he came back to you. And whenever he came back with the ball, he shook his fur free from the water right in front of you, splashing you from top to bottom.

“Dude, I’m so wet because of you”, you said to him as he did another shake in front of you after dropping the ball by your feet. “A sentence Bob will never hear”, you heard Hangman’s voice next to you as he got the football that had landed close to you.

“Are you being a good boy and retrieving the ball for Maverick?”, you asked as you bent down to grab Theo’s ball and stood up again. “You got the good boy part right”, he said with a wink. Despite your better judgement, you giggled at his comment instead of your usual eyeroll and it surprised the both of you, which you saw at the expression on his face.

“Y/N!”, you suddenly heard behind you and the next moment, two strong arms wrapped around you from behind, beginning to lift you upwards. “Ahhh”, you let out a loud squeal and your body got all stiff. “No! Let me down!”, you demanded but tried to keep the sound of your voice light and friendly, even though you hated nothing more than to be lifted in the air.

Not because you actually hated to be up there but because you believed to be too heavy to be lifted by anybody and that when the person actually struggles to lift you or actually straight up can’t, it’s only gonna be embarrassing for the both of you.

Only when you turned around as you felt the sandy beach beneath your feet again, you found Rooster to be the person that tried to lift you. He was only wearing his jeans shorts (bold choice) and his upper body was glistening with sweat, just like all the others that started gathering around you. Fanboy took the ball from your hand and started throwing it for Theo.

“Are you guys done playing?”, you asked and shielded your eyes from the low sun. “Yeah, we’re absolutely roasted”, Fanboy told you, sounding out of breath. “Let’s all take a dip in the ocean”, Payback suggested. “Yeah, let’s do that”, Rooster agreed. “You coming, too?”, he asked you. “Oh, no, you guys go ahead. I got the little guy here”, you told him and pointed at Theo who was just bringing the ball back to Fanboy.

“Just send him back up to Penny, he knows the way”, Rooster suggested. “If you want to change, we can wait for you”, Phoenix offered. “Or go in your underwear, we don’t mind”, Fanboy mentioned. “Thank you, Fanboy, but I’m actually already wearing my bathing suit”, you told them and lifted the hem of your shirt to show off the black fabric.

“Okay, then it’s settled. Let’s go”, Rooster said and patted your back. You contemplated for a moment. You were hot and sweaty from your work and you had planned on going into the ocean for a swim anyways. A sudden inner defiance against your own insecurities about your body and its size had you finally giving in.

“Alright, but let me put my clothes by the chair”, you told them and started walking over to said chair, taking Theo with you. When you came closer, you noticed that Maverick was gone. When you looked towards the Hard Deck, you found him talking to Penny, sitting across from her.

You put the ball gently into Theo’s mouth and told him to go to his owner, which he actually understood and you watched him run up the path towards Penny, dropping the ball by her feet. That made her advert her eyes from Maverick and look at her little companion. She grabbed the ball and looked down onto the beach where she found you waving. She waved back and gave you a thumbs up.

The others had followed you and started to take off their clothes, revealing some swim shorts beneath their regular pants.

At first, you didn’t want to undress in front of them, but then you thought that there was no comparison between them and you anyway, you were playing in different leagues, well, technically you’re not competing as you didn’t even play the same sport. Figuratively AND literally.

You unzipped your shorts and pushed them down your legs before you pulled your shirt over your head, revealing a one-piece bathing suit with cut-outs on the side, just low enough to hide the rolls on your back, but also high enough to show your smaller waist which you were actually quite proud of.

You laid out your clothes so they could dry while you were taking a dip. As the others were quicker than you, they already headed for the waves.

As you got up, you reached inside the bra portion of your bathing suit and rearranged your boobs to fit better. You had the bathing suit for a little while and it got a bit snug around certain parts but it was still the best bathing suit you had ever owned, so you would never throw it out.

When you turned around, you locked eyes with Bob, who was sitting there in his shirt and shorts, applying sunscreen on his arms, while your hand was still in your bra. “Just sorting out the girls”, you said and let out a little embarrassed chuckle. You quickly pulled your hand out and put your hands on your hips as you suddenly didn’t know what to do with them.

“Are you not going swimming?”, you asked. “No, I rather sit this one out, thanks”, he said and you immediately recognized the shyness that came with the unwillingness to take off your own shirt in front of other people. “I bet after such an intense game, a dip in the ocean must be quite nice”, you said and tried to make it sound super random.

“Yeah, probably”, he just shrugged his shoulders. He was a hard one to crack but you knew from personal experience how that felt. “You can just go in with your shirt on, you know?”, you suggested. “Yeah, like that wouldn’t look super awkward”, he scoffed and looked out at the ocean where the guys and girls already swam, dipping each other under the water and splashing around.

“I can put my shirt back on as well, then we’re already two”, you offered. “But you just sorted out the girls”, he said. His comment was so dry that it took you a good moment to recognize the joke within.

“Look who got some jokes now”, you chuckled and nudged his shoulder. A shy smile appeared on his lips and he looked down at the bottle of sunscreen in his hands.

“Listen, if I was able to take off my shirt, then definitely you can, too”, you told him. “Easy for you to say”, he responded and was hinting at something obvious, but it just wasn’t obvious to you. Didn’t he know that for girls it was always harder to undress in public, especially for girls with a body like yours?

“Hey, would it help if I go without my top on as well?”, you suggested as a joke, your thumb under the strap of your bathing suit. “Yeah, immensely”, he immediately answered. “And for that you have to go swimming with me now”, you told him off with your index finger pointed at him. Then you extended your hand and pulled him up when he finally took it. Together, you walked towards the ocean.

“Y/N!”, Rooster called out as soon as he saw you. He was halfway out of the water and came straight towards you. “NO!”, you immediately said and held out your hand in front of you. “Not again!”, you added as he sped up. You started walking to the side, speeding up as best as you could. When you saw him starting to run, you tried to play along and also run away from him, but you knew that you and cardio weren’t the best of friends and also this would end in the water anyway. And before you would alarm everybody with a bright, red face and a whistling tone while you tried to breathe, you started to run towards the water.

Rooster was behind you in no time, wrapped his arms around you again and managed to cover exactly the cut-outs of your bathing suit. Even though you knew what was coming, the sudden skin-on-skin contact threw you off a little bit and Rooster used the irritation to pick you up and carry you the few steps into deeper water before he threw you in.

You were actually glad about the cool-down the water provided you with. Normally, you were not surrounded by so many good-looking people in so little clothing and it got to you a little bit. Your last time has been way too long ago. Way, way too long.

“Why do you guys always have to be so rough?”, you said after coming back up to the surface, spitting out the water and rubbing your eyes, a salty taste in your mouth. “Some girls like it rough”, Coyote commented with a sleezy laugh, bobbing in the water behind you. “Yeah, well there’s a place and a time. Like the bedroom or the backseat of a Bronco”, you said out loud before you could think. “She’s not wrong”, Rooster agreed and got a dreamy expression on his face. Only now you realized that he was actually driving a Bronco and probably had some good times in there other than a few fun road trips.

When you looked back to the beach, you found Bob standing there. “Hey!”, you exclaimed and waved at him to come into the water. “You don’t think I’ll actually do it, huh?”, you shouted towards him. “Do what?”, Fanboy asked. “I told him I’ll take my top off if he does as well and comes into the water”, you told him. “BOB, GET THAT SHIRT OFF AND YOU DAMN ASS OVER HERE!”, Fanboy screamed towards the beach and some of the other guys screamed Bob’s name as well and motioned him to get into the water. “Come on, Bob!”, Phoenix called out towards her teammate and back-seater.

When he finally took off his shirt and came into the water, everybody cheered. “Alright, your turn”, he said to you when he arrived at the group that were all bobbing in the water together. “Stop being such horny teenagers. I already took my top off, it’s drying over there in the sun”, you told them and nodded towards your clothes on the beach.

“If you’ll excuse me now, I’m gonna actually swim for a little bit”, you said and as you turned around in the water to start swimming away from the group, you almost crashed into Hangman. You hadn’t noticed him there before. Out of surprise, you put your hands on his chest under the water just to brace yourself. Your fingertips sank into his skin for a split second and you felt his body heat on your palms under the water.

“Sorry”, you just mumbled and noticed that you sounded a bit breathless. “All good”, he simply said.

You swam around him, his eyes following you, and made sure to swim out for a few strokes to get some space between you and Hangman. It embarrassed you how that little moment just threw you off, feeling your cheeks burning up. You dismissed it as the exertion from swimming against the incoming waves.

You swam back and forth for a little bit, trying not to go out too far and when your arms felt tired, you lay on your back, floating on the water and feeling the last rays of sunshine of the day on your face.

You let your mind wander a bit and you started to think about the new friends you had made over the past weeks. It all felt a bit weird. It seemed like the guys were flirting with you, but you also made fun of each other. You never really had guy friends and didn’t know how to categorize all the interactions. You just filed everything under “friendly hazing”. Because there was no other side to it…right?

“Y/N!”, you suddenly heard Phoenix call out your name. You swam upright again and looked towards the shore. She waved you to swim back to the beach as everybody was ready to get out.

Phoenix and Halo, the other woman in the squad, were waiting for you, handing you your clothes. The guys were already back at the Hard Deck, putting their shirts back on.

“Hey, Y/N, Penny said we could stay at the bar for a few hours if you promise to take our money and clean up afterwards”, Coyote told you as you arrived on the deck of the bar. You walked over to your bag and grabbed the big beach towel you had brought with you and wrapped it around your body. You suddenly felt very under-dressed with so many people around you.

You looked at Penny, who seemed to be ready to drive off with Maverick, who was wearing his leather jacket, and had Theo on his leash. She gave you a little nod, letting you know that she was actually okay with Coyote’s suggestion.

You shrugged your shoulders. “Okay, I’ll do that”, you agreed and then turned to Coyote. “If you don’t make such a mess in the first place”, you admonished him and pointed a finger of warning at him. “Scouts honors”, he promised and held up his right hand.

Penny, Mav and Theo left and you got inside with everybody. “I’ll go change”, you told Phoenix and took your bag into the women’s restroom. You changed from your wet bathing suit into the underwear you had brought with you and rubbed your hair somewhat dry before you changed back into your shorts and a fresh black tank top. You looked at your face in the mirror. You regretted that you didn’t have any make-up on you, simple mascara or something, but you really hadn’t expected to be spending your evening with the group.

You came back out and stored your bag under the bar counter.

“Who’s ready for the first round?”.

Next chapter: Part 4.2

[idyllic-ghost]

Hi Bee! I've been thinking about Jeonghan too much recently- and then I read your Minghao getting sick with reader fic and I just... Tell me Jeonghan wouldn't be wo whiny while being sick😭 Could you write something about Jeonghan being sick and making a big fuzz about reader needing to take care of him?

Can't wait for the Mingyu fic!💜

title: sick-day soup pairing: jeonghan x reader genre: fluff warnings: discussions of sickness (cold), mentions of food wordcount: 1.7k taglist:@enhacolor, @shuabby1994, @junhui-recs, @dkakapizzaboy, @just-here-to-read-01, @loviehan, @userjunhuii, @novalpha, @bubblymoon, @aaniag

a/n: this was so nice to write!!

join my taglist

masterlists

send a request in my inbox!

✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦

The buzzing of your phone on your nightstand woke you up. It was pitch dark except for the blue light from the device - lighting up a small space around it. With an annoyed sigh, you picked it up and looked at the caller ID. Hannie. A name that you so lovingly called out every time you got to see him. A name that you now wanted to curse. You had barely heard from him all day and had the gall to call you at two in the morning. Hesitating for just a second, you eventually picked up - hoping for his sake that it was just a butt dial.

"What?" you croaked.

"Baby..." Jeonghan whined, his voice was hoarse. "I know it's late, I'm sorry... but can you come over?"

"I'm not going to come over at two in the morning to have sex with you." You groaned and put your arm over your eyes as if you could shield yourself from the rest of the world that way.

"Y/N, I'm sick." He coughed to emphasize his words. "I need your help."

"My help? How?"

"Soup..."

You guffawed, sitting up in your bed. Even when he annoyed you, Jeonghan could still make you smile. It somehow made you even more annoyed.

"You want me to make you soup?"

"I have the ingredients, just not the energy." He cleared his throat. "I know I've barely talked to you all day, and I'm sorry... I woke up with this awful cold, I've barely been out of bed all day."

You couldn't help but feel sorry for him. Putting your head in your hand that wasn't holding your phone to your ear, you sighed. Were you about to give in to him once again? Yes.

"I'll be over in a few minutes..."

Unlocking the door with the key Jeonghan had given you some time ago, you walked into the dark apartment. The only light was coming from the kitchen, where a cloaked figure was sitting on one of the chairs by the small dining table. When you closed the door, the sound of the click made the figure turn towards you. Under the dark blanket, Jeonghan's face stuck out. Even from the low light from the ceiling lamp, you could see that he looked sick. In the time it had taken you to kick off your shoes and take off your jacket, Jeonghan had approached you. With the blanket still over his arms, he engulfed you in a hug - wrapping you up in the blanket as well.

"Thank you for coming," he mumbled into your ear.

"You owe me," you hummed as you patted his back.

"I know." Jeonghan pulled away from you.

"So, what kind of soup have you been trying to make?" You walked around him to get to his kitchen, Jeonghan staying close behind you.

"Just chicken and veggie soup," he said. "I had all the things for it in my fridge, but-"

"No energy." You nodded.

Jeonghan had pulled out a few things from his fridge; vegetables, chicken, and broth. You pulled up your sleeves and went over to the sink to wash your hands. While you were turning the nozzles on, Jeonghan came up behind you and wrapped his arms around your mid-section.

"Thank you, baby." He nuzzled his head into the crook of your neck.

"Just go rest, Hannie," you muttered. "I'll bring you a bowl when it's ready."

Despite your command, Jeonghan stayed. You didn't tell him to leave, he had made his choice, but as you kept working you found that you didn't mind. Sometimes he stood in a corner, giving you space to cook the chicken and chop the vegetables. However, when you were simply stirring the soup he came up to you. Just like before, he wrapped his arms around your mid-section and buried his head in the crook of your neck.

"Why didn't you tell me you were sick?" you asked.

"I didn't want to bother you," he murmured.

"Asking for help isn't a bother," you said, "unless it's two in the morning, then it's a little different."

"... I'm sorry."

You turned your head over your shoulder, looking at your sick boyfriend with a frown. Usually, he'd joke with you - competing over who could be more sarcastic - but now he was apologetic. He must have been more sick than you thought.

"Hannie, I'm joking," you deadpanned.

"Oh..." He cleared his throat. "You can't joke with me like that when I'm sick. My brain isn't working well."

You scoffed at his whining, going back to stirring the soup until the noodles had softened. Getting loose from his grip, you walked over to his cabinets and got out two bowls. Jeonghan went over to sit by the dining table, and you followed him to put the bowls there. You went back and forth between the table and the cabinets, setting everything up to have a nice meal. Once everything was done, you brought over the pot. Jeonghan clapped his hands slowly under his blanket, his eyes fixated on the soup.

"You really wanted soup, huh?" You picked up his bowl and poured some soup into it with a ladle.

"I've been surviving on whatever leftovers I had in the fridge, and a few ice creams," he explained. "And that's only when I felt like actually getting out of bed."

"Jeonghan..." You sighed. "You really should have called me. I would've helped."

He played around with the spoon in his bowl before bringing the hot soup up to his lips. Hissing at the burn against his lips, he quickly put the spoon down.

"Blow on it first," you warned.

Jeonghan pouted, picking up the spoon again and holding it with the handle towards you - silently asking you to take it. With a sigh, you sat down. You couldn't resist his pout. After pulling the chair closer to him, you take the spoon from his hand and put the spoon in the soup. Sinking the spoon under the surface of the liquid, you watched as it quickly filled up the small surface. You brought the spoon to your lips and blew on it slowly.

"Say 'ahh'," you told him.

He did as you said, opening his mouth until you had put the spoon in. An approving hum came from behind his closed lips as he closed his eyes. You put down his spoon again. When you tried to fill up your own bowl, Jeonghan tapped your shoulder.

"What?" you asked.

He pointed at his open mouth again, and you rolled your eyes... yet still picked up his spoon for a second time. This went on for some time. You eventually got soup in your own bowl and went in between feeding him and feeding yourself.

After cleaning up, and leaving the dishes in the sink for you to take care of in the morning, the two of you went into the bathroom. In silence, you brushed your teeth. Jeonghan had gotten you another toothbrush to keep at his place. He had gotten it without you asking - surprising you with it when you used the lack of a toothbrush to end your stay. He always had something up his sleeve, which you'd usually call annoying but in truth you liked that about him. It was exciting to never know what he might pull. Seeing him like this, dull with big bags under his eyes, was heart-wrenching.

The blanket was still wrapped around him. Although, now it had fallen on his shoulder and you could see the mess of his hair. With his hair getting longer, it needed proper taking care of. Opening one of the cabinets, you quickly found his hairbrush. You beckoned him over, making him crouch down a little. Jeonghan let out a giggle as you began brushing his hair - starting at the ends and working your way up to the crown of his head. It wasn't a difficult task, seeing as Jeonghan kept still. While brushing his hair, you noticed how cold he was despite the sweat on his neck.

"You're really sick, aren't you?" you muttered. "... do you want me to draw you a bath?"

"I could really get used to your pampering..."

"Is that a yes?"

"Yes."

While Jeonghan was in his bath, you went into the bedroom to change his sheets. From time to time, Jeonghan would whine and you'd come into the bathroom to help him with something; helping him wash his back, bringing him a glass of water, and anything else that he needed. Eventually, you brought him in a change of clothes and brought him new towels to dry off with. As soon as he was out of the bathroom, you got him into the newly made bed. You pulled the covers over him and sat down next to him, putting your hand on his forehead.

"Still warm," you mumbled and tried to remove your hand, but Jeonghan started whining.

"It's nice," he murmured. "Your hand is cold."

"I could get you something to put on your forehead if-"

"No, this is good," he assured you.

"Hannie." You sighed. "I have to leave sometime."

Jeonghan looked up at you with eyes that could kill. That you would even dare suggest that you'd leave him in this condition! The gall!

"You need rest. I'm just going to sleep on your couch, I'll be with you in the morning," you explained, but he still didn't look happy.

"Sleep here." He patted on the spot next to him.

"I can't-"

"What if I need your help in the middle of the night?"

"You won't-"

"What if I have a fever-induced nightmare?"

"Jeonghan-"

"Just stay."

"... what if I get sick?" you questioned. "We can't both be sick."

"I'll be better by then. Then I can take care of you," he said matter-of-fact.

With a big sigh, you walked around the bed and got in next to him. He snuggled up against you, putting his head on your chest and wrapping his arms around your waist. The smell of his shampoo caused all of your muscles to relax.

"Thank you for coming over." Jeonghan yawned. "And for making me soup."

You hummed in response, as you began playing with his hair. The two of you stayed like that until you could hear Jeonghan's soft snores. After that, you could comfortably fall asleep.

The next morning you woke up with a sore throat and unwavering defiance towards doing the dishes. However, seeing as Jeonghan had started feeling a little better, the two of you got through it together... and then, just as you had expected, it was time for him to play nurse.

[the-kr8tor]

Hi I love your fics!!! Can you do one for the twins au where Ramona and Billie are maybe 4 or 5 and they start to notice Hobies British accent and start talking like him and saying British phrases. Like he asks them something and they just go “nah bruv” or there are just little instances throughout there day to day lives that reader and Hobie start to notice, where they use his slang at different moments at home, at the store, and it all comes to a head at school (cue parent teacher conference cause they asked a “kid are you mad bruv” and the teacher needs clarification lol). They’re able to watch a recording of their interaction during playtime with the student like you know how some schools have cameras where you can watch your kid now. Him and reader are surprised at how well they imitate his accent and try not laugh in front of the teacher but they tell them they can’t repeat everything daddy says and when readers not looking gives them a little proud wink and they giggle lol!!

Thank you for the adorable request! I changed it up a bit hope you don't mind ❤️❤️❤️

Pairing: Hobie Brown x fem! Reader/ Spider-Punk x fem! Reader

Tags: No use of Y/N, no specific physical description of the reader, Mom! Reader, Dad! Hobie, Billie and Ramona AU, Twin AU, fluff.

ʕ⁠·⁠ᴥ⁠·⁠ʔ

You feel like a kid again sitting on the tiny, clearly not for adults chair. The classroom smells of crayons and glue, the walls are painted in every color of the rainbow, posters of numbers, letters and animals are taped on the walls. Flitting your eyes behind you to check on Billie and Mona, you see them build a house using blocks, mumbling to each other. They're wearing matching sweaters today (per their request,) bees and flowers adorning the thick fabric. And ribbons in their pretty hair. Mona rambles on to her sister about lego whilst her sister listens.

Hobie sits next to you, he doesn't look any better than you. With his long legs and arms, half of his body is the only part of him sitting on the pink plastic chair. Butt half hanging on the side, legs tucked, arms around his legs, back slouched— you bite your lip at the sight, trying your best not to laugh at his state.

Hobie senses your snicker, and you feel like you're back in school again when you quickly turn your head away, pretending you weren't looking at his lanky self struggling to sit on a kindergartener's chair.

He narrows his eyes, taking the teacher's erasure off her desk, flinging it towards your direction– hitting you right on your head. It bounces off and you gasp at the audacity. Faking innocence, Hobie whistles a nonchalant tune, eyes pretending to scan the poster of the alphabet tacked on the chalkboard.

“Really?” You say, smiling through it whilst picking up the fallen eraser.

“You started it.” The father of your children teasingly says as if his girls aren't just behind him playing blocks. Way to set an example.

“Nuh-uh”

“Yu-uh”

You threaten to toss the eraser at his smug face. He shields himself with his arms, chuckling under it. The door opens and you two straighten up, putting back the stationary on the teacher's table like nothing happened.

You definitely feel like you're a kid again.

“Sorry I'm late.” She apologizes, yellow dress swinging as she speed walks towards her table. “Lots of parents, so sorry.”

“That's alright,” you smile at the preppy woman, your hands on your knees, all prim and proper in front of your girls' favourite teacher.

Billie and Ramona had a hard time adjusting to school, but once Ms. Jenkins got them out of their shell, they would always ask you and Hobie if there's school the next day, or what kind of lunch they'll have for recess because their new friends apparently don't like raisins. They love to share, just as long as they eat theirs. So you always pack extras for their friends even though either you or Hobie have to wake up earlier than usual.

You like Ms. Jenkins, she's bubbly and awfully good at her job. One time Billie got sick and couldn't go to school, she personally contacted you to ask how she's doing and even got the entire class to make ‘get well soon’ cards for her. She's a sweetheart really, and most definitely likes your kids. But what has you nervously pick at your nails is that she called you and Hobie in personally for a PTA meeting. Her little note is stapled on the school's notice about the annual meeting, indicating that she needs to talk to you and Hobie.

Said man, scooches his chair closer to yours just to hold your hand while Ms. Jenkins settles on her own chair.

“So Billie and Ramona—” she starts and you hear the girls stand up abruptly from their equally tiny chairs.

“Present!” They cheerfully exclaim at the same time.

Hobie chuckles in his seat, “you run a tight ship, miss.”

“It's alright, my loves, go play.” You say in between soft laughs as you twist in your seat to look at their smiling faces. It all makes Hobie squeeze your hand tight—love overflowing through every squeeze.

Ms. Jenkins laughs, “they love attendance time, I always see them hyping themselves up before I call them.”

“Adorable.” You coo.

“So back to business,” she clasps her hands atop the desk. “Their grades are phenomenal, I know they're still just babies and grades don't usually matter in their level, but they're crushing it.”

Hobie gives you a look, wordlessly telling you, ‘we did that’

You nod, silently replying. ‘hell yeah, we did’

“They’re friends with the whole class.” The teacher continues “Yes, it was quite a hurdle for Ramona but she conquered it with the help of Billie. And when Billie needed help with maths, she helped her there without Billie asking for it.” She smiles and you feel sunshine come out of her. “They're the perfect team.”

“That's brilliant then, why the note?” Hobie asks before you could.

“They are a delight to have in class, but—” she winces. “They have been using some…colourful slang recently.”

“Oh no,” You look at Hobie in the corner of your eyes. He shakes his head innocently at your accusation. “Was it a bad word?”

“Not particularly, uh, it's all fine and dandy, like calling their mates ‘bloke’ or ‘bruv’—”

Hobie lets out a snicker, accidentally interrupting the teacher with his laugh. You glare secretly at him.

“Right, sorry, not funny at all.” He tries to save face. “Continue, Miss.”

“It's alright that they use it but I find that they've been using it more frequently and just last week they disrupted class when they uh…” Ms. Jenkins leans closer, elbows propped on her desk, whispering her words like a secret. “Yelled during movie time to say ‘that’s the dog's bollocks’ in reference to the amazing animation.”

Hobie looks like he's dying whilst trying his hardest not to laugh. Hands clasped on his mouth, shoulders shaking, lungs wheezing and eyes tightly shut. You swear, you even see a tear clinging to his lashes.

You're not the greatest example either as you tightly press your lips together, also trying your darndest to not laugh.

You try to keep your composure even though Hobie's practically losing it next to you. Even Ms. Jenkins hides her grin.

“I'm so sorry—” you accidentally let out a giggle before inhaling deeply to tamp it down. “We'll talk to them once we get home.” Your stomach hurts from restraining yourself.

“That's great!” She clears her throat, doing better at composing herself than you and Hobie. “That's all, thank you so much for coming! There's cookies and juice in the hallway.” Standing up, she holds her hand for a handshake.

You shake her hand while Hobie's still losing it in his seat. “Thank you, Miss, have a great holiday.” You're a bit better at hiding your laughter but if Hobie let out a guffaw right now, you're for sure to follow suit.

“You too!” She smiles, “bye, Bee! Bye, Mona!” Waving her hand, the girls happily wave back.

“Okay, let's go.” You had to lift Hobie up from his seat or else he'll be glued to it while his body wracks with silent laughter.

The second you and your little family settle inside the car, Hobie lets out the loudest laugh, you follow a half second later, the sound echoing in the vehicle.

Billie and Ramona look at you two confused, hands pausing from devouring their snacks.

“I think they're proper bonkers.” Mona whispers, leaning towards her sister, and Billie nods in agreement.

[haechurch]

Its mark lees bday (ystd) and i recalled the fact that mark says hes quite obvious if he liked someone, and the fact that i see him kinda obsessed with butts and all those videos where he groped members cheeks never fails to make me drool..... ah i need him in lyfe fr. Also istj♡

So thats why i made this smut based on those^ happy mark day<3

Your roommate is a famous jock, who is currently not home for celebrating his birthday at some party that throws just for him. Honestly, you didn't know it was his birthday until one of your friends that went there told you so. You're known as someone who doesn't like parties, although surprisingly enough, your mbti says that you're an extrovert, but you always find that you're too lazy to do the stuff.

So you're wondering when this your famous roommate will come home from his party, and think of something you could do for him as it's his birthday. He's home pretty late when he finds you watching spirited away in the living room.

"Hey, i thought you were asleep," he said. You munch on your popcorn and replied as your eyes glued to the tv, "hm, how's your party, birthday boy?" He chuckled and took off his cap, throwing it softly on the couch beside you, and heavily seat across from where you're sitting. He leaned back and spread his legs while his hand brushed his messy hair. "Cool, kinda tiring. Feels like my energy's being sucked," "well, that sound sucks." Both of you chuckled, he's so introvert for that (lol).

"I understand," you hum. "You know," you shifted on your seat, and as mark was clearly aware since he saw you in the living room; dressed so loosely only in your camisole (braless) and short pants, showing him a pose that makes you utterly look fuckable, you blurted out, "...do you have any idea what else that can be sucked at this moment?"

"What?" His tone was confused and he's kinda taken aback by your words.

You swear to god that teasing him is the most fun thing to do in this world. You laugh your ass off and brush him away, saying that you need to take a shower since you haven't done that today. I mean, why take a shower when you're literally at home all day?

"Since it's your birthday, why don't you tell me your wish? Or something that you wanted? Think about it while i'm in the shower." You wink at him playfully as you hopped into your room.

Mark's head is full of thoughts right now. He didn't know he would ask someone for giving him a birthday present, but he knows that he really needs that. He's thinking about it so hard as he cooling his head down in the shower too, until he decided on what he wanted for his birthday, especially from you.

Fyi, you can always hear when mark lee is jerking off in his room (or bathroom) when you're home. Of course, the wall is pretty thin and he's just too loud. So when you finished your quick shower and heard him in the bathroom, you knew exactly what he need the most for his birthday.

Later, you knock on mark's door, asking for permission to barge in. "Can i come in?"

"Uh-uh, yeah, sure," when you entered his room, you saw his hair is already half dry, and he is wearing a tight black t-shirt with shorts.

Holy moly.

Honestly, no one in the world would disagree that mark lee is hot.

You're making a bee line to where he stand beside his desk, and started talking next to him. "Sooo have you decided?" He chuckled nervously and started to act like an idiot. "Decided what?"

You frown an eyebrow, "your wish? You can tell me what you want for your birthday?" You reminded him. "Oh that, yeah, um-"

He placed his hand on his nape and be looking so awkward right now, but that's why you like him.

You bit your lips in amusement. Now it's getting harder to hold back.

You can't take it anymore and lean closer to him. He didn't even budge. "Mark.." you place your hands on his torso, and he slightly flinched at your action. "Tell me.." your hands caressing him down his abs, and stop at his groin. "Your wish." You whispered in his ear, and he swear he was getting goosebumps, his breath hitched when you place your hand on his center and gently cupped his bulge.

"Wait, wait, wait, hold up hold up," he's panicking as he points a pointless finger in the air, and you went crazy because of it. You're definitely a simp for mark lee.

"I-uh, hold up a sec, are you for real?" He's questioning instead.

"What do you mean?" You smiled at him. He's so adorable.

"I mean, why are you... i feel like.. this isn't it-"

"Mark."

"Yeah?"

"Just tell me, please? What do you want right now?"

You glanced at his boner and it's so fucking obvious. God it must be hurt. He has to quit playing dumb and ask for it when he knows he needs it more than anything.

"Fuck, help me with these," he gestured upturned hands right above his legs.

"How, mark? Tell me how do you like it, hm?" He has no idea how you had so much fun teasing him.

He got short-circuited again when you press your body against him and crane your head up, about to kiss him, "wai wh-" he backed off a little and placed his hands on your waist, both eyes finding each other as you hum before slowly close the gap between your lips and kissed him.

A short one. And then your eyes meet again, and he give you another kiss, this time out of his control. He basically pressed his face against yours, hands on your jaw before he put it all over your body and proceed to push you against the wall. You hang on him by grabbing at his nape and head, ruffling his hair into a mess. The kiss never breaks, he kiss you like he mean it, now he pressed his body on yours, and you can feel his big cock, hard as a rock. He's not that silent when kissing too, you can hear his breathy grunts and the fact that he's also a moaner. He tilted his head back and forth to kiss you at different angles, his tongue all over your mouth.

Both of you squirmed uncontrollably against each other when you make out against his bedroom wall, he squeezed your ass before he tapped your thighs for you to jump on him and bring you onto his bed.

He didn't waste his time pulling down his shorts and breathily plea, "suck me off."

You delighted hearing his request, overjoyed to finally have him asking for you to please him, "as you wish, sir."

You immediately take him into your hand, eyes locked with him as he winced, groaning when you suck his tip and swallow him into your mouth. When you started to bob your head, he throw his head back with a sigh, his neckline is prominent and his adam's apple bob deliciously.

You can feel your lips torn up because of how big he is, and you can feel the veins as you drag your tongue along his shaft. "Oh, fuck, that's it baby, you're doing so good," he hissed sexily and it almost made you cum. Embarrassing.

Considering how much you are already wet for him from just sucking his cock is insane. He face fucked you as he let out his honey moans and groans, every time you find his tip meeting the back of your throat and you felt like swallowing it, you try your best not to choke miserably on his cock.

"Where do you want me to cum?" He asked. "Of course, you can't talk." He chuckled as he mocked you. "You have to swallow it like a good girl, you think you can do that?" You nod your head eagerly. "Alright."

"Good girl." Every time he spits those words from his mouth, you felt your pussy clenching and it hurts.

His thrusts are getting faster and faster when warm loads run down your throat as he grunts loudly while throwing his head back again, then when he look down, you already gaze into his eyes and barely lick your lips, mouth full and smudged with his cum and your saliva.

"Shit.." he's savoring the sight before him for a while, and then he asked.

"Can i fuck you?"

You cracking up in front of him, it's not funny at all but-

"I told you, your wish is my command, baby." You started to strip and show him your naked body, prettily exposed on his bed, ready to be used.

"Fuck, isn't this my best birthday ever?" You laugh at him again.

"I know. Happy birthday, now eat your cake." You said jokingly.

He sneered and take his remaining clothes off, then crawl into the bed, and started kissing you from head to toe. He played with your tits, fumbled them here and there, pinching your nipples, nipping and licking. He sucked on the flesh just right above your chest, your throat, your shoulder, marking his mark.

"This tells that you're mine."

"Yours."

Your voice hitched and your neck arched when he lick your pussy, eating you out. You squirm under his touch and pull on his hair, only making him more passionate to giving you pleasure. He abused your clit and folds in the most delicious way that made you a moaning mess, the sound of him slurping your juices and his moan was making you beyond aroused. His tongue and lips find their way to clean up and suck every fold, fucking your hole. You whine when you feel like you're about to burst.

"Wait, mark, i wanna come around your cock," you asked him with a pout, and he can't really resist that.

"On your knees, pretty girl." You do as he says, eagerly arching your back and showing him your ass. He slapped it. Twice.

Mark rubs his tip sensually up and down your entrance before lining his cock to your pussy, he's doing that for a while, making more juices leaking from your core. But suddenly he put his cock between your ass cheeks then poked on the entrance, but never really thrust them. He's such a tease.

"H-hurry, please.."

"Hm? It's kinda nice to hear you begging like this, you know? What is it, pretty?"

"Please, mark, just fuck me," he never felt this victorious before.

He smirked and wet his lips, "gladly."

You moan as he rams into you, he picked up a steady pace as he fuck you from behind. He got your eyes rolled to the back of your head, drools are already all over your mouth and chin.

"Fuck, mark," "it's so good. So good, so good, so good," you cry over his cock, you heard him grunt heavily and he felt you tighten when he land another slap on your ass.

"Yeah? You like that, huh? Tell me you like it."

"I like it, i love it, ah-"

He's fucking you so good you felt like you're gonna cum soon. Your pussy keeps getting tighter as it swallows him, wrapping his cock like a gift.

"Are you gonna cum? Come on, cum around me, pretty girl," he squeezed and slap your ass, his thrust never faltered, bringing you into your climax. "Ahh- i think- i'm gonna cum, mark-"

The moment he played with your nipples, you lost it, you came so hard your vision got white as he keep thrusting into you, chasing his high.

"M-mark!"

"I know baby, i know, just, try to take this one okay, please,"

He pleaded. And you moan even harder. He piston in and out until you heard his deep groans as he cum inside you. Both of you were too immersed in the sex that you didn't realize what was just happened. He quickly pulled out though.

"Shit, i'm sorry,"

"It's okay. I'm on the pill anyways,"

When you glanced at him, he was breathing heavily, sweat covering his body, making him glow under the dim light. Mouth agape, hair's disheveled. Perfect.

"So.."

"So?"

"Uh, thank you, for the present. This is what i wanted from you. I guess.."

You smiled fondly at him. He has always been just a hot roommate to you although he's actually attractive in many ways, but you might really, really like him more than you thought.

"You know what?" You get up on your elbow, "you were always loud when you jerked off."

Oh.

Oh, he's freaking out.

"And that's.. with you almost every time calling my name.."

He's swearing in his head.

Mark lee, aren't you just too obvious?

[lemondemonpickuplines]

Hey girl are you Hyakugojyuuichi 2003? 'Cause Hey you, sit down and listen

Don't be flippant and don't be dismissin'

Think you're a Flash encyclopedia?

Eating, breathing Macromedia?

Think you're cool sayin' "All Your Base"?

Get that Xiao Xiao outta my face

You gotta be kidding me with that crap

Animutation's where it's at

Nine outta ten sociopaths agree

You gotta see Hyakugojyuuichi

From the Moch to the Rie to the Pee to the Wee

Just take it from me, MC NC

You won't believe your eyes, you'll go insane

I mean, what's up with that plastic plane?

You're an idiot if you disagree

You gotta see Hyakugojyuuichi

If you got the time, go grab a pen

And watch that thing again and again

Try to figure it out, what does it mean?

What's the significance of Mr. Bean?

Does anybody know? Are there any takers?

What's up with all the broken pacemakers?

The world is full of speculation

But nobody cracks this Animutation

Nine outta ten sociopaths agree

You gotta see Hyakugojyuuichi

You're an idiot if you disagree

Just take it from MC (Ah!) NC

You won't believe your eyes, you'll go insane (Aaah!)

I mean, what's up with that plastic plane? (Aaah!)

From the Moch to the Rie to the Pee to the Wee (Aaah!)

You gotta see Hyakugojyuuichi (Aaah!)

(1... 2... 3... Hit it!)

Wakeman is biased, like a household appliance

Hello Kitty and McGruff have an unholy alliance

Science is brutal and it cuts like a knife

Not even Obi-Wan can save the yodel of life

Your name is Bob, you're my heart-throb

I lost my job when I got fired

By a guy named Farchie, he was full of starch

He smelled like an orangutan's old apartment

Found a hobo in my room, what do I do?

He looks dead, he's full of lead

Bleeding red onto my bedspread

And he also seems to be missing his head

Why am I holding this gun and axe?

Do exploding pacemakers cause heart attacks?

Will Mr. Bean ever get his fill

Or will he just keep on telling me to kill?

Hey, don't you gimme that look!

You never had what it took

I took the beef and I beefed it up

You sat and whined while I took the cup

Of gold. You are getting old

When you see my face you better fold

Take this mop and shove it, boy

'Cause it's the only way you'll be employed

I am known as the Beef Bastard

(Everyone knows I'm the ultimate master)

I am known as the Beef Bastard

(Everyone else is a walking disaster)

I am known as the Beef Bastard

(Think you're fast? Well I know I'm faster!) (Ye-ye-ye-ye)

I am known as the Beef Bastard

(Everyone knows I'm the ultimate master) (Ye-ye-ye-ye)

Ma-ma-ma [*laughing*]

Ma-ma

Beef Bastard!

Weeeell I'm Shmorky! Eatin' PORKY!

Whitey rap sure sounds dorky!

Got a girl... she's a DOUBLE D!

I slap her on the butt dressed as a bumble bee!

I eat paste all damn day

I was in a Shakespeare play

I sit down on a Lazy Susan

Spin around like TOMMY CRUISIN!

Bong bong bing bing

I get payed to play with my thing!

I zip out zip in zip up BEGIN!

ROOM WITH A MOOSE! Jay Leno's CHIN!

Ambulance, Enron, Pee Wee, Pokémon

Bulbasaur, Pikachu, Jigglypuff, THEY CHOOSE YOU!

And I can't think of anymore to say

TV says doughnuts are high in fat, kazoo (キミたちとの　であいはぜんぶ)

Found a hobo in my room (ちゃんと　おぼえてる)

It's Princess Leia, the yodel of life (きずつけあった　こともあったけど)

Give me my sweater back or I'll play the guitar! (それは（え～と）わすれた)

It's Steve's Adventure!

(Go, go, go, go)

(Go, go, go, go)

(Go, go, go, go)

(Go, go, go, go)

One-fifty-one Pokémon on the run

Suzuki-san is a formation of a bun

And a veggie burger with tsukemono

Jay-Jay has flown away with Sonny Bono

To the afterlife to visit Barney Fife

And to see Pero's screenshots of his wife

Named Chris Benoit, wearing a pretty dress

Saying "Watashi wa animutation ga suki desu."

Do the Mario! Isty-bitsy hockey

Lipsnot is not magic like a monkey

Captain Lou body-slams a rubber duckie

Just like in the match of Earth vs. Funky

Lucky Lucky nice to Mew-two

I need tea for two, how about you

Mr. Coldheart, or should I say Professor?

It looks like Lesko got revenge on my dresser

Props to Neil, he's the real deal

His friends all call him Mr. Popiel

He's the computer geek who doesn't shower for a week

His looks are hot, his clothes are CHIC!

He singlehandedly changed the face of the net

He's an online semi-celebrity you won't forget

He stormed onto the scene like a raging thunder

His seizure inducing flag says "Mr. Gahbunga."

Hey kids! Komiyona?

Omiyo mokemon halibudo

Halimatashinta, Pokinumushimi da

Watago get ready to rumble! (1... 2... 3... Hit it!)

Bamba-jidda-babla-biga

Hedimana-gina-hamana-gita

Hana-buto-halo-gini (Ye-ye-ye-ye-ma-ma)

Ala-pone-koala-bedi (Ye-ye-ye-ye-ma-ma)

Anamu-dada, ona-dote

Omanama-zenba-bolo-ho

Puyawa-dirbu-kowa-fuji (Ye-ye-ye-ye-ma-ma)

Waruma-ina-hada-bidi! (Ye-ye-ye-ye-ma-ma)

Teyo-mata, elino-wen

Hadawata-buto-bito-bed

Amatawa-jupto-hubba-pati

Fola-coola Colin Mochrie!

TV says doughnuts are high in fat, kazoo (キミたちとの　であいはぜんぶ)

Found a hobo in my room (ちゃんと　おぼえてる)

It's Princess Leia, the yodel of life (きずつけあった　こともあったけど)

Give me my sweater back or I'll play the guitar! (それは（え～と）わすれた)

There you have it, that's the game

One-fifty-one, we can all be the same

I'm sure that it's been appetizing

With all the subliminal advertising

This has been a celebration, Animutation fans across the nation

In formation raise their hands in dedication

To the crazy-flashing-psychopathic-happy-dancing-super-magic-

Power-mega-ultra-kitschy (Hyakugojyuuichi)

Nine outta ten sociopaths agree

You gotta see Hyakugojyuuichi

From the Moch to the Rie to the Pee to the Wee

Just take it from me, MC NC

You won't believe your eyes, you'll go insane

I mean, what's up with that plastic plane?

You're an idiot if you disagree

You gotta see Hyakugojyuuichi

.

[ugh-yoongi]

fic where yoongi says exactly what he means all the time (ie - i have a massive crush on you) and reader thinks “no one is that direct” and doesn’t believe anything he says because i love miscommunication in fics but YOONGI SURE AS SHIT DOESNT

you know why

hello my beloved birthday-having friend <3 hope you enjoy.

fun fact: this is the yoongi bee dressed up as the night she got drunk as fuck and spent an hour doing a powerpoint presentation on bts kinks. don't we love that for her :)

direct

pairing: yoongi x gn!reader genre: college au, strangers to friends to lovers; fluff warnings: yoongi is an implied fuckboy, brief mention of blood, very direct communication, cigarettes, swearing, a kiss. rating: e for everyone wordcount: 700

You meet Min Yoongi in your chemistry lab.

You meet Min Yoongi when he’s half asleep and wearing a permanent scowl. Looks like he’s just rolled out of bed, and you sneak a glance at his shoes to confirm. Yeah, two different ones, just as you’d suspected. You’ve met this brand of academically-declined fuckboy before and it’s never ended well for you, so you breathe out a sigh of relief when he ducks into a row towards the back.

Then your instructor tells you to pair off, that whoever you choose is who you’ll be stuck with for the rest of the semester, and no one else must want to work with Min Yoongi, either, because he’s the only person left. He blinks half-lidded eyes at you—slowly, like a cat—and says, “Fine by me. You’re who I wanted to partner with, anyway.”

And you scoff. Min Yoongi didn’t even bother to buy the textbook, and you’re at your seat with an arrangement of notecards and highlighters and a stack of notes you’d taken over the weekend just because you were bored and wanted to get a head start. “Yeah, I’m sure I was.”

You’re dumb enough to refer to Min Yoongi as a friend five months later.

It’s a Friday night. Your roommate is god-knows-where, probably getting railed within an inch of their life at some party. Good for them. At least someone around here is taking advantage of their college years instead of wasting away on a threadbare thrift shop couch, a magical girl anime playing on your laptop; the one you watch only when you’re alone, because it’s too embarrassing otherwise.

Then there’s a knock at the door.

Min Yoongi is on the other side with a black eye and a busted lip. Refuses to meet your eye. Says, “I didn’t know where else to go,” even though he’s got a posse that’d put small armies to shame.

You roll your eyes. “You don’t need to bullshit me to get my attention.”

He smiles at that. “Why do you always think I’m bullshitting you?”

“Because you’re a sewer king, Min Yoongi.” Then you sigh, because couldn’t Yoongi have pulled this stunt when you were showered and wearing clean clothes? “Fine, get in here. But I’m not doing this shit again.”

Yoongi always smells like smoke and petrichor and trouble, and it’s the same when he breezes past you this time, too. “Thanks, doll. I don’t know what I’d do without you.”

This fucking guy, you think. “Yeah,” you intone, “what are friends for, huh?”

You become absolutely certain that Min Yoongi is full of shit two years later.

“You’re full of shit,” you tell him, watching as he flicks the ashes of his cigarette onto the hood of his beat-to-hell car.

“Don’t you think this is getting a little old?”

“Don’t you think you’re too old to act like this?”

“Who’s acting?” Sticks the cigarette between his lips and takes a drag. Blows the smoke out, waves it away from you.

“You are,” you insist. “No one on earth is this honest. Especially not you. Especially not about something like this.”

Yoongi groans. Tosses the butt onto the pavement and stomps on it. “You want me to prove it?”

You curse the way your heartbeat hastens. How embarrassing that you’re falling for this. That all Yoongi has to do is sell you some kinda line about being in love with you for all your good sense to crumble at your feet. “You’re not in love with me,” you argue. More like you insist.

“Says who?” he fires back, inching closer. Smells like smoke again—nicotine and a desperate kind of hope and bad ideas that might not be all that bad. “Says you, who doesn’t believe a fucking thing I say?”

“That’s not—”

He stands between your spread things. Places two fingers beneath your chin and forces you to look at him. “I’ve never lied to you, doll. Not once.”

“Bullshit,” you answer, your voice diminished to a pathetic hush, but there’s no heat in it. “Fine. Prove it, then.”

You become absolutely certain that you don’t know a goddamn thing when Min Yoongi presses his lips to yours.

[sirfrogsworth]

The Babylon Bee School of Comedy

Have you ever wanted to make Elon Musk reply to you with a double cry laughing emoji?

If you crave that sweet billionaire validation you need only follow this carefully crafted conservative comedy content creation course for that powerhouse of online satire... The Babylon Bee.

Soon you too could be bootlicking billionaire balls with the rest of The BBee writers.

Are you ready to get your learn on?

Let us Bee-gin.

The number one most important rule that all The BBee writers must internalize to their core...

Conservative comedy abhors effort.

Brainstorming for hours on end to craft the perfect premise and punchline... is for the Libs. Check out this Facebook meme that got 10,000 likes.

Can you order Starbucks from a bar? Doesn't matter, it's a snowflake drink for a snowflake Lib.

Does this joke not have an actual punchline? Doesn't matter, get lost you stupid Lib!

Is this technically a joke by definition? Doesn't matter, if you believe it is a joke, then it's a joke! Just like modern currency.

If you put too much thought into a joke, it might grow in complexity. That could be confusing! The death knell of any conservative joke are the words, "Hmm, that's a thinker."

This brings us to rule number two...

NO THINKERS!

Let's take this Ben Garrison comic as an example.

Spell everything out! Label everything! Don't leave anything to the imagination! If your audience has to figure something out or draw their own conclusions, what fun is that?

Conservatives want to hear things that are familiar. They want their beliefs parroted back at them. You must regurgitate those beliefs and then just make it *sound* like a joke. Don't break new ground or introduce new ideas. Don't get all caught up in interesting wordplay or clever puns or subverting expectations.

All expectations should be fully verted.

That is definitely a word because I saw someone use it on Facebook. End of research.

Here is a helpful tip. If you can't imagine the joke coming out of the mouth of late night comedy genius GUTFELD!, then you need to dial it back a bit. Do not surpass GUTFELD! levels of humor. GUTFELD! is your touchstone.

Oh, GUTFELD! I laughed so hard I FELD it in my GUT.

See, I went too far with my fancy pun. That is not the GUTFELD! way.

But what happens if inspiration is fleeting and you can't pay attention to your comedy writing task because you don't believe ADHD is real and thus you are unmedicated?

Don't you worry. If you do happen to get writer's block or are distracted by a funny Pepe meme or a shiny object, just call your racist uncle and say the magic word... "Bidenflation."

As the ensuing unhinged rant darts from subject to subject without any kind of connecting theme, just start writing down every right wing buzzword you hear. Then just insert those buzzwords Mad Libs-style into a derivative joke format.

Let's practice!

Ex. 1: Why did the PRONOUNS cross the BORDER? To get to the DRAG QUEEN STORY HOUR!

Ex. 2: How many GENDERS does it take to GROOM a lightbulb? Two! One to hold the BUTT PLUG and one to GO WOKE, GO BROKE.

Great start! I'm sure with a polishing pass those will make more sense. Or not. The bar is pretty much "will it get clicks?" so we're not too worried about coherence.

Heh... Mad Libs.

U MAD, LIBS?

Get it? Cuz Libs are always mad? About the normalized bigotry and whatnot.

Jokes are always better when you need to explain them.

Oh! That's another rule. Write that down. Wisdom like this is why I am teaching this course, of course. Hah, that's like that horse show song. I got jokes coming out the wazoo. Wazoo is my butt, right? Siri, is wazoo a butt? Oof, I'm kinda spacing on what the next lesson is.

I really wish Matt Walsh hadn't flushed my Adderall down the crapper.

Can I get a second opinion? Top Gun was so good. What does Tom Cruise think about ADHD? He always has good takes on stuff like this. Did I leave my oven on? Shazam, what song goes doodoo doo doo doooooo? Can you vacuum a yard? Has anyone tried that? That sounds more like a marijuana thought than an ADHD tangent. I should double check the THC content of that cotton candy vape juice.

I'm flyin' off the rails over here.

Matt, are you super duper sure it's not real?

Okay, fine. I'm an "energetic boy."

I hope whichever fish absorbs my meds is extra focused on whatever fish shit he needs to get done.

COMEDY WRITING!

Sometimes it is best to learn through observation. Let's eavesdrop on an actual The BBee writer's room to see how the sausage is made...

"So what did your racist uncle have to say?"

"Well, first he texted me a cameraphone picture of Trump as an astronaut that he wants me to print out cuz he doesn't know what a crypto wallet is... but then he said all the woke schools are turning kids into a bunch of gay commies."

"EUREKA!"

Classic! The BBee writers strike again. I mean, they aren't striking. There is no commie clamoring for a union at The Babylon Bee. That's for damn sure. FOCUS!

Do you get the joke though? With the kids and the gay and the communism?

Because all of those woke schools totally cover complex economic theories in 4th grade and all it takes to turn gay is a little persuasion from a teacher with green hair. Libs of TikTok wouldn't lie about that. End of research.

Look at this public school teacher!

I mean, you knooow she has a litter box in her classroom. I can just sense it. End of research.

Sure... it is just a context-free picture of a person with green hair in front of a flag and you cannot actually judge the quality of their teaching ability from this. But yoouuu knoooooow she is skipping right over grammar lessons and giving detailed instructions on how to turn gay.

Step 1: Look at a bunch of butts. Step 2: Touch a bunch of butts. Step 3: Gay sex a bunch of butts.

(Replace butts with cooches for lesbians.)

Grooming accomplished.

And you definitely shouldn't look up that green-hair'd, nose ring'd educator and research her any further. Extensive research is for the Libs, bro. Because you definitely don't want to discover she is a passionate high school English teacher who makes fun content on TikTok in the hopes that people will buy things off her wishlist so her students will have a better learning experience. I mean, caring about her students? That's so gay.

YoooOOOuuuUUU knnnooooooOOOw she is a bad teacher because she has green hair and a flag. End. Of. Research.

So... you have your gay communist headline that is perfect to get all of those sweet conservative clicks. But you still have a full webpage to fill out with more words and stuff.

Now I want to see if you learned anything from my perfectly focused and informative teachings. I want you to write some jokes about kids becoming gay communists.

Ready? GO!

Joke #1 Little Billy has wealthy parents so all the students will share his cookie at snack time.

Joke #2 At the beginning of the day, students pick a new gender out of a hat but all the kids fight over Attack Helicopter.

Joke #3 At lunch, the students have to stand in a peanut butter and jelly bread line.

Joke #4 The teacher makes the kids take turns combing each others' hair for a grooming session.

Wait a sec... are those... THINKERS?

No no no no no! You made my brain all confused and thinky!

You need to calm down, you overachieving silly billy. You forgot the first rule... NO EFFORT.

Just make the same joke over and over again with slightly different wording. EASY!

Remember the classic final rule of comedy...

Jokes always get funnier the more you repeat them.

Anyway, that's probably enough... joke.

Now let's close this article out!

Maybe we can drop the pretense this is comedic satire and just do some hardcore pandering. Gotta own the Libs, amirite?

Gender theory and drag queens and guns, oh my! That is pure pander-monium.

Just shove those factless tactless Tucker talking points straight down their gullet. They'll forget this was supposed to be funny and shake their fist in the air with exaltation. And it's definitely a great idea to put the thought of gunning down drag queens in their heads. That won't backfire in any way!

Congratulations! You are now ready to "write" for The Babylon Bee.

Please purchase this official Trump NFT certificate for $99 that acknowledges that you have completed this course and have a very poor understanding of what satire actually is.

End of research.

[wontheworld]

can we talk? | 31

"Hey, Sunghoon," Yn whispered as the camera turned off.

He turned around quickly. "Yes?" he answered.

"I want to talk to you," she spoke. "Can you meet me at that park around 10?" she questioned, looking away as she spoke to him.

He smiled before nodding. "Yeah, sure, I'm down," he said. She nodded before going to her room, but he stopped her with his words. "I'm sorry, Yn," he spoke.

She turned around and furrowed her eyebrows. "What's there to be sorry about?" she questioned.

He shrugged. "I... We... Just ignore me. I'll see you at ten," he spoke, going to his room, leaving her confused before going into hers.

🧸.

"Someone looks excited!" Yuri spoke, coming into the bathroom behind the girl.

Yn nodded, fixing her eyeliner. "Finally speaking to him. It's been like a couple of weeks, and then I was gone for those five days. Feels nice to know I'm going to speak to him again," she replied to Yuri.

Yuri hummed. "I'm proud of you, Yn. Please, please, please don't get caught! I'll be damned if you do. All of this could be put down the drain," Yuri said as Yn nodded.

"I promise not to get caught. I have this mask," she spoke, pulling out a black mask from her back pocket. "And this puffer jacket will eat up, don't play," she giggled.

Yuri smiled, about to say something before Yunjin walked in. "Yn babe, your Uber is outside! Go quick before Manager Kim comes back!" She smacked Yn's butt.

Yn laughed. "I'll see you guys later!" she smiled, leaving the bathroom and going to put her shoes on before heading out the door.

🧸.

She sat on the bench, listening to music and waiting for him to come.

"Sorry, I'm a little late. I helped Jay clean up. That's besides the point. What did you want to talk about?" he suddenly spoke, scaring her a bit.

She grinned. "It's alright. I, uh, I need to say a few things," she said.

He nodded slowly. "Okayyyyyy," he dragged out.

She sighed heavily. "I apologize for those weeks I ignored you and shit. I didn't even want to do it, but my manager told me to do it, and I listened to her for some reason, even though it was hurting myself. I was being selfish, talking about saving my career, but that was just bullshit. And when you confessed to me that one day, I felt terrible for not answering you because I like you too. I like you a lot more than you could imagine and--"

She was cut off by a pair of lips connecting to hers. She was surprised but still kissed him back anyway.

He pulled away, grinning. "All those words you're wasting time. We could've been making out by now," he joked.

Even though it was dark outside, he could still see her face turn really red.

"You're getting red. I'm sorry I disturbed your yapping. You can continue," Sunghoon grinned.

She looked at him before leaning in for another kiss, which he gladly accepted, making her smile into the kiss before pulling away.

"I was expecting to apologize, not to kiss," she laughed. He laughed too.

"Well, basically, you got both! And you can finally unblock me, please!" he said, making her laugh even more.

She hummed. "I will, I will," she cheesed.

"What does this make us?" he questioned.

"Let's take it slow. We don't need girlfriend and boyfriend titles that fast, Romeo," she spoke.

He nodded. "I like it. Looks like I'll annoy you 10 times more!" he exclaimed as she rolled her eyes at him playfully.

prev behind the scenes next

Taglist: @deobitifull @hoonstxr @seulgipage @purennn @haechansbbg @minetaphobe @badasgirlfriend @seunnimg @hyuzaa @ttylxox2 @ariadores @nyfwyeonjun @who-tf-soddhi @nqvgue @mikus-bakery @luvlyniya @akuspic @nxzz-skz @minhosprettywife @chillychuu @bee-the-loser @baevsxii

[watsittoyah]

Before The Snow, Came The Flame…

Young!Coriolanus snow x blk fem!reader

Theme: Morally gray themes, talks of suicide, heavy sexual content. Possessive/Obsessive behavior. This is pure fiction and should only be consumed as such…

Chapter 00 Just Say Yes…

(Sexual Act 1- Oral sex, and breathe play )

Evangeline-

I’ve always hated the snow, because when snow comes, that means death to nature. The pretty flowers wither away, the warm air turns cold and crisp, and the animals become scarce. But the one thing I hate the most about snow is when it falls it brings death to the living.

“Do you think they’ll find out about us still existing? The Capital, I mean.” Johnathan my half-brother asks me as we trek across the frosted ground. “It’s been what ten years? I highly doubt anyone other than Nana-Bee remembers. Besides don’t you think they would’ve came for us by now?” I tell him as I lift a thick branch, letting him pass. I soon after follow and I see some pine cones. I gather them and hear Johnathan give a sigh.

“I guess you’re right. And it is for the best that no one knows. It’s already sad that we can’t walk around without people staring. But you’re lucky Evangeline. Your eyes are only yellow sometimes. I wish I could do that.” I ruffle his curly hair and give a laugh. “Nana-Bee taught me. I’m sure she’ll teach you when you’re older.” He rolls his golden eyes at me and as I’m sure he’s about to give me some snarky remark on why our great-great grandmama won’t be teaching him color changing, we hear a loud-

Snap!

We immediately freeze in place. I sign to him to hide but he shakes his head and signs back that he’s not leaving me.

As much as I love this kid, I’m sure he’s going to get me killed one day. I go to sign something else but I see something in the distance and I yank Jonathan down just in time to feel something whiz past my ear. The tree explodes into small splinters.

“Suis-moi.” I order him. He follows me without hesitation as we stay low.

I feel my heart pounding in my throat all because our father had warned us to keep watch for outsiders. Whether they were Peace Keepers or just people from surround districts. If they see us, they will take us and sell us to the capital.

Even though our existence is close to a secret now, there are still older people who remember us. Children of fire, is what they’d call us now, which is a better name than being called Morningstar children.

Another bullet whizzes past my head but unluckily for Johnathan it hits him in the shoulder.

I go to help him but he pushes me back and hisses for me to hide. “N-“ A gun sounds off and I just throw myself up into a near by tree. I use the leaves to keep me hidden and watch over Jonathan as he writhes in pain.

“It’s not a deer! It’s a…kid?” A large lunk of a man looks at my brother and he knees down. “Geez sorry kid, but wait wasn’t there two of you?” The man looks up into the trees and Johnathan bites the man on the ankle.

He lets out a yelp and he takes the butt of his gun and hits my brother in his face which makes the flames in my fingertips ignite.

I leap out of the tree and when I land, I push him hard into the ground and I grab at his face. He yells as I start to dig my nails into his eyes. “Evangeline, let him go.” I hear Jonathan hiss as he yanks at my blouse. “I’ll go when he’s dead!” I snap at him.

“You crazy bitch!” The man yells and with a swift punch I hit in his nose. He goes limp for a second and I get up feeling my hands getting hot.

“Evangeline calm down, please. We need to go.” He yanks at me again and as we start to run, a strong grip yanks me down. “Eva-” I push Jonathan forward and yell for him to run. I see the hesitation for a split second but he doesn’t what he’s told. He has an injury he needs to take care of.

The man yanks me down and I hit the ground hard. He looks down at me with such hate in his eyes and I smirk at him. “Fuck y-” I feel his boot hit the side of my head hard and I soon feel the darkness take over.

Coriolanus-

“Hey! I got something!” Bugs and I turn back around and head towards Duke, who had a body slung over his shoulder. Which was odd because he said that he was chasing after a deer.

He has turned and we saw that it was a woman. Her black locs were long and covering her face. However there was a long white stripe in the tangled mass of black.

“Why do you have an unconscious girl with you?” Bugs asks as Duke puts the passed out girl down and cuffs her wrists as well as put a blind fold over her eyes.

“At first I thought her and that fucking kid she was with were animals just by how they were moving. But that’s my fault from the stories my great grandparents told me, I should have known they were Morningstar children.” I give Bugs a look and he shrugs. “I don’t know Coryo.”

Duke throws his hands in the air in frustration. “Don’t tell me you never heard of Morningstar children.”

“No, what the hell are you talking about?” I ask feeling annoyed as I eyed the unconscious girl. “My great grandparents told me about these people. They’re demons in human form. They can set a flame to anything even ash. However if you were to capture one them, they can grant you the key to heaven. So that even if you were the greatest sinner, when you die you will still make it to the pearly gates. But you have to make them give their loyalty to you or else they will turn on you like a rabid dog.”

“Wait, how is she…a demon in human form she looks like a regular girl to me.” Bugs asks as he kneels close to her. Duke yanks him away from her.

“There are a few signs, if it’s a woman, they have a bewitching scent that makes men turn lustful.”

“That sounds like shit.” I interrupt. Duke just waves me off. “But all of them, they have this hair as black as night and a singular while strand of hair. It’s like their birthmark. But the number one thing that gives them away are the various color of yellow in their eyes. They say when you look at them you can see the pits of hell in them.” I look over at the girl and notice her breathing is steady.

To the untrained you’d think she was sleeping but I know better. She’s pretending. I use to do that as a child when I didn’t want to go to bed but my parents had checked to make sure I was asleep. I keep my eyes trained on her as I hear Duke and Bugs bickering.

“It all sounds like a bunch of bullshit. Besides this girl has a family that’s going to come looking for her. Just let her go and we can pretend that we never seen her.” Bugs says as he walks over towards the girl.

Duke side steps him, blocking his path. “Do you not understand what we have here? We have the key to damnation. I know someone in the capital would pay big bucks for her. I’m not giving her back.”

“Duke you sound so idiotic. Coryo, please talk some sense into him. This girl needs to go hom-” I raise a hand and see the girl stir.

“What’s wrong?” Bugs asks as he walks over. Instead of answering I reach over her but Duke yanks my arm back. I send a glare his way and his grip loosens on my arm. I then remove the blindfold from her face and I lock onto a pair a dark brown eyes. They looked wild, angry and beautiful all at the same time.

When she locked her eyes onto me I kneeled there in front of her frozen. Because I was captivated by her. If she had a proper bath and clothes, she’d be more beautiful than any rose I’ve ever laid my eyes on.

When she speaks, I can hear an accent that I can’t quite place. “Please let me go, I didn’t do anything.” The girl pleads to us.

“I’m letting her go, her eyes aren’t yellow, she’s just scared.” Bugs went to take the cuff off of her but Duke moved in and grabbed the girl by her face and pinned her to the tree behind her.

“Hey!” Bugs and I both yell in unison. “I know what I saw, and I know what you did. Stop lying! And how did you change the color of your eyes? I saw hell in them! Tell me how, before I snap your neck! Don’t make me look like a liar!” He yelled as his hand squeezes around her throat.

I quickly pick up my gun and I aim it at Duke. Feeling that if I don’t threaten him he might just break her. “Let the girl go or I will make a mess out of you.” I say calmly as I cock the gun. He gives me a glance and smirks.

“I don’t know what witch craft she’s pulling but I’m not letting this golden goose out of my sight. I’ll let her go but she comes with us.”

“Hey if you can prove she’s a Morningstar child or whatever then we will figure something out later but if she’s not one then we need to find her people and give her back. Deal?” Bugs comments trying to de-escalate the whole situation.

Duke lets her throat go and she sucks in a mouth full of air as she collapses onto the ground. “Fine, but I know what I saw.” Duke snaps as he moves back.

I don’t lower the gun until he’s several feet from her. When I see it’s somewhat safe for her, I kneel down in front of her and she jerks back from me. I move the gun and raise my hands to let her know I’m not going to hurt her. “You’re safe, I promise.” She glares past me and I know she’s glaring at Duke.

“What’s your name?” I ask her so she can focus on me. “Evangeline.” She answers as she keeps her eyes on Duke. “Evangeline, hey I will do my best to take care of you while you’re in my care. Duke won’t touch you again. You have my word.” She slowly puts her brown eyes on me and I see a flicker of something.

Gold? Maybe an amber color? The flicker leaves her eyes and all I see is brown.

“I want to go home.” She tells me as her brown eyes stare deep into mine. “You’ll go home soon.” I tell her as I find my hand moving closer to her small brown face.

I move the long white loc out of her eyes and right there in that moment, I knew she was going to be my little rose. She had thorns, that was clear to see but past the danger, there was something more. Something I wanted to…possess.

Evangeline-

Several days later…

The smell of snow was in the air and it was foul. People will tell you it doesn’t have a smell, but they’re lying. It smells overly sweet and it smells like death.

I wonder if Nana-Bee and Papa know that I’m here. Maybe Jonathan told them…

I hope his wounds are healing.

When I get the chance, I’m going to beat Duke’s skull until the bone marrow is not longer recognizable.

I smirk at the thought as I swirl my finger around the ice in my cup. “I wonder if his body will twitch when I do it?” I mutter as I place the cup down and stare at the iron bars of my cell.

I duck my head down as I hear footsteps approaching. “Are you hungry?” I hear a voice call out to me. I lift my head up and my eyes meet a pair of baby blue diamonds. “All depends, can I take that meal to go?” I answer him as I stand on my feet and walk close to the bars. He gives me a gentle smile.

“You know I would let you go in a heartbeat but-”

“But the people here are convinced that I am a peculiar woman. I’ve proven that I’m not. I’ve touched these iron bars, and my skin hasn’t burned. I’ve let my feet touch salt and my soul hasn’t been damned. I’m innocent and you know that Coriolanus.” I tell him. He gives me a stern sigh.

“Duke still isn’t convinced. He still thinks you’re lying.” I throw my hands in the air. “Because of my eyes? My not yellow but boring brown eyes?”

“I don’t think your eyes are boring.” Coriolanus comments making me narrow my eyes at him. “Are you flirting with me, Coriolanus?” He shakes his head and gives me a smirk. “Why would I flirt with a devilish woman such as yourself?”

There it is, the electricity in the air between us. I don’t know when this flirtatious banter had started, maybe on the second day? But I’ve notice the special attention Coriolanus gives me.

He always gives me extra food. He makes sure I get to some time to stretch my legs when no one is looking. To anyone else he would seem endearing.

But his blue eyes hold something cold in them. So I play this game, I let him flirt with me because I do get benefits and it helps that he was cuter than Bugs and way more attractive than Duke.

Funny enough I always like to test my limits with him. Just to see how far he’ll let me go with this little dance.

“How about you let me out of here and I can simply show you what this devilish woman can do.” I say as I trail a finger across my swollen bosom.

His eyes drop down for a second too long and when his eyes travel back to my face he leans in. “How do I know you won’t escape?” He asks in a husky whisper as he reaches up and twirls one of my locs between his fingers.

“You’ll never know until you let me out of this cage.” The corner of his lip quips up and he cocks his head to the side. “I quite like you in the cage. You remind me of this golden flower that my Grandma’am would keep in a vase. It was a beauty but if she lift the glass vase from it, the golden rose would wither away in minutes.”

“So you see me as a weak flower?” He shakes his head. “On the contrary I see you as something precious that needs to be preserved.” I nod and pluck my loc from his touch.

“Funny I just think you like to look at me in this cell so that you know where I am at all times.”

“That is not true. Besides watching someone in a cell is quite boring and reminds me of the games.” He retorts. “I think it wouldn’t be boring to watch me if you had something worth watching.” I say as I take a few steps back and sit down on the stone bench. He studies me as I let a smile dance across my lips.

“Maybe if you got to watch me…satisfy myself.” I tease as I lift my skirt. His gaze was trained on my every move as I raise the skirt past my brown thighs. I run my fingers against my inner thighs and let out a soft moan.

“Am I worth watching now, Coriolanus, darling?” I moan out to him. I watch him lick his bottom lip and see a tent starting to form in his pants.

He leans in closer towards thebars and looks behind himself to make sure no one was there. “You’re going to get me in trouble Evangeline.” He says as he cups himself as he looks back at me. “Then stop watching me. Or try to stay quiet, because I’m going to give you a show.” I slide a two fingers under my panties and I hear him groan as I move my fingers away and show him how slick my fingers are.

“I guess I was wetter than I thought.” I tease as I flick my tongue against my fingers. I can see he wants nothing more than to taste me.

Hell I’m sure if I told him to unlock the cell he would do it without hesitation.

I spread my legs wider and I slide the two digits inside of me, watching him rub himself. “You know you’ll only get in trouble if you get caught in here with me, but I’m sure you wouldn’t care about the punishment as long as you’d get to taste me. Am I right Coriolanus?”

“I would want nothing more than to taste every inch of your body, Evangeline. From head to toe.” I watch him rub himself harder and I close my eyes to enjoy my self pleasure but Coriolanus clears his throat.

“Don’t close those pretty brown eyes. I want them on me when you pleasure yourself. I want to be the only thing you look at when you reach ecstasy.” I let out a groan as I work my fingers on my clit.

He reaches into his pants pocket, surely to get out the keys when we both hear footsteps approaching. I quickly stop and smooth my skirt back down.

Someone clears their throat behind Coriolanus but he doesn’t turn to them. “What?” He says in a tone a little too calm for my liking. “You’re needed in the bunks, Coryo.” They tell him. “I’ll be there. You can go.” The foot steps leave and I give him a sly smile.

“Sorry for interrupting your duties. I’ll behave next time.” He doesn’t return the smile. He just stares at me for a pregnant pause.

“Don’t be sorry, I chose to be here. And I don’t regret it one bit. But I must apologize for the interruption. I have to go. Maybe we can continue this later.” He goes to walk away but I clear my throat, stopping him in his tracks.

“If I’m going to be here for a while, I do hope we get to have some private time together, Coriolanus. There are some…talents I do want to show you, without interruptions.” My eyes flicker to the bugle in his pants and when I look back up I see his blue eyes darken with want.

“Don’t worry, I’ll make sure we have more time when I come to visit you again.” He leaves and I watch him go feeling a bit light headed. I close my eyes for a few minutes and when I open them I let out a breathe. “Evangeline what are you doing?” I ask myself in pure wonder as I look down at my cup of water.

It was after supper time and I was looking at the potato soup as if it were a bomb that would go off at any second. “Nana-Bee’s sunflower stew sounds good about now.” I mutter as I push the bowl away. I nibble on the hard roll and see Sinder, a sweet older lady who was assigned to bring me to the mess room, come right on time.

“Ready?” She asks as she motions me to come to her. I give a slight nod and I go to her, making sure I don’t spook her as she unlocks my cell. “To take a bath like regular folks? Always, Sin.” I give her a kind smile and she returns one back as she escorts me out. As we head down the hall I take a chilled breathe.

“How’s the baby coming along?” I ask Sinder as she leads me further down. She touches her swollen belly then. “He’s coming along nicely. Due in December, so he’ll be a winter baby.”

“That’s nice, make sure when he’s born you bathe him in warm milk so he’ll have warm skin. My Nana-Bee, says it’s nothing worse than having a baby in winter. If they catch the frost they’ll cry and get colic.” I tell her.

“I’ll do just that. Thank you, Evangeline. You know, I don’t believe what they say about you, you’re just different is all.”

I like Sinder, she’s sweet and she makes me feel as if she could be my sister if circumstances were different.

She brings me to the baths and she turns around to give me some privacy as I strip off my clothes and ease my body into the luke warm water. “Evangeline, can I ask something of you?” Sinder asks as she picks up my clothes and folds them for me. “Anything, you know it’s rude to deny a woman with child.” I tell her.

She gives a soft smile. “I have to check in with my sisters, can I trust that you’ll be fine without me for a few minutes?” I nod like an obedient child. “I’ll be here, I won’t run. Besides there’s chill in the air, I’d catch my death if I leave like this.” She nods and she quietly leaves me alone.

I rub the cheap soap against my brown skin and let out a soft sigh. I let myself duck underneath the water and let the silence surround me.

Maybe it would be easy if I just drowned in this bathtub. Then these people can find my body and feel guilty for taking me away from my family. However I wouldn’t want Sinder to be the one to find me.

As the morbid thoughts seep through my brain I feel a burn in my lungs. My body twitches under the water and I break the surface and take in a mouth full of air.

Something in the air was off, almost as if someone’s presence was near. I swirl my fingers in the water and stare at the door. “Seems awfully rude of you to watch a lady while she’s having an intimidate moment.” I call out as I feel someone watching me.

I stare harder at the door and feel annoyed that whomever is behind it thinks I’m an idiot. “Might as well come out.” I call out once more. The door slowly opens and behind it was Coriolanus. The scowl on my face disappears and I sit up as he steps into the room and closes the door behind him. “I went to your cell and I didn’t see you there.” Coriolanus confesses with a tinge of red in his cheeks.

I give a dramatic pout and lean on the side of the bath, not caring that my breasts were on full display to him. “Awe, and you thought I ran away? Careful people might think you care about me, Coriolanus.” I say as I watch his eyes roam over parts of my naked flesh.

“And what if I do care? What’s the harm in that?”His eyes lock onto mine and I feel as if I’m in the room with the beast.

That’s a ridiculous thought, this is just Coriolanus, the same Coriolanus that treats me well and has a liking for me.

“All depends, do you care about my wellbeing or just my body?” I ask as I lean back looking at him carefully. His eyes look down and when they look back up they seem to darken a shade darker. He takes a step further into the room which makes me want to back away from him but I make my body stand still.

What is going on here?

“Why do you do that?” He asks, the question catching me off guard. “Do what?” I ask innocently. “Tease and tempt me? I could take advantage of you right now and no one would know.” I swallow before answering.

“I would know, and maybe I want you to take advantage of me a little. Don’t think I haven’t noticed how you stare at me, Coriolanus. Like how your eyes linger on my tongue when I lick my silverware clean after my meals. Or how when you cuff me, your hands brush against my skin longer than it should. I fascinate you, and I probably haunt your dreams.” I say as I cup water in my hands and slash it over my face.

“You do haunt my dreams, and my nightmares I’m afraid. But if I could sleep and see your beauty then may I never awaken again.” I blush hearing that compliment and it let a bit of my guard down. “You really know how to lay on the charm.” I comment as I reach for the sponge to wash myself. I wasn’t fast enough because he had plucked the sponge out of my reach. “Please allow me.” He says as he walks behind me.

I go to tell him that it wasn’t necessary but he was already rubbing small circles against my shoulder blades. Which were stiff from sleeping on the hard cot in my cell. I relax and let him work my muscles.

“You’re quite tense, especially here.” He reaches lower and I keep my moans to myself. “That feels nice, really nice. You are talented with your hands, Coriolanus.” I tell him as he lathers up the sponge and goes to rub my lower back.

“It’s a talent among many that I possess.” He comments. I turn to him then and look up at his face. “You know, you are quite beautiful for a man, Coriolanus.” He blushes and looks away. “Thank you, though I don’t think men want to be called beautiful.” I give a shrug. “There are beautiful men and there are handsome women. That’s just how the world is.”

“I like the way you look at the world, you seem to have a fresh perspective on it.” He comments as I study his face. “Mmm, can I ask you something? And you have to answer me honestly.”

“Of course.”

“Does your lover ever get jealous that you spend time with me?” He stops and looks at me puzzled. “I don’t have a lover.” It shouldn’t come as a shock by the way he flirts, but it was a big puzzling to know that he didn’t have a lover. He is quite a looker and his eyes were just gorgeous.

“You don’t? Well that’s quite sad.” He shakes his head. “I don’t think so. Besides if it’s so sad, why don’t you be my lover?” I expected him to ask me that question.

“I don’t think you’ll want me after a while, I am quite the wild card.” He leans in close and move my hair behind my shoulder. “I think I’d want to keep your forever. Would you let me? Keep you that is.”

“I don’t know, give me a good reason I should be kept by you.” I tease. He nods slightly and he places the sponge down. “Not only do you haunt me, but I crave you. I crave to know your taste on my tongue. I crave to feel your body pressed against mine. If there is one thing I want it’s to keep you for all of eternity.” He lets his hands touch my chin and I feel him tug at my lower lip, releasing it from my teeth.

“Why are you doing this to me?” I ask as I feel him pull me closer. “So you’ll say yes. Say yes and be mine, Evangeline. Be my little rose.” He leans in and fight hard to not fall for his charm. “I don’t think I will.”

He narrows his eyes at me. “I suppose I have to use stronger measures then.” With a swift skill, he takes me out of the bathtub and sits me on the edge. “What are you-“ He interrupts me by trailing his fingers down my slit. “You know I’ve been thinking about this little pretty pussy all day. When I had some alone time, I touched myself and thought about you on your knees, taking this down your throat.” He places my hand on his bulge and I let a moan escape my lips.

“Do you know how badly I want this inside of you? In every hole that you’ll allow me to have access too, Evangeline? But first I need to be a gentleman and show you that I will adore the very ground you walk on.” I watch as he lowers himself on his knees and parts my legs.

I wants as he leans in and he inhales my scent deeply. I bite my lip as I see his blue eyes look up at me. “Those moans you were making earlier, I want you to only make those sounds for me. You see, Evangeline. I am a jealous lover and I don’t like sharing what’s mine. So you can’t moan for any other man but for me. Do you understand?” He asks as he massages my inner thighs.

“I think so.” I whimper as I feel my cunt move towards his mouth. “No thinking, say yes, to me my little rose.”

“What if someone catches us?” I ask my mind slowly caring less about Sinder and more about Coriolanus’ mouth. “Don’t worry about that, just focus on me.”

He kisses my pussy lips which cause a slight shiver down my core. The kiss deepens and I feel him use his tongue to part my lips.

I feel my head loll back but his hand finds my throat and I know without words, he wants me to watch. He wants me to watch him devour me.

His fingers tighten a bit but the action was more for pleasure than for pain. I bite my lip, as I continue to watch as he assaults my pussy with his long tongue. His name seems to sing off of my lips as I find a blissful rhythm with my hips.

I reach down and place both of my hands on the sides of his head as I push his face deeper. God his tongue was working wonders on my little throbbing clit.

His eyes flutter closed and I move my hips faster. I feel the balls of my feet press into his thighs as I try to keep balance but I almost lose it when I feel his tongue flick against the hood of my clit faster.

I let out a sharp whimper as he uses his free hand and pressed my left thigh further apart. He then takes his middle and ring finger and does a come here motion inside of me. Massaging my g-spot as well as giving long and salacious licks to my now tightening clit.

“Oh god..” I cry out as I buck my hips harder against his now swollen lips and tongue. His eyes glare up at me as if to dare me to lose control and give him what he desires.

He wants me to say yes.

Shit I can almost taste the word on the tip of my tongue.

I feel his grip on my neck tighten as well as the muscles in my lower stomach. I hook him closer to me as if I want him buried into my skin as I fuck his mouth.

Not caring that we could get caught. No longer caring that he is slowly cutting off my air supply. I want him to make me come, I want to give him the very thing he wants. “Yes…Coriolanus..” Is all I can manage to say before I have tunnel vision. I feel light headed as I come against his tongue. I hear him moan and suck as he releases my throat from his dangerous hand.

I suck in air as he grips my hips and he drinks in all of me. My body shivers but not from the chill in the air. But from the heat that he was giving off of his body. When he looks up at me, he has a very pleased look on his face. He flicks his tongue one more time and I shiver from the action.

When Coriolanus stands up I feel my body wanting to lean in to him, as if he’s a magnet and I’m just a scrap of metal being pulled in his direction. I still my body to keep from falling into him.

His pupils blow out, causing the blue in his eyes to almost disappear. He then licks his bottom lip and reaches out to me. I lean into his touch and he smiles. “My loving little rose.” He whispers to me as he lifts my white loc and twirls it between his fingers.

I say nothing and just look up at him. Something isn’t right, I feel as if I just gave him a piece of my soul and now I’m going to be damned for eternity.

When I finally go to speak we hear a gasp. I turn slightly to see Sinder with a shocked expression on her face. “You’re not allowed in here.” She tells Coriolanus.

“I came in here to check on our guest. And to my surprise I see she was left all alone. What would’ve happened had she had drowned? Then you’d be the one having to be punished. I’ll let it slide this one time. But if it happens again you’ll be the one who will be chosen for the next Reaping and I’ll be sure of it.” Coriolanus says in a frosted tone.

He looks back at me and I see a ghost of a smile on his lips. “We’ll talk later, Evangeline.” He sends a soft kiss against my temple and leaves the both of us in the mess room.

When the coast is clear, Sinder walks over to me with a towel and she starts apologizing profusely. “I am so sorry Evangeline, I was only gone for a moment. He didn’t hurt you did he?”

“No, I don’t think he would’ve anyways.” I say as I dry off my body and get dressed. But also not feeling sure that I believe what I just told her. “I would be mindful of that particular Peace Keeper. He’s charming but I’ve heard rumors, that when he takes interests in one of the girls, he likes to play with them until they break.”

She brings me back to my cell and I tell her good night as she gives me one more apology.

It falls to silence and I take my cup and I swirl what liquid I had left in it. “I hope he knows fire can be a bit difficult to break.” With those whispered words, I stare into the cup and dip my fingers into the liquid. As I raise my fingers into the moon light I see flames slowly licking my finger tips. I flick my tongue against them and I smile in the dark corner of my cell.

“Well when you play with fire, you tend to get burned…”

Next

[come-down-that-tree]

Prologue Previous

Warning: Geno being loopy for a while and discutable editing choices

Come Down That Tree! (An aftermare story)

Chapter 15: Audio, sed terra cur non plana est?

Geno wakes up not feeling quite all there.

His arm didn’t hurt anymore and he felt rested.

Something is amiss but who cares? Life is fun!

He felt very giddy for no apparent reason. The air seemed to vibrate.

He sits. Oh, he sits alright. With his butt on the ground. His back against the bark. His hands politely wait on his legs.

Geno felt like the universe rewrote itself slightly to the left just to mess with him.

Something makes a soft noise right to his left and he is suddenly very aware of a weight loafed against him.

It was Nightmare who was still asleep.

He shakes his arm to remove the weight.

The other started to stir awake, sleepiness still very present in his gaze.

Why does he wear so much purple? Like his eyes? He wears them prettily.

He moved around and watched Nightmare’s mouth articulate.

“Are you feeling okay? Your eyelight is big…?”

It is? He needs to see that.

Geno tried to reach his eye socket with his left arm but Nightmare stopped him for some reason.

“I know it doesn’t feel painful right now but it is still injured so try to avoid using it?”

Nightmare is too long of a name and Geno says so to him. He thinks.

“Oh your enunciation… It’s alright, the bigger side effects should fade out soon! It did for me…even if you don’t seem to react quite like me then… If Nightmare is too hard to say, you can shorten it to “Night” or anything that you prefer?”

He gazed into the two pale purple moons and attempted to test his balance by standing up straight. He failed.

The ground is green and he is floating above it.

He fell on the other.

“AH! Try to stay still for a moment, will you?”

Moonlight is so loud.

“I’ll try to be more quiet… If I dare to point that out, “Moonlight” is in no way shorter than “Nightmare”...”

The sound he makes is funny.

Geno flayed a bit to get back to sit against the tree without crushing anyone.

Moon is there but where is the other?

“Dream is down the village, you slept for a while.”

Mind Reading, what a powerful and useful magic…

He stared at him and the way his hands were freezed in the air, as if hesitant -he glanced at his face- and lost.

“You’re not aware you’re talking out loud, are you?”

Aware is certainly not the word here.

“We should get you out of these clothes… Dream went to seek some for you, it must be uncomfortable for you… wearing something that wet and heavy…?”

His sleeves make satisfying sounds when shaken.

The monster was drenched. Unlike Nightmare who seemed already dry and back in his usual purple trousers.

Geno knows a funny way to get dry much faster.

“Wait, what are you doing?”

With a firm but clumsy hand, he carries out his plan.

And soon, one giant animalistic skull was floating in front of both of them.

“GENO, please tell me you know what you’re doing with that terrifying thing!”

Feeling like some marbles were back into place, he answered the question truthfully.

“I don’t know what I am doing but I am doing it.”

Somehow, it did not seem to reassure the other who looked ready to leap at the first sign of something going wrong. The monster couldn’t care less at the moment and gestured for his blaster to open its maw…and charge a blast.

Somehow, once again, it seemed to inflict more stress on his companion. He then ignored all the pleading babbles that were just plain grating.

The inside of the blaster started lighting up with a fierce heat and he carefully sat between two sharp teeth.

“The’e, I will b’ dry inno time”, he announced to his gobsmacked-looking spectator.

Nightmare stayed where he was -even after he patted the space beside him in a silent offer- therefore he elected to ignore him, focusing on the almost scaling heat against his back. Why did he never do that before? It was quite a great way to accelerate things.

“Are you sure this is safe? Have you done that before?”

“I have never been lass sure of anything in me life but it seems to work a’right!”

The other scrunched his face in an expression Geno couldn’t decipher, not like he was that interested in trying but still.

After a moment of silence, the not-monster scooted slightly closer. He remained fairly far however.

“What is it?”

“mmmh m’blaster.”

“What? Can you repeat that?”

He giggled at the other’s ignorance.

“Big thing thaaat shoots and.. and bites!”

“Very helpful, thanks.”

He bowed, almost fell out of his seat, then miraculously balanced himself back up.

“M’pleasure to help, aways.”

“I thought you were starting to sound cognizant again but I see I was wrong there.”

“Always the bug words with you, eh”, he shrugged.

“Seriously, what is this thing? It was so impressive and -honestly- scary last time and now it just sits there, floating and warming your back without mauling you for sitting right next to its sharp and huge canine.”

Geno shook his head a few times to try once again to realign the realities. If the endeavor was any conclusive, he didn’t have a clue. He would have to continue riding the wave until it fully went away, he guessed.

“I use magic and fwoop big puppy here comes.”

He really couldn’t explain it any better.

“...Your magic seems far more powerful and advanced from anything I saw from monsters so far.”

“Is that so?”

“Yes.”

“What can you do besides turning into a nightlight at will?”

Nightmare grabbed his knees and started softly rocking back and forth.

“Not much… I can slightly worsen feelings on the bad side but I hate doing that. I’ve been told I turn the mood sour just by standing there so I might do it unconsciously sometimes.”

A frigid feeling finished chasing the daze away, leaving only a slight light-headedness and a dull pain in his left arm.

“Did the villagers tell you that?”

“Yes…”

“Then I wouldn’t trust that source.”

“Geno…They’re not all that bad.”

“Don’t give me that crap. It’s not about me there, they’re obviously mistreating you.”

The purple-clad skeleton hid his head in his knees and hummed, neither confirming or denying his accusation.

“Did you talk about that with Dream?”

Nightmare shook his head but stayed buried there.

“You don’t have to answer that but allow me to put an hypothesis out. The villagers don’t like you because they think your little guardianship here is neatly devised between “good and bad” and they’d be better off with only the positive and none of the negative emotions?”

A timid nod was all he got in exchange but it was enough for him to continue.

“1-I honestly don’t fully understand the whole tree and apples thing but aren’t you just a guardian and the sources of the feelings are the apples?

2-They’re plain stupid if they think they can live with only one side of their emotions. What are they, 5???”

To that, Nightmare lifted his head to look at him.

“Emotions are not a coin you can flip! They aren’t even always positive or negative? Some are neutral or mixed and why are they oversimplifying such a vague concept.”

“I don’t think I ever heard that way of thinking before.”

“You’re surrounded by idiots, no offense to Dream since I guess you didn’t broach the subject with him. Which is strange when you’re so fixated on “your duties as guardians of feelings”?”

“I’m starting to think I prefer you loopy.”

“How dare!??”

He let himself fall forwards, colliding with the other for the second time today but this time on his own volition. The blaster dissolved into the air as the air grew thick with shrieks and laughter as they play-fought on the ground. It ended very fast when something brushed weird against his arm and he all but hissed of pain.

“Oh no, did the pain come back? Are you feeling fine?”

The pain receded without fully vanishing so he answered it was alright enough.

They both laid down for a moment, looking at the clouds.

The faraway white puffs were a fascinating phenomenon to observe and he idly wondered if he would ever get used to it.

“I still think you should talk about it to your brother.”

“If I do that, he’s gonna want to help. We can’t just move the tree elsewhere if worse comes to worse. I don’t want them to hate him too.”

“You’re afraid he would get hurt for you? Or are you scared he wouldn’t do anything if he knew?”

“NO! I know he would- He’s the kindest person I’ve ever met. Of course, he would help or try to at least.”

“I see, you should still try to talk to him in my opinion.”

“...and what if you minded your own business?”

“Ha, I could.”

“Any particular reason you don’t?”

Geno sighed, a deep and heavy sigh that dragged for what seemed like an eternity.

“You somehow remind me of myself, just a bit, and a… situation… I went through. It’s a very, and I mean it, very different situation but I didn’t want to talk to my brother about it either. I did in the end, but let’s say it didn’t really stick, so just forget that.

Nightmare responded with a delay.

“You have a brother…”

“A little brother and despite everything, I’ll keep him close in my heart. Always...”

“Do you miss him?”

The answer was easy but somehow complicated.

“I do. Thankfully Papyrus does not.”

A long silence stretched after that.

A timid question stopped it just as steps approaching made their presence known.

“Would you mind talking to me about Papyrus more later?”

And strangely, Geno found he truly didn’t.

End of chapter 15! Go to chapter 16?

@dragon-tamer-1 @shinechermont

Geno!Sans belongs to @/loverofpiggies

Nightmare and dreamtale belong to @/jokublog