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SPITTIN' OUT LIKE LISTERINE ─ RIN I.

synopsis: sae is great at a lot of things, his brother... not so much. when sae calls you up to tutor rin for his upcoming exams the first thought should've been 'yeah, sounds like easy money' rather than 'why does it look like he wants to kill me right now'.

MILESTONE EVENT || MILESTONE MASTERLIST

contents: gn!reader, reader is two grades above rin, college AU setting, forced proximity, best friend's brother, rin is a lil emotionally constipated but its alright bc we love him, sae is a physics major in this idk why word count: 10.9k (haha... why do i do this) a/n: hi hi umm idk if i know how to write tbh its been quite some time,,, but im slowly finding myself getting back into the groove and umm yeah it'll still take some time!! anyways, thank you for beta'ing @popponn and of course this fic is dedicated to you too my sweet <3

You meet Itoshi Rin at a coffee shop, of all places.

The kind of shop that you often see campus influencers hanging around. Hole in the wall. Dangling fairy lights paired with a few overgrown rose bushes in the front. A bit old-schooled, wooden counter tops, with well loved espresso machines. It’s not a big cafe, just enough to hold a few couches, a singular bookshelf packed with all sorts of board games, and low rise tables with way too many heat stains. 

At the start of the year, it started out as a quiet job. Never too overwhelming and had just enough downtime for you to finish up assignments in between breaks. Recently, due to a couple of self-proclaimed foodies on campus, business has blown up ten-fold. So, instead of catching up on your latest lectures, you’re stuck brewing teenage girls their overpriced lattes that are just mostly multiple pumps of flavored syrup and copious amounts of whipped cream. It’s rough but manageable to say the least, judging from the tips. 

You’re currently on scholarship, top of your classes and major, but you’re also living on your own so rent’s gotta get paid one way or another. Whether it be working part-time as a teaching assistant, a barista, or both.

On this particular day, you’re just about done closing up shop. The last hour had you rushing back and forth, fulfilling a last minute order from a Karen that swore up and down that she placed a mobile app order for ten frappuccinos twenty minutes prior. It’s been a long day, but the evening has finally calmed down. You’re scrubbing down the counter, putting all the remaining elbow grease you have into this one particular syrup spill earlier that you didn’t realize that someone had walked in until they started clearing their throat.

You barely look up, having the stain just almost disappear from the counter, but the information you register is enough to know that it’s a guy, and he’s by himself. 

And, okay, in a normal setting you would probably be smart enough to realize that a guy wearing a black cap, oversized hoodie, and a large gym bag at nearly nine o’clock at night is anything but suspicious. You, however, worked a long day. Your eyes are strained from operating the bright tablet menu. Your hair is a frenzied mess. There’s tea stains all over your apron. You get the gist.

So you don’t really notice at all, except that this guy is idling in front of the counter, looking over at the menu with equally strained eyes as you. That’s not unusual. You’ve learned when to be helpful and when to give someone their time and space. It’s slow now, not like it’s common for more customers to show up this late anyway. 

After a moment, the customer clears his throat again. You turn around, fixing your apron, and work up a friendly smile and a quick “ready to order?” when it dawns upon you that this guy is breathtakingly gorgeous. So much so that if you could take over the rights of the Oxford Dictionary, you would attach this guy’s face underneath the word gorgeous and emo.

Dark wispy bangs, striking teal eyes, long mesmerizing lashes, and lips that naturally fall into a small frown giving him the ultimate resting bitch face. They’re also very kissable lips, and you hate yourself for jumping to that thought so fast. It’s not usual for you to hit on customers, let alone just anyone, and it’s probably safe to say that anyone as handsome as The Duke of the North (because you’ve also been reading too many romance comics on the side and this stranger definitely fits this role) probably has a partner of his own. 

“Hey,” The Duke of the North looks awkwardly pained, as if he hates starting a conversation. His eyes drift down to your name tag that’s proudly displayed on your apron, littered with all sorts of stickers and pins. “I—um, what do you recommend?”

Working in food service made you absolutely hate this question with a burning passion. Everyone’s taste is subjective. You get this question all the damn time, and you have to put on your best customer service act, all preppy and bubbly. It’s not like you hate helping customers, you do. But, when they don’t give you anything to work with, it becomes your fault if the drink is bad. 

Though, for obvious reasons, you don’t mind extending the conversation with The Duke of the North. Just by glance alone, you can tell he’s a bit of a health nut from the lean physique and the hefty gym bag that’s tossed around his shoulders. Looks scary and a little daunting, but you have an inkling feeling he’s more of a traditional type of guy. 

“If you want popular suggestions then I’d rec our brown sugar boba for beginners or, if you want something less sweet, I always prefer our in house rose oolong milk tea.” You answer, good-naturedly.

The Duke of the North seems to be in deep pondering. The look on his face makes you feel a little uneasy, like maybe he’s missing something, but eventually he settles with the latter.  “Rose oolong,” He says thoughtfully, almost unfamiliar with the term. “I’ll have that then.”

“It’s one of our signature drinks,” you ring in his order with a smile, “tends to be popular with a lot of the older women.” There’s tease laced in the tone, but you mean no harm. Maybe just a tiny amount for him coming in before closing. 

And, after collecting the cash payment, you can tell that he’s struggling with the awkwardness hanging in the air. You assume he’s not used to jokes, or even hanging around others willingly for that fact. There was another comment you wanted to ask, more so his background and if he goes to the same university, but it quickly vanishes when the guy scurries to the furthest corner of the shop. 

Okay, that’s fine too. Not everyone is suited for small talk.

You get the feeling that this guy wants to avoid people and maybe he’s also had one hell of a day. You’ve learned pretty early on as a barista to never ask anyone about their problems, only because you’ll accidentally sign up to become their therapist without meaning to. 

You decide to brew up a warm batch of rose oolong tea, despite the fact he never specified if he wanted it hot or iced - he looks like the type of guy to always order a warm drink, even on a summer day. And, being the lovely barista you are, you decide to give him a large for the hell of it. This will go down as your one positive action for today, hoping that the good luck will carry over for tomorrow’s rough schedule.

“Hope you like it,” you present him with the tea and watch him as he swirls the drink around. He doesn’t look upset that it’s warm, so you take that as a good sign. “Feel free to hang back a little, I still have to clean up a couple of things in the back.”

“Sure, thanks,” he nods, and the words sound genuine. Without missing a beat, he retreats back in the corner and pulls out a laptop, notebook, and somehow manages to balance the drink on the cushion next to him. Yeah, definitely a fellow student working overtime like you.

True to your word, you go back to your boring list of chores to do; tons of equipment to be sanitized, chalkboard to be erased and be replaced by tomorrow’s daily specials, counting the register, taking out all the trash… maybe it’s not too late to find a less taxing job.

If you weren’t so tunnel visioned in your deep cleaning, maybe you would’ve noticed The Duke of the North spilling some of the tea on himself, asking if you had some extra tissues he could borrow, but only growing self-cautious when he realized that your earbuds are shoved in. And maybe you’d notice him cleaning up the spill with his own clothes from the gym bag, dabbing the spot furiously and making sure it looked like the same state prior. 

You’re almost done with your long list of closing chores when The Duke of the North returns with an empty cup. “Thanks, again. ‘S was good,” he awkwardly offers up.

“Glad to hear,” you flush a little, because your uniform is a mess, and you clearly look the part still. Nothing is more embarrassing than a cute guy staring down at you while you’re sweaty, tired, and have soap suds all over your apron.

There’s a bit of a silence, and then he says, even more awkwardly, “I’ll, uh, see you around. Good night.”

“Sure,” you reply in a quiet voice, in a tone that’s taken on a dreamy sort of quality. “Night.”

You let out a ragged sigh by the time he was out of sight, praying to see him again in better circumstances. By the time you’re locking the front door, you’re half debating to FaceTime your best friend about the random encounter. Somehow, Sae tends to know just about everyone on campus, even if his friend group only extends out to you. Though, noting that it’s nearly midnight and you should really catch the last bus of the day, you quickly toss that thought out the window and save the energy for tomorrow’s session.

“Mind tutoring my brother for me?” Sae asks out of the blue the next day.

You flail a little, shooting him an exasperated look over your shoulder as your fingers stop in mid hover over the keys of your laptop. An hour and a half into the TA grading session and somehow things feel slightly more off than yesterday night. 

There’s only one single thought running through your mind as you stare at Sae, best friend of nearly two years, “You have a brother?!”

A swarm of “shh” and “quiet down” soon blows in your direction in the library. You’re quickly met with glares from other senior students from nearby tables and study rooms as you mumble back flurries of “sorry” while Sae only rolls his eyes.

It’s nearing midterms, everyone and their mothers are camped on every floor and crevice of the building, thus making gossiping quite impossible and frowned upon. So you stare in disbelief at your friend on the wild fact that he potentially has a brother and didn’t bother telling you until now. 

Sae blinks, “…Yeah? That’s shocking news to you?”

You laugh a little sheepishly, “You’ve never mentioned having one, let alone anything familial.” Then again, this is Sae. Talk about emotionally guarded. 

“You’ve never asked,” Sae huffs before setting down a stack of graded papers. At the top, you see an unfortunate student’s work marred in everything red from Sae’s corrections. He’s always been a tough grader and, for any poor soul who has to take physics, chances of them retaking are high when he’s TAing.

“No offense, but you’ve always given me only child vibes,” you say, lamely, not hiding the fact you’re mildly annoyed. Seriously, this guy knows just about everything about your personal life and now you’re just finding out about his?

“All offense taken,” he replies dryly. 

You scoot closer and whisper, “So, who’s the unlucky guy?”

Sae heaves, ignoring your comment, and continues, “Rin. He’s been focusing too much on sports lately to care about his midterms. He knows about the arrangement. I would offer to tutor him but… we don’t have the best sibling relationship.”

And, Sae being Sae, this doesn’t really surprise you. “See? The only child vibe checks out.”

“Anyways,” Sae rolls his eyes for the nth time and tosses you a half folded sticky note with the name and contact info of his presumed brother. “He gets his shitty attitude from me, so try not to get too upset if he doesn’t seem talkative.”

“I haven’t even given my answer to—”

“Just how often do I ask for your help?”

“Like never,” your reply is instant and Sae only raises his brows in confirmation. You take that as a sign of he’ll somehow return the favor. It’s a rare opportunity, perhaps even once in a blue moon, but there is just one thing that you’re wondering about—

“Don’t worry about the money, you’re going to be covered,” Sae reassures as he throws another thick stack of exams on top of the finished pile. “He’s a fast learner when he wants to be, just not as of recently since he’s started the semester.”

“I take it he’s a grade below?”

“About two years younger, in honors.”

You laugh, pulling away and readjusting your attention back to your laptop screen. “Seems smarter than you, I like him already.”

It’s a terrible day, because you’re awake before your alarm. Hell, you’re awake before sunrise.

It’s absolutely nonsense and your boss knows to stop giving you these opening and closing shifts back to back, but apparently nobody else had been available to open. 

“You’re competent,” your boss had said over the phone last night. “I trust you more than our own managers, so you should at least feel proud about that.”

Should you?

Of course, you don’t fall for his stupid flattery, not when your alarm is finally blasting in your ear at five in the morning. Normally, you at least try to make yourself look half-presentable but, working on approximately four hours of sleep, the best you could do for yourself is throw on a sweater and jeans before heading out the door.

As a whole, you really do like your job and usually get the later shift but the recent manager got fired for stealing cash from the register, and your other co-worker called off for the next few weeks due to a family emergency, so now your life is a living hell — at least until they return. And, let’s not forget to mention that somehow you’re also stuck with tutoring your classmate’s younger brother because somehow he couldn’t have done it himself. Also a so-called “family emergency”. 

The only thing you appreciate is at least it’s warm inside the cafe once you’ve turned on the lights and tossed your bookbag in the back room. The store might be short-staffed today, but mornings are always slow, which only means you can at least get paid by watching some YouTube videos while finishing setting the place up.

You barely get through setting up the pastries when there’s a knock on the door. Dear god. It’s barely seven, you’ve been here for exactly fifty minutes, and already you’re debating smashing your face against the coffee machine to put yourself out of this misery. If it’s a customer, you swear you’re going to kill someone.

As you glare intently at the window, in the early morning, pre-dawn glow, you can make out a tall guy, dressed in athleisure, peering through the glass. You’re about to grumble out loud about entitled customers showing up before opening hours but the door knob suddenly turns, all because you were too tired earlier to lock it, so now you have to put on your dumb customer service voice. 

The bell chimes loudly as the guy walks in. The lighting in the coffee shop is low, with that quiet, comfortable ambience of soft piano background music playing through the speakers. Your eyes are still half-awake too, blurry around the edges with sleep. But that face, no one could possibly forget that.

“You’re back,” you say this in awe, offering up your best smile, even though it’s lopsided and droopy. The annoyance ebbs away slowly as the man approaches the counter.

The Duke of the North scratches his cheek, and looks around the cafe a bit more, realizing that he’s quite literally the only one here. “...Am I early?”

“Kinda, we open in thirty minutes,” you shrug. It’s not an accusatory thing, because at least this time he has the manners to come in before it’s open rather than before closing. That’s something you can work with. You were irritated earlier but now you’re suppressing a giggle. “Did you like the drink that much?”

Before he could answer, he tips his baseball cap and grips his bookbag before settling down on the nearest couch by the counter. Wondering if the comment had came out as off putting, you’re about to throw on a free pastry when—

“My brother recommended this cafe. Needed a quiet place to get some work done,” he explains with a slight pause, and continues, “The drink you made was good,” he says quietly and starts unpacking. For whatever reason, that puts a dumb cheesy grin on your face. You’re thankful he’s too occupied to catch that.

“Well, you’re welcome to stop by anytime. Just, you know, within actual store hours.” You laugh when you see the tips of his ear flushing a light shade of red. 

“I suppose you’re right,” and you don’t have to look at him to hear the tiny smile in his voice.

“Did you want me to make you anything?”

He shakes his head. “Nothing at the moment. Thank you.”

You two are quiet again for a long time. He’s minding your space while you’re trying to finish your opening duties. When you’re finally done fiddling with the coffee bean grinder, you twirl around, mind racing and checking off your internal checklist with the next task being to actually open the shop. Though, as you turn, The Duke of the North is already by the front door, flipping the sign over to OPEN. 

Can this guy get any more charming?

“Oh, you didn’t have to do that,” except that you totally loved the fact that he did just that. Maybe a concerning amount. 

“I was getting up anyways,” he reasons simply with a shrug. Somehow he slightly reminds you of a certain someone, but you ignore the nagging voice inside your head.

“Well, keep that up and we might just hire you,” you tease.

The Duke of the North strolls up to the counter, presenting a credit card in his hand, and looks over the menu behind you. You give him space, but you absolutely try to make out the name on the card. You probably shouldn’t refer to him as The Duke of the North any longer than you should. Then again, if the shoe fits, why change?

Suddenly, the front door bell rings and the sight of maroon catches your attention.

“Sae?”

“You’re here awfully early,” Sae comments, nonchalantly. 

You sigh, rubbing a hand to your temple. “Got moved to first shift, unfortunately.”

“Wasn’t talking to you, I was talking to him,” he nods towards The Duke of the North.

Blinking hastily, you choke out, “Wait, you two know each other?”

“Are you that blind?” Sae deadpans and stands next to the taller male, who looks mildly taken back, like somehow he doesn’t want to be here anymore. “This is Rin. The guy I was talking about yesterday. My brother.”

To say that you’re shocked might be an understatement. The correct emotion might’ve been appalled, or even dread? You’re not sure. But you weren’t expecting the meeting to be as unnerved as it was. Rin doesn’t even allow Sae to finish explaining, just ends up walking out with the promise of showing up to the shop at the end of your shift. You remember catching Sae’s irritated expression which, in itself, is extremely rare. It placed a strained smile on your face.

Back at your apartment, you’re currently trying to balance this tutoring session by turning it into a personal study time too. Though, you keep the sight of Rin in your peripheral as you complete your assignments in bed. It didn’t take you too long to look through his current curriculum and throw together a few practice and multiple choice questions for a quick knowledge assessment. He seemed pretty adamant about knowing everything, but Sae has his doubts.

Rin keeps looking over at his quiz, your digital clock, and the floor — all in that order. You don’t want to distract him anymore than he already is, though you can’t help but to spare a glance of what he has done so far. 

The multiple choice questions have been filled out, with a couple of eraser bits on the side, but the short answers have hardly been touched. A lofty attempt has been made to the first short answer, where Rin drew a small circuit diagram to determine the internal resistance of a battery, but it kinda just stops at that. Any answers he has written for the problem set are mostly brief notions of what’s already stated in the prompt. 

Rin currently has his fingers knotted in his hair, pencil tapping against the table and, underneath the desk, he’s bouncing his leg like mad.He tries to look indifferent on a surface level, but you can easily see the vein popping out on his neck.

By the time you’ve finished grading, Rin barely scrapes by with a C-. And, while some students would be ecstatic with that, it’s surely not enough to raise his current grade to a passing one. 

Sae mentioned that Rin’s a fast learner when he wants to be and he never said tutoring would be an easy job. No worries, it’s not the first time you had to mentor a student before. What you’re more worried about is how Rin had been so sure that he knew what he was doing… when he obviously doesn’t.

You hand back the paper with the corrected answers in red ink. You even drew a tiny smiley face by his name to give him some sort of comfort, but Rin just makes a disgruntled noise and looks mildly disgusted.

“I don’t need your sympathy.”

You certainly didn’t expect him to snap at you. Rin visibly tenses and blood rushes to your ears.

Your lips part, finding the right words, as he redirects his attention to your bedroom window and stretches his jaw. Then, after an agonizing long pause, he tips his head back, slouches down in the chair, and sighs in defeat. 

“Sorry,” his voice cracks a little and he leans down, resting his forehead on the edge of the table. 

You pinch your lips together, eyebrows raised. He looks frustrated, but you can tell it’s not aimed at you. “Let’s… take a fifteen minute break, how does that sound?”

“I think I should go.” He’s a little breathless, possibly uncomfortable under the weight of your stare. 

“I’m not delicate, Itoshi,” you say, slowly. You’ve dealt with a fair share of angst-ridden undergrads flustering over their assignments. Rin is no different, and you’re not the type to easily give up after a mini meltdown. It’s all about having the right approach, if you send him home now then the next session would just start off even more strained. “Stay for a while longer, we’ll go over everything one by one.”

“It’s fine.”

You sigh, lips curling ever so slightly. “Itoshi, has anyone told you that you’re a terrible liar?”

From the look on his face, it seemed like the world had slipped out from under his feet. You soon realize that Rin almost reminds you of a raging teen, when he’s like this. He’s fiercely independent, that’s for sure. The type that doesn’t like to make others worry but it ends up backfiring in the end. How he’s managed to get through with life is way beyond your comprehension, but you have a feeling that it has something to do with Sae.

“I… I don’t talk about stuff like this,” he admits and chews down on his lip - it seems like a nervous tick, a bad habit. 

“I can tell,” a chuckle bubbles from you but you pause when you catch his glare. You start clearing your throat awkwardly, “I—um, I don’t talk about my feelings often either. I don’t think many people do. We’re all trying to figure things out as we go.”

“Have you figured it out yet?” Rin seems to surprise himself with that question. 

Maybe for him, you look like you’ve got all your shit together. As if you’ve figured out all the great secrets in life. And maybe, you think, he just wants reassurance that he’s not alone, struggling, to find purpose. Or perhaps Rin wants you to offer up some adult advice, something only seniors would know. 

Your eyes widen for a moment. Rin furrows his brows tightly together and stares at you for answers. You both know well enough that you don’t have a solution, but he looks at you anyway. All you offer him back is a warm, big smile. 

“Itoshi, I’m two years older than you. I’ve had a little more years to figure it out,” you begin slowly, “I’ve had my ups and downs, almost flunked out a few courses when I was starting out, too. I didn’t just magically have it all come together.”

He appears doubtful, almost hard to believe. Rin looks like he’s about to protest but one look and he soon realizes that you’re pushing some truth there. You can tell that he’s struggling, mind working in overtime to try and process all of his internal conflicts — only because you’ve gone through the same. 

“Honestly,” you continue, after a long moment of silence, and lean to the side, giving Rin’s shoulder a little nudge, “It’s not my business to dig around your psyche, but just know that you’re welcome to tell me anything. Physics related or not.”

Rin doesn’t say a word, but you take his silence as a contentment. 

“So, uh,” you start to get up from the bed and pace towards the kitchen area, “I have some sliced fruit in the fridge, if you want some. Can’t solve these problems on an empty stomach.”

You two spend the rest of the night assessing the problems he got stuck on and going over shorthand tricks to easily remember what formulas to use. To your surprise, Rin stays mostly quiet and attentive this time around. He doesn’t stare at the worksheet in irritation anymore, and asks questions when he finds himself stuck on a problem. At the end, he manages a passing B on the new practice assessment. And, of course, while downing a bowl of freshly sliced honeydew.

It’s almost midnight by the time he starts heading out. You’re certain that this is going to kick you in the ass tomorrow morning, because you somehow forgot that you have an 8:00 AM class. It’s fine, you think, at least the atmosphere feels a lot lighter than when you guys first started, so you consider that as a plus.

As Rin begins to put on his shoes, you try to lean against the bedroom door casually and nearly fall over. Looking unimpressed, Rin looks up at you.

“Hm?”

“Do you dislike me?”

“You’d already be dead if I hated you,” Rin says this with a certain level of confidence that makes you both shiver and relax at the same time. You’re positive that he isn’t a serial killer but, then again, you don’t know if Sae is the only source of all that pent up angst. 

When his hand rests on the front door knob, Rin suddenly looks back, eyebrows knitted together, and you can’t tell what his expression translates into. Nevertheless, it makes your breath catch in your throat, and you swallow hard. 

“Yes, Itoshi?”

”You… your room is messy,” Rin eventually comments, very unnecessarily, which causes you to release a heavy sigh, sticking a disapproving tongue out.

“Wow, you really do get that shitty attitude from him!”

Rin just snorts, hands in his pockets, and you think this is the first time he’s ever really laughed. It throws you off and, before you get a proper chance to recover, he’s out the door. 

“You’re surprisingly getting the hang of this, Itoshi” you’re glossing over the practice quiz he had today, feeling a surge of pride knowing that Rin was able to handle it just fine. He ended up receiving a B minus, which is nearly a grade higher from his past averages. Guess a heated vent session is the answer to most problems. 

“I’ve cleared my head,” he shrugs nonchalantly, as if it’s the easiest thing to do in the world. 

Outside, a storm rages and rattles the windows every time thunder roars. Typhoon season is nearing as the weather starts to get warmer, which ultimately means your evening shifts are cut early to avoid flood risks and violent winds. It’s been about two weeks since the first tutoring session and there’s been a slow progression in your relationship. 

Having Rin over almost feels weirdly second nature, despite the short amount of time. You try to meet at least three times a week, two of those times happen right after your shift. The thing you miss the most about being a sophomore is the amount of free time you had. Rin’s classes practically finish before three every day and arrive at the coffee shop right after football practice everyday. Majority of the time, it would just be exchanging shorthand greetings but, whenever the evening rush dies down, you try to strike a quick check-in. Afterwards, the two of you  would make the trip back to your apartment to continue the session. 

Which leads to this current situation. 

About an hour into the session you suggested a well needed break, for you at least. You’re laying down in your bed, playing a mobile game on full volume, while Rin is disciplined enough to still scroll over his previous lecture slides at your desk. You’re not sure if this is what he does to “relax”, or if he’s just simply not grown comfortable around you just yet. Either way, it’s hard to believe that you’re being out mentored. 

“You know you can chill, right?”

“I know.” You hear muffled sounds of a lecture recording from his laptop. 

“Well, I don’t hear you chilling.”

“I don’t need to be.”

Okay, yeah, you’re starting to see the family resemblance here. But it’s going to take a lot more than that to stop you. How else have you survived as Sae’s best friend for two years?

“Don’t you have any fun weekend plans?” 

Rin shakes his head, eyes never leaving his screen. “Maybe not fun by your definitions.”

Your ears perk at this and you subtly lower the volume of the game. Maybe this is a sign to get to know his likes and dislikes, and whether or not he has a significant other — because that’s all important information. At least, that’s what you convince yourself. If Rin just so happens to be in a relationship, then you’ll easily set aside that growing curiosity. If he’s not, then a little harmless flirting won’t harm anyone, right?

“Itoshi,” you sit up from the bed with more purpose than before, Rin seems to catch on and visibly grimaces. “Tell me, I wanna know.”

“We should probably go back to studying,” he sighs.

You hop to your feet, sauntering to the desk and shutting his laptop with ease. Ohm’s Law can wait just a little while longer. “You’ve been at it nonstop since we’ve arrived here. It’s not good to cram everything in that big head of yours, that’s how people burn out faster. C’mon, a ten minute break won’t kill you.”

Rin doesn’t bother to argue against you, he’s been over well enough to pick up that you won’t let him become a complete workaholic. 

“Fine,” he gets up and makes his way over to sit on the edge of your bed, because if he doesn't then you’ll eventually force him to sit elsewhere. Something about separating work and personal spaces to improve learning.

You plop down a few inches away with a winning smile, “So, what are your plans?”

“Football practice—”

“Something other than what I already know.”

He exhales loudly. “Catching up on coursework at the cafe, probably.”

This takes you by surprise, only because you work this upcoming weekend. “Really? Well, guess we’ll see each other then.” Maybe tenacity is just rooted deeply in the family’s genes.

“It’s a nice place,” he reasons, sneaking a glance at you.

You begin squirming, trying to turn from Rin without looking like a complete idiot. Then, slowly, “...What do you like about it?”

And, of course, the words barely escape your lips when the whole building seems to creak and groan under the effort of the storm. The power flicks suddenly around the room, and then it’s complete, utter darkness.

You don’t feel Rin’s presence next to you until a sudden gust of air hits your ear. You flinch and clap a hand over your ear while Rin mumbles out a quick apology and stumbles to establish his own personal space on the bed. 

It starts to rain heavier now, water slapping hard against the window panels in big, ugly raindrops. You should probably get up and find a flashlight or any lighting of some sort, something to make the situation less awkward, but your body feels like a rock. You don’t want to move but, at the same time, your mind is telling you to run far, far away from Rin.

Heart throbbing against your chest, you gather up the courage to look at Rin’s face with the help of the dim lighting from the window sill. His eyes are half-lidded, seemingly glazed over in deep thought. He doesn’t say a single word, and every moment of his silence stirs the growing anxiousness inside. You swallow, suddenly aware that he’s beginning to unravel your sanity just by being there besides you. 

“Are you, um, are you okay with thunderstorms?” you adjust your position with shaky limbs, trying your best to not cross his physical boundaries.

Rin fidgets in response, but you can tell he’s also trying to keep his cool. “I’m fine with them. I just wasn’t expecting the power to suddenly…”

“Yeah, my apartment sucks,” you groan, inwardly. “This doesn’t happen all the time, I swear.” A flash of lightning illuminates the room, you squint against the light. “Maintenance won’t be on site ‘till tomorrow morning. I doubt you want to stay so we’ll have to cut the session short for today.”

You feel the mattress dip a little. The two of you fall silent, and there’s a weird awkward tension hanging in the room, one where it leaves you both red and flushing. Your mind is racing, and there’s a million questions. He hasn’t made any moves of getting up, nor has he said anything about leaving. It’s a bit uncharacteristic for Rin to be unsure in a given situation like this, or is he just being polite? This feels different from your first meeting, it’s still unpredictable, still a confusing mess.

“Or we could talk!” you quickly add on. “I…uh, if you want to talk, that is.”

After a few more moments of that awkward, creeping silence permeating the room, Rin sighs. “I don’t know what I’m supposed to talk about,” he whispers and looks up, his face looking worn out.

“You don’t have to say anything if you don’t want to. Silence is also okay.”

“I like silence,” he confesses.

“We can just sit here then,” you agree, “silence in itself can be therapeutic, too.”

You don’t necessarily agree with yourself. If it’s not for work at the cafe, you spend a good deal of your time in silence. Studying, grading students’ papers, thinking about your family back home, and preparing for life after graduation. It all gets overwhelming when you sit and process everything in your mind. Even so, the silence that falls between you and your best friend’s brother feels comfortable, in spite of the initial close proximity. You find yourself leaning back into the bed frame’s headboard, curling up sideways.

About ten minutes in, Rin cracks.

“When I was a kid, I used to be afraid of storms. Sae used to make dumb blanket forts with me. It’s silly, but…”

And, despite it being dark, you shoot him a knowing look. For a moment, Rin looks like he regrets even opening his mouth, like he’s about to blurt out a quick ‘nevermind’, but you don’t give him a chance.

“I’m listening, you don’t have to stop.” Unknowingly, you give his shoulders a little nudge of encouragement. “Do you want to talk about it?”

Rin thinks it over, and he only has to for a moment. “Yeah, I guess I do.”

He talks for a while, until he runs out of things to say. Or, rather, he runs out of energy to say anything. His thought process is a jumbled mess of how his relationship with Sae developed. Being the younger sibling, it’s natural for Rin to look up to his brother, to want to gain acknowledgement and become some sort of a mirror image. The thought of Sae looking after Rin while both of their parents were working overtime to provide for their education is also something you could heavily relate to. Around some point down the line, Sae began to distance himself from Rin without any apparent reasoning, at least in his eyes. Towards the end, it becomes a rambling about nothing, too, and you’re positive that Rin hasn’t even gotten into the meat of the issue.

Rin appears mildly exhausted, flustered, and a little embarrassed by the time he’s done. He turns to you, eyes narrowed, “Don’t say that you feel sorry for me, I’ve heard it about a dozen times already. It gets old.”

You shake your head, processing everything. You can tell he has so much more he wants to get off of his chest, so many things he wants to unload, things that he hasn’t even realized that’s been weighing him down. 

“I wasn’t gonna say that,” and he stays still, studying your next words with high concentration. “Sae and I have been close for quite a while, and I totally get how he’s an ass—to you and just about everyone else. He’s abrasive and straight to the point with a lot of things. Also pretty sure he’s allergic to communication. Hell, I’m not entirely sure how I was able to get close to him in the first place,” you flare a deep breath out of your nose and rhythmically tap your fingers along your thighs. “But I know he has a weird way of caring for others, too.”

“How so?” Rin doesn’t sound annoyed, just confused. Almost hopeful, even. 

“Well, he’s signed you up for tutoring, which might actually not be a good example of care but, um… He normally hates asking people for favors. This is just an unconventional way of saying that he’s making sure you’re doing okay.”

“Could’ve said it himself.”

“Yeah, well, you came to the cafe because he told you, right?”

With that, he quickly shuts his mouth, forming it into a subtle pout. Is he embarrassed that you’re right?

Another flash of lightning comes by, followed by low rumbling thunder. Then, an idea brews.

“This is gonna sound a bit crazy but… do you wanna build a fort?”

Rin snorts. “What’s with that?”

“Well, it doesn't seem like you’re in a rush to leave. Then again, maybe a taxi service would be expensive right now…”

He offers up little resistance to your suggestion and ends up dragging a couple of chairs into your living room from the kitchen. You dig around in your closet and pull out a heavy winter blanket, the ones with a giant tiger imprinted on the front. It’s been stored away for quite some time, leaving bits of dust and other mysterious remnants in the air as you straighten the fabric out. Hopefully Rin’s not sensitive to dust mites. 

One side of the blanket is stretched around the edge of the couch and tucked beneath the cushions. Another corner is wrapped and fastened clumsily around a chair. It hangs over the edge of the coffee table and is held in place by the second chair in the corresponding corner. The overall impression is ridiculous, but there's a decent space on the floor in front of the sofa. 

“That’s a bit better,” you decide, with a faint laugh. 

You’re pressed close to one another, and you have to admit that it’s intimate in a way that you didn’t expect. The air is a little warm, heavy with their breath and the faint heat from the candles. It’s… nice. Outside, the wind is howling, but it is fainter, partially obscured by the blanket barrier that keeps the outside world away.

You decide to stream a horror movie to pass the time, until the weather subsides a bit. You’ll probably go over your data plan for the month, but right now, you don’t really care. You prop the phone up against one of Rin’s textbooks that he didn’t get the chance to go over today, and end up watching a really shitty slasher movie from the 80’s.

At some point, you doze off, leaning in and head tipping to tentatively rest on his shoulder. It’s not the most comfortable position. You’re both slouched back against the couch, pillow wedged under your backs. Your phone eventually runs dead, and the candles burn into nothing—smoldering and smoking as they sputter out.

“Hey,” Rin faintly calls out your name. “It’s getting late.”

You stir in your sleep, finding the strength to open your eyes and tilt your head up. You’re sure that your heart is going to stop beating when he takes notice. The look on your face must’ve been a good one, because now Rin’s six shades of red deeper and he’s got his hand over his mouth. 

“Oh god, I’m sorry, Itoshi!”

“It’s… okay,” his voice is low, sounding almost uncertain. “Rin is also fine.”

You fail to notice his fingers making their way past your forearm, past your neck, until you feel them settle on your warm cheek. Shivers course through your body, and the resulting sounds you release is halfway between a sigh and a whimper. His eyes are half-lidded, glazed, and you’re positive yours are no different.

“Sorry, Rin…” you’re apologizing again, his name sounds foreign on your tongue but feels like home all at the same time. Your voice begins to trail off. You can’t finish, your eyes are already closed, head tilted. As you breathe, with your heart rattling in your throat, you feel Rin lean in close.

As soon as you collide into him, his lips meld against yours.

It’s funny how life works. Some days seem to drag, impossibly slow, especially when you’re trapped in your own mind — replaying everything, obsessing over every single action you’ve done wrong in your life. There are days where you barely get out of bed until it’s time for classes or to get ready for work, where you just go through the motions. 

Other days, they fly by in the blink of an eye. Sometimes it’s because you hole yourself up at the library, nose glued to your textbooks, and body running on adrenaline. Other times, it’s because you keep replaying that kiss you gave Rin, wondering what it means, or if it just means nothing at all. You remember being roped in by the shy, tentative edge in his voice that reminded you when you first met him at the shop, where you first had been infatuated.

Rin hasn’t spoken to you since that night at your apartment. On one hand, while you’re worried that you might’ve said something out of line, and maybe that kiss came off too strong. Which, of course it fucking came off too strong. You kissed your best friend’s brother, and that just spells disaster on its own. Although, on the other hand, you’re glad that you guys are on a first name basis.

That’s fine. Rin seems to be going through a lot and the best professional way to handle this situation is to be… professional. Everything is all too much, and you've decided that you need to take a break.

That night, you’ve made a quick trip home after work to stay at your family’s. You don’t have time to mull over a certain junior of yours, not when you have your own things to take care of. 

Your parents’ are currently on their anniversary date, leaving behind your two younger siblings all by themselves. You think two eight year olds could handle themselves just fine for a few hours but, then again, kids these days are just built differently.

You ended up ordering takeout and made them sit through a painstakingly long foreign film. Subtitles always put kids to sleep faster, you’ve learned. After carrying them to bed, you decide to spend the rest of your night sitting outside on the patio and wait for the return of your parents.

The skies are always clearer in the suburbs compared to the bustling city lights that pollute everywhere else. You sit down on a small plastic chair, one belonging to your siblings, and spend a good few minutes appreciating the twinkling stars and the raw smell of the countryside. You fix your gaze out in the distance, at the same hills and mountains the sprawling city overlooks.

Feeling inspired, you fish out your phone and decide to send Sae a quick picture of the surroundings with the caption ‘miss you loser :P’. It’s a small mini-game that you two started a year back, sending each other photos whenever away from campus, even though it’s mainly you sending the photos and he sends back middle finger emojis. 

Though, as soon as you hit the send button, dread immediately fills your gut. 

“Wait, shit, shit—wrong brother!” 

Your heart hammers against your chest as you stare at the now seemingly flirty caption and, dear lord, your reputation might as well be down the gutters. This will go down as probably the most embarrassing moments of your life, and what makes things even worse is that you know Rin has seen it because three gray dots are now jumping up and down in the chat log.

God, what are you even supposed to say to that?

[Sae’s Brother!!!]: I’m sorry?

When you receive the responding text, you feel yourself losing ten years off your lifespan. You bury your face into your hands and whine, loudly. 

This incident on top of whatever the hell happened during the night of the storm… Rin probably thinks you’re a creep for doing this. You can already imagine how it’ll play out: Rin tells Sae that you’re harassing him, Sae stops being your friend, and you’ll probably have to drop out and move out of the country. Rin might never even show himself to you again, and that thought alone makes your throat tighten up.

However, before you can descend into further madness, if that’s even possible, your phone vibrates again. You swallow the needles in your throat and peek through the cracks between your fingers.

[Sae’s Brother!!!]: Looks nice. 

And, to your surprise, there’s an image attached to the text. It’s a dim photo of his opened textbook, a filled in study guide sheet beside his laptop, and on the right side of his desk is a drink from the cafe. You want to make a dumb oolong tea joke, but now you feel bad for disrupting his study session. 

Then, another notification comes through.

[Sae’s Brother!!!]: Miss you too. :P

Your heart promptly multiplies into a thousand pieces. You lean into the chair, almost tipping yourself over. Your heart’s beating so hard that you can practically feel it pulse against your temples. Taking deep breaths, you don’t look at your phone until the urge to run away fades. 

It feels like you're dreaming, and you know it’s absolutely stupid and silly, that you feel like you’re floating right into a dumb romance drama right now, but you can’t help it. Not when Rin is pulling stunts like this. He probably meant it as a joke, maybe only responded back to mirror you, who knows. But someone like him should not have the power to be so, so adorable under all that hard exterior. That’s just illegal…

“God,” your breath shudders out and you thumb over the keyboard to respond back.

[You]: didn’t mean to send that to you haha… ;; [You]: but i take it that studying is going well??

Rin replies back within seconds.

[Sae’s Brother!!!]: I know. [Sae’s Brother!!!]: Studying’s been fine. Might need to look over something when we meet up again, if that’s okay. [You]: of course!! just lemme know what day works :)

Rin sends you a thumbs up emoji and you don’t get a response for a while after that, figuring that he probably went back to work. It doesn’t matter anyway, because it feels like a hundred pounds just got lifted from your shoulders and you feel so light that you’re convinced that you can see the stars even clearer now. 

Thank the heavens he didn’t make it weirder than it already was.

Fuzzy-brained, you decide that it might be best to call it a night and retreat back into the house and towards your old bedroom. Even while laying down on your plush mattress, curled up, with the aircon on blast, you couldn’t fall asleep — at least, not for a long while.

By the time you pass out, it’s from sheer exhaustion and adrenaline rush. Your phone remains gripped against your chest as you sleep, and you end up missing another message from Rin late in the night.

[Sae’s Brother!!!]: Your manager doesn’t make good oolong. Come back soon.

There are several moments when you tell yourself you need to take a couple steps back. That you really, really need to calm down about Itoshi Rin.

The rest of the week comes and goes. You haven’t seen Rin in a few days. You guys sorta text, with him giving you curt updates on his assignments, but Rin goes long periods of time without replying. And, when he does reply, even though it’s just a text on screen, you get a distinct idea that he’s probably tired. So most of the time you end up lounging around at Sae’s apartment, busying yourself with your own assignments and bothering Sae about the end of the year assessment. And maybe you mope to him about his younger brother. Just a little bit.

“Does Rin hate me?” 

“Why do you ask?” You could practically hear the eye roll in his response.

You feel a bit juvenile when you explain the reasoning, it’s obvious in your tone. “He’s, um, been kinda dry.”

“Is water dry?”

“...No?”

“Then there’s your answer,” Sae yawns and flips to the next page in whatever new psychological thriller novel he picked up. “Should feel lucky that he’s even responding back, I barely get an emoji out of him.”

Part of the fun thing about being friends with Sae is having full 24 hour access to his apartment. Whenever you’re running low on food, it doesn’t matter if it’s milk or potatoes, somehow there’s always extras at his place. The least fun thing about being friends with him is that he’s god awful at keeping up with conversations. Or, at least in this case, giving you advice on how to approach Rin appropriately.

You decide to change up the topic, slightly. Your mind’s currently running on three shots of espresso and one shitty breakfast sandwich from the dining hall, not really the best combo, and the words start flooding out. “On a different note, if someone you kinda just met shows a side of them that they’ve probably never shown to anyone, how would you react?”

Sae straightens from the couch, eyes flickering to you then back to the book. “Depends on who it is,” he shrugs. He doesn’t sound too interested in the conversation.

“Wise words, I see…” you hum in deep thought. You begin strutting around the tiny living room, circling around in front of the TV and keeping a somewhat watchful eye on Sae as you choose your next words carefully. “What if… it’s like a big thing? Super pent up for so long that they just start pouring all their emotions onto you? How would you react to that?”

“Sounds like a weird person. I would probably leave,” Sae’s voice is dismissive.

You groan, fully understanding Rin’s personal dilemma. “At least pretend to be serious right now!”

And, with that, he shuts his book and rests his cheek against his palm, sighing. “Maybe they told you because they’re afraid of talking to their close friends. Or maybe they just feel comfortable around you, I don’t know. Since you’re so caught up about this… who are you talking about?”

Shit, he caught on. 

Sae hardens his gaze on you, suspicion sprawled across his sharp features.

“I—um, uh, it’s a classmate of mine! We were going over grad school applications and they seemed really lost about if they wanted to apply or not… I was just a little surprised when they started talking about their insecurities with me, that’s all. We’re a little bit closer now, though…” your voice trails off and Sae cocks his head a little, pursing his lips, but decides to leave the topic be.

“Right, well… how are Rin’s studies coming along?” Sae asks after a long pause and backs out of your space. 

It’s not like Rin’s doing terribly at his studies. He’s picking up some of the methods and variables faster than most people in your department, perhaps even learning at a faster pace than yourself. Though, and this is just an observation, you’ve noticed that Rin rarely takes notes in his classes. When he does, well, it’s sloppy and unfocused. You’re starting to worry, since his midterm is rounding the corner, and you’ve been itching to ask if he remembers the material or if he doesn’t care. You want to, really, but it’s technically not your job to look after him full-time.

Unless it totally has something to do with the weird family dynamic that you can never really nail down? Yeah, you’re definitely not sticking your nose into that mud anytime soon. The last time you did that, well… 

“He’s doing fine!” You offer up that much. It’s a little taste of honesty. Not the full truth. Somehow, you know that Sae is damn well aware of that, too.

“As long as he’s motivated, that’s all that really matters.” Sae mumbles. He drops the conversation and it’s probably a good thing, because you can’t concentrate at all.

By the end of this particular meeting, you feel like you’re going to vomit. Your stomach has jumped into your throat, and you’re struggling to keep your breakfast down. It’s way too late to call out of work, so you power through and manage to make it in time for your shift. It’s not until you arrive that you notice a familiar tuff of black hair behind the register, eyes glimmering with all flirt and talk with a female student across the counter. 

Then, it hits you, if there’s one person other than Sae who can give mildly okay advice, it’s him.

When the evening rush dies down, you relay the situation back to Oliver, throwing on the crucial details—well, minus the kiss—unfortunately you can’t risk that information going out of his mouth. Unlike Sae, he shows interest from the get go, providing you live reactions and commentary as the story continues. When asked for his thoughts, Oliver covered his face and howled in laughter for a long while, getting stares from customers, before leaning in and eyes you very seriously.

“Kid’s got a massive crush on you, that’s for sure.”

Oliver is obviously a better listener compared to Sae, but also has a tendency to stretch things out for dramatic purposes. You should’ve mentally prepared yourself for this.

“Wait a sec,” Oliver sits on the countertop, despite the rules encouraging against it written on the chalkboard behind him, ponders hard for a moment, and then, “You like him!”

You almost spill a shot of espresso all over your fingers, letting out a small screech, and look up, doing a bit of a double take at your friend. “Don’t you have better jokes to make?!”

Oliver tosses you a clean towel from underneath the counter space and offers an apologetic smile, but he looks amused. “You wanted my honest opinion. Hot, young stud falls for his tutor who also works as a barista? The prompt just writes for itself.”

You swallow a gagging noise. “Please don’t ever refer to Rin as a hot, young stud… even if it is true.”

“If we want to peel back several more layers, maybe this is all part of Sae’s elaborate plan to hook you up with someone.”

“Can’t you have another family emergency again?” You like Oliver. He’s possibly your only favorite coworker out of all the other part-timers, but you’re very unimpressed with him right now. “I’m still in college. You’re acting like I’m going to be forever alone, or something.”

“While that might be true,” Oliver agrees, mildly. “I still think the kid might just be bad with… y’know, showing emotions.” He motions his hands in a heart shape near his chest. “I was like that when I was his age, too.”

“Gross, now you’re just making yourself sound like an old man.” With that beard, it sure adds a few years to his face. No wonder he’s so popular with the ladies.

“You should be more honest with yourself,” he softly chastises, offering you a blueberry muffin that he definitely stole from the back. “Life would feel a lot easier.”

“You talk as if I’m a fictional character in some stupid story,” you sigh, gracefully accepting the baked good in defeat.

There’s a part of you that feels bitter after the conversation, afraid that he’s right. You’ve been solely focusing on your academics for the most part, and that’s not to say that you haven’t had others showing interest in you. 

You remembered Oliver hounding you down on your very first day at the coffee shop, trying to get your attention by making you clean up his spills, not sure why he thought that was a good idea… Another guy from your department also tried hitting asking you out by creating a fake math problem that would eventually lead to him asking for your number, but the variables were messed up and all over the place that it didn’t make any sense. 

You don’t put relationships on a high pedestal, and you don’t necessarily need to be in one right now. Maintaining a steady income and keeping your scholarship should be your top priority. That, and not falling for your best friend’s brother.

Things go uneventfully for a little while longer at the shop. You and Oliver were going to put on the latest episode of the Bachelor to pass the remaining shift but, by the time you were just about to finish setting up the monitor, the front door bell chimes.

You blink. You and Oliver are in the corner tucked at the back of the store. It’s ten minutes until closing and your stomach churns wildly at the thought of another inconsiderate customer. Because if it happens to be another frat guy ordering a “secret menu” item that some person made up on TikTok again… well, you’re gonna start crying.

“I’ll go take care of it,” you sigh, fishing out the store’s keys out of your pocket. “Just tell me who the guy ends up with.”

Oliver grins as he presses the play button. “Roger that, boss.”

You hadn’t really expected to see Itoshi Rin of all people to swing by.

He barely gets any words out when you emerge to the front counter, needless to say you were the same. After a few mindless scrabbling around and awkward shifting, Rin spits out that he needs an emergency tutoring session, back at his apartment of all places. And, at some point in the night, between your mind turning into mush and Rin refusing to look you in the eyes, Oliver sends you off a little early before you have the chance to help him close.

Which ultimately leads you off here.

“So, what’s the burning question you have for me?” you ask, setting down your book bag on the floor. 

Rin’s apartment is a lot minimalistic compared to yours, and more on the traditional side. His place is a bit further out of the downtown area, into the quieter parts of Tokyo, but not terribly far from the school’s public transit. Here, the buildings aren’t skyscrapers and the traffic is manageable, which means a lot more parks and greenery. 

Instead of a dining table with chairs, he opted for a low coffee table and cushions instead. There’s tatami flooring, a small bookshelf in the corner with organized sports magazines, textbooks, and a few horror films. Hanging on the walls are a variety of posters; most of them are famous foreign football players and some are a few popular movie covers. 

The coffee table is placed right near his bedside, so it makes a perfect back rest for you. Rin keeps a small desk lamp on, he’s mentioned to you in passing that small amounts of warm lighting helps him focus. This setup is certainly a lot more comfortable compared to yours.

Rin decides to sit next to you this time, pulling out an array of notebooks from his bag and fidgets with his pens on the table before flipping to his last pages of notes. “It’s about… torque and resistance.” He buries half of his face into his palm as his fingers trace, almost obsessively, through the notes. From one glance, his writing looks coherent enough, better from when he first started out.

“Um, yeah, sure,” you keep a close eye on him. Rin is behaving rather strangely. Restless, agitated, annoyed, or a combination of all three. Though, a minute into the small lecture, Rin softly calls out your name. “Y-Yes?” you can begin to feel your neck growing dangerously hot.

“About that night, last week…” he finally pushes the words out, but lets them hang in the air, inconclusive.

Your cheeks flare up, and you turn away, clearly embarrassed. Suddenly, you feel like a complete idiot all over again. “I—I’m sorry about that,” you stammer out, staring down at your fingers. “I don’t know what came over me, everything was so dark and—”

“You don’t need to apologize,” he consoles, quickly. “I’m glad that it happened. It was… I… it was good.”

It’s a bit of a rambling response, but it leaves you stunned and flustered, without even realizing it.  You finally turn to look at him, eyes a little misty, your cheeks still warm. You’re relieved by Rin’s reply. You open your mouth to respond back, but nothing tangible comes out.

“I want it to happen again,” Rin finds himself saying, tone suddenly low and dark. He shoots you a look, one that you can’t quite interpret. It’s like he’s hovering somewhere between concern and fear that he’s pushing too far. And maybe he is, but you are too.

You let your legs slip out from underneath and you lean up against Rin’s bed. If it wasn’t there, you’d collapse for sure.

Rin follows suit but pulls away from you abruptly, and you manage to look up just in time to catch the flush in his cheeks and neck. It’s hard to see it in the dark but, if Rin’s body language is anything to go by, he’s incredibly embarrassed. 

“Are you okay?” His voice is quiet, and you manage a shaky nod, but that nod is immediately followed by another involuntary sound from the back of your throat.

“I, um, should we tell…?” 

You’re not entirely sure where Rin stands with his relationship with Sae, nor if both of you can predict the outcome of what would happen. Sae is still a close friend, but you can’t hide the fact that you like Rin away from him forever. Plus, would this even realistically work out? Graduate school, job interviews, things of that sort aren’t in Rin’s horizons, but…

“We don’t have to do anything right now,” he seems to catch on and clears his throat, looking away. “I just wanted to make my feelings clear.”

You briefly think back to Oliver’s advice earlier in the night, about being more honest with your feelings. How things will magically become easier. It’ll be unfair if you didn’t pour out your heart like Rin had done just now. But words can’t be the only way of showing your honesty.

“We can take it slowly,” you stumble out.

Screw it, maybe you can ask Sae for a favor after you’re done tutoring.

Those words seem to melt Rin’s hard exterior almost instantly. Wrapping both your arms around his neck, you press a chaste kiss to his inviting lips.

Rin doesn’t say anything else, but there’s another little teasing nudge of his shoulder bumping against yours, and it somehow communicates more than it should.

taglist: @hellothere9597 @itzmeme @scaraslover @kidd3ath @torureadz

a/n: hi again everyone... if you've made it this far - thank you ;; this piece might just be the longest fic i've ever written (to date...) and tbh im not sure if i like it ? maybe i do idk!! there were so many times i wanted to throw my laptop against the wall gaah did you know that i originally wanted sae to come in and interrupt towards the end? thank god i didnt otherwise our two main love birds wouldn't have been able to kiss... anyways, ty for reading and hopefully you'll see me around more <3 <3 ty i love you

[fangirl-dot-com]

Is That Subway Surfers? - 1k Special

GUYS WE ARE OVER 1K FOLLOWERS! I NEVER EXPECTED THIS TO HAPPEN OH MY WORD

It's only been, what, two months since I started "To Do is to Dare"? That's crazy!!

So for celebration, here is a little backstory on how Arthur and Reader met and a little look into her early Dams days with him and Ollie!

TAG LIST IS CLOSED!

Thanks for all the love!!

December 2022

You hung your head as Vito went over the details one more time. 

“Ok, kid. Dams wants to sign you for your last year. And you’ll be partnering with Arthur Leclerc. You know him?” You manager questioned as he held his iPad. 

You only rolled your eyes. “I know of him. Isn’t his brother the Ferrari driver? Uh, Charles?” 

Vito nodded at your limited knowledge. “Bingo. Dams thinks that the two of you have similar driving styles and that he’ll push you to win the championship.” 

You looked down at your iPad that was in your hands. Arthur’s smiley face stared back at you. A list of his credentials were to the left of the picture. You looked back up at your manager. You were thankful for another chance, but you were skeptical. 

“Prema didn’t want to keep me for one more year?” You let out a scoff at the end for a good measure. The team that helped you through Formula 3 and your first two years of Formula 2 suddenly dropped you after a few mistakes: mistakes that honestly shouldn’t have happened. 

Vito’s hand dropped on your shoulder and he crouched down to eyelevel. He gave you a sympathetic smile. He knew you were nervous of the unknown and he wished Lorenzo could have been here for you. But, he was trying his best. 

“Kid.” You locked eyes with him, tears in your lash line. “I know it’s scary, but give the team a chance. This could be it.” 

It meaning your last chance to win the championship and maybe get a foot in the door for a future Formula 1 seat. Your next best bet would be to get a test driver seat for McLaren or even Red Bull. But your chances were slim as most of the top teams already had who they wanted with several year contracts in place. 

You put the iPad down and took multiple breaths. If you were to give the ok, you’d be meeting your future teammate very quickly. 

A trying smile formed on your face. “I think I’ll miss Ollie though. He was a cool kid.”

Vito granted you with another eyeroll. “You speak as if you’re like 5 years older than him.”

Realistically speaking, you were almost two years older than the British driver. But, his “childish” antics made you feel as though you really had to watch out for him. 

Vito continued, “And that kid loves you to death. You just need to get over your thoughts of you being unlovable.” 

Your head swayed back and forth and nodded. “Yeah, yeah, yeah. Let’s go meet this, uh, French dude?”

“He’s Monégasque.”

You clicked your tongue. “Ah.” 

Vito packed up his bag and the iPads and led you out of your small Nice apartment. The drive to the headquarters wasn’t a long one. You just spent the majority of it watching small raindrops fall down your window, hoping that the smaller one would win the imaginary race that was going on in your head. 

“Kid, we her-…” 

“DANG IT YOU SHOULD HAVE WON!” Your fist hit the door. You suddenly froze and turned to look at Vito, who was already staring at you. The two of you then suddenly burst into laughter. It took you two a while to calm down, but you eventually made your way into the large building. 

The hallways were a bit confusing, but you and Vito finally made it to the conference room. Sadly though, the two of you were the last ones there. A blond boy was sitting in one of the plush chairs, looking intently at his phone. 

You guessed he didn’t hear you come in, as you were able to take a seat right next to him. Your eyes barely glanced over, before you saw him playing your favorite mobile game. 

“Is that Subway Surfers?” you whispered as you watched Vito introduce himself to the other adults in the room. 

Arthur practically jumped out of his chair at the new voice right in his ear. His wide green eyes were met with you, trying not to laugh too hard. 

He stuttered out in broken French, “Je – je suis vraiment desole. Je ne savais pas que tu etais la et j’aurais du faire attention, et oh mon dieu, tu es vraiment jolie et maintenant je divague...” 

(I – I am so sorry. I didn’t know you were there and I should have been paying attention, and oh my gosh you’re really pretty and now I’m rambling…)

You only stared as he was falling over his words. You put a hand on his leg and he shut up quickly. 

“First off, I legit didn’t understand a word you said. And second, whatever it is, it’s fine! I shouldn’t have snuck up on you like that.” You flashed a bright smile at him.

Arthur tried once again, in English with a heavy accent, “I, uh, am sorry. I should have been paying attention. I’m Arthur.” 

He held out his hand for you to take. Your hand grasped his and you shook it. 

“Hi Arthur, I’m Y/n. It’s nice to meet my teammate for this season.” 

He flashed you an even larger smile. In your mind, you thought he was adorable. He let out a small laugh as he turned off his phone. 

“It was Subway Surfers. I love the game.” 

“So do I! It’s so much fun.” 

“Are you two done flirting already or can we begin to talk contracts?” Vito’s voice pulled the two of you from your little bubble. With sheepish smiles from both of you, you turned your attention to the CEO. 

The meeting was a few hours long, and by the end of it, you were starving. As you were leaving, Arthur grasped your hand, which made you stop. Vito just calmly said that he’d be waiting in the car. 

“Yes?” You cocked your head as you looked up at the taller boy. 

He had a shy smile as he looked down at you. “Would you like to join me and my friend for dinner? We’re just going to a local restaurant and it’s not too far.” 

As your brain was trying to come up with an excuse, Vito yelled from where he was standing by the vehicle. “She would love to! Just have her give you her address. Have fun kid!” 

And with that, he got into the car and drove away. All while you were standing next to Arthur with your mouth open. You quickly closed it to not look like a loser. 

“Uh, I guess I’ll come with?” It came out more like a question, but Arthur just went with it. He led you to his car and you were surprised it wasn’t a decked out Ferrari. 

You only smirked. “Not a Ferrari guy?” 

Arthur rolled his eyes as he got in the driver side. “That would unfortunately be my brother. I might be part of the academy, but we don’t get any fancy treatment.”

You snorted at that. “Yeah, I’ve never actually been a test driver for any team. I have my own management and everything.” 

Arthur raised his eyebrows but didn’t ask anything else. 

The ride to the restaurant was fairly quiet and not awkward. Around halfway through, he had finally turned on the radio. 

And although Arthur didn’t drive a fancy car, he was not above valet parking. 

“Hold on,” he told you as he quickly got out and skirted around the front to open your door. You looked up at him with a shy smile. 

“What a gentleman.” He hand firmly but gently grasped yours as he led you through the doorway. 

“My maman would have my head. Ah, there’s my friend.” Arthur pointed to a table near the back. 

But to your surprise, you definitely recognized the brunet that looked bored to death.

“Ollie!” you called out. 

The Brit’s head whipped up at the sound of your voice. A giant smile formed on his face as he stood up. You quickly brought him into a hug. 

“I didn’t know you knew Arthur?” He questioned as the three of you sat down. Arthur called the waiter over so that you could get a drink. 

You looked over at the green-eyed driver. “Hmmm, just met today actually.” 

Arthur sipped his water. “We’re teammates for this year.” 

Ollie looked back and forth, ideas forming in his mind. But, he wouldn’t be telling the ideas to you any time soon. 

“What is that smirk for,” you questioned. 

“You totally scared him when you met him. Didn’t you?” 

“You scared him too?” 

Oh, boy were you screwed for the next years. 

(What you didn’t know was that these boys would become two of you very best friends. And maybe one of them would become something more.)  

y/n.89 has posted

y/n.89 am I interrupting something? tagged: olliebearman and arthur_leclerc

liked by y/n_nation, y/n-fan, y/n_is_on_top, and 10,839 others

olliebearman no comment?

prema_y/n ahaha prema racers back together

y/n_fan well, until prema dropped her... y/nxarthur well, now we get ollie AND arthur content so I'm not complaining

arthur_leclerc btw I wiped it right off

olliebearman YOU TAKE THAT BACK y/n.89 girls, girls, girls, let's not fight

prema_trio your honor, I love them

best_rookie_y/n anyone else here from 2024 and is here to see how little y/n was

olliebearman has posted

olliebearman who's the third-wheel now hmmmm? tagged: y/n.89 and arthur_leclerc

liked by premaracing, olliebear2, y/n_lover29, and 15,983 others

y/n.89 still you?

y/n&friends they are so hot

ollie_is_my_guy I could take them (but not in a fight)

olliebearman he is not THAT funny

arthur_leclerc yes I am y/n.89 ollie is a certified Arthur haterrrrr olliebearman then you'd be a certified Arthur loverrrrrr y/n.89 shut UP

y/n_nation our girl and her boys :D

arthur_leclerc has posted

arthur_leclerc why are we always at restaurants? tagged: y/n.89 and olliebearman

liked by y/n.89, olliebearman, charles_leclerc, and 58,284 others

y/n.89 because we like food (and none of us can actually cook)

charles_leclerc felt arthur_leclerc go away

thur_thur_92 I wonder who won

olliebearman me arthur_leclerc me y/n.89 wrong, it was me

best_trio_2023 they all give chaotic gen z energy and I am here for it!

y/n_loves_ME its the fact that Arthur is technically the oldest cause he's 22 right now while y/n is 19 and Ollie just turned 18

y/n.89 yet he still acts like a child

rb_y/n we need this trio to get back together in 2024 ASAP

y/n.89 has posted

y/n.89 they watch kung-fu panda ONCE tagged: olliebearman and arthur_leclerc

liked by y/n_nation, f2_fanatic, prema_trio22, and 19,274 others

y/n_updates BAHAHAHAHA cause this is so true for everyone

arthur_leclerc I am the Dragon Warrior

olliebearman um, no, you're more of a Master Oogway y/n.89 I am definitely the dragon warrior, ollie you can be the goose y/n's-favorite HELLO?

f2-fanatic I'm going to miss this group in a few months since y/n has to leave after the championship, and I don't know if Arthur is confirmed for next year :(

f2-trio SHHHHHH WE DON'T SPEAK OF THAT

y/n.89 I look amazing for once

y/n_nation ONE MORE RACE AND YOU GET THAT CHAMPIONSHIP GIRL!!

y/n.89 with olliebearman and arthur_leclerc has posted

y/n.89 wherever we go, we'll somehow end up back together

liked by damsracing, fredderikvasti, y/n_nation and 11,783 others

y.n_ON-TOP I'm going to miss this

olliebearman this was actually sweet?

arthur_lecerlc yeah, weird. are you feeling ok? y/n.89 no, this is more like I feel threatened? you both follow me everywhere

rookie_y/n I know she's done in f2, but where will she go after?

y/n'sfavperson as of right now, we don't know. basically all doors for f1 are closed y/n_updates well, she was wanting to possibly be a testing driver for McLaren but rumor has it that they just side Bianca Bustemante

vito_official can't say that I'll 100 percent miss the three of you annoying me all the time, but I will miss the three of you

olliebearman I KNEW YOU LIKED US arthur_leclerc LETS GO vito_official I take it back? y/n.89 no

y/n4f1 we just need a miracle right now - for her to somehow get into f1

f1_news GUYS DID YOU JUST SEE??? CHECO JUST ANNOUNCED HIS RETIREMENT

TAG LIST: @fionaschicken @glitterquadricorn @laura-naruto-fan1998 @treehouse-mouse @sam-is-lost @kagatinkita @fangirl125reader @megatrilss1885 @myxticmoon @angsthology @cmleitora @agent-curt-mega @graciewrote @ashy-kit @slutofmultifandom @aexitizen @sugarvibez @vellicora @thatgirlthatreadswattpad @cashtons-wife @aeh2 @hoetel-manager @xcharlottemikaelsonx @jayda12 @cassie0sstuff @ilove-tswizzle @justme2042 @itsjustkhaos @nikfigueiredo @stopeatread @cha-hot @sadg3 @iloveyou3000morgan @s4turnsl0ver @alessioayla @torchbearerkyle @leptitlu @awekbachira @shreks-sugar-daddy @v1naco @stan-josie @mellowarcadefun @badassturtle13 @beskardroids @callisposts @poppyalice2001 @juniper-july19

[hxney-lemcn]

Best Friend — Idia Shroud x gn! reader

summery: Idia realizes that you might be closer than he thought.

tw: uhhh none I think.

a/n: idk if this is bad, I think I got Idia's personality right. This is kinda more platonic, but could be read as romantic.

wc: 0.6k

Master List

The more Idia got to know you, the more he realized you might’ve been less of a normie than he originally thought. Of course you were nowhere near Idia’s status of loser otaku, but you still surprised him. It started with you complaining about something called vocaloid? Idia hadn’t heard of vocaloid before, but when you explained the concept he realized it was your world's version of synthaloid. That was the first time he started to question his view of you. As you complained about not being able to listen to vocaloid anymore, he introduced you to some synthaloid songs. He watched as your eyes lit up, head bobbing to the songs as you scanned the lyrics. 

He hadn’t heard of normies liking synthaloid, but you were still too extroverted. I mean you had how many friends in how many dorms? Total normie activities. Yet you shocked him once again when you then started complaining about missing this one video game you used to play. Apparently it was really chill but competitive. When you mentioned it was called AFK Journey Idia froze, he played a game with an uncannily similar name. So he introduced you to AFK Adventure, and found his heart jumping as you gushed passionately, comparing all the similarities and differences. AFK Adventure was still growing, and the fact that you played your version only months after it was released…he once again questioned if you really were a normie. 

The final nail in the coffin was when you complained about how exhausted you were. The main reason why he classified you as normie was because you were social, you had friends, you barely had a phone! (That wasn’t your fault, you had no money after all). So when you complained that you were tired from all the socializing, that you found refuge in his room because you felt like you could truly relax by just playing video games…well he was a bit flustered to say the least. You found him comforting? You found his messy, gross room relaxing (Ortho tried his best to clean it before you arrived)? You enjoyed playing video games with him even if he would tend to blow up if someone annoyed him? 

Idia found himself sharing more with you. It seemed like everywhere he looked (online) he’d find something about you to connect it with. You’d really like this anime, it seemed similar to one you described from your world. You liked chill games right? Well there's this mobile digital pet game you’d like, you just have to friend him. Oh, fanart of your fav character…he’d send it to you if he had the courage. He had also set you up with a pc, laptop, and upgraded your phone without a second thought. It was only to encourage you to go on games to give him rewards…totally. 

And not to mention, when you first joined AFK Adventure, Idia kicked out a member from his guild to let you join. His other guild members were highly confused he let in a noob join since it was a whale only guild (don’t worry, you weren’t a noob for long…thank Idia’s credit card). 

One night, when you both were playing a video game together, you had fallen asleep on his bed. The laptop he had given you was still running, but it was pushed to your side. Idia couldn’t help but feel his face heat up, you looked so peaceful in his space. That’s when he realized he wasn’t truly alone anymore, even if he stayed holed up in his room, you managed to wiggle your way to join him. You would rant about nerdy things to him only, a special privilege you hadn’t bestowed to any of your other friends. He had come to a conclusion that somewhat scared him.

Idia Shroud had a close friend, he wasn’t alone anymore.

[devsgames]

HOT GAMEDEVS DON'T GATEKEEP

Inspired by this post by @midwinterhunt, here's a compilation of all the game dev resources I have come across, most of which I use fairly frequently. Most of these are free, some are paid but fairly cheap. Feel free to add your own resources. ✌️

Important reminder: When using basically any works or programs someone else created in your games, make sure you thoroughly understand the licenses and terms it has been shared with. If you don't know what the terms are, reach out to the resource and ask. Don't be lazy about this; it's not only dishonest but it can come back to bite you.

Engines

Unity - Best suited for mobile and multi-platform.

Unreal - Tailored for shooters and high-fidelity experiences.

PICO-8 - Virtual console for simple games

Godot - Open source and free!

GameMaker - Good for 2D games

Bitsy - Great little engine for making simple games and experiences

Construct - Never used but have heard nice things

Scratch - If you've never coded before, this is the best place to start. Great for young devs and those who want to get their feet wet.

Adventure Game Studio - Best suited for adventure games

RPG Maker - Best suited for top-down classic JRPG style games

Twine - Text-centric games like Interactive Fiction

Assets

OpenGameArt - Many assets, various licenses, and plenty of CC0 content.

Unity Store - For Unity only. Some free.

Unreal Store - For Unreal only. Some free.

Godot Asset Library

Jean Moreno's Toon Effects - Some of the best effects available on the Unity store. Unity only but I've used them in basically every project.

Steamworks.net C# Wrapper For Unity - Unity only C# wrapper for integrating Steam compatibility to your game

Itch.io - Plenty of free art assets and game dev resources

Kenney - Kenney makes tons of open-source assets for devs to use.

Art

Mixamo - Generates rigs for your humanoid models and lets you apply a library of free humanoid animations to them. Super helpful for prototyping. Adobe.

Blender - Free, open source and fully featured 3D program.

XNormal - Free offline normal map generator

Normal Map Online - Free online normal map generator

Crocotile - Cheap tool for building 3D models from sprite sheets

MagicaVoxel - Free voxel modelling tool

Piskel - Free online sprite drawing tool

Aesprite - Paid sprite drawing tool

TurboSquid - Not always great quality, but can be good source of free placeholders.

Textures.com - Limited texture downloads per day but free for personal use.

Pexels - Free stock photo resource. Most are free for commercial use. Check licenses.

Clipstudio - Good for illustration or graphic design. One time payment.

GIMP - Image editing program a-la Photoshop. Free.

Audio

Audacity - Free and fully-featured DAW/audio editor.

sfx.me - Free 8-bit synth-style sound effect generator for games.

CastingCallClub - Easy forum to find amateur voice talent for your project (p.s.: you should pay them).

FreeSound.org - Free sounds, searchable by license. A go-to for my audio needs.

Incompetech - Royalty-free music by Kevin McLeod.

Scott Buckley Music - Royalty free with conditions. Generally more on the cinematic side of things but very good stuff!

SoundCloud - 'Search -> By Track -> Filter: Use Commercially' leads to songs posted with allowance of commercial use. Always reach out to the artist to understand their terms and confirm that it's okay to use with your project.

Project Planning

Keymailer - Handy for mailing keys to influencers (don't expect a lot of traction unless you're paying for some of the features though).

Trello - Kanban board. Great for organizing tasks, managing bugs, etc. Free.

Notion - Private text and wiki page editor. Good for project organization, note taking, and fleshing out ideas. Free.

Obsidian - Alternative to Notion, with similar features.

Miro - Free whiteboard for organizing thoughts, images, brainstorming, etc.

Wave - Free Bookkeeping site. Great for keeping finances organized.

[dandylovesturtles]

Sidelined AU Info Post

Alright, I guess we're doing this

CWs: mentions of internalized ableism, struggles with mental health

Timeline:

all of S1 is the same as in canon up until End Game

however, after Splinter turns over the helmet to Draxum, Draxum does not put on the armor, but chooses to put Leo inside instead, realizing that whoever goes in will probably have something horrible happen to them. that's detailed in this fic

unlike Draxum, who gets spit out of the armor immediately, Leo ends up trapped inside. from Leo's perspective, he is only vaguely aware of what's happening outside (it's a bit sunken place-ish, with him seeing snatches of events like through a grainy television), and he has only small amounts of influence over what the armor does

once Feral Shredder is on the loose, he pretty immediately starts destroying the Hidden City. Draxum realizes that he has inadvertently released a great evil on his people, the exact opposite of what he wanted, and he turns to the Hamatos to help him stop it. obviously they don't want to work with Draxum, but they have to get Leo back so they take the help

it takes them two days, during which the Shredder moves up to start terrorizing New York as well, but eventually they get him subdued. I'm not 100% on what goes down yet or whether Big Mama gets involved (I'm leaning toward not), but Leo fighting from the inside is a big help

Leo is removed from the armor and is in really bad physical shape; meanwhile the Shredder is subdued for now. in the immediate aftermath, the Foot Clan manages to get ahold of the Shredder and take off with him

he's too weak to do anything immediately but he is very much a Looming Threat the family is aware of

Draxum leaves for awhile at this point because none of them want him around and seeing Leo in the aftermath did wake him up to "oh yeah that's just a kid and I did that to him," also he's feeling real bad about that whole "accidentally almost destroying the yokai and also maybe the world" thing

meanwhile, Leo is severely weakened, but there's not anything that the family can do to hasten his recovery. they can only get him hooked up to an IV for fluids and nutrients and wait

it takes Leo a few days to become fully lucid again; during that time he tries to fight anyone around him off or sometimes pushes his family away to "protect" them

eventually Leo does regain lucidity, he tells everyone he's fine but he's Super Depressed. he's also lost his mystic powers completely.

Splinter also retreats a bit at this point, because he feels guilt for handing the helmet over to Draxum instead of trying to find a different way to rescue his boys, which isn't a great thing for him to do but his mental health is also not doing very well (someone get these guys some therapy)

in the meantime the bros and April manage the best they can, they all have different approaches but I'll go into detail about that in the next section

there's no treatment for Leo's condition outside the most boring one: time, exercise, and diet. unsurprisingly he hates this

Healing Bad Times abound, as shown in this fic

eventually the boys have to go out on a mission again. Leo, feeling useless, listens in on the comms from the lair, and ends up catching something the other boys' missed, meaning he's able to save them from a trap or something idk exactly what the point is he makes himself useful

this opens up a new path for Leo, one his brothers very heavily encourage

with a new goal in mind, Leo starts taking a lot better care of himself, actually following his physical therapy routine, spending time gaining new skills, and accepting help in the form of mobility aids. his physical and mental health both start making big improvements

this also helps his dad's mental health, everyone is doing better even if things aren't perfect

Donnie builds Leo a command center modeled after the bridge of Jupiter Jim's ship, he absolutely loves it. whenever the boys+April are on missions, Leo is in his command center helping from the background

eventually Leo has gotten to the point where he has enough strength for day to day life most of the time, he still isn't fighting baddies on rooftops but he can get to a store and back without collapsing on a good day and that's pretty good!

the Foot Clan has been a much bigger threat in this version of S2 and it's clear they're up to something big

of course right when Leo is starting to feel stable and happy again, that's when they launch their final attack

a lot of the finale events go down similarly to how they do in canon, minus Battle Nexus New York. they get Karai back but then she dies, Shredder destroys their home (including Leo's command center :c ), everything is Bad

Leo gets his mystic powers back the same way his brothers do, though he needs a little bit of an extra helping nudge from April/Karai, since he didn't think that was a thing he could still do

everyone getting their mystic powers is emotional but it's especially emotional for Leo. he didn't even know what ninpo was before today, but he knew after the Shredder it was like some part of his soul got locked away, and now that he can feel it again he finally feels whole

it gives him a burst of adrenaline so he can participate in the fight, though he doesn't do much of the actual battling, instead getting his bros where they need to be for the big hits (I mean this is basically what he does anyway haha)

it takes Donnie exactly .02 seconds to figure out how to use his own mystic powers to support Leo physically so that helps

after this, Leo becomes a more constant part of the team in the field, though he still primarily works as support and only gets into direct fights when he feels like he has to

instead of being made leader like in canon, Leo and Raph become co-leaders. Leo's own leadership abilities have improved massively, but Raph has more experience in the field, so having the two of them working together means they cover each other's blind spots, and the division of labor is less stressful for both of them

since Leo's already been through his character development and this tension is gone the movie events play out totally differently but I haven't gotten that far yet lol. I'm sure the apocalypse still happens somehow, though, I'd hate to lose Casey Jr

happy ending whooo

Relationships

Raph

Raph feels a lot of guilt about what happened to Leo; he was supposed to protect his little brothers and he didn't, and now one of them has permanent physical disabilities as a result. add to that it was Raph's idea to be heroes in the first place and yeah... he's not doing great

because of this guilt, Raph's instinct is to essentially baby Leo - he wants to take care of his every need as soon as it arises. this makes Leo feel stifled and infantilized, and drives a wedge in their relationship (the same one Raph is driving between himself and Mikey, in fact)

his and Donnie's distinctly different approaches to the situation also mean that they get into arguments often and can't really deal with being around each other, leaving Raph feeling isolated at the start (and thus pouring more attention and effort into Leo, which compounds the problem)

Raph dealing with his own guilt and trying to find the balance between helping Leo while also respecting his need for independence, boundaries, and dignity is a big part of his journey in the AU, and it also improves his relationship with Mikey and Donnie as he gets better at those skills

Donnie

Donnie is not dealing well with the fact that there's nothing to fix. they can only be patient and work incrementally to improve Leo's condition

he distracts himself by putting all his energy into making the lair accessible for Leo, building him mobility aids and doing everything he can to help

he also has a hard time understanding why Leo won't do the things that will help him (at first), because doesn't he just want things to go back to normal? doesn't he want to help himself? why won't he just do what he obviously has to do, Donnie does not understand

Leo is deep in denial at first, and he feels like he breaks down and starts doing physical therapy and using mobility aids and doing basically any of the things that will help him, that means it's not going to magically get better, it's going to take time and effort and it will probably never be fixed, just improved, and he hates that so much he's choosing to treat this like a temporary cold or flu that will blow over any day now

Donnie doesn't understand that so he takes Leo's refusal as a rejection and animosity abounds!

breakdowns and admissions of feelings will eventually happen

Donnie and Leo together come to grips with the idea that there is no fixing this and there is no return to how things were before but they can work toward a new normal that's just as good

Mikey

this one is a little bit too big for Dr. Delicate Touch and Dr. Feelings

Mikey tries, but he is just a kid, and with their dad emotionally retreating too there's just too many feelings for him to deal with on his own

he's gonna play family therapist until he breaks

he's frustrated because he can see what each of his brothers need to do to feel better but they just! won't! they won't do it, and he doesn't know how to make them

he's really stressed

it's Mikey that realizes that Leo needs goals to work toward to get himself motivated to take care of himself, and it's Mikey who pushes the hardest for Leo's new role in the team

sometimes Mikey will challenge Leo to something silly, like who can make the most throws of a paper ball into a trash can, just to push Leo into exercising

he finds other little ways to help the others too, but he still can't solve the big problems on his own

meltdown ensues

Mikey has to learn to take care of himself, too, while the others have to learn they can't lean so hard on him for all their emotional problems

April

the only one holding on around here. it helps that she doesn't actually have to live in the powderkeg

takes a rationally minded approach to all these problems, kind of functioning like family therapist along with Mikey but in a healthier and more controlled way

helps get them resources from above ground

Leo opens up the most about his feelings about his physical condition to her first, because she strikes the best balance between being a sympathetic ear without coddling him

she's also stressed, but she has an outside support network so she's handling it better

Splinter

fully blames himself for what happened to Leo and has a hard time getting over it

depression in full swing

it means he can't easily get out of bed to help his kids, but then he feels bad because he isn't helping them, which worsens the depression, which makes it hard to get out of bed... a vicious cycle

when Leo starts working on his condition he gets a pact out of his dad that they will both work on being healthier together

maybe they manage to find an actual therapist eventually idk lol

either way, Splinter and Leo grumpily sitting over their plate of broccoli and then Leo says "bet I can eat more pieces than you" and it's on son

he's trying his best

Leo's Condition

Leo came out of the armor severely dehydrated and malnourished, even more so than any person should realistically be after two days; just keeping him from dying of the dehydration was the most immediate struggle

the main issue is that Leo's life force, mystic abilities included, were basically sucked out, leaving his body catastrophically physically weak

his muscle mass can come back with time and diet

the bigger problems are the bone density and chronic fatigue. while Leo can improve these, they'll never be back to where they were before the Dark Armor

his reduced bone density means he has to be careful doing anything physical because the chance he can break a bone is much higher than average, and he stands to suffer more from that break than the average person

he'll eventually get to where he can go through his day-to-day life just fine most days, and can even do some of the physical things he enjoyed before, he just has to be careful and know his limits. he'll never be pulling the 1440 off the halfpipe again, but he can still skateboard as long as he's careful.

even when recovered (as much as he can be), he has bad days and days when the fatigue is really strong. how Leo feels on a bad day is up in the air; sometimes he's at peace with it and generally cheerful, happy to be around his family even if he spends most of the time in his chair or on the couch dozing in and out. other days the depression rears its ugly head and he can get a bit nasty and bitter again. his family is much more patient with him on days like that than he is with himself.

in the beginning Leo also has brain fog and sensitivity to light and sound. these clear up over time, especially once Leo starts making more effort to exercise his brain. he starts reading a lot more and doing puzzles, especially things like sudoku and word puzzles, which helps a lot. thankfully these changes aren't permanent

his inner ears were also damaged a bit, this also heals up largely on its own, sometimes he still has difficulties hearing his brothers if they're whispering or far away but it's not so bad he needs assistance

Leo's Devices

Wheelchair

this is obviously the one Donnie had the most fun building and it shows. this baby is tricked out. Leo also likes to suggest improvements often, some for actual functionality but many just because he thinks it would be cool (like neon lights on the spokes)

it is blue obviously. do you even need me to tell you that?

it's fully electronic but Leo can also wheel it around freely if he wishes. Leo likes to wheel himself when he has the energy because it's good exercise he doesn't have to go out of his way for and he just likes feeling like he's moving himself under his own power. but when he's not feeling up to it he just drives it with the electronic controls instead

it has handles that extend and retract. being allowed to touch the handles is a major sign of Leo's trust and initially it's only for his bros + April + Splinter. Leo hates being moved when he doesn't actually ask to be moved, and he also hates being tipped backwards so his fam knows not to do it even as a joke (and it's so heavy that tipping him is kind of hard, anyway). someone touching the handles or messing around with them without permission gets you immediate backlash from protective siblings

that said Leo has them extended often so he can hang things off them, even though Donnie constantly gripes that that is not their intended purpose!

Sr Hueso is another person who gets handle-touching-privileges pretty fast, and he's also the one Leo asks to move him most often because he thinks it's really funny. he hams it up every time. Hueso is exasperated but does it anyway

(if Hueso adds a few extra wheelchair-accessible tables to Run of the Mill no one has to know)

the chair can also be moved by S.H.E.L.L.D.O.N. this is mostly just for emergency situations, or times when the chair is somewhere Leo is not. Shelldon is a very good boy who does not move the chair without Leo's permission.

it has a billion storage spaces and little hidey holes and it can sync with Leo's phone to play music and it also has a charge port for his phone and yeah basically anything Leo and Donnie can come up with goes into this thing. it's a behemoth

Donnie also made Leo a lighter-weight chair with fewer features that he most often uses when he's good using his walker/cane/braces but wants to clear a larger distance first, and eventually Donnie makes him an athletic wheelchair so he can play games like wheelchair basketball

Walker

the walker is also blue but there's nothing particularly special about it

Leo hates using it because it feels like an old person thing. even if realistically he knows there are plenty of reasons people use them, including his own situation, culture is culture and it makes him feel bad no matter what rationality states

so basically once he doesn't have to use it he doesn't

as they all get more comfortable with Leo's situation and he starts openly using humor to cope, jokes about Leo's chair and cane become pretty commonplace in the fam (all good-natured of course). they know the walker is too much of a sore spot though, and poking fun at it is the fastest way to get Leo to do something stupid, so no one does. it's better to just pretend it's not there

Crutches/Canes

he eventually ends up with a variety of these, with different levels of support depending on what he's needing on a given day.

some of the canes are more fashionable than others. this is important to him.

Leo pretty much always has one of these on hand just in case, even on days where he feels alright to walk on his own

he is not afraid to bonk a brother with a cane or crutch but he does so knowing they are free to retaliate

Leg Braces

Leo doesn't need these every day but they're a pretty standard part of his wardrobe at this point

they start out plain but get increasingly elaborately decorated as time goes on because he, Donnie, and Mikey can't help themselves

like the walker, the braces are in the "don't make fun of" zone, though Leo is happy to get positive comments about them and doesn't really need their presence ignored

Other Mobility Aids

Leo has a variety of things to help with his loss of grip strength, difficulties bending over, tremors, etc. all of them are either made by Donnie or ethically "acquired" by April

he drives everyone crazy by leaving them in random places and then forgetting where they are. Donnie starts installing locator tags on everything they give Leo

jokes about these are fine, Leo makes them often himself and has silly names for all of them (this also drives Donnie crazy)

[weirdkpopgirl]

Friends Who Kiss | Chenle Fic #1

Title: Friends Who Kiss

Genre: Best friends to lovers, high school/college au

Warnings: mentions of the reader being insecure and having a mental breakdown at some point. a little suggestive, but not really

Word Count: ~ 5.6k

Author's Note: Okay to be very honest, I think that this story is kinda stupid and cliché. But it was an idea that I still wanted to try writing. And this is my first full-length fic for Chenle too, so I'm happy to post something for him. So to those who like cheesy romance stories, I hope you enjoy this. Thank you for reading ^ ^

➴➵➶➴➵➶➴➵➶➴➵➶➴➵➶➴➵➶➴➵➶➴➵➶➴➵➶➴➵➶➴➵➶➴➵➶➴➵➶➴➵➶

Since the start of high school, Zhong Chenle has been a consistent part of your life. He arrived as a transfer student from Shanghai, while you were the reserved kid who often used studying as an excuse to avoid social interaction. So rather than you reaching out to him first, it was he who practically claimed you as his best friend. Your personalities were a striking contrast, but it proved to be the perfect balance. It didn't take long for the two of you to become inseparable.

However, your friendship took a turn in eleventh grade. You guys had gone to your house after school to do homework. Except it was mostly you working on assignments, while Chenle was animatedly ranting about some mobile game Jisung was terrible at playing.

“It’s unbelievable! Every time I check his character gets killed,” Chenle laughed, and you responded with a soft hum of acknowledgment.

The boy glanced up from his phone to find you engrossed in your textbooks. While your attention was focused on writing an essay, you were also trying to keep your mind from drifting to the unsettling conversation you had during lunch that day. Typically, you and Chenle sat together with his friends. But Jisung needed the boy’s help stalking his crush, so you found yourself sitting with some of the girls in your class. 

Sensing the inner conflict brewing in your mind, Chenle rose from the bed and leaned over your shoulder. 

“You've been at this since we got here. How is your brain not fried?” he asked, blunt as usual.

You shot the boy with an unappreciative glare. “It is fried. But our essay is due on Monday, and I still have to help you with yours.”

Chenle sighed, well aware of your enduring determination. Ever since he met you, he couldn’t understand why you stressed so much over assignments, especially when you always completed them before the due date. Then you somehow managed to go out of your way to ensure he was doing the same.

“You’re more than halfway finished, and I’ll get to mine on my own time,” He reassured, “Why don’t you take a break for now?”

Before you could protest, Chenle swiftly pulled you out of your chair and guided you to sit on the bed with him. Worry clouded his gaze. “Something’s troubling you, isn’t it?”

Your teeth sank into your lower lip, hating how Chenle knew you so well. He didn’t have a problem sharing what was on his mind, while you were the exact opposite. Yet, even a single look at you was enough for him to detect something was off.

“The girls at lunch were going on about their dating experiences and stuff,” you began to explain, your tone tinged with irritation at the memory. “They were all so surprised when I said I haven’t had my first kiss yet.”

You pushed yourself to meet Chenle's gaze, half dreading that he might burst into laughter. Instead, his expression held a hint of amusement, and that alone made you regret bringing up the topic.

Before he could respond, you hurriedly attempted to backtrack on your words. “It's stupid, I know—”

“It’s not stupid if it’s making you upset,” Chenle said firmly.

Leaning back in your seat, you let out an exasperated sigh. “I just can’t get their judgmental looks out of my head. All because I don’t have much experience with dating?”

Chenle's expression softened as he confessed, "There's nothing wrong with that, and there’s a lot of people like you. I haven't had my first kiss either."

“Really?!” You stared at him in disbelief. “Didn't you date Ko Mi-so though?”

Chenle scoffed, appearing slightly offended. “Okay, that happened such a long time ago. And we didn't even last a month, so we never kissed.”

Now that you thought about it, he was right about their relationship ending almost as quickly as it began. You recalled the time back in tenth grade when Chenle was quite smug about dating Mi-so, who happened to be the prettiest girl in class. Frankly, you were somewhat relieved when they broke up, given that she didn't particularly like you. Chenle hasn’t dated anyone since.

“Oh, I guess that makes sense,” your voice trailed off. 

The boy stayed silent for a moment before an idea dawned on him. “You know what? Why don’t we have our first kiss now?”

Your cheeks felt like they were competing for a world record in how quickly they heated up at Chenle's proposal. He couldn't possibly be serious.

“Did I hear you right?” you stammered, thoroughly taken aback by the suggestion.

Chenle nodded confidently, “I mean, we're best friends, so it's not that weird. And it's better than kissing someone we don't know as well or not have a connection with.”

You could kind of see his point. Having Chenle as your first kiss did seem much safer than kissing some random guy. Besides, it wasn’t like either of you had any underlying feelings for each other. This would solely be for practice.

“Alright,” you reluctantly agreed, “But you have to promise not to make fun of me if I turn out to be a bad kisser."

Chenle chuckled and nodded. He inched closer to you on the bed, leaving little space between the two of you. Although he saw you every day, having your face this near made a faint blush tinge his cheeks.

He started to lean in more before pausing. "Um, maybe you should close your eyes."

"Oh—right," you mumbled awkwardly, then took a deep breath before allowing your eyelids to shut.

He had to suppress a chuckle, finding you kinda cute in that moment. Before you had a chance to second-guess yourself, Chenle pressed his lips against yours in a tender kiss. Shortly after, he drew back, searching for your reaction.

“So, how was that?” He asked, voice laced with teasing.

You stared at him incredulously for a moment before realizing he was waiting for you to answer. “I suppose it was okay,” you mumbled.

Chenle tilted his head with an amused grin. “Just okay?”

“Yeah, I guess I didn't feel much because we're not really into each other like that,” you admitted with a nonchalant shrug.

Okay, you might have partially lied about not feeling much during the kiss. Truth be told, there was this strange, fluttery sensation in your chest when your best friend's lips grazed yours. But perhaps all first kisses were like that, and you were simply overthinking it.

The boy beside you let out a hearty laugh. “Well at least we got that over with.”

You had to muster all your self-control not to blush when he followed up with, “And you're not a bad kisser, by the way.”

Believing that the experiment was over, the two of you returned to your previous tasks. Nothing changed much after that day in your bedroom, as you and Chenle remained best friends. But little did you realize that this wouldn't be the last kiss you'd be sharing with him. 

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Despite your previous attempts to justify it, the second kiss you shared with Chenle happened partially because of you. As your senior year of high school unfolded, Chenle prepared for his performance at the spring festival. It was you who initially urged him to participate in the talent show. The countless times you had witnessed his piano playing and singing during your private moments together convinced you that he should share his talents with the world. Your compliments not only fueled Chenle’s ego but also prompted him to eagerly jot his name down on the sign-up sheet.

However, what you didn’t expect was to find him backstage, looking as pale as a ghost. He was supposed to go after a group of girls who were dancing to Red Velvet’s “Red Flavor.” With the intention of cheering him on in person, you spotted the dark-haired boy sitting on a chair, anxiously bouncing his legs.

“Last-minute jitters?" you asked softly.

Chenle glanced up at you and crossed his arms in a nonchalant manner. “What, me? I'm fine,” he replied, though his tone lacked conviction.

Just as Chenle knew you like the back of his hand, you were among the few who could read him. While he was partially correct about never being nervous, it didn't take an idiot to perceive that he was in that moment. It was evident he was trying to play it off to uphold his confident image. 

One aspect that troubled you about Chenle was his constant facade of cheerfulness and carefree demeanor. No one could genuinely be happy all the time, and he was the kind of person who concealed his negative feelings when around others.

After deliberating on how to address the situation, you gently rested your hand on his shoulder, bringing yourself to eye level with him.

“Hey, you’re going to be amazing out there,” you reassured him. “I’ve seen how many hours you put into practicing that song. You have nothing to worry about.”

Chenle let out a heavy sigh. “Yeah, you're right.”

The smile he bestowed upon you didn't quite convince you. Biting your lip in hesitation, you glanced around to ensure no one else was nearby. Once you were sure that you were alone, you leaned down and gently planted a kiss on the boy’s forehead. Chenle’s eyes widened in surprise at your actions.

“What was that for?”

Blushing, you took a step back and stammered, “Just for good luck, you know. I—I’ll be right there in the crowd, watching you. So if you feel nervous on stage, just look at me.”

A more reassured smile spread across Chenle’s lips and before he stood up to swiftly peck you on the lips, leaving you more stunned than he was a few seconds ago.

“There, I definitely feel more ready now,” he declared with a teasing glint. And the smug Chenle you were familiar with had returned.

As Chenle’s playfulness lingered in the air, the sound of the audience clapping erupted for the girls, putting an end to your “moment.” With a knowing look, you both parted ways, allowing Chenle to step into the spotlight for his performance.

As he took the stage, you found a spot in the crowd, eyes fixed on him with awe. The rhythm of the applause filled the air, drowning out any lingering thoughts. In that moment, the stage became his world, and you couldn't help but be swept away by the magic of his talent. The earlier exchange faded into the background as you watched Chenle shine, each note and melody weaving a captivating spell that left you in admiration.

Neither of you mentioned the kiss after that day. The interaction remained more platonic than anything, a gesture that was only meant to show your support for him. But Chenle still liked to think he killed the stage because of it.

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Chenle was undeniably responsible for the next time the two of you kissed. However, this particular incident didn't unfold until the first semester of your freshman year in college. The joy of discovering you both had been accepted into the same university was palpable, though Chenle appeared to be more exuberant about the news. In contrast, you felt a sense of relief, grateful that you wouldn't be venturing into the world of college alone.

In one of your classes, a sunbae began to show interest in you. Despite your attempts to politely reject him, it became apparent that he wasn't willing to accept no for an answer. 

One day after class, he cornered you in the hallway, insisting that you go out with him. As you tried to maintain your composure, he grabbed you by the wrist when you tried to walk away. The harsh move triggered internal panic within you.

You could sense the danger in his tone as his head tilted cockily. “Come on, (Y/n), don’t be so difficult. I know you’re just playing hard to get.”

“I—I’m sorry but I just don’t feel the same as you, Sunbae,” you stuttered, trying to be assertive. “Please let go.”

Refusing to relent, the sunbae was on the verge of pulling you in closer when another hand intervened, forcefully ripping you out of his grasp. Your head turned in astonishment to see Chenle casting a disgusted look at the guy in front of you. The flames in Chenle’s eyes made you realize that you had never seen him so livid before.

“She said to let go of her. What part of that do you not understand?” Chenle’s voice cut through the tension.

The sunbae scoffed and crossed his arms in defense, “Yah, who are you to involve yourself in someone else’s matters? Are you her boyfriend or something?”

You watched as the corner of Chenle’s lips turned into a smirk as he snaked an arm around your waist in a protective gesture. 

“That’s right. So who are you to go after another man’s girlfriend?” he retorted confidently. Your eyes widened, almost surprised as the jerk in front of you.

Shaking his head in a mix of disbelief and embarrassment, the sunbae pointed a finger at you. “This is a joke, right? You just asked him to pretend to be your boyfriend to mess with me!”

Before you could respond, Chenle took matters into his own hands. His free hand briskly moved to the back of your neck, drawing you in for a passionate kiss. In a typical situation, your best friend's impulsive actions might have freaked you out immediately. However, the way his fingers delicately pressed against your back reassured you that he was doing this for your sake, Closing your eyes, you kissed back and tried to reciprocate with the same passion Chenle was pouring.

Moments later, Chenle pulled away and turned to the sunbae, wearing a satisfied grin on his face. “Do you believe her now? Not that she has to prove anything to you.”

The older male muttered begrudgingly under his breath, “Whatever, not worth my time.”

With a scowl, he stormed off, leaving behind a palpable sense of relief in the wake of his departure. Once he was gone, you removed yourself from Chenle's hold and shot him a look of confusion.

“You know you didn’t have to do that right?” 

Chenle chuckled, “Well, someone had to put an end to his nonsense. Besides, I've always wanted to play the protective boyfriend card.”

“Protective boyfriend? You almost gave me a heart attack!” You smacked him on the shoulder.

Chenle’s smirk remained, but he adopted a more concerned tone. “But seriously, (Y/n), why didn’t you tell me he was bothering you earlier?”

“I thought I could handle things on my own.” You shrugged weakly, lowering your head in guilt.

Chenle sighed, recognizing your aversion to depending on others for your problems. Throughout the time he’d known you, he'd witnessed your willingness to go to great lengths to help those you cared about. However, when it came to your own struggles, you seemed to prefer suffering in silence.

“We’re best friends for a reason,” he reminded you, “Looking after each other is 50/50, you know?”

You offered him a small smile, “I guess you’re right. Thanks for saving me today.”

“Well, you can thank me by buying food tonight,” Chenle said, the playful glint returning to his eyes. “It’s your turn anyway.”

Rolling your eyes, you let him lead you out of the building. But Chenle’s words from earlier lingered in the back of your mind. “We’re best friends for a reason.” 

The two of you were the epitome of what best friends were. And that was all the two of you would ever be, right?

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At this point, you were beginning to lose count of the number of times you’ve kissed your best friend. Despite this, your friendship maintained its familiar rhythm throughout the university. But after that hallway encounter, the awkwardness that came with kissing your best friend faded. Although it was more of Chenle seeming unfazed, and you becoming less surprised each time it happened. And indeed, there were a few more instances that caused your lips to meet.

Like the time Chenle excitedly dragged you to his dorm to watch a Golden State Warriors game, and, in the heat of the moment, he gave you a quick kiss before cheering some more. Then there was the other time when you both went out for drinks with friends, a few drunken kisses were shared.

There weren't any real feelings attached to the kisses you and Chenle shared. At least, that was what you repeatedly told yourself. However, as you were halfway through your first year of university, you finally started to question the true nature of your friendship with Zhong Chenle.

Those thoughts began to sink in just before your first finals in college. Isolated in your dorm room, you immersed yourself in studying for a math exam scheduled in three days. Calls and texts from friends went largely ignored as you turned off your phone in an attempt to focus. However, Chenle wasn't about to let that slide. 

One night, he let himself into your dorm, carrying a bag of your favorite takeout—knowing well that you tended to skip meals when stressed. You could see the determination in his face, ready to scold you. But the expression quickly transitioned to one of concern when he caught you on the verge of a breakdown. 

You sat at your desk surrounded by textbooks and notebooks filled with scribbled equations. The sight of your trembling body and slightly tousled hair, a result of pulling on it too hard, tugged at Chenle’s heart. He was well aware of how your anxiety affected you at times. But he had never witnessed it manifest quite like this.

Instantly, the bag was placed on the floor, and he was at your side. “(Y/n), what's wrong?" 

“I—I'm going to fail my calc final,” you swallowed, your fingers curling into fists. Your shoulders slumped, and the weight of despair was evident in the way you hunched over the desk.

He placed a hand on your shoulder, attempting to calm you down. “You still have a few weeks before finals, (Y/n). And you’re not going to fail.”

“Yes, I am!” you cut him off, your voice strained. Tears welled up in your eyes, and your hands clenched even tighter. “I’ve been studying for days, and my dumb brain still doesn't understand anything. Do you know how stupid I feel?”

“Being bad at math doesn’t make you stupid, (Y/n),” Chenle said, trying to inject a bit of lightheartedness into the situation. However, his comment didn’t seem to offer you any comfort.

You shook your head miserably in response. “Stop trying to be nice. I'm going to fail, and then I’ll end up letting down my parents and everyone else.”

Chenle’s heart ached at the defeat in your voice. Setting his jokes aside, he recognized that words weren’t what you needed at the moment. Instead, he enveloped you in a warm embrace. You hesitated only briefly before surrendering to his comforting hold, attempting to fight back tears.

“Just let it out,” he whispered.

Those simple words acted as an emotional release trigger, and Chenle found himself gently rubbing your back as you quietly cried into his shoulder. A sense of mixed emotions flooded him as he held you in that moment. A part of him felt a twinge of relief, grateful that you let him be there for you. You often kept your emotions bottled up, making it a challenge for him to discern how you truly felt at times. 

However, there was a pang of sadness accompanying that satisfaction. He knew you didn't just cry in front of anyone, and realizing that you had reached this breaking point signaled the depth of your struggle.

After a while, Chenle gently pulled back, brushing a loose strand of hair behind your ear. “You need a break, (Y/n). Let’s step away from the desk for a bit.”

"No, I really should—" you began to protest, but Chenle cut you off.

"You really should eat the food I brought you before it gets cold," he insisted, picking up the bag again.

He led you to sit on the carpet of your cramped dorm room, creating a makeshift dining space for the two of you. As you both shared a meal, Chenle continued to provide a comforting presence, occasionally cracking a joke to lighten the atmosphere.

As the night wore on, the exhaustion in your eyes became more prominent. Even so, you knew you should go back to studying. But Chenle seemed to disagree.

“Maybe you should just rest for the night. I promise to help you with math in the morning,” he suggested. However, upon seeing the unconvinced look you gave him, he backtracked on his words. “Okay, I'll have Renjun help you.”

Too tired to argue, you gave in, and that's how you found yourself lying in bed with your best friend. Back in high school, you used to have sleepovers at his house on the weekends. At night, the two of you would be lying on his bed, staring up at the ceiling and talking about anything. However, having him beside you at that moment felt strange. 

You saw a sincere tenderness reflected in those large eyes of his. A part of you wondered if Chenle often gazed at you with such fondness and you simply hadn’t noticed before. Either way, the way he was looking at you made you feel even stranger. And the short silence that had settled between the two of you wasn’t helping.

Uncertain of how much longer you could endure the intensity, you broke eye contact with him and murmured, “Thank you for always being there for me, even when I try to push you away”

Chenle chuckled, adjusting his position to prop himself up on his elbow. “Well, of course, because how could you live without me?”

His ability to joke at a time like this struck you as unfathomable. Instead of the usual eye roll or pushing off the bed, a serious expression remained etched on your face. 

“You're right, I don't think I can live without you,” you said, your voice laced with drowsiness. “Because you’re one of the few people who truly care about me.”

The amusement in his eyes danced away, as he felt the gravity of your words. Something about seeing this vulnerable side of you was so beautiful in his eyes. Before he could fully process his own thoughts, Chenle found himself leaning in to close the space between you with his lips meeting your own.

Uncertain whether it was the leftover stress from your meltdown or the sleep deprivation that prompted you to kiss back without much thought. You could recall all the times you’ve kissed Chenle throughout the years. But this one would always stand out to you.

This kiss lasted a lot longer than your previous ones. But it wasn’t just the way he tilted your chin upward for a better angle, or the feeling of his dark locks of hair slipping between your fingers. Nor was it the soft pressure of his lips moving in sync with yours. It was the indescribable emotions that made time seem to stand still, weaving an unspoken connection that surpassed words and left you yearning for more.

Aside from pulling away, both of you gasping for breath, and noticing how Chenle's lips were redder than you had ever seen them, you vaguely recalled what happened after the kiss. When you woke up the next morning, Chenle was already gone. However, he had left you a text message, mentioning that he went to check if Renjun could help tutor you in math.

But math was no longer the sole stressor in your mind. Your best friend had kissed you last night, and unlike all the other times, this one left you feeling more confused than ever. 

▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃

True to his word, Renjun offered to meet up with you that Sunday afternoon at the campus library. Within an hour of sitting down to unravel the calculus concept that eluded you, Renjun finally helped you grasp the material. Although the looming fear of failing finals had diminished, you still felt a weight on your shoulders.

“You don’t seem as relieved as I thought you’d be,” Renjun remarked lightheartedly. Even he could tell your mind was preoccupied with something else.

You smiled sheepishly, “No, I am! I seriously owe you for helping me out. I just…”

“Is it something to do with Chenle?” he asked, almost like he was a mind reader.

His unexpected question caught you off guard. “How did you know?” you stammered, feeling the heat quickly rise to your cheeks.

A knowing smile played on the boy’s lips as he leaned back in his seat. “Oh come on, (Y/n). You have that look on your face that something happened between the two of you.”

Sometimes you seriously wished Renjun wasn’t so good at reading people. Even though you weren’t as close to him as Chenle was, he’s known you long enough to notice things that others wouldn’t. For instance, when something was troubling you.

Biting your lip, you debated whether to be truthful with Renjun. Although you didn't typically share your problems with others, you recognized that confiding in someone at a time like this was necessary to maintain your sanity.

“Chenle kissed me last night,” you tossed the statement out in the air, hoping you wouldn’t regret it.

Renjun’s eyes widened at this revelation, “He did?!”

“Well you see, we’ve kissed before. But this time it felt different,” you clarified, baffling the boy across from you even more. Internally cringing, you were acutely aware of how bad this sounded.

Before he could question, you continued to elaborate. “Look, it's not as complicated as it sounds. It’s just ever since we agreed to be each other’s first kiss, Chenle and I just keep having these…accidental kisses. Whether it’s out of excitement or to get guys hitting on me to go away.”

Renjun listened quietly as you recounted all the other times you’ve kissed Chenle. When you circled back to the previous night, you felt more conflicted than ever.

“But the kiss last night left me feeling so confused,” you confessed, running a hand through your hair. “Initially, I thought he was just doing it out of comfort, but now I’m not so sure.”

“Well, have you considered the possibility that he has feelings for you?” Renjun inquired, crossing his arms. His suggestion sounded so simple, yet it felt like navigating uncharted territory in your mind.

You shook your head in denial. “N—No, I mean we’ve been best friends for five years. He can’t possibly see me that way.”

“Like that’s ever stopped friends from falling for each other,” Renjun cocked his head. “It doesn’t take a genius to know that he likes you, (Y/n).”

His point made you mentally curse. If you looked at your history with Chenle from an objective point of view, the two of you certainly didn’t act like normal best friends.

“And, it’s pretty obvious that you like him too,” Renjun added, twirling the pencil between his fingers.

His statement left you feeling exposed, as if you had been caught red-handed committing a crime. Laughing nervously, you shook your head, “Renjun, we’re just friends. I…I don’t see him that way.”

Renjun raised an eyebrow, “Friends who kiss? Did you really not feel anything in those moments?”

Your teeth sank further into your lower lip as Renjun’s question hit you. The reality of your feelings for Chenle lingered in the air, challenging the facade you had built to convince yourself otherwise. It was like trying to hold sand in your fists, slipping away no matter how tightly you clenched. The truth, however inconvenient, seemed to be unraveling before you.

“I…I did feel something,” you slowly admitted, “But I never said anything because I didn’t want our friendship to change. It just seemed easier to pretend those moments were nothing more than accidents.”

Renjun’s eyes softened with understanding. “Well maybe a little change is what you need in your friendship.”

Maybe Renjun was onto something, perhaps change was necessary. In the past, you had always held out on dating, using the excuse that you were waiting for the right person. Despite the fear of potential rejection, what if Chenle was the person you had been waiting for all along?

▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃

Chenle’s living room bathed in the gentle glow of the TV screen, a familiar sight during your Friday movie nights since college began. It was supposed to be a time to unwind, to escape the pressures of school for a little while. However, instead of the usual peaceful and easygoing atmosphere, an unspoken tension hung in the air tonight. Beyond picking a movie and deciding who made the popcorn, you and Chenle barely talked. The weight of the unspoken words made the space feel suffocating, and you couldn't shake the feeling of unease that settled in your chest.

Unable to endure the weighty silence any longer, you turned your head to make a lame comment about the movie. However, before you could speak, Chenle beat you to it.

“Can we talk?” His voice carried a hint of restlessness, an unusual departure from his usual tone.

Trying to maintain a casual demeanor, you lightly nodded. With your acknowledgment, Chenle exhaled deeply and sat up straighter to face you properly.

“I know how crazy this might sound,” he started, running a hand through his hair. “But I’ve been thinking, and I don’t think we can stay friends.”

His words felt like a gun being pointed at your chest, panic surged within you as you tried to process the boy’s words. Of all the ways you predicted this conversation could go, this was not one of them.

“What do you mean?” you asked, your voice even smaller than his.

Noticing the perplexity in your eyes, Chenle continued. “You see, I've been in love with you for—I don’t know how long. But I spent all these years burying my feelings like a fool, because I never thought you’d see me that way. Yet, every time we kiss, it becomes harder for me to ignore my feelings for you.”

Chenle glanced down at his folded hands, vulnerability seeping into those brown orbs of his. “The other night made me realize that I don’t want to just be friends who kiss anymore. I want to be something more to you.”

His words lingered in the air now that they were out in the open. Your heart raced faster than it ever has before, as your cheeks flushed with heat. Chenle’s eyes bore into yours, his expression nervous yet hopeful. 

For a moment, you were left speechless. But you still had the sense to hit him on the shoulder, scolding, “Oh my gosh, you can’t start a conversation like that, Chenle. You scared me!”

The boy chuckled sheepishly, rubbing his shoulder. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to do that. But seriously, (Y/n), I meant what I said.”

A mix of emotions played on your face before you quietly admitted, “Honestly, I’ve wanted to be something more to you since that day we kissed in my bedroom.”

You noticed a smile of relief beginning to form on his lips, but you held up a finger before he could say anything. Now that he had taken the first step, you decided it was time for you to do the same.

“But I kept trying to convince myself that all the times we kissed were accidental or just for comfort,” you confessed, looking directly into his eyes. “And the reason I’ve been pushing away my feelings for you was because I was afraid of losing a friend who means the world to me.”

His hand rested on top of yours, the light touch sending a shiver down your spine. “You don’t have to be afraid because you’ll never lose me, (Y/n).”

The softness and sincerity in his eyes made you want to cry for some inexplicable reason. You once believed that confessing your feelings for Chenle would only lead to frustration and heartbreak. However, as you sat here with him, holding his hand, those worries seemed to vanish.

“So…what do we do now?” you asked, unsure of what was supposed to come next in these situations.

A mischievous glint danced in his eyes as he grinned. “I think this is the part where we kiss. But you know, as boyfriend and girlfriend.”

Just as you were processing his words, he moved closer, his breath warm against your skin, making your heart flutter. His eyes searched yours for permission. 

“Well, what are you waiting for then?” you whispered.

With that, the distance between you closed, and your lips met in a tender kiss. It was a sweet surrender, a culmination of years of friendship and suppressed feelings. Although this wasn’t your first kiss with Chenle, it felt that way in a sense. For you could finally savor the tender feeling of his lips without questioning the intention behind it.

In that moment, all you focused on was the way Chenle had his hand on the small of your back, guiding you closer as he deepened the kiss. Your fingers found their way to rest on the nape of his neck, feeling the warmth of his skin. 

Although the change in this dynamic had just begun, this newfound connection promised countless moments of shared laughter, whispered confessions, and the sweet warmth of shared kisses. You had a feeling that you could easily get used to this beautiful new normal. By the way Chenle smiled during the kiss, you could tell he felt the same way.

➴➵➶➴➵➶➴➵➶➴➵➶➴➵➶➴➵➶➴➵➶➴➵➶➴➵➶➴➵➶➴➵➶➴➵➶➴➵➶➴➵➶

[piss-pumpkin]

Sober confessions (are a little better) - Leo valdez x reader

Part 2 of drunken confessions (kind of suck), ~3.3k words, gn reader Masterlist

Leo was in shock. It took every ounce of willpower not to burst into flames as you froze for a moment, caught off guard. “I what?” You asked, dumbstruck. What really got to him though was your face. He knew you well enough to see the subtle blush, and the suppressed smile. 

But good or bad, that was the question. Leo laughed along, doing his best to play cool while his mind raced. “Yeah,” he giggled, averting his eyes casually by looking at the phone. “You had me blushing and everything,” he joked. Okay, that was a safe answer. Not saying he rejected you, or that he wanted to accept. Neutral mostly, if a little flirty. Leo’s eyes were trained on the phone screen, wide and wild as he fought a nervous smile and tried to mask it with a flirty one. 

“I did?” You asked, baffled. In his peripheral he could see you do the same as him, stare at your food. Okay, now he could look at you, if you weren’t looking at him. For just a moment he wondered if it was his brain that was on fire, with logic like that. He quickly shook it off. 

He got one glance in before he folded, eyes immediately darting back to the phone, which he just now realized was off, and had been for at least a minute. Shit. He turned in on, and opened a random app. In just a look he saw your wide eyes, flushed face and your hand covering your mouth, but by your eyes he could tell your pained smile. Double shit. Was drunk you onto something? Leo stared at a dumb mobile game and somehow managed to form words, “yeah,” he laughed. “You were pretty smooth.”

You cringed, and Leo decided he might be the worst guy around at reading signals, and actually you might just be embarrassed about confessing to a guy like him. You hummed awkwardly, “Oh, that’s… something.”

Something? Leo winced, waiting for you to say more. But more never came, and an awkward silence filled the air, which was somehow worse than a more awkward conversation. 

You finally spoke, “Like, for real? For actually? I actually did that?”

Leo purse his lips, pausing a moment. To tell you, or not to tell you? He could probably still lie, or make a joke of it. But he promised not too. “What, you can’t believe it? It’s true, you a little smooth when you’re drunk,” he smiled cautiously. 

You looked over at him curiously, and the blush across your face confused him just a little bit. “Wha-what did you say?” You asked, puzzled. 

Well shit. “Uh,” he started, looking for the easiest answer. Or best answer. How to say no, but I wanted to say yes. But I can’t say yes. And you don’t want me to, not really. And I don’t want to say yes, actually, because it sucks you only like me when you’re fucked up. “No?” He said. “I-I said no, I guess.”

”Oh,” you said simply, looking back at your food.

And suddenly Leo felt very small. In a bad way, he decided. Sometimes small could be good, people like small things, some people think they’re cute. But Leo felt small like a grain of sand or dirt that gets stuck in your shoe, a constant bother but hard to shake. He wasn’t sure why he needed to defend himself on this, “Well, it’s not like I could say yes,” he laughed. “Besides, it’s not like you meant it.”

You nodded, “Right.” And he couldn’t read your expression, a language he was usually fluent in. 

Panic. “Right?” He asked, trying to play it off, brow raised like he as teasing.

You looked over at him and smiled softly, nodding again, more confidently this time. “Right,” you affirmed, and stood up, plate in hand. “I think you tell me one more thing I did last night I’ll combust, so I’m gonna go catch up on whatever my chores are, alright?” You laughed warmly. “See ya later?”

Leo swallowed, nodded, “Yeah, later.”

And then you were off, first to burn what was left for the gods, and then out of the dining pavilion. And Leo was alone, and hoped nobody was around to hear that borderline painful conversation. He was certain he’d never struck out worse, in all the times he flirted around camp. And he didn’t even have to try this time. What an achievement. 

                                              …

This were bad. Your legs were shaking in your compelling mortified state as you walked out. And as soon as you turned a corner out of sight of the pavilion, you broke into a speed walk, then jog, then sprint back to your cabin. Oh my gods. You only got a few weird looks as you ran, and your head only hurt a little bit as it bobbed up and down with the steps. That was good, at least. 

You shut the door behind you, and ran your fingers through your hair. Okay. Time to take stock of your dead, you supposed. You made a fool of yourself asking out Leo, and got rejected. Rejected? You dramatically collapsed on your bed. Rejected. By Leo. 

What to do? Apologize? Act like it never happened? Something dramatic? Avoid him? Forever? You stared out the window at the trees a moment. You probably embarrassed him, too. Ugh. You dragged your hands across your face, pulling the skin. You half wanted to peel it off. Yikes. 

Leo was far from the only person at camp you thought you’d have a shot with, but he was definitely the only one you could want. And you just had to go ruin that. 

You spent a fair amount of time lamenting in your cabin, then a good stretch doing chores like you said. And did your best to keep busy as long as you could, and keep your head empty, without a thought of what had happened. At least nobody else knew. Whenever people from last night felt like talking to you, they brought up the other shenanigans, and you could have fun remembering, or hearing about your exploits. Distractions. 

But the sun was setting, and you were getting restless. Ignoring problems only worked for so long, and sometimes letting them fester was worse. Damage control. You should nip this in the bud. If you payed the right cards, maybe you could recover. 

You were just finishing cleaning up the arts and crafts station, when you nodded to yourself. Yeah. Good plans. Maybe you could save yourself. Half the work was done for you, he already believed it was just the alcohol.  

You started to the bunker, not bothering to check his cabin. He was probably working alone, at this time of day. The sun was going down, and the sky was turning a purple haze. You half hoped you were wrong, and Leo was somewhere around seeing the pretty colours. 

You knew the code, one of few with the privilege of walking in without knocking. And of course, you were right, and hopes wrong. There he was. 

“Hey,” you said softly, coming up beside him. He looked up at you with his wide brown eyes, and you cringed a little, hoping you didn’t ruin your friendship with him. You could live with losing your chances with him, but your whole relationship? No shot. “Uh, I just wanted to say… sorry about last night?” You said, offering an only slightly awkward smile. “Must have been really awkward for you.”

Leo smiled as he looked up at you, cringing with his eyes. “Yeah, little bit,” he laughed, then waved his hand, dropping the metal he was tinkering with. “But it’s fine, Y/n, no need to apologize.”

Well that’s good. You sighed in relief. At least things were good. He seemed at ease. Maybe recovery could be easy. With a smile, you hopped up onto the desk beside him to sit, like usual. At least things weren’t weird. You groaned, resting the back of your head against the wall behind you. “At least I don’t remember, because I’d probably be even more mortified that way.”

Leo snickered rolling his eyes, “If you only knew.”

You raised your brow, “Dude,” you said, laughing. “Are you holding out on me? Did I do something even worse than…” you paused, not wanting to bring it up, like that would make it stuck in his head more. “Embarrassing myself completely?”

He paused, and you knew him well enough to know that was his thinking face. You braced yourself, preparing for the worst, for you to have done the most embarrassing thing you could imagine, whatever that was. You probably shouldn’t have even asked, now that you think about it. Ignorance is bli-

But he interrupted your train of thought, “Well, you always, do that,” Leo laughed, smiling softly at his hands. He quickly looked back up to you and laughed, “try to ask me out, that is.”

What. You stared at him. The fuck. “I do not,” you asserted, shaking your head. Because that would be absurd. 

Leo rolled his eyes. “Yeah,”  he said, like it was obvious. “Ya do.”

But if that were true, then he’d have rejected you… how many times? And just never felt like mentioning it. No chance, if that was true, you’re probably just die. Right there on the table. “Yeah, no I don’t,” you said again, somehow more confidently. “Now you’re fucking with me.”

As much as you wanted to maintain what little dignity you had, Leo didn’t look like he was fucking with you. He was smiling, but softly, tiredly even. His mischievous grin that came out when he joked. He looked too serious for this, even if he did laugh, “Yeah, no.” He shook his head, “I’m for realsies.”

But you already knew that. Even if you denied it. If you confessed once and didn’t remember, why not twice? Three times? More? Ugh. You cringed, shrinking into yourself. “That… doesn’t sound fun,” you said, leaning your head back to stare at the ceiling. But you couldn’t resist glancing down at him, as hard as you tried. “For either of us.”

“Yeah,” he sighed, staring at the floor with an awkward smile. “It’s kind of awkward, having to reject you, pretty much every time you drink,” he admitted. “I kind of hate it.”

You swallowed, completely understanding why he looked at the floor. But he seemed to have a stronger will than you, his eyes didn’t waver like yours did. Sighing, you resolved to do better, looking at the ceiling, and this time not looking back. “You hate the idea of me liking you?” You asked, wincing. It came out far weaker than you’d have liked. 

He cracked a smile, leaning his head back on his chair, now staring at the ceiling. “Not the idea, just the practice,” he said, brow furrowed. “I mean, what am I even supposed to say when you do that?”

Yes? You thought. But didn’t say it. He’d already rejected you once today, it seemed. No need to make it twice. “You could have told me, you know,” you said, pulling your feet up where you sat, so your head could rest on your knees. “If you hate it so much. Maybe if you told me, I might stop.”

Leo paused, lips pursed, and then picked up his scrap metal again, and a few wires and bolts. He started to fidget as he spoke, “Well, I thought it would make things weird.”

You snickered, “I guess you weren’t wrong.”

You heard Leo let out a small laugh through his nose, “Yeah, guess so.”

Leo’s workshop bunker was never truly silent. Even when there was nobody to speak, there was always the low rumble of a machine, occasionally the soft hum of the forge, often the sound of Leo tinkering. So you couldn’t really say it was an awkward silence, but it was damn close. 

Leo looked like there was more he wanted to say, brow furrowed and face scrunched as he wired a small contraption with calloused fingers. He sighed, “sorry, I probably shouldn’t have even brought it up, you were just drunk.” He looked up at you, tired smile on his lips. “Believe it or not, it was your idea for me to tell you.”

You spared him a glance, doing your best to meet his eyes. “Yeah,” you said, looking away again. Those eyes were too much. “I guess last night I was just full of bad ideas.”

”Yeah,” he snickered. “Bad ideas.”

You offered him a reluctant smile. “At least now we can forget about it, yeah?” 

Leo nodded, returning the same soft smile, “consider it forgotten.”

You smiled, less reluctant this time. For better or for worse, at least things could go back to normal. It was easier to look at him now, his eyes fallen onto the project in his hands as he leaned over his desk to grab parts. You pulled your phone out of your pocket, the silence feeling much more comfortable now. “If only I had this last night, all the shenanigans could have been documented,” you laughed. Your camera roll was empty.

Leo grinned up at you, “There’s always next time, right?”

“That means you’ve got to come next time, too,” you smiled, lightly kicking him. 

He shrugged, soft smile on his lips, “Well shit, how could I say no now?”

”You can’t,” you smirked. The empty camera roll needed fixing, that was certain. You turned slightly, opening the camera and holding the phone in front of you at a high angle. “Be my first picture?” You asked, looking down at him.

Wordlessly, he posed, dramatically winking and giving a thumbs up to the camera, and you snapped the shot. “Nice,” you said. It was a good first photo.

You turned to show him, but lost the will immediately. Leo was looking up at you rather intensely, lips pursed. He answered before you could ask, “Actually, Y/n, I know we just said to forget about… that whole thing,” he said, pushing his chair back and resting his feet in the table next to you. “But… I sorta promised you last night that I’d talk about it.”

Oh. You swallowed. Okay. Maybe you weren’t in the clear yet. 

                                            …

Leo was really doing it. He sighed, palms sweaty as metal pieces and wires idly bounced between them as he tried to calm his nerves. “Y/n, I don’t want to forget the things you say when you’re drunk, because they’re so…” he winced, tying to find the words that wouldn’t make him sound as pathetic as this felt. “…so nice, I guess.”

For a good moment, Leo was certain that came off horribly. But you didn’t seem to think so, looking at him with wide eyes, mouth hung slightly open. Maybe surprised. 

Leo pursed his lips. You were waiting for him to say more, and who was he if he didn’t fold when you looked at him like that? “I guess I just wish you liked me when you’re sober,” he said finally, shaking his head, eyes lowering. Yeah. That was it. Straight to the point.

“Leo, I-“ you started, reaching a hand out to him. He held his breath as you hesitated, and released when you put your hand down at the edge of the table in front of him. “Leo, I like you when I’m sober.”

Leo smiled, laughing through his nose. He scooted his chair closer again, resting an elbow beside your hand so he could hold up his head as he looked up at you. “Yeah, I know,” he chuckled. “But not like that.”

You pursed your lips, deathly still, but your eyes moved to the floor. 

Leo stopped you before you could respond, free hand up in the air like surrender. “Hey, and I’m not asking you too,” he said, doing his best to maintain his causal smile. He laughed, “I just… hey, we’re both full of dumb ideas. I guess I just wanted to tell you.” That might have been a lie. Telling you was the last thing he wanted. But here he was. 

You stared for a moment, and Leo could feel his heart beating in his throat. Then you laughed, covering your mouth, and he gulped, preparing for the worst. “Leo,” you said, hand barely covering a smile. “Leo, oh my gods.”

Leo paused, scrunching his brow. Huh? This could go very bad. Or maybe good? You didn’t seem mad, at least. 

Smiling at the floor, you scooted closer, until you were sitting just in front of him, smirking down. He must have looked like an idiot, staring up at you with wide eyes and confused the way he was. But that wasn’t unusual for him. “Leo I think your only dumb idea was liking me,” you laughed, head resting in your hands. 

Now Leo was officially puzzled. He stared dumbly at you. Blinked once, twice, and then realized he should probably say something. The laughing was involuntary, and he was about fifty percent sure he liked what you were saying. “Ha,” he exclaimed. “Like that was my idea,” he said rolling his eyes, “that was all you.”

You giggled, and for a moment Leo thought he saw you blush for a moment. “Leo I might have another bad idea,” you said, leaning closer towards him. 

Okay, that might be a sign, Leo thought, perhaps even a signal. He also thought he might combust, or at least burst into flames if not explode right there. But when you smiled down at him, face maybe a foot from his, it all left his brain. Not a single thought at all. “What… is it?” he asked awkwardly, grinning like a dork. 

“I think,” you started, “that we should totally kiss, wouldn’t that be awesome?” you said, resting your forehead on his. 

Leo flinched as your heads touched, for a split second retracting to avoid burning you. He felt hot. Burning. But not on fire. Before you could pull back too and lose the moment, he bridged the gap, eyes pressed shut, didn’t burn up, and kissed you. Oh my Gods. He was half shocked when you didn’t pull away, and had a heart attack when you kissed back, wide smile on your lips.

You giggled when you pulled back, “Hey, we should do that more often.”

Leo was grinning like an idiot, looking up at you. Wow you were pretty. And he wasn’t entirely sure this was real, he could swear he’s had this exact daydream once. But never so vivid. He shook his head, laughing. “Y/n, you’re the worst,” he giggled, letting his head fall into his hands.

”You don’t mean that,” you laughed, playfully hitting him on the shoulder. 

He couldn’t help but smile more into his hands, “no, I don’t,” he said, shaking his head. “How could I, after that?”

He heard you let it a small nose laugh, and felt your hand on his. Without a seconds hesitation he let you move his hands away, and replace them with your own as you guided his head up to look at you again. He leaned gently on your hand as you spoke, “Leo, I’m sorry I made you think I- I only liked you when I’m drunk,” you said, eyes not leaving his face. “Because thats not true.”

Leo, for a moment scared you might pull your hands back, covered them in his own. And he thought your hands were the only place he could ever want to rest his head. “Well, you did a great job proving me wrong,” he snickered. 

You smiled, “that’s my favourite thing to do, actually.”

”Wanna do it again?” He grinned. 

Anyway. Teehee I was kicking my feet a little writing this one ngl.

Taglist: I’m just gonna tag everyone who asked for this in the first post lmao lmk if you want tag removed @annybah @nottherealslimshady @bellamysnatblida

[onceuponaoneshotfanfic]

And darlin', you had turned my bed into a sacred oasis

Part of my Birthday Bash!

Request: "i'm in my bed, you're in your bed. one of us is in the wrong place." with Roy x teacher!Reader

Roy Kent x Teacher!Reader

2.4k words (a bit longer than intended, hope that's alright 😝)

Warnings: Language, takes place in the Teach Me Tonight universe (future established relationship), fingering, unprotected sex, Roy has kind of an innocence kink I guess, dirty talk

Late Sunday night, you sighed as you pulled your oversized t-shirt over your head. Roy had been gone all weekend at an away game and, if you were being very honest with yourself, you really missed him. The two of you had only been seeing each other for a short time, but you were already falling hard and fast for the man, even harder and faster than your initial crush on him had formed. And spending a whole weekend- your only true relaxation time- apart had you falling into a bit of a funk. You’d done your best to keep busy with grading things, with folding that laundry you’d been avoiding, with reading the book Roy had loaned you, and of course you tuned in to the Greyhounds match. But fuck, you missed Roy Kent.

As if the brooding coach could read your mind, his name lit up the mobile that was charging on your nightstand. Forgetting about the online tips that said to let a guy wait for a few rings before answering his calls, you snatched the phone off the charger and quickly answered.

“Hi, Roy!”

“Hey yourself, gorgeous,” he hummed, his gruff voice sending a blush to your cheeks. “Finally fucking home.”

You laid down, grinning from ear to ear. “Yeah, I didn’t think you’d call tonight,” you admitted. “Kind of figured when you got home, you’d just collapse into bed and knock out.”

“Well, I did that first part,” he chuckled. “But I wanted to hear your voice. Fucking missed you.”

The sweet words coming out of that famously foul mouth had butterflies forming in your tummy, the way they always did when you thought about Roy. “I missed you too,” you admitted quietly. “I caught the match, by the way. The guys did amazing! Good job, Coach.”

“Thanks.” There was something thick in his voice, something not quite right.

Immediately concerned, you sat up a little, brows furrowed. “Everything alright, Roy?”

He paused for a moment. “I just… have something of a problem.”

“Anything I can help with?” you offered. Helping Roy was kind of fun, you had discovered: ideas for outings with Phoebe, classroom management tips that transferred onto the pitch, reorganizing his garage, anything that resulted in time with Roy and a kiss of gratitude.

“Well, you see-” The something thick in his voice was suddenly identifiable: desire. “-I’m in my bed, you're in your bed. One of us is in the wrong fucking place."

Heat rose in your cheeks, down your chest and tummy, and settled somewhere deep. “O-oh really?”

Roy had this… habit of making you feel more turned on than any man you’d ever met. From the first time you found yourself in bed with him- sooner than you usually went to bed with a man, but this was Roy after all- he knew exactly how to make you blush and giggle and squirm and fall apart and about a million other little things, cute and dirty alike. The best part was how obvious it was that he enjoyed the reactions he got out of you.

“Yeah.” You could practically hear his smirk through the phone. “I know it’s a Sunday night and you’ve got work tomorrow but…”

“You can come over!” If it was any other guy, you’d be embarrassed by how quickly you invited him into your home and into your bed. But again, it was Roy. Roy Kent, who thought you were the cutest, sweetest, sexiest thing in the world, wanted to see you late at night. There was no universe where you’d deny that request.

“I’ll be there in ten, babe.” And with that, he hung up.

Once you heard the click of the disconnected call, you sprung up out of bed. Thankfully, you’d already groomed, in anticipation of seeing Roy after work tomorrow. But your oversized t-shirt from a girls’ trip to Bath didn’t quite feel sexy enough for your ex-footballer boyfriend. Trying to control your anticipatory blushing, you tiptoed over to your bureau and quickly rifled through it until you pulled out the little nightie you remembered Roy losing his mind over a couple weeks ago. Honestly, you didn’t think it was that sexy- a light blue number that was see-through and form-fitting in all the right places, but nothing you thought of as special. But when Roy took in the sight of you, the adorable teacher with the jean jackets and white sneakers and sweet smiles, wearing something so revealing while inviting him to climb into bed, he had all but ripped the nightie off of you.

You were hoping for the same kind of reaction tonight.

After changing, you did a quick job of prepping for Roy’s arrival- brushing teeth, setting the lights low, double checking that your sheets were presentable. You were just tucking away the last of your folded laundry when your mobile lit up with a text from Roy: Here.

Not caring about looking overenthusiastic, you practically sprinted to the front door. When you jerked it open, there was Roy, in those black workout pants you liked so much, leaning on the doorframe with that casual confidence only a professional athlete could pull off. He gazed at you brazenly, the way an animal looks at its prey. Dark, full of hunger and desire.

Honestly, you could probably orgasm just from that look alone.

Before you could even squeak out a hello, Roy had his arms around you, using his foot to kick your door closed as he pressed you against a wall. In an instant, his mouth was on yours, his tongue begging your lips to part for him. With a deep sigh into his mouth, you deepened the kiss, every part of you fluttering at the taste of Roy Kent.

“Fucking missed you,” he finally mumbled against your lips. His hands began to wander, tugging and fisting at the thin blue material and grabbing at every inch of skin he could find. “Missed you so fucking much.”

“I missed you too,” you gasped as he began to trail kisses down your jaw. “Should we… we…” The feeling of his tongue gliding over your neck had you unable to finish the question.

But Roy knew what you meant; he loved making you, the intelligent, eloquent, well-read teacher with the master’s degree, go all weak and forget how to talk. It was something he tried to do as often as possible.

With a dark chuckle, Roy lifted you and threw you over his shoulder with ease; funny how he seemed to forget about being a self-proclaimed ‘old man’ the moment things got steamy. He carried you to your room, grinning at every giggle that flew out of your mouth. Fuck, he loved that sound. He loved every sound he heard you make: shy giggles when he flirted with you, rants about your work, sighs when you were stressed, soft moans in bed, all of it.

He especially loved the squeal you let out when he dropped you on the bed. You gazed up at him with those wide eyes, the same ones from the day you met, the eyes that made him weak, and offered that sweet smile. What a contrast to the filthy thoughts your boyfriend had been pondering the entire bus ride home. He hovered over you, taking in your wriggling form and contemplating what he wanted first: your lips against his again? Your tits that looked fucking heavenly in this nightie? That gorgeous pussy that he just knew was soaking for him already? Or did he want to let his inner caveman out and just take you already?

“Roy.”

Your little whine got him out of his own head in an instant. He crashed his mouth against yours roughly and let his hands flitter down your body, down your hips, until his fingers found that little damp spot on your panties. He groaned into your mouth and began massaging your pussylips through the material at a gentle pace. In turn, you gasped and bucked your hips up to meet his touch, gripping his biceps tightly.

His pace quickened with every twitch of your body. He brought his lips to your ear, kissing and licking the sensitive skin behind it. When moans started tumbling from your lips, he chuckled. “D’we like that, beautiful?”

“Uh-huh,” you managed in a trembling voice as you began grinding against his hand. “So much, Roy.”

His voice was sinfully dark as he purred, “D’you want something else?”

Suddenly acutely aware of the way his hardness pressed against your body, you immediately reached out to his shirt and helped him tug it over his head. The shirt hadn’t even hit the floor before your hands were on his pants, pulling them and his boxers down in one swift motion. Roy groaned when his erection sprang free and he saw the awed look on your face; at this point, you had seen him naked many, many times, but each time saw you gazing at his cock like it was magic, with your eyes wider than usual and your lips parted in a tiny O as a tiny gasp slipped past them. To be fair, you thought his cock was magic, something you’d shyly admitted to Roy after the first time he fucked you through multiple orgasms. He wondered how many he’d get from you tonight.

“Does someone like what she sees?” he teased, tugging down your panties and refusing to take his eyes off your face.

In response, you simply spread your legs for him, your typically bright eyes dark with desire and never leaving his cock. Spurred on by the obvious effect he had on you, Roy aligned himself with your entrance and groaned your name as he began sinking into you. The familiar burn had your back arching up to him, your hips lifting off the bed to meet the pleasure he provided you. He inched into your soaking cunt, deeper, deeper, not stopping until he hit that sweet little spot that had you mewling his name.

“Fuck,” he hissed as he began thrusting, hitting that spot over and over. “You feel too good. So wet for me. Gonna make me finish way too fast.”

You giggled at his dirty praise and buried your face in his shoulder. “You-you feel good too,” you gasped as you rocked up into him. “Never feels this good alone,” you whined.

His movements stilled. “Alone?” he echoed. Even with your face pressed against his skin, you knew he was smirking. “Does my pretty girl touch herself?”

Roy knew full well that you did. Hell, he even had a dirty phone call with you during another recent away weekend. But he loved hearing his sweet little girlfriend say dirty things.

“Yeah,” you breathed as your walls gripped him. “I did last night,” you admitted, knowing he could feel your blush against his skin. “A-after your match.” A low moan escaped your lips as he slowly resumed thrusting into you. “You-you looked so fucking good coaching, babe. So fucking sexy.”

He twitched inside you at the sound of your swearing. You knew how to swear, you weren’t that innocent, but every time you did, Roy thought he was going to explode. Especially when you swore in this context. There was just something so damn dirty and sexy about it.

“And you couldn’t resist touching yourself?” he cooed, a teasing tint to his voice. Rather than make you feel embarrassed, like most men’s teasing would, Roy’s teasing always spurred you on, encouraging you to keep going, keep turning him on.

“Couldn’t resist,” you repeated, your voice all soft and breathy as you threw your head against your pillow, letting Roy see your flushed face. “Just-just laid on the couch and-” A sob escaped when Roy reached down to gently massage your clit. “Yeah, that.”

Roy’s eyes darkened as he watched you, your own eyes beginning to twist closed at the pleasure he provided you. “Just like that?” He gave a small amount of pressure to the bud, grinning at the way your hips stuttered in response. “And did my girl moan my name?”

You nodded as your mouth began to slack. “Yeah,” you breathed. “Fucking moaned your name when I- fuck- when I finished.”

He gave a deep roll of his hips, stuffing you with his cock. “And how’d that sound?” he begged, his own voice beginning to weaken as your cunt clenched around him. “Bet it sounded fucking gorgeous. Lemme hear it.”

“Roy,” you panted, losing any sense of rhythm as your hips snapped against his. “Oh, fuck, Roy.”

“You got something for me?” he purred as he began pressing sloppy kisses to your collar. “Something nice and wet for me, babe?”

You lost your ability to speak, other than a string of yes and fuck and Roy. All you could think about was the way Roy was fucking you, hard enough that you feared you would break and perfectly enough that you didn’t care if you did. He played with your clit like it was his personal toy, rubbing and flicking it just right each time and adding to the pleasure you could feel in your fingertips and toes. His own breath began to quiver, letting you know that he, too, was close to being undone. But you knew he’d hold back until he’d given you pure bliss.

Wanting nothing more than to feel Roy fill you up, you began thrusting, pushing up against him so hard you knew you’d have bruises in the morning. He knew by your frenzied movements and ragged moans that you were close, so fucking close. So he quickened his fingers on your clit, becoming harsh and mean in his attempt to see you fall apart.

With one more great thrust into you, his name tumbled out of your mouth in an animalistic moan. Your legs wrapped around him, keeping him inside you as your pussy pulsated and tightened around his cock, squeezing and begging for him to finish. He fucked you harder, faster, through your piercing orgasm, determined to stuff his pretty girl full of everything he had.

“Fuck,” he growled as he spilled into you, fucking his cum deep inside your soaking cunt. He didn’t stop, not until he knew every last drop would stay inside your thirsty cunt.

His face dropped onto the pillow beside you as he finally stilled, his cheeks red and his breathing ragged. He tilted his face towards you with an exhausted smile, his eyes filled with affection and what was left of his lust.

“Did I mention I fucking missed you?” he whispered.

“Yeah,” you breathed, kissing the tip of his nose. “You might’ve mentioned it.”

[originalaccountname]

Remember when I made a bunch of bsd characters into Tomodachi Life miis?

Well one month later they've been doing a lot of things: finding best friends, trying to set each other up on dates, getting into fights, asking each other out... and even getting married!

I try to meddle the least amount possible in their social lives, only answering yes or no when they ask for my blessing in asking someone out or trying to set their friends up. I mostly say yes, with very few exceptions. Note that I am only sharing the funniest events.

That being said, here are some highlights of the dumb things they've been doing, featuring some of your favourite guys:

since this game is hetero relationships only, I purposefully made Dazai into a girl so he would have most of the men roster to choose from (something something Dazai's collection of boyfriends). Well, he lost no time setting his sights on his neighbour Kunikida (everyone's laid out by organization affiliation). Kunikida accepted.

Ango had a hard time maintaining friendships at first, getting into fights with them a few days, if not literal hours, after befriending them, and the fight failing to be resolved. One time, after a failed apology, I tried to cheer him up with a mobile, and the game randomly selected these miis to put in the mobile:

Atsushi befriended Akutagawa, and a few days later, decided to confess his feeling to him. Akutagawa said yes.

While at the café with some of his friends, Chuuya confessed to some concerns:

At the hilarious timing of right after chapter 113, with the infamous ADA-ensemble-but-missing-Dazai panel, Dazai and Fukuzawa had a fight, and Fukuzawa did not accept Dazai's apology. This seemed to be the end of their friendship, but Fukuzawa decided he wanted to save their relationship, and went to apologize too:

Then, Dazai and Kunikida had a fight. They managed to make up and keep their relationship going. I didn't take screenshots, but Chuuya mentionned it during Fitzgerald's pity party:

Flash round! Many characters tried to set their friends up on a date, or to confess their feelings, but ended up in failure. Ranpo tried to set up Higuchi and Tsujimura. Ango tried to ask Oda out, but Oda didn't even show up. Gin went for Kunikida even if he was already taken. Tachihara tried to set up Fukuzawa and Hirotsu. Mori tried to set up his two mafia spies. And...

I was peer-pressured (❤) into letting Fukuzawa confess "because Dazai could make 'your mom' jokes to Ranpo then". Mid-confession, someone yells "Not so fast!" from out of frame. The camera turns, and reveal... Ranpo, who also has feelings for Dazai! Who is still, may I remind you, in a relationship with Kunikida!

Love was in the air after that, and Atsushi decided he was ready to ask Akutagawa the big question! He asked him during fireworks.

They had a wonderful wedding with their friends (the game picks their guests based on friendship levels with the bride and groom)

And here they are now, the first married couple of the island!

There's still a bit more that has been going on, but I hit the picture limit and this is already long enough! I also have a bunch of silly isolated events where a mii did or said something funny.

[housethemd]

So inspiration struck today and now I have a fic idea that idk if I should expand on or not.

Basically: House discovers wheelchair basketball.

Remember House was a sporty guy pre-infarction, and I think he would really benefit from a way to play sports again.

I’m imagining House goes to the local YMCA because his current patient was there recently and he brings Wilson along for the trip and when they get there a men’s wheelchair basketball rec team is practicing.

House sees men who clearly have varying levels of mobility all playing together and having fun and he remembers how he felt when he used to play sports.

Wilson sees him staring at the players and even though House plays it off as just wanting to see if anyone was showing any early signs of being ill, Wilson knows better.

Before they leave Wilson manages to sneak away and get information about the team and what days they meet. He waits until the next time he and House are drinking and watching crap TV before he brings it up. He tells House the team is always looking for more players and that they can even loan him a chair for a couple meets until he decides whether he wants to commit and buy his own.

House immediately shuts him down, but the next Thursday evening House doesn’t have a case Wilson gets a call asking if he wants to go the YMCA.

It takes House about half a game to get coordinated, but once he does he loses himself in it. By the time it’s over he’s sweaty and flushed and sore but in the best way. He knows his arms are going to be killing him tomorrow which will make using his cane a pain in the ass but he doesn’t care, because he hasn’t felt this alive since before the infarction.

And Wilson sat by, watching the whole thing. When the game ends and House wheels over Wilson can’t help but smile like an idiot at his friend. The smile on House’s face is one Wilson hasn’t seen in a long time. On the drive home House chatters away happily, not letting Wilson get a word in edgewise but Wilson doesn’t care.

Because this, this is his best friend. He hasn’t seen him in a long time.

[seoksgrl]

rather be dead than cool, 2. : jjk nerd!jungkook x popular!reader college au, dislike to love genderbent she's all that au

tws: rich antics, irene and mina being mean girls, name-calling

m.list prev | next

The address you texted to Jeongguk, after obtaining his mobile number, is in the centre of Gangnam, a street lined with row upon row of stores fit for those who have cash to burn. If you’re going to get Jeon towards your end of the popularity spectrum, it’s imperative that you get him out of whatever baggy, dark outfit he plans to turn up in today. Once the clothes are dealt with, you can work on that shaggy mop of hair before figuring out how to introduce him to your scene. 

That will likely be the easier part - once Jeon is seen with you, campus interest will soar. 

“How are things going?” Irene coos down the phone, an edge to her tone that often came when the two of you would play these kinds of games. Finding ways to one up the other, whether it be over boys or over money. While Irene is the friend you have known the longest, you can’t say she’s the one you trust. Though, your competitive streaks have always run alongside each other, the perfect match. 

You check your appearance in the store window, the first place you’re expecting to visit with Jeongguk. There’s a party this weekend at an old friend’s cabin, and if you’re going to bring Jeongguk, he needs to wear something that will enhance the foundations you managed to spot upon your first meeting. Brushing your hair over your shoulder, you reapply lip balm, using the window as your mirror, “Things are going according to plan. Jeon isn’t anything I can’t handle,”

Irene hums on the other end of the phone, though it’s anything but encouraging, “As long as you don’t plan on throwing in the towel before we’ve even started,”

“Not at all,” You grin at your own reflection, “He’ll be walking into the spring formal with all eyes on him when I’m finished. And I’ll take a ride in the Porsche as a reward,”

You can see it now, Irene’s eyes flashing with annoyance at your confidence. You often wonder if pissing off your best friend should bring you this much joy, but before you can ponder any longer, a familiar dark frame comes into sight down the street, skulking through the people on the sidewalk, and you end the call with Irene as your eyes land on Jeongguk. 

He’s dressed in what appears to be his favourite colour, black, paint-stained jeans and an oversized t-shirt. All that covers him from the unpredictable spring weather is a thin, denim jacket - also paint-stained. You wonder if it’s intentional.

He stops in front of you, large frame so imposing you have to take a small step back, your Gucci boots hardly a match for Jeongguk’s height. Your head tilts, eyes meeting his own weary gaze before you flash him your winning smile. 

“I’m glad you got here in one piece,” You hadn’t asked if Jeongguk drives, but you assume he must, having walked from the direction of the parking lot behind the row of designer stores, “I hope it was easy for you to find,”

He frowns at that, shuffling from foot to foot and adjusting his backpack a couple times. The wind has already managed to wriggle some fly-away hairs loose from whatever excuse for a ponytail he has, the strands falling around his face and brushing his chin. You cannot wait to get a few inches chopped - the length doesn’t bother you, but you can spot the split ends from here, for goodness sake. 

Jeongguk doesn’t reply, and so you press on, still wearing the bright, chirpy grin you save for meeting new people. You always like to make a good first impression, and you remember it being one of the few things your parents instilled in you as a child. Your other habits were picked up from movies, being that you rarely had time to do anything else as a youngster. Father was never home and when mother wasn’t shopping, she was organising charity events for your father and his work colleagues. 

You shake away the oddly sombre memory and continue with the task at hand, leading Jeongguk into the first store - Gucci itself. 

“We’ll start here,” You say, maintaining control as you lead Jeongguk further into the store, towards where the men’s shirts and slacks are kept, “I have an appointment booked for your hair,”

Out of the corner of your eye, you notice Jeongguk reach up and tug at the strands by his chin, brushing them behind his reddened ear. You continue to talk him through the itinerary for the day, though his pleading eyes continue to drill into the side of your head, and you have no choice but to turn, brow quirked, “What’s wrong?”

“I, ah -” He clears his throat, “I can’t afford anything here,”

You wave away Jeongguk’s worries, exhaling a short laugh, “I can take care of it. I have more than enough money, and plenty of good friendships with the staff. You can use my black card,”

“Black card?” He asks, dark brows furrowing, creating a tiny wrinkle between them, “Is that like store credit?”

You exhale again, but this time you’re not laughing. You realise not everyone pays for their tuition into Yonsei, and you’re just now realising perhaps Jeongguk is there on a scholarship. That would mean he’s very talented, something that intrigues you, though you don’t have time to be intrigued by your science experiment. 

“It’s a luxury credit card, Jeon,” You blink, “My family is very wealthy, and like I said,” You flip your hair over your shoulder, “I want to help,”

Not completely the truth, but Jeongguk doesn’t need to know that.

His lips part for a couple moments, before falling shut, and you continue walking with him towards the Oxford shirts. The sales assistant, eager and a little annoying, strolls over, their brows raising a fraction when they spot the tall, out-of-place guy beside you. Their lips part, their welcoming disposition betrayed by the obvious judgement in their gaze before their eyes slide back to you. 

“Miss Y/N, so lovely to have you back,” The young girl says, hands clasp in front of her, bright pink nails start against the black of her uniform as her eyes once more stray to Jeongguk, confusion marring her strictly sunny expression, “How can we help you today?”

You step forward, gesturing at Jeongguk with one hand and sliding a thumb across your phone screen with another. You had spent last night brainstorming the optimum stylistic direction to take with Jeongguk, wanting to enhance what good features he has in order to make his transformation believable. He still has to win Spring King, after all, and to do that, he needs to look and act the part. Turning up in head-to-toe designer the day after wearing his paint stained baggy jeans isn’t gonna work.

“My friend is looking for a few staple capsule pieces to add to his wardrobe,” You say, walking further into the store, followed closely by the assistant, and then Jeongguk who lags behind, looking entirely like a fish out of water, “Nothing too flashy, just several timeless pieces to get him started. He’s new to designer,”

The shop assistant makes a noise as if to say yeah, I can tell and you raise your brows expectantly, watching as she stumbles over her words, rushing towards the back of the store where the men’s shirts are displayed neatly, “O-of course, miss. Absolutely,” 

When you turn, Jeongguk is watching the whole exchange with curiosity and a little disbelief, his brows are drawn together, eyes impossibly brown and impossibly wide. You pause in your step, raising a manicured eyebrow in response, “Do you have something to say?”

“Does everyone always do as you tell them to?”

You smile, “Yes, now come on,” clicking your fingers, you turn and walk to where the assistant is waiting for you, not bothering to turn to check if Jeongguk is following.

He is.

Irene smacks her lips as she reapplies her lipgloss, using the mirrored wall in the new sushi restaurant, Stix, to see her reflection. You watch her fluff up her hair, wiping at the corner of her mouth, and you decide to check over your own appearance. 

As expected, it’s flawless. You always apply a lip tint if you know you’re going to be eating, saving you the time of reapplying. Your mother always told you that was rude, and so the habit has stuck. The urge to make a dig at Irene raises it’s ugly head, but you successfully shut it down. After all, you’d hate to make a fuss, and to embarrass your friend. 

“Have you played with your little lab rat yet?” Irene asks, grinning as she turns away from the mirror, putting her lip gloss back in her purse and pulling out her compact. Her makeup is flawless, but you don’t say anything as she begins to touch up her already perfect skin. 

“I took him shopping a couple days ago,” Mina snickers, and you shrug, continuing, “I didn’t have a lot to work with, new clothes were imperative if I want to recreate his image,”

Irene giggles, “Sounds like you had fun dressing up your little pet project,” 

“It was a means to an end. The shirts were basic, Jeongguk didn’t want to branch out,” In fact, he didn’t take any of your fashion advice beyond pointing out what he would need from around the store. He picked up a few white t-shirts, white button-ups and some black slacks. You had to practically force him to get the shoes you suggested, if only to prevent him from wearing Gucci dress pants with his sneakers. 

You can safely say you’ve never met someone so stubborn. 

“Are you gonna bring him to Jimin’s party on Saturday?” Mina asks, wiggling her brows as if the mere idea is mischievous, “He could be your date,”

Irene let out a yelp of laughter, and Mina joins in, the pair of them cackling like two evil witches. You watch them with a vague sense of annoyance, a familiar flare of stubbornness coming to life in your chest as you remain stone-faced, waiting for their laughter to die down. When it does, it peters out, their eyes shifting between you and each other as the silence grows. 

“Y/N, did you hear Mina’s joke?”

“I did,” You smile, cat-like and confident, “I didn’t get the joke. I mean, Jeongguk’s reputation is about to be improved tenfold. Why not let people think he’s my date?”

Mina gasps and Irene’s plucked brows raise in a look of abject horror, she actually puts a hand on her chest as if she has been scandalised by your question. You can hardly see the problem with it - after all, it was your understanding that in order to ensure you winning the bet, the whole thing would end with you and Jeongguk attending the Spring formal together anyway. It makes sense in your head. 

“Y/N, you can’t be serious,” Irene says, snorting, “bringing that loser to Jimin’s party? You two just broke up, Jimin will think you have gone insane,”

You frown, taking a sip of water, “I’m not sure about that. Nobody knows who Jeongguk is, and once I’ve got him styled appropriately, people will just assume he’s a random hot guy I’ve picked up. If Jimin can be a cliche and score a cheerleader, why not be a little mysterious?”

Irene mutters, "I don't know about 'hot',"

You smile, brittle and a little annoyed, "He will be when I'm finished with him. Have some faith, Irene,"

When you glance at Mina, she seems to be grasping where you’re coming from, but as per usual, Irene doesn’t see your side of things, and she rolls her eyes, returning to her useless endeavour to fix problems that don’t exist with her makeup. You smile blandly at Mina, sipping at your water and scrolling through your socials.

taglist: @kyglover @jk97bam

please let me know if you wish to be added to the taglist!

[alexiaputellasera]

You can find my writings on wattpad.

Rehab Chapter One.

Every professional female athlete knows that sound, the agonising cry from a team mate who is now sprawled across the floor clutching their knee tears streaming down their face. Trainers and physios running from every angle with concern warped on their faces.

July 2022, London England.

The Spanish women's national team are training for the euros to start in just one day when an agonising howl is heard in the penalty area of a shooting drill.

The players look over to see Alexia Putellas their countries hero laying on the floor in floods of tears. Physios immediately surround her calming her down and start what is known as a Lachman test to see the integrity of the anterior cruciate ligament followed by a shake of the head towards the teams national manager.

Team mates have now made their way over to Alexia who is heard telling staff, "I felt it pop, no one touched me I was shooting" her eyes brimmed with tears. She knew, she knew her tournament was over with one day remaining before their journey was to begin.

Staff assisted her up and immediately took her to the medical room, she was closely followed by Mapi her best friend who held her hand whilst they conducted further testing.

Her knee now swollen where the blood has rushed to the joint in a reaction to the injury and now rapidly mobility was getting stiffer by the minute. Crutches were now being passed to her by the medical staff and a van was waiting to collect her to return to the team hotel where she was currently staying.

Alexia was a shell of herself from just hours ago, barely speaking a word. Team mates arriving constantly to just pop in and say hello to let her know they were thinking about her.

Hours later after they got the news her mother and Alba arrived by her side, this is when the Spanish midfielder really broke down. She had just had the season of her life and was determined to win the euros after all the pain and suffering the national team squad had faced this was just another reason she should never of caved and come back to join up with her team. She should have listened to the doubt in her head.

Sleep was difficult she had her knee propped up under some pillows and had yet to hear from her girlfriend who was let know by Mapi what had happened earlier.

3am rolls around and she receives a FaceTime call from her seemingly drunk girlfriend who doesn't even mention the injury just that she wishes she was here to take care of her and that she missed sex. Alexia didn't usually mind these calls but not today she needed her on a less physical level and more of an emotional level. The FaceTime was ended by Alexia after her girlfriend Olga had crashed out on the bed at their home in Barcelona leaving Alexia to hang up feeling worse than she already did.

She had texted her manager Jona declaring she was 'done with football and to buy a new midfielder'. At this moment in time she was done, she didn't want to conquer that steep mountain of rehab and hard work and that same question had repeatedly popped into her head 'why me?'.

Alexia woke with puffy eyes and a ringing head, today was game day and she was going to watch before flying back to Barcelona for the big operation and to start the recovery process.

Grabbing the crutches and already struggling with it she threw her legs over the side of the bed and got up to get ready for the day. A small knock on her door and it opening slowly because heavens forbid they would be allowed to lock their door on international duty  and Mapi appeared with a small pitiful smile on her face.

"Bon dia hermana are you ready for breakfast?".

"Si" was all that came out of Alexias mouth before she moved slowly over to the wardrobe to grab some Spain gear and joined Mapi in the elevator.

Spain would play Finland today in their opening match and were one of the favourites to win the entire tournament, breakfast was full of loud noise everyone ready for the opening game.

Alexia was joined by Jenni and Misa two of her close friends on the team who didn't really know what to say so tried to act as normal as they could but she didn't laugh instead she sat there quietly sipping away at her coffee and barely touching her eggs.

The girls all got on the coach and made their way to the stadium, Alexia sat near the front tears now brimming she could hear everyone getting into game mode and that broke her heart even more. She shoved her AirPods in and listened to some music looking out the window watching them travel through the English city.

Sat pitch side was horrible, the game was frustrating a lot harder than it really should have been, the injury of Alexia seemingly stuck in the other athletes heads. Aitana scored and dedicated her goal to Alexia who loved the sentiment although it made her sadder than she had ever been before.

After the game Alexia went straight to her room not wanting to join in the celebrations for a win she didn't even participate in.

After what felt like an eternity she fell asleep knowing tomorrow she would fly home and start the next processes in her recovery knowing an operation was imminent.

Morning came and went and Alexia said goodbye to all of her team mates, they were sad to see her leave but sadder because of her injury most of them embracing her for longer than normal. The athletes did not want to be left with the Spanish federation without their loyal captain to protect and guide them, she was like their secret manager they mainly listened to what she said and not the idiot that was Jorge Vilda and his stupid arse.

The flight was a mere 2 hours long and Alexia fell asleep in pure exhaustion. She was met by her mother and Alba at the airport who could see their loved one was deeply hurting but hurried her into their car after they saw journalists spot her and would begin to hound her knowing her mental state was vulnerable they got her safely away.

Back at her home Alexia laid on the sofa hands over her face whilst for the first time she truly broke down, her mother held her and Alba whispered positivity into her ear, completely falling on deaf ears.

The front door opened and Olga arrived by Alexias side bringing her into a deep hug "how are we feeling Bebe?".

"Like shit Olga".

Olga screwed her face up at the comment and Alexia immediately apologised "lo siento mi amor I'm just frustrated".

Olga smiled and kissed her forehead, usually Alexia likes this sign of affection but not today, Olga hadn't bothered to contact her this was the first time she had asked her because she was too busy out partying at her club.

The tension in the room was thick, Alexia asked if she would join her at the hospital tomorrow to which Olga declined saying she had an important meeting. Alexia felt her stomach drop, she had deep feelings for this girl it wasn't quite love yet but while Olga loved her in a physical manner it wasn't matched by the level of manner that Alexia distributed towards her, hence the heavy imbalance in the relationship.

"We're coming carino" Eli gestures towards her and Alba. Alexia smiled at the words and flicked the tv on to watch yesterdays match, hell if she couldn't play she sure was going to analyse the shit out of it.

The day went slowly, the anticipation building up for tomorrow and the new fear setting in that she wouldn't be anywhere near as good as before.

Olga had already made dinner plans with her friends so Alexia was left alone for the evening to fight the fight that was now going on in her head. Moving about the apartment was difficult the crutches kept catching on everything and this made Alexia angrier by the second, in the end she resided to her bed defeated and sad about the position she was currently in.

Messages worldwide were now streaming in to support the captain and she had several missed calls from the Barcelona higher ups including her team manager Jona who had assured her everything was going to be fine and that he could never replace her. She snorted at that last comment and slammed her phone down on the side, knowing she was mentally done today she gave up and fell asleep.

Morning came and Alexia was a bundle of nerves, Olgas arms draped over her chest. She didn't even hear the Madrid girl come home last night she must of been exhausted.

Today was the day she would have her left knee operated on, she got up and made herself busy, making coffee and bringing Olga tablets and a fresh bottle of water for what she presumed would be a hangover any minute now.

Sitting at the kitchen counter drinking her coffee Olga emerged from her pit kissing her girlfriend good morning and pouring herself some fresh coffee.

"Good morning Bonita are you ready for today?".

"Si Bebe I'm nervous" Alexia had a tear in her eye but Olga didn't notice she was too busy replying to a text from her friends. "You will be fine Bonita and I'll be here to look after you" she kissed Alexias lips and made her way to the bathroom to shower for her day ahead.

A hard lump in her throat Alexia half knew that Olga wasn't going to be the one she needed to do this recovery process with, leaving Alexia ready to quit the game she loved altogether.

An hour later Alexias mother and sister arrived to take her to the hospital, once there a lot of different people spoke to her she didn't absorb any of that information and luckily her mother was paying attention.

As they prepped her for surgery that's when she became emotional, her mother holding her hand and kissing her, her sister calmly stroking her face but also visibly upset because her sister was hurt. Doctors entered the room all talking in fast Spanish and drawing lines on the areas that surrounded her knee ready for the operation.

As the medication kicked in Alexia started to relax and then everything went black.

As she opened her eyes there was a slight twinge in her left knee, she was still hooked up to the machines. Her mother was asleep holding her hand and Alba was in the corner sat on her phone waiting for the midfielder ti wake up.

"Ale!" Alba squealed coming over to hug her, Eli woke up at this noise and gently kissed her daughters hands receiving a small smile from her eldest daughter.

"How are you feeling?" Eli asked quizzically.

"Okay, but I'm guessing that's the drugs talking" they all laughed at that comment.

"Did it go okay?".

"Si we believe so carino, we will know more in the next few days".

Alexia felt the panic lower from her chest taking in a deep breath, she knew the road to recovery was going to take maybe over a year and that was incredibly daunting for her. Because of the length of time and also because she wasn't sure if it was what she wanted right now, she felt very lost in that moment.

Alexia was a pioneer for women's football and had fought tooth and nail to be the very best in the game and the hard work had come in many trophies and adoring fans recognising her efforts and achievements. Where did she go from here?

Alexia is discharged from hospital and returns home, Olga is now back trying to make small talk but getting nothing in response, Alexia didn't want to talk, talking would not help the situation she was in right now. She was ready to give it all up and disappear away from prying eyes and away from everyone she felt she had let down by sustaining this injury. She looked at her knee in anger the same left leg that had given her the life she had giving out on her before one of the biggest tournaments of her life.

Not giving any kind of response Olga decided she would go out and in such a decline in their relationship would begin. Olga had never been a supportive girlfriend as such she was also headstrong like Alexia and was on her own path. She was rarely at a game due to her own commitments and usually Alexia didn't mind as the sex made up for it. But now as much as she kept pushing Olga away she needed her right now.

A week passed and no one has heard from the Catalan star, Olga hasn't updated anyone probably because she hasn't been around. Alexia choosing to ignore all contact and wallow in self pity over her injury. But the timing of this injury and where she was right now was crucial as she had to began her rehab to progress to the next step but she hadn't she had locked herself away and laid on the couch all week watching crappy television and watching her team lose to Germany much to her annoyance.

At the end of week one she is ready to give it all up her knee was stiff and sore and she was rapidly losing muscle. Olga was almost a figment of her imagination going out for dinner and coming home at all hours of the morning. She had also tried to initiate some physical connection but was rejected by Alexia who felt like a failure at the moment in that department.

Barcelona staff and her mother and sister were worried sick and together they joined and came up with some kind of solution that could possibly pull her out of her slump and put her back on the right path.

It was early Thursday morning when there was a loud knock on Alexias door, Alexia used her crutches to steady herself and made her way over. Opening the door she was met by a face she did not recognise, but this women was wearing a Barcelona muscle top and shorts so she must of been sent by the club.

"Hola Alexia I'm Jay I've been sent by the club to help start processing your rehab".

"No" was all that came out of the captains mouth and she began to close the door before a foot stopped it and Jay slid past her and made her way into her home.

"Wait a minute you can't just..".

"Alexia with all due respect I've been sent by the club and you have a contract to uphold which includes major injuries and rehabilitation".

Alexia was stunned at this women's abruptness, Jay or what she had referred to herself as was quietly looking around the apartment taking it all in. Alexia took the moment to graze her eyes over the women, she was English based on her accent, quite tall about 5 foot 9 Alexia would say, tanned skin with tattoos clearly on show, long blonde hair, very blue eyes and very muscular. If Alexia wasn't so pissed or in the situation she was in she probably would have brought the girl a drink.

"Jay is it? I don't need help.. I'm fine here thank you I'll make contact with the club when you leave" Jay laughed which immediately pissed Alexia off.

"Alexia, the club has been trying to contact you I'm your last resort. But I will take care of all your rehabilitation and nutrition to help you get back to wherever you want to be".

Alexia scoffed and rolled her eyes, Jay caught this immediately "problem?".

"You are my problem now get out of my home" Alexia scolded.

"No" was the answer and a smile appeared before she rudely went and sat in Alexias living room.

Alexia hobbled behind her ready to engage in any kind of war she could but she stumbled bringing Jay immediately to her feet and over to assist Alexia. Jays warm hands came to Alexias waist to stabilise her and for a second their eyes made contact before Alexia came to her senses pushing the Barca staff member off of her.

Sitting down Alexia asked why she had never seen her before at Barca. "I've been brought in just for you, they know you are struggling and I want to help, so let's begin".

The interaction was interrupted by the door opening and closing, Olga appeared and spotted Jay on the sofa but wasn't concerned due to her attire but she didn't take a moment to rake her eyes over the girl.

"Hola" leaning down to shake Jays hand who reciprocated the gesture.

Jay went on to explain why she was there but could tell Olga wasn't really interested making small talk and announced that she would be going out for dinner with her friends causing Alexia to roll her eyes, Jay caught this interaction and could see this relationship wasn't working but it was not her place to overstep.

"Alexia do you have any questions for me?" Jay asks trying to interrupt the tension that has settled amongst her and Olga.

"Nope" Alexia replies bluntly.

"Great here is my number, I will see you tomorrow at 9am. We've got a lot to do" passing over her card which Alexia took sharply huffing in the process.

"Alexia you can call me anytime I live just over there" pointing to an apartment Alexia could see over the street. Alexia nodded and closed the door behind Jay.

Jay immediately went to Eli's house and informed her of her concerns for Alexias wellbeing. Alba arrived and bit her lip when she saw Jay a face Jay grinned at because Alba had a reputation about her. One Jay did not plan on indulging in because she took her job seriously and unbeknown to Alexia she was a huge fan of hers following her journey for years after hers had ended.

Jay left Eli's and went back to her own place looking up at Alexias window as she arrived. Weirdly their apartments were dead opposite each other both having the penthouses but she didn't know that before today otherwise she probably would have made contact sooner.

Alexia made herself some avocados and eggs and settled on her balcony to eat looking across the city she had loved since as long as she could remember a tear fell down her cheek as she couldn't begin to imagine the amount of work she had to do to get back to where she was.

Jay now back at her apartment had plans for the evening, she was off to the club with her friends for a wind down today was exhausting and she just wanted a drink and a dance with a random girl that didn't mean anything at all.

Olga appeared on the balcony kissing Alexia who didn't really kiss her back and told her where she would be. Alexia nodded and Olga left as quickly as she appeared, she was alone again. Alone with her thoughts.

Several drinks in Jay was starting to let loose, she could dance fairly well and had already been grinding with this younger Spanish girl all night. As she approached the bar she was met by a familiar face she had met earlier that day, "Olga what are you doing here?" "Hola Jay I could ask the same thing".

"Just enjoying my night off, how is Alexia?".

"Same as earlier doesn't talk to me doesn't even look at me" this made Jay feel instantly sad, "she has had a major operation Olga she needs stability and support".

"I've tried she doesn't want it, she doesn't even touch me like she used too, we haven't had sex in over a month".

This announcement surprised Jay, Alexia didn't need sex she needed a shoulder to cry on and a motivator to help her get back on her feet.

Jay was joined at the bar by the girl she had been dancing with who whispered in her ear that she wanted to leave. Jay downed her drink said goodbye to Olga and they both jumped in a taxi to her place.

As soon as she shut the apartment door the girl was on her, flicking the lights on so she could see where she was going and what she was doing.

Meanwhile Alexia hadn't moved from the balcony the food she made earlier was stone cold and she herself was getting colder by the minute.

Lights going on at the apartment over the street caught her eyes and she saw two people kissing against a wall. She smirked at the two before realising it was Jays apartment and then she saw Jay lifting a girl up and carrying her to the next room.

Alexia smiled to herself, she couldn't remember the last time she had been treated like that and then she came to a realisation that it was Jay and actually she wasn't fond of her right now.

Throwing the girl down on the bed she made short work of her orgasms letting her know that she had to be out at 8 as she had work. The girl nodded bringing Jay into another kiss as the pair went at it again.

Morning came and Jay said goodbye to the girl who had stayed the night before and made herself some coffee and breakfast.

Eating it on her balcony, she looked across the street to see Alexia slumped under some blankets on her own balcony fast asleep, not in a good position for her knee. She showered and got dressed and made her way over to Alexias knocking on her door loudly knowing she was on the balcony.

Loud bangs on the door were what woke Alexia up, her stiff knee causing her immediate discomfort as she steadied herself to get herself up before looking at her watch and realising it was 9 am and that it was likely Jay. As she walks through her room she's met by Olga who is still fast asleep the clubs stamp still smudged on her hand from the night before.

The door opened gently, "I need to shower and dress" "that's fine I can wait" as she brought Alexia a fresh cappuccino and walked past her with pastries from the local bakery down the street. Alexia guided her to the living room where she would leave Jay while she showered. Thirty minutes later Alexia appeared with dripping wet hair in the living room as Jay was writing notes on her laptop.

As she shuffled closer causing Jay to look up and make eye contact. Again longer than it should be, Jay looked at Alexia studying her features, her hazel eyes looked sad but were beautiful her dripping wet brown hair was slung over her shoulders and her tanned skin was glowing in the light that entered the apartment.

"Shall we begin?".

[tsxkkis]

# nishinoya yuu - nail polish

a/n = not exactly happy with this one, but i feel like it suits noya a lot ^^ also i just installed the my little pony mobile game if u know which one i'm talking abt and it brought sm happiness to me istg T-T

summary = nishinoya is eager for you to paint his nails.

warnings = noya being overly clingy as per usual, also nishinoya being an ipad kid

you could see nishinoya's bright smile the moment you opened the door to your house, his short figure standing on your doorstep with sheer excitement beaming from him.

it was pretty understandable. after all, you were his first girlfriend. he was excited every single time the two of you hung out. and you loved it about him. he was like the sun; bringing the positive energy into your life, the smile on his face brightening up your day every single time.

the boy trapped you in a tight hug, his hands wrapped around your waist as he squeezed you tightly, your hands over his arms. as he loosened the hug, his eyes caught a glimpse of something.

he looked down, focused on your hands, more precisely, your nails.

"ohhh, new nails?" his eyes sparkled, gently grabbing your hands to take a closer look. they weren't anything too special; you decided to try out the new technique you saw on the internet a few days ago, and even though they didn't come out perfectly, you were still satisfied with the results. and nishinoya seemed to be thrilled as well.

"i painted them yesterday." you smiled, taking in nishinoya's enthusiasm. "what do you think?"

he looked up at you, grinning from ear to ear, looking as if he was going to combust from happiness at any given second.

"they're so cool! i can't believe you did that yourself." his words echoed through the hallway, the boy jumping around. as his frame appeared in front of you again, he gently grabbed your face, peppering it with kisses as he spoke. "my girlfriend is so talented."

"you know, i could do your nails if you want to." you giggled at the boy, your cheeks turned a bright shade of pink.

even though you thought one could not be more excited than nishinoya was just a second before, he had managed to prove you wrong.

his eyes widened at your words, the almost exaggerated look of shock on his face making you laugh yet again.

"of course i want to!" his voice was suddenly an octave higher than before, sprinting towards your room as if he was speeding to the barbecue after a tiring volleyball practice.

you followed shortly after him, seeing his body already sat in front of your desk, waiting impatiently. you didn't bother cleaning after doing your nails the day before, so everything was already set up for you. only this time you weren't doing your own nails, you were doing nails of the boy who couldn't sit still for five minutes even if his life depended on it.

this is going to be tough.

"noya, you are aware that there is no chance you're going to sit through all of this." his head turned to you, curiosity painted on his face. "doing all of your nails would probably take over an hour."

"oh." his smile dropped, his eyes locked with yours, mind trying to find a solution for it. an idea quickly popped into his mind, his face lighting up yet again. "you can do only one on each hand, then. ooh, and can you do them in karasuno's official colors?!"

you agreed to his solution, seeing it as the best one in this situation. to your surprise, nishinoya wasn't even moving that much while you painted his nails. he was a little impatient with the uv lamp, of course, but that was inevitable. to calm him down a bit more, you got your ipad out, putting on a tv show so he can focus on something else. it was a bit funny; you had to act like somewhat of a nanny of his. but you secretly enjoyed how much you had to baby him sometimes.

as you turned off the uv lamp, after applying the top coat on nishinoya's nails, you looked at your work with a bright smile, brushing the hair falling on your face behind your ear.

"it's done." your words catch his attention immediately, his head turning from the ipad and towards his hands. you laughed at his reaction, his eyes sparkly and wide as he stared at the nails with his mouth agape. "noya, it's just nail polish.."

"AHHH I LOVE YOU!" the confession sounded more like a scream, his figure throwing himself onto you, almost pushing you off of the chair. "i love you, i love you, i love you. it's amazing."

the familiar feeling of butterflies in your stomach appeared at the sound of his words, a smile on your face as the boy hugged you tightly.

"you're overreacting a bit." you mumbled, trying to get out of noya's grip. he shook his head immediately, moving so that he could look at you now. he had the brightest grin painted on his face, the one you were so familiar with and loved so much.

"nuh uh. i just love you a lot."

taglist: @ox1-lovesick @moonswolfie @wyrcan

[shuttershocky]

Story reasons aside, the best reason why you should still play the original FF7 before Remake is because as soon as you get into any battle that's actually hard you're going to realize 7Remake's combat system fights with itself so much because it's still balanced as a turn-based game, not as an action game.

When you fight enemies that never stop attacking and have unblockable, undodgeable full party hits like Bahamut or Leviathan, if you're playing 7Remake like it's a real time combat game you're going to be unbelievably frustrated. It's going to feel like you're not allowed to play the game.

You /have/ to approach these fights like you're playing a turn-based game. That is, accepting that taking damage is unavoidable, and properly applying a round of buffs to specific party members, assigning them roles, and then swapping between them to juggle the boss' aggro while spending most of your time in the command menu instead of in the real time combat where you're mostly guarding.

Dealing with Leviathan like youre playing an action game is not viable, you're going to get wiped by Tidal Wave and there's nothing you can do except if you manage to stagger them while it's charging up. Instead, you either cast a magnify + manaward on everyone and hope for the best, or cast lifesaver + steelskin with Barret stacked with HP up Materia and then using him to revive the other two party members when they're inevitably killed.

The fight against Bahamut is so oppressive anytime spent in real time combat is actually best spent Guarding, since Bahamut never gives an opportunity for melee fighters to damage him without him sending them flying or stunlocking them. The fight is best handled Guarding with Cloud while AI Barret shoots at him with luck up materia + EKG for constant crits, then using Aerith to keep the party healed up or by casting a strong magic attack to pressure Bahamut to delay Megaflare for up to two "turns". You WILL eat Megaflare eventually and there's no way to outskill / outplay Bahamut wiping your party, only prepare to survive it with the one party member that has a Revival materia (usually Barret again)

If you play the original FF7, you will understand what the game wants from you once you start battling the superbosses. If you don't, you'll end up supremely frustrated at how little control you seem to have in an action combat system UNTIL you start fighting almost entirely through the command menu.

That being said, the Yuffie DLC appeared to recognize this issue, as the Nero bossfight was one you could actually play like an action game, on top of Yuffie generally having a more fluid and mobile fighting style compared to the others. Intergrade also greatly upgraded the Parry materia by letting it animation cancel as well as allowed smooth transitioning from Guard to Parry to Guard. I've got great hopes that Rebirth bases its combat design around the big improvements Yuffie brought with her so it actually does play like an action game even against bosses, rather than forcing you to play it like Classic mode even when you didn't pick Classic mode.

[idrellegames]

As an IF author that does this with a "this is my job" mindset I find it hard to do other things in my day to day because whenever I pick up my phone I feel like I am at work and I feel like I constantly think about my story.

Do you have any tips or advice on how to separate myself from my work and stop thinking about it 24/7?

Thank you!

Having a clear division between work and regular life is really important. I think it can be a little harder to do if developing an IF isn't your full-time gig. If you're working a job or are in school and you're packing IF development on top of it, then it can get really tricky to balance.

I also think that if you're working on a large, long-term project, it's a good and normal part of the writing process to think a lot about your story. Not all writing is done when you are actively writing. Daydreaming about your characters and your story lets you work out different kinks and make new discoveries.

So, you have a couple of choices here. You can reframe IF as your hobby, the thing you do in your free time for fun. Take away the pressure of thinking about it like work. You can pick away at it when the mood strikes, write on your own terms, and if you stop having fun with it, it's okay to slam on the breaks and put it aside until you're ready to come back to it.

But if you want to continue treating it as work or if it is already is your job, then you need to set some boundaries for yourself. This is going to be different for everyone; what works for me might not necessarily work for you. But here are a few things you can try:

Set a schedule. Try to contain the times when you are actively working on your project to within certain regular hours. Set different times for different parts of your job. For example, I only do social media management (tumblr inbox and notifications, Patreon, email, itch etc) during the first couple hours of my morning and then the rest of my work day is for writing and/or coding. I don't get through everything, but it's okay. It's really important for online creators not to fall into the trap of feeling like they have to answer everyone immediately, otherwise you will not get anything done.

If you manage social media for your IF, have separate accounts for your personal stuff and work stuff. I have two tumblr accounts, one that manages this sideblog and the other for personal fandom things. Logging out of my work account and into my personal one means that I'm not seeing notifications from this blog and I'm not tracking Wayfarer stuff. It really helps me keep work as work and downtime as downtime.

Separate your work and downtime spaces. Sometimes it's just as simple as working in one room and relaxing in another. This can be a bit tricky if you only have one device that you work from. I have a PC so I can't move it around, so if I'm using it to game later I try to change up my space (by getting a different chair or changing something else about my set up) so I have some kind of physical difference to trick my brain into going from "work mode" to "relax mode". Sometimes I have to get out of my office entirely in order to get that sense of separation, otherwise I feel like I am constantly at work.

If you're on your phone a lot and you don't really use it to make your IF or have alternatives for writing, get rid of the apps that put you in a work headspace. I got rid of the tumblr mobile app a couple years ago and it was probably the best decision in terms of actually keeping me out of work mode.

Take time off. Give yourself a weekend. Pursue other hobbies, play other games, write things other than your IF. IFs take a very long time to make, you can't go at it 24/7 or you will burn out.