#bio speaks

[shieldhero-brainrot]

AU where Naofumi gets the BioPlant shield and its related shields and starts thinking about that long-dead alchemist and their miracle seed. How he was able to make a better miracle seed within eighteen hours of learning about the problem. Sure, it’s because of the shields he unlocked, but they’re his shields. His to use however he sees fit.

And maybe he sees fit to try his hand at some plant alchemy and mad science of his own.

—

He runs his fingers along the edge of his small shield and ponders.

They’re currently traveling to nowhere in particular, weighed down by extra carriages packed to the brim with miracle fruits and potatoes. By Naofumi’s estimates, it’ll feed Filo for a week. Maybe two.

Raphtalia is in the back of the head carriage, reading up on light magic from a grimoire the witch gave them. She’s read it from cover to cover twice over, but even if she finds magic more intuitive than he does she still needs to work at it. And with her motion sickness being a thing of the past (usually), she’s able to read as they travel.

Which leaves him holding Filo’s reins with a lot of time to think. Normally he’d be thinking about what accessories he can make with what he has, if they’re going to need to stop and forage for stuff to compound with, or even that it’s odd being bored with how wild his life’s gotten.

Today he’s not thinking about any of that. He’s thinking about his new shields. He’d unlocked several back in that famine town and their abilities are useful. Intermediate compounding recipes 2, plant appraisal, and plant reform.

Plant reform. Every time he turns it around in his head he can’t help but think about the implications.

His first instinct on getting the BioPlant Shield was to use it on the BioPlant Seeds he picked up. Because that felt like a good thing to try it on, even if he needed the Mandragora Shield’s plant appraisal skill to really know what he was doing.

But the skill isn’t called BioPlant Seed reform. It’s called plant reform. And the mere thought of being able to control the stats of other plants has entertained him for hours already.

It’d keep Filo from eating them destitute, for one thing. He’s come to care deeply for her but with her appetite she might as well be living on a diet of monster meat and silver coins. If he could get her to eat only miracle food that he can make by dropping a seed into the dirt and covering it up, he’d save hundreds of silver.

And he’d be able to make hundreds of silver too. They wouldn’t need three whole carriages to transport all the produce they could sell, he’d be able to create it on-demand. It’d always be fresh and in-stock.

Why stop at produce, actually? He spends hours a day foraging for stuff to compound with. Being able to grow stuff like aelo in a crate of dirt in the back of the carriage whenever he needs it? Or even just miracle plants that have the same properties and react the same way with other ingredients? Game-changing.

He changes his shield to the BioPlant Shield and looks at its stats again. Its defense isn’t anything impressive on its own, not when compared to his Chimera Viper Shield, but its equip bonus has so much potential.

And having a hook as a skill isn’t too bad either. He doesn’t use the one on his Chimera Viper Shield that often, though, and this one doesn’t seem to come with poison. He’ll have to test it out to see if it’s worth his time.

He takes a hold of the fruit he was going to have for lunch and opens its reform menu. Even when it’s not just the seed, he can edit its stats it seems.

It’s as he reads through the stats again that he thinks about the plant monsters that the alchemist’s version could make. Their attacks couldn’t pierce his defense at all, not with Gurihosato Shield’s equip bonus reducing the damage he takes from plants and his already high defense.

They were wild, uncontrolled, and didn’t have much intelligence. But even still, the lesser plant monsters spawned by the original BioPlant were able to coordinate with each other. Their attacks were varied and could be great against hordes of enemies.

And now he’s thinking about how difficult it’d be to train a plant monster. Giving it too much intelligence would be a disaster, obviously, but not giving it enough would mean it wouldn’t be able to learn or understand him.

Hm. He could always experiment. If he keeps their immunity low then it’d be easy to kill any failures off with herbicides and the boost his shield gives them when he uses them would make quick work of them. It already has.

Four to intelligence, five to mutation, and seven to growth? Somewhat smart but not clever enough to try anything underhanded, enough room to mutate into something more than just a plant, and something that will grow quickly but not too big to handle.

Would it be better to have his experiments grow slowly, though? If he raised them from seedlings would that make it easier to teach even the less intelligent ones their place? Having higher plant appraisal doesn’t mean he actually knows what these values will look like until he tries them, even if he does have a better understanding of what each stat means.

What happens if he drops the stats of an already grown plant monster? Would that be a faster way to deal with them than just dumping herbicide on them?

He could always start off with his more profitable ideas and work his way up to instant armies of loyal plant monsters. His failures will be less destructive and will still teach him things while his successes will make them more income.

He tosses the fruit and activates his shield’s hook. Vines shoot out from his Shield and wrap snugly around the fruit, keeping it still even as Filo pulls the carriage quickly over bumps on the road. With a thought, the fruit gets reeled in and he looks closely at it. Either the vines have a very tight grip or the miracle fruits bruise easily. He’ll have to check with a fresh fruit.

“Here, Filo, have a snack.” He takes hold of the bruised fruit in one hand and tosses it forward.

Filo snaps it up without breaking stride. “So yummy! Thanks, master.”

Yeah, he’ll work on making more edible miracle fruit variants first.

[the-lonelyshepherd]

every day i wake up and realize that like. most people do not know about the ocean sunfish hater/worshipper/apathy accounts. like i keep thinking they’re a huge thing but they’re not…. very sad.

[evilwickedme]

I said I'd never do jumblr content again and yet here I am because this keeps coming up and it's like the only thing I can think about. That said I will not hesitate to turn off reblogs if y'all are horrible in the notes again, and be warned that I will be blocking anybody who supports any of the theories I mention immediately

There is no such thing as a conspiracy theory that isn't antisemitic. There is no such animal

Antisemitic conspiracy theories go back thousands of years. The ones that still have the most hold on culture to this day are the blood libel, and the protocols of the elders of zion

The blood libel was an accusation that would be brought against Jewish populations in Europe often but especially around Passover claiming that we were killing Christian children for ritual purposes, usually to use their blood for baking matza or other nonsense (it is important to me that you know that this is nonsense. It is horrible and damaging but also to the core a ridiculous lie that never at any point made any sense. They just didn't care). Debatably this trope is present in the merchant of Venice. Undebatably Jews were killed because people did and still do sincerely believe this

The protocols of the elders of zion is a fictitious document published in Russia at the very beginning of the 20th century, supposedly detailing the meetings of the Jewish people who secretly run the world. The protocols were almost immediately proven to be a rip off of another document - ah, plagiarism - but that hasn't stopped antisemites from embracing it wholeheartedly (special thanks fuck you to Henry Ford for publishing them in his newspaper, spreading it across the USA). It built on previous antisemitic tropes, from the greedy banker trope (Jews were forced to be money lenders in medieval Europe as it was forbidden in Christianity and Jews weren't allowed to join any guilds, preventing them from making money in any other capacity - the reason why there are so many Jews in Hollywood is identical, but in the early 20th century) to the concept of dual loyalty (i.e. Jewish are loyal to ourselves above all else and cannot be trusted to be loyal to the country where we live, see: modern trope that every Jew is probably loyal to Israel and the subsequent idea that it's okay to ask every single diaspora Jew how they feel about Israel immediately upon meeting them). It's also worth noting that the word cabal, used to denote the shadowy organizations that supposedly control the world, comes from kabbala, which is Jewish mysticism

The idea of lizard people, created by a guy literally named Icke because he is a gross human being, was designed to repackage the antisemitic shadow cabal concept to be supposedly more palatable

Most qanon theories also build on all of this, such as world leaders preying on children (remember pizzagate?)

But more importantly conspiratorial thinking always positions you as the good guy standing against a mysterious "them", an other which is influencing things behind the scenes. The Jew is the ultimate other, and specifically an other that supposedly forms a shadowy world government, controlling everything and yet somehow not managing to get rid of antisemitism (see: protocols of Zion, lizard people, we control Hollywood and the government which is of course conspiring against you). There is no way to decouple the idea of an evil shadowy organization (usually also referred to as a cabal to really hammer it in) from antisemitism and antisemitic tropes

And this means that even supposedly "harmless" conspiracy theories attract antisemites and train people who aren't necessarily rabid antisemites to confirm those kinds of biases. Obviously Qanon and lizard people are antisemitic, but what does the moon landing have to do with Jews? Well, it was Hollywood and the government that faked it, obviously. Hell, even the conspiracy that Taylor Swift is secretly a lesbian and is either still secretly dating or is exes with Karlie Kloss is riddled with antisemitism -

Okay so I need to explain my position on this because I fucking hate this conspiracy theory, and the fact that most people simply won't acknowledge that that's what it is. Firstly, Taylor Swift has stated that she is not gay or considers herself an ally at least three times off the top of my head, and specifically denied that she was dating Karlie Kloss. Secondly, outing people is wrong. Thirdly, the conspiracy theory hinges on the idea that she would be risking her career by coming out, except that she's proven that basically no controversy can come in the way of her career, she's already "come out" as an ally, donated to glaad and the equality act, promoted queer musicians & artists & designers (there was a song in the reputation tour that was dedicated to a gay designer every single night of the tour). So what's stopping her from coming out at this point? Mysterious forces, clearly. The antisemitism in that I've already explained, but also the virulent antisemitism among Kaylor shippers aimed at her husband and at the fact that she converted to Judaism is fucking disgusting

Again: even a supposedly harmless conspiracy theory leads to antisemitism and attracts antisemites

A few years ago I tried to rewatch white collar cause I remembered really enjoying that show as a preteen and after around a season I just couldn't stand it anymore, because all I wanted to do was jump into the universe and yell at Mozzie to shut the fuck up because these conspiracy theories were barely presented as a joke and never challenged even once by any of the characters. When I rewatched that 70s show it also fucking sucked, but at least it wasn't showing up in every single episode. The blacklist focuses entirely on a literal Cabal, that's what they're called

This stuff is so normalized and it's fucking everywhere and it's exhausting. Jews are to this day being murdered over this. I can't change the world by myself, unfortunately, but if you don't have a specific person to blame for your troubles, shut the fuck up. Just shut up. There is no conspiracy against you. Sometimes life just sucks. Or definitely does for the Jews who get shot at over this shit

Again, I'll be blocking anybody who parrots this bullshit in the comments but especially fucking gaylors y'all are one of the main reasons that being a fan of Taylor Swift's music is fucking unbearable. Just accept you can connect to music made by somebody different than yourself it's not that difficult of a concept

[donald-trump-official]

New bio just dropped

[divinebunnii]

I am not going to entertain why you don’t want your age in your bio. That’s your preference. If you want to see my blog, my mature content, and the mature content I reblog, my preference is you have an age or age range publicly visible. It’s that fucking simple. Grow up.

[spacius]

taylor swift bios

i had the time of my life fighting dragons with you

devils roll the dice, angels roll their eyes

and that made me want to d*e

flamingo pink, sunrise boulevard

I might as well be drunk in love

karma is the guy/girl on the screen/chiefs/your team

“what a shame she's fucked in the head," they said

pathological people pleaser

so inviting, I almost jump in

I don't like that falling feels like flying 'til the bone crush

fuck the patriarchy

If it's all in my head, tell me now

I know my love should be celebrated

so long, daisy may

[pasteilian]

Have you ever made Human Mikey? It's fine if you haven't but if you did can you show him to us??

My first design for him was just giving him an Afro but I wanted Afro buns 😈

Raph is like the dad of the brothers since their real dads went missing when they were all very young he discovers the hidden city and starts working for big mama cuz she can pay him enough to take care of his brothers (also she was the only one who would hire a 12 year old 💀💀) also Donnie jumps at the chance to flex that he’s older and Leo can’t stand it

[shieldhero-brainrot]

I just think it’s neat.

[dennisboobs]

2x03 // 2x10 // 12x07 // 15x08 // 16x02

↳ Charlie + father figures

[hawktims]

developing a hyperfixation for pacific rim in 2023 is actually painful bcs 80% of the fandom is dead but also it's been fun being in my own little bubble as i discover all of the content that's been accumulating for the past 10 years

[ace-with--a-mace]

pls tiktok is playing with my feelings wdym jatp is coming back

[natashadewinter]

akechis your asuka

[divinebunnii]

18+ / 21+ is a suggestion, not an age or age range. put your age in your bio or get blocked

[uncharismatic-fauna]

Ok any t*rfs following me have to pay me a $100 subscribers fee. I'm tired of weeding y'all out of my notes every damn day.

[viciouslyrobotic]

Idk where ppl are getting off thinking "zippertits" is feminist praxis cause it's pretty well established that if someone wants to get surgery *for themselves* outside of pressure to conform to patriarchal (unattainable) beauty standards its their body, their choice, and shouldn't be shamed (nor should they be shamed in general regardless).

"Zippertits" How in your head do you have to be to forget breast cancer awareness or were you even in discussions about supporting people who remove their tits or have them removed and get implants later? Were you there for the discussions about how women are shamed for doing ANY alteration to their bodies no matter the reason and that we should support their choice to do so while not conflating personal choice with coercive abuse?

Yeah this particular insult's directed at ppl assumed female at birth (more specifically nonbinary ppl, trans mascs and trans men) and it's so fucking tone deaf? Its giving patriarchy. Its giving "you ruined your natural ~feminine~ body and need shamed for your transgression (which is a decision you made to live and/or to live comfortably)".

[enobariasdistrict2]

random thought but there was once this couple in my junior year biology class who were really sweet towards each other & always laughing with/teasing one another and i honestly couldn't tell if they were a couple or really good best friends (until they confirmed they were a couple later on lmao). and that's honestly the goal for all my fictional ships/hope for my irl serious relationships tbh