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matan4il · 1 month

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sorry if this isn't a good place to ask but you're one of the few blogs on here that has actually done any research at all on the subject and. yknow how the pro-palestine donation posts repeatedly give you the option to buy esims specifically. why is that? I've never seen any other movement where the donation posts had you buy esims for them. what fucking use *are* they? you can't eat them, drink them- you might be able to order food with them if it wasn't for the fucking war.

maybe this is cynicism on my part but i genuinely suspect they're being used by hamas to spread propaganda. why else would they need that many esims? but you definitely know more about this than i do.

Hi lovely, sorry it took me a moment to reply!

I can tell you that even before I got this ask, the eSims campaign struck me as odd and suspicious, based on a few basic things I know, but if I was going to reply to you on this, I needed to do some research about it.

To make this ask reply clear, by "connectivity" I mean the ability to either make phone calls, log onto the internet, or both.

Okay, so why did this campaign make me wonder in the first place? Because while there have been some connectivity problems for Gazans, from what I know, there was only one time when connectivity was down to a degree that would justify a campaign, even then it wasn't completely gone for good, because Israel has worked to restore connectivity to Gazans. But I also wondered whether, if the connectivity is down, an eSim would be the solution? And if it would be, why would there be a need for that many eSims? We're over 5.5 months into this war, that's almost half a year of constantly hearing how Gaza is about to starve, so are eSims really Gazans' biggest problem if they have no food and basic needs? But even if it was enough of a problem to merit a campaign, wouldn't there have been more than enough donations by now to have solved it to a considerable degree? Since connectivity was never fully gone for long, surely there's a limit to how many more eSims they actually need, at least at certain points in time? From my experience with donating to Israelis displaced or affected by Palestinian terrorists (in this war, as well as during previous crises), there does come a time when you hear, "Okay, thank you to everyone donating X, we have enough of that, what we need now is more of Y, we would really appreciate you donating that!" But there has been no moment when we saw the eSims campaign saying, "We've had enough donations of this type, thank you, now please look more into donating X or Y, which Gazans currently need more."

And that led me to another question - if there is a certain scam involved here, what kind? Is it a financial one? Is this just meant to get money from the rest of the world feeling bad for Palestinians, and beyond the financial theft, it's harmless? Or is the money going to Hamas and people affiliated with it, which means it might be financing terrorism and the continuation of killing? Or maybe the scam is in allowing Hamas terrorists connectivity that can't be tracked as easily by Israeli security forces, which are trying to avert terrorist attacks against Israeli civilians?

I am not the biggest expert, so I don't have all the answers, but here's what I have managed to figure out.

So, first of all, connectivity requires physical infrastructure. Israel has been providing that for Gaza for years, in the form of underground cables and cellular antennas positioned on both sides of Israel's border with Gaza (source in Hebrew). The Oct 7 massacre initiated by Hamas and the following war have at times physically damaged this infrastructure, which is why Gaza has had less connectivity than usual (though it's not gone). The one time which was the worst, in terms of connectivity, the internet (but not all connectivity) was down from Friday, until Israel managed to fix things on Sunday (link above is the source for all this, it's an article from Oct 31, 2023. That said, Oct is when the most connectivity issues were reported). That means that Gaza was never fully offline except for that short period of Friday to Sunday. It also means the connectivity issues are not some plot to keep Gazans from telling the world about their plight (the way I've seen the eSims campaign presented on social media), or the connectivity would be totally down, and Israel would not do anything to restore it at any point.

And I'm pointing this out to explain one of two reasons why eSims being bought for Gazans might be useless as a solution to Gaza's connectivity if Israel was actually purposely harming it. (this following part is based on me reading way too many articles about eSim technology, those can be easily found everywhere online)

If the physical infrastructure providing the signal (which mobile networks use to provide connectivity) is physically damaged, eSim technology can't bypass that. Because eSim technology doesn't provide the signal, it just allows the owner of an eSim to easily switch between mobile networks without having to switch physical SIMs provided by these networks. That means, that for the eSim to work, there has to be some connectivity anyway. There also has to be connectivity in the first place in order to activate the eSim program paid for by someone outside Gaza (not to mention, they'd need connectivity to get the code, and learn that they're getting an eSim, and how to activate it). If Israel really was intentionally cutting off Gaza's connectivity by shutting down the physical infrastructure, as it's being presented online, eSims would be completely useless. You wouldn't be able to activate them, and you wouldn't have a signal that allowed you to use them. A campaign that misrepresents the basic facts (as if Israel is intentionally denying Gazans connectivity, or as if eSims can provide connectivity all on their own) is suspect to me.

The other reason why eSims wouldn't be a solution for many (if not most) Gazans, even if you do have connectivity, is that it also requires you to have an eSim compatible smartphone. The 'e' in eSim stands for 'embedded.' That means the technology that allows the use of eSims has to be embedded into the phone you're using, and then you can buy and activate an eSim. If you buy an eSim and wanna use it with a smartphone that doesn't have the required technology embedded, that's a bit like buying a wireless charger to use with an older phone that can only be charged through a cable (it just doesn't have the technology embedded that allows it to connect to and be charged by a wireless charger). The technology allowing the use of eSims has only been embedded in more recent phone models, which Gazans are less likely to have.

Regarding that last point, I wanna explain that, as mentioned in the above Hebrew link, before the war Gaza's mobile networks were all operating on 3G technology, even though most phones now operate on 4G or even 5G technology, which means it wouldn't be worth it for the average Gazan to invest in buying a newer phone, which is presumably more expensive than an older model. Especially if it's one that can't even connect to the older 3G network.

That's not to say there wouldn't be any Gazans with newer phones. The myth spread before the war for years called Gaza a 'concentration camp' or 'open air prison' as if people there have nothing (which makes vids comparing Gaza before and after the war particularly ironic. Either there was nothing before the war, and then the war didn't change much, or Gaza was a beautiful, thriving place before the war, and then calling it a 'concentration camp' was a Holocaust distorting lie). Here's the truth, there were indeed many Gazans who were poor and didn't have that much. But there were also Gazans who were extremely rich, the gap there was one of the biggest in the world. A lot of Israelis are familiar with the Twitter hashtag that documented wealth and luxury in Gaza before the war, TheGazaYouDontSee. It was based on an Arabic speaking Israeli Jewish woman following the social media accounts of actual Gazans, and sharing in English what they would upload, showing stuff like resorts, hotels, luxury cars that most Israelis I know can't afford. You know, typical concentration camp stuff. You'd have to scroll back in the hashtag a bit to find those older tweets from before the war, some have been captured and shared on Tumblr as well.

Where does the gap come from? Not all of it, but a big part is about who is in Hamas (and who isn't), who's affiliated with Hamas (and who's not), who gets some of the donated billions of dollars being poured into Gaza over the years and mostly stolen by Hamas, who gets some of the money coming from Qatar, who gets some of the money coming from Iran, and so on. In other words, the poverty that existed in Gaza before, existed despite how much money was being invested in it for years, and because of Hamas and Hamas-related thieves, making a profit out of it, while keeping sections of the Gazan population poor and without aid.

BTW, if there would have been a permanent ceasefire now, this would just be replicated. The world would donate more money than ever, and Hamas would steal almost all of it, with a big chunk going to the financing of terrorism (building terror tunnels we now know are more extensive than the NYC subway or the London tube, stocking up on rockets, drones, explosives, assault rifles, RPGs and more, which allow Hamas to continue to fight the strongest army in the Middle East and target innocent Israeli civilians for over 5.5 months) and the rest lining up their own pockets, enabling them to lead a VERY nice, comfortable, even luxurious life.

So which Gazans are the most likely to have eSim compatible smartphones? The rich ones, who are in or associated with Hamas.

And that brings me to the question of what's the real purpose of the eSims campaign.

One aspect could be the propaganda value of such a campaign. They're not just repeatedly asking people to donate money for eSims, many posts are asking for it, while insisting on the vilifying lie that Israel is keeping Gaza disconnected on purpose. It's a bit like the boycott campaign. Starbucks is not actually affiliated with Israel or Israeli policy, it doesn't even have any branches in Israel, it tried in the past, but had to close here. So why in the world would it finance anything Israeli? When an Israeli Prime Minister has to decide whether to finish off Hamas, so that hundreds of thousands of Israelis can safely return to their homes in southern Israel, he's not calling a chain of cafes that doesn't even sell anything in this country. The only current sort-of-link to Israel, is that the CEO is Jewish. So if Starbucks is boycotted and takes a financial hit, that has zero influence on Israel or its policies. Why then has Starbucks been targeted? Maybe partly because of the CEO, which is antisemitic. But most likely, it's because Starbucks is an easy to spot brand when pics of celebs are being taken, which allows people to talk about the boycott. And that's the value, it's a PR move, to get it into everyone's head that anyone associated with Israel should be canceled. To repeat it constantly regarding different celebs, until the message gets through, that the biggest monster in this world, and the one state that everyone should be united against, is the Jewish one.

The financial aspect. Again, I'm not a big expert, but I can't really see how, if people are being asked to pay eSim providers directly, this would be done for financial gain. I could be wrong, maybe there is some way to funnel the money to the people in the campaign instead of regular Gazans, but on the surface at least, I'm not sure how (since they're not asking for the receipts, just the activation code). It could still be about financial gain in the sense that the eSims aren't providing connectivity when the physical infrastructure is down, but they mean some Gazans haven't had to pay for their internet for a while. Which ones? Most likely, the ones in or affiliated with Hamas. I personally do not like the idea of terrorists launching a massacre that is the opening shot of a war, relying on all the donations they can steal after the end of the war to make it worth while, and then as a perk getting their internet paid for by strangers.

Then there's the direct value to Hamas, meaning the option that the campaign is meant to directly help Hamas' terrorist activity, or terrorist goals. Meaning, not only are the eSims going to people who are in or have connections to Hamas, the codes are sent to them specifically to aid them with harming Israel.

Why am I considering this option? For one thing, because we know that since the start of the war, Hamas terrorists inside Gaza have been directing terrorist activity outside of it. One example is a Palestinian terrorist squad, which was directed from Gaza, and was thankfully stopped before they managed to carry out the attack they were planning, and here's another similar example, of a terrorist squad made up of 13 Israeli Arabs, and directed from Gaza on how to carry out mass terrorist attacks, stopped thanks to documents the IDF found while operating inside Gaza. An attack that was successfully carried out and was confirmed as directed from Gaza, is the one where terrorists shot to death several people in Jerusalem, during what was supposed to be a truce between Israel and Hamas, during which Israeli hostages would be released (I heard this recently on TV, online I sadly only managed to find a source that these terrorists had a track record of being directed from Gaza). These terrorist directives from Gaza require connectivity, preferably of the type that Israeli security can't track.

And we do know that our forces do track Hamas cellular activity. For example, we've learned that on Oct 6, Israel discovered weird cellular activity in Gaza, where a lot of Hamas terrorists were activating (physical) Israeli SIMs, allowing them to connect to local networks once inside Israel. This led to a discussion of Israeli army seniors in the middle of the night, on whether this is a sign that something's up, but eventually it was concluded that Hamas terrorists have done this before, so the alarm was (unfortunately) not raised, and the massacre wasn't prevented. In other words, it's possible that eSims can help Gazan Hamas terrorists to direct terrorist attacks against Israeli civilians outside Gaza, and it's also possible that, when Hamas is continuously trying to breach the Israeli border, an eSim could help them if they make it into Israel, by not needing to activate an Israeli SIM, detectable by Israeli security. IDK that this is the intent, but for me personally, I would prefer to err on the side of caution, and be sure that I haven't unknowingly donated an eSim, that might have assissted in the murder of an innocent civilian.

I also mentioned directly aiding Hamas' terrorist goals, not just their activity. This terrorist organization dared launch its massacre, despite knowing the Israeli reaction would be fierce (as any country's would be if its citizens would have been so extremely brutalized), because it relied on using regular Gazans as human shields, then showing the world horror pictures, which would get everyone distressed enough, that they would overlook the massacre, and Hamas' vow to repeat it, and focus on demanding an immediate ceasefire, saving Hamas from being destroyed. We know Hamas uses "journalists," and some of these "journalists" are actual terrorists (generally, there's no free press in Gaza thanks to Hamas) and others to broadcast this narrative of horrors (that if successful, would lead to greater horrors). The eSims campaign has mentioned specifically providing connectivity to journalists, which means serving the ability of Hamas to go on inundating the world with images that fit the narrative it needs the world to believe, in order to save itself, and continue carrying out terrorist attacks (or God forbid, massacres).

Here's the relevant citation from the campaign site, which highlights providing Gaza "journalists" with eSims:

I'm not gonna tell anyone what to do with their money, but I'll repeat my personal POV. I do think we're all responsible for the money we donate, and we can't just give it away to causes that will make us feel good about ourselves, without making sure that the money won't end up in the hands of terrorists, and do real harm. The latter is our responsibility, even if we didn't know it will go to terrorists, because we should check and make sure that we know who the money goes to. The first responsibility we all have is, "Do no evil," right? Even the least awful scenario of what might be the driving force behind the campaign, is still one that financially compensates people affiliated with Hamas, and contributes to a false demonization of the Jewish State. But at the end of the day, this is an individual choice, that each person has to make for themselves.

I hope my reply helps! Sorry for the length, and hoping that you are doing well, and taking care of yourself! xoxox

(for all of my updates and ask replies regarding Israel, click here)

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whlfchn · 1 year

Text

first time ~ bang chan

pairing: bang chan x fem!reader

word count: 3.8k

rating: 18+! warnings below cut!

genre: some fluff, smut, soft!dom chan

synopsis: in which a late night visit turns into one of the first of many thrilling nights

notes: finally reposting on my new blog whlfchn!

warnings: smut, some praising, soft dom, riding, sex, breast play

!my content is not suitable for minors! 18+ only! by reading more you consent to being 18+ and to nsfw content and take all responsibility!

you washed the dishes, tidied your apartment, scrolled through your phone, but just couldn't focus. all that could be heard was your thoughts.

as always, chan was running late. you weren't upset he was late but you were worried for him. ever since you knew him he would work to the point of no return. the members would always tell him to go home and not overwork himself, but he was a hard worker. he would stay up all night in the studio. It always worried you, but now that you were dating it worried you even more. he was yours and you were his. you wanted him to take care of himself.

you only started dating a little over two months ago. you knew each other for years, but it was never the right time and you were both extremely shy to tell the other how you felt. it naturally happened after hanging out to get food, late night talks, and you visiting him in the studio often. you both felt safe with each other, always giggling, thinking about each other, eager to learn more, and eager for more than just friendship. you finally told each other how you felt and got together.

you've been together a lot since you started dating, but these past weeks he's been extremely busy and staying at the studio later than he said he would. you were feeling a little lonely. tonight you were supposed to watch some movies, cuddle and order some takeout. however he was running late again which was becoming common. you felt lonely, but more concerned that he was overworking himself.

which is why you decided to call lee know since chan wasn't picking up.

"hey lino, how are you?", you smiled.

"hey y/n? I'm good... what do you want?" he groaned jokingly and giggled while you could hear the faint sound of meows in the background.

"always so nice to me lino," you giggled.

"do you know where chan is? he was in the studio when I last spoke to him and he was supposed to meet me like 30 minutes ago, but he isn't picking up." you frowned and sighed.

"last I saw he was still in his studio working on our new song. we told him to go home with the rest of us, but he insisted on finishing this tonight. I told him if he didn't stop by midnight I would hurt him so I guess it's looking like I'll have to do that tomorrow," he said while thinking of all the ways he could go about this punishment.

"no need no need! I think i'm going to check up on him and bring him some food, since I know for a fact he probably hasn't eaten," you tell him in the hopes chan wont get his butt whooped by lee know tomorrow.

"yahh, don't interrupt my plans, and nope we only had lunch and since he hasn't left yet he definitely hasn't eaten yet. well... get him back to your place or home soon or else I will beat him up tomorrow for working late again," he told you.

with that you quickly said your goodbye and got ready to leave. on the way there you picked up some takeout.

now here you were, outside his studio door, with food in hand. you knocked on the door.

"channie? it's me y/n," you said to no avail when nothing was said in return.

you opened the door slowly peeking your head in and saw him sitting on his chair facing the computer with headphones on. no wonder he couldn't hear you. as you opened the door he sighed heavily and took off his headphone leaning further back in his chair facing away from the door. he still hadn't noticed your presence.

"channie?," you whispered when he finally noticed you and jumped a little.

"you scared me," he said giggling and running his hand over his face to cover the embarrassment.

you put your bags down on the couch and walked over to him. he turned the chair around and opened his legs a little further and grabbed onto your waist while you went to grab his face and lean down to give him a peck on the lips. he smiled tiredly then quickly looked at the time on his watch and brought one hand up to his face sighing.

"baby, i'm so sorry. I didn't realize I was this late," he pouted to you. he looked so cute you couldn't resist, but gave him another peck on the lips.

"it's okay, I was more worried that you were overworking yourself and didn't eat yet. soooooo.... I brought you some food," you told him, freeing yourself from him and grabbing the bag of takeout to put on his desk. the moment he saw it he gave you the cheekiest smile and he showed those dimples you loved so much.

"baby you didn't have to, I was late and lost track of time and you still do this for me, I really don't deserve it," he said pouting those cute lips again.

you giggled and put the food on his table while feeling his eyes roam your body and outfit. you were wearing sweatpants and a tight cropped tank top.

"channie you deserve the best, it's really no problem," you said, turning to the side and smiling at him. he melted at how cute this was and how beautiful you were.

"thankyou baby, but I still have so much I have to finish tonight," he said, sighing. he then proceeded to start grabbing some food and smiling like a little kid who got sweets.

"it's okay, I understand, that's why i'll join you until you finish," you say smiling while grabbing some food then going to sit on the couch.

"baby, i'm probably going to be here for a while, I don't want to make you be here that long all bored and waiting on me," he said while digging into his food.

"it's okay channie, I don't mind and this way I'll know you wont get home too late and overwork yourself," you say smiling at him.

"okay baby, i'll be right here if you need something, you're the best," he says smiling at you then proceeds to turn around in his chair to start working on his computer again while eating.

you continue eating while listening to the music and beats he's doing on the computer. he connected to the speaker so that you were included somehow while he worked. once you were done eating you proceeded to lay down on the couch and relax. after a while you got a little bored and started watching chan work. you couldn't help, but notice how beautiful your boyfriend was no matter what he wore or did. he had on his snug black t-shirt, gray sweatpants, his chain around his neck. you noticed how his shirt accentuated his muscles which led to his bracelet on those veiny hands with the nails painted black. you pictured those veiny hands wrapped around your throat. you quickly shook your head fast to stop thinking about those things. you were slowly getting hornier.

you weren't together that long and chan was busy most nights so you guys haven't gotten that far yet. the most you've done is make out, grind against each other on his lap, and feel each other up. you would have gone farther if changbin didn't get home earlier than he was supposed to that day and walk in on you guys on the couch. It was awkward and embarrassing to say the least. your boyfriend just looked so damn yummy tonight you couldn't help, but think of him that way. you were slowly getting sexually frustrated. you knew he would stare at your ass, get all flirty with you at times, and you might have noticed his pants were left really snug after some hot make out sessions. so you knew he was interested in more too, but you just never found a perfect moment and had the time.

he looked so good tonight and you wanted more than just pecks on the lips. so you decided to sit up from the couch and walk up behind him wrapping your arms around his neck while giving him a couple kisses on the cheek. he hummed and smiled while continuing to work. he didn't tell you anything so you continued. you gave him slower kissing on his cheek and slowly started kissing down to his neck. once you got to his neck his hands halted for a quick second but continued his work. he stayed quiet this time. so you decided to start kissing his neck and lightly sucking on it. doing it just enough, but not too long or hard to leave a mark. that's when he froze.

"baby, what are you doing?," he giggled a bit while biting his bottom lip.

"just showing you how much I missed you," you said before continuing to tease his neck a little more by licking and biting the spots you sucked on. he sucked in a sharp breath and you could swear you heard a small moan.

"baby, I missed you too, but I have work I need to finish," he told you firmly. he might have liked that, but chan has a lot of self control.

"work can wait baby, you need a break, pleaseee" you said, stopping what you were doing and pouting at him cutely. he smiled warmly at your reaction and gave you a peck on the lips. you both smiled fondly at each other. which then turned into another and another peck until you started kissing. It started off slowly. lips matching perfectly to each other. it was as if you melted into the kiss and it quickly got faster and intoxicating. you caught his bottom lip with your teeth giving it a little tug. he started breathing heavily and separated from your lips moving his chair around to face you. he then met your lips again and grabbed your waist. you put your hands on his shoulders and got on the chair to straddle his lap.

you started to swirl your tongue against his and got lost in the sensation. you slowly ran your hands through his hair and pulled on it. he moaned into the kiss and bit your bottom lip. he slowly started running his hands down your waist to your hips. fingers hesitant on grabbing your ass. so you took one hand out of his hair and put it on top of his and brought it to your ass. that gave him the go ahead to squeeze it and give it a little slap which caused you to moan into his mouth. you started to grind your hips against his causing you both to moan. he put both hands on your ass helping you grind harder against him. your head started getting dizzy from the lust. he stopped kissing you and kept his hands on your ass, but took the pressure off a bit.

"baby, mhmm.... maybe we should stop, I really need to work" he grunted out while biting his lips watching you still grind against him.

"do you want to stop?," you said, slowing down your hips a bit watching him for his reaction and response. he bit his lip even harder and closed his eyes looking up and sighed. you could tell he was trying to regain self control.

"things are getting a little... intense to say the least and we are in the studio baby, you don't deserve to be in this little chair," he said licking his lips and looking at you with his eyes slightly hooded.

"as long as i'm with you I could care less where we are, with you anywhere is perfect," you told him, starting to pick the pace back up.

"are you sure you want to continue baby?," he said, slightly gripping your ass more.

"yes baby, work can wait. I want you and I could tell you want me too," you said looking down at his crotch smirking. you could feel his hard length under you between the fabric. making you want him even more. you brought your lips inches apart, lips brushing against each other.

"fuck it," he muttered meeting your lips hungrily and gripping your ass to grind hard against him. you started running your hands from his shoulders to his torso. you teasingly lifted his shirt a bit touching his abs. he shivered from the touch of your cold delicate hands. he took one hand off your ass slowly going from your waist to your boobs and gave you a squeeze before leading up to your throat to hold it on one side while detaching his lips from yours to land on your neck.

he started to suck on your neck while one hand slapped your ass hard making you let out a breathy moan. you were feeling dizzy and wanted some more. you brought your hands down to his hard length and cupped him causing him to nip at your neck. you started to rub your hand up and down teasing him. he was leaving hickeys all over your neck which you were more than okay with, but slightly irritated because you wanted to do the same, but couldn't because his makeup artists would kill him and you. he knew this and was doing it on purpose.

once you started rubbing him faster he stopped sucking your neck.

"hold on to me baby," he whispered to you while holding your thighs. you wrapped your hands around his neck and then he lifted you up from the chair and found your lips again, starting to move towards the couch. he sat down with you on top of him straddling and instantly moved his hands to your ass again. you started to tug at his shirt asking for him to take it off. he let your lips go and took off his shirt throwing it behind the couch.

your lips found each other again and you instantly went to touch his abs and bring your hands up and down feeling him up. he put his hands on your waist slightly tugging at the tank top. you crossed your hands under your shirt and took it off throwing it behind the couch. he looked at your body with such lust, hunger, and hooded eyes. he started to bring his hands to your chest and slowly rubbed your breasts through your red lace bra causing your breath to hitch.

"Is this okay baby?, if you ever want me to stop you tell me and i'll stop right away," he said pausing his movement and looking you in the eyes with such sincerity and care.

"of course baby, I want this, I want you," you said, biting your lip waiting for his response.

"I want you too baby," he rasped while bringing his lips to yours and then slowly trailing kisses down your neck and finally to your chest. he looked up at you while slowly licking your breasts through your bra. it was lace and see through so you were able to feel his warm wet tongue on your now hardened peaks. he brought one hand to rub your other breast before dipping into the bra and flicking your nipple causing you to moan from all these sensations. he switched breasts to give the other one the same attention. he soon brought his hand to your back near the clasp looking up at you for confirmation. you gave him a nod and that gave him the okay to undo your bra and your breasts bounced out of the bra causing him to grunt at the view.

"you're so fucking perfect," he said before latching his mouth onto your nipple. swirling his tongue, sucking, then biting it lightly. you felt your panties start to pool a bit. you couldn't take it anymore.

"baby, I need more. I want to feel you inside me," you murmured. you were normally a fan of more foreplay and oral, but you needed to feel his throbbing length inside of you. this tension has been building up for a long time. he let go of your nipple.

"say please?," he said while holding your chin up with two fingers to look at him. he had this playful look in his eyes. he loved to tease and flirt with you, but seeing you like this drove him mad. he was teasing you, but anything you wanted and asked for he would do in an instant.

"please baby, I can't sit still," you moaned, waiting for his response. he kissed your neck.

"good girl, anything you want," he rasped while bringing his lips to kiss you again before tugging at your waist band and slowly putting his hand further down your pants reaching your aching wet core. you flinched a little at the touch of the exact spot you needed him inside of. he slowly started to tease your folds going up and down, semi entering his fingers then rubbing, teasing, and going slow on your nub. once you moaned louder he stopped his movements.

"you're so wet. that's so fucking hot," he rasped out.

"take your clothes off. right now.," he growled into your ear.

he took his hands out of your panties that were now drenched. you got up from his lap and slowly started pulling your pants down along with your panties. chan did not take his eyes off of you. he was eating you up. this was the first time he saw you completely naked and from this day forward he would worship you and your beautiful body.

"so fucking perfect, i'm the luckiest man," he whispered.

he then took two fingers and motioned for you to start coming closer to him again.

"I want you to take off my clothes, think you can do that for me beautiful?," he said while tracing your bare thighs and teasingly going near your core. he bit your lip and shook your head yes.

"I need you to use your words baby," he demanded sweetly while "accidently" brushing your core. this made you shiver.

"yes-ss," you eagerly said while bringing your hands down his chest to his waist band tugging on it. he lifted his hips to help you take them off. you took his boxers down with his sweatpants. his hard length popped out and slapped against his stomach. it was glistening with pre-cum and was thick and veiny. your mouth got watery thinking about how good he would feel inside of you.

"I want you to show me how much you missed me," he said while grabbing his wallet from his pants on the floor, throwing it next to him and bringing you to sit on his lap. he was referring to the comment you made when you started this.

"but first. are you sure you want to do this? just tell me to stop and I'll stop," he said while caressing your cheek and tracing your lips.

"i'm sure baby," you told him eagerly. he then grabbed his wallet and popped a condom out. he threw the wallet on the floor and put one side in his mouth and opened it with one hand while the other was squeezing your ass. while he was getting the condom out you grabbed his hard length and spread the pre cum up and down his length causing him to grunt and moan. you started jerking him off slowly until he finally started to put the condom on his length. once it was on you found each other's lips and it was the sweetest, and tastiest kiss. tongues slowly swirling.

"are you ready baby?," he said while positioning you both. ready when you are.

"yes baby," you said before finding his lips. he then lowered you down his length, entering you slowly. you both moaned into the kiss. you continued kissing while you adjusted to his length. you dug your nails into his shoulders starting to slowly bounce up and down.

" that's it baby, you're doing such a good job," he grunted while slapping your ass causing you to moan and start going faster. lust started taking over and you were going as fast as you could. all that could be heard in the dark room was moaning and skin on skin. he started to whisper sweet nothings in your ear while filling you up with his length. he felt so filling and so good in you. it was intoxicating. your thighs were starting to get sore from all the bouncing and starting shaking a little, but you couldn't stop, it felt so good. chan sensed this.

"hold on tight baby," he says as he stands up gripping your thighs wrapped around his waist while he's still inside you. bringing his lips to yours while gently slamming your body against a wall and pounding into you.

he was pounding into you so fast and rough you couldn't even think. It felt so good. your nerves were on fire. you started to squeeze on his length causing him to grunt and moan louder and louder as time went on. you could tell he was close with how sloppy it got, but so were you.

he then walked over to the couch with you on top. as you were about to start riding to continue chasing your coming orgasm he lifted his thighs up forcefully causing you to fall on his chest as he brought his hips up and started slamming into you while his hands rested on your back holding you in place. the sensation of your nipples rubbing against his hard chest and his hard and long length slamming into you had your muscles tightening, back arching, and legs trembling. it felt so good and rough. you bit down on his shoulder near his neck to suppress your loud moans causing him to grunt and moan the loudest you've heard him so far. finally your walls fluttered around his length and you came. the sensation of your walls closing around him made chan cum right after you with the sexiest moan escaping his lips.

you put all your weight on him huffing and breathing hard starting to come down from your orgasm. he was also breathing hard and started rubbing small circles on your back. you both met each other's eyes after catching your breath a bit and gave each other a sweet kiss that spoke words about how amazing it was. once you broke the loving kiss you remembered something and checked the time on the clock in the room.

"not to ruin the moment, but it's 12:30 am baby... lee know said you had to leave by 12:00am or else he was going to make you suffer," you told him.

his eyes bulged out of his head and all you could do was giggle at this moment and how far you guys came after all these years.

what you didn't know was this was only the first of many amazing nights together.

disclaimer: my writing is intended for entertainment and does not represent any real person! the names are used for purely fictional purposes!

~ masterlist ~

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theanimeoftheblackbunnymask · 3 months

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Yandere Sabo Alphabet

Author's Note: I've deadass been off the rig for like, half a year. I'm lowkey sorry, at some point I forgot about this blog. My creepypasta blog kind of became my main and I wasn't watching anime fr, but I got back into One Piece and Sabo has stolen my heart-

Warnings: Emotional Abuse, Mental Abuse, Manipulation, Physical Assault, Guilt Tripping, Rape Mentioned, S/A implied, Deception, Mind Games, Sadism Mentioned, Burning, Injuries, Death, Two Faced Behavior, Jealousy, Amnesia Mentioned, and Being Held Captive.

Links: {Masterlist} {Alphabet Used}

Affection: How do they show their love and affection? How intense would it get?

He is very cuddly, I can say that the ASL brothers in general are very touchy people (especially Luffy.)

Since Sabo is often on missions, he doesn't get to see you as much as he'd like to, so when he does see you, he's hugging and kissing you at any chance he can get.

He also loves seeing you in his hat, it's the cutest thing to him.

Blood: How messy are they willing to get when it comes to their darling?

The thing is, Sabo is willing to kill for his darling, but I wouldn't say it's messy. I can definitely see Sabo killing a few people while on missions, so I'd say he's pretty clean with it.

Sabo isn't cruel, so he wouldn't kill them infront of you, but he'll definitely make you know that they're dead, and that it was by his hands.

Cruelty: How would they treat their darling once abducted? Would they mock them?

Sabo is scary. He's charming, kind, and chivalrous to the max. He's pretty much every girls dream guy, and when you met him you probably fell for him hard.

Sabo is deranged and unhinged however, but he can hide it extremely well. Once you two started dating and you already went with him to the revolutionary army, that's when his strange behavior starts to slowly surface.

He'd never hit you on purpose, but sometimes his sadism get in the way. He never makes you aware of his true intentions, sometimes he's completely in love with you and your own little golden retriever, doing everything you say with no question, but sometimes when you two fight, he becomes a completely different person. I can see him sharing Ace's temper (despite him being the calmest and nicest brother)

Darling: Aside from abduction, would they do anything against their darling’s will?

He is so manipulative its not even funny. Sabo loved playing mind games with you, he often tells you that you knew that he was like this, but you went with him anyway, so technically it's your fault your in this situation, which couldn't be further from the truth.

Sometimes he hates seeing you cry, but when you cry wuth rage in your eyes, yelling at him about how much he fucks with your head and how you can't even remember what really happened and instead you remember the false memories he told placed in your head, he can't help but chuckle.

Exposed: How much of their heart do they bare to their darling? How vulnerable are they when it comes to their darling?

I don’t see Sabo being vulnerable with you at first. Most of the time he's vulnerable, it's often with Koala because he trustes that woman with his life, and they're pretty much best friends.

But I'd say the first time you saw him vulnerable was when Ace died. He had so many break downs in front of you and all you could do was try and comfort him the best way you could. Times like those really fuck with your head because Sabo is kind of holding you against your will, mentally and emotionally abusing you, and kind of an manipulative asshole, but the times he's genuinely a sweet guy who just wants to make you happy just pop into your mind and you can't help but hug him and tell him it'll be ok and that it wasn't his fault.

Sabo genuinely wants you to be happy, just his method of doing so is fucked up.

Fight: How would they feel if their darling fought back?

It only adds fuel to the fire. Sabo is pretty patient for the most part and often wants your arguments to be as quick as possible. But, if you keep arguing and yelling at him, his patience runs thin, and that's when you see his Ace like temper.

You two could go at for hours, and he'll eventually just erupt into Flames (literally) and end up hurting you. He'd end up feeling terrible because Sabo never wants to hurt you (Physically of course), so he'd just stare at his arm, surrounded in Flames, before looking at your curled up position in the corner of the room, holding your arm as you cried in pain.

So yeah, try not to fight with him.

Game: Is this a game to them? How much would they enjoy watching their darling try to escape?

If you escape, he's panicked. Losing Ace really fucked him up, so you leaving him is his biggest nightmare. If the world government knows about your existence, either as his S/O, or you were part of the revolutionary army before hand, or you were a pirate or something, that only makes his paranoia worse because you most likely have a bounty on your head.

He'd look for you everywhere, that man wouldn't sleep until he found you.

I feel like Sabo has developed a fear of forgetting, so he probably writes down everything that happens to him or other people in a diary of some sorts. So he'd write about each day he looked for you, doing anything he could if there was a rare chance that he would forget you.

Hell: What would be their darling’s worst experience with them?

The two of you got into a really bad fight. Like, the worst one you two had ever had.

You were sick and tired of Sabo's lies, his manipulative behavior, and just all the bullshit he pulled on you. At first he was dismissing you, telling you that you were making a big deal out of such a small issue, but you kept pressing him and telling him to stop down playing his actions.

Eventually he started arguing back and things got even more heated, and when he got too close, you punched him right in the face. When you realize what you did, you slowly started to back up as Sabo placed his hand on his face in shock. You've never hit him before, ever.

He started at you in silence before slowly making his way towards you.

"I-I’m sorry, I didn't mean to..." You say over as over again as you backed yourself into a corner, your hmeyes tearing up as he got closer.

He'd grab both you wrist in one hand, causing you to yelp in pain as you cried further. He only started at you with cold eyes.

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry... please..." You mumbled, you legs almost giving out as you shoot.

He'd then grab your chin roughly, ans then kiss you. But it wasn't a rough kiss, but a gentle and genuine one. It wasn't like the ones he'd give after not seeing you for weeks on end, but it was different, it was kind. It caught you off guard, why was he so gentle?

But eventually you leaned into it, closing your eyes in the process. He eventually loosened his grip on your wrist, but you didn't feel his hand slowly make it's way to your neck.

"I'm sorry, love..."

Then, his grip tightened as you felt burning sensation on your neck. Before you could scream, Sabo smashed his lips against yours, grabbing the back of your head so you couldn't break away.

Your legs gave out in that moment, and Sabo went down with you. You were practically screaming into his lips, it hurt so fucking bad. So, he shoved his tongue in your mouth as a way to muffle your screams. His hands weren't on fire, but he heated them up so they would burn your neck.

When he pulled his lips back, a long trail of saliva connecting your lips, he quickly covered your mouth as he stared to your pained face.

"I'm sorry," He'd say, wiping the spit away before kissing your tears as you slowly passed out from the pain.

When you wake up in the morning, you don't remember a thing. But when you touch your neck and feel bandages, memories start to flood back to you as you cry into the pillow. Sabo was sent on a mission the same day you woke up, so he was long gone before you woke up. But, he felt fucking awful for what he did.

Ideals: What kind of future do they have in mind for/with their darling?

World government taken down, his book published, and you two living happily together.

Jealousy: Do they get jealous? Do they lash out or find a way to cope?

Sabo gets jealous a lot easier than he would like to admit.

When he's jealous, he gets a lot more touchy and often makes back handed remarks about said person.

Kisses: How do they act around or with their darling?

When Sabo isn't manipulating you or the two of you a arguing, he's a fucking golden retriever boyfriend. Follows you around, is at your beck and call and will do pretty much anything you want, crazy affectionate, and loves to tease you. If it wasn't for his manipulative and abusive behavior, he pretty much acts like a normal boyfriend.

This also plays a key part on why Sabo is so good at manipulating you. The way he treats you the majority of the time, this kind loving boyfriend, makes you fucking think you're crazy. Like, didn't he guilt trip you into sleeping with him last night? But hey, he gave you the best aftercare of you life, and he got you that jacket you kept looking at when the two of you went shopping. So it wasn't that bad, right?

Love letters: How would they go about courting or approaching their darling?

Sabo would pretty much go up to you and just start being his charming self. Sabo is extremelylikeable, and he'll get you to blush and laugh a few times. Eventually, he'll start sending love letter to you if you're a pirate or a normal citizen, but even if your part of the revolutionary army, he'll still send you little love letters.

He'll get you gifts and even offer to pay for your drinks if you two ever went out for a drink.

I'm telling you, if you're his darling, you fell in love with him before he started to abuse you.

Mask: Are their true colors drastically different from the way they act around everyone else?

When he's upset, yes. Sabo can be pretty unhinged when fighting, but that's about it. When the two of you are just living normally, no fighting or anything, he goes back to the Sabo you fell in love with.

Naughty: How would they punish their darling?

Sabo doesn't actively punish his darling. He actually let's you get away with escaping. But, he does get physical when you piss him off, so that's your punishment.

Oppression: How many rights would they take away from their darling?

You can do everything besides escaping, and telling anyone about his abusive behavior. He'd be so fucking pissed if he found out that you told someone.

Patience: How patient are they with their darling?

Very patient. He had to deal with Luffy and Ace growing up. Luffy's energetic, dumb behavior, and Ace's short tempered, rude behavior made him gain a lot of patience, even if he forgot them for many years.

Quit: If their darling dies, leaves, or successfully escapes, would they ever be able to move on?

If you die, its like Ace all over again. He's blaming himself, even if it wasn't his fault.

If you leave and or, escape, he's looking for you. He's not resting until he does.

Regret: Would they ever feel guilty about abducting their darling? Would they ever let their darling go?

He didn't technically abduct you. If you weren't part of the revolutionary army and a civilian, you moved in with him, and when you tried to leave, that's when you realized you were pretty much a hostage.

If you're a pirate, that's when things get complex because if you're not a captain, that's something he'll have to deal with, but if you are a captain, I can't see you just leaving your crew for your boyfriend. So he'll figure something out.

Stigma: What brought about this side of them (childhood, curiosity, etc)?

I feel like a mixture of trauma and the death of Ace.

Tears: How do they feel about seeing their darling scream, cry, and/or isolate themselves?

If you scream/cry, he'll try to comfort you the best he can. He wants to see that smile he loves so much.

If you isolate yourself after he was on a mission for weeks on end, he'll be pretty upset. He'll keep asking you what's wrong, and he won't stop bothering you until you tell him.

Unique: Would they do anything different from the classic yandere?

He's a controlling, manipulative yandere, but the amount of freedom and how you can pretty much get him to do whatever you want is kind of crazy. But he isn't stupid or blind, he'll know when you're taking advantage of him immediately, and that's when he shuts things down.

He's revolutionary afterall, he enjoys freedom, and even though he can't give you 100% freedom, or at least just yet, he'll give you the most he can, but not too much to where you'll leave him.

Vice: What weakness can their darling exploit in order to escape?

His overprotectiveness. He's not only overprotective you, but his friends as well, especially Luffy.

It'd be hard to manipulate this, but if you play your cards right, you might be able to get him wrapped around your finger.

Wit’s end: Would they ever hurt their darling?

Yes, but not purposefully.

Xoanon: How much would they revere or worship their darling? To what length would they go to win their darling over?

He kind of worships you, but also kind of doesn't. It's complicated. But he's willing to go hell and back to keep you safe.

Yearn: How long do they pine after their darling before they snap?

As long as it takes. Sabo is willing to wait a long time for you to love him blindly once again, even if it takes years.

Zenith: Would they ever break their darling?

Yes. It wouldn't be on purpose. It could be a punishment taken too far, or just the mental abuse.

#yandere one piece #one piece x reader #yandere one piece x reader #one piece x you #one piece x y/n #sabo x reader #sabo x you #sabo x y/n #Yandere Sabo #yandere x y/n #yandere x you #yandere x reader #yandere x darling

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mauselet · 5 months

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The Influencer - And All Is Not Fine

This story is for @ask-the-rag-dolly's blog, specifically The Influencer AU. Honestly, loving the blog so much. Huge thanks to Mod Bee for creating it and if you haven't already, go check out her blog.

Big thanks to WanderingDragon and Foolscap Hamato for helping with the fic.

Yes, the story is named after Entropy by Awkward Marina lyrics. Also, the anon/s that speak in orange and red, you got a reference in there cause it felt fitting.

Well, I really hope you enjoy this story!

Story includes: Ragatha X Pomni (but can be taken as platonically), angst, hurt/comfort

TW body horror, possessive behavior, possession, anxiety/panic attack, haphephobia/fear of being touched, questioning sanity, self-neglect

It's been a few weeks since Pomni found out that there were currently hundreds of voices inside Ragatha's head. Wow, and after all this time it didn't sound any less insane. From what Pomni understood, those voices were a virus that had infected the circus and latched onto Ragatha. They couldn't tell Caine about this because he'd likely kill them and Ragatha refused that. For some reason, she wanted to protect them which seemed even crazier than the whole situation. Some of them were friendly, sure, but others…

They attacked Jax, causing him to glitch out. They taunted Ragatha by plaguing her mind with the worst cases imaginable or calling her names or taking her too literally. They spawned that stupid paper shredder!

Oh, how Pomni hated that thing! The next time she sees one, she’ll personally smash it into pieces.

In short, the voices–all of them–stressed Ragatha out. And who could blame her? Sometimes even your own voice in your head can drive you mad. Pomni was actually impressed that the doll hadn’t reached her breaking point yet with these “anons”, as they called themselves, constantly following her.

Of course, it wasn’t all that bad. Sure, they led to Ragatha temporarily losing her arm, but it was also thanks to them that she worked up the courage to speak to Pomni again. The thought of that always brought a smile to the jester’s face.

She was glad she could talk to her. Not only because Ragatha was nice and overall pleasant to be around, but it was also good for the ragdoll; especially now that she avoided the other circus performers to prevent another Jax fiasco or a possible infection.

The redhead’s absence was noticed by the others and to Pomni’s surprise, they were concerned about her. When Pomni first arrived, she was too busy spiraling down her anxiety to see it, but these trapped souls were friends. They cared about one another, even if it’d be in their own strange ways. So Pomni decided to reassure them all with daily reports on how Ragatha was doing.

And that was usually the extent of her interactions with them. Until Caine’s adventures forced her to stick around the whole day. Sometimes she was able to avoid them, however, there were times when she just couldn’t no matter how hard she tried. Unfortunately for her, adventures like these stacked over the course of the last few days, making it basically impossible for Pomni to check on Ragatha.

By the third or fourth day, Pomni was getting anxious. Throughout the adventure, her fingers were constantly convulsing while stuck in an unnatural position, her eyes turned into scribbles and her thoughts were as far away from the game as possible.

Ragatha must’ve been lonely. It’s been days since she’s interacted with anyone. Well…since she’s interacted with someone who meant no harm to her. Hopefully, she was alright…

Pomni suddenly jerked and snapped out of her thoughts as a gloved hand waved in front of her eyes. Her head shot up and she saw Kinger, Zooble and Gangle who announced to her that they found a way to replace her in today’s adventure and that she could go see Ragatha. If she had to be honest, she didn’t even know what the adventure was, but if she really wasn’t needed there…

She gave the three of them a quick smile and dashed to Ragatha’s room as fast as her short legs could carry her. As soon as she arrived and caught her breath, she rang the bell, waiting and…

Waiting.

Pomni felt a pit in her stomach. No, no, no. She shook her head. Everything’s fine, it’s just taking a bit. She rang again.

“R-Ragatha? It’s me, Pomni. A-are you in there?”

But she was still left waiting.

“Ragatha!” she raised her voice, yet still no response.

Oh God, three days… Three whole days with nothing but those voices. That must’ve been a nightmare for the doll and Pomni left her dealing with that alone. She left her again…

“I’m coming in!” she announced and reached for the doorknob. Her body froze as she held it, overwhelmed by worried thoughts, but also by a sense of déjà vu. She chuckled darkly at the memory of desperately wanting to know what was behind a door she shouldn’t go through and then opened.

A wave of relief washed over Pomni as she wasn’t instantly met with a glitching blob with a thousand glowing eyeballs. She walked in and closed the door behind her.

She looked around the room and her heart skipped a beat. Ragatha was there, sitting on her bed, sewing what appeared to be a suit. She was so focused on her work; maybe that's why she didn't register the bell. Pomni can't actually remember if she'd ever seen her this focused, but she looked surprisingly calm and, the jester had to admit, quite pretty.

“Um…Ragatha?” the short woman started, walking over, “I'm sorry for barging in, I was just worried when you didn't answer.” But the ragdoll didn't respond; it was as if she didn’t even notice that Pomni was in the room talking to her.

Was she ignoring her? Was she mad? Did she…hate her? All of those thoughts sounded really ridiculous considering that this was Ragatha we were talking about. She doesn’t even allow herself to hate Jax, someone who’s caused more than enough harm to her, so there is no way she’d ever hate Pomni. Right…? Yet all those thoughts, as unrealistic as they might’ve seemed, felt like real possibilities to Pomni.

Somehow despite Jax putting her worst fear in her room, voices constantly screaming at her and hurting her and Caine forcing her into some of the most dangerous scenarios, not being there for her seemed like the biggest crime of them all.

Well, there was only one way to fix it.

“I’m so sorry I took so long,” Pomni let out, her steps slowing down, “I tried to check on you, but Caine’s adventures-”

“Oh, it’s alright, dear,” hearing that gentle voice, Pomni stopped. It was nice hearing her again, but something felt off. Sure, Ragatha occasionally used pet names like hun or sweetheart or even dear–oh geez, Pomni felt her cheeks heating up just thinking about it—that wasn’t the issue. She sounded more nonchalant than reassuring.

That didn’t matter right now. She wasn’t mad and that brought a smile to Pomni’s face. However, that didn’t last long as the doll finally raised her head.

Pomni’s face turned paler than usual if it was even possible, the pinwheel eyes shrunk, making them nearly invisible and her smile vanished as if it was never there.

Oh %$!#... Oh %$!#! No, no, no, no, no, no, no, NO! This wasn’t… This couldn’t have been real!

She wasn’t just staring at a black void with two colorful eyes where Ragatha’s button was supposed to be. She wasn’t just witnessing her friend slowly abstracting in front of her! She wasn’t… She wasn’t…

This wasn’t real!

It… It was just one of the digital hallucinations that Caine mentioned. Yeah! That’s it! That’s…That’s what it…was…

But those eyes, that void, they were still there, no matter how much Pomni convinced herself about the opposite.

Caine. She had to go get Caine! As Ragatha said once, maybe there was still time to fix this.

“Stay here!” Pomni blurted out, “I’ll be right back!” She quickly turned around and ran to the door. She’s going to come back this time. This time she won’t let Ragatha suffer.

She reached for the doorknob, but before she could grab it, arms wrapped around her and she was pulled back. One of the arms held her abdomen while the other was around her neck, not too tight yet still uncomfortable.

Feeling the fabric arms against her skin made her dizzy and itchy. She could sense every single pixel touching her, causing goosebumps to spread over her body.

“Where are you going, dear~?” she heard a whisper in her ear. It was Ragatha’s gentle, calming voice- No. It sounded different and…wrong. The voice was demanding and rough.

Pomni’s breath hitched. Was really something wrong with Ragatha? Or was her mind just messing with her? Well, the physical contact didn’t exactly help her think clearly as her body was plagued with this disgusting sensation.

“Don’t leave me~” For whatever reason, those words made the black-haired woman sick.

The doll’s embrace tightened. The touch of the fabric felt so venomous and paralyzing. It felt sickening. It felt wrong.

The jester wanted to escape that trap. She needed to escape it, yet no matter how much the voice in her head screamed at her body to move, it wouldn’t budge an inch. She was frozen in such a predicament with nothing but her racing heart, uneven breath, and voice stuck in her throat.

She attempted to take a deep breath, only to leave herself coughing.

“Are you alright, dear?” That voice again. It made shivers run down Pomni’s spine.

She sucked in another breath and let out a very weak and broken “Ragatha”. She repeated this a few times until she made a sensible sentence: “Ragatha… Please, let go…”

“Let go?” the doll wondered innocently, “why would I do that?”

“Please…” the jester mouthed.

“It’s not like I want to hurt you.” The grip tightened even more. “I would never hurt you. I would never-” The taller woman went silent. She felt the pale jester in her arms trembling and her heart dropped.

“Pomni…” Ragatha let out softly and her embrace loosened, “y-you’re shaking…” Rather than talking to Pomni, however, she seemed to have told it to herself. Reminding it to herself as if just physically feeling it wasn't enough to make it sink in.

Even some of the voices were yelling at her to let go while the others objected. Was it the good or bad ones? What even made them good or bad? Were there even any bad voices? Were there even any good voices?

The voices that objected weren’t yelling, but whispering yet they were somehow much louder than the yells.

“Don’t listen to them–” “You can’t let go–” “You can–!” “She’ll find Caine and tell him about us–” “She wouldn’t–” “It’s too great of a risk–!” “If Caine finds out about us, we’ll be–” “What would happen to Rags–?”

“Ragatha, don’t you care about us? Don’t you care about what happens to you?!”

She flinched, instinctively tensing her hold on Pomni. In no way did she help the situation, with the jester’s body convulsing out of control.

“What is it, dolly? Are we too much for you to handle? Are we too loud? Can you even tell the difference between us and your own thoughts? Is there even a difference at this point?”

Oh God, her knees felt weak, her head was spinning, and tears filled her eye. She felt like she was about to collapse at any moment, but there was something forcing her to stand. Something kept her body like this against her will despite her exhaustion.

“Oh, dollface, do you feel the abstraction crawling under your skin? Or well, fabric? Did we do it? Did we f̴i̷n̴a̵l̸l̴y̸ ̶b̷r̸e̶a̵k̷ ̶y̷o̴u̵?̸”

All the voices then started shouting over one another again. Ragatha couldn’t even make out what they were saying as it all blended into an incoherent mess. With so much noise in her head, she wanted to join them. She wanted to scream at the top of her lungs; let out all her frustration not just with the voices, but with her whole body. It would be a beautiful relief, but even that was a luxury. Her body wouldn’t let her. They wouldn’t let her.

She’d swear that in the middle of all the noise she heard things that made her want to throw up. She hoped that it was just her imagination and her brain tried to give those noises some meaning, however… That would mean it was her own thoughts and that creeped her out even more. Strangely, some of those words weren’t anything bad, they were just…words. Yet they all sounded so disgusting. So wrong. Every last one of them.

Every last one…

Every last–

“Please…” One voice silenced all of them despite how weak and broken it was. No… No, it was loud and clear. It was…real.

It hit her like a truck. Everything that just happened in the span of a few minutes. How Pomni walked into the room, apologizing. How terrified the jester was when she saw her. How she stopped her when she tried to leave. How she was holding her this whole time despite the pain she was clearly causing Pomni.

Ragatha jumped back, letting go of the jester, allowing her to collapse to her knees. The small woman was sitting there, swinging back and forth, hyperventilating. She reached her hands to her arms as if to brace herself, but she didn’t touch. Instead, she grabbed her hat and pulled, her eyes shut. The bells one would associate with joy and fun now sounded distorted to both of the performers. The bells were… unnerving.

“Oh my gosh…” Ragatha let out as it all sank in. She covered her mouth and a tear ran down her face as she stared down at the black-haired woman. Her heart was breaking at the sight. “Oh my gosh…”

She did this… No, no, no. The voices did. Right…? She…She wasn’t in control, was she?

“I’m sorry… I’m so sorry,” she mumbled, although, she wasn’t sure if Pomni could even hear her, “I-I lost control of them.” She cried more. “I messed up. Ragatha, you idiot… You %$!# idiot! You scared her. You hurt her! Why would I…? I would never-”

She felt tears rolling down her right cheek too, but that wasn’t possible. She wiped the tears with her hand and when she looked at it, her fingertips were covered by dark liquid.

Her heart stopped, realizing what that was. The dark void was leaking. The voices were right…

The bells on Pomni’s head rang again, causing Ragatha to snap out of those thoughts. There was something more important she had to do than pity herself. Her emotions could wait. Her abstraction could wait! She didn’t matter right now. She didn’t matter at all! Pomni did.

Despite her own breakdown, she rushed over to the jester, kneeling in front of her. She was in tears, barely thinking straight, potentially on the verge of abstracting, but Pomni mattered more.

Ragatha reached her hand towards the pale woman but flinched when she realized it wasn’t the brightest idea considering what caused this in the first place. She instead laid her hands on her own knees so Pomni could see them.

“Hey, Pomni?” she spoke up, her voice trembling. That sure was reassuring…

C’mon, Ragatha! Get a hold of yourself! Pomni needs you! Don’t freak her out.

She took a deep breath and ran her hand through her yarn, brushing it over her right eye to hide it. She curled her hands into fists and calmed her breath before speaking.

“Pomni, hun?” She was doing her best to keep her voice stable this time. “Look at me, please. Hun, look at me.” Pomni cringed, her body still going back and forth. “It’s okay, it’s just me. The real me, I promise,” Ragatha continued, “I just need you to look at me.” The big eyes slowly opened, showing scribbles, and looked up. “That’s it.” Ragatha smiled at her brightly. “Good job, sweetheart. Good job.”

The smaller woman was still trembling, still pulling at her hat, still swinging back and forth, still not controlling her breath.

“Alright, dear-”

Pomni flinched at that, tears streaming down her face as she looked away.

“O-okay! Okay,” Ragatha said in an unintentional panic. She cleared her throat. “I’m sorry, I didn't mean to freak you out. I won't call you that again, I promise. I promise. You’re safe now.”

Still in tears, the jester stopped pulling at her hat, yet the bells kept ringing. Each sob was accompanied by a happy metallic chime as her body jerked. Ragatha had to admit that it made her wails quite adorable and each little jingle seemingly made a voice in her head disappear each time. But she wished more than anything that they'd stop.

“Pomni?” Ragatha knew she had to keep trying. “Hey, Pompom, hun… Can you look at me again?”

The smaller woman didn't seem to listen. She then choked on her sobs as they didn't mix well with her rapid breathing. Seeing this, some of the voices panicked, but Ragatha had to stay calm. She instinctively lifted her hand from her knee, however, thankfully stopped herself from touching Pomni.

“Please?” the ragdoll’s soothing voice asked and Pomni couldn't deny it. The black-haired woman turned to her, scribbles in her bloodshot eyes.

“Good job.” A smile of relief and reassurance formed on Ragatha's face. “Now, honey, you're having another episode, but that's okay. It's okay, I'll help you through it. I’m not going anywhere. We'll get through it together, okay?”

Pomni nodded slowly, choking on her sobs again.

“I need you to breathe with me,” Ragatha told her, “four seconds in, hold and six out. Four, hold, six.” She waited for Pomni to nod again before she took a deep breath that the jester immediately followed, yet struggling. They held their breath, but sniffles broke them. Then they exhaled together.

“Now, let's try again.”

And as Ragatha said, they did. Breathing was much easier for Pomni this time around.

“You're doing great,” the redhead praised her, “are you able to go on your own?” She watched as Pomni nodded and took another deep breath with her eyes shut. “Good, keep going. You’re safe, hun. Focus on me, okay?”

When Pomni opened her eyes again, they were back to their pinwheel look. Ragatha also noticed that she stopped shaking and the swinging slowed down. Her smile widened in relief.

She kept talking to Pomni while the jester calmed her breath. They were like this for a few more minutes until…

“R-Ragatha…?” Pomni finally spoke up and the ragdoll gasped quietly.

“Welcome back, sweetheart,” Ragatha greeted her, “you feeling any better?”

“A little…” Pomni’s voice was still pretty weak, but she had much more to say. She held her hands together, rubbing her thumb with the other. “But I should be the one asking you.”

“What are you talking about?” Ragatha shook her head. “I just helped you through a panic attack-”

“And I’m forever grateful for that,” the jester blurted out, “but, Ragatha… You’re on the verge of abstracting!” They both flinched at the yell and Ragatha covered the black void on her face despite being hidden behind the hair. “And it’s all because of me.” Pomni shifted her eyes away. “Because I left you when you needed me. Again!”

“Pomni, you can’t blame yourself for that. It wasn’t your fault.”

“‘Can’t blame yourself?’ You’re the one to talk,” the pale woman scuffed. She then took a deep breath. “Sorry.”

“No, you have all the right to call me out.”

“Did it happen because of… them?” Pomni glanced at the taller woman, her eyes narrowing at the last word.

“I think so,” Ragatha replied and noticed Pomni inhaling to speak, but she quickly interrupted her, “that’s why you can’t tell Caine.”

“But, Rag-”

“You promised.”

“And you said you wanted this to stop,” Pomni reminded her, raising her voice, “I understand you don’t want them to die, but think about what they’re doing to you. Stress? Mental breakdowns? Abstraction?!” The doll lowered her head in shame. “Rags, you’re suffering and I can’t bear to watch. You care about the people around you and I appreciate that, but for once in this digital life think about yourself first.”

“No need to worry, darling,” Ragatha said calmly, looking up with a bright smile as if the topic was just a casual small talk, “the anons are actually what keeps me from abstracting, otherwise I’d be in the cellar by now.” Pomni cringed at every word due to how cheerfully the doll said them. “We’re also really, really sorry for touching you. We were so afraid of you telling Caine that we had to stop you somehow. Sorry we hurt you.”

Pomni was just staring at her, an unsure expression painted on her face. This all felt wrong and Ragatha’s next words didn’t ease that feeling.

“I’m fine, really. I’m sure that I can join in on the adventures again soon.”

No, that wasn’t right. She just said she’s afraid of Caine finding out, why does she suddenly want to take part in his adventures? And that wasn’t the only thing off.

“What happened to staying in your room to prevent infecting people with the virus?” Pomni wondered, “don’t get me wrong, the others would be happy to see you and they’re definitely worried about you. Heck, Zooble, Gangle and Kinger helped me get out of an adventure to check up on you; it’s just…”

“You’ve been spending so much time with me and you’re not influenced,” Ragatha pointed out.

Well, Pomni couldn’t argue with that. There were still many other issues with this seemingly spontaneous idea, but the more she thought about them the less sense her reasoning as to why they were even issues made. It was as if her mind was getting blurrier the more she tried to use her brain. She must’ve been tired from her previous meltdown.

“I guess you have a point.” She let out a sigh and smiled at the woman softly, but then… Did Ragatha have that wide grin on her face before? That didn’t matter right now; she needed some rest.

“Look, I know I haven’t been here in a while, but I should really go into my room and take a nap,” she explained.

“Oh, no worries, d̶e̶a̸r̴,” Ragatha replied, “have a nice sleep.”

“I’ll try. Thanks.” Pomni stood up and headed to the door. She grabbed the doorknob and turned back. “And I mean it, try thinking about yourself. It isn’t hard to care about you; me and at least three other people can agree on that.” Her smile widened as she opened the door. “And Ragatha? …I… Thank you for helping me through the attack, I really appreciate it. You’re a great friend.”

She then closed the door and stayed in the room.

She originally planned on finding Caine the moment she was outside. She was well aware that Ragatha didn't want that, however, Pomni was willing to do anything to help her stop hurting. She didn't care if Ragatha hated her for it–she was sure she would–she just wanted her friend to be safe.

But as much as she wanted that, she couldn't bring her body to go through with it. It was as if it didn't obey her.

“Don't leave me,” she remembered the doll's words. No, it wasn't a memory; it felt like someone just whispered in her ear.

That's crazy. It was just her imagination. Nothing else.

“Pomni, please. Don't leave,” Ragatha's voice begged her. It sounded so real. But there was no way Ragatha's whispers could reach her, right?

The more she thought about it, the more her mind was filled with white noise, static. And the longer that went on, the more that noise made sense to her as if it spoke to her.

“I'm scared,” one noise was much louder. Ragatha's voice.

Pomni's not leaving her again.

She let go of the doorknob and turned around to see the ragdoll still sitting on her knees, showing Pomni her back.

“Actually, can I stay here?” the jester asked, “I don't want you to be alone and…I'd also feel more comfortable with some company.”

“Why of course,” the doll replied, the huge grin remaining on her face. She got up and headed over to her bed. Reaching into her hair, she pulled out her bow and used it to tie her hair up in a ponytail.

“You can take a nap in my bed,” she said.

“Oh.” Pomni blushed a little, not only at the offer but also due to the redhead’s sudden hairdo change. Whatever it was, it had some strong influence on Pomni. "Thanks."

Once at her bed, Ragatha picked up the suit she was working on when Pomni first walked in. It was nearly done. It truly was clothing worthy of someone as powerful as her; someone with influence stronger than the ringmaster himself.

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heartsforsserafim · 7 months

Note

First of all, your blog is amazing.

Second can I request a GP Siyeon X GP Minji X pillow Princess reader.

Subby reader wanting them to take care of her neediness.

Reader is also shy to ask for what she wants especially when she wants them to go faster. So Minji and Siyeon have ask them?

Nectar

pairing ; siyeon x minji x fem!reader

genre ; smut/fluff

tw ; gp!siyeon, gp!minji, unprotected sex, creampie, dom!siyeon, dom!minji, pillow princess!reader, somewhat shy/subby reader, oral (r receiving), threesome (kind of?), soft sex/rough sex

You always loved being in a relationship where both of your partners are dominant. Siyeon was way more than minji was but it of course worked out for you, they were definitely caring.

They knew when it was an even day, or which days worked best within their schedules. Today was an even day but they both were at work, and there was nothing to help you do with the heat between your legs.

Minji decided to text you since she knew today was the day, just checking in. You lied and said you were fine but in reality all you could think about is the girls fucking you dumb.

Minji ended the conversation with i love you, and you did as well. Siyeon texted you as well, checking in. The same process as minji's, god just texting them made you so wet.

You knew it'd be a long day before they're home, so you tried to distract yourself from it. Playing games, to watching tv, doing the laundry, changing all the bed sheet sets. Just everything that came to mind, you even started looking for a new aesthetic of clothing. Nothing worked all you could think of is your two girlfriends dicking you down and god did you just want that.

(...)

The two girls arrived home, around the same time. You were watching tv, not really paying attention since your brain wouldn't even let you think.

"Hey baby" minji said and kissed your forehead before walking down the hallway, to the bathroom you supposed. "Hi honey" siyeon said as well, kissing your cheek before going to the bedroom you guessed. Once again you sat here, needy too scared to voice any of your wants or needs.

Since the girls KNEW it was an even day, they wanted to go by whatever you asked for and well since you never asked for the sex they just assumed that you didn't want to do it anymore.

Therefore it was fine, after minji showered she ordered take out, and walked out of the bathroom in just her boxer shorts. Walking into the living room to ask you something, she saw you were decently dazed out.

"Hey babe?" minji walked closer to you, her eyes were filled with worry. "Are you okay?" she shook you a bit. "O-oh yeah i'm fine" you say, she looks at you. Direct eye contact, "I know what today is and are you sure you don't want to?"

You knew she'd ask all night since even days you'd never miss a beat about mentioning it to them. Sitting there in silence, before officially saying "I uh.. i-" you tried to speak but you couldn't say it. Your head fell down and your face was red.

Minji knew what you wanted but she wanted you to say it, siyeon soon walked into the living room dressed in grey sweats and a white tshirt. God did she look so attractive, the way her bulge rested in the pants too. God did you want them to ruin you, but you just couldn't say it.

(...)

Time passed and the girls were now sitting on the floor while you sat on the couch, minji had a thought and decided to tell siyeon. She agreed to it and began removing her clothes, only leaving herself in her boxers just like minji was. "U-uhm what are you two doing?" you asked, taking your attention away from the movie. "Nothing, don't worry my love" siyeon said, standing up and sitting next to you.

Minji followed the older girl, sitting on the other side of you. Siyeon whispered into your ear, "You know, me and minji would love some dessert" your face went red, knowing what she was referring to. "We would love to lick it all up my love" minji said in your other ear.

By this point you really had no more self respect, you sat back and told the girls you wanted it. They wasted no time in removing your pants and panties. Seeing how soaked you were made their cocks throb. Minji placed one digit onto your clit, and rubbed slow circles. Watching as your body responds to her movements.

Siyeon watched the girl while she removed her boxers, her cock standing tall along her abdomen. You were whimpering minji's name and god did those two love hearing it. Siyeon walked over and leaned down, marking your chest with her hickeys and love bites. Minji sped up a bit, you began moaning louder.

Those two were in complete ecstasy, switching positions. Minji was marking you up, while siyeon began lining herself up with your entrance. She slowly entered, "A-ah~ M-mmph~" you moaned. Minji found your sweet spot and you swore you could've came right there. Siyeon began pumping slowly, her thrusts deep and shallow.

Minji stopped kissing you for a bit, and played with your breast, her other hand going into her boxers to pump her long veiny cock. Seeing you and siyeon fuck was enough to make the girl cum so early, she had barely touched herself. Siyeon was going too slow for your liking and seeing minji cum made you so much more needy.

"F-faster.." you whispered, only minji heard you. Siyeon stopped her movements, wondered if you said the safe word or if you asked for more. Awaiting your reply, she stayed inside of you, not moving. You moved your hips a bit, moaning at the feeling. Then siyeon knew what you wanted. She grabbed your hips, and began fucking you faster.

You were a complete mess under her, the way her cock touched every single part of your cunt made you go crazy. Minji was still marking you, and soon began to give attention to your breasts. Cupping them and massaging them, occasionally licking them a bit. The two girls giving you this much pleasure, you felt so close to your orgasm.

You got louder and that's how they knew, you felt your high so close and then, siyeon pulled out. You whined due to the emptiness and how they were edging you, but minji filled you up so fast and began thrusting. She normally would've let you adjust but tonight they want you to get what you were asking for.

Minji grabbed your waist, holding it for dear life as she destroyed your cunt. Your orgasm was building up again, your walls tightening around her so well, she slid in and out faster and faster. Soon you came, and she came as well. Filling you up into your womb, she stayed inside for a bit before pulling out. Her load leaking out from your cunt, that scene drove siyeon over the edge she came onto your stomach.

(...)

Panting minji laid on the floor, her cock softening. She looked over to you and siyeon and chuckled a bit. "Guess we still ended an even day well" you two laughed along with her

#kpop #girl group smut #kpop smut #dreamcatcher #dreamcatcher smut #newjeans #newjeans smut #lee siyeon #siyeon #kim minji #minji

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brandnewhuman · 1 year

Note

Ghost and König s/o headcanons pleaseee, thank you!

Dutiful lovers

♡ headcanons ♡

☆starring☆

König Dominik (cause at this point I will not stop calling him that)

Simon "ghost" Riley

Tw: mentions of Simon's past, mentions of anxiety, canon violence and talks of very inaccurate military stuff, mature language, mentions of insecurities about weight, height ecc

A/N: to think this was a very well respected slasher blog and now look at us, letting this army himbos ruin our taste. Thank you so muuuuuch for the request, I LOVE GETTING REQUEST FOR OTHER THINGS BESIDE SLASHERS CAUSE SOMETIMES I DONT REALLY FEEL LIKE WRITING FOR JUST ONE THING OR ANOTHER. Anywho I hope you enjoy it

》♡♡♡《

Simon:

This man has never felt genuine and pure love in years

I feel like if you have enough patience you could make it work with him

It took him so much time to come to terms with his feelings

He did little things tho that made you realised he cared

What made him fall for you was how resilient and kind you were

A little treat for you since you have been very good simps, just for funsies we're gonna pretend you already knew about some of the more questionable things he has done

Not his past, I mean the things that he feels bad about

You knew and you saw how he always seemed kind of scare of himself

And you always were there to remind him he was a good person

He started to do more for you in general cause he wanted to feel worthy of your kindness

He genuinely folds every time you just as much as smile at him

He knew he was deep in love when he started to have nightmares about losing you

He will try to, unconsciously, self sabotage the relationship at first

I feel like he has a history of people giving up on him because of how his past affects him and how hard it is for him to live a normal life

He's not like that great with physical affection

Not because he doesn't like it but because he doesn't knows much about it

Definitely enjoys being cuddle and being the little spoon but also likes to be able to be the big spoon too

Listen this man has been burned, shot, buried ecc he has a shit ton of scars and is very self conscious about them

Not only because of how they look but because they remind him of really fucked up stuff

So maybe at first he won't be that open about you touching him in certain points of his body but after a while it will start to make him feel much better

He swears your touch is full of literal magic

Would love to be able to cook for you but he is a public danger with those cooking skills

Can't fucking handle seeing you crying, he shuts down completely

Which makes him feel like shit because he can see how you feel let down by him not comforting you

You will literally gain scary dog rights for being with him. He death glares anything and anyone he deems bad or threatening to you

Ironically I don't think he's the possessive and jealous type

He doesn't gets jealous but he gets insecure because he always thinks about how he is "broken" and "a lot" to put up with and he kind of feels bad to drag you with him and his problems

Doesn't asks for it but needs a lot of reassuring words

He literally melts inside everytime you remind him you truly love him, that you're not getting tired of him, that you care about how he feels

He may not be one for really big demonstrations of love but he always remembers the little details

He remembers your favourite flower, he knows how you like your coffee or tea and if you don't like either he remembers your favourite drink

He knows your favourite book, movie and song

If you really pay attention he's quite romantic and attentive towards you

The good days with him are really fucking good but the bad ones are way over being just bad

He can be quite insensitive with how you feel, not because he doesn't cares tho

He never causes you harm on purpose is just that he gets really scared of getting attached

Definitely the type of person that gives you anything you say you like

You could be just complimenting a shirt of his but he just immediately gives it to you

He definitely compensates his bad traits with gifts

Weirdly enough loves to hold hands and to play with your fingers

And he loves the feeling of your hands caressing his face

If you wear any makeup he takes it off of you and would love for you to the same to him

When he's on a particularly rough mission the first thing he thinks of is you and most of the time that's what quite literally makes him survive

If you're not part of the 141 or the army in general he tries to keep you as far as possible from that part of his life

He has literal nightmares about you getting hurt because of his job

He loves to do normal everyday things with you cause it makes him feel he finally has some sort of normal and healthy life

Doesn't know how to sing but likes to sing along songs with you just because you make it look like fun

With time I genuinely think he would be more openly affectionate with you

Would tell you about his past on accident

Maybe you two were arguing about him being distant or careless when it comes to keep himself safe

One thing led to another and he said he was scared of you because he didn't want to be like his father and you told him he wasn't

Which led him to rant about how many similarities there are while unconsciously telling you about his trauma

Tbh after that things went definitely better

He feels genuinely happy only when he's with you

Loves going on car dates cause he likes to drive and talk with you about anything and everything

He could literally spend hours listening to you and looking at you with that lovestruck puppy dog eyes gaze

Sometimes he looks at you while sleeping and gets somewhere between being happy and sad

Cause he loves you literally so much it hurts and he doesn't always know how to show it to you so it just stays inside him and it aches

Doesn't want photos of you on him but always carries something like a bracelet or a necklace that doesn't have any meaning to you but it does remind him of you

He has pretty severe panic attacks and night terrors and before you he used to spend days alone in his room scared af and on the edge until he didn't force himself to shut it all down

Now he trust you won't leave him and feels so much safer and so much better knowing that you're there with him

Like I said, with time he gets so much better at doing stuff for you

He always leaves you handwritten notes (his handwriting is horrible) if he wakes up before you

Always makes sure that if you're sick or don't feel too well or if in general something hurts you get checked and get the best treatment

He's a very selfless person in that sense, he would do anything for you

If you're having like major life issues or something really big he will take a time off from work to be with you

He did it for his family and he will do it for you too

Always the first to apologise

Weirdly enough I think he likes going out and doing stuff outside with you

He especially likes to go movie hunting and has so many underground titles that are very good which he always get so excited to watch with you

König:

This man is so fucking perfect it's ridiculous

He has the looks like could kill you but it's actually a cinnamon roll kind of vibe

He was absolutely terrified of being in a relationship

He tends to put up this premade personality and has always been scared of being himself because everyone he has ever met has always told him his too much

Much like ghost no one has ever stick with him

Saying him or his problems are too much

Once you show him an ounce of love he is sold bro

This man will be yours forever and falls hard in love so don't think he will be playing around

You're the only one who gets to see the real könig and is something truly amazing

He's incredibly smart and loves to tell you cool facts about the things you like

He will quite literally fuel any obsession you may have

Makes you meet his grandma cause she's a really important part of his life and he trust you enough

He gets self conscious about his body and his appearance but would never doubt you when you say you like him and you find him beautiful

He tells you quite often how he only feels special or handsome with you and you may not get how important that is for him

He never feels like that with anyone, not even his grandma

He always feels like he takes too much space, like he's too loud or too soft

But with you he really feels like nothing can get to him

Loves to cook for you and knows every recipe that you like

He's always so proud of everything you do and brags about you with everyone and anyone

He tends to have panic attacks and mental breakdowns very easily and everytime it happens he goes to you cause he knows he can be vulnerable around you

Enjoys staying at home dates rather than going out

He loves to have book dates, as he calls them, where both of you pick a book for each other to read and comment about it

Takes very seriously any problem or difficulty you may have

He hardly needs to apologise cause he always likes to talk through things instead of just arguing

You could literally give your entire heart to this man and I can guarantee you'll never regret it

Always makes breakfast for both and if he's at home after a long mission he brings yours to bed so you can have a lazy morning

He loves to dance with you while doing house chores and definitely plays piano for you

Naps with you everywhere at any time of the day, he literally uses you as his own personal Teddy bear

He gives me gomez addams in love vibes guys

He literally can and will rip the head off of anyone who dares to say something mean to you

You're gonna have to defend him tho cause he's not doing that shit for himself

If he gets sick, he tries to bother you as little as possible and even if it breaks his heart he keeps away from you so you don't get sick too

Doesn't do the same when you're sick tho

If you're sick he will spend every minute of the day doting over you

100% celebrates anniversaries, valentines days and your birthdays as if they were world known holidays

Unfortunately I do think he would be the jealous type

Specially if you're part of the 141

If he sees you talking with ghost or hanging out with soap he will get a sickening feeling of dread in his guts

He just thinks about all the things they have that he doesn't and how much more attractive or even easier to be are the others in confront

Needs a lot of reassurance for sure

Overall he's like so sweet and so caring that it makes you feel like he has got out of some kind of disney movie

He definitely didn't asked you out but spent months staring at you with that lovestruck look

He followed your every word like a lost puppy

Never expected for you to like him, he come to terms with the fact that you might never like him like he did

Like fr guys he was happy to just be around you

#simon ghost riley cod #codmw2 #ghost cod #cod mw2 #cod #simon ghost riley headcanons #simon ghost riley #simon ghost riley x reader #simon riley x reader #simon riley #könig cod headcanons #könig #könig cod #könig cod mw2 #könig x reader #könig mw2 #call of duty mw2 #call of duty modern warfare 2 #call of duty

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whiskersz · 2 months

Note

Hello, 👻 anon here! Saw that you're accepting three requests for Adam and well, he's one of my favorites so here I am!

I actually requested this on another blog a while ago, but I'm curious about your take on it. So, would you be willing to write platonic headcannons or ficlet (up to you) for Adam with a gender neutral teenage angel reader? Like the reader died as a teenager and somehow and for some reason Adam took them under his wing. And after a while, the reader starts to see Adam as a father figure and one time the reader accidentally calls Adam 'Dad' but they are very embarrassed about it.

Hope this makes sense, but if it's too specific for you, feel free to decline!

Hope you're doing well!

👻

Hey Ghost! This is such a sweet request, especially for Adam, since he doesn’t exactly have a heart of gold. Reader must have done something really special for him to take them under his wing.

Anyways, here is my interpretation; I ended up basically making up a short story lol, got really into it...hopefully you enjoy!!

Platonic Father Figure Adam x Reader

It took you a while to get used to residing in Heaven, that’s for sure; despite getting the warmest of welcomes from both Saint Peter and the other Angels who would later become your friends, you still found it hard to settle in.

That is until you met Adam.

Adam is very well known both for being the very first man ever created and also the first human soul to ever enter Heaven, and for his notable personality. He’s egotistical, cruel and an overall depraved soul, making you wonder what it really took for a deceased human to end up in Heaven. But let’s not dwell on that too much.

You and Adam met through the concerts of his band; not that he’s the most famous guitar player in Heaven, his band is rather small actually, but you actually have to thank that for getting you multiple meetings with him and the rest of the group. You kind of see them as a family at this point, Adam included.

You actually end up helping them sometimes, with either the lyrics of their songs or the sonority of their music in general. Everyone appreciates you a lot, although every time you express a negative opinion on how Adam’s bit sounds he’s not afraid of basically telling you off. He secretly values your opinion a lot though, and in his free time, when he’s not busy practicing with the rest of the band or taking care of Extermination matters, he revises on his own on whatever piece sounded off to you.

Either way, Adam ends up becoming pretty protective of you; he even warns his right hand woman, Lute, to never treat you in the wrong way, and from that moment on she gains a lot of respect for you as well.

You three are rarely seen walking around without each other actually, unless you’re out and about with your other friends your age, in which case he warns you that they better treat you right or you’re never seeing them again, to which you retort with saying that this is very unlikely since you’ve known them for a while and this is Heaven after all, if they’re here they must’ve earned it somehow. He simply replies that in the rare case that they do something distasteful to you he’s completely willing to send them where they belong – in Hell.

Adam manages to tone it down with the rude nicknames when it comes to you; he will still call you ‘bitch’ or anything of the like, or he might call you a little asshole from time to time if you do something that mildly annoys him, but he will never go too overboard as he doesn’t really wish to make you uncomfortable – the thoughts in his head though might sound something like: “Ah, shit. I basically became a father figure, call them something weird and they’re gone Adam, gone.”

The one time you manage to make Adam, the First Man, emotional, is the night before the Extermination.

With Charlie’s father, Lucifer himself, somehow getting her to visit Heaven and discuss with Sera and Emily themselves, you’re worried that he might be planning to make an appearance and hurt Adam.

Adam dismisses your theories, even dares to call them stupid, and in a fit of emotion you blurt out a “But I don’t want to lose you just for being careless, dad!”.

You quickly realize what you just said and both your hands travel to your mouth, a shocked expression on both you and Adam’s faces.

He mumbles a ‘shit’ before pulling you into a hug with his wing.

“Promise I’ll watch my back, kid.”

#hazbin hotel x reader #hazbin x reader #x reader #adam x reader #adam hazbin hotel #hazbin hotel adam #adam x reader platonic #platonic #hazbin hotel #hazbin

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kleem-o · 8 months

Text

Camouflage: WerewolfBakugou! X reader

Part 2

Synopsis: Years passed since you and Bakugou parted ways, and Bakugou never spent a day without thinking of you. Did you feel the same? Hopefully he’ll know, since fate seems to always bring you together. Part 2 of this.

a/n: heyy here it is yall hope u enjoy, im back at school so updates in my blog might take a while, but i promise to never leave any of these unfinished (including the brahms!dabi)! Love yall also this will probably become a series bc i like taking things slow lol

“FUCK!”

Bakugou hissed in pain as an arrow pierced his shin. “Bakubro! Here– Take cover!” The forest was a mess. Just a mere hour ago everything was going well. Bakugou and his trusty friend, Kirishima, were guarding the gates just like usual. The war was getting worse, it came to a point where right when you left, Bakugou was forced to train, to become a weapon of war. His parents obviously fought hard to keep their child safe, but in reality no one was. The beastmen’s front were getting pushed too much, they needed more men. And Bakugou is just one of thousands of children that were trained to become especially good at fighting, strategizing, killing.

At the age of 17, Bakugou was already being placed at the front, his parents praying for his safety, as they’re left in horror of the trauma that Bakugou would face. They would be relieved and shocked to see their son back home, bearing medals of honor, human soldier’s heads. The beastmen would celebrate their wins, and Bakugou would become a rising icon for them, hope. Bakugou would meet lots of companions, but lots would leave. Either from leaving the military, or by… other means. One of his companions that never left was his friend Kirishima. It was with this friend that he was guarding the gates with, when all of a sudden humans attacked.

This was a surprise to both of them as it was just a day ago that they won against a number of troops from the humans, were they this desperate now? Regardless, it was still a surprise that caught them off guard, even though the beastmen were currently greater in numbers at the moment, Bakugou still got hit. Kirishima forced Bakugou to stay put as the rest fight, and sooner but later, they won.

“Those fucking human dumbass, do they enjoy watching their people die??” Bakugou muttered as a medic was patching up his leg. “Well, it was pretty dumb, probably a last show of pride? Anyway, we still have to focus, there might be more to it than we think.” Kirishima said as he looked outside the window to watch the parade of victory of their soldiers that recently returned from the west. “What…” Kirishima’s eyes widened as he continued to watch outside. “Hey dumbass, what’s happening??” And without looking at Bakugou, he answered “They brought some humans.”

“I swear to god, how many fucking times do I have to tell them to leave civilians?!” Bakugou yelled as he kicked an empty bottle. They were on their way to the hostages, after scolding and beating up, the men that brought humans in their gates despite his several warnings of leaving civilians alone. He knew deep down that not all humans were bad, hopefully. I mean, he met you right? God when will he forget you? It’s been years and he still thinks of you, the way you snuggle up to him at night when it was cold, the way you played with his tail, the way he let you rub his ears, the way your eyes shined when you smiled, your laughter, and that stupid nickname you always called him– “Fluffy?”

Bakugou stopped dead in his tracks, causing Kirishima to bump into him. “Hey what the hell man?” Kirishima watched in surprise as Bakugou quickly turned to the cell where he heard that voice, and there he saw you.

Your face was thin, clothes dirty, and hair a mess, but your eyes still lit up the same way. Just like the first time you both set your eyes on each other, you were alone.“..Y/N?” The way you perked up when he called your name made his heart literally skip a beat. It was you, really you. He immediately opened the cell and entered to embrace you. “God, fluffy, its been a while huh.” You laughed as you hugged him tightly while he buried his face at the crook of your neck. Your scent was still the same, like home. Kirishima chuckled as he saw how Bakugou’s tail wagged back and forth quickly, and Bakugou’s face heated up at the realization. Quickly pulling away, he pulled you with him “Let’s get you outta here..” But you don’t fail to acknowledge how despite talking brash and walking quickly, his hands held yours quite gently.

Bakugou took you to his home secretly, telling Kirishima to deal with everything while Kirishima reluctantly agreed, not wanting to bear the wrath of his best friend. Upon entering his home, Bakugou got the bath ready, took some of his clothes for you to wear, and told you to go have a relaxing bath while he cooked some food for the both of you. Okay, you got this Bakugou, he thought as his tail wagged quickly, he remembered everything his mother taught him about “treating women right.”

Just as you were done bathing, he finished cooking. “Hey, here I cooked something for us–” Bakugou felt heat rise to his neck as he saw you wearing his shirt with your wet hair. “Thanks, fluffy!” Bakugou had to avoid your eyes when he felt his tail wagging furiously again, fucking dumbass, he cursed himself. You both ate in silence when you noticed him avoiding your gaze. “Fluffy, are you embarrassed?” You giggled as you teased the man. “W-what?? Fuck no! I’m just, uh the food is great y’know.” You giggled as Bakugou picked on his food. “..So.. what happened?”

When you both finished eating, you started telling him all that happened in your life. How you never got to meet your brother, how the village that they left you in got raided too, and how you spent most of your life alone, getting by going from one village to another, until a bunch of beastmen took you. You would joke how maybe it’s because you and Bakugou were the ones meant to be with one another, but the sadness and darkness in your eyes didn’t go unnoticed by him. “So, how’s your life here? Where’re Mitsuki, Masaru..?”

“They’re here in this village too, safe and sound.” Bakugou knew his parents would be delighted to meet you, but not now. It was too dangerous for you to be going around the village right now, he had to find a way to keep you hidden here, he’ll just get his parents to come over some time– “Huh..” Bakugou slightly jumped from his seat when he realized how close you gotten. “Can I touch it?” Bakugou was a blushing mess, his throat was closing up, and he felt his stupid fucking tail wag again. “Huh?w-what..” You kept staring into his eyes, he felt like he was being hypnotized, falling deeper into your soul. Was this it? After years of not meeting, were you finally gonna be his? Just like that? He really wanted it to be more romantic like his plans, but who was he to complain, he’d love to be your mate, whether you’re a human did not matter to him one bit. So, with a blush covering his cheeks, neck, and ears he whimpered. “..Yes.” You got closer and closer and he closed his eyes, ready to kiss you when– “haha your ears are as fluffy as ever, fluffy.”

You meant his ears, fuck. Bakugou felt like exploding, he wanted the ground to swallow him whole, he must’ve looked like a fucking idiot, pouting his lips. “..you.. You’ll be the death of me woman!!” Bakugou tackled you into a tickle fight, just like when you were both kids, but this time he actually won. You both talked a lot, telling each other about experiences you both went through, and you noticed that Bakugou’s was full of glory and… kindness. He revealed that he spared a lot of humans mercy, since not all of them actually want to be in this war right? This made your heart ache because he was right, most people were innocent and were just dragged into this mess.

As the night keeps growing, Bakugou decided that it was time for bed. He lead you to his bed and bid you goodnight. When he was about to leave you called out to him. “Fluffy? Where are you going? Aren’t you gonna sleep?” “Of course I’m gonna sleep, I’ll sleep on the couch.” He saw you looked confused, and that irked him a little, did you not think of him as a man? “A man and a woman in bed, at night, all alone? You sure ‘bout that princess?” Your heart skipped a beat at the nickname, and Bakugou smirked seeing you all flustered. “I might not be able to control myself you know–” “-okay, okay! I get it, ‘night fluffy.” Bakugou was about to leave when he said “Call me Katsuki.”

As you lay in his bed, staring at the ceiling you can’t help but think about him. Everything in the room reminded you of him, from the paintings on the wall, the scent of the pillow, even the color of the sheets. It all reminded you of him. And it killed you as much as you loved it, because it reminded you of him, of your mission.

“not all of them actually want to be in this war right?” Your heart ached at Bakugou’s words, because this applied to most people, but not you.

taglist: @iwannahaveaprettyaesthetic @scrumptiouslampwobblercop @zaiban2989 @kbbksworld14 @iam-thevillain-of-thisstory

#bakugou x reader #bakugou x you #bakugou x y/n #bakugou katsuki x reader #bakugou katsuki #mha bakugou #mha #bnha #my hero academia #boku no hero academia #mha headcanons #bnha headcannons #bnha fanfiction #mha fanfiction #x reader #werewolf x reader #werewolf bakugou #werewolf

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stormgardenscurse · 1 year

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hello! i was wondering if i can request headcanons about giving them cheek kisses with riddle, leona, ruggie, kalim, and azul (for azul, i think maybe we kiss his mole under his lips?? pspsps). i saw your blog recently and was really interested in your works! i hope my request isn't asking for too much, and please do take care of yourself! much love and support 💕

A/N: For Leona and Ruggie’s I ended up doing a short drabble instead! Hope you’ll like them and ty for requesting!!

Characters: Riddle, Kalim, Azul, Leona, Ruggie

Riddle

As much as he loves you, Riddle can’t help but want to bury himself into the ground whenever you surprise him with a kiss on the cheek - not because of the gesture itself, but his instinctive reaction that dusts his cheeks red and causes him to stutter.

It takes a while for him to grow an immunity toward this, but you have to admit you’re secretly glad that Riddle still adopts a tiny blush and shy glance away whenever you greet him like so - it’s part of his charm, you argue, how genuinely Riddle tends to react to things, especially when it comes to you - even when he sometimes wishes he could form more dignified responses.

At some point he gets so used to your affection that when you go a while without it, Riddle starts to wonder if something was wrong and drops his professionalism (being an undistracted student in the library) to ask.

You blink, the realization sinking in, and barely manage to stifle your laughter as you realized with a mix of guilt and relief that Riddle really does value your gestures. You’d been distracted because of a tricky assignment you had due soon, but the interaction has certainly boosted your mood while Riddle looks away, sighing in relief that it wasn't anything bad.

Kalim

Suffice to say, Kalim really enjoys physical affection! He’s likely the one that starts it off when you start dating by doing things like linking your arms and just holding your hands whenever you’re together - but if you stop and take a moment, you’ll notice that Kalim doesn’t go any further than that, as if waiting for some cue to show that you’re now comfortable and used to it.

Sure he’s sent you off with quick kisses on the cheek before, but he’s always trying to stay observant about your reactions and when to give you space. He’s trying to get better with this sort of awareness, since he wants to take your relationship seriously

When you start returning his gestures? Kalim’s practically beaming the entire day - and sometimes even asks for a quick kiss on the cheek before he heads off to club or similar. It’s hard to say no when he’s smiling like that, eyes bright with the sort of content happiness he always gets when he’s with you.

Now that your friends think about it… It’s somehow become like you were the sun, and Kalim the flowers leaning toward your attention.

Azul

Affection for Azul is something that takes place after trust has been formed - admittedly, for him to initiate things takes more courage than he’d like to admit, what with mental hurdles and doubts to get past.

But once you settle into a routine of greeting Azul with cheek kisses, he grows to look forward to it even if he tries not to let it show too obviously; it’s in the way his gaze follows you after you’ve entered the room but made no move to get closer to him, and how he tries to act cool about it and return the gesture in quiet moments alone.

Azul’s more than flustered the first time you kiss the mole under his lips - he hadn’t been expecting you to aim there! It surprises him when he hears your reasoning, and if you say that it’s because you cherish every aspect of him, well - how can Azul not fluster at that, when you unblinkingly admit such a meaningful thing?

Really, you have no idea how much your words and gestures affect him. He’s trying his best not to break character while his heart feels like it’s about to burst.

Leona

There are few people that make you feel insane like Leona Kingscholar does. Maybe it’s the smirk he wears whenever he knows he’s got you wrapped around his finger, or how you have to look away to avoid his stupidly handsome face, or…

“Herbivore,” he taps your cheek, “my eyes are up here.”

Leona asking you to kiss him goodbye should really send him to hell. Which is where you’re looking toward: the ground, not his feet. Through it, beneath it; wherever your face wasn’t heating up like you had a fever.

“I know where your eyes are!” You quip back just as fast, to which Leona gives an unconvinced hum. “In what world did you think asking like that would actually make things happen smoothly?!” Now you feel awkward because you missed the chance to play along—it’s been three minutes? Four minutes of stalling since then!

“You’re overthinking.” Leona points out. “It’s not like we haven’t kissed before. Remember that time you had your–”

Hands darting to silence him, you let out a sigh. “...I really wish you didn’t know how to work me up.”

Before he can make another remark, you pull Leona closer to you as your fingers entwine with his. A chaste kiss is placed on his right cheek, then the left - and then you brush your lips against the back of his knuckles, hands held between you.

There’s a question in his eyes about how you managed to miss his lips, but the way his tail is swaying regardless is pretty cute.

Ruggie

At a time when Ruggie was lamenting about the part time jobs he has lined up (he hadn’t expected so many places to call him in at once, thus it ended up clashing with the date he pre-planned), you’d told him you truly didn’t mind pushing the date later so he could rest and prioritize his other duties. He’d said something about you being too nice, but the moment you mentioned that maybe you’ll give him a kiss each time he finishes a shift, his ears perked up as he leaned toward you with interest.

“Wait, you’re serious? You’ll actually do that whenever I finish work now?”

“Just… Just until the date!” You squeaked, not knowing what to do when his eyes were sparkling like that. “And just a quick kiss, like on the cheek or something!”

…Yeah, so the date wasn’t until the end of the week from now, and since then Ruggie’s been slyly ‘redeeming’ his reward whenever you passed by in the corridors (never pushy, of course - just a playful look while he points towards his lips or cheek to remind you of your words). Sometimes you look away and pretend you didn’t notice (you’d get to it later in a more comfortable setting), but when Ruggie joins your table during lunch, you surprise both him and yourself when you greet him with a kiss on the cheek.

Truth be told, it was a misunderstanding. Ruggie was pointing to the line behind him to say something about how long it was, but you mistook it for his usual teasing gesture and instinctively went to follow it up with a kiss. Ruggie’s frozen in surprise for a moment before a wide smile reaches his lips. He bumps his shoulder with yours as he finally sits down.

Shut up, shut up–

“Missed me, did you-?”

#leona kingsholar x reader #azul ashengrotto x reader #riddle rosehearts x reader #kalim al asim x reader #ruggie bucchi x reader #twst x you #twst reader insert #twst headcanons #twst x reader #twst imagines #twst writing #storm writings

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bomberqueen17 · 1 month

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deep in the obsession

ok so IDK how much I've talked about my Special Interest in the Bronze Age on here. At one point (like nanowrimo of 2003 or so) I was trying to write a novel set in the British Isles Bronze Age and I researched as much as I could and there just wasn't much information and I wrote some stuff anyway but it petered out. And ever since then I've kept checking back on various avenues of research and every time there's a new find I'd read as much as I could find about it. And then they discovered the remains of a pile-dwelling settlement in the Fens in England and they've finally just now published the results of that? Well of course I've been obsessively reading about it. (I had actually emailed the Cambridge Archaeology Unit a couple of months ago to ask where I could find the publications, so the timing was good.)

I mean the long and short of it is, they've got a site exposed by modern quarrying activity, which consists of five remaining buildings, which burned down and collapsed into the river channel with all their contents in the 9th century BC; the inhabitants escaped with very few of their possessions, and the rest of the assembly of the items they used in their daily lives are largely present, very well-preserved; whole sets of pots and woodworking tools, as well as textiles and textile-processing materials, foodstuffs, wooden tools, and enough building materials to almost entirely reconstruct their dwellings; a enormous wealth of information about their diets, their ways of living, even some feel for their aesthetic sensibilities. The circumstances of the buildings' collapse even means we know how they laid out their living spaces.

So I am going to infodump about what I've pulled out of these rather dense and dry reports (I have zero complaints, they're perfectly appropriately-written), so buckle up.

Firstly, if you want to read these yourself, the publications are open access PDFs hosted on the Cambridge Archaeology Unit's website here.

There are also a fantastic series of blog posts both from during the excavation and from during the initial analytical "post-ex" phase on the site's website, which I devoured while waiting for the final reports.

I admit I was first drawn to the whole thing, when I first saw stories about it, because of the mystery. It seems to have been a whole settlement, a village maybe, and it all burned down at once, and no humans seem to have died in it, but everyone left everything behind, even leaving a dog in one of the buildings, and some penned little lambs in a couple of them-- what caused this? Were they attacked? Were they forced out of it? It had a palisade around it as if for defense, did they build it because they were afraid, and rightfully so?? Why did they not come back to try to salvage anything? The water would have been shallow, surely they could at least get their axe-heads and things back.

But the thing that has sustained my interest now is that it appears to have been an unexceptional village after all. There's no evidence that these were elite people living here. There weren't any unambiguous weapons found-- part of a broken sword, in what was obviously a recycle bin (a wooden bucket), waiting along with some broken chisels and a bent axe and part of a broken bronze bucket for a trip back to the nearest metalworker. Some spears, but likely used for hunting, stored outside the houses all together leaned up against the palisade under an overhanging roof eave. Axes, but the sheer quantity of woodworking in the site means they were very obviously woodworking tools, and weapons only by technicality.

Other contemporaneous sites are preserved so incompletely that there are always "was this a place people dwelled or was it a ceremonial gathering place" kinds of questions. Artifacts are found either discarded in middens, broken, or deposited in hoards, "ceremonially?". But all this stuff is in-context, in the house, which burned down and collapsed straight down. This was the kitchen area, obviously; all the houses had most of their pots in the same approximate spot, caches of grain in the same area. This corner is where we find stuff they were working on-- one house has probably a loom, and tons of textile-related stuff scattered around it. (There's only evidence for a loom in one or maybe two of the buildings, but there are spindle whorls and bobbins of thread in three; several spinners providing one weaver, as is common throughout history.)

Some of the pots had been broken before the fire, and some of them had been partially discarded and partially kept, like for example a well-shaped broken bit of rim was being used as a scoop or something, while the little unusable shards had gotten chucked into the river where they threw their trash; the archaeologists could reunite fragments to prove this, and could derive the information that these shards would all be associated with the same house; they weren't shared, they were using the broken pot in the same house where they'd used it before it was broken; they seem to have cooked their meals separately, and kept separate inventory of basic household necessities. But the extra stuff seems to have been stored in the communal storage shed, so they could all get to it.

There's a large but incomplete sheet of bark that in places has a second sheet adhered to it with moss in between, which was likely bedding.

There are textiles, not just woven ones but also weft-twined ones made from lime bast cord-- mats, or hats, or capes. There's a knotted fishing net that was rolled up and in a pile with other things in an area that seems to have been a storage shed of sorts. (Near the "recycle bin" full of broken metal.) There's a collection of prepared fiber, ready to be made into cordage or spun into thread, and it's all prepared the same way in standard-sized bundles-- tantalizingly, regular enough as if for trade, stored in that storage shed next to a nested set of new pots-- like somebody had bought or made them and they weren't put to use yet, OR someone had made extra they intended to trade offsite for stuff they couldn't make themselves.

The whole sets of pots are broadly the same among households-- similar numbers of large vs. small, coarse vs. fine. They all resemble one another, though some are better-made than others-- as if several people made them, but under the guidance of one experienced worker.

Several pots and wooden containers have food residues. Hauntingly, there's a ceramic pot that was still half-full of porridge, with a wooden spatula/spoon still stuck in it. The porridge was made of ground wheat cooked in a liquid containing animal fats from a ruminant-- either sheep/goat or red deer-- possibly an early example of frumenty.

Enough of the structural timbers remain from the buildings, many with markings on them from where other structural elements were touching them and alternately exposed/protected them from fire so it is possible to reconstruct shapes and connections in more detail than if they were unburnt ruins, that the buildings can be nearly completely reconstructed, which is novel because most buildings of this era are known only from footprints/post holes. Almost no material survived from the walls, but because of these ghost "protection marks" it's possible to know that the walls existed, how wide they were, that they were attached in a particular spot, that they were made of a series of small uprights-- and to then surmise that some of the fragments of "wattle", woven panels, must have come from the walls in some cases. And it's possible to reconstruct the innovative, never-elsewhere-seen sprung floor system of bowed joists that kept the floors securely above the water below.

Anyway, I've devoured Vol I and am most of the way through scouring Vol II for interesting tidbits.

Yes of course I want to write a novel with this as the setting but I also am just completely fascinated.

#about the author #must farm #archaeology #bronze age

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coriphallus · 3 months

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A little rant on patch 6 and the implications for bg3's future

Okay, bear with me for a sec its gonna go somewhere eventually. My first bg3 run (thats spammed here on this blog) i played ascended astarion/dark urge romance where i picked the reject bhaal and become the absolute ending.

as it was my first playthrough on release i was vibrating off mt seat and i didnt really have elaborate HCs or anything, i was just doing a quick evil run until the bugs get sorted out. i didn't think much beyond "yes this dude would want the shiny stones for himself"

first time i saw astarion enthralled, i was confused. he asked me to do it, he was quite insistent on it since the beginning of the game. i was confused for a couple of hours, digesting the entire game i just played. Then it hit me; the game was calling me out. it was telling me ive been stupid for not having seen this coming and at that point i felt awe.

it was right, everything pointed to this, it was right in front of my eyes all i needed was to connect the dots that the game laid out quite visibly and i was just too caught up to see.

'well my durge would never do that' didnt matter because thats exactly what the companions thought. Gale thought the powers of an insatiable weave wouldnt corrupt him, that he'd stay true to himself, shadowheart thought shar had blessed and her she'd guide her, that she could be her true self under her influence, astarion thought he'd be free, that he'd cherish the bond he'd made with the player but at the end of the day power reveals; and when that power is acquired through the corpses of thousands its quite evident that Absolute power corrupts absolutely. IT WAS IN THE FKIN NAME.

it was a shining bait i was so focused on getting my hands on that i didn't look back to see the mountain of corpses i had to step on to get there. the game was telling me 'HEY LOOK AT EVERYTHING YOU'VE DONE TO GET HERE, LOOK AT WHAT HAPPENED TO ALL THE OTHERS WHO THOUGHT THEY COULD ACHIEVE THIS, DO YOU THINK YOU'D HOLD HANDS AND SING KUMBAYA WITH YOUR FRIENDS AFTER ALL THIS?'

just as there was never an option where frodo could stab saurons flaming eyeball and sit on his throne with the ring on his finger and sam at his side, there was never an ending i could get my 'happy ending' the way id like it to. i wanted frodo to remain in middle earth and have some peace in the end, i didnt understand how he was 'too changed' to remain and sam wasnt when i first read the books. i was angry even, that i didnt get what i wanted. it wasnt like tolkien haphazardly put together an ending out of his ass bcs he didnt know what to do with the characters, its not that he didn't think while writing that the fans would hate it, he wrote a story that achieved its catharsis by reaching its narrative conclusion. it couldnt have done that any other way. it was deliberate. i may not have understood or agreed at the time but it was the story he wanted to tell, and it wouldnt be one of the greatest stories ever told if the writer wanted to please a 10 y/o like myself.

it was never out of character for my durge at all, i was just blissfully avoiding the NARRATIVE.

months later we get this absolute narrative abomination:

and all i can say is im worried.

im worried bcs this is a clear disrespect to the story they've written, im worried bcs if they can do off with huge plot elements and beats such as this just like that it shows a lack of commitment to their own plot and if a huge Point of the game can be treated like a minor mistake than what else can? was is just a lack of oversight that laezel gets killed under vlaakith? can it be waved off if enough vlaakith loving gith players come together and shout loud enough that they want to ride alongside their queen with their gith gf?

what part of the game is tangible to hold on to, and after two years worth of patches that are made to appease the fans at the expense of the story, will it still be the game i fell in love with?

i dont blame the fans for wanting, i blame the devs for delivering. that they could sacrifice the integrity of a pretty straightforward story bodes ill tidings for the future of this game.

yes i wanted this feature, but i was glad i wasn't given it. i may have been confused and slightly miffed that i didn't get to reign supreme with my evil bf, but i immensely respected the game that could call me out on it. i wish they could show the same respect to their own writing.

#bg3 #bg3 spoilers #baldur's gate 3 #patch 6

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t-lostinworlds · 9 months

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A Strange(r’s) Comfort | Peter Parker

A/N: had this idea right after i saw nwh which was...years ago now lol. rewatched it again recently so here’s me dusting off a wip that’s been sitting in my drafts. basically, this is just me giving peter some comfort in a way, bc that boy really needs one :((

》 PAIRING: peter parker x female!reader 》 TROPE/GENRE: strangers to lovers (mostly implied); soft angst; hurt/comfort 》 SUMMARY: Peter found a strange comfort in the graveyard, no less. But hearing about your day-to-day had been the highlight of his. And when one night led to the both you showing vulnerability, suddenly, Peter didn't feel so alone anymore. Maybe a stranger's comfort wasn't so bad. 》 WARNINGS: Spoilers? (i mean it’s been a while); bad jokes/puns (one about chicken & one about sex lmao); peter eavesdropping (sorta...ya know, enhanced hearing); it’s mostly set in the graveyard so...; mentions of: death, car accident, drunk drivers, being in jail for a moment, petty theft, peer pressure; and overall just dealing with grief and peter & reader bonding over their experience with grief. 》 WORD COUNT: 5.2k+ (issa baby fic)

📍 BLOG NAVIGATION ✩ P. PARKER MASTERLIST ✩ MAIN MASTERLIST ✩

⊱ ─────.⋅♚ *｡･ﾟ.★. *｡･ﾟ✫*.

Some might consider it unhealthy, but was there really a 'right' way to deal with the loss of someone you hold near and dear to your heart? They might even say it was excessive, but who were they to police him? They didn't know what he was going through. They could never understand what he was going through.

A part of him had excused it with his wounds being fresh, that with time, he'd be able to learn not to dwell too long on the remnants of the people he loves. Maybe with time, he'd be able to move on, something that seemed so impossible at the moment. But he'll get there—well, he hoped so, at least.

Either way, there was no doubt that everyone handled grief differently.

For Peter Parker, that was visiting May's grave every day.

Once was enough.

That was what he limited himself to, at least.

But still, it was barely enough to settle the demons in his head. Barely enough to stop him from replaying the scene over and over.

Peter had been recalculating in utter desperation as to what else he could've done better, what else he could've done more to save her.

That was what it was like most nights.

Some nights, though, his mind would switch things up a bit, thinking that maybe he was going about it wrong. Maybe it was a case of what he shouldn't have done.

Those nights Peter sometimes found himself picking apart every choice he'd ever made before it led to that point.

Maybe if he hadn't chosen to go on that stupid school trip to Europe then this wouldn't have happened. Maybe his identity wouldn't have been revealed and it wouldn't have led for that first domino to tumble, knocking over the rest that made his life turn for the absolute worse.

Or maybe, he didn't need to go that far back in the past. Maybe he simply shouldn't have chosen to question Dr. Strange's decision to send those villains back to where they came from immediately.

But sadly, that was all there was to it.

Peter's thoughts were simply and only just a whole bunch of unanswerable maybes.

Maybe this, maybe that. Maybe he owed it to them to try his best and fix things, maybe he didn't owe them anything at all. Maybe it was the wrong choice to try and save everyone, maybe it was right.

Aunt May said he did the right thing.

But it didn't feel like it sometimes.

Hell, it didn't even feel like it was even worth it. And no matter how much he tried to tell himself that it was right, his thoughts still managed to convince him that every. single. choice he made was simply wrong.

It wasn't even difficult to come to that conclusion anymore. Because ever since he got bitten by that spider, his loss considerably outweighed all his wins. And from then onwards, it just felt like he kept losing, and losing, and losing, and losing.

Right now, the most mundane thing he'd been losing lately was sleep, at the very least.

He'd gotten a job as a delivery guy at this small chicken joint a couple of streets down his apartment. Some might call it cheating—in his opinion, it was simply taking a shortcut—but he'd leave the bicycle they'd lend him in an alleyway and just swing the chickens to their destination. Sure, changing in and out of his suit was a bit tiring but it was definitely far better than dealing with New York traffic.

Apart from that, he'd also begun with some freelance photography work, dusting off the old DSLR camera Ben and May got him. He got decent at it a while back. But it got long forgotten the minute they bought him his first video game console, two years later.

He was starting off small, from random birthday parties to taking photos of restaurants or any establishment that was looking to use the pictures for ads or whatever. He was up for anything, anyone who didn't mind getting an okay photo at best.

There wasn't much to it, though, since nobody was really keen on hiring someone who didn't have experience. As a matter of fact, he didn't even have a high school diploma. Which had now led to him sacrificing countless hours of studying for his GED tests.

So, it was safe to say that he was handling a lot, especially juggling it with his still ongoing nighttime patrols.

Yet all of that seemed so much easier compared to what he had to deal with once he was lying in bed, wide awake even if it was past midnight. What went on in his day-to-day was only a fraction of the reason why he was losing sleep because his damning thoughts just had a habit of being so loud once everything else had quieted down.

It was hard as it was dealing with grief, even though he for sure had dealt with it more times than needed in such a short amount of time.

But what was more difficult about it this time around, was dealing with alone.

And Peter Parker was truly and utterly, alone.

No fellow Avenger to advise on ways to deal with this. After all, they were the only people who could understand even the slightest bit of what he was going through.

Saving the rest only to fail at saving one, losing someone in the midst of fighting for the rest of the world.

No Happy to offer some guidance on dealing with the loss of someone near and dear to you. Or for him to just be there as someone Peter could relate to, just like when Tony had died.

No Ned and MJ to give him company, offer their different ways of comfort as best as they could. They weren't there to simply make him laugh, offer that tiniest moment of reprieve, distract him with their theories and arguments about anything and everything to help him escape from, well, everything.

Right now, Peter had no one.

Going from having the people he truly cared about be only one call away, to suddenly being someone labeled as 'unknown number' in their contact lists, it was difficult.

But maybe he would just learn to live with it.

And maybe the first step to being able to live with his grief was to visit May frequently.

It didn't matter what time of the day it was. Whether it was early morning or just a few minutes after lunch, or when the sky started tinting orange as the sun slowly set. Midday or midnight, dusk or dawn, it didn't matter as long as he could visit her just once.

Maybe a part of him was hoping that by some miracle he'd hear her voice again, telling him, even if it was the last time, that you're going to be okay.

Peter needed it, so badly. He needed to be told that things would turn out alright because him being fine? It seemed like a far-off dream at this point.

He'd been to space, been to the mirror dimension, fought villains from other universes, been the center of a spell that erased people's memories and made them forget who he was.

Surely hearing the voice of a loved one that had passed wasn't too much to ask?

Yet every day, every moment he ventured into the graveyard, he was met by silence.

Well, aside from the distant hum of New York as life moved on. There was also the deep howl of the wind at night, a few cracking branches accompanied by the soft coo of crows.

Some would probably find peace from all the white noise, but Peter couldn't say he found any comfort in it. He'd only grown accustomed to it, used to tuning out the rest of the world to avoid being reminded of a life he once had.

Still, quietness had always been typical during his visits.

That, until one Saturday afternoon.

•••

Peter sensed another person approaching before he could even see them.

The soft crunch of fallen leaves was what he heard first, followed by a soft humming of some holiday song.

He looked up from the book he was reading, curious eyes landing on someone carrying flowers, a slight pep in her step which was unusual given the location.

Still, there was something about you that Peter couldn't help but be drawn to.

"There we go, all nice and clean," he heard you say, rustling of dried leaves and the soft brushing of clothes following suit. "And flowers well hydrated with bottled spring water."

You were talking to yourself.

It was a habit, he assumed. You just seemed comfortable doing it, as if you were having a mundane conversation with someone else.

Peter found it oddly endearing.

"I brought your favorite this time Dad because I am sure you're complaining to Mom why I always bring her favorite flowers," you explained with a soft laugh. "I sometimes forget you're a flowers type of guy, too."

No—you weren't talking to yourself.

You were talking to the gravestone.

His curiosity piqued even more.

It wasn't that you were being loud, either. Not at all. You were speaking softly as you typically would if you were by yourself in a graveyard, no less.

But because of his enhanced hearing, he simply couldn't help but listen.

"Sorry I haven't been here for a little while, just been busy with you know, moving, college, finding a job with a minimum wage that will not cover rent alone so what even is the point? We look for a job to survive but when we do find a job it doesn't even pay you enough to get by? Some people don't even hire you because 'not enough experience' and I'm like, duh? I'm trying to gain experience hence why I'm applying? Who even invented this shithole?"

Peter found himself nodding along, unable to argue with your claims when they were filled with nothing but the truth.

"Sorry, sorry, it just doesn't make a damn sense," you sighed. He could almost hear you rolling your eyes. "Anyway, I then have other adult things I really don't want to deal with like learning how to deal with taxes and stuff which is so dumb given I'm close to broke and—where does my tax go, anyway? Some politician's tenth vacation to the Bahamas, probably."

For the first time in a long while, Peter cracked a smile.

"Ugh, I am sorry, I promise I don't come here only to complain to you guys," you said, "But I am doing okay…"

He couldn't really explain the 'why,' but the soft tug in his heartstrings was definitely real when he heard the melancholia in your voice.

"The holidays are coming up," you said softly, the slight shake in your tone unmistakable. Yet as it rushed to the surface, it was just as quickly replaced with a chipper one.

"They always tell me how you both are watching over me now. But I don't know if I really want that," you sighed exaggeratedly. "Not because I hate you guys. But imagine if I was having sex? I really don't want to think about you 'watching over me' because it's really uncomfortable."

Peter couldn't stop his snort, his eyes widening as he spared you a glance. He was as grateful that you didn't seem to hear him.

The last thing he wanted was for you to think he was eavesdropping—well, maliciously, at least.

"It's a joke, Mom. See, Dad gets it."

Silence hung in the air after that, a sudden gust of wind blowing away the leaves that littered the snow-covered grass.

But he had a feeling the shake in your voice wasn't because of the cold.

"I really miss you guys…"

Peter left at that.

He didn't see you again for the next few days, probably because he never did visit at the same hour of the day. He never actively tried to see what time you were there, either—if you went every day at all. He'd just become a stalker at that point.

So, every time you did cross paths, it was entirely by chance.

The next encounter was when he brought his lunch with him to the graveyard. He'd caught sight of you sitting on a pink blanket that was laid out on the grass, legs crossed with a box of pizza to your right.

Instinctively, you looked up and over your shoulder when you heard his footsteps.

Your eyes immediately locked with his.

Pretty was the first word that came to his mind.

Beautiful, when you offered him a sweet and warm smile.

"Hello," you greeted.

Peter couldn't help but smile in return.

"Hi."

Nothing else was said after that.

You both respectively ate your lunches in your little corners, your soft humming bringing a comforting peace, one he still couldn't quite explain.

And from there on out, Peter learned that you did go there every day, but it was only either at lunchtime or late in the afternoon.

Because whenever Peter went during those times, you were always there.

As he said, he never actively tried to be there whenever you were. He didn't change anything with his routine. He still went there at random times of the day.

You and him crossing paths simply happened.

And most of those moments, Peter couldn't help but listen in on your rambles.

It might have been wrong, otherwise, creepy, but it wasn't like you were unaware of his presence. You weren't being loud, but you weren't exactly whispering into nothing either. If it were an unenhanced being, they would still hear you, but maybe only slightly inaudible. Peter just had the ability to make out your words a little clearer than the average person.

Besides, all your stories had been mundane at most, quite adorable at best.

Like that one time you ran into a post because you saw a cat wearing some boots and a clear raincoat across the road. Or that time you missed your stop in the subway because you kept talking to a Corgi who was lounging comfortably in their owner's backpack.

"His little legs were so cute!"

Like he said, adorable.

But if it was something personal, though, he'd learned to tune it out. He made sure to keep those matters out of his ear, leaving your private conversations, well, private.

Yet your silly and terrible jokes, your gripes about society and the unfairness of the world, to your little story times and mundane gossip of what you'd heard on the street, Peter couldn't help but tune in as if he was listening to the morning radio.

It made Peter feel lighter somewhat, a feeling he never once associated when being in a graveyard.

He didn't know if it was your stories, or if it was simply hearing that soft tone of your voice. Either way, he found it comforting, which was so strange.

Never had he ever thought he would find comfort from a stranger, no less.

A strange comfort.

•••

"People always ask why did the chicken cross the road. They never ask why the chicken didn't cross the road."

Peter perked up in curiosity, ready to hear another of the many jokes you'd completely ruined.

He found it absolutely hilarious how you were churning typical and old punchlines into horrible ones.

The funniest part was, it seemed like you were doing it on purpose.

"Why, you ask? Because they physically can't anymore," you said, pausing for added effect. "People enjoy eating chicken legs way too much."

Peter's eyes grew wide, gaze landing on the chicken leg he just finished. He couldn't stop the sound that escaped his lips.

It was a mix between a wheeze, a laugh, and a cough.

Loud enough to get your attention.

"Hey," you called, voice sounding closer. "Are you okay?"

"Oh—uhm, hi," he stammered, caught off guard when you were now suddenly in front of him. Clearing his throat, he nodded. "And yeah, I'm good,"

"Do you need some water?" You offered him a bottle.

"No, no, I've got my own," he declined, lifting his bottle. "But thank you."

"Oh okay," you said, smiling sweetly. "It just sounded like you were choking or something so I wanted to make sure if you were alright."

Peter blushed.

"No, I was…uhm—" He scratched the back of his neck. "I was holding back my laugh."

You tilted your head, bottom lip jutted out and Peter found himself thinking of ways to smooth out the little crinkled on your forehead, maybe kiss—wait what?

"Why would you do that?" you asked.

Shit.

Did I say that out loud?

"Sorry?" He blinked at you.

"Why would you hold back your laugh?"

"Oh," he sighed, mostly in relief. "Just didn't want to seem creepy and I wasn't…eavesdropping or anything but I uhm—heard your joke." Chuckling shyly, he smiled. "It was pretty funny."

"Funny because it was bad?" You raised a knowing brow. "If you say it was good then I'm really going to question your sense of humor."

"It was really bad," he admitted, breathing out a laugh.

The way your smile brightened made Peter's heart do a funny thing.

"Thanks," you giggled. "I pride myself in my bad jokes."

"Yeah," he breathed out, willing his heart to stop being so goddamn weird, what is going on with you? "And sorry for not helping the chickens cross the road."

You stared at him confused.

That was until he pointed towards the bag on the ground that had the logo of a chicken on it.

Your hearty laugh rang in the air.

Peter found himself growing warmer at the sound, the burn starting right in his chest and spreading to the whole expanse of his body.

"I—whew, sorry, wow," you heaved after a moment. "Haven't laughed like that in a while."

Both of you fell silent after that—not an awkward one. If anything, it was pleasant, like there was an unspoken understanding being exchanged with a simple look.

"This may seem like weird advice but try and talk to them," you softly said.

Peter looked at you, confused.

You gestured toward the tombstone with a sympathetic smile.

"They might hear it, they might not, there's really no way of knowing," you explained. "But what more could you lose if you try? Plus, you'll get it off your chest and that's always progress."

"I—" Peter nodded, the corner of his lips curling up. "Thank you. I'll keep it in mind."

You smiled at that. "I'll see you around."

"See you around," he hummed, gaze never leaving your figure even as you left, his eyes steady on the path you walked on as he mulled over your words.

It was kind of weird advice, but at the same time, it made perfect sense.

Peter didn't question it nor did he judge—who was he to judge? After all, everyone handled grief differently.

But as he sat down on the ground, eyes steady on the lettering of May's name, he found the words flowing out so easily.

"Hi, May I—" Peter took a sharp breath, blinking away the sting that started to settle in his eyes. "Wow. It's been a while since I've talked to you, huh?"

It started out simple, filling her up with what was new with his life recently—the job, his education, all those mundane stuff.

But then as he shifted from one topic to another, he inevitably started talking about all the things that felt so wrong. And once that train left the station, it was so difficult to stop.

It wasn't a complaint. It was an unloading of the baggage he'd been carrying around alone for quite some time now.

All the loneliness and grief, the boiling anger and consuming regret, the love and the love lost, to the bleak look of what his future held.

Peter didn't realize he was crying until a soft gush of wind brushed his cheeks, the coldness making him catch his breath with a shiver.

And then, a small white butterfly flew right in front of him, stopping momentarily before disappearing into the now setting sky.

Peter let out a breath.

Lighter and relieved.

It could've been a coincidence, or maybe it wasn't at all.

But what more could he lose if he took that as a sign that she heard him?

So with a small, tearful smile, he sighed,

"Thanks for always hearing me out, May."

Since then, he'd grown to tell May about his day. Some were tougher than others, while some were snippets of his new life—mundane and simple but starting to become fulfilling the more he looked at it from different perspectives.

As the weeks passed by, Peter's everyday visits became every other day. At first, the guilt of missing a day was heavily consuming. But it didn't take long for it slowly turn into a soft lull—still there, but not as bad as it used to be.

There was one other thing he hoped for whenever he wandered into the graveyard, though.

To see you again.

If it was one last time just so he could say thank you, then he'd take it.

That didn't mean he wasn't wishing for it to be more.

•••

The hair on every inch of Peter's body stood up when he heard it.

It was definitely not his spider sense going awry. This was very much a human reaction.

Well, he could imagine that when the first thing a person would hear as they venture into a graveyard in the dead of the night was crying, even the toughest men would get spooked.

But as soon as Peter located the source of the sound, his heart broke.

He wasn't expecting to find you, sat on the cold ground alone, hugging your knees to your chest, body shaking with sobs.

His first instinct was to fight whoever it was that made you cry because how fucking dare they?

But with a controlled breath, Peter walked over to you, making sure to step on dried leaves so you'd be aware of his presence.

Your head snapped up at the sound, puffy red eyes landing on him.

His frown could only deepen as he slowly sat beside you, offering you a tender smile with his arms wide open.

You stared at him with furrowed brows, eyes switching between his face and his open arms, downright confused.

Peter couldn't blame you. After all, you didn't know him.

He was ready for you to yell at him for being a creep, to scream at him to get lost. He was prepared for you to push him away—hell, punch him in the face—and run as fast as you could.

But instead, your lips quivered, a broken sob following suit. With your head hung low, you fell into his embrace.

And Peter hugged you as tightly as he could.

He didn't say anything, didn't feel like it was needed. He simply held you close, rubbing circles over your back as he gently rocked you from side to side.

Crying it all out until you couldn't anymore was, most of the time, the best thing you could do at the moment.

So he let you.

Only when your sobs turned to sniffles to soft shaky breaths did you pull away.

"Your shirt," you gasped shakily, bottom lip jutting out as your eyes began to water again. "Oh no, I'm sorry."

"Hey, it's okay," he reassured, squeezing your shoulders before reluctantly letting you go. "I wouldn't have offered you a hug if I minded."

"Thank you," you whispered. "I really needed that."

"No worries." He nodded with a small smile. "Do you want to talk about it?"

"It's just—" you sighed, wiping your face with the sleeves of your coat. "It's my first holiday alone so it's been kinda tough."

"Me too," he hummed, smiling sadly when you looked at him, a mixture of surprise and understanding crossing your face. "My parents have been gone since I was a kid, and I was left with my uncle and aunt. My uncle died a few years ago so all I had left was her but now she's…"

"I'm sorry," you softly said, your hand finding his.

You gave it a squeeze.

Peter squeezed back.

"I only had my parents growing up," you started, gesturing at the tombstone. "Didn't get to meet my grandparents, never really met many of my relatives because they're all halfway across the world, so now it's just me."

Peter didn't know what it was, exactly. Maybe it was the warmth of your hand still holding his and your kind eyes bearing no judgment or pity. Maybe it was the sheer comfort you provided, one that he still couldn't quite explain.

Either way, he found himself sharing what it had been like for him. Sure, he left out details to keep his deepest secret uncovered, and to come and think about it, it was mostly things connected to Aunt May. But Peter definitely spilled way too much to someone he barely even knew.

He did not regret it one bit.

"I promised to protect her and I—"

"I'm sure you gave it your all," you assured.

"Not enough to keep her alive," he scoffed, tone far more bitter than he intended to. He caught himself, shaking his head. "Sorry, sorry—"

"Never apologize for how you feel," you said firmly.

Peter nodded, his attention caught by your thumb that was absentmindedly running circles over the back of his hand. You'd been holding onto it as you listened to his story, and he found himself not minding it at all.

If anything, a part of him wanted you to never let go.

"But I get it," you breathed out. "The whole 'this is my fault' thing."

"Was it an accident?" he asked softly.

You nodded. "Car crash. Some drunk frat boys thought it was a good idea to test out how fast they could go in their new truck into an open road."

He frowned. "That's not your fault."

"It is," you insisted. "They wouldn't have been out on the road in the first place if they weren't coming to pick me up in the dead of the night." Shaking your head, you scoffed, "I wish I could say I was at a friend's house but they were coming to bail me out of jail."

Attempting to lighten up the mood, Peter softly bumped his shoulder with yours. "Am I in the midst of a troublemaker?"

That earned him a teary chuckle.

He took it as a win.

"Not quite," you sighed, your smile fading. "Got hung up with the wrong crowd. They kept teasing me that I was too much of a miss goody two shoes and that I should live a little."

"Peer pressure is one nasty thing."

"Yeah well, I still did it." You shrugged, anxiously gnawing on your bottom lip. "A group of us were walking home from a party and we passed by this random minimart on the way. My so-called friends thought it was a good idea to dare me to steal one thing from the store, to break my 'good girl' streak as they put it.

"They all gave me ultimatums, one of them was either I steal something or they'll tell the whole school that I was the real definition of 'The freaks in bed are always the quiet ones' so my loser reputation is no more. They said they can't hang around me anymore if I kept being the loser of the group. It was tough because they were all the friends I had."

Peter couldn't stop the surge of pure anger that ran through him. "They sound fucking horrible."

"Yeah, and I was stupid enough to go along with it." Shaking your head, you chuckled, tone void of humor. "It wasn't even the owner who saw me, it was some random white woman yelling bloody murder as if I was burning the goddamn place down. And the second my friends saw the security guards? Oh, they ran, left me there to fend for myself."

Peter unclenched his fist, settling to rub circles on your back instead.

"It was one candy," you choked back a sob, gesturing towards the tombstone. "But the punishment feels—"

Peter wrapped an arm around your shoulder, pulling you in for a side hug when you started crying again.

"And you know what hurts most?" you whimpered, fisting his jacket as you laid your head on his shoulder. "Knowing that the last memory they had of me was just filled with disappointment."

"I'm sure that's not true," he said softly, squeezing you close. "They loved you."

"I know they did I just—"

"Wish you could go back and change every decision you made?"

You lifted your head off his shoulder and looked at him, eyes glossy yet he saw the flicker of gratefulness in them.

Peter felt it in himself too, an appreciation to finding someone who could understand even the littlest bit of what he was going through.

"Yeah," you shakily breathed out, letting out a soft laugh as you wiped your nose. "God, what a way to celebrate the holidays, huh?"

He chuckled at that, nodding.

It was definitely something, crying your heart out, spilling all your trauma to a stranger in the dead of night at a graveyard.

But there was only one thought that stayed at the forefront of his mind.

Peter didn't feel so alone anymore.

"Yeah," he hummed, a shy smile playing on his lips. "But I'm glad I'm not alone."

Your whole face brightened, your fingers interlacing with his.

"Me too," you said, smiling. "We're going to be okay."

Peter felt some weight lift off his entire back at those simple words of reassurance.

"We're going to be okay."

Teasingly bumping his shoulder with yours, you hummed, "I'm Y/N, by the way."

You both laughed at the absurdity of it, getting to know each other's pain, regret, hurt and grief before even getting the chance to know a name.

"Peter," he sighed, squeezing your hand. "Peter Parker."

Later that night, he somehow gathered up the courage to ask if you wanted to get some hot cocoa with him. And when you said yes with that smile he'd grown to adore so much, Peter had an inkling that you wouldn't stay a stranger to him in the long run.

But for now, as you laid your head on his shoulder, your soft breaths visible in the cold air, tiny snowflakes on your lashes, face glowing underneath the moonlight, warmth and contentment bloomed in his chest.

Peter was smiling.

Genuine and pure, and perhaps a sign of a new beginning.

A stranger's comfort wasn't so bad, after all.

✫*ﾟ･ﾟ｡.★.*｡･ﾟ♛ *.

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