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ask-thearchivists · 7 months

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Don't be silly anon.

Collectors have teeth to nibble one another, look at Cartographer per example, they enjoy being nibbled.

One nom and they change color from blue to red in a blink of a eye.

*smirk*

The Cartographer: I absolutely do not! Stop slandering me!

The Curator: Also none of us bite each other ever.

The Charmer: With the exception of the Curator, who has bitten my hand.

The Curator: Yeah, that happens to hands when they're in my face.

#ask blog #ask the archivists #asks are open #the owl house #toh #id in alt text #toh the archivists #the archivists #toh oc #body is still in so much pain #sister of mine you are not allowed to ask for a favor from me for two years #posts might still be sparse because I'm going to be doing some art since I haven't been able to in almost a week

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tea-cat-arts · 4 months

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Shen Yuan getting transported into pidw isn't "the system punishing him for being a lazy internet hater," but instead representative of "step 1 of the creative process: getting so mad at something you decide to go write your own fucking book" in this essay I will

#svsss #scum villian self saving system #shen qingqiu #shen yuan #the fact that people think scum villain #-a series that examines and criticizes common tropes in fiction-#is somehow against criticism or being a little hater is wild to me #especially since shen qingqiu never gets punished for being a hater #heck- he's still a little hater by the end of the series #he mostly gets punished for treating life like a play and like he and the people around him are characters #(or in other words- he suffers for denying his own wants and emotions and his own sense of empathy)#I think some of y'all underestimate how much writing/art is inspired by creaters being little haters #like example off the top of my head-#the author of Iron Widow has been pretty vocal about the book being inspired by their hatred of Darling in the Franxx #I think my interpretation of Shen Yuan's transmigration is also supported by the fact that this series is an examines writing processes #side note- though i understand why people say Shen Yuan is lazy and think its a valid take it still doesnt sit right with me #i am probably biased because my own experiences with chronic pain and depression and isolation #but ya- i dont think Shen Yuan is lazy so much as he is deeply lonely and feels purposeless after denying parts of himself for 20ish years #like yall remember the online fandom boom from covid right?#being stuck completely alone in bed while feeling like shit for 20 days straight does shit to your brain #the fact that no one came to check on him + he wasn't exactly upset about leaving anyone behind supports the isolation interpretation too #+in the skinner demon arc he describes his life of being a faker/inability to stop being a faker now that he's Shen Qingqiu #as “so bland he's tempted to throw salt on himself” and “all he could do is lay around and wait for death” (<-paraphrasing)#bro wants to be doing stuff but is stuck in paralysis from repeatedly following scrips made by other people #another point on “Shen Yuan isn’t lazy” is just the sheer amount of studying that man does #also he did graduate college- how lazy can he really be #he doesnt know what hes doing but he at least tries to actively train his students #and he actually works on improving his own cultivation + spends quite a bit of time preping the mushroom body thing #+he's experiencing bouts of debilitating chronic pain throughout all this #but ya tldr: Shen Yuan's transmigration is an encouragement to write and not a punishment and also i dont think its fair to call him lazy

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purrfectlycontent · 5 months

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they…

#my ramblings #okay first. baby kdj is adorable #thank you sleepy-c for blessing my eyes #second. lsk smiling for him despite all the painful bruises on her body #lsk did everything she could to protect her son but it still wasn’t enough #in the end he grew up without her and became a person on his own #yet they’re still so similar. they both love too much. they both make the same mistakes that negatively affect those around them #augh…#orv #omniscient reader’s viewpoint #lee sookyung #kim dokja

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triglycercule · 20 days

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nightmare viewing the murder time three as little toys but more in like a little spoiled kid kinda way. because it would be funny and if you take into the account that he was like 6 before getting corrupted and do some mental loopholes it would be even funnier. like these are his dolls (killer dust and horror) and this is their barbie dreamhouse (his castle). they all have to stay in one room because nightmare needs to keep his toys in a toy box. the toys only ever come out when he wants to play but oh damn it they keep on breaking out!! silly toys,,, and then he locks them into the room again.

nightmare serves them food with plastic tea cups and plastic plates and there is no food. there is no tea. they have to imagine the food because dolls can't literally eat. there are food containers and stuff in the house but its all just a bunch of empty boxes. horror starts tweaking out after he scavenges the kitchen and finds a cereal box and milk carton that have NOTHING in it (why keep empty boxes?????)

they have to go where he wants them to go. nightmare gets to dress them up in whatever he wants because theyre his dolls they can wear anything he wants. it gets incredibly embarrassing when the trio is forced to wear pink pretty dresses and fight like that. or they have to go around the castle doing stupid fucking roleplays and it gets weird because theyre being forced to reenact a bullying scene and nightmare's giving them the death stare if they don't get it right (is this projection. this must be some form of coping mechanism dust theorizes)

and then you know nightmare's not exactly the best toy owner so he loses a few of his dolls here and there. maybe they get destroyed when he was playing a bit too rough with them! (killer dies in battle for like the 29th time) but its okay because he can just go back on down to the store (something new) and buy. wait no. steal another doll and then put it back in his dreamhouse and BOOM he has a full set again!! so sweet so cute. his dolls don't have consciousness what are you talking about theyre begging to be let go?? that's all just your imagination. what do you mean you're asking about the several slowly dying bodies with removed arms or legs in his dungeon. oh that's just where the broken but not yet destroyed toys go dw theyre fine its humane

#toy story but evil #imagine nightmare dresses the trio up in dreamtale esque clothes and then forces them to pretend to be his parents #because the stupid shit grew up parentless and now that he has dolls he can just roleplay that now #or he could just make the trio roleplay as a family. one parent two children. huh i wonder where i've heard this before #he's still like totally smart with all the multiversal plans and conquering and manipulation and all that #just that he's still got a bit of childish charm in him yk.🥺🥺🥺 he's sweet and cute 🥺🥺🥺🥺#killer says as he tries not to go insane from being stuck in a room with dust amd horror for weeks on end #nightmare has no sense of boundary for the trio because theyre just little toys for him #if he wants them to change clothes he strips them because dolls cant change by themselves #if he wants them to move a specific way he maneuvers them because dolls cant movs on their own #nightmare's messing around and has all his dolls in the splits because who hasnt done that #dust and horror are in so much pain. killer just feels humiliated #these are GROWN MEN you are objectifying here nightmare. LITERALLY objectifying. but irs okay its funny #dadmare but instead of nightmare being the dad he's the kid. while also simultaneously having all the power #this would go for a sick ass plotline if someone made a fic for it #it aint gonna be me 🤣🤣 but like.... trio has to convince nightmare to stop treating them like goddamn dolls #and nightmare has to change his stupid little kiddy mentality while also they all have to just get on better terms in general #so stupidn so dumb. would the mtt hate eachother during all this. quite possibly #three crazy freaks trapped in one room for unknown amounts of time. homoerotic arguments must have occured #they must know stuff about eachother that they don't wanna know. they all know what they look like naked #nightmare is the leading cause of mtt deaths because he just doesn't know how to properly handle his toys #oops he says as he accidentally breaks horror's neck and dust and killer watch on. guess its time to get a new one!#and he gleefully skips off to horrortale while dust and killer are left with the dusting beheaded body. what a fun time #killer sans #dust sans #horror sans #nightmare sans #murder time trio #bad sanses #tricule rant

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puppetmaster13u · 1 year

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Continuing to think about This AU idea and just, slowly rotating it like a microwave.

@phoenixcatch7 had the fun idea of xenomorph-inspiration and the dollhouse being replaced by the Hive instead and I am here for that. A large cave that feels utterly wrong to anyone not part of their colony, if they can even find it. I am thinking something similar to Gemini Home Entertainment if anyone has watched that, with something between plant and flesh growing across the walls. Where one can't tell the difference between the two, or realize that it's already gripping onto them. The caves are already dangerous after all, nevermind the depths that It doesn't let anyone else into.

Also made me think about Jason, and like, so he doesn't die in the cryptid au, and definitely wouldn't in a world where he has a flesh puppet. But that still makes me think about how badly said puppet would be utterly maimed, right? Not to mention the explosion that would burn a lot of it too alongside whatever affect that'd have on his mind and human body. But now I am thinking of how the tunnels are everywhere under Gotham, how the bits of tendrils can reach through that ash, can meld with it, can for a cocoon of sorts. Turning a little robin into something else, letting it evolve into something new.

I am also rotating on if they'd be known to the Justice League like in the Doll au or if only Clark knows about them like in the Genesis au. Tempted for the second if only so there can be fun distinctly Not Human moments. Maybe the Justice League even getting concerned for their friend Superman because there's times he'll whistle or chirp under his breath (he might have picked up a few habits from his friends from Gotham) or literally snap his teeth if he's startled.

But oh the lil robins would probably be so adorable. Very fluffy and downy and brightly colored in a clear warning, but still unsettling. The way they move isn't right, like a jerky contortionist, but can also go too fluid or completely inhumanely still within a heartbeat. Not helped by the fact they don't need to breathe. O h, the batfam could most definitely be venomous. What with how in both Aus they use paralytics and sedatives on their claws and spikes, It could definitely include that within the secondary bodies.

#what's out there au #possessed doll au #y'know what I think I might call this the Meat Marionette Au lol #Meat Marionette Au #Batman Au #Cryptid batman #Cryptid batfam #body horror #rambles #I like to think that if their gifted bodies are damaged too much It takes from their human bodies #Bruce wakes up with a spine of metal partially ripped into his back one day #Jason finds ones of his arms becoming rough & clawed like a bird's-the same one that was obliterated in the other body-#It means there's still stakes for the bodies & that they can't just tank everything #They're lucky that it's been things easy to hide so far but there's always that worry of *what if* in the back of their minds each battle #Thankfully it has to be like permanent damage to effect both of their bodies #like straight up maiming #Smaller injuries just mean horrible migraines or phantom pains depending on the type of wound & the severity #They might struggle with humanity slightly because they forget that normal humans can't make certain noises or hear that well #or that they can't *smell fear*#Gotham is both terrified of and loves the bats #The babies are adorable but the parent is terrifying & can unhinge its jaw and open up its ribs and *yeah*#But that's Gotham for you they suppose #Honestly also pondering Jarro because like his body shape is very different compared to a human lol #I do like to think that they all have bits of black veins across their bodies over their hearts and such #Honestly perhaps Alfred is more mentally effected than the others seeing as he's right on top of the cave all night #I'm just saying he also deserves a second body #Tumblr plz don't eat my tags thank you

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sluckythewizard · 4 months

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[PUT INTO PLACE, TIED DOWN AND ARRANGED, AND IS NEVER THE SAME, AGAIN.]<-listen to my favorite songs. VAMPIRES ARE WONDERFUL ARENT THEY. THE FLESH IS SO MUCH MORE DURABLE. SO MUCH STRETCHIER THAN HUMANS. THE STRESS DOESNT KILL A VAMPIRE THE SAME WAY IT DOES A HUMAN. YOU CAN TAKE THEM APART THREAD BY THREAD AND LEAVE THEM WIDE AWAKE WITHOUT WORRY OF THE BRAINMATTER SPOILING UNDER VINEGARY AGONY.

#cw gore #WEEEE WHIPPING OUT ALL MY BELOVED PIXEL HORROR GAME SOUNDTRACKS FOR THIS ONE #STILL A WIP #SORTA. FORKSFORKSFORKS INSPIRED ME TO START WORKIN AT IT AGAIN. AND NOW IT LIVES. IT LIIIVEESS!!!#MOSLT.Y ATLEAST. I MIGHT MESS W IT MORE LATER. WE SHALL SEE. ANYWAY GABRIEL MONTEZ HUH. WOW POOR GUY #THERES A FASCINATING FEELING THAT COMES WITH BEING ON A OPERATING TABLE.AND BEING IN IMMENSE PAIN #ONE OF MY FONDEST MEMORIES IS LAYING ON A DENTIST CHAIR. SHAKING AND INVOLUNTARILY CRYING AFTER MANY MANY #NEEDLES TO MY THE MOUTH. I METABOLIZE THE NUMBING STUFF QUICKLY APPARENTLY. THEY NEEDED ALOT OF NUMBING SHOTS #BUT I WASNT AFRAID OR DISTRESSED. THE DENTIST WAS VERYVERY NICE AND ALSO UH. PRETTY. BUT THATS BESIDE THE POINT #THE POINT IS. THAT IT WAS FASCINATING TO REALIZE MY PHYSICAL RESPONSE TO PAIN UNDER A CONTROLLED ENVIRONMENT #I DIDNT KNOW HOW EASY IT WAS TO SHAKE AND TO CRY PRYVIOUS TO THAT EXPERIENCE.MY DENTAL ADVENTURES CONTINUE #THEY CONTINUE TO HELP ME UNDERSTAND WHAT ITS LIKE FOR PAIN TO BOIL AWAY THE TIME. TO DISTORT THE PASSING HOURS AND CONSUME EVERY THOUGHT #DO YOU REMEMBER PAIN? THE MOST SEVERE PAIN IN YOUR LIFE? NOW WILL YOU IMAGINE RED LIGHTS? RED LIGHTS AND SHIFTING FIGURES #NOW WILL YOU IMAGINE PAIN UNRELENTING.PAIN WORLD SHATTERING.PAIN IMMORTAL.CAN YOU IMAGINE BEING PULLED APART #THE HUMAN MIND CAN ONLY WITHSTAND SO MUCH PAIN BEFORE IT SHUTS DOWN AND HIDES.IT NEEDS TO PROTECT ITSELF AFTERALL. PAIN CAN ALTER #PAIN SHIFTS THE CHEMISTY OF THE MIND OF THE FLESH OF THE SOUL. FOR HUMANS ATLEAST. BUT YOU ARE NO LONGER HUMAN #YOU CHOSE OTHERWISE DIDNT YOU BOY.BECAUSE YOU WANTED MORE.STATUS.POWER.APPROVAL.SECURITY.SAFET.Y.#OHHH YOU CAN WITHSTAND THE PAIN FOR THAT. FOR ALL THAT. YOU WERENT TOLD THERE WOULD BE PAIN BUT YOU KNOW WHAT YOU WERE PROMISED.#ITS ALL WORTH IT IN THE END. NOW LETS JUST HOPE SOME BLONDE TWERP DOESNT PROVE TO BE STRONGER THAN THE STRONGEST PEOPLE IN YOUR LIFE #LETS HOPE NO ONE FUCKS THIS UP. LETS HOPE NO ONE FUCKS THIS UP. I LOST MY TRAIN O THOUGHT #anyway dawww poorr gabeee that shit probably huuurrrrtttss but so much time has passed that your body got tired of screaming and squirming #why havnt you passed out yet? maybe you might as well have at this point. like sleeping with your eyes open and your nerves awake #OH HEY FUNFACT ABT THE ART. I FOUGHT W IT ALOT. TOOK A LONG WHILE FOR ME TO BE REMOTELY HAPPY W THIS.#i was thinking abt pixel horror video games when i made it.just as i do with all great things ofc ofc #i love you pixel horror game i love yooouuuuu.i struggled so much w the colors for so LONNGG UHGHGHGH but im finally happy...im finally fre

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ancha-aus · 5 months

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RealAgeAU Drabble - Gameplan

Hello! Another Drabble (second one i wrote) concerning the idea of Nightmare returning to his original form (Lovely Prompt idea by @spotaus )

First Drabble here Prev drabble here Next Drabble here

Warning, unedited and unbeta'ed. We die like my ability to spell anything.

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Cross checks around the corner towards the street and waits for a moment longer before nodding "I think we are in the clear. We can talk here for a moment."

Killer just lounges back against a dumpster as he pants "Good! Cuz! I am not walking another step!"

Horror frowns as he searches his backpack. Slowly taking out some fruits "We need to stop this. We can't get the resources we need like this."

Cross groans as he rubs his face "I know I know. But we can't just settle anywhere! How do we explain..." He stops and slowly turns to look to the side at Dust.

Dust sits completely calm on the gorund, cross legged. Looking perfectly calm and content. With the still struggling Nightmare in his arms. Dust just sits there and looks at Nightmare with a raised brow and moves around a bit. Easily getting Nightmare to sit back in his lap with one of Dust's arm holding Nightmare around the middle wiht both arms trapped. And the second arm around his shoulders to pull him back easily. Nightmare looks grumpy beyond believe and Cross can't take it too seriously as Nightmare lost all his goop and corruption. All that remains is a perfectly normal and adorable tiny babybones.

Cross turns back to Horror and Killer and waits.

Horror looks at the scene before shrugging before turning back to prepare a snack for their now tiny charge. Looking calm as he moves.

Killer snorts "Why would we? Boss is tiny now. So what?" and he shrugs.

Cross groans as he rubs his face. He can admit that he will still need some time to get used to the change. But it is okay as he can accept it. After they found the old picture book and the just as old crown they had been putting together what actually happened. And well, even if they sometimes act dumb three out of four of them have university degrees of some type and Cross had always been one of the smartest soldiers.

That together with the known fact that Drema broke out of the stone young but grew up made the fact obvious.

It wasn't that they were in a situation of Nightmare having been deaged. They were in the situation that the Nightmare they had known had been an aged-up version of the real nightmare. Which is the very same grumpy babybones that Dust is holding right now.

Yeah. Cross just needs a bit more time.

Cross glares at Killer and focusses at the issue they need to actually fix "We know that!" he waves around them "But how do you think anyone is going to react to knowing we have Nightmare and that Nightmare is well... like this again?"

Killer hums and nods "I guess..." he turns towards Nightmare "How about a different name? What do you think Nighty? What can we call you?"

Nightmare glares with all his six year old force "Boss."

Killer snorts "got it tiny boss!" and he grins at Cross and shrugs "Guess that idea is a burst. anything else?".

Cross groans as he rubs his skull "don't you see the issue?! If anyone finds out about this they will try to take him from us and bring him to the Stars, if they don't just call the Stars!" Or worse. And they will think that killing Nightmare would be a reasonable solution to keeping him from aging up.

Killer actually glares as he radiates his blood- and LOVE-lust "Let them try."

Cross sighs as he rubs his face "what do you suggest we do?!"

Killer huffs "Obviously we do what we are doing now. We keep moving and universe hopping." and he nods.

Horror looks up with a frown "We can't do that. We will run out of resources. babybones need nutrients" as he says this he sits by Dust and Nightmare with the cut fruits. Nightmare focuses his full glare on Horror but Horror doesn't even blink. They have gotten used to this routine over the last few days and there is a good reason Dust and Horror do it.

Dust nods as he helps Horror by aiming the still struggling babybones "Not to forget his schooling. Now that he is young again he will need to relearn things. Can't do that while hopping from place to place."

Cross turns back to Killer and crosses his arms "See? horror and Dust agree."

Killer grumbles. "Fine! We find some stupid positive universe to hunker down in some abandoned building and do raids to get stuff. Easy!"

Cross crosses his arms "Still the problem of what we do if someone sees him. How do we explain that? people will think we stole him!"

Killer goes to speak. pauses and tilts his skull "I mean. Technically we did kind of steal him. Sure he was originally our boss, so ours. So we have the right to steal him again but still. Very much stolen."

Cross sputters "I! I wasn't serious!" well he was but not about the stolen comment!

Horror speaks up even as he feeds Nightmare, which Ngihtmare tries to fight but Dust is there to assist him. "Technically it wasn't stealing."

Cross sighs "Thank you Horror-"

"We kidnaped him." Horror finishes his statement as he manages to get Nightmare to eat a bit. Nightmare actually pauses and the stubbornness makes way for the much younger mind that enjoys the food and a tiny soft purr starts to leave the babybones. He doesn't struggle as much anymore as the second bite is brought over.

Cross stops and lets his skull fall into his hands "we are so fucked."

All three speak up "Language."

Cross groans louder. They are so fucked.

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First Drabble here Prev drabble here Next Drabble here

#RealAgeAU #utmv #fanfic #drabble #deaged nightmare #bad sanses #That moment when your old boss gets transformed into a child so you forcefully adopt him instead #found family twice over lets go #What are the four to each other here?#maybe poly? maybe friends?#Somewhere in between?#Hell they don't even know. They just know they are struggling #Nightmare still has his memories.#But also his mind and body both returned to his real age which is six #without the extra powerups and with all the real fear and pain from his past abuse #He is not going to be an easy babybones #Do I need to tag all of them? Probably right?#I will just not do it for now. I am sure it is fine.#Yes also Nightmare is goopless and just Baby. Which is why he has been promoted (demoted) to babybones #Nightmare has a lot of large feelings now and can't process them all so he is also struggling #Not as much as his gang members though but still struggling

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ducktracy · 14 days

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time for another “THANK YOU I LOVE YOU” message: THANK YOU I LOVE YOU!!! i’ve been struggling with some severe burnout in all facets of my life as a result of being too stubborn and prideful to recognize said burnout and so i’ve had a hard few weeks with just that + tumultuous personal life stuff + blah blah blah, and wanted to say THANK YOU FOR YOUR SUPPORT! i’m giving a little rest from reviews and art (moreso the former) since i was really forcing myself to make ends meet and turning it into a chore and so i’m just kind of forcing myself to stop and rest and be a person. which is excruciatingly hard for a GO GO GO person like me so i just wanted to say thank you for your patience and understanding with that! and thank you for your support!!! i haven’t had the emotional bandwidth to answer asks or DMs lately but i promise i see them and am seriously grateful for everyone who has sent one in, i really want to share the love and get back on my feet and be more active and open and talkative since I LOVE INTERACTING WITH YOU GUYS!! so i just wanted to say thank you for your patience and support in spite of all that. i’m usually my worst enemy in terms of putting the most pressure under myself and buckling under it as a result, i know realistically nobody is sharpening their harpoon gun because i didn’t touch a review for a week. but i wanted to put out a message as a bit of peace of mind regardless 🙏 thank you for your support in any capacity and know that i am extremely grateful for it beyond words!

#just every single aspect of my life has become a chore and obligation and an unhappy one and i thought the solution to that was to force #through it and that is not the case! i hate feeling ‘lazy’ but my body was literally giving out and i still am busy with work obligations so #i can’t afford to have my hobbies and personal life causing that much pain #but rest assured the art and reviews and chatting will pick up! i love them too much to stop and refuse to! that’s why i’m in this scenario #but i just wanted to say thank you and give a bit of an explanation because i would keep agonizing otherwise lol #going through a bit of a transitional period and learning how to care for myself better so i can be more available for friends and acquain #tances. and that includes yinz! thank you for leaving asks and DMs and replies and reblogs i hope it never stops! i want to get more #equipped to answering them #thank you for being here :)

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calmlb · 8 months

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Soukoku Height Difference —Reference

for any fic writers or artists who need it, here’s a reference for skk’s height difference at 15, 16 (according to dead apple), & 22

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angelnumber27 · 3 months

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It’s so embarrassing and heartbreaking being in so much pain over losing someone while knowing they don’t give a fuck if you live or die. Your favorite person becoming a stranger is a special kind of hell.

#I fucking hate having bpd #while I’m at it I don’t understand the fuckin audacity some people have to say they love you and do horrible things to you #I feel so stupid #I feel so stupid for believing all the lies #but I was so in love and put him on such a pedestal that I just allowed it all.#thinking about someone constantly and grieving over them and knowing they’re perfectly fine and to them you don’t exist #I’m still in such a state of grief and I don’t understand why time hasn’t healed #it honestly feels like it’s gotten worse w time #I just torture myself but I can’t help it my brain wants me dead #it’s so painful I feel so fucking stupid #being abandoned with no closure by someone who’s your entire world #for someone they were unfaithful to you with multiple times (I don’t even know how many and dony want to know) immediately #like that was the plan all along #he took our cat hundreds of miles away and I don’t even know if he still has her or if she’s still alive and I miss her every day #I never loved someone like that and it feels like the heartbreak is actually physically killing me #i spent 1/5 of my entire life with him #I was my prettiest and had the best body at the time and I wasted it on someone who didn’t appreciate me #not wasted. it wasn’t wasted. we had some incredible times together #I’ll never be that beautiful again #and now idk what do so bc i can’t decide which is worse: being alone and isolating or loving deeply and ending up horribly hurt all over #it’s all just so upsetting.#and I feel so stupid for allowing it all #he knows more about me than anyone and he made me feel like he loved me so much sometimes and then did horrid things and it’s so fucked up #nobody read this I’m so embarrassed and horribly broken #it traumatized me so much there was so much abuse and pain idk if I’ll ever recover #I deserved it but it still hurts my heart #I was so mentally ill and sick I know it had to have been miserable to be around me #there are so many things only he understands and knows about me and I need to talk about them I j wanna b able to b there 4 each other #but that girl is so beyond insecure and controlling so. if I want to talk to who fuckin gets me I’m just fucked #why lead someone on like that for years knowing you’re going to abandon them the second it’s convenient

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deathdaydreamm · 8 months

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man I have had a fucking crazy week

#I got covid #I got fired from my job I think BECAUSE I got covid #I had to take a pregnancy test today because my period was 4 days late #and then GOT my period 5 minutes after taking said pregnancy test #now i’m in so much pain because i’ve been eating more so it’s twice as bad as usual #and now i’m on the couch electrocuting myself with a TENS unit #because I have NO more ibuprofen left #my whole body fucking hurts #and i’m still somehow in a good mood 😂

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triglycercule · 7 days

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horror having crazy irrational thoughts about food,,,,, like bro thinks there's poison in the cupcakes. someone snuck razor blades into the bread and once he takes a bit it'll cut him up. somehow there's mold growing inside the bananas and when he eats it the mold colony is gonna start growing on HIM and then he'll become a moldy skeleton and oh god and oh god and he is paranoid but hes so hungry.... BUT WHAY ABOUT BUGS IN THR FOOD,,,, BUT HES HUNGRY.... a struggle it truly is

probably doesnt help that dust and killer could feed into it. killer could make off hand remarks on how he snuck razor blades into the meat horror's attempting to eat (to fuck around with horror. just some eeeever so slight psychological anguish. and also because killer would just be the type of casually carry those around. what for you may ask well decide for yourself) and then immediately horror's mood drops and he storms out of the dining room. dust and horror go on a sweet little picnic in a beautiful field and its all beautiful and inconspicuous but dust made the food and horror knows that look in his eyes. horror knows dust was muttering something about chemicals a day or 2 ago. the food is poisoned isnt it??? and dust just smiles and motions for horror to eat it

#imagine being starved and then you hang out with two guys who make food dangerous #imagine the dread. the rational part of his mind telling him not to eat it but his instincts are so so so hungry #horror eats the food because it genuinely looks so good but he knows he just fucked up #they make eachother so SO worse........ they are SO bad for eachother its amazing #and horror probably can't cook all that well too so he definitely needs to learn which is a whole other struggle with his eating issues #MAKE THEM BREAK UP ALREADY THEY CAUSE TOO MUCH SUFFERING FOR EACH OTHER 💔💔💔#sorry triglycercule but no 🧡 they deserve to suffer together as retribution for everything they did #sometimes i feel like this angry torturous mtt that all hate eachother is a bit too ooc #but then again..... god is it so fun to come up with ideas for the mtt to hurt eachother #its so delicious 🧡 like dust's poisoned food! horror eats more because it tastes so good #but he can feel the poison kicking in. he can feel his body slowly start to ache and his movements slow as he eats more and more #and soon he can't move. he's paralyzed and in pain in this flower field with dust #and as he starts to pass out he reaches his hand out a bit for dust. just for the smallest bit of comfort #horror's absolutely furious at him for poisoning him but dust still holds his hand back #dust holds horror in his arms with a smile as they lay in the flower field enjoying the moment #as if you didn't just fucking poison the fuck but whatever that's horrordust for you!#dont worry horror gets him back by stealing papyrus's scarf and ripping some of it off to wear in front of dust #he sews a little patch of the scarf onto his jacket and dust is staring at that shit. that is a TAUNT #yeah this is papyrus's scarf. what are you gonna do about me ripping some of it huh? poison me AGAIN???#theyve all grown tolerances for different poisons because the mtt genuinely cannot stop trying to kill eachother #killer sans #dust sans #horror sans #murder time trio #tricule hc #god i struggle to differentiate because hc and rant so much because i swap around and change hcs so frequently that there isnt consistency #ive now decided that rants MUST be substantially longer and less put together to be a rant and not a hc. and that shall be DECREED #utmv #sans au

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moeblob · 6 months

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I literally ate One Thing today and my stomach has decided to rebel.

#witewawwy so tired of being sick #i feel mostly fine except for you know the excessive amounts of time ive spent hunched over clutching my tummy #i at least am not still in back pain which is what killed me yesterday #u ever take 4 showers in 1 day (yesterday) to try soothing the pains ?#u ever eat 1 meal in 1 day (today) and regret it for the next 8 hours?#ive tried so hard to be good and rest and FOR WHAT ! a still horty tummy #inhaling too much still hurts and im like please body this is a basic human function ? breathing? why hurt?

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nowritingonthewall · 1 year

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I’m just begging you: Don’t make us go there again.

#oscar isaac #moon knight #marc spector #moonknightedit #chrissie gifs #tw: trauma #tw: child abuse #It still blows my mind how the people involved in this show seemed to have a better understanding of trauma #than most professional therapists do #It's so heartbreaking to see how you can literally see Marc being stuck in his freeze reaction #While Steven moves around and explores #Marc's feet are rooted to the spot #He doesn't get a word out and he is clearly struggling to breathe #He can't even move his body towards the threat (i.e. his mother banging against the door) so he mostly just moves his eyes #Until the door bursts open and Marc's flight mode is activated #There is so much evidence that talking about your trauma again and again does nothing to integrate it and heal from it #And Harrow is such a text book example of so called health care professionals that force their patients to be re-traumatized again and again #Marc literally shows Steven how he suffered the most horrible and painful injuries to his soul #And it neither helps him to integrate his trauma nor to balance the scales #The healing process only starts when he allows himself to start learning to be accepted and taken care of by Steven #I am sorry I just love him so much 🥺

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alluralater · 4 months

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hey everyone, i won’t be as active for a while. got home last night super late after being on the road for 20 some odd hours. dealing with some family things and as an older sister, my priority of taking care of my siblings comes first before anything else. being on here is amazing for me but i don’t think i’ll have much time for it. reminder to please treat those in your life who are battling addiction with patience and care. i lost my older brother (sweetest person i’ve ever known and he remained that way up until his last night) to suicide and alcoholism, trauma and ptsd, depression and his feelings of hopelessness. talk with the people you care about. another of my siblings is dealing with the same and i refuse to let it escalate to such a terrifying end twice in less than a fucking year. remind the people you care about that there are beautiful things to live for. show them kindness and love. there is all kinds of misinformation out there but know this, you can make a difference for someone. don’t let them suffer in silence.

#if you have me on snap then you saw the super gorgeous views and such on my way to idaho but what you did not see was me picking #up my little sister. propping her body up with pillows in a hotel room to make sure she didn’t aspirate on her own vomit in her sleep.#pouring out her water bottle of white claw and talking to her about drug use.#i never make her feel as though she has disappointed me or that she should feel ashamed. shame helps nothing. love helps everything.#i’m going to get her back into treatment soon- i just need her to know she has a home when she’s out. detoxing here first and being #positively reinforced for every single step of the process is so fucking important. it was terrifying to learn that if i had not gone to ge #her when i did that she probably would have died there in the next few weeks.#my fear of death for her is not what guides me though and there’s a huge difference between that and doing something out of love. being #there in dire moments is important yes- but being there through the mundanity of recovery is JUST as vital. it’s a process and it’s hard.#she’s moving in with me for awhile so i can help her through this sensitive time in her recovery.#she’s trying so hard and being recognized for that has literally been making her sob. knowing she has people who truly care for her is #everything. now that my stepdad is away from her like across the country i can actually finally help her. she’s starting to understand and #without me saying anything- she is starting to see what he’s done to her and our family. she needs love and support and stability. she need #reasons to live. sorry im kinda rambling a lot in these tags but i just… i can’t lose another one. the love i carry for my siblings is #unlike any other. i’ve treated them like my children since i was a child and those are my own issues but our mother is gone now too so it i #up to me.#losing my brother last september and my mom the year before that- grief has just been back to back.#in the hotel room i couldn’t sleep. she fell asleep so quickly and all i could do was watch her and think about all of the things i want to #do to make her feel like her life has value and worth enough to stay here and not go. my little sister is forever four years old in my mind #yes she’s an adult of 23 but she is a baby to me. she’s so young and she has so much ahead of her. she deserves a happy and fulfilled life.#our lives have been… very hard. 4 out of 5 of us are still standing and i plan on keeping it that way.#this is not the pain olympics or whatever but listen- if i put an adult in any of the situations we were in as children they would not #survive. we only did because there was no other choice. now there are escapes and we are old enough to try them all- every single one of us #has searched for some escape. it spirals and escalates and it doesn’t help but it is an escape. giving her love and affection and getting #her the help she needs and doing it the RIGHT way- it lessens the need for escape. there is nothing wrong with being an addict.#addiction ends one of two ways. life or death. unfortunately there is no in between. she’s going to feel everything- bad and good. i want #her to know there is so much good. that she is good. every move i make right now matters so i don’t think i’ll have time for tumblr or #much socializing.#just a heads up yk. thank you for your patience in advance <3

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opens-up-4-nobody · 7 months

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#i walked into a situation today where my mom was effectively already dead. effectively bc her body was and is still alive. still breathing #painful groaning purrs. but her mind was gone yesterday. my dad said he showed her a picture of the mountains i took that day and told her #i loved her and she smiled. thats what he said. maybe he was just being nice. or maybe thats the last time she thought of me. i dunno. but #the human body is an incredible thing. shes got a heart still powering a broken body. too full of tumors to function anymore. stomach #streched like a pregnant mother. it happed really fast and now its happening very slow #im somehow probably better off than the rest of them. i only got here for the aftermath of a downslide. my daily life will b least effected #i only really saw her twice a year living so far away and she didnt text much. didnt call often. so life wont change much ill just kno shes #not there. which is sad. but theres nothing to b done abt it. life goes on. it hasnt been all bad tho. its nice to talk to my family abt her #how incredible she was. bc she was. wish her mom wasnt here tho. she doesn't deserve to b here. my mom wouldnt want her here. she didnt want #her here. but anyway. i wish her body would just let her go now. so we can sleep. so this can be over. so she can rest #but even like this shes stubborn and resilient. they say it could go on for days but i hope not. may the universe let her rest shes gotta b #so tired after 10 years of this. but i have no regrets. she knew how i felt abt her. and i dont think she had regrets either. she did so #much up to the very end. went out on a high note without the burdon of knowing it was coming #i dunno. its just such a strange experience to watch the empty shell of your mother sleeping like a gurgling baby #unrelated

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