#but he HATES acknowledging it and it drives a wedge between you. he loves you. but he feels stuck to say it out loud. in front of ppl.

[togamest]

barou seeing you upset and even though he feels weak doing so he pulls you into a hug, a warm, all encompassing embrace. his kiss is soft, and his eyes match his touch as he looks at you with stars in his eyes. “i love you,” he whispers, “and i don’t seem to wanna care who knows it.”

[rosys-fans-fics]

How Gortash reacts to Durge’s new lover Part 2

Part 1 here!

Thanks to @rainbow-spinelli13 for requesting this!

Halsin

Gortash is really taken aback by this big, tree hugging, bear standing right behind you. This is what attracted The Chosen of Bhaal? Gortash gets the physical attraction, he wouldn’t mind climbing Mount Halsin himself. But he never expected his love to fall for someone so devoted to nature.

Halsin’s physical attractiveness is the only good quality of his, on every other front, him and Gortash clash. Gortash loves engineering and advancing technology while Halsin loves nature and traditional hobbies. Gortash sees himself as the greatest having never done any wrong while Halsin is always second guessing his choices.

But more than a personality clash, Halsin makes Enver feel something he hates feeling, insecure. Halsin is so much bigger, more experienced, and doesn’t have a clear flaw for him to exploit.

Gortash hates feeling less than someone, his whole climb to Archduke was to feel above everyone else. Only to have someone come in who has taken the most important person from him. He hates it.

Halsin isn’t keen on Gortash and will advice you against reconnecting with him. This tips Gortash over the edge and gives him the push to get Halsin out of the picture. If he can’t be better than Halsin, then he’ll make sure the only thing he’s competing with is a corpse.

Part of Gortash wants to believe that you chose Halsin because he reminded you of himself. A strong leader giving his all but he doubts that’s the reason.

Karlach

Gortash has to laugh at the dramatic irony of your pairing. His former body guard not only fighting along side his nearest and dearest but becoming your lover? He has to laugh at it.

That amusement quickly turns to anger once he realizes that neither of you are grateful for what he did for Karlach. He took an up and coming youth and gave her the opportunity to truly become powerful. And you not realizing that just shows how far you’ve fallen.

Gortash would reveal that you actually agreed to send Karlach to Zariel 10 years ago because you thought she couldn’t protect him. He’d even exaggerate to drive a wedge between you two.

Gortash likes to think that you fell for Karlach because you missed how he protected you. Perhaps you saw him in a similar light and subconsciously craved to be with someone strong again. It’s just a shame that you chose Karlach.

He’s willing to let you both back into his life but only if you and Karlach acknowledge how great he’s been for both of you.

Lae’zel

Lae’zel reminds Gortash of what you were like before disappearing. Blunt, murderous, and singleminded in her goals. Gortash is disappointed that you chose someone similar to yourself instead of him but beggars can’t be choosers.

Lae’zel’s intense loyalty to the Gith is something Gortash believes he can manipulate. Perhaps he can turn that loyalty toward himself and Bane? Or he may find a way to get her out of your life.

If you and Lae’zel get the Orphic hammer by killing Raphael and then kill the Emepror? Gortash is more than ready to welcome Lae’zel in as the third wheel. She may never be as beloved as his favorite but she does have a certain charm to her. Killing an abusive father figure is probably the hottest thing only could do.

Gortash is not threatened by Lae’zel being your new lover. Of course you are with her because she reminds you of your old self! And the sooner you become your old self, the happier Gortash will be.

Any pushback Lae’zel tries to use will be seen more as a toddler throwing a fit that their favorite toy is being taken away rather than a serious issue. She should be honored to view this match of two chosen above everyone and only equal to eachother.

Shadowheart

Shadowheart is another person Gortash feels jealous of. To have parents that love you so much to go through decades of torture? Even willing to sacrifice themselves for her freedom? That’s something Gortash wants so deeply that he’s willing to tadpole his parents so they’ll say they’re proud of him.

Gortash also sees his life mirrored in Shadowheart’s. They both were taken by an evil servant working for a higher power, they were tortured, but Gortash escaped and chose his own god. Perhaps he would offer support for Shadowheart breaking away from Shar if you asked him to. She could make a loyal banite in her search for a new deity.

Or he’d give Viconia all the support she needs to take Shadowheart out of your life.

Gortash is fine with you keeping Shadowheart as a side thing. She can be pushed away and persuaded to back down, Gortash just needs the right thing to hold over her head.

Shadowheart’s openness to polyamory definitely wins her some favor in Gortash’s book as she can be convinced to let your old relationship flourish again.

Gortash sees Shadowheart as someone he can control. He knows the weaknesses she faces with her parents and is willing to exploit that. While envious of her parents devotion to her, he takes some solace in knowing it was her who hurt them.

Minthara

Minthara is similar to Gortash, both are ruthless, ambitious, and devoted to their goals. You missed him so much so you found someone who matches his drive. He’ll show you who has the highest goals and who will bring you to such great heights.

Minthara could make a good Banite. Gortash is willing to welcome her back into the absolute fold but with the curtain pulled back. Instead of following a false god, she can follow Bane and Bane’s chosen.

Minthara’s biting remarks and intelligent quips are greatly appreciated by Gortash. She can keep up with his and yours conversations.

But the deal breaker is Minthara’s intense possessiveness over you. Gortash is almost offended on your behalf for someone thinking the could limit your life. Enver would never try to limit your exploration, as long as you always came back to him.

If you truly want to keep Minthara, Gortash will get her to change her mind. Obviously the elder brain will need to be under his control, but once it’s is, everything can go back to normal.

[antianakin]

Hello, I like to share this quote said by Jedi Bob in the last Lego Series which really illustrates the light and dark side, giving my opinion after that.

"The dark side is loud and obvious like a big, mean Gamorrean kicking you in the head over and over. But the light side, the light side of the Force is just a whisper in the back of your mind."

In my opinion, Jedi Bob's quote really shows about how violent and visceral the dark side could be to the person who hears it, against the gentleness of the light side but harder to hear if you don't feel balanced enough. Something that the Jedi could understand. Ignoring the loud and brutal darkness and let the light to comfort and guide them. And it's up to each person to decide which sound to follow. What do you think about this quote?

I don't hate it, I can kind-of see what it's getting at here, but it's not quite how I see the Force working.

I also don't really love "the light side" as a thing, it didn't used to exist in Star Wars at all when Lucas was in charge, and I think it's confused some of what the worldbuilding of Star Wars actually is. Balance and "the light side" are, in effect, the exact same thing. So I don't think that "the light side" LEADS to balance, that's not how it works. Darkness is a thing and it's always there, in everyone and everything, but balance isn't "light," it's just choosing to acknowledge darkness and reject it. That's what balance IS.

So I don't see "the light side" as a whisper, because balance is a CHOICE, it's active. Things happen to you that are outside of your control, but how you choose to react to them is up to you. Your ability to remain balanced and reject darkness in yourself will always have to be your own choice to make. Balance is about standing firm on the stormiest seas or planting your feet against the strongest winds. That's not a whisper at all, that's a very strong, loud, intentional choice that you make in the face of everyone and everything trying to tear you down.

Balance is Obi-Wan living through the death and destruction of everyone and everything he knows and loves and remaining kind and compassionate afterwards. Balance is living in isolation in the desert for twenty years and surviving on pure hope and faith in a better future.

Whereas darkness can often creep up on you. It's temptation. It's that little whisper in your head that tells you that it's okay to let yourself be selfish just this once, it's the voice that convinces you that you're doing the right thing even if it hurts people. Darkness is the desire for just one more every time.

Darkness is Palpatine quietly dripping poison into Anakin's ears for a decade, slowly driving a wedge between Anakin and the Jedi, eroding Anakin's compassion bit by bit and encouraging his selfish tendencies, convincing him each time that it was for the best no matter what the consequences were and surely doing it just once more couldn't hurt.

As Yoda tells Luke, using the dark side is easier and faster, but it is NOT stronger than using the Force the way it's intended to be used. Using the dark side is like building a house that isn't up to safety codes and so the first time a storm hits, everything falls apart. You got a house a lot faster and with a lot less effort, sure, but it was pretty weak in the long run and now you don't have a house anymore. Whereas if you'd taken the time to give the house a strong foundation and put the energy into making it safe, it would've stayed standing during that storm. Maybe it would've taken a little damage, but it wouldn't be GONE.

This metaphor seems to be more about what darkness and balance look like from the OUTSIDE, perhaps, but not the reality of them. The dark side (and the people who use it) can maybe look big and strong and loud, while balance (and those who achieve it) is perhaps less obvious and seems weaker because it doesn't always show immediate results. But the reality is, in fact, the exact opposite. Darkness doesn't just come in and kick you in the head once and now you're a bad guy; it comes up slowly day by day, choice by choice, until everything you used to be, everything you once loved, is gone. And balance might not give immediate results and it might seem weaker at the beginning, but it will stand the test of time and hold firm against whatever tries to break it down.

[fujii-draws]

Just found and read your chatot rant and I'm curious. How would you rewrite him to be a more understandable/likable character?

Anon you are the light at the end of the tunnel.

I wouldn’t change a whole lot about him. Personality wise I think he’s funny/well-rounded. It’s more of how many times they made him do needlessly cruel stuff to h/p that’s never addressed again.

I say, let Apple woods stay the same. Like I said before in my rant, I enjoyed the conflict there. My problem only stems from the fact that??? He doesn’t have any real reason to distrust them???

Give him a reason. Show that h/p were fucking up a lot of jobs when they first joined the guild- and chatot (begrudgingly) took their excuses because they’re new. And he gives them a lot of chances despite his callous demeanor.

THEN, let the incident in Apple woods be the moment where he finally decides those two had enough second chances. And doesn’t hear them out. And other than that I’m alright w/ chapter 6.

NOW… CHAPTER 17…

Ughhhhh man. I already made my grievances known with this chapter but I genuinely hated how they handled chatot here. Will start off by saying (again), I LIKE that he’s distrustful about majority of what partner said. The future, Grovyle being good, The “magical hidden land”, etc. IT MAKES SENSE LMAO. ITS SO OUT THERE.

What pissed me off was how he immediately tried to play off that he trusted them the whoooole time. And it’s called out as a JOKE. And never addressed again. I’d do either 2 things here.

1. Let Chatot actually test the guild’s trust in h/p.

Do you know how awesome it would’ve been to have him IMPROVE from Apple woods? Have the entire guild that once had your back— now distrusting our main duo? And have CHATOT be the one to actually stand up for them there???? And HE be the one to point out Dusknoir grabbed those two in broad daylight? (Further emphasizing him as Wigglytuff’s right hand man(bird) and how much more competent he is than his pink leader? LIKE MAN THAT WOULDVE INSTANTLY REKINDLED MY LOVE FOR HIM. But what we got in main game was so much more disappointing.

2. Chatot doubling down on what he said.

Okay this MAY sound weird but hear me out. Having chatot still be distrustful until Brine cave would’ve, in my opinion, also been EONS better than him going “oh lol I trust them hehehe!!!!! I’m so silly!!!!” <<(accused two Pokémon they lied about the traumatic ass experience they went through.)

Have him still not trust a word they said. And that in turn comes with some actual consequence. (Like Wigglytuff being upset/disappointed in him and it driving a wedge between the two until Brine cave) Have him suffer some kind of consequence. Not some off screen rant he had w/ Team skull. Not some random sacrifice that’s disconnected with the stuff he done. A consequence that actually makes him realize “wait am i being an ass” before he continues to double down.

(I’m a sucker for characters doing bad things as long as they get consequences or try to make up for it.) (doesn’t have to be both at the same time.)

AAAND THATS PRETTYYY MUCH IT! I love Post-Game chatot a whole bunch and If I’m being honest???? I still like Chatot when he’s not being a colossal jackass.

I love that he’s stressed and snippy. I love that he’s trying his damn hardest to keep the guild running. I love that when h/p fail the graduation fight— he’s the one smiling towards them like a little shit. I love that he regards h/p in a positive light and acknowledges the good they did for the guild in the rare few moments he’s being honest with them.

It’s why I liked him at the start and near the end. The middle was just waaay too rocky for me. But on my replay of the game I’ll try to keep an open mind for the bird. I wanna give him a chance.

[rynnthefangirl]

Thinking of 12 year old Daemon Waters. Raised in the Red Keep with the stain of bastardy, amongst the nobles but not truly one of them, never one of them. Being of the same age as the Princes, trained by the same Master at Arms, and Daemon is better, but that doesn’t matter because they are true born and he is just a bastard. Wondering for years who his father is, feeling that empty spot in his life, fantasizing about his dad one day coming to claim him as his own and return to his and his mothers lives.

Then he wins a squires tourney, and his fantasy comes true. His father is not just anyone— he is the King of Westeros. And Daemon is acknowledged by his father in front of all the lords of the realm. Personally knighted by the King himself— his dad— and given their family’s ancestral sword— an act that tells young Daemon “you belong here. You are my son and I’m proud of you.”

But the sword wasn’t given out of love, it was given out of hate. Just another in a long line of spiteful insults from an evil abusive monster to his own wife and son. Aegon gives that sword to his bastard son, and Daeron looks on bitterly, because he understands the message that is really being sent, not to Daemon but to him: “you are nothing. You are no son of mine, and I will make you hurt.” And this one moment will set up so much suffering, driving a wedge between two brothers and ultimately causing 80 years of violent rebellion, death and destruction.

But Daemon doesn’t know any of that. Because he’s just a 12 year old bastard boy whose dreams of having a father that loves him have finally come true.

[zephrunsimperium]

is Knowing Me, Knowing You a romantic billford story? what kind of story is it, actually? it looks interesting but I’m afraid to read any type of billford in fear of it being… not the best. what do you think of the ship, actually, since you’re such a fidduathor fan? also, does it end okay, even when incomplete? I have a lot of questions about the fic tbh. too scared to read it tho lol

Whooooo boy do I have a lot to say about this... I highly encourage everyone to read this entire post.

So, my thoughts on BillFord are extremely complicated. I am, first and foremost, a FiddAuthor shipper. That is the ship I consider canon and I even headcanon Bill to be aroace and actively encourage Ford and Fidds to get together because Ford needs to get over stupid societal homophobia plus it's fun to wear down the human's moral compass about hitting on a married man.

BillFord is a FASCINATING concept and it's not hard to see why the ship is as popular as it is despite the (well-deserved) stigma; a lot of things between them that can be read as fuel to the shipping fire. (ie the hair ruffles, the nose flick, the nicknames, the gold statue, the piano serenade, Ford being attracted to the strange, Bill offering to make Ford "one of us," even the possibly kinky undertones of glowy blue chains and bodily possession)

But the problem is that the ship can get very nasty very fast. Make no mistake, what Bill does to Ford is abuse. He is manipulative and violent and cruel. "Mystery bruises?" Literally torturing Ford on screen? Driving a wedge between Ford and his support system to the point that he has extreme trouble trusting people? Preying upon Ford's insecurities about being a freak? That is horrifying stuff, in particular because of how clear the parallels are to real world abuse.

With that in mind, let me talk about KMKY. I loved this fic to pieces. It’s written and organized incredibly well with a good mix of humor, sentiment, tragedy, and villainy without ever feeling off-balance tonally. The best thing about this fic, however, is the mature and nuanced themes about abuse: how hard it is to still love your abuser even when you start realizing that they're as bad as they are, accepting that you're a victim and have no reason to apologize, how an abuser's own trauma isn't an excuse for their actions. I really appreciate that the author has sympathy for Bill while still clearly acknowledging that "hey, what Bill did to Ford was abuse and Ford doesn't have to forgive him, much less take him back." A lesser writer would force Bill and Ford together, but that's not what happens because it's not what should happen.

So, for anyone who is interested in reading it... The gist of it is that instead of inviting Fiddleford to work on the portal, Ford makes a body for Bill to assist in person. The first 33 chapters develop their relationship (ft. Fiddleford being confused and stressed) and then Ford finds out Bill has been lying and eventually goes through the portal. It is very much a romance but the writing is so good that there are times when it's genuinely heartbreaking that the two of them won't work out.

I would definitely say that Bill is the main character (even though Ford has a significant amount of viewpoint time and he's the one you're supposed to root for) because he's the one who changes throughout the story. It's not a positive change, but it is an extremely compelling character arc. The characterization of Bill in this fic is particularly cool to me because he’s definitely a complete person, but he’s very clearly inhuman.

A little preview/incentive to read it: all of Bill’s underlings have individual personalities, Jheselbraum is a super important character and her characterization is... really cool (that's not a good description, but I was in love with it), the worldbuilding of all the places Ford visits in the multiverse was really cool and fun, there are great OCs like Wendy's mom, this mob boss guy that is a delight to hate, and a sarcastic kick-ass alien lady, Bill's backstory is really impactful, Pyronica is a bad bitch, Bill and Ford fight zombies while We Go Together from Grease plays in the background, there are cool themes about enjoying the mundane things in life and how society treats the Strange, and well-written humor that had me laughing out loud constantly. For as long as it is, all of it was extremely memorable and hardly any of it felt like filler. (I will warn you if you choose to read it, there is some serious steam.)

As for the ending... I totally understand why the author stopped writing it. They were trying to make it canon-compliant, but by the time it caught up to the show it was very clear that adhering to the canon material was holding them back. They did their best, but I could tell they weren't enjoying writing it and if you're not enjoying your art, then I don't think it's worth doing.

Wow that was a long post. Thanks so much for the ask, Anon! I hope this was a satisfying response!

[aurora-313]

Zangetsu for the ask meme (Either)

Zangetsu

How I feel about this character: Chaotic gremlin who would've gotten on with early series Ichigo like a house on fire, totally being each other's worst (best! :D ) enablers. But in reality, done so completely dirty. You finally get the recognition, love and affection that you're rightly owed as your master's blade... but with the caveat you now have to permanently live with the gaslighting parasitic asshole who drive that wedge between you and your master in the first place. What a cold slap in the face.

All the people I ship romantically with this character: Sode No Shirayuki.

My non-romantic OTP for this character: Ichigo.

My unpopular opinion about this character Don't really have one? I guess I was disappointed/irritated at the reveal at the time when the manga was released week to week (hand in hand with my distain of Ichigo being a Quincy) but its grown on me.

One thing I wish would happen / had happened with this character in canon. Could he get a fucking apology from Ichigo please?! Or a proper onscreen reconciliation where they speak or anything that showed his opinion about his new living situation? Acknowledgement that what the Yhwach fragment did to him was deeply fucked up?

Yhwach fragment:

How I feel about this character Lying parasitic bastard who gaslit and manipulated Ichigo into hating his own soul for years on end. 99% sure he's the mechanism of Auswählen. Also the reason why I consider 'The Blade Is Me' to be bullshit.

All the people I ship romantically with this character: None.

My non-romantic OTP for this character: None.

My unpopular opinion about this character I don't see him as part of Ichigo. I see him as a foreign parasite, the blood curse Yhwach perpetuated among the Quincy to ensure all their powers return to him upon their death (or his whims). He should've followed through on his intended purpose of killing Ichigo and been expelled, destroyed by Zangetsu acting in Ichigo's defence, cementing the point of Zangetsu forever being Ichigo's true protector. While forever freeing Ichigo from having his powers sapped by Auswahlen, making him the first Quincy in eons to be freed from under Yhwach's thumb.

One thing I wish would happen / had happened with this character in canon. Contradictory to that above - I don't think he should've been a Quincy at all. My personal distain for Ichigo's quincy heritage aside, I think he should've been the manifestation of Ichigo's pure logic and strategic thinking. When Ichigo went through the shattered shaft, his zanpakutou suffered that too, making it just as unstable as Ichigo was until he managed to pull the Shinigami powers out. As for why its a middle-aged man, its as if Ichigo's own soul is going 'oh... oh shit, yeah, get this kid a decent parental figure. With White Zangetsu being Ichigo's pure instincts and blood lust, only when accepting the two together would Ichigo fully recover his true zanpakutou spirit. Aka the Arrancarified Tensa Zangetsu we see in the dangai.

[melodiousramblings]

honestly, what are the writers even thinking? even if they make adrien learn it in the next season, it still doesn't change the fact that the way they treated him in this season frankly sucked. he should have been there and faced things and faced gabriel when the plot was happening. the show gave it all to marinette's character as if gabriel isn't literally adrien's father. you can make marinette The Hero of the story while still acknowledging Adrien's importance and give him the moments he deserves. what a crappy writing and lacks emotional tone.

What sucks even more is that Adrien was already starting to see that Gabriel was not that good of a father. He was starting to realize that the way he’d been treated was wrong and hurtful. He called Gabriel out on it in Revolution while he was crying in the car. He really told Gabriel that Emilie wouldn’t have wanted this, she would’ve wanted Adrien to be happy and what Gabriel was doing was hurting him instead.

And then in Representation, omg, the way he called out Nightormentor while fighting him as Chat Noir, like really calling him out as a bad father while beating his ass doing it?? What happened to all of that??? I don’t- *frustrated groan*

The only thing I can think of, now that the finale has had some time to marinate in my mind and I’ve seen posts from other people who were upset over this part, is that Adrien’s reaction is from his trauma. He still loved his father, no matter how badly he treated him. Suddenly losing someone, even if they hurt you, would probably make the “good” things they did suddenly stand out. This is made even worse because Ladybug told Adrien that Gabriel sacrificed himself to defeat Hawkmoth, painting him as a hero. So of course Adrien is going to focus on that and on the rare occasions where Gabriel might have been somewhat of a “decent” father. Because now he’s suddenly gone and Adrien hasn’t had the time to process the trauma.

But once the euphoria of Hawkmoth’s defeat dies and things settle down and Adrien’s had some time to sort out recent events and remember all the ways Gabriel wasn’t a good father, maybe he’ll start to see things differently???

OR… The writers did leave with this juicy plot thread: Lila knows a lot, especially that Marinette is Ladybug, and Lila HATES both of them. I can see her using all her knowledge to try to drive a massive wedge between Marinette and Adrien. Maybe she’ll tell Adrien the truth. Maybe she’ll tell him that Marinette is hiding secrets from him. Maybe I’m being too hopeful. Idk. I guess we’ll see.

I’m still pretty upset about it though. The whole “seeing your abuser as a hero” really really rubs me the wrong way. Oopps, this post got long…

On a side note, wouldn’t Chat Noir ask Ladybug who Hawkmoth was??? Surely he would be curious. And sure, Ladybug wouldn’t say it was Gabriel because the whole city thinks he’s a hero. But she would have to tell him something right? Unless we end up getting LadyNoir conflict 2.0…

[chuthulhu-reads]

[ID: Three panels from Fruits Basket. In the first, Akito, as a child, is looking down and saying, "I'm not the one Father loved the most. I'm--" The second panel is empty except for a speech bubble of someone saying "No." In the third panel, the head maid of the Sohma family, in black mourning clothes and holding a formal kind of gift box, says, "Akira-san loved you more than anyone, Akito-san. You must not be confused." End ID.]

God, This Bitch. I hate This Bitch so much. Like I'm sure there are reasons she turned out like this and it's kinda sad that she seems to have no identity or goals for her life outside of Serving The Sohma Family Head, but she's also the living manifestation of all the Sohma clan's regressive toxicity. Right here, she's preaching this awful zero-sum approach to love and relationships that colours so much of Akito's relationships with the Zodiac members; they must love her the most, not just more than others but to the exclusion of others. Her most violent outbursts are all against family members seeking permission to be in a romantic relationships, because that's the biggest threat to their love with her. Love has to be obsession for her, or it's not love, which ironically is also very similar to Ren's approach to her love for Akira.

I mean, we all know someone like This Bitch, don't we? The administrator or secretary or PTA member who isn't technically in charge, but actually is because they're the one that Gets Things Done. The person whose identity is built on not necessarily being significant in their own right, but making themselves indispensable to who they perceive as significant and tripping on the power that comes with that. This Bitch is one of the most powerful individuals in the Sohma family and entirely flexes that power to show off How Important The Sohma Head (and by extension, she) Is. She's so busy going on about How Important And Special the arranged marriage for Akira must be that she doesn't notice or care that the guy is so painfully lonely and frightened of his approaching death that he doesn't actually care about anything beyond being noticed and cared for. Ren consists almost entirely of red flags, but she's the only person who actually noticed or gave a shit about Akira's actual emotional stat, and instead of acknowledging that, This Bitch and her cadre were so hung up on Ren Getting Notions Above Her Station and treating her like shit about it that it just exacerbated all of Ren's existing instability. This Bitch is so hung up on hating Ren that right here she's actively driving a wedge between a grieving child and her mother, and who the hell can stop her? She only answers to the head of the family, an already very damaged child who is very susceptible to her opinions. She teaches this child that rules don't apply to her, that her word is law, that she's literally god, and takes part in punishing those who defy Akito or covering up what Akito does to them, and I wonder if she's even self-aware enough to know how much she's flexing her own power in doing it. She gets to order around members of the family that she supposedly serves because of the position of influence she holds. It's so toxic and frustrating and makes her easily one of the most hateable characters in the series.

[bllsbailey]

The Idea of Changing Your Mind Confuses Democrats

Ever change your mind on anything or anyone? I bet you have. Do you know why I’d bet that way? Because you’re a human being, which makes you capable of all sorts of amazing things, especially the ability to learn new things and adapt to that knowledge. OK, maybe not ALL human beings have that skill – I’d tell Democrats to change their minds, but they shouldn’t work without tools – but those with an IQ larger than their hat size certainly can. This is why so many in the media seem to be confused by the idea that some people have changed their minds about Donald Trump.

Just after high school, my then-best friend met another friend in college who started hanging around our group. God, I hated that guy. It wasn’t jealousy; he was a jerk, and I had no interest in being around him. But he kept coming around the jerk, and eventually, I realized something: not that he wasn’t a jerk (we were all kinds of jerks), but that he was my kind of a jerk. 

We became great friends once we got past that initial couple of months (and it was quite a while) of disliking each other. He was at my wedding, and I spoke to him more frequently than the other guy. Life is weird that way, isn’t it?

I remember that every time I see some “news” outlet reporting about what someone who endorses him now called Donald Trump in the past. People grow up, people change, and people see results they did not expect or even think possible and adapt to that reality. Again, by people, I mean people who aren’t committed, ideological, progressive leftist Democrats. While they are technically people, they are like stalkers who are convinced Taylor Swift is sending them secret messages to notice, let alone acknowledge, the failures of their beliefs or actions. 

Republican Vice-Presidential nominee JD Vance wasn’t always a fan of Donald Trump’s. Vance, in the 2016 race when he was just a best-selling author and venture capitalist, said some really harsh things about Trump. So had I. So did just about everyone I know in politics, both famous and not. Why wouldn’t we have?

All anyone knew about Trump was what he said on the campaign trail, his TV show, and what we’d read in the newspapers for decades. His core philosophy didn’t seem very core, as he was on whatever side of whatever was happening at any given moment. He didn’t need to be consistent as he didn’t operate in the world of politics, just around the edges.

You’d see his pictures with Ronald Reagan and the Clintons. They took their picture with him for the same reason he took his picture with them: they were famous. Nothing was more profound than what rich and famous people do.

Then, Trump was elected President. In that job, he exceeded almost everyone’s expectations (I know Ann Coulter’s weren’t, but just about everyone else). That’s not to say Trump Derangement Syndrome didn’t have its casualties – some people never came around, no matter how many of their sworn life priorities Trump actually implemented. These Humpty Dumpties will spend forever shattering themselves into ever smaller pieces, unable to admit what is right in front of them.

Everyone else has opened their eyes. 

That won’t, however, stop the left from trying to drive a wedge between people on the right over Trump. “Tucker Carlson Hails Trump as ‘Bravest Man’ in RNC Speech After Telling Staffer, ‘I Hate Him Passionately,’” screams one headline. Another reads, “Elon Musk Called Trump a ‘Stone-Cold Loser,’ According to NYT Report on Billionaire’s Rocky Relationship With Ex-President.” Now, both endorse him. What does that mean? (BTW, I know Tucker, and that’s just how he talks/texts. It’s how most people do; no one interesting is nuanced in texts. As for Musk, I don’t know him, though I would love to – hit me up, E – but I have read the Walter Isaacson book on him a couple of times and he changes his mind when new facts present themselves. It’s how he’s gotten to space and how he’ll get to Mars.)

Well, the negative quotes are from years ago, which means Tucker and Elon have had new information to digest, digested it and have come to different conclusions. Or, even though they still hold their prior beliefs, they’ve seen Joe Biden and the Democrats in action and recognize how much better Trump is by comparison. Either way, they’ve changed their opinion. 

It’s a sign of intelligence to take in new facts and circumstances and adapt your thinking, it’s why no one on MSNBC has ever done it. OK, they have changed in that they’ve gone from “Trump is Hitler” to “Trump is Mecha-Hitler” to “Trump is Super-Mecha-Hitler,” but self-affirmation is not what I’m talking about. 

Human beings, intelligent ones, admit when they’re wrong and learn from it. How stupid would you be if you held fast to everything you thought when you were 20? I’d be a dope-smoking moron, likely with a rotten liver, and would not have one of my best friends. If I stood fast to what I thought starting in mid-June 2015, I’d be my underpants cheering on Rachel Maddow, Joy Reid, and the rest of their Reich Cabinet of National Salvation in front of an LED screen pretending to be at the Republican convention on MSNBC. But I’m not. And you are not. Fewer and fewer people are, which only reinforces what I’ve been saying here. 

This is why Democrats are scrambling to replace Biden. They have no other game, so they’re going to try to rerun the same one with someone else at the top of it. Maybe the media should focus a little bit more on the reality of that, not just the surface facts, rather than on how people thought differently about someone years ago than they do now.

Derek Hunter is the host of a free daily podcast (subscribe!) and author of the book Outrage, INC., which exposes how liberals use fear and hatred to manipulate the masses, and host of the weekly “Week in F*cking Review” podcast where the news is spoken about the way it deserves to be. Follow him on Twitter at @DerekAHunter.

[allthingskenobi]

Obi-Wan in Exile – Owen Lars

(Originally published on AllThingsKenobi.com January 10, 2021)

Welcome to the second in a series of looks into Obi-Wan Kenobi’s time in exile on Tatooine between Star Wars Episode III: Revenge of the Sith and Star Wars Episode IV: A New Hope. We’ve tried to mine as much Legends and canon material as possible to help guide you through some of the period’s most common and repetitive themes so that when the new Obi-Wan Kenobi series airs, you’ll be ready.

Not everything he ever did in the entire 19 years will be explored here, but as we said, we’ve tried our best to pick out the most prominent and impactful moments to give everyone a better understanding of exactly what one hermit had to endure out there all alone in the sandy deserts of Tatooine.

There’s no way around it: Owen Lars hated Obi-Wan Kenobi. But why? A young Luke Skywalker could have benefited greatly from the two men working together, but it was not to be so. Here we will look at just a few of the many times the Jedi was rejected by the hardened moisture farmer in an attempt to understand just how fraught with tension their relationship really was.

“That wizard’s just a crazy old man.”

STAR WARS EPISODE IV: A NEW HOPE C

Owen Lars was the very first person to ever paint a picture for us of the now-illustrious Obi-Wan Kenobi, and this is what he had to say about him. Though we, alongside Luke, quickly recognize Owen’s words for the untruths they are, we were left to wonder exactly where the animosity, and possible bad blood, between the two men began. Especially since well up until Attack of the Clones was released, Owen was Obi-Wan’s biological brother (as confirmed in original drafts of Return of the Jedi), which made the exchange all the more tragic.

“But what if this Obi-Wan comes looking for him?”

“He won’t, I don’t think he exists any more. He died about the same time as your father.”

STAR WARS EPISODE IV: A NEW HOPE C

Owen continues to try and deter Luke by point-blank telling him that Obi-Wan is dead. It’s another clear falsehood that, at the time, carried little to no weight until twenty-eight years later when we witnessed the “deaths” of both Anakin and Obi-Wan on the slopes of Mustafar in Revenge of the Sith. But that’s a story for another time…

“He makes his terms abundantly clear: “We’ll take him in, but you’ll play no part in his upbringing. If you have to stay on Tatooine, you keep your distance, do you hear? You neither see the boy nor speak to him. He must know nothing about his father.”

“TIME OF DEATH” – FROM A CERTAIN POINT OF VIEW C

“Obi-Wan was glad and relieved that Beru and Owen agreed to raise Luke, but his mission did not end there, as it was also his duty to watch over the boy. He had thought that his ongoing presence would be some comfort to Owen and Beru. He soon learned that he was mistaken.”

LIFE AND LEGEND OF OBI-WAN KENOBI L

Star Wars Episode III: Revenge of the Sith

From the moment Obi-Wan arrived on Tatooine with a newborn Luke Skywalker, Owen made it abundantly clear that the Jedi would have nothing to do with the child. It was an unfair set of terms that Obi-Wan, while doing his best to adhere to, would breach with regular frequency, often pushing his already contentious relationship with the farmer to its breaking point.

Over the years, not only would Obi-Wan often be forced into interceding on the family’s behalf as protection (much to Owen’s chagrin), but he would also willingly cross the line to try and form a relationship with Luke from afar. Whether it was a simple gift of parts for Luke’s skyhopper (1) or a handmade wooden toy (2), the attempts would be vehemently denied and Obi-Wan would find himself right back where he started.

Star Wars 15 C

Was Owen right to be concerned that trouble would follow Obi-Wan back to Luke and their homestead? Of course. Obi-Wan understands and even acknowledges that his watchful gaze could attract attention (3), so he backs off, moving farther out into the Jundland Wastes until the time comes when he is needed. (3)(4) But Owen took his concerns above and beyond, twisting reason into a deep-seated personal hatred of the other man.

“The hut was approximately 136 kilometers from the Lars homestead—farther than Obi-Wan would have preferred, but probably still too close to satisfy Owen Lars.”

LIFE AND LEGEND OF OBI-WAN KENOBI L

“I managed to steer clear of Owen Lars this time. The man doesn’t like me at all.”

KENOBI L

“I’d always believed – always hoped – that Owen’s anger would cool toward me, that one day I would be allowed to train young Luke in the ways of the Force.”

“TIME OF DEATH” – FROM A CERTAIN POINT OF VIEW C

“Old Wounds” – Star Wars Visionaries L

Why? Why did Owen Lars hate Obi-Wan Kenobi so much? First and foremost, he placed the blame of Anakin’s downfall solely on Obi-Wan, going so far as to accuse Obi-Wan of “murder.” (1) It’s interesting to say the least that Owen would have such strong opinions about a man he’d only met once (5), but it seems to become more clear when you take into consideration that Owen adored his step-mother, Shmi. But while Shmi no doubt loved her adoptive family, she often spent her time looking to the horizon waiting for the day when Anakin would return. (6) So for Obi-Wan to have lost Shmi’s beloved son might have been too much for Owen to bear.

We’ll discuss this more in depth later, but Owen even removed Shmi’s headstone, along with the stones of other family members, so that Obi-Wan could no longer visit the site. (7) Consequently, it also ensured that Luke would never know about his grandmother. At least not while he lived at the homestead.

“If killing me would have brought [Anakin’s] mother back to life, I know he would have killed me then and there. I could see it in his eyes.”

LIFE AND LEGEND OF OBI-WAN KENOBI L

At some point, Owen also seemed to have distrusted the Jedi as a whole. It was a prejudice formed the day he watched an angry and unrepentant Anakin Skywalker return from slaughtering a village of Sand People. (2) That being his only interaction with a Jedi before Obi-Wan came along, Owen didn’t want Luke to have anything to do with what he saw in Anakin that day.

“Everyone was stunned when Owen abruptly told Ben to leave and not to come back. The experience had left Luke baffled. Even now, some ten years after the incident, he still did not know why Owen had been so angry with Ben. From what little he knew, he assumed that Ben’s purpose on Tatooine had been to discreetly watch over him while Owen and Beru raised him as if he were an ordinary child, not the son of a Jedi-turned-Sith Lord. But if both Ben and Owen had been responsible for protecting Luke, why hadn’t they gotten along? Luke could only imagine why Owen had so aggressively objected to Ben’s presence. Luke remembered listening to conversations between his uncle and aunt, practically spying on them, hoping to hear any small detail about his father or Ben Kenobi. Owen and Beru never revealed much but merely reinforced that they preferred not to discuss either man.”

LIFE AND LEGEND OF OBI-WAN KENOBI L

Luke cheers, running full pelt toward me, arms as wide as his smile. There is a crunch behind me and I turn, Owen’s fist burying itself in my nose. I slam down hard on the ground, the lightsaber skittering from my hand. All my training, all my experience, and a humble moisture farmer has achieved what neither battle droid nor Sith has achieved, knocking me flat on my back.

“Uncle Owen!” Luke cries in confusion as his uncle manhandles the boy toward his aunt before turning to glower at me.

“Go,” he all but spits, an accusatory finger punctuating the furious decree. “Get away from here. Haven’t you people done enough to this family?”

“TIME OF DEATH” – FROM A CERTAIN POINT OF VIEW C

Lastly, and most unfortunately, Owen never minded expressing his distaste for Obi-Wan in front of Luke, going so far as to strike Obi-Wan and send him away while the boy watched. Would Owen’s treatment of the strange desert hermit help one day drive a wedge between the boy and his uncle? Maybe. Maybe not. All we do know is that Luke, like his father before him, was already inextricably linked to Obi-Wan Kenobi. And there was nothing Owen Lars could do about it.

Citations:

Star Wars 15 by Jason Aaron C

“Time of Death” – From a Certain Point of View by Cavan Scott C

Kenobi by John Jackson Miller L

Life and Legend of Obi-Wan Kenobi by Ryder Windham L

Star Wars Episode II: Attack of the Clones C

Star Wars Episode II: Attack of the Clones Novelization by R. A. Salvatore L

A New Hope: The Life of Luke Skywalker by Ryder Windham L

[songsteps]

ok so I'm gonna try this one more time because inevitably every time I start talking about Crowfeather a couple of things happen:

1) ppl double down on him being more horrible than he was ever actually written, this is expected, I actually have only one thing to adress with this and I'll do it later

2) ppl agree, but then go a step to far and say he never neglected Breezepelt, and that's what I want to adress

now there are several types of neglect, the largest being denying your child their most basic needs which is horrible, and something that Crowfeather did NOT do, which I think is where most people get confused, when I say Crowfeather neglected Breezepelt I mean he did avoid most emotional matters, and honestly if ur kid is looking for ur approval and ur not there for them like, that has an effect on a kid, beleive me, though once again will say for his character it becomes forgivable b/c of the trauma that caused his behaviour, and also because we know he goes and makes ammends when he realizes what's happened, I still want to say that it's not helpful to anyone to just... ignore this part or say it wasn't there

I got an ask in my inbox going over how Crowfeather never neglected Breezepelt which was wrong but it did have good example of Crow trying to at least care for Breeze's physical safety (like being the first one next to Jaypaw to dig Breeze out of the badger set and then trying to stay with him as Nightcloud was carrying him) but it had a line that concerned me that was a statement that they think its obvious that Crowfeather loves Breezepelt and "abusers don't love their victims" which is a dangerous statement to make or even think, it makes ya vulnerable, I only really have experience with a type of abuser who can't love like a normal human, but still "loves" people like they're possessions, abusers use love as a weapon so so so often I'm begging you to take that out of your reasoning when reading ot watching fiction, in much better writen media you will come across abusers who are great at faking love inside their manipulative actions, and in real life I hope you don't have to go through the experience of being with or around some of these people but they exist.... they do

OK and this brings me back around to ppl doubling down on Crowfeather being horrible, and I'm actually gonna start out by saying that this is warriors, and with most characters you are free to interpret them, but you have to know where your personal interpretations start and end

I saw a post, I don't want to bring attention to the poster even if I actually remembered who they were, but I want to adress a point they made b/c it's a very context specfic one, and it was that Crow is an abuser and was using an abuse tactic when he said he 'never hated Breeze, he came to that conclusion on his own and Nightcloud encouraged it' (not exact) the person points out that its shifting blame and is a common tool used by abusers, and they are absolutely correct! and I think we should definitely acknowledge that us a thing abusers do except I'm not sure I'm seeing the same exact thing that you are when I read this bit

first off Crowfeather's only goal here was go say he didn't hate Breezepelt, we know this because he never uses this phrase or anything like it again to drive a wedge between Night and Breeze or anything else, and we've never heard him use it before either, while maybe he could've taken blame right then by saying he was sorry he didn't show it often enough to make Breeze feel that he was loved by him, but we don't acknowledge everything perfectly, I think the reason Crow went to saying Nightcloud encouraged those feelings was because that's what he saw, think about how after the secret of the three being his children was revealed his relationship with Nighcloud would've been more pressed, we dunno exactly how cause we honestly don't see these cats a ton but its a reasonable thing to think, at the same time we know for sure Breezepelt's hatred for Crowfeather grows, because someone IS telling him his father hates him, someone IS planting that idea in his head, its just the Dark Forest and not Nightcloud but I guess Crowfeather made the assumption it is Nightcloud b/c their whole family is so messed up at that point

I'm not saying its good but I am saying that canonincally there is some reason for this being Crow's actual line of thinking, and he never goes any further than saying it in that one instant, he is not using it as an abuse tactic

I will say that honestly this is warriors and the whole Crowfeather Nightcloud and Breezepelt situation is highly interpretative but because of that you can't go and tell how other fans should feel based on your interpretations, I'm not even here, anyone reading this who hates Crow can hate him all they want, but you can't tell me I'm an abuse apologist or anything because there is enough in the text to back up Crowfeather NOT being a full blown abuser, just a traumatized jerk, who does indeed canonically get better

uh, I think my final thoughts are, emotional neglect is neglect, please stop arguing that it isn't in my notes it's a dismissive mindset to have, abusers can appear to "love" their victims please be careful about how you view that whole can of worms there, you can take a lot of actions out of context of the story, and honestly that's fine just don't expect everyone to follow your ideas

basically guys unless someone is doing something legitimately harmful can we all just like... discuss our differences in opinions of characters instead of being like "this is the only right way to read this!" like we can just be like "I prefer this interpretation over this one" AT LEAST with the black cat family of WindClan I feel like we're at ppls throats all the time this is a cat soap opera please I'm dying

[spencers-renaissance]

Start With This

Summary: Luke accidentally hurts Spencer because they are both hopelessly stupid, but when Spencer's faced with a dangerous situation there's nothing he wants more than Luke. Calling him turns out to be a very good decision.

Tags: Hurt/Comfort, Angst with a Happy Ending, Fluff, Misunderstandings, Making Up, Getting Together

Pairing: Luke x Spencer

Word Count: 3.9k

Warnings: implied/mentioned sexual assault, more detailed cw on the end notes of the AO3 post <3

Read on AO3

Luke knows he’s getting obvious. His subtlety has completely thrown itself out the window, his dignity’s in the wind, and he’s so, so painfully aware of it all. 

He was probably in love with Spencer before he even met the man: his reputation had preceded him -- as he’d told him that first day in the briefing room -- and the way his friends talked about him, the gentleness he seemed to possess along with the dynamite intelligence of a 187 IQ had his stomach fluttering as he walked in to meet him for the first time. And hadn’t that just sealed the deal. 

Spencer’s face as he walked into the room feels like it’s been permanently burned into the back of his eyelids ever since. He’s not sure what he’d been expecting but it certainly wasn’t someone so adorable. He’d been so open and welcoming and they’d hit it off straight away, every look shared between them, every joint task on the case in Arizona had him buzzing with excitement. If he could spend every waking moment with Spencer, he would. 

And he’s been so good at keeping it under wraps, but lately the looks the girls and Rossi have been sending his way are a bit too… knowing. Like they see right through him. It’s terrifying, really. He’s never had a bad coming out story, mostly because he didn’t until his late twenties when it was much less taboo to be gay and he was surrounded by people who cared far too much about him as a person to care about who he fucked. But he’s also never had a crush on a coworker before, not even a friend, so to be under so much scrutiny in a situation that feels so out of his depths is overwhelming to say the least.

The next case they take on, then, he takes extra caution to be subtle. He volunteers to pair up with others before Emily can assign him something with Spencer; he ignores the looks he directs his way and leaves him behind to room with JJ while he pairs up with Steven. Maybe it’s even more obvious, maybe the looks he’s getting now are far harder to deal with than the ones before but he’s made his bed. Now he’ll lie in it.

And he’ll pointedly refuse to acknowledge the hurt looks Spencer is shooting his way. It’s better to ruffle a few feathers now and get over his crush than ruin such a good friendship and drive a wedge through the team, even if his gut twists and his heart protests as Spencer furrows his brow and looks at his feet.

★

Spencer is fully aware that his chances with Luke are slim to none -- he’s not delusional -- but boy does it hurt being avoided like the plague. It takes him back to school, when he was either politely ignored, mocked from a distance or straight up bullied, when nobody could associate themselves with him without risking a beating of their own. 

As soon as the case is over, he declines Emily’s invitation to go for a drink at her place with the rest of the team, instead opting to go out by himself. There’s a small, hole-in-the-wall joint a few blocks from his apartment that he’s been to a few times; it’s low-key and reasonably quiet, and the food is nice, too. It’ll do him good, he thinks, to get out of his head a bit with a few drinks and a book or three. He’s met the guy who owns the place a few times, and no-one pays enough attention to care that he’s reading a book at a bar instead of solemnly staring into a pint or gyrating on the dance floor, neither of which especially appeal to him.

As predicted, the bar is quiet, so he orders a drink and some nachos and heads to a table in the back. He used to hate bars; so full of people and germs he tended to avoid them at all costs. Now though, he finds the background noise soothing, the chatter and music a comforting backdrop to his own isolation. And on days like today, after difficult cases and tricky emotional minefields to navigate, it’s the perfect setting to sit quietly and read, far more preferable than the deafening silence of his apartment. 

For some reason, though, he simply cannot get his mind off Luke. He was so hopelessly gone for him and it was making everyday tasks that much harder. Even psyching himself up to get out of bed and go to work was proving more and more difficult: knowing he would have to face the man he loved so much who clearly did not love him back was bordering on psychological torture at this point. 

His one saving grace, though, was that he’d always been able to take refuge in the fact that they were friends. That even if he could never have Luke kiss him or take him on a date or sleep in his bed, he could have his friendship. He’d have the warm smiles and hugs and inside jokes and that would be enough. But now even that was seeming like a farflung pipe dream. Had he figured him out? Did he realise Spencer’s feelings for him and feel disgusted? Violated even? 

It’s only after Spencer’s been reading the same page over and over for nearly 10 minutes that he gives up and orders another drink. If he can’t distract himself, he may as well drown his sorrows now he’s here. 

And drown them he does. He finally stumbles onto the pavement outside the bar in the small hours of the morning feeling a little dazed and confused, and he squints his eyes as he tries to get his bearings. He lives round here, he knows that much, but where? He’s looking around for a taxi when a man he’d seen sitting not far from him in the bar approaches him. 

“Hey, baby,” he grins, checking Spencer out as obviously as he’d been doing inside.

It takes Spencer’s mind only a few seconds to recognise that he’s in a potentially vulnerable or dangerous situation but he can’t for the life of him sort through his muddled brain fast enough to figure out the correct response, here. Instead he stares dumbly at the man in front of him, trying to not look as scared as he feels. 

“You looking for a good time?” the man asks, reaching a hand forward to pet crudely at his face. Spencer wishes his flinch wasn’t so obviously borne from terror, but he’s sad and drunk and confused so all he can do is shake his head aggressively and back away. “Aww, come on. I’m a catch, I promise.”

Spencer jumps back further, his back hitting a brick wall as he finally finds his voice. “No, leave me alone, thank you,” he says, trying to sound firm but only sounding scared shitless. The man is huge, Spencer is not, and the street is quiet. Spencer does not like any of these variables, let alone a cocktail made from them. 

The man laughs cruelly, but before he gets a chance to respond another beefy guy he recognises from inside the bar comes over, cigarette in his hand, and clocks the situation. “Oi,” he shouts aggressively, approaching the two of them. “Who the fuck do you think you are? Dude said no.”

“Oh yeah? And what are you gonna do about it?”

Before Spencer can blink, the beefy guy punches his assailant square in the eye, causing him to cuss them both out before telling Spencer he isn’t even worth the trouble and leaving to lick his wounds. “Hey, you okay?” the beefy dude asks, voice much softer when talking to Spencer. “You need me to call someone?”

At this moment, the only person Spencer wants is Luke. He’s shaken up and so sad, and even if Luke is sort of the reason for that, he has to try, right? Maybe… maybe he just was having a bad day and it isn’t Spencer at all. He could call JJ but even her cuddles wouldn’t scratch the itch that’s burning away at his skin, so he finally shakes his head at the guy looking at him with concern. “No, no it’s okay,” he says slowly, voice catching a little. “I know who to call.”

★

Luke also says no to Emily’s invitation, instead heading back to his own place and cracking open a bottle of wine before plonking himself in front of the team and appreciating the cuddles Roxy chooses to bestow on him. He throws in an oven pizza sometime around 11pm and eats it, laughing humourlessly at the scene for a moment. God, if his colleagues could see just how pathetic he is Emily would have to boot him off the team. 

The wine and the warm temperature of the room have him dozing off on the sofa by midnight but he’s woken up abruptly by his phone ringing not long after. The clock on the wall says 1.50am so this is either a case or an emergency; blearily he picks it up to see Spencer’s name on the screen and he can’t slide his finger to answer it fast enough. 

“Spencer?” he asks, voice full of concern. 

The only reply is a choked off sob, making Luke sit up on high alert. “Spence, what’s wrong?” his voice is gentle but determined, he wants to know what’s wrong so he can fix it damnit.

“Can you-- Can you come and get me?” Spencer asks tearfully. He sounds hesitant like he thinks Luke might say no or be angry with him which doesn’t make any sense. He’d never feel like that, not for anything Spencer needs from him. 

“Of course,” he reassures him, gently, still a little bewildered by the absurdity of it all. He springs into action and leaps off the sofa, slipping into some trainers and grabbing his keys. “Where are you, Spence? I’m on my way to the car.”

Spencer rattles off an address before he says, “Wait, don’t go, can you stay on the phone with me?”

Luke’s heart damn near melts at that but he obeys and stays on the phone with him, mumbling platitudes and promising he’s on his way the whole five minute drive until he pulls up in front of the address Spencer gave him, immediately spotting the younger man hunched down against a wall. He parks the car quickly and rushes over, crouching down in front of Spencer and gently pulling his head away from his knees so he can look into his eyes. He immediately recognises he’s drunk and sighs internally, hoping this won’t be too impossible. 

“Hey, Spence, what’s going on?” he asks earnestly, holding onto the man’s forearms partially to help steady himself and partially to offer a noninvasive point of contact for Spencer. 

“Sad,” Spencer says, looking into Luke’s eyes with wide, honest eyes. “You’re angry at me.”

“What?” Luke asks incredulously. “I’m not angry at you, Spencer.”

“Yes,” Spencer nods enthusiastically. “You wanted to work with other people on the case today. You were ignoring me.”

He’s not quite slurring his words but it’s close, and if Luke wasn’t so concerned about the situation at hand he’d find it adorable. “Oh, Spencer, no,” he protests, a sinking feeling in his chest. His own insecurities and fears had got the better of him and he’d managed to make Spencer feel bad about himself. “That was unrelated and not your fault at all, okay? It’s complicated and definitely not a conversation to have on the ground outside a bar at 2am, but we can talk about it somewhere else if you’d like. Do you want me to take you back to your place?”

Spencer looks back at him. “No, don’t want to be alone, please don’t leave me on my own, Luke,” he says, eyes wide in fear this time, not honesty. 

“Okay, okay,” he placates him. “Would you like to come back to mine?”

Spencer launches forward to hug Luke, burying his face into his neck and Luke takes the opportunity to relish the feeling of Spencer’s lithe body against his own, the intimacy he craves so deeply finally being awarded in a small way. “Should I take that as a yes?” he chuckles.

As soon as they get into Luke’s apartment, he gets to sobering Spencer up. He’d managed to pry the number of drinks he’d had out of him in the car, and as soon as they get back he butters him some toast and gives him a glass of water to drink on the sofa while he fills up another glass and grabs some advil. 

“How’s that, Spence, are you okay?” he asks softly as he joins him on the sofa where Spencer is dutifully munching down the toast while late-night TV plays in the background. 

“Yeah,” he whispers, smiling up at Luke, already looking more lucid than he did on the street, though he suspects part of the reason was he was scared and a bit disoriented then and now feels safe. “Thank you.”

“You don’t have to thank me, Spencer,” he smiles back, patting his knee affectionately as he pours him another glass of water. “Have your toast and another glass of water and then you can have a shower, if you like. It’ll help ground you and warm you up a bit.”

Spencer’s compliant through it all, which is obviously desirable, but he’s also quiet. He takes the hoodie Luke chucks his way without comment and slips it on -- Luke very pointedly does not think about how good he looks -- before looking to him for his next direction. 

His eyes are much clearer now and he seems far more sad than drunk, so Luke steers him back to the sofa and hands him a blanket. “Hey, Spencer,” he says, waiting for him to look up before continuing. “What’s going on? Why did you need me to pick you up?”

Spencer fidgets with the blanket as he answers. “Well, I went to the bar to stop thinking, like distract myself, but it didn’t really work so I just decided to have some wine instead, which was really nice and I liked the fuzziness, but then when I left there was this man. He came up to me and was trying to… like he was trying to ask me to sleep with him,” he risks a quick look up to check if Luke is listening to him but averts his eyes from the intense stare when he realises he is. “But I couldn’t remember what I was supposed to do and I panicked but then this man came out of the bar and he punched the other guy and helped me but then I called you so he didn’t have to do anything else.” His voice is nervous as he talks, clearly unsure of himself from the way he darts around from point to point, his typical eloquence evading him. 

“I’m sorry, Spencer,” Luke says, earnestly. “I’m sorry that happened to you but I’m even more sorry that you were sad enough to drown your sorrowsbecause of me. Tomorrow, I promise we can talk about this and I’ll explain everything, but right now I think you should sleep. You can take my bed or the sofa tonight, whichever one makes you feel more comfortable, and then I’ll make you whatever you want for breakfast in the morning and we can chat. How does that sound?”

Spencer looks satisfied for now, cocking his head to the side. “Hm, can I have pancakes?” he asks.

Luke laughs fondly at that, leaning forward to ruffle Spencer’s hair lightly as he tries not to read into it when Spencer leans into his touch. “Are you kidding?” he teases. “You’re looking at the pancake maker extraordinaire right here.” He relishes Spencer’s giggle at that, pleased at how relaxed he looks now he knows Luke isn’t angry at him. “Pancakes in the morning. For now, where would you like to sleep?”

“The sofa’s fine,” Spencer says softly, a small smile playing over his face as he follows Luke with his eyes as he stands up to collect some blankets and pillows. “Thank you, Luke.”

“You don’t have to thank me,” he smiles back, and hands him the extra blankets and cushions. “We’ll talk in the morning.”

★

Spencer wakes up to the sound of dog paws on wooden floors and is momentarily confused -- he does not have a dog nor wooden floors -- before the events of last night flood into his head with a crashing wave of humiliation. He sits up abruptly, blinking his eyes against the soft grey light of the gloomy day, and looks around until he meets Luke’s eyes where he’s sat drinking a cup of coffee at the dining table. 

He knows he’s flushing an embarrassing shade of red but he can’t help it, this whole situation is so bizarre. “Good morning,” he finally says.

“Morning Spencer,” Luke says, hiding his far-too-wide smile behind his coffee mug. “Did you sleep okay?”

He just nods and hums in response, before excusing himself and rushing to the bathroom for a small semblance of privacy. Looking in the mirror, he splashes his face with some cold water and fiddles with his hair until it’s sat the way he wants it to before taking some deep breaths in a vain attempt at composure. He’s sort of in love with Luke, being in his apartment like this is mildly intoxicating. 

Eventually, he surfaces back in the main living area where Luke’s already started on the pancakes. “Hey, you good?” he calls over his shoulder as he flips the pan, a delish smell intoxicating the kitchen.

“I’m good,” Spencer confirms, joining him in the kitchen for a front row seat of Luke cooking. Chatting menially together as the pancake stash slowly builds, Spencer gathers all the toppings at Luke’s direction before they move to sit at the table and start tucking in, both trying to ignore the rising tension at what they both know is coming.

“You’re being so nice to me now but all throughout the case you barely looked at me, I mean you couldn’t even share a room with me in the hotel,” Spencer says after a few moments of silent apprehension as they have their first bites. “Is it… is it because I’m gay?” His voice drops to a whisper, face contorting from confusion to apprehension, feeling a little nervous that Luke might get angry now he’s reminded him of it.

“What, no, Spencer, of course not,” Luke says defensively. “God, I’m not a homophobe. The exact opposite, actually. I’m gay, too.”

“Oh.” 

“Yeah.” Luke puts his knife and fork down and runs a hand over his face as he psychs himself up. “That’s the problem. The truth is, I’m into you, Spencer, very much so. And I’m fully aware that you’re my best friend and you won’t feel the same way, so… that’s a problem. The others were starting to realise so I distanced myself, but it has nothing to do with you, it’s all me so please don’t blame yourself, alright?”

“Oh.” Spencer’s brain is short-circuiting.

“I’m sorry, I just needed to explain why I acted like that.” Luke apologises, sitting forward again. “I know this is probably making you uncomfortable, I can drop you back or call you a cab or something--”

“No,” Spencer says suddenly, snapping back into action as the information finally processes. Leaving right now is the last thing he wants. “No, I’m fine. Sorry, I’m just caught off guard. You… like me?”

“Well, yeah,” Luke smiles, a little awkwardly. “If you want to put it like that.”

“Oh.” He pauses for a moment as everything finally clicks into place. “We are both very stupid.”

“Why’s that?”

“Because the primary reason I was sad and drinking at a bar alone last night was because I am very much in love with you and feared you were pushing me away. That I’d lost my chance forever,” Spencer explains. “I don’t have much experience with relationships, so I didn’t know how to deal with it and when you started acting distant I did the same and… ran away, I guess.”

Luke’s glad that Spencer’s eyes are clear this morning and his eloquence is back or he’d fear he’s still somehow drunk out of his mind still and has no idea what he’s saying. “Oh.” It’s his turn to blank on a response. 

“To be honest, Luke, I don’t know where to go from here,” Spencer laughs, a little awkwardly.

“Let’s start with this,” Luke says, getting up from his seat across the table and sliding into the chair next to Spencer, bridging the gap between the two before he kisses him gently. Spencer’s hand reaches forward to grip the front of his shirt, kissing back with just as much trusting desire as he feels Luke smile against his lips. They part at the kiss’ natural conclusion, pulling back to look at each other, tense awkwardness replaced with a new understanding of one another. 

“Yeah,” Spencer smiles. “That feels like a good start.”

It’s a good start, but it’s by no means the end. The heaviness that had weighed between them for so long finally lifts and the lightness that replaces it means they both breathe easier, finishing their pancakes in between shy, cautious looks and shameless giggles. “Do you have anything you need to do today?” Luke asks as he washes their plates up, Spencer perched on the kitchen counter next to him. 

“Nope,” Spencer says, smiling at the implication of such an answer. 

“Well, what do you feel like doing?” he asks, wearing far too cheeky of a grin for Spencer to avoid leaning down and planting a kiss on his lips. 

“Hm,” Spencer ponders, looking out the window at the rainy day. “I think movies and snacks would be perfect if I have you as company.”

“You smooth little thing,” Luke teases, poking Spencer’s side with a wet finger and delighting in the giggle that escaped his lips. “That sounds perfect to me.” He washes the frying pan last and quickly wipes down the kitchen before they head to the sofa, arms piled high with all the crisps, chocolate and cookies they can find in his cupboards. Spencer also digs about in the freezer and finds a pint of ice cream to share, which they feed each other bites of later in a sickeningly sweet, cliched moment of tenderness.

Luke chooses the first movie, picking out a Marvel film that Spencer ends up actually enjoying, though Luke can’t exactly say the same about Spencer’s choice, an obscure period piece from the 1960s. Still, he cuddles him close and pays attention to every minute. If it matters to Spencer, it matters to him. 

And if wasting the day away with movies, snacks, and heart to hearts turns out to be exhausting enough that Spencer just has to stay the night again, this time sharing Luke’s bed with him and Roxy, then they’ll just have to make the absolute most out of such a terribly inconvenient situation. And they’ll deal with how to hide a 2 night love-fest from a team of profilers in the morning, because they’re far too oblivious to realise they already know.

Tags: @johanna-swann @pretty-b0yy 

[infernalshadowtheif]

Synthetic Blood

After taking over her father's company, Lena Luthor spends her time trying to develop a safe man made synthetic blood for medical science and maybe for herself and her kind too of course. You see, Lena is technically human but she is also technically a vampire, well more of a half vampire that's more or less human except for her extra abilities and vitality. As she tries to develop a Blood substitute her brother Lex attempts to steer her away from the light and back down a dark path that has always beckoned her to walk down.

[Look, vampires are kinda cool and I've been meaning to finish this idea that I literally dreamed about last year so let me know if you guys like it, hate it, or have ideas for it yeah? I'll post it on Ao3 later.] Words: 3,036K 🙃

Lillian took the cold metal brush handle in her hand, making it up to her hair, and started to brush through the already smooth tresses of hair on Lena's head.

"On to more pressing matters, it seems we won't be hunting for a while, seeing that the humans are now more aware of our kind since your brother started his little war with the Kryptonians." The aimless brushing continued a bit rougher than before but not painful.

"How are we to feed then mother, how are you going to feed? I am obviously already prepared but I know you prefer straight from the source." There was a slight hesitation in the last stroke of the cold brush.

Lillian set it down slowly almost methodically as she turned away and towards the moonlit window behind them.

Lena looked after the older woman cautiously.

"Mother?"  Wearily she stood from the vanity mirror and closer to Lillian’s side. 

She received a click of a tongue as an answer before she sighed.

"I hated how it reeked on his body, your father I mean, I hated how the smell of artificial blood was always stuck to him, it reminded me of that awful white meat substitute that some humans love in place of real meat."

"Tofu mother," Lena added helpfully as Lillian sneered further at the window and crossed her arms over her chest in defiance. 

"Yes, that was it. He always smelled of his fake blood, you already adopted his tendencies to not want to drink from the source of what we need to survive, which is fine but I’ll never understand it." She turned her head to Lena almost puzzled.

“Well mother I know that this situation will be harder but I’ll try and figure something out for us. I'm sure I can maybe synthesize something more to your preferences if need be." 

Lillian wasn't the warmest parent compared to most others but after Lex went on with his blood-war with the aliens, she saw that Lena was more stable than she originally thought, especially compared to her son. So through great effort and shattered pride, she tried her best to bridge the gap between her and her daughter as best as she could, trying to make up for years of neglect and misplaced scorn.

With a defeated sigh Lillian finally turned to look at her youngest,

"Thank you, dear, I know you'll try no matter how many times I say I'll be fine. I just want you to  use that brilliant brain of yours for more than just little old me, I'm content with the choices and endless amount of repenting I have waiting for me when it's time." Lillian never smiled at Lena, at least not often, especially as a child, but the one she gave her at that moment was the best one she'd ever seen.

“I think we all do mother. Thank you for taking care of me and letting me wait out the sun for today, I lost track of time again.” Lena lightly skims her thumb over the still healing blemish on her arm, if she were a full vampire like the rest of the Luthors in her family she would have lost it or simply turned to dust as her father did.

“Any time dear, this is still your home too, no matter what your brother claims.”

Lena almost cries, such simple words that her past self would have never dreamed of hearing from the woman before her, Lena simply nods in acknowledgment and heads back out to her car to get back to her apartment.

The drive back to National City is quiet, the long highway back lets her mind playback the hellish day she had, to say she’s dreading the minute she has to see the cities resident Super would be an understatement.

She saw me, I know she saw what I’m capable of. Or at least that I'm definitely NOT human. 

Lena’s thoughts turn darker as she imagines the red-caped hero’s look of repulsion and utter hate when she does truly figure out that she’s a creature of the dark, or, at least half of one.

Her mind spirals further down the dark hole of fear of what she will do with her, so much so that she missed the new set of headlights quickly coming closer in her side-view mirror.

When it finally caught enough to slam into her back bumper she quickly snaps out of it and tries to keep her own car on the road and away from the sheer drop of the mountainside to her right.

“Fuck! Now, what!?” The vehicle sways again as the car behind her clashes into hers, she took one of her more pedestrian cars today so her usual horsepower she’d use to escape is severely lacking this time as another hit on her life is in motion again this week. 

So much for going incognito.

The shattering of her rear window makes her jump, the side of her car slamming right into the metal railing, seeing the lack of ground on the other side has her heart drop right into her stomach as she tries to get control again. 

Big nope to that.

Another pop was registered in Lena’s brain as she finally lost control of her car, her vision spinning just as quickly as the car itself.

“Fuckfuckfuck! I swear, I'm going to stake you myself when I deal with your pets, Lex!” Sweating out of panic, Lena decides that trying to outspeed them won’t happen while in her brick ford car, she figures that she just might have to use some of her power for this one.

Her car makes a sudden stop as the front end crashes through the metal railing at the edge of the road, she was lucky the car became wedged into the twisted metal otherwise she would have had a very unfortunate freefall over the cliff.

Dizzyingly, Lena pries her hands from the steering wheel, her death grip making her bones ache as she tried for her seatbelt next. The sound of car doors slamming shut jumpstarts her heartrate, flooding her system with adrenaline. 

The shadows in the headlights get closer, the sound of a gun reloading, four sets of boots crunching on gravel as they round her car on both sides. 

She is actually scared now, her right shoulder twinges painfully as she tries to rip out the buckle of her seatbelt, “Ah, shit.” They actually hit her it seems, her white blouse is starting to bleed red down her arm the more she struggles on the belt.

A balding man crouches down into her window, his eyes are glazed over, his face is twisted into a sickening grin. “Hello halfy,” He sneers. “Your big brother wanted us to check in on you this fine night, he was deathly worried for your health as of late.” 

His gaze snaps to her bloody shoulder fixated on it for a second or so as he takes a deep breath of warm fresh blood, his dull eyes start to pool red as he takes another lung full of bloody air.

Lena shudders in disgust tilting her face away from his, he reeks of death and rot, ghouls were her least favorite creature that her brother had in his employ.

“Enjoying ourselves are we?” She mutters as his eyes roll open again.

He hums in delight. “He did say your blood was more or less mortal, it's almost humanly sweet.” his smile widens, some kind of old meat seemingly stuck in his teeth and gums as he appraises the state of her and her battered car. “Shame you didn't drive your nicer car, we could have stripped it for parts, but ah, oh well. We’re only here for you tonight then sadly.” 

A creaking noise shook the car as he ripped her driver’s door clean off its hinges, Lenas heightened smell was shocked by a wall of death the bald man oozed when he leaned in to free her of her seatbelt and dragged her out of the car by the scruff of her blouse.

Still dazed and newly freed from the metal deathtrap, Lena saw this as her last chance to try and escape from her brother’s lackeys. “I may smell human but by no means does that mean that I’m weak like one.” Latching onto the ghoul’s arm with shaking hands, Lena uses his own weight to counterbalance them both into the loose dirt and flipped herself over again to grab for his throat. She hates to use it but her power has to be used now before what little blood she does drink wears off and leaves her completely defenseless, she’ll have to kill him quickly.

His body starts to convulse as she uses her hand to tear into his fragile throat, black rotten blood oozing over her fingers as his body finally stops thrashing about. She’s still aware of the three heartbeats of the other goons as she finally stands up, her glowing eyes lock onto a man with mousy brown hair, his own eyes are terrified. They all are.

These ones are all human, two are just boys compared to her own age, and they’re all frozen stock still like rabbits to a fox.

Lena is shaking, she doesn’t kill humans, she won’t stoop to her brother’s level. “Leave, go home and forget about this whole night, I don't want to kill any of you. This man was not human, he likely would have eaten you all after my death so take this as an act of mercy. Please.”

The youngest is seems to want no part so he tossed down his weapon and dragged the other two back to their vehicle, the older ones still frozen and staring at the rapidly decaying body of the now-dead ghoul. “Let’s get the hell out of here guys!”

The car ripped out and back onto the highway leaving a wobbly and drained Lena in the dust, “Ugh!” She shrieks in anger as she kicks the rotten body in her rage. 

Before she can take out more of her frustration on the dead ghoul she hears a familiar chime of her phone’s ringtone, or more specifically, Karas ringtone. 

“Shit. Movie night, I was supposed to be at Karas tonight.” Grumbling as she whipped her bloody hand on her jeans, she bent over to pick up her cracked phone to answer her friend.

“Lena?” Lena sighed, “Hi Kara, I'm sorry for not calling you back, I seem to have run into some car trouble on my way to yours.” Glancing over to her clearly totaled car she winced at the sight of it, “Well more like it's completely totaled now.”

On Karas’s end of the line, she heard a crash and rushing of footsteps, “Ohmygosh! Are you okay Lena?? Where are you, I can come to get you or send my friend to help? Please tell me you’re okay..”

The brunette felt her eyes well up with tears, she really didn't deserve this human known as Kara Danvers, she really didn't. 

“I'm off of creek falls and the main highway near the cliff drop, I'm no worse for wear sort of, I'm standing on my own two feet at the moment so I’d say ok, for now anyway, I definitely need a shower and a lot of sleep after this though.” Lena tried to joke but didn't hear Kara anymore, just a rush of air against the microphone.

Confused Lena checks the line, “Kara? Are you still there?” 

“Y-yeah Lena I'm still here, um, please don't be mad." Now that made Lena pause. "What? Why would I be mad at you?" 

The wind in the earpiece lighted up a bit, "I'm almost there, I'm picking you up, I called Alex she'll be on her way too okay? Was there another car involved or an animal run across the road?" Panic gripped at Lena, Kara can't see this mess! Let alone the rotting ghoul body at her feet, she wouldn't understand!

"Kara, wait, it’s alright I already called the authorities and everything, it'll take a bit but I'm fine right now, also don't drive while on the phone! I don't want to be the cause of yet another accident tonight." Lena hear Kara scoff into the phone, "Thank you for the concern, but I'm definitely not driving, I don't even have a permit." She chuckled at her own expense.

Another pause.

"I'll be fine, just promise not to be mad when you see me? Yelling is fine but don't hate me, please." Anxiety wasn't a common thing for Lena but right now she can feel it clawing up her throat and she swallowed down her guilt of having her sweet fragile Kara seeing what her own monstrous hands are capable of. 

She trusts Kara with her life, she'll have to trust her with her dark secret now. "Only if you promise me the same, it’s a mess over here and I'm certain that it'll be horrific for you to see why." 

Kara hummed in thought for a second, "Well duh, I could never hate you Lena, or any other bad emotion towards you really." She said carefully like if she said it louder Lena wouldn't believe her.

"Ah wait, I think I see you? Oh." Kara whispered then the line went dead.

Lena was sitting hunched against her busted car, looking around confused at the lack of vehicle, Kara nowhere in sight. Letting out a ragged breath Lena let her head fall back with her eyes closed, praying that Kara would listen to her explain the scene before her.

The brunette’s eyes snapped open when she felt a warm hand on her good shoulder, to say she almost shit a brick would be putting it very lightly because right before her was Supergirl, but in Kara Danvers' sweats, T-shirt, and a very red cape with no socks or shoes to top it all off. Being shocked would be a very light word for how Lena is at that moment. 

Super- uh, Kara is pretty much herself while she looks Lena over,  making soft cooing noises as she checks over each scrape and bruise, she all but balls her eyes out when she shifts Lena's shirt to check the gunshot wound. 

"Lena, Rao, I should have listened further out for you, if I was listening I could have stopped this." Lena was a bit slow to process her words but she quickly bounced back and stupidly asked, “Kara? You’re not human?” Kara stilled her hands, “Yeah. I'm sorry I kept it from you ‘till now, I just could never find the right moment to tell you. I was going to try again tonight if that’s  worth anything.” 

Kara did look nervous, wary that Lena was angry about her lying for so long, but instead of being angry Lena just full body laughed at their predicament.

As light tears started to form in Lena's eyes Kara nervously held the brunette's hand. "Lena? I don't know if laughing should make me feel nervous or happy right now." 

Lena chuckled a couple more times and pulled the blonde into a relieved hug. "I've been an idiot, I've been trying to bring up the fact that I'm not human either for the past year Kara, so right now I think it's a bit ridiculous that you've been worrying about the same thing." Lena definitely didn't miss the full bodied twitch Kara did after hearing her say this, she understood though, Lena is technically human but only partially. It was briefly a one sided embrace until Kara hugged her back with almost all her strength, leaving Lena only mildly squished but overall content.

Their little bubble was immediately burst when a black SUV pulled up to blind the two of them, a bedraggled Alex dressed in her own pajamas and combat boots holding a shovel, "Kara. Tell me why did you text me 911 please  bring a shovel! At 1 am Kara- WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT??" 

Alex is out of her car and right by Kara's side almost instantly when the once thought to be dead ghoul flips onto its side to drag its to Lena, grossly gurgling its black blood as it crawls over to the trio.

"That would be what's left of my brother's newest hit and sent to check in on me. He's a ghoul so I probably should have made sure to take the whole head off inside of ripping her throat out." Lena extracts herself from an equally shocked Kara and tugs the shovel out of Alex's limp fingers, "Please pardon me, I'll give it right back." 

Alex looks at her dumbfounded, Lena shrugs as she turns back to the ghoul clearly annoyed beyond belief. "I would say have a nice trip given that you're going straight to hell but I really don't appreciate what you did to my car, " she glances over at the once upon a time pristine white paint job and cringes at the many bullet holes and scratches.

"Actually I'm more pissed that I had to meet you at all, so, bye now." 

She raised the shovel as high as she could with her good arm and swung down with all of her might, the ghoul let out one last hiss as the head fell from his body. 

Exhausted Lena looks back at the gawking Danvers sisters, "Help me clean this up and I'll get you both whatever food you want and could eat for a month?" She was almost certain Alex was going to shoot her up until that offer was in play, both sisters bolted up and came over to help.

"You're also going to fill us in about whatever the hell that thing was and why he worked for your brother." Alex stated as she waved her hand in Lena's direction in an almost protective voice.

"And about the not human thing." Kara mumbled as she grabbed the creatures legs over to the deepening hold Alex was currently working on.

With a big sigh of relief Lena nodded, vowing to answer whatever her two friends asked her.

"Deal."

[justimajin]

Something Smells Fishy 

› Pairing: Taehyung x Reader 

› Genre: Fluff & Angst, Crack (a very nice dose of it) - part of Bangtan Boardwalk’s fic event 

› Words: 14.1k

› Summary: Summer is finally here and vacation is on the rise. Spending some quality time with your friends and having a joyous holiday is something you’re definitely looking forward to, but a sudden turn of events proves you otherwise with the addition of a surprise guest that you’re not exactly keen on seeing. You suppose it could be worse, worse than having to lose two of your precious limbs and growing a ginormous fish tail out of nowher- wait WHAT?!

› Warnings: pg13, not much aside from fish jokes

The sound of wheels rolling against the wooden floor resonates through the dorm. 

Your giant black suitcase has been tightly packed and filled to the brim, nearly appearing on the verge of exploding soon enough. There’s a pair of peach coloured sunglasses resting against the bridge of your nose with skin that glows from sunscreen overuse and a straw floppy hat perched on top of your head. Dressed in a tank top and a pair of shorts, the adventure you’ve planned is pretty obvious at this point. 

That’s right. You’re going on vacation. 

And you won’t be alone this time. 

The red SUV is parked along the sidewalk, sunlight highlighting it’s sheer capacity. You smile when a head of blonde sticks out from the window, her arms erratically waving at you. 

“Y/N!!” She hurriedly unbuckles her belt and pushes against the car door, welcoming you with open arms. “I’m so glad you could make it!” 

“Me too Eunha.” A hand tugs at your suitcase and you release your grip, letting her prop it up into the back of the car. She squeezes it in with the rest of the luggage, gesturing for you to open the peripheral door. 

“I think Sunyi’s still sleeping back in there.” She remarks with a smirk. You frown, brows knitting together as you go to yank at the door handle. Inside, you find her passed on a handful of snacks - presumably ones Eunha probably grabbed for all of you. 

Eunha circles behind you, her hand pounding against the roof. “Hey! Sleepyhead! Wake up!” 

You chuckle as she barely stirs and Eunha apologetically smiles, “I swear she totally wanted to meet you.” 

“Uh-huh.” You lean over and rip open one of the bags, letting the scent fill through the congested car. Within moments, Sunyi’s eyes flutter open and she’s staring back at you like a child being offered a toy. 

“Really?” Eunha scoffs as Sunyi grabs the bag, scarfing down the contents. “That’s all it took?” 

“What? I was hungry.” Sunyi defends, but her eyes land right on top of you and instantly she’s lunging for you, bag all forgotten. “Oh my gosh, Y/N!!” 

Eunha sighs as you hug Sunyi back, glancing at her watch, “Well kiddos, we got approximately an hour to get to our destination. Are we picking up the guys too?” 

“Is that even a question?” Sunyi counters. You settle down into the passenger seat as Eunha takes the wheel. The engine roars and she applies pressure on the accelerator, reversing the car out. 

“I dunno, ever since lover boy came into the story we haven’t been able to hang out as much.” Eunha honestly adds much to Sunyi’s reluctance. 

“Sorry about that guys…” 

“It’s alright.” Eunha waves it off, putting on her sunglasses, “As long as you and Hoseok aren’t sucking face every five minutes while we’re trying to talk, I don’t really mind.” 

“What?” Sunyi’s eyes are narrowed, offense written all over her, “We do not suck face every five minutes.” 

“Hm, keep telling yourself that hon.” 

“What?” Sunyi interjects again, turning to you this time, “Do you seriously think me and Hoseok are like that, Y/N?” 

You wistfully smile and shrug, “I’m afraid I’m with Eunha on this one.” 

Eunha laughs and Sunyi whimsically deflates in the back, throwing her hands up in exasperation. “I can’t believe my friends hate my boyfriend.” 

“If we hated him that much, I wouldn’t be driving to his place to pick him and his friends up.” Eunha points out, but a vibrating sound pulls Sunyi out of it. 

“Speak of the devil~” She sing-songs, flicking out her phone with giggles. You and Eunha simultaneously sigh, aware that she was going to be out of reach for a while. 

“So what’s been going on with you, Y/N?” Eunha asks, shaded eyes still trained on the road, “Last time we spoke, you were pretty busy with finals.” 

“Eh, just the usual.” You shrug, stretching your arms and leaning back on your seat, “Aside from college being a nightmare, not much has been going on.” 

Eunha hums, “I’ve been looking forward to this though, we haven’t gotten together in so long and I’ve been needing a decent vacation for a while.” 

“So you’re okay now..?” Eunha cautiously says, her voice barely making out from Sunyi’s loud one in the background. 

A sad smile flickers on your lips for a brief moment, but it vanishes just as quick. 

“Of course I’m okay.” You smugly smirk, raising a brow, “What did you take me for?” 

“I know, I know.” Eunha scoffs, so used to your triumphing vibe, “I just get worried. We hadn’t heard about you in so long and then you said you didn’t want to come-” 

“I was just busy.” 

“I know.” Eunha glances at you, “But I still need to ask.”

You hum, acknowledging her concerns. 

“Well I can assure you I’m fine now, Eunha.” You playfully grin at her, warmth spreading through your features, “I’m just looking forward to spending a good time with my favourite girls after so long.” 

Eunha smiles at your confidence, but it’s broken by Sunyi’s high pitch. 

“Aww, of course I love you baby! You’re my hopeful sunshine! My darling cutie patootie!” Sunyi coos loudly, sounding more like she was talking to a child instead of her boyfriend. You and Eunha warily exchange an odd stare, right before the two of you burst out laughing much to Sunyi’s protests. 

“Hopeful sunshine? Darling cutie patootie?” Eunha enunciates sarcastically, gawking at Sunyi from the rear mirror, “That’s a lot of words for a guy who spilled his coffee on me, Sun.” 

The memory of the incident causes you to chuckle. “You guys are just jealous!!” Sunyi huffs, resuming her phone call. You assume Hoseok asked her about the random ruckus in the background because she goes on to explain that she was in the car with the two of you. 

“Jealous?” Eunha snickers, “Of what? That I don’t have a boyfriend who spills coffee on my friends?” 

“Didn’t you go on a date with one of his friends?” You bring up, recalling her sending you a picture of him, “What was his name? Junghyeon…?” 

“Jungkook.” She corrects, “He was alright. I think I could see him more as a friend than someone I wanted to date.” 

“Fair enough.” 

“I think he’s actually coming too.” She adjusts her position, looking at her rear mirror, “Hey Sun, which of Hoseok’s friends are coming with us?” 

“I’ll ask right now!” She exclaims, sweetly repeating the question to her boyfriend on the line. You and Eunha patiently wait for an answer, but silence is all that greets you. 

“Sun?” Eunha cranes her neck back for a moment, “Who’s coming?” 

“Y/N…..” She whispers, voice cracking. You twist around as well, brows furrowed at her meek tone. 

“What?” 

“Uh, well you see…” Her eyes fall onto the ground, “Hoseok was surprised to hear you were coming. I think it was because we made this plan before you confirmed so he didn’t know and-” 

“Sun, what is it?” You ask sterner this time, her pale expression drawing concern out of you by the minute. 

“H-He’s coming.” Sunyi gets out, “I’m so sorry Y/N, I wish I knew before, I-I would have said no.” 

“What do you mean he’s-” Your words die out at her guilty expression and you silently eye Eunha for a moment, who has annoyance etched onto her features. A heavy silence enters the car, and long gone is the surreal joy. 

Eunha’s lips twitch. 

“Y/N, you say the word and Hoseok will tell him not to come.” Sunyi opens her mouth as if to counteract, but the stiffening of your shoulders renders her unable to suggest anything. 

“No, it’s okay.” You state, “You guys didn’t know if I was going to come until last minute so Hoseok probably didn’t think twice to invite him.” 

“Are you sure Y/N?” Sunyi presses on, “I can still ask if it’s uncomfortable.” 

You shake your head. Although the onslaught of new information did take you by surprise, you can’t simply brush away that he was closely associated with Hoseok. 

You look at Sunyi with a smile, “Nah, it’s fine.” 

“O-Okay.” 

Sunyi sinks back into her seat and Eunha focuses back on the road. Sunyi eventually ends up falling asleep midway through the drive and Eunha occasionally chimes through with pieces of conversation for you, but you can barely respond as your eyes narrow down on the bits of scenery passing by your window. 

You hadn’t been expecting this, at least, expecting it on a vacation that you ultimately decided would have been in the best interest when it came down to clearing your mind. But you would be foolishly lying to yourself if you were prepared to face him, since he was basically summer personified and regardless to say, a deep wedge in between you and your vacation.

The ride to Hoseok’s place is exhausting long, so the moment you set your eyes on the familiar house, a deep sense of relief cascades through you. 

Hoseok is standing outside by the time Eunha pulls in, his hands energetically waving you over and a cheerful smile painted on his lips. He wears a bright blue beach shirt that has imprints of a sunset, and brown cargo shorts with matching sandals. His black hair has been pushed back with a sheen of hair gel, oddly giving him the mixed appearance of a frat boy and a tourist at the same time. 

You keep that opinion to yourself when Sunyi jumps out of Eunha’s car in enthusiasm, reaching out to hug him instantly. Although you and Eunha have always had your fair share of making fun of the duo, moments like these draw a genuine smile from you at their display of affection.

“Y/N! Eunha!” Hoseok greets you with a friendly smile. You return it and he gestures for all of you to follow, “The guys are inside, I’ll just call them out.” 

Eunha nods and sits down on Hoseok’s red suitcase, huffing as sweat starts to accumulate at her temples. You laugh when she begins to exaggerate her breathing and starts dramatically fanning herself, your laughter only being cut short once a man in a black shirt and similar cargo pants pops out. 

“Hurry up guys, we’re going to be late!” He shouts behind him, placing his large bag onto the ground with a scoff. You narrow your eyes at the size of it compared to the suitcase Eunha was sitting on, an interesting military design covering the exterior. 

He looks up, eyes immediately widening at the appearance of your group until his sight halts at Eunha. 

“O-Oh hi...” You raise an eyebrow at his sudden shyness, only able to fully connect the dots once your eyes land on Eunha’s bashful expression. A huge smirk crosses your lips and Eunha glares at you, but that simply serves to increase it. 

“Hi.” She warmly replies, catching him by surprise. Before you can experience any more awkward air, another person runs out of the house. 

“Sorry Jungkook! My bag’s zipper got stuck.” He pouts, sight landing right onto you. He’s dressed in purple hoodie and black shorts, bright orange hair poking out from underneath the hood. 

“Hi!” He reaches out his hand for you to shake, “I’m Jimin.” 

You smile and take his hand before he goes around introducing himself. Jungkook does the same towards Sunyi and you have to admit, Hoseok’s friends don’t seem so bad. 

Sunyi grins at you like she can read your mind, ecstatic that something’s worked in her boyfriend’s favour. You roll your eyes, just glad that you’ll be spending your vacation with some decent people. 

“Let’s go, we need to hit the road already!” Hoseok’s voice chimes from afar and he emerges out into the driveway. Judging from Sunyi’s averted eyes and Eunha’s surprised ones, you can already assume who the last friend to leave the house is. 

You turn around at the sound of deep laughter, heartbeat spiking up and rapidly thudding against your ribcage. Your eyes come into direct contact with the familiar shade of blonde hair and sun-kissed skin, only now he also has pink shades on and his hair has been pushed back with a headband. There’s a faint marking of red and blue at the side of his neck, your eyes enlarging at the realization that the markings formed into the shape of a butterfly. 

It makes him look drastically gorgeous and to see him appear like that in front of you now, makes you sick to your stomach. 

You watch as he stops laughing at Hoseok, lids dropping down and face contorting back to normal. You watch as his vision lands straight on you and how all the joy in his expression moments ago, contorts into utter surprise. 

You wonder if there’s a nearby bush you can hide yourself in. 

Sucking in a sharp inhale as he draws closer, a strained smile is plastered onto your lips, “Hi...” 

“Hey.” He playfully smiles, hands stuffed inside his short’s pockets. Compared to you, he doesn’t appear to be as frazzled, just merely intrigued. “I didn’t know you would be here.” 

The surprise is apparent in his voice too, “I was a last minute addition.” You clarify and he hums, sending an understanding smile in your direction. The air becomes mute between you for a split moment, right before Jimin comes rushing forward. 

The orange haired boy scratches the back of his head, “Taehyung, can you help me load the suitcases into the car? Hoseok’s going to check into the place soon.” 

“Oh yeah, sure thing.” He follows Jimin to Eunha’s car and Sunyi quickly grabs your arm soon after, ushering you closer to the group. 

After contemplating how long it’ll take to arrive, you decide on getting into the two cars and making your way over. The place you’ve chosen for your vacation is actually an area of land that Hoseok’s family has owned for several years and occasionally rent out to people in need for some time off. Sunyi has originally suggested you all visit there together at least once, but both yours and Eunha’s schedules were always too far off from ever actually making plans. 

Needlessly to say, you’re pretty excited. The opportunity right now is perfect for all of you and although the trip has taken a turn of events you’re not particularly fond of, you’re simply here to relax first and foremost. 

Slipping into Eunha’s passenger seat, her car consists of you along with Sunyi and Hoseok in the back. Jimin and Taehyung are with Jungkook in his black SUV, closely following behind. 

Hoseok has his phone planted against the side of his face, his lips pursued. “That’s strange.” 

There’s a crease in between his brows as he stares at the device.

“What is it?” Sunyi wonders. 

“The call’s not connecting.” He tries again, but the call cuts off, “I need to confirm that we’ll be arriving soon, but it’s like they don’t even have a signal.” 

You peer behind you as Hoseok continues to fiddle with his phone until Sunyi offers to try calling through hers instead. Hoseok takes the suggestion and tries again, but the attempt ends up failing as well and the distress is clear on his features. 

“This is so weird.” Hoseok scorns, scanning both of their phones. You assume that the connection problem has something to do with the line cutting off completely, so another idea sparks in your mind. 

“It's family owned, right? Why don’t you try calling your parents?” You propose, “They’ll probably know what’s going on.” 

Hoseok hums, “That’s not a bad idea.” He places a call in his own phone and patiently awaits. The sound of a woman resonates through the phone and Hoseok instantly recognizes her. 

“Hey Mom, it’s me.” He confirms, “Do you know what’s been happening at the lodge? I’ve been trying to call to check in but no one seems to be picking up.” 

You and Sunyi patiently wait for an answer, but Hoseok's dejected expression soon surfaces. 

“Oh...I see…Alright, thanks for letting me know.” He deeply sighs as the line cuts, facing the two of you with regret in his eyes. 

“Sorry guys, but the area’s been closed down because of a recent drought.” 

“What, really?” Sunyi asks right away, and Hoseok nods. You and Eunha let out a collective sigh. 

“Well that sucks.” She chimes, briefly looking back at the Hoseok and Sunyi, then you. “I guess the only thing we can do is turn around. Vacation time is over, folks.”

“Argh! I was so looking forward to this!” Sunyi rants and you groan in agreement. 

You’ve only started on this trip and it seems like whatever needed to go wrong, has gone wrong. You wonder if being around Taehyung is already bringing you misfortune again, but that thought clears up once your eyes fall upon a vast expanse of water. 

“....is that a beach?” 

Blinking, you point towards the grey sand covering the land, the black-blueish water next to creating waves. There’s small teal specks glittering in the water, something that makes you wonder if your eyes are playing tricks on you. 

Hoseok and Sunyi hum in acknowledgement and Eunha raises an intrigued eyebrow. “Why don’t we check it out?” 

“I don’t know…” Eunha whispers, “I’ve never seen this place around here before.” 

“Yeah and that water...” Sunyi narrows her eyes at the way it appears sparkling dark blue in the middle of the day, “Looks sorta of creepy…” 

“It does.” Hoseok whispers, sounding in disbelief. Lips thinning, your eyes stray around before they land on the large house near the shore. 

“Look! They even have shelter!” You point out, though your group still seems a little unimpressed. “How about we at least go down there and have a look, hm?” 

Eunha frowns, her hands tightening on the steering wheel, “Okay, but tell the guys too.” 

“Roger that.” Hoseok confirms, presumably calling one of them as he lifts his phone to his face. You observe the water again, honestly not seeing what all the fuss is about. 

“I guess it does look pretty.” Sunyi mentions and Eunha hums. 

“I really don’t want to drive all the way back, so I don’t think there’s any harm in checking it out.” 

You smile, glad there were on board with your idea. Truthfully, you were prepared to set up a tent right here and now just for the sake of getting a vacation, so you’re not really on par for questioning the place at the moment. 

~

It’s actually quite decent. 

After Hoseok explained the situation to his friends, they all agreed with you in at least seeing what it had to offer. And as it turns out, it’s a lot better than you would have initially imagined from far away. 

The house is warm and cozy, right next to the salty shore. They rent out rooms on a daily basis and the original ominous appearance of the ocean ends up being a purpose, the “unique theme” of the place that’s meant to draw in customers, as the generous owner remarks. You end up leasing three rooms in total - one of your trio and two for the guys - and everyone is content with the notion that their gracious vacation wasn’t on the loss of being cancelled due to a mere drought. 

Hoseok in particular, is ecstatic with the idea and this shows with his constant cheerfulness in his interactions with Sunyi, to the point where you eventually have to drag her into your shared room for some much needed rest. All of you settle in for the night, planning on resuming your blissful vacation in the morning. 

The crisp sun rises bright and early, a clear blue sky greeting you. All your friends are dressed in their swimming attire, ready to enjoy the most of the beach as they can. 

Hoseok runs and dives head first into the bluish waters, plunging into it through a huge splash. Instead of floating, he ends up sinking into the water and resembles something akin to a dead body, an action that has Sunyi bursting out laughing until he finally manages to poke his head out. 

Jimin and Jungkook are together, engaging in what you suppose to be a water splashing fight that Jungkook inherently seems to be winning. Eunha passes by them, keeping her head out of the water and spinning around to face you. 

“What are those two even doing?” She laughs, clearly watching in with you. You shrug from afar, finding shade underneath a giant tree and keeping your feet dipped in the chilling sea. “You sure you don’t want to come in? It’s really nice.” 

You shake your head right away, raising your legs, “The water’s really cold, I’ll come in once it gets warmer.” 

Eunha hums, “Okay, I’ll be here so just let me kno-” 

Her voice cuts off and all you see is a blur of water splash by you, two concerned faces emerging. 

“Y/N, are you okay?!” Jimin hurriedly questions, kneeling down at your thoroughly soaked form. You clench your teeth, preventing them from chattering in the midst of the freezing cold water sticking to your skin. 

“I’m fine.” You get up, attempting to shake off all of the excess water droplets as you do. Eunha pops out from behind you, holding onto your arm. 

“Here, let me take you inside.” 

“It’s alright.” You wave her off, “If I sit in the sun, my clothes will dry up.” 

“Are you sure? You might catch a cold, Y/N.” 

You shake your head, pointing towards the blazing sun, “It’s hot enough out here to cook an egg out here, I’ll be good.” 

Although wary, Eunha lets you get out of the shade into the warmth of the sun and slowly heads back in the water. Jimin pesters you with some apologies but you don’t take too mind with it. Truthfully, it was probably not the best decision to sit right beside a huge body of water if you didn’t intend on getting soaked. 

The decision ends up being a great one, since you can already feel your skin beginning to dry within minutes. However, that’s when you feel a shift in the sand, a heavy weight flopping conveniently right next to you. 

Taehyung is dressed in a blue beach shirt and colourful shorts, his peach pink shades still resting on the bridge of his nose. He looks like he’s just woken up, hair a bit disheveled and eyes lowered. 

The sound of a shutter catches your immediate attention, and you notice him squinting his eyes and sticking out his tongue as he continues to snap away images of the large body of water with his camera. 

“You still take pictures?” You reminiscence in a joking manner, the words blurting out without thought. Immediately, you contemplate if striking up a conversation was such a good idea, but you suppose it can’t do much harm if you’re going to be spending so much of your vacation with him. 

Though, you truthfully don’t expect him to twist around and place his camera down on the sand. 

“Well, you know me. Have to carry my memories around somehow.” He retorts with a smirk. The action draws a smile on your lips, his voice mimicking your playful manner. 

You point towards the water. “Don’t accidentally drop it though, it won’t be a great price to pay.” 

“I guess that’s when I’ll have to go fishing.” 

“You can barely swim.” He raises an eyebrow at you from that, “What? Those were your words.” 

A pout surfaces onto his lips, immediately correcting you in defense, “I’ve improved.” 

“You want to test out that theory?” Gesturing to the large body of water in front of you, Taehyung immediately hugs his camera closer to his form. 

“You’ll have to save both me and my camera if you really want an answer.” 

“Is that a way of saying you still can’t swim?” 

He frowns, “It’s a way of saying that I’ll need...some assistance. Just in case.” 

“Assistance in what? Drowning?” 

“No!” He immediately protests, “I can still float pretty well.” 

“Hm, sure.” 

Taehyung sighs, already knowing that you haven’t been fully convinced just yet. As a result, when the waves slowly push the water closer to you, he dips his feet into it for a split moment. He grins at the immediate result, cheekily glancing at you. 

You roll your eyes at his supposed accomplishment and he laughs, raising up his camera again to continue taking pictures of the scenery. The gesture seemingly spreads a genuine smile on your features, something you couldn’t have imagined he still had the ability to do. 

Your smile instantly drops and that sick feeling begins to swirl in the out of your stomach again. You get up with a deep breath, calling it a day and heading back to the cabin. 

Yet in the midst of your action, you don’t notice how Taehyung’s no longer capturing pictures of the rare waters. Instead, his camera remains on the ground, his gaze following your disappearing form. 

~

“I think you should just go for it.” His friend leans back in his chair, currently in the midst of eating through a take-out box. “Be honest with her.” 

Taehyung rolls his eyes, “Like that’s going to actually work.” He picks out a piece of Jungkook’s fried chicken and sighs. 

“I think Jungkook’s right, Tae.” Jimin plops down next to him, “You said it yourself, you felt like this was a chance to fix things, right?” 

Taehyung lets out another sigh. He did say that, but that thought only sparked within him once news broke that you would be joining them on this trip. Initially, he assumed that it would be a bad idea, that there would be too much friction between the two of you and it would cross the limit of being unbearable again. But he can’t help but think about running into you at the beach and how you clicked right back in, like nothing had ever been wrong between you. 

It’s made him consider a lot of things, one of which he wonders how he can outright declare that he’s still in love with you, how he thinks fate is on his side for once and telling him to set things right now before it’s too late. 

“Maybe you guys are right…” 

“Of course we are.” Jimin quips, cheekily smiling as Taehyung pouts. 

“I’ll at least apologize to her…” He urgently declares, already snatching up his grey hoodie and throwing it over his head. He quickly peers at the window outside, the sun having already set and a dark forecast slowly beginning to take over the sky. 

“Good luck Tae!” Jimin exclaims, watching him hurry out the door. 

After spending a majority of your first moments in bed twisting and turning with no luck of falling unconscious, you find yourself strolling along where the ocean water meets the dry sand. The cool breeze passing by gives off the salty scent of the ocean and the night sky makes the area’s unique appearance even more entrancing from broad daylight. 

Leaning down closer to the splashing waves, your eyes attach onto the way the bright algae glows within the waters, appearing like fireflies fluttering underground. You reach out to faintly touch a piece, observing the way the teal orb glows brightly within your hands before getting swept up by the currents once again. 

You smile, letting your hand splash around in the water. 

“Mind if I join you?” 

Your breath hitches and you nearly topple over into the giant seaway, but an arm quickly grabs onto you before you do. 

“S-Sorry.” Taehyung stutters, sheepishly staring down at the ground, “I didn’t mean to-” 

“It’s okay.” You simply say, having steadied yourself thanks to his help. You continue to play around with the water, a little unsure at what to say with his sudden appearance. 

He eventually speaks up, but it's with a suggestion that has your brows raising. “Do you want to go swimming?” 

“Now?” 

He nods, pointing over the dark waters, “I didn’t get a chance to swim this morning.” He gets up, swatting away remains of the grey sand from his shorts and reaches his hands out for you to take. 

You shake your head, “I really don’t want to.” 

“Aw come on!” A giant pout crosses his lips, voice raising up a pitch, “You’re still no fun!” 

Your mouth drops wide open, offense written all over your features. Gazing back at the water, you suppose it would be better than to swim during the hours of hot sunlight, so you opt out for getting up as well. 

“Okay.” You point an accusing finger at him, “But for your kind information, I am tons of fun.” 

Taehyung smiles at you like you’re going to have a hard time living up to that statement and that only fuels your need to prove him wrong. You’re dressed in a simple sundress and you suppose it should be enough to swim in, but by the time you turn around Taehyung’s already taken off his shirt and diving head straight into the waters. 

“I thought you couldn’t swim?!” You shout in disbelief, rushing to meet him halfway into the body of water. It’s cool temperature immediately spikes a trail of goosebumps down your arms and legs, but you bite back the shivers when your eyes come into contact with his smug expression. 

“Told you I could at least float.” He giggles as you come closer, huffing against the resistance that surrounds you waist down until you finally reach him. He points towards the pit of the sea once you do, drawing your attention to the sparkling algae that has begun to spiral around your feet. 

“Wow.” You whisper, eyes racing in pure awe as they begin to collect. Taehyung smiles, scooping up a handful while you’re occupied with gazing at the bright lights and left unsuspicious. Before you know it, he’s tossed them onto you and they stick to your wet strands of hair. 

“What the-?” As you attempt to get them out, Taehyung loudly laughs. “Can you stop laughing and help me??” 

“Sorry.” He still giggles once he reaches out and takes one out, “I thought they would look nice on you.” 

“I’m exactly not sure what part of luminous algae you thought would look nice on me.” You pout as he continues to pluck and unwind them from your hair, but then he grins. 

“I meant in a pretty way.” He takes out a piece that’s managed to get behind your ear, leaning forward. You suddenly blink, realizing he was inches away from you and that even though the water was icy cold, your temperature has only spiked up. 

“Y/N?” Taehyung questions, wondering why you’ve suddenly shriveled up as he flicks the last piece away. You peer up at his eyes and that’s when it hits him. 

The perfect opportunity. 

He opens his mouth, about to spew everything on his mind before he loses his chance. 

Lightning cracks. 

You and Taehyung immediately push away from each other, heartbeats racing at the sudden sizzle left in the sand far from you. Staring up at the sky in terror, the clouds begin to swarm together and that’s when Taehyung grabs onto you, shaking your form instantly. 

“We have to get out of here!” He yells, but another flash strikes through the sky and is followed by a series of bulleting raindrops. It doesn’t take you another moment to nod at his words, following through with getting back to land as far as possible. 

Taehyung lets go of you.

It happens so fast that you can barely register it, whipping around to see Taehyung miles apart from you. He shouts something across from the water, but by the time you pick up on what he’s trying to say to you, his entire body plunges right into the water. 

“TAEHYUNG!” You scream, fiercely pushing against the water to get to him. The rain falling from the sky obscures your vision, but you keep going until you reach the spot he was sucked away at, glancing back and forth for any sign of him. 

“TAEHYUNG!” You yell out again when you fail to locate him, diving straight into the deep waters. The salt stings at your eyes and your blood runs thin at the lightning above honing down on you, but you discover a familiar face buried by the depths of the ocean and you don’t think twice in grasping onto his arm.

Holding onto your escaping breath, you propel your legs back up higher and gasp once you make contact with the surface. Taehyung’s form limps against your body for a moment, but your grasp on him instantly loosens. 

“Wha-” You breath, blinking away your clouded vision. A rumble of thunder echoes through your ears, yet the rain starts to slow it’s rapid pace, falling down gently on top of you until it completely comes to a halt. Glancing up in confusion, the dark grey clouds start to drift away from each other and eventually, leave the night sky all together. 

You shake your head, ignoring the pulsing sensation pounding through in it and blink your eyes again to find Taehyung. It’s easy to spot him this time, but his leaning bareback faces you instead. 

“Taehyung!” You shout in relief, arms splashing closer to him. He raises up a hand, leaving the other left to cover his face. 

“Don’t!” 

You freeze mid-way, hands dropping down. 

“T-Taehyung?” 

Tilting your head, he doesn’t budge. Although the rain has stopped and the lightning isn’t buzzing above your head anymore, you have to hold onto your arms to stop them from shivering. You attempt once more to get closer to him, but the throbbing in your head rapidly increases and before you know it, you’re the one sinking into the water this time. 

You can barely hear Taehyung when he shouts for you, you can barely feel him grab onto your trembling form and pull you out of your water, you can barely register being in his arms, slowly losing consciousness bit by bit. 

Among all this, you can barely make out the shining blue tail that sticks out of the water as he desperately swims back to shore. 

It’s still pitch dark by the time you come to. 

Your eyes flutter open at the sound of the tides continuing to push against the shore, mind spinning from the fabricated recollection of events that went down. Your very first instinct is to harshly cough, bubbles of congested water forming up from the seam of your lips. 

A hand gently touches your back, warily patting it as all water makes it way out. You heavily breathe, shaking away any remains of drowsiness. 

“T-Thanks Taehyung.” You manage to get out, shifting in the sand to face him. His hand instantly comes over to shield your eyes, his voice wavering. 

“W-Wait.” He stutters, “Don’t-...Don’t freak out.” 

You frown at what he could have meant at that, but then his hand drops down and your eyes widen into large saucers. 

You open your mouth to scream.

“Y/N!” Taehyung pleads, sighing when you pause mid-way, fear filling your eyes by the minute. His lips set into a firm line, and he gazes at you with desperation. “Please, just…” He raises up his hands, “Just calm down.” 

“W-What?” You breathe heavily, “W-What happened to y-you?”

He stares down at the palms of his hands in dismay, “I-I don’t know…” 

You gulp, nodding. Truthfully it’s difficult to believe what you are seeing before your eyes. 

Because right in front of you is Taehyung, but not Taehyung at the same time. 

His blonde hair has been completely coloured into a deep sapphire shade, the ends of it longer and curling at the nape of his neck. His eyes are no longer the warm brown hue you’ve become so familiar with, but now a striking green that almost appears cat-like. Along his neck, arms and torso are small strange teal aligned pockets, all of which trail down to his waist which has the most notable change. 

A long aqua blue coloured fish tail has completely engulfed the portion his legs used to once take up. 

It’s almost overwhelming for you to completely register. He lappears so strikingly different that you wouldn’t have recognized him hadn’t it been for the familiarity of his tone or touch. 

“Taehyung…” You whisper, having finally accepted reality. He seems to notice that you’ve calmed down, relief etching onto his features. “H-How did this all happen?” 

“I’m not sure,” He sighs, “One second I’m trying to grab you and get out of the water before the lightning hits us and the next, I’m being pulled down into the bottom of the ocean.” 

“When I came back up...this is what I looked like.” He stares at his hands again, unable to properly understand what he was either. 

You nod, eyeing his tail again, “You used that to swim…?” 

He hums and moves it for a second, causing you to flinch. There’s specks of gray sand starting to stick to it, presumably from him having to use it on land, “Surprisingly it helped me get back faster.” 

“I see…” You get up, dusting the sand off of yourself. You step closer to him, examining it further. 

“Don’t stare at it like that.” 

Your eyes widen, “Why?” You reach out to touch the new limb and he instantly flinches, moving it away from you. 

“Because it’s weird!” He flaps it around in the sand for a while, “I don’t even know how to properly use it, for all I know I could just-” 

He’s too late in explaining because the motion he’s used has managed to slap you across the face with the tail. 

“I’m so sorry, I didn’t-” This time it hits your legs and you fall down onto the sand, resulting in Taehyung becoming even more apologetic. 

“Okay, okay! Just stop moving for a second!” You protest, raising up your hands against it. Taehyung freezes the tail in mid-air, staring at you like he was on command and awaiting further directions. 

“I think we should focus on how to get you out of here.” You pinch the bridge of your nose, squeezing your eyes shut, “The others will be awake in the morning and I think trying to explain that you’re part fish is going to be a lot harder than it is.” 

“How do we do that?” Taehyung desperately asks, peering up at you from his spot in the sand. A thought sparks inside your mind, but you stare at him in dismay. 

“I have an idea...but I don’t think either of us are going to like it.” 

~

“I’m surprised Y/N.” Taehyung proclaims, “This is really romantic.” 

You can barely make out a clear answer, huffing and wheezing at the same time. Leaning against the wall, you attempt to catch your breath. 

“Hm? Y/N? Can you hear me?” Taehyung tilts his head and leans closer to you, but you jerk your head up and scoff at him. 

“Give me a minute, will you?! You’re not exactly a box of feathers!” 

“Well that was kind of harsh.” Taehyung pouts, reclining onto you and resting his head against your shoulder. You tighten your hold on him, careful not to let go of his new slippery side that’s been a pain in your rear for the past fifteen minutes. 

“I will leave you here and then you’ll have to flap your way back to your own room, you fish!” 

Taehyung gasps like you’ve just sworn at him but then you purposely loosen your grip on his tail and he instantly freaks out, “Alright! Just get me back in one piece!” 

“I’m trying.” You huff again, taking another step on the enormous spiraling staircase. You didn’t realize him and the guys wanted the top floor of this place so badly, and unfortunately it’s a decision you’ll have to pay the consequences for now. 

After an exhausting trip of losing your footing a billion times and having to repeatedly catch your breath, you make it to Taehyung and Jimin’s shared room. Fortunately, Jimin’s completely passed out by the time you do make it up there and you attempt to keep that way, watching your step as much as you can. 

Unfortunately, the man currently whispering in your ear is not helping much. 

“I can’t sleep here! What if Jimin wakes up in the morning and discovers my tail?!” 

“It’s better than taking you to my room that has three people staying in it!” You harshly whisper back, plopping him down onto his bed. Though you forgot how stubborn Taehyung can be, especially when he refuses to separate from you and as a result, drags you on top of him. 

“Ow!” You scold him, glaring down at the huge smirk he holds. The position you’re in doesn’t help the situation much either and you attempt to get yourself off considering the fact that you’re sitting on top of his scaly tail.

However, that’s when Taehyung’s bright green eyes narrow and for a second, you suck in your breath. You know he looks considerably different now, but you haven’t been able to pinpoint why he almost feels like a different person at moments, especially when he stares at you. 

There’s something incredibly alluring about him, something you haven’t figured out until you realize you’re leaning closer to him and hovering right above his lips. You snap out of it right away and by the looks of it, so does Taehyung. 

With a quick goodbye and a rough toss of a blanket over his head to cover up his strange appearance, you rush out of his room and shut the door. Spinning around, a hand presses against your racing heartbeat and you swipe away the sweat that has built against your temples. 

“You really expect me to wear that?” 

He points to the lengthy black skirt you’ve managed to rummage out of your suitcase, a floral design lining the edges. He’s seated on the side of his bed, already dressed in a long-sleeved white shirt that covers the imprints in his skin. 

You hum, “How else are we going to cover that?” 

You gestures towards the large blueish-green tail that sits on the ground, spread out and already taking up a large majority of the floor beneath his bed. 

Taehyung deeply sighs, letting out a groan before reaching out his hands in dismay. “Fine.” 

You smile once he takes it, attempting to balance himself enough to put it on. You immediately reach out and let him steady himself using your shoulders, helping him tug it on. 

“How come I got a fishtail and you didn’t?” He whines, growing frustrated with the utterly useless tail to have on land. You stifle back a laugh and he glares at you. “You’re enjoying this way too much.” 

“I’m not.” You truthfully admit, aiding him in tying the two connecting strands of the skirt. “I just didn’t think I’d see the day where you’d be wearing one of my skirts.” 

“It beats being half-naked.” Taehyung retorts, glancing down at his tail, “Even though the naked part doesn’t even look human.” 

You sigh and roll your eyes, close enough to helping him finish dressing. A low knock captures your attention and you freeze, whipping around at the door. 

“I-Is someone-” You’re too late, because not a moment is spared as the door comes barging open. You catch a faint hint of orange tucked away in a white hoodie and you step in front of Taehyng right away, unease crossing your features. 

Jimin pokes his head in, “Hey, I-” Your voice dies out when Eunha and Sunyi step in behind him, closely followed by Jungkook and Hoseok. 

“Oh.” Eunha says, staring at you and Taehyung. To be quite honest, the situation itself does seem strange - you’re standing in front of Taehyung and covering him up as he struggles to tug on one of your skirts in your room. 

You have no clue how to explain any of this. 

“Y/N?” Sunyi peers at you from behind Eunha, confusion maring her as well. You anxiously smile, quickly whipping up a flimsy excuse. 

“I-I was just helping him! You know, w-with finding some clothes because...uh….he lost his suitcase!” 

Eunha nods and you let out a low sigh. Taehyung emerges from behind you, a questioning stare in his eyes. 

“What brings all of you here?” 

“Woah.” Jungkook exclaims, “What happened to you??”

“What do you mean?” Taehyung questions, clearly having forgotten the striking colour his hair is and the shifted hue of his eyes. 

“U-Uh he’s been trying out a new hair colour! And has contacts!” You throw a glance at Taehyung with a nervous laugh and he turns into stone, finally realizing the error in his appearance. 

“Okay…” Eunha mutters, warily staring at Taehyung. Hoseok clears his voice, answering the former’s question. 

“We were going to head over to the beach again.” He points towards the window, “You guys down to swim?” 

You and Taehyung exchange a glance and for a moment, you could have swore you saw him visibly gulp. 

“I-I think we’ll pass guys…but thanks for the offer!” 

“You sure?” Eunha steps forward, concern on her. “Y/N, is everything okay?” 

You bite back the truth, “Yeah! I’m going to just stay back with Taehyung, so I’ll be fine.” 

“Really?” Sunyi asks, peering at said man. Something twinkles in her eyes and she places a hand on Eunha’s shoulder, bringing her away. 

“We should listen to Y/N, Eunha.” She appears baffled with Sunyi actions at first, but then the latter winks and she lets out a soft “Oh..” 

Eunha shrugs with a smile, “I guess we’ll leave you to it then.” 

You nod and one by one they exit the room. Once the coast is clear, you let out an audible sigh, pressing a hand against your chest. 

“That was close.” You turn to Taehyung, “We need to be careful.” 

He’s sitting on the bed now, arms crossed and a huge pout on his lips. 

He looks like a child that's sulking. 

“What?” 

“I miss my legs.” He moves his tail for a moment before letting it flop back down onto the ground. 

You sigh, growing weary already, “Let’s just see if there’s something we can do here.” 

Rummaging around the area, you seek to find anything that you can occupy yourself with for the next couple of hours. Although you had declined the offer of joining your friends for the sake of Taehyung’s situation, a part of you is growing increasingly dismayed with the fact that you have to do this in the first place. 

You were supposed to be on vacation - but now you’re stuck with the person you didn’t want to be with and have no hope of being able to relax. 

“I hate this.” Taehyung states from behind you, somehow being able to communicate your collective thoughts with only three words. You let out another sigh, revealing a stack of cards you found near Jimin’s suitcase. 

Taehyung’s still in the same state, brows furrowed and bottom lip jutting out. 

“I can’t promise it’ll get better but at least we made it back in one piece.” You offer, throwing the card stack onto his bed and flopping down beside him. “Now play a game with me before my mind explodes from boredom.” 

That luckily seems to bring a smile out from him and you begin to shuffle the cards, but then a slimy texture touches your legs and you immediately back away. 

“Can you put that somewhere else?” You gesture to his tail that brushes against you, but Taehyung innocently shrugs and grins. 

“It’s attached to me, there’s nothing I can do about that.” 

The more he smiles, the more you glare at him, “Fine, but maintain some distance at least, fish.”

He scoffs at the sound of the nickname you’ve adopted for his situation, but thankfully obliges so that it’s not all over the place. 

~

After having countless card game sessions with Taehyung (to which he won most of and you had to endure a plethora of his cheeky smirks as a result), the rest of your friends finally make it back. You’re pleasantly surprised to find out that Eunha and Sunyi took the liberty of bringing food as well, since you were worried that if you left to go eat something Taehyung would find some way to slip out of his bed and bounce around on the ground from his lack of being mobile-

That wasn’t supposed to be a pun. 

“We brought sushi.” Sunyi says, setting the trays down on the picnic table at the terrace of the cabin. It’s a nice place to dine together, small fairy lights brightening up the high roof and clearing out the now darkening sky. 

“I hope that’s okay.” Eunha hesitates, but you shake your head. You weren’t truly a huge fan of the dish since it was essentially rice wrapped up in vegetables and meat, but at this point you’re so utterly famished that you can’t bring yourself to care. Reaching over to grab the remaining bags, Hoseok and Jungkook come over to help you and you’re soon having dinner underneath the lights. 

However, that’s when Jimin pops up. 

“Hey guys, has anyone seen Tae?” He twists around, “He wasn’t in our room when I left.” 

“I think I saw him sitting down at the reception.” Jungkook mentions, “I thought he was going to come soon.” 

“Oh.” Jimin says, pursuing his lips. You raise an eyebrow at the information, already rising from your seat. 

“You guys keep eating. I’ll go see if I can find him.” 

“Do you need any help?” Eunha questions, but you shake your head. 

“Don’t worry, it won’t take long.”

Eunha nods and sits back down into her seat as you scurry off. You quickly climb down the stairs from the terrace, heading into the reception hall. 

Peering back and forth, it’s entirely empty. The appearance throws you off and for a moment, you assume it would be best to turn around and search elsewhere - but that’s when you hear a low groan. 

You swivel around, opening the door to a nearby room. 

Your eyes land on Taehyung right away. 

He’s on the ground, appearing to be struggling with lifting himself up from the edge of a table that he has a threatening tight grip on. At the sound of the door abruptly opening, he looks up, eyes widening. 

You rush over in an instant, holding onto his arm and helping him up. Guilt overtakes your features when you realize that you had completely forgotten about him up until this point, but Taehyung fortunately seems to notice your remorse. 

“Hey, don’t look so upset. I was actually doing fine until I accidentally got pushed into this room by some couple walking by, so it was kind of my fault for getting stuck.” He casually explains, but you freeze in your tracks and stare at him. 

“Your fault…?” 

“Yeah?” He stares at you, not really understanding why you look so concerned. You shake your head, focusing on getting him out right now instead. 

Making your way back to the terrace, Taehyung halts you in your steps. “Wait, how am I supposed to..?” 

He gestures to how you’re basically carrying him like a dead body, his whole weight limping onto you and the amphibian parts of him lazily dragging against the ground. His point does stand to reason and you suppose you didn’t really think this through before coming to aid him. 

Your eyes narrow onto his hands, an idea suddenly popping into your mind. 

“Should we just hold hands then?”

His brows raise, like he hadn’t been expecting you to offer that out of all things. When his speechlessness takes too long, you reach out and grab hold of him right away. He nearly slips and tightens his grip on your arm, leaning half of his weight onto you. 

“N-no one’s going to get the wrong idea, right?” Taehyung quietly laughs, but you’re more focused on the way that this position puts a lot more pressure on you. So you merely nod in response, trying your hardest not to collapse against having to hold onto him like this. 

Unfortunately, you forget the crucial fact that you’re walking into a room full of people aware of the history between the two of you. It draws out an array of spiked brows and agape mouths, but you nonchalantly help him sit and flop down next to him, nearly sinking from the sheer relief of not having your shoulder and arm be broken off. 

You eventually engage in conversation with Eunha and Sunyi, who persistently keep eyeing the man sitting next to you occasionally in between. You wonder if you should clarify to them the actual situation that’s been going on, but you think you’ve spoken too soon when a scream from behind you spikes up the hair on your body. 

Whipping around, Taehyung has his hands on either side of his face and he glances at the food in front of him in hysteria. 

You grab onto his shoulder instantly, “Taehyung, what’s wrong?” 

“H-HOW COULD IT BE?!” He picks up a roll of sushi, eyeing it in horror, “HOW COULD THEY DO SUCH A THING?!?!” 

“What are you talking about??” 

“THIS!” He gestures to the entire table, scrambling away from it and you at the same time, “They’ve cut them up into tiny pieces and wrapped them up in rice?! It’s horrible!!” 

You’re prepared to ask a million questions about his absurd reaction, but then you catch a glimpse of what exactly he’s referring to and suddenly, everything begins to make sense. 

The sushi has seafood in it. 

Taehyung looks like he’s on the verge of crying, fear filling him at the prospect of just sitting at the table. 

“H-How could they…YOU WERE A FAMILY OF FIVE! Now you’re here and your brother is too! How could they put you two beside each other when one of you has been fried?!?” 

You wince as he whispers towards one certain dish, not really distinguishing between the pieces so easily until he mentions it. However, that’s when you catch a glimpse of the entire table, the faces of your close friends informing you that you weren’t really doing such a great job at keeping his situation under wraps. 

Quickly reaching out, you begin to collect the seafood contained ones. You then turn around and hand them over to a confused Eunha, asking her to take them away because of Taehyung. Although you get many questions thrown at you from the reason and why Taehyung was acting up so much, you simply state that it was a result of a really bad allergy and that the food needed to go. 

More like I’ve-turned-into-a-fish-and-now-seeing-them-as-food-is-sad allergy, but you decide to keep your mouth shut about that personal opinion. 

Thankfully, Eunha reacts faster to your request that you had expected and all the seafood filled sushi is long discarded of. You then focus your efforts on trying to calm down Taehyung, who seems to respond to your eventual suggestion of seeing alive fish later at the shore to calm himself down. 

Taking a deep sigh, you slump down in your seat. It was getting harder and harder to manage this and you were beginning to wonder if there was even a way out of it, because so far the situation has just remained hopeless in front of both of your eyes. 

“Great to see you’re all having fun out here.” 

You turn towards the entrance of the terrace to see a middle-aged man in a tourist shirt and shorts, a pair of sunglasses resting on the bridge of his nose. He warmly smiles, standing at the front of your table. 

He introduces himself, “My name is Minho and I run this place. I thought I’d drop by to see how you’re all liking it so far.” 

Taking turns introducing your group members, Jungkook offers for him to settle down next to him at the table and the man cheerily obliges, darting questions back and forth about your stay. He’s surprised to hear that you weren’t originally planning on coming, instead derailed by your foiled vacation plans. 

“Yeah, we thought it was pretty weird looking at first but then we took a closer look and it turned out to be nice.” Hoseok explains, laughing a bit, “Honestly it seems better then where we were originally supposed to go.” 

“It’s a special place.” The man remarks tenderly, eyes crinkling, “Beautiful, but full of mysteries and wonder.” 

“Mysteries and wonder?” Jimin repeats and Minho hums. 

“Have you folks heard about the legend?” You shake your head and he looks genuinely surprised, as if the information should have been prior knowledge. “Well, let me tell you that you haven’t even begun to understand where you are just yet then.” 

“Many years ago, this place was inhabited by a couple.” Minho speaks in a low storytelling tone, “The man and woman loved each other very much, and were hoping to spend the rest of their lives by the sea together.” 

“However, one day the man left to go fishing and never came back. The woman was left all alone and in worry, prayed every night for his safe return.” 

“Ultimately the man never returned and his body was later discovered in the sea. It was presumed he had drowned and the women fell into a deep sorrow, feeling betrayed and abandoned by the one person who said he would never leave her.” 

“The moon heard her call and was vexed by her desperate pleas of his return, so it cursed her to roam the corners of the very place he drowned in - the sea.” 

The entire table is dead silent and Minho drops the one fact that has your eyes widening. 

“They call it, the legend of the mermaid.” Minho turns, pointing to the intriguing appearance of the sea, “That’s why the water is darker and the sand has turned grey, because it’s believed her anguish still remains deep within the ocean.” 

You and Taehyung make eye contact in an instant and Jimin tugs at the man’s sleeve. 

“D-Does that mean this place is cursed?” 

The man chuckles, “Of course not! It’s just a legend! Didn’t you hear me say that before I told you the story?!” 

“It’s an interesting legend, I didn’t know this beach could be so meaningful.” Eunha remarks and Minho smiles at her. 

“Ah, see! She gets it!” 

Eunha returns his smile and Minho continues to reassure Jimin, who still seems startled with the new information. Meanwhile, you gaze at Taehyung, wondering to yourself how much of that story was truly a mere legend. 

“I swear, you only care about yourself!” You spit out, “If you didn’t want to live together then why did you say yes??” 

“Because you wanted it!” He shouts back, “I wanted you to be happy! I’ve always wanted you to be happy!” His once warm irises are dripping with spite, “But as of recently, living with you has turned into an actual nightmare.”

There’s a tense, held silence looming in the air. You’re in a similar state as him, the exhaustion keeping a dreadful grip on your bones. 

“How else am I supposed to talk to you then?” There’s hoarseness in your voice, soft before it spikes up, “You never tell me anything and act like everything is okay all the time! I can’t know if you don’t talk to me, Tae!” 

He shakes his head, appearing defeated. You’re expecting something, some hidden spark of hope that you can manage to work this out. But that immediately shatters once he reaches for his bag. 

A deep exhale leaves his lips, like he’s grown tired for too long. 

“I can’t take this anymore, Y/N.” 

“W-What?” You watch him grab his shoes, placing them onto the ground to slip his feet into, “So that’s it, huh? You’re not going to try to fix things with me and instead just run away?” 

“No, I’m not.” He glances up at you, a seething glare in his eyes that takes you aback, “I’m going to break up with you before I do.” 

You can only stare as he grabs his jacket on his way out, the door harshly slamming behind him. Water unconsciously begins to well up in your eyes and you slump down onto your knees, left completely alone in the room. 

“Taehyung?” 

“H-Huh?” He blinks, body unconsciously rolling over to you. You’re tucked in your bed, leaning down to see sleeping on the make-shift bed you’ve made on the ground for him after he had called you and complained he wasn’t able to properly sleep. 

“You were mumbling in your sleep.” A low yawn passes by your lips and you rub your eye, “Are you comfortable down there?” 

“Kind of. It’s been difficult sleeping like this.” He shuffles around a bit. 

“I’m sure it’s not too bad if you try sleeping on your side.” You lie down, facing him, “Just let me know if you need an extra blanket or two.”

“It’s not that....” He mumbles, letting out a sigh. 

You raise an eyebrow, “Then what is it?” 

“This.” He admits, turning to look at you. The moment dips into a steady silence and you uncomfortably shift, wondering why he was simply just staring at you. 

“I don’t get it.” 

“This.” He points to his eyes, “I don’t have eyelids anymore.”

“What?” You jump out of bed, shifting closer to him, “How do you not have-” 

Your eyes land right above his foreign green orbs and sure enough, the skin has become transparent. “I can’t close my eyes when I sleep anymore, so I just stare at the ceiling until I pass out.” 

“Wow that’s….” You have no clue what to say to that.

“It’s okay, go back to sleep.” Taehyung whispers, “I’ll have to wait until I can fall asleep again.” 

“Alright…” You bring your blanket backup to cover yourself, but occasionally your eyes drift over to Taehyung. It’s a little unnerving to find out he doesn’t have eyelids anymore and is practically a fish at this point, but you decide to let the thought slip away when you begin to ponder on more recent events. 

Namely, the legend. Although Minho had told your group as a way to draw out more meaning from the place you were at, you wonder if there was some way to figure out how to get Taehyung’s human appearance back from it, such as a gap in the story. But the most you can come with at the moment is simply retrieving the man’s body back for the mermaid to realize she wasn’t abandoned, but you have no clue how that’s going to help Taehyung. 

Maybe throwing him into the sea again and waiting around for a thunderstorm to take place would be more effective…

Your absurd thoughts are caught off guard at the sound of a low cough, “If you’re really having a hard time sleeping, I can just take you back to your room, you know?” 

He doesn’t answer you and you contort your brows, rolling over in bed, “Taehyung?” 

The very first thing your eyes land on is how he’s crouched down, lifting himself up on his shaking arms. You immediately throw your covers off and slide down, grabbing onto him. “Taehyung!” 

A chain of rough coughs greet you again and your eyes flicker when he begins to harshly gasp. Searching around, you notice that his usual crystal blue tail has dissolved into the shade of lime green and how the small openings on his ribs have begun to rapidly open and close. 

Your eyes widen and you catch a glimpse of the window for a moment, eyes surveying the ocean. Quicking grabbing a hold of Taehyung’s arm, you loop it over your neck and tug him up with a grunt, letting him rest his weight on you. 

“Hold on Taehyung.” You hastily get out of your room, heading out the hallway. The spiral of staircases tests your patience greatly on the way down, but when Taehyung’s head lolls to the side and he becomes completely unresponsive, you don’t give it a second thought. 

The moment your feet meet the grey sand again, you attempt to accelerate your speed. The extra dead weight doesn’t help in that matter, but nonetheless you rush towards the water and hold your breath. 

The icy temperature immediately spreads over your skin, drenching your cozy pajamas in an instant. You hurriedly poke your head out to the shore and look down towards the water, feeling Taehyung's limp hand sink down and slip away from your grasp. 

He lets out a loud exhale moments later, panting once he’s able to meet the shore as well. He glances in your direction, a look of surprise and relief flooding him immediately. 

“H-How did you know...?” 

You softly smile, “I assumed staying on land for too long doesn’t help much with your situation.” 

“Thanks.” He deeply breathes with a grin, pushing back his sapphire hair. You whirl around, about to head back before it gets too cold until you feel a jerk on your wrist. 

“Wait.” 

You turn to face him, “What?” 

“I-I don’t want to be alone here.” He whispers, quiet enough for you to barely hear it, “It’s scary.” 

Your lips form into a pout, thinking he was being absurd for a moment. However, your eyes begin to roam around, taking in how it’s pitch black outside, making the water appear more like ink by the minute. Save for the light sounds of the tides, it’s also dead silent. 

“Fine - but I can’t stay in the water for long, it’s freezing.” You honestly reply, your shoulders already starting to tremble. Taehyung nods in agreement, swimming over to you in an instant. You don’t expect him to encase his arms around you right away, pulling you flush against him. 

“Hold your breath.” He reminds you and you timidly nod, hoping he doesn’t notice the way your complexion has tinted rose. Luckily he doesn’t when he dives into the water, swimming at a speed that you barely get up to alone with your legs. Your eyes watch in fascination as his long tail moves in unison with his body, lighting up the dark ocean with it’s bright blue hue. 

Taehyung ends up taking you to a landscape of rocks near the shore, a place you wouldn’t have else found if you tried swimming there all by yourself. He hastily gets you out of the waters, letting you inhale as much air as possible just like you had done with him in the sea, before he remains at the edge of rocks and watches you settle into the small opening.

The temperature has subsided and is a lot better than the waters below you, but Taehyung seems to be at ease right in the centre of it. In comparison to before, now you can get a broad view of the ocean and all the little ripples that pass by the dark tides, the moon illuminating each and every wave with a pearly hue. 

“Ah-choo!” You sniffle, covering your mouth. Taehyung spins around, eyes widening. 

“Are you cold?” He immediately asks, but you shake your head. 

“I’m alrig-AH-CHOO!” 

Taehyung grins, “Doesn’t sound like it.” He latches onto the edge and lifts himself up, half of his blue tail still remaining in the water. Taking the bottom of his shirt, he tugs it over his head and places the soaked material onto the side, facing you. 

“W-What are you doing?” You immediately ask, but he glances at you in confusion. 

“What? I’m a lot warmer when I’m not wearing wet clothes.” He extends his arm and gently pushes you closer to him, “Now come over here, will you?” 

You pout but eventually oblige when a third sneeze leaves your body. It’s a little strange to be snuggling up to him like this after so long, but old habits eventually sink in once Taehyung places his hand firmly against your waist and your rest your head against his shoulder. 

You watch the tides hit against each other, roaring louder as the wind around begins to pick up. Unconsciously you loop your arms around Taehyung, not noticing the small smile that tugs on his features as you do. 

Eyes drifting over to the radiant moon, a question sits at the tip of your tongue. “What did you think about the legend Minho told us? The one about the cursed mermaid?” 

“I thought it was sad.” Taehyung confesses, “Instead of trying to help the mermaid with her grief, the moon made her suffer for the rest of her life.” 

You hum, “She never got to see the man again and ended up stuck in the place that took his life.” A cascade of shivers runs down your body, “I wonder if the legend could help us get you back to normal.” 

“I highly doubt it.” Taehyung stiffly chuckles, “Maybe after this vacation is over, I’ll spend the rest of my life in the ocean too.” 

“Please don’t.” You whisper, not wanting him to live out the same unfortunate fate, “The woman was cursed because the man’s death left her all alone. I don’t want you to feel the same.” 

Although you can’t see it, a soft smile casts itself onto Taehyung’s lips. It remains even as your lids begin to droop down, your head occasionally tilting to the side. When it completely lolls over, Taehyung separates from you, gently placing you against a smooth patch of rock that you instinctively curl up on at contact. 

He lowers himself into the waters, shoulders poking out as he glances up at the bright moon shining down on you. Pivoting around, he watches you completely get lulled into sleep by the comfortable sounds of the ocean ripples, a fond gaze running deep in his sea green eyes. 

Months later after breaking up with you, Taehyung returns back to the apartment the two of you once upon a time shared. There’s a clutter of open suitcases and things covered in bubble wrap, presumably you’re doing after you declared to him that you’ll be moving out soon and that he should begin packing his own things as well. 

It’s strange for him to enter an apartment that has countless memories woven into it, from the way he was so used to sharing his time, his room and even his bed with you. Now the apartment falls short of all of that, remains of what could have been left behind when he opens the door into the bedroom. 

Your things are all gone. Long removed and tided away. It’s just his own belongings that remain within the four walls anymore, seemingly the only thing left occupying the room. 

He’s all alone now, abandoned underneath the moonlight that peeks through the once joint window. 

~

You wake up the next morning to see Taehyung peering at the rising sun, a deep crease in between his brows. It takes you waving your hand erractively to draw his attention away, his eyes beaming up at your sudden awakening. After asking you if you were okay to go into the waters in pajamas again, you loop your arms around his neck and hold on for dear life once his head dips into the ocean, swimming back to shore at a racing speed. 

Meeting up with the rest of your friends, Eunha and Sunyi take the liberty of persuading you into swimming with them, not adamant about you refusing after last time. With one concerned look at Taehyung, the latter smiles and tells you to carry on after finding a giant blanket and spot in the grey sand to keep himself covered. 

However once you’re in the water, you can already see him sulking from a mile away. 

“Why don’t you come in?” You ask, swimming over to where he’s seated. The pout on his lips only grows more from your request, dejectedly shaking his head. 

“You know that’s only going to cause a lot more problems if I do.” 

“Then maybe we can come back during the night.” His eyes light up and you smile, “No one will be able to see you then, right?” 

He nods with a grin, “Okay.” 

You stay for a moment until Eunha calls out for you, sending a small bye in Taehyung’s direction. He tells you to have fun on his behalf and you happily oblige, racing over to your friends. Hoseok ends up bringing out a beach ball he stored in his car, tossing it over in your direction. 

You grasp onto it, raising it up high before launching it Sunyi’s way. She passes over to Eunha who then hands it over to Jungkook, before throwing it to Hoseok. 

Unfortunately, he barely hits it and it lands far behind him. 

“I’ll get it!” You instantly volunteer, hurriedly splashing against the water. In the midst of retrieving it, you notice Taehyung gazing in your direction and wave back at him, a soft smile on your lips. 

That’s when the throbbing begins. 

It starts off as a small pulse, but a sudden sharp ache shoots up your right leg and it completely stiffens. You gasp as the feeling intensifies, akin to someone wrapping their hands around your leg and twisting it as harshly as they can. 

Your hands slip off from Hoseok’s beach ball and before you even know it, you’re sinking straight down into the pit of the ocean. 

Water fills your lungs at an alarming amount and you attempt to kick away at the water, but it only results in a cascade of agonizing pain to run through your leg. You feel yourself slipping away bit by bit, barely any sunlight reaching you as the ocean continues to swallow you whole. 

A hand grabs onto yours right away. 

You squint against the cold waters to see a blue tail swimming closer to you, a shade of bright sapphire emerging and hurriedly lifting you up. Once you meet sea level, you wheeze and gasp, coughing out all the water that luckily bubbles out of your system. 

Taehyung keeps an arm against your back as you do, but your eyes grow alarmingly wide once your vision clears up. 

“T-Taehyung?” You promptly question, eyes flickering over him in concern, “You’re in the water, if anyone sees-” 

“I don’t care if they see me.” He interjects, “Are you okay?” 

You nod and his shoulders sag in relief. 

“Thank god.” He breathes, hugging you close to him. You’re a bit taken aback from how he tightly grasps onto you, as if letting go was the last thing on his mind. 

“Taehyung….” You whisper, slightly breaking away to look up at him. You keep forgetting how alluring his appearance has become, his sea green eyes and sapphire hair never failing to captivate you every single time. 

He sadly smiles, fear-filled eyes boring into yours, “I didn’t want to lose you a second time.” 

Your vision unconsciously glosses over and before you know it, you’re looping your arms around his neck and roughly pressing your lips against his. He seems stunned by the sudden motion, but immediately reciprocates as you begin to move your lips. 

It’s not somber, like how it was saying goodbye for the last time. It’s neither bittersweet, like how it was dumping precious memories into a suitcase and leaving the place you once tenderly remarked was your home. It’s instead reciprocal, like how it felt when you first fell in love with him. 

You part from him and he flutters his eyes open, as if still trapped in a daze. But once you pass along a genuine gaze in his direction, his rambles begin. 

“I-I’m still in love with you. Ever since we broke up. I’d never thought I would get the chance to see you again but then you showed up on this trip and I-” You lean forward to kiss him again, catching him off guard for the second time. 

“You’re not the only one who’s still holding onto feelings.” You smile and he returns it, “I’m sorry for what happened between us, I think I just got too invested in trying to live together that I didn’t realize how big of a step that was and ended up rushing you without thinking.”

“I’m sorry too.” Taehyung professes, guilt weighing down deep in his green orbs, “I used to always hate when we fought so I never took it seriously, but I didn’t realize how much that hurt you in the process. I should have just been honest with you and told you I wasn’t ready.” 

You share a mutual look with each other, something you don’t think you could have ever done when you were together. Taehyung hovers over your lips again and you flutter your eyes shut, but he freezes mid-way. 

“Taehyung?” You ponder, but his hand instantly reaches out from the water to cover your eyes. You catch a glimpse of blonde hair and suddenly you’re taken back to the night the two of you got caught up in a storm. 

“A-Are you-?” 

“Don’t.” 

His hand leaves your face, falling down to your shoulder. You slowly open your eyes, peeking out to see his sapphire hair and green eyes replaced with his familiar blonde shade and warm brown eyes. The corners of your lips curl in astonishment, but before you can say anything, Taehyung spins you around. 

His grip tightens on your shoulders, “The others will be here soon to find you, but don’t look down and get me some clothes asap.” 

Frowning at his instructions, your eyes suddenly light up and you’re swimming away, “Right!” 

As you leave, Taehyung sinks back into the water with an exasperated sigh. 

“Are you sure you’re okay?” Eunha asks, her hands resting against her hips. Sunyi sits on a chair next to her, munching down on a bag of chips in her lap that she had managed to steal from Hoseok. 

Pausing your packing for a minute, you swivel around with a sigh, “I’m okay Eunha, it was just a cramp. Taehyung managed to save me before I drowned so I’m alright now.”

“Oh yeah! You guys are together now, right?” Sunyi exclaims, resulting in a small smile to stretch on your lips. Eunha’s eyes widen and she places a hand on your shoulder. 

“Really? Are you serious?” 

You nod, “We made up during our time here. I guess this vacation was all we needed to resolve our old problems.” 

“Oh my gosh, this is amazing!” Sunyi smooshes the two of you into a hug, “I think this is the first time all of us will be in a relationship!” 

Your brows furrow and you drop the shirt you were folding, “All of us?”

Your gaze automatically meets Eunha and she suddenly grows bashful, pushing back a lock of her hair, “Ah, well you see....” 

“You and Jungkook finally got together?” A smirk crosses your lips and Eunha’s mouth falls agape, gaze falling to the ground. 

“W-Was it that obvious?” 

“Huh?” Eunha looks up to see Sunyi counting and passing you a couple of coins like it was the most normalest thing ever. 

“What? Seriously?!” A scoff leaves her lips, “You guys betted on whether me and Jungkook were going to be together?!?” 

“Hey, it was a fair deal.” You point out, grinning at Sunyi, “Which I definitely won.” 

Sunyi rolls her eyes, counting out the rest of your coins. A low knock draws you out of your thoughts, raising your head to see Taehyung leaning against the doorframe with a smug smile on his face. 

“All packed?” He asks and you nod, planting your suitcase onto the ground before scurrying over to him. 

“Just need to dry out our towels and find Hoseok’s shoes, but otherwise yeah.” 

“If that’s the case then….” He peers into your room, reaching out his hand for you, “Do you guys mind if I steal her for a while?” 

“By all means.” Sunyi says, both her and Eunha sending you sly smiles. You pout in response, but let Taehyung lead you away. 

He brings you outside near the shore, now easily able to walk along the grey sand with his bare feet. However, that doesn’t seem like the destination he has in mind as he brings you closer to the edge, near a rocky shore you recall snoozing for hours along. 

“You want to go back?” You ask in surprise, letting him reach out for you once he jumps down from a high leveled rock. He catches you as you jump, humming. 

“Even though we went there in the middle of the night, I want to go back one last time.” He pauses, turning around and smirking at you, “You know, without a tail and all.” 

You giggle, “But I thought it suited you.” 

Taehyung raises a brow, appearing offended, “Really? Last I recall, I was being called a fish left and right.” 

“You didn’t have eyelids.” You protest, but then Taehyung draws uncomfortably close to your head and blinks rapidly. 

“What are these then, huh?” He very obviously points to his now present lids and you laugh, pushing him off from you. 

“Okay, okay! You have eyelids now!” You clap your hands together, “What a miracle!” 

He shakes his head with a smile, carefully leading you to the spot he found that night. You peer around, noticing how the sunlight forecasted onto the shore in a way that brightened it even more compared to the moon. 

“It’s breathtaking.” You whisper, swiveling to look at where the shore meets the ocean. 

“It is.” Taehyung remarks, “I think I’m going to truly miss being part fish.” 

You lean closer to him, “Well, if you’re really going to miss it that much...I could toss you into the ocean right now and pray for a storm to take you away.” 

Taehyung places a hand on his chest, pretending to be teary-eyed, “You would really do that for me?” 

You snort, “Of course.”

Kneeling down, you dip your hands into the icy waters for one last time. Taehyung joins you, playing around harmlessly and then somehow accidentally splashing you with some of it. 

You scoff as he laughs, but you soon get your revenge in the midst of his laughter, to which he mumbles that he probably deserved that. You chuckle and he smiles, shaking the water droplets out of his hands before helping you up as well. 

“We should get going.” You remind him, “The others are probably waiting for us.” 

Taehyung hums, but it’s not long before he freezes and his content expression completely falters. 

A shaky hand is placed on your arm, drawing out your oblivious attention. 

Taehyung points to the ocean, where a pair of two green eyes are staring back at the two of you. 

Your eyes widen and you stagger back, nearly bumping into him if he hadn’t immediately caught you. The green eyes catch the movement, drawing closer to you. From afar, the long strands of sapphire hair flowing in the water and the blue tail shimmering within the ocean gives you a slight glimpse of exactly what you’re dealing with, but it seems like an afterthought once both you and Taehyung scream in unison. 

“That’s it! I’ve had enough of this place!” Taehyung shouts, racing away to get back to the steep rocks that lead back to the cabin. The green eyes continue to watch as you scurry after him immediately.

“Don’t leave me behind!!” You plead, following after him as quickly as you can. Along the way you managed to slip on a slippery rock, resulting in Taehyung lifting you onto his back so you can get away faster together. 

From a distance away, the girl with the green eyes submerged in the ocean chuckles. 

[madpanda75]

“Taking Chances Part 9: Love, Tequila, and Ice Cream”

And we’re back!!!!! So to give you a brief recap, Rafael and the reader left the Carisi house in a huff after the reader gave Sonny “the slap heard around the world.” Find out what happens next in this latest chapter. Words are said, sexy times happen. It’s fluffy, smutty fun....for now 😉💕

NSFW: Sex by the fireplace! Can ya’ dig it??? 😜💥🔥

Rafael adjusted his grip on the steering wheel as he drove across the Verrazano Bridge. Occasionally he would glance over at you sitting in the passenger seat with your head down and your hands gently folded in your lap. 

Rafael cleared his throat. “So should we go to my place or yours?”

You grunted out a monotone syllable in response.

“Ok, your place it is,” he said with a sigh, turning on the blinker and making a right turn towards your apartment.

Once back at your place, you immediately went to the living room and started a fire. Your apartment may have been a shoebox, but the wood burning fireplace was a definite perk. When you first moved in, the notion of a struggling artist pouring her heart and soul onto the canvas beside a roaring fire seemed romantic and bohemian. 

While you stroked the flames to life, Rafael stood there with his hands in his pockets, rocking back and forth on his heels. “Cold night, huh?” He inwardly cringed at having been reduced to commenting on the weather.

“Mmhmm,” you replied.

“Two syllables. That’s progress,” he thought. Maybe by the end of the night, you would utter an actual word. After several minutes of deafening silence, he made yet another feeble attempt at conversation. “Your mom is a wonderful cook.”

“Hmmm,” you grunted.

“That’s it. I can’t take it anymore.” Rafael crouched down next to you and took your face in his hands, forcing you to meet his gaze. Your eyes were still shiny with tears, your nose bright red. 

It was the first time since leaving your parents’ house that you had looked at him or even acknowledged his presence apart from the occasional mumble. “I know this afternoon was a complete disaster, but I can’t take this anymore. Please say something. Anything.”

Your bottom lip quivered before blurting out, “He cheated on me!” As soon as the words escaped your lips, you crumbled into a heap on the floor, sobbing. 

Rafael gathered you into his arms, running his hands through your hair, rocking back and forth. You clung to him, wetting his brand new Tom Ford dress shirt. But neither of you could care less. After all, he knew what it was like to be betrayed.  Once you calmed down, he asked, “So tequila or ice cream?” 

“Both,” you replied with a hiccup and a very loud unladylike sniffle.

Rafael got up and walked over to your kitchen to grab the bottle of Tequila Ocho Reposado you had hidden in your cupboard behind the cheap stuff before rummaging in your freezer for the pint of Haagen-Dazs’ Chocolate Chocolate Chip. He smiled when he saw the post-it note you had left on the frozen dessert.

“This ice cream is the personal property of Y/N Carisi. DO NOT TOUCH OR PREPARE TO MEET A VIOLENT SUDDEN DEATH!” 

He handed you a spoon and a glass. “Why do you have a death threat on your ice cream?” 

“Sometimes Teresa or Gina crash here after partying or a bad date. They’re notorious for stealing my secret stash of junk food.” You pulled the cork out of the tequila bottle with your teeth and drank straight from the bottle. 

Several smooth swigs of alcohol and an unfortunate brain freeze later, you and Rafael sat in front of the fire and swapped war stories. Although he had briefly mentioned being cheated on by his childhood ex-girlfriend, Yelina; tonight he shared more with you than he ever had with anyone. How heartbroken he was. The humiliation. How after such a betrayal he wondered if he ever could trust someone ever again. 

Likewise, you felt safe enough to stop skirting around the ex situation and finally tell the truth about Theo. “We were supposed to go to some bakery in Staten Island to sample cakes for our wedding, but Theo told me he wasn’t feeling well and asked if we could reschedule. I didn’t think anything of it at the time.” You snorted a laugh as you scraped the last bit of ice cream out of the container. “How stupid was I?”

“Hey, don’t talk about my girlfriend that way.” Rafael wiped away a spot of chocolate chocolate chip ice cream on the corner of your mouth with his thumb. 

“Later on that day, I came home with some ribollita and tea.”

“Ribollita?” 

“It’s an Italian bread and vegetable soup. My mom would make it for us whenever we’re sick or sad,” you explained. 

“When I walked inside, I saw a trail of clothes and heard a girl’s giggle coming from down the hall. I followed the sound, opened the bedroom door, and saw him with Lacey. The 21 year old bimbo who worked at the dry cleaners down the street,” you said in such a bitter tone that Rafael could feel the acerbic bite in his bones. Hell hath no fury than a woman scorned.

 “It had been going on for months. Apparently, she had been doing way more than spot treatments and pressing his pants. I dumped the soup on his 500 thread count Egyptian cotton sheets, threw the ring at his forehead, and left. He never followed me. He never fought for us.” You shook your head and took another shot of tequila when your phone began to buzz and dance across the floor. It was your brother. Since leaving your parents’ house he had called ten times-- a new record for him.

Rafael watched as you shut off your phone and tossed it over to the couch. While Sonny was not his favorite person by any means, he knew how important your brother was to you. The last thing he wanted out of this relationship was to come between you and your family. Not only did he firmly believe they would despise him for it, but above all else he had a gnawing fear that you would resent him for driving that wedge. “You know, you’re going to have to talk to him eventually.”

You scoffed, “I never want to speak to Sonny again. I hate him.”

“That’s not true and you know it.”

You rolled your eyes. As usual Rafael was right, but that didn’t mean you had to give in and be the first person to offer an olive branch. Sonny was a colossal jerk and he needed to learn a lesson. 

“He’s just looking out for you,” Rafael continued. “In his own sick and twisted way.”

You arched a brow at your boyfriend. “So how much did you overhear when Sonny and I were in the kitchen?”

Rafael shrugged and averted his gaze, suddenly incredibly fascinated with the  pattern on your rug. “Not much. Snippets really.”

“So pretty much all of it?”

“Pretty much,” he confirmed. “Did...did you ever love him?” 

There was a pregnant pause before you responded. Rafael stared into the fire, watching the flames dance and flicker, unable to face you. Of course he already knew the answer was yes. You were a hopeless romantic. But the idea of you loving another man, planning a future with them, made his stomach knot up.

 “I thought I did once. But it was different. I can see that now.”

Rafael nodded thoughtfully and grabbed the ice cream carton and bottle of tequila to take back into the kitchen. “How so?” 

“Theo and I grew up together. We were childhood sweethearts. The only reason we got engaged is because that’s what people expected of us. It was the next step. But looking back, I realized I was complacent and complacency does not equal love.” 

You glanced over at a picture on the coffee table of you and Rafael. You had taken it one lazy Sunday morning in bed, Rafael was kissing your cheek, his bed head sticking out in all directions while you were laughing hysterically. What the picture didn’t capture was that he was tickling that one spot right under your ribcage. You smiled fondly at that happy moment frozen in time.  “Love should be scary. It’s taking chances. It’s thrilling. I never felt that with Theo. I feel all those things when I’m with you. I love you.”

Rafael walked back into the living room, completely stunned by your declaration. “What did you say?”

“I love you?” you said with a shrug, feeling a wave of nerves. Perhaps you had jumped the gun.

Rafael plopped down on the rug beside you. He had realized early on in the relationship that he loved you, but always chalked it up to indigestion and brushed his feelings aside. He never believed you would reciprocate so soon. “Are you sure?” He turned towards you and cupped your face. “This isn’t just the tequila and ice cream talking. You’re not drunk or on a raging sugar high?”

You giggled and mimicked his movements, cupping his cheeks. “I promise I am not under any influence of any kind. I love you, Rafael Barba. With every fiber of my being, I love you.” 

A tear slipped down your cheek which he brushed away. “I love you too.” He leaned forward and captured your lips with a kiss. Parting your mouth with his tongue, his touch was gentle yet commanding. Your toes were beginning to curl.

A heat crept up your body and you started to undo the top few buttons of your dress. Out of the corner of his eye, Rafael spied a flash of emerald green against your skin and stopped his ministrations.

“What’s the matter?” you asked out of breath.

He ignored your question and tugged your dress aside a little more, revealing the silk emerald green corset. The corset that you had taunted him with when you invited him to lunch on Sunday. The corset that he had envisioned ripping to shreds with his teeth.

You giggled and blushed, tucking a loose strand of hair behind your ear. “With all the drama, I forgot I had this on.”

“You mean...you wore this to church?” 

You slowly nodded your head. “And to my parents’ house.”

Rafael was already rock hard, but now he was on the brink of coming in his pants at the mere thought of you wearing this sinful lingerie underneath your demure dress all day-- piously praying at St. Thomas; helping your mother with her marinara sauce in the kitchen. “Stand up so I can see you better,” he gruffly commanded.

You obeyed and slowly went back to the task of removing your dress. “Stop,” he said and replaced your hands with his. “Let me.”

Your heart was hammering in your chest at his request. A tiny whimper escaped your throat as he peeled your dress off. Rafael’s hands were trembling with each button. It wasn’t as if he hadn’t seen you naked before, but this time felt different. He was nervous. Locking eyes with you, he could see you were nervous too.

Once your clothes were shed, he drank you in from head to toe--from how that particular shade of green complimented your skin, to your hard nipples poking through the silk and lace, all the way down to the black thigh high stockings connected to your garters. “Eres perfecta,” he whispered, his eyes half-hooded with lust as he began to take off his clothes.

You grabbed his hands, effectively stopping him. “Allow me.” You arched your brow and began shedding layer after layer. You took your time, running your hands over his exposed flesh, feeling his firm muscles beneath your palms. 

Completely lost in the sensation of your fingertips against his skin, the clanging of his belt against the floor brought Rafael back to reality. His boxer briefs were the last to go. With a flirty snap of the elastic, you rid him of his underwear, his hardened cock springing free. He toed out of his socks and stepped towards you, nudging his clothes out of the way.

You stared at each other for a long moment-- your chests heaving, bodies pulsating. The tension between you both was electric. Not wanting to wait another second, you pressed yourself against Rafael, kissing him hard, nibbling on his bottom lip. He returned the kiss with vigor. You could feel his throbbing erection weeping onto your inner thigh, brushing against your lace-covered pussy.

In awe of this beautiful man in your arms, you began to work your way down his body, laying wet wanton kisses across his skin. “Oh Y/N, please,” he whimpered. Hearing him beg, you raked your teeth against his nipple, a particular sensitive spot for Rafael. He gasped in response. 

You smirked, reveling in the fact that you had reduced him to a begging, quivering mess. Kneeling before him, you took his cock in your hand and teasingly flicked your tongue against his slit.  

Rafael groaned at the sight of you looking up at him with big innocent eyes and a wide welcoming mouth. From this angle, he could see the way your garters rested on the luscious curve of your ass. 

You wrapped your lips around him, swirling around his crown as if you were sucking a lollipop, tracing every vein. 

Rafael threw his head back and groaned, “Ay Dios mío.”

His cock felt hot and heavy in your mouth, you relaxed your throat as you slowly swallowed him down, pushing his head past your tight ring of muscle. Your nose was tickled by his trimmed pubic hair. He held your head there for a moment, relishing in the sensation.

You smacked his ass and grabbed a handful of his flesh before pulling off him with a pop. “Fuck my mouth, mi amor,” you purred while stroking his length. “Don’t hold back. I want all of it.”

He wrapped his hand around your long locks and fed you his cock. “You naughty little girl,” he growled before thrusting. “Going to put that mouth of yours to good use.”

“Mmmhmm,” you moaned. Tears were running down your cheeks as you gagged around him, taking everything he had to give. You loved when Rafael got rough. You craved it. Giving him pleasure brought you pleasure.

One of your hands reached up to massage his balls while the other reached in between his legs, pressing down on that strip of skin between his cock and his ass. That was all it took for Rafael to come undone. His cock swelled and released. His warm seed splashing against your tongue. Rafael came so hard, he was practically bent in half, clutching the mantle, grunting over and over again. You sucked him dry, not stopping until he gently pulled you off his sensitive cock.

“Jesus Christ,” he chuckled. “You have a mouth like a vacuum cleaner.”

“Should I take that as a compliment?” you asked, wiping away some of your smudged lipstick.

“I nearly had a heart attack just now, what do you think?” He had an evil glint in his eye and took several steps towards causing you to scoot back. “I think I need to repay the favor. Don’t you?”

“Only if you insist.” You laid back down on the floor in your most seductive pose.

Rafael knelt down. “Oh believe me”-- he grabbed your legs and pulled you towards him causing you to squeal in surprise--“I insist.”

He ran his hands across your body, pressing against your form through the silk. Wanting to repay you for your earlier torment, Rafael took his time disrobing you--tugging at the laces of your corset, unsnapping your garters, peeling your stockings off. There wasn’t an inch of skin left unattended from the crown of your head down to the arches of your feet. 

You couldn’t catch your breath. “Payback is a bitch,” you thought as he sucked a mark onto your right hip. Rafael saved your thong for last, opting to tear it off you with his teeth. 

He parted your folds, revealing your glistening pink pearl, stroking your soft, wet, sex. You spread your legs wider, feeling his hot breath on your pussy, arching your hips toward him. He clucked in disapproval. “So impatient.” 

“Please,” you whimpered. “I need you.”

Unable to resist any longer (after all, he was only human), he began to worship your core. Offering his tongue as a prayer as he swirled around your lower lips and traced patterns on your clit.  

You grinded against him. “More,” you pleaded.

With a loud squelch, Rafael stopped and lifted his head. “You have such a perfect little pussy. I love it so much”--he playfully bit down on your inner thighs-- “and it’s all mine. Isn’t it?” With an intense, heated stare, he spit on your pussy. The sensation of his saliva on your swollen clit caused you to jump.

“Yes, it’s yours,” you wailed.

“That’s right,” he cooed while slowly making concentric circles on your bundle of nerves, watching how his spit mingled with your dripping juices. “And you’re gonna come all over my face, aren’t you?”

You arched your back and gasped. “Oh God, yes! Yes!

“Shhh, that’s my good girl,” he said with a smirk before devouring you once more. Your moans of “More” and “Don’t stop” spurred him on. 

With his mouth wrapped around your clit, he penetrated you with his fingers, stroking that spot deep within you that drove you insane. One crook of his finger had you coming with a shriek. 

Feeling your core pulse against his tongue as he fucked you through your orgasm unleashed something savage within him. He buried his face against you, groaning, his lips and chin completely coated in your arousal. Already hard from eating you out, he rutted against the rug, desperate for some relief.

His tongue was relentless while he fucked you with his fingers until he ripped another orgasm from you. By the third time you had come, you melted onto the floor. And yet you wanted more. With Rafael, it was never enough. 

You pushed him off you and straddled him, kissing him with such fierce passion he toppled back to the floor. “I want to show you how much I love your cock.” You nuzzled your nose with his before sitting up and dragging your center against his length. Hovering over his cock for a moment, you lowered yourself onto him. 

Rafael grabbed your hips to keep you in place as he rotated his pelvis, wanting you to feel every inch of his cock. Your whole body shuddered. Digging your nails into his chest, you began to rock against him. 

Rafael groaned, watching you fuck him. “Look down, querida. Look at how fucking sexy you look riding me.”

You followed his gaze down to where you were being impaled by him. Biting back a whimper, you experimentally flexed your muscles, squeezing against his cock. Rafael choked out a sob which only encouraged you to speed up your movements.

You lifted almost completely off him before slamming back down. 

Flames licked at your flesh as you continued to bounce on his cock. Rivulets of sweat dripped off of you, one drop running down your chest. Rafael sat up and caught it with his tongue, holding you close as he latched on to your nipple, suckling against the hardened bud before repeating his actions on your other breast.

Your bodies worked in tandem, pushing and pulling. You were reduced to a wild animal, clawing at Rafael. Red streaks covered his sweaty skin. He loved it, wanting nothing more than to be claimed by you, his own ethereal goddess.

“Rafael!” you cried out in a hoarse voice. He cut you off with a searing kiss.

“I love you,” he moaned against your lips.

“I love you too.” Tears began to run down your cheeks. Your heart was beating fast, blood pounding in your ears, pressure mounting. You were too far gone by this point. Can you die from pleasure? Oh...but what a way to go. 

He pulled back, forcing you to lock eyes with him. His eyebrows furrowed, mouth slack, panting and whimpering with every thrust. You pressed your forehead against his, your breaths mingling. This was beyond the physical. Your souls were melding, transforming one another. 

You simultaneously erupted, swallowing each other’s moans and grunts, stroking each other through your respective releases. When you finally floated back down to earth, you collapsed on the floor, your bodies still connected. 

“Holy shit,” you sighed.

“I know,” Rafael panted.

“If I knew saying ‘I love you’ would lead to mind blowing sex, I would’ve said it a whole lot earlier,” you teased. 

“I knew you were only after me for my body.” Rafael let out a breathless laugh and tickled that one spot on your side. Exhausted and not in any hurry to move, you both laid there as the fire weakened until only a few dull embers glowed.

You nestled against his chest, having never felt so happy. As cheesy and cliché as it sounded, you wish you could stay that way forever. That is until the events from earlier in the day came floating back into your mind. You had no idea what you were going to do with your family, especially Sonny. 

But that wasn’t a question for tonight. Right now you were perfectly content being wrapped up in your own little world. Just you and Rafael.

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