thinking wat will b of this blog once i get tired of blue
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I wonder what life would be like
a bit more energy
a life without fatigue
where i can get more done
be satisfied with what you have begun
wonder what feel like wthout pain
a healthy body
a healthy brain
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okay, textures are actually done now :3c
rigging time...
ooh boy lol
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I 100% agree about Draco being gay. He IS gay. Its not even that I feel negative if he isnt gay, its just a truth, a fact to me LOL Funnily enough I feel the oppposite with Harry, as in he can be various sexualities depending on the story, he is bi in an 8th year fic, hes gay in his late 30s divorced w/ three kids etc
"hes gay in his late 30s divorced w/ three kids etc"
Anon, do not give me ideas and notions, I have way too many fics to write this year.
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Okay so...firstly I've seen too many ads for this game where none of them make real sense. Now it has followed me, like the immortal snail, to tumblr and precedes to use a classic pose to try and convince me to play when I KNOW that I will not see the classic titanic pose in my harem building game....cruelty
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Today my therapist introduced me to a concept surrounding disability that she called "hLep".
Which is when you - in this case, you are a disabled person - ask someone for help ("I can't drink almond milk so can you get me some whole milk?", or "Please call Donna and ask her to pick up the car for me."), and they say yes, and then they do something that is not what you asked for but is what they think you should have asked for ("I know you said you wanted whole, but I got you skim milk because it's better for you!", "I didn't want to ruin Donna's day by asking her that, so I spent your money on an expensive towing service!") And then if you get annoyed at them for ignoring what you actually asked for - and often it has already happened repeatedly - they get angry because they "were just helping you! You should be grateful!!"
And my therapist pointed out that this is not "help", it's "hLep".
Sure, it looks like help; it kind of sounds like help too; and if it was adjusted just a little bit, it could be help. But it's not help. It's hLep.
At its best, it is patronizing and makes a person feel unvalued and un-listened-to. Always, it reinforces the false idea that disabled people can't be trusted with our own care. And at its worst, it results in disabled people losing our freedom and control over our lives, and also being unable to actually access what we need to survive.
So please, when a disabled person asks you for help on something, don't be a hLeper, be a helper! In other words: they know better than you what they need, and the best way you can honor the trust they've put in you is to believe that!
Also, I want to be very clear that the "getting angry at a disabled person's attempts to point out harmful behavior" part of this makes the whole thing WAY worse. Like it'd be one thing if my roommate bought me some passive-aggressive skim milk, but then they heard what I had to say, and they apologized and did better in the future - our relationship could bounce back from that. But it is very much another thing to have a crying shouting match with someone who is furious at you for saying something they did was ableist. Like, Christ, Jessica, remind me to never ask for your support ever again! You make me feel like if I asked you to call 911, you'd order a pizza because you know I'll feel better once I eat something!!
Edit: crediting my therapist by name with her permission - this term was coined by Nahime Aguirre Mtanous!
Edit again: I made an optional follow-up to this post after seeing the responses. Might help somebody. CW for me frankly talking about how dangerous hLep really is.
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The real problem with following the DW tag is that a lot of people think David tennant is hot and. I disagree.
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he pulled up to save sakura but yes i am not ready how hot he is ♡⃛ദ്ദി ˉ͈̀꒳ˉ͈́ )✧
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