#but i fear she'll never believe it the same way she doesn't fucking believe ME

[sherlock-is-ace]

.

[mrswolffs-blog]

AUDACITY: Toto Wolff x Wife!Black!Reader

TW: CURSING, YELLING

The hectic race here in Monza had finally come to an end and it is now time for the post-race interviews. One by one, the drivers were asked questions about what happened during their drive and what they think could've been done differently; however, a specific question a young driver had pissed off the wife the Mercedes AMG Petronas F1 Team, Y/n Wolff as she march her way in front of the man, blocking the journalist's sight of him.

"Could you please repeat that question you asked?" Y/n asked to make sure she heard the man right. "I asked if he felt that since he hadn't been winning any races for Christian, if he thought that maybe his time here in Formula 1 is running out?" the man asked once again, this time with a bit of fear for what the shorter yet feisty woman had to say. "So, I wasn't hallucinating, I heard you correctly! Now let me educate you on something here since you seem to lack the knowledge! A driver's career doesn't just end because they've been constantly not making it to the podium, sure he hasn't been winning yet he did a damn good job at keeping himself in the top six and THAT should be praised considering the state of favouritism going on in his team. Next is to address the fact that yes, we all know that Christian Horner is an impatient man when it comes to certain things, however he would never be that foolish to let Sergio go and if he was, he would pay for it dearly at my hands as I would personally burn his headquarters and garages to ashes, not leaving a pinch of paper for him to start over from. Mark my words, as whatever it is that you call yourself, the post-race interviews are for questions about the race and shouldn't go to the extent of you putting doubts into any driver's mind. BE WARNED THAT THIS IS YOUR FIRST AND LAST WARNING AS YOU ARE WALKING ON THIN ICE SEEMING THAT I COULD'VE HAD YOUR CAREER ENDED ON THE SPOT. Now apologize!" She shouted in anger that someone who should've been able to be trusted to ask sensible questions was actually a complete idiot out for nothing but starting chaos.

"I'm very sorry Sergio, I didn't think my words would have been taken that seriously" said the man as he was on the verge of tears, out of fear that he almost lost his job due to a foolish question. "It's ok, no hard feelings. Just try not to make this mistake again or best believe she'll be back for you" Sergio said as he went over to hug the man, being in shock himself.

Toto had been doing an interview with his drivers, when George noticed what was about to happen and tapped Lewis on the shoulder. They both called for Toto's attention, where the trio along with their journalist, watched on as Y/n gave the visibly shaking man a piece of her mind. After that was done, the lady interviewing them decided to ask "So Toto, you've obviously seen what your wife had just done. What would your reaction be to her for this?" the journalist smiled as she awaited an answer from Toto who as himself looks genuinely scared. "My question is What the fuck do you all want me to do?! I'm not getting involve in that! The last time you all had me interfere, I was unable to sleep on my pillows for a month!" He replied in a panicked tone as Lewis and George were the only two who knew what his "pillows" meant. "Dude, you've got to be kidding me. You still call her breasts pillows? How comfortable could they be?" George asked in amusement that his boss was still obsessed with his wife's boobs. "Trust me Russ, they are very comfy, I've also added and new pair. The ass" Toto said making everyone, including the journalist laugh. "Alright, so I see you're unable to help the guy out, that's all the questions I have for you three. Have a nice rest of your day" the woman said as they replied, "Same to you."

Unbeknownst to them the cameras had still been filming LIVE and they manged to capture the response which sent the world into a spiral at the fact that such a giant of man's weakness was being able to sleep on his wife as it now became the biggest thing to tease him of whenever he did something he wasn't supposed to.

[tinned-beef]

Allison Hargreeves is being unfairly vilified?

Allison Hargreeves as in 'SA'd Luther' Allison Hargreeves? Allison Hargreeves as in 'confirmed Viktor's worst ongoing fears and anxieties just because Viktor was grieving his friend/stepson and it annoyed her' Allison Hargreeves? Allison Hargreeves 'contributed to the deaths of two of her siblings' Allison Hargreeves? Allison Hargreeves 'nothing anyone else has lost over the course of this nightmare matters as much as what I lost so I'm gonna fuck everything up potentially irreparably' Allison Hargreeves?

That Allison Hargreeves? I mean don't get me wrong I like her but she's very much a villain right now. She's an interesting villain, a compelling villain, a better villain than Reggie since we actually know wtf her problem is and we wish things hadn't turned out this way. But a villain all the same.

i don't think allison is a villain. at best, i'd say she's an antihero. at worst, she was a catalyst for viktor's arc in season three.

i would like to start by saying that i'm not defending allison's actions. i think what she did was wrong. however, i don't think she deserves all the hate that she's gotten. she's a character that is very morally gray, and people continue to paint her in solely black or white.

what i try to convey in this... very long post is that there's a reason for what allison does in season three. the question of if she’s a villain or not can be debated, but i believe that the reasons for her actions don’t make her a villain.

a big reason why the umbrella academy is such an incredible show is that all the umbrellas are flawed and nuanced, and despite it all they love. all of the umbrellas have their faults, and allison is no different.

in season three allison has lost all hope. she thinks she will never see her child again, her husband is dead, the world is ending, and to her it seems like her siblings don't give a shit. amidst all the chaos and the whirlwind of her life, she needs something that she's used to. something she knows how to navigate.

so she turns to luther. and she gets the comfort she's looking for but it's not right.

allison and luther's relationship is something that has been a topic of many debates in this fandom. i don't really want to get into it right now, but they've always been a person of comfort to each other. allison wants to feel loved and cared for, and she thinks she can get that comfort from luther.

allison is naturally selfish. she's used to getting what she wants. she's used to having the world at her fingertips. and yet almost everything she's held close to her heart has been ripped away from her. and she's never getting it back.

in season three she falls back onto her old habits, rumoring people left and right with no consideration for others. it makes sense because it's the only way she knows how to get what she wants.

and then she rumors luther. she doesn't want to lose him either, and she thinks that he's choosing sloane over her (which is true, but she thinks he's leaving forever. she thinks she'll lose him too). but she almost instantly realizes what she's done, almost instantly tries to take it away.

as for her relationship with viktor, that's another can of worms. in season one, allison is the only one really trying to mend that relationship with viktor. but it's a rocky road. allison snaps at viktor, viktor snaps at allison. these two have had tension from the very start. eventually, that bond had to snap.

at the start of season three, viktor is the only one that really tries to help allison. he stands up for her, and comforts her after she returns from la. but by episode three allison is so consumed by her grief that she's already clashing with viktor.

and when harlan makes an appearance, it just gets worse. harlan is like a son to viktor. someone viktor can care for. and when viktor turns that care and attention away from allison and instead towards harlan, it hurts. why is viktor allowed to have his child when allison will never get to see claire again?

in season three luther tells viktor that allison has “always been good to you (viktor)”. but there comes a point where your love and gratitude towards someone can morph into bitterness and hate.

the reason i say allison is a catalyst for viktor in season three is because the writers needed someone to contest his ideas. someone that will create a struggle for viktor that he will ultimately come out of with a new lesson learned. and allison is a great contender for that position. the show needs conflict in order to have an engaging story at all, and tense relationships between the siblings can be seen throughout all three seasons. (luther and diego in season one, ben and klaus in season two)

as for the deaths of her siblings, do you really think she wanted that to happen? she doesn’t want to lose any more people, that’s the main driver of her character shift in this season.

allison turns towards reginald because she sees it as the only option left. klaus does the same thing, so why is it any different when allison does it? she didn’t know her siblings would die in the process.

allison isn’t even the only sibling that has contributed to a sibling’s (almost) death. viktor slashes her throat in season one, ben sacrifices himself to save the world, and luther willingly walks into the room to talk to reginald. how is that allison’s fault?

i think this is also why five gives his talk to viktor, not allison. he understands what allison is going through on some level, understands the despair of losing those who are close to you. understands being willing to do anything to get them back. even though he quite loudly disagrees with allison making a deal with reginald, it's because he knows she's getting tricked. reginald never had their best interests at heart.

they’ve all lost people, and they all react to that loss in different ways. in season 1, when diego finds that patch was killed, he instantly wants to go for revenge. he plans on going after hazel and cha cha but five inevitably talks him out of it.

allison doesn’t have that influence. in fact, diego suggests to instead let that grief out through anger. i don’t think it was a very good solution in the end.

and despite all that, she wants to redeem herself. she tries to tell viktor the truth, she admits that she made the plan for all of them. she kills reginald and she’s the one that pushes the button at the end of season three. there’s so much left that we don’t know. did allison know what would happen when she pressed the button? did she know what reginald’s real plan was?

but in the end, allison is the reality of a person who has lost those who are closest to her. it’s probably the best job the writers have done while showing trauma and grief. i don’t think allison is a villain, and i think that accusing her of solely caring about herself is unfair.

[seahydra]

🐍 cybergoth summary post 🦇

I'm not kidding when I say this is long. This is all just early relationship backstory for the most part. Sorry for any cringe. I love you.

LAZARUS, strange thing that she is, is abruptly sent to Hell one morning. Not dead yet; it was because she had apparently "applied" to be part of an "exchange program" at an academy full of demons. She does not recall ever applying to this in the first place, and certainly doesn't want to go back to school again, but she figures it's best not to object for now.

He has the details explained to him a bit less in-detail than he would like and is sent to the house where he'll be living in for the rest of the year until the program is over. He has. Six roommates. He's so fucking mad.

While the demon assigned to be her "guardian" (Mammon) is in the middle of talking about something she's not really paying attention to, they're both interrupted by another person entering the room, clearly already pissed off. This is Leviathan. Seeing Lazarus seems to give him an idea 💡 (bad) - and he promptly drags her off to his room.

Now, in her room... Lazarus is absolutely fascinated by it. It's aquatic. There's a bathtub full of blankets in there- her bed? She has a computer with 4 monitors. There is so much anime merch and some of it is of series that he recognizes and loves dearly.

Levi's room makes her feel a little bit hopeful. She'd been worried about not being able to adjust to a new place, about being friendless and needing to hide her interests, as usual... but there was a fellow nerd right here! Perhaps she could at least connect with one person?

So he thinks, anyway. But when he mentions also being into the same things Levi is, she immediately shuts that down.

"Yeah, right. Don't try and relate to me, you liar. I know how you normies work- you want to try and act like you're best friends with the weird outcast so you can use everything I tell you against me later!"

And, well, it's not like Lazarus doesn't understand that fear. That's literally happened to her. But the sting of rejection and the anger at an implication that she's some kind of poser causes her to storm out of his room without another word. Levi never gets to tell her what his plan for her was.*

The relationship between those two was strained for weeks afterwards. Whenever one would enter a room, the other would get up and leave. Only interacting with each other if they were somehow required to. Clearly, they don't care for each other very much.

...Even so, Lazarus feels a strange pull whenever he thinks about Levi. Despite his disdain for her and her gatekeeping, he still feels some desire to try and at least understand her a little more. He's not sure why. Maybe it's just because he stubbornly doesn't want to give up on his initial hope of being friends with her... but regardless.

She remembers a bunch of books on Levi's shelf that'd caught her eye the first (and last) time she'd been in his room. Some 138-volume fantasy series: The Tale of the Seven Lords (further referred to as TSL because I'm Not Typing All That). Being no stranger to long fantasy stories with convoluted lore, she decides to get into it.

It's a good series. He likes it a lot. Like, a lot. Seriously. She finishes reading the entire series (+ watches the movies, the animated series, even the god-awful theatrical version) in near record time. It's when he's rereading one of the novels in the living room that Levi catches him and is, well, kind of mad about it.

"Is that-? No way, you CAN'T be... you have to be trying to suck up to me or something, right? Or maybe you're doing this to spite me.. yeah, that sounds more like you. You're probably not even actually READING it-"

"This is my second read through the series."

"Liar."

Lazarus is irritated that he still refuses to believe her, but this interaction was also the most he's spoken to her since their first meeting, so she'll take it. Actually, she wants to take it a bit further: since it seems like he takes anyone liking the same things he does as a personal threat, she figures she'll give him a real one.

So, she challenges him to a trivia contest.

It's a terribly irresponsible idea and he knows it. But, Lazarus hopes there's even the slightest chance that this could all result in loser girl recognizing him as a kindred spirit and them becoming something like friends. NOT like he cares about that anymore, though. It's just no good being on such tense terms with someone you live with. That's all!

Day of the trivia contest. I will be honest. As much as she loved TSL, Lazarus knows she doesn't even come CLOSE to having the same level of investment in it that Levi does. So, she had to pull... a few strings, by asking one of her fellow students for help. That is to say- the match is rigged it's fucking rigged she pulls out a super rare one-of-a-kind piece of merch that Levi doesn't have.

And he's PISSED about it.

"The idea that someone like YOU could be a bigger TSL fan than me, it's- No... no, I WILL NOT STAND FOR THIIIIS!"

The room dissolves into chaos. Several hours later, in the guest bedroom- his bedroom- Lazarus reflects back on everything. Leviathan had just tried to kill him. Shifted into her demon form and everything. It was terrifying.

But she was so... So cuuuuuuuute!

She KNOWS she shouldn't feel that way, but! Once she'd had time to recover from the initial shock of it all, she realizes that perhaps Levi was a lot more interesting than she'd originally thought. The passion! His super cool horns that kind of looked like antlers- no, coral maybe? Anyway, she's kind of left in awe. And then she gets a text message.

Leviathan asks him to meet her in the planetarium. Quickly hiding any evidence of the fact that he was just kicking his feet giggling, he makes his way over. Levi gives him a (very half-hearted, but at least she tried) apology for the incident, and Lazarus speaks without thinking.

"I was impressed by you. Back there, I mean. I'd like to get to know you a little better- why not be my friend?"

"What?! Did you say friends? You and me...?! A-A-Are you... Are you out of your mind?! You know I just tried to attack you, right?"

He knows.

"And if Lucifer hadn't intervened, you'd be dead right now. You realize that, right? I mean, that literally JUST happened."

Yeah, he knows.

"Also... be my friend? Seriously? What are we, on the playground or something? Are you 5?! Who actually walks up to someone and asks them that? Could you BE any lamer?!"

Come on man you had to critique the word choice too?? But Levi's very obviously flustered, which means maybe he doesn't hate the idea THAT much?

"So, is that a no?"

"Whaaaaa-?! Are you even listening to me? Of course it's a no! I... Hey, wait, don't just leave!!!"

Hesitantly, groaning and complaining about it every other sentence in an attempt to seem like the mere idea of making a friend physically pains her, Levi agrees to put their past gripes with each other aside.

"BUT! This doesn't mean we're, like, comrades, though! So don't go getting the wrong idea. It's not like I'm gonna start hanging out with you every day or anything."

So they actually do end up hanging out every day lol. Lmao even.

It takes a minute for Levi to warm up to her, as he's never really had a true friend before. Plus, well... His self-loathing makes it a difficult to believe that anyone could really like him.

But Lazarus is persistent. He's annoyingly persistent. Yet, it makes her so happy... she can't explain these weird feelings she starts to get about him, this desire to somehow be even closer to the one she already calls her best friend- without actually dating him, because that's not what she wants.

It's only when Lazarus off-handedly compares the two of them to a pair of characters in TSL one day that Levi finally starts to understand his actual feelings.

"Hey. Don't you think we're kind of a lot like Henry and the Lord of Shadow?"

"Huuuh?! I mean, I see the individual similarities, but do you mean... relationship-wise?"

"Mhm. You yourself are always going off about their intimate and unbreakable bond. That's kind of what we have, isn't it?"

"I guess so? Their relationship is sorta weird... Like, I wouldn't say they're in love exactly, but they're still kind of... ugh, I dunno. Their scenes just feel different. Something beyond."

"I get it. Henry is friends with all the other lords, too... but his friendships with them aren't anywhere close to the thing he has going on with the Lord of Shadow."

"Right! You get it! We're totally on the same page!"

Lazarus smiles a little.

"That we are. I'm happy to be friends with you, Levi."

* - It's because of this that Lazarus doesn't get to form a pact with Mammon. Actually she doesn't have pacts with anyone except for Levi (which she doesn't get immediately after the competition either. That comes some time later. When they trust each other more)

I have another OC (who's a relative of his. My special boy) that takes care of the pact-making. But Lazarus is still the one that gets into the attic yes.

Anyway it takes a bit of further soul searching, googling, and finding exactly one astonishingly well written QPR Henry/Lord of Shadow fanfic for Levi to learn the specific term for what she's experiencing but. There's that! I don't think they ever ask each other to be partners it just kind of naturally happens.

Also I have playlists.

🎵 [General ship playlist] + [Levi's POV] + [Laz's POV]

[love-toxin]

don't leave me be, be with me - yandere fruity four

plot: regardless of how much you love your partners, their love for you grows stifling now and again. and the best way to remedy that is to be a little rebellious, which is what leads you to sneak out with Robin and go for a little joyride and on a quest for breakfast in the middle of the night.

cws: gn!angelface, yandere fruity four, st 4 spoilers, polycule, post s4, eddie lives arc, PTSD-related coping mechanisms (alcohol abuse, isolation, reckless behavior), drinking, robin and angelface are drunk, drunk driving, scars, hurt/comfort, implied sexual dynamics, softcore, very mild jealousy, mentions of violence, fluff.

word count: 3.6k

spice level: 0.5/5

"Where the fuck are they?"

Steve's pacing again, shoes heavy on the carpet as he tries not to lose his temper. There's music blasting in Eddie's room, but the door is shut, and Nancy doesn't even want to try and knock right now. She doesn't have any answers for him, and it would just stress him out more. While it's been months since he's gotten out of the hospital, he's still healing in…other ways.

"I don't know, Steve."

"Yeah, well, they have to be somewhere, Nancy! They can't just disappear, not unless-"

"Steve, don't go there. They took the van, they're probably off getting ice cream or something–you know how those two are. The only danger they're in is Robin driving without a license." Nancy bites her lip. She doesn't know if that's the truth, she just wants it to be.

"Oh, God, what if they got into an accident?" But Steve's practically inconsolable–he always gets like this, his brain is hardwired to sense danger even when there is none. Probably. But there's a chance, so he's sniffed it out and won't stop fussing until he has you in his arms again, she's sure.

"Steve-" That look on his face is definitely not a good one, that sudden realization that means he can't stay still any longer–even though he hasn't been, it's shocking that there isn't an indent in the floor from where he's been pacing back and forth for the last hour. He marches over to the couch and grabs his jacket, throwing it on one arm at a time as he slides past Nancy and heads towards the front door. "Where in the world are you going?"

"Gonna drive around town and look for the van." Typical. His solutions are largely straight to the point, if not a little over the top. The second she opens her mouth for a rebuttal, he holds up a hand to stop her. "I'm going, Nance! Don't try to stop me."

She knows how stubborn he is, it's a good if not occasionally frustrating quality. And in all honesty, he has every right to be as fretful as he is.

All four of them nearly didn't survive the horrors that Vecna brought to Hawkins, but Steve and Eddie definitely experienced a new level of physical torment that she knows she won't ever fully be able to sympathize with. You're the only one Steve's ever really told the full story to, the one he's cried to and held so close for fear that if he didn't, you'd be taken away yourself. They've all seen each other's scars, but you've taken care of each and every one of them–you know them intimately, know the pain and the story and the way they've healed but never gone away, and never will. You're what Eddie calls their "cleric", but he always refers to you as an angel. And you are one.

Speaking of Eddie, he hasn't been the same either. None of them have, but he's different–quieter. The hospital seemed to numb him after the demobat attack, barely alive and clinging to life for so long that even Nancy didn't believe he would really make it. But you did, you never gave up on him, and eventually he opened his eyes and smiled that sweet smile at the sight of you, and she'll never forget the wails you let out as you hugged him so tight the nurse tried to pry you off–the memory usually brings a smile to her face. Steve got kicked out of the visiting room for a week after locking her out of the room, just so the four of you could hold Eddie as long as you wanted and kiss him, stroke his hair, tell him you love him…they were hard days, but good ones. But now everyone is just trying to survive normal life, and that's mostly to your credit. You make life just a little more bearable…and when you're gone, like you have been for the last couple hours, they're all on edge.

Nancy hurries after him out the door to the trailer, knowing good and well that she can't let him run off on a rescue mission by himself. He's too reckless with himself and too tunnel visioned when it comes to you, and it's certain not to turn out well if he really freaks out without someone there to calm him down. And that's when the familiar sound of crunching gravel hits her ears and she stops to watch the sight before her, Steve having only gotten to the bottom step before he freezes too.

That familiar van pulls up slowly, slow like the driver is trying not to draw attention, and comes to a stop just about a foot off of the mark that carves out the driveway from the rest of the grass. The pause between the vehicle stopping and the passengers getting out is suspiciously long, but when the doors crack open and the two of them get a glance at you, they're sure they know why.

"Naaaaaancy!" You giggle, your footsteps so wobbly as you move around the hood that you have to use it for support, while Robin hops out from the driver's seat and throws it closed before stumbling towards you. The two of you have to cling to each other, your hands clutching Robin's arm, to even hope to make it up the driveway and towards the front door–and when you get close enough, Nancy's nose crinkles as the smell of liquor wafts over and hits her like a train. So does the realization–you two have been drinking, and drinking hard.

"Can I have a kiss, Nancy?" You cackle, tripping over your own feet and nearly hitting the ground, if not for Robin's surge of strength as she pulls you back up with a goofy smirk on her lips. One glance at Steve, and she can see it clearly–he is absolutely pissed, his scowl mean enough to burn a hole through concrete.

"Where the hell were you two?!" He didn't mean to yell, Nancy knows that, but you two don't even flinch. You're not even all there, too caught up in your own world and in each other's mouths as you capture Robin in a kiss instead.

"Pancakes! Errrr, and other stuff.." You giggle around a mouthful of Robin's tongue, your playful wink just earning you a furious huff from your big, strong protector.

"Oh nooooooo, I think we're in trouble!" The two of you can't contain your laughter as you break off and nuzzle against each other, Robin's arm clutched in your soft hands as she whisper-yells that into your ear. She even cups her hand to make it seem like she's trying to be subtle, and she probably is, she just doesn't realize how loud she's being and how late it is.

"You're drunk." Steve states bluntly. It's not a first for Robin since the Vecna incident, unfortunately, but it's surprising for you.

"Just a liiiiiittle," Robin pouts, her fingers pinched together to show just how 'little' you and her have been drinking. From the smell of you two alone, it has to have been at least a full bottle of straight liquor between you two, maybe more.

"Don't get mad, Stevie! We were havin' fun."

"You were being stupid. You were driving drunk! Without a license!" He's almost vibrating with anger and frustration. Robin's blasé tone pisses him off on a good day, and after putting your life and hers in danger, it does even more so.

"Bite. Me!" You share an even more girlish laugh at Robin's outburst, each word punctuated by a middle finger, like it's the funniest thing in the whole world. "You guys suck ass, you're suffocating us–you guys hate fun!"

Nancy would probably be grabbing Robin's tongue for that foul comment, but she's so out of it she knows that there's no use. She'd probably just laugh it off, or cry, and she doesn't want either of those two extremes to deal with right now. But there is something she has up her sleeve that always works.

"You two made Eddie very upset, you know." Nancy lays her hand on Steve's shoulder as she speaks, silently relaying to him that she's got it under control. A soft "Eddie?" passes your lips. It's incredible how quickly you both snap to attention when she mentions his name, sharing a look between you two before both turning back to listen intently.

"Mhm. He's been up all night worrying about you two. He doesn't like it when you're gone, it makes him scared. You know that." Her voice is stern, but still gentle enough for you two to take in. The 'mom voice' as you, Robin, and Eddie like to call it, which is largely reserved for when she really needs to get firm with one of you. Or all of you.

"Eddie? Where's Eddie?" Your tone wavers, giddiness turning to concern in a matter of syllables.

"Tell us, Nance!" Robin tugs at her sleeve, eyes big and wide with worry.

"He's in his room." Both of you rush past them, hurrying up the steps in a frantic bid to find your beloved boyfriend. You love them all equally, of course–but Eddie is sensitive. Sweet. He's always been that way, but it's increased tenfold since Vecna and caused you to be even more protective over him than you were before. You just want to protect that precious smile no matter what.

"Eddie! We're home, baby!"

It's when you both stumble through the front door that you see him at once. Frazzled, his curly hair mussed, dark circles under his eyes from worry. His nails are bitten down almost completely, bad habit he struggles to kick when he's anxious. He's standing in the living room like he heard the ruckus and had come to see what was happening, but his eyes are clear and set on one of you at a time, switching between like he's assessing that you're both here and both safe.

The two of you rush forward and knock him right off his feet, a startled shriek pulled from his lips followed by a grunt as his back thuds against the carpet, and the two of you collapse on top of him with your full respective weight in a hug so tight he couldn't squirm away if he tried. Even being taken off guard, Eddie squeezes both of you tight in a hug as best he can, a relieved smile flickering across his face as you press desperate kisses to his cheek.

Nancy and Steve step inside, and the sight at their feet just raises a sigh. They might not be happy, but they are glad you're unharmed and in relatively good spirits.

"We're sooooorry, Eddie! Soooo sorry!" You babble, pawing at his neck and his face to plant even more kisses on his lips. He turns only to ruffle Robin's hair and peck her on the forehead, but otherwise his mouth is occupied by yours, and gladly so, if his muffled little gasps and mumbles of "missed you" are any indication.

"What about us? You have an apology for scaring the crap out of us?" Steve asks, irritation still lacing his voice. Part of it is definitely a spark of jealousy, Nancy can tell better than most. It takes you some work and the aid of Eddie's hand, but you get up and stumble over wobbly feet, and throw one arm around Nancy's shoulder and one around Steve's to loosely hug them both.

"M' sorry, Nancy…sorry Stevie….I love you guys soooooooo much.." You maw on each of their cheeks as well, leaving wet kisses by their ears and down their necks as if each one is to make up for one of the many minutes you spent away from them.

"We love you too." Nancy squeezes you back, eyes screwed shut, a breath caught in her lungs as she tries to keep it all in, to keep it together. Breaking down and crying because she was so worried about you would only hurt you.

"I've been bad…"

"Yeah, you have been bad." Steve's hand is in your hair, and despite reaffirming your realization, he's still so gentle with you like you're made of porcelain. As frustrating as he can be, and as much of a dad as he acts like sometimes, he's still so softhearted when it comes to you that it's honestly comical.

"Sooooooo….you gonna punish me?" You pull away to look at both of their faces, and giggle when their eyes widen, and they share a look like they can't believe what you just said. They haven't really seen you drunk very often, so they're not used to the…mood you sometimes get in.

"Not now, baby. But you are gonna make it up to us, later." Nancy tenderly takes your arm off of her and rubs it, trying to be strict but it just comes out soft.

"Aww, Nancy…" Your eyes draw towards Steve, who still has some frustration lingering on his features. He'll never realize how sexy it is–how sexy he is when he's mad. You slide that free arm around his other shoulder, and lean into him for your lips to just barely brush his.

"C'mon, Stevie, wanna feel you inside me…" His shoulders stiffen up and his chest tightens, his lungs at a standstill at the sight of you rubbing your body up against his. And then you lean up, and your lips ghost over his ear, and you whisper that dreaded pet name that sends a shiver up his spine and has him tilting his head up that he wasn't ready for–not in front of the others, at least. "..Wanna be good for you. Promise."

Your little attempt to get him all worked up, and your teeth nibbling at his adam's apple, is interrupted by a soft groan, one that turns all three of your heads towards the two lumps on the floor. When Eddie sits up, he moves to clutch Robin's limp body as she lays against him, who is very clearly asleep and sighing quietly into his neck at the movement.

"Okay, bedtime! C'mon!" With a face still flushed and hot, Steve hups and squats down to wrap his arms around your thighs, before he lifts you up to throw you over his shoulder and starts walking towards Eddie's room. Every step is another bounce and your grin is still loopy and enthused as he does so, while Eddie hauls Robin up to her feet and Nancy supports her by her other arm to lead her the same way. Thankfully it's a short ride, and when Steve flips you back on to the bed and kneels to take your shoes off for you, Robin hangs off your other friends before collapsing into bed beside you. She's so pretty with that red flush to her face, warm and dizzy from the alcohol and laid out on her back, her breasts heaving as she breathes quietly before opening her eyes and turning them towards you.

Once Steve's hands are occupied with carrying off your shoes and no longer ghosting against your ankle, you find yourself moving up on your knees and throwing one over Robin's waist, her fingers lifting up to brace your thigh as you sit gently enough on top of her for it not to hurt. The words have left her vocabulary, but the pleased sigh that she emits at the feeling of you pressed up against her is enough for you to understand.

"Robbie," You lean down to kiss her, and moan the nickname into her mouth. "Wanna do what we did in the backseat…"

"Uh huh…" She whimpers, hands laid out by her head in total submission. Her hips are already rolling against you, mind clearly muddled by need that you apparently haven't satisfied quite yet. Your hands move to unbutton her jeans, your gaze set and tongue flicking out to lick your lips–when Steve grabs you by the wrist and your head tilts to look up at him.

"Prude," You stick your tongue out at him, annoyed at his familiar interruption. Robin wasn't totally wrong, sometimes Steve is such a stick in the mud. He looks genuinely hurt, though, and his eyes fall from yours like he's trying not to show you what he's really feeling.

"Noooo, not the puppy dog eyes…m' sorry for pissin' you off, baby.." His grip loosens on your wrist, but you just grab his instead to pull him close enough for your foreheads to touch. He can't look away now, not even if he wanted to.

"I wasn't really mad, I..I was just…scared." His voice is so rarely this shaky, unsure, that it almost doesn't sound like Steve. Not your confident, headstrong Steve.

"Why?" You smile so innocently, it's nigh impossible to still be mad at you. He knows that, and yet he can never, ever resist it. "I'll always come back, Stevie. Not going anywhere."

A tired smile tweaks at his lips, and he moves to turn away–but you don't let him, and you grab his face to hold it in place.

"I'm not going anywhere, Steve." You sound more sober in that one breath than you have since you got home. More than you ever have, maybe. And he has nothing he can say that can encompass his feelings in that moment, so he just simply nods, and shares a kiss with you that's so damn sweet even with the taste of liquor on your teeth.

Having been relatively quiet until now, Eddie crawls into bed beside you two, his sneakers kicked off but his clothes from the day still on. Nancy's busying herself with pulling up a blanket off the floor to throw over you three, nudging your arm for you to slide off of Robin and cuddle up between the two of them so she can do so. Eddie's breath hitches when your fingertips brush the scars beneath his shirt, the flesh of his belly torn up and only now having healed into what he thinks are ugly scars.

"Eddie's so pretty…" You mumble as you turn to face him, already nodding off with the warmth of both their bodies cushioning you like big, heated pillows. Robin snuggles up to your back and drapes her arm over your waist, and Eddie wedges his arm beneath you two so you can both use it as a pillow, his fingers laced in Robin's hair to help her fall asleep like it always does.

"You're prettier, angelface." His warm breath on your face draws a chuckle from you, and with your eyes closed he kisses your brow before finally settling in to drift off with you. And when Nancy's finished tucking you all in and Steve shuts off the lights, each of you sharing your "I love you"s and "good night"s, the two of them shut the door quietly behind them to leave the three of you in relative peace as you slumber.

It feels like the day has dragged on so long, and in some sense it has–the time is nearing three am if the clock in the hallway is any indication. She and Steve have been awake for far too long, but it doesn't look like he's in any mood to rest by the expression on his face.

"You think we were a little too-"

"Harsh? No." Steve cuts her off abruptly. He knows exactly what she's thinking, he usually does–but this time, for once, Nancy really has no clue what's running through his mind.

"I'm gonna make them regret that tomorrow. I'll slash the tires on that stupid van if it keeps them here." The sudden surge of emotion in his voice takes her by surprise. Almost always, your touch and a few gentle words in that beautiful voice of yours are enough to calm him from whatever is bothering him. He's infamous for falling for your reassurances, giving in to you so often that it's like you're a siren to him, his certainty so often falling to the wayside when you sway him into believing whatever it is you're telling him.

"They might just steal your car, Steve. You know Eddie's got those magic fingers." She waggles her fingers teasingly, she's trying to lighten the mood, and he does chuckle a little at the joke. But the way his face sets immediately after is…intense.

"Not if I break their legs first."

"Steve," Her hand reaches for his arm, but his eyes and his mind are somewhere else.

"Don't." He warns. There's not enough conviction in his voice for her to really be worried about that–at least not now, when not enough has happened for him to really think that's at all a good plan. You haven't scared him enough, but…it does frighten her to think that it's still a possibility, albeit a very small one. Even though it would work, she hates to see you in pain, to see you scared. "Wasn't even my idea. Eddie talks in his sleep."

He steps away with those words lingering on his lips, heading towards the front door to drop your shoes by the others–but not before he reaches over and grabs the bat he's kept since that first night he realized that the world wasn't as safe as he thought it was. He throws the door open, and leans back to call to her before he takes a seat on the step and waits to see if anyone–or anything–followed you two home. Like always.

"...So do you, Nance."

[beanghostprincess]

Trying not to project trans parents leaving in fear of rejection and wanting to protect their family from ridicule and shame but to be reunited with trans child who left the village for the same reason years later on to yasopp and Usopp

Imma just give it to you so you can think about it instead

What if I start crying? What then?

This is such a genius thought, honestly. Thinking about Banchina never telling Usopp about his dad being trans but always saying that if he ever wanted to be more or different than what people viewed him as, that it's perfectly fine (Using this with transmasc Usopp because it's my fav headcanon for him). He never got to tell his mom about him being a boy, but she knew. Looking back at his past now, it was obvious she already knew. After her death, he doesn't see himself capable of anything for a while. The whole village helps him out (people think he's a her. Perhaps just a tomboy, after all. Every time he says he's a boy people think it's just a prank or that he's lying) but he can't be himself completely. The only one who knows about this and believes him is Kaya. Beautiful, wonderful Kaya. She's the only one who supports him. She even gives him clothes because he can't just keep using his dad's old things, and she's the only one with enough money to buy them. Then, the strawhats appear in his life, and he doesn't tell them about... You know... Being a ""girl"" because apparently he passes enough for them to think he's a boy. That, and also that he introduced himself as a boy, and he isn't sure if Luffy is fucking stupid or extremely open-minded or maybe he doesn't care. Either way, he feels like himself with them and sees this as an opportunity to leave the village right away and finally transition without anybody knowing about his past self.

Yasopp sees his wanted poster, then. And he knows that used to be his little girl, and turns out that he was actually his boy. He couldn't be prouder, but there's so much guilt inside of him for not being there for Usopp when he needed it the most... Especially when it turns out he left for no reason at all besides fear. He feels like a coward. That's mainly why he feels so embarrassed to meet Usopp again.

But then they meet again. When Luffy manages to be the king of the pirates and all of them have their own names engraved in history. Yasopp meets his son. And God, he looks so handsome. They even look alike! And he's extremely embarrassed to say anything, and Usopp won't stop crying fearing he won't accept him, and they just end up hugging. Yasopp tells him he couldn't be prouder of his son becoming a better man than he'll ever be. He keeps apologizing over and over again, and Usopp tells him that he understands. That if somebody understands something about running away, it's him. But they're here now and they couldn't be happier.

Also, quick Sanuso mention because it's physically impossible for me not to do it: Usopp introduces his father to Sanji (trans girl, by the way) and,,, Well. She doesn't really like Yasopp for leaving Usopp. She's just like a fucking chihuahua when she meets Yasopp. If you leave her alone with Yasopp she'll probably end up biting his head off. But!!! But Yasopp is amazed because she's genuinely gorgeous and he's like "kiddo, are you sure this is your girlfriend? You're lying to me aren't you-" (he's half joking, don't worry) and it's- It's just so chaotic.

[jaxxsoxxn]

Wait, wait wait that one scene in cinderella3

When Prince charming jumped out the window to go save Cinderella when his father told him he wasn’t allowed to go down the stairs, so he jumped out of the window 

But imagine it it’s with flash and wonder woman and Superman 

Wonder, woman : flash I am not gonna let you rescue that villain. I forbid you to go down these stairs, 

Flash looking at wonder, woman, and Superman and the stairs and looked at the window : mm you know when the woman I never really understood why people jumped out the windows the same people they love, but I see now and now I understand why 

Wonder, woman and Superman : wait what ?

(Flash jumps out the window )

Wonder, woman and Superman : Barry !

I adore the fact that JLA n Rouges are trying their best to keep these two apparat (and failing to do so)

"Barry you know better than to date a villain"

"What about Batman and Catwoman?"

"...I said you know better not that he knows better."

Captain Cold learns that he agrees with any supes and goes absolutely 90 degrees in the other way, suddenly the biggest Boomerflash supporter. It lasts half of the week.

Golden glider talking to Wonder Woman like they're besties while actively being against Harley because, just like her brother, she thinks she took her place and is bitter.

Boomer doesn't want them to think that, especially since he didn't talk to them only because he forgot that he could finally.

Trickster Jr. And Wally have beef for no reason, Axel just says he's not funny, Wally rants about how fucking annoying the villain is or stays completely silent.

Weather Wizard says one time "just kiss already" after they fight near him and the scream they scrum made speedy run to them in fear. Mark doesn't care.

August who back stabbed the Rouges, coming back onto their good side by also being not a fan of Suicide Squad. Floyd said one snarky thing about anyone close to him, and he got into a mood.

"That's why all criminals should die" YOU'RE A MURDERER!! U KILLED PEOPLE!!!

Can you see who's my fave characters? Probably yeah.

Usually Flash wouldn't even let them stop him, especially since his lover was in danger, but Wonder Woman wasn't typically one to be out of her mind like today. "What do you mean by I shouldn't help him?!" he couldn't help and raised his voice, bitterness already growing in his chest. "Diana, I need you to move." "Barry, you need to understand - he's Wallers. Not only will that make problems for us, if she'll learn that you will save him, she'll throw him in more dangerous situations. It's better for both of you if you'll stay put." her tone sounded slightly concerned, her eyes jumping from him to other JLA members for support. "You're not even sure if he's not using your feelings here for a lift or something alike-" "He's bleeding out. I am wasting my important time and his blood is wasting on the floor because you believe that Floyd Lawton- Not even Digger, sent me a message by Hack because they needed a lift. Deadshot, the same man that would rather kill himself than let any supe help." his work tone was slowly sneaking it's way into his speech, not being able to stop it. "Wonder Woman, on everything you love, you'll move out of my way." A quick lip bite was all hesitation he got from her, before she stood in front of him with all her might, Superman slightly more undecided, but also standing next to her. "Flash, as a JLA member you know better. I will not let you take one more step down these stairs." her tone was clearly informing him of the truth of this statement. "You are forbidden from saving this rogue." Within seconds Barry relaxed, stretching his hands above his head, confusing people around them, above few who already shot him amused stares. Hal even showing a thumb up, changing it into some form of scratching his chin to remain unnoticed. "You're right- I won't take a step down these stairs." Barry finally said, his voice having that "costumer service polite" in it, making Wonder Woman just more suspicious. "It must be love pushing me to do stupid things." "Why do you say it like that-" The only other sound that accompanied his flight out of the window next to him was Jordan's loud laughter, which he couldn't hold in any longer. It wasn't the first or last time he was falling from surprising heights, so with ease he landed as trained and ran trough the city towards his home.

Get it, because Digger is his home-

No art today bc amma also write the Boomerflash hcs and hopefully end the Boomer centric ones! <3 Anywho, please ask about other rouges n their relationships with Boomer/Flash/their relationship/ JUST ANYTHING

(I will continue to baby Axel, he done nothing wrong ever [lie])

[strawnav]

@fumalsamakah : 🎲 / a bloody kiss! / accepting.

"Nami!" His voice rings across the battlefield, and her eyes peel open as if on command — she's in pain, of course, but most of what she feels is simple exhaustion. Her hand raises, though, to help her captain find her, slow and shaking but sure. She just about gasps out, "here, Luffy!" a half - second before he skids to a stop, falling to his knees beside her. He asks, "You're not dead, right?" and she barks out a laugh.

"Nope, still kickin'," Nami replies, eyes finally focusing. He doesn't look any better than she does, just as bruised, just as bloodied. Another hard battle. She's in pain and exhausted, but she hadn't been scared, really. Still isn't. "You're okay?"

"Yeah, and I beat him while you were knocked out!"

"I knew that, dummy," the navigator replies. "Help me sit up." He does, a hand at her back, and when she still seems wobbly, he tucks her sitting form into his side. She breathes out a grateful chuckle, mentally cataloguing injuries. A rib or two is for - sure broken, but other than that, it all seems fairly superficial. At least comparatively. "I knew you'd win." Her eyes raise to his, and she smiles, sweet even with the blood in her teeth. "You're gonna be the King of the Pirates, right?"

It's easy, not to be afraid, with a captain like that. With a captain who knows, without a doubt, that he'll succeed. He can't die before he becomes king, so she never really has to be afraid of him losing a fight. And he can't become the king without his crew — without her — so she never has a real reason to believe that she'll die, either. There are moments where instinct outshouts thought, but in the deepest part of her heart, she so rarely fears that Luffy will lose, and therefore so rarely has any reason to fear death. Whenever she does / clutching Tama, terrified, too angry to believe it, too angry to face a life of aloneness again / he always, swiftly, proves her wrong.

Luffy's surprised, concerned expression gives way easily at her abundant confidence. He grins. He glows. She's struck by the memory of how beautiful he'd been in the moonlight, hair pale, eyes wild, joyous and invincible. "Yeah!"

Trusting Luffy is easy, even for somebody like Nami, but it's loving Luffy that's natural. Loving Luffy is joyous. It's so comfortable and easy that it's hard to tell, exactly, where the lines between kinds of love are. Maybe there aren't any lines. Maybe to love Luffy is innately to be in love with Luffy. It's easy to think that, blood in her mouth, blood in his, both beat to hell but smiling. Her hand raises, like it's natural, and curls gently against the back of his head, tugging him closer. He's curious, based on the way his eyes widen, but still smiling, even when he's not quite sure what she's going to do. She doesn't think she's sure, either, until she kisses him.

Barely. The corner of his mouth, almost his cheek. It's slick with blood and warmer than usual, almost burning — he must have used Gear 2 — and he lets her. She feels herself flush, shocked and embarrassed at herself, what the fuck, Nami — steady heart turning hummingbird. But they're both still grinning when she pulls away and lets him do the same.

She'll worry about what it means, to be in love with her captain, later. She'll worry what he thinks of this later. For now, she just says, "Help me up — the others are probably waiting for us."

[giantchasm]

WOE ASKS BE UPON YE

🕸️🦋🥀 for Peony (no i'm not evil wdym)

HEHEHE. Don't worry, I'm evil, too. You've no need to hide.

🕸️ (Spiderweb) - Create a bouquet inspired by your OC! It can be based on their color palette, flower language and symbolism, whatever they like best, or any combination of the three.

Well, obviously there have to be peonies. That one's just kind of a given. As I mentioned in my design for her all grown up, tulips (blue ones, specifically) and crocus have sentimental meaning for her— having originally had sentimental meaning for various members of her family, so they'd have to be there too!

But aside from the more obvious ones... I think she'd also have forget-me-nots (With her seeing it as her duty to remember and honor those that have passed), white lilies, lotus and asphodels (for similar reasons), hydrangeas (representing family roots and persevering love but also arrogance and boasting, which... yeah), and hollyhocks (for ambition).

Is that too many flowers for one bouquet? What's the like... standard for this sort of thing? I suppose going over-the-top in that regard just makes sense considering where she comes from, though.

Interestingly, Peony is moreso associated with dead flowers than living ones, though. So perhaps all of these would be a little bit withered!

🦋 (Butterfly) - Does your OC ‘fear the reaper’, so to speak? If they fused with Morpho Knight, what sort of form would they take on?

Peony has a... complicated, abnormal relationship with death. Not only did she have a near-death experience she blocked out and got superpowers from, giving her the impression that she's some kind of invincible magical girl who can do whatever she wants and escape unscathed, but she's also surrounded by dead people. Death isn't a concept to her in the same way as it is to us, because, "Oh! My friends over there are dead and they're still hanging out with me :)." She sees it as just another stage of life.

That said, her disregard for death's severity also leads to a blatant misunderstanding of its permanence. Not only does she believe she'll never die- or that if she does she'll "find a way out of it," but one of her main goals in life is to find a way to resurrect the ghosts and bring them back for Realsies. She will not listen to anyone when they tell her that is not going to happen.

She's met Morpho Knight a few times. Mostly because of her stubborn defiance and insistence on spitting in death's face.

The first time she ever met it was shortly after her near-death experience. It was extremely angry with the ghosts for intervening in that and threatening to whisk them away to Hades for daring to interfere with the mortal world, but Peony overheard, barged into the conversation and said that if Morpho Knight should punish anyone it should be her, since she was the one who was supposed to die!

It went "okay" and tested her resolve, but when she didn't back down ultimately it didn't have the guts to kill the kid. Stupid Kirby made it go soft. It left, merely giving the group a slap on the wrist and a firm warning to "never break the rules again."

...However, this was Peony's first lesson in learning that she could get away with breaking the rules and only steeled her resolve. She hasn't known the meaning of the word "no" since.

Morpho Knight watches her from a distance, simultaneously admittedly curious about her powers and also wanting to make sure she doesn't get up to too much trouble with them. Occasionally it'll intervene and go "HEY. DON'T FUCKING DO THAT." if she like. Rips someone's soul out of their body and nearly kills them, but for the most part it actually leaves her be.

That said, if she were to ever try and actually go through with her plan to resurrect the dead people, Morpho Knight can and would stop her by force. For all it's softened over the years, it still has a job, and that job is maintaining the balance of life and death. If she were to attempt to undo that balance it would show her none of the same mercy it showed her as a child. It could and would kill her, and eventually it makes this ultimatum known. It's something that very much frustrates and depresses her, because she loves the ghosts a lot and feels like they they're depending on her

But they tell her she's already done so much for her and that she doesn't need to feel bad. Really... they never had the same hope that could ever happen that she did. They had their chance. They lived their lives. They made their mistakes and there's not much they can do about it now. They're lucky to even have a way to communicate with people. They wouldn't ask for more.

I think, in part, the reason Morpho Knight is relatively lenient with Peony is that it's 'training' her. When her own death eventually arrives it thinks her powers could certainly be put to interesting use as a minor grim reaper. She's an apprentice of sorts, even if she doesn't realize it.

I'd love to draw you a Morpho!Peony, but I have like 800 things to illustrate and art has been taking me a ridiculous amount of time to finish recently so that will not be happening. Just have to use your imagination, I suppose.

🥀 (Wilted Rose) - Do they have a Soul form? What would it look and act like? How much control over themselves do they have? Is it still possible to save them, or are they too far gone?

I actually already answered this one! Something-something great (evil) minds think alike ahahaha.

[gamergirlbonestaskforce141riot]

20 for Riot. And „F“ for you.

Heeehehehehe I'm answering all three here if that's alright. Sooo you asked, 20, 24 and 38, AND C, F and G

<3

20. If they were asked to explain the difference between romantic and platonic or familial love, how would they do so?

Mmmhmmmm, well, Riot's only experience with familial love came from her (two sets of) grandparents, because her parents were always away with their work, so her views on family love are a bit askew, and maybe also idealised (in the sense that she thinks it should be X way, but she's not sure if it really is).

That is one of the reasons why she is slow to trust, but if you earn that trust it is rooted deep and solid. The same way, if you betray that trust, you've lost it forever (and you'd be lucky if she doesn't cut you out of her life for good - fool me once, shame on you, fool me twice, shame on me).

If she had to explain the difference between one or another, before Transnistria I think she would have said sexual attraction. If she feels sexual, is not familiar or platonic (she does not (ever) do one night stands, only has sex if there's a connection there). After Transnistria, she thought she'd never feel that again, for fear, or self consciousness, but she's seeing it was a lie.

(Deep and sincere) Familiar love for her is what she feels for Captain Price, Gaz, Gabi, Dr. Heather, Kate Laswell, Zhar and Nik. She'd gladly give her life for them, and would be destroyed emotionally if any of them were missing from her life. She doesn't have many friends as it is, doesn't speak from anyone from her life before the military except for some neighbours that take care of her house and business.

Platonic love is what she feels for Johnny. They are each other's person, and she'd plainly die, no questions, if she didn't have him in her life. She knows (believes) she needs Soap more than he needs her back (which is a fat lie, Johnny feels closer to her than to his own elder sisters), and the mere thought of losing him gives her anxiety.

Romantic love is something she hasn't experimented before, or at least not to the degree she is now (lol). She doesn't have much experience under her belt, because unless she feels a spark she won't make a move or accept a move on her. Before, she would have said the difference was the sexual attraction, now she'd say it's the deep, painful, addicting longing, the greedy and selfish want, the need to have and to keep.

24.  Is sex something that they’re comfortable speaking about? To whom?

Riot considers sex as natural as breathing, even though she doesn't partake in casual sex, and has no problems talking about it, maybe even a bit bluntly sometimes. Not with everyone, of course, for example with Soap has had deep, long talks about it (even giving him tips with previous partners). If you ask her anything about sex, 95% of the time she'll answer.

38. What memory do they revisit the most often?

Riot is not someone who tends to dwell on the past, it is what it is and all that.

She misses her grandparents more than she misses her own parents, so it would be a memory from her home in the mountains, next to the sea, where the forest almost gets cut off by the cliffs over the shore, taking care of the cows and sheep at her grandparent's farm, the smell of the Cantabric sea beating against the rocks, the scent of the trees, the chirping of the birds, the howling of the wolves at night.

C) Did you have trouble figuring out where they fit in their own story?

Well, I read a lot (and still do) about the canon, trying to fit her as best as possible without changing things (at least too much). That's why I decided to set my story AFTER Las Almas and all that (and next game is going to fuck me up, I'm dreading it...).

F) What do you feel when you think of your OC (pride, excitement, frustration, etc)?

Most of the time, pride. She is everything I am, but better, way better, and at the same time, I also feel sadness for the very same reason.

G) What trait of theirs bothers you the most?

Their inability of accept praise (pot calling kettle here), to accept they're good enough, and that they are stubborn like a mad bull, the type where she'll be bleeding but pushing forward just because she has to live up to her reputation (too stubborn to just lie down and lie). She's Riot, FFS.

[anonymous-prince]

apparently i'm about to reach out to my biological mom, who was the main source of my childhood trauma and who i have not seen since i was like 12 (when my grandparents finally got full custody after an 8 year custody battle). because my grandparents are not great and i've finally been realizing and accepting that. i cannot deal with living here much longer but they've made it so i'm basically trapped and unable to leave, and i have no one else to turn to because they've spent my entire life convincing all of them that i'm a "problem child" who is "out to get them" and that they're the most perfect, ideal parents ever. (which i bet is the exact same thing they did with my bio mom.. she had her issues, but i think they villainized her instead of helping her. and also never admitted that they also made mistakes and are not as amazing as they believe themselves to be.)

so ironic. bio mom abused and traumatized me, grandparents stepped in to help get me away from her. then my grandparents also abuse and traumatize me.. so now i'm turning back to my bio mom hoping for help and understanding, since she was definitely also a victim of them.

i'm genuinely completely over all the trauma caused by my bio mom, got over it 2-3 years ago (at age 18-19.) and adding onto that the fact that i've come to the realization that my bio mom likely dealt with a lot of the same things i've been through thanks to my grandparents (her parents).. i def feel like i have a bit more understanding of why she was the way she was. and from what little i can see online, it looks like her life is a lot more normal and healthy now.

idk, at this point i just feel like "what's the worst that could happen?" and just.. something, anything needs to change. because as it stands i've been here wasting years of my life because my grandparents are basically keeping me trapped here and making my life hell and i'm sick of it. i want freedom, i want my own life, i want to exist, i want out of this fucking house.

also there's the fact that on the rare occasions that my grandmother would talk to my bio mom, my bio mom would literally always try to ask about me and how i was doing, so it seems like she did/hopefully still does care/have some interest in me.

and uh, vaguely related thought, but i just realized that it made me strangely happy to remember that my bio mom always called me her "kiddo" instead of her "daughter." like i don't recall her ever calling me her "daughter," it was always "kiddo."

and leading off of that, honestly my biggest fear with contacting her is having to come out to her as trans lmfao. i'm like 90% sure she's bisexual so that gives me a bit of hope that she'll be accepting and supportive, but ahhh what if she's not :sob: i guess we'll see lol

edit 2 days later: she blocked me and privated her account without responding. didn't even wait to see what i wanted to talk about :) i understand but also i do not, because my entire childhood and even up until like 2 years ago she would always ask my mom about me, ask how i was doing, ask if she could talk to me. but now that i'm ready to talk to her, she doesn't want to. why is this my life lmfao, i'm so fucking alone

[silasbug]

fondly thinking about my best friend.

no idea how she's managed to stick it out with me this far but i'm amazed that after over 6 years she still has enough patience to tolerate me.

when i don't feel like i'm good enough, she reminds me of who i am. when i make mistakes, she doesn't treat me any different. when i'm highly dysphoric, she just /gets/ it and shows me unrelenting support and encouragement. she's my #1 hypeman, and i am hers.

there isn't another person in the world that's been able to make me feel even.. remotely okay in my own skin, about how i look and how a body feels (i would also say about who i am, but i'd be lying).

i realize that i've always had a bit of body dysmorphia and generally don't enjoy looking at my own face because it's.. very uncanny to me. i don't have a proper sense of style. but she always just?? has something nice to say and she does it so genuinely that you can actually believe that she means what she says. because she's the same.

i'll go out looking like a 12 year old boy and she's just. fucking. there for it. she'll cheer for it. do it with me. and then we'll walk around the block looking like two lil' dudebros together because we own the same clothes. and fucking hell.

this girl is too good to me. i absolutely don't deserve her.

sometimes it's hard to believe that someone like her exists.

and that i get to be witness to it.

there's caveats, of course. we talk so rarely (we go weeks without), the interests we share are few and far between and there's.. so many things i could never tell her because i will never get over that fear of losing her.

there is no right moment and there isn't a time and those are things i neither need nor want her to know, because it would change the way she sees me.

and i guess that seems callous and detached and dishonest.

but we are there when it matters. i am there when she needs me and i will always pick up her pieces.

i want her to have a good thing. she sees me as a good thing.

so i'll let her have me this way.

[anyaalrich]

I'm posting this because I want a "paper" trail showing that; if my stepsons are kidnapped or I or their daddy are "eliminated" ..... I Fucking Called It!

I wish I was kidding.....

This is the kind of shit I'm scared to death of right now and I can't even say it out loud for fear of sounding irrational. Which is another reason I'm venting it here.

Quick back story: I'm stepmom to 2 boys (4 & 6) and their bio-mom keeps doing all kinds of "seemingly nothing" things that, when added to their own back story and compiled with context, feel, to me, like she's up to something super fucking shady.

Before me, she'd made multiple threats to Michael (their daddy) to abduct them, throwing it in his face that she had all their documents so there would be nothing he could do especially with police present. She specifically mentioned taking them to New York... remember that...

Now that they're in our home by law, she's refusing to give them their birth certificates, Socials, shot records, etc... and went to the 6 year old's school to have lunch with him and he came home saying something to the effect of "I'm not supposed to say anything but mommy said we would be going to New York with her soon..." .... wtf

She used to beat the shit out of Michael on the regular... even if he was holding one of the boys. She lodged a fucking butcher knife into his arm once... but has the audacity to claim he abused her.

Let me tell you.... I have backed this man into a corner in a bratty, drunken fit and he barely even got angry. He's not soft, by any means but he's kind to his core. Ain't no fucking way.

Now she has tricked the boys into showing her where we live! LIKE, WHY??? Not only did he prompt this conversation to begin with, but when asked "Did you want to show mommy where you live or did she ask you to show her?" he said "mommy asked me to show her". She drove through our neighborhood and had the boys point out which house was ours.

There is no other reason besides ill intent!

Michael put cameras up immediately, notified the caseworker, and has shown me what my weapon options are and how to get them if I need them. He keeps saying "she's not going to do anything crazy, especially right now because she's under the microscope of the system. And I know he doesn't want to believe for one second that he can't protect us. He's not egotistical. But every case I've ever seen like this where a parent harms or kills, they always downplayed the signs. "They would never go that far" until they go that far.

I don't know for sure who shot the parents in this video.... I'm not saying the 2 situations are the same, but, while watching it, I felt like I could see my future. She'll cover her tracks by having someone else kill us and creating an alibi, but she won't give a shit if the kids are there and traumatized by our murders. I guarantee it. They're just property to her.

[psychomanix]

I am a deeply complicated person on the inside. I have the worst times trying to tell people how I feel because in the past, almost constantly, was it swept aside for someone else's problems to be heard. Over time, no matter how many times people say they care, deep down, I don't believe that, ever. Based on past experiences, it doesn't make sense that someone would actually care when constantly shown otherwise by people throughout my life, even family, especially family.

I don't deserve anyone's time, attention, or love, as that's been shown to me not to be something people would willingly give me. I'm not a good communicator, I'm not good at being empathetic, and I have terrible comprehension skills. The best I can give is good hugs, hearty laughs, and delicious food.

I wish I was different, i wish some people actuallycared about me..... actually, I wouldn't say that, because yes, some people do care about me, but I don't know, I just wish I was different and fit into the cog of the machine of this universe. I wish my brain functioned like a regular person without mental illnesses. That way I didn't feel so fucking stupid half the time when I don't understand where others are coming from and actually comprhened what's being said straight up instead of reading between every line.

I wish I wasn't filled with so much self-hatred... life would be immensely easier if I actually thought highly of myself because then I could stand up for my inner teenager and child. They're severely damaged and deserved more than they were even given. Even just the benefit of the doubt would've been a blessing, but no, they weren't even given that. They didn't fit the mold of my family, so they were constantly judged for not being someone someone else wanted. Told constantly they should be the opposite of who they are in fear the family would be judged for not raising the perfect offspring they so gladly paid for.

To many, I am just a good time they can use to benefit their own life without ever considering my own wellbeing. "Oh, Kat? she's a really good listener, but we don't care if she has problems too. She'll have answers for us, but we'd never in life give her any answers back or even a listening ear." Over and over and over again, I'm assumed to be strong, assumed that my life is just a party to be a part of. Assumed that my problems are nothing other than small benign dramas that don't deserve even the time of day.

No friends genuinely check in on me anymore, what the fuck is up with that? I'm constantly the type of person to check in, and make sure I can do anything within reason to make sure a person feels better, but I don't get that in return? Their problems always will be bigger than mine? what? because I'm not the normal person who would deserve that kind of time? what the fuck is it about me that keeps people close, but not close enough to actually care about what goes on in my OWN brain?

I don't feel safe confiding in anyone anymore without thinking... no, knowing that it just matters ever so slightly, but never enough to take the time out of their day just to hear what I'm going through inside. I'll always be someone people get but don't understand. I've never been shown otherwise, or that's how it feels. I could be wrong..

All of these feelings feel redundant anyhow because low and behold, I make people feel this exact same way..... and it just cancels out my own distress. I can't keep putting my feelings on a back burner due to fear, but when will I feel safe enough to take them off that burner? because I still don't feel safe to do so and probably never will.... I'm constantly draining my own sense of self-worth because it's just easier caring about others and forgetting myself in the process. If people can't take genuine time for me even though they say they are, why should I even give an inch of that care back to myself? I don't feel I deserve it because most people my whole life have never made me feel like I do.

"Life is a garden. With care and love, you can cultivate beautiful flowers." - Author Unknown

thought to end my thoughts with a positive life affirming analogy because why not?

[downins]

hi! can I make a request for a sae-byeok x female reader where they’re best friends in college (squid game didn’t happen) and they’re both in love with each other but the reader has an on again, off again bf who treats her badly and one day she comes to sae crying after he hurt her again and Sae just confesses?? And there’s a happy ending?? I hope that makes sense ((:

"She was right there all along" Kang Sae Byeok x fem!reader [ oneshot ]

a/n: oh to be loved by sae byeok

warnings: cursing

Here you go again, staring at the ceiling, hoping for a notification from your asshole boyfriend. You see, the two of you are stable but also not stable at the same time. You don't know why you're clinging onto this relationship, all you wanted was a happy and healthy relationship. But apparently your boyfriend here seems to have some problem trying to understand that. You're busy with your classes and assignments, he's busy out there doing god knows what.

Why do you still stay with him? He rarely texts you back, even if he did it will be after like 9 hours. He's always "occupied" but he's always gaming with his friends. This happened a lot, you ignored it the first few times because you want him to have some space. You've been treated like a background character for a really long time. He always has time for his friends to play basketball or going to the arcade but he can't even spend half of a day with you?

"Ugh, finally." Your phone started buzzing and ringing. You used your thumb to tap on the green button, trying to greet him with a happy tone. "Hey you finally called me back" , you were happy but also disappointed at the same time. "Can you stop texting me when I'm with my friends? You're really fucking annoying." His tone was so harsh, you just wanted to check up on him because you're scared that he got into some accident. "No the fuck? Throughout this relationship, you've always looked at me like I'm some kind of disposable trash that you can just simply throw away, I've cared about you so much and this is how you repay me?"

Mad. You were so upset about everything. All you wanted to do was be a good girlfriend for your partner and in return you get ignored and hurt. "Listen to me, I'm not some 5 year old kid who needs a babysitter to constantly bug me. If you don't like the way I treat you then leave you crazy bitch."

Uh oh, that's it you were so done with him and his bullshit. You ended the call and started tearing up. He tortured you mentally, made you miserable. But at the same time he has this special love for you? You never understood that feeling. You hated him for that, a lot. You knew he's going to cut you deep and leave a scar one day, but you still refused to walk away.

You heard your phone ringing again, you thought that this was him. This is pretty much like a protocol to you, both of you fight and he's going to start searching your name through his contacts and you're back to your one-sided relationship again.

You answered the phone without looking at the name.

"I swear to god I'm so fucking do-"

"Y/n? Are you crying?"

Oh. It was your fruity bestfriend, Kang Sae Byeok. You two met in college, you were her only friend in class because she doesn't really bond well with others and you looked so approachable. And that's how the both of you became besties.

"OH SAE- IM FINE IM JUST HAVING SOME FLU"

"Y/n cut the bullshit, what did he do this time?"

"Fine, he told me not to "bug" him anymore and I'm a psycho."

"I'm on my way to your dorm."

You can't believe it, everytime you finish arguing with your boyfriend. You'll always go to her and she never gets tired of comforting you, she'll always hug you and even cook for you. From time to time, you think that she's in love with you but you didn't want to believe that it was real.

"Y/n, Sae Byeok is here, she says that she wants to meet you so I'll give the both of you some privacy. Just gonna chill on the couch and catch up on Fear Street." Your roommate knocked on your door, gesturing Sae to go inside your room. "So what happened this time hm?" Sae laid against the wall after closing your door. "Am I annoying for caring about my own boyfriend?" You just finished crying but you can feel your tears slowly forming in your eyes.

"Hye Y/n.. no no you're not annoying. He just doesn't know how to appreciate you." She walked towards you. "I can't do this anymore, it's always the same cycle. We fight like we do it just for fun. I end up crying and you have to take care of me again. Aren't you exhausted? With me and my boyfriend's drama? If I were you, I would've just left this friendship." She wrapped her arms around you.

"Y/n, it's so obvious." She ran her fingers through your hair.

"What is obvious?"

Sae gently used her fingers to lift your chin up, wiping your tears away. “I like you but you keep going back to that same guy.” You stayed silent while looking at her. Y/n you have always been in love with her, ever since the day she asked you for help with the maths homework. Thank god you’re smart. 

You were shocked but you kind of got the feeling that she’s had a crush on you. Scared to make the wrong decision so you kept quiet about it. 

“Sae can you look at me one more time?” 

“Wh-”

You quickly placed a kiss on her lips and smiled at her. Well, that was fast. Her eyes widened at your actions, she thought that you hated her for the confession but you’re one fruity human being too. 

“Well that was unexpected.. I love you?” 

“Love you too.” 

[jeweled-blue-eyes]

hey, may i ask, why do you dislike lucas! just wanna know i’m pretty curious bc everyone loves him lol. also, what about luc//athy? i wanna know your thought process. i’m not on either side, really. i don’t ship stuff but i’m invested in the drama of this fandom lmao

1. he calls Athy an idiot

2. the way he disrespects Jennette and refuses to treat her as a human being by calling her chimera

3. how the narrative tries to make me care for him so badly that it almost feels manipulative (he had abusive parents, then got adopted by another abusive parental figure after his parents abandoned him). In the 200+ years he lived there was no one who cared about him.

4. threatened to kill her (I think?), threatened to kill Blackie even though he knew it was basically her soul animal and the loss would wound her deeply

5. how he kind of enjoyed the power he had over her because he saved her and blackie and how he acted all innocent in front of others and Athy didn't dare to tell her father (did she fear that he wouldn't believe her?)

6. "Your father cares alot about you." Said father is a mass murderer who considered to murder her multiple times. Their relationship is toxic to the max, how Claude sees her mother in her till the day of her debutante ball, their images literally overlapping (it's not cute), how he doesn't want her to meet other people or ever leave the palace, how she has created a fake persona to please him. How does Lucas not realize that this is a toxic relationship when he is over 200+ years old and has likely seen stuff like this before? Lucas knows that Athy is/was deep down fucking terrified of her father since their first encounter where he pointed out that Blackie always runs away, because her divine beast reflects her inner desire to escape the palace. And despite all that he says that Claude cares about her, which might have influenced Athy in her decision to go back to Claude after the murder attempt and forgive him.

5. he ate LP Athy's mana beast and then fucked off to work with the Imperial Wizards and didn't even intervene when LP Athy got executed. He was possibly indirectly responsible for her death since she couldn't use her mana to escape and got killed.

6. so ready to commit genocide on innocents if Athy had died (I only like stuff like this if it's yanderes doing it)

7. appears in her bedroom at night when she is sleeping and touches her her and stuff. I think he also put her to sleep without asking for consens, which is something Claude also did.

8. everyone worships him and treats him like a god. if you don't worship him you are evil.

9. interrupts Athykiel scenes all the time and copied Ijekiel's handkiss in the library. After he saw Ijekiel kiss her hand he did the same. Made himself taller than Ijekiel. Stole Ijekiel's title as soft charisma prince at the tea party.

10. some of his fans

This scene made me dislike him alot:

I can't really explain why but when he destroyed the effort Athy had put into braiding his hair and adorning them with flowers, and how he acted rudely afterwards...this is the scene where I came to realize how much I disliked him. Idk why it's something so minor and insignificant.

11. I'm biased af, but in my opinion Lucathy is detrimental to Athy's character. Once I saw someone argue that the reason why Lucas is so perfect for Athy is, because she has daddy issues and Lucas is similar to her father and...well they are not wrong but this is actually a reason why I think they should never be together. (Unless you want to make it a toxic relationship.) She'll never get rid of her role as a living emotional crutch and morality chain. The way she seeks out a romantic relationship with boy who has a similar personality to her father, reminds me how some abusive victims have a tendency to latch onto toxic people, because this kind of behaviour feels familiar and comforting. They are used to it, they know how to deal with that.