#but the optimist in me likes to think of a best ending scenario where he's able to get Stone back

[moonsidesong]

i like how much hfjone gives me thinky thoughts. ending spins around in my brain going wheeee whats gonna happen now who knooooows

[asukiess]

THAT ADRIEN & CLAW SCENE..... that steals my breath honestly. adrien has the courage to face himself--pretty much the most side of him that could have won him over: full of grief and misery and shutting himself up inside and putting up barriers. like that's his vulnerable beauty!! is that adrien claws and digs and tries his BEST to be optimistic, to move forward, to move past all that which could crumble him. we've seen him in kuro neko and jubilation (I think? depression nest adrien you know?) where he succumbs and lays in bed and curls into himself.

and the fact he is looking at Claw through all of this, but looks away right when he says "I can't say I haven't thought about it" because it's shameful! ladybug is his partner and the love of his life and STILL he's thought about different scenarios. probably multiple times. that probably leaves him feeling so guilty for even entertaining the idea. he can admit many things to himself, but this one is hard.

and we know it will STILL plagues him after this, when he talks about the idea directly to ladybug in passion.

and that gentle little nod he gives himself... like yes, our mother. yes, I know every horrible thing that's in your heart because it is mine, too. he's just so gentle with himself, it's so endearing to me. it's a kind of fragile care with yourself when you've had the same conversation over and over again and it's tired and it's a bruise that you keep going back to, checking on it, tending to it, and yet that's just how grief is.

"I'm as well as I can be, anyway" HELLO? I mean we already thought of him as coping in multiple ways, but this means everything to me?? our adrien decides every day to try again, try to be happy as emilie wanted him to be.

(will he always settle? will he always feel there's a baseline? as well as I can be, anyway.....)

this is art, to me. hang this up. core adrien moment for me.

and then I realize that he has ALL this hope for himself, all this acceptance of that hate and grief and sorrow could manifest through him like this...

and then how by the end of s5, he's TERRIFIED of becoming the chat noir in his nightmares.

[grandlinedreams]

Hello, I've been reading Ur fics lately (esp with law) and I love them

I was wondering if you could make angst? Like... Let's say there's this big battle, like the one in wano, where reader and law gets separated, but after the battle Law finds reader unconscious and being treated by chopper who then explains they had severe wounds and might need blood transfusion.

It also just happens that he was gonna confess to them after all of the chaos so that they'd be safe in his arms. And that might not even happen since now they have each foot on both worlds.

I'd imagine Law going along with talking to them even if they're unconscious just to keep them here in the living. (If they're alone ofc)

I hope that's alright

OUGH some angst my beloved,,,i can absolutely do that, I hope I do this justice for you!!

[Heads up!: angst, serious injuries, some brief medical talk, hurt/very little comfort, keeping in line w Law literally calling none of the Strawhats by their names, open-ended]

Truth be told, Law doesn't keep much of an eye on you during battles. It's hard enough keeping an eye on what the enemy is doing ㅡ especially if the Strawhats are involved. They ㅡ especially their captain ㅡ have a knack for blowing careful plans out of the water and he's forced to play damage control until it's over.

You're also fully capable of looking after yourself, and he trusts you and your skillset. So when he doesn't immediately find you once things have started settling down, he doesn't think much of it.

When five minutes turns to ten, then to fifteen, then half an hour, however, alarm bells start going off in his head. You've never taken this long to check in with him. Has something happened? Have you beenㅡ

No, he won't let himself think of that option. Not now, not ever. So he keeps as optimistic as reality will allow him ㅡ until he hears his name being called.

"Oi, Law!"

It's Sanji. "What is it, Blackleg?"

The blond's expression is his first warning that whatever it is, it isn't pleasant. "Chopper told me to come get you."

That's his second warning. Eyes narrowing and trying to rifle through potential scenarios from best case to worst, he follows Sanji silently until they reach where Chopper is ㅡ and Law stares at who the little reindeer is desperately trying to patch up.

It's you.

Part of him whispers harshly that this is par for the course, that he's worn out his luck in terms of keeping you safe ㅡ another notes that he's never seen you look more fragile.

"What happened." It's a demand as he takes in the bandages all over you, trying not to think about how most of them are already soaked with blood. Your blood.

He barely hears the explanation above the rising ringing in his ears, but he gathers enough to find it in himself to mentally curse your perchance for heroics. He's told you time and time again that your self-sacrificing attitude will get you into trouble, and now it has. (As if he isn't guilty of it too from time to time, but that's neither here nor there.)

"They need a transfusion," he says, kneels to gather you into his arms, trying not to focus on how limp you are. "I'll take it from here."

If Chopper protests, he doesn't stick around long enough to hear it. From the second he sets foot back on the Polar Tang, it's a blur.

Bandages are stripped from you and replaced, an IV of fluid in one arm, blood in the other. One of the defaults to joining the crew is letting him know blood type so he has it on hand, and he's never been more grateful to have it and less so that he needs to use it.

For the next few hours, Law hardly blinks, barely lets himself breathe ㅡ afraid that somewhere between, you'll slip from him. He can feel the cold circle of death around you, measuring, evaluating. Deciding if you go, or if you stay.

He wants you to stay. If there were ever a way to guarantee that you do, he'd do it now ㅡ but there isn't. So he sits, counts your breath (in, out. Up, down.), and waits.

And he talks.

He tells you that you're a pain, that you need to stop thinking so much of others before yourself, that a quality like that is only admirable until it means a grave instead of life. That you shouldn't be so cavalier with your time, that there are people who care about you, and what are they supposed to do if you die?

He means himself in that too. He's gotten accustomed to your presence, the way you've slotted your way into his routines and habits like you belong, and perhaps, were he a romantic, he'd say you always have. But he hardly has time for that, barely lets himself entertain it ㅡ too soft, too ideal, too good to be true. Always too much of something.

But he wants it, wants you ㅡ wonders if he'll even get the slimmest chance to tell you now. Law could tell you now, but he doesn't. He's afraid if he does, it'll tip the scales further from his favor and he'll undoubtedly lose you.

He can't do that.

It isn't fair ㅡ but when has the world ever felt fit to treat him in a way that could ever be seen as kind enough to be called fair?

[tinystepsforward]

i've still been keeping tabs on what's happening at automattic. a couple of things i've observed:

toni schneider (who is a man btw), the interim ceo, has been quite open with staff in ways that mean they generally seem relieved to have him leading the company for now. i've heard people speak optimistically about him from all parts of the spectrum (by which i mean: staff who are trans tumblr users right through to staff who are "anti-woke" or whatever and were absolutely intolerable to work with as a trans person), which seems like... a good sign? maybe.

this relative transparency includes things like weekly updates from an executive level, as well as openly saying that he did have to directly speak to matt and encourage him to, you know, stop posting.

matt is back to his usual milquetoast blogging, and replied to someone on mastodon about the AI issue saying he'd comment on it when he's back in may, so whatever toni said to him seems to have worked for him keeping out of it for now.

people have no idea what it's gonna look like when matt's back.

the best case scenario is that schneider manages to create a significant enough boost in morale and productivity that "it'd be nice if we just kept him" becomes a sentiment that isn't held just by the rank and file. i don't know how likely that is, but there's a sense of cautious hope and of making the most of this reprieve from matt's increasingly erratic decisions no matter what.

the tumblr staff statement was approved by schneider and hr, so i am also hopeful they won't face repercussions. what they said might seem pretty mild from the outside, or carefully worded, but it's pretty clear to me and to most people who've worked at companies like this that it's a pretty bold one.

i'll quote a friend:

keep reminding the more histrionic elements out there that: 1. there really are trans people, INCLUDING TRANS WOMEN, in the fight here. 2. we don't have nearly the power they seem to think we do. 3. we're fighting anyway. was the statement we wrote enough? fuck no. does it fix everything? fuck no. but we literally called out the CEO, and got the greenlight for it from the interim CEO. i don't know where this will end, but that's not nothing.

i'm not sure automattic deserves the immense honor of having this many of its brave, dedicated trans staff put effort into trying to make it better. but it has them, and it would be wise to do its best to keep them. so many of us — even me, even now — believe in the ideals that drew us to the work automattic does, and hope that it can return to them. we will see!

other things i want to say:

the wellbeing of my friends on staff is my priority. i am interested primarily in their safety, and won't pressure them to give me goss. the ways i've spoken publicly are already pretty scary to people who might worry about retaliation against them just for being known to be my friend.

this is a regular personal blog. i'll keep updating if there's shit to update about, but i also don't work at automattic any more (thank fuck, again), have a life, and am not interested in declaring matt my specific nemesis or otherwise acting purely out of spite.

some of youse really deeply do not understand companies, the internet, generative ai, or pretty much anything else i've said. that's okay — big tech in particular is fucked up on purpose bc it benefits those in power to have it be incomprehensible! but maybe it's not a great position from which to get mad at me specifically or at staff for idk not personally assassinating matt.

got tired of blocking transphobes so i've turned anons off. i'll probably flick them back on eventually.

[bots-and-cons]

Tiny ficlet/or hc’s/ or whatever your heart feels

Ratchet befriends a local coffee shop owner (afab) when the owner swung through the hospital June works at to give the night shift nurses free caffeine on the house has a treat. June was letting Ratchet shadow her in holoform on her shift after Ratchet asked to learn more medical info for humans in case the teams human partners ever need med attention. Maybe light banter/ how relationship develops either romantically or just has friends / Mr- caffeine-is-bad-for-you-Ratchet vs up-all-night-barista-jugging-coffee-by-the-gallon

Uuu, I like this idea. I felt like HCs was the best fit for this. I felt like a scenario would get way too long for me, and it would also take forever to write, so HCs it is. Also I don’t drink any kind of coffee, so forgive my ignorance on that front. I tagged this as humanformers, since it’s holoform stuff

•He’s never been one for coffee, but he decided to try it out one late evening

•Your coffee shop is open really late, and after he tasted the coffee in the hospital break room, he wasn’t very optimistic that it was going to be any good either

•There were a lot of options and he had a hard time deciding, so he asked you what you would recommend

•You asked him what he liked and he confessed he hadn’t really drank much coffee before

•There aren’t really any other customers around, and you think he’s kinda cute, so you offer to let him sample a couple of things, and if he doesn’t like them, you can just drink them yourself

•You make him a latte and an americano and let him taste some of both

•He decides he likes the americano more and orders a cup to go

•You chat with him while making the drink, and he finds that you’re very nice to talk to

•Ratchet talks with you about some stuff, and before he knows it, his break is over, and he’s already late with getting back to June

•He thinks his coffee runs might turn into a habit whenever he’s at the hospital

•You hope to see him again soon, and he does come by every now and then

•You hadn’t been able to do it for a while, but you decide to take coffee to the nurses that you’re friendly with, and you’re hoping to see Ratchet too

•You close up shop and carry as much coffee to the closest nurse’s station as you can

•The nurses are all very happy to see you and a lot of them joke about how much better your coffee is compared to what they have in the break room

•Ratchet also happens to be there that night, and he’s happy to see you, which he doesn’t really make known, he just greets you kindly and the two of you start talking while he sips his coffee

•Ratchet still doesn’t exactly like coffee, but he noticed it helps keep him awake, and it’s a good excuse to come see you

•He starts to come by the coffee shop more and more, and eventually you ask him out by writing it on the cup

•Ratchet almost doesn’t notice the little text on the cup, and he throws it away, but as it’s going into the trash, he notices you wrote something on it, and he gets it out of the trash can to check

•He’s glad he did, because you wrote your phone number and a “wanna go out?” on it

•You notice him digging the cup out of the trash can, and chuckle to yourself

•Ratchet sends you a message like ten minutes later

•”Yes, I would like to go out with you” it says

•You’re all smiles for the rest of the day and to be honest, he can feel himself smiling a lot too, especially after you ask him “Where would you like to go?”

•You set up a date and as it draws nearer, Ratchet finds himself getting increasingly nervous

•He doesn’t really know how he ended up in this situation, but now he’s going out with a human, and he’s very happy with you

[thelamb1429]

Soul Train

Eyeless Jack x GN! Reader

<3

This is part of a larger series i’m working on. For now i’m just gonna post lil snippets of the fanfic just to sort of get a feel for how i want the story to go.

This is also probably poorly written/has a lot of grammatical errors because i’m currently pretty sick right now so i’m writing with a scrambled brain atm. I’ll be back to spruce things up when i feel better!

STORY INFO/WARNINGS

Reader is gender neutral

This isn’t necessarily a oneshot, but i don’t know if i plan on posting chapters here on Tumblr when I should probably just post the whole story on another platform so that my art isn’t drowning under tons of stories lol

This part includes: Mentions of death, mentions of death regarding a parent, descriptions of panic, slight mentions of murder

Every single last ounce of oxygen seemed to be sucked from your burning lungs at full force, leaving you on your knees, coughing and retching while the silent vehicle raced down the tracks. Car after car flew over the metal just a few feet from where you knelt. The moment you could breathe enough for your vision to fade back in and your ears to slowly stop ringing, all you could see as far as your eyes traced down the railroad tracks was a never ending train. You sat there for about a minute, but it seemed like the train wasn’t ever going to end.

Nina looped an arm under yours to help you back onto your feet, and you were so out of it that you couldn’t even feel the pointy accessories on her arms and hands poke into your skin. Despite the train in front of you both not emitting a deafening whistle, the rustle of metal on metal was enough to block out any words she tried to get into your head. Everything in front of you moved in slow motion as the weight of the situation set in.

Jack was probably dead now.

You could have saved him.

He probably died thinking that you would get there in time to help.

Once again you went limp in your best friend’s arms, to which she stumbled and struggled to catch your weakened body. Nina eased the both of you onto the grass as the train finally passed and the red glare of the warning lights went dark. Her eyes looked past the tracks onto the dirt road beyond, as if to try and manifest the best case scenario. She wasn’t an optimist by any means, but she knew how much Jack meant to you. You two had been friends for years now, long before you went off to college. While the decked out girl holding onto you had never even met the guy, she felt a cold chill eat away at her spine as it rushed through her nerves, making the rapidly beating heart in her chest speed up with the anxiety caused by the both of you panicking.

But she'd known death much closer than you had. You had lost many loved ones, but her little hobby brought her up close and personal with it several times a week. For once, Nina felt a determination to lead that didn't scare her off. Calling the shots wasn't something that she liked to take charge of, but this was the perfect moment for her to take the lead, to do something helpful for you. She didn't have many friends, especially none that could understand her and handle her like you did.

Maybe helping you get to Jack could help you both strengthen the bond that was weakened by the argument from the week prior to the crisis at hand.

Determined to help, Nina once again hoisted you up and looked you in the eyes.

"[Name], I know that right now you're pissed at me. And I lied to you, I deserve your anger right now. But if we have any chance of getting into that forest and saving Jack, we have to get up and do it now. That cult— or whatever the hell they are— they're dangerous and Jack has no clue.

You love him, right? Then we need to get to him and get him back into your arms, safe and sound.

So take a deep breath and get up already! I can't find him on my own. I don't even know what he looks like!"

Nina pulled at your arms, groaning with the force of exertion she put out as you seemed to stay in place, frozen from the terror of losing the only man who you'd ever considered to have a shred of humanity in him. The only man who befriended you with no ulterior motives. The only man you knew who treated you as an equal.

You weren't gonna lose him. You had to stop mourning for a death you couldn't even confirm.

Much to your best friend's relief, you started running off past the cleared tracks, leading the way towards the countryside where the forest began. Cold, bitter air nipped at both of your bodies and filled your lungs, causing your throats to ache with the icy chill that seeped into you both as you inhaled air.

Contrary to popular belief, Nina was not good at running! She was used to cornering her victims in locations that allowed for her to easily escape and march back to her hidden little cabin in the woods at a leisurely pace. When she wanted to run, she ran pretty fast, but it was obvious that she wasn't used to running for so long. Since she was trying her best to help, you attempted to slow down just a bit so that she could catch up.

After five minutes of running down the road, Nina had to stop to breathe. She gasped for air as he chest heaved, trying to get more oxygen into her burning lungs. She looked up at you, taking in the panic evident on your face when she collapsed. Her mascara ran down her face just a little when her eyes watered from the excessive running.

"Go— you..you need to find him. I'll catch up, just go", she wheezed out as a cough wracked through her body.

The encouragement was all you needed to take off running once again.

Maybe it was the adrenaline in your body that kept you going, masking the ache in your chest and your legs from the constant sprinting you were doing. Maybe it was the fear that if you didn't suck it up and run, that it would be too late. Whatever it was, it caused you to keep running so fast that it felt as if you were gliding through the forest around you.

You had no idea where exactly he was. In fact, you were going in blind. But there was something deep within the core of your very being that seemed to yank you in one direction before leading you towards another.

All you could do was repeat a silent prayer that you hadn't said in years. Not since your mom died.

All you could do was pray to whatever higher being that could exist to let Jack still be alive when you find him.

Credits for the dividers i used go to poicelain and kgymz!! <3

[youling-the-ghost]

I just got caught up on the bnha manga and boy do I have some thoughts about the future of the series. OBVIOUS SPOILER WARNING IS OBVIOUS

I don't know how to feel about the fact that bnha could be ending soon. On one hand, I'm glad that the final war arc is finally reaching its conclusion, but on the other hand, there are so many loose ends that I'm worried will never be tied up. I'm mostly worried about the future of class 1-A because every scenario that I thought of had something wrong with it:

Class 1-A continues studying at UA as if nothing had happened. This doesn't quite sit well with me because let's be real here, all of class 1-A were all more heroic than most of the Pro Heroes. Having them continue studying at UA would feel almost disingenuous to the entire final war arc. Despite this, I still feel like this is the best option for class 1-A. After everything that has happened, a sense of normalcy would probably be appreciated. Plus I'd love to see Shinsou as part of the hero course in their second year.

Class 1-A graduates from UA by default and all become Pro Heroes. I don't like this scenario for more personal reasons. The main reason why I love bnha so much is its academia aspects; I loved seeing the characters grow like actual students in a genuine school setting. Having the students graduate would be taking the main charm of the show away, at least in my opinion. Although I will say that it would be incredibly exciting to see the students that we've been following for the past 400 chapters become Pro Heroes, so I'm not entirely against this option either.

The hero society crumbles and heroes cease to exist, thereby disbanding UA and class 1-A. Honestly I'm only including this because it's a popular fan-theory, although I don't agree with it at all. It feels like a slap in the face to every student who faught in the war. It would genuinely be such a big disservice to have all of them who risked their lives fighting in the war, only for their dreams to be ripped from them. Another issue is that in my opinion, the heroes themselves isn't even the biggest flaw within the hero society. I feel like the biggest flaw with the whole system is how the general public views heroes. They see Pro Heroes as saints and pillars who can shoulder all of society's burdens and blames. Removing the job of Pro Heroes would just feel like putting a band-aid on an amputated limb, as the core issue of bnha's society shifting its blame onto others wouldn't be resolved. It would also just be scummy to title your series "My Hero Academia" only to remove the concept of heroes by the end of it. I'm not bashing Horikoshi's writing or even fans who support this theory, I just personally think that it's not a very plausible ending for bnha.

Again, I feel like option 1, where class 1-A continue to school as normal (followed by a time-skip when they become Pro Heroes) would be the best and most plausible option. However, I don't think it would be right for things to completely return to normal either.

I really hope that Horikoshi adds an arc after the current one that explores the aftermath of everything, including the public reaction to how hard the heroes faught against the villains and their unwavering spirit, which could also serve as a proper end to the overarching story of the broken hero society.

This is more of a tangent than anything else, but I CAN'T BELIEVE SHIGARAKI JUST DIED LIKE THAT??? I guess it makes me overly optimistic, but I genuinely thought at one point that Midoriya could save Tenko from All For One because it would be an incredibly fitting end for him. Tenko's main motivation behind becoming Shigaraki was the fact that not one person helped him when he was wandering the streets as a traumatised kid, and a common narrative that all of the League of Villains shared was how their fates could have been different had someone reached out a helping hand when they needed it most. Having Midoriya save Tenko from All For One would be such a satisfying ending, not only for the overarching story of the villains, but for those who wish that the villains could be redeemed. It would be such a perfect ending AND IT WAS TAKEN AWAY JUST LIKE THAT?? I don't buy it tbh maybe I'm just delusional but I have a feeling that the whole ordeal with Shigaraki isn't finished yet.

Lastly, IS MIDORIYA QUIRKLESS AGAIN?? Since Shigaraki had One For All when he died, that would mean that the quirk is also gone, right? So would that mean that he would no longer be able to become a hero? I could see this going one of two ways:

Shigaraki's not actually dead or One For All didn't disappear when he died, meaning that Midoriya can continue using it.

One For All really is gone and Midoriya is quirkless again, but he continues striving towards his goal of being a hero despite not having a quirk.

I think both options have potential and I wouldn't be opposed if either option becomes canon. Although, if Shigaraki gets revived for some bullshit reason, I might just riot. I know I literally just said that I'm not against Shigaraki not actually being dead, but that would require a plausible explanation for why he's dead but not actually dead. I think the most plausible explanation right now would be if somehow Shigaraki's quirk mutates and the "restore" part of it returns, which could "restore" his body again. But even that is a little...eh to me. Either way, I'm excited for what's in store.

You thought I was done, well SIKE! Let's talk about Midoriya's dad! Horikoshi has confirmed in 2018 that his identity will be revealed at some point, but it's nearing the end of the final war arc and still not one hint has dropped about Hisashi Midoriya. I feel like this could end up being another "Aoyama is the traitor" situation, where we think that Horikoshi has forgotten about this plot line, only for him to come back to it in full force that makes total sense in retrospect.

The most popular theory right now is that Hisashi Midoriya is actually All For One, and I actually kind of agree with it. I don't think that this is 100% going to be what Horikoshi goes with, but I think it's a pretty interesting idea that also has decent plausibility. Apart from the evidence that other fans have accumulated, there's also a lot of merit in the storytelling that could stem from this reveal:

It has already been established that the public is willing to turn their backs on heroes, no matter how much they sacrifice to ensure the safety of the civillians, if they believe that the hero is "immoral" in some way. The reveal that All For One is Midoriya's dad would be like the "Dabi is Touya" reveal except 10 times worse because this isn't just some villain, it's literally All For One. The public would not take it well, and that could be a great segue to directly addressing all of the issues about the hero society that Horikoshi has been building up.

This also completes the foil contrast between Midoriya and Shigaraki; two kids who were victims of the broken hero society, one born from a villain and one born from a hero, who become the opposite as they're taken under the wing of the greatest hero and the greatest villain. There's just something so poetic about that that I love.

Let's say that Tenko Shimura does get saved by Midoriya, imagine how he'd feel when he finds out that the person who saved him is directly related to the person who caused all of his pain and grief. It would probably break him, and this could lead to such an interesting arc of Tenko re-adjusting to a normal civilian life, dealing with the backlash that's bound to happen, and learning how to trust Midoriya again. It's such a compelling idea that I'm itching to write a fic about it.

But apart from that, there's also the fact that there aren't many other ways that would make the reveal interesting enough to justify it being such a long mystery. Think about it, there's probably a good reason that Horikoshi kept Midoriya's dad a secret for so long, and it would be lame as hell if he just turned out to be some guy. Having All For One be Midoriya's dad seems like one of the few ways for the reveal to be compelling. I could also see Midoriya being related to the Todorokis in some way, but then it would just feel like the "Dabi is Touya" reveal with extra steps.

And with that, I'm finally done with this ridiculously long post. Again, depsite my grievances, I'm super hyped to see what's to come with the series, and I'm genuinely so excited for chapter 424 to come out.

[grand-theft-carbohydrates]

replying to @caozihuanismyson

"If that was love, Cao Pi didn’t need it. Didn’t want it. It was better to be indispensable than cherished. He needed to become something that could not be left behind. Something that Father could not live without." my jaw just fucking dropped #i love this. im in love. holy shit#HE NEEDED TO BECOME SOMETHING THAT COULD NOT BE LEFT BEHIND SOMETHING THAT FATHER COULD NOT LIVE WITHOUT#(im screaming louder so people in the back can hear)#(jk there's no one in the back cuz it's san guo on tumblr.com but still)#💀#thank u op i have ascended#also all the little details of ang trying to make up for father's absence for his lil bros..... when pi wiped his tears my heart broke#that part where cao pi imagined ang's last moments? holy shit i've never thought of it that way it's genius and horrifying#(ok i need a moment)#also............... i'm going insane about the part with fish and jade#and cao pi describing cao cao's expression of love towards cao ang as painful#and wanting to put him in his mouth like how soldiers keep their precious things safe#i thought this was going to be about ang's tragedy .... but it turned out to be about that and the horror of pi's existence#thank u for the meal op i'm so grateful

thank you so much, this is such a nice comment to wake up to!!!! it makes me so happy to have such dedicated readers who catch every single detail ;u;

Cao Ang has been my blorbo for a long time because he is a fascinating contradiction. he achieved nothing and did nothing of note, but seems to have left a significant impression on those around him. Cao Cao expresses regret for him on his deathbed. Cao Pi talks about how he should have been the rightful heir. Lady Ding was willing to disobey the most powerful man in the empire in order to get the smallest measure of justice for him. His death always struck me as, well, a feel-good narrative told by a guilty conscience. Cao Cao could have ordered any one of his bodyguards to give up his horse, but he didn't. It makes sense in the coldest, most logical way. Why lose an able-bodied fighter for a brat? You can always make more. I came up with a bunch of scenarios of what "really" happened, but in the end i realised it doesn't matter. Cao Cao still left his son to die. the horror comes from the ambiguity itself. I also wanted to explore how his actions would impact the remainder of his children. They realised overnight that they were all disposable and no one was safe. the real tragedy doesn't come from Cao Ang's death, but his father undoing all his hard work. Ang tried his best to give them love, curb their worst impulses, and foster good relationships between them, only for his father to stick them in the Sibling Royale. Climb to the top and uproot all your competition. ect. ect.

But I am an optimistic person and I believe true love can pierce the veil and save the day and all that. Cao Ang's ghost continues to haunt the narrative and in the end, he manages to effect his brothers in some way. Cao Pi comes to realise that, hey, this kinda sucks, actually. i think we're emotionally stunted and perpetuating the cycle of violence. maybe i don't have to trample all my brothers to preserve my own life. maybe i shouldn't become exactly like father. hmm much to think about. Cultural Context, for those interested:

funerary practices are not historical, but based on the modern shangdong ones i've experienced.

"putting your child in your mouth" is an expression of helpless tenderness. the full phrase is "i want to you hold in my hands, but i'm afraid of dropping you. i want to hold you in my mouth, but i'm afraid you will melt." i wanted to show this conflict within cao cao, the warlord vs the man. how his ambition corrupts him. ultimately, cao cao does not put his son in his mouth to protect him. he consumes him instead.

the opening scene is based on Cao Pi's poem "Traveling on the city wall." His poems are notable for being very emo, he talks about feeling isolated and unfulfilled despite having every worldly possession. I decided to connect it with Cao Zhi's (ahistorical) bean poem. the metaphor is less profound, but what can you do? he is the lesser poet after all ;))) .

[latelyanobsession]

No Rainchecks

credit

summary Billy called and canceled on you. You should know better than to get involved but there’s just something about the way he sounded on the phone ... so here you are like a moron, out past curfew looking for the man that ditched you. 

warnings cursing, soft mushiness, fluff, smartassery

word count 1,569

note basically a what if scenario that i couldn’t resist.

As always feedback is much appreciated. Thank you for reading!

“What do you mean raincheck?” 

The other end of the line was silent for a good while. A deep sigh.

“It’s my sister... She snuck out n’ I gotta find her.”

“I’ll just come with you then...”

“No. Don’t.” 

“Billy is everything ok?”

A sharp breath. Another pause. 

“Yah. S’all fine. I’ll just catch you next time...” 

That sounded like bullshit.

“Ok. I’m sorry things didn’t work out tonight.”

Why were you apologizing? You should be pissed.

“Yah me too. Bye Y/n.”

“Bye Billy.”

You held the line, not hanging up until you heard the distinct click and the dial tone return to your ear.

You stood there a long while, staring at the wall in thought. You couldn’t put a finger on it, but you felt worried.

Maybe you were worried about Max. But something told you that you needed to be worried about Billy as well tonight.

“Ma, I’m heading out on my date!” You yelled up the hallway towards your parent’s bedroom.

“Be home by ten!” was the reply.

Grabbing your keys by the front door you slid into your denim jacket, and gave yourself a quick once over in the mirror. You weren’t going to see him tonight but you had put a lot of care into your look. You had selected a sleek black, off-shoulder top and paired it with your slimmest jeans. Your jewelry was simple and you kept your neck bare to draw greater attention to your chest and shoulders. 

None of it would matter now, but you at least wanted to help him find Max.

Starting your car, you turned on your headlights and began to think. You had lived in Hawkins since you were five years old. Pretty much forever. You knew a lot of the odd hang outs and woodsy holes in the wall that the kids in town would go to. So it surprised you even more that Billy had turned down your help.

He had complained to you recently about Max hanging out with Lucas Sinclair and you knew that wherever Lucas was Mike Wheeler and Will Byers would be. It was a small town and you had grown up with their older siblings, Nancy Wheeler and Johnathan Byers, attending various church potlucks, boy scout award ceremonies, and neighborhood birthdays to know where everyone lived. It would probably be best to check in at the Wheeler’s house first. 

You arrived at the Wheeler house twenty minutes later. The lights were still on. You rang the doorbell a couple of times and waited patiently. Mrs. Wheeler opened the door in a set of cotton pajamas. 

“Ah! Y/N! What a pleasant surprise! It’s rather late, did Nancy invite you over?”

You smiled graciously, knowing you looked out of place. You and Nancy had not been proper friends since middle school, gravitating towards other social circles. But Mrs. Wheeler was ignorantly optimistic that everyone was friends with Nancy.

“Evenin’ Mrs. Wheeler, no not tonight. I actually have an odd favor to ask.”

She raised an eyebrow in curiosity.

Clasping your hands behind your back you took a breath and plowed ahead.

“I’m helping a friend look for his sister tonight... I know she tends to hang out with Lucas and the gang so I thought I’d stop here first to see if I’d get lucky.... her name’s Max.”

Mrs. Wheeler’s eyes lit up.

“Oh. You know what... her brother was just here not too long ago...”

Your ears perked up.

“Really? Did Billy find her?” You were immensely hopeful.

Mrs. Wheeler smiled, placing a manicured finger to her cheek.

“No, he was still looking for her. But I gave him the address to the Byers’.... Mike and the rest of the kids were headed over there earlier this evening.”

You nodded. 

“Such a nice boy, Billy....” she said aloud. 

The expression on her face glazing over.

You furrowed your brow. “Mrs. Wheeler?”

It took her a moment. “Yes?”

“The Byers’ still live off Route 3, yeah?”

She nodded, readjusting her pajama top.

“Ok. I’ll head that way. Thanks for the info! Sorry for disturbing your evening!”

She gave you a friendly send off as you hopped back into your car, driving away from Maple Street.

The Byers lived on the county line, a fair ways out of town. A half hour had past before you were slowly making your way down the blind driveway, being mindful of that large oak tree at the edge of their property.

Pulling up to the house you got out of the car. About to walk up, your foot got caught in something.

Looking down you frowned at the brown leather bomber jacket caught on the toe of your boot.

Billy’s jacket?

But no camaro.

Where was Billy?

Picking up the jacket, you entered the house only to quickly drop it again on the floor beside you.

You found him. Out cold on the living room floor. 

The place was a mess. It looked like a tornado had blown through.

And there was blood smeared and spattered all around him.

“Billy what the hell’ve you gotten yourself into?” you shrugged your jacket off onto the floor and walked over to him.

Dropping to your knees your surveyed the damage. He wasn’t as bad off as you would have thought considering how much blood was on the floor.

A bloody nose. A bruised cheek. His knuckles spoke for themselves. 

“Billy? Billy can you hear me?” you gave his shoulder a gentle nudge.

Nothing. No response.

Surely the other guy had to look much worse than he did. So why was Billy laid out flat? 

You said his name again. Louder. Trying to roust him a little harder. Still nothing.

Something skidded across the floor.

A syringe.

Your eyes washed over it in fear and then looking around the room you saw the vial on the end table. 

Drugged. He was drugged.

Your hand instinctively flew to his neck, checking his pulse. You brought your face down to his mouth, letting out a small shaky sigh.

He was breathing. His heart beating slow and steady.

The only thing you could do was wait.

You kicked the syringe away and pulled the throw pillows off the couch. 

Carefully, you lifted Billy’s head and placed them underneath him. Making sure he was ok, you looked around. Maybe you should clean up a little while you waited? After all you didn’t want the Byers’ thinking a crime had occurred in their home.

Entering the kitchen you found more aftermath. Broken glasses and plates. The table was ransacked, and the sideboard disheveled. You stretched, taking it all in. Where to even start?

You found a broom and dust pan in the pantry and cleaned up the pieces of broken china first. Next you tried to rehome the tumbled items strewn around the floor. Is this where the canister of tea bags had been? Joyce’s recipe tin, had it been on the table or by the stove? It was anybody’s guess. You were trying your best. You pulled out the clorox spray and tried to remove any drops of blood as you went along.

The kitchen looked relatively better than it had, so you decided to move back to the living room to clean up the mess in there. As well as to see what you could do about the KO’ed one on the floor.

Filling a mixing bowl with warm water and grabbing a dish cloth you sat down on the floor next to Billy.

Dipping the cloth into the bowl you wrung it out and gently began dabbing his face. Wiping the blood from his nose.

He stirred. His brow wrinkling as his eyes peered open.

“Kelly Preston?” he garbled, groggily reaching for the loose barrel curls toppling across your shoulder.

Taking in a deep breath, you smiled. 

“Very. Funny.”

You rinsed the cloth and pulled his hand from your silken locks.

He hissed as you blotted his knuckles, becoming more alert.

He quietly watched as you continued, pulling his other hand into your lap.

“Why’re you here?” he asked after a time.

“I said I needa-”

“Raincheck?” you cut him short.

Putting the cloth down you placed your hands on his.

“Well I couldn’t well let you get your ass whooped, ditch me, and lose track of Max all in one night now could I?” You cracked a sly smile.

He let out a strained laugh, propping himself up on his elbows.

Offering him a hand which he ignored, Billy unsteadily rose to his feet. He leaned on you heavily, yoking an arm around your shoulder.

“You look sexy. Was this all for me?” He traced a finger from your left shoulder, and across your collarbone to stroke the hollow of your neck.

You shivered lightly, meeting his gaze.

“Well I was... but I think Max would appreciate my efforts more.” you chided.

Heading to the door you picked up both your jackets.

“Oh... by the way. We’re taking my ride.”

Billy’s eyebrows furrowed in deep concern.

“I think Max took the camaro...”

Billy thrust his hand into your jacket pocket.

“Billy... Billy.”  you pleaded.

He had the keys. And ripped the front door open.

You thought he was going to abandon you but he stopped looking over his shoulder.

“You comin’ or what?” he barked.

Wrapping your arm in his you rushed into the night. 

No more rainchecks.

[cloudcountry]

Here comes the fanfic TWST ramble, and I say this threateningly 🫵 /J

But yeah!! As I’ve mentioned before, my fic plays off one of the more popular theories in the TWST fandom. This theory is that whenever the main character ‘Yuu’, dies, they then get replaced with a new Yuu. This new Yuu then has to go through the events of the game again, starting from the beginning. This loop of events repeat until a Yuu survives all of the events, overblots and all. The Reader (who I’m going to call Loop!Reader-) is the final ‘Yuu’, and they’re the one who ends the loop.

Admittedly, I wanted Loop!Reader to be clearly different from the Yuu in the game. However, I mainly used TWST’s light novel iteration (Yes, there’s an official light novel of TWST. I was shocked too) of Yuu, Yuuya Kuroki, as a base for inspiration. While Yuuya is almost painfully introverted and gives off the vibes of a soaking wet cat (sorry Yuuya- He really needs a hug-), Loop!Reader is very energetic, extroverted, flamboyant, and vibrant. She’s popular in school and has a large friend group. Her exuberance and liveliness may seem a bit overwhelming at times, but she really is a nice person! Whenever she’s in a conversation or outing, she makes sure no one feels left out and tries to involve everyone. And instead of coming from Japan like Yuu and their other iterations, Loop!Reader comes from America and is of Spanish descent.

Let me give a quick synopsis:

The story itself starts off with Loop!Reader mulling over the fact that it’s been almost a year since her best friend Rosalie’s disappearance. But she can’t dwell on it for long because she has to go play in a baseball tournament, and her team has to go against another team that they have some animosity with. Both her and her baseball team go all out, and they win, though just barely! While Loop!Reader is waiting for the rest of her team, she hears a cry, turns around just in time to see horses pulling a black carriage charging at her, and everything goes black. When she wakes up, she’s thrust into the world of Twisted Wonderland with seemingly no way home. As time goes on however, she starts getting odd dreams about her missing best friend…

Ngl, the fish facts you gave reminded me of the nicknames Floyd gives to others! In case of Loop!Reader, I’ll be honest, I’m having a bit of trouble coming up with one- So far, I was thinking he could call her either Swordfish or Sailfish, mainly because Loop!Reader is an incredibly fast runner. But neither of those sound as cute or catchy as Shrimpy in my opinion, so I’m a little bit stuck,, 

Oh, but speaking of nicknames!! One time I jokingly made Loop!Reader call Azul, ‘Azulito’ in some practice dialogue where she was teasing him, and I thought I would never use that nickname again. I was wrong. Loop!Reader calls Malleus, ‘Cuernitos,’ which means ‘little horns’ in Spanish-

I’m pretty excited to write for Loop!Reader!! Her expressive personality paired up with the wide cast of TWST is definitely going to be interesting >:] *cough* The newfound Azul lover genes in me are vibrating and are already trying to think of scenarios with him and Loop!Reader 🧍‍♂️ 

And for the fun of it, I made a quick list of ship dynamics with Loop!Reader and some of the TWST characters-:

Azul and Loop!Reader —> Conniving Bastard (/aff) x Popular Drama Queen

Riddle and Loop!Reader —> No-nonsense x Free Spirit

Floyd and Loop!Reader —> >:] x ;)

Ace and Loop!Reader —> “Only I can make fun of them!” (Goes both ways-)

Malleus and Loop!Reader —> Loves listening x Talks all the time

Jamil and Loop!Reader —> Over it™ x Drama Queen

Idia and Loop!Reader —> Pessimist x Optimist

And also for the heck of it,,, have some random snippets I wrote randomly trying to get a feel on how to write Loop!Reader’s character—

~~~

(Name) wanted to bury her head in her hands and scream. Why were all the boys she’s met by now in Night Raven College so stupidly attractive, and why couldn’t the boys at her own school be like them?

~~~

“So someone showed up today, and they were pretty, uh...” (Name) trailed off, but the way she smiled and tucked her hair behind her ear gave Grim the message. 

He stuck out his tongue in disgust. “Henchman, get it together!”

~~~

(Some context: This is the aftermath of Loop!Reader bumping into Malleus for the first time-)

“Grim,” (Name) hissed, gently trying to shake the grey creature awake. “Grim, get up!”

“No, my tuna-- Bwah? Huh?” Grim blinked groggily. “Henchman? What’s happening?”

“Grim, you will not believe what just happened.” (Name) kept her voice low, but her eyes were wide with anticipation.

“What?” Grim said, still groggy from sleep. He rubbed his eyes.

“I just met the most beautiful man in the world two minutes ago. Like, for real.”

Grim stared at her with tired eyes, clearly unimpressed. “You woke me up for this? I was dreaming about mountains of tuna… And anyway, didn’t you say the same thing about those other two guys?”

“Okay, the other OTHER most beautiful man,” (Name) cut herself with a sharp shake of her head. “But that’s beside the point! I just went out for a quick walk outside and I bump into the most gorgeous man I’ve EVER seen. Great hair, amazing eyes, handsome face. I didn’t catch his name though, he didn’t want to tell me.”

“Huh,” Grim looked at her with squinted eyes. “What was he doing all the way out here?”

(Name) shrugged. “Something about abandoned ruins? I think he was taking a look around here.” The girl’s eyes widened when a thought struck her. “So he’s gorgeous…” She whispered conspiratorially, a small smile dusting her lips. “And kind of a nerd. One of the best combinations.”

“Uh-huh, sure…” Grim nestled back onto his spot on the bed, trying to go back to sleep. “You owe me some extra tuna for waking me up, henchman.”

“Hey!”

~~~

All in all, I’m pretty excited to write it!! Loop!Reader is fun to write, and I like making her interact with other characters >:D

Jackdaw Anon 🐦

WAIT YEA I KNOW THAT THEORY!!!!!! THATS S O COOL?? I LOVE THAT CONCEPT SO MUCH...IT HAS THE POTENTIAL TO BE SUPER ANGSTY aaaaaaaaaaaAAAAAAAAA!!! also i love the contrast between them omg jhasfdhgasfd

dont worry about the name not being catchy!!! honestly ive gotten into the habit of assigning fish and rocks to peoples ocs and even people themselves sometimes (like how i call my mutuals angelfish, piranha, sea walnut, etc!!) so juts have fun with it!!!! :D

THOS ENICKNAMES ARE SUPER CUTE TOO I LOVE THEM :(((

[catofadifferentcolor]

Terrible Fic Ideas #5: The White Princess, but make it GoT

I have a terrible weakness for female!Jon Snow fics - mostly because making the character female gives a fascinating array of opportunities to unite two rival claims to the Iron Throne and all the drama that involves. So what about a fic where the people with the strongest claim to the throne - female!Jon Snow and Robert Baratheon - end up married?

Hear me out:

Much as Elizabeth of York objectively had a better claim to the throne than her husband, Henry VII, a female!Jon Snow (called Joanna from here on out) would have the Targaryen bloodline claim but no chance of getting on the throne herself even if she wasn't presented to the world as her uncle's bastard. Westeros doesn't abide female rulers.

But if you marry her bloodline claim to the man with the next best claim - her second cousin once removed, Robert Baratheon, who's actually got the throne - you have the strongest of any possible claim. One which could make the greatest number of factions happy, if only they knew about it.

But how to make it happen? It's easy to imagine Robert trying to take Joanna to bed, as she resembles her mother a great deal, but how to make it a legal union? I see two options:

One: In the aftermath of the Greyjoy Rebellion, Robert heads north, sees 14 year old Joanna looking the image of his lost love, and pulls out some ancient Targaryen law that lets the king have two wives. No one is particularly thrilled with this idea except for Robert, but he's the king and the most optimistic hope it will turn down his whoring. Or,

Two: In the aftermath of the Greyjoy Rebellion, Robert heads north after Cersei has been found in the act of adultery while he was at war, and seeing Joanna the image of his lost love demands they marry on the spot. No one's particularly happy with this scenario either, but at least it's not bigamy.

Either way, Joanna ends up in Kings Landing as a/the Queen and because Robert is his usual lusty self, winds up with a son in short order. If it Cersei's still in the picture, there's a lot of politicking and worry for her life and that of her child. If Cersei's gone, there's still politicking but with whatever Lannisters remain upset her child is replacing their prince, who they claim is legitimate still.

Sometime while she's still a relatively young bride of 16 or 17, while she's about halfway through her second pregnancy, Robert dies like in the book, and Joanna ends up the regent to her young son, the new king. There's a regency council of course, but she has more power than one might think at first glance.

The truth of her ancestry is never really announced so much as quietly discovered by multiple parties in multiple ways, who quietly go along with it because it suits their needs/politics/etc. Eventually the various parties wonder why everyone else is going along with it too, and after some poking it just sort of... comes out. It doesn't change anything, because inheritance puts her son's claim before her own, but it helps the last of her detractors.

As a side plot, Prince Oberyn comes to Kings Landing to swear Dorne's allegiance to the new king on his brother's behalf and strikes up a flirtation with Joanna. At first that's all it is, especially as she's just about to birth her second child, but they end up forming an odd friendship. Joanna likes Dorne and how they treat their bastards, and Dorne likes her because they think her mother was one of theirs. After 2 or 3 years of this, they marry. It's part political - draws in Dorne, helps make up for Elia's murder, and gives Joanna and her son a loyal defender - and part a love match - they get along and Joanna begrudges Oberyn his paramours no more than she'd begrudged Robert.

That's all I really have, but the idea tickles me. So feel free to borrow it, just link me if you ever do anything with it.

Other Jon Snow Headcanons: Aegon the Unyielding | Aemon the Adventurous | Lady Arryn | Lady Baratheon | Lady Lannister | Lady Stark | Prince Consort | Prince of Summerhall | Queen Mother

More Terrible Fic Ideas

[true-blue-sonic]

C G H

C: What character do you identify with most?

Silver! To the point where I actively have to try and not project too much on him, haha. But I adore his optimistic spirit and willingness to help others, plus the fact he is very quick to action which can backfire on him. That makes him very relatable to me: he has his flaws and short-sighted-ness, but in the end he means well and is a hero through and through. As for me personally, I can find myself in the fact that he does not always think things through, and also the fact he likes helping others.

G: Do you write your story from start to finish, or do you write the scenes out of order?

Both! So generally I get a few ideas for a fic; just random, unattached scenes that take place during widely different setting and scenarios. I write these down in the way I envision them taking place over time within the fic, and then I write a whole story around those scenes. In that scenario I do try to write the story in a chronological order, but fact is it needs a lot of editing and rewriting when that is finished. The first handful of scenes tend to not fit very well into the story as it has become, basically! But I think that overall, my writing can be summed up best as Somewhat Chaotic😂

H: How would you describe your style?

Hmm, I find this question rather difficult. I think idealistic? The characters in my fics definitely face hardships, but there is a kind world and helpful people that surround them. As for actual writing style, long and flowy seems to cover it best; I 100% struggle with writing a sentence that does not have at least once comma😅

[just-honey-dewd]

Discussing Ship Dynamics and the outcome of Marichat in this episode (Elation spoilers)

So after watching Elation, I’m just wondering is next episode gonna be the episode where it’s Adrinette but no one interferes or forces them into some enclosed space to achieve nothing? Cuz legit Ladynoir has had compelling (if not drawn out) development between their boundaries and understanding of each other, and Marichat just got blown so far outta the best gal pals idealised dynamic I wanted in my dreams into such angst that deserves its own rant — so we’re basically being cornered into Adrinette since Adrien has always been more resolute in his feelings, and Ladynoir’s exchange during Elation feels like the understandable place to extinguish any pursuement of romance between this combination of aliases.

I think a significant thing to note is that these two don’t come off of this interaction on the same page. Marinette seems to have resigned herself to the perceived loss of any way to be with Chat Noir: since he confirms that he only has eyes for Marinette, but he knows the power dynamic is unbalanced so he can’t pursue a romance with her as CN (he tries to imply to her that there could be hope if they met as civilians, but he fails to communicate it to her). Marinette at this point is at her wit’s end, and manages to hold out in saying goodbye to CN, before crumpling once he’s finally out of earshot. Because yeah, she legit doesn’t want to perceive Adrien as an option because she believed it was her love specifically for Adrien that made her so incompetent — but this episode leads her to the conclusion that any love she harbours will lead her and-or others to ruin.

It’s not really blatantly stated in this episode, but Marinette has a long running habit of perceiving the worst case scenarios, and sometimes blowing things out of proportion — but she directly experiences almost being akumatized because she pursued her own happiness in her love for CN. She’s traumatised as all hell: 1) CN can’t know she’s LB because… Chat Blanc: 2) She can’t entertain being with Adrien because she thinks her love for him indirectly made her lose her rational judgement (even though anyone coulda mistaken Felix for Adrien honestly, and she was in a time crunch): 3) NOW she can’t even perceive being with CN because she was emotionally vulnerable enough to get akumatized. So to her, she’s basically out of options. Love makes her vulnerable, and pursuing romance is out of the question. She was able to stay strong when she was standing as LB during the fight, and saying her goodbyes to CN as Marinette. She seems to have gotten way better at compartimentilizing her feelings. But yeah, she’s brought to tears the last scene we see her.

Adrien has more hope because he is quite an optimist at heart — which is why he frequently finds himself disappointed when he lets himself believe in the good will of his father. In this episode many things have been conveyed to him in a short span of time. 1) Marinette “still” likes him as CN (who he’s long since perceived as his “true” self): 2) Marinette insists she likes him beyond the mask (even though he can’t truly understand the weight of that statement coming from her): 3) Marinette has long since loved him as Adrien (and hopefully it clicks in his head that this was the secret boy she was heartaching over in Glaciator 2.0).

There’s a lot of eye-opening things going on for him. And CN has truly resolved his feelings for LB so he really only wants to consider being with Marinette. Marinette helped him speak out against his father, has supported him in his civilian and sometimes even hero life, and has shown time and time again to want nothing more than for him to be happy. And she’s the only person (aside from Plagg) that got him comfortable enough to confide to her.

What happened between them in this episode cemented it to him that if he ever wanted to pursue her, he’s gotta do it as Adrien. Plagg gave him enough hope for him to fall back into “Oh of course! She loved me as Adrien before, it’s not hopeless!” She’s never properly resolved her feelings with Adrien, she’s only been avoiding them.

So what this all conveys is that next episode… really better not pull the bs of having other characters force them together with Marinette clawing at the walls. I kinda miss what happened in Gamer all the way back. Just let them vibe. Or idk, do whatever it is they might be doing together in the next episode.

I’m surprised I had this much to say about ML, but I appreciate it if you read through all this. Have a good one!

[redux-iterum]

Lynx Continues to Read Survivors and Regrets it Greatly

This one’s gonna be short since this book didn’t have a lot going for it. Obligatory reminder to read my takes on The Empty City and A Hidden Enemy before reading this for something resembling context.

Alpha’s decisions are so all over the place and I have no idea if he’s brilliantly manipulative, erratically fearful, or if he’s puppetted by the authors to do whatever’s convenient for the plot. Considering these are the Erins, I’m thinking it’s the last. 

The Pack is for sure a cult. Towards the end, Lucky criticizes that the Pack did nothing to stop the dobermans from taking the puppies, and Sweet idiotically says he’s “turning on the Pack”. I’d yap on about how stupid this exchange is, but I won’t, since it’s fairly self-evident how stupid this all is.

I’ve noticed this crow following Lucky around. Crows and wolves often scavenge together (and crows have been observed to play with wolf pups), and I can imagine an odd scenario where Lucky has befriended a crow to be his companion. Perhaps this crow would give us insight into crow culture. Mayhaps Lucky, a distant cousin of the wolf, is someone the crows might think to talk to. Alpha, being mothered by a wolf, might display odd attitudes towards crows by disallowing Lucky from talking with his crow in the same way Woundwort discouraged Bigwig from speaking with Keehar in Watership Down.

Lick and Grunt are here. Grunt’s “being born evil” thing is weird and where did he get the notion that dobermans are the best? He witnessed his oh-so-great leader murder her own puppy and then murder his mother, and then later murder his brother, yet he still allies himself with her! If it were me, I’d write him that the negative stereotypes of the Wild Pack get to him and he has a defeatist mentality about his bloodline. “If you all see me as a brutish monster, I’ll be a brutish monster.” Lick would be more optimistic about herself and surround herself with the dogs who support her like Martha and Daisy.

Even then, I’m not sure how one would fix the doberman pack. Dobermans are supposedly very intelligent, much more intelligent than they’re often portrayed (I also watched a kids’ TV show with animal characters where one of the antagonists was a doberman and he too was stupid). I know what Blade’s motivations are—they haven’t been revealed yet—but I don’t know how one would amend her newfound intelligence with her whole thing.

Now that the cast is growing, characters are now fighting for importance. Bella barely got any time to shine in this book, the original patrol dogs have lost their relevance, and everyone who isn’t Alpha, Sweet, or Lucky has been going through a revolving door of being in the spotlight. Lick becoming an important character won’t help matters.

Really bad book overall. It called helicopters “loudbirds” when they resemble dragonflies more.

[funkymbtifiction]

Can intuitives that are E6 be more optimistic and naive than other sixes? Being an N means that you have this sort of idealism in you, this hope for a better world or a better future, this optimism that things are going to be fine in the end. So, can an N who is also a 6 oscillate between this optimistic, idealized, naive way of thinking and a more down to Earth, overthinking, pessimistic view upon society and future in general?

Optimistic and idealistic, yes... but not necessarily naive. Naive means a lack of wisdom and that's more of an individual trait than a collective one for a particular type. Wisdom grows with experience for the person willing to learn from their mistakes. Intuitives can do this as 6s if they learn to think productively (what has this taught me, and what will it change for my behavior in the future); they are not doomed to forever be "had" because they are idealistic.

For me, being an intuitive 6w7 is like having a split personality. One of them is grumpy and fearful and suspicious and keeps people at an arm's length as specimens to view with skepticism and distrust; the other is a happy, cheerful "it will all turn out okay" person. But for me, I would say the balance is on realism more than fantastical thinking, because I do have Te in the mix. As an ENFP, I often hope for the best but reserve any kind of judgment out of a desire to "wait and see," unlike the judging 6s I have interacted with online and in person. I am comfortable with a certain amount of uncertainty and okay with allowing things to play out when I can't predict the end -- and unfortunately in some cases, being an intuitive, I am rather good at guessing where something is going (negatively). The struggle is between deciding if this is actual Intuition (an unemotional reading of the situation and predicting what will happen as a result of it) or fearful projection (6 coming up with worst-case scenarios). Which one it is often comes down to whether the facts fit my assumption or not.

For example, a friend's husband is in the hospital right now with a serious infection. Another 6 immediately leapt to the conclusion that he's going to die; I pointed out that he has survived against all odds before, there's no reason to think that THIS TIME his body is going to quit on him in his battle with cancer over the last six years. The facts support this conclusion and indeed, he has started to improve. But in the process of scanning him, they found a growth in his brain similar to the one that killed someone I know two months ago. And this is a case where I know he won't be here long. In the short term, he will be fine; but it's more than likely that he will fade in the next few months. Do I want to be optimistic about it? I do. I chose to be optimistic about his brief hospital stay because I felt supported in it by his survival against odds that would have killed someone else, thus far. But as a 6, I'm also rational and practical when I know what's coming.

As a 6w7, it's like I live my life as a fearful person who is staring into the darkness, but a large part of me wants to avoid those fears through ignoring them and choosing to see the bright side. I am never so 7ny that I am no longer a 6. I feel like a rubber ball bouncing between extremes. But I would say that all 6w7s are like this; you don't have to be an Intuitive to want a better future/life. It's just that intuition + 6 can cause you to worry about different things, and the temptation is always there to abstract away from a fearful situation and start speaking in generalized terms rather than specific ones.

I caught myself doing that this morning -- someone brought up a specific incident to me to talk about and my brain kept floating out and generalizing it as a way to tiptoe around it, cuz I don't exactly know what to say about it. What do I mean? Something like this: "My dog is dying." "Oh, it is so hard to lose a pet, they are so much a part of us, and yet we keep choosing the pain of loss for the temporary pleasure they bring us." It should be, "Oh, I am so sorry. I know how much Max means to you."

[sixty-silver-wishes]

If I could pick your brain for a bit, i was wondering if you had any cabinet of dr caligari theories on why alan doesn't seem to have a "real life" counterpart in the framing device/how he actually died or if he was even real at all. I have my own pet theories, but i love the way you disect and analyze the movie so i wanted to ask ^-^

I’ve thought about this a lot, and there are a ton of theories and interpretations I’ve heard, but to me, Alan represents lost innocence. He may have been based off a counterpart or just a construction of Francis’ imagination, but looking at this from both a postwar perspective and a psychological perspective, I feel this is the interpretation I like best.

Before WWI, many soldiers had never actually seen war, and so eagerly enlisted, only to be faced with a level of violence and brutality on a scale so wide that WWI was deemed “the war to end all wars”- of course, until WWII. Alan, similarly, is eager to go to the fair, where his fate will be decided. We don’t see very much of him, but from what we do see, he’s energetic, optimistic, and in love (and whether that’s with Jane, Francis, or both is up to interpretation!). When he asks Cesare how long he has to live, he does this with enthusiasm. Again, I’ve seen multiple interpretations of why this is the case, but from this angle, I think it lines up with the concept of young soldiers in WWI, eagerly marching to their deaths. (My friend has an interesting theory that Alan was a trench buddy whose death Francis felt responsible for, and I’ve also seen theories that Francis is queer, and Alan is his ideal man. I like both of these theories, and there’s a lot of angles you can go with here.)

From a different, more abstract perspective, I think Alan can represent Francis’ lost innocence. It’s never explained why Francis is in the asylum (Hans Janowitz, one of the screenwriters, didn’t even want the asylum scene added in, but it was added to soften the film’s anti-authority themes. Nonetheless, I think the asylum scene can also support an anti-authority reading, but that’s another post.) but due to a number of shared elements- for example, “Caligari” being the asylum director in both scenarios- I personally believe that Francis had some sort of traumatic experience and couldn’t process it properly, and projects his own experiences onto the people around him in order to cope. In Francis’ head, he gets to be the hero, the brave investigator to make sense of a chaotic, nonsensical world.

And yet, he still can’t save Alan. If anything, Alan has to die, or else the rest of the plot can’t happen.

Perhaps Alan represents Francis’ own mind before a traumatic event. Again, he is bubbly and carefree, before being suddenly cut down. We can also recontextualize him asking how long he has to live in this way, perhaps with his death representing the moment Francis’ innocence (and possibly sanity) was shattered. While this isn’t always the case, traumatic events can be flashbulb memories, where people remember the exact date and time they took place. With this in mind, “tomorrow’s dawn” may symbolize the moment of the event, in which Francis’ innocence is destroyed. He spends the rest of the film trying to solve Alan’s murder, maybe to give himself some catharsis- if he cannot save his own innocence, at least in his head, he can avenge it.

Also, this is strictly headcanon territory, but I hc Alan as a poet. This not only provides some contrast to Francis’ logical, at times aggressive, personality, but from a postwar perspective, adds a layer of symbolism in terms of WWI being the death of the Romantic movement. The fact that he’s killed by Cesare, whose costuming and movements suggest Expressionist art, can also symbolize the violence of WWI giving rise to Expressionism, which pushes human emotions to the extreme in a stylized, unnatural way as a response to the war, and the end of Romanticism, which celebrates the beauty of the natural world and human emotion.