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#but worse was my parents reaction
iftitah · 8 months
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i was home on diwali and i wouldn't able to go back till holi what a fucking life 🤣🤣🤣
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tanglepelt · 1 year
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Dc x dp idea 69
Danny is known to the league. Not his civilian identity but they know him as phantom. He was smart enough not to call himself Danny phantom for this.
Amity set off a lot of alarm bells for the JLD. Who have been led to believe it’s just a hot spot for natural portals due to the thin layer. Totally not because of a stable portal into the realm. Controlled by two adults who like to fish inside it. That’s just silly. Who in their right minds would even try to tear a whole between the dimensions.
Danny has a way to contact them if he needs help but never has. The league is unsure what to think of him. He often shows up to help but is only sociable with the teen hero’s. John said they couldn’t accurately gauge the age of a member of the infinite realm.
There really wasn’t any reason to assume he had two identities given he reads as a member of the realm. The bats likely still did there due diligence. With amorpho and duplicates it may be hard to pinpoint if he has two or one identity.
Over time the more Danny is around them he gets more talkative to the adults. Often fanboying over the alien side of the league. It’s common to see him around at least one of the groups at minimum once a month. Then it increases in how often he’s around. Nearly 1-3 times a week.
Then for a month or two radio silence. They couldn’t even find him in his supposed haunt in amity.
He makes a reappearance during a massive invasion. Refuses to talk to anyone. Is stiff and nervous and even flinching away from some of the adults. The same is true of the teen hero’s.
He always shows up to help never staying around after. He takes a bad hit, maybe a ray that disrupts his powers. Danny is forced back into human form unconscious.
This leads to medical finding recently healed Y on his chest. Or maybe one that red and puffy stitched together. You know whatever floats someone’s boat. As well as other scars and stuff.
Ones indicating a vivisection and other experimentations.
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ayrennaranaaldmeri · 11 months
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man the dev notes w/ the stormshore tabernacle convo. whatever they're there for it's kind of remarkable how so much of the notes there for her are just textbook abuser stuff.
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oh this is . oh .
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stonergirlfilmcanon · 1 month
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so at first I had to stop going into the general show tags because it was actually triggering my C PTSD like crazy and now I think I have to stop looking at tags for even posts I like because no one can help themselves and it's genuinely detrimental to my mental health
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mihrsuri · 5 months
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I keep trying to write an update and then being embarrassed about it and feeling like I’m trauma dumping on people by updating and I just..I know it’s on me to manage my crap, I know. I am trying (not very well but I’m trying) and it’s just…I don’t know. I don’t even know.
#please know i have thought about hospital but hospital would#genuinely make it worse (like I cannot even tell you how much worse)#i think I’m legitimately just…having a trauma reaction on top#of a jewish trauma spike#and dentists and having to move (I may have cleaned till I shook today also my arm#does not look great#i feel like i don’t actually verbally have the words#(i have tried not engaging i have tried engaging they both feel awful)#(hashem i don’t know would you even embrace me would you…)#(it’s not a meds thing (I take meds for mdd and I know what that looks like and this isn’t it)#(it’s hard to explain the difference between CPTSD and like a panic attack or a depression)#(except that I feel like I’m so so tainted and not in my body or if I’m in my body I’m in my body somewhere else#abuse cw#i didn’t ask for this cptsd and no tshirt was offered#this will disappear probably#UGH#(i am seeing my therapist tomorrow i just..i know i need to reach out to)#(to like my current landlords and ask if I could just pay for a cleaning service to come in)#(i know i need to be like ‘unfortunately my CPTSD is Fucking Terrible Right Now and I need)#(just a bit of grace apologies)#(i do not want my parents to know i do not want that)#(aside from the fact that I am already a burden to them anyway)#a stupid flop of a person i am crying thinking about how i had plans for kids and a wife and travel and…I’m nothing#(everyone else is something I’m not I don’t deserve grace lbr)#it keeps running through my head how many people i thought loved me want me dead#and it’s like I can fake it so well#(i don’t know I may be like sending words to people)#to run through the steps of not being alone#i’m truly sorry i am always not taking accountability and playing the victim and clinging to people#to get reassurance i don’t deserve that its a good person it isn’t it isn’t a person
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halinski · 3 months
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.
//rant in tags
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astronomical-bagel · 11 months
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Sometimes it just hits me that I’m actively hiding every interest of mine from my parents and faking having more ‘respectable’ ones. How did they fuck up so badly that I get panic attacks when I think about them knowing I like ninja turtles. Like why would you tease and ridicule your child so much that they are scrambling to hide their innocent hobbies. And I’m mad at myself because I’m letting them get to me!! I shouldn’t care about their opinion but all I very obviously do. It’s just. Ugh. I’m horrible at keeping my own secrets, but for once I want to enjoy something without having to see my parents faces every time they see me enjoying it. I’m sick of pretending I’m just tolerating a show for the lolz. I’m sick of deleting my watch history every time I watch a silly little kids show. I’m just so tired.
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Me, opening up a packet of the stuff the vet gave me: “I hope this probiotic powder doesn’t put my cat off his food. Can’t really help with his digestion issues if he doesn’t eat it”
I spill some because my hands can have problems with stability
My cat: *licks the stuff up like a kid who just discovered what powdered sugar was*
Me: “is this flavored?”
My cat: begs me for more powder and momentarily forgets his food
Me: “this has to be flavored”
#emma posts#sometimes him getting excited about new flavors for kitties is good#but other times his love of flavor exploration will lead him to eating a food he’s allergic to#and I can’t figure out what he’s reacting to right away because he just keeps eating the thing that makes his tummy hurt#at least I stop using things I realize cause allergic reactions#you’d think a little guy who doesn’t even know what allergies are would be even more off put by them#he’s so finicky about so many random things! but he loves new foods. especially more expensive ones. and that food was more expensive#this time he is getting a food for upset hairball tummies and has been enjoying it more than his old stuff too#I just hope that him traveling back and forth between his old food at my parents house and new food here causes problems#his old man tummy is getting more sensitive than it used to be and he’s getting a different food now… hopefully. and vitamins while he gets#these probiotics to hopefully make the change easier. I don’t want to jinx it but so far it seems to be really helpful#he hasn’t even gotten one hairball since starting the hairball food! and he loves his new vitamin treats#hopefully he’ll keep doing well with the old kitty vitamin treats#I want him to get his old man vitamins#even if he’s super healthy for his age. it’s good not to get worse!#i would know. as someone who dealt with not eating enough from medication side effects#I’m better now though! I switched meds and take more vitamins just in case#anyway. eating food is important for humans and kitties if you can get it it’s important!#and if your cat doesn’t get or absorb enough food they could get permanent damage to their bodies. never let your cat go more than three#days without food! try to make sure that they eat at least every 12 hours#they might not need as much food as you. but they can get a lot sicker a lot faster than humans usually do#I can ramble on and on about cat health though 😅 I just love my little guy so much#combo of better food formulated for hairballs and not giving him an allergic reaction with the probiotics too seems to be helping a lot#i knew cheap food wasn’t usually quite as good as the slightly more expensive stuff but holy shit. since moving out and now switching food#it’s been going so well for him! maybe I should ask my family to change the other cats food. I just hope that an extra 9$ a bag isn’t#off putting for them. i feel like fewer hairballs should be a great selling point
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howtobeamagicalgirl · 4 months
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✨️
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dredshirtroberts · 4 months
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it is not slacking off to write or create it is not slacking off to do things that are fun i am not slacking off or procrastinating right now i'm allowed to do things i enjoy doing for fun including playing games and writing and such
#if i say it enough i will remember it's true#can you guess which aspect of capitalism i'm struggling with today?#it does not help my bones are somehow WORSE than yesterday even after all of the rest i took so that's Super Fun:tm:#so i've got that on in the back of my head#ugh#i... am putting off calling my grandma - i meant to do it last week but i got too in my head about it#and uno reversed myself into forgetting to do it at all until the Worst Times Possible#(generally around Normal Fuckin Meal Times)#i want to call to wish her a belated mother's day and check in re: grandpa but also...#also i don't want to have to do a phone call i don't want to talk to them about anything at all#they stress me out to talk to and it makes me super uncomfortable to be on the phone in general let alone with a Heavy Topic over our heads#like.... i'm comfortable with where i'm at acceptance-wise with Grandpa's whole situation#and i know i am late for a better relationship with the pair of them in general#like i'm not going to repair a relationship that wasn't built to collapse down to this point this is as far as it got built up to#i'm not building more relationship between me and someone who i know is passing soon when they didn't take the opportunity either#like they had just as much chance as me to improve our relationship after i became an adult and they chose to use my mother as#an intermediary which has stunted their connection to me and that's not my fault#i admittedly did not reach out but i was not taught i could safely do that to anyone#because my parents badmouth literally any person they know for one reason or another#i regularly fuck up in conversations with my grandparents because i'll say somethign that is a holdover from my understanding of them#through my parents and it's like. kind of really insulting! and i've been doing it my whole life and i know as soon as i get their reaction#and i can't recover because i don't actually know them at all#so i can't be like ''oh my god i know that's inaccurate i have no idea why i said that'' because i *don't* know until after i've done it#every goddamn time it happened the last time i got a call from them too#like... my bio fam/family of origin is just not good at keeping in touch and i know i'm a product of that#and i know theoretically how to adjust for it but it does require work on the other end of the line too#and unfortunately i know my bio family too well and know they won't do their part#i grew up in the group project everyone hates#and i'm on my way to deciding they can show up to the presentation day without me#i've started a new family project over here with blackjack and hookers
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minglana · 5 months
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i saw someone today on tiktok thats been on low dose of t for 4 yrs. day ruined
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think i might tell the rest of my family that im trans before the winter holidays (so sometime in november/december) but im so nervous weh. i know its for the best thing for myself and theyre gonna be supportive but well. scary
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kodokugumon · 9 months
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the fact that so many child abuse laws are like "its not child abuse unless it leaves a lasting mark" is so fucking crazy to me. You can hit a kid as long as your fists weren't closed and you hit them light enough
#It's actually so hard for someone to be convicted of child abuse. especially if what happened is under the guise of ''discipline''#yeah the kid was fighting me so its not MY fault that he hit his head and arm on a counter and was also on edge of having a panic attack.#this is the proper reaction to a kid being guilty of talking back and being bossy - my uncle#also my uncle: I've never been found guilty under the law for child abuse. you are wrong. also you are the one needing to grow up bc somehow#I'm circling this conversation about you assaulting me over thinking something bad was happening to your brother back around to the fact you#are still living with me#its so funny to me bc even if I did try to leave my mom would try to stop me lmao. ''you're mom is enabling your lifestyle for some reason''#my dude. my mom is ENFORCING this lifestyle. not to mention when you were shaming me for how old I was and still living here...you got my#age wrong??? do your research before talking to me.#literally told me I had no goals or plans for the future. lmao even. he only ever talks to me to tell me that he wants me out#quickly! name 8 interests I have that I did not have while in elementary school!!!#like I'm so mad. at least I can revel in the fact that my uncle was such a pussy you didn't commit to calling the police on me when he said#he would lmao. I can also revel in the fact that he fucking hates it here and tries to avoid being home. and that hes failing at parenting#his own children. I'm sorry brenna. I mean no slander. but you sneaking around and being found out about it and that all the adults knew#about it before he did thus making him look bad is so satisfying. its like watching him judging his gf and my mom for being bad parents#while his kids do much worse things (in his eyes) so fucking poetic#I'm sorry for going batshit crazy in the tags. I am. venting#tw child abuse
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i needed that episode to last at least five hours longer wtf i can't process anything
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I have to visit the great uncle (grand uncle technically but english kinship terms are weird that way) who doesn't like me (and once tried to convince me (a 25 year old) that a high-pitched sound has a low frequency) today so wish me luck I guess
#Like. it's fine to be annoyed by me I'm very annoying I admit#I even understand dislike when it's based on characters or behaviours I actually have or exhibit#But like. I don't really get why he doesn't like me when he likes my parents so much#I try to match his energy and sense of humour#and not to toot my own horn but I am good to him and his family I think or at least I try#Like. he has worse...nieflings? great nieflings?#My family is the only one from our branch who visits and doesn't make a nuisance of ourselves#And like. It's still cool to like hate me or whatever based on vibes alone but keep that shit to yourself#At least pretend to be civil#Not that he's hostile or anything but he keeps asking me like. 10th grade physics questions (and being wrong about the answers)#Or ignoring my contributions to the conversation#Like. dude we have so many common interests. we are both engineers. we both learned to play keyboard (very badly). we both sew.#we are both interested in diy#At least pretend to get along like my grandma who hates me does (other side of the family)#Personal#Sorry I keep using this site like a diary but I also think it is kind of funny that people hate me#Like if you met me irl you'd not even notice me I'm really a blend into the background kind of guy#I don't understand how I could even inspire such a strong reaction as hate like a mild dislike is fine but hate??#Except my grandma though. she hates me because she hates my mom and thinks she is an evil mastermind. I hope I was kidding#Also she thinks I am not as good as her other grandson who is much more successful. okay that's true but not grounds for hate lol#I kind of know why they hate me. but I kind of want to still give them the benefit of the doubt because I'm an idiot at heart
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