#but yeah all you can do is keep at it lol

[stxneflxwers]

off-colored.

⋯⁂ summary. Aventurine woke up sick, now you're full of determination to keep him home – the place where he's allowed to be himself (and so you can take care of him.)

⋯⁂ a/n. barely edited lol. i wrote this in the tumblr post editor... :') anyway. SICK FIC TIME!!!!! I WANNA BABY HIM GRRRR

⋯⁂ characters. aventurine. gn reader.

⋯⁂ w.c. 971.

⋯⁂ cw. fluff/hurt comfort. established relationship. sickness and its side dishes. all lowercase. mentions of nudity. mentions of past trauma. (both are non-descriptive).

aventurine.

🌌 needless to say, he's not exactly thrilled to be sick – if anything, it makes his heart jump into his throat (and subsequently make him cough and choke on his own saliva even more).

🌌 for a split second, he thinks he's dying – but no, all that happened was him rolling off the bed and crashing to the floor with the blanket tangled around him. and then promptly getting thrown into a violent coughing fit.

🌌 you were, for a split moment, considering getting on his case for hogging the blanket again – and then you heard him hacking away for a solid few moments before he releases a very loud, stuffy sigh. uh oh, you think, that last long mission he had must've gotten him sick.

🌌 but then... you realize how you can take advantage of this and force him to stay home for once (definitely not because you want more time with him or anything. totally not.) you grin to yourself, believing it's your turn to win for once – he's hardly a sore loser when it comes to you.

you roll to his side of the bed and peek over the edge, "you sound sick." you blurt out – soft, unimposing.

"huh? uh... nuh uh!" he then sneezes behind his clothed arm after barely managing to detangle himself from the blanket.

"yeah, sure, totally and completely not sick at all. i definitely believe you." you scowl, although it's more playful than genuine.

"but... i've got work today–"

"you say that every day."

"but it's true!" he sniffles and wipes at his nose with the back of his black fabric sleeve.

"yeah, well, too bad!" you say and hop to your feet, already feeling excited over the notion of babying him all day. "you're staying home – coworkers and boss be damned."

he whines your name pathetically, "pleaaaaase..."

"no."

"pretty please?"

"no!"

"...with a cherry on top–"

"oh, shush. and don't you try to sneak out of the house." you cross your arms with an atmosphere of determination – all to make sure he gets better soon, instead of exacerbating any pain and malaise.

"haha..." he chuckles weakly (and dryly from his parched throat), "alright, you win."

"yay!" you cheer and help him sit on the edge of the mattress (that will certainly need to have its sheets changed soon), "good boy." you pat his head with such soft and slow strokes that he can feel the love melt into his bones and heart.

"aw... you just wanted to hear me say that you win, huh?" he teases – despite his ailed state – and smiles up at you, somehow even more charmingly than usual. "sure, sure, take advantage of the sick guy–"

"shush, you! it's not such a bad thing to have you home with me for once, anyway..." you sigh, a soft pout protruding from your bottom lip – your hand stills for a fleeting moment, making his heart lurch right back into his throat again.

"i'm sorry, i'm sorry – don't be mad–" he pleads, something he rarely does, but you've dealt with a sick kakavasha once before, you can do it as many times as you need to.

you smile sadly, your eyes pinching with apology, "don't worry – i'm not upset at all. i've just...missed you more than words can describe." you resume petting his soft hair – he's always taken such good care of his pretty blonde locks.

"i...i missed you too, babe." he sighs in relief, his heart settling back into its rightful place.

🌌 he's surprisingly compliant for the rest of the day – of course, he has his playful and teasing comebacks, but he never truly puts up a fight. even if he felt capable enough, he still wouldn't – not against you.

🌌 you do just about anything for him as he recovers – to drive home the point that you love him dearly and deeply. he barely asks for anything, though, so you end up going above and beyond for him – as a part of some weird, personal gamble with yourself. has he been rubbing off on you? you're not sure.

🌌 one of the worst (read: most difficult) parts of taking care of him is making him eat. he'll complain with a whine or groan and try to hide under a pillow or blanket. you're not sure if it's trauma-related or him just being a big baby over some minor nausea, but no worries, you've got it handled.

🌌 after a bit of half-hearted arguing, he succumbs to your demands and eats at least half of what you made him. he has an arguably small appetite and stomach due to his past, so you let him eat as much as he's comfortable with – as long as he actually eats.

🌌 one of the other worst parts of taking care of him is getting him to bathe with you helping him. he insists he won't fall asleep in the bath, but you don't trust his awkward laugh and blatant lie (or his half-asleep expression). once you've pulled your final straw, you give him a hard, long stare until he finally puts up his white flag and – yet again – succumbs to letting you help him out.

🌌 he's very shy when you're naked around each other – it immediately makes his whole face red, his blush even reaching his neck and upper chest. you giggle a little at him and he pouts, all you do is pinch his burning, red cheek. yet your gentle, loving teasing eases his aversion to any and all vulnerability. he, from thereon, complies with the rest of the bathing process.

🌌 when night falls upon your shared home, he's practically dead asleep. you feel fulfilled. and he's already looking better than he did this morning – the color in his skin slowly returning.

yeah, you definitely won.

[irisintheafterglow]

Hey there!

Saw your requests were open (if it isnt,just ignore this)

But i just love your satoru x reader and co parenting megumi????and i would KILL to see like, something bad happening to reader (like a mission going wrong,she passing out or getting sick or all) and boys just panicking cause satoru loves reader,and megumi sees her as his mother???

Sorry,im a sucker for hurt/comfort trope

Lots of love!!! you're amazing!

aww this is so cute, thank you for the request anon <3 wrote it as sick fic instead of injury since i,,,, have written like 3 things with that trope recently so let's do a fluffy sick fic instead lol. hope you like it :))

cw/tags: established relationship (pet names babe, baby, sweetheart), gn!reader, some explicit language, mention of eating

"the kid thinks you're gonna die," your boyfriend says as he enters your room, setting a grocery bag on your desk and digging around for the bottle of orange juice. "you're starting to worry me too, honestly."

"i'm not gonna die, babe; i think it's just the flu," you groan, propping yourself on an elbow and attempting to sit up. you're unsuccessful, the throbbing in your head and the chills in your arms too overwhelming. you fall back against the pillow with a less-than-ceremonial thump. satoru crouches in front of you, eyebrows drawn and forehead wrinkled in concern. he pulls down his blindfold and you're met with the bright blue eyes you loved so much.

"yep. looks like you're dying soon," he declares with a curt nod and you scoff, a chuckle turning into an aggressive fit of coughing. satoru is lightning-quick, grabbing a new bottle of water and snapping off the cap before holding it up to your lips. "here, drink." you push his hands away, wordlessly insisting that you can drink on your own while still hacking relentlessly. "nuh-uh, just let me help you." with a frown, you let him tilt the bottle toward you and take a few careful sips. "you are frustratingly stubborn," he sighs.

"i have to be if i need to deal with you all the time," you joke hoarsely, sips of water becoming gulps.

"yeah, but you love me for it," he finishes and you agree with a shrug. "easy, there," he warns as you keep downing the water. "don't want you choking again."

"i'm fine, satoru."

"you've been working yourself too much, you know."

"hypocrite," you counter and he frowns, taking a seat on the edge of your bed. you were right, even though he didn't want to admit it. satoru was always the first one to say that someone was working too hard, just to take the burden for himself. it was a red flag, you said a few weeks ago over convenience store sushi; you also noted his 'concerningly inflated ego, lack of spatial awareness, and general disinterest in things that could be momentarily unpleasant.' you'd finished it, though, with a long-winded comment about how his red flags, in all their scarlet glory, made satoru himself. maybe it was just his melodrama, but he'd cut off his hand if it meant you were able to joke like that again.

"i'm serious. i think your body's shutting down because-"

"because i've been away too long, i know. i don't need a lecture right now, satoru." you swallow the last of the water and settle back onto your pillow, grumbling when you feel the side of your bed sink with your boyfriend's weight. "baby, you're gonna get sick, too."

"that means i get to take a day or two off," he points out, fitting his face into the divot between your shoulder and neck. despite your complaints, he throws off the comforter and replaces the blankets with his arms. "don't grrrr me, babe. you need to burn off your fever and i run warmer than any of these sheets."

"aren't i sweaty and stinky and yucky? how can you be touching me when i'm all gross?"

"you mean, how can i love on you right now when you're just being a human?"

"mhmm. you don't find it gross?"

"of course not, sweetheart," he reassures you with a kiss to your shoulder. "i'd be a real dickhead if i only loved you when you were feeling 100%."

"yeah, you're only half a dickhead for other reasons," you murmur into the pillowcase and he laughs, the sound reverberating against your back. before your eyes settle shut, you catch the door of your room opening and vaguely make out a messy head of black hair peeking around the corner. "megs?"

"oi, adults only," the other occupant of the bed threatens, pulling you closer and attempting to flip you to your other side to face him. you unbuckle satoru from around you, though, and manage to sit up. megumi pads carefully into the room, like you'd crumble into sand if his steps were too loud. "come in, i guess," your boyfriend says dramatically with a wave of his hand.

"satoru, i swear-"

"sorry, baby. shutting up." satoru flops back onto your bed and you reach out to megumi, who stares at your hand for a moment before rushing into your arms. "hey, megs. since you're here, you mind grabbing me a soda from the breakroom?"

"i thought you were shutting up, satoru," you remind him, voice poisonously sweet. he echoes your reminder in a mockingly high-pitched voice. "i'm gonna kick you out of my room if you don't stop, mister."

"you wouldn't dare," he gasps.

"oh, i would."

"yeah," he concedes. "you definitely would, but i love you for it." with satoru temporarily placated, you return your attention to the small child in your arms.

"you doing okay, megs?" he nods, eyes shut against your chest and holding you tight. "i'm not gonna die, buddy. i promise." you rub your hand up and down his back, combing your fingers through his hair when you're abruptly swung backward onto the bed. "jeez, satoru, what are you-"

"get the kid, it's nap time," he mumbles with finality, resecuring his body around yours and motioning for megumi to climb in. he does, and you drift off sandwiched between your boys, feeling a little lighter for the first time in days.

if you enjoy my writing and would like to support me, you can buy me a coffee on my ko-fi! you can also check out my full masterlist here :)

[idkwhatever580]

Absolutely not!

Masterlist

Pairings: Natasha Romanoff x reader

Prompt: Natasha and y/n decide to switch up their typical styles for a stark party. What if they switch up something else afterwards?

Warnings: SMUT, switch!natasha, switch!reader, kind of dom/sub in the end. Masturbation kink,

A/N: y’all know the drill

\/ if y’all wanna listen lol

Nobody’s pov

Natasha was really regretting her life choices right about now.

You see, y/n is usually the feminine kind when it comes to parties. And Natasha is more masculine.

So it’s always y/n in dresses and Natasha in suits. Leaving y/n a hot mess by the end of the night as well.

Of course. They decided to switch it up for a party. And Natasha was about to go feral if they didn’t leave now.

So y/n let Natasha drag her down the stark tower and to their sexy corvette.

Even the driving situation is switched. Y/n is typically the passenger princess and not because she can’t drive just because Natasha likes to.

But Natasha doesn’t care about anything right now. She needs some relief.

Natasha is gripping onto the seat when lunch by Billie Eilish comes on.

Y/n starts singing it completely oblivious to Natasha’s needs and it sets her off.

Natasha moves her hand onto y/n’s thigh and squeezes it.

Y/n’s pov

I get it now.

She wants me.

But I’m not about to let her distract me. I must stay strong. It’ll be better anyways.

She rubs her hand up my thigh and I decide to deflect and act innocent. I lace my fingers through hers and pull her hand up to my lips for a soft kiss.

My plan works for a few minutes and then she’s back at it again. She puts her hand on my core and I push it off of me shaking my head.

Then she huffs and says

“Let me have something!”

I shake my head and keep my eyes on the road. 15 minutes. That’s all I need then we’ll be home.

But Natasha just can’t fucking wait.

She grabs my hand suddenly and pulls it onto her own core. She’s hot. I can feel it.

Fuck

I speed up slightly and pull my hand away and she says

“Please”

I widen my eyes knowing she doesn’t just beg whenever. I don’t think I’ve actually ever heard her genuinely beg without being asked to.

I give her a small look and she says

“Please touch me”

I huff and pull away from her grasp again and say

“Absolutely not! That is a one of a kind designer dress and you are not about to ruin it for a quickie”

She whines which makes me clench a bit. Yeah it’s hot but that dress was expensive.

“Please baby. I don’t care. I’ll have Tony buy me another!”

I roll my eyes and say

“Nat. The whole point of a one of a kind custom dress is that there is nothing else like it!”

She squirms a bit and tries to bargain with me

“I’ll have the designer make another one”

I come to a red light so I stop and glare at her and say

“Nat. The designer spent hours making that dress perfect for your body and they will not make another one. It will ruin the integrity of their brand. They never repeat a design”

She huffs and crosses her arms and the light turns green so I speed off.

Can’t this thing go any faster?

I know I said I wouldn’t do it with her dress on. But that doesn’t me I don’t want to do it.

After a bit she whines and humps the air making me almost whimper at her own neediness.

I glance at her and grab her hand to make sure she doesn’t take things into her own hands and I say

“Almost home baby. Then I’ll get that dress off carefully and fuck you. Okay?”

She nods her head and says

“Baby I’m so horny”

I let out a breathless laugh and say

“I can tell. I promise I’m not doing this on purpose but I cannot let you ruin that dress okay?”

She has a moment of sanity and nods her head saying

“I know”

I smile and realize I’m far enough away from the city to floor it.

So I absolutely slam the gas and we make it home in about 4 minutes.

I pull into the garage and Natasha almost jumps out of the car.

To be fair, I do too.

We get inside and Natasha is thankfully, carefully taking off her dress and she can’t get it anymore so I finish it.

“Here let me baby”

I trail my hands down her back and she shivers.

I quickly hang up the dress and make sure it’s safe before turning to Natasha and I almost tackle her into our bed.

Usually when she would let out a grunt she lets out a moan and I smirk.

Maybe I should tease her.

Natasha literally pulls me out of my thoughts when she pulls my head into hers. Crashing our lips together and she makes out with me until she decides it’s enough and starts pushing me down to where she wants me most.

I give in and trail my kisses down her naked body and I get down and see how wet she actually is.

It’s leaking through her fucking underwear.

I accidentally let out a straggled breath and it hits her core making them jerk.

“Fuck baby. You’re dripping”

She rolls her eyes and says

“It’s not my fucking fault”

I smirk and say

“Oh? And whose fault is it?”

She grunts and decides to answer hoping I’ll be nicer

“You”

I smile and say

“Wow. I make you this wet?”

She nods her head begrudgingly and I chuckle a bit and pull her panties down.

I get back up to her core and lick a soft strip up and nudge her clit slightly.

I can’t wait any longer so I dive right in.

Her hand instantly grabs my head to keep me from pulling away.

I eat her out like it’s my last meal and her legs start to tighten around me indicating that she is getting close.

In order to help her out I decide to pump a finger into her which makes her groan and then I add another one after a few seconds. I ease it in and she moans when I suddenly curl both my fingers and suck her clit at the same time.

Her hand tightens on my head and pushes me further into her. Not that I mind. This wouldn’t be the first time I passed out from her hands and legs squeezing me. And it probably won’t be the last.

I moan into her when she tugs at my hair sending vibrations straight through her and it sends her over the edge.

I don’t think she’s ever come this fast before, but I don’t dwell on that as I clean up her juices.

She lets out a strangled moan and then I get a devious picture in my head.

I keep licking and sucking and she’s already wanting to come again.

Ive always had a masturbation kink and sure I’ve thought about it. But I’ve never asked Natasha until now.

“Can we try something new?”

I suddenly get shy when she looks down at me. Although she’s frustrated she understands that I’m taking a big step with asking this so she nods her head and says

“As long as I cum soon”

I giggle and sit up and say

“Will you touch yourself for me?”

Her eyes narrow and she looks me up and down before smirking and saying

“Would that make you happy?”

I look at her and try not to let my submissive side come out and I nod my head shyly.

She grabs my face softly and says

“I’ll do whatever you want.”

My eyes light up and I wait patiently. I pull away and let her situate herself.

She trails her hand lower and gasps and how wet she is and then she softly rubs circles on her clit.

I’m sitting on my knees in front of her on the bed as she starts to finger herself.

Fuck. This should not be this fucking hot.

My legs spread open a bit and I somehow bunch up the sheets under me enough to hump them slightly.

It’s not great but it’s relieving some of the pain.

I whimper and Natasha smirks knowing I’m under.

She slides another finger into her hole and I watch it swallow her digits.

I bite my lip and clench my thighs together. My own wetness is almost flowing out of me onto the bed.

Unfortunately the fact that I am only barely humping this damn sheet is making it so much harder for me to do anything.

So I just resort to watching Natasha as she pumps her hand in and out of her core.

She brings her free hand up to her tit and starts massaging it and tweaking her nipple.

I bite my lip hard and she looks at me with a knowing face and says

“Baby this feels so good”

I nod my head and say

“You look so pretty”

She smiles at me and says

“Thank you baby girl. Do you want to touch me?”

I nod my head furiously.

“Words baby”

I look at her and find my words and say

“Can I please touch you?”

She nods her head and says

“Only my breasts. I’ll do the rest like you asked me to.”

I nod my head and immediately go to kissing and sucking her boobs.

Every now and then I pull away and massage them with my hands to look at her fucking herself.

And then I fall into a daze. I’m positioned above one of her legs and she lifts it up and hits my sopping core and she says

“If I’m gonna fuck myself you’re gonna fuck yourself on me okay?”

I bite my lip and whimper at the thought and I start moving back and forth on her leg. Sliding my juices everywhere.

I end up humping her like a crazy person while my eyes are locked on her hands that are in her pussy.

She moans out and says

“Oh fuck baby”

I moan loudly at that and she says

“You like watching me fuck myself? Do you have a masturbation kink?”

I bow my head in embarrassment but I don’t stop my hips and I slightly nod ever so softly, but Natasha sees it and chuckles a bit and says

“I bet you’ve thought of me doing this. Have you touched yourself thinking of me doing this to myself baby?”

I nod my head and moan. I’m so close and she seems close but she’s been going for a while. I’ve only been going for a little bit.

She smiles and says

“I guess I’ll work it into our very tight sex schedule”

I smile knowing she’s making a joke and I throw my head back when she flexes her muscle.

“Oh fuck Nat! I’m so close”

She smirks and says

“Wait a bit baby. I’m close too. I wanna cum with you”

I nod my head as best I can and it falls back. Natasha grunts and firmly says.

“Look at me”

So I quickly snap my eyes to hers and I pant a bit.

“Oh fuck natty. I’m gonna-”

“Cum with me baby! Oh!!”

I roll my eyes back and grab her boobs again for stability which sends her over the edge and her muscles flex even more making me hit my clit hard and I jerk and thrust a bit more and then my orgasm crashes over me.

We slow down but keep our movements going until we can’t anymore and I look down at her panting. She smirks at me and says

“I didn’t know you liked that.”

I send a half smile her way and say

“It was so hot. You’re definitely gonna have to do that again soon”

She moves her wet fingers to my lips and I open willingly and suck and lick her fingers.

Then she pulls away with a pop and looks down saying

“You made a big mess on my thigh. You’re gonna have to clean it up baby”

I let out a shaky breath and move down to her legs and lick my own cum off her leg and moan at my taste and hers mixing on my tongue.

Once I’ve sufficiently cleaned her up I move back to her face and kiss her making sure she tastes both of us on our lips.

I pull away and lie down next to her and say

“That was so good. Thank you.”

She smiles now in her right mind and says

“No thank you. I’m so glad you didn’t let me ruin that dress. I don’t know what I was thinking”

I giggle and cuddle next to her and say

“I’m sleepy”

She brushes my hair out of my face and says

“Sleep. I love you baby”

I smile and say

“I love you too”

A/N: I tried to finish it quickly. This isn’t really my day I guess but I wanted to get it out since I promised it. <3

Taglist

@ilovesnat @ihartnat

[gucciforasushirestaurant]

Jellybean

summary: you are very pregnant and harry can't go a day without quality bump time.

word count: 1067

read time: 5 min

content warning ⚠️: pregnancy, fluffy fluff fluff

a/n: my brain is such an odd place. i saw this tik tok and my brain instantly came up with this haha because...harold absolutely would lol. Enjoy!

You’d been rolling around on your California king mattress for the better half of two hours now. You’ve rolled from your side to Harry’s rearranging the expensive pregnancy pillow that Harry had gotten you the day you found out you were pregnant, and still nothing seemed to get you comfortable. 

Part of it was your bundle of joy, nestled warmly in your womb having a block party for one. But mainly you were just frustrated, and on top of that sleep deprived and, so heavily pregnant. You were about ready to pop any second, and yet your lovely, attentive husband was on the other side of the world, working. And worse of all, you hadn’t spoken to him all day, besides your daily “Good Morning, Lovie” text.  In all your time together with Harry,  it never bothered you. The traveling, or the fact that you’d go all day without hearing from him. He was a busy man, and a hard worker, it’s part of the reason you fell so hard for him, and married him. 

But with the pregnancy hormones, and the fact that the princess treatment that you’d become accustomed to getting from your doting husband over the last few months has been missing in his absence the last few days, it was taking a bit of a toll on you. 

So when your phone buzzed later that night with a text from Harry you couldn’t help the happy and frustrated tears that welled up in your eyes. And when you saw that adorable contact photo of him pop up on your screen with an incoming call, well you started bawling. You answer the phone and instantly your bad mood dissipates when you hear the smooth honey sound of Harry’s drowsy bedtime voice. 

“Hey, Lovie.” Harry coos into the phone.

“Hey, you” you sigh, trying your best to put on a smile, but you’re not very convincing. It only makes Harry crack a smile. He hates how uncomfortable you’ve been the last months, but he can practically hear your adorable pout through the phone and it makes his heart go all fuzzy. 

“How long have you been trying to sleep?”

“Hours!” you whine, slightly dramatic, “They really are your kid, you know? Just bouncing off the walls, when all I want to do is sleep.” You grumble and can hear him chuckle over the phone. “Harry, I’m serious! I feel like I haven't slept in days. If they’re not tap dancing on my bladder, they’re doing somersaults off my ribs.”  

“I’m sorry, baby. I don’t mean to laugh. I’m sorry you're uncomfortable, and I hate not being there to help. Do you have the pillow? Is it helping any?” 

“Yeah, but everytime I think I’m comfortable, Jellybean has other plans.” you chuckle slightly, taking a breath and looking down at your bump, bottom lip going wobbly, “I just want him here, already.” You sigh, whipping a tear that slipped despite your best efforts. “And you, too. I missed you today.” 

Hearing your voice crack with sadness, it was like something grabbed at his heart and twisted it. He hated, despised, being away from you. Especially now that you were so close to welcoming your first baby. But it was ‘unavoidable’ according to everyone he spoke to while he tried to keep the meetings to Zoom. So there he was, halfway across the world while his beautiful, very pregnant, and sleep deprived wife cried to him over the phone. He felt like the world's worst husband, and he hated it. 

But he had to remind himself that you and your baby on the way were what he was doing all the work for in the first place. And in nearly 24 hours, he’ll be right back in your arms, cradling your bump and kissing your plump cheeks. 

“Aww, baby I missed you too. But just think, this time tomorrow I’ll be right there with you. And we’ll be holding our Jellybean in just a few more weeks, yeah?” he lulled. 

“I know…but you know how impatient I am.” you laugh, and he does too. 

“Oh, trust me I do.” he chuckles, remembering all the subtle ‘hints’ you dropped in the years leading up to your engagement. He takes a moment and remembers that there is one person he hasn’t spoken to since he went out of town, “Do me a favor, Lovie?” 

“Yeah?” 

“Put me on speaker, and put me next to your belly. I wanna talk to Jellybean. Set ‘em straight so mama can get some rest.” you laugh loudly into the phone and he smiles, “I’m serious, let me speak to ‘em. They listen to me.” You can’t help but smile, because it’s very true. Your bundle of joy hasn’t even arrived yet, and it seemed the two had already formed a little alliance between them. 

“Alright,” you sigh before hitting the speaker button, “there, you're on speaker.” 

“Okay put me on your belly.” 

“Done.” you chuckle, rolling your eyes. 

“Hey, Jellybean,” Harry coos, and your heart warms at the sound. Your eyes begin to water when you feel your baby, seemingly to respond to his voice. “Your mama told me you're giving her a hard time. I thought we talked about this before I left, hm? It’s late and you both need to sleep. Okay?” Harry stops talking for a second, as if he can hear the little kicks to the speaker. “I know, you want out, but you’ve got a few more weeks. We are as excited as you are. But your mama is too pretty and needs her beauty rest, so let her sleep, and you rest too, okay bubs?” He hears you laugh, and he feels better knowing that even though you're so uncomfortable he’s able to put a smile on your face. “Now hand the phone back to your mother.” 

“Thank you for that,” you chuckle, “They’ve  actually calmed down a bit. May actually get a few hours in.” 

“That’s good. Told you, they listen to me.” 

“Yeah, something tells me that that’s going to be an issue when they’re here.” you laugh running a hand over your bump. “Just gonna be you two ganging up on me.” 

“Maybe.” he chuckles, “Well, I’ll let you sleep while you can, alright?” 

“Okay. I’ll try. I love you.” you yawn, already feeling sleep creep up on you. 

“Love you too baby. Goodnight.” 

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[dunmeshistash]

God, Maizuru is one of those characters that you can tell who did and didn't do their research on her, like she's a literal slave to Shuro's dad but no one acknowledges it whenever they talk about her, I'm pretty sure the relationship is very complicated but it's still sorta fucked up to own someone you're in love with, this woman has so much untold hidden lore

Also side note, I legitimately thought she was a demi human/beast kin or something because of her bird/feather sleeves, like I legitimately thought it was part of her body and no one acknowledged it because she was too scary or something 😭 like especially after it was revealed Izutsumi was like a beastkin, the whole time reading the manga, I was like "damn why isn't Laios talking to her"

-🐰

Yeah, I've seen even people criticizing her for traumatizing him by fucking his dad. Like, she's his servant, he has the power in this situation even if the adventurer's bible says "either of them can shake off" the relationship.

Plus his dad infidelity is even why he had a falling off with Maizuru, his profile says he was closer to her than to either of his parents until he found out she was his lover. His father being awful was the reason he shut down the only person he was emotionally attached to.

I don't think I can blame her for being his mistress considering the power dynamics. Even the things Maizuru did that affected him as a child were all his father's fault no matter how you look at it.

She attacked him with a hag while he pooped and his dad didn't care, did nothing about it and barely acknowledged Shuro clinging onto him scared.

Plus at the end Shuro is more mad than anything

But as usual he decides to keep it in. Smh Shuro let it out a bit, go yell or something smh my head

Anyway Maizuru is bad cause she was mean to Izu, there's reasons why she acted that way but I can't really forgive her LMAO

I still like Maizuru as a character anyway she's so cute, I love the feather sleeves, its kinda funny you thought they were real LOL, they do look super realistic and the way she moves makes them even more convincing.

[ursuburbanmother]

I’m On Fire, But I’m Trying Not to Show It || Chapter Five

Pairing: Angus Tully x fem!reader

a/n: Omg… I survived finals and all those unit exams. So here is chapter five after a long wait lol. It’s also a longish chapter because you guys are nice and deserve it.

Word Count: ~6.2k

Find: Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4

Enjoy!

Day Eight - Christmas Day, 1970

Angus had retreated to the auditorium once again. He supposed he did so because it reminded him of simpler times. Like when he was nine and his biggest worry was if he would mess up on the sonata he was playing in front of his piano teacher. All because he could feel you in the other room, waiting for him to be done.

He was playing aimlessly and with no particular tune in mind. He just let his fingers glide wherever he felt like. It felt different to be there during the daylight, almost illegal. When he heard the creak of the auditorium doors, he had thought he had been caught. But it was just you, carrying that lavender plant you seemed to be so fond of. You held your potted plant close to your chest and walked up to the stage. He stopped playing to watch you and smiled a little at the sight.

“I kept my promise,” you show off the plant you had improvised decorations with. Little ribbons used for your hair are used as tinsel. There are small pieces of balled up color paper with a paperclip through them that work as ornaments. He could tell you tried not to be overzealous, trying to keep the plant from collapsing from the weight. You place the lavender on the piano and take a seat next to him.

“Merry Christmas.”

“Merry Christmas,” he says back.

You sigh, “Weird party.”

“Yeah. Very weird.”

“I hope Marys alright.”

“Me too,” he sniffs.

He sees you pause to fix your hair. It sits unruly on you, and he can tell you just rolled out of bed. You still look beautiful.

“Um. You never answered my question. Last night…”

He stiffens, “Oh well. You didn’t either.”

You pressed your lips together, “So did you?”

“Did I what?”

You roll your eyes, “Did you feel, I don't know… Did you care? About Joseph?”

Now it's his turn to roll his eyes, “I don’t care about Joseph.”

“Okay. Fine. Then did you care about seeing me with him.”

Angus swallows thickly. He tries to find that sudden rush he felt during the party. The rush that had him so close to just reaching out to hold your cheeks in his hands and collide your lips into his.

He finds the rush in the way you squeeze his hand, encouraging him to continue.

“Yeah, I was jealous,” he prays you won't rip your hand away from his. “Because I care about everything you do.”

You smile and almost look pleased. “I was… a bit too,” you admit, avoiding the word and tugging at the sleeves of your sweater.

Because you think of me that way too, because you think of me that way too, Angus chants in his head like a mantra.

“Because we’re friends?” You cross your arms and hug yourself tightly, gazing up at him through your lashes.

He thinks now that the rush must have been beaten into silence because his mouth stays close, unable to argue back.

“Yeah. ‘Cause we’re friends,” he nods affirmatively, although he has to pinch the side of his thigh to stop himself from crying. He drowns out the ache in his chest and turns into a physical manifestation. There are glass marbles running wild in his head, and they crash against it like a steel floor. They shatter into little bits and prick his mind, berating him for being so stupid, for falling into Elises false optimism, and believing for a second that anything he ever felt would be reciprocated.

A small sigh slips past your lips and Angus suspects it must have been out of relief. He pinches himself harder.

“It all felt like deja vu don’t you think?”

“Hmm?” An odd sound emerges from his throat.

“You and me, begging one another to not be replaced. We’re still the same as when we were fourteen.”

Still the same as we were. The words echoed around, bouncing off the walls of Barton. He can settle with being friends for the rest of his life, as long as it meant he kept having you. If he had to watch you be with someone else, he would suck it up. Like sinking his teeth into a slice of lime without wincing.

He would be fine with you treating him like a wildflower in your garden. He would come around each year, and grow over your tulips, competing for your attention. Practically shouting at you to deal with him. He could wither but come back year-round when you needed him the most. You could harvest him, prune him, press his petals against pages.

The point is you would need him as much as he needs you. …

Paul Huham woke up sick, but not in the way he had expected. He had expected a grinding headache and incredible vertigo. And after five glasses of Jim Beams, he also expected to slip on the ice of the sidewalk as he led Mary to the Nova last night. But he supposed that by now he must have built some sort of tolerance towards it.

Instead, this morning he felt void. He was completely depleted and unable to take his mind off what Miss Crane had said to him at the Christmas party. Mary’s words had definitely brought him back to earth. And although the night had ended… oddly, he still realized that what the two women had said was right.

Angus and Y/n were just kids. Nearly adults in terms of age sure, but still immature and sharing the behavior of one, nonetheless. Miss L/n undoubtedly seemed to deserve a proper celebration. It would be as a thank you of sorts for her ability to rein Mr. Tully in. And Angus Tully needed a moment of distraction from the treacheries of the holiday season. Paul could certainly relate to that.

So, with a groan, he got out of bed. He walked quickly to the bathroom to get his feet off the cold floor and get changed. Afterwards, he went to check in on them in their room.

He saw Y/n buried underneath two blankets. He could barely see her face and it was almost like she was entangled in her own cocoon. Angus however, laid crookedly and clutching a pillow close to his chest, his blanket discarded to the side. There were open drawers, littered pieces of trash on the floor and clothes on the ground. He really ought to remind you both to clean your room.

But confirming you two were asleep, Paul was able to begin the laborious process of getting the ice off his windshield. He then drives into town with the stereo off. He had heard enough Christmas music yesterday and didn’t feel like having jingle-bells grilled into his ear. He slows down as he nears the tree farm. It is empty compared to how it had been mid-November. Vividly he had remembered seeing the town families gathering around and choosing their tree. Kids roamed around as parents debated which trunk smelled the freshest. With the same level of enthusiasm those mothers and fathers had, we trudged up to the nearest worker.

“Merry Christmas,” he smiles awkwardly.

“Merry Christmas. What can I do for you, chief?”

“I’m looking for a tree.”

“Well, you came to the right place. Big fire sale on all remaining inventory.”

Paul hums and tries to find the least scrawny looking pine tree in the lot. He ends up purchasing

one that isn’t nearly as grand as the one Barton had in the dining hall. He then straps it to the top of his car's roof and drives back to the school.

“Mr. Tully, Ms. L/n,” he greets slightly energized by the morning air. He stops abruptly at the sight of the empty beds. There is still a visible dent from where the two had slept. Puzzled, he whirls around the room like they may appear out of thin air. He checks the other vacant rooms shouting out their names.

He stumbles his way into the kitchen where Mary is still in her pajamas, a piece of toast in one hand and a spatula in the other.

“Good morning.”

“Merry Christmas,” she corrects.

“Yeah. Merry Christmas, of course,” he lowers his voice, “How are you?”

“Well, I've got a case of the cocktail flu.”

“Uh, have you seen the kids?” he says with a bit of worry.

“Mm-mm,” she shakes her head and returns her attention to grilling the bacon.

Paul drops his head, “Goddammit, where the hell can they be?”

Hunham takes the search outside, yelling out to the campus quad that has been covered in white. He trudges to the school's theater wing, where he scampers up the stairs.

“Mr. Tully? Ms. L/n?” he pants as he reaches another floor level. He stops momentarily to listen to the music coming from the auditorium and follows the sounds. He had no idea they could do that.

He makes his presence known by slamming the door behind him shut. The piano stops and you both whirl around.

“Merry Christmas.”

“Merry Christmas,” the two say in unison.

“Where the hell have you two been?”

“I don’t know. Just here,” Angus says.

“Come on. I have something to show you both.” …

You hold Angus' hand as you make your way back to the dining hall. His hands feel clammy. A little shaky too. Although yours weren’t any different. You felt like a ghost floating outside your own body.

When you had asked him the question, you had huddled into yourself. It was the closest thing to holding a shield over your heart. In your head you had thought that if you could just reach out and place your hand against his chest, then you wouldn’t have to ask anything at all. You would just be able to tell by the rhythm of his own thumping heart. You had prayed that he would argue against you. That he would say, ‘No. Not just because we’re friends.” But he hadn’t and now you know never to trust the words of a random man at a party.

But if you were reduced to that status for eternity, you supposed you would be able endure it. Truth was that you felt you felt greedy in ever wishing more from him. He could have brushed you off, labeled you as a snob and never have jumped into the ice-cold pool when you were seven. Yet, he hadn’t and to that you owed him.

Because you think that if he had never spoken to you, you would have spent your entire life watching things from a distance.

When you arrived at the mess hall, Mr. Hunham asked you two to wait before bringing out an irked Mary. She took a seat nearby as Hunham presented you with the bare tree and a few wrapped gifts underneath.

“No ornaments?” Angus frowns, unimpressed.

“Ornaments would diminish the Charlie Brown-esque of it,” you say. “All we really need is one giant red sphere.”

“Oh, I’m sure we can round up some ornaments somewhere,” Mr. Hunham pipes in and picks up one of the gifts, “Uh now… this is for you two.”

He hands you and Angus a rectangular package with a neat bow tied to keep it closed. You’re too surprised to open it but do so after you see Angus shift beside you.

Underneath your fingertips you hold, what you always believed, to be the holy grail of gifts. A book!

“Meditations by Marcus Aurelius. For my money, it’s like the Bible, the Koran and the Bhagavad Gita all rolled up into one. And the best part is not one mention of God!”

“Hmm,” Mary grunts in disapproval.

“Okay. Thanks,” Angus nods.

“Thank you, Mr. Hunham. This is really, really, nice,” you rush to hug him, forgetting you’re supposed to be treating the man like a superior. He doesn’t push you away though, he awkwardly pats your back instead, his other arm hanging out weirdly.

He clears his throat, “Well… I know how much of a voracious reader you are. It’s a rarity that must be preserved.”

“Thank you. I love it,” you hold the book close. You sway a little like you would when you are holding a baby.

“And this is for you,” Hunham returns to passing out the presents.

Mary eyes him suspiciously and unwraps it with ease. It’s another copy of “Meditations.”

“So you just give this to everybody?” She chides.

“And,” Mr. Hunham holds out a bottle of whiskey, smiling.

Mary grins back, “Aw. How did you guess?”

“How indeed,” he laughs. He holds up his finger momentarily, signaling you two to wait. “Also, this came in the mail for you,” Hunham hands Angus an envelope. You watch as he sits down and opens it quickly. The green card is shiny and stuffed with cash. Inside is one of those pre-written messages concocted by marketing companies. The only sign of a personal touch is the scribbled note that reads, ‘Love, Mom and Stanley.’

“Oh, that's nice,” you shrug shyly when Angus turns to gauge your reaction.

“Mary, may I help you with breakfast?” Hunham interrupts the sulking.

She nods, “Yes. Please. Angus, Y/n, clear the table.”

“Okay,” you pick up your abandoned lavender and place it next to the much taller pine. “Look, it's us.”

You snicker quietly, pleased at your own joke. Angus continues to stare down at the table.

You sigh and approach him, “Angus. Are we okay?”

His eyes snap to yours, “Yeah. Of course. It just…”

“It's just what?”

“I-, I didn’t get you anything.”

You exhale shakily. For a second you’d thought you had screwed everything up and he was ready to ignore you and forget of your existence.

You lean over and squeeze his hand, “It's okay. Your presence is worth more than a thousand jewels.”

“Cheesy,” he snorts. The first genuine reaction you'd gotten out of him all day.

“Thank you!” You squeak and tug at a loose piece of his curls. …

It's a group effort to get dinner on the table before midnight. Angus begrudgingly agrees to help you with the vegetables while Hunham and Mary handle the more serious stuff. You are still not to be trusted with anything besides a peeler.

You're scraping the final bits off your plate as Angus wipes his mouth with his napkin.

“Thank you, Mary. That was just lovely,” Hunham gleams.

“Wow, is that an actual compliment?”

“Oh, come on,” Hunham waves off.

“You know, I don’t think I’ve ever had a real family Christmas like this before,” Angus recalls, “Christmas dinner, I mean- family style. Out of the oven, all the trimmings. We always leached off of Y/n’s family.”

“Yeah. From Delmonico’s. Fresh from their stoves to ours,” you scoff at the memories of you tipping the delivery driver through the kitchen window so they could remain unseen by guests.

“Well, she’s got the right idea. Next year I’m ordering in from Delmonico’s,” Mary teases.

“Anyway. Thank you, Mary,” Angus says seriously.

“You’re welcome.” She winks at him and smiles.

Mr. Hunham raises his mug, encouraging you all to follow suit.

“I’d like to propose a toast. To my three unlikely companions on this snowy island. And to our absent friends and family,” the glass wavers in your hand, “And I realize that none of us are here because he wants to be, so if there’s any way that I can make the holidays a little cheerier for any of you, just say the word.”

You perk up immediately, hands slamming down on the table and almost shaking your fork off the table, “We want to go to Boston.”

“Boston. Why?” Hunham stares appalled.

Angus catches on and nods his head enthusiastically, “Why not? We want a real Christmas. We want to go ice skating. And I want to see a real Christmas tree with ornaments, not that stupid thing.”

“You said it was nice,” Mr. Hunham says, offended.

“It is nice,” Mary reassures.

“Come on. Let’s get out of here. We want a real holiday,” Angus slithers his hand into yours.

“Well, we’re not going to Boston. It’s out of the question.”

“There's plenty of intellectual-like things there too! We could go to museums or visit statues. Or even go inside Paul Revere's house! Did you know they had that there?”

“Come on Paul, you just told them ‘anything.’ So, take the kids to Boston,” Mary vouches.

“Mary, we’re not allowed to leave campus or the immediate environs,” he insists.

Angus' arm flops down and the grip he had on your hand is loosened. You’re about ready to beg the history teacher to reconsider, and that you’ll stay behind and keep clean every inch of Barton as long as he agrees to take Angus. He must have noticed the flame he blew out from your metaphorical birthday candles as he drops his shoulders.

“But I suppose we could call it a field trip. A field trip would fall under the ambit of additional academic pursuits. There’s even a fund set aside for additional academic pursuits,” he mutters like it's a secret.

“I’ll go pack,” Angus rises, a grin on his lips as he sprints off to the infirmary.

You get up and move behind Mr. Hunham to hug his shoulders and then run to Mary to give her an equal tight squeeze.

She pats your arms, and says, “Alright now. It’s not a big deal.”

“It is to me! I mean I’ve-, I have always gotten chocolates for Christmas. Pass the age of twelve anyway. But my mom orders them from Stockholm and they’re great, they’re delicious, but even though I ask for a two-dollar book… I always get these ridiculously expensive chocolates. Yet tonight, I didn’t even have to ask-, for the book, umm, I-,” you flail your arms around, stumbling over your words.

“You didn’t have to ask us to not order the overpriced chocolates from Europe?”

“Yeah,” you tug at your earlobe. “So thank you. For not force feeding me copious amounts of sugar and cacao.”

Mr. Hunham smooths out his shirt and swiftly wipes underneath his eyes, “Well… I hear shipping costs are rather high nowadays.”

Day Nine - December 26th, 1970

The entirety of Massachusetts looks as idyllic as a postcard. The colonial houses and snow-covered lawns were so Norman Rockwell that you felt sickly sweet. You had attempted at first, to get the stubborn radio to turn on to no avail. After a while you all managed to chat amongst yourselves about local news. Not that you had any recent access to that information to be able to understand it all. Mr. Hunham had his own fun informing you all about the origins of Christmas traditions. Like how popcorn garlands could be traced down to some colonists in Virginia.

The talking had dwelled down as you reached Roxbury. You had been disappointed that Mary wouldn't be tagging along to Boston, but you knew her going to her sister’s meant more than you could understand.

“Here we are,” Mary sighs as the car stops in front of a large apartment building.

“Boy, that's an awful lot of stairs,” Mr. Hunham comments.

“And probably icey too.”

“Mhm.”

Although you understand the hints, you're not so sure Angus is. You kick his heel to break through whatever trance he is in.

“Mr. Tully?” Hunham calls.

His eyes widened, “Right… Mary, can I help with your bags?”

“Yes please.”

Angus is handed the keys to open the trunk. He gets out and collects a suitcase and a round little box and goes across the street.

“Hey, be careful with the box,” Mary orders from the open car window.

“I’ll help too!” You smile.

“No, that's okay sweetheart. Let him be gentlemanly.”

“I really just want to stretch my legs.”

“You can go,” Hunham says, “don’t wander far.”

“Thank you,” you say.

Mr. Hunham watches you jog across the street and stop at the bottom of the stairs to look up at Angus. He turns towards Mary, “You know you’re more than welcome to a room at the hotel. We’ve got the money.”

“Are you out of your mind? I need a break from you and Angus and all your damn bickering. Besides, I'm looking forward to visiting my little sister. She’s pregnant.”

“Oh, that’s wonderful.” He cheers and takes Mary’s hand and squeezes it. She scrunches her nose.

“Mr. Hunham. Mr. Hunham!” She pulls away and cradles her hand like it's been broken.

“Oh, I’m sorry. My hands sweat. It’s hyperhidrosis. Sorry.”

You bounce back to the car, crouching down slightly to speak to Mary, “Angus is asking how far to go.”

The two adults peer through the car windshield to spot the boy, “One more flight up!” Mary instructs.

You go back to observing him like a guard dog, one hand on your waist and the other over your eyes to block out the sun. You hear Mary get out of the Nova and wave up at her sister and who you presume to be her husband.

“Mary!”

“Hi!” she shouts back.

You pout as she approaches you, “Bye Mary.”

“Aww,” she pinches your cheek briefly. You don’t have enough time to appreciate the touch. “Don’t be so moody. I’ll see you soon. And look at the bright side. You get a hotel room all to yourself.”

“I’m going to feel all vacant in there.”

“Just do me a favor.”

“Yes?”

“Eat all the fancy snacks in the hotel mini fridge for me.”

“I’ll stuff them in my suitcase for you,” you promise.

“Thank you,” she tucks your hair back to protect it from the harsh breeze tangling it out everywhere.

Angus’s footsteps are loud as he practically skips over to you two. He loops his arm around yours and tries to drag you away, “Bye Mary!”

“Uh-uh. Where are you going?”

“I was just-,” Angus babbles.

“You’re not done yet. You have to help me up there.”

“Yeah, sure thing,” he relents, letting go of you and switching over to Mary.

You whirl around and head back to the car. You wish you could continue glancing at him, and the way the sun peeks through his hair and makes it appear browner than usual. But it's only so long until it begins to get creepy. Only so long until it is noticeable that you’re not admiring him as just a friend.

…

You settle in at the Sheraton Commander. It's a nice hotel with chandeliers in the lobby. Everyone around you looks like businessmen in a hurry or professors with a lecture to attend. Your room is right across from Mr. Hunham and Angus, and already you feel lonely at hearing their squabble across the hall.

You had kicked your suitcase underneath your bed and then went to knock at their door.

Mr. Hunham answers, “Ah, Miss L/n. Good. We were just discussing what to do for dinner.”

The door widens to allow you to enter, and you find a seat next to Angus on the end of his bed. “I thought we would go out to eat?”

“That’s exactly what I said but Mr. Hunham insists we stay in,” Angus says annoyed.

“It’s late! If we went out now, we could be met with frostbite and discomfort. We will get a proper night's rest and then enjoy the wonders of Boston.”

Angus groans beside you and you hop off the mattress. You silently ask for the room service menu which Hunham holds.

You scan through the foods, “They have some good options Angus…”

“Ugh,” Angus tugs at his hair. “Fine. What do they have?”

“You like Fettuccine Alfredo, get that.”

“Not if it doesn’t have chicken,” you know that's not true, and he’s just trying to be unnecessarily complicated. Still, you play along.

“Alright. I’ll get the chicken parmesan and give you some of it. Deal?”

“Deal,” he rolls his eyes.

“What are you getting Mr. Hunham?” You address the man.

“I don’t know,” he puts on the glasses that had been resting on his head. “I haven’t had ravioli in a while…”

“Get the ravioli. It’s courtesy of Barton afterall.”

Mr. Hunham hums, “I suppose you're right… Do either of you have an aching for anything particularly sweet after your dinner?”

You and Angus smile at each other, “I wouldn't mind some cake.”

“I wouldn't either.”

Mr. Hunham chuckles and picks up the phone on the night table. He presses some buttons and listens to dial tone before a staff member picks up.

“Hello, yes can I…”

You drown out the order as you draw open the curtains to their window.

“Holy shit. You can see Harvard from here.”

“Oh yeah. The receptionist mentioned that while you were busy admiring the Greek pillars. I think she thinks we’re on a campus trip.”

“I can only see layered brick from my window.”

“Well, that's Cambridge for you.”

You squint your eyes, “Are you really that bothered about not going out. Everything closed anyway.”

“That's what your brainwashed, rural, New England mind wants you to think. This is Boston. A city. Things here probably don’t close until three a.m”

“I doubt that.”

“Want to bet?” He whispers, smirking.

“What?”

“Let’s go out tonight. After Hunham declares it lights out.”

You shake your head, “We can’t, he's been so nice to us. I mean, c’mon, he drove us here.”

“This isn’t me trying to, like, undermine or disrespect him or anything. I just want to hang out with you.”

You fold under his gaze, and look back at Mr. Hunham who is still on the phone. “I don’t know Angus…”

“We’ll sneak out for an hour tops. He’s a heavy sleeper.”

Nervously you nod like he might overhear you even though he’s pretty preoccupied on getting a glass of Jim Beam brought up with the rest of your dinner.

“I guess. But you have to use your Christmas money to buy him a book on ancient Rome or something. As a present.”

“I’ll start marking the map,” Angus picks up a discarded pamphlet provided by the hotel. You smile at his eagerness as he tries to slyly look for places to visit. Mr. Hunham hangs up the phone and sighs contently.

“Food in thirty minutes. Wash up!” …

Mr. Hunham was chewing his last ravioli, and holding onto his half-finished bottle of Jim Beam like it was precious cargo. A Farewell to Arms, had come on TV, leading his current tangent. Even though you were anxious to get your plans on track, you couldn't help the way your mouth widened in awe as you listened to his words. You had no idea why Angus claimed to be so bored in his class. Hunham was better than any history teacher you had ever had.

“Although there is no credible proof, of course, that Hemingway described his hometown as one of ‘wide lawns and narrow minds,’ it would track considering his works. Actually, were you aware that his town was once a single entity? It's called Cicero and as you know, Mr. Tully, he was a very big politician in Ancient Rome. He-,” Mr. Hunham reads the clock on the wall. It's eleven thirty-two.

“Is it that late already?”

“Yes sir,” Angus responds, slightly exhausted.

“I do apologize. Most people tend to stop me once I hit the forty second mark.”

“It was really quite interesting,” you voice, “they don’t go too in depth about the author's life in the inside sleeve of books.”

“Well, uh, I thank you. For listening.”

“No. Thank you. You saved me from buying a biography,” you quip, and he smiles at you. A warm smile.

“Y’know you two are a lot like Hemingway. Maybe you both just happen to be two very large fishes with great minds, born into an incredibly narrow, small pond.”

…

You were kicked out after assisting in the clean-up. You then went to your room and put on your pajamas, along with your shoes. Instead of opting to use your usual sneakers, you put on the black Mary Jane’s your school mandates.

You didn’t know why until you looked Angus eye to eye and said, “I think it balances the rule-breaking out. I sneak out, simultaneously obeying my school's dress code.”

Angus had snorted, before revealing his own tie under his coat, hanging loosely and undone over his neck. You laughed, closed the door behind you and fled down the hotel stairs. It was clear almost immediately your coat, scarf and hat weren’t enough to keep you warm.

“We should turn back,” you suggested desperately.

“We’ve made it down one street.”

“Yes, and I’ve seen three ‘open’ signs. You were right, the world goes on after midnight. Let's go home,” you plead.

“No,” Angus drapes his arm over your shoulder, “we have to do at least one thing. So, think, what do you want to do?”

You mull it over for a second. There was nothing you were desperately wanting to see. The places you did were locked securely by key until tomorrow morning. Boston held no particular memories for you like it did for Angus. However, your parents owned a house downtown that you had been in exactly five times, and you always did like even numbers much better.

“You remember that brownstone on Beacon Hill?”

Angus smirks and nudges you to follow him. The walk to the train is painful with the way snowflakes seem to fall and nip at your skin. The only other commuter in their train car is a lady in scrubs and a defeated salesman. There are plenty of empty seats for you and Angus to hog. Nevertheless, you stand, holding onto the pole, your hands on top of each other. You lift your pinky a couple stops later, having forgotten what limb belongs to you and which was his.

You vaguely recall the address. Really you are navigated towards it through pure instinct. Something deep in your gut telling you ‘Here is the place your father will crash to if he doesn’t want to drive home after work.’

Your quiet walk is interrupted by the whooping of who you assume to be college kids extending their Christmas festivities. They leave, stumbling out of bars and into their cars. You don’t feel inclined to question it until you see them driving towards the brownstone. Your brownstone.

You pick up your pace. You follow the loose strands of streamers and glitter that litter the street.

You stop dead in your tracks at the sight of the house. With its lights on and the windows curtains drawn wide open, just inviting anyone to look inside and envy them. Dead ivy covers its brick walls, and you think back on the gorgeous wisteria that you once saw grow one springtime.

People in decadent clothing filter in and out of the house. Some pass you by and stare you down like your presence is a major disturbance that’s worthy of calling the authorities.

You spot the unmistakable pinned up hair belonging to your mother. She is dressed in silk and pearls. She dances with your father with her eyes closed. She looks at peace. She looks happier than you have ever seen her.

“Y/n…” Angus whispers, trying to get your attention.

But something else catches it instead. The mail slot is full of letters and cards. There are some bills too but that never worried them. They waited until they were threatened to have their light shut off for them to actually pay them with a simple flick of their wallet.

You go through them frantically. You go through the November letters, reaching the early weeks of December until you find the last notice. Sent from your school to them. It looks brand new, untouched. The last fingers to hold them before you were the school administrator and a mailman.

You tear the wax seal off and read the letter.

To the family of Y/n L/n,

This is the confirmation notice that your child will be holding over at Janie Patricks School for Girls for the following next two weeks. She will be supervised under the care of our English Department Head, Ms. Patricia Orchard. Any last-minute changes or concerns must be alerted to her now. Contact information below includes…

You halt halfway through a sentence and let the paper fall onto the dirty snow on the pavement. You want to grab a rock off the sidewalk and hit their window. You want to ruin their fun and embarrass them by asking, “Why did you even bother having me?” Even though you know their answer.

“Because we were expected to.”

To them you’re the anchor tying their boat down. They’re two birds and you just happen to be their cage. You don’t pick up that pebble by your shoe, no matter how tempting. You almost trip as your vision become foggy and you march forward and past Angus. You sit at a bus bench and wish you had a big bag of bird seeds to feed pigeons. Grandparents in parks always seem so content doing that. Angus joins you shortly and uses the end of the wool scarf to wipe your unnoticed tears.

You shakily exhale and white fog floats in the air. “I thought they wanted me during the winter.”

“What?” Angus draws his brows together.

“Spring and summer I get. People want to have a good time at the L/n’s. And I’m a pest like the bugs in the grass who brings the mood down at just my buzzing. But when it’s cold out, I’m more tolerable. I don’t complain as much about the weather so I’m quieter. My lack of attendance can be brushed off easier because they can just say I’m sick.”

“No Y/n-,”

“Secretly, I hoped they just hated me enough to want me to spend holiday break at school. I didn’t actually think they forgot me. I’m their baby. People don’t forget their babies.”

“Hey,” Angus snaps, holding your face between his hands. “They’re assholes and later, when the tears have dried, I know you’ll try to fight me on it. You’ll come up with all these excuses for them, but you have to remember that not once have they ever tried justifying themselves. You can love them. They’re your parents. But likability is different. And I’m sorry because I have never liked your parents.”

“I’m such a bother Angus,” you weep, “all calendar year long.”

“No, you’re not. I want you if no one else. I love you.”

You trace the outline of his face under the street lamppost like a tourist observes a painting in a museum. You find him doing the same. Although not much has changed. You have him ingrained in your mind. You could forget about him, not think of him for fifty years but still be able to scout him out in a crowded street.

You inch closer to him, filled by the sudden urge to be as close as humanly possible to him. It’s an urge that resurfaces every once in a while. Usually you brush it off, blaming the cold or an uncomfortable situation you want to hide from. But tonight all you feel is the warmth only he can radiate and the inimitable way he makes your heart race. You remove the hand cupping your face and kiss his knuckles.

“How is it that you want me?” You shakily breath.

“I want you in the spring, summer, autumn, winter,” he leans in closer, bumping noses with you.

“Really?” you murmur, using both hands to comb through the curls.

“I want you, all the time,” He spoke into the short amount of space between you. You were practically breathing into each others' mouths, your lips on the verge of touching.

“Angus, I don't think we should do anything. It’s late and we’re tired. We need to sleep.”

“Trust me, I’m wide awake,” he chuckles.

“You’re my only friend,’’ the rational side shines through. Briefly.

“I want you more than a friend.”

“We should go slow,’’ you bargain.

“Okay,” he presses his lips quickly against you. Eagerly you accept and pull him by his hair. You try to cram in all the lost opportunities with him in seconds. You savor the way his lips feel chapped from the bitter weather against yours. He encapsulates your body, practically pressing you down on the bus bench.

“You’re gonna get us arrested,” you murmur through brief pauses when you go to gasp for air.

His mouth parts, his lips red and puffy, “Yeah. I’m sorry, I shouldn't have done that. Are you-,”

You lunge at his lips, and smile into the kiss. You think this is how the rest of your life is supposed to go. Wherever happens with college and adult life, he has to be there. Because otherwise you don’t know how you will manage to breathe properly.

Then as the party rages on behind you. It floods you. The thing you had been waiting for. The reassurance, the sign you were doing the right thing.

Woosh.

[sloppy-syrup]

Rottmnt tail headcanons! >:3

A continuation of this post :D

(Notes if you can’t read my handwriting + rambles under cut)

I’ve always been super indecisive about how I want to draw the boys’ tails, so I decided to sit down and draw them so that it would stay consistent in future drawings. I’ve always loved Raph having a huge alligator tail, so of course I had to keep that. The others are pretty self-explanatory, the only one I really had trouble with was Leo. What would Leo’s tail look like? After looking at pictures of real red eared sliders what I decided to do was keep the general shape language they all have. So I decided to make his tail a little thicker at the base to keep it simple and triangular. I think it fits him pretty well. Also, as much as I love the turtles doing little happy wags with their tails, I really only think Leo and Mikey would do it often. Leo and Raph would have to be pretty damn happy for their tails to wiggle. Same goes with all the other emotions. I think Raph has just learned not to move his tail much as it’s pretty big and can make a mess of things. Leo on the other hand is just more chill with his tail as I HC him as more add than adhd. So yeah, do with this what you will :)

Notes:

Raph:

- THICC, very long, spines along length, alligator tail lol

Donnie:

- skinny, long, rectangles, pretty stiff, very expressive, useful for stimming

Leo:

- thicker than Don, three stripes, around same length as Don, super chill/doesn’t move much

Mikey:

- very stubby hehe, circles yay, very stimmy, very expressive (more-so than Donnie), short but fat lol

[hanni-bae44]

Title: The Dare (Jeno)

Pairing- Jeno x fem!reader

Genre- american high school football au; angst, fluff (warnings: teenage drama, cursing, alcohol, kissing, a little suggestive if you squint, a fight scene)

Word Count- 12.9k

Summary- It was only supposed to be a dare for Jeno and the team. Although breaking your heart was part of the plan, falling in love with you was not. 

A/N- In hindsight, Jeno's dare is kind of dumb, but I love it lol. I also don't think I've ever rewritten a fic this much. Although I like this story, I’m sick of editing it so please excuse any mistakes if you see any and lmk :)

-

“Okay, everybody listen up,” Johnny hollered, as all the varsity players gathered in the locker rooms. He was the quarterback due to his determination and speed. He was fast on his feet, vigilant, accurate, and physically strong. He even got into varsity as a freshman and through his own hard work, he was able to get early D1 offers. As a result, he was also the one in charge of this two decade long tradition. “As always, it’s a new school year, everyone must master a task from this bucket of dares. Some might call it an annual initiation. Are you all up for it?”

Everyone cheered. 

The team had just finished practice and the coach had left, meaning they had the locker rooms to themselves. It had been several weeks back from summer and everyone was determined to make this their year. 

“Alright, let's wrap it up,” Johnny yelled, urging everyone to silence. “The rules are simple. Pull out a folded paper from this bucket of dares. Whatever it says, you must do, no exceptions. This is the principle in which all will follow. Everyone understood?”

They all roared.

Johnny went around one by one and made sure everyone had their note and read it to the whole team. He had a freshman from JV hold a clipboard and write down all of everyone’s dares. 

“Everyone got a task?” Johnny yelled one last time before he made his way to the front. He waited until everyone said yes then pulled out the last paper for himself.

���Alright, let's see what fate has in the cards for me,” Johnny showed the folded paper to his teammates first and they all groaned in disappointment since the captain had such an easy dare. 

“Great, I have to fill coach’s office with post-it notes.” Johnny rubbed at his temples. Coach was going to kill him. “Remember, you guys have until a week after our first game to complete this. I encourage all of you to be honest and keep your teammates on track. You will need at least one witness and a report of proof. You don’t want to know what happens if you are caught cheating . Alright, you all can go.”

Jeno stared blankly at his card when he left the locker rooms. Just how the heck was he supposed to break someone’s heart? 

“You alright, dude?” His teammate— Haechan— asked him.

“Yeah, I just don’t know how I’m going to break someone’s heart, let alone whose heart to break.”

Haechan started to look around and pointed towards a group of people who were coming out of the auditorium. “How about that girl holding the instrument case? I’ve known her since middle school and she’s smart. She tutors at the media center every year after school. Ask her to tutor you for something, she volunteers there every Tuesday and Thursday.”

“Who are you staring at dude?” Jaemin asked as he patted Jeno’s back, joining in on the conversation.

“Y/N. He’s considering her for the dare.” Haechan snickered. “These dares are getting more unhinged by the year.”

“Tell me about it,” Jaemin groaned, staring down at his own fate. “How the fuck am I supposed to fill the pool with food coloring? I’ll get a month of detention or something.” The boy rubbed at his temples.  

“Be thankful you don’t have to steal an item from the principal’s office. I’ll really get suspended for that shit.” Haechan said.

“You’ll be fine dude, just don’t get caught.” Jeno assured him. “It’s me that has the issue. Just how am I going to break her heart? It’s cruel to make her like me then break her heart, don’t you guys think?”

“You got soft dude?” Jaemin raised a brow. 

“Since when did you care about other people’s feelings?” Haechan asked. “Just ask her to tutor you. Make her fall for you then break her heart. We’ll be the witness, just tell us when you do so,” Haechan grinned and Jaemin agreed, encouraging Jeno to follow through with the dare.

Jeno thought over what his teammates said.

They were onto something. This tradition of dares was going to burn them one day but was it so evil? Heartbreak was normal was it not? This dare was just for fun among the guys. And Jeno was always down for a challenge. He wasn’t about to back down now. Not when this was his last year to prove to everyone that he was worthy of his position on the team. 

-

You were setting up the tutoring stations in the media center all by yourself again. The dismissal bell rang not too long ago but it seemed as if you were the only person that ever took this tutoring thing seriously. Everyone else just took their sweet time. And to make things worse, the copy machines weren’t working. You had just finished reporting the issue to the librarian when you turned around, nearly having a heart attack at the boy who seemingly appeared out of thin air.

Your hand flew to your chest to calm your racing heart while the boy grinned. “You scared me,” you grumbled. 

“A juice for you?” the boy offered with a brow raised, tossing his juice pouch in the air. 

You glanced down at his hand which held the apple juice in a bag the school gave out during breakfast. “You’re kidding me right? What? Had the juice been in your pocket all day or something? The trash can is over there.” You pointed out.

“You caught me,” the boy admitted with a smirk, shoving the juice back into his pocket. “So you tutor here often? What do you teach?” 

You took a better look at him and noticed how he sported a football jersey. Just great, probably another air-headed jock who needed help passing because they slack off in class. You heaved a sigh. “The school year just began but I guess you could say I tutor often. I tutor algebra, geometry, calculus, anything math related.”

“Oh, so you like solving problems?” the boy asked as he followed you from desk to desk as you finished setting up the stations. 

“I guess you could say that.”

“Do you tutor world history?”

“Honestly if you need a tutor for something like world history, you just need to pay attention in class,” you deadpanned. “But if you really need help understanding, I think it’s Taeil who tutors in the history department. He hasn’t arrived yet but you could wait for him in the front. I’ll sign you in, come on.”

The boy followed you to the front desk. 

“What’s your name?” 

“Jeno.”

“Alright Jeno, you’re signed in. Tutoring starts in 5 minutes, you can wait here.”

“Wait. Can you tutor me for calculus instead?”

You raised a brow. “Don’t you need help understanding world history?”

“Nope. I’m good with history. I was just asking for a friend earlier,” Jeno insisted. His face had you doubtful but you didn’t care enough to press on it.

“Okay, you can just wait here then. I have to finish setting up.” 

“One problem, I’m on the football team and I have practice in a few minutes, could you tutor me after practice?”

You refrained from rolling your eyes. Just who did he think he was? “Look football guy, I have a life too, you know.”

“Of course, but could you just make an exception? I can also meet you during lunch hour. Or any time that fits your schedule. Please? I can’t fail calculus, you know it’s a graduation requirement.” He flashed a tender smile. One that was almost too desperate.

“What’s in it for me?” You folded your arms. It wouldn’t hurt to entertain him while you waited for tutoring to start. 

Jeno heaved a sigh before glancing around the media center to look for something, anything, to offer. His eyes must’ve scanned through a hundred things before they landed on your school bag near the desk with a Guitars for Dummies book sticking out.

“Are you learning guitar?” he prompted. 

You narrowed your eyes, staring back at him like he was a stalker. “Yeah… How did you know?” 

“The Guitar for Dummies book is sticking out of your bag,” Jeno pointed out. “I can teach you. I used to take classes as a kid and I’m still good at it now.”

“And what makes you think I can’t just get help from someone else?” 

“Aye, come on. Trust me, I’m good at guitar. We both need something from each other so let's make a deal. You tutor me in calculus and I teach you guitar. If I can’t keep my promise, I’ll give you money for lessons. Sounds good?”

You thought it over as you stared back at the desperate jock. “Fine,” you grumbled. “Meet me in the auditorium tomorrow during lunch. Get your food, then meet me there but don’t be so late.”

“Of course, I’ll see you tomorrow then,” Jeno beamed before scurrying off to practice. 

-

The next day, the football guy was entering the auditorium right on the bell with his food tray in one hand.

At least he was punctual, you thought. 

“What’s up?” Jeno greeted, raising his hand to do a bro handshake. 

“What’s up yourself,” you sighed, ignoring his hand. “We have one hour for lunch, let's just get started.” 

“So why did you want to meet in the auditorium?” he asked as he got settled down. “Couldn’t we just do this in the cafeteria or the media center where there’s an actual desk?”

“The cafeteria is too loud while the media center requires a lunch pass which I’m assuming you don’t have. The librarian is strict on passes.”

“Do you go here everyday?”

“No. I’m usually in the media center. Now let’s begin, this small talk is cutting into your learning time. Show me your calculus notes and worksheets. Tell me what you understand and don’t. We’ll start from there.”

-

For the next week, you met Jeno everyday at lunch in the auditorium. Tutoring him turned out to be better than you expected. He was punctual and actually a pretty decent listener, catching onto the material faster than the usual jock would. You’d also get to know him a bit better and realize that he’s not the stuck up airhead you thought him out to be. 

 As for his end of the deal, you gave him your address so he could come over on the weekend to teach you guitar. He brought his little sister Minji along too but you didn't mind. You loved kids and you also had a little brother that she could play with. So while they played Minecraft together at the dining table, Jeno taught you guitar on the living room sofa. 

“So why are you learning guitar anyway?” Jeno asked, having just gotten back from giving Minji a snack. You were both in the living room and he had just finished teasing you for renting a Guitar for Dummies book too. 

“My dad used to love guitar but he died last year,” you started, “I was cleaning the basement a few weeks ago and found his guitar. I guess I just wanted to learn it as a way to be closer to him.”

“Oh, I’m sorry.” Jeno didn’t know what else to say. All he could do was look at you and pray that you wouldn’t start crying. 

“It’s fine.” You sat up straight and held the guitar closer to your body. “So how do you play the E minor chord again? It keeps ringing out wrong.” 

“The guitar isn’t tuned.” Jeno grabbed the guitar from you and tuned it by ear. “You were holding the guitar wrong too.” He helped you position the guitar correctly. “Now for the E minor. Second finger on the second fret, fifth string. Third finger on the second fret, fourth string. Let’s get you used to strumming first. You don’t have any callouses yet so your fingertips will hurt.”

-

The sun was setting and you figured that was enough guitar for the day. Jeno had been monitoring you attentively as you switched between some easy chords and strumming. You barely got anywhere today and yet your fingertips began to hurt exactly like how Jeno said it would. Who knew playing such a beautiful instrument would be so painful? 

“It’s getting late but thanks for helping me.” You stood up and placed the guitar aside. 

“No problem. You weren’t that bad to teach.”

You rolled your eyes before walking to the kitchen to grab some fresh tomatoes and basil to make a sauce. “I’m gonna make my brother and I some pasta, do you and your sister want any?”

Jeno looked at the clock then nodded. It wasn’t like there was food at home anyway. “Yeah, sure.” He then walked to the kitchen to stand near his sister and glanced around. His eyes landed on the big instrument case you carried around the first time he saw you. And It was open. “So you play trumpet?” 

“Yup, I have both band class and marching band. Some games are coming up and I haven’t played since last school year so I’m a bit rusty.” 

He nodded.

While boiling the pasta, you made the sauce and occasionally glanced at the dining table where Jeno played Minecraft with Minji and Niki. You couldn’t help but admire how wholesome and cute the whole thing was. You’ve never really liked jocks but after getting to actually know him more, you realized that he wasn’t so bad. 

After dinner, Jeno offered to wash the dishes. “I’ll help you,” he had insisted and made his way towards you near the sink. His body was pressed against yours and his hand was on your waist to grab a nearby dishwashing glove. “You already cooked my sister and I dinner, it's the least I could do.” He smiled. 

“I guess that’s fair,” you said while looking at him. His gaze was so intense, it made you nervous. “I’ll just hang with Minji and Niki then.”

-

The next week was the same. You would tutor him during your lunch period, but only this time he would bring you a cookie from the cafeteria, insisting it was a thank you for helping him pass his first test.

“I don’t see how you even have energy when you always skip lunch,” Jeno said as he pulled out the retractable seats in the auditorium. He hands you a cookie again.

“I just ate a granola bar while waiting for you, but thanks.” You began to eat the cookie when you noticed his eyes roaming your face. “Is there chocolate on my face or something?”

“No. I was just thinking. Have you ever skipped class?” he randomly asked. 

“No. But I’m assuming you have?”

“You assume a lot of things about me,” Jeno said knowingly. “How about we break the rules for today. It’s Friday afterall. Let’s leave campus and get something to eat. We’ll be back before 7th period I promise.”

The rational side of you knew better. But then again, you were still hungry from the granola bar. “I don’t know. What if we get caught?”

“You won’t. I skip all the time. They never lock the gates near the back either. You can sneak back in easily and if an administrator asks, just give them one of these.” He pulled out a stack of hallpasses from his backpack. 

“Don’t tell me, you stole them? You  probably got written up for it.”

“You worry too much,” Jeno sighed. “Let's just have some fun today. What do you say?” 

It took some convincing but Jeno managed to get you to skip class with him to grab food. He found himself enjoying your company as time flew by, now realizing that you were fun to talk to and tease. And to think, it only took him a little over a week to get you to warm up to him. Jeno was ecstatic. 

-

On Saturday, Jeno came over once again to help you out with the guitar. Minji also tagged along and as you got to know her too, you found yourself growing quite fond of her. She was so cute and respectful unlike most kids her age. And just like last week, you cooked them both dinner again. 

“Thanks for the chicken Y/N, it was so good,” Minji squealed, hugging your legs. You crouched down and gave her a hug, thanking her for being so cute.

“Thank you too, it was really nice spending the day with you,” Jeno admitted as he held his sister’s hand. It was getting late and Jeno was about to leave but he found himself lingering at the front door. 

“You too.” You didn’t know what else to say but just look at him. You’ve never noticed it before but he had a small mole under his left eye and he even kind of resembled a samoyed dog. Cute, you noted. 

You snapped out of your daze when Niki yelled, “Bye Minji, bye Jeno!”

“So I have a performance next Thursday. A concert  in the auditorium,” you added hesitatingly. “We’re playing some really good classical hits and it’ll be nice if you and Minji came. If you want to though, no pressure. It starts at 6.” You didn’t want to make it seem like you were asking him out, but you did want him to see you play the trumpet since he apparently found them cool. Did you want to impress him? Maybe. You didn’t know why. 

“We’ll be there,” Jeno nodded. 

You bit down a smile. “Great.”

-

The next week, you tutored Jeno like normal except there was not much learning going on. Jeno would constantly get distracted as he kept bringing you random things. And eventually, the both of you would lose track of time, doing more talking than tutoring. 

The day of the concert, you were nervous. You ended up rambling to your best friends Yeri and Xiaojun in the band room while you waited for the performance to start. The three of you have been friends since middle school and now as you were all seniors, your friendship was still as strong as ever. Well, as strong as it could be. Ever since Xiaojun and Yeri began dating, you become a third wheel more often than not.  

“I can’t believe you like Jeno.” Yeri looked disgusted. “I heard he’s been messing around with that cheerleader Karina.”

“Yeah, be careful Y/N, don’t fall in love with him,” Xiaojun added. 

“I don’t even know if I like him,” you clarified. “I barely know him but we’re kind of friends. At least I think we are.” 

“You guys text?” Yeri asked.

“Sometimes. Just about random things.”

“No way. So you’ve been talking to him.” 

“I wouldn’t put it like that. We talk but we aren’t talking.”

“Do you think he’s attractive?” Xiaojun asked. 

“Kind of? I mean he kind of looks like a lost puppy sometimes when he’s thinking. It’s cute.”

Yeri fake gagged which made you giggle. 

“He’s actually pretty cool once you get to know him,” you tried to say. You don’t know why you’re defending him because not too long ago, you swore all jocks were stuck up obnoxious jerks. You don’t generalize in other areas of life, but when it comes to sports? You did. You’ve encountered your fair share of bratty teenage boy athletes over your years of tutoring to come to this conclusion. The majority of jocks were annoying. But Jeno was different. And you felt it within you to defend him. 

“I don’t trust him,” Yeri seethed while preparing her instrument for the concert. 

“Me neither. Just be careful. If he hurts you just let me know,” Xiaojun said and put up his fists in the air as if he was squaring up on someone, making you laugh. 

-

After the concert, you went to the band room again to put away your sheet music and trumpet. You also changed your outfit before making your way back to the auditorium to meet up with Yeri and Xiaojun. You also looked for Jeno. You tried looking for him earlier when you were playing but all the music stands blocked your view. 

Then you see him. And Minji. 

“Y/N!” Minji yelled as she lunged towards you.

“You were amazing, I didn’t know you could play so well,” Jeno said as he stood before you. “Here, I got you flowers, they’re kind of crushed though since I had it in my locker. Sorry I got here late too, I got out at practice then I rushed home to get Minji so yeah.”

“It’s okay, thank you. I’m glad you made it.” You were touched. It was your first time receiving flowers from someone. After a while of catching up, you changed the subject and turned around to introduce your friends. “Meet Yeri, my friend. Xiaojun is my friend too but he’s over there,” you pointed out.

Jeno recognized them from the day he first saw you but pretended like it was his first time. “Hey.” 

Yeri didn’t even try to conceal her distaste for him. Not even with a face smile, just a scowl. “Hi.”

“Okay,” you interjected. “My friends and I were going to go out for some food. Do you want to come along?”

Jeno looked at Yeri who could never control her expression. It was obvious she didn't like him. 

“I’m good, I should take Minji home, it’s getting late,” Jeno said, ruffling up his sister’s hair.

You nodded and reluctantly watched as he left the auditorium. Just what were you going to do…

-

Over the weekend, Jeno came over again and teached you how to mute, along with an easy strumming pattern. 

“Why is the barre chord so hard?” you whined as you sat on the sofa in your living room. Jeno was beside you, guiding you how to play.

“It takes practice to build the muscle,” Jeno wiggled his pointer finger which made you giggle even though it wasn’t even funny. This was how it was when you were with him. He always made you laugh even if his attempts were lame. 

“I actually have a surprise to show you too,” you beamed, pulling out your notes with the chords, “I’ve been practicing a song.”

Jeno clapped his hands together. “Let me hear it.”

You began to play Isn’t She Lovely by Stevie Wonder and strummed while singing along in a soft voice. Jeno thought you sounded beautiful. He couldn’t take his eyes off you. 

When you finished playing, you wiped a tear that came down your eyes. “Sorry, I didn't mean to cry. I just miss my dad so much. He used to play me this song all the time but what do you think?”

“It was beautiful, you’re a great singer too,” Jeno’s eyes were filled with admiration. 

That day he left your house like usual. Only this time, he couldn’t stop thinking about you. 

-

You stared at yourself in the mirror before meeting up with Jeno for tutoring. You found yourself putting more effort into your appearance these days. You knew the chance of Jeno liking you back was low but still, you wanted to put on a bit of makeup, just in case. 

Twisting open your mascara, you began to apply another coat on your lashes when the head cheerleader walked in. You didn’t pay much attention to Karina but you could feel her eyes on you as you reapplied your mascara.

“You like Jeno don’t you?” The way she asked was laced with venom or something. You didn’t like how she was talking to you. 

“Why do you care?” You put away your makeup before turning to face her. 

“He’s mine.” The way she said it made it sound like a threat. But you weren’t scared. 

“Okay, sure,” you sighed.

She took a step towards you as if to intimidate you. “I’m serious. Sure he’s with you right now but you’ll see sooner or later. He’s just using you. Me and him are running for homecoming queen and king together, you can’t break us apart.” 

“I just tutor him okay? So yeah he’s using me. You can go after him all you want, I’m not your competition so lay off.” 

She then bursted out into laughter. Sheesh. Who knew someone so outwardly pretty could sound like an evil witch when laughing? She was delusional. You didn’t let her words deter you though. Sure, you might’ve liked Jeno but you weren’t ever going to act on it unless he did so first. And the likeness of him doing that? Slim. 

You and him were just friends. 

“You’ll see what I mean soon. Just remember, he’s mine.” And with that, she strutted out of the bathroom, leaving you in your thoughts. 

-

You were trying to explain some concepts to Jeno but he wasn’t even paying attention. He just kept staring blankly at his worksheet.

“Jeno?” you repeated for the second time.

“Yeah?” He looked uneasy like something was bothering him.

“Are you okay? You’ve been distracted for a while now. Is something on your mind?”

“Yeah, I’m fine, what were you saying before?”

You repeated yourself. You didn’t know what you were going to do with him. He just looked so out of it. 

-

The Friday before his first game, he had somehow convinced you to skip class again. He was starting to become a bad influence on you yet you couldn’t even find it within yourself to care. The two of you stopped by his house first to get his sports bag he had forgotten and then you both got lunch. The two of you ate in his car and he couldn’t help but notice how comfortable he was around you. When he finished eating, the two of you just stayed in his car and talked for what seemed like hours. Before he had to go in for practice, he turned to you with a serious face. “I have something to tell you.”

“Oh, okay. What is it?”

You were so clueless. So utterly oblivious. Jeno took a deep breath but it did nothing to help. His nerves didn’t subside one bit. He had to do this. He had to tell you the truth. It was eating him up inside and at this point, he didn't even care about the dare anymore. He just wanted to get it over with and hope that you’d understand and forgive him.

“I haven’t been honest with you, Y/N.“ Just promise me you’ll listen to me fully before saying anything?”

You held back a smile, not understanding why the conversation turned so serious all of a sudden. “Why would I hate you?” 

“Because I-” You were looking at him so innocently. You’ve become such an important person to him, he didn’t know how to tell you the truth about the dare, so instead, he told you the other truth weighing down his heart. “I like you,” Jeno said softly. He felt like a coward. A heartless coward. 

“I like you too,” you beamed. 

“Good.” Jeno forced a smile. 

The way your eyes twinkled made his heart sink. You truly did like him. This was going to blow up in his face so bad. He loved how flustered you were right now but at the same time, he felt so guilty. You looked at him with such admiration, he didn’t want to imagine your face filled with hate for him. He knew he had to tell you sooner or later but he couldn’t. It would break your heart and he wasn’t sure if he could do that anymore. He considered the punishment for not fulfilling his dare— that dare he was so sure of was in the past. But that was before he got to know you. The deadline was next Monday and Jeno was in trouble. He didn’t know how to break your heart and keep you in his life at the same time. Falling for you was never a part of the plan.

-

Later that night, Jeno’s football team won the game. After the game, the team went back to the locker rooms to converse and change. To celebrate, one of his teammates decided to throw an afterparty. 

You waited outside of the locker rooms for Jeno. His teammates were looking at you weird as they walked out but you ignored them. The hatred you had for jocks was creeping back the more you saw his teammates. What did you do to them anyway? 

Then you saw Jeno, and the hatred melted away once again. You embraced him in a hug. It was only meant to be a friendly-bro hug but Jeno held onto you way too long for it to be like that. The hug was more intimate than you had intended it to be.

“Are you okay?” you asked. “You look so down considering the school just won.”

“I’m just tired.” He smiled but it didn’t quite reach his eyes. He didn’t know how to tell you the truth and it was eating him upside. He didn’t want you to hate him. Everyone had left the hallway outside the locker rooms now and it was so quiet. It was his time, he thought. He could tell you the truth right now and get it over with. But then he looked at you, and you were genuinely worried about him and the words he wanted to say got caught in his throat. 

He was at a crossroads.

“Jeno, what's wrong?” you asked him again. 

“Nothing.” He lied. He felt like a coward. “Let's go to the party, yeah?” He held his hand out and you intertwined your fingers with his. 

-

When you arrived to the house of his teammate, you stuck to Jeno. He asked you if you wanted to play Mario Kart or beer pong but you didn’t. You just wanted to be near him and followed him wherever he went. You even tried to make conversation with his friends although you could sense that they didn’t respect you as they kept referring to you as a band geek. 

In a sea of so many people, you’ve never felt more alone. 

“I’m going to play beer pong with the guys?” Jeno announced to you softly as he caressed your cheek.

“I’m going to go outside for some fresh air. Find me later?”

He nodded then kissed your forehead.

It was beginning to get stuffy inside the house and you just wanted fresh air. You were leaning against the exterior wall of the house when you saw some familiar faces come from the driveway.

As they neared, you recognized them as Xiaojun and Yeri.

“I thought you guys were tired,” you beamed as you hugged your friends.

“We were, but we also wanted to have fun,” Xiaojun added before walking into the house, leaving you and Yeri behind. 

“We also wanted to see how you were doing, where's Jeno?” Yeri asked, while glaring at her boyfriend from behind.

“Jeno’s playing beer pong,” you began. “I just needed a break, it’s nice to have some fresh air outside” 

Yeri tsked, as if she was disapproving of Jeno again. “That’s enough fresh air. Come on, let's go have some fun inside.” Yeri encouraged as she dragged you inside. You didn’t see Jeno on the way to the pool, but you figured he was just with the guys in the other room and forgot about him for a bit. 

While it was fun, chatting with some people near the pool, it had been an hour now since you’ve last seen Jeno. “I’m going to look for Jeno,” you told Yeri before going back inside the house. You checked the bottom floor first before going upstairs.

You’ve already checked a few rooms but he wasn't there. Right as you were about to turn the corner, you heard your name. It was strung along with Jeno’s name which furthered your curiosity. 

What could people be saying about you now? You hated how much your name was used in gossip lately. And all this because you decided to tutor Jeno. 

A male voice laughed. “It’s been a month and he’s still with that band geek. The deadline is in 3 days, I wonder how he’ll break her heart.”

“Do you think she knows? I mean she has to, right? Why would a guy like him ever hang out with her if it were not for the dare.”

“You think so?”

“Yeah, that freshman on JV told me. I kind of feel bad for her.”

You went up to a random boy in that group and grabbed a fistful of his shirt and forced him to explain. He seemed wasted, and just smirked at how you handled him.

“Hey chill, all I know is that varsity has a tradition of dares,” the guy slurred, eyes raking your body up and down. 

You refrained from slapping him. “You’re saying someone dared Jeno to date me?” 

“Yeah, apparently he had to make you fall in love with him? Something like that.”

“Nah dude, his dare was to break someone’s heart and he chose you,” another guy added with a laugh. 

You loosened your grip on the boy’s shirt and took a step back, disappearing around the corner. You were devastated. They had to be lying. No way the Jeno you knew would do that. He was different, wasn’t he? Wanting some privacy, you opened the door to the room closest to you only to get the opposite of what you wanted.  

Jeno was kissing someone on the bed. Not just anyone though. He was kissing Karina. Perhaps the most prettiest yet bitchiest girl at your damn school. The one girl everyone had a crush on. The one girl he apparently had a crush on too. 

Yeri was right. Jeno was no different. 

Right as Jeno saw you, he pushed Karina off and called out your name. 

But you don’t listen. 

Tears burned in your eyes as you ran out of the room and down the stairs. The music was already loud but it only amplified as the scene of Karina straddling Jeno replayed in your head. Everything just felt so suffocating. You needed fresh air. 

You barely made it onto the driveway when you felt a hand grab your wrist. 

“I know it looks bad, but it’s not what it looks like,” he pleaded with wide eyes. “I just got out of the bathroom when she showed up. I didn't even get a chance to move before she pushed me to the bed and kissed me. I tried to push her off and that’s when you came in,” he tried to protest but there was no justifying what you saw. Or heard for that matter. 

“You don’t have to explain yourself,” you said calmly, as you yanked your hand away from him. 

“Of course I do, I don’t want you to get the wrong idea. I really like you-”

“You must think I’m stupid Jeno. I know about your dare with varsity. And to make it worse, my dumbass actually fell for it. You know what? Maybe you're right. Maybe I am stupid.” You hated how everyone on the driveway was staring at you now. The attention made you humiliated.

His eyes widened. “How did you find out about it?”

“Does it matter? The deadline is in three days is it not? Well congratulations, you succeeded. Was any of it even real Jeno? Or was it just all a game to you?” It wasn’t even a break up. You and him were never a couple yet it felt worse than a break up. You felt so used. 

“I promise it might have started out that way, but everything I felt for you was genuine,” Jeno pleaded. “I never meant for it to hurt you or get this far.“ He hated the way you looked at him. And he hated it even more that he was the one that caused it. He could tell that you were trying your best to be calm but he knew you were hurt. Especially with how guarded you were the first time he had met you. 

“How could this not have hurt me? Was I that much of a loser?”

“No, you aren’t at all, it was just tradition, you know how it is.”

“No I don’t know. Did you really think I was so easy?” You took a second to calm yourself. You had to get away from this place before you completely broke down in front of everyone. “I hate you Jeno. I never want to see you again.” 

But right as you turned your heels, he tried to reach for your hand again only to get a slap to the face. Leave me alone,” you warned. 

Jeno deserved it and he knew it. All he could do was stare back at the anger fueled in your eyes. 

“Hey, what’s going on?” Xiaojun interjected. He was making his way from inside the house along with Yeri.

You watched as Xiaojun stepped in front of you and guided you behind him. 

“Xiaojun, it’s fine,” you tried to tell him.

Jeno rolled his eyes at how your friend always had to involve himself. “This is none of your business dude.”

Xiaojun ignored him and turned back to you.“Did he hurt you?” 

“No, we were just talking. Can you just give me a ride? I want to go home.” And thankfully your friends took you home. You never wanted to see Jeno again. 

Xiaojun and Yeri knew something was wrong seeing how visibly upset you were. You told them what happened in the car and they came to hate Jeno even more. To them, he was always the conceited player who shitted on everyone else. The typical jock. You thought he was different, but you were wrong. Truthfully, a part of you wished Jeno had chased after you that night, but he didn't. Of course he wouldn’t run after you, why would he? It wasn't like he actually cared about you in the first place. 

-

The following week, everyone reported to the captain with their proof of the dares and everyone succeeded. It was a good sign that they were going to do well this season and everyone was ecstatic. Jeno had passed the initiation of some sorts, but at what cost? The girl he liked hated him. And he didn’t even know how to fix it.

Weeks passed and you were still ignoring Jeno. There were so many times he wanted to just walk up to you and talk. But deep down he knew there was no justifying what he did. As if the dare wasn’t enough to break your heart, you also walked in on him at the worst time possible. 

-

It was the night of a home game, when you were reluctantly there with the marching band. Jeno snuck glances at you when you were marching across the field. You didn’t notice him but he saw you and he thought you looked beautiful under the moonlight. He knew he had to do his best to impress you tonight and win the game. 

And win the game he did. 

“What gives man? You look like someone ran over your foot.” Haechan patted Jeno’s back. “We just won! Let’s go!”

Of course Jeno was happy but he was also thinking. Were you paying attention to him? He scanned the crowd where the band sat and admired you. You were having a conversation with that Xiaojun kid and his girlfriend next to you but your eyes were on him. He smiled at you but you didn’t smile back. He let his friends push him around as they cheered. He wanted so badly for you to run towards him and hug him but things weren’t like that anymore. Instead, he felt the arms of someone else around him.

Jeno turned around to see the cheerleaders running up to the team and looked down to see Karina’s arms around him. He grew agitated at the sight of her and peeled her arms off his body. 

“You did so well, come on Jeno, I’ve missed you-,” Karina got cut off by Jeno who told her to stop. 

“Can you leave me alone for once? For fuck’s sake, can you take a hint when someone doesnt want you around?” Jeno was on edge and his voice was louder than he intended it to be. He knew that you were looking at him and Karina would only make things worse.

Karina scoffed, embarrassed since Jeno had made a scene. As much as she hated Jeno, she also wanted him. But for now, she left him alone.

Jeno sighed in relief when she walked away. He scanned the bleachers for you again but the band had left. You were gone.

-

Over the next few weeks, you remained inexistent in Jeno’s life. You began to dedicate your time to improving your trumpet skills for the upcoming performance concert. There would be another classical medley of songs and you needed to have the muscle memory to keep up with all the notes. 

The day of the concert, it was gloomy but still, the auditorium was packed. You played your part as the composer directed, eyes following your sheet music.

After the concert, you went back to the band room to change and put away your trumpet before meeting up with Xiaojun, Yeri, and her mother in the audience. 

“So what do you kids want to eat? Should we order pizza at home or go out for some real food?” Yeri’s mother asked the three of you.

Yeri was quick to propose a steakhouse and both you and Xiaojun agreed.

“Oh, I forgot my bag in the locker room, I’ll be right back,” you apologized.

You made it quick to the public lockers near the band room, not wanting to hold your friends up. You were struggling with your lock combination. It was right, left, right, right? Just why wouldn’t it open? 

“You need help?” A familiar voice asked from behind your shoulder.

You turned around. Jeno.

“Hi,” he started. “Here I got you flowers, you did great out there.”

You looked down at the flowers then back at him. “What are you doing here?”

“Y/N!” a voice from behind Jeno yelled. It was Minji.

Minji ran to you and hugged your legs. “I’ve missed you Y/N. Why don’t you come over anymore?”

You bent down to hug Minji. “I’ve missed you too. I’ve just been busy, I’m so sorry.” You felt terrible, not knowing how to break her the news that you hated her brother. So instead, you pretended like everything was okay. 

Jeno handed you the flowers when you stood up from hugging Minji. 

“Thanks,” you sighed, reluctantly taking the bouquet. “I really need to get going though.” You turned back to your locker and tried the combination again.

“I’ve missed you,” he hesitated.

“Jeno, that’s not a good idea,” you sighed.

“Just give me one more chance. I know what I did was stupid but I really want to make things right with you. Please.”

You managed to get your locker open and grabbed your bag before turning back to Jeno. “I don’t know. Thanks for the flowers but I have to go, my friends are waiting for me.”

You bent down to Minji and gave her a kiss on her forehead before you left. You didn't know how to deal with your heart anymore. A part of you still loved him. But a part of you just couldn’t let it go.

Jeno was devastated that night but he understood. He left you alone after that.

-

The homecoming game was in a week and you had been practicing for what felt like years. The trumpet was heavy, the mouthpiece bruised your lips, and your fingers were cramping. You were over it. If it weren’t for your best friends who also were in band, you would’ve just taken a nap. 

The weather was the topic among your bandmates the day of the homecoming game. It was perfectly chilly and breezy which allowed for minimal sweat for all the marching and playing you had to do. 

It was disappointing to say the least– your school had lost. The fact that it was a homecoming game for your school made it even more depressing. No one from your school was in a good mood. 

You glanced down at the crowd, eyes scanning the grassy field for Jeno who was being comforted by his teammates. There was sweat dripping on his face and a frown of anger as he held onto his helmet. 

After the game, you were going to go home but Xiaojun and Yeri practically dragged you to the rival team’s afterparty. Xiaojun was friends with a guy on the other team and given how sad you seemed these days, Xiaojun wanted you to have some fun. Or in his words, drink, socialize, and forget about the boy. And that you did. You had two cheap beers and that was enough to get you just buzzed enough to let loose and socialize. 

Xiaojun and Yeri made an effort to introduce you to his friends at the other school and tried to make sure you were comfortable. His efforts were appreciated but you still felt out of place. The music was loud and people kept pushing their sweaty bodies against you which became more annoying as the alcohol began to wear off. You made your way to the second floor to use the restroom which was locked. Considering how you heard some noises coming from inside, you supposed it would be a while before they came out. Frustrated, you searched the bedrooms and looked for another restroom. 

While you expected to see people from your school at the party, you didn't expect Jeno to be there, but there he was leaning against the wall, looking all sad. 

You turned around to walk away, but he called out your name ever so softly which made you halt. Just why couldn’t you walk away? Jeno grabbed your hand and turned you around. He had you pinned you against the wall with an arm beside your shoulder. “I miss you,” he said softly. His eyes were laced with something so delicate causing you to melt under his gaze. He was so close to you, breathing down your neck. The way he looked at you was so intense yet so soft and for a split second you could almost feel as if he might’ve actually liked you. “You have no idea what you do to me,” he mumbled, fingers trailing your jawline. 

“Jeno. What are you doing?” You hated how your voice came out so low. Your heart was beating rapidly against your chest from the way he had you pinned. You could have pushed him away but you didn’t. Because a part of you missed him too. 

“Will you let me kiss you?” Jeno muttered. 

You hated yourself for wanting to say yes but you couldn’t help how soft his lips looked. You were about to stupidly say yes when you heard your friend’s voice echo. “Get off her, you jerk.” The next thing you knew, Jeno was being pulled off you. Xiaojun had come up from behind and fisted Jeno’s shirt, pushing him against the wall. 

“Xiaojun, it’s fine, get off him,” you tried to intervene but your words rang silent. 

“Leave her alone. Haven't you done enough?” Xiaojun hissed at Jeno. 

“For the last time, mind your own business dude.”

Xiaojun scoffed as he tightened his grip, “And for the last time, leave Y/N alone. You’ve done enough. Don’t tell me you suddenly like her now that she's over you.”

Jeno pushed Xiaojun’s grip away and took a step closer to him to assert the fact that he was taller than him. “She’s not over me, just look at her, she misses me too.” His words came out slurred.

Xiaojun sighed. “I get it, the girl you played dumped you and you lost the game and you're angry, but genuinely, what the fuck is wrong with you?”

Jeno had frustration laced in his eyes, he hated when people pitied him. It was almost scary in the way he let out a bitter chuckle. 

“Fuck you,” Jeno said as a tear rolled down his cheek. He directed a finger to Xiaojun’s chest. “You don’t know anything.”

“Then enlighten me. What could your problem possibly be?”

“My problem is you,” Jeno said with fire in his eyes. He shoved Xiaojun with both hands and he shoved back. 

You couldn’t let Jeno hit Xiaojun like that. You ran to Xiaojun and placed yourself in the middle to try and get him to calm down before things escalated but Jeno had fire in his eyes. He looked back at you then at Xiaojun. He scoffed before walking away. 

“Are you okay?” Xiaojun mumbled softly with his hand on your shoulder. 

“Yeah, I’m okay. You didn’t have to step in like that but thank you.”

“Of course I had to, you’re my best friend.” Xiaojun pulled you in for a hug along with Yeri too.

Before you left that night, you saw Karina and Jeno together in the kitchen and she had her hand on his arm. You made eye contact with Jeno but you looked away as soon as it happened. It was only for a brief moment as you passed by but it still managed to make you feel uneasy. It shouldn’t have bothered you so much, but it did. 

Lee Jeno was just so damn confusing. 

-

The next day was homecoming and it was daunting to say the least. You weren’t even planning on going but you already bought a ticket and Yeri was persistent on how you shouldn’t let the lack of a date get in the way of your senior year plans.

The first thing you saw when you walked into the gymnasium was Karina with her arm around Jeno’s. You weren’t sure what hurt most, the fact that he looked so handsome in a suit, or the fact that he was here with the girl you hated the most. 

Yeri saw you glancing at Jeno and his date and immediately pulled you to check out the food selection. 

Looks like all homecoming had to offer was off-branded chips and cookies. Xiaojun and Yeri took a bite of the chocolate chip cookie before tossing it out. You couldn’t even blame them. They were stale but it didn’t stop you from stuffing your mouth. 

In the meantime, Yeri poured you some punch and encouraged you to slow down on the cookies. “Brighten up, homecoming might’ve not been what you were expecting but it’s our last one, so let's make the most of it.”

“You’re right,” you sighed. “I just hate how I’m all alone and Jeno is with Karina. I still hate how dumb I was. I should’ve believed you right away when you said they were messing around. I just thought he was different.” 

Yeri didn’t know what else to do but distract you. “Hey you love this song,” she cheered while wiggling her hips, “dance with me?” she reached for your hand.

You felt bad, not wanting to interfere with their night. “It’s fine, go have fun with Xiaojun,” you assured her.

“One dance,” Yeri proposed. “Babe, you too, you can find your friends later” she turned to her boyfriend.

“Fine,” you rolled your eyes playfully. 

-

The one dance turned into one hour as the song kept changing from hit to hit. It wasn’t until the DJ played a slow song that you opted out of. Yeri and Xiaojun could take it from there. 

You made your way to a vacant table near the back and watched as all the couples danced. Your eyes drifted to Jeno who was slowly dancing with Karina. You couldn’t help but compare yourself. You looked down at your dress that had rhinestones that decorated the exterior of the top. You didn’t even know why you got all dressed up when you had no one to impress.

Not wanting to look lonely, you poured yourself some punch then made your way out of the gymnasium to the hallway. You took off your heels before sitting down against the lockers a few steps away from the entrance. You didn’t mean to cry, but in the moment, you felt like crying. You took a sip of your fruit punch and let the faint music drown your thoughts. You stayed like that for a while.

-

Meanwhile inside of the gymnasium, Jeno found solace with his teammates. He needed to get away from Karina. She was starting to get on his nerves. Just how much could that girl talk?

Jeno had spotted Yeri and Xiaojun dancing to the music but you weren't in sight.

Moments passed where he scanned the whole gym just to look for you. He was about to go outside when Karina found him again and wrapped her arms around him. 

The homecoming queen and king announcement was about to begin and Karina kept going on about how she was going to win. Jeno wanted to rip his hair out at how annoying she was. 

A while later, Jeno, Karina, along with all the people running, came to the stage. Jeno wished the person with the mic would hurry up and announce the winners already. He didn’t care about any of it. Noy the dance. Not Karina. Not being king. 

In the end, Karina was crowned homecoming queen and Jeno was crowned homecoming king. 

Jeno scanned the crowd for you but nothing. All the clapping and cheering from his fellow classmates was only making him more frustrated. He never wanted any of this.

He quickly gave his speech and waited for Karina to make her speech. He was about to run off after the pictures when Karina pulled on his arm to whisper in his ear. “Give me this dance then you can chase after that bitch I don’t care. If you ruin this for me, you’ll regret this.”

Jeno glared at her threat and whispered back in her ear, “You better keep your promise,” he grumbled. He has never hated Karina more but he had to keep his composure in front of everyone. 

As Jeno was slow dancing with Karina, all he could think about was you. He couldn’t wait until the dance was over so he could look for you. 

-

“Y/N! There you were, I was looking for you everywhere,” Yeri sighed in relief. “What are you doing on the floor, get up.”

Yeri helped pull you up while you gnawed on the empty cup. You had been listening to the homecoming king and queen announcements outside the gym and heard how Jeno and Karina won queen and king. You were happy for them. Truly. “How’s Jeno? Does he look happy dancing with Karina?” you ask Yeri. A part of you wanted her to say yes just so you could get over Jeno once and for all. 

“Not really, let's forget about him though,” Yeri sighed. “Xiaojun and his friends are going to get some real food though. How does burgers and fries sound?”

“I guess it sounds good.”

“Great, come on, Xiaojun is already in the limo.”

“Wait!” A familiar voice pulled you to a halt. “Please, I just want to apologize.”

Jeno froze as he took in how beautiful you looked up close. If things were different– if things went his way, he would’ve danced with you tonight. Instead, he had to dance with someone else and faced the consequences of his own actions.

“Come on,” Yeri rushed but you didn’t move. 

You wanted to hear what he had to say. 

“Please Y/N, I’m sorry for yesterday. I was drunk and angry. I know it doesn’t justify anything but please, I just want things to be okay with us again.” The way you looked back at him was so heartbreaking and he knew it was all because of him. 

“It’s fine, Jeno. Just go back to Karina and leave me alone.”

“There’s nothing going on with me and her,” he said dryly. He felt defeated. 

You didn’t reply and turned to leave with Yeri. There was no use in talking to him when all he did was lie. 

-

The following week, the players knew they had an earful coming. The captain was conditioning and being rough on the players for losing. He did the usual for practice. The teammates were split into teams to do rounds then practiced offensive and defensive positions the following days. Only, it was more intense. Jeno was unfortunate enough to have a contact injury during practice. 

A week had passed and news of Jeno’s minor injury spread like wildfire throughout the school. You saw him around the hallway and he looked fine but how could you be so sure? You couldn’t help but be worried about him. You tried to ignore his presence around the school but everywhere you turned, there was a reminder of him. The posters on the wall of him and football. The grassy fields and even the juice from the cafeteria reminded you of the first day you met him. He was everywhere.

“Are you okay?” Yeri asked you, pulling you out of your daze.

“What?” 

“Were you thinking about him who shall not be named again?” 

“Maybe,” you sighed, glancing down at your desk to see your blank notebook. “He got injured at practice last week,” you reminded her. 

“He’s fine, don’t worry about him. Here, you can copy my notes,” Yeri offered, seeing how distracted you were.

“Thanks, I just need to use the restroom first.”

After asking your teacher to use the restroom, she gave you the hallway pass and you walked to the nearest bathroom which was in the building adjacent to yours. Eager to feel more awake, you splashed your face with water from the sink. 

“How’s it going with you and Jeno?” a familiar voice asked.

You wiped your face with a paper towel then turned to the direction the voice came from beside you. Karina was fixing her bangs and reapplying her makeup in the mirror.

“What?” you asked. 

“We’ve got to stop meeting like this,” she sighed. “I said how are things going with you and Jeno?” she sighed, now leaning against the sink to face you. 

“Why do you care?” 

“I don’t. I’m just asking,” she shrugged. “He seems to really like you although I don't know why.”

“I told you there’s no competition. Just be with him already, I don’t care.”

She chortled. “I don’t want him anymore. I deserve better and quite frankly trash deserves trash.”

“Okay, insult me all you want, I don’t care. I’m leaving.” You turned your heels to leave when she said, “Jeno’s in love with you,” causing you to stop in your tracks. “What?” You turned around, not understanding why she kept messing with you. 

She pursed her lips. “I guess he hasn’t told you yet… Although I don’t see what he sees in you, he seems to love you. You should forgive him.”

“He told you this? Word for word that he loved me?” 

“Ask him yourself” she said, before putting her lipstick back in her bag. She didn’t say anything else after that and just strutted out of the restroom, leaving you dumbfounded and distraught. You took her words with a grain of salt. There was no way he loved you. As much as you didn’t want to believe Karina, you couldn't help but think about the conversation on your way back to your class.

-

After the bell rang, Yeri walked you to your next class. On the way, you couldn’t help noticing Jeno in the hallway. He was walking alone and looked so sad. He loves you, the words Karina said resonated in your head. It was driving you insane. 

“Come on Y/N, don’t even look at him,” Yeri urged, but you couldn’t get your eyes off him. Jeno seemed to have noticed you staring at him too and jogged towards you from the other side of the hallway.

“Great, he’s heading towards us.” Yeri groaned.

“Hey,” Jeno said softly.

“Hi,” you replied.

“The bell is about to ring. I’m gonna go, are you going to be okay?” Yeri asked you while glaring at Jeno.

“Yeah, I’m fine,” you replied and Yeri walked up the stairs to her next class. 

“I know I already apologized, but I really do mean it. I'm sorry for what happened at the party. I don’t expect you to forgive me, I know it was wrong to push your friend and about what I said, I’m really sorry, it just came out, I was just so annoyed with myself and your friend acted like a jealous boyfriend and I don’t know what got into me. He was only standing up for you and I didn’t mean for things to end like that-“

“It’s okay,” you blurted out, putting an end to his rambling. The bell rang right after you spoke up. You didn’t completely forgive him yet you also didn’t want to hate him anymore. “How’s your head? I heard you got injured last week.”

“Oh yeah, it was just a minor injury. Nothing serious.”

“That’s good.”

“Yeah.”

You hated how awkward it was. Even when you first met, it was never this awkward. 

Jeno gripped onto the strap of his backpack. “So are we friends again? Things will be different this time, I promise.” 

“I don’t think that’s a good idea Jeno.”

���Come on, how can you just act like there was nothing between us? We were friends before weren’t we?” he pleaded. 

“How can you act like I wasn’t just a dare to you Jeno? Do you think you’ll say sorry and everything will just be okay, we’ll be friends again?”

“What do you want me to do then? I can’t change the past, all we can do is move on.” Jeno knew you still cared about him regardless of how you were pushing him away. He just had to be patient and time would heal everything. He was sure of it. 

“I don’t know. I just need time.” You were so tired of being mad at him. You wanted to forgive him, you really did.

“Take all the time you need,” Jeno nodded, before stepping backwards. “You know where to find me.”

And just like that, he strolled away with a piece of your heart. For some reason, you felt dejected. 

-

The week before winter exams, you were filling your time studying. You had a stack of review packets from your teachers on your desk and you were exhausted. Perhaps you were delirious, even because you had no idea what you were doing but you drove to Jeno’s house. You didn’t know what you were even going to say yet but something inside you just wanted to see him. 

When you made it to his front doorstep, you rang the doorbell, anxiously picking at your cuticles. You waited and waited. In a split second of realizing this was a bad idea, you were about to walk away when the door finally opened.

“Hi,” Jeno said. His hair was all disheveled and he was in a baggy hoodie and basketball shorts. He just looked so comfortable and huggable.

“Hi,” your voice was barely above a whisper.

“So what are you doing here?” He closed the front door and stepped towards you.

“I honestly don't know. I guess I just wanted to see you. Can we talk?” You took a seat on the bench that was on the front porch.

“Yeah, sure.” Jeno ran his hand through his hair before taking a seat next to you too.

You blew air into your hands as an attempt to warm them up. It was so chilly outside and it only made you more nervous as you chose your words carefully. “I don’t know why I’m here,” you admitted. “I’m supposed to be studying right now but I just couldn’t stop thinking about you,” you admitted. 

“I can’t stop thinking about you either.”

You smiled at that, now glancing over at him and you practically melted under his gaze. He was so attractive under the moonlight and your heart only swelled.

“Did you even need help with calculus?” you began, referring to the day you met him. It was always on your mind to ask but you never got the chance. 

Jeno sighed. “Honestly? I never needed help with calculus. I actually needed help with world history but you didn’t teach it so I just pretended to be bad at math.”

For some reason, his response made you chortle. “I had a feeling. You caught onto the material so fast. And if you still want to. Do you still want to be friends?” A part of you also wanted to ask him if he had loved you like Karina claimed but it wasn’t the right time. Another day, you supposed. 

“Yeah, of course.” Jeno smiled.

-

The next week, Xiaojun came to you saying that Jeno apologized to him. That made you happy. Although Xiaojun still disliked Jeno, you forgave him. Your memories brought you back to the night you left Jeno’s porch after catching up with him. You felt like the weight in your heart melted away. 

You spent the rest of the week reconciling with Jeno. You let him walk you to class. You ate lunch with him. You laughed with him. And you even let him back in your heart as friends. You really felt like he had changed. The night before exams, you even spent the whole day at his house, studying with him. You were cozied up on his bedroom floor, leaned against the side of his bed. You quizzed him on his classes and he quizzed you on yours for what seemed like forever before he called for a break. 

“So what are you going to do when school’s out?” he asked, tossing his flashcards to the side. 

“I’m not sure. I think my aunt and grandma are coming to visit. How about you?”

“I don’t know, but I’m nervous. I don’t know how the holidays are going to work out with my mom and dad. I’m probably going to have to go back and forth.”

“I’m sure it’ll be okay. Look on the bright side, two Christmases to look forward to,” you smiled, encouraging him to cheer up.

“I guess you’re right.” Jeno reconsidered and looked down at his hands in a pensive state. 

“What’s wrong?” You scooted closer to him, pulling his hands down from his face.

Jeno glanced up at you then scanned your face. He hadn’t been this close to you in what seemed like forever. You were so close to him and your lips looked so inviting. He could hear your breathing and the sound of your heart thumping against your chest. Just for a moment, he wondered what it would be like to kiss you, so he did. He leaned forward and closed the space between you and him. 

You didn’t know what to do but to kiss him back. You reached for his neck and pulled him even closer. The next thing you knew, you were on his lap and his hands were on your waist, not daring to go any lower. His fingers trailed underneath your top and his thumbs circled your bare skin leaving you breathless. 

“I love you,” Jeno muttered against your lips. 

“Jeno,” you breathed. Reality crashed back down the moment you looked into his eyes. You couldn’t do it. You couldn’t be here right now, knowing how you loved him too. You got off his lap and began to look for your bag. “I’m sorry, I can’t do this. I should go.”

“Wait,” Jeno jumped up. 

“This was a bad idea. I just wanted to be friends, Jeno.” 

“You’re lying to yourself if you think we can be just friends.”

“Well, we can’t do this Jeno. I can’t be with you.”

“Why? Is there someone else?”

“It’s not that. I just can’t, okay? I’m really trying to just leave this all behind us, but I can’t no matter how hard I try. I just need to go.”

Jeno didn’t chase after you that night. He couldn’t get over the fact that he had hurt you too. 

-

Exam week passed by in a blur. 

It was now winter break and Jeno had spent his days thinking about you and what you were up to. Jeno wasn’t sure if you wanted to see him too but he had to apologize for that night. He had to make things right no matter how much you pushed him away. 

He took a deep breath before he rang the doorbell. His lips curved into a smile  the moment he saw your face. 

“What are you doing here?” You were surprised to see Jeno, but you didn’t exactly hate the fact that he was here. You knew that he’d want to talk eventually. 

Before Jeno could speak, Minji called out your name and ran towards you.

Minji hugged your legs and she looked even more grown than the last time. You’ve missed her. “How are you?” you cooed as you kneeled down to her.

“I miss you so much Y/N. I wanted you to come over but Jeno kept saying no. He’s so mean,” she teased as she glared back at her brother. 

Jeno walked towards you. “Hey.”

“Hey.” You forced a smile at him. You then looked back at Minji. “Remember my little brother? Niki is in his room playing Minecraft, do you wanna go play with him?” you asked Minji. 

“Niki!” she squealed as she ran up the stairs. 

“So what’s up?” you asked, taking a seat on the first step of the stairs. 

Jeno followed, taking the vacant spot beside you. “I wanted to ask how your exams went.”

“They were fine. Is that all?”

“And I wanted to say that I’m sorry for the other day. I shouldn’t have kissed you. I know you wanted to be just friends but I thought maybe I could change your mind which I shouldn’t have done. I’ll respect your wishes from now on. I just want us to be friends again, that’s all. Nothing more.”

“That’s not why I’ve been avoiding you Jeno.”

“Was it because I told you I loved you?”

“No it wasn’t. It’s just- How can you just act like I wasn’t just a dare to you? Goddaamit Jeno.” Frustrated, you brought your hands to your face. 

“So you still haven’t forgiven me..”

You looked back up at him. “I’m trying, it’s just everytime I look at your face, all I see is Karina on top of you and her dancing with you at homecoming. I thought I was over it but I’m not.” 

He reached for your hand. “Can you just trust me this once? I have never messed around with Karina. That night I was using the bathroom at the party, she must’ve followed me and waited until I got out because when I came out of the bathroom, she just kissed me and pushed me onto the bed. I was trying to push her off when you came in. I was telling the truth that day. And that day at homecoming? It was the only way to get her off my back. I told her to leave our relationship alone and she agreed but only if I was beside her for homecoming. Haven’t you noticed how she’s left us alone now? I swear I haven’t talked to her since that night. I only ever agreed to run with her because she kept asking too and I really did bail on her at the end but then she made the promise and I really just wanted her to leave us alone so I went with her. Please believe me,” Jeno pleaded as he squeezed your hand in between his. So Karina was telling the truth. “And I know the dare was a shitty thing but I don't regret it one bit. If I never went through with the dare, I wouldn't have gotten to know you. And meeting you was the best thing that has ever happened to me this year, can you trust that? I meant it that night when I said I love you. I still do and it’s okay if you don’t love me back. I just want us to be okay again.” 

You shed a tear when Jeno poured his heart out. “Okay. I forgive you. For real this time. But only because you have such a way with words,” you smiled.

“Good,” he smiled. “Because I love you.”

“Jeno,” you sighed. “I met with Karina in the restroom the other day and she told me that you said that you loved me.” You looked at him, hoping he would elaborate. 

“I said I liked you, but I do love you too,” Jeno admitted. “I told her to leave you alone too but I guess she broke her promise. Did she bother you?”

“No. She was being quite nice actually.”

[ Flashback: The night of the homecoming party after the fight with Xiaojun ]

Jeno was tired of everything. He had lost the homecoming game and yet he couldn’t even find it within himself to care. Not when he messed up everything with you. He had his chance to make things right but then that Xiaojun dude just had to show up. He was so angry at himself. He wanted to just drink every thought away but then he thought about it. Drinking would just be useless. 

He was swirling his drink around in his cup when Karina walked up to him. She smiled which caused him to roll his eyes. He was about to walk away when she grabbed at his arm, trying to convince him to see her as more than just a classmate. 

“Come on Jeno, I’m right here. Can’t you see that I like you? I’ve been chasing you for years now, are you really gonna play hard to get still?”

“Are you that dumb?” He was tired of being nice as he went off in her face. “I don’t like you and I never will.”

“Is it Y/N? People are saying you actually fell for that band nerd. Is it true? You really did like her?” 

“I do. And you know why? Because she’s a good person unlike you. I’ll never even as much as like you so just go away,” he spat, eyes boring in hers to make sure his distaste was clear. 

“You’re still hung up on that bitch? Isn’t that pathetic?” she asked genuinely. 

“Watch your mouth,” he warned as he diverted his attention towards Karina again. “If anything, you’re the pathetic one. I’ve tried to be nice but I’ve had it with you so move.” He pulled his arm out of her grip then began to walk away only to be stopped again by her hand. From the corner of his eye, he saw you leaving the house with your friends and stood frozen when you locked eyes with him. His heart sank when you diverted your gaze. 

“Jeno-“ Karina pleaded, seeing how he was staring at you. She tugged at his arm only to be met with a grunt. “I’ll leave you and her alone,” Karina began in a desperate attempt. “Just go to homecoming with me please. Be homecoming king. Your name is already in the running and you promised me at the start. Please, just this once. Do me one last favor and I’ll never talk to you again after that. I’ll even help you get her back, just please.”

Jeno turned to face her. “You want to be homecoming queen and king with me that bad?”

“Yes.” She gripped his arm even tighter. “It’s everything to me. Just go with me for one night. Then I’ll leave you and her alone forever.”

“Fine. But don’t help me get her back. Do nothing. All I want is for you to leave us both alone.”

“Deal,” she was on the verge of tears, feeling utterly heartbroken because of Jeno. 

“You better keep that promise,” Jeno said sternly and Karina knew better than to say anything else.

[ Present ] 

You felt a tear trickle down your cheek after hearing how he defended you. 

Jeno’s hand went to your cheek and his thumb swiped over the tear. 

“I like you too,” you said with a smile. “And I love you too.”

“I love you too… So do you still want to be just friends or should we finish what we started the other day in my room?” He said while raising his eyebrows suggestively. Jeno was his usual self again, enjoying how flustered you looked right now. 

“Oh my god, shut up. My aunt is upstairs, she could hear you,” you whispered after flicking his arm. “Come on, let's go to Niki’s room and see what they built in Minecraft.” You stood up, holding out your hand. 

“Can’t we just go to your room instead?” Jeno whined playfully while grabbing your hand. 

You rolled your eyes while trying to bite back a smile. “Nice try, but no.”

For the rest of the day, Jeno stayed over at your house and even met the rest of your family. He played board games and even watched TV with them too and they all loved him. Everything was starting to fall into place. 

Even though Jeno had hurt you, it was all in the past now. After all, if it hadn't been for the stupid dare, you wouldn’t have met the boy you loved.       

[danieyells]

If you could, could you post Alan’s lines? I like him but he’s so stone cold at low affinity it’s hard to sus out his personality

SORRY THIS TOOK ME SO LONG ANON AND @otomelover23 so many things got in the way. . .mostly myself lol. . . .

Honestly that stone coldness is a big part of his personality. He's not great at expressing himself and he's very to the point. But as his affinity goes up, he's more. . .concerned for you. And he wants you around more, trusting himself to have you around more.

I posted all of them again this time! A lot of his have similar energy because of his stiffness, so I feel like being able to see them all helps to idk see the gradual change i think.

Default:

"Get your things. We're going."

"...What do you want?"

"Don't get involved with me."

"I'm going out. You guys get back to work."

"Get back. It's dangerous."

"Slack off once, and you'll find out how hard it is to get back in the game."

You've got mail:

"Some letters here for you."

Affinity 1:

"Oh, you're awake."

Affinity 2:

"I don't eat in the cafeteria. Portions aren't big enough. That's the only reason."

don't feel awkward in there or like people find you too intimidating to be near or anything? aren't worried about seeing Dante? if you say so.

Affinity 3:

"My wallet? Yeah, it's pretty beat up. Can't bring myself to chuck it though. Got some good memories with it."

reminds me of my brother, who kept our dad's old wallet. It's basically in tatters, held together by rubber bands, but sometimes what you have is what you have. . . .

Affinity 4:

"I'm going to the Pit. You should go back to your house, {PC}."

he doesn't want you to see him punch a man into oblivion.

Affinity 5:

"That sounds like a bike engine, but it's not one I know. ...Be right back."

INTRUDER ALERT INTRUDER ALERT INTRUDER ALERT much like Tohma he's probably pretty security conscious. Maybe he's more security conscious because Tohma isn't around. Or maybe he's not used to how Bonnie sounds yet.

Affinity 6:

"Was that class really revision...? I didn't think I missed that many..."

my boy is not book smart, he is fist smart and maybe street smart. please study with him. he needs flash cards. pretty sure the only reason he's passed any grade is because he goes on plenty of missions.

Affinity 7:

"Lunch? Huh. I forgot to eat. Guess I'll just grill some meat and have it with rice and miso soup. That's my go-to."

y'know what i'm glad someone here eats proper meals. even if you forget at least you're eating eventually!!!

Affinity 8:

"One of the Vagastrom guys asked me to add him on WickChat... Do you know how to do that?"

Affinity 9:

"I don't want to get anyone mixed up in my life."

He looks sad when he says this. . .he's really worried about how being close to him will affect others huh.

Affinity 10:

"Better sleep. Got an early day tomorrow."

Affinity 11:

"497... 498... 499... 500... Phew..."

don't mind pc they're just gonna watch you do 500 sit-ups/push-ups/pull-ups/whatever. . .no no they don't mind the sweat at all please continue--

Affinity 12:

"Bandana seems to disappear right around this time every day lately... What's he doing?"

this chat's between 11am and 4pm. . .pretty sure Sho would be busy with the food truck around that point. . .does Alan not know Sho runs a business lmao. . .I mean I guess Alan doesn't go into the more populous parts of Darkwick much.

Affinity 13:

"The first-years've each got their own strengths. Both can do stuff I can't."

Affinity 14:

"Bandana's got potential. He's quick, and he's strong. Rest comes down to motivation."

I think Sho's motivated, just motivated to do his own thing. Although I'm sure he'll develop more interest in the world and actions of the Institute and anomalies eventually. . .maybe. Or maybe Hyde's interest will keep him away lol.

Affinity 15:

"I'm heading out. Mission. Make sure you go to class. ...I'll let you know when I'm back."

alright mom i'll go to class gosh. does this feel like a headpat or forehead kiss line to anyone else? he just doesn't want you to worry about him. He knows he's doing something dangerous. But he promises he'll come home. He won't be reckless because you're waiting. Maybe I'm reading too much into it lol.

Affinity 16:

"Where am I...? Guess I should tell them I'm gonna be late. WickChat was this picture, wasn't it...?"

poor boy is so lost lmao please help him get where he needs to go. . .how does this man go on hikes in the mountains and shit. . . .

Affinity 17:

"You're still awake? Don't stay up too late."

Affinity 18:

"Oh, didn't see you there. I'm heading out for a run, but... Could you wait here for me?"

He wants to spend time with you, so please be waiting when he comes back. . . .

Affinity 19:

"I pat people on the head a lot? Didn't notice. I'm doing it again? ...Sorry."

IT'S HARD NOT TO WHEN PEOPLE ARE SO MUCH SHORTER THAN YOU also that wasn't a complaint please give them lots of pats :'3

Affinity 20:

"I'm taking some of the Vagastrom guys to the mountains today. ...You want to come too?"

CAMPING TRIP WITH DA BOIS!!!!!

Affinity 21:

"This one's all fixed up. I'm gonna take a shower. Wait there."

there like in the shower or--(he uses 底 which refers to someplace near the listener, so he just means 'where you're sitting' but still.)

Affinity 22:

"{PC}. Got time after this? A friend of mine gave me some fresh boar meat."

He wants to cook for you! He cooks in a very wilderness style, but still! He wants to share his bounty! He's showing you he can be a good provider. No, he didn't hunt it himself but good community connections are also important!

Affinity 23:

"You're you, not someone else. You're doing a good job. Hold your head high."

he doesn't want you to fall into a cycle of self-loathing or of trying to be anyone but yourself. Maybe what others do feels more impressive to you, but you aren't them and you can't compare yourself to them. Even if you're 'weak' in one way or another, you have your own worth in other ways. So be proud of yourself, instead of trying to get the pride of somebody else. I think he really cares about your mental wellbeing and he doesn't want you to lose yourself. Because he's lost himself--and he doesn't want that for you. Don't wallow in self-pity, don't agonize over the past. Be proud of how far you've come and walk your own path.

Affinity 24:

"Can't sleep? ...I'll take you for a drive. Quick run should help you reset."

Imagine falling asleep in his car and he has to figure out. . .does he wake you up, does he carry you somewhere. . .he could bring you back to your place but he doesn't know how to get there so. . .you wake up in his room, in his bed. . .does he have the understanding that "you probably shouldn't sleep in the same bed as somebody without them okaying it first" and he sets up his tent and sleeps in it or uses his sleeping bag or sleeps somewhere else in the dorm or maybe in his car. . .frankly even if he doesn't he'd be afraid of hurting you in his sleep. There's no way he'd sleep in the same bed as you. Maybe lie awake in there with you or something. But he'd be too scared of what harm he could cause to fall asleep.

Affinity 25(max):

"I'm lucky I've got you, {PC}. As long as you're with me, I feel like I won't lose sight of who I am."

HE SMILES WHEN HE SAYS THIS. 99% of his lines have his usual expression, but this one he really smiles and that's how you know how much he appreciates you. I feel like he kind of gave up on himself--he's a big, dangerous brute, he's not someone worth getting close to, it's dangerous to even want to. . .but you make him feel like maybe he has a chance again. You make him look in the mirror and see someone he hasn't seen in a long time, and he realizes that person is himself and he would have never seen the version of him who isn't dirtied with blood again without you.

Spring:

"Don't get lax just 'cause it's warm out. Stay focused."

"... Good camping weather."

"Oh, it's you. Must've dozed off. Better get back to work."

BABY IF YOU NEED A NAP JUST TAKE A NAP. . . .

"The cherry blossom illuminations? ...That kind of thing's not for me."

Summer:

"It's getting hot out. Make sure you stay hydrated."

"Looks like we've got another mission order. There's more anomalies out there in summer."

"The Pit's getting noisy. Those guys better not be pulling stupid shit again..."

LET LEO PLAY MUSIC IN THE PIT HE MISSES GOING TO THE CLUB.

"Sorry, didn't mean to scare you again... I was just going for a jog. Didn't think you'd be round this corner."

Alan turning a corner and slamming straight into you and being shocked aw--

Autumn:

"Good season for a workout. Want to join me?"

"...Maybe I'll go check out the fall leaves."

"The days are getting shorter. You should get home before it gets dark."

"...Long nights make me think about stuff I'd rather forget."

he killed dante in the autumn or winter. noted.

Winter:

"Cold out in the mornings lately. Guess I'll warm up with a coffee."

"The first-years ditched... What do they mean, "too cold"?"

"As long as you got some muscle, you can handle the cold."

i handle the cold well because i'm fat, myself. my brother, who's plenty muscular, gets cold much easier than i do U:

"It's freezing... Guess I'll break out the kerosene heater. Gotta make sure you ventilate if you use it indoors, but it works real fast. Can't do without it in winter."

His birthday:

"Whose birthday? ...Mine? Oh... Forgot all about it. ...Thanks."

Your birthday:

"Today's your birthday, yeah? ... Get your stuff. I'll take you for a drive."

New Years:

"You helped us out a lot last year. Hope you'll stick around."

Valentine's Day:

"This chocolate's for me? Do everything proper, don't you? Thanks. I appreciate it."

HE SMILED AGAIN. I wonder if he's ever been given valentine's chocolate before. Even if he thinks it's just out of obligation, I think he must be really happy. . . .

White Day:

"White Day's when you repay people for what they got you on Valentine's Day, right? Sorry if these aren't your thing... Didn't really know what you like..."

. . .my first thought was that i read that sometimes lingerie is given as a white day return present. . .and i just imagined that Alan asked what he was supposed to do if he liked the person he got a valentine's day gift from on valentine's and Leo saw an opportunity for chaos and said to get them some sexy white underwear and Alan just. . .believed him. And it's a very embarrassing moment for everyone involved. pc absolutely wears them when alan asks them out for things tho. waiting for the day alan finds out they're wearing it.

April Fool's Day:

"I'm actually a dog. Woof. ...Sorry, that was a lie. Forget I said anything."

he's a little confused but he's got the spirit.

Halloween:

"Saw an anomaly I'd never seen before just now. Ran away when I tried to stop it. That's when I realized it was a human."

i would not be surprised if his upbringing was sheltered and he just did not know about halloween to begin with haha

Christmas:

"...You should spend Christmas with family."

Well everyone's stuck at Darkwick so that's not likely to happen. Also don't tell that to Sho. . .but we can be family now! And spend Christmas together!

Idle:

"...You okay?"

"...You seem busy. Let me know if you need anything."

Absent:

"...You came back. You look all right. We're gonna need you for the next mission."

SO YOU SEE HE'S A LOT KINDER AND SWEETER WHEN HIS AFFINITY GETS UP THERE. . .BUT HE'S STILL COLD. BECAUSE HE'S AFRAID. . .but you make him feel more comfortable. You help him feel less like a destructive monster and more like a person. Where he pushed you away before, he keeps you closer now. Still a little at arm's distance but much closer than before. I HOPE THIS HELPED YOU SEE MORE OF HIS PERSONALITY, ANON o/

[agirlcandream84]

Frank castle w/ a Goth/Alt reader! tattoos, piercings, dark clothes and corsets/platforms the whole thing.

I think he would love a creepy partner with a bubbly sunshine personality ( most goth people do lol )

<33

Ommmggg I love this! Such a cute dynamic and one I wouldn't have thought of myself.

Boyfriend!Frank with a Goth!Reader

Maybe you're ignoring your alarm to get up but he knnoowwwwsss you'll wanna do your whole corset and makeup and that takes time so he's all "come on sweetheart, outta bed. You gotta get your things tied up the way you like" and he's helping you into it while you're still half asleep.

He's always telling you you're "gonna break your neck in those damn shoes" every time you come home with a new pair of platforms. He's only half right.

You've got about 80,000 liquid eyeliners laying around the house and he's got no clue what they are and you catch him trying to write something down with one grumbling "this fuckin' pen is a piece of shit" and you can barely keep from crying laughing.

When you first meet Frank you could tell he was some sort of tough guy but every time he talked to you he seemed sorta reserved but then months into your relationship Frank admits he was actually kinda scared of you at first because of your whole exterior before he got to know the real you.

One time on a scrap of paper you found a doodle Frank had made-- yes a doodle!!-- of an adorable chubby elephant, like a crude line drawing you learn in elementary school. This felt like finding a a rare artifact. You'd wager that no one else in the world could say that had a Frank Castle doodle so you did what felt like the most obvious thing-- get it tattooed on your hip. When Frank discovers it on you one night, he pauses and his fingers trace the outline of the familiar creature and you say "You like Frankie?" and the man is all misty-eyed and croaks out a "yeah, yeah I like. I like it a lot doll."

You're the first person ever in the history of time to get Frank to agree to paint his pinky nail black. Of course at first he was all "hell no sweetheart, I'm not into all that shit," but you're begging and begging and tell him it looks so hot on a guy and you're showing him pics for inspo and he finally agrees because he thinks you're so goddamn cute when you're passionate about something. When Curtis seems him he raises at an eyebrow at it but Frank shuts it down in a heartbeat with "fuckin' problem Curtis? S'for my girl," and Curtis just smirks and leaves it at that.

I hope I did it justice!

[gamerbearmira]

Prebby siren

No but seriously. Alma is objectively very pretty, even by siren standards.

I mean I've mentioned it before, sirens age very slowly after they reach adulthood. And despite her age, she is still consider to be a beautiful creature, by sirens and humans alike. Whether they like her or not, they can't deny she is beautiful.

I mean. Yeah, all sirens are beautiful. But Alma is slightly above that?? She takes very good care of her tail, and decorates it, and herself with pearls (which, in the underwater world is the equivalent to diamonds on land).

In siren communities, their face isn't just what's considered beautiful; it's also their tail. It plays a big part in it. Beauty standards do exist, but not for the face; it's for the tail. Visually appealing tails are always favored. Male or female, it doesn't matter Now, there isn't necessarily an "ugly" tail, not really. But it's a big thing in siren culture to care for your tail. And given how big siren families can be, family members will also help each other in that. Especially older members to younger members, specifically young sirens that haven't reached adulthood yet.

There are also decorations. It's not uncommon for a siren to decorate their tail with just about anything they can find that might make their tail visually appealing. Patterns play a big part, some sirens have them naturally (Mirabel, Camilo, Félix, etc.), and some don't have many, or have them at all (Alma, Julieta, Bruno, etc.). That's where decorations come in. Sentimentally, most sirens will keep their guppy shell and wear it in some way, typically around their tail or in their hair. Pearls are the most rare and are given or found mostly to bigger families who use more shells for guppies. Giant oysters and clams are more expensive than other shells. There are either decorations; seaweed, broken-off coral, seashells, and sometimes passive life like sea stars.

Like regular fish, and regular mermaids, giant sirens can experience fin rot/decay. 8 times out of 10, it's because they're sick, and will heal if treated properly, but in some instances, it's because they didn't care for their tail; which is very looked down upon. It's the same with guppies, they are taught from a young age that when they get their tail they have to care for it; and even as guppies, the fins they do have (on their legs), they're told to take care of, because yes, they can get fin rot, and a lot easier than you might think.

Idk I just wanted to talk about this au, do a lil lore drop lol

[starfxkr]

does tp!jj get sad or disappointed when reader wants to do something but he can't do it due to his age lol. i thought of this because you said he's too old for shower sex i mean i get what you mean they can still do it but at the same time they can't.

he gets huffy about it yeah because he hates feeling his age. in general he's very like active and he does a lot of shit he never quite sits down but he's also tired all the time and cant do the shit he used to which makes him feel bad because he's got this hot young thing that likes going out and he doesnt handle it well hence always finding a reason to keep her in the house.

[omgwhatchloe]

i am haunted by your sean's accurate recovery post how do you think it would have impacted how the gang treated him like how would they react to fun lovable sean macguire actually being so injured and weak to the point he couldn't keep that face up and needed help

ok so at first, when we have charles, javier and arthur, shock and denial. they would comment on his condition as they stared through the binoculars but not fully process yet what this means. when they cut him down and hes just laying there, it starts to dawn on them. something fucking awful has happened here. arthur would drag him up, only for him to crumble like dead weight with a few groans, then face the inevitable that that boy is not okay and they have a huge problem. cue them emptying their satchels for food and water asap. also theres the lingering, unspoken thought in their heads that he absolutely stinks but it would be super inappropriate to point it out.

back at camp, theyre so excited for seans return party. that he doesnt get. because when they see him, weak and slumped on the back of arthurs horse, bruised and bloody and stained, they begin to wonder…why did they expect something else? why did they expect a bouncy, happy, healthy and ready-to-party sean to return after weeks of torture? in what universe (the canon one lol) would that happen and make sense? theres no hugs and reunion. theres the yell of “i need some help over here.”

so seans in recovery, after finally being bathed (by who up to u), and hes not happy. theres no smiles. theres only pained groans and noises and people being ushered away from him, and the party is kind of a pity party. arthurs thinking about the fact he debated leaving him there, even journalling it, because he feels so guilty. lenny is wondering why the universe took jenny away from him and if theyre taking sean away from him too. karen feels lost, like she doesnt know how to help. everytime they hear miss grimshaw going to check on him, see lenny and hosea trying to help him walk on his burnt feet, see mr pearson cooking him separate meals so he can maybe attempt to eat as best he could, hear his panicked yelling as he wakes up from another nightmare, they are reminded about how low on their priority list he was during and after colter.

it feels like hes a different person, and they dont know if they’ll get old sean back. i mean, he needs help to walk, hes bruised all over from literally being beat and stamped on and needs help to sit up, he cannot eat what they eat, they hear him crying to lenny, and the majority of them do feel guilty.

however, there is one good night where he sits up and drinks with bill around the fire, who is so happy to see him up and able to drink with him that he isn’t snarky or rude. hes questioning and sympathetic..in his own way of course.

so yeah hope that little ramble does it for you!

[allied-mastercunt]

Allied, you just keep on giving me new material and ideas to work with.

Yandere A.M being a massive manipulative asshole whenever Book! Ted enters his R/Niceguys era to Reader.

Like, he’s just “comforting” Reader, knowing DAMN well he’s doing this shit on purpose. He’s just comforting Reader, coaxing them to vent… only to relay the information to Ted.

A.M: Your secret is safe with me :)

A.M five minutes later: And then they called you a cuck, me personally, I wouldn’t let that slide. But that’s just me, how are you feeling Ted?

Ted: *Fuming noises*

it's mary, actually lol

mary, elizabeth of nosferatu (rat for short).

but yeah, absolutely. an especially dangerous combo would be game!AM and book!Ted. game!AM is a fucking menace who would play both sides.

on one hand, he's on your side, after all, Ted is so terrible to you! AM is your only real friend, you can see that, right?

on the other hand, he's rooting for Ted, riling him up to be even more mad at you.

AM wants you both to be obsessed and co-dependent while also hating each other, he wants to know just how twisted he can make your relationship. it's fun!

and he gets you both to believe him, to open up to him, to view him as this... source of comfort... oh, he thrives in it.

[jigeuminunbich]

it’s the thought that counts | mark lee

synopsis in which your lovely boyfriend, mark, decides to make you breakfast, at least that was his intention.

genre fem!reader, nonidol!au, established relationship, slice of life, and fluff

warnings domestic, pet names (baby), and honestly just mark (making an attempt at) cooking lol

word count 1k

a/n in honor of the new dream x dream episode aka marksung bumbling in the kitchen for our entertainment :D

i.

Sundays were the designated days for you and Mark to relax. Sleep in, laze around, ignore any other human contact, you name it— Sundays were for those exact reasons. With every week after the other coming with some version of turmoil for the both of you, it was owed that you just had a day squared off where you could just be.

Though, you found in your time on this Earth that life had its skilled ways of disrupting your peace. And sometimes it liked to use your ever so lovely boyfriend, Mark, as a pawn in its schemes.

The familiar, unwelcome smell of what you could simply put as burnt wafted into your nostrils, leaving your serene sleep to be quickly interrupted as the stench violently awoke all your senses.

“Mark!”

As if you had been in this exact predicament before, your comforter was flipped off of your once warm and comfortable body. You quickly became acquainted with the unpleasant change in warmth, your drive to figure out why it smelled like a bonfire was taking place in your apartment outweighing your want to be cozy in your covers again.

“Heyyy…” Mark greeted you with an uneasy smile, pausing in his ministrations of fanning away the smoke that emitted from your stove.

“What do you think you’re doing?” Still practically half-asleep, your voice comes off more brash than you intend. The squinting of your eyes from the sharp change in light did nothing to help your case— you must’ve looked and sounded like a dead girl walking.

On reflex, Mark scratches the back of his nape as he gazes down at the problem he’s caused. “I thought I’d wake up a lil’ earlier and cook us some breakfast but—uh— as you can see…”

“Not going too well?” Your eyebrow quirks.

The paper plate Mark was using to disperse the smoke met the counter ahead of him with a pathetic smack, his hands coming to join it as he braced himself against the granite. “Yeah. Sorry to wake you like this… I just wanted to do something different—”

Your features softened at Mark’s clear frustration. It never took much to have Mark back in your good graces. He was just too genuine and honest that you couldn’t help but have your hostility dissipate. “It’s okay, babe. I appreciate the effort— oh wow—!”

The reality of the situation fully settled with you as you gravitated closer to Mark. Charred bacon that nearly melded to the pan of the same color and strewn sunny-side up eggs being the culprits of the unusual start to your day.

“Mark, how can you possibly mess up eggs this badly?” Instinctively, your hand moves forward to push around the sloppy eggs with the spatula that sat with them.

“I don’t know!” His whine comes out muffled from the act of Mark rubbing his hands over his face discontentedly.

“Here,” you bumped your hip into his own, signaling for him to step out of the way and to allow you to stand where he once did.

Your immediate instinct was to rid Mark’s rendition of breakfast into the garbage before stopping by your fridge to gather the ingredients for round two. Now, fully awake, you stood opposite of your stove rhythmically cracking eggs and frying bacon that you were sure to keep a close eye on.

Mark, after watching you gracefully glide around the kitchen, comes to wrap his arms around your waist with his head landing in its rightful spot on your shoulder. You shudder, with his nose and lips brushing against the junction of your neck.

“How did I get so lucky?” Your actions falter for a moment when a brief kiss is pressed to your soft skin and you force yourself to bite back a smile. Refusing to let this situation get too far away from him just yet, you speak through the fluster your boyfriend has brought upon you.

“The universe knew you needed a decent cook to balance out the fact you should never step foot in a kitchen, ever.”

Light laughter shudders through your body as you can basically picture Mark’s offended expression towards you, you try your best to keep your focus on the stove opposite of you as he leans away from your body in disbelief.

“C’mon, I didn’t do that bad!” Mark insists, a whiny twinge in his voice.

“Oh, I’m sorry. Were you intending on serving me bacon or charcoal?” You deliver a blow, momentarily drawing your attention away from the food to gage his reaction. A snort ripples through your chest at his unenthusiastic response to you, his eyes cutting into thin lines.

“Ha ha, very funny,” he sneers, constricting you closer to him as your punishment. “I was intending on make my beautiful girlfriend some breakfast. Isn’t that enough?”

You hum, becoming nearly pudding in your boyfriend’s hold. “I love you, baby. But, unfortunately, it is not.”

Mark sighs, pulling his best pout as his grip loosened on your waist. “Fine, fine. I’ll leave you be, then…”

“Good. I don’t want your lack of talent in the kitchen rubbing off on me.” Assuming you’ve had the final word, you turn your attention back to the food again— giggling to yourself as you can feel Mark’s eyes burning into you once again.

Mark takes advantage of the fact you’re distracted and tickles right under your arms. Leaving you to jolt and burst into immediate laughter that pulls straight from your stomach.

“Mark!” You whirl around and smack against his chest.

He laughs along with you, holding your flailing wrists back from further thwacking him. “You were saying?”

“That you’re a wonderful cook?”

“That’s what I thought.” Mark graces you with a peck on the cheek before finally giving you the space to pick up where he abruptly left off, backing up to the refrigerator to rifle through it.

“Did you want coffee or tea? Oh shoot, I forgot we got orange juice too…”

You ponder for a moment, skillfully flipping slices of bacon. “Coffee is fine.”

“Alright, one cup of coffee coming right up,” Mark announces before humming to a random song as he enthusiastically began making your order.

As you inevitably smile and giggle at your boyfriend, you suddenly feel grateful for the uninvited start to your morning and grateful for the universe’s (& Mark’s) unprecedented ways.

anotha a/n:

this is 100% what this was inspired by (i only have the barbie and ken vers lmao) BUT YEAH

© jigueminunbich 2024

[thesunfyre4446]

Hi, love your blog.

I wanted to ask what are your predictions regarding the second season of HotD? We saw the trailer and having in mind all the theories, "leaks" and most of all, season 1 and some of the decisions the writers had made, I must admit I'm not very optimistic. Also, some of the scenes in the trailer made me think about it more, e. g. what if Alicent continues to somehow justify Rhaenyra and behave like she did in episodes 8 and 9, as in, being disappointed with her children, pining for Rhaenyra (not necessarily in a romantic way, I for one never saw anything romantic between them, but still) and regretting her decision to make Aegon king. Idk, it could really sour her character to me, even though she was one of my favourites. Another thing is that nude Aemond scene because I'm pretty sure that's with the brothel madame from ep 9 and I hate it. Especially if somehow the reason turns out to be Luke's death and he needs the comfort of an older, motherlike figure (the same woman who basically SAed him if we go by that scene with her in s1) because his own mother berated him. It would be too weird and distasteful. Finally, there are rumours about Dyanna being the one to help Mysaria with b&c, Rhaena getting Nettles storyline, Rhaenyra becoming Visenya... Finally, 9ne3 of the things I really want to see is a complex, but ultimately strong relationship between Aegon and Aemond, but I dare not hope.

As you can see, I may be a bit dramatic but I really don't have a good feeling lol. Anyway, thanks in advance for your answer

first of all, i'm so sorry for taking forever to answer !!! my inbox is very overwhelming for me at the moment...

ummmm yeah wrt to alicent, the trailers do make it seem like she's against the violence and the war, but ali has always been against murder and violence so that's not surprising. i do think that because they're trying to keep b&c as this big plot twist we haven't seen post-b&c alicent yet. so we'll have to wait and see.

wrt to aemond and the brothel scene... i think it was confirmed that this was the madam from s1? i'm also very uncomfortable with this... just... no.

if they'll try to frame b&c as this gurlboss moment i will scream and rage. helaena and her kids never did anything to deserve this. the rhaena and nettles situation - if it's true, then actually fuck this show. nettles and rhaena have absolutely nothing in common. NOTHING. and if y'all can find me ONE thing that they have in common i will go back on my words.

we'll just have to wait and see anon!