#can’t believe I used to think I was cis lmao

[trans-androgyne]

so are you saying that you don’t think that cis men have power and privilege over cis women? or are you just arguing that trans men are never seen/treated as men and trans women are never seen/treated as women? because you can’t believe that the patriarchy and sexism exists but also believe that there is no difference in power whatsoever between trans men and trans women. transphobia doesn’t affect us equally when sexism doesn’t affect all genders equally.

No I’m not saying any of that lmao. I am arguing that not all trans people pass and we can’t just pretend they all do when talking about privilege and give a big fuck-you to everyone who doesn’t fit into that. I know plenty of trans men and mascs who present exactly like women full time for one reason or another. Where is their male privilege? Of course there are people who pass and benefit from conditional privileges; you can see this reflected in certain domains, like how trans men on average get paid less than cis people but higher than trans women. But people focus only on aspects where passing transmascs get privilege, ignore non-passing transmascs, and ignore the domains where we have things harder than transfems. We have higher suicide rates. We have higher rates of sexual assault. Abortion issues affect our bodies directly. I’m off T not by choice right now due specifically to its controlled substance status. We’re understudied and under supported. You will never have a solid grasp on trans oppression if your only move is to copy + paste from cisfeminism and tack “trans” onto the front. Things are more complicated than that. Trans folks are not always seen as men or women at all but either some twisted version of those, a failed gender freak, or a degendered subhuman creature. Begging you to shape your transfeminism on the actual experiences of trans people

[neopuppy]

Who do you think it's the nastiest in nct? (in a sexual way ofc)

I feel like both jaemin and jaehyun give off some perturbing vibes, i love jeno, specially fanfic jeno ( I'm joking hahaha), but he screams very nice to me , just like Johnny, i mean they can be nasty but it's not in a perturbed way idk if you get me

I think I’ve said this before but I think nearly all of them would be such a disappointment irl lmao. thats why fanfics cool, bc its not likely we’ll ever fuck any of them to find out anyway, and even if we did….. most of them probably wouldn’t live up to the fantasy in our minds idk

(like for example: the way czennies like to convince themselves that Judy must be fucking someone…..meanwhile she on here reading my Jeno fics like the rest of you🤷🏻‍♀️ idk if I had the real thing….why would I be reading abt the fictional one!!! but thats my opinion😬)

if I had to say who’s ever implied they could get nasty nasty it’s probably Taeyong or Ten, but I don’t wanna think about TY fucking and Ten……nctzens have really ruined my ability to fangirl for him. they try to do this with my other biases, like as far as twitters concerned Jeno’s a flaming homosexual baby girl, and he could be who knows! but as a heterosexual cis gendered woman……I’m looking at men who have never discussed their sexual preferences with us as fans and sell us a fantasy and going with that. so. its hard though when it feels like a major part of the fandom are very abrasive with their opinions that are bible according to them……I guess Jeno personally told them all that he lets Jaemin top him idk idk🤨

I don’t think Johnny would be nasty persay BUT I think he’d be one of the least awkward/more passionate and accommodating? like he’d make you feel the most comfortable and dare I say…..talk you through it😮‍💨 I’m sure he could get nastyish tho, but I see him as very ~gentle giant~ in reality, he’s a little too good at that sweet easy going persona for me to not believe it’s not partially true. STILL…….MY FICTIONAL JOHNNY LAYS PIPE DOWNNNN, breeding kink, daddy kink, and medium dom bc he can go soft or hard with you😗 this has a lot to do with maturity as I do see him as one of the more level headed and mature members, but also I’m kind of extreme delusional abt Johnny so……

I think Jaemin would be an absolute dud in bed, sorry guys ,!:&&,/‘amzmmamxmx he gives boring, not freaky, and like…..traditional. he prob hits two positions at most. a shame bc my fictional Jaemin…….he’s wild.

dare I say………Jeno’s probably a lover, he’s so soft I can’tttttttt. BUT I know there’s a beast there, and his stamina’s definitely crazy, I do think he likes some emotional sex though, but…..whatever😅

idk who else could be freaky, I feel like the fandom leans to painting Taeyong/Yuta/Ten that way since they experiment more with their looks(understandable, as a goth thot stereotype myself). ultimately it’s more about what their partners comfortable with. not everyone’s into getting nasty……can’t relate, but hey we’ll always have fanfic🤝💚

[transexualpirate]

You spend your time here fighting terfs, and sometimes you can’t even respond with a proper argument lol. Focus on the MEN that end the lives of trans people like you they are more important I suppose terfs might disagree with you and so do I but they don’t kill you. I’m beginning to believe the only reason misogyny exist from trans people and cis men towards women is because women don’t kill and commit atrocities it’s seen and weak easy to “bully” perhaps or maybe im just deranged. Do feminist have to start treat you like men do? Since the lack of respect of VERY apparent internet wide.

omg i love your username!!!!!!!

anyways lmao im not actually too worried about changing a transphobe's mind, hence why sometimes my "argument" is literally just trolling because i think it's funny lol but if you think the only people i debate are radfems and never transphobic men you haven't dug deep enough in my blog. it's mostly terfs because theres an epidemic of them in this hellsite but i just hate transphobes in general lolll

also it's funny how you phrased it as though women are capable of no harm and it's only the men committing hate crimes against trans people. i mean obv the statistics show that cis men are far more violent but i assure you they're not the only ones. it ranges from women actually committing hate crimes themselves to transphobic assholes like nikolas ferreira using "the feminists are on my side!" as an argument for why it's totally acceptable to film a minor in a bathroom as long as she's trans. i mean the first time i experienced transphobia irl it was a grown cis woman telling me i was disgusting, should be ashamed of myself and should stay away from my friends to not "contaminate" them because she found out i was questioning whether i was trans or not when i was 12. so like. instead of lecturing a random trans person online about what you think is the Correct and Unproblematic way of dealing with transphobia, why don't you try to make it so i don't have to deal with it in the first place lmao

tldr as long as im not hurting anyone ill fight transphobia whatever way i think works better since im the one actually getting affected by it <3

[nosolaceofastraightanswer]

happy pride month!!!! anyway tua pride headcanons cus i want to lol :P *note- i do not identity with all of these labels. i cannot give you a personal experience or defense for these. if i include any harmful stereotypes, lmk. it’s pride month and queer people are valid*

quick overview, analysis below the readmore

luther- he/him cishet

diego- he/him cis and bicurious

allison- she/her cishet

klaus- he/she (they sometimes) genderqueer/enby, pansexual

five- they/he gay and ace. agender.

ben- he/him cishet

viktor- he/they transmasc lesbian

for some i used the canonical pronouns as to not confuse before i get the explanation. <33333

luther- to me he’s like a cishet guy honestly. i still love the pride hc’s other people have, bc most of the time they’re really good. i just prefer this reading, espec. with sloane (QUEEN!!!!). i also don’t like the s1 era fics where everyone hated luther (almost entirely unjustified) so they would make him be a dick to klaus and stuff. like did he drink reggie’s kool aid? yes. but is he homophobic? no. i think a better example in a canonical kid fic of him saying mean things to klaus for plot would be like,, making fun of him for being a druggie or lazy, because that’s stuff that reginald would actually encourage him to say. rant over lmao that just has always bothered me.

diego- honestly this one is back and forth for me, between bisexual and straight. like him and lila being bi4bi is just too fucking amazing, but he does give off straight guy energy sometimes so i’ll put it at a bi-curious. he’s def an ally though, and i can imagine he would do his best to get over his fear of needles to help v with his t shots, or defend klaus from homophobic assholes. although i personally hc him as cis, the transmasc diego people have their fucking shit together because that HITS DIFFERENT. i think done right, it adds so much to his character in AU’s and stuff and it’s just rly cute!! but bisexual diego is a very fanon thing that i like to see.

allison- i think probably straight and cis once again. she seems very comfy and happy in her femininity and gender, and her with ray??? (sidenote almond as a ship name makes me lose it ITS SO CUTE). i think she’s always been a big ally to klaus. i can also see her as pan or bi, but pressured to appear as straight by the constant eyes on her since she was like ten. i mean not only was she the only girl, but also a black girl? she was 100% so insecure during her childhood because people were constantly critiquing her. so honestly i don’t think it would be too out of the ordinary to hc her as queer.

klaus- i mean, we all know this one. as far as i know he has been canonically (though not mentioned in show, more like an interview or something) pansexual and non-binary. if not then it’s VERY FANON. directly through the show, we see his attraction to men through dave and also his enjoyment of more feminine clothes and makeup and things like that. i hc him as genderqueer and just generally chilling out and not really caring too much about labels. like a “i’ll fuck you if you’re hot” kind of attitude.

five- now this one might get me some weirdness, but i don’t see five as a cishet man for my hc’ing purposes. a common fanon opinion is that he’s asexual, which i totally like. i also think he’s gay. i guess that would be homoromantic? and also agender. he said no. no. MEN. i think that any romantic hc that does not acknowledge delores is not doing it right, bc holy shit delores is so fucking important to the understanding of his character!!!!! i believe in the interpretation that delores is himself, but a separated part that he forced himself to view as a separate entity to survive the apocalypse. he kind of fucking tricked himself into loving himself, though unfortunately as many people have pointed out, he doesn’t see himself as capable of good. he doesn’t see that delores is him- he can’t. he was down bad though for his mannequin apocalypse wife okay??? they were in love fuck you???? idk sexuality is fluid. let this old man live his life. he’s so tired. also agender, i think they don’t like being called a boy (possibly childhood trauma, possibly gender) but still is okay with “old man”.

ben- he is the token cishet of the upper numbers trio ( 567 icons real and true ). the jennifer incident was heavily implied if not directly and canonically stated to be a romantic issue, and also him and jill!!!! yes it was weird but it was so cute. bring back umbrella ben istg idc about the themes you messed them up in s3 anyway. i would talk more about him BUT HE NEVER GOT ENOUGH FUCKING SCREENTIME EVER AND THE THEMES THE THEMES HIS CHARACTER THEY DIDN- gets shot

viktor- canonically transmasc, canonically a woman enjoyer, ten out of ten character. i love looking at s1 era fics where people would be like. there is no way this guy doesn’t like women. *lesbian headcanons*. and elliot page just slaying with the queer rep season after season. i think he/they pronouns for viktor is really good and i like it :)). also some people hc them as bi because of harold (or for weird reasons but we don’t talk about that-) but i think it’s more of a lesbian thing personally. now. don’t come after me i’m not looking for he/him lesbian discourse on my pride month fandom post. AND FURTHERMORE elliot page is a king and he doesn’t deserve in any way the crazy hate he gets for being trans. trans men are men, trans ppl are valid etc. that being said, i hc him as a he/they lesbian. RESPECTFULLY. i imagine there were a lot of complicated factors while he was coming out and realizing things about themself. i think the harold thing was wanting to be wanted and loved more that actually wanting or loving, and you know we all gotta have that spicy *heteronormativity* woohoo.

bonus LILA (queen)- bisexual!! also she/they hc’s are valid asf for that. we love a queen who can do both. not sure if this is partial or full canon, or just heavy fandom but idc.

okay byyeeee happy pride month and also have a good juneteenth. black lives matter!!!!!

[horizon-verizon]

At least, Cersei is the one to refuse to go public with their incestous relationship and isn’t out there proposing to marry Myrcella to Tommen, unlike Saint Jaime who call his sister ‘queen of whores’, treat her as his property, and victim-blame her (I tell you, he [Robert] loves me not/And whose fault is that, sweet sister ?), and never spare a thought for Tysha (or Bran for that matter), but thats normal, its because he’s a feminist and teenage girl-coded. No wonder he has some sympathy for Criston Cole, lmao. Do people genuinely believes Jaime is a victim of patriarchy and that his gender doesn’t favor him over Cersei ?? Insane. Can’t wait for him to die. It’s 2023, Jaime isn’t Adam and Cersei isn’t Eve, dude is a misogynistic, racist and hyperprivileged white man and his father’s golden boy. Funny how you all talk like Green/Criston’s stans when it comes to Cersei and Jaime.

*EDITED POST* (9/21/23)

Probably from this recent post that itself has 3 links to other posts where I talk about Cersei as a character.

Um...when did I ever either imply or directly say that Jaime was "a victim of patriarchy and that his gender doesn’t favor him over Cersei"? Or express that he was better than his sister, morally? Or express that Cersei deserved to die more than he did?

Perhaps you have that impression because I never talked about Jaime exclusively once, or you're just going off of what you recently read and horribly misinterpreted the purpose and argument of that post. If the latter, I advise you to reread. If the first, I don't write about Jaime much simply because he doesn't interest me as much as Cersei or Tyrion, no one asked me my thoughts about him, and I'm not thinking of him apart from his relationship with Cersei or Tyrion. His knighthood and masculinity are...not "easy", but direct enough for me to not dwell as much as his other siblings' issues. (look to this post by blankwhiteshield about Jaime) I generally care more about women, children, and other marginalized people in fiction, even when I do sympathize with some white cis straight men some of the time.

I mean pre-Brienne Jaime. That's just how GRRm wrote his arc.

For me, blankwhiteshield's posts about Jaime HERE and HERE both suffice to give me a picture of who Jaime is bc they fill in some blanks I had in my pre-existing assessment of Jaime. Which actually wasn't favorable, anon. I find Jaime to actually be very annoying, and no, I do not think that he is Cersei's victim. He is deluded in some ways as much as her and is not a good person because of the abuse and emotional neglect they all get from Tywin/Westerosi society. I actually should have, since again, there were blanks. You can take a look at those links as well.

Look, Cersei is evil & abusive AS WELL AS a victim of domestic abuse woman & of misogyny since childhood. These are not mutually exclusive nor does it NOT mean that her domestic abuse only and directly caused her power-hungriness and need to control if not every, most aspect of her life and those she sees will help her get or maintain control and a good image of herself. Neither the abuse nor misogyny against her erases the fact that she develops hatred towards women, going so far as to violently and sexually objectify them like w/Taena. (Her using what she's observed men do to affirm power and copying it). Or that she pinched her baby brother's penis at a very young age, showing her classist and blase willingness to target children/one of the most vulnerable groups for her own sense of control over her husband, family, etc., and political power. She is also very willing to sacrifice/risk the entire city for her own control of power, similar to Aerys II. Cersei is complicated and there is nuance to her character, but she is unmistakably evil simultaneously. What I like about her or what I find compelling about her (if you haven't read the post about it) is that I can understand her motivations, and relate in some ways, and from practically babyhood she's been trying to be essentially "good enough" and perfect through external, social values of competency BUT also as someone has said: her need for perfection and power and total love comes across as pure in its own sort of twisted way. Her emotions are so intense and uncontrolled and she remains totally unaware of her loneliness that she comes across as childlike.

I also find it very funny how you're criticizing show!Rhaenyra for wanting to marry Jace to Helaena (I presume, you don't specify but that is the closest betrothal to the one you make b/t Myrcella and Tommen) when you say: "At least, Cersei is the one to refuse to go public with their incestous relationship and isn’t out there proposing to marry Myrcella to Tommen". Because while this would have done nothing to assuage Alicent--which was what Rhaenyra was trying to do--it was also not that bad of a deal for Helaena or Jace themselves. I personally dislike it bc, again, we're erasing Rhaenyra's relationship w/Laena and how she ever made it so that Jace married Laena's daughter...but I digress. OR you probably were referring to Jaime expressing the desire to go public with their relationship, that conversation? Again, what does this have to do with my argument in the post I recently posted and that I assume you're responding to?

[thebookishbruja]

I've never watched Heartstopper, so in that sense, I don't go here. But in the sense that I am a bisexual with opinions, I do go here. (I saw that they forced that boy to out himself as bisexual and I have thoughts.)

I just think it's highly ironic that people have taken the inclusive, positive (as in, do something actively to add to the world) concept of 'Own Voices' and made it exclusive, negative (take away stories, police people's identities), and then used it for clout, pretending that they have any moral authority.

LMAO THAT'S ABSURD. YOU ARE ABSURD.

The entire point of 'Own Voices', and having people tell their own stories is to bring more people into the fold. It is to prevent the all too common bullshit of studios and publishing companies and powerful straight white men, of benefiting from marginalized communities while at the same time, leaving them out in the cold.

The point of Own Voices is to put a stop to the common Hollywood phenomenon of "oh look at that brave straight man willing to debase himself and play gay for a role" and lauding him with awards. Meanwhile gay men can't even get in the door because 'you're too femme' or 'no one will believe you as a straight man.'

The point of Own Voices is to address the fact that there are a ton of unemployed trans people because 'we don't know what to do with you' and 'we don't think you are versatile enough to play cis people' or 'we don't need any 'niche' writers, thank you' meanwhile they've got cis people picking up Oscars for the 'brave incredible' act of pretending to be trans for a few months. It's having people lining up to suck you off because 'oh look how much you care about those people' but in real life, they wouldn't piss on them if they were on fire.

The issue is, the vast unemployment problem for visibly queer people, and then, us having to watch the people who exclude them parade around acting like their savior.

The answer is always…if the money is flowing, you need to make sure little dams are not being built to keep it from flowing to the communities you are profiting from.

The solution is to make sure marginalized people are in the room in positions of influence, so that the characters aren't mocked. To make sure the stories are told in an authentic manner.

If you are telling queer stories and you haven't got any queer people on the project? That's a problem. If you are making money off communities and excluding them? That's a problem.

Own Voices is a principle that targets the capitalist element of producing art. It looks at the people who fund the project. It takes into account makeup of the project over all. It makes sure that the capital is flowing to the places it is benefiting from.

IT IS NOT an exclusionary principle of 'you have to be of that exact queer identity in order to depict that queer identity'. That's literally absurd. It inhibits empathy. It restricts storytelling. And, it goes in the dead opposite direction of where we want to go!!

AND it is actively homophobic and destructive and malicious, because it leads to policing people's identities. It leads to outing people. It leads to reductive, predatory, behavior, it leads to harassment. And for bisexual people, it creates this constant hostile environment of we cannot just be. We cannot just exist. We have to keep proving ourselves.

I remember when I told one of my friends that I was bisexual. (I talked about this in my day of bi visibility post) She told me she didn't believe me. That all girls like to kiss girls for boys attention and for fun. She told me when I ate pussy, she'd believe me. (lmaooooosob I know!) And this is a common common common attitude towards bisexual people. "I don't believe you. Perform a sex act." PEOPLE I'M NOT KIDDING THIS IS ABSURDLY AWFUL AND HORRIBLE AND YES SOMETIMES FEELS DARKLY COMEDIC BUT IT IS SO HARMFUL AND IT IS SO COMMON. STOP IT.

Now, is there nuance to the question of casting queer people in queer roles? Yes. Of course. As a feminist I would be remiss to not mention trans women. (actual feminists give a fuck about all women not just cis women, just, you know, for the record) For example, with trans women, the most overbearing stereotype of trans women is that they are men in disguise. There are quite literally legal defenses that are built on it that have (and continue to allow) men to murder trans women and escape punishment in America. That they are just men under women's clothes, tricking you. Waiting to spring the truth on you. They are literally murdered behind this vicious bigotry. When you have a cis man playing a trans woman, you risk feeding into that stereotype.

Now. There is more nuance on top of that. If the project involves trans people, trans women are writing it, is it well done, is it humanizing? It may have value! But people also aren't obligated to feel overjoyed about it either. People are allowed to point out that connection and to prefer to see a trans woman in a trans woman role.

BUT THERE IS LITERALLY NO NUANCE ANYWHERE that allows you to take this concept of own voices, and use it to say "you must always be x to portray/write x or we will harass you." THERE IS NO EXPLANATION ANYWHERE that allows you to require people to 'prove' their identities to you. There is LITERALLY NO WIGGLE ROOM for you to demand people to perform sexual or romantic acts for you to 'prove' who they are. That is disgusting. And it is actively hostile to bisexual people.

And when you fix your fingers to get on twitter and say that a boy (HE IS BARELY 18) is APPROPRIATING queer identity because he hasn't fucked a dude for you on camera, I mean lol you don't give a fuck about queer people. STFU lmaooo. You don't look like Marsha P Johnson, you don't look like Harvey Milk. You look like a petty, small minded little asshole with too much time on their hands, trying to get clout on the internet. (I also suspect there is some horny fetishizing behavior at play there because people want to watch him kiss other boys. This is the whole....please understand the difference between fiction and reality. Enjoy fictional queer relationships all you want. Find men hot together all you want. But do not treat REAL LIFE ACTUAL men and boys like they are your little performing dolls ffs. Gross, people. Gross!!)

Anyway,

YOU DO NOT HAVE TO BE QUEER TO PLAY QUEER. We can demand broad and consistently inclusive projects, AND not be utter assholes and police people's identities. I promise you. We can. In fact, it is perfectly logical, consistent and normal. We can include gay men and bisexual men in projects that depict them, without bullying children. I promise you that. It's easy. It's simple as pie my dears.

And if you get online and use the language of social justice to be a heinous little bully, I hope you know everyone else can see you for what you are. No one thinks you're smart or that you care about social justice. You're just a clout chasing asshole and you need to stop.

[goldnhalos]

𝕀ℕ𝕋ℝ𝕆𝔻𝕌ℂ𝕀ℕ𝔾: 𝕊𝔸ℕ𝕋𝕀 𝔽𝕃𝕆ℝ𝔼𝕊.

hello everyone ! my name's fox, (she/they, 25, brt.) and i'm so excited to be here ! i haven't joined a group in... i want to say like a year and a half ? maybe two ? so pls be patient with me while i get my grind back lmao. this is santi, he's a mix and match of some old characters i have, i hope u all enjoy him ! i'll be posting a plotting call on the discord server soon but if you wanna hmu there and start plotting already, my handle is aslutforpainandsuffering

* ◟ : 〔 pedro pascal, cis man + he/him 〕 santiago flores , some say you’re a forty-five year old lost soul among the neon lights. known for being both gentle and guarded, one can’t help but think of riders on the storm by the doors when you walk by. are you still an active assassin for red eye, even with your reputation as the arcane? i think we’ll be seeing more of you and bruised knuckles. a pile of unread letters thrown across the floor. a broken whiskey bottle, although we can’t help but think of oliver marks ( if we were villains ) + matthew prior ( gallant ) + jackson healy ( the nice guys ) whenever we see you down these rainy streets.

tw: violence ; torture ; suicide ; drug / alcohol abuse ;

. * basics !

full name: santiago flores.

known as: santi ; mr. flores.

age + birthday: forty-five ; july 10th.

birthplace: unknown.

gender + pronouns: cis male ; he/him.

sexuality: bisexual.

occupation: assassin.

fc: pedro pascal.

spoken languages: english ; spanish.

tropes: bad liar, trauma conga line, unconscientious objector, butt-monkey.

phisical atributes: 5 ft 11" (1.80m); lean built ; no tattos ; several scars ; scraggily beard.

. * early days !

the only memory santiago has of his family is os his siblings running through a green pasture; he can remember the soft feeling of his mother's lap underneath his cheek, and the way her fingers ran through his hair. the sound of little children laughing haunts his dreams, but there's not a single face in sight. the people in his memory are nothing but blurred sillouettes, ghosts of people he once knew, of the child he once was. the orphanage, though, of that his memories are crystal clear: the beating, the fear, the hope that somebody would come and rescue him, and then the subsequently disapointment once he grew old enough to understand that nobody would. and then, nanuvut. the cold was somehow worse than the beatings, worse than the physical training that took and took and took from him until santi was nothing but a shell of the smiley kid he'd once been. killing is all that he knows, but santiago has never been at peace with it. he's familiar with death, has given it his entire life and soul, but it has never been something he enjoyed, something he got used to it. despite all the training, his handlers have never been able to supress his kind soul and gentle ways— nature vs. nurture, santiago being the living proof that there are some things nothing can ever truly change. all he wants is some peace and quiet, a life away from all of the decay and violence; a herb garden far away from the city, a sunlit kitchen and a big library to ruffle through. his dreams of tranquility have yet to come: when all you know is the underbelly of chaos, the rotten people and monsters, no other place feels like home.

. * recent years !

santiago tried leaving; at twenty-three, he tried to hang up his guns and become a regular, law-abiding citizen. and he didsurprisingly well. santiago went as far as graduating college, a major in psychology, and those were the best four years of his life. he partied, and he fell in love, and for the first time since he could remember, santi felt truly free. like he could finally be himself, like the blood on his hands had finally washed away. he settled down, and married a nice girl. his dreams of a suburbia life iwth white picket fences and a big slobbering dog were so close to become a reality he could barely believe it. a month after his marriage, another operative showed up. the operative -- probably a mercenary, santiago figured -- destroyed his home, tied his doe-eyed wife to a chair and ripped every single one of her nail before he got home from work. the message was clear: he was to return willingly to the red eye and fufill his purpose, or they would force his hand and the punishments for it would be devastating. his wife survived, but the trauma was too much. it ruined their marriage faster than anything else ever could, and santiago saw no other option but to return to his handlers with his tail between his legs. the corporeal punishments and risky missions were nothing compared to the feeling of falure, and santiago found solace in drowning himself in liquor, white lines and all sorts of chemicals that he could get his hands on. it started to affect his job, and santiago got slippery. more than once, the organization had to step in to prevent him from going to jail. considering his large death toll, santiago was giving a single chance: if he didn't get his act cleaned up, he could be terminated. as it turned out, santiago's destructive behavior was meant as self-sabotage, not as suicidal tendencies, and his self-preservation instincts took over. after a hellish period of going in and out of rehab, santiago has been somewhat clean; he hasn't exactly dropped the alcohol, though his black outs have stopped getting in the way of his work, and he's gone cold turkey on any narcotics. a functioning alcoholic, a friend called him once. it was good enough for the red eye, in the end.

. * wanted connections !

a best friend ; the only person in the world that santi trusts. he's not one to give himself lighty, but this person has proven time and time again that they're his ride or die. ( 0 / 1 )

an old friend ; someone that was in the orphanage with him. maybe they get along, maybe they hate each other, this dynamic can be played in any sort of way. ( 0 / ?? )

friends of all kinds ; santiago can be kind of closed off, but as it turns out he can be quite friendly once you push through that, so he probably gets along with this person pretty well. ( 0 / ?? )

an ex ; ever since his marriage, santi has big issues with commitment. in his life of work, he knows having a partner is a weaklink, something people can use against you. they cared for each other deeply, but once things got started to get serious, santiago jumped ship, probably in the worst way possible. ( 0 / 1 )

a protegé ; there's something about this person that just makes santiago's instincts bubble up. it's someone he'd kill and die to protect, and has been working on teaching them as many of his own skills as he possibly can. bonus points if this is someone that can handle their own better than he ever could, but he insists that they need help anyways. ( 0 / 1 )

the enemy ; santiago has made many enemies along the way ; he's quite blunt, and despite not enjoying violence, he does resort to it whenever needed. they've probably come blow to blow at some point before, and it doesn't get better. ( 0 / 1 )

the bad influence ; santiago's a very strict, logical person. he doesn't do things on whims, and certainly doesn't partake in reckless behavior very often. this is someone with whom santi's first instinct is to be “well, what the hell!” and he’ll do things he normally wouldn’t, be that go to a rave late at night, do the hard drugs he's supposedly given up years ago or just eat that greasy bacon cheeseburger that might give him a heart attack. ( 0 / 1 )

the protective friend ; there’s nothing santiago doest best than taking care of people. in return, no one really takes care of him. except for this person, who’s there for him when he breaks down, who would go head first into a bar fight to watch his six and just doesn’t fuck around when it comes to calling santiago out on his bullshit. ( 0 / 1 )

[wndaswife]

You don’t seem to understand what a terf actually is. You just like throwing that word around and using it towards anyone that doesn’t agree with you, which only shows just how immature and ignorant you actually are.

People are allowed to have differing opinions to you. I get that being online all the time and only surrounding yourself with people that agree with you/have the same opinions as you, has made you think that everyone must agree with you and that only your opinions are “right” - but real life outside of the internet doesn’t work that way.

Lesbians do not like dick. I know that you want to call yourself a lesbian but if you’re attracted to penis, whoever the penis may be attached to, you are not a lesbian. And saying this does not make me a terf. It’s simply a fact.

You’re all “you shouldn’t reduce someone down to their genitals, women aren’t just boobs and pussy” - and yet you’re making posts yelling about how you want to suck girl dick and how women can have dicks, which completely contradicts what you’re saying as you yourself are reducing people down to their genitals by saying these things.

Lesbians are not attracted to men, nor are they attracted to penis, regardless of who the penis is attached to. That is just what a lesbian is. That’s the reason why we have a label to set us apart in the first place, so that people know that we are individuals that are not attracted to men or penis.

If you yourself are attracted to penis - good for you! You can suck all the dicks that you want to! Nobody is stopping you or saying that you can’t! But your want to suck cock means that you’re not a lesbian. It’s that simple. That isn’t “terfy”. That’s just what the lesbian identity is. And you cannot push your own personal attractions onto other women. Just because you find cock attractive, it doesn’t mean that lesbians have to. Not being attracted to male genitals does not make you a terf.

This whole “lesbian means non men loving non men” is nonsense. Tell me this - is it right for an AMAB male-presenting individual to insist upon calling themself a lesbian just because they identify as nonbinary? Even though they are male presenting, with male genitalia, and have zero plans to present themself in a feminine way or transition physically in any way? Everything about that person is physically still male, the only difference is that they say that they now say that they identify as nonbinary rather than cis?

Explain to me how you believe that person can acceptably call themself a lesbian, despite physically being every inch cis male. Explain to me how you believe that lesbians - women loving women - are now supposed to be attracted to that person, otherwise you would call them a terf. Because that’s what you’re doing.

terfs: “please don’t force us to like dick guys please we are actually very frightened of penises <//3 please don’t try and invalidate our lesbian identities just because we don’t like penises please <///3”

also terfs: “IF YOU LIKE DICK YOU’RE NOT A LESBIAN”

women are not their bodies. it’s really that simple. if you cannot find any value in women past their vaginas then you are the problem. have some respect for women, it’s that easy :)

secondly sexual attraction is not inherently objectifying.. it’s actually kind of scary you’d think that. why would you think that attraction to trans women can only ever be objectifying? are trans women not able to be loved like everyone else in the world can be? why does reading that someone can be attracted to trans women mean degradation? yet when you read smut with a cis woman i bet you never think omg :( why are we just objectifying tits and pussy now :( like fuck off lmao

[vintage-bentley]

There's a big Ao3 ship bracket going on and it's been a lot of fun, but of course, it can't be normal. A TIM sent in an ask talking about how the abundance of M/M slash ships are by straight fetishizing straight women (which like...pot and kettles), only for soooo many of the comments to be like "it's not!!! we're all q*eer here" "I was reading/writing M/M before I realized I was gay/trans/enby/etc" "look at this fanfic research paper only half the people writing/reading fic are cis!" and one person was like "ummm it's the quarterfinals and there's a canon nonbinary ship" and guess what it was...Ineffable Husbands. Which is named *Ineffable HUSBANDS* on the brackets. It's just a weird microcosm of all the nonsense of current fandom, it seems unreal 😭

I LOVE it when trans people cry about fetishisation about homosexuals. Because uh. That’s a very big part of ~trans culture~, talking about how slash fiction and lesbian porn made them “discover their true self” lmao.

But then the response to (valid) criticism of fetishisation are even funnier. “We’re all queer here!” (See; we’re all spicy straights!), “ummm ackshually I’m a gay trans man!” (See; homophobic straight woman), and so on. The frustrating part about this is if you’re a crypto in fandom, you can’t argue. You can’t say “yeah, but that means you’re a straight woman so you do need to be cautious about fetishisation” because then you’re transphobic! You have to either pretend that Aiden he/they/it is truly a gay man who is therefore incapable of being homophobic…or you have to be shunned for saying otherwise.

The insistence that ineffable husbands is nonbinary is also really funny. Because who in their right mind is going to look at those two middle aged dudes and go “ah yes, nonbinary representation!”? I don’t know how these people can take themselves seriously or believe their own nonsense lol. It’s borderline religious thinking…like you know the feeling when a religious person is blabbering about religion stuff as if it’s true and you’re just smiling politely and thinking “but that’s not true…”? That’s how I feel watching the rants and raves of gendies.

I’m glad the ship bracket actually called them ineffable husbands. Because much of the fandom has shifted into using either Aziracrow or ineffable spouses to make it gender neutral.

[chicknparm]

I think there’s such a thing as healthy cynicism but it’s a shame social media doesn’t really allow for such a thing. Either you’re for something or you’re against it. You’re cool and safe or you’re problematic. You’re hopepunk or you’re an edgelord.

I’ve not yet seen the Barbie movie (and am not in a rush to do so) but I believe when people say it’s extremely fun and well-made and enjoyable. Greta and that cast and crew are far too talented for it to be a bad movie. But it’s still an advertisement, and is still image laundering for a massive corporation, that everyone involved in the production, marketing, and consumption is complicit in. It’s okay, and a good thing even, to be skeptical and cynical about that. It is possible for good art to exist for nefarious reasons. That’s like, the entire Thing with all of gundam lmao.

It’s really cool that one of the biggest music acts right now is a trio of hugely talented queer women who succeeded on the strength of their songwriting, and that their music and performances are responsible for so much joy among lgbt women right now, myself included. It’s also okay to point out that this kind of thing never happens by accident, and is absolutely the latest step in a years-long marketing push by one of said group’s members for whom TS-level superstardom is obviously the goal. TS also found success through her songwriting, but it can’t be overstated that she never could’ve taken the swings that she’s taken in her career without building a massive fanbase with an absolutely deranged level of loyalty. What TS did through connecting to children through vivid, youthful, romantic songwriting and fairytale imagery, PB is doing by first making herself the ultimate Relatable pop star (esp in the earlier fake_nudes era) and now by fully embracing the Queer Joy/Kiss Your Friends vibe. That’s all cool, good for her, but it’s also okay to be cynical about the fact that these types of performances are just not possible for women who aren’t cis/white/attractive! Cool that PB and LD get to kiss each other and perform with their titties out, but 1: they are doing so while charging crazy prices to come watch them do it, 2: I would be arrested for doing that! Ditto for them making a show of performing in “Drag” in TN. I don’t doubt for a second any of their Allyship to the trans community, but the gesture itself isn’t that radical; women presenting a cartoonishly exaggerated performance of femininity surely ruffles conservative feathers, but it’s not under legal threat, there was no risk involved. It was much for effective as publicity, which was the primary intention.

It’s also very cool that the biggest video game in the world right now (and the presumptive GOTY) is an independent, (primarily) single player story driven CRPG that offers the truest role playing experience that a AAA game has offered in a decade. It is okay to be cynical about the fact that the very same people tearing into it for being Woke Propaganda also use it as a weapon to harass games journalists and developers. When a handful of devs speak with frustration about how the conditions for BG3 were impossibly perfect, and that basically no other AAA dev would be allowed the scope, freedom, time, and resources to make something like that, it of course gets twisted into “lazy game devs and journalists HATE this game because it doesn’t feed Globalist Greed.” It’s also okay to be cynical about Fandom As Identity as it pertains to this game, as we see more and more people make it to the endgame which is comparatively unpolished, unfinished, and at times genuinely broken. This has caused some blemishes on its sterling reputation, and of course people freak out. “There’s no way that anyone who isn’t trolling gives this game anything less than a 10. Maybe a 9.5 if you encountered bugs.” Something connected with people in a huge way, but that connection and widespread praise isn’t enough. It must be universal. Dissent is tantamount to violence. There’s an extra layer of cynicism I feel here too, and that’s centered around the miraculous timing of this game for WOTC. When trust in that company is at an all-time low, and there’s finally (finally!!) some momentum in getting people to try other tabletop games, in swoops BG3 reminding people “noooo don’t leave D&D behind, tieflings are so sexy haha.” Absolutely disastrous timing for indie ttrpgs!

Anyway tl;dr I wish people were more skeptical/cynical/aware of when they’re being manipulated by media and marketing, and had the cognitive capacity to recognize that something can be both a well-crafted and affecting piece of art, as well as an attempt to separate you from your money.

[tgirlsaintlawrence]

Just wanna lead with this: this isn't a "gotcha" ask, or a "I wanna pick a fight" ask, or anything like that, and it's 100% okay if you'd rather not answer. Do you reconcile being trans with being Catholic theologically? Or do you feel like you don't need to reconcile it, and it just fits? Or how do you see it? Asking because I genuinely want to understand, and I'm trying to be a good Catholic but also want to transition and am struggling to justify my decision, especially to my smart, theologically conservative fam.

Anon, I get it. You’re struggling with how to fit these parts of you together. It seems like a loosing battle. But I’m gonna tell you this fun fact- it’s not.

Quick aside- I’m not Catholic, I’m Episcopal. It’s like the Catholic Church in some ways, but simplified and Protestant-ized. If any specifically Catholic trans people have advise on this, please- feel free to share. I’m also NOT a theologian or clergyman, so don’t take any of this as the official stance of the Episcopal church. I really don’t want to make Bishop Micheal Curry look at my blog.

Personally, I don’t feel a need to reconcile my transsexuality with God or the Bible. Oh, there’s parts you can grapple with all day long, but it’s not necessary. Christianity seems to treat the Bible as the only way to experience God, and I think that’s an issue. The Holy Bible, as beautifully written and divinely inspired as it is, isn’t the living God. It’s a bunch of books people wrote about God with his help. Some of it is a history book. Some of it is poetry. Some of it is a bunch of laws that don’t apply anymore (for Christians, at least). Some of it is St. Paul making the biggest leaps in logic that I’ve ever seen.

So then how can I be both Christian and Trans? Because I can feel God’s presence with me every time I tell the truth about myself. And the haters will say “it’s an Angel of darkness that follows you”. But are you telling me, hypothetical haters, that God cannot open my eyes to his truth then? That he sees me inflicted with demons and says “lol. Lmao.”? If that’s the case, haters, you must think really little of God.

On family, I can’t give much advise. if yours is like mine, they’re just stubborn and won’t care one bit. But if they’re decent people, they will understand and accept you. If you are under 18 or rely on them, don’t come out unless you are certain they will be accepting of you. It’s a good way to be on the street, believe me.

If they don’t accept you, remember that the Lord, our father in heaven is always accepting of us. No matter what, God will love you.

My advise to you, dear anon, is to remember to trust in God to show you the truth about yourself, whether that means you’re trans or cis. The Lord is all powerful and all good, and his light will always shine your way of you let it.

If I can, I’ll get my priest to chime in, too. He’s not himself trans, but he’s more theologically educated than me.

Hope this helps.

[the1975attheirverybest]

I’m not gonna lie, these past few months I’ve been really questioning my love for the band. I say that meaning as a black woman a lot of the shit that’s been going around is just kind of hard to hear whether it’s true or not. And I don’t really know what to believe lol. I love the band so much but I can’t tell if my hesitation to accept is truly because I don’t believe he could do that or if it’s just like obsession on my part. I don’t know if any of that made sense. I just feel iffy about everything right now

Disclaimer: this is gonna be long. Sorry if you were just looking to vent and I made it into a whole thing. Won’t be offended if you just….ignored lmao.

Hey, babe. I’m sorry to hear that it’s been rough for you. Sending you hugs.

I know how you feel, or at least, I empathize because I went through something similar way back when the podcast was originally released. In Feb? March? Something like that. Like way before the Taylor stuff and way before tabloids and all that.

When that happened, I was talking about the podcast with someone on Reddit and they mentioned Matty’s “Islamophobia” and how as a Muslim I shouldn’t support him. And, my gut instinct was to be like “you have no idea what you’re talking about.” But the comment lingered in the back of my head for a long time. I’m not saying that your experience is the same and I don’t mean to reduce your identity to simply “marginalized” in the name of intersectionality or the common grounds that you and I might share. Being a black woman is different. I’m middle eastern and a hijab wearer (though I don’t feel comfortable saying I’m ‘white’ when my ‘whiteness’ was only decided on by the courts in 1972 cuz they didn’t want to admit that Jesus isn’t white but that’s a whole other issue lmao). But I will share what my experience has been in case there’s anything of value in it for you.

Like I said, the comment lingered with me for a while. I’m a literature and philosophy double major, and as FUCKIN pretentious as that is (seriously, super pretentious) I pride myself on sharp judgement. So, even if I weren’t Muslim, id still be shaken by such comments. And the accusations of him being queer-phobic or racist or sexist also made me feel shaken. I’d be ashamed of myself if a simple celebrity-fan relationship with a straight white dude prevented me from using all the training I learned at school to make the right judgement simply cuz he has nice hair or whatever, you know? it was a jarring moment. Like would I really wanna be complicit in my own oppression like that?

So, I decided to sit with it for a few weeks and think about it. Do my own “research” and look at interviews and online posts and stage performances where he’s done the things that people have accused him of doing. Hear arguments from both sides, then see how I feel after all that.

Here is the conclusion that I came to. Matty has certain blind spots due to his privilege. Not in a standard “he’s a cis het white guy in his 30s so he’s obviously privileged.” That’s true but that’s not it. I think with him it’s kinda more specific. For example, in the GQ 40+ minute video interview where he was praised for not being hyper masculine and being comfortable with wearing skirts and stuff, the interviewer followed her praise up with “don’t you think it’s hard being a man these days with all these conflicting ideas about masculinity” And he said “well, hold on a minute, isn’t it hard being a woman? I’m just thinking out loud here isn’t it hard being a human ?”

i see where he was going with this but I disagree pretty strongly. Even if you piece it together with stuff he has said in other interviews. Like in the Ion Pack Podcast. On the topic of masculinity he said “I’m not trying to make a political statement about gender when I wear skirts or dresses. Fuckin hate that the media writes about it that way. Like have you seen any musician ever??? It’s all been done before. You could make a coffee table book out of rock and roll artists wearing women’s clothing. Especially when you think about people who lived in New York (the pod was recorded in New York so I think that’s why he said that) at the time. And who WERE gay and who WERE black. And they were true outcasts and died for it. And you wanna give me credit? I hate that.” So the hosts were talking about how that political or whatever so, later on in the pod he said “I’m not seeing it from a right wing or leftist stand point. It’s not women’s rights or black rights or gay rights. To me, it’s humanity. Were all human beings shouldn’t we all be equal? Shouldn’t equality be something we all want?”

Do you see why I’m saying he’s privileged? Only a privileged person would say that. Like, he says these things because he was lucky enough to grow up in a pretty well to do upper middle class family and has always talked about how his parents had black friends and queer friends and he would see two men kissing on his living room couch when he was young and never bat an eye so he didn’t know it was “controversial” until he grew up and stuff. “I just keep thinking ‘who cares? But it turns out people do care.”

And he always says “artists signpost towards utopia.” Which is his goal I suppose. So it’s easy for him to say it’s not about black or white. Man or woman etc. and yeah as humans there are common grounds. sure masculinity is a struggle these days but ITS A DIFFERENT KIND OF STRUGGLE from femininity and womanhood. So let’s not equate them or say that they’re similar. That’s kinda reductive. I appreciate the sentiment that we should be motivated by universal humanity, but I don’t think that’s enough. You know? Those are separate problems that require separate solutions. Yes they overlap. Yes there’s a common ground here (white supremacy and patriarchy) that oppress us all, but acknowledging difference (gender, racial, social, sexual etc) is ESSENTIAL, in my view. Maybe it’s not in his view. In any case, I believe that’s why he does / says what he does.

Same with the nepo baby thing. I see where he’s coming from but I disagree strongly with him. He’s never worked a real job or had to struggle with money so he doesn’t get it. He’s gotta learn that most humans realities aren’t the same as his. He got really lucky. He gets that in the most basic/ obvious sense. Like sometimes he’ll say “as an English white guy who am I to talk about this” or “yeah Britain colonized the whole world but I’m not speaking as a British guy just as a human being.” But I think the subtler more implicit ways that his privilege has affected his worldview aren’t always clear to him.

But does all that mean that he’s secretly racist, bigoted, sexist, etc and he “showed his true colors” on that pod? In my view: no. If he were secretly bigoted, why would he go out of his way to make songs like JC2005, Loving Someone, People, Love It If We Made It, Looking For Somebody (to love) etc. ? Why would he stand at the Brits and use his speech time to read an excerpt from a woman’s article about how sexist the industry is? Why would he go out of his way to talk IN ALABAMA about the abortion ban at the time? Does this seem like a bigoted person’s behavior? He’s repeatedly rejected opportunities to go mainstream and make a shit ton of money precisely BECAUSE going mainstream would mean that he wouldn’t be able to do that sort of thing. He doesn’t have a publicist or an executive board at DH for a reason. As an artist, he sees that his work is influenced by the world around him so he can’t separate between the two and not feel like part of the problem. Like he criticized Imagine Dragons for that. He even criticized Taylor Swift for her 2019 marketing of Lover. This is the woman that he’s supposedly been in love with for a while.

I think those things are a better representation of who Matty truly is. He’s not perfect. Even his utopian thinking about equality is flawed in itself. But he’s a human being doing his best to be part of the solution and to honor the responsibility that comes with his platform. He’s seeing a problem in society and thinking what his role as an artist is and what he can do to help fix it.

He fucks up sometimes. And sometimes he knows he’s fucked up and tries to deal with it. Other times he needs it pointed out to him cuz of his blind spots. But more often than not he gets it right. And he’s not entirely wrong about how wokeness has become performative, either. Lol. We do need a better system. But his alternative of like transcending our differences and moving into universal humanity isn’t super helpful as a basis. It might be appropriate SOMETIMES. It’s certainly true that bigotry dehumanizes its victims. Treating marginalized people as less than is what enables bigots to do what they do. If white supremacists thought of us as their equals they wouldn’t be able to hold the belief that they are better than most of the rest of the world lol. So, the reminder that “we’re all human” or as he would put it “we’re all human we’re just like you man.” Etc. is nice. Like yeah ok But not as a blanket approach. That’s the place from which Matty operates and maybe he has a tendency to think that because common humanity is so obvious and everyone agrees with it, then surely everyone understands he’s doing what he does in good faith?

That, in my view, is the extent of his problem. He’s not the vile, “rancid” or whatever else the haters in my askbox and mentions and hashtags have been saying he is. Show me a white artist who GENUINELY puts his money where his mouth is when it comes to this stuff more than Matty. He’s a good person and his intentions are noble. His way of going about it though….needs some repairs. In short, he’s a smart person. He’s aware of how oppressive the world around him is. He’s trying to do something about it. But he fucks up. A lot of what he’s trying to stand up for isn’t his own experience. And sometimes he fails to see the limitations of his view cuz of course he does.

If none of that his helpful to you, you can always remove Matty from the experience of the music. I think Harry Potter fans have done a pretty good job of that. They won’t stand for J K Rowling’s bigotry, but the franchise is such a big part of them that they’ve separated the two. Won’t even watch the remake cuz she stands to profit from it. They made their own fandom that has nothing to do with her and sometimes is actively against her when appropriate. You could adopt the same approach if you love the music and it means so much to you.

Or you could just throw it all away if it causes you too much stress. I would say follow your gut. Your heart and your brain might sometimes not be accurate. Your gut will always be right. If it just doesn’t feel right to you/ doesn’t square with who you are, then to hell with it.

From one “minority” fan to another, I’m not black. I don’t know what it’s like to be black and I never will. But I wholeheartedly believe that you’re valued in the fandom and loved and you make it better by being in it. So, I’m sending you my love and I’m always here for you. That’s all. 💗

[atypicalsouda]

Vent post about my own pre-t trans guy sexual things/complaints. Bottom dysphoria. Feel free to ignore. Actually I’d like you not to comment please. If you’re a fellow adult transmasc who reads and feels the same go ahead and message me if you really wanna. Otherwise idc sorry. Don’t want a convo about it on my mainly self-ship blog.

I have a lot of bottom dysphoria, a lot more present than my top. I know that’s rare. But it is what it is. It fucking sucks. Where the hell is my dick? 😭

Anyway-

I don’t touch my vag(as in the hole. I do gotta get off somehow, I have suspicions that I might be hyper-sexual.). I never have and I used to think it was only cuz I was scared of infection. But now that I’m solid in my identity and recognize my dysphoria for what it is, I know that it’s mostly cuz I’m repulsed by it.

The main thing I wanted to say here is that I hate the rampant use of the words boypussy, boycunt, etc, here on posts made by transmascs for transmascs. I know that most of us have probably been touching themselves there from the get go, and I’m not saying it’s a bad thing to like it there or to stop being turned on by words like that.

But- what about people like me who find those kind of words to be complete turn offs?? Calling my vag a pussy or cunt is not sexy to me. The only thing it is a anal lube creator. Other than that it’s useless and I want it gone. I can’t browse transmasc related nsfw in peace when I wanna get off cuz they always expect the reader to want to touch there. There is one blog that’s an exception but they don’t post much.

And that’s another thing too- before I was knowledgeable about my fellow transmen I expected a lot more to be as into anal as I am. I mean to me it was always just logical, I’m a man. You fuck my ass or fuck nothing at all, ya know?

But no, I go to find nsfw ftm stuff here and only get barely anything I’m into. It just sucks being horny and unable to find appropriate ftm related jackoff material. Most the time I settle for gay stuff and just let myself believe I have a cis dick. Cuz I’m that into anal, lmao.

[gaytobymeres]

Rating Bertie Wooster’s outfits based on how much gender envy they make me feel

Because I’m bored <3

Stroppy

I like this outfit, nice and smart. Would love to wear it. Big fan of the watch chain. The pose definitely adds a certain whatsit. Makes me feel an average level of gender envy relative to other period tv shows. 7/8.

Broon suit

Um. Very brown. Like idk what else to say about this outfit. I like it though, he suits brown. I like the jumper vest/tie combo I think it’s very flattering. Though I like it doesn’t make me feel that much gender envy. 6/10.

Grey suit

Pretty bland but still pretty. I like the subtle check it has, though I don’t like the tie that much. Doesn’t make me feel that much gender envy. 5/10.

Grue (grey blue) suit

Really love the contrast of the red tie, and I am a huge fan of waistcoats (if you know me you know this already. The other day I embarrassed myself around my friend’s very serious lawyer husband bc I love his waistcoats+fashion sense. Anyway.) I like the subtle stripe on his shirt as well, and I’m a big fan of the cut of the jacket. Overall a very lovely look which makes me feel a fair amount of gender envy. 9/10.

Blue pin stripe suit my beloved

I love this outfit so much oh my god. Had to pause for a wee bit in order to fully appreciate it <3 I think the colour is lovely, the cut is exquisite and I love the stripe on the shirt too. I think the rose really makes it. 10/10.

Green blazer and vest

I really love this outfit, no joke I’m sure I’ve envied the exact same suit in the fancy suit shop in my city. I want his knitted vest thing so badly!! The cap is also just !! Love it!! Like it is a fairly basic outfit but it looks cosy and comfy and gives me a good amount of gender envy. 10/10.

Rich bitch at the beach about to get robbed

Overall I like this outfit but I have to say I amn’t a huge fan of the tie mainly because it clashes just a touch too much for me (and lowkey it reminds me of the tie I had to wear in high school). I love the gold buttons on the navy jacket, they really pop. Make a statement (they say: I’m gay and rich and my valet has a good fashion sense). The hat and the cane really complete the look. 8/10.

Dressing gown

Aww I love his wee purply-reddish-bluey fruity dressing gown so much <3 I personally don’t like wearing dressing gowns that much but I would wear this one. The fit of it is really nice, looking surprisingly smart for loungewear. It looks comfy, cosy, and a wee bit gay. 15/10.

Jeeves Vexer No. 1

Love it. An absolute look. Would buy this in a heartbeat and anyone who raises their eyebrow in a contemptuous manner will be getting slapped godbless <3 Huge fan of the gold buttons and I really love the angular shapes of the jacket. I especially like how the white/cream of the jacket contrasts with the black of the rest of his outfit. The cigarette holder is what elevates this outfit, however, and is imo an integral part of it. So is how he’s lounging, the lounging is essential. Makes me feel a lot of gender envy. 20/10.

Yee fuckin haw babey

Are you kidding me omg I wish I looked like this so badly, right down to the mildly abhorrent moustache. The hat. The moustache. The furry jacket. The suit. The tie. Absolutely fantastic. 100/10.

[gncmaya]

I’ve been lurking on radblr for a few months and I finally decided to make a radfem blog so I can reblog stuff without getting harassed for terf thought crimes and connect with other radfems.

I peaked on accident. I just so happened to come across a radfem blog while I was in the middle of trying to come to terms with my then-conflicted feelings about my gender. I ID’d as nonbinary/agender for a few years in high school because I hated (and still do, tbh) femininity and I didn’t “feel” like a woman. I never wore makeup or dresses/skirts, dressed for comfort rather than fashion, had short hair, hated my breasts and the fact that I was capable of getting pregnant, had “traditionally male” interests like math/science and video games, etc etc etc. I genuinely felt disconnected from the concept of girlhood. Using they/them pronouns felt nice for the first few months, but all it really did was make me even more uncomfortable with being referred to as a girl. My friends were supportive, but my constant focus on my gender and what pronouns people used for me and how I was presenting myself was just making me feel worse and more insecure. I stopped IDing as nb near the end of high school, but I still didn’t feel comfortable calling myself a woman, and my “gender identity” existed in a limbo state of not being cis or trans all throughout my undergrad.

I wished I could call myself a woman because I’m “AFAB” (though I was also too scared to admit it at first), but I knew that of any reason someone could identify as a woman, that was the one reason you weren’t allowed to have. And I knew the ~evil fascist terfs~ were the only ones saying “yes, it’s okay that you’re woman just because of your sex, no special ‘woman feelings’ required” so I decided to stick around to read through that radfem’s blog. It was hate reading at first, yeah, the blatant transphobia (aka calling transwomen male lmao) pissed me off and I didn’t understand where all the hate was coming from. 

But there was this sinking feeling in my chest that kept me coming back to her blog (and soon after, as many other radfem blogs as I could find) even after I clicked off in anger again and again. Because the more I looked into radical feminism, the more I saw other beliefs of radical feminists: anti-porn, anti-prostitution, anti-makeup, anti-patriarchal religion — things I already agreed with but never felt like I could voice in libfem spaces — and I thought to myself “finally, this is where the real feminists are.” I realized I had been lied to about what radfems believed, and just never… looked into it myself.

Radfems were making so much sense, but I didn’t want to be transphobic. I was told being gender critical was actually horrible, but no, it was exactly what I thought it was. The only reason it’s a Bad Opinion is because it’s incompatible with trans ideology. I looked for a libfem/trans-approved definition of woman only to realize… there wasn’t one. It’s just circular logic and references to this nebulous, ever-changing “woman feeling” that can’t be explained. It doesn’t make sense, none of it. 

I’m still struggling with the guilt of being ~transphobic~ but I can’t rationalize gender ideology any more and I can’t ignore the harm they’re doing to women and the LGB community. I’m so glad I found radical feminism. Letting myself finally say that I’m a woman because I’m female is so freeing. Like a weight has been lifted off my chest and I can stop forcing myself to ignore this huge amount of cognitive dissonance. There’s nothing I have to do or think or feel or wear — I just am. 

I am a woman.

[transmascissues]

being a gender studies minor as a transmasc person is so weird because i get to read all this stuff about misogyny that i’ve personally experienced and can relate to but only ever in the context of “this is what happens to women”

like...okay so are you claiming i must be a woman because i’ve experienced this or that i couldn’t possibly experience it since i’m not a woman? because either way, not only is that transphobic but it also makes me feel as if this gender studies class is missing some very important nuance about, yknow, gender

and honestly? unless the professor brings it up when we discuss the readings and recognizes that the readings are lacking in that department, i am going to assume she believes one of those two things, and i’m going to be VERY uncomfortable in that class, which sucks because i’m genuinely very interested in the subject (hence it being my minor) and i think there are definitely effective ways to use cisnormative feminist theory without ignoring their cisnormativity

because the thing is, to anybody with any interest in actually acknowledging trans people, the issues are VERY obvious and it would be pretty easy to point out and just say “hey, remember that even though the articles say women, many trans people who aren’t women also deal with this”

hoping it gets better but based on my experience with past gender studies classes here, it probably won’t lmao like literally every class i’ve had spends AT MOST one unit acknowledging the existence of trans people and even then, it’s usually trans people who fit into the weird cis feminist “women and femmes” category (aka “people they can at least pretend are women”) because apparently even people who have been studying gender for decades can’t take the time to deconstruct their cisnormative views of who misogyny affects

i just...wish we had a word for “anyone society sees as a woman” because it would be so helpful for describing misogyny in a way that includes everyone it affects without overlooking that it’s based upon a foundation of hating women specifically