#continuum flow

[outergalaxiesoutergalaxies]

Hey friends! It’s been a while but I was out of my mind with doing all sorts of time sensitive stuff. Anyways the whole album is out on Spotify if you want to listen to it!

[alunah-lalunah]

Existence is a Non-Differentiable Continuum of Consciousness

There is no boundary between consciousness and existence. Existence is a continuum of non-differentiable consciousness, where the distinction between what is 'subject' and what is 'object' is not only blurred but completely irrelevant.

Existence Is Just Awareing—Not Two Things, Just One Flow.

[phant0mth1ef]

fuck the big 3, it’s just big ME.

-

“woah! and l/n y/n shoots ahead of the crowd during the tightrope stage, are we sure her quirk isn’t too overpowered, eraserhead?!”

“yes, mic. we’re sure. she has a range.”

you were currently in the number one spot, just ahead of todoroki and bakugou as you ran as if your life depended on it, your arms pumping vigorously at your sides as the blood flowed through your veins.

you were waiting. waiting for the percect moment in the space time continuum, stragetizing, calculating. after all, your quirk was portals, you could open up a portal and walk out at your desired destination, but in order to do so, the timing must always be right unless you want to end up stuck in space.

there was always a distinct moment in which you could travel through a portal, get sucked into the galaxy, and quickly travel through in order to reach your desired destination. all of which is done in the short span of 10 seconds.

bakugou and todoroki had breezed past you by now, their quirks propelling them forwards as you waited for any distinct shift in the air, any sign.

and there it was, the smallest change in the way the clouds were shifting. your opening. you’d quickly opened a portal, getting through and zipping it shut as you ran inside the room you’d been trapped in, quickly reaching the end and opening up your exit portal.

if you were a second too early, or a second too late, you’d be lost in space forever. but your timing was impeccable as you walked through the last portal, your victory secured as you smiled up at the crowd.

you’d looked back, an angry bakugou, a nonchalant todoroki, and a disappointed midoriya.

“tch. space freak.” bakugou walked into your shoulder, causing you to stumble slightly.

you grinned, you could win this whole festival.

[sentient-stove]

“Clockwork, give me strength to break up with my boyfriend.”

“Daniel, that’s not in my wheelhouse.”

Danny shrieked at the response, clearly not expecting an answer considering he’d been standing alone in the room moments earlier. He wrenched back, door handle snapping off into his palm and then his legs caught the abandoned backpack on the floor, sending him to the ground with a thump.

Turns out, landing on a weeks worth of abandoned homework and textbooks in a cramped dorm room genuinely hurt. Danny lay there for a moment, staring at the glo in the dark stars stuck to the ceiling and wondered if he should maybe just give up for the day and crawl back into bed.

“Clockwork! Warn a dude next time!”

“Are you alright?”

“Yes! No! Yea— Can I be honest? I’m gonna be honest- I wasn’t expecting you to show up.”

“You specifically requested my help. Why are you breaking up with the Drake boy, the timelines are still intact.”

“I can’t do class, vigilante-around and date my hyperaware and paranoid boyfriend at the same time. Dating happens to be the one I can cut out. I already held a funeral for my social life.”

“A funeral for— I’m sure that there’s other solutions here.” For as confused as the ghost sounded, he sure was taking it in stride. Danny liked that about Clockwork, guy really just went with the flow and nodded along to any gossip Danny brought over. Or summoned in in this case apparently.

“Will the space time continuum collapse if I break up with Tim?”

“…No.”

“Cool, then I’m doing it. I might not even cry a little.”

[cubbihue]

I know that even tho Father Time was not happy about the secret wish that stopped Timmy and everyone from aging for 50+ years. Father Time does respect the hustle and determination that Timmy did to become a changling to not lose the only family that loves him unconditionally.

Oh you'd think that. But, as it turns out.

Timmy just committed a different sort of time crime.

Father Time and Timmy have a strained relationship that borders on contempt. Father Time does not like Timmy Turner. The boy has altered the flow of time so severely, on top of altering his space in the world and the fabrics of the continuum, that he's incapable of getting into Father Time's good graces.

Generally, when a child is stolen into Fairy World, Father Time will demand an equivalent exchange of time lost to its gains. As in: For every year the child has lost living on earth, it will be taken by the fairy who stole them.

However, when it came to Timmy Turner, Father Time has ensured that the kid will lose more than he'd gained.

Bitties Series: [Start] > [Previous] > [Next]

[justtakeout]

The Big Bang Continuum EP 2: The Coefficient of Chaos in Child-Rearing

Sheldon faces a parenting dilemma when Leonard’s hockey game clashes with Laura's newfound passion for acting, a hobby he blames on Penny. As the gang gathers at the ice rink, Sheldon tries to maintain his scientific approach, but family dynamics quickly challenge his methods. 

hi guys, this is ep2 of the tbbt webtoon! had to split what was originally ep2 into two separate episodes because of the upload limit. the next chapter will be the last one, and it'll probably take a while too since i haven’t even started it yet hahaha. hope you guys enjoy this one as much as i enjoyed making it, and i’d love to hear what you think! you can check it out here: Read The Big Bang Continuum :: The Coefficient of Chaos in Child-Rearing (Part 1) | Tapas Community Read The Big Bang Continuum :: The Coefficient of Chaos in Child-Rearing (Part 2) | Tapas Community

leonard cooper’s jersey number was supposed to be #12, but i messed up in ep1 and didn’t notice the typo until later. decided to roll with #14 instead to match his age, figured it worked out in the end.

apparently, “silver fox” means an attractive older man, which i had no idea about hhahaha. i was just throwing around team names with foxes, monkeys, and koalas. too late to change it now since the jerseys and logos are already done, and honestly, i’m too lazy to redo it t_t.

i don’t have a background in hockey or webtoons, so i pulled a lot of inspiration from dogshred (https://www.manhwatoon.com/manga/dogsred/) after seeing it recommended on reddit. mostly used it to figure out how to panel the game flow and sfx. no idea if what i did is accurate, i just went with what felt right, lol. if you’re into hockey manga, i’d say check it out, though i haven’t finished reading it yet.

for the gameplay, leonard cooper was loosely inspired by connor bedard (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bxFUWS5MBOc&list=WL&index=3&pp=gAQBiAQB), but the script’s game play is a mix of:

Little Caesars VS #2 Chicago Mission 15s | Game Highlights 2019 MAHA Bantam Major State Championship - HoneyBaked vs Little Caesars Bauer Bantam Elite Invite Finals - West Van vs Delta - Extended Game HighlightsAAA Bantam Day 3 Championship (Full game, no commentary)

asked a coworker for advice on the game and terminology, but yeah i don’t really know hockey hahaha used a ton of references while drawing the scenes.

also cut a lot of scenes from the original script since it felt like it was dragging the pace haha big thanks to angel @girlnamedangel for beta reading and giving super helpful feedback!

if you notice any differences in details, it’s probably because i drew some stuff from memory while at work lol. let me know if you spot any typos or mistakes so i can avoid them next time hahaha.

[noosphe-re]

The timeless task of architecture is to create embodied and lived existential metaphors that concretise and structure our being in the world. Architecture reflects, materialises and eternalises ideas and images of ideal life. Buildings and towns enable us to structure, understand and remember the shapeless flow of reality and, ultimately, to recognise and remember who we are. Architecture enables us to perceive and understand the dialectics of permanence and change, to settle ourselves in the world, and to place ourselves in the continuum of culture and time.

Juhani Pallasmaa, The Eyes of the Skin: Architecture and the Senses

[its-all-papaya]

Can I hear more about your clingy landoscar idea pls 🧡

Yes!! Bonus snippet!! RICHES!! (I couldn’t decide which to write so I picked both). this is like... not necessarily the same tone as the first thing at all... but... they fit on the same continuum if you imagine some progression in the middle, idk. like i said. the word doc is calling to me.

read the first part

After Monaco, after Oscar’s moved to Monaco, Lando finally convinces him to come out for a night. Oscar has drinks, of course, but he stays on the conservative side of sloppy. Mostly because the way Lando’s handling him is not something he wants to risk forgetting even a second of. 

Oscar knew Lando was tactile, but it’s ratcheted up a notch when he’s drunk. It’s much different, much more overwhelming, when Lando is everywhere, demanding every one of Oscar’s senses, instead of confined to only a voice and only sometimes a face on a phone screen. He starts out with a hand on Oscar’s back to keep him near in the flow of the crowd, but that evolves into an arm around Oscar’s waist after the first round of shots. Soon it’s fingers around Oscar’s hips while Lando waits behind him at the bar, then a leg tossed over Oscar’s when they’re squished into a booth with Charles and Max. After midnight, it’s Lando’s head tipped back on Oscar’s shoulder, throat exposed obscenely so Oscar’s got no choice but to watch his adam’s apple bob as he drains the last of whatever Charles had ordered for the table. Not long after, it’s Lando in Oscar’s lap (“just making room, not a problem, right, Osc?”) and Lando’s arm hooked around his neck, curls tickling Oscar’s chin, fingers brushing back and forth where his sleeve meets his bicep. Oscar can’t tell if Lando’s doing it on purpose, or just sensory seeking in his half-dazed, half-coherent drunk state. He can’t tell if any of it’s on purpose, truthfully, even when Lando’s mouth is against his ear, asking “d’you ever dance? would you wanna? with me?” and his teeth catch a little on the lobe on the last few words.

Oscar doesn’t dance, but what he does do is almost anything Lando asks him to, so it’s in the middle of a crush of sweaty bodies where he first notices something a little different in the direction of Lando’s touch. He’d been dragged by the wrist to the center of the mess, and he’s still planning to stay mostly sober, but he wishes he’d saved one of his drinks for now to help dull the itch of discomfort in his brain and his limbs. Lando’s plastered to his front, his own fresh drink in one hand, the back of Oscar’s shirt scrunched up in the other. Oscar’s seen Lando on the dance floor before, has seen Lando on the dance floor with men before (if some of it was through shitty watermarked fan videos on twitter, that was for him alone to feel any kind of way about), so he can tell the tension in Lando’s back isn’t an all-the-time thing. His grip on Oscar is just north of casual, even when he releases the shirt and goes back to Oscar’s hip, pinky dipping under the hem to rest warm against Oscar’s side.

“Dancing,” he says, like Oscar might have forgotten why they’re here.

Oscar hedges. “Think I’m too sober for that, mate.”

Lando grimaces briefly, but then he’s lifting his own drink up between their chests and backing up just enough to leave space for it there, an offering. When Oscar moves to take it, though, Lando shakes his head and draws him back in, knocking the rim of the glass against Oscar’s chin. He’s smirking like it’s a joke, but Oscar’s missing the punchline as Lando nudges the glass closer again, straw bumping up under Oscar’s cheekbone.

“What,” Oscar says.

“Drink,” Lando says. Like it’s obvious. His pinky dips lower, tracing the top of Oscar’s jeans.

Every part of Oscar feels too warm, sticky with sweat. There’s a reason he doesn’t do clubs. But there’s a reason he’d said yes tonight, and it comes back to him when Lando abandons pretenses and sneaks his whole hand under Oscar’s shirt. It’s too hot, Oscar’s blinking sweat out of his eyes every other time his eyes close.

The ice clinks impossibly loudly against the sides of the glass when Oscar’s fingers close around Lando’s wrist. Condensation is dripping steadily, sliding down the meat of Lando’s hand and pooling where Oscar’s fingers meet his skin. Their eyes stay locked as Oscar guides Lando’s hand back up. They stay locked even as his lips close around the straw and Lando’s part around nothing. His cheeks hollow as he drinks. Lando’s pupils are blown wide, and Oscar spares a second to consider whether Lando’s been out of his sight long enough to have taken anything without him noticing.

“Thanks,” he says when he’s had his fill. The glass is mostly empty and the liquor burns pleasantly all the way down, adding to the fire already smoldering in his stomach.

“Whatever helps.” Lando’s tone is different than Oscar’s ever heard it, but he doesn’t have time to figure that out, because then Lando’s turning around, pressing his back to Oscar’s front, and reaching back to catch Oscar’s hand in his free one - the one that had been on the bare skin of his side a second ago. Everything is still hot and close and overwhelming, but the space under his ribs feels cool with the memory of Lando’s palm.

It’s a blur for awhile. Half of Lando’s drink isn’t really enough to move the needle for Oscar, but he feels drunk instead on the feel of Lando’s abdomen under his palm, the subtle shift of muscle as Lando moves. His head spins with the press of Lando’s hips back into his own, thoughts nebulous in the blue-green light. He catches the eye of a girl across the floor at one point, and her smile sharpens when she sees him looking. He’s not even, really; it’s neither here nor there to him when she starts moving across the floor. Lando’s been like an extension of Oscar’s own body for a bit already, tuned half out for his own sanity, but everything barrels back into focus when Lando’s head tips back again. Oscar recalls his adam’s apple, Charles’ neon shots. A lifetime ago.

“Having fun?” Lando mumbles. His mouth brushes Oscar’s skin. Oscar’s half-convinced it’s an accident, but when he tips his head down to read the words off Lando’s lips, they press more firmly to his jaw. They’re wet and cooler than the ambient air, like he’s just drained the ice from the bottom of his glass. Oscar’s eyes flick back up to clock the woman’s progress, but she’s paused steps away. Oscar feels caught out and guilty even though he hasn’t done anything at all.

“Always, with you,” is what he says. It must be the correct answer, because Lando’s head turns in even further and his lips brush Oscar’s neck in little closed-mouth passes.

When Lando speaks again, Oscar can feel the words spelled out against his skin, drawing goosebumps: “Wanna get out of here?”

Oscar does. Has since the minute he walked in, really. His arm around Lando tightens, drawing him in closer for a final moment, bidding farewell for now to this version of them on the dance floor.

Lando turns back around in his arms, then, not a centimeter further away than he’d started.

“Walk me home?” he asks into Oscar’s cheek.

And Oscar does.

[librarycards]

Jenny Odell: I sometimes feel that in an individualistic culture, people get freaked out by the idea of being tied down or responsible for anything. Thinking about a gift economy, they might say, “I want the gift part but not the accountability part.” Lately, I’ve been volunteering in this native plant restoration group, and one of the most surprising parts has been how enlivening it is to help keep something else alive (I’ve never had a garden before). Sometimes I truly can’t tell whether I’m giving or getting. What are some ways that you see participation in a gift economy changing the participant’s sense of herself and her place in a network? In other words, is participation itself part of the gift?

RK: Yes. Exactly. Participation is part of the gift, where giving and getting meld into one another. A garden teaches you that every day. Gifts and responsibilities are always coupled to each other.

Of course, you’re right that given our hyper-individualistic culture, many people are not eager to embrace responsibility. Its often confounded, I think with the notion of “obligation”. Obligation feels to me like an involuntary demand on our time and energy, imposed from outside without the assurance that you’ll benefit in return. I’m sometimes reluctant about that, too. But, responsibility is an invitation to respond to need, an opening to reciprocity in which the benefits flow both ways. The benefits of participation in a gift economy are not only flowing to the gift recipient but the giver as well. Working on your restoration project, or any other gift exchange strengthens your own sense of agency, doesn’t it? It awakens care and compassion, builds relationship and nurtures your own identity as a person of capacity, of having enough abundance in your life that you can share it. I think it contributes to a sense of purpose, which we know is good medicine. It reminds you that you matter, that you’re part of something. That’s a big reward.

I find that some of the times that I feel most fully alive are in experiences of shared physical work in community with others. Like an old-time husking bee or shared planting. We’ve lost so many of the opportunities for that and gift economies provide the opportunity to work in common, to satisfy the need for belonging. And when that work is on the land and the benefits flow into our neighborhood of many species, the benefits are multiplied beyond the boundaries of ourselves.

JO: There is a really beautiful analogy you draw between the economy of nature and the human gift economy. Asking what in the gift economy functions as the “sun”–the constantly replenishing source of energy–you speculate: “Maybe it is love.” Reading this, it occurred to me how love is in essence a surplus, the force that gets things going. Could you speak more to the emotional and practical role that things like love and gratitude play in a gift economy? And how do they change the way we see “resources”?

RK: The fundamental currency of a gift economy, is relationship, not money. I suppose it’s what some people call “social capital”, but I’m not fond of that term. Participation in a gift economy could create a whole continuum of relationships, from the warmth of being cared for or an expanded sense of justice to just plain neighborliness. This can create a sense of security because mutual reliance grows from gift exchange. There is a sense of satisfaction in being able to give, and a sense of kinship in being able to receive, when we share the mutual acknowledgment of human vulnerability. For me, that continuum of relationships includes the possibility of a currency of love and gratitude that motivates the gift exchange, which is the source of the flow, between people and between people and the earth as well.

Gift-giving is a way of saying “I see you.” I see what you need and I see what I have to share. My well-being is tied to yours and yours to mine. It develops a trust that when I am in need, there will be abundance shared with me. The giver and the recipient are honored at the same time. That seems a lot like love to me.

Robin Wall Kimmerer, interviewed by Jenny Odell, Gift Thinking. [emphasis added]

[outergalaxiesoutergalaxies]

ALL WIRED UP - a playlist

assimilate this! (exquisite technological mix)

WELL WELL WELL. I haven’t put together a playlist for a month or so, and it’s time. Also haven’t shared many of them here, I don’t think. We will be welcoming Virgo season in with a focus on robot rock, Borg perfection, wired up to the max, a playlist for all you machines and machine-lovers out there.

The Man Machine - Live

Kraftwerk

I was fortunate enough to see Kraftwerk twice in 2014; it was a religious experience. I saw them perform this album, 1978’s The Man Machine in its full entirety. Despite being a huge fan, I wasn’t expecting much. “How cool could it possibly be?” I, a fool, asked myself as I walked into Walt Disney Concert Hall in downtown LA. I knew they were going to be standing in front of their trademark podiums pressing buttons. What I didn’t know was how that was going to make me feel. I love the crowd coming in at 0:26 when the beat starts, and again at 0:59, which is when I must assume that the curtain fell to reveal The Robots. If you don’t know this entire album, you haven’t yet lived. Please listen to all of it.

Electricity

Midnight Star

“You got my head all wired up”

This was the start of this mix; it was the root my working Data/Geordi fan mix for forever, aka the “DaForge” mix to those of us with excellent taste. You may recognize Midnight Star from “No Parking On The Dance Floor,” their entire catalog is full of funky computer hits.

Human Being

Jane Inc.

“Accentuate my structure”

A quite hard synth and light drums anchor this track, which came across as a lovely surprise in some of my explorations for this playlist.

Get A Little

Patrick Cowley

Yes, this song has been on a few of my past mixes, including last month’s. To that I say, mind your business and get your ass on the dance floor. Patrick Cowley may be most known for his production work with San Francisco dance legend Sylvester (You Make Me Feel, etc.), but his solo work stands on its own as manual/physical synth excellence. Cowley died of AIDS in 1982, another bright light stolen from us.

Faster Than The Speed Of Love

Georgio Moroder

No synth-heavy mix is complete without the Italian stallion of synth, the techno-grandfather himself. Sorry about the poor transition but this entire album is a flow worth experiencing in full.

Desire

Future World Orchestra

If you’ve ever wanted to see a 1980’s track suit dripped out cartoon-looking white guy from the Netherlands playing about $70,000 worth of synthesizers, look this video up on YouTube. Big thanks to the Pop Overbite TikTok account for helping me discover this duo.

10 Out Of 10 (feat. Kylie Minogue)

Oliver Heldens, Kylie Minogue

Continuum music lovers and long time Kylie fans rejoice; we have less than a month before we get an entire new record. Biting my hands waiting for TENSION, which is out on September 22nd. Love the timeless-yet-90’s feel of this soon to be classic.

Get On Up And Do It Again

Suzy Q

No clue the story of this band (I believe they’re Canadian?) but this one’s been on my “get it going” playlist for a while

Lovelife

Phoenix

Always been a fan of Phoenix, especially when they get back to their synth roots. I don’t think this album (Ti Amo) had a major hit off it, certainly nothing like 2009’s ‘Wolfgang Amadeus Phoenix,’ which is unfortunate as there are some fantastic sounds on here.

I’ve Got Your Image

Cameo

This was sampled by Queen Latifah’s 2003 ‘Better Than The Rest.’ The titular line made me think of Seven’s eidetic memory, and it was time for a slow jam.

She Blinded Me With Science

Thomas Dolby

No relation to Dolby sound systems, but there may as well be with this 1982 classic that remains unlike anything else. Check out the video if you’re not familiar.

Data

Shook

I’m not terribly familiar with this artist, who’s based in the Netherlands, but the way he handles a synth works for me.

The Robots - 2009 Remaster

Kraftwerk

Again, I will point out that this album was released in 1978. The live version of this song also hits hard, if you’re so inclined to check out any of Kraftwerk’s live work.

You Are In My System

The System

Smooth techno robot funk, just the way I like it. No recollection of how I came across this hit other than the algorithm recognizing my exquisite taste.

Phantom

Justice

If Daft Punk is the robot rock dressed up on the dance floor, Justice is what you get at 3am after everyone is either wasted or high out of their mind, finding a way (any way!) to keep the party going. Never before or since have I encountered a record that scratched this particular sonic itch for dirtied up, fuzzed out synths continuing to deliver danceable, on the beat hits. If Daft Punk’s “Discovery” plugged us in, 2007’s “Justice” stripped our wires and started sparking them together. Ugh. I could go on about how much I love this record for a very long time.

Work Out Tonight

Ultraflex

I don’t have much to say about this Norwegian/Icelandic duo, other than keep party rocking, y’all.

Gettin’ To The Good Part

Herbie Hancock

What do you say about a legend whose work spans multiple genres, executed flawlessly? Not much, but 1980’s Herbie Hancock showcases his ability to seamlessly fit in with any and all new trends. You know more of his work than you think you do through samples and film, but you can always get to know him better.

Start Computer

Shook

It’s not very often that I hear a song that takes me back to the ebullient joy I felt in 2001 upon hearing Daft Punk’s ‘Discovery’ in full for the first time, but this song touches the vocoder-loving places within me.

Luminescent

Poppy Baskcomb

Baskcomb hails from the UK and I look forward to digging more into her work. Always a fan when a pop song chooses to anchor itself around an uncommon word.

Night Cruiser

Deodato

There seem to be a few different Deodatos but I’m assuming this is the Brazilian musical artist, as I hear those influences present here. Unsurprisingly, a great tune to jam around in your car at night, pretending you’re in a cyberpunk movie.

Master Rocker

Bernard Wright

This album is an instant classic, funky in all the right ways, with a touch of technological that anchors it firmly in time and place.

Sometimes

Les Rythmes Digitales

Don’t have much information about this 1999 album, but I would believe if you told me it was either from much earlier or much later. Always been a fan of music that is both faithful enough and innovative enough to be placed in any time period.

One More Time / Aerodynamic (live)

Daft Punk

My robot boys. If they ever return from retirement, bet that I will be spending my life savings and then some to see Daft Punk live. I have been a Daft Punk fan since 2001, and I am so grateful to exist at the same time as this duo. Listening to Discovery when it came out is an experience in time that I will never forget. I had tried to listen to this album when it came out, but I wasn’t yet advanced enough in my music appreciation to enjoy them live. The first time I heard the transition between songs, every hair on my body stood on end. I want few things more than a Daft Punk reunion tour, but this and bootlegs will have to suffice for now.

Messages From The Stars - Sped Up

The Rah Band

First encountered this song in a twitter exchange about DaForge; it’s not often that a song sounds just as good sped up as it does in the original speed.

Nobody But You

The Apples In Stereo

The first time I heard this song, I was working at Nordstrom, where you could call the operator (even as an employee) and ask for them to tell you the song. The swooping ‘you’s’ at the end are what spurred me into action. I wrote down the name of this song on a pastry bag, and this album has not left me since. It is a warm hug from outer space.

Translight

Breakbot

Eagerly awaiting a new album from Breakbot like any day now. The instrumentals remain undefeated.

Chaos - Laura van Dam Remix

Andrew Bayer, Run Rivers, Laura van Dam

I’m not terribly familiar with anyone here, but this song is a great way to draw me in to a lovely, sonically spacious and danceable remix.

Spotlight

Kylie Minogue

Heartbroken that there isn’t an extended mix of this yet (the DISCO extended mixes are still worth checking out), as it remains one of my favorite tracks from 2020’s incredible DISCO. Only the queen of pop could record an album like this in quarantine. Legends only!!!!

You Put A Charge In My Life

Brainstorm

Whoever makes me a fan vid of Geordi and Data being ‘very close friends’ to this is gonna eventually get a giant hug and possibly (okay, definitely) dinner. No clue what’s happening on the cover, but who doesn’t want to love an alien? Please be for real.

One Hot Love - 2018 Remaster

Makoto Matsushita

I knew nothing of Japanese City Pop until my Spotify started feeding it to me, and I’ve become obsessed with these oh-so-smooth tracks that remain danceable and sharp. A true mood, a vibe, a way to turn around any bad day.

Messages From The Stars

The Rah Band

And to close out the mix, enjoy the song in all its 1980s synthed out, original speed glory, still grooving and moving, a hit in either tempo.

That’s the mix, enjoy! Keep robot rocking and technological trancing🤖

[noise-vs-signal]

The Surroundings

The subconscious is not below conscious awareness, but in fact surrounds and contains it.

Conscious awareness appears as a local intensification, a luminous space within a more extensive psychic continuum. The “subconscious” is not spatially lower; it is the ground-field whose perturbations precipitate the figure we call self-reflection. Depth becomes horizon.

Phenomenology already insists that no figure is intelligible without a surrounding ground. What we call object or thought is a momentary stabilization of contrasts inside a wider, pre-thematic manifold of sensation, memory, affect, and bodily implication. Ontologically, ground has priority: it makes figure possible, not vice-versa.

Thus the so-called subconscious is the enabling matrix—a dynamic reservoir of potential meanings—out of which discrete acts of consciousness crystallise.

If consciousness is a focal condensation, its preferred medium—linear language—mirrors that narrowness. Symbolic imagery, by contrast, functions radially: multiple semantic vectors erupt at once, matching the multi-dimensional logic of the surrounding field.

What appears “opaque” in a symbol is exactly its surplus to the focal point—the overflow of ground that cannot be exhausted by propositional statement.

The conscious self is not a self-subsistent layer placed atop substrates; it is a relational nexus produced by wider dynamical flows.

If the “outside” of self is already psyche, the boundary between private interiority and world diminishes; care for context is care for mind.

We can also say that our focal awareness is Time, the successive, moment-by-moment articulation of experience, which is surrounded by Eternity, the supra-sequential ground in which all possible moments already inhere.

Time is therefore not an independent dimension but the serial surface that becomes visible when Eternity is locally illuminated.

Eternity is “the complete, simultaneous possession of endless life.” - Boethius.

Ontologically, Eternity is not a distant realm; it is the unreleased surplus of every present moment, the total repertoire of patterns awaiting selection.

Super-consciousness is the state in which Time is perceived from the side of Eternity. Here past, present, and future are apprehended as facets of a single, multidimensional event-space.

Across traditions, Time is a creature of perception, while Eternity is the ground in which perception itself takes place.

The Imaginal World is an ontological middle distance where the formless potencies of Eternity acquire shape, colour, and story on their way toward empirical manifestation. Conversely, sensory particulars ascend through imaginal transfiguration when they are taken up as symbols and re-opened toward their eternal source.

Everyday events are re-read symbolically, re-enter the Imaginal, and thence disclose their eternal dimension. Artistic and ritual acts work precisely by orchestrating this ascent.

Mutually exclusive images can coexist without contradiction—an echo of the total simultaneity of Eternity.

The Imaginal is the place where Eternity and Time interpenetrate, making possible both the descent of meaning into history and the ascent of experience toward the timeless whole.

[outofangband]

I really loved @gwaedhannen ‘s post about wanting more strangeness in First Age Beleriand and I had a post awhile back about potential strange ecology for Middle Earth so I wanted to revisit it with some more thoughts!

Following up to my speculative biology ideas for elves,

Like the last list, these are more jotting down ideas, please please feel free to give me any to elaborate on!

Mammoths on the Helcaraxë and other cold reaches. Tolkien talks of all creatures that walk or have ever walked the earth existing in Valinor and throughout Arda hence prehistoric and extinct species can also exist here. I do also headcanon smaller herds of woolly mammoths and woolly rhinos in northern Hithlum and north of greater Beleriand. Stellar’s sea cows in the frozen waters:(

Early cenozoic aquatic birds such as Hesperornis off the coasts of Balar and Alqualondë.

 Enchanted orchards of Valinor; large, seemingly abandoned self containing gardens and orchards. There are fruit tree orchards hidden behind ivy covered walls; some always filled with Autumn breezes, citrus groves always kept warm and bright lined with lemon trees and deep green grass. Except for the Maia who tend them, the only beings who enter the orchards are elves who do so, usually by mistake.

There are places throughout Arda where the Music was not well, loud, enough. They can be the size of a footstep or a field and are not fully connected to the space time continuum. Those who tread on them will end up elsewhere in time or space and will never realize what had happened.

In the great expanses of unexplored Valinor, there are coves, glens, lagoons, and all sorts of other places that seem shift and change, being there one day and not the next. Even while walking through familiar, charted territory, there is always the possibility of ending up in a hidden clearing, covered in hanging mosses and with strange lights all around.

The forests of Beleriand are full of strange, sometimes dark creatures that have never been properly documented. They are the strange hybrids of Yavanna’s creations and Melkor’s corruption and a few have escaped the eyes of even the Ainur. 

The underground lakes of Middle Earth, especially around Angband contain blind, hungry beings, nourished by the volcanic soils. Strange fungi and lichen stick to the walls of the caverns and passageways beneath the fortress.

There are hot springs in several locations in Beleriand South of the Ered Wethrin (there are many in the Ered Wethrin of course but these are not exactly relaxation destinations). Namely in Himring, throughout Hithlum, north of Barad Eithel, parts of Dorthonion, in the caves of Androth, and parts of the Ered Luin. Not all of these are used by residents and not all maintain safe temperatures or conditions but some do! In many parts of Northern Beleriand, they're used for bathing and communal relaxation. There are other springs throughout the March of Maedhros and I like the idea of Himring being built around a hot spring. There are hot and warm springs in both Nargothrond and Menengroth. The definition of warm springs differs from hot springs only in average temperature

The caves of Menengroth and Nargothrond allow elves and others access to the strange wonders of the underground world of Middle Earth.  They are lit by lanterns and by certain bioluminescent plants. There are windows in key areas that allow sunlight to filter into some of the larger halls and though there are small gardens of species that do not require direct sunlight, some are stationed in the areas where sunlight filters in. A small tributary of the river Narog flows directly through one of the great halls of Nargothrond. Its flora and fauna remain untouched by the elves and algae and aquatic plants as well as small fish, salamanders in their early stages, and stranger creatures are visible to see for those who walk along it. 

In realms with Ainur or certain Eldar rule, natural life may not follow typical laws. Melian has great influence over the biodiversity and climate of Doriath for example even without meaning to.

The horror potential of the boundaries of the girdle or of Nan Elmoth. Time and space distorting, the forest becoming a maze, bird calls confusing and disorienting unwary or unlucky travelers

The Ered Gorgoroth, the eerie, mysterious mountain range, bordered to the north by Dorthonion and to the south by Nan Dungortheb. It was said the spawn of Ungolian haunted these mountains and the valley. I have some more posts on this but I've always imagined there being many pools and meres in Ered Gorgoroth, many harmless though frigid and some completely corrupted by the powers of Ungoliants spawn and other beings. Unfortunately, it’s not always possible to know which was which until it was too late.

Chemical reactions causing glimmering or colorful water. Elves learn carefully when this has occurred due to natural phenomena and when it is the result of unnatural influence or Ainur presence.

Salt lakes and landlocked waters mimicking ocean conditions. I’ve always imagined there being a lake like lake Baikal in the March of Maedhros

More Bioluminescence

The realms draped in dragon reek especially around Nargothrond. The pools of Ivrin are ruined by Glaurung and they are the source of the river Narog, the largest tributary to Sirion. The entire land could be poisoned. I imagine that plants wither or lose color, birds and frogs stay silent, animals are thrown off of their natural cycles, The orchards in the hills barren or producing foul fruit, strange happenings resulting from drinking from the river Narog or even eating animals that drank from it…

Alternatively the effects of the water where the power of Ulmo is still strong such as in Nan Tathren or the Twilit Meres

[sadnymi]

"My Dreams Are Just Dreams... Until They're Not" modern Mattheo riddle × reader [chapter six-the end]

[previous chapter] [Epilogue]

Warnings: SMUT18+, strong language, childhood trauma ,abusing, cheating, angst, death, sexual harassment ( not the main characters)

Please understand that this chapter will delve into darker themes. I urge you to pay close attention to the trigger warnings provided.

words: 3,462

Reading Time : 12mins 35sec

Summery: A week at my best friend's beach house, surrounded by our friends as we meet her soon-to-be fiancé's companions, marks a turning point where the very fabric of my beliefs begins to unravel. It's during this week that I encounter the boy who incessantly appears in my dreams, blurring the distinction between the world of my subconscious and the tangible reality before me. Matthe Riddle emerges as the poison I willingly imbibe, a curse that feels akin to a dream,

Time

[ˈtaɪm] noun

the ongoing journey of existence and the unfolding of events across the continuum of the past, present, and future, regarded as a whole.

"Time is a circle." A relentless cycle where every act, past and future, repeats endlessly, casting a melancholic shadow over

Startled awake, I jolted upright, my heart racing in panicked cadence. The hand on my shoulder triggered a surge of adrenaline, and I frantically scanned my surroundings through bleary eyes.

It was Sarah's voice that sliced through the haze of my disorientation, her words shattering the fragile veil of sleep that had momentarily shielded me from the harshness of reality.

"Y/N, we've arrived," she announced, her tone bearing a weight I couldn't yet comprehend, sending shivers down my spine as I grappled with the dawning realization

I gazed down at the crimson hoodie, my eyes tracing its familiar contours, then shifted my gaze toward the house. A sudden realization struck me as I observed Sarah's attire, sending waves of confusion and panic through my senses.

"Why—why no, what's happening?" The words stumbled out of my trembling lips, uncertainty echoing in the air.

"Y/N," Sarah attempted to reach for my hand, but my reaction was visceral—a frantic rejection.

"No, no, no." I hastily exited the car, grappling with the disorienting feeling that something was fundamentally wrong. "We have done that before so many times."

Sarah stood frozen before me, and in my desperation, I demanded answers, scanning my surroundings. "Where's Mattheo? What have you done?"

"Oh my gosh." Her tears flowed like rivers. "You remember."

“What?" My own tears, hot and stinging, blurred my vision.

"I missed you so much," she cried, launching herself at me. Her arms wrapped around me with a desperate intensity. "I'm so sorry, Y/N. I love you so much. You did it."

"Sarah, I don't understand." I uttered through sobs, shaken within her arms. "I'm dead—I'm dead. It was me all along. I'm the goddamn ghost."

Then, the truth struck me again—I'm dead. The memories flooded back, the pain, the dagger in my heart, every haunting detail.

Freaking out, I staggered back a few steps. "I shouldn't be here. You shouldn't be here. I'm dead.

"Hey, it's okay, let me explain–"

"Where's Mattheo? What have you done?"

With my body trembling uncontrollably, my legs propelled me forward, a primal need to escape the crushing weight of reality.

Dead. I was dead , that much I knew. I was the ghost, not him. Those dreams weren't just dreams.

Tears streamed down my face, blurring my vision, yet the crimson of the hoodie remained sharp, a constant reminder of the life I'd so tragically lost. With a strangled sob, I turned and fled.

I ran, not knowing where, not caring. All I knew was the chilling truth – I was the ghost, not him. The dreams, the whispers – they weren't dreams. They were the remnants of a life brutally stolen, a love forever unfulfilled.

A primal scream tore from my throat as two powerful arms encircled me, lifting me from the ground. My legs flailed, a desperate attempt to escape the terrifying disassociation of my body.

"It's me, love," mattheo whispered, his voice warm against my ear. "It's okay. I've got you."

"What have you done?" I choked out, a strangled plea amidst my hysterics. "mattheo, what have you done?"

He ignored my question, holding me tighter, his touch a desperate anchor in the storm that raged within me. Finally, my frantic kicks subsided, replaced by a shuddering sob as I rested my head on his shoulder.

"matt," I rasped, the words thick with the metallic tang of fear. "I'm dead—-I'm dead, aren't I?"

He lowered me to the ground, his grip never faltering, turning me to face him. His eyes, usually so warm , blazed with an intensity that sent shivers down my non-existent spine.

"I told you, my love," he said, his voice a low growl. "I wouldn't allow it. I fixed it."

"But how?" I cried. "I died! It can't be undone!"

“ technically no you’re not died I mean not yet “

A cold dread coiled in my gut. "You… you played with time?"

The silence that followed was an answer in itself. I lurched back, fear morphing into a chilling realization. "The Council – that's forbidden!"

"Dead," he muttered, his voice devoid of emotion. "Every single one of them."

My breath hitched. "You… you killed them?"

"They knew," he said, his jaw clenched. "They knew what was coming. They agreed to it,Once you took control of your family's business, you would have uncovered the illegal activities they were doing with your stepfather. They didn't think it was worth the risk to wait and see your reaction, so they allowed it."

"And you killed them?" My voice was a broken whisper.

"Every. Single. One." His touch grazed my cheek, a feather-light caress that sent shivers through me. "A slow, agonizing death. They begged for mercy. Your name was the last word on their lips before I extinguished their pitiful existence,before I slit their throats "

"I brought them the war you were protecting them from."

“Then you stopped the time?"

"No, I did it after what happened with you in my arms. I didn't hesitate saying the words , then come time , And I manipulated it. I bent it to my will, I couldn't let you go. So I went back. I needed to go back further, to prevent your death entirely"

“ I don’t remember—-“

A flicker of pain crossed his face. "I know you don't remember. That's why we kept reliving this vacation. Going back in time wasn't enough. You had no memory , you needed to remember “ that’s why we were doing the whole vecation thing , going back in time wasn’t enough you remembered nothing “

“ The plan was to go back and kill him before it all happened. But then we realized…".

"It wouldn't be enough," he finished. "Your soul… it needed to recognize itself. Without your memories, your body would be a hollow shell."

He paused, his voice tinged with pain . "The first time you didn't remember anything. You panicked and we had to rewind Without your soul, your body would be a hollow shell. Alive, but empty. We brought you back, but the memories wouldn't stick,

Then came the dreams, fractured pieces of your past. and after that Sarah appeared, and your mind… it blocked it all out. We fabricated stories, some you believed. We triggered memories, hoping to jog your soul… Sarah, Lorenzo, even my Julie’s crush on me , or my tattoo —— even my touch, Sometimes, we thought we were making progress, only to have you panic, only to rewind again."

"Like the beach,when I saw him …"

"The worst," he confirmed, his voice cracking. "You freaked out and it was like losing you all over again."

A wave of nausea washed over me. "So… all this time? All these… vacations, resets… was it all a fabrication?"

"A necessary one," he said softly

“How long?" I choked out, fighting back a sob that threatened to shatter me.

"A year," he whispered, his voice thick with raw emotion.

"A year, Mattheo! No! You can't do this! You're destroying yourself. Please, you have to stop!"

He cupped my face in his hands, his eyes filled with a desperate, possessive light. "Never," he said fiercely. "Did you truly think I would let you go, my love?"

My heart ached with a love so fierce it threatened to consume me. "But this… this is too much. You can't keep manipulating time. What if I hadn't remembered? What if I was just… lost?"

"Then I would have kept searching," he said, his forehead resting against mine. "A year, a thousand years… for whatever it takes , I would rather be a haunting presence in your dreams than live in a world without you."

"I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry it took me that long to remember. I'm so sorry you had to endure all of that," I murmured, my voice weighted with guilt and regret.

"No, my love, you should never apologize," he replied softly, his eyes reflecting a mixture of pain and determination. "I promise you, I will dismantle this world, reduce it to ashes, and offer them to you for enduring all of that."

"You were so hurt that first night…"

“The first nights were always the hardest," he rasped, his voice thick with a pain that mirrored my own. "Seeing you look at me like a stranger…It fucking hurts “

The immensity of his love, the depth of his sacrifice, washed over me. In that moment, the world around us faded away. There was only him, only me, bound by a love that defied even the cruel hand of fate.

The world seemed to fade away, leaving only the two of us, bound by a love that transcended even death itself.

Each footfall felt heavier than the last, the earth groaning under the weight of my spectral form. Yet, an unseen force propelled me forward, a celestial compass guiding me toward the man whose heart mirrored the rhythm of a dying star.

As I drew closer, the air crackled with a raw energy, a desperate yearning clinging to the very molecules around him. Closing my eyes, I felt the tremors of his heartbeat – a lone drum echoing in the vast emptiness that was my existence.

"Even in this spectral existence," I whispered, my voice a mere tremor in the wind, "my soul recognizes yours. Even with my memories a fading tapestry, my heart, though unmoored, remembers the language of your love. Even in death, I will wander the cosmos, etching your name on the moon's surface, whispering it to every twinkling star, a desperate plea to remember."

A tear, a teardrop of stardust, traced a shimmering path down my cheek. "If oblivion claims my consciousness, if even my own name fades from the echoes of eternity, one truth will remain: I will never forget you, my love. You will never be a stranger to me "

The words hung heavy in the air, a spectral lament laced with a love that defied even the cruel hand of fate.

"Aw man, hate to break this moment," I spun around swiftly at the sound of a voice behind us, only to meet the gaze of our friend, Blaise.

he mumbled, a hint of worry lacing his usual cheerful tone. "Tried my best to eavesdrop, but their voices were practically inaudible. Y/N though!" His smile turned genuine, “There you are! I missed you like crazy, you have no idea! We were all so worried sick. I even had this whole big speech planned for your return, but…" He gestured theatrically to the grim scene around us, his facade crumbling a little. " I would have said it tears and all but we're attached, right now “

"Attached?" I whispered, the word barely audible against the storm of emotions churning inside me.

"Those vengeful witches," he muttered, his voice laced with regret. "They're not exactly thrilled with our little time-hopping adventure, or, you know, accidentally wiping out half their coven."

Gods above," I breathed, the weight of the situation crashing down upon me. My heart hammered a frantic rhythm against my ribs.

"Fear not, love," Matteo murmured, his hands seeking solace on my shoulders, a grounding anchor in the swirling vortex of emotions.

“I doubt that “blaise said

Blaise's comment hung heavy in the air, met by Matteo's silencing glare. Before Blaise could continue, Lorenzo materialized behind him, his voice a low rumble. "Enough, Zabini."

He ignored Blaise completely, pulling me into a warm embrace. "I missed you, smart girl l," he murmured. I squeezed him back, whispering a grateful "Thank you."

"We need to leave, Matt," Lorenzo said, his tone urgent. "This beast must be dealt with permanently."

Dread coiled in my stomach. I didn't need clarification on who "this beast" was.

"You kept him alive?" The question tumbled out before I could stop it.

A gentle smile touched mattheo's lips. "A life must be taken, my love. We can manipulate time, but not fate. And this fate won't be yours." He pressed a soft kiss to my forehead. "Just one more step, darling. Just one."

Suddenly, Sarah was beside me, her arms wrapping tightly around me. "Y/N! Oh my god, are you alright?"

Stepping back for a moment, I offered a reassuring smile. But before I could respond, Penny enveloped me in a hug.

"We were terrified," Penny confessed, her voice thick with emotion. I hugged her back, finding solace in their familiar warmth.

" I promise I wasn’t trying to steal your man , you have no idea how embarrassing it was to bring my childhood crush into the table but anything for you my girl " Julie admitted sheepishly. Her words brought a laugh to my lips, and I embraced her too.

Pulling away, I offered a quick hug to Theodore, who remained stoic, then turned to Blaise. "We'll discuss your speech later," I promised, remembering my earlier agreement.

Blaise cleared his throat. "Alright, now about these lunatics old me. who want us dead..."

"Bring them on," Mattheo interrupted, a fierce glint in his eyes. " beat the dog before the lion."

Lorenzo chuckled. "English, brother, please."

"They'll have two options," Mattheo continued, "Submit to our authority or face the consequences."

"What about your father?" Theodore asked, his voice laced with suspicion. "Are you certain he’s in our side ?"

"Anyone foolish enough to trust my father is in for a rude awakening," Mattheo replied wryly. "He may indulge me as his heir, but his true allegiance lies with the victor. A change in leadership in the council wouldn't be unwelcome in his eyes, so we just have to become the damn victors."

A knot of confusion tightened in my stomach. "I'm afraid I don't quite understand," I confessed. "Are you planning to take control of the council?"

mattheo squeezed my hand reassuringly. . "We already have control, my love. Now, it's just a matter of making it official."

Blaise, ever impatient, declared, "Let's get moving then. We have a beast to slay."

I saw the flicker of concern in their eyes, their apprehension about me facing the creature again. I spoke quickly, determined. "I'm coming with you. I want to see it done."

Their faces mirrored a mix of worry and protectiveness. Finally, Mattheo spoke, his touch gentle as he stroked circles on my hand. "Are you absolutely certain, love?"

I met his gaze, unwavering. "Absolutely."

"Then nothing will stand in your way," he whispered, his voice filled with unwavering devotion.

The familiar curve of the coastal road leading to my beach house unfolded before me, a route etched into my memory despite the unsettling emptiness it now evoked. The flames that devoured the house seemed to have consumed the memories held within its walls as well. I couldn't help but wonder what life would have been like if fate hadn't intervened. A life where my father lived, a life where fear didn't dictate my mother's every move, a life where she didn't cling to the illusion of a man's protection.

Consuming fury burned hotter than the inferno that had reduced the house to ashes. Five figures in black suits materialized outside the charred remains, a stark contrast to the desolate landscape.

"Seeking an audience, gentlemen?" Mattheo addressed them, his voice laced with steely resolve.

"Mattheo ," one acknowledged with a curt nod. "Perhaps it's time to restore the balance."

A sardonic smile played on mattheo’s lips. "The balance seems perfectly settled at the moment, wouldn't you agree?"

"Listen, boy," the man continued, "you've caused significant damage. Our men are dead, our houses burned, and a forbidden spell - one with potentially apocalyptic consequences - has been unleashed. You've tampered with time itself. We understand your position as heir apparent demands respect and loyalty, but the same goes for the protectors of this legacy."

"Your concern for my 'achievements' is touching," mattheo retorted, his voice dripping with sarcasm . "However, I'm afraid pressing matters require my immediate attention."

The men exchanged uneasy glances.

gestured towards the ravaged house mattheo said . "Join us, please."

Stepping inside the house was akin to revisiting a personal hell. This was the very place where I had bled out in my lover's arms, This was where I had endured constant torment, a battleground etched with the scars of physical and emotional abuse. The fire that consumed the structure wasn't a metaphor for my rage; it paled in comparison to the inferno burning within me.

Ten minutes from this moment, I had met my demise. Ten minutes from now, vengeance would be mine.

As soon as the men entered, Theo disappeared into a room and emerged moments later with the man who had ended my life cradled in his hands.

tossing him to the ground, his wide, terrified eyes locked on mine. Rage, a primal beast, clawed its way up my throat, threatening to consume me. But before I could surrender to its fury, a gentle hand encircled my neck, a soft kiss brushing my cheek.

"Perhaps our esteemed guests require no introduction to our...pet, wouldn't you agree, my love?" mattheo’s voice, resonated throughout the room.

Emboldened by his touch, I met Jason's gaze. "No introductions are necessary," I said, my voice surprisingly steady. "I believe they're quite familiar with him. Jason Katz, the pathetic, conniving cur."

This is the first time I've uttered my monster's name aloud. He appears so diminutive, so feeble, as if he's always been this way, but I was too afraid to notice.

A cruel smile played on my lips as I stepped closer to the trembling wretch, mattheo’s hand a reassuring weight on mine. The once-powerful figure of Lord Leopold Celestia's murderer now resembled a cornered rat.

"Jason," I began, relishing the power in his flinch at my first word, "you stand accused of murdering my father, Lord Leopold Celestia. Do you deny it?"

His reply, a garbled mess choked back by fear, was barely audible. "Princess, please... it was an accident I never wanted to hurt yo—."

"Do. You. Deny. It?" I repeated, each word laced with ice.

A flicker of defiance sparked in his eyes, quickly extinguished by Theo's steely gaze. "No," he whimpered, the mask of bravado finally crumbling. "I... I wanted his title."

"And my mother, Seraphina Celestia?" I pressed further, the truth a bitter pill to swallow. "Did you not strangle her in her own home, a viper slithering into her good graces after taking her husband from her? Do you deny that act of depravity?"

He squeezed his eyes shut, a strangled sob escaping his lips. "No... I don't."

"And finally," I continued, my voice a mere whisper, "three minutes from this very moment, you murdered me. After a failed attempt at a vile assault, you unleashed forbidden magic and stabbed me in the back. Like a coward ,Do you deny these accusations?"

A broken whimper. "No, princess. I..."

Taking a shaky breath, I looked at mattheo . Understanding flickered in his eyes, and without a word he understood, like he always did

, he handed me a dagger, its cold gleam a stark contrast to the devastation surrounding us.

Kneeling before Jason, I met his gaze, no longer filled with fear . "I told you," I said softly, a ghost of a smile playing on my lips, "you would die either way."

My eyes drifted to mattheo, searching for the signal – the moment of my past demise, to send another soul of my place.

"Burn in hell," I whispered, and with a slow, deliberate movement, I slit his throat. Slowly, enjoying every second, A struggle, a spray of crimson, and then... silence. He was dead, the blood staining my hands a grim reminder of the past.

I rose to my feet, the terrified men standing before me and Theo, his hand a comforting weight on my shoulder.

"Now," mattheo said, his voice calm yet laced with an underlying threat, amusement dancing in his eyes as he toyed with a lock of my hair. "Kneel."

A smirk tugged at my lips as I watched the men comply, their arrogance replaced by abject fear.

This was a new beginning. A surge of power, a dangerous cocktail of emotions coursed through me. But above all, there was the sweet taste of vengeance and the comforting press of mattheo’s hand against mine. Alive, in his arms, surrounded by our friends , we faced whatever the future held, together. Be it death, or a world yet to be shaped, we were ready.

•Epilogue

Tag list

@abaker74

@hereticdance

[boundwithpurple]

alicent for the character ask

How I feel about this character

i think the main core of a desperate unsaturated hunger i identify as the reason i love rhaenyra is key to alicent as well, its just a matter of being repressed, denied, turned septic. alicent too is starving for this connection and fulfillment and the course of her life makes it impossible to lay hold of and it transmutes to this seething poisonous fury. but the fury is there, the fury is important. alicent’s inability to ever completely buy into the broken bargain of the good girl and the good woman is always key. i love the more toxic forms it takes - the sheer nastiness of a sexualized desire to punish rhaenyra for her betrayal of aristocratic womanhood’s structuring contract, the need to finally make herself out of the life to whose making her life was sacrificed by crowning aegon and stripping rhaenyra of everything in a betrayal that destroys all involved - and how it is always balanced out by these constant fitful, incomplete jerks to honor another effaced life - her regret and horror at her own violence in 1.07, her taking rhaenyra’s hand in 1.08, the brutal selfishness which is also immense love in sparing rhaenyra’s life in 1.09, her entire grand disillusionment in s2. a wonderful and far more complex character than both her haters and fans seem to comprehend.

All the people I ship romantically with this character

rhaenyra. i have a deep fondness for her and daemon and contemplating both the triangulation at play in their twinned obsessions with rhaenyra and also how they could bond, on a continuum from antagonistically to productively under imagined AU scenarios, around their weird but unacknowledged similarities. i also ship alicent and all her kids - the thing of the emotionally stunted child bride and her inappropriately intense relationships with the children to whom her adolescence and young adulthood is subsumed to is a beautiful psychosexual stew, but my favorite is helaena with its sticky love that so easily can turn cloying and sour. also of course her father. and i wish her sexual awakening in s2 had been via larys sexually coercing her, not with criston.

My non-romantic OTP for this character

idk if i really have any. i guess i said alicent and viserys for viserys’ ask but something that is interesting to me about alicent is the inescapable and claustrophobic sexualization of all her relationships. sorry baby.

My unpopular opinion about this character

i guess my most recent one is her writing in s2 is good and i think people mad about her arc there are mad because they made up a character who never really existed. her entire life has never been her son, and her need to pursue redress through using him for political power in her own right is a thing that only came into being from specific circumstances (see her staunch support for rhaenyra up through 1.04) and is in complex conflict with other longings. this fixation with aegon’s cause was something forced on her she has tried to redeem and find meaning in, but it is always doing war with her desire and love for rhaenyra. that is the text of the show itself - see above. the ten years of her alienation from rhaenyra which in part flows from a belief she cannot trust her, even if alicent’s perception of that broken trust stems from a misogynistic framework of women’s political honor being bound up in sexual continence, is actually a minor portion of both her life and more importantly the show itself, as it only lasts for two episodes.

even in s1, in 1.08, she yearns after something different. her neurotic edge of breakdown/breakdown in 1.06/7 is not from the success of her repression but its failure: she is always fatally split. she tries to have it all and crown her son and attain a political existence and irrevocably compromises it instantly by sparing rhaenyra’s life because she can never, ever, actually put her children before her the love of her own lost childhood and what it signifies to her. and it dooms her children, and she realizes it when she sees aegon’s burnt body after rook’s rest and also believes he is no longer a king because he is no longer a king she can make herself through. 2.08 actually makes perfect sense if you’ve watched the show, where she now condemns aegon to try to save the child she feels she can save and crown rhaenyra and continues on her path to dooming them all because of this primal, irresolvable split between the life others ordained for her and her own selfhood.

One thing I wish would happen / had happened with this character in canon

all that said my problem with 2.08 is not its content but its pacing - i’m worried they played this hand too soon and now i am kind of baffled where they are going to go with alicent! so my answer is…i don’t know!

[accardi-x]

Alita: Euphoria

I want to feel you. Every breath, every muscle, every vein. To feel your heartbeat in a continuum of mine is a delight I wish to feel.

Might have mentions of stalking, obsessive behavior, possessiveness, insinuation of addiction, unhealthy dependency, toxic dynamic, yandere themes, Murder, etc.

If you're uncomfortable with anything listed above, then I advise not to read further. If you wish to continue know that you've been warned.

—

Iron City's air was as dense as a marsh. Polluted with smoke that frisks the air with its toxins. Invading the lungs with its bitter and suffocating pulp.

There was never a quiet night; a whistle, clanking of metal, the buzzing of motors.

A fitting name. To a town that never sleeps.

The light of the moon cascaded onto her letting her metallic body refract its purity. She looked over the railings with a twinkle in her eye. She'd already prolonged this event long enough. Finally adequate enough to proceed.

With a twist of her heel, she turned to lift the window being careful not to alert anyone. Once open, she peered in, her eyes scanning the room before landing on a blanketed form.

With one swift motion she entered, her eyes never leaving them. With each step, the pumping of her heart quickened.

She stopped before the bed frame, her body leaning forward to hover over the bed. Raising her hand her fingers clasping onto the blanket, carefully removing it to reveal the face she longed to see.

Letting go of the fabric, her hand subtly passed through your hair, her sensors finally able to pick up your touch.

Before, It was hard to recognize how you felt; plastic provided a barrier to feel you, and yet, with this new body, she still wanted more. A want to connect with yours sparked in her mind. To fuse with you. To feel your blood pump into her tubes was what she wished. Your flesh and blood, oh how it exhilarated her.

With each thought, her subtle touch pressured onto your head, waking you up in a frenzy. Your heart pumped in fear your eyes locking with hers.

Your mouth parted, wanting to scream for help but, not even a noise could escape as she quickly clasped her hands on your mouth.

Each muscle in your body wanted to shove her off of you. To keep her away from you. But it was useless. With each jerk of your body, she grounded you to the bed with enough force to prevent you from moving.

Your eyes filled with pure fear, already knowing that your defenseless body was not a match for a cyborg.

" the pain is only momentarily. Soon we'll be infused into one another."

She spoke, Her voice filled to the brim with madness sending shockwaves of fear through your body. Your ears couldn't even register that what she said was intended to comfort you. But comfort was only in her point of view, not yours.

Her body twitched as her sharpened fingers penetrated the skin on your neck.

All you could do was gargle a scream of pain, but in her mind, it was one of delight. Oh, how she anticipated this event.

Word Count: 464

• Hasn't been checked for grammar, nor has it been proofread.

• I'll also like to mention that English isn't my first language so I apologize if there is any error in my writing.

PS: this piece is rushed, as is evident in the flow of the writing.

[sapphosremains]

How do you reconcile your beliefs and the unsavoury parts of the Bible? I'm struggling with that

Hey anon!

I won't lie, it's not easy. I think the first step is to accept it.

"If you are a feminist, you cannot give allegiance to the Bible. You may teach it as an academic subject, but you cannot approve of it or identify with it. You must choose between feminism and that patriarchal book." This quote was said by a prominent feminist theologian to Phyllis Trible, author of Texts of Terror. Trible begins her foreword to the follow-up book Texts of Terror: Rhetoric, Gender, and Violence with this quote, going on to explain her approach to it. She writes: "I was asking myself what to do with texts that are not only male dominated but also openly violate women. If I love the Bible, I am compelled to struggle with these negatives." The first piece of advice she received on the topic was that "to retell such stories on behalf of the victims could itself be redemptive." This was borne through after she lectured on Judges 19, when "an unnamed woman approached me with tears flowing. She said, “I did not know that the Bible had a story like that. I myself have been gang raped, psychologically murdered and dismembered. To hear now that the Bible tells my story begins my healing.” I was stunned at the working of the Spirit in and through this woman as she listened to and appropriated the biblical story."

To begin to deal with the difficulties that 'unsavoury' biblical stories present us with, we must first accept them. The introduction in Terror continues:

"some of these stories have proven to validate and sanctify violence, triggering trauma in women, men, and children; the culturally and ethnically minoritized; and those excluded from mainstream cultures due to gender, sexual orientation, disability, or disease, to name a few. The many broken and bruised bodies of victims in biblical narratives speak into the material contexts of varied tyrannies, validating and sanctifying racism, sexism, colorism, caste oppression, classism, colonialism, and heteronormativity."

Trible suggests that we can "read these texts in memoriam—in memory of these abused, victimized, violated, dehumanized, nameless, and murdered characters, and in continuum with similar victims today."

That is one approach. However, what do we do when the Bible actively rewards violence? The example that springs to mind from my own work is Numbers 25, and the story of Cozbi, a woman murdered by Phinehas, who then receives a covenant for his violence. What do we do in the face of a God who rewards femicide? What do we do when we read our holy text and our stomachs turn? What do we do when our religion, of radical love and liberation, supports murder of someone different to us, in Numbers 25, or in the brutal rape, murder, and desecration of a woman in Judges 19, says... very little?

The first thing we need to consider is the context. The Old Testament (I'm using OT instead of Hebrew Bible here to account for the different books, and Christian interpretation) was written for the Israelites. It was not written to convert, therefore it did not need to be savoury. It was written as a history, to unite the tribes of Israel, and to document the history of their peoples and their God, and history is not savoury. History contains bad people who do bad things, and if someone were to write a history of Christian people now, I think it would appear just as unsavoury... With this, two more considerations.

The Bible is not the direct word of God. It is inspired by God, and you may believe whatever you like about its inerrancy and infallibility, but Christians are not required to believe that the Bible is, word for word, by God. God did not dictate the Bible, in contrast to, say, Islam, which believes that the Qur'an was dictated by God to Muhammad.

The Bible is not a law book. It has law books, and history books, and prophecy books, etc etc, but the Bible is not a list of rules. Not everything in the Bible is the expectation of behaviour for Christians - some things are just history.

This addresses stories such as Judges 19, where the Bible does not pass an exact judgement, but it does not solve our issue where Cozbi is our example, where God seems to endorse this violence. Again, a two part address.

New Testament. Christians must not forget the OT, but we must remember the importance of the NT. Above all, the two greatest commandments, as said by God himself, are: love your God, and love your neighbour. That's it.

Different standards. Today, it is not normal to go around killing people. We have different forms of punishment that are more common - we imprison people, we ostracise people, we 'cancel' them.

More practical suggestions:

Take the difficult texts gently. You do not need to read them all together. Read the uplifting texts, the hopeful texts, the ones that fill you with joy.

Remember that we are honoured to have access to a religious text with such a long history, but that the events detailed in the OT happened around 2000BC - 4000 years ago! Authors start writing and compiling the texts together to give us our first complete OT around 2000 years ago. As relevant as the Bible is to our modern lives (very), we must remember what a different world it was written in and for.

Pray over difficult segments. This is God's word, His message to His people - He will not leave you stranded trying to decipher it. "Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and do not rely on your own insight." Proverbs 3:5

I hope this helps a little. Sorry that it was so long, with no easy answers! If you'd like to read Terror, see this link. I cannot recommend it enough. If I could recommend a single book for theology, this is what I would give, every single time. I will say though, it is not a light read. Please be heavily warned!

God bless you all, and please continue to reach out if there's anything I can do.