#cost function in deep learning

[rhsofttech2023]

A Guide to SAP HCM Online Training in India

[michanvalentine]

Sorry, but this whole thing about the dice roll to convince Astarion not to ascend—let’s break it down.

The dice roll exists because Astarion is intoxicated—by blood, by fear, by power. Power is the only thing he thinks can set him free, but only because his perspective is painfully limited. The Insight check isn’t there by accident; it’s meant to give the player context. Astarion isn’t thinking clearly—not enough to truly reason.

Do you know what real fear does? It shuts down higher cognitive processes. The sympathetic nervous system takes over, triggering fight, flight, freeze, or fawn responses. Blood rushes to the muscles, the heart, the lungs, preparing the body to react quickly in case of danger. But at the same time, other functions that aren’t immediately useful—like digestion, excretory system, sexual function, and, yes, logical reasoning—get suppressed. It’s a matter of priorities—survival over everything else.

For example, studies show that reprimanding a child too harshly—scaring them—actually inhibits learning, making it completely counterproductive.

And in that moment, Astarion is like someone standing on the edge of a rooftop, ready to jump—not because he wants to die, but because he sees no other way out of his pain. And Tav/Durge is the damn firefighter or cop trying to talk him down before he hits the pavement.

And honestly—who here hasn’t had a conversation with a parent, a friend, or a teacher, only to later think, Shit, they were right, I was about to do something really stupid?

It’s not coercion, people. It’s just pointing things out. And the dice roll is there to break through all the things clouding Astarion’s mind—blood, fear, and everything in between. Not to convince him.

At this point in the adventure, Astarion is perfectly capable of making his own choices, and if he's deprived of that choice, he gets so furious that he attacks the player. In fact, if you categorically decide for him—either by refusing to help him or by interrupting the ritual—things end badly. He is the one who has to decide what to do, not the player.

It's no coincidence that Astarion gives his approval at the moment he realizes what it truly means to ascend and abandons the ritual. There's no lie there; we don't forget that approval. Just as it's no accident that, in the cemetery scene, Astarion says he feels seen by the player. Because yes—beyond the illusory veil of a sexy, evil vampire, we've seen through it and witnessed something else. We've seen the goodness within him.

Please, let's stop saying that Astarion wants to ascend at all costs and that he's forced not to do it. Otherwise, the reading of the game's and the character's subtext is completely lost. And note that this doesn't mean he doesn't also have the potential for evil.

It's exactly these internal contradictions—this constant oscillation between good and evil—that make him such a deep, well-rounded, and wonderful character. Please, let's not simplify him; that would be a crime.

[cressidagrey]

Like Origami

Pairing: Oscar Piastri x Felicity Leong-Piastri (Original Character)

Part of the The mysterious Mrs. Piastri Series.

Summary:   Felicity folds their lives around Oscar’s. 

Warnings and Notes: Big thanks to @llirawolf , who listens to me ramble 😂

Oscar had always known that being an F1 driver came with a cost.

Time, mostly. Energy. Pieces of himself chipped away across continents — interviews, debriefs, simulator hours, long-haul flights that blurred the edges of his life into airport lounges and hotel lobbies. 

He missed sleep. He missed Bedtime. He missed Bee’s first attempt at drawing a cat (which looked more like a haunted pancake). He missed days at home with Felicity. 

But it never really broke him.

Because Felicity never let it.

Being an F1 driver required everything. His time. His focus. His body. His brain. It asked for obsession and then demanded more. And somehow, Felicity had folded their entire life around it — not like a sacrifice, but like origami. Seamless. Beautiful. Functional.

Their schedules bent around his. Flights arranged, appointments timed, Bee’s activities slotted into neat little windows that didn’t collide with debriefs or simulator days or media obligations. The chaos of the racing calendar never touched him at home — because Felicity had already smoothed it out.

She handled the mortgage and the taxes and the kindergarten applications. She learned the structure of F1 contracts before he even signed his first one. Their fridge always had the right snacks, Bee always had backup outfits in her cubby at Kindergarten, and Oscar never, ever had to think about whether they were low on laundry detergent.

The garden bloomed when he was home. Dinners appeared like magic. Bee’s schedule adjusted itself so he could still read her a bedtime story before she fell asleep drooling on his shoulder. The house was calm. Meals were warm. The only thing he ever had to remember was where his slippers were.

Oscar never asked Felicity to built their lives around his.

She just did it.

Without fanfare. Without passive-aggressive remarks or pointed silences. Felicity folded their entire world into a rhythm that let him chase speed while never falling apart.

There were meals in the freezer labeled with dates and instructions. Garden vegetables cleaned, chopped, and tucked into glass containers. His race gear was always washed, his vitamins stocked, his passport renewed before he even thought to check. When he came home, the house felt like a deep breath. Like rest.

When he was home, she never handed him a to-do list.

She handed him their daughter.

And that was it.

He didn’t have to manage groceries or bills or appointments. He didn’t have to double-check if Bee had clean socks or if the chickens had eaten or if the plumber was coming Thursday. He didn’t even have to pack his kit —because Felicity had already done it, tucked a protein bar into the side pocket and added a hand-written note.

No expectation to fix the fence or organise the pantry or figure out why the hot water pressure was acting up in the guest shower. She’d already handled it. Or would. What she needed was him. 

Just him. Present and soft and theirs.

Oscar didn’t know how to explain it to people who hadn’t lived it. Who hadn’t walked through the door at 1 a.m. after a red-eye and found their home warm and humming, their child asleep in a bed full of storybooks and dreams, and their wife sitting at the kitchen table with tea and a smile that made him forget every horrible session that came before.

All he had to do was come home and be.

Be Bee’s dad. Be Felicity’s husband. Be the quiet, tired, grateful version of himself that only existed within their walls. The one who didn’t have to be sharp-edged or interview-ready. The one who could collapse on the floor and let his daughter crawl onto his back mid-storytime. 

Felicity had made a life that worked around his — so that when he walked back into it, he wasn’t expected to fix or lead or plan.

He was expected to rest.

To hold Bee.

To breathe.

He’d never asked Felicity to do any of it. She just did.

She learned what days he needed quiet. She knew when he was withdrawing too far into his own head. She knew how to keep the house humming while giving him space to exhale — without making him feel like he was failing for needing it.

And that was what broke him, sometimes. Quietly. Privately.

Because Felicity never made him feel like a burden. Never held it over his head. Never once made him feel like she’d put her life on hold for his.

But she had.

Not because she was dependent.

Because she chose to.

Because she loved him.

Because she believed in him enough to bend the edges of their world so that, when he came home, all he had to do was walk through the door and exist.

Oscar wasn’t naïve. He knew she was brilliant. That she could be doing anything. That she could be running companies or winning awards or building something extraordinary in her own right. And in some ways, she already was.

Because their life — their quiet, beautiful, functioning, chaotic life — was something only Felicity could’ve built.

And he would spend the rest of his life making sure she knew he saw it.

Even if she never asked him to.

He didn’t know how to repay that. Not with wins. Not with flowers. 

But every time she curled into his side at night, every time Bee reached for him with sticky fingers and sleepy eyes, Oscar knew one thing for certain:

The only thing he had to do now — the only thing he wanted to do — was show up for them, again and again, and never, ever forget what it took to make this possible.

Felicity held up their life like it was nothing.

And that made it everything.

***

Oscar realized it while sitting at the kitchen counter, barefoot and still damp from his post-run shower, a half-drunk protein shake sweating beside his laptop. The house was quiet—Bee at kindergarten, Felicity out in the garden talking to the hens like they were co-workers—and he was meant to be going through the calendar Mark had sent over. Just blocking out dates, syncing with Felicity’s schedule, adding a few notes.

He scrolled.

Paused.

Scrolled back.

July 21st. Hungarian Grand Prix. Bee’s birthday.

His stomach dropped.

He stared at the screen like it might change, like maybe the dates would shift if he just blinked hard enough. But they didn’t. The 21st stayed where it was, bright and bold, nestled between two practice days and a press briefing.

Bee was turning four.

Four. The age where memories stuck like glue. Where birthdays became important—not just cake and balloons, but promises. Traditions. She’d been talking about it for months. Sea-themed cupcakes. A dolphin-shaped cake. A sparkly blue dress.

And he’d nodded, said “I’ll be there, Bumblebee,” without realizing the truth sitting quietly in his own damn schedule.

The guilt hit him like a sucker punch—instant, sharp, and mean.

He didn’t even remember walking out to the garden. Just the disjointed blur of grabbing his phone, sliding open the back door, and calling out, “Fliss?”

Felicity turned from where she knelt by the herb beds, sunhat perched on her head, dirt smudged on her wrist. “Everything okay?”

“I need to talk to you.”

She wiped her hands on her jeans “Oscar?”

His voice cracked a little. “Hungary’s on Bee’s birthday.”

There was a beat of silence.

“I didn’t realize,” he said. “God, I didn’t realize, and now I feel like the worst—I promised her, Fliss, I told her I’d be there—”

“Hey,” she interrupted, standing now, brushing grass off her knees. “Breathe.”

“I was supposed to be there,” he said again, softer this time. “She’s been planning it for months. The dolphin cake, the cupcakes, the balloons—and I just—how did I miss it?”

“You didn’t,” Felicity said gently. “You’re just juggling a hundred other things. But you’re not missing it.”

He blinked. “What?”

She smiled, walking toward him across the grass, sunlight catching the gold chain around her neck. “I already booked the flights.”

Oscar just stared at her.

“I figured it out last week,” she added. “Called Mark, sorted the paddock passes. Bee’s excited about it. She wants to wear her dolphin dress to the track and bring cupcakes for the engineers.”

He was stunned. “You’re serious?”

“Of course I’m serious,” she said. “You’re her dad. You don’t miss her birthday unless you’re in space. We’ll come to you. It’s just geography.”

“But—race weekend—media—timings—”

Felicity reached for his hand. “She doesn’t care about any of that. She wants her papa to sing ‘Happy Birthday’ slightly off-key and help her blow out candles. That’s what matters.”

Oscar scrubbed a hand over his face, suddenly breathless with love and relief and the unbearable ache of it all. “How do you always fix everything?”

Felicity shrugged. “Because I know you. And I know her.”

And just like that, the weight lifted.

He’d still be racing that weekend. Still chasing tenths and points and podiums.

But when Bee turned four, Oscar wouldn’t be missing him.

[treasure-mimic]

So, let me try and put everything together here, because I really do think it needs to be talked about.

Today, Unity announced that it intends to apply a fee to use its software. Then it got worse.

For those not in the know, Unity is the most popular free to use video game development tool, offering a basic version for individuals who want to learn how to create games or create independently alongside paid versions for corporations or people who want more features. It's decent enough at this job, has issues but for the price point I can't complain, and is the idea entry point into creating in this medium, it's a very important piece of software.

But speaking of tools, the CEO is a massive one. When he was the COO of EA, he advocated for using, what out and out sounds like emotional manipulation to coerce players into microtransactions.

"A consumer gets engaged in a property, they might spend 10, 20, 30, 50 hours on the game and then when they're deep into the game they're well invested in it. We're not gouging, but we're charging and at that point in time the commitment can be pretty high."

He also called game developers who don't discuss monetization early in the planning stages of development, quote, "fucking idiots".

So that sets the stage for what might be one of the most bald-faced greediest moves I've seen from a corporation in a minute. Most at least have the sense of self-preservation to hide it.

A few hours ago, Unity posted this announcement on the official blog.

Effective January 1, 2024, we will introduce a new Unity Runtime Fee that’s based on game installs. We will also add cloud-based asset storage, Unity DevOps tools, and AI at runtime at no extra cost to Unity subscription plans this November. We are introducing a Unity Runtime Fee that is based upon each time a qualifying game is downloaded by an end user. We chose this because each time a game is downloaded, the Unity Runtime is also installed. Also we believe that an initial install-based fee allows creators to keep the ongoing financial gains from player engagement, unlike a revenue share.

Now there are a few red flags to note in this pitch immediately.

Unity is planning on charging a fee on all games which use its engine.

This is a flat fee per number of installs.

They are using an always online runtime function to determine whether a game is downloaded.

There is just so many things wrong with this that it's hard to know where to start, not helped by this FAQ which doubled down on a lot of the major issues people had.

I guess let's start with what people noticed first. Because it's using a system baked into the software itself, Unity would not be differentiating between a "purchase" and a "download". If someone uninstalls and reinstalls a game, that's two downloads. If someone gets a new computer or a new console and downloads a game already purchased from their account, that's two download. If someone pirates the game, the studio will be asked to pay for that download.

Q: How are you going to collect installs? A: We leverage our own proprietary data model. We believe it gives an accurate determination of the number of times the runtime is distributed for a given project. Q: Is software made in unity going to be calling home to unity whenever it's ran, even for enterprice licenses? A: We use a composite model for counting runtime installs that collects data from numerous sources. The Unity Runtime Fee will use data in compliance with GDPR and CCPA. The data being requested is aggregated and is being used for billing purposes. Q: If a user reinstalls/redownloads a game / changes their hardware, will that count as multiple installs? A: Yes. The creator will need to pay for all future installs. The reason is that Unity doesn’t receive end-player information, just aggregate data. Q: What's going to stop us being charged for pirated copies of our games? A: We do already have fraud detection practices in our Ads technology which is solving a similar problem, so we will leverage that know-how as a starting point. We recognize that users will have concerns about this and we will make available a process for them to submit their concerns to our fraud compliance team.

This is potentially related to a new system that will require Unity Personal developers to go online at least once every three days.

Starting in November, Unity Personal users will get a new sign-in and online user experience. Users will need to be signed into the Hub with their Unity ID and connect to the internet to use Unity. If the internet connection is lost, users can continue using Unity for up to 3 days while offline. More details to come, when this change takes effect.

It's unclear whether this requirement will be attached to any and all Unity games, though it would explain how they're theoretically able to track "the number of installs", and why the methodology for tracking these installs is so shit, as we'll discuss later.

Unity claims that it will only leverage this fee to games which surpass a certain threshold of downloads and yearly revenue.

Only games that meet the following thresholds qualify for the Unity Runtime Fee: Unity Personal and Unity Plus: Those that have made $200,000 USD or more in the last 12 months AND have at least 200,000 lifetime game installs. Unity Pro and Unity Enterprise: Those that have made $1,000,000 USD or more in the last 12 months AND have at least 1,000,000 lifetime game installs.

They don't say how they're going to collect information on a game's revenue, likely this is just to say that they're only interested in squeezing larger products (games like Genshin Impact and Honkai: Star Rail, Fate Grand Order, Among Us, and Fall Guys) and not every 2 dollar puzzle platformer that drops on Steam. But also, these larger products have the easiest time porting off of Unity and the most incentives to, meaning realistically those heaviest impacted are going to be the ones who just barely meet this threshold, most of them indie developers.

Aggro Crab Games, one of the first to properly break this story, points out that systems like the Xbox Game Pass, which is already pretty predatory towards smaller developers, will quickly inflate their "lifetime game installs" meaning even skimming the threshold of that 200k revenue, will be asked to pay a fee per install, not a percentage on said revenue.

[IMAGE DESCRIPTION: Hey Gamers!

Today, Unity (the engine we use to make our games) announced that they'll soon be taking a fee from developers for every copy of the game installed over a certain threshold - regardless of how that copy was obtained.

Guess who has a somewhat highly anticipated game coming to Xbox Game Pass in 2024? That's right, it's us and a lot of other developers.

That means Another Crab's Treasure will be free to install for the 25 million Game Pass subscribers. If a fraction of those users download our game, Unity could take a fee that puts an enormous dent in our income and threatens the sustainability of our business.

And that's before we even think about sales on other platforms, or pirated installs of our game, or even multiple installs by the same user!!!

This decision puts us and countless other studios in a position where we might not be able to justify using Unity for our future titles. If these changes aren't rolled back, we'll be heavily considering abandoning our wealth of Unity expertise we've accumulated over the years and starting from scratch in a new engine. Which is really something we'd rather not do.

On behalf of the dev community, we're calling on Unity to reverse the latest in a string of shortsighted decisions that seem to prioritize shareholders over their product's actual users.

I fucking hate it here.

-Aggro Crab - END DESCRIPTION]

That fee, by the way, is a flat fee. Not a percentage, not a royalty. This means that any games made in Unity expecting any kind of success are heavily incentivized to cost as much as possible.

[IMAGE DESCRIPTION: A table listing the various fees by number of Installs over the Install Threshold vs. version of Unity used, ranging from $0.01 to $0.20 per install. END DESCRIPTION]

Basic elementary school math tells us that if a game comes out for $1.99, they will be paying, at maximum, 10% of their revenue to Unity, whereas jacking the price up to $59.99 lowers that percentage to something closer to 0.3%. Obviously any company, especially any company in financial desperation, which a sudden anchor on all your revenue is going to create, is going to choose the latter.

Furthermore, and following the trend of "fuck anyone who doesn't ask for money", Unity helpfully defines what an install is on their main site.

While I'm looking at this page as it exists now, it currently says

The installation and initialization of a game or app on an end user’s device as well as distribution via streaming is considered an “install.” Games or apps with substantially similar content may be counted as one project, with installs then aggregated to calculate the Unity Runtime Fee.

However, I saw a screenshot saying something different, and utilizing the Wayback Machine we can see that this phrasing was changed at some point in the few hours since this announcement went up. Instead, it reads:

The installation and initialization of a game or app on an end user’s device as well as distribution via streaming or web browser is considered an “install.” Games or apps with substantially similar content may be counted as one project, with installs then aggregated to calculate the Unity Runtime Fee.

Screenshot for posterity:

That would mean web browser games made in Unity would count towards this install threshold. You could legitimately drive the count up simply by continuously refreshing the page. The FAQ, again, doubles down.

Q: Does this affect WebGL and streamed games? A: Games on all platforms are eligible for the fee but will only incur costs if both the install and revenue thresholds are crossed. Installs - which involves initialization of the runtime on a client device - are counted on all platforms the same way (WebGL and streaming included).

And, what I personally consider to be the most suspect claim in this entire debacle, they claim that "lifetime installs" includes installs prior to this change going into effect.

Will this fee apply to games using Unity Runtime that are already on the market on January 1, 2024? Yes, the fee applies to eligible games currently in market that continue to distribute the runtime. We look at a game's lifetime installs to determine eligibility for the runtime fee. Then we bill the runtime fee based on all new installs that occur after January 1, 2024.

Again, again, doubled down in the FAQ.

Q: Are these fees going to apply to games which have been out for years already? If you met the threshold 2 years ago, you'll start owing for any installs monthly from January, no? (in theory). It says they'll use previous installs to determine threshold eligibility & then you'll start owing them for the new ones. A: Yes, assuming the game is eligible and distributing the Unity Runtime then runtime fees will apply. We look at a game's lifetime installs to determine eligibility for the runtime fee. Then we bill the runtime fee based on all new installs that occur after January 1, 2024.

That would involve billing companies for using their software before telling them of the existence of a bill. Holding their actions to a contract that they performed before the contract existed!

Okay. I think that's everything. So far.

There is one thing that I want to mention before ending this post, unfortunately it's a little conspiratorial, but it's so hard to believe that anyone genuinely thought this was a good idea that it's stuck in my brain as a significant possibility.

A few days ago it was reported that Unity's CEO sold 2,000 shares of his own company.

On September 6, 2023, John Riccitiello, President and CEO of Unity Software Inc (NYSE:U), sold 2,000 shares of the company. This move is part of a larger trend for the insider, who over the past year has sold a total of 50,610 shares and purchased none.

I would not be surprised if this decision gets reversed tomorrow, that it was literally only made for the CEO to short his own goddamn company, because I would sooner believe that this whole thing is some idiotic attempt at committing fraud than a real monetization strategy, even knowing how unfathomably greedy these people can be.

So, with all that said, what do we do now?

Well, in all likelihood you won't need to do anything. As I said, some of the biggest names in the industry would be directly affected by this change, and you can bet your bottom dollar that they're not just going to take it lying down. After all, the only way to stop a greedy CEO is with a greedier CEO, right?

(I fucking hate it here.)

And that's not mentioning the indie devs who are already talking about abandoning the engine.

[Links display tweets from the lead developer of Among Us saying it'd be less costly to hire people to move the game off of Unity and Cult of the Lamb's official twitter saying the game won't be available after January 1st in response to the news.]

That being said, I'm still shaken by all this. The fact that Unity is openly willing to go back and punish its developers for ever having used the engine in the past makes me question my relationship to it.

The news has given rise to the visibility of free, open source alternative Godot, which, if you're interested, is likely a better option than Unity at this point. Mostly, though, I just hope we can get out of this whole, fucking, environment where creatives are treated as an endless mill of free profits that's going to be continuously ratcheted up and up to drive unsustainable infinite corporate growth that our entire economy is based on for some fuckin reason.

Anyways, that's that, I find having these big posts that break everything down to be helpful.

[blueskittlesart]

also, do you think ralsei is the darkner version of the devil horn headband kris used to wear, and, if so, what do you think this says about the two of them?

i think that's definitely the most likely answer at this point, though it wouldn't really explain why the hell he functions differently than other darkners and can appear outside castle town of his own accord without petrifying. (unless he's similar to kris's knife and somehow exists in their inventory at all times while also being invisible to the player?) It's entirely possible that he's something else, but bare minimum it would explain why he looks so similar to the rest of kris's family and the blatant self-esteem issues he has. It's definitely interesting to think that the all-knowing magic-using tutorial character of this game, the one who guides kris through this unfamiliar world and the only healer in the party for the majority of the first few chapters, is someone born from kris's own insecurity over how out of place they feel in their own family. Assuming ralsei IS kris's headband, then his choice to hide his face during the first chapter, his insistence that he exists purely to help lightners and doesn't "deserve" to have his own wants and feelings, his fear over what will happen if kris and susie learn the full truth of the prophecy, even his encouragement that the player recruit enemies to castle town rather than using violence all take on a slightly different meaning. his insecurity can be inferred to stem from kris's own--he is an object literally representative of the fact that they are the odd one out both in hometown and in their own family. He is a desperate attempt to fit in, to make oneself what is expected. And by extension he is also representative of a deep, painful loneliness that comes with never seeing anyone else that looks like you. His passive nature and the things he keeps from kris and susie are the effect of something built deep into the core of ralsei as an object; the need to conform, to make yourself palatable and to not cause problems for the people you care about. to make people forget that you're the odd one out. to be what you're 'supposed' to be, no matter the cost. And recruiting darkners to castle town is a way to give ralsei people like him to come home to, something that kris never had.

[mbari-blog]

We’ve got our eyes on you 👀

Using 3D imaging and computational modeling, researchers from The University of Western Australia, the UWA Oceans Institute, the Smithsonian’s National Museum of Natural History, and MBARI compared the structure and function of the eyes of hyperiid amphipods, shrimp-like crustaceans that dwell in the dim waters of the ocean’s twilight zone. 

Hyperia has evolved eyes that keep watch on a wide field of view but can only visualize objects nearby. Phronima—commonly known as the barrel amphipod—can see well into the distance, but at the cost of a very narrow field of view. Phronima has solved this problem by evolving a second pair of eyes for wide, but poor, peripheral vision. 

Learn more about the barrel amphipod in our Animals of the Deep gallery.

Images courtesy of MBARI Adjunct Karen Osborn, Smithsonian Institution

[yuri-is-online]

Jade falling in love for the first time and being an absolute loser simp about it.

Yuu lives in his head and fantasies rent free; he can't get enough of them. He wrote about them in his diary (one with a lock on it because floyd likes to snoop). He needs them so bad. It's like that one meme where the girl is like "I need him in a way that's concerning to feminism". He's so desperate someone help him.

Bro has innocent little fantasies of them together, like Yuu waking up beside him and peppering his face in sweet little kisses while he tries to hold them closer and convince them to stay in bed for 5 more minutes (it never really does just end up being 5 minutes though), and then his thoughts just take a sharp turn and what was a sweet little daydream has turned into thoughts of him softly and sleepily fucking Yuu into his mattress. He didn't get to go back to sleep but he's not complaining about it if this is the cost he's paying. The world us cold and hard but you're soft and warm and if fantasies are the closest he's getting to that peace then so be it

He is one jealous eel (he is in deep denial about this but us slowly starting to realize just how far deep into this he us and he really doesn't want to acknowledge that), and he get the most jealous over the most innocent shit too. One day he sees Yuu and Epel talking in a language he doesn't recognize and he's like ???, and it turns out it's their native language but it doesn't exist here so he can't learn it dammit. He sees them struggling to do something and look around the library for help, skipping right over him and asking Ace ir Deuce for help. They've even picked Leona for help before him! Seriously he is RIGHT HERE! what can any of them do for Yuu that he can't?!

Jade has to be careful with his merform around them. Partially because everytime Yuu walks into the room his body suddenly decides to cosplay a laser rave, but also because he's been overthinking shit recently. Yuu is a human, painfully so. They're expecting a human courtship and a human marriage and a human family and a human life and. He can't give that to them. Not unless he stays on land forever, which he might be able to do, but realistically he wouldn't want to. So that leaves Yuu coming to the coral sea where it's cold and dark and he just can't see Yuu doing something like that (he's wrong you've wanted to be a mermaid ever since your cousin made you watch H2O when you were like 7), so now he just trys to be as human as possible around you so he doesn't scare you off.

Also there's the fact that every time spring transitions into summer and he's stuck in his merfirm for the next week and a half and now you really can't see him like this because if he sees you then you're going to be dragged into the water so fast with an 12 foot long eel wrapped around you while he desperately tries to stop himself from being too desperate and start rutting against you and- Oh great seven he's so sorry-

Oh, you like that? Your bringing his face to your neck and fuck you smell so nice and he's biting down and tearing your clothes apart with his claws before he knows what's going on and your legs are wrapping around his tail and-

... Grotto. Where's the grotto he had picked out? He was just in it where is it?

Jade asks you for art supplies in one of his birthday lines so he can draw while he hikes. His "diary" is something Floyd took an interest in once upon a time until he saw it full of mushrooms, rocks, and mountains. Jade still puts a lock on it because he finds it funny looking, but there's more than just mushrooms in there now. Need he's not merely in love he's in need of you and it's affecting his ability to function.

If he wakes up alone in his dreams he will find you in the kitchen, trying to hurry up and make your tea so you can so you can surprise him for once. It never works as he's able to trap you against the counter and breathe down your neck, winding himself around you as you laugh the pure music that he thinks your laugh would sound like as he presses into you so you can feel how much he wanted to to be next to you this morning. How troublesome that he had to go find you and draw out his suffering, not to fret. He loves you so, there's no reason to worry that he won't be gentle with how he lowers you down onto the counter, he'll still prepare you softly but he won't be slow in how he takes you-

He's slow to return to wakefulness, he doesn't mind the cold because it makes him feel at home but he does not like being alone. Loving you is a lot like losing you because he becomes so aware of how he is alone. Jade sees himself as a good person to ask for help, he does not think he is wrong in his benevolence but perhaps that's exactly the problem. Perhaps you know what trifling thing he is working towards obtaining and find him unworthy, Epel can speak to you in ways he can't (to ask you to teach him your speech is an option of course but he knows it's too intimate a thing to ask of you now), those fools found you first and treasured you when he made the awful, idiotic mistake of thinking you boring so of course you would see him in the same way. Of course you would feel safer asking things of Leona, he's the one who saved you while Jade was helping Azul drown you and it's not like he did much to make you see him when you stumbled into the Lounge running away from Jamil. You asked Leona for help, you came to them by accident, and Floyd was the one who got to carry you. Something he definitely didn't make fun of him of him for being jealous about. "Ya got to wake your mate up and see what they looked like sleepin' wasn't that nice?" Oh how he hard he wanted to punch his brother for that. So he did. It made him feel much better.

It takes time but he manages to weave his way into your orbit. He gets to see more of you, and he feels conflicted. The octotrio has gotten to see a lot of humanity, and they feel like they have enough of a grasp on them to conduct their business. That's something that certainly contributed to his thinking of you as boring of course but well. The more he sees of you now the more he realizes how little he really knows about humanity and the surface, he might not see the appeal of the surface world but he sees the appeal of you. Still he knows he wouldn't be happy if he stayed on it forever, how could he possibly ask the same of you? There's barely any sunlight under the water and humans need that to survive... he's done his research on corners of the internet he would have just laughed at before he fell for you and he knows what they say. That humans and merfolk only seldom stay together in the way that he wants, that they find his sort of merfolk to be terrifying. It can't help that he was your enemy at first can it...

I sort of like the idea that Yuu's interest in the less than human looking boys would be considered weird. The concept of a monsterfucker isn't foreign exactly but a monster-marry-and-raise-a-family-er is. There is a difference between a relationship and a sexual fantasy and Yuu sees no reason they can't have both, to the chagrin of damn near everyone around them. So it makes you sad to see him hide himself away from you and wonder why he hates his own beauty so much. He keeps his teeth from you, tries to hide his merform too and you just don't understand why. His bioluminescence takes your breath away and fills you with such soft stirrings of attraction you cry into your pillows and write 10 more pages about how desperately you want to drown yourself for just one chance with him! But he's running away from you and now Azul tells you he's going to be out of commission for a solid week with a sigh that you know is theatrical but still worries you. So you confront Jade about it and he seems almost sick, unable to control his transformation as he displays for you winding around the bubble that keeps you breathing outside of Octavinelle's dorm. The lights take your breath away long before he breeches the bubble to press up against you and moans somewhere deep into his throat letting his instincts guide him for just a few blissful seconds before he flops back with a stammer because oh no, not like this never like this please forgive him and run back to-

He's not expecting to be pulled back, you look as hungry as he feels as you guide him to your neck and whine something about how you need him when he's the one supposed to be saying that and scream in radiant joy when he bites. You are trying to wrap around him, to grind into him, babbling in frustration trying to scratch at his shoulders for a grip so you can wind your legs tighter around him-

He pushes the bubble away from the entrance and steers it haphazardly back, there's a place for this. Safe, secluded, and warm he made sure to pick one where a bit of sunlight could still reach the sandy floors and fuel you as he finally takes what you were always willing to give. Slowly and softly until he has you relaxed into his trap and then oh so gently for all the time after.

[xoxolaw]

HEELLOOOOO

hi hows your days lately? however… ive been invested in sombr’s undressed…

can i ask undressed ft geum seongje with time travel au (if thats how to order the au menu..) like seongje is the time traveler and he want to change her death in few years ahead (?) and seongje been depressed for years as he doesnt want any one but you..

+ 𝗧𝗛𝗘 𝗟𝗔𝗦𝗧 𝗪𝗜𝗡𝗧𝗘𝗥 𝗜 𝗟𝗢𝗦𝗧 𝗬𝗢𝗨

in which Seong-je, a time traveler, goes back to the past to save the girl he lost — and swears this time, she lives, even if he doesn’t.

+ 𝗚𝗘𝗨𝗠 𝗦𝗘𝗢𝗡𝗚-𝗝𝗘 𝗫 𝗥𝗘𝗔𝗗𝗘𝗥

angst

The day she died, the world stopped making sense.

It was raining—not the violent kind, but the soft, lonely sort. The one that felt like the sky itself was grieving.

Geum Seong-je had seen a lot of blood in his life. Spilled it with his own hands. Waded through crimson-soaked alleys and ruined men without blinking.

But her blood—the warmth of it spreading across his hands as she collapsed into him—was the one thing that never left his skin. Not even in dreams.

He could still hear her voice, like a fading echo underwater.

"I'm glad you're okay."

And she smiled.

Even as she bled out. Even as his throat tore from screaming her name. Even as he held her like a man begging the universe to undo itself.

But time didn't stop for pain. It moved forward, cruel and merciless, dragging him along with it like a corpse caught in the tide.

She was gone.

And Geum Seong-je stopped being human.

✮⋆˙

Their apartment had always been warm when she was alive.

The kitchen constantly smelled of citrus and sugar, the small living room cluttered with mismatched cushions and the quiet hum of whatever song she had on repeat that week. There was a framed polaroid on the windowsill where she had her eyes shut mid-laugh, her fingers stained with flour.

After her death, the light died.

He didn't touch her side of the bed. Couldn't. It stayed made for months. Her toothbrush remained in the cup. Her sweater hung over the back of the couch, where she last dropped it before leaving that morning.

Every room echoed with her absence.

He tried to cope the only way he knew: through silence. Through distance. Through clenched fists and eyes that refused to close because the dreams were worse than reality. He kept working. Kept killing. Let blood be the only thing that washed over his grief. Because if he stopped moving, he'd break.

Some days, he stood in the doorway of their bedroom, just to look at where she used to sit cross-legged and complain about his cigarette smoke.

The grief was a parasite. Gentle and sharp. It rewrote him into a man who existed in past tense.

Until the man with silver hair appeared.

He came without fanfare. Just stood in the middle of Seong-je's living room like he belonged there.

"You want her back," he said.

Not a question. A fact.

He placed a small pocket watch on the table. Its hands ticked backward.

"One chance. One jump. Change the thread. Or lose her again."

"What's the cost?" Seong-je asked.

"Everything," the man replied. "Except her."

He didn’t hesitate.

✮⋆˙

The sensation of being ripped from time wasn’t sharp. It was gentle. Like falling into water you didn’t realize was deep.

When he woke up, he was sprawled in the back alley of a neighborhood that no longer stank of rot. His head pounded. His hands were clean. And the sky was a shade of blue he hadn’t seen in years.

His chest ached with the sudden absence of grief—like his body didn't know how to function without the weight.

Everything was… new.

He was back.

One year before she died.

✮⋆˙

He avoided the bookstore street where he had first seen her.

He memorized the date. Knew exactly when she'd step between a thug and a teenage girl and change his life with trembling hands and a steady voice. But he didn’t go.

Couldn’t.

If he saw her too soon, he'd fall apart.

So he kept his distance. Watched her from far off rooftops. Traced the route she took to work. Learned the way she still hummed to herself when she thought no one was listening.

He told himself it was for her safety. That he couldn’t alter too much too fast. That it would be reckless.

But the truth was simpler.

He was terrified.

Because he hadn’t held her in so long, he didn’t know what it would do to him to see her eyes light up again—and know she had no idea who he was.

✮⋆˙

But fate has no patience for cowards.

He saw her again anyway.

He had ducked into a side street to avoid being recognized. Had meant to turn back. But there she was.

In a warm yellow sundress, hair tied messily back, squatting down to help a stray cat with a bandaged paw.

Everything stopped.

The air. The street. His heartbeat.

She looked up, sensing him.

Their eyes met.

And in that moment, all the years he'd carried collapsed inside him like a house of cards.

She stood slowly. Brushed her hands on her dress. Tilted her head, curious.

"Do I know you?"

He swallowed.

She was so close.

"No," he said.

But the crack in his voice betrayed him.

She blinked. Her gaze softened, brows drawing slightly together like she could feel his sorrow.

Her lips parted, a hesitant breath caught between words. He looked like someone haunted. His shoulders rigid, his knuckles pale as his hands clenched by his sides.

The kind of man who had loved and lost. And lost badly.

She didn't know why her chest ached for a stranger.

But it did.

"You look like you've seen a ghost," she murmured.

He gave a hollow smile. One that never touched his eyes.

"Maybe I have."

The breeze tugged at the loose strands of her hair. The cat meowed and pawed at her ankle, breaking the moment.

She crouched down again, giving the kitten a soft rub between its ears. "You should take care of yourself," she said, not looking at him this time.

He watched her, every cell of him aching.

"You always say that," he whispered under his breath.

She glanced up.

"What?"

"Nothing."

She straightened up and gave him a faint smile. There was something kind in it. Like she was used to noticing sadness in people, even if they didn’t voice it.

She stood there for a second longer than she needed to. Like something in her wanted to linger, but she wasn’t sure why. Her fingers brushed the edge of her dress, fidgeting—like they needed something to hold. Someone to reach for.

"I should go," she said gently, not quite meeting his gaze.

Her voice was soft. Like a blanket draped over an open wound. Kindness layered over instinctive caution. She didn’t know him. Not really. But something about the way he looked at her felt like an unfinished sentence she wasn’t ready to read.

She turned and walked down the street, her silhouette melting into sunlight and summer dust.

And Seong-je?

He didn’t move.

Not until she was out of sight.

Then he exhaled, slowly. Shakily. Like he had been holding his breath since the day she died.

✮⋆˙

He didn’t approach her again.

But he watched. From a distance. And soon, he noticed: she worked part-time at a community center a few blocks down.

Helping kids. Tutoring after school. Mediating between difficult teens and exhausted staff. Never once raising her voice. Just sitting down beside them like she had all the time in the world.

She was still the same.

Soft, but unyielding.

She was breaking up a shouting match one evening when a man shoved one of the boys hard enough to knock him down. She stepped forward without thinking, arms spread, her voice firm.

The man didn’t like that.

He raised his hand.

And Seong-je stepped in.

He grabbed the man’s wrist mid-air. Squeezed just enough to make him drop to his knees with a yelp.

"Try it," Seong-je said quietly. "Go ahead."

The others recognized him. The name. The weight behind it.

They backed off.

She looked stunned.

He didn’t wait for her questions.

He turned to leave.

"Wait!" she called. "Why do you keep showing up?"

He paused, the fading light outlining his profile like a memory she hadn’t made yet.

"Because you still don't know how to stay out of trouble," he said.

Then he walked away, again, heart in pieces.

But now, something was shifting.

Because she was starting to follow.

✮⋆˙

She started noticing him after that.

In the library, two tables over. On the bus, across the aisle. Outside the bakery she liked, leaning on a railing, pretending not to look.

And she was no fool.

He never approached. Never tried to speak.

But his eyes always found her. Like they were tuned only to the sound of her laugh, the shape of her silence.

And one day, as she sat alone in the community center's garden during a quiet afternoon, she said aloud to no one in particular:

"I think you're the saddest person I've ever met."

He stepped out from the shadow of the hallway.

"And yet, you keep finding me."

She didn’t flinch.

She looked at him.

"Then tell me why."

His breath hitched.

For the first time, he stepped into the sunlight with her.

And the past, just for a moment, stopped chasing him.

✮⋆˙

He sat down beside her.

Not close enough to touch, but close enough that he could finally feel the warmth of her again—like sunlight after years underground.

The silence between them stretched, taut and humming.

She waited.

Not impatiently. Just… openly. Like she had all the time in the world for broken people.

And maybe she did.

"I used to think grief was the worst kind of pain," he said at last. His voice was quieter than she expected. Rough around the edges, like gravel soaked in rain.

"But it’s not."

She looked at him, brow furrowing.

"It’s remembering the moments before it. The last time someone said your name. The way they laughed at something stupid. The way they looked at you like… you mattered."

He turned to her then.

"And knowing you’ll never get that version of them again."

Her throat tightened. Something inside her folded like paper in a storm.

"You talk like you’ve lost everything."

He didn’t answer.

He didn’t have to.

There was a pain in his gaze that didn’t belong to a boy his age. It belonged to someone who had already lived—and burned—and been buried.

"Why me?" she asked softly.

His eyes softened, just a little.

"You once told me the world was still good. Even when it wasn’t."

She blinked. "I did?"

"You don’t remember," he murmured. "Not yet."

"Yet?"

He froze.

A beat too long.

And she saw it—that flicker of panic. Like a boy holding too many fragile things in his hands and realizing one had slipped.

He stood suddenly. Like being near her hurt.

"I shouldn't be here," he said.

She rose too. “Then why are you?”

His jaw clenched. "Because staying away feels worse."

Something in her face cracked.

And before she could stop herself, she stepped forward.

Her hand reached for his wrist—hesitant, uncertain. Like muscle memory she didn’t know she had.

Their fingers didn’t quite touch.

But the air between them pulsed with the weight of almosts.

“You feel familiar,” she whispered.

He swallowed. Didn’t dare move.

“Do I know you from somewhere?”

He closed his eyes.

And for a breath, he let himself pretend.

“You used to love rainy days,” he said, just above a whisper. “You said the sky sounded lonelier than you, and it made you feel seen.”

Her breath caught.

“Tell me who you are,” she said.

He opened his eyes.

And this time, he didn’t lie.

“I’m the man who failed you,” he said. “And I’m here to try again.”

The wind whispered through the leaves above them. She stared at him, as if the answer to all her unfinished thoughts was stitched into the lines of his face.

“You’re not making any sense,” she whispered. “But I want to believe you.”

Seong-je looked down at her hand. Still hovering near his wrist.

“I don’t deserve that,” he said.

“Maybe not,” she replied. “But you’re here. That has to mean something.”

He laughed—quiet and hollow. “You always gave people more than they gave back.”

She tilted her head, searching his face. “What happens if I remember you?”

“You won’t,” he said. “Not really. The thread I’m walking—what I’m doing—was never meant to hold both of us.”

She took a step forward.

“What does that mean?”

He swallowed.

The truth sat like rust on his tongue.

“I traded everything,” he said. “Every version of myself that didn’t know you. I let the world unravel as long as it gave me this one chance.”

She blinked.

“Then what are you so afraid of?”

“That I’ll fail again.”

She looked at him for a long time. Then quietly:

“Don’t.”

✮⋆˙

Weeks Passed

He stayed close. Not too close. But close enough to change small things.

He warned the girl she would’ve saved from thugs. Got her home early that day. Made sure the event that brought her into that alley never happened.

He moved quietly in the background. Shifting pieces. Breaking loops.

Because that day—the one where she died—it was coming.

And he knew it.

He knew who would come for her. He remembered the blood. The cold tile. The gun in her hand she had never fired. The face of the man who shot first.

And this time, Seong-je would be there.

✮⋆˙

The Day She Was Supposed to Die

It rained.

Not violently.

Soft. Gentle. Like the world remembered, too.

She was at the community center, cleaning up late. The lights were half-off. She had just finished stacking the books when a figure stepped into the hallway behind her.

She turned.

A stranger.

Gun raised.

It happened fast.

Too fast.

But this time—

He was faster.

Seong-je tackled the man to the ground, the gun skidding across the linoleum. They fought in shadows and fluorescent flickers. One shot fired. Into the wall. Another, into the air. Screams from behind locked doors.

And then silence.

Seong-je stood, panting, covered in blood that wasn’t his.

She stood frozen in the doorway, one hand over her mouth.

He turned.

And in that moment—shaking, bloodied, alive—she remembered.

Her knees buckled.

And he caught her.

The Thread Snaps

The world stilled.

A low hum filled the air. The hallway blurred.

And in the silence, the man with silver hair appeared again. Leaning against the wall like he’d been watching all along.

“You did it,” he said.

Seong-je looked up. “She’s alive.”

“For now,” the man said. “You’ve changed the thread. That means the old one has to go.”

Seong-je held her tighter. “What do you mean?”

“You were never meant to return,” the man said. “This was a one-way door. You stopped fate once. That’s all it allows.”

Seong-je rose to his feet slowly.

“She remembers,” he said. “You said she wouldn’t.”

“She does because she chose to,” the man said. “Memory is just another kind of thread.”

Then his eyes softened.

“You can stay. But you’ll forget.”

Seong-je flinched. “Forget her?”

“No,” the man said. “Forget your grief. The version of her you lost. The pain. The blood. It will all fade. She’ll be the only thing that stays.”

Seong-je looked down at her.

She was crying now. Silent. Barely breathing. Holding onto him like she finally saw the full shape of what he had carried.

And in that moment, he made peace with forgetting.

He bent down and pressed his forehead to hers.

“If I don’t remember any of this,” he whispered, “tell me you’ll remind me how much I loved you.”

She smiled through her tears.

“I’ll remind you every day.”

✮⋆˙

One Year Later

Their apartment smelled like citrus and sugar.

A framed polaroid sat on the windowsill—her laughing, fingers stained with flour. Mismatched cushions scattered across the couch. Her sweater over the backrest.

He stirred sugar into her coffee, still half-asleep, watching her hum along to the radio as she braided her hair.

Seong-je didn’t remember the rain.

Or the blood.

Or the grief that once hollowed him out.

But sometimes—just sometimes—he’d look at her a moment too long, his chest aching with something he couldn’t name.

And she’d smile.

Like she knew.

Because she did.

And that was enough.

+ 𝗔𝗨𝗧𝗛𝗢𝗥'𝗦 𝗡𝗢𝗧𝗘 + 𝗠𝗔𝗦𝗧𝗘𝗥𝗟𝗜𝗦𝗧

I feel sad... Bye

+ 𝗧𝗔𝗚𝗟𝗜𝗦𝗧

@sunnyophelia @atztrsr @snoopsyka @cayrelyra @symphonies-of-poenies @ghost-reine @ginaaaa29 @gacktsa @inom17 @coffee-ii @dna-black-and-blue @intoanothermind @satoru2716 @kyungjunnies @changbinkisser @mishh2728 @0waves2earth @ashayein @janjoonty @ineed-myspace @itzcandy

[queereads-bracket]

Queer Historical Fiction Book Bracket: Round 1B

Book summaries and submitted endorsements below:

A Lady for a Duke by Alexis Hall

Endorsement from submitter #1: "A book by a queer author about a stealth trans woman functioning just after the napoleonic wars and marrying her former best friend. Also features some sapphic women trying to live their lives in this patriarchal society."

Endorsement from submitter #2: "I'm a big fan of romance novels and I like queer fiction, and this married the two together in every way I could've hoped. This book is genuinely everything I was hoping it would be, the main couple are lovely and genuine and I was sincerely rooting for them, and the supporting characters are the sort that delight you every time they show up. When I say I want queer versions of romance novel staples, this is absolutely the gold standard I'll be holding them to from now on. Includes disability rep"

When Viola Carroll was presumed dead at Waterloo she took the opportunity to live, at last, as herself. But freedom does not come without a price, and Viola paid for hers with the loss of her wealth, her title, and her closest companion, Justin de Vere, the Duke of Gracewood.

Only when their families reconnect, years after the war, does Viola learn how deep that loss truly was. Shattered without her, Gracewood has retreated so far into grief that Viola barely recognises her old friend in the lonely, brooding man he has become.

As Viola strives to bring Gracewood back to himself, fresh desires give new names to old feelings. Feelings that would have been impossible once and may be impossible still, but which Viola cannot deny. Even if they cost her everything, all over again.

Setting: Regency England

Historical fiction, romance, Regency, adult

All the Painted Stars by Emma Denny (14th Century Oxfordshire #2)

Endorsement from submitter: "What if A Knight's Tale was about lesbians? That's it, that's the book. Also the author's fixation on medieval brewing. Swords, jousting, and the lesbian yearning of being secretly in love with your best friend and not being able to do anything about it. Lily is good at two things: hitting guys with a stick, and ruining marriages."

Oxfordshire 1362

When Lily Barden discovers her best friend Johanna’s hand in marriage is being awarded as the main prize at a tournament, she is determined to stop it. Disguised as a knight, she infiltrates the contest, preparing to fight for Jo’s hand. But her conduct ruffles feathers, and when a dangerous incident escalates out of Lily’s control, Jo must help her escape.

Finding safety with a local brewster, Lily and Jo soon settle into their new freedom, and amongst blackberry bushes and lakeside walks an unexpected relationship blossoms. But when Jo’s past catches up with her and Lily’s reckless behaviour threatens their newfound happiness, both women realise that choices must always come at a cost. The question they need to ask is if the cost is worth the price of love…

Setting: Medieval Oxfordshire, 1362

Historical fiction, romance, medieval, 1360s, series, adult

[m-jelly]

Tame Me - Chapter 1

Levi x fem reader

Wolf Levi, fox reader, hybrids, romance, mates, soulmates, future fic, space travel, angst, mystery, possessive Levi, sexual tension.

Fic info: Levi is a wolf man, used like others to fight in wars, but now they're over. The government doesn't know what to do with them and doesn't want to lose their prized fighters. Levi attacks everyone, so he's chained up in a cell. When you accidentally end up there, he doesn't attack but shows a strong attraction. You're tasked with healing Levi's body and soul and helping him come back to society but also learning the planet you're from isn't so beautiful. The two of you uncover the truth and lies behind your illness, the wars and the experiments.

Ao3

Part 2

The ship's hum always made you sleep peacefully, and the lighting was dark neons, adding to the comforting feel within your quarters. Travelling space had always been your dream, so having a father who was the General of a special team carrying out the cleanup for the galactic union allowed you to travel. He let you join him on some missions as soon as you were an adult. You’d been with him for years, and this mission was important, collecting the most dangerous soldiers ever created.

For a long time, Earthlings and other beings in the Milky Way struggled to keep peace and allow people to be safe. No matter what weapons or defence systems were formed, it was all useless. The government on Earth decided to take the torch and sacrifice many of their people for testing. As a result, Fang was created, an elite team of bloodthirsty and unstoppable soldiers. The best of their kind was a wolf, Captain Levi Ackerman.

As soon as Fang was released, order was slowly brought to the Milky Way, but at the cost of those in Fang. Their sanity suffered, and scars covered their bodies. They were so damaged that when everything came to an end, when the members of Fang were collected, they were like animals. Your father had collected almost all of them, and all had slowly turned back to functioning people, but Levi was one of the last in his small special ops team.

You jolted awake from your slumber when you heard a deep growl and shouting echo through the ship. The AI recognised you were awake and began your morning routine, giving you updates, opening the shutter to reveal space and getting your clothes out. You washed up in your bathroom, cleaned your teeth and dressed for the day. You dried off your ears and tail, causing them to fluff up; it was often the downside of being a fox.

You checked your orange ears and tail to ensure they were okay before leaving your room next to your father’s. The ship was rather large, meaning it had to have a few lifts, one special one for your father, which you had access to. There were multiple floors to it, each with its own team. The top deck, which was below you and your father’s rooms, was the flight deck. It had the cockpit where a skilled pilot was and behind filling many rooms were intel providers and a large galaxy map, a separate room in the back was for meetings. The second deck had the med-bay, commanding officers and the mess hall. The third deck was weapons, main crew, quarters and research centre. The fourth deck hand training rooms, on planet vehicles and the cells to hold prisoners. Lower were the engines, main power core and a few other tech things.

You went down to the med-bay first to see your father chatting to the doctor, who always held your father in her heart, but your father was besotted by your mother. The metal floors clanged under your boots as you walked to the door; they slid open, causing the scent of antiseptic to wash over you. You gently smiled when you saw your bulky father with a very fluffy tail, It appeared he hadn’t slept much and didn’t look after his tail and ears.

“Father?”

The General perked up at hearing your voice. He pulled away from the doctor, making her scowl at you. “Hello, sweetpea, it’s not like you to be awake at this time.”

“I was awoken by growls and shouts.”

He frowned. “You did? You must have good hearing.”

You looked up at the wall to see scans of the most beautiful and divine body you’d ever seen. Your whole body flushes as you feel a strong attraction. “What is this?”

The doctor moved closer. “Scans of Levi Ackerman. We managed to get some, but people got hurt in the process.”

You studied them closely. “Woah.” There were so many signs of experiments and him being knitted back together after being taken apart, it broke your heart.

“Fascinating, isn’t it?”

You lightly touched a scan. “It’s so sad.”

“Sad!? He’s a beast!”

You looked over at her. “He’s a wolf who believed in our people and was abused and used.”

Your father placed his hand on your shoulder. “You have a good heart.”

The doctor snarled. “If she’s so good, she should see that beast herself.”

You held your head high. “Maybe I should.”

Your father pulled you along. “Come on.”

As soon as you were away from the doctor, you spoke. “I don’t like her.”

“I don’t either. I’ll request a transfer. I don’t want people like her on my ship.” He released a long sigh. “I need to go visit the Captain.”

You perked up a little. “May I go with you?”

“He’s incredibly dangerous.”

You tilted your head a little, causing your ear to flop a little. “I’ll keep my distance, I promise. I just want to see. I’ve studied the others and created a guide to help them. I can do it for him.”

He folded his arms and hummed. “I’m not sure. The Captain is the most feral of them all.” He leaned against the wall of the lift. “I trust you, and I know you’re strong, but I don’t want you to get hurt.” He lowered his head. “I know you don’t like it when your mother or I bring it up, but you were a very sick baby and kid. You’ve only recently gotten well in the past few years.”

You leaned against your dad. “I can’t imagine what it must have been like to watch your kid grow up sick and you feel so powerless.” You watched the lift go to the floor where Levi was on. “I promise I’ll leave if things get dangerous, but you know I’m the best person to see him.”

“You’re right.” He walked out of the lift and turned to you. “Come on. Make sure you stay close to me.”

“I will.”

As the two of you walked towards the cells, darkness began to wrap around you, the air was thick, and the heat increased. A deep growl emitted from the cell at the end. Two guards sprinted out of the cell, blood on both of them. Your father stopped both and began talking to them, leaving you alone. The three of them pulled away from you and started talking about what happened and giving updates.

You did what you promised your father at first, but then there was something pulling you towards the cell. This pull wasn’t curiosity but deep within you, calling you to the person inside; it was like you were connected on a deep level, an unbreakable bond. Your instinct took over, and you walked inside the cell right as the door closed behind you. As soon as the door closed, it dawned on you what you’d done.

You jumped and faced the closed door. “Oh no…” You gasped when you heard a deep growling behind you and chains clinking. “Aah…” A hot body pressed against your back, strong arms wrapped around your body and gripped you tightly. You shivered as his scent washed over you. Instead of being scared, you moaned. “Mm.”

Levi nuzzled the crook of your neck and inhaled deeply. He stuck his tongue out and slowly dragged his tongue along your scent spot. “Mate.”

The light came on in the cell, and the door slid open as your father stood there with four guards. He held his arm up. “Don’t go in until I say.” He softly called your name as worry etched his face. “Are you okay? Are you hurt?”

You nodded and hummed in reply. “I’m fine, he hasn’t hurt me.”

Your father moved closer. “Captain Levi Ackerman, you’re holding my daughter. Please release her.”

Levi hugged you tighter and dragged you deeper into his cell as he growled. “Mine.”

“She’s my daughter! Let her go!”

The Lieutenant pulled your father back. “General, I think it’s best if we leave her with him.”

Your father snarled at the handsome Lieutenant. “How dare you! She’s my daughter!”

“He’s not hurt her, he’s claiming and protecting her. Other women have been around him, and he’s never reacted like this before.” He placed his hand on the General’s chest. “Maybe she can get him to do as she says. Let’s step back and leave it to her.”

He gulped hard as he considered his Lieutenant’s words. He nodded and looked over at you before calling your name. “Do you feel safe with him? Are you okay to stay with him?”

You placed your hand on Levi’s arm. “Yes. I’ll be okay.”

“I trust you.” He released a long sigh, and for a small moment, you saw his exhaustion. “If you need help, you scream as loud as you can for me, okay?”

“I promise.”

He gulped hard. “Captain Levi Ackerman? Listen to me. That woman you are holding is my daughter, and she’s sick. You need to be careful with her.” His voice cracked. “Please.”

Levi squeezed you and grunted. “Safe.”

“Thank you.” He bowed his head and left you alone with Levi.

You shifted in Levi’s arms, but he yanked you closer and growled. “A-Ah, sorry. I uh…I’m rather sick and weak…so…I need to rest.” You squeaked when Levi lifted you, moved you and then sat you on his bed. “Um.” You flinched a bit when he dropped to his knees with a loud thud. He sniffed around you a bit before flopping onto your lap. “Oh.” You reached over and fussed his head and ears. “Good boy.”

Levi’s tail wagged fast. “Mm.”

You noticed his hair was a little long, his body was covered in scars, bruises and cuts. The only thing Levi was wearing was ripped-up trousers. “I bet you’d like a nice hot shower and some decent clothes, huh?”

He gripped your thighs, lifted his head and gazed at you with wide pupils. “Yes.”

You held his chin and looked at his pretty blueish-grey eyes. “I’ll see if I can arrange something.”

He leaned up and went for your neck. He felt you instantly tense up as he nuzzled and sniffed your scent. “Mate.”

You placed your hands on his chest and pushed a little when he licked and kissed your skin. “W- Wait.”

He paused. “Levi.”

You hummed. “Y-yes, Levi. Please wait.”

He pulled back and gazed at you with a softness in his eyes. “Yes.”

You placed your hand on your chest and sighed. “Thank you.” You coughed a little. “Sorry.”

He leaned closer and placed his ear against your chest. “Hm.” He put his hands on your back and held you against his ear. “Sick.”

“I am. I have medicine, though. I need it, so I’ll leave here to get it at some point.”

His ears went down as he looked upset. “Leave me?”

“I’ll come back to you.”

His tail wagged. “Promise.”

You fussed his ear. “Promise.”

You released a long sigh as you sat on the medical bed, waiting for your injection. You smiled softly when the nurse approached you with your medicine. He cleaned a spot on your thigh and injected the medicine, making you wince slightly. “Mm, thanks.”

“Sorry if it hurt.”

You released a long sigh. “I’m used to it.”

He smiled and placed a patch on the wound. “You’re an incredible person.”

“Thanks. I appreciate you helping me with the injections, sometimes I just can’t bring myself to do it.”

He offered you a drink. “Anytime.”

You sipped the sweet drink and hummed when you heard the dull vibrations of slightly raised voices go through the ship. “What’s going on?”

“I think that Captain is having a medical check.”

You gripped your cup as the noises got louder. Levi was not happy about his treatment and didn’t want to be touched. You placed your cup down and slipped out the small room before looking over to the main medbay. Inside the room, through the glass, you saw Levi had a muzzle on, collar and other chains to control him, but he was ripping out of them. The team managed to get Levi on the bed and strap him down, but he started yanking at his restraints, causing everyone to rush out of the medbay just as he broke out. The medbay was now on full lockdown.

You hurried over to your father with the doctor you didn’t like. “Father?”

He looked down at you and smiled. “Hello, sweetpea. Did you have your injection?”

“I did.”

“Are you feeling okay?”

“Yeah.” You gazed inside the medbay at Levi. “May I go in to him?”

Your father released a long sigh. “I don’t want to give you over to him again, but you seem to be the only one who can get close to him.”

You smiled at your father. “I’ll help him. I have some medical training, so I’ll carry out the tests to see if he’s okay. I’ll heal his wounds too.”

He wrapped his arms around you, allowing him to hold you close. “Be safe.”

“I will.” You pulled away from him and stood by the doors. As soon as the lockdown went, you entered the room and waited for the doors to lock. Your heart raced in your chest when you heard Levi growl and huff. “Levi?”

He growled and glared at you. In a blink of an eye, he was in front of you, but his rage was quickly replaced with deep adoration and care. His tail wagged as he admired you. He softly said your name. “My mate.”

“I’m here to help.” You reached over towards his muzzle. “I came back like promised.”

He hummed and leaned his head closer. “Yes.”

You released the mechanisms on the muzzle and pulled it off. “There, that’s better.”

He nuzzled your neck. “Yes.”

You petted his head. “Let me take everything else off, okay?”

“Okay.”

You took his hand and sat him on the medical bed before taking all the broken restraints. “You’ve got a lot of wounds on you.”

“Hmm.” He reached over and lightly touched you all over while his eyes never left you.

“I need to patch your wounds.”

He huffed. “No.”

You cupped his face and lifted his head. “Don’t you want me to dote on you?”

His eyes lit up. “Okay.” He watched you move around him and slowly patch up his wounds. Any medicine you gave him, he happily accepted because it was you. The scent rolling off you was divine to him, but there was something mixed in that he recognised from all the battles he’d been in. He grabbed your wrist and sniffed. “Blood.”

You felt your cheeks heat up. “Oh, I had an injection right before coming to see you. So, the blood you’re smelling is on my thigh where the injection spot is.”

He looked down at your thighs. “You…okay?”

You hummed as you thought it over. “I am today.” You fussed his ears. “I need to carry out some tests.” You giggled when he growled. “I know, I don’t like the tests I have for my sickness, but I’ll do the tests, and it’s just to see your healthy. You need to be healthy, Levi, to be around me.” You cupped the side of his face, his eyes sparkling as you spoke. “I’m a sick fox, so I need a strong person around me.”

“I’m strong.”

“You are?”

He nodded. “Yes.” He shifted on the bed and lay back on the bed. “Test me.”

You picked up an injector and approached him. You tried not to look at his heaving chest with plump pecs and abs covered in scars, but it was hard not to. You gulped hard and smiled softly at him. “I need to take some blood. Where do you want me to do that?”

He tapped his arm. “Here.”

You pressed the injector gun against him and pressed. You saw he didn’t flinch one bit and just accepted it. “You must have been through many experiments when you were younger. I can’t imagine this is nice for you.”

“It’s fine.”

You pulled the injector back when it was full. “Fine? How is this fine?”

He reached over to you. “Fine with you.” He took your hand and brought it to cup his face. “You’re good.”

You pulled from Levi and walked away. “What if I’m not? I could be horrible for all you know.” You pulled out the blood container and put it in the analysing slot. “I mean, I am helping the people you don’t like on this ship.” You turned around and saw Levi’s chest right in front of you. You slowly looked up at Levi. “Um.”

He placed his hand on the wall behind you and leaned closer, his lips almost touching yours. “You’re my mate.” He tilted his head and sniffed your neck. “You’re good.”

“Levi.”

He took your hand and placed it on his chest. He growled and moaned a little. “Touch more.” He started panting when he moved your hands down a little. “Mate.”

“But I.”

He dragged his lips up to your ear. “I trust you.”

You pushed him back a bit. “That’s…you…” You sighed and fussed his ear. “Good boy.”

Levi growled and picked you up, making you squeal and panic those watching you both. He sat you on the desk and nuzzled you. “Again.”

You shivered as your whole body tingled. “G-Good boy.”

He leaned up and chomped on your ear. He growled when you moaned in response. “More.”

“Le-Levi, le-let go.”

He released your ear. “Okay.”

You whined a bit as you gazed at him. “I need to carry on the tests.” You mewled as he kept touching you and squeezing all the right places. “Levi.”

He turned to face the door as guards came in with the doctor. He growled at them as he shielded you. “Mine.”

The room became filled with growls, shouting of demands and threats of violence. You knew you had to step in otherwise, someone would get hurt. You didn’t want anyone to get hurt, especially Levi, because he was misunderstood. You slipped off the desk and stood in front of Levi with your back to him. As soon as you stood in the way, the guards put their guns down.

You lowered your hands. “Please, he means no harm. He’s just a very hurt man. He thinks I’m his mate. Please, please don’t hurt him.”

A guard raised his gun a little, he was new and terrified of Levi. As soon as he raised his gun, it was pointed at you, not Levi. Levi growled with rage at seeing you being threatened. He slipped from behind you and charged at the guard. The guard was on the floor before anyone could react, with Levi pinning him down, ready to rip his throat out.

“Levi!” He stopped as soon as he heard your voice. Your heart raced as he looked over at you. “Don’t hurt him, he was just doing his job. Please.” You coughed a bit as your heart raced more. “A-Ah.” Dizziness hits you. “Father.” Before you knew it, you were on the floor with blood trickling down your nose. “Dad.” Tears ran down your face as you watched Levi and your father rush over. “Dad.”

Your father skidded to his knees and picked you up in his arms. He called your name as Levi sniffed you over. “Stop sniffing her!”

Levi hummed in thought before racing over to the medicine storage and rummaging through it. He shot over to you and pulled a cap off the end of an injector. “Arm.” He looked up at your father as he stared. “Arm!”

Your father flinched. “Y-Yes.” He pushed your sleeve up and watched Levi inject you. “What are you doing?”

“Helping.” He pressed the button. “Smells match.” He cupped the side of your face as you panted. “You’ll be okay.”

You reached over with a weak hand and held his. “Be good.”

Your father released a long sigh when you passed out. “Captain, I know you’re incredibly hostile to my people, but you saved my daughter because you can sense how to help her through a mating bond.” He looked up at Levi. “I can’t believe I’m saying this, but could you stay with her in her room until she’s better? If you do this for me, I’ll let her be assigned to you when we reach the space station and planet where you will be rehabilitated. Do we have a deal? You help her, and I’ll let you keep her around.”

Levi’s eyes lit up in pure delight; keeping you was all he ever wanted. “Deal.”

You rolled over in bed as your body began waking up. Something was next to you and producing such an alluring heat that all you wanted to do was get closer to it. You slipped your arms around whatever it was and felt it move. You opened your eyes and inhaled deeply, allowing you to smell something delicious, like freshly baked food with a hint of lemon.

Heat filled your cheeks when you saw a pec with scars on in front of you. You sat up quickly and gazed down at Levi, who was sleeping peacefully. “How…”

Levi opened his eyes and stretched, causing his ears to shudder, his fangs in view. He rolled onto you, nuzzled your belly and sniffed. He smelt up your body to your chest. “Mm, healthy.”

“I am? I guess I have you to thank for that, huh?”

“Say it.”

You fussed his head. “Good boy.”

He growled and kept nuzzling. “Yes.”

You looked around your room. “We’re in my room.” You looked back down at Levi. “Have you been assigned to me?”

“Yes.”

You fiddled with your shirt. “I guess we’re stuck together, hmm?”

“Yes.” He slid closer and nipped your neck. “My mate.”

You moaned a little. “Levi.” You slowly lay back on the bed as he licked and bit your neck. “Ah.”

“Pretty, soft and cute.” He kissed down your neck to your chest. “Mate.” He nuzzled his face between your breasts before huffing a little as his tail wagged. “Mine.”

You gulped hard. “Am I really your mate?”

“Yes.”

You welled up a little. “That sounds lovely. I feel something, like a tingle and a connection to you, but I think this sickness I have is messing with the connection a little.”

“I’ll fix it.” He kissed right where your heart was. “Make you healthy.”

“I wish I knew what was wrong with me.”

Levi leaned up and wiped your tears away. He softly said your name. “You…”

You shifted under his and got off the bed. “I’m okay now. I’m going to go shower.” You walked to your bathroom and turned to talk, but Levi was right there. “Ah, you, uh can’t come with me.”

His ears went flat as he gave you his sad, puppy look. “Why?”

“I’m going for a shower. I’ll be naked.” You backed up, but he followed. “Just wait for me on my bed. You can sniff my clothes if you want.”

He whined a bit. “I want you.”

You reached over and fussed his ears. “I won’t be long.”

He reached over and grabbed your shirt. “Stay.”

You pointed to the bathroom. “I’ll just be in there.” You walked into the bathroom. “I’ll be back, I promise.”

He whined as soon as you closed the door. “Okay…”

You released a sigh and started stripping. You slipped into the hot shower and enjoyed how it felt on your skin. The heat from the shower on you caused your scent to fill your bedroom. Levi was in pure heaven being able to spell you so strongly and in such an alluring way. All he wanted to do was be with you, hold you, bite you and love every inch of you. You were also thinking about Levi in the shower, how big he was and how one minute he was a strong beast, but the next, he was so gentle with you. You wanted to get healthier so you could feel the mate bond more.

You dried off and pulled on new clothes from the dispenser before opening the door to see Levi sitting on the floor. “Levi?”

He looked up at you, his tail instantly wagging. “You’re back.”

“I am.”

He shot up to his feet and hugged you. “Mm.” He nuzzled the crook of your neck. “You smell different.”

You shivered at his touch. “I used body wash.”

He growled a bit. “Not nature, but still nice.” He huffed. “You’re nice.”

“Thank you. I need to dry off.”

He whined when you pulled from his touch and walked over to your dresser. “Don’t leave.”

You sat and got your hairdryer ready. “I’m not leaving. I just need to dry my hair, tail and ears.”

Levi watched you for a while before approaching you. “Give.”

You turned the dryer off. “Sorry, what did you say? It was loud.”

He reached over. “Give.”

You stared a moment before realising what he meant. “Oh!” You handed over the hairdryer. “Here you go.”

He turned it on and began drying your hair, ears and tail for you. He loved touching you and doting on you, he could also see you were enjoying the attention as well. He turned off the dryer and put it on your table. “Comb.”

You handed over your brush. “Be gentle, I do get knots in my hair and tail.”

He nodded at your instructions and began brushing away. “Soft.”

“Thank you.” You glanced down at your comms and sighed, it was time for medicine. “Um, I need my meds.” You moved to your little office area and grabbed an injector from your special container, which was about the size of a small fridge. “This should last me a while. Sometimes I get the nurse to do it for me, but I’m a bit tired, so I will do it myself.” You pushed your trouser leg down and injected your thigh. As soon as you did, Levi let out a deep growl. You looked up at him. “It’s okay, it’s only a bit of blood.”

He huffed. “Don’t like it.”

“I don’t either.” You disposed of the injector and placed a patch on the wound. “All done.” You walked over to your bed and lay on it. “I need to rest.”

Levi pounced onto the bed and wrapped his arms around you. “Mm. Sleep.”

You felt your cheeks heat up from him holding you so closely. “Y-Yes.” Your heart raced a little. You had no idea how you were going to cope with him being around you so much. He was a dream, but he set your body on fire with passion and feelings. You liked being with him.

[writing-for-life]

The Fulcrum of Change

The “Season of Mists”-Prologue as the Thematic Turning Point

So I guess our reread of Sandman #21 is, at least for me, one for literary analysis because it does SO much heavy lifting narratively. This issue is essentially the fulcrum between “Dream as an unchanging cosmic force” and “Dream as a character capable of growth”.

First off, the positioning of this issue is perfect in narrative terms. We’re 21 issues into the series—far enough that we understand Dream’s fundamental nature, but not so far that we’re completely locked into having an unchangeable (see what I did there?) opinion of him:

Everything before #21 establishes Dream’s seemingly immutable nature: He’s obsessed with duty, inflexible and bound by rules as old as the universe. Then this issue comes along and reveals that some of those “immutable” traits are actually choices. And choices can be changed. It’s brilliant structural storytelling, because of course you need to know Dream’s rigid patterns before you can perceive the cracks in them…

Death is a Catalyst…

[and the irony of calling Death a catalyst is not lost on me, and maybe I did it on purpose 😗]

Death’s role in this issue isn’t just “the older sister who puts your head straight”; she’s functioning as a literary catalyst in the truest sense. Her casual “Maybe it’s about time you corrected the fallout of your shitty behaviour” isn’t just advice (and I’m just putting this in at this point again: Death is always, always her function. Listening to her advice means getting closer to her—in the literal and metaphorical sense). It’s the narrative key that unlocks Dream’s entire character arc for the rest of the series. It’s the moment Dream begins his journey from archetype to tragic protagonist, although of course we already got glimpses at that before.

His decision to venture back to Hell isn’t just plot progression. He doesn’t have to go to Hell. He chooses to because Death helped him understand that responsibility is an active force, not just a passive one that has to be endured. He now begins to right his wrongs (if that’s even possible) and has to confront the consequences of past actions, no matter the cost.

Past and Future Mirrored in the Presence: Exposition That Doesn’t Feel Like Exposition, and the Connection to Later Arcs

Right, exposition is one of my personal bugbears in my own writing. Because it is often necessary, but it can quickly turn into, “As you know, Bob,” if you’re not careful. And while we get a fair amount of exposition in this issue, it’s really well done. We get massive amounts of backstory about the Endless, their relationships, their history, but it never feels like information dumping because it’s all filtered through character dynamics and emotional truth.

When we learn about Dream’s past treatment of lovers or the family dynamics, it’s not just world-building. Each piece of information serves both plot and character development simultaneously.

The theme of “facing consequences for past actions” introduced in #21 will dominate Season of Mists, A Game of You, and especially Brief Lives and The Kindly Ones. The notion that Dream’s rigid adherence to duty is actually a coping mechanism dressed up as choice is the essence of his entire character arc.

Plus, the family dynamics revealed in the prologue also mirror Dream’s relationships with other characters: His pattern of often impossibly high expectations, emotional withdrawal when disappointed, and his struggles to forgive are crucial for understanding his relationships with Nada, Orpheus, and ultimately also getting to the root of his relationship with himself (ouch!).

Delirium’s Narrative Function

If you did a bad thing once, does that mean you’re beyond redemption? And conversely, does the good cancel out the bad?

Delirium’s presence (and, to a degree, Destruction’s absence) at the family dinner adds such a deep layer of complexity because she represents change. Both Dream and Delirium respond in their own way to the cosmic laws that be: Dream copes by maintaining rigid order. And never breaking through rigid order means stagnation. Delirium copes by giving in to chaos, and chaos always means change because it’s inherently unstable and in flux. She’s proof that the Endless aren’t as fixed in their natures as Dream believes.

Her scattered observations throughout the dinner often cut straight to emotional truths. She’s not cute and a bit “frazzled”, she’s not comic relief, and unlike some, I personally also refuse to call her “tragic”. She’s a narrative foil to Dream because, unlike him, she allowed herself to be vulnerable and change. And there’s a lot of foreshadowing in that (of course, hindsight is always 20/20 vision).

And on the topic of foreshadowing, we obviously plant a lot of seeds in this issue that won’t fully bloom until later: Dream finally recognising that he hurt Nada, well, “just because he could”, tells us something about his deep-seated emotional volatility (and dreams are always somewhat volatile, no?) that is also part of what ultimately, well, not just destroys but also changes him.

Even the family dinner itself is a recurring motif. Not just because it’s something the siblings occasionally do, but also because we see it several times, and always at crucial turning points, in Brief Lives:

There is an instigating mini dinner with Delirium (no, don’t go with her pretending (!) to want to find Destruction while you’re really only looking for Thessaly, you idiot!):

There are the flashbacks to the previous family dinner (the one when Destruction abdicated, and there is obviously a lot of reflection surrounding it before and after, especially by Dream and Despair):

And then we have another mini family dinner when Dream and Delirium find Destruction. Let’s not go there or I’ll cry 😭:

And finally, there is The Wake 🥺:

The Crucial Tonal Shift

The most profound thing to me about Season of Mists was always the tonal shift though. Before #21, Sandman was a bit of a mixed bag of horror and fantasy. With SoM, it well and truly begins to turn into a Greek tragedy. But you need to be invested in someone and begin to believe in their capacity for growth to fully walk into catharsis that hurts like a bitch (as it should! Just sayin’) with open eyes. And honestly, when I read The Sandman for the first time decades ago, I was ill-prepared for it, and World’s End, not The Kindly Ones, hit me like a ton of bricks.

The introduction of emotional vulnerability makes Dream relatable in ways that just introducing us to some all-powerful being couldn’t. It’s from SoM onwards that we really and deeply start caring about his relationships, his growth, his potential for change. And yes, that makes his eventual fate devastating rather than just “dramatically appropriate”. Yet, it couldn’t be any other way, or you’d lose all of that.

Dream remains Dream throughout (as both Morpheus and Daniel), but he becomes an increasingly human version of that role (also as both Morpheus and Daniel). And that makes us relate.

Every structural plot element in #21 and beyond serves emotional truth:

The decision to go to Hell (go to Hell, Murph! 🤣) isn’t just plot advancement. It’s about free will, agency and responsibility.

The Sandman #21 is basically the narrative equivalent of a perfectly placed domino that sets up every major character development for the next issues…

[swbumblebee]

They were having a lovely cosy night. Some nonsense holodrama was on, the heater was blasting and Jedi Master and Time Traveller Plo Koon was idly scrolling through a pad contemplating a second glass of wine. From his own comfortable spot on the sofa next to him, his partner in time travel and Master of the Order Mace Windu sighed and shifted his feet of the caff table next to Plo’s own, not a moment before an alarm on his chrono went off.

Plo grunted questioningly at him, feeling uncharacteristically lazy and sleepy. The other man stretched as he stood up.

“Meeting with Cin about The Tournament” he mumbled back, gathering himself.

“Oh!”

Plo loved The Tournament. He’d missed it so much during the war, that first time round. The annual Coruscant Temple Sabre Tournament was something so special. Seeing aged Masters grumbling good naturedly trying to catch their breath, energetic young Knights teasing each other and Padawans gleefully egging each other on brought a sense of camaraderie and family that was lost forever once the war began.

“I’ll come with you” he decided, ignoring Mace’s surprised expression as he sat up with renewed vigour.

---

Plo tuned out as Mace and Cin Drallig, Battle Master extraordinaire, gestured at charts and catering costs on one of the benches in the corner of the main dojo. Neither seemed to mind his presence, Cin seemed unsurprised when they came as a pair.

While he left the boring logistics to the two senior Jedi he scrolled through the contenders list, comforted by the familiar names and intrigued by some interesting matches. It would be a lively affair.

He frowned, noticing something as he got to the Knights section.

Kab…

Kedib…

Kirin…

Krag…

He frowned further, checking the Senior Padawan section just in case.

Nope, not what he was looking for.

“Has Knight Kenobi not signed up for the tournament?” he asked loudly, interrupting the other two and not caring one bit. He got a pulse of mild irritation from Mace but interestingly, Cin simply let out a breath.

It wasn’t compulsory for every Jedi to take part in the tournament but there was certainly an obligation, particularly for Knights, to act as an example for their peers. To learn from each other and to inspire the next generation. It was just the Done Thing.

The Battle Master for the temple looked uncharacteristically perturbed.  

“Kenobi…” he sat back and folded his thick arms, pausing, and Plo saw Mace’s face sharpen in stern worry.

“He’s been here… a lot, in the past few months. At funny times.” Cin said, clearly picking his words carefully. “I’ve been helping him along, but most of the time I’m not here. I only see his name on the sign in sheet at all hours of the night.” He explained slowly.

Plo and Mace exchanged glances. That wasn’t good.

“Hmm. He didn’t sign up last year I assume, for obvious reasons” Mace asked with raised eyebrows.

Cin nodded.

“He’s changed his form since then, I’ve tried to ask him about it a couple of times but you know how he is.” He had a familiar look of exasperation on his face. Plo knew it well. When he didn’t want to, there wasn’t a force in the Galaxy that could make Obi-Wan Kenobi talk. Plo remembered it only got worse with age, to the infuriation of Sith across the galaxy that first time around.

Mace sighed and leaned back.

---

The Master of the Jedi Order cursed to himself under his breath and barely resisted the urge to grumble at nothing. He knew Obi-Wan somehow managed to function on dangerously little sleep (at all ages, apparently) but he himself had never managed to master the skill and his mood was as dark as the Courscant sky outside, at 3rd hour. Plo had offered to go, but Mace had a worrying suspicion it would end in a cuddle and a nap rather than what was necessary.

He was trying not to dwell on how suspicious he looked, loitering outside the main Dojo at this time of night, when his quarry came quietly and around the corner apparently deep in thought.

23-year-old Jedi Knight Obi-Wan Kenobi came to an abrupt and (rather comical) startled stop.

“Master!”

“Good evening, or should I say, good morning, Obi-Wan” Mace made no move to step away from the door to the dojo, but neither towards the young man in front of him.

“I…Hello there, Master. What…” the young man faltered, clearly still trying to find his footing. “What…are you doing here?” he asked cautiously.

Mace noted he definitely wasn’t at his best. Obviously not as well put together as he was in the daylight hours, there was none of the usual perceptive glint behind his eyes, his hair had obviously been pushed hurriedly into place and his robe was nowhere to be seen.

Mace shrugged.

“Shall we?” he gestured to the door behind him, entering the dojo.

Obi-Wan looked at the door dubiously before following.

“So.”

They stood in the vast hall, facing each other. Mace was very conscious they had both taken up sparring positions. So be it.

“So” he repeated calmly. “Do you want to tell me why you are practicing at this force-forsaken hour or shall I beat it out of you?” he asked politely with a smile, shifting his stance a little.

The young mans eyes narrowed.

“I don’t know what you mean Master, the Dojos are open all hours, surely encouraging practice at all hours” came the similarly polite answer.

Mace rolled his eyes.

“Fine.” He ignited his purple blade and assumed the opening stance of his favoured form, Vaapad.

“Come on then” he instructed the Knight. Obi-Wan’s eyes widened a little in surprise upon realising his mentor was serious, but then were filled with resolve as he too changed his stance.

And then immediately Mace Windu had the breath knocked out of his chest when, instead of the classic Ataru that he’d come to associate with the young Obi-Wan (indeed, the form he had become known for after using it to defeat Darth Maul) he was instead faced with the dramatic stance of Soresu.

He cursed himself, Cin had mentioned it but seeing it was something he had not been prepared for.

Lightsabre parallel to the floor and left arm extended with fingers pointing towards him, for a split second it wasn’t vulnerable, unsure Knight Kenobi Mace was seeing, it was the fearsome Master Kenobi. The Master of Soresu, and his comrade in arms. He’d seen that stance in the very worst of situations and every time it meant hope and determination.

“...Master?”

He was snapped back to the present by the slightly awkward prompt from the young man in front of him.

He grunted, trying to find his mental footing again.

“Not all of us are at our best at third hour young Obi-Wan” he grumbled, gratified when he got the ghost of a smile in response.

“Now then, let’s begin. And we will be speaking when I win” Mace warned, very clearly the Master of the Order.

Obi-Wan said nothing, his lips thinning as the match began.

---

The Master was gratified to see the young knight was panting a little as he yielded the match. Mace hadn’t won against Master Kenobi very often, in that first time around. It was good to know he still had some years left to enjoy it.

But not long, he noted. The young Knight was not there yet of course, but it he was good. Incredibly good for a Jedi of his level, using a difficult form. Mace was impressed.

“That was impressive. Very impressive Obi-Wan” he said, clapping him on the back as they both made to sit on the benches around the side of the dojo, Obi-Wan seemingly having lost the energy that fuelled his usual stubbornness, he allowed himself to be led by Mace.

“You’ve changed form.” the elder Jedi pointed out, cutting straight to the point. It was too early for beating around the munjabush.

“I have.” The young man beside him was looking at the floor as he answered. Mace felt the atmosphere in the room dip, the force tingling in his ears.

“Why?”

There was a pause. Obi-Wan kept looking at the floor.

Mace sighed.

“I hope you know, Obi-Wan, that you can tell me anything.” He said gently, projecting trust and safety at him through the force.

His young companion looked up at him with a watery smile. He took a breath.

“After Qui-Gon, after Naboo” he started slowly, seemingly choosing his words carefully “I kept trying…” he faltered, a faraway quality to his voice.

“Every time I started Ataru, I was back there behind the ray shields.” he said softly, looking down at the floor again. “After a bit of trial-and-error, it appeared to be a trigger for me, so I decided to change forms. Soresu seemed like a natural choice, I have a Padawan to defend now after all.”

Mace starred at him, finding himself once again at a loss. He knew Obi-Wan had changed forms at some point, but he’d never really given it much thought first. Lots of Knights experimented with new forms as soon as they were out of their Master’s shadow. But they generally didn’t do it incognito.

“Is that why you’ve been pushing yourself so hard? Coming here at all hours on top of everything else?” he asked, keeping his voice gentle.

His companion cleared his throat.

“It was difficult, at first. I didn’t…didn’t want anyone to know in case…” He trailed off.

Understanding dawned for Mace.

“In case you couldn’t do it.” He clarified, dismayed when he got a silent nod in return.

“Obi-Wan” Mace didn’t quite know what to say, working very hard to release his complicated emotions into the Force before the suddenly fragile man next to him picked up on them. Not least his slightly irrational anger.

“Please, please tell me you didn’t think we’d reject you or punish you because you couldn’t pick up a lightsabre.” He asked with a groan. The young man looked up at him in shock at the judgement in Mace’s tone. Giving him his answer.

“Er…”

Mace turned to him and shook his head in disbelief.

“Obi-Wan Kenobi, you are a talented, intelligent person who is an asset to the Order in more ways than I can list at this time in the morning. You are worth far more than your warrior skill” he took a breath, taking in the bewildered and slightly alarmed face next to him. “And I am sorry that that hasn’t been made clear to you.” He finished with a gentler tone, shame swelling slightly within him.

He felt a slight tug on his bond with Plo, the other Master picking up on the maelstrom he was feeling. They’d have to meditate later.

Obi-Wan obviously didn’t know what to say, and Mace was satisfied to let the words sink in for a moment.

“Do you think, perhaps, that it might be prudent for you to speak to someone about all this?” he suggested lightly. “We have an entire wing of Mind healers for a reason, my friend.”

Obi-Wan chewed his bottom lip, looking achingly young.

“I don’t know” he said slowly. “Qui-Gon never really liked…” he trailed off again, looking at the floor.

Mace rolled his eyes.

“Yes well, Force love him he was a good friend but Qui-Gon was a complicated man and let’s be honest, could be a bit of an idiot at times” he said, making sure his fondness for his old friend was obvious, pleased when it brought another watery smile out of his young friend.

“Maybe.” He admitted.

Mace decided to take what he could get.

“Please think about it. If you like, Plo or I could go with you” he offered. This time he did get a full smile and a slight eye roll in response.

“I’m sure I can handle it Master, I’m perfectly capable-“

“I know I know!” Mace held up his hands in defence “Just the offer is there.”

He stood up.

“Now then, time for bed I think” he activated his Senior Master mode, suddenly all business. “Please stop practicing at stupid hours of the morning, you’re making Master Drallig nervous. Sign yourself up for some proper tutoring” he instructed.

“Yes Master” Obi-Wan stood with a bow of acquiescence before they moved together towards the doors.

“Oh and Obi-Wan” Mace caught him as they closed the doors and stood in the silent corridor. “Do think about signing up for the tournament. You have a lot to offer.” He suggested.

The other Jedi hesitated.

“I…I will Master” he promised with a dip of his head.

“That’s all I ask” Mace reassured.

After they separated with one final bow of goodbye, Mace leant against the cool wall in relief, letting his emotions wash over him and into the Force, with the Force equivalent of a grunt from Plo down their bond.

He’d never known about Obi-Wan’s seemingly classic case of PTSD. And the obvious fear of rejection made his unrelenting quest for perfection and independence, that first time around, make sense.

But not this time. Mace smiled. They had a long way to go, but acknowledgement and mind healers were good, and Mace and Plo would be there every step of the way. This time.

[sleepyficss]

ROMANTIC TV HEADCANNONS PLEASE I WILL TAKE ANYTHING I AM STARVING VILLAGE ORPHAN ANON PLEASE BE KIND ENOUGH TO SPARE ME SOME CONTENT THAT I MAY FEAST OFF BEFORE THE WINTER KILLS ALL ME CROPS

tv headcanons.

tv x reader, romantic

authors note:

oouughhh after the recent tpot episode. i will admit, tv has grown on me. i was staring at him the entirety of the start to see what he had on his screen LOL “tay vay”. tv does deserve more love, he doesn’t get enough appreciation for how deep his character actually is :(

- tv is SUCH a cutie patootie.

- if you two were together before he developed his text-to-speech voice (pre-tpot), he didn’t want to use clips of other contestants to tell you that he loved you since it wouldn’t feel like it was fully from him :(

- he’ll wait for you to say the ‧₊˚ magic words ‧₊˚ (i love you), so that he could use YOU as a clip to say it back. even if it feels a little weird hearing yourself say that back.

- otherwise, when he gets his text-to-speech function, he surprises you with it!!

- after a long day of doing…. whatever it is that you do… you get to spend the rest of it with your favourite mechanical mind! already excited just to see him, the adoration and surprise you feel when his first words to you are “i love you”, in his own voice !!!

- he’s so happy with himself.

- tv is a little sad that he can’t hold your hand, fully cuddle with you, etc, especially when he sees others doing exactly that.

- he tries his hardest though, squishing himself close to you in a way that resembles nuzzling, walking closely next to you to mimic holding hands, and showering you with affectionate words :))

- he really loves it when you hug him, or at least ad much as you can – he might be a little wide.

- kisses too!! he can’t kiss back too well, but he’s always got a kissy face on, even if you can’t feel it. if he nudges his screen on your face, thats his best version of a kiss :’)

- if you’re ever feeling sad, tv remembers the things that made you laugh in the past, and plays clips of it in hopes that it will cheer you up.

- unless, of course, its not the right time for that – then he’ll stick to listening to your woes.

- he tries to offer advice, but despite being a ‘smart tv’, his emotions easily get the best of him; and if its a person who has wronged you, he isn’t afraid to offer to self-destruct at the cost of the wrong-doers life, and his own.

- of course you’re like, “ah ha – PLEASE don’t.”

- he really thinks you deserve so much, he’ll go all out for dates.

- if you make it clear that you don’t want to do anything extravagant, though – he’ll understand, and you two can just chill and watch a movie, or have a picnic.

- even if tv can’t exactly eat anything…

- otherwise, he’ll take you to a fancy restaurant (wearing his own little bowtie :3), or an amusement park!! although he’s a bit let down that he can’t really win any prizes from any minigame stalls.

- going stargazing!!! he would totally take you stargazing, and he knows the best days and times to go as well (he is, y’know, a smart tv – he knows exactly when and where to go).

- if you ever need a mirror to check your hair, makeup, etc, he’ll turn his screen into a mirror for you!! but he’ll add hearts around your face, or add those funny filters to your face – like dog ears or face-warps – to make you laugh.

- he is a touch screen tv (as i’ve learned from my favourite website, bfdi wiki <33), so you have to be careful near his screen in case you accidentally swipe on him!! although, he probably has a setting where he can turn it off.

- if you two ever get in an argument, which is unfortunately likely due to his stubborn nature; just swipe his screen so that his face disappears and he can’t talk to you.

- okay, maybe don’t do that, he’ll feel very hard-done by.

- if you’re also a robot, or electronically-made, your relationship will move a lot faster.

- tv will also find himself confiding in you a lot about feeling taken advantage of AS a mech, and how glad he is that you’re sticking by his side as with your similarities.

- if you are another type of object, it will take him a little longer to feel as comfortable with you – but that will just make your relationship even stronger when it does get to that point – being one of the non-mech objects that he truly trusts.

- having loyalty as one of his biggest strengths, you best believe that he’ll take your side in any argument against another person.

- if you’re battling for dream island as well, he’ll always immediately run to your side in hopes of being on the same team.

- even if you aren’t, he’ll help you (not your team!! just you) in challenges, despite his team getting annoyed at him doing so.

- tv would be so sad if you were voted out – if he was able to, he’d fake the votes on his screen to try and keep you from being eliminated (it doesn’t work, and he gets caught lolol).

- whether you get eliminated first, or vice versa, he gets so happy to see you again when the other gets eliminated too.

- gets lowkey clingy, but can you blame him? who knows how long it was until he got to see you again.

[fitsofdespair]

i have hesitated to say anything before now. in part because i removed myself from fandom discourse and really from actively discussing iwtv a year ago. i consider it all a lose-lose situation.

but also because i’m generally of the opinion that black fans don’t need people to be their white saviors, least of all me. black people have never been saved by white people. they were never just given anything when it comes to strides in equality, they fought for it and still fight for it, against constant violent pushback every step of the way. only instead of the good ole’ days when racists just called those fighting for equality uppity, they’re now “bullies” for daring to call you out on your shit after the repeated condescension and the resulting harassment you’ve exhibited towards them.

in this day and age the word bully has zero meaning anymore. i mean come on, melania trump calls people mean about her husband bullies. elon musk thinks he’s being bullied by twitter users, though he clearly holds all the power and is absolutely the problem. its become a meaningless word that goliaths use to call davids because they won’t use the real word they actually want to say. some of these popular blogs are not being bullied, they’re being held accountable for their own actions.

it’s pretty disgusting the number of you who decided to identify strongly with these users that not only fail to question their own racial biases but have gone so far as to suggest black people don’t face racism anymore. this is so fucked. tbh it can be argued in many ways white people, especially in the deep south where i’m from, are inherently raised steeped in racism, even if its not direct. just because your family aren’t ostensibly racist doesn’t mean they didn’t bake their own little prejudices into your upbringing and being raised in your environment didn’t encourage them. even if you don’t see yourself as racist, you have to unlearn all this shit, even if it never once occurred to you that you are part of it. just cause you believe in equality and don’t hate people for their color or cultural background does not make you free of perpetuating microaggressions against them. this applies to fans across the world of course. (like for you white euro iwtv fans, you may say you have no problem with black people but i’ve heard some wild things some of yall have to say about the turks.)

i understand that probably half or more of you are not usamericans. but no matter what environment you live in, no matter where you were raised, there is no excuse for your behavior. just because YOU don’t see racism in your day to day life or are in the more likely situation, too blindly comfortable in your place in society to notice it right in front of your face, doesn’t mean it doesn’t exist as a constant presence in other parts of the world or isn’t deeply ensconced in online rhetoric.

so for you white iwtv fans who can’t be fucked to mention let alone defend people you, in many cases once called friend, against the absolute horseshit your current comrades are spewing wrapped up in their nice safe cocoons of victimhood, i hope you do some serious soul searching to figure out if this is who you are, a person too cowardly to call out a friend because it might cost you their friendship. a person quick to condemn others on hearsay because you couldn’t be fucked to wonder am i on the right side of this? and if you do manage to get wise and change your mind, remember its not unforgivable to say, you know what? i was wrong. i wrote in an old post that the hallmark of being a functional adult is changing your views accordingly when you learn new information or even just ruminate on what you know (i myself was a little bitch about ep 5 when it first dropped until i had to sit down and ask myself why i was actually feeling some kind of way about it). dying on a hill is not all its cracked up to be. being told you’re wrong is not always a personal attack and its often an opportunity for improvement if you can be bothered to genuinely hear other people out. an alarming number from all walks of life never figure that out. for my part, i am still learning and hope i never stop learning.

while that sentiments all nice and gooey (i mean them, but i understand its still sacharine to put out there), i am still guilty for not having directly written anything about this until now. and thats on me and i earned any flack i get for that. again, i am more of the mindset that black people don’t need white spokespeople, but that doesn’t mean they'll mind allies. and as a sidebar, going out of your way to say you are rising “above the noise” or “ignoring the drama” is absolutely your right, but it does not make you superior. it just makes you complacent with the status quo. i mean as long as you get to squee!! about anything and everything who cares about other people, right?

[thejournallo]

Life hack: Auto-pilot

Have you ever arrived at your destination and realized you don't remember parts of the journey? Or opened your phone to check the time, only to find yourself scrolling through social media 20 minutes later? Welcome to autopilot mode—that fascinating psychological state where we operate without conscious awareness.

This week's Life Hacks explores the science behind psychological autopilot, why it happens, and how becoming aware of these unconscious patterns can help us reclaim intentionality in our lives.

What Is Autopilot Mode?

Autopilot mode refers to the psychological state where we perform actions without conscious attention or awareness. Unlike habits (which are learned behaviors we intentionally develop), autopilot behaviors often fly under our conscious radar. While habits can certainly operate on autopilot, not all autopilot behaviors are habits—some are simply unconscious patterns we've never examined.

Why Our Brains Love Autopilot

Our tendency to operate on autopilot isn't a flaw—it's actually a brilliant evolutionary adaptation. At its core, autopilot exists because our mind craves energy efficiency. The brain is remarkably energy-hungry, consuming a disproportionate amount of our body's resources despite making up only a small percentage of our body weight. By automating routine tasks, we conserve precious mental resources for more important decisions and novel situations.

This cognitive efficiency extends to our attentional capacity as well. Research suggests we can only consciously process a limited amount of information at once, so autopilot helps us navigate complex environments without experiencing cognitive overload. When behaviors become automatic, they require less neural activation, creating pathways that work more efficiently—like well-worn trails through a dense forest. This efficiency even enables us to perform multiple actions simultaneously, such as walking while having a deep conversation, something that would be nearly impossible if we had to consciously control every muscle movement.

How Autopilot Behaviors Form

Understanding how these unconscious patterns develop can help us recognize them in our daily lives. Autopilot behaviors primarily form through repetition—actions performed repeatedly create stronger neural pathways, gradually becoming more automatic over time. This process is similar to water carving a channel through rock; each repetition deepens the groove until the behavior flows effortlessly.

Our environment plays a crucial role too. Specific triggers in our surroundings can activate automated responses without our awareness, like automatically checking your phone when it buzzes or reaching for a snack when passing the kitchen. Emotional states contribute significantly to autopilot behaviors as well, as certain feelings can bypass our conscious decision-making entirely, triggering immediate responses like stress eating or defensiveness in conversations.

The brain also uses a fascinating process called chunking, where it groups sequences of actions into single units. This allows complex behaviors to run automatically once initiated—think about how you don't need to consciously remember each step of tying your shoes or making your morning coffee; you simply begin the sequence and it unfolds naturally.

The Hidden Cost of Autopilot

While autopilot mode serves important functions, it comes with significant downsides that affect our quality of life. Perhaps most concerning is how it diminishes our presence. Life literally passes us by when we're not consciously engaged—meals become forgettable, conversations blur together, and precious moments slip away unnoticed while our minds operate on default settings.

Autopilot also reduces our adaptability. When circumstances change, rigid automatic patterns can prevent appropriate adjustments, leaving us stuck in outdated behaviors that no longer serve us. This inflexibility extends to our relationships, where communication styles, reactions, and even arguments often run on autopilot, creating recurring conflicts that seem impossible to resolve.

Decision inertia represents another hidden cost. We continue making the same choices day after day without evaluating if they still align with our values and goals. This can lead to a profound disconnection between how we actually live and how we want to live, creating a subtle but persistent sense of discontent that's difficult to identify precisely because these choices happen below our conscious awareness.

Breaking the Autopilot Cycle

The good news is that awareness itself is the first step in changing these patterns:

1. Cultivate Mindful Awareness

Practice bringing gentle attention to everyday activities. Notice the sensation of water on your hands while washing dishes, or the feeling of your feet touching the ground while walking.

2. Create Pattern Interruptions

Small environmental changes can break automatic behaviors. Try:

Taking a different route to work

Using your non-dominant hand for simple tasks

Rearranging your morning routine

3. Install Conscious Decision Points

Create "if-then" plans that force conscious choice:

"If I pick up my phone, then I'll first state what I intend to do with it"

"If I feel stressed, then I'll take three deep breaths before responding"

4. Regular Self-Reflection

Ask yourself these questions daily:

"What did I do on autopilot today?"

"Were these behaviors helpful or unhelpful?"

"What triggered these automatic responses?"

Your Turn

This week, try this simple exercise:

Choose one daily activity you normally do without thinking (Walking, showering, eating breakfast) and commit to experiencing it fully. Notice textures, sensations, thoughts, and feelings that arise.

This simple practice can begin rewiring your brain for greater awareness.

Remember: The goal isn't to eliminate autopilot mode (which would be exhausting and counterproductive), but rather to recognize when it's happening and choose consciously when it matters most.

Becoming aware of our autopilot behaviors isn't about perfection—it's about reclaiming choice.

I've been working on breaking my own autopilot patterns lately, especially my tendency to reach for my phone whenever I feel a moment of boredom or discomfort.

I'm definitely still a work in progress, but there's something powerful about just noticing it happening. That split second of 'oh, I'm doing that thing again' feels like a tiny victory, it definitely feels great.

and as always if you have any questions, im here to answer!

-The journallo

[atiny-for-life]

Mini Lore Nugget #8:

Mini Lore Nuggets - Masterlist

In the Fever Part.2 Diary Entries, we learned that Z-World's government really started shooting up on the waking-nightmare-scale after they began running AI simulations to come up with the "best" policies to implement for maximum control and efficiency.

What resulted from these simulations was that the AI determined all crimes and terrorism were strictly the result of human emotions. Therefore, the best way to rid the world of such suffering must be to eradicate emotions and all which might evoke it.

Z's government developed technology to essentially numb the population - the chips we later learned about in the World Ep.1 Diary Entries. In the Fever Part.3 Diary Entries, we then got some additional info on the AI software used by the government: it was an AI system which utilized deep learning technology and ran uncontrolled for a while as the government awaited its results.

During this time, the system began treating human emotion as a bug - perhaps because it couldn't understand it - and it also started estimating humans' individual energy, thereby reducing it to a product. And since it found it to be a product, it also began treating it as a tradeable commodity.

Instead of questioning these results, the government was more likely delighted, because they immediately took over this new energy trading platform, banned all arts and emotions, and wilfully stripped the population of its humanity by treating them as nothing more than components needed to maintain the governments' idea of a utopia.

Out here in the real world, we've also begun to see the crazy amount of negative consequences since AI technology has become widely implemented in pretty much all areas of life:

#1 - Use of AI in Healthcare

In the US, the healthcare system has been relying on AI powered algorithms to guide health care decisions, but due to the data sampled by the AI, extreme racial bias has crept in and is actively putting black lives at risk. To quote Science Journal:

At a given risk score, Black patients are considerably sicker than White patients, as evidenced by signs of uncontrolled illnesses. Remedying this disparity would increase the percentage of Black patients receiving additional help from 17.7 to 46.5%.

Furthermore, the data sourced by AI for global use (such as in risk-prediction) is often extremely biased in other ways as well: radiology manuscripts are over represented, the majority of documents sourced are authored by men, and data-poor regions are grossly underrepresented, meaning the majority of information sourced comes from the US and China. [Source]

#2 - YouTube's Algorithm Is Messed Up

According to the Tech Transparency Project which has gathered data from another study:

YouTube recommended hundreds of videos about guns and gun violence to accounts for boys interested in video games. Some of the recommended videos gave instructions on how to convert guns into automatic weapons or depicted school shootings. Many of the videos violated YouTube’s own policies on firearms, violence, and child safety, and YouTube took no apparent steps to age-restrict them. YouTube also recommended a movie about serial killer Jeffrey Dahmer to minor accounts.

Further watching on dumb stuff YouTube AI features have done to fuck people over:

#3 - Ethics Has Left the Chat

#4 - The Physical Cost of Generative AI

Where Meta has recently constructed a 2 million square foot data facility in Georgia, a nearby living couple have documented the devastating consequences to the environment and their lives.

Facilities like these are used to power stuff like Chat GPT, Gemini, etc.:

In order for them to function as needed, they put a huge toll on the power grid and require the construction of an entirely new infrastructure atop the usual servers, storage systems and networking equipment.

For one, AI data centres require high-performance graphics processing units (GPUs) which come with their own required infrastructure needs (advanced storage, networking, energy and cooling capabilities). The sheer number of GPUs necessary for AI use alone then already add a ton more square footage to the size of the data centre.

On top of that, living in a county with a data centre like this in the US drives up the cost of electricity for everyone in the county.

And what does all this mean for the environment? Deforestation. Light pollution. Air pollution. Here is a still frame from a video shot by a woman living over 366 meters away from an AI centre's construction site:

All this pollution then started seeping into the ground water, resulting in this:

And what does that mean for someone living nearby? Dishwashers breaking. Washing machines breaking. Water pressure dropping to the point where you can't even flush a toilet anymore because all the pipes are clogged with sediment.

On a global scale, it should also be noted that:

According to the Washington Post in collaboration with the University of California, Riverside, writing a single 100-word email in Open AI's ChatGPT is the equivalent of consuming just over one bottle of water.

Shaolei Ren, an associate professor of engineering at UC Riverside, says that while "We haven’t come to the point yet where AI has tangibly taken away our most essential natural water resources," the use of AI in places with frequent droughts has caused rising tension between communities who need the water and data centers. Not to mention, hardware production pollutes water, per a study initially published in January 2015 in the Journal of Cleaner Production, due to the extraction of precious minerals like boron, silicon, and phosphorous.

[Source]

UPDATE:

A new video has been released which takes a look at Memphis where Elon Musk had the data center built that allows for Twitter's Chat-Bot Gronk to exist, and here is what was discovered:

No regulatory body has been informed of what is operating within that facility.

Large turbines are causing noise pollution (far more turbines than is reasonable).

The building emits a disturbing smell.

Aerial and thermal footage obtained of the site has revealed that:

The air quality in the entire area has been severely degraded to the point of causing health issues for people living in the area:

Continuing, Alexis shared her grandfather's story of how he developed Chronic Obstructive Pulmonary Disease (COPD) despite being a non-smoker-

- and continuous by saying her, her mother, and grandmother all three also developed respiratory illnesses (asthma and bronchitis in Alexis's case and just bronchitis in her mother and grandmother's case):

Another local is dealing with much the same issue:

If you're still not convinced of how truly horrific the situation is:

And if you're now wondering how all this could happen, I've got one word for you: DOGE. Together with the Trump administration, funds for the EPA have been slashed to the point where they're basically non-functional:

Presently, should everything continue on this set path, then...

These videos provided the screenshots used above:

#5 - Use of AI in Warfare

Israel has been using untested and undisclosed AI-powered databases in order to identify targets and plan bombing campaigns throughout Gaza, which has reportedly led to the loss of thousands of civilian lives.

And who provided this technology? Google. For fear of losing business to Amazon. And not just them. Microsoft too has been collaborating with the Israeli military, as has Amazon who collaborated with Google in 2021 to establish "Project Nimbus" which continues on to this day with zero transparency or accountability.

Sources: x | x

Beyond that, even after the bombs were dropped, drones would come in to specifically target surviving children and it is known that Israel utilized AI-powered drones for carrying out precise assassinations and various combat missions.

The video below is timestamped to when this surgeon retells the horrors of what happened to the children while he was working in the Gaza strip:

Outside of Israel, Ukraine has also been using AI-technology in its warfare:

Further reading on the topic:

#6 - AI-Generated Art

With AI-generated art flooding social media and streaming platforms on the daily, it's getting harder and harder for new artists to enter the scene. On top of that, all the recommendations you're getting online - be that on an image search, streaming platform or elsewhere - are also all the result of AI-powered algorithms.

And as we all know, generative AI is trained on data banks filled to the brim with stolen art from non-consenting artists across the globe - be that musicians, painters, photographers, voice actors, chefs, or writers.

All of this ultimately shapes the world we live in. Those in the know are now full of mistrust of corporations, new information, articles, and media. Anything and anyone is being accused of using AI when they post something online by skeptics, and those who don't know any better are living in blissful ignorance while they're being spoon-fed misinformation left, right, and center.

Further watching on generative AI as a whole:

Further reading:

Final Note:

Not all AI is bad, of course. There have been major breakthroughs in all fields of science thanks to AI which will bring about positive change for (hopefully) all of humanity.

But the problem is that the technology is developing far too quickly for lawmakers to keep up with (as planned, most likely, by all the billionaire tech bros on this planet) and generative AI in particular should have never been made publicly accessible. It should have remained in the hands of trained professionals who know how to use it responsibly.