#doing what i can tho. just. trying to survive.

[orcelito]

GREAT news. My fever has uh. Not quite broken bc it's still at 100 degrees, but it's much better than the 101.1 it Refused to go down from earlier!

Cold wet cloth is a godsend

Gonna eat food and then try to get. Some sleep. Maybe. Who knows lol

[thewritingpossum]

Forgot to mention it but there was a huge debate at my study group the other day about wether or not you could call yourself an historian after getting your bachelor degree and two of my favorite profs were defending opposing views and they were trying to keep it light and funny but you could see that they were getting lowkey heated and for a so-called academic I actually don't do that well with conflicts so I was like haaa mom and dad stop arguing!! T_T but anyway, my one german prof that some have called 'intimidating' went to see me me and my buddy who accidentally started the debate earlier (by joking that he was about to graduate and could finally call himself an historian), put his arms around our shoulders and kindly told us that we could call ourselves historians if we want so I guess that was some nice validation lmao

[daz4i]

suicide and general negativity ig

i hate that english doesn't have a good word for מיואש (filled with despair. hopeless? ig) bc this is how i'm feeling fr

there is just. nothing good. and there is so much bad - both BAD bad bc of the war but also mundane bad bc yknow, Life - that i'm getting so overwhelmed i can't handle anything

my whole month is filled with medical shit and there's probably gonna be even more bc i need more tests and they're all just. such a pain to do (it sounds whiny but genuinely i can't handle them. just thinking abt them makes me so anxious bc they all require lots of painful preparation, sometimes for a few days, and they're so gross and require being poked with needles which my medical trauma certainly isn't helping with. and even tho i did so many already they can't find shit and i'm so tired i'm so done with this body

and like. it'd be one thing if i wanted to live. if i wanted to make my life better or thought it was possible. but by now i know it's not and i know i won't so it just becomes infinitely harder. like if i compare life to being in prison, it feels like the warden decided to torture me just for fun to make it even worse

but there is nothing good there is nothing to look forward to bc everything is shit and nothing's worth it and i hate when ppl tell me to enjoy the little things bc there is nothing to enjoy about them either. i can't have most of them anyway. i wish i could. but this shitty ass body and fucked up brain won't let me

there is no future for me i know i'm never gonna amount to anything when i can't even do the most basic shit about being human, literally how am i gonna be able to fulfill my """"potential"""" when i can't even do stuff like eat or sleep normally. when i can't go outside. when i can't handle being around people. when my body crashes and burns after standing for a few minutes or walking for more than a couple hundred meters. what even IS there for me to achieve in such a state. the only win i can have is getting out of bed and it doesn't feel like a win because i don't. want. to live. i have fucking professionals, people getting paid to help me do at least some of these things, and i can't bring myself to even take the first step bc just thinking about it makes me clam up so bad i can't move or talk and everything starts hurting so much more

there's not even. mundane fun. or joy. bc no one i know has time or energy for that. bc that's just what being an adult is ig. not that there's much to do in order to have fun anyway. like i said nothing to look forward to everything is so shit and nothing actually brings me joy anyway and it's not like i can handle being around people enough to help with that

i was not meant to be alive i am not designed to exist and like at this point I'd assume my who knows how many near death experiences may have been the universe trying to correct the mistake that is my existence and for some reason not managing to pull through the final stretch

i'm so tired i'm so done with this i wish i could be killed in some certain quick way bc i can't. i can't handle any of this. this is too much

[todayisafridaynight]

oh i would could and should draw but ghhhhhggg rock candy...

[gazelessmenagerie]

( -wakes up this morning only to have one-shot thoughts of what if tiflora managed to make it off the planet or something happens to cause it and survives the planet’s explosion but there’s nothing she would know of both paragus and broly surviving as well. with the loss of the saiyan race, planet, and her family, there’s nothing much to do than keep pressing forward and eventually she finds herself as either a merc for hire or participates in some space gladiator ring. both? to make her living.- )

[waywardsalt]

mmm

[robinsnest2111]

thinking about everyone who experienced me, premium front row seats and audience participation included, at my absolute worst and still want to have something to do with current day me. idk what I did to deserve you peeps in my life and I hope every single day I can be a good friend to you now that I'm actively trying to heal 🙏

[the-kipsabian]

sorry if im insufferable this week btw, i have to get up every day before 7.30 cause they do construction in the apartments of my building and we have no schedule when and where exactly so all info we have is five days 7.30am to 4pm and they will come in and out multiple times and will come in with a universal key if they have to so :')

i will mcfucking DIE and its already 4am and im gonna sleep probably less than three and a half hours tonight cause im a disaster insomniac YAY

[gandreida]

This is the least depressed I have felt in years

[partapotso]

Oh if carpet beetles were smart, they'd sense my rage and bloodlust and split to atoms this instant to avoid any possible contact with me. Too bad all they care about is scaring the love of my life and having babies, which we haven't seen yet and hopefully never will. When will I win the lottery so we'll have our own house... or an apartment in a new building... imagine

[daz4i]

when ww said "this is not my life, I'm no survivor, i only happened to survive"

[tonysbed]

Love, Cars and leaked tapes | MV1 & ???

max verstappen x driver!reader

Summary: Max Icloud gets hacked, which resolves in a sextape leak. Max suddenly gets scared that he still has the tape of Vegas 21 on his phone..

warnings: Talk abt sex, leaked sextape, sexual language, swearing?

Your face was pale, hands gripping your phone and eyes wide. You had told Max hundreds of times to not keep any tapes on his phone in case of things like this.

Someone had gained access to Max’s Icloud and leaked your sextape. You were a little relieved when you saw which one it was. Just a simple ‘vanilla’ missionary sex video. Nothing to special. It could’ve gone worse.

The front door of your shared apartment slammed shut “Schatje? Where are you?” His voice seemed stressed “Living room” You yelled back.

His frame appears before you “Lifje I’m so sorry. I didn’t know it was still on there. God I’m so stupid” He sat down at the other end of the sofa.

You sighed “See the positive” He raised his eyebrows “What’s positive to this?” You crawled over to him and laid your head in his lap “It wasn’t anything worse”

His eyes widened “Oh god, Did I delete Vegas 21 from my phone?” His fingers trying to fish his phone out of his pocket “Max”

He frantically starts searching his phone “Max” He didn’t show a reaction.

“Max Emilian Verstappen.” You hissed. His eyes shot up to you “You didn’t. There aren’t any more leaked tapes, AND Vegas 21 was one of the first that went into a USB-Stick” You smiled gently “It will be okay”

He nodded, opening his arms for you. You smiled again and climbed onto his lap, his arms locking around you.

“At least everyone knows who makes you feel so good, mh?” His eyes lock onto yours “Mh..Could say the same for you. You kept whimpering” He chuckled “Cause your a dirty little minx and kept clenching around me”

Your voice lowered “Oh and you didn’t like that?” Max eyes glinted with a hint of lust “I didn’t say that, did I?” You shake your head and place a kiss on his jaw.

“Lifje, jesus. We have a meeting over this.” You chuckled but kept placing wet kisses on his jaw and neck. His hand suddenly grabbed your throat.

“Enough, before you’ll see what happens. You know I don’t like bad girls” He grumbled “And you’re my good girl, right?” You nod, unable to form words “Good. Now let’s go”

The walk into the paddock the next day was weird to say the least. Even tho you both showed up confidently.

Headline over headline was thrown your way.

-

Enews

739.540 likes

Enews Even after yesterdays Events, Max Verstappen and Y/n Y/l/n strutted into the paddock. L/n more than Verstappen. He seemed more quiet and intimidated by the loud media and quickly went into his garage. Y/n went over to fans, signed stuff and took pictures with Fans. Once the tape was mentioned she rolled her eyes but laughed a little “Of course it’s not great but there’s nothing I can do now so..Yeah We’re good.I think there could’ve been worse leaked so..” She shrugged and then answered why Max simply slipped into the garage “He’s just annoyed by it so leave Max be a little, yeah?”

user93 NOT GREAT? Maybe not for you but jeez..Mans been hitting it good :o

user29 No wonder the man is always calm, he’s got himself a relief there 😨

user74 can’t get over the fact that he called her ‘good girl’ HOW IS SHE SURVIVING?!

user82 There’s more proof that they’re the hottest couple ever

user26 love how light she’s taking it (the leak not max)

user97 just died at this 😭

user63 man is packing 😃

After the race, neither you or Max went into the interviews. To exhausted by all the pressure and questions about the tape. Yet you had to because you both got on the podium with Charles.

You were sitting between them, fidgeting with the microphone. Max seemed more relaxed than he did this morning. He looked over to you and nudged your knee with his.

He mouthed ‘You okay?’ You nodded and smiled shortly. Luckily the reporters respected your wish that there were no questions about the tape. Well, until the last reporter started asking about the tape. Before you or Max could say something, Charles spoke up.

“I don’t think this is necessary. They both have been so kind about the prying eyes and questions, kept their calm but it’s enough. This was a complete invasion of their private life and it’s so disrespectful. You wouldn’t want that happening to you either, right? It’s so brave that they actually sat down here, even tho they knew there was a high chance of this happening. This is supposed to be about our cars and performance, not any disgusting invasion of privacy.”

You smiled at Charles and so did Max. He shot you both a smile back and the reporter just went back to his seat.

After you wrapped up and walked to your car with Max, you saw charles walking across the parking lot. You pulled at Max’s shirt “We should say thank you, don’t you think” He nodded “I’ll go” You say and jog over to the Ferrari driver.

“Charles!” He turned around and his tense expression immediately relaxed “Yeah?”

“I-No we wanted to thank you again. It was really kind of you in there” He smiled “No problem. It’s just so unfair for you two. Really sorry that people are like this” You chuckle “As long as you’re not like them” He shook his head and laughed “Absolutely not”

She gave him a quick hug “See you next week” He nodded “Rest well” You smile “You too”

You walked back to your car and sat in the passenger seat “Still glad that it wasn’t Vegas 21 to be honest” Max said while keeping his eyes on the road “Yeah, That would’ve been a bigger scandal than this one.”

Max nodded and laid his hand on your left thigh “Well be alright” You placed your hand on top of his “Yes we will. Especially with you by my side” He chuckled “I love you”

“I love you more”

I randomly had this idea while making a Lewis edit. Don’t ask how the hell that was connected but here we are.

Do you want a part where you see what happens in Vegas?:0

I didn’t proofread cause it’s like past midnight and I’m way to tired to I apologise for any mistakes 🤧

Vegas Part

[rad-batson]

Headcanons of Tim and Damian’s Love/Hate/But-Mostly-Begrudging-Love Relationship (They’re My Babies)

They will take EVERY opportunity to be a little bitch to one another

Tim: “Don’t get too close to me. You probably have rabies.” Damian: *actually bites him*

Damian tripped Tim once, which started an all out prank war that lasted several months. It only ended when Bruce walked into a glue trap and couldn’t reach his phone to call for help. But he couldn’t figure out who put it there so they were both grounded. (It was Tim.)

Tim teaches Damian to finish his vine references when Bruce tells them they need to “bond.” They proceed to try and speak in exclusively vine references and TikTok sounds during patrol. Bruce benches them for his own sanity.

Damian: “I’m not touching you” *gets pushed down the stairs*

Tim: “I’m not in your room” *gets hit in the face with a book*

Tim calls Damian short even tho he’s only like two inches taller for quite a bit of time (and Damian never hears the end of it after Tim’s growth spurt)

Family Game Night could go in one of two ways: they’re opponents and spend the whole night one-upping each other OR they team up and wipe the floor with everyone else’s pieces

Damian: “Just trust me.” Tim: *remembering that one time Damian tried to kill him* “Okay.”

Tim: “Don’t ask questions.” Damian: *recalling the multiple genocidal Tim variants* “Whatever.”

During one Wayne Gala, they make up this game called Freestyle Checkers where they choose guests as their “pieces” then subtly manipulate them into walking to their opponent’s side of the ballroom without talking to someone from the other team or they’re out. No one can know that they’re part of a game or their opponent wins by default.

Bruce is proud of them at first for being more sociable during galas until he realizes what’s going on and immediately loses five years from his lifespan.

Both have attempted to fake their deaths to get out of the same school project

They’re both notorious for stalking people to get information instead of just…ya know…asking like a normal person. So they’re bound to team up one day.

Like maybe it’s Bruce’s birthday soon and both are like “No, I’m getting him the better present,” but then they run into each other in the vents trying to find out what he wants and they end up trading secrets. Just brotherly things

Tim: “I need you to follow this guy for me. I think he’s our culprit.” Damian: “I would rather die than take orders from you.” Tim: “I’ll buy you that fancy oil painting kit you want.” Damian: *already changing into his Robin gear* “Where is he?”

Tim makes Damian play the dumb, helpless kid in all of their covert operations, which pisses Damian off until he gets so good at it that he uses it to his advantage and annoys the hell out of Tim when they’re paired up for public appearances

“God, he’s so annoying.” “Yeah, totally.” “What the fuck did you say about my brother?”

Damian is the only person who can get Tim to actually sleep for once. No one knows how he does it, but the strongest theory so far is blackmail

Tim “I’m ignoring Bruce’s instructions because they failed the vibe check” Drake and Damian “I can totally do this mission that requires four people on my own” Wayne teaming up behind Bruce’s back and immediately getting into deep shit but somehow making it out alive with the bad guys behind bars.

During one of said missions, they thought they were going to die and said “I love you” to one another. After they survived, they silently agreed to never mention it again.

Damian gifts Tim a new board that he designed for his birthday. It took weeks. Tim cries

[prismatic-bell]

HEY EVERYONE

Do you enjoy the idea of Sticking It To The Man, but also you’re fucking tired? Maybe you appreciate the idea of direct action of some kind but ADHD, depression, or physical disability has made it nigh-on impossible for you to actually, you know, do shit?

Well, friends, allow me to introduce you to a small but significant thing you can do to Stick It To The Man while also benefiting your own mental health:

I haven’t bought green onions in a year.

If you’re sitting here thinking “holy shit, Nina, those look like hell,” you’re not wrong—they’re recovering from some unintended abuse. They survived two weeks in triple digits (that’s upward of 35 degrees for y’all with the weird sciencey math units) while I, uh. Forgot to water them. The outer layers dried out to protect the inner layers and as soon as I watered these thirsty bitches they went

They literally looked dead three weeks ago. So yeah, they’re not too pretty right now, but you wouldn’t be either, and they’re bouncing back nicely.

So, how to do this simple thing?

1) obtain dirt and a pot. You’ll want to do this first because the next steps go surprisingly fast. My green onions live in a 6” terracotta pot and some gardening topsoil, but you can use potting mix (not Miracle Gro tho, that stuff is trash), dirt from outside if you live in a place where it’s safe to do so, any kind of soil will do provided it’s clean and doesn’t contain pests (although most pests will leave alliums alone because they hate the smell). To be clear, because we love and respect our biosphere in this house, “pests” in this context means “bugs that specifically will attack green onions while providing no benefit to either the onions or any other plants you may have.” The pot is mandatory, however—if you want to do this year-round, you need to be able to move the onions inside/outside as weather allows/demands.

2) buy some green onions. You can skip straight to step 4 from here if you want, but if you’re planning to use them first…

3) cut them only to the tops of the white bits. In other words you ONLY want to use the green part.

4) put the white bits in a ramekin, measuring cup, etc. with some water. I’ve used things as big as juice glasses for this, but that’s really on the big end. Put your container in a window with some sun.

5) 3-5 days later, you should see about half an inch of root growth on the bottoms of your onions, and possibly the beginnings of a tiny green spear at the top. (Maybe a bit more, if they’re overachievers.) Plant them in your pot with just a bit of the white sticking up overtop of the soil.

6) water just a little bit, every other day. You want the soil to always be moist to the touch, but never out and out wet.

7) watch them sprout. This is excellent for your mood, by the way. Science says having and tending green things provides visible benefits to both your physical and mental health. We also know that making tangible things is good for your mental health, and green onions grow quickly, so you get benefits fast.

8) As they grow, you can reduce watering to three times per week because they’ll be able to store more water. The leaves will feel firm and “thick” (you’ll understand what I mean when you get to feel a properly-watered green onion) when they have enough water, much like a succulent’s leaves will get thicker and firmer when it’s well-hydrated, so it’s relatively easy to tell if they need a drink.

9) trim your onions as you need them! I try to never take more than 3-4 leaves in a week—about half a bunch—so it has time to grow more, but if you live with a bunch of people you can get around this by just starting more green onions. Buy three or four bunches and plant them all. They don’t go bad because they literally just grow until you need them. I’ve actually planned meals around “I have not used enough green onions lately and the leaves are bending under their own weight, I need to trim some tops.” Although the ones you see in the grocery store have open tops, you’ll notice closed spears on your new leaves, and these are completely edible. Yes, I regret to tell you they cut off and probably waste the tapered bits just for The Aesthetic. They’re just like any other green part of the onion.

AND YOU WILL NEVER NEED TO BUY GREEN ONIONS AGAIN. Just add a little soil now and again to replenish the nutrients.

Yes, they’re cheap. Yes, this is a small thing. But many small things added together are a big thing. And when you’re confident in your green onions, if you have the desire and ability to do more, there are many other plants you can grow from grocery-store starters.

GO FORTH. ENJOY THIS KNOWLEDGE.

[weird-is-life]

Okay so, how about reader and Spencer Reid doing smth where they need to exchange kisses now and then. Reader has a crush on Spencer and can’t keep kissing him. It becomes too much for them. So one day reader tells him smth along the lines of him needing to stop kissing her like he means it. Bcuz she’s going to read into things wrongly and end up breaking her own heart” and Spencer answers with smth along the lines of “that’s b’cus I do mean it. Every single time. Ur just too dense to see it.”

But u write it like u want. I wanna give u creative freedom. It was just a thought. And if u don‘t wanna write it, that’s okay too. I hope u have a nice day :)

Ty for the request, lovely🥰! Hopefully, this is okay. Warnings: pet names, little angsty, fluff, mentions of kisses ofc, (0.5k)

Spencer keeps kissing you, well you keep kissing each other and it honestly drives you a little mad. Not because you don't enjoy it, you do, a lot actually, but because you don't know what the kisses mean.

They leave you so confused, you don't know what to think of them. Especially when Spencer kisses you so lovingly every single time. His kisses leave you breathless and confused at the same time.

So right now, as he leans in to kiss you again, being at your place to watch a movie, you turn your head away from his. You almost wince, when you notice Spencer's baffled and definitely a little hurt expression.

"What's wrong?" he immediately asks, worried, that he's done something wrong.

"I-I...it's just...," you try to find the right words, but you don't know how to tell it to him. You look down at your fiddling hands, just so you don't have to look at his worried, puppy eyes.

"It's okay, if you don't want me kissing you, I won't do anything, you don't want me to, I'm sorry, if I made you uncomfortable," he carefully takes one of your hands in his as he apologises.

"No, I do want to!" you say maybe a little too quickly, the embarrassment of it makes your cheeks go red.

"Yeah?" Spencer grins at you, not cheekily tho, softly as always.

You bury your hot face into your hands.

"What is it, huh? You can tell me anything, you know that right?" Spencer doesn't really understand what's going on. He's thought, you liked him, like he does you.

You take a few big breaths and then you slowly put your arms away from your face.

"It's just...I need you to stop kissing me, Spencer," you blurt out and it comes out differently than you intended it to be. Spencer looks stunned.

You try again, " I need you to stop kissing me Spence, 'cause I'm afraid, I'm reading into things wrong and I'm worried, that I'll just break my own heart by doing so."

Spencer is sure, that his relief could be seen from miles away. He was waiting for the worst possible rejection from you, but he definitely wasn't expecting this.

You look at Spencer's face, only to find him looking right back at you with the biggest happy smile ever.

"You're such an idiot, if you think, that you're readings into things wrong," Spencer starts, " because I like you. I wouldn't be kissing you, if I didn't mean it, sweetheart."

It takes you a few seconds to process, what you've just heard, but when you finally do, your whole face lights up. Spencer likes you back? This isn't a dream?

"Really?"

"Yeah, really. But I thought, you knew that already," he chuckles at your cluelessness, he really did think, that you knew.

"I don't know, what I thought," you say sheepishly.

Spencer doesn't think, he can survive looking at your cute, shy expression with the rosy cheeks any longer, so he just leans in to kiss you.

Of course, he gives you a moment to push him away, in case you still don't want him kissing you, but you don't do anything like that. Instead you are the one to finally connect your lips with his. Not afraid to show him how much you like him, too.

[seuonji]

彡on a variety show w your svt bf!

๑ idol!svt x idol!yn secret relationship series! no storyline, just fun.

one ๑ two ๑ three ๑ four ๑ five ๑ six ๑ seven #mlist

notes ๑ variety show 'my alcohol diary' has mentions of drinking & getting drunk.

your group plays esports (valorant, leave of legends, apex, etc) against svt as a hybe special!

wonwoo gives you a look when you both sit at the end of your respective tables, you on the right, him on the left making you two sort of beside each other.

as you both play, the host points out that your skills are extremely good. your group member brings up the fact that recently you’ve been spending a lot more time gaming in your free time to which wonwoo rests his head on his hand to cover his smile knowing that he’s the reason you’ve been gaming more. the host adds on that your play style is a bit similar to wonwoo giving both groups chills. “perhaps it’s what’s adapted after a long time of playing,” you calmly respond.

on the other hand with soonyoung— he keeps messing up, at one point he shot one of his members, “the keyboard isn’t following what i want to do.” and you’d fr just face palm yourself. the host mentions, “even yn is getting tired of your antics.” “what antics!? im really trying.” you hope he can make it when technology evolves further. after filming you meet up with him. “wasn’t i cool earlier?” he asks. “i think my baby cousin can beat you.”

jeonghan would be such a menace in this scenario cause omg he would target you. like if he spots you he will not stop shooting and chasing until he gets you— your group member watching all of this go down would try to shoot jeonghan yet somehow he’s dodging and still hunting you down— “let me breathe!?” jeonghan shouts at your member. “you’re not letting ME breathe?” you shout back.

๑

random play dance! (random song is played and you have to dance the correct choreography)

beforehand you'd ask seungkwan to help you with the dances but he was not about to help you out while you were in a different group! until in one of the rounds where you looked lost, seungkwan comes to the front and dances clearly as a way to help you. "you're helping the other groups! get to the back," competitive seungcheol would shout. "sorry i got excited," seungkwan laughs it off. being fr tho how does that man know that many choreographies.

i imagine seokmin/mingyu would whisper to you, "i got you, just follow me," and then he would be one of the first to be eliminated.

vernon keeps on looking at you and copying your dance— you can’t help but laugh at his facial expressions when he doesn’t know the dance but also somehow he’s surviving.

wherever you are in the arena, chan always ends up beside you.

๑

youngji's program 'my alcohol diary'

you’d go alone to promote your groups album. your episode was relatively short— they covered it up with 'yn got drunk super fast' but actually, whether you have a high tolerance or not, in the end when you got drunk, you just kept on gushing about your boyfriend. (bf can be any member)

when youngji asked you to teach her the dance of your song you went through it step by step until a certain part, “oh soonyoung choreographed this part and i gave it as a suggestion and it made the cut to the official choreo,” you said with a big smile. // “my boyfriend likes this part,” you danced the bit then nonchalantly continued to teach youngji but she’s standing, there still in shock of everything she’s heard.

after filming, your boyfriend would pick you up and take care of you till you sober up.

the next day youngji would message and reveal something to you.

yn: im so sorry for the short episode run-

youngji: if it makes you feel better, seungcheol/soonyoung/mingyu/minghao talked about you way more than you did about them.

๑

chinese whisper game as a mini game (there’s a given word/phrase and the word is passed on through all players, last players needs to shout it out word for word)

you’re standing in front of jeonghan/minghao and he keeps on blowing into your ear before he starts actually saying the given phrase—

but if it was the noise cancellation version (have to read lips or body actions to get the word/phrase)

seungcheol pouted at you when you couldn’t understand what he was saying which a lot of viewers found weird since he would usually only do that with his members.

you almost hug jeonghan/joshua/wonwoo when he got the word correct—

jun/wonwoo/jihoon keeps on giving you high-fives every round.

you consider choking soonyoung when he can’t get the word correct for shit.

you and minghao/chan kept on bickering over the way he would execute the word. the staff and your members would be more interested on how you guys fight rather than the word being finally passed over to the last person.