#don't cancel me im nice
Note
The other anon was kinda right about the jihu thing though.. I mean it is weird from the start for minors to even write anything abt people older than them 🤷♂️
hey i hope what im abt to say doesnt offend you 💕 also hoping im not interacting with a grown ass man but wtv!! if ur this worried to the point u have the balls to say another persons name on someone elses blog while shading them then address this to the actual person u fucking moron. again, no offense ❤️
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My storage unit, a year ago almost exactly, was $87/mo.
Today, when the bill came out, it's $126. They did not inform me of any change to the amount, nor did they honor their giant "first month free" banner outside.
The exact same unit I'm renting, if I put used one online right now? $68.
SO WHY THE FUCK AM I BEING CHARGED LIKE DOUBLE THAT?! HELLO????
#they literally won't respond to me either#i went in there about 5 months ago to ask what new features justified me being charged like $10/mo and they didn't say a word#guy just smiled and wrote a number down for me on a piece of paper#and the people on the phone line didn't say shit either#raging. seething. ripping the storage unit people apart limb from limb#I'm going in there tomorrow after work and saying i either need the rate for a bew customer#or im canceling and opening a new one#and I'll just move my shit to another 5x10 fucking box#all this just so my mom's nasty ass cats don't piss on my things#they've already destroyed everything i have here - including a bed i spent 3k on because I've never had a nice bed#yep. smells like cat piss. even through the waterproof liner thing it came with.#i love my life. i love living with my mom. I'm definitely not about to commit suicide
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ARMY OF THE DOOMSTAR KAIJU BATTLE?????????????
#army of the doomstar#mtl#JUST WATCHED IT. MAN.#maybe the army of the doomstar is the friends we made along the way#maybe the great uniting is also the friends we made along the way#ALSO ALL OF DETHKLOK IS VOICED BY TWO PEOPLE????? i knew b small and t blacha did A Lot of the voices#but i didnt know it was THAT many until the credits. egads. holy shit#ANYWAY THEY MADE SELATCIA A BIG OL KAIJU WITH LASER BEAMS. AS HE SHOULD BE#love the increasing trend of western movies ending this way btw. it kinda rules#also um. i get nickles fans now#not that i disliked it before or anything but like. shit yeag. aotd really kinda hammered that in#charles was like hey man nathan's got prophecy stuff to do and he just got dumped so he needs a homoerotic rebound turn in your friendship.#can you do that for me? and pickles delivered#good movie. hell yeah#but also it made me realize (new arrival/mtl fan since um a week ago) how incomplete the original ending was#like shit im so glad they actually got to make this. you don't see a lotta cancelled stuff get closure after a decade. it's nice#AND YEAH IM A SUCKER FOR DETHKLOK BEING NICE TO EACH OTHER. OK.#power of friendship ass metal show#but also it made me realize i think im missing something? ive seen some scenes floating around that i never encountered in the show or aotd#wheres sloppy narles..... did i miss an episode or something? hm. will investigate. maybe it's a deleted scene thing#JUST LOOKED IT UP OH MY GOD. THERE IS SO MUCH EXTRA CONTENT WHUH.????#an hour of extras.... for every season........#ok im gonna be doing that for a while end post#army of the doomstar spoilers#aotd spoilers
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im going to McFuckin'g lose it i need to meet and hang out with queer people i can't stand being surrounded with cishet people anymore i'm going to Scream
#literally every conversation if it goes on long enough will eventually lead down to negative comments about queer people#or just shitting on cishet people for not being cishet enough 'bc you can never know these days'#im just boiling with rage in my head bc im shit at arguing bc i get too angry too fast to be able to get more rational response#or i just don't join the conversation bc i know there's no way to explain to them nicely under a minute when i'm busy with work#every time i think at least irl people i care about arent as cruel and stupid. they just say even dumber shit unprovoked#no you didn't have your brain rotten less from internet than SWJs that yell hashtag cancelled at the stupidest commercial#that nobody takes serious anyway and knows its just a bait for outrage to get their brand better known#you're just as brain broken (and worse) for seeing a person with 'bigger bones' and thinking oh she's definitely a man#a real woman doesn't look like that#or vice versa this man is too feminine to be a real man#you stupid bitch im queer do you think the same of me then?!???#im so tempted to out myself but its still a bad time to do it now that i finally have a good job#living in the middle of vukojebina doesn't help At All#just smile and wave. you're witnessing mental illness
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apparently we're going to california?? again???
#its this summer so there's still time to prep#but it would've been nice to know ahead of time :(#i might have to cancel plans now bc my mom didn't bother telling anyone before she bought tickets#don't get me wrong. going to california is fun most of the time#but i like knowing things!! i like it when my parents tell me what's happening with stuff that involves me!!!#idk how we're affording this trip either and im worried#usually my mom's family buys us tickets bc we haven't been able to afford them but that means we only go once every few years#but we just went last summer. it's been barely a year and we're already going again#how do we have the money for that?? what???#just earlier this year we were pinching pennies to afford groceries and pay the bills. but now we're going on a week-long vacation to one -#- of the most expensive states in the USA during a time where plane ticket prices are through the roof#im not gonna ask. i don't wanna know. i just really hope my mom isn't being stupid with this
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FAKING AN INTEREST
f1 grid x platonic!reader (implied landoxreader) smau
based on this request! (this may need a pt 2 honestly)
warnings: none, just men having the audacity
masterlist the playlist
⭑･ﾟﾟ･*:༅｡.｡༅:*ﾟ:*:✼✿ ✿✼:*ﾟ:༅｡.｡༅:*･ﾟﾟ･⭑
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yourusername made a new post!
liked by logansargeant, oscarpiastri, and 21,223 others
yourusername what the fuck is a DRS?
view all 9,211 comments
danielricciardo what he say fuck me for?
⤷ yourusername hi! im free may 28 if you want to hangout may 28 lmk im not doing anything may 28 please msg me if ur available may 28 so we could maybe hangout or do something may 28 !!
⤷ danielricciardo ill clear my schedule - what day did u say u were free?
⤷ username1 mad about being labelled as a fake f1 fan only to turn around and flirt with the drivers? is she fr?
⤷ yourusername get a job, touch grass?
username2 how does she know them im so confused
⤷ username3 she went to school with oscar i think?
logansargeant will you stop posting the worst pictures of me?
⤷ yourusername say please?
⤷ logansargeant please y/n im begging
⤷ yourusername start using the metric system and i'll consider it.
lilymhe come back to williams i miss u
⤷ yourusername can i bring lilyzneimer? 🥺
⤷ lilymhe omg yes!! lily-ception
⤷ oscarpiastri @/yourusername dont take my girlfriend to enemy territory tf?
⤷ logansargeant enemy? ☹️
yourusername made a new post!
liked by lilyzneimer, oscarpiastri, and 34,502 others
yourusername congrats on driving fast bestie
tagged: oscarpiastri, lilyzneimer, jensonbutton
view all 7,210 comments
username4 jenson button? what are you doing here?
⤷ yourusername forming a danica patrick hate club
⤷ yourusername we're discussing gentle parenting tactics for logan <3
⤷ logansargeant is this why jenson keeps telling me that sharing is caring??
⤷ jensonbutton in my defence i told her it wouldn't work 🤷
⤷ yourusername we'll see about that - alex_albon do you feel cared for?
⤷ alex_albon im staying out of this.
oscarpiastri thank you y/n!
⤷ yourusername so proud of u bestie
⤷ oscarpiastri i already paid for dinner you can stop pretending to be nice now
⤷ yourusername brb faking an interest in our friendship rn
⤷ username10 she's never letting that comment go fr
username7 their friendship confuses me but im so here for it
username8 oscar paid? who's shocked
⤷ username9 not me!
⤷ username10 not me!
⤷ yourusername me tbf he usually forgets his wallet
⤷ oscarpiastri i leave it on purpose, actually
⤷ yourusername gold digger 🫵
username8 she literally only goes to the races so that she can post about it on ig and pretend she knows what's going on
logansargeant you never congratulate me :(
⤷ yourusername tf u want me to congratulate u for? brushing your teeth?
⤷ logansargeant no one else will :(
username6 where did u find that picture of oscar?
⤷ yourusername wdym find? i took it loool
yourusername made a new post!
liked by logansargeant, lilymhe and 7,893 others
yourusername glorified uber drivers
tagged: logansargeant, alex_albon
view all 1,235 comments
logansargeant best biscuits ever
⤷ username5 biscuits?? that wasn't very wtf is a kilometer of you
⤷ yourusername one of us! 🇬🇧 one of us! 🇬🇧 one of us! 🇬🇧
⤷ landonorris one of us! 🇬🇧 one of us! 🇬🇧 one of us! 🇬🇧
⤷ alex_albon one of us! 🇬🇧 one of us! 🇬🇧 one of us! 🇬🇧
⤷ logansargeant oh! so this is hell!
landonorris cute! don't do it again!
⤷ yourusername i snapped the head off yours hoping it was a voodoo doll.
⤷ username3 do they hate each other or..?
⤷ yourusername yes.
⤷ landonorris cancelling our lunch plans
⤷ yourusername i was kidding pls dont im so hungry
⤷ username4 lunch plans? y'all seeing this???
username6 the picture of logan im dead
⤷ yourusername he was modelling for his cookie design
lilymhe i want the alex one
⤷ yourusername boxed it up just for u <3
⤷ yourusername alex said he'd give it to u later
⤷ alex_albon i lied. i ate it. no regrets.
yourusername made a new post!
liked by landonorris, oscarpiastri and 24,789 others
yourusername lando norris fakes an interest in the menu
tagged: landonorris, oscarpiastri
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username5 y/n out here living our dream </3
⤷ username6 god i have seen what you've done for others 🙏
⤷ yourusername lando eats chicken nuggets with a fork you can have him
⤷ landonorris this is defamation, my lawyers will be in contact.
landonorris in my defence, that place was FANCY and i wanted to pretend i wasn’t about to order chicken nuggets and chips
⤷ yourusername fancy?? oscar literally ordered a cheeseburger??
⤷ oscarpiastri dont expose me like that y/n
⤷ logansargeant one of us! 🇺🇸🦅 one of us! 🇺🇸🦅
⤷ yourusername it's not funny when u do it <3
logansargeant you never want to go to lunch with me :(
⤷ username7 logan try not to get jealous challenge - hard
⤷ yourusername i literally had brunch with you like yesterday?
⤷ logansargeant ok and?
username11 she is never gonna let that comment go is she. we get it, you know f1.
⤷ yourusername why should i?
⤷ username11 it wasnt that deep
⤷ yourusername why should i give david coulthard the platform to perpetuate negative commentary on women in motorsport?
⤷ yourusername why do we keep allowing men to talk down to women with genuine interests instead of providing them with opportunities to excel in the field?
⤷ username2 say it louder for the people in the back queen
username1 lando looks so fineeeee
⤷ yourusername too bad he sucks at chess
⤷ landonorris you cheated!
lilymhe u look so sexy let me take u out 🫢
⤷ yourusername only if ur paying 🫢
⤷ lilymhe we’ll put it on alex’s card
⤷ yourusername sounds good
⤷ alex_albon do i have a say in this?
⤷ lilymhe no.
⤷ yourusername no.
⤷ landonorris no.
⤷ oscarpiastri no.
yourusername made a new post!
liked by lilymhe, logansargeant and 31,245 others
yourusername y/n l/n fakes an interest in getting her degree 🍾🥂
tagged: ybfusername, youruniversity
view all 2,103 comments
landonorris that caption isn't even a lie 🤐
⤷ yourusername sorry cant hear you over the sound of me being a graduate
⤷ landonorris did you not literally spend the last year asking if you’d “finish this degree or if it would finish you” ??
⤷ yourusername i literally have a piece of paper that says i finished it
⤷ landonorris talk to me when you get a trophy
⤷ yourusername ok mr won one race now thinks hes the shit
⤷ username4 gagged.
landonorris but fr, congratulations y/n! proud of you always!
⤷ username4 always huh? im smelling soft launch
⤷ username9 go back to bed grandma
oscarpiastri congrats on reading and writing stuff bestie!
⤷ yourusername thanks king! <3
username6 intelligent queen we loveee
username6 suck on that david coulthard.
⤷ yourusername he better be sleeping with one eye open
⤷ username11 got a degree and now thinks she's better than a literal racing legend
⤷ yourusername dude do u like need a hug or something? if i didn't know any better id think you were in love with me
username2 shes so unserious i love her
lilyzneimer congratulations gorgeous!
⤷ yourusername congratulations to you too lil <3
⤷ username3 hot girls get degrees 🤷 i don't make the rules
⤷ lilyzneimer still cant believe the girl that used to sleep in biology graduated university
⤷ yourusername me neither tbf
⤷ oscarpiastri same.
⤷ yourusername no one asked u vroom vroom
username13 what was your dissertation on?
⤷ yourusername net-zero carbon development in race mechanisms and engineering !
⤷ username13 oh you SMART smart
⤷ landonorris debatable
logansargeant well done! does this mean no more highlighters abandoned on the floor of williams hospitality?
⤷ alex_albon please say yes 🙏
⤷ yourusername but watching you trip over them was so funny 😟
ybfusername those 3am library trips finally paid off! 🙏
⤷ yourusername jet lagged delirium and caffeine i will miss u
⤷ ybfusername im so proud of us
lilymhe graduate, baker, sexiest woman alive - is there anything you cant do?
⤷ yourusername have a genuine interest in motorsport 🤷
⤷ lilymhe wait till they find out you fake an interest in golf too 💀
⤷ yourusername im only there to see u bbygirl
yourusername made a new post!
liked by landonorris, oscarpiastri and 24,789 others
yourusername here to watch my friends drive fast cars.
tagged: lilymhe, landonorris
view all 703 comments
landonorris well, some of us drive fast cars
⤷ alex_albon what are you trying to say?
⤷ landonorris speak up a bit i cant hear you from the podium
username8 lando? yn?
⤷ username8 i feel like im interupting something
⤷ username4 can we let them just be friends and not ruin this pls
lilymhe oh we are so back
⤷ yourusername and we’re never leaving! <3
⤷ alex_albon oh god
⤷ logansargeant please no
⤷ yourusername fine, ill leave 😟
mclaren hope to see you in our garage soon y/n!
⤷ yourusername i have always looked good in papaya
⤷ username8 admin how much did lando pay u to say that?
⤷ mclaren 🤫
oscarpiastri williams take her back she keeps slapping my hat across the room
logansargeant you literally told me you're only here to get max’s autograph and sell it on ebay?
⤷ yourusername ok and?
⤷ maxverstappen1 poster or hat?
⤷ yourusername both please 🫶
⤷ maxverstappen1 bring a pen
⤷ username7 what have i just read?
⤷ maxverstappen1 im supporting y/n's financial endeavours?
#f1#formula 1#f1 grid#f1 x reader#max verstappen#lando norris#oscar piastri#f1 grid x reader#mclaren#lando norris x reader#lando norris smut#lando x reader#lando smut#lando norris imagine#lando norris fanfic#mclaren f1#lando norris fluff#propertyofwicked#f1 smau#lando norris smau#logan sargeant#logan sargeant x reader
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a list of everything ive manifested and what i want to manifest
having alot of friends + also having at least one best friend (in short never being lonely)
people always approaching me first
not living with desired people
instant appearance changes
instant weather changes
very very pretty almond doe eyes and long eyelashes
a puppy
oddly specific tiktoks to pop on my fyp
being "popular" in school
having big boobs and a big butt naturally
being a semi big submaker
my face shape (younger me listened to round shape face subliminals but i had a thin one before)
alot of mcdonalds
bigger prettier lips
alot of sps coming back because i believed in the saying "they always come back"
revising something completely and there being no evidence of it ever happening
long breaks off of school (i feel like since i was listening to ALOT of "cancel school" subliminals b4 the corona break and i've had so many breaks off of school)
soft pretty 3a/3b hair
alotttt of compliments
being seen as very attractive in my own eyes and other ppls
being alot of ppls comfort person everyone tells me they enjoy my company
being right abt random things
manifested alot of things for my old friend
constantly passing classes knowing damn well i didn't do any work 😭 went from a 34 to a 92 doing absolutely nothing
all my teachers liking me enough to bump my grades to passing even if i did nothing in their classes
strangers always being nice to me all the time
people being obsessed with me (i don't recommend manifesting this 😭)
being lucky in games
immediate weight loss
having 300+ absences when the county's limit was 10 a semester and never getting in trouble for it
moving out of houses
being spoiled by people irl and online simply for being attractive
ppl texting me immediately after i think abt them
being able to manifest fast in general
having a high pitched cute voice
+ other tiny things
what im current manifesting
being extremely rich + living in a mansion
knowing how to speak Spanish, Korean, and French
revising any trauma I've experienced
desired baby pictures and childhood memories
having no anxiety and never overthinking
being everyones type + being like kokomi teruhashi
revising that i have close childhood friends
butt length hair
having no body hair
having a vivid imagination
4.0 gpa + perfect attendance + being naturally smart + being good at math
hazel eyes with mostly green
a cat and a pink bird and a bunny + my current dogs but they're all going to be babies and get along well (also manifesting that ik how to manage all of them)
being shorter
desired parents + only one sibling
a lot of rich love interests
desired body and face
old friends coming back
being a huge submaker like roy
bringing certain family members back to life
im manifesting this by affirming and listening to subliminals because thats what i prefer
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one sentence(ish) summaries of every magnus archive episode PART 2
(eps 61-110) thank u for the funny comments and tags on the last part i love u guys
the rest of these may take a while as i've caught up to where i am currently in the podcast but i will finish them like in a month i promise
----
61. the thrilling sequel to man does not open coffin: man DOES open coffin.
62. surely this doctor can find an easier way to scam people out of money than putting them in a little book.
63. THE DARK ATE MY BROTHER IN LAW.
64. this is possibly the plot of laura croft tomb raider
65. mmm crumchy
66. what's the opposite of an unboxing video
67. as close to a coffeeshop au as you're going to get from this podcast
68. Doctors hate him! Man REFUSES to die from tuberculosis!
69. your college's psych department has the worst idea ever.
70. reverse death note
71. not even death will stop this woman from taking the british subway
72. man doesn't want to be low key racist in his last moments before getting eaten
73. police versus the second coming of dark jesus
74. lady is haunted by an ad for coffee
75. mike crew says "uh fuck it let's just put this guy on a skyscraper forever"
76. ryan from buzzfeed unsolved breaks into a train yard and suffers consequences
77. you're not a enough of a bitch to be my real mom
78. man gets harassed by his cousin and then exorcises him
79. you know that chase scene in scooby doo with the doors
youtube
80. stupid idiot motherfucking jurgen leitner
81. i have been personally victimized by the sequel to the hungry hungry caterpillar
82. pov: elias threatens to cancel you
83. mannequin takes matters into its own hands after people don't like its pitch for a new window display
84. a hoarder put newspaper on my friend's face :(
85. hey there's maybe a little man upon these stairs?
86. man gets got by a squiggly thing in the dark.
87. plumber is so oblivious to spooky happenings around him that it possibly saves his life.
88. guys i think this guy likes to dig
89. lesbian investment banker finds a new, less evil job: arson!
90. guy who turns people's bones starts a gym where he promises not to turn your bones! (he is lying)
91. i was stalked by lightning for 10 years and i all i got were these stupid scars
92. jonah magnus is a bad friend // another day another elias slay
93. ocd is no match for purple fuzz
94. let the bodies drop gently to the floor let the bodies drop gently to the floor
95. im so sorry my brain refuses to remember what the war ones were about but i think one guy got gently kissed on the forehead so that's pretty nice.
96. diversity wins! the not-quite-human delivery men who stole your identity and business are maybe gay?
97. man gets gaslighted by an entire town about a hole
98. 🎶mister sandman bring me a dream, actually don't, please stay far from me 🎶
99. another one bites the dust
100. archival assistants face off against the general public (they lose)
101. jon finally levels up high enough to unlock an eldritch horror's tragic backstory
102. LOCAL MAN MARRIES BUG
103. peppa eats a clown and they cover her in concrete instead of congratulating her.
104. pennywise stole my brother's skin
105. it's world war z baby
106. Something Big Is In Space.
107. man is interrogated about the time he saw thomas the train roasts people alive and also sans is there
108. actor is stalked by mask who liked his monologue so much that it tells its mask friends to come watch.
109. sometimes a family is just a serial killer's daughter and that guy who maybe killed some vampires
110. yeah man those spiders be eating
Part 1 |
#tma#i hope this convinces you to listen to tma#the magnus archives#sasha james#jon sims#podcasts#gay podcasts#elias bouchard#peter lukas#melanie king#gerard keay#jonathan sims#martin blackwood#jonmartin#funny#one sentence summaries#sillyposting#Youtube#queer
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Can I req bofurin boys on a first date? Thank you and have a nice day
first date with him . wind breaker
first date headcanons
featuring : kiryu mitsuki, sakura haruka, taiga tsugeura
cw : none, just pure fluff!
a/n : so sorry for being late to this ask i've been very busy these past few days but im trying my best to finish this all. and i really like this idea so i might make a part 2 :3 and have a nice day too!
DONT TRANSLATE MY WORK!
SAKURA HARUKA
- he actually doesn't know what to do
- was about to give up and told you that the plan was cancelled until nirei slapped him on the shoulder(nirei got slapped back)
- decided to get advices from kaji
- kaji also doesn't know and told him to leave him alone, but he also told sakura to atleast bring something with him to give to you
- he ended up bringing you to cafe pothos since he couldn't think of any other place
"...s-sorry..it's not much." you heard him mutter something but can't quite make out what it is, so you asked him to repeat it once again which makes his face goes bright red. "i- i don't know what you're talking about! i didn't say anything!"
- after spending time in the cafe and eating both your meals, he finally brings out the gift that he prepared for you
- kotoha won't stop sending him side eyes and a teasing smile which makes sakura unable to utter a word
- he just shoves it in your face(gently)
"h-here..take this." he says nervously while averting his gaze from yours. sakura took a long time picking out gifts for you and now he doesn't know if you'll like it or not. you opened the bag and found a bread. "a bread?" "just take it!"
KIRYU MITSUKI
- he wants to take you to an arcade but he thinks it's a bit too much for a first date, so he'd probably took you to a famous cafe in town
- he'll also come pick you up from your home
- when you walked out of your home, he took your hand in his and compliments your outfit
- he won't stop talking of how pretty you look that day, even after you're finished with the date he'd still bring it up each time you met.
"you look so pretty," he smiled at you as he took your hand in his, "lucky me for being able to date you." his words makes you flustered.
- when you arrived at the cafe, you'd think that he would be on his phone all the time since it's all that he does, but he actually put it in his pocket for today.
- if you're too anxious to order food, he's gonna order it for you
- would pay for the food
"is it really okay?" you look at the bills on the table, then look at him again with furrowed brows. "yeah, of course it's okay." he took your hand in his again and smiled at you.
TAIGA TSUGEURA
- you'll definitely know where he's taking you
- he told his friends that he's going to take you to a gym as a first date so you both could spend time together while also do workouts
- his friends obviously told him it's a stupid plan and told him to take you to a restaurant instead
- he probably took you to that one place(if you know what im talking about)
- he will apologize the whole time if the place isn't to your liking
"i'm sorry if this place doesn't look too fancy," he put his hands together and lowered his head, "but i promise you this place has great food! i come here regularly!" you smiled at him and tell him that it's okay as long as you're spending time with him. he's now pretty flustered and also proud of himself.
- you noticed that most of the food has the word 'energy' in it, you don't understand but you still order whatever you like.
- he of course ask you his infamous question, and you answered. the fact that you actually answered the question makes him very happy.
- after you both finished your meals, he takes you home.
"thank you for today." you smiled at him warmly and said that you had fun, you also complimented him. about how his loud and cheerful personality also makes you feel happy. hearing those words from someone he loves makes his heart melt. he can only mutter out a little thank you because a tear started to form in the corner of his eyes.
naomi-nana. do NOT repost, do not use,(with or without permission), do not reccommend or talk about my works outside of tumblr. DONT TRANSLATE MY WORK!
#nao.writes#wind breaker#wind breaker (satoru nii)#wind breaker fanfic#wind breaker x reader#wind breaker x you#wind breaker headcanons#sakura haruka#sakura haruka x yn#sakura haruka x reader#sakura haruka x you#kiryu mitsuki#kiryu mitsuki x reader#kiryu mitsuki x you#taiga tsugeura#taiga tsugeura x reader#taiga tsugeura x you#taiga tsugeura x yn#fanfic#writers on tumblr
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so close (yet so far)
[Alhaitham x Reader]
You ask Alhaitham to be friends with benefits with you. (The both of you overestimate your ability to not get your feelings involved.)
word count: 11k* (one-shot)
notes: heavily nsfw**, female reader; "you", inexperienced!reader, friends to fwb to lovers, unrequited to mutual pining, modern au (reader and alhaitham went to hs together), some profanity, brief body insecurity on reader's side
*split into three main parts: one part is Alhaitham's POV btw a speed demon possessed me to write this much (im kidding; my friend put brain worms in me)
**oral sex, brief descriptions of face fucking, 69, car sex, dirty talk, face sitting, thigh fucking
.
.
.
Dating apps vary in tone and quality, you find out firsthand. Certain ones call for one-night stands and hook ups and others are prone to less of them (but they will always be there). You don't feel like you can make genuine relationships with people without meeting them first, but you figure you should give it a chance at least before giving up.
You are close to doing so when you show up for a date, and he cancels last minute.
"Ugh, man..." You sigh, putting your phone away after seeing the apologetic text. You won't blame your date: it may as well be a real emergency, but if not, he is not beholden to you to show up, though it would have been nice on his end to let you know earlier.
Still, you are here, and you are hungry, so you step into the cafe in hopes of grabbing fresh pastries when a familiar face catches your eye. You almost don't believe it, considering how many years have passed since you've last seen him. But there is no mistaking the silvery hair and the nose still buried in a book; even the green headphones remain the same, a detail that makes you laugh a little when you approach him and hope he isn't too upset at the sudden reunion.
"Alhaitham," you say cheerily, waving at him in case his noise-canceling is on. "It's been a while!"
Alhaitham takes his eyes off his book to look at you, hands raised to take off his headphones. You grin when it seems that he is just as surprised to see you as you are. "It has," he agrees. "More than a few years." He takes a look at you. "You haven't changed a bit."
"How rude!" You say teasingly, "I've changed a little bit in the past few years. Maybe not in appearance, but still. Mind if I sit?"
Alhaitham moves over when you take a chair over to sit in front of him, and it feels like the two of you never left high school-- if not for the stark fact that Alhaitham has changed physically since then. His jaw is more defined, shoulders broader, probably even taller than he was back then. He's handsome, you think, though then again, he always has been.
Wistfully, you think about the years you've lost connection with him and wonder what he has been up to. You've always enjoyed his company, much to some of your other friends' chagrin, and that sentiment has not changed now when the two of you converse easily.
"So," Alhaitham says, "were you on a date with someone?"
You don't even bother asking how he knew, only sighing and waving a hand. "I was going to be. He canceled last minute so I was going to grab something and go." Alhaitham hums noncommittally, and you snort in laughter, reminded of his apathy towards relationships then and, you guess, now.
You remember the times Alhaitham turned down people in high school at a ridiculous rate. "Another one?" You remember someone saying jokingly, seeing Alhaitham simply toss a letter slipped into his locker.
"You won't respond at least?" You asked, sympathetic over the courage it took to confess.
"I don't know them," you recall him saying. "Why should I consider being in a relationship with them when we haven't even spoken to gauge our compatibility?"
Alhaitham ended up not accepting anyone's confessions. You don't remember him dating in high school or during university either in the times you've messaged him just to catch up. Not that you have a stellar record either, having dated only one person your whole life without it going very far. You can't say you haven't tried though.
"So you're not dating anyone?" You ask, taking a sip of your drink.
Alhaitham looks at you briefly; you can never tell what he's thinking. He eventually looks away and says, "No. I'm not interested in dating."
"At all?" You ask again, voice high in genuine disbelief. 'Still?' is the unspoken question. (What a shame, you can't help but think.) When Alhaitham gives a nonchalant shrug, you let yourself sit back, astonished. You think about your (lack of) experience, the fatigue from dating apps, and then look at Alhaitham.
You've always found him attractive; you can't deny this. You trust him as a friend and as a confidant, because in his own words-- what is the use of telling secrets? Alhaitham is as intelligent and rational as ever, something you have always admired in him, which is why you trust him with this question.
"Would you be down for a friends with benefits relationship then?"
Alhaitham raises his brow in question and pauses in thought before responding. "...In general?" He asks, "Or with you?"
You love the way Alhaitham needs no explanation.
"Both," you reply. "Serious inquiry."
Worst case scenario Alhaitham rejects the offer and the two of you move on from this conversation (hopefully). Best case scenario is him saying yes. Last thing you expect is to have Alhaitham look at you with an expression you’ve never seen on him: unadulterated shock. You laugh at his reaction despite the tension that could have been held between the two of you, and you start to wave off the entire ordeal when Alhaitham tells you "sure."
.
It's only Alhaitham, but you show up at his apartment with a nervous flutter in your heart. He opens the door soon after you knock, donned in a regular shirt and sweatpants. You feel your shoulders relax at the casualness of it all and thank him for his hospitality as you enter his home. It does not take much to strike a normal conversation with him, words between the two of you flowing like usual. You are given a tour of the apartment per request, briefly admiring the tiles of the bathroom floor before ending the route in his room. It is minimalistic aside from the usual amenities, and it feels so much like Alhaitham that you smile as he types something on his laptop before turning back to you.
"Is my room that amusing to you?" Alhaitham scoffs, closing his laptop.
"Yeah, it kind of is," you agree easily. "It's better than a man cave, I'll give you that. But the walls are as empty as the day you got this place probably."
"I'll be sure to let you know when inspiration hits for me to decorate," he says sardonically, making you giggle to yourself. "Did you want music?"
The sudden change in topic makes you tilt your head in confusion. "Music?" You echo. "Music for what?"
Without skipping a beat, a song starts playing on low volume, bass steady and clear in his speakers. Alhaitham stands tall then, his headphones off, you note vaguely. He seems a lot taller than you remember, but perhaps it is because he is usually conscious of the difference in height to stand at a distance, so you don't have to crane your neck. This time, when Alhaitham stands right in front of you, close enough to bump chests, you look up and realize it is the first time you've really looked into Alhaitham's eyes.
There are more colors than you thought.
You instinctively want to take a step back, but his hand holding your arm-- firmly, just enough to stop you, but not strong enough to keep you there if you wanted to leave-- keeps you underneath his gaze. You are normally so good at defusing the tension with a few well-placed words of humor, but you aren't quite sure this is a tension that you want to cut through.
Just like that, your heart is at your throat. Alhaitham truly is very handsome, you think, eyes looking at his long lashes, the curve of his nose, and his lips. You can't help but jump when Alhaitham leans down, face closest to yours as it has ever been. You feel ridiculous, being strung taut as a caught fishing line just from being close to Alhaitham. Your cheeks prickle with the speed in which it warms, and just when you begin to wonder what Alhaitham could possibly be waiting for before he kisses you, his lips are on yours.
Your eyes close almost immediately, arms reaching up to hold onto him and finding purchase around his neck as he pulls you close until the two of you are flushed against each other. How long has it been since you've been kissed, let alone been kissed like this? Lips separating from yours only enough to find new ways to kiss you again. You gasp when Alhaitham gently bites and pulls at your lower lips. Feeling emboldened by your reception, Alhaitham swoops in and meets his tongue with yours, and you melt in his embrace.
You are surprised to see that you could probably go on kissing Alhaitham forever if that was all you could do. You only vaguely realize how efficiently you've been breathing through your nose through it all when you separate from him, dazed, and hear him mutter "fuck" under his breath.
A rush of adrenaline. You were already aware that Alhaitham is a willing participant in this newly established situationship, but to hear him being as affected as you do numbers to your rapidly increasing arousal. It's only fun when the both of you are enjoying it, after all.
"Not bad from someone who hasn't smooched anyone in years, huh?" You begin to tease, rightfully earning yourself a dirty look from Alhaitham. His lips are still wet, you think, and heat curls up from your lower abdomen up. The room suddenly feels hot.
"Are we trying to rate every encounter now?" Alhaitham remarks dryly, only to make you laugh at the thought of it.
"Not if it's not at least a 7/10," you say breathlessly. You shake in laughter again when you see him roll his eyes before holding onto his hand and tugging him to the couch. "Here, sit. My neck is starting to get tired. Being shorter is a struggle, you know."
Alhaitham sighs but sits obediently where you take him. "What do you-" He snaps his mouth shut when you swing your legs over his lap and sit yourself on top of him. You quirk a smile at the rare sight of Alhaitham being stunned once again and wonder how easily it seems to have gotten to make him react like that.
His hand easily finds its place at your waist as you curl your hands into the hair at the nape. "Trying to make myself comfortable," you say slyly. "This is much better."
You close the distance and kiss him again. You're a quick learner, so you do what has been done to you: nipping at his lips, tugging and pulling, and licking into his mouth until it makes him as breathless as you are. Is this what it's like to have chemistry? You wonder, feeling Alhaitham's hands dip underneath your top to slide his hand across the expanse of your naked skin. You want him to touch you more.
Alhaitham must have the same ideas because he murmurs at you to take it off, and you raise your arms easily to let him do exactly that. His fingers waste no time in pressing into the softness of your breast, over the white cloth of your bra. He is quick to grow tired of the thin barrier though, pulling it down just so your breasts can pop out into full view. Your cheeks prick in embarrassment at how exposed you feel-- this is the first man to see you like this, after all-- and having Alhaitham look at you with intense focus does not help with it.
Alhaitham's hands are warm when they cup your breasts, gently squeezing them until your nipples perk against his long fingers. You gasp in pleasure when he pinches them and tugs. Your arms reach out and hold onto his shoulders for support. As though on cue, Alhaitham swoops down to capture one of your nubs in his mouth while his hand plays idly with the other. He swirls it with his tongue, leaving a trail of spit when he detaches himself from it to move onto the other one. You hum as your hands card through his hair.
Alhaitham's free hand unhooks your bra, leaving it to hang down your shoulders. You immediately tug it completely off, casting it carelessly elsewhere. He is quick to be on you again, encouraging you to wrap your arms around him as he sucks onto your tits. It feels rather uneven, the way you're half-dressed but he's still fully clothed. You can feel the way his muscles contract underneath your hands, fingers tracing along the exposed skin of his neck that is far from being enough for you.
Just as you decide to ask Alhaitham to return the favor and take his clothes off, your hands spasms in his hair when Alhaitham takes a nipple between his teeth and tugs, hard.
Oh fuck, you think, letting out a long, shaky breath just before Alhaitham does it again, his hands on your back as it arches at his touch. "Fuck," you say aloud this time, and you can feel the way Alhaitham's lips curve up in amusement, the bastard. "Hey, you take your clothes off too," you tell him, tugging up the hem of his shirt.
Alhaitham looks at you steadily. "Why?"
You stare back at him and sputter. "What do you mean 'why?'" You-" You scowl, feeling your cheeks warm as Alhaitham continues to look at you with a smirk. "You just want me to say it, don't you?"
"I'm not a mind reader," he says, lips curving up. "How would I know what you want if you don't tell me?"
"I want to see you," you say, cheeks prickling with an embarrassment that you push through. "I want to touch you too, you know." When Alhaitham smirks at you before sitting up from the couch to take his shirt off, you huff. "Ugh, this is why everyone keeps giving you side eyes," you say, your hands sliding over his open chest with a mild sense of reverence despite your words. You knew Alhaitham was toned to hell, and this is the first time you've been granted the chance to view it in all its glory, your hands brushing over his built abdomen, thumb brushing over his nipples.
Alhaitham jumps slightly when you do so, and you giggle, ignoring the narrowed look you get from him and the way he grips onto your hips just the slightest. You shift in your seat, only to feel Alhaitham's hold you still, face flushed despite the impartial expression on his face. "What, what's up-" You feel it then, the hardness underneath your thighs, and you know Alhaitham sees the realization dawn on you because his blush travels down his neck.
He's embarrassed, you think gleefully. After initiating the hottest make out session you've ever had and easily pulling taut your strings, Alhaitham is embarrassed that he's hard? If anything, he should be-- better be! And you're a little flattered, you tell him just as much teasingly, and you can't help but hug him when he scowls at you.
Ah, you feel your heart flutter, knowing the effect you have on the immovable Alhaitham. But he is far from it now, chest heaving under your palm, cock hard as you press down onto it despite his modest resistance. You won't say it to him out loud, knowing he wouldn't like it, but you think Alhaitham is adorable as he is now. (You imagine people would say you're the only one who would think that.)
You rock your hips, eyes not straying from Alhaitham's as he stubbornly meets your gaze. His thighs are tense underneath you as you line yourself up to press your pussy lips against his clothed cock. A skirt was a good choice, you think dreamily; it lets you grind on him with aching accuracy and lets Alhaitham slide his hands across your legs and reach behind to squeeze your ass. You hum again in appreciation, kissing Alhaitham again as he generously cups your behind, making you moan, which he easily swallows up.
"Take your pants off too," you say, sitting back onto his legs. Before he can ask, you press your palm down on his bulge and quip a smile at him. "I want to try sucking you off."
.
You tie your hair up before kneeling down between Alhaitham's knees. His cock sits erect on his stomach, head flush with arousal. It should feel intimidating the way Alhaitham watches you, but you know Alhaitham, and you figure if there is anyone that you can be comfortable doing this with, it would be him.
"Tell me what to do," you say, hands softly trailing up and down his thighs. "I've never done this before."
"You've watched porn, haven't you?" Alhaitham replies dryly, making you roll your eyes good naturedly.
"It's not the same thing as doing, and you know it." You look over at the nearby table he has kindly set up for you in advance and take the bottle of lotion to pour some onto your hand. Alhaitham jolts slightly at the coldness of the lotion, hissing in a breath, though with the way you are steadily pumping his cock, you aren't quite certain the sound wasn't at least partially from pleasure. "Alhaitham," you begin, a whining lilt to your voice. "Come on. Teach me?"
"Alright, alright, fine," Alhaitham says, his hand covering his face. "Just- just stop for a second."
You let go of his cock, beaming up at him as he shifts so that he's sitting more comfortably. "Here," he says, almost boredly. He gestures for you to take him in hand again, and your heart skips when you feel his hand over yours, squeezing it as he guides it up and down again in a steady rhythm. "Tighten your grip like this. A little harder is fine. There are more nerve endings at the tip, but there's nothing wrong with covering the base as well." You can only nod in acknowledgement, a lump in the back of your throat as you emulate exactly what Alhaitham has shown you.
Is this how he normally gets himself off? The same strength, the same motion-- maybe a little extra attention at the tip where it is more sensitive? You feel your face warm and hope it does not show as you watch Alhaitham's face for approval or for any signs of pleasure.
Alhaitham has always been intense despite his neutral face. But you know him well enough to recognize the minute changes that occur. The tense jaw, partially open mouth, half-lidded gaze is enough to light a fire in your stomach. But you wonder how he would look if he were completely drowned in pleasure, if you could be the one that makes him look like that.
You speak before you can lose the courage to. "Can I use my mouth?" You say, "I want to use my mouth."
Alhaitham's cock twitches in your hand.
"Then put it in your mouth then," Alhaitham says, "and avoid teeth. It hurts."
Obediently, you nod and sit up on your knees, puppy licking the tip to test the waters before opening your mouth to put it in. You had thought this when your hand could not completely wrap around his cock, but Alhaitham is big, enough to make your jaw ache when you try to fit more of his member in. You make a sound of discontent when the cock head hits the back of your throat and you aren't even halfway down. You let your tongue rest on the bottom of his cock, saliva pooling underneath with a mouth so full.
It doesn't fit, you think somewhat dejectedly. You swallow around his cock, making a discontented noise when you feel Alhaitham's thigh clench as he bucks up into your mouth. "Sorry," he says, and you tell him an incomprehensible 'it's okay' around his cock. His thigh tenses up again.
You tentatively raise your head, lips wrapped around his member for a moment before pulling yourself off, ready to ask for guidance when Alhaitham offers it to you. "You can use your hand to cover the rest of it," he says. "A wringing motion like this. It'll feel better if you suck while you're doing it too. Use lotion or spit if it's too dry."
You nod and follow his words step by step, swallowing his cock again and hollowing your cheeks. The other hand pumps his cock as you slowly bob your head up and down. You lift yourself up with a breath and let saliva spill from your lips to ease the motion, your eyes glancing up to meet Alhaitham's eyes.
You don't think he has taken his eyes off of you for even a second.
It's a little addicting to know that his attention is all yours. What does he like best about this whole situation, you muse. The fact that he's your first? The eager way in which you are trying to please him? Or is it the look of you drooling over his cock, getting off just from sucking it?
You hum in pleasure around his cock and he throws his head back, hips jilting up only slightly.
You pop yourself off of him again, hand pumping the entire expanse of his cock as you tilt your head to lick at his balls. "Fuck," Alhaitham mutters, hands clenched into the couch. You watch as his eyes flutter open before looking at you again, chest rising and falling. Not one to give neither you nor him reprieve, you are sucking him off again, and then off, and then on. It's a little fun watching him writhe, and you slowly begin to realize the power you seem to have over him.
You are so grateful to Alhaitham for saying 'yes.' The feeling of being wanted, of being desired, of being empowered is intoxicating. Watching Alhaitham fall apart before your eyes because of you is even more so.
He says your name, strained, "I'm close."
Alhaitham lets out an involuntary groan when you pop off again. "Does cum taste bad?" You ask. "It's a lot neater if I swallow, unless you want it somewhere else?" The thought of Alhaitham finishing on your chest or face is somewhat appealing, though you worry about the mess.
It doesn't seem like Alhaitham particularly cares, because he grits out, "Your choice." He muffles a grunt of pleasure that you wish you could hear at full volume. "Just-"
The key to success is consistency, you think. You bob your head up and down in tandem with your hand, licking the head and swirling your tongue around his shaft until Alhaitham lets out a strained, "I'm coming-"
Despite the warning, the warmth that spurts in your mouth is still surprising. You slow your pace as Alhaitham cums, all pretty gasps and grunts that makes your head spin as you take all he is giving and swallowing. It's a lot more than you think too, your hand daintily at your mouth as you swallow as though it were the last bite of a meal. You look at Alhaitham, skin glistening with sweat, breathing hard after his climax, eyes slightly wide as he watches you lick your lips.
Before you can ask for it, Alhaitham shifts just enough to reach for a towel-- he really is prepared for everything-- for you to wipe your hand with. You hear him let out a long breath before you return the towel to him for his own uses. You stand up, wincing at the marks on your knees from kneeling for so long before grinning at him.
"So, what's the verdict?" You ask jokingly, making him scoff and roll his eyes as you had predicted.
"I'm not answering that," he says. He stands up and picks his sweatpants from the ground to make himself more modest. "You can extrapolate for that type of answer yourself."
You expected as much, but you still pout and sigh. You sit on the couch next to him. "Aw, boo, well I guess I'll just give myself an 8/10 then." You stop when you feel Alhaitham's gaze on you, calculating. "What, what is it? Am I lowballing it or what-"
"I think it's your turn," Alhaitham says simply.
"Oh, uh..." You honestly didn't come to his house expecting anything, so this comes as a surprise to you. That and a few certain parts of you makes that bit of insecurity flare up the moment Alhaitham mentions reciprocation. "It's fine," you say, "we don't have to-" You snap your mouth shut when Alhaitham parts your legs to put his knees between, his hand lifting your chin so he can kiss you. You vaguely think about the fact that he can probably taste himself on your tongue.
"I insist," Alhaitham murmurs against your lips.
"What do you suggest then?" You stammer, and Alhaitham pushes himself off just enough to look at you directly.
"We could try fingering. See if that's to your taste and then move on." He gauges you carefully. "We could stop if you truly wanted to, but don't make that decision on my behalf."
"Well, we could try," you say, lowering your gaze, feeling your heart pick up in anticipation.
"Alright," Alhaitham replies softly. "You can stop me at any time."
This is why you trust Alhaitham. This is why you asked Alhaitham to do this with you, to-- for a lack of better, less dramatic phrases-- be your first. It was made as a casual request but Alhaitham knew to take it seriously for you anyways. You aren't sure how much he knows how his words make you feel at ease.
The sense of ease is immediately replaced with nervous anticipation when Alhaitham parts your legs, pooling your skirt at your stomach, and slips his hand underneath your panties. You hear him let out a sharp breath, and before you can ask what's wrong, he says, almost in awe, "You're so wet."
You understand Alhaitham's feelings earlier now when you had felt his bulge; your arousal on full blast is nothing short of mortifying even though the situation calls for it. You hadn't even noticed, so focused on the task at hand, but when Alhaitham pulls back with glistening lines of slick between his fingers, you don't doubt his observation.
"W-Well, you know," you mumble, your hand grasping onto his supporting arm. Your eyes flutter when Alhaitham cups your sex, fingers sliding a line down the middle. Your hand spasms when his thumb hits your clit on the way down, and Alhaitham does not miss it. "Wait, Alhaitham-" You squeal when he presses onto your clit, swirling around it with persistent pressure that makes it hard to say anything coherent. You wouldn't have wanted to tell him to stop anyways, but you have a feeling he just wanted to tease you.
"Sensitive?" He says almost smugly.
"Not usually no," you choke out, breathing out a sigh of relief when Alhaitham lets off.
"Interesting," he says, and it's only now you realize how quiet Alhaitham was before when you were on your knees. Now with him at the upper hand, he can speak all he wants, and you're the one left catching your breath. It really is different when it's someone else doing it. "I'm putting one in to start, okay?"
You nod, but when you feel the first intrusion prod in, you reach out to seek out Alhaitham for support. "Relax," he tells you. "Your muscles are too tense for anything."
"Sorry," you say, taking a deep breath. He pulls you closer, allowing you to rest your head on his shoulder. You hot breath hits his neck when you turn to him. "Make sure you really lube that up, Haitham." You breathe again when his finger enters, and when it curls up onto the spongey part of your cunt, you feel it. It's nothing of import yet, but Alhaitham seems patient enough to build up to it.
One finger barely fits, but even with time, the second finger enters too. "You're tight," Alhaitham grunts, and you feel yourself redden as your only response. "I think you're stretched out. Any pain?" When you shake your head on his shoulders, you feel his fingers slowly pump in and out of you.
It picks up in pace and intensity, and then when he curves up this time- oh, you aren't sure you've ever felt this sensation before. Alhaitham's fingers are so much longer than yours, so it makes sense he can reach the places you can't, knuckles deep in you. Your breathing quickens and with it, Alhaitham's speed, his fingers pounding at that same spot over and over. You're at a daze, not any closer to a climax but not bored without pleasure. You aren't sure how long Alhaitham goes at it until he slows down, and the fog clears up.
"You okay?"
You hum, turning your head to face Alhaitham when he peers over to you. "Yeah," you mumble, "I feel good, just can't come from this."
"Hm."
You miss Alhaitham's warmth when he pulls away, fingers grasping at him. The haze that you feel quickly blows away when Alhaitham gets on his knees and pries your legs apart. "Whoa, um-"
"Most cannot finish with vaginal stimulation alone," Alhaitham says factually. "Hence, I'll be focusing my efforts on other areas."
"Yeah, I get that," you say, blinking with embarrassment. "It's just, um..."
Without your understanding, Alhaitham gives you a deeply unimpressed look. "Hair is a natural phenomenon. It doesn't matter to me in the slightest."
You would find it hard to believe, an insecure part of you convinced that it must be polite niceties. But this is Alhaitham, and he is never one for false platitudes and social norms with strangers or friends or you. When he says he does not care, you believe him.
"If you're sure," you tell him, and you let out a small squeak when he tugs your panties down, not even bothering to take it off completely before you feel his fingers pry your leaking lips apart. A lick up your clit has your legs closing on his head, but Alhaitham's hands easily pry you apart and keep you that way, your pussy open to be eaten.
You want to look away when Alhaitham's meets your eyes, and then his lips press to your folds and he begins to gorge himself on you.
It's impossible to keep your eyes open then when you're too distracted by how Alhaitham's tongue swirls around your clit, the muscle pressing into the bud of nerves with a dogged persistence. Even the noises you have kept to a minimum spill from your lips involuntarily. You can only breathe in hiccups, Alhaitham relentless in his pursuit of your climax as he sucks on your clit and begins to press his fingers against the zone of pleasure inside you as well.
'It feels good' sounds like an understatement at this point. You climb the precipice at an alarming speed, and you cannot help but grasp onto the hand keeping your thighs apart to ground yourself. It's almost overwhelming, but then you feel Alhaitham unfurl his grip onto your leg to grasp onto your hand.
It must be the endorphins, but you feel a warm ooze of affection for Alhaitham pool in your chest.
Logical, calm, and reasonable Alhaitham. Arrogant, antisocial, abrasive Alhaitham. Observant, considerate, and kind Alhaitham. You've known this man for so many years, and you are reminded in this instance that in all the times you have trusted him, he has never failed you once.
"Alhaitham-" You cry out. Your head feels hot as you curl your toes, your heels at his shoulders. When he hums in response, you feel the build up towards the beginning of the end. "I'm- I'm coming-"
You throw your head back, gasping in pleasure as your body jerks with waves of pleasure. Hazily, you feel Alhaitham lap at your hole at a slow but steady pace, his mouth never leaving you even as you buck against him.
Alhaitham only lets you go when your body slackens, legs limp in his arm as he gently sets it down in a comfortable position for you. You watch him, dazed, as he quietly grabs the towel to wipe his face and hands. He must see you look because he turns to you and offers you the towel too, though the mess between your legs is one of the last things you care about at the moment.
"C'mere," you say, arms reaching out for him. When he doesn't immediately come to you, you wave your hands insistently. "Plea-a-ase come here? I wanna cuddle."
A flicker of emotion comes and goes on Alhaitham's face before he replaces it with exasperation. "I didn't realize the benefits portion of friends with benefits included cuddles," he says, but he walks to you anyways, huffing in laughter at the small 'yay!' from you. Alhaitham settles in the space you moved over for him on the couch, and you immediately latch yourself onto him, head fitting easily at the crook of his neck. As his arms wrap around you, you heave a content sigh.
"You should have read the fine print, Alhaitham," you drawl, cheek pressed against his naked skin. "It was right there on page 562, 9th clause, addendum number four." You close your eyes, smiling at the sound of Alhaitham's little huff.
"Out of the two of us, I'm the one more likely to read a written agreement in full," he says. His voice reverberates in your ears, low and comforting.
You always thought he had a nice voice, reading out texts in class and reciting lines without effort. The two of you are a long way off from high school, but thinking back at the Alhaitham back then brings you good memories. It's even more so when you compare it to the Alhaitham now of whom reconnecting with was happenstance.
Alhaitham has changed a little in the years you have not seen him, with what you know now includes a fallout with Kaveh and an early college graduation. He's a little softer, you think, edges more blunt but still just as deadly when wielded with a sharp wit. It is to your comfort that most parts of him remain the same. A little smug, a little snark.
You're glad; you've always liked him just the way he is.
You feel his hand absently rub circles into your shoulders and feel as though that sentiment has only grown stronger.
"...You're hard again?" You ask after a moment, muffling your laughter into his skin when he clicks his tongue and shifts his legs so the offending body part in question is no longer touching you.
"A normal physical reaction," Alhaitham says, miffed.
You pause. "You want me to do it again?" You ask.
Alhaitham shifts so he can look down at you as you give him a grin, reaching down to grasp at his shaft and watching that moment when you catch him off guard, eyes fluttering in pleasure. Oh, yes, you think, heat pooling into your abdomen, you can certainly go for another round.
.
.
.
You tell him that you are tired of dating around with men you have no connection with, afraid to build intimacy when you are still inexperienced, and trust him enough to put up the offer to be friends with benefits. Alhaitham knows he is in love with you, but he says yes anyways. He does not make miscalculations often, but he acknowledges that he is only human, so he is prone to them occasionally. He thinks this decision to be friends with benefits with you may be one of them.
He has always had a hard time featuring his own feelings in the equation, surprisingly volatile in its unchanging affection for you even after all these years. (How long has it been since high school?) Anyone with a brain not controlled by their libido knows entering a purely sexual relationship with someone you’ve never quite stopped having feelings for is a recipe for disaster. But just maybe, being aware of that much will let Alhaitham avoid ruin.
It doesn't stop the way something in his chest twists painfully at the thought of holding you close even though you could not be more further away. After all, in initiating this relationship with him, you must have seen him as only a friend. You seem excited at the prospect of starting this type of relationship with him, and he is not one to deny you something if he believes it is something in his power to give.
On that note, he is surprised when he hears you have no experience being in a physical relationship with a man. Alhaitham does admit the idea of being your 'first' appeals to him, and because of that he thinks maybe he isn't so infallible to the whims of desire.
He's liked you for ages. He isn't sure even the best of men can refuse when the object of his affection asks him to treat them gently. (Or so he thinks. You may be more of his weak spot than he ever anticipated.)
You show up on his doorstep a week later, beaming at him when he lets you into his apartment. In the days leading up to this meeting, Alhaitham has prepped the environment with necessary amenities. You didn't specify what was to happen today, so he prepares everything to the lube to the condoms to the towels. Music, too, is something he did extensive research in, having learned that it can often set the mood.
Alhaitham isn't necessarily the most experienced person, but for the sake of knowing, he has slept with people and learned about his own preferences. He is more curious than he admits to finding out more about your preferences.
Still, when you look up at him doe-eyed and cheeks warm in anticipation, he is taken aback by the idea that he'll be the one to guide you today. He remembers when you were the one to direct him to class when he was lost as a transfer sophomore in high school. You were so assure of yourself, confident-- he never would have anticipated that you would have a shy side to you.
Perhaps that is what makes it all the more endearing, you all the more desirable, his chest searing with want as he closes the gap to finally feel your lips on his.
He really likes you, he's reminded, heart beating hard in his chest he thinks you might be able to hear it. And though you do not kiss him with the same feelings he holds for you, when you look up at him like that, he can almost imagine that you do.
Lips are one of the erogenous zones outside of sexual organs, filled with sensitive nerves that can sense even the slightest difference in temperature. The auditory sense is powerful too when it comes to stimulating the libido. It's why Alhaitham wants to devour you when he hears your small gasps as he pulls at your lips.
"Come sit," you murmur to him, and he can only acquiesce without a word. Good thing, because he would have been made speechless the way you boldly swing your legs over to sit on his lap. Alhaitham is acutely aware that his cock has begun to fill, straining against sweatpants that shows no effort to hide his arousal.
Your kisses sear his lips, your hands welcoming his to explore your body which he does with little hesitation. Alhaitham wants to see you in full, your breasts spilling out and nipples hard being irresistible that he cannot do anything but put his mouth to use again.
Your skin is smooth against his palm, your sounds of pleasure almost like music to his ears he almost wishes it weren't buffeted by the sensual base notes of a playlist he searched up last night. "I want to touch you too," you tell him breathlessly, and who is he to deny you that?
When you take a moment to admire his body, he takes this moment to look at you-- an overview, one might say. You are breathtaking in his perspective, lips slightly swollen, breasts bouncing when you adjust yourself. Alhaitham feels his cheeks warm when you innocuously grind yourself onto him (that damned skirt), and he only grows hotter when you do it again with purpose.
He should have known you would be able to flip the tables on him like that, inexperience be damned. You've always had a way to do that.
And then you are on your knees, hair up and ready to pleasure him, and he almost doesn't know what to do. Except he must-- you want him to guide you, to teach you how to make him feel good, and the way you easily do that forces him to do his best not to buck up into your touch. He must be more sensitive because it's you, or maybe you really are that fast of a learner, even when it comes to sucking cock.
Would you like dirty talk? He wonders, praise or degradation? You seem to like it a little rough, though you seem receptive to his gentleness too. Not that he can think it thoroughly with the way you are hallowing your cheeks, tongue swirling around his cock. Seeing you swallow his cum-- all of it-- is almost enough to revive his softening member, the way you look at him coyly an attractive look on your face.
He thinks the way your face contorts in pleasure is also an attractive look for him too. Alhaitham looks up from his position between your legs and watches you with hazy desire as you close your eyes, hand at your mouth to muffle your gasps. Alhaitham thinks of telling you to stop covering yourself, but he thinks that just this one time, his mouth has better things to do.
His name on your lips as you reach your high makes him close his eyes and hum in pleasure, tongue delving into you again as your slick gushes from your hole. Alhaitham is a man of pride, and watching your body slacken, spent on pleasure that he wrought from you makes his chest burn with satisfaction.
He wipes himself and sees you look up at him almost sleepily, and the satisfaction quickly morphs into gentle affection. He wants to kiss your forehead, clean you up himself and hold you. But is that too revealing? Too much emotion for a relationship like this? And Alhaitham is brought back to the reality that you are only his friends with benefits. (He is well aware of the concept of 'post-nut clarity' but finds it loathsome at the moment.)
Just as he begins to formulate words to wrap this scene in a pretty bow, you wave him over with an endearingly whining croon, and he comes to you without thinking otherwise. He is yours to hold-- always has been.
Alhaitham cannot control how you feel (would never want to), but he can control the way he will not fall apart even as you lay down with him, tracing shapes into his hand in a way he's never allowed himself to dream of. So close yet so far, he thinks, trying not to smile when you whinge at him at pushing you off the couch until you go to the bathroom. He'll take care of you as long as you'll have him.
.
.
.
You go over to Alhaitham's when you can. You try not to treat him like a booty call--though, as he has told you before, that is simply the nature of the relationship. But you are his friend before it comes with the benefits, so you try not to treat him any less. After all, you like spending time with Alhaitham, sex or not, though for some reason he seems almost bewildered when you come over his house and want to take him out for a taco truck you've been craving to eat.
"Isn't this what friends with benefits do?" You point out, biting into your taco. "Being friends with some extra stuff attached?"
Alhaitham looks at you for a moment. You take this time to squeeze some lemon onto his uneaten tacos for him.
"I suppose so," Alhaitham says noncommitally. "I was under the slightest impression you also wanted to use me for experimentation, considering your lack of experience. So you would want to take every opportunity we get to do something."
You scrunch your nose. "I don't like the word 'use.' It’s not like I talked to you and asked you this just for that reason." You frown, and the thought settles in you uncomfortably. "Please don't say that I'm using you. I'm not. I care about you," you say firmly. "I don't want you to feel that type of way, so if you do, we can stop being friends with benefits and just go back to-"
Alhaitham raises his hands in surrender. "No need," he says." I apologize. I wasn't being careful with my choice of words."
The discontent dissipates almost immediately with his words. You can't help but feel pleased. "And aren't you the one with a linguistics degree?" You tease, making him roll his eyes as he takes a bite of his food.
You imagine his eyes are rolled back again if he were to open them now on the ride back to his place as you give him a hand job. Only on the red lights, you vow; you wouldn't want to cause an accident on the road if he were to close his eyes while driving, though the unamused look he gives you has you biting the inside of your cheek to stop smiling.
The two of you end up parked at a neighborhood street when you unclip your seatbelt to finish him off with your mouth. You think his cum tastes a little better than before, and you tell him just as much when Alhaitham tucks himself back in. He only shrugs nonchalantly, but when you look into his fridge later after another session for refreshments you find freshly cut pineapple wrapped in a plate.
You wonder if you would taste better if you started eating them too.
And a month passes with the same routine: you ask if you can come over, the two of you go out to eat or go for an outing before inevitably ending up back at his place for some stress relief. You don't mean to do it every time you go to his place, but it ends up happening anyways. You ask if he wants to try something and then he says yes.
69-ing ends up being a lot more difficult than you anticipated, mainly because you keep getting distracted by things other than the pleasure itself. No matter how many times Alhaitham insists you're not too heavy, and no, you cannot break his neck (his confidence extends in all spheres), you can never get yourself comfortable.
And then there's the alignment issues. You may as well just take turns; it makes it easier for the both of you.
Some things he suggests too, such as face sitting. Alhaitham seems adamant on proving you wrong when he settles underneath you, your thighs on either side of his head as he serves as your seat until your legs are shaking in pleasure.
Alhaitham, you find out, is as good at dirty talk as you imagined. It's the linguistics degree in him, you always joke, but then you're always put in your place when he makes you beg for him to continue eating you out. He is smug as always after these sessions and you can only jab at him to no effect when you see it.
Leaving your jaw slack as he fucks your face, groaning about how good you're taking him, how good you look taking in his cock like you'd like nothing but to take his load down your throat- well. If it was possible for you to finish with just his words, you gladly would have. You are certainly close enough afterwards that Alhaitham only needs his hand on you for a minute before you're creaming onto his fingers, words murmured into your ears like soft feathers.
You voice does end up a little hoarse afterwards, throat sore, but Alhaitham is quick to bring you warm ginger tea to soothe it.
"Go to the bathroom," he tells you sternly. "I won't be responsible for any UTIs."
And when you come back from the bathroom, stark naked (you've instigated round two with this before by accident), your clothes are always ready and folded at the coach with Alhaitham in the kitchen getting you refreshments. It's times like these that make you forced to acknowledge the pink elephant in the room: the more you try not to think about it, the more you feel like Alhaitham would be a really great boyfriend.
Clearly, you overestimated your ability to not catch feelings for a long-time friend whom you trust and has told you straight up he is not interested in dating. You've put yourself in a bit of a sticky situation because you find yourself wanting to abide by the boundaries set by being friends with benefits, but also barely holding back from kissing Alhaitham on the cheek goodbye or asking if you can stay the night. Or taking him on real dates. Or holding his hand when you go out.
You think Alhaitham might not like the hassles that come along with being in a relationship. It's definitely got obligations that he may not be interested in fulfilling-- at least until he finds the right person. The fact he has not said a word to you about it only tells you that you are not that person. (Your heart hopes and yearns though, and you think it needs to shut up.)
Luckily or not, you end up being busy with work and family matters, so you don't get to see Alhaitham for a while. You still message him often, if only to talk about random things or complain about so-and-so. You think you should be more disciplined; perhaps the distance will keep your feelings at bay, but then the moment you find a reprieve in work you're immediately texting Alhaitham to meet up for coffee.
The feelings aren't going away, you think with mild exasperation when you find yourself nodding and hanging onto his every word as he talks about something stupid his coworker has done (and always does). All things come to an end, but you think you like to hang onto Alhaitham like this just a little while longer. Eventually you'll have to broach the dreaded but much needed subject of 'what are we?' but until then, you are more than content being with Alhaitham like this even if you wish you were officially together.
But you can't blame the way things have turned out. After all, if this never happened, would you ever have gotten close to Alhaitham like this?
You check the time on your watch and sigh. "Ugh, I promised I'd run errands for my mom so I gotta go," you say, standing up from the coffee table. You grab your empty cup and toss it in the trash. When you look at Alhaitham, he seems unsure. "Uh, what's up?"
"...I assumed we were going back to my place afterwards," he says carefully. "I thought that was why you called me."
"Oh, no," you say, mouth open with words at the tip of your tongue. You feel your heart rise to your throat as your cheeks grow hot at the honesty of your next words. "I just wanted to see you. Sorry. I should have said something."
"No, it's fine." Alhaitham pushes his seat back to stand too. "You did say we were friends first before the benefits."
You did say that, you remember, but now you can't help but wish the two of you were more than friends. You bite your tongue from blurting those words, but you end up staring at him for a moment too long to not be awkward. "Yeah," you end up saying, "I think I'll be able to see you again next week? I'm less busy, if that's okay?"
"Sure," he says, and you can't help but feel he is so far from you even though he is in arm's reach. "See you then."
It is settled in your heart and head (both in agreement this time) that your friends with benefits relationship with Alhaitham has an expiration date that is coming soon. You like Alhaitham too much to keep pretending that you don't, so it is only a matter of time you end up being just his friend again or begin something anew as a couple. The probability of Alhaitham also catching feelings for you the same time as you is basically zero, you think miserably, so you can only bite the bullet when the time comes.
"I think next time," you say after another session, "I want to have you fuck me."
You hear Alhaitham stop rummaging into his fridge to look at you. His face betrays no emotion and for a frustrating moment, you wish it did just so you can see if he is affected as you are. But this is Alhaitham, and you know better than to expect as much.
"Alright," Alhaitham says. "I can bring the lube and the condoms-"
"No condom," you find yourself saying, "I can take birth control." You look at him, gauging his reaction. "Is that okay with you?"
Alhaitham meets your gaze steadily. "If you are."
"You'll take responsibility, won't you?" You say with a light lilt to your voice, though you trust Alhaitham to take your words seriously. "I'll see you next week?"
He nods. "Next week."
.
The expiration date comes more quickly than you hoped. You shake your head and the negative thoughts away at his front door before you knock. You care for Alhaitham and you like him as more than a friend: these truths are unchanging for you now, so there is no point in despairing about what is not to be. Besides, you don't want your first time-- with someone, with Alhaitham-- to be marred with angst. You want to enjoy it with him to the last minute.
You ring his doorbell and hear his footsteps approach the front door, your heart beating fast in nervous anticipation.
Alhaitham looks normal, which is to say, as calm as ever when he lets you into his apartment. You put your bag down in your usual spot and amble to the kitchen take a sip of water. Alhaitham walks to his room first to wait for you, and with a deep breath in, you follow after him.
You are reminded of the first time you came over to his house, standing there as you wait for Alhaitham to make the first move. Alhaitham does the usual routine: putting the music on, setting out the equipment, and laying down the towel. He turns to you as you quietly watch him and bends down enough to press a kiss to your cheek.
You feel the tension melt away.
You raise your hand to brush his hair from his eyes before cupping his cheeks to bring him closer to kiss. They are gentle ones though still full of feeling, heat thrumming behind every touch and warm breath shared. "Alhaitham," you murmur, his hands sliding your shirt over your head and guiding you toward the couch.
It is almost rehearsed the way Alhaitham's fingers nimbly remove your bra, his knees between your legs as he helps you out of your bottoms. You sit waiting and watching as Alhaitham removes his own clothes--a personal show-- before he is back on top of you, leaving a trail of kisses along the same spots he knows can make you tremble.
And Alhaitham knows you quite well now, you think, beyond the bedroom. He knows how you take your coffee (not black), how you like to order your food (spicy), the way you can get carsick so he drives smoother, the nasty habit of staying up late so he messages you at 11 pm to tell you to sleep. You trust him so terribly much, and he knows you terribly well-- it is no wonder that you fall apart under his touch in no time at all.
"Alhaitham," you breathe out, holding onto his wrist before he overstimulates your clit. "I want you inside of me. Please?"
You let out a surprised gasp when Alhaitham turns you, so he is facing your front. Your heart is beating so loudly underneath your hands where you've rested them on your chest. You think maybe you would have cold feet but instead you are surer than ever that Alhaitham is someone you want to be your first. You gasp in pleasure when Alhaitham's cock clips onto your clit as he glides it forward and back along your sex. You don't think you've ever wanted someone as you wanted Alhaitham.
But you like to think you know Alhaitham well, now better than ever. So when you look up at him as a flicker of emotion flashes across his face, you can identify it. Alhaitham stays in that position between your legs, conflicted, and that is enough to ebb away the waves of desire to ask him if he's okay.
His expression freezes then, his grip on your legs tightening just a little before releasing them again. "What do you mean?" He asks, and you have half a mind to not laugh at the fact he thinks he can fool you.
"We don't have to do this if you don't want to," you say. "Not right now and maybe not ever if that's not something you want-"
"I-" Alhaitham snaps his mouth shut, lips twisting as he tries to say words that, for once, do not come easily to him. "That's not entirely true."
"What's not true?" You prompt.
"That this isn't something I want." Alhaitham looks steadily at you then. "Nothing could be more true."
"...Then how about you fuck something else?" You say, closing your legs and letting the plush of your thighs envelop his cock instead. Alhaitham swallows thickly, though his face is as impartial as ever (but you know better). "Pretend it's the real thing. For practice," you say coyly.
Alhaitham curses under his breath, closing his eyes at the sensation of his cock locked between your thighs.
You breathe out slowly, eyes mesmerized by the slant of his brows from concentration, mouths parted, and eyes closed in pleasure. You find that you don't mind this type of view at all, especially not for the finale. You watch every minute detail of Alhaitham chasing his bliss and ingrain it into your memory to keep.
You breathe out through your nose roughly when Alhaitham's cock hits your clit, his pace quickening as he slickens your thighs with a mix of your arousal and his. You moan at the thought of it, the sounds emanating from it a joint effort between your two bodies.
Alhaitham says your name then, making your heart skip a beat as your focus is back onto him. His eyes don't leave yours as he brings himself close to the climax. "Come for me, Haitham," you say, "come for me, baby."
Almost obediently, Alhaitham does as you say, cum staining your chest as though someone made your body a canvas. You watch him come back from his high, taking a finger to swipe some of it from your chest to taste. You smile at his coyly when you see Alhaitham watch you.
It's been fun, you think, as Alhaitham stands up to grab a towel to clean up. You sit up, combing a hand through your hair, working up the courage to say what needs to be said. You're jolted from your thoughts when you feel Alhaitham wipe a towel across your chest, cleaning up the mess the two of you made.
"Oh, thanks!" You say, laughing, "I almost forgot that was there."
"Your mind works in strange ways," Alhaitham says, and you think you are more compromised than you think when you hear the way his voice seems to dip lower, softer when he speaks to you. He pauses in his movement. "Sorry about earlier," he tells you. "Did you have another idea in mind?"
"It's fine, Haitham." You wave his concerns away. "And, um, sorta? It's nothing sexual actually, I just think I need to talk to you about something."
To his credit, Alhaitham only takes a moment to process your words. "Alright," he says. He takes a towel to wrap around your shoulders before putting his pants back on just for modesty. You watch him fondly as he sits next to you.
"I wanted to say thanks," you begin, "for doing this with me. I trust you to treat me right and you've never proven me wrong."
"No thanks needed," Alhaitham trails off, "is what I normally say but I don't mind a word of gratitude when it comes from you." He lets out a huff of laughter when you knock shoulders with him; yours is the only one that ends up a little sore.
"And I know we started this out as friends with benefits, but, um..." You breathe out. "I think... I've started to catch feelings for you." Not honest enough, you think, and add on, wincing, "A lot, actually. I like you as more than a friend." You turn away from him then, focusing on your hands as they fidget in your lap. "I don't think I can keep on doing this and pretend like I don't, so I think we should stop being friends with benefits."
You stammer, heart fluttering with anxiety, "A-And I know you said you didn't want to be in a relationship anyone, but I was wondering if you were interested in doing that with me...? If not, it's okay, I'm honestly really okay if we stayed as friends. I just wanted to be transparent with you because I think you deserve-"
"Why do you assume I wouldn't like you back?" Alhaitham cuts through. You turn to stare at him, and he meets your eyes and keeps them there. "I never said I didn't want to be in a relationship with anyone."
You stare. "What are you talking about? You're literally the one who told me you were never interested in dating."
"I'm not," Alhaitham says slowly. "I'm not interested in dating, but that doesn't mean I'm not open to being in a relationship with someone."
"Huh?" You blurt out. "But how are you supposed to be in a relationship with someone if you don't meet someone to date them first?"
Alhaitham is patient with you despite your growing frustration. It is so obvious he has connected the dots and is waiting for you to catch up. "I don't need to date," he says, "because I already met someone I'm interested in being with. I don't need to meet new people."
"Wait, what?" You gape. "Who?"
The face that Alhaitham gives you is by far the most unimpressed he has ever looked. You feel like punching it a little. You cross your arms, huffing.
"Give me hints or something," you say, clicking your tongue in annoyance. "Do I know them?"
"Very well," Alhaitham replies, sidling close to you that your arm can feel his body heat.
"Are they from our high school?"
"Yes."
"Really?" You gasp. "Well, we have your friends-"
"They are also your friends."
"-and my friends, which are yours..." You trail off, feeling your face warm and your heart rise to your throat. You can't be hopeful, you think. It is such a dangerous thing when you assume, but you think about who Alhaitham has befriended, who he is still friends with, and who he is closest to. The best answer you keep arriving to is yourself.
Is it too arrogant of you to think that it's you that Alhaitham wants to be with?
"No, it's not prideful to think it's you if it's true," Alhaitham says, and you wonder if you said it aloud. That thought is quickly discarded in favor of thinking over Alhaitham's words. Your heart feels fit to burst, lips wobbly without your permission. His eyes soften when he looks at you then, hand raising to cup your cheek.
"I like you," Alhaitham tells you. "I want to be more than friends."
"More than friends with benefits?" You can't help but ask, and you laugh through the sudden tears when Alhaitham scoffs before pressing his forehead against yours.
"Yeah, way more than that," he says quietly. He presses a gentle kiss to your temple. "I've always wanted more with you."
You sniffle, grinning. "Good thing I asked you then, huh?" You let put a shriek of laughter when Alhaitham pins you down, arms caging you in and making you feel nothing but safe. He looks at you then, eyes full of affection that you wonder how you could have ever missed that before.
"You want to retry from earlier?" Alhaitham asks, pulling your hand to press a kiss to your knuckles.
"I won't lie," you say, laughing when Alhaitham nuzzles his nose into the crook of your neck. "That talk took a chunk of my energy. I kind of want to nap and cuddle. With you! Besides," you say, shifting so that Alhaitham can join you on the coach, the two of you as close as you can be, "we have all the time in the world to do new things together." You turn to look him in the eyes and hopes he sees how much you adore him in equal amounts.
"I can wait," you say, and Alhaitham leans to kiss you.
It is not the last time he does so.
#alhaitham x reader#al haitham x reader#genshin impact x reader#genshin smut#written all on my PHONE thats how down bad i was to write this
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finished kaos! i had a great time with it (LOL if the immediate binge didn't tip that off). check content warnings for the show before you dive in though!
some more spoilery thoughts:
jeff goldblum was perfect casting for zeus. you start off being like ay! it's this goofy guy in a tracksuit who's a little hammy, a little weird, and then the pivot he makes toward becoming more and more menacing is so good
loooooved the fates! did not expect suzy izzard in the show, so that was a pleasant surprise
billie piper as cassandra was another pleasant/unexpected surprise! allll the excellent ladies
styling for all the characters was so, so good. esp dionysus and hera
WOULD DIE FOR THE 3-HEADED PUPPIES and dennis omg rip
i...was rooting for orpheus/eurydice ngl. how can you not with "eurydice" and orpheus straight up choosing her over his life twice. i think the romance between her and caeneus didn't work/went way too fast for it to be believable with the weight they were giving it & the circumstances they both were in. orpheus/eurydice would've been interesting to see as a couple falling out of love trying to build it back up (and maybe failing). or i couldve gone for caeneus/eurydice if they had more build up and more connection than the plot macguffin (yes, yes, i know they were both about "fuck the gods!" but it didnt land for me). love caeneus though, and his puppyyyyyy. excited to see more from him if s2 happens
the show did a really nice job of balancing the gods being these kind of hammy, larger than life creatures with their darker/more menacing natures. the baby scene, kitten scene, etc. all really hammer in that these people have killed their way to the top
the final arrangement of the prophecy montages at the end of the season didnt quite work for me. i liked the energy, where it was going, etc. but i don't think it had the wham! impact they were going for and the pieces didnt line up as neatly as the show was building it up to
FINALLY someone portraying hades as a man who just wants to stay home and have a nap!!! persephone was great too
i swear to fucking god if netflix cancels this before i can see dionysus/ariadne im going to scream and riot
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Kisses & Ribbons
What better day to write my first Hyunjin one-shot than on Valentines day <3
MDNI, OBVIOUS 18+, Smut warnings under the cut.
Word count; 2,301
©ANY translation, copy & paste, posting of my work is strictly forbidden for ANY posts/ writing i post.
PSA FOR ASKS/REQUESTS: i WILL get around to posting everyone’s requests i’m just sorry if it takes a bit of time but whatever you request i’ll post it!! IM ALSO MAKING AN ANON LIST!! just send me anything & tell me what emoji u wanna be!<3
Any reblogs/ Comments are deeply appreciated<3
This is just complete smut with literally no plot.
main masterlist here
SMUT WARNINGS: Marking{f receive} Shibari, PIV, Use of vibrator, lots of praise, a few spanks, spit, creampie, lovemaking, quite fluffy, aftercare, oral {f receive}, experimenting, mention of safe word but not used, flavoured lube, subspace, multiple orgasms,
++ Hyunjin & Reader are married, non idol au, Hyunjin is still a hopeless romantic because DUHH.
You & Hyunjin are just back from a live Jazz music restaurant where you had both decided to spend valentines day, eating delicious food & slow dancing to the music surrounding you but cancelling out as you enjoy the closeness of your husband.
You both practically tumble through the door already kissing eachothers lips, his feeling like mini pillows against your own. You take off his long cream coloured coat & he takes off your matching one.
You both somehow make it to the bedroom before he softly places you on the bed, him following after you & his stomach on your chest, keeping his weight on his elbows & hands before breaking the kiss. "You still up for trying what we discussed, beautiful?" he asks, stroking your hair softly as his eyes glisten. You smile at him & lean up to kiss his nose & you let out an affirmative hum. "of course, i've been thinking about it ever since you mentioned it hunny" you say in a quiet voice, cheeks blushing. Hyunjin hums back at you & he disconnects himself from you, now standing up as he walks over to your shared wardrobe as he fishes out a red velvet box.
He walks over & places it on the bed, not opening it but instead looks back at you. "why not you get undressed for me baby, hmm?" He asks, his ears red & yours equally so. You undo your beige blouse & hyunjin settles himself behind you, helping you wiggle out of your black skirt & tights, kissing your shoulder & back of your neck as he does so.
Hyunjin takes his clothes off too after setting you back down on the bed, leaving him completely bare & you in your red lace thong & matching panties. Hyunjin crawls over you & begins kissing you, his knee in-between your core, your hands reach up to cup his cheeks as you subconsciously begin slowly grinding against his thigh, seeking friction. "You that desperate already baby?" he asks you, hand reaching to your core & cups it. "We can start now then pretty, as stunning as you look in this set, do you mind taking it off for me hm?" he asks you as he lifts himself off of you to reach for the red box still sitting unopened on the bed.
You wriggle your thong off your skin & unclasp your lace bra, your nipples getting hard instantly at the slight temperature change since the material has now came off. Hyunjin opens the box & pulls out a set of red rope with some pieces of ribbon still laying in the box. Your breath hitches slightly as your stomach gets butterflies looking at hyunjin, your husband, holding the rope in his hands. "Can touch it? I wanna feel it." You ask, holding your hand out, he hums & holds the rope out so you can take it as he sits down next to you.
"Are you definitely are you wanna do this sweetie? We don't need to if you're having any sort of second thoughts." Hyunjin says softly, taking the rope back off you as he leans in to your neck & gives your earlobe a couple of kisses. "Of course i want to, you know i'll tell you if i change my mind babe" you reply, eyes closing to fully take in how nice his kisses feel. Hyunjiin hums again & pulls away from your neck, your back shivering at the loss of contact.
"Okay, do you remember the safe word y/n? You can use it any time.. of course." His voice soft in tone, now straightening out the rope in his hands. "red. I won't forget." You blush as you watch hyunjins veiny hands feeling the rope. He smiles back.
"Okay baby, lie down for me for me please." You don't even think twice before crawling up so your head is on the pillows, hyunjin following behind.
Hyunjin begins tying the red rope around each of your limbs & torso, creating chriss-crosses in-between your tits, slightly pinching them before slightly manhandling you, flipping you on your back to finish the ties, kissing each inch of skin he covers. By the end, your hands are tied to your stomach, immobile, your legs connected to your hands so you're in a mating press & you have rope on the very insides of your thighs, causing a slight pinch & burn on your outer flaps. He grabs the ribbons that were still inside the box & ties them to your knees, one above your pussy & the other one on the bits of rope that cross over in-between your breasts.
Hyunjin finishes tying you up before standing up to admire hiss work & also to admire you. "Does anything pinch or hurt more than it should?" He questions, finger stroking your leg. "No, i'm fine to continue hunny." you reply, showing him a smile.
Hyunjin walks over to the bedside table beside you & pulls out some strawberry flavoured lube & a small bullet vibrator. He kisses you from the side which you gladly reciprocate, feeling extra needy. He walks around & crawls up the bed so his face is now at your now dripping cunt. "Look how wet you are jagi, my mouth is watering even looking at it.already swollen, your clit is peeking through already." He shoots you a smile & you blush instantly, getting a bit shy.
He flicks open the small bottle of flavoured lube & lets a few droplets drip onto your cunt which makes you flinch but the rope makes it impossible to move away. He opens his tongue & puts a bit of the lube on it before he moves down & takes a long, slow lick the entire way up your core, making you gasp as he lets out a groan. He pulls back to spit onto your core. "I don't know why i ate dessert earlier when i knew this can't be compared to anything on any menu in the world. Pussy is so plump & swollen because of the rope isn't it? You enjoy it this much hmm?"" He hums out, looking at you with his cat eyes. "Feels so good jinnie, don't stop, please." You tilt your head sideways to avoid the eye contact, getting shy of the position & helpless position you're currently in but he is quick to tug at one of the ropes up at your tits, making you jolt & you look back in his direction, eyes slightly watery from the burn. "Don't get all shy on me now, we're just getting started." He doesn't give you a chance to reply before he basically dives back into your folds.
He begins slurping, nibbling, kissing & straight up moans into your core which obviously sends vibrations to your clit, making you whine out even louder than hyunjins noises. He adds a finger into your wet walls & that tip you over the edge instantly, your legs try their best to shake despite the rope keeping you set in place as you come undone all down his fingers & tongue. You open your eyes as you come down from your high & realise hyunjin has been giving you kisses & sucking dark marks onto them while he waits. "Ji-jinnie need you, p-please" you pant out, still trying to catch your breath & tugging against the ropes holding your arms. "Soon, y/n, be patient. I'm not quite full yet mkay? let me show you how much i love you." you can't help but get butterflies in your stomach, despite being together for so long now.
You open your mouth to reply but the words get caught in your throat as he dives straight back into your cunt, letting his nose nudge against your clit repeatedly as his tongue now makes its way inside you, making you practically squeal. You try your best to jolt your hips away but also closer to his face at the same time, you don't even acknowledge the now buzzing vibrator now making noise until it presses against your completely ruined clit which makes you quite literally scream. "J-jin-baby too-too much!" you say, tugging against your ropes, to no use.
Hyunjin doesn't reply verbally as he now releases his tongue from your hole, your juices dripping off his tongue onto the bedsheets, joining the huge wet patch already formed on the bedsheets with the lube, spit & your juices. He drags the vibrator down from your clit & inserts it inside you as he now suctions his lips back onto your clit & begins wiggling his tongue & spitting his saliva all over your clit as he swears he can feel your clits heartbeat, at the same time he begins grinding his naked cock against the bed, getting some friction & stopping his movements every time he feels himself getting close. You are thrashing around, eyes watering & drool leaving your mouth, leaving you in a complete babbling mess.
Your next orgasm hits you before you can even warn him.. your orgasm making itself known by spraying all over the bedsheets, hyunjins face & in his mouth. He unlatches himself as you're legs are shaking uncontrollably & he smacks your thighs & red raw pussy, making you scream even more.
Hyunjin takes his breath back as he rests on his knees, looking at the state you're currently in, sweaty, drool everywhere, tears staining your cheeks, skin all red from where the rope has been rubbing against it, leaving marks he will be appreciating even after tonight & your cunt, red, pulsating & 1.5x the size it usually is.
He crawls up the bed so he is beside you,face still covered & glistening in your juices & rests his head on his hand as he grips your jaw to make you look at him. "You already floating hm? That's way faster than usual.. new record, you still wanna continue?" He asks, fingers still holding onto your jaw as he slithers his thumb into your mouth & you let him, tongue circling it slowly as you nod at his words, giving him the go-ahead.
Hyunjin gets off the bed before walking around to your side of the bed & he pulls you so your ass is against the edge of the bed & your head is in the middle. He drags his cock up & down your folds because he can't help but be addicted to the way you slightly gasp at his touch but too far in your own world to even properly react or flinch.
He spits onto his cock to lube it up that extra bit & then pulls out the vibrator, completely soaking wet as he turns it off & lays it on the bed. He pumps his cock once then lines it up to your folds before slowly pushing in.
He lets out a loud groan as his eyes snap shut & his head rises up to face the ceiling, trying his best to not blow instantly. He looks down at you to already see you looking at him, mouth slightly open as your eyebrows are slightly frowned, making faint noises. He thrusts into you slowly, both of you making noises, his much louder than yours, He wants.. needs to be closer to you so he unties your legs from where they're connected & he spreads them enough so he can lie forward, chests connecting as he begins kissing down your neck, whispering things in your ear. "so good for me hunny, trusting me like this.. you are the most beautiful person.. thing, in this entire existence, you.. feel s-so amazing my love, g'na cum in your..my pussy mkay?ffuck." He raises himself off your chest & stands back up, moving his now damp, sweat drenched hair out of his also sweat covered face.
He reaches down to tug on the rope against your tits again, dragging red marks into your flesh which makes him whine even more just simply at the sight. Your eyes are completely glossy as your tongue is rolling out of your mouth & your babbling incoherent words. Hyunjin reaches down to play with your clit again & you let out a choked louder whine at the feeling, twitching as you clamp around hyunjins dick as you come again, even stronger than the previous ones if that's even possible which makes Hyunjins hips stutter.
"cummin' around me b-baby? g-g-d you're a w-w-work of art, my own muse, gna cum, t-t-you feel too good." He grunts as he leans into you again, stroking your cheek & your hair s he cums inside you, biting down on his pink plump lips as his own orgasm shoots through his veins.
You both stay in this position for a few minutes, heavy breathing & little whimpers filling the room. Hyunjin uses the rest of his strength to pick himself up again & he begins untying you from the rope, kissing all of the red marks & soothing them with his fingers. He leans up & kisses your lips & tip of your nose before he grabs a damp towel he set on the dresser before the scene started & slowly wipes your cunt, cleaning it up & trying to help calm down some of the swelling.
He positions you back up so your head is on the pillows & comes up & lies next to you as he gets the bottle of water he had left in the bedroom & opens it & holds it to your lips. "cmon baba, you gotta drink this, hm? this took a lot out of you" he whispers in your ear, you don't reply but you part your lips for him to feed you some water which you swallow. He places the water bottle back on the bedside table & he cuddles into you, surrounding you in his warmth as he kisses all possible areas he can reach of you. "Happpy valentines day, my love" he says, kissing your earlobe, admiring you as your eyes shut, breathing now calming down as you nuzzle yourself in his chest, skin on skin as you're both still lying naked, no noise in the room except the clock ticking & your breathing.
#stray kids#skz smut#skz scenarios#skz imagines#skz x reader#straykids x reader#hyunjin#hyunjin x reader#hyunjin smut#hyunjin fluff#fluff#kpop smut#smut#romance#changbin#bang chan#han jisung#jeongin#lee know#seungmin#felix#lovers
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Vox x male reader unfamiliar feelings..
Vox x male reader.
Warnings: swearing, kissing, aggression, strangling.
Words: 1.6k
Thought I'd do some Vox for a change
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I've been safely working at the Hazbin Hotel. Charlie's been more than kind. She let me stay for free, knowing my struggles. Though despite the face that I've got her help, Vox can still make me appear into thin air if needed. I'm still trapped. A worthless demon like me binded to a powerful overlord called Vox. I was relaxing in my hotel room. I suddenly felt myself black out for a moment. Like I was fading away.
This feeling was familiar, and I wasn't surprised one bit when I opened my eyes to see Vox. Great, what does he need now.
"Vox." I say in a stern tone. I was clearly not happy with his presence.
"Ah, where the FUCK have you been!?" He says as he lunges up in his chair in anger. His screen glitches as he shouts into my face. He's slightly taller, so I have to rotate my head to look up at him.
I hesitate to answer. I mean, if he knew I was in his enemies' hotel? He would absolutely murder me. "Away." i say simply. I didn't intent of telling him my where abouts any time soon.
His face only glitches more in anger. His fists clench as he grabs my neck and pulls me close to him. So my face is inches away from his. "Answer my FUCKING QUESTION" he says shouting once again. His screen glitches when he's angry. I choke and feel tears prickle in my eyes. He was gripping my throat with intense strength. I flinch as he lifts his other hand to my shoulder and claws at it.
"I- just at a..f-friends house!-" i say. I could barely breathe since he was gripping intently at my throat. He squints his eyes at me and stays silent for a while. He rolls his eyes before dropping me onto the floor.
I fall to the floor. I'm a thump. I groan and gasp for air while grasping my now purple neck. Vox speaks again. I feel a familiar chain appear at my neck. I look up at Vox with watery eyes.
"Don't forget who owns you, sweetheart. You dont want to fuck with me!" He says before the chain disintegrates into thin air. My head falls and I wiped the tears on my face before Vox had a chance to notice them. He'd probably make fun of me for being so pathetic. "Yes.. sir." I say in almost a whisper. I felt so pathetic under Vox. He rolls his eyes and snickers. He then walks out of the office, leaving me on the floor.
I slowly catch my breath and rise from the floor. I rub at my still bruised neck before I fo some paperwork. I have a little desk at the back of Voxs office. It's a little space where I can do paperwork. Im assuming the reason why he called me here was to do his shit work. I haven't seen him for about 2 months now. Normally, he would summon me at least once a week.
I sat down and automatically saw a pile of papers dumped onto my desk. I sigh and slump onto the wooden chair. I grab a few papers and start signing and writing some random shit on them. Vox told me to just sign everything. I mean, he doesn't really care. If he can't be fucked to go to a meeting then he would just cancel it, with no feeling of shame at all.
After what feels like hours, I've finally completed half the stacks of paper. I rub my neck again since it's sore. I continue to pick out papers and sigh away. I didn't bother reading them. Why would I? Suddenly, Vox enters his office again. I don't move at all. I don't even bother looking at him. I just lean onto my knuckle and repetitively write Voxs name over and over again. I see Voxs flat-screened head rotate and glare at me. I don't move again, and he just sits onto his chair. He straps the wires to the back of his head and does whatever shit he usually does.
I felt so tired, overwhelmed, and bored. All this dumb paperwork. I mean, I know this guy is famous and all, but still. People can't care that much about him. I mean, I don't. He's not too bad, I guess. Sometimes he's nice sometimes he's not. His mood mainly depends on Valentino. If Val pisses him off, then he would lash out of everyone. It's not entirely his fault. Valentinos a bitch and Vox gets stressed easily. I somewhat understand. But sometimes it's too much.
I rub my worn-out eyes and groan. I hold back a yawn before I lean against the back of my chair. Vox glares at me again, and I turn to make eye contact with him. The silent communication is cut off when I look away. His eyes were different than usual. Some different emotions he's never expressed for me before. Sympathy, maybe? Could be.
I sigh and lean on both my hands. I lean against the table and drift away into a deep slumber. I didn't mean to. Though the activities I did with Charlie earlier and all this paper work.
Vox turns and notices I was asleep. He holds back a smile and approaches my sleeping body. He taps my shoulder to justify that I was actually asleep. He slowly and carefully picks me up, bridal style, and relocates me. He walks towards a door in the corner of his office and walks through it. His bedroom.
He delicately puts me down and tucks me into the bed. He smiled down at me before writing on a piece of paper he found scattered on his desk. He then leaves. He quietly shuts the door and leaves.
Hours later, I awake finally. I have slept for a while. I was clearly sleep deprived. I sit up and look around the room, confused. Where the fuck was I? I quickly went to run out the room when I noticed a ink covered peice of paper. I pick it up and read it.
"Morning, or whenever you wake up. I just wanted to say sorry earlier. I didn't mean to treat you that way. I had a bad day and took it out on you. Let's talk."
From Vox
I couldn't help but smile. That was sweet. Well, the bare minimum, but for Vox, this was a big step. He never shows sympathy or any fucks for his minions. This actually meant something. My head flies up to the door as someone slowly starts opening it. I see Vox glare into the room to see if I was asleep. He enters when he sees me.
"Oh. Mornin'.. um. Are you doing okay?" He says quietly. He approaches the bed and lifts my chin before looking at my neck. I blush and glare at his pretty but flat face.
"Since when are you nice?" I say somewhat teasingly and somewhat truthful. I mean, I'm right. He's never nice.
"Yeah, yeah, shut up." He says as he rolls his eyes with sass. I chuckle slightly and smile up at him. He's been nice, well, in his own way.
"The letter, let's chat," He says. I have no time to deny before he sits on the bed beside me.
"So. Val has been a little fucking asshole. I mean, the idiot thinks he can boss me around like I'm his boy toy, and -" He stops talking for a moment. "Never mind. Um. But I've been.. pissed off lately. So I lashed out on you." He says. He seemed genuine. His normally loud dementure not present. I nod. I somewhat forgive him. My neck still hurts but he's trying. Which makes it count.
"Yeah so. Sorry for being a bitch. Asshole I don't know. I um. I guess I just find you different from the other fucks." I chuckle at that. Though he's calm whenever he talks about someone else he grits his teeth.
"You find me different? How?" I question. I generally was confused. How was I different? I assumed he meant because I'm not an overlord. I'm weaker then everyone else he knows. Anyone that's not Velvet or Valentino is under him. Though I could be wrong. Because I've never met this Vox before.
"I guess I uh.. feel different with you. The others fucking stress me out. You dont- as much." He says. Adding a snarcky comment on the end. Of course. Why wouldn't he?
"How.. surprisingly charming." I say. He rolls his eyes and looks away. He thinks of what to say before turning to look at me.
"Oh fuck you. Really. But I feel different with you. Fuck knows what that means." He says as he leans back slightly. I smirk and glare at him.
"Aww you have a little crush on me Vox?~" I say teasingly. His screen turns a lighter and brighter blue. I pull playfully at his bowtie all while having complete eye contact.
"Oh fuck you asshole- I'm trying to be nice yknow?" I smile at that and move my hands away from his bowtie. I look into hi alluring red eyes. They're actually quite beutiful.
"Yeah. I appreciate it though. Your not too bad." I say. He smiles at that. Oh that smile. He normally just smirks but that soft smile is so fucking attractive. I grab his bowtie again and peck the side of his screen. "I'll see you tomorrow, Vox." I say before getting up and leaving.
Vox was left dumbfounded. You just kissed him? Why? Why did he like it? His screen blanked out and read; 'warning, emotion overload.'
Let's just say, Vox's day got better. Way better
#hazbin hotel#romance#hazbin hotel x male reader#hazbin hotel x reader#male y/n#hazbin vox#hazbin hotel vox#vox#vox x reader
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I'm curious what you don't like about dao Leliana? If you've got any posts about it could you please point me in their direction?
i probably have posts somewhere but god knows where they are now. i will present a little overview
and to be clear, because i know this website, this is completely a matter of personal taste in writing and character, i am not, um, cancelling leliana dragonage or having anything but appreciation for those who like her, i am saying i probably wouldn’t want to hang out with her. i am also not attempting to convince anyone or justify anything, i am explaining my own feelings since i have been asked about them. i am going to use language that sounds a little overly harsh because i am trying to express those feelings succinctly without making this post very long by apologising and minimising with caveats about when i do like her
i find her a little grating. i find her characterisation based on her backstory irritatingly inconsistent, with genuinely confusing naivete for someone with a supposedly hardened backstory. she’s a literal bard, and she’s always always on the back foot in dialogue with quicker thinkers who can easily shock and scandalise her, and she believes horrors are too ugly for anyone to write about (literal bard!). i’m also vaguely baffled by the amalgamation of vibes they went for visually, like, idk for example, repeatedly mentioning the supposedly ragged boyish hair of someone incapable of understanding a lack of interest in high fashion and who expresses friendship by talking about nice shoes and hair specifically. it makes me struggle to buy into her as a character, and i find her hard to picture.
i think her compassion for others rings fairly false, possibly just on a poor voice acting level; if they wanted me to believe in it from listening to her dialogue when she chimes in during side quests, they got it wrong, i don’t. those bland comments, as cloying on the tongue as artificial sweetener instead of real sugar, are a let-down when i could have someone more entertaining in the party. i hear her talk and think: i wish i’d brought someone else. and her kindness is often shallow, buying into prejudice easily when left unchecked. which is again, weird for a character whose entire concept is being more worldly than she appears. part of that backstory is also definitely growing up mostly surrounded by elven servants, which makes those biases in that direction even more notable to me than they otherwise would be. she’s someone who’s absorbed in her own internal struggle yet who has never noticed the struggles of those around her until directly confronted. i am constantly disappointed by the missed opportunities with her character, like her mixed cultural identity barely being discussed in a game where the backdrop of the ferelden-orlais conflict being under-explored is to me one of really very few big storytelling mistakes, or like her mechanic where you can ask her about wherever you are—a really fun idea, for a bard!—and she literally never not once has anything interesting to say. like, come onnn. im the worldbuilding enjoyer. hit me with something
some of this is going to be affected also by me having spent the most time with her as my surana, who happens as a character to be a natural born hater, and also predisposed to share some of these feelings. i do find dao leliana much more fun to hang out with when playing a non-elven, non-mage character, but given the in-world context, that in itself is perhaps not a glowing recommendation? (obligatory note again, i am not up in arms that this fictional character has fictional prejudices against fictional people and i in fact think this part is good writing that suits the world. the version of her i adore is, after all, in dai when she has done significantly more wrongs including against elves and mages specifically.) it’s more that kindness should be what leliana has going for her as one of the most prominently good-aligned companions, and i don’t believe in hers. if i’m committing to this being me disliking the character rather than disliking some writing flaw, i could say that i read her compassion as a performance, and that’s something i happen to never really like in a person or character: when they act because they want to look like a good person, and feel like a good person, rather than because they truly care about the impact of their actions. maybe i don’t prefer her in dai because she’s somehow better written; maybe she just drops that mask i don’t care for. hard to say!
also her personal quest has some of the worst writing and acting in the game i never want to hear marjolaine again. please.
#and now for a childish addition: also i cant believe i get leliana and maric gets katriel. i shouldve had katriel#i wouldve treated her right.#leliana enjoyers please dont hate me for this i love your work. i love that you love your girl shes just not for me#top ten posts i am going to regret in the morning. hits that post button
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HIIII :3 ITS ME... the 🐓!!!!!!!!
So we've had brainror abt reader turning into a cat but what about Dottore?? and his segments?
Reader walks in one day to see a big blue puff cloud and when it disapears theres a bunch of blue cats roaming around and meowing (As soon as they see reader its on sight and they WILL be begging for affection)
Reader sitting on a counch while a bunch of cats surround and suffocate them (it reminds them of Foxttore and the pufflings)
I NEED TO BE SURROUDNED BY A BUNCH OF CATTORES NOWWW Auauuuug
all the cats BITING reader affectionately (they are so MEAN even though reader is so nice to them 😔) AND OMGGG ZANDY AS A TINY LIL KITTEN AUUUUGGG MY HEART IM EXPLODING. ZANDY KITTY 3 SAUCES TALL!!!!!!! his lil meows..... 😭😭
I am ill..... I need doctor..... - 🐓
DOTTOCATS!!! CATTORES!!! <3 It would be the result of a failed experiment of course, just like all the other mishaps that always happen in the lab. Only that this is a lot worse than all the other ones. For them, at least. For you, you could die happily, surrounded by all of this kitty cuteness. Cattores are not amused by your lack of seriousness at the situation. No, they are not cute. Wait, is that a Kamera you have? Don't you dare.
Unfortunately for them, despite all the words they try to spew out, it only comes out as 'meow meow, meow meow meow! meow!' much to their dismay. You don't take their kitty anger too seriously, until they quickly learn how to utilize their new body (biting and repeatedly clawing your leg for attention). (Funnily enough somehow the masks shrunk down to the same size too?)
You will have the tall task of creating the cure to turn them back to normal humans but it won't be too much of a problem, they already have the ingredients in their mouth and are impatiently waiting for you to hurry up. You take your sweet time and take lots of breaks petting Zandy kitty, the only one who doesn't bite you and always brushes against your leg.
Just please cancel that meeting he has with Pantalone today. Please. And then be prepared for when he turns back. At least a cat his biting power isn't that much. As a human, however, well, you already know how that goes. (Isn't he much better to cuddle like this, Dottore asks, as you are trapped for a long time in his arms.)
#smooches talks#🐓 anon#dottore love notes <3#i still need to write that dottore catboy fic... sigh#i still love the way u speak “ZANDY KITTY 3 SAUCES TALL!!!!!!!” makes me laugh too hard#cradling him very gently... ouh#WAIT I JUST REALIZED UR PROBABLY REFERENCING THAT MEME OF THE KITTEN NEXT TO THE SAUCES#HELPPPP READER WOULD!!#meanwhile omega and prime kitty is like... idk a lot more
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Short Translation from Twisted Wonderland the second novel: Grim's Realization (pt1/2)
"‘Magic that can control other people's movements? Man, if I had a unique magic as convenient as that, I'd be controlling the teachers to make every day a self-study day.’
‘Would there even be a point to that?’ Yuuya laughs. ‘Wouldn't it be better to just cancel school altogether?’
‘Nice, that sounds good, too. We could just goof off every day.’
Sensing someone’s eyes upon them, Yuuya and Ace glance over to Riddle. Unlike moments before, his brow is now deeply furrowed. It would seem the serious Riddle does not approve of such remarks.
‘If it were me, homework would…’ Noticing Riddle's stern expression a bit late, Deuce quickly gives a wave of his hand.
‘No, nevermind! Nothing an honor-student would say—forget I said anything.’
‘First-years are just so fresh and adorable. Don't you agree, Riddle-kun?’
‘Not in the least. I'd much prefer it if they were more polished, and took their studies more seriously.’
Cater laughs aloud while Grim, grinning at his side, lets his imagination run wild.
‘If it were me, I'd be makin’ everybody in the school give me food, every day.’
‘Haha, that's so you, Gri-chan.’
‘Yeah. Then the lunches, snacks from the store and breads would be all for me! I’d eat as many of those rare, deluxe menchi-katsu sandwiches…as I…wanted..."
Grim tilts his head.
’…Ah!’
Grim suddenly lets out a yell that echoes throughout the cafeteria, and those around the group all turn to look at him. Quickly covering Grim’s mouth Yuuya bows his head, apologizing, and the other students return to their conversations.
‘What are you yelling about?’
‘I know who it is! The guy who’s got that unique magic!’
Grim pulls away from Yuuya with a serious look.
‘It's Ruggie! That obnoxious thief is our guy!’
‘Wha—Ruggie-senpai?’
‘That's right,’ Grim gives a vigorous nod of his head. ‘He's the one who made me trade my deluxe menchi-katsu sandwich for some tiny an-bread the other day! I didn’t even wanna trade ‘im, my body just moved on its own like I got taken over. It’s gotta be him.’
It’s true that Grim had been acting strangely. Ace and Deuce look just as surprised as Yuuya.
’So wait, you really weren’t moving on your own?’
‘But I was right there next to Grim, and I didn’t notice anything.’
‘Riddle-senpai, Cater-senpai—what do you think?’ Yuuya asks, looking to his two upperclassmen."
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