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smokesandsonatas · 1 year

Note

can i have some headcanons of what our twisted wonderland boys will do after they graduate? you can choose only 4 if there is a limit, thank you so much

Twisted Wonderland characters after their graduation at NRC

- This really tickled my brain so I'm going to write assumptions for everyone. I drafted this around last year then only got to post this right now, haha. -

Heartslabyul

Riddle Rosehearts

After his graduation from NRC, and bagging home the highest honor for an exceptional mage, I can see Riddle furthering his education. If there's such a thing as Ph.D. in Twisted Wonderland, Riddle will pursue that. I can also see him becoming a "Double Doctor," a medical doctor, and a doctor of Philosophy. Not only that but Riddle will also pursue law, along with magical medicine. A doctor and a lawyer, all in one. Riddle would go on to be an internationally recognized mage. He will also be an advocate of Mental Health education, fueled by his past and his mission to never let anyone experience what he went through.

Ace Trappola

I can honestly say I see him being recognized as a famous basketball player or entering the military enforcement of Queendom of Roses along with Deuce. Occasionally, Ace will perform magic tricks along with his brother, which is always a hit of course, someone even offered the Trappola brothers to appear in a reality show but Ace had other plans. In his 3rd year, he will become the Dorm leader of Heartslabyul, while Deuce will be his vice.

Deuce Spade

Will become a high-ranking magical enforcer, his salary will allow him and his family to live comfortably, especially his mom. Once the Queendom of Roses gave Deuce an award as the 'Hero of the Year,' he broke down into tears as he hugged his mom. Will be buddies forever with Ace.

Cater Diamond

Will be a famous vlogger. Be it traveling or fashion, Cater will be a famous influencer. He will also have a successful studio with workshops on how to run a magicam account successfully. If there's a fashion show, he would always be on the VIP list, as he is acquainted with Vil. If he feels burned out, he'll try to stay away from social media. If Cater can't form long relationships, he'll just leave his mark in the world with his vlogs. #LonelyButNotReally

Trey Clover

Owner of a famous bakeshop. His family's shop will prosper under his guidance. On every occasion, their sweets will sold out. One time a magazine listed Trey as the "sexiest pastry chef," and Cater and his other friends will never let him live with it. The Clover's Bakeshop occasionally partners with Mostro Lounge, and when they do, everything sells out within seconds.

Savanaclaw

Leona Kingscholar

He does not need to work, but he is a genius as Leona is still a prince of a noble family. Have you seen those alpha males ads? Leona will be all of that. A CEO of his own company and at the same time a diplomat of Sunset Savannah to other nations. His business started out as a mining corporation, gradually expanding into construction. A noble man who many people - beastmen and beastwomen - fawn over with. A millionaire. A bachelor. Once, Farena, the current king and his older brother, called to meet with him and Leona put harshly down the phone. Leona's reason for doing this? When he realized that Farena tried to marry him off to a noble from some rich kingdom 'for his future'. Leona's reply? Is a simple scoff and a very deep, "Fuck off."

Ruggie Bucchi

Will be an assistant to Leona. The next generation of Hyenas will not experience poverty as Ruggie did. His all-around skills will come in handy as a secretary. Ruggie will be a finance speaker. He will sometimes get his hands dirty. What? Hyenas are used to it. Fear not, he's still the same old Ruggie, just a little more rich.

Jack Howl

After graduation, Jack will get a lot of offers to be a professional magift player. Leona will offer to sponsor him tho, so he doesn't need to worry about financial things. Will be an advocate of physical health, his muscular physique is no joke. I can see Jack being a well-known magift player and a track and field competitor, with the help of Prof. Vargas as a head coach.

Octavinelle

Azul Ashengrotto

In every nation, there's a branch of Mostro Lounge. Azul will be listed as the "Top 100 most successful bachelors," along with Jade, possibly Floyd, Vil, and Leona. Azul would go on to accumulate a lot of awards for his splendid business skills. Will own a share in almost all known companies. He'll have to pull strings from Idia to let him invest or buy shares from Jupiter Enterprises. Azul will be compared to the Sea Witch due to how influential he is. Once his mother passed him their restaurant in the Coral Sea, Azul's work will quadruple, and so is his income. Because of him, the mermen's view of octomerpeople will change. But for a darker secret, Azul will be known as the Mediator, and every Mostro Lounge place will be known as a neutral territory for members of the 'other' world. Of course, the Leech twins will still stick with him.

Jade Leech

Jade will inherit their Father's mafia legacy, along with Floyd. The Leech family will prosper under the twins' rule. Jade will open a mushroom business, as to what kind of mushrooms he's selling Jade will smile in response and say it's a fresh mushroom from the mountain. Jade's favorite base of operation would be on land, it's just more fun and chaotic when he watches humans stutter and pass out once he interrogates them. Jade will work as Azul's concierge, working for both him and the Leech family. And in the morning, he'll be the vice manager of Mostro Lounge. But sometimes it does get a little boring. Once a company famous for being greedy with their demands easily relents when they realize it is The Jade Leech that will conduct business with them. Such a shame, Jade would've loved to see the look on their faces.

Floyd Leech

Floyd would be proud of his shoe collection! By now he would have a hundred pair of shoes. Of course, he's still with Jade and Azul, acting as the brawns of the trio. He will make it a point with them to only give him interesting jobs, if it's boring? Floyd would abandon that. One time he learned to drive, he brought his sports car to another country and accidentally got pulled over in the Queendom of Roses, to his surprise it is Mackerel (Deuce) who pulled him over! Floyd paid for the ticket and then went on to hang out with him. Floyd's favorite part of his job is squeezing everyone that owes them unpaid debts!

Though Floyd just doesn't understand why Momma Leech wants to introduce him to a mermaid. Jade is laughing at first, but not anymore once his twin realized that their Momma intends to introduce him to a mermaid too! Floyd will never forget the look on Jade's face - that's probably reflected on him - once their Momma gushes over about 'baby eels'. What? Mermaid eels have little populations. They have to do their part, don't they?

Scarabia

Kalim Al-Asim

Kalim inherited his father's multi-million business. Through his easygoing personality, Kalim is well-loved by everyone. He established business trade routes with almost every nation, while still honoring his personal ones. An example is with the Felmier's, so that their apples will be enjoyed by everyone in Scarabia. The threats grew along with the Asim's already immense wealth. Don't worry, Kalim by now, will know how to defend himself using his unique magic. He just had to know how to reply with the various marriage proposals going his way, it pains Kalim to reject every single one, you know.

Jamil Viper

After his graduation at NRC, Jamil would take a year or two for himself. He will travel across Twisted Wonderland, and by this time Jamil's perception of the world would change. Finally prioritizing himself and is selfish for once. When he will come back, however, he will be met with a warm welcome from the citizens of Scalding Sands and the Asim and Viper family. Jamil would go on to become a successful businessman and bodyguard best friend of Kalim. But this time, they're on equal footing.

Pomefiore

Vil Schoenheit

There's no spotlight if there's no Vil Schoenheit. He will become the highest-paid actor for straight 5 years, until Neige just slightly beats him, running off a few hundred thousand madol. But in the same year, Neige surpassed him in pay, Vil went on to win the Best Actor award for his work in a movie as a misunderstood villain protagonist. His movie even screened in the coral sea! As if there's no stopping him, his successful cosmetics company took off Twisted Wonderland by storm, his eye palette alone is sold out within seconds.

Rook Hunt

Oh dear, Rook will also inherit the Hunt's family business. One moment someone can see Rook in Quendom of Roses then the next he would be spotted on Sage Island. Of course, Rook will not stop admiring beauty and arts! He will fund archaeological studies, theater, art museums, galleries, and even beauty pageants. Rook will be one of the art and beauty industry's most important benefactors.

Epel Felmier

Will be known as the "pretty boy of magift." Not in a bad way, but more like a compliment. His talent is honed thanks to his NRC club. Sometimes Epel would attend fashion shows that present him as a "manly man", you know wearing suits and all of that. Because of his new-found fame, the Felmier's apple business will bloom, in part thanks to Kalim.

Ignihyde

Idia Shroud

Will become the head of S.T.Y.X, but will also manage the Shroud's position in Jupiter Enterprises. On top of that, Idia will develop one of the best MMORPG and FPS games Twisted Wonderland had ever seen. Additionally, Idia won't just stop in developing games, he will also develop magic-infused medical devices that will drastically change the healthcare industry, crediting the Idia Shroud for its invention.

Once a magazine included Idia in their "Top 100 most successful bachelors," he almost sued them if not for Azul, Ortho and his parents convincing him it's a good thing. But Momma and Papa Shroud can't help but wonder when will they have grandkids, the Shroud's need an heir to continue their duties, you know.

Ortho Shroud

Ortho will stay at his brother's side! But his looks will drastically change, if the Ortho from before looks young, the Ortho from the future will have a much taller body, but he will still regain his childlike curiosity. Only the future Ortho is more mature and more open to take time for himself. He will ask Idia to send him off to faraway lands to gather information and to also satiate his curiosity about the real world. Ortho will become independent yet still close to his brother.

Diasomnia

Malleus Draconia

Malleus' coronation is one of the most liveliest and solemn celebrations Briar Valley had seen for the last 5 centuries. Under King Malleus' rule, his kingdom will prosper. Faes and humans alike will come to a much more common understanding. Although the valley still heavily relies on magic, technology will become available, as a courtesy of the friendship acquaintanceship of Idia.

On some days, Malleus will truly get busy. Managing a country and it's affairs is no small feat. Through trades and partnership with every Kingdom, from Savanaclaw to the Coral Sea courtesy of his two alumni schoolmates from NRC, Briar Valley will prosper. It just gets annoying sometimes when the news reporters, the common folk, the fae senators, and even his own grandmother will ask him about an heir. Malleus still needs to find someone who will stay by his side, and it's not an easy thing to do.

Lilia Vanrouge

Sweet old man Lilia is on his way to retirement. In the chapter of Diasomnia, we learned that his magic is running out. Well, all good things must come to an end. Though his eventual retirement in the Land of the Red Dragon came true, he still returned. And Lilia had his fair share of adventures. Because Malleus is busy with the preparations for his coronation, Lilia is there to help him. On the occasion he's free to do anything, Crowley offered him a teaching position in NRC, which is the spot left open by Professor Trein. Lilia accepted, and for a semester he become a teacher, quitting right after to attend Malleus' coronation.

Lilia liked to think a had lived a full life. He was it all. A fearsome general, a caretaker of the young prince, an adoring father, and a good friend.

Sebek Zigvolt

No one dares to Disrespect the King under my watch! That is what he would occasionally say. If one of Briar Valleys' own Fae advisors disrespects Malleus, expect Sebek to speak, and even draw his sword. Yes, he's part human and half Fae but that doesn't mean he's not powerful enough to defend the king.

With this Sebek will grow in closer relationship with his grandfather and his mortal dad. His parents' dentistry business will expand, and for some time Sebek's face is the model of it, which made him embarrassed, yet he still loves his parents nonetheless.

Silver

I can see Silver honoring his promise to Lilia and staying by Malleus'side. However, that is considering if his feelings don't change. Silver will quickly become one of Briar Valley's most beloved humans, and for some reason, he always gets mistaken as an RSA graduate. Once Vil invited him to cover for a sick model in a fashion show and he declined but Vil already presented his picture to the photographers. For some reason, his picture was leaked to the public and Silver's name is trending for days. Some say he's a child of the king, and others compare him to Neige's beauty. His face was everywhere in magicam, with the hashtags "the most handsome sleepy prince," and the "dreamy prince of dreams."

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madamepestilence · 11 months

Text

2024 US Election Information

We have roughly 1 year until the 2024 US election. I've put in some research, and here are my conclusions.

TLDR for those of you who don't have time or focus: Cornel West (Democratic Socialist running as People's Party -> Green Party) is the ideal candidate to vote for - normally I wouldn't advocate voting third party, but we may actually have a shot for once, and he has excellent policies. Jill Stein (Green Party) is a potential backup, though if West drops out, our best option for Democratic party is Marianne Williamson.

Please spread this information, especially to residents of Texas, Pennsylvania, Georgia, Arizona, Wisconsin, and Nevada. Detailed information under the cut.

Current Fascist and Republican Candidates

Donald Trump, Nikki Haley, Vivek Ramaswamy, Asa Hutchinson, Tim Scott, Ron DeSantis, Chris Christie, Ryan Binkley, and Doug Burgum.

I'm not going to entertain their details, but I will note that the information I picked up while being exposed to alt-right communities from the inside via my fascist parents earlier this year shows strong evidence that Republicans are likely going to split between Donald Trump, Ron DeSantis (viewed as a betrayal by Trump supporters), and openly fascist Robert F. Kennedy, Jr. (I'll cover him later).

My guess is a 6/3/1 Republican vote split between Trump/DeSantis/Kennedy, Jr..

Current Democratic Candidates

Joe Biden, Marianne Williamson, and Dean Philips.

Biden has overall failed to complete the majority of his campaign promises, and has been directly supporting Israel during the genocide of Palestine, as well as deferring to Republicans to be "bipartisan" (I don't think I have to stress enough that a bipartisan democrat is not a democrat) - do not vote for him.

Williamson is a high-school educated 71-year-old author from Los Angeles, California. She is known for being Oprah Winfrey's, "spiritual advisor," (double red flag), and dropped out during the 2020 election (another red flag).

While she supports the reinstatement of Roe v. Wade, the decriminalization of cannabis and psychedelic drugs, the reduction of CO2, and moving to 100% renewable energy by 2035, her advocacy for the outright banning of assault and semi-assault weapons for civilians without military reform of the same is a slight red flag when combined with her relationship with Oprah Winfrey (an Obama supporter, the president who authorized quite a lot of drone strikes in West Asia) and drop-out makes her not a great candidate.

Philips is a Bachelor's (Brown University) and Master's Business (University of Minnesota) educated 54-year-old three-term congressman who is noted for criticizing Biden running for a second term on account of both political moderacy and medical concerns.

Philips unfortunately wants to increase police funding for some reason, but advocated for better training, including mental health training. He also advocates for what he calls, "comprehensive immigration reform," in the form of increased border security and streamlining legal entry (this ignores the problem outlined by the UN that people seeking asylum are likely to have to enter a country illegally before they can seek support), and the only real good stance he has is giving reproductive rights to patients, rather than politicians.

Philips is essentially a moderate Republican, and is a bad candidate. Do not vote for him.

Current Independent Candidates

Fascist (not his stated political stance, but it's what he is)

Robert F. Kennedy, Jr. is a fascist that has openly quoted Nazi propaganda in his political campaigns, is an anti-vaccine activist, and has spread anti-science conspiracy theories such as vaccines causing autism and the non-existence of the SARS-CoV-2 pandemic. I cannot stress this enough, do not fucking vote for Kennedy, Jr.

Democratic Socialist

Cornel West is a Bachelor's (Harvard University), Master's, and Ph.D. (both Princeton University) educated 70-year-old progressive activist that switched his running party from the People's Party to the Green Party, despite being a both public- and self-described democratic socialist.

When asked why he wasn't running as a Democrat against Biden, he stated that, "Neither party is speaking to the pressing needs of poor and working people."

His party plans are a wealth tax on the rich, a national $27 minimum wage, a federal Universal Basic Income, 6 months of paid family leave, a 4-day work week, national free Pre-K childcare, "Immediate cessation of all oil and gas leasing projects on federal lands and waters," "Federal moratorium on fracking, carbon capture, and direct air capture technologies, geoengineering, and other false climate solutions," putting abortion rights in the Constitution, and nationalized healthcare.

Here's where I want to lay out something important. I normally wouldn't advocate for voting for a third party candidate due to the Spoiler Effect, but

Considering the United States' Democratic majority, popular vote records showing a common Republican minority, the absolutely incredible policies West stands for,

The growing support for third parties in the United States, and his policies aligning with public opinion,

Cornel West is the ideal candidate to vote for. Spread this information like wildfire - we may have one shot at the first third party win in US history in the upcoming 2024 election, and

If successful the dominant parties will be Fascist vs. Socialist, denying most, if not all, future Republican wins.

Our target toss-up states are Pennsylvania, Georgia, Arizona, Wisconsin, and Nevada.

Converting Texas to third party, or even just Democrat, will throw the Republican vote entirely and all but guarantee a Democrat, or hopefully third party, 2024 election win,

Which is absolutely possible, as Texas is majority Democrat and wins Republican votes via gerrymandering despite public opinion, which is why it swings occasionally.

Democrat states also need to be switched to majority third party votes, with particular emphasis on California, New York, and Illinois.

GET PEOPLE TO VOTE FOR CORNEL WEST!

Reference map of polling for the future 2024 election:

Libertarian (slightly Conservative to alt-right, really depends on the person)

Chase Oliver is a surprisingly progressive high school educated 38-year-old anti-war Libertarian that left the Democratic party after witnessing Obama's aggressive anti-West Asian war policies who has expressed desires for criminal justice reform and ending wars abroad, though hasn't elaborated on either.

Green Party

Jill Stein is a Bachelor's (Harvard University) and Medical (Harvard Medical University) 73-year-old Jewish doctor who previously ran for and represented the Green-Rainbow Party as the governor of Massachusetts.

Stein is notable for being an activist and protestor who has both protested outside buildings and testified before legislative and other government bodies against coal plants, mercury leaks, and unclean and unsafe groundwater.

Presumably, her stances will focus on environmental protections, trans rights, and Jewish protections, making her a potential alternative should West drop out.

Conclusions:

Again, don't fucking vote for Trump, Haley, Ramaswamy, Hutchinson, Scott, DeSantis, Christie, Binkley, Burgum, Biden, Philips, or Kennedy, Jr..

Our potential backup Democratic candidate is Williamson.

The ideal candidate is West, with Stein as a viable backup.

As absurd as it sounds, I want you to vote third party for Cornel West.

If you want a wealth tax on the rich, a national $27 minimum wage, a federal Universal Basic Income,

6 months of paid family leave, a 4-day work week, national free Pre-K childcare,

"Immediate cessation of all oil and gas leasing projects on federal lands and waters," "Federal moratorium on fracking, carbon capture, and direct air capture technologies, geoengineering, and other false climate solutions,"

putting abortion rights in the Constitution, and nationalized healthcare,

VOTE FOR CORNEL WEST AND GET OTHER PEOPLE TO DO THE SAME.

WE HAVE A CHANCE AT THE FIRST THIRD PARTY WIN IN THE UNITED STATES AND THE DENIAL OF FUTURE REPUBLICAN WINS.

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littlereyofsunlight · 19 days

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Willing to dance on the wire

now up on AO3

oneshot Rating: Mature Fandom: Twisters (2024) Relationships: Kate Carter/Tyler Owens Characters: Kate Carter, Tyler Owens Additional tags: sexual content, just a smidge of Kate's PTSD Summary: Kate and Tyler wait out a tornado in a storm cellar, for once.

Kate gave the radar feed on her tablet a double-take. She’d been poring over research, engrossed in the different properties of polymers similar to sodium polyacrylate that would be, in theory, less detrimental to the environment but still able to tame a tornado. Suddenly, it was three hours later than when she’d started and her stomach was grumbling. Ignoring her hunger, she took the tablet in hand, pinching to zoom in on the area over Sapulpa. “Shit,” she swore under her breath.

At the workstation across from hers, Tyler didn’t hear her, engrossed in editing yet another video for the Tornado Wranglers channel. They were alone in the barn, their unofficial headquarters, at least for the rest of the season.

Cathy was in Tulsa overnight, visiting Kate’s aunt and uncle. Lily and Boone had gone on a supply run. Javi, Dexter and Dani were out scouting for a new home base, one they could use as a proper office and accommodations during storm season, closer to the university over in Muskogee. Her mom insisted she was happy to have them at the farm, but there were at least one too few bathrooms for eight people to stay there at a time, even if the barn provided convenient storage for all their materials and half the Wranglers were willing to sleep out in the RV. Besides, Kate would be back in Muskogee with the start of the fall semester, working on her Ph.D again.

“Tyler,” Kate said, eyes still on the Doppler. No answer. He bopped his head along to whatever music they were using for this episode, olive green eyes crinkled at the edges with pleasure, lips clamped together in a smile Kate was beginning to associate with Tyler seeing something he really liked. “Tyler.” Swatting away the flicker of affection, she grabbed for something to get his attention with and ended up launching an empty soda bottle over his shoulder.

“Huh?” He clicked to pause the replay and pulled his giant headphones off of one ear. “Did you need something, Sapulpa?” She couldn’t be sure if the little flip her stomach did was nerves from the storm she was looking at or hearing him use that nickname.

Read the rest on AO3

#my fic #twisters #kate carter #tyler owens #the one where they don't chase a storm #fic: willing to dance on the wire

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void-of-unparalled-chaos · 1 year

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Okay so now that the semester is over, here is a list of actual things my paleontology professor said/did during lecture and discussion:

“I've watched this like 20 times now” (Prehistoric Planet 2 trailer)

“Hi yes I am me, an exemplar of our species. A prime specimen.”

*visible confusion while reading the Colossal website*

“Turkeys can be terrifying. Birds are terrifying in general”

“That’s David Attenbourough not a bird.”

“Thank you for clarifying.”

“You’re welcome! It’s what I’m here for! This is why I have a Ph.d!”

“You need to have a healthy bullshit meter to read any paleontology paper.”

“As I keep telling you, life hates us.”

“Look at the size of the head compared to the body. This is just stupid.”

“Look at the butt of that thing!”

*measures with hands on screen*

“This is a stupid looking animal.” (Cotylorhynchus romeri)

"for example comparing femur robustness is ... what does that even mean?"

“You can laugh…this is a stupid looking creature!”

“Then of course you have your penis worms.”

“Holding fossils from the Burgess Shale is a religious experience.”

“It would be a very mossy world, which I am not opposed to. I like moss :)”

“Taxonomy is a clusterfuck.”

“This is probably one of the most ridiculous animals to have ever evolved.” (Whales)

“It looks like a strange monster from the black lagoon.” (Maiacetus)

“It’s a magical Liopleurodon!”

*does push ups on a table to show us how a fish would have walked*

*showing us a video of a crocodile taken by someone in the water*

“Do NOT do this. Don’t jump into the water with a crocodile. It will end very badly :(“

“This was like one of the weirdest papers I’ve seen. Alright so Ken Carpenter is a very legitimate paleontologist in Colorado. He normally worked with dinosaurs but he also decided to try and figure out how mosasaurs swim. So you look at the skeleton but then you also put two undergrads in a pool, one grabbing the other one's legs to see how that double-limb locomotion would work. It's like the kookiest thing I’ve ever seen published… but yeah I'm not even sure how he got the approval for this… I don’t think this was grant funded… “I would like some undergrad volunteers to jump in a pool, one holding the other ones legs to see if they will drown.””

*rants about the size of the mosasaur in Jurassic World and debates with a student whether or not an actual size mosasaur could pull a T. Rex into the water*

“I like owls. They look like they are wearing trousers :)”

"The Ice Age movie was a missed opportunity. There were so many cool animals they could have used and they didn't use ANY of them! There were giant ground sloths that were so big you can stand in their fossilized burrows! Yeah sure we have that one guy...what's his name...Sid? Yeah sure we have Sid but Sid is NOT a giant ground sloth. That's not even mentioning all of the horses and bison and bears and lions! Its disappointing!"

...

"I was on a podcast about this :D"

#man is iconic #i love him so much #paleontology #paleomemes #college is fun #science

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landinrris · 5 days

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Fic authors self rec! When you get this, reply with your favorite five fics that you've written, then pass on to at least five other writers! Spread the self-love 💞

Oooh okay okay. I love all of my children or else they wouldn't be posted, but here are five particular favorites in no particular order:

Double Exposure- Paddock photographer Lando and Ferrari driver Carlos. I know I was harping on this one recently, but ugh, it still stands as a favorite. The way the title is both about photography and the plot... a core fic that I wrote in a few weeks.

Unconstrained- Ph.D. students Lando and Carlos do psychology. I wrote this one for a winter fic exchange for Jess. It is 100% the most self-indulgent self-projection thing I've ever written. Down to the program of study, Carlos' research interests, and the location. Another fic whose title has a double meaning to the plot. It hits so close to home that it lowkey stresses me out when I've gone back to read it.

Choosing My Confession- Witch Lando and Human Carlos. Even though it took me forever to finish, I particularly love this one because I love magical realism and I love people creating their own chosen families. I love there being some higher power but still getting to make conscious decisions. It's one I've been toying with a sequel for if I could come up with a plot, but I have some inklings.

Hide All Our Sins From the Daylight- Carlos and Lando get together in May 2023, and Carlos finds himself in a PR relationship shortly thereafter to help his contract negotiations. Yes, yes, the point has been rendered moot with Carlos off to Williams, but I stand by loving this fic. Singapore 2023 helped inform the ending so much, and I love Carlos finally getting to take his life into his own hands. On a personal level, writing the last half also helped me get through a not great extended family time, so I hold it near and dear.

Taste My Disaster (series)- When Lando and Carlos meet, Lando's an undergrad and Carlos is a master's student. They begin with a one-night stand, some life happens, and the next thing is that 8 years have passed. This is based almost completely on the movie "Sleeping With Other People," but I made it mine in my own way. When I reread the series, it still makes me emotional lowkey. It's the epitome of meeting someone initially at the wrong time and reconnecting at the right one. Plus, Part 2 is an ode to Western North Carolina, so that doesn't help the emotions 😅

#ask #writing tag

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morrieandlicky · 1 year

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Who and What Really Inspired E.M. Forster's Maurice?

(Inspiration and source for this post: "Edward Carpenter and the Double Structure of Maurice" by Robert K. Martin, Ph.D.)

WE KNOW that E.M. Forster was directly influenced by Edward Carpenter (and his life with a lower class man, George Merrill) to write the happy ending of Maurice. Forster himself was a disciple of Carpenter; specifically, he subscribed to Carpenter's belief in the "Uranian" love (love and loyalty between two men that can include a physical relationship). Forster said in the Terminal Notes of Maurice that Maurice and Alec are capable of such love and loyalty—as defined by Carpenter—between each other.

But it wasn't Carpenter who first "invented" that idea of love and loyalty; it was, in fact, Carpenter's influencer and mentor, American poet Walt Whitman.

Carpenter was a disciple of Whitman, and Forster was a disciple of Carpenter. Below, the texts from each's relevant works in chronological order will enlighten on the origin of the inspiration behind Maurice—i.e., what made the happy ending between Maurice and Alec possible, way before Forster even knew Carpenter.

—Walt Whitman in 1856: "Song of the Open Road" from Leaves of Grass

Camerado, I give you my hand! I give you my love more precious than money, I give you myself before preaching or law; Will you give me yourself? will you come travel with me? Shall we stick by each other as long as we live?

—Edward Carpenter in 1902: "Hafiz to the Cupbearer" from Towards Democracy

"Come, son (since thou hast said it), out of all Shiraz Háfiz salutes thee comrade. Let us go A spell of life along the road together."

(FYI: this poem was written by Carpenter to commemorate Merrill braving a blizzard to finally move in with him in 1898.)

—E.M. Forster in 1914 and 1932: Maurice (published in 1971)

“Did you ever dream you had a friend, Alec? Someone to last your whole life and you his." (First written in 1932.)

"They must live outside class, without relations or money; they must work and stick to each other till death. " (First written in 1914.)

"He could die for such a friend, he would allow such a friend to die for him; they would make any sacrifice for each other, and count the world nothing, neither death nor distance nor crossness could part them, because 'this is my friend.'" (First written in 1914.)

It's as if Whitman originated the idea of finding a friend who would last his whole life, and whose love is valued above class and society;

and he instilled it into Carpenter who later was able to live out that idea in real life with Merrill;

and Forster, having witnessed that idea lived out in real life through Carpenter and Merrill, wrote it into fiction so that it's lived out through Maurice and Alec—"for the ever and ever that fiction allows,” in the greenwood.

That's the very symbolic meaning of Maurice and Alec roaming the greenwood: Carpenter and Merril weren't immortal, so their love for each other obviously wouldn't last forever in that literal sense; Forster knew that, but he did what others couldn't: he immortalized their love and Whitman's idea of "Someone to last your whole life" through Maurice, so that for as long as Maurice and Alec roam the greenwood, the love between Carpenter and Merril would live on even if not in real life, and Whitman's idea would thus never die.

Whitman's philosophy is like an heirloom passed down from him to Carpenter to Forster. The connection is more in the clear if you put Forster's and Whitman's lines side by side:

"They must live outside class, without relations or money; they must work and stick to each other till death."

"I give you my love more precious than money, I give you myself before preaching or law; ... Shall we stick by each other as long as we live"

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karmic-vibes · 2 years

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The Doctor Nurse is In

one-shot inspired by this prompt, ft steve w glasses. enjoy.

cw: drug and alcohol use, vomit/general symptoms of being hungover

wc: 1.9k

Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 | Part 5

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Steve had dreamed of being a nurse for as long as he could remember. Growing up, he’d tell everyone who would listen about his aspirations, and people always told him to dream bigger.

“A smart, handsome man like you shouldn’t be a nurse. Try for doctor!”

“Have you considered getting a Ph.D instead?”

“Why nurse? It’s a job for chicks!”

Regardless of what he was told, he never listened. He stuck to his hopes and dreams, committed to four years of undergrad, and was now finishing up his clinicals.

During his rotations, he fell in love with emergency medicine, despite initially wanting to go into neurology.

Now, here he was. A fresh grad, finishing up clinicals before officially going for his R.N., and suffering through a rotating schedule, landing him doubles every other weekend.

In terms of Indiana hospitals, Hawkins Memorial was the best-of-the-best. People were shipped in from all over the state to be treated by their staff in all departments. It didn’t help that they were the only trauma hospital for miles, meaning all the chaos that went down in Indianapolis on the weekends got shipped up to them.

As Steve sat at the intake desk, completing some unfinished reports from the first half of the shift, dreaming of none other than his bed and pillow, he heard the 800-EMS radio go off. He slightly turned his head, paying half attention to it—another drunk was on their way in. He rolled his eyes, pushed his glasses further up on his nose, before resting his chin in his hand.

He began to doze off mid-report before Dr. Nancy Wheeler ran over to him, urging him into the trauma room. Steve shot up, stumbled out of his seat, and followed her down the hall.

“What’s going on?” Steve asked.

“You know that band that was performing at the Dome tonight?”

“I don’t necessarily know who they are, but yeah, I know there was a performance tonight. Why?”

“Well…” She slid open the door to find a half-conscious rockstar on the stretcher. “He’s out of his mind on god-knows-what and his agent was saying how he bit a bat during his performance.”

“What‽”

“Mhmm.”

“I… what?”

“Mmm…” The patient groaned, slowly stirring awake.

“We pushed twenty of narcan, so he’s slowly coming to.”

“You seem to have this covered… why do you need me?”

“Well, you’re babysitting him until he wakes up. Make sure he doesn’t choke on vomit or stop breathing or anything like that.”

“Uh… okay…”

“And I wanted to further prove your theory of only drunkards coming in on the weekends,” Dr. Wheeler smirked. “Call me if you need me. Security will be right outside the door. Let me know when he wakes up.”

“Can I at least go get my reports I need to finish?”

“I’ll have Joyce drop them off on her next set of vital rounds.”

“That’s not for another hour!” Steve whined.

“Watch him, Harrington. That’s an order.”

“Yes, doc,” Steve sighed, sitting in the uncomfortable hospital chair. He leaned over to glance at the patient’s bracelet. “Edward J. Munson. Well, Edward, we’re about to be buddy-buddy for the next seven hours,” Steve muttered to himself.

Steve sat back, watching the saline slowly drip in the chamber. He occasionally counted Eddie’s breaths by watching his chest rise and fall—god, he hated babysitting duty.

During Joyce’s next vitals round, she handed Steve his bundle of paperwork. He clicked his pen and continued where he left off. Joyce raised a brow at Steve before directing her attention to Edward.

“How’s he doing?” she asked.

“He’s fine—just drunk and probably high,” Steve mumbled, glaring at his papers. “Do you have the last set of vitals for room three?”

“Yeah, here.” She handed her notebook over to the boy.

“Thanks, Joycie, you’re my savior.”

“Hmm, I’m sure I am, Stevie,” she teased.

“How’s Will? Doing okay in school?” Steve asked, trying to make polite conversation.

“Yeah, he’s doing fine. Struggling a bit with making new friends.”

“Why? He’s such a sweet kid.”

“People keep teasing him, saying he’s gay, and ugh, it’s stupid.”

“I’m sorry, Joyce… that can’t be easy on him.”

“It’s okay. He’s a strong boy, he’ll make his way through it.” She sighed before taking Edward’s blood pressure. “Ready for his vitals?”

“Yes, ma’am.” Steve clicked his pen.

“Heart rate is one-twenty, blood pressure is one-ten over seventy-two, and respirations are–”

“Twelve, I know that one. Thanks, Joyce. I hope things get better with Will.”

“You and me both, sweetie. See you in two hours.”

“See ya.”

Steve poured his attention back into his mountain of paperwork for another hour or so before he heard Edward stir in his bed. He slowly blinked before muttering complete nonsense to himself.

“Morning, sunshine,” Steve said, scribbling down the time he woke up. He slid open the trauma room door and leaned against the doorframe. “Can you get Dr. Wheeler down here, please?” he asked the security guard.

“On it,” he said.

“Yer cute,” Edward chortled. He tilted his head, making it glaringly obvious he was checking out Steve’s ass in his scrubs.

“Mr. Munson–”

“Uck, so formal. Call m’Eddie,” he mumbled.

“Eddie, how’re you feeling?” Steve walked over and took his pulse.

“Better now th’I have a cute doctor to look at.”

“I’m not a doctor.”

“A nurse! Even better,” he chuckled.

“So, Eddie, do you remember what happened tonight?”

“Hehe,” he giggled to himself.

“Eddie?”

“I did some stuff.”

“What stuff?” Steve sighed in frustration.

“Drank some beer, did some drugs.”

“What kind of drugs?”

“Hmm,” he hummed.

“No judgement. What’d you take?”

“I dunno, dude,” he whined. “Will you go out with me?”

“No.”

“C’mon, cutie, go out w’me.”

“Sorry, I don’t go out with people who have rabies. It’s my best friend’s number one fear.”

“I have rabies…” Eddie‘s jaw dropped, drool pooling at the corners of his mouth. His pupils were still blown from whatever he took, and his eyes were glossed over.

“No, you don’t have rabies,” Dr. Wheeler said.

“Maybe, we’re still running some tests,” Steve added.

“You probably don’t have rabies,” she corrected. “Mr. Munson, I’m Dr. Nancy Wheeler, I’ll be your physician for the evening.”

“Why’s everyone so goddamn formal,” he scoffed. “‘m Eddie, pretty lady!”

“Yeah, you have fun with him, Stevie. Thanks for letting me know he’s awake. Let me know if anything else major happens.”

“Wait, I’m still stuck watching him‽”

“Yes, you are. Call me if anything changes.”

“Ugh,” Steve huffed, running his hands through his hair.

“You’re so mean, Steeevie,” Eddie snickered. Steve rolled his eyes before returning to his seat. “‘s okay, jokes on you, I’m very much attracted to evil.”

“I’m not evil,” Steve said.

“Whatever y’say, big boy.”

“I’m sorry?”

“Y’hear me,” Eddie hiccuped. “So why won’t you go out with me?”

“I already told you.”

“But why,” Eddie whined.

“One, you’re not sober. Two, you probably have rabies. Three, you’re my patient. It’s not happening.” Eddie started laughing. “What’s so funny?”

“Y’never said that ‘m not your type.”

“I… what?”

“I’m your type,” he teased.

“Please,” Steve scoffed, pink tinting his cheeks. “You have no idea what my type even is.”

“Yeah, I do. ‘s me.”

“Whatever you say.”

“Hmm,” Eddie hummed contently.

Steve ignored Eddie laughing to himself and went back to his paperwork. Eddie was moved to a regular E.R. treatment room shortly after, still needing Steve to babysit him. Around five in the morning, Steve managed to get all caught up on his patient care reports, and Eddie was in a deep sleep. He just had to ride out the last two dreadful hours of his shift.

Right around six, Eddie started to stir awake, moaning and groaning for something to throw up into. Steve rushed to hand him the basin on his bedside table. As Eddie spewed his insides into the pale pink bucket, Steve grabbed onto his hair, pulling it back into a bun.

“Thanks,” Eddie whimpered, spitting out some bile.

“No problem,” Steve said.

Eddie went back to heaving as Steve gently rubbed his back, trying desperately to soothe him. After five never-ending minutes, Eddie flopped onto his back, heaving, trying desperately to catch his breath.

“You okay?” Steve whispered, dampening a washcloth.

“Mm, been better,” Eddie groaned.

“C’mere.”

Steve gently held his chin in his hands as he cleaned up the vomit from the rockstar’s face. Eddie faintly smiled at him as a silent token of gratitude.

“Thanks…”

“Mhmm.”

Steve picked up the basin and threw it into the biohazard bin before removing his gloves and washing his hands. He ripped a few paper towels from the machine and leaned onto the counter.

“How’re you feeling?”

“Like shit.”

“Mm, I’m sure. Wanna tell me what you took last night?”

“Lord, I dunno. Some coke, some molly, and a joint… maybe two.”

“Fun night?”

“You could say that,” Eddie smirked.

“Do you know if the weed was laced with anything?”

“I know one had traces of fent or morphine. I dunno which one.”

“That explains why the narcan worked,” Steve sighed. “And to drink?”

“Dude, I dunno, I lost count. A lot.”

“And the bat?”

“That what?” Eddie mumbled.

“People said you bit into a bat.”

“Who the fuck told you that?”

“The doctor I work under and your manager-agent person.”

“No, I didn’t bite into a fucking bat. I’m sure I said I did, but I was so high, nothing I was saying was true.”

“Gotcha…”

Steve took a deep sigh as the words rang in his ears.

Nothing I was saying was true.

Did he not think Steve was cute? Did he not want to go out with Steve? Sure, Steve shot him down each time, but for once—since high school—someone found him desirable. He felt wanted.

Eddie quickly pulled Steve out of his thoughts by snapping and waving in his face.

“Hello?” Eddie raised a brow. “Earth to Stevie?”

“Yeah, sorry, what?”

“Nothing, you just zoned. Can I get some water?”

“Oh, yeah, sure. You want ice too?”

“Ice would be nice,” he smiled.

“I’ll be right back.”

Steve finished out his shift, handed care of Eddie over to the next person doing their clinical rotation and went home to his sweet, sweet bed. Two days later, he was back in the hospital for his next set of shifts—this time, however, they were during the week and during the day.

He had never been more relieved.

No more drunkards. No more babysitting. No more Eddie.

When his shift ended that fateful Wednesday night, he made his way out to his car to find a familiar face leaning against the driver’s side door, puffing away at a cigarette.

“Hey!” He cheered, throwing his cigarette to the asphalt.

“Uh… hi? Wh-What are you doing here, Eddie?”

“I wanted to apologize and say thanks… y’know, for Sunday night.”

“Oh, it was no problem. Literally just my job.” Steve nodded and stuck his hands in his scrub pockets.

“Can I buy you a drink? Just as a thank you—i-it doesn’t need to mean anything.”

“Y’know, a drink right now sounds lovely. Lead the way, Munson.”

“My pleasure, big boy.” Steve froze in his tracks, staring blankly at Eddie. “Don’t think I forgot everything from last night, Stevie.” He winked before opening the passenger door to his jet-black corvette for Steve. “After you, cutie.”

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taglist: @steviesbicrisis

a/n: may make a part two. not too sure yet. anyways, hope y’all enjoyed!

#eddie munson #steve harrington #stranger things #eddie st4 #eddie stranger things #gay #st4 #lgbtq #lgbt pride #steddie #joe kerry #joseph quinn #joyce byers #winona ryder #will byers #noah schnapp #netflix #nurse Steve Harrington #rockstar eddie munson

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religion-is-a-mental-illness · 6 months

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By: Alex Byrne

Published: Mar 14, 2024

“Computing is not binary” would be a silly slogan—binary computer code underpins almost every aspect of modern life. But other kinds of binaries are decidedly out of fashion, particularly where sex is concerned. “Biology is not binary” declares the title of an essay in the March/April issue of American Scientist, a magazine published by Sigma Xi, the science and engineering honor society. Sigma Xi has a storied history, with numerous Nobel-prize-winning members, including the DNA-unravellers Francis Crick and James Watson, and more recently Jennifer Doudna, for her work on CRISPR/Cas9 genome editing. The essay is well-worth critical examination, not least because it efficiently packs so much confusion into such a short space.

Another reason for examining it is the pedigree of the authors—Kate Clancy, Agustín Fuentes, Caroline VanSickle, and Catherine Clune-Taylor. Clancy is a professor of anthropology at the University of Illinois, Urbana-Champaign; Fuentes is a professor of anthropology at Princeton, and Clune-Taylor is an assistant professor of gender and sexuality studies at that university; VanSickle is an associate professor of anatomy at Des Moines. Clancy’s Ph.D. is from Yale, Fuentes’ is from UC Berkeley, and VanSickles’ is from Michigan. Clune-Taylor is the sole humanist: she has a Ph.D. in philosophy from Alberta, with Judith Butler as her external examiner. In short, the authors are not ill-educated crackpots or dogmatic activists, but top-drawer scholars. Their opinions matter.

Let’s talk about sex, baby

Before wading into the essay’s arguments, let’s look at the context, as noted in the second paragraph. “Last fall,” the authors write, “the American Anthropological Association made headlines after removing a session on sex and gender from its November 2023 annual conference.” The session’s cancellation was covered by the New York Times as well as international newspapers, and it eventually took place under the auspices of Heterodox Academy. (You can watch the entire event here.) Scheduled for the Sunday afternoon “dead zone” of the five-day conference, when many attendees leave for the airport, the title was “Let’s Talk About Sex, Baby: Why biological sex remains a necessary analytic category in anthropology.” The lineup was all-female, and included the anthropologists Kathleen Lowrey and Elizabeth Weiss. According to the session description, “With research foci from hominin evolution to contemporary artificial intelligence, from the anthropology of education to the debates within contemporary feminism about surrogacy, panelists make the case that while not all anthropologists need to talk about sex, baby, some absolutely do.”

Nothing evidently objectionable here, so why was it cancelled? The official letter announcing that the session had been removed from the program, signed by the presidents of the AAA and CASCA (the Canadian Anthropology Society), explained:

The reason the session deserved further scrutiny was that the ideas were advanced in such a way as to cause harm to members represented by the Trans and LGBTQI of the anthropological community as well as the community at large.

Why “the Trans” were double-counted (the T in LGBTQI) was not clear. And although ideas can harm, a handful of academics speaking in the Toronto Convention Centre are unlikely to cause much. In any event, the authors of “Biology is not binary” seem to think that the panelists’ errors about sex warranted the cancellation, not the trauma their words would bring to vulnerable anthropologists. “We were glad,” they say, “to see the American Anthropological Association course-correct given the inaccuracy of the panelists’ arguments.”

Never mind that no-one had heard the panelists’ arguments—what were these “inaccuracies”? The panelists, Clancy and her co-authors report, had claimed that “sex is binary,” and that “male and female represent an inflexible and infallible pair of categories describing all humans.”

“Biology is not binary” is not off to a promising start. Only one of the cancelled panelists, Weiss, has said anything about sex being binary in her talk abstract, and even that was nuanced: “skeletons are binary; people may not be.” No one had claimed that the two sex categories were “inflexible” or “infallible,” which anyway doesn’t make sense. (This is one example of the essay’s frequent unclarity of expression.) Neither had anyone claimed that every single human falls into one sex category or the other.

Probably the real reason the proposed panel caused such a stir was that it was perceived (in Clancy et al.’s own words) as “part of an intentional gender-critical agenda.” And, to be fair, some of the talks were “gender-critical,” for instance Silvia Carrasco’s. (Carrasco’s views have made her a target of activists at her university in Barcelona.) Still, academics can’t credibly cancel a conference session simply because a speaker defends ideas that bother some people, hence the trumped-up charges of harm and scientific error.

Although Clancy et al. misleadingly characterize the content of the cancelled AAA session, their essay might yet get something important right. They argue for four main claims. First, “sex is not binary.” Second, “sex is culturally constructed.” Third, “defining sex is difficult.” And, fourth, there is no one all-purpose definition of sex—it depends “on what organism is being studied and what question is being asked.”

Let’s go through these in order.

“Sex is not binary”

When people say that sex is binary, they sometimes mean that there are exactly two sexes, male and female. Sometimes they mean something else: the male/female division cuts humanity into two non-overlapping groups. That is, every human is either male (and not female), or female (and not male). These two interpretations of “Sex is binary” are different. Perhaps there are exactly two sexes, but there are some humans who are neither male nor female, or who are both sexes simultaneously. In that scenario, sex is binary according to the first interpretation, but not binary according to the second. Which of the two interpretations do Clancy et al. have in mind?

At least the essay is clear on this point. The “Quick Take” box on the first page tells us that the (false) binary thesis is that “male and female [are] the only two possible sex categories.” And in the text the authors say that “plenty of evidence has emerged to reject” the hypothesis that “there are only two sexes.” (Here they mystifyingly add “…and that they are discrete and different.” Obviously if there are two sexes then they are different.)

If there are not exactly two sexes, then the number of sexes is either zero, one, or greater than two. Since Clancy et al. admit that “categories such as ‘male’ and ‘female’…can be useful,” they must go for the third option: there are more than two sexes. But how many? Three? 97? In a striking absence of curiosity, the authors never say.

In any case, what reason do Clancy et al. give for thinking that the number of sexes is at least three? The argument is in this passage:

[D]ifferent [“sex-defining”] traits also do not always line up in a person’s body. For example, a human can be born with XY chromosomes and a vagina, or have ovaries while producing lots of testosterone. These variations, collectively known as intersex, may be less common, but they remain a consistent and expected part of human biology. So the idea that there are only two sexes…[has] plenty of evidence [against it].

However, this reasoning is fallacious. The premise is that some (“intersex”) people do not have enough of the “sex-defining” traits to be either male or female. The conclusion is that there are more than two sexes. The conclusion only follows if we add an extra premise, that these intersex people are not just neither male nor female, but another sex. And Clancy et al. do nothing to show that intersex people are another sex.

What’s more, it is quite implausible that any of them are another sex. Whatever the sexes are, they are reproductive categories. People with the variations noted by Clancy et al. are either infertile, for example those with Complete Androgen Insensitivity Syndrome (CAIS) (“XY chromosomes and a vagina”), or else fertile in the usual manner, for example many with Congenital Adrenal Hyperplasia (CAH) and XX chromosomes (“ovaries while producing lots of testosterone,” as Clancy et al. imprecisely put it). One study reported normal pregnancy rates among XX CAH individuals. Unsurprisingly, the medical literature classifies these people as female. Unlike those with CAIS and CAH, people who belonged to a genuine “third sex” would make their own special contribution to reproduction.

“Sex is culturally constructed”

“Biology is not binary” fails to establish that there are more than two sexes. Still, the news that sex is “culturally constructed” sounds pretty exciting. How do Clancy et al. argue for that?

There is a prior problem. Nowhere do Clancy et al. say what “Sex is culturally constructed” means. What’s more, the essay thoroughly conflates the issue of the number of sexes with the issue about cultural construction. Whatever “cultural construction” means, presumably culture could “construct” two sexes. (The Buddhas of Bamiyan in Afghanistan were literally constructed, and there were exactly two of them.) Conversely, the discovery of an extra sex would not show that sex was culturally constructed, any more than the discovery of an extra flavor of quark would show that fundamental particles are culturally constructed.

Clancy et al. drop a hint at the start of the section titled “Sex is Culturally Constructed.” “Definitions and signifiers of gender,” they say, “differ across cultures… but sex is often viewed as a static, universal truth.” (If you want to know what they mean by “gender,” you’re out of luck.) That suggests that the cultural construction of sex amounts to the “definitions and signifiers” of sex differing between times and places. This is confirmed by the following passage: “[T]here is another way we can see that sex is culturally constructed: The ways collections of traits are interpreted as sex can and have differed across time and cultures.” What’s more, in an article called “Is sex socially constructed?”, Clune-Taylor says that this (or something close to it) is one sense in which sex is socially constructed (i.e. culturally constructed).

The problem here is that “Sex is culturally constructed” (as Clancy et al. apparently understand “cultural construction”) is almost trivially true, and not denied by anyone. If “X is culturally constructed” means something like “Ideas of X and theories of X change between times and places,” then almost anything which has preoccupied humans will be culturally constructed. Mars, Jupiter and Saturn are culturally constructed: the ancients thought they revolved around the Earth and represented different gods. Dinosaurs are culturally constructed: our ideas of them are constantly changing, and are influenced by politics as well as new scientific discoveries. Likewise, sex is culturally constructed: Aristotle thought that in reproduction male semen produces a new embryo from female menstrual blood, as “a bed comes into being from the carpenter and the wood.” We now have a different theory.

Naturally one must distinguish the claim that dinosaurs are changing (they used to be covered only in scales, now they have feathers) from the claim that our ideas of dinosaurs are changing (we used to think that dinosaurs only have scales, now we think they have feathers). It would be fallacious to move from the premise that dinosaurs are culturally constructed (in Clancy et al.’s sense) to the conclusion that dinosaurs themselves have changed, or that there are no “static, universal truths” about dinosaurs. It would be equally fallacious to move from the premise that sex is culturally constructed to the claim that there are no “static, universal truths” about sex. (One such truth, for example, is that there are two sexes.) Nonetheless, Clancy et al. seem to commit exactly this fallacy, in denying (as they put it) that “sex is…a static, universal truth.”

To pile falsity on top of fallacy, when Clancy et al. give an example of how our ideas about sex have changed, their choice could hardly be more misleading. According to them:

The prevailing theory from classical times into the 19th century was that there is only one sex. According to this model, the only true sex is male, and females are inverted, imperfect distortions of males.

This historical account was famously defended in a 1990 book, Making Sex, by the UC Berkeley historian Thomas Laqueur. What Clancy et al. don’t tell us is that Laqueur’s history has come under heavy criticism; in particular, it is politely eviscerated at length in The One-Sex Body on Trial, by the classicist Helen King. It is apparent from Clune-Taylor’s other work that she knows of King’s book, which makes Clancy et al.’s unqualified assertion of Laqueur’s account even more puzzling.

“Defining sex is difficult”

Aristotle knew there were two sexes without having a satisfactory definition of what it is to be male or female. The question of how to define sex (equivalently, what sex is) should be separated from the question of whether sex is binary. So even if Clancy et al. are wrong about the number of sexes, they might yet be right that sex is difficult to define.

Why do they think it is difficult to define? Here’s their reason:

There are many factors that define sex, including chromosomes, hormones, gonads, genitalia, and gametes (reproductive cells). But with so many variables, and so much variation within each variable, it is difficult to pin down one definition of sex.

Readers of Reality’s Last Stand will be familiar with the fact that chromosomes and hormones (for example) do not define sex. The sex-changing Asian sheepshead wrasse does not change its chromosomes. Interestingly, the sex hormones (androgens and estrogens) are found in plants, although they do not appear to function as hormones. How could the over-educated authors have written that “there are many factors that define sex,” without a single one of them objecting?

That question is particularly salient because the textbook account of sex is in Clancy et al.’s very own bibliography. In the biologist Joan Roughgarden’s Evolution’s Rainbow there’s a section called “Male and Female Defined.” If you crack the book open, you can’t miss it.

Roughgarden writes:

To a biologist, “male” means making small gametes, and “female” means making large gametes. Period! By definition, the smaller of the two gametes is called a sperm, and the larger an egg. Beyond gamete size, biologists don’t recognize any other universal difference between male and female.

“Making” does not mean currently producing, but (something like) has the function to make. Surely one of Clancy et al. must have read Roughgarden’s book! (Again from her other work we know that Clune-Taylor has.) To avoid going round and round this depressing mulberry bush again, let’s leave it here.

“Sex is defined in a lot of ways in science”

Perhaps sex is not a single thing, and there are different definitions for the different kinds of sex. The standard gamete-definition of sex is useful for some purposes; other researchers will find one of the alternative definitions more productive. Clancy et al. might endorse this conciliatory position. They certainly think that a multiplicity of definitions is good scientific practice: “In science, how sex is defined for a particular study is based on what organism is being studied and what question is being asked.”

Leaving aside whether this fits actual practice, as a recommendation it is wrong-headed. Research needs to be readily compared and combined. A review paper on sexual selection might draw on studies of very different species, each asking different questions. If the definition of sex (male and female) changes between studies, then synthesizing the data would be fraught with complications and potential errors, because one study is about males/females-in-sense-1, another is about males/females-in-sense-2, and so on.

Indeed, “Biology is not binary” itself shows that the authors don’t really believe that “male” and “female” are used in science with multiple senses. They freely use “sex,” “male,” and “female” without pausing to disambiguate, or explain just which of the many alleged senses of these words they have in mind. If “sex is defined a lot of ways in science” then the reader should wonder what Clancy et al. are talking about.

In an especially odd passage, they write that the “criteria for defining sex will differ in studies of mushrooms, orangutans, and humans.” That is sort-of-true for mushrooms, which mate using mating types, not sperm and eggs. (Mating types are sometimes called “sexes,” but sometimes not.) However, it’s patently untrue for orangutans and humans, as the biologist Jerry Coyne points out.

Orangutans had featured earlier in the saga of the AAA cancellation, when Clancy and Fuentes had bizarrely suggested that the “three forms of the adult orangutan” present a challenge to the “sex binary,” seemingly forgetting that these three forms comprise females and two kinds of males. Kathleen Lowrey had some fun at their expense.

As if this tissue of confusion isn’t enough, Clancy et al. take one final plunge off the deep end. After mentioning osteoporosis in postmenopausal women, they write:

[P]eople experiencing similar sex-related conditions may not always fit in the same sex category. Consider polycystic ovary syndrome (PCOS), a common metabolic condition affecting about 8 to 13 percent of those with ovaries, which often causes them to produce more androgens than those without this condition. There are increasing numbers of people with PCOS who self-define as intersex, whereas others identify as female.

They seem to believe that two people with PCOS might not “fit in the same sex category.” That is, one person could be female while the other isn’t, with this alchemy accomplished by “self-definition.” PCOS, in case you were wondering, is a condition that only affects females or, in the approved lingo of the Cleveland Clinic, “people assigned female at birth.”

How could four accomplished and qualified professors produce such—not to mince words—unadulterated rubbish?

There are many social incentives these days for denouncing the sex binary, and academics—even those at the finest universities—are no more resistant to their pressure than anyone else. However, unlike those outside the ivory tower, academics have a powerful arsenal of carefully curated sources and learned jargon, as well as credentials and authority. They may deploy their weapons in the service of—as they see it—equity and inclusion for all.

It would be “bad science,” Clancy et al. write at the end, to “ignore and exclude” “individuals who are part of nature.” In this case, though, Clancy et al.’s firepower is directed at established facts, and the collateral damage may well include those people they most want to help.

About the Author

Alex Byrne is a Professor of Philosophy at the Massachusetts Institute of Technology (MIT) in the Department of Linguistics and Philosophy. His main interests are philosophy of mind (especially perception), metaphysics (especially color) and epistemology (especially self-knowledge). A few years ago, Byrne started working on philosophical issues relating to sex and gender. His book on these topics, Trouble with Gender: Sex Facts, Gender Fictions, is now available in the US and UK.

The whole "social construction," "cultural construction" thing is idiotic.

Not only does it mean you would be a different sex in a different society/culture, but it becomes necessary that cross-cultural/cross-societal reproduction is fraught with complications.

#Alex Byrne #sex pseudoscience #pseudoscience #sex denialism #biological sex #reproduction #biology #human reproduction #queer theory #religion is a mental illness

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shamandrummer · 8 months

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Healing with Acoustic Resonance

Drumming is a profound way to promote healing. Through acoustic resonance, drumming helps restore the vibrational integrity of body, mind, and spirit. Acoustic resonance is the ability of a sound wave to impart its energy to a substance such as air, wood, metal, or the human body, making it vibrate in sympathy. For example, when you tap a tuning fork in proximity to another one of the same tone, both will vibrate. Acoustic resonance is an important consideration for instrument builders, as most acoustic instruments use resonators, such as the strings and body of a violin, the length of tube in a flute, and the shape of a drum membrane. A single-headed frame or hoop drum works best for acoustic resonance healing--the larger the drum, the greater the resonance.

The drum is a powerful tool for healing. As we play the drum, the drum then plays our bodies. The various frequencies of the drum interact with our own resonant frequencies, forming new harmonic alignments. Through the natural law of resonance, the sound waves produced by the drum impart their energy to the resonating systems of the body, mind and spirit, making them vibrate in sympathy. When we drum, our living flesh, brainwaves and spiritual energy centers entrain or synchronize to the sound waves and rhythms. This sympathetic resonance has the following key effects:

It produces deeper self-awareness by inducing synchronous brain activity. Research has demonstrated that the physical transmission of rhythmic energy to the brain synchronizes the two cerebral hemispheres. When the logical left hemisphere and the intuitive right hemisphere begin to pulsate in harmony, the inner guidance of intuitive knowing can then flow unimpeded into conscious awareness. The ability to access unconscious information through symbols and imagery facilitates psychological integration and a reintegration of self. Drumming also synchronizes the frontal and lower areas of the brain, integrating nonverbal information from lower brain structures into the frontal cortex, producing feelings of insight, understanding, integration, certainty, conviction, and truth, which surpass ordinary understandings and tend to persist long after the experience, often providing foundational insights for religious and cultural traditions.

It releases negative feelings, blockages, and emotional trauma. Drumming can help people express and address emotional issues. Unexpressed feelings and emotions can form energy blockages. The physical stimulation of drumming removes blockages and produces emotional release. Sound vibrations resonate through every cell in the body, stimulating the release of negative cellular memories.

It accesses the entire brain. The reason rhythm is such a powerful tool is that it permeates the entire brain. Vision for example is in one part of the brain, speech another, but acoustic resonance penetrates the whole brain. The sound of drumming generates dynamic neuronal connections in all parts of the brain even where there is significant damage or impairment such as in Attention Deficit Disorder (ADD). According to Michael Thaut, director of Colorado State University's Center for Biomedical Research in Music, "Rhythmic cues can help retrain the brain after a stroke or other neurological impairment, as with Parkinson’s patients…." The more connections that can be made within the brain, the more integrated our experiences become.

It induces natural altered states of consciousness. Rhythmic drumming induces altered states, which have a wide range of therapeutic applications. A landmark study by Barry Quinn, Ph.D. demonstrates that even a brief drumming session can double alpha brain wave activity, dramatically reducing stress. The brain changes from Beta waves (focused concentration and activity) to Alpha waves (calm and relaxed), producing feelings of euphoria and well-being. Alpha activity is associated with meditation, shamanic trance, and integrative modes of consciousness.

It helps us to experience being in resonance with the natural rhythms of life. Rhythm and resonance order the natural world. Dissonance and disharmony arise only when we limit our capacity to resonate totally and completely with the rhythms of life. The origin of the word rhythm is Greek meaning "to flow." We can learn to flow with the rhythms of life by simply learning to feel the beat, pulse, or groove while drumming. When drummers feel this rhythmic flow, especially at a slower, steady beat, they can shift into a state of deep relaxation and expanded awareness. It is a way of bringing the essential self into accord with the flow of a dynamic, interrelated universe, helping us feel connected rather than isolated and estranged.

#shamanic drumming #drumming #shamanic practice #shamanism #consciousness #shamanic healing #altered states #resonance #sound healing

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teaberrii · 1 year

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Chapter 12: A Date with the Doppelgänger

You've been Cupid for as long as you can remember. You've brought countless soulmates together, yet you've never found love.

When you're assigned to bring two childhood friends back together, it should be simple until you unexpectedly catch feelings for the mysterious and cold Ph.D. student, Dan Heng, the man with a soulmate… the man with answers to your past.

Dan Heng/You

Chapter warnings: Please be advised that there's a very brief scene on nonconsensual sexual touching and mentions of minors doing drugs. It's not as scary as it sounds, I promise lol

Notes:

Cross-posted on Ao3

Female reader

Chapter index at the end of chapter one

Young had always been fascinated with magic. But it wasn't just his interest that motivated him to learn more; he also had an ulterior motive: to impress the human girl he'd grown to love. You'd saved him that day, and despite being from two different worlds, he still remembered the words you said to him not long after he returned the favour by hiding you from those guards who had been looking for you.

“So what if we’re different?” you had asked. “I saved you. You saved me. We’re equal.”

He’d been told by many of his kind that humans and creatures like them were not equals. Humans considered themselves superior, and anyone different would be treated as inferior. Young had never met a human until you, but you defied the stereotypes in your words and actions.

“How do you know it’s poisonous?” Young, a teenager, was looking at an oddly coloured mushroom on the forest floor.

You whipped out a knife and cut it from the rest. Young stared in horror. Didn’t you just say that it was poisonous? As if reading his mind, you smiled. “It’s not going to kill you if you touch it.”

You held it to the light and gestured for him to come closer. Young moved closer to you, but before looking at the mushroom, he glanced at you. He’d seen other human girls but none had ever caught his attention. Not in the way you had. They were pretty, but not as pretty as you.

“Do you see how the spots change colour?” you asked, leaning closer to him.

Young’s heart unexpectedly raced. “Yeah."

“This means it’s not dangerous to the skin.”

When you moved away, Young exhaled softly, and he can finally think rationally again. “How do you know so much about—”

“Strangely coloured mushrooms?”

Young chuckled. “Well, just plants in general.”

It was recently that you started teaching Young all about poisonous plants during your secret rendezvous. Sometimes, you jokingly quizzed him to make sure he was listening. When he would respond with more details than normal, you started increasing the difficulty. Yet, he always got your questions right, which surprised but impressed you.

“Because there’s really nothing else to do around here,” you said. You jabbed a finger at his chest. “You’re lucky you’re a guy, you know that? You get to do all these cool things and get to go on fun adventures. All women are allowed to do are menial tasks. It’s boring and”—you made a slightly disgusted face—“not my style.”

“So, you study?”

“Yes. My brother is also a doctor. I also learn from him sometimes.”

“Well, since you taught me so much, I should return the favour.”

You gasped. “Are you finally going to let me touch your tail?”

“No.”

You pouted, and Young almost smiled. “I’ll teach you a thing or two about magic.”

As the years went by, Young’s interest and knowledge in magic grew, but researchers and scholars had warned everyone about black magic, magic that involved curses, death, and even the afterlife. It was a form of forbidden magic that was like a double-edged sword. He had told you about it and warned you about its dangers.

The last person he thought he would come across experimenting with black magic was his mother.

“Mother?”

An older woman spun around at the sound of her son’s voice. Unable to stand the stench of blood in the blood, Young had his hanfu sleeve covering half of his face.

“What are you doing here?” She walked up to him as if to prevent him from seeing whatever she was… brewing. He didn't answer her but tried to look past her, so his mother quickly said, “Why don’t you go see your father?”

But Young wasn’t having it. “What are you doing?” He crossed his arms. “Does Father know that you’re messing with black magic?”

“This isn’t your concern, Young.”

Young was baffled that his mother would say such a thing. Of course, it was his concern. She was his mother. Why would he want her messing with black magic? Why was she in the first place?

“I promise I’ll be careful.”

“That’s not helpful,” Young said, frowning. “What are you trying to do?”

“You’re still too young to understand.”

“That’s an excuse.”

His mother’s gaze hardened. “Leave, Young. Now."

Young didn’t want to, but he knew his mother wouldn’t take no for an answer. He turned around and walked toward the door, knowing well that his mother kept her eyes on him. No one messed with dark magic not even for good reasons. He knew that. His mother knew that. So, what was she hiding?

Dan Heng opens his eyes and sees the familiar white ceiling of his room. What in the world was that dream? He didn’t just dream about Young. He was Young. Dan Heng felt the same emotions Young had. How fast his heart raced when he was with you. How anxious and suspicious he felt when he was with his mother. He and Young look alike, but their similarities stop there, right?

Dan Heng was the doppelganger, but was it possible his mother was connected to Young’s mother somehow? Dan Heng’s parents had their problems, but they always came around somehow. However, when their fights escalated, they started living apart for a while. That was when Dan Heng's mother became infected with The Withering. But what about Young’s mother? Did she have marital problems? Was that why she was messing with black magic?

Was she the one who created The Withering?

He gets out of bed and heads to the washroom. After washing his face, he turns off the tap and looks in the mirror, not expecting to see someone else’s reflection. The man looked like him. A lot like him. But he had horns, and his ears resemble an elf’s.

It was Young.

Dan Heng closes his eyes and dries his face with a towel. When he looks back, his reflection is back. Is it possible he and Young aren’t doppelgangers, but they’re the same person in two different periods? No. That can't be. Young was executed. And the past is the past. Right?

As Dan Heng muses over his thoughts, he returns to his room and hears his phone buzz with a message. When he sees the name on the screen, he smiles.

Cupid: Hi. Do you want to hang out today?

He'll never forget the look on your face when he asked if he could call you his girlfriend. Stunned. Your mouth opened and closed as if trying to find the right words.

“So… You want to fake date to get out of fake dating?”

Dan Heng almost facepalmed, but he could understand your logic. He didn’t want to pretend to date Stelle, so he hoped he could say you were his girlfriend just to get his father off his back. It didn't mean you had to date. Everything was just for show.

Dan Heng could’ve said yes, but instead, he said, “No.” He took your hand and pulled you a little closer. “I want to be yours. For real.”

Your eyes had widened, but your face had turned red. “W-Wait a minute. But—”

“I know you said I have a soulmate, but she's not the one I want,” Dan Heng said. “You made yourself clear where you stand in terms of love and relationships that time we talked at the restaurant, but I don’t want to regret not saying anything.” He smiled reassuringly. “You don’t have to give me an answer right now.”

Is this a step in the right direction? Are you asking him on a date?

Back at your apartment, you’re sitting on your bed, staring at your phone for a response.

After the dream with Young, you couldn’t fall back asleep. But what surprised you was that you weren’t only thinking about Young. You also thought about Dan Heng. They were doppelgangers, but could it be possible they were the same person? You remembered how your heart raced when Dan Heng asked you to be his girlfriend despite the circumstances. Then, you remembered Young’s words from your dream.

“I should’ve told you much sooner… I should’ve asked you to be mine.”

Was fate giving you another chance? A chance… to be with Young in another time and place? The thought seemed too good to be true. You had walked to your table and picked up the locket. Opening the locket would set Young free. What did that mean?

You eventually fell back asleep, but this time… you dreamt about Dan Heng, and it left your heart warm and full the next morning. You wanted to see him which brought you to your current situation.

Dan Heng: Let’s go.

You smile as you drop your phone to get ready.

Dan Heng spent the night at his father’s place, but he still had some extra clothes in his old bedroom. He picks out a casual black turtleneck, a white jacket, grey pants, and a black belt. Of course, he doesn’t forget to accessorize with an onyx necklace and two bracelets on his left wrist. He’s fixing his shirt in the mirror when a knock comes at the door.

“Come in.”

Agnes opens the door and quietly gasps when she sees Dan Heng all dressed up. “Going somewhere, Master Dan Heng?” Dan Heng turns to her, and she says, “Oh, no titles. Right.” She looks him up and down. “Are you… going on a date, perhaps?”

“I’d like to think so.”

Agnes beams. “Is it the pretty girl from yesterday night? The one who was treating your burn?”

“Yes.”

She claps her hands together. “Where are you taking the young gal?”

There are a lot of places to pick from. It’s Xianzhou, the city that never sleeps. But he wants this to be the perfect date. It’s his one chance to impress you and change your mind about your stance on love, even though he didn’t think much about it before he met you.

“Ah, young love,” Agnes says dreamily. “Reminds me of how romantic my husband and I were back in the day!”

“Do you…” Dan Heng awkwardly looks away, “...have any advice?”

Agnes chuckles. “Oh, you’ll be fine, Mas”—she coughs—“Dan Heng! With someone as good-looking as you, you should’ve been taken years ago.” She's about to leave but quickly turns back. "Are you still going to have breakfast?”

Dan Heng nods and follows her out of his room.

Back at your place, Pom yawns and stretches as he makes his way toward the bathroom but stops when he notices you putting up outfits in front of your closet mirror. You look a little conflicted. You’re about to hold up another shirt when you notice Pom leaning against your doorframe. He’s smiling at you as if he knows what’s up.

“Whatcha doing?”

You avoid his eyes. “Cleaning."

"Cleaning?" Pom asks if he can't believe what he just heard. "I know you, Cupid. You're too lazy to clean."

"Well, excuse me, Pom."

Pom raises his hands in defence as he walks in. "Just saying the facts." You hold up another outfit to the mirror. "It must be important if you’re thinking this hard about what to wear.” He smiles slyly. “Does it happen to involve a dashing young man who may or may not be your”—he gasps—"soulmate?”

“Very funny."

“You’re going on a date.” Pom has a wide grin. “Cupid’s going on a date!”

“We’re just hanging out!”

“Without anyone else.”

You frown as you watch him pick up a few of your clothes and puts them over you as if you’re his model. “Don’t you have something better to do?”

Pom puts down the clothes and sees the locket around your neck. “Have you figured out how to open that thing yet?”

You glance down and sigh. “No, not yet… But, I had another dream yesterday.”

“About Young?”

You nod. “Dan Heng was right. Young and I… we were lovers.”

“You… don’t look too happy.”

You toss your clothes on the bed. “What I dreamt about… it was supposed to be a happy"—you blush as the feelings come rushing back—"or euphoric moment, but after I woke up, it was like… it was like I lost everything.”

“And you don’t know why.”

You look down. “Do you remember Dan Heng telling us that Lan told him Young was executed?”

Pom nods. “Wait. Don’t tell me you blame yourself, right?”

“Believe it or not… I don’t think my relationship with him had anything to do with that.”

“Was there something else?”

“I was a King’s daughter,” you begin, and Pom’s eyes widen. “Yeah, believe it or not.”

“So… does this mean I have to call you Princess Cupid from now on?”

You almost shiver. “Please don't.” Pom smiles. “Anyway, even though I was supposedly a princess, women weren’t particularly valued back then. I was supposed to get married, and—”

“To who?”

“...Jing Yuan.”

“What?”

“Just let me finish, Pom!” After telling Pom about most of your dream, you say, “Jing Yuan was using me as an accessory. We were getting married just for show. I’m just speculating, but the only reason I can think of was that he wanted to take over the North Kingdom.”

Pom puts a hand on his forehead. “This is too much for just one night."

“Yeah, you’re telling me.”

“Okay, assuming Jing Yuan was some evil douchebag who wanted to take over the world... if he found out about your relationship with Young, he could use it as an excuse to, well”—Pom pretends to slice his neck with his hand—“off him, right?” Pom stands and grabs a hanger and points it at you. “How dare you touch my wife!”

You take the hanger with a deadpan look and toss it in your pile of clothes. "He could, and he probably did. But Young was the heir to the Middle Kingdom.”

“Middle Kingdom? Do we have a South or a Bottom Kingdom now?”

“Take a guess.”

“Geez. I wasn’t expecting a history lesson.”

“There are only three Kingdoms you have to remember, Pom. North, Middle, and South.”

“South sounds better than Bottom if I’m being honest.”

“Focus.” Pom’s expression turns serious again. “Anyway, Jing Yuan was just a general, a commanding general sure, but he wasn’t a king or of loyalty. We were going to marry, but that didn’t mean he would automatically take my father’s spot as King. And… if he did execute Young, he would be starting a war.”

Pom nods in understanding. “I see.”

“Jing Yuan was the man I saw at the festival. Remember what I told you about what he said?”

“...That you started a war?”

You sigh. "It still doesn't make sense."

Pom stands and puts his hands on your shoulders. “We still have missing pieces. And, whatever we find, I’m on your side, Cupid.”

You scoff with a slight smile. “Didn't think you'd be the mushy type, Pom."

“I’d love to take a trip down memory lane about our beautiful friendship together, but I don’t want to ruin your probably one chance at finding love.”

You look at the time and almost gasp. It’s almost time for you to meet Dan Heng, and you still haven’t changed out of your PJs.

Pom tosses you a blouse and high-waisted shorts. “Just wear this!”

“This is see-through.”

Pom looks at you as if he doesn’t see your point. “Then, wear some cute lingerie.” You give him a deadpan look as you toss the blouse back at him. He catches it and puts it on the bed. “I assume you have none.” Your jaw almost drops but then Pom tosses you a casual shirt. “Chop, chop! Don’t keep the man waiting.”

You wait for Pom to leave your room and close the door before you get changed. When you come out, your hair is brushed and you’d put on some natural makeup. You’d tied a front shirt knot. Coupled with the high-waisted shorts you wore, the overall outfit emphasizes your nice figure.

Just before you head out the door with your small bag, Pom says, “Oh, wait.” You turn around, and you see Pom looking at the pendant around your neck. “Could I… take a look at that while you’re gone?”

You glance at the locket. “Young’s necklace?”

Pom nods. Truth be told, he also had a dream yesterday night. But it wasn’t of you or Young but the locket. Pom thinks about telling you, but he doesn’t want it to plague your thoughts when you’re supposed to be having fun.

You take it off your neck, but as you hand it to him, you ask, “Why?”

“Just wanna do some research.”

“Well, be careful. Don’t lose it.”

“Of course, I won’t!” Then, he waves you off. “Go have fun with Mr. Right.”

And off you went.

Dan Heng is looking at his phone, a hand in his pocket when he senses someone coming up behind him. You’re about to put your hands on his shoulders when he turns around and takes one of your hands, startling you. He lowers his hand that’s still holding yours just as he says, “A little early to be trying to sneak up on me."

"I'll get you next time."

A small, mischievous smile. “I’d like to see you try.” You almost scoff but you decide to let it slide. Then, his fingers intertwine with yours. “Let’s go.”

You and Dan Heng exit the station as you ask, “Where are we going?”

“What do you think about the aquarium?”

You smile. “Sounds good to me.” That’s when he notices the locket isn’t around your neck. He hasn’t seen you without it ever since you found out about it. You glance at your empty neck and say, “Young’s pendant is with Pom. He asked to look at it.”

As you and Dan Heng head in the direction of the aquarium, he asks, “What for?”

“He didn’t say, but he wanted to do some research. I’ll ask him when I get back.” Then, you notice the subtle change in Dan Heng's expression as if he's mulling over something. “Is something wrong?”

“I had a dream last night.”

“Was it about Young?”

“I think I was living his life.” Then, he turns to look at you. “I also saw you in my dream.” His boyish grin makes your heart race. “You were younger, and you taught him a lot. I could feel everything that he was feeling.” Your grip on Dan Heng’s hand unexpectedly tightens. “He liked you since both of you were teenagers.”

A pause.

“But I saw also saw something else…” You notice the change in tone where your heart isn’t racing because of the butterflies in your stomach but out of anxiety. “His mother was experimenting with black magic.”

“Black magic?”

Dan Heng nods. “Did you know his mother?”

“...Not that I recall.” When Dan Heng remains silent, you ask, “What are you thinking about?”

“That dream somehow reminded me of my mother,” he answers quietly.

Now that you think about it, you don’t know anything about Dan Heng’s mother.

“Were there similarities?” you ask.

“Young's mother was dabbling in black magic for unknown reasons. I think she was hiding something, which…” You give his hand a light squeeze as if to reassure him. He squeezes back. “...reminded me of how my mother kept her infection a secret.” Your heart drops to the pit of your stomach. Infected? Is it what you think it is? Dan Heng looks at you. “My mother was a victim of The Withering.”

Your face turns pale. “...I’m so sorry.” Does this mean you killed his mother if you’re the one who created the disease? The thought is even more frightening than the nightmare you experienced at the festival.

As if reading your mind, Dan Heng says, “There's a possibility that Young's mother created The Withering,” You quickly look back at him. “We still don’t know everything.”

That’s true, but…

“I’m still surprised if I’m being honest.” While it’s true you don’t know everything, there's still the suspicion that you have something to do with the disease. “How can you still treat me like—” You stop as you hadn’t meant to say that out loud.

“...Because you aren’t running away.” His answer catches you off guard. “Tell me. Are you afraid?” There’s genuine curiosity in his eyes. Your breath catches in your throat as you stare into the blue eyes. “Are you afraid of what you’ll find if you keep digging?”

“Yes.” The answer leaves your lips so quickly and naturally that you aren’t aware you said it. “This wasn’t what I was expecting to find… I didn’t know what to expect, but definitely not something like this.”

“Are you going to give up?”

“No.” Again, you answer so naturally that it almost surprised you. “I came this far. Everything that I’ve done… it would be for nothing if I stop.” You sigh softly. “I can’t back out now. I have to keep going.”

“You choose to face things head-on rather than running away,” Dan Heng says as if already knowing the answer you'll give him. “It’s something I like about you.” Your eyes widen at the direct statement. “...It’s something I couldn’t do for a long time."

You and Dan Heng stop at a red light.

“...Something you couldn’t do?”

“My mother kept her infection a secret from my father and me. When I found out about it… I had a very difficult time coping.” You squeeze his hand tighter. “By then, I’d already transferred to a public school because of my family’s financial matters.”

Dan Heng had never felt so alone.

People would stare at him as if he wasn’t human. His family background had somehow leaked, making it newsworthy to the school. Some people labelled him as the rich kid who'd gone poor. Others pitied him but as Dan Heng wasn't a social person by nature, they found him offputting and thought he had an attitude problem. Then, there were those who didn't have anything against him, but his efforts at making new friends were received apathetically.

Dan Heng had never thought he’d miss his old friends so much. He had pretended everything was fine when it wasn’t. It wasn’t until his mother’s disease worsened that he made some poor decisions that would haunt him for years to come.

Dan Heng closed his locker. His eyes were lifeless and there were dark circles underneath his eyes. He hadn’t been sleeping well if not at all. His health had started to affect his academic performance which was spiralling him further into depression.

“Hi there.”

Dan Heng turned and saw a couple of his female classmates walk up to him. He recognized them as the more popular girls.

“There's a party happening this weekend," one of the girls said. "We want you to be there, Dan Heng."

“Why are you asking me?”

One of the girls gave him a flirtatious grin. “You’re cute, Dan Heng. Believe it or not, you’re quite popular.”

Wow, really? So, why did people avoid him?

“Don’t tell me you don’t know.”

“...About?”

“The guys talk shit about you because they’re just jealous. Some of the girls are too shy to talk to you.”

In reality, it was these girls who were messing with the others to leave Dan Heng alone. Of course, he didn't know that or the fact that they wanted to sleep with him.

“Please come tonight, Dan Heng. It would mean a lot to us.” She handed him a special invite to a club in the heart of Xianzhou. Then, she leaned closer and whispered in his ear. “You won’t regret it. I promise.”

You have a bad feeling about where this story is going.

By now, you and Dan Heng are walking side-by-side inside the aquarium, still holding hands.

“I wanted an escape,” Dan Heng says quietly as the two of you walk into a hallway surrounded by sharks. “So, I went to the party.”

The lively atmosphere was unlike anything Dan Heng had experienced. There were people everywhere. Dancing. Drinking. Talking. Kissing. It was a foreign place where the music was so loud that you had no time to think. Just feel.

Someone grabbed Dan Heng’s arm, and he quickly turned and saw the girl who invited him to the party smile at him. She was wearing a short dress meant to show off her slim but toned body. Her hair was done up, and her makeup stood out. It was obvious she was here to party. She pulled Dan Heng close.

“You came!”

He could smell the alcohol on her breath, but she didn’t seem drunk. Not yet, at least. Then, she quickly dragged him toward a room at the back, away from the noise, heat, and screams.

“Guess who I found?”

Dan Heng recognized a couple of his classmates, but there were others he didn’t know. After the girl introduced him, he found out they were from other schools. The girl led Dan Heng to a couch. When he sat down, she sat next to him and poured him a drink.

“You look like you’ve been having a hard time lately, Dan Heng.” She gave him the glass. “Why don’t you tell us what’s wrong?”

Dan Heng looked at the unfamiliar faces in the room. “...I’d rather not.” He took the glass.

“Oh, well, that’s okay… have a drink first! We can always talk later.”

That was his second mistake. His first mistake was coming to this party.

“I kept drinking,” Dan Heng says as you continue listening carefully. “It felt nice to just forget about everything.” There's hesitation in his voice when he regretfully admits, “But then, they coerced me into doing drugs.”

“I told you it'd feel good, right?" the girl asked.

The world around him was starting to spin. Dan Heng couldn’t see straight, but this euphoric sensation was therapeutic. He was happy, and he didn't want to let this feeling go.

The girl had a small, mischievous grin. "Want another one?"

Was this what it took to… become functional again? To feel like his world wasn’t crashing before his eyes? Dan Heng looked at the smoke between his fingers. Maybe just one more… Maybe just—

His eyes widened when he felt a sudden weight on his legs. When he turned, he saw his classmate straddling him. This made him snap out of it, but his sudden rationality was fighting with his high, which made him lost and confused.

“What... What are you doing?” Dan Heng finally asked with wide eyes. God. His head was suddenly hurting like crazy.

She leaned toward him, purposely rubbing against him, allowing him to feel all of her intimate places. He felt her smirk against his neck. “You’re asking the wrong question, Dan Heng. Y ou should be asking yourself… what aren’t you doing?” She grabbed one of his hands and held it tightly as she brought it to her breasts. “Touch me, Dan Heng…”

Dan Heng slightly opened his mouth to protest, but her lips were on his before he could say anything. Her tongue slipped into his mouth, which almost made him gag. She slowly moved her hips as she opened his hand and forced him to touch her more.

By now, everyone else had left the room.

Dan Heng was shaking as he fought the natural response of his body. He didn't want this. At all. " Stop," he said breathlessly.

"You don't want me to stop." She put a hand on his thigh and teasingly made her way to his hardening sex. "See?"

"Stop it," Dan Heng almost growled.

He was done playing nice. It took all of the energy left in him to force his hand out of her grip and rudely push her onto the couch. His heart was hammering in his chest, and as he stood, he stumbled as he started seeing double. He needed a moment to refocus, but the girl had grabbed his hand.

“Where are you going?”

His response was slightly delayed, but he managed to glare at her and pull his hand back. Without answering her, he quickly headed toward the door... only to find it locked.

He heard a soft giggle. "Oh, Dan Heng, did you really think we would be that stupid?"

Dan Heng was afraid to look back at the sultry way she asked the question. T here was a sickening feeling in his chest that she was laying in some provocative position. He quickly reached for his phone inside his pocket, but the colour drained from his face when he felt nothing.

"Looking for this?"

Dan Heng finally turned back, and he was right. She was laying on her side, exposing her laced lingerie. Her dress was barely on. But that wasn't what caught Dan Heng's attention. It was his phone in her hand. Dan Heng clenched his fists so tightly that his knuckles almost turned white. He wished he could hit her, but he wanted to hit himself more than anything. How could he be so stupid? This wasn't him.

"Give it back," Dan Heng said angrily.

She got up and undid the zipper of her dress and allowed it to fall to her feet. "Stop playing the good boy, Dan Heng." She removed her lingerie. "You can't fight your natural urges."

Fine. If this was how she wanted to play. Dan Heng would fight fire with fire.

Dan Heng walked towards her, his eyes never drifting away from her face. He could see her gaze darkening with desire. She slowly stepped back while he approached, and eventually, she sat back on the couch with Dan Heng leaning over her. Yet, his hands never touched her. Instead, one of his hands was on the couch beside her head, and the other was beside her waist. He fought back a cringe when he felt her hands around his neck.

"Fuck me, Dan Heng," she whispered. "You know you want to."

It was now or never.

His hand found hers, forcing her to drop his phone onto the couch. He kept his eyes on her face as his lips came dangerously close to hers, almost as if he was teasing her. His other hand, holding her underwear, found hers and raised them up over her head.

"Then, you'll have to do as I say."

His voice was low, husky, meant to drive her senses wild. And that was exactly what he got, but she was so caught up in her emotions that by the time she wanted to grab him, she couldn't.

"What the—"

Dan Heng grabbed his phone and swiftly moved away from her with a cold look. The girl's hands were bound with her underwear that Dan Heng had tied together to a small hook above the couch.

"Untie me, you bastard!"

Dan Heng turned away with an indifferent look. “I don’t want to have sex with you, so stop forcing yourself onto me.”

“Are you gay?” she spat.

Dan Heng walked to the door. "There's something called dignity. Try learning about it." With one concentrated kick to the place just above the lock, the door opened. "Careful you don't catch a cold."

Before he left, he heard her shout, “You son of a bitch!”

You are at a loss for words. You never would've thought someone like Dan Heng would have a past like that.

"My father found out about the drugs, and... it just made things worse."

“Do you want to disappoint me further?” his father asked, the anger seeping into his hard tone.

Dan Heng stood in front of him, still unable to believe that a photo of him and his classmates doing drugs had spread around the school. While the drug itself was legal, Dan Heng and his classmates were underaged. Unlike other places, Xianzhou was strict and didn’t tolerate minors doing drugs. Despite Dan Heng’s willingness to take any punishment, his father refused to let this taint his image and Dan Heng’s future. So, he’d spent a hefty fine to erase this from his son's record.

“Get out of my sight.”

His father wasn’t even looking at him when he said it.

“For a long time, I kept thinking I should’ve handled myself better," Dan Heng says. "I should’ve done something rather than just wallow in my emotions. I should’ve been looking after my mother.”

You’re facing him as you say, “You can’t blame yourself. We feel. It’s what makes us human.” You put a hand on his cheek. “Everyone has a past. No one is perfect.”

Dan Heng takes your hand. “You’re right. It took years for me to accept my mistakes, but before then, I always wished I could forget about what happened.” He slightly smiles. “Then, there’s you, who’s doing a job you hate because you want to find out about your past. You're not shying away from what you find.” Dan Heng puts a hand behind your head and says your name. “You intrigue me.”

When you look up, your eyes meet his and then land on his lips. Your heart is pounding in your chest as you and Dan Heng slowly lean closer… and closer…. You close your eyes, and as you feel his soft lips against yours, you also hear a very much unwanted voice.

“How romantic.”

You and Dan Heng quickly pull back and turn in the direction of the male voice. Just then, a large, great white shark swims by behind you and Dan Heng.

“You shouldn't keep a pretty woman all to yourself, Dan Heng. I want in on the fun, too."

He recognizes the voice, and so do you. Dan Heng steps in front of you once the main comes into full view. You knew you’d meet him one way or another but just not here.

“Should I introduce myself?” His golden eyes meet yours.

You don’t need any introductions. You know him. You know him very well.

“Jing Yuan,” you say without realizing it.

Jing Yuan has a hand inside his pocket as he looks at you. “Well, looks like I’m more popular than I thought.”

Chapter 13

End notes:

I wasn't expecting this chapter to be so long lol

I'm curious if you guys have any thoughts on Dan Heng's flashback. The initial draft was actually quite tame, but my mind went... WHAT IF. And yeah, that happened. I'm sorry, Dan Heng T_T

Also, a reader drew a sketch of her interpretation of Cupid!

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