#dracula casting: a. a human actor

[voluptuarian]

I made an actual graphic to represent the process behind the greatest thought I've ever produced in my life, prompted by the theoretical question, how to cast a Muppet Dracula?

[tarabyte3]

Enjoy some photos I took of Andy while waiting in line at PopCon Indy 2024!

Saturday:

Sunday:

And the one mediocre shot I took of him during the panel Saturday:

The microphone wasn't working during the Q&A, so he walked over and handed the fan his own, and then stayed there while he answered the question. 🥺

Panel highlights:

- The Lord of the Rings cast once threw a Hedwig and the Angry Inch party where they all dressed in drag and drank heavily.

- Bill Nighy was apparently so funny during the making of Flushed Away that Andy struggled to get through takes.

- One of his big hobbies when he was a kid was collecting the model kits of classic monsters like Frankenstein, Dracula, and The Phantom of the Opera. (God I fucking love him so much)

- He said that, after Animal Farm is finally finished, one of his dream projects would be to adapt The Phantom Tollbooth! AND that he would love to play The Humbug! (Of course 😂)

- Speaking of: Animal Farm finally has an animation studio signed on and is fully locked in, so it's closer to being finished! Andy said the cast list will probably be announced soon, and that's it's an incredible list of actors he's very excited about.

- He did the Gollum voice and told the Diz story 😍

Side note: The reason I only took one picture is because, while I was watching him talk (I was smack in the middle of the second row!!), I noticed everyone around me had their phones out and pointed at him. And they were looking at their screens more than they were at him. So for the entire panel, he was basically looking out into a sea of phones instead of real, engaged humans. And I ABSOLUTELY get being excited and snapping some pictures (because I do it to capture the moment too!), but it was constant. For 45 minutes. I felt so bad watching him glance around, and I've been trying to be more present in my life anyway, so I put my phone away and enjoyed listening to him talk.

[c-schroed]

Bram Stoker's Dracula (1992) Or Why The Probably Most Accurate Movie Adaptation Of Dracula Still Is Not Accurate Enough

I mentioned some time ago - while salivating over the marvellous razor scene of Francis Ford Coppola's Dracula adaptation - that there is quite some stuff to unpack here. And now I found some time to unpack. So let's begin. I'll start with the good stuff, firstly the good stuff that's not in the book (i.e., the Flourishes), than the good stuff that's true to the book (the Well-Conserved). Thirdly, I'll make note of things that were, unnervingly, changed (by which I mean They Came Back Wrong), and then I'll deal with what is unfortunately left out from the book (the Missing). And finally, finally I'll rant over that two bad things that never were in the book in the first place (a section I'll call JUST WHY?).

So. A tragedy in five acts. Here we go.

Act I - The Flourishes

The razor scene. I think I dealt with this enough by now. It's perfection and I'll die on that hill.

The music. Obviously, Bram Stoker's gothic lil masterpiece is lacking some gorgeous score. But mourn no longer, because Wojciech Kilar cooked up some dashing, pushing tune for us, fitting perfectly to this dark tale of spreading darkness and deepening madness.

Some basic knowledge about blood groups. Yeah, Stoker can't be blamed for this, but still. It's a nice addition to remind us that we do indeed live in a world where blood groups exist.

The Westenra Estate. As much as I pity that the lovely town of Whitby did not make it into the movie, I do love Lucy Westenra's house. Because I'm a sucker for hedge mazes. Simple as that.

Those glasses. Those. Fucking. Nice. Glasses.

Act II - The Well-Conserved

The plot in general. Yes, there are a lot of maddening differences, as we will see soon. But still, this movie at least makes the impression that most of the people working on it had indeed read the darn novel. Which is something that I can't say about many other Dracula adaptations I have seen.

The costumes, the sets, the atmosphere. Well done, everyone!

The Actors. The good thing about being not native in a language is that one is not very prone to dialects that seem off. And as I happen to not be a native speaker of English, I have little problems with Keanu Reeves and Winona Ryder adding some US touch to what should be very, very, v e r y British characters. I even find Reeves perfectly fitting for the oh so darn young Jonathan Harker. And the rest of the cast is marvellous, too (with the exception of Winona Ryder, see below for details). Especially Tom Waits, who is hard-wired to the name of Renfield in my brain ever since I first saw this movie. And Gary Oldman as Dracula… Well. I think I already made clear what opinion I have about that sexy bastard.

Some lucky few of lovely quotes made it over to the film. Dracula's welcome. The Fowl Bauble of Human Vanity, of course. And Qunincey almost making me faint when saying "Little girl" when I least expected it.

Act III - They Came Back Wrong

The dates. Goshdarnit, the dates! It's an epistolary novel, so why make the effort of making up completely new dates for events that already had a precise date in the novel? I just don't get it. And it unnerves me. Every. Fucking. Time.

Time in general. Watching the movie after Dracula Daily makes it feel so very, very hasty. Jonathan travels to Castle Dracula like it's no thing at all. And the first few days in Castle Dracula are condensed into one weird evening.

Dracula meeting Mina before Jonathan is back. I really, really loved the book for avoiding the most terrible tropes. And then comes this movie, and struts right into this terrible pitfall.

Mina. I'm sorry, usually I love the work of Winona Ryder, but here she was way too bland. Maybe it was because her character had quite a revamp (ha. ha.) and no one cared to tell her what new approach she should take. But whatever reason, the clever, adorable train fiend of the original did not deserve this!

Act IV - The Missing

The Voyage of the Demeter is way too short. Where is "But I am captain, and I must not leave my ship"? Where is the poor sea captain tying himself to the wheel? And where is his funeral? Oh, I really missed all that. And, I mean, I don't mind hearing Anthony Hopkins read the lines, but would it have been such an expense to at least hire an additional actor to voice the correspondent or the sea captain?

Jonathan Holding Mina By the Arm. That's really not an objectively big issue. That's just me who fell in love with JonMina after reading this chapter. And almost no one does it properly. They deserve justice!

(Thanks a ton to @smieska for capturing my mood just perfectly!)

Act V - JUST WHY?

Elisabeta. Don't get me wrong here: All of the oh so tragic Drac backstory they invented for this movie is terribly unnecessary. But in this sea of uselessness, the tragically deceased wife of Vlad Țepeș that just so happens to perfectly resemble Mina Murray is an audience-insulting island of unoriginality. I mean, yeah, I guess someone wanted to add some romance to the story of Vlad the Fucking Impaler. Because, well, nineties or so. But Mina, of all women? Why not invent some new character that can be bothered with such stuff? Why ruin an all-nice JonMina ship? I don't get the whole new backstory, and I especially don't get this aspect.

Dracula raping Lucy in his shitty werewolf form. Everything about this is wrong. And it has no relevance for the plot. Just. Blergh.

Epilogue

It's cruel to watch Francis Ford Coppola's take on Dracula right after finishing @re-dracula. I know that now. Everything is still too fresh. It's a good movie, after all, but especially because it's quite good it is frustrating to be so terribly aware of all its shortcomings. In a few weeks or so, I would recommend it, again, I guess. As long as it's still Dracula Off-Season. 7 out of 10 points.

[alpaca-clouds]

How Isaactor became my OTP

I am one fanfic away from having more stories on Isaactor than Trephacard. And I think that would be a good time to talk about how Hector and Isaac became one OTP over basically everyone else.

Okay, technically there are still a lot more Trephacard stories, because I have several stories with just two of the three characters in them.

Still, I by now do like Isaactor more by now. Which is kinda ironic, because while Trephacard was something I started shipping, as soon as I saw the show (it just is a very obvious ship), I was like: "Sure, I can see Isaactor, but I do not have strong feelings about it."

I knew though from the very beginning of writing The lesser Evil, that it would end up with Striga and Morana returning to Styria. And from that came the idea that Striga could try to get the two forgemasters to hook up. Which lead to Five Games of Chess.

But the more I was writing about them, the more interesting did the dynamic become.

What makes them so interesting to me is that they are morally complex. Like, sure, most of the cast in Castlevania has more than enough trauma (which makes for delicious hurt/comfort), but they are also morally somewhat simple.

But then we have those two, who participated in what was meant to be an absolute genocide. Kill all the humans, because for differing reasons the two of them have come to hate humanity. Something that in Isaac's case had like really good reasons. Like, duh, the man survived slavery. As a child non the less. Yes, he has all the reasons to be angry at the world.

Still, Hector was the character who I identified with most. Because he is autistic and a survivor of parental abuse. So, yes. I can very much identify with his anger at the world.

None of that however makes genocide in any way or form justified. (Duh.) And that is, what makes the two so interesting. Because this realization is something they are going to have to deal with sooner or later. That they did something unspeakably bad.

And among that realization there really is only one other person who can understand them: The respective other. Because they both were part of the genocide. They both served Dracula. In a way for different reasons - but still those reasons were somewhat similar. And only the other person really will ever understand.

And yes, of course it should be mentioned that everything else also makes them such interesting characters.

Isaac easily is the best written character in all of Castlevania, where the input by Adetokumboh M'Cormack (the voice actor) really, really shows. Especially as the way the show deals with Isaac's religious conflict is so well depicted. Something that a ton of shows just struggle with - or do not show at all. I mean, how many well written Muslim characters are there in western media? And I mean, let's face it. Most western media does not even know that Sufism is a faith that exists.

Meanwhile I find Hector interesting, because he very much gets pushed into a role that normally female characters will be shown in, given he literally gets sexually assaulted within the show. I mean, for most of seasons 3 and 4 he is very much a damsel in distress waiting to be rescued. Something we usually do not see with male characters.

I will also remain of the opinion: Was Isaac white, the two of them would be the most popular ship of the show. Because they just have this rivals to enemies to lovers dynamic that fandom normally goes of to salivate over.

For myself, of course, there is also just the aspect, that Hector does have quite a few canonical hints that he is still very much kinky. Which makes for fun kinky sex scenes. ;)

But in general I just think the two of them are the most interesting characters and the most interesting dynamic in the show. And I just wished more people would write and create art for them, :(

[doomspiral]

Doom's Movie Rec List

Some of these are bangers, some of these are the worst thing I have ever seen in my life, but I think they are all worth watching and enjoying one way or another. Sometimes the enjoyment is cringe and sometimes its staring at a wall for three hours. <3

The seventh seal (1957)

Classic chess game with Death film, I presume the entire thing is Bergman staring into the soul of the viewer in dead silence until you can read his mind.

The cabinet of Dr. Caligary (1920)

Strange, lurching, I watched this in German without knowing enough to keep up and I believe my confusion added to the experience.

Atomic blonde (2017)

This is my favorite movie. This is the one that I can't stop rewriting in my fics. I can't get the "lies" soliloquy out of my mind. My soul is tied to this fillum. Hot insane woman does a lot of violence, kisses women, beats up a guy who truly deserves it. Iron Curtain Spy Nonsense.

Hackers (1994)

Am I depressing you? Good, watch Hackers to experience child-like wonder and also see a grown man skateboard down a foggy street in the middle of the night to harass the homosexual teenagers (and slim shady) he's beefing with.

The core (2003)

This is not a good movie. But there is a little freak in there named "Rat" who I am obsessed with.

Angel's egg (1985)

This is the kind of movie where you have to not try to figure out what's going on and instead let it take you by the hands, just experience it, just keep your mouth shut and your mind at rest and you can consider the implications afterward when its safe.

Princess mononoke (1997)

I watched this as a child and saw those beasts dissolve into bloody worms and apparently that left a lasting mark on my brain.

Nausicaä of the valley of wind (1984)

I actually read the manga for this one but this is a movie rec list, so please go watch this for the death and rebirth vibes, and some mild foeyay yuri.

Invasion of the body snatchers (1978)

Horror movie that's odd and disturbing and clearly betraying some better dead than red fears, worth it for the horrible despicable freakish noise the guy makes at the end while pointing at the viewer.

Strange days (1995)

Please read up on this before watching it, it revolves around a fictional, then-futuristic critique of the adult film industry, HEAVY focus on the capitalistic dehumanization and devaluing of human life.

Underworld (2003)

Bad asses in leather fighting monsters. Core memory.

Blade (1998)

Bad asses in leather fighting monsters but maybe you need a break from how white this whole movie list is overall. That's okay, I see you, this vampire flick fucks severe.

Fright night (1985, 2011)

The first movie is pretty campy (fun) but the remake dug into my actual stressors and fears and scared the lights from my eyes for a day or two. Welcome... to FrrrighT NighT.

Dracula (1931, 1992)

First movie is a classic, this is thee one with the guy crawling around like a lizard and there's armadillos for no reason. The 90's version has no business being as deranged as it is and for this it is a core personality trait movie.

Fast&furious: Tokyo drift (2006)

Not sure I would say this is peak cinema but it's a racing movie that falls in line with the F&F tradition of being clearly in love with the entire premise, location, and cast. Rent free.

Drive (2011)

I like this movie because it is not about the guy getting the girl, it is about doing the right thing every single time because that's what it takes to be a real human bean. being. whichever. I was so obnoxious about this movie when I watched it with my now-ex gf that I wish I could siphon the memory of it out of her brain, because I kept pointing at actors I knew.

Green room (2015)

This is the best punk parable I can think of. Litany against not reading the room, litany against being the hero when there's no one to save, litany against thinking shared trauma is gonna get you any pussy.

Lords of chaos (2018)

I'm obsessed with the band Mayhem there is no other explanation.

There will be blood (2007)

WILD WEST TOXIC YAOI. I'm not apologizing for this summary and I'm not elaborating.

Butch Cassidy and the sundance kid (1969)

I don't know. I watched this in the wee hours of the morning with my best friend and actually cried about it. Doomed criminals and a famous final stand.

Saw (2004)

I used to watch Saw movies when I lived in the trailer park while hiding from my family in a neighbor's place so I don't know if these movies are good or if I needed to watch tortureporn to relax bcs the roof leaked on my bed when it rained? But I think everyone should at least watch the first movie or how are you going to play any games?

Chernobyl diaries (2012)

I walked out of this movie shaking head to toe and couldn't think about anything else for months. I don't think I'd be as scared now but I can't say if that's because I'm not 16 anymore. Warning against going into a dangerous situation with a guy you met off Craigslist.

Constantine (2005)

Demon hoards, evil angels, catholic bullshit, 9/10.

The neverending story (1984)

Well after all that let's reinstate some whimsy into our souls again bcs this is the Jim Henson Power Hour. This one is just a solid entry point into "puppets are fun and practical effects are my best friend".

The dark crystal (1982)

My babysitters put this on for me as a bed-time story when I was five (5) years old and I do not believe I slept, I think they regretted this and had to tell my parents what they did. But now I will never stop making Skeksis noises at people I love.

Labyrinth (1986)

Y'know the phenomenon of alt teens and preteens dating young adult men who are total and complete losers, including actual band members? It's not that this pre-dates any of that, but I believe it does a good job representing it through the lens of a modern fairy tale. Like when you watch this you have to realize this is wish fulfillment for people who want to be Sarah because their age-gap goth boyfriend in the real world is a manipulative disappointment.

Pacific rim (2013)

Love letter to the mecha and kaiju genre(s). Makes no sense, compels me though.

Eurotrip (2004)

This is the movie "Scotty doesn't know" is from. Some high schoolers fuck off to Europe and have the most misadventure possible. It's somehow exactly the kind of cringe humor you would expect from the 00's without being cruel or overly disgusting. I used to watch a lot of really bad 00's comedies and this is a good one I promise. Scussie.

Hamlet (1996)

Personality point, I think this is the best version on film because the guy actually looks like how I envisioned Hamlet. Ignore your girl! Avenge your dad!

Advantageous (2015)

This movie goes in on the connection between race and class in a sci-fi future where you can change the former through predatory, dangerous cosmetic surgery.

Gravity (2013)

This is my go-to movie when I need to sob like a sick little baby. Space travel as a metaphor for motherhood, spaceships as the womb, scientists are the babies who left their babies back on earth. It's about what you give up in the name of fulfilling your human urge for the unknown.

All clear on the western front (2022)

Thee anti-war fillum. Very well done. I never recovered from one of the final scenes to the point I wrote a final paper on it. Without spoiling it, the Ending gave me the feeling of when you're a kid and you want to go play, but you're grounded and you fall asleep listening to your friends outside in the street. I hope this sentence ruins your life if you watch this movie.

Inglorious basterds (2009)

They lock some nazis in a theatre and set them on fire, good cinema.

Shadow dancer (2012)

Domhnall Gleeson in one of his classically pathetic twink roles but its about British imperial violence and Irish reactionary violence.

Logan (2017)

Good art film, a story about dementia, legacies, and why putting children in cages is fucking evil.

The batman (2022)

Weird art film, next question.

Joker (2019)

I do not care about the opinions of straight men who watch things uncritically, this is a good movie because of the depictions of poverty in the US. I don't believe this needed to be about the DC Joker this should have been a standalone art film about a mime.

Dragonheart (1996)

Medieval era dragon nonsense, I will never be convinced this is a bad movie.

Sleeping beauty (1959)

Personality trait was rooting for the dragon.

Snow dogs (2002)

I'm not defending this one it stands on its own, please watch this movie if you wanna see Cuba Gooding Jr. bite a husky's ear so it'll stop ruining his life.

Luck of the irish (2001)

This movie is genuinely so bad I have considered it some kind of hate crime since the day it came out, because I watched this the day it was a direct-to-TV movie. I think I was too young to feel insulted but I was deeply, deeply bemused.

Black swan (2010)

There is a woman inside her and she is trying to crash the plane. Can I get away with calling this foe-yay yuri also? I'm going to.

I, tonya (2017)

Sufjan Stevens' song "Tonya Harding in Eb major" makes me so unreasonably emotional, so one day I watched this movie and then the film of the 1988 Calgary Olympics in the living room while all of my housemates had to sneak around in the dark. This is just a solid movie about ambition, betrayal, abuse, tragedy, and having to get over it and move on because you're not dead yet.

Phantom of the opera (2004)

Whatever was going on in Labyrinth, this is the adult version. Weird man in a sewer possessing a soprano. I think there's some gender happening here but it gets a little lost under the love(?) triangle.

A knights tale (2001)

Just go watch some more medieval nonsense, it's good for you, its fun.

White chicks (2004)

I'm not defending this choice, it's a good movie. "You were thinking it" "Yeah but you said it" there are some phrases you could use to see if I had been replaced with a body double and this is one of them.

Heathers (1988)

Ouughhgh ough oh. Personality trait. Watched this because I kept listening to the musical soundtrack, love both but agree the themes are much tighter in the movie. This is just a fun schlock to tell teens life is stupid and difficult and bad things will happen, so don't abandon your friends.

Priscilla queen of the desert (1994)

Classic homo fillum, if you wonder why I write Gilbert Like That it's partially because of the mean little fruit from this movie. It's about the Aussie drag scene and who belongs in the queer community.

300 (2006)

I'm not sure that I would call this a "good" movie, but it's a classic as far as I'm concerned. This is the "THIS IS SPARTA" movie.

The foreigner (2017)

I actually don't remember the plot of this one too solidly but the suspense and action were solid, and I enjoyed the setup. Good for if you wanna be really pissed off for two hours.

Conan the barbarian (1982)

Look at me. Look into my eyes. You're going to watch this movie. You're going to think about the wheel of pain and you're going to go wow, this is so stupid. Don't look away I'm not done. You're going to watch this movie and then you're going to get a couple of paper towel tubes and find someone to beat the shit out of each other with the tubes.

Law abiding citizen (2009)

I don't know I think watching this movie changed my brain chemistry in very special ways. Guy fucking loses it and becomes a problem for his local community by kidnapping and torturing people who killed his family. Cathartic and vile.

Black dog (1998)

:D DO YOU WANNA WATCH AN ACTION MOVIE ABOUT AN 18-WHEELER?

The hunt for red october (1990)

Almost forgot this one. Lithuanian Submariner off the shits, goes rogue, I'm not sure what accent Sean Connery is going for, I get the impression he just showed up to gigs and did whatever he wanted.

[twistedtummies2]

Top 10 Portrayals of Renfield

The time has come to cover our last supporting player in Bram Stoker’s Dracula. I’m skipping over Arthur Holmwood and Quincey Morris, on account of a lack of really great interpretations for either, which means our next major character of note is Renfield: the deranged lunatic who acts as the Count’s mortal servant.

Renfield is interesting in that, much like Van Helsing, his role has become more pronounced over the years. In fact, Renfield caught on as a major character EARLIER than Van Helsing, as even the very earliest Dracula films included a Renfield character of some sort, and many movies that don’t have ANY of the other characters from the novel rather frequently feature either Renfield or some sort of “Renfield surrogate.” In the book, however, the madman is actually a relatively peripheral character: he doesn’t really DO a whole lot, in the grand scheme of things, but rather acts as a sort of “warning siren.” Renfield’s psychic connection to Dracula makes him a sort of living bookmark: someone who can track the vampire’s moves throughout the novel, even when the other characters aren’t physically near the Count. He also acts as an interesting counterpoint to Dracula and his Brides: they are powerful, seductive, grandiose figures of evil who represent a sort of decadent “gold standard” of vampirism. Renfield is a disheveled psychotic who scavenges for bugs and other small animals to feed his growing appetite, worshiping Dracula in a cultist-like fashion. He is the bottom-feeding parasite in comparison to the Satanical power Dracula seems to exude. Over the years, creators have built up Renfield’s character in a variety of ways, expanding his role in the story and giving him more depth and focus. It makes sense, when you think about it: if any character is going to be as memorable as the great and powerful King of the Vampires, it’s going to be his scurvy little henchman who eats insects in-between bursts of mad raving. For actors, it’s a great role to sink one’s teeth into (no pun intended), as Renfield allows a performer to go wild in ways other roles can’t provide, and make some interesting choices through. There are lots of vampire familiars to go through, so let’s waste no more time: these are My Top 10 Favorite Portrayals of Renfield!

10. Roland Topor, from Nosferatu the Vampyre.

In the first remake of “Nosferatu,” French artist Roland Topor was cast - in a rare acting role - in the role of Renfield. I don’t know much about Topor or any other work he may have done as a performer, beyond this movie, but I will say this, he doesn’t do half bad! His Renfield is delightfully creepy and yet rather funny at the same time. I love the way Dracula just sort of shrugs him off, clearly irritated with his sycophantic servant, in the scenes they share together. My only problem is that Topor’s Renfield just sort of vanishes from the movie after a certain point; we never find out what happened to him by the end of the picture. For all we know, he could still be out there…dun-dun-dunnn…

9. Tony Haygarth, from the 1979 Film.

Among other roles, I know Tony Haygarth for voicing a rather depraved version of the Mad Hatter, in the movie “Dreamchild” (which came out six years after the Frank Langella picture). I don’t know who decided to cast this man as two of literature’s most famous maniacs, but I’m glad it happened. In the film, Renfield first appears as a dockyard worker, who has a grudge against the Jonathan Harker and his family for past injustices. This makes him all the more fitting a stooge for Dracula. As the film goes on, Renfield grows increasingly insane, visibly changing from a relatively rational human to a broken mess before his final destruction.

8. Pablo Alvarez Rubio, from “Spanish Dracula.”

Much like its English-language counterpart, the Spanish version of Universal’s acclaimed 1931 “Dracula” conflates the characters of Renfield and Jonathan Harker: Jonathan still appears, but it’s Renfield who visits Castle Dracula, and then returns to England with the Count aboard a doomed ship. This works as a sort of origin story for the character, which several other versions have taken influence from. Rubio may not be as iconic as Dwight Frye’s scene-stealing Renfield, but he’s not a bad interpretation, either. However, I think the Spanish version makes some choices in edits that ultimately hinder his performance, and bring it down in the ranks.

7. Nicholas Hoult, from Renfield.

In this movie, the partnership between Dracula and Renfield is hamfistedly examined as a study in toxic relationships. More of a dark superhero film than a proper Gothic Horror outing, Hoult’s Renfield eats bugs not out of an urge to consume life, but because munching on insects and arachnids gives him superhuman abilities for brief periods of time. While not by any means the definitive version of the character, he is fun to watch and Hoult turns in a spectacular performance.

6. Samuel Barnett, from Penny Dreadful.

In Season 3 of Penny Dreadful, Renfield goes beyond simply being a vampire’s familiar to slowly being transformed into a vampire proper. He starts off as a seemingly mild-mannered, proper Victorian gentleman…but when Dracula learns of some dark secrets in Renfield’s life, he uses that to his advantage and snatches Renfield up to act as a spy against his enemy. Barnett’s Renfield is deliciously creepy, mercurial, and runs the gamut from somewhat sympathetic to utterly detestable. He was easily one of my favorite parts of Season 3.

5. Klaus Kinski, from the 1970 Film.

In this Jess-Franco-directed adaptation, Klaus Kinski - who might be the only actor to play Renfield who was probably insane in real-life (seriously, Kinski was…QUITE the piece of work, as a person, behind the scenes) - plays a mute Renfield. While he never speaks a word, and does relatively little throughout the film, he steals every scene he’s in, and is given a more sympathetic portrayal; this Renfield often seems more like a scared, confused child than anything else, and has a tragic backstory behind his madness. At the same time, he’s still dangerous, even trying to strangle Mina while under Dracula’s command at one point. Apparently, Kinski had no idea he was even in a Dracula movie during the making of the film, which seems a bit far-fetched to me…but if it is true, I guess there were worse ways to handle it than just giving this utterly demented individual free reign to just…do whatever the heck he wanted for a while. :P

4. Alexander Granach, from Nosferatu.

Referred to as “Knock” in this version, Renfield is given a role that is in some ways expanded upon from the novel, and yet also somehow still very peripheral. He’s in a lot of the movie, but much of what he does is totally separate from the main plot of the film. At the start of the movie, the character is already clearly on an uneven keel, and is indicated to already be working for Count Orlok (Dracula): the Harker character is actually his employee, and Knock sends him out fully knowing what horrors await him. As the movie goes on, Knock goes increasingly more insane, desperate to find and reconnect with his Master. While delightfully over-the-top, there are actually a few legitimately creepy moments with the character too: at one point, he gets hit in the head with two stones, thrown by angry villagers, and…just…doesn’t even REACT to them. I don’t know why, but that particular moment always unnerves me when I watch it.

3. Tom Waits, from the 1992 Film.

While Tom Waits is no stranger to acting, it was still surprising to see him pop up in this star-studded adaptation of the Bram Stoker novel, directed by Francis Ford Coppola. This version seems to take some subtle cues from the Universal films of 1931, as its indicated Renfield preceded Jonathan in doing deals with the Count, and returned to England a changed (and deranged) man. While his role is, once again, relatively set to sidelines, Waits is memorable every time he shows up, ranging from a relatively reasonable-sounding gentleman to a raving, bloodthirsty psycho at the drop of a hat.

2. Jack Shepherd, from the 1977 BBC TV Film.

While this television production mostly sticks to the novel, one of the more noteworthy deviations it takes is with Shepherd’s portrayal of Renfield. In this version, slightly more focus is given to Renfield’s relationship with Mina, and the character actually goes through a sort of redemption arc. At the start of the story, he is Dracula’s bloodthirsty slave; more like a sort of two-legged dog than a human being. As the story goes on, instead of going more crazy, Renfield begins to regain his sanity and morality. Instead of helping Dracula and being slain by the Count as a way for the vampire to cover his tracks, Shepherd’s Renfield stands up to his Master in the end, effectively sacrificing himself to try and help the other characters. Eat your heart out, Nicholas Hoult: the BBC got there a lot sooner, and STILL made him crazy. XD

1. Dwight Frye, from the 1931 Film.

For me, just as it’s next to impossible to separate Bela Lugosi (and Christopher Lee) from Dracula, it’s impossible to separate Dwight Frye from Renfield. In some ways, I actually think his performance is the best in the entire movie, trumping even the work of Lugosi and Edward Van Sloan as Van Helsing! Frye’s Renfield is legitimately scary, even by today’s standards, but is also a very sympathetic and tragic character (and at times genuinely funny, too). You really feel sorry for Renfield: an initially innocent man driven mad by Dracula’s corruption, who has to struggle between his loyalty to his Master and his desire to keep his soul clean of guilt. Frye maneuvers through all of Renfield’s moods and modes, from sane and gentlemanly to absolutely freaking off his rocker, with great aplomb. Without a shadow of a doubt, he is My Favorite Renfield.

[thenightling]

The Universal Monsters were surprisingly diverse

Everyone thinks that Media has "Gone woke" with diversity today but it occurred to me that the original Universal movie monsters were actually extremely diverse. Observe. Phantom of the Opera - French Dracula - Character from Romania / From Transylvania. Only American-made Dracula movie with an authentic Transylvanian. Dracula was played by an immigrant actor actually from Transylvania (which was part of Hungary at the time before reverting back to Romania. The boarders were shifting so often than "just to be safe" when Bela Lugosi became an American citizen he renounced citizenship to both Hungary and Romania. Dracula (Spanish version) - Filmed at night using the same sets as the Bela Lugosi movie in 1931, it is arguably better than the Bela Lugosi movie. Has an all-Spanish cast and better effects than the Bela Lugosi movie. Dracula's daughter (1936) - The character is canonically bisexual despite the era. Frankenstein - The Frankenstein's monster was brought to life (in the novel) in Ingolstadt Bavaria. The 1931 film was directed by James Whale (a gay man). And The Creature was played by Boris Karloff, an Anglo-Indian Man. Bride of Frankenstein - The most compassionate human character was the visually impaired old man who was self-sufficient, a surprisingly progressive portrayal of disability for the era. And the original Frankenstein monster was played by a man who was Anglo-Indian. Ernest Thesiger (who was gay in real life) played Dr. Pretorius. Son of Frankenstein and Ghost of Frankenstein - Features Ygor, who has a neck / spinal disability. (Not a hunchback the way the zeitgeist version has you think.) These films also feature a one armed police chief constable. The Wolfman - Welsh (though played by an American.) Bela Lugosi (immigrant) was also in the film. And the film has Roma characters, including the very sympathetic Maleva. Frankenstein meets The Wolfman - One of the main characters is a pro-active older Roma woman instead of a pretty damsel. Unfortunately the movie was badly chopped up for its theatrical release because test audiences didn't like Bela Lugosi's voice as the monster and didn't realize the Frankenstein monster was now Ygor's brain in The Monster's body (obviously most of the test audiences missed Ghost of Frankenstein). Had the film not been tampered with, this would have portrayed The Frankenstein monster as blinded, that's why this movie started the trend of imagining the Frankenstein monster stumbling around with his arms out stretched. Maleva (Roma) was also in this one. The Mummy - North African (Though played by an Anglo-Indian man from the UK, Boris Karloff. It was 1932 so it wasn't the best representation but the character was still North African). The Invisible man - Depicts mental illness (with arguable authenticity). Also directed by James Whale (gay man who directed Frankenstein). House of Frankenstein - The Welsh (Actually American) Wolfman falls in love with a Roma woman. Boris Karloff (who was Anglo-Indian) was in it but not as The Frankenstein monster. Abbott and Costello Meet Frankenstein - The Invisible Man (though his scene is brief) was played by Vincent Price (bisexual in real life). Bela Lugosi (an immigrant from Transylvania (which was part of Hungary at the time) played Dracula. Creature from the black Lagoon - The Creature is from South America. The movie is from 1954 and features a woman scientist. An Immigrant from Eastern Europe, an Anglo-Indian, a gay director, at least one gay actor, at least one bisexual actor, a bisexual woman character, a North African character. Disability representation. Women, including a woman scientist. And more representation. That's more diversity than The Avengers.

[meerawrites]

why do you like the vampire chronicles?

- a fellow fan

Ooh boy, this will probably be an essay blog post at some point, but, I shall endeavour to give the TLDR version to the best of my present ability. None of us really changes over time. We only become more fully what we are and memory is a monster.

Do not ask me to recall my age, I am 20 now, though I often feel like Louis and Lestat, inhuman and haven't been human for 200 years. Plus the pandemic destroyed my sense of time.

Before the pandemic, a dear friend of mine introduced me to gothic literary vampires, I had just read Shelley's Frankenstein and The Picture of Dorian Gray of my own accord, and he cast me as Mina Murray-Harker in his production of Dracula (1897) opposite one of my best friends as Lucy Westenra himself as Jonathan and one of our aspiring villain actors as Count Dracula himself. I then got hooked on Dracula (the 1897 novel) and following that I wanted more vampires. We watched the 1994 IWTV Neil Jordan film together and I immediately took Lestat as my pathetic bi meow meow. I read the 1976 novel not that far after and started role-playing and cosplaying Lestat as soon as I understood him enough to make him my bi pathetic meow meow. I wouldn't pick up the chronicles again until catholic school and the move to Canada.

When I was in middle school I was a constant victim of bullying, mostly by the white rich kids for being brown, and vaguely gothic in inclinations and "witchy" and "other." My dad was also emotionally overbearing and expected a lot at an early age from me. He has since gotten better and I'm no longer anyone's victim, but, it's worthwhile to note I was victimized (past tense) for a long time. I've also had my fair share of misogyny + anti brown racism flung at me, and I am bi and genderqueer. For the record I forgive my middle school bullies, we were simply kids who didn't know better. Now, do better. I've also been the victim of emotional abuse and gaslighting, while it never escalated to physical that sort of violence even if emotional violence sticks with you. But as mentioned, victimized, in past tense.

I moved to Canada and suffered the indignity of the Catholic school system. I quit after a year and after their queerphobia made international news. But not before a brief run as a spiteful bi as fuck atheist and picking up The Vampire Lestat, finally.

Before the pandemic, I felt like Louis de Pointe du Lac and Mona Mayfair, during the pandemic and in catholic school I felt like Nicolas de Lenfent, following the pandemic and up til the present I aspire to be something of a Lestat de Lioncourt and Rowan Mayfair meaning less cynical, unlearning my shame, confident, clever at least intellectually but foolishly in love with the beauty of humanity. Now, we're here.

IWTV 1994 lost in adaptation

Vampire Reviews: IWTV 1994 ft @elisaintime

What Constitutes Evil?

Vampire Reviews: The Vampire Chronicles ft @elisaintime

Vampire Reviews: The Vampire Lestat ft @elisaintime

Late Interview with the Vampire author Anne Rice remembered by trans woman she helped come out.

Tagging: @covenofthearticulate, @monstersinthecosmos, @elisaintime & @the-brat-prince-1760, @dontbesylly & @i-want-my-iwtv (no pressure to reply, I just thought y'all would appreciate this story).

[thefingerfuckingfemalefury]

Thirty One Days of Horror Movies! Day Twenty Two :D

The Last Voyage of the Demeter!

When a young doctor volunteers to come aboard the Demeter, a ship bound for England carrying a mysterious cargo, he has little idea of the horror he's walked into...the initial discovery of a stowaway followed by strange deaths makes the entire crew suspicious but they soon learn that the killer is not one of them....in fact the killer is not even human. And as the body count rises it becomes increasingly unlikely any of them will live to make it to shore...

Adapted from a portion of Bram Stoker's "Dracula", the movie follows the events of the doomed ship that carries Dracula to Whitby.

The film makes excellent use of its utterly isolated location...miles from land with no way to all get off the ship, the movie does a good job of getting some caustrophobic terror out of the crew's situation and the terror of being trapped at the mercy of something utterly inhuman and monstrous

The effects used for Dracula's vampire form here are solid stuff, creating a memorably creepy and menacing creature. This take on vampire mythos leans heavily into the more monster-y side of them. There's no debonair and dashing count in a cloak to be found here, rather a terrifying beast

The cast is also solid, particularly the actor playing main character Clemens, the unlucky doctor who joins the crew not realising just what is lurking on the ship

There's some good creepy sequences and while the ending is a little shaky this is still a fun horror flick to check out this spooky month :D

[thenoisethatkeepsmeawake]

Hi there! It seems like you watch a wide variety of horror movies. Could you recommend some interesting or unique vampire films that have caught your attention?

Hi there anon,

I'd sure like to help. Since you say "interesting or unique" I'll skip over the widely praised usual things. Vampire basics like Bram Stoker's Dracula (looks gorgeous, great cast, perfect soundtrack), The Lost Boys (peak 80s style) or Blade (great vampire action).

Only Lovers Left Alive - vampires are somewhat immortal and living long enough brings its own bag of emotions. Dread, depression, nihilism. Tilda Swinton and Tom Hiddleston play longtime married vampires living mostly apart and drifting back into each other's life for a bit. Also blood sucking isn't all that fun with todays diseases. (IMDB)

Near Dark - this is a classic, but sometimes it gets overlooked. Director/writer Kathryn Bigelow tells a sorta western story, but there are vampires in it, except we don't even call them that. It starts with young dude means a beautiful woman, and oops she bites him and then he falls in with the crowd she hangs out with. Lots of violence in this one. (IMDB)

Stake Land - I really enjoy the film "Daybreakers" about a world with vampires being the dominant species and the problems it causes, that is a wider known film of that variety. "Stake Land" is like the discarded sibling, focusing on a post-apocalyptic atmosphere. A vampire hunter finds a survivor who just saw his family being slaughtered and they drive cross-country to hopefully find a safe place. If you like typical zombie-apocalypse genre conventions, then this is a nice vampire version. (IMDB)

Shadow of the Vampire - really not a hidden gem, but I have to mention it. This film tells the story of the filming of Murnau's 1922 "Nosferatu", but in this the lead actor Max Schreck is actually a vampire. Willem Dafoe gives a wonderful performance and it's just film history wrapped into vampire drama. (IMDB)

What We Do in the Shadows - this was definitely unique when it came out and hey, it spawned a whole tv show. A mockumentary about vampires just living in the real world. Just fun to watch. (IMDB)

Cronos - this is Guillermo del Toro's first feature film and tbh it's been forever since I've seen it. There is a device that grants immortality, but the side effects are pretty much turning into a vampire (the hunger for blood, not going out in the sun). An old man finds the device and a not so noble businessman desperately wants it. Fun to see early del Toro and his use of monsters vs human evil. (IMDB)

A Girl Walks Home Alone at Night - an Iranian black-and-white film, about a female vampire who is drawn into some family drama about addiction. Not an easy watch, very stylistic (influenced highly by spaghetti western), but also really interesting with the themes of desire and danger. Unique for sure. (IMDB)

We Are the Night - if I'm really honest, I'm not sure I would even call this a good film. There is so much I'd like to change. BUT I also absolutely adore it for being unapologetic about a group of women doing what the fuck they want - as vampires. And there is a reason they don't turn men. This is something that can be build on. (IMDB)

Byzantium - full disclosure, I saw this once and didn't enjoy it much, but I want to give it another shot, because I think I was in the wrong mood back then. Director Neil Jordan is good with visuals and being weird like in "Interview with the Vampire", "The Butcher Boy" ot"Breakfast on Pluto". And here he tells a long interwoven life story of a mother and daughter vampire duo. In a world where vampires have a strict code and used to be mostly noble men. So there is class and gender in the mix, lots of sexuality (there is rape and prostitution) etc etc. Maybe this could be for you, idk. (IMDB)

Let the Right on in - always to be found on a list like this. There is the Swedish film (based on the book) and an US remake that made a few choice changes, but is overall still worth watching. Kinda a bummer to put it out as a vampire film right away. When I read the book I thought it was just a serial killer story and the twists and turns of who is who was a wild ride. There is a young boy who gets bullied at school, but befriends the new kid in the neighborhood who seems to live a weird life. Heavy themes about grooming and the true horror only sets in at the end. (IMDB)

As for simple vampire action, I do love the "Underworld" series. This year's "Abigail" shouldn't have revealed it was a vampire film at all, but it's very bloody and funny, so a quick watch. Also a bloody good time is "30 Days of Night", and I stand by my belief that red blood looks fantastic on white snow. If you like animated films, the anime "Vampire Hunter D: Bloodlust" is a great gothic vampire love story. There's lots to find.

[monstersinthecosmos]

I have no intention of watching the new IWTV show, but I was wondering why you think Armand's characterization was so bad. I kinda hated how Antonio Banderas played him in the 1994 movie (not on its own, just in comparison to the books - I feel like his personality/demeanor was totally different), so it's sad that they still haven't gotten him right... Judging from pictures alone, I did think the casting for him was more fitting this time. Anyway, just curious to hear your thoughts!

Oh man!!!!!!!!! I do wanna say up front, I think Antonio was NOT A GREAT ARMAND but I like those scenes in the movie so much because they feel SO RICEY to me. Like I LOVE Movie!Armand even though he isn't Book!Armand, and if you read IWTV in good faith it's the only book that doens't harp on Armand looking like a smol uwu cherub so like ! SURE. He definitely still brings the calm nurturing mentor vibe in a huge way and the scenes in his room feel the most like the books to me.

I also know from the director's commentary that they specifically wanted Armand to look like that so that the Europe vampires would feel like OLD WORLD SCARY vs like, another twink lol. So he's got a little more of a tropey Dracula vibe going on and I think like as a visual contrast it works really well.

As far as the show; I think Assad is EXCELLENT. And like the whole fandom was joking even when the credits hit IMDB that it was gonna be Armand because everyone was like "OHH ARRIGHT.. LOUIS'S """""ASSISTANT"""""" OKAY !" so like I was one of the conspiracy theorists looking for clues the whole time. And his MANNERISMS are dead on and gave him away before anything else did. I have zero issue with the actor, I think he's so spooky and a complete smokeshow which Armand DESERVES. And I wish I could like the show for him, I really do! But it's just NOT WORKING FOR ME.

I'll put the rest under a cut cause it got lengthy and I'm not trying to like be a downer on anyone's dashboard but TLDR the show is so completely unrecognizable to me and I think it would've been so much better as an original concept, and personally I'm not excited by randos who share names with the books I read. The show is a hit! People really like it! But idk like showing me these two random ass men and saying "Hey this is Daniel and Armand" doesn't excite me because the story they're showing me actually ISNT Daniel and Armand lol. I'm here for the story!!! I'm not here for Easter Eggs!

Here's my main few gripes with how they wrote Armand which I find mega disappointing:

He spends 6.9/7 episodes pretending to be Louis's assistant named Rashid. WHY! LOL. Why would he do that! DANIEL DOESN'T REMEMBER HIM ANYWAY SO WHY???????? I DONT UNDERSTAND. Like Armand is a weirdo but is he THIS WEIRD? idk. idk.

The show also (in my opinion!) horrifically botched Lestat, but there's like this grain of doubt because the show has a theme of memory being unreliable, so the speculation is that maybe Armand planted a skewed version of events in Louis's head? Even the show runner sort of hinted at this? LIKE I HATE THIS?? Because if we get to S2 and it turns out that Lestat's been misrepresented, it then turns the tables and makes it that ARMAND is the one who's horrifically botched????? Like I'm all for silly Armand jokes and memes and whatever but like. sigh idk i just looked really forward to this show and hoped to see Armand on screen and I didn't really want a meme version of him. ((Also as an aside I really dislike the unreliable memory themes on the show the way they're presented because like the books frame unreliable narration as like interpretive and emotional but the vampire lore canonically is that they have like mega supernatural photographic memory? idk. If memory is faulty because they still have that human fallibility it's one thing unless they're saying Armand planted memories in Louis's head??? idk idk.))

And like speaking towards whether or not Armand is a person who would plant false memories in Louis's head; I concede that he psychically influenced Louis to join him in IWTV but like. ARMAND IS A NUANCED CHARACTER WHO ACTS FROM A PLACE OF NEED AND HURT. And idk it's just so fucking clunky I can't imagine the manipulation taking this type of shape. There's just, to me LOL, a huge difference between the mental nudge of "You are lonely and you need guidance please come with me" and "Lestat was a horrific domestic abuser." And like. idk. Just within the package of the whole rest of the season, this team has the subtlety of dropping a fucking piano so I just have no trust in them to write him with any sense of nuance.

AND THE BIGGEST OFFENSE THAT I'M JUST COMPLETELY DISGUSTED BY IS THAT HE'S A DAYWALKER?????????????????????????????????????????????????

I just hate the daywalking shit so fucking much I can't even start. Like the show changes a lot of the lore which is fine whatever it's their show change lore if you feel like it whatever but like. ARMAND'S ENTIRE LIFE IS THEMATICALLY BOOKENDED BY DARKNESS. He grows up in a CAVE. He lives in a CULT BENEATH A CEMETARY. He tries to KILL HIMSELF by GOING INTO THE SUN.

Like. And he's only 500? That's like adolescent for a vampire LOL.

There were a couple times in the season where they had some continuity errors on the show!lore so I got the vibe that the writers didn't really care about all the VAMPIRE STUFF which is kinda disappointing to me bc I'm a nerd lol but it felt like they used Armand in the sun to just give the audience a red herring and it came across as really cheap to me. So I wouldn't put it past this team to kinda be like DAYWALKING SURE LOL and not really take it seriously or think about the larger picture of how that unfolds for the character over more seasons.

IT'S WHATEVER, I JUST. I know it wouldn't make good television but I like VC because it's like existential dread and consuming darkness, I want it to hurt me, I want it to feel bleak, I want Armand's entire arc to be about how much he struggles with the idea that there's no God. It just feels like if you can make it a few centuries and be able to withstand the sun, what's the fucking point? What sacrifice did you make for being immortal? Especially for a character like Armand who so fully believes himself to be damned and would never want to make another vampire, would never subject even an enemy to it.

Especially bc like in the show the vampires can like ? Smoke? And have sex? And they can eat food (even though it tastes like paste but they can eat food). IF YOU CAN SMOKE AND FUCK AND GO IN THE SUN YOU'RE JUST A GUY. Where's the fucking DAMNATION OF IT ALL? Also what's the fucking point of Those Who Must Be Kept if you can go in the sun lol. I just . Ugh what a clusterfuck.

The show turns vampirism into more of a power fantasy than the way the books treat it as damnation or a symbol of being othered so it doesn't really mesh with like, my idea of VC and what I want out of it.

So Armand being a daywalker = Instant Nope From Me. I'm not interested in whatever they're trying to sell me lol.

A few other things that are NOT confirmed but generally just giving me the ick that I worry about:

I really, really, deeply, truly, hated how they wrote Claudia's character and how they wrote about rape, and that gives me a really bad feeling about how they'd potentially tackle Armand's canon background. The two options are: They don't, and he's a completely different character with a different background, with completely different context for his personality/motivations/etc (in which case who the fuck cares he's just some guy who shares a name with the book I like, and not really Armand), or: They GO THERE and it's just extremely heavy handed and insensitive and not fun to watch. I think show!Claudia maybe has more in common with Armand than book!Claudia because they aged her up to be a teenager so it's just, yikes. THEN AGAIN ARMAND IS NO LONGER A TEENAGER ON THE SHOW?

And to that point like. I don't need a bunch of fucking conservatives getting in my face about how I want to see a teenager sexualized because that's not the point; logistically for TV it makes sense that he's older, but again, it changes his backstory so much. imho, Armand being turned as a teenager and looking like a teenager is a huge element of his character! It's important! It just is! And I'm sorry that the show decided that the vampires could have sex, because they invented this problem for themselves! If they kept the canon lore you wouldn't have to see them have sex anyway LOL.

I also was not a fan of the truncated timeline of the show; season 1 takes place in like 30 years I think? And covers from the beginning of the story until Lestat's murder. And I believe Louis will meet Armand in the 1940s; they have the original interview in the 70s and they're together then, and they're together in the present in 2022. Idk I'm just not impressed; humans can get divorced after 30 years too, what's the point of having immortal characters if you're not gonna stretch out the timeline? And so much happens for Armand and Louis in canon and I have no idea what's happened or not happened on the show yet, no one's really sure which events have happened yet in the present day segments of the show. So like idk there's just a lot of Armand/Louis stuff to be smushing into 70 years lol and I'm bummed that they're rushing through the timeline so much.

So I just. Sigh. There's a lot of themes in VC that I really adore that the show doesn't care about, like being VERY OLD and NEVER SEEING THE SUN AGAIN but. I'm in the minority on this one because people love the show LOL. I'm happy for everyone who likes it, but it's not for me.

And like. Just! I knew going in that it would be the Loustat Show, I think everyone knew that, I didn't have huge expectations for Armand/Daniel content but it's such a small part of the books that like it would've been nice to get a couple scenes or some gifs out of it or whatever. It just sucks that like they SET UP the series in a way that the Devil's Minion won't happen on screen. And it sucks that like, depending how long the show runs for or how long AMC retains the rights, this might be the only chance in my lifetime that I had to see Devil's Minion on screen and it's not going to happen.

It's just a bummer man!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

sorry to anyone who likes the show lol I just found it to be like mega disappointing and I don't think I'm going to watch S2, I'm too upset about Armand & Daniel LOL.

[neathyingenue]

hmmm. top 5 properties/media/whatever you think should get a muppets movie adaptation >:3

oh NO a muppet question!! my ONE WEAKNESS!!!!

I HAVE discussed several of these already with my friends including both human and muppet casting but i will spare you the details

just kidding you get SOME details ok

5. Muppet Les Miserables. I think this goes without saying. It would be tricky to cast all the female roles but that's where we make use of human actors, as well as putting other Muppets in drag (especially nonbinary icon Gonzo)

4. Muppet War and Peace. People say it couldn't be done, it's too long, it's too tragic. I think it's possible. Miss Piggy is Natasha, Kermit is Pierre, a human actor is Andrei, Sam Eagle is Napoleon, I could go on. (Can you tell i like 19th century novels)

3. Muppet Dracula where Robert Pattinson and Kristen Bell are the two humans featured (this is not my idea, it's a text post somewhere but I need it)

2. Muppet Victor/Victoria. TELL ME this would not kill and eat. Miss Piggy as Victor/Victoria, Gonzo as Toddy, Kermit as the Chicago mafia guy. Bonus points if Julie Andrews has a cameo.

Muppet Pride and Prejudice with Gonzo as Jane Austen in the vein of Muppet Christmas Carol! This is the one I have created the most detailed version of in my head. My controversial opinion is that Miss Piggy and Kermit wouldn't be Lizzie and Darcy--those would be human actors. They'd instead be Jane and Bingley!

[docgold13]

365 Marvel Comics Paper Cut-Out SuperHeroes - One Hero, Every Day, All Year…

October 25th - Blade the Vampire Hunter

Eric Brooks was born in London in the late 1920’s.  His father, Lucas Cross, was a member of a secret mystical society known as the Order of Tyrana.  Sought out by the Latvian authorities, Cross sent his pregnant wife Tara to England.  There she took the name ‘Vanessa Brooks’ and found shelter with another member of the Order of Tyrana. Tara experienced labor complications and sought out a doctor’s aide.  Unfortunately, this doctor was actually the vampire known as Deacon Frost.  Frost feed on Tara as she gave birth to her son.  The process caused the newborn to become a human/vampire hybrid, also known as a ‘Dhampir.’ Frost was driven away before he could slay the child, but Tara perished, leaving the orphaned Eric Brooks to be raised by members of the Order of Tyrana who kept him safe in a Soho brothel.    

In his youth, Eric encountered the American vampire hunter, Jamal Afari, who saved him from a vampire attack.  Atari would go on to become a mentor and father figure to Eric, training him in the ways of hunting vampires.  As a Dhampir, Eric possessed many of the strengths and abilities of a vampire without their weaknesses nor need to feed on human blood.  Along with a greatly elongated lifespan, Eric possesses enhanced physical attributes, speed, strength and durability, as well as any ability to heal rapidly from injury or sickness.  These powers made Eric a truly formidable vampire hunter.  He took on the name ‘Blade’ and quickly became a renowned and feared hunter of the undead.  

Blade fought alongside the Allied Forces covert team, The Secret Invaders, during the Second World War.   Thereafter he relocated to the United States and joined up with a team of fellow hunters tracking Count Dracula.  In the 1970’s, Blade traveled to New York and became a member of a team of heroes retroactively known as the Mighty Avengers.   The team disbanded after they succeeded in bringing down the evil cabal called The Deathwalkers.  

Blade continued his pursuit of Dracula, spending the next few decades chasing the vampire lord whilst also taking down numerous vampire threats all over the world.  This included numerous battles with the proto-vampire, Morbius.  Blade later teamed up with Hannibal King, a vampire who refused to feed on humans.  Blade and King joined forces to hunt down Deacon Frost, the vampire who killed Blade’s mother.   After finally killing Frost, Blade and King sought out the Darkhold, a magical tome that contained an incantation that could destroy all vampires.  They succeeded in their mission and Dr. Strange cast a spell that seemingly killed Dracula and all over vampires on earth.   Blade would go on to act as a member of the Midnight Sons, seeking out new mystical menaces threatening mankind.  

The ‘Montesi Formula,’ the conjuration that had destroyed all vampires, weakened and ultimately dissipated completely, leading to the return of vampires and Count Dracula.   As such, Blade resumed his vampire hunting and ended up having to face his father, Lucas Cross, who had himself been transformed into a vampire.  

Blade would go on to serve in the British governmental superhero team, MI-13 and later aided the X-Men in their battle against the forces of Dracula.  Blade has additionally served as a member of both the newer iteration of The Mighty Avengers as well as the main Avengers squad.  

Actor Wesley Snipes portrayed Blade in three films from New Line Cinema and actor Sticky Fingaz portrayed the hero in the Blade television series; whereas actor Mahershala Ali is set to play the role of Blade in the Marvel Cinematic Universe.  The hero first appeared in the pages of Tomb of Dracula #10 (1973).

[agentnico]

Sympathy for the Devil (2023) Review

It's Collateral in the desert, with the Cruise out and in with the Cage.

Plot: After being forced to drive a mysterious passenger at gunpoint, a man finds himself in a high-stakes game of cat and mouse where it becomes clear that not everything is as it seems.

I do hold a special place in my heart for the acting enigma that is Nicolas Cage. He's truly like no one else, with his over-acting techniques and outrageous performances consistently being enjoyable and interesting to watch, even if he is stuck in a dumpster fire of a movie, and boy there are many turkeys on his filmography! Lately, however, Nicolas Cage has been actually allowed to appear in some solid films, with the wonderfully weird psychological hallucinogenic trip in 2018's Mandy where Cage loses more shit than he usually does; to the hilarious 2022 flick The Unbearable Weight of Massive Talent where Cage played himself and gave us the best friend duo we never thought we needed in himself and Pedro Pascal; and this year appearing as Dracula in Renfield. Yep, there was also that Western dud earlier this year called The Old Way which was the most boring interpretation of the Wild West possible where even Cage was on low form, but the less we mention that the better. Be sure to look out for my Top 10 Worst Movies of 2023 list end of the year - The Old Way will surely be making an appearance. Anyway, enough with the shameless self-marketing of my own blog - let's discuss the new Nicolas Cage movie that's gracing our screens!

Sympathy for the Devil is a very by-the-numbers kidnapping movie, that is definitely inspired by the Michael Mann 2004 thriller Collateral, which involves cab driver Jamie Foxx driving around Tom Cruise's assassin as he completes his dirty work. Thrilling movie by the way - can recommend it! As for Sympathy for the Devil, there is nothing new here or original. There's some fun camerawork taking advantage of the neo-noir lighting of Las Vegas at night, and most of the events that transpire are in this one car with these two characters was simplistic yet director Yuval Adler managed to keep this limited setting engaging. Reminded me a bit of that Tom Hardy 2013 drama Locke where he spends the entire movie driving his car and talking to folks on the phone. The script however is very weak, and the twist at the end of the film is extremely predictable, so the movie sorely relies upon its two central performances.

Luckily the two lead actors do solid work. Nicolas Cage is given yet another shot to give an unhinged crazy performance as the maniacal stranger, and he's given a physical makeover too with red dyed hair and a flashy red suit jacket. A lot of the film is spent on him giving out goofy line readings and monologues while rolling his googly eyes and being general Rage Cage. Joel Kinnaman brings vulnerability and humanity as the innocent driver who simply wants to get to the hospital to his wife who is giving birth to his third child. Kinnaman especially can be a very intimidating and strong presence as he's done before in The Suicide Squad as soldier Rick Flag, so seeing him here stripped down was definitely an interesting casting choice.

Overall Sympathy for the Devil is not particularly memorable, with there being no devil in the details of the script. However if you want another excuse to watch Nicolas Cage do his maddenic lunatic thing, then it will be an enjoyable 90 minutes to pass the time. Can't say I'm not a little disappointed - the trailer made the movie seem like much more of a deranged experience than what the final product turned out to be. Ah well, no sympathies for the devil this time around.

Overall score: 5/10

[macgyvertape]

Vampire Movie Reviews & Recs

I started “Dracula movie month” in October 2022, but it’s still going after I’ve expanded to watching any vampire movies someone recommends me, since I wanted to watch good vampire movies and not burn out on bad Dracula movies. It was inspired by a cinephile friend of mine who for a Dracula movie night showed Dracula: Pages from a Virgin's Diary, a very artsy and critically acclaimed Dracula film. She then made me a letterbox list and my passion project has gone from there.

Movies are arranged in a loose descending order of how much I liked them, Dracula movies I’ve included ones I don’t like/recommend but general vampire movies are only ones I recommend.

Dracula Movies

Dracula Pages from a Virgin’s Diary: it's a silent dance film and I really enjoyed it despite not having seen a ballet film before. It doesn’t differ too much from the book, it emphasizes xenophobic reactions towards Dracula, but the format of the movie makes the story feel completely new and different. 

Shadow of the Vampire: 10/10 I really enjoy metafiction movies, and where the humans are as monstrous as the actual monster. The bit where the vampire talks about how lonely he is and how sad Dracula from the novels would be, is a stand out great scene. 

Dracula (1992):  (8/10) big spectacle with the all star cast, costuming, and makeup. I enjoyed how it mostly followed the book UNTIL they added “Mina is Dracula’s reincarnated wife” which I thought was a worse change to make it romantic vs the horror of it in the books. Was not expecting the explicit werewolf fuck scene, congrats to monsterfuckers, and it made the other topless scenes feel par for the course. 

Nosferatu the Vampyre (1979): a remake of the 1922 movie with color and audio, and wow that ups the creep factor. It fleshes out more scenes from the original movie but is otherwise it's a very faithful remake. 

The Legend of the 7 Golden Vampires (1974) - (7/10) really Dracula in name only, interesting cross between Hammer Horror Dracula movie and a 70s kung-fu martial arts movie. The action scenes are fun and it features Chinese hopping vampires who aren’t usually shown in Western movies. It was delayed for release in the US then went through a hack job edit and was released as “The 7 Brothers Meet Dracula” and it's astounding how much worse the editing is. 

Nosferatu (1922): I’m not used to silent movies, but I found it interesting to watch it after Shadow of the Vampire, which is a fictionalized account of the urban legend that the actor who played Count Orlock was actually a vampire.  It's the first vampire movie made so it was hugely influential on the genre and it's credited with starting the idea sunlight kills vampires. 

Blade 3: the only Blade movie with Dracula; Dominic Purcell is hot and Ryan Renolds is funny comic relief, but I fully acknowledge as a Blade movie this is a mediocre sequel

Van Hellsing (2004): Dracula is in this one but it's really a 2000s Hugh Jackman pulpy action flick, overall fun campy action movie with a lot of classic horror monsters. The ending is thematically fitting but I don’t enjoy it. 

Dracula 2000: Hellsing keeps Dracual alive for his blood, then he is unknowingly freed in the year 2000. The movie is very dated in a lot of ways, to the point of being a bit of a time capsule. Some of the action scenes were creative, and they tried to make Dracula hot and sexy but I wasn’t impressed. 

Lair of the White Worm: (5/10) Wow I’m so used to older Peter Capaldi that it took me a minute to recognize him. A loose retelling of the Bram Stoker’s other book that has basically the same plot as Dracula, with B-movie horror snake monsters and fan service topless scenes

Brides of Dracula (1960): 4/10 a Hammer Horror movie but Dracula isn’t actually in this at all. I found it overall pretty boring and cliche; woman in new place trusts the wrong guy, and it turns out he’s a vampire who wants to prey on the innocent.

Dracula (2006): 2/10  it looked and felt like a low budget direct to dvd movie, where Lucy marries Athur who is an asshole and brings Dracula to England thinking he can be controlled. There's a really bad sex scene with way too much finger in mouth kink.

Dracula Untold: 0/10 Somehow they made "dude driven to questionable measures to protect his family" into a snooze fest that isn’t even a fun period piece and Dracula was written as justified the entire time so he’d stay “sexy vampire man”. 

Dracula 3000: -1/10 interesting premise of Dracula and crew trapped on spaceship Demeter ruined by how the black characters are extremely racist stereotypes and an awful script. 

Non Dracula vampire media I enjoy:

Only Lovers Left Alive: 10/10 really great directing and sound, it's as much about being tired with life, deeply in love with someone, drugs, and a shitty sister in law showing up as it is being an immortal vampire; it’s a very enjoyable character study movie

Blade 1: the blood sprinkler opening is iconic its so great in setting the tone and is a visual spectacle, it's a fun action movie. Technically one of the first marvel superhero movies, but better than most with witty quips that don’t kill the tone. Some unintentionally very funny moments of poorly aged CGI

WWDITS Show: really enjoy this series for the comedy and the characters, part way through season 2 it really started to find its footing separate from the movie. 

Interview With the Vampire show: both a remake and re-contextualization of the movie, it’s really well produced period drama that is the most explicit version of the Louis/Lestat relationship

Underworld 2003: fits in with early 2000s everyone looks good in leather and trench-coats. Not the best film making but lots of credit for me being able to see what’s going on during night scenes. This is absolutely one of those “didn’t make enough at box office but sold well enough on dvd for sequel” films that don't get made now. (fair amount of recognizable actors including young Wentworth Miller)

WWDITS - iconic vampire slice of life comedy, a breath of fresh air in the 2010s vampire movie genre. 

Interview with the Vampire Movie: I can see how it became a cult classic, and it's a good high budget 90s vampire movie. I enjoyed watching it after I watched the show, they both feel very different despite covering the same book

Near Dark (1987) - Its as much a 1980s western as it is vampire movie, the basic plot of a guy who is attracted to a girl falls in with a “bad crowd” and the love of his family has to rescue him but with vampires. Rare example of a Confederate Vampire who the narrative positions as a horrible person. Think it's funny the guy was literally asking to be turned into a vampire when he did the asshole move of "have to kiss me before I'll drive you home". 

Underwood Evolution 2006: recommend stopping here with the series. The plot isn’t as coherent as the first movie, but its still fun action-horror and the main antagonist has a really cool transformed vampire form. Amazing how many gunfights there are in this series but the bullets do almost nothing. 

Blade 2: by Del Toro, so cool monsters but the plot is not as good as Blade 1. Norman Reedus is in this and I didn’t recognize younger 90s him at all. 

Abraham Lincoln Vampire Hunter: the tone clashes as it bounces around between ridiculous action of “what if the leaders of the Confederacy were all vampires that President Abraham Lincoln fought” and trying for serious emotional character moments. It gets a place on the rec list because as a Southerner: fuck the Confederacy

[moonmothmama]

now i'm thinking about muppet dracula casting

ok ok thoughts. obviously Kermit and Piggy are Jon and Mina. who else? Gonzo is Van Helsing and Rizzo is Van Helsing's little rat pal. Quincey is Fozzie Bear. Bunsen Honeydew is Dr. Seward. Beaker is there sans explanation. Lucy is Janis because we don't got a lot of girl muppets, which logically makes Arthur Floyd, but idk, i'm getting Scooter vibes for Arthur. The old man that Lucy and Mina talk to is split into Statler and Waldorf. Sweetums is an attendant at the sanatorium, and Renfield is the only human actor (he is played by Christopher Eccleston). Dracula is Count Von Count. which is horrible but this whole thing is horrible so let's just go with it. alternately a custom Dracula muppet but that feels like the coward way out