#edit: forgot to add the source!!

[spitbruise]

Source

[wingsoverlagos]

Lewisohn vs. Wenner Pt. 2 of 2

Part 1 // More Tune In analysis

You probably know the drill by now: I'm looking at the quotes from Tune In against the source Mark Lewisohn gives for them, and seeing if they're faithfully reproduced. This post deals with the multi-source Frankenquotes that are partly attributed to Jann Wenner's interviews. Five of the quotes here are from the infamous Lennon Remembers interview, with a sixth from a separate interview for Rolling Stone. Lewisohn combines John's words from these interviews with a myriad of other sources: a televised interview of John by Jean-François Vallée (1975), Hunter Davies’ The Beatles (1968), an interview/cohosting spot on The Mike Douglas Show (1972), and an interview with Lisa Robinson for Hit Parader (1975).

Before I get into it, I wanted to take a moment to discuss how I ‘grade’ Lewisohn’s quotes based on the type of source he cites. If Lewisohn is using a recorded interview, there’s some wiggle room in things like punctuation and word stress. When transcribing the same interview, two people might listen to the same phrase and come away with slightly different versions, e.g. “My favorite color was blue, but that changed after the accident in the paint factory,” vs. “My favorite color was blue. But that changed after the accident in the paint factory.” Both of those could be correct interpretations of the same recorded audio, so I can’t fault Lewisohn for changes along those lines when he’s working from an audio source.

There isn’t the same wiggle room when working from text. If I pull a quote from a book, and the book reads, “Now, I love green. It’s so lush,” I can’t change that to, “Now I love green; it’s so lush.” I’m not actually quoting the person who said those words originally—I’m quoting the transcribed and published version of what that person said.

I've taken this into account with these Frankenquotes. If there are punctuation differences between Tune In and the printed version of Lennon Remembers pictured here, I haven’t made note of them. Those same differences in a quote pulled from Davies’ The Beatles will be noted, since Lewisohn is quoting the printed source and not an original audio tape. This becomes a bit confusing when a single “quote” is compiled from different sources, and the bits from one source are graded on a different rubric than the other, but such is the thrill of fact-checking Mark Lewisohn!

Citations at the end. Time stamps refer to this upload of the Lennon Remembers interview.

Tune In 4-12 vs. Wenner p.76 (2:14:41), 18 (36:24)  + Vallée Interview

I haven't been able to track down the source for the middle section of this Frankenquote (it’s from an interview by Jean-François Vallée for the French TV Series Un jour futur, in the episode “Il était une fois: John Lennon.”), nor did I find the first sentence of the third part of the quote. It isn’t in the printed version of Lennon Remembers, and it doesn’t appear before the final sentence in the audio, though perhaps it’s elsewhere on the tape.

This has several classic Lewisohn offenses: stitching together multiple sources, combining distinct sections of a single source into one quote, and phrases omitted without ellipses. I've noted these on the images above.

What I'd like to bang on about is Lewisohn's choice not to clarify who John is referencing at the start of the quote--the "somebody" discussing black music and white bodies. In the original interview, John credits it to either "Michael X or Eldridge Cleaver" (Lennon Remembers gives this as Malcolm X, but it's clearly Michael X on the tape--see end of post for some background on Michael X and Lennon). It's common practice by many authors to clarify ambiguous references like this; Mark Lewisohn even does it in Tune In. He mostly does this in the endnotes (e.g. P-4, 2-22), but he uses a footnote to clarify a song lyric he himself uses in the prose of Chapter 4 (see footnote 4-c). Lewisohn not only fails to clarify who John is referencing here, he does not quote John's attempted attribution.

But maybe this falls under Lewisohn's inconsistent policy of not referencing the future. Still, even without naming the black activist who John references here, this quote is not a reflection of John's mindset in his adolescence: he wasn't sitting at a Quarry Bank chum's house in 1956, thinking "gee, thank goodness this black music has reconnected me with my middle-class white body!" The use of the above quote is foresight in and of itself, so why not credit the person who originated that line of thinking? Are Lewisohn's footnotes only for pronunciation guides and details of how demonstrably effeminate certain Beatles' relations were? For someone proclaiming their book a "social history", it's a bit of an oversight.

It's Eldridge Cleaver, by the way, in his prison memoir Soul on Ice (1968). It's in the chapter titled "Convalescence," in a discussion about the Beatles and white rock 'n' roll. Be forewarned if you seek it out, that section is also heavily homophobic.

Tune In 6-7 vs. Wenner p.133 (3:53:54) + Davies p.33

Hunter Davies did not record his interviews with the Beatles, as described in the introduction to the 2009 edition (p.lxiii): “I also wish now that I’d used a tape recorder. I never have done, which is silly.” Since we know Lewisohn was working with Davies’ written word, he was not at liberty to make changes like the one we see here: Davies starts a new sentence at the word “But”, which Lewisohn combines with the preceding sentence. There are changes like this throughout the quotes pulled from Davies’ work, but that’s a matter for a later post.

The other change Lewisohn makes here is more consequential. When discussing how Paul came to join the Quarrymen, John says, “That decision was to let Paul in.” Lewisohn gives the quote as “[my] decision was to let Paul in.”

Perhaps you’re thinking, “He’s used brackets! It’s fine!”, but I disagree. Brackets can be used when changing the tense of a quote, or when changing a word to clarify the meaning of a quote, so long as doing so doesn’t change the meaning. Clarification isn’t necessary here: the quote, as stated by Lennon, would make sense in the context Lewisohn provides. There’s no confusion about what decision John is discussing here.

But this change isn’t simply superfluous—it actually changes the meaning of the quote in a way that’s only clear if we look at the source. Here’s what immediately precedes the quote:

“I met Paul, and I made a decision whether to—and he made a decision too—whether to have him in the group or not.” Emphasis mine.

So John is not talking strictly about his decision, he’s talking about Paul and his mutual decision to work together. Without this context, even without the change from “that” to “my”, John seems to be discussing his own decision. Lewisohn’s change is completely unnecessary to get across his point. It’s as if he made this change specifically to push back against John Lennon’s assertion that a young Paul McCartney had autonomy and didn’t simply exist to satisfy John’s whims.

Tune In 8-4 vs. Wenner p.133-4 (3:54:42) + Davies p.44-5

Color-coded to show the absolute chopped salad Lewisohn made of these two sources.

Also of note is Lewisohn’s follow-up to this quote, “Despite this frank if uncharitable purge of his feelings….” Lewisohn does this elsewhere (notably with John’s quote about hitting women): he follows up a self-critical quote from John with an authorial “Aw, don’t be so hard on yourself, buddy!” It’s unnecessary.

Tune In 8-28 vs. Wenner p.140 + The Mike Douglas Show

Lennon: He’s the greatest rock ‘n’ roll poet, and I really admire him. Douglas: Do you feel the same today as you did years ago in Liverpool about rock? Lennon: When I hear rock, good rock, of the caliber of Chuck Berry, I just fall apart and I have no other interest in life. Y’know, the world could be ending if rock ‘n’ roll’s playing, y’know. It’s a disease of mine.

I wasn’t able to find this quote in the interview audio, but I’m sure its there somewhere. I used Lennon Remembers as a guide to find the correct location of a certain segment in the 4+ hour audio, and it is apparent that certain parts of Lennon Remembers have been reordered.

I transcribed this section of the Mike Douglas Show from a video posted on the Shanghai-based streaming app BiliBili - see link in my source list.

Lewisohn uses an ellipsis to indicate a transition between two totally different sources here but does not use an ellipsis to indicate the phrases he left out of the Wenner interview. There are several small changes to the quote from the Mike Douglas show as well, but the meaning is retained.

Tune In 22-78 vs. Robinson 1975 + Wenner p.122 (1:33:20)

The first source here is Lisa Robinson’s 1975 interview with John for Hit Parader. You can find a version of this interview here. Note the lack of ellipsis between the purple and pink sections, despite the lengthy omission between them.

Lewisohn does use an ellipsis in the Wenner-derived portion of this quote, but he doesn’t place it correctly. The omission occurs between “and” and “Brian”, not between the rest of the quote and “and Brian.”

It wouldn’t make sense to include Allen Klein and Yoko Ono in this quote as it appears in Tune In, since they won’t appear until much later in the series, but I do wonder if presenting the quote without their names truly preserves the quote’s meaning. However you feel about them personally, Allen Klein and Yoko Ono are two of the most controversial figures in Beatles’ history. Within a few years of this interview, John would be on the outs with Allen Klein. John describes himself as someone who “make[s] a lot of mistakes character-wise”, and goes on to list three examples of his good judgments. Two of those are Allen and Yoko. Is it intellectually honest to delete those two names from the list and present Brian as the one example of John’s character judgment?

And our final Wenner Frankenquote. This one isn’t from Lennon Remembers, but from a 1970 Rolling Stone article titled “The Beatles: One Guy Standing There, Shouting ‘I’m Leaving’.”

Tune In 22-72 vs. Wenner 1970 + Robinson 1975

This one is audacious enough to warrant its own post—and we’re in luck! I defer to @mythserene's post for proper analysis. You can also find this one discussed in @anotherkindofmindpod's "Fine Tuning: Ep 7 Spanner in the Works."

In brief, in the ‘quote’ lifted from Wenner’s interview, John is using “Epstein” as a stand-in for Klein. John’s not saying “Three of us chose Epstein”—he’s saying “Three of us chose Klein, throw aside your assumptions about him for a minute.” It’s not the sort of quote you can divorce from its context if you have any credibility.

Some Context on Michael X and John Lennon:

Michael X (a.k.a. Michael Abdul Malik, born Michael de Freitas) was born in Trinidad and became a prominent member of the black Power movement in 1960s London. Lennon met Michael X early in 1970 and became a devoted supporter and advocate until Malik’s death in 1975 (Wiener 1991, p.115-123). Here’s a brief rundown of their involvement:

Since you’re the sort of person who reads citation-by-citation analyses of Beatles books, you have probably seen pictures from early 1970 of John and Yoko sporting matching pixie cuts. In January 1970, John and Yoko shaved their heads (as a publicity stunt, I assume?), and kept their shorn hair in a bag. This bag of hair was the centerpiece for their first public interaction with Michael X: in February 1970, Lennon and Ono gave Malik their bag of hair, and he gave them a pair of Muhammad Ali’s shorts. The press was very much present, but they failed to make headlines (Doggett 118). The hair was supposed to be auctioned off at Sotheby’s to support Malik’s Black House, but this fell through (see Lennon on The Dick Cavett show here.) Pictures of the event can be seen at The Beatles Bible.

Malik fled London for his native Trinidad when legal issues loomed in 1971. He started a commune there, which John visited in April of the same year. In 1972, the bodies of Joseph Skerritt and Gale Benson were found on the commune (Weiner 1991, p.118). Malik was convicted of ordering the killing of Skerritt and would be hanged for that crime in 1975 (NYT 1975 May 17).

Malik may or may not have ordered Skerritt’s murder, but regardless, he did not have a fair trial. John and Yoko campaigned from the time of his conviction up until his death for clemency, without result (Weiner 1991, p.119-123).

Sources:

Cavett D [host]. 1971 Sept 11. Interview with John Lennon and Yoko Ono. The Dick Cavett Show. Accessed online on 2024 Feb 23. Available from: https://ghostarchive.org/varchive/7kXCnKfdGOY.

Cleaver E. 1968. Soul on Ice. New York (NY): Dell Publishing Co., Inc. 210p. Accessed online. Available from: https://archive.org/details/soul-on-ice-by-eldridge-cleaver/

Davies H. 1968. 2009 Edition. The Beatles. New York (NY): W.W. Norton & Company. 408p.

Doggett P. 2009. You Never Give Me Your Money: The Beatles After the Breakup. New York (NY): HarperCollins. 390p.

Douglas M [host]. 1972 Feb 16. Season 11 Episode 123. The Mike Douglas Show with John Lennon & Yoko Ono. Accessed online 2024 Feb 23. Available from: https://b23.tv/mQMUDg9

Militant Is Hanged by Trinidad After Long Fight for Clemency. 1975 May 17. New York Times.[Internet] [cited 2024 Feb 24]. Available from: https://www.nytimes.com/1975/05/17/archives/militant-is-hanged-by-trinidad-after-long-fight-for-clemency.html

Robinson L. 1975 Dec. Interview with John Lennon. Hit Parader. Accessed Online from www.beatlesinterviews.org. Available from: https://web.archive.org/web/20230409044146/https://www.beatlesinterviews.org/db1975.1200.beatles.html

Wenner JS. 1970 May 14. The Beatles: One Guy Standing There, Shouting ‘I’m Leaving’. Rolling Stone. Accessed online. Available from: https://web.archive.org/web/20231017203039/https://www.rollingstone.com/music/music-news/the-beatles-one-guy-standing-there-shouting-im-leaving-43403/2/

Wenner JS. 1970. 1970 12 08 John Lennon Interview, Rolling STones Lennon Remembers, Complete Unedited [video]. Youtube. 2022 Apr 18, 4:26:50. Accessed 2024 Feb 18. Available from: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-YelhzUbrCE

Wenner JS. 1971. 2000 ed. Interview with John Lennon and Yoko Ono. Lennon Remembers. London: Verso. 151p. Accessed online. Available from: https://archive.org/details/lennonremembers00lenn_0/

Wiener J. 1984. 1991 Illini Books ed. Come Together: John Lennon In His Time. Urbana: University of Illinois Press. 379 p. Accessed online. Available from: https://archive.org/details/cometogetherjohn00jonw/

[seaweedstarshine]

Sources: Nightmare in Silver (+ TV Tropes haha •ᴗ•), Night Terrors, Flesh and Stone, The Day of the Doctor Novelization, The Day of the Doctor, Amy's Choice, The Crimson Horror Novelization, The Doctor's Wife

[pollutionbylimpbizkit]

fred, an intellectual

[relationshipnotfound]

[kangpingyu]

the guitar flirt | leader line + harin | Gravity MV

[stupidanniversaries]

APRIL 12, 2005: a very happy anniversary to my chemical romance & the used's cover of david bowie & queen's 1981 song "under pressure", which was originally released to raise money for the 2004 indian ocean earthquake & tsunami!

[lacrimosathedark]

Bat-Family Nicknames and Insults

So I went off the other day because fans keep having people who aren't Roy Harper call Jason Todd "Jaybird" and now I'm thinking about all the other nickname misconceptions so here's a probably non-comprehensive list of nicknames among the Bat Fam.

(Special thanks to @sohotthateveryonedied for a bunch of my data, she made a whole powerpoint with actual comic panels! Go check that out! Also got some info from @kiragecko who was writing some lists with more specific references.)

This list is an active document and will be edited in the event I find more nicknames or have more to say

Addendum note: I'm more than willing to add something I forgot, but you must have receipts. I'm not just going off of memory. Nothing will be added to this list without proof. If you don't have a source, please don't make a suggestion.

This is aside from assorted common insults and nicknames like jerk, ass, shorty, dude, idiot, etc.. Sidenote, every not-Steph Robin has been called “Little Bird”, “Birdboy” and/or “Wonder Boy” at some point. It’s kinda part of the job lol Secondary side-note, the only ones who REALLY use nicknames for people are Barbara and Jason. And Tim specifically in reference to Damian. Everyone else pretty much uses their names 98% of the time. Final note (sorryyyyyy) generally unless they're funny to me, I'm not including things used only once unless I have gotten vibes that it's a trend. This is an attempt to compile recurring nicknames. So ones noted to be used once are either I can only confirm it happened once but could happen multiple times, or I think it's hilarious.

Alfred Pennyworth

Al/Alf Seems to be a common nickname among the boys.

Alfie Dick, Tim, and Jason have all called him this.

Alfredo Jason called him this at least once and I think that’s funny. Not sure it’s exclusive though.

Mom Dick seems to have referred to him as such once…I’m sorry but that’s so funny.

Alfred also has specific ways of referring to everyone: Bruce: Master Bruce, Mister Wayne, Lad, Bruce, My Son Barbara: Mistress Barbara, Miss Barbara, Miss Gordon, Miss Oracle Dick: Master Dick, Master Richard, Master Grayson, Dear Boy, Young Sir, Young Man, Richard, Dick Cassandra: Miss Cassandra, Young Cassandra, My Dear Jason: Master Jason, Young Sir, Lad, Jason Tim: Master Tim, Master Timothy, Young Master Tim, Lad, Young Sir, Young Man, Timothy, Tim Damian: Master Damian, Young Master Damian, Young Sir, Young Man, Son, Damian

Bruce Wayne

Spooky Oliver Queen calls him this, others might as well but I legitimately have no idea.

Batsy Everyone and their goddamn dog, but Joker uses this notably a lot.

Detective RA'S AL GHUL EXCLUSIVE. I think? But this is how Ra's generally refers to Bruce.

B-Man HARLEY QUINN EXCLUSIVE...I think. She calls him this a lot though.

While Dick and Jason will internally think of Bruce as their father, Dick rarely says so and extremely rarely calls him “Dad”. Jason would only say so mockingly or under pain of a second death. Tim rarely even thinks of Bruce as his father (he didn’t become Robin to be Bruce’s kid, and he doesn’t want to replace his own father—much the same way Dana didn’t replace Janet) and never refers to him as such outside of WE work (where he very much uses that to his advantage). Damian almost exclusively refers to Bruce as “Father” but has called him "Dad". Steph sometimes calls him “Boss”. Everyone usually calls him "Bruce".

He refers to ALL of the boys as “chum” and “lad” at some point. It’s just how he used to talk honestly. He DOES NOT call them “sweetie” or “honey” or anything like that. He DOES, however, speak to small children this way. There are multiple instances of him using "sweetheart" and similar terms when dealing with young children. This differentiation I think is for two reasons. One, Bruce is emotionally stunted and being open with anyone outside of actively comforting is difficult for him, and two, the youngest child he has ever had himself was 9 years old so he's never had a small child he'd be likely more inclined to be extra super soft with.

Barbara Gordon

Babs Most people call her this. Bruce doesn’t seem to though, oddly enough.

Babsy/Babsie Both Dick and Jim Gordon have called her this. Very cute.

Barb/Barbie Nearly exclusive to Jason Todd, actually. I think her dad calls her this once in a while, but specifically Jason calls her this.

Babes A few of her friends call her this, but mostly Luke Fox when they were dating.

Red A few people call her this, but mostly Jason and not real often. Probably cuz we already have a red-head often referred to as “Red” (Pam Isely by Harley) and as to not be confused with the other two Reds in the family (Red Hood and Red Robin).

The High Priestess of Tech More of a reference than a nickname, but I think it’s funny. Dick referred to her as such.

O For Oracle!

Dick Grayson Exclusives because Boyfriend Baby Love Beautiful

Richard Grayson

Dick Everyone calls him this. Almost no one calls him Richard.

Dickie His parents also called him this, along with other people who knew him from Haly’s Circus, but otherwise it’s mostly just Jason.

Dickster I…hate that this is canon lmao. Dick has thought this one in his inner monologue, but Jason has also said it at least once. It’s…Something.

Circus Boy Common insult, Jason uses it a few times.

Tight Ass No comment.

Rob Kinda rare for him and more a Tim thing, but his Titans team call him this sometimes. I specifically remember Wally doing so, and Roy too I think.

Boy Wonderful Not marking this as exclusive because Babs probably used it at one point but, shockingly (or not) this comes from Wally West! Wally has also called his Titans team as a group “Dear Hearts” at least once which is just so fucking cute. Neeeeeerd.

Kid Not exclusive to him, but consistently called this by Slade Wilson/Deathstroke over most anything else.

Marcia TIM DRAKE EXCLUSIVE. A joke between him and Tim, assigning each Bat-boy a Brady Bunch member.

Little Robin MARY GRAYSON EXCLUSIVE. This is where the hero name Robin came from; Dick’s mom used to call him this.

Dickie-Bird JASON TODD EXCLUSIVE. Jason calls Dick this a lot during his weird appearances in Nightwing that I pretend never happened because it was weird and dumb. But it is a canonical nickname. And it’s funny.

Amy Rohrbach Exclusives because Partner Rookie Stud Cowboy Sherlock Mr. Confident

Barbara Gordon Exclusives because Girlfriend (and because she’s funny) Flatterer Boyfriend The Brightest, Sweetest, Most Handsome, Wealthiest Young Bachelor on the Entire East Coast Buckaroo Bucko Candy-Gram Darling Lover Love Hunk Wonder Man Wonder Hound Wonder Former Teen Wonder Twenty Something Wonder Blue Wonder Poor Lovable Naïve Dope Pixie Boots

Cassandra Cain

Cass Pretty much everyone calls her this.

Cassie Some people call her this, specifically the people closest to her; Stephanie, Tim, Barbara, Bruce, and Duke. It’s generally used sparingly, especially considering Tim is close to ANOTHER Cassandra who goes by “Cassie” almost exclusively, so Cass is generally preferred to avoid confusion. But Cassie is tossed around.

Batghoul Possibly Stephanie Brown exclusive, though easy enough that I wouldn’t be surprised if others called her that. She is notoriously spooky.

Bat-Babe KON-EL/CONNER KENT EXCLUSIVE. These two are actually good friends and dated for a short time. They’re very cute. And they met at the time Kon was just…Like That.

Jason Todd

Jay Literally everyone calls him this sometimes. It’s a common nickname.

Jace/Jase Also pretty common, but seems to mostly be among family. Dick and Bruce have at least both called him this.

The Toddster Was called such by Danny Chase, implying they were friends somehow? (Jason didn't have many Titans missions so idk how they were close enough for him to call him that). He calls him that when he discovers Jason’s status in the system is “unknown”, leading him to find out he’s dead.

Rojo Referred to himself as this once while he was still a crime boss, so presumably some of his gang called him this too. Obviously Spanish for red because Red Hood.

Little Bird Possibly exclusive to Barbara Gordon, she called him this in a flashback.

Jan That Dick and Tim Brady Bunch joke. Just imagine one of them looking Jason dead in the eye and saying “Sure, Jan.”

Little Wing DICK GRAYSON EXCLUSIVE. Called Robin Jason this in Nightwing Year 1 and it’s very cute.

Jaybird ROY HARPER EXCLUSIVE. The reason I’m making this post because no one seems to remember that Roy and only Roy has ever called Jason this. But any time these two appear together, it’s usually said at least once.

Stephanie Brown

Steph Pretty much everyone calls her this at one point.

Stephie A few people if I recall, but I know Tim’s called her that.

Blondie Pretty sure a few people call her this, but notably Harper Row.

Damian Wayne Exclusives because He Was A Brat Wench Fatgirl Girl Blunder

Timothy Drake

Tim Everyone to the point where it’s just his name.

Timmy A lot of people call him this pretty teasingly. Dick, Jason, and Babs do it consistently, but that’s older siblings for ya. Bernard has done it too.

Timbo Dick and Jason as well as his friend Ives have called Tim this at the very least. Tim notably doesn't seem to like it, though he has used it himself in a derogatory way in his inner monologue.

Timbers I’ve only ever seen Jason call him this, but I could be missing things. Would not be surprised if Dick did too, but it’s very Jason.

Rob Most of Young Justice called him that up until he revealed his name (which took a while because Bruce was being controlling and overprotective, as he does). Short for “Robin”, obviously, which is all they knew him as.

My Robin I’m pretty sure each member of Young Justice has said this about Tim, though Conner does it the most and has the biggest negative reaction to literally anyone but Tim being Robin.

Cindy DICK GRAYSON EXCLUSIVE. It’s that Brady Bunch joke again!

Little Brother DICK GRAYSON EXCLUSIVE. I didn't originally include it because it had the same vibes as like "dude" or "jerk"; something that's easily tossed around, y'know? And it feels like a descriptor, but it is actually used as a title/nickname several times, especially when Dick is messing with Tim.

Pretender JASON TODD EXCLUSIVE. Though it should be noted, he only directly called him this one time. Aside from that, he more refers to Tim as A pretender, not as like a nickname or title. It’s a description. (like “replacement” was but fandom made that a nickname yes I am in fact bitter)

Duckboy HARLEY QUINN EXCLUSIVE. She says this once, but it’s hilarious so I’m keeping it.

Detective RA’S AL GHUL EXCLUSIVE. Ra’s is very particular about titles. The only other person he refers to as “Detective” is Bruce, and Dick one time in his internal monologue, so he is acknowledging Tim’s competence. And then proceeds to get a large portion of his resources obliterated by Tim <3

Stephanie Brown Exclusives because Girlfriend Sweetie Muffin Boy Virgin

Duke Thomas

Narrows Almost Jason exclusively, though I think Harper has called him this once or twice. In reference to the neighborhood he grew up in, as opposed to Jason and Harper's Park Row aka Crime Alley upbringing.

Newbie Jason calls him this frequently, though it's likely the others have too.

Baby Bird ELAINE THOMAS EXCLUSIVE. Yeah, surprisingly Duke is actually called this by his mom.

Damian Wayne

Gremlin Mostly exclusive to Tim, but Jason has called him this too. This also seems to be Tim’s go-to for Damian when not using his name or codename.

Dami Used by Jon Kent and Talia al Ghul, so presumably those closest to him.

Little D I think Barbara Gordon exclusive but I’m not sure.

Cousin Oliver Not said to his face to my knowledge, but the Brady Bunch in-joke between Dick and Tim.

Prince/Your Highness (other royal variations) A common way to mock Damian for his haughty air and stuck-up attitude. More common in the past because Damian was The Worst and never shut up about being the heir to Batman and the Demon's Head. He's grown a lot since then and this kind of joke is used less. He is still pretty snooty though.

D JON KENT EXCLUSIVE. I have yet to see anyone else call him this at least, and this is how Jon almost always refers to him.

Baby Bird TALIA AL GHUL EXCLUSIVE. I’ve seen her call him this once, and I don’t recall ever seeing anyone else call him this. Just wanted it known that Talia is the only one to call Damian this.

Tim Drake Exclusives because Tim is Petty and Damian was a Brat Little Monster Hobbit Homunculus Little snot Spoiled, vicious and homicidal little punk Heir to the Kingdom of the Damned

Note on how Damian refers to others: Damian usually uses full first names or surnames, depending on circumstance and closeness. He occasionally calls Dick “Dick” or “Richard”, but often calls him “Grayson”. He almost always refers to Tim as “Drake”, but occasionally as “Timothy”.

Fanon names that I dislike

Replacement Jason never once calls Tim this, and refers to Tim as A replacement about as much as Dick did about Jason (Yes Dick has at least once when talking to Bruce referred to Jason as his replacement). How common it is in this fandom to call Tim "Replacement" (with a capital R like it's a name or title!!!) drives me absolutely insane. It's not canon and tbh you can do better. Hell, "pretender" is right there! And Jason's a nerd, he would do better.

Baby Bird Like…it’s cute, but given it’s used in fanon almost exclusively for Tim, and POST DAMIAN, it just feels infantalizing. Especially when the only canon uses are mothers towards their kids. I see this a lot with Dick and Jason using it, which is...just no. Like, Dick, I get it, but he's more likely to call Tim "Little Brother". Jason would never allow himself to be seen as this soft to Tim. If he were trying to be gentle with him, he'd probably call him "kid". He's done that before.

Baby Bat(s) I have seen this used literally twice. Once where a goon mockingly called Tim that, and once in an AU where Harley said it to Damian. "Baby Bat" isn't a thing. Sorry.

Big Bird More amusing than anything but a little annoying. No one ever calls Dick that in canon and whenever I read it all I can think of is Sesame Street so unless a giant yellow muppet bird is what you're going for, maybe don't do that lol

Demon Brat/Demon Spawn Not the most egregious thing, especially considering the numerous nicknames Tim comes up with, but the consistency of its usage in fanon is a little frustrating. This is never used in-canon, and if you want to use it in your fanworks, just maybe intersperse it with other more creative nicknames, yeah? It's just unoriginal at this point.

Jaylad I don’t hate this one, but it’s such a huge misconception that it’s canon. Bruce has said “Jay, lad” a couple times because he calls like every boy he meets “lad” and people made up “Jaylad”. Not the worst thing ever, but it's not canon.

Golden Boy I don't actually have a problem with this one, but I may as well clear up that this is canon as a descriptor but not as a nickname for Dick. Like calling Jason "the dead Robin". Like, people have said that about him in-canon, but they haven't called him that. The common derivative "Goldie" is entirely fanon.

Non-canon nicknames I think are funny

Dick-face/Dickhead I’m sorry, I find it hilarious whenever someone (usually Jason) in fanfic calls him this. It’s also to me just a silly exaggeration of the obvious joke that has been made at least once (but probably several times by now) in canon about someone being about to call Nightwing a dick and someone else reminding them not to use names in the field. I think it’s hilarious.

Timberly I can’t tell you why this specific deviation of Tim is funny to me but it is. And I'm surprised I haven't seen Jason call Tim this in canon.

[incorrectquoteswwdits]

IN WHICH I HAVE NEWS. Someone was kind enough to send me a spoiler for episode one.

THIS IS AN ACTUAL SPOILER DO NOT PROCEED IF YOU DO NOT WANT TO BE SPOILED.

SERIOUSLY

“Crowley is an Angel creating star systems who calls for a lesser Angel to help him and Aziraphale appears! Aziraphale introduces himself but Crowley as an Angel kinda brushes that off and doesn’t give his name, heavily implying he is either someone important so the name is withheld or it explains why he have his name in Eden cuz Aziraphale never got it the first time. Crowley has white wings and matching white and gold outfit to the angels , and NO SNAKE EYES and cute little Curley red hair”

THERE IS ALSO A SECOND SOURCE THAT HAS CONFIRMED THIS TO BE REAL. Except they describe Crowley’s hair as ‘shaggy’

YOURE WELCOME

EDIT: forgot to add that Angel Crowley used to be very smiley and bubbly! 🥲

[licollisa]

Im so so so so sorry for the dm but I gotta do, how did you do the lighting for these two??

https://twitter.com/Licollis_a/status/1657703869068234754 https://twitter.com/Licollis_a/status/1657631596198125569

(dm wouldnt send on twitter so I'll send it here!)

Be not afraid, for I will reveal my secrets in rendering step by step.

1. After I'm finished with lineart, I added the base color. It's faint, but putting in gradient will make it pop.

2. In order for the whole thing to look harmonious with each other, on top of the base color I added a multiply and overlay layer. The color I use for multiply is usually desaturated, kinda pastel-y. The overlay one is more saturated (see alternative colors below).

3. The result should be kind of dark. Which is what I'm after, because what you're seeing is already shadowed. So instead of adding the shadow to the base color, I'm adding the light.

On top of the multiply layer, I added an overlay layer. I keep in mind where the light source is coming from (see the blue arrows). The color of the overlay can be whatever -- it depends on the vibe you're trying to make (e.g if they're in waterfall, I'd use light cyan).

Also, see that normal layer clipped onto my overlay? It's how I added my "fringe" (aka subsurface scattering). I often use pink. Just line it on the edges of the light.

4. Now I added a multiply layer again, just to give the piece more depth and details (like the skin)

5. Now I'm adding what's called reflective light (google to see examples irl). Basically, I covered the darkest parts of the drawing with something lighter. For this one I just added pastel purple in the normal layer, but there are other layer types to lighten it up!

6. Now, I colored the lineart through clipping. I usually just matched the surrounding colors by adding a darker one (e.g dark red for skin).

Optional: I like to make 2 copies of the lineart, make one red and another cyan, and respectively slide it to left and to right. Sometimes it doesn't even look good tho....

7. Highlights time! To do this I disable the background so it's transparent, click right and choose 'merge visible to new layer'. Which flattens the visible image onto a new layer. Now I can add in these white lights by clipping on top of it!

(It's a lil tricky to do this right with a brush, so I used the lasso fill tool.)

To top it off, I add some sparkes. My simp art is done <33

Edit: I forgot!! By the end of it all you can add a texture by setting said texture into overlay with low opacity (on top of the finished art). In CSP you can add a perlin noise, one of these:

You can use other kinds of textures for ur artwork, like watercolor etc.

[markantonys]

wotseries posted an alleged elaida audition script about 1) her telling presumably leane that she's at the tower to look for elayne and also that siuan's in a big mess and she could use elaida's help in cleaning it up, and 2) her discussing prophetic powers with min.

the first scene is pretty standard with what we've been predicting for elaida and the white tower plotline in s3, so i don't have any commentary on that one for now (though it does imply that, indeed, we'll be setting up the coup to be a slowburn season-long event with elaida weaseling around for a while before making her big move, rather than a shock event that happens early in the season, but i think most of us were thinking this already anyway).

the second scene is interesting because a different leak had placed min in tanchico. wotup's leaks have been flagrantly incorrect before (said faile would be in s2) and wotseries' audition scripts have also been flagrantly incorrect before (said gawyn would be in s2), so at this point it's just a question of which source i distrust more, and i can't answer that haha so for the time being i'll treat both Min Locations as equally plausible. (i'm assuming it'll only be one or the other because i find it hard to imagine that she could make an appearance in both locations during the course of the season, but i suppose you never know.)

looking at where s2 left off, both are equally plausible. min is in cairhien, and both siuan & co and liandrin are also in cairhien. i could see siuan snatching min back to the white tower because she knows about her powers and wants to use them, and i could also see liandrin snatching min over to tanchico because she considers her a liability after min betrayed her/didn't follow through on the deal/figured out she's a darkfriend.

looking at min's established story in the show and where her story goes in future in the books (lmao at the statement that min has a story in the books), both are equally plausible. tanchico would put her back into contact with liandrin and mat to follow up on her story with them in s2 and set up for her future seanchan story with mat (and doubly so if there's a seanchan presence or even tuon herself in tanchico in s3). the white tower would return her to her book storyline and, based on this scene with elaida, potentially give her the opportunity to have a storyline exploring the nature of her powers and her relationship with them. either storyline would allow her to go on to cross paths with rand in the next season or two.

(edited to add that tanchico would also have min interacting with elayne to help set up the polycule. i've so thoroughly made the polycule rand/elayne/avi/mat in my mind that i kinda forgot min is the canonical fourth member when i was making this post djkfg)

i will say that in the books, the tower coup has absolutely 0 bearing on min's overall character/story because she has 0 stakes in any of that stuff and 0 connection to aes sedai. it makes for an interesting 1-book storyline for her, but it's never relevant to her again (vs. someone like gawyn who is dealing with the repercussions of the coup in his storyline for pretty much the rest of the series), and so for that reason i wouldn't be sorry to replace her book storyline with an invented tanchico storyline that might have more long-term relevance to her (re: seanchan stuff). however, if the show expands her white tower storyline to include an exploration of her powers, i'd love that because min actively struggling with and trying to navigate and learn more about and figure out how best to use her powers is something that should have been part of her current story rather than her pre-series backstory. and compare/contrasting with elaida and how SHE uses her prophetic abilities would be super interesting!

that being said, i will never again trust any wotseries audition scripts after the utter betrayal that was the gawyn one, so i'm taking this all with a grain of salt! every time they post a new one they're like "disclaimer that scenes could be invented just for auditions and won't appear in the actual show, but most of our past audition scripts have appeared in the show pretty close to the audition version" and i'm like "what about that time you misled me to believe a whole-ass boy would be present in s2 and then he wasn't???? is gawyngate a joke to you???" lmao i wish they'd be a bit more cautious with their audition script disclaimers bc *i* think they've been pretty hit or miss, not Usually Accurate (even the aviendha one, only 1 of 2 scenes made it into the show iirc).

[untitledmemes]

Meet Cute Starters / Memes

Nature Edition You decide who is muse A and who is muse B. In case of Multimuse, don't forget to specify which one/s! Reblog, do not repost or add.

🌸 Muse A gets seated next to Muse B at a mutual friend's party.

🌹 Muse A sneaks out onto the porch to away from people at a house party - only to find Muse B already there, having done the same thing.

🏵 Both Muse A and Muse B reach to grab last package of their favorite snack off a high shelf at the same time.

🌻 Muse A is used to run their missions alone. This time, they got paired up with rookie, Muse B.

🌴 Muse A needs to deliver something to Muse B's neighbor, but they are not home and not answering their phone. They knock on Muse B's door.

☘ Muse A rushes to their office, carrying a large pile of papers, and accidentally bumps into Muse B.

🌲 Muse A received important intel that their target is supposed to be here tonight. Muse B shows up, having received the exact same intel from the exact same source.

🌷 Muse A and Muse B got set up on a blind date by a mutual friend.

🌱 Muse A found an item Muse B lost and has been searching for.

🍂 Muse A and Muse B are in a rush, but there is only one taxi left. They share the ride.

🌺 Muse A and Muse B meet at a concert, wearing the same band T-shirt from the last show of the same band.

🌵 It's a costume party! Muse A and Muse B show up in the same costume.

🌾 Muse A have been making Muse B's coffee for a while now at the local coffee shop. Muse A musters enough courage to tell Muse B their name.

🥀 It's raining, and Muse A forgot their umbrella at home. Muse B offers to share theirs.

🍃 Muse A sits next to Muse B on the same bench at the park.

[gallifreyriver]

Update to this post because a year later they're still trying it.

They vote again tomorrow, March 13th, to try and ban TikTok- only this time they're doing all they can to claim it's not a TikTik ban.

They claim it's to "protect Americans from 'Foreign Adversary Controlled Applications'" despite singling out ByteDance/TikTok specifically, and mentioning TikTok in literally the first sentence.

They also claim it's not a "ban," they're just giving TikTok the "opportunity" to divest from ByteDance and sell it's company, algorithms and source code to a non-communist county (the US) within 180 days or the US will take action and make the app inaccessible to USA Americans, which make up 150 million of TikTok's user base, the largest TikTok audience by country so far.

One could call this a shakedown, that effectively the US is trying to steal a popular and profitable company. "That's a nice company you got there, be a shame if you... I don't know... lost 150 million users- Wouldn't it?"

[Edit: Forgot to add that even though the US has 150 million TikTok users, that's still only like 8%-ish of TikTiks total userbase- making this "shakedown" an example of how Congress is embarrassingly USA-centric. TikTok will not sell just to avoid losing just 7%-8% of it's userbase, and Congress must know that- if not, that just proves the point even more. This bill is for all intents and purposes a BAN, regardless how they try to spin it, and they're being very USA-centric and Xenophobic about it]

Anyway-

This is the second vote. A House committee voted unanimously on Mar. 7th to advance the bill, and it will be voted on again by a Republican controlled House.

Please call or email your representatives and tell them to vote "No" on bill H.R. 7521.

This isn't about just losing an app. TikTok is unique in that it is currently the easiest place to organize and spread information that otherwise doesn't get as much coverage. It allows for real time coverage and updates by those living through major events going on around the word, and has allowed for increased awareness for such events that we likely wouldn't hear about otherwise. (i.e: the genocide in Palestine, Cop City, any of the bills trying to take trans rights/abortion rights away, etc)

If you don't know your representatives, just google "who are my representatives" and the first results should be links that will help you find them based on your zip code

And if you don't know what to write I can help you there too.

You can write something as simple as just:

Vote "No" on bill H.R. 7521.

Seriously, that's all you need.

Or, if you want something a little more in depth, here's a script that you can either copy and paste or reword to your liking. I just re-worded the script from the ACLU link above to fit more specifically about the current bill (Though let's be honest, for all intents and purposes Congress is pulling the same shit in a different hat)

Dear Representative, I’m writing today to strongly urge you to protect our constitutional rights to free expression and to receive information, and to vote no on any bill that would give the federal government the power to ban entire social media platforms. Bill H.R. 7521 is designed to allow the government to ban TikTok in the US and would likely result in bans of other businesses and applications as well. Given what we know about TikTok, it’s clear that a ban would violate the First Amendment rights of millions of Americans who use the app to communicate and express themselves daily. Should these bills move to a vote, I urge you to vote “No.” In a purported attempt to protect the data of US persons from the Chinese government, these bills will instead block Americans from engaging in political discussions, artistic expression, and the free exchange of ideas. We have a First Amendment right to use TikTok and other platforms to exchange our thoughts, ideas, and opinions with people around the country and around the world. Please oppose any bill designed to limit our right to express ourselves — both online and off. Thank you.

Reminder, they vote tomorrow, Wednesday March 13th.

So please reblog this to spread the word and contact your representatives to tell them to vote "No" on this bill.

Do not be mistaken in thinking your opinion doesn't matter- it does matter so much. Do not let yourself be silenced!

[user-without-a-cool-acronym]

the site that leaked the first two episode titles for part 2 has updated

from what i understood from @nyaskitten this is basically french IMDB and thus not completely reliable, but here it goes (i couldn‘t figure out how to get the program to translate them to english, so that version is written separately)

Ep. 11: Beasts of war, august 8

Ep. 12: the wild lightning, august 8

Ep. 13: versus Ras, august 11, Lloyd and the ninja move to rescue their companions Kai and Bonzle(Scolette) and take part in a mysterious tournament that is hosted by the source dragons

Ep. 14: hearing nothing, august 11

Ep. 15: a new world, august 11

Ep. 16: the man with the blue mask, august 11

Ep. 17: to beat ones demons, august 14

That‘s all that‘s there, take it with a grain of salt

edit: forgot to add the link:

[josefavomjaaga]

The Metternichs about Junot

Metternich to Mme Metternich, 14 February 1810 It is with true sorrow that I take up my quill today. Your letter of 26 January contains one of the scenes that show us the people of 1792 and 1793 exposed and naked. Place a being like J[unot] in a very high position, he will drink blood without letting any misgivings stop him.

That’s Metternich reacting to the news of the scandal Junot had caused after having discovered the correspondence between his wife Laure and Metternich, proving they had had an affair. Metternich himself was not in Paris at the time but had left some time after the war of 1809 between France and Austria had begun, and in the meantime had taken over the ministry of foreign affairs in Austria. However, Lorel Metternich with the kids had stayed in Paris, and Junot had dragged her right in the middle of a scene of severe domestic violence that she immediately informed her husband of, with the help of a secret agent Metternich had in Paris, Benoit des Androuins.

Interestingly, Lorel Metternich at first does not mention any involvement of Caroline Murat in this event, she only lists her as one of the people gossipping about it.

Other than that, Lorel apparently behaved as prudently as she could once she had entered Junot’s house. According to the letter by Androuins, Junot had forced Laure to write a message to Lorel, urgently inviting her over. On entering, Lorel found Laure Junot crying on the sofa, hiding her face in both hands. - According to Laure’s own journal intime, the last hours had been a nightmare for her, including attempted rape and attempted murder. - Once Lorel Metternich was in the room, Junot locked the door behind both women and started to rage against Metternich, demanding Lorel take revenge upon him etc. The only thing Lorel answered was: "But you are mistaken, Monsieur le Duc. This is not my husband’s handwriting." - Despite the fact she had obviously recognized it. Again, according to Laure’s journal intime, she at some point managed to silently ask Laure if she could do something for her.

Despite Lorel’s calm reaction, the scene must have scared her a lot. At least she seems rather relieved to learn that the Junots were to leave the capital, when she writes to her husband:

Bluebeard has finally left with his amazon and, as I am assured, probably never to return.

"Bluebeard" obviously referring to Junot.

Edit: Forgot to add the source for the two letters: Conti, "Metternich und die Frauen", Vol. 1 - The description of what may (or not) have happened during the night when Laure was alone with Junot are a brief summary of the excerpts from Laure's "journal intime" quoted in Toussaint du Wast, "Laure Junot". It is to be noted that this "journal intime" may have been written years after the event for Balzac, and that it is per se unverifiable.

However, Lorel Metternich calling Junot "Bluebeard" at least strongly hints at her, too, being convinced that Junot had physically abused and possibly tried to murder Laure.

Edit II: On second reading, I added an "attempted" to the accusation of rape. Of course, by the reasoning of the law at the time, rape in the judicial sense would not even have been possible between spouses. Obeying to the husband's needs was the wife's job. - As to Laure's "journal intime", she describes that Junot tried to force himself on her, but claims that she managed to make him stop. (I am not sure I fully believe her.) Junot then at some point attacked her with a pair of scissors, wounding her, before trying to strangle her. He only stopped when Laure was close to loosing consciousness and when he literally saw her blood on his hands. That's how Madame Metternich found Laure on entering.

[j0kers-light]

Your blog is my my favourite after work stress relief! Can I request joker sending reader to get some DNA from batman so he can find out his true identity and maybe they kiss and joker isn't happy at all?

His Lighthouse: A Little Favor (LedgerJoker x f!reader)

A Little Favor - Oneshot

KEEP IN MIND THIS IS NOT A STORY UPDATE!

Hey hi anon!!! 🖤✨

August 10th! I've sat on this ask for... good Lordt. I don't do well with taking breaks but slowly but surely I’m cleaning out my ask inbox! Progress. Anyhoo! I combined this wonderful request with this one! I hope everyone enjoys this oneshot as I continue to rest up my hand. The next chapter will probably be updated next month.

Edit: I'm so happy to know my blog is your after work stress relief! That's why I work so hard to make great content for people to enjoy! Sending love your way! Read this tomorrow after work beloved!

Edit number two: I forgot to add the song choice lol

taglist:

@blackreaderatrisk @twinkledinkle @clemdango04 @l3ejm @tears-of-amber @what-an-angel @darthjokerisyourfather @thatsnoteii @dollster @cheetahspy @kaidennnnn @urdariingdoll @motivation-idontknowher @ins0mniac-whack @spaghettificationandpretzels @reneisance @alittlesmartcookie @ninacutebee16 @carydorse

Wanna be included in the official His Lighthouse taglist? Let me know!

At the end of the day, you had to understand that this was Joker's idea.

He fabricated this crazy idea and dragged you into it. Naturally, it quickly spiraled out of control and yet, it was still his idea.

Joker had no right to be mad at you. You did what was asked of you, although his reaction to it all still hurt. Should you have known getting DNA from Batman would be the catalyst for you and Joker's first fight, you would have said no when he asked you.

At the time it was a far fetched request, it still was, but you saw how much it meant to Joker.

He was stressed out for days trying to orchestrate some outrageous plan with no results so far. He wanted something new and original to annoy Batman with and no run of the mill tactic would do.

Nothing was worse than watching Joker try and scheme and not come up with any ideas. Joker quickly became irritable and moody even towards you.

You tried offering hugs or encouraging kisses but he shrugged you off and continued working on his schemes and useless intel as if they held the answer. You were hurt about being pushed away but decided to work on your work far away from Joker and his bummy attitude.

You were honestly getting fed up with the cold shoulder treatment until Joker literally popped up out of nowhere with an eerie grin on his face. "Bunnnnnnyyyyyy, can ya do me a lit-le favor?"

His cajoling voice should have warned you. It was manipulative and sickly sweet, but it was the only source of attention Joker gave you in days– so you paid it no mind and sucked up his attention like a sponge.

Joker knew you had separation anxiety. He iced you out on purpose knowing you'd do anything for his attention. And Joker wanted you desperate enough to do anything.

What he was about to ask you was no easy task.

"Y-You want me to w-what?" Surely, you heard him incorrectly but Joker just grinned and kissed both of your cheeks, your eyelids, and finally your nose.

He was being too affectionate but it didn't dawn on you at the time.

"Aht aht, you heard me correctly, doll. I want yooooouuu, to, uhh, get D-N-A from my dear friend Batsy." He said it like it was the easiest thing in the world. You weren't sure if he was serious or not.

"B-But how?! I mean, I know the guy– we're on speaking terms," you missed Joker's jaw clenching. "But that won't help me get.. Joker, do you know what you're asking me to do?!"

He did. Joker thought you were the perfect candidate for this job.

You were an innocent civilian and the caped crusader would never suspect someone like you to be up to any nefarious deeds. You could outsmart a fox with your wit and rob someone blind with that smile of yours.

You were perfect for the job. It didn't matter if you succeeded or not, in fact; Joker expected you would fail but he still wanted you to try. There was more to this insane scheme than just getting a sample of DNA, but you didn't need to worry yourself over the details.

"Y/n.. Bunny. Sweetheart! Look at me." He waited until you did and rubbed your pouting lower lip with his thumb, "M'not askin for much. A napkin with some sweat on it, a swab of uhhh, saliva, ideally a piece of hair! It's. Not. That. Hard. Y/n. Do anything it takes. Butttt, don't fail."

During his speech Joker's tone became dark and you knew he was getting serious. It wasn't a request, this was an order.

You still were unsure but you didn't want J upset with you! He trusted you with this task and even though you were underqualified, you'd try your best!

One look into his dark jade eyes made you cave in.

"O-Okay..." You mumbled.

Joker gasped and hugged you close. He then showered your face with kisses and soft, "That's my girl! Thank you, Bunny!" into your ear.

Each little praise made you feel sick to your stomach. Just what did you agree to?

The next day you were a ball of nerves. Joker left a little after lunchtime, leaving you alone with your doubts.

What if you failed? What if you got caught? Should you seriously go through with this?

You were already an accessory by helping Joker with whatever plan he cooked up this week. Although the role was small, you could face some serious jail time– as if harboring a fugitive wasn't already a serious offense. That thought sent you down another spiral. What if Batman figured that out and arrested you? This was a big risk you were taking.

"Okay, Y/n calm down. You're overthinking things. Just stick to your plan, you got this." You psyched yourself up and headed out the door.

Gotham City was full of crime and even busier people.

You usually kept your head down and stayed out of trouble, but tonight, you wanted trouble to find you. The quicker something happened, the quicker the possibility of Batman swooping in to save the day could happen.

Now, you understood that Gotham was a huge place. The population was well over ten million and stretched out between three connecting islands. The probability of Batman coming to save you was negative zero. He had far more important things to do than save a random citizen from petty crime.

However; there was a zero chance of you running into Joker all those months ago when he first escaped, yet here you are. Dating a wanted criminal.

Anything could happen so you applied the same principle to Batman saving you. You sighed to yourself and waited for the walk sign to turn green.

The plan was to get mugged– an easy objective in this wretched city– or be a witness to something bigger. Nothing too violent or dangerous but high profile enough to warrant the bat's attention. It was only eight pm so you had all night to run into the Dark Knight and begin your actual mission.

But first, you needed a bite to eat. Your nerves were shot so you headed over to a nearby corner store that sold hot food. You'd kill for a birria taco right about now.

Joker promised that you would have extra security tonight and that nothing would happen to you on their watch. All you had to do was lure Batman out, get a sample, and book it back to your apartment.

If only things in life went as planned. While you were walking across the street, two men dressed in black nodded to themselves and followed. Around the corner, your security detail got distracted by a rival gang and started a fight, leaving you alone and without backup.

The store's bell chimed when you walked in. The smell of beef and spicy peppers hit you instantly and made your stomach cry out in glee. Rows and rows of convenient food and drinks were inside the store but you ignored it all to head over towards the hot food section. Javi spotted you coming and greeted you warmly.

Javi and his wife treated you like family since you were a regular at their store. You were always polite, a great tipper, and you respect your elders.

Iliana wanted you to join the family for real and matched you with her nephew but you weren't interested and neither was since he stood you up on the first date. You smiled fondly and cast the memory aside. You were happy with Joker even if things recently were a little rocky at present.

You came to a stop near Javi's counter with a heavy sigh. Javi already knew your order and began to prepare it.

"Dang, at least let me pretend to order!" You laughed.

He waved you off. "I know what my hija wants. Birria taco, jalapenos on the side, extra cheese, with four limas, no?"

He laughed at you feying offense. "You ain't gotta call me out like that.. but yes."

Two men bursting into the store carrying guns interrupted the playful banter. Your pension for trouble was impeccable. The night had just begun and already you found yourself in a pickle.

A gun was pointed at Javi's head as a robber demanded the money from both cashiers. Javi started speaking Spanish to stall but paid the price with a punch to the face. Thankfully he was able to hit the panic button as he fell.

"Javi!" You cried out his name as the other thug walked up behind you. He eyed you up and down with a lecherous grin.

A few patrons tried to make a run for it and were riddled with bullets. A hand covered your mouth and yanked you back into a chest before you could scream.

"It would be a shame if I blew your head off. D__n, you fine." You felt the gun dig into your temple followed by a wet kiss trailing down your neck.

The two men quickly took control of the store and then it was just you and Javi in a sticky situation.

Where was your security detail at a time like this?! You blinked back tears as minutes dragged on in a state of dread.

You were forced to watch as Javi was ordered to empty out his cash registers. Thank goodness Iliana wasn't working tonight, the woman had quite the temper and would've been shot if she opened her smart mouth. You on the other hand was smart enough to keep quiet even as the robber got handsy with you. Javi didn't like that one bit but staying calm was the only logical thing to do in this situation.

He locked eyes with you when you whimpered. "It'll be alright, Y/n. Focus on me." You nodded and tried to ignore the stranger groping your body.

"QUIT STALLIN' OLD MAN!" Javi was hit again and forced to empty the drawers faster.

You flinched away from your captor when he nuzzled your neck. "Y/n, that's a pretty name.. Hey whatcha doing later? Wanna come with me?"

Was this man, the same one holding you gunpoint, asking you out? You had no comment and shuddered in disgust when he sucked on your neck harder and humped your leg as his partner did all the work.

Javi tried to reason with the thugs to let you go, but you knew this wouldn't end well.

For starters, neither of them wore any masks. And two, the robber already had his gun raised to shoot Javi when the lights suddenly went out. The store was plunged into darkness and the two goons were immediately spooked. "What the... who turned off the lights?!"

"Ion know man but I don't like it." The gun pressed to your temple wavered. 

Then you heard it. Soft footsteps to your left.

A whooshing sound was heard and then you were pushed away from your captor. Since you had good night vision (all thanks to Joker and his love for the dark) you watched a shadow darker than the night fight off the two robbers.

Batman actually showed up. You were relieved yet curious. Weren't store robberies beneath him?

The fight hardly lasted a minute when the lights were turned back on. The convenient store was secure and you looked around at the aftermath in awe. Two robbers were lying on the floor in pain, a few dead bodies were near the door, and Javi was lying unconscious behind the food counter.

You were the only one left standing as Batman secured the store. You didn't want to follow through with your mission— I mean the man just saved you, but this was your only chance. The Dark Knight looked everything over once more before locking eyes with you.

His footsteps barely made a sound as he approached.

"Are you alright?" His modified voice sent shivers down your spine. It sounded familiar yet so foreign, but this was a friend. You weren't afraid of Batman.

You were however in shock. Getting a sample of his DNA sounded plausible in theory but now as he stood before you, you were humbled real quick.

"Y/n? Did he hurt you?" Batman asked again and reached out to touch your elbow.

You didn't know you were shaking until you collapsed into his arms with a wet sob.

The only sound in the store was your muffled cries. Joker broke his promise and your security detail failed to do their job. You were held at gunpoint and a random man put his hands on you. You could only imagine what Joker would do once he found out. Just thinking about him made you tense up in Batman's arms.

Somehow you had to get DNA from your savior. Your e/c eyes shot up to Batman's concerned ones. They were a lovely shade of blue unlike you've ever seen.

"I.... I uh. I'm f-fine." You mumbled.

Batman's eyes squinted and accessed you pensively. He wanted to say more and parted his lips to do so, but the sound of approaching sirens snapped him back to reality.

Batman sighed and was turning to leave when you stopped him, "Wait! I haven't thanked you!"

"Quit getting into trouble and you wouldn't need to thank me."

Good point. You pursed your lips with a scoff. "... Well I can't guarantee that."

Batman spun on his feet and you panicked. He was leaving and you had yet to get anything off the man! Your window of opportunity was closing so you had to think fast.

You thought back to Joker's request. 'A napkin with some sweat on it, a swab of uhhh, saliva, ideally a piece of hair!' You glanced at Batman's retreating form.

His cowl covered his hair and the black Kevlar suit guaranteed that no sweat was accessible to you. Which left....

"Do anything it takes. Butttt, don't fail."

You squeezed your eyes shut. "Bats wait!"

He wasn't supposed to be here. The panic button Javi hit sent a distress call to the GCPD and since Batman was in the area, he decided to check it out.

It was a simple robbery in progress until Batman realized you were inside.

You had a knack for getting into trouble and you were also very easy on the eyes. Nightwing teased Batman about it constantly. You were a weakness to the Caped Crusader. Whenever Batman heard a crime in progress with victims fitting your description, he dropped everything to come save you.

Bruce had a crush on you and he hoped you reciprocated those feelings.

It was the only reason why you batted your eyelashes, took the time to talk to him (like a human being) and thanked him in your own special way whenever he rescued you. It was the reason why he stopped in his tracks and gave you his undivided attention tonight.

There were a million and one things he could be doing right now yet he waited for your next move.

You rushed over, grabbed Batman by the face, and pulled him down for a kiss. He was caught off guard but you were on a mission. You and Batman had kissed in the past; a chase peck here or there, well before you had met Joker, but nothing like today.

Today, you gave it your all.

Your tongue swiped the roof of his mouth and danced with his tongue to collect the highest amount of saliva you could.

You made this kiss count and made sure it was wet and sloppy. Batman held you close with a strong hand on your waist and you tossed away your guilt of infidelity in order to get what your lover wanted.

Do anything it takes, but you would not fail Joker. He could never find out about this though. 

The GCPD cruisers finally arrived at the scene and Batman shoved you away. He gave you one last heated gaze before he left the way he came. You watched him go as you dug in your purse for the plastic baggie you had inside.

When you were sure he was gone, you spat inside of it and hid it right as cops stormed into the store.

Javi was coming to and so the interrogation began. Your bag burned hanging by your side. You did the impossible, you actually got DNA from Batman! You just hope it was enough.

The first thing you saw when you returned to the penthouse was Joker pacing in the living room.

The last thing you wanted to do was confront Joker after being interrogated by Jim Gordon and his men all night. Joker pounced on you the second he saw you.

Joker grabbed you by the shoulders and shook you roughly. "WhaT. Happened?!"

He already had an idea on what happened. He got a call from a recon team in the area saying you were taken to GCPD headquarters for questioning after being involved in a robbery.

Despite personally sending you into danger, Joker's heart dropped to his stomach. Were you alright? Did you manage to trick Bats or were you unsuccessful? Judging by your defeated face, it was most likely the latter. The report from his men didn't include details yet you never seemed to surprise him.

"I-I'm okay. Javi and I were held at gunpoint at his corner store tonight. People died so I had to make a statement downtown."

That didn't answer his unspoken question so Joker asked you point blank. "Did you get what I asked for?"

You stared at him in disbelief. Joker was perfectly calm in light of what you just said. "Joker? I said I was held at gunpoint tonight."

J smacked his lips with a shrug. "OK? Did ya get what I uhh asked for?"

You blinked in silence. There was no way this was the Joker you knew and loved.

Possessive and yandere Joker would jump at the opportunity to kill anyone who dared lay a finger on you. Mind the fact you were teary eyed! That alone would have a normal Joker on his knees trying to make you happy again. The man in front of you now was all business so you shoved him away in anger.

Joker looked confused by your actions but you didn't care. You were tired of his attitude.

"You promised me I would be safe tonight but guess what? The exact opposite happened! I almost died!"

"But you didn't." Joker interrupted. Your jaw dropped to the floor and his callous remark. It was the last straw.

You were ready to scream. "Unbelievable. Unbelievable! What is wrong with you?! Is your stupid plan to kill the bat more important than my safety?" You saw Joker open his mouth and you quickly cut him off. "Don't answer that."

His response would only break your heart even more. You shook your head and tried walking past Joker but he yanked you back by your arm.

"I won't ask again, Y/n." He glanced at your satchel. You followed his gaze and grew defensive. So you did the impossible after all. He was impressed. "Hand it over."

"Get your hands off me." You fired back.

You were tired and beyond frustrated with Joker. For an entire week he neglected you and your needs and gave you the cold shoulder for absolutely no reason. Yet when you finally do something for his sorry behind, he's the one that gets an attitude? Tough cookie.

You weren't going for it and he would not get to benefit off of your pain. You almost died to get this D.N.A. Screw Joker and his plans, you weren't giving him anything.

Joker just rolled his eyes at you and ripped your bag off your shoulder. You had no time to stop him, it happened so fast. Perhaps you were more tired than you thought.

He stormed straight to the dining room table and dumped the contents of your bag out on top of it. "Excuse me, what are you doing?!" You yelled at him.

You shuffled behind him as pens, crumpled receipts, your lip balm, wallet, etc. fell out of your bag along with a plastic bag that caught Joker's eye. He turned his nose up at the contents since it was a liquid and clung to the plastic.

He held it up to inspect it more closely. "Do I wanna know what this is?" You took one glance at the clear liquid and then proceeded to look away.

Nothing got past Joker. He was too smart and probably identified the contents already as you remained silent. He was only asking to belittle you and that made you even more mad at him. Joker was insulting you left and right tonight.

He shouted your name to get your attention. There was no reason to lie to the man and you wouldn't be nice about it with the way he was acting.

"What does it look like?" You snipped.

Joker wondered how in the world you got spit from his enemy but focused on the other things like your tone.

"Watch it, Y/n." Joker noticed your closed off demeanor and grew suspicious. "How did you geT it?"

Why did it feel like you were in the principal's office? Joker had what he wanted, there was no need for another interrogation tonight. You already went through three at the police precinct.

Joker could pretend that he didn't care all he wanted but the man put the J in jealousy. You were not going to explain how you got that sample. His foul mood stunk up the room and telling him would only make things worse.

You cleared your throat while scratching the back of your neck. "I'm tired after being held at gunpoint to witnessing a murder, to being questioned over and over by the police. It can really drain a girl... so I'm gonna turn in for the night."

You eyed the time with a grimace. It was almost midnight.

Joker knew what you were doing. He hated when you ran from things. The fact you were, was confirmation that you were hiding something.

"You know I hate, uh, re-peat-ting myself but I'll do it one moooore time. How. Did. You. Get. It?" Each word chilled you to the bone and Joker's aggressive aura had you cowering in your boots.

You had never seen this version of Joker before. He was treating you like you were one of his henchmen. And then it hit you. You were. Joker sent you on an errand and he wanted answers, however; you weren't under his employ and you owned him nothing, especially with how he was treating you.

"It doesn't matter how I got it, Joker. You wanted it, so I got it. Honestly, a thank you would suffice. Now move. I'm tired."

You shoved Joker to the side but in doing so, you presented your neck to his gaze. He zeroed in on the fresh hickey blooming on your shoulder. He was too busy this past week to even talk, let alone touch you. It wasn't his work. And then he knew why you were so fidgety and dodging his questions.

His left eye twitched and he saw red.

You were nearing the hallway when Joker caught up with you. You yelped at his sudden appearance but you weren't expecting him to slam you into the wall and yell in your face.

"Are ya too tired after uh, fooling around with Batsy? Really Y/n? Are ya that desperate for attention you'll let anyone touch you?"

You were insulted until you remembered that one of the robbers left a hickey on you before Batman knocked him out.

You tried to tell Joker this earlier but he wouldn't listen. "J.. that's not.."

His fist collided with the hall next to your head, making you jump. It was too close for comfort.

"Shut! Up! All.. I needed you to do was spook the dumb bat! Make him think I wanted to know his true identity! NOT drop your pants for him! Did ya enjoy having sex with your ex?" Your eyes widened in fear.

That was a secret you vowed to take to the grave. How did...

Joker laughed right in your face.

"I know Bat's is an old fling of yours, Y/n. Don't act all sur-prised. Why do ya think I want him dead soooooo badly, hmm? Gotta take out the competition. He asked for it, touchin what's mine. But don't worry, I got juuuuust the thing to handle our dear Bats. But I know you, Y/n. You.. you like to follow instructions. I asked for DNA and I know you got iT. Let's spread your legs and find out just how much of an obedient whore you reall–"

You ended Joker's rant with a loud slap to his face. Joker blinked in shock. He never thought you'd hit him but sure enough, it kinda stung.

You were just as speechless (and a little scared of the consequences) but you wouldn't stand around and be insulted.

Joker slowly turned his head to face you once you gained the confidence to speak your mind. 

"How dare you? I risked my life for you but the only thing you care about is how I got the sample? You wanna know? Fine I'll tell you, I kissed him! I kissed Batman because you asked me to! I was held at gunpoint, groped, and kissed on by a stranger because your men failed to protect me! A guy touched what you think is yours but you only care about me kissing Batman! You don't even care about me and my well-being! I-I watched people die tonight. I feel awful for cheating on you but is it wrong when YOU asked me to?"

He stepped back when you started to cry.

"You can't use me and then get upset when I do anything it takes to appease you! I am not her!"

"You know that I'll do anything to make you happy! This stupid plan of yours was driving you insane all week so I agreed to help but you manipulated me! Am I guilty for what I did? Yes! I am but I shouldn't have to apologize. I was simply following your orders. I did anything it took to not fail."

All was quiet in the hallway as your words sank in. Joker finally saw how much this affected you and he was at a loss on how to rectify this situation. He could start by drying your tears.

"Y/n, please." Joker raised his hands but you slapped them away.

"No. Don't touch me, I'm done. I'm done." You smiled and Joker knew you meant it. You were the only person he knew that could cry and smile at the same time and still look beautiful.

His worst nightmare was finally coming true. You were waking up from your fantasy and were kicking him out of your life. Joker never wanted this day to come but it was happening.

Joker loved everything about you but your eyes were his favorite. They were so expressive, a literal window into your soul. He knew exactly what you were thinking and/or feeling with just one look and today, your e/c eyes told him everything.

You were done.

You stared straight into his green eyes and your gaze didn't waver. Your conscience was clear and with a voice of an angel, you doled out Joker's penance. "Get out of my apartment and don't come back."

Joker slid to the floor just outside your front door in shock.

Perhaps this was one of those out of body experiences people talked about for he felt absolutely numb. He couldn't hear anything and he looked down at his hands only to find them shaking. Joker couldn't believe it. You were done. You wanted him gone and you had every right after what he did.

He failed to protect you, subjected you to a near death experience, and forced you to betray your morals and your loyalty to him— just to follow his orders.

He treated you as if you were one of his hired goons.

He treated you like he did her.

He knew he failed when you pointed out that fact. Joker promised that you'd never be involved with his organization but he broke that promise and sent you out.  How dare he not treat you like the goddess you were? He failed to cherish you and now you were done with him.

His hand came up to touch his sore cheek. You had every right to slap him. You were everything to him and he neglected you to focus more on his work. He betrayed you in the worst way.

You opened his eyes to the path he was leading you down and he felt sick to his stomach.

This past week was stressful but he went too far. He twisted your love and trust and crumbled it up like tissue paper to accomplish his goals. Nothing could rectify this but he had to try. He couldn't lose you. He just couldn't.

Joker was still seated outside your front door like a lost puppy. He considered scratching on the door if that would prove just how sorry he was. He was a fool for manipulating you and dragging you into his world, but he would spend the rest of his days doing everything in his power to earn you back.

Of course, he had no clue how to win you back but if one thing Joker was good at, it was being resourceful. His eye caught the small display case of flowers you kept in the hall off the elevator and a light bulb went off in his head.

He couldn't lose the best thing that ever happened to him. He needed to make a phone call. Joker could only hope that Morgana looked past their differences and helped him.

In the meantime, J kept an eye on you with the security camera app on his phone. You disappeared into your master bedroom and had yet to come out by the time Morgana and Mac arrived many hours later.

They looked at the infamous clown sitting on the floor and shared a look. This was worse than they thought. Morgana was weighed down with items but nudged the blond with her elbow. 

Mac sighed but cleared his throat to get Joker's attention. "Boss? Boss. We got everything you asked for." Mac said on deaf ears. 

Joker was spacing out, staring at your black front door– lost in thought. What if this didn't work? Was this truly the end? He couldn't lose his reason for existing. You had to take him back.

Morgana was getting impatient and adjusted her handful before speaking up. "He's been sitting there all day.." She whispered to Mac and he slowly nodded. He had never seen his employer look so defeated before.

The green haired clown looked like it was the end of the world and he already accepted his fate. But Mac wouldn't be here if Joker didn't have a plan in place to win you back.

Although if this didn't work, then Mac was genuinely concerned for Joker.

J had camped outside your apartment for the entire day, refusing food and water– not wanting to miss if the door opened and you welcomed him back with open arms.

Even Frost came by, not believing it when Mac reported that Joker had 'broken down' outside your place. You and J never fought before so everyone was at a loss on what to do.

"Is she still inside?" Morgana asked out the blue.

Joker came out of his fog, nodding listlessly. He looked up and saw the items he asked them to bring and jumped to his feet to help. Morgana yelped at the sudden motion and almost dropped her stuff. J rolled his eyes but took control back over the situation.

He fished out his phone to check on you. No motion detected for hours. "Hmm. She's been inside her room since this morn-ing. It's now or never."

Joker unlocked the front door and gestured for Morgana and Mac to follow him inside. Morgana glanced around and set down her supplies. When she heard Joker's idea over the phone, it didn't sound plausible, but now looking at the space, he was a mad genius.

He looked at her with an arched eyebrow. "I can work with this." Morgana assured him.

"Great, then I'll grab the rest." Mac sighed. He left the apartment to start hauling supplies up.

For the next few hours, the three of them worked on turning Joker's apology into a reality.

You woke up to the apartment's stereo system crackling to life. What was Joker up to now?

You patted your bed for your phone to check the time. Your eyes blinked in disbelief reading the time. It was close to nine pm. You slept the entire day. Granted, after you kicked Joker out, you showered, and cried yourself to sleep but you didn't think he would bother you anytime soon. You told him to get out and not come back.

But this was Joker here. Since when did he listen to anyone? You groaned to yourself and got out of bed to tell him off again.

This wasn't a small offense that he could sweep under the rug. Joker couldn't treat you like one of his goons and think it was okay. He hurt you with his careless behavior and you deserved an apology.

You knew Joker would never own up to his mistakes and apologize so you had to be an adult and assume responsibility instead. You needed some time away from Joker to think about your next course of action. Sending him away was a spur of the moment decision, one that you regretted making all day. You were never one for separation. Not having Joker nearby ate away at your heart even if you were upset with him.

Good thing Joker always thought two steps ahead of you.

The apartment was completely dark save for a path of lit candles in glass vases, situated in front of your door. You almost tripped on them walking out the door. You rubbed your eyes thinking you were dreaming but it was real.

A trail of light began at your bedroom door and led down the hall into the unknown.

You heard an instrumental playing in the background and immediately teared up. You could smell what lay ahead but it still felt like a dream. The distinct smell of roses in the air told you this was really happening.

Your hardwood floors were covered in roses and candles, creating a sea of red towards your living room.

Rose petals clung to your bare feet but you kept going. You had to see this through. The path kept going until you saw the huge arch made entirely of flowers– no doubt Morgana's doing. It was well over six feet tall and immaculate in design.

Red and pink balloons hung from the vaulted ceiling and their silk string tickled your shoulders as you walked through the dense field.

It was straight out of a romance film, everything was over the top. You had never seen so many flowers in the same room before. There had to be over a thousand individual rose petals lining the floor and over a hundred more stems in luxury vases scattered throughout the room.

You didn't know where to look, it was too much to take in. You were surrounded by roses.

You came to the end of the path and sobbed reading the giant pink balloons that spelled out, 'I'm Sorry.'

They said what Joker could never express.

Your living room was unrecognizable in a sea of roses and the soft glow of candles. Each detail sent your heart aflutter, but there was no Joker to be found. The song continued to play on a loop as the violins and trumpets set the mood perfectly but it meant nothing if Joker couldn't apologize to you directly.

You didn't know how he managed all of this while you slept. This had to take well over four hours if not more to assemble. So you waited for Joker to show and explain himself. As seconds turned into minutes, your anticipation turned into disappointment. You really thought Joker would be brave enough to come out but once again, he failed you.

You sighed and turned to head back to your bedroom when you finally spotted Joker.

He stood by the balcony door with his hands in his pockets. He had washed his makeup off and stood before you bare and honest.

The candlelight bounced off his freckles and highlighted handsome face, scars and all. His lips were bitten raw and you swore his eyes were puffy but Joker wasn't a crier. There was no reason for him to do so yet to your amazement, he blinked back his tears before speaking.

"B-Bunny.. I uh.." Joker raked a hand through his sunkissed locs and sniffed his nose. It was endearing to see a man like Joker at a loss for words. And haunting to see him so emotional.

But despite all of that, he used your favorite nickname. Earlier he only used your real name; a clear indication that he was mad at you. Now Joker was back to calling you bunny and that small detail made you crack a smile.

"Hope you don't mind.. I uh dec-or-ated a bit. You see– I uh, trieD staying away. I really did. but I can't. I can't just go away. I need my Light.. and I know ya need me too so.. P-Please, don't make me go."

You stayed still as Joker came over to cup your face. His palms were shaking but warm against your dry, puffy face and Joker noticed.

He took in every detail and commemorated it to memory since he saw you last. The tip of your nose red and raw from crying, your quivering lower lip, to the way your eyes watered staring up into his.

"My pretty girl.. You're right. You're not her and I shouldn't treat ya like that. I won't treat you like that ever again but ya gotta give me another chance. I can be anything you need me to be but I... Please let me come back. I need ya, doll. I need my Light."

You gasped in shock when Joker fell to his knees at your feet. "J-Joker!"

He left a lingering kiss on your stomach poking through your top and looked up at you.

Joker gazed at you as if you hung the stars and the moon in the night sky. His eyes rivaled them with how they gleamed in the candlelight, begging for a chance at redemption. Another song played on in the background but the two of you paid it no mind. You were keen on Joker's lips parting to speak.

"I don't deserve ya but I'll spend every day proving that I do." You carded your fingers through his hair and watched Joker close his eyes. "Please, Bunny." He sighed.

He kissed your palms and trailed his kisses up your wrist until you had enough. With a high pitched whine, you yanked Joker up by his hair and captured his lips in a desperate fever.

Joker didn't complain about the pain but heeded your unspoken command. He stood to his full high and kissed all of your pain away. You tried to talk in between gasps for air but Joker silenced your attempts with his fervent passion.

"You hurt me." You moaned.

Joker nodded and pushed you backwards until the back of your legs hit the couch.

"I know. I'm sorry, Bunny." He pushed you down and took in your beauty amongst the candlelight and sea of red.

Joker dropped to his knees again and helped you spread your legs. "Lemme make it up to ya."