#fading scars

[aikaterini-drag]

Chapter 8 Caress

Kofi 🧡 AO3 🩷 ASK ME 🩵

Warnings (whole series): Violence, Non-Con Abduction, Explicit Sexual Content, Fluff, Enemies to Lovers, Sexual Tension, First Time, Emotional Sex, Protective Bucky, Angst with a Happy Ending, Soft Bucky Barnes, Bucky Barnes Recovering, Barnes Gets all the Love he deserves.

Find more chapters of the "Fading Scars" Series here ♡

Bucky grunted in his sleep, ragged breaths moving in and out of his lips at gasping intervals. Flashbacks clawed at his mind, tormenting him with chilling scenes of his past. He saw the things the Winter Soldier had done, a haunting playback of his own actions. He could hear the people he had killed, their screams, and he could see their poor eyes.

Every detail etched into his memory.

Blood.

Screams.

Innocence shattered.

Victims left in the wake of merciless brutality.

And then, amidst the turmoil, even Grace's face emerged.

In the delirium of his dreams, the Soldier was unable to stop the bloodthirst and the cursed programming that surged within him. His mechanical fingers formed a brutal vise around her delicate neck, a relentless pressure that suffocated her. She appeared so fragile in his grasp, trembling and tears streaming down her face, a haunting reflection of helplessness.

Stifled cries emerged from his lips, his mouth quivering with each gasp. He jolted awake, the shock so severe that it sent him lurching upright, his body falling off the couch where he had been sleeping. He landed on the floor with a thud, his chest heaving as if it were an overinflated balloon suddenly punctured by a needle. He was sweating with fear, his hands cold and clammy.

With trembling hands, he rubbed away the remnants of tears that clung to his eyes, his gaze darting toward the nearby clock. Nearly 6 a.m. ticked the hands, a merciless reminder that his mind refused to grant him even an hour of peaceful sleep. Sighing, he dragged his feet into a sitting position and right at that moment, a soft gentle voice caught his attention.

"James?"

Then he saw her. His stare wasn't supposed to be so focused on her, but there was a magnetic pull, an undeniable sense of safety that drew him to her. She was so alluring, bathed in the pale light of dawn, her loose waves cascading around her face. She was holding a glass of water in her palm and she was a sight for sore eyes.

"Are you alright?" She stepped closer, drawing nearer with a gentleness, closer still, until she was within arm's reach. His cries had pierced the silence and she couldn't help but worry.

"I woke you up... I'm sorry," he said softly and bent his head so she couldn't see his pathetic state.

"No, you didn't. I couldn't sleep." She could tell that he was still hazy and all she wanted to do was reach out and hug him. "Breathe. It's over."

A knot of gratitude formed in his chest. "I..."

"Here, have some water," she said, offering him the glass of water.

"Thank you," he said after he downed its contents in a few gulps. He rubbed his temples as if trying to dispel the previous horrid images from his mind.

"I'll stay with you," she said, her voice a whisper that held unwavering support. "Until you find your way back to sleep."

"I'm not going back to sleep," he said. "But you should go back. Don't worry. I'm fine."

"That's okay. I'll keep you company."

He tried to summon a reassuring smile, despite the fatigue that clung to him. "You should go back. I'll be fine."

"You're still pale."

"Why do you care about me?" he replied, his sudden question catching her unprepared.

Her response was tender, honest. "I don't know. It just feels right."

"You're already aware of this, Grace, but I think it's important to remind you. I've done terrible things. Horrible things. I am a horrible person. And that is an understatement."

"You're not talking about yourself right now. You're talking about the Winter Soldier. And that's not who you are."

His doubt lingered, self-damnation threatening to engulf him. "No. I am one of the worst men you'll encounter. I've manipulated and killed people in cold blood."

"You were being controlled. You were a victim and everything was committed against your will."

"My hands..." He clenched his fists and said, "My hands did all those things."

She gave him a compassionate smile. "But those hands also helped me and comforted me. They saved my life."

He stood speechless at that and she continued. 

"You're constantly at war with yourself when you clearly want to change."

"Change into what?"

"Into yourself. You're Sergeant Barnes, and that's the person you should embrace and accept." She sent him a tender look and that made his heart clench.

"I don't deserve this."

"Alright then, no more talking about stuff that will make you feel worse. We need to loosen up."

A wry chuckle escaped him. "What exactly can we do at 6 am? Dance?"

Her eyes sparkled. "That's a fantastic idea! Dancing can banish those haunting dreams from our minds."

He laughed. "You can't be serious."

"I'm very serious."

"I haven't danced since... well, since 1943!"

"Then we should remedy that immediately," she said, rising gracefully from her seat. "Come on, let's dance those worries away."

He blinked, not moving at all. "What— no! I don't even remember— and there's no music!"

"Stop complaining," she countered and motioned him to join her. "I can sing. I'll pick a song that you'll definitely like. Stop being so grumpy and let's dance, Sergeant Barnes."

Hearing her call him by his rank, melted his heart. Oh... she had done it. Unable to deny her request, he stood and closed the distance between them. Since he was too shy to touch her, she reached for his metal arm and looped it around her waist. The other interlocked with hers and rested over his chest. With a trembling breath, he drew her close, their bodies pressing together.

"Close your eyes and erase every single thought. Right now, you're Sergeant Barnes enjoying a dance. Just that," she whispered, her warm brown eyes taken in by his intense blue ones.

"I'm Sergeant Barnes."

She leaned her head against his chest. "Now, let the music take over."

With a soft hum, she began to sing.

Kiss me once Then, kiss me twice Then, kiss me once again It's been a long, long time Haven't felt like this, my dear Since can't remember when It's been a long, long time You'll never know How many dreams I dream about you Or just how empty they all seem without you So, kiss me once Then, kiss me twice Kiss me once again It's been a long, long time...

"This song..." he muttered, affected beyond imagination. The tune carried him back to a bygone era, a time when he was a soldier heading into the fray. Her voice, tender and melodious, seemed to caress his tormented soul, stitching together his raw edges and soothing his aching wounds.

"I know a few vintage songs," she shared as they swayed in each other's arms.

He chuckled. "Vintage songs for a vintage man."

"I had this notion that Sergeant Barnes would be quite the charmer with the ladies. You're ruining my fantasies."

A small smile came over his face. "I'm terribly sorry. As it appears, I've misplaced my charm."

He grinned remained as he made a graceful turn, their bodies moving in perfect sync. He was lulled by their dance, their connection. He wasn't sure if he wanted to kiss her senseless or keep dancing with her forever.

"Dancing is nice indeed," he whispered, his voice deep and husky.

"See? You're already feeling better," she said, her head tilting to meet his gaze. "I'm feeling rather relaxed myself."

His eyes crinkled at the sight of her unstoppable smile. His heart felt warm all of a sudden, a gentle fluttering sensation coiling in the pit of his stomach. No other woman had dragged these sorts of emotions from him. No one. Her soft features seemed to beckon him, a silent invitation he felt compelled to answer.

For the first time in his life, he listened to his premonition and... kissed her.

Grace yielded to the kiss and arched against him, the sensation of his lips against hers sending tingles racing down her spine. Her eyes fluttered shut, while his remained half-open. His lips were velvety soft, warm and tantalizingly moist. With every gentle press of his mouth against hers, her heart surged, blood coursing through her veins at an electrifying pace.

"James?" she breathed in his mouth and playfully brushed her nose against his.

"What did I just do?" Shocked at what he had done, he reeled back. His eyes raked over her and it was a dire mistake; she was flushed, her lips still glistening from their shared kiss.

She smiled. "You gave me a kiss. A rather hurried one though..."

"Hurried?"

"Hmm.... but I understand. You haven't had much practice."

"I-I... I'm sorry..." he said and heard his own voice shake. What the hell?! This had never happened in the past. He never stuttered and he certainly did not feel that hot and bothered.

"Don't be. I liked it. A lot. Although, it did end rather abruptly..."

"In that case..." He cleared his throat, his eyes piercing through her.  "I-I would be more than willing to give it another try."

"Please do so."

And with her encouragement, he leaned in once more, a soft sigh escaping him as he reclaimed her lips. His arms wrapped securely around her waist, and she reciprocated by tangling her fingers in his hair, deepening the kiss and savoring the sensations. They shared the same breaths, their bodies molding incredibly close.

Cupping his unshaven cheeks, she tilted her head to one side so she could fully savor the sultry kiss. Their moans echoed in the room that encased them, eventually leading them to collapse onto the nearby sofa. Her body pressed him into the cushions as he settled atop him, her legs straddling his thighs. Never straying from his mouth, she tightened her arms around his neck and squealed in delight when she felt the hardness of his arousal, firm and throbbing, vibrating against her core.

Their touches burned and he groaned, unable to take the need throbbing in his pants. They broke apart, their chests rising and falling with rapid breaths. His hand, warm against her skin, tenderly cupped her face, his thumb grazing her cheek. His eyes traced her kiss-swollen mouth, the evidence of their shared intimacy, and he couldn't help but admire the blush that adorned her cheeks.

"How's that for a kiss?" he drawled, a thumb rubbing circles into her cheeks.

"I will never underestimate you again, Sergeant Barnes," she said, giving him a lopsided smile.

They remained locked in a tight embrace, their bodies molded together as if they were always meant to fit perfectly. As the minutes stretched on, their eyes began to feel heavy, soothing fatigue tugging at their senses. They slept in the warmth of each other, no nightmares daring to intrude upon their precious moment.

▪️▪️▪️

Bucky's eyes fluttered open, and met with the delightful sensation of a soft, warm body pressing him down. Their positions had shifted during their slumber, and now he lay stretched out on the couch, while she rested comfortably on top of him. Her head found solace in the crook of his shoulder, and her right hand rested over his heart. She was breathing rhythmically, her half-open lips almost touching his neck.

A jolt of both surprise and arousal coursed through him, sensations he had programmed to forget resurfacing. The kiss they had shared played vividly in his mind, so tantalizing and exhilarating. Somehow, miraculously, he had slept soundly beside her, without interruptions and horrible dreams. And as it appeared she was equally cosy, no bad memories hunting her.

He willed himself to remain still, to enjoy the intimate connection between them. But the guy hiding beneath his pants chose to say hi, rising to full mast. He had never sported such a raging erection, never before so affected. His heart beat erratically as his thoughts ran toward forbidden territory. A mini freak-out consumed him and no matter how much he tried to control it, it became worse.

Decades of suppression and isolation had left him unfamiliar with the demands of the female body.  He hadn't touched himself or craved a woman for so long, and with her tempting him, his body was practically going into shock. Suppressing a groan, he attempted to gently flip her over, but she woke up and snuggled even closer. Her eyes fluttered open for a brief moment before drifting shut once more.

"Uhm... Grace?" He suppressed a moan, his hands gently anchoring her hips to still her restless movements. "Moving like that isn't exactly helping."

"Oh..." Was the most eloquent word she could muster, too hazy from sleep and the undeniable pressure that pulsed between her legs. Before matters could escalate further, he tenderly lifted her and settled her beside him on the couch. She sighed when she lost the feel of his body and sat against an arrangement of cushions.

"Did you sleep well?" she asked shyly.

"Yes..." He shifted, crossing a leg over his knee. "I've never slept so peacefully in my whole life."

"Me too."

"Do you regret this? The kiss, I mean," he said, the tremor in his words betraying his uncertainty.

"Regret? Never." He leaned in, their foreheads almost touching. "I'd kiss you again. Would you?"

He brushed their mouths together in a featherlight kiss. "Does that answer your question?"

"Hmm... I am very pleased with you, Sergeant."

"You keep calling me that and I can't have enough."

"I'm glad you like it," she said, latching onto the hem of his shirt, her touch a gentle affirmation of their newfound closeness.

"You shouted my name back at the compound, remember? You helped me, Grace. You have no idea how much."

"And I hope I can keep helping you if you'll let me."

"You're so willing to risk your life," he said, a shadow of melancholy gathering in his eyes.

"For both of us and for the greater good. We've both been victims, but we can save the future."

"You are right..."

"Now," she said and cupped his shoulders, "where were we?"

James suppressed a growl when her fingers threaded through his hair, tenderly caressing the nape of his neck. Their world seemed to tilt, ever so slightly, as he mouthed at her lips, softly grazing his facial hair against her smooth skin. His tongue licked over her bottom lip, tasting her again, getting his head filled with her taste.

"I suggest we sleep together from now on," she sighed, moving her lips against his. "It's for the best."

"You are an incurable tease," he whispered on her skin, one calloused finger rubbing at her chin.

"Perhaps I am. But you seem to enjoy it, Sergeant."

[christxphvrtaylxr]

i turned another unused feature verse of mine into a song. it's called ‘FADING SCARS’ and you can listen to it on #SoundCloud now :) https://on.soundcloud.com/f68TQ 

[letiz12]

tw SH

i wanna relapse, I NEED TO RELAPSE

my scars are fading, i can't

they're fading, but the pain is still there, i'm still in pain, so why are they fking fading? WHY ARE THEM HEALED IF I'M NOT? i can't

[howlsnteeth]

make it real 'cause anything's better than the way i feel right now

[levitanias]

most recent scar/grian hermitcraft uploads am i right

[rosaacicularis]

contrary to what the other players would say, scar and grian never actually held hands when they were in that desert. it was always a hand on a wrist, checking to make sure the pulse was still there. somehow, it meant more than interlocked fingers. somehow, it got them through it.

[ptanalo]

yearning I think

[maelys-with-the-torn-cieling]

Reminder that Pokémon, being animals, don't wear clothes unless explicitly specified !

Meaning, in the case of Gardevoir's "dress", it's not actually cotton, tissue or silk !

Those are skin flaps.

[starry-bi-sky]

random facts for my Dead On Main childhood friends au:

Danny's ghost form changed when he was with Jason in the ghost zone, and then reverted back to how it was after he died when Jason disappeared.

Danny as a human has blue-green eyes. As in, his eyes are blue with the lower half being green, and they bleed into one another at the middle. This is entirely because of Danny being a halfa, its meant to represent how he's no longer completely human.

In contrast, Jason's eyes are teal with hints of green. This is because he was revived. One half crawled out of the grave, and the other never left.

If you stare at Danny's eyes for too long, it sometimes looks like the green and blue are swirling together but never mixing, like water and oil. People agree that its very beautiful, but very unsettling.

Danny's lichtenberg figures as a ghost are black, and when he cries his tears float and disappear when they fall off his face. The tears have a thick, almost gel-like substance to them if you touch it.

Danny's ghost form is pretty unsettling - he fully embraced the fact that he died and in turn strongly shows it through his ghost form, plus the additional effect his grief has on his form. He's not who you would think of when you're told "we have a ghost hero protecting the city". he looks like someone the hero would fight. Danny usually keeps his goggles on over his face for this reason.

The black space on his suit, naturally, has stars on them. they shift and move as he does, and sometimes there are nebulae that swirl into view.

His lair in the ghost zone is an observatory, but like one of those fantasy looking ones that you'd see in some kind of solarpunk ghibli movie. it's huge on the inside, with a long hallway with polaroids strung along the walls, and doors leading into different rooms. The main room is the 'observe floor' with a large domed ceiling and furniture littered around near the walls, and more polaroids. Danny can press a button on the side wall to 'open' the dome ceiling and reveal a night sky above his head that he can float up into. some of these stars are danny's memories that play when you touch them. danny can move the night sky around like an interactive screen, and find new stars. This observatory has a hammock.

Danny's got his 'Kill The Clown' corkboard in his lair as well, it mirrors out into his apartment.

Oh. The hole in his heart. You can stick your hand into it. Or try to. Danny's gonna shove you back immediately though, because it feels weird. And also it's gonna leave a Substance on your hand that's gonna be really hard to take off, stains afterward, and has the consistency of semi-thick ink and oil. His tears are made of the same stuff.

Danny's Ghost Forms below (without his mad scientist goggles bc i forgot to add. them) Left is after he reunites with Jason (both times), and the Right is pre-reunion (both times).

[vulcan-moon]

dont talk much abt this but this is a milestone worth celebrating! longest ive ever been sh free for since i started struggling w it as a teen. here's to another year ig!!

[itsthislake]

“Near the End of April”

HAPPY BIRTHDAY LUFFY!!

Poem by William Stanley Braithwaite (1878 – 1962)

Support me via Ko-fi?

(click to see details! zoom in on the strawhats!)

[couldtheycatchkira]

i think the question that this blog asks often has a totally different answer depending on whether you choose to interpret it as either:

- if [character] was a detective in the death note universe, would they catch kira?

OR

- if kira was a villain (of the week, even) in [character]'s universe, would they catch him?

for example, if the icarly crew, behaving as they do on their own show, were transposed to the DN universe and tasked with finding kira, they'd probably fail. but if light yagami was dropped into the icarly universe they'd get him for sure. after like a few episodes where he's a recurring villain in a pathetic way. because that's the logic of the icarly universe.

(if you couldn't tell I've been thinking about the icarly gang catching kira since i saw the poll lmao)

((This is also a good take. Sometimes, you think to yourself - if the Death Note were somehow some sort of remotely-induced alchemical attack, would Scar be able to figure it out? Would Light, the adoptive son of Grumman (and therefore adoptive uncle of Riza Hawkeye), ever come to know who Scar was until it was too late? Or would his "in" with the Amestran military to come into multiple pieces of confidential information?

And sometimes, you think to yourself - if Scar was put into the Death Note universe he is going to be so busy turning other people into ragù that Kira is just not on his radar - until his older brother, notable medical malpractitioner, is almost killed in a freak accident. Then, Kira is now on Scar's hit list. Is Light able to find out that a deep-web hitman is after him, one who is methodically tracking down everyone who knows Light? (Also, the brother wasn't actually a target, word just spreads and Scar jumped to conclusions, like he always does.)

Much to think about!))

[androgynouspenguinexpert]

congruent of d'deridahn

[pinkcadavart]

Creature

[bogdanovics]

[guard-en]

wondered what it would be like Jackie manages to get up there in years, works hard enough, manages to get to a point where she can retire.