#fixing insane choices from the past

[balkanradfem]

Fixing pants with overly-tight waistband

So, I accidentally found some warm winter pants in a box under my bed! I was extremely happy to find them because I've been out in freezing temperatures in jeans, my legs getting red and irritated from the cold. However, these pants I found, there's something interesting about them; they've got their waistband completely cut off.

I have no memory of cutting that off, but I'm 100% sure it was me, because I know what my line of thinking was. The waistband was too tight, and the pants were high-waisted, so I thought, hey, I just need to cut off this tight part and then the pants will be wearable. And then, after I cut if off, I found out, that no, you can't just cut off the piece of pants that keeps them on your body. They slide off. So after that bold move I just abandoned them in a box. I had no confidence that I could fix them, but this has changed! I am not any better at sewing than I was back then, but my confidence is through the roof, I believe I can not only fix this but make them the most comfortable pair of pants I own.

I rummaged around to find some materials I could use for a new waistband, and I was purposefully picking materials that are very stretchy, soft and warm. I want a soft stretchy waistband! I ended up being specifically drawn to these 2 black sleeves; they're from a sweater, super warm and stretchy, and also durable. I also found an elastic that I ripped out of some sweatpants in the past because it was too tight.

I decided to make the elastic longer by adding a piece of cotton fabric in the middle, and I sewed that together, I feel like it doesn't matter if there's some normal cloth in there. It won't be visible anyway.Now, to make those sleeves into a waistband. I figured out I could do it without cutting them into pieces of fabric; they're already sewn into tubes. So instead I cut them to be the same length as my elastic, and sewed them together into one long tube (I made a mistake at first and flipped one sleeve on the wrong side. But I redid it and now they're good).

Now my long tube can hold the elastic in it! But then I decided, wait, I would prefer if I just folded those tubes into a new, doubly thicker tube, because I really want as many warm layers as possible on my hips (don't wanna get cold). So the tube is folded, and elastic is placed in.

So now I needed to sew these sleeves into a new tube, with the elastic inside, and I figured, hey, I could just sew them onto the pants at the same time, so I don't have to sew that part multiple times.

I lined up the tube with the pants, and you can see I very haphazardly just sewed them on with a normal running stitch; I was mostly doing that to try it out, and see how it would look like all put together. I then sewed the elastic together in a circle, and closed the tubes together as well. The waistband at this point was shorter in length than the cut off hem of the pants, so I was lightly scrunching the pants while sewing, to match the length, knowing once I put them on this will not be visible and even out. Then I tried them on, and while it looked okay, my running stitch came apart, and the waistband separated!

You can see here how half of the waistband is off. I was so focused on scrunching the pants I forgot to make the stitch adjusted to the stretchy fabric.

I know sewing machines have a special stitch that is used on stretchy fabric so the stitch itself is stretchy, but I never found out how to do something like that by hand, and I was at that point, in a room with no internet so I wasn't gonna find out. Instead, I invented my own little stitch that would do a good-enough job. In the second picture you can see how every few stitches, there's thread just going around the edge, that was my trick. This way, when I'm stretching the waistband, instead of the thread breaking, it will pull from these areas where I've wrapped it around, because it's a bit more loose in there and can be tightened without breaking. I've also sewn it in 4 sections, so its not one continuous thread going through the same waistband.

Once I did that, I was mostly done! Here's the pants mended and how they look on me.

I've converted them into sweatpant-like garment, which, yes, good. But! I was wrong about one thing. That elastic, even though I added some length on it, was still too tight, making me feel uncomfortable and tight. So. I opened up the waistband again. Pulled the elastic out. Stitched it back, and tried it on. And decided to keep it like that. This fix didn't need an elastic, I was just paranoid that my new waistband wouldn't hold without one – but it was stretchy and firm enough to hold without any issues! They look just the same as with the elastic in them. I've since worn them outside and they're great!

This entire fix maybe took an hour and now I have comfortable pants to wear all winter. 10/10 recommend trying it out.

Also this is not an official way how to fix a waistband, I've done it before by just adding extra fabric to the waistband that was already there, and it's a lot less work, however... this works too. If you've.. chaotically cut the whole waistband off. Completely salvageable.

[euelios]

there are very specific people in my irl life who can say the most innocuous things on earth and still make me steaming mad

[schrodingerscougar]

Note: the 2nd part for this. fem!reader. cheating. i didn’t think you would like it so much, but since you did, here’s part two.

•••

Maybe if he watched you close enough, if he kept an eye on you while he was near, Simon would get the answers he was looking for. All he wanted was a glimpse into your mind, a glint in your eyes that would give away why you’d spent those nights by his side without saying anything about it.

The mission was slowly coming to an end, and he had overheard you and Johnny talk about your plans for your time home. The Scotsman offered to go on a short trip with you to Rome, visiting the city you’d read so much about in the past year or so. Going there was a promise you made to yourself on New Year’s Day and he was more than happy to help make it happen.

“Have you introduced her to your family?” Simon asked Johnny one evening when they went out for a drink.

The younger man gave him a confused look, but once the lieutenant motioned towards the corner of the bar where you were deep in a conversation with Laswell, his lips formed a flat line and he nodded a few times. “Yeah, well, I mentioned her once to my sister, and the next thing I know, my mother’s blowing up my phone. I’d rather keep her away from this insanity,” he explained.

“Wise choice.”

He hated this. He hated to know that Johnny was dating you, he hated to keep up this nice conversation with him, all while he was struggling to find out why you cared about him back then. His mind was full of stupid ideas again, that maybe you weren’t that deeply in love with the fellow sergeant. What if he was just your backup plan? What if the one you truly wanted was him?

Fucking hell. He was truly losing his grip.

“I’m going back to the base.”

Simon looked to the side, only to find you standing there with this adorable warm smile on your perfect, kissable lips. Out of the corner of his eye he noticed Johnny taking your hand, his fingers lacing with yours before he raised it to his mouth to place a soft kiss on it.

He definitely didn’t have the right to be upset about it. Yet, he felt a pang of jealousy, and he was maybe even offended by the way Johnny’s blue eyes shined when he looked at you. His mind was telling him it should be him, even though he knew it was against the regulations.

“Let me finish my drink and I’ll walk you back,” Johnny said, but you just shook your head and told him he should take his time, have fun, and maybe he should talk to the others too. “You think I’m ignoring them? Well, I do spend a lot of time in the Lt’s company, that’s true,” he mused.

After he took a glance at the empty glass next to him, Simon had an idea. “I’m done for today anyway, I can go with her if you don’t want her to go alone,” he offered.

While Johnny seemed happy that he was kind enough to go with you, you looked hesitant. Unsure. Damn, if he didn’t know any better he would’ve said you looked scared for a moment. But why would you be scared? He didn’t do anything that could scare you.

In the end you agreed, so the two of you were soon out on the street, walking side by side. The need to reach out and take your hand poisoned Simon’s mind, and he decided to stuff his hands into the pockets of his jacket instead. He glanced over at you every so often, enjoying the view that he wouldn’t see for a few weeks at least.

“Why did you stay by my side in the infirmary while I was recovering?” he suddenly asked, his eyes fixed on you to see your facial expression.

And sure enough, at first you looked shocked. “What do you mean?” you inquired innocently.

With a sigh, Simon came to a halt and grabbed your wrist to make you stop as well. “I saw you there. And the doctor confirmed that you spent every night there with me while I was knocked out.”

“Look, it’s—”

“Why? I need to know,” he pressed on.

You buried your fingers into your hair as you spinned on your heels to turn away from him. “I don’t know, I just didn’t want you to be alone,” you admitted.

Once he took a deep breath, he was quick to blow it out. “So you stayed out of pity?”

“No! I mean… God, Ghost, I don’t know, okay? It just didn’t feel right to let you lie there on your own, I didn’t want you to wake up alone, and—”

He shouldn’t have done it, but it felt so good. Because Simon launched forward, his big palm placed on the back of your neck as his lips crashed into yours. At first you were frozen from surprise, but then you returned his kiss, lips moving against each other in perfect sync. He had been waiting for this for so long that he couldn’t even believe it was happening.

He was only pulled back to reality by your voice after you pulled away and took a few steps away from him. “What the hell are you doing?” you asked. “Fuck, what the hell am I doing?”

“It’s okay, we can always pretend it never happened,” he said with an aching heart.

“You don’t get it, do you?” When Simon shrugged and shook his head, you walked back to him and poked his chest with your index finger. “I’m with Johnny, this is totally against the rules, and no matter how badly I always wanted to know what it would be like to kiss you, this can’t happen again. But I know it happened and it’s going to torture me now.”

With a gulp, Simon nodded. “I’m sorry. I don’t know what got into me,” he said with a sigh.

To his surprise, you put a hand on his now masked cheek, a move so gentle that he was beginning to get very confused. And when you pulled down his mask, things got even more confusing, because you stood on your toes and kissed him again. This time you let yourself go, your fingers grabbing a fistful of his hair as you moaned against his lips.

“We should get going,” you said once you let him go and pulled his mask back to its place.

“I don’t understand what’s going on.”

Instead of answering, you flashed a smile at him, making his life a living hell by playing an innocent angel. But then you curled your finger to make him come a little closer. “Neither do I. But we will have to figure it out.”

(part 3)

[eroticsturn]

permission - c.s

Summary: Chris touches himself without your permission. 

Warnings: sub!chris x dom!fem reader, smut, use of mommy, overstimulation, praise kink/ degradation kink, and idk what else

𝘯𝘰𝘵 𝘱𝘳𝘰𝘰𝘧𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘥!

the triplets have been on tour for the past two months. which made things harder for chris as you weren’t able to go with them due to school assignments. today you were going to surprise chris since they just came back from tour. 

you changed into some short shorts and tank top because you knew that would drive chris insane. it’s already late so you don’t necessarily need to dress up all nice and fancy for him. you call an uber and make your way to the triplets house. 

you’re immediately greeted by matt at the door

"hey y/n, he's in his room. he's been all moody since we left for tour. hopefully you can help fix that" matt muttered out softly which could barely be heard.

"thanks for letting me know" you smiled and made your way down the stairs to his room.

when you heard muffled sounds coming from his room. you just assumed he was playing on his pc until you got closer to his door and saw that it was cracked open a bit.

he whined as his hand softly swiped over his leaking red tip. you watched as his face scrunched every time his hand went over his sensitive area. he let out a few whimpers and whines.

you started to feel the space between your legs soak with anticipation as your core practically throbbed for some sort of relief. you open the door and once he heard the door creak, he immediately attempted to cover himself with his blanket and snapped his head up towards the door.

"what are you up to, baby?" you say innocently.

you slowly made your way over to him. he still hadn't said a word.

"what is it sweetheart? what were you doing just now?" you taunted as he tried to avoid eye contact with you. chris remained silent.

his chest moving slowly while he tried controlling his breathing. his glossy blue eyes stared everywhere but your direction. you can see how he’s in the verge of tears, still avoiding to look up at you.

your hand gripped his chin harshly. turning his precious face towards your direction, making him have no choice but to finally stare up at you. his pretty blue eyes got even watery, tears sliding down his cheeks while you grinned sinisterly.

“answer my question, baby. what were you just doing?” you say quietly, hearing his muffled whimpers.

“m-mommy, i’m sorry..” chris finally says, his voice shaky as he held his tears in.

“sorry for what, baby?” you say, staring into his glossy eyes, using your thumb to wipe the tears slipping down.

chris remained silent once again, his chest moving rapidly now as he struggles to breathe properly. you leaned into his ear, your warm breath making his body shiver.

“didn’t we agreed that we wouldn’t touch ourselves without permission, christopher?” you whispered into his ear, causing him to whimper once again.

after a few seconds of silence, chris begins to open is mouth, letting a quiet whimper before speaking.

“i-i’m sorry mommy.. i needed to be touched..” he says quietly, tears sliding down his cheeks once again.

“you don’t touch yourself, baby. you need to ask for permission before you do that. now you have your dick hidden under this blanket.” you say harsh tone.

your hand grips onto the blanket tightly, ripping it off him. he whines quietly, feeling the blanket rub against his angry tip.

“mmm.. mommy please touch me..” he cries out.

feeling the cold breeze from his room hitting his nude area, causing him to grow goosebumps around his body.

“and why should i do that? you disobeyed me, christopher.” a smirk formed onto your lips once finishing your sentence.

your right hand sliding up his thigh as your thumb rubbed onto his inner thigh. his mouth opened up slightly, arching his back in hopes your arm touches his sensitive area on accident. you noticed his movements, leaning your thumb towards his tip. you begin to rub the pre cum around it causing him to grip the sheets tightly.

“f-fuck..” he groans quietly

his back curves upwards more, tempting to feel more then just your thumb.

“mommy please. it hurts..” he cried out

the more you rubbed the tip, the more angrier it got. his body began to shake and his hand began to move down to his thigh.

“t-touch me or.. or-“ he stumbled to say but you immediately cut him off.

“or what? you’re gonna touch yourself again without permission? making this even harder for you?” you spit out harshly.

your hand wraps around his hard bulge, jacking him off in a intense pace. his body joint up and his mouth opens up wide.

“m-mommy! wait a s-second-“ he moans out loudly before you cut him off again.

“isn’t this what you wanted, baby? you wanted me to touch you so thats what i’m doing.” you say sweetly

his right hand grips the sheets tightly as his left hand squeezes your free hand.

the room filled with his echoing moans and soft whimpers. his mouth was open wide, saliva sliding down on the right side of his lips. your movements continue to increase. your right hand sliding up and down his dick in a intense pace while your left hand stayed unmoved on his right thigh.

his hand clinched onto your wrist tighter than before.

“i- i can’t.. i’m so close..” he struggles to say.

his chest moving up and down in quick speed and tears sliding down his rosy cheeks.

a smirk formed onto your lips as you heard him say those words. without any hesitation, you slipped your hand away. he whimpers loudly, his dick throbbing and the tip getting than before.

chris looks up at you in desperation

“mommy please.. don’t do this. i need to cum, please! it hurts.” he cries out, fully sobbing from the way you made his body more overwhelmed and shaky.

you stood up fully, smirking down at him while he continued to sob

“i would say that’s punishment for you touching yourself but.. mommy needs you just as much you need her right now.” you say sweetly. hands making their way to your shorts.

chris continues to cry but making sure he was silent. he stared at your hand movements, watching how those pretty soft hands of yours grab the rim of your shorts as you pull them down exposing your baby blue panties.

his mouth opened wide, groaning loudly at the sight of you stripping yourself in front of him. just the thought of you jumping on him, shoving his dick inside your wet clit made him want to cum at the spot.

staring down at him with a huge smirk, your hands grabbed onto the ending of your tank top. you slowly pulled it up, exposing your matching baby blue bra that fit so nicely against your tits.

“fuck.. mommy quit teasing..” chris says in desperation

his sensitive spot harden all over again just by the sight of you and the images planted on his head.

“be patient, baby.” you say innocently

your hands made their behind you, unclipping your bra as you let it fall on its own. chris groaned loudly at the sight of your boobs being fully exposed now. his thoughts got wilder and wilder. now picturing you bouncing on him, your pretty breasts jumping along with you.

“f-fuck..” he groans out even louder. his head leaning back onto his bed frame. letting his whole mind go wide.

you smiled at him so sweet and innocent, pushing down your panties which were soaked from the very moment you walked into his room. you teasingly made your way towards him, and he began to whimper again.

you sat on his lap straddling him and slowly grind yourself on him, just to tease him a little more. the throbbing feeling became worse, you grew needier and needed him inside of you immediately. you lifted yourself up, and grabbed his dick. you slowly pushed yourself down on him and you both let out a groan.

ima start writing pt.2 soon. i just needed to publish something rn 😭

- 𝘈

[maxphilippa]

A lot of the neg claims about II are really just making a problem really big/treating it as , or taking things out of context, so let's talk about some of them, ESPECIALLY because of a certain someone(s) lately. Let me clarify that I know that II's writing ISN'T perfect, but nothing is perfect really, and most of these issues are misinterpretation, the choices of the fandom and/or even AE TRYING to fix the writing of a character because a certain SOMEONE was fired on early stages of the writing of said character.

So.

Let's talk about Inanimate Insanity Invitational, and the usual claims that come with it.

1. Cabby's Writing, Interpretations of Her Relationships, and ableism.

Cabby is one of the most... "controversial" characters when it comes to talk about III's writing, which it really shouldn't be like that at all, although I get where people are coming from expressing their concerns when it comes to the writing of her. Let me clarify something. Yes, I am aware that Cabby's writing changes A LOT and that it isn't perfect by any means, but I think that what people fail to understand most of the time is that Taylor was the one that started the Cabby-Test Tube storyline as a whole, and at some point as early s3 was being made, Taylor was fired from the team due to. Well, you guys know it. Pretty bad stuff. So of course, they had to figure out what direction they could go with Cabby as a whole, and to giving her character more depth than her just using her files for the game.

Now, it is obvious that they didn't plan from the start to have Cabby as a disabled character, but again, writing isn't always perfect. They had to somehow make things work. And even IF it wasn't planned, you guys have to remember the other factors that came with the writing on general. So of course her writing isn't as consistent as the writing of the other character on s3, but on later episodes it does get more better. I can see why people don't really like her arc, but those factors really matter when criticizing a form of media.

Cabby's writting and her disability isn't bad. Yes, it could've had better ways of execution, but it's not bad.

When it comes to relationships, I have seen someone seeing Cabby's relationship with Test Tube as a canonically sapphic thing because apparently Cabby's VA had that sort of intent, and therefore even claiming that Cabby suffers from lesbophobia(via claiming that she had a crush on Test Tube) and misogyny.

And that's not true. First of all, Cabby's and Test Tube's relationship is pretty much an example of friendships that don't work, and Test Tube pretty much exposed Cabby to the world and made her feel bad about herself for the rest of the episodes. A headcanon doesn't mean that the whole thing changes on canon, it's just that, a headcanon/interpretation, and claiming that what they did to her was lesbophobic is. Pretty weird. Since it is shown that Test Tube hurted Cabby a lot. As well, just because the Voice Actor had an intention, IT DOESN'T mean that the writers had said intention.

When it comes to the claims of misogyny, I still don't quite get why people try to see what isn't there.

The thing is that there isn't a lot of femenine characters on II and such, but Cabby isn't treated like that because "she doesn't do anything for men", she helps everyone on general, she cares about people. But she isn't put as a bad woman because of this. What you guys tend to forget is that. Cabby WAS kind of a prick on early s3. She DID commit mistakes and wasn't a great person, but that doesn't mean that misogyny is there just because for that. Just because people treat a fem character badly/not great BECAUSE OF HER PAST ACTIONS, doesn't mean that there's misogyny. The cast on general didn't like Cabby at all until she "redeemed" herself/changed/was true to herself. So that claim is. Pretty out of nowhere.

Now... with the ableism. I do get where you guys are coming from, but if you look into it deeply, they genuinely did have other intentions. The thing that people usually tend to forget is that the II characters aren't all white and black, they're gray. They do messed up stuff when they don't understand things. What the characters do to Cabby before she becomes more open about her disability is NEVER glorified and they always end up learning about it one way or another. Is it reasonable? Yes, was it ever justified on canon terms? Nope! People can be assholes without knowing that they're assholes and THEN learn! Things like that happen all of the time. Writers don't condone the actions of the characters.

Let's take an example at the scene with Bot and Cabby on episode 14. The main problem here was Bot giving fake information to Cabby, which yes, I agree that was a very bad move to do and you should NEVER do that to a disabled person (especially taking in count that Cabby suffers from a sort of memory disorder), but they didn't have an malicious intent whole doing so at all. Bot was still figuring out themselves and didn't want to be written down by somebody (because. THAT'S WHAT TEST TUBE AND FAN DID.), and Cabby doing the file thing was also easy to take on a bad light, but after Justin's explanation, it makes sense.

Could've it been treated on a better way? Yes. And YET, Bot apologizes for what they did to Cabby and DOES the disability aid themselves for her, and apologizes on EPISODE 15, just a few hours later probably or some days later. And on the same episode, Lifering tells Cabby that she shouldn't be ashamed of using her aids and that she shouldn't feel bad about those. Test Tube RESPECTS Cabby's space once she gets that she was wrong about her too. She knows she messed up too badly.

Later on, on episodes 16 and 17, everyone finally gets Cabby's files and respects them, because they finally saw that she actually needs those and that hey, she changed a lot. They treated her good. Characters can be human and can make mistakes, but they can also get better and learn. Although Cabby's arc is not flawless, it is still good. And all of the issues are easily explained just like that.

2. Bot's creation, and how it's never justified by them.

One of the main points that some people tend to bring on "III's poor writing" is the fact that Bot was pretty much built based on a parasocial relationship of sorts. However said people dare to say that AE portrays it as something good/thought that it was okay, and never did anything else to show Bot being uncomfortable by it, but this is NOT TRUE.

Ever since Bot found out that they were a replica of someone, they knew it was pretty fucked up coming from Test Tube and Fan. Meanwhile it is not explained the loss these two went through (The Shimmer egg probably does not count, since traces of "Bowbot" have been seen on early-mid s2), we know for a fact that what happened was pretty bad for the two of them. But, Bot never really forgave Test Tube. "What about the chat they have where Test Tube apologizes to them?", Bot is willing to give her another chance for the fact that Test Tube offered to help them to be themselves.

Even then Bot explains on their interview that the main reason they acted poorly towards Cabby, was because they got attached to Test Tube, the "only" person that could've helped them to change at the moment. However, again, III doesn't justify what Test Tube and Fan did. Sure, Bot considers them their parents, but they just created them and even when Bot was discovering themselves, Test Tube was. Still pushing the fem terms on them.

So, Bot is fully aware about their existence being fucked up, but they're just trying to live their life as well. These claims do not make any sense despite it being the easiest part to look into.

3. Invitational's writing. (And how The Bright Lights not being themselves is part of the fandoms fault, but also what happens when you try to expand an character who's arc is over).

Ah... one of the most... complicated points here. People tend to absolutely want to kill AE over the writing feeling weird or unprofessional on S3, but I think that all of you just kind of forget many factors at hand that came with it.

The reason as to why the most of the main Bright Lights were there IS because of viewer voting. The Bright Lights had their arcs finished on s2, and trying to have an story where something is going on with characters that are pretty much done in their stories is VERY difficult, and should not even happen at all. The only characters that did have something going on were Nickel, Balloon and Yinyang on s2 terms. Even OJ was just not having it.

So of course the viewer voting getting those 3 Bright Lights there kind of made things so much more mid on a building up relationships term. Other characters had a lot going on that needed to be solved, not them. I do think that AE should NEVER let the viewers do anything anymore because that's one of the weakest points of s3: most of the s2 characters. When you try to develop characters who's arc is closed, you kinda pretty much go nowhere with it. But you can't just have them sitting doing nothing till their elimination.

However... it's not bad when you forget those 3 characters (Fan, Paintbrush and Test Tube) and have the remaining s2 guys and the new characters. It isn't bad at all. In fact, their arcs are pretty consistent for the most part (except for Cabby's if we count the start of it), and the arcs of Nickel & Balloon AND Yinyang show some real growth and ARE proof that AE does know how to write characters. As long as they ACTUALLY HAVE something going on for them.

As well, something that people forget a lot when it comes to III's writing, is that it is more lighthearted on comparison to S2. Which I can get to an extent, but then, let's remember this: AE made S3 because they were burnt out from S2's writing.

They wanted to make something more fun, something that was more S1 like, and meanwhile I do get people not liking S3 at all because of this, please do remember that S3 is meant to be more silly. More funny. Less serious stuff. Until the last episodes dropped that is, but it is still it's main intention.

4. ...Transphobic? Allegations/accusations.

This point makes me feel so SO tired at this point and it's how people say "AE gets the trans characters out just when they came out" and get so SO tired of people missing the point with Bot's design, but also missing the whole Paintbrush thing.

The reason as to why they get eliminated is because they get closure to their arc, and they have to get growth off-screen. On both of Paintbrush's eliminations, they were gone as a way to have closure, because the competition wasn't a healthy place for them, and Paintbrush's growth off screen is subtle, but it is still there. Back on s2 they were scared of saying their identity, but after they got eliminated, they got comfortable enough to the point of having the non binary flag on their shared room with Fan, and are pretty respected by the whole cast afterwards.

On s3, their elimination is pretty much the same, but it's them knowing that they don't have it on themselves to keep competing in the show. They get closure with Mephone4 instead.

When it comes to Bot, I have genuinely seen people complain about AE getting rid of the "fem traits" because Bot is... nonbinary. But. That's. That's fucking dumb at this point. The pink and the EYELASHES are FROM BOW. Bot's whole arc is about finding themselves and showing their true self to the world, and Justin has confirmed that Bot still DOES like those things, but that they're trying to find themselves! Trying to be their own person! And them getting out was also them getting closure because they finally know who they are, and they know that no matter what, no one can change that for them.

And for the last part of this... it is pretty obvious that s1 and early-mid s2 had quite some poor humor regarding Painty's gender, but this can be explained by two things: 1- They were still quite young when these seasons were made, 2- Taylor was still on the team (and he was the main reason as to why there were slurs on II, please do correct me if I'm wrong), but they ended up getting treated with respect and decency despite all things. Again. It wasn't perfect. But they managed to fix it and make it work.

Now, are those factors worth pointing out? Yes, they are, but are they arguments to try and say that AE is transphobic on actual times? No. They showed growth and tried to fix their mistakes. And meanwhile it isn't flawless, it's still pretty good.

5. Nickel's Writing Is Actually Good, You Guys Are Just Too Convinced In Your Own Headcanons

Oh boy, now, if you are quite familiar with the plots I usually analyze here, you must know already how strongly I feel about Nickel as a character and his arc with Balloon as a whole. Because everyone gets them so so wrong and misses the whole point of it. You may know this but people complain a lot about Nickel's arc taking "too long" or "being way too rushed", and both of those takes are pretty much wrong. Some also say that Nickel was worthy of a big villain just because, oh, what was his crime? Sucking at communication and trying to protect his alliance from someone he saw as dangerous at the time? That's called being a complicated character. That's literally it. Some even complain about him "not getting what he deserves" but he pretty much does get called out on the series, but also yelling at him and telling him to die won't help.

That's now how it works. Nickel's arc makes sense and it was long because he had to solve a lot about himself and about learning how to be a good, genuine friend. He became soft because he ended up having people (ex: Box) that told him to get his shit together and to stop putting his petty feelings first to focus on the team. Nickel's whole arc is about knowing what you did was wrong, and wanting to become a better person despite all odds. Even if those who you care about might never forgive you. It was necessary for The Grand Slams arc to make sense and to keep on growing.

You guys want a character to get better, but then complain when one character does become a better person, a more genuine version of themselves. And no, Nickel's actions were never justified by the show or by himself, although he did excuse his actions with fear at some point, but even then, he fully recognizes that his actions were terrible and understands if Balloon won't forgive him.

Just because you hate a character it doesn't mean you can just mischaracterize them and or forget the whole point of their arc. Nickel's arc alongside Balloon's MAKES sense and it's pretty much the best arc on s3 all factors considered.

6. Is Invitational a bad season overall?

It isn't a bad season. Yes, I keep repeating myself, it is not perfect, but that doesn't mean that it's a bad season. It doesn't stand up to the point where s2 is, but that's the goal, it's meant to be a season made for fun and to chill, and meanwhile I can agree that there are things that can be better or could've been executed on different ways, and it got way better on later episodes due to better structure.

I can get people not liking s3 because of it's flaws but it's not the WORST THING THAT EVER HAPPENED AND A MOCKERY, it's genuinely just something made for fun. And people tend to forget that.

There is not a media that is perfect. Inanimate Insanity isn't by any means.

But man. Isn't it a good show anyway? Isn't it a show that made you feel for the stories and it's characters? Isn't it imperfectly perfect on it's own way? Isn't it made with care and love? Isn't the fact that it has flaws makes it feel more genuine?

I personally think it is. But that's just me.

Thank you for reading.

[heliads]

Ink Stains

Moving from Amity to Dauntless was quite the lifestyle change. Still, nothing rocks your boat more than meeting Eric Coulter for the first time, especially when he seems to like you more than he should.

masterlist

Creativity does not flourish much in Dauntless, nor art for that matter. It is strange, then, that you, so fully borne of both, would choose this bloody faction as opposed to any other. Your birth faction, Amity, is better suited to your temperament and interests, but you had hardly realized that when you underwent the Choosing Ceremony. All of us must leave our homes when we grow up, and only very few can return.

Dauntless seemed like the furthest place you could run, so of course that was the one you chose. You missed it later, only after loathing it, blaming it for your troubles, and finally admitting that it might have been a good home to you, but only after far too long.

Sometimes, you think that’s why the city decided to force its inhabitants to choose their home faction when they’re so young. At that age, all you want to do is escape, so you pick something strange and foreign, a faction that your family would hate so you could fight back against them. When the dust clears and you realize that the past was not so terrible after all, you are in the middle of a strange place with no way of returning, so you have no choice but to fight to stay there.

It would instill a truly fascinating sense of dedication in its transfers, to say the least. Or perhaps no one is like that at all, and it is just that you have made a mistake with no way to fix it. Maybe you should have stayed in Amity after all, been content with familiar nothingness and learned to fake your smiles at least as well as your mother, or save your anger for when no one can see it, like your father.

You don’t think you were meant for Amity, though, not really. It vexed you to no end, the simplicity of it all. You did enjoy the painting, the artists that sprung up in every corner, common as dandelions, but that wasn’t the end of it. The rules were chafing yet vague, the expectations ever-changing. It should have come as no surprise that you would leave.

Besides, you did well in Dauntless initiation, to the great surprise of just about everyone there. They saw your brightly colored clothes when you leapt from the roof, but soon enough you blended in with the lot of them and people would double take when you told them you hadn’t been born in Dauntless proper. The thought that you could be from Amity of all places was insane, and had it not been for the fact that you still remember the waving gold of the fields, the high flying birds that soared above your head, you would have believed it as little as your new friends.

Despite your best attempts to immediately separate yourself from your former faction, you couldn’t shake the memories completely. That’s why you didn’t shoot for one of the top jobs or security positions. Those were snapped up by the really good kids, the ones who aren’t just not carefree but genuinely heartless.

You ended up taking a position among the ranks of tattoo artists and quickly soared to the top. Amity had taught you clarity and control in your art, and soon you were known for your original designs. More often than not, Dauntless looking for a new pattern would ask you to draw something directly as opposed to just using one of the countless templates already printed out.

It gives them a sense of originality, for one thing. No one tattoo is ever the same when it comes to your works. It saves members of the faction from the embarrassing experience of showing off a new tattoo just to see the guy across from you roll up his sleeve to reveal the exact same thing.

Soon enough, your name has spread far and wide across Dauntless, and you get more and more customers by the day. That’s how you know that you ended up choosing the right faction and way of life after all, and it’s also how you meet Eric Coulter for the first time.

Eric is somewhat of a mixed bag. He only graduated from initiation a year or so before you, so he didn’t lead your training when you first joined the faction. You’ve heard he’s a total killer, both in the fighting ring and at every other moment of the day, so you were more than a little uneasy when he first darkened the door of your shop.

You’re not really sure what you expected when he showed up in the beginning. That he’d yell at you, maybe, like you’d heard in whispers. Apparently he’d go off on anyone if he felt the need– someone taking the wrong water glass in the mess hall, or an idiot trainee who didn’t get ready in time– or he could have just been there to complain about some failed regulation you didn’t know about.

Instead, he was nice, actually, which was somehow even more unsettling than if he’d just been the harsh training leader he is to everyone else. He’d spent a lot of time admiring your works, even offering up a rare compliment here and there. At last, he’d decided on an initial design, and taken a seat on your chair.

Most clients talk at least a little while you’re tattooing them. New initiates usually rattle off their difficulties, grateful for an ear that won’t judge them or try to use their weaknesses to gain a position or two in the rankings. Experienced Dauntless sometimes swap gossip or discuss various pieces of information they’ve heard from contacts in other factions. Others just stay silent the whole time, thinking through ideas they’ll barely even hint at to you.

One of your friends has tattooed Eric before, and they told you he’d been absolutely icy the whole appointment, hardly even saying a word except to point out which tattoo he wanted. Maybe he’d just had a bad day then, because you and Eric actually end up talking the entire time. 

He complains about the initiates being unable to so much as tie their shoes without needing his directions, and laughs when you counter his stories with what you’ve seen outside of the scheduled training hours. Eric asks you about how you started tattooing and seems genuinely stunned that you grew up in Amity.

“It doesn’t seem possible,” he tells you over the hum of the tattoo needle, “you’re, like, normal.”

You laugh at that. “The Amity are normal, Coulter.”

He narrows his eyes. “They’re weird. Happy-go-lucky strangers. Not you, though,” he adds quickly, “you’re tough. A real Dauntless.”

“Don’t worry, I won’t take offense if you insult the Amity,” you grin, “I left for a reason, believe me on that.”

Eric frowns. “What was the reason, if you don’t mind me asking?”

You sigh, staring at the design you’re working through for a moment before getting up the strength to continue. “I clashed with the higher-ups a lot. If you weren’t totally happy and living life all the time, you felt like you were disappointing them. Everyone there claims that they’re only ever nice to them, but the faction leaders told me I was a screwup more times than I could count. Even my own parents.”

When you risk a glance up, you notice that Eric’s expression has twisted down into something colder, something almost like rage. “They were wrong. They shouldn’t have said that.”

“I know,” you laugh to yourself, “I did well in initiation, obviously they should have guessed that.”

After a while, Eric is convinced to laugh a little alongside you, but the anger doesn’t erase itself from his features for some time. “Yes,” he mumbles almost to himself, “they should have.”

The rest of the session passes without incident. The next day, you find yourself waiting at your empty station. He was supposed to come back to finish the piece, but he’s a few minutes late, and you can’t help but wonder if it’s on purpose, that you said or did something to chase him off. It could be nothing, of course, but you never know.

He ends up hurrying in soon enough, the slightly quickened beat of his walk the only sign that something is on his mind. You look up when he arrives, allowing yourself a small smile. He did come back, then. You were not too much.

“Glad to see you,” you say, “I was worried I scared you off with my inherent Amity-ness. I’ve heard it’s bad for Dauntless. Ruins the whole stoic demeanor if we smile too much.”

His lips twitch upwards briefly, but whatever had been bothering him before tamps that forbidden emotion down soon enough. “No, not your fault in the slightest. Some initiate was using the wrong kind of gun during today’s drills, nearly put another kid’s eye out. I don’t even know where he got the thing, but it happened anyway.”

“Ah,” you say with a knowing look, “Initiates.”

“Always initiates,” Eric grumbles, but he allows his smile to stick this time, and you think that maybe he isn’t as bad as the rumors allow.

The rest of the session is just as good, if not better. Eric is kind to you, says things that grow increasingly apparent to be jokes. It’s funny, you’d always heard that he was this terribly cold guy, but everyone else must have gotten him at a bad time. Either that, or that’s the Amity in you seeing the best of everyone. Still, you’re certain that his good attitude whenever you’re around isn’t faked. It can’t be.

There’s silence from him for a while. You don’t take it personally, or you shouldn’t, anyway– Eric’s a busy guy, you know that from his words alone if not from always seeing him rush around the compound. He’s a Dauntless leader, he’s not going to be hanging around a tattoo shop unless he’s actively getting new ink.

Then, about a week or so later, he comes back in. Busies himself with looking at the patterns for a while even though you both know he’s not going to get something anyone else could have. This time, he talks to you, asks what you wish you got to draw more often. When you answer, he has you put that in his latest design. It makes your stomach tie itself in tight knots, more intense than even when you’d thrown yourself off the roof on your first day on Dauntless earth.

Confusingly, Eric stops you when you’re about halfway through, says that’s all the time he’s got and that he’d like to continue tomorrow, if that’s alright with you. You ask him if he minds having an incomplete tattoo on his arm and he just laughs, tells you he’ll pull his sleeves down or something. It’s a terrible excuse, but it’s what he wants and so that must be what you want, too. It’s good business. You can tell yourself that when you’re lying awake at night, wondering just what you’ve gotten yourself into.

Eric comes in almost every day, demanding increasing progress on his tattoos. You don’t know why he insists on doing them piecewise– it’s not pain tolerance, he’s got more of that than anyone around and it’s not like Dauntless Leader Eric Coulter would ever admit to something pathetic like pain. It must be something else, then. It must be.

The tattoos spiral and change as they spread across his skin. They’re a mess, to be honest, no cohesive pattern, like he’s picking the templates with his eyes closed and only the goal of covering as much flesh as possible. 

You tell him his tattoo sleeves aren’t as coherent as they could be; he laughs, asks you to use your Amity artistry to make some sense of them. He seems unruffled by your accusations of poor taste. Later that same day, Eric punches someone’s nose in because some drunk fellow stumbling out of a party made the mistake of questioning the inked patterns. The idiot said the same things you did, more or less. One of you received a rare smile, the other, a broken bone. It makes no sense.

At some point, he’s going to run out of skin to tattoo. You warn him of this and he grins, flashing dagger-sharp teeth at you. Says that’s why he’s asking you to go so slowly with it. Inch by inch, he cedes control to you. You want to question what that means, but some part of you is scared to ask, scared that he’ll change his mind and leave, or worse, ask someone else to do it.

The last day comes, and this time you know it’ll be the end with certainty. Eric asks you to ink his throat in thick stripes, almost like you can see the angles of his spine through the skin. You sit there, trying to focus on your needle, finishing the design, instead of anything foolish like his head in your hands, his eyes resting quietly on you. He can’t talk while you’re working on his neck like this, but the weight of his gaze says enough anyway.

You finish the last stroke and allow yourself to sit there for one final moment, waiting for it all to be over. Your fingers rest on the smooth expanse of his cheekbone, and Eric raises his hand to cover yours.

“Well,” you say at last, trying to keep your voice light, “it’s been an honor to tattoo you, Eric.”

He smiles. The brief, unwelcome thought that this might be the last time you see him do that flashes through your head, and you banish it just as quickly. That’s not something you want to think about right now, if ever.

“I’d say I’m the one who’s been honored,” he returns, “you’ve got the best work in the faction and everyone knows it.”

You feel some small surge of pride in your chest when he says it, hot and bright like the Dauntless flames. “Thank you.”

“You can thank me in a different way,” he offers, “Drinks tomorrow night, maybe? On me?”

You smile back at him. “I think I’d like that.”

“Good,” he grins, standing so he can look down at you. “I’ll pick you up then. It’ll be fun. Maybe you can teach me some of that Amity optimism.”

You can’t help but laugh at that. It would suit him, you think, smiling more, trusting you so he can let down his guard. Looking at him, at how his eyes brighten when he laughs, you think it already does.

divergent tag list: @dindjarinneedsahug, @poisonmenegan, @ozyynka, @rogueanschel, @with-inked-solace, @gods-fools-heroes, @23victoria, @manyfandomsfanvergent, @imwaysthelastchoice, @drinking-tea-and-be-obsessed, @crazyhearttragedy, @alex-1967s-blog

[thy-valhallen]

I don't think we talk enough about Tim being the first Robin who was fully from a time in which, from being a child with concrete memory onwards, the Batman and Robin were known entities.

Jason was alive and around, yes, but for Tim, Batman and Robin have been a solid fact of life throughout most of his existence. Tim doesn't remember a world without Batman and Robin, and he grew up in this golden age, really: his days of photography and true obsession with the Batfam were squarely in those perfect years where Batman and Robin patrolled Gotham and Nightwing was out in Bludhaven, carving out his own territory and name for himself. Sure, not great for them behind the scenes, but Robin #1/Nightwing was so obviously incredible at fighting crime that it literally inspired the rest of his generation of heroes. To be a kid, growing up in that era, had to have been wildly intoxicating, honestly-- to see your heroes at their very best, the peak of their performance?

And how much would it hurt to see a cornerstone of your reality crumble when a boy died in an Ethiopian warehouse? Suddenly, the pillars of Tim's life-- Batman and Robin-- were utterly out of balance, and he was so desperate to fix it, he happily stepped into that spot, regardless of how prepared he was to fill it. He's just so sure that it needs filling, by any means necessary.

I mean, even just thinking about his infamous line: Batman needs Robin. He's too young to remember that there was, in fact, a time were Batman operated alone. In reality, I think it's a bit less accurate to say that Batman needs Robin than it is to say that Tim believes Batman needs Robin.

And all this, in contrast to that fact that he should've been the one with a completely normal life. I mean, Dick, Jason, and Duke were pulled in by their tragedies, Steph, Damian, and Cass by their families. Tim though? He should've been a rich kid from Bristol forever. He should've stumbled on the truth of the Batfam and stumbled on past it, let it go. He should've become the head of Drake Industries someday, his parents uninvolved with the Rogues or any other madness of the city. But he didn't. Instead, this boy, who could've lived a perfect, happy life, abandoned all of that because he saw his heroes needed saving and had to try. Even when his idols turned him away and brutally denied him, he fought for it anyway, simply because he saw an imbalance that needed correcting.

doesn't it make it feel much more... predetermined, that Tim ended up becoming a Robin, knowing that this was all he knew? That Tim was inspired by this era of heroes, surrounded by it, to such a degree that-- being Tim-- he didn't have any choice but to follow in their footsteps?

I dunno, something about the idea of Tim being fated to be Robin, that he grew up surrounded, entranced by heroism to the point that, when an insane opportunity knocked, he answered without hesitation... i really like it

[tranquil-ivy]

I’m going to go insane if Tumblr scraps one of my ask’s again. Gonna reveal my identity at this point. ☹️ (You wish.)

BUT OH MY GOODNESS YES YES YES, A THIRD BABY IS POSSIBLE!!!

I personally feel like Violet would be around 13-15, and Cecilia 9-10. (You can adjust with the age gap etc.) So they’d be a little older now, barely teenagers now.

Of course, the pregnancy was an unexpected thing. Both you and Leon never thought the two of you would have another baby, but nonetheless, the two of you had to deal with the consequences of your horny actions. 🙄

Violet and Cecilia would absolutely hate the two of you at first. Big sisters? Hell no. They’d literally run out of the living room yelling and slam the door to their separate rooms in frustrations. But what could the two of you do? Just wait and let them get over it…

At first, it was such a weird thing to them…Seeing their mom with a belly…Ew. And how Leon would give you double the attention made them get the ick, they were already used to y’all acting like horny teenagers but oh my god.

But alas, as soon as they met their little baby brother, oh, it was like it was the greatest thing in the world! The two of them would constantly beg to hold him, fighting over who gets to unfreeze the milk from the fridge and make him a bottle.

They’d both play with him, volunteer to even take him off of your hands for the day. (Which never lasted because they regret it as soon as he has a stinky diaper.) The two would also very much criticize his outfit choices. Every single onesie and little outfit you put on him had to be approved by his big sisters.

I also feel like they’d come up to you in the middle of target with a bunch of baby toys and clothes saying that he’d absolutely love them, and you just had to sign and give in.

- Anon! 🎀

Tumblr has been a Cunt to me the past few days with asks. I'm about to delete my whole account if it doesn't get fixed (I'm being dramatic.)

Leon and his wife would even be shocked they could have babies still... Not unhappy but you'd look him dead in the eyes and tell him "I'm getting my tubes tied or you're getting a vasectomy. No more kids."

Violetta (12) would definitely want nothing to do with the baby at first. She's almost a teenager and her parents having another kid at their DECREPIT AGE?!

So Embarrassing 🙄

Cecilia (8), still very young and impressionable would probably just be following her sisters lead but secretly be excited to finally have some to boss around.

But Violet (being the older pain in the ass sister she is) would probably get to Lia and drill it into her head that middle kids get forgotten and oh nooo she's the middle child

Make her sister cry, get grounded and her phone taken away for that.

But once their mother starts showing, Lia comes around immediately. Cuddles up with mommy on the couch whenever she can just to be close to the baby. Violets still super hesitant and not happy about it. Especially every time her dad shows you affection and like... Bucket loads of affection.

He missed seeing you pregnant. That pretty glow you'd always exude even just existing in his presence. And your cute pregnant waddle! He could go on for hours how much he loves when you're pregnant. This is a completely new experience for Lia, Violet hardly remembers what happened when you were originally pregnant with Lia . She was way too young to remember.

Time comes around when you find out the babies sex, Leon fully preparing for a 3 for 3 on the princess counter.

It's a boy... He's devastated at first. He really wanted another girl. But you on the other hand are relieved. You wanted a little boy. Not that you don't love your daughters it just be nice to have a son too. Eventually he's okay, especially after you tell him this means you need to have more renovations done to the house so there's room for the new baby. That means a new room to make into a nursery, something they didn't get to do with Lia but this time around they will.

Closer to the due date you start going over names for the baby. Leon suggesting Marvin as a middle name, you know the context of it and accept it immediately. Everyone starts throwing names around, Violet staying quiet. Lia suggests calling him Puppy...

"That's not a name honey." You chuckle at her suggestion when Violet looks at Leon.

"What's your middle name Dad?"

"Scott." Violet looks between her parents, shrugging.

"Scott sounds good to me."

You and Leon look at each other and smile. Agreeing it's a good name.

Time comes around to have the baby. Violets still against the kid, Lia's bouncing off the walls excited to meet her baby brother. You give birth and the girls are allowed in the room finally.

Both girls look mostly like a good mixture of the two of you... Leon could never deny Scott as his son (he never would) because the kid looks exactly like him. Dusty Brown hair from his younger years, cute little nose, big blue eyes and a butter ball of a chunky baby. He's absolutely precious.

Lia gets help from Leon to hold him since she's still younger. Violet keeps her distance until she walks over to check on you and make sure you aren't too tuckered out. Leon basically traps Violet between a chair and her only escape, offering her to hold her brother if she sits down. She agrees just to get this over with.

She has little Scott in her arms. He looks up at her smiling with those big blue eyes... 3. 2. 1...

She's crying. Won't stop talking about how cute he is or how much she loves him already. You and Leon share a look before he tries taking the baby back.

"He needs skin to skin time with mommy." She whines, reluctantly handing him over.

After that day you basically have two live in nanny's. Both girls wanting to help.

Unless it's diaper related...

[valen-nidk]

Prev. | Interlude |

「 Radiosilence (QPR Reader and Alastor) 」

Content: Mostly angst; t.w.: panic attack, anxiety attack, swearing, fear of abandonement, Charlie doesn't get paid to be a therapist.

"God fucking damn it", they turned on their heels as they kept walking, grunting and cussing. Their eyes focused on a chair as they kicked it across the room, effectively breaking it. Hands gripping their hair and lightly tugging at it. "How could he do this to me?!".

"I, ah, what if we take deep breaths..?", Charlie stuttered, the princess of Hell looking anxious at how this particular room was an absolute wreck, even the windows were broken — maybe she needed a hotel manager or someone with more experience than her and uhh, maybe let Vaggie pick who gets to stay in through an interview process..? The demon before her simply stared at her with a sharp glare that made her feel small.

"You have to excuse me, Charlie but, I can't take a deep breath when I feel like suffocating", such words were accompanied by them scratching the skin from their neck all the way down to their collarbone with their claws that were poking out, slightly tearing the skin and bleeding. Somehow that helped to ground them and not spiral out of control. "I can expect betrayal from everyone but him, we are waaay past that stage, we grew up together, aged together, and he disappears?! What the Hell am I supposed to expect? To feel? It's like my metaphorical heart has been ripped apart and torn into pieces, my ribcage hurts when I breath, fucking Hell!", grabbing a book from the small bookshelf, the demon named (Y/N) growled and tossed it against the wall, denting it. They were breathing heavily as they tried to calm down, usually Alastor would know how to calm them down but he was the cause.

"Charlie, you don't understand, he and I... I can feel he made a poor choice because he was cornered and not knowing what he did is driving me insane, I have a deep connection with him. Hell, if he breathes the wrong way I know what the fuck is up—". Explaining their relationship was complex, usually they got misunderstood because apparently someone couldn't care about another without having romantic feelings or whatever.

This feeling was far more complex, they were more than family and friends, soulmates was a bit of a stretch... perhaps a mirror of one another in some fancy manner of speech? And ocasionally engaged in exchanges that could be interpreted in a different light, but romance wasn't it. They had a mutual connection but no carnal desires, their company was an anchor to ground them, it was a comforting bond.

Whatever social need they required, they could satisfy with each other without any misunderstanding or, at least, if there was one then it could be easily fixed with a conversation over a hot beverage with jazz playing on the background.

But Alastor broke their bond without any fucking explanation.

"Fuck, fuck!", (Y/N) cried as they held their face, falling onto their knees. Their vision blurry due to tears rolling down their cheeks, they were having trouble breathing.

[stormsthatrage]

Concept: Time-traveling Shinji, whose consciousness took over his younger body, press-ganging the young captain Urahara Kisuke into visoring the other Visored ahead of schedule.

Because the Visored are pack. They're fraccion. And that means they don't live without each other, damn it. Their bond is sacred, soul-deep, and not a single one of them wouldn't fight tooth-and-nail, wouldn't commit atrocities, to fix its severing.

So Shinji, upon arriving in the past, immediately hits up Kisuke. Shinji, of course, has spent enough time with the younger captain to know exactly how to convince him of the truth of the Aizen-induced apocalypse. (Aizenocalypse? Anyway.) Shinji also knows how to emphasize the increased power that comes from being Visored, and how necessary that type of power is in fighting Sosuke Aizen.

So poor Kisuke, under immense pressure from Shinji, finds himself luring various captains and lieutenants into his lab, one by one, over a period of a few weeks, to corrupt their soul. He feels like he's become some sort of horror story villain.

(Shinji does not tell him that, in the future-that-won't-be, Kisuke was framed for doing exactly what he's currently actually doing.)

As soon as each victim is visored, the fraccion-bond snaps into place with those that have already been visored. After a minor initial freak-out, they each quickly find themselves over the deception, agreeing that it was the right choice.

They also all get vague memories and emotional impressions from their future selves, thanks to the traces their future selves left on Shinji's spiritual energy. This has two effects. First, their control over their hollow powers is instinctual, as they essentially have the experience of their future selves. Second, they have a sudden and deep closeness to each other that is impossible to hide from outsiders.

Imagine. One by one, they go down to Kisuke's lab, and resurface with a personality change and a new and powerful ability to give the heebie-jeebies.

Kisuke is pulling his hair out at how suspicious it looks, and how utterly insane his life has gotten.

Also. All of the Visored seem to hover, and he doesn't know why? Before he violated their souls, they were all at best indifferent to him and at worst subtly hostile, and now suddenly they're all very concerned if he's eaten enough or if he's gotten enough sleep? They take turns bringing him meals and forcing him to go home at the end of the day? Instead of, you know, cursing his very existence?????

(What he doesn't know is this: In the future, he was pack, too, even if he wasn't Visored. He stabilized them, and then he and Yoruichi and Tessai -- who were all so young -- took them in at great personal cost. And then those three spent years looking after the Visored, even when none of the Visored knew control and were all wild and rabid and dangerous.

Of course the Visored hover. Of course they worry. Of course they're slightly possessive of their packmate who has no future-memories and doesn't know he's pack.)

Anyway. Imagine the outsider POV. Imagine Kisuke's slow descent into hysteria as he finds himself playing the role of horror-movie villain. Imagine half the upper echelon of the Gotei 13 hiding the fact that they're part hollow. Imagine...

[mylordshesacactus]

How I Run Wildshape

Listen, "wildshape rules are fucking stupid" is not a fresh or hot take. Level 3: You can transform twice a day. Level 19: You can still transform twice a day! But now you can stay transformed for longer.

(Because as we all know, "eight-hour strategy commitments" are the core of how most people play D&D.)

And then of course: Level 20: INFINITE WILDSHAPES! You go from "2 per day" to "UNLIMITED! YOU GET A SQUIRREL AND YOU GET A SQUIRREL AND YOU GET A SQUIRREL, EVERYBODY GETS A SQUIRREL" and that's insane.

Tl;dr: The core appeal to me of playing druid at all is the shapeshifting. I would, genuinely, prefer it if the druid class was a half-caster that focused heavily on the shapeshifting mechanic--and before you all pile onto me in the notes, I know there's barbarian subclasses that bring in some shifter flavor, but that's not really what I'm talking about. I want to play a druidic shapeshifter.

So here's how I house-rule Wildshapes at my table (if, of course, the player is interested--I'm not out here forcing OTHER people to play THEIR characters the way I prefer, come on now) and then, just for fun, a couple of wildshape variants I've thought up but never had the chance to really play with, that DMs might offer as optional druidic feats.

If anyone with more experience and skill than me at putting together subclasses ever wants to yoink these, please do. Please. Someone fix this.

Core Wildshape

The no-frills replacement to RAW wildshape, just a 1:1 replacement.

You have a number of Wildshape charges equal to half your Druid level, rounded up.

Each Wildshape charge allows you to take one animal form, with restrictions as listed on the Beast Shapes table, for up to one hour.

There are no "partial charges," so transforming for five minutes uses the full charge just as if you'd transformed for a full hour.

Charges can be chained together seamlessly; if you choose to remain transformed past the first hour, you simply expend another Wildshape charge. You can also move directly from one Wildshape form to another by expending a new Wildshape charge. (This isn't Animorphs; you don't have to "re-transform" between charges.)

Wildshape Variants

Variant: Feral

(Prerequisite: Druid level 8)

Your communion with nature has made you as comfortable in the form of animals as in your own skin--if not more so.

You have a number of Wildshape charges equal to your Druid level. Beginning at level 12, your Wildshape forms can have a CR equal to 1/3 your Druid level, rounded down.

Variant: Druidic Avatar

You have achieved deep congruence with one of your animal forms, such that it has become tightly associated with you. Choose one wildshape form of size Small, Medium, or Large as your avatar.

While in this form, you can cast spells as normal, replacing verbal components with appropriate animal noises, as long as any necessary material components are physically present (being absorbed into your wildshape form when you transformed counts).

You can choose to alter your avatar when you take a long rest. Once you have done this, you cannot alter it again until one month has passed.

Variant: Deepwoods Shifter

Your travels in the wildest and most remote woodlands have given you a deep understanding of many forms of life beyond simple beasts--forms of life that are, to you, no less natural.

You have a short list of Deepwoods forms. Choose one non-humanoid creature, of no higher than CR 1, of a type other than Beast, to begin this list. Every time you are given the option of an ability score improvement (applied retroactively), you may choose another non-Beast, non-humanoid creature form with a CR of 1/3 your Druid level, rounded down, to add to your list.

These choices can be altered whenever a new form is added to the list.

[onnoffwrites]

I have been losing my shit over this damn panel for the past THREE DAYS (more or less) and I need to yell somewhere so it's gonna go here.

It all began when I was writing my fic (I think this was for My Immortal), and I needed to recap significant hakukai moments. And I remembered "hey, I should include this one thing saguru said during sunset manor that was stupidly super gay for no fucking reason" bc like, yea hakukai not canon, but if canon was gonna give me a whole ass confession then I might as well use it. So, like always, I head to mangadex to look for this panel... Except... It's not there... The line... The line's not there... But I remember... I remember something about "the only one to disrupt/disturb my thinking/mind"... Where... I didn't imagine that right? I mean I read a lot of google translated Chinese fanfics but... I REMEMBERED reading that line... In a manga... In English... ON mangadex...

This is where I should mentioned, that if you weren't around for the Great Collapse of Mangadex. Then... Well, so there was this period of time where mangadex just DIDNT EXIST. Bc there was some cyber?? Attack??? On the site??? I can't fully remember. But it like wiped out most of the site. The mangas r just, gone. So mangadex fixed it. It took a while bc they figured "might as well revamp our site and system". And they did. And it's great. And it looks beautiful now, even more than before.

But see. The line I remembered? Yea... Yea that was from before The Collapse. And mangadex let multiple translation groups submit their translations. So u can read diff translations of diff group, see how things are interpreted differently... And... I remembered this one, that I posted here up top, but I remembered there was another. One that had The Line.

And it was driving crazy so, like usual, I asked my cn friend. But my cn friend (why am I still saying that, it's @beingvv , that's the friend) has A Life, and isn't always online, and we love that for ppl. So. I'm still crazy. I can't trust my own damn mind and memory bc why tf do I remember something that isn't there (happened before btw, but that has nothing to do with this).

Luckily, I have a friend who knows jp. UNLUCKILY, I don't have the jp raws and it's from chapter 300 and we are in the thousands. So, I went back to losing my mind. Until I found it again, and realized. Heyyyyyyy there's a whole ass ANIME. So like the baggage my dear friend had the misfortune to be saddled with, I went to find the ep, timestamped it, yelled begged them for help.

This is where I lose my damn mind the first time in the recent weeks.

(thank you my dear piglet, u don't even go here but u tolerate my insanity)

THIS. THIS WAS THE LINE. THATS WHAT I REMEMBERED.

So, I feel a little more sane (bc my mind didn't fabricate a memory again) and also A LOT more insane bc WHY WOULD U SAY THAT, HAKUBA SAGURU 😭😭😭 WHY WOULD U SAY IT LIKE THAT 😭😭😭

In any case I feel validated. Told beingvv about my discoveries (for whenever they come back) not that they need it cn fandom already got the correct translation. And finished writing my fic.

And then Saguru's comeback was announced.

So I've been losing my shit for 3 days on twitter, looking at all my fave KR and JP accounts and the things they say.

And then someone dug up and old tweet thread that talked about this panel. Specifically, op talked about the nuance in the word choice used.

Here's the og thread if anyone wants to read or Google translate it urself.

(mkppyong my love, bless you)

Bc mkppyong talked to a jp acquaintance about ??? Uh I dunno just language I guess. POINT IS. They pointed out that gosho used specific words/phrases that really wasn't needed if all he wanted to say was "the only one who drives me crazy/mad." But he did used them. It's specifically "his thoughts/mind" that's being driven crazy. And that if he wants to just talk about Saguru's mind being disrupted/confused, then there's rly no need to use the words "go crazy"

And then they wrote out a whole symbolism about clocks and saguru and being broken down/disrupted and I lost my shit over the clock symbolism, sue me 😭😭😭

I don't think I'm making sense anymore bUT WAIT, THERES MORE, THE FINAL BLOW

THE THAI TRANSLATION

This is where I expose myself more than I ever want to, but here's a fact. I'm thai

Here's a second fact. I'm SHIT at Thai. I've been bad at this language before I got good at English. My Thais as good as an elementary student. Every time I understand difficult words I get confused bc where did I know THAT from???

In any case, point is, I saw that tweet, read the text, immediately understood it and began losing my shit all over again... And then I doubted... Bc like, I'm not good with this lang anymore... Maybe im understanding it wrong? So I look up Google.

Google: คลุ้มคลั่ง just means go crazy

So I was like, damn guess I'm wrong, read too much into this. BUT SEE BC I LIVE HERE I HAVE FRIENDS WHO ARENT A DISGRACE. And so my friend said:

SO WELCOME TO MY THIRD ROUND OF INSANITY.

HAKUBA SAGURU WHY WOULD U SAY THIS SHIT IN FRONT OF LIKE NINE OTHER PPL 😭😭😭😭😭 BOY WHY R U TELLING THEM UR OBSESSED 😭😭😭 youre driving ME crazy 😭😭😭

So. Here we are. At the end. I have no idea how tf I'm supposed to end this post. I'VE been obsessed for 3 days straight. I don't have a lot of braincell left in me (there weren't any to begin with). I don't have a statement to wrap this post up in a nice little bow. Go make ur own conclusion I dunno.

But I would not have been losing my shit over this stupid panel for a month if it wasn't for the fact that eng translation was missing a pretty crutial thing in what Saguru said. I don't know if this was a mistranslation or a misunderstanding or something, but the English translation was lacking. And I love and have always been thankful and grateful to the ppl who worked hard to translate mangas in their free time, and do it all for free, bc I haven't had any real way to rent/borrow mangas from renting shops/libraries in years. So this was one of the only ways I can read mangas. But, even as I checked the raw panel with Google lens just now, even google translate it as "the only one to make my thoughts go round." No where was there any mention of "case" and "solving." So that's just, multiple accounts of ppl who knows jp, including native jp speakers, all saying that this panel is Saguru saying "the only one to drive me crazy". And man I rly hope this doesn't make me come off as ungrateful or like shitting on the translation team, I'm rly not. But yea. Uh. The translation was wrong. And I remembered that there used to be a diff eng translation. And it led me to go to all this trouble and journey to find out what was actually said. And here we are, at the end.

The only one who could disrupt Saguru's thinking.

The only one who could disturb Saguru's mind.

The one whose sole existence drives him mad.

The only one to make his mind obsess over till he's driven to madness.

Or to use the symbolism mkppyong wrote: the only one to break down the clock, the precise and accurate mechanism, that is Hakuba Saguru.

[victoriously-wicked]

LIST OF SOME JORI/VICTORiOUS FANFIC FOR YOU!

Fanfiction.net links: blue Wattpad links: orange Ao3 links: red

Just a Stage Kiss: There's a fine line between love and hate. What happens when Jade and Tori are partnered together for another class at Hollywood Arts, only this time it's not stage fighting, it's stage kissing. Will that line be crossed, or redrawn thicker than before? Ao3 Wattpad Fanfic

I Have No Sister: Oneshot. Trina had done the worst thing on the day of her sister's wedding. Disgraced, she starts a new life in NYC. But a blast from the past has a bone to pick with Trina Vega. Fanfic

They Say a Bad Girl Will Shatter Your World, Drive You Insane: Tori needs to seem more mature for an audition and decides it's time to take a real risk. And what is more dangerous than dating the girl who used to hate your guts? Based on the episode 'The Gorilla Club'. Fanfic Ao3

Let’s Show the World That Science is On Our Side: Sequel to "they say a bad girl". Their relationship is the best and the strangest thing that's ever happened to Tori. You can't really blame her if she's still trying to figure it out. Fanfic Ao3

I Think You Know Me: Oneshot. Beck plots to get Jade and Tori back together. Andre just wants to stay in one piece. Twist from 'Tori Fixes Beck and Jade.' Fanfic

Shock Value: In one of Sikowitz's classroom exercises, Tori needs to Shock the class. Jade doesn't think Tori's capable of shocking anyone. What does Tori do? Fanfic

Start from Scratch: It's been 3 years since Hollywood Arts and Jade's life hasn't worked out like she wanted it too. Fleeing her past, she must start over from stratch and finds her only refuge is with a person with her own personal demons, Tori Vega. Can the pair rebuild their lives and perhaps even find love along the way. Fanfic Wattpad

Our Story: Jade's deadly secret caused Beck to leave her, but Tori came into her life and made everything better. Now, Jade's life is done hanging in the balance, right? She's been told she's safe, so why does it feel like everything is about to come crashing on her and her friends? Fanfic

Behind Enemy Lines: How Yerba changed everything. Wattpad Fanfic

You Don’t Know Me: Jade and Tori are forced to work together on a group project for school. And when Tori visits Jade's house one day and her father is drunk, Tori realizes that Jade may not be the person she always thought she was. Fanfic

Replay: I never thought I'd be where I am now when I took my sister's place in that showcase. It definitely brought changes I didn't expect. But now that I'm here, I wouldn't change it for the world. Ao3 Fanfic

You’re Worth It: Tori's determined to get Jade to become friends with her no matter how many times Jade's threatened her and screamed at her. What happens when Jade starts to hang out with Tori more and realises that she doesn't seem to be feeling as much of a strong connection with Beck as she used to. Will Jade tell Tori her deepest secrets? Will Tori confess her love? They must endure a long, bumpy road together, but will it be worth it? Wattpad

A Dangerous Friend: Everyone needs at least one crazy friend, and it looks like Tori's found hers. Ao3 Wattpad

My Best Friend’s Girlfriend: Hello there...my name is Tori. Tori Vega. I'm a little nervous at the moment...so bear with me? Well I have a confession to make...it's a hard one at that. I um...well I moved here to Hollywood just a little while back and am now going to school with my childhood best friend. Then something happened... I never planned it to happen. I just... well... I accidentally fell absolutely and uncontrollably in love, with his girlfriend. Wattpad

Violated: Tori Vega, good girl, straight A student, musical master. No one would have expected her to be forced with a life changing trauma. But she did. She had many to turn to but who was her choice? Jade West, bad girl, possible straight A student, Musical, acting and producing master. She hates Tori with a passion, yet no one knows why, Jade herself doesn't know. But what happens when her enemy appears at her doorstep crying and in need of someone to help her? Fanfic Wattpad

Where’s Tori: 9 years ago, Jade's life was shattered, when her girlfriend Tori, vanished. After many years, Jade has long since given up hope of seeing Tori again.  But what happens when the Impossible happens? Fanfic Wattpad

Twist of Fate: Tori is paralysed and Jade is blind. Two lives drastically affected by fate. Two people who don't realize, how much each needs the other. But fate can be kind as well as cruel, which they soon come to realize. Slight AU. Wattpad Fanfic

The Lock-In: Locked in a building for 48 hours with 238 other high schoolers isn't exactly the greatest weekend. And nobody knows that more than André Harris, Beck Oliver, Cat Valentine, Trina Vega, Robbie Shapiro, Tori Vega, and Jade West . . . especially Tori Vega and Jade West. The lock-in begins. 48 hours to go. (Jori friendship.) Wattpad

The Last Resort: Jade has become completely catatonic since the death of her fiancé in a tragic accident. Not responding to any treatment or words from family and friends, they turn to the one person who hasn't tried, to try and bring her back. A person who once broke Jade's heart. Her ex girlfriend, Tori Vega. Wattpad Fanfic

The Impossible: A certain student at Hollywood Arts that no one’s noticed before is suddenly involved with the gang for her Kickback performance. But she has also revealed that she is a 'great fan' of Jade West and Tori Vega and decides to let the two girls approach to help her. Who is this girl? Will she reveal who she is when Victoria Vega and Jadelyn West, one of the most talented [and hottest] students at Hollywood Arts, approach her based on curiosity and interest? Ao3 Wattpad

#GrandFinale: Caterina Valentine is just weeks away from graduation. She understands things are about to change for her and her closest friends at Hollywood Arts. But her feelings for her best friend and roommate, Sam, have already been changing...and Cat realizes it might be time to be honest about them. Sam Puckett doesn't like people or connections. People always leave. Connections always hurt. Then she met Cat and her entire world changed. But with graduation weeks away, Sam fears she's going to get left behind again. Maybe it would be better if this time, she did the leaving. Past and present collide as Sam and Cat face the uncertainty of the future. But will they face it together, or alone? It's been a long time coming. Welcome to the #GrandFinale! Ao3 Fanfic Wattpad

The Untold Jori: Sequel to “#GrandFinale”. With graduation in her rearview mirror, Jade West finds herself on the cusp of a fantastic opportunity: the chance to direct a short film. It's not her style or genre, but a successful film will lead to funding for her own feature film, a story so important to her she might be willing to take the deal. Much to Jade's frustration, the best person for the lead role to ensure its success is none other than Victoria Vega. But Tori is long gone, and Jade resents the idea of asking her to be in the film. It's the reunion neither of them wanted, with a result neither of them expected. Ao3 Fanfic Wattpad

One Last Song: Sequel to “The Untold Jori”. Victoria Vega: successful actress, prominent scream woman, married to the love of her life for nearly a decade...and, as she approaches age thirty, a woman wondering what happened to the dreams of her youth. A mysterious call from an old flame may just awaken those dreams once more, but at what cost? Jade West: one of the most celebrated masters of horror and thrillers in Hollywood. But when the social media mob descends on Jade for an innocent remark, her future in the industry is suddenly on shaky ground...and the one she depends on the most, her rock, Tori, seems to be more distant than ever. Jade fears her dream may be coming to an end...and what she will wake up to when it's over. After a string of successful broadway shows, Cat Valentine has spent years at the top of the pop charts as the sensational "Caterina". She and her longtime love, Samantha Puckett, have settled down in Sam's hometown of Seattle, where Cat records her music. But one morning, Cat wakes up to find Sam gone without a trace; not even her beloved motorcycle remains. In a panic, Cat hunts down her best friends, Tori and Jade, to help her find out where Sam went, and why? All three women stand at the brink of their most difficult challenges. Can the girls and their friends endure, or will all three be torn apart forever? Join Tori, Jade, Cat, Sam, Carly, and more for one last adventure...and one last song. Ao3 Fanfic Wattpad

One Last Time: Jade and Tori had always felt some unspoken thing between them, but never acted on it. On Tori's last night in LA, a certain song by their friend brings Jade to do just that, but is it already too late for them to be anything more than friends? Ao3 Wattpad Fanfic

Postgrad Partners: Sequel to “One Last Time”. As Tori is about to leave LA for a record deal in Miami, she and Jade hastily decide to move in together and explore their relationship and postgraduate lives. What challenges await to test this newfound couple? Ao3 Wattpad Fanfic

HAVE FUN READING!

[baronessblixen]

Fictober 2023

All the stories in one place. A huge thank you to everyone for their support this month.

Day 1: Secret Spots - This is cotton candy-flavored fluff set after "Millennium": Mulder and Scully go to Mrs. Scully's house and find themselves all alone for a moment...

Day 2: Just in Case - This is angst/hurt/comfort with a dash of hopeful cheesiness. Starts off in Dod Kalm (yes, you read that right). Mulder decides to be brave in what he believes to be his last moments on earth.

Day 3: The Deepest Cut - Diana/IVF angst (with a soft ending): Scully is already upset about a colleague's pregnancy and then Diana shows up and makes things worse.

Day 4: Always Expect The Unexpected - Some soft, fluffy silliness today: Scully and Mulder see her mother out on a date with... A.D. Skinner?

Day 5: If I Were The King of The World - Fluffy-fluff set in Detour: We get to see a bit more of Scully singing to Mulder...

Day 6: In The Blink Of An Eye - Angst/Mulder in peril: Mulder happens to be at the wrong place, at the wrong time...

Day 7: Glimpses of October - Post-IWTB/Pre-Revival vignette: Mulder watches his son play in the fallen leaves. Or is he?

Day 8: A Very Queequeg Morning - Hurt/comfort AND humor after "Pusher": Mulder doesn't mind Scully showing up at his apartment after the case at all. Only problem: she's not alone.

Day 9: Talk Vanilla to Me - Rated M/banter/humor(?): Mulder can't sleep, but luckily, Scully is there to listen… and maybe more.

Day 10: Wishes - Fluff(?) post "Je Souhaite": Mulder wants to know what Scully's wishes would have been.

Day 11: Always Partners - Set in season 6, hurt/comfort, some angst: Kersh puts Scully on another case without Mulder and once again she gets hurt.

Day 12: The Easiest Choice - Fluff, rewrite of the last scene in "Existence": Mulder asks Scully what she's going to name the baby.

Day 13: Don't Forget The Cake - Fluff-ish, season 6: Diana throws Mulder a surprise birthday party. Chaos ensues.

Day 14: Preparation is Everything - Fluff, set after "Alone": With Mulder being unemployed, and Scully on maternity leave, they spend their time thinking about furniture, baby names, and all the ways their lives will change.

Day 15: Temporary Insanity - Angsty first kiss fill-in for "Paper Clip": What happened on that elevator ride?

Day 16: Mothers Always Know - Post-ep (sort of) for "Chimera", fluff: It's the Sunday morning after Mulder stayed over at Scully's and he has a somewhat awkward run-in with her mother.

Day 17: In Sickness And in Health - Hurt/comfort post-"Arcadia": They're on their way back home from The Falls at Arcadia when Scully gets sick.

Day 18: Beautiful In My Eyes - UST-filled post-ep fic: Mulder thinks Scully is the most beautiful person wherever she goes. She doesn't believe him so he tries to make her see it his way.

Day 19: It's Us Against The World - Angst, canon divergence for "Nothing Important Happened Today": No matter what Kersh said, Scully doesn't want Mulder to leave her and the baby. But what choice do they have?

Day 20: Shooting Stars - Mulder and Scully sharing a bed during two nights in The Rain King. After a first awkard night, what happens during the second one after the party ?

Day 21: No Longer Stuck In The Past - A different kind of post-episode fic for "The Unnatural": After his and Scully's baseball date, Mulder runs into Diana.

Day 22: Cookie Theft and Other Crimes - How the Ghosts Stole Christmas post-ep, hurt/comfort, angst, fluff - all the fixings: Bill Jr. runs into Mulder in the middle of the night and it goes as well as you might expect.

Day 23: You're Not Welcome Here - AU in which Diana didn't die and Mulder didn't leave after "Existence": Scully and William are waiting for Mulder when no other than Diana Fowley walks into the basement office.

Day 24: Rules Are Rules - Set in season 7, fluff: They're not supposed to share a room while on assignment. But aren't rules meant to be broken anyway?

Day 25: Another Banner Year - Set after "Our Town", before "Anasazi": Melissa shows up at her sister's apartment, demanding a few answers.

Day 26: I Saw Your Face In A Dream - AU where Mulder and Scully meet on karaoke night at a bar.

Day 27: Christmas With You By My Side - Sequel to day 22 "Cookie Theft And Other Crimes" but can be read as a stand-alone: What happens when Mulder wakes up with Scully in his arms?

Day 28: The Truth Is (Not) Found In A Glass of Whiskey - All Mulder wanted to do was drop off a report. Now he has to deal with a drunk Skinner.

Day 29: Glass Half Full - Sequel to "The Truth Is (Not) Found In A Glass of Whiskey": It's the morning after and Skinner wakes up with a hangover - and remembers way too much from the previous night.

Day 30: Feelings You Can't Hide - A post-ep for "Bad Blood" obviously. A jealous Mulder, an attempt at humor and the hint of angst may be found here.

Day 31: Trick or Treat - IVF arc, angsty fluff: They're supposed to go to the Gunmen's Halloween party, but there's something they need to make sure of first.

[lt-natrace]

just saying

Description: your childhood best friend, bob, is getting really sick of the men you date

Content: being cheated on, mentions of the bird strike, mentions of alcohol, going through a man’s phone, little woman quotes, thinking no one will ever love you like you deserve, little bobby being hurt for like 3 minutes but i fix it, childhood best friends to lovers

Word Count: 2.8k

I wrote this for @jostystyles playlist writing challenge and it was supposed to be posted like 3 weeks ago but life happens sometimes. I chose the song just saying but specifically the lyric "he says he loves you but it's all an act". This also wasn't beta'd so any mistakes are mine and you should just ignore them.

“He just gives me a weird feeling, okay?” Bob said once again, earning an eye roll from you as you walked from the bathroom to your closet.

“Bob,” you started, causing him to look up at you, “I’m not having this conversation again.”

He let out a huff of annoyance and crossed his arms like he used when you’d fight as children. After two decades of being Bob’s best friend, he’s never really changed his habits or learned to let you make your own mistakes. Despite what everyone may think looking at your career paths, a wizzo for the navy and a freelance writer, he was the more reserved and anxious one in the friendship. Even as kids, he would be the one to ask if something was a good idea and as teenagers he would always scold you for making bad choices. It was one of the things that made your friendship work so well.

“Whatever,” he replied flatly, standing up from where he was sitting on your bed, “I have to meet Phoenix for lunch, be safe tonight.”

You gave him a small smile and mumbled out an “I will” as he turned to walk out your front door, leaving you alone with your thoughts. He was your best friend but he drove you insane with how critical he was of the guys you went out with. Bob has always found something wrong or suspicious with each of the guys you’ve dated; Jason made you cry too much, Ethan was too flirty, Zach was too old and so on and so forth. Maybe he ended up being right about every single one of them but Carter was different, seriously. He had a stable job at his Dad’s company, took you to nice dinners and the sex wasn’t bad. Despite all these facts, Bob didn’t like him. All it took was one dinner with him and Bob called you on the way home to tell you everything he thought was wrong. It didn’t matter, Bob wasn’t the boss of you and didn’t get to have a say in who you dated, even if it started fights between the two of you.

—-------

A few hours had passed since Bob left your apartment and the sound of loud banging on the front door pulled you from your research. You closed your laptop screen slightly and walked towards the door, slowly checking the peep hole to see who was waiting on the other side. To your surprise you were met with the sight of Bob, frantically fixing his glasses and trying to catch his breath. He jumped slightly as you opened the front door, letting out a sigh of relief as his eyes met yours.

 “Oh thank goodness you haven’t left yet.” He said, pushing past you and turning to face you as he got a few steps into your apartment, “I need to tell you something, it’s really important.”

You’d seen Bob shaken up many times in your life, but this was a whole new level. His hands were shaking, his face was flushed from what you assumed was him running up the multiple flights of stairs and he was pacing back and forth. You watched him for a moment, trying to take in his energy and figure out what could possibly have gotten him so worked up. He stared at you until you motioned him to speak.

“Carter,” he started and you let out a groan of frustration, “No, I’m serious, you need to listen to me. He was at lunch with some girl, she had dark hair and-”

“Jesus Christ,” you cut him off as before verifying the time on your watch, “He was probably getting lunch with a coworker or a business partner.”

“Do you hold hands and pay for business partner’s lunches?” He pushed back as he took a few more steps and began to lean onto the counter. It wasn’t until this moment that you realized how much broader he had gotten on his most recent deployment. You walked to the other side of the island and matched his motion in a sad attempt to stand your ground against him, “He wouldn’t do that to me, he loves me.” You tried, unsure of who you were trying to convince at this point.

“Do you even hear yourself right now? That douchebag has you so wrapped around his fucking finger that you would do anything to defend him, he says he loves you but it’s all an act, he has someone behind your back!” Bob snapped back, his voice suddenly taking up the kitchen. He was never one to raise his voice, especially at a woman and his actions only made you angrier.

“You know what, I know what this is about. You’re jealous,” your voice was laced with venom as you spoke and Bob let out a small laugh, “Yeah, you’re jealous that I’ve found someone I wanna tell everything to and you haven’t. I can’t be that for you forever Bob, it’s time to grow up.”

Bob swore he’d felt his heart break when he had to watch you go to prom with the quarterback or when he couldn’t find Phoenix after their ejection. But this feeling as he watched you walk away from him was worse than heartbreak, this made his stomach turn and he had to fight back the bile rising in his throat. Before you could say anything else, Bob was storming out of your apartment and slamming the door so hard you swore the hinges came off. You and Bob had fought before but never anything like this. You wanted to run after him and tell him you didn’t mean any of it but you couldn’t. Your feet stayed planted in your kitchen, the silence somehow louder than the argument that had just taken place. 

As if on cue, your phone began to ring and a picture of Carter from the last date you two had gone on flashed across the screen. For a moment, you debated ignoring it, Bob’s accusations still heavy in the back of your mind. You pushed them back as you answered the call and tried to hide the shake in your voice.

—----

It’s been nearly a month since your fight with Bob. The two of you had spoken a few times but mainly conversations in passing about your days or if the other was going out that weekend. Bob had tried to make amends a few times but you ignored every attempt, he had no right to step into your relationship and throw accusations like that with not even a grainy picture to back it up. Above all, you were upset that he put such an idea into your mind in the first place. Now you felt like you were putting Carter’s every action under a microscope and looking for a flaw in it, even if you genuinely believed he was innocent. 

You cursed Bob again as you tried desperately to see if Carter had left his location turned on. To your dismay, he hadn’t. He was supposed to pick you up for dinner over an hour ago. It wasn’t the first time he was late but it was the first time he didn’t have an excuse. He had a tough job and was usually forced to stay late at the office working on whatever he did all day. It wasn’t that you didn’t care to ask, he just assured you it was complicated and difficult to understand. Usually you’d pace for a little and then clean up a bit so it looked nice when he got here, but not this time. You sat on the couch, your heels ditched as you refreshed his location again. 

After a few more moments, you heard the spare key clicking the lock of your front door open and sprang to your feet as he opened the door. He was still in his work suit with a bouquet of flowers and a bottle of expensive wine in one hand and take out from your favorite restaurant in the other. You couldn’t help but be slightly disappointed at the canceled plans after the effort you had put in getting ready but you could never turn down a night in, especially after what you assumed was a hard day on his part.

“Woman, my god you look good. If I knew this was what was waiting for me I would have told them to cancel the meeting all together.” He said as you made your way over to him and reached up to kiss his cheek, “Let me grab a quick shower and we can eat, feel free to open that bottle up.”

Usually this action would have warmed your heart but you can’t help but hear Bob’s voice repeating over and over in your mind. You’ve never been the jealous type, if someone wanted to go out and ruin what you had they could go ahead and do it, their loss. However, the sight of his phone sitting on the counter, lost under the flowers caused something to change in your mind. It’s an invasion of privacy absolutely, but what if it just unlocked when you moved it?

A text lighting up his screen pulled you from your thoughts. A picture from someone named Brett flashed across the screen. Against what you were raised to believe was right or wrong, you unlocked it. The picture filled the screen and you saw a t-shirt that you had bought him on someone who was definitely not Brett. She had dark brown hair that fell to one side and the hem was pulled up slightly to reveal black lace. You listened for a second to see if the water was still running before scrolling through more messages. Most of them were plans to meet up at some point but one in particular caught your eye. It was from almost a month ago and he was reassuring her that Bob hadn’t noticed they were at the restaurant. Your stomach turned and you held back a dry heave as you grabbed your phone to take pictures of the messages. 

You pushed back your tears as you heard the water turn off and quickly put the phone back to where it was, preparing yourself to watch his every move as you poured a heavy glass of wine. It only took him a moment to appear back in the kitchen, his suit traded for a pair of sweats and you made your way to him, holding your arms out for a hug. He put his arms around you and you could feel his gaze behind you on the counter, frantic eyes hoping to see his phone in the same spot.

“Oh honey, some guy named Brett texted you while you were upstairs.” You said as you pulled away.

He saw him tense for a moment before quickly relaxing in an attempt to not raise suspicions. He made his way towards the cupboard to grab a glass and you continued, “he said he found one of your shirts, I think it was the one I got you from that concert a few months ago.”

The glass slipped from his hands and he turned around quickly, “It’s not what you think.”

You stared blankly at him as you attempted to control your breathing and stay calm. He really thought you were stupid and would believe him.

“Not what I think?” you questioned, your voice cracking at the end, “What it looks like is while I’ve put my dreams on hold to be your housewife in training, you’ve been going out and fucking an intern while I wait at home, hoping you’ll be home before dinner gets cold.”

He opened his mouth to speak but no words came out. You spoke up again before he got a chance to reply, “Get out”

His face twisted in confusion, assuming he misheard you, “What did you say?”

“I’m telling you to get out, I want my spare key on the counter now and I’ll leave your stuff at your house later.” You replied, shocked at how much you were able to hide the shakiness of your voice. In the nearly year of dating, you had never talked back to him and the shock on his face told you that no one ever had.

It didn’t take long for the anger and shock to fade into embarrassment. In fact by the time your feet felt the cool bathroom tile, a few tears had begun to fall. The sight of the makeup and outfit you spent too much time on in an attempt to impress Carter only made them fall harder. They weren’t out of sadness for the situation but instead for how you treated Bob when he tried to warn you. You stared at your phone for a moment, debating if it was too late to call him. You decided to give it a try anyways and the sight of Bob’s contact photo caused your heart to break even further as the fear that you might have ruined everything hit you. It was an old photo from college that you took as he subtly flipped you off and you wondered if the two of you could ever go back to how it was then.

He picked up on the second ring and the sound of his slight drawl caused a small smile to appear on your face, “Hello?”

You sniffled deeply and heard rustling coming through the speaker, “Are you okay?”

Before you could reply, you heard Bob’s front door slamming and his shoes hitting the pavement quickly. The call was disconnected as he got into his truck and you were left in silence with your thoughts again. You debated changing but couldn’t convince your body to get up and face yourself in the mirror.

The sound of your front door being opened a few minutes later caused you to lift your head from the bathroom floor, “Carter, I told you-” you started before seeing who had opened the door, “Bob? You came.”

“You called.” He replied, kneeling down next to you and pushing your hair off of your face. You couldn’t imagine how you must have looked, mascara beginning to smear under your eyes, your hair getting caught on your dampened cheeks. Despite this, Bob’s face didn’t falter, he only used his hands to push your hair off your face and his thumbs to wipe your cheeks. 

“You were right,” you started as you sat up slightly, your eyes unable to meet his, “I feel so stupid.”

Bob’s body tensed, his jaw clenching as he wrapped his arms around you. This isn’t the first break up Bob had held you through and at this point, it won’t be the last. Despite all the times your exes had tried to get Bob out of your life, he has always been there to pick up the pieces they left you in. 

“I’m scared no one will ever love me,” you whispered so quietly, if it wasn’t for your head against Bob’s neck he probably wouldn’t have heard you. 

You felt Bob’s breath hitch at your admission and another wave of embarrassment washed over you. It was a thought that circled your mind but it was usually late into the night after Carter had turned his back to you and he thought you couldn’t hear him texting on his phone. Bob didn’t say anything for a few minutes and the pit in your stomach only grew. Eventually he spoke, his voice nearly as quiet as yours.

“I have loved you ever since I have known you”

His words hung in the air for what felt like an eternity. His once calm heartbeat was now pounding against yours as the two of you stayed holding each other on the cold tile. The embarrassment and anger from earlier faded to anxious butterflies as you sat up straight to look into his eyes. Half of you expected to wake up and be laying next to Carter, all of this having been a dream. But there he was, the man you have loved since you were a teenager, admitting he felt the same in his spiderman pajama pants. 

Bob cut you off as you opened your mouth, “I’ve waited far too long to tell you and I know this is horrible timing and if you don’t feel the same that’s fine but I have to tell you before I lose you to someone-”

“Shut up,” you mumbled before closing the small gap between the two of you. The kiss was light and slow, unlike any other man you’d ever been with. There was no rush to go to work or get into bed, just this moment and you were determined to make it last.

The two of you sat in a comfortable silence for a while, both trying to absorb the events from the night. Eventually Bob helped you up from the ground, wiped the smeared makeup off and helped you into bed. Not the first time he had done so but the first time it was followed by him crawling in next to you and holding you close. 

[faggot-vampire-dies-epicly]

Respite

Summary: After a really bad argument with your brother Mike, you are left feeling distraught after both of you said things you shouldn't have. As you're struggling to come to terms with what happened, you find comfort in the person you least expected. | Words: 4.225K. Requested by @xxinmyfnafworldxx.

Warnings: Mentions of child disappearance. Mentions of poverty. Cursing, miscommunication, hurt/comfort, family drama, family issues, unresolved romantic tension. Smoking. A bit of an age gap, since Reader is younger than Mike and Vanessa. Fem!Schmidt!Reader.

A/N: Okay, yeah, I know this took long but I was busy, sorry. School is beating my ass, my cousin got into a car accident and a stray dog bit me in the leg. It may not have the same quality as the last one, but I did put in a lot of effort, and I do like how this turned out, so I hope you guys like it too.

Main Masterlist | Vanessa Masterlist | AO3

Nebraska, 1987.

“During autumn, Nebraska is colder than at home. So don’t take off your sweater.”

That was the first thing your dad said when he helped you get out of the car.

Garrett and Mike were already playing tag around the campsite. You chuckled and ran after them, following them into the woods.

That night, at the police station, as you sat beside the only sibling you had left now, you realized your dad was right. Nebraska was indeed colder than Hurricane.

November, 2000.

The past months had been rough.

With Max’s disappearance, you had no choice but to quit your job and stay home to look after Abby while Mike was at work.

After all, Mike had an accident (that he didn’t want to tell you anything about) which caused him to lose another job, which meant even more cost-cutting since he couldn’t keep one job for too long, nor get a high-paying one.

Abby had been there with him the night of the “accident” and she didn’t want to say a thing about it either.

It was driving you insane.

At least things with Aunt Jane had gotten better. But that only was because you had found her passed out in the living room the same night Mike had been injured, and she never came back to bother you and your siblings ever since.

So currently, you were struggling financially, like you always did. 

Mike always got the worst of it.

The smallest portion at dinner, the cheapest clothes, the most worn-out shoes.

You lived in a perpetual state of worrying about him. He would just give you a tired smile, and say, “It’s alright.”

You knew it wasn’t.

Everything changed after Mike lost his job at that old restaurant.

Mike and Abby’s relationship had been magically fixed, or at least that’s how it felt. 

She wasn’t shutting both of you out anymore, and Mike had become more calm and understanding.

There was also Vanessa, the police girl who had stayed a couple of weeks at your house. She was Abby and Mike’s friend and had also been involved in whatever happened in that old place.

Mike had let her stay in the house while recovering from whatever injury she had suffered.

She had slept on the couch. Sometimes you would go to the kitchen for water in the middle of the night, and you would find her awake, looking through the window.

Vanessa never talked much, at least not with you, she seemed to like Mike more. But you would still stay with her until she whispered goodnight and slipped under the blankets.

Sometimes, you would stay even after she had fallen asleep. You were the only one who could wake her from her nightmares after all.

Then she had moved out and you barely saw her. Sometimes she would drop Abby off from school, or Mike would invite her to dinner.

Vanessa was… fine. 

It’s not that you didn’t like her. 

No. 

You liked her very much.

But you didn’t have time to acknowledge what that meant. Much less let her know.

 Not that you were thinking of actually doing it.

After all, it seemed like everyone's life was improving, except for yours.

You still couldn’t go to college like you wanted to, since there were no babysitters around to look out for your little sister.

Mike was still jumping from job to job, getting paid barely enough to help with the mortgage and the basic groceries. And you couldn’t help with that either, since nobody wanted to hire you just for the part-time, and even if they wanted to, Mike wouldn’t approve of it.

And even worse, you couldn’t even go out to make friends, because, even if your older brother had changed, he was still as overbearing and overprotective with you.

You were sure that if you went to look at the meaning of overzealous on the library computers, his name would be the first thing to come up.

It always drove you nuts.

Even if you were young, you were already an adult. You didn’t need him to always keep an eye on you.

You understood it was just a trauma response. You really did.

You were there the day Garrett was kidnapped, after all. You recalled the horrified look on Mike’s face as they were interrogating him. His cheeks were tear-stained, his eyes red-rimmed, and he was so pale anyone could have mistaken him as a ghost.

You could remember him saying, “I just looked away for a second. I swear it was just a second,” to your parents' sorrowful faces over and over again.

Still, it didn’t mean you had to suffer such consequences. You wanted to live a normal life, as normal as you could, regardless of what had happened.

Abby sighed profoundly and shifted on her seat, frowning at her drawing. 

You were in the kitchen, making dinner, and close enough to her to notice her discontent, so you pushed the salad you just finished aside and looked at her.

“What’s wrong, Abz?”

She made a face, meeting your gaze. “My friend from school invited me to have a sleepover tonight, but Mike won’t let me go.”

You frowned. When did this kid make friends at school?

And why were you just finding out about it?

“Well, uh,” you trailed off. “Did he give you a reason? Like, is he going to stay late at work tonight?”

Abby shook her head, looking back at her drawing, and put the crayon she was holding down on the table.

Just then, as if you had summoned him, Mike opened the door and stepped into the house.

Abby and you turned to look at him as he took out his jacket, and stepped out of his shoes.

He smiled at Abby, first, ruffling her hair, and looked at her drawing.

“That’s a good one,” he murmured, looking at Abby. He then turned to look at you.

“What’s with that face?” Mike asked casually.

“Abby told me something interesting,” you said, focusing on the salad again.

Mike hummed, peeking into the pots on the stove, and checked what you were cooking. “What did she say?”

You huffed, setting the salad to the side again.

“Well, first of all,” you turned to look at him. “I have just been made aware that she has a friend in school.”

Mike chuckled softly, leaving the pots alone to face you. “Ah, yes. It’s true, she has a school friend.”

You huffed, frustrated. Did neither of them feel like this was important information? After all the time Abby had struggled to make real friends?

“And also,” you continued, “her friend invited her to a sleepover, and you didn’t allow it.”

Mike sighed, already tired from the conversation. “Yes, that’s true, too.”

“So, why can’t she go?” You crossed your arms.

Mike shrugged. “It's not safe for her.”

You scoffed. “You're unbelievable. It's just a sleepover. What's the worst that could happen? Kids consuming too much sugar? She asking her friend's mom to call you because she misses her room? ”

Mike huffed, shaking his head, and tried to walk away from the conversation.

You followed him across the hall and into his room.

“Come on, Mike. What's the worst that could happen? Seriously.”

Mike sighed, turning to face you while he tossed away his tie. “I don't know – I mean, we don't know these people. God knows what strange habits–”

“Are you hearing yourself?” you said, disbelief clear in your voice. “You’re accusing people you don’t know of being,” you gestured with your hands, “weirdos, just because you’re afraid of letting Abby out of your sight!”

Mike rolled his eyes, scoffing. “I'm not afraid, I'm just being careful! It's my job as an older brother–”

“You won't have control over her all her life. You know that, right?” You argued back. “She might be a kid right now but she’ll keep on growing and things will get out of hand, Mike.”

The conversion was turning into a whole-blown argument. You knew you shouldn't press Mike's buttons further, but it was too late to care about that.

“Y/N,” he said in a warning tone. “Don't start this again.”

You scoffed, “Start what, exactly?”

“You know what. I'm not in the mood to argue.”

“You're never in the mood for anything!” You snapped at him. “All you do is work,” you continued. “Or rather, try to keep your job and watch over us like you're our bodyguard. You are going to asphyxiate us with your intensity.”

“I'm just trying to keep you two safe!”

Your voices were raised so high that Abby could probably hear the discussion from the living room.

“Keep us safe–”

“Oh, please,” he practically mocked. “You know I have reasons!”

Before you could argue back, he continued.

“Abby is a kid. She doesn’t understand the dangers she could be in, and you,” Mike met your gaze, “you think I don't notice how you look at me sometimes? Like I'm ruining your life? Like you hate me?”

You huffed, “I don't hate you! I just– I just want some space, okay?”

Mike scoffed, but you ignored him.

“I want to be able to go out at night, to have a job, and make money not only for us to have something to eat, but to buy things for myself too. I want to stop worrying so much about you!”

You took a long breath, trying to calm down.

“I want a normal life. A normal, relaxing life, Mike. Where I can make friends and go on dates without having to sneak out because you won’t agree.”

“Y/N–” he tried to interrupt.

“No!” you cut him off. “You think I don’t know who I remind you of? You think I don't know that when you look at me, you think of Garrett? You think I don’t hear when you tell Abby I look just like him?”

“That’s not true!” he shook his head, now seemingly hurt. “Look, I'm just trying to look out for you! For you and Abby. I'm your big brother–” he said, exasperated. And that was your last straw.

“We don't need you to protect us! Did you forget what happened the last time you tried to look out for one of us?”

A deafening silence followed. Mike deflated, his words dying in his mouth.

You looked at each other for a second before you realized what had been said.

“Fuck,” you exhaled. “Mike, I'm sorr–”

“Get out.”

“But–” You approached him, and tried to take his hand but he cringed, pulling away.

“Please, just…” he trailed off, not looking at you. “Just leave.”

You looked around, thinking of what to do. 

Something, anything that could change the situation you were in.

But of course, there was nothing to do, at least not until Mike had calmed down.

So you left his room, looked at him one last time, and closed the door.

You stood still outside his door, letting everything sink in. You were still angry, but you also felt guilty.

Using Garrett’s kidnapping as an argument during the discussion was a low blow. If there was a hell, you were fucked.

Running your hands through your hair, you approached the living room.

Abby was still sitting at the dining table, eyes fixated on her now-finished drawing.

“Abby?” you called, softly.

She didn’t react. It was one of those moments when she felt stressed so she wouldn’t acknowledge you– or anyone, for that matter.

You sighed, took your jacket from the coat hanger, and stormed out of the house.

You walked for a while, just following the river.

After a good fifteen minutes, you stopped. It was cold, and your jacket wasn’t warm enough.

You sighed in frustration, kicking rocks into the water, and finally decided to sit on the grass.

“Was it really that serious?” You thought. After all, even if it was annoying, Mike's overprotectiveness had probably saved you from a lot of trouble.

You ripped up handfuls of grass as you stared at the water.

“Yes, it is,” you said out loud. Blaming him for Garrett’s disappearance was shitty, but you knew your anger was justified. Mike couldn’t keep being like this.

Not with you, and not with Abby, either. He needed to understand. To learn.

But how would he understand and learn if you only told him about your frustrations after bottling up and then exploding?

It wasn’t fair to him, either. Mike would just feel like you’re being antagonistic.

Grumbling, you rummaged through your jacket’s pockets. The wind had started to pick up and you needed something to warm up.

You pulled out a cigarette pack and a lighter from the front pocket of your jacket.

You huffed. Mike would kill you if he found out. 

Lighting the cigarette, you took a quick drag and as you put the items away again, you felt something strange in your pocket. 

Frowning, you placed the cigarette between your lips and reached into your pocket, pulling out a folded piece of paper.

Humming, you unfolded it without care, not remembering what it was.

You almost choked on the smoke.

It was a drawing from Abby.

She had given it to you a few weeks ago after you picked her up from school.

It was a drawing of you, her, Mike, and a little airplane toy. Garrett's favorite.

“God-fucking-dammit,” you said, putting the cigarette back in between your lips to avoid getting ash on the paper.

“Language,” a voice behind you said, and you jumped, turning around.

Standing there, with her blonde hair swaying slightly in the wind, was Vanessa.

“Great,” you thought.

Out of all the people you could have run into this situation, it had to be her.

You noted was wearing civilian clothes: jeans, a cheap-looking sweater, and a jacket. Her hair was also down. Very different from her usual everyday look.

“That’s bad for your lungs. You know that right?” she said, pointing to the cigarette between your lips.

You grumbled, turning to face the water again, and she took it as an invitation to sit beside you.

“I mean that,” Vanessa said, staring at you.

You took a drag and blew the smoke away from her. “I know.”

She hummed. “Does Mike know?”

You frowned, looking at your shoes while the cigarette slowly burned in your hand.

“There’s a lot of things Mike doesn’t know about me,” you answered, meeting her gaze.

You stared at each other for a moment before she spoke again. “Can I?” She said, pointing to the cig. You handed it to her, and she took a puff from the cig.

You smiled. “I thought you said it’s bad for your lungs. What changed?”

Vanessa rolled her eyes, blowing the smoke. She took another puff, then looked at you.

“Nothing has changed, it’s still bad,” and as she said it, she threw the cigarette into the water.

You gasped. “Hey, those are not cheap!”

It was her turn to smile then. “I know.”

You huffed. “Between this and Mike’s pills, I think you can be considered an environmental terrorist.”

Her smile faltered. “He told you about the pills?”

You nodded slowly, humming. “Mike tells me everything,” you said with a smile.

You paused, your mind returning to the night that he arrived limping and with several superficial wounds and scratches, and with a trembling Abby beside him.

“Almost everything,” you thought out loud.

Vanessa looked at the glistening water. “What makes you say that?”

You scoffed. “Come on. Something happened to him in that old pizzeria, and he won’t speak about it. Neither will Abby.”

You looked at her. She shifted uncomfortably under your gaze.

“And I’m assuming you won’t, either.”

She cleared her throat.

“It’s…” She paused for a moment, thinking of what to say. “It’s not that I don’t want to. It’s just something I shouldn’t be the one to tell you.”

You sighed, looking towards the water again. “Called it.”

You two stayed silent for a moment before you spoke up again. “How did you find me anyway?”

Vanessa sighed, rubbing her forehead with one hand.

“Oh,” you breathed out. “Of course.”

Mike had told her to find you.

“He's your brother, Y/N,” she said softly. “I'm sure he only wants what's best for you.”

You felt a twinge of annoyance.

"Yeah sure..." you said sarcastically, rolling your eyes. "He's always known what's best for me. Like when he convinced me to leave my job so I can stay home and be a housekeeper.”

Vanessa's brows furrowed. “He did?”

You sighed. “It's… more complicated than that, but… that's how it feels.”

A beat passed in silence.

“I know he's doing it because of Garrett,” you murmured. 

“Doing what?” Vanessa asked carefully.

“This. All of this…” You sighed. “Not letting Abby hang out with her new friend, convincing me to stay home and take care of her...”

She watched you intently, waiting for you to continue.

“I can't go out at night, he's constantly barging into our rooms, I can't date anyone,” you sighed, and she seemed to understand, her expression softening.

Slowly, Vanessa reached out to you, putting her hand on your shoulder.

"I understand that Mike can be overprotective at times, I can't deny that,” she said softly. "I know it must suck not being able to go anywhere or do anything without him always checking on you..." she sighs, looking you in the eyes empathetically. "But we both know he just wants to protect you, even if he’s doing it in the wrong way. He loves you dearly.”

You avoid her gaze, your eyes focusing on the grass underneath you.

“It's worse with me.”

“Why do you say that?”

You smile bitterly. “Because apparently, I’m the only one who looks just like Garrett.”

Silence.

“I–” She began but cut herself off.

“I just wish,” you continued, “he could just try to move on. At least now he's aware it wasn't his fault, but,” you took a deep breath. “I feel like he's still stuck trying to be a protector instead of just being our brother.”

Vanessa stayed silent, and you were grateful for that. You didn’t feel like hearing fake reassurances while talking about Garrett or his disappearance.

“Every time we try to talk about it, it just turns into an argument,” you whispered

“And why's that?” Vanessa squeezed your shoulder. You felt your heart flutter at the gesture.

“I guess… because we're both too stubborn to hear each other out,” you chuckled tiredly, running your hands through your hair. 

Vanessa opened her mouth, but you interrupted her.

“I fucked up today,” you turned to face her. “I kind of… blamed him for Garrett's disappearance.” 

Vanessa seemed shocked by this. Then she sucked in her breath between her teeth.

“That's–”

Your expression turned bitter as you felt your face flush in shame. 

“I know, you don't have to tell me.”

You hid your face in your hands. “He seemed so distraught, so hurt, I can't… I can't stop thinking about it.”

You felt your nails dig into your scalp. “I can’t stop thinking about the pain in his eyes, I can’t unsee the way he just… shrank.” 

Carefully, Vanessa rested her hand on your back, and when you didn't protest, she started rubbing small, comforting circles.

You feel a knot form in your throat.

“I…” you swallowed. “I remember it. The day he disappeared.”

A pause.

“I remember it so vividly,” you huffed a self-deprecating laugh. “I sprayed almost the whole bottle of ketchup on my sweater. Mom guided me to the tent so I could change,” a shaky breath slipped from your lips, and you felt her stomach churn.

The dread, the fear you felt that day would never leave your system.

“Next thing we knew, Mike was running and yelling, desperate. You closed your eyes, the memories flooding your mind.

“Mom, Dad! Help, they took him! They took Garrett!”

You stayed with your eyes closed for a few seconds, as Vanessa kept rubbing your back reassuringly.

“Did you know I had a brother?” She began.

“Really?” You asked with surprise in your voice.

“Mhm,” you could hear her smile in her voice, “we used to be really close. He was always looking out for me.”

“What happened to him?”

Her hand stopped. You tensed up.

“He… disappeared. Many years ago. Just like Garrett.”

You pulled slightly at your hair. “I'm sorry, I shouldn't have…”

“It's okay,” she said in a solemn voice, but with a small, resigned smile on her face.

“Why are you telling me this?” You finally faced her again.

“Because you can never take your family for granted. You shouldn’t say hurtful things to each other, and if it happens, you should let it cool off and then talk about it, not run away.”

Oh, now she was scolding you.

“I didn't–” you cringed. “Mike asked me to–”

She giggled. Giggled.

“I'm not saying it only because of you. Mike needs to understand that you're an adult now, that he won't always be able to protect you.”

Your eyes lit up. “Will you help me, then? Will you talk to him?”

Vanessa shook her head. “No, Y/N. You two need to sit down, talk, and finally start listening to each other.” She gave you a small smile.

You sighed, nodding. 

“Come on,” she said, standing up, shaking the dirt off her jeans, “I'll take you home.”

She extended her hand, and you took it without thinking twice.

Vanessa parked her car in front of your house, sighing softly before turning off the engine.

She looked at you, and after a few seconds, you met her gaze.

“You know,” she smiled, “I’m pretty sure you two can actually come to an agreement.”

You huffed, “That’s easier said than done.”

You pushed the car door open.

“Wait,” she said, holding onto the back of your jacket. You stayed still.

“I mean it, Y/N,” she gave you a soft look. 

“Just talk to him. No yelling, not arguing,” you resisted the urge to roll your eyes, “talk. Really talk…”

You stared at each other momentarily before she let go of your jacket.

“Hear him and… make him hear you,” Vanessa added, a whisper more than anything.

You nodded, climbing out of the car, and closing the door.

She lowered the window. “Good luck, I guess,” she smiled.

You felt your heart speed up. Was this really the end of it? Would she only speak to you when Mike asked her to? So she was just being nice, right?

You swallowed. “Yeah… Well.”

You felt heat rising up your neck, reaching your cheeks. Shame.

“Thanks for the ride, by the way,” you scratched the back of your neck, trying to get rid of the sensation.

“No problem.”

You nodded, and just as you were about to push the front door open, Vanessa called your name and you practically rushed to the car window. “Yes?”

Vanessa let out a breathy laugh and you almost melted on the spot. She opened the glove compartment and took out a notebook and a pen.

She started to write something down. 

“In case you and Mike keep having trouble…” She trailed off as she handed you the paper, which had a phone number written on it. 

You raised your gaze to meet hers. “If it doesn’t work out, you can call me and I can give you some advice,” she grinned at you. 

“And if it does?”

"Maybe we can go for a coffee, then?"

“I don’t like coffee,” you blurted out, feeling your cheeks warm up.

Vanessa's smile grew wider at your reaction and she chuckled softly. "Well, how about tea then? Or maybe we could just go for a walk instead?"

Her tone was playful and her smile was contagious, making it impossible for you to stay embarrassed for long.

You stayed silent, not sure how to respond. All you knew was that it was supposed to be cold outside at this time of the year, but you were sweating.

Vanessa shook her head, still smiling, and her playful tone turned into a sincere one. “We don’t have to if you don’t want–”

“I want to,” you interrupted her. “I do.”

She seemed to perk up. 

“I’ll call,” you said, without a doubt. “I promise.”

Vanessa gave you a soft smile before turning the car on, and slowly drive out of sight.

You sighed, turning to push the door open, and to your surprise, Mike was standing in the doorway with his arms crossed, and Abby peeking at you from behind him, smiling.

He met your gaze, and against all odds, he smiled at you. “I guess we need to talk.”

You smiled at him. “Yeah,” you looked down at the small piece of paper in your hands and swallowed. “Yeah. We do.”

Mike sighed, gesturing for you to come inside.

“So you heard all of that?” You said in a weary voice, and Abby giggled.

Mike shook his head. “Maybe we should eat first, I’m about to pass out.”

Right, you still hadn’t had dinner. Your stomach grumbled.

As you followed your brother into the dining room, you had the sensation that maybe, just maybe, things would be alright.

A/N: Reblogs are not only appreciated but also encouraged. Reblogs are what keep the fandom going.