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cripplecharacters · 6 months

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The Mask Trope, and Disfiguremisia in Media

[large text: The Mask Trope, and Disfiguremisia in Media]

If you followed this blog for more than like a week, you're probably familiar with “the mask trope” or at least with me complaining about it over and over in perpetuity. But why is it bad and why can't this dude shut up about it?

Let's start with who this trope applies to: characters with facial differences. There is some overlap with blind characters as well; think of the blindfold that is forced on a blind character for no reason. Here is a great explanation of it in this context by blindbeta. It's an excellent post in general, even if your character isn't blind or low vision you should read at least the last few paragraphs.

Here's a good ol’ tired link to what a facial difference is, but to put it simply:

If you have a character, who is a burn survivor or has scars, who wears a mask, this is exactly this trope.

The concept applies to other facial differences as well, but scars and burns are 99% of the representation and “representation” we get, so I'll be using these somewhat interchangeably here.

The mask can be exactly what you think, but it refers to any facial covering that doesn't have a medical purpose. So for example, a CPAP mask doesn't count for this trope, but a Magic Porcelain Mask absolutely does. Bandages do as well. If it covers the part of the face that is “different”, it can be a mask in the context used here.

Eye patches are on thin ice because while they do serve a medical purpose in real life, in 99.9% of media they are used for the same purpose as a mask. It's purely aesthetic.

With that out of the way, let's get into why this trope sucks and find its roots. Because every trope is just a symptom of something, really.

Roughly in order of the least to most important reasons...

Why It Sucks

[large text: Why It Sucks]

It's overdone. As in — boring. You made your character visibly different, and now they're no longer that. What is the point? Just don't give them the damn scar if you're going to hide it.

Zero connection with reality. No one does this. I don't even know how to elaborate on this. This doesn't represent anyone because no one does this.

Disability erasure. For the majority of characters with facial differences, their scars or burns somehow don't disable them physically, so the only thing left is the visible part… aaand the mask takes care of it too. Again, what's the point? If you want to make your disabled character abled, then just have them be abled. What is the point of "curing" them other than to make it completely pointless?

Making your readers with facial differences feel straight up bad. I'm gonna be honest! This hurts to see when it's all you get, over and over. Imagine there's this thing that everyone bullied you about, everyone still stares at, that is with you 24/7. Imagine you wanted to see something where people like you aren't treated like a freakshow. Somewhat unrealistic, but imagine that. That kind of world would only exist in fiction, right? So let's look into fiction- oh, none of the positive (or at least not "child-murderer evil") characters look like me. I mean they do, but they don't. They're forced to hide the one thing that connects us. I don't want to hide myself. I don't want to be told over and over that this is what people like me should do. That this is what other people expect so much that it's basically the default way a person with a facial difference can exist. I don't want this.

Perpetuating disfiguremisia.

"Quick" Disfiguremisia Talk

[large text: "Quick" Disfiguremisia Talk]

It's quick when compared to my average facial difference discussion post, bear with me please.

Disfiguremisia; portmanteau of disfigure from “disfigurement” and -misia, Greek for hatred.

Also known as discrimination of those mythical horrifically deformed people.

It shows up in fiction all the time; in-universe and in-narrative. Mask trope is one of the most common* representations of it, and it's also a trope that is gaining traction more and more, both in visual art and writing. This is a trope I particularly hate, because it's a blatant symptom of disfiguremisia. It's not hidden and it doesn't try to be. It's a painful remainder that I do not want nor need.

*most common is easily “evil disfigured villain”, just look at any horror media. But that's for another post, if ever.

When you put your character in a mask, it sends a clear message: in your story, facial differences aren't welcome. The world is hostile. Other characters are hostile. The author is, quite possibly, hostile. Maybe consciously, but almost always not, they just don't think that disfiguremisia means anything because it's the default setting. No one wants to see you because your face makes you gross and unsightly. If you have a burn; good luck, but we think you're too ugly to have a face. Have a scar? Too bad, now you don't. Get hidden.

Everything here is a decision that was made by the author. You are the one who makes the world. You are the person who decides if being disabled is acceptable or not there. The story doesn't have a mind of its own, you chose to make it disfiguremisic.

It doesn't have to be.

Questions to Ask Yourself

[large text: Questions to Ask Yourself]

Since I started talking about facial differences on this blog, I have noticed a very specific trend in how facial differences are treated when compared to other disabilities. A lot of writers and artists are interested in worldbuilding where accessibility is considered, where disabled people are accepted, where neurodivergence is seen as an important part of the human experience, not something “other”. This is amazing, genuinely.

Yet, absolutely no one seems to be interested in a world that is anything but cruel to facial differences. There's no escapist fantasies for us.

You see this over and over, at some point it feels like the same story with different names attached.

The only way a character with a facial difference can exist is to hide it. Otherwise, they are shamed by society. Seen as something gross. I noticed that it really doesn't matter who the character is, facial difference is this great equalizer. Both ancient deities and talking forest cats get treated as the same brand of disgusting thing as long as they're scarred, as long as they had something explode in their face, as long as they've been cursed. They can be accomplished, they can be a badass, they can be the leader of the world, they can kill a dragon, but they cannot, under any circumstances, be allowed to peacefully exist with a facial difference. They have to hide it in the literal sense, or be made to feel that they should. Constantly ashamed, embarrassed that they dare to have a face.

Question one to ask yourself: why is disfiguremisia a part of your story?

I'm part of a few minority groups. I'm an immigrant, I'm disabled, I'm queer. I get enough shit in real life for this so I like to take a break once in a while. I love stories where transphobia isn't a thing. Where xenophobia doesn't come up. But my whole life, I can't seem to find stories that don't spew out disfiguremisia in one way or the other at the first possible opportunity.

Why is disfiguremisia a default part of your worldbuilding? Why can't it be left out? Why in societies with scarred saviors and warriors is there such intense disgust for them? Why can't anyone even just question why this is the state of the world?

Why is disfiguremisia normal in your story?

Question two: do you know enough about disfiguremisia to write about it?

Ask yourself, really. Do you? Writers sometimes ask if or how to portray ableism when they themselves aren't disabled, but no one bothers to wonder if maybe they aren't knowledgeable enough to make half their story about their POV character experiencing disfiguremisia. How much do you know, and from where? Have you read Mikaela Moody or any other advocates’ work around disfiguremisia? Do you understand the way it intersects; with being a trans woman, with being Black? What is your education on this topic?

And for USAmericans... do you know what "Ugly Laws" are, and when they ended?

Question three: what does your story associate with facial difference — and why?

If I had to guess; “shame”, “embarrassment”, “violence”, "disgust", “intimidation”, “trauma”, “guilt”, “evil”, “curse”, “discomfort”, “fear”, or similar would show up.

Why doesn't it associate it with positive concepts? Why not “hope” or “love” or “pride” or “community”? Why not “soft” or “delicate”? Dare I say, “beauty” or “innocence”? Why not “blessing”? “Acceptance”?

Why not “normal”?

Question four: why did you make the character the way they are?

Have you considered that there are other things than “horrifically burned for some moral failing” or “most traumatic scenario put to paper”? Why is it always “a tough character with a history of violence” and never “a Disfigured princess”? Why not “a loving parent” or “a fashionable girl”, instead of “the most unkind person you ever met” and “total badass who doesn’t care about anything - other than how scary their facial difference is to these poor ableds”? Don’t endlessly associate us with brutality and suffering. We aren’t violent or manipulative or physically strong or brash or bloodthirsty by default. We can be soft, and frail and gentle and kind - and we can still be proud and unashamed.

Question five: why is your character just… fine with all this?

Can’t they make a community with other people with facial differences and do something about this? Demand the right to exist as disabled and not have to hide their literal face? Why are they cool with being dehumanized and treated with such hatred? Especially if they fall into the "not so soft and kind" category that I just talked about, it seems obvious to me that they would be incredibly and loudly pissed off about being discriminated against over and over... Why can't your character, who is a subject of disfiguremisia, realize that maybe it's disfiguremisia that's the problem, and try to fix it?

Question six: why is your character wearing a mask?

Usually, there's no reason. Most of the time the author hasn't considered that there even should be one, the character just wears a mask because that's what people with facial differences do in their mind. Most writers aren't interested in this kind of research or even considering it as a thing they should do. The community is unimportant to them, it's not like we are real people who read books. They think they understand, because to them it's not complex, it's not nuanced. It's ugly = bad. Why would you need a reason?

For cases where the reason is stated, I promise, I have heard of every single one. To quote, "to spare others from looking at them". I have read, "content warning: he has burn scars under the mask, he absolutely hates taking it off!", emphasis not mine. Because "he hates the way his skin looks", because "they care for their appearance a lot" (facial differences make you ugly, remember?). My favorite: "only has scars and the mask when he's a villain, not as a hero", just to subtly drive the point home. This isn't the extreme end of the spectrum. Now, imagine being a reader with a facial difference. This is your representation, sitting next to Freddy Krueger and Voldemort.

How do you feel?

F.A.Q. [frequently asked questions]

[large text: F.A.Q. [frequently asked questions]]

As in, answers and “answers” to common arguments or concerns.

“Actually they want to hide their facial difference” - your character doesn’t have free will. You want them to hide it. Again; why.

“They are hiding it to be more inconspicuous!” - I get that there are elves in their world, but there’s no universe where wearing a mask with eye cutouts on the street is less noticeable than having a scar. Facial differences aren’t open wounds sprinkling with blood, in case that's not clear.

“It’s for other people's comfort” - why are other characters disfiguremisic to this extent? Are they forcing all minorities to stay hidden and out of sight too? That’s a horrible society to exist in.

“They are wearing it for Actual Practical Reason” - cool! I hope that this means you have other characters with facial differences that don’t wear it for any reason.

"It's the character's artistic expression" - I sure hope that there are abled characters with the same kind of expression then.

“They’re ashamed of their face” - and they never have any character development that would make that go away? That's just bad writing. Why are they ashamed in the first place? Why is shame the default stance to have about your own face in your story? I get that you think we should be ashamed and do these ridiculous things, but in real life we just live with it.

"Now that you say that it is kinda messed up but I'm too far into the story please help" - here you go.

“[some variation of My Character is evil so it's fine/a killer so it fits/just too disgusting to show their disability” - this is the one of the only cases where I’m fine with disability erasure, actually. Please don’t make them have a facial difference. This is the type of harm that real life activists spend years and decades undoing. Disfiguremisia from horror movies released in the 70s is still relevant. It still affects people today.

"But [in-universe explanation why disfiguremisia is cool and fine actually]" - this changes nothing.

Closing Remarks

[large text: Closing Remarks]

I hope that this post explains my thoughts on facial difference representation better. It's a complicated topic, I get it. I'm also aware that this post might come off as harsh (?) but disfiguremisia shouldn't be treated lightly, it shouldn't be a prop. It's real world discrimination with a big chunk of its origins coming out of popular media.

With the asks that have been sent regarding facial differences, I realized that I probably haven't explained what the actual problems are well enough. It's not about some technical definition, or about weird in-universe explanations. It's about categorizing us as some apparently fundamentally different entity that can't possibly be kind and happy, about disfiguremisia so ingrained into our culture that it's apparently impossible to make a world without it; discrimination so deep that it can't be excised, only worked around. But you can get rid of it. You can just not have it there in the first place. Disfiguremisia isn't a fundamental part of how the world works; getting rid of it won't cause it to collapse. Don't portray discrimination as an integral, unquestionable part of the world that has to stay no matter what; whether it's ableism, transphobia, or Islamophobia or anything else. A world without discrimination can exist. If you can't imagine a world without disfiguremisia in fiction... that's bad. Sad, mostly. To me, at least.

Remember, that your readers aren't going to look at Character with a Scar #14673 and think "now I'm going to research how real life people with facial differences live." They won't, there's no inclination for them to do so. If you don't give them a reason, they won't magically start thinking critically about facial differences and disfiguremisia. People like their biases and they like to think that they understand.

And, even if you're explaining it over and over ;-) (winky face) there will still be people who are going to be actively resistant to giving a shit. To try and get the ones who are capable of caring about us, you, as the author, need to first understand disfiguremisia, study Face Equality, think of me as a human being with human emotions who doesn't want to see people like me treated like garbage in every piece of media I look at. There's a place and time for that media, and if you don't actually understand disfiguremisia, you will only perpetuate it; not "subvert" it, not "comment" on it.

I hope this helps :-) (smile emoji. for good measure)

Mod Sasza

#mod sasza #disfiguremisia #face difference #mask trope #writing trope #writing resource #writing reference #writing resources #writing advice #writeblr #writing tips #long post #burn survivor representation

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chaosandmarigolds · 15 days

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EMS AU THINGYYYYYYY 🚑🚑

(lets be honest i have no idea what part im on)

It was a typical day at the base, with soldiers coming and going, and you were in the supply room trying to locate some elusive medical supplies. As you rummaged through a particularly cluttered shelf, a mindless distraction you had put upon yourself, you heard a voice from behind you.

“Hey, doc! You seen the new med kits for the flighters?"”

You turned to see Sergeant Barnes, a gruff but generally friendly man known for his no-nonsense attitude. He had a reputation for being blunt, like someone else who currently occupied 99% percent of your thoughts so you stammered for an answer as the words processed.

“Oh! The ones with the oxygen, that's right, I just put the order in so-” you began.

Barnes cut you off with a chuckle. “Yeah, I actually didn't care- So, you and Ghost, huh?”

You froze, what the fuck did he mean by that? Who else knew of that. “Sorry," you break your continuous breath holding with a panicked laugh, "Sorry, what?”

Barnes leaned casually against the doorframe, clearly enjoying your confusion. “The whole base is talking about you and Ghost. Apparently, you two had quite the night.”

You blinked, trying to piece together what he was saying, if it wasn't for the tears that were threatening your eyes (which you had to admit was a more pathetic than you cared to admit) you would see him look oh so smug. “I’m afraid...I-I don't follow.”

Barnes grinned. “You don’t know? People are saying you and L.T> Riley are more than just colleagues. Got everyone’s tongues wagging.”

You wanted to puke. He had assured you nothing had happened!! He swore on it! Or .. you would assume he would've sworn on it if you happened to ask him.

Before you could respond, the door to the supply room swung open, and Johnny walked in, looking for something—or perhaps someone. When he saw you standing there with a bewildered expression, his eyes lit up.

“Oi, what’s all this then?” Johnny asked, noticing Barnes’s grin.

Barnes raised an eyebrow, clearly enjoying the timing. “Just filling the doc in on the latest rumor.”

Johnny’s face lit up with recognition, and he turned to you, eyes wide with a mix of amusement and sympathy, "Ah, one of the rookies heard me n Gaz talkin in the galley, lass-"

You started at him, exasperated. "And you were saying-you were saying the lieutenant and I had sex??"

“Welcome to base life,” Johnny said, his grin widening. “Chit-chat here spread faster than the common cold...Anyway, wanna ask you if yer doin alright?”

"Per the request of the big man. " Barns chipped in with a cheeky smile.

Johnny scoffed, "Nonae bee-wax, is it?" A pause, "But yes."

You shook your head, trying to process the absurdity, you had just gotten this position and the idea of your trying to sleep your way through probation was disgusting. So his words went through your head. “ We didn't have sex! I would... I just had a bit too much to drink, and he helped me get back to my- his room. That’s all.”

Johnny stared at you, seeming to be a bit taken back by your ramble, "Right-O, uh... You need ta sit?"

"No I'm fine, the...the med kits," you force the words out, looking to Barns, "I should have them ready within the week."

The man took that as a reasonable answer and left with a shrug, Johnny turned to you with a sympathetic look. “Sorry about that. I didn’t think the gossip would spread so quickly. But, if it helps, the whole thing should blow over soon enough.”

You nodded, looking to him, "Right...and why are you here again?”

A short moment passed before he spoke again, "Simon wanna me to check in on you?"

"If he is oh-so-concerned he can talk to my fucking face like a man." You snap back, you take a breath, "Sorry, I'm sorry, this is the tenth time someone has come to me and spoken about this stupid- stupid!-"

"Gossip?"

"Shut up." You huff, "Tell him I'm fine."

"you don't look fine." Johnny spoke quietly, when he saw you look back to him he relented, "You're perfect!! wonderful even! Reporting that back."

"Hold on-" Mary's laughter rung through the phone, "Wait what the fuck!? You, sweet little ol you, FUCKED the masked freakazoid?? Girl-"

"No!" You cry out from where you had buried your face into the pillow, "We didn't! i got drunk and he helped me and the next thing I know is that i'm in his room and in his clothes and I walk out and I feel so...UGH"

Mary laughs for what you thought was a solid minute, "Jesus, so...did you...ya know?"

"No!! For the millionth time. I swear if I hear the S word one more time I will throw myself off a cliff."

"Right, well, it'll blow over. everyone will go to pick on the new topic in like...five hours."

You turn your face to stare at the wall, the screen of your phone lighting up the ceiling, "this sucks."

"Eh, it sucks more when you don't have the scary man obsessed with you." "EXCUSE ME-" "Oh wow look at the time! Gotta go!"

"She alright?"

Johnny winced to the first question that came out of Simons mouth and he shrugs, the words not quite forming, "She...She alive, al'igh." The silence was deafening, sure he knew his friend was generally apathetic and somewhat cruel at times but in the same way he had found Simon cared for him he also, somehow, cared for you.

So he sits down on the egde of the building and shrugs, "As long as she ain't the one keepin ya alive I feel like your safe."

Simon nodded, "I'll go have a chat."

" HORRIBLE IDEA?????"

_--

Am I aware I have little zero idea where I left off in this series, yes. But I vaguely remember and I'm lazy so here you go!!

#cod x you #simon riley fanfic #simon ghost riley #simon ghost x reader #cod fluff #simon riley x you #simon riley imagine #simon riley x reader #simon ghost riley x reader #coco's chaos <3

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moonstrider9904 · 6 months

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Don't Blame Me

This one shot is for the Bad Batch Prompt event using the prompt:

“Fuck you.”

“Fuck me yourself, you coward.”

Pairing: Crosshair x Fem!Reader

Tags: 18+ strictly. Minors should not interact with this or any of my writing pieces as they are content for adults only. Smut, sexual tension, foul language and swearing, oral (female receiving) sex, unprotected vaginal sex, creampie, flirting.

Playlist: Don't Blame Me by Taylor Swift

@arctrooper69 Tagging you right here :D

A night like that one was much too rare. The sun had just finished going down beneath the horizon, and the faintest hue of blue still lit the sky while the stars had already begun their nightly dance. The breeze was warm on your skin, even with the drops of water that lingered on you as you sat at the edge of the pool with your feet and calves still in the water, your hands running down your wet hair as you sighed and took in the life of the moment. The speakers played chill tunes, easy to listen to, perfect to vibe with the summery air and the laughs coming from all around the pool.

You looked around and smiled at the fact that all of your favorite troopers were there, and even some you hadn’t seen before—probably shinies who had just joined their platoons. Boys from the 501st, 212th, hell, even the 99s had bothered to come to a summer pool night on Naboo for their shore leave.

You couldn't help but laugh and think you’d seen it all when, across the pool, you saw that silver-haired sniper taking a sip from a bright cocktail. And his eyes were on you too, glaring, but you were used to that. You shot a cheeky grin at Crosshair only for him to roll his eyes and look away.

Your gaze remained on him for a little longer until you heard somebody diving into the pool, and when you looked at the crystalline water lit by the warm bulbs submerged in it, you quickly realized it was Fives as he emerged from under the water running his hands up his face and towards the back of his head, brushing the hair away. In that pose, Fives opened his arms and flexed, showing off his biceps as he shot you his signature charming grin, winking at you.

“These babies have gotten bigger since the last time I saw you, sweetheart,” Fives beamed.

Laughter escaped you—as much as you adored Fives, his attempts at flirting were always a sight to behold. Something about young, handsome soldiers tripping over their feet for your attention made you wish all summer nights were like that one, and to follow along with Fives’ game, you crossed one leg over the other, planted your hands firmly on the ground at your sides and shrugged, pursing your lips together.

“I don’t know, they kinda look the same to me,” you teased him.

“Don’t listen to him,” you heard the voice next to you as Jesse took a seat beside you only to fully get into the pool and swim over next to Fives, adopting his same pose. “I actually think I pull it off better, and I only lift half as often as he does. It’s like I don’t even have to try.”

“Oh, shut up!” Fives yelled, grinning mischievously as he brushed his hand and forearm over the water’s surface in Jesse’s direction, splashing him.

“That’s how you wanna do it, you runt?” Jesse played along and began splashing back.

As if that gesture were a galactic beckoning for the clones, the pool almost instantly became filled with troopers wanting to partake in the splash battle. You giggled as you watched them splash and wrestle playfully—the scene in front of you was probably the best definition of “boys being boys.” You loved it, and laughter wouldn’t stop leaving you. For the duration of that night, you hadn’t enjoyed anything more than what was currently playing out in front of you.

However, across the pool, the same pair of piercing amber eyes glared past the scene and into you, but you weren’t taking notice of that anymore.

It only took a few seconds for the clones’ splash war to no longer be about you, and the water flying in from multiple directions was beginning to get out of hand. Wiping a couple of drops that had fallen near your eyes, you got up and made your way towards the chair where you’d left your things. You slipped your feet into your sandals, smiling at the sound of the racket behind you blending with the music, and then you took the cream-colored shawl you’d taken to the party and wrapped it around your hips in a makeshift skirt. You were in the mood for a drink now, but while the water wars ended, you figured you’d hit the powder room to adjust your suit.

Crosshair watched you from where he stood, his eyes following your silhouette as you walked from the pool to the lounge. Every time your right leg came forward, your skin was exposed by the edges of the fabric wrapped around your hips, offering him a teasing glimpse of your thigh. He picked up on the sway of your hips, the delicate left and right of every step that you took, partnered perfectly with your hands coming back and forth in tandem with your stride. As you walked past the chairs and the tables, Crosshair took in how gracefully your hair framed your face, as well as how perfectly the top of your bathing suit framed your breasts and the top half of your belly, letting him see the skin just above your belly button only for the smoothness to stop just above your womb, where the shawl began.

Fuck. He suppressed a groan. Did you even have any idea how sensual you looked? Clearly you didn’t, why else would you waste yourself on all those amateurs trying to impress you with a basic flex and a splish-splash of water?

You’d made it to the common mirror just outside the restrooms and looked at your reflection in the flattering warm lighting. You combed through your hair using your fingers, trying to achieve a carefree look, a blend between messy and done that seemed right for the night. When you were done with that, you eased a few creases on the fabric of your shawl and tightened the knot—you didn’t want that getting loose on accident—and you smoothed out the top of your bathing suit as well. Once you were ready to head back out into the party, you turned around and began making your way where you came from. Your thoughts on what cocktail you were gonna get were interrupted by a tall, lean silhouette dressed in black coming into view. The sight of those amber eyes made you stop in your tracks, and you couldn’t help the little grin that appeared on your lips.

“Look who finally decided to socialize,” you teased him.

Crosshair scoffed, his eyes looking aside as he did. “Don’t flatter yourself. I wouldn’t waste my time or energy with you.”

You placed your hands over your heart, faking a heartache. “Must you hurt me so?”

“I’m not particularly happy with you,” Crosshair crooned.

You giggled. “You’re never happy with anyone. And you of all people have no reason to hold anything against me, you never even let yourself open up to me.” Your gaze softened and you took a step towards him, holding your fists behind your back and pouting up at him. “Why won’t you let me in, Crosshair?”

Again, he rolled his eyes. “I didn’t come here for this.”

“Something tells me you did,” you answered. “Here I am, what do you want with me?”

“Nothing,” Crosshair nearly spat the word out.

You raised a brow. No one in that party could deny how insightful you were, not even him.

Crosshair scoffed again. “Fine, I’ll bite.”

“Please do,” you couldn’t resist the urge to say.

“Maybe I didn’t like the way the others were making fools out of themselves for your attention,” Crosshair glared. “It was pathetic to watch.”

“Ah,” you crossed your arms, nodding slowly. “So you’re jealous.”

“Fuck, no,” Crosshair smirked. “I just wouldn’t be caught dead being a complete idiot like that.”

“So you aren’t jealous?” You smirked back.

“No.”

“Then why do you look like you’re about to stab someone?” Your smirk widened.

You’d cornered him, and Crosshair hated that. He was used to always having the upper hand, the higher ground, to being on top of everything. Nothing could ever surprise him, and when it did, it only meant he’d screwed up. The fact that you had just done that in the most leisurely of settings made him want to puke.

“Forget this,” he said, his silhouette beginning to turn around.

“I didn’t take you for the type to run away, Crosshair,” you said as your hands went over to your hips and you shifted your weight onto your left side, emphasizing the curves of your silhouette.

Crosshair faced you again, his gaze darkening at the little pose you’d adopted. You noticed his eyes running down your body, but when they met yours again, his gaze hardened.

“Fuck you,” he said, without hesitating.

You scoffed, looking at him from head to toe as well. “Fuck me yourself, you coward. I’d like to see if you can.”

He scoffed, his thin lips curving into a smile as he made his way towards you painfully slowly. Hovering in front of you, he took his fingers up to your chin, tilting your face up, making your breath hitch despite your witty exterior.

“You better be damn serious about that, doll,” Crosshair purred with hungry eyes.

“What, did I stutter?” Your breath shook as you whispered, and your hand snaked up his abdomen and felt his chest over the black shirt he wore. “What other way do I have to tell you I want this?”

The hand that was on your chin traveled back and down to cup the side of your neck, firm, but never hard enough to hurt you. Crosshair’s fingertips rested gently on your nape, and his other hand went up and joined the first in perfect symmetry. He pressed his body closer to yours, never breaking eye contact with you, and your heart beat so fast you were afraid he’d be able to hear it through your chest. He was devastatingly handsome, looming over you, watching you with lustful eyes foreboding passion. It didn’t matter where you were. It didn’t matter if there were people outside—they were enjoying their own night, they didn’t have to be involved in what only concerned you and Crosshair. All that mattered was the sensation of his hands on your skin, your hands over his chest, and the heat beginning to boil low in your stomach.

You half-expected another snarky remark, another sneer coming from Crosshair just to test the waters, but you basked in the mercy of the satisfaction that came when Crosshair finally crashed his lips down on yours. He stepped towards you and you stepped backwards, stumbling into the bathroom for him to lock the door behind him when you were both already inside. The music continued to boom from the party outside, as did the cheers and the laughter from everyone blissfully ignorant of the fire catching between you and the marksman. You didn’t have to worry about being heard.

You blindly walked backwards with your fists tugging at Crosshair’s shirt, your mind swarming with the concept of him as he devoured your lips with luscious kisses and mischievous nibbles. You felt your back bump into the wall next to the sink, and he pressed you onto it, letting you feel the erection growing under his pitch-black boxer bathing suit. You whimpered at the hardness and let your hands travel up his chest and around his shoulders until the tips of your fingers found his silver hair, which you twirled and tugged hoping to get a sound from him. Crosshair pleased you by letting out a low grunt and grew more passionate with every tug you gave to his hair.

One of the hands that was on your neck traveled down to your waist and kneaded your flesh with his fingertips, freeing your neck for him to take his kisses down to that sensitive skin he so badly wanted to mark. You shuddered when you first felt Crosshair suck on your neck, and you were astounded at his ease to find your sweetest spot. He nibbled and sucked such that you were certain there would be a maroon mark on your skin, and you enjoyed every second of it. You were enjoying the idea of coming out of that bathroom with that mark on your neck for everyone to see, and something told you Crosshair would get a kick of it as well, parading you in front of everyone else to show them how it’s really done.

When he was finished with your neck, Crosshair moved down your body leaving a trail of kisses and nibbles whilst feeling every inch of your body he could, including your hardened nipples over the fabric of your swimsuit, until he was on his knees in front of you. His hands greedily squeezed the flesh of your buttcheeks as he focused his kisses on your lower abdomen, just above the line where your shawl and the bottom of your bathing suit began. Unwilling to wait much longer to finally taste you, Crosshair curled his fingers around your bathing panties and pulled them down your legs with ease. You stepped out of them for him to hand them to you for you to hold in one hand, and when your other hand went to undo your top, he was quick to stop you.

“No, doll,” Crosshair purred. “You’re keepin’ that on.”

You giggled at him in response, and by his actions, he didn’t intend for you to remove that shawl either. Part of you would have preferred for Crosshair to have already been shirtless at this point, but any sort of thought faded when Crosshair took one of your legs and wrapped it around his back—it was only until then you became aware that your aching cunt was finally exposed to him.

Crosshair split the fabric of your shawl and placed it over your hips to keep it out of the way; he held your butt with one hand to keep you steady while he used his index and thumb fingers on his other hand to lift the hood of your clit. Your mind barely had a second to ponder on the fact that he knew what he was doing, and when you felt his tongue begin to brush over the pearl of your clit, your whole world faded. A deep moan escaped you, and your head fell back to the wall as your chest heaved at every sensation Crosshair gifted you with. You slipped farther from sanity and nearer into bliss, feeling he’d tip you over the edge in an obscenely small amount of time.

Switching between luscious kissing and precise sucking, Crosshair turned you from confident temptress to whimpering mess, pleased at the idea of having you at his mercy. Your moans grew louder and more desperate, and your hand reached down to find his hair again, twirling and tugging at his beautiful silver locks. You drew a moan from Crosshair, and its vibrations resonated deep within your flesh, finally finishing you off. Your already helpless moaning turned into pleading mewls as the pleasure that focused on your clit exploded into beautiful flames invading every corner of your body. Your muscles tensed as you squirmed, knowing it was only Crosshair’s grip keeping you upright. You were oblivious to the amount of times you whimpered his name, you only had the headspace to rut your hips against him, as if you weren’t feeling enough mind-erasing pleasure already.

You wanted more. You wanted his fullness, his touch. You wanted him.

Crosshair emerged from between your legs as if he were coming up for air after a long swim. You were dazzled, panting in the aftermath of every wave of pleasure you’d just felt, but you managed to look down and see him smirking proudly. Crosshair grunted as he stood up, towering over you again, and just when you were beginning to make sense of the world around you again, you saw him pulling down his bathing shorts to reveal a long, hard erection waiting just for you.

You couldn’t help but moan at the sight, making him chuckle with pride.

“Got room for some more?” Crosshair asked.

You nodded frantically, and without hesitation, Crosshair firmly grasped your ass and lifted you, resting part of your weight on the sink beside you. You clung to him, needily wrapping your legs around his waist, and he could only hum at the sight, pleased. After the painful wait, you finally felt Crosshair sliding himself into you, hissing at the initial stretch of your flesh only for you to moan when it became the most incredible sensation you’d ever experienced.

And Crosshair took it from there. Holding you firmly, he took care of every movement. Your arousal made it easier for him to slip in and out of you at whatever speed he desired, and you could tell he wasn’t planning on putting anything off. He was quick, accurate, decisive, grunting low and seductive into your ear with every few thrusts into your hips. Your nails clawed into his upper back, moaning deeply as you tightened your legs around him as much as you could, and it heightened the sensations you felt.

As he continued to fuck deep into you, Crosshair made eye contact with you for a moment, his cocky exterior suddenly becoming caring, even soft. The thought of your prior conversation entered your mind—how long had he felt that way for you? How long had you been suppressing your own desires for him?

Now that you were in his arms, feeling all the pleasure he could give you, you were certain you were where you needed to be.

A tender moan of his name escaped you just before you felt the pleasure expand through your body again. The moans induced by this second orgasm were far louder and embarrassingly more lustful than those of the first, and Crosshair thrust his hips faster into you as he fisted your hair and gave it a light tug. Your vision went white as you succumbed to the pleasure, to him, until you felt the heat of his release inside you followed by soft, low-pitched moans that sealed every one of your feelings for him.

Carefully, he set you down, and once he was sure that your feet were firm on the ground, Crosshair went limp in front of you. His arms were the only thing that remained strong as he caged you to the wall, panting to recover his breath in tandem with you. His lips were close to yours, and you couldn’t help but reach your hands up to cup his face and kiss him gently. Crosshair kissed you back without a hesitation, retrieving his hands from the wall to place them over your wrists, pressing you deeper to him.

“You never had to be jealous, Crosshair,” you whispered.

“Don’t blame me,” he panted, “for getting a little unhinged at the thought of someone else trying to satisfy you.”

“Hey, if this is the result, I’ll take it any day,” you winked. “I should have known a tease and a challenge was all it took.”

Crosshair smirked at you and let his hands travel down to your waist, straightening his back and lifting your feet up with him. “Wanna show off your hickey?”

You felt the heat rush to your cheeks. “You’d love that, wouldn’t you?”

Crosshair chuckled and pecked your lips, setting you down on the floor again and pulling up his bathing suit again. “Come.”

You put the bottom of your bathing suit on and followed him out of the refresher with your arm linked in his, ready for all the stares you were about to receive. Crosshair would definitely show them all, and you never would have fathomed the idea of parading a fresh hickey in front of a group of men who were flirting with you minutes earlier, but if that love hadn’t made you a bit crazy, you wouldn’t have been doing it right.

#tbbpromptevent #moonstrider writes #tbb x reader #crosshair x reader #tbb crosshair x reader #tbb crosshair smut #tbb smut #tbb fanfic #the bad batch fanfic

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genericpuff · 4 months

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(You can delete this ask if it makes you uncomfortable) Do you think I should give up on my dream of being a webcomic artist? It's been what I'd been wanting to for years yet from what I'm hearing, it's hard to get money and an audience and that the mainstream webcomic hosting platforms don't treat their creators well. It doesn't help that while my art is decent, I don't really know how to create webcomics beyond like really short 4-5 panel comics even though I'd been drawing for many years. There's also the issue of my ADHD making it difficult to commit to stuff but then again at least that can be hopefully fixed once I get medicated. So, now the career of a webcomic artist sounds like a pipe dream at best. Is it worth pursuing, even if I don't make much money with it?

"Do you think I should give up on my dream of being a webcomic artist?"

And this isn't just for you, anon, this is for everyone who follows my nonsense here.

Yes, it's hard to build an audience.

It's even harder to make money.

You should still make webcomics if you really want to do it.

The only practical piece of advice I can give you from the perspective of someone who's been doing this for years is to manage your expectations. Because that's the biggest mistake a lot of webcomic artists make (and I too, made this mistake) they go into it setting the bar that it HAS to result in them making a living off it, getting famous off it, etc. when that's unfortunately only the reality for the 1% who get lucky or have an advantage that the other 99% don't have. And then, of course, failing to meet those ridiculously high expectations makes the fall hurt that much harder if you fail, especially with odds like that stacked against you. That's not to say you shouldn't set a bar for yourself, but you have to set it in a place that's reasonable. Especially if you're an artist with ADHD (same, mood), we have a REAL bad habit of setting the bar unreasonably high for ourselves when we're still learning and getting our feet wet (it's why we're always taking on new hobbies after getting inspired by musicians or crafters and then getting immediately discouraged when we're not suddenly able to do the thing with that same amount of skill).

Set the bar in a reasonable place with reasonable expectations, and then when you MEET that bar, you'll have even more motivation and confidence to aim higher. What won't give you confidence is setting the bar alongside the pros who have been at this for years, because not only will it take way too long to hit that for you to see results, you might give up before you even come close because of how far away the bar is.

A career as a webcomic artist is about as guaranteed as making a career out of Youtube. But being a webcomic artist, period? You can do it. Anyone can do it. I'm still doing it in spite of everything. Like, I cannot even fully express to you just how much of what I do here is the culmination of a long list of failures. My art, my writing, the stuff I do here is built on the corpses of my failures. But those failures were still important, they had to happen to make me into the person and artist I am today. That person is STILL making mistakes, and that artist is STILL not rich LOL Failure is scary, but fear of failure is the true killer of joy and growth.

Do not tie the merit of being a webcomic artist to how much money you can (or can't) make out of it. Just like with starting a Youtube channel, you shouldn't go into it expecting money and fame right out the gate, but there are equal amounts of joy and experience you can gain by doing it. There's a reason people say you have to do it out of love and passion first because ultimately that's all you'll have to keep carrying you through if and when you fail to meet your goals. You don't have to be sure if you'll still want to do it a year from now or five years from now, none of that matters. If you want to do it now, then do it.

Make your 4-5 panel comics if that's what you enjoy doing. Make whatever tickles your fancy. Acknowledge your fears and doubts, thank them for their opinion, and do it anyways. "What if it ends up being a waste of time?" The time will pass anyways. Worst case, at least you'll be able to say you did it. That's better than never trying and regretting it in the end.

#ask me anything #ama #anon ama #anon ask me anything

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kurogane2512 · 6 months

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Haloo, Can I get a ninety nine x FEM reader(chief) from ptn? The plot It's like ninety nine found out that some of the sinners are doing seggs with chief and somehow she was curious what chief's face would look like and how she mø@ns so she decided to sneak out of her cell one night and went to chief's office

This was funny and hot to write at the same time and I was confused whether to make it NSFW or not. Also, 99 deserves more content too man I want to see her in lighthearted events and how she's doing after her interro

18+ CONTENT

Game: Path to Nowhere

Characters: Ninety-Nine x fem!reader (Chief)

Type: Smut with plot

The MBCC Cafeteria was buzzing with noise and activity as it was time for dinner, the Sinners assembled and took their seats after a tiring training regime and were already pleasantly digging in their food. Ninety-Nine was seated with Hella and silently ate her portion while Hella chatted away with EMP and others, that's when Ninety-Nine overheard some Sinners on the table beside her talk about a strange topic.

"Hey, who's going to accompany Chief tonight? Yesterday the Countess went, right?" it was Bai Yi who spoke.

"I believe it's your turn tonight, Ms Bai Yi. Unless you are interested to switch?~" a red-haired woman spoke, Ninety-Nine remembered her name was Cabernet.

"Hey, don't take my chance so easily! I have been waiting for so long~"

"So have we all, Ms Bai Yi. Chief had been busy for weeks and we had to stop this.... routine of ours~" the psychologist, Chameleon answered now.

"It was a shame, truly. We should help Chief relax now that she has time again~" Cabernet replied.

Curiosity took over Ninety-Nine as she heard more of the conversation, wondering what this 'routine' was. All of a sudden, Langley walked in near that table and sat down.

"Apologies, Bai Yi. But you'll have to give Chief to me tonight, I have important work to discuss." Langley said.

"That's not fair! I demand compensation for this!" Bai Yi roused, making Langley smirk.

"Oh, don't worry. You'll be given your due rewards~"

Bai Yi hummed in annoyance and accepted the deal. Now Ninety-Nine was even more curious, what was this routine that even Langley, the leader of the 9th Agency, was involved in? After dinner, Ninety-Nine discreetly made her way to your office and as expected, she found Langley inside. She couldn't hear nor see much from the glass opening on the door, but the sight in front caught her by surprise. Langley was all over you, roughly kissing you while pinning you on your table followed by pulling you to the couch and straddling you.

Ninety-Nine leaned in and wished to see better, but the couch was too far away from her view now and all she could see was your legs lying on Langley's shoulders while she rocked her body. She could hear faint sounds of moaning and whimpering and she was sure it was your voice. Ninety-Nine didn't know what to do, it felt like a crime standing there and watching this act unfold. Her body moved on its own and she practically ran back to her cell.

"That was.... the Chief does these things with other Sinners here? Has she also tried with Hella... No, that can't be. Hella would never accept, and I know Chief isn't that kind of person either. Not to mention, it looked like that other woman initiated it first. Everyone else also spoke of it as if they enjoyed it a lot...."

Ninety-Nine felt her body become warmer, her temperature rising unusually as the images of you moaning in pleasure ran through her mind. She pictured how your face may look, and she didn't realize how much she wanted to see you that way now. From then on, she regularly snuck to your office at the same hour and watched a different Sinner come in and have their fun.

She was surprised how many Sinners did this with you, and it looked like all of them had a good time for which they kept coming back. Their conversations during dinnertime also became more vivid and clear as they discussed specific actions they did with you, praising and fawning over your adorable reactions and surprising dominant moments. Ninety-Nine couldn't hold back anymore.

This time, she came to your office before anyone else could.

"Chief, do you have a minute?"

The familiar voice surprised you, "Ah, Ninety-Nine? Is everything okay?"

"Yes, I had... a question."

"Oh okay, sure. Ask away."

"What do you do every night with other Sinners?" Ninety-Nine asked with no hesitation at all, you almost choked on your coffee at her directness.

"W-What do you mean I do with other Sinners?!"

"I heard them talk about you at the cafeteria... and I have been watching you for a few days. Since when did you have this arrangement with them?"

Your face flushed at her statements, they talk about you and Ninety Nine has been spying on you? You wanted to hide in a corner now.

"I-I... I just do it for their own good. Some of them have certain... urges, and I fulfill them." you replied while looking away. Ninety-Nine hummed then stepped closer to you and forcefully pinned you to the wall.

"Do it with me too then." Ninety-Nine's statement came out as a command, an order. Her scarlet eyes gazed into your soul with determination, you knew she was absolutely serious.

"W-Wait, why? Are you having some problems in your body? I will have you treated the correct way, you shouldn't do this just because of others...."

"No... it's not that. I have never experienced such things, I don't know how it feels. But when I heard them talk about you, and heard your voice myself... I wanted it more. I wanted to see you in that state and hear you properly."

Your face flushed in embarrassment, was she talking about hearing you moan? You felt you had no choice. You never expected to do this with Ninety-Nine of all people, but somehow you were drawn to her and wanted to see how she is in that state. You finally agreed and like an animal in heat, Ninety-Nine lunged forward to press her lips to yours. Her movements were rough and erratic, she really had no idea what she was doing but she wanted to devour you.

"Wait wait, Ninety-Nine, slow down...!" you tried to speak in between the kiss and Ninety-Nine stopped in confusion.

"Is this not the way? I saw them do this every time before starting."

"N-No, you aren't wrong but you don't have to be so quick. You first have to set the mood a little and take it easy, shall I show you?"

"....Okay."

Ninety-Nine was calm but you could tell she was slightly nervous too, perhaps even intrigued. You smiled at her then guided her by her wrist to the couch and seated her beside yourself. She looked at you and waited for you to move and do something. You looked at her all over and suddenly felt nervous yourself, you had had sex with so many different people with different experiences but somehow initiating things yourself with someone like Ninety-Nine was challenging.

"Chief, what do I need to do?" Ninety-Nine questioned with sincerity, you could tell she really wanted this. You sighed then shifted closer and gently held her shoulders then leaned forward, slowly and steadily kissing her lips. She had the urge to kiss back roughly just like before but she held back and let you guide her. Your lips were soft to touch and pleasant to feel, she didn't realize how much she wanted this warmness more.

You tilted your head and kissed her deeper, swiping your tongue across her lips and on instinct, she parted her mouth slightly and you took the opportunity to go in. You moved your tongue with hers and passionately kissed her, Ninety-Nine was taken aback by the intimacy. Her body temperature rose like never before, it wasn't anger that was fueling her but something completely different.

"....Mmh~" Ninety-Nine moaned when you pulled back from the kiss, slightly panting as you gazed at her.

"H-How was it...?" you asked.

"....Not bad, I can see what you mean."

You smiled then trailed your gaze over her neck and chest, feeling aroused looking at her exposed skin.

"Do we remove our clothes now?"

"Ah, do you want to continue to that....?"

"Of course, that's what I want."

You nodded then slowly moved your arms around her and removed her top to expose her breasts. She did the same to you and removed your shirt, intently gazing at your naked form which made you slightly embarrassed. Her eyes trailed towards your pants and her hands were already on the move to discard them.

"I want to do what they do with you, Chief."

"....Everyone does different things, they all have different desires and way of doing it. You shouldn't want to follow them. Tell me, what do you want, Ninety-Nine?"

Ninety-Nine was at a loss of words for a while as she pondered deeply then finally spoke, "I.... I want to see you and hear you. I don't know how to do that but.... that's what I want."

"Alright then, is there something your body is telling you to do? Some kind of urge you are getting?"

"I...." Ninety-Nine was breathing hard and gazing at you. As if being controlled by her urges, she pounced on you and pushed you down on the couch then straddled your lap.

"This... I want to do this."

You blushed then cupped her face and pulled her down into a passionate kiss once again. Ninety-Nine was more confident now, her tongue moving impatiently to taste you. Her knee dug into your core making you moan into the kiss, and she only wanted to hear that more. She released the kiss and sat up on your lap then brushed her hand across your core, dipping it past your pants and touching your clit.

You softly gasped and squeezed your thighs together but Ninety-Nine was quick to shove them apart followed by taking off your pants and underwear completely. She looked at your throbbing wet core and felt arousal rising in her own body, her eyes intensely gleaming at the sight.

"I know I have to do it here. But tell me how to."

You nodded and she extended her hand towards your folds, slowly and gently rubbing her fingers on them. She was too focused on how her fingers moved, scared to unintentionally hurt you. Your softly moaned at her ministrations, your sounds making her more eager and she looked up to see you being all hot and aroused.

"Hah.... you are doing it right. Just... try moving here now, mhm~" You guided her hand towards your clit and she grasped the bud then lightly squeezed it, earning a whimper from you.

"Ngh~ Yes.... just.... rub and circle it.... aah.... slowly and easily...."

Ninety-Nine nodded and did as you told, circling your clit with her index finger and thumb followed by gently pressing and pulling it. You threw your head back with a moan, and she was determined to go further. She moved her hand towards your vulva and inserted a finger inside, your eyes widening in ecstacy and your body spasming.

"Aaah! Yes... you can put in 2 fingers... N-Ninety Nine...."

Ninety-Nine nodded and inserted another finger, slowly pushing your walls apart and going in until they were completely hilted inside. It was so warm and wet, she thought. Your walls were clenching her fingers and drenching them in your juices. She then attempted to pull them out and earned another whimper from you.

"Y-Yea...thrust them... you are doing right, aaahn!~"

Ninety-Nine quickly sheathed them inside and hit your sensitive spot, your body arching. She looked up to see your face drowned in absolute pleasure, this is what she wanted. She continued the thrusting movement as you said and she would be lying if she said she didn't enjoy this, it was a different feeling inside her and she wanted it more. She gazed at you exposed neck and suddenly leaned down to kiss your collarbone, her fingers not stopping their movements at all.

"Aaah.... I'm cumming.... keep doing this, Ninety-Nine... mhm~"

She licked up your neck and kissed your jaw on complete instincts, she didn't know what compelled her to but she felt like marking you like an animal. She scissored her fingers and hit all the right spots, her thumb even circling your clit now. You wrapped your arms around her and arched up as you released on her palm, a loud and melodic moan ringing in her ear. She pulled out her fingers and saw them covered in your juices while you panted and came down from your orgasm.

"T-There's tissue.... in the drawer.... haah..."

You pointed to the drawer in your table for her to wipe her hand but to your surprise, she licked up all your release from her fingers. The sight was erotic, to say the least. She was lapping them up like a starved dog, and you couldn't help but wonder how she would eat you out if you made her.

"Hmm.... slightly sweet and sticky. I see why that red-haired woman likes doing this so much."

"R-Red haired woman? Does she mean Cabernet?! Just how much has she seen me with others?!" you thought, bewildered.

"Do you.... want to do more?" Ninety-Nine asked.

"....I don't mind. Let me do it to you now." you said with a smile and Ninety-Nine smiled back as well, a rare smile on her face.

#path to nowhere #ninety nine #ptn #ptn x reader #ptn ninety nine #ninety nine x reader #99 x reader #path to nowhere x reader

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badbatchsprincess · 5 months

Text

Heated ~ pt.6

Pt.1 ~ Pt.2 ~ Pt.3 ~ Pt.4 ~ Pt.5 ~ Pt.6 ~ Pt.7 ~ Pt.8 ~ Pt.9

Masterlist

Summary: This is an ABO Bad batch!Poly x Omega Reader smut with a plot. This takes place as an AU before order 66. Y/N previously served under the 501st before being transferred to Special Forces 99. This is her adventure with these rowdy Alphas in a quickly changing universe.

THIS IS AN ABO AU ABOUT THE BAD BATCH (NO CANON OMEGA!) Due to the unfortunate situation of her name being Omega… Omega the child from the canon series is not going to be apart of this fanfic/porn with a plot. I feel obligated to put this warning in because it makes my skin crawl thinking anyone could make that mistake.

Warnings: Canon typical violence, sex!pollen trope, some injury, sexual themes, masturbation, heat cycles, rut

Finally I got his chapter done lololol there's 4k extra words in this one so please enjoy haha!

─ ⋅ ⋅ ⋅ ──── ♡ ─── ⋅ ⋅ ⋅ ──

"We're under attack!" Wrecker pointed to the sky as more Separatist bombing droids came whizzing by, firing at the Venators in orbit.

"I'm getting Y/N," Hunter started, taking off running towards the growing commotion, but he was suddenly taken off balance when Tech tripped him with his own foot, causing the Sergeant to go tumbling into the grass. He looked up at Tech with a glare.

"You cannot go," Tech said, looking at the camp. "With your heightened senses, it may kill you. From what I can see, those wearing helmets are okay due to their air filters, but those who were caught off guard are starting to display signs of infection. Rescuing Y/N will only risk our own infection, and then it will be irrelevant."

Hunter looked back at the camp, distraught.

"We can't just leave her," Hunter growled, standing back up again.

"What if she's infected?" Crosshair asked, looking down his scope at the medical tent. "The Omegas on the science team died."

Wrecker growled.

"The Omegas died because they had no Alpha to cure their induced heat," Tech read through the researcher's report. "The heat symptoms progressed too far unnaturally."

Suddenly, their com channel cracked. "Hunter?"

"Wolffe?" Hunter responded, looking back at the chaos across the clearing.

"I got her, Hunter!" Wolffe radioed in. "Are you at the Marauder?"

"Yes, we're up here," Hunter said, relieved he could finally take a breath. He grabbed his scope and looked down the rolling hills, trying to see through the foggy red dust.

"We're on our way," Wolffe turned his com off, leaving the 99's in anxious silence. Hunter could pick up the stench rolling off Wrecker and Tech. While the scent was significantly less, even Crosshair was getting nervous seeing the rising tensions in the crowd of 104th regs.

"I see them," Tech said, zooming in his lenses. "1 o'clock."

"What happened to her?" Hunter tried zooming in closer to their silhouette. Y/N was thrown over Wolffe’s shoulder, dangling limply, while Echo followed behind, holding a bloody rag over his face.

"Is she hurt?" Tech asked, trying to get a clearer image.

"I can't tell," Crosshair hissed.

Wolffe and Echo ran as fast as they could, dodging regs and shoving their way through the chaos. When they finally made it up the hill, Wolffe was panting and rubbing at his eyes, trying to wipe the dust from his skin.

The others backed up, not wanting to get any closer.

Wolffe set Y/N down on the plush grass, letting Echo kneel down and press his hand to her forehead. He adjusted the little filtration mask pressed to her face, letting her head lull to the side. She was knocked out cold.

"What the hell happened?" Crosshair couldn't believe it.

"I don't know," Wolffe rasped. "But you gotta get her out of here!" He was panting, starting to feel the effects.

"Tech, power up the ship, we're leaving now," Hunter placed his helmet on, securing the filtration system. The others did the same, running to get the ship primed and ready.

"Radio the General, please!" Wolffe was tearing at his armor, starting to feel the unbearable itch of a rut forming. "Fuck!"

Hunter bent down, picking up the tiny Omega and turned towards the ship.

"What about the other Omegas?" Echo asked, looking back at the camp. The infected regs were raising their noses in the air, seemingly trying to tail a particular scent.

"We can't save them all," Hunter decided, saving Y/N was the top of his priority. "We're not risking it."

Echo just nodded and followed him onboard the ship, letting the door close behind him.

When Tech started to pull the Marauder up into the air, they could see the Commander crawling in the grass, fighting the effects of the drug, but in the distance, they saw the beady eyes of the infected following Y/N’s trail.

They seemed to fall into rage when they realized the Omega had gotten away; their howls could be heard from the ship.

"Maker…" Echo was in disbelief. It was hoards of feral Alphas, hundreds of them.

"What happened to Pip?" Wrecker was nudging her limp body, pathetically trying to wake her up.

"Is she infected?" Tech asked.

"No," Echo confirmed. "She got the mask in time."

"Are you infected?" Hunter looked at their co-pilot.

"No," Echo shook his head. "I'm barely human, nonetheless an Alpha. I don't think it affects me the same way it does all of you."

"We should still check," Tech put the ship into autopilot and went into Y/N's bunk to grab her med kit.

"What happened to her?" Hunter asked, setting her down gently on the floor.

"We just got to the triage tent, she was clocking in when Wolffe came to speak with her," Echo noticed the way Hunter’s eyes narrowed, possessively he might add. He was going to love rousting Y/N when she finally wakes up. "They were talking when the bombs dropped. She saw the red and knew exactly what it was. She grabbed a respirator and tried to save her friend, that little skinny Omega."

"Taran," Tech chimed in.

"Yeah, sure, anyways," Echo looked over to his longest-known friend. "She got knocked over in the chaos and hit her head. Almost got trampled but Wolffe found her and got her out." Echo wanted to smirk so badly, knowing it was going to drive his unit up the wall to know Wolffe saved the day once again.

They had been pining for her ever since they met her, but Y/N was too oblivious to notice. But the arc trooper noticed everything. His sense of smell may have been demolished, but he could see it in all of their eyes.

Echo also may or may not have caught Crosshair rutting with an Omega that looked nearly identical to Y/N the last time they were back for quarterlies. Echo didn't say anything though, but he was always watching.

"What do we do?" Wrecker took off his helmet and sat on the floor next to Y/N.

"She'll need bacta for the head injury and probably pain management when she wakes," Tech informed.

"I'll do it," Crosshair knelt down, taking the pack. "I did it for her once on Crait."

The others just watched as he found the liquid bacta and placed it into her injector. He cleaned the site and pressed the mechanism close to her neck. He pressed the button and watched the dose administer. Her head lulled back into his hand, and he gently removed the respirator from her face.

"Ad’ika?" Hunter cooed, running a gloved hand over her cheek.

Crosshair kept his hawk eyes carefully trained on her eyelashes. She tried to flutter them open, but they were too heavy it seemed. Instead, she just clutched onto his chest plate weakly and groaned in pain.

"It's okay," Hunter whispered, watching Crosshair help her sit up. "You're safe."

She turned into Crosshair, feeling dizzy.

"Get her the painkiller," Tech fussed. Hunter loaded the new cartridge and handed it to the sniper. He pressed it to her shoulder and pushed the button, hearing her wince as the medicine entered her system.

"She's too weak, get her something to lay down on," Crosshair motioned to their bunks.

Wrecker disappeared into her bunk and came back with her cot mattress. They made room on the main cabin floor where Crosshair gently set her down on the mattress, letting her lay down comfortably.

She rolled onto her side, keeping her eyes closed, waiting for the medicine to kick in.

Hunter just looked to Echo, who was concerned, watching his friend in pain.

"What do we do now?" Wrecker asked, watching the Venators approach.

"We let them know what happened, and then I guess we go to Coruscant for quarterlies," Hunter crossed his arms, peering down at the little medic. "We're not going back to Kashyyyk. Not with Y/N."

"It’s been three months already?" Wrecker groused, he hated getting his implant replaced.

"Shockingly yes," Tech replied. "We'll be coming up on seventy-five rotations, give or take a few days." He settled back into his seat to send the transmission to General Plo’s ship.

Up ahead, the darkness of space was lit up with blue and red laser beams as the Republic forces engaged the Separatist warships. Tech stayed far enough away to not be noticed, but close enough to get the message out.

"Well then let's set a course for—" Echo was cut off when their ship was suddenly rocked violently.

"Separatists!" Tech pulled back the controls and started making a beeline away from the planet to make the jump to hyperspace.

"They're on our tail!" Echo exclaimed, watching the red blast fly past them.

"I know…" Tech tried to snake the ship hopefully to throw them, but the droid ship just locked on.

"Make the jump!" Crosshair bit out.

Tech flicked the switch on the console, hearing the hyperdrive power up. Tech set the course for Coruscant, and Echo pushed the lever. Just as the Marauder made the jump, there was a blast coming from the back of the ship.

Just as they jumped, the ship made a loud rumble before falling out of hyperspace. They all lurched forwards as the Marauder was beginning to lose control.

"We've lost left rear engine and hyperdrive," Echo was scrambling to gain the controls back.

"We're heading straight for Mimban," Tech pointed out, seeing the brown planet approaching quickly.

"We're going to have to make an emergency landing," Echo grabbed his steering and tried to pull up to slow the ship.

"Brace!" Tech yelled, pulling up the nose last minute.

The crash was violent and rough. The entire ship creaked as its hull bent under the impact. The lights overhead flickered before permanently shutting off, throwing the whole crew into total darkness. Everyone on board was flung forwards as the Marauder skidded to a halt into something soft.

The emergency lights turned on with a red glow, signaling a total system failure.

~~~

Everything was fuzzy and dizzying the longer you tried to refocus your vision. The pain killers were swirling in your system, making you feel good… really good actually. This was probably the best crash landing you've ever been a part of now that you're thinking about it.

"Y/N?" Echo's face was suddenly in yours. "What is wrong with her?"

You heard yourself giggling. Echo suddenly had two heads, only making you giggle more. Reaching out, your hands felt strange, like they had grown scales or something. You just looked at them, watching your fingertips change colors with an amused gasp.

"Crosshair gave her too much painkiller," Tech brought his flashlight to your eyes, watching them dilate. You placed a hand against Tech's helmet lens, blocking his view, making him swat your grabby hands away.

"What do we do?"

"We just gotta wait it out."

"Well, I don't think that will be a problem. I don't think we're getting out of here for a while."

You could hear their voices talking. Hunter's smokey voice was like honey to your ears. You chewed your lip, looking down at your boots, feeling your cheeks heat up. You felt a tingly warmth start to fill your tummy the longer he talked, and the feeling only seemed to move lower as he continued. You looked up and stared at his criminally slutty waist and fit ass from your jump seat with a longing stare.

You barely registered when he turned to face you with a raised brow. Caught, you turned your gaze up to meet his pretty face and pretty eyes. You bit your lip and blinked owlishly as he studied your face.

"That's freaking me out," Echo grumbled, watching you go out of your right mind.

"Well, let's get to work trying to repair the ship. I don't want to find out what's out here come nightfall," Hunter ordered, "and don't let her wander.”

Soon, you found yourself alone, happily swinging your feet from the jump seat without a care in the world. Echo arrived and adjusted your seat straps so you couldn’t dawdle off like a lost pup. You just giggled and poked at his head ports, making him scowl.

He forced you to drink some water, mumbling something about flushing your system.

You felt the warm Mimban breeze blow through the ship as the boys opened the hatch and got to work digging the ship out.

Tech came to feed you some ration bars and give you more water before checking your vitals. When he determined you were able to hold yourself up without falling over, he unclipped the jump seat straps and helped you get used to your feet again.

“I would suggest you just lay down for a while until you’re functioning properly again.” You clutched his arm while he helped you walk to the mattress on the floor. You plopped down on your bum before flopping over on your side.

“Alright then.” Tech pushed his glasses up and went back to tinkering in one of the side panels.

You pawed at the sky, trying to feel the breeze with your hands, which earned you a few glances from your concerned pack. You nibbled at the food they left for you, but it started to taste funny, and you only giggled more.

“I couldn’t have given her that much,” Crosshair watched you play with your food with an amused look on his face.

“She’s small, even for humanoid omega standards,” Tech ripped out a clump of fried wires and began cutting through the damage, “The dose you gave her was most likely for a full-grown alpha, such as Wrecker.”

“Kriff,” Crosshair whispered and turned back to help Tech.

~~~

Night was coming fast, and you had now come down from being stoned beyond your wildest imagination. You stared at the wall, suddenly remembering everything and realizing the dire situation you were all in. You were beginning to miss the delirium of the painkillers. Luckily, your headache was gone, and the bacta seemed to heal the head injury.

However, you were still royally pissed at your unit.

You didn’t forget what happened, and how they had treated you. You tucked your knees into your chest and decided zoning out into the wall would be better than feeling the rage boiling in your chest.

You noticed they were starting to call it quits making their way back inside the ship. You decided you wanted to be alone and grabbed the corner of your cot to drag it haphazardly through the nearly sideways ship. With a struggle, you got the mattress back into your bunk and hauled it up onto the metal slab. With one final grunt, you shoved the mattress back into place, giving yourself a rest.

You decided to change into something a little cooler. This planet seemed to be a lot warmer than Kashyyyk. You haven’t been able to see outside, but you could taste the humidity in the air and feel the warming breeze. You yanked your long sleeve off and swapped it out for a cropped tank. The tight cargos got swapped for loose ones, and you kicked off your boots, opting just for your socks.

You heard a knock on the door and expected it to be Tech needing something from his bunk, but it turned out to be Echo.

“Hey,” he said, closing the door behind him.

“Hey,” you replied, folding up your dirty clothes. Your nose immediately scrunched, “You reek.” It wasn’t his normal smell; it was something gross and terrestrial.

He sniffed his armpits, “I didn’t even think I still had sweat glands.”

You shook your head and pointed to his shoes, “Stinky!”

He looked down at the reddish mud caked onto his boots, “Oh… yeah, it’s nasty out there.”

You just made a face and covered your nose.

“You feeling okay?” He asked.

You nodded, “Yeah, but I don’t really know what’s going on. One second I’m on Kashyyyk and the next I’m higher than a hayroot, and then we’ve crash-landed on some stinky planet.”

“Well… you pretty much nailed it,” Echo scratched his head, “You got knocked out in the triage tent after separatists dropped the spice bombs. Then Wolffe carried you all the way back to the Marauder despite being dosed himself and handed you off to Hunter who tried to get away to keep everyone safe and get the message to the General, but we were shot down making the jump to lightspeed and then crash-landed here on Mimban.”

“Mimban?!” You screeched, “That’s in the middle of nowhere!”

He nodded solemnly.

“Did you guys send a distress call to the Republic fleet?”

“We tried… then Tech realized our comms have been squished.”

“Squished…” You narrowed your eyes.

“That was the word he used.”

“I see,” you crossed your arms, “So what I’m hearing is, we have no ship…”

“Correct.”

“No comms.”

“Correct.”

“No fleet.”

“Correct.”

“No one knows where we are.”

“Mhmm.”

“The entire 104th was chemically attacked.”

“Yes.”

“And we’re stranded on Mimban… with no way to leave.”

“Correct.”

“Are you all aware we are supposed to be on Coruscant in eleven days for quarterlies?”

“Unfortunately.”

“Mhmm,” you nodded, feeling the anxiety creeping in. Great, this is just perfect.

“Are you… alright?” He asked, watching your eye twitch slightly.

“No.”

There was a bout of silence…

He smacked his teeth, “It’s an unfortunate situation.”

You nodded vigorously, “One might say that.”

“An extremely awful and awkward situation…”

“Yeah… it is,” you pushed your tongue into the side of your mouth.

“Well… do you want dinner?”

“I think I lost my appetite,” you gave him a plastered smile.

“Let me know if that changes… I’ll leave you to it.” Echo turned on his heel, leaving your bunk and closed the door behind him. It was only a few seconds before he heard you scream violently into your pillow, making the others jump.

“I take it she figured it out,” Hunter uncovered his ears.

Echo shook his head, “Yeah, I’d say she figured it out.”

“FUCK!” Your muffled scream made Hunter cringe again.

“I think she’s taking the news quite well,” Tech poked at his food.

“Was that you making a joke?” Crosshair raised a brow.

“I thought my sarcasm was obvious,” Tech bit into his warmed food.

“How was that obvious?” Wrecker grumbled.

“We have to get off this rock,” Echo chewed his dinner, “Stating the obvious, but your implants are going to wear out. If we don’t get an evac or somehow manage to fix the ship, we’re going to have a big problem.”

“Our first priority is to fix the com system and try to contact the nearest fleet,” Tech replied, “That would be the most promising scenario given we have no other hurdles.”

“And if we can’t?” Echo raised a brow.

“Then we’ll deal with it when the time comes,” Hunter was trying not to think about the fact that they could be dealing with an omega in heat with alphas in rut in a very confined space. The potential for a mess was likely.

“That gives me a lot of confidence,” Echo snarked.

“It’s all we can do.”

~~~

Day two on Mimban consisted of you coming out of your bunk earlier than the others to eat your breakfast. You looked outside the cockpit window to see nothing but orange fog clouding any terrain. You sighed and prayed to the Force that it would guide you back safely.

The rest of the day, you helped Echo, trailing him, trying to help in any way possible. You quickly realized that the soil on Mimban was reddish-brown clay and it was soft. That was probably the reason the ship hadn’t snapped in two on impact, but the nose of the ship was buried into a thick pile of the stuff. The boys were busy trying to dig out the hull while you, Tech, and Echo fixed the interior damage.

Day three, you were starting to get a little weary. Sleeping on an angle was a bit rough, and Tech decided rest was beneath him. He stayed up all night trying to repair the comm system but didn’t seem to be making any good progress. Echo had you carry around all of the spare parts he needed to try and fix the left engine. Hunter had elected to venture out with Crosshair to see if there were any towns that might be able to help. Wrecker was on shovel clay duty.

Day four, you realized your unit was totally alone in the middle of butt-fuck nowhere. There wasn’t anything within remote traveling distance, and when Hunter and Crosshair came back in the morning with the news, you left to lock yourself in your bunk and cry.

Day five was much of the same. You leaned your forehead against the side of the ship while Echo abused your laser suture to weld some pieces of metal to the engine core. You were starting to feel the weight of the situation as the emotional exhaustion was starting to settle in. You missed Kashyyyk. You missed the food, and the fresh water, and the clean air. You missed talking to your unit. They still haven’t apologized, and you’re still giving them the cold shoulder even though they clearly cared enough to protect you from the attack on the war camp. Eating your meals in the bunks was the only time you got to yourself.

Day six was when the others started getting a little agitated. It started with Tech fussing about the mud caking on his boots and ass. He tried shaking off the thick clay but ended up getting so frustrated he screamed and kicked the Marauder with full force. It was so out of character everyone stopped what they were doing to look. No one said anything, but they watched their pack mate rip off his shoes and throw them violently into the cabin with a loud splat followed by very creative cursing.

Wrecker was starving as usual, and his food-related complaining was starting to make your stomach growl too. You had to resort to rationing your rations as you all were not prepared to be stranded for days on end.

“Someone had to have seen us get shot down, right?” You asked Echo, handing him his screwdriver.

“I don’t know, pip,” he sighed, scratching his head, “I don’t think this planet is very inhabited. And if it is, we don’t know if it’s advanced in any way.”

You sighed, taking the screwdriver back and handing him a wrench.

“I think the others are starting to lose it,” you whispered and peeked around the corner to see Tech angrily messing with the console with his mismatched socks on display.

“I’ve certainly never seen Tech yell before,” he snickered.

“I miss Kashyyyk,” you sighed.

“Do you miss Kashyyyk or a certain alpha on Kashyyyk?” he joked.

“Echo!” You whispered.

“What?” he laughed, “I’m thinking about that omega back on Coruscant I had before Skako Minor.”

You gasped, feigning scandal.

Echo smirked, “Whatever gets you through the day.”

“Guys, come out here!” Hunter’s voice echoed throughout the ship.

The three of you came out of the ship to see that they had cleared most of the clay away from the ship.

“We need help pushing her over so she’s back on her feet!” Hunter said, ushering you all to help. When you all were in position, you pushed with everything you had (Wrecker did most of the work), but you all watched in awe as the Marauder was finally on all four landing pads.

“We did it!” Wrecker hooted and picked you up spinning you around before depositing you back in the mud. You gave him a little laugh which made his eyes light up. If he was happy about the ship, that was nothing compared to hearing your voice again.

They all got back to their tasks while Wrecker lingered a bit trying to figure out how to hear that pretty sound again.

You just followed Echo back into the now level ship.

“She laughed.” Wrecker mused, “I haven’t heard her laugh in so long.”

Hunter just gave him a saddened look. He knew him and Crosshair still had to apologize for their behavior back on Kashyyyk. But so many things that happened since then he didn’t have time to think about what to say or how to even approach you. It was killing him that you didn’t want to be around them anymore. He was angered by the fact that Wolffe has offered to take you in, and you hadn’t denied him. Had they really pushed you so far? Your cries when Crosshair forced you to submit out of fear haunted him. It made his inner alpha cringe. He regrets not stepping in but he knew his jealousy had overtaken him. Hearing you giggling with Wolffe and coming back wreaking of him like a mated pair made his blood boil. He was far more territorial than he had ever given himself credit for even though he didn’t actually have a claim on you.

You on the other hand, had no desire to talk to either Hunter or Crosshair, even in this desolate situation you’ll never forget the feeling of Crosshair forcing you to do that.

Day seven then turned into eight, which morphed into nine and ten. By the eleventh day, you knew your time was becoming limited. The past few days had everyone’s sense of smell acting up. The pungent odors from the planet’s atmosphere were becoming stronger and you knew the implants were wearing out.

You knew you couldn’t beat around the bush any longer, by dinner time on the eleventh night, you emerged from your bunk full of anxiety. You walked through the galley and faced your pack who conversed over their food.

“So, whats the plan?”

They all whipped their heads around shocked to hear your voice. You stood there raising a brow and crossing your arms waiting for the shock to wear off and someone say something.

“I’m assuming you’re referring to our implants dissipating.” Tech spoke first.

You nodded.

“Well that means we have an undisclosed amount of time before we all inevitably have a rut and you a heat. That puts us in a precarious situation that I think-”

“We know!” Echo snapped.

“We can turn Wreckers bunk into your place for the week.” Hunter started, “You can stay there and we can rig the lock so only Echo can open it. The rest of us will just deal with it out here.”

“Sounds like a plan.” You retreated back into your bunk.

“Y/N! Wait.” Hunter stood up and followed you. He stepped inside your bunk to find you nervously chewing on your lip. You turned around to face him looking like a kicked pup.

“I-I…” He stuttered wanting nothing more than to reach out and embrace you like you had allowed before this whole fight.

“What Hunter?” You were getting agitated with his silence.

“I…I’m sorry, I’m bad at communicating my feelings.” He sighed knowing he was starting to sound like Crosshair, “I don’t know how I should approach you or… I…”

You just help up your hand stopping him, “Come back when the words find you.”

He sighed, “No I-I just need to tell you… how sorry I am. I was wrong. I should have stopped Crosshair and I shouldn’t have punched Wolffe. I just… something came over me and I lost it. It wasn’t okay and I should have protected my pack…I should have protected you and I’m so sorry we’re in this situation again. I don’t know what to do, I-I-“

“Hunter.” You stopped him, “Thank you for saying something.”

He shook his head, “No, you should be angry with me… with us. This isn’t how a pack is supposed to be. At least I don’t think. I’ve never actually been apart of a real one given I don’t have a family.”

“Hunter…we are your pack.” You sighed.

“I just… wait what?” His face suddenly lightened, “y-you’re staying?”

You raised a brow confused.

“It’s just I thought you were starting to court Wolffe, or rather he was courting you and then he offered you a spot in his ranks…” Hunter babbled.

“Hold up.” You shook your head, “Commander Wolffe?”

Hunter looked at you and blinked.

“Courting me? Me courting Commander Wolffe?” You couldn’t hold in the laugh anymore, “That’s what this is about? You thought I-… oh my god!” You were howling.

“He- you-“ Hunter crossed his arms confused now.

“Me what?” You giggled.

“You came back… from being with him.” He mumbled.

“Did you not hear me when I got back to camp?” You were amused at his confusion.

“It was kinda hard to listen when you came back covered in his scent.” He said pointedly.

“Hunter… I almost drowned in the river.” You scoffed, “Wolffe had to pull me out before I got swept down stream.”

He just let his mouth lull open.

“And yes, while we may have been naked, nothing happened…”

“You were WHAT?” Echo screeched from the main cabin.

“You were what?” Hunter repeated with a growl.

“Chill,” You warned.

“You didn’t tell me that!” Echo yelled.

“I may have left that detail out.” You yelled back.

“Look,” You smiled up at Hunter adjusting your crossed arms, “Wolffe has a good ass but he’s definitely not an alpha I’m interested in like that. Now what I cannot figure out is what the hell happened that made you all hate him so much. You didn’t have a problem with him hitting on me on Coruscant.”

Hunter just reached back and scratched his nape, “I uh…”

“Tell her Hunt!” Echo chided from the other room. What a little eavesdropper.

Hunter shifted uncomfortably, “He-he asked if I had claimed you on Crait…”

Butterflies fluttered violently in your stomach. You tried your hardest to steel your emotions but he continued, “I said no. That was the truth, but then he made it pretty clear he was interested in pursuing you. I guess I-”

Suddenly the pieces clicked…

“Hunter, are you jealous?” You put your hands on your hips.

“W-What?” He sputtered and you watched his un-tattooed side of his face turn pink.

“And Crosshair too?” You raised a brow. That would explain his sudden aggression towards you.

“I-I uh,” He genuinely didn’t know what to say but you knew the truth.

Suddenly you remembered the way they all started acting weird after Wolffe talked to hunter. They were all starting to get territorial. They thought Wolffe was taking you from them and they started changing their behavior trying to get your attention.

“I’m coming to save Hunter before he implodes.” Echo stepped into the bunk and let Hunter walk out redder than Mimban clay. Echo gave you a playful look before disappearing back into the cabin leaving you alone to think about everything. The one thing you desired was at least some kind of olive branch from Crosshair, you knew you’d never get a heartfelt apology, but until then you’d wait. He owed you that at least.

~~~

That night, your anxiety was at an all time high. Sleeping in the newly converted bunk the boys had made was making you a bit uneasy. Wrecker’s alpha scent was calming, but you were used to having Tech near by, instead the square box was feeling a bit prison like. The knowledge that you were locked in too didn’t help. You would have preferred to have slept with the door open but Echo insisted that this be how it is.

You curled up on your side holding Lula trying to close your eyes and let sleep take over, but your elevated heart rate disagreed.

You picked up your com and pressed the button, “Echo!” You whispered.

The line was quiet for a moment before he responded, “What?” His voice was raspy with sleep.

“I’m literally fine can you please let me out? I can’t sleep.” You spoke softly into the device.

“No.” The line went dead and you rolled over onto your back with a groan. You picked up your data pad and decided to read one of your smutty holobooks instead.

~~~

“What did she want?” Hunter rasped waking up from the noise.

“She wanted out.” Echo set the device down and curled back up onto his side.

“She’s not an animal Echo…” He sighed rubbing at his eyelids, “It’s not a cage.”

Echo just blinked up at the bottom of Hunter’s bunk, “…No.”

~~~

The mafia boss thrust his massive length into the sweet little omega’s pussy. Her soft mewls filled the gold lined dinning hall with her sweet sound. This only seemed to spur him on.

“Yeah?” He thrust a little harder, “You like when I maim the men who hurt you? You like feeling their blood on my hands?” He nuzzled into her neck lightly teasing her mating gland with his fang.

Elina suddenly clenched down at his words and he smirked knowing thats exactly what his little princess liked.

“Mmm I like that too Caspian.” Y/N chewed on her finger nail finally getting past the enemies to lovers portion and right into the good stuff. Reaching down for her water mug, Y/n suddenly felt a painful knot form in her abdomen.

With a grunt you put down your holonovel and rubbed at your stomach feeling the pain settle. With a deep breath you tried picking up your book again, but the movement caused another one to tear right through your muscles. You yelped and forced yourself into a sitting position.

“No. No. No.” You whispered trying to massage the pain away.

“Please no.” You begged but the dull pain was starting to become something more sinister. The heat started to emanate from the pain and spread throughout your body giving you a flush. You suddenly were uncomfortable in your little sleep set. You couldn’t get further enough away from the blankets on your cot and opted to curl up on the floor absorbing the cold steel floor desperate for relief.

~~~

Hunter was having a relatively boring dream when his senses started to draw him back to the land of the living.

He couldn’t help but raise his nose in the air while he blinked awake trying to follow the deliciously sweet scent. He barely had his eyes open when a gut wrenching yowl rattled the entire ship.

Suddenly Crosshair was shot up in the darkness holding his blaster trying to figure out what startled him.

“What was that?” Wrecker’s voice croaked from the floor.

Crosshair rubbed his eyes looking around. Everyone was sat upright listening carefully when another more pained warble made the hair stand up on the back of their necks.

“Y/N…” Hunter said looking at their closed door knowing she was just on the other side of the hall surely in pain.

“It started.” Echo laid back down using his pillow to cover his ears.

“It seems she’s… in heat.” Tech searched for his glasses.

“What do we do?” Wrecker asked concerned.

“Nothing.” Hunter groused and laid back down, “Go back to sleep.”

Another whine echoed making Wrecker tense, “She sounds like in pain shouldn’t we help her?”

“That’s the point idiot.” Crosshair snapped while he relaxed back down on his side staring at the wall.

Wrecker just grumbled to himself and forced himself to ignore pip’s desperate cries.

~~~

“Kriff.” You hissed and writhed on the floor feeling the unbearable heat terrorize your entire body. In this moment you cursed the GAR with everything you had. You missed Layla, she wouldn’t have ever let this happen to you. Instead the universe just had to crash land you on this hellscape of a planet with 5 devastatingly attractive Alphas whose scent was beginning to permeate the blast door’s seal.

You moaned smelling the delicious alpha pheromones as they all danced around your little cage like the worst form of torture. The smell immediately triggered your slick response. The wetness soaked your panties and little sleep shorts ruining them totally.

You cried out praying one of the men would snap and take pity on you.

This was significantly less luxurious than the heat house on Naboo. What you would give to have knotting toys and a vibrator right now. You shoved your tiny hand into your pants bringing them to the source of your wetness and dragged them through your silky folds.

You bit back a moan when you found your clit and started to circle it just how you liked. Just like the last time, you came fast, but the burn didn’t ebb. You just growled wanting nothing more than to be stretched from the inside. You wanted a thick knot to cure your pain.

You writhed as another wave of cramps hit and you let out a scream.

~~~

Hunter had held out longer than he thought we could have. He at least made it to sunrise before he couldn’t take listening to her suffering anymore. It was literally his biology to service an omega. Listening to her helpless sounds was making him feel ill and the rock hard boner in his pants wasn’t helping either. Her cries were so tempting. He tried to cover his ears but it was like a siren’s call. He knew that was the point, but it didn’t make it easier to hear especially because he could hear way more than the others. He could hear her panting, her silenced moans, the way her fingers squelched as she tried desperately to fill herself to dull the pain. It was a torture like no other.

“I can’t take this.” Hunter said throwing himself over the side of his bunk and exited the ship. He noted how the others hadn’t gone back to sleep either. How could they?

When he passed by the door, he heard the way she gasped and crawled over to the door trying to listen to his footsteps. Her desperate whines turned into sultry cooes trying to lure him closer to her. She was lost to the heat. He could tell from her cute little sounds, and the way he could smell her slick from the hatch door. She was slipping deeper and deeper by the minute.

With a bit of willpower, he continued outside hearing her crying fade and turn back into suffering wails.

He huffed and sat down on the hatch steps feeling on edge. He shoved his hands over his ears trying to down her out. He knew the others were starting to be affected, even their scents started to spike in response to the distressed omega. It wouldn’t be long before they were in rut too.

~~~

It was time for Echo to feed you. He seemed to be the only one not affected by the now pungent smell. The others resorted to fleeing outside the ship like Hunter had hours ago. Echo was obviously the only one permitted to open your door to make sure you were eating and could use the fresher.

“Hey Y/N?” Echo knocked on the blast door.

He just heard a small sound letting him know you were in there, “I got you some dinner and thought you could stretch your legs?”

“Alpha?” She rasped coming nearer.

Echo used his special pass code to open the door letting it slide open to reveal you absolutely drenched in sweat and shaking on your knees on the bare floor. He knelt down holding your food tray setting it down gently in front of you. You peered up at him with your massively dilated eyes. He sighed knowing how painful all this must be for you.

“Please Echo.” You whined reaching out for him grabbing his arm. He looked down at your flushed wrist feeling its heat on his skin. He leaned forwards to press his palm to your forehead making you preen. Your skin was hot making him a bit hesitant. He was really hoping you weren’t in any kind of health predicament because of this. He’s personally never seen an omega suffer through a heat alone. His partners had always been cared for and it had never gotten to this point. He was a little distressed looking at your current state. It felt wrong. What little part of him still carried the Alpha instincts, felt for you. He wanted to comfort you but knew it couldn’t do any good.

“I’ll take you to the fresher when you finish eating.” He said backing up making you drop with wrist with a pout.

“I’m not hungry.” You sulked.

“I know hun, but you have to eat something or you’ll get sick.” He reasoned.

“But…I-I…” You chewed your lip anxiously.

“Y/N,” He sat back with a more stern voice said, “Eat your dinner.”

“Can I use the fresher first.” You tried to negotiate.

“Fine.” He sighed standing up to assist you in standing, “But then you’re going to eat right after this, you haven’t eating anything in 24 hours.”

You just nodded and let him assist you to the fresher. Once inside, he left you to your devices to use the toilet and turn on the shower to cold. Once inside the shower, you keened feeling the freezing water soothe your burning skin. You tried your best to wash the suds over your hair and skin trying to clean yourself to the best of your ability despite the grogginess.

Echo handed you a fresh towel from a crack in the door letting you dry off and pull on fresh clothes he had set out.

You wobbled back to the room seeing the plate of food on the floor you had neglected and internally sighed. You didn’t want to eat. It didn’t sound good. Instead you wanted an alpha, a really really strong alpha. One that would scent you and fill you up so good. Better than that dumb food.

“Y/N?” Echo eyed the tray, “Remember what you promised?”

You pouted, “Echo please I’m not hungry.”

He just rubbed his face getting frustrated and grumpy.

“Can I have something to nest with?” You asked giving him your best begging eyes, “The floor is cold.”

He sighed and got up leaving you to glare at the steaming rations. When he came back he had every cargo/moving blanket he could scrounge up along with a few pieces of your clothing. He set them down presenting them to you and you chirped happily taking the fabrics from him with greed.

“Now will you eat?” He was getting annoyed.

You ignored him and started fussing around with the blankets rubbing the slightly rough material on your face trying to place them just right. It was making you a bit feral trying to place them correctly in the corned furthest from the door.

You heard the door slide shut behind you letting you know that Echo had abandoned his attempt to get you to eat something. You smiled finally feeling like you were getting somewhere. You wiped your sweat from your forehead and continued rubbing your scent all over the new nest.

Unexpectedly, the door slid open again and you spun around at being disturbed. This time, Echo wasn’t alone. Next to him stood Crosshair, who looked a bit crossed.

“Alpha.” You stood to walk over to him. His delicious smell was making you hazey and you practically tried to throw yourself at him. Crosshair came to save you…

“Stop.” His tone made you freeze on the spot. Your body started to vibrate the longer you scented him and stared into his piercing eyes.

“Echo said you aren’t eating, ad’ika.” His voice was making more slick produce in your panties. You swore you saw his nose flare at the smell that was radiating off of you. The only thing you could process in your dumb omega mind was how good his knot would feel like inside you right about now.

“Omega.” He snarled. You whined. Alpha is upset.

“I’m not h-hungry.” You whispered casting your eyes down to his boots.

“You will eat and you will finish that entire glass of water do you understand?” He commanded with a stern voice you weren’t used to. But man, did it do something to your instincts. You nearly fell to your knees pulling the tray into your lap. His alpha tone was like nothing you had ever heard before, and it sounded so so good.

“Yes, Alpha.” You said picking up the spork and shoving the first bite of food into your mouth, when you swallowed you took the tooka mug of water chugged the liquid not realizing how thirsty you had actually become. You looked up at the two Alphas desperate for their approval. Crosshair just gave you a little nod wanting you to continue.

“Thank you.” Echo whispered.

Crosshair grunted trying to keep himself in check. Even though he was engineered to have inhuman levels of self control and patience, somehow seeing you kneeling on the floor desperately trying to finish your plate to please him was making his pants tighten. The alpha in him was desperate to take your pain away. Echo had worried them when he said you were refusing to eat, he asked Crosshair to give the command knowing he’d be able to control himself for at least a little. He still was upset about your weight when you had come back from Naboo. Those karking droids couldn’t take care of you as well as a partner could. He knew he had no other choice but to step in.

“I’m done Alpha.” You said sweetly placing the tray down hoping he’d give you a reward.

“Good girl.” Crosshair praised watching your eyes light up as Echo took the tray away, “Now you’re going to eat everything Echo gives you, do you understand?”

She suddenly pouted realizing he wasn’t staying.

“Omega?” He raised a brow.

You nodded letting him know you understood.

Then to your chagrin, they closed and locked the door once again. You gave an anxious whine hoping they’d come back, but when the door remained closed despite your hopefully thinking, you resigned to the nest on the floor.

~~~

“She ate.” Crosshair joined the others in the makeshift tent they created outside. The others visibly relaxed.

Crosshair noticed Hunter’s cheeks turning pink as he seemed to be locking his vision onto the floor… the little omega must be trying to get herself off again he thought. Hopefully she’d settle down soon and sleep leaving them all to toil in the increasing rut symptoms.

“Is it getting hotter?” Wrecker tried fanning himself.

“You’re in rut Wrecker.” Tech bit out yanking at his own collar.

“Argh!” The giant groaned.

Hunter shifted uncomfortably noting the near painful bulge in his pants. That damn omega was making his entire system feel like it was on the brink of short circuiting. He was starting to get a little anxious on top of his agitation. It had never felt like this before…granted he didn’t ever let it progress like this…

“I’m so…” Wrecker stood up and pushed his fist into the nearest rock, “Argh!”

Pieces of red earth went flying everywhere.

“Wrecker!” Hunter snapped, “Go rub one out, thats an order!”

The giant just stomped away out into the distance to relive himself.

“I’ll admit, this is beginning to feel unbearable.” Tech slumped against the rock he was leaning on to stare up at the night sky.

“Imagine how Pip feels.” Echo sighed hoping to get some shut eye. She was being uncharacteristically quiet.

So much so, that after a bated breath, the others perked up their heads including Hunter trying to figure out why it was so silent.

Then there was a loud moan breaking the silence and they continued on knowing she was fine.

“This is cruel.” Crosshair crossed his arms looking at Hunter, “You didn’t see her.” His disapproval had been known since it had started.

“You don’t think I know that?” Hunter snarled, “But what the fuck are we supposed to do?”

“Go fuck her!” Crosshair leered.

“We cannot do that.” Hunter shook his head despite how much his body agreed with Crosshair.

“So you’re going to let her suffer like this for six more days?” Crosshair rolled his eyes at his stupidly moral brother, “This is cruel to her and you know it.”

“Since when do you give a fuck about her?” Hunter narrowed his eyes challengingly.

“I’ve always given a fuck about her.” He bared his teeth, “Like you said, she’s pack!”

Hunter just stared at his little brother. While Crosshair may be harsh and unyielding, Hunter couldn’t ignore the tiny soft spot Pip had carved out into his stone cold facade. It was the smaller things, Crosshair brining her stuff, keeping an eye on her wherever they may be, the gentle way he holds her when she’s in need, the bastard still treated her like shit out of jealousy, but that didn’t change the fact that Hunter did in fact see it.

“Alright everyone calm down.” Echo put a hand up in the air, “You’re hormones are taking over.”

Tech decided to stand up to stretch, the clay earth was dampening his trousers making him cringe. He really would prefer to be on Kashyyyk right about now, at least there they had wood for a fire and fresh meat. He decided it would be best for him to also find a secluded space to relieve himself before the frustration became too much.

“Then there were three.” Crosshair closed his eyes again trying to focus on anything else besides the throbbing in his pants.

Echo cleared his throat, “I agree with Crosshair.”

“What?” Both the Sargent and the sniper said at once.

Echo just looked at Hunter, “I already feel guilty about leaving her at that heat center, granted she had way more available to her, but this is wrong. You didn’t see her Hunter, she’s delirious.”

“No! We’re not subjecting her to that.” Hunter growled.

“What if she chooses?” Echo said diplomatically.

“It doesn’t change the fact that eventually she’s going to not be in heat and have to live with us. Then she’s definitely going to transfer to the wolf pack. She’ll hate us.”

Crosshair growled menacingly at the mention of the 104th.

“I don’t think thats the case.” Echo tapped his chin.

“What do you mean?” Hunter questioned.

“I just… look she hasn’t said anything to me, but I have eyes. She’s not oblivious to the way you four have been slowly courting her. She knows none of you are going to make a move without threatening to upset the others so she ignores it.” Echo sighed, “I just don’t think she’ll be as upset at you think Hunter.”

“I still don’t think it’s the right thing to do. She said she hasn’t had a heat in two years. Clearly she’s not interested.”

“Well… that’s not entirely true.” Echo smirked.

Hunter raised a curious brow.

“She had a bit of a thing with the captain stationed on Ryloth, before she transferred to you.” Echo continued, “It was after she was stranded in that village with the droids. The captain had been the first to find her with the pup. Everyone swore he fell in love at first sight. The lovesick idiot couldn’t stay away from her.”

“They were in a relationship?” Hunter prodded he fought back the jealousy flaring in his chest… with a reg?

“No, no.” Echo shook his head, “Just an arrangement. When she had a breakout heat, he’d be the on she went to.”

“Which captain?” Crosshair snapped.

“Howzer.” Echo hid a cheeky smile.

“Was he assigned to helping Cham Syndulla?” Hunter asked.

“Thats the one.” Echo confirmed.

They sat there in contemplative silence. Wrecker and Tech were making their way back at this point, pink cheeked, and sweaty.

“So, how would this work?” Hunter thumbed his chin, “How does this work without causing a massive problem?”

“Are you worried about her or the others?” Echo asked.

“Both.” Hunter answered, “I think it’s obvious we all like her.”

“We let her choose.” Crosshair repeated Echo.

“Then whoever it is, helps her, and everyone else agrees to be civil.” Echo added.

“And what about you?” Crosshair raised a brow.

Echo chuckled, “I don’t know if you noticed but…” He gestured down at his body, “Not an alpha anymore. Barely a human at that. I’m not affected by her smell or noise.”

“What are you guys talking about?” Wrecker had an idea but he wanted to make sure he wan’t imagining it.

“We’re putting Pip out of her misery.” Hunter shook his head unable to shake the feeling that this was a bad idea.

“Are you suggesting what I think you are?” Tech was a bit in shock that his brother caved like this.

Hunter just looked to Crosshair who spoke up, “Let’s get this over with.”

They got up, and made their way inside the ship all filing into the main cabin where Echo scooted past them to start entering the access code to Wrecker’s bunk.

The Alphas were squirming in their shoes in the presence of such strong pheromones. Her scent was everywhere and it was thick they could practically taste it on their tongues.

The door unlocked and slid open causing Echo to turn his eyes up to the ceiling. Inside, Y/N was nearly naked writhing on the floor as more cramps coursed through her little body.

~~~

“Alpha?” You whispered feeling how hoarse your voice had become.

“Just me tiny.” Echo folded his arms looking away trying to give you a little dignity.

“Are you making me eat again?” You asked sitting up to look at him.

“No Ad’ika… can you put on some pants?” He cleared his throat.

You got up on wobbly legs and grabbed a pair of panties and pulled them on with an agitated huff. Had he been still a normal reg, he wouldn’t have ever been able to resist such a pretty thing like you. He was starting to wonder how Howzer didn’t seal the deal and claim you when he had you like this.

“Thank you.” He sighed and looked back down at you. You noticed him looking to his side and wondered what he was seeing. “I’m going to let you out. The others have agreed to help you on one condition.”

“An alpha?” Your eyes suddenly lit up and excitement boiled in your tummy.

“Mhmm.” He nodded, “They’ve agreed to play nice, but you have to choose okay?”

“Okay.” You slowly made your way out of the confinement space raising your nose in the air smelling the delicious scent of purebred alpha. When you turned into the galley your scent spiked in excitement. Echo helped you stop swaying as you entered the main cabin. You let out a gasp seeing your pretty alphas all in one space.

“Alright, you got your pick of the litter.” Echo nudged you forward.

“It’s okay Ad’ika.” Hunter invited you to come closer.

You couldn’t help but feel the thrill of seeing them having to adjust themselves at the sight of you. You stepped closer taking Hunter’s sturdy hand.

“I have to choose?” You asked with doe eyes. He nodded.

You leaned forwards bravely placing your hands on his firm chest. The warmth was making you shiver. You brought your nose forward and pressed into his neck. He smelled as good as he did back on Anakin’s Venator. You shamelessly crawled into his lap straddling him. He let out a surprised yelp feeling your warmth on his crotch. He nearly collapsed when you affectionately rubbed your cheek up against his feeling his stubble along his chin. You repeated on the other side scenting him, you were getting frustrated with how he kept his hands off of you respectfully. You wanted him to grab at the tiny scraps of clothing you were still wearing and tear them off already.

“Alright sweetheart come’re.” Crosshair was getting jealous and lifted you off of his brother. You purred liking his dominance. He towered over you as he leaned against the dining table. You fisted his shirt in your hands as his hands wandered your back letting you explore him. You really liked how his presence dwarfed yours. His smell was similar to Hunter’s but just slightly different making him uniquely Crosshair. You stood on your tiptoes to reach his neck, he took pity on you and leaned down slightly to help. Your mouth instantly started to water and you opened your mouth to stick out your tongue to get a taste when his hand immediately fisted into hair to wrench your head back.

“Ah ah ah.” He chided, “Be good and follow Echo’s rules.”

You pouted before relenting, ignoring the rush of slick sliding down your thighs.

Next was Tech. He shifted slightly when you approached. You stood between his parted legs and bent over giving Hunter a perfect view of your dripping core and soaked panties. The poor Alpha gripped his chair so hard the metal probably bent.

“Hi Tech.” You smiled sweetly bending one knee to place it between his legs thinking he’d let you. Instead he took you by surprise and grabbed your neck keeping you from making your move. He raised a brow and tilted his head slightly in a domineering way you didn’t expect from the pilot it sent a rush through you.

“You heard Crosshair.”

Crosshair snorted watching Tech control your movements, it shocked him too.

“Yes sir.” You whispered letting him guide you to his scent gland. You shifted to get a good smell letting your hands wander his shoulders a bit hoping he’d let you run your fingers through is hair. When you tried, he leaned into your touch giving you the cue. You greedily let your nails scrape against his scalp and you felt the way he was fighting back a groan. When you were satisfied, you then turned to Wrecker who was watching every single micro movement you made.

“Wrek.” You smiled and crawled over Tech to sit in his lap. They didn’t stop you when you climbed over Tech to straddle the giant. Wrecker placed a massive hand on the small of your back making you shiver with his warmth. His scent was similar just like his brothers, but each of them had tiny notes of something different. They were equally delicious and you could help yourself but to grind down on his lap making him smile and moan.

“Omega…” Hunter warned.

“She’s a greedy little thing isn’t she?” Crosshair raised a brow.

“So?” Echo asked looking at you.

“I can’t choose.” You pouted pushing yourself into Wrecker who happily let you. You rubbed your forehead against his neck liking his scent. You hadn’t really been able to smell any of them before, not with your implants intact. But now, ugh it was so good. Your entire body trembled with excitement being around so many perfect alphas.

“What?” They all asked. That’s never happened before. Usually omegas can pick out one scent that they prefer.

“I don’t wanna- ah!” You clenched weakly around Wrecker as another wave of cramps pushed through. You let out a pained whine, “Help me. Please!” You begged to the room.

“Y/N we can’t help you until you tell us what you want.” Tech said struggling to control himself. Wrecker rubbed soothing hands up and down your back in an effort to relax you again.

You squirmed against Wrecker and tucked your face into his neck again mumbling.

They just looked confused before turning to Hunter.

He looked up at Crosshair then Tech, “She said she wants… all four.”

─ ⋅ ⋅ ⋅ ──── ♡ ─── ⋅ ⋅ ⋅ ──

Taglist: @substantial-exposure @rains-on-kamino @minimissmoo @z-and-the-batboys @aynavaano @9902sgirl

#abo #crosshair #hunter #wrecker #tech #smut #the bad batch #star wars #clones #99 #wolffe #commander wolffe #howzer #omega

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clover-system · 3 months

Text

The longest list of anti-endo sources I've ever seen

While trying to find something else using Tumblr's infamous search engine, I came across this absolute gem:

NINE SOURCES!!! That's a record!! This is incredible!

@radpocalypse, listen. I am about to tear these to shreds, but before I do, I want you to know that you have my respect for not only compiling the longest list of sources I have ever seen an anti-endo provide, and not only doing so seemingly not directly prompted, but typing out every single link by hand, on mobile, without making a single mistake. Incredible work.

And also, to be completely honest, if I had nine sources supporting a belief, I almost certainly wouldn't look into them this closely. But, hey, that's what strangers on the internet with opposing views are for.

One more thing before the debunk: Endogenic systems do not claim to have DID etc. without trauma. They just don't. Whether it could be possible is often debated as an edge case, usually just to win an argument against someone of the opposing side, but really, it's irrelevant for 99% of the community. A good chunk are questioning OSDD based on later trauma, but as far as I am aware, no one on this website is claiming a completely endogenic plural disorder.

However, I don't want to dismiss entire pages based on this alone without further commentary, and it's a fun intellectual exercise regardless. So, whenever I use green text, I'm just playing Devil's Advocate under the premise of "If I was claiming to have DID without trauma (which neither I nor anyone else afaik is), would this source actually debunk that claim?" My syster will also occasionally pop in with purple, since she was cocon while I was writing this.

My dad just walked into my room and literally said "hey how it's going". You know, like. Like that one post. Amazing.

Anyway, civility established. Now come along with me on this long long journey of ten minutes of reading. Maybe put some music on in the background, if that will help you get through it. I had Near's Theme on while writing.

Here we go.

Link 1: McLean Hospital

Ok, main thing that caught my eye was

According to a 2010 Psychiatric Times article, only 5% of people with DID exhibit obvious switching between identity “states.”

Very interesting! Even with all of the "idk who's fronting" memes, 5% is really not that high. Though maybe online spaces like these help train the ability to identify it? The reference trail leads back to a book by Kluft but I don't really feel like going through dozens of pages for this. Definitely making a note of this though; I wonder if there have been any follow-up studies on this.

Not much to say here other than that. No mention of plurality outside DID.

DID is associated with long-term exposure to trauma, often chronic traumatic experiences during early childhood.

Dissociation—or disconnection from one’s sense of self or environment—can be a response to trauma.

Dissociative identity disorder—a type of dissociative disorder—most often develops during early childhood in kids who are experiencing long-term trauma. This typically involves emotional, physical, and/or sexual abuse; neglect; and highly unpredictable interactions with caregivers.

Why "associated", not "is caused by"? Why "can", not "is"? Why "most often", etc.?

Why such weak language?

Not that it couldn't be weaker.

I vaguely remember McLean getting into some hot water regarding a video they posted about DID, but didn't find anything concrete. Half-remembered anecdote aside, the author seems well-qualified.

C-tier debunk of this position. It's not nothing but it could be a lot better.

Link 2: Psych Central

It occurs in women 9 times more often than in men.

Very interesting statistic, but no citation provided.

Alters can show striking differences. For instance, one alter may speak with a different accent or have a softer way of speaking. They might have different opinions or a different gender identity, and even physical differences — like left- or right-handedness, or the need for a glasses prescription.

That's quite a stark difference here compared to the McLean article. What happened to "alters aren't that noticeable"?

But whatever, these are just interesting tidbits. None of this has anything to do with endogenic plurality. Nothing like "this is the only way to be multiple", no comment whatsoever.

DID is usually associated with adverse experiences in someone’s past and traumatic memories.

Dissociative identity disorder (DID) is a mental health condition with strong links to trauma, especially trauma in childhood.

Bruh. This again?

In fact, the American Psychiatric Association reports that 90% of people with DID have a history of childhood abuse and neglect, based on research from the United States, Canada, and Europe.

Bruh. Seriously? 90%? You know what that leaves, right?

According to your own source, 10% of DID systems are endogenic.

But let's break this down. There's a big difference between the system being endogenic, and the DID being endogenic. This statistic is specifically referring to childhood trauma.

The wording's plenty vague though. This can absolutely be read as completely endogenic DID.

One review article from 2017 about the causes of DID noted that there was relatively little research on the condition to date.

The authors said researchers hadn’t yet investigated potential genetic and epigenetic factors. With epigenetic factors, the experiences and behaviors of your parents and ancestors can influence the function of the genes they pass down to you.

The authors of the review said scientists needed to do more research to investigate whether a person with DID might carry genes that can influence if they develop the condition or not.

This is particularly promising because studies have already shown that genes can influence dissociative disorders in general.

So you're telling me DID might be able to be passed down one or two generations? Wow. Again, this still has nothing to do with endogenic plurality, but I'm really glad I decided to play with this second angle, because it's so much more fun. We're certainly not at intentional self-inflicted DID here, but we are at this point a long way from certainly needing childhood trauma in all cases.

And also the reviewer is a military psychiatrist who specializes in ADHD. So uh. Not bringing our best here.

Link 3: Mayo Clinic

Gotta love an article that's nice and short. This is just a brief summary of a bunch of dissociative disorders. Again, nothing about endogenic plurality.

Starting to run out of things to say about this. This whole post could probably be a fifth the length if I didn't feel like playing on hard mode.

Formerly known as multiple personality disorder, this disorder involves "switching" to other identities. You may feel as if you have two or more people talking or living inside your head. You may feel like you're possessed by other identities.

Each identity may have a unique name, personal history and features. These identities sometimes include differences in voice, gender, mannerisms and even such physical qualities as the need for eyeglasses.

Hey, that reminds me of someone.

There also are differences in how familiar each identity is with the others. Dissociative identity disorder usually also includes bouts of amnesia and often includes times of confused wandering.

Again, McLean looking really odd with its declaration of DID's covertness against great detail like this. However, its author is so far the best qualified. This one just says "Mayo Clinic Staff". Can't even know which of them worked on this. Some of them are psychs, but if any of them specialize in dissociative disorders, it doesn't say so.

Dissociative disorders usually arise as a reaction to shocking, distressing or painful events and help push away difficult memories.

I won't bother quoting even more wishy-washy language because this post is already at an ungodly length (about 1300 words so far) and we're barely a third done. But yeah, suffice to say, no nail-in-the-coffin 100% link to trauma.

Link 4: Rethink

We are a trusted information creator and accredited by the Patient Information Forum (PIF).

Their bold, for once. That's an alarm-ringing corporate phrase if I've ever seen one. Also, first thing on the PIF's website is "balancing the risks and benefits of AI in the production of health information". So this article might've been written by GPT. Awesome. And yeah, a lot of this whole website looks to me like a bunch of interconnected pages with stupidly long articles written by stitching together LLM generations. Does pass GPT0's test though.

This one is so long. I'll take the ten minutes to read through every word, which I don't think @radpocalypse did, just to make sure there's nothing here, but one thing that does catch my eye scrolling down to near the bottom is that they misspelled their first citation.

A quick look at this Carolyn Spring shows a lot being sold and credentials nowhere in sight. Awesome.

So already I don't need to read this. The information here is not at a high level of trustworthiness. It's maybe better than nothing, but seriously, one can and should do better. But I'll read it anyway, just for bonus points. Thanks to AccelaReader for making this bearable.

Many people will experience dissociation at some point in their lives. Lots of different things can cause you to dissociate. For example, you might dissociate when you are very stressed, or after something traumatic has happened to you.

Some of the symptoms of dissociation include the following:

You may have clear multiple identities.

It‘s important to remember that you could have the symptoms of dissociation without a dissociative disorder.

So according to this, multiple identities can be caused by intense but non-traumatic stress, and might not necessarily be a disorder. So, while I admit this is a little bit of a stretch, we're four links in and this is the first mention of plurality in general, so I'll take it. One point for endogenic plurality. (And again, none of this really matters anyway because this is the worst source so far.)

Dissociative identity disorder (DID) is sometimes called ‘Multiple Personality Disorder.

If you have DID you might seem to have 2 or more different identities, called ‘alternate identities.

Two missing closing quotes. Really not a good sign.

They suggest that DID is caused by experiencing severe trauma over a long time in childhood.

Aha! Finally, something concrete against endogenic DID! Too bad it's buried in the worst source yet. If we believed we had DID, we would absolutely not reconsider that based on a sketchy webpage with suboptimal syntax and no credentials.

Ugh, finally done with that one. What a slog.

Link 5: DID Research

Aha! The infamous psych student's blog! That's what Sophie said, anyway. Not taking her word for it though. Let's see what we can find here, independently.

Dissociative identity disorder (DID) is the result of repeated or long-term childhood trauma

Why wasn't this first? First sentence, so crystal clear. No two ways about this, transDID destroyed right out of the gate.

DID cannot form after ages 6-9 because individuals older than these ages have an integrated self identity and history.

Why wasn't this first? It's so plain, so refreshing after four pages of strategic ambiguity. Nothing left here for green. But still no mention of non-disordered plurality.

The author is impressively credentialed but doesn't seem to specialize quite near this area. She's certainly better than most, high above any random Tumblr user talking out of their ass, but the good stuff would be to get a DID specialist to explicitly spell out that endogenic systems are not possible.

Also should make note of this big fat legal disclaimer:

While the author strives to make information on this website as complete, reliable, and accurate as possible, the author makes no claims, promises, guarantees, or warranties about the accuracy, completeness, or adequacy of the contents of this site and expressly disclaims liability for errors and omissions in the contents of this site.

If we did claim to have DID, this would rattle us a little but could ultimately be brushed aside.

Link 6: SANE

As usual, literally nothing about endogenic plurality. I'll just greenmode this.

The majority of people with DID have been through severe trauma in early childhood

And now back to our regularly scheduled nondefinitive language.

Fun fact: highlighting text on this website turns it invisible. Awesome.

A person needs to meet the following criteria to be diagnosed with DID:

- Two or more distinct identities or personality states, each with its own way of thinking and relating. - Amnesia and gaps in the recall of everyday events, personal information or traumatic events. - The experiences are not part of normal cultural or religious practice, or part of childhood imaginary play. For example, a child having an imaginary friend does not mean they have DID. - The symptoms are not because of substance abuse or other medical conditions.

Ah finally, a direct quote from the good ol' DSM. Notice the lack of a trauma requirement.

Funny enough, using only these criteria in isolation, we actually would count as having DID due to our grayout memory gaps when switching. DID is also listed in the dissociative disorders section of the DSM, not the trauma disorders section, so there is no implied criterion there either. However, there still remains the universal criterion of distress, which we do not fulfill. We are quite happy with ourselves.

DID is caused by severe childhood trauma, such as physical, verbal or sexual abuse.

Well, which is it?? Is it a majority association or a direct cause? Why the contradiction? Or is the emphasis on early childhood trauma?

Eh, whatever. Point is, green is once again shut down. But there is still no mention of endogenic plurality anywhere here!!

And no indication of who wrote this article, though the citation for direct cause is a dissociative disorder specialist. Does he actually say that in the cited paper, though?

Dissociative identity disorder (DID) is multifactorial in its etiology. Whereas psychosocial etiologies of DID include developmental traumatization and sociocognitive sequelae, biological factors include trauma-generated neurobiological responses. Biologically derived traits and epigenetic mechanisms are also likely to be at play. At this point, no direct examination of genetics has occurred in DID. However, it is likely to exist, given the genetic link to dissociation in general and in relation to childhood adversity in particular.

I hope you have a dictionary on hand. That sure is a lot of big words that aren't in Firefox's built-in spellchecker. Still, after making sure I got everything, it's clearly not so cut and dry here. And we're back on the "it could be genetic" point.

Tangentially related: I do like the dismissal of the iatrogenic model on the basis of the brain scans.

Neurobiological differences have been demonstrated between dissociative identities within patients with DID and between patients with DID and controls. Given the current evidence, DID as a diagnostic entity cannot be explained as a phenomenon created by iatrogenic influences, suggestibility, malingering, or social role-taking. On the contrary, DID is an empirically robust chronic psychiatric disorder based on neurobiological, cognitive, and interpersonal non-integration as a response to unbearable stress.

Anyway, we're not even on the original page anymore, so I'll call it here. No mention of endogenic plurality, and the citation that claims to dismiss endogenic DID doesn't.

Link 7: NAMI Michigan

While the causes [of DID] are unknown

I'm tired. Aren't you tired?

Treatment for DID consists primarily of psychotherapy with hypnosis.

Yeah I'm calling BS on this one

And no citations on this entire page, nor even the author's name.

Statistics show that DID occurs in 0.01 to 1 percent of the general population.

Research has shown that the average age for the initial development of alters is 5.9 years old.

No sources listed. This is definitely the worst link. Literally on the same level as a rambling Tumblr user in terms of credibility.

Doesn't matter that it says

This disorder is believed to be triggered by physical or sexual abuse in childhood

Couldn't even get this dogshit source to be firm.

This one gets an F.

Link 8: The Psychology Practice

Got scared for a moment there that it said ai. No, that's AL, a name. Also this was written in 2022, so we're definitely safe. Can't actually find any other info on this AL character, but at least we can look up the co-author.

Hm, can't find anything on her, either. Well, at least this is a step up from the previous link. Let's see what it has to say.

According to the Dissociative Identity Research Organisation (2018), DID is formed in childhood due to repeated trauma in early childhood (before age 10) before the personality is fully integrated.

I do like that these later links are direct with this. They don't seem to have a citation for that DIRO, though. Unless...

No. Oh no.

Ok, so this one was written by a couple of clowns who definitely didn't do their homework. Cool. I'm getting tired of humoring awful sources like this, so moving on to the grand finale.

Link 9: NAMI

Wait, this is the same group behind the zero-citation article from Michigan! But that was just Michigan. Maybe the main site can do better.

Ugh, it's just another list of dissociative disorders instead of DID specifically.

The symptoms of a dissociative disorder usually first develop as a response to a traumatic event,

Aren't you tired? Aren't you tired? Aren't you tired?

Often these identities may have unique names, characteristics, mannerisms and voices.

Often? Wow. Sure is a far cry from 5%.

Dissociative disorders are managed through various therapies including: - Psychotherapies such as cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT) and dialectical behavioral therapy (DBT) - Eye movement desensitization and reprocessing (EMDR) - Medications such as antidepressants can treat symptoms of related conditions

No mention of hypnosis, allegedly the primary method of treatment?? (/sarc)

and there was no mention of plurality being exclusive to dissociative disorders

Oh, and no listed authors either.

So, after three thousand words of analysis, all we've come up with are nothing burgers, dogshit, and dogshit nothing burgers. Out of nine links, only one briefly and indirectly touched on endogenic plurality, and it was in favor. Even the argument against the traumaless DID strawman is weak at best. These sources are bad, to put it lightly.

@radpocalypse, if you're reading this, firstly, thank you for powering through your ADHD and dyslexia to read thousands of words dunking on your masterpiece. Secondly, if you have any more sources that you think are backing you, feel free to send them my way. Just uh, maybe read them more closely next time?

And that goes for everyone here. If you think you have a better source, or if I made a mistake or missed something here, I am open to correction. I am open to the idea that I'm wrong and I have some unknown trauma to work through, but I certainly won't go digging unless I have good reason to believe it's there, and I haven't seen any good reason. And if you haven't either, maybe it's time to reconsider your position.

One last thing before I go.

Have you ever actually seen a pro-endo carrd, let alone one cited in standalone? I haven't.

Here's a much longer list of much better sources than yours supporting endogenic plurality compiled by the traumagenic Guardians System. I don't expect you to read anywhere near the whole thing; just pick a few links at random. And yes, while many of them are peer-reviewed papers, some of them are Tumblr posts, but those Tumblr posts cite peer-reviewed papers, so it's all good.

Thanks for reading.

#syscourse #sysconversation

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fatuismooches · 1 month

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Your brain for Star Rail!Dottore omg...

I always think he would've been like Ruan Mei, only more extreme... he's will be pathless at first but if he's under genius society then he'd follow nous...Meta/game play wise he'd be 5 star Ice Nihility or Erudition DPS who focus on break and freeze team (So his good team would have Ruan mei on it because they're both my fav).

Also, since Star Rail doesn't have designated weapons, creative liberties could be taken, no?? (Ratio did use a chalk and a book as weapons, so there's many possibilities for him. Hmmm, Dottore fighting with syringes, or chainsaw, or surgery knife would be nice lololol

His lightcone could be of like Boothill's but instead it's just the creations his segments on a lab (does he still need segments in this universe?we'll never know) and his splash art would be so cool if it were lab centric since most star rail splash art focuses more on scenery.

His phone case....it would be plain boring black-grey-blue color that probablyhave blood splatter on it...and his expression when looking at phone could've be like welt. His texts would consist of talking about how expensive it is the equipment to do experiments these days, or asking the trailblazer to hear his new experiments or just him complaining. And when he visits the astral express, he'd be curious about Pom-Pom and the machinery of the astral express.

If Dottore were ever be a genius society member and got invited to simulated universe collab he would get his own Occurrence and Curio (There's this one curio in divergent universe, a new endgame mode which was a syringe that cause you to go auto for the rest of the game and i thought it was funny lol) I think Dottore's Occurrence would be "The Wise Doctor" and it would give you options something along the lines : You are approached by a figure, a charming doctor who need a volunteer for his bext experiment "Are you willing to help this doctor's experiment" And the choices are :

1. Give in and help the doctor (Your party lose 50% of their HP and given one blessing of 2 star rarity)

2. Refuse the doctor (You will lose 99% of your HP and gain a negative curio)

His curio will either be his mask or the wise doctor's pinion with effects, including: Whenever you enter a domain (up to 3 domains), you lose 10% of your HP. After the curio is destroyed, you will lose 1 Blessing of 3 star rarity. (I THINK his curios will mostly have negative effects, lol)

This is a different section if he's with fragile!reader:

1. Dottore definitely would make an appearance in their lightcone and splash art, maybe them running in the field of flowers whilst dottore follow close behind??? Or maybe them dancing with dottore...that would be cute...

2. Since there's phones and all I really agree with what you said dottore does not care for his phone!! It's reader who teaches him how to use camera and messaging apps and teases how he's a genius but have a hard time keeping up with phone technologies lol

3. If they're playable, meta wise they will have harmony path, wind or ice...their kit would go well with Dottore maybe increasing weakness break efficiency or atk% (kinda like Ruan Mei lol) I would want to make their kit to focus on frozen enemies only but that would make them niche in meta ?? AND THEIR EIDOLONS....oof I imagine if they still have their sickness here it would be them in their comatose state while looking very troubled (like a nightmare) :( but in this happy universe they're just smilling peacefully!!

4. Would see them as the type to be traveling around the cosmos. They love collecting trinkets and gifts from their visit!! Also, they would be a big fan of Robin, me thinks... dragging Dottore to her concerts or just blasting her song in his lab.

5. They would!! Love!! Pom Pom!!! They would much want to take Pom Pom home.

Overall, they're just happy in this universe living their lives to their where they don't have to suffer :((

I have been having the biggest star rail dottore brain rot ever!!! I hope you don't mind me writing it out here!!

(x) YES. He would definitely be more extreme than Ruan Mei (who is also one of my top favs, her and Reader would be besties because I said so! I'm sure Trailblazer would make some catcakes of you and Dottore, which you happily take off their hands. Dottore is unsure of how to feel with the two things constantly stacked on each other and staring at him...)

I also love how unique HSR weapons are - it could quite literally be ANYTHING. I've always imagined Dottore using syringes, for his skill, he'd switch the size, fluid, and quantity of it for an enhanced attack, the mysterious liquid inside anyone's guess. I'm not sure if he could have segments in HSR, just because he was only able to create the segments thanks to having a very good test subject (Scaramouche) so he would need to somehow have an equally good experimentation partner in this universe. If he did though, it'd be amazing - he'd get so much done by sending his other selves to different planets...

His lightcone would be similar to Natasha's - a doctor helping their patient, except in his case, the "doctor" will be doing the opposite. His blood-red eyes would pair well with the blood stains on his hands. For a soft route, Dottore falling asleep on his desk and Reader placing a blanket over him. For an angsty route, Reader being injured and he has to hold your dying body. (Poor Pom-Pom... they'd hide behind a crew member the whole time, in fear Dottore might snatch them up for some experimenting... Even more, they would NOT be amused with you trying to constantly pet them.) And yes! I feel like besides his negative curios, they would be high risk, high reward - you're going to have to prove yourself to him if you want his help!

If you want to be soft, Reader's lightcone would be them flustered as another pair of hands (Dottore) place a carefully woven flower crown on their head. If you want to be angsty, it would be them sickly laying in a bed as Dottore scrambles to do anything to keep them stable. Reader and Dottore's E6 would be like Hanya's and Xueyi's - they hold hands with each other! Except they would be more intimate with each other, they would bring each other's hands closer to their lips for a small kiss. Or perhaps they would have a hand over each other's hearts.

You steal Dottore's phone often. You have like... a dozen games installed on his phone, and although his phone is always on Do Not Disturb, sometimes he scrolls through and just sees tons of notifications from random apps... he texts you as to what the hell you did with his phone and you just beg him to log on and do your dailies. He leaves you on read.

You would love traveling about too. (Kind of like Himeko - she was unable to fulfill her wishes in HI3 but now she can!!) You bring back so many items that you have to use Dottore's storage rooms to fit them all (he's not amused.) You probably even got a Warp Trotter as a pet somehow... OMG AND YOU'RE SO RIGHT ABOUT ROBIN... you have her playlist blasting during research time and he's just... not amused once again!! Reader falls back dramatically into Dottore's arms once they meet her...

I love the pookies dearly...

#smooches talks #dottore love notes <3 #fragile reader <3 #playable reader <3 #oh anon u did this better than i ever could #ATE THIS UP!!!!!!!!#IM SORRY I COULDNT SAY MUCH ABT THE DIV UNI (im a lazy hsr player and have touched divergent uni like 5 times and i hate farming)#speaking of hsr... THE LATEST QUEST WAS SO GOOD AUGHHH #AND THE MARCH EVENT!!!

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be-missed · 11 months

Text

Not Strong Enough (Chap 3)

Jenna Ortega x Fem!Reader

(picture not mine)

Summary: Jenna was visiting her mom in the hospital to drop off the food that will be eaten for the hospital party, but she met a resident surgeon and she thought "God forbid I ran into an accident, but I want her to open me and stitch me up." While the surgeon tries her best to keep her fan girling low-key.

Warning: curse words

A/N: Hey, 3rd chapter in a row. Thank you again for reading and enjoy!

Masterlist

Chap 1 | Chap 2

______________________________________________________________

Chap 3

"Had a fun time in the party, I'm so glad we got to have this celebration for our achievements in our department" Ava said as she dropped her bags beside their front door. Behind her is her wife Beatrice, followed by Y/N and their other friend Camila, who is also a doctor in the Pediatric Department.

"Aww, that really sucks, why do I always get to be left out by you guys." Camila said with a pout on her lips while the other three people inside the house just laughed at her.

"Well sweety, you chose to do your residency in Pedia Department and you love kids, that is why." Beatrice answered her while she went to Ava in their kitchen to help with reheating the premade dinner that they cooked earlier today.

As Y/N and Camila got settled in the living room, they started to catch up with each others life and what stresses them in their department. A little banter over here and there, laughs were echoing throughout the household until Ava called them to go to the dining table to eat.

"Cheers to us noobs to conquering and still being here thriving to do our best, cheers." Y/N tells as she raised their glass and drink their wine.

"I told you having a monthly dinner between the four of us is a great idea, us being free and to catch up with one another." Camila said with a cheeky grin while the other three are just laughing.

"We are all well informed with each others life since we are just literally in the same department unlike you." Beatrice chimed in which makes them laugh, because they love to tease Camila for being the only one that chose pediatrics, but they truly support her since that is where her passion goes but they also love teasing her.

"Not fair guys, I'm getting bullied here, I'm all by myself." Camila teasingly moping and laughing.

"But truly, I really am thankful for the three of you for adopting me in your friend group. I always feel that my home is far but when I'm with you all, home just gets a little bit closer." Y/N tells with a grateful smile on her face.

"Okay, stop with the cheesiness, Halloween is just around the corner so Bea and I planned of a Halloween party, but you know, just for the four of us since we can't really handle big crowds and get overstimulated." Ava proposed and laughs.

"I'm definitely in." Y/N approved and everyone nodded while they enjoy their dinner.

While Y/N is having fun in Ava and Bea's household, Jenna on the other side is facing her mom with the questions that she expected to be asked.

"Well?" Natalie asked Jenna with her left hand on her hip.

"She is new and she looks fun, what is wrong with having a new friend right?" Jenna answered.

Natalie looked at her daughter with questioning eyes, not fully believing what her daughter answered, but, she won't push through, she doesn't want to rush and pressure her daughter.

"Okay, I believe in you. But don't pull that stunt on me again mija, I am a nurse not an actress." Natalie answered with a smile and kissed her daughter's forehead as she leaves Jenna's room.

---

Sun goes up so then another day arrived. The beams of light never shined so bright for Y/N because today is her day-off, which means she can just lay-down and just spend the rest of her day snuggling her pillow and ordering a whole pizza for dinner just to binge watch Brooklyn 99 for the nth time.

BUT. There is a big but that comes to her mind. If they will have a costume party, that means that she needs to buy a costume for herself, because if she did not, Ava will totally gonna punch her face, Camila will kick her in the stomach, and Beatrice will gonna Aikido her. So yes, what she planned was never gonna happen.

Y/N rolled over on her bed until her feet falls and touches the ground, and tries to push her body to stand up. She is trying so hard, looking like a baby that wants to stand up and just walk, and after fighting her own for a second, she got the chance to stand up and scream.

Screaming, that was therapeutic for Y/N, you just scream and all the tension inside your body will somehow get out. For her it is good, but for her neighbors, probably no.

Finding some clothes and going outside to her car, she received a notification.

Fr Jenna:

Thank you again for yesterday.

To Jenna:

No worries. You can text me or call me if you need something :D.

Fr Jenna:

Wow, that is something that I will hold on to ;)

And with that, Y/N smashed her head in her steering wheel, asking WHY OH WHY, Jenna just sent her a wink. A FUCKING WINK. It's just a wink but her heart can't seem to follow the right rhythm for it to function naturally.

Breathing in, Breathing out. A minute of breathing exercise helped Y/N to pull herself together and starts her car to go to the mall.

Traffic lights turned from green to red from red to green, driving around corners and street while listening to NIKI, Y/N arrived at the mall and had one thing in mind; to buy a dress just like Mavis from Hotel Transylvania.

She loved that movie, that is probably one of her comfort movie. So, on the drive to the mall, she sets her mind on finding a black dress, a red and black striped thigh and some pair of fangs.

Going in and out of different stores, she got to buy the dress and the fangs, but those damn red and black striped thighs are surely nowhere to be found. Going down the escalator, she saw a crowd of people that is following a person, with their cellphones out, flashes from their phone camera on, a paper to sign on.

Y/N thinks that it must be a pain in the ass to be in the middle of a crowd and getting huddled at. Trying to find the person that causes a crowd, she stops on the foot of the escalator and tried to tip on her toes and found her target.

While seeing the person that was in the middle she thought "Wow, she is so small in the middle, with her big ass headphones? Damn she might not here a thing, and that fit, she knows how to dress." Slowly, her eyes trail from the girl's outfit and focused on her face that was hidden with those bangs.

And Y/N realised, like she got hit by a truck, struck by lighting, and thrown in an ice bath. HOLY SHIT IT IS JENNA YOU DUMBASS. Y/N hurriedly went and followed the crowd yelling Jenna's name.

"JENNA..... JEEENNNAAAA." Y/N realised that that was a dumb move, everyone calling Jenna. So the next thing that Y/N did is to thread along in the crowd until she is close enough to touch Jenna.

But Jenna is inside her head thinking, she just wants to chill and relax by the roof top in the mall, reading a book that she just bought so she could have a relaxing day. But then a person noticed her and the news that Jenna Ortega was in the building spread like a wildfire until she builds a crowd that is now huddling her.

All Jenna wanted was some peace. She just wants to do the things that she did in the past, but it looks like she also can't have that now. Being so much in her head, she never realised that Y/N was totally yelling at her and calling her, not until she felt someone tugged at her elbow, and she really tried to be polite, but tugging her elbow was her last straw. So she looked up with her brow meeting at the end and ready to throw some bad looks to the person that just tugged her.

That's when she realised that it was you. The angry face and her eyes that holds a look that can kill slowly disappear. Her eyes are now looking at you with such tender and softness, her lips are holding a sad smile, and her brows never looked so calm. So what she did was to stop on her tracks to focus on you more.

"You wanna get out?" Y/N asked, while Jenna just nodded.

Y/N graced Jenna with a bright smile and asked "Think you can run?" and without waiting for Jenna's answer, Y/N tugged Jenna's hands as they started to run away from the crowd and went inside the department store which where they try to lose the people that is trying to follow Jenna.

Even though they are out of breath, smiles was plastered in their faces, hands are tightly held with each other and with every passing floor that they run to, they got into a secluded place of the store and got the chance to take a little rest and chase their breaths.

Y/N was the one to break the silence "Well that was fun." and she handed Jenna a handkerchief that was neatly folded inside her back pocket while she swiped her own sweat with another handkerchief that she got from her front pocket.

Jenna accepted the handkerchief and helped herself "Always ready. huh?" and smirked, while Y/N answered "Yup, we never know when a pretty lady needs one, right?" and winked at Jenna.

AND DAMN, Jenna knows that she is blushing so she just kept on blotting her face.

"Do you have a ride home? I can drop you by if you want." Y/N kindly offered, and Jenna is too tired to defy so she just nodded and said "Yes please."

---

While in the car, the album that Y/N played earlier continued to help them blur out the noise from the outside.

"Thank you for earlier, I was just trying to relax then everything got out of hand and then one moment I was alone the I got crowded by a lot of people and I kind of just shut down and blurred my environment." Looking at y/N's side profile with a sad look on her face.

"Hey now, don't be hard on yourself. It's fine and you're welcome. I don't know how you fully feel about the situation that happened earlier but I am right here to listen to it and to understand you okay? I'm here to listen. It's okay to blur things out when everything got out of hand." Y/N answered with a soft smile plastered on her face.

Red light was indicated by the traffic light and that got Y/N a chance to reach for Jenna's hand and squeeze it without looking at her.

Jenna smiled, thankful not only for what Y/N did earlier but for what she also said. Because it sometimes irritates her when someone tells her "I know and I understand your situation" because they just don't. Jenna believed that even if we are faced with the exact same thing in our life, it doesn't mean that we get to experience it just the same. This is where Jenna's understanding the life of other people is not as easy or hard as hers, we have different perspective in life and how we view things.

A comfortable silence once again situated in the air not until Jenna hears Y/N humming to the song that is playing that is slowly turning into mumbled lyrics.

"So why can't you for once, disregard the world and run to what you know is real." Y/N sang without a care in her mind and not noticing that Jenna is now staring at her.

"Take a chance with me... take a chance with me." Y?N sang with such desperation that got Jenna thinking "who the hell is she pertaining that to?"

The car suddenly breaks and Y/N looked at Jenna "Well, we arrived at our destination."

That got Jenna sad, since it means no Y/N beside her.

"Thank you again for earlier and driving me home. I can't think of anything to repay your kindness." Jenna said shyly.

"Hey, don't mind it, we are friends, and I will totally help you whenever you need me." Y/N said, which hurt Jenna slight because Y/N just used the word "friend" but that is a good start isn't it?

"Okay let's stop moping and what if you repay me by going to a concert with me this coming weekend?" Y/N hopefully asked Jenna. Asking her in a concert might be to dangerous since there are a lot of people that will notice them, but taking a risk isn't bad thing, right?

Jenna smirked and nodded her head "Sure, absolutely, I would love to join you."

Y/N went out of her side and went to Jenna's side to open her car door "This way m'lady" Y/N said with a curtsy that made Jenna laugh.

"Hmm, a gentle woman who open doors and gives me a curtsy huh." Jenna teased while Y/N answered "Well this probably will never get out of style huh?" with a grin.

"Oh yeah? You doing some old stuff like curtsy get you girls? Is that why you are still driving a stick?" Jenna teased with a laugh and Y/N acted hurt and answered "Why would you say that? I love my car and it makes me feel like I'm racing just like in Fast and the Furious."

They walked to the Ortega's front door and stand in front of each other.

Jenna broke the silence "Thank you again." and her pointer finger silently reached for Y/N's pointer finger, which Y/N decided to give and they intertwined it with each other.

With Y/N's other hand, she swats the flying hair away from Jenna's face and tell her "Again, if it is for you, I'll always be there." and smiles.

"That's fucking cheesy."

Jenna and Y/N heard from their side and saw Aliyah with a teasing face. The both of them didn't noticed that the door opened just a few seconds after they got situated in the front door.

Jenna immediately closed their front door and yelled "WHAT THE HELL ALIYAH."

Y/N just laughed and said "I'm going now, have some rest." and waved going to her car.

Jenna then yelled "Text me when you got home and stay safe!"

Jenna stayed at their front porch playing with her finger that touched Y/N not knowing that Y/N is also doing the same inside of her car.

Y/N smiled at herself and screams inside her car, not because she is stressed but she is filled with happiness that was caused by this girl whom she just dropped off.

Jenna entered their living room and yelled "ALIYAH YOU ARE SO DEAD."

______________________________________________________________

Chap 4

A/N: Thanks for reading. Comments and suggestions are appreciated! Hope you enjoyed the story and you can click this song title to listen to the song Take A Chance With Me by NIKI.

#jenna ortega x y/n #jenna ortega x you #jenna ortega x fem!reader #jenna ortega x reader #NotStrongEnough #fiction #fanfic #jenna ortega imagine #wednesday addams imagine #tara carpenter x reader

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