#guy who is going to open this software all of 1 time and then never again

[goldengodcannibal]

I pulled the trigger and bought screenwriting software.

[staylovesmiley]

Collision— Chapter 1

₊˚⊹ᰔ Pairing; Stray Kids x afab!reader

₊˚⊹ᰔ ₊˚⊹ᰔ Summary; You’ve known him for years but you never would have guessed the charming guy you’ve been online gaming with has been an idol this whole time. (masterlist here)

₊˚⊹ᰔ ₊˚⊹ᰔ ₊˚⊹ᰔ Warnings; implied afab reader (only they/them pronouns used for reader), mild angst?, pls I haven’t written fanfics since 2018 patience and kindness is appreciated

It was already getting late, the sun having set hours before and the soft sounds of the city’s night life stirred out his bedroom window. Felix had just returned from a long day of schedules but was finding it hard to wind down now that he was left to his own devices. He had already reached out in the group chat to see if any of the members wanted to keep him company only for them to turn him down in favor of sleep, working on things in the studio, or even extra practice time which didn’t sound appealing to the blonde at this point in time. Needing something to distract himself from his idol self, Felix sat at his desk and began firing up a familiar program.

A soft lullaby-like melody began to drift into his headphones as he adjusted them on his head, quickly logging into the popular open world game as the opening theme soothed some of the restlessness he had been feeling since returning home. At first he was just going to play solo but curiosity got the better of him and he decided to pull up his friends list just to see who out of his gaming buddies might be online. To his surprise he saw one of them, a player that went by the name Starlight, on and decided to send over the co-op request.

Just as the request went through he heard the familiar chime of a call coming through on his discord. Quickly, Felix turned on his voice distortion software and answered the call with an amused smirk pulling at his lips. “Now, what are you doing up so late Star?” He questioned, listening to their laughter ring through the line. “It may be late for you but I’m actually on my lunch break at the moment, sir.” They responded in a teasing manner. He laughed sheepishly in returned. “You caught me there- was having trouble sleeping after work so I thought I’d game for a bit.”

Star hummed in understanding. “What time is it over there, like midnight right?” “Half past eleven, but you were close.” The Aussie cringed slightly at the sound of his voice echoing slightly in his ears with the distortion. For the safety of his privacy he always made sure to use a voice changer when on calls with his online friends, and never accepted video calls despite the curiosity a lot of them had as to what he looked like behind the screen. Star was one of the only ones to never push him for any photos or a video chat. He appreciated them for respecting his boundaries, though it would have been hypocritical of them since they also refused to show themselves though to his knowledge they didn’t go as far as to distort their voice in any way. “So, got anything in particular you wanna do or just sorta fuck around for a bit? I could use some help farming for Wanderer you know~” Their voice in a sing-song tone at the end. Chuckling at them, Felix agreed to help them out and quickly followed their lead in game.

About an hour later, their game cut short due to his companions lunch break ending. “Sorry bud- I’ll have to catch you some other time and I can repay the favor! You know how much I hate farming solo so this was a big help.” He could hear their smile in their voice, wearing what he assumed was a matching expression as he shrugged though he knew they wouldn’t be able to see it. “It’s no big deal, really. I’m glad we could keep each other company. I should probably head to bed myself-“ “Oh! Before I go I wanted to tell you…I’m actually going to be in your neck of the woods soon so maybe we can play some in the same timezone for once!” Felix paused for a beat. They were coming to Korea? All of his gaming buddies knew where he lived, though that and the fact he is originally from Australia was as far into his personal life as he was comfortable going with any of them.

Starlight had been one of his longest Genshin friends, having started playing around the same time as him they had met in a server for newbies to the game and hit it off quickly. The thought of them being so close was exciting yet a bit nerve wracking. Curiosity at the reason for their trip from the states to South Korea itched in his mind. “Oh really? What’s bringing you all the way to Korea?” Star squealed a litte, and he could lightly hear the sound of what he assumed was their feet tapping at the floor with excitement. “Well- I’ve been wanting to make a trip there for a while….not to sound cliche or anything but I’ve been a huge fan of kpop and kdrama since I was in like- middle school and I’ve never traveled outside of the states before so it seemed like a fun place to start.” Felix had to keep himself from choking on nothing. A fan? Of kpop- they had never mentioned this to him before in the years they had been online friends. His mind began to wonder. What groups did they like? Did they know about Stray Kids? What if they were a Stay? He felt his heartbeat quicken and reflexively put his fingers to his pulse and took a deep breath to calm himself. “Oh that’s cool! Any plans for when you get here?” He questioned, finally feeling a bit calmer. This was fine, the odds they would be stay were slim, and besides there was no way for them to know who it was they had really been playing with this whole time as he himself went through multiple precautions to hide his identity online. Then, he felt his worlds colliding with a single string of words from their lips. “Actually, yeah! One of the groups I’m a fan of is having a concert I was able to snag tickets for! Not sure if you’ve heard of them but they are pretty big these days, Stray Kids?” His eyes felt comically huge and the blonde thought he may faint. “Stray Kids?” Was all that he could muster as a response, throat suddenly very dry. “Yeah! They are like so incredibly talented. I wasn’t able to see them when they came here on tour last so I couldn’t pass up the opportunity after I finally decided to book a trip to Korea and they happened to be holding a concert at the same time. I’m so excited! But- oh i really gotta go or I’m gonna be late getting back from lunch. I’ll talk to you later okay?” Felix blinked a few times before fully registering their words. “Oh uh- yeah definitely. Talk to you later Stay- Star! Bye Star!” And with that he abruptly ended the call. Fuck. He called them Stay- hopefully they didn’t catch it in their haste to get back to work. His next conversation was sure to be interesting if they had happened to hear him….

author’s note: I’m super rusty at writing so I hope this is okay…feedback is welcome and encouraged! I started this cause it has been super slow at work and I’ve personally never read a fic having to do with reader and Felix being genshin co-op buddies and I thought it would be a fun concept (as a genshin player myself lol) Again, I hope those of you reading enjoyed it and I’m looking forward to updating soon. ᕱᕱ⊹ ࣪ ˖

[sleepyking]

Exactly one person said they wanted this so-

(Might find more eventually idk)

BILL/CIPHER/BILL CIPHER - EYE OF PROVIDENCE WIKI

ALEX/HIRSCH - FLANNEL GOOGLE SEARCH

GRAVITY FALLS - “NEVER HEARD OF IT”

MCGUCKET/FIDDLEFORD - COTTONEYE JOE

PINES - “A GOOD FAMILY TREE”

DISNEY - “RAT.GIF CENSORED FOR YOUR PROTECTION”

BOOK OF BILL - “HIDE IT UNDER SHIRT DURING PLEDGE OF ALLEGIANCE”

EUCLID/SCALENE/SCRIMBLES - “LIFE FORM NOT FOUND”

EUCLYDIA - “DIMENSION NOT FOUND”

TANTRUM - BILL & TIME BABY CONVERSATION

TRIANGLE - “TRI HARDER”

WHO ARE YOU - “I COULD ASK YOU THE SAME QUESTION”

PORTAL - “PORTAL.EXE HAS BEEN DELETED. I BET YOU COULD BUILD ONE”

DEATH - “LIFE’S GOTH COUSIN”

LIFE - “72% COMPLETE. NOW LOADING: DEATH”

CLONE - PAPERJAM DIPPER, SUBTITLE: HERE, HE’S YOUR PROBLEM NOW! JUST KEEP THIS GUY AWAY FROM LIQUIDS!

SHAPE/GREECE - ANCIENT GREECE ARTICLE

T J ECKLEBURG - “NEVER SAY THAT NAME AGAIN”

BYE GOLD - “BYE!’

YOURE INSANE - “SURE I AM WHATS YOUR POINT?”

AXOLOTL - “YOU ASK ALOTL QUESTIONS”

WEIRDMAGEDDON - NEWS ARTICLE

FORGET THE PAST - COLOR CIPHER: TWO DIMENSIONS, TO AND FRO. YOU ALWAYS NOW WHICH WAY TO GO. IF YOU’RE LOST DONT BE AFRIAD, IN EUCLYDIA YOU’VE GOT IT MADE. RUN TOO FAR TO RIGHT OF FAME, YOU’LL APPEAR ON LEFT AGAIN. JUMO TOO HIGH DONT CRY OR FRET, YOU’LL POP UP FROM THE GROUND, I BET. IN THIS SPACE THERE IS NO FEAR, LOVED ONES WILL BE EVER NEAR, ROLES AND RULES ALWAYS CLEAR. EUCLYDIA, WE HOLD YOU DEAR.”

RIDDLE - “WOULD YOU LIKE TO PLAY A GAME?”

BLIND EYE - EYE EXAM; “THEY’LL SEE, THEY’LL ALL SEE.” “EUCLYDIAN DEPARTMENT OF VISION SUPERVISION.”

THEYLL (ALL) SEE - “IS SEEING BELIEVING?”

BABY - PREGNANCY SCAN

QUESTION - ANSWER

ANSWER - QUESTION

HOLOGRAM - UNIVERSE

WELL WELL WELL BEING - “PATIENT FILE: BILL CIPHER. GREATEST LOVE: HIMSELF. GREATEST FEAR: HIMSELF.” “ART THERAPY NOTES: ALL HE DRAWS ARE RED AND BLUE TRIANGLES.” “PATIENT’S ODD PHOBIAS: 3D GLASSES, VENETIAN BLINDS, TV STATIC.”

REALITY - “IS AN ILLUSION”

NAITSUF - SOUL CONTRACT. “YOU KILLED US ALL. REMEMBER US.” “SOMEONE HELP. THE MURDER’S NAME IS BILL.”

VALLIS CINERIS - “WHY DID YOU DO IT?” STATIC!SCALENE AND STATIC!EUCLID HOLDING LITTLE BILLY

STANLEY PINES - BRASS KNUCKLES GOOGLE SEARCH. GOLD CHAINS FOR OLD MEN GOOGLE SEARCH. DOGS PLAYING POKER GOOGLE SEARCH. 8-BALL CANE GOOGLE SEARCH. MALE GIRDIE GOOGLE SEARCH. SHRINER FEX GOOGLE SEARCH. COLONEL SANDERS TIE. WHEEL OF FAME; “HOW HE BEAT ME” CHANGES.

DIPPER - LETTERS TO DIPPER FROM BILL, CHANGES

MABEL - STICKERS, GRADUALLY ADD; “LAB NOW FULLY MABELIZED”

WADDLES - PIG PLACEMENT WEBSITE

HELP ME/GOD/SAVE ME - VIDEO OF BILL STATUE

SEASON 3 - SEASON 2

SEASON 2 - SEASON 1

SEASON 1 - SEASON -1: ANTIGRAVITY FALLS

SEASON -2 - SEASON 1

SEASON -3 - SEASON 2

JOURNAL 3 - THE JOURNAL FOR ME

TOBY DETERMINED - RESTRAINING ORDER

DEER TEETH - “FOR YOU, KID!”

PACIFICA - LETTER FROM PACIFICA

RIDDLE - “WOULD YOU LIKE TO PLAY A GAME?”

YES - “WHATS MCGUCKET’S FAVORITE SODA?”

MOUNTAIN DONT - “WHATS A MEDIEVAL HOMONYM?”

LIAR LYRE - “THE 20TH INGREDIENT OF ANTI-CIPHERIZING TONIC?”

HAROLDS RAMBLINGS - “HOW IS CLOWN REPELLANT MADE?”

UNION MADE - “BILL’S GOVT FILE NUMBER?”

29121239168518 - “WHO COMES FROM ZIMTREX 5?”

GREBLEY HEMBERDRECK - “WHATS ON BILLS FLAG?”

RAT - “THURBURT’S NUMBER?”

3466554 - “WHAT LEAVES A THIN LINE IN THE SHOW?”

TINSEL SNAKE - “THE 6TH OPTION ON BILL’S EDITING SOFTWARE?”

TORTURE MENTALLY - “NAME AN UNPRONOUNCABLE WIZARD”

XGQRTHX - “WHERE DO TRI ANGLES COME FROM?”

333 SUNDAPPLE LANE, COZY CREEK, IL, 60714-94611 - “BILL CIPHER’S LAWYER?”

MULTILEVEL MARK - “WHO DEFEATED SILA BIRCHTREE--?”

EMMALINE BUTTERNUBINS - “YOU’VE EARNED A TREAT! ENTER ‘DISPENSE MY TREAT’ TO DOWNLOAD”

DISPENSE MY TREAT - DOWNLOADS ZIP FILE BILLS FILES DO NOT OPEN!!.ZIP

FORTNITE - “LIFE PRIVELAGES REVOKED. NOW REALEASING POISON GAS.”

DUCKTECTIVE - “DUCKTECTIVE STARS IN “LOVE, QUACKTUALLY” COMING TO: “OI, THIS IS COCKNEY, INNIT?” THIS FALL”

BLENDIN - “TIME AGENT LOST AND PRESUMED INCOMPETENT”

GIDEON - AWFUL RECORDING OF GIDEON HUMMING

ROBBIE - MESSAGES BETWEEN HIM AND HIS FRIEND GROUP

ABUELITA - BEST VACUUM FOR WALLS AND CEILINGS YOUTUBE VIDEO

MASON - SCRACTH PAPER DIPPER WROTE ANAGRAMS ON

CRYPTOGRAM CODEX - DOWNLOADS ZIP FILE CRYPTOGRAM CODEX.ZIP

BOOBERRY - QUESTION MARK MADE OF WORDS, TITLE “THE MEANING OF LIFE”

LOVE - AUDIO BOOK OF “TABITHA LUSTHEART”

GOODNIGHT SALLY - BILL SHIRT, “KEEP ON POSSESSIN’”

CURSED - FIND OUT YOURSELF, I DONT EVEN KNOW HOW TO BEGIN EXPLAINING IT

TITANS BLOOD - “HOOT HOOT. PASSWORD PLEASE”

CURSE WITTEBANE - BILL CIPHER OUIJI BOARD(?)

PLATINUM PAZ - PACIFICA’S DREAM

VIRUS - THEPLAGUE.PDF

ADASTRAPERASPERA - JOURNAL PAGE TITLED CIPHER’S CORPSE?

GUN - “OH YES OH YES OH YES THEY BOTH”

OH YES THEY BOTH - “REACHED FOR”

SORRY - PICTURE OF FORD AND MCGUCKET WHEN THEY WERE YOUNGER

SPOOKY - AUDIOBOOK OF “SPOOKEMUPS”

SKELETON - “THE ONE WITH THE SWORD! HE FOUND YOU!”

MYSTERY - “?”

MYSTERY SHACK - CONFUSION HILL GOOGLE SEARCH

BLACKSHEEP - BILL BASICALLY DOES DRUG DEALING

BAAAA - “LETS RISE FROM THE GRAVE, LETS WALK IN OUR SLEEP. WHAT GOOD IS A SHEPERD WITHOUT ANY SHEEP? WE’LL START AT THE END UNTIL WE BEGIN. THERE’S ROOM IN MY THRONE, IT’S TIME TO FIT IN.”

CARD - BILL’S BUSINESS(? I ASSUME?) CARD

IRREGULAR - BILL MUGSHOTS

THERAPRISM - “IN CASE OF EMERGENCY, DO NOT USE ELEVATORS” SIGN

DIPPY FRESH - REDDIT NOSTALGIA??

OROBOROUS - LOST JOURNAL 3 PAGES ABOUT THE AXOLOTL

SOOS - LETTERS WRITTEN BY SOOS

STANFORD/FORD/SIXER - FORD’S MEDICAL REPORT

Lmk if you’d like to see the pictures from the zip files:))

Anyways my soul belongs to Bill Cipher now

[kalianos]

It is a little past midnight. Have brainworms.

god I remember when windows 8 came out, immediately bought and installed it to troubleshoot Intuit Pro-Series. I was a chaotic force for good in some weird ways back then. Also Ironically working for Intuit was the first time I stopped hanging out in online spaces. ANYWAY!

Higher level techs were spreading the word that neither program would work on it. ProSeries and Lacerte (Corpo Tax Software) weren't built to handle Mobile Tablets. Day 1 of tax season that year and I had to walk a tax preparer installing pro-series on a windows tablet.

The Higher tech was confused as hell how I did it....apparently they couldn't understand how windows would just interpret the finger touch press as a mouse click. Now to right click, that was moon magic to me back then. Though I think they just wanted a mobile way to make tax sheets and input data then just slam it over to their desktop in the office/at home. You would be amazed how many people had this tax preparer software on their home computers. Hell I remember someone who had this expensive stuff and bought it every year just to do their own taxes and some of their friends.

Also obligatory, fuck Intuit. Never use Turbotax or H&R block to file what can be done for free. I gave away so much free stuff when I was in Turbotax even though I knew they were doing it on purpose to bait people to stay in their ecosystem before they "shut down" our ability to give out stuff for free. You can only word things in so many ways to avoid getting nabbed by the monitor police.

:V Call centers man, we had a department in one corner of this open office floor plan dedicated to monitoring us, recording our calls, and making notes on anything we did.

Randomly remembered this when someone was bringing up how Windows 11 wasn't the worst Windows OS and people were jumping on how Windows 8 was terrible and windows vista doesn't work on low powered systems. (Hey! Let's ship an OS that works best at minimum 2gb of ram! On systems that barely had 512mb! Because that was listed minimum spec. What Could Go Wrong?)

Double fun irony. That call center job was how I ended up making friends, learning more social skills, accidentally stealing someone else's girlfriend by being more outgoing and out there. Discovering the joy of dating someone who used to be a runway model and artist in new york who was more than a little obsessed with sucking dick. Older women man...definitely confirmed.

The downsides of having said person be your girlfriend when you are an immature little shit of a man and there was a good....seven year gap I think in our ages? Then again she was on Instagram constantly after me with a new guy on her shoulder every month after that...so minor gold star for being the longest relationship?

AAaaaaaaaaand figuring out the age old problem of "YOU SHOULD NEVER ROOM WITH SOMEONE YOU WERE FRIENDS WITH IN HIGH SCHOOL" due to the whole....situation that made my last year of freedom a descent into hell and depression that took almost a year and a half to escape. You know like, you friend is leaving the military...that he asked you to join up with him in....and you get dumped out leading to two year depression spiral where you took a call center job out of desperation to do SOMETHING with your life before you wasted away into a worthless pile of shit.

ONLY for him to show back up, joining the National Guard, and after apartment hunting for less than a week shooting down all your suggestions and saying we need to get this luxury 2 bedroom apartment that just opened up in this brand new apartment complex which..pricey, and doesn't include utilities. :D WHAT COULD GO WRONG!? Hey turns out....food costs money.

Walking in from work one day planning on changing to go out with friends to a bar only to walk into a big fat shirtless old guy sitting on your couch. Having to shoo said friends away from the door from the master bedroom. Only to find out hours later that it was your roomate/bestfriends dad who was now...crashing on your couch for a while?

Also not paying the bills. Getting a GI Bill to go to a mildly scammy tech school to learn HVAC and then...not...doing that....and basically flat out not getting a job. I can not stress how pissed off and stressed out I was for an entire year straight. My natural light brown/blonde streak in my hair got a few white hairs in it from that experience.

Though I am not going to lie it was a wonderful experience. KNOWING that yet again...as I was paying for half the rent, the electric, the internet, I THINK there was a gas bill as well? $100 easy a month on electric in 2012 was kinda hell for my area but oh well. KNOWING that he came to me saying he couldn't pay the water bill. So I needed to cover it. And me pulling a Luane from King of the Hill moment. I paid my fair share, I can live without water for a bit. (I was already having to drive to my parents house every week to do laundry sooooo....yeah we didn't have a washer and dryer for most of the year.)

THE HILARIOUS THRILL OF JOY I FELT WHEN I LEARNED ON MY DAY OFF AS MY ROOMMATE COMES IN HALF COVERED IN SOAP FROM HIS SHOWER TO TELL ME THE WATER WAS SHUT OFF! AHAAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA. Schadenfreude. Justified.

The amount of times I had to cover all the bills and the Rent...sometimes completely in a 12 month lease was hellish.

So hellish I somehow managed my money to not go into debt back then. Instead I almost to the Penny Zero'd out myself. Including renting the Uhaul to transport my stuff back into my parents house.

OH and him running to the office to grab the deposit money and just leaving with it to buy an engagement ring. That also sucked. Not like I didn't know where a lot of the money was dissapearing to. When you hear stories from friends about him going to a certain fake Australian restaurant and tipping the waitress personally over $100....in 2012. And constantly making us go back to that restaurant to specifically get her and tip her more money.

.....ah memories. Oh yeah and I got invited to a threesome around that time. Probably should have said yes since I knew them but oh well.

And to think I wondered when I was half my age if I would even survive up today. All the things I would have missed out on experiencing. Never was suicidal. Just genuine curiosity in some morbid fashion if I would someone how just be able to live as my crazy stunted self.

....We own a mower now. We have to fix a few more things on it and the tires definitely need to be replaced but it mows better. And now my girlfriend doesn't need to drive her parent's mower down the highway just so we can cut the lawn. It was worth it for piece of mind.

A handful of people I went to school with have apparently tried to reach out to me a few times. At least one of them died a month after doing so. Never opened that message to find out what they said and that was about a decade ago now. We didn't interact much but I am pretty sure he just thought I was annoying dumbass. Wonder if I should completely erase that.

Think I'll title this brainworms or something. I kinda just let my fingers typed whatever came to mind. This was fun.

:V May you not be bored to death if for some reason you read this. I should add a cut not to take up space. Yis yis.

[sibyl-of-space]

Troubleshooting & repair of a DIFFERENT old camcorder - audio & power issues - part 1

If there is one thing about me it is that I love old camcorders.

Device: JVC GR-250U MiniDV Camcorder

Symptoms: Issues charging, "Unit in Safeguard Mode" warning, unable to rewind, audio playback cuts in & out on inner speakers/AV out (FireWire transfer fine)

Service Manual: https://elektrotanya.com/jvc_gr_d250.rar/download.html#dl

TL;DR: Power stuff mostly handled, audio stuff not handled, I hate soldering tiny micro components

Well this camcorder actually started borking it about 2 years ago and I only now could be bothered to open it up and try and figure out what's up. First things first, I focused on the power issues, because I realized there's a chance the audio issue is a result of the power issues. Power issues do all sorts of stuff. You never know.

Now that I have a multimeter the first steps I took were:

Confirmed A/C adapter is outputting the voltage it's supposed to (confirmed)

Opened it up - this was a nightmare, I might make a teardown video at some point to walk people through it because it was SO annoying even WITH the schematics PDF

Tried to confirm voltages on various parts of the board (this was difficult because the circuits are really complicated and the schematic diagrams are A Lot, but it looked to me like for the most part everything was getting the expected voltages when powered on)

At this point I kinda got stuck so I did the tried and true method of "watch some videos of people who know what the fuck they're doing troubleshooting a similar piece of technology" and found this -

First off, I am jealous about how much easier that camcorder is to tear down than mine was, but anyway. In this case, the issue was a blown fuse. I realized I hadn't even thought to check or look for fuses on my camcorder, so I did that.

And sure enough: the first fuse I saw in big yellow letters labeled on the circuit board, F6001, when I tested across it there was no continuity. Looking at the schematics sheet this fuse is like the first point of failure right off the main power before it goes to just about every other part of the device, including and especially the battery, so that would explain most of the issues I've had with powering it. It also explains why the software stuff worked fine but it would fail when it had to do something mechanically taxing like rewinding a tape - bigger power draw, I imagine.

ANYWAY, just like the guy in the video, I decided I should just try to jumper across it to make it work. I was very idealistic at this time and thought if it worked I could order a replacement fuse and then properly install that.

I had not yet learned how much of a fucking nightmare soldering this stupid thing was going to be.

After 3 hours of my life that I will never get back, I have the ugliest solder job known to man, and have melted several adjacent components, but luckily not damaged them:

Perhaps you don't have a good sense for just how infuriatingly tiny this stupid thing is. Here is my thumb for scale.

I know the picture is blurry as hell. My phone didn't want to zoom in this much because of how freaking tiny this stupid shit is. Anyway. It's fine. I did it. Somehow. Eventually. Very, very eventually.

Verifying the jump was also a pain because there are absolutely no obvious connection points immediately after the fuse on this side of the board, and I cannot emphasize enough how annoying it is to take this circuit board out and access the backside, but whatever, it's fine, I found a capacitor on the backside that worked as a point to test the connection and was able to verify on like my 3rd fucking attempt that I actually soldered across the dumb thing.

I am absolutely not replacing this with another fuse. If it gets overloaded and explodes at some point that's just the will of the gods.

ANYWAY, once that was done I put it mostly back together to test it out. And I am actually pleased to report the power issues are much better. If it's plugged into the A/C directly there are no issues, and even on battery power it seems to charge more, hold a charge better, and give me the "UNIT IN SAFEGUARD MODE" error way less frequently. I have still gotten the error, but I wonder if that will go away if I get a new battery or just do a full battery charge + drain to 0 cycle a couple times. It's much more usable now which is good.

Unfortunately this did not solve the audio issue. I am going to have to learn a lot more about reading schematic sheets to figure out the audio issue. One hint I have is that looking at the outputs from the audio chip, the outputs for the speaker and the A/V out ARE COMPLETELY SEPARATE PINS AND CIRCUITS. Which means since I am getting the same symptom on both, the issue lies somewhere between reading from the tape and getting to that audio chip, in all likelihood.

I will further troubleshoot the audio issue another day. For today I have had enough with this stupid tiny circuit board and its dumb small components.

[doctorglasgowart]

Do you have names for any of the new parents?

I do. I'll give you a rundown of what each of them do as well.

Cricket's dad is named Johannes, and is one of the main investigative journalists at the Key Manati Horn, the island's newspaper. He expects a lot of Cricket because he sees how dutiful and intelligent his son is. He likes to collect rare first-edition classic novels.

Cricket's mom is named Emily, and is the meteorologist for KMTV, the island's news station. Her peppy demeanor has endeared her to the island's population. She enjoys crocheting.

Bee's dad is named Arturo, and he's the only honest car mechanic in all of Key Manati, which gets him more than enough business to make up for not screwing people over. He's the picture of "loving what you do and you'll never work a day in your life", as he loves to fuck around with cars.

Bee's mom is named Carmen, and she's a stylist. She's pretty insightful and chatty, so getting your hair or nails done by her is practically getting a free therapy session as well. She likes going out dancing with her husband and trashy telenovelas.

Bee's grandma is named Maria. She was a nurse for decades, but is retired now. Her husband died a while ago, but she still wears her wedding ring and isn't looking for anyone new I'm afraid. Her main hobby used to be quilting, but Bee got her into video games and now she's become the scourge of the online shooter scene.

Vanitas' dad is named Mortis. He's Cronus' #1 thug, his go-to guy for anything and everything. If Cronus needs something done, Mortis will do it efficiently and discretely. In his spare time, he likes to see how long he can hold a lighter to his hand before he flinches. There's something fucking wrong with him. He also likes to bake.

Vanitas' mom is named Maya. She's a stay-at-home mom. She and Mortis have a complicated relationship. They drive each other nuts in all the good and bad ways. They've been separated, they've gotten back together, they just don't seem to work together or apart. They're probably better off together so nobody else has to deal with either of them. Maya likes shopping and going to the firing range.

Orion's dad is named Imhotep. That may or may not be his birth name, he's cagey about it. He got an OEL manga deal with Tokyopop a long time ago and was one of the few to make it work. He's been updating it since then. It's a battle manga about the egyptian gods being real and giving people super powers in the sands of Neo-Cairo. He is why Orion is the way he is.

Orion's mom is named Jamila, and she's an OBGYN. She loves her husband and son very much, but wishes they were like, 5% quieter. She likes going running and playing tennis.

Brittany's dad is named Bernard, and he's a senior software engineer. Not even on anything exciting like a video game, he works on something that tracks the regional stability of milk distribution. He has a workshop in a shed in the back yard where he toddles about doing workworking projects and home improvements.

Brittany's mom is named Joyce, and she's a real estate agent. Straight-up, NGL, she's into bimbofication. Her husband isn't even particularly into that, she's doing it to herself for herself. Like, not to kinkshame or anything but geeze. She also really likes the beach and swimming, so when Key Manati first opened itself to immigration she was the one who led the charge for the family moving there.

Kavya's dad is named Viraj, and he's an ecologist. He's studying the impact that Queen Izzy's introduction of hyenas into Key Manati has had on the local fauna. So far it seems to be a positive, as they've culled the invasive deer population down to a manageable amount. He'd love to be able to study the fish-girls, but that's sketchy political territory, so the Key Manati government is treading lightly. He's got a whole room in the house dedicated to his model trains.

Kavya's mom is named Nisha, and is an astronomer at the Key Manati Aeronotical Society for Space EXploration. (do not abbreviate it) Specifically, she monitors radio signals and background radiation from deep space for anomalies, so she works in a totally different department from Noah. She likes the job quite a lot because she's a very quiet, introverted person, who doesn't like most people, and it allows her to be alone and quiet for long stretches of time. In her free time, she enjoys reading gothic horror and indie analog horror stations.

That was a big one! Hope I didn't talk your ear off!

[mndvx]

Sorry if you’ve answered this question before, but how do you make your gifs?

With an outdated version of photoshop and a lot of patience 😤 my messy process under the cut

let's say i have this movie downloaded in .mp4 i open it in windows movie maker - or any other software that lets you do quick and easy edits and whatnot but me i use wmm even tho it's obsolete i knoooow leave me alone - cut the scene i want to gif out and save it into this tiny little file

then i open photoshop and go into import > video frames into layers (i may be a little bit off in how things are called on PS in english, but they should be in the same places anyway)

this little popup will open

since my file is exclusively the thing i want to gif i don't need to bother with the little arrow-ish things underneath the video player, they're there if you need to shorten your thing or like cut into it.

this bit here needs to be checked like this, it'll set up the gif animation or whatever. so yeah then click Ok

bim bam boom photoshop will open like this

big scary image with many tiny scary images, so first of all what i do is get on the cropping tool

this will show up in the toolbar up top

and in there you set the dimensions of the gif, 1 gif in a gifset that takes up the whole post has to be 540px wide for 2 gif next to each other it's 268px wide and i can't remember 3 by 3 but i never do that so whatever who cares.

once you've set up the dimensions you want, you got this grid thing to move around and set however you want it to be

and then you wait as it painstakingly takes its time to do it

boom! it's done!

so that's your gif raw and unprepared without any filters or whatever, no length, no speed, nothing!

down there you've got the frames of the gif, depending how long is it'll be either a lot or very very short, in this case it's 277 frames, so already you know it's not gonna be just one gif but probably two or three - which i knew btw that's on purpose!!

first thing i do when all the cropping and setting up is done is scroll all the way through the frames to see if there's a bit that won't make it into the gif, and here, there is

these last four frames show a different bit of the scene because i cut shit very messily and don't check before opening photoshop but you know! trust the process! so make sure to select the unwanted bunch and delete them

so now hurray the gif is 273 frames and it's only the one scene i want

and now the fun not fun starts!

to the right you got these, the layers

so you gotta scroll all the way up and NOT forget to click on the very last layer before you start playing around with filters and all that

this little guy right here is my bestien he's the only one i use when editing gifs, fuck everybody else on that row. when making gifs i mostly just use a combination of those three things, brightness/contrast, vibrancy and photo filters

so anyway, let's fool around with those little things and make a gif (i realize now the scene is very dark and it will look very ugly but never mind! we carry on) so there a bunch of random settings added - you gotta make sure they are all the way on top of everything or else they just won't appear on every single frame

what i do then is probably very stupid and there's probably a better way to do it, but MY PROCESS, so i divide the amount of frames i've got by the number of gifs i want to make in a set, so 273/3 that's 91 (thank you google), so we look back down at the frames

and then scroll aaaaaalllll the way back to frame 91 (if you hold shift and use the wheel it'll be much faster) and while still holding shift pressed down click on frame 92

that will select every frame from the last to that and we delete that shit

so now we only have 91 frames and that's one gif. so let's save it! but wait, no you forgot to do something! see the 0.03s? that's the gif speed or whatever, idk how it works but 0.03s is too fast, me i usually use 0.05s so what you do next is select every one of those frames you've got left and click the little pointing down arrow, that'll open that

click Other... and then set it as the speed you want

ok so your gif is at the correct speed NOW you can save it so it's file > export > save for web

this new popup will appear

currently as of 2024 gifs can't be bigger than 10Mb/Mo, this one is 4mo

so we're good we're fine. so then you just click save, name the file whatever you want and VOILAAAA, a djeef!

(and then undo the delete and repeat everything for the other two gifs you'd want to make in that set)

[flooferland]

I feel this creepypasta so much, because it's actually happening now in the real world.

There is so much AI-generated garbage, and things are becoming more and more AI-generated as time goes on. Facebook announced they are going to be adding fake AI accounts to FB and Instagram that are going to talk and blend in with ordinary humans like its a positive thing. I don't use those platforms but, jesus..

Human art on DeviantArt has already been replaced by AI, literally just open up the website and look at it. There are some incredibly detailed artworks on there on the front page, and they're confirmed by DeviantArt to have been fully generated by AI. Worst of all, people are becoming used to it, and give it a couple of years people won't be like "Ewww this is AI generated, you're using stolen art", because the newer generations will be used to it.

YouTube actively fights AI content, and even then I sometimes get fully AI generated videos on my home feed, and most of them get more views than my fully human-made content, even when I know the inner-workings of the YouTube algorithm more than the average creator.

A few months ago, I watched an informational video about cats that had an AI voice, an obviously AI-generated script, and AI artwork. And I watched the full 10 minutes of it and enjoyed it. I did not know any of it was AI generated besides the voice until someone else mentioned demonic-looking cat faces in the background of the artwork. I went as far as leaving constructive criticism to the creator about the video in the comments, without knowing it was AI. The script was AI generated, the artwork was AI generated. All of it was. And I had a fucking existential crisis after realizing it, analysing the entire video, and to my shock, EVEN THE SCRIPT WAS OBVIOUSLY AI.

I've literally worked and trained my own LLMs (Language Learning Model; what ChatGPT basically is) before, and at a first watch I couldn't even tell it was AI

I started using ChatGPT to save on time from googling things for about 1-2 years now, and I've actually become significantly dumber as a result. I don't know how to google things efficiently anymore, and I've been angrier in general as well because ChatGPT has a high chance of giving you false or severely outdated information and talking you down like you're an infant who just learnt how to use a computer keyboard. Any problem I encounter, my first thought is to just ask ChatGPT now instead of solving it myself. Some people take it even further and straight up generate code for their games and software using AI and write half of their code using AI.

The dead internet theory is true, and with AI-generated videos getting better, short-term content being popular, and AI image generators now being able to properly generate text and hands. We are literally at the mercy of tech giants choosing to ban AI content on their platforms or not. And that isn't in our favour seeing how many corporations love AI.

I'm confident Tumblr is safe though, seeing they're the platform that fills part of your screen with a creepy guy with Pikachu makeup as an ad instead of putting an actual real ad there and they just do this because its funny LMAO. Elon could never

[songs-about-girls-like-me]

chapter 1: my friends

Olivia hadn’t always been there, but it felt like that. We were friends before we were people, like matty healy would say, and so together we learnt to multiply, make enemies, separate words into syllables, talk on the phone, steal bubblegum, use google, open an email account and eventually: how to make other friends. Ella felt foreign and unknown when i met her but also like a part of yourself that was always there too. I didn’t like-like her at the beginning but for some reason i stuck to her almost as if we were paired together, like i didn’t have an option, as if our future selves had told us to wait and see. The way my mind and self unraveled to these two people is honestly unhinged thinking back. They probably know too much without knowing. We all became friends when we were changing from one brain to another, in the middle of playing like kids, and playing like pre-teens and so i had no filter. They saw me kissing the wall and the back of my hand, and sending letters to imaginary boyfriends. Together one day we made up a character, Mr. Bontrap, who had very creepy sex offender energy. He was our boss in our superhero agency and his emails were always weird. That memory sometimes haunts me and makes me laugh but also, i just wonder what was going on in our troubled heads. We shared the transition between a kid software to a teenager software and it truly feels like they know all the mush in my brain, for better AND for worse.

Ella liked hot guys since the beginning of Times. Pretty boys, with long eyelashes and colored eyes. Sometimes even blonds. Guys in good shape, not skinny guys, but a little muscly (as muscly as a primary school boy can be). She wasn’t afraid to like “the hot guy”, the one all the girls liked. Outgoing, sporty or cool, with lots of friends or at least recognized publicly for being cool. Charismatic. Even if he never crossed many words with her. Even when they could be rude or cocky. I think she always shoot for the stars in some way

Olivia always liked the funny ones. Charming, upbeat and with a terribly good comedic timing. The type of guy who would constantly make you giggle and who wouldn’t shy away from a heart-to-heart if needed. Guys who would say hi to you in the hallways and who appeared sweeter and harmless, even if that wasn’t always the case. But she was almost careless in the way she chose her crushes, and never put too much of her heart on them, not even when she liked cartoon characters when we were 6.

They both were there when I developed the most hardcore crush of my life yet, and  when I screamed so much about my favorite love song that I hit my head on a bed frame, and they even read some heavy sexy scenes written by me once. (Terrible.) The blue print for sleepovers in my brain, are the sleepovers I had with them from 2010-2013 and the first Time I played “never have I ever” was during one of those, in Elizabeth’s kitchen. Olivia knows most of my untold secrets and habits, Ella knows most of my worded-out secrets and habits. Olivia knows my depression, Ella knows my love life.

My first very vivid memory of us three being very happy giggly friends is spring 2010, when my school decided to move our classroom to the new building they had been working on for ages. We three carried our schoolbags and a lot of books to a new classroom with very big windows and nice light, and then decided to create a choreography to the jinggle of an antibacterial soap. Most of it was claps and jumps and twirls. We were ten and we were kids with kids brains, even if that year I studied national history of the 20th century harder than I’ve ever done in my entire life.

Then summer holidays came and went, without us really seeing each other’s faces, maybe cause we weren’t the type of cool kids to hang out, maybe cause we were too young, or maybe even cause we weren’t that close yet. But when the new school year started... like? I don’t know if my friends felt it too, but my brain was about to be electrocuted into a pre-adolescent state during the first month of 5th grade.

[trekwiz]

@boog-shitposting-edition that's giving me some very unpleasant flashbacks to "I don't drive, why should I be expected to look at street signs to make sure I'm in the right place?"

Document everything. But you need to document effectively. Issue; date; time. If the exchange happens by email or instant message, that's even better.

You also need to make sure your documentation isn't petty. If there's a basic personality difference causing a specific conflict, then it's not a legitimate issue to document. It needs to be things he's doing that actively disrupt the work.

Here's an example: "04/26/24, 1:30 PM. Guy complained that project wasn't worth doing. He didn't do x, y, and z, which caused the project to fail in [this way]. Employee 2 and I fixed it by doing a, b, c. We attempted to show Guy how to perform the task, but he said, 'I did it right already. I don't know why it didn't work. Just leave me alone.'"

It's important that your coworkers who are equally affected perform the same documentation when it happens to them. Why? If your manager is any good, they will assume one person complaining is having a personality conflict, and may try to get the team to bond more.

That's because it looks like an isolated issue and can be explained by your approach: maybe you speak in a way that he's misinterpreting, and if you get to know each other better, your communication will improve.

It also demonstrates that he's making the same mistakes even after being informed. It's mostly fine if someone is learning from their mistakes and making new ones to learn from; but if he's making the same mistake after correction multiple times, that's a problem.

In our case, it was the 4 people most closely working with the individual who were complaining. Ultimately, the behavior was not isolated, and the individual learned that attempting to yell at their manager in front of the next level manager and the client, while throwing a tantrum about not accepting responsibility, and pretending they've never been corrected on a documented issue, is an easy way to get fired.

After that point, a dozen other people said they had bets on when this person would be fired, because all of the overlapping work was done incorrectly, and with a nasty attitude towards those affected who asked for fixes.

None of them had documented the issues or raised complaints because they assumed the problems were so obvious that everyone would see them. Our management did not see these issues happening because they all occurred in private.

Also. If your concern is that they'll keep him because he has specialized knowledge of software. Learn the software. Take any chances you have to perform the tasks he does in that program. Watch YouTube videos about it to widen your knowledge.

If he's going to create a hostile workplace and keep everyone miserable for an extended time because his knowledge of that software makes him too valuable to fire, then do what you can to take that value away. Honestly, spite it's a great motivator when it comes to learning new skills.

Once you have a handful of situations documented, have a conversation with your manager about it. "I'm struggling to complete my work on time because Guy is continuously making it more difficult. His part of our projects are consistently done incorrectly, and I have to spend more time fixing his mistakes than doing my work. Here are some examples of when that happened, and how significantly it impacted my workload, but it's been ongoing for longer. I've attempted to provide context about how these errors affect my work, but he's not open to correction. How should I proceed?"

You may be asked directly about what you want your manager to do. Don't say "fire him." Show that you're reasonable and suggest specific areas of training. Such as, "I think he would benefit from learning a,b, c process more formally. It would also help if he understood how his work affects us down the line, and should accept correction that's meant to prevent this impact on our productivity."

That not only shows that you're reasonable, it provides tangible explanation of what would fix the conflict. It gives your manager the opportunity to fix the problem without taking drastic action--something you would want if you were unintentionally in Guy's place.

Tough it out while he gets that training, but continue documenting issues. When training doesn't improve the behavior, your manager will probably put him on a performance improvement plan.

That gives him a set amount of time to correct specific problem behaviors--this would be explained to him, along with the specific metrics he must hit. He would also be told that, basically, if he improves to the minimum expected level he'll keep his job, if he doesn't, he'll be fired.

Once it reaches that point, though, it's unlikely that he'll improve after turning down every other chance to do so. It essentially becomes 14 - 30 days notice of termination.

Huh. So it's staying on my mind and I figured I'd ask the overbrain. Have y'all ever had to deal with a total asshole at work that hated your guts?

We got this dude at work, Kevin, that throws little tantrums whenever he's asked to do anything. We mostly keep him quarantined in the upstairs workshop but he'll huff and puff and whine when anything comes in, finishes maybe 3 projects a day, and fucks up 2 of them in the process. Any attempt at telling him he's making more work for others or getting him to correct his process nets you a tantrum and a sulk. He's now decided I'm his personal enemy because I leave at 5 and sometimes use the same equipment he does. The dude actively resists anything I'm supposed to bring him, ignores my questions when we have to coordinate, and throws blatant fucking insults at me whenever we're in the same room.

I aint really had to deal with someone this unprofessional in any workplace before, and I don't know if he's going anywhere because for now he's the only one who knows a program the boss wants us to use. Has anyone dealt with a guy like this before? What's yer advice? My own stance has always been that no matter how shit a job is you don't take it out on the guy standing next to you, that just makes everything worse, I honestly don't know how to process someone who gets handed an assignment and responds to the messenger by snapping "I'm already doing MY work!"

[whatanoof]

Battling Death Itself

Anon I am so sorry that this took so long. Stuff happens, but it's still frustrating to not know if someone is ignoring your ask, if tumblr ate it, or if(like in this case) requests are just taking abnormally long. But here we go, hope you're ready for the angsty angst:(

gif credit to @badbatch

Rating: Teen

Pairing: Cal Kestis x Reader

Word Count: ~3.5k

Warnings: angst, injury, blood, swearing, death omen-like stuff, creepy dream, fluff

Summary: As a medic, you’re used to battling bleeds, cuts, burns, etc. You’re used to patients who are willing to heal, not one reckless Jedi Padawan who is ready to throw everything away to accomplish his mission.

A/N: A huge thank you to my friend @marvelassassin221b for the help with this prompt when I got stuck. You da best, and never forget it

One cannot go through a war and come out unchanged. You can pretend that the terror, violence, anger, anxiety, and selfish instinct didn’t affect you. You can gaslight and fool yourself until the bantha come home, but no one, not even the smallest civilian child, walks away without it burning into their minds like a brand of survival that will cost some of your humanity.

When you dream, you dream of a pile of lightsabers. There must be hundreds, maybe thousands, piled high enough that you cannot make out the ground from your position at the peak of the mountain. They clink and jangle under your feet, like a death rattle that refuses to leave you alone.

You want to leave. You have to leave, you can feel the spirits of the fallen Jedi Order hovering over your head, gazing down at you in disapproval everytime you disrespect their revered weapons. You take a step off of the peak.

A rending screech echoes into the death filled air, and the metal handles collapse under your feet, sliding down the side of the mountain like an avalanche and taking you with it. The sabers pile over your head, blocking out the already dim light.

Have to leave. Have to fight. So you thrash furiously, clawing at the tomb encapsulating your living body among the dead. Somehow, you find the surface. You break through the pile with a gasp, inhaling air into your starved lungs, hands pawing at the moving surface to keep you afloat in the raw desperation of survival instinct.

A weathered lightsaber is clenched in your hand, double bladed and beaten up. With a shaking hand, you press the button to activate the blade. The blue blade slices through the air with a throaty thrum and through the reality of your dream, dropping you into the darkness. You hit the ground with a grunt, somehow not impaling yourself on the lightsaber even as you stare in awestruck horror. Because you recognize the blade and handle.

A heavy hand lands on your shoulder, and you whirl with a gasp. A tall figure stands behind you, a Lasat male with kind eyes and clad in robes belonging to a Jedi. He holds a hand out to you, “That doesn’t belong to the living world.”

---

The crackle of the comm yanks you out of your fitful doze, but as you strain to listen from your position in the sitting area, no words come through the white noise. You sit up and look into the cockpit. Cere is typing furiously with eyes glued to frequency readings in front of her.

Seconds later the array in front of Greez begins to beep and the Latero leans forward to study the sensor map display. A tiny ship lit in red dances through the grid. Greez grabs the holo and enlarges it, examining the lines of the ship carefully.

“Cere--”

“Greez--”

The two stop and look at each other before Cere takes precedence, “I’ve only seen these kinds of frequencies from one kind of occupation.”

Greez nods, “I recognize the ship. It’s Haxion Brood.”

You stand and approach his chair, “Axiom what?”

Greez replies, arms darting across the controls with ease as he manipulates the energy to further analyze the readings from the environment. “The Haxion Brood, kid. Biggest smuggling and gambling ring in the Outer Rim.” He turns his head to address Cere. “I can decode their transmissions. Transfer the readings to my screen.”

Cere hits a few buttons and Greez pulls a headset over his ears. The air in the room is so thick that you could cut it with a vibroblade, until Greez speaks, “We have to go. Cere, set a course for these star coordinates.” Cere takes a single look at the symbols and nods before heading to the navigation map.

Your brow scrunches, “How do you understand their code?”

Greez waves your question off, “Not important. Point is, I can, and I know where we have to go.”

Everything is moving far too fast for you to understand. “And where is that?”

Greez barks out a sharp laugh, “Officially? Nowhere.” One arm distracts itself from the preflight check to dissolve the coordinates from the holo projector. “Unofficially? Ordo Eris.”

The Mantis lurches as it takes off and you stumble, “Wait, we have to wait for Cal to get back!”

Cere speaks from her position at the map, “He’s not coming back. We’re going to get him.”

‘Why would you need to go to Ord--’ You feel the blood drain from your face with the realization. What did the dream mean? A grim understanding filters into the processed air so that no words are needed.

“Get your kit ready. We’re going to need it.”

---

“Strap in, kid!”

Even with all of your preparation for the moment of contact, you’re still not ready for the awful screeching and rending of metal that echoes through the hull as it contacts the floor of the arena. Above the chaos and noise, you hear Greez curse. The harness digs painfully into your skin, but it keeps you in your seat long enough for the Mantis to jolt to a stop. The door opens, and Cal stumbles on board, lightsaber glowing in his hand while the other clutches his side. BD-1 clings to his shirt, beeping and chirping as it hangs on for dear life.

“Go go go!” Cal collapses against the wall, gasping for air. BD screeches and jumps onto the floor, gazing up at Cal and blipping while glancing at you periodically. You can’t tear your eyes away from the lightsaber, which has slipped to the ground in the frenzy. That doesn’t belong in the living world.

Greez hasn’t stopped swearing colorfully in at least five different languages excluding Basic, but it all fades to the background as you fumble to release your harness. “Cal!”

It’s not releasing, why isn’t it releasin--

The mechanism clicks and you’re out of your seat before the Mantis is fully off the ground. You reach Cal right as he begins to slip, “Whoa, careful there.”

Damn he’s heavy. You lower him to the ground, supporting his head on your lap. He chuckles breathlessly with eyes half-closed, “Why should I try to be careful when I have you?”

You laugh shakily, “I can’t be with you all of the time.” BD-1 bobs its head in agreement, dragging your med bag within reach with one foot.

Greez calls back, “Hang on, making the jump now!”

You grab a support bar and hunch over Cal. BD hops into your lap, and you wrap your other arm around the little droid to help hold it steady against you until the ship stops shaking around you and the peaceful quiet of hyperspace fills the hull. You allow yourself to breathe as the asteroid fades into the distance out the viewport. For now, the world will hold together.

---

By the time Cere comes back to check on you, you’ve maneuvered Cal into an upright position propped against the wall.

“Hey.” She sounds tired, stressed, strung tight like a bow string that’s about to snap. “Greez set course for Kashyyyk. We can lay low there, the Rebels have all but driven out the rest of the Imperials.”

You nod in acknowledgement. Cal is silent beside you. BD-1 boops its agreement.

She continues, “That rescue tore up the Mantis a bit. Overworked the thrusters and damaged internal regulating software, so Greez and I are going down to run diagnostics and see what we can repair en route. BD.” The little droid chirps. “Gonna need your help with the electrical portion.” BD-1 bobs its head and scampers over to her, and Cere puts a hand on the floor so that the droid can climb her shirt to her shoulder. She straightens, and regards the two of you, “All good here?”

You nod. “This guy needs a little patching up too.”

Cal gives a halfhearted wave and grin from his position on the floor, “Can confirm.”

Cere chuckles, “Alright then. Comm if you need anything. And be responsible.”

“I’m always responsible.” Cal protests. Cere doesn’t respond to him, opting instead to glance at you with an amused resignation in her eyes. She turns and leaves with BD, who chirps a goodbye as they vanish through the trapdoor that leads to the engine room.

You sigh and turn back to Cal, “I don’t even know where to start. Here.” You tug his poncho to get him to sit up.

“Careful. There’s acid.”

You yank your hand back with a hiss, shaking it off as you study the cloth. He’s right, there’s discoloration around his abdomen and the poncho is smoking, something that you missed in the chaos of landing and taking off from Ordo Eris. Upon closer examination, the acid had eaten through the poncho and soaked into the shirt below. Luckily, none touched your skin, but more unluckily, Cal has been wearing his shirt for far too long to be healthy.

“Take it off.” You lift the edge of his shirt to help him pull it over his head.

He grunts as the fabric lifts, revealing reddened and irritated skin that you begin to put healing balm on, “If you wanted me shirtless, all you had to do was ask.”

Blood rushes to your face even as you send an unimpressed look his way. He’s grinning, a smug and infuriating grin that lets you know that he knows that he got to you. You spread more of the medicine onto his skin, “You’re surprisingly chatty for someone who almost died.”

He stretches his arms, painfully attractive with how his chest and arms flex and his face scrunches and his hair--

You blink, abandoning the train of thought and finishing your work. You cap the medicine and return it to your bag. “Let me check your leg.” He sends you a look, a frustrated look that is so unique to Cal that it makes you chuckle. “I saw you limp in here, don’t give me that face.”

He groans, “I’m fine. It got me in the door, didn’t it?”

You roll your eyes. Typical. “Take them off.”

“Is this a strip game or something?” He’s… flirting with you?

“Do it.”

You did not think that this is how you would be getting Cal Kestis pantless in front of you for the first time. You’d imagined that you would be more excited with every inch of skin exposed, that your heart would race and the blood would rush to your face and your… yeah.

But instead, your stomach drops with every bruise that is revealed, the lump in your throat grows when you hear him suck a breath through gritted teeth when the cloth rubs over sensitive skin. By the time he’s pulled the pants around his ankles, your jaw is clenched hard enough to hurt. There’s a gash the length of your hand slicing across his skin. Although it’s gratefully shallow and mostly clotted, it's ugly enough to garner a double take and a long stare as you consider your options. When you speak, it’s a barely breathed whisper.

“Damn it Cal.”

He laughs, but you can hear the pained grunt that he tries to hide when he shifts, “I didn’t think it was that bad.”

“When did you do this to your leg?” You yank a bacta bag out.

He hisses as you disinfect the area, “Uh, a little after I found BD. Right before I went into the arena.”

You stop cold and stare at him, “You fought on this?”

“Well what else was I supposed to do? Roll over and die?”

You sputter, “No, but I-- no.”

He raises an eyebrow at you, a single, infuriatingly sassy, red eyebrow and lays back to allow you to apply the bacta infusion.

“How’s it going in here?” Cere chooses that exact moment to walk in, and you suppose you should be grateful that she didn’t witness the petty argument.

You shoot a look at Cal, but he’s refusing to meet your eyes. So kriffing immature. You respond to Cere, “Good. Could be better.”

She nods once, “We received a transmission from the rebel. Tarfull is willing to meet you, Cal. There are contacts on Kashyyyk that will direct you to him.”

Cal’s face is drawn and serious, aging him ten years as he considers her words. “Tell them I’ll be there. How long until we reach Kashyyyk?”

“An hour. Enough time to finish the inflight electrical repairs, so BD will be available to go with you.”

“I’ll be ready.” What? Did you just hear him correctly?

You wait until Cere leaves the room before you whirl on Cal, “Are you crazy?”

“What?”

But you’re not listening anymore, “No, you’re definitely crazy, or I’m going crazy, because I just heard you tell Cere that you would be ready to plunge into the wilderness while you’re half dead.” A pile of lightsabers.

“It’s a cut, I’m hardly half de--”

“Okay, a cut. A cut that could get infected, or could start bleeding again, or could slow you down. It won’t be such an easy fix next time if you go out like this.”

He says your name sharply, “It’s my job to go and get that holocron.”

You cross your arms over your chest tightly, hugging close enough in hopes that you can calm your pounding heart, “And it’s my job to keep you alive.”

“The longer we wait, the more danger Tarfull is in. The Rebels can’t stay in one place forever.” He pushes off of the wall, aiming to propel himself off of the ground and stand, but you catch him with a firm hand in the center of his chest.

“You need rest. Bacta might be a miracle of modern medicine, but it can’t work in an hour.” A death rattle that refuses to leave you alone.

He says your name, so seriously and rigidly that you stop and look at him, “Let me get up. I need to go.”

“No!” Your fingers twitch over the needle. “Cal Kestis. You stay right there, or I swear to the Maker I will sedate you!” Fallen Jedi hovering over you.

“This isn’t a matter of my own well being anymore, our mission is on the line!” He pushes your hand away and sits up. “This is for those children out there, so that the Sisters don’t get to them, so that they can have normal lives.”

“Don’t you fucking put that on me Cal, I know what is at risk. I know that you are the only stars forsaken Jedi in this Maker damned galaxy who can help those children, but what use are you to them if you’re dead?!” Lightsabers rattling over your head, trapping the living amongst the dea--

“It doesn’t matt--”

“Would you just shut up and listen to me for two goddamn seconds?!” You’re screaming, you know that you shouldn’t be screaming when he’s lying there injured and possibly dying, when you know that his heart is pure in intention, but why can’t he see how much you need him to be okay. Your fists are clenched, waving in the air above him and its only when his eyes widen and he puts his hands up defensively that you realize you had picked up the hypodermic needle.

Your eyes meet his and your body trembles, whether from rage or fear you can’t tell. Carefully, moving millimeter by millimeter, you lower your hand and drop the needle. It makes no sound as it hits the ground, which is remarkable considering how effectively it had silenced the situation.

“I--” Your voice cracks and in any other situation you would be embarrassed. But you clear your throat roughly, “I can’t lose you. I won’t let you go off and get yourself killed. You need to let your body heal, because you can keep going, keep pushing yourself to the limit and I have no doubt that you are strong enough to, but your body is going to fail you one day, and it’s my job to make sure it doesn’t just yet so please listen to me, I’ve never asked for you to stay before.” You’re rambling, you’re talking too much because you scraped just a little too close to the surface with that first sentence. “Please Cal, I couldn’t live with myself if I let you go out there like this and yo--”

You’re cut off by Cal’s body contacting your firmly, arms curling around your body as he hugs you tight to his chest. And all of your worries and problems that you were ranting about seconds earlier fade away because his bare chest is right against the skin of your cheek and he’s so warm and smells so good and you’ve forgotten why you were--

“Breath. It’s okay.” He demonstrates with several deep breaths, chest rising and falling against your cheek. You hear the whoosh of air in his lungs, and you shakily try to imitate. You fail the first two times, your pounding heart and surging adrenaline forcing your breaths to come shallow and fast. But he stays close to you, radiating comfort and calm that soaks into you and gradually slows you down.

“You’re still not going out there on that leg.”

Cal shushes you, “I know. I need you to calm down before we get to Kashyyyk. I’m not going to leave until I know you’re okay, and those children still need saving.”

Annoyance sparks through you, “I told you not to put that on me.”

“Yeah, yeah I know. That was a cheap shot.” You wriggle to try and get out of his grip, but he only tightens his arms around you. “Stop fighting me.”

“Only if you stop fighting me.” Still, he’s too strong and you can’t deny that you’re exactly where you want to be.

“Oh I intend to. But I can’t stay forever. How long do you need me to rest?” His chin rests on the top of your head.

You hum thoughtfully, snuggling closer with your fingers drumming gently on his skin, “Bacta treatments optimize after five hours of immersion in the tissue.”

“I’ll give you two hours.”

“Three.” You counter. “I can accelerate the healing if you give me three hours.”

He hums deep in his chest, vibrating against your skin, “Deal.”

You stay like that for a few more minutes, peacefully breathing the filtered Mantis air that smells like antibiotic burn cream and metal. When you open your eyes, your gaze lands on the lightsaber, which has rolled into a corner since the hit and run on Ordo Eris.

“Cal.” Your voice is raspy from the lump in your throat. “The lightsaber.”

He hums, calling the handle to his hand with the Force, “Yeah. Should keep it safe.” He clips it to his belt with one hand, the other still crooked firmly to cradle you.

“Where did you get it?”

He pauses for a fraction of a second, then his arm returns to stroke the back of your head, “It was Master Tapal’s. The Purge. It’s all that I have left from before.”

“Your Master. Was he a Lasat?”

Cal chuckles, “Most intimidating one that I’ve ever met. Wisest one too, but he had a leg up on the competition, being a Jedi Master.” He pulls away slightly to catch your gaze. “How did you know that he was a Lasat?”

You hum, burrowing back into his chest, “I’ll explain later.” For now, the world would hold together.

Cal Taglist: @marvelassassin221b, @my-awakened-ghost

[musings-from-mars]

@nuts-and-dolts-week - Day 1 : Childhood Friends (or, acquaintances?)

((EDIT: I reblogged this with an AO3 link if you want to leave a comment!))

Ruby hadn’t really understood why her dad had been so nervous about this big trip to Atlas. A whole week in the most technologically advanced place in Remnant? How could this not be the coolest thing ever? Almost all of her Signal classmates were going on the week-long trip, too. Despite her dad’s “I don’t knows” and “maybes,” Ruby had managed to get him to sign the permission slip and pay the dues for her to go. Of course, his condition that he chaperone was annoying, but at least it was happening! Ruby couldn’t wait to see the cool tech and weapons at Atlas Academy.

Much to her dismay, however, Ruby realized this school trip was ending up being way more boring than she expected. As her dad had put it, this really was shaping up to be “an elaborate recruitment event dressed up like an educational trip.” High-ranking military types and grizzled old academy professors gave tour after lecture after presentation, but to Ruby, it all blurred together. Who cared about graduation rates, or quality of education? Ruby wanted to see the cool stuff!

Which is why, despite knowing it would probably get her in trouble, she sneaked away during a lecture on the history of the kingdom to try to look around for something more interesting. Her class had spent the whole day at this academy, so Ruby knew well enough that this place was huge. But she hoped what little she’d manage to see would feature something cool. Maybe a weapons workshop, or a tech lab of some sort. There had to be something around in these huge echo-y halls.

Just when she was about to give up her search and sneak back into the lecture hall, she heard something from a nearby room. She shuffled closer and listened, noticing the placard by the door, Project Workshop #307.

“Her software is coming along even better than planned,” a man’s voice from within spoke. “The specifics of her hardware is the more troublesome aspect. But as an individual, she is displaying a tremendous level of self-awareness and agency. Not to mention she is quite personable and friendly, if not a tad bit literal. I’m still working on her ability to detect hyperbole.”

“It’s very impressive,” another man spoke. He sounded familiar. “But I am certain you know that the hardware is the top priority at this time. I find you focus too much on this project’s more...sentimental aspects.”

“Yes, well, you did ask for her to be as believable as possible. And I feel she is well on the way to achieving that goal!”

“Indeed. But you do understand what I am telling you, correct?”

“Yes, general. Understood.”

General? General Ironwood, that guy who gave the big welcome speech that morning?

“Good. I am very satisfied with the progress you’ve made on this project. Keep up the good work.”

“Thank you, sir. Good day!”

Ruby heard the sturdy thumping of boots on the floor, and she panicked and petal burst away to hide under a nearby bench. She held her breath and watched as who must have been the general walk past, none the wiser. She sighed in relief, then began to crawl out from under the bench only to see someone else leaving the same room, and she yelped and hid once more.

The person walked by her hiding spot, or...a robot? Four robotic legs ambled down the hall, and Ruby thought for a second that a big mech had been released inside the school. She poked her head out to look, but instead saw a man in a chair. It was like a wheelchair, but...with legs. Still cool, but not a mech.

Once the man and his robo-chair had disappeared around a corner, Ruby turned her attention to the room he’d left. He’d shut the door and she feared it was locked, but was relieved when it opened when she tried the knob. She grinned and looked both ways down the hall one more time, then entered. Time to see what this project was.

The men had talked about software, and how realistic she was becoming. Was this an AI of some sorts? A completely artificial person, even? The concept blew Ruby’s mind, and she hoped that was the case. She entered the room and gently shut the door behind herself, then turned to see...a laptop. A laptop sitting on a table, surrounded by notebooks and papers. Ruby had been expecting something cooler to look at. Maybe an android, like the hardware the men had talked about. She gave the notebooks a closer look, and was at least intrigued by their content.

The P.E.N.N.Y. Project.

“Penny...” Ruby muttered in curiosity as she looked at the header of one of the notebooks.

The laptop screen turned on, a bright lime green. “Salutations!”

“Wah-!” Ruby yelped and almost fell over, instead managing to land her butt in a nearby desk chair. She looked at the laptop with wide eyes. The screen was completely lime green, save for a small power on/power off icon in the bottom right.

“‘Wah’?” The feminine voice asked. “What does that mean?”

Ruby held her breath as she slowly adjusted herself in her seat, then used her legs to roll her way closer to the monitor. “Hello?”

“Hello!” The voice answered with delight.

“Who are you?” Ruby asked.

“I am Project P.E.N.N.Y., but you may just call me Penny.”

Ruby’s jaw fell open, and she glanced at the notebook again. “You...you’re an artificial intelligence.”

The voice seemed to giggle. “In a way, I am. My intelligence is man-made, but my more proper categorization is ‘Synthetic Person.’”

“Woah...” Ruby murmured, staring at the screen.

“‘Woah?’“ Penny asked. “What does that mean?”

“It...” Ruby wasn’t sure how to answer. “It’s just a thing you say when, like, you see something really cool.”

“‘Woah’ is an exclamation of wonder?”

“Yeah!” Ruby said with a laugh. “That makes more sense than what I said.”

“Thank you for teaching me!”

“Uh, sure.” Ruby was talking to a computer. Or, well, a synthetic person. This was so flipping awesome! This was exactly the kind of thing she had been hoping to find.

“Who are you?” Penny asked.

“I-I’m Ruby.”

“It is wonderful to meet you, Ruby!”

Her enthusiasm was infectious. “And it’s awesome meeting you too!”

“You are the first person besides my fathers that I have gotten to talk to so freely.”

Her fathers? “You mean the general, and that man in the...spider chair?”

“Precisely!” Penny confirmed. “Pietro Polendina is the one who is designing me, and General Ironwood is overseeing my progress.”

“That’s really cool,” Ruby said with a laugh. “When do you think you’ll be finished?”

“That is uncertain at this time. My father is currently designing a physical body for me! But the problem with that is without an Aura of my own—”

The door suddenly opened, and Ruby spun around in her chair to face whoever it was. Except she spun herself a little too hard and continued rotating, having to turn her head to face the man in the robo-chair while scrambling to stop her spinning.

“P-pardon me,” the man said, eyes wide and glasses crooked on his face as he stared at Ruby.

“Sorry!” Ruby yelped, hopping to her feet and standing upright, rubbing the back of her head. “I, uh...” She then quickly fell to the floor and mimed searching around for something. “I dropped my...lucky bottle cap.” My what...?

The man adjusted his glasses and chuckled. “Child, shouldn’t you be with your classmates?”

Ruby’s cheeks warmed. “Yeah, uhm...I got lost?”

The man Ruby deduced to be the Pietro Polendina whom Penny had mentioned shook his head fondly. “I do not blame your curiosity, young one.” He glanced at the desk. “I see you have made an acquaintance, Penny.”

“Ruby and I are acquainted?” Penny asked, sounding excited. “I have never been acquainted to someone before!”

Pietro chuckled fondly, like Ruby’s dad would anytime she’d go on a ramble about weapons or types of Grimm. “And while I am all in favor of you meeting new people in time, I’m afraid all information to do with you is proprietary at the moment. You and Ruby will have to catch up some other time.”

“I understand,” Penny said. “My conversational software is very impressionable.”

Ruby stood back to her feet as straight as she could, feeling hot under her Signal uniform. “So, uhh, I should go, huh?”

“Do not forget about your lucky bottle cap!” Penny reminded her earnestly.

“Oh, uhh...” Ruby’s face burned.

Pietro let out a hearty laugh and shuffled his robo-chair to the side. “Run along, Ruby. You are certainly missing a riveting retelling of Atlas’ military history.” Humorous sarcasm tinged his words.

Ruby nodded and awkwardly marched to the door. “Y-yes, sir,” she said, then struggled with whether she should salute or not, then compromised with a wave. “Uhm...bye, Penny.”

“Farewell! I hope to talk to you again soon, acquaintance!“

[ssparklemotion]

frerard reclist i

some favorites, no particular order, short thoughts in italics

Fog, Sheets and Thunder by theopteryx

Not as grey as it seems. A post-apocalyptic postal service AU.

Words: 5.536

Dystopia, post-apocalypse. Since the mcr fandom is so open to all kind of settings, the key to make it all so awesome and credible is the characterization. This one nails it and the world created here is also a 11/10.

Under the Hide of Me by fleurdeliser, tuesdaysgone

Prohibition in New Jersey means mob bosses and bootleggers running hooch up and down the shore and into the city. Gerard Way, his brother, and their friend Ray are running an operation for the Capo Maranzano. Rival factions are trying to take over the business, and Frank Iero, from a prominent Mob family, is sent to them as their new driver. But the Ways and Ray are hiding two secrets: their own still on a farm in the Pine Barrens, and something darker yet. They're werewolves.

Words: 18.228

Period!fic + werewolves + mafia. It’s like they ran an algorithm software to mix & create a story with the most loved tropes in the the MCR fandom. It’s also brilliant. Awesome characterization, niiiice plot, mature writing: check.

A Natural Reaction to Rough-rousing by Bexless

He made it to the bathroom and stood there leaning heavily on the sink, staring at himself in the mirror. He didn’t look like a creepy sadist. But neither did Christian Bale, and that hadn’t ended well for anybody.

Words: 27,994

Frank is always hurting Gerard. It’s no bandom if there isn’t an on tour fic. Awesome characterization!!! Great humour. Nice references. 

you weaseled your way into my heart (and ferreted out my feelings) by akamine_chan

You gotta watch out for those bands with umlauts.

Words: 5.444

It’s not a Magic AU, but there’s some magic going on somehow. Humor, on tour, animal transformation!

Envision The Magic by orphan_account

Gerard is a talented magician, responsible for much of the success of the famous Envision Destiny cruise ship. He's also one of those people. You know, one of those people who just seem to take up all the space they come across with their arrogance and confidence. You wouldn't wanna touch their personality with a 10-foot pole, but still people admire them.

That is beyond Frank. Working behind the cruise ship bars and seeing Gerard pretty much every day, he can't understand what's so great about him. Besides, everybody else doesn't have to deal with his snide remarks and rude comments. Because if there's one thing Gerard seems to love, it's the act of constantly pestering Frank.

Words: 69.420

The first frerard fic I have read. I was in my teens and I still adore it. The setting is very original. Gerard is an asshole. He sucks. I’ve had to read some asshole!frank next to avenge him.

Septicemia by orphan_account

Gerard keeps ruining things, but he never means it. Frank keeps getting hurt, but he never feels it.

Words: 44.884

Gore, super powers, kinda heavy&sad. I still read it from time to time. Mature writing, awesome setting.

Smokeless Flame of Fire by tabulaxrasa

Frank blinked. "What kind of name for a genie is Gerard?"

Words: 21.405

Yeah. Gerard is a genie. Frank is his little punk high schooler self. 

Public Enemy by tabulaxrasa

In 1932, Gerard Way has been making a name for himself robbing banks up and down New Jersey. Frank Iero, analyst for J. Edgar Hoover's Division of Investigation, is determined to catch him.

Words: 21.163

A cops and robbers au. Incredible! I remember being awed by this.

A Kiss With A Fist by iamdali

Part 1 of Boxer!Fic Words: 46;122

Frank is a boxer in a illegal gym. Gerard is a jobless and fresh out of school doctor. It’s perfect! Amazing writing, setting and characterization combo.

Buzzed by synonomy

"You should," Frank gets out between snorts, "you should cut your hair."

"What?" Gerard wheezes.

"No, it's just-- it's all stuck up." Frank shuffles forwards on his knees and then his hands are in Gerard's hair. Gerard's laughter dies down abruptly. Frank's fingers are surprisingly gentle on his scalp, ruffling it up, carding through it. "We'd probably have to wash it first, though," he says thoughtfully

Words: 6.345

And here is a pwp. Stoned guys, awesome smut.

[dingodad]

act 2 is... not fun! i can basically go down the reasons i didn’t enjoy the game without spoiling anything about the game’s actual plot.

like i’ve said already pretty much the entire charm factor of the first act is gone. act 1 laughed in the face of trial-and-error point-and-clicks that acted like you were stupid for putting the wrong two items together by giving completely unique flavour for every combination of items. even if you knew two items didn’t go together, there was incentive for you to try! act 2 has none of this. 90% of object interactions are the same almost verbatim “these items probably won’t work together” text. there’s no incentive to try out different items, which makes a majority of the game’s objectives into just “click on the one right thing and then walk to the end of the room”.

the rooms themselves are totally empty! most have between one and three interactive objects in them; any other setpieces, no matter how intriguing they might be to the player and/or the viewpoint character joey, serve no plot purpose and are therefore purely background. the few objects that can be observed have only short, dry descriptions; any object description longer than a single sentence is a RARITY. even extremely obvious and again, interesting to the player combinations yield zero returns. there’s a huge ant lusus in one scene. applying the lusus handbook to this lusus returns the message... there’s nothing in this book about giant ants.

there are entire rooms full of CHARACTERS who can’t even be OBSERVED... 4 characters in a room of maybe two dozen can be clicked on, and no real reason is given for this. i suppose the player is just expected to “recognise” who the “main characters” are because they already saw the troll call... how many years ago?

not only are the rooms empty but they are huge. they are way too large for the miniscule amount of content in them and this is ONLY compounded by the backtracking fetch quests you start being put through in the second half of the act. a character literally makes fun of you for going back and forth through the game over and over again but no remedy is provided. one of the ultimate objectives of the game involves backtracking all the way back to the START of the game... only to be told you have no reason to be there, and should walk right back to the end again.

the entire inventory system is basically a joke in this act. most of your items will not get used. when you do get a new item, you will almost invariably get rid of it again by the time you leave that same room. again, almost no item combinations result in anything funny. one of the only act 1 items that gets used in this act is - if you’ll allow me to spoil one thing - xefros’ microphone, which he gives away to another character at almost the beginning of the act. xefros’ entire "rapping about random objects” shtick from the first game is completely discarded! it literally almost feels like an excuse for the writers not to have to write any more witty flavour than they absolutely have to. joey gets a new abilitech in this act which she uses exactly once. the rest of her abilitechs are basically dead space in her inventory like everything else.

instead of the actually charming... you know... pointing and clicking aspects of the first act, the developers seem to have taken on board how popular the friendship simulators were, and tried to make act 2 a dialogue-driven character game? which would be fine if... the characters were interesting. the fact is that most of the stuff they might have wanted to explore in act 2 has ALREADY BEEN DONE, in the friendsims. let it be said that the ace attorney minigame we all knew was coming takes up about half of the game. anyone who told you hiveswap act 2 was about 8 hours of playtime obviously milked as much out of this courtroom sequence as they could, which, if you don’t care about hiveswap’s small cult cast of jadebloods and tealbloods, is very little. most of the game’s dialog was obviously written for this scene. unlike the rest of the game, almost every little combination of choices has its own unique text in this part of the game: but if you’ve never played an ace attorney game before, you will have a hard time finding any of the right or even interesting combinations. to put it bluntly, unless you were already really invested in some of the elements involved, this part of the game will be a long, boring slog.

the game isn’t even particularly funny. act 1 got laughs out of me. act 2′s jokes either fall flat or quickly beat themselves to death. the cultural references serve no purpose. ace attorney “because lawyers!” is funny as a sight gag (like terezi’s OBJECTION!s in the original homestuck) but it serves no purpose as an extended, hour-long part of gameplay. and why does an ongoing gag about KPOP of all things take up so much of this scene, in a game that’s been patting itself on the back over its appeal to 90s nostalgia? (this to me is one of the most damning examples of the what pumpkin team putting out stuff that they personally find hilarious without once stopping to wonder if it’s a product that will actually have appeal). why is the “highblood statue” used in a single scene actually an anime figurine? because anime is funny, i guess?

the game DOES look beautiful, with little exception (the game’s minimalist philosophy makes most of the rooms like pretty empty, after the immediate “wow we’re on an alien planet!” magic wears off), but i struggle to say it’s even a serviceable bit of software. the gui is practically inscrutable. every door says something different on it. “exit”? “open”? “use”? some doors just have a pair of feet hovering above them, which means “walk through door” (just like in act 1, which worked fine). except sometimes the feet just mean “walk on this floor”. it depends entirely on which room you’re standing in.

the actual gameplay is hardly any better. let’s ignore the ace attorney minigame for once. any puzzle that isn’t “bring item from character a to character b” is literally indecipherable. they’ve graciously allowed us to finally use the hint button, which is completely necessary for some of the more arcane ““puzzles”“ (which are really just more of the same trial and error click-and-clicks), but for some reason... only joey can get hints? you’re free to switch between joey and xefros at any time, but only for xefros does the button say “hints currently unavailable”. if you want hints you have to switch to joey. this has no other bearing on the gameplay.

music is fine, but not “we’ve been sitting on this soundtrack for years!” or “we got the undertale guy to compose for us!” levels of blow-your-mind incredible. it’s obvious that the soundtrack composed years ago is not reflective of a game that was clearly cobbled together within the last 15 months. did i mention that out of the 38 troll call characters who were literally advertised as “the cast of hiveswap act 2″, zebede and charun are just entirely absent without cause or explanation?

[trulymadlysydney]

1/?? hi :) me again ok this one is ESPECIALLY long but not smutty so don’t get too excited and idk where I’m going with this and it’s not as good as the others, but I just wanted to send you since I’ve got nowhere else to post lol, and if anyone wants to add more to this please do! OK ~ so what if you’re a assistant working for Harry’s team or at Columbia records or a song writer that Harry was introduced to while recording his first album during a recording/songwriting session through Jeff or someone. And you and Harry have developed to have a pretty close friendship but it’s just that, friendship. You’re not much for going out, tend to keep to yourself, stay behind the scenes (and as anonymous as you can), and you come off as really shy. Harry thought you didn’t like him at first because of how quiet you were as he and the rest of the crew chatted, but as the session went on, Harry realized you’re kind of brilliant and can be really funny. (And you won’t lie, you assumed harry to be kind of arrogant, but you realized that he’s just very passionate about what he does and when he has an idea or vision he sticks with it through fruition). And yeah, you both grow pretty close as friends, close enough that he’d call you sometimes after a party, sometimes drunkenly but most times still pretty sober asking why didn’t you show up? and if he can crash at your very modest apartment, because he got idea for a melody in the middle of the party and wants to workshop it with you. And you both end up staying up extra late, sometimes sharing a joint or sometimes you just sipping a glass of wine, and Harry calling in to order pizza from the only place open, strumming around on your guitars, playing around on your keyboard, papers covered in scratched out lyrics all about your living room. Harry will ask you to burn one of those scented candles you have because he’s been obsessed with the smell ever since the first time he came to your place (and he doesn’t know that you’ve got him one wrapped up in your closet for a Christmas gift). And sometimes there’s little arguments about what lyrics should be, or how the melody should go, but most times there’s laughs because Harry is already funny, but slightly drunk Harry is hilarious. And harry’s never heard you actually laugh out loud before, but when it’s just the two of you at your place, you’re more open and carefree. That first time he heard you actually laugh, one that comes from the belly, he noticed how much your face lit up and honestly gave him butterflies. And you’ve learned through your friendship that he’s actually a very affectionate with the people and friends he likes in private, and you’re not much on receiving praise or affection from people not even your family but when you come up with the exact guitar riff that Harry had in mind but couldn’t articulate out loud, he’s exclaiming “oh my god that’s it!!!” and grabbing the side of your face to give you the most exaggerated kiss on your cheek “you’re so talented” (it’s half teasing and half because he knows that you know that you’re good, really damn good at what you do, but he wants you to know how much he appreciate you and how much you’ve helped him improve as an artist) with a stupid grin on his face. And you’re all scrunching your face up saying “oh come on Harry!!” pretending to be annoyed wiping your cheek off all while hoping that Harry doesn’t catch your blush. Now Harry always insists on sleeping on your couch despite you saying that he should take the bed (because you know that he has appearances, shows, work outs for movie roles to do and you want him to at least have a good sleep. and sometimes he does take your bed because you’re persistent and won’t take no for an answer) 1/?

Anonymous asked:

1/2 But more often than not, you and Harry will unexpectedly fall asleep right there in the living room, your head both resting on the same tiny couch pillow that managed to end up on the floor each of you with sharing a set of AirPods listening to a song you’ve been really inspired by, or him on the couch with you on the floor your head resting near his thigh with the keyboard still resting on your lap. And idk where I’m going with this, but there’s one night where you’re sitting on your computer playing around with your software, and you’re about to jokingly comment on how quiet Harry’s been and how you’re doing all the work now, but as you glance a little behind your shoulder, you notice that Harry who had been stretched out on your sofa, had fallen asleep with his arms cross across his chest. And you’re sort of admiring his face, his cheekbones, his long eyelashes, his lips, and why is it so true that guys look so much younger when they are sleep. And maybe as you go to move some of his hair out of his face, Harry shifts and his eyes open a little and as you quickly go to pull your hand back to you before you think he can notice, Harry is reaching out to grab a hold onto your hand and kisses it as he groggily asks “what time is it?” before shutting his eyes again. You’re all in shock looking at your held hand back to his face but manages to break out of it to look back at your laptop and say “4:44” and Harry’s eye are still shut as he rotates his shoulders, getting more comfortable, squeezing your hand a little and says “hmm”. And you wait a beat and….he’s still holding your hand. There’s a beat as you nervously swallow and chew at your lip, before you start to say “are you sure you want to sleep on the couch? let me go get the bed set up for you” and Harry feels you starting to give up and before you go to fully stand, Harry is pulling you back to lay on your side, your back to his chest,on the couch. And you’re blushing, heart is beating so loud and fast that you’re sure Harry can hear it and his hand is resting now over your side near your bellybutton. And you’re quiet for a bit because this is a different type of close and…you really like it. But you’re still all in your head about this and while you’re stuck in your head, as if Harry can hear your thoughts, you feel him press a kiss to the back of your head before saying “are you comfortable?” And you start to stumble out ”no actually, not at all, just wasn’t expecting this but you know I can still go set the bed for you I know your back hurts you sometimes and I-” and you’re cut off as another kiss is pressed to the back of your head and Harry’s hand closest to your stomach squeezes it a little and whispers “Sleep. just sleep.” And you do. And you’ll figure this out tomorrow.

Andddd that’s all I got, not the best concept but I just started writing it and got too into it before realizing it wasn’t going anywhere.

-----

BESTIE OH MY GOD NO THIS IS SO SOFT?!?! PLEASE LIKE THE UNSPOKEN TENSION? YOU BOTH KNOW YOU FEEL IT AND YOU'RE BOTH GETTING BUTTERFLIES AND HE'S SOFTLY ADMIRING YOU AND YOUR LAUGH AND THE WAY YOU GET SO INTO WHAT YOU'RE DOING, AND YOU'RE DOING THE SAME THING AND OH MY GOD

[joheun-saram]

promise - 1 (knj)

Chapter 1: New Year’s Eve

masterlist | next

Summary- It’s NYE and you can’t wait to bring in 2017 surrounded by your friends, but there’s a new cute boy around. You’re intrigued but quickly find out there is it’s no good being cute when he’s literally the most infuriating person you’ve met.

word count- 3.1k

pairing- asshole!Namjoon x Reader (alternatively, edgelord!Namjoon)

rating- PG15

genre- collegeau, roommatesau, enemies2lovers, slow burn, this chapter is platonic fluff(and angst I guess), future angst, fluff and smut

warnings- alcohol consumption, marijuana consumption, Namjoon being an absolute ass, he’s against socialism for a hot second (to rile her up, our Joonie is still woke tho nw), mention of sex, Jungkook’s parents based on my actual best friend’s parents (shoutout to their amazing jello shots!)

a.n- Well, well, well... if it isn’t my simp ass writing another Namjoon series. Love that about me. Get ready for some slow burn and a lot of Namjoon just being annoying! 🥴This is a drabbleish series so most parts will be about 2-3k.

Thanks for the beautiful @ditttiii​ for beta reading and to @aroseforyoongi​ for helping me with the political argument (also for dubbing this Namjoon edgelord!joon 🤣)

As always feedback appreciated, a reblog and a like goes a far way. Send me an ask! 💌

taglist- @namyoongles​ @cheesecakes-randomshitz​ 

Send me an ask to be on the taglist!

-

You were running late. Very late.  With a sigh you watched the street pass you by in a blur, the distant roar of your bus dimmed by the rap music that blasted through your ears. You looked at the group chat to be bombarded by messages.

Jungkook: bro istg if you’re not here in the next ten minutes

Hoseok: HURRY UP! JK IS DOING SHOTS WITH HIS DAD OMFG

Jimin: OMG Y/N. WE’RE GETTING DRUNK WITHOUT YOU

Jungkook: adsdsd duddde u suk wdt syop taling foevr

Yoongi: I’m gonna drink all the whiskey I got from Korea this week if you don’t get your butt over here.

Yoongi: Jieun says hi btw!

The texts continued to devolve into nonsense as you willed the bus to move faster. You were annoyed. Jungkook had planned the new year’s party at his parent’s house, and you were beyond excited to party, having spent the entire winter break stuck at home with your parents as they argued over the smallest things. You tightened your grip around your duffle bag as the bus came to a stop. Trudging through the snow you finally reached the familiar red door of your best friend’s house.

You knocked, taking in the large three-storey suburban house as you waited to be let in, already digging through your backpack for the bottle of tequila you had brought along. If they took any more time to open the door, you were going to start drinking right there on the porch. Before you could uncap your bottle, you were greeted by Jungkook’s dad, the familiar, jolly older man moved his hair out of his eyes as he greeted you.

However, before you could finally get out of the cold, he stopped you, presenting a tray of colourful jello shots.

“Y/N! Penalty for being late. You have to take a shot!” He laughed as you sputtered, his face reddened by what you assumed was alcohol. You had known Jungkook since the two of you were freshmen in university and had routinely stayed with him and his parents during break, but you had never seen Mr. Jeon this drunk. You stood awkwardly, not knowing what to do as he insisted, your friend finally joining him and encouraging you as you tentatively took a shot.

“I changed my mind! One of every colour!” Mr Jeon exclaimed joyously as Jungkook groaned.

“Dad! It’s cold. Let her in!” He whined and thankfully, you were let in. Taking off your shoes and leaving your bag by the door, you ventured into the living room where you saw all your friends. Hoseok leaned where he sat on the couch, his face buried in his phone as he, no doubt, texted his hookup. Jimin danced next to the Christmas tree the Jeons had yet to put away with a glass of liquor as Yoongi played the piano in the corner, cuddling with his girlfriend Jieun. Bubbling warmth swelled your heart as you saw all your favourite people.

“Come on let’s get you a drink!” Jungkook put his arm around you, planting most of his weight on you due to the alcohol raging through his veins as he guided you to the kitchen through the living room. In the kitchen, you were met by the sight of his parents swaying together to Yoongi’s expert piano skills, and a man you didn’t recognize sitting at the breakfast island, talking to Jungkook’s younger sister animatedly, who seemed to be trying to leave the conversation.

Jungkook poured you a rum and coke, easy on the coke, as he made his way to the breakfast bar. You stood next to his sister, making small talk before she excused herself to go to her room. She never stuck around long during these get-togethers. 

When she left, you were left standing awkwardly next to the only stranger at this party. The first thing you noticed was that he was tall. Much taller than all your friends, his dark black hair styled away from his face, a strand falling on his forehead shaped like a comma. He was dressed much like everyone else in dark wash jeans and a navy t-shirt with white leaves outlined on the sleeves, except his jeans fit him almost too perfectly, sculpting his thick thighs. Although he seemed friendly, greeting you with a pretty dimpled smile, your sudden attraction to him made you nervous.

“Hi. I’m Namjoon,” he said, eyeing you from over his cup as he sipped whatever concoction he was drinking.

“Oh shit! I keep forgetting you guys have never met!” Jungkook slurred as he sidled up to the two of you with his stool, leaving you standing between the two sitting boys. “Namjoon and I have been friends for years. I think we probably met the same time you and I did, but I guess we never ended up meeting together?” He ended his statement as a question, and it surprised you. You thought in three years you would have met all of his friends. 

“Well, that and I took a break from school. I was doing an internship in California.” He beamed, clearly proud of his achievement. “I worked at Twitch, you know them?” He smirked, and you had to fight your urge to roll your eyes. Of course, he worked in Cali. You went to a university renowned for its engineering degree and it was the goal of every software engineering student to land an internship in California. Those lucky enough to achieve it used it as social currency and bragging rights. You despise those people. It wasn’t that you weren’t smart enough to land that opportunity, in fact, you were coming off of your internship with Facebook last term, but you always felt flaunting a job to be such an ugly trait. However, Namjoon was Jungkook’s friend and so you let it slide.

“Ah Twitch. Very cool.” you hummed as you drank.

“Yeah. What program are you in?” He asked, continuing the conversation as Jungkook disappeared to talk to his parents, trying to convince them to retire for the night since they had embarrassed him enough.

“Computer science,” you replied non-committedly, watching his face break into a wide smile.

“Oh, that’s so cool! Me too!” He replied excitedly. You had to admit, his smile was very charming and you let your guard down a little more. Maybe he just got influenced by kids in your program to brag about Cali. “I haven’t seen you in any of my classes though! Would’ve remembered you. None of the other compsci girls are this pretty.” He smirked, clearly proud of his flirtatious comment. You narrowed your eyes at him, immediately put off.

“So glad to know you deem me pretty enough to notice.” You rolled your eyes, before grabbing your bottle of tequila and a few disposable shot glasses and making your way to the living room. “Well, it was… okay to meet you. I’m gonna go do shots.”

“Wait! I’m sorry, did I offend you?” he asked, brows furrowed in confusion as he easily caught up to you, walking beside you and even sitting next to you on the floor, as you lined up the glasses to pour the drinks for everyone.

“No it’s cool, dude. We just don’t have anything in common,” you said nonchalantly as the rest of your friends crowded the table, excitedly taking a shot glass in hand as Jungkook waltzed in with a plate full of lime wedges and an intricately expensive-looking salt shaker. Namjoon didn’t say anything as everyone took their shots, but watched you throw back your drink, noticing the small smile that overtook your features as the alcohol from earlier finally started to take effect. 

After a few more shots, the party really started. Although there were only seven people, your rowdy, borderline chaotic group had you laughing. Hoseok was going on some tale about his adventures back home where he ended up at a bar with his high school friends and got the numbers of four girls by doing a disgustingly named muff-diver shot. He bragged about his game, and you burst his bubble by telling him it was really only because he was hot. Something he didn’t take much offence to as he wiggled his eyebrows at you. Namjoon, however, came to Hoseok’s defence, much to your annoyance.

“And how would you know? I doubt Hobi here has used his A+ game on you.” He raised an eyebrow in challenge, making you scoff as you rolled your eyes.

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

“Well… you guys are friends, I doubt he would try to pick you up.” He spoke with a logical tone, as he eyed you and Hoseok.

“Oh really? Okay Hobi. Since your game is so great. Let’s see it.” You turned around, staring at your friend next to you. Namjoon leaned back against his hands on the floor, watching the scene unfold with a smirk.

“Really darling? Don’t blame me when you fall for me.” Hoseok moved closer, finishing his drink as you huffed in annoyance. You were in your first stage of drunk, the stage where you got mean for no reason

“Get on with it, loser. Your face is making me drier as we speak.” You waved as Hoseok leaned in, his nose rubbing gently against your ear, his breath on your neck, making you shiver slightly.

“Hey baby, how about you let me take you downstairs and defile you on Jungkook’s Iron Man sheets.” His voice was low, almost a growl. You never thought you would hear Hoseok’s sexy pickup voice and you were sure that if you were someone who had not seen him whine and cling onto you after a few drinks, you’d be putty in his hand. Instead, you burst out laughing, doubling over with your hands on his thighs as tears of mirth filled your eyes. Not one to give up that easily, Hoseok continued.

“See. I’m a funny guy Y/N. Let me eat that pussy!” He couldn’t hold back any longer either, his voice breaking at the word pussy as he too devolved into a fit of laughter. His comment, however, broke Yoongi and Jieun out of their bubble as they looked up from their make out session, looks of horror on their faces.

“Please tell me you did not just say that Hobi!” Jieun chided, her voice shrill.

“That’s fucking disgusting.” Yoongi shivered as he drank more of his whiskey in an attempt to calm himself. Hoseok and you continued laughing at your friends’ reaction, the rest of the group joining in, except Namjoon who seemed to be watching the two of you with raised brows.

“Wait. I don’t get it. That should’ve worked.”

“Yeah dude. Y/N what the fuck? Let me eat that pussy!” Hoseok grabbed you by the shoulders, shaking you while screaming at your face, between giggles.

“Oh my god. I’m gonna get a stomach ache. Stop!” you wheezed, before turning to Namjoon. “Sorry dude. I’ve literally helped Hobi pee once. There’s no going back to sexy when you see him whine about forgetting how urinating works.”

“Yeah and no offence babe, but you literally had your hands on my dick and it was flaccid as hell.”

“You guys are weirdly close,” Namjoon commented, his face scrunched as he assessed you and Hoseok.

“You think they’re close, you should see her and Jungkook. They even slept together!” Jimin remarks finally sitting down after dancing by himself for the past twenty minutes.

“And it was fucking horrible. High five!” Jungkook leans over the coffee table to slap his hand against yours, the two of you giggling.

“What kind of incestuous group is this?” Namjoon remarked, sipping his drink before turning to you where he watched you leaned over the table as you still slapped your hand against Jungkook’s to the beat of the music. “So when’s my turn?”

“Excuse me?” You recoil away from Namjoon, almost jumping in Hoseok’s lap. Oh here it was; stage two of your drunk persona, anger. You felt it coursing in your veins at his insinuation. “Who the fuck do you think I am?”

“Apparently the group dick toucher.” He smirked again, that annoying lopsided smile that made his one dimple deepen in his cheek. “I promise I won’t be flaccid like Hobi was.”

“Okay! Y/N and I are going on a walk!” Hoseok exclaimed as he saw your fist clenched. He knew you were ten seconds away from punching Namjoon in the face, and he put his arms around your waist and easily hoisted you up, walking you to the front door.

“Hobi I swear to god, I’m gonna murder him.” You glared at Namjoon as he returned your heated stare with an easy smile and a wave.

“I know babe. So we’re going on a walk. Let’s go pick up some food, yeah?”

The two of you walked around the block to the nearest McDonalds, picking up an assortment of cheeseburgers and chicken nuggets for the party, even getting Namjoon what he wanted, despite your burning desire that he starve to death. By the time, you returned to the party and took a couple more shots you were sufficiently cheered up. Hoseok had that affect on you, calming your mood with his jokes and anecdotes. 

Cuddled with Hoseok as you sat between his legs on the couch, the two of you shared a vape as you let the weed settle in your bones with a mellow buzz. Jimin sat in front of you on the floor, leaning against you as you ran your hands through his hair, enjoying the soft fluff. You were so glad that he had decided to forego his usual hair wax today. You felt like you were in utter bliss, your annoyance with Namjoon long forgotten. That is until you tuned into his conversation with Jungkook - not that you had any choice, because even though he seemed to be talking to Jungkook, his eyes were pointed at you.

“I’m just saying capitalism is the reason you’re sitting here in this nice home. People who can’t afford healthcare or education just need to work harder. That’s how life works.” Namjoon sipped his drink, raising an eyebrow at you, and you decidedly ignored his baiting. It was like he was trying to get you mad on purpose. You didn’t understand his gameplan. Why couldn’t he just let you enjoy bringing in 2017 like an adult?

“Dude… why are we even talking about this?” Jungkook groaned, face scrunching in distaste.

“I’m just saying people shouldn’t look for a handout when there are literally thousands of skills they could learn to make their lives easier. Why are we using our tax dollars for the lazy?” Namjoon shrugged nonchalantly, his gaze boring holes into you as you stared him down. Oh curse your stupid resolve, why did this fucker know you so well, you literally just met! Before you could stop yourself, you were speaking.

“I’m sorry, are you stupid? That is literally the dumbest thing I’ve ever heard. Education and healthcare are a human right!” Your voice was louder than usual, startling Hoseok and Jimin as you suddenly stood up, walking over to where a smug looking Namjoon and a confused Jungkook sat on the floor.

“I’m not, but you must be, to not realize that we could invest in teaching people skills to make money instead of just giving them money. Don’t tell me you’re a communist.” He sipped his drink, his eyes dancing with mirth, relishing the fact that he had gotten you to argue. And argue you did, for over an hour, the room forgotten as the two of you discussed social policies and taxation laws, ignoring Jungkook’s protests (“We live in a social democracy!”). You could feel the fire in your veins as you raised your voice, while he calmly discussed the matter at hand. Even though Namjoon was the most infuriating person you had ever met, the fact that he kept up with your arguments was extremely satisfying. Your friends knew you were the kind of person to debate a point until all the sides were uncovered so they would never start an argument with you, and as much as you hated Namjoon, you loved that he was such a great sparring partner.

“Oh my god! Shut the fuck up!” Jimin yelled suddenly, breaking you and Namjoon out of your bubble, as you looked at your usually bubbly friend, staring daggers at you. You sheepishly apologized, just as the countdown began.

Everyone stood and you followed suit. However the alcohol in your body decided to catch up as you stumbled, instinctively grabbing on to Namjoon’s arm to not fall over. As you’ve started to realize is his ammo, he one-upped you, putting his arm around your waist and pulling you into his chest. Fuck, why does it feel so nice and firm?

The countdown got closer to one and you felt trapped by his gaze, an intense look in his eye as he smirked at you. His eyes travelled from your eyes to your lips and you felt as if your chest was getting tighter.

“Three!” your friends yelled, but your mouth felt too dry to speak up. You licked your lips and Namjoon’s smirk widened. Why did you find his arrogant face so attractive all of a sudden? You wanted to punch him not two seconds ago!

“Two!” He started to lean in and despite yourself, you started anticipating his lips on yours. 

“One!” Suddenly, your earlier resolve kicked in. No dude who insulted you all night was going to touch you. You pushed him off turning around to Jungkook.

“Happy New Year!” You pulled your best friend towards you by his collar, giving him a loud peck on the lips as everyone cheered. Jungkook smiled, pulling you into a hug and jostling you around, giving you a chance to catch the dumbfounded look on Namjoon’s face.

You hugged all of your friends in turn, and when Namjoon, still with his mouth slightly ajar, looked at you expectantly, you raised your hand to him with a smug smile. You kind of felt bad for the way he deflated before he shook your hand, but before you could dwell too much on that feeling, he tugged you closer.

“Well played,” he whispered in your ear, his breath ghosting your neck, and you felt heat rising up your neck. You pulled away with a scowl and before he could say anything else, your phone pinged, the screen lit with the last name you wanted to see.

Taehyung (3 messages)

Oh great. What did the fuck did he want?

-

masterlist | next

I hope you liked this! Let me know what you think. For more of my works visit my masterlist!