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silverstarfics · 2 years ago

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Me? Posting this a day late? Nooo, totally not. Shhh, it’s definitely still the 21st June and I absolutely haven’t missed @thunder-pride bisexual day...

Okay, fine. I started writing at 23:30 and by the time I finished this I was too tired to proof it. But hey, it’s finally here! Welcome to the Scott/Tycho fic that was meant to be funny but somehow ended up being angsty? Why am I even surprised anymore...

AO3 link

Tonight was a classic example of why Scott hated PR events. Nearly everybody was fake – letting expensive labels speak for them or sucking up in the hopes of a power grab – and there were eyes everywhere. There was no escape.

And it should have been easier because at least this time he’d had an ally in the room, only they couldn’t be seen to be talking because the press were already sniffing around and they both knew that their relationship would be a big conversation.

Scott was determined to keep it private for as long as possible. He’d been through this before. Every time the tabloid headlines proved too much for his partners and the relationship inevitably crashed and burned. He refused to let it happen again. Not this time. Especially not when he’d really started to fall for a certain person.

“Are you still sulking?” Tycho discarded his suit jacket as though it were a used tissue rather than a very expensive example of Italian tailoring. “Because if anyone has the right to sulk, it’s me. I had to watch a lot of very pretty women flirting with my boyfriend.”

It was a relief to be home. Scott finally let the tension drain from his shoulders as he glanced at Tycho over the kitchen island. Tycho flopped grandly onto the couch and offered him a sunny smile which proved that he wasn’t truly annoyed. If anything, there was a hint of concern in his eyes.

“Five hours,” Scott complained. It was possible that he was being a little overdramatic. “Five hours of corporate bullshit. Do you know what’s even worse? I had to flirt back. Just for appearances’ sake. Because the PR team say I have an image to maintain.”

“Business is better when the CEO is hot and single.”

“Yay,” he deadpanned. “So, I have to pretend to be perpetually single. Great.”

Tycho leaned back against the couch with a fond smile. “I feel like you’re focussing on the wrong part. Take it as a compliment.”

“Nah, Scotty’s crap at that,” Gordon piped up, seemingly materialising out of thin air. It was approaching one in the morning, so there was no reason for him to be in the pool, but he had a yellow towel slung around his shoulders and was steadily dripping water onto the floorboards.

Tycho jumped. “How many times do we have to discuss this? Stop sneaking up on me.”

Gordon’s grin was full of teeth. “It’s an initiation process. When you get used to it, you’re officially a part of the family.”

“Do I want to be? Seems like a nightmare.”

“Oh, yeah, it totally is,” Gordon confirmed. “But dating Scooter means you get all of us too. It’s a joint package. It’s great fun! Just wait until John does creepy shit like randomly appearing above the holoprojector in your room at five in the morning.”

“Gordon,” Scott sighed.

Tycho raised a brow. “John’s going to do what now?”

“John is not going to do anything,” Scott cut in with a meaningful glare at the nearest projector.

Even if their Eye in the Sky wasn’t awake, EOS would undoubtedly pass the message along. It was bad enough dealing with his planet-based siblings, let alone John’s various schemes. The second his family had realised he was actually serious about this relationship, they’d taken it upon themselves to check if Tycho was suitable, to quote. It was funny right up until Kayo’s overprotective streak had made an appearance. Tycho probably still had nightmares.

Gordon sidled across the floor, then whispered something to Tycho. Scott knew that distinctly mischievous grin. He knew it all too well. It was always the precursor to trouble. It was made so much worse by the way Tycho’s face lit up with a slowly dawning smile.

Scott eyed them suspiciously “What?”

“Nothing,” Gordon sing songed. “I’m just… you know. Catching up. Becoming besties. Reminding Tycho of the way you become a flustered mess whenever someone you genuinely like flirts with you.”

Scott stared at him for a long moment. “That’s such crap. And why are you even here? Go to bed and stop bothering us.”

“Uh huh. Okay. Sure.” Gordon made no attempt to move. “You are the worst at taking compliments.”

“I am not-” Scott took a steadying breath. “I get compliments all the time. Such as this evening.”

“Nope. Doesn’t count. I’m talking about genuine compliments.”

“Shut up, Gordon.”

“No, no.” Tycho had a wicked grin on his face. “Keep going.”

Gordon let out a delighted laugh. “Oh, really? Well then. Scott will have, like, an actual meltdown if you tell him-”

“Gordon, I swear to God, I’m gonna disinherit you. I’ll do it. Just one more word and I’ll call my lawyer.”

“Do it, I dare you.”

“You think I’m bluffing?”

“I think you’ll turn the same shade as Three if Tycho says you did a good job tonight.”

The situation was swiftly spiralling out of control. Scott let out a loud, obviously fake laugh and tried to play it off as casual. He glared at Gordon, trying to communicate an increasingly desperate hope for him to leave, because sure, maybe this was hilarious to the squid, but Scott kind of wanted to sink through the floor and maybe burn up in the Earth’s mantle right now.

It was made worse by the way Tycho’s smile faltered as he glimpsed Scott’s genuine unease. “Wait. This isn’t just a joke?”

“Can we not… not do this?” Scott gripped the edge of the counter until his knuckles paled. His voice sounded horribly strained even to his own ears. “I’m sure it’s really funny, but I think I lost my sense of humour about three hours ago. So. Can we just… not?”

Gordon’s amusement faded. “I didn’t mean-”

“I don’t care what you meant, Gordon.” Scott cursed the hint of betrayal which had crept into his tone. He snatched his discarded jacket from the counter and shouldered past his brother which hadn’t been his best idea to date given Gordon was still soaking wet. “It’s late. I’m going to bed. I’ll see you in the morning.”

“Scott,” Tycho called, voice pitched with honest concern.

“Scooter? C’mon, I was just joking around. I didn’t mean it seriously.” Gordon’s bare feet smacked against the floorboards as he broke into a jog to catch up. “Hey, Scott! Jeez, would you wait up for a second?”

“What?” Scott whirled on him. Gordon’s eyes widened as the shout faded in the dark corridor. For all the times he’d driven Scott up the wall, it was still rare for him to actually snap. “What is it now?”

Gordon hesitated. “I just wanted to-”

“Wanted to what? Make another joke? At my expense? Jokes are supposed to be funny. I don’t know, maybe you do find it funny. It’s hilarious that I can’t take compliments because the only time anyone gives me one is when they want something from me. Go ahead and laugh. But I’ve had a shit evening so I’m having a few problems seeing the humour in it.”

The silence dragged on for a painfully long minute.

“You never told me that,” Gordon whispered.

“Then congrats. Now you know.”

Scott wasn’t angry as such – mostly just hurt because Gordon’s jokes rarely crossed the line into downright cruel – and so still experienced a rush of regret because his little brother looked as though he’d been slapped.

“Get some sleep, Gords,” he muttered, more softly this time. “It’s okay.”

“I’m sorry.”

“I know.”

“No, Scott, really. I’m sorry.”

“Yeah, bud,” he sighed. “I know you are.”

“Are we okay?”

“Are we…? Of course we are.” He shook his head at the sight of Gordon’s relieved smile. “Dumbass.”

What might not have been alright was his relationship, but that was an issue he didn’t want to consider until he’d slept for a few hours. He retreated to his room and finally changed out of the cursed suit. He was still trying to coax creases out of the jacket when the door closed and he sensed another’s presence in the room. He didn’t need to turn around to know who it was.

“I considered giving you some space,” Tycho began cautiously, “But then I couldn’t help myself.” There was something unbearably gentle in his voice. “I’m sorry.”

“Why?” Scott didn’t look up from the jacket. He’d crumpled more creases into the fabric by curling his fists in it but he didn’t know how else to control the wealth of feeling in his chest. “You didn’t do anything wrong. Gordon poked at a subject he knows I’m uncomfortable with, that’s all.”

He could sense Tycho standing just a few feet away, uncertain as to how to proceed. It was the wrong side of too late to even think anymore, but Scott was reluctant to postpone this conversation until tomorrow. He’d done this before. He knew how it went.

People liked the idea of him – the persona carefully curated for the public – but fled as soon as they glimpsed the broken pieces beneath the mask. But he hated how much it was going to hurt this time. It was almost enough to make him turn around and pretend that there’d been no harm done, that it had just been an overreaction on his half, anything to give him just a few more hours of being loved.

“If you want to leave,” he said heavily, “I won’t hold it against you.”

Tycho visibly double took. “Sorry, what? Why would I want to…? I’m very confused right now, which is rare for me. What is this? What are you doing?”

“I’m giving you an easy out. I won’t judge you for taking it.”

“I don’t want out. I want you. I’ve made that very clear over the past couple of months.”

“Yeah, well.” Scott still couldn’t look at him. “Everyone wants me until they realise- I’m not easy to love. I get that. There’s always a point when people recognise that I’m more than they signed up for. And they leave. So, if you’re going to do that, I’d rather you did so now, because it’s already gonna hurt like hell and it’ll only get worse the longer you stay.”

“Scott.”

“I’m not going to do… this. Just- Okay, it’s late, so don’t leave, but there’s a spare room down the hall. I can drop you home tomorrow.”

“Would you let me get a word in edgeways?” Tycho’s fond exasperation was tainted by concern. He stepped closer to brush a hand against Scott’s arm. “It’s very easy to love you. It’s a little harder to know you, I’ll admit that, but only because you’re constantly trying to keep from letting anyone in. But loving you? That’s not a challenge.”

Scott searched for his voice and found only a pathetically small croak. “Okay.”

Tycho’s tiny huff suggested that he was trying to hold back a laugh. “Okay?”

“Yeah. I mean… I don’t know what to say to that.”

“Look at me?” Tycho’s murmur seemed so very loud in their silent room. And that thought in itself was a rush because when had his become theirs? “Please?”

Scott finally dropped the jacket onto the chair and twisted to face him. He was hyperaware of his own heartbeat – frantic with fear because vulnerability was so much worse than a dangerous rescue – and the burn behind his eyes. Tycho took a final step closer, running a hand up his arm to cradle his face – no judgement, just pure affection – and he wasn’t sure what to do with that acceptance.

“This entire time,” Tycho continued softly, “I’ve been worried that you’ll call this off. Because the first time we met, you were risking your life for mine. How can I possibly match up to that? If you look up hero in the dictionary, you’ll find your name beside it. Now, me? I have ideas. Fantastic, revolutionary ideas. But I’m not selfless. I don’t pretend to be. So, it baffles me that out of the two of us, you’re the one who believes he’s difficult to love.”

Scott lowered his forehead to Tycho’s shoulder. Fingers curled around the nape of his neck, easing away tension, moving to run through his hair. He exhaled shakily and let himself be held.

“You’re clever. You’re compassionate. You’re remarkable. I could go on for hours.” Tycho’s smile was audible in his voice as he added, “Oh, and by the way? You did a great job tonight.”

Scott swatted him half-heartedly. “Shut up.”

“You know I had to say it.”

“Hmm.”

“I love you,” Tycho promised. “And I’m not going anywhere. Even if your brothers do try to give me the shovel talk every time I visit.”

“Oh, god.”

“Alan’s the worst offender which makes it harder because I always want to laugh. He’s just not intimidating in the slightest. That being said, I do agree with them. If I hurt you at all, I will happily hand myself over so that Kayo can complete her oddly specific list of threats.”

Scott gave a tired laugh. “They mean well.”

Tycho shot him an affectionate smile. “I know they do. They love you. And so do I.”

#i do find it funny that i missed the day of my own identity #i was like ah yes bi day well i know what I'm writing for that so i'll definitely be on time #uh huh sure kat sure #in my defence... i have no defence #also why am i incapable of writing scott without angst creeping in??#sorry scotty #it's very important that you know i was giggling to myself at the idea of alan trying to give tycho the shovel talk #thunderpride #thunderpride 2023 #thunderbirds are go

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makeste · 4 years ago

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BnHA Chapter 328: Pandora’s Box of Discourse

Previously on BnHA: DEKU TOOK A BATH.

Today on BnHA:

youtube

Also Naomasa grew a beard. Goddamn.

please let this be a cool chapter that plays nice with my ADHD lol

(ETA: lol I feel guilty because a lot of people hated this chapter, but I’m just happy there was a lot of stuff to make fun of, and also that I have another week to work on my backlog of meta posts since the kids were MIA.)

around one month ago?? ah, okay, so we’re gonna find out what was in that Tartarus security file huh

I love that they just randomly set the place on fire

was it necessary to do this in order to escape? no. was it a good idea to set the island they were occupying on fire while they were in the midst of still occupying it? uh. was it cinematic as fuck? fuck yeah

wow it’s a pervert!!

that’s so great that the villains set loose this fine fellow who I’m sure is definitely not a serial rapist. truly the LoV is so noble and misunderstood. they’re just trying to free society from its chains people

oh my god??!

SHANKED!!! oh my god I cheered for Stain before I realized what I was doing. time to have an identity crisis I guess

so he’s all “hey what’s going on.” which, while a respectable question, is something I personally would have waited to ask until I had put a bit of distance between myself and the fiery murder island. but that’s just my personal preference

Stain you really are tenacious I’ll give you that

“what’s the point of escaping prison if you’re not gonna be smart about it” well shit. anyways yeah you’re dead right, society is in the process of collapsing and the outside world is in total chaos, good call there

oh shit

I mean it’s not like we really expecting anything otherwise, but still. fucking brutal. I feel like these guys’ fates were decided the minute that one guy called AFO “scum” back in chapter 94. AFO is unmatched at getting long-term revenge

ahh, was it the security footage??

fdsdfk he’s still alive??

and he’s immediately launching into an inappropriately theatrical monologue even as the darkness closes in on him fdlfksjdlk. you know, was it ever confirmed that the other guy back in chapter 297 was Seiji’s dad? I’m just saying

very impressed that he’s still coherent enough to weigh the pros and cons before making the decision to gamble on giving this info to Stain, who at the very least has his own moral code and isn’t allied with AFO. it was definitely still a risk, but as we now know it was also the right call

what a weird alliance. so Stain tells him that he’ll give it to a just person, and the guy is all,

okay for real though I’m gonna need someone to run a DNA test on this guy. maybe it was some kind of cuckold situation?? the other guy had the family resemblance, but this guy absolutely 100% raised Shishikura Seiji and you are not going to convince me otherwise

anyway, so Stain is all,

PRISON GUARD: “???? ??????? what the hell. what the fuck does that fucking mean. I’m dying here, jesus christ, whatever man fuck you”

(ETA: I kind of feel like this might have been Stain’s last appearance in the manga, given all the fanfare. there’s not really much else he can do for the story at this point, and he seems to have gotten all the character development Horikoshi was planning on giving him. so if this really is it, hasta la vista and good riddance I guess.)

DWLFDKSLDK MEANWHILE, OUTSIDE

(ETA: I feel like this is meant to be evocative of that Sermon on the Mount painting, but in a really fucked up way lol.)

if it were me stumbling upon this scene I would just shake my head and walk right back into the flaming building. not getting involved in that mess. sorry not sorry. I’ll take my chances with the fire, especially given that it’s half-assed neutered BnHA fire lol

blah blah blah and so he decided to pass the info on to All Might -- HOT DAMN, HOLY SHIT

NAOMASA HOLY SHIT. THE APOCALYPSE LOOKS GOOD ON YOU, BOY

“I really like that facial scruff thing Aizawa’s got going on, I think I’m gonna get in on that” yes sir. “also thinking of ditching the tie in favor of the bulletproof vest look. also thinking of getting totally fucking jacked.” good lord. except I’m pretty sure that’s just body armor, but also I don’t care. anyway I should probably stop staring and actually read the fucking speech bubbles here lol

“All Might first handed this information over to Nao, and then went to see Deku, and then came back to Nao” thanks for that tidy little summary Horikoshi. we are capable of piecing events together in sequential order, I just want you to know that. but thank you

“so has Deku finally gotten a bath? also, sucks that Stain saved the day, but what are you gonna do” Nao I missed you so fucking much and didn’t even realize. how am I just now realizing that you are the perfect man

for a second I was gonna ask why Tartarus’s security systems would be cut off from the outside world, and then I remembered that’s a basic security control, and then I actually got impressed by how sensible that is. like, it’s been a while since I could genuinely say that the good guys (excluding class 1-A) did something smart. not that it helped them much in the end, but still

anyway so they’re talking about how AFO was able to coordinate the attack by communicating between his horcrux self on the outside and his ugly peanut-faced self on the inside

huh

okay you have my attention. I am taking notes here lol please continue

ah okay so he says that prior to Jakku, the transfer of information between him and his Vestige self was only one-way. but post-Jakku when Deku was in the hospital, he was able to tell what was happening inside the OFA Radical Lisa Frank Dead People Book Club Realm when he touched him. I feel like we established that before, actually. but he didn’t talk about how it actually felt, though

boy we already know this lol. yes AFO can talk with his horcrux self. and he can also communicate with his little bro in OFA too, let’s talk about that sometime why don’t we. what exactly does that imply, based on the rules we’ve established here

my god I cannot get over Naomasa and his fucking facial hair

no wonder All Might was in such a hurry to leave Deku and get back here

like I have no idea what this radio waves nonsense is but my god, people

that jawline. also so it’s a quirk, I see. except last I checked Deku didn’t have a radio waves quirk, so that doesn’t really explain his connection to AFO. but whatever, hopefully we’re at least getting closer to some kind of reveal here

(ETA: since I sometimes forget that other people’s lives don’t revolve around my theory posts, here are the two relevant links if you by chance want to know my thoughts about this.

Hagakure is still The U.A. Traitor™ regardless of whether Deku is passing information on to AFO through his psychic link, which he almost certainly is.

speaking of said psychic link, Deku is a horcrux.

just posting these now, because whenever trippy OFA stuff happens I tend to get an influx of theory asks. so hopefully this will be a bit of a time saver lol.)

-- wait, what

THAT’S what the recording was??!? holy SHIT. I genuinely was not expecting that. y’all wiretapped his fucking telepathy. fucking quirks, man. wild

AND THEY USED THAT POWER TO DETERMINE WHAT WE ALREADY KNEW, HUZZAH. GOOD SHOW

-- oh shit wait lol, except I forgot we’re not talking about 38 days from the present, we’re talking about 38 days from the date the conversation was recorded. heh. um

yeah that’s the face I would make too if All Fucking Might just casually told me we had eight days left until the end times

oh, pardon me. three fucking days

r.i.p. anyone who thought we were going to have another band arc sob. I sure hope Deku is enjoying that nap

(ETA: I realize people were hoping for a longer rest period here, but given that the man warned us all the way back in chapter 306 that we were entering the final act, you can’t really blame him too much when that turns out to be true. anyway but I do recognize that we’ve reached the point in the story where this kind of discourse is going to become a weekly occurrence, simply because there’s no possible way for Horikoshi’s actual endgame to line up perfectly with the variable headcanons of millions of fans, all of whom have wildly differing and in many cases contradictory expectations which can’t possibly all be fulfilled. anyway, so I’m already bracing myself for that lol. this coming year is going to be a wild ride.)

damn, U.A. out here looking like the motherfucking United Nations

-- is this U.A.?? I actually just realized, U.A. is four interconnected buildings, not two. wait holy shit is this Shiketsu?

wait holy SHIT

based on the overwhelmingly powerful vibes of bureaucratic incompetence, I’m thinking this really is the (future) U.N., or whatever organization it is that deals with international hero stuff

“just let them handle it themselves I’m sure they’ll be fine” yeah okay, thanks guys. appreciate it

wait oh shit did he say that it’s not just Japan?

soooo, what you’re telling me is that AFO is this close to bringing about the end of not just Japan, but the entire world, and you guys don’t think it’s a good idea to help the Japanese heroes stop him? so, genuine follow-up question: are you guys already planning your rich people exodus into space a la Wall-E, and that’s why you don’t give a fuck?? like, what??

omg international heroes

these guys are from World Hoodie Mission, right? is this Horikoshi’s way of reminding me to buy tickets

(ETA: and it worked too lol.)

WHO??? WHAT???

don’t tell me you’re introducing yet another badass new female character for me to fall in love with only to watch as you dismember them and/or blow them up, Horikoshi. I’m getting tired of playing this game my dude. don’t lie and tell me this time will be different. we’re not doing this again goddammit

noooooooooooooooooooo

god fucking dammit lmao. [sighs and rips the previous paragraph into shreds]

on behalf of Americans I apologize for our superheroes always being Like This

I also apologize because I love her already and I’m gonna be shameless about it. so fucking shameless you guys

is her fucking hair red white and blue. it is, isn’t it

this is the volume cliffhanger, 100% lol. it will take every ounce of Horikoshi’s willpower not to put her on the volume cover. he’ll have to settle for the spine or the inner cover this time because Deku VS his class 1-a superpals takes precedence. but it will be a close thing let me tell you

tbh it’s that smile that does it for me. she’s definitely All Might’s protege. get out there and show them how it’s done girl. and maybe call Salaam and BRD and see if you can’t convince them to play hooky from their governments as well. why not. world’s ending in three days you guys. “sorry, I’m busy this weekend” ain’t gonna cut it lol

so while I am not fully caught up with Vigilantes, I have read far enough to know that there’s an American hero named Captain Celebrity whose superpower from what I recall is being a humongous douchebag. and while I haven’t read far enough to know what happens to this guy, I can’t say I’m very disappointed to learn that he’s no longer the number one hero in the U.S. (actually, didn’t they kick him out and that’s why he moved to Japan to begin with?). anyway, so my thanks to Horikoshi for having a marginally higher opinion of Americans than Furuhashi, even though we have definitely not done anything to warrant said opinion lately, and you may have inadvertently opened the door to a pandora’s box of discourse lmao

(ETA: lol I went into the tags and they don’t disappoint. “why is she dressed like a flag” because she’s an homage to Captain America and Major Victory and literally every other character on this list. again, I apologize for fictional American superheroes being Like This. “oh boy another thicc waifu to make the fanboys happy” look, tumblr fandom never seems to have a problem thirsting over Dabi or Tomura or Aizawa or Nao, lol, I’m just saying. “where is Captain Celebrity” idk, probably murdered by the exploding bee cartel, let’s just be grateful for our good fortune and try not to Beetlejuice the man.)

anyway, so let’s see if Horikoshi’s recent character development with regards to making Mineta not terrible anymore will apply to other aspects of his writing as well. I know I was making light of discourse just now, but I do think the complaints about him introducing yet another new character at the 11th hour to be cannon fodder in the final battle are absolutely valid. and again, it wouldn’t be a problem if he didn’t keep maiming/killing off his female characters one by one instead of developing them and letting them kick ass long-term. but that said, I will never complain about Horikoshi adding another female character to the series, regardless of how clumsy the attempt may be. go ahead and pander away, just give us more girl power lol

anyway so we’ll see how it goes, but I think I’m gonna be optimistic and let myself hope once again, even though I’m probably gonna regret it lol. it is what it is. she is standing on an airplane just chilling for fuck’s sake. I’m only human. anyway fingers crossed

#bnha 328 #stain (bnha)#tsukauchi naomasa #all might #stars and stripes (bnha)#all for one #bnha #boku no hero academia #bnha spoilers #mha spoilers #bnha manga spoilers #makeste reads bnha #eta: how did I forget to type 'bnha' in the title sob

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luminalunii97 · 3 years ago

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Ok so I just read this post (plus tags on replies and all, because I love Love) but this, I can't stop thinking about!

I really don't want to be a party pooper and ruin the uplifting feelings that post brings, and I do enjoy it when love is expressed through actions more than words, but...

Call me cynical, but upon reading the poem I couldn't not notice something being wrong here, and the poem is what I'm going to focus on here.

So we're all familiar with toxic masculinity, how society is ruled by it, how men are policed by it, and how their mental health is tremendously affected by it. I see those effects in this poem.

The guy is obsessed with plane crashes. And this is an unhealthy obsession, especially after you learn why. He loves his brother, he doesn't want to lose him, but his brother is a pilot, which in nature is a risky job. So he's anxious. God knows how he feels every time his brother has a fly, or every time there's a plane crash on the news. But he doesn't have a healthy outlet for all of this worrying and anxiety.

Imagine a scenario where he's a typical woman. She's dealing with the same amount of love and followed-up anxiety. But she is allowed to have an outlet that is way more healthy than developing an obsession over death and plane crashes.

In a society where the definition of being a 'man' is based on toxic masculinity, a man cannot express his love and emotions clearly and straightforwardly with words. Whereas she's allowed to pick up the phone and talk it out. Maybe call her brother to tell him she loves him randomly! He also doesn't have access to an emotionally supportive group of friends, because men don't do that, they don't have heart-to-heart with friends. They don't talk about their emotional problems with friends, because they're not allowed to feel those emotions in the first place according to society's crazy standards. So what he's going through here is like a dirty secret where it shouldn't be.

I wonder if I'm right, if he has never talked about how he feels about all of this with his brother or a friend. Even here, he doesn't directly address these feelings to the narrator. So I doubt he's ever talked about them out loud.

I said earlier, imagine he's a typical woman instead of a man, mainly because this love language is not preserved for men, women can be like that too. My own mom for example. She was born and raised in a household mostly consisting of boys. She could follow her sister's steps but sentimentality caused my aunt to be constantly mocked and hurt by others whereas my mother could gain respect instead of that by imitating her brothers. To this day my mother cannot say I love you or talk about her feelings that are not anger or frustration. But she tries so hard to do anything she can to show us that she does care about us. She's affected by toxic masculinity even though she's not a man. Of course this doesn't apply to everyone and definitely not every story in that post. It's just my perception of the poem.

So "I love the way men love" is such a bittersweet statement. I see the beauty in showing your soft side with actions even if society demands you to be aggressive and not soft at all but this very same demand caused most men to be like that in the first place.

I love it if they show love with actions rather than words but I hate it if toxicity forced them into it.

[don't take this post too seriously, I'm sleep deprived and I'm thinking too much. But my heart is in the right place I promise!]

#i love the way men love #poetry #men #love #toxic masculinity #healthy society #emotions #sentimentality #actions over words #I love you but not in so many words #humanity #people

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hungrydolphin91 · 3 years ago

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Guess who randomly told me they wanted to play Xillia 2?? Yep, it's my lovely 30 year old overworked and stressed sister, who said she didn't want to start a long game just a week ago. Caught me by surprise but onto the next title, hurrah!!!!

An account of our let's play beginning below the cut:

I gave her a bit of a warning of how this game is a departure from the first game (and series in general) so she had some slight spoilers going in. She also saw me play it a bit my first time, remembering Elle and Nova's annoying voices in particular

I asked her why she wanted to play the sequel. Her: "I want to see more of the jazz land." She was disappointed you rush through Elympios, and X2 does at least add a little to it.

Got to laugh at her a little when the game opened immediately on a fight. Her: "Who am I fighting, my shadow self??"

Already her hearing issues are causing problems. "What'd he say his name is, 'Liquor'?"

She hates his name, "Ludger." It would be a fine for an actual person but for a character it's silly, you could have picked a better name.

Her: "I'm gonna call him 'Clout.'" Me: " ....... like 'posting-on-the-internet-for-clout' Clout?" Her: "Yeah, he's an influencer, look at his hair! He has an ombre!"

I told her it's dyed, and that I couldn't remember whether the black or the white was the dyed part. It's a little spoilery to talk about yet, but she noticed how Nova and Rideaux have it too. Her: "It must be the fashion." Me: "Cause he's an influencer."

Also heard Ludger saying "Okay!" as "Croquet!" Me: "Why would he be saying that after a battle??" Her: "I don't know, he's weird, he makes tomato cupcakes!!" Me: "Touche."

Her: "Whoah, Elle's dad turned into a monster?? Are we going to fight him someday?" Me: [silence]

We were talking during the bit after failing the test. Her: "Bro, stop humming." Me: "That's plot-relevant humming [it really is]. But we should probably pay attention to the TV that's giving exposition."

She loves the cat already. Who doesn't, Rollo is the best 😸

Seeing that we are in Trigleph she immediately tried to visit Balan. Me: "Why would we even go there, he doesn't know us." Her: "He's going to kickstart our adventure, I just know it."

You can actually go into his apartment which I didn't know, but no one is home. Her: "Does he know he left his house unlocked??"

After running into Jude, she immediately picked the non-affinity building choice. Me: "None of your friends are going to like you if you always pick the mean choice." Her: "I have decided to be mean. I am Aloof-ger."

Also decided she doesn't care about her friends, just Julius. Me: "There's actually an ending like that." Her: "Oh, a bad ending?" Me: "And then you rule the world together. Just kidding." Her: "Aww..." [this was me being an idiot and lying to cover my tracks. It's too early for spoilers]

She immediately hated Elle, as I knew she would. I just can't get myself to like Elle much either, so I am also dog piling the Elle-hate train. Sorry Elle lovers :(

Calling Bisley and his squad "the new Chimeriad." They are at least the new villains, but not as memorable to me as the Chimeriad. Calling Nova's sister (I forget her name) the new Presa just for having glasses and being serious.

Her: "His name is 'Bisley'? Seriously?" Me: "He's the bee's lees."

Devastated to learn the shops don't expand in this game. Me: "They don't in any game except Xillia to my knowledge." Her: :(

"Did we just go back in time?" Given how the power comes from a pocketwatch that's a very logical conclusion to make, I thought the same thing.

Her: "Everything's weird here. There's like a sepia filter. He really is an influencer."

Learned Julius and Ludger are only half brothers. Upon seeing Julius's fractured form, asked "Was the other half demon??"

But Ludger has a weird form too. Maybe he's quarter demon.

I forgot how easy that Julius fight is, compared to the later ones. Also, he drops tomato omelette. He should have dropped mabo curry, since that's what Ludger offered to make for breakfast [though of course this is a fractured dimension]

Upon seeing Rideaux in the bar: "Who is this clown? He looks like the Joker." Believes he might also be a vampire, as he has orange eyes and weird hair

You can apparently go behind the bar counter and just start taking alcohol. Me: "Let's get Rideaux drunk so he forgets about our debt."

Characters are talking about Canaan and Kresnik. Her: "Is he the Lance of Kresnik? Should I start calling him Lance?" Me: "Please don't, that's such a dude bro name."

Getting annoyed at Nova for too for calling to collect the debt money. Her: "Just try to collect my money, I have two swords!" Me: "One for each annoying girl." [I despise Nova too.]

It is satisfying to cut her off. Imagining hanging up by snapping shut the flip phone.

She wants to pay her debts back one gald at a time. Me: "Oh no this is like the shop expansion all over again."

I forgot the debt also keeps you from traveling. It's pretty fucked up actually, especially since Ludger literally can't go home now.

So we're back in the field with the sexy sax music. Alvin is playing it here with us in spirit 😔.

We left off by finishing the first chunk of our loan. Next time we'll board a train home and see what happens, maybe more party members?? 👀

Masterpost link for X2 and Xillia 1 here.

#tales of xillia 2 #ive also been telling her some of the trivia v's been unearthing about x2 #im not writing it every time here but you can assume every time elle is on screen my sister is wishing terrible events to befall her #it's nice to be revisiting this game i do miss it #i have some issues with it but its quite fun to play #dolphin plays x2

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strawberryjamsara · 4 years ago

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I want to hear the entirety of your Sara analysis. I need to brainrot

Aaaaah��. I don’t exactly have a full on analysis planned out so this is gonna be just scattered thoughts.

First of all, we have never seen her straight up interact with Mr. Chidouin and the more we see of him and the more we learn about her, the more I’m becoming firmly set that Mr Chidouin is a villainous player. First of all, the fact a teenage girl, some dorky kid who loves cute uniforms and making stupid jokes, is somehow going into simulations for a game that is somehow meant to revolve around her and being a merciless killer, to the point the organization can’t control her…. To the point she’s high ranking over the adults, people like Qtaro…. And again, when there’s so many hints the game is made for her that she somehow has the perfect personality type for it…. Something is fucking up. Someone also mentioned in a post of mine that when in Kais emails it’s mentioned that Mr Chidouin wants to leave the house behind, Sara says she didn’t hear of any plans implying that was just testing Kai’s loyalty whether it was to Mr Chidouin or Sara. And with the implication that Meister wrote the memorandum that adds a whole new layer of uncomfortable! Basically, Sara is an abuse victim in this essay I will-

Okay but moving on, I also want to talk about the significance of not just Joe but everyone in the death games influence on Sara. Although Joe is the most important. It’s very significant that Sara doesn’t use the key on herself in the first trial. Because Joe is her best friend. Joe has already handicapped her, because of how much she cares that she’s willing to put her life on the line and her trust in him so he turns out alright. And…. As much as I hate to reference it, this scene is expanded upon in the manga. She thinks of taking the key at first but can’t because it’s Joe. Joe is her human anchor. Her bond with and grief for him also do a lot to push her towards other people (she was willing to pull her gun out on Alice but Joe wanted to trust him, Gins counciling for her grief, their talk with Mishima, etc) There’s also several other people who factor in to her ability to keep hold on herself who weren’t accounted for, and one person who she might not have been able to make a bond with if it weren’t for Joe.

Reko- So Reko was a very important person to Sara, but I don’t think this was the case in the simulations. The AI of Reko was 2 years behind, and didn’t have her current kind personality. Our Reko often encourages Sara, wants to take responsibility off of her, and cares for her like a big sister. That switch up in personality I think does a lot for Sara.

Nao- Nao is an ASTRONOMICAL factor in keeping Sara grounded. Nao in many cases is willing to bear the weight of Sara’s pain, such as by pushing the fake Reko for her, or in the massacre ending where she is willing to bear the burden of everyone’s deaths for her. I also want to point out a very important scene: the monitor room. When Sara says “I’ve really lost it haven’t I?” Nao takes Sara in close and says “You haven’t lost anything.” It’s important that when Sara feels shes slipping off the deep end she hears someone tell her she’s perfectly okay. God, they mean the world to me…

And now the big one….

Keiji- Honestly I have enough thoughts on Keiji and Sara for its own analysis so I’ll try and not go off on a tangent. Sara is initially suspicious of Keiji because why wouldn’t she be? He randomly comes up to her and tries to befriend her (my personal theory for this is that he was told to do this as his handicap) while giving no information about himself. While he does grow attached to her by the first main game (even breaking that emotionless facade by mistake) it takes her a while before she starts to trust him. But by chapter 31B the effect is significant. In logic route, Ranmaru saying his name is all it takes to bring her back to reality when she was about to go full murder mode. That is huge. Keiji is essentially Sara’s new Joe, further signified by later during the banquet when in a parallel to chapter 2, she imagines Keiji encouraging her to get through the game. I see a lot of people jeering that you can’t turn down signing the contract, but sorry ladies, Keiji is important to Sara. He has become to her another anchor.

And speaking of choices (smooth transitions? What are those?) I wanna talk about the lack of choice to go with Ranmaru in logic route. I will say I am dissapointed we don’t have an ending where we go with Ranmaru. It’d be so rad. But I do think the fact we don’t have that option says a lot about Sara’s character. When the Yabusame dies, her thoughts are “I didn’t want this.” And she then decides to make the resolve to become a better person. That means a lot. Sara has been changed by her experiences and her friends. She is not the same person from the simulations and it is not too late for her to change herself. And I just. (Chefs kiss) Mama Mia that’s a spicy character development, and I am now firmly logic route supremacy.

I also want to talk about her narrative and the weight of responsibility. After the Russian Roulette game, Kai tells her not to push herself, a sentiment that gets lost when she realizes he’s her stalker. The adults in the game all put her on a leadership pedestal when it shouldn’t be her responsibility. I used to think the biggest culprit of this was Keiji, but looking back and replaying the game, I think the biggest, albeit probably not malicious factor, was Qtaro. I made a post awhile back about how Keiji began to realize pretty early on that making Sara the leader was a mistake, and tried to calm her down. The thing is, by that point it was too late. By that point, she put the priority of the group over her best friend. Abandoning that responsibility would triple her guilt. Again, logic route seems to have her realization she isn’t fit to be leader, and Qtaros acknowledgement she doesn’t have to be one so, logic route supremacy.

This wasn’t really a full analysis but I hope I helped with your brain rot

#your turn to die #kimi ga shine #sara chidouin #reko yabusame #nao egokoro #keiji shinogi #ask #yttd

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falsegoodnight · 4 years ago

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a new header??? it matches better <3 these are the fics I read or reread and enjoyed this month! like last time, i’m separating it into different sections: main list, wips, and non-1d. rereads will be included in the main list and marked with a star (*).

*note: this list encompasses the fics i’ve read from the 1st to the 28th only

—

main list ~

✰ Don’t Wait Up by reliablyimperfect | NR | 1k

Without Harry’s warmth next to him, he felt the chill of the air creep over his skin. He tugged the blanket down from where Harry kept one draped over the back of the couch for him, grateful. With the blanket, he instantly felt warmer, but it backfired when his eyes began to droop again. Trying to keep his eyes open was impossible, and he was consciously aware of how long his blinks were becoming. They stay closed longer and longer until, eventually, they didn’t open again.

so soft and sweet and lovely! made my heart feel so warm <3 will return to this for some quick comfort in the future!

✰ my ugly mouth kept running by @hadestyles | E | 4k

Sometimes second chances are more important than the first.

rori’s lush writing + abo + exes to lovers = absolute perfection. my fic cameo gives it a bonus too :’) definitely one of my rori favs

✰ i’ve loved you three summers now honey, i want them all by @softloubabie | M | 4k

The restaurant was small and bright, soft colors filled the walls and tables and fairy lights hung from everywhere. From what Harry had read, the food wasn’t overly expensive but it was still comparable to what you would get at one of the more expensive places. If Harry could he would take Louis to the biggest most expensive and extravagant restaurants to do what he planned to tonight, but this would do.

After being led to their table Harry nervously tapped his jacket pocket, sighing in relief when he felt the small box still there. Tonight was the night. He couldn’t wait till it was time to surprise Louis with all the gifts he got for him. Then finally the big surprise.

so cute and sweet! their kids were so adorable and the proposal so lovely!! they love each other so much <3

✰ love me in between the future and the past by navigator & quitter | E | 11k

Harry's scared of history repeating itself.

this honestly hurt to read but in such a raw and emotional way?? was mad at harry and then sad for him :( this writer duo’s fics never fail to amaze me!

✰ sunshine on my mind by @raspberryoatss | E | 13k

Louis visits Harry in Portland

this was so sweet and lovely! the perfect addition to this wonderful universe! pip’s characterizations and fluff never fails to make my heart feel warm <3

✰ rapture in the dark by @stylinsonsupporter | T | 13k

Harry Styles is a breakout musician who has shed his boyband label in favor of embracing his inner brooding rockstar. His PR team think that his rebrand is the perfect time for Harry to come out of the closet and have devised the perfect plan for doing so. Enter Louis Tomlinson, up and coming (and very openly homosexual) model whose public image as America's Sweetheart is the perfect foil for Harry's new edge. From a PR standpoint, it's a dream come true - a power couple that can slowly coax the public into accepting Harry's altered image. The only problem? They hate each other.

always love a good fake dating au and this is no exception! and model louis >> really enjoyed this!

✰ Maybe, Baby* by thoughtsickles | M | 16k | mpreg

It all feels too easy, too good to be true. It all feels like a scene from Louis' daydreams, the kind of life he'd always imagined he'd have when he was younger and bored at his momma's work, sneaking around the hallways of the maternity ward until the nurses let him in to hold the babies. He'd felt so important being allowed to touch them. He'd told them stories of the lives they were going to have, houses with nice wallpaper that wasn't peeling, yards filled with sunshine and flowers and grass that never went yellow. A hammock to nap in, cuddled up with his husband.

You can't stay here, he tells himself, but Baby doesn't want to listen.

have reread this one quite a bit of times now and it still makes me so happy <3 this Louis and Harry deserve the world <333

✰ Let Me Inside by reliablyimperfect | E | 18k

Louis is Harry’s boss, but Harry is the boss of Louis.

loved this one! really enjoyed the balance between h&l and how they maintained their dynamic in subtle ways outside of the bedroom while also keeping it separate. very much enjoyed the jealousy as well <3

✰ a scintilla of predilection by @dehydratedpoolfics | T | 20k

There, in the far back of the room, next to the only available seat left, is none other than Harry Styles. Harry, who grew up next door to him, who knew all his secrets as a child and played FIFA with him on Saturday mornings after he would spend the night Friday evenings every week, whose curly hair would tickle his nose as they held each other during bitter cold nights that made his room glow a haunting blue.

love ex-childhood friends with misunderstandings!! louis was so cute and i loved his poetry <3 harry too was so stupid but so smitten and lovely :’) really enjoyed this!

✰ Keeping The Flame Alive by @crazyupsetter | E | 20k

Recording with One Direction never felt like this. There’s a couple reasons for that, Harry thinks. One is that they did most of their recording on the road, rushed and in busses and hotel rooms, never in one place long enough to really get an argument going. The other, larger and more important one, is that back then he had the sweetest, meanest little omega around to distract him from all of that frustration.

The first time around, when he’d been recording his debut solo album, it hit him pretty hard. He likes to think he’s better adjusted to it now, but frustration is warring under his skin nonetheless. He doesn’t want to be told what to do most of the time, and he especially doesn’t want to be told what to do when it comes to his music.

What he does want right now is that sweet, mean little omega right in front of him with his mouth on Harry’s cock. Unfortunately, the best he’s got is his own hand and a shared toilet. So. That’s really not going to work.

✰ like it’s a game* by @soldouthaz | E | 32k

There is little Harry hates more than truth or dare.

And Louis.

queen of enemies to lovers! it’s been a while since i’ve reread this but too absolutely no surprise, it’s just as amazing as always <3 sarah never misses!

✰ Too Young To Know by @2tiedships2 | M | 35k

Harry doesn’t present as an alpha… until he does.

really enjoyed this as per usual! exes to lovers is my jam and the added angst of Louis dating someone else at the beginning... love <3

✰ Some Things Take Root* by navigator & quitter | E | 50k

Louis' ex doesn't get jealous of anyone besides Harry. Harry helps Louis use that to his advantage.

stumbled upon this randomly and decided to reread on a whim... ended up staying up to read it in one sitting! so good!

✰ Safe and Sound (You’ll Always Be) by @all-these-larrythings | E | 58k

When a failed case and a guilty conscience leaves Harry more than a little lost, his boss presents him with a new, less taxing assignment to help him cope. An escape from all the madness is just what Harry needs to get his life back on track. It's just too bad his new client has a grin like the devil, a pair of electric eyes that Harry simply can't get over, and no intention whatsoever of letting him catch a break.

i don’t know how i’ve never read this before??? it was absolutely amazing though! perfect blend of humor and fluff and tension and angst <3

✰ Mind Over Matter (You Under Me) by @youreyesonlarry | E | 74k

It’s dark outside when Harry finishes practice for the day.

the slow burn in this fic killed me - which is to say, it was perfect! loved how they progressed from working together to being friends to something more and how much they genuinely cared for each other! the hockey was so fun too!

✰ Call Out My Name by frenchkiss | E | 102k

Apparently, it's bad PR to fall in love with the omega you hired to help you through your rut.

Harry Styles begs to differ.

ellen truly knocked it out of the park with this one!! had everything i could ever want: abo, famous/non-famous, fluff, humor, angst, drama, and more! i loved it from beginning to end!

wips ~

✰ ‘cause all our tomorrows lead the way by @loubellies | E | 64k | 7/11

So maybe Louis’ in over his head.

He had signed up for the Bachelor on a whim after his second bottle of wine and well, here he is. He’s just been announced as the twenty-sixth Bachelor and his ass is sweating. Like, literally sweating. He’s positive that if he was to turn around, the entirety of Bachelor Nation would get a nice peek of his ass sweat.

am thoroughly enjoying each chapter!! it’s been a wild ride so far and although things are currently calm, i am still on edge!! but i trust mar with my life <3

✰ Truth Behind Golden Eyes by @lwtisloved | E | 83k | 8/16

Louis is a royal servant born with magic in a kingdom where his sole existence is outlawed with a war he has no idea he has a part in upon him. Harry is the prince on whom the burden of mending a broken kingdom falls upon and he might be willing to risk it all for a simple servant if only he admitted it to himself.

caught up last night! still really enjoying every chapter and can’t wait to see what happens next!! things are *happening* with h&l and answers are being given!! (love the jealousy too!)

non-1d ~

✰ Keep Me Close (I Need Your Faith) by @princelouisau | E | 23k

Somewhere along the way he had fallen in love and in doing so, had broken the one rule he knew he couldn’t come back from. As quickly as he realised, he decided that he must never dare speak it. He resigned himself to loving Draco in silence.

first foray into reading drarry... and, to no one’s surprise, i loved it! beautiful writing as always and beautiful atmosphere! it’s really not a shock that i fell for these characters and their story when danielle is behind it <3 it had me entranced from beginning to end!!

finally, i myself actually posted a fic this month:

my fics ~

✰ yesterday came suddenly by me | E | 49k | mpreg

Harry the deadliest member of the NYC assassins’ guild, is forced to face a seemingly impossible task in hopes of finally leaving the underground behind for good, but when ghosts from the past come back to haunt him, escaping the darkness becomes that much harder.

If you read any of these beautiful works of art, remember to leave kudos and comment to show your appreciation!

*if i made any errors, please let me know :)

enjoy!

#my fic recs #fic recs #28th appreciation #march recs #2021 recs #march 2021 recs #scheduled

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inkandpen22 · 4 years ago

Text

It’s Pretty

Pairing: Sirius Black x Female!Reader

Warnings: death, fighting, swearing, fluff

Word Count: 1k

Summary: Y/N is newly pregnant and Sirius is over the moon. Then, the unexpected happens.

A/N: I usually post imagines on Mondays, but I wrote this last night and couldn’t wait!

Masterlist

Lounging on the couch with my head in Sirius’s lap, we go over baby names. I’m only less than a handful of months along, so we’re keeping the news a secret until we’re certain it’s safe. The only people who know are Remus and Harry. We told Remus because he’s our oldest friend and Sirius accidentally exploded when Remus came over the other day. The man-made it through from the door and Sirius just let it out. It came as quite a shock to me too and I’m the pregnant one. Harry was planned. We wrote to him asking to be the godfather, it only seems fair. Sirius pushed for Remus for a while, but with his responsibilities to the Order, I felt Harry was the best choice.

Ever since we found out, it’s all Sirius can talk about. When everyone comes over for meetings he has to bite his tongue. I’m afraid the meetings' firewhiskey sessions will perhaps be my worst enemy one day. Sirius loves to blab. Recently, he’s been talking about names all hours of the day and sometimes randomly in the middle of the night. No seriously- no pun intended- he’ll wake me up in the middle of the night when he’s thought of “the most perfect name for the little guy.” We don’t even know if it’s a boy yet.

“Alexi,” I announce for a boy.

Sirius cowers, his face scrunched like a bulldog. “Alexi? What are we Russian?”

“It’s pretty!” I defend.

“I won’t let my son have a pretty name,” he mocks. “It’ll be handsome and strong!”

I roll my eyes. “And Sirius isn’t pretty?”

“It’s majestic,” he corrects.

I hum, “oh! What about Torryn?”

He taps his finger against his chin, pondering it over. “Not too shabby. Better than Alexi...” He remarks slyly. “We always do-”

“We’re not naming it James!” I repeat, yet again. “Let Harry have that one.”

“Fine...” he grumbles, all pouty. “What if it��s a girl?”

“Sheridan,” I answer.

“So now we’re Irish?!” He sighs deeply, resting his head back dramatically on the couch.

“Do you have any bright ideas?!” I challenge playfully.

“Cressida,” he states calmly.

“Cressida...” I repeat, thinking it over.

“You like it?” Sirius smiles, petting my hair gently as he looks down at me.

“Yes actually,” I admit. “It’s pretty!”

“Don’t sound so surprised,” he laughs, leaning in for a kiss.

The sound of the front door causes Sirius and I to leap up from our position. My heart pounds in my chest. We weren’t expecting visitors today. The sound of footsteps, a series of them, brings me panic. Sirius immediately blocks me from the archway, protecting me. His wand is raised in front of him in one hand and the other grips my hand behind him. Then, Remus and Tonks turn the corner panting.

“Quick! It’s Harry and the other kids!”

“What?!” Sirius and I say in unison.

“They’re... They’re at the ministry!” Remus pants. “The prophecy!”

Sirius curses under his breath and starts down the hall the way they came with our friends. I follow the trio without a second thought.

“You’re not going!” Sirius shouts just before we reach the door.

“I’m coming Sirius!” I yell at my husband.

“Y/N!” He whips around angrily.

Tonks and Remus move aside, creating a clear path between me and my husband.

“I’m not even showing yet!” I defend.

“You’re pregnant!” Sirius reminds sharply.

Tonks gasps, her hand flying up to her mouth. Remus whispers something to her. Probably along the lines of ‘sorry, I couldn’t tell you.’

“And you’re an idiot,” I fire back, stifling my laughter. “Looks like we both have a gamble!”

Sirius rushes down the hall to me and cups my face in his hands pleadingly. “I can’t lose you.”

“Then you should be able to understand why I can’t let you go without me,” I claim quietly, placing my hands over his. “I can’t wait here doing nothing when I know you’re out there risking your life! It’s not just your life Sirius, it’s both of ours. It’s always you and me.”

He exhales deeply, lowering his head as he struggles with the internal debate going through his mind. “Okay,” he mumbles reluctantly. Rushing, he plants a kiss on my lips and takes my hand.

_____________________________

I sprint to huddle behind a bolder with Ginny beside me. She’s brilliant, I’ll give her that. Granted, I could already tell after hearing her subtle comments at dinner that never failed to make me laugh.

Remus runs into view with Hermione and I take the opportunity to hand over Ginny. “Remus, watch them!”

“Y/N! Where are you going?!” He shouts, leaving the girls hidden to stop me.

“I have to help my husband and godson! I can’t just stand there!” I argue, marching aww.

“No!” He grabs my wrist and yanks me down behind a rock. “Sirius wouldn’t want you to!”

“Since when have I ever listened to him?!” I move to stand.

Remus yanks me back down, much to my annoyance. “You have your child to think about!”

“I am thinking of them!” I hiss at my oldest friend. “I won’t let them grow up without a father!”

His eyes pour into mine, awestruck. It’s highly unlike me to argue with him or anyone who isn’t my husband I suppose. Taking the chance now that he’s a little more compliant, I rise to my feet. Sirius and Harry fight off Lucius on the giant boulder in the center of the room. I run to join them urgently.

“Avada kedavra!”

I halt upon hearing the horrific words echo in the room. My eyes scan the room for the source and I spot Bellatrix towering above the rest of us, a wickedly grin on her face. I follow her eyesight to the center, to my husband. He has an unfamiliar blank stare in his eyes as he peers at Harry. Out of my peripheral vision, Remus runs past me. Before he can reach the pair, Sirius slips away into the archway.

“No!” I scream at the top of my lungs. “No!” I cry.

Kingsley wraps his arms around me, keeping me back. I fight him off, aggressively. “Let go of me!”

“No, no don’t let her win!” He warns in my ear.

I wail as my legs give out on me and I slip to the ground. “No,” I cry toward the ceiling.

“Get her out of here!” Shouts Remus.

I hear Bellatrix’s laugh ringing throughout the room. Something in my snaps and my tears stop altogether. Kingsley reaches to apparate me home, but I snatch my wand off the ground beside me and runoff. I follow Bellatrix out into the crevice she escaped through.

“Y/N!” Everyone calls after me panicked.

“I killed Sirius Black!” The crazy lunatic repeats like a song as she skips through the Ministry. “I killed Sirius Black!”

“You raging bitch!” I yell as I shoot a spell her way and missing.

“Aw cousin-in-law coming to get me?!” She mocks, continuing her celebration.

“Crucio!”

Bellatrix falls to the floor with a yelp. I continue my spell, putting at much focus as I can into her. She flails on the tile in pain, screaming. I wonder if it reminds her of torture in Azkaban. I sure hope it does.

I ease up on the spell, lower my wand to her chest. Catching her breath, she peers at me terrified. As she should be because now I’m the raging bitch. She thinks she’s evil because she was filled with hate. Well, now I’m filled with hate!

Pointing my wand directly at her chest, I smile wickedly at the woman who killed my love. Just two words and everything will be set fair and square.

“Aw, afraid of me now?” I tease with a mocking pout.

“I don’t need a blood traitor feeling sorry for me!” She bites.

I snicker, amused by her pointless insults. Swiftly, I kneel down on the floor beside her, getting in her face. I point my wand at her chest and dig it into the skin intimidatingly. Then, I hit her where I’m certain it will hurt.

“You’ll never be anything more than just another loyal follower,” I remind her smoothly with a smile on my face. “He will never want you. You alone will never be enough for him. You can try everything in your power, but the Dark Lord will never love you.”

She pushes back against my wand. “How dare-”

I slap her hard, causing her face to snap to the side. “Tell me how it feels Bella! Tell me how it feels to be worth nothing in eyes of the person you love! Because I wouldn’t know that feeling! Because unlike you, the man I loved, loved me in return!”

“Go to Hell!” She screams in my face.

“I’ll see you there!” I laugh, leaping to my feet and ready to kill the bitch.

“No Y/N!” I hear Remus shout a distance away.

“What is this?” I hear a sly voice question directly behind me.

I glance over my shoulder to be met with Voldemort. Bellatrix laughs loudly.

“Y/N, it’s been too long,” he smiles wickedly. “You’ve grown up so much!” He pauses for a moment, then his eyes fall to my stomach. “And you’re with child, how wonderful.”

I remain silent, restraining myself from doing something rash. The Dark Lord slithers toward me with a smile. Remus and the others stay back, ready to intervene if necessary, but don’t want to cause anything detrimental.

“You know, it’s not too late to join my ranks,” Voldemort whispers to me as he circles me.

“Never,” I stand my ground, knowing it may cost my life.

“Pity, you have such potential,” he mutters disappointedly, starring into my eyes.

He stays for a moment and I can see the wheels turning in his mind. Reaching up, he brushes the back of his hand against my cheek. Then, he sighs and turns to walk away.

“Aren’t you gonna kill her?!” Bellatrix whines, following after him.

The Dark Lord halts and snaps his attention to her, “are you questioning me?!”

The sound of blasting fire as people arrive through the fireplaces signal Voldemort that he must depart. Voices erupt once they see him for themselves.

Voldemort looks to me. “The honor of being my right hand is always open to you, Y/N,” he purrs before disappearing into a cloud of broken glass.

I fall to my knees, utterly exhausted. Tears well up in my eyes and soon I feel arms around me. I glance to my side and Harry’s head rests on my shoulder. I turn to face him, wrapping my arms around him. His head falls to my lap and he wails. I lean over him, protecting him from the world as I’ve always done. I didn’t just lose a husband, he lost a godfather. The realization hits me hard, we’re each other’s only family now.

_____________________________________

Masterlist

#fanfic #harry potter imagine #harry potter #marauders x reader #sirius black imagine #sirius black x reader #btvs fanfic #hp fanfic #sirius x remus #remus lupin #remus #harry potter fanfic #sirius black #sirius black fanfic #sirius x reader

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kittyprincessofcats · 4 years ago

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She-Ra S5 E08 - Shot in the Dark

There might be spoilers for the rest of the season in this post!

I absolutely LOVE this episode, and at first, I couldn’t really put my finger on why I liked it that much. And then Noelle tweeted this:

And yeah, that’s what it boils down to. This is the first *happy* Catra episode since... basically since “Once Upon a Time in the Waste” - and back then, the happiness didn’t last long.

(I also just think that story of AJ being so worried about Catra and Noelle reassuring her with every script is so adorable. I love to see how much they all care about these characters.)

Now let’s get into the episode!

- “Why does space hate me so much?” Yeah Glimmer, as I’ve said before, your powers don’t work in space because otherwise things would be way too easy and this show would be over way too quickly.

- “So, your plan is to, what? Ram through an armada of ships?” “No! ...Maybe!” 😂 I love Adora.

- The way Catra’s hands are shaking when she tells Adora they’re going to get caught... oh, baby 😢. And how Adora suddenly looks so worried... gosh, these two.

- Catra and Adora playfully arguing over whether or not Catra ‘defeated’ them in the past is so cute. I love this kind of ‘former enemies’ bickering and it’s why I was so glad they didn’t wait until the very end of the show to redeem Catra.

Bow: “Adora, Catra’s right.”

[Everyone’s eyes go wide.]

Bow: ... “That felt weird to say.”

😂 Brilliant. Absolutely brilliant. Bring on all the ‘former enemies’ bickering, please!

- So, is this just because Wrong Hordak’s “brains were scrambled”, as Bow put it, or do all the clones randomly blurt out that Horde Prime has a weakness whenever they hear someone ask about it? I’m going to assume it’s the former. Also, the way he keeps blurting out more and then denying that Krytis exists is super funny.

- I like how they set Krytis up before with Catra having visions of it back in Taking Control - still pretty convenient that just hearing the name lets her make the connection, but I’ll take it. (Is it meant to be some lingering effect of being connected to the hivemind that she’s having visions of it again now, or is it just her remembering what she saw before?)

- I love the detail that Darla’s information on Krytis is locked and they need administrator clearance to access it. Shows again that the First Ones aren’t that different from Horde Prime - they were also ashamed of their failure to conquer Krytis and tried to hide the information on it.

- “In- In- In- Incorrect. It is located nowhere, because it does not exist, because Lord Prime destroyed it.” I honestly think this line should be a meme. When you want to hide something from someone (but you know it does exist), just quote that exact line (kind of like “There is no war in Ba Sing Se”). I once said it to my sisters when they asked about certain fanfics I wrote as a teenager. (“Nope, they are located nowhere, because they do not exist, because Lord Prime destroyed them.”)

- Changes in the opening: Micah, Spinnerella, Scorpia and Mermista are now standing mind-controlled around the Heart of Etheria in the villains’ shot. They’re also all missing from the final heroes’ card. In that final shot, Perfuma and Sea-Hawk both look sad now, and Netossa looks angry.

- Catra touching her neck when she sees the spire on Krytis... 😢. I’m here for the angst, but I also just need Catra to get lots of love and comfort after everything she’s been through.

- Can we talk about how absolutely ADORABLE her space suit is, though? Bow is absolutely right to coo over those ears. And when she tries to take it off with her foot? And Adora laughs about it? And Catra smiles when she sees her laugh? ❤️❤️❤️

- Wrong Hordak still denying that Krytis exists while currently being on Krytis is absolutely hilarious to me. It reminds me of flat-earthers or anti-vaxxers, or people who try to deny Covid exists (while others are currently dying from Covid) - not that any of those are funny, of course. I just mean that wrong Hordak nicely demonstrates how ridiculous they can sound.

- Catra calling out the Best Friend Squad on how dumb their plan is and then reacting with “Honestly, what did I expect?” is absolutely iconic. They really were missing her as the team’s braincell all along.

- Bow and Glimmer teasing Catra about her “first mission”, Catra grumbling that she’s going to kill Adora’s friends, Adora responding with a really calm “Please don’t” - everything about this is perfect. 🤣

- Also, small detail, but I love how Catra has a hard time walking in her spacesuit because she’s not used to wearing shoes.

- The remaining rebels looking around the destroyed camp is really sad. Frosta immediately trapping Castaspella in ice and checking her neck is great, though. That’s what they should have been doing all along. Why didn’t they also check Shadow Weaver’s neck, though? I know she’s intimidating and all, but there was no way of knowing if she’s chipped.

- “How did the rebellion lose so many of our finest members and yet we’re still stuck with you?” Castaspella’s asking the real questions! I like how literally no one in the rebellion likes Shadow Weaver. (Though honestly, I’m also glad she’s not chipped. Imagine how hard fighting a chipped Shadow Weaver would have been.)

- “But if you try anything, I won’t hesitate to strike you down.” Castaspella said ‘I won’t hesitate, b*tch!’

- Every single part of Wrong Hordak’s existential crisis (and Entrapta’s handling of it) is absolutely hilarious. I’m not going to quote all of it here, but pretty much every line of it is comedy gold. My favourite moment is probably “It seems Wrong Hordak has begun to question the meaning of life” (and everyone’s annoyed expressions at his crying) 😂😂. (On a more serious note, though: As much as it’s played for laughs, Wrong Hordak turning his entire worldview around in such a short amount of time is also pretty epic.)

- Catra just cutting through that door - damn, she’s strong! And I love Adora’s blush! (Yeah, the door was probably just an illusion, but my point still stands. She’s at least strong enough that it doesn’t seem completely weird that she'd be able to just cut through a door like that.)

- “You have an arrow that turns into a magnifying glass? I can’t believe we were losing to you guys.” 🤣🤣 Catra realizing the people she was fighting are actually idiots will never not be funny.

- It goes hand in hand with Bow realizing Catra is actually a cute kitty with an adorable sneeze. Good stuff. And the way her tail gets fluffy when she insists she’s not cute? D’awww. (Bow saying “The angrier you get, the cuter you are” reminded me of that scene in Steven Universe where Peridot loses her limb-enhances at the beginning of her redemption arc and Steven calls her cute and “an angry little slice of pie”.)

- Castaspella’s cape getting stuck in tree branches and the like is pretty funny, ngl. This is why Edna Mode said “No capes”.

- Shadow Weaver saying that her gifts are “far subtler” than mind-control is very fitting. Her thing is manipulation, after all. She doesn’t need to control people’s minds when she can just manipulate them and raise them in a way that’ll make them do what she wants. It’s scarier than mind-control in a way because it’s far more realistic. Mind-control doesn’t exist in real life, but manipulative parents (or just manipulative people) who will mess someone up emotionally? Very realistic.

- I like that you can tell that something’s off about Entrapta’s voice this time if you pay attention to it.

- “Seriously? How have you guys stayed alive this long?” Yup, the people you were fighting are idiots and you’re the braincell of the team now, Catra.

- I love the creepy music when Entrapta tells them it’s the first time they’ve talked since the last floor.

- Also, I love how Catra’s first instinct is to just launch herself at Melog, even though you could tell she was terrified just a moment earlier.

- I really like the moment where Glimmer realizes there’s magic on Krytis, especially since she doesn’t have her other powers right now.

- Melog bonds with Catra because they have the same sneeze ❤️❤️

- “Are you... are you petting the thing that’s been trying to kill us?” I love this whole moment 😹. I also love how Adora is so protective of Catra and immediately yells “Get away from her!” when Melog seems to get angry.

Catra: “I’m sorry. I got angry. It’s something I’m working on.”

Adora [with sparkling eyes]: “Aww, you are?”

Catra: “Yes! Now can you please...” [deep breath] “Yes. I am.”

I love everything about this. Catra genuinely working on her anger issues, Adora being so touched about it (remember back in Taking Control where she wished that Catra would ‘at least try’?), Catra having to hold back her anger because she realized Melog responds to emotions - perfect. ❤️😂👍

- Catra is so sweet when she calms Melog down. And the moment where they form their bond is really nice.

- So, can Catra understand Melog because of their bond, or because they’re both cats? I’m assuming it’s because of their bond?

- Melog’s backstory is really sad. But Adora offering to take them to Etheria is a really sweet scene.

- I like the parallel between the Best Friend Squad realizing that magic is Horde Prime’s weakness (and that the only planet he ever failed to conquer had wild magic) and Shadow Weaver telling Castaspella that the First Ones weakened Etheria’s magic and they have to set it free.

- “Stop me if I try to take the power for myself.” I’m not sure how I feel about that line. I like how SPOP has very much written Shadow Weaver as ambiguous so far. She’s not a good or nice person by any means, but is she at least on the side of the good guys and really trying to help now or is she still only after her own selfish goals? I very much did not want Shadow Weaver to get any sort of redemption or forgiveness, and I’ve always interpreted her as still being power-hungry. So, I have mixed feelings about this line. I like that it canonically acknowledges that Shadow Weaver is still tempted by power and might actually try to take the magic for herself, but asking Castaspella to stop her if she tries makes her look more selfless and like she’s taking precautions against it. (But then again, could Castaspella even stop her if she tried? I’m pretty sure Shadow Weaver is the stronger one of the two. So, you could still read this as Shadow Weaver being a master manipulator and only saying this so Castaspella will feel more inclined to trust her and go along with her plan - while knowing full-well that she could easily defeat Castaspella if it ever actually came down to it.)

Glimmer: “So, just to make sure I get it - We’re going to go running through a Horde blockade while relying on the magic of a creature we just met?”

Catra: “That about sums it up, yes.”

You know what this means - Catra’s a part of the Squad now!

- “Punch it, Darla!” I still love that the ship’s name is Darla. Also, all of their expressions when they fly through the blockade should be a “draw the squad” meme.

- Catra holding Adora’s hand and getting embarassed about it ❤️❤️ (while Adora is dumb and doesn’t even notice).

- I did not expect us to get a Glitra cheek kiss this season, but I’m not complaining! Also, Catra complaining while Glimmer and Bow are hugging her is such a cat thing; I love it.

- “We made it. We’re home.” Correct me if I’m wrong, but I think this is actually the first episode this season that ends on a happy / hopeful note and not on some kind of cliffhanger. And I really like that. This is where the “space arc” of season 5 offically comes to and end and I’m glad it has its own little happy ending. (And as much as I like the final episodes of the season, the space arc is still probably my favourite half of it.)

I love this episode, mainly because of what it means for Catra. She’s finally happy, she saved the day, she’s bonding with Bow and Glimmer and constantly flirting with Adora, and she has an amazing therapy cat now! I loved all the bickering between her and the others and how she’s starting to open up to them. Also, Wrong Hordak was absolutely hilarious in this episode and I commend Entrapta for having the patience to deal with his existential crisis. This was a really nice way to wrap the space arc up and bring the Squad back to Etheria.

[Previous episode] [Next episode]

#spop #spop s5 #spop s5 spoilers #Shot in the Dark #Catradora #Catra #Melog #Adora #Glimmer #Bow #Entrapta #Wrong Hordak #Noelle Stevenson #AJ Michalka #She-Ra and the princesses of power #Castaspella #Shadow Weaver #long post

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iamanartichoke · 4 years ago

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I started typing this in the tags of this post, and it got too long, and then I was going to just reblog the post with this as an addition but that got too long too, and I've been meaning to make a post addressing free will vs. predestination since the premiere anyway, so - here we go. Spoilers, obviously.

Cut for length and spoilers. Please blacklist #loki tv series spoilers, #loki series spoilers, and #loki spoilers.

This is kinda rough and I'm not sure it actually makes any sense but I'm posting it anyway.

I realize that the post is a joke, obviously (and it is hilarious) but I started thinking about the implications and couldn't stop because it's honestly a goldmine of existential reflection and an inevitable crisis or three.

Let's look at a scenario.

Say you're late to work for reasons totally beyond your control: your neighbor stopped you to ask a question on your way out the door; you swung through the drive-thru for a quick coffee but the person in front of you is ordering a full continental breakfast ffs (this happened to me this morning); there was an explosion and then the Winter Soldier randomly dropped from the sky and landed on the hood of your car. Whatever. Shit happens.

So you're late, but on this particular day, your lateness somehow has consequences that lead to and create a nexus event and the next thing you know, you're being arrested, tried, convicted of time crimes and ultimately (a version of you is) erased from existence.

And this is if it's not even your fault you're late.

Now say that you're late and it is your fault. You took a new route on a whim and drove a little more slowly because you passed a particularly pretty meadow; you hit the brakes at a yellow light instead of speeding through bc you wanted the quick chance to check your email; you sat in your car for a few extra minutes in the parking lot, because maybe your job sucks and you really needed those extra minutes today to psyche yourself up into getting out of the car and going inside and clocking in.

These little choices are you exercising your free will. Because to me, free will is all or nothing - it doesn't just apply to the big decisions.

On the other hand, predestination means that regardless of the choices you make or if it's a big decision or not, everything you do is ultimately going to lead you to a set point or position or place (your destiny).

And I can kind of look at it like a GPS - that is, there are a number of "insignificant" choices you could make and they will still lead you to where you're predestined to go. Like how a GPS will reconfigure your route if you miss your exit on the highway. It doesn't matter if you took Route A or Route B, you're still going to end up at your destination.

But say sometimes the route does matter. Say that there are certain scenarios in which there's only one road (for example, 14 million losses vs 1 win) and you can only get on it by following a specific series of events and what determines the ultimate outcome is whether or not you're late to work that day.

If you decide to wait those extra five minutes in the parking lot, that means that you weren't in your cubicle at 9:03 when Stanley from Accounting wandered by with his giant stack of papers, and when Mary Sue said hello to him, he got distracted and tried to wave and ended up dropping those papers. Had you been at your cubicle, you'd have swooped down to help him but since you weren't there, Stanley is crouched on the floor alone and doesn't notice Joe coming at him with a paper trolley so when he stands up, he and Joe collide and Stanley loses his balance and goes face-first toward the trolley and breaks his nose when he hits the metal handle on his way down.

Now Stanley has to go to the hospital to get his nose set because you wanted to sit in your car and spend five extra minutes hating your life that morning.

If the sacred timeline says that Stanley is supposed to be in that ER at that specific time on that specific day, and no other set of circumstances would get him there, because this will ultimately take Stanley down the road to whatever greater journey he's supposed to go on, then it has to happen. But say you exercise your free will and decide not to wait those five minutes, because the free will applies to every choice you make, even the tiny, insignificant ones. You chose to put on your big person pants and took a deep breath and just head inside - and because you chose to do that and because you were at your cubicle to help Stanley with his papers, Stanley never ends up in the ER and the timeline that's supposed to happen is suddenly at risk and the TVA has to get involved (I assume).

So having free will introduces way, way too many variables into a fixed timeline to ever keep track, because you're taking these tiny, seemingly insignificant choices that people are making every minute of every day, and you're multiplying them by trillions of sentient beings in the universe, and you're saying the fate of the timeline and reality itself depends on all of these beings either always making the choice they're supposed to make or constantly sending the TVA out whenever they don't.

It's fair to conclude, then, that both free will and a fixed, single timeline can't exist at the same time. Either you adhere to the fixed timeline and everyone does exactly what they're supposed to do every second of every minute of existence, or you have free will and autonomy over all of your decisions, no matter how big or small, and those decisions can result in a number of outcomes, ultimately leading you to one of several possible destinations.

Case in point: Tony didn't have to snap his fingers in Endgame. He chose to. Had he not, Thanos would have won. It doesn't matter if there was one way to victory or 14 million ways to failure; the timeline could ultimately only go one of two ways and the choice Tony willingly made determined that Thanos lost. It wasn't predetermined because if Tony had not chosen to snap his fingers, the timeline would have gone the other way.

My personal belief - and this isn't necessarily for the MCU, but in general - is that we do possess free will and the future is ever shifting and changing because nothing is written in stone. It holds up against most, if not all, of the world's belief systems. For example, if you believe that people have guardian angels, the rule is generally that your guardian angels can help you but you have to ask them; they can't decide to intervene without your permission because to do so would infringe upon your free will.

Similarly, you can go on etsy and pay $5 for a funsies psychic reading or pay a lot more money for an in-depth, specific tarot reading and both will tell you that the outcomes may change depending on the paths you take, and that their ultimate advice is for you to keep your focus on your goals and your own self so that you can be subconsciously manifesting the best possible future for yourself. (Not that I know this from experience. It was one time. It was a few times. My point stands, and also stop judging me.)

To get back to the MCU, though - if you determine that both a single, fixed timeline and free will can't simultaneously exist, and your ultimate purpose is upholding said timeline and not letting anyone fuck it up, lest it break off into lots of different branches, then it poses a pretty serious moral and/or ethical question of - who decides what choices we make and what paths we're destined for? The time lizards? Who gave them that authority? Did anyone, or did they just manifest themselves into existence one day, create the universe, and then decide all of the rules (and, if so, where does that leave the norns and the gods and other super powerful beings who are generally thought to be in charge of things)?

If free will doesn't exist and everyone is acting based on what has been predetermined for them by some higher being (or, in this case, time lizards), it takes away our autonomy, and if everything we do and every single tiny step we take is decided for us, what makes us any different than cogs in a machine just following orders? What separates us from robots?

Speaking of robots, it's interesting to me that the TVA's screening process (if you can call it that) has a failsafe against robots specifically. Any robot that might come through is destroyed immediately and in this case, “not a robot” is defined, more or less, as a sentient being that possesses a soul. What does the TVA have against robots if their ultimate goal is ensuring that the robotic machinations of the time lizards are consistently carried out to protect the sacred timeline?

A soul makes you human; the energy of the soul is what you, at the core, are. It can be assumed that having a soul also means that you have some sort of moral and ethical code by which you live your life but, if you don't also have free will, then what is the point of possessing a soul and a moral and ethical code?

Loki is a villain and he's told by Mobius, the TVA, Odin, and pretty much everyone who ever meets him that the only thing he's good for - the only reason he exists - is to cause pain and suffering and death. This has been predetermined for him; this is not his fault and he did not choose it. And every single choice he makes has either already been destined as the choice he was supposed to make, or will be pruned so it won't grow into the wrong timeline. Ultimately Loki can change neither his final destination, nor the purpose and meaning of his existence.

Which leads me to the theory that the several Loki variants that the TVA keeps coming across are the result of Loki consistently resisting against his predetermined path; he's trying to find the timeline where he is able to latch onto and keep his own free will in defiance of the timekeepers but, so far, he hasn't been successful. This could segue into why the current Variant is now going scorched earth and just obliterating the main timeline completely - because if there is no sacred timeline, there's nothing dictating who or what Loki can be, and free will is regained. If there's a multiverse that branches and branches beyond anyone's control, then there must be a branch in there, somewhere, where Loki can exist on his own terms and decide how his own story goes.

This also might be a theory for why Loki is already setting his sights on taking over the TVA (assuming that's not just something he told the variant for reasons). But my original point in delving into all this is to ask: if Loki is predestined to always be a villain whose story plays out exactly the same way because that's what's supposed to happen, then how can anyone ever hold his misdeeds against him? He's literally just existing as the timekeepers decided he would exist and everyone is blaming him for it.

And this leads me to ask, as well, if one's soul is generally good, and one possesses more good traits than bad, what is the logic in making them exist only for pain and destruction? If it's for a greater good, then it stands to reason Loki is not the only one predestined for misery, and what greater good could come from all that suffering?

Conclusion: the existence of the TVA as an organization means that there is one fixed, sacred timeline but the existence of said timeline is immoral and unethical because it means no one actually has any free will at all in the MCU. The very notion of heroes and villains is pointless because it has nothing to do with your own qualities or morality, it's literally the luck of the draw. In order to have free will, the sacred timeline has to be destroyed, and so my prediction is that the Big Bad of the Loki series is not the TVA and not the time keepers but the actual timeline itself, and the entire fate of the MCU rests on whether or not Loki can ultimately succeed.

Also, don't be late for work.

#well this was a journey #smfh #i hope it at least makes *some* sense #loki series meta #loki tv series spoilers #loki series spoilers #loki spoilers #long post #i should have revised this before posting lmao #i went back and edited some of it but meh #it's pretty nonsensical i think but also i confuse myself really easily so

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carnelianns · 5 years ago

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hi! i really loved your hcs about mc making depreciative jokes, could you please do that for isaac, mozart, vincent and comte please? thank you!

anon was talking about this post if anyone’s interested .. also this is so long (*´ー｀*)

tw: anxiety, depression

Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart

Mozart is very supportive in his own, roundabout way, and also has quite the humour (or lack of it — you’re not really sure) so when you do make one of your infamous jokes, you always have to think whether or not to take his reply seriously.

“Are you alright?” You nod, shooting him some finger guns. “Yeah, I’m totally fine, just need to set myself on fire is all.”

He stares, the silence stretching out for a while, then, “Do you need help with that?”

When your self-depreciation does, however, fall on the slightly more serious side, all he can do is frown at your silence, mind running miles and miles to find something that could get you to show him that smile he’s fallen for once again.

Because, he admits, nothing pains him more than knowing the one he loves, the one he’s decided to lean on, is facing struggles he can barely wrap his head around.

“Can you.. hold my hand?” Meek and tiny is your voice as it breaks the silence of his room, Mozart preparing a teasing remark before he turns his head, the sight of your weary eyes and forlorn expression bringing his mouth to a close.

Wordlessly, he moves from his desk towards your snug form on his bed, taking it upon himself to hold your hand in his larger ones, gently shifting your head to rest comfortably in his lap as he soothingly rubs slow, soothing circles on the skin of your hand — just the way you like it.

When he hears your soft sigh of bliss, he allows his motions to continue in silence for a few more moments, before voicing out with furrowed brows, “Why did you suddenly ask for my hand?”

Mozart feels you tense up briefly, though he makes no move to stop his calming ministrations. Said ministrations only come to a pause when you reply.

“It might sound silly but… I felt like if I didn’t feel your warmth, you’d leave. Slip away, like you do so frequently in my thoughts.”

“I’ve never met someone as foolish as you in my whole life,” he mutters lowly. You’re a second away from frowning when he brings his soft fingers to your face, tilting your head to meet his gaze.

There was a certain look of pain in those violet eyes of his, the frown you deemed unfit on his face communicating each and every thought filtering through his brain. Vulnerability was never something Mozart paraded around, yet that exact quality seems to be the only thing he ought to show to you at this moment.

“Why would I ever leave the only person I wish happiness upon every waking second?” His cheeks only redden as he continues, not once leaving your gaze, “I would never leave you. Get that fact into your terribly tiny brain.”

Despite his aversion to, well, affection, Mozart had, in one way or the other, made his words clear throughout the whole day, be it the way he pressed his leg against yours at the dining table, or how often your shoulders touched whilst walking around together.

Actions do speak louder than words, after all.

Vincent van Gogh

The little ray of sunshine is unaware that your gloomy words are mere jests (most of the time), and he still is at times, even after you explained. He has a slight frown on his face whenever you make these jokes, only causing you to regret even opening your mouth.

“How are you feeling today, schatje?” “Oh, I’m not.” You answer listlessly, only straightening up when you see his lips curl downwards. “I mean, I’m not feeling.. Bad. Yes. Haha.” Nice save.

In all honesty, he doesn’t quite understand your self-deprecation, or, well, you. And it eats him alive. The only thing he wishes for is your happiness, but how can he do that when he can barely understand your sadness?

He often partakes in conversations with you regarding your views, always ending up reassuring you in any and every way that he cares, that he loves you.

“You’re going to hate yourself in the morning if you don’t fall asleep right now, you know?” His sleepy murmur against your forehead only brings you to scoff slightly, snuggling in closer to his chest.

“Jokes on you, Vincent, I’m going to hate myself no matter what.”

Your tone is joking, though it does nothing to stop him from tensing up, the better part of his brain urging him to wake up. Furrowing his brows, Vincent manages to calm himself down, slightly glad that you’re unable to see his worried countenance.

“Do you mind telling me why?”

He finds himself listening intently to your words, only pulling you closer to his chest as you explain. It’s heartwarming, really, how someone loves you this much, to listen to the ramblings you’ve deemed “pointless” and feelings you thought “unnecessary”.

“Well.. you know...” he starts, gently pushing your chin up to meet his intense gaze, one you often see when he’s immensely focused on one of his paintings. “I love you. I always will, and I won’t stop, even until you figure out how to love yourself.”

It should be illegal, for someone to say such honeyed words in that gentle tone of his. For someone to say such words, and mean every single one.

You’re helpless as you burry your sniffling form into the chest of the man you love, Vincent only humming softly as he rakes his soft fingers through your hair, urging you to sleep, to bathe in his warmth.

Isaac Newton

Whenever you let out one of your self-deprecating jokes, Isaac always manages to furrow his brows, process it for a few seconds, then proceeds to scoff, scolding you lightly.

“Why is it so easy for you to talk badly about yourself, but so hard for you to stop?” He asks one day, sending you a look. You roll your eyes, “An object in motion stays in motion, genius.”

“... I can’t believe you used my words against me like that.” His lips were permanently twisted into a moue that whole day.

Isaac is quite used to both receiving and giving vitriolic remarks, though he can only remain silent when those remarks are from you, directed to yourself. He can shoulder any amount of criticism, any amount of malice, but when it comes to you — it’s a whole different story.

He’d rather you direct those “jokes” to him than yourself, in all honesty, if it meant taking the burden off your shoulder (which he knows it won’t).

"You’re looking awfully thoughtful today.” His statement reverberates through the empty living room, slowly making his way towards you and the faraway look clear in your eyes.

“Thinking about sleeping but forever...” You murmur absentmindedly, unable to notice the frown marring his features as he sits himself to your left in your zoned out state. “Do you think it would be nice?”

Hesitance broods over his features as he struggles to form an answer, his mouth falling closed and open in a seemingly endless cycle. A frustrated groan brings you out of your daze, your head snapping towards just in time for Isaac to tackle you into an unexpected hug.

“Of course it wouldn’t be nice, you idiot,” he hisses, his grip on you tightening ever-so slightly, as if to keep you from doing what you had just suggested. “Don’t do that. Don’t even think about it.”

His words float through the room, your eyes widening in surprise at the slight rancour in his tone. Though confused, your arms slowly snake around his chest, obvious that he isn’t letting go anytime soon.

“If you do, then who am I going to be loving?” His gentle words are barely audible, but the room is far too silent for his confession to simply fly away.

And usually, you’d be teasing the probably flushed and reddened man, though today you simply opt to hug him just a little bit tighter, inhaling his sweet scent.

It takes a while for the both of you to move from your position on the cushioned sofa. The fact that your lover also pushed away both Dazai and Arthur’s teasings only caused your heart to warm even more.

Comte de Saint-Germain

There isn’t many things that are able to get a reaction out of the always poised man, but your self-deprecating humour always induces quite an unexplainable expression on his handsome face. A confused smile, a worried look, and a slight frown mixed all together is the closest words can get.

“Quite frankly, ma chérie, your life is falling apart,” he says, bemused at your current kitchen situation — cooking without Sebastian is a difficult feat, you’ve learned.

You only wink humorously at him, some sort of concoction dripping from your fingers. “Your life can’t fall apart if you never had it together.”

Cue The Look™.

He can’t deny that his thoughts drift to you a lot. More specifically, to your thoughts and feelings, if it hadn’t already before. Don’t be surprised if you see the man randomly lurking around near you — just a mere check up, as per usual of the worrisome man.

“Ah, ma chérie.. pray tell me why we’re in this position again? Not that I mind, of course.” Confusion is evident in his ever-smooth voice, slowly rubbing his large hands up and down your back as he rests his head on your shoulder.

Not many times do you burst into his study, wordlessly nestling yourself into his lap — much like a koala, he thinks — and staying in that position for quite some time, but it does happen. He can’t say he’s not used to it.

“... You know how you’re perfect?” You ask, briefly looking into his golden eyes before setting your head down once more into the crook of his neck. “Yeah. I have to keep reminding myself that you won’t be leaving this self-deprecating self of mine.”

He inhales softly for a moment, before you hear that comforting voice of his right beside your ear, gentle and deep, and not going anywhere.

“You know that I will never leave you, mon coeur.” My heart. Your own heart thumps slightly at the rare nickname.

A meek nod is the only reply you can muster. He continues, “And you know that I love you.”

Another nod. Then, finally, he turns your head towards his own with the tip of his fingers, a sweet, slightly pained smile painted on his face. Lithe fingers caress your cheeks, bringing you to lean into his warmth. “And you know, that I will love you until your next life, and the one after that, and every, other—”

You immediately cut him off with a kiss, one which he only smiles mischievously into. Curse the immortal for knowing exactly how to get you all hot and flustered.

Not once did he lie though. And he isn’t planning to, especially when it comes to the one he loves.

#ikemen vampire #ikevamp #ikemen vampire x reader #ikevamp x reader #wolfgang amadeus mozart #mozart #vincent van gogh #isaac newton #comte de saint germain #comte #headcanons

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chaoticallysapphic · 5 years ago

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the great trial part one

summary: This was meant to be the easy part. The part filled with brightness and love. The war was over and you had the love of your life all to yourself. No more Baatar, no more secrecy and no more lies. But with the calm comes the realization as all the adrenaline finally leaves you. Now you know, this is the hard part.

a/n: So remember when I said I wouldn’t post anything until the sequel was done? Well it turns out I need validation to thrive and would love peoples feedback on the series so I’ve decided that I am going to slowly release what I currently have while trying to finally finish what’s left. Thank you to @medeliadracon for beta reading this and @ladyxffandoms for being such a big help! This wouldn’t nearly be as good without the two of you.

This is the sequel to the great divide series.

word count: 4k

That first month in your new apartment is probably the worst. You guys were able to find a small one on the bottom floor of a complex. It had a small side garden with a lemon tree and vines growing up the side of the building and your dad was already talking to about all the flowers you could plant together.

Suyin put you on house arrest as well which caused an uproar with not only Kuvira, who offered to take your year for herself, but also your parents. You would be stuck inside for a year whilst she would have to stick it out for three. Kuvira hated how you were paying for her actions, she didn’t see how wrong it was for you to turn a blind eye for three years. No one knew the pressure she put you under.

Your parents offered to pay the bills. They were comfortable enough with your mom's Lieutenant salary and with your father's popular flower shop. They even bought you guys furniture and upon your request paint to personalize your first home.

Somehow once that front door shuts, leaving you both inside with furniture randomly stacked around in the living for the both of you to organize along with paint cans and boxes of your belongings, the room feels like the air has been sucked out of it. You’ve dreamed of this day for years and it isn’t going at all how you planned.

She doesn’t get what the big deal is, she’s just happy she’s not stuck in a prison cell. That frustrated look on your face is new and with a sharp reply at some snappy comment you made, she realizes she doesn’t like it.

Kuvira gets pissed that the couch is too heavy, the paint isn’t the right shade, and even though she claims she doesn’t care it’s what you’ve dreamt, and dammit you deserve for it to come true. A plate cracks, silverware is dropped, the bookcase is too small for all your childhood books and one of you (Kuvira) already managed to scuff up the floors.

This, the after, is meant to be the easy part. There aren't any more battles or secrets, train rides, or negotiations. It’s the two of you in your first apartment and this day is supposed to be a happy one. This is meant to be a peaceful and happy day with stolen kisses as you lazily unpack. You’re meant to be starting over and it’s not supposed to be so difficult.

The sun has gone down and the lights dimly illuminate your disaster of a living space. Nothing has been accomplished. You grip the roots of your hair as the paint issue is once more brought up “why does it matter? It’s a decent color!”

“Because it’s not what I envisioned!”

“Well, we can’t always get what we want! What, are we going to have your parents return it?” Spirits! She doesn’t get it, your vision of the future was sacred, something you held tight for all those years. It has to be at least slightly like you imagined it, and this isn’t right.

To Kuvira, your behavior is starting to remind her of a spoiled child upset about not getting the last piece of candy.

“You don’t get it! It matters to me, we’re gonna be living here for the next three years. I think we should at least like what we put on the walls!” You storm away, slamming the bedroom shut behind you. There aren’t many places to hide here, all the main living space is combined along with a very small bathroom, one wall is completely windows that show the small garden and by the kitchen is the door to the bedroom.

Kuvira stands frozen in the living room, slightly flinching as the door slams shut. She understands that there will be a rocky adjustment period. She admitted that day in the tent that she needs to work on the way she treats you.

But she didn’t expect it to go south so fast. While you have your version of how today is meant to go, so does she. Kuvira hoped today would go along smoothly, she didn’t care about the furniture or walls, she simply wanted to peacefully start off your new life together on a good note.

You aggressively rub at your eyes as you feel tears of frustration well up before sitting down on the edge of your bed. That’s at least one thing that seems to be working out, all the beds you shared in the past were rather small (besides the one in the Beifong estate) so it was a relief to see them carry in a queen-sized bed for both of you. You lay down over the covers and sighed. Tomorrow will be better, you tell yourself.

You don’t mean to fall asleep, you just planned to lay there and stew in your emotions a bit before getting up and trying to talk it out. So when you awake with a start, your hand immediately goes to search for that familiar body. You choke out a sob as you find the other side empty. Momentarily forgetting where you are, you begin to cry as you wrap your arms around yourself. The words “what did I do?” leave your lips.

You bring a hand to try and stifle the sound as your lungs squeeze out all the air it can. The room feels so small and the darkness of the night so terrifying.

There’s the sound of shuffling from the other side of the door before someone opens it up, Kuvira looks at you, her hair a curly mess from sleep. She squints, still half asleep before hearing you let out a whimper. She walks over, crawling onto the bed until she’s in front of you, her hands come up to move your wrists as you continue to try and muffle the sound. “Hey, hey what’s wrong?”

Your eyes shoot up to hers and you throw yourself at her, wrapping your arms around her neck. “You weren’t here,” you cry. Kuvira’s eyebrows shoot up at your words before wrapping her arms around your waist, pulling you closer to try and offer you some kind of comfort. “I thought…” you sniffle, “I thought we were back on the train.”

Suddenly Kuvira feels anger flame within herself but it’s not directed at you but her because she’s the reason you're crying. “I was just sleeping on the couch, no one else is here.” Baatar isn’t here. You grip her shirt for reassurance, the fear within you stays and it makes your joints ache with anxiety as you remember all those nights alone. “I thought you wanted to be alone.”

This side of you is brand new to her and so heartbreaking. She can feel the pounding of your heart and a part of her is worried it’ll break out of your chest. She’s done this to you, she’s made it so you're sobbing so hard you can barely breathe. As you shake in her arms, she realizes this can’t be avoided tomorrow.

You shake your head, not being able to say anything as you continue to cry. She moves her arms, an act that has you holding her tighter, and moves them to your hips so she can scoot you over so that the both of you can sleep. You seem to understand as your grip loosens just a smidgen as she slowly lays down and, due to your clinging, you follow.

Once on your sides, you wrap yourself around her, needing her to be as close as possible, and tuck your face into her neck. It’s not all that comfortable but it helps slow your heart rate down a bit.

In the morning you seem to not want to talk about your episode, you act as if nothing happened. She always tried to ignore the way you looked after those nights on the train, honestly, she was too busy trying to scrub away the events of the night before to have noticed how truly upset you looked.

But now in the light of day as your unpacking more dishes she notices the bags under your eyes and the unusual quiet in your demeanor. Your movements are stiff as you place the baking dishes into a bottom cabinet.

It’s like you're a shell of yourself, like last night that bright, loving person was poured out of you along with your tears. It terrifies her to see how quickly it can all shift.

“Y/n?” You look up, quirking a brow. “Can we talk about last night?”

You tense up a bit, brushing your hands over your sweatpants. “What about it?”

“About…” Kuvira furrows her brows in confusion, “Y/n I thought you were hurt when I woke up.” You bite your lip, fiddling with the ties of your pants. You don't talk about this, never in the past three years have you talked about things like this with her. It always upset her when you tried to talk about how her actions hurt you.

“Well I wasn't, just startled is all. Can you pass me that box?”

“You were shaking,” Kuvira places her hand on the box to keep it in place when she sees you walk over to grab it yourself. “Is that… Is that what happened every time I…?” She can’t seem to bring herself to say it, so you do.

“Every time you cheated on me?” You place your hands on your hips and sigh. “Just drop it Kuvira.” You rip the box out from under her grasp and walk away. Bile rises in your throat as those pesky images you’d dream up every time she was gone appear in your mind.

You set the box down harder than you mean to and the sound of something breaking has you cursing under your breath. Bolin isn’t here to spar with, to help calm you down with uppercuts and swift kicks to the shins.

Kuvira is stunned, left standing at the other side of the kitchen counter as she tries to make sense of her raging thoughts. Cheated. You're not wrong, but hearing you say it hurts. She never called it that, knowing if she did she’d have to admit what she was doing was wrong. And she could never be wrong, at least not then.

So she called it punishments because then she could justify what she was doing. It’s not like she liked doing it because she didn’t but it seemed to be the best way to control you at the time. It won’t matter if she says that though, she knows it’s wrong and if anything it’ll make this situation worse.

“I-I’m sorry,” she says softly, saying it makes her internally cringe, but she does mean it. You let out a huff, ignoring her as you open up the box. All the adrenaline of trying to save the day has left you, honestly, it left you around the time they slapped that stupid tracker onto your ankle but the lack of sleep and her trying to confront something you’d rather stay buried is getting to you.

When you go to pick up the broken dish the sharp edge cuts across your hand, you hiss out in pain and jerk your hand towards your chest, it’s not a deep cut but it still hurts like a bitch. Blood begins to seep out and the sight of that sickening deep red liquid coating your palm has Kuvira panicking.

Suddenly she’s back in the trunk with her heart in your hands as she watched you bleed out. Her hands feel warm and coated in the thickness of your blood once more. Her heart begins to race, deep in the back of her mind she knows it’s just a small cut but it’s only been a few weeks since you were so close to death.

Ignoring the fight at hand she rushes over to gently cradle your hand and pull it close, you yank your hand out of her grasp, her eyes shoot up to look at you with pinched brows. “I need to clean it, just let me clean it.” Her voice shakes as she desperately tries to take your hand back.

“I can’t…” This furious look settles on your features as you glare into her eyes before storming away towards the bathroom. She turns to follow you, her heart is pounding at the memories pouring out from the box she’s tried to shove them in. “I can’t look at you right now!”

The slam of the door effectively ends any chance of her chasing after you.

A couple of weeks goes by, the walls have now been painted the green you wanted and your dad brought over a second bookcase, then helped move the couch with Kuvira. He stops by often with baked goods and a fresh bouquet to replace the last. After that first day of moving in your mother doesn’t stop by though, he says she’ll come around, that she just needs time.

But Kuvira sees the crestfallen look that takes over your features every time you open the door, and she’s not there. It’s a Friday night, and he’s come over to help cook.

Things have been tense between you and Kuvira, you can’t seem to look her in the eyes. She’s tried multiple times to get you to look at her, but each time you keep your gaze trained on something behind her or her forehead.

What she doesn’t know is every time you do accidentally look at her, betrayal seeps through you as you remember all those nights alone. You don’t want to be filled with anger and hurt every time you look at her, but you don’t know what to do. Saying that word out loud, cheated, has opened a door you kept locked tight, spirits you had built a wall in front of it after that first time.

But now it’s blown off the hinges and fills you up, threatening to spill at any moment. You're sure your dad notices, but he thankfully doesn’t comment. He’s commandeered Kuvira to fill the dumplings, saying “these are her favorite, anytime she got sick or upset I’d make these for her and everything would be okay again.”

You ignore him as he tries to converse with Kuvira, her replies are short and awkward as she doesn’t know how to conduct herself around him yet. Opening up a bottle of wine for yourself you try to work on the broth for the soup, desperately trying to tune her out. You love your father so much and you're happy to be near him again, but you wish he’d just go home.

Meanwhile, Kuvira is loving his company, not only does it force you to be civil, but she gets a chance to get on his good side. She knows how much your parents mean to you and whilst it will probably take a village to get your mother to like her again, she thinks she has a shot with your dad.

“And then! Oh, I think she was five when she realized what her mark meant, it was so adorable she-” Your dad laughs, suddenly you're filled with embarrassment as he continues. “She asked if they would be pretty.”

You know he has good intentions but spirits now is not the time to bring up stupid soulmates. Does he not feel the tension between the two of you? You know that if he does, it’s probably slipped his mind that it’s not over something small. Your parents never had to worry about what to do if the other cheats on you multiple times whilst watching you suffer.

You fill up a glass for yourself, pouring it past the socially acceptable amount, and take a big sip before filling up two glasses for them. Part of you wants to be petty and not fill one up for her but your dad will point it out if you do. That bitter voice in your head reminds you of how Kuvira once shamed you for drinking. Fuck that.

“Between you and me I think she thinks you're pretty so five-year-old her would be very happy.” Kuvira coughs, letting out a chuckle as she shakes her head, not that you see since your back is turned. “I don’t know about that,” is her modest reply.

To hear stories about your childhood feels like a perfectly wrapped present to Kuvira. It makes her feel close to you despite your current circumstances and to hear about how obsessed you were with soulmates makes her want to wrap you up and shower you with love.

But the problem with this story is it makes Kuvira think about all the shitty things she did to you. To hear about all the excitement and joy you showed over one day meeting her has made her feel ashamed of the person you got stuck with. Do you wish someone else was her? Have you ever thought about the what-ifs?

You hear your dad let out a chuckle and say “No, don’t be so negative.” If she replies you don’t hear it, soon after the topic is dropped as they focus back on the task at hand. Your grip on the wooden spoon is so tight you wonder if you can snap it in half. It hurts your fingers and that slight pain offers some kind of relief.

“So you pinch it like thi-”

“I’ll be right back,” you say, leaving the broth to boil as you hastily walk over to the bathroom and lock the door behind you. Kuvira watches you go with a frown, everyday it seems you have to lock yourself away from her. Like her presence is just so unbearable that you’d rather hide in a bathroom and miss out on time with your dad.

You catch the sight of yourself in the mirror and glare back at the unrecognizable person staring back at you. Your face is flushed from embarrassment and there’s this hint of rage lingering in your gaze that wasn’t always there.

You’ve never been this kind of angry person before, you were raised around flowers and cupcakes, books filled with great adventures and laughter echoing through your home. People who’d go to the moon and back for you.

Your mom could get a bit angry at times and when she did she’d go take it out on one of those training dummies at her work. There was hardly ever any yelling in your home and never once did you sense animosity between your parents growing up. This new environment was stress-inducing and it made you want to throw all the glass plates against the wall.

You bring your hands up to your cheeks and sigh. When you were younger you were badly bullied at school for being so quiet, if anything the teasing words and tugs on your hair just made you cave inward on yourself instead of lashing out.

You’d cry into your parent's arms as you asked them why no one wanted to be friends with you and your father helped you find solace in the solitary kind of activities to help bring you happiness.

When you signed up for the dance troupe that was a big step for you, which sounds ridiculous since you were nineteen, but that was something that required being around others and communicating with them. Both of your parents were thrilled at you finally branching out and had taken you to a celebratory dinner after your first practice.

They were your best friends, you looked up to them and admired the love they still evidently held for one another, soulmates or not love seemed to dwindle over the years for most couples. And now you're here, in your bathroom of the apartment you share with your soulmate which should fill you with joy but instead you're on the verge of tears as you try to push down that burning flame within.

If your dad ever cheated on your mom she’d slap him across the face and leave. If your mom cheated on your dad he’d cry so hard, but he’d leave as well. They always told you things like that were unacceptable when you’d tell them about all the school drama (not that you were ever involved in it) and now here you are. Feeling ashamed of all those years when she walked all over you, you wonder what would your parents think? You pull at the roots of your hair, no longer able to stomach the sight of yourself.

You hate all of this and you can’t look her in the eyes but if given the chance you know you won’t leave, and it’s not because of that soulmate bullshit. It’s because of those quiet moments spent in each other's arms when it seemed like the world ceased to exist, where you’d giggle as she’d rub her nose against yours. Where you felt safe and seen and loved.

You want those moments back, you want to not hate the sight of her but it seems anytime you so much as hear her voice you're on edge. You’re shaking due to the wave of anger and sadness that washes over you as you seem to get trapped in your thoughts.

It’s happening more and more, you zone out most days and seem to think of every little bad thing she’s done. It feels like molten hot lava is poured over you every time it happens. The knock on the door makes you jump up in shock, so lost in your thoughts you tuned the rest of the world out.

“The dumplings are ready,” you hear your dad say. You look up in the mirror and internally groan, you’ve made a mess of your hair and your eyes are bloodshot from crying.

“Uhm,” you clear your throat “I’ll be out in a minute.”

“Okay, we’ll be setting up the table.” You nod, not realizing he can’t see you as you try to fix your appearance which is a task in itself.

The dinner is awkward, it consists of spoons gently tapping against glass bowls and your father desperately trying to fill in the silence, he eyes you the whole time, probably expecting a smile to appear because dumplings fix everything, except this time they don’t. She feels bad for your dad, he really is trying to make you happy. Should she tell him it’s no use? That the only thing that will make you happy is probably her disappearance?

Anytime she looks your way you take a sip of your wine, you have to refill it thrice and it seems to drag on for hours despite the alcohol in your system. Kuvira does try to chime in as she tries to get on your father's good side but you are only able to let out nods of acknowledgment or forced chuckles at little anecdotes.

He leaves after helping you clean the dishes, much to Kuvira’s chagrin. With him around, he was a nice buffer for the two of you, a pleasant way to fill the uncomfortable silence that filled your home.

You’ve just finished wiping down the counters when she tries. “Y/n…”

“No.” You immediately reply, heading to your shared room to get in bed before her, like you always do.

A day later your mom finally shows up. She knows this is a private moment and to be honest she fears your mother's wrath. The way she glared at her when she opened the door had her wanting to hide away. She had said something about needing to talk to you, how the dumplings didn’t work which had Kuvira severely confused. But she didn’t question it.

So she lets your mom make tea while she tried to coax you out of the room. By the time you finally leave Kuvira sees that your mother is in the garden, patiently waiting. When you walk out of your bedroom you find her in the garden, sitting at the little iron table they got for you.

You watch Kuvira lock herself in your bedroom as you sit down across from your mom. There're two teacups filled with piping hot jasmine tea and a plate of cookies your father probably baked.

Neither of you speaks the first few moments, you both spend the time sipping from your cups and watching the bustling of the streets, it must be lunchtime.

“Why haven’t you stopped by?”

Your mom sighs as she sets the teacup down, “honestly I just… I have a hard time with all of this. With her and with your arrest.”

“Well, I did stand by while a bunch of horrible things happened mom. I understand why she arrested me,” you pick up one of the sugar cookies and bite into it. That all too familiar anger is bubbling within you once more.

“Yes, but as a Lieutenant of the guard it’s made people deem me unworthy of my job.” You tense at her words, you didn’t know people were giving her grief about your actions. It’s not like she encouraged you to leave. “And… I am just having a hard time getting used to her and everything she’s done.”

“She knows what she did was wrong, she was being cornered in Ba Sing S-”

“I don’t mean what she did to the earth kingdom, I mean what she did to you.” Looking down at the dark amber color of your tea, you slump your shoulders as you think of her words.

“I mean I’ll support whatever you decide but it’s hard for me to look at her knowing she kept you a secret, so she could keep up some charade with that Junior-” you tuck your hands under your lap at his name, trying to keep from clenching them, “and I’ve seen photos of him holding her and even kissing her, none of it is right.”

Biting your lip to keep from crying you look away from her, at the streets that have since calmed down a bit. You focus on a child holding his mother's hand as he kicks up water at the fountain. He’s laughing, his grin so wide it takes up the majority of his features. He looks so happy and carefree. You want that kind of life, wishing you could trade his with yours.

“It was only kissing, right?” When you don’t immediately reply, she continues “y/n what happened in those three years?”

“I…” you snap your mouth shut as you suddenly feel like you're about to cry. You can’t look at her, you’ll know she’ll be disappointed in you. “It was a couple of times to placate him, he’d been getting suspicious due to her lack of affection.”

And I’d angered her in some way, it was usually that.

You don’t say that though, deciding to keep it to yourself. You hear the sound of glass breaking and whip your head around to see the handle of your mother's teacup broken into tiny pieces, the cup slips from her hand and falls onto the table, causing it to shatter. Hot tea splatters onto the table and seeps through the holes within it, some liquid gets on your shirt and you jump back in surprise.

“Fuck, I’m sorry honey,” she says, going to grab one of the napkins to wipe up the excess tea. Her voice shakes with rage and you can see her jaw clenching so tight it looks like it’s about to snap. While she cleans no one talks, what do you even say? So instead you busy yourself by picking up a cookie and snapping it in half, when she leaves you’ll pick up the glass shards off the ground.

“You know…” Your mother clenches the wet cloth in her hand, trying to control her tone. “You know that’s wrong, right?”

“Yes, I do but what am I meant to do?” She opens her mouth to reply but stops herself when she sees the telltale sign of you being on the verge of tears. “I can’t look at her without imagining it but fuck mom I still love her.”

It’s silent for a few beats, you can see the cogs turning in her mind. You don’t know if you want to know what’s going through her head, probably disappointment at your unwillingness to leave Kuvira. She sighs and gently sets the dirty napkin onto the table, her eyes lowered to stare at a shard that has half a panda lily painted on it, the other half had broken off during the fall. The incompleteness of it is sort of beautiful.

“If you want to stay with her, you both need to seek professional help because this relationship is unhealthy and can’t continue this way.” She runs her hands through her hair, smoothing it back as she stares at you, “I can have a friend of mine come over to talk with the both of you, she specializes in things like this.”

“Really?”

“Yes but it’s not something that’ll be fixed right away. From the sounds of it, it’ll take years before the two of you can get to a healthy place.” Your shoulders slump at that, why is nothing easy anymore? Why can’t it go back to cinnamon-scented afternoons while helping your dad at his shop where the most difficult task at hand was tying a perfect bow.

“I’ll do it.”

#kuvira #kuvira x reader #kuvira/reader #kuvira fanfic #lok #lok fanfic #legend of korra #fanfiction #the great trial

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andorlorian · 4 years ago

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a little bit insane ahsoka and luke au

the lovely @picazos-angsty-typist inspired me to just post my au ideas as opposed to giving them away, and this one is my absolute favorite! it's an au in which 19 year old ahsoka finds the time travel crystal from the lego star wars christmas special and is transported onto tatooine right before a new hope. then she gets to go along through the original trilogy and be best friends with luke! (this is honestly just an extremely convoluted way to get my favorite characters to be best friends. this au is for me <3.) extremely long elaborations and plot stuff in bullet points under the cut:

okay so 19 year old ahsoka! it would be about 2 years post order 66 and about 6-8 months since the ending of the ahsoka novel, so she's traveling the world and doing fulcrum things, attempting to build a rebellion with bail organa. this, naturally, means she needs to hide from the empire.

because it needs to be life day for the crystal to work, that's the day this all starts (in ahsoka's original timeline). ahsoka finds out randomly that it's life day, and has a moment remembering the day before order 66, before the empire.

she gets into a skirmish with the empire close by kordoku, the planet with the time travel stone on it. she feels a pull from the force, like there's a safe haven on the planet below, so she lands and immediately knows why: she's in front of a jedi temple. she knows she'll be safe inside from the empire. she walks in, and seals the temple with the force

she picks up the weird rock thing in the middle of the room, as it's singing to her through the force. the second she touches it, a wormhole opens up, and she's dropped directly in the middle of a tatooinian sandstorm.

we the audience know that she's time traveled, but ahsoka has no clue. and as I'm assuming she doesn't have much experience wandering ancient abandoned jedi temples (in her time, very recently, they'd been populated and upkept), she wouldn't suspect she was hallucinating. she assumed the rock somehow teleported her, but the sand and the wind of the sandstorm make it impossible for her to find the rock. where before it had been singing to her through the force, she couldn't feel anything now.

she has no choice but to try and find shelter from the storm and wait it out. she finds a sort of cave, a small hideout, so she sets up her small camp. having nothing else to do, she opens herself up to the force to meditate, hoping to locate the rock and find more information about her new situation. however, she instead discovers something she wasn't expecting: the faint and utterly familiar force prescence of one obi-wan kenobi

it feels damaged and weak, almost as if he'd cut himself off from the force somewhat, but there was no denying that it was obi-wan. ahsoka thanked the force for sending her to the rock, as she assumes it had just sent her to obi-wan and nothing else.

during this force meditation, she also discovers the planet that she's on is tatooine. this heavily reminds her of anakin, hearing echoes of their conversation as they crossed the desert from what seems like a million years ago.

once the storm settles, she makes her way through the tatooinian desert, and just as the suns are coming up and she knows she would need to find shelter, she happens upon the Lars farm.

she meets Owen and Beru Lars and their nephew, Luke. they are kind and good people, and do not hesitate to offer ahsoka a place to stay + some food and water. ahsoka rests up somewhat, but insists on helping them in return.

this part I haven't quite nailed out yet. tatooine side quest featuring ahsoka and luke doing whatever one does on a moisture farm. I assume ahsoka would offer technological help as she's a good mechanic (perks of master skywalker) so maybe they're going around and fixing vaporators?

that day and into the night, she and luke really hit it off. she learns more about tatooine and more about how they've been affect by the war. however from the way luke talks about it, the empire has been around as long as he can remember. this strikes ahsoka as extremely odd, and wonders what else is going on, but fixing things doesn't leave much room for another galaxy warping revelation, so she doesn't dwell on it immediately.

she and luke discuss kind of everything. they become buddies bc that's important to me. the next day, she tells them she's looking for obi-wan kenobi. "do you know someone named obi-wan kenobi?" luke does his little "do you think she means old ben kenobi?" number which is fun n nostalgic hehe.

owen seems to freeze. he hasn't heard that name in quite some time, and it doesn't exactly conjure pleasant memories. he reluctantly agrees to let luke point her in the right direction, and she buys a speeder from them (they try to give it to her but she insists on paying. ahsoka ftw)

ahsoka manages to avoid the tuskens on her way into the jundland wastes and runs into.... this really old dude. this is when she really has to confront the time travel of it all. she and obi-wan have a Talk. there's still a little bad blood between them considering obi-wan was on the council that condemned her without remorse or apology, but they're both so relieved to see the other alive.

ahsoka learns that it's been 19 years since order 66, since the empire took over. she remembers the day it happened, what only feels like 2 years ago to her.

she mentions that luke helped her find him, and obi-wan freezes. this obviously gets noticed by ahsoka, and obi-wan drops the real bomb on her: luke is anakin and padmé's son. obi-wan tells her that anakin died in order 66 and padmé died with the rebellion, that he's here both to hide out and to protect luke. she remarks in her head that the whole chosen one thing is ridiculous, that pinning the entire galaxy's hopes on a nineteen year old kid that up until now obi-wan has refused to even CONSIDER training (skywalker trauma lolz) but she can sense the strong emotions from him, that he wouldn't have it in him to stand up to the empire alone, so she drops it.

as to how padmé died: i hate the way that she dies in the prequels so I am deleting it. this is my canon. she actually survives and stays with the rebellion for a good 3-5 years before she's killed in a rebel vs. empire conflict. ahsoka is especially devastated to learn about her death from obi-wan (who bail organa risked communication with to tell him, as he was also close with padmé).

she and obi-wan spar, both to get Ahsoka's mind off of the everything about this situation and because it's been so long since either of them have been around another jedi. it's cathartic for both of them. (ahsoka beats obi-wan easily btw haha)

obi-wan offers to officially knight her as a jedi knight, as that was what the council had intended after the whole fiasco and he says "you're just as experienced and powerful as I was when I was knighted." but ahsoka declines. she isn't ready to be considered a jedi yet, and may never be.

this is when a new hope really starts. obi-wan and ahsoka find luke unconscious in the jundland wastes, and that sequence goes pretty much the same. r2 is beeping and trilling like crazy because ahsoka!!!!!! that's one of his best friends!!!!!!! luke is like "you know this droid?" and ahsoka freezes, because how exactly does she explain to the nice dude she met yesterday that actually she's from 17 years in the past and was very close with both of his parents, who both were extremely close to r2?

she does in fact explain all of that to him when they get to obi-wan's house. she has no idea how she got here or why, but she did know anakin skywalker and padmé amidala naberrie, and tells him as much as she remembers about them. luke misses both of his parents like an ache in his chest, wishing more than anything he could have known them.

obi-wan offers his own perspective on it, and tells how anakin died (which ahsoka is just as eager to know). obi-wan, on the spot, says that another jedi fell to the dark side and joined sidious, and that anakin died defending the temple. (he obviously couldn't say that vader was his pupil, because ahsoka would see through that immediately.)

luke asks why he couldn't have lived with his mother in the rebellion, but obi-wan says that she wanted him to be safe from the galactic conflict and stay with anakin's family. (which is partially true, but the whole sith-sensing-the-overly-powerful-skywalkers was a big factor as well.) obi-wan says he's truly sorry that luke never got to know her.

after learning about the message r2 brought, ahsoka knows she has to get to the rebellion however possible and rejoin the fight. obi-wan agrees, and gives his little elevator pitch to luke about becoming a jedi and joining the rebellion. when obi-wan gives luke the lightsaber, a million memories with anakin flash through ahsoka's head. luke still comes to same conclusion at the end of that conversation: he's willing to guide them out of tatooine, but he can't join the galactic conflict, at least not now.

however, as they're leaving, they find the destroyed jawa crawler. luke, as before, realizes it means the stormtroopers found his family. ahsoka knows that only despair waits there for him, and urges him not to go, but when he doesn't back down hops in the speeder with him (for protection and emotional support).

luke gets to have more emotions about the fact that the empire killed his /entire family./ ahsoka doesn't try and use it to convince him to go, only offers to help him bury them. she openly uses the force to move things around and make things easier, while luke is still in shock, almost numb. they're buried next to shmi and cliegg.

luke is ANGRY at the empire. he is PISSED. he decides to go with them to fight not because he longs for adventure, but because he wants to hit the empire where it hurts. ahsoka can recognize that isn't the thought process of a jedi, but she feels the exact same way after learning about anakin and padmé.

now it's mos eisley time. i feel like han would definitely like/admire ahsoka at first, but ahsoka would not like him. she finds him deplorable and a little annoying, and joins in on the whole bagging on the falcon jokes. this leads to han getting his feelings hurt and he's like fine :( we are not friends then >:(.

the interesting thing is that chewie and ahsoka actually know each other! they were both kidnapped by bossk and hunted for sport in that one clone wars arc, so they're both like "oh hey person who was there for one of the most terrifying and traumatic times in my life! what's up!" they become fast friends yet again, and chewie is like "wow you did not age at all. are you sure you're not a wookiee?"

on the millennium falcon, she and obi-wan get started on luke's training. he asks her about his parents constantly (what they were like, what they did, where they came from, etc). she also talks about what the jedi were like (providing a less rose-colored-glasses perspective, but still with a lot of positives).

she feel the same pain obi-wan does right before they get to alderaan, and can feel bail and breha organa in particular (having known them fairly well after the ahsoka novel).

they get pulled into the death star's tractor beam. ahsoka can feel the cold and horrible presence of vader, a sick dread building in her the closer they get to it. they go to hide under the floorboards of the falcon. han knows how the empire operates better than anyone, which ahsoka is shocked to learn is much different than the Republic or the empire she remembers. (i imagine she lived in a more transitional period, so while the empire was terrible during her time, they were only getting started.)

she tries to go with obi-wan to shut off the power beam, but obi-wan still does his "I must go alone" little number. sensing the end of something, but not what it is, she hugs him goodbye. he's still obi-wan and she missed him dreadfully. he tells her to protect luke.

she along with luke refuses to indulge han's obi-wan slander, and when han says "great at getting us into trouble!" she says "you should have met anakin."

then it's princess rescue time as it should be. that goes exactly the same except ahsoka is much better at defending them from the stormtroopers lol. leia still does the blasting and "somebody has to save our skins!" line because I love that

ahsoka can tell immediately that leia is padmé's daughter. she had probably heard of leia, being in the rebellion for about six months before time traveling, but now having met her it's completely obvious. she doesn't vocalize this immediately though, planning to discuss it with obi-wan.

yes I'm keeping the garbage monster scene because I think it's funny :)

ahsoka goes with han and chewie after the stormtroopers while luke and leia head for the ship. also ahsoka + han banter because I think it's funny

she can see obi-wan and vader's fight (which I'm hoping will be a lot more like their fight in rots. a new hope is incredible but the lightsaber fights got way better as time went on. their final fight deserves to be epic). she tries to run and help obi-wan but luke pulls her back. "he can handle it," he says. "we need you to help us get to the falcon."

however when obi-wan is killed, both of them are distraught. his voice appears in ahsoka's head, telling her not to face vader yet, telling her to run. chewie literally has to hold her back and carry her to the ship.

they blast their way out of the death star, none of them having the time to dwell on what just happened.

ahsoka and luke are both numb. luke lost 3 parental figures in one day, and obi-wan's death after going through order 66 just brings it allll up again. leia is also hanging out in the numb dead parents circle, because her entire planet got blown up today and obi-wan's death just feels like another nail in the coffin. all three of them can sort of feel each other's emotions, and unconsciously they're comforting each other with the force. it's a healing moment for all three of them

han is kind of awkwardly standing in the background. "there wasn't anything any of you could have done," he says, in a rare show of emotion. (i like han wanting to help them despite his i-don't-care-about-anything facade.)

this doesn't stop him from saying he's only in it for the money later though. leia gets to blow up at him about it same as in the movie because she deserves it methinks.

they make it to the rebellion, and a few of the people who've been in it from the beginning recognize her (mon mothma maybe?). I also like the idea of ahsoka being something of rebellion legend, having been one of the last jedi who presumably died fighting the empire for the rebellion.

also general hera syndulla gets to be there bc i love her. she is the one who shows the plans to the pilots and explains the plan. she also references the rogue one crew because i love them also.

ahsoka in an x-wing with the red team attempting to blow up the death star. when vader makes an appearance, she can sense him in the starfighter nearby them, the same cold and evil presence. she personally goes to fight vader and defends the rest of the team from him, somehow falling into a perfect rhythm and anticipating every move. she doesn't kill him obviously, but she gets close. the things that happen stay the same: they sustain heavy casualties, she survives the battle, han comes back to save the day, luke is the one who blows up the death star.

luke, han, chewie, and ahsoka get medals in the end, because each of them were instrumental in the blowing up of the death star (and a lot more pilots survive thanks to Ahsoka's defense). there are references to the phineas and ferb star wars special because I want it.

there's a bit after the official end of a new hope in which she's talking to Luke like "I can't stay. this isn't my timeline. I have to go back. and if I can go back, maybe I can try and save the jedi. maybe I can fix things." however luke changes her mind. "maybe you're in this timeline for a reason. maybe NOW is when you can change things. I would've died without you in the battle of yavin. plus, how am I supposed to become a jedi without you?" luke + leia + han + chewie + r2 + 3po all convince her to stay. they are all very attached to ahsoka at this point, and ahsoka realizes she doesn't really want to leave them either.

also. because the battle is over and they all have a moment to breathe, she tells leia that she's positive she's padmé and anakin's daughter too, not just because of the physical resemblence but also her force sensitivity. there's no doubt about it.

ahsoka agrees to train both of them in what she knows, though she warns that she wasn't a master or even a knight.

it ends with the whole crew hanging out on the falcon (han, leia, luke, chewie, r2, c-3po, and ahsoka)

those are my bullet points for the episode IV section of this! if people want to see where this goes in the rest of the trilogy let me know I have so many notes about this au

also tagging: @togrutanduin @padme--amygdala @bisexualobiwanrights @grimthejedisith @senator-nahberries you get to watch me lose my mind in real time <3

#word count: 3.0k #and this is only the first installment if I ever write this it's going to be so long #the original trilogy #ahsoka tano #luke skywalker #it's loving ahsoka hours #luke is my favorite himbo #my writing #? never used that tag before maybe I should?#ryn dot fic #ryn dot text

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chaoticowlpost · 5 years ago

Text

yall, when I tell you that the forces of nature did not want me to post this, fr. First, it gets deleted when my laptop randomly restarted, and then I accidentally press “answer privately” when it wasn’t finished BHDJFS

In light of those events, I sincerely apologize to @swagfictonreadingnerd not only losing your ask, but flooding your messages in panic jhbfsjbfjjsd it’s quite embarrassing, especially when I realized that there was a (not as updated) copy saved on wordcounter.net, but I hope you like it <3

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“Stay with me?”

Draco only came up to the Gryffindor tower because he had lent Harry his notes, and the only reason he agreed to enter this time was because he said he’d probably have to wait a while, alone outside, since they were probably buried under piles of stuff in his dorm.

However, as Harry was handing him the notes when he reached the bottom of the staircase in the Gryffindor common room, he took hold of Draco’s hand, brushing his thumb over the webbed skin connecting his thumb and forefinger.

“In here?” Draco clarified, eyes scanning the room. Various students from different years were still milling about the common room despite the fact that lunch had just ended and it was a weekend.

“Yeah,” Harry confirmed with a small nod. He leaned his shoulder against the wall, tugging Draco closer to him before wrapping an arm around his waist. “It beats studying in those uncomfortably library chairs.”

He had a point, Draco conceded.

“Why can’t we do it in your room?” Draco asked, keenly aware of the attention they were drawing. It was no secret that they were together, but it seems that the novelty has yet to ware off on many of the students.

“Do you really want to hear Dean and Seamus going at it?” Harry asked with a small smirk, which only widened when Draco visibly shuddered.

“Is that why you didn’t take as long as I was expecting?” he asked, feeling both amused and disturbed.

“They forgot their silencing charm,” Harry shrugged, nodding.

“We could always go down to Slytherin,” Draco offered, somewhat hopefully. “It’s most likely empty in my room.”

Despite the fact that they were whispering, their words still felt loud to Draco, even though he couldn’t properly make out what they were saying. He was just able to catch their names every now and then.

“But we’re already here,” Harry practically whinged, his thumb brushing softly over Draco’s hip. “It won’t be so bad, I promise.”

Without waiting to hear his response, he began leading them towards one of the empty sofas that were surrounding the hearth, weaving through the wide-eyed students that were still staring at the pair.

Unceremoniously, he flopped down on the sofa, spreading himself into a more comfortable position. Harry looked at him expectantly, watching as Draco fiddled with the corner of his parchments awkwardly.

He gave him an amused smile before reaching out to grab him by the wrist before pulling him towards the sofa, making him stumble and trip, landing embarrassingly on top of him with a soft grunt.

“I hate you,” Draco grumbled, trying to move so that he wouldn’t be sprawled on top of his boyfriend.

“Just give me a second,” Harry laughed, his chest rumbling from beneath him. He began shifting around, guiding Draco and himself into a more comfortable position where he was on his side, against the backrest, while holding Draco in front of him.

Draco reached down for his abandoned bag and fished for one of the books he brought with him from their quick stop to the library. He used it to try and hide his face from those who were, undoubtedly, staring at them.

“I still say we should have gone to my room,” Draco said softly, eyes set on the text, but not quite processing what it says.

“Relax,” Harry whispered, slithering an arm around his waist and pulling him closer to his chest. “I’ll let you study in peace, if it helps.”

“It most certainly does not,” Draco responded haughtily, earning himself a laugh from Harry. It didn’t, because suddenly Harry’s fingers were playing with his hair, and that was all he could focus on after that.

He didn’t respond after that, except for a small hmph, and tried to force himself to digest the contents of his book. He wasn’t about to let his grades drop because Harry wanted to cuddle. In public, no less.

Except, maybe he’d consider, because Harry was peppering soft kisses behind his ear, slowly moving up towards the top of his head while his fingers continued twirling a lock of hair between them.

“Stop that,” Draco protested halfheartedly. It felt quite nice, actually, despite the heating of his face.

“Why?” Harry murmured into the base of his neck. Draco felt him grin against his sin before propping himself on his elbow to lean over and place a kiss on Draco’s cheek.

“You’re making people stare,” Draco hisses, not wanting to be heard. He was pretty sure he heard some 4th Years giggle, though.

“Then stop paying attention to them,” Harry hummed. “Let them stare. You’re my boyfriend, so they ought to get used to it.”

Boyfriend.

The fluttering of his heart whenever Harry called him that would likely never cease, and Harry knew that. Draco was pretty sure he took advantage of that fact as often as he could, because that’s the only possible explanation for why he was still sitting there on that sofa while people stared.

“It’s not proper, Potter,” he hissed, not wanting to be heard by the other occupants in the room. He was pretty sure he heard Harry snort softly.

“Fine, then,” Harry said. Draco felt his body shift from behind him, and he half-expected Harry to just get up so that they could more to a more private location.

He was about to apologize and just give in before he was manhandled, the arm around his waist tightening as he was hauled up until he was fully rested on Harry’s chest, their noses brushing against one another’s.

“This is not better,” he glared, feeling his face heat up once again. He felt quite bad for those people that decided to enter their common room at that moment, only to be greeted with the sight of the two of them.

“Give me a second,” Harry snorted before wriggling a bit to the side, rolling over and dropping Draco in the newly formed space between him and the backrest of the sofa.

“I don’t see how this is better,” Draco huffed, still clutching his book. Harry rolled onto his side before returning his arm to its previous position, holding him close.

In this position, Draco was mostly hidden by the backrest of the sofa, and anything else left exposed was mostly covered by Harry, who had taken it upon himself to practically drape his body over Draco’s.

“This is.... adequate,” Draco huffed, finding himself slowly smiling at the situation.

“Good,” Harry beamed, placing a soft kiss on the tip of his nose. “So, can you focus on your studying, now?”

Draco thought it was quite silly of him to think that he would return to studying. He was warm, comfortable, and in the arms of his boyfriend.

He was going to nap.

“Sure,” he said anyway, not making any move to re-open his book, Instead, he snuggled deeper into Harry’s chest, burying his face in the crook of his neck.

Again, another laugh from Harry. The hand returned to his head, playing with his hair once more while Harry whispered sweet words into his ear.

And somehow, the feeling of everyone’s eyes on them, and the soft murmurs probably preparing the latest gossip, faded into nothing as he allowed himself to be engulfed by the comfort of just being with Harry.

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#hp #harry potter #draco malfoy #drarry #drarry ficlet #request #fluff #drarry fanfic #8th year #im so sorry to swagfictonreadingnerd

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