#he also started dating his next partner like a week or two after breaking up with me

[crvstybowlofcereal]

this is a really specific vent(?) post. im processing things by putting them in words. its not serious, feel free to ignore me lol

i just want to say that a couple years ago when i was in the beginning stages of researching autism (and would soon realize i am most likely autistic) i was in a relationship. and communication in a relationship is So Very important to me. I would constantly ask how he was (obviously it was more specific to whatever situation was going on) and he would always say he was fine. If I had even the Slightest hint that he wasn't actually Fine (like 19 times out of 20) i would continue asking if he was sure and if he wanted to talk, and he continued to say he was fine. half the time i assumed he meant it and i read the situation wrong, the other half of the time i assumed he didn't want to talk about it.

he ended up breaking up with me because i

"didn't pick up on some things"

"what kind of things?" i asked

"idk, just, things."

and he had been talking to my friend (U) about our relationship, and telling her that i wasn't picking up on things. she got mad at me and we had a "fight" for a short time, she thought i was being a bad partner, and her sister (M) (who is toxic and possessive) felt like i wasn't spending enough time with her, so she complained about it to their mom, who got mad at U for it for some reason? so U also brought all that up, telling me M felt left out. (i wasn't leaving M out of anything, i was sitting with my partner at lunch half of the time, she was welcome to join, but didnt, looking back i think M has RSD and maybe i should have been more direct when moving to a new location to explicitly invite her) (U was also not in school at the time due to covid, so its not like i was spending more time with her over M, which is something M would get so upset about if she perceived it to be that way [she was incredibly possessive of me as a friend and the extent of it made me feel like an object tbh])

U never brought up the issues my partner talked about, because that's how we are, we don't make it known someone was venting to us, to respect their privacy, but it fueled her emotions during our "argument" so i really only heard her being mad at me for not including M, (which i later learned is because M's emotions were made to be her problem when they shouldn't have, this has been a running problem so it wasnt that surprising to learn) so i started spending more time with M, but it was school, and i had work, so schedules only allowed so much time, and any time I was with M (lunch and one class) was when i was also with my partner, but i had other classes with him so i assumed it was fine, but he started drifting away (also around a time i attempted to communicate something important about our relationship, which ended up making him uncomfortable, but he didn't say anything about it until we had a conversation after breaking up)

i was stuck in a place where i felt like no one around me communicated how they felt and still expected me to understand them and do what they wanted me to do

U and i recently reflected on this and realized my ex was a shitty communicator (he and his next partner also broke up because he didn't say how he felt and expected them [also most likely autistic] to... just kinda know ig?) and that she should have gotten my side of the story (she had no idea i was frequently checking on him and trying to get him to talk to me)

and that she wasnt actually upset at me about M, she was upset that people were making it her problem, and she was especially upset during this reflection to learn that M was not being left out at all, she was just doing That Thing again where she wanted me to be Her friend and Only Her friend.

U AND I ARE NOT MAD AT EACH OTHER FOR ANY OF THIS, I WAS NEVER MAD AT U AND U WAS ONLY MAD ABOUT HER PERCEPTION OF THE SITUATION, AND ONLY FOR A SHORT AMOUNT OF TIME, EVERYTHING IS FINE

so basically i went like a year and a half thinking that people were rightfully mad at me and i was too self absorbed to pay attention to other peoples' emotions and i started learning how to read people again (clearly my body language research from middle school wasn't cutting it anymore) only for me to realize i just need people to be a little more direct that allistic people typically are, and those specific people were just being dogshit at communicating, (even for allistic people, relative to my needs)

anyways highschool post-covid was Really Fucking Weird and socially stressful for me

TL;DR reflecting on my communication needs not only not being met, but being far undershot for even a "normal" persons needs and how i was convinced I was the problem because of circumstances

[pathologicalreid]

doctor and doctor | S.R.

in which you add a degree to your repertoire

who? spencer reid x fem!reader

category: fluff

content warning: i tried my best and the process described is pretty accurate to my graduate school but there might be some discrepancies. mentions of marriage and anxiety.

word count: 470

a/n: my brain has been rotting this finals week so i just needed some good academic validation fluff to write. i also got in a car accident this morning (I'm fine lol someone hit my car) so fluff was mandatory. hoping to get a lot of writing done over the school break.

There was an old joke that only five people would ever read your dissertation, you, your supervisor, your two examiners, and your unlucky partner or spouse who has to act as an unpaid proofreader for you. It was something you had heard for the past four years.

Of course, in your case, your boyfriend had three PhDs of his own and was more than happy to read through your dissertation, even though it was pushing five hundred pages.

The BAU’s jet had just landed after a three-day case in Georgia, and you had just hung up after talking with Spencer. You complained about feeling like a sitting duck, waiting to hear from your doctoral advisor to see if your thesis was accepted, and he told you he imagined it wouldn’t be long now.

You had been offered a teaching position starting in the new semester, but it was contingent on your dissertation being approved.

That all led to the email sitting in your inbox, you left your laptop open on the kitchen counter, leaving the email unopened, which is how Spencer found you when he got home.

“Angel?” He said, slightly alarmed, you stood still in the kitchen, watching your laptop like it was going to combust.

Pointing at the device, you took a deep breath, “I got the email.”

Hastily, he set his bag on the couch of your shared apartment before joining you in the kitchen. “Did you look at it?” He asked, leaning over and looking at the screen that displayed your still unopened email. You shook your head, “Were you going to?”

“What if they didn’t accept it?” You whispered, not moving your eyes from the screen.

He waited a moment, “Do you want me to open it?”

You shook your head again, “No, I’ll do it.” You told him, in a sudden surge of bravery, you leaned forward and clicked on the email. Automatically, the email popped up with a burst of confetti – an effect from your email browser recognizing the word ‘congratulations.’ You gasped and Spencer wrapped his arms around you, holding you tight.

It all faded away. The nerves from the past four years, because you had done it.

“I’m so proud of you,” Spencer murmured. “So, so proud.”

You twisted in his arms to look at the screen and read the email in its entirety. “My degree will be officially conferred on the next date designated by the university. Oh, my goodness,” you said, overwhelmed. “I really got my PhD!” You said excitedly, bouncing on the balls of your feet.

“So, when we get married, we’ll both be Dr. Reid,” Spencer said, glancing over at the email before looking down at you fondly.

Your smile spanned from ear to ear, “Yeah!” You said excitedly, the smile dropping from your face, “Wait, what?”

[adventuringblind]

Breaking Point

LandOscar x Reader

Genre: angst

Summary: the tragedy and revival of Lando Norris and Max's sister as told by mostly Lestappen

Warning: sexual and physical abuse. Panic attacks, hospitals, injury descriptions

Notes: I'm sorry to the Carlos girlies for my crimes. T_T he was just a good villain for this story, and I feel so bad about it because he's wickedly out of character.

Masterlist

When Max thought about his sister dating a driver, he thought that meant one. No, instead she's dragging Max to talk to her partners. Plural. Meaning: more then one.

It's not that he doesn't like it. It's just a little shocking, is all. He figured her and Lando would get together eventually since they were similar in age. He didn't know that Carlos was also in the picture.

But Carlos is good guy, loyal, a provider like Max himself.

Plus Carlos is Charles' teammate and they get long. Charles tells him all the time that they have a fun working relationship. The same Charles who is ready to murder Jos.

The Monegasque and him had gotten together in 2020 right after they came back from lockdown. They moat certainly did not follow protocols.

Charles has just dragged Max and his sister into the Leclerc family. A place that they feel welcomed and safe.

Needless to say that Charles adopted the protective older brother role over Max's sister. So when he starts noticing things happening around the garage with Carlos, he's immediately on the hunt for what's happening.

The first sign something has gone wrong is halfway through 2021, about six months into the relationship between Max's sister and her two partners. Living in an abusive household has give all the Verstappen children a unique was of sensing when somethings not right. And right now, it's written all over his sisters face as her and Lando are sitting in Max's driver room.

"How come you're here and not with Carlos?" He asked. They shared a wary glance and shrugged.

"Wanted to see you for a while." Was the excuse.

Charles is the next to notice something. A month after the first incident, he runs into the trio arguing around the side of the Ferrari garage. He listens for a while despite him knowing it's wrong, but he can't help it.

"Both of you are idiots! Am I the only one who cares about us?"

"No! It's just-"

"Shut up and leave me. I'll see you both tonight. Be ready for me."

Charles only peaks out from his hiding space after Carlos leaves. He can see the two shaking and reassuring each other.

But arguments happen all the time, right?

Charles and Max keep a closer eye on them after that. Both the younger seem to be isolating themselves and neither if the older is happy with that.

The next incident is one the should've never happened. Max regrets not seeing it sooner. Charles blames himself for nit seeing the signs.

Their off week in Monaco is an enjoyable one. Charles and Max had gone out to a club with his sister and her partners. They were to wrapped up in each other to really pay attention to what else was happening.

Max's phone rings at an ungodly hour. He looks at the caller ID and something twists inside of him.

"Lando? Everythi-"

"Apartment. Need you please."

Lando sounds winded on the other line and panicked. Then the call ends and Max is left in silence.

He thanks the adrenaline for being able to get Charles awake and into the car. It's a painfully slow drive.

The pair gets through the front desk easily and take the stairs two at a time. They stop at the door and Max tries to listen for anything.

Nothing. Silence. An eery quite that is unatraul for the trio.

Max bangs his fist on the door. There is movment from the otherside as a latch is undone.

Carlos stands blocking the door. "Max?"

"Hey, Lando called and said-"

"Lando called?"

Charles and Max share a look. The spainard doesn't seem right. He's out of breath, his clothes are messed up, and his eyes are rapidly scanning around the area behind them.

"Can we come in? Is he okay?" Charles asks, but receives no response. Max takes matters into his own hands. The little patience he has finally vanishing as he pushes past Carlos.

Max starts searching for his sister and the Brit while Charles confines a frantic Carlos to the kitchen. The apartment is wrecked. There is broken class on the floor of the bathroom.

He stops when he gets to the bedroom. The scene before him sends his stomach up his throat. Lando is frantically trying get his sister into clothes. She's unconscious and Lando is wrecked.

"Max!"

The Dutch jumps into action and attempts to asses the situation. It looks like they were probably having sex (as much as he hates to think about it). How had it gone so wrong?

"What do you need?" He'll ask what happened after they get situated.

"She's unconscious and hasn't woken up yet and I don't know what to do." He says it in one breath. Max registers how small he sounds and the tears on the Brits cheeks.

"How did it happen?"

Max tries to remain calm, but it's getting increasingly difficult to do so as Lando is shaking his head no and continues trying to hoist the girl into his arms, but his body isn't cooperating.

Max does it for him and bundles his sister into his arms. Lando nearly falls over just walking and Max has to call Charles for help.

"Lando- I didn't mean to-"

"Stay away, Carlos. You say that everytime but you never mean it."

A pang of guilty realization hits Max. Carlos had done this? But why? What was he trying to acheive?

The Spainard doesn't follow as they leave the building. He doesn't even try to stop them.

They end up in the emergency room. Lando had failed to mention he is also hurt and now is getting stitches down his back and a brace for his knee. Charles stays with Lando while Max sits with his sister. She's awake but unable to use her vocal chords for the next month at least.

Max is taken off guard when she starts frantically crying for Lando. He does his best at soothing her like his mom and Victoria used to do.

It's hours later when they finally get to leave. Charles sets them up in the guest room of the flat then comes and joins Max on the couch in the living area.

"I don't understand what happened in the slightest." Charles tosses his legs over Max's lap.

"I do. I saw what the room looked like. My sister was unconscious and tied to the headboard." Max chokes on the last part. As if growing up with Jos wasn't painful enough. He'd take her with him even before she was an adult. They worked so hard to heal from the horrors of that house.

"Sexual and physical then? Do you think they will tell the FIA? It could get Carlos dismissed from the sport."

Max shakes his head. There are so few people who even know about their upbringing still. Sure, most have an idea, but that doesn't give any details to how bad it had been.

"One day at a time."

~~~~~

Lando is very keen on not letting her get out of bed the next day despite her best efforts. She takes to yelling at him through text to speech to at least sit up so they can process the events.

They don't get that luxury as Max and Charles are dragging them out of bed for breakfast. It looks worse then it really is, in her head. She's dealt with worse. She could handle Carlos and his anger. One which technically hadn't been her fault but she'd rather it be her then Lando who had originally taken the brunt.

They finish eating in silence. She knows Max is going to get his answer eventually, so she nods at Lando to get him to explain. No point in drawing it out.

"Thank you for coming to get us last night." The Brit starts. His hands now becoming the most intresting thing.

"Are you going to tell us what happened?"

"Things were going well for a while. It was nice and we were all happy and in love and Carlos was sweet and caring."

"But?"

"But I'm not the most well behaved person..." There is a red tint on Lando's cheeks. "Carlos had been struggling with Ferrari and needed a reprieve, and we became that for him. It was consensual and stuff, but then it felt distant. He was doing things we hadn't agreed upon and getting progressively angrier. It became something neither of us looked forward to anymore."

She catches the two older boys' looks. Max is furious and Charles looks betrayed, in a way.

"He um-" Lando breaks. His breathing is more labored then before. The female takes his hand in her own and runs her free one down his spine. "-It escalated when he finally lost patience with me. It was really bad. I've never been so scared in my life. I safeworded out but he didn't listen. Then it kept happening. Max- your sister became your stand in."

Well she was hoping he wouldn't tell Max that part. He didn't need to know the details of what Carlos did.

"We tried to ask for help a few times. Jon walked into my room amd saw us frantically covering bruises. Then Carlos got more mad and more possessive."

"The argument outside of Ferrari. Carlos said he didn't want you guys to be exposed. I thought he meant the relationship." Charles' eyes cloud with guilt. The realization hits him harder then he'd like.

"Yesterday when we went out, I knew it was going to be hard. Carlos had been frustrated more often with Max and his own team so she'd gotten the brunt of the hits for the last month. Then this guy tried a move and it was a downward spiral from there." Lando trails off the story with a shrug and reassuring squeeze to her hand.

"What made you call?" Max is very clearly trying to restrain himself.

"He had a look to him like he wasn't even present. I went to get something for him and then called you. She was already unconscious at that point and Carlos was freaking out so he stared throwing things which is how I got the cut on my back."

Max determines that they will be staying with him until further notice. He tells the staff at the front desk to not let Carlos up. They also end up having to block his number due to the sheer number of texts and missed calls.

Daniel ends up finding out because Carlos won't leave the McLaren space alone. The Austrailian becomes more like a guard dog armed with a friendly smile.

Her and Lando already had a strong bond, but sharing such an experience certainly pulls them closer together.

Things get better one pain stakingly day at a time. Aside from their polar opposite responses. Max says he's getting whiplash from it and Daniel says a few times Zak might have a stroke if Lando keeps up like he is.

Lando had become oddly defiant. He already was in certain ways, but now it's just leaking over into his everyday life. Like setting a oundary wasn't enough, being a brat in the bedroom isn't enough, simply saying no isn't an option. Lando is blatantly defiant and struggles to take any kind d of direction.

Versus his female counterpart who is much quieter. She does anything that anybody asks her to do. She rolls over for them. Because it's better to do that then make it worse for herself. A thing she learned from living with Jos.

Where Lando goes looking for attention, she is avoiding it at all costs. Nobody is sure anymore of how to help them and therapy is a slow process.

Charles reminds Max daily. "One step at a time."

~~~~~

Oscar wasn't sure about his rookie season. His entrance into the sport was not the best and he's received so much backlash that he's prepared for copious amounts if hate.

Lando is friendly with him. Certainly doesn't let himself get close, but he's there for emotional support and advice.

They warm up to eachother eventually. Lando even introduces his girlfriend to him and it feels like he's been succesful in creating some kind of trust between them. Not in a 'your my favorite person' kind of way, but a budding friendship at least.

Oscar, who is just trying to get through his rookie season, manages to screw it all up. How, You may ask, did he do this? Simple, he broke the number one rule of falling for his teammate and his girlfriend. They were not supposed to do this to him! How is he supposed to move forward normally when all he wants to do is join their cuddling session in Lando's room?! All they do is comment him and cheer him up and it does something to his brain that he doesn't like.

Well - he does like it and to much at that.

He'd been in enough relashonships over his life to pick out certain things. Namely, who is typically the more do.inate one. Whether that be life decisions or in the bedroom, it really doesn't matter, but Oscar can clearly see neither of them are.

This leaves Oscar with two options. He can leave them alone and pune in silence, or he can ask Max his opinion because the Dutch driver is honest. He chooses the Latter.

Oscar knocks on the door of the room and hears some shuffling. It swings open and it's obvious Max wasn't expecting him. Chest exposed for anyone walking by to see.

"Oscar? If this is about Lando and my sister then you can come in. Otherwise, leave me alone."

"The first one."

Max steps aside and let's Oscar in. He's met with a sprawled out Charles on the bed who is also only in sweats.

"Oscar?"

"Charles?"

"He's here about the children."

"Oh good! Please end my suffering."

Oscar drags out a chair and sits down. His mind is running every possibility of what this means. "How do I end your suffering?"

Max looks him dead in the eye. "They won't shut up about you and I'm tired of them waking me up everytime there is a decision to be made. They need reassuring for everything even if they agree. And I love my sister, but I also love to sleep."

"They talk about me?"

Charles groans in annoyance. "Non stop, mate. It never ends. Oscar this and Oscar that." He mocks.

"But before you do anything you should know that they've been through some shit together. If you hurt them after they've done so much to heal, I will not hesitate to send you into the barrier."

He thanks Max for the... encouragement? Threat? Both? And then leaves. He goes straight for Lando's room at the Hilton next.

He knocks and again gets met with a sleepy Lando. Cmust be something about tonight specifically because Lando only sleep at inconvenient times.

"Oscar! Everything alright? You look like you've run a mile or somwthing."

Oscar fumbles. He forgot how hard feeling can be. Lando let's him in and he almost just breaks. Both of them were probably all comfortable in bed before he ruined it.

"Osc? Seriously mate? If something is wrong you can tell us."

Fuck it, he's already come this far. Might as well throw all caution to the wind.

He smashes his lips down onto Lando's and pulls off. He's going to get addicted if he doesn't pull back now.

There is no response. A shared look between the two and then a smirk from the Brit which throws Oscar off entirely.

"So you think you can handle me then?"

~~~~~

Lando is very please with the way things have turned out. The duo is back to a trio with Oscar now involved.

It's a different dynamic then it was with Carlos. The Austrailian is more gentle then the Spainard ever was.

They haven't told Oscar all of the details yet. Just that he should be wary of Carlos because he can go overboard and get possessive despite them not dating anymore. Lando won't admit it to himself that sometimes he worries Carlos will actually try something that will have long term consequences.

Oscar, for what it's worth, has fended off Carlos on and off track. He's also more perceptive then Lando had initially though. Or he's just really bad at hiding his emotions. He picks up and where not to touch, things that trigger the two, their reactions to certain events. Oscar doesn't pry, but Lando knows he's catching on.

The hardest part to work through had been the sexual aspect. Talking about it only does so much after a certain point. Prior to Oscar, they'd slowly started to do things. They'd done a few joint counseling sessions that helped them talk through a plan and set some boundaries.

The Australian doesn't push to do anything. But finally, they get to a point where they can talk about it with him. The pair is certainly nervous, but he respects them, asks questions, and clarifies his own boundaries. It's such a drastic turn around from what they had before.

Oscar's patience doesn't waiver, and as they build up confidence, he also gets a but more bold. It just - it works. Lando isn't sure exactly to describe it other then he feels safe, loved, and wanted at all times of the day and it's not just from one half of his partners.

Eventually Lando is able to slip back into the, much more defiant, version of himself. It's fun seeing just how long it takes Oscar to break.

The answer: he doesn't.

That much is made apparent when the trio, Max, and Charles go out for dinner and Lando decideds to test the limits.

Admittedly, he probably went to far. But in his defense Oscar was obviously not giving him any attention. He wasn't meaning to do what he did, it was an accident, and he apologized immediately, but Oscar never wavered. Barely batted an eye at him.

He left Lando with a smirk and a 'We'll sort this later.' They did and Lando was sore the next morning.

They fall into a rhythm. Pre-race kisses and post race cuddles.

Then Carlos shows up again.

~~~~~

She could tell by the radio that Oscar was disappointed with his race. His car had taken damage from Carlos and he'd lost position because of it.

He'd been keeping it off track until recently. Now he's getting more aggressive and frankly, it scares her.

Her and Lando are wary as they walk into his room in the McLaren hospitality. They enter without knocking but Oscar is laying on the ground with his arms open.

"I need a hug."

They oblige and fall onto the floor with him.

"Is it bad that I-"

"If you really need it then we can." She giggles, stopping him before he can get in his head to much.

"How'd you know?!"

"Mate, you're laying on the floor and these suits don't hide everything."

It's so different compared to Carlos. Oscar checks in every few minutes. Reminds them they can say no at any point. It's almost therapeutic, in a way.

They are all very naked and vulnerable at the moment. Which is horrible considering the door isn't locked. Which would normally be fine since it's a rule to knock before entering. In this case, however. It's awful because Carlos has just opened the door wide open.

She freezes; suddenly aware of every sound and feeling around her. Lando manhandles her body behind him and pulls something, a small throw blanket, to cover them. She feels guilty for not giving it to Oscar and leaving him to fend for himself.

Lando's breathing is labored. Her throat hurts from the last encounter they had. The memory burned into her. Her voice strains thinking about it as tears well in her eyes.

"You really couldn't knock? You just had towalk in on us to, as if you hadn't done enough already?"

"Glad to see nothings changed. They're still whores and eventually going to play you."

"Haven't done it yet mate. Personally, I think they are very loyal."

Oscar stand and puts his clothes back on. Almost like Carlos isn't even there.

"Also, for the record, if somebody looks at you with the fear they are, you've fucked up badly. Now if you'll excuse me I have two lovers I need to comfort."

Oscar slams the door on Carlos. Then he pulls clothes back onto both of them. More specifically, his clothes.

"Alright, I didn't want to ask before and figured you'd tell me what Carlos did on your own time. We are officially out of time. I promise to sit here and listen and you can take as much time as you need."

And they broke. Huddled all together and spilling every detail of what drove them this far. Oscar listened intently, validated feelings, and didn't judge. He tensed every occasionally at hearing what Carlos did, but aside from that, he tries not to show his anger.

"I'm going to make a call, alright?"

~~~~~

Max is angry. He's seeing Red and it's not just because Charles is two steps in front of him In a Ferrari shirt.

No, he's upset because Oscar called him and said his sister is crying. The Austrailian is going to have a fist to the face when he sees him. Which isn't long because they are outside of the hospitality building.

Max gets a grip of Oscar's shoulders and starts ranting. He's not even aware of half the stuff he's saying. He doesn't snap out of it until he feels Charles tap his shoulder and tell him his sister has been talking to him for the last few minutes.

Max is about to apoligize for misreading the situation. Then Carlos comes into Oscar's line of sight and the Dutch realizes that even he has a breaking point. A snapping point, more like.

Max is instantly grateful he's gripping Oscar's because the Australian is fighting to get a hold of Carlos. The Spainard is spewing vile thing directed at his sister and Lando.

It becomes a fight between Oscar trying to escape while Max and Charles keep him from doing something he can't take back.

"Oscar!" The pair comes to eye level with him. "He's not worth risking your career." He seems to come to his senses and relaxs. Max and Charles both ease away tentatively.

And Max regrets it instantly as Oscar walks right up to him, but lays not a finger on Carlos.

"Honestly Carlos, was it not enough to break them sexually? Physically? You also feel the need to humiliate them? How would the paddock feel if they knew what you truly are?" It's said just loud enough to elicit a few whispers.

Max and his Monegasque partner (who is also mad at Carlos still) bring the trio to their room and make sure they are okay. He hates leaving his sister like this, but he can rest easy knowing she's in good hands.

"Hey Max?"

"Yeah Charlie?"

"I guess it's the people who are the most patient who snap the hardest, huh?"

And Max couldn't have said it better himself. Maybe it's a good thing he's not patient...

[lumi-nescentt]

Max Verstappen seems like the type who would absolutely be jealous of his cats getting more attention than him, add in that his partner is allergic to cats, and she's still choosing to spend the few hours they have together when Max is home, cuddling with the cats instead of cuddling with Max.

There's just something sweet in my mind about a whining Max who's loosing to his cats, despite his girlfriend being all teared up and snotty because of her allergies, the cats are cute, and she has to cuddle them.

This is a mess of an ask, I apologise

Head On The Pillow, I Could Feel You Sneakin' In

Pairing: Max Verstappen x Reader

Warnings: none

Words: 1.6k

Summary: Max doesn't consider himself jealous. But he might start acting a little grumpy if he sees you choose his cats over him one more time.

A/N: Omg please don't apologise this was the cutest idea ever and after writing angsty stuff all week I was thrilled to have something sweet to think about :) I hope you like it as much as I enjoyed writing it hehe

Giving you a key to his apartment had seemed like the best idea for the two of you after dating for a few months. Max could tell you exactly when he was supposed to be back and he knew you’d be there waiting for him if you could. It was also good for when you missed him too much and wanted to either steal some of his clothes while he was gone or just stay at his place surrounded by so many things that screamed Max.

Normally, Max would have been over the moon to be with someone who was comfortable enough in his own home to spend time there with or without him but lately, Max seemed to notice a certain pattern. 

No matter when he called or texted, if you weren’t supposed to be working, you were always at his place. This first part wouldn’t have bothered him at all if it wasn’t for your cat allergies. It wasn’t as bad as it could have been but your eyes still got all red and puffy whenever you were around Jimmy and Sassy and you sneezed a lot. 

Max had tried to convince you countless times to stay away from them but you couldn’t resist them. They just had to be in the same room as you and you were already calling them over so Sassy could rest on your lap while Jimmy nuzzled against your side. If the cats realised you were allergic to them and tried to keep yourself from sneezing on them, they didn’t show it and gave you back as much love as they could. 

Part of Max was almost in awe to see you being this affectionate with his cats when they barely acknowledged him most of the time but he couldn’t help from wanting to be the one to receive all the attention. It had been fine during the summer break because you were spending all your time with him anyway but now that he was always gone, he really wanted to make the limited time he had with you count. 

As soon as the Qatar Grand Prix was over, all he wanted was to lay down with you in bed and not move for a few hours. He was exhausted, sweating all over and honestly driving in those conditions had been a nightmare. He really needed to complain about it, just to let it out, but with the media all around he wasn’t sure if his PR team would appreciate it so he kept his mouth shut, waiting to be all cuddled up in your arms to vent as you ran your hands through his hair like you usually did. 

When he landed in Nice a few hours later, Max had never been happier to have his own jet. All he could think about now was going back home to you, and his cats, but mostly you. He knew you’d be here because you told him so but he didn’t expect you to be in bed already, or to still be cuddling the cats instead of him when he lied down next to you.

-“ Schatje ?” he asked, only getting a sleepy groan as an answer “ Can you make them move please ? Jimmy’s claws are scratching my back and Sassy’s using half of my pillow…”

-“ They’re asleep Max, I don’t want to wake them but I can scoot away a bit and bring Jimmy with me a little if you want.” you answered with your eyes closed, your face resting against Sassy’s head while her back was on Max’ pillow

-“ I don’t want you to move away. I want him to move away and you to move closer.” he grumbled 

-“ I can’t do that without waking them up. I'm sorry baby, I promise we can cuddle all you want tomorrow. Is that okay with you ?” 

-“ Yeah I guess, good night schatje.” Max gave in, stretching over the cats to place a quick kiss on your cheek before settling down as best as he could against Sassy

When Max woke up the next day to a pillow all for himself, he wanted to make the most of this chance so he turned around, ready to drag your body closer to his but just like both cats had left him, you were no longer lying next to him. Groaning ever so slightly, Max got out of bed and started looking for where you had decided to go at 8am when he knew you had the day off. 

He quickly found you on the sofa with the cats laying all over you while you were clinging onto the box of tissues for dear life, trying not to sneeze and wake them up. 

-“ I didn’t think you’d wake up this soon Max, did I wake you ?” 

-“ No, I just missed you so I decided to get up.”

-“ I missed you too, baby.” you smiled at him warmly

-“ Did you really ?” 

-“ Yeah of course I did, we haven’t seen each other in 2 weeks. That’s a long time.” 

-“ It doesn’t quite seem like it…” Max complained with a pout

-“ What do you mean ?” you asked, confused as to why your boyfriend would be upset

-“ Since I came back all you did was cuddle with the cats and when I woke up and wanted to do the same like you promised, you were already gone...” 

-“ I’m sorry, they were hungry and I didn’t want their meowing to wake you up so we went to the kitchen and then I sat down for a second and Jimmy fell asleep on me so I couldn’t go back to you.”

-“ Just put him down on the sofa, he won’t even realise that you’re gone.” 

-“ Yes he will ! And then he’s going to think I don’t love him anymore and I don’t want him to think that.” 

-“ He’s a cat y/n.” 

-“ So ?”

-“ He’s not going to care that much as long as you keep feeding and petting him the rest of the time. However, your boyfriend who just came back from a very tiring race and wanted to be close to you might think you don’t want him anymore if you keep choosing his cats over him.” Max mumbled, crossing his arms as he eyed the two cats stealing your attention

-“ You don’t have to be jealous, okay ? There’s still room for you next to me, you know ?” you chuckled, patting the spot next to you

Max was going to sit down next to you when Sassy appeared from nowhere and jumped on the couch next to you, laying down where Max was planning on sitting. That was the final straw for your boyfriend and before you could realise what was happening, Max was taking Jimmy in his arms and putting him on the sofa before picking you up as you helplessly laughed and asked him to put you down. 

Max made his way to your bedroom, closing the door behind him before the cats could follow. Once he was sure it was only the two of you, he put you down with a satisfied huff.

-“ Are you satisfied now ?” you asked him with a grin

-“ Almost.” he said before handing you a tissue and heading towards the joint bathroom “ Here, take your allergy treatment then go shower because your eyes are all red and your arm is too. Once you’re done, I’ll be waiting on that promise you made and without the cats anywhere near you.” 

-“ But–”

-“ No ‘but’ schatje, I know you love them but I shouldn’t have to remind you that you’re allergic to them to get your full attention and to get you to put some distance between you.”

-“ They’re so cute, how am I supposed to not cuddle them when I need cuddles ?” 

-“ You have a boyfriend who’s perfectly able to do that too but since you seem to have forgotten, I’ve decided not to do anything all morning except reminding you that I’m way better than my own cats at this.” Max huffed, looking determined

When you came back from your shower, Max was waiting on a freshly made bed with two cups of coffee and a few pastries he had gone to pick up at the bakery downstairs. You sat on the bed for a while, eating your breakfast in front of a TV show you had just started together but as soon as you were done eating, Max was pulling you under the blanket and resting his head on your chest, tightening his arms around your waist.

-“ Isn’t this better than two fur balls that make your eyes itchy and your nose runny ?” Max asked, with his face buried against you

-“ It’s very nice, I have to admit.”

-“ I know but is it better than them ?” he insisted

-“ You’re really jealous, huh ?”

-“ Answer the question y/n.”

-“ Yes, this is way better Max.” 

-“ Good, I would have hated to have to sell my babies because they were stealing you away from me.” 

-“ You wouldn’t.” you exclaimed with a laugh

-“ I might if they keep you from me. I love them but I know I love you more, that’s for sure.” 

-“ You’re an idiot, I swear.” 

-“ I know, but I’m your idiot.” 

-“ That you are, now shush I want to watch this.” 

-“ Only if you promise me that I will come before the cats, always.” 

-“ Max.”

-“y/n.” he deadpanned, still waiting for you to comply

-“ I promise you come before the cats. You’re my favourite person, of course you come first.” 

-“ I love you.” Max smiled, placing a kiss on your stomach where he was now laying before adding “ Now shush, I actually want to watch this too.” 

-“ You’re insufferable.” you laughed, ruffling his hair slightly “I love you too dummy.”

[zepskies]

The Old-Fashioned Way

Pairing: Dean Winchester x F. Reader

Summary: You and Dean are having trouble trying to start a family. What happens when you turn to a spell for a possible solution? [Soulmate AU]

AN: Happy Valentine's Day! ❣️ Welcome back to the Never Say Goodbye-verse, my first ever Soulmate AU! Feels appropriate to celebrate today with some soulmates lol.

Honestly, I have really missed these two. I can’t believe it’s almost been a year since I wrote this series! And I’ve been wanting to find a way to come back to it, so when I recently got this request, I couldn't resist:

The reader finds out she is pregnant and Dean’s reaction.

But of course, I couldn’t make it that simple… This story takes place five years after the Bonus Tracks (3-part sequel).

Word Count: 5,000

Tags/Warnings: Established relationship (marriage). Soulmates, angst, issues in pregnancy, hurt/comfort, fluff, implied smut.

❤️ Series Masterlist

Today marked five years that Dean had been an officer of the Sioux Falls Police Department.

After twenty-eight odd years of committing felonies of varying degrees…mostly for the greater good, he still found it strange sometimes.

He’d been partnered with his father-in-law, Jack, and by now, Dean had finally lost his sense of “imposter syndrome.”

Jody bought him a pie to commemorate the occasion, and while a little embarrassed, he wasn’t mad about it. The precinct employees now shared the dessert on paper plates from their respective desks and cubicles.

Dean sat in the bullpen with Jack (who was on a call), Jody, and even Jessie Deluca, the boy he’d once arrested for stealing candy and groceries from a gas station.

Well, Jessie wasn’t such a kid anymore. He was now their 18-year-old intern.

“How’s the boysenberry?” Jody asked Dean. Her lips curved upward when he turned to her with a crumb-covered smile. 

“Real good,” he said.

She couldn’t help but laugh a little. “I can’t with this. Come ‘ere.”

She grabbed a napkin and leaned over to wipe at his mouth the way a mother would her errant child. Dean just rolled his eyes.

“Really?” he snipped.

“You look like my five-year-old son after a round of SpaghettiOs,” she said.

“Makes you wonder how his wife deals with him,” Jessie muttered under his breath while he entered expense reports into his computer. Never mind that he had a purple berry stain around the corner of his mouth.

Dean shot him a wry look, along with his crumpled napkin.

“I don’t wanna hear that from a punk like you,” he teased. “You haven’t had a girlfriend since…what, junior prom?”

Jessie fended off the stained napkin with a grimace. But he also smarted at the dig. His arms crossed defensively as he leaned back in his chair.

“As a matter a fact, I’ve got a date on Friday,” he sniffed. “And no, I’m not telling you her name.”

Dean and Jody shared an amused look.

“Aww, look at him, pretending he’s got a date,” Dean said. He fought a deeper grin when Jessie threw the disgusting napkin back at him.

“Fine! Her name’s Annie. You happy now?” Jessie said.

Dean shared another look with Jody.

“Aww, he’s actually got a date,” said Dean. He smirked at the kid next. “Lemme know if you need to borrow some cologne. Chicks dig that.”

“Ugh,” Jessie groaned. He leaned his elbows on his desk and pushed the palms of his hands into his eyes. He knew he’d be catching flack on this for the rest of the week.

Dean chuckled, but before he had a chance to tease their intern some more, his cell phone rang. It was you, and he felt his good mood continue as he answered.

“Hey, baby.”

“Hey, how’s the day going?” you asked.

“Good,” he replied. “We’re on lunch break. Jody got me a pie for my five-year mark at the PD.”

“Aw, that’s so sweet…literally. She knows you too well,” you laughed.

He nodded in agreement. “Yeah, she really does.”

“Tell her and everyone else I said hi.”

“Will do,” he said with a smile. “You just callin’ to check up on me?”

“Well, that, and…when are you getting home tonight?” you asked. The smooth, leading note of your voice had Dean’s lips curving into a smirk.

“Ah, well…” He pushed away from his desk and stepped away from the bullpen for a little privacy in the hall. “That depends. What’s going on?”

“Let’s just say…I have an idea,” you replied. It had Dean’s brows raising. You’d been having a lot of ideas for the past year, and he’d been more than ready and willing for most of them.

“Oh, yeah?” he intoned. While he leaned against the wall in the main hallway of the precinct, his arm crossed under his elbow as he continued holding the phone to his ear. “What’d you have in mind?”

“You’ll just have to find out,” you said.

It only took his brain about a moment and a half to compute.

“All right. In that case, I’ll try to be home promptly at six, barring there’s no shootouts at the 7-Eleven,” he quipped.

“Ugh, please, don’t even joke about that,” you said, your tone sobering.

Dean realized, without even having to read his soulmate’s thoughts, that you were reminded of the last time an explosive incident happened at the local gas station, just two weeks before their wedding day. He dimmed as well. 

“Yeah, ‘m sorry,” he said, swiping a hand over his mouth. “Uh…okay. I’ll see you tonight, sweetheart.”

“Okay, be careful,” you said. You always said it—in the morning, whenever he left for work, whenever you two managed to talk during the day. It was routine, but it also wasn’t. 

And you still wished him a good rest of his day before you hung up. Dean pocketed his phone and returned to the bullpen, where Jody was putting away the rest of the pie. He eyed her just to know exactly where she was setting it down in the kitchen, for future reference.

Jessie peered up from his computer and asked if that was you on the phone.

“Yeah, she says hi,” Dean replied.

Jessie smirked. “‘Course she does. I’m her favorite.”

Dean shot him a look, knowing the kid liked you probably even more than he liked Dean. You’d become like a big sister to Jessie…but it didn’t stop Dean from occasionally being annoyed. 

“Shut up and eat your pie.”

Dean arrived that night, more or less on time, to find that you’d cooked up a feast. It was laid out across the dining table: steak, scalloped potatoes, carrots and broccoli, and even freshly baked cornbread with butter. 

“Is it my birthday again?” he asked, despite it already being February. 

He ventured into the kitchen where you were getting two bottles of beer. You looked up at him with a smile when he came over and held you from behind. You enjoyed the warmth of his body pressed against your back, while his hands found your hips.

“I cook all the time, Dean,” you pointed out. He pressed a kiss to the side of your head in greeting.

“Hmm. Yeah, but now my spidey senses are tingling,” he said.

You set down the beer before turning in his embrace and twining your arms around his neck. Already he could feel your anticipation through the soul bond, but that was all you were letting him sense. You were keeping your walls up a bit, to stop him from hearing your thoughts. In this case, it felt like a tease.

You tilted your head, a smile playing across your lips. “Oh, yeah?”

Dean smirked down at you. “Oh, yeah.”

You laughed and let him greet you properly with a kiss. You returned it, affectionately caressing his cheek, but you stopped him before he could start pressing you harder into the counter. You held up a placating hand against his chest.

“Wait, wait, the food’s gonna get cold,” you said. And all too quickly, you’d extricated yourself from his arms and went to finish placing the silverware on the table. Dean begrudgingly followed suit by helping you with the glasses and plates.

Dinner was delicious. He couldn’t remember the last time he’d had a steak that good; you two had been scrounging and saving to get out of this apartment and buy a house, along with other things you and Dean had been planning for your future.

By the time the leftovers were put away and the dishes were put in the dishwasher, he started to sense that you were ready to come around with the real reason you’d called him at work today, let alone made such a nice and expensive meal. You went over to where he stood at the kitchen sink and rubbed his arm.

“Hey,” you greeted.

Dean tried to stifle his knowing smile. “Yeah?”

But when he looked over at you, he realized you seemed nervous, not flirtatious. You were serious, and now, he was concerned.

“What?” he asked.

You sighed, hesitating for a moment. Then you went over to a nearby drawer and got some rubber gloves you always kept at work and at home—the kind doctors wore.

You went for your large work bag that normally stored your laptop and files, and instead, you pulled out an old book. Dean’s brows raised of their own accord, considering the last time you accidentally trifled with a book like that.

“What the hell is that?” he asked, with some trepidation. You laid the book out on the kitchen counter.

“It’s a journal of some kind, written in Latin, dating back from the late 1500s. Can you believe that?” Your head raised from where you were examining the cover and spine, but Dean was incredulous.

“What’re you doing with that?” he asked. Your lips pursed, and he felt a tendril of your guilt.

Most likely, you’d taken it from the museum where you worked without permission. You were in charge of the growing library of ancient texts that were stored there, and most of them were too old and valuable for exhibition, even behind glass. He doubted you were even allowed to open this book, let alone “borrow” it from the museum.

You sighed and held up a placating hand. “Okay, Dean, just hear me out.”

You opened the book to a page you’d placed a strip of paper in for bookmarking purposes. You pointed at a page filled with scrawled words that Dean didn’t really understand. Sam was always better at reading Latin.

“That is a fertility spell,” you said.

The weight of that fell between you for a moment, rendering Dean speechless. It took a few seconds for his brain to register what you were saying, followed quickly by a sad, contemplative frown as he stared back at you. You were serious about this, even hopeful. 

“Sweetheart, we don’t need that,” he said, shaking his head. Your expression firmed, though it became touched with melancholy.

“It’s been a year, Dean,” you said. “We’ve been trying for a year, and I’m still not pregnant.”

He blew out a breath. “The doctor said—”

“We’ve done everything the doctor said,” you snapped. “Fertility treatments are either going to take too long or are too expensive, and they still carry risks.”

“And this isn’t a risk?” Dean shot back, gesturing at the book. “You don’t know if this will work, or what the hell it’ll really do to you.”

Your brows furrowed, but you didn’t back down. You held your hands to your hips.

“Uncle Bobby said it’s legit,” you said. Dean blinked in surprise. He shifted back on his heels and crossed his arms.

“You ran this by Bobby before me?” he said. You could feel the small lance of his upset, as well as see it across his face.

You bit the inside of your lip. “I just wanted to make sure!”

Dean took in a deep breath. He mentally counted to five.

“What exactly did he say?” he asked.

You paused at that. “…Well, he said it was a real spell.”

His brows rose. “And?”

“And…that magic is unpredictable and we should talk about it first. But that’s why we’re talking now!” you reasoned. 

Your husband’s gaze lifted heavenward as he threw up his hands in aggravation.

“Dean—” you tried, but it didn’t stop him from snatching up the book. Despite your protests, he took it with him into the master bedroom you shared and shoved the book into his nightstand. You had followed him this far, but you stopped short when he turned around to face you.

“I will check this out,” he said, and his tone boded no argument. “But for the record, I’m against this. Magic is unpredictable at best, and not for nothing, it always comes at a price. I’ll be damned if you’re gonna pay it again.”

You paused. Hearing the vehemence in his tone, feeling the force of emotion behind his words, and your own circling memories of being possessed by a magic-wielding goddess…it had you nodding in agreement, even as tears welled up in your eyes.

Dean faltered a little inside. Always the damn tears. He gathered you into his arms and held you close in comfort. He pressed a kiss to your forehead.

“We’ll figure this out. I promise,” he said.

You tried to believe him.

Late that night, however, you couldn’t help yourself.

Once you were sure Dean was asleep beside you, hearing his deep, even breaths, you made your move. Dressed in just an old college shirt and some pajama shorts, you slid out of bed and tiptoed over to his nightstand to get the book.

You took it into the kitchen and started assembling the ingredients Bobby had reluctantly helped you translate. (He didn’t know that you had taken a couple of items from his house for the spell.) 

You prepared them in a bowl. The resulting liquid looked brown and disgusting. You mixed it around, grimacing at the smell, and carefully poured it into a glass. The last thing the spell required was a few drops of your blood, and then you were supposed to drink it. 

God, this is terrible, you thought. Part of you couldn’t believe you were going through with this, but…you grabbed a kitchen knife in order to make a shallow cut on your palm. 

The steel was poised against your hand. You took a fortifying breath, but before you could cut into your skin, Dean grabbed your wrist with a strong grip, startling a gasp out of you.

“What the hell are you doing?!” he said, or more like shouted. He was irate, his voice bounding off the walls of the apartment.

You knew he had every right to be, and you didn’t have a good answer for him. Shock had stifled you into silence.

Dean let go of you and took the glass next. He peered in disgust at the concoction inside, but he quickly dumped it into the sink and ignored your protests. He threatened to burn the damn book next.

“Dean, stop! Please,” you said tearfully as you stilled his hands on the book. “If there’s some kind of price to the spell, I’ll pay it!”

“What’re you talking about! Are you crazy?” he asked, through furrowed brows. You squeezed his hands.

“Believe me, I love what we have. I love our life, my job, all of it,” you said. “But I want a family, and I want it with you.”

Dean started to soften at that, when you met his eyes. You paused, taking in a shaky breath.

“It should be simple, but it’s not," you said. "I just can’t understand why it’s so impossible. Why…why there’s something wrong with me.”

Dean’s anger broke down, bit by bit the more you spoke. He let go of the book and reached for you. He held you against his chest, rubbing your back as you quietly wept. You tried to stifle it, but that just made your body tremble even more. He did his best to steady you, rocking you back and forth. His eyes closed for a moment.

You both knew that the expensive fertility doctor hadn’t found anything wrong with either of you, even after a month of testing.

“In certain cases, it just takes longer for some couples,” she’d said. But clearly, you had just been blaming yourself. Dean couldn’t abide that.

“There’s nothing wrong with you,” he said firmly. “Believe me, I want that too. But I also want to make sure you’re safe.”

Emotion clogged in his throat when he thought about what might’ve happened if he hadn’t stopped you. And in turn, you sobered even more when you managed to pick up on his thoughts.

“If something would’ve happened, and I was too late to stop it,” he said, clearing his throat. “…I just can’t, okay?”

After a moment, you nodded. You allowed yourself to rest against his chest and try to calm the racing of your heart. All the while, you tried your best not to resent him for stopping you.

The next day was a Saturday. You slept in because your body needed it, after the stress of last night. When you woke up, Dean wasn’t beside you. His keys and the Impala were gone, but he’d left you a text: he’d gone to your uncle Bobby’s place. 

And you saw that he’d taken the book as well. Predictable. 

You felt bad for how you tried to go behind your husband’s back, but if you were honest with yourself, you were still upset at him for stopping you, even if you understood why he did it. 

You sat on the edge of your bed. Not for the first time since you and Dean were separated by miles of roads and his family’s mission to find the thing that killed his mother, you found yourself praying. 

Please, God…or if there’s even anyone up there…please help me.

For a while, there was silence in the room. 

But even if your eyes were open, you wouldn’t have seen the being that was standing in front of you. He stared down at you with a tilted head, finding himself a bit too curious. Hesitantly, he reached his hand out and touched your forehead. 

You didn’t completely register the feeling that washed over you. It was like the tingling of a breeze across your skin. You took it for a chill in the room as you shivered a little. Then you opened your eyes, and resigned yourself to starting your day. 

Castiel left the room with but a thought and a flutter of wings. 

He knew he was only supposed to observe Michael’s vessel, not his soulmate. And yet, with one touch, he had sensed the rare genetic defect your doctor had missed.

Your mother had unknowingly suffered the condition as well. Your father never told you this, but she’d nearly lost you in the early stages of her pregnancy. It had been a miracle that you were born at all. 

Castiel fixed the problem. 

He knew what Uriel, or even Naomi would say. Perhaps they didn’t need to know, in this case. They were both far too busy for worldly trifles. Even so, Castiel knew he wasn’t authorized to heal you.

Still, it felt…right. And so, he did it. 

It confused him.

…Maybe it isn’t something to be closely examined, he thought.

With that agreement within himself, he resolved to leave that decision behind him, and continue watching from afar. Those were his orders, after all.

Visiting Bobby Singer wasn’t as productive as Dean wanted it to be. The men had been arguing in Bobby’s living room for close to an hour.

Dean was upset with him for translating that goddamn spell for you, but the old man didn’t have a good answer. They both knew you were like a daughter to him.

“She came in hot, all damn stubborn and sass up to here,” Bobby said, holding a hand up to his forehead. “But you try sayin’ no when the waterworks starts.”

…Dean could concede that, but he rubbed his face in frustration. 

“What do I do here, Bobby?” he asked, holding up the spell book in question. Apparently, it was more like a journal; it was rumored to have belonged to a sixteenth-century witch named Rowena. “I don’t trust this thing. Deep in my gut, I know it.”

Bobby considered him for a moment. In fact, he gave Dean a long-suffering look that made him really see Bobby’s age. 

“Then trust your gut, son,” was all he said. 

Dean returned home with a peace offering: some apple crumble pie. You were lying on the sofa watching mindless TV, still in your pajamas. Your mental walls were down, so Dean could both see and feel how miserable you were. 

He took out the pie from the small bag of groceries he carried and held it up so you could see.

“I come bearing sugar,” he said. He also set down a bottle of wine on the dining table. You were focused on the pie, however.

“Who’s that for, me or you?” you dryly remarked. 

“I got ice cream too,” he said, shaking the grocery bag. 

You smiled a little, but he could feel through the bond that you were still sour at him. He sighed and went over to you. He set down the bribery on the coffee table and settled a hand on your pajama-clad thigh. 

“Sweetheart, I am sorry.” 

Sighing, you turned off the TV and sat up against the other end of the couch. You eyed him with a frown.

“You’re not sorry about chucking the spell,” you accused. Or for stealing the book you’d eventually have to bring back to work, lest your boss notice something amiss in the inventory.

“No, I’m not,” said Dean. “It was dangerous. I felt it. And that gut feeling? That’s what’s saved me more times than I can damn count.” 

You were still upset, you couldn’t deny…but you understood his point. When he beckoned you over, you were more willing to go to him. After you scooted closer, he wrapped an arm around your waist and pressed a kiss to the top of your head.

“Look, I’ll go to whatever doctors you want, try whatever treatments, however long it takes,” he said.

You sighed, but you eventually agreed with a teary nod. “Okay. Thank you.”

Even with that, Dean wasn’t convinced that he was getting through to you. He was picking up on a thread of hopelessness that you were trying to hide.

He’d just have to change that.

“But…” He earned your attention by squeezing your side. His lips formed a grin. “I still think we can do this the old-fashioned way.”

He slowly rubbed a hand up and down your back. With the other hand, he reached for your face, tracing your lower lip with his thumb. You smiled slightly at his teasing. Part of you wanted to heed the suggestion in his eyes, and the familiar warmth and promise in his touch. The other, more vulnerable part of you hesitated.

When you caught sight of something over his shoulder, you had to smile a little more.

“I see you got a bottle of Merlot,” you said. A notable upgrade from beer. You couldn’t remember the last time Dean had willingly bought some “bougie-ass” wine.

“A little pie, a little booze…” you noted.

Dean grinned. “I’m thinking we have a not-so-quiet night in.”

Your brows rose, and you hummed in surprise. “Is my husband trying to butter me up?”

“Nah,” he said, tilting your face back up to his. “Your husband’s trying to seduce you.”  

You giggled at that…at first. But it seemed he was serious.

You accepted his passionate kiss. Closing your eyes, you reached blindly for his shirt and held on while his lips moved ardently against yours. Through the bond, you felt his desire like it was your own.

In the five years you’d been married, and the years you were together even before, there were often moments where it was impossible to discern what was him and what was you. 

The beautiful thing about it was, that part didn’t matter too much. Especially not when you and Dean became a tangle of limbs, lips, and tongue on the couch. He ridded you of your threadbare pajamas, and you helped him halfway out of his shirt and jeans before he yanked the rest of it off himself.

And all while he drew lusty moans and sighs and pleasure from your body in the comfort of your living room, the ice cream slowly melted in its container on the coffee table—completely forgotten, along with the pie.

That night, you lied awake in his arms for a while. Round one on the couch had migrated to rounds two and three in the bedroom, and you were almost too exhausted to sleep. 

It had been months since you and Dean had sex without thinking of calendars and timing, optimal positions and ovulation.

This felt right, you thought, as you stroked his arm that was wrapped around your waist. Even though your skin was sticking to his under the sheets and your frizzy hair was probably tickling his neck, he didn’t seem to mind.

Dean? you tried through the bond, seeing if he was awake. He felt like he was still in-between wakefulness and sleep. At your prodding though, he slipped back into the former. 

“Hmm?” he replied. You let out a sigh in the dark. 

“I’m sorry I kind of tried to take matters into my own hands, with the spell.”

He hmphed in response. “Kinda?”

Your lips twitched upwards. 

“This is a ‘together’ thing,” you said. “I made it all about me.”

Dean shook his head at that. He responded through the bond. No, you didn’t.

I did, you insisted. You were right to stop me. I didn’t care about the consequences…but that’s not fair to you. To either of us.

He took that in with a deep sigh of his own.

“It’s okay. We want the same thing,” he said. “And we’ll get there, baby. Don’t you worry.”

“What makes you so sure?” you asked.

“…I don’t know. I just am.”

You closed your eyes, and once again, you tried to believe him. You let his heartbeat and the sound of his steady breathing lull you to sleep. 

Nine weeks later…

You were alone in the bathroom at seven in the morning. After almost a month late on your period, you were also staring at two positive lines on your last pregnancy test. 

Ho…ly…shit.

Dean was already at work. This wasn’t something you wanted to tell him over the phone, however. 

How the hell am I supposed to keep this from him all day? you thought.

But then again, maybe this was a good thing. You had time to make sure.

So you called out of work for a personal day, and you immediately called your doctor on your way out to the closest pharmacy. You were going to need a few more tests. 

When Dean eventually got home that evening, there were two pizzas waiting for him. The smell was already making his mouth water. He peeked under the hood of each box and rubbed his hands together. 

“Ooh, awesome.” Pepperoni, sausage, and double cheese. His favorite.

You appeared then from the kitchen with a strange smile on your face. 

“Hey!” you chirped, but you seemed a bit distracted as you pulled out a sheet pan of cookies from the oven. You nearly dropped them when the corner of the pan banged against the oven. 

Something was off with you. Dean knew it intuitively. He went over and tried to steady you with a hand on the small of your back. He could see that you were frazzled, but he realized, with a frown, that you had your walls up again. He couldn’t pick up on what you were thinking.

“You okay?” he asked. “What’s going on?”

“Uh…well, something,” you nodded and wiped your hands after you peeled the oven mitts off. “And I need to tell you about it before I bake everything in the house, including the expired bran muffins.”

Dean was growing more concerned by the moment. He knew for a fact he’d hidden that bran muffin mix deep in the pantry, so you wouldn’t force him to eat a “healthy dessert.”

“Okay, what?” he asked.

You paused, steeling yourself with a breath.

You then took his hand and led him to the bedroom, into the adjoining bathroom. Across the entire counter were no less than seven pregnancy tests. 

All positive.

Dean’s breath caught in his lungs. Slowly he turned back to you with his widened eyes.

“Surprise?” you smiled, a little nervously. 

Dean grasped the counter and had to sit down hard on the closed toilet seat. 

“Yeah, I did that too,” you said. You couldn’t help but giggle as you caressed his face. He grabbed your hip, both to bring you closer and for added stability. You two had been trying to make this happen for over a year, but the gravity of this being real was finally hitting him. 

He stared up at your face with a growing smile. “This is happening.” 

You nodded, smiling through your burgeoning tears. 

“Yeah. It is,” you replied. “Dean, you’re gonna be a dad.”

That realization had him nodding, swallowing hard and blinking past a sting in his eyes. 

He wrapped his arms around your waist, bringing you in between his knees. You threaded your fingers through his hair, and his head came to rest against your stomach. He pressed a kiss there, over your shirt. 

After a moment to gather himself, he rocked back onto his feet. Then he enveloped you in a secure and warm embrace. He kissed the side of your head, and you felt his smile there.

“We did it, baby,” he said.  

“And that was the easy part,” you quipped, making him laugh. Yet the holy shit of it all hit him in a new wave—one you felt through the bond. You had to take a deep breath to steady yourself as well.

“Oh my God, this is happening,” he repeated.

You uttered a tearful laugh. “Uh, yeah, Dean.”

He was still smiling, but it started to dim a little. 

“We’re ready, right?” he asked.

You chuckled, wiping at your eyes. “We better be.”

Dean nodded and pulled back enough to see your face. You met his gaze. Maybe you’d just had more time than him to process it all, but you finally felt a sense of peace.

“Together, right?” he said.

“Yeah,” you smiled. “Together.”

Dean let out a deep breath. “Shit, I gotta tell Sam.”

Your smile brightened and you squeezed his arms.

“Let’s call him!" you said. "Hopefully Eileen’s there too.”

The two had moved in together a couple of years ago, after Eileen officially retired from hunting. But she often had long shifts at her job, just like Sam did at the law firm he started working for after he graduated from law school, near the top of his class.  

While you and Dean went into the bedroom to call Sam together, an angel watched from a distance, unseen by human eyes.

He found himself smiling.

AN: Ahh I'm soft. 🥰 I hope you all enjoy this as much as I had fun diving back into Never Say Goodbye.

And I won't say that I'll never come back to it in the future...for obvious reasons. 😉

Series Masterlist

Dean Winchester Series List

Dean Winchester Masterlist

Series + Dean Tag List (Part 1):

I did my best to get everyone who was tagged in the original run of the series first, then my normal Dean tag list.

@curlycarley @chubby-teddybear @jamerlynn @iprobablyshipit91 @globetrotter28 @deamus-liv @deans-spinster-witch @my-proof-is-you @vera0124 @deans-baby-momma @lacilou @samanddeaninatrenchcoat @theonlymaninthesky @spnexploration @itzabbyxx @cevans-winchester @imagineteller1

@icequeen1371 @tiredqueen73 @bitchwitch1981 @abbigaleelizabeth @ohgodthebogisback @where-the-river-bends @loveprof6 @shadowcrowsworld @thespnlover @this-is-me19 @stevenknightmarc @leigh70 @syrma-sensei @brain-has-left

@hobby27 @ashbatz @saranghaey @jori21 @lillyrob @adoringanakin @agirlwithdemonblood @mimaria420 @nephil-with-a-gun @writethrough @iamsapphine @definitelymentallyderanged @kazsrm67 @letheatheodore @agothwithheavysetmakeup @jacklesbrainworms @foxyjwls007 @wincastifer

[urgonnaneedabiggership]

Perfume Regret

ExBoyfriend!Miguel O'Hara x FemReader

Summary: A fic inspired by Attention by Charlie Puth. Your ex-boyfriend Miguel O'Hara left you heartbroken and no matter how intense the effect he has on you still is, you're determined to use this party to get even.

Warnings: +18 meaning SMUT AND LANGUAGE MINORS DNI OR SO HELP ME GOD. Also there's angst and good old anger-fueled sex. The ending isn't heartbreaking don't worry.

Word count: 4K

I know that dress is karma 

Perfume regret 

Got me thinking 'bout when you were mine 

Nightclubs had never been your scene. 

While you weren't strictly averse to them, you didn't thrive in that element as much as some of your friends did. Yet, whenever you decided to make an appearance, it wasn't the stroboscopic lights, the promise of a few drinks with friends, or the energizing music that made the night worth it. 

It was the hunt. 

And the preparations began long before you even set foot out of your apartment, from the moment you stood in front of the mirror wearing nothing but a fluffy bathrobe, your face a blank canvas. Getting ready with your favorite, emboldening playlist was usually a luxury but not tonight. Judging by the way you struggled to apply eyeliner over your lids with such shaky hands, tonight, you were in dire need of a crushing amount of confidence. 

So much so that a glass with one remaining sip of red wine stood next to your makeup bag, waiting for you to take that last bit of liquid courage. 

Yes, the mere thought of the chase always made your chest swell with excitement. The stolen glances from across the dancefloor until someone gave in and tried to make contact. Loud music left people no choice but to hold conversations in loud whispers that tickled your ear. The desperate attempts to make themselves worthy of your time and the small concessions you made to make them feel like the most special person in that tiny, packed, overpriced club. Flirting was a tango meant for two, and not knowing what kind of partner you'd be dancing with was exhilarating. 

Not this time, however, you thought as you picked up the glass and poured the remaining wine down your throat. Tonight you were after a much too familiar prey that you'd once been dumb enough to let get away. 

As soon as you got the digital invitation to the Alchemax Innovation Department New Year's Eve party, you knew it was time to settle the score. 

A short buzz coming from your phone interrupted your train of thought as the screen lit up with a text from whom you considered to be your work best friend, Liz. 

Heyy :) u coming? 

Yep. Be there in 20, is everybody there already?

O'Hara is missing. Idk if he's coming, though. 

Oh. 

You felt your stomach drop at the thought of all of this being for nothing. Whatever,. Who cared? You weren't doing this for him. You were doing it for yourself because you wanted to go out and have fun. 

A weak smile tugged at your lips when you couldn't even convince yourself with that blatant lie. God, you felt like a terrible feminist at the moment. Screw you, Miguel O'Hara. 

Those had been the last words you said to him before marching out of his apartment and slamming the door after you. Ever since that week during which he’d vanished from work with no explanation, your boyfriend had started to cancel your dates at the last minute or still be out at odd hours, and when he started to simply disappear and not answer your calls or texts several times throughout the day you began to worry.

When he asked if you could talk about something important, you figured you'd be getting an explanation, not dumped. 

The reason, according to him? He was dealing with some personal issues that he could not tell you about, but he'd single-handedly decided it was in your best interest to just move on with your life, so he'd decided to break things off. His face when he said all of that remained engraved in your brain since that day. Cold. Logical. As devoid of any visceral emotion as a doctor would be when recommending you to give up carbs or red meat. 

Two years of your life you'd given to him. You were planning to move in together. You were happy. For what felt like the very first time in your life, you were in love. 

You took a deep breath to keep tears from running down your cheeks and ruining your mascara. 

Even almost six months later, your heart painfully fluttered at the mention of his name.

Carefully, you dried your eyes with a piece of paper and took another deep, slow breath. Your eyes, beautifully framed by a smoky eyeshadow, slowly traced the reflection of your body in the mirror. A sleek, simple dress with a small slit on the side hugged your figure. You loved the color: a nearly black navy blue that matched your chosen makeup palette. 

At the sound of your phone, your eyes drifted down to the lit-up screen. 

Oh, nvm, he just got here. 

The game was afoot. 

As much as it hurt your pride to admit it, you were decidedly nervous as you made your way into the dimly lit nightclub, your eyes discreetly scanning the crowd in search of a particular set of brown eyes. 

Suddenly, a voice made your face in the opposite direction. 

"(Y/N)! Over here!" Liz called from the bar, waving at you with a huge smile that you returned as you walked towards her after wistfully looking at the busy crowd one last time. It wasn't until you reached the bar that you noticed she was sitting next to a man you didn't recognize. 

"So, this is she," she nearly yelled right next to the man's ear when you got close enough to be heard above the deafening electronic beats. 

"Hi, (Y/N), right?" He said, reaching out one hand, "I'm David. Liz has told me a lot about you," 

"Dave here just joined the team," Liz explained, giving his arm a gentle squeeze, "I thought it would be nice to make him feel welcomed. I'll leave you to it. I have to go say hi to a few people," She continued as she left the bar, not before giving you a certain look that made you realize you'd walked straight into a trap. While David was decidedly handsome, and you could've considered him to be your type under different circumstances, right then, your mind was somewhere else. 

"Sure," You replied distractedly, "So why did you choose to work here?" 

That should be enough to keep him talking for a while about his college education and how all he'd ever wanted to do was work for this company and so on while you focused on the matter at hand. 

Where the hell was he? 

Could it be that he'd just popped in to greet a few people and had left before you arrived? Before the countdown? 

Maybe he was celebrating New Year's with somebody else? 

"Sorry, one shot of tequila, please," You loudly called as the bartender walked past you. 

"Make that two, thanks man," David added with a flirtatious smile that you returned out of politeness, mentally praying for Liz to come back soon, knowing damn well that if she'd done this on purpose, there'd be no way out of this conversation. 

You downed the shot as soon as it was placed in front of you. 

David asked you something, but his voice reached your ears as if he was underwater. For a minute, you wondered if such a small amount of alcohol could make you feel so dizzy until you realized it was something else. Your eyes had landed on the back of a familiar head. Brown, scruffy hair and a hearty laugh that had your hands shaking again as you placed the glass back on the wooden bar. 

"God, I'm so sorry. My head's all over the place right now. You were saying?" You said, leaning closer to David. 

"I asked if Alchemax tends to go easy on the new guys or kick them to the curb at the first mistake." 

You laughed as if he'd just told an amazing joke, your eyes covertly going from his face to your target right behind him. At the sound of your laugh, his back stiffened, and you could see he was about to turn around. Right before he did, you quickly tore your eyes off him and glued them to David's face. 

"Oh, don't worry, you'll be just fine. I'll tell you what, I'll look out for you. How's that sound?” You replied, a more relaxed smile plastered on your face. David's eyes lit up. Poor guy. He probably thought that out of nowhere, his luck had shifted. 

Slowly and without losing the amused grin, you peeked over David's shoulder and found Miguel O'Hara's searing eyes staring right into yours. Unlike you, he wasn't smiling. Instead, he let those same calculating eyes unashamedly scrutinize every inch of your body that your gorgeous dress didn't cover and secretly fantasize about what it did. 

Another loud laughter leaving your lips made him snap out of a trance-like state and look into your eyes. Hunting on grounds you were no stranger to had its advantages, such as knowing what to do and when. And so you didn't look away. You held his gaze, undaunted, as you took David's unfinished tequila and brought it up to your lips to take a sip, barely sticking out your tongue to slowly lick the last droplets off your lower lip. You mouthed an apology to the man before you as you walked away from the bar, both for the stolen tequila and for what was about to happen. 

Trying your hardest not to smile or look at him, you made your way through the crowd straight toward Miguel, whose eyes you knew had remained with you since that intense visual exchange back at the bar. You felt them so intensely that you wondered if he could make you burst out in flames just by looking at you. You clenched your jaw as you got close enough for the scent of his enticing cedarwood cologne to fill your nostrils and travel all the way down to your chest, where your heart beat so strongly that it physically hurted. 

You only had one shot. This was it. 

It wasn't until you walked right past him that you finally acknowledged him, gifting him a faint smile as you stepped around him and walked toward the restrooms. 

As soon as the door closed after you, you found the two stalls were empty. After confirming you were alone, a nervous grin took over your features. Biting your lip, you approached the mirror and distractedly began to comb your hair back in place and even retouched your nude lipstick, your eyes set on the reflection of the bathroom door. 

Almost as if you'd timed it, the second you finished applying your makeup and threw it back into your purse, Miguel stealthily slid inside and shut the door after him. 

A minute that felt like an eternity to him transcurred while you kept patiently tucking strands of hair behind your ears, concealing a smug grin. Something had to give. More often, sooner than later. 

"Mind telling me what the fuck was that?" 

His voice bounced off the walls and reached your ears like a once-favorite song you hadn't heard in months. 

"What do you mean?" You calmly asked, never interrupting your task. 

"(Y/N), stop that and look at me." He commanded, his patience wearing thinner by the second. 

"I am looking at you," You nonchalantly replied, your eyes transfixed on his tense shape in the corner of the mirror as you slowly wiped some smudged lipstick off the edge of your bottom lip. 

Outside, the one-minute countdown began. Neither of you could care less. Inside that dimly lit, empty nightclub bathroom, time was irrelevant. 

In less than five steps, Miguel reached your side and, placing his hands on your shoulders, firmly spun you around to face him. 

"Carajo, ¿Tú no entiendes, verdad?" He hissed, his next leaving his mouth after an ominous pause, "Now look at me."

Not happy with the way you were being handled, you shoved him away and shot him a glare with your arms folded before you. 

"There, I'm looking. What do you want?" 

"I want you to tell me who's that asshole and why you seem to think he's so damn funny," 

"I'm sorry, O'Hara, that's none of your business anymore, is it?" You spat out.

"It was none of my business,' He agreed, wincing at the dry use of his last name, "Until you showed up in here looking like that, laughing like a dumb teen at some guy's dumb jokes, making sure I'm watching after you did some pretty extensive research to make sure I was coming."

Wanting to rebuke that argument, you immediately opened your mouth just for him to interrupt you. 

"What? You thought I wouldn't find out, bonita?" 

Miguel started to move towards you without giving you a chance to explain yourself. Still, you weren't sure of what you would've said had you been given the time. Three seconds later, he was standing right before you, trapping you against the cold stone of the sinks.

"Why are you doing this?" He absentmindedly asked, as if he was actually questioning himself or already knew the answer. Before you could react, he suddenly leaned in, burying his face in your neck and taking a deep breath, taking in the scent of your perfume along with something else that you couldn’t perceive but seemed to pull him forward so violently that he had to use both his strong arms on either side of you to hold himself back. Still, he kept babbling against the soft skin of your neck, “I didn’t want to do it…I didn’t…I shouldn’t have…mi amor, I just wanted to protect you,” 

“Protect me from what?” You asked in a breathy whisper, your self-control flaking when you felt him move even closer until your backside was pressed against the sink and your front...

You pressed your lips together to keep a noise that would be much too revealing from leaving your lips. 

Still, you realized your trials and tribulations weren’t over when his hands slowly moved closer to your thighs until his thumbs were tracing faint circles on them. 

“Do you want me to stop?” He asked in a hoarse voice before burying his nose behind your ear once more. You had to want him to stop. Before you could gather up the courage to tell him off as you should, you leaned forward and feverishly pressed your lips against his in a kiss that was all but sweet. Without breaking the kiss, in a display of both strength and coordination that was new to you, Miguel slid his hands under your thighs and lifted you effortlessly, placing you on top of the sink with a gentleness that contrasted sharply with the way he nudged your legs out of the way so he could grind his lower half into yours. This time there was no way in hell you could contain your moans. 

Pleased with the beautiful sounds he was eliciting from you, Miguel’s hands found their way back up to the thin straps of your dress, which he gently slid off from your shoulders before gripping your chin in his hand and tilting your head to the side so he could devour every inch of skin available, occasionally trapping it between his teeth to make sure it’d leave a mark. Even in your haze, you could notice there was something new to the way he was ravishing you. It was as if he was desperately trying to be gentle, to take things slow, just for something primal to take over and coerce him into taking you for himself. 

Once again, you stopped thinking when he pressed the hard bulge in his pants against you, the friction over your barely clothed clit throwing all logical thoughts out the window. 

“We don’t have much time,” You urged him, not even sure if he’d locked the door after himself. However, deep inside, you knew your motives had less to do with the little privacy and more with the way he unhurriedly worshipped your body and peppered kisses all over it, how his hands gently roamed it as if he was trying to commit every detail to memory. It reminded you of what you two had in a way that was still too painful to remember. You wouldn’t lose yourself to the memories of your past and miss out on how good he was making you feel right now. Tonight you weren’t two people deeply in love with one another trying to fight back the regrets of letting go of what was most precious to you, but two strangers about to fuck in the bathroom of a nightclub. 

As if to reinforce that thought, he swiftly pushed you further back onto the sink and pushed your legs apart even more, your dress ridding up almost all the way to your waist. You shivered as new skin was exposed to both the cold beneath you and the heat from Miguel’s skin as he fumbled with the fly of his pants. Meanwhile, you kept yourself busy trying to unbutton his shirt with shaky hands and silently thanked he wasn’t wearing a jacket in the first place. You needed to get him out of as many clothes as possible in the little time you had, needing to feel more of his skin against yours. 

Your desire wasn’t fulfilled until the shirt slid off his tan, broad shoulders, and you were pressed against his bare chest, his hands resting at the curve of your lower back as his head barely slid over your soaked slit, prying a raspy moan out of his throat that sounds almost painful. Still, even when you slid your hands around his shoulders and intertwined your fingers behind the nape of his head, he didn’t move further. 

“What are you waiting for?” You breathlessly asked, arching your back towards him with a huff just for him to move his hips away, escaping your touch, trying to regain some control over himself. 

“I didn’t want to hurt you,” He muttered. Shit. Not right now. Out of the whole night, he had to choose this precise moment? No. He hurt you. He owed you. And now it was his turn to shut up and take it. 

Taking advantage of his low guard, you hooked your feet behind his back and roughly pulled him towards you, another needy moan escaping your lips as you felt him right at your entrance, whatever remaining reluctance keeping him from sinking into you. It took every ounce of willpower to keep yourself from begging. 

“Alright,” He finally says, his hands sliding under your thighs to hold you firmly in place, “If this is what it takes for you to listen to me, bonita, así le vamos a hacer entonces.” 

He accentuated his words by slamming into you and immediately picking up a maddeningly fast pace, the loud music outside hopefully drowning out your endless string of broken moans. 

“I just…wanted you to be happy,” He spoke in a strained voice in between thrusts. 

“Shut up,” You snapped at him. You were happy. And it did nothing but further enrage you to see he was unaware of how miserable you were now without him. Or maybe he was aware because he reached that spot that always made your legs uncontrollably quiver and focused all his energy on it as if he was trying to make up for everything. 

“I love you,” He blurted out as he felt you clenching around his length, his hips stuttering for a second before the sigh that left your lips made him lift your leg further up his torso and slam into you with renewed fire, “God, (Y/N) I love you so much, I can’t do this anymore,” 

“Shut up,” You sobbed, this time as a plead and not an order. Your heart fluttered as you heard the words you’d waited months to hear, and feeling him roughly stroke your walls at this new angle became too much for you to bear. A string of ‘shut ups’ and sounds that resembled his name left your lips as your hands fell to his stomach, trying to push him away while paradoxically needing him to be closer, needing to feel more of him just in case this was the last time you felt him stretch you out in a way you were hauntingly certain nobody else would ever come close to. 

And he wasn’t doing any better. He wanted to pull your head against his chest and wrap his arms around you. He wanted to get on his knees and spend the rest of the night apologizing using his words or his tongue, whatever you wanted as long as you went home with him that night. He wanted you to live a happy, normal life. He couldn’t give you that anymore. Not after that night. Not after the accident. 

But those bad thoughts melted away in his brain when he saw your eyes pressed shut, your beautiful, furrowed eyebrows arching over them perfectly as you chased that high that Miguel knew only he could give you. Something that sounded like an actual sentence left your lips so quietly that he had to lean closer to get it. 

“What was that, bonita?” 

You pressed your lips together, unwilling to repeat yourself until another perfectly calculated thrust pried the half-coherent words out of your mouth. 

“Need you…inside. Please, Miguel, please,”  

Hearing his name being called out like that for the first time in months was all he needed to come undone, his pace faltering as he pressed himself against you, strong arms gripping your waist as he spilled his load inside you with one last labored moan. 

Nothing but extenuated pants could be heard inside the bathroom for a whole, tense minute before you finally moved, taking a few sheets of paper from the dispenser next to the sinks to clean yourself up. 

“What are you doing?” He asked as you straightened your dress and tried to somehow fix your disheveled hair. 

“You wanted to apologize, you did, and I forgive you,” You categorically answered, “But don’t expect me to come running back into your arms as if what you did was nothing,” 

Still, you needed him to know there was hope left for the both of you. So you pressed a chaste kiss to his lips and then his cheek, granting yourself one moment of vulnerability as you looked into his eyes with a gentle smile. 

“I love you too,” You whispered, giving in to the urge to kiss him again. You basked in his shocked look before turning your back to him and going back to the party, where you bumped into Liz less than five minutes later. 

“There you are! Where the hell were you? You missed the countdown!” 

It wasn’t until you looked around at the confetti-filled floor and the large numbers on a screen that you remembered. 

“I went to the bathroom,” You replied, tucking a strand of hair behind your ear and reaching out to take a glass of champagne from one of the several trays atop the tables, “Where did your friend run off to?” 

“David?” Liz asked, a deep red blush spreading over her cheeks, “He had to go home. I hope you don’t mind, but we’re getting dinner next Friday,” 

“Don’t mind at all,” You replied with a bright smile, eyes already scanning the half-empty club, once again looking for that same face. The one you knew you’d always look for in a crowd for the rest of your life. This time, thanks to the small number of people left, it wasn’t hard to come across his eyes. Amused, you raised your glass at him with a soft, genuine laugh. He did his best to look annoyed, but the minute you tilted your head and gave him your best apologetic look, Miguel rolled his eyes and shook his head with a reluctant smile that made you laugh again before taking a sip of that cheap champagne. 

This was going to be a great year.

[yunacoeur]

loser in love - kim taerae

a/n: i’ve been working on this for about a week now and it’s still shorter than i expected it to be. oh well, let me know if you like this! also who do i need to bribe at wakeone to give me jeonghyeon bc i miss him!!!! need him so bad

word count: 3.8k

zb1 | kim taerae, sunshine x grumpy au, angst, cute ending, communication issues trope, he fell first but she fell harder trope, college au, reader kinda sucks but they mean well <3

—

your professor assigns a two-person project in your philosophy class. it’s a paper on whether or not socrates was innocent or guilty of corrupting the youth.. or something like that. given you got a decent partner, it would take just a couple sessions at the library to get it done. you’re not even paying attention until someone walks up to you while you’re reading something on your phone. you look up to see a guy from your class you haven’t spoken to yet, though his reputation precedes him (yours must as well. he seems like he knows who you are). 

his name is taerae, you… think. he’s in the same friend group with sung hanbin and kim jiwoong, which already means he’s popular and well liked if he’s good enough to hang around with those kinds of guys. he’s always got this bright smile on his face, like a literal ray of sunshine walks through those doors every monday, wednesday, and friday. 

“hi,” he says to you, “i’m taerae. you’re my partner, right?” so you were right.

“yep,” you respond plainly. 

he awkwardly waits for you to maybe say something else, but when you don’t, he says, “are you available to meet at the library today? so we can get a headstart?”

yeah and did i mention he’s an amazing student? you couldn’t even imagine doing an assignment the day it was assigned, let alone actually do it, but it’s one less thing to worry about in three weeks and your future self will thank you.

“yeah, i can do 3,” you say and he smiles that bright smile that could make your heart flutter.

“alright, i’ll see you then!” he says, and then he’s off. 

you’re left right where you started, sitting at your desk, staring at your phone. you look over at the couple next to you, being way too excited that they got paired together. they’re doing way too much pda for a classroom and it reminds you, once again, that love is weird. not your style.

—

the first time you go to the library is 3 weeks before the due date.

“so which argument should we use? i think guilty would be more interesting to write about, but innocent is probably the easier side to defend.” he says, looking over at you after going over all his papers with that stupid smile again. it’s kind of annoying how immediately likable he is. 

“i don’t care. up to you,” you mumble, getting your laptop setup to write up your guys’ outline. 

he seems discouraged that you’re only responding to him shortly, but he refuses to give up, much to your dismay, “i want you to pick.” he says, small smile this time. his dimple is still visible, of course. 

“fine. we’ll argue that he’s innocent. what’s your email so i can share this doc with you?” you say, looking up at him, making brief eye contact. 

he’s silent for a second, just looking at you. 

and then suddenly it’s like his soul comes back into his body. “oh, sorry,” he says lamely, typing in his email on your keyboard and handing your laptop back you. he gets quiet for a second, and it makes the atmosphere weird and almost tense.

you feel the need to break it, “do you want to write the introduction and then first two arguments and i’ll write the third argument, the counter, and the conclusion?”

he smiles. you don’t even know why he would be smiling right now, but he has this look of fondness on his face, “sure. let’s work for an hour and then take a break. okay?” he says and you nod. 

you pretend not to notice the way he keeps looking at you, opening his mouth like he has something to say, and then giving up on that thought and going back to typing. 

—

“hi bestie,” you say as you walk up to taerae’s usual seat in the library. and there he is as always at this time. he doesn’t even know himself how he got you to show up here everyday (even if you barely did any work. you had finished your parts of the paper a week ago, but keep showing up to accompany him until he was done.) he can’t figure out why you keep showing up but he wont tell you to leave. 

“hey,” he says, not looking up from his laptop. 

“i got you something,” you tell him. he looks up, curious. 

you got him coffee when you got one for yourself, the exact thing he told you he liked last time.

it makes his heart skip a beat. maybe more than one.

—

“do you believe in ghosts?” he asks you as you type up a different assignment. the question catches you off guard, and you choose to stop your assignment and humor him for a second. 

“i guess so? why?” 

“why do you believe in ghosts?” he asks.

you laugh breathlessly, considering the true answer that you believe, “it just makes sense that they do. especially if their soul had unfinished business.”

“like what?”

“i dont know,” you shake your head, giggling at his persistence, “maybe they left someone they loved dearly behind, and they have to watch over them.”

loved… to love someone so dearly that you soul won’t rest until they find peace. your peace connected to theirs. how beautiful…

—

“do you ever feel like you’re missing out?” he asks, suddenly. a part of you almost already knows what he means. you were always more similar than you gave yourselves credit for.

“what do you mean?”

“i’ve never been in love. always so focused on music and my studies,” he admits, looking over at you, “am i missing out? it is nice to be in love?”

“well, unfortunately for you, you picked the one wrong person to ask,” you laugh at his defeated face, “ i’ve never been in love and i don’t really think i want to. it sounds lame. like i just wanna love my friends and myself. i don’t think romance is for me.” 

“yeah..? that sounds lonely,” he comments, but you shake your head.

“not lonely, just no one to break my heart.”

—

“if we keep going at this rate,” you say as you walk up to him and pull out your laptop, “we’ll probably only have to come to the library one more time. so this is what it’s like to be a good student.” you laugh to yourself as you sit down. he smiles faintly.

“yeah, for sure,” he says. almost looking down, like what you said upset him in some kind of way. it doesn’t make sense why. why would he want to keep working on philosophy assignments more than they have to?

— 

the supposedly ‘last’ time you go to the library is d-5 from the due date.

“do you really hate romance?” he asks, bringing up the topic again. he seems weirdly hung up on it.

“no, i never said i hated it. just not for me,” you sigh, “i’m not really a people person anyway. there’s no one i’d want to date even if i wanted to be romanced.”

ouch.

—

it’s d-day. a beautiful wednesday.

“hey!” taerae says, catching your attention as you get up to leave class. 

“what’s up?”

“can you meet after your classes today? would 3 work?” he asks, knowing full well you just submitted that paper with both your names on it. it was a+ material, what could be wrong about it?

“why? the project is over,” you say bluntly. he smile falters just a bit, but he catches himself and continues on.

“i… need your help to study,” he says, like he came up with it on the spot. 

‘you need… my help?’ you wanna say, but you don’t. you don’t call him out. 

“okay,” you say, “but i’m not staying long. just long enough to ‘help’ or whatever. see ya, tae.” you get up to go, but his hand stops you, grabbing your arm. 

“hey... uhm.. please come,” he says sincerely. something about this feels deeper than just ‘studying’. his eyes are showing how vulnerable he already feels. 

 “i will, taerae. i promise,” you say, “i'm honestly offended you think I'm gonna stand you up.”

he laughs with a bittersweet smile, “sorry!” as you walk off to your next class.

–

he’s sitting at one of those benches outside the library when you walk up to him. he doesn’t notice you at first, just playing on his phone. he looks so peaceful. 

and then he notices you, and smiles that signature smile, “hey! thank you for coming,” he says.

it’s just a tad bit confusing why he’s so hellbent on the idea that you wouldn’t want to come see him, or that it’s so important that you’re here. 

“i’m taking it that you don’t need help studying,” you smile back at him, and he shakes his head, “didn’t think so. you’re a star student.”

“i try my best,” he says, and you scoff at him. he barely tries. he’s just good at everything (except for math. but that’s math’s fault for being too complicated for him).

you shake your head at him, “okay, what did you wanna do?”

“i actually wanted to tell you something,” he starts. that smile of his fades when he gets anxious. he puts his hands in his pockets to hide how clammy they’re getting. you urge him to continue but he’s struggling to find the words, “i-i’m sorry, it’s hard to talk about.”

“it’s okay, tae, just breathe,”

he frowns, seemingly gaining the courage to say his thoughts, “i- i know this is- this is not what you want to hear because you’ve told me how you���re not romantically interested in anyone and you don’t want a relationship. you’re really clear about that and i respect that.”

he closes his eyes as he braces himself for how vulnerable he’s about to feel. he’s preparing to bare his heart out to you, when he knows you can’t care for it like he needs. 

“and i don’t want to make you feel pressured, but it feels wrong to hide it from you while i monopolize all your time,” he says, lowering his face to hide it from you. you can still see how red his ears are getting though, “i had to go and fall for the one person i couldn’t fall in love with.” he says it more to himself, like a criticism. ‘how could i do something so stupid, so self-destructive?’ he’s probably thinking, "I have feelings for you. i'm sorry."

“taerae…” you whisper, coming closer to try and comfort him, putting your hand on his arm. 

he shakes his head again, looking up with you with those darling eyes that make people fall for him left and right, “and it’s not fair to you, but it’s not fair to me either. you don’t want to be in love? that’s fine. but you can’t go and take my heart and write your initials on it like it belongs to you, and expect me to not feel it pounding in my chest for you. that’s…” it’s ironic that so many people probably have feelings for him and yet he’s here, baring his soul out to you, “cruel.”

his eyes, intentionally or not, are piercing into your soul in turn. it’s like he can see every last piece of your being, and it’s frightening to be that known by someone else. they’re pulling you in like a siren song, making you want to give it a chance, give him a chance. his eyes are doing every last thing to make you his, promising you to only ever be yours, to never hurt you, to always make you happy. 

maybe that’s why you left him there with nothing more than a squeeze to his hand and a “i’m so sorry,”. it was easier than looking into those beautiful eyes and tell him no. easier than watching his heart (with your initials on it) shatter.

—

and so you continue on with life. soulessly, you suppose, but every day keeps coming whether or not you want it to.

you keep checking your phone. it doesn’t even make sense why, because he’s probably too embarrassed and upset to text you. and he has every right to be upset at you right now. you left him when you got scared and haven’t even tried to say sorry, much less give him a proper response since that day. he has every right to be pissed at you.

and the shitty part is you know he’s not. because he’s taerae. because he was never mad at you. not when you bugged him when he tried to study. not when you barely worked during your library meetups. not when you were late and not when you were rude to him when you first had to start working together. 

he’s never been mad at you and you know every time you walk past him, he stops to look at you, hoping you’ll turn around, and the fact that you don’t is breaking him even more. all you know is that if he uses those puppy eyes on you one more time, all your resolve will crack. 

not falling in love was your main goal during college. years of being alone, part by choice and part by circumstance, made it so you felt you were better off by yourself. it’s hard to want other people when you’re not used to feeling wanted, and being in love just seems so scary.

were you in love with taerae? that was the real question, wasn’t it?

because he wasn’t that close of a friend. you had barely known he was more than an npc a few weeks ago, and you didn’t really know him that well. he was an enigma, a being you knew existed but nothing beyond his existence. and he wasn’t particularly charming. he was awkward. he was dorky. he didn't dress that well. he was really passionate about things and those things completely consumed him. he initially seemed like an anti romantic up until now, too focused on his passions and life to even think about love.

but every time he had said a dumb joke, you laughed. every time he tried to impress you with how cool he was, sure, it was kinda dorky, but you were impressed. and when he smiled at you, it felt like the world was okay in that instant. he gave you his jacket when he was cold once, he got your coffee before your study session once, and he cheered you on. 

maybe you did love him, but he must have given you no other option. nothing else you could do besides helplessly watching as he fundamentally changed who you were.

was it so bad to be in love with taerae? he’s beyond kind and has endless good will to give the world. and of course it was scary to be in love, but taerae wasn’t scary. he wouldn’t break your heart, he’d give you peace of mind and comfort. 

—

nothing sways you to talk to him quite like another person trying to flirt with him does. they’re attractive, a little mysterious, and intriguing from the get-go- if taerae’s crush on you was indicative of a type, they’d be his perfect match. 

they’re so clearly into him, you wonder if you looked like that when you hung out with him. maybe passerbys thought you were a couple before you were even friends. 

and he’s so clearly letting them flirt. he’s not making moves, but taerae doesn’t make moves like that. he wants to move slower than that. he doesn’t want to get into their pants, he wants them to romance him. he wants to feel courted. you’re not sure what you did to romance him, or how exactly your attitude made him feel courted. 

and it’s so hard to watch him be flirted with because you were the one who left him there. that could be you right now, but it’s not. taerae is letting someone else flirt with him and letting someone else tell him jokes and smiling that bright smile at someone else. that’s what really hurts. 

but you let them be while you jealously sip your coffee, talking to your friend sitting next to you.

“you need to talk to him,” they say, “you need to tell him about your feelings. even if you’re scared. he deserves honesty and you deserve to be happy.” 

and they’re right. you know they are. friends tend to be right about this kind of stuff.

and it takes all day to build up the courage. the second you think you could do it and make it out alive, you run over to his dorm room. it’s across campus, and you really could have just walked, but that means more time left alone with your thoughts, which is a big no no right now. 

—

it’s early in the evening, but even still you’re grateful that junhyeon took pity on you and took you to his dorm room that he shares with taerae. he left you guys alone to ‘talk’ he says with a smirk. if only you were sneaking in for something fun like that. and not to pour your heart out onto his floor and just hope that he’ll be okay with cleaning up the mess. 

“taerae!” you say as you burst into the room, locking the door as soon as junhyeon annoyingly shouts, “you're welcome!”. he looks up like a deer in headlights from his desk to see you tired, out of breath, holding the door against junhyeon until he gives up. he furrows his brows in confusion.

“what’s going on? are you okay?” he asks, "what's wrong? did someone say something?" he's got this look of protectiveness in his eyes. you wonder briefly if he thinks someone hurt your feelings and you came running to him for comfort. it's charming.

you shake your head, “i made a mistake and i came to fix it,” you say, that look in his eyes coming right back. like you’re back in that moment at the library. like it’s that fateful day again, with light wind in the forecast and pollen in the air. you remember nothing but how beautiful kim taerae looked and how painful it felt to run away. 

“i’m listening..” he says, trying to get you to continue, to say your side of everything, because you’re lost in thought and forgetting that he’s standing right in front of you.

you sigh, thinking maybe it’s best to back out, turning around to try the door. hopefully, junhyeon didn’t put a chair outside to keep you trapped so you could do 'things'. you almost commit to leaving, telling taerae you didn't have anything to say at all. it was easier than facing him. that’s when you see it. 

“what’s this?” you ask, pointing to the new bracelet in his pile of usual jewelry. 

“oh… my friend just got that for me, actually. i don’t think you’ve met that friend yet,” he says.

“was it the friend in the courtyard?” you ask, looking up at him. he can’t decipher the look in your eyes, but he nods. you’re half expecting a ‘how did you know i was in the courtyard?’ but you know he’s not going to pry like that. 

“taerae, i-” you start to say, and he looks up again, that hopeful look in his eyes. if you were a better person, you would have noticed how he looked at you the first time and never, ever let someone hurt him. even yourself. 

but you weren’t that person. you’ll learn to be that person now, though. his pretty smile depended on it. 

“i’m so sorry for leaving you there,” you say, getting right into it, “i’m sorry i never gave you a proper response to what you told me, and i’m sorry it’s taken me so long to gather my thoughts. i’m so sorry, i feel horrible for how you must have felt when i left after you said all of that.” 

“it’s okay,” he tells you. it’s not and you both know it, “you don’t have to feel the same about me. that was my fault for falling for you and coming on so strong about my feelings. you weren’t ready for it and i scared you. i was in the wrong.”

and it hurts to know he’s still going to apologize after all of this. he’s too kind and too pure of heart. 

the bracelet comes back to your mind. and you have no right to be jealous because that person did nothing wrong. they were honestly probably a good distraction for him while you were being a coward. but the bracelet, a marker of something of theirs being on his wrist. the thought left a disgusting feeling in your stomach. it was clear in that moment exactly how you felt. 

you come closer to him, suddenly emboldened by the jealousy of a gift another suitor got him and the fact that he was so wrong in his assumption of how he felt. he takes a step back when you get a little too close, like he’s nervous. not scared, but timid about what’s going on. his breath hitches when you look down at his lips like you could devour him. you were so obvious. 

“taerae,” you say, and one last time, he looks up at you with doe eyes, “i thought i didn’t have feelings for you. and then i watched myself break your heart. i knew right there and then that these emotions couldn’t have been caused by anything other than me having feelings for you. i didn’t want to admit it, to you or myself, but…” you trail off, forgetting the last words of your sentence when his eyes find your lips, like he wants to have you now, finally knowing there’s shared emotions there, “i thought i didn’t feel anything romantic for people at all, like i was soulless, and you proved me wrong.” 

“...why did you run?”

“i was scared. i’ve always been afraid to fall in love. i kept thinking, ‘what if he broke my heart?’. i realized how dumb it sounded because… it’s just so unlike you,” you smile at him, seeing all the innocence and kindness in his eyes, and wonder how you ever could have felt scared to fall for him, “and i saw them flirt with you. i told myself i couldn’t be jealous, but it’s hard to not be. i wanted you first, kim taerae. i know it’s not up to me, but they couldn’t have you. i couldn’t let that happen.”

“...come take me then,” he says, still staring at your lips. he really won’t make the first move, will he? you smile to yourself as you step closer, pressing your lips to his briefly, pulling away, and then again, just… not so briefly this time. he pulls away first because lord knows you couldn’t have, “so what happened to ‘i never wanna fall in love’?”

“i didn’t want this initially, you know. falling for you was never a choice,” you say. he laughs with all his chest.

“such an anti-romantic. glad i could turn you,” he smiles, “i’m just happy, in all your hatred of romance and pickiness for people, you picked this loser.”

oh taerae, you’re not a loser. you’re just in love.

[odxrilove]

☆ JOSHUA BOYFRIEND HABITS

pairing: joshua x reader

genre: headcannons, fluff, established relationship?

a/n: 3rd part of the seventeen boyfriend habits series (requested) !! sent an ask to suggest the next member! ask to be on the taglist or fill out the form!

back to seventeen boyfriend habits masterlist!

☆ passes his fingers through your hair to smoothen it down

the first time joshua saw you, your friend had just pulled a beanie off your head, leaving behind messy and unruly hair. it made joshua laugh and he thought your reaction was cute. after you two started dating, his gaze would often linger on your hair, the messy look endearing him more than anything. when you would notice him staring, you would immediately smoothen your hair down, groaning in annoyance while joshua only laughed at your hurried movements. it’s not that he liked seeing you irritated, he just didn’t understand why you had to be so aggressive with yourself. so everytime you aggressively tugged at your hair, your boyfriend would pull your hands away and pass his fingers through your hair to smoothen it down with gentle strokes, a satisfied smile on his face.

☆ always makes sure your seatbelt is put on right

joshua is and has always been very careful of the people he loves. and that includes you. he knows he can’t always make sure you’re safe since you’re not always together and life is unpredictable but he can still try to do so when you are indeed together. his actions speak for themselves and you know he would always look out for you. when you first got your driving license, you were quite scared and thus, would forget the most important things like putting on your seatbelt. that was very irresponsible and you’ve learned to do better over the years. you don’t ever forget your seatbelt anymore but joshua still prefers to check every time, just in case. and sometimes, checking your seatbelt turns into him putting it on before you can, hovering over your body and smirking at the click.

☆ always holds and opens doors for you

joshua is a gentleman, that’s an obvious and well known fact. he’s polite, respectful and always kind. he’s so gentlemanly that it’s even become his nickname, now often being called as the group’s gentleman. joshua takes great pride in that. as his partner, you’ve been the number one receiver of his chivalrous habits and personality. on your first official date (after a few weeks of courting), he picked you up from your work with a bouquet of your favorite flowers. when he met your parents, he charmed them by doing the dishes and by bringing a box of macarons. it’s actually pretty easy to gain a liking for joshua when he never forgets to hold and open doors for you. it’s like an instinct to him, as if you weren’t even allowed to open the door for yourself. it’s sweet and the numerous envious stares you’ve received from bystanders tells you everything you need to know.

☆ has a hand on your waist to direct you when you're walking

you’re known to be quite clumsy. the type to bump into a glass door while reading a message on their phone, the type to let the sink overflow after zoning out, the type to break your heel in a pothole while being busy ranting to your friends. something else you’re known for is being unable to walk straight and do something else. you can’t even take a look at your friend walking next to you without wandering for the life of you. joshua directly noticed that about you and so now, every time he can, he would keep a hand on your waist (with your consent). having his hand on your waist isn’t only to show everyone you’re his, it’s also so that joshua can make sure you don’t wander off, to keep you on the right track as you’re now walking in a straight line, thanks to his help.

perm. taglist: @0x1lovebot @fairybinie @blaqpinksthetic @odetoyeonjun @pockyandme @soobin-chois @soobisms @junityy @kaimal @laylasbunbunny @jaeyunverse

svt bf habits taglist: @baldi-2 @soov @ggyulicious @enhacolor @shuabby1994 @mariecoura

please do not copy, repost or steal any of my work. all content belongs to @odxrilove

[heart4gyu]

teach you pt.2 || heeseung x reader

note: 18+ minors dni!! very suggestive && wayyy more than just kissing in this one!! [pt.1] so i took some advice from the last part hope you all like it !! i started this off and i rly liked it but towards the end idkk (i also haven’t proofread but i’m so tired Zzz)… lmk what you think anything is appreciated ^_^ enjoyyy & gn <33

wc: 2,361 words

you aren’t really sure why you left so abruptly that night. you could’ve kept going, just like heeseung wanted you to. you could’ve made him forget all about her, all about that date. but you didn’t, you couldn’t. you couldn’t stand the thought of ruining him.

but now you kind of regretted it. you couldn’t stand the thought of her having him all to herself even more. she didn’t deserve him. he was sweet and gentle, always looking out for others. she didn’t know that, all she knew was that he could help her get a good grade.

but maybe the real reason you left him there that night was because you don’t deserve him either. he didn’t call or text you the rest of the weekend so you just assumed his date went well. as mush as you hoped it didn’t…

you and heeseung had a psychology project that you were working on together. so he texted you to meet up with him at his dorm to work on it after class. he wasn’t really much of a texter, so you figured you’d just ask him about his date when you got there.

once your last class ended, you made your way to his dorm. it was around 4 pm when you got there, and he was prepared. he had all his supplies laid out on the small coffee table in front of the couch and a bag full of snacks for you to share.

“so i’m guessing you plan on finishing the whole project tonight,” you said. the project wasn’t due for another week or so but if you knew anything about heeseung, it’s that he hates procrastinating.

“yup, so you might want to make yourself comfortable,” he said, sitting on the couch and patting the spot next to him.

about two hours had passed of you two really getting a lot of work done. you divided the work into two and discussed anything you needed help on. if it was anyone else, you wouldn’t have done a thing but he was a really great project partner so you didn’t want to let him down.

“alright i finished the third slide, i’m taking a break,” you said, getting up to throw away some of the trash that had piled up on the table.

when you came back heeseung’s computer was no longer on his lap and he was sitting back watching whatever movie had been playing in the background. “you never told me how your date went,” you said, as you walked back in the room and sat beside him on the couch.

“well it honestly didn’t go as i expected,” he said, laughing humorlessly. “what do you mean? what happened?” you said, turning to face him and giving your undivided attention.

“we went to the movies so we didn’t have to talk much but afterwards when i walked her home, i realized we had nothing in common,” he said, looking down at his hands that were fidgeting, of course. you felt relieved but you tried not to let it show too much. “and she did try to kiss me, but i couldn’t,” he said, looking over at you only for a second.

“what? why? you did really good when we practiced,” you said, wanting to encourage him in case he felt disappointed. “i- i know, i actually felt really confident after you helped me but… i don’t know, i-,” he stopped, a flush beginning to dust his cheeks.

“it’s okay, you can tell me,” you said, knowing he had something he wanted to get off his chest. you could always tell when he had something on his mind.

“i just- i couldn’t… i couldn’t stop thinking about you,” he said, looking over at you, hesitantly.

you swear your heart skipped a beat. “why me? you’ve been crushing on her since the moment she first talked to you,” you said, really not expecting this at all.

“i don’t know, i was just as confused as you are. but the more i thought of it, the more it made sense,” he said, scooting just a couple inches closer to you.

“y/n, you’re the one that’s always there for me when i need encouragement or advice on anything. you’re always nice to me and looking out for me when i don’t make the best decisions. it’s always you. so i couldn’t kiss her because all i could think about is how much i wanted it to be you,” he said, leaving you speechless.

never had a guy made you feel like this just from telling you how he felt. your heart was beating fast and you almost felt like you wanted to cry. you felt such relief that you couldn’t contain it as you smiled down at your lap, touching over your cheeks with your cool hands.

“and if you don’t mind, i’d really like for you to kiss me again,” he said, his puppy eyes pulling you in just like last time. how could you ever say no to him.

“okay but if i do this won’t be practice anymore,” you said, leaning into his space. you weren’t as good with your words as him but you hoped he understood that you wanted him as much as he wanted you.

“i don’t want it to be,” he said, sitting back on the couch as you climbed over his lap. you smiled at his words but he was already too far gone to return it as you hovered over him.

he was breathing heavy and his hands dug into the couch as if he was scared to touch you. you kissed the corner of his mouth as you took his hands and placed them on your waist.

he gulped when you finally leaned in to kiss him. and it was perfect, feeling his lips on yours again.

you didn’t go slowly this time, when he parted his lips you immediately let your tongue push into his mouth. just like last time, he gasped, but this time it was somehow a bit more desperate.

he moved his tongue with yours right away as you kissed him. you placed a hand on his chest as the other combed through his hair.

you gave the hair at the back of his head a tug and sucked on his tongue making him moan. and it was the best thing you’d ever heard, you’d never heard anything like it.

you noticed his hands gripping onto your shirt tightly and he was shifting his hips beneath you. you could see the growing bulge in his sweats and from his heavy breathing you could tell he needed some friction.

you kissed him some more, really enjoying how good he was getting at it.

you knew he probably wouldn’t be able to handle it but you also really needed to feel something in between your legs.

so you sat yourself down on his bulge and through the thin layers of both your sweatpants, it was pure ecstasy.

he broke away from the kiss just to gasp and hiss at the feeling. you figured he’s just never felt anything like this. it was cute.

you placed a hand on his cheek, making him look you in your eyes as you continued to grind down on him. he shut his eyes tightly as he kept moaning, when you suddenly came to a stop.

“y/n no please, i can’t,” he whined, trying to thrust his hips up into you but you pulled away further.

“what? you can’t what baby?” you said, kissing him again, making him moan into your mouth at the pet name.

“i can’t take it, i need you to keep going,” he said, and he already looked so fucked out. he was sweating, his lips were so red and swollen, and his chest was heaving.

you smirked, thinking about how you could probably make him come in his pants right now, untouched. but that’s too mean, and you couldn’t stand teasing him anymore.

you attached your lips to his and sat back down gently this time. you moved your hips back and forth slowly, letting him whine into your mouth.

he was trying his best to move his tongue against yours but he was completely overwhelmed. all he could do was moan into your mouth and try to match the pace of your hips grinding against his.

when you picked up the pace, he sobbed into your mouth and you pulled away to see tears at the corners of his eyes. you leaned down and kissed the tears away then kissed down to his neck, sucking and marking the skin there.

finally you felt his hands grip onto your waist but what you didn’t expect was for him to push you further down onto his clothed cock.

and now it was your turn to moan for him as he moved your hips in a circular motion over him. you kissed him again as you felt a knot begin to form in your stomach.

the kiss was messy as he bucked his hips up into you. your hands began to wander down his chest, and he flinched when your fingers came into contact with the skin under his shirt.

you continued to kiss him as you felt him up, he didn’t really have defined abs but you honestly preferred it. you felt all the way up to his chest and he let out a groan when your fingers brushed past his nipples.

you smiled into the kiss, and pulled away just enough to look him in the eyes. he looked at you curiously before you dropped your hands back down to the hem of his sweatpants.

“can i?” you asked, and his eyes went wide. “y-yes, please,” he said, nodding his head. so cute.

he watched, nervously, as you slid your hand into his pants and past his underwear. you took hold of his cock and stroked it a few times, getting a feel of his size.

it honestly made you shiver how nice his size was, but you didn’t want to get ahead of yourself. he definitely wasn’t ready for everything that you had in mind so you stuck to jerking him off in his pants.

his whines and moans were really indescribable, they were breathy and pretty high pitched. and you found that you liked kissing him while he made those pretty sounds because it only amplified them.

so you kissed him as you continued to stroke his cock and he kept whining into your mouth. but his head fell back onto the cushions when you swiped your thumb over his slit, spreading the precum all over his cock. he groaned loudly, squeezing his eyes shut. the grip his hands had on your thighs was sure to leave bruises.

“fuck,” he breathed out, “please don’t stop, i’m gonna come.” you were starting to get the appeal of guys begging.

with his head still leaned back, you started sucking a couple more bruises onto his neck and collar bones. you took the tip of his cock out of his sweatpants and rubbed circles at the tip while grinding your hips against his again.

his head shot up and landed on your shoulder at the new sensation. he just let out moan after moan, gradually becoming louder.

you knew he was close by the way his cock twitched and his stomach was contracting. his cock leaking more and more as the seconds passed.

“please, i’m- uhhh god i’m gonna come-,” he said, barely able to get the sentence out with how much he was crying and moaning.

just as you were about to pick up your pace for the final time, you heard it. a key being pushed into the lock of the front door and you both scattered.

you got up off of him quickly and adjusted your clothes and hair. and heeseung put himself back into his pants, both breathing heavily as the door opened and his roommate walked in.

“oh hey guys,” he said, turning his back to shut the door, “hope i wasn’t interrupting anything.” he was only teasing but the longer he stood there with no response from the two of you the more evident it became.

he laughed loudly as he stared at the two of you, blushing on the couch. “jake get out! go! go to your room!” heeseung yelled, throwing a pillow at the back of his head as he ran away, still giggling like a teenager.

heeseung threw his head back onto the couch and covered his face with his hands after jake’s door was shut. “oh my goddd, i hate him,” he said, into his hands.

and you laughed, lightheartedly, at probably the most embarrassing thing that’s happened to you in a while.

“on the bright side, at least he didn’t technically see anything,” you said, and he out his hands down with a sigh. “but he probably could hear you down the hall with how loud you were,” you said, teasingly.

heeseung groaned loudly, the embarrassment being too much for him. you laughed again and reached over for his hand. you intertwined your fingers and kissed his knuckles.

“you wanna walk me out this time?” you asked, and he nodded, defeatedly. he got up and walked you to the door, still holding your hand.

as you were about to step out of the door, he pulled you back in quickly by the waist. “wait, just one more kiss? i’ve been through so much tonight,” he said, an exaggerated pout on his lips.

“oh my poor baby,” you said, the nickname making him weak in the knees. you wrapped your arms around his shoulders, kissing him just one more time.

one more kiss. just one that lasted a little well over a minute. when you pulled away, he groaned and complained but you were already walking away.

“text me hee,” you said over your shoulder, as you walked down the hall.

“of course, and hey, maybe you can come over and study or practice again tomorrow,” he said, shrugging his shoulders when you turned to roll your eyes at him.

[rubylovessharks]

Floyd Leech x gn!reader READER IS NOT YUU/MC OK GUYS i finally got an idea :) soso- you know these couples who'd do each others nails, or one does for both? THIS is my idea. i also think itll be good that its gel polish cuz i do that so its easier for me :) alsooo i promised to tag @night-dream3r this is my first time tagging hope i did this right-

As everyone would have guessed Floyd's nails were in a dire situation. One nail being too long on one hand, and two other long nails on the other. A nail that would be too pointy and sharp while the one right next too it would be the complete opposite. So as Floyd Leech's partner for life you took it upon yourself to help him out!

Ever since he saw your pretty nails and the ones you have done for your friends he had to 'book an appointment', not that it actually is one. Every month, and sometimes in a few weeks(tots not cuz he breaks 'em and such, by accident), you and Floyd would have a date like the one you are on today, where you do his nails as he talks about all kind of different things.

As Floyd was talking about a particularly annoying thing that happened to him you were getting out the color you'll put other the coat that has already been under the lamp, a color you remember he once said would "give me a totally new look!"

You pull out..the pink.

"heeey you remembered I once said I wanted to try this one!" he gives you his goofy smile you adore so much, "well I think a 'new look' would definitely spice some things up in your 'boring' life, as you'd like to say." You move your eyes to focus on the small brush that comes out of the pink bottle and start to paint your boyfriend's nails in a pastel pink.

Stroke after stroke you paint each nail in careful manner while Floyd would sometimes stop talking and do something with his open hand. Once you are done you start to pack your items only to be stopped by Floyd's hand. "What's up?" "I don't want this color anymore.. Do them again!" by his face you can tell he isn't kidding, but that change of facial expression at the end makes you think it might be something else...

Could it be that Floyd is trying to make you stay a little longer....?

[houseofevanbuckley]

Sunday sad day - alternative universe where Buck didn’t say anything to anyone. He mended things with Eddie without the coming out part.

So Tommy is patient, so patient. He knows how coming to term with your sexuality “later” in life, or at least after your school/college days, when you think you finally know yourself, can be difficult.

So staying down low isn’t an issue. And to be honest even if they were a straight couple, you’d not necessarily announce to everyone in your life that you’re dating somebody after just a month.

Also a month is so short ? 4 weeks? And their schedule is crazy, they barely saw eachother’s. They text continuously but it’s hard to get off time at the same time, especially when you can’t just come out and say “hey can I leave earlier I have some things with my partner” because you’re not supposed to have a partner.

And a second month is barely more than the first tbh. It’s just 4 more weeks; even less if the second month is February. Well it’s not, but still, it could.

They met a little bit more, dates and even sleepovers. Still above the belt but it doesn’t bother Tommy. And two months is so new, it doesn’t even register as an issue.

It’s been 6 months now and he doesn’t remember how many times he had to see girls flirt with Buck while they’re out with the 118. The 118 who still doesn’t know. And Tommy loves Eddie but if the man tell Buck to embrace the attention and stop refusing to talk more than 5 minutes with a girl, Tommy might break one of his bones during their next Muay Thai Fridays.

It’s 7 months and he got an invite to the 118 thanksgiving party at Bobby and Athena’s house. And he’s leaving early faking an illness.

He couldn’t stay any longer, not when the girl that Eddie brought as a surprise blind date for Buck is spending the night looking at Buck and flirting with him.

Not when Eddie is winking at Buck like he’s trying to push Buck to do something.

Not when each time his own eyes meet Buck’s he sees how uncomfortable he is and he knows he can’t say anything.

Not when his heart breaks at seeing the guy he likes, the man he can feel his heart longing for sit there and let it happens, not after the secrets they whispered into eachother’s bodies during their nights together, not after the endless texting and calls.

So he leaves, he thanks them all and let the bottle he brought behind. He leaves and stay in front of the house for 7 minutes, he watches them go by, wondering, hoping truly that Buck would come after him.

He leaves when the 8th minute starts.

His phone buzzes before he reaches his place.

“I’m sorry” - Evan

“Don’t worry about it” - Tommy

He wishes sometimes that he never accepted Buck’s call all these months ago.

It’s 8 months now and Christmas is here, the 118 is throwing a party at the station. Families and friends. The place is packed.

This time when he leaves he takes the bottle with him, after all he didn’t have time to put it down. Not when he walked in and saw that same girl half draped over Buck while they sit on one of the couches with Eddie who looks like the canary that got the cream.

He doesn’t have to do the actor this time, he just pulls his phone to send a simple :

“Hey, I’m sorry. Some emergencies came up and I won’t be able to come” - Tommy

He sees Buck pull his phone and smile at it as he see the notifications, that smile is enough to have him take one more step inside, especially when he sees it fall as Buck reads the text and he cannot not try to take the frown away, but then that girl move further over Buck trying to see the phone and Buck flip it so fast, pushing it in his pocket with a weird grimace, and Tommy stops moving.

He doesn’t count the minutes when he’s outside, no need anyway since no one even saw him. He goes back to his car in silence, or well as in as much silence as possible when the opened doors of the station let their laughs resonate in the street.

He feels his phone buzzing in his pocket but it’s not like checking it is urgent. Not when his night suddenly got free.

He drives away, turning before the station so he doesn’t have to see it, because if he doesn’t see it the way his heart hurt may stop.

He doesn’t see Buck outside with Chimney next to him.

“I was sure I saw Tommy earlier, he was just standing there. He came in and like just stayed for 2 minutes here and he left.”

Chimney goes back in and Buck stays outside in front of the station.

[watchmegetobsessed]

alright, older harry fic idea: your friend keeps bugging you to start using tinder and you finally give in. you match with this insanely hot guy named harry and agree to meet up for drinks. sitting at the bar you're waiting for him, you look hella fine, two guys try to hit on you as you wait, but you reject them. you wait and wait and wait, but he never comes. angrily you block his number and swear to never use any dating apps again.

a week later your dad who owns a big company is having a barbeque at his own home, since it's a fucking mansion and has a backyard as big as florida. partners and investors come, it's a nice opportunity to mingle and build connections and you come as well, bc your dad likes to show you off and you're also trying to sell your paintings and become an artist so you might fish for some wealthy men who you can talk into buying something from you. its all fun and games until your dad asks you to come over and meet the guy who will eventually be his successor. you walk up smiling, ready to charm him but then you see him and your smile very quickly disappears.

it's harry, who stood you up on the tinder date. he looks like he saw a ghost bc he obviously recognizes you as well. it's awkward, you can't help but be a little bratty to him. later, he comes to find you and he tries to give you an explanation why he didn't show up, but it sounds bullshit, so you try to teach him a lesson.

he is obviously attracted to you, that you find out at the barbeque, so you make it your mission to tease him anytime you have the chance. you show up at your dad's office wearing the shortest skirts or the deepest neckline ever, you make sure to parade by the pool in a tiny bikini when he is over for a business meeting with your father and even go as far as sending him a spicy picture claiming that you sent it to the wrong number.

he keeps his cool through it all, but then one time you're out with a (guy) friend and you run into harry and that's what makes him lose his shit, he drags you into the bathroom like a fucking caveman, saying shit like "does your boyfriend know you're sending me nudes? how many men are you playing with? you like the attention don't you?"

and it pisses you off so you go like "the only time i wanted attention was when we were supposed to go on a date, but you never showed up so fuck off, you don't get to be jealous"

and then he kisses you, like reaaalllyyy kisses you that quickly turns into fucking in the bathroom and its the best you've ever had ofc, and then you tell him the guy you're here with is just a friend. you get interrupted by someone banging on the door so you have to leave and can't talk about what happened, so the next day you're in your studio and harry shows up with flowers and all and he goes like "im sorry for the way i acted last night and im sorry for standing you up on our date, but i actually came and i saw you talking to some other guy and felt like i stood no chance with you, bc im a little older and i couldn't take you rejecting me so i left, im sorry but i want to start over, let me show you how good i can treat you, let me make you mine"

obviously, you say yes, start dating and its all good, you're in love now you just have to tell your dad, you're nervous about it but don't want to keep it a secret so you go out for dinner with him where you break him the news and he just smiles at you after your little monologue saying "he is the best man i ever knew, i trust him with my business and i trust him with my only daughter. harry styles, welcome to the family"

okay this is fucking long but... i like it very much

[nikka-v]

Another day | Vinnie Hacker x fem reader smut

Summary: Realising that Vinnie is not that bad after all.

Warnings: nsfw!, 18+, swearing?, smut and Vinnie is hot as fuck which is warning as well 😏

I am sorry for any mistakes ♥️

You did not like Vinnie that much since you met him and the feeling was mutual. No one properly knew why and honestly you two did not know as well. Maybe it was because you did not spend enough time together to get to know each other or maybe it was because your partners used to date and you two still felt the vibe between them and were mad because they wanted you all to spend time together. You just argued so much because of everything.

But even though there was so much hate between you, there was also something else. Something only visible to a few other people. Everyone always said that when you weren't arguing, you had so much chemistry and an invisible connection but that just made you argue again. And Joey with Sarah, your partners, hated it because they saw that too. And it wasn't different on a wedding to which were you all invited.

"I just do not understand why you have to argue with her all the time and then look at her later as if you wanted to fuck her." you were walking through the mansion where the wedding was taking place when you heard Sarah's voice almost shouting from hers and Vinnie's room. You were spending the whole weekend at the mansion and your room was right next to theirs so you snuck to the balcony and listened to the argument from there, naturally curious about the reason and outcome.

"What is your problem, Sarah? Am I bothering you with my thoughts about you and Joey?" you dramatically gasped and had to laugh quietly because of the situation. Of course, you knew how they were still looking at each other but you did not realise that Vinnie saw it too. After a few seconds of silence, you realized that he did not refuse what she said and leaned a little to try to see them.

"You are an asshole Vinnie, how can you speak like this to me?" I finally saw Sarah just as she walked out of the door and closed them loudly.

"You having fun?" Vinnie suddenly looked your way, making you lean back as if he did not already see you. You breathed deeply and watched as he walked on their balcony with a cigarette in between his lips, holding another in his hand, holding it out to give it to you.

"Thanks," you said, taking the small killer from his hand and after putting it to your mouth, leaning closer to him so he would light it for you. You had to admit that when he was standing there in black jeans and a white button my shirt he was really not bad looking plus how he was holding the cigarette made him even more attractive.

“I wanted to break up with her a few weeks ago because of how she still looks at Joey." he said suddenly, surprising you with his honesty.

"Why are you telling me this?" you could not stop yourself from asking causing him to chuckle a little.

"Because the only person you hate more than me is her so I know that you won't tell her." you nodded, that was the only possible response to what he said. He was right, wasn't he? You looked at him cause you felt his eyes on you and he just smiled with sadness in his eyes. At that moment you did not understand why he was sad.

"y/n?" as you heard Joey's voice you quickly threw the cigarette away, blowing the smoke out and gesturing to Vinnie to be quiet about it. Joey hated smoking and you had a few arguments about smoking already so you didn't want to provoke him again.

"Yes, babe!" Joey's head appeared from behind the curtain and he smiled at you, dimples showing on his cheeks. You quickly looked to where Vinnie was standing but he was no longer there so you looked back at Joey with a weird feeling in your stomach.

"What are you doing here? All good? You have a good time?" he asked and you frowned for a few seconds before quickly smiling. He was not usually asking more than one thing when he spoke to you, but you just thought that he finally started to act as a better boyfriend.

"I am all good, just taking a few moments to chill here," you said, putting your arms around his neck and kiss in him on his lips. The garden lights suddenly turned on, making the surroundings a bit more romantic causing you to smile a little at the kiss.

"Should we go to sleep?" Joey asked, looking at his watches all of a sudden. That weird feeling in your stomach happened again as if you sensed something weird happening. To be honest you expected Joey to want more than just a small kiss on a balcony.

"I mean, I thought we will have some us time," you said, making him laugh a little. He hugged you quickly before starting to walk away slowly.

"I am tired y/n. Maybe another day yeah? We do not have to do it every day right?" you wanted to talk to him more but he already disappeared behind the curtains and you heard the bathroom door closing.

"As if we did it in the last two weeks you asshole," you murmured to yourself angrily, almost jumping when you heard someone else's voice.

"That's how it starts you know? I am telling this to you because I care about you, he is doing it with someone else." Vinnie's voice resonated through your head, making you look at him with a shaking head.

"Sure you do care about me." you rolled your eyes, clearly angry. "He is not sleeping with anyone else. Unless you have proof, stop making up things." Joey would not cheat, would he?

"Whatever you say love." wanting to tell him off cause of the nickname you turned at him but he was not there anymore, leaving you alone with goosebumps all over your body. And as you were falling asleep you could not stop thinking about what he said.

Maybe because of that, you had some toe-curling dreams about him. Of how he would just touch you with those tattoed hands with rings. How he would bend you over the balcony railing or how he would just hug you and ask you about your day. The fucking minimum that Joey barely did. And you apparently moaned a little while sleeping cause Joey woke you up while there still wasn't so much light outside with kisses on your neck.

"What is going on?" you asked, trying to adjust your eyes to the darkness while you hugged Joey a little.

"You were having some hot dreams presumably with me so I want to apologise for leaving you wanting me. I did not realise yesterday that you wanted me so much. You had to bite your tongue to stop yourself from telling him that he should stop flattering himself so much but he was still your boyfriend so you had to let him think that the dreams were about him.

So you decided to make your brain think more about Joey and sleep with him. And that did not go as planned. Half of the time you saw Vinnie unintentionally and the other half you imagined him to make you feel satisfied which was definitely not a good idea. For the first time in a few weeks, you really came and while moaning you moaned a different name. Vinnie's name. But to your surprise, Joey did not even say anything to it. He was so focused on his satisfaction that he just mumbled some things to himself, not paying you any attention. And then when he finally finished, he just kissed you, rolled over and fell asleep. You on the other hand could not just go to sleep.

Your mind was all over the place. As you took a shower you had to think about the whole situation. You were sure that you did not have any feelings towards Vinnie, this was purely physical attraction, right? You expected Joey to talk about it but apparently, he was really not listening to you and did not bring it up for another two weeks. Those two weeks were strange because of how he was acting but in kind of a good way. He asked you about your day, took you on nice dates and brought you many flowers. It started to get even weirder when he stopped wanting us to meet Sarah and Vinnie so much. You were happy because of not seeing Sarah but you wanted to see Vinnie.

It all escalated at one of the parties when someone asked Vinnie to let you all hear his new song. He sceptically looked around the room, probably looking for Sarah before he pulled his phone out of a pocket and connected it to the speakers. Joey went outside a few moments ago to get you some drinks so you just leaned on a wall behind you and started listening to what Vinnie was saying before he put the song on.

"We called it ‘another day’ and it just popped in my head a few weeks ago," he said and when the song started to play, you liked the rhythm immediately. That was before you heard the words and realized it was about you.

You hated me

but you fuck him and say my name

This got stuck in your head. He knew about that night at the hotel. He heard you. You quickly pushed yourself from the wall and made your way out of the living room towards the stairs to get to another floor.

"Hey, wait." you heard Vinnie's voice as you reached the upper floor so you turned around to see him.

"What do you want Vinnie? Why would you sing about that? How did you even know about it?" you asked him quickly and looked him in the eyes. He took a deep breath before he took your hand and pulled you to an empty room, where you quickly pulled your hand away from him.

"I was standing on the balcony that night of the wedding weekend. I found out from other people that they saw Joey and Sarah kissing in the pool so I needed some time to think before I would go tell Sarah." you shook your head and stepped back a little, not wanting to believe his words.

"That's bullshit, he would not cheat." honestly you were trying to convince yourself more than Vinnie who was standing there, not knowing what to do to make you believe him.

"Okay, go search for them, I am sure they are together right now." he threw up his hands, obviously frustrated because of this situation. And so you did what he told you to do. You pushed him to the side to walk around him to the door so you could leave.

"If you are lying to me, I swear I will hurt you." you looked at him over your shoulder, making your way out of the room to find your boyfriend. You immediately saw a group of some guys, so you went to ask them for pieces of information.

"Jack, have you seen Joey?" you asked the curly-haired boy who you knew and he smiled at you nicely before he saw your angry face. He quickly pointed to a room which had closed doors and you almost ran towards it, taking a deep breath before trying to open the door. Locked. That made you even angrier so you knocked a few times before fully hitting it with your palm and then fist.

"Calm the fuck down, occupied!" you heard Joey's voice which made you kick the door and walk to the next room where you climbed a little out of the window to get on the room's balcony. And as you wanted to open the glassed door, you stopped and looked through a small space between the curtains. You put the palm of your hand on your mouth to stop yourself from screaming out loud. Vinnie was right, they were there, making out while he was fucking her on the bed.

A single tear came down your cheek before you climbed back to the other room. You weren't sad as much as angry. You wanted to hurt someone so much as Joey hurt you but you knew you did not have it in yourself to do this to someone you'd love.

"Are you okay?" you heard Jack as you got out of the room with only one goal. Find Vinnie.

"Don't worry about me, have you seen Vinnie?" you tried to smile at him but did not succeed. Jack understood that you were not in the mood to talk so he just shook his head.

"Not for a while," he said, making you think for a second before you walked back to the room where you saw Vinnie last time. And he really was still there, sitting on a dryer with a cigarette between his lips. Before you did not even realise that it was a laundry room.

"I guess you found them." he looked up from his phone and watched your face as he threw the cigarette out of a small window which you wouldn't even reach because of how high it was.

"Yes. I thought you were lying." you sat next to him on the washing machine and leaned your head on the wall behind you.

"Really? You did not believe it at all?" he asked doubtfully, making you chuckle quietly. Of course, you were suspecting it but never thought that it would be the truth.

"Okay, maybe a little but I just do not understand why." you never understood why would people cheat on each other. That was something you would never forgive anyone.

"I know it sucks but at least you found it out." Vinnie jumped down from where he was sitting and walked towards you so he was standing right in front of you. You just found out that your boyfriend was cheating and the only person you could think about was Vinnie. How he was standing there and could give you everything you've ever wanted.

"Help me forget about him, please," you whispered suddenly, not giving it much thought. But Vinnie was not that surprised about what you wanted the gently touched your knees, pushing them apart and coming closer to you.

"Are you sure about this? Don't you hate me?" he asked, leaning forwards to kiss you but stopping a few millimetres away from your lips.

"But I fuck him and say your name, don't I?" you used his own words to make him believe that you really wanted it. And he did not ask again, kissing you harshly and making you moan because of how his hand moved over your body.

You felt the cold rings which he was always wearing on your stomach before he moved his hands to the thin cloth of your lacy bra which showed a lot more than it should. His touch travelled across your body, helping you take off your cropped t-shirt before cradling your face and finding your lips again.

You moved your hands from his biceps to the hem of his shirt to take it off, taking a moment to admire his body and tattoos. Not that you've never seen him like that before but from this close, it was a premiere. You both were looking at each other's bodies for at least a minute before Vinnie suddenly kneeled at pushed up your skirt. You leaned back a little so he could move it even higher and before you sat properly again, he took off your thongs, leaving you almost naked.

"You don't have to. "you whispered as he got closer to you which made him stop his movements and look at you with confusion readable on his face.

"You don't want to?" he asked and almost looked disappointed.

"I do, I just don't want you to do it because you'd have to. Joey didn't want to. Never." Vinnie shook his head, suddenly amused.

"I don't do it because I have to, I do it cause I want to. I bet he wanted you to give him blowjobs all the time," he said, waiting for your answer which he did not actually need because of how you looked at him. Of course, he wanted to but when it came to giving back, he did not want to. Not that he would have a specific reason, it was because of how selfish he was in bed.

Before you could've said something he moved closer to you, leaving a kiss directly on your clit. You almost jumped a little and felt how he smiled because of how he was affecting you. He stuck out his flattened tongue and licked you up your slit to your clit.

"That feels good, doesn't it?" you heard his voice and as an answer moaned. You were sure he knew how good he was and wanted to show you what you were missing out on.

"Too good baby, I don't think I am going to last long." you joked quietly, your hand wovening through his hair to which he reacted by adding pressure to your clit. Over and over again he was slowly alternating between gently sucking on it and teasing it with the tip of his tongue. One of his hands moved back on your chest reaching your nipples over the bra and gently carresing it and with his other hand, he was holding your hip.

As you were getting closer, his hand moved from your hip lower between your legs, filling you with one finger and in a few seconds with the other. With one hand still holding his hair, you moved the other to hold the edge of the surface you were sitting on. Suddenly you felt Vinnie's hand moving from your chest to your hand, locking your fingers together. This gesture made something in you shift, making you feel a stronger connection to Vinnie.

It did not take long for you to feel an orgasm building in your whole body which made you moan Vinnie's name out loud. Because of so much pleasure, you unintentionally pressed your legs closer to which Vinnie reacted with a quiet laugh and with one hand he hold your legs apart.

"You see what you were missing out on?" Vinnie looked at you before getting up and hugging you, planting a few small kisses on your hair and forehead. You could have felt his hardening dick through his pants which caused you to get wet again almost immediately. You moved your hand lower to touch him through his pants, making him quietly moan into your ear. That moan caused you to get goosebumps throughout your whole body. You weren't attracted to men moaning that much but Vinnie definitely woke something up inside you.

"I can help you with that," you whispered, slowly massaging him, to which he reacted with another moan before leaning to the space between your shoulder and neck, placing a small kiss on your naked skin. But as you continued and with the other hand started to push his pants and boxers down, he grabbed gently your hand to stop you from massaging him some more.

"I wanna come with you," he whispered, having his forehead against yours and looking you in your eyes. He looked so in love with you at that moment which you slightly ignored because of the situation between you.

"Okay then, fuck me, Vinnie," you whispered to his lips as you kissed him passionately and pulled both his pants and boxers lower. He had to laugh a little at how impatient you were.

He caught you by your thighs, moving you to the edge of the washing machine and kissing you again. There were so many emotions in those kisses but both of you knew that you won't be able to tell them out loud to each other. As he moved closer to you and pushed himself slowly into you, you could not hold the loud moan and neither did he.

"You feel so good." he was still holding your thigh, moving his hands to your waist to pull you more against him. You felt so good, maybe better than ever and leaned your head back, letting all the moans out. You did not care anymore who would hear you and even I moaned Vinnie's name.

"Someone will hear it, love," Vinnie said between breaths and on his lips appeared a cheeky smile. He definitely liked how you said his name so maybe that's the reason why he moved one of his hands to your clit. He knew what he was doing for sure because you felt your orgasm building up even quicker.

"I don't care that they will." you pulled Vinnie a bit closer when you put your arm around his neck." God, you fuck me so well, Vinnie."

"Say my name again love." he moaned, definitely getting closer as well, and so did you.

"Vinnie, please I am so close." it did not take long before both of your climaxes came. You were sure that was the best orgasm ever.

" I wanna do this again and again." he was looking into your eyes again. "You looked so good when you came." you had to smile a little, touching his cheek gently and with the other hand you pushed his hair behind his ear to see his face properly, you never quite looked at him from such a short distance.

"Okay then." you smiled at him which made him feel a bit confused. He did not think that there would be something more than just this one-night stand.

"Wait, really?" he looked really cute confused like this with a blush on his cheeks and heavy breathing.

"Yes, I think this little relationship or whatever it is we have, can work out." his eyes brightened before he kissed you quickly, making you laugh at his lips. He was always so serious when he was with you before but this was a nice change and you were willing to try it out. You were sure he would never hurt you just because of the look in his eyes. He loved you.

[chaotic-orphan]

Dec. 27, prompt: family dinner

Ehehehehhehehe I love this one hero x villain yes please!! Also two posts in one day? It’s more likely than you think

@the-modern-typewriter @the-modern-typewriter-aesthetic

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Hero felt like they were walking on the clouds when the villain asked them to family dinner over the holidays. Of course they said yes, they loved villain. Of course they wanted to spend the holidays with them and meeting their family was just a bonus.

That was until they were all sat down at family dinner.

The evening had been going so well.

Hero was cracking jokes with villain’s brother and mother, had engaging conversation with villain’s father about the current political climate of the city and had even dazzled villain’s sister, who owned a vineyard, with their wine knowledge.

Then villain’s father started talking about heroes, and the sorry state they had left the city in, and villain put their hand on hero’s and gently squeezed it in reassurance.

Hero of course, knew that villain’s father was in fact supervillain because villain and hero were open with each other from the beginning. No secrets, they had promised.

So when supervillain got to talking shit about specifically hero, hero was ready for it.

Villain however was not.

They had stood suddenly from the table, rocking the cutlery and nearly tipping the gravy boat, proclaiming: “you can’t shit talk Hero and be impressed with my date at the same time.”

That leads to now, where everyone was looking between Hero and Villain who was still standing, electricity sparking in their fingers.

Supervillain looked at hero and hero looked at villain, wanting nothing more than to kiss them for defending them and also slap them into next week because they had just revealed that they are in fact, Hero.

“What do you mean, Villain?” Supervillain asked then looked at Hero, “I’m sorry you’re not related to hero are you? Villain never told us.”

“No, no, no,” hero blushed, waving it away. “It’s nothing like that-“

“Actually it’s very like that,” villain said, practically seething. “Do you like my partner, dad?”

Supervillain blinked at villain. “Well, yes. I think they are quite charming and lovely, villain.”

“Thank you,” said Hero, almost gushing. “You’re too kind.”

“Not at all, you fit in so well with the family,” villain’s mom said with a kind smile and hero could feel their face going red. They reached up to cover their cheeks.

“Well, my partner is in fact, Hero. So if you hate hero, you also hate my partner. When you just said you liked my partner, dad. I will not sit at a table where you disrespect them.”

Hero blanched. Supervillain’s eyes narrowed infinitesimally at hero as he wiped his mouth with a napkin, slowly rose from the table and walked towards the kitchen.

“Villain, would you talk with me for a minute?” Supervillain asked, voice sweet as pie.

“If you insist.”

The table watched villain follow supervillain into the kitchen and supervillain close the door quite calmly.

Hero looked at the shocked faces of Villain’s mother, brother and sister and took a sip of wine, smiling at the sister.

“So is it hard to keep the grapes fresh all year round?” They said, trying to break the tension with a question. They didn’t however get an answer, as the sound of a quite loud argument from the kitchen was growing.

“YOU COULDN’T HAVE TOLD ME YOUR SIGNIFICANT OTHER WAS HERO BEFORE THEY CAME TO DINNER?! I JUST INSULTED ONE OF THE ONLY PEOPLE I LIKED THAT YOU EVER BROUGHT HOME! DID YOUR MOTHER AND I NOT RAISE YOU BETTER THAN THIS?! THEY MUST FEEL HUMILIATED! I AM HUMILIATED! THAT POOR HERO YOU GO OUT THERE AND YOU APOLOGISE PROFUSELY TO HERO AND YOU BETTER MAKE IT UP TO THEM OR SO HELP ME THERE WON’T BE A PLACE YOU CAN HIDE THAT I WON’T FIND YOU AND TEACH YOU A LESSON ABOUT MANNERS!”

The door to the kitchen opened and villain stood in the doorway, eyes low as they said “I’m sorry hero for not telling my parents about you.”

“Uhh—“

Supervillain walked out after Villain sat down, unbuttoning their suit jacket before they sat down at the table again.

“So sorry for my earlier comments, Hero. If I had known—“

“It’s alright-“ hero began but supervillain cut them off.

“It is absolutely not alright. You are too forgiving. Let me make it up to you tomorrow, hmm?”

“I’d like that,” said hero with a small smile.

[moon-alight]

Hiii, hope you’re doing well !!

your writing is so good!! may i please request something with Enhypen where reader comes out as asexual to them? (with a little extra fluff if you don’t mind? <3)

Ah! Okay! I'm excited to write for Enhypen!

Masterlist

Enhypen reaction to s/o coming out as asexual

Warnings: fluff, talk about sexuality

Word Count:

-Heeseung

You knew you should've told him before you started dating. It was unfair of you to keep this a secret but you were rightfully scared. You had been judged for being asexual by your previous partners so this did not make it easier to come out to your current boyfriend.

You were chilling on the couch next to Heeseung as you were both watching Heartstopper together. It was your idea, of course. You thought it would make it easier to confess but honestly, you were so nervous, you binged the entire show without talking about asexuality.

"You were right, I did really enjoy the show." Heeseung said when the last episode ended. "When does season three come out?"

"Hee?" He hummed at your call of his name. "I wanted to tell you something."

Now, Heeseung wasn't stupid. He could tell something was bothering you and indirectly it now bothered him as well. He sat up right and gave you his full undivided attention.

"I like this show so much because. . . well, I relate to Isaac." It wasn't the best way to say it but Heeseung (who had just binged the show with you) understood immediately.

"Were you scared I wouldn't support you?"

"I thought maybe you wanted to break up now--"

"Darling, I would never break up with you because of a minor difference between us."

-Jay

It was the third date and yes, you should've told him sooner but you just couldn't. You wanted to enjoy the little moments with him before he'd leave you after you told him your sexuality.

"I had fun tonight but I could see something is really bothering you." Jay begun as you two walked down the street towards your home. He would always drop you off which was the cutest thing ever. "Did I do something?"

"No! No, of course not." You replied, panicking a little. How could a guy as perfect as Park Jong-seong think he did something wrong?

"Then, please, talk to me." You two had stopped walking now and stood still on the pavement not far from your house. You could've ran and hid away but you really did not want to make Jay your enemy.

"I haven't told you about a small detail. . . a big one, actually." Jay frowned, unsure where you were going with this. He watched as you began to fiddle with the zipper of your jacket in your hands out of nervousness. He sighed and pulled you against him in a hug.

"I really hope I am not comforting a murderer right now." You chuckled at his words which made him smile as well. "I hope you know that you can tell me anything." You nodded, deciding to be brave for once.

"I am asexual." You uttered to which Jay simply stared at you.

"That's it? That's what has been bothering you all night?"

"It is a big deal for many people."

"Not for me." Jay stated. "I like you way too much, sweetheart."

-Jake

You were in the park watching Layla together as she was running around filled with energy. You had been dating Jake for about six months and always felt very attracted to him. . . just not sexually.

You had no idea what was wrong with you because you loved him, you just never understood yourself until you finally took the time to search it up and ended up in the asexual community. You were glad you knew what the problem was, you just didn't know how to voice it. Jake was a real horndog and you knew this.

"Y/N?!" He waved a hand in front of your face which snapped you out of your thoughts and made you realize he had already stood up. "Are you finally going to tell me what has been distracting you for the past weeks?" You knew it was unfair for him not to know but you also did not want to lose him.

"I love you, Jake."

"Oh no, that's how every breakup starts. Whatever I did, I'm sorry. I'm sure we can work it out--"

"I am not breaking up with you." You told your crazy boyfriend who sighed in relief. "I just. . . Jake I figured something out about myself recently and . . ." You looked down, unsure how to continue.

"Whatever it is, I'm sure it's nothing too bad, right?" A million things were going on in his head. Were you sick? Were you terminal? He wasn't ready to lose you yet.

"I'm think I'm asexual. Well, I'm pretty sure, actually." Jake stared at you before a big smile made its way onto his face.

"So serious! I thought you were gonna tell me you were dying!" He yelled as he wrapped his arms around you. "You're such a dramatic person! You know I love you forever. Regardless of things like these!"

-Sunghoon

Your friend was the one who convinced you to tell people about your sexuality before you started dating them. It was better that way as most people really cared about stuff like that but when you met Sunghoon and he seemed interested in you, you were so nervous.

He was easily the most handsome as well as kindest soul you have ever met. He was funny and sweet, loyal and caring and you were sure you'd never find anyone quite like him but he had to know. So, you met in a small coffee shop (where you met three weeks ago for the first time) to talk because he had asked you the previous night to be his partner.

"I read your text, it seemed urgent." Sunghoon said once the two of you sat down and got comfortable in a booth in the corner of the coffee shop you loved so much. "What's wrong?"

"Before we actually make things official, I have to tell you something." Sunghoon nodded, continuing to listen carefully to each word you said as he sensed this was important. "I am asexual."

"Asexual?" Sunghoon asked and you were sure you had never seen him so confused. "Elaborate, please."

"I do not feel sexual attraction to anyone." It wasn't that hard, you have had this conversation with many people before but they never stayed.

"Okay." Sunghoon said with a nod. "Now, do you want to be my partner or. . ."

"Okay? You're not. . . bothered?"

"By what? I must say, you're the first person ever who has not shown sexual attraction to me but I'm not here for the sex. I'm here because I like you, so. . . partner?"

-Sunoo

You had given yourself a pep-talk in front of the mirror in which you convinced yourself it would be as easy as ripping off a bandaid. Just tell your boyfriend you are asexual. Easy as that. . .

You walked out in the living room to see Sunoo waiting for you on the couch. When he saw you, he patted the spot next to him and took the remote control to continue the tv show you were watching together.

"Sunny? Can I ask you something?" You mumbled as you sat down next to your sunshine of a boyfriend. He looked at you with the biggest smile and nodded back at you as you sat down next to him. "I am asexual."

"That's alright, angel." Sunoo replied and kissed the top of your head as he took the remote control and wrapped an arm around you.

"I understand if you don't want to be with me anymore or need some time to think this over--"

"Hey, hey." He had dropped the remote and instead cupped your face with one hand as the other stayed around your waist. "I know what asexuality is and I am not bothered by it."

"How come? Aren't you supposed to tell me how we won't work and then you'll find a person who is better than me and--"

"As if I will ever find anyone better than you?" Sunoo told you with a grin. "I promise, angel, I do not care. I love you regardless."

-Jungwon

You had been friends with Jungwon for a while before you realized you had developed a crush on him. You had known about your sexuality for a long time but always kept it to yourself until he had come to you to confess how much he liked you.

You were thorn because on one hand you were so happy he felt the same way and he wanted to be with you but on the other hand you were terrified his feelings would change once you told him the truth even though Jungwon did not seem like that kind of guy.

"If my confession made anything weird between us, then I want you to know that you are completely free to reject me." Jungwon told you as you had not responded to his love confession from the previous day.

"It's not that, I really do like you back and I am happy you like me too I just. . ." How were you going to say this?

Jungwon lifted your chin up with his fingers so you would face him. His dark eyes showed nothing but admiration and softness. You felt yourself relax when you watched his dimpled smile grow.

"You can tell me anything."

"I am asexual." He seemed to think for a moment before looking back at you and nodded.

"Just to get this straight, asexuality is not feeling sexual attraction to anyone, right?" You nodded as reply. "Thank you for telling me."

"Do you still want to be my boyfriend?" You asked him hesitantly.

"Oh yes, no take-backs." He joked to which you chuckled.

-Ni-Ki

You had never felt so brave in your life. You had recently gotten together with Niki and you were so happy but there was one minor detail you hadn't told him yet so you picked up your phone and texted this to him. 'I am asexual btw'

Niki had stared at his phone for twenty whole minutes before he decided to look it up because in all honesty, he had never heard of it. Once he read the entire wikipedia and scattered around to look at tiktoks for about thirty minutes in which asexuality was explained, he showed up at your front door.

"Next time you have to tell me something important, please add an explanation because I have read and looked at so many different things that I still don't know what you texted me."

"Niki, it is midnight."

"I know, I just. . . I want to understand you and I want to make you feel safe and supported but I cannot do that whan I don't know what it is."

So, you let him enter your house and started explaining everything you knew and honestly, hearing it from you made it all suddenly click in his head. When you were done explaining he smiled at you.

"You are really brave for telling me this." Niki said to which you smiled sheepishly. He hugged you tightly. "Thank you for explaining."

[jaylaxies]

𝗦𝗜𝗠 𝗝𝗔𝗘𝗬𝗨𝗡 𝗠𝗔𝗦𝗧𝗘𝗥𝗟𝗜𝗦𝗧

GUIDE:

M — mature | F — fluff | A — angst

O — one-shot | S — series | T — timestamp

FORGET ME NOT

[ school trip au | m, f, o | 2.6k words ]

finally getting a break from your studies, you decide to join your school on an educational trip to australia. now what would you do if your teachers accidentally forget you at sydney while making their way to canberra, leaving you all alone? but great for you, a handsome stranger is more than willing to help.

3:51 AM

[ officer au | m, t ]

LAKESIDE RENDEZVOUS

[ best friends to lovers au | m, f, o | 1.5k words ]

"did you just spray paint a dick on the wall?" you laughed in amusement at your best friend. vandalizing the city with spray paint at 2 am didn't seem like the best idea to you. "oh come on, it'll be fun." jake had conveniently added with expectantly raised eyebrows. and, well, you agreed.

WISH COME TRUE

[ birthday au | m, f, o | 2.3k words ]

jake only wishes for one thing on his birthday, you.

NOT A PUNISHMENT

[ mirror sex | m, o | 1k words ]

you knew teasing jake wouldn't end well, but never thought it'll get you into this mess, however, you most certainly don't mind getting punished by him, especially when he does so in front of a mirror.

THE SWITCH PROJECT

[ project partners au | m, o | 5.3k words ]

being the top model for your company was something you had grown accustomed to, alongside your photographer, jihoon, always placing number one on the 'monthly evaluation list'. just opposite to jake not being accustomed to be placed second. so when company announced 'the switch project', jake had to turn the tables for him. the hard part? you're his partner and you hate him.

GOLDEN GLOW

[ yoga au | m, o | 1.1k words ]

jake finds your tight yoga clothes more interesting than, well, yoga.

DINNER FOR THREE [ft. heeseung]

[ school au | m, f, o | 2.7k words ]

university was stressful, the constant tests and assignments had drained you enough for you to look lifeless so, heeseung and jake, your closest friends, very graciously offered to study with you and also staying for a bowl of ramyeon, promising that they'll help you destress in their own way.

WINDOW VOYEUR

[ neighbours au | m, o | 944 words ]

you hate wearing clothes at home and your neighbour loves it.

AFTER HOURS

[ librarian au | m, o | 1.3k words ]

you lose your track of time while reading the book at your favorite spot in the library and soon find out that the rain won't allow you go home anytime soon. however, finding the sweet librarian jerking off to porn in the staff area wasn't something you had expected to encounter.

PING! WE SHOULD FUCK

[ best friend’s brother au | m, o, f | 6.5k words ]

trying out tinder was a random thought you had, not expecting to see your best friend’s twin brother there. feeling bold, you swiped right on his profile, never once thinking that he’d do the same and text you right after, to which, you didn’t reply, well knowing that you’ll have to face him the next day for your sleepover with his sister at their place.

ROMAN HOLIDAY

[ strangers to lovers au | m, o, f | 10k words ]

visiting your grandma’s place was more or less your entire plan for your summer vacations and only break you get before your university starts, although, meeting your neighbour, bickering with him and clutching his hand while running away from cops wasn’t in your bucket list.

RULE NUMBER ONE: DON’T FALL IN LOVE

[ fake dating au I m, o, f, a | 16.2k words ]

your ex getting a girlfriend after just two weeks of breakup was enough to infuriate you to the point where you had to step up and make him regret breaking your heart. solution? fake date his best friend and make him jealous!

© jaylaxies | tumblr

do NOT copy, translate, rewrite or repost any of my works on any other social media platforms.