#hope thats not the case bc that was irritating..

[mekatrio]

watched the trailer n i hope we all kill ourselves i mean actually i was reminded abt what i disliked irt botw.... the plot LOL. curious on how theyll find a balance between a plot-less gameplay (if gameplay still resembles botw) and the plot/story. wonder how fast travel will work now that shrines and towers dont seem to be a thing anymore. also the sky islands STILL look rly boring likee.. also omg so many story elements jeez. but also riju 🥺 and this chick?

interested in her.... DARK SKINNED ZELDA AGAIN.. MAYBE....?

[banhtet]

HAYAMI RAMBLE POST

hii. been busy here and there so all ive done is rewatching unfinished anime series and dealing w both asthma and acute laryngitis and depression 🤡🤡

but ive been thinking abt hayami whenever i listen to mitski so. I Have To make a post abf her

this will be hcs mostly.............. 💀 some hcs/interpretation will be ooc as i need to rewatch the anime + reread the manga and the korotan series. but it physically hurts me sometimes bc i get too excited, then ill spiral into hatred for the series. ALSO MY INTEREST IN IT HAS BEEN DILUTING? THATS NOT GOOD!

───────────────────────────────

- i think hayami straightens her hair for the majority of her middle school final yr. bc in the manga, its shown in the manga that she still has curly frilly hair but to separate herself from Irina, its tied up and straightened

- which leaves me to think shes those cases of blonde suddenly turn brunette as they grow older but in her case its like hella obvious. I dont think her mom would let her dye her hair so the dying hair thing is out of the question for me

- this mostly stems from the ova where she has blonde hair + some ppls interpretation of hayami in which she has brown hair and i think thats so swag

- i think hayami has hazel eyes.. just bc it just seems fitting that she does yk. and also brown hair + hazel eyes combo hayami ? God Bless

- how others see hayamis eyes can depend on the lighting.. like when its sunset it appears more brown to others or when its morning, it appears more green. could even be gold in a very specific moment

- its mentioned that hayami is more expressive in the beginning of assclass and gets more stoic later on.

- And then i think abt how matsui tried to box hayami into the tsundere stereotype even tho it just makes me see her more as a person w communication problems and issues handling her facial expressions

- i think hayami naturally just has like an angry face (furrowed brows and all that)..

- combined w her communication problems, hayami is pretty much just misunderstood by her classmates as someone whos difficult and irritable (one example is the boys group chat thing where okajima expresses that he likes hayami and in turns maehara is like "eeeehh... uhhhhh.. dunno dude shes kinda scary")

- its also Very Important to me that hayami has said tsundere-esque lines.. Like the infamous "Dont get the wrong idea" when saving itona and also her line in the popularity ranking ("Its not like im happy or anything" or smth of that nature)

- Ik why she said those but Why is she saying them specifically? like whys she trying to Stay Neutral/not opinionated abt her ranking in particular.

- shes so catcore. Hayami was a latchkey child from a very young age. we dont rlly have any info on hayamis life from her graduation forward aside from some in the korotan, the epilogue and like some meta info,,

hayami was relied on a lot and had to do others dirty bidding. i imagine her believing that it was some form of friendship, some way of maintaining their relationship (considering the absence of her father and mother and her chasing for validations)

i think her previous classmates were afraid of her at the beginning, but when realized that hayami had good intentions, they used her loneliness to benefit themselves

(UTTER OVERTHINKING) do you think that her being "sassy" or smth of that nature is to barricade others from getting too close in hopes of not being fooled/used for dirty works again, its also her nature in general But like at the same time, its prob one of the only approach of communication shes used to (knowing what happens after and all that). Do you think she has disorganized (leaning a bit more on anxious) attachment. Do you think that her communication problems already make her appear to be cold but her interpersonal difficulties drive it further . Why does she have such little connections to the girls despite being seen w them often. do you think abt yada, whos multitalented, jealous of hayami ,whos noted by others for mostly her sniping talent and the rest is ignored. do y

its so weird to me that hayami stagnated in her development? (her being a receptionist, the whole "she strives to be a coworker everyone can rely on" and also singlehandedly fishing chiba out of unemployment)

its great that shes honed her receptionist skills but in the end, its mostly just for helping someone else. and the fact that chiba isnt depicted as like being against it is kinda off.. hayamis known for her stretching thin of herself and chiba, being arguably hayamis closest friend, would. at least realize that she has a self-sacrificing tendency (seeing how observant he is yk)

?? apparently she singlehandledly handles every business and sales matters. insane. also,, ig its fitting that hayami chose a fast-paced position for her job but idk man. Idk its still insane to me that hayami is chibas receptionist..

on a lighter note she cut her hair at some point in the future so thats cool

demi hayami forever. shes 100% demi. i also think shes unlabeled, like she doesnt rlly care what she is tbh. others ask her abt it and shes like "idk up to interpretation" (ooc)

its so funny to me. that in korotan c, apparently she showed up to watch asano having a lil date w princess lea? bc it mentioned her name later on helping lea from the "bodyguards" (along w chiba too.. this makes their viewing their classmates from afar in the animated koro q funnier tbh)

hayami in the skiing club.....

i think her interest/reason for joining is mostly that she wanna try it and also bc i think she saw it on tv a few times and got fascinated by the ppl skiing/snowboarding

dunno where the clubs got the budget to apparently Go Fucking Skiing frequently,, or how the club would even operate (in Middle School no less). but i think itd be pretty funny if the club disbanded some time later and hayami joined a dance club instead (which would make more sense)

i think hayami had done ballet before. as a kid. Just a hc but she wanted smth to do rather than. Sitting watching tv bc no ones home

horrible horrible thought but hayami seems semi like those kids whose parents are on the verge of a divorce (projection) 💀

i think one of the reasons why i tend to read hayami as having avpd is. just the fact that she pays attention to 'the class dynamic and harmony and such'? im not 100% sure on the meaning of that sentence but that just reminds me of my experience w avpd and i Have To hc her as having it

as a final thing :

[kruinka]

tell us more abt ur romfan au 😮‍💨😮‍💨😮‍💨😮‍💨😮‍💨

omg than k u for enabling me so. this is what i want to draw

-isagi kicking ass (comically) -first meeting kaiser sae rin nagi -full body designs kaiser sae rin nagi isagi -shirayukimiya and the seven dwarves -individual kaiser sae rin nagi -kurona isagi hiori nanase besties REAL -kaiser backstory comic -sae pre angst -sae intimidating -crying rin -rin pre angst

but i feel like u are here for the kaiser lore instead so

sorry if nothing makes sense😭

in my silly little brain there is kaiser angst and his father is the pope (thanks mitzi) -kaiser but hes more fake and more bastard than canon the setting is divine power does not do well with magic ESPECIALLY in this nation bc it is a blessed land (real not clickbait) -the royal familys defining trait?? is golden hair that never fades and every 20 years someone with this golden blood will be blessed with stigmata -stigmata in this case means the deity of this land has chosen u to be the next ruler -so breaking news!! kaiser does not have stigmata he only has social stigma bc his mother was a naive witch that fell in love with the king -he still has the golden hair but its also "tainted" with blue from the bloodline of a witch so the hair colours are all natural babie🤩🤩🤩 -anyways his mom thought they would be fine if they just lived quietly in a corner of the palace but nope she dies lol -cue evil queen who does not like the concubine so she plots an assassination -michael kaiser, age 6, motherless -idk how to go deeper into explaining his backstory but i do have an image in my head that i feel like would be better if i drew it out instead -but ofc kaisers world view is now flipped -living quietly and hoping for peace doesnt work so he will live as if he were dead while plotting his grand murder spree -and also two years before the family die kill murder -one of his half siblings received a stigmata -but kaiser kills him anyways bc how would u keep ur faith when all ur life u have been mistreated by those who call themselves children of god -and then the stigmata appears on him and hes just 😟😟 -after claiming the throne he kicks out a bunch of ppl and starts establishing diplomatic connections with the magic tower (cue ness) -bc it is very obvious that its a good thing. to establish connections. but holy kingdom vatican city here doesnt do that bc they are held back by traditions and bias -so after that hes just known as a blasphemous child sitting on the throne -but theres a party of intellectuals and new nobles who support him so like kaisers not dead YET -stuff is messy, his bad rep spreads and rumours get twisted so now hes not only known as Tyrant Who Scammed God (partly real) -hes also somehow a Sadistic Villain That Hypnotizes You With Magic (also partly real)

now in the main story hes all 🤪😏😏but thats how he acts when there is something he wants (scammer mode) -deep down hes 😐😔😠emo irritated and thinks hes a bad person (he is a bad person) -he probably does feel guilty for killing his father and not being able to protect his mother -and like tries to convince himself that what he did was right but sometimes he thinks of his mother and wonders if this is what she wouldve wanted :/ -and sometimes he doubts his ability as a ruler bc his half sibling was the chosen one and not him -being compared to and discriminated throughout ur whole life does something to a man huh -so the insecurities and jealousy issues still apply🫶 -but he is actually quite capable bc what else would u do in ur free time other than study -if u were stuck in the palace and ur mom is dead and ur father is pathetic -i want kaisers character arc to be him actually having a proper meltdown now that his life is no longer Constantly In Danger -and at the end of the arc he finally feels happy to be here something something i havent thought of this part yet

ok so this is very long and its still just kaiser and idek if anything makes sense but i also have stuff for rin and sae and isagi going on in my head

idk if the old romfan rant i posted can still apply to the au thats in my head bc i changed some roles around

[rotshop]

help girl i just woke up and im already thinking abt mag s/o again. anyway please consider ;

[ tw body horror, some brief light gore and violence ]

[ note ; reader is SLIGHTLY described. the only thing mentioned is that they have a noticeable, identifying scar on their face

hank + mag s/o

-he knew you even before the boombox incident. he doesn't even really remember how you two first met, he just remembers that you started talking to him and then just kinda kept coming back. at first he wasn't the biggest fan of you since he was 'doing just fine on his own,' but...he admittedly was already really attached to you. they've never been much of a talker and that's especially noticeable to you at that point in time but ,,, they respond enough with signing, nodding / shaking their head, or the occasional speaking that you're able to carry some conversations pretty well.

-he doesn't really. have. a lot of people in his life. you're really his only real close friend, it's kinda hard for him to fully wrap his head around it so !! they chose not to, instead focusing more-so on whatever it was you were rambling to them about that day.

-not super sure of where to put this lmao but ummm ehe . he's actually surprisingly touchy with you????? like. you've hung out at his house a few times and he just like. you'll start out sitting next to each other and you'll end up either laying with your head on their chest or vice versa . its . a little funny . you tease him about it a little and he just flicks your shoulder. also traces your scar a lot if you'll let them, they're not entirely sure why they do it, they just . like asking you about it occasionally.

-also you have scary dog privileges. they might look like any other grunt at that point but they're still tall as fuck and idk man !! something abt getting a blank stare from someone who towers over u would probably make u shut up and mind ur own damn business.

-again, he's not super good at fully recognizing / acknowledging certain thoughts and feelings of his but . yknow. he can definitely tell he at least worries about you a lot more than he would some other grunt he just met. he can definitely tell there's a reason he doesn't mind you touching him, whether by grabbing his hand to go show him something or just placing a hand on his shoulder or arm (most likely arm, again. hes tall. ). they can definitely tell there's a reason that they find themself genuinely enjoying your interactions.

-after the park thing you don't see them for a long time. everytime you try and call him the lines dead, everytime you try and ask others about him you just get choice words, all in all you're pretty much lost on the entire thing. sure, you know what happened but . it just never sits right with you. it doesn't help whenever people ask questions about them or give you wary looks because of your association, half steps back when you take one forward.

-anyway. yeah nevada goes to shit and you get magnified for the aahw. by now you just. don't really talk about hank. surprisingly, you have a little more of your old memories than the average mag !! congrats. problem is they're all foggy enough that you only really distantly decipher them. lmao. you aren't super high on the ladder but you're a pretty tough mag to beat. you're well known enough that other mags tend to hang around you when there's not much else going on. v2 mags especially think it's fun to mess around with you by jumping on your back or otherwise clinging onto you . idk man u've got like . a little family here .

-at one point or another there's an outing youre on that ends up going wrong. you get split up from the rest of your unit and are forced to hide out in some old abandoned building while you wait for backup. you're a little too injured to try and walk all the way back, a heavy gash on your side preventing you from doing too much in the moment. when you hear heavy steps on concrete you're able to give some sort of noise of relief, turning your head to look over your shoulder at whichever agent in your group had finally found you-

-you're instead met with red goggles and the end of a gun.

-any kind of relief is snatched away, you know damn well who it is by just the bit you can see in the dark alone. even standing in the shade between two windows (one of which you were sitting by, probably how they seen you in the first place- if that's the case though, it's a little weird they hadn't just shot at you through it.) you knew it was him. you're already stumblingly forcing yourself up to as much of your full height as you can manage, taking some kind of defensive position even as one of your hands ghosts over your gash. the throbbing pain of it and the feeling of blood sticking and running down your skin is enough that you can't seem to focus on the fact that he won't stop staring at your face.

-it doesn't take long before your legs seem to fail you, forcing you forward a bit as you kneel in some sort of attempt to keep upright. you're too busy hissing under your breath and screwing your eyes shut in pain as your hand covers your side to notice your company stepping forwards. you're snapped back to attention when there's a hand on your face, fingertips digging into your skin as they yank your head down a little further. you know you should be grabbing him, that you should be digging your claws into his torso and ripping him clean in half, throwing whatevers left aside and leaving. you know thats what you were told to do, what you were told they deserved anyway. yet, you aren't. instead, you're just giving some warning growl as you stare at them. you notice how the end of the gun is pointed away from you, how their touch seems to outline the mark on your face.

-"If you try and hurt me, I'll kill you." That's the only real heads up you get before he's crouching down and shoving your hand out of the way, grabbing something from his pocket to get to work on you. you don't fail to notice how little attention they're paying to you (aside from the focus on your wound, of course), that you could just rush forward and slam them into the ground if you really wanted.

-ok im skippin g ahead bc this is already way too goddamn long for hcs DEJWJCS

-anyway. it's a complicated relationship for a while. the others tend to avoid you a little but he just keeps showing up around you. they keep staring at you and just hanging around in your general area. it's not that much of an irritant if you ignore all the weird emotions and thoughts it keeps bringing to the forefront of your mind, forcing you to once again try and meddle with your memories.

-eventually he just starts walking over to you and sitting down next to you. sometimes he doesn't say anything at all, just sitting there and seeming to wait for one thing another- he never seems to find whatever that is, as he always gets up and leaves without a word at some point or another. then they start talking, its just little things at first, point-blank statements you can't say much on. sometimes they're just saying they and the other three will be gone for a bit othertimes it's some half-demand to let them look at the stitches they did on you (semi-related, he's not good at them. the stitches are pretty rough. at one point or another sanford has to redo them properly lmao)

-but then there's one particular night. they do the normal thing, come over, sit down next to you, not say a word. this time though you note how they're facing you. instead of some reminder or a demand for anything, he's pulling his ask down and asking a simple question. 'What do you remember?'

-it's a long conversation. he's talking more than he normally would by a long shot, occasionally stopping whenever his words seem to especially fail him and get stuck in his throat. you don't even really remember moving around, or even him pulling you in any way, you just know you somehow end up laying next to him with your head on his chest.

-whenever the memories do seem to click into place, it's hard. you have a lot of choice words for them yourself, months of being left alone without a word bubbling up with a vengeance, they listen to them. while some mags (such as yourself) do have the ability to speak, the san and dei don't think they've ever heard one with that much emotion in their voice. they've especially never seen a mag just break down like you do, they're both tensing up a little from their far away spot when hank's walking closer to you. instead of you lashing out or swiping at him though, you just sit there while he wraps his arms around you (as best as he can at least, it's a little difficult but he's able to get them around your neck and reach his other hand behind you well enough). you're eventually doing the same to him, though it's more so just your hands resting on their back.

-it takes a good while for proper trust to be rebuilt along with an honest, proper explanation from hank that only you're privy to. eventually though, there's enough trust that you're able to hang around him again without narrowly avoiding an argument or anything. they don't like being super affectionate or 'vulnerable' in front of the other two, so most times they prefer being in your or their room. also they're still touchy lmao, doesn't help that you're mag sized now and so they just want to hold you . its hard to explain, he's never been super affected by others heights and even when he is it's usually a negative thing for him but . for some reason . he just likes being shorter / smaller than you lol ,,,,,,,, hope you like holding them a lot bc that's what you're gonna be doing

-holy shit these are long so . i think .i am going to stop here.

[scarawayfromfallingapart]

but The (After)life of the Party is one of THOSE songs to me that’s like… to be cliche… a kick drum beating in my chest (again) like idk. This is one of those songs where I think they succeeded in writing it better than I’ve ever felt it but here I go trying to analyze it anyway… I realize I am taking your shtick @petewentzisblack1312 … but this song NEEDS to be analyzed and I am going to try and make you like it :) I have been lurking in ur asks as an anon for a couple weeks and I HAVe to say this off anon… I’m sorry to bother u. My greatest hits include my autotune does not equal bad/talentless rant and my Wilson (Expensive Mistakes) mini-analysis 🤪 but also I learn SO MUCH from ur blog I love it. Anyway!!! Analysis of this song:

Tw : mania, depression, anxiety, substance use

To me this song is about coming down from a manic episode, maybe not even necessarily transitioning right into depression but like. Just coming down from it and kinda seeing the world as it is again, and feeling that kind of mellowed out, where your body allows itself to feel tired again. The title makes it more obvious - he’s no longer the life of the party - it’s over, everyone’s gone home, but he’s still there trying in vain to carry it on.

“I’m a stitch away from making it and a scar away from falling apart” is my FAVORITE line (hence my URL lol)… but the fact that this song opens with that and the narrator is oscillating between feeling 100% and feeling like they’re going to breakdown like THAT is what these transitions feel like to me (ok also I generally feel like this on a daily basis). But this line also gives you a hint of how well it is going… like he’s a stitch away from getting there - the cut hasn’t completely healed so he’s not getting there any time soon : but a scar away from falling apart - like a scar has already healed so it’s old hurt that is threatening to tear him apart —> “my old aches become new again”.

Then we get “blood cells pixelate” which I personally find hilarious since this song has been likened to the sims 3 soundtrack 💀 (I played the sims but I refused to have the music on so I have no idea cannot confirm or deny). Butttt this is obviously like a nod to everything being on film like even everything down to the blood coursing through his veins is made into an image, poster boys for your scene am I right? Also has to do with the scar/stitch - his breakdown is there for everyone to see, immortalized on magazine covers and interviews and E!News segments. But like only the blood cells, like no one gives a damn if he heals from this, thats not newsworthy. Eyes dilate (drugs and/or sex but maybe drugs Bc of the next line - full moon pills got him out on the street at night) butttt mania often comes with insomnia as we well know so. Maybe the pills are metaphorical idk

THEN the narrator becomes an observer - it’s no longer introspective, he’s watching someone else work the room, he’s cutting all ties to them loose, just sitting back and relaxing and watching and I always had this vision of Pete and/or patrick watching some girl flit around the room while he sat there with a lazy smile and drank a beer and leaned back in his chair. BUT on thinking on this more… I think- bear with me - maybe… just maybe… he’s watching himself outside of himself like some kind of dissociative thing (I personally experience that but it’s due to anxiety but it is common among just the general population so who knows) and it’s like you’re feeling that irritable high from the manic phase still and you’re trying to push through and just be part of this party right (or just part of life in general right, like the party is metaphorical IMO) and you separate form yourself in order to get through - your mind and body are not one. You have to watch yourself from the inside out, rely on muscle memory to get you through the party or your job or the tour or whatever it was in his case.

also tying back to I’m a stitch away - right like some part of you is cut in half and I’m a scar away - again, you were cut somewhere, something was severed, mind and body maybe… big brain hours (but also I’m probably reaching for that one)

Anyway then we have the “put love on hold” bc fuck if he’s ready for a relationship - he’s watching this girl desperate for stardom, maybe it’s the girl he’s watching work the room (if it’s not a dissociative thing, or maybe it’s both tbh). Her nose runs ruby red (cocaine is probably the cause I’m thinking, she’s doing lines at this party to be working the room). Death’s in a double bed (orgasms… nice one Pete) but really it’s a classic tale of a girl desperate for roles that she’s willing to sleep around to get there, she’s singing songs that could only catch the ear of other desperate people like her… but… Pete is writing THIS song and Patrick is singing it and they are just as desperate, right, like he’s helplessly watching someone enjoy a party and he’s verging on miserable (or he’s watching himself try to enjoy the party while he’s actually miserable) and they’re trying to catch our ears… we are the desperate… —> “I’m here to collect your hearts/it’s the only reason that I sing”

Then the bridge is where he starts to actually breakdown, the vocals get more intense and strained and chaotic, the sims 3 soundtrack music swells, and he repeats the beginning, reiterating that but adding on “kiss away young thrills and kills on the mouths of all of my friends” - to me he wants to take away all their joy and pain (kills could also = orgasm if u want to be nasty lol and tie it into the death in a double bed) and he wants to feel it for himself because right now he feels NOTHING like he’s right in the goddamn middle of feeling great and feeling like shit and again, to me that exemplifies the transition between mania and depression and we are back to square 1 (to me also thrills = mania and kills= depression but that’s just probably dumb lol).

Also he’s kissing it all away - it’s gentle, it’s loving, like brushing someone’s tears away, he’s not trying to be forceful about it, but he feels like HE should be experiencing all the highs and lows not his friends… or he doesn’t want his friends to suffer… both probably and the chorus is unhinged this time, patrick gives it his all, loses it, signifying hey wait, the narrator DID lose it… but then the song ends with the music coming off that swell, slowing down, relaxing, the narrator resignedly signing off “I’m a stitch away”… giving us maybe an etch of hope, that maybe his stitches healed after all and he did make it through (with hearts and wrists intact I am so corny sorry)

ANYWAY tldr I love this song and it means so much to me and like when I was 15 and found it the first time I was always like “why does this one hurt me so bad, like I don’t get it” but like. Now that I know what bipolar disorder is and that I suffer from it I understand lol. I don’t know if this is how Pete intended this idk I feel like I got some lines right but to ME this is what it feels like. Also it is v fun to play on the violin :)

[rexaleph]

This is not the monstrous perfume post from my drafts, but it might be worse. I’m just thinking about roses.

Earlier this week i got a cute pink sweater that made me want to wear it with the one rose perfume I like, and oh no. Oh no, it’s actually not just a tolerable rose, it’s beautiful and i want to own a big stupid bottle. I guess this is once again down to me losing my hypersensitivity to certain notes. So yes, it is Le Labo; yes, I despise the rustic minimalist brand aesthetic; yes, the prices are outrageous in general, but especially for something that basically smells like fancy hand soap. But like, it makes me feel pretty and fragile, which first of all lmao, and secondly i cant think of another perfume that noticeably affects how i feel. also for being one of those clean soap scents it wears very well and stays in your clothes for days so maybe there is sth to the price. Except of course there isn’t and i would never. but i do want to. it’s rose and a number of woods, as well as cumin but i barely get that at all. its detractors mostly seem to say that it’s not much of a rose, which has got to be why i liked it in the first place. i still notice the rose, and its just enough for me - delicate and subdued like the whole fragrance. the entire vibe is like... effortless, it could just be an incidental combination of someone’s skin, laundry detergent and like the grass they’re lying in. it’s like if the hypothetical  jo malone fan instagram influencer i made up to get mad at became even more infuriating by developing wealth and good taste. i don’t like it but i love it, as the song goes lmao

just look at that ad photo, sets my fucking teeth on edge. the le labo gimmick is that the number (as in Rose 31) represents the number of ingredience to i guess again invoke minimalism, the bastards

anyway this whole experience made me want to look into the handful of rose samples and decants i have lying around, bc i always loved the idea of a rose fragrance even though i didnt like any of them in practice, and never quite gave up hope that i might find one that works for me. they tended to be advertised as unisex or male because obviously i have gender problems, but also because flowers make my nose itch and masculine florals tend to just be less floral (they also tend to include lavender so thats just as bad)  

So i picked up Moschino’s Toy Boy and look at that bottle lmao the vibes are impeccable.

This isn’t the first Moschino that i got curious abt bc it gets talked abt as a playful unconventional men’s fragrance but like, they’re all so bad! even for the money! i don’t remember this one being so broadly bad, i was mainly irritated by a sickly musk note that some brands like to include, and i figured my sensitivity to that might be gone too. i actually think it is bc it wasn’t the problem that stood out this time around. the whole thing is just very loud, very sweet (gotta be the pear) and kind of astringent. It has the rose-citrus (bergamot in this case) combo, that i’ll mention again further down, which is i guess people’s go-to for “Rose.... but make it men”, and it just gives air freshener. It gives aerosol for the bathroom. I can see how despite the notes being very traditional to feminine-marketed fragrances (fruits and flowers) the creators thought of it as male bc it is so discordant and aggressive. i sprayed it one first and couldnt test anything else, even on my other arm, until i scrubbed it off again because it just overpowered everything. anyway, a perfume word to describe Toy Boy would be linear. It opens with its extremety and stays there. Another one would be synthetic, but i don’t like to use that one, and resent it when other people do - it’s snobbish. i think that “unnatural” effect is mostly down to the rose/citrus combination, which does the same thing in Amouage’s Lyric, which is crazy expensive. Anyway I love the teddy bear bottle and the name and the idea of it and how it’s fairly cheap but jesus is the scent obnoxious. which i guess goes w the whole vibe, but also an obnoxious bottle design or name is not literally damaging to people’s health and well-being the way scents can be, so like.

speaking of Amouage Lyric Man. So this is one is expensive and widely beloved.

The opening is absolutely horrific, astringent, soap up my nose, not even room spray but urinal cake. The vibe is upscale shopping mall/hotel lobby bathroom. Lyric Man has a reputation for being a sparkling clean rose, and yeah, the toilet bowl it evokes in my mind is extremely clean. This one is also rose and citrus, and i feel like thats just gotta be a bad combo. Rose is very perfume-y and citrus can evoke cleaning products, so its hard not to end up w sth that suggests room spray. As Lyric dries and the lime and bergamot dissipate it does become warmer, sweeter, spicier and more complex. I get the incense, vanilla, ginger and nutmeg that are supposed to be in there, as well as the musk that becomes more prominent the longer it dries. i can also see how it might have pine and sandalwood. However, the industrial chemical rose sticks around and makes the whole thing difficult to like. The drydown vibe is rose scented incense cones. Or maybe expensive hand cream. I can see the client for this, he’s 45+, fem, obnoxious and insanely hot, and also a heavy smoker w a slightly damaged sense of smell. Sorry i cant be him i guess.

(I will say i’m generally an Amouage hater, I don’t get them, I resent that everything they make comes in a boy version and a girl version, and I haven’t tried one thing from them that i liked. Tbf i was testing their florals before realizing that i generally gotta be careful with those, but also the one woody perfume i tried from them just smelled of untreated lumber so. maybe i gotta look into the feminine line, but again, i resent that they even have that)  

And i guess like my fucking relationship to the brand does matter bc i am not gonna be bitch abt the Etat Libre d’Orange roses lmao

Experimentum Crucis opens green, juicy and vegetal, smells of rose stems and leaves, but quickly becomes sweeter and more powdery, as fruit-shampoo-cough-syrup notes and the actual rose emerge. The vibe is once again sharp, sweet and sour. It’s also a tart fruity rose, but apple as opposed to citrus, which i  think keeps it away from being toilet spray. Finally the dry down is more muted, woody, and green. Basically the sweet sticky fruits disappear and it returns to a lighter and softer version of the first few minutes. so it’s A+ opening and finsih, obnoxious middle. I guess im just not into lychee, it makes things smell like fruit scented shampoo. Experimentum Crucis has the same broad idea as Toy Boy and Lyric (fresh clean fruity rose) but so much better, more pleasant and naturalistic (bad word to use for perfume, but i mean that it smells like living plants), less choking than either of those. But also i do stan ELDO.

I thought this could be my one rose until i tried Rose 31 again. Having them both next to each other right now, they’re different. Experimentum Crucis is fresh and plant-like, Rose 31 is .... lovely lmao. Anyway Experimentum Crucis is also kinda similar to ELDO’s older Hermann A Mes Cotes Me Paraissait Une Ombre, which is also a rose though i dont think of it as one. Its gimmick is evoking a petrichor wet pavement effect which it kinda does, but its generally much less appealing and natural smelling than Experimuntum Crucis, despite the whole idea behind it being to suggest the impression of a natural phenomenon. There is just sth unpleasantly acidic abt it.

I was also thinking about one of the Mendittorosas in connection to this whole rose idea, but turns but that one isnt a rose at all to me, or at leat not to the same extent as the above 4 are. Still very nice though, but i gotta think about it separately.

I guess the conclusion I'm coming to is i havent really changed my mind about rose fragrances, i still dislike the ones i did before but with like a bit more nuance and understanding. also unfortunately the ELDO is very good but not perfect, while wrt Le Labo Rose 31 i am once again appalled by my desires lmao

[wincore]

IT GETS BETTER WHEN I QUIT (╥_╥) until then i’ll just try my best 2 survive

“are you daring me to ruin my life for 2d men” yes 100% that’s exactly what i am saying. U GETTING 2D MEN BRAINROT... >>>>> ill seriously be waiting for the day 😌😌 atsumu is incredibly irritating u will love him. im going to manifest hq tiktok edits showing up in ur fyp JDJWJSJJ

OMGG i never watched coffee&vanilla but now i know not to so thank u LOL i can’t handle watching cringey dramas!! IM SO EXCITED FOR S2 TOO!! i’m not even a horror fan generally but the storyline was so different and mysterious i was hooked!! should i read the manga?? :o how diff would u say it was from the netflix adaptation?

NOO ME TOO!! watching a whole series takes so much brain power and attention 😭😭 esp when starting something new, sometimes i just don’t have the energy to learn abt new characters/a new world

I LOVE THE PREVIEW IM SO SO EXCITED!! “she wins mostly dw” WHEW!! we cannot have jaehyun winning this we can agree on 😫. LMFAOO WHEN I SAW DONGMIN I WAS LIKE :oooo No way.... no way.. that would hurt so bad for me 🙄🙄 perfect man is ur soulmate and u wont even end up together... goodbye.. (ok jaehyun u r ok as well i guess)

YES I REREAD 19K HDJWJJD IT WAS A POST-FINALS TREAT & U ARE AN ACTUAL AUTHOR!!!! also now im rlly curious abt what runway-taeyong’s yn will be like?!? esp in comparison to runway yn!!! give me crumbs pls

“i cannot picture him pissed off apart from that summer fight </3” STOPPPQJDJ ME TOO??? i think e2l with mark is impossible truly... it just doesnt make sense

“i love this characterization of him!!” IM SO GLAD LOL I WASNT SURE ABT MY WORDING!! sicheng rlly is perfect for these kinds of roles & im PUMPED for ceo sicheng for this very reason 👀👀

U HAD ME AT THEME SONG SINCERITY IS SCARY WTFFF!! “i don’t think i’m cut out to write that” i respect ur decision BUT im sure u are capable!!!! when u feel ready i will b here waiting bc i am in luv with just the vaguest concept of this piece! “so him having strong personality traits makes me go 🤔🤔 that man is overreacting” LMFAOOO NOT EVEN JK I AGREE... its disorienting to see him written as intense/broody when most of the time he’s just kinda has one main mode which is 🙂

YESSS FIC WISE BC OF U!!! im in the same boat abt it not working irl, i think if i had beef with a man i would just never interact with them ever again.... no man is worth the time... we are not gonna beef it out we will just cease to know each other. BUT YES BOTH TROPES WORK BETTER IN FIC LMFAO i love the #pining #hurt/comfort #angsttofluff HSJWJSJ

YESS THATS WHY UR VAMP FIC WAS SO REFRESHING!! BC IT WAS DIFFERENT!! if we simply stop pretending bites r enjoyable i think we can begin 2 reverse the damage that media has done to vampire aus

omg that’s a lot of things to do!! PLS MAKE SURE TO GET ENOUGH REST & EAT WELL TOO!! take care of yourself 🤍🤍🤍

- tata

i just started watching jujutsu kaisen and i might just ruin my life for 2d men once again <3 i feel like i wil have a whirlwind obsessive phase like my 15 year old self again goodbye (also. pls. this atsumu character is appealing to me way too much for someone with god level standards for irl men. every time a 2d man is annoying i go 😍💍👰💒 loml) ALSO OK WTF HOW DID YOU PREDICT THAT I’VE BEEN GETTING A LOT OF HQ TIKTOKS IN MY FYP LATELY LIKE I SCROLLED THROUGH 8 CONSECUTIVE ONES 😭😭😭 TATA DID YOU HIJACK MY FYP

sdjgdjs i’ve only ever watched cringe dramas if the man is good looking (but like only clips in this case) or i need to make fun of it with my friends . i like to indulge in horror when i’m anxious bc it somehow makes it better like 😭 at least i have it better than THOSE guys lmfao <3 but also i don’t like heavy gore ahaha. 

some parts of the aib live action i liked WAY better especially bc the actors did so incredibly well portraying the characters (and the 7 of hearts game... bye i took so long coming to terms with it it’s WAY more emotional in the live) and i liked the first game (different in the manga) way more in the live. as for the manga i HATE the ending but also the manga introduces side characters and their stories and i really like that about it! the whole tunnel distance game was actually a side story in the manga and i kind of don’t like them centering the plot too much around arisu (but .. also.. it’s yamazaki kento... and i like that man too much for my dignity..) and also.... i don’t like how they left niragi and aguni’s status undisclosed like that??? like [LIGHT MANGA SPOILERS] they play a very key role in the manga so ?!?! i just hope s2 turns out well netflix i am begging u

ANDSDHSKDJDSL PLS I AM SO SORRY but dongmin is in love with another woman 😔 maybe in some other life. jaehyun is out there being a himbo though so choose carefully what you wish for 🤩 every time jaehyun wins i got mad at myself like no way pilsbury dough boy is winning against miss i know everything

SDHSJD so far lookbook-yn is way more confident and assertive than runway-yn but more in a.. himbo-like way LOL if that makes sense. runway-yn was kind of self conscious and fueled by passion and the need to stand out in their field of work but this yn is more comedic i think lol!! she’s kind of critical and clever in her own way but also she will confidently tell u the wrong directions to the nearest grocery store if u ask bc she thought she knew </3

SDFJGDSJ IT LITERALLY STARTED AS ME DAYDREAMING TO SINCERITY IS SCARY <3 i don’t even have a title yet 🤧 i feel like im favouring this bread man too much but it’s fun to characterize him so <33 i would love for him to be heartbroken and bitter for once 😌 “most of the time he’s just kinda has one main mode which is 🙂” that emoji TOOK ME OUT DSJKDHSD it’s literally him??

men r literally never worth the time </3 either be a lovable himbo or go away 😐 WAIT BC OF ME??? IM STILSLDSHDSKHKDSLJDS ily ❣🌼🌙

why would they make bites to be some sort of sensual thing like literally any other animal biting us for blood would be either horrifying (demon) or just annoying (mosquitoes)

you take care of yourself too!!!!!! hope your job loosens a bit on you and you excel in academics enough to not worry about it 😌 eat well sleep well ily ❤

[mechecolomar-archive]

i replayed tlou a bit ago so im gonna share my thoughts about this 7 year old game :) it’ll be mostly criticisms (bc i clearly like the game and havent really said what i dont like about it) and what i hope nd will improve for tlou2. i’ll kinda reference footage thats already been released for tlou2, but i wont mention any spoilers

so my biggest complaint is the gameplay, controls, and maybe the layout of the weapons. 

A big thing during fights that doesnt feel as good as it should be is the movement. I really dont like the forced jog throughout the entire game. I understand it when joel is hurt or the game wants to to focus on a certain thing in the environment, but other-wise it makes it really hard to explore the map naturally. Another thing when youre actively in a fight with numerous enemies surrounding u, theres almost no way to get out of it unless you shoot the enemy, theres no dodge and the L1 to sprint out of combat usually doesnt work well. This was especially frustrating with ellie who normally dies from one hit. In TLOU2 theyre adding the ability to dodge so thats something im looking forward to and hopefully crouching as a way to dodge works better bc in tlou it felt very slow and was normally used for slow stealth in tlou. 

The ai of npcs often broke the immersion by outright running in front of enemies all the time, no matter what character it was. Nd didnt punish the player by having other enemies detect them, which im thankful for, but hopefully joel, jessie, dina, and lev are a bit better in TLOU2. Before Ellie became able to help me fight she often got outright stuck in the middle of me and an enemy. Ellie was unable to be harmed, but it led to these almost comical scenes where me and some hunter were just swinging pipes at each other but entirely missing due to ellie running in place between us and taking no damage from either of us.

The collectibles were very frustrating (due to the mobility i mentioned earlier) and the map at some points were annoying to deal with. A lot of nd’s games seem to put the hidden items in areas behind where you start, or places that are hard to get to and its really annoying when you have to jog to backtrack or even walk at some times. The underwater parts were also irritating bc of joel’s movement too. The map was usually ok, but the part where you can ride a horse was the start of naughty dog trying open world levels (for some reason??) and the first time was really annoying, especially due to ellie not having the horse follow you while you walk and you having to jog back to her. I honestly can’t see this being too much better based on what we’ve been shown. Ellie will ride a horse for at least 2 times, be in a boat, and potentially be in a car. ND also boasted that tlou2 will feature their largest area yet filled with things and thats not very comforting to me. The only thing i could see them doing to make it better is like at least having your horse follow you or letting you full on sprint, but i feel like they gave you the horse so you can traverse the area without running :/. I think nadine does follow chloe eventually in the western ghats part of tll, so it could be better in tlou2 but we’ll see.

The bricks and bottles really felt useless unless it was for a distraction. I also didnt like how they were considered as two separate items so it constantly looked like you could hold more, when it was just the opposite. I dont think you could run and throw bottles/bricks either in tlou, but i know that changes in 2. Hopefully whatever items u can throw are considered one item and it could be more than bottles/bricks.

sometimes interactions were in an area that were around enemies, so they would get ruined and i personally didnt like that. i felt like areas where you choose to sit and have a convo should be a clear indication the player is safe, this usually was the case but i had a moment ruined because some enemy heard me. you could argue that could be more natural, but i think having a clear establishment or whats going to happen where makes more sense.

I also had an issue with the detection by enemies in the game. I played on easy so its definitely the most lenient it could have been, but the detection sound seemed too short imo. I really wish the game had like a little meter like in most games? Also the detection sound seemed to blend into certain soundtracks played and was sometimes hard to discern between the two. I personally dont understand why they dont have a detection meter considering theres other hud elements on the screen but idk. Tlou2 doesnt seem to have included that and its kinda disappointing imo

The subtitles sometimes didnt show or they were different from what was actually said but this happened rarely and it wasnt that frustrating, it was just something i noticed. This goes along with the ruined interactions. Also the few times the game had a recorder instead of notes for collectibles, it would have been nice if there was a transcript of it. I’m just lazy, not deaf, but i know some people prefer text over sound.

I personally didnt like the controls on ps4, having to constantly hold L1 to move faster than a walk was annoying to me. I also wish there were more control layouts than the one provided, or that you could change it yourself. I wish just toggling/holding L3 would let you move faster, reloading could be square, R3 should be crouching, and circle should be dodging or whatever. 

I also didnt like the photomode but apparently all new ps4 games had that type of photomode? Idk if its nd that likes that version, but it’d be neat if tlou2 had one similar to hzd/gow/hellblade. I think the lost legacy had the same type so it might just be the same :/

This is nitpicking, and isnt quit dealing with the base game, but i wish the unlockable skins were a bit more diverse instead of being 5 diff colored plaid shirts for joel and references to nd or their old games for ellie. The goggles seem to be the only unique item and its still a easter egg. Idk, i just think it’d be a bit cooler if they were more unique? I dont know if the outfits would work like in uncharted 4, with skins extending to other characters like dina or abby, but it’d be cool if they were more diverse.

Its late and this is all the criticism i can think of and hopefully they improve in tlou2, but yeah everything else is good. 

[midoriyaizukustan-inactive]

*clears throat* *pulls up powerpoint* *shuffles speaker notes*

okay kids strap in this is gonna be long probably. im gonna add a read more so hopefully that works, otherwise i am,,so sorry,,

w that lets begin

so. lets start w the basics

season 1: didnt like him. really didnt like him. i have Issues w suicide as a topic in general so when he baited midoriya he lost any fondness i couldve had towards him. then his actions durnig the battle training? hes a fcukin maniac. but i enjoyed learning more abt him as a character so whatever. i thought his confrontation w midoriya in the aftermath of that was,,interesting

season 2: still dont like him, but his eventual coming arnd during the final exam made me more open to him. also sports festival was,,,interesting, ig. i thought it was interesting how he wouldnt accept the win; if he was the same character he was in season 1, he wouldve taken it, i feel like. but he didnt. so hey, growth smwh

season 3: i thought i didnt like him, but then he got kidnapped and i got a case of the shakes(tm) until he was rescued. i rlly vibed w midoriya screaming and crying while he was kidnapped. cut to the provis license exam:

(excuse my crying abt aoyama lmao)(and also the fact that i used to call bakugou “bakugon” yes i know thats not his name yes i did that bc i didnt like him and i think im funny as shit). then,,,the scene. kacchan v. deku 2. uhh i was vibing w him honestly. hes a mood,,,regrettably,,,until he beat midoriya at least

season 4 (so far): pls stop yelling, regrettably relatable gremlin

now lets dive into what all that means huh

i dislike bakugou for the following reasons.

- suicide-baited midoriya. not only that, but he tormented him for years simply because he couldn’t get over his own private feelings; midoriya did nothing to deserve his scorn. literally nothing.

- beyond even that, is still a prick to most everyone he meets; he’s short and irritated and won’t give anyone the benefit of the doubt (at least not as first). 

- even now, he still has issues giving respect or even just being decent to both people he knows and people he doesn’t.

- speaking of, he has never ever apologized for his previous actions. not even after he finds out he’s wrong (like when midoriya tells him he never, ever, looked down on him). he hasnt even really apologized via action rather than words if you wanna try that route with me. he might be better than he was, but he refuses to acknowledge that he was ever wrong in the first place and thats not functional

- hes so focused on “winning” as a concept. it doesnt matter if youre supposed to be an ally to him; if he perceives you as being in his way, he’ll do his damnedest to fucking destroy you. he has few genuinely heroic qualities (not to say he has few good qualities, just few heroic ones); hes just strong and determined, but he’s a case study of how those qualities can be twisted as all fucking hell

- hes so proud. he is s o fucking proud. he has such an issue with pride that i cant fucking handle it sometimes man

i like bakugou for the following reasons.

- he has grown. he might not have said anything to anyone about it, but he has grown as a person since the series started

- he does have morals and he sticks to them. they might be basic things such as “dont be a villain” but theyre. something and he stands by them. hes not a slimy snake is what im saying

- hes funny. when he isnt actively bringing others down, i actually enjoy the screentime he has, bc its really funny, esp when he’s interacting w his friends and theyre having visible fun messing arnd w him

- this particular reason is hard to phrase so let me just. try and word vomit it correctly. i didnt expect him to be capable of blaming himself for smth like all might’s retirement. but he was and i,,,it adds layers to his character that i appreciate a lot. so its not that i like that he feels guilty abt it, but what it means for his character

- his interactions with kirishima. its proof that he’s learning how to be better, slowly but surely, and how to care about others properly. its sweet, genuinely and wholeheartedly

- hes not always rewarded by the narrative, and that makes him much more human to me, which i really appreciate. the biggest example i can think of is that he didn’t pass his provisional license exam on the first try. i think he’s gonna have a low point eventually, but hopefully, from there, he tries to build his way out into a better life as a better person

yeah

its just...very complex. he reminds me of myself, or at least a person i used to be. he actually reminds me of a couple combinations of ppl i used to be; just like bakugou, ive had smth similar to both a superiority and an inferiority complex in the past so its djkfjkdjnk,,,regrettably relateable,,,,,,not at the same time like he does but yknow the feeligns and how they clash are still there

but yeah. its bc he reminds me of myself i both hate him and like him.

like he reminds me of aspects abt myself i h a t e. i have issues w pride, i used to be a huge jerk (not to the degree he was, thank god, but i have a conscious now so when im reminded of how i used to be in like elementary school, i feel ashamed and since bakugou hasnt fucking,,,acknowledged,,the abuse he put midoriya through yet,,i get angry with him)

and the one guilt episode we saw him have reminded me of a very dark time in my life (2016) and its just. oh no. so thats where the anger fizzles out because i cant hate that more than i just feel pity abt it

in contrast, its bc he reminds me of things i hate abt myself that i have high hopes for him. i crawled out of the hole i was in; i made it through the stages of being a prick and then being thrust into a guilt-induced depression. im certainly not a good person, but im much better than i was

so just,,im already proof that ppl can change, but,,,,if i had a character to cling to when doubt came creeping in, i think that wouldve be great. i know im not the only one that feels like this. if bakugou can make the right turnaround, i think he could mean a lot to a bunch of people, me included

obviously the turnaround would have to be done right (and he better fucking beg for midoriya’s forgiveness) but i have hope that it can be

he has a long way to go, both in action and in word. but i am hopeful for his development. he reminds me of many things i hate about myself, but also to push on despite those things. my feelings about him are complicated due to that

yea. heres my book report sir djknkjnsknfjkn

[tulipscomeinallsortsofcolors]

bless you and your bountiful writing skills for allowing something as amazing as Something Bound To Fall Apart bc 1) BIG FUCKIN MOOD PATTON HOLY SHIT 2) Logan is a blessing and 3) YOU WRITE THEM SO WELL???? HOW MUCH DO I HAVE TO PAY FOR SKILLS LIKE THAT????

HURT! COMFORT! LOGICALITY! ALWAYS!!!

im glad you enjoyed it Logan Hug PAtton Right Now Challenge

also alskjalsjk i hope i dont come off as an asshole here in case you weren’t actually asking for genuine advice-

and i EXTRA HATE to be That Person because when i was Baby Writer i thought this response was so goddamn irritating but it really is just a matter of practice. just writing writing writing and you know, infinite monkeys on infinite typewriters, eventually the stuff thats coming out starts to sound good

as for actually useful advice - for just writing in general, stop caring if other people are going to hate it. someones gonna hate it. I’m sure theres a whole bunch of people who are sick as hell of me putting laoft on their dash constantly (though i appreciate that they have not come for me in my inbox)

twilight and harry potter and fifty shades of gray - all of these things were bestsellers, and there are whole internet subcultures devoted exclusively to despising them. 

so if someones gonna hate it no mater what you do, like - fuck it, right? write whatever the hell you want. go fucking nuts. hog wild. cram all your interests into one thing and just go off the shits

and this is a more specific technical-ish one, kinda, that i thought was really good practice for 1) characterization and 2) How To Plot - write fusion AU’s

like how nearly every fandom has at least ONE pacific rim AU? its something of an extended balancing act, getting the the characters and their relationships to fit into this context without tearing the canon your putting them in to pieces, BUT you also dont want to just cookie cut the pacific rim plot (just as an example) because that’s just copy-pasting, essentially

so you get the practice of How To Plot BUT you already have a framework to build on, which takes some of the pressure/stress off, which is a hell of a relief

[boratanical]

loona x their relationship with color

a lot of loona theories dealing with color talk about how the colors relate to each other rather than how they represent the member so heres a more in depth look into the color’s psychology ! a lot of times, colors will have different associations based on individual experiences and that plays a big part in loona !

heejin - bright pink 

bright pink is known to be vivacious and stimulating. bright pink is a more rich hue of the usual pink and we can relate that to heejin’s song being vivid - a song about color and standing out. the mv is filled with very vibrant colors 

hyunjin - yellow

yellow has dual associations - positivity and loyalty compared to cowardice and caution. in japan (aka hyunjin’s country), the color yellow stands for courage. in her mv around you, the mv and song talk about how shes trying to find courage to confess to her crush but she constantly cowards away from doing so. even though at the end she doesnt have the courage to approach her crush, she seems hopeful that one day she’ll be able to do so. yellow is a great representation of hyunjin’s duality in which despite her shyness/cowardice, she continues to build confidence and hope  that one day she can do it - her storyline shows the positive and negative meanings of yellow

haseul - green

green is the most common color in nature and is often associated with rebirth . the thing is that despite her color being related to nature, her mv is at iceland aka a place with no nature. in the beginning of let me in, haseul says “Deep in my heart, in that dark place/You suddenly entered / Awakening my world” which can mean that Iceland is what her heart originally was before a person (i guess a lover) enters her life and helps her be born again - so maybe after this lover enters her life her heart becomes green (”is now being colored with you”) aka reborn ? also green is the color of hear chakra and it represents a bridge between the physical and spiritual world so maybe its not even a lover but rather another distant version of herself (which is repetitive in loona) is being discovered and shes becoming one with herself ?

yeojin - orange

orange is known to be energetic and it draws attention, just like our maknae !!!! its also known to be a flashy color and give a childish appeal. in yeojin’s mv later, it is similar to hyunjin in which it shows duality of her color. positive associations include being sociable (her multiple suitors) and negative associations include being self indulgent (scenes where multiple items/gifts are shown). another thing with orange is that it helps lift up personal limits, similar to how at the end of the mv she gives the frog a kiss on the cheek despite saying how they shouldn’t rush . 

vivi - pastel rose

pastel rose / light pinks are mostly associated with love and romance. lighter pinks are known to have a calming effect and be associated with feminine qualities like softness and nurturance. vivi has the most wholesome mv out of all of the girls in which she is softly crushing on a boy. 

loona 1/3 

hyunjin, haseul, and yeojin have citrus colors while heejin and vivi have shades of red. overall the colors complement each other. 

kim lip - red

just like her debut, kim lip and red are often associated to have power, energy, and are known to attract attention. in fact, red is said to be the most attracted color (like how eclipse is considered to be the  most popular solo). red accents on neutral backgrounds are a way to attract attention (which her mv happened to do) and red also symbolizes sophistication which kim lip is often associated with. 

jinsoul - blue

blue is a color favored by many people too (just like how jinsoul and sitr are popular). people who are associated with blue often have a need to feel unique and authentic - like how sitr was unique to all of the other loona solos due to edm elements. blue is also known for its ability to relax and stimulate a person at the same time and is called a calm authority which can be seen regarding to the structure and sound of sitr. sitr mentions how at first things are out of control until “You have spread blue” and then they become “standing on top of this night” so maybe the lover/another version of herself in this instance takes over jinsoul similar to how haseul gets taken over by green - but in jinsoul’s case the blue helps her gain authority 

choerry - purple 

purple is a balance between red and blue - it has the stability of blue (the fun meoldy) and the energy of red (the beat drop after the chorus). the color is known to create a unusual atmosphere and be unique and observant ( like how choerry and mirrors - a weird way of communication and she has to constantly look for/in mirrors). a lot of words that are associated with purple appear in lcm’s lyrics - magic ( Love cherry magic ), imagination (ah ah, Imagine ah ah), special (Our special days start today). also, purple does not appear in nature a lot so anything thats purple is often associated with being rare and delicate - this is the opposite of lcm mv bc at the end everything becomes purple which could represent how shes in paradise because in no other natural way would a purple landscape exist 

oec 

red, blue, and purple will cause irritation and arrogance if too much of the colors are present aka the produce are strong effect - similar to their girl crush image

yves - burgundy 

burgundy is a combination of red (vivi / i know a stretch) and purple (choerry). its a sophisticated color and people who like the color often considered what others think about themselves. they have unconventional thinking and have a desire for being unique. burgundy ppl also are known to be introverted so maybe at the beginning of new yves was alone until she meets a lover/another version of herself that allows her to open up more and gain confidence (The look of you when i open my eyes/ So bright that i couldn’t dare to approach / My heart that wants to be like you / Gets colored, filled with you) . also, burgundy lacks a sense of fun/energy that pink has - so maybe instead of a different version of herself like haseul and jinsoul have, vivi is what brings a new self out of yves. yves later on is seen to have a god figure (with the members and orbits) and burgundy is known to represent high social status !!!

chuu - peach

peach is a charming color (just like chuu). it helps bring courage to yourself (chuu eventually taking a bite out of the apple to be with yves) and help others not to be afraid (helping gowon have a revelation). negative associations include relying to heavily on others and fear of being alone, which we see in heart attack where chuu constantly wants to be with yves. just like how yves has an actual person (vivi) to bring out change, chuu has yves and she ultimately changes her (”Dipped you inside my white heart, and made it red” - burgundy has red in it so yves turns her heart to a lighter shade of red since her heart is originally white which can result in a muted color like peach or even a similar color to yves’ lover which chuu wants to be)

gowon - eden green

in the first part of one and only, gowon is seen to be in the dark/hiding but she eventually becomes one with herself/has love for herself and she becomes overall lighter. similar shades to eden green like aquamarine and turquoise are associated with a release of guilt. in gowon’s case, she feels held back until she eventually comes to turns that only she can make herself better and this can represent her release of guilt (the guilt of  holding herself back?). other meanings of the colors include being able to heal through play, being childlike, and being denied what we want because we dont work hard enough. based on her mv, maybe gowon felt like she wasnt trying hard enough to improve herself which resulted in a guilty feeling and eventually she realizes that only she can cause improvement in her life and she eventually becomes healed and can now enjoy herself. or rather then not working hard enough, shes trying to protect herself from getting hurt (another association to the color) and as a result she shields herself away from everything. once she connects to her spiritual self (turquoise is known as a color that connects to the spiritual world), she can finally enjoy herself. some other fun stuff is that turquoise represents friendship (yves, chuu, and gowon running together at the end of the mv) and that burgundy is considered the opposite color of aqua and that burgundy is used to balance out aqua (yves going to gowon and crowning her).  

olivia hye - gray/silver 

gray is a cool, neutral balance color that represents a lack of emotion. its associated with loss, unsettling feelings, and being timeless (”They say that time heals / Even those words became pain for me”  but if gray is timeless that means olivia hye doesnt have time to heal oooh snap) . gray is also a color that represents conformism - having no personality (which is seen in love4eva). people who like gray often try to protect themselves from the world around them and prefer a safe and balanced existence. silver has a mature sense of justice and often reflects energy back to where it came from  - we can see scenes of the egoist mv being bright pink (known to be a fun color but is reflected back to represent anger for olivia aka the first betrayal) and for some of olivia hye’s scenes in love4eva turn red (olivia hye suffering from the other girls leaving her aka the second betrayal) - this is why an individual’s experiences are significant in the portrayal of color in their life!! 

yyxy

all of the girls’ colors are a combination of colors which could symbolize how 1) they need each other to be who they are or 2) their fates are intertwined 

[lunatic-fandom-space]

Episode 12 is 24 mins long, its the longest one yet please tell me theres something here thats not just filler

Its the same day as the previous episode and shes walkin around, doin what she always does and interacting w/ the villagers, I think we'll just show this as a kindof montage

I feel like she hasnt been interacting w/ Emmalyn since she moved into her own house, maybe they have a lil girls afternoon at Emmalyn's or something to distract her

Then we get the scene w/ Logan at the plaza, which plays out like it does in the OG, I might adjust Aphmaus dialogue to be a bit more irritated n shit. I also might lead into the scene by having one of the villagers be like "ay, this merchant isnt selling stuff, what up w/ that"

Once shes done w/ that, she goes to check on Brendan again and has an exchange w/ Garroth thats slightly different than the one in the OG, I mainly wanted him to say that he and the Brightport doctor helped Brendan bc yknow, he was there too. I would still like to have Garroth being good w/ injuries as a trait though, bc hes a guard and I feel like it makes sense for him to know how to handle them

Also, at the end of his plea for Aphmau to stay here I'd like to add something like "And I ask of you, please rest. You look... tired."

Okay, ive decided that Aphmau doesnt have a hamster, rn she just has her cat so Im cutting this subplot about the hamster growing istg if that turns out to be important

So yeah, Aphmau leaves decides to check on Zenix and asks him if he's feeling alright bc yknow, hes about to go chase not!Zenix and he seems like a dangerous fella. Their convo starts the same sans a few tweaks, Im extending it a little and adding more of a back and forth so it seems more like normal human interaction, and Im cutting that bit where he asks her to make him three arrows bc thats another one of those things that makes sense in a Minecraft RP but not really in any other story

Logan has set up a makeshift archery stand like in the OG and Aphmau approaches him but his dialogue is a bit different bc yknow, Zenix actually does have a bow and arrows here. Maybe he can instead mock him for being really bad at archery, saying smth like "A real knight would know how to use more than one weapon!". Maybe that could even trigger some kind of fight between Zenix and Logan bc Zenix is not standing that far away from him. Idk, I feel like quite a few of these convos really need to either be longer or feel less like they take place in a vacuum where no one else can hear them, but I'll worry about that when I polish this a bit more

In any case, ya girl is too tired to deal w/ this so she just interrupts them like "Hey, Zenix, do you mind showing me your archery skills" and so he does and he sucks ass which is. not great. And Aphmau is just like "ahaha, yea, you, youre not good... hopefully you'll get better though 👍 im leaving, have a nice day" and then she leaves and goes to rest at home

Man, I feel like some of these episodes are just so nothing, I hope i can rework them into something thats a bit less hard to pay attention to. And again, a lot of these issues just come down to "theyre trying to tell a story in Minecraft, but it currently just comes across as a playthrough of a fantasy openworld rpg in the worst way possible" but stilllllllll, i have a really low attention span man :(

I also get why theyre taking it slow in the beginning, I also want to take it slow so that the audience can get attached to this place and the people in it so that its like, tragic when shit starts hitting the fan but ughhhh idk what this is man

[tbhstudying]

ok but i'm korean too but i was born and lived in spain for 13 years and some people at my school always say that i don't look korean and doubt my ethnicity (? i don't know if that's the right word i'm quite bad at english) and think i'm half-korean it's so annoying i think i know who i am

another anon asked:Haha I don't get why people don't see you as Korean? I get the same question asked a lot as well (since I have big eyes with 쌍꺼풀; that's actually one of my favorite parts of my face, and I usually don't like my face lol). I feel like each race has a certain beauty ideal that foreigners expect most of the population to fall into and that's just not true? Idk it irks me when people say that (but I know that it's just b/c they're curious or don't know, so I try not to let it bother me too much 😊)

another anon asked:i dont know if its you not looking like a kpop idol (i mean to them it may be idk and thats not right) but its usually a general comment ppl may make? ive been told i dont look chinese many times bc i look a bit mixed lajsks im not saying youre overreacting just offering perhaps a different perspective? It may not be right or desirable but as far as looking like a kpop idol it may not always be that haha this was just a comment it doesnt mean anything! 💞💞💞

another anon asked:Hey i hope this question is not rude?? But you said both ur parents are Korean. So you’re Korean. But born in America right? So Korean-American? Again im really sorry i’m just curious. Cause if you’re 100% Korean you would be born in Korea? Sorry sorry again ): i really hope this isn’t rude im just curious. Both of my parents are from Frans but i wasn’t born there. But i do speak French. So technically speaking im french?

so i’m gonna answer all of these in one go bc they’re related

the reason why it’s rather irritating for me is bc i always get told that by people who assume that all koreans look the same or have to abide by one similar appearance / face. like the second anon said, there’s that certain beauty ideal that most people expect koreans to fall under. there are dark-skinned koreans, koreans with double eyelids and koreans with monolids, koreans with a variety of sizes and shapes, etc. the reason why i mentioned the “looking like a kpop idol” thing in the tags is because the prevalence and popularity of kpop has spread and cemented the idea / appearance of what a korean “should” look like in many people’s minds. i’m not saying that it’s the case for every single person; that’s just the general reaction and reason that i get.

it’s irritating because i shouldn’t have to validate and prove my own identity based on another’s assumption that i am not who i say i am. years of struggling with my appearance + being told that i don’t look korean enough has made me sensitive to those kinds of comments. i know that the anon probably didn’t mean to offend + and almost all of the people who ask don’t mean it either, but the question still hits a soft spot for me.

as for the last question, i am korean in terms of my ethnicity, asian in terms of my race, and american in terms of my nationality. nationality is a person’s connection to the political state / country that they’re affiliated with. ethnicity is the person’s identity involving their heritage and ancestry and culture and all that. my parents, for example, were able to change their nationality from korean to american by immigrating to the u.s. + obtaining citizenship, but they are unable to change their ethnicity because they can’t just get re-born as someone new. 

hope this cleared some stuff up for y’all!

[sicklylittlesnowflake]

SPIDERMAN AAAAHH i just saw the movie this brings me so much joy okay peter gets a cough or a cold or something not really that major and mr stark notices but doesn't say anything because he's like 'he'll tell me if he needs something' or whatever then when peter goes to get a drink or the bathroom idk FRIDAY is just like 'Mr Parker has a temperature of .... ' or 'needs urgent medical assistance' or smth

(This is a sweet ass prompt, anon. And I’m all for Tony trying to be a suave dad like “I must test him” and that fails horribly lmao bc Peter is a stubborn shit..here’s some more Spiderman! Also u might notice I’ve incorporated the tom holland meme discretely lol)

When Tony first discovered Peter through that YouTube video, he had seen him as a talent. A potential colleague in the future, a team mate and someone he could help along find their footing. But Tony had never anticipated what had come for him instead.

Instead what Tony found was a kid. A kid who was without a doubt, certainly a talent and special, but he was a kid. He was lost, he had issues, he was a misfit who desperately wanted to be like everyone else and didn’t exactly love himself. Peter had been exposed to the horrors of the world too soon; having lost his Uncle, who had been his father figure quite recently. He had daddy issues, and Tony was no stranger to those. In those eyes Tony saw himself years ago, a boy trying to pave his way through a misguided childhood, and trying to come out of it a man.

Tony had people who had helped him along the way, mentors, friends, the like. And for them, Tony would eternally be grateful. Tony could only hope he could be the same for Peter, because he deserved it. He really was a good kid.

A bond had grown between them, and Tony had grown caring and protective. This had not been his plan at all. He was unprepared, making it up as he went. Tony had no clue what it was like, what it took to become a father figure. Hell, how would he know something he never even had? Even so, he had made it a mission to make sure Peter could have something as close as possible. He knew he would come up short, but damn well Tony would try his hardest despite that.

Tony would try and push communication with Peter. What he recognised in Peter was the struggle to reach out to others, in fear of perhaps rejection or belittlement or the fear he would not be understood. When Peter did rarely reach out, he very much held back. Tony wanted Peter to be more open, so he could achieve this connection with others he longed to have.

Tony started inviting Peter more and more to the Stark Tower, much to the boy’s delight. He still had his pride, of course, he would still tell Peter not to get his hopes up and this doesn’t mean anything, but the both of them knew that was simply not the case. Tony had started to care for this boy.

So when Peter exited the the elevator, looking pale and ghostly, Tony couldn’t help but feel extremely worried.

Happy was not far behind him, raising an eyebrow at Tony. A sure symbol telling Tony that something was most certainly wrong.

“What’s up, Rudolph?” Tony greeted as Peter shuffled into the room, his already pale face a pasty white, besides a rubbed raw red nosed and dark circles beneath his eyes.

“Nothing much, I got an A in my Spanish test,” Peter said casually, his voice hoarse and ridden with congestion.

Tony blinked, the protective side of him desperately wanting to just pick up this kid and wrap him in blankets. He was so tempted to do so, just on the brink of scooping the kid in his arms but he refrained. Peter would tell him if something was seriously wrong, he would have to. Besides, they had just had that little heart to heart about communication last week, right?

Tony shrugged, “Thats good, Spanish is a good language to have in your back pocket. You wanna see this new suit I’m developing?”

Peter smiled weakly, “Of course Mr Stark!”

Peter coughed a chorus of congested, chesty little coughs into his arms for the third time since Tony began his lecture on a new technology he was developing.

“That’s super cool Mr Stark,” Peter rasped out, his voice extremely hoarse and congested, sounding like it was on its last breath.

Tony raised an eyebrow, “You alright there, Pete?”

Peter cleared his throat, sniffling softly, “I have a bit of a cough, Mr Stark.”

Tony nodded thoughtfully, taking this as progress. Peter was beginning to admit things, and that was enough for him. If things were to go awry, the kid would tell him. “Alright, Pete, give me a shout if you need anything or need to take a break.”

Peter coughed again into the crook of his arm, “Of course Mr Stark.”

“Peter, will you go and process this for me?” Tony asked casually, passing over Peter a sheet of calculations as he tweaked the coding of some advancement he and Peter were working on.

It took Peter a good few minutes to snap out of his fevered trance and he nodded. The sudden return to reality was jarring, and made him feel extremely dizzy. As he began to move for the first time in what seemed like forever was a little bit of a shock to his system, unable to walk in a straight line and shaking as he walked.

Peter squinted as the bright light of the screen shone, the intensity of the light blinding him and inducing a headache. He let out a barely audible groan of discomfort as his free hand made its way to his temple. He slowly and weakly typed out the calculations onto the computer, until an irresistible tickle itched at his throat.

Peter swallowed and cleared his throat, hoping that it would go away. The tickle pricked at the lining, causing his eyes to prick with irritated tears. He tried to keep it in, finding that he wasn’t really breathing. Eventually, the itching was too much and he exploded into a series of irritated, itchy coughs. He managed to lift his arm up to his mouth to conceal his germs, hacking an incredibly fit of chesty, throaty coughs that hurt his chest.

The tickle would only persist, causing more desperate coughs out of his chest. He just couldn’t stop, an endless series of coughing that he wished would just stop. Suddenly he felt a warm hand rubbing his back, and a glass of water being pressed against his lips. Peter drank gratefully, the fresh cool liquid soothing his inflamed throat.

“Thank you Mr Stark,” Peter croaked out, chest heaving as he struggled to regain his composure and catch his breath. He felt weak and faint due to the prolonged period without oxygen in his system. Peter leaned against the table to try and support his feeble body.

Tony sighed, “You sound like you’ve got a frog up your throat. But seriously though, kiddo, you’ll say something if you need something, correct?”

Peter nodded, “Yes, Mr Stark. I’m fine for now, it’s just one of the colds going around at school I guess.”

Tony nodded, unable to mask the suspicion and concern that was growing on his features. He turned back to the tech he was developing and Peter followed shortly after, but he still couldn’t quite shake the feeling he was making a mistake here.

Peter sniffled softly, wiping away at the beads of sweat dotting his forehead due to his fever. His cheeks felt extremely warm, and he was certain he resembled a toddler who was playing with their mother’s blusher. His head was pounding hard, like his brain was being thrusted and stabbed numerous times. He rubbed at his temple aggressively, willing the pain away but to no avail. He groaned, feeling extreme discomfort at how warm he felt.

His palms were sweaty and it was extremely gross for the touch screen computer he was working on. His vision was fading in and out of darkness, he could hear his heart thumping in his chest. He felt so panicked and sick that he couldn’t stand this, but he didn’t want to worry Tony or make him think he was weak. Peter had worked so hard to get Tony to like him and he didn’t want that all flushed down the drain.

“I’m just going to the bathroom, Mr Stark,” Peter announced, trying not to fall or walk straight into a table because the world was currently spinning. He had hoped if he had just splashed his face with some water he could cool down a little bit.

“Of course, Pete,” Tony replied, continuing to tweak at the piece of technology. He didn’t look up as Peter left, not noticing how Peter shook and wobbled as he walked in a zig zag formation.

Tony had lost track of time, engulfed and lost in his work when suddenly FRIDAY activated.

“Mr Stark,”

“Yes, FRIDAY?” Tony responded, not looking up from his work.

“Mr Parker has a temperature of an alarming rate at 103.4 degrees. He has currently lost consciousness and is on the floor of the nearest bathroom.”

Tony’s heart dropped. He felt a wave of nausea rush through his body and an icy, bitter cold sensation wash over his system as he froze. He breathed in heavily, heart heavy and breathing shallow, “..O-okay, thank you f-for letting me k-know, FRIDAY.”

Once Friday deactivated once again, Tony inhaled sharply then was sprinting towards the bathroom.

Being a superhero, there were numerous times where he had to run fast. Times where he had to sprint his heart out for the sake of his own life. However Tony had never ran as fast as he did now, running for what may have not been his own life, but a life that meant more to him than his own.

He burst through the bathroom door and found Peter curled up on the cold hard ground, looking extremely sick and pale. Tony let out a small gasp, his heart breaking and racing as he looked down at this boy who looked so weak and like he had fallen apart. All because Tony was too slow to catch him.

Tony took in a shaky breath, kneeling down to examine Peter’s face. His skin was scorching hot, his face scrunched up in discomfort. His hands shook violently as he examined the boy, letting out a quivering breath in anxiety.

“F-Friday, p-please do an evaluation on Mr Parker,” Tony stuttered.

“Mr Parker has a high fever and a bad cough. Should the cough not be treated this could potentially gravitate into something a lot worse, for example a chest infection.”

Tony breathed in shakily, running sweaty hands through his hair in anxiety. His heart raced and chest cold, swallowing hard, trying to steady his rigged breathing. He blinked back tears, feeling a plethora of guilt of guilt flood his anxious mind.

“P-please tell me w-what to do,” Tony basically whimpered.

“First sir, you must stay calm. Panicking will not do Mr Parker any good.”

“I can’t not fucking panic! This kid is sick because I fucked up! Tell me what to do!” Tony snapped.

“Mr Stark, your emotions are clouding you. As a father figure to Mr Parker you must not hold any resentment towards yourself because it does not benefit either you.”

Tony slid against the wall, hands pulling at his hair, “I can’t do that, FRIDAY. I can’t be enough for Peter. I’m not enough for him. I want to be. This kid deserves the world and..I can’t give it to him. How can I give him something I’ve never had?”

“You cannot give Peter the world. It is as simple as that. He never asked for that. He needs you, no one else. The first thing you just do to fully love another individual is to love yourself first.”

Tony began to relax slowly, letting out a shaky laugh, “That’s really dumb and cheesy. I didn’t know I programmed a sappy rom com into my AI..but that actually helped. Thank you, FRIDAY. I guess..I’m just upset that I can’t give him everything.”

“No one can. He can never have everything, Mr Stark. That’s just the way of life. All he’s asking is for you to be there.”

“I will.”

“Are you now ready to receive instructions on how to care for Mr Parker?”

“Yes I am.”

Tony scooped Peter into his arms, heading towards the room that had been prepared for his stay. Over the past few months, Peter had started growing a small collection of his own stuff to put there. In fact there was a small drawer filled with things for his best friend Ned when he sometimes came over.

Tony put Peter down onto the bed, tucking him into the blankets. He brushed away the strands of sweaty fair off his fevered forehead and sighed quietly.

“Okay, what do I do?”

“Go and retrieve a damp washcloth for his forehead.”

Tony went off to get one, and draped the towel over Peter’s forehead. The younger boy let out a tiny noise of satisfaction, his face relaxing and as did his muscles, looking a lot less tense and uncomfortable.

“I’ve contacted your doctor to check on Mr Parker. I’ve also forwarded all information from his scan so he can come equipped with medicine.”

“You’re the best, FRIDAY.”

“I know, Mr Stark.”

“God, a lot of me translated into your coding, huh?”

Peter woke up the next morning, feeling weak and groggy, but a lot better than he had yesterday. He shielded his eyes from the light coming from the window. He blinked in confusion as he felt the soft mattress and crisp white sheets. As far as he knew, he was on the bathroom floor.

He got up, trying to make himself aware of his surroundings and trying to piece together what had happened when he heard the door creaking open. He whipped his head around to see who it was.

Tony’s eyes widened, “Oh! You’re awake!”

“..what..?” Peter stated, extremely confused.

Tony smirked and set down a tray of medicine, a mug of tea and an extremely aromatic soup. He sat down at the edge of the bed, “You fainted on the bathroom floor and you had a  dangerously high fever. I had to call a doctor to come in.”

Peter felt a pang of guilt strike him as he bit his lip, “I’m so sorry, Mr–”

Tony softened, “No no, I’m not mad. Well, I am kinda.”

Peter looked down awkwardly, feeling guilty still. It was like when Aunt May was scolding him for not cleaning up properly and leaving a mess or coming home late. Super awkward.

“I’m kinda mad because I told you many times to tell me when you needed something. I thought we had a deal to communicate. We had a heart to heart last week and everything.”

“..I know, Mr Stark, I’m sorry. I just..i worked so hard for you to like me and now you finally are and I was just afraid that when you saw the actual me, weak me, that that would all go down the drain and you wouldn’t like me and this time you wouldn’t take me back–”

“What?! Peter, I would never–” Tony cut himself off and sighed deeply, pinching the bride of his nose. He inhaled.

“..Okay..you know what. I shouldn’t be mad at you. You know why? Because I’m not listening to my own advice either. It’s not fair I get to break the rules.”

Peter looked confused.

“..I’m not communicating with you either. I’m sorry I made you feel that way, Pete. I know I act like I don’t want you around..but the hard cold fact is I really do, and I’m so so sorry it came across that way. I just..really care about you, Peter. I was so worried last night when I found you unconscious. I thought I had lost you..that I had failed you..”

“You don’t owe me anything, Mr Stark.”

“..No. I do. You are my family now, just like Rhodes or Happy is. Recently, I’ve really come to care about you and I short-circuited. I was so afraid I wouldn’t be enough for you and that I would fuck up just like my dad and make the same mistakes.”

Peter softened, “Mr Stark..you are enough..”

Tony shook his head, “No, I’m not. I never will be. And that’s fine. Im never going to–but I will still try. I’m not going anywhere, Peter.”

Peter blinked back tears, inhaling sharply, laughing shakily, “T-thank you, M-Mr Stark. I’m sorry I didn’t say anything.”

“I’m sorry I didn’t either,” Tony said, wrapping an arm around Peter and pulling him close and embracing him into a warm, loving hug.

Tony pulled away, a smirk creeping onto his lips, “Okay, time for medicine!”

Peter made a face of disgust.

Tony opened a bottle of medicine, carefully pouring the liquid into the spoon but messed up and ended up spilling some onto the sheets.

“Well shit–hey, I just said I would fuck up a lot,” Tony chuckled.

Peter giggled, “That’s perfectly okay with me.”

[dilfhakyeon-moved]

yO i was abt to write to you abt the new modc ep (what's going on with the weird cuts at the beginning jcbjfbjb im crying) but i saw your post so!!!! tell me abt your dream bro i wanna hear abt it!!!!!! -✨

OH I HAVENT SEEN IT YET RIGHT I FORGOT IT CAME OUT TODAY!!! Let me watch it then we can talk abt it !!

And well my dream is pp long so bear w me 😔 i don't have the 'read more' function on mobile so i apologise in advance for everyone who comes across this !! I'll edit the 'read more' into it when I can 😊 ( i hav edited it hehehehe )

SO . actually there are several parts to this dream and I woke up between the first two parts but ... YEA.

At first I was home but a cat had gotten inside my house, I already had two cats ( my current cat and the one that will have died one year ago exactly tomorrow... yes five days after my birthday december is a cursed month for me. but if u wanna know abt him just search 'tchoupi' on my blog ) and I don't think my girl was okay w that new cat ? also new cat looked wonky sjhsjsh ? I wasn't sure abt its behaviour bc it seemed like it cld get irritated fast. In the end my mother told me to throw it out so I did against my will but when I saw it walk away... it had a missing leg.... I was like oh shit dude no come back... so I went and opened the front door and it came back running !!! I couldn't leave it like that w/o food if it already was incapacitated in a way. so that was my new cat. everything ends well ( I'm pp sure I forgot a part of that part but it's not the one I'm interested in )

SECOND PART... THE CÅSTLË. i was in a castle that was more medieval than renaissance styled or whatever the fuck i didnt study architecture but yes this. it had a courtyard with a fountain and that courtyard had a beautiful view on The Unknown ( aka fields and forests and stuff yknow just. The view ) but there were also bridges ( not the rock kind the "we use it in movies to make a character dramatically fall after the villain cut the rope" kind ) and little paths to go to The Unknown. there was a built-in church ( not a christian but i guess that was a smart choice given most attendees were fire emblem characters and they were definitely christians ) and also stables i guess ? but the front stables were empty and i didn't get to see the actual stables. the front stables had a pathway going around them ( there was a front stable on the left and on the right, with the courtyard being a little pushed back ? like if you left the end of the stable pathway you were already past the courtyard )

so now picture all ot this but suddenly the sky is super dark and everything is grim and gloomy. like a typical halloween movie. everything that was neat feels now worn out and the pathways are definitely scary, nobody wants to go there !

i was looking for my friends ( aka mercedes from fire emblem three houses ) but somehow couldn't find them, a fight broke out between ingrid and annette ( also fire emblem three houses ) and i don't like rich horse girls nor do i like racists so i was about to beat ingrid's ass. this big dude comes in and threatens me so i scold him and he and ingrid both go away. i win. i talk to more people but they're all acting weird except annette i guess. whatever weirdos i'm out

next i keep looking, but now i'm not alone - i'm not sure of whether it's a real presence or just a spirit until the end of this sequence where this boy tells me where to go and what to do to fix things a little, so i go into both stable pathways and end up being possessed twice ( demonic possession isn't as bad as they tell you i turned out fine ) so when the boy tells me where to go next i'm like "are we getting possessed a third time ?" he chuckles. ( i am gay so that was cute )

but we don't get any time to do that third thing ! we get out of the pathways and everyone is planning to go fight whatever is beyond The Unknown ! i look at the boy and awake me now pictures him as kraam from the stranded. cool i have a nice partner in crime i'm okay with that. the others leave, there's a lot of them but a second group is getting ready ! so kraam-but-not-quite grabs my arm firmly but like he doesn't hurt me or anything and we start going into The Unknown as well. im like hey wtf do we do now. and he tells me oh these two groups are going mad that couldn't be us let's go find the stray kids ( awake me now realises this is ~cringe~ but dream me was like whoa a solitary group of ppl who fight bigger evils ! BC YES THAT WAS WHAT SKZ WERE DOING IN THIS DREAM but i never met them ) so we can join forces w them and defeat these ppl. i look back. i see the second group from afar bc they have torches. im like wow this is like beauty and the beast.

something happens, idk what, but kraam starts running ! i'm a slow runner so i thought oh fuck not again but i ran after him anyway, the next bit is us running through a sort of jungle ( the sky is clear again ) and like its CRAZY i fucking loved that bit bc WOO ADVENTURE !! ( im a sagittarius )

then we slip between two trees' leaves and end up in a facility. we keep running bc if we stay there We Will Die. suddenly i am slowed down ( which leads me to believe before that he was holding my wrist but released my wrist when he slipped between the trees ) but he checks on me which i appreciate because that means he would rather die with me than survive without me, romance luv

his father ! the bastard. tries to kiss me in front of his mother. im like lmao dude thats disgusting die n go to catholic hell. i push him away and tell him off, he gets pissed but i cant go look for kraam bc his brothers r telling me abt how we're gonna go on a road trip. im like ? the world is abt to end tho ? but apparently my dream rly wanted a drama plot so fine.

his brothers have, allegedly, caught on to an alleged potential relationship between us. no im not gonna complain abt it im lonely and sad and gay so my dream fills in for me. theyre talking abt how theres not enough room for all of us in the van unless i sit on kraam for the trip but they ( specifically the one brother who oddly reminds me of dbk rain ) somehow make it into a sexual joke ? being me tho i didnt get it KSBSKDH... they were like talking abt legs ?? i remember it was abt how it wouldnt work with smth with four legs 'unless i could go with three' and like i dont even know what the hell that was supposed to mean we're talking abt a van not a horse ygwim ?

idk if i woke up after that but my brain did picture both me complaining to kraam abt his dad doing that and him getting quietly angry and just telling me to not come close to him again just in case hed try it again AND the beginning of the 'road trip' where i was indeed using kraam as a seat. and i was sleeping bc idk maybe i was tired from the running ! i hope my next dream is the continuation bc boy that was a whole drama episode

also i gave up and started calling him just kraam but it wasnt kraam ofc he just had kraams face from what i remember ! but he wasnt kraam at all

[laurent-ofvere]

prison fic Qs (spoilers): 1. Why did L make the racist comment to D at the start? I'm hoping because he was blown away by D's hotness and wanted to have some kind of interaction with him even if hostile 2. What was the book that D bought L? 3. What was Lazar in prison for? I'm guessing growing/selling ganja 4. What's the story with Auguste's watch? 5. Why was L so upset about Nic giving more evidence? Was Nic motivated to act by D's love for L, or was he just older now? Thanks matey

1. i’m not entirely sure what you’re referring to, my only guess is when laurent reads damen’s name tag and says “what the fuck kind of name is that?” i didn’t intend for that to be racist at all, i’m sorry if it came off that way. i wanted their first interaction to be hostile so damen would from the start go through this mix of “oh wow he’s beautiful” and “oh wow he’s irritable” and i figured a name (which to me, damianos is uncommon) was a simple way to do it.

2. i made it up. i’ve read a few james patterson books so thats the vibe i had in mind but i wasn’t actually referring to a certain one.

3. tbh i didn’t give it much thought, i don’t give most things thought if its not explicitly stated. i loosely relate it to drugs in my mind, but i couldn’t tell you much more than that.

4. again, didn’t give it much thought so there isn’t much of a story there. however i do view young laurent as someone who always tried to emulate his brother so i can see auguste having something similar that laurent loved, so auguste got him his own watch as a gift. 

5. laurent wasn’t aware that what nicaise had gone through was more than a one time thing, so the very fact that nicaise had evidence to give broke laurent’s heart bc it made him realize that nicaise suffered more than he initially thought and bc of that he felt like he failed him. other than that, laurent didn’t want nicaise to have to re live anything through trials/deal with invasive questions, and if the case was reopened then that would be inevitable. nicaise’s motivation was his own love for laurent and not feeling like he could let laurent be in prison for him any longer if there was any chance he could do something about it.