#how does she always manage to disappoint me like my standards for her are on the floor and YET

[dracowars]

hi! i'd like to ask a one shot on fred weasley in which y/n is a pureblood slytherin who went from an enemies to lovers relationship with fred. lately she started feeling like she isn't enough for him and that she's disappointing her family with their secret affair. so she starts taking a distance from him and sinks into some kind of depression; she always suffered with self worth issues and confidence, always thinking she wouldn't be up to the standards her parents set for her. but she never showed it, not even to fred. he notices her change in behaviour and gets worried, so he decides to confront her and they end up having a huge and angsty argument.

thanks :)

define me | fred weasley

pairing: fred x syltherin!reader

word count: 1,9k

summary: where y/n feels like her relationship with fred is doomed

a/n: trying to go through all my requests in my holidays!! hope you enjoy this one <3

warnings: angst

universe: harry potter

„If that isn’t the most beautiful girl in the whole wide world right there!”, a cheerful voice calls out behind you, after you have just made your way out of the greenhouses from your Herbology class and in the direction of the castle. Rolling your eyes playfully, you turn to the origin of the voice and are immediately drawn into a tight hug that, admittedly, you did not see coming. Apparently the Weasley twins just finished their daily training session while you had to deal with a Venomous Tentacula.

“Stop it, Fred!”, you giggle softly as he begins to scatter soft kisses across your face while continuing to give you all the compliments that come to his mind, which his twin brother does not approve of either as his face kind of turns into a shade of green.

“Gross, get a room”, George chokes out, while you are not sure how much of it he is faking and what is actually real, but at least he manages to stop his brother with his words.

“Just don’t pay attention to him, he is just an annoying ringing in the ear and pretty jealous that his last date did not go as well”, Fred winks at you, causing you to laugh out loud. “How about we sneak out to the lake tonight? Just the two of us?”

“Sounds great”, you smile and gently kiss him, which George comments on with another gag. Running your hands over your boyfriend’s broad shoulders, you adjust his Quidditch uniform while grinning to yourself. “I think your brother wants to go and unfortunately, I have to go to Potions now.”

“Alright, see you tonight, my love”, Fred smiles, kissing you one last goodbye before the two of them wave you goodbye and disappear into the castle. Absorbed in your dreamy thoughts, you look after them and tuck a strand of hair behind your ear, but when you suddenly hear footsteps behind you, your posture stiffens and the voices you now hear make you shiver. These voices never mean anything good.

“Oh, how adorable! But what would Mommy and Daddy Y/L/N say if they knew their only daughter and heiress to their empire is dating a Weasley?”, Pansy Parkinson’s annoying voice says behind you, her words making your heart beat faster. You and Fred do not hide the fact that you are in a relationship, but you have always kept it low, especially in front of the Slytherins. Because each of them knows your family, and your family happens to be unaware of their daughters’ dishonorable actions, or, well, love interests.

“They always talk about you in such high tones, and they don’t even know that their daughter lies to their face every time, so cold and unscrupulous. A Gryffindor and a Slytherin? My parents would kick me out of Hogwarts in a heartbeat and never let me leave the house again”, Daphne Greengrass adds, a wicked grin on her lips that is only made worse by the fact that you do not have a counter.

Because they are right. It is the truth.

As the only child of the Y/L/N family, you have always been in the spotlight, but not in a good way. You have never been allowed to make mistakes or make your own decisions or live the way you want or hang out with the people you want. Business dinners and balls are all you knew for a long time, events where they could present their flagship daughter to the world. They never realized the pressure they put on you. Or they did but did not care about it.

“Leave me alone”, are the only puny words you can manage to get out before rushing to the safety of the building. Their judgmental looks burn into the back of your head and their words entice you to take a detour, not to your next lesson but to your common room in the Slytherin dungeon, where you lie down on your bed and do not get up until the next morning. While doing so, you completely forgot that you actually had plans with Fred in the evening and instead spent your time trying to avoid your parents’ looks from the family photo next to your bed. Without success, because you can clearly feel their disappointment and the consequences of your actions incredibly scare you, which is why you make a decision for your own sake.

Even if it means you have to break the heart of the boy who was always there for you when your family was not.

════════════

The numerous voices swirling around you just echo to you through a tunnel as you sit listlessly in front of your breakfast, your stomach heavy. You do not dare to raise your eyes for fear you might make eye contact with someone. Lonely, you sit at the end of the table, the other Slytherins paying little attention to the fact that one of them separates themselves from the group.

When a plate falls to the ground with a loud crash at a table next to you, shattering into many pieces, you startle and reflexively look in that direction. Which turns out to be a huge mistake, because your eyes meet Fred’s in a second, who is smiling at you from across the hall. He does not look the tiniest bit disappointed that you dumped him, he just seems happy that you are sitting here this morning. With the first of the day approaching, the first few students rise and scurry to the exit of the Great Hall, trying to make it to their classrooms in time.

Fred, who has not taken his eyes off you, gets up at the exact same moment you do. Noticing this, you quicken your steps and duck among the crowd of students that are gathering in the hallways. You ignore the fact that he calls after you before you fully disappear into the crowd and go straight to your lesson.

Relieved that you could manage to avoid him all day, you leave the room after class, your backpack over your shoulder and a book under your right arm. However, you do not expect Fred to be waiting for you in the hallway with his back against the wall, his arms crossed in front of his chest. Your eyes meet for a brief moment, and you immediately turn away, going in the other direction, but it is too late. If he did not notice before that you are avoiding him, he definitely noticed now when he runs after you, standing in front of you to block your way.

“Fred, I am in a hurry”, you say with your head down and walk past him, but he grabs your arms, lifting you off the ground briefly before placing you directly in front of him again. No more escape.

“Why are you avoiding me?”, he asks directly, which only makes you more insecure. Your trembling hands grip the book tighter, as if it could give you strength to get through what is about to come.

“I am not avoiding you, I just really don’t have time to-”

“Did I do something wrong?”, Fred asks worried and sad, making your heart ache even more. The fact that he immediately related all of it to himself does not make it any easier for you to say the next few words, but you know you have to.

“I don’t think this works, Fred”, you say emotionlessly, but your shaky voices gives your true feelings away. Still, the shock creeping up on his face is unbearable.

“Wait, wait.. What? What are you even talking about?”, he prompts, as if he did not quite understand what you were saying, even though you both know perfectly what you just hinted at.

“I am just saying.. We are too different. You are a Gryffindor, I am Slytherin. It just doesn’t fit”, you explain and as soon as the words leave your lips realize that this will not be the point that ultimately convinces him. Because it sounds stupid. Because it is stupid.

“Who put such nonsense in your head?”, Fred laughs, but there is no humor in it. “Was it that Pansy Parkinson again? What did she say this time-”

“No, Fred. It’s my decision, no one told me anything and if you will excuse me now, I have classes that require my presence”, you brush him off and due to the complete state of shock Fred is in right now, he lets you pass him. He does not notice the tear that runs down your cheek as you do.

“So I am supposed to just accept that you are breaking up with me, leaving me without any proper explanation?”, he finally calls after you in a loud voice. But what makes you stop are not his words, but the sadness that resonates with them. Your heart breaks a bit more at the sound.

“Fred..”

“You dumped me yesterday without telling me. I didn’t know where you were, I didn’t know what happened or if you were okay. I was worried sick just for you to ignore me the whole day and then tell me it is over between us?”, he says, hurt and confused by what is happening at the moment, unable to understand why you are suddenly feeling this way. “I am sorry, but I don’t think what you are saying is true.”

“How so? Because I always lie?”

“No, that is not-”

“Alright, Fred, I got it. Everything always has to be up to you”, you claim, getting too involved in this arising argument. If he had just accepted your decision, it would have been less painful for both of you.

“It is not fair, Y/N. If you really want to end this between us, then I also deserve to know why”, Fred replies and takes another step towards you so that you can see the pain in his eyes even better now. His gaze holds yours and when you think you see tears forming in his eyes, all damns in you break all of a sudden.

“You want to know why?! Because I am no good for you, Fred. I am a bad person. We should not even exist as a couple because it is doomed to fail anyway! I am not allowed to associate with the people I like and choose myself. I am and always have been the pride of my family and I will not let them down just because I am with someone like you-”

You cannot finish your emotional outburst as Fred pulls you into the bone-crushing hug you so desperately needed, wrapping his arms around your waist tightly. He runs his hand over your hair, the back of your head, and your back in an attempt to calm you down and stop your tears.

“Who your parents are doesn’t define who you are, Y/N”, he whispers softly in your ear as you violently sob in his strong arms, that hold you upright to not let you sink on the cold floor. “You are the most incredible witch I have ever met, and your parents must be so incredibly proud of you, there is no other way. You have always done what they asked of you, but it is finally time for you to be selfish. I won’t lose you over this. I won’t allow it.”

Fred’s words patch your heart back together in seconds and make it pound faster than ever. You know he is right and you do not have to bow to your parents’ demands anymore. But there is still a long way to go before you can fully accept yourself as you are and be proud of yourself at the same time. Fred will be with you every step on this journey.

“Maybe our relationship isn’t the end, but it’s the beginning.”

[babydollmarauders]

MEDIA MANAGEMENT — JACK HUGHES (PART EIGHT)

1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5 - 5.5 - 6 - 7 - 8

notes: i feel that this chapter is very underwhelming bc i wrote it at work 🫡 so sorry

y/ndevils00

liked by siegenthaler34, nicohischier, and 32,542 others

y/ndevils00 hi people! thank you for tuning into tonight’s (brief) postgame recap! this is a very sad night for my favorite boys, as we lost 6-1 to the winnipeg jets.

we had a meager three penalties tonight!

starting off with erik, who has banned me from making any more name puns (boring!). erik got a penalty for tripping, bringing him up to an astounding 47 penalty minutes this season!

next, i’d like to bring your attention to jack’s picture. nothing special, i just like it.

and then, of course, we have my boyfriend again; chewing on his glove like a rabid little chihuahua <3

the next penalty was from siegs at the very end of the 1st period for high sticking! i had dawson do my dirty work for me and give him a very stern talking to during intermission!

next up, we have hershey bar looking very displeased, and i can’t say i blame him!

we got a little over halfway through 3rd period before we got the final penalty from the newest swiss, timo for holding! he took a lesson from my very rude boyfriend and hid behind the stanchion. i very much did not like that.

however, our lone goal came with SECONDS left in the game, scored by the captain himself! who still looked very disappointed to say the least.

and lastly, bff number 1 says i should apologize to bff number 2 for dissing him last night 😒 so we have a picture of marinara and i’m supposed to tell him that i’m proud of him (i’m not sure what for though? he didn’t do anything 🤷‍♀️)

tagged ehaula, jackhughes, siegenthaler34, nicohischier, tmeier96 and john.marino97

ehaula i know i asked you to stop but now it feels weird without the name puns

y/ndevils00 so….

ehaula so you can do the puns

y/ndevils00 OH THANK GOD! do you realize how hard it was to withhold from them?! it was torture!

ehaula it’s been one post

user18 i’ve become so used to the “haula” puns that i forgot who erik was for a second

siegenthaler34 i made my y/n post debut!

y/ndevils00 it could’ve been for a better reason…

nicohischier you weren’t even there but you still got 2 horrible photos of me

y/ndevils00 i have spies everywhere

nicohischier what does that even mean?

y/ndevils00 guess you’ll never know

jackhughes why?

y/ndevils00 why what? why do i praise you when you don’t appreciate it? i don’t know, you would think i would’ve learned by now

jackhughes no. why the 2nd picture? why do you like it? why call me a chihuahua?

y/ndevils00 i like it. your eyes are so pretty and blue. because you’re small and scrappy and chew on everything.

jackhughes i’m 5’11

y/ndevils00 sure you are honey

dougieham if you went just based off y/n’s posts and comments, i don’t think anyone would ever guess that her and marino are genuinely best friends

y/ndevils00 it’s called tough love <3

john.marino97 she’s evil

trevorzegras i’m forever grateful that i’m a duck so i’ll never be subjected to the torture you put these guys through

y/ndevils00 there’s always next trade szn 😈

trevorzegras the ducks would never trade me

y/ndevils00 i have friends in high places… watch your back zegras

tmeier96 hughesy told me to sit there before i went into the box. he didn’t tell me why but i guess now i know

y/ndevils00 @/jackhughes do you not love me? do you not want to see me happy? this is why luke is my favorite

jackhughes @/y/ndevils00 luke is your WHAT?

lhughes_06 @/y/ndevils00 i feel so special! thank you y/n/n!

john.marino97 i have multiple questions. starting with: why is DAWSON bff number 1? and i didn’t get a penalty so you could be proud of me for that???

y/ndevils00 i like him better. and that’s very true, however you didn’t get a goal or an assist either so….

dawson1417 translation: y/n holds you to a higher standard because she knows how well you play. she knows you can do better but she’s proud of you regardless.

john.marino97 @/dawson1417 well why doesn’t she say it like that? that’s kinda sweet!

y/ndevils00 emotions are for the weak

john.marino97 @/jackhughes i think your girlfriend is broken

jackhughes she just likes to seem tough on the internet. watch this 👀

jackhughes @/y/ndevils00 i love you so much sweet girl ❤️ i can’t wait to get home

y/ndevils00 @/jackhughes i love you too, now come home!

jackhughes @/y/ndevils00 aww you miss me?

y/ndevils00 @/jackhughes sure, but also you lost your game which means you lost the bet and you have to give LSH her bath <3

[theworldoffostering]

Back to old habits.

I was so down this morning that I convinced myself a Diet Coke and McGriddle at 9:30 would make me feel better. It did so maybe that was a good call on my part? I’ll probably feel differently when I have to enter it into my daily nutrition app tonight and meet with my trainer tomorrow.

I’m buried with grading at work. It’s not going poorly; I’m just a little overwhelmed with all of the responsibilities between work and home.

I love October but it’s always insane with work and I really just want to enjoy fall with my family and not work 6-7 days because I’m working and homeschooling and stay-at-home momming all while working.

Today I had to have contact with my endocrinologist and I realized it just takes everything out of me because I know up front I’m going to have to advocate more myself and it’s going to be so much work. That means I put off talking to them and today it went exactly as I expected. The nurse called. She went through my two medications. Asserted I was not taking them as prescribed (I am; she had it wrong on her end), and then told me I was basically being “over treated” which means I’m taking too much Synthroid. Every time they drop me on the Synthroid, I feel like crap so I’d definitely rather take more than less (and by more I mean I’d prefer to take .137 instead of the .112 currently prescribed which has me breaking out with acne and my hair falling out).

I sent a follow up email after talking to her and told her I was taking the medication as perceived and she must have been working with old data. I also told them to stop invalidating how I actually feel. This is the nonstop fight I have with this field in general. They want to treat my lab numbers, not me or how I’m feeling. It. Is. Maddening. And also, exhausting.

So far this week, I’m fighting standardized testing at the schools (opting my kids out but getting lots of pushback), recoiling over the email sent to parents regarding the school lockdown drills (the email said something about how we communicated to students that they were safe at school during an active shooter drill—does that seem tone deaf or is it just me?), and managing allll of the things.

DH is waiting to hear the outcome for a job he interviewed for last week, and lined up an interview for next week. In the interim, he’s subbing near daily and squeezing in neuropsych testing tomorrow.

I’m so tired, and decided October was when I was going to meet with my trainer again after not seeing her since July-ish. So far she’s trying to get me to walk a mile a day and clean up my diet. I’m finding both difficult which is disappointing given that I trained to run a 5k last October.

C’est la vie, right?

[odekirk]

is there something I missed with the Kim earring flashback? I only saw it once but I didn't look deeper yet at what it conveys about her. I just remember it as being kinda off because I always liked Jimmy being her introduction to scamming others

re: your last sentence, that's kind of my quibble with people who say that that scene = slippin' kimmy. shoplifting is a bit of rule-breaking, sure, but it's not "scamming" of the same caliber that she and jimmy engage in now. shoplifting is just taking something and walking out while trying not to get caught, whereas to me, the defining feature of their "scamming" is the manipulation of people into giving them what they want. (in fact, with a lot of jimmy and marco's scams in particular, the beauty of them is that their mark walks away feeling like they're getting away with something.)

kim isn't scamming in the flashback, she's just shoplifting, and is clearly uncomfortable when caught. kim's mom, on the other hand, is much closer to mcwexler-style scamming when she gives her whole performance to the store manager, resulting in him letting kim go with only a warning and her walking out of the store with the earrings anyway.

but kim's reaction to her mom's scamming is not positive. she initially reaches out to take her mom's hand when they're walking out of the store, seeking maternal comfort, but then yanks her hand away when her mom starts laughing and she realizes that the whole thing was a performance. she doesn't react to her mom's impressed "i didn't know you had it in you," nor to her "relax, you got away with it." personally i had two main takeaways from this:

i actually don't view this scene in itself as an illustration of kim's "dark side"; on the contrary, i think there is a heartbreaking innocence to the scene. she's just a kid who did something wrong and is, initially, clearly fearful of punishment; but then when that punishment doesn't come, she is actually hurt, because it is just another disappointment coming from her irresponsible and seemingly callous mother. there is nothing particularly telling about a kid shoplifting a small item, but there is something very telling and extremely sad about a kid shutting down in the face of their parent's abnormal and immature behavior.

ok, having just defended young kim from the popular interpretation that this scene reveals her "dark side," now let me explain how this does reveal adult kim's dark side. because of course, even though she worked hard for many years trying to get away from home and away from her old life and build a new life as an attorney at a big blue law firm where she works hard and plays by the rules to get ahead, she eventually starts scamming with jimmy. real scamming, not just shoplifting. sometimes they scam to make a rich d-bag pay for hundreds of dollars of tequila, and sometimes they scam to give her bosses a slightly larger bank branch, and sometimes they scam to ruin lives. throughout it all, it seems that kim only really takes issue with something if she isn't in on it. this is illustrated when she participates in the entire scheme against kevin, then nearly breaks up with jimmy forever when he initiates the final confrontation without her knowledge/approval.

in the flashback with young jimmy, he has a seemingly inborn (precocious, at the very least) awareness of others' duplicity. young kim doesn't. young kim is taken in by her mother's performance, just as she gets taken in by jimmy's performances a few times throughout the series, and is then made to feel like a fool afterwards. i wouldn't be surprised if that brings particular hurt to those moments for adult kim - she isn't just experiencing the standard betrayal of having been lied to, she's specifically feeling like a little kid again, powerless.

and conversely, doing that to others makes her feel powerful. and that's the dark side. that's the arrangement she has with jimmy: we can play anybody but each other. we can make anybody the sucker but each other. i'm sure it will all end well

[readingrobin]

Since I was caught up in the Magical Readathon this month, it gave me the opportunity to pick up my pace a bit reading-wise. Managed to get into those sweet double digits when it came to how much I read and the majority of them were great. It started off on a high note, but I think by the end I was getting into some very lukewarm reads. Nothing too terrible, since I didn't manage to DNF anything this month, but it's always disappointing to end a month with a whimper rather than a bang.

Total Books Reads: 11

Total Pages Read: 3,520

Books Read:

Murder for the Modern Girl by Kendall Kulper (3.5/5) (Review)

All the Stars and Teeth by Adalyn Grace (3/5) - A sea faring journey is just what I needed to get in the mood for a summer that feels not too far off. I will say, this book definitely lives up to its promise of adventure, due to its tense, bloody action and introduction to a world with a interesting magic system, though I did find myself constantly confused and unable to really visualize soul magic. I think the book's greatest strength is its setting, where each island holds its own kind of magic and traits. Though we didn't see every island, I'm sure the rest will be left for the sequel to explore, there was enough to sate me for this particular journey.

When it comes to our main crew, I think I have to echo some other reviews by saying Amora comes off as the least interesting. Bastian has his charm and inner turmoil that he tries to keep behind a mischievous facade, Ferrick, his foil, a bit more straight laced and focused, while also having the neat featuring of regrowing limbs, and Vataea, a mermaid with a sultry, yet scary strength. And Amora is…just there. She's the princess, our main character, the one who believes she alone can save the kingdom, which somewhat makes me feel like she views her crew as nothing more than lackeys and sidekicks who are but tools to help her get to each destination while she does the most self-sacrifical work. I know she's meant to be a stubborn royal who was most likely raised to believe so, but it still doesn't exactly put her in the best light to the reader.

The writing itself kept my attention, but the plot had the standard twists and formula one finds in most YA fantasy. Nothing wrong with a formulaic plot, but there should be some sort of window dressing or aesthetic that keeps it from fading into the background with all the rest like it. My mind was starting to expect certain plot beats, only to go "ah, there it is" when the shoe inevitably dropped.

Mage and the Endless Unknown by SJ Miller (4/5) - Not gonna lie, this graphic novel gets rough. If you're up for seeing a little mage constantly facing some sort of traumatizing event from the terrifying creatures he meets on his travels, well, this'll certainly do it for you. The artist really has a knack for drawing unnerving, rigidly detailed creatures that give off a Junji Ito vibe. The contrast of the amount of gore, violence, and disturbing visuals offset the more friendly and cartoonish looking mage, giving the idea that one of these things doesn't belong in this setting. Though upsetting at points, there is a glimmer of hope to this comic, one that offers a sense of peace and rest. The comic does have a physical release coming out, but you can read it now on the magecomic website.

Elatsoe by Darcie Little Badger (4/5) - It's odd how I went into this book having both some expectations, mostly due my friends and everyone else lauding it extensively, and no expectations at all. This pretty much happens whenever I'm 3-5 years behind reading the latest hot titles. But Elatsoe really does live up to its clout. The world has a somewhat normalized take on the paranormal, where vampires, or "cursed" individuals, magic users, and faeries are a known part of the world, interacting with society with life pretty much going on as normal. Well, aside from the string of mysterious deaths that seem to linger around a small town in the middle of Texas. It presents a setting that is both familiar and yet holds a bit of intrigue in a sort of alternate Earth containing all the history of our world with just some extra bits.

I loved the incorporation of Lipan Apache culture in the story, giving it an identity all its own and more weight to its events. The theme of oppressors actively displacing and sacrificing the oppressed to survive and further their own needs will always be haunting, especially when tied to the history between colonizers and indigenous peoples. Little Badger gives an equal amount of lamentation for the crimes of the past and present, while also celebrating the endurance of culture and its teachings that are passed down throughout the ages. 

A big plus for making Ellie's asexuality just a casual feature of her character rather than making it an entire plot point. As an asexual person, I'm glad to have any normalizing representation that's more than an entire story where the protagonist has to repeatedly defend and validate their sexuality to other people. Here, it's just a part of her being, no big thing, and that's the way it should be. 

Nettle & Bone by T. Kingfisher (4/5) - I've been hearing a lot of good things about T. Kingfisher and how I would really jive with her work. Well, diving into a story with a main character that has trouble really understanding the world around her while also bringing together a group that may qualify as one of the odder found families definitely wins me over.

I think what really endears me to this book is how much I appreciate Marra as a character. I love how, despite how constantly and profoundly out of her depth she is, she is still determined to do anything to protect her family. That, while she is surrounded by people who, on the surface, are more exemplary and powerful, she is capable of working marvels. What makes her stand out among other royal heroines is that her abilities are not tied to skills she earned through her title or some kind of destiny, but a certain domesticity she finds comfort in and developed all by herself. Marra is a self made woman, wanting to make herself of use to others instead of sitting around, waiting to be used as a chess piece. I think there's something amiable in depicting a sort of power in the mundane, that, with enough determination and love, could be as strong as any weapon or magic.

The writing style makes it so immersive as a dark fairy tale. Kingfisher always nails the tone of a scene, whether it be unnerving, reflective, mysterious, or tinged with a hint of humor. There were some elements I think could have been expanded upon. I wish we got a little bit more characterization from Prince Vorling other than what we got as second hand accounts. Most of the time, he never really felt like a threat, just something far away and not really tangible, despite his lingering marks on Kania. I really wanted to see more of that Goblin Market as well. So very ripe with fantastical possibilities.

The Moth Keeper by K. O'Neill (3/5) - O'Neill, throughout all of their work, knows what it takes to make each of their worlds atmospheric, engaging, and magical. It's mainly through their artwork, which is just totally immaculate here. The night scenes, will covered in a dark, expansive sky, still have a certain glow about them, coming from Anya's lantern and the ethereal presence of the moths. The adding of animal characteristics to the characters also bring about a certain kind of charm, though I wonder if there was a purpose behind these designs beyond aesthetic. The art itself make it worth checking out, but I don't think it ultimately saves a story that seems somewhat empty.

I think, as I was reading, I never felt totally ingrained in the world. It seemed almost aloof in nature, not really explaining certain things or leaving other elements up to interpretation. I mentioned the story seeming somewhat empty, which kind of makes sense for one that has a desert setting and deals with feelings of loneliness in a community and isolating yourself. But there's not really much else that compensates for that space, not in depth worldbuilding or interesting character dynamics. The message is a reassuring one, that your responsibilities in your community shouldn't be a source of isolation, but rather a way to get closer to them. It's a simple, reflective story, which is fine, but I think I was expecting more out of the premise.

The Cloud Roads by Martha Wells (3/5) - Wells certainly has a penchant for emotionally aloof and antisocially prone main characters, but I'm all for it. In a world devoid of humans and populated by a slew of humanoid creatures, the story offers a setting completely alien to the reader, which leaves a lot up to the imagination. At first, it was somewhat difficult for me to properly visualize all the differences between the species. The book already has an appendix for how to differentiate between the Raksura and the Fell, so it would have been helpful to have another that focused on the other races in the world.

I don't know if this is just me, but I thought that it was somewhat odd that, despite possibly coming from a similar ancestor, the Raksura are an all sentient, rational thinking race among all their classes, but the Fell are a mostly animalistic hivemind species aside from their rulers. It kind of made for a messy parallel and I think was to make the reader empathize more with the Raksura and showcase the Fell as entirely evil with no capability for civility. I suppose it certainly helps side with the heroes as the two constantly slaughter each other, but it makes for a pretty boring antagonist that is simply evil scary monsters just because. The story seemed like it had a few opportunities to go deeper than that, as Cloud has a history with them and Wells has shown that she is capable of more nuanced storytelling, but fell off about halfway through.

I wish there had been more time set aside for Cloud to truly learn about his people and reflect on his place in their society before they thrust him into the hierarchical issues and the disputes with the Fell. Cloud has only just found his people for the first time after losing his mother and siblings as a child, wandering alone and hiding what he is from others, and I don't think we get a lot of him reflecting on what that truly means. Also, imagine going through all that, and discovering that your main purpose in that society was basically to breed. Again, may just be a personal thing, but I know that would certainly lead to an existential dilemma for me. Personally, I'm not a fan of society structures as, "you're born as this class, so obviously you must serve that role forever" seems too dystopic for my tastes. Wells subverts this with Chime in a way, but again, doesn't really tap the full ramifications or intrigue behind it.

The Sandman Universe: Nightmare Country Vol 1. by James Tynion IV and Lisandro Estherran (5/5) - It's very rare that I find a Sandman-affiliated comic that I don't like really. I love this world and all the terrifying sorts of beings that live within it. I know Tynion more for his young adult Wynd series, but know that he's very capable at writing horror and Nightmare Country certainly proves it. This comic takes Sandman back to its horror roots, following the Corinthian as a being with teeth for eyes other than him has been stalking a woman in her waking life for some time now. This volume serves as a good setup to the story, getting all our main players in, bringing back some familiar faces and introducing some new ones. With how the story ended, I'm really interested to see where exactly it's going to go.

Vespertine by Margaret Rogerson (4/5) (Review)

Labyrinth Lost by Zoraida Córdova (3/5) - I feel very lukewarm about Labyrinth Lost. It wasn't a particularly bad book, I think it's just one where I've read similar stories before and they were told in a way that was more gripping to me. I didn't really connect with the simpler writing style, or connect with any of the characters. I think the only elements that I was really interested in was the magic system and the environments of Los Lagos. I'm always a fan of the trope of the tempting feast, the one meant to lure you in with delicious food and fascinating company, only to trick you into eating dirt and keep you there forever. It's a portal fantasy staple, really. 

It may be just a me thing since I was breezing through this book so quickly, but the pacing felt a bit off at times, with the action starting and stopping so often, especially towards the end. I think what really threw me off about the group is that we don't really have a strong trio of characters between Alex, Nova, and Rishi. Usually in fantasies that usually follow a group of three characters off on a typical quest, there's some cohesion to them. They may get off to a rocky start, but eventually they really start to work well as a unit and become stronger for it. Here, the group doesn't really feel like a stable triangle, as they usually range from being incredibly snarky and antagonistic towards each other (Alex and Nova at the start, then Rishi taking over that job from Alex as the two start to get on better) or being completely devoted to each other (Nova warming up to Alex, as well as Rishi being a constant supportive force and that's it). I wish Rishi got some kind of quality that made her more of an asset to the team other than Alex's best friend and love interest. She literally just fell into the portal to Los Lagos after Alex on accident and really doesn't serve a function other than backing Alex up. It doesn't make her that memorable as a character and it's a little disappointing.

I know there's plot reasons as to why they don't really feel like a great team but the twist towards the end probably would have hit a lot harder if they were. 

Other than that, the family dynamic was a great element of the story, which makes it a bummer that we don't really see more of them. I know the sequel follows Alex's sister, which would probably focus a bit more on that aspect, but I don't think I gel enough with this writer or the overall story to continue.

The Book Woman of Troublesome Creek by Kim Michele Richardson (2/5) - Though I may not have liked this book very much, I will say that I appreciate that it introduced me to an interesting aspect of history that I had not known before, such as the Pack Horse project and the Blue Fugates family. I'm a real big fan of pieces of history that slips through the cracks and lead the way for improvement in societies that were disadvantaged, which was one of the aims of the Pack Horse project. To know the dedication of librarians in this context, to be introduced how they would travel in dangerous conditions to bring people books and magazines that would either give them a relief for their hard lives, or help them learn new skills that would help them contribute in new ways to their families or communities was a much welcome lesson.

That's probably the only praise I can really give this book. I wasn't a fan of how this book centered on the constant sense of tragedy that lingers around Cussy May. It seems that, no matter how little good she experiences, she can't hold onto it for long or it's overshadows by the many, many horrible things that happen to her. Numerous sexual assaults, medical assault, losing so many people. At some point, it almost feels manipulative that we're constantly supposed to feel bad for Cussy, but at some point it gets to be too much to take seriously. Did I feel anger at all the injustice she faced? Sure, as any rational minded person would. But when the only thing your character experiences is constant hardship without any slack, it gets to be real repetitive and boring. And that ending was just the cherry out a cake made out of frustration and emotional exhaustion.

When it came to the author's treatment of race in the book, I'm just gonna say that it's a bit messy in certain scenarios. Framing Cussy, a person with blue skin, as someone who is somehow treated more poorly than the few black people in the community, was, I don't know, probably not a great choice. The scene with the doctor's Jamaican servant (you can tell she's Jamaican because the author makes sure to lean hard into the accent), who doesn't even let Cussy into his house or provide her a drink when he asks her to, just felt a little tone deaf. 

While I'm glad this books highlights the importance of literature within a community, as well as how wealth and information disparity leads people to become more disadvantaged, misinformed, and generally have harder ways of living, its tone and content just felt a little overbearing.

Average Rating: 3.5/5

[threeopennames]

14072022: T13

Chapter 13: Confections

Hey, finally a chapter where I don’t have to nitpick for stuff to talk about because it’s actually got content! I’ll eschew the character profiles just for a rambling discussion this time, because I think there’s a lot of stuff here to cover and splitting it up won’t do much good. The basic plot as usual is very thin: Isabella and Edward go hiking, Edward reveals a bunch of stuff we kind of already knew, they grope each other for a bit and head home before it gets too awkward.

This stands out as a far better chapter than any of the previous ones. The author clearly understood this to be a pivotal moment in the story and spent time polishing it. Some of the usual transgressions are present, like how the author somehow still manages to work in some petty whining about Jessica, but over half of it is decently paced and written. I can overlook the repetitive dialog parts that go over material we already knew, and the parts that were probably way too overexplained, because the awkward rubbing and pawing and tantruming that happens gets across the whole hormonal teenage romance thing pretty well. I like the weird-ass groping (not literal ass groping, I assume that happens in the second book) because the intention is to present a visceral level of intimacy they’re now sharing. I like the random zipping around and breaking stuff Edward does- it shows he’s legitimately dangerous and terrifying, even to the point he basically openly threatens Isabella by saying something like ‘you couldn’t even fight back if you wanted’. There’s a lot of pieces presented here that could have been the groundwork for some really interesting explorations about power in relationships or predatory behavior or unhealthy obsessions or what have you. The presentation can’t be faulted!

Now the actual MEANING behind all of that is still repulsive to me. It’s basically the ‘implication of danger’ sketch from Always Sunny, except played completely straight. Maybe you’re into that thought! The execution is on point, and if this sort of thing gets your going I could totally understand being taken in by the narrative. Credit where credit is due the author understood the points that needed to be hit at this moment in the story and they did not disappoint. 

Now, that being said, there’s a whole host of underlying issues that make me incredibly uncomfortable with the premise and implications of what is happening, and I’ll try to roll through them as they jump up in my head rather than in any particular order. The first thing that stuck out to me is that Edward refers to all the fellow students at school as ‘children’. I don’t necessarily disagree with that assessment, but what’s left unsaid is that he’s basically admitting (even though we don’t know his true age yet) that he’s in love with a child. Isabella is most certainly a child in numerous ways but, okay, whatever, fine, let’s just say she’s an adult because I don’t even want to go down the opposite path of discussion. Even though Edward basically says she’s a child, and everything we know about her personality suggests she is a child, and the way everyone treats her and the way she acts is how a child would behave, we’re not going to go there. Isabella is an adult for all intents and purposes moving forward. A really, really, unreliable adult, but an adult nonetheless. 

The next absolutely insane idea that gets thrown at us this chapter is that Edward was overcome by a lust/love for Isabella from the moment he saw her. This is obviously intended to parallel Isabella’s immediate feelings of lust towards Edward but the double standard that jumps out is hard to ignore so easily. Edward makes it clear (as the author is likely trying to) that his immediate desire to, uh, drag her away and have his way with her is a bad thing. Edward says his desire to violate her is bad. Isabella says that she’d be totally cool with getting murdered by Edward but even so, she also admits that it’s not great he feels that way. Everyone is on the same page here. Isabella even spares what might be the first kind thought she has towards another human being in the story by admitting that, as much as she’d like to be killed by Edward, having him murder other people in the process was kind of sad to think about. So far so good (kind of), right? But the flip side of this isn’t examined at all, that is to say, Isabella’s instinctual lust for Edward is just kind of...ignored. Edward mentions once that his natural predator magnetism or whatever is what draws Isabella to him, but there’s nothing wrong or worth considering from Isabella’s barely constrained attraction to Edward. If anything it's treated as a good thing: Isabella is just so happy and full of life now that she’s given over entirely to her lustful feelings for Edwards hot bod! In fact, her denial of that lust is treated as bad- she repeatedly mentions how she couldn’t possibly live without Edward and how much being away from him hurts her. The message here is simple: Edward lust: bad. Isabella lust: good. 

It’s not my place to tell anyone how to do romance, of course. You do you, as long as all parties consent and all that. But the story is trying to have its cake and eat it too. Edward is brave and attractive and it’s just so romantic how he resists his urges to be with Isabella- oh, but it’s also just so brave and attractive and romantic how Isabella does the exact opposite. There’s not a message here except a really unpleasant one about how the author views dominance and power in a relationship. It was bad enough that we’re supposed to treat Edward’s ‘I wanted to **** you and leave your body in the forest but didn’t because it’d make me look bad’ confession as romantic, but then we’re being told that Isabella feels BAD because she makes him feel that way? Like, she was asking for it, or something? She should have dressed more modestly and maybe not exposed her neck so much to help Edward keep those impulses in check? Is that really the type of love story you want to present to your readers? 

I might have been fine with all this as like, a clear representation of an unhealthy relationship or an young/naive view on a first romance or as a legitimate attempt at horror, but there’s no point in the chapter you’re really expecting Edward to hurt Isabella. Isabella herself (IE, the author) repeatedly states how good and right everything is, so that the reader is never left thinking maybe there’s some nuance or gray area here. Edward is noble and brave for not violating Isabella’s body and Isabella is noble and brave for falling in love with an angry superhuman that doesn’t respect her autonomy and values his image above the lives of others. There’s one throw-away line where Edward says he would hate to see her dead, but most of his confession is about how he tried to stay strong to not ruin the reputation of his family. He never says ‘I didn’t kill you because it would be wrong’. He doesn’t kill her because he wants to bang her. That’s not noble! That’s just his dick having more voting power than his stomach.

So this whole ‘love’ confession scene is absolutely bonkers, independent of how well it is written. If I was approached by someone who I considered ridiculously over the top attractive, and they told me ‘by the way, I wanted to kill you (and still do actually) and could do so easily at any time of my choosing, but I didn’t/won’t because I want to date you’, my first response would not be giddy enthusiasm.To end on a positive note, Edward does mention something I didn’t think about that I’ll admit does, kind of, explain his attraction to her in a non-gross way. Isabella didn’t tell everyone he was a vampire, despite having the opportunity too, which showed that she put trust in him. I’d argue that he threatened her pretty clearly that if she talked there would be consequences, and that almost everyone was infatuated with Edward and would probably do what he asked regardless, but let’s just take him at his word and assume that only Isabella had the mental fortitude to...lie and stay quiet, or whatever. Someone willing to stick their neck out for you (granted, someone whose life you just saved) is an admirable trait, so if that’s all it took, then okay, Edward likes Isabella for something other than her body/scent/blood. In the same way, Isabella’s attraction towards Edward making her feel safe (for some reason) is nice to see in the sea of pure physical attraction she gushes every other sentence, because it means there’s something other than his supernatural mojo that draws her towards him. It’s small, it’s barely mentioned, it’s practically nothing, but it is a crumb of relatable content I can point to and say ‘see, it’s not ALL superficial attraction!’

The chapter ends with Edward harassing Isabella into giving him the keys to her car, because of course it does. 

[lettuce-seize-the-day]

my mother.....

[raineydays411]

My Father's daughter pt 3

Tony Stark x daughter!reader

Summary: Back at the Tower, Y/n has a talk with Pepper.

a/n: ohhh another part finished!! some new characters will be revealed next part and i’m so great full for @social-media-imagines-by-me fir helping me create them💕💕

You were furious.

You stormed into your room and slammed the door, finding satisfaction in the loud bang it produced. You then ripped through your drawers and closet, pulling on some work out clothes and some gloves. You then marched out of the room, slamming the door again, startling Sam and Bucky who happened to be passing by.

"Geez kid, slam it a little harder I don't think it fell off the hinges yet." Sam jokes, but you were in no joking mood so you swirled around with fire in your eyes.

"You okay doll?" Bucky softly asks, pushing a frightened Sam to the side. You sigh, knowing it's not fair to take out your anger on them.

"Sorry Sam, it's just...my biological mom is here and wants me to move in with her."

"Oh..." Bucky says, not good with things like this, " Do you want me to like...kill her or..."

"NO" You laugh, " It's just I haven't seen her in nine years and she has the audacity to come up here like it's nothing?!"

Your anger returns, " She thinks that just because she pushed me out of her vagina"

The two men cringe at the words

"That she can just claim me? That's not how it works!" You shout, " And, she brought her fucking husband. The man she left us for! Who does that?!"

Bucky looks at Sam, mentally asking him what they should do. Sam just rolls his eyes and turns back to you.

"Come on kid, it looks like you wanna punch something."

and with that he lead you to the training room where Steve was training with Peter.

"Come on queens, you gotta stay on your feet" Steve k=jokes as he, again, trips Peter.

"Mr. Rogers, do you think we should take a break?" Peter pants.

You stride pass them, not bothering to say hi. They look at Sam and Bucky for an explanation and just get a shake of the head.

"Hey Y/n that's my punching" Steve started to say when he saw you throw a hard punch to the bag, "Nevermind..."

You ignore the group behind you, opting to pummel the poor punching bag in front of you.

Your mind flashes back to your mother and her words.

"A girl needs her mother"

*punch*

"Oh petal I wanted to call"

*punch* *punch*

"Come to Gotham. Meet your siblings!"

*BANG*

You look down to see the punching bag flew off the hook and is spilling sand on the floor. You were confused, as you knew you weren't strong enough to do that, not even when you were angry.

"Wow, I guess Cap didn't secure that hook again."

You jump, not expecting someone to be there, as you heard Sam, Bucky, Steve, and Peter leave. You turn to see Pepper there looking at the bag in surprise. You sigh, stepping away from the mess and taking off your gloves. You make your way to the bench and take a swig of water.

"Did you need something Pep?" You ask, avoiding eye contact.

"Well, i was just wondering if my kid was okay. But given the fact that you punched that bag like it would restore your honor.."

You knew you shouldn't have showed her Avatar.

"I'm assuming your not." She finishes.

You give her a half smile, looking down at your hands.

"Y/n" She says, " Talk to me."

You finally speak, "Why now?"

Pepper frowns, understanding that small phrase, ' I don't know."

"She's not my mother." You state, " She...she might have been once but now?"

Pepper nods," I love you."

You smile, the words reassuring you, " I love you too Pep."

"Come on, your messing up your manicure." She says with a smile, standing and extending a hand towards you. You feel your demnor soften and your mood lighten. Pepper always managed to make you feel better.

"Yeah okay..thanks." You say, taking her hand and letting her pull you from the bench, " Are you hungry? Cause I am>"

"Y/n we just ate!"

"Like an hour ago"

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Days went by and you hadn't heard a peep from Christine. It was like she went off to lick her wounds and just decided not to reach out again.

Which didn't bother you one bit.

But apparently the universe wanted to fuck with you because when you came home from a day out with Peter, there was your mother, Bruce Wayne, and all six million of her fucking kids sitting on the couch.

"What the fuck?" You say causing the attention to turn to you.

"Language" Peter says, You smile softly at him before then turning to glare at Tony.

"Don't look at me, it was your moth-uh Peppers idea." Tony stumbled, looking rather uncomfortable sharing a drink with the man that his...wife? girlfriend?... whatever she was left him for.

"Pep what?" You asking, softening your glare because you'd be damned if you disrespected her.

"I just think it'd be best if we clear the air and get everything out on the table." Pepper said in that tone she uses when she's dealing with difficult people or the press. You called it her CEO tone.

"Now, go take your bags upstairs and wash up. And I'll pretend that you aren't an hour late"

"It was Peter's idea..." You mumbled and walking to the stairs that lead to the bed rooms.

"It was not!" Peter shouts following you to the rooms to help with the bags.

Christine watched as her daughter walked out of the room, playfully arguing with Peter. It was as if she were a whole different person, carefree and playful. Totally different from when she was glaring and stiff when talking to her. It broke her heart hearing Tony refer to Pepper as her Mother rather than Christine. But what did she expect?

Damian scoffed catching her attention, "Mother I do not see why you've dragged us here, that girl didn't even acknowledge us."

"Damian, enough" Bruce said, not looking away from his awkward conversation with Tony.

"Gee if only I could do that with our kids." Tony mutters into his drink.

"Does Y/n argue often?" Bruce asks trying to engage in conversation.

Tony laughs before fondly speaking, " Sort of. She isn't the type to back down when she thinks something is right. There was this one time I caught her arguing with one of my business partners about his "condescending tone and misogynistic attitude"."

""And did she apologize after?"

"Hell no. She glared at me and told me apologizing just for his ego would be demeaning her experiences as a woman. Although to be fair he was an asshole."

Bruce chuckles, " She sounds like a well rounded young woman. How old was she then?"

"Ah about 10, it was funny seeing this little girl argue in a Justin Bieber shirt argue about the patriarchy with a full grown man."

Bruce and Tony shared a laugh, picturing the scene.

"You must be very proud of her." Bruce mentions after they quieted down. Tony let a small smile escape.

" I am. She's had a rough life, and I..." Tony trails off, " She means everything to me. Without her...I don't think I'd be the same person I am today."

And with that, Tony downed his drink and stood, " Want another?"

Bruce smiled and accepted, watching Tony leave. He can tell that the man was close to his daughter. A bond that formed due to a loss, they both grew from it and grew closer. He understood, thinking about his own children.

Pepper and Christine were having a somewhat similar conversation, although it was a little more tense.

"So...Pepper-"

"Virginia." Pepper said, cutting her off.

"Excuse me?"

"My name is Virginia. Pepper is a nickname my family calls me."

"Oh. Okay, Virginia, how long have you known Y/n and Tony?"

"Oh about nine or so years. I was promoted to assistant when I saw how much of a mess Tony was." Pepper said casually.

Dick and Jason tensed, overhearing the tense conversation between the two mothers. But before Dick could interrupt Jason sat him back down.

"I wanna see what happens."

Christine continued, " And when did you become a..more permanent around the house?"

"When I saw that Y/n the one taking care of Tony." Pepper said in a serious tone, "She was the one making sure he didn't choke on his vomit and eating cereal as his flings walked out the room. Then he got kidnapped...and y/n was alone. So I made sure she’d never be alone again.”

Christine heart sank. She knew about the whole kidnapping thing. Why she didn't step in, she doesn't know. It's just another thing she regrets to this day.

Before Pepper could continue, she heard two sets of footsteps and voices

"All I'm saying is, if he looks at me funny, I'm fighting him and that's that."

"Yeah maybe not the best impression on..." Peter cuts off when they reach the living room. Eyes again on the two of you.

"Let's get this over with." You muttered, saying bye to Peter and making way over to the couch to sit next to Pepper.

"Y/n!" Christine says happily, " I'm glad you're here. We brought you something!"

She pulls out a box and she carefully hands it over to you.

You look at it suspiciously before getting a nudge from Pepper.

"Thank you." You grit out. Earning a glare from Damian and Cassandra.

You open the box to see...cupcakes.

"They're the peanut butter strawberry cupcakes you used to like. Remember? I used to bring them when I came to see you." Christine says, trying to bring up good memories.

You frown and close the box, " I'm allergic to strawberries."

Lie.

Pepper casts a glance towards you, "They look lovely, let me take them into the kitchen, I'll check on dinner."

And with that she takes the box and leaves into the kitchen. Leaving you and Tony alone.

"So...Stark" Damian started fixing his gaze on you.

"Yes, Wayne?" You said, matching his energy.

"What exactly is it you want from my mother?" He asks, earning a groan from his older brothers.

"Well, I'd appreciate it if she left me alone." You say with a straight face.

Christine frowns but before she says something Damian speaks up again.

"Tt, all this drama for the likes of you? It's honestly disappointing" He drawls, trying to get under your skin.

"Damian!" Christine scolded.

"Well, I apologize for not meeting your standards. I'd try harder if I cared what a toddler thought of me."

Jason let out a surprised chuckle while the rest of the family looked on in shock. Tony just rolled his eyes.

"I do not understand why Mother insists on rekindling her relationship with you. You obviously weren't worth the effort the first time around." He spits, causing the rest of the family to gasp.

You however, just laugh, " When you figure it out, let me know. It's probably the same reason she puts up with you."

Damian glares, about to start in again when Jason cuts him off " Shut up Demon. She got you man."

"Tt"

"I'm Jason, and anyone who can out that brat in check is good in my book." He says sending you a smirk.

You smile back, " I'm friends with Loki and Wade Wilson, I'm hardly affected by anything anymore." Your dad rolls his eyes again, he’s not exactly enthusiastic about your choice in friends.

You like this one. Probably the one you're gonna be able to stand in this family.

"Don't hog her Jason!" Dick shouts pushing him away before turning to smile at you, " Hi! I'm-"

"Dick Grayson. I know, you spilled your champagne on my dress a few years ago at a New Years gala." You say, still a little bitter about it.

"Oh. heh, right, sorry about that. Again." He says sheepishly.

You turn to Cassandra, " You're Cassandra. You and your friend cornered me in the bathroom."

Cassandra scowls and looks away.

Then you turned to Tim, " And you need to learn how to secure your fire walls better."

Tim looked at you confused, "Um excuse me?"

You smirked, " Just a suggestion. I assume you don't want people to know about your...bats in the attic?"

The whole family froze.

You knew? There was no way.

"Kid, are you hacking again?" Tony said exasperatedly, " You promised you'd stop after the last time."

"Hey it's not my fault Shuri didn't think about changing her password." You say defensively, “ and it’s not like you were complaining when you had me hack into SHEILDS databases”

“What was that!?” Pepper shouts from the kitchen.

“Heheh, nothing dear.” Tony shouts back then in a hushed voice scolds you, “ I gave you fifty bucks to keep that a secret.”

“I didn’t say what you had me retrieve.” You said smugly leaning back in your chair.

Bruce didn’t know how to feel.

On one hand, this teen that objectively hates his family, knows their biggest secret. She can singlehandedly destroy their family and expose them. And she has the means to.

But on the other, she’s a perfect fit for their family. She gets along with Jason, doesn’t let Damian get under her skin, and from the looks of it can definitely take care of herself. Only thing is, again, she hates his wife and by association, his family.

“I’m sorry, hacking? You know that’s illegal right?” Tim asks, still in shock that you got past his security systems.

You turn to him and in a bored tone replied , “Yeah? and?”

Tim stuttered for a bit before going quiet with a blush. It was adorable really.

You had to hold back a laugh, it was fun getting this stuffy family all riled up. Especially when you can see the disapproval in Christines face.

“Tony, you let our daughter participate in illegal activities??” Christine asks with a raised brow.

The table goes silent at the tone of her voice. Knowing that when she uses it someone is really in trouble.

But you roll your eyes because how are you supposed to know what that tone means?

“I let my daughter express herself in a ...healthy way. She knows her limits.” Tony replies cooly, taking a drink and looking back into the kitchen wondering where Pepper went.

”Obviously not. Tony she has no regard for the laws at all! You think i didn’t see the headlines last year?!”

Ah yes, last year you had a slight scandal where you may have punched a pap for trying to get a picture up your skirt but who wouldn’t?!

“ And you let her hang around criminals and terrorists?!”

You scoff, “ Oh please everyone in the Avengers was a criminal or terrorist at least once.”

“Not helping kid.” Tony says, “Christine, you and your family have no right to come into my home and judge my family. I’ve been civil. Hell maybe a little too much. Mainly because if I wasn’t, my wife—err Fiancée, would kill me.”

You snicker, earning a few glares.

“Look the point is, don’t tell me how to raise my daughter. Especially because I was doing it all alone.” Tony finishes with a sigh.

The table goes silent. You were getting tired of all the tense silences today.

“ Look.” You turn to Christine, “ I get that you probably feel guilty or something because you ditched me. And I appreciate that or whatever.”

You were not good at this.

“ But I don’t wanna live with you.”

Christine looks down sadly, “ Y/n I just...I just want to get to know you again. You’re my baby.”

Before you could answer you heard a crash come from the kitchen and smoke fill the rooms.

“ Pepper?!” You cough, “ Dad what’s happening?!”

“ I don’t know. Stay here” He says summoning his suit.

“FRIDAY?!” You shout, but not hearing the AI.

The Wayne’s all looked at each other in panic. They didn’t bring their suits, thinking it was just a dinner.

You turn to them and shout “ Come with me, and stay low!”

You start to lead them to the stair case, knowing that the rooms were relatively safe.

“Come on!” you yell when they don’t follow you.

Christine stands from her seat and makes to follow you before being stopped by Damian.

“Mother we cannot..”

“Damian, I’ve had about enough of you. Let’s go.” She says sternly and follows you. The rest of the family following behind as Bruce nudges Damian.

“ Come on son.”

“Father we don’t know where she’s leading us.” Damian says stubbornly.

“There’s nothing we can do right now.” he coughs.

The sounds of punching and the blasts come from the kitchen.

“Let’s go.”

They finally join the rest of the family. You have them crouched in the hallway.

“ This is James’ room. Dad had it modified just incase he was ever triggered into the Winter Solider again. No ones getting through this door when it’s locked.”

You usher them in.

“Come on Y/n” Christine says reaching a hand out to you.

You smirk, “ What? and miss all the action?”

You close the door and lock it before leaving. Laughing at their surprised faces.

The room is silent.

“ She’s awesome!” Jason says with a laugh.

[mylazyreactions]

Sole gets a cat! Companions react!

Sole gets a cat!

Cait: “Just don’t let the furry thing barf in my shoes.” Overall, she appreciates the cat's independence and the fact it normally leaves her alone. When no one's looking she does slip them a bit of fish. Can't ever say she didn’t give nothing. Gets a kick out of seeing it wig out on catnip.

Codsworth: Oh god help him all that cat hair. Well, he does sorta live for this so it can’t be too bad. “Never worry mum/sir, ill ensure your precious feline is groomed to the highest standard!” You know those people that make stuff out of pet fur? Yeah, he does that. Very nice though!

Curie: “Oh what a sweet thing! How unusual for it to be unradiated like this, I would very much like to examine them more closely!” It’s too late, that’s her cat now. No take-backs. Shes the first to offer to watch over it anytime Sole has to leave without her. It’s now her little assistant.

Danse: “I would advise you get them a collar of some sort before it wonders off.” He wouldn’t say he’s not a fan, but he just isn’t too interested at first. But after his reveal, sometimes when he’s sitting by himself, the cat wanders over and lays by him, keeping him company. He finds he enjoys their company much more.

Deacon: “Oh please tell me your gonna let me name them! Sir Pounce a lot Cat Meat!” We’ll I’ve heard worse names. He calls the feline his silent twin and brags about how he’s a much better dancer. “It’s ok, I heard cats don’t dance anyway.” Ok seriously, how does he know that movie?!

Dogmeat: New soft friend? Friend play? Yes please! It takes the two of them a bit to understand each other, but he’s SO excited to play! The cat knocks things off counters and he fetches them. It’s a win-win!

Hancock: “Well that’s one nice pu-” *SMACK* Yeah, he’s prone to such comments, but don’t let that deter you. Hes very fond of the thing and is the one responsible for giving it catnip. Since he has trouble regulating his temperature, whenever he’s sleeping over, he uses them as a sort of heater.

Maccready: “Aww aren’t they cute? You sure Dogmeat won’t eat them?” He’s honestly not sure what to make of them, but at least they make a good hunting partner and keep out rats. On cold nights he likes to leave a few cat treats in his room, hoping it’ll come in and keep his feet warm.

Nick: “Always good to have another furry friend around.” Since he doesn’t technically need to sleep, he’s usually up when the feline gets the zoomies at 2 AM. He gets a laser pointer and helps them settle down for the night. Calls them his ‘Little Partner.’

Piper: Is completely in love with it. Quite an animal charmer herself, she manages to get the cat to hold still long enough to take a picture of them wearing a hat. Eventually she decides to have a sort of side bar in her paper, taking pictures of the “Pets of the Commonwealth.” It’s quite a hit!

Preston: “Well they’re awfully cute general. I’ll make sure they stay safe.” Well here comes the newest mascot of the minutemen! Don’t be too surprised if he takes them out on patrol, wearing its own little minutemen hat! Definitely sneaks them cat treats when no ones looking.

Strong: At first he thinks sole is keeping it for rations, but even after getting disappointed, he promises not to eat the furry thing. But once, during a raider attack, the feline runs out and starts biting the bastards in the nose. “Furry thing good fighter. Charges like super mutant!” No higher compliment can be given.

X6: “If you intend to keep this thing, at least try to keep them clean.” Perhaps he’s just a bit jealous when being compared to them, but he really doesn’t care. But that’s only a cover! In the dead of night, if you look very carefully, and are fast enough, you may see X6 having conversations with the feline.

Ada: Ultimate cat toy collector, warm body, and excellent scratching post? Ada just became someones best friend! Just don’t expect her to chase them if they run off.

Longfellow: Cats and fishermen are a tale as old as time. He rows out with a line with the feline in tow, getting some warm company. The cat gets free fish and scritches. Perfect bliss.

[rubysunnday]

your song, prt 2 | c.b

Summary: As their wedding day approaches, Y/N’s parents continue to disappoint her. Colin reminds her that his own family is now hers.

Part 1 

Colin Bridgerton had a way with words.

Ever since the concert, he hadn’t stopped writing Y/N little notes, proclaiming his love to her and comparing her to a summer’s day. Y/N was almost certain that half the things he wrote down where stolen directly from Anthony’s copy of Shakespeare’s sonnets, but she wasn’t complaining.

In the dozens of letters he sent her from when he was on his travels abroad, he always managed to describe what he was seeing in a way that made Y/N feel like she was there. From his vivid descriptions of the Grecian beaches lined with houses of every colour to the snowy heights of Norway, Colin somehow always made her feel as if she was there.

Y/N treasured each and every letter he sent her, tying them all together with a beautiful ribbon that he'd sent all the way from Amsterdam. They sat on her shelf next to the dried flowers that had been a part the bouquet of flowers he'd given her for her birthday.

She had spent the day with the Bridgerton's since her own parents were too busy up in Scotland to come down to celebrate.

Her parents were constantly disappointing her. They had barely even acknowledged her since she’d announced her engagement and she was tired of being ignored. 

Y/N walked into the drawing room of Bridgerton House, a fake smile on her face. 

“Y/N!” Hyacinth squealed, running up to her future sister-in-law and hugging her.

“Hello, Hyacinth,” Y/N said, returning her hug.

"I thought your parents were coming," Anthony said, noticing Y/N's lack of escort. His brow furrowed in concern as he noticed Y/N’s forced smile.

"They are in Scotland," Y/N replied, sitting down on the sofa and sighing. "They are too busy with my sister's horse riding competition to bother coming down to celebrate."

Y/N was trying to hide her upset about being forgotten by her parents. It wasn't the first time it had happened and it probably wouldn't be the last. Y/N's sister was their dream child - the talented one who would probably be the diamond of whatever year she decided to make her debut in.

Y/N's own debut had been almost ruined by her parents. Her grandfather had died two days before she'd been due to be presented to the queen and her parents and vanished overnight to Cornwall, leaving Y/N behind with no one to present her or accompany her to the ball.

Which was when Colin had stepped in. They'd found each other out in Hyde Park where Y/N had gone to escape her house and by the time they'd walked back to Bridgerton House, Colin had decided that Y/N was worthy of so much more than what her parents were giving her.

"Anthony!" Colin yelled, as soon as he walked inside the front door of Bridgerton house. "Anthony!"

"Colin, be quiet, it is fine," Y/N said, hitting his arm not too gently.

"No, it is not fine," Colin replied, his usual cheeky grin absent. "This is one of the most important days in your life and they have just left you! Anthony!"

"Colin, will you stop yelling!" Y/N hissed, noticing the staff giving them both bizarre looks.

Colin didn't listen. "ANTH - oh, there you are."

Anthony Bridgerton all but ran down the stairs, panic on his face. "What, who is injured?"

"No one," Colin replied, frowning. "What made you think that?"

"You yelling, probably," Y/N muttered, yelping as Colin elbowed her.

Anthony sighed and closed his eyes in despair. "Colin,” Anthony said slowly, looking up “what do you want?"

Colin shoved Y/N forward, the woman almost falling into Anthony at the sudden shove. She shot Colin a glare but he ignored it, putting his hands on her shoulders and spinning her back to face Anthony.

"Y/N, here. Our wonderful, amazing Y/N, has been abandoned by her parents. They will not be able to present her to the queen in two day's time nor will they be able to escort her to the ball. Therefore, I was wondering if you and mother could do it."

Y/N looked up at Anthony. She'd known him since she was eight and the Viscount had become a parental figure in her life, replacing the lacklustre figure that was her actual father. But asking him and his mother to present her to the queen was a massive ask.

Anthony's eyes softened as he looked down at Y/N. He put a hand on her shoulder and nodded. "Of course we can. Come upstairs, Y/N, Eloise will be very annoyed if she finds out you stopped by and did not say hello. We can talk more then."

Y/N took Anthony's arm and let him walk her up the stairs. She glanced behind her and mouthed a thank you to Colin who sent her a smile and a thumbs up.

Anthony gestured to the sofa next to Eloise and Y/N blinked, suddenly remembering where she was. 

"So, your parents are continuing the standard they set when they did not turn up to your debut, then?" Eloise asked, moving up as Y/N sat down next to her. She offered the tin of sweets she was holding out to her.

"Please, do not remind me," Y/N muttered, taking a red sweet. "Thank you, again, for saving me," Y/N said, looking up at Anthony and Violet. "Truly."

"Do not worry about it, my dear," Violet replied, waving her off. "Will you be joining us for dinner tonight?"

"If you do not - Colin, what on earth?"

Y/N stared at Colin, who was struggling to hold a large bouquet of roses, hyacinths, elderflowers and daisies, with a perplexed look.

"Happy birthday!" He exclaimed, setting them on the table in front of her.

Y/N leant back to avoid being poked in the eye by a branch of elderflower. "I..."

Colin's face fell. "You hate them, I can tell. I was not sure how big was too big or how many flowers to include -"

"Colin, I love it," Y/N said, cutting him off. "I just was not... expecting anything."

Colin smiled down at her. "I could not remember which flower was your favourite out of them," he said, fiddling with a daisy, "but I remembered you liked how purple contrasts with blue and how yellow breaks the colours up like it does in a sunset. Specifically -"

"The Athens sunset of July 1814," Y/N said softly, remembering every single detail of that letter.

Colin's description of the sunset had stuck with her ever since. He'd described it in so much detail she'd felt as if she'd been sat next to him on the beach.

Her birthday flowers had only been the start. Colin seemed to remember every passage that had transported her, every sentence that had made her envy his freedom, every word Y/N had felt connected to and turned it into affection and gifts.

He made her feel wanted and loved when her own parents forgot about her or dismissed her. Whenever she cried he picked her up and read from his journals to distract her. Every single ball he would compare her dress to a sunset he'd seen and Y/N would just listen in awe as the words flowed like a song.

And then he had actually written her a song and had gotten it performed at the opera and Y/N had fallen head over heels in love with him. Colin had proposed to her that night and Y/N hadn’t hesitated before saying yes.

Colin had began leaving notes around her house, counting down to their wedding day. They’d come accompanied by flowers or little presents and even watercolours of her favourite places. Y/N kept them all in a box under her bed, hidden away from her parents who, if she was honest, didn’t really care about Y/N’s wedding or her successful match. 

Her parents lack of interest in her or her wedding hurt. Y/N was hoping that her match to Colin would have at least perked something inside them but all she’d received was stoney silence and her father telling her that they couldn’t make it. He didn’t say why they couldn’t make it, just that they couldn’t make it. 

“Hey, are you alright?” Colin asked quietly, nudging Y/N’s arm.

Y/N turned her head to look at Colin, realising that he’d evicted Eloise off the sofa and taken her place. Benedict and Anthony were both looking over at them with matching looks of concern but Y/N focused on Colin and nodded. “I am fine, Colin. I am simply thinking.”

“Well, we all know how dangerous that is for you, my love,” Colin replied teasingly, winking at her. His smile faded as he noticed her solemn expression. “Come on, tell me what is wrong.”

“My parents,” Y/N said quietly. “They... well, you know what they do to me. They have said that they are not coming to the wedding and have not even acknowledged me since we got engaged. They do not even acknowledge my birthday and I just -” Y/N cut herself off with a hefty sigh and dropped her head onto Colin’s shoulder. “I am so tired of them.”

Colin rested his head on top of Y/N’s and held her hand. “I know you are, darling. I am sorry they are not better parents. But,” he lifted his head up and gently tilted Y/N’s chin up, “you do not have to worry about them anymore. My family is your family, Y/N.”

Anthony, who had been listening to every word, spoke up. “Y/N, I will happily walk you down the aisle if you do not want your parents there.”

Y/N nodded and smiled, feeling tears burning her eyes. “Thank you, Anthony.”

Anthony could read her like a book and got up, pressing a kiss to her cheek. “I promise you, I will not let them ruin your day.”

Y/N nodded. “I know, Anthony, thank you.”

Colin nudged her. “See, I told you. Besides, I do not believe that Hyacinth will let you go anywhere without her. You are a Bridgerton now.”

Y/N smiled sadly and kissed him on the cheek. “I cannot wait to marry you, Colin Bridgerton.”

“I cannot wait to marry you either, Y/N Bridgerton,” Colin replied with a smile.

[yesimwriting]

Searing Starlight (chapter two)

A/n Chapter twooo!! I cannot believe the support I’ve been getting on here im so excited to share my six of crows/shadow and bone fics with y’all!

 Lmk if you’d like to be tagged when I update this story!! And just letting y’all know I take requests so if you have an idea you’d like to see me attempt feel free to comment it or send it in :)) 

--

At least Kaz’s claimed ‘wraith’ (which is such an odd thing to just have) is a girl, and a seemingly kind one at that. She was quick to find me, body pressed into wooden shelves and glass bottles, and subtly gesture for me to follow her. It had been difficult to keep track of her flighty form through the crowd, but I think there was a point in her strange raveling, to make sure no one was following me. 

She’s not particularly talkative, but she doesn’t seem bothered by me. She tossed me a random oversized shirt to pull over my dress when she saw how I kept adjusting the fabric and crossing my arms. That was kinder than she needed to be. I think I’ll like her. 

“So you’re a wraith,” I manage, breaking the nervous silence, “Like a full time, constantly on-call wraith.” 

The question seems to puzzle her, dark eyebrows drawing together. “Yes.” The corner of her mouth twitches up slightly, a smile. “A full time, constantly on-call wraith.” She hesitates, perfect stance adjusting. “What were you doing before?” 

Great. This question. “Nothing important.” It’s not a fair cop-out. Especially since she answered my question. “I um...I’m indentured to Rollan Kenya.” 

I watch her reaction to the name. Some know of him. Some revere him. Some loathe him and everything he’s associated with. “His religious interpretations are controversial.” 

“If you think what he says to the public is bad you should hear what he says in private.” I push myself further into the chair I’m in. 

Something strange flickers over her features. “I can imagine.” 

Shaking my head, I hope I’m ending this conversation. “What’s your name?” 

A hesitation. “Inej.” 

I nod once, “I’m y/n.” 

“Do you need water, y/n?” 

I scratch my still exposed knee. “That’d be nice. Thank you.” 

She’s quick to leave, feet making no noise. A minute later she returns with a cup. I have no reason to suspect her, but I still sniff the cup before taking a cautious sip. I wonder if Anya made it back home. I wonder if she’s worse off for it. 

Before I can fall into a pit of debating despair, the door to the room Inej took me to squeaks open. On instinct, I snap my gaze towards the door, tensing. The first person I notice is Kaz, entering the room with a determination too intense for this time of night. Jesper is quick to follow, and I drop my stare. I’ve never had to interact with anyone I’ve lied to after taking their money. 

“Are they gone?” Inej asks, clearly accustomed to such brooding tension. 

Kaz nods once, “It took too much convincing--the Inferni’s more than she’s letting on.” 

I’m literally in the room. “I’m not--we’ve spoken two words to each other, sorry my abilities didn’t come up.” 

He turns towards me with a deadly grace. My grip on the cup tightens. What the hell is wrong for me? How deeply instilled is that god complex Kenya wanted in me? It must be as part of me as my name if I felt comfortable enough to speak that way to Kaz Brekker. 

I keep my eyes on his cane, waiting for some kind of physical retaliation. “Maybe the grisha hunting you would appreciate your sense of humor more.” 

It’s a bluff. He needs me. He’s desperate for something that can mimic a Sun Summoner. Still though, I’m not in the mood to poke a bear with a stick. “Speaking from experience,” I clear my throat awkwardly, “They tend not to.”

“Then I suggest you begin explaining before I decide I’d rather take my chances and you lose your worth.” 

Maybe if I hadn’t spent the last eleven years of my life with Kenya, his words would haunt me. I keep my expression set, but the lanterns in the room flicker. “It’s not as impressive as they’re making it seem--Inferni can produce fire, regular, red, bright fire.” I pause, feeling energy in my palms. “I can do the same, but I can also,” I extend a flat palm, “Do this.” 

I focus my energy on restraint, forcing the fire on my skin to remain there, covering my palms in a cold, blue glow. “It’s still fire, just blue--and that matters to them because blue light is the only kind you can use in the Fold.” Do they know anything about the fold? “Kenya, the man I’m indentured to, believes that this ability makes me eligible for Sainthood. He specializes in collecting people he thinks are eligible for Sainthood.” The low flame coating my palm licks upwards as I remember what disappointing Kenya means. “And if you don’t meet his standards, he’ll find a way to make sure you do. That’s why the grisha want me. He made me more and they believe that if they give me to someone who can give me an amplifier I’ll be able to produce enough blue light to protect an entire fleet.” 

“What do you mean ‘he’ll find a way to make sure you do’?” Inej’s voice is cautious. An attempt to be respectful. 

I drop my palm, letting the fire disappear into nothingness. “I wasn’t born with the ability to control the blue light so well--It’s difficult enough to produce for longer than two seconds let alone keep it from burning everything in sight. By the time I ended up in Kenya’s control he had learned that certain stimulants. Some scientists are working on a more grisha-targeted kind, but Kenya has managed to work with the generic well enough.” Hands shaking, I wipe the condensation off the side of the cup and hold out my wrist. Using the condensation, I begin to wipe at my wrist and forearm, smearing my makeup and revealing the needle bruises. “The key is withdrawals.”

Thoughts of begging Kenya, crying and screaming for another fix as he promised to give me that as soon as I showed some control of my abilities, make the shaking in my hand worse. I clasp my hands together, squeezing them in hopes of hiding the signs of withdrawal. 

I stare at the ground, not wanting to take anyone’s reaction in. I handle pity as well as I handle kindness. 

“Do you think you could produce enough blue light for one ship?”

Looking up, I take in Kaz’s measured expression. I’m glad he’s sticking to business. I’d rather that than deal with unpacking all of that with a group of strangers that don’t care if I live or die. 

“I could try.” I’ve never tried to protect anything that large. “Even if I can, it doesn’t mean a voyage like that will be safe.” 

“There’s no real safety in the Fold,” he replies easily. Realistic expectations. That will make this easier. “No one finds out about her--especially not Pekka Rollins.” 

I pull my arm towards my body, glad for the opportunity to hide the bruises. Signs of my weakness. The worst part was always the way Kenya would speak to me after. Pathetic. Weak. Trapped within the restraints of my flesh. 

“Who’s Pekka Rollins?” 

Kaz briefly turns his head in my direction. “No one that will ever concern you.” He ignores my annoyed huff. “We’ll use the Inferni to get to Alina Starkov.” 

Alina. Alina Starkov. “What do you want with Alina?”

 At that, the room seems to drain. I feel weirder than when they were seeing my abilities. 

“You know her?” Jesper’s surprise reveals more than Kaz wants him to. I don’t miss the glare he receives.

I half-shrug. “We were in the same orphanage for awhile.”

“How did you get to Ketterdam?” I don’t trust Kaz’s urgency. 

“I don’t remember, I was a child and I--I hit my head that night I think. I just woke up and I was with Kenya.” 

“How well do you know Alina?” 

There was a point in time in which she was my best friend. We learned how to braid hair by practicing on each other, we would draw maps together, and I was the only one who knew about her crush on Mal. “Not that well.” 

He takes a step forward, eyes almost squinting. The touch of distrust is evident on his face. “If you’re lying I’ll find out.” 

I owe Alina at least this. “Well then it’s a good thing I’m not.” 

I’m not naive enough to believe that I’ve convinced him, but his intense gaze does not remain on me. I’m relieved when his attention is off of me, but he’s only moving on to start planning the riskiest thing I’ve ever done. 

-- 

Taglist: @ambrosia-v-black 

[theladyismyshepard]

37 kill for Daniela the red head, She kills one of the servents because of jealousy but the maiden is into it?? Maybe kinda nsfw

Sorry for the wait, my friend

I Always Feel Like Somebody’s Watching Me (NSFW)

TW: Violence

The sun was beating down on your back as you tended to the garden that you grew in the back courtyard. You had appealed to the Dimitrescus the benefits of planting your own vegetables and fruits and possibly the occasional pretty flower here or there. The Lady seemed uninterested in the thought altogether, making it clear that her mind was reserved for more stimulating subjects. Bela seemed halfhearted with her thoughtfulness, quickly zoning out. Cassandra had rolled her eyes and walked away after the word “garden”. Daniela was smiling though, her eyes glittery before she nodded along almost vehemently.

“I agree,” she said unabashed, ignoring her mother’s arched brow and Bela’s scoff. “Think of the ingredients we could grow ourselves instead of sending for delivery every other week.”

“Daniela, dear,” started Alcina, sighing almost exasperatedly, “Do you plan on going out and tending to this “garden”, hmm?”

You wanted to interject, it was the perfect moment to take responsibility for the care of the garden, and possibly even the grounds just to improve your worth around the castle. Yet, it required a lack in manners to interrupt a Lady when she’s speaking, and Alcina had a severe standard when it came to manners. And so you were forced to go with the smart move and bite your tongue as Daniela’s face dropped. That didn’t stop you from attempting to gain eye contact to give her a beseeching look.

“I’m sure we can find someone.” insisted Daniela, her eyes cutting to you before snapping back to her mother. “Someone very dependable,”

“I can do it,” you piped up, taking the opportunity, eyes dropping to the floor once Alcina’s gaze fell onto you.

“The question is will you,” drawled Alcina, eyes narrow as they looked you up and down. “As in, will I allow a human thing as yourself to control anything that is mine?”

You would have fell to your knees beneath the weight of the Lady’s attention had it not been for a certain redhead to stepped closer to you. You wanted to grab her hand, pull her close, wrap yourself around her for comfort, but you don’t. You never act on it, and she never dragged you to her bedroom cackling and giggling wildly as she did with other maids when she needed to get off. Though you were also the only one who didn’t emerge scarred and torn up.

“Of course, my Lady,” you conceded, bowing your head to show a sign of submission.

“Mother,” said Bela quietly, calmly interjecting, and waited until Alcina turned to address her. “I also think that a garden would be beneficial.”

Daniela had clapped happily when she realized her sister was aiding her in swaying their mother. Your eyes couldn’t settle between the three of the Dimitrescus. Alcina cocked her head to the side, adopting a fake look of thoughtfulness to cover how unimpressed she was.

“Oh, you do, darling?”

“Yes,” pressed Bela before her mother could continue on. “Imagine the access to ingredients for remedies to give the livestock. We could even grow foreign plants required for different potions!”

Fuck the fruits and vegetables, I guess.

And that was how the Lady was worn down and forced to give into her daughters desires. The garden didn’t necessarily consist of the produces that you originally planned for, but it got you out of the castle for extended points of time, and you weren’t complaining one bit. Castle Dimitrescu was a rather large estate, so there was plenty of room for the several varieties of roots, plants, and flowers that the Dimitrescus requested you take care of.

The heat of the sun had you pulling at the hem of your shirt to bring it up and wipe the sweat from your brow. The warm breeze hit you squarely on your exposed midsection, and you felt the dripping sweat drying grossly against your flesh. It felt as though eyes were upon you and when you let go of your shirt, ready to turn to check the windows of the castle, a person standing next to you nearly had you jumping out of your skin.

“Oh!” gasped the woman — a maid, “I’m sorry for scaring you.”

“It’s alright,” you assured, breathless and attempting to return your heart rate back to normal. “What’re you doing out here?”

Being outside was a luxury that none of the other maids could afford, so you were confused as to how this maid, Elle, had managed to avoid the lingering eyes that were everywhere. Her eyes averted as a slight blush came to her cheeks, and that’s when you saw the glass of water in her hand and your brain put two and two together. Oh.

“It’s hot today,” said Elle nonchalantly, even shrugging. “I figured you might need this.”

“Thank you,” you replied earnestly, grabbing the glass and taking greedy sips before you handed it back. “I appreciate it.”

“Well, I can’t have you fainting and bringing attention to yourself, now can I?” joked Elle, smiling bashfully.

You could’ve sworn that eyes were upon you, and you even went as far as to turn and check the windows, and while you thought you saw one of the curtains shifting, it also could’ve been a trick on your eyes. You furrowed your brow but turned back to Elle, who was looking at you expectantly, and for what, you weren’t sure. You smiled warmly.

“Thank you again, Elle, but I don’t want to hold you up any longer than I have.” You warned, making a face to emphasize, and she nodded in disappointment but reached forward to squeeze your hand.

“Stay safe,” she said, the maids’ usual words of departure.

“Stay safe,”

Eyes were watching you, but you couldn’t see from where, and that was the most dangerous predator: the one who hides before striking, and there was one predator who always had her watchful eye on you. Daniela. You gulped at the thought of Daniela catching another maid outside just to talk to you... no one, not even you were allowed to bend any of the rules, not even once... not when you were so easily replaced. Hopefully if you just went back to attending to the garden (rather stiffly), you could pretend that nothing would be amiss when you went back inside.

***

There was tension hanging in the air, thick enough to choke, and it had your spine as straight as a rod as you trudged through the pristine castle with your overall dirtiness, your shoes abandoned at the door. It was oddly quiet, and when the maids spotted you, they turned away quick, eyes wide with fright. Every step you took towards any of them, the maids took about six or seven steps away from you. Castle Dimitrescu might’ve been weird, but that was a new one...

You gave up on making conversation and instead wandered off to find a clean uniform to change out of the more comfortable wear you wore to tend to the ingredients. There was the nagging feeling that something was off in the air... Where were the Lady’s daughters? Their signature cackles failed to echo off the walls, and it left an uneasy silence in its wake. Now that you thought about it, you weren’t running into Elle either as you wandered deeper into the castle and found the maids’ quarters.

You quickly changed and made yourself presentable for your next task, and then you were again walking through the silent halls as you made your way to the kitchen. There was no real warmth to the kitchen, not when the stove had gone untouched for as long as you had been there. It wasn’t your place to question things around there, but you couldn’t help but to ask questions when you stepped inside and there was a silver platter with the cover still hiding what was underneath. What had you puzzled was the note that simply read your name propped right up against the cover.

You craned your neck when you felt eyes upon you yet again, but nobody was there... you knew better though and that’s what had needles prickling your skin and a cold sweat to break out. All that was missing was the giggling, but this really seemed like one of Daniela’s games she enjoyed playing. You turned back to the platter, and reached for the handle of the lid. After a shaky moment of building yourself up, you ripped the cover off like a bandaid, and froze, arm still raised.

Placed neatly upon the silver platter was Elle’s severed head. Her eyes were closed, and for that, you were grateful... you were too ashamed to look her in the eye seeing as this was all your fault. As your breathing hollowed out, that was when you finally heard a deep chuckle, one that had you going rigid... this wasn’t the Daniela that you had gotten used to, but it was one you were aware she could possess. Was she directing it towards you? You dropped the lid with a clatter.

“I didn’t like her very much.” said Daniela simply, and you gulped. “She liked you too much.”

You couldn’t miss the edge in her voice on the word. You finally blinked (your eyes suddenly burned) and looked away from the platter to connect eyes with the redhead. She wasn’t smiling and that was never a good sign. You forced a smile, one that you were scared was too obviously false.

“I didn’t like her either.” You choked out, fully turning your body away.

“You didn’t?” asked Daniela, her voice suddenly small and seeking reassurance, and you were struggling to keep up with her complete 180.

“Daniela...” You couldn’t say what you really wanted to... She was just bringing me water! “Why does it really matter to you so much?”

“Because you are mine!” She snapped, and you frowned.

“Doesn’t every maid here belong to you?” You countered, though you had to admit, you have more leeway than others did.

“They belong to the family, but you, you are mine, darling.” purred Daniela, stalking forward very slowly until she was before you. “No one else can even look at you the way I do.”

“But the other maids that you’ve...” You cringed, unwilling to finish, but Daniela picked up on what you were trying to say.

“I feed from them and that is all... Getting them a little scared makes the blood just a bit sweeter.” chuckled Daniela, and you frowned yet again.

“I thought you-”

“Slept with them?” Daniela drawled, now it was her turn to frown at you. “As tempting as it was, I think there’s one delicacy that I’m saving my pallet for.”

Her eyes roamed over your body with no holds barred, and you weren’t sure how you felt about the shiver that tingled down your spine. The fact that there was a severed head behind you was kinda throwing you for a loop. Daniela had her index finger and her middle finger tiptoeing up your arm until she was gingerly holding the side of your neck with obvious care. You gazed into her eyes and you were thoroughly entranced by the red headed beauty that would kill for you.

“Do you love me?” You whispered, almost afraid that what you were asking was a stupid question. Daniela’s face softened.

“I absolutely adore you, my love,” cooed Daniela, pulling you into a searing kiss that had your heart stuttering in your chest, and when the need for air had you pulling back, she already had her eyes open and watching you. “No one can take you away from me.”

Any sane person would hear the threat for what it really was, but there was nothing sane about the feelings she evoked from you just by being near you, even with Elle’s head served up right beside you. There was something about her possessiveness that could make you either feel very secured, or somewhat aroused, and you could hardly think of anything else but the fingers scratching at the hair at the base of your neck.

“I doubt anyone would be capable of taking me away from you.” You mused, and it was true. Bless the soul who tried to free you from the clutches of Daniela.

“Hm,” she hummed, her eyes narrowing thoughtfully as her eyes cut over every inch of your face. “Perhaps I should leave my mark for all to see?”

What surprised you the most was it seemed as though she was genuinely asking you. Her hand was still scratching the back of your neck, and her free hand reached up to rub soothing circles along your jugular with the pad of her thumb. Daniela’s compulsive attitude can lead her to doing whatever the hell she wanted without fear, but here she was, asking for your permission to drink from you. This redhead never failed to be full of surprises, and you found that you kinda liked that Daniela was so crazy for you.

“I belong to you,” You said quietly, unwilling to break the atmosphere that was enveloping the two of you, and you knew you said the right thing when her eyes shone with nothing but adoration and if you looked closer, love.

Daniela continued to cup the back of your neck with one hand, and used the other to hold you carefully by your shoulder, and she gently guided you to expose your throat just a bit more before she slowly bit into your throat. You gasped at the initial sting of your flesh giving way beneath the power of her teeth, but you allowed her to continue what she needed to do and permitted the subtle pull at your bloodstream. You felt the vibration of her own moan against your skin and it had you lightheaded.

“Daniela,” you groaned, feeling her teeth still inside of your skin with every syllable, and it also felt good when the hand on your shoulder rubbed down your arm and up your back.

“Does that feel good, darling?” pressed Daniela, unlatching just long enough to pull back and bat her eyelashes at you. “Do you love this as much as I do?”

Her tongue flattened against your bite mark, cleaning you of any trickling blood before she moved to the opposite side. She placed an open mouthed kiss there before she latched on once more, prompting your whole body to flinch within her grasp, but trust Daniela to hold on tight. It felt as though there would be a couple bruises by the time the next morning rolled around, but something told you that was a good thing to have within Castle Dimitrescu. It was like your own charm to ward off the evil that could lurk around the many hidden corridors.

You felt her pushing you back up against the table, and your foot brushed against the lid, causing it to scratch against the floor with an unflattering sound. The small of your back connected with the table, leaving you no more room to go backwards. Your hands flew to the edge as you used the table as support as Daniela basically leaned her full weight into you as she fed and marked you.

Your eyes flew open when she abruptly pulled away, her chin smeared with your blood and her eyes crazed with desire, but also soft with emotion and it was directed right at you. She never broke eye contact as she slowly dropped to her knees before you, and your breathing became irregular as she reached forward to push the end of your uniform up higher and higher until you had to shiver at how exposed you felt.

“Do you love me?” asked Daniela suddenly, bringing your wandering mind to a complete halt, and you looked down into her wide, almost innocent eyes as she stared earnestly up at you. “I never heard you say it to me.”

“I love you more than life itself,” You responded and you were surprised at just how honest it felt... You could die tomorrow and you’d have felt content enough to just allow it.

Daniela’s megawatt grin was so wide that you knew there was no way of it coming off anytime soon, not with the pure happiness radiating from it, and certainly not with the way it reached itself to her eyes. She giggled madly and soon it was the only indication of her because she disappeared beneath the skirt of your uniform and you jumped at the warm tongue that was persistent in searching your body. Your knuckles turned white as your grip on the table tightened and you lost yourself to the wetness of Daniela’s tongue on you, and you found that it was true...

No one could ever steal you away from the perfection that was Daniela. Not when she was the only one that could turn you on with a familiar severed head just inches away..

[hello-everyfandom]

"For a moment, listen silently, what does your heart say?”

Warnings: N/A

Pairing: Sirius Black x Reader

Words: 4k

Summary: Suffering lovers and hearts to be mended and stitched back together

Part One “I love you more than the sky and the ground but I can’t do this anymore.”

Part Two “No, it’s over. She ended it.”

(This one is quite long! How hopes and dreams turn into the most painful writing one could ever print. Please, I wish for my own heart to mend as Sirius’ will.)

The next few weeks were nothing but tragic. Lily could barely get you out of your bed nevertheless to class. It seemed that the fight, the breakup, the hurting wore down your stamina until you were not able to stand. It was worse after the party. Before, you could numb the pain of losing Sirius by distracting yourself with rewriting notes and organizing your room. But after the party, after seeing the love of your life lip-locked with another girl, kissing her the way he should kiss you, something in you broke.

Lily sat gently on your bed, placing the cup of warm tea on your table. She whispered kindly, “We have class in an hour, you missed breakfast but I brought you a cuppa.” She moved the duvet that covered your face to see your innocent watering eyes looking up at her. She sighed and smoothed out your hair, feeling the shutters of cries leave your lips. “You need to go to class, Y/N. I can’t keep telling McGonagall you’re sick without her sending you to St. Mungos.” 

“I don’t want to go.”

“Think about it this way,” Lily continued to run her fingers through your hair. She was thankful she had been able to get you to take a warm shower yesterday and change your pajamas, “If you go, you get it done and over with. Then you can come back and we can lay in your bed all afternoon.”

“I’m tired.”

“That’s why I brought you tea. Come on, love, it’s really time to get up.” Lily said gently, pushing the duvet so it was only covering your torso. Instead of sitting up, you blinked back tears before sputtering out.

“I made a mistake, didn’t I?” you covered your mouth, clutching your eyes shut to let out a cry. “I made a mistake breaking up with him. I’m an idiot. I’m a fool.”

“No, no,” Lily cooed, moving your hand from your mouth and petting your cheek, “No, you didn’t. You did what you thought was right at the time.”

“Then why does it hurt so bad?”

Lily didn’t have the answer, she could only reply with the utmost sympathy, “because you still love him.”

“Get up, you sad sack of shit. We’ve got charms in twenty minutes.” James flung the covers off of Sirius. His nose wrinkled at the sight of crumpled tissues that littered his bed. “That’s disgusting. Those tissues better not be from what I think it’s from.”

“You’re a right prick,” Sirius tried to smile, his lips cracked and chapped. 

“You’re not staying in bed anymore, and frankly you smell like shit.”

“It’s true,” Remus chimed in, straightening his tie and his hair. 

“So what? Leave me here. I don’t want to go anyways.”

“Right. Listen, Pads, we’ve been kind to you for a while now, but now, and I say this as sweetly and as loving as I can, we’re getting quite sick of your sulking.” James rolled his eyes.

“Oh wow, thanks,” Sirius said sarcastically, buttoning his shirt up. “You really know how to rip the plaster off, yeah?”

“Maybe if we obliviate you, you’ll become yourself once more,” Remus said wittily.

“I’ll permit it if it allows my memory to forget kissing that girl at the party.” Sirius nearly threw up at the memory of that girl’s lips on his.

James shrugged, throwing a tie at Sirius, “Well, we mean it with love and we know the break up has been hard but-”

“But?”

“But we miss our friend.” Peter finished. Remus nodded in agreement.

“It’s not easy, is all,” Sirius mumbled after brushing his teeth. 

James slapped his hand on his shoulder and said confidently, “No, it’s not. But that’s why we’ll all go through it together, as brothers.” and swiftly lead him out of the dorm room.

As Lily locked her arms in yours and the two of you walked from the Great Hall to class, you were distracted by the open windows of the corridors. The courtyard, which had just been littered with brown, orange, and red leaves, set a moment of comfort in your bones. You always enjoyed autumn, mostly because it was in fall when Sirius had first told you he loved you. You shook that memory out of your mind and looked at the hallway instead. Coincidentally, much to both Sirius and your demise, the marauders and Lily had accidentally crossed paths with each other on the way to class. Eyes like magnets were drawn close together as Sirius looked at you with storming emotions. He looked as if he hadn’t slept, and if he did manage to close his eyes, nightmares in the forms of memories followed him. To be fair, you didn’t look all that right either. Though you didn’t have as prominent bags under your eyes, underneath your loose clothing was skin and bone. Your appetite had lost you and eating became difficult as most of the time you felt sick to even think about food. Sirius looked at you, lost and longing, and you stared with the same intensity, wishing to be in his arms, to sleep for years and kiss until the sun explodes.

“Ms. Y/L/N, will you please stay after class?” McGonagall’s voice rang out in her sharp tone. You froze and looked at Lily worriedly who shrugged.

“You’ll be fine, don’t worry. Meet me in the common room after,” Lily whispered, squeezing your arm before leaving the classroom. It was loud and full of chatter from the students who excitedly were headed to dinner. You waited, pushing hair behind your ears nervously as the students collected their things and filed out of the room. Then, it was silent. You approached McGonagall’s office in the back of her classroom slowly, dreading whatever scolding she would give you. As you pushed open the door, you thought in your head quickly, you had handed in the homework, taken notes in class, raised your hand when asked a question, you couldn’t place anything you did particularly wrong and yet your palms began to sweat.

“Yes, Professor?” you asked with a small voice. McGonagall looked up from her desk and peered at you from her glasses. “Have I done something wrong?”

“Do you think you have done something wrong?”  

“I don’t reckon so, but I’m open to hearing any criticism if need be.” you focused on keeping your voice steady.

“Although, I’m sure you know the answer already, do you know what my particular job is here at Hogwarts?”

You bit your lip, “You’re a professor, perhaps one of the best ones here, of my favorites as well.”

“While I enjoy your compliment,” McGonagall sighed, “I am also the head of the Gryffindor house.”

“Yes, of course.” you nodded.

“And, with such a job comes the responsibility of looking after my students as if they were my own.”

“I’m not sure I understand, Professor.” 

“Sit, please, Ms. Y/L/N.” McGonagall motioned to the seat in front of her desk, a nice plush armchair with maroon velvet. “Despite the belief of my students, I do care, and I notice especially when a particular student seems out of place.” 

You sat on the edge of the seat and played with the threads of your sweater. “If it is my work that is not up to standard, I am sure I can revise or revisit whatever it is that has gotten low marks.”

“Your school work is hardly of the matter here,” Professor looked at the small girl in front of her. Once fiery and loud turned into a pebble on the floor. She admired and quite enjoyed having you as a student and took great pride in knowing you wore the Gryffindor sigil on your robes. But, like your friends, she had noticed an extreme change in demeanor in the past few weeks. “Are you doing alright, Y/N?” she asked kindly.

You looked up in surprise, “Yes, Professor. Though I will say, I will be disappointed if any of my homework or essays have been less than acceptable. I seem to be going through a little bit of a rough patch, I suppose.”

“I noticed,” you froze as McGonagall spoke, “Does this have anything to do with Mr. Black?”

“I-” you couldn’t think of an excuse. McGonagall put her hand up to stop your from speaking,

“Please, I may be older and I may be a teacher, but the students here seem to forget the Professors hear everything.”

You began to beg, “Professor, please, I promise whatever had happened will not affect my school nor my studies-”

She cut you off, “Have a biscuit, Y/L/N.” she motioned to the biscuit tin in front of her desk. When you showed signs of being wary, she opened the top of the tin and pushed it closer to you. Your hands shook as you took one and began to nibble on the edges.

“I do not speak of this, and I trust whatever I tell you and whatever you tell me stays in this office,” she started, you nodded furiously and she continued, “when I was younger, much much younger, perhaps about your age, I too fell in love.”

Your mouth fell agape.

“Dougal McGregor. I met him after my years at Hogwarts before I began my position at the ministry. It was, as most would say, a teenage love affair. We were much like you and Mr. Black. We argued senselessly, but we nevertheless loved each other. When he proposed, I was delighted. I accepted immediately.” your eyebrows rose to ask questions, however, McGonagall merely pushed the biscuit tin towards you again. You complied and took another.

“However, at the time, marriage between a muggle and a witch was proven more difficult than current times. Spouses of magical descent were forbidden to tell anyone of their skills in the wizarding world, and it. Well. The idea of living in a world without magic was unbearable. I had to make a decision.”

“What happened then, Professor?”

“I thought rejecting his proposal would be right for both of us, Dougal and I. I thought it was unfair to be kept in a magic-less marriage whilst Dougal would, in turn, be lied to every day. I made a decision and as a result,” her voice became low, almost sensitive, “I broke his heart and mine as well.”

“Oh Professor, I’m so sorry.”

“While it is in the past, I do think about him often. But, I suppose the feelings you are currently experiencing are what I felt when I left for the last time to London.”

“I see. Forgive me, Professor, why are you telling me this?” 

“Because I want you to know the consequences of decision making. The difference between truly thinking with your head and with your heart.” 

“Did you regret leaving?”

McGonagall pursed her lips in thought, the wrinkles shown prominently near her eyes, “Yes and no. I am overjoyed and proud to stand as the witch I am today. Becoming a professor and working with students, no matter how particularly unenjoyable some are, is a passion. However, it would be ignorant to say I did not frequently think about if I had stayed and married Dougal.”

“What happened to him?”

“I received a letter numerous months later, my mother had told me, Dougal married and was expecting his firstborn.”

“Oh,” you whispered.

“I find it humorous to sit here,” McGonagall gave you a wrinkled small smile.

“How so, Professor?”

“Because when I was heartbroken, the first person I told was my own teacher, you may know him now as Headmaster Dumbledore.”

“Really?” you asked in surprise.

“Yes, we sat here at my desk whilst I told him of my heartache. And now, I sit here, with my own favorite student, discussing hers.”

“I’m not sure if I would call it heartache, Professor,” 

“Then what would you call it?”

In class, Professor McGonagall was strict, sharp spoken. Instead, in her small office, she wore a sympathetic smile and her gaze was warm. You felt as though life and its troubles would cease their crimes against your broken heart the second you stepped in the room. But, still, you looked at her with lost sights, emotions swarming in pupils.

“I don’t think there is a word to describe it. All I know is I ache tremendously and nothing seems to fix this pit in my stomach. I. What do I do?” you begged for an answer.

“I’m afraid I cannot answer that. What I can say is, you’ve been thinking your entire life at Hogwarts with your head. You are a bright witch with a wonderful future ahead of her. You are hardworking and studious, and kind. But, you only seem to listen to your head for answers, you look for the logical position for your chess pieces. Stop your thinking. For a moment, listen silently, what does your heart say?”

Professor McGonagall looked at the time before sighing to herself, “I do suppose I’ve kept you too long, I trust you can find your way back to the common room?”

You nodded and stood, brushing off your skirt. “Of course. Thank you Professor for the biscuits. If it means anything, I’m sure Dougal loved you very much.”

“Y/L/N,” Professor called before you left, “You are welcome any time here, I was not lying when I said you were one of my favorite students.” 

You smiled back, “And I wasn’t lying when I said you were one of my favorite Professors.”

As you walked back to the Gryffindor common room, Professor McGonagall’s story repeated in your head, pounding against your brain and begging to be analyzed. If you thought carefully, letting go of Sirius was equivalent to McGonagall’s separation with Dougal. If you chose your studies and your career, Would you miss out on a life with your soulmate? There was no doubt in your mind that your heart belonged to a certain long-haired beloved. As the Fat Lady looked at you with great pity, you entered the common room, peaking around for Lily. The fire seemed to be the only source of warmth as it lit up the room, leaving shadows cast along the walls. You figured Lily must still be at dinner considering the common room was empty. You rubbed your tired eyes and sat on an armchair facing the fireplace. 

Sirius had decided wallowing was doing nothing but driving him across the wall. He threw a shirt over his shoulders and bounced down the stairs to meet the boys at dinner when he saw you. He could spot you from miles away even if he were blind to the bone. He recognized the old sweater you wore, one that had previously been owned by him. You loved the sweater despite threads coming loose and the smell of Sirius’ cologne fading away. He saw your hands curled up in fists, something you did when you were quite emotional or tired and the low messy bun you had pulled your hair into.

“I thought you were at dinner, Lils,” you spoke quietly, making him freeze. It had been so long, so many minutes and hours since he’d last heard your voice. “If you are here to drag me to the Great Hall, I have to decline as I’m morbidly exhausted from that emotional conversation with McGonagall.” 

Sirius attempted to find his voice, begging his vocal cords to say anything to you but all he could do was stand there, dumbfounded and aching to hear your voice once more. 

“Lily?” you expected to see your red-headed friend but instead made eye contact with him. “Oh.”

“Just Sirius,” he said awkwardly. You stood so you could face him, holding your hands in front of you.

You swallowed harshly and wished you had at least looked somewhat more manageable. “Sirius.”

“Y/N.” he answered. It was hushed, noiseless, painful. “Say something,” he begged.

“What do you want me to say, Siri?” he flinched when you used his nickname. You hadn’t even meant to use it, it just slipped off your tongue before you could realize it.

“Just. Say anything, yell at me, anything. Be angry at me!”

“Why would I be angry?” You weren’t angry. You were hurt.

“For...”

“For what?” you creased your eyebrows. 

“For kissing that girl at the party.”

You pursed your lips and Sirius only held sadness in his eyes. “Sirius...”

“I kissed another girl that wasn’t you, and it is absolutely tearing me apart. I want you to be angry with me.”

“I can’t.”

“Be mad! Yell at me!”

“Sirius,” you stopped him, putting a gentle, small hand on his arm, “We broke up.”

Sirius threw his arms in the air and ran a finger through his hair frustratedly, “that doesn’t make it okay.”

“Doesn’t it? We broke up,”

“No! It doesn’t because I told you, I promised you, I swore I would never kiss another person. I promised I was yours and yours only. And I am. I mean... I was.”

“Sirius, please,” you choked, “It’s hard enough to be around each other already.”

“Don’t you miss me? Miss us?” Sirius had to stop himself from gathering you in his arms and rubbing the small of your back. Biting your lip and eyes beginning to water, you said as quietly as you could,

“Of course I do. I miss you more and more every day. And yes, it... it hurt to see you with that Ravenclaw girl, but it doesn’t matter. We aren’t dating anymore.”

“I don’t know. I think.” He laughed humourlessly, as if the air escaping his lungs were nearly painful to feel, “I think I would’ve gone mental if I had seen you kissing someone.”

“I...” you stopped and sighed. You sat down on the couch, moving slightly to the left. Sirius looked cautiously before sitting next to you, facing you as you looked towards the fire. 

“We can still talk, can’t we? We used to talk all night until Moony would shush us like an old librarian.”

“I don’t know, Sirius. It’s hard. Isn’t it? It’s hard.”

“I know. But, I miss talking. Won’t you just tell me how you’re doing?”

You debated on lying, telling him you were fantastic, but something in you begged you to tell the truth even if it felt like magma on your tongue. “I’m not doing well.”

“Are you stressed about school? I’ve told you many times, you’re the smartest witch in our year, I doubt you have anything to worry about.”

“That’s not it.” you bit your lip, turning from the fire to look at those eyes you so deeply longed for.

“Then what?”

“It’s difficult.”

“Try me.”

“It’s difficult... with us, or without us, I should say.”

Sirius slightly flinched hearing those words and swallowed harshly, “I get the feeling.”

“How have you been?” you asked curiously, studying the way his eyebrows creased and his fingers threading through his hair.

“Same as you, I suppose.”

“Really?”

“Prongs and the boys, they’ve been on my back lately. Say I’ve been moping too much, I’m a downer it seems.”

You giggled under your breath and wrapped your arms around yourself, “Lily says the same. Though, I guess she’s just worried.”

“Worried?”

“I haven’t been sleeping as well, I’m sure you’ve noticed the bags under my eyes,”

“No,” Sirius said truthfully, “I think you still look as beautiful as ever.”

Your lungs stopped breathing, every airway and vein in your body closed as you began to shut down. You stood abruptly and began racing towards the dorm staircase.

“Stop!” Sirius shouted making you freeze, your hand still on the banister. “Stay. Talk to me.”

You wiped angry tears from your face that you didn’t even notice dripped down your cheeks, “And say what? It. it’s torturous, it’s beyond excruciating to be around you.” You thought about your chat with McGonagall, begging your heart to speak, scream anything to make to stop your head from making decisions.

Sirius’ lips frowned, hurt at your tone and your words. “Baby...”

“No! I. It’s too difficult.”

“Why?”

“Because when I look at you, when I see you, when I feel you around me, everything tells me I’ve made a mistake. Is that what you wanted to hear? I made a mistake. I fucked up. I fucked up because I was terrified of us. I was scared of driving you away, scared of you deciding you didn’t love me anymore. And I can’t. I can’t do it! I can’t. I made a mistake.” you spat out breathlessly. Sirius watched in horror as you began to hyperventilate and dove to put his arms around you. He had seen your panic attacks and held you through every one, but this time it felt different. Your breathing began to rapidly increase as you couldn’t hold back broken sobs. 

“Breathe, breathe, love. It’s okay. It’s all okay.” he held your face in his hands, cupping your cheeks like he used to. Your eyes searched his desperately for any buoy that could save you from the drowning you felt. As he blinked, you found your life vest, holding on for dear life as you breathed fresh air into scattered lungs.

“Breathe, okay? ‘M right here, not going anywhere.” he whispered low, kissing your forehead and wiping your tears.

“I’m sorry.” you sobbed, “I made a mistake. I love you. I do. I’m so sorry. What have I done? I love you. I love you more than anything, and I’ve ruined it all.” you threw yourself at him, arms gripping tightly as he caught you. Sirius’ arms snaked around yours, pulling you back to life, back to the earth. He was yours. He knew it. He’s never been anyone elses and he never plans to. How stupid he had been to let you go, to kiss another girl, to pretend he was okay when he was truly devastated. 

“We’re okay, yeah? Take care of each other, now, yeah?” Sirius rocked you slowly, feeling your cries die down in the comfort of his arms. 

“I’m so sorry.”

“Me too, darling.” Sirius guided you slowly to the couch, setting you comfortably on the cushions, “sit for a while,”

You nodded loosely as you leaned on his chest, hiccuping with cries. “I thought I was doing the right thing, leaving you. Had I known how wrong it was, I would’ve thrown myself off the Astronomy tower before ever breaking up with you.” 

“Don’t say that,” Sirius hushed, “I know, you thought it was the right thing. You were trying to protect yourself and me.”

“I’m a fool. A stupid, foolish girl.” you muttered, still catching your breath.

“Don’t say that either. I made mistakes too, perhaps one I’ll regret for the rest of my life.”

“Oh, Sirius.” you began to cry again, “I don’t care if you kissed another girl. I don’t. I just care that I’m the girl you want next to your side.”

He turned your limp body so he could cup your cheeks again, rubbing with the pads of his thumbs. “You will always be the girl. Always. Nothing will change that.”

“Sirius,” you whispered, looking at his lips.

“Yes, love?”

“Kiss me.”

That was all Sirius needed to hear. For days, weeks, endless hours, the two of you, broken hearted souls walked the earth wondering when the pain would end. Sirius tried drinking, you tried swallowing textbooks whole. Nothing seemed to work. Nothing seemed to mend the hurt you felt panging your insides, sending waves of heat down your spines. Nothing could distract you from the absolute shattering sadness that your bodies felt. Two broken hearted souls. Two souls joining for a kiss. A kiss that would last centuries as Sirius vowed to marry you the minute your lips connected. Togetherness, the touch of a soulmate. He moved his lips against yours slowly, tasting, memorizing and wishing this moment would never end. Salty tears and content smiles, at last, the two broken souls found what truly mended, what stitched your hearts back together. Each other. Forever in eternity, never drifting apart for long as fate, the universe and every good hearted soul brought you two together. 

[phantomtrader19]

Phantom of the opera 1st & 3rd preview review

PART 1

Auction - I was absolutely overjoyed to see the chandelier onstage!! I personally loved the new set, it was sad to see the angel had gone but I’m so glad they put the homage to Maria bjornson in the centre where the angel was as seen below (it’s modelled after Maria I overheard)

The cloth covered piece behind the chandelier is a broken middle section of the inner proscenium that when the overture starts re-assembles and rises into place absolutely stunning addition!!

some words were changed

“Lot 666, a chandelier until recently believed to be destroyed... *normal lyrics* “Our workshops have restored it and fitted it with wiring for the new electric light so that we may get a hint of how magnificent it will look when re-assembled” so like the restaged tour lyrics.

Standard auction really not much change but haunting as always!

Overture - perhaps a new sound system? But the overture was absolutely thunderous and I was LIVING for it, lighting design is new and a lot more flashes of light which upped the dramatic feel to it! The chandelier was new and I thought it looked absolutely wonderful it certainly didn’t disappoint it’s a lot bigger than the original which was a cool change. The curtains rose like before and the inner section of the proscenium was sort of like a centre piece and as the overture gets to the middle part where the music sort of slows then dramatically picks back up again (I hope I’ve explained that okay 😂) the dust covers on everything are very swiftly removed and it looks beautiful. The audience went crazy for the overture and it was just amazing to witness!

Hannibal - Saori’s cadenza was so fierce and you could tell she was having a blast up there! Again she got an applause as she came out on stage. The ensemble was fabulous as expected costumes again all the same but fresher as they were all brand new or from the uk tour 2020. Christine doesn’t come out with the ballet girls she joins just before they all do that lovely en pointe section which Lucy does as she is a trained dancer as well! A couple ballet girls now wear their wigs in curlers and tied up in ribbons to give that extra feel of a dress rehearsal which I’m still to figure out if I liked. Yukina Hasebe one of the ballerinas wears a black wig in a plaited ponytail with a black fringe which was interesting but they all wear their regular degas wigs the rest of the show. Everything else remained relatively the same.

Think of me (Carlotta) nothing different I don’t think, Saori sounds brilliant she’s so sassy I love her! Her tantrum is brilliant as she’s so tiny and all this anger bursts out of her it’s really funny!

Lily was also absolutely divine in this part aswell gorgeous voice and good comedic timing.

Greg Castiglioni has a nice voice but not too convinced on his portrayal as piangi not my fave but not bad! (I miss Paul tabone so much!)

Think of me (Christine) My heart was pounding as the piano started I was so eager and excited to hear Lucy safe to say she doesn’t disappoint she’s so radiant and has the voice of a bell, her cadenza is the movie cadenzas but higher and it was fantastic Think of me was much the same but again the set looked so bright and new it really was gorgeous, I absolutely love the new addition of the mini proscenium inside the outer one it frames the stage just beautifully! Rhys’ part was great aswell lovely voice :)

Angel of music - much the same again, the ballerinas have a bar where they practise upstage left which was a nice touch. Lyric change to -

Meg - “your face Christine, so strange”

Christine - “I’m changing Meg”

Meg - “No one’s changing”

In the third preview the lyrics changed to

Christine - “he’s with me even now”

Meg - “Your hands are cold”

Christine - “all around me”

Meg - “Christine are you alright”

Christine - “it frightens me”

Meg - “don’t be frightened”

So reverted back to something similar to the original lyrics! Ellie is a lovely Meg and her wig is auburn and it looks lovely!

Dressing room - everything the same

The mirror - everything the same again killian has a great voice and sounded very threatening! when the phantom brings Christine through the mirror Raoul calls out angel and instead of the title song beginning the music continues into a dramatic swell no where near as long as the restaged tour though.

Title song - Raoul leaves the dressing room as the title song begins and the ballerinas walk onstage congregate round Raoul and then they all walk off as Lucy and Killian appear on the bridge so no more doubles a bit of a restaged tour moment again I’m still to figure out how I felt. There seems to be extra set pieces like flat cutouts of staircases which move with the bridge which I really enjoyed, I think it added more depth to the stage.

The first preview the candles on the candelabras were poking out of the floor as they usually did and Lucy and killian appeared on the boat and however the candelabras didn’t rise which was confusing however they did in the third preview apparently it was a technical malfunction so I was very happy to see it fixed as the lair looked really bare without them.

I Have brought you - nothing different

Music of the night - mostly the same but it was like the phantom could put Christine to sleep when he sung close your eyes her eyes closed and she seemed to kind of lose consciousness it was a really nice touch to see how much control the phantom had over Christine. The catch is gone now :(

The morning after/ I remember - again the same

Stranger than you dreamt it - Lucy’s acting in this scene was just out of this world you can tell her Christine was absolutely horrified by the sight of the deformity and killian was fantastic!

Magical lasso - same as normal

Notes/ prima Donna - exact same as before except i don’t know if it was just me but the curtain behind the manager’s desk seemed a lot larger which was nice as it filled up a bit more of the empty space. Raoul wore a brown bow tie for this scene. Saori and Lily both were fantastic in prima donna would love to see lily again and will most likely be seeing Saori anyway in my upcoming visits. Rhys was really good in this song he was very clever and lovely belt. Francesca Ellis is definitely a standout in the show her voice is so unique unlike any other I’ve ever heard her acting is also 10/10! Managers I think could work on their timing for the comedic parts but that’s the only complaint Matt and Adam are great otherwise :)

Il Muto - lovely to see Manon Taris back on stage and James Hume and I want to say Hywel Dowsell were amusing to watch aswell! Saori and Edward court as Don Atillio were great Lucy was so cute as Serafimo!

The ballet - all the ballerinas were gorgeous! And the male ballet dancer was fantastic! Andre was trembling like crazy when trying to introduce the ballet and engaged with the audience quite a bit which was fun, the ballerinas screamed a lot when they noticed the phantoms shadow on the backdrop and the music had a build up behind the actual original score which made the reveal of buquet’s body more dramatic!

The Rooftop - Lucy looked gorgeous in her rooftop costume! She seemed genuinely distressed and her acting again just shone through, Rhys at the beginning was giving me Hadley Fraser/ restaged tour vibes coming off as dismissive of Christinebut he begins to soften Lucy’s soar was sublime probably one of the best I’ve heard it just floated from her!!!

All I ask of you - Rhys and Lucy had a lot of chemistry and she was beaming from ear to ear when Rhys sung to her. Beautifully done

All I ask of you reprise - the controversial Pegasus.... would it have been nice for the phantom to appear on top of the angel? Yes, is the Pegasus statue THAT bad absolutely not it was beautiful! Killian was fab! Loved the sustained note on “when he heard you siiiiiiinggggggggg” liked a lot!!!

CHANDELIER CRASH WAS SO COOL, killian appeared in box five and shot sparks from his staff essentially shooting the chandelier down. It crashed like it did in the original and swung really fast over the audience and made an explosion noise which was changed at the third preview the music sort of rumbled instead of the explosion which worked better as the explosion was rather odd since the chandelier didn’t collapse or like the restaged tour chandelier spew fake glass.

INTERVAL The blue curtain is GORGEOUS

[that-blue-vault-dweller]

Can you do a one shot story of the companions coming together to organize a surprise birthday party for Nora. I find it really funny to think of them having to interact and corporate with one another to make Nora happy. 😂😂😂

Awww!!! This is an incredible idea, and I absolutely love this so much!!! 😍😍😍🥰🥰🥰 I had an amazing time writing this one (as you can probably tell by the length of the thing 😂), and I hope you enjoy! Thank you so much for the request! 💙💛

Word Count: 3505

  “Hancock, if you put Day Tripper in those brownies, I will personally make sure that Blue has your head—”

  “Calm down some! I didn’t put any chill pills in the brownies, okay?!” Hancock replied, raising his hand up defensively before placing the pan on a nearby table. Piper just raised an eyebrow, unimpressed.

  Since Nora had left that morning with MacCready and Dogmeat, everyone had been moving as quickly as they could possibly manage with Piper at the helm of the preparation crew. It was February twelfth and the birthday of the vault-dweller. And they had to do everything they could to make Nora’s birthday as perfect as her.

  And if Hancock brought chems in, then it was definitely not going to be perfect by Piper’s or Nora’s standards.

  “Okay, then, prove it. Cait!!!” Piper called. She knew that Hancock would cave if Cait came over to try the brownies. After all, he respected Cait quitting the chems too much to let her risk a relapse.

  She could feel Cait’s glare on her back, and Piper resisted the urge to say something sarcastic as the redhead approached the two.

  “What do ye want?” Cait questioned, not much kindness mustered in her words as she glared at Piper. After all, they were not really the best of friends, and for Piper to ask anything of her was a bit of a stretch. The only reason Cait was helping with the party was because she loved and cared about Nora so much.

  “Go try those brownies.”

  “Why? This feels like a trick,” Cait spoke, crossing her arms over her chest as she narrowed her eyes skeptically. Piper barely withheld the groan as she put her hands on her hips and glared at the other woman.

  “We’re testing them to make sure they’re clean.”

  “And ye chose me?! Look, I’ve moved past my days of addiction, ye hear?!” Cait informed her aggressively before spinning on her heel and leaving Piper with Hancock. Piper rolled her eyes, moving her mouth a little as she mimicked the other woman.

  “Alright, then. Curie! Come taste these brownies!” Piper called, and Curie looked up immediately, her eyes sparkling with the promise of sweets.

  “Ooh! Okay!” Curie cried, hurrying over. Piper smirked widely, knowing that Hancock would not just let Curie get high. Especially since Nora would be positively livid if anything happened to the innocent synth.

  “No, no, no, on second thought, I think I might’ve burned them, and I probably should just throw them out. Nora deserves the best, right?” Hancock grinned winningly before heading out the door with the brownies. Curie stuck her lip out a little in a small, disappointed pout before returning to her previous task of cleaning up the house alongside Codsworth.

  “That’s what I thought,” Piper muttered, and she turned to look and see what Cait and Danse were doing together. Currently, the both of them were attempting to hang decorations, and Danse was looking slightly flustered as Cait grinned widely. Piper immediately knew what was going on as soon as she saw it.

  “No fraternizing in the workplace, got it?” Piper announced just behind them and Danse was almost pitiful in how he straightened immediately and cleared his throat in an attempt to look more proper. It was obviously a reaction left over from his time in the Brotherhood, and he quickly caught up on his mistake before releasing his shoulders a little and loosening.

  “Who died and made you queen, anyways?” Cait questioned, and Piper scoffed as if it were obvious.

  “Look, since I know Blue so well, I have been self-appointed as birthday party coordinator, alright?” Piper informed her. Piper mentally added in the fact that she believed that she herself was Nora’s best and closest friend out of the bunch, but she did not voice this opinion aloud since she would likely offend the rest of the people around the house.

  “The rest of us know her pretty well, too, y’know. I think you just want an excuse to boss me around!” Cait challenged, pushing the thumbtack into the wall firmly, and Piper just shrugged, everything in her fighting the urge to say something that would provoke the former cage-fighter.

  “Does this look balanced to you?” Danse questioned, and Piper squinted a little, tilting her head.

  “Yeah. Except Cait’s end looks too high and mighty,” Piper commented, and she mentally scolded herself for not having more self-control than to aggravate the other woman. But it was just too fun to resist, and Cait got so irritated which made it so funny.

  Sure enough, Cait looked like she might kill someone as she lowered her end ever so slightly.

  “Good enough, your highness?” Cait questioned, clenching her fists tightly and her face turning a little red as she quite obviously tried to resist the urge to deck Piper. Piper just offered a smug smile and a thumbs-up.

  She then headed over to check on Nick, Preston, and Deacon where they were working on wrapping the presents for Nora.

  “How’s it going, guys?” Piper questioned, looking over the gifts for Nora on the table. They had labeled all of them with the people who were gifting them on the bottom and Nora’s name on the side.

  “It’s going alright over here,” Deacon trailed off with a chuckle, looking over at Preston and the Minutemen shrugged a little with a grin.

  “Piper, are you playing nice with Cait?” Nick questioned, raising an eyebrow knowingly, and Piper just grinned winningly, squeezing Nick’s shoulder affectionately.

  “Oh, Nicky… When have I ever not played nice with the red-headed woodpecker?” Piper questioned much too innocently, and Nick rolled his eyes fondly, the barest of smiles pulling at the corners of his lips.

  “Behave yourself now,” Nick chastised half-heartedly, too much warmth in his voice to be taken too seriously about it. Piper just laughed a little.

  “I always do, Gramps,” Piper assured him with a wink and finger-guns.

  At that moment, X6 entered the house with the cake. Piper turned around just as he placed the cake on the counter and faced her.

  “I have completed the cake,” X6 announced, his voice completely calm as he wore an absolutely ridiculous apron. Piper had to search deep inside of herself to try to keep from laughing.

  She had seen Nora wear this apron on many occasions when she was cooking around Sanctuary, and Piper always poked fun at her when she saw her wearing it. Apparently, Nate had bought it for Nora back before the bombs fell and it had been such an ugly apron that no one had stolen it from Nora’s house during the entire time that she had been frozen.

  Of course, no one would want to steal a bright blue apron that had “Hot Mom Summer” written across the front of it.

  “Did the apron work out for you, X6?” Piper questioned, unable to help a bit of mirth leaking into her voice.

  “It performed its function properly, if that is what you mean. However, the aesthetic quality left a bit to be desired,” he very dryly replied. Piper just shrugged, chuckling a little.

  “Nice! So, did you put a sweet little message on top of the cake like I said?” Piper questioned, and she could hear Cait muttering something to herself somewhere behind Piper. Piper simply chose to ignore her for now, focusing on the courser before her.

  “Yes,” he replied simply, and she grinned widely, finding herself to be quite relieved since everything was going extremely well so far.

  “Did you cover it in frosting all over?” Piper asked, raising an eyebrow, and X6 hummed in agreement. She let out a breath of relief, very happy to see that things were going so well as of now.

  “Great! Let me see,” Piper spoke, moving over to look at the cake. To her pure, unadulterated horror, the cake was completely and barrenly white with a simple message in pretty lettering on top of the cake in blue letters.

  “‘Pleasant regards?!!!’ You’ve got to be kidding me!” Piper cried, her eyes wide as she looked at him as if he had suddenly sprouted two extra heads. She could feel the coolness of his gaze even behind the sunglasses he was wearing.

  “You did not make a specific request. Therefore, I put a kind message on the top as you said,” he replied, and it was so dry that she could not help but think he was being sarcastic.

  “If this is your idea of being funny, it is absolutely the worst time to start pulling that—”

  “Tiny human, Mack-Ree-Dee, and little dog are back!!!” Strong announced very loudly, sticking his head through the doorway as he bent over a little to fit. He had been outside waiting for Nora, MacCready, and Dogmeat’s return, and Piper had told him to let them all know when the group came back. Piper brought her hands up to the sides of her head, breathing deeply as she tried to hold it together.

  “Aww, well, that’s just wonderful!” Piper sarcastically declared in pure aggravation.

  “Okay, quick!!! You guys fix this cake! I’m going to try to get MacCready’s attention and see if he can distract her for a little longer,” Piper swiftly told them, and it was then that she noticed Hancock had re-entered the room after throwing his brownies outside behind the house.

  “And do not line the edge of the cake with mentats or something, Hancock!” Piper demanded, pointing an accusing finger at him before hurrying out the door and barely dodging Strong standing there. She quickly spotted the three heading up the road through Sanctuary slowly. They had just gotten off of the bridge. Nora was laughing at something that MacCready had said to her, and Dogmeat was happily trotting along ahead of them.

  Piper raised her arms up, waving to MacCready since Nora had just stopped to pat Dogmeat when he brought her a stick from nearby. He unfortunately was not looking. When he finally did happen to gaze in her direction, he just stared at her for a long moment, completely and utterly confused as she motioned to him.

  Very unfortunately, he still did not seem to get the message whatsoever. Piper just groaned loudly before looking around quickly, trying to find something that could throw Nora off and that would take up some time.

  It was then that she spotted strong standing nearby, just staring at her as if she were insane. Piper held back the grin that threatened to come onto her face and instead replaced it with a surprised look.

  “Strong! I think you better go see Nora! I’m not sure, but I think she found milk of human kindness!” Piper announced to him, and he looked at her strangely, moving his gaze between her and where Nora was standing in the distance.

  “Tiny human have milk of human kindness?!” Strong cried, growing quite excited, and Piper nodded swiftly.

  “Yes! Tiny human have milk of human kindness! You better go check!” Piper told him, gesturing in Nora’s direction, and Strong took off running in Nora’s direction to pester her about the nonexistent beverage.

  Piper sighed deeply with relief before hurrying inside to see how things were going with the cake.

  “How’s it looking?” Piper questioned quickly. X6 was just standing nearby, looking slightly irked as Hancock and Danse tried to shove each other out of the way to fix the cake. Deacon was trying to get around them to throw in his additions, and Cait had her arms crossed, her brow furrowed in some combo of frustration and nervousness. Codsworth and Curie were offering suggestions to the people fighting over the cake, and Preston just looked a little uncertain about the entire thing. Nick was propped up against the wall and watching the entire thing unfold.

  “It looks like the beginning of a disaster,” Nick commented dryly, and Piper made her way over, trying to shove Danse, Hancock, and Deacon away from the cake. For a long few moments, they did not even notice her.

  “Hey, hey, hey!!! Stop it!!! Let me see!!!” Piper yelled to get their attention. After much pushing, the three moved out of the way finally. Piper looked down at the cake, and she tilted her head to the side a bit as she looked down at the really strange cake before her.

  There was a pair of sunglasses on the front of the cake, lug nuts lining the edge of the cake on the plate it was sitting on, and a flower on the top positioned in such a way that it bordered the top of the word “Pleasant.”

  “Y’know… I’m not sure whether this is the weirdest cake I’ve ever seen or if it is literally the actual embodiment of Nora’s personality,” Piper finally spoke, and they all shrugged, honestly not too sure themselves.

  “Well, I hope it’s good enough, because I think we’re about out of time,” Nick informed them, as he looked out the window carefully.

  “Hide!” Piper quickly called in a whisper-yell, and they all tried to find a place to hide. Piper quickly turned off the lights that Nora had going in the house, turning the switch that connected the generator and the network of lights inside the house. She then took cover on the far edge of Nora’s couch where it was hidden from people coming in from the front doorway.

  Curie, Nick, and Codsworth hurried into the hallway, Curie peeking out just barely and one of Codsworth’s eyes poking out to watch the door. X6 left out the back door and Danse hurried out the back door with him, standing just around the side of the doorway. Hancock, Deacon, and Preston hid behind the island countertop nearby and Cait kneeled down nearby them.

  “Yeah, you’re right. I probably left it on the nightstand by my bed— Wow, it’s dark… I don’t remember turning the lights off before I left,” Nora trailed off, and Piper could hear the blue-clad woman feeling around in the dark for the switch that Piper had just turned off a few moments ago.

  As soon as the lights came on, everyone hiding jumped up and yelled surprise. Nora jumped out of her skin at first, falling back into MacCready as she instinctively placed her hand on the holster of her pistol. However, as her fight or flight instinct disappeared, a look of pure awe and joy overtook her, and she just looked around slowly.

  “Happy Birthday, Blue,” Piper told her, a giant smile on her face as she slowly approached the other woman. Nora was suddenly snapped out of her stupor, a giant grin coming onto her face as she wasted no time in closing the distance between her and Piper and wrapping her arms around the reporter tightly, burying her face in Piper’s shoulder as she squeezed her firmly against her.

  After a moment, Nora pulled away, just gazing at all of it as she marveled. Curie hurried over, latching onto her waist quickly, and Nora reciprocated the hug with a half-choked laugh before kissing the girl softly on top of her head. It was then that Piper realized her Blue was near tears.

  “What… When… How did you guys even come up with this?” Nora breathlessly questioned as she moved to the next person so she could hug them to. It just happened to be Nick. Piper shrugged, chuckling a bit as she hooked her fingers in the belt loops of her trench coat.

  “Well, we told MacCready to get you out of the house and keep you out there for a while, and we all busted our rears to get everything together for you,” Piper expressed, and just as Nora latched onto Cait, she pointed in MacCready’s direction with a watery smile.

  “You, sir, are a huge liar. Your scope was definitely not off all those times, and you do not exclusively pee in hubflower bushes, do you?!” Nora cried with a loud laugh that was somewhere closer to a sob as Cait crushed her in her arms, those bony limbs wrapping around Nora tightly as Nora rocked with her a bit and waved a scolding finger at MacCready. He just grinned sheepishly, shrugging. Piper scoffed as she raised an eyebrow at the man.

  “Seriously? Peeing in hubflower bushes?” Piper questioned as Nora continued to make her rounds and hug absolutely everyone there. She next went for Codsworth and quickly after that latched onto Preston.

  “Hey, you told me to distract her by any means necessary, and you wouldn’t believe how long it takes to find a hubflower bush out in the middle of the wastes,” MacCready admitted with a small laugh. Nora had embraced Danse, Deacon, and Hancock during his statement.

  Nora shook her head, finally hugging X6 against his will.

  “I just… Wow, I don’t even know what to say, you guys… Thank you so much,” Nora laughed, sniffing hard as she wiped at her eyes carefully, her hand squeezing X6’s shoulder.

  Piper just grinned widely, looking down at the floor self-consciously before looking back up at the woman. Piper could tell that Nora knew Piper had been the one at the helm of the entire thing, and Piper treasured the soft, adoring gaze that was thrown in her direction especially.

  “Well, then don’t say anything at all! We’ve got gifts and lots of them!” Deacon told her with a laugh, gesturing to the giant pile all over the kitchen table. Nora’s eyes went wide and she somehow looked even more deeply touched than she was before.

  “Monsieur Deacon, let us show Madame the cake first, oui?” Curie suggested excitedly, and Nora turned around, looking for the cake as she looked as if she might cry all over again.

  “You guys actually made a cake?”

  “X6 baked it,” Piper informed her, coming closer to her best friend as Hancock reached over for the cake on the counter behind Danse. “And Danse, Hancock, and Deacon put some really weird spin on the whole thing as far as decorating it goes.”

  As soon as Nora saw it, she looked somewhere between laughing at the sheer ridiculousness of it and crying from the tenderness of the whole thing. She placed a hand over her mouth, just staring as her shoulders shook. She finally released a sharp bark of laughter, and everyone could not help but chuckle quite a bit over the silly cake.

  “‘Pleasant Regards’ was the moron’s idea,” Cait pointed at X6 as she explained in her usual gruff manner, and Nora just laughed and smiled widely as she looked at him. He did not provide an outward response.

  “When I was instructed to put a kind message on the cake in distinguished lettering, I was not given specific requirements,” he explained calmly, and Nora just laughed even harder.

  “I absolutely love it. You could’ve written literally anything on it, and I would’ve been happy,” Nora expressed wholeheartedly, and the sad thing was that Piper knew that was the absolute truth. Nora was always so happy with even the slightest shows of kindness and that was one of the many things that Piper loved about her best friend.

  “So, sister, do you want to eat some cake or do you want to open some presents first?” Hancock questioned with a smile, and Nora looked a little guilty as she eyed the cake.

  “I hate to mess up this beautiful cake… But I’m honestly kind of hungry,” Nora chuckled a little, sheepishly smiling at the group.

  “Don’t worry. Cakes are made to be eaten,” Danse assured her in that deep, stoic voice. However, his tone was filled with warmth as he looked at the woman. She flashed him an affectionate glance.

  “Well, why can’t she have both? She can eat cake and open presents at the same time, right?” MacCready suggested, and everyone quickly agreed, the entire bunch excited for her to see their gifts to her.

  “Alright! Let’s do it!” Nora agreed with a shrug, but the thrilled look in her eye betrayed her true feelings.

  “Let’s do sing ‘Happy Birthday!’” Codsworth called out, and everyone paused in their migration to surround the kitchen table. There was a collective sigh, but everyone cleared their throats before starting the song.

   Piper almost could not sing for the huge grin threatening to overtake her face as she lovingly looked at her best friend who was just basking in the love that her new found family held for her. As Piper and the group sang the last bit, Nora’s eyes met Piper’s and Nora just smiled softly at her, mouthing a thank you to Piper as her gaze practically glowed with tenderness and lovingness. Piper stopped singing for a moment to mirror her best friend’s expression.

  Piper had succeeded. Although it was not completely perfect, her Blue was getting all of the love she deserved.

  And that was all Piper needed and wanted for her.

[heliads]

Lieutenant Lovesick

Y/N L/N is an officer of the datatech division at the Resistance Base, someone who has an unfortunate tendency to crush on the rebels’ favorite flyboy. Poe Dameron needs someone to help him decode new intel, so of course he looks to her.

masterlist

The ship is starting to touch down now. If you look closely, you can just see the dark crop of hair on the pilot, catch a glimpse of a fierce grin through the windscreen. Already, mechanics and nav crew members are rushing towards the X-Wing, trying to see if Poe Dameron has managed to finally screw up one space mission and give them something to fix on his ship. You doubt they’ll be that fortunate- Poe’s one of the best pilots. That’s just how it works, even if it means the mechanics have a lot less to do.

Poe stands up, climbing down the side of his X-Wing and checking to make sure his BB unit is being pulled out as well. He exchanges a few words with an overeager intel agent already pressing him for news on the latest mission, then starts heading through the crowd in the hangar bay. You hesitate for one second more, two, then turn away and start heading down the corridors of the Resistance base.

If you’re lucky, you have just left yourself enough time to get back to your station before anyone notices that you've stepped away. However, it does not appear that the galaxy is on your side today. Tela, your best friend, reaches out an arm in front of the door just as you attempt to head back into the room with your fellow officers. She raises an eyebrow at you. “Gawking at Dameron again?”

Your cheeks flame as you hurriedly glance around the corridor, making sure no one can hear you. “I have no idea what you’re talking about.” Tela flashes you a victorious grin. “No? You weren’t in the hangar, trying to catch a glimpse of Poe Dameron as he returns from his latest space cruise for General Organa? What else were you doing?” You smile feebly. “I was, uh, patrolling the area?”

Tela laughs. “You’re ridiculous.” You grin broadly at that. “Maybe. But weren’t you the one who just happened to keep stopping by the med bay to check on Finn?” Tela’s jaw drops. “I know you’re not bringing that up right now. We’re bullying you, not me.” A voice from behind you makes you straighten up in panic. “I thought bullying was against Resistance policy.”

When you turn around, Poe is standing behind you. Of course it’s Poe. Of course. You wonder how much of the conversation he heard, and you can only hope that he conveniently missed the part where Tela was making fun of you for crushing on him. You realize Poe’s looking at you like he’s expecting an answer. “It’s less bullying and more mild teasing. I’m just noticing how often Tela visits the med bay, even when she’s not injured.”

Tela stares at you with unabashed outrage, but a grin slides its way across Poe’s face. “Actually, I think I know what you mean. Didn’t I see you in there a couple standard hours ago?” You turn to face Tela with new interest. “Wait, I didn’t know about this. You didn’t tell me you left.” Poe nods with mock concern. “It was right when Finn was there for a checkup, too.”

You look back at him. “Did they speak?” Poe returns your conspiratorial gaze. “I don’t think so. A few waves were exchanged.” You incline your head in acceptance. “I think that’s the best we can get.” Poe mirrors your serious expression. “I think so too, officer. See you around.” With that, he issues a wave of his own before heading off down the corridor once more, presumably to go report back to General Organa.

Tela hardly waits for him to disappear around the corner before she turns to you, eyes wide. “Look at you go! I think that was the first interaction you’ve had in weeks. I almost believed you weren’t staring at him mournfully a few minutes ago.” You swat her shoulder. “It wasn’t like that. He approached me.” Tela jumps back from your blow, pretending to rub her arm in pain. “Hey, you can’t hit me. I just sacrificed my humiliation over the med bay so you two could smirk together like you were best friends.”

You smile at her, clasping your hands together over your heart and eliciting a laugh. “And what a sacrifice it was. Your name will go down among the Resistance heroes for all eternity.” Tela chuckles. “So will yours. Y/N L/N, spoke with Poe Dameron once and will never forget it for the rest of her life.” When you move to swat her again, Tela is ready and dodges out of the way.

You’ve almost made it down the corridor when you hear someone calling your name. You look around, slightly annoyed at this interruption, but any trace of irritation vanishes instantly from your face when you realize who’s jogging down the hallway towards you. Poe Dameron, back at it again. You haven’t talked to him in a couple of days, ever since that incident with Tela. You’re not sure that incident is exactly the right word, but it’s close enough. It felt incidental to you.

Poe comes to a stop beside you, breathing erratic from running across the Resistance base. A casual grin spreads across his face, as easy as starting a program on your navicomputer. “So, how’s my favorite Lieutenant Commander of the Datatech Division?” You raise an eyebrow, unable to hide a smile. “Since when have you known my full title? I’m pretty sure only Tela’s bothered to memorize it.” Poe’s grin stalls a second, almost as if he’s embarrassed. Then the smile returns, full force and strong as a laser bolt.

“I make it a point to know all the pretty girls on this side of the galaxy, L/N. That list just happens to include you.” You roll your eyes, but can’t help feeling your heart do a slow roll in your chest. “So, did you jog across the base for anything other than some mild flattery?” Poe presses a hand to his heart in mock dismay. “Oh, it’s always more than mild. But yes, Lieutenant, I did. I need someone who’s tech savvy to help me decode some files.”

You fold your arms across your chest. “And here I thought you wanted me for something interesting. Any space jockey with half a brain can decode files.” Poe’s eyes linger on yours for a little longer than usual. “And what if this space jockey just wanted your company?” You let the question hang in the air for a second, then reply. “Then I’ll do it, but he’ll need a better excuse next time.” Poe’s grin could split the sun. Stars, you’re in over your head.

“That’s the best thing I’ve heard all day. Meet me by the eastern side of base at ten standard hours tomorrow? That’s when the data finishes transmitting.” You nod. “I’ll be there.” “I’m looking forward to it.” Poe flashes you one last grin before disappearing down an adjacent corridor. You watch him as he goes. What are you getting yourself into?

You might have reservations, some last ounce of common sense that tells you not to run headlong into danger with this man. Yet you find yourself at the east corner of the base at ten standard hours, just as promised, although the designated meeting spot is empty of anyone save you. This is what you get for letting your heart run wild, you tell yourself, so you shouldn’t be surprised. You’re just a lieutenant to him, remember? Just a job.

Your fears are confirmed when you see Poe turn onto your hallway, talking with another girl. You know her from the intel division- Lian Kos, about as pretty as she is good with a star cruiser. Needless to say, she’s devastatingly attractive, and it comes as no surprise that Poe is deep in conversation with her. You can feel your heart shrinking in your chest, trying to hide itself away from this unwelcome truth that Poe is only playing with you.

However, you might just be kidding yourself, because you swear that the second Poe turns his head and sees you, his eyes light up in something almost like relief. His strides lengthen as he rushes over to you, muttering a quick goodbye to a more than slightly displeased Lian. The girl is forced to turn down another hallway, still evidently bitter over this quick goodbye.

You raise an eyebrow, unable to let it go. “What, did she insult your flying skills? I haven’t seen someone run that far from Lian since she accidentally shot a trainee in the arm during blaster practice.” Poe chuckles at that. “I didn’t want to be late. We’re doing very important work, you hear? The Resistance is crucial.” You barely hold back a snort. “I didn’t realize Resistance work was so important that you had to drop anyone in sight like you’ve been sliced by a vibroblade.”

Poe’s eyes twinkle with laughter, and for a second you feel like you’ve been caught in the crossfire. “Maybe I just wanted to see you.” Your words dry up on your tongue. He’s just joking, you know that, but something about the way he says it makes you almost think he’s telling the truth, that Poe Dameron would really cast aside a woman like Lian Kos for someone like you. Then the reality of the situation comes crashing back down around you, and you remember that something like that would never happen.

You force your smile back onto your cheeks. “And maybe I want to get this over with so I can go back to my station. Resistance work is important, right?” You might just be looking for excuses, but you swear that Poe looks almost disappointed by this.

Poe’s intel is actually pretty interesting. You hate to admit it after you made fun of him yesterday, but the decoding process is fairly difficult and it takes all of your focus to complete. That being said, you can’t help but notice the way Poe’s eyes linger on your face as you scan the files, or the way his gaze dances between your fingers as you work. It’s as if he’s never seen anyone quite like you before, and he’s taking the chance to truly look at you as if committing your very being to memory. It makes you want to look closer at him, to rethink all the certainties you’d propped up between you and the flyboy standing before you.

At last, the work is done and you’re free to go. You save the last file, turning to hand the datapad back to Poe so he can report to General Organa and be done with the project. However, his hands linger on yours, and he doesn’t accept the datapad right away. When he speaks again, his voice is soft. “I did need you, you know.” For some reason, you get the feeling that he isn’t just talking about the decoding, or the Resistance work, or anything like that at all. You have the strangest impression that he’s talking about the way he feels about you.

You’re afraid to say anything lest you break this moment, like a single word spoken will shatter the quiet of the room or dispel the blinking lights of the diagrams and navicomputers all around you. Poe looks back at you, and you swear he looks almost nervous. That can’t be right- practically perfect starfighter pilot Poe Dameron, the Resistance worker everybody swears by, nervous over you? It feels impossible.

Yet he still stands before you, shifting on his feet, not quite ready to speak again but utterly unwilling to leave. You move before you realize it, unable to take the silent pressure that you should be doing something. When you kiss him, you think it’s the worst mistake you’ve ever made. It certainly makes the blood rush through your head in a way you’ve only experienced during a street brawl against the First Order, when they’re shooting at you as you run and the adrenaline is coursing through your veins. This is how it feels to kiss Poe- not a soft moment, but a firestorm.

Then he’s kissing you again, datapad shoved onto a nearby table so he can wrap his hands around your waist and pull you close. You stay there for a day, maybe a year, or possibly only a couple of seconds. It feels like an eternity or like it barely happened at all. When you break away, you hesitate, still afraid to look up and condemn yourself to whatever emotion will be waiting in his eyes. After a heartbeat, two, you give in and look at him again.

He’s smiling. It’s a soft smile, one you don’t think you’ve seen in a while. He usually puts up this front of classic, confident soldier, a pilot who’s seen impossible odds and never been shaken by it. He wears the smile of a wolf, a leader, an actor. This is a wholly different smile- his, at last. Something that hasn’t yet been taken from him by the war.

His voice is quiet in the stillness of the room. “You keep surprising me, lieutenant.” You can’t help but share in his smile, feeling a giddy rush bubble up in your chest. “I intend to make it a habit.” His hand laces around yours, still unwilling to let you go quite yet. “That sounds good to me.”