#hurt!jensen ackles series

[thesilmarillionblog]

𓏲 𓂃 L o s i n g Y o u

Series Masterlist is here.

Summary: Everything was good as a member of Payback and Soldier Boy's secret girlfriend until the team and your relationship with him began to fall apart due to a new member and her developing relationship with Ben right in front of your eyes.

Pairing: Soldier Boy / Reader

Warnings: Heavy angst, hurt, heartless Soldier Boy, reader gets hurt, mention of violence, mention of drugs, betrayal, Soldier Boy being a dick, reader is a supe, Crimson Countess is a bitch

Word Count: 1796

A/N: English is not my first language.

* This story is inspired by the song "Losing You" by Dream Evil.

“Get lost fuckface and bring me a coffee,” Ben said telling the the poor guy who was trying his best to make Soldier Boy happy till the broadcast start.

The announcement of the new Payback member to the American public was scheduled for today. The company's executives had already made the decision to bring on a new employee, despite the fact that the team already had enough members. Everyone on the team opposed this idea, with the exception of Soldier Boy and you, but nothing changed.

You didn't mind if a new person joined the team because they were assigning Soldier Boy all tasks, regardless of importance, and you could see he was growing more and more irate with each passing day. Given that Black Noir was the team's second-strongest member, it was obvious Soldier Boy didn't appreciate the concept of being used for insignificant tasks constsantly. It was obvious that the team definitely required one more strong member.

“You don’t have to be so rude to those people,” you murmered as you approached Ben. "They are all scared of you already.”

Ben chuckled as he sat down and sniffed the white dust, saying, “I am not familiar with the concept of princess treatment, sweetheart, and nobody respects a pussy leader; keep that in mind.”

You sighed knowing he would never change his attitude just because you told him to. He pulled you to his lap and gave you a quick and firm kiss, silencing you before you argue with him.

All of you were taken aback when a new supe was introduced because you hadn't seen her before. She smiled and gave a short but impactful speech about how she would benefit America and its citizens. She looked nice and strong with her red suit and long red hair.

You were only made to feel worse by the fact that everyone was rooting for Soldier Boy and Crimson Countess every day, and their fan base became stronger over time. The current Crimson Countess stood on the side where you used to stand. They were singing together in ads while standing side by side and hand in hand, which was keeping you up at nights. The growing distance between you and Ben was eating you alive.

He hardly ever visited or spoke to you during the day, despite the fact that he used to spend the night with you in the past. There were moments when you tried to talk to him about what was going on, but he waved you off right away, saying he had things to do and couldn't be seen with any other woman but the Countess.

You were frequently questioned about their relationship, and you smiled while telling the cameras that they were lucky to have found each other and that they were strong together. If only they were aware of your true feelings.

Even though Ben continued to treat Noir rudely, which greatly upset and angered you, the rest of the crew was glad that Soldier Boy had finally become distracted. This was because they had been mistreated and bullied by him less than in the past. You two had heated disagreements over Noir as well in the past, but Ben consistently ignored your emotions and ideas. Now that Crimson also supported him about how he should treat the team made your blood boil with hatred and agony.

Noir remarked, removing his mask, “I can't do this, Y/N. I refuse to bow to him and put up with the way he treats me.”

You walked up to him and touched his back to get him to turn to face you. “What do you mean?” you questioned.

“I’m saying he is not worthy of being a leader.” Noir paced violently and stated, “All he does is get high with Crimson and bully me and everyone around him. He left you aside too.”

Though you knew he didn’t mean to hurt you, his words cut deep and silenced you for a second.

“Don’t do something crazy, Noir. You hear me?” You asked, ignoring his thoughts about Ben leaving you. “You know his short temper.”

Noir was always kind and kind, so you were surprised to see him so furious, but you knew he was right about everything, and Ben seemed to be getting worse and more distant every day as his connection with Countess took shape right before your eyes. You seemed to be deceiving yourself all along when you told yourself that their relationship wasn't real.

“I don’t know. Someone must do something about this.”

“You don’t stand a chance against him,” you said as you grasped his arms tightly. “I’ll talk to him, okay. I’ve got this, I promise.”

Noir gave you a nod before he put the mask on, leaving you alone with your thoughts.

You waited patiently until you learned Ben would be alone tonight because Crimson would be going on a mission. Your heart raced when you entered his house without saying anything. He must have heard the noises you made already, because he turned to you immediately and did not look surprised to see you.

“Hi,” you whispered, not knowing how to react around him anymore.

“What the fuck are you doing here?” he asked as he sat down in the coach after. He was high on cocaine.

As you walked up to him, you gave him a disappointed expression, but the way he looked stopped you. In the past, you were close every second, but those days are long in the past now.

“What’s wrong with you?” Your eyes were watery as you asked. It seemed like you would explode at any moment.

“Are fucking on your period? Why so sensitive?” His smile infuriated you, and he laughed as if something amusing had happened. There was something very punchable about his face.

“Why do you still treat Noir like a fucking jackass? He follows your instructions to the letter, and you are simply being disrespectful to him and the team as a whole.” You spoke angrily, as if you wanted him to share your feelings of rage. You wanted to wipe that foolish smile off his face.

His body abruptly shifted, giving you a menacing glance and raising his finger in your direction. “Don't fucking give me some advise. Who the fuck are you? You do realize that I am the fucking boss here, don't you?”

He hasn't been this angry with you in a long time, so you were surprised by his harsh remarks. It seemed like he hated you as he spat those words.

You yelled back, “I don't even know the man I'm talking to anymore,” at which point your tears finally fell. “Since Crimson entered your life, you have changed, Ben. She fucking hates you; she doesn't even love you. Don’t you see it?”

He was eventually enraged by your screams at him, and he stood in front of you with hate in his eyes. Your heart pained when you saw him staring at you like that, with eyes full of anger and fury.

“Do you know what I'm going to do?” He asked softly, as if he were just saying something kind. “I'm fucking gonna kill that masked pussy Noir and fucking make sure you watch through it.”

His cold words frozen you, and your eyes widened seeing he meant every word he said.

You shoved him away by his chest and sobbed, “If you ever touch Noir, I swear I'll cut Countess’ bitch head and throw it to your fucking thick skull.”

You were aware that nothing or no one could stop Ben from doing what he wanted to do, and that you might be the reason Noir was put to death or anything like. Your pulse raced upon witnessing Ben's unexpected outburst of rage against Noir.

Judging by his face, it was clear he was taken aback by your sharp words. You’ve never talked in athreatening way before with anyone. Your sigh and sobbing were the only things that filled the pregnant silence in the room.

“Ben,” you said softly, trying to reach again one more time, and you touched his face, hoping he wouldn’t push your hands back. To your surprise, he didn’t make a move. You looked him into the eyes between your tears and said, “I am the only one who truly loves you. Not her, not anyone else. Just me. What happened to us?”

You waited for him to answer you after you gave him a firm kiss, showing your love and care for him, but he didn’t kiss you back. Instead, he pushed your hands away from his face, with an unreadable look on his face.

“Why are you being selfish?” he asked, breaking the silence, almost irritated by your kindness toward him. “People love seeing me and her together. Duty fucking comes first.”

“You don’t owe love to her just to be loved by people you don’t even know,” you said, trying to convince him he didn’t have to do something he didn’t want to.

“How the fuck do you know I’m doing this for people only?”

“What do you mean?” you asked, as your heart skipped for a moment.

“Maybe I’m fed up with your soft attitude, and I want to be with her. How about that?” He said he was giving you an insidious smile.

With a heavy heart, you stepped back from him as more tears dropped from your cheeks. There was no point trying to convince Ben for your love while he didn’t give a fuck about it at all and the one he wanted was actually Countess.

“Is that what you want?”

“It fucking is,” he said, sitting down in the coach and keeping sniffing cocaine, like the conversation meant nothing to him and he wanted you to be gone.

Before leaving his house, you turned him one last time, saying, “She’ll betray you, Ben. I don’t know if I see that day, but you’ll see it.”

Next Chapter

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A/N: Well, that was a one shot, but let me know if you think that I should make it multi-chapters. Comments are appreciated, hehehe. <33

[zepskies]

Series Masterlist - Take Me Home

Pairing: Beau Arlen x F. Reader 

Summary: You are another lost soul at Sunny Day Excursions. You’re aiming to settle in Helena, Montana, where Beau Arlen is the new sheriff in town. But you both have a past you’re running from. 

AN: Welcome to my first ever Big Sky series! This is set towards the beginning of season 3.

Series Tags/Warnings: (**18+ only!) Angst and grief/trauma, PTSD, canon murder mystery, eventual smut.

🎵 Listen While You Read: The TMH Music Playlist (YouTube)

Chapters:

Part 1: All of Her Days

Part 2: It's Not Right, But It's Okay

Part 3: Welcome Home

Part 4: A Past & Future Thing

Part 5: Not That Simple

Part 6: A Man or a Coward

Part 7: On the Edge of a Knife

Part 8: Take Me Home

Part 9: A Choice to Make

Series complete!

Bonus One-Shots:

A Good Man Is Hard to Find** When Beau starts pulling away from you and Emily during a very difficult case, will the pressure make or break your relationship?

A Crime of Passion** When Beau Arlen decides to “make it up to you,” he’s damn thorough.

S.I.N.G.** Beau wishes you’d take this self-defense lesson a little more seriously.

Echoes Beau has another rough night, but you help him face a harder truth.

Ko-Fi Me ☕

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Series Tag List:

Comment below if you’d like to be tagged in this series!

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[cheynovak]

Sugar - Part 7  The final chapter

Soldier boy x F/ reader  (Y/N)       

Warnings: 18+, sex, age difference, anger, hurst, angst, happy ending...

Side note: English isn’t my first language.          

*Does not follow The Boys storyline * 

--      

Y/N is a college student who pays her apartment, bills and school tuition with the money she makes as ‘sugar baby’ for Soldier boy. What started as just being a companion on lonely moments became quickly more physical.     But how will Y/N cope with the dominant side of Ben when he finds out she has a life beside pleasuring him?    

-- 

Ben watched the door close in his face, rain started pouring down on him, the finality of Y/N's words echoing in his mind.

He had lost her, and the weight of that realization crushed him. He stood there for a long time, unable to move, his heart aching with regret and sorrow. Eventually, he turned away. 

The next few weeks blurred together in a haze of pain and self-destruction. Ben couldn't bear the emptiness that Y/N's absence left in his life, and he turned to anything that might dull the ache. He started drinking even more heavily, spending his nights in bars, downing shot after shot in an attempt to forget his pain. 

But alcohol wasn't enough to drown out the memories of her smile, her laughter, the warmth of her touch. Desperate for a deeper escape. It started with adding an extra few lines of cocaine, then escalated to pills and other substances. The highs were fleeting, but for a brief moment, they allowed him to escape the torment of his own thoughts. 

His downward spiral continued to deepen as he sought solace in the arms of other women. He frequented seedy motels and cheap escorts, trying to fill the void that Y/N had left. But no amount of meaningless sex could replace what he had lost, and each morning he woke up feeling even more hollow and broken than before. 

One night, as Ben stumbled out of yet another bar, high and barely coherent, he pulled out his phone and dialled the number of the only person he could think of. It rang a few times before a groggy voice answered. "What the hell, man? It's 3 AM." 

-- 

The next morning, Ben woke up on Legend's couch, feeling the effects of his latest binge. His head pounded, and his body ached, but the worst pain was the emotional one. Legend sat nearby, watching him with a mix of concern and anger. 

"You look like hell," Legend said bluntly. "How much did you take? No fuck that, what did you do?" 

Ben took a deep breath, trying to steady himself. "I messed up, Legend. I lost her. Legend sighed, shaking his head. " You need to get your shit together. She is just a girl, you’ll find another one.”  

Ben didn’t even listen, drowning in self-pity. 

One evening, Ben found himself back at Legend's place, as they sat in the dimly lit living room, the atmosphere felt heavy with unspoken tension. "So, what's next for you, man?" Legend asked, taking a swig of his whiskey.  

Ben hesitated, then said, "I’m going to try and talk to Y/N. Apologize. Try to make things right." 

Legend scoffed, shaking his head. "Forget about her, Ben. She's just another girl, a pussy to fuck. You don't need to go chasing after some chick who can't handle you. "Ben's expression darkened, his jaw clenching. "She's not just another girl.” 

Legend rolled his eyes. "Seriously, man? Get over it. There are plenty of girls out there. You can find another one to screw." 

The crude dismissal of Y/N as nothing more than a sexual object snapped something inside Ben. Before he knew it, he was on his feet, grabbing Legend by the collar and slamming him against the wall. His hand clamped around Legend's neck, his grip tight and unyielding. 

"Don't you ever talk about her like that," Ben growled, his voice low and dangerous. "She's more than that. She's worth more than.” 

Legend's eyes widened with shock and fear. He struggled to breathe, his hands clawing at Ben's arm. "Ben... let go..." Ben's eyes blazed with fury, but after a few tense seconds, he released his hold and stepped back, his chest heaving with anger. Legend crumpled to the floor, gasping for air. 

"What's wrong with you, man?" Legend sputtered, rubbing his neck. "You need to calm the hell down." 

Ben glared at him. "I won't let anyone talk about her like that. Not even you." Legend looked up at him, still shaken. "I... I didn’t mean anything by it. I was just trying to help you move on." Ben shook his head leaving his penthouse.  

Legend was nursing his bruised ego and neck. He couldn't shake the confrontation from his mind. He knew Ben was serious about Y/N, but he still thought it was all unnecessary drama. Deciding to take matters into his own hands before Ben would do stupid things he couldn’t fix, he picked up his phone and dialled Y/N's number.  

"Hello?" Y/N's voice came through, cautious and guarded. 

"Y/N, it's The Legend," he said, his tone attempting to sound friendly. "I think we need to talk. It's about Ben." 

"What about him?" she asked, suspicion clear in her voice. 

"Look, he’s been going through a rough time, and I know he wants to make things right with you. He just left my place.” 

“Did he made you call me?” He heard how displeased she was. 

“No, no he doesn’t know I was calling you, but he really cares about you. Can you please give him a chance?" 

Y/N sighed. "Legend, I appreciate the concern. But this isn't something you can fix with a phone call." 

"I get that," Legend replied, "He's trying... to be better. Just... hear him out, okay?" 

There was a long pause before Y/N responded. "I'll think about it. But Legend, this is between Ben and me. Please stay out of it." 

"Understood," he said, ending the call. 

-- 

A few days later. 

Ben found himself alone in his apartment, as he sat on the couch, lost in thought, a knock at the door pulled him from his thoughts. He wasn't expecting anyone, and a flicker of anxiety ran through him as he approached the door. When he opened it, his heart skipped a beat. 

Y/N stood there, looking determined yet slightly apprehensive. Ben blinked, unable to hide his surprise. "Y/N? What are you doing here?" 

"I'm ready to talk," she said simply, her voice steady. Ben stepped aside to let her in, his mind racing. She entered the apartment, taking a moment to look around before settling on the edge of the couch. Ben joined her, keeping a respectful distance. 

"I wasn't sure I would see you anymore," he admitted, his voice low. "I wasn't sure either," Y/N replied, her gaze meeting his. Ben nodded, his heart pounding while they sat down on the couch again. 

She took a deep breath, gathering her thoughts. "I need to understand why things went the way they did. Why you pushed me away, why you hurt me?” 

Ben ran a hand through his hair, feeling the weight of her words. "I was scared," he finally confessed. “Why?” she asked, she saw how difficult it was for him to answer. “I think I deserve this, Ben.”  

"I was terrified of not being enough for you, of not living up to your expectations. So I pushed you away before you could see how flawed I am.” Y/N listened, her expression softening slightly. "Ben, I never expected you to be perfect. I know your flaws.” 

As they sat in a moment of comfortable silence, Ben's curiosity got the better of him. He wanted to know how Y/N was really doing, beyond their complicated relationship. "How's school going?" he asked gently, hoping to steer the conversation into safer territory. 

Y/N's expression immediately shifted, her eyes welling up with tears. She looked down at her hands, trying to compose herself. "It's been... hard," she admitted, her voice trembling. "Ever since our fight, people have been treating me differently. They make jokes, call me names... they treat me like a whore." 

Ben's heart sank, guilt crashing over him like a tidal wave. "Y/N, I'm so sorry. I had no idea... I never meant for any of this to happen." She wiped at her eyes, trying to hold back the tears. 

She looked at him, her eyes filled with a mixture of sadness and vulnerability. "Ben, I don't blame you, not entirely... We both made mistakes. But it hurts, and... I don't know how to make it stop." Her tears started to stream down her cheeks. 

Ben reached out, taking her hand in his. Wanting nothing more than to pull her close to him, comforting her. 

Y/N looked up, meeting Ben's gaze, and saw something soft and tender in his eyes. The vulnerability and care reflecting, it made her heart ache with a confusing mix of emotions. She couldn't hold his gaze for long, feeling overwhelmed by the depth of his expression. 

His hand, warm and firm, enveloped hers, offering both comfort and connection. The weight of the world seemed to lighten just a bit with his touch. Ben's green eyes remained gentle, filled with an unspoken promise of support and understanding. It was a look she hadn't seen in a long time, one that made her feel safe and cherished despite everything. 

But also, one he would hide away every change he had, but not today, no it seemed like he was purposely showing her the man behind the armour.  

Without thinking, Y/N leaned in, resting her head against his shoulder, in the crook of his neck. She closed her eyes, breathing in his familiar scent, woodsy, but clean, a fragrance that had always brought her a sense of peace. 

Ben's arm instinctively wrapped around her, holding her close. The gesture was tender, protective, and Y/N felt a sense of calm wash over her. For a moment, all the hurt and chaos of the past weeks faded away, leaving just the two of them in their little bubble of comfort. 

And then for the first time in his life Ben said, "I'm so sorry for everything, Y/N," he whispered, his voice thick with emotion. "I wish I could take back all the pain I've caused you." She nuzzled deeper into his neck, feeling the steady rise and fall of his breath. 

He tightened his hold on her, his heart swelling with a mix of hope and regret. "I promise I'll do better.” 

After what felt like an eternity, Ben gently kissed the top of Y/N's hair. The simple gesture sent a rush through her veins, igniting a spark that had been dimmed by their past pain. She could feel his breath against her scalp, warm and steady, grounding her in the present moment. 

Without thinking, her lips moved over the vein on his neck, not quite kissing but caressing his skin with soft, delicate brushes. She could feel his pulse quicken beneath her touch, a subtle thrum that mirrored the rising tempo of her own heartbeat. His breath hitched, and she felt the slight tremor in his body, a mixture of anticipation and restraint. 

His hand moving to cradle the back of her head, fingers tangling in her hair. He was torn between the urge to pull her closer and the need to respect her boundaries, uncertain of how far she wanted to go. The intimate connection between them was both exhilarating and fragile, a delicate balance of longing and hesitation. 

"Y/N," he whispered, his voice barely audible, filled with a blend of desire and caution. "You don't have to..." But she interrupted softly, lifting her head to meet his gaze. Her eyes were dark with emotion.  "I want to, but I need to know we're on the same page, Ben. That this isn't just a moment." 

“Tell me it’s not just physical.” she pleads. 

Ben cupped her face gently, his thumb brushing across her cheek. "It’s not just a moment," he assured her, his voice steady and sincere. "I want you, Y/N. Not just physical.” 

Her heart swelled at his words, the sincerity in his eyes melting away the last remnants of doubt. She leaned in closer, her lips brushing against his in a tentative, tender kiss. Ben responded with equal tenderness, deepening the kiss with a careful intensity that spoke volumes. His hands moved to her waist, pulling her closer as if afraid she might slip away.  

Y/N's hands moved to the back of his neck, fingers threading through his hair. The simple, intimate contact sent shivers down both their spines. Their breaths mingled, creating an electric atmosphere between them. Tongues asking permission to tango.  

Feeling a surge of need and urgency, Ben gently pulled her onto his lap. Y/N straddled him, her legs resting on either side of his hips. The closeness intensified the heat rushing between them, a connection they'd been craving for so long.  

His hands roamed from her thighs up to her back, drawing her even closer, while her fingers played with the strands of his hair, earning a soft groan from him. 

Their eyes locked, communicating a myriad of emotions without words. The world outside ceased to exist as they lost themselves in each other's presence. Ben leaned in, Y/N responded eagerly, deepening the kiss as her hands slid down to his shoulders, feeling the strength beneath his shirt. 

Ben's hands moved from her back to her hips, gripping them firmly but gently, guiding her movements as she felt his bulge growing underneath the fabric of his pants. The sensation of her warmth against him was intoxicating, driving him to explore further.  

He broke the kiss momentarily, trailing soft kisses along her jawline and down her neck, unable for her to keep a soft moan from escaping her lips. 

Her heart raced as she felt his lips on her skin, every touch sending a jolt of electricity through her body. She tilted her head back, giving him better access as she revelled in the sensation. The way he held her, the way he kissed her, everything felt right, as if they were finally aligning after being out of sync for so long. 

Y/N's hands roamed over his shoulders and down his chest, feeling the rapid beat of his heart beneath her palm. "Ben," she breathed, her voice a mix of desire and vulnerability. As their passion intensified, Ben's hands trailed down to her ass, leaving a trail of fire along her skin.  

With each caress, she felt herself unravelling, the tension and pain of the past weeks melting away in the heat of their desire. She let out a soft sigh as his fingers found the hem of her shirt, inching it upwards with a tantalizing slowness. 

Her own hands eagerly exploring the expanse of Ben's chest, feeling the warmth of his skin beneath her fingertips. His muscles tensed and relaxed under her touch, a silent invitation for her to continue. With a shaky breath, she began to unbutton his shirt, revealing the strong lines of his torso inch by inch. 

Their kisses grew more fervent, hungry and desperate, as if trying to convey the depth of their longing through touch alone. Ben's hands roamed lower, tracing the curves of Y/N's body with an almost reverent touch. She gasped as his fingers brushed against her clothes core. 

With a silent understanding, they shed their remaining clothing, each piece a barrier to the intimacy they craved. In the dim light of the room, they stood before him, vulnerable yet unashamed.  

Y/N found herself on her knees between Ben's legs. Their gazes locked, filled with a raw desire that spoke volumes without a single word. In this intimate moment, they were lost in each other's eyes, the world around them fading. 

She gently tugged his pants and boxers down, freeing him. pressing her lips against the sensitive skin of his hip. Ben's breath caught in his throat as he felt the warmth of her mouth against his skin, sending a jolt of pleasure straight to his core. 

He watched with a mix of anticipation and longing as she moved closer, her lips trailing a path of fire along his thigh, inching ever closer to her destination. When she finally reached him, she hesitated for a moment, her eyes searching his for reassurance.  

Finding nothing but desire and trust reflected back at her. Ben's sharp intake of breath filled the room as she took him in her hand, her fingers wrapping around his length. She began with soft, slow strokes, feeling him harden even more in her grip.  

The warmth of his skin, the weight of him in her hand, all sent shivers of excitement through her. Leaning forward, she placed a soft kiss on the tip before parting her lips and taking him into her mouth.  

She moved slowly at first, letting her tongue swirl around the head, the taste of him alone made her moan. Ben groaned, his hand coming to rest on her head, his fingers tangling gently in her hair.  

Y/N worked him with a combination of skill and desperation, needing to hear more of his words, to feel his approval. That's it, baby," he murmured, "You're so good at this," he groaned, his voice rough with arousal.  

"So perfect. My perfect girl." His words spurred her on, her pace quickening as she took him deeper. Ben's breaths grew ragged, his hips thrusting gently in time with her movements. "That's it, sugar," he murmured, his voice dripping with praise.  

"Just like that." Encouraged by his response, Y/N took him deeper, hollowing her cheeks as she moved her mouth up and down his shaft. She used one hand to stroke the base, while the other hand rested on his thigh for balance.  

Her movements were steady and deliberate, her eyes flicking up to meet his every so often, drinking in the sight of his pleasure. Y/N adjusted her angle, taking him even deeper into her throat. She could feel every ridge and vein of him against her tongue, and the sensation made her own arousal build.  

She bobbed her head, her rhythm steady and unrelenting, her hand moving in sync with her mouth. The sensation was exquisite, sending a surge of pleasure coursing through Ben's veins. He let out a low groan, his hands tangling in her hair as he surrendered to the overwhelming waves of sensation crashing over him.  

Her touch was gentle yet firm, her lips and tongue working in perfect harmony to drive him to the brink of ecstasy and back. 

She could feel him holding back, trying not to push her head down. But the loved the way he reacted, how she felt his grip in her hair tighten, how his hips sporadically bucked up. And the way he praised her... made her moan.  

“Oh, that’s it, sugar... fuck.” 

As Y/N continued to pleasure him, Ben's breathing grew more erratic, and she could tell he was close. Suddenly, he pulled her away, stopping her just before he could come. She looked up at him, confusion and desire mingling in her eyes. Without a word, Ben lifted her from her knees, pulling her onto his lap so that she straddled him. 

He leaned in, capturing her lips in a deep kiss. His tongue swept into her mouth, claiming her with a possessive hunger that made her moan softly against his lips. As they kissed, his hand moved between her thighs, slipping under the fabric of her panties.  

His fingers found her slick with arousal, and he let out a groan of appreciation. "You're so wet," he murmured against her lips, his voice husky with desire. "All for me." His fingers slid through her folds, teasing her entrance before circling her clit with gentle, deliberate strokes. 

 Y/N gasped, her hips rocking against his hand, seeking more of his touch. Her need for him was overwhelming, every nerve in her body alight with longing. "Ben," she breathed, her voice trembling with need.  

"Please..." He grinned, a predatory glint in his eyes as he watched her writhe above him. "Patience, sugar," he said, his fingers continuing their tormenting dance. "I want to feel you come undone for me."  

Her hands clutched at his shoulders, her nails digging into his skin as she fought to stay upright. Ben's other hand slid up her back, pulling her closer as he kissed her breasts. Ben added another finger, increasing the intensity. He alternated between gentle caresses and firmer, more insistent movements, keeping her on the edge but never quite allowing her to tip over into climax.  

Ben's fingers worked her expertly, curling slightly to find that perfect spot inside her. The sensation was electric, and Y/N felt herself teetering on the edge of an overwhelming orgasm. "Ben, I'm so close," she whimpered, her voice a mix of desperation and desire.  

"Come for me sugar." With a final, confident movement, he pressed his fingers deeper, his thumb circling her clit. The pressure built to an unbearable peak, and with one last thrust and swirl of his fingers, he sent her over the edge. Her body convulsed in his arms, waves of pleasure crashing through her as she cried out his name.  

Throughout her climax, Ben's fingers continued their ministrations, drawing out every last shudder of pleasure until she was left trembling and breathless in his arms. As her trembling subsided, he gently guided her hips, aligning himself with her entrance.  

He looked into her eyes, his gaze filled with a mix of desire and tenderness. "Are you ready?" he asked, his voice soft and intimate. Y/N nodded, her breath still coming in heavy pants. "Yes," she whispered, her eyes locked onto his.  

Slowly, he entered her, filling her completely. She gasped at the sensation, her body adjusting. Ben's hands moved to her hips, guiding her movements as she began to ride him. The slow, sensual rhythm they found together was both intoxicating and deeply satisfying. His eyes darkened with renewed desire, and his grip on her hips tightened.  

He began to guide her movements with more force, his fingers digging into her skin in a way that sent delicious shivers down her spine. "That's my girl," he growled, his voice a rough whisper. "I need you to ride me harder, sugar."  

With his guidance, Y/N started to move with more urgency, her hips rocking back and forth with a rhythm that matched his rising intensity. Ben's hands moved to her waist, his fingers pressing into her flesh as he pulled her down onto him with each thrust, driving himself deeper inside her.  

The sensation was overwhelming, a perfect blend of roughness and tenderness that made her head spin. "Just like that," he praised, his voice thick with pleasure. "You're doing so good, baby. Don't stop." He thrust up into her, meeting her movements with a force that made her gasp.  

Each collision of their bodies sent waves of pleasure radiating through her, the friction and heat building to an almost unbearable intensity. Ben's eyes never left hers, mesmerized by the look of her.  

You're so tight," he groaned, his grip on her waist tightening even further. "I can't get enough of you." His words spurred her on, her movements growing more frantic as she rode him. She could feel another orgasm building, the pressure inside her mounting with each hard, deep thrust.  

Ben's hands roamed over her body, one moving up to cup her breast, his thumb brushing over her nipple in a way that made her cry out. He leaned forward, capturing her lips in a bruising kiss, his tongue demanding and insistent. The kiss was a perfect mirror of their physical connection intense, consuming, and utterly passionate.  

"Come for me again," he commanded, his voice a low, urgent growl. "I want to feel you come around me." Y/N's body obeyed before her mind could catch up, the combination of his rough thrusts and his commanding word. 

They stayed locked together, their bodies trembling with the aftershocks of their shared pleasure. Ben's grip on her softened, his hands moving to gently stroke her back as they caught their breath. He looked up at her. “If I had known that this was the way to make it up to you. I wouldn’t have waited so long.” 

Y/N smiled weakly, her heart full and her body spent. She leaned down to kiss him softly, their connection feeling stronger than ever. “Ben I...” she said still out of breath but his kiss interrupted her. 

Ben looked in her eyes, seeing the hope shimmering. Seeing his future before him. His hand caressed her cheek, eyes tracing her face, ready to tell her the one thing he was scared of, for so long.

And then he finally whispered:  “I love you.”  

--

Let me know what you think, feel free to like, share or comment. Make sure you check out my masterlist.      

Tag list: -> If you want to be added just let me know what you like to read.

@syrma-sensei @suckitands33 @mostlymarvelgirl @globetrotter28 @jackles010378 @hobby27 @call-me-mrs-winchester @yvonneeeee

[highfunctioningflailgirl]

The Damage Control Series - Masterlist

A series of missing scene and coda ficlets of all the times Sam and Dean (and Castiel) got injured in the show, and we never saw them heal or dealing with the aftermath. Contains a lot of hurt/comfort and angst but just as much character exploration.

The entire series on AO3: Damage Control

On Tumblr:

Season One:

Damage Control - 1x01 Pilot

Damage Control - 1x02 Wendigo

Damage Control - 1x05 Bloody Mary

Damage Control - 1x06 Skin

Damage Control - 1x07 Hookman

Damage Control - 1x08 Bugs

Damage Control - 1x10 Asylum

Damage Control - 1x11 Scarecrow

Damage Control - 1x12 Faith

Damage Control - 1x15 The Benders

Damage Control - 1x16 Shadow

Damage Control - 1x18 Something Wicked

Damage Control - 1x22 Devil's Trap

Season Two

Damage Control- 2x01 In My Time Of Dying

Damage Control- 2x02 Everybody Loves A Clown

Damage Control - 2x03 Bloodlust

Damage Control - 2x04 Children Shouldn’t Play With Dead Things

Damage Control - 2x05 Simon Said

Damage Control - 2x09 Croatoan

Damage Control - 2x10 Hunted

Damage Control - 2x14 Born Under A Bad Sign

Damage Control- 2x15 Tall Tales

Damage Control - 2x17 Heart

Damage Control - 2x19 Folsom Prison Blues

Damage Control - 2x20 What Is And What Should Never Be

Damage Control - 2x21 All Hell Breaks Loose - Part 1

Damage Control - 2x22 All Hell Breaks Loose - Part 2 - Chapter 1

Damage Control - 2x22 All Hell Breaks Loose - Part 2 - Chapter 2

Season Three

Damage Control - 3x03 Bad Day At Black Rock

Damage Control - 3x07 Fresh Blood

Damage Control - 3x08 A Very Supernatural Christmas

Damage Control - 3x11 Mystery Spot

tbc…

[jawritter]

Carry On

Chapter 29 (Final)

Summary: It was just a simple hunt, found on a pie festival. It was supposed to be easy. Something they’d all done one hundred and one times a million. No one could have told Y/N, Dean, and Sam that nothing from that point on would ever be the same again.

Pairing: Dean Winchester x Reader x Sam Winchester

Word Count: 3k

Warnings: Throws some fluffing feels in your face and then closes the door like a boss. 

Due to the graphic nature of this fic, and the fact that it will eventually contain Smut. This fic is an 18 + only fic! If you’re under 18 DO NOT read this fic!

A/N: This fic is beta’d by @kazsrm67​​​​ Thanks so much love! Please do not copy my work! Feedback is golden! I hope you all enjoy this ride with me!

My Mastlist        Series Masterlist

“Wearing a hole in the floor isn’t going to make the time go by any faster,” Y/N reminded Dean as she sat on the counter, nibbling on a saltine cracker, and watching her boyfriend literally pace the kitchen in front of her. 

“Sorry,” Dean grumbled as he forced himself to stop pacing, and after a brief moment of deliberation, decided to just take a seat at the kitchen table.

Not fifteen feet away, in the bathroom that adjoined the hallway, were two pregnancy tests sitting snugly under a box on top of the sink. The test took only three minutes to show the results, it had so far been exactly 1 minute and 34 seconds since she placed the boxes over the top of the test once she’d taken them, and honestly, it felt like it had been one year and 34  days instead. 

Especially to Dean. That much she could tell. He wasn’t exactly hiding it very well at the moment.

“Dean, don’t get your hopes up, okay? It could just be a stomach bug, and I don’t want you to get disappointed,” Y/N said as her gaze wandered back to the red reamed clock on the wall; checking the time for what felt like the hundredth time in about 40 seconds. 

It was true. All signs and symptoms pointed to pregnancy. They’d stopped all preventative measures that could deter conception, but that didn’t mean she’d gotten pregnant yet. She was prepared to have to try for quite a while to even get pregnant. She’d taken birth control for years, and only God knows how long it was going to take for her body to hormonally be ready to conceive. 

“Trust me sweetheart, my hopes aren’t up,” Dean assured her, reaching for her to come and sit down in his lap.

Carefully, she pushed down and off of her perch and made her way over to where he was sitting, slipping into his hold with ease. 

“It will happen when and if it’s meant to. This is kinda one of those things we have little control over. We can do things to help it along, and there are multiple avenues to try, but after everything in life we’ve been through, I’ve learned nothing ever comes easy, or right away; so I have no expectations, other than making sure you’re okay,” Dean continued, placing a kiss to the top of her forehead. 

She melted into the warmth that seemed to always radiate from Dean’s body. Home, no matter where they were in life, no matter where life would take them, this was it, Dean was home. Not a roof and four walls. 

“I’m feeling a lot better,” Y/N admitted. “I’m sorry I scared you earlier.”

Dean’s grip tightened around her waist, attempting to hold her as close to him as humanly possible. “It’s okay, it’s my job to take care of you when you’re not feeling well. I just wish you would have told me you weren’t feeling great sooner; I would have never gone into work this morning. I didn’t know this was something that had been kinda going on for days. You’ve got to communicate with me sweetheart.”

“I know, I’m sorry,” Y/N said, burying her face in the crook of his neck. 

Here she sat with the tables turned, what felt like not so long ago, she was the one telling him that HE needed to communicate with HER when he wasn’t feeling well. God they had come so far, especially Dean. 

Just since his accident, he’d proven not only friends, family, but doctors and even himself wrong. He’d far surpassed any expectation any of them set for him. He’d done the one thing Chuck and the universe had tried so fucking hard to not allow him to do -  he’d created a life for himself. He’d created a home. He was doing what it was he always wanted to do. He was happy. An ending he never thought he’d deserve, and one Y/N didn’t really feel that she deserved either, but here they were. He should be dead. By all rights, accounts and reasons, Dean should have never lived to see the outside of that barn, but here he was, alive and well. Scared, battered, broken in some ways, but still here. Still alive. 

“Did you ever think we’d be here?” Y/N questioned, and Dean swallowed thickly above her. 

“No. No I didn’t. I thought I’d be dead by now. I never saw life the way it was not. It was just a distant dream. It still feels like a dream some days,” Dean admitted, and he wasn’t wrong, it did feel like a dream some days. If it weren’t for the hard days, the days that tested the both of them on every emotional and physical level, she’d think they were both dead and in heaven, just playing this thing out, but nope, this was real, this was their life. As fake as it felt, it was real. 

“Me either,” Y/N voiced after a moment. “I had given up on anything even remotely similar to this. Never even tried to achieve it.”

“Do you regret it?” Dean asked, his deep rumble barely above a whisper in the silence that hung heavy in the kitchen. “Do you regret giving up your life as a hunter for this? For me?”

Y/N sat up straight as he would allow her with his firm grip on her waist, and placed a gentle kiss to his lips before leaning her forehead against his own. “Not even for a second. I’d do it all over again, no matter how many times I had to live through everything we both went through, I’d do it with a smile on my face as long as it ended right here, right now.”

“Me too,” Dean agreed. “I’d walk right into that barn every time, go through every ounce of pain and suffering, just as long as we ended up right here in this kitchen at the end.”

The sound of her alarm going off seemed much louder than it was -coming from her phone in the  pocket of her sweat pants;  she’d have jumped off of Dean’s lap had he not been holding onto her. But as the shock of the sudden loud sound waned, the heaviness set in with a rock of nerves in the pit of her stomach. Here it was. The moment of truth. There were only two answers waiting on the other side of that door, but one would change their lives forever. Suddenly, she found herself too scared and nervous to move. 

“Do you want me to go and look for you?” Dean questioned when she didn’t move, just sat up ramrod straight in his lap. 

“No, no I wanna do it, just… stay here, okay?” 

Dean nodded as she stood on shaking legs, and even though she didn’t turn around to see him, she could feel his pale green gaze on every step she made towards the door. 

A million and a half memories flooded her mind as she opened the bathroom door and stepped inside, looking at the boxes that were still set on top of the little tests. Memories of pain, so much pain. Pain of Dean never even noticing her. The undesirable pain she felt as she stood there and watched him stuck to that goddamn poll, his life quickly bleeding away. Pain as she watched him struggle to recover. The fear that he’d never be the same again, if he ever woke up at all. The pain of learning how to let him go, so that he could recover on his own, and move from caretaker to partner. The moment they moved in this house. Every step that they made that led them to this moment. She could still see it. It was all still so clear. A horrible ending that they had taken, and rewritten for the good. What could have been a disaster, now could possibly be the start of a whole new life. One that Dean had always wanted. One that she had always wanted. 

She felt as if she was having an out of body experience as she lifted the box off of the text, eyes closed; breath held, almost too afraid to open her eyes and see that they were negative, which she had convinced herself that they were. 

“It’s okay,” she whispered to herself. “It’s all gonna be okay. No matter what the results are, we’re gonna be okay.”

With every ounce of courage she had left in her body, Y/N forced her eyes open, and her focus to shift down to the counter, where the sticks were. 

At first, she thought she was hallucinating, surely she had to be, because one test stood proud and pink with two lines on the result screen, and the other the word YES + . She was pregnant. 

Subconsciously, her hand fluttered down to her stomach as shock quickly made way for disbelief, and disbelief to something that she could only describe as pure joy. She had a little life, a little piece of Dean Winchester, the man she loved more than her own life, growing right now inside of her. A piece of him that no matter what, she’d get to keep forever. 

Grabbing both tests, she quickly made her way out of the door, and back towards the kitchen, where Dean was still waiting at the table, his head buried in his hands.  

Most people would have probably wanted to ‘surprise’ him with something cute. Some way of telling him that he was gonna be a Dad, but not her. They’d waited long enough for this moment, and she wasn’t going to make him wait a minute longer for the sake of theatrics. 

Dean’s head lifted as he heard her footsteps approaching, and he was on his feet reaching for the test before she could even make it to him. His hand shook as he took the two test from her hand, and looked down at them. The same emotional turmoil running over his face as had hers only a moment ago, which sent a flood of emotions streaming down her face, or maybe it was the hormones?

“You’re pregnant?” he stated after a while-  as if he needed to say it to make it real. 

“You’re going to be a father, Dean Winchester,” she said, her voice choking with emotions, as he wrapped his arms around her squeezing her tightly as his own emotional dam broke, and years of pain, rejection, doubt, and fear of never having a life of his flooded down his own face, all while he clung on to her like she was his lifeline. She was honestly, and he was hers. 

Life as they knew it would never be the same. Things had forever changed. Dean had a family of his own now. A real family. This was the first day of their forever. 

Y/N’s eye’s lifted to the doorway of the kitchen, where had Dean not been holding her up, her feet would have given out from under her as the clear ghost of John Winchester and Mary Winchester stood, arm and arm watching the pair. Jack and Cas stood not far behind in the hallway, along with Bobby, beaming proudly at him. 

“All of Heaven had to come and see this moment,” Jack said as both stood there in shock at the faces of family and friends long gone. 

“We’re all so proud of you son, and when that boy of yours is born, he’s going to do great things,” John said, pride beaming from his face. “You did good.”

Just as suddenly as they had appeared, in a blink of an eye, they were all gone. Leaving nothing but an empty room, and the promise of a son that Dean had always wanted. She couldn’t think of a better, more fitting ending for Dean Winchester. The righteous man that might have saved the world on multiple occasions, and he saved her. He’d saved her in way’s she’d never stop thanking him for. He was her constant. Her comfort, and now, the father of her child, and the man he could finally call himself proud of. Scared. Battered. Bruised. Broken. But proud of the man, father, and one day husband he’d become. 

The End.

Forever:

@bubsonnobx​​​​​​​​

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Jensen and Dean’s Babes

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[so-much-for-the-seashells]

Logan Howlett, the man you are. (Headcanons!!)

Minors, do not interact.

A/N: Y’all. I’ve been in a writing rut, but something about Logan- and Huge Jackedman, by extension- regaining his moment in the spotlight has gotten me back at it. Hugh was 1000% the reason I found out that I have a thing for dilfs, and let me tell you, I ain’t mad about it. To quote one author, who I can’t remember off the top of my head but wrote a KILLER breeding kink fic for Wolvie, “before there was Jensen Ackles, there was Hugh Jackman.” If you know me or my work, you know I’m a Jackles girl, but Hugh? Hugh will always get me going, whether he’s a ringleader, a robot shadow boxer, or otherwise.

TLDR I’m so in love with Hugh/Logan again. I always am, but I’m really on fire rn. Don’t worry, I will be continuing the 2SC series, but I needed this.

As always, all interaction, especially your words, is so very much appreciated!! I hope you like this one! Also, thank you for 120 followers! This account is maybe three months old, this is an insane milestone.

CW: it’s really just soft with a side of spice, the most flavorful being daddy/breeding.

-first of all, this man is a the biter.

-and it’s not always in a sexual sense

-he’ll just walk up to you and gently graze his teeth against your exposed shoulder or neck

-especially at night, after sex or not. He’ll be holding you close- you’re the little spoon ofc🎀- and just nibble on the juncture of your neck and shoulder while you cuddle into him

-honestly, it doesn’t hurt. And he only leaves marks if he wants to, ie when he’s balls deep inside of your little cunt OR wanting to remind the world who you belong to

-he’s just got a bit of an oral fixation is all

-speaking of which, he could be between your thighs for the rest of eternity and he’d be fine with it. He LOVES when you tug on his hair as he makes you squirm, only needing one strong hand to hold you down

-he goes feral when he sees you wearing his shirts

-loves to throw you over his shoulder and to play fight

-he’s interested in anything you’re interested in

-mans can’t cook to save his life but adores watching you and “helping”

-aka being all up in your business when you’re literally just trying to chop an onion

-he can be clingy. Not in a whiny way, in a playfully annoying way.

-will always find a way to make you late to anything. Sometimes it’s for the sake of a quickie, other times it’s because he wants one more kiss or to see the last five minutes of whatever show you guys watch together

-if you’re into daddy, he’s into daddy. Especially if you’re significantly younger than him

-he likes to squish you- your boobs, tummy, ass, wherever. He loves your body for what it is and loves you

-this man is so in love with you, by the way

-he’s old as hell but if you teach him how to text he’ll text you sporadically throughout the day. Sometimes it’s really blurry, almost impossible to decipher, pictures of things that remind him of you, other times it’s “When will you be home?” even though he’s already called you to ask four times. That’s mainly on his days off though- if he’s not doing something or you then he doesn’t know what to do with himself.

-that’s not to say he’s not always thinking of you. On missions, wherever, you’re the first thing in his mind. Give him a locket with a picture of the two of you and chances are he’ll wear it forever

-oh back to the other one he totally texts like an old man. If you try to use slang, or even just use “u,” you’ll confuse him so bad that he’ll think he’s in the future or that you’re speaking a different language. He also doesn’t like emojis, unfortunately 😞

-he’s got a sweet tooth. Loves to bake with you- he can’t cook but he can make a mean batch of snickerdoodles. No one knows why, and he’ll never offer any explanation.

-speaking of sweets that’s why he loves eating you out so much, because you taste so sweet to him

-and all of his nicknames are sweet based- sweetheart, sweets, sugar, etc- with the exception of darling which coming from him would put anyone on their knees immediately

-speaking of being on your knees he loves when you do it. Not as much as he loves eating you out, but he does enjoy a solid blow once in a while

-he’s a sucker for cockwarming, even if it’s barely sexual. Just as a way to be close. If you don’t mind him smoking he’ll smoke a cigar while you do so, and get into a nice soft headspace

-the kink of his that annoys him the most is breeding. He doesn’t want kids (unless you do, which is its own conversation. Personally I don’t so works for me haha) but when he’s balls deep, pushing you into the mating press, it doesn’t matter. Especially if you’re in a place where he can fuck you raw all the time- ie you take the pill, have had a hysterectomy, etc- then he will, and he will always spill his seed deep in you, mind filling with pictures of you all round and swollen and cute even if it’s impossible

-however it is hot when he gets in that headspace regardless of if kids are in the question or not

-hang on I thought of something else and then I forgot it

-uhh

-oh that’s it. Praise. Loves getting it, loves receiving it. If you’re more receptive to degradation he’ll give you that, but he loves telling you what a good girl you are

-also has a blast with brat taming

-anyways back to the soft stuff

-he loves domestic life. Curling up with you on the couch with fluffy blankets and snacks, watching rom coms and other cheesy movies

-he’ll rest his head in your lap if you’re drawing, crocheting, reading, etc

-he loves being petted. Your hands in his hair, tracing his muscles, whatever. It makes him so happy and it’s soothing for him

-and we all know how he’s mr gruff n tuff, right?? Well if he’s really eepy and lying on his lap while you stroke his hair, there’s an ever slight chance you can get him to purr. Don’t tease him about it, though, or he’ll get super self conscious

-if you like to workout he’ll work out with you

-he really likes to box to blow off steam, but if it’s with you and you’re not a fellow mutant it’s more play fighting than anything, but it’s still fun

-he’s a sucker for cheesy dates

-call him ‘Lo’ or ‘Wolvie,’ or any nickname that fits him. He thinks it’s adorable, and owns it. He also gives you like fifty nicknames of his own.

-he loves long walks on the beach if it’s accesible, hiking’s also fun to him

-he’ll never take his anger out on you, ever

-he loves reading with you, just sitting in comfortable silence with your respective books

-that’s all for now!!

If you have any ideas for ficlets or headcanons, my asks box is always open!! Xx

[winchesterwild78]

The Tutor part 2

Master List

Characters: Jensen Ackles x Reader

Warnings: Angst, Physical Assault-Jeff is back, Fluff, SMUT!

**Trigger Warning: Some of this features Domestic Violence. It’s grabbing an arm, face and slapping.**

A/N: Just a quick idea that popped in my head. A short series, maybe 2 or 3 chapters. I don’t know yet. No disrespect to Jensen or his family. This is a work of fiction. Jensen has children in this, but I do not use their real names. 

Reader is a teacher and is asked to tutor Jensen’s child. Things develop between Jensen and the reader. I do not condone cheating, again, this is a work of fiction.

This chapter got a little long. Sorry not sorry. 😀 Please overlook any errors. I wrote this fast and edited it fast. 

Minors DNI 18+

Weeks had passed since the shared kiss between you and Jensen. He was true to his word and nothing was awkward and he didn’t pursue another kiss. The two of you would share quick glances and an occasional ‘accidental touch’.

Mrs. Ackles had come home and you finally met her. She was kind but you noticed the tension between her and Jensen. It broke your heart. She was home for a few days before she left again. The kids were upset and Jensen seemed angry. 

The holidays were approaching and you weren’t sure what your tutoring schedule would look like so you needed to talk to Jensen. After the kids were done for the afternoon and playing outside, you went to find Jensen. 

You heard him in his office, and as you approached the door you realized he was on the phone. As you started to walk away you heard his voice filled with anger and hurt. You froze. “No! I want you to be home before the holidays, if not for me how about for our children? You’ve barely been home in months. It’s like you’re trying to stay away.” There was silence. As you started to walk away you heard him huff in frustration, “Fine, you do what you need to do. I’ll figure it out. I’ll see if my mom can come watch them so I can go do my job. You know the one that pays for this lifestyle you’ve become accustomed to.” 

You walked back into the living room and started to pack up your things to go home. Jensen came down the stairs. He was wearing a t-shirt that hugged his chest, and gray sweatpants. You bit your lips and your thighs clenched together. His hair looked like he had run his fingers through it in frustration. 

When Jensen saw you his features softened. “Leaving so soon, Y/N?” “Yeah, we are done and I figured you needed some space. I’m sorry. I overheard some of your conversation. I came to talk to you and heard it.” You put your head down, feeling a bit shameful for listening to his private conversation.

He walked up to you and placed his fingers under your chin, gently lifting up your head. “Hey, it’s okay. I could have closed the door. I’m sorry you had to hear that. So what did you want to talk to me about?” “Oh, um I was wondering what you wanted my schedule to look like with the holidays coming up.” 

“Oh, well I guess that’s up to you. If you want to take a holiday break because you’re out of school too, I’m fine with that. I’m flexible.” You nodded and thought for a second. “Do you know when Mrs. Ackles is coming home? I overheard you say something about needing help with the kids, when would that be?

“Yeah, I’m not sure when or if she’s coming home. I have to leave Saturday for a few days to go shoot some episodes for a show I’m working on. I’ll see if my mom is available, so if you’re going to tutor you’ll get to meet her.”

You stepped a little closer to him, “Jensen, I can watch the kids for you if you want me to. I really don’t mind. I start my Winter Break on Friday, so I'll be available.” “Oh I can’t ask you to do that.” You touched his arm, “Jensen, you’re not. I’m offering, and I really don’t mind. I love your kids.” 

He touched your arm, “That is incredibly generous of you. If you’re sure then I insist on paying you for it and you stay in the guest room while you’re here.” You stepped even closer to him. Feeling like a magnet was pulling you to him. “Jensen, you’re not paying me any extra.” He stepped closer, “You have to let me pay you for your time.” 

Mere inches from each other now, you looked into his eyes, “No. You’re not paying me. I’m doing this because I want to. So you have a guest house and a guest room?” You asked. “Yes, the guest house is where we have people stay if they are going to be here for a while, the guest room is for shorter stays.” 

Jensen’s hand brushed your hair behind your ear. “Thank you, Y/N. I really appreciate it.” Your breath hitched at his touch, “You’re welcome Jensen. I promise they will be okay.” He took your hand and pulled you into a hug. Your face buried in his chest, taking in his cologne. Your heart racing and the urge to kiss him became overwhelming. 

You looked up at him and his green eyes met your y/e/c eyes. His thumb brushed your cheek and he leaned down. Stopping before touching your lips. You closed your eyes, anticipating the kiss, but it didn’t come. You looked at him and his eyes were a mixture of desire and sadness. “I’m sorry, Y/N. I don’t know what came over me.” He cleared his throat and released you from his arms. 

Your heart ached for his touch and his kiss. “Um, let me show you the guest room.” He walked away and you followed him down the hallway. The guest room was on the first floor and down the hallway opposite the living room. 

He opened a door revealing a spacious room with its own private bathroom. “This is where you’ll be staying while you’re here with the kids. Please make yourself at home, extra towels are in the closet in the bathroom.” “Jensen, it’s perfect, thank you. Is it okay if I come on Thursday? That way the kids can get used to me being here and you can be more comfortable with leaving them here with me.” 

“I’m completely comfortable with you being here with them. I trust you with them, but yes. Feel free to come on Thursday.” You nodded and thanked him again. 

*Thursday*

You: Hey, I’m leaving work now. I’ll be there in about 30 minutes. I already have my stuff. 

Jensen: Great! I’m grilling tonight. Hope you’re hungry.

You: Starved. Can I bring anything?

Jensen: Nope, just yourself.

You: Okay, see y’all soon. 

As you walked out to your car you saw Jeff leaning against it. He pushed off the car when he saw you. “Hey baby. I’ve missed you.” He tried to hug you but you pulled away. “Aww come on, don’t be like that. I think you’ve had plenty of time to settle down from your tantrum. You need to come home.” “I’m not coming back, Jeff. I don’t want you anymore and I am filing for divorce.” Jeff grabbed your arm hard, “The fuck you are! You can’t leave me. You’re nothing without me. Get in the fucking car, we are going home, NOW!” You pulled away from him and you cried out in pain. His grip was so tight on your arm. “Let me go! I’m not going anywhere with you.” He grabbed you again and pinned you against the car. His hand gripped your chin. The pain shot through your face. Your mind thought about Jensen and how gentle his touch was. 

Tears streamed down your face. You brought your knee up and hit him in his groin. He dropped his grip and groaned in pain. “You stupid bitch!” He smacked you across your face, and it felt like your eye was going to pop out of your head. Blood fell from your mouth.

A male co-worker was coming out of the building when he saw Jeff hit you and ran over to help you. Jeff took off and your co-worker called the police. They came and took both of your statements and asked if you wanted to press chargers. You told them yes, so they were going to arrest Jeff. Once he was arrested they were going to issue a protective order too. 

Over an hour had passed before you were free to leave. You looked at your phone and saw texts from Jensen.

Jensen: Hey, Y/N. It’s been a while. Hope you’re okay.

Jensen: Not trying to overstep, but I haven’t heard from you or seen you. I’m starting to get a little worried.

Jensen: Okay, it’s been over an hour. I’m really worried. Please let me know you’re okay.

Your heart fluttered and you felt guilty he was worrying about you.

You: Hey, I’m okay. I’m on my way. I’ll explain everything when I get there.

Jensen: Oh thank god you’re okay. I’ll be waiting. 

You drove to Jensen’s house and when you pulled in the driveway you looked up and saw him standing at the door. Getting out of the car the first thing he noticed was the mark on your face. He practically leaped off the steps and came up to you. He cupped your face, “Oh my god, what happened? Are you okay?” You sobbed, the dam finally breaking. He pulled you into his arms as you stood there sobbing into his chest. His hand rubbing your back while he consoled you. 

“Come on, let’s get you inside.” You followed him inside and sat at the kitchen bar. Jensen grabbed the bottle of whiskey and two glasses. “Looks like you could use this.” You nodded gratefully as you took the glass of whiskey to your lips. “I’m here for you, Y/N. Whenever you’re ready to talk.” You nodded and the tears started to flow again. 

The kids came running into the room excited to see you. You turned so they couldn’t see you crying, and Jensen ushered them outside. “Guys, go outside and play until dinner is ready. Ms. Y/N and daddy have to have a grown up conversation.” “Okay daddy.” They ran outside. 

You looked up at Jensen, “Thank you. I didn’t want them to see me crying.” Jensen took your hand in his and rubbed it. “I understand. I just want to make sure you’re okay.” You began to tell Jensen about what happened, and you saw his jaw tense with anger. “I’m scared. I didn’t think he was capable of that. I have to figure out what to do now. He knows where Y/F/N lives, and I don’t want to put her in danger.”

Jensen’s eyes softened and he walked around the counter taking your hand, “Move into my guest house. The offer is still on the table, and we have great security. He doesn’t know where I live. You would be safe.” You bit your lip, “I’ll think about it. I’ll let you know by the time you return from your trip.” “Okay, come here, let me look at that mark.” You stood up and Jensen turned your face to see the mark Jeff left. His eyes flashed with anger, sadness and something else. 

“God, what kind of man hits a woman?” His hand brushed lightly over your face, “You deserve so much better than that, sweetheart.” You touched his hand that was still cupping your face and placed a soft kiss on his palm. 

Your eyes met and the distance between you got smaller. Jensen’s lips inches from yours again. Your breath mixes with his. The smell of whiskey and mint hit your nostrils. “Tell me to stop, baby.” “I don’t want you to Jensen. Please, don’t stop.” His lips met yours in a soft passionate kiss. 

You moaned into his mouth as his hands ran up your body. Your mind was racing. You knew this was wrong, but it felt so good. His lips and his hands felt so incredible on your body. Jensen softly leaned you against the door so he could lock it. Then he spun you around and led you back towards the bed. 

Your calves hit the bed and you fell backwards. You giggled as he fell beside you. “You’re so beautiful. I can’t believe he’d hit you.” You blushed and kissed his lips. 

His hand started to move against your body. You tensed a little. “Sweetheart, we can stop if you want to.” “No, I don’t want to. I just want you to be sure.” 

Jensen kissed your lips and leaned back a little bit “I’m 100% sure I want this. I want you.” He pulled his shirt over his head revealing his perfectly toned chest. You licked and bit your lip. Your fingers traced down his chest. Touching each freckle and roaming over the contours of his torso. 

You felt your arousal pool between your legs and soak your panties. His arousal was pushing against your thigh. 

His hands cupped your breasts as his fingers moved to the hem of your shirt. You nodded and leaned up. He pulled your shirt over your head, revealing your bra covered breasts. 

Jensen let out a primal growl as he took in the sight of your body. You tried to cover yourself. “No, baby. Please don’t. You’re gorgeous.” 

You leaned forward so he could unhook your bra. As your breasts sprang free his mouth was on them. Sucking and playing with each nipple. You leaned your head back and moaned in pleasure. “Yes, Jensen. Feels so good.” 

He smirked as he felt you responding to his touch. Jensen started kissing his way down your body. Taking his time, kissing each curve, mark and committing them to memory. 

As he got to the hem of your pants his eyes looked up at you. You nodded. His fingers brushed against your zipper and button, undoing both of them. You lifted your hips helping him remove your pants and panties. 

Jensen stood and threw your clothes to the side. He looked at your naked body laying on the bed before him. You were never comfortable with your body and now more than ever you hated every curve, stretch mark, and imperfections. You grabbed the blanket trying to cover yourself. 

“Please don’t. I want to see your beautiful body. You’re perfect to me.” You let the blanket fall and tears fell from your eyes. “Oh baby, don’t cry.” “I’m not sad, Jensen. Nobody has ever said that to me. Not even Jeff.” 

“Well we already knew he was a fool. This just confirms it.” He kissed you. His hand slipped between your thighs and found your folds. You gasped at the contact. “Mmm so wet for me.” You moved your hips trying to get more contact. 

His thumb brushed against your throbbing clit as he slid two thick fingers inside your folds. “Oh Jensen” your breath hitched. He began to move his fingers faster, hooking up and hitting your sweet spot. You moved your hips in tandem with his hand. His thumb rubbing your clit as he finger fucked you. 

You were close to your release, “Oh Jensen. I’m gonna cum. Oh fuck!”

Just as you were about to cum his phone rang. “Fuck! Don’t move” He growled as he stood up. You grabbed the blanket and covered yourself. 

He walked out of the room and closed the door behind him. You laid on the bed thinking about what you two were about to do. His lips and touch were amazing. You wanted more. 

You heard Jensen’s voice and could tell he was upset. Figuring the mood was gone, you grabbed your clothes and started to put them back on. A sadness filled your chest, realizing it was his wife on the phone. You wanted him and he wanted you, but he was still married and living with her. Could you really be “the other woman”? 

After getting dressed you walked back into the living room. Jensen was leaning against the kitchen counter, still on the phone. “No, I’m still going to work. Y/N is on her holiday break and offered to watch the kids for us. She’s staying in the guest room. Are you going to be home to spend the holidays with your family? Well I hope for the sake of the kids you will be. Fine. Yeah. I guess I’ll see you next week. Bye.” 

Jensen met your eyes and sighed. “I’m sorry sweetheart. I had to answer it.” You walked over to him, “it’s okay. I understand. She’s your wife and she needed to talk to you. Um, I’m going to grab my stuff. I’ll be back in a few minutes.” 

You walked out to your car and grabbed your bags. Your heart was heavy. You craved his lips and his touch, but you couldn’t break up his marriage. His children were too important to you. Tears pricked your eyes. You knew you had to keep him at arms length for the sake of his children. 

Walking back into the house you saw Jensen in the kitchen getting things ready for the grill. He looked up at you and saw the pain in your eyes. His heart clenching in his chest. 

You walked to the guest room and started unpacking. You could still smell Jensen’s cologne and his shirt was on the floor. The tears you held back were falling. 

A knock on your door had you quickly wiping them away. You cleared your throat “come in” you said softly. “Hey baby, I just needed my shirt.” Your back was to him. You sniffled. Jensen was at your side, “hey, what’s wrong?” You shook your head, “Nothing. I’m okay. I promise.” He cupped your face, his thumb brushing a single tear away,”Please talk to me.” 

“I don’t know if I can do this. I want to be with you. I want to continue what we were doing earlier, but I can’t be the reason your marriage ends. I love your kids too much to hurt them like that.” 

Jensen saw the pain in your eyes “Y/N, please believe me when I tell you that you’re not nor would you ever be the reason my marriage ends. We’ve been drifting apart for years. I lied to you earlier. She’s not on a girls trip. She’s on a trip with her boyfriend. We are only married for the sake of my career. Since I have the “family man” image. I don’t love her anymore and she doesn’t love me. So believe me when I say I want to be with you.” 

“Oh, Jensen. I’m so sorry you’re going through that. I wish there was something I could do to help.” “There is, stay here with us. Be here with the kids and me. They love you so much and it’s been amazing seeing you with them.” “I’ll think about it. I promise.” 

He placed a soft kiss on your lips, “that’s all I can ask for.” 

Friday evening came faster than you’d expected. After the kids were settled in bed you started to clean up the kitchen and the rest of the house. Jensen was in his office working on some things before he left in the morning. You were going to miss him so much. 

After you got everything cleaned you went to your room to change into your comfy sleep clothes. You were wearing an oversized shirt, and shorts. No bra but you had your panties on. 

You walked into the living room and scrolled on your phone. You came across an article about Jensen and his newest project. Your heart swelled with pride. 

Then there was another article that caught your eye. It was about his wife and how she’d been photographed recently with their good friend. You assumed this was her boyfriend by how cozy they looked. Your heart ached for Jensen. 

Putting your phone down you walked to his office to see how much longer he was going to be. You wanted to go over everything with him so tomorrow morning y’all could focus on the goodbyes. 

You knocked on his office door and he said come in. Walking in you saw him sitting at his desk, hair a mess, gray sweatpants hugging his hips, and his t-shirt spread across his chest. Perfectly outlining his toned body. You bit your lip. 

“Hey sweetheart, you okay?” “Yeah. Just wanted to go over everything with you, but I can come back.”

Jensen turned so his body was facing you. His legs spread open. “Come here darlin’” he said as he motioned for you. He put his hands on your hips and pulled you between his legs. You leaned down and kissed his lips. 

Jensen’s hands trailed up your body, leaving goosebumps in their wake. You moaned into his mouth. You could taste the whiskey he was drinking. 

He pulled you on his lap and began kissing you again. You could feel his arousal through his pants. Your thin shorts leaving nothing much between you two. 

You grinded down on his erection, pulling a moan from his lips. “Damn sweetheart. That feels good.” You slide out of his lap and drop to you knees. You look up at Jensen and smile. 

Licking your lips you touch the waistband of his pants and begin to pull at them. You stop, look at him and he nods. Giving you permission to continue. 

Slick pools between your legs and your breath quickens. You pull Jensen’s length out of his pants and boxers. You bite your lip at the sight. His cock is long and thick. The biggest you’d seen. 

You saw some precum on the head, so you lick it off. Your mouth closes around the head and you lightly suck. Jensen groans. You take his length in your mouth and begin to suck him. From base to tip, all the way down your throat. Your tongue running up his length. Jensen’s eyes rolled back in his head, his head dipped back, and his hands grabbed your hair. “Oh fuck baby. That feels so good.” 

Your mouth bobbed up and down his shaft. Taking every inch down your throat. The sounds of you sucking and his moans filled the small space of his office. You were taking him in so far your eyes began to water. 

“Damn baby, you’ve got to stop. I don’t want to cum like this. Fuck I need you.” You leaned back slowly pulling your mouth off his cock. When you pulled your head back there was a small string of saliva that went from the tip to your lips. 

“Damn you’re so beautiful, come here darlin’.” Jensen pulled you off your knees and pulled you back towards him. He sat you on the edge of his desk and ran his hands up your thighs. Your nipples were hard and poking out your shirt. Jensen leaned down and bit through your shirt. Your head fell backwards with a moan.

Jensen’s hands kept sliding up your thigh until they got to the hem of your shorts. His large hand pressed against your pussy through your shorts. Jensen could feel how wet you were. His fingers slid between your shorts and panties, “You’re so wet baby. I can’t wait to taste you.”

Jensen slid your shorts and panties down, exposing your dripping cunt to the cool air. A shiver went through your body. Jensen dropped down to his knees and put your legs over his shoulders. He licked a strip up between your folds, taking his fingers and parting your lips. Your hands grabbed his hair as his tongue danced around your clit. 

“Yes, Jens, keep doing that. Oh god that feels so good.” Jensen’s fingers entered your pussy and hooked up. His tongue flicking and mouth sucking on your clit. “Oh god, I’m so close Jensen.” Jensen lifted his head, you noticed his beard glistened with your juices, “Cum for me sweetheart. Let me taste your release.” You pushed his head back down and he licked and ate you like a starved man. A few more licks and you were tumbling over the edge. 

“Oh, fuck! Jensen, I’m cumming.” Jensen kept licking, pushing you over the edge again. By the time you finished cumming for the second or third time, you honestly lost count, your legs were like jello. 

Jensen stood, lowering your legs gently. His lips crashed on yours. You could taste your release on his lips. “Come on darlin’, I need you. Let’s go to the bedroom.” Jensen helped you stand and took your hand. He guided you to his bedroom. “Jensen, are you sure?” As he pulled you into the room he locked the door, “Yes, I’m sure.” 

He led you over to the bed, pulling off your shirt and exposing your breasts and your naked body to the chilly air. He removed his pants and was standing in front of you completely naked. 

You bit your lower lip taking him in. You laid in the center of the bed as Jensen climbed between your legs. “Are you ready sweetheart?” “Yes, Jensen. I need you, please.” Jensen leaned over, grabbing a condom, putting it on. He lined himself up and slowly pushed inside you.

You both gasped at the feeling. Once he bottomed out he stopped. His head dipped into the crook of your neck. “Damn baby, you feel so good I could cum right now. I need a minute.” You were thankful he took a minute. He was much bigger than anyone you’d been with, so the feeling was a mixture of pleasure and pain. 

Jensen hooked his arms around your legs and lifted them up a little. You moved your hips a little and he started to move. Setting a slow, steady pace, Jensen moved in and out of you. Taking his time, savoring every thrust and moan he pulled from your lips. 

The sound of your pleasure and his rising in the air. Jensen felt himself getting closer so he sped up a little. His thrusts become more urgent, his hands gripping your hips and yours gripping his shoulders. 

“Oh Jensen! Keep going baby. I’m close again.” Your grip on his shoulders got tighter and your nails dug into his skin. “Yes baby! Oh fuck, I’m gonna cum, Y/N.” “Me too, Jensen.” Your release hit without warning, your walls squeezing him and pulling his release. With one final thrust he was spilling his seed into the condom. 

You felt his cock stop twitching and he pulled out. He placed a soft kiss on your forehead as he got up to clean himself up. You pulled the sheet up and around you, laying in his bed you watched him go into the bathroom. Your heart fluttered and warmed. 

When he came back to bed he pulled you into his arms. Placing a soft kiss on your lips he whispered, “That was incredible. Thank you.” You smiled, “Yes it was Jensen. Better than I imagined.” “Oh, so you imagined having sex with me?” You blushed, “maybe.” “Don’t worry, I’ve imagined having sex with you since I met you.” 

“Jensen! You have not.” You hid your face laughing. “Yes I have. You looked incredible the first time I saw you. After you left that night I touched myself thinking about you. This was so much better.” You bit your lip and smiled. 

He pulled you closer to him and brushed the hair out of your face, “You are so beautiful. I’m going to miss you so much while I’m gone.” “I’m going to miss you too, Jensen. So much.” “I’ll video chat at night and we can have phone sex.” He winked at you. “That sounds like fun.” You chuckled. “Come on sweetheart, let’s get some sleep. We have to be up early.”

You nodded and the two of you kissed each other. Placing your head on his chest, you heard the steady beat of his heart. As you drifted off to sleep in his arms, you felt an undeniable feeling growing in your heart. You were equally excited and terrified. 

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[petew21-blog]

Angel in disguise

Misha P.O.V.

The series was coming to an end and we still couldn't believe that all of this won't happen again. Not Jensen, not Jared. I actually wanted the series to go out with a BAM. And it basically did, but me and Jensen spoke about making Dean and Castiel a couple to make the fans happy. Unfortunately in hasn't been approved. Actually they even cut some of our scenes we had together, That made me and Jensen a bit sad, but we promised each other to meet up regularly.

You might ask why, because we didn't make the same deal with Jared. Me and Jensen became some sort of a couple on set. We both had our lives at home, but when we were here, we were like... Dean and Castiel. Yeah you could say that. When we were alone together we actually called each other by our role names, which made it even hotter.

We met up in some old motel by the road. Jared got us a champagne, some candles and set up a very romantic music. We embraced each other, Jensen tore off my clothes. I didn't have to. He was already naked and ready for action. A very hot night followed just as usual. But this time felt different

I was awoken by some noise outside. I opened my eyes grogily and grabbed my shirt from the ground to put it on. I went into the bathroom to take a leak. No, not even at this moment nothing seemed weird to me. But washing hands, Jensen's hands woke me up. I was schocked and screamed a bit.

"Holy shit. I am you!" I pulled up my shirt to observe Jensen's beautiful abs I lovingly kissed just last night.

Then I heard the bed move. I turned around to see my confused face looking at me.

"Who are you?"

"Who would you think, love. Maybe look in the mirror and you'll understand."

Jensen reacted pretty similarly as I did but then we both calmed down.

"We have to find out what is happening and how to handle this situation." I said worryingly

"Hey... How about we let that go for now? We got just a few days alone for the two of us. It might not be the best way to spend our time, just worrying all the time, Misha."

"Maybe you haven't noticed, but we swapped bodies and we have no idea how to reverse this."

"Would it be that bad if we didn't? I mean. I still like you and we are still both attracted to each other. So why not use this for our benefit and just fuck our original bodies? Who can say they have ever done that, huh?"

I had to give it to him. He had an excelent point.

"Ok, maybe some free time won't hurt. Now come here, my CASTIEL"

Another inbox story: Could you maybe do a swap between Misha Collins and Jensen Ackles?

[thesilmarillionblog]

𓏲 𓂃 L o s i n g Y o u

Part: 6

Click here to read the first part.

Summary: Everything was good as a member of Payback and Soldier Boy's secret girlfriend until the team and your relationship with him began to fall apart due to a new member and her developing relationship with Ben right in front of your eyes.

Pairing: Soldier Boy / Reader

Warnings: heavy angst, hurt, language, PTSD, violence, mention of drugs, mention of torture, mentally unstable Soldier Boy, anger issues

Word Count: 3127

A/N: English is not my first language.

* This story is inspired by the song "Losing You" by Dream Evil.

For the previous three days, Soldier Boy, Butcher, and Hughie had been searching for you and researching research from several decades ago. Ben wasn't doing well since he was becoming more and more impatient every day and was preoccupied with what he had done to you. The most difficult part was that you might still be tortured while he is free, in spite of his failings. He was struggling not to punch the two idiots who said they could help him find you, but the fact was that he felt guilty for not finding you quicker.

Soldier Boy was constantly smoking weed, and Hughie was staring at the screen of the device he had in his lap, which he called his "laptop." Soldier Boy was taken aback to discover that the device's internet genuinely knew everything. He studied everything fascinating about the modern world during the night so that when he found you, he could teach you such things.

“According to an official statement, Y/N betrayed the company by selling specific highly confidential information to Russia. This had to have happened after you were captured and taken to Russia. Am I correct?” Hughie questioned, showing Soldier Boy the date.

Ben became outraged and said with rage, “Yes,” taking a tenth sniff at the drugs that were on the table. “She didn't rebel against the government; screw that. Selling information to Russia? She wouldn't even offer her flowers for sale.” He truly wanted to prevent himself from punching Hughie or the internet. “Fucking snakes.”

Hughie and Butcher exchanged a look as Soldier Boy went on to swear and praise your innocence. Hughie got a bit anxious when he heard his heater's alarm go off.

With a swift “Okay, okay,” Hughie calmed Soldier Boy. “You can't always rely on the Internet. Everyone knows that already.”

With a suspicious voice, Butcher asked Soldier Boy, glancing at the TV from Hughie's other side, “Why did she leave them though? There has to have been something that happened.”

Soldier Boy was making a lot of effort to move past these painful recollections in order to start over, but those guys were a little too inquisitive and were doing everything in their power to make him feel uncomfortable. He lied, not knowing what to say, saying, “I don't know.” He could feel the heat rising in his chest every second as a result of their pointless questions.

Soldier Boy inhaled deeply and paused for a moment, ruminating on the day he fired you from the team in a very jackass way. If he had seen the previous version himself, he would have suffered a major head injury. You wouldn't have had to go through such things if only he had listened to you once. He caused you to be hurt in every manner possible.

“She didn't do anything wrong, yet I dismissed her from the squad. Noir is the reason everything happened. What a fucking  traitor!” In an attempt to hide his errors by placing the blame elsewhere, Soldier Boy said it aggressively.

Butcher's eyebrows rose up, and he turned to face Hughie, who had been trying to figure out what Soldier Boy was saying.

“What action did Black Noir take? I take it that he didn't fuck her or something during the time you developed feelings for her.” Butcher questioned him in a humorous way.

Ben growled, “Watch your fucking language, or I'm going to make you gargle my hairy balls in that garrulous mouth of yours,” while Butcher gave him a frightened little look to Hughie, who was about to pee in his trousers since the alarm of the heater was freaking him out with his every word. They wouldn't do well if Butcher continued to annoy Soldier Boy in that way.

“You don't need to know the fucking details; just find her,” Soldier Boy continued, cutting Butcher off before he could say anything else.

This states that she would be imprisoned in America for the rest of her life due to her betrayal and that her body would be studied in the future. It appears they covered up your situation but not hers. Hughie continued to scam every headline about you, saying, “There is no more recent news.”

When Hughie said your body would be examined by the best scientists and doctors, Soldier Boy cursed again. Despite being the strongest superhuman in the world, they had tried to kill him by torturing him severely for years. Even to him, they were all downright painful and disgusting. He didn't want to think about how much pain you endured for decades because of his mistakes. When he saved you from the lab, he would make sure everyone who had harmed you died there, and you could start over.

“Actually, we have a very good friend from Vought. She is also conducting extensive searches by herself. It won't be long until we locate your teammate for you.” Hughie said as he picked up his phone as soon as it began to ring.

Despite the fact that it has been a week and the explosion he created is still being shown on TV every night, Soldier Boy cautiously listened to every phone call in the hopes of learning something about you. However, there was still no single sign. He was sure they were plotting new plans to capture him once again. All of them were fucking cowards.

Butcher offered Soldier Boy a glass of whiskey while Hughie was on the phone with Annie in the kitchen.

“Is he fucking a supe woman?” Soldier Boy asked in disbelief. That guy, Hughie, was full of surprises, though his face was screaming that he was a bottom.

“Never judge the book by its cover,” Butcher smirked.

“So the whole thing was a lie, huh?” As if Ben hadn't repeated the same thing a hundred times, Butcher inquired again. “She must have done something really bad to find herself in a situation like yours.”

Butcher was interested in hearing the story because he wanted to know what was ahead. Dealing with Soldier Boy was dangerous enough, but it would become even more problematic if you shared his anger management issues. For a week, Butcher watched your films and interviews, but he was aware that the media was the least reliable source on earth, particularly when it came to superheroes.

With a menacing glance at Butcher, Soldier Boy merely stated, “She didn't do anything wrong. All she wanted to do was get herself free from the team. It seems that they decided not to respect her decision to leave.”

“What do you think she’ll do when she’s free?” Butcher asked with curiosity and added, “Will she team up with you again despite all?”

For days and hours, Soldier Boy had considered saving you, but he dismissed your feelings upon seeing him again. Thinking about it was not something he wished to do. Even though he was well-known for his confidence, he had been secretly experiencing some insecurity lately, even if he didn't want to acknowledge it. It wasn't that he didn't look nicer; in fact, he was in better form than before, but he was anxious that your opinion might change about him. He was aware that your rescue was more essential than those things, though. Later on, he would be considering the relationship between you.

“I don’t know, but of course she’ll team up with me,” he said trying to sound confident and sure of himself.

Soldier Boy instantly got up from the couch when Butcher's lips parted to ask another question. He focused on the woman Hughie was speaking to on the phone. She was talking about a supe expert physician who had been assigned to study the bodies of the captive supe for scientific purposes for decades, someplace in America.

With great excitement, Hughie hung up the phone and turned to face Butcher and Soldier Boy. He said, “Annie found something. Searches conducted by the government on supe bodies appear to have begun decades ago with Soldier Boy and Y/N. They recruited the world's brightest physicians and scientists to work strictly with Vought.”

Soldier Boy impatiently urged him, saying, “Go on” and tell all the shit already.

“All right. There is a single scientist in charge who watches over all supe captives for his scientific studies. He is required to report to Vought twice in a span of three months, in great detail. It has continued for many years. He is retired last year, but he most likely has knowledge of the location of Y/N.”

Soldier Boy thought, Fuck. At last, he located you. As Hughie spoke about the significant possibility of somebody knowing your whereabouts, his heart raced with excitement.

Butcher said, “Starlight did a really good job there, huh,” with a meaninful grin at Hughie's bashful but proud smile.

After a little period of time spent lost in thought, Soldier Boy eventually grabbed his shield from the corner, straightened his suit, and exclaimed, “Let's fucking give a visit this son of a bitch.”

Soldier Boy ignored Butcher and Hughie's warnings and used a forceful move to smash through the old man's door after spending hours on the road and thinking about you. Soldier Boy cast a glance in the direction of the elderly man and thought, ‘They could go fuck themselves.’ Because of his alleged scientific accomplishments about the supes, he was obviously living in luxury. As Soldier Boy cautiously made his way inside the doctor's huge home, his heart was filled with immense fury. He considered the number of times this old cunt had tormented you in order to send Vought a disgusting report.

The doctor was sitting on his couch, watching the news on TV, when he noticed Soldier Boy standing right in front of him. As the strongest supe and two other men entered his home as if they intended to kill him, he was in disbelief and did not know what to do.

After cleaning his spectacles, the doctor said in a shaky, scared voice, “What's happening? Why are all of you in my house?”

Butcher replied, “This is not very welcoming of you, old man,” and he turned off the TV before sitting down on the closest chair. Hughie swiftly but gently took the phone from the old man's hands when Butcher noticed him reaching for it. Hughie made the doctor sit down again with the same gentleness.

Soldier Boy gripped his shield more firmly, as though he were about to engage in combat with his greatest enemy. He gazed at the elderly man in front of him who was in fear and worry, and he loathed him. Still, he had good reason to be frightened. After all, that would be his last day.

“You live in a nice, big house, huh?” Soldier Boy spoke as he moved slowly in the direction of the doctor. “It appears that you made a good living off of the supes you tortured.”

As Soldier Boy approached with menacing steps and a look like a bloodthirsty murderer, the doctor gulped down nervously. “It's not what you think. I don't know how you escaped from Russia, but you need to stay calm and listen to me,” the elderly guy remarked, raising his hand in protest. “My actions were crucial for both the ongoing wellness of the world and the study of supe.”

"Why the fuck would I listen to your bullshit at all?" Standing by the elderly doctor, Soldier Boy remarked fiercely. “You tortured and used supes for money, you fucking old shit.”

The doctor raised his eyebrows slightly and replied, “Not for money. My work throughout the years has contributed to a better understanding of superhero bodies, which has made it easier to bring your kind to the pinnacle of perfection.”

Before Soldier Boy, Butcher growled, “Perfection? Fuck that. You just made the government's weapons better, served their evil shit for years. Nothing more.”

Soldier Boy battled to contain the heat rising from his chest. Instead of apologizing and beg for his life, the doctor didn't acknowledge that what he had done was wicked and immoral and continued to defend himself which made Soldier Boy even more angrier.

“I saw the explosion in New York from the TV,” the doctor said, adjusting his eyeglasses and looking at Soldier Boy carefully. “You cannot deny that what you experienced in Russia made you stronger and better.”

“I killed people there, you sick old fuck.” Soldier Boy grunted and looked at the doctor with disgust. “Have you fucking lost your humanity by examining the supes for years?”

Without letting the doctor  talk any further, Soldier Boy asked angrily, “Where is Y/N? Don’t tell me you don’t know a shit, because I fucking know you sent some reports about her to Vought.”

Butcher and Hughie worriedly watched Soldier Boy, his hand clenched into a fist, as if he may blow at any moment. Soldier Boy grew angrier the longer the old bitch talked. 

The doctor honestly said, “Yes. I spent decades working on her. I can't dispute that she's a bit of a rebel, or somewhat resistant. But because of the research we were able to conduct on her body, we were able to perfect Comp-V, which undoubtedly contributed to Queen Maeve's current status as the strongest female supe in history. And without a doubt, your body assisted Homelander in becoming the strongest supe ever.”

Hughie muttered, "Holy fucking shit," at witnessing the ascending smoke rising from Soldier Boy's chest.

“Where is she now?” Soldier Boy repeated, trying to maintain composure and control over his body while ignoring what the doctor said. “Where on earth are you keeping her concealed?”

“Calm down. I'll tell you where she is,” stated the doctor. “It appears that there will be no stopping what is about to come about, which will ultimately bring the two of you face to face with the Seven. When you get back to where you belong, you'll both realize how weak and worthless they are; you'll see they are the upgraded versions of yourselves.”

Hughie and Butcher quickly left the house after realizing that Soldier Boy would soon blow up the entire place. The doctor didn’t feel anymore as he realized it was his end. He knew such thing would happen sooner or later. He had already a good life after all.

It's fine, he thought, if it was a challenge. If needed, he could simply kill those seven whores. Soldier Boy was willing to remind them all how fucking stupid it was to fuck with him. If this fucking old dick believed he had made the new supes better than him and the rest of the world agreed with his bullshit, Soldier Boy would show them how wrong they all were.

“Where is she?” Soldier Boy growled again as he was getting closer to blow up.

“She’s in Ohio,” the doctor said, giving the full address just before Soldier Boy exploded the whole place into ashes.

This time, unlike the second explosion he had in New York, he did not pass out. He was relieved and at ease at the same time because it appeared that he was becoming more adept at using his new powers. Luckily, he was also able to locate you at last. He got in the car and gave the address he was given to Butcher, who had been looking into the damage Soldier Boy had done after leaving the burned-out house. Hughie's eyes widened in fear as he crouched where he was seated. 

After several hours, Butcher drove them to a massive, desolate structure that resembled the one in Russia. Soldier Boy was more nervous and angry than ever as he recalled unpleasant experiences, but his need to see you overcame these emotions. His gaze was fixated on the building as they all got out of the car. So that's where you were imprisoned there for years, apart from him and all alone.

Soldier Boy led the way without speaking a word, and when five guys came up to stop him from entering inside, he threw them hard against the wall. It was funny because some of them started shooting at him, like they could hurt him or something. Soldier Boy killed some of the men with his shield, cutting off their heads, and killed some of them with his bare hands, making sure not a single one remained alive.

Butcher followed behind Soldier Boy, providing his assistance with his own firearm while blasting at men who were making desperate attempts to stop them.

As Soldier Boy massacred everyone there and killed those who were wailing in agony, the place fell silent. After all, each and every one of them had a hand in hurting you.

Soldier Boy and Butcher looked everywhere for you. He knew you were in the lab when he walked into a massive, frigid room. Your soothing scent and presence were sensed throughout his entire body despite it was weak. He swiftly ripped off the metal door and killed the last person standing behind it, ripping her heart from her chest in one motion and ignoring her cries.

He found you in a similar-looking metal box to his, with an item covering your face and putting you to endless sleep. Soldier Boy approached your capsule while laying his shield on the ground and with a heavy heart.

“I kept my promise,” Butcher stated, hoping Soldier Boy wouldn’t betray their deal and thankfully, he gave him a promising nod.

“Here's my sleeping beauty,” Soldier Boy murmered, unable to contain his smile as his heart warmed upon seeing your peaceful face, before he violently tore off the metal door to free you.

Next Chapter

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A/N: Thank you for your comments for the previous chapter! They made me really happy. Comments and reblogs are very appreciated. -`♡´-

Taglist: @mostlymarvelgirl @xmariakx @spnfamily-j2 @suspicious-stain-in-spain @atomicsoulcollecto  @yvonneeeee @starryperson  @mfnqueen1 @chaand-sitara @boywivlove @stilinskisthings @brynanna @delaynew @samanddeaninatrenchcoat @yoyoanaria @n-o-p-e-never @ghostslillady @certifiedhaters

Let me know if you want to be tagged for this series! -`♡´-

[agirlwithdemonblood]

The Celebrity Next Door: Chapter 5 - Crossroads of Feelings

Pairings: Jensen Ackles x Reader

Chapter Summary: A little drinking and bonding has never hurt anyone right... Right?

Series Masterlist here!! & Main masterlist here!

It's been two weeks since I went to Jensen's for coffee, and since then, we've been growing closer. We meet up every few days for coffee and casual conversations about anything and everything, and the chemistry was defiantly building, with long gazes and subtle touches every so often, it felt like a slow burn.

I often spot Jensen walking down the street with his kids, and when he sees me, he waves, and I wave back. It was nice seeing him out and about, looking lighter and happier than when I first met him. It's all very neighbourly. Katie, his daughter, sometimes stops by when I'm checking the mail just to say hello. These small interactions have become a regular part of my routine.

But over the past few days, I've noticed less of Jensen. He'd wave when he saw me outside, but once he was back indoors, it felt like he vanished.

Well, not from my mind. Thoughts of him seemed to occupy my every moment, replaying his words and the way he said my name. It was frustrating because I found myself missing him. I didn't like being home without his presence nearby.

I started lingering longer at the office, arriving at 7:00 am and leaving at 6:00 pm. Even at home, I fought to keep myself busy with calls and contracts, trying to distract myself, to not depend on him, but nothing seemed enough.

I hated the affect he had on me already.

Today flew by faster than I wanted, and before I knew it, I was driving back to my quiet house as I did every evening. As much as I was starting to love my new life in LA, I missed having friends. I missed having people to talk to, to laugh with. Making friends here felt near impossible to me, and I didn't know where to begin.

Pulling into the driveway, I froze when I saw Jensen sitting on my porch, a bottle of wine in hand. What a nice surprise.

I smiled and stepped out of my car, making my way towards him. When he saw me, he stood up and greeted me warmly. "Y/N.. Any chance you'd like to have a drink?"

I laughed and nodded, moving to unlock my door and invite him inside. He looked around the house with genuine interest, as if he's never seen a house before, which warmed my heart.

"Wow, this place is beautiful." he commented.

I chuckled and shook my head at his compliment. "Jensen, you don't have to be polite. Compared to your house, this is just an apartment."

He shrugged with a smile. "Maybe, but mine doesn't feel like home. It's just walls and windows. Yours, though, it has this Y/N vibe all around."

"A Y/N vibe?" I repeated, amused. "I like that."

Grabbing the wine glasses, I returned to Jensen, noticing him studying a photograph on my wall. "This is cute. Who are all these people?"

I moved closer, the way his breathing hitched making me smile, "That's my dad, my mom, my sister Christina, and my other sister Stephanie, and of course me in the middle."

He smiled widely and nodded, "What a beautiful family."

Though it was a simple compliment, it meant the world to me. The word beautiful has never really been used to describe me, or my life.

"Thank you, Jensen. I haven't talked to them much since moving here, so it's been tough. But this picture always brings a smile to my face."

He frowned slightly, sipping his wine as he took another glance at the photo. "Why don't you visit them? Or have a housewarming party and invite them here?"

I laughed sadly as we moved to the couch, Jensen sitting beside me. "My parents aren't in the best financial situation so taking a flight would be hard on them, plus driving is like 41 hours so that's out."

His expression softened, eyes fixed on mine with an intensity that surprised me.

"My dad does odd jobs like painting and electric work," I explained, "My mom works at a local diner. They manage, but money's always tight. Even though their divorced, they still live together because neither one of them can move out. That's partly why I moved here, hoping to send them money to help out each month."

His expression was different than I've seen before, his eyes filled with admiration and tenderness, his usual charm replaced by a heartfelt sincerity that caught me off guard.

He was silent, and I started to feel like I said something wrong. I quickly gulped the rest of my drink and stood up from my spot, "I'm sorry, that was probably too much information. I didn't mean to turn this into a pity party."

His hand gently gripped mine, shaking himself out of his trance. "No, not at all. It's just... surprising to hear is all."

"Why?" I questioned, sitting back down beside him.

His hand remained on my arm, gaze locked on mine. "You're different from people around here. Kind, generous. I feel like people here are constantly expecting things; but you give. Like when you came to my place about Katie and the broken window, I half expected you to dance home thinking about a huge payday. That's how people usually are."

I scoffed, shaking my head. "I hate that. My parents never asked for money, and neither have I. When my window broke, I went straight to my boss to make sure you wouldn't have to pay."

He smirked, squeezing my hand. "Was it covered, though? You said it was."

I bit my lip nervously as my gaze dropped, "Doesn't really matter, right? It's fixed."

"Please tell me?" He asked softly.

I sighed and brought my gaze to his, smiling nervously. "It wasn't fully covered, actually. To file a claim, I needed your information. But I didn't know if many people knew you lived here, and I didn't want to expose you over a broken window."

Confusion flickered across Jensen's face as he looked down, his hand still holding mine. "But you didn't even know me. Why protect me, put me ahead of yourself?"

"It didn't matter who you were." I replied softly. "I wouldn't have asked for money. I only came to your house to make sure Katie got home safely; everything else was a surprise."

He froze, his eyes meeting mine with a mixture of passion and affection, his gaze drifting to my lips. His hand slowly moved to my cheek, causing my breath to hitch. Before I knew it, his lips were on mine, hands tangled in my hair.

I wrapped my arms around him, pulling him closer as we lost ourselves in each other. His knee moved between my legs and I shivered. He groaned against my lips when I scratched his back.

It felt like we were falling apart together, all our defences crumbling around us. We breathed each other in, falling into each other.

But then everything changed.

He pulled away from me unexpectedly, his expression filled with shock and fear as he looked down at me. "Shit, I... I'm sorry." he whispered.

Confusion and hurt blended in my chest. "You don't need to apologize."

He stood quickly, helping me to my feet and moving towards the door with regret in his eyes. "That wasn't supposed to happen. I didn't want that to happen."

His words hit me like a slap in the face, my heart sinking into my stomach, breath catching in my throat. "Oh... right. It was a mistake."

He halted, guilt engraved on his face. "Oh... no, Y/N, that's not—"

Forcing a smile, I opened the door for him, holding back tears threatening to spill over. "It's okay, Jensen. I should go to bed anyway. Have a good night, okay?"

He froze, shame evident on his face, trying to meet my eyes, but I couldn't bring myself to look at him.

I felt embarrassed for assuming we were on the same page, that there was something between us. Now, I was left with a broken heart and a bruised ego, wondering how I could ever face him after this.

Jensen walked away from Y/N's house with a knot of anxiety in his stomach. Guilt weighed heavily on him as he replayed the evening in his mind. He cared about her deeply, but it wasn't supposed to happen like that. He wanted to kick himself for not handing the situation better, for hurting someone who had been nothing but kind to him.

Back home, he paced the living room, unable to shake the feeling of regret. He knew he had hurt her, and the thought pained him. Y/N was special to him, different from anyone he had met since his divorce. She was genuine, caring and he felt a connection he hadn't felt in a very long time. Yet, that very connection scared him.

He ran his hand through his hair, and sighed. He couldn't stop thinking about her, her warmth, her smile, and the way she had opened up with him in a way that nobody had since his life became a whirlwind of schedules and public apperances.

He grabbed his phone several times, fingers hovering over her contacting, wanting desperately to reach out and apologize, but each time, he hesitated, unsure of what to say or if she even wanted to hear from him.

As he got into bed, he made the decision to give her some time and than make things right. He wanted to explain everything, apologize for how he handled the situation and for hurting her, hoping that when he did, she would understand but the fear of losing her was anxiety inducing, he didn't want to lose the one person who made him feel alive again.

Thank you for reading, I hope you enjoyed it! Chapter 6 coming soon stay tuned!

Like, comment, and reblog, feedback is my fuel 💕

[cheynovak]

Sugar - Part 6 

Soldier boy x F/ reader  (Y/N)      

Warnings: age difference, anger, hurst, angst

Side note: English isn’t my first language.         First time no smut in the sugar series... Don't worry I'll make it up in the next chapter

*Does not follow The Boys storyline * 

--     

Y/N is a college student who pays her apartment, bills and school tuition with the money she makes as ‘sugar baby’ for Soldier boy. What started as just being a companion on lonely moments became quickly more physical.     But how will Y/N cope with the dominant side of Ben when he finds out she has a life beside pleasuring him?   

-- 

The engine purred softly, a steady, calming sound as Y/N sat beside Ben in the passenger seat. The sun was shining bright, casting a golden hue over the world outside, and for a moment, she allowed herself to get lost in the beauty of it. It had been a long day yesterday, filled with the usual anxiety that came with introducing someone new to her parents.  

Ben had been charming and polite, just as she knew he would be, but her thoughts kept drifting back to the conversation she had with her mother this morning. 

"Y/N," her mother had said in the kitchen after breakfast, her eyes filled with curiosity and concern, "So, what exactly is going on between you and Ben? Did it change into something different than, you know...?" 

Y/N had paused, taking a moment to choose her words carefully. "Don't expect a relationship, Mom. I... I still don't know what Ben wants, but I know he doesn't want attachment. Doesn’t mean he isn’t a good man." 

“I still don’t understand why you gave up your relationship, your future for something... you know money. But it’s your life sweety, as long as your happy.”  

Y/N took a deep breath “He’s just very clear about traditional relationships.” Her mother looked at her, knowing it did her more than she would ever admit. “What about you, Y/N?” She smiled soft “I’m just glad to have him in my life.”  

She hadn't noticed Ben standing just outside the kitchen door, his face shadowed with a look of hurt that he quickly masked before joining them. “Ready to go?” he asked. Ben hadn't mentioned what he heard, and she had been too preoccupied to realize he might have overheard. 

Now, sitting beside him, the weight of that unspoken moment pressed down on her. She glanced at him out of the corner of her eye. His profile was illuminated by the sunlight, and he looked calm, as if the yesterday hadn't fazed him at all. But Y/N knew better. She knew there was more behind his silence, more than he was willing to show. 

"Yesterday was nice," she said, breaking the silence. "Thank you for coming with me." Ben turned to look at her, a small smile playing at his lips. She answered his smile with her own, but it didn't quite reach her eyes. 

Ben noticed her sad eyes and parked the car on the side of the road, Y/N looked confused. “I heard what you said to your mom this morning." Her breath caught in her throat, and she turned to face him fully. "You did?" He nodded, his eyes never leaving hers. "Yeah, I did." 

"I'm sorry," she blurted out, the words spilling out before he could stop them. "I didn't mean to... I just didn't know what to say, because I didn't want to put any pressure on you." 

He was quiet for a moment, his eyes searching hers. "Y/N, I get it. I really do. And you're right, I don’t want anything traditional. But I want you to know that I'm here because I want to be.” Her heart skipped a beat, hope blooming in her chest. 

Ben smiled, a real, genuine smile. Y/N felt a mix of emotions swirling inside her. She was happy to hear Ben's reassuring words, to feel his warm hand on her thigh, and to know that he wasn’t going anywhere.  

But there was also a lingering sadness, a small ache in her heart as she wondered why he didn't tell her exactly what he wanted. Was it because he wanted to go back to how it was before?  

No, she knew he wanted her. He had made that clear before, in the way he looked at her, in the way he touched her, and in the moments they had shared, it all had changed since the beginning. He was softer and she had declined his money in hope he noticed the change too.  

She hoped he wanted her the way she wanted him, not just as a companion or a friend, but as someone to build something with. She wanted to know if he saw a future with her, if he envisioned a life together, if he loved her the way she was beginning to realize she loved him. 

Seeing him at the dinner table with her parents, making love, it all fell into place. She knew she wanted him by her side. "Ben," she said softly, turning to face him again, "can I ask you something?" 

"Of course," he replied, his eyes gentle and attentive. 

"What do you want from us? From... this?" She gestured between them, her voice barely above a whisper. "I know you care about me, and I care about you too. But I need to know if we're on the same page." 

He took a deep breath, his expression hardening. I can't give you... I can’t say what you want to hear," he said, his tone sharp and distant. His bluntness hit her like a punch to the gut, her breath catching in her throat. “Oh-ok.” her voice trembling. 

Her heart clenched painfully, tears welling up in her eyes. "So, what are we doing then?” Ben looked away, his jaw tightening. "What we’ve been doing, it's just good for now." The words cut deep, and Y/N felt a wave of sadness and disappointment wash over her.  

"Just good for now..." she echoed, feeling her heart break a little more with each passing second. 

He turned back to her, his eyes conflicted but his expression still guarded. "I don't want to hurt you, but I can't lie to you either. I can't give you more than this.” She pulled away from him, wrapping her arms around herself as if to shield her heart from further pain. 

"I do care about you," he said, his voice softer now, but still holding back. The sun’s beauty was lost on her now, the golden light doing nothing to warm the chill that had settled in her heart. "I need more than that, Ben," she whispered, her voice thick with emotion. 

He sighed, running a hand through his hair in frustration. "I know. I can't give you that right now. Maybe... maybe you deserve someone who can." 

She looked down, her tears spilling over and falling onto her lap. "Maybe I do," she said quietly, her heart breaking. The silence between them was heavy, filled with unspoken words and shattered while they made their way home.  

Ben's hands gripped the steering wheel tightly, his knuckles white with tension. He kept glancing over at Y/N, but she stared straight out of her window, her face a mask of sadness and resignation.  

When they finally pulled up outside her building, Y/N didn't wait for him to say anything. She unbuckled her seatbelt and opened the door, stepping out into the cool evening air. "Goodnight, Ben," she said quietly, her voice devoid of its usual warmth. 

"Y/N, wait," he called after her, but she was already walking away, her shoulders hunched against the pain she was feeling. Ben watched her go, feeling a deep sense of regret and conflict.  

He knew he had broken her heart, and the weight of that knowledge was almost too much to bear. He wanted to run after her, to tell her that he did want her, that he wanted a future with her. But the fear of not being able to live up to her needs, of failing her, held him back. 

As she reached the entrance of her apartment building, she turned around one last time, her eyes meeting his as he stood by the car. In that moment, he saw the raw hurt and disappointment she was feeling, and it cut him to the core. 

"Y/N," he started, taking a step towards her. She shook her head, a single tear slipping down her cheek. “Please don’t.” and then she was gone, disappearing into the building. 

Ben stood there for a long moment, his heart aching with the weight of his indecision. He wanted to chase after her, to hold her and tell her everything she wanted to hear. But the fear of not being enough, of not being able to meet her needs, kept him rooted to the spot. 

He finally got back into his car, his mind a whirlwind of thoughts and emotions. As he drove away, the image of her tear-streaked face haunted him. Once home, Ben sat in the darkness of his living room, the silence pressing in on him.  

He replayed the moment in his mind, over and over, until he couldn't stand it any longer.  

The week that followed was one of the longest Ben had ever experienced. Each day dragged on, filled with an emptiness that gnawed at him. He knew he should call Y/N, should try to make things right, but his stubbornness and fear kept him from picking up the phone.  

He was afraid of facing the emotions he had stirred up, both in himself and in her. One afternoon, unable to stand the silence any longer, Ben decided to go to Y/N’s college. He had never been there before, but he needed to see her. 

As he walked through the bustling halls, he finally spotted her in the courtyard, surrounded by students. 

She was in the middle of a lively conversation, her face lit up with a smile as she spoke with a young man. The sight of her laughing and looking so at ease sent a sharp pang of jealousy through Ben. He stood there, rooted to the spot, watching as the young man leaned in closer to say something, causing Y/N to laugh even harder. 

Unable to contain his emotions, Ben strode over to her, his expression dark and brooding. Y/N noticed him approaching and excused herself from the group, walking over to meet him halfway. 

"Ben, what are you doing here?" she asked, surprise evident in her voice. 

He didn’t respond to her question. Instead, his jealousy and frustration boiled over, and he lashed out. "Who was that?" he demanded, his voice harsher than he intended. "Why are you flirting with him?" 

Her eyes widened in shock, and she took a step back. "What? No, Ben, he's just a friend. We were talking about a job opportunity at his fathers shop." The students nearby, sensing the tension, began to whisper among themselves, wondering who the older man was and why she seemed so upset. 

Ben ignored the curious glances and stepped closer to Y/N, his anger not yet spent. "A job opportunity? It didn't look like that to me. You seemed pretty cozy with him or is that it? Find someone new that quick huh." 

Y/N's shock turned to anger, and she crossed her arms over her chest. "You don’t get to come here and accuse me of things, Ben. Especially after a week of silence. You don't get to do this." 

He couldn't help but let his emotions get the better of him. "How can I trust you when you're surrounded by people like him?" Ben blurted out, his voice rising again. 

Y/N's eyes flared with anger. "Ben, stop! This is ridiculous. You're making a scene."- "I don’t care!" Ben shouted, the frustration and fear bubbling over. "You need to understand how it looks!" 

Y/N took a step back, her face flushing with both anger and embarrassment. "How it looks? Do you hear yourself? This is my education, my life! You don’t get to come in here and act like this. I have a life besides you!" 

Ben’s expression hardened. "Well, maybe you should find someone else to pay for your school then. Maybe your friend over there is willing to pay you, or maybe his daddy dearest will.”  

The words hung in the air like a toxic cloud, and Y/N's face went pale. Around them, the students who hadn't yet left the courtyard stopped and stared, whispers spreading like wildfire. 

"Ben," Y/N said, her voice trembling with a mix of fury and hurt, "Leave. Now." Ben's eyes widened as he realized what he had just implied, but before he could say anything, Y/N turned on her heel and marched away, her back rigid with anger. 

He stood there, stunned, as the gravity of his words hit him. He had meant it as a low blow in his frustration, but the damage was done. The students who overheard were already piecing together their own version of events, and rumours began to circulate. 

The next few days were a nightmare for Y/N. Everywhere she went, she felt the eyes of her peers on her, heard the hushed whispers following her down the hallways. Guy coming up at her asking what they can get for 50 bucks.  

"Did you hear what he said?" 

"Is he really paying her way like that?" 

"I can't believe it. She seemed so nice." 

Y/N tried to ignore the gossip, focusing on her classes and her work, but the constant buzz was wearing her down. Her professors noticed the change in her, and one even pulled her aside to ask if everything was okay. She managed to put on a brave face, but inside, she was crumbling. 

One afternoon, as she was heading to the library, she was confronted by the young man Ben had seen her with. He looked genuinely concerned. "Y/N, can we talk?" he asked, his voice gentle. 

She sighed, nodding reluctantly. "Sure, what’s up.” "I heard what happened," he said, keeping his voice low. "People are saying some awful things, and I know they're not true. I just wanted to check if you were okay." 

Y/N felt tears prickling at the corners of her eyes but blinked them back. "Thank you.” You shouldn't have to deal with this alone. Is there anything I can do to help?" She shook her head. "I appreciate it, but I need to handle this myself." 

As he walked away, Y/N's phone buzzed with a missed call. It was from Ben. Her fingers hovered over the screen, but she couldn't bring herself to reply. Not yet. The wound was too fresh, the hurt too deep. 

That evening, Ben sat in his apartment, staring at his phone, hoping for a response that never came. He knew he had crossed a line, and the realization of what he had done was eating him alive. 

Unable to sit still, he grabbed his jacket and headed out, his mind racing. He found himself outside Y/N's apartment, seeing the lights were out in her apartment. He sat on the steps, waiting, hoping she would come home soon so he could at least see her, apologize, try to make things right. 

When she finally arrived, she stopped short at the sight of him. Her face hardened, and she walked past him without a word. "Y/N," he called after her, standing up. "I need to talk to you." She turned around, her eyes blazing. "You've done enough, Ben. Just go home." 

He took a step towards her holding her arm. “Listen to me.” Her eyes locked on to his, ice cold. "No" she snapped. "Do you have any idea what you've done to me.” Ben opened his mouth to respond, but she cut him off. "No, Ben. We're done. You need to leave me alone. I can't deal with this anymore." 

“Y/N” He could barely say her name.  

Her eyes teared. “I thought this whole macho toxic persona was just a wall you build up. I would have done anything for you! But to belittle me like this, to embarrass me in the middle of a courtyard full of people when I don’t react the way you want me to, when I need time to deal with my emotions, is where I draw the line.”  

She took a deep breath,  

“I’m done, Ben.”  

-- 

Let me know what you think, feel free to like, share or comment. Make sure you check out my masterlist.      

Tag list: -> If you want to be added just let me know what you like to read. @syrma-sensei @suckitands33 @mostlymarvelgirl @globetrotter28 @jackles010378 @hobby27 @call-me-mrs-winchester @yvonneeeee

[highfunctioningflailgirl]

Damage Control - 1x12 Faith

Dean is so unlike Dean when they leave for Nebraska the next morning, it hurts to see. He’s acting like Dean - the bravado, the self-deprecating jokes, the refusal to accept help - but he’s so weak that it’s a complete shit show, and Sam can see right through it. His brother moves like an octogenarian, slowly and using every surface his hands find for support. When he comes out of the shower, he has to sit down and catch his breath, his lips tinged blue, and no amount of complaining about the water pressure or claiming that all he needs is coffee will mask his frailty. Frailty. Not a word Sam thought he’d ever use for his unstoppable brother, but here it is.

Sam inconspicuously helps him pack, placing Dean’s items within reach to speed up the process. When they’re finally in the car, Sam insists on two stops - one for a healthy breakfast to go, and one at the hospital to pick up the medication Dean left behind when he checked himself out. One of them - a diuretic to take the strain off Dean’s ailing heart - makes him have to pee every hour or so, and the jokes about it quickly turn into sullen silence when they have to stop at yet another gas station.

Dean sleeps a lot between bathroom breaks, and while he’s always been able to immediately drop into slumber in the safety of the Impala, no matter how uncomfortable his position in the passenger seat, it’s a different kind of sleep now. Not the deep-breathing, childlike oblivion Dean usually has about him, all fanning lashes, parted lips and loose limbs. Now, his shallow breathing is barely audible, his brow is furrowed, and he looks so grey that Sam feels the urge to check his pulse every now and then. 

How did this happen? How did Sam let this happen? 

He should’ve been with Dean. Could’ve kept the idiot from using a taser while sitting in a puddle of fucking water. Physics, man! Had Dean never paid attention in school?! He wishes it’d been the other way around - Dean taking the kids to safety while Sam finished off the Rawhead. None of this would’ve happened and they’d be on their next hunt now instead of on a Hail Mary tour to a faith healer to keep Dean from dying of goddamn heart failure at twenty-six.

As if feeling Sam’s anger, Dean stirs beside him, one hand lifting to his chest to rub at it even before he’s fully awake. His face creases in discomfort, and his eyes flutter open, disoriented and bloodshot. 

“You okay?” Sam asks immediately.

“Yeah.” Dean coughs dryly and sounds anything but okay. “Where are we?”

“Bout halfway. You need anything?”

Dean grimaces. “Gotta take a piss.” He shakes his head, looking drawn. “I swear, Sammy, this is the last time I’ve taken those stupid pills. I feel like a fucking sprinkler system.”

“You can’t stop taking them, Dean. They keep fluids from building up in your system. If you don’t take them, you’ll—“ Sam stops. He can’t go there.

“My ankles will swell to elephant size and I’ll drown in my own gunk,” Dean finishes cynically. “I heard what the doctor said, Sam. But frankly, I don’t care. If I only have a couple weeks left, I’d rather not spend half of them in front of urinals.”

“Dean…” 

“What?” He throws up his hands in frustration, and even that small gesture looks like an effort. “It’s my life — well, my death. I get to decide what to do with it!”

He coughs again, and his breathing turns into that of a spent runner. Not for the first time, Sam thinks they should have brought the portable oxygen kit the hospital had offered, but, of course, Dean had refused. 

“Hey, easy!” Sam says, cranking the window open for a little more air. “One: You’re not dying. I’m taking you to a specialist who’ll fix you up. And two: You’re taking the medicine. If this works out, you won’t need to take it much longer. And I don’t mind the pit stop. I need coffee.”

“Make that two.” 

“Dean, you’re not supposed to—“

“Coffee, dude! And pie.”

At least his appetite is still normal.

Sam finds a Gas ‘n Sip and pulls up to the entrance as close as possible. Their short walk inside is this new tug-of-war of Sam offering assistance and Dean rejecting it until he loses to his weakened body and ends up leaning on Sam with an expression of grievous defeat. Sam helps him back to the Impala before getting their order of coffee and pie - pecan for Dean - and getting back on the road.

To his dismay, Sam watches his brother lose interest in his favorite food only halfway through, and that’s another unsettling new development to add to the quickly growing list. Dean listlessly picks at the pie with the plastic fork until he just stops and deflates, looking out the window with a thousand-yard-stare.

Sam’s own heart clenches in his chest. He can’t imagine Dean going down like this - frail, defeated, drained. And with no resistance whatsoever. Dean’s always been a fighter. Where is that fight now? 

“It’s only a couple more hours, Dean,” he feels compelled to say. “We’ll get you right. You’ll see.”

Dean trains his big, wet, deeply shadowed eyes on him. “No, we won’t, Sammy.”

“Dean!” Sam grips the steering wheel harder. “How can you say that! I found this specialist, and he can save you!”

Dean shakes his head. “No, he can’t. Whatever hotshot doctor he is, Sam, it’s not gonna save me. It’s too late. I can feel it.”

Anger rises in Sam. “What’s wrong with you?”

“Well, there’s this heart condition I have…” 

“No, you fucking idiot!” Sam’s not taking it. “I mean what’s wrong with you? Why aren’t you fighting this? Why are you just giving up? That’s not you, man!”

“Because there’s nothing to fight, Sammy!” A blotch of color creeps into Dean’s pale cheeks. “I know how to gank a monster. I know how to torch a ghost. But this? There’s nothing to go up against! We always say ‘If you can grab it, you can kill it.’ But there’s nothing to grab here! Nothing to kill! There’s no way out, Sammy! And you gotta accept that.”

“I’ll never accept it,” Sam answers, and he fixes his brother with a determined stare. “I’m gonna save you. You’ll see. You’ll see.”

Dean huffs as if he’s dealing with a basket case and shrinks back into his seat. “Whatever.” The conversation seems to have depleted him. His lips have taken on that bluish tint again, and he’s holding his paper cup with both hands, shoulders tucked in, as if huddling for warmth.

“Want a blanket?” 

“Shut up.”

Sam steps on the gas. If Dean doesn’t want to fight, he’ll have to do it for the both of them.

Read the entire series on AO3 here:

[jawritter]

Carry On

Chapter 24

Summary: It was just a simple hunt, found on a pie festival. It was supposed to be easy. Something they’d all done one hundred and one times a million. No one could have told Y/N, Dean, and Sam that nothing from that point on would ever be the same again.

Pairing: Dean Winchester x Reader x Sam Winchester

Word Count: 3k

Warnings: PISSSTTTTT!!!! Here be smut! (I know you guys are gonna freak out when you see that warning lol.) 

Due to the graphic nature of this fic, and the fact that it will eventually contain Smut. This fic is an 18 + only fic! If you’re under 18 DO NOT read this fic!

A/N: This fic is beta’d by @kazsrm67​​​​ Thanks so much love! Please do not copy my work! Feedback is golden! I hope you all enjoy this ride with me!

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“Dean, come on, the show’s over,” Y/N laughed as she grabbed Dean’s hand and tugged, the lights were just coming back on in the theater, and the music from the credits were still blaring loudly all around the pair of them. Dean hadn’t budged when the rest of the movie goers had stood up when the show had ended, in fact, he sat with his eyes glued to the giant screen. 

Dean gave her a weak smile, and then slowly stood to his feet. He was stalling, she could tell. 

Even though she’d given him strict orders to stay in bed today while she ran her errands, and to not overthink any of this, apparently that’s exactly what he’d spent the day doing. She shouldn’t have been surprised really; Dean was the king of overthinking. 

“You never know,” he said, attempting to keep his voice light. “Sometimes they put shit after the credits are over.”

“I doubt that they have anything after that, that ending pretty much said it all,” Y/N giggled, and Dean shrugged as they shoved their way out of the darkish theater, and into the lighter hallways that lead to the exit doors, causing them both to squint. 

Dean wasted no time however, in rushing the pair of them through the crowded exit, and out into the parking lot, through the drizzling rain, and back into the safety and security of his Baby. Which wasn’t unusual for Dean, and had nothing to do with the fact that they were out in public, or that they were technically on a date; Dean just didn’t like being out in the open like that period. Old hunter paranoia probably. It was just something Dean now did that she thought nothing of. 

He did seem a lot more relaxed once he was back behind the wheel, and turning the key to send warm air filtering through the car. It was oddly still cold this time of year in Kansas. Normally by now they were starting to get the first hints of warmer weather, but it was as if the bitter cold refused to let go this time. 

“You wanna go grab some ice cream before we head home,” Dean offered, she could almost hear the tightness in his voice;  she knew Dean well enough to know that given the opportunity he’d try to exhaust her so that when they got home, she’d be ready to go to bed; without any extracurricular activities. That wasn’t going to help him though. Like it or not, the only way to overcome this irrational fear of his body was to face it head on. 

“Nah, I’m not really in the mood for ice cream,” Y/N deflected easily. “Why don’t we just head back for the night, it’s already almost 10, and most everything in this little town is gonna be closing down shortly anyway.”

She had a point there. Everything around here but the local watering hole, and the movie theater shut down at 9 PM, but she wasn’t about to give him the idea of going to the bar either. She wanted this to happen sober, for the both of them, and given the opportunity, Dean would make sure he was well and drunk beforehand so as to not remember what was to happen next. 

Dean didn’t argue with her as she expected, instead he just turned onto the main road towards home, driving past Winchester’s Auto Repair; over the rain-dampened streets towards home. She could see by the tightness of his chiseled jawline that he was overthinking what was to come, and she needed to break the ice a little, or else he was going to clam up on her any moment, and it would take days for him to open up again. 

“So,” she said, clearing her throat slightly to gain his attention. “When was the last time you’ve been to a movie?”

The question did as it was intended, and took the elder Winchester off guard, causing his brow to furrow as he continued to direct the sleek, black Impala down the empty suburban streets. 

“I think I was seventeen,” he answered after a while. “We’d been on a hunt for a while, and Dad and Bobby were having a tough time tracking down a shapeshifter in town. Sammy and I had been enrolled in the local school, and I met a girl there. She was only a year younger than me. I walked to her house one night, and took her to see a movie. The theater was only three blocks from her house. I don’t even remember what we were going to see, but as I walked into the place, the guy that was standing behind the counter selling popcorn and overpriced drinks eyes flashed white and I knew I found our guy. So, while the movie was playing, I slipped out and shot the shifter in the back of the head… I didn’t even bother going back in to get her, I just walked out, told Dad what I’d done, and we left town. That was it.”

A heaviness settled over Y/N; a suffocating one. It wasn’t fair that a seventeen-year-old boy had to live a life of such horror and violence that he wasn’t even able to take a girl he liked on a date. Then it hit her, the echoes of the past that were etched on his face as a reminder that Dean Winchester was anything but weak. In fact, the man was a killer by nature. He’d been bred and raised to be hard. John’s little soldier. That definitely wasn’t fair, but it made sense why the transition to normalcy wasn’t ever gonna be an easy one. Every time he’d even gotten a taste of what he thought might be normal, it was either ripped away from him by the hand of John Winchester himself, or the life that John had forced Dean to lead. Either way, the fault always seemed to fall to John. Y/N had to agree with Sam about that. 

“I’m sorry Dean, that’s horrible,” Y/N apologized, suddenly afraid that she’d single handedly put a damper on the entire evening and totally regretting that she had asked him anything about his past at all. 

“It’s okay,” Dean assured her as he turned onto their street, a tight smile gracing his face, showing off those eye crinkles that unquestioningly seemed to give her life. They could absolutely chase away any kind of darkness, she was convinced of it. 

“My life might not have been a fucking nineties sitcom sweetheart, but I can say I’ve seen and experienced things, and gone to places that no one else ever would. I don’t regret what I did that night. Hell, just in killing that one shifter, I saved countless other people. So, what if I didn’t get to get my dick wet, or say that I was able to walk the prom queen home from the movies while her ‘boyfriend’ was at home with a horrible case of mono that he contracted from cheating on her with almost every other girl on the cheerleading squad. All that shit is really trivial when I think back on it now, and if I wouldn’t have been where I was and hunting when we met, well, then I don’t think you’d be here sitting next to me right now, sounding like a really old fucking man.”

There was a chuckle in Dean’s voice, and it astounded her that even though his life had been anything but a bed of roses that he was even remotely able to see the bright side of it all. It was a true testament to the character that Dean tried to keep hidden, and definitely the reason that, after everything, he was still here. Still fighting. 

“Well, enough with the heavy,” Dean diverted after a moment, before she could even say anything at all. She was impressed that he’d opened up as much as he had tonight, his past wasn’t something he liked to talk a whole lot about, not that she blamed him. 

“What else you got on that little agenda tonight huh?” Dean questioned, giving her a smirk that could have melted the paint off of a fucking car. 

It was as if she felt the air shift between them, which sent a live wire straight through her veins, and caused her to openly shiver. 

Y/N shrugged, doing her best to play it cool, even though she had Dean Winchester in the flesh, looking at her like he was a predator, and she his prey. Something she had not seen from Dean in a long time, and never directed at her, usually it was at some bar room woman with more boobs than brain. 

That’s when she decided that if this was the way he was comfortable with this game going, then she was going to let him take the lead. Forcing herself to be his girlfriend for once, give him the lead, stop treating him like some child that needed her help with every little fucking thing, and stop being his fucking caregiver. 

“I don’t know,” she played coyly, twisting her hair in her fingers as she forced her eyes away from his piercing green oceans and to look over the expanse of their home instead for full effect. “Maybe I’ll go draw a bath, have some alone time before bed, read a book.”

Dean all but snorted with laughter as he kicked the door open and stepped out, flinging his hair slightly, and she wondered when he’d cut it, because he sure reminded her of Sam when he did that. Not that Dean with long hair and a light beard wasn’t attractive; it fucking was, it was just the little traits she saw of Sam in his older brother…. Or maybe it was the other way around and she never bothered to notice before. 

She watched in silence as Dean shuffled his way around the car, a smirk still firmly planted on his plump, naturally pink lips as he opened her door, and in a gesture older than them both, reached for her hand to help her stand out of the car. 

“I mean, I guess you could do that, it does sound nice,” Dean ventured, closing the car door once she was fully stepped out onto the pavement, before suddenly shifting the pair of them to pin her tiny frame against the cool, somewhat rain-dampened steel of Baby’s exterior; sealing his lips to hers in a breathtaking kiss that drove the cool mist of lightly fallen rain slowly soaking them both clean out of her mind. “Or you can come to bed with me.”

The deepened trimble of his rough voice  vibrated from his solid chest to hers, combined with his warm breath that brushing over her kiss swollen lips in contrast with the nipping wind on her face damn near had her melting at his feet. Her head was swimming with everything that was Dean Winchester, from his broad, thick shoulders, to the taste of his chewing gum still tingling on her lips. Suddenly, she wasn’t sure she could survive this encounter, because the man had barely put a hand on her, and it was already more intoxicating of an experience than she'd ever imagined. 

“I’m pretty sure I like your idea a lot better,” she stammered once she finally got her mind to work in combination with her lips as Dean worked to derail her train of thought by trailing his lips and tongue along her jawline to her ear lobe. 

With a playful nip of her suddenly very sensitive skin, Dean forced himself off of her, lacing his fingers with hers, leading her towards the front door that was illuminated by the warm, glowing porch light they’d left on before leaving home for the evening. 

Neither really paid it all that much attention though. Just as they paid little to no attention to Dean unlocking the front door to let her step inside the warm, safety of home. Nor did either party really register the way Dean tossed their coats haphazardly towards the back of the couch as they made their way towards the stairs to make the assent to their shared room. Both seemed to be suddenly trapped in the surreal fog of the shock that this is going to happen. There was a determination in the squareness of Dean’s shoulders, there was no turning back now. His mind was made up. 

With his face set in an unreadable mask, Dean closed the outside world behind him, and with a flick of his wrist, locked the door. That's when her heart started drumming a fast pace rhythm in her rib cage, and she came face to face with her own fears, insecurities, and anxiety. 

What if she did something wrong? What if she hurt him? What if she was pushing him too fast? What if this is the ultimate mistake that would shatter him?

"Hey," Dean's voice captured her attention, and she was stunned at how close to her he was suddenly standing, allowing his finger to trail over her cheek before pulling her into his warm embrace. "Are you okay?"

Y/N swallowed whatever lump had formed in her vocal chords and nodded, grounding herself in the warmth and stillness of his body holding her against him. 

"I'm okay," Y/N assured him. "I'm more worried about you than myself. I don't want you to feel like we're doing this just because of me."

Dean shook his head before letting go of her long enough to pull off the hunter green Henley he was wearing, and allowed it to fall to the floor. 

"No, I'm just as much into this as you are," he assured her. "Regardless of how this turns out, I want to be close to you, and that's all that matters."

With more urgency and control than Dean had ever shown her before, his lips collided with her own in a battle of teeth and tongue as he slowly walked her towards the bed in the center of the room, clothes falling to the floor as they went, in a shower of panted breaths and pounding hearts until the back of her knees hit the bed, and she crawled her way to the top of the bed with Dean crawling over her, his lips still in pursuit of hers. 

"You're gorgeous sweetheart," he whispered against her lips as they both halted to catch their breath. "I don't tell you that enough." 

"Speak for yourself handsome," she assured him, allowing her fingers to trace the line of freckles that speckled his shoulders. 

Deep, hooded, green orbs traced the line of her face, and worked their way down her bare body before his lips made their descent from her throat, to her breast; taking his time with each nipple until she was writhing underneath the thick frame of him. 

"Dean," she pleaded with him as he began to rut his thick length against her already soaked and throbbing center. The head of his cock pressing against her swollen clit with each pass he made. 

"Goddammit baby girl," Dean breathed, his eyes damn near rolling in their sockets as he continued rutting against her.  "So close already and I've barely touched you. Can you cum for me like this?" 

Her words stuck in her throat somehow as the pressure in her body built until a moan ripped through her body as her vision went white, and her body shook into her release. 

"Fuck," Dean swore as he pressed his cock into her quivering cunt, and she screamed at his intrusion. 

He was massive and long. Dean slowly thrust in and out of her cunt, drawing out her orgasm as long as he could before her body finally started to adjust to him, and he began to set a steady pace. 

Lips found hers in a heated kiss as he started to fuck her in earnest. Pent up frustration and need started to bubble over in a mess of skin, sweat, and groans, as their bodies worked together with one another. Every drag of his impressive manhood sent that same rubber band tightening tighter and tighter as his hips rolled harder and harder, pressing his pelvis into her clit with each calculated thrust until suddenly; he stopped, teeth gritted, and breath caught in his throat as pleasure started to fade into pain.

But she didn't let it faze him, he was doing too well, he was far too close to a much-needed release; so, she hooked her leg around his waist and used the force of her body to turn them over.  The switch distracted him from whatever it was he was feeling, and his eyes rolled back into his head as her hips moved, picking up where he left off. 

As soon as she saw that she wasn't hurting him, she began to ride him in earnest and fuck, she didn't know if she'd ever felt so fucking full in her life. The change in angle increased the friction in the places she needed him most, but as his hips lifted to meet her, thrust for thrust, desperate and chasing his own end in a moaning mess underneath her, she saw stars. Her velvet  walls clamped down hard around his dick, and he exploded inside of her as they came together, both of them riding the wave of bliss until they were an exhausted, trembling mess. 

When she'd come down, she slowly dismounted him, and quickly made her way to the bathroom to clean herself up, and return with a warm cloth to clean Dean up too. 

Heavy green eyes watched in silence until she was done, and he pulled the cover over himself and lifted it for her to join him. 

Suddenly, she was beyond tired, her limbs felt like jello as the adrenalin drained from her body. She found solace in the warmth of his skin against her own, and the steady, calm rise and fall of his chest under her hand. 

"Are you okay?" Y/N questioned, and Dean cleared his throat as her voice stirred him awake from the doze he'd slipped into. 

"Yeah, it didn't hurt like I thought it would. The more we work at it, the more I will learn my limitations and things will get easier, but for now baby rest, don't worry about me, I'm better than I've ever been."

So was she, if she was honest. She was better than she'd been in a long, long time.

Forever:

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@deanwanddamons​​​​​​​​​​

@rvgrsbrns​​​​​​​​​​

@chevyharvelle​​​​​​​​​

@i-love-superhero-movies​​​​​​​​​​

@lyss-dw79​​​​​​​​

@magssteenkamp​​​​​​​​​​

@lemondropirwin​​​​​​​​​​

@squirrelnotsam​​​​​​​​​​

@hobby27​​​​​​​​​​

@spnbaby-67​​​​​​​​​​  

@mrsjenniferwinchester​​​​​​​​​​

@defenderrosetyler​​​​​​​​​​

@thecreatiivecorner​​​​​​​​​​  

@vicmc624​​​​​​​​​​

@busy-bee-angel-misska​​​​​​​​​​

@justanotherwinchester​​​​​​​​​

@brilovesdeanwinchester​​​​​​​​​

@idksupernatural​​​​​​​​​​

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@itmejado

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@vulgar-library​​​​​​​​​​

@writercole​​​​​​​​​​

@fairlyspnfanfic​​​​​​​​​​

@sexyvixen7​​​​​​​​​​

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@donnaintx​​​​​​​​​​

@maliburenee​​​​​​​​​​

@the-family-business67​​​​​​​​​​

@agirlwithdemonblood​​​​​​​​​​

@captainsoldiergirl​​​​​​​​​​

@twinkleinadiamondsky​​​​​​​​​​

Jensen and Dean’s Babes

@deans-baby-momma​​​​​​​​​​  

@impalaslytherin​​​​​​​​​​

@perpetualabsurdity​​​​​​​​​​

@msmarvelouswinchester​​​​​​​​​​

@akshi8278​​​​​​​​​​

@love-jackles​​​​​​​​​​

@irmcpar​​​​​​​​​​

@pink-sparkly-witch​​​​​​​​​​

@deans-spinster-witchs-favorites​​​​​​​​​​

@herstarburststories​​​​​​​​​​

@mimaria420​​​​​​​​​​

@deanwinchesterswitch​​​​​​​​​​

@charred-angelwings​​​​​​​​​​

@pascal-rascal424​​​​​​​​​​

@myloversgone​​​​​​​​​​

@fortheloveof-jackles​​​​​​​​​​

@eevvvaa​​​​​​​​​​

@bts-spnlvr12​​​​​​​​​​

@jxackles

@lassie-bird​​​​​​​​​​

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@mlovesstories​​​​​​​​​​

@ladysparks78

@sarahgracej​

[lucidlivi]

Chosen For Pleasure (IX)

Series Masterlist/Warnings

Tag List: @ladysparkles78 @suckitands33 @little-x-wolf @stoneyggirl2 @creative-writing92 @jc-winchester @mrsjenniferwinchester @lessons-of-red @jamerlynn @deans-baby-momma @willow-sages @ritz-hell-hotel @perpetualabsurdity @mhessellund @itzabbyxx @chriszgirl92 @abbybarnesstuff @larrem88 @commonsenseishard @impalaspixie @notsogoofyjelly @hzllxhoundxx @taylortots-world @kazsrm67 @k-slla @heavenlyackles @spnfamily-j2 @buckybarnes-1917 (oh my! if you look at the beginning to now you can see how much we’ve grown! I love you all! If you would like to be added please send me a message or an ask!)

Did ya miss me?

“can we please try again? I promise to be more open, I promise to work on my intimacy issues. I promise I will never hurt you that way again.” He pleaded.

“okay but one condition.”

“what’s that?”

“we take it slow.”

“I don’t know if I know how to take anything slow.” Jensen laughed rubbing a hand along his neck.

I leaned in close so we were just centimeters apart. Jensen swallowed, looking from my lips to my eyes.

“you’ll learn.” I whispered.

I smirked as I pulled away from him. Jensen sighed rolling his eyes before offering me a smile.

“besides you have some making up to do, didn’t think you were going to get off that easy did you?”I laughed getting out of the backseat.

“okay that’s fair, how about I pick you up after work tomorrow and we go to dinner?” He countered getting out too.

“hmmm intriguing, but I have a better idea, how about you pick me up after work and we make dinner at my place?”

“sounds like a date.” He smiles.

Jensen and I stood in silence, taking in each other’s presence.

“I um should get going, cause I really want to rip that little black dress off of you.” Jensen says licking his lips.

I felt the heat pool between my legs.

“down boy.” I laughed causing him to chuckle as well.

“I’ll see you tomorrow though, right?” He asked as if he were unsure I still wanted to see him.

“yes sir.” I tease with a smile.

Jensen leans in placing a tender kiss on my cheek. As he’s about to walk away his name is being called.

“Mr. Ackles wait up!”

A girl runs over with two frames in her hand.

“here are your pictures sir, I can see you already met the photographer, so you can just pay her directly then.”

I watch as the girl walks away looking frazzled. I turn back around to see Jensen with his checkbook out.

“what are you doing?”

“paying for my pictures, you heard the girl.” He said filling out a check.

“Jensen I don’t want your money.” I argue.

“please I make this kind of money every hour.” He shrugs like it’s no big deal.

He smiles at me before ripping one of the checks out and handing it to me.

Sure enough it’s a check for $40,000.

I give him a look before ripping the check to shreds.

“I don’t want your money.” I said more sternly this time.

He rolls his eyes annoyed by my antics.

“but they’re such good pictures.” He says holding them up and looking at them.

something tells me this was the first time he was actually seeing them.

“yeah they are, wonder who took them?” I joked.

“oh just this perfect woman that I’m falling in love with.” Jensen shrugs.

A blush instantly formed on my cheeks.

“hmm she sounds like a keeper, better not mess this up.” I whispered before biting my bottom lip.

Jensen leaned in close, lips near my ear.

“I don’t plan on it sweetheart.”

Jensen gave me one last peck on the cheek before sauntering away. I couldn’t help but to watch him in awestruck.

“I’m falling in love with you.”

His words replayed like an echo in my head. I couldn’t believe he was really falling in love with me. It was all too surreal.

I got an alert on my phone snapping me back to reality. It was a notice from my bank.

a deposit in the amount of $40,000 has been made to your account.

Jensen.

How?

I growled shaking my head, I would definitely have to talk to him about this tomorrow.

****************************************************

I felt extremely awkward going in to work the next day.

I had no clue why Gray was acting the way he was, but I felt like I owed him an apology, at least for Jensen’s behavior.

Stella was shocked when I told her what went down between the two men.

“oh my god they’re battling for your affection.”

“don’t be ridiculous Stella.”

I sighed getting out of the car slowly. I caught sight of Gray as he was walking in to the office.

“hey Gray, you got a second?”

He snapped his head up giving me a glare.

“make it quick I’m busy.” He snapped.

“doing what, you just got here?” I sassed back.

He rolled his eyes and continued to walk towards the office. I took a deep breath chasing after him. He made it so hard to be nice to him.

“I wanted to apologize for Jensen’s behavior.” I called while running to catch up with his quick strides.

At my words he stopped dead in his tracks forcing my body to collide with his. I fell back, my butt hitting the pavement.

“why would you need to apologize for him.” Gray asked crossing his arms across his chest.

I stood up dusting myself off trying to formulate a response.

“for how he talked to you, he just has a lot going on and we’re sort of back together so I feel that it’s my responsibility to..” I started to ramble but Gray cut me off.

“I think you’re making a mistake.”

“what?”

“being with him, you’re making a mistake.”

I stood silent in shock.

He rolled his eyes before walking in to the office

I couldn’t help but feel bad as I made my way in too.

I sometimes wandered if I was making a mistake too. Jensen came with a lot of baggage, sometimes I didn’t know if I was equipped to handle all of it.

As soon as I walked in all sets of eyes flickered in my direction.

Oh god.

What now?

I glanced back at Stella to see her nervously looking at her computer. I sped through the cubicles to reach her desk.

“how bad is it?” I asked biting my nails.

It was a nervous habit.

“well unless you don’t mind being called a gold digger, not too terrible.” she said turning her computer around.

It was another article, this time it was a picture of me and Jensen from the auction last night. It was when we were standing in the hallway, and I was yelling at him.

Ackles pays $40,000 for pictures from rumored girlfriend. Is she only after his money?

“do these people have anything better to do?” I growled slamming the laptop shut.

“how do they find out this information so quick I mean it literally happened yesterday?”

A realization washed over me making me sick to my stomach.

“Gray, it has to be.” I said racking my brain.

Gray was one of the organizers of the event last night. I mean it doesn’t explain the first leak to the press but it has to be him.

“but how, he didn’t know any of the other information.”

I knew she was probably right, maybe I just wanted someone to blame.

“I don’t know Stell, but it has to be him.”

“I guess we’ll just have to prove it then.”

I slumped in my seat sighing.

Even when I was winning it felt like I was losing.

It was silent between us until Stella spoke up.

“soooo $40,000 huh?”

I rolled my eyes looking at her.

“right not the time.”

I couldn’t help but start laughing at my best friend. She always knew how to make light of every situation.

I ignored the glances from my nosy coworkers and tried to be productive. It made the day go by faster. It was close to the end of the day when Gray approached our desks.

“may I have a word with you?” He asked standing in front of me.

I slowly nodded standing up to follow him.

“get some dirt.” Stella mouthed to me making me roll my eyes in response.

I walked in to his office sitting down on one of the plush chairs.

“is this about the article?” I hesitantly pried.

“did you book our rooms for the convention in New York this weekend?” He asked completely ignoring my question.

“uh our rooms?”

“did you or didn’t you?” He asked annoyed.

“I mean, yeah I booked your room, I didn’t know I was supposed to book one for me to.”

“It’s expected that my senior editor be in attendance as well.”

“I’m sorry sir, I didn’t know.”

“well now you do, so go book yourself a room.” He said opening the door to dismiss me.

I walked out seeing most of the people leaving for the day. I sat down at my desk pulling up hotels in New York. I didn’t really want to spend a weekend in New York, especially with Gray, but I didn’t want to lose my job either.

“Matt is here, you going to be okay?” Stella asked squeezing my shoulders.

“yeah I’ll be fine, Jensen should be here any minute.” I said placing a hand on top of hers.

Stella gave me a smile before walking off. I quickly gathered my things shoving them in my bag.

I didn’t want to be left alone with Gray, something about being alone with him made me feel nauseous.

I hurried to the door. As I rushed out, I almost ran in to a young woman standing in front of the office.

“I’m sorry.” I immediately apologized offering her a smile.

“(y/n)?”

“uh yeah do I know you?” I asked looking at the girl.

she had a sad distant look in her eyes.

“no, you don’t.” she said quickly shaking her head.

I was about to respond when I heard Gray calling my name. I glanced back towards the building to see him coming my way. I turned my head back to where the girl had just stood but she was gone.

where did she go?

how did she know my name?

I guess a lot of people knew my name now that the press leaked my information, it made a chill run down my spine.

“everything okay?” Gray asked as he got closer.

“yeah, there was just a girl.” I said staring at where the mysterious woman could’ve gone.

“did you find a room yet?” He asked completely ignoring what I just said.

“uh no not yet.” I said nervously.

Gray was about to respond when Jensen pulled up in his bright red ferrari. He opened the door sending a warning glare towards Gray.

“I should go.” I said not wanting there to be another confrontation.

“yeah, wouldn’t want to keep your billionaire boyfriend waiting.” Gray seethed before walking back in to the office.

Jensen got out, opening the passenger door so I could slip in.

“what was that about?” Jensen asked.

I could see the jealousy rolling off of him in waves.

“uh I have to go to New York this weekend.” I murmured.

“with him?”

“for work.”

“absolutely not.” Jensen growled gripping the wheel tightly.

“Jensen, if this relationship is going to work, you can’t control me.”

“I’m not trying to control you, I just don’t want you to go to New York with him.” Jensen said looking at me sincerely.

“Jensen it’s a work trip.”

“to you, it may be a little more to him. if you want to go to New York, I’ll take you there myself. just please don’t go with him.” He pleaded.

I sighed looking at his face. He looked really uneasy.

“okay.” I agreed.

Relief flooded his features, I can’t deny feeling a bit of relief myself.

“good, I hate it when we fight.” He said starting up the car and taking off towards my apartment.

“that wasn’t a fight, that was called a conversation with compromise.” I laughed grabbing his hand.

It was quiet the rest of the way to my apartment. I opened the door throwing my bag down on the sofa.

“so what are we making?” Jensen asked taking off his jacket.

“fajitas, want to start cutting the peppers?” I asked handing him a knife and the bell peppers.

“uh sure.”

“you do know how to cut peppers don’t you?” I joked

“I’m not completely helpless.” Jensen said

I laughed as he started to dice the bell peppers. I got out the steak, starting to prepare it.

“excuse me sir.” I said leaning over him to grab the seasoning.

Jensen growled as my breasts brushed over his arm. I smirked returning to the steak.

“pardon me.” I smirked reaching around him to grab the onions.

I made sure to drop my hand lower, rubbing it against his toned abs and down towards his crotch area. I could hear his breathing quicken.

“sorry, my hand slipped.” I said innocently.

Jensen chuckled before returning to dicing the peppers.

“one more thing.” I said leaning over.

Jensen was quick to catch my hands, pinning my body against the counter with his.

“you’re asking for trouble.” Jensen said licking his lips.

“I have no idea what you’re referring too.” I teased.

Jensen leaned down, his lips brushing against my neck.

“we’re supposed to be taking it slow.” I whispered, cocking my head to the side so he had better access.

“okay.” Jensen shrugged pulling away and returning to his peppers.

I sucked in a sharp breath as I watched him work. He smirked as I stared at him.

Fuck.

I didn’t realize how much I missed the feeling of being with him.

“you know what fuck slow.”

Author Note:

I must love you guys a lot because I wrote this entirely on my phone (which I hate doing) butttt I wanted to get something out to you! I return tomorrow! So sorry this was so short/suckish and I left you with ANOTHER cliffhanger! I hope you’ll return for more!

xoxoxo

Liv

Part (X)

[samanddean76]

A Fistful Of Sammy's

An ancient grimoire has been searching for the man that is destined to wield it for the good of all.  With the power that was imbued upon it, Lux gained sentience and hid herself away, appearing as nothing more than a smoothly polished rock.  Now she waits.  The problem?  The Stanford-Era Sam Winchester that the grimoire meets is not the only Sam searching for it.  And thanks to a little time travel the list of those seeking her is growing longer by the minute.  Once Soulless Sam and Demon Dean are added into the mix?  Things start to go sideways.  But then a couple of Hollywood actors trapped in Canada, who happen to look just like them and know everything about them, turn out to be crucial to Sam and Dean being able to save the day. 

Will an Apocalypse World Bobby (no, not that one) and a battle ravaged Castiel help or hinder?  Will the all-too helpful Gabriel guide Sam to the truth, or lead him astray?  And will Sam ever get the happy ending he so desperately deserves? 

Come along on a wild ride, with Metallica as the soundtrack, and an ending that hinges on one impossible choice.

Fandoms: Supernatural and Supernatural RPF

Rated: Explicit | Word Count: 33.6K (and climbing)

This is what happens when you have four Sam's, four Dean's, two Castiel's, two Jared and Jensen's, one Gabriel, one John, and one Jack in the same story.

Pairings: Dean Winchester/Sam Winchester, Jensen Ackles/Jared Padalecki, Demon Dean/Soulless Sam, Sam Winchester/Sam Winchester, Dean Winchester/Dean Winchester, Gabriel/Sam Winchester, Castiel/Dean Winchester, Castiel/Dean Winchester/Sam Winchester, John Winchester/Sam Winchester

Major Warnings: Rape/Non-Con

Additional Tags: AU, Time Travel, Will Reference Events From All Seasons Plus Prior To Series, Jared & Jensen from Season 6 - The French Mistake, Stanford Era Sam, Dean, & John, Soulless Sam, Demon Dean, Rape/Non-Con Elements, Dubious Consent, Non-Graphic Violence, Unorthodox Demon Healing, Angst, Hurt/Comfort, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Sam & Dean Being The Best Of Brothers, Castiel Gets A Power Up, Sam Gets A Power Up, An OC For The Ages, Literally

Chapter One | Two | Three | Four | Five | Six | Seven | Eight on AO3

Hey! How about we turn it into The Samstraveganza Verse? Mmmm, okay, I'm sold.

Tell Me Something I Don't Know - Soulless Sam/Demon Dean one-shot on AO3

Excerpt from Chapter Six under the break....

Sam could see himself through Dean’s eyes.  From the moment he was the baby lying in the maternity ward.  Later when he played in his crib in the nursery of his only real home.  How scared Dean felt as he raced out the front door with his little Sammy held tight.  Through more dingy motel rooms and abandoned houses than either of them ever wanted to think about.  On the first day of middle school, when Sam had been so scared, Dean had looked down at him with pride, assuring his kid brother that he was going to be better than any of his classmates.  Helping Sam to get ready for his first dance, pinning on the boutonniere that he had stolen from the flower shop.  Wishing how it would have been him to escort his Sammy. 

“I would have danced with you, at least once.  Spun my big brother around the floor.”  The words echoed across his mind, and when Dean tried to deepen the kiss that they were sharing, Sam knew that he’d heard it, and shared the sentiment.  He thrust harder into the willing flesh before him, finding untold joy as each thrust was matched by Dean pushing back with his own hips.  Trying to help Sam sink in even deeper. 

[winchesterwild78]

The Director

Characters: Jensen Ackles x Reader (wife)

Warnings: None. This is a fluff piece.

A/N: Got inspired by a series of pictures  @jackles010378 posted. Just a quick story about a day on set with Director Jensen. This is a work of fiction and does not depict real life. No disrespect to Jensen or his family. All work is my own, do not take it or copy it without permission. Wrote this fast and edited it fast, please overlook any errors. 

Minors DNI 18+

Jensen loved being an actor, but he also loved directing. He had a great eye that lended to amazing shots and takes. He was thrilled when he was approached to direct some episodes of his latest project. 

“Hey Y/N, how’s things going at home? How are the kids?” You heard your husband’s husky voice ask on the other end of the phone. “Hey babe, we’re good. They are outside playing and I’m fixing some lunch. Is everything okay? You sound off.” 

Jensen let out a long sigh, “Yeah, they asked me to direct the next few episodes.” “Oh Jens, that’s great! Why don’t you sound more excited?” “I don’t know. I guess I’m just nervous. It’s a lot of responsibility and I don’t want to screw it up.” “Jensen, you’re amazing at what you do. You always give all of yourself to anything you do. It doesn’t matter if it’s work, family or friends. You put all of yourself into everything. That’s one of the things I love about you. Jens, honey, you can do this.” 

“Thank you baby, I just needed to hear your voice. I love you.” “I love you too, Jensen, now, go do your thing baby.” You hung up and felt a pang of guilt. Jensen always put too much pressure on himself and you knew being by his side would help calm him. 

You grabbed your phone and called Gen. “Hey Gen, I have a huge favor to ask. Can you watch the kids for me? Jensen has been asked to direct and I’m afraid he’s spiraling.” “Sure, Y/N. Bring them over. We can all hang out and they can have a sleepover.” “Thanks, Gen! You’re the best.” 

You ran upstairs and packed yourself, and the kids. You took the kids to Gen and Jared’s and thanked her again. Then you headed for the shooting location. You were thankful this latest project was local enough so you could drive to set. 

You called Clif so he could meet you at security and get you inside without issue. You arrived and made it through security without any problem. “So, Clif. How is our boy doing? Honestly.” “Well, he’s stressed and of course he’s trying to make sure everything is perfect. You know how he hates to let people down.” “I know, thanks for getting me through security.” Clif hugged you and led you to the set. 

You saw Jensen behind the camera and he called cut as soon as you stepped in. He hadn’t seen you, and he was giving directions to the actors. You could see he was getting frustrated and he was trying to contain it. He called action and you watched as he moved around the set with the camera to get the perfect shot. 

One of the actors tripped and fell, so Jensen called cut again. The actor immediately started apologizing and Jensen put a hand on his shoulder. “It’s okay, it happens. Are you hurt? Do you need a break?” The actor shook his head and told Jensen no. The actor looked no more than 20 so you knew he was new. Jensen was always so kind and understanding with mishaps on the set. Afterall, he and Jared did plenty to drive their directors crazy. 

Jensen saw what time it was and he cut for lunch. He was frustrated. As the room cleared out you saw him sit down, take off his hat and run his fingers up and through his hair. He let out a frustrated sigh. Seeing him like that always broke your heart.

You walked up behind him, his head still down and hands in his hair and you put your arms around him. “Hey there Mr. Director. You look like you could use a break.” You kissed his cheek. Jensen’s head went up and his big green eyes looked at you with excitement and love. “Hey baby, what are you doing here?” He stood and threw his arms around you and softly kissed your lips. “I had Gen watch the kids, and I came to see if I could help with my husband’s stress.” 

He sat back down and pulled you between his legs. Cupping your face he kissed you again, this time it was more passionate. “Come on baby, let’s get you to your trailer so you can eat some lunch and relax. I’ll rub your shoulders.”

The two of you walked back to his trailer, hand in hand and he wore a mischievous smirk. Once in his trailer he plopped down on the sofa and pulled you with him. He peppered kisses all over you and had you giggling. “I love hearing your laugh, darlin’. It’s one of my favorite things to hear.” You smiled at him, “I love when you make me laugh. Now, let’s get you some lunch. What do you want and I’ll make it or go get it.” 

“I’d rather just take you to the bedroom.” He wiggled his eyebrows at you. “Jensen Ross Ackles!” You laughed. He stood up and grabbed you around your waist, “Y/N Y/M/N Ackles. I can’t help it. I'm in love with my wife and can’t wait to please her.” You giggled, “Fine, but you promise you’ll eat after.” “Darlin’ I plan on eating during.” He winked at you and you blushed. 

“Yes, I’ll grab something later.” You took his hand and led him back to the bedroom of his trailer. Clothes were shed and you helped Jensen relax and release all his built up stress. A few times actually.

By the time you two were finished he had about 15 minutes before he had to return to set. “Jens, you need to get dressed and back to set soon.” He pulled you closer to him and groaned, “Do I have to. I’d rather just lay here in your arms for the rest of the day.” “Me too, but you have a job to do. I’ll be here with you tonight. I have a bag packed and Gen is watching the kids.” His smile grew big, “That’s great. I will get you all to myself tonight.” You shook your head, “Now, go finish the shoot for the day.” 

You both got dressed and Jensen grabbed a quick bite from craft services. He pulled a chair up for you to sit next to him while he finished shooting for the day. You loved watching him work, and sitting next to him helped calm him. The rest of the shoot went smoothly. By the time Jensen called cut for the day, everyone was exhausted. 

Jensen took you by the hand and led you out of the set and towards his trailer. Once inside he pulled you close to him, “Thank you for coming to set today. I love you so much.” “You’re welcome baby. I love you too, Mr. Director.” 

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