#i can not BELIEVE it's been a year wth

[twod6]

still think abt the fact that elite is one of my oldest and most developed ocs and she literally exists bc of a love live au that maybe two people would have known about (I know kei was one of them but by god they definitely don’t remember - it wasn’t anything that got more than like a brief off mention) . and also Dorian wouldn’t exist if kei hasn’t suggested she had a wolf companion that one time. and n she’s like. archetypical

[yourfavoriteirishcherokee]

It's my 12 year anniversary on Tumblr 🥳

[ashwhowrites]

Can you do an Older! Eddie x reader, where they're neighbors, and they tend to be flirty with each other, and one night, they go out and drink like, A LOT, and it ends up with reader calling Eddie "Daddy" and Eddie's like WTH did she just said? But reader doesn't remembers any of that, and after some weeks Eddie decides to go out to another bar with reader again, and Eddie kinda hints what happened last time they went out together, and Eddie ends up revealing what she had said to him and reader' s a blushing mess and panics and starts apologizing but Eddie reassures her (maybe Eddie likes being called daddy?)

I had a lot of fun with this. I hope this is what you wanted and you enjoy it. Thank you for requesting 🫶🏻

Daddy

Y/N moved to Hawkins a year ago, she ran from her family and needed to start over. She bought a small home, with a green yard and a good neighborhood. She was friendly and made sure to introduce herself around the block.

She connected with her neighbor, Eddie. He was a gorgeous man, toned, musical, and extremely charming. He had a smile that made her knees buckle and a voice that sent shivers up her spine. Over the months, she found herself flirting with him shamelessly, and happy to see he flirted right back.

She didn't make any moves, she was unsure of his life and if he had his own family. He was older and lived a much more life than she did. But she also couldn't ignore him. She felt a pull towards him.

He couldn't stay away from her either. Not that he tried. He's been married, divorced, and the whole thing. If he found her attractive, and if he felt happier than ever next to her. What's so wrong with that? He knew he was older and that put them at different points in life. But they met and connected. It was a sign of something he believed.

He had no shame in constantly going to her house or calling her to his. They hadn't done anything, and he craved to do a lot more than just talking. He wanted to taste her lips. He wanted her body against his as she cried out. But he also wanted to wake up next to her, go on dates, and show everyone she belonged with him. Something was going on between them but neither had the balls to make it go further.

Until Y/N got a little too drunk.

~~~

Going out to the bar was a common thing they did together. There was a small bar just a few miles from their house, perfect for a drunk walk home.

Y/N drank a bit more than she usually did, and Eddie wasn't going to let her get drunk alone. Both slamming drinks and laughing loudly. Eddie was craving a cigarette but refused to leave her by herself. He didn't speak, just gently grabbed her hand, wrapped her fingers around his pants chain, and led her outside as he tugged for his pack and lighter. She blindly followed, she'd let Eddie bring her anywhere he wanted.

Once outside, she kept her fingers on his chain, loving the way she felt connected to him.

"Want one?" He offered, but she shook her head. She much rather watch him smoke than taste the tobacco off his tongue.

~~

On their walk home, she kept her fingers on his chain, this time dragging him along. She swayed and almost tripped a few times. His body caught her before she hit the ground.

They stumbled into her house, and he led her to the bedroom. Her drunk mind noticed how horny she felt. Her hands were on his chest as she walked him to her bed.

"Whatcha doing there?" He teased, his feet hitting the bed as he fell back. She giggled as she fell on top of him.

"Just wanna have a little fun, daddy." She whispered, her lips on his neck.

He wasn't sure if he heard her right. His thoughts out the window as her mouth sucked on his neck. Her hands felt amazing and her mouth had him breathless. He could feel his bulge growing in his jeans. He wanted to hear her say it again.

"Trust me, I want this too but maybe we should try it sober?" He asked, gently pushing her to his side.

She pouted but nodded. He was right but she was too drunk to know what was happening.

~~~

A few weeks passed, and she hasn't brought up what happened. Eddie figured she didn't remember anything so he didn't want to embarrass her and bring it up. But it hasn't left his head.

They were back out at a bar and Eddie tried to stay focused on the conversation but Y/N could see his head was everywhere else. Both ordered water and stayed sober for the night.

"Something on your mind, handsome?" She teased, sipping her drink as she watched his eyes blink himself back into reality.

"Sorry, sorry. Just, I'm fine. You were saying?" He tried to shake it off. But her eyes were piercing through him. And that hint of lust was there, the same look when the word left her lips.

"Are you seeing someone or something? You won't even look at me." She said, a hint of sadness in her voice. It made her stomach turn to think about him falling for someone else.

"No! That's not it. It's just, do you remember what happened last time we went out?" He asked. She shook her head no.

"Why?"

"Something kinda happened and I can't stop thinking about it." He admitted, his jeans felt tight as he thought about it and as her hand slipped on his thigh.

"Tell me," she encouraged with a smile.

"Well you pushed me on your bed and kissed on my neck..." he started, praying it would connect in her head.

"Oh my God." She whined, removing her hand immediately. "I'm so sorry I practically harassed you! Shit, I can't believe I did that."

"You don't have to apologize, I liked it." He said with a smirk, she couldn't help but feel her thighs clench.

"Really? I didn't make a total fool of myself by throwing myself at you?"

"I told you that I'd like to do it sober." He said, a smile on her face as she bit her lip. He took it as a green light to move closer. His face inches away from hers. Her hand was back on his knee as their bodies melted into each other.

"I'd like to do it sober too."

"Do you remember what you called me? When you were dry-humping my leg and sucking on my neck?" He teased, his hot breath hitting her mouth. She almost felt like she was going to drool. She wanted to yank off his clothes and take him right there.

"No, what did I say?" She teased back.

Eddie smirked and began to quietly moan and whimper. "oh daddy, you feel so big. Oh, Daddy fuck my dirty pus-"

"WHAT?" Y/N screamed in horror. Her face was immediately in her hands as she shoved her face against the sticky bar counter. "I can't ever look at you again"

"Baby, I'm kidding! I'm kidding." Eddie laughed, his hand squeezing her knee. "You didn't say that." He reassured her, and her hot blushed face appeared out of her hands.

"If I did, I think I might die." She whined.

"You did call me Daddy though," Eddie smirked, again laughing as she dove her face into her hands.

"I'm so sorry. This is so embarrassing." Her voice mumbled as she spoke to the counter instead of him.

"It's okay and don't feel embarrassed." He said, then his voice got low, and his mouth was right next to her ear. His breath tickled the skin and she felt goosebumps cover her body. "Daddy liked it." She tried to ignore the ache she felt between her thighs.

"You did?" She mumbled into her hands. Still refusing to look up.

"Look at Daddy when he's talking to you." He said in a demanding tone. Her body followed his words before her brain knew what he said. Her face was inches from his as she looked into his eyes. His hand reached out and grasped hers. Gently placing it on his growing erection. She whimpered as she felt how big he was under her hand.

"I did." He said, a quiet moan leaving his throat when she added pressure and pushed down.

"Maybe I should help?" She asked, standing up as she removed her hand from his lap. She held out her hand and nodded her head towards the small bathroom.

"Damn, I wished you called me that sooner." He said as he grabbed her hand.

Tags!

@bmunson86 @mxcheese @ladymunson @michaelfuckinglangdon @z0mbie-blah @biittersweet @mirrorsstuff @somethingvicked @micheledawn1975 @ago-godance @magnificantmermaid @tlclick73 @hargrovesswifee @cityofidek @manyfandomsfanvergentreblogs @silky-luxe @lokiofasgard616 @loving-and-dreaming @eddiemunsonsbitch69 @thegemaqua @ashlynnkennedy @strangerthingsstories5255 @harringt8ns @pleasinghellfire @whoscamila @stusdollface93 @gretavankleep37 @bellaisswagger

[whateverisbeautiful]

♥️Reveling in Richonne - TOWL

#49: The Final Deal (1.05)

gif cred: @nerd4music

Over the years, Jadis has made several deals with Rick and pretty much every single time she screwed him over. 😪 And unsurprisingly, Jadis tries to screw Rick and Michonne over again as she and Richonne attempt to make more deals in the following TOWL scene. However, this time around will be the final deal. Finally. 🙌🏽...

Richonne enter a Yellowstone National Park museum and it’s fitting for Jadis' final moments to take place in this sorta artsy location.

gif cred: @nerd4music

As Rick and Michonne quietly hunt Jadis down they come across that bumbling trio from earlier and once again they easily disarm them. And then walkers come and take the trio out which…how those three survived this long I’ll never know lol.

So then a shootout ensues with Jadis. And it’s sweet seeing Rick and Michonne hold onto each other as they run away. 

gif cred: @coolpartytimefan

As Rick and Michonne stoop behind some fabric, I adore the quick little moment of Michonne checking on Rick with one hand on his face and one on his thigh. Her baby for real. 🥲

cred: @ririchonne

Jadis is again yapping about living and dying for the cause and calling Rick a traitor and then when Rick pokes his head out she straight up aims for the head and grazes him with her shot. 😑Knowing how fatal that shot could have been to Rick, Jadis’ needed to be sent to the afterlife immediately. Like...

Michonne says Rick’s name with concern as they switch places and he assures that he’s alright. And proving yet again that Jadis oddly might belong in the Top 5 Richonne Believers, she says, “You two together, you are unstoppable.”

Then she gets way too personal when she says, “But that won’t save your kids. You kill me, they’re dead. I die by my wounds, they’re dead.” And she’s feeling extra bold as she steps out of hiding and says, “I get killed by walkers, they’re dead.”

What Jadis fails to see is that having the audacity to threaten Michonne and Rick’s kids in front of them like this guarantees she’s dead. Like Jadis, hon...

You can tell Michonne is seeing red as she steps out with her gun aimed at Jadis. Understandably, because now Jadis is triggering Michonne as a mother.

Rick calls Michonne's name but Michonne is ready to end this lady once and for all as she debates pulling the trigger. Jadis almost looks like she’s beckoning her to do it, but knowing they actually do need some info out of Jadis first, Michonne instead kills the walkers coming from behind Jadis.

When Michonne runs out of bullets, Jadis starts shooting and they both flee for cover. Jadis tries to dish out more of that CRM culty propaganda when she says, “It didn’t have to be this way. You were on the path, Rick. After all these years, you were finally feeling the responsibility to fight for something bigger than yourself.”

Wth, Jadis? 😑 Hearing that I was like - truly girl, shut up because what do you mean he finally felt a responsibility to fight for something bigger than himself?? As if Jadis didn’t meet Rick in the process of him fighting a whole war to free oppressed communities. 🙃 She's an absolute clown. 🤡

Rick makes his way over to Michonne as Jadis tells Rick that “Beale saw it too. He was gonna give you the Echelon briefing the moment you returned.” Yeah well, Consignee Bethune had other plans lol. 😋🚁🌊

And then I always really like this wordless exchange between Rick and Michonne. Because as Jadis claims that Rick’s eyes would have been opened by the briefing, Michonne looks at him and then he looks up at her and the ways it’s filmed you can just tell that there is nothing the CRM could say or open his eyes too that would make him not choose Michonne every single time. 

gif cred: @andy-clutterbuck

Jadis says Rick could have secured Alexandria’s security but he didn’t. Then she tries to make Michonne an issue by saying, “You let Michonne pull you away from that.” If only Jadis knew how true that was considering Michonne literally pulled them out of a helicopter to get away from this army. 🤭

Then Jadis wants to start coming at Michonne directly saying all she had to do was leave when Rick arranged for her escape and since she didn’t Jadis declares that now the fates of their friends and their children are sealed. Ok, Little Miss Villain...

Rick tries to again appeal to Jadis’ heart, if she has one, by saying she doesn’t really want to kill everyone back home. He calls her Anne again and he’s onto something regarding the name Anne getting Jadis riled up cuz she sounds particularly irritated as she doubles down on the CRM perspective that, “It’s not about want. It’s about keeping your humanity or saving humanity. And it is a choice.”

In a way, that is the very thing TOWL explored with Rick’s journey. He thought he had to just die and save humanity but through Michonne he regained his humanity and the belief that they can both keep their humanity and save humanity, it doesn’t have to be either/or.

Jadis says she’s chosen her community and her life and then questions if it’ll be them that dies today or her and everyone back home. And the way Michonne got a good swing at Jadis with RJ’s ax, it’s looking like Jadis is going to be the one meeting her demise. Her time is clearly almost up.

So playing pretend one more time, Michonne says, “She’s right, Rick.”  And then Rick and Michonne demonstrate yet again that verbal communication is just a thing they do for fun because they are entirely capable of conversing and making entire plans just by looking at each other.

As they look in each others eyes they immediately know to try and pull a con on the original scammer herself. Also I just realized this is Michonne once again choosing to just not even address Jadis and speak only to Rick.

Michonne says, “I didn’t want to see it. I wanted her dead so I didn’t have to see it. But Rick, there has to be a sacrifice. Since I found you, all that I’ve done has been for us. But now I see, this can’t end with us going home.”

Jadis asks what’s it gonna be and then Rick says, “Okay,” pretending to agree that he’ll stay with the CRM if Jadis doesn’t threaten Michonne or their home. 

Michonne says, “There’s still a deal to me made, one where we all can live and Alexandria.” And hearing yet another deal even be attempted to be made with Judas was just...

Fortunately, it’s a fake deal and the final deal with this snake.

Rick says Michonne will get supplies that’ll help Jadis stay alive long enough to get to the jump point and then Rick will go back with Jadis. The shot of Michonne looking at Rick as he says this. 🥲 It just truly feels like she’s looking at the love of her life. 🥹

Rick looks in Michonne’s eyes as he tells Jadis that they can say he was the lone survivor of the helicopter crash and he’ll go back to the CRM to work for a future like none of this ever happened.

He says they’ll do this on one condition and Jadis already knows when she says, “Michonne gets away and I never tell them about Alexandria.” Rick says, “It’s the only way this works” and then I love his subtle wink at Michonne when he asks, “We got a deal?” 

Jadis wonders why she should trust Rick after all the stuff he’s pulled but that had me like why should you trust him???? Pretty ironic coming from literally the longest-running scammer in the franchise. 😑

gif cred: @nerd4music

Rick understandably isn’t interested in convincing Jadis why he can be trusted so he just asks, “We got a deal or not?” Jadis isn’t doing so hot from the blood loss so she agrees and says, “Yeah. We got a deal.”

Then, y’all I adore seeing the small detail of Rick and Michonne holding hands. 😭 I love that they were holding hands during this deal, wanting each other to know that regardless of what they’re saying to Jadis right now they’re still entirely in this together.

And I also love that Rick doesn't let go of Michonne’s hand until the very last second as she stands up to come out of hiding and “go get supplies.” 🧲 TOWL said every Richonne scene is gonna have a dash of romance and I’m beyond here for it. 🥰

So Michonne tosses her weapon and exits and I love that she puts a little feisty emphasis on the weapon toss when she looks at Jadis. And then Rick disarms and shows himself as Jadis tells him to come closer.

Jadis lays down her weapons and Rick of course takes one more opportunity to let Petty Rick shine as he looks at Jadis on death's door and says, “You’ve looked better.” When I tell you I love this extra man lol. 😋 I know he’s appreciating the number his wife did on this garbage woman. And whenever Rick’s eyebrows go up like that, just know some shade is bound to follow. 🤭

gif cred: @nerd4music

Jadis again expresses acknowledgement of the power of Richonne when she says, “I was a fool to think I could take you down, with you two together.” Jadis never got much right in life, but she did have a solid grasp on the fact that Rick and Michonne really do make each other stronger and they're hard to beat together. She explains that’s why she agreed to the deal so she could keep Rick and Michonne separate.

And then to the *utter shock* of everyone, Jadis whips out Red’s red gun and attempts to double cross them for the fifty-'leventh time. 🙄But I love how Rick responds unfazed to her ploy like he thinks it’s the most predictable thing ever. 🥱 A serpent gon’ do what a serpent gon’ do, so I'm sure seeing her aim the gun just had Rick like...

Jadis says she doesn’t trust Rick but she respects him. And then Michonne shows up with a weapon pointed at Jadis and tells her to drop the gun or she’ll kill her.

Then, those noodle-less walkers come and bite a chunk out of Jadis' neck. And getting fatally bit instantly spurs Jadis' come-to-Jesus.

gif cred: @perryabbott

Jadis goes into a monologue about the many lives she tried to balance with her back and forth between Jadis and Anne and the CRM and the Alexandrians. And Richonne is nice enough to listen to her last words.

As she realizes Father Gabriel already showed her the answers she needed (realized too late imo 🙃), Jadis reveals where her dossier is hidden and tells them to just destroy it and go home.

She still believes in the CRM and that they’ll bring the world back, so she looks at Michonne and Rick and says, “Tell me you won’t come after them.” And then y’all, Michonne says request denied because she doesn’t give a damn if this is Jadis' dying wish, they’re gonna do what needs to be done. 👌🏽

Michonne replies, “No. Because we are coming for them.” And the way Rick looks, it appears like this development is news to him lol. But I love that Michonne wants Jadis to know this just before she goes.

Michonne continues, “We’re gonna get the dossier. And then the CRM - we’re gonna stop them.” She looks over at Rick as she continues to inform both Rick and Jadis of what comes next when she says, “He’s gonna get the Echelon briefing and find out everything that they do that the city doesn’t know about. The city I saw won’t stand for what they are. And we’re gonna help the city stop them.”

And y’all, the way Jadis is staring at Michonne...I know she’s thinking ‘and this is why I wrote a whole chapter on Rick's wife in my dossier.’ #DirectQuoteFromJadis'Mind. 🤭 Had her like...

Then knowing how much Jadis loves being called Anne, Michonne calmly says, “Because, Anne, the CRM is not the answer and they must end.” And, with the way Bowlcut believes in Richonne, you know Jadis knows they’re going to be successful at stopping the CRM.

Jadis really had to die knowing she and the very mission she dedicated her life to are about to take some serious Ls. 😬

Michonne then turns to Rick and says, “We’re gonna do that.” See, Michonne has been through a whole lot of life and so she’s standing here now knowing the CRM can be taken down just like all the rest.

And always a great and supportive husband, Rick is on board with this plan as he looks from Michonne over to Jadis and says, “You kept us alive for a reason.” And I love the way Rick subtly smiles at her, knowing Jadis is getting yet another front-row seat to the power of Richonne. 

So Jadis,...

Hearing this seems to have Jadis realizing she made some bad life choices and should have just stuck to her artsy lane when she says, “I wish I died an artist.” I always really like that line. Something about it is poetic and pretty in a tragic way.

But also, whenever I hear it I’m like girl, don’t worry you did die an artist...

Jadis reflects on how her life as an artist wasn’t about survival but about truth. She says this is the end of her story and her peace and then it becomes crystal clear a Richonne proposal moment is coming when Jadis removes the wedding ring and holds it out.

As she holds the ring, she tells Rick, “On the bridge, you told Gabriel you wanted to marry her.” And I love that this gets brought up again and that Michonne gets to learn that Rick was planning to marry her officially before he was taken.

The way Jadis looks over to Michonne when she says this always makes me smile because she looks quite happy to let Michonne know, 'yes girl, your man was trying to...

Jadis puts the ring in Rick’s hand and says, “He found this, and he wanted to give it to you.” Rick is shook by this and asks, “How did you...?” And I feel like with the way Rick so clearly had proposing on his mind during this road trip home I’m sure that has him even more bewildered of how Jadis knew this.

Jadis just smiles and shakes her head which had me like - hold up up up cuz no we’re nawt just shrugging off this detail of how she got the ring and was in contact with Father Gabriel. I needed her to tell them about her tea times with Gabriel because Richonne needs to interrogate that man when they get home lol. 🙃

Jadis tells Rick he wasn’t dreaming about killing her and then says, “Go ahead. Do what you said you would do. Please.” Michonne and Rick stand up and the time arrives for Rick to finally take Jadis out for good.

Jadis dies and it’s a somber vibe as Rick just quietly walks away and Michonne follows. After playing in Richonne’s face from season 7 forward, stealing years from them, and putting their children in danger, I felt it was only right for her to go. Even overdue. And while that monologue didn’t at all redeem her in my eyes, it was well-performed by McIntosh and had some heart.

gif cred: @nerd4music

I’m most glad that she gave Rick that ring tho because it leads to the best scene of the episode. 🤩

One of the earliest ways that trifling Jadis tried Richonne was in the season 7 finale when she said she was gonna lay with Rick and asked Michonne if she cared. 🙃 Y’all remember when she looked Rick up and down, turned to Michonne, and asked, “Yours?”

Well...about that.😊

I always find it to be poetically fitting that here in Jadis’ final episode, it’s also the very episode where Rick and Michonne affirm that Jadis' "Yours?" question actually isn’t that crazy because Rick and Michonne really do happily belong to each other.

He’s hers. She’s his. 🥲

So you know I gotta break down the absolutely beautiful scene that makes that sentiment crystal clear. 😌👌🏽💍

[9settersoul]

little things about the haikyuu boys that I love

characters: oikawa, akaashi, tsukishima, bokuto, hinata, kageyama, iwaizumi, kuroo, tanaka

warning: timeskip spoilers!!!

⋆ ★ ⋆

oikawa tooru:

hums when he walks

hums or sings when doing ABSOLUTELY anything

skips when he walks

always posing for photos

always somehow blocks iwaizumi in photos

takes selfies and pictures of the sunset

stays up late to watch volleyball

takes his nephew to practices

when he found out he wasn't in monthly volleyball he laid on the ground and used a volleyball as a pillow

his mentions of his and iwaizumi's "unbreakable bond of trust"

his post timeskip current concern was: he is mistaken as a minor

when the crowd goes "OLE!!" when he serves

how he strategies and finds people's weaknesses

his "worthless pride"

how he carried out his dream and followed his idol to argentina

calls kageyama "tobio-chan"

most likely learned spanish to live in argentina

literally the most well-rounded character in the entire thing

HIS CHARACTER DEVEOPLEMET!!!

akaashi keiji:

fiddles with his fingers

constant analyzing and overthinking (he's so real)

only second-year who is a vice-captain

the smartest character (class 6!)

thick thighs

his witty humor

his patience with bokuto

is the captain of the team anxiety and depression (other members are yachi, asahi, and kiyru)

his eyes

very humble

his blunt personality

his ability to deal with bokuto in the most strategic way

he's so perfect...wow

tsukishima kei:

is popular with girls at school

works at a museum in timeskip

loves strawberry shortcake

fiddles with his fingers when he's nervous

his character development - from calling volleyball just a club and then finding his love for it then further pursuing it as a career

how sassy he is

standing with a hand on his hip

bokuto kouatro:

likes girls on the thicker side

his friendship with kuroo

is quite literally THICK

in timeskip, he doesn't know how to pay taxes

rewatches himself on tv

loves to show off

dropping down from being the top 3 aces to the top 5 was because of his simplemindedness and mood swings lol

his hair deflates when he's in emo mode

the name bokuto literally translates to horned owl

his long knee pads

his "disciple" hinata

BOKUTO BEAM!!

hinata shoyo:

timeskip; is considered one of the best receivers in Japan

his ability to make friends with anyone

when he talks for kageyama, knowing he's uncomfortable

his growth... his entire development wow

somehow creates a relationship with EVERY single setter he crosses paths with

ninja shoyo

his ability to flatter people

his homesickness in brazil... and then it went away when he saw oikawa

literally biked home UP A MOUNTAIN every day, wth

kageyama tobio:

literally the youngest first-year

he was 15 at the japan youth camp, turned 16 after that, and THEN went to nationals

takes care of his fingernails

has insane memory

prioritizes his nutrition

i firmly believe he learned everything from iwaizumi and oikawa

genuinely DISTURBED when atsumu called him a goody-two-shoes and I think that's so funny

is awkward with animals, cause he feels like they don't like him

literally been involved with volleyball since he was three

vice-captain when he's a third year

timeskip kageyama signs his name with a heart just like how suga said

verryyy respectful to his superiors

low key the heartthrob of karasuno but he's so oblivious

him embracing his title as the "king of the court"

iwaizumi hajime:

beats everyone in arm wrestles (massive biceps)

rolls his sleeves

loves godzilla

wears his school uniform messy

can play baseball

is a gemini

caught bugs as a kid

underrated king

definitely loyal and dependable

literally, the BEST friend to put your trust in! the way he slapped some sense into oikawa about how you always work as a team and never alone

is bad at taking pictures (mainly selfies) ---that one with ushijima...

was so proud when he showed oikawa the fish oikawa's named after

is NOT afraid to cry

the denial of his and oikawa's "unbreakable bond of trust"

kuroo testuro:

chemistry nerd

likes girls with long hair

likes the ocean

actually prefers dogs over cats

a genuinely kind person

his worry is he can't get rid of his bedhead - which happens because he sleeps on his stomach with two pillows pressing into his face

youngest of the third years on nekoma

his friendship with bokuto

his interactions with daichi

his support for tsuki and helping him grow into a great player

the way he stands always with his hand on his hip

he is INSANE at defense, not just blocking but digging too

how supportive he is of kenma and how he was the foundation for something kenma learned to love

i'm pretty sure it's canon that he lives with his grandma... so cute

TIMESKIPPPPPPP PLEASEE

tanaka ryuunosuke:

how supportive he is. LITERALLY A PILLAR OF SUPPORT GAH!!

canon - married kiyoko

his mental toughness

most underrated character ever oml

such a good upperclassman :)

hype man!!

overcomes his anxiety mid-game

his obsession and overall respect toward kiyoko

his relationship with noya

the beanie!!

him and asahi have played every single match with no rest

[spacexseven]

Ngl god darling is better than darling with a god ability tbh

Also would nikolai try to kill god darling? And I wonder what dearest sigma would think, he's just so lovely

OH ALSO HAVE YOU SEEN THE NEW XIAO THING? It's been around for a while and idk if I asked you about it but he's so pretty wth

not sure what xiao thing you're talking about but he's always so pretty i want to squish him

cw: yandere themes, bad end for nikolai :<

even with your years of watching people, you had yet to see someone like nikolai.

despite his claims that his motives were perfectly clear and that you should be able to understand him perfectly, he always seemed, to you, like a puzzle missing its final piece. what was that piece for him? was it the morality he lacked? when you asked him that, though, he told you that he liked to think he was a puzzle with too many pieces—sentience when everyone else lived like puppets, desire greater than any other, and so on. how could you complete an anomalous puzzle, with no real final picture?

"tell me," he once asked, voice uncharacteristically somber, eyes gazing down at his blood-streaked hands, "can a human become a god?"

it occurred to you then that nikolai was only trying to run from something. something that made him human, something he hated. you think back to the times when he told you he wanted to be free, wanted to stop feeling. was that the extra piece he couldn't get rid of?

still, he was kind to you. or at least as kind as he could be, between jovial, teasing comments and moments of unfiltered rage. he called you his friend, but he said that about fyodor too, and a few nights ago he was trying to convince you to kill him.

"can a god die?" at your questioning look, he added, "can you?"

"i'm not sure. i haven't gotten that close yet," you admitted "but i suppose for a god, being forgotten is as close to death as they can get."

"i won't forget you," he smiled, but the gesture was far from reassuring when his eyes glimmered with something bright.

you wondered if you had unintentionally sparked something in him. you even considered the possibility that you'd wake up the next morning to find him with a knife at your throat. if he was determined to kill fyodor to achieve what he thought was pure freedom, who's to say you won't be next? knowing nikolai, it was easier to believe that he was a monster, a creature of pure evil, bloodthirsty, and seeking to haunt. but things were never that simple. there were times when your heart ached for him, wondering why he had to go down this path. and those times, you truly felt useless, wondering if you couldn't do anything even in your position.

now, you wonder, if it was your sympathy that made you weak.

"it's not fair. i won't forget you," nikolai sighs, "even if anyone else will. but you'll live on even if i'm not here and you'll forget me."

you wish to tell him that you won't, but in your current position, bleeding out at a rapid pace from numerous wounds and head spinning, you can barely handle the pain, let alone move your dry lips. you remember that nearby you is fyodor's body, cold and long dead. it was almost cruel how the closest you'd ever felt to being human was when you were dying.

"hey, but you're a god!" he must have thrown his hands up, from your memory of him, but nikolai's voice grows shriller, though you can't tell if it's from excitement or panic, "you'll come back, like that thing you mentioned before? reincarnation! and you have...powers..." you could tell instinctively that he was looking over at fyodor's corpse.

you want to tell him that you aren't sure. you've never been much use, even as a god. you've always liked being a human more. maybe you will come back, but likely not, and you definitely can't save fyodor anymore. you don't think anyone can. but the words escape you as your vision goes black. the only thing accompanying your dying body was a warm hand on your cheek and nikolai's incoherent mumbling.

sigma, admittedly, was your favorite. you saw a little bit of yourself in him and his desire to find his purpose. but most of all, you liked his determination, his unwavering resolve. it was nice to see how he ran the casino so perfectly, and you thought his position complemented him well.

but unlike nikolai who was easy to sling an arm around and drag out or fyodor, who was always ready to listen to any word that came out of your mouth, sigma was a little harder to get to. he was always working, cleaning up after the other two's messes, and keeping his customers happy. always on the go, and it was getting harder and harder to catch him. the only times he seemed to be able to listen to you was when you caught him staring out the balcony at the world below the casino, only accompanied by the moonlight. he was always gentler then, softer, but more solemn. it was during one of those nights that he finally asked you something.

"so, you're really a god?"

you awkwardly shuffle, "yes. i know fyodor is a bit too enthusiastic about it, but i really can't do much anyway. i'm more like...the remnant of what i used to be."

"is this how the world looks like to you?" he asks, looing at the tiny blinking lights below.

"it's...overwhelming. the world is so big and full of life, and i've never felt like i was a part of it. i love being around people more than anything, but i'm always reminded that i'll never be like them."

sigma stiffens up, still not meeting your gaze, "you're looking for it too, right? to feel like you have your own place here..."

and then, for the first time since you met him, he smiles, "at least we have each other." you smile back, not realizing he took it a little too seriously.

despite your differences, you were just like sigma—maybe that was why he liked you so much. sigma knew all his customers by heart, slaving away to memorize each face and the mannerisms behind it, their likes and dislikes, just to design an ideal experience for them here. all he ever had was the sky casino, and he was aware of just how easily it could be taken away from him. because of this, it wasn't anything unusual to see sigma meticulously studying each of his guests, observing them closely, and noting down his thoughts. maybe that's why you never suspected anything when he stared at you for far too long, something other than a sense of duty burning behind his eyes, something unlike his usual concerns dominating his mind. maybe that was why you didn't mind his new interest in you, stepping in to drag you away from nikolai and boldly insisting to fyodor that he needed to talk to you.

if only you had said something then, you wouldn't have to face this situation; sigma on his knees, pleading for you to stay, to not follow fyodor out of the casino again. you might stay away for weeks, he insisted, and it wouldn't be safe. all he had was you, so please, don't leave with him. and looking at the pain in sigma's eyes, you already knew it wouldn't end well if you didn't comply.

[salparadiselost]

How do the Mersupials see Clark? As a friend? As family? Something more complicated given their situation?

Hi!

So I think the mers solidly see Clark as “one of the pod” and essentially part of their family. I don’t remember where I talked about mer social structure, but I believe I’ve said that male Mers tend to raise their children communally.

In the wild, mer pods generally take three forms: male familial pods, female temporal pods, or male-female coupling pods. Male familial pods are the most common and often have the most individuals together. They are formed of multiple males with their pups and are multi-generational. Male pods are very strongly bonded and male Mers are often born into a pod which they do not leave their entire life. Females of the species are usually raised in male familial pods but almost always leave to go solo.

Occasionally females form pairs or small pods called female temporal pods, but they tend to be more fleeting or made for a purpose, such as hunting large prey. As the name suggests, these pods are temporary and rarely get above five individuals due to the aggressive nature of females. There have been many documented cases of female temporal pods ending due to in-fighting or even killing of other pod members, an instance that is exceedingly rare in male familial pods.

Male-female coupling pods form when an adult male and adult female live together in a lone couple. These tend to be a forced arrangement by the female onto the male. They can arise through circumstance such as a sister and brother hunting together, but most likely it is a forced arrangement where a male was seperated from a familial pod to breed with a female and care solely for her pups. It is not particularly uncommon and often is the reason why new pods forms, though the male is often extremely distressed by the arrangement and may try to return to a familial pod.

Males instinctively form pods because it provides an advantage in raising children and protection against females who could try to come in and kill pups to make room for their own or steal a mate from the pod. With multiple adults in a pod, males can spread the duties of childcare and are well-documented to frequently pass their pups into the pouches of related and unrelated males. This is also a strategy against infanticide by females as instantly frees up a pouch without the death of a pup or can confuse a female regarding their relatedness to a pup. Females do not kill their own children and they are much less likely to kill any pups at all if they are not sure what male is currently pouching their young. Pod members also provide protection against separation or the killing of pups as they can gang up on a lone female.

So, this is a long way to say that Bruce is basically hardwired to form pods, especially in stressful situations because pod = safety in the mer brain. This is only heightened when he has multiple pups and there’s more paternal pressure on him with his limited pouch space. Even though Clark is a different species, Bruce was raised by humans and sees them as equals so he wouldn’t hesitate to apply pod status to one. If anything, he’s probably really pissed that Clark never puts the pups in his pouch and Bruce has to do all the work, like wth Clark is supposed to be helping him out here.

Even though Clark has hurt them occasionally, Clark has basically lived with them for multiple years and there’s years of instances of Clark caring and helping raise the pups. The pups definitely see Clark as pod. He helped raise them. He’s protected them in many ways. They trust him completely even though he’s weird and funny looking. They see him as similar to Bruce though not as close as they recognise Bruce as their pouch parent. After all, Bruce was the one who pouched them when they hatched, nursed them and carried them when they were at their most fragile; he’s their ultimate parent, though that’s typical for mer social structures.

[maweallgotohell]

OKAY NO WAIT

I was reading fanfiction a few minutes ago, right? And it was about halloween costumes. Well, Cameron in halloween costumes.

AND DO YOU KNOW WHAT JUST RANDOMLY CAME TO MY MIND?!?!

okok y’all aren’t ready for this scenario-

Imagine it being Halloween and yn and Cam are going to go to a Halloween party of one of their friends. He knew what costume you’d choose, because you loved it so much, you couldn’t shut up about it. He, however, kept his costume choice a secret. You were lowkey scared he’d come up with something either incredibly scary, weird or stupid but it was

so.

much.

worse.

Or better, in your case.

After a few years of you and him being in a relationship, you randomly told him, that you had an immense crush on his character Jerome Valeska when you were 17. You were a few years younger than him. He was 30 now and you were 25. So when he was 22, you were 17, which was when they released the second season of Gotham. (This shit took all my math knowledge omfg)

You two laughed about it together. Cameron was a bit surprised that you randomly shared your teenage crushes with him, but he found it cute and funny.

So anyways.

It was the evening of the party and you already waited for him in the kitchen, already wearing your (fav costume) costume.

Cam‘s costume must’ve been very time-, skill- and effort-consuming, because he had called someone he once worked with, to help him with it. By the time you were really curious about his costume. Why did he make it such a secret?

You didn’t want to be late, so you knocked on the bathroom door and called:“ Cam, darling, are you ready soon? We’re gonna be late.“

„Yeah, yeah, just a sec, hun!“, he answered from the other side of the door, giggling like a little child.

What the hell was up with him? His costume must be really great.

You went back down the stairs and waited for him at the bottom of the staircase.

After a few minutes, you heard the bathroom door creak open upstairs and him giggling. As he came downstairs you turned around and-

You couldn’t believe your eyes.

Were you dreaming?

Wth was happening.

In front of you stood your boyfriend.

As Jerome mf Valeska.

You stopped breathing for a bit and felt like passing out any second. All those butterflies you felt for the character in your teens-

They were back.

„You like it?“, Cam smirked.

You just stared at him.

Then you just broke out into loud laughter.

„Wtf Cam HAHAHAH WHAT IS THIS“

You had to grab onto your thighs for support while wheezing and laughing.

„I thought, for this Halloween, I’d go as your teenage crush.“, he joined in on your laughter.

„I can’t take this Cam omfg. It’s so weird. I can’t take you seriously with this, you know that right?“

„Nah, I think you’re just even more in love with me right now.“, he grinned proudly.

„Yeah true.“

„Sooo“, he asked, a mischievous smirk on his face.

„ You still in love with lil ol‘ me?“, he asked in his deep Jerome voice.

Your face dropped.

„There is no way you can still do that.“, you said, blushing like mad.

He began laughing again.

„ Guess your crush on him is still there.“, he grinned.

„Yeah I guess the fictional crushes of teenage girls will never leave them.“, you said, a hand now over your mouth, still in shock.

„ Then let’s make little Yn‘s teenage dream come true and let her spend an evening with her bad boyfriend, Jerome Valeska.“, he grinned, placing an arm around your hip as he started guiding you towards the front door to leave.

„You know I’ll not be able to process this the whole evening, right?“, you asked, still a bit in shock.

„Yep.“, he grinned happily.

„Maybe my hot gf will be all over me even more the whole evening.“, he said, leaning down towards your ear, then whispering.

„ You look very hot btw hun. Gotta make sure to not let my feelings take over and take you home again just so I can have you all to myself, huh?“, he smirked.

You blushed. Yn exe literally stopped working.

You had literally the best boyfriend, Cameron Monaghan, who was also Jerome Valeska today..

Wtf.

„I love you so much Cameron, you know that?“

He smiled at you.

„ If you want you could even call me Jerome or J today.“, he smirked.

„But yeah, I know that. I love you too. And I love you more.“, he smiled proudly.

„But just don’t fall for Jerome more than for me, alright?“, he asked jokingly.

„No can do.“, you laughed at him as he poked your sides and started to tickle you as a response to your sassy answer.

—————

At the party, you two leaned on the bar waiting for your drinks. Well basically he leaned with his back against the bar and you leaned with your back against his hard chest, him having his arms around you. He put his head onto your shoulder and let out a sigh, making you shoot him a questioning look.

Then he raised his voice in the Jerome tone.

„It just feels good to be back.“

You giggled.

„Just don’t start killing people for real okay?“

„Why not? I wouldn’t harm you of course, doll. You’re the Bonnie to my Clyde.“, he murmured in your ear in that raspy voice.

You laughed.

„Hell yeah I am.“

You took his hand in yours and placed a soft kiss on its back.

„And nothing’s gonna change that.“, you added, now turning your head to the side and giving him a kiss on the cheek. He smiled, turned his head in your direction as well and kissed you on your lips, soft and gentle, the sfx make up on his lips feeling funny but also kinda real, which was astonishing.

As you pulled back, you examined every inch of his scarred face. Then you absentmindedly traced the scar where his face was „sewn on again“.

This was literally the most romntic thing Cam could’ve ever done for you and you didn’t even think about it earlier. That he could dress as Jerome.

There was a moment of silence as you two looked at each other.

„ I love you.“, you said. It was the most genuine and honest tone of yours.

„ Just please don’t get stabbed in the neck again or fall off a building. I can’t handle that shit again 8 years later. Hurt bad enough at 17.“, you smirked, rolling your eyes.

He chuckled.

„ I promise.“, he said in a playful way, but then his expression turned serious.

„I could never leave you YN, really. I love you.“

——————-

You two had an amazing evening.

BROOO IMAGINE-

Guys it’s 4:22 am and I’m sick so I really don’t give a fuck about any mistakes in this. That’s also why there aren’t any cute symbols or pictures for the aesthetic, I’m literally writing this on my phone rn. So I’ll fix that and correct them later, okay?

Thanks

Love ya <3

Bye

[sparklingcid3r]

wow ur last hc was a full meal like that was poetry!! urrrr mind!!!

wut do u think it was like for darry having tg back to the high school for the first time? maybe to pick on pony when he was sick and half the teachers wondering y ponys dad is so young and the other half looking disappointed that darry became a dropout? wut was going thru his mind (besides the fact tht pony is sick and likely exhausted bc his nightmares r keeping him up)

ty!! i live to serve (cunt)💅

also i’m rereading this after i finished and am realizing that maybe i did not answer this as best as i could have, i got carried away again🙏 bless yall for putting up w my bs because wth

- Darry was dreading this moment. He knew it was coming, he knew it was inevitable, and he knew that he couldn’t pass it off to someone else. He was the guardian, he was the first number the office secretary called. They worked to get into contact with him, no one else

- So Darry is given his lunch break early to go and pick up his brother from school, the one he’s been told just threw up in the nurse’s office and woke up from a nap screaming. Maybe they should have given him just one more week

- Darry thinks about a lot on the drive over. He can’t understand the way Pony is expressing his grief because Darry never let himself feel it the way Pony does. He thinks the best way to deal with it is to dig his heels in and push back, and since it worked for him, he’s under the impression that it would work for anyone if they’d just try

- Cut Darry some slack he’s got a lot on his plate this is just him wishing there was less

- He actually does believe it though

- Will Rogers is smaller than he remembers when he pulls into the visitors parking lot. He can see his old parking spot as he walks towards the entrance, taken up by a new senior, because that’s what time does. It erases and fills in, relinquishes and moves on

- There’s a new lady working the front desk in the office. She’s young, got maybe just a few years on him. His face isn’t the first thing she looks at when he walks in. A couple of months ago, he would have picked up what she was putting down, even leaned into it. Now, it makes him squirm

- When Darry tells her he’s picking up a Ponyboy Curtis from the nurse, her eyebrows get a formal introduction to her hairline. At first, Darry doesn’t understand what’s got her so shocked, but then she goes to the phone to confirm with the nurse and says, “Hi, Colleen, I have Ponyboy’s, ah, his father here?”

- Darry keeps his face neutral, but something inside him shifts when he thinks about how they will have to replace their parents’ names with his in Pony’s file. He thinks so long about it that it doesn’t occur to him to correct the secretary

- The nurse—Mrs. Perry, if nothing had changed in the short while it took Darry to end up right back where he started—must have corrected her for him. “Oh, brother, I see.” He doesn’t like being looked at by her half-lidded eyes, but naturally she does so when saying to him, “I’m very sorry about that, Mr. Curtis. Ponyboy will be here in a moment. Is there anything else I can do for you?”

- Darry turns away and replies curtly, “No, thank you.”

- Mrs. Perry herself has walked Pony to the office, whose shoulders are sloping and head is downturned. His hair hides his face, a second shield, like he expects a verbal lashing right in front of the staff. Darry doesn’t know why. Maybe he thinks something in Darry is bound to blow, and maybe he’s right. But not now

- “I hear you’re not feeling too hot, Pony,” he tries, and Pony shrugs. Darry doesn’t try again, just accepts the absence note from the secretary

- “It’s good to see you again, Darrel. You look healthy,” Mrs. Perry says. Her lipsticked smile is warm and further crinkles her eyes, but a certain sadness weighs her old features down. Darry always liked her and, having been a football player, spent a decent chunk of time sitting in her office for the old once-over. She might have been one of the first people to tell him he was going places, all the way back in his sophomore year

- A sweet old lady, disappointed by the twist of fate but with no way of saying that to Darry’s face

- “Thank you, ma’am,” Darry says, and drops a hand on Pony’s shoulder. It unbalances his kid brother more than it ought to, so he takes it as an opportunity to get the hell out of there. “It was good seeing you again.”

- “Likewise. Take care, Ponyboy. Feel better soon.”

- Pony nods, goes for a tight-lipped smile. It’s better than nothing, so Darry lets him off easy

- They get back to the truck and Pony is curled up in the passenger seat, leaning on the door and hugging his bag. The back of his head is turned to Darry while he watches the window

- Darry starts the car. “You shouldn’t have gone to school if you weren’t feeling good.”

- Pony mumbles under his breath

- “Words, Ponyboy. You gotta use ‘em if you want people to understand what you’re saying.”

- “You told me it was time to go back. I’ve spent enough time lazing around on my ass, you said. You said that.”

- Darry’s grip on the wheel paints a white streak across his knuckles. “Obviously if you’re sick and throwing up, you stay home. You forgot to mention that part this morning. Hey, look at me when I’m talking to you.” Pony was possibly about to say something, but Darry cut him off. He was too angry to hear him out. “I had to use up my lunch break to pick you up today and you’re real lucky I hadn’t taken it yet, because that would be money down the drain. You get that, Ponyboy? That I have to actually work to make sure we keep a roof over our heads?”

- Pony doesn’t clap back when Darry expects him to. It quickly drains all the fight from his body and unwraps the pressure in his chest, realizing that arguing has become more familiar than just talking. It’s like he doesn’t know how to converse with Pony anymore without it dissolving into a yelling match to see who’ll shove the last word in

- He’s sick, Darry remembers, and all Darry knows how to do to get a word out of him is to yell. They never used to come to blows this quick

- But if Pony would just think first, use the God-given head he’s got on his shoulders, so many arguments would be avoided. Darry would have let him stay home from school if he’d been told that Pony was under the weather, right?

- “Just forget it,” Pony mutters, pulling his bag closer to his chest and setting his gaze back out the window

- Darry glances at him, then fixes his eyes on the road, stuck wondering how he let it get this bad

ignore the fact i wrote fanfiction in bullet points lmfao i was cheffing it up too hard

[meenawrites]

Junior Year Ep 2!

Am I going to do this watch along style? Don't know, but for now I'll try to be consistent as I watch this.

SO Night Yorb sealed away yayyyyyyy

Gorgug thinks he sealed him away and you know what I'm fully content to let him believe that, he deserves it after all the Hangvan has been put through and having to build the sun lasso anyway.

Biggest thing I didn't see coming was Ecaf shattering. Side note about that, anyone else realize her name is just Face spelled backwards?? LIKE BRENNAN! LOL! Fabian being heartbroken is so funny and then they spin the wildest tale about her being a 'turncoat', I"M DEAD! But I do agree with Riz, Fabian's great romance CANNOT be a mirror. I refuse. Them mending her ans slipping her into Adaine's jacket is hilarious. 10/10. Definitely not gonna backfire. No way.

What do you mean Gorgug and Zelda broke up?????? EXCUSE ME?! THEY WERE THE CUTEST COUPLE EVER WHAT HAPPENED! (I mean I think Fig and Ayda are cuter but still they're up there). Glad to see that Zelda's dad is still the same though lol

ALSO TRACKER AND KRISTEN BROKE UP WTH??? WHY?? They seemed like the most solid couple! I demand to know what happened!! By the way the new art of Tracker is FIRE!

Please, Riz trying to find a way for them to all go to college together is so freaking cute, I'm dead.

Glad Ayda is having bonding time with her dad but I was so looking forward to having her around this season, I'm devastated.

AND WHAT DO YOU MEAN GHILEAR ISN'T GOING TO BE HERE FOR THE SEASON?! MY FAV NPC! MY FAV PATHETIC DAD! You know something is wrong when seeing Ghilear actually have a stroke of luck was genuinely off putting. I was like hang on, something isn't right here. Is this an impostor? Happy for him but I'm similarly if not more devastated that he will not be around.

Still want to know if Aelwyn and Fabian got their freak on and if so what happened? Also what happened to the sisters trying to be family again and then Aelwyn goes and moves out a year later? Feels just a tad like a cop out to not have her be a major player in the season but whatever I'll let it slide.

I feel like Kristen loses her purpose like every season at this point lol, but in a different way, like what's going on? Relatable but still.

The nemesis abjurative ward was hilarious though lol.

Adaine's mom is still alive so Adaine doesn't have any money?? Unbelievable, her mother is an international criminal, why does she still have any power over Adaine's inhertiance??

Also Riz's mom not getting pension is bogus omg, my poor cool mom Sklonda! Sklonda my beloved! Can Gorthalax not get some money from hell? Is that allowed? Also where is he? I've been dying to get Sklonda/Gorthalax crumbs since they were officially declared a thing and that still hasn't been delivered to me. Sad times.

That cracking that's happening to Cassandra really freaked me out omg, Kristen do your job as her friend and saint!

Side note, the dome looks HELLA COOL!!!

[silviakundera]

The Princess Royal ep 27 and 28

The moment when both Li Rong and Su Rongqing are like SHIT, your brother stepped into our game of thrones.

Damn it Su Ronghua, omg this is making me more heated than in the book.

now they're giving me the future flash of his death to make me sad but NO. NO! ACUALLY IDC. everything is your fault. 😤

blah blah romance with Shauggan Ya NO. NO NO NO. JAIL FOR 10000 YEARS

It's divorce era! SRQ's absolutely full proof plan has NOT devolved into a scenario that will lend PWX more power and cause his ex to soon start humping him like rabbits.... right... right?????

but who caresssss when my bro Cui Yulang is back in town 🎉

THE WAY HE HAS BOTH SRQ AND PWX SO PRESSED because they know he would hit that with the fury of god lololol

Look I do hate Consort Ruo but this whole poisoning the emperor thing is her 1 good idea

I am a simple woman who enjoys watching SRQ realize he's been clowned. And drunk Cui Yulang and exasperated Li Rong passing back & forth messages

Every time he brushes back a tendril of hair, I can hear her from the novel, "Be normal!"

They kept it! So I can be a softy and I admit was a bit charmed by this minor character when LR shared her view of someone with talent and perhaps desire to be of use, but who in her life never accomplished anything... and then he stops pretending to be a shallow pretty face for a moment to confess the real reason he wants to work for her is simply that he thinks she cares about people. I was disarmed by the way he doesn't think she'll believe that - but she immediately does (how few people have believed that about her, how few people have taken him seriously)

They even included PWX's petty ass fucking with the carriage 😭

Oh pleaaaaseeeeee Cui Yulang trying to come up with complaints about Li Chuan and everyone is like ?? ?? 😭😭😭

MY BODY IS READYYYYY for Li Rong digging a big pit with spikes and convincing Consort Ruo to enthusiastically jump in

Please don't let me down drama, I want that whole scheme!

For once the Su Rongqing and Li Rong scene actually worked for me. I did feel that moment where she bluntly references that this battle is heading in 1 direction: one of them will fall. We can see the blow hit both them. SRQ has been stubbornly in denial that this fight is against her faction but he's not taking her down - not truly. Not this time. But she just ripped all pretense away.

(this is where the story gets me to care about their dynamic. not as a love triangle, which it never really has been. but as 2 broken things that used to huddle in the dark to keep warm, now with a new chance in the light... and this is what they're going to do with it? fight to the death? it's sad.)

My darling Pei Wenxuan has not actually lost in brains from jealousy. Good for him.

(In the novel during this time he's secretly plotting shit about the exams and hiding it from LR, because of the whole 'we used to be the leaders of 2 competing factions in the last life' thing that LR was originally concerned about but then the glow of love made her stop being concerned about it, but guess!! what!!)

(I'm 98% sure they are gonna simplify that conflict.)

"Would you like to have the Inspectorate Office?" yaaasss lets goooooo

Su Rongqing, having no idea of wth is going on: Am.... I about to be clowned ?

as of Round 3 (work in progress):

Li Rong: 2

Su Rongqing: 0

Cui Yulang: my sincere love & devotion, whatever what's worth

[preview shows that next 2 episodes start some horny sneaking around ! whee!]

[imthepunchlord]

Did you watch Season 5 of Miraculous? What did you think of it?

I stopped watching Miraculous at s3, I didn't watch s4 or s5, but I've heard a bit about it. Technically can't really give an opinion but I can share what I think based on what I heard.

I heard Adrienette dating was not too bad, but should've been much sooner. I agree. Could've saved us a bunch of trouble and salt. I also heard that they had the most powerful kiss that adults literally could not tear them apart XD that was funny to hear.

I got to learn that melting Miraculous down doesn't count as destroying them so, who's going to tell Frodo the one ring actually isn't destroyed as apparently melting doesn't count as destroying. Who knew?

And I got to learn that Gabriel was able to make the wish, getting what he ultimately wanted terrorizing all of Paris for 5 seasons, is remembered as a hero, and Adrien never learns about it which is all a really big wth. From what I've seen, no one was happy about that.

Uuuuh... I heard Lila got exposed, but it was meh. I heard she now goes by Cerise? Which ok, let's just make this confusing character even more confusing. Also, how much you want to bet that Cerise/Lila will join them in high school, and there's a repeat of Marinette knowing that's Lila who is lying to them but no one believes her and thinks Cerise is someone entirely new.

Ummmmmmm... oh, I heard Feligami is now a thing? Very rushed and kinda creepy/weird? But I guess they did a decent job as I do see the occasional fanart for them. Personally, I'll just stick to Kagami with girls. That moment in Riptose stuck with me waaaay to much to really get behind her being more interested in boys. I will say, Adrigami did have some nice moments, and there's concepts there where I think they can work nicely off each other (Adrien needs to learn to grow a backbone while Kagami wants to rebel and make friends, they can help each other with that), so Adrien could be the only guy I could roll with for her, but still prefer her paired with girls more.

Also I guess Felix is now a hero despite stealing the yo-yo from Ladybug and handing off... 14 Miraculous to Gabriel. And presumably making him more dangerous/difficult, though he is an idiot so I don't know how much more challenging he got. As far as I know, it was pretty much like another Tuesday.

Oh and apparently there will now be 18 heroes in Paris as I got to learn through asks. I wonder how that's going to work, if at all. Place your bets on how often we'll even see those full time heroes, as they can't really take much attention away from Marinette and Adrien, but who knows. S6 is in that weird placement now that Thomas is no longer apart of the development of ML, so it's hard to say how different it'll go.

Oh. I don't like Tikki and Plagg's true forms. Kinda Digimon over complicated design, and biblical in aesthetic which I found weird when they're supposed to be tied to Taoism. I have yet to find anything similar to biblical angels in Toaism, so I feel like this design choice works off a Christian view more (which isn't surprising as Plagg works off the unlucky black cat, which is exclusively from Christian Europe roughly 400 years ago).

Additionally, Gimmi felt like more of a Nooroo true form, than a fusion of Plagg and Tikki. I think they should've brought the concept of Null back. I think they were a better thought of a fusion of Creation and Destruction as these two concepts brought together would just nullify each other.

So over all, based on what I've heard, it's a pretty negative view of s5.

[lovemishjen]

HELLO, i have a question about j2m. Do u think they're close friends or even friends in this day and age? Im a new fan and i dont have that much info about them yet, but i love them dearly. and i want a non delusional answer from someone.

Hello,

It's nice to get a normal question, instead of the usual troll-ish ones.

Alright, let's get down to this.

Disclaimer: I do not know these these gentlemen or their families personally, and I am not even American. But I have been in the fandom since 2009, on tumblr since 2010 I think. So this is based on my observation from con panels, especially jibcon, and social media interactions with each other over the years. I have not been super active in the fandom since over a year though.

If you a J2M fan, you should watch this honcon panel that is a sheer definition of fun 👆🏽

I think Jensen and Jared hit it off initially and were friends on set and even shared a home for a while.

Later on, Danneel and Gen and J2 would hang out, but at some point they had a falling out. I personally think the ladies did not just get along wth each other, need not have been a big falling out. They are different personalities and strong women and it's not necessary to become besties just because their husbands work together. Later, the men themselves had a falling out, the details of which we might never know.

This post is far more well-researched and well-explained than I will have ever patience for 👇🏽

Jensen and Misha, after a lukewarm start in early season 4 filming, started getting along really well. I believe a huge reason for this is that Danneel adores Misha, and she has always been vocal about it. Check out Jenmisheel tag to check out stories of their hanging out. One of the incidents is the story of Danneel and Misha eating chillies and Jensen laughing about, is one of the examples of this.

But also, Misha has been a great influence on Jackles. Misha had quite a wild youth, his ex-wife even wrote a book on threesomes! But he became a father first, mellowed down and being older as well, you always get a sense that Jensen looked up to him. While his relation with Jared was more of a fun buddy, I get the feeling that Jensen and Misha have an equation where they can sit and have a serious conversation.

But all three of them, and the rest of the cast as well, did have a lot of fun together. Have you watched the mockumentary directed by Misha? If not, do watch.. you will love it!

By the final seasons, Jensen and Misha seemed very obviously closer.

Their 10 year friendship post by Jensen was far too serious, unlike other fun posts, so he seems to give a lot of importance to their friendship.

Currently, I think Jensen and Jared are cordial and wish each other on birthdays and other occasions, and the same with Misha and Jared. I think Jensen and Misha interact more often and touch base more frequently, but if they meet up in person, and how often is not something we know. Unlike say Richard Speight Jr and Rob Benedict, who were (are?) doing a podcast together, and so we know they hang out a lot. With J2M, they are not super-active on social media off late, so we don't know as much.

Let me know if you have any other questions.

[aissa-snapped]

Vikings and Hairstylists

Summary:You get the opportunity to work on the set of Vikings. But when you meet your celebrity crush, how will you react? Will anything happen between you two?

A/N This was so exicitng for me to write. I hope yall will enjoy this as much as I did.

Word count:8795

You couldn`t believe it. You got the job! This was so unbelievable, that you kept repeating the memory of how it went down.

You were fresh out of Beauty School, looking for a job. Ever since you started watching hair braiding tutorials on youtube, which was a few years back, you found a new passion for hair. You watched every hair video, hair routine, hair products reviews there was on the internet, and you couldn`t wait to one day become a famous hairstylist, specializing in braids and giving people the hair of their dreams.

With that in mind, you were trying to gather your thoughts and come up with a strategic plan that could allow you to launch a career in this field. Maybe I should ask around at salons to take me in as an assistant. That would give me a good start. You thought. Many people started off as just that, hairstylist assistants. But that was not to be looked down upon, for it was the best way to practice and learn more tricks.

You were getting tired, and decided to just let the idea rest at the back of your head, and switched to scrolling through Instagram. It was as if the Gods were guiding you towards your path, because it was at that very moment that you opened the app, that you saw something that was a clear sign of the Higher Beings listening to your cries.

`` FELLOW VIKINGS FANS, WE ARE ANNOUNCING SOMETHING VERY EXCITING. WE ARE OFFERING OUR FANS A CHANCE TO COME ON SET AND WORK WITH THE AMAZING VIKINGS TEAM. WE ARE HAVING 5 OPEN SPOTS FOR NEW HAIRSTYLISTS, TO COME AND WORK CLOSELY WITH OUR CAST. REQUIREMENTS: -A DIPLOMA THAT LEGALLY ALLOWS THE PERSON TO WORK AS A Hairstylist and -A PORTOFOLIO OF PREVIOUS HAIRSTYLES DONE ON VARIOUS TYPES OF HAIR ( LONG, SHORT, CURLY,STRAIGHT) SEND US YOUR PORTOFOLIO TO OUR E-MAIL, ALONG WTH A VIDEO OF YOURSELF DOING AN INTRICATE BRAID (YOU CAN USE A REAL PERSON OR A MANNEQUIN) WE WILL SEND AN E-MAIL TO THE 5 LUCKY PEOPLE WHO WON THE CONTEST.

It was utterly shocking. Mouth agape, you re-read the announcement at least ten times, before finally squealing in happiness. You were a HUGE fan of the TV series Viking, hence you were trembling, and with shaky hands, you closed your phone, taking deep breaths in and out to calm yourself.

Moments later, with a clear head, you re-read the requirements, and frowned at the one year experience requirement. Your beauty school lasted exactly one year, and you had to also help at the salon you were studying at, so you wondered if that can count as experience. As for the portofolio, you had done some amazing hairstyles on your models, and, thank the Gods, you were now more than ever grateful for the fact that youve had this inclination towards braids, because half of your phones gallery was full with photos of you doing all sorts of braid variations on your friends. You even took inspiration from the show, and tried to recreate one of the most complex braids on your models. So your portofolio was pretty solid.

It had been days after you sent the requested things to the Vikings e-mail, and you couldnt sit still for not even one second. You kept checking your e-mail, your Instagram dms every hour, fidgeting with your phone all day long. You told your family and closest friend about this of course, and they were all very happy you found this opportunity, tho you could tell by their eyes that they felt sympathy for you, knowing you`d never get selected out of all thousands of fans out there.

And you, too, started to believe it slowly, after each day passed away without any feedback from the Vikings team. So you decided you wouldn`t sulk around, and you started enjoying your free time by meeting up with your girlfriends and forgetting you even submitted the e-mail.

Until one day, when it was late and you checked your e-mail for a confirmation code for an app, that you saw another e-mail had been sent, and when you saw who was it from, you almost threw your phone up to the ceiling, almost smashing it in excitement. The Vikings team had written back to you, expressing their amazement and eagerness to have you as a new member of their team.

And now you were on a plane, on your way to Dublin, to start working on the set of Vikings. This was still so surreal, you had to hold back giggles and excitement, not wanting to look like a maniac to the other people around. Oh, if only they knew where you were going.

Once youve landed and got your baggage, you were met with a large crowd of people, each standing and waiting for someone. You glanced around the crowd, until you noticed a man in a black, fancy suit and a woman standing next to him, holding a big sign with your name on it. You rolled your baggage over there, greeting both of them politely. '' Hello there. I am Emily. And this is Kevin, one of the drivers. We will take you to the hotel now, and in the meantime, I will explain to you briefly tomorrows schedule.'' She smiled kindly, putting a hand on your back and guiding you towards the exit, while Kevin took the baggage for you, carrying it towards the car.

The ride was about twenty five minutes, enough for Emily to give you a rundown of how everything works around there. Tomorrow, you were going to be picked up by the same driver at around 5 am, and then taken to the set. You were going to meet Shaila, the main stylist, who will guide you and show you what you have to do. It seemed easy enough, only, you couldn`t believe you were going to meet the actors you were only used to seeing on TV. You were especially nervous to meet Alex, who plays Ivar. Emily also explained how the filming of season 5 was beginning officially tomorrow, and that you would witness first hand how the magic happens.

Once you reached the hotel, you glanced at the name. Conrad Dublin. 5 Stars. Damn It looked extremely luxurious. You were dearly hoping you wouldn`t be the one paying for the stay.

Emily helped you check in, while Kevin brought in your luggage.

'' This is yours.'' She handed you a keycard, with the numbers 203 on it. '' Today is your free day. As its only 3 in the afternoon, you can feel free to explore the area. The center is less than a kilometer away. Theres tons of pubs around here, stores, supermarkets. The company will take care of your bills for the room. Unfortunately, we do not offer an included breakfast pack with the stay, but seeing you are on set more than half a day, we have a buffet there, so you don't have to worry about that. my suggestion, don't stay up too late. Go to sleep earlier, and don't forget, be out here before 5. Other than that…'' She trailed off, seemingly trying to think if she told you everything you needed to know. '' Well, I guess that`s it. Feel free to explore the city. Bye.'' She waved and left with Kevin.

You went to your room, plopping down on your bed. It was a small hotel room, but honestly who cared? It was so luxurious, and so well kept, you were at first afraid to touch anything. You inhaled the fresh smell of the sheets, sighing in contentment.

You wondered, were you the only one staying at the hotel? Or were there other cast/crew members?

You took a nice cold shower, trying to get off that travel dirt off of you. You got out of the shower all energized, ready to go for a little stroll. Changing in a simple oversized shirt, with a David Bowie picture on it, and comfy sweatpants, you grabbed your phone, placing your keycard inside your phonecase and took the elevator down to the lobby.

Taking a brisk walk, you took every second to glance at various buildings, appreciating the infrastructure. As Emily said, there were tons of pubs, and in your 10 minute walk, you saw at least 5. You loved the Dublin atmosphere. For a capital city, it wasnt as crowded or as loud as you would have guessed. Or maybe that was just because you werent necessarily in a touristic area.

You decided to turn back around, after 30 minutes of walking, deciding this was enough walking. On your way back home, you stopped at a supermarket, called Fresh and bought some junk food that would get you going until the next day.

You finally reached your hotel room, plopping onto the bed yet again and turned on the TV, for some background noise. You opened your bag of chips, along with you store bought coffee, and started snacking, while texting your family, letting them know you got to the hotel all safely. When it was around 10 pm, you decided you should listen to Emily, and go to sleep.

You were rudely snapped out of your deep sleep by your alarm, ringing insistently. With a grunt, you quickly turned it off, and after a few seconds of staying motionless, you rolled out of bed with a long sigh. You brushed your teeth, washed your face with some cold water, to get the puffiness out of your eyes to go down, and then went straight to the pre-established clothes you decided on wearing the previous night. You weren`t aware of any dresscodes, so you decided not to overdress, nor underdress. So your final decision was a pair of clean, simple jeans, a plain white shirt, and a pair of green converse. You hoped this would suffice. Grabbing your handy-dandy backpack, packed with your essentials, you headed towards the exit of the building.

It was really chilly outside. The sun wasn't even up yet, and well, considering it was still 4 50 am, it wasn't a shocker. Down at the lobby, you couldn't see anybody. Not even the receptionist.

A couple of chuckles were heard behind you, and you turned to see a group of 4 girls coming up to you.

'' Hey… You don't happen to be the new hairstylist…for you-know what, do you?'' A blonde girl asked.

You were wondering if thee girls were the other 4 contestants that won. '' For… The.. Show you mean?'' You asked directly. The other 3 girls giggled, and the blonde one smiled. '' Yeah. That`s what I meant. I had to make sure you're not just a random person. You see, we signed some papers, that forbid us to tell other people where we actually work.''

'' Oh..really?''

'' Yeah. Anyway, I am Aurora. The ginger one is Phoebe, that one is Amalia and Cassie.'' She presented, pointing to a curly haired girl, with ginger hair, respectively two brunettes, one with long hair, Cassie and the short haired brunette Amalia.

'' Yn.'' You replied timidly, slightly intimidated by how beautiful these girls were.

You 5 started chatting, asking each other basic questions, such as how and why you got into this field, for how long, and other personal ones, until you were interrupted by the arrival of Kevin, who waited patiently and silently for you all to climb into his vehicle. He greeted you all with a short mornin and then remained silent throughout the whole car ride, that was fortunately filled with the conversations struck by the girls.

Half an hour later, you came to a stop, somewhere far from the city, on a hill, that looked pretty much like it was in the middle of nowhere. But at a second glace, you notice, you were in some form of parking, for there were many cars around the place, scattered messily over a mile, and tons of trailers at a walking distance. You girls were guided by Kevin through a little gate, who was guarded by a security man, and after checking your ID`s, you were told to go find trailer number 13.

You felt your nerves resurfacing. You were actually here. On the set of one of the most streamed shows. Luckily, you werent completely alone, as you had the new found girls by your side. You all found the trailer, and by public demand, you were chosen to be the one to knock on the door. Shakily, you used your knuckles to hit the door two times, hoping someone inside heard it. After you all heard a faintcome in`, you opened the door and stepped into the trailer, with the rest of the girls following you.

Once inside, you noticed three typical hair stations you'd see at any salon, with a mirror each, and pictures of the actors with the hair on. At last, you glanced at the far end of the trailer, bent down, a woman. She quickly stood up, and that's when you finally glanced over her frame. She was a woman in her mid 40s, with a chubbier figure, mid length hair, with some blonde highlights all over. She looked very kind, like a mother that would bake you cookies every day.

'' `Ello girls. I'm Shaila. The main hairstylist. '' She shook hands with every girl, listening in return for each of their names.

'' Right. So let's get straight to it. This is the first week of filming season 5. We have an awful lot of new characters, and old ones that need an upgrade. Today is Monday. We don't usually film on Mondays. We test new hairstyles, see what works, what doesnt. We prepare for the shooting days. Michael told me about the contest. Ever since I told him we need more stylists, he's been doing the most to gather some new ones. The thing is girls,'' at this, she was giving you all a nervous look. '' This week you 5 will be on probation. That means, by the end of week, we will announce which one of you will be staying here permanently. I know the announcement said 5 people will be working here, but truth is, in the meantime, we have found 4 other stylists that are more familiar with working on a movie/TV show set. But, we are in need of one more. So you have until Friday to do your best, impress us and we will decide who will get the post.'' She finished, studying each girl independently. There was a dull silence.

You glanced at Aurora, next to you, but she was looking down. Shaila was waiting for someone to ask a question, but after a few moments, she took the silence as a que to speak again.

'' Alright. So each one of you will be working closely to one of the other main stylist. I am now going to tell you who is going in which trailer.'' She then proceeded to assign each girl to a separate trailer. '' You Yn, will be working in this trailer with me. Alright… Now-'' she glanced at her watch.

'' Oh dear, we need to hurry. It`s 5:30. The cast will be here any minute. You girls go ahead. We will see each other at lunch. '' She shooed them off, shutting the door behind them. Once you were left alone with Shaila, she turned around and grinned at you.

''So… Yn. Beautiful name. Unique. Here let me show you.'' She pointed at each seat. '' In this trailer, we work always on the same three people. Look here.'' Glancing at her pointy finger, you followed it and saw there were several pictures with whom you recognized as the Ragnarsons, with the focus on their hair, from different angles.

'' We mainly work on Ubbe, Hvitserk and Ivar`s character here…'' She trailed off. '' You know who they are I assume?'' You nodded quickly.

'' My colleague, Peter, works alongside me. And you see, Ivars hair was, so far, short. So there wasnt much to do. But as for this season, we are going to change his hairstyle, because his hair has grown out some more and we have more options. You see, as characters evolve, so does their hair. So we were in need of someone new to work with us. Because without a third stylist here, it would be too difficult for us two to finish their hair on time.''

With widened eyes, you looked at her, amazed that you will be meeting one of your favorite characters in a few. You nodded along with everything Shaila was saying, to show her you were paying attention.

Soon enough, Peter joined you two. He was a rather tall scrawny man, short gingered hair and a slight beard coming through. He was super funny, and very energetic, for the fact that it was this early in the morning. But that could`ve also been an added factor from the coffee in his hand.

You were getting more nervous by the minute, knowing the three main characters of the show would be walking in at any given moment. Peter and Shaila were conversing casually, not the least bit worried or nervous, as you were. Which was understandable. They`ve been here for quite a long time.

Lacing at your smartwatch, you felt your heart jolting, when you heard faint masculine voices, fastly approaching the trailer. Now, more than ever, you felt as if your heart would jump right out of your body. With a loud creak, the trailer`s door was forcefully opened, in stepping the boisterous boys. You first saw a bearded man, with his sides shaved, and a base cap on, greeting Shaila and Peter. Second, you saw a young man with quite longer hair than the first one, holding a beer in his hand, and laughing obnoxiously loud at someone behind him. And then, you saw… Him.

Your celebrity crush, the most handsome man youve ever set eyes on. He was talking in a language you couldnt comprehend. Must be Danish. Sporting a simple black shirt, and grey sweatpants, hair in an improvised man bun, he stepped into the trailer last, shutting the door loudly behind him.

The boys all struck up a conversation with Shaila, while each going to their assigned chairs. It was only after another minute, and Shaila mentioning there`s someone else in the trailer, that they all glanced at you, through their respective mirrors.

You made yourself look as small as possible, for it was under their gazes that you felt like a little mouse in a wolf`s den, if that makes sense. They all smiled at you, and one by one, got up from their seats and lined up to greet and shake hands with you.

'' Jordan Patrick. Nice to meet you.'' The bearded man presented himself, giving you a firm handshake. You could hear a very strong Australian accent from him. '' Yn.'' You said quietly, hoping he won't make you repeat it. '' Marco.'' The second man seemed to have a little smirk on his face, and took it a step further and kissed the back of your hand.

You blushed furiously, even forgetting to say your name back. Last, but not least, Alex approached you. '' Alex. Nice to meet you.'' He grinned, waiting for you to shake hands, but when you reached out, he instead put his arms around you, pulling you into a bear hug. You took a second to react, and when you came back to your senses, you hugged him back, but not with the same intensity, as you feared you would come off as a crazy fan. Your cheeks were so hot, you could feel it.

When he pulled away, he winked at you, and when he turned around, he grinned at Marco. He got seated back in between Marco and Jordan, looking at the former. ''Fik hende til at rødme'' He said something to Marco, not that you could understand it, and he started laughing while Marco was scoffing, almost jokingly. ( Made her blush)

Shaila showed you how a normal day looks like in the trailer, explaining theoretically and visually how she worked on the boys hair. She showed you reference photos and other sketches of how she was imagining Ivar`s hair this season.

'' I want to start today with something simple. Can you do Dutch braids?'' She asked. You nodded promptly.

'' Good. Please start with a central braid, and then two smaller Dutch braids on each side of his hair.'' She showed you, using her fingers, where she imagined each section to start and end.

With clammy hands, ( you quickly wiped them on your jeans, trying to be discreet) you picked your rat tail comb, and started sectioning the central part for the braid. While doing so, Alex was watching your every movement, making it even more difficult for you to calm down.

Once you had each section parted and clipped out of the way, you slowly started working on the biggest braid. The first few strands of the braid were beginning to create the shape of the it, and you were getting into your element. Before you even realized it, you had the first braid finished, and began working on the side ones.

The other actors were chatting with each other, occasionally Shaila piping in, or Peter saying a very corny joke. You loved Alexs laugh. It was so genuine and filled with happiness. You could only imagine what it must feel like to hear it every day. You sighed.Oh great, nows not the time to daydream about being his gilfriend.

Alex glanced back at you after he heard you sigh, lifting one eyebrow at you. Making eye contact through the mirror, you refrained a smile appearing on your face, and immediately looked away from him. You heard him chuckle quietly, and then engaged back in a conversation with the other guys.

You notified Shaila, hoping she will satisfied with your work. Alex looked at you, giving you a thumbs up and an encouraging smile.

'' Hmm.. You could`ve added a bit more gel here. See these tiny fly aways? And tease the hair at the roots just slightly here on top, for a bit of volume. We want to make sure it appears they have lots of hair. '' She continued analyzing each braid carefully, humming to herself.

''But overall, this is really good. You did great. For your first day. '' She patted you on the shoulder.

Alex winked at you, causing you to turn away from him to hide your blush. Damn he really is flirty you thought.

When all the guys were finished, they all ran out of the trailer to check the set, run lines and gods know what else actors do.

You were left with Shaila, while Peter left the trailer to smoke a cig. The woman pulled a head mannequin out of a cabinet, and began showing you typical braids they do on extras, teaching you and giving you tips here and there where she felt like it.

Hours later, you were starting to get hungry. It had been hours of you just standing in the trailer. Shaila insisted on showing you every single little tool in there, explain to you how a real work day unfolds, since she didnt consider this particular day to be one at its full intensity, which quite frankly scared you, because this was already too much, but if this wasnt the hardest, then what was to come?

Around lunch time, the two adults led you towards the lunch tents. It was like at a festival, with big tents, dozen of wodden benches, and so many people, it was crazy. Shaila showed you where to go to get your food from, and then she left back towards the trailer stating she had some work to finish up for tomorrow.

You felt so intimidated by the number of these people, and you hoped you could see the girls somewhere, so you could go to them.

Once you grabbed your lunch, which was mostly mashed potatoes, some tomato salad and some grilled cheese, you desperately tried spotting some known faces around here, for a second time.

It seemed impossible in this sea of people, so you now decided to walk towards the exit, hoping to find an empty table, but as you were passing between tables, you heard someone yell out your name.

You turned your head and tried to find the person who shouted, and almost instantly you spotted Alex, waving his hands highly in the air, as if attempting to make himself noticeable for you. You stood there motionless, unsure if he was actually the one to shout at you, but when you saw him make a hand gesture that signaled for you to come over, you took slow, self-conscious steps towards him.

He seemed eager to have you approach, and once you reached his table, he put his hand on your back, guiding you to sit down next to him.

Now that you were finally settled, you looked around the table, and you almost screamed. You saw Marco and Jordan, but also recognized Alexander Ludwig, who plays Bjorn. and then you also observed a beautiful blonde girl, sitting next to him, whom you knew to be Georgia Hirst.

You were sat down next to Alex, who himself was sat between yourself and Marco, and then on the opposite side, you had Georgia sitting right face to face with you, next to Jordan and then finally Alexander.

'' Alex, who have you brought here?'' Asked Alexander, with a teasing tone and nudging Jordan to join in on his teasing.

'' Oh. She`s the new hairstylist in my trailer.'' He put his left hand on your right shoulder, squeezing it softly.

You laughed softly. '' Uhm actually… I`m on… probation. We will find out who stays here permanently at the end of the week.'' You chuckled nervously.

'' Well, I Know you will. Cuz you were so good with your hands.'' Alex said, seemingly not aware of how that sounded. Once the other guys started laughing and hooting at what he said, he blushed and tried to correct himself. ''I- meant shes fast. She worked really fast. Thats what I me- Oh Shut it'' He reached across the table to whack Alexander on the arm from all the teasing he was doing.

You looked at your food, starting to feast on it and ignoring the comments flying around you.

'' And what is your name?'' You made eye contact with Georgia, who seemed to be the sweetest and the most normal person from this table.

'' Yn.'' You replied shortly, and then started eating some tomatoes, hoping no one would talk to you anymore, because you were hungry and wanted to be left alone.

''So…? Tell us!'' Alex insisted, looking at you and waiting for something from you.

Confused, you frowned your eyebrows at him, shrugging '' Tell you..what?''

'' Well about you. How you got here, how long have you been doing hair, have you watched the show?''

And so you answered all their questions. Well, more than 90% of them were fired by Alex, but occasionally one of the other guys would also ask you something as well. Georgia listened intently to what you had to say, but then calmed Alex and the other boys down when she noticed you were starting to get overwhelemd.

'' That`s enough. Let her eat.'' And with that, the boys listened like good children, and left you tending to your food.

Right before you all left, he saw you standing up ready to leave, so he asked you to give him your instagram.

You were quite embarrassed to have him look at your profile, knowing the photos you`ve taken were not nearly half as good as his, but then you also thought, he asked for it, so he should suffer the consequences.

You were back at the trailer, and for the next hours, you were told to recreate some hairstyle Shaila showed you on a picture, until it was finally time to go home.

You were completely exhausted. And you were scared for tomorrow. You went to the parking lot, found Kevin and jumped into the car, finding relief in being able to sit down and give your legs a bit of relief. The other girls approached the car one by one, and when you were all in, you all started sharing your today`s experience.

'' I met Harald Finehair GUYS. UGH he was so fine.'' Amalia said, exaggerating and making you all gag and giggle.

'' Ew stop it. He`s way too old for you. But I met Georgia Hirst and Ida. They were super nice.'' Phoebe added.

When you told them about who you met, they all seemed a bit.. Jealous? They gave you a fake smile, and then quickly changed the subject.

Once you reached your room, you sighed in relief, finally you were alone. You took a shower, dried up and then you pulled your phone out, noticing all the unread messages from your frineds. After you answered them all, you went on Instagram out of habit.

You went to see you had some notifications. iris2002 liked your post 3h carina0_donnell liked your post 4h alexhoeghandersen liked your post 6h alexhoeghandersen liked your post 6h alexhoeghandersen started following you 6h

WAIT WHAT??!?!!? HE FOLLOWED ME BACK?! SHIT I mean, it was expected. After all, he did just ask for your Instagram didn`t he?

You checked your dms, seeing as you had some unread messages on there as well, but the one that popped before everyone else, was from the same person who had followed you back a few hours ago.

You shakily opened the chat, not knowing what to expect.

Heej. What are you doing? Hiii. I just got back to the hotel. im so exhausted

I know how you feel you hungry? do you maybe uh wanna grab some food? I know a few good places around Dublin :))

You blinked rapidly, your heartbeat rising. Was that for real? You kept clicking on his name, checking to see if he is the Real Alex. You left him on read for a few minutes, while you were contemplating on whether or not you should go.

With sweaty hands, you unlocked your phone again, and decided to give him an answer sure... let's do it. I'm starving

great. which hotel are you staying at? Conrad Dublin

gotcha. I'll be there in half an hour

`Half an hour? shit. I need to get ready.

You got out of your freshly put on pijamas, and rummaged through your luggage for some decent clothing. You opted for another oversized t-shirt, with a Jurassic Park logo on it, and your trusted shorts, who fit on your bum perfectly. Messing with your hair a bit, you ruffled it, and then you decided you`d just tie it in a bun. You grabbed your trusted perfume, and sprayed it once on each side of your neck.

You grabbed your fanny pack, strapping it over one shoulder and put your phone inside it, grabbing also some cash and your keycard.

The moment you stepped into the elevator, you felt your heart once again start galloping inside you. How could this happen, and on the first day?

Once you stepped into the lobby, you were aiming for the exit, until you saw a familiar guy sitting on one of the couches, on his phone. You studied him a bit. He looked so effortlessly beautiful. He was wearing a black hoodie, along with some jeans, paired with sneakers. He had his hair in a manbun, but that only made him look even hotter.

He was scrolling on his phone, with his back rested on the couch, one arm on it, and legs spread out in front of the coffee table.

It didnt take him too long after youve reached the lobby to take notice of you. When he finally did, he quickly put his phone back in his back pocket and stood up, taking long and fast strides to reach you.

'' Hey.'' He approached you and pulled you in a hug, kissing you on your temple once he let go of you.

'' Hello…'' You said timidly, not knowing what to say next.

Alex seemed to be such an expert in keeping up a conversation going, that he never allowed any sort of awkward silence fill the air. He grabbed your forearm, pulling you softly towards the exit. '' So.. What are you in the mood for?'' He broke the peaceful silence once you stepped outside. '' Mmm… Honestly? I dont know. I dont want anything fancy, but not junky either. Maybe pasta?'' You laughed awkwardly. He smiled and giggled.

'' Then pasta it is.'' He led the way, and started asking about your personal life back at home the whole way to the restaurant.

Once you`ve reached it, you read the name Sano Pizza. Looks good from the outside.

'' It`s one of my favorite restaurants. They have some amazing Pizza. And the spaghetti should also be up at the same level.'' He praised the place. You smiled and followed him inside.

He led you between many tables, and then finally in a more private and calm section, he found an empty booth for the two of you. When you finally sat down, you noticed the QR code being placed on both corners of the table, making you scoff.

Alex looked at you curiously. '' What`s the matter?''

'' This. I cant scan the fucking menu. And its so frustrating to me cuz then I have to search it up on the internet, and it takes so long. Like, give me the goddamn paper menu and we`ll be good.'' You complained, sighing in annoyance.

Alex seemed to not take your attitude too seriously, as he chuckled at you and pulled his phone out, scanning the code in less than a second and handing you his phone.

'' Here. Take a look and then let me know what youd like to eat.'' You flushed at his actions.Yeah, it was a small gesture, almost insignificant. But still, it made my heart flutter.` You went over the menu on his phone, and when you were finally ready with your order, you handed his phone back. He took it gently, cupping your hand slightly when you passed it to him.

''Alright.. What will it be then?'' '' Penne Quattro Formaggi. Aaand a lemonade.'' You nodded to yourself, thinking that`ll be good enough.

'' No dessert?'' He asked nicely. '' Nah. Im good. I probably wont even finis the pasta.'' You laughed. '' Why?'' He joined in your laugh.

You shrugged. '' I always eat half of it, then I get full and I have to sit and let my stomach digest the food. I don`t know why. The food is too dense.'' ''Dense?'' He asked, amused. ''Yeah…dense.''

He chuckled and when he saw a waiter, he waved for him to go over there. He ordered the food, and then he turned back to you, propping his chin on the palm of his hand, admiring you.

'' Uhh.. '' You chuckled nervously. '' So…'' '' What do you think? You liked your first day?'' '' Well.. It was.. Intense. A lot of new info at once, but Ill get used to it. That is..if.. Ill stay..'' You trailed off, almost with a hint of sadness, thinking of the possibility of not staying permanently.

Alex placed his warm hand over yours, rubbing your kunckles with his thumb, reassuringly. '' Youll stay. Ive seen you work. You did a great job.'' You waved a dismissive hand at him. '' No Im serious! Hey. Ive seen others work. And so far, no one has been as skilled with their hands as you.''

'' Oh… I dont know. Well see.'' ''- And even they happen to Not choose you, which, theyd have to be nuts not to, Ill talk to them personally. I`ll go straight to Michael and ask him personally we are buddies, me and him, and-''

You shook your head and giggled at him. '' Its okay. If I dont get the job, then maybe they choose someone else for a reason. Maybe Im not made for this environment. And thats okay. I`ll accept it.'' You interrupted him, assuring him you were willing to take a blow, if needed be.

Time seemed to pass so fast with him. He made you feel so at ease. He had this natural charisma about him. You were laughing the whole time, not being able to stop, he was that funny. At one point, the food showed up, and you both calmed down and dove right in.

The young actor definitely knew where to take you. The food was exquisite. You enjoyed every little bite, savoring the flavors, and filling your stomach with enough food to keep you running till the following day at lunch.

Another hour had passed, and it was already 8 pm. It was already pretty dark outisde, and you wanted to walk a bit. You kept glancing out the window, noticing faint silhouettes and buildings in the distance.

Alex followed your gaze, then turned back to you. '' What is it?'' He asked concerned.

'' Oh nothing. I just really wanted to take a stroll, to walk some dark alleys and enjoy the Dublin vibes at night.'' You admitted dreamily.

'' Well, let`s do it.'' Alex said, standing up. '' Wait a second ok?'' He grabbed his phone and went up front, talking to the waiter who served you. When he came back, he helped you up, and then locked arms with you, putting his in his pocket.

'' Wait. We have to pay first.'' You pulled him back. He shook his head, smiling.

'' Already did. We can go.'' He continued pulling you towards the exit, while you were frowning, looking back and forth between Alex and the waiter, that was at his computer thingy.

''But-when?'' You were now outside, and you couldn`t help but let the chilly weather embrace your body.

'' When I left the table. I payed on my phone.'' He explained simply.

'' Ok. How much was my part?'' You said while you were zipping your fanny pack in search for cash, but Alex took your hand away, zipping your fanny pack back up, and shaking his head.

'' It`s on me.'' '' No!'' ''Yes. It was my idea to invite you. Where did you say you wanted to go?'' He changed the subject fast when he noticed you were trying to pay him back.

You huffed, and pointed a finger down a darker alley, which seemingly looked to be empty. He nodded his head at the alley, as if asking for a confirmation that was the one you pointed at, and when you nodded, he pulled his arm that was locked with yours out, and instead draping it over your shoulders, pulling you as close to him as posssible.

You guys started walking in a comfortable silence, the only sounds available coming from behind you from the main street, from which faint voices could be heard.

'' So… Why did you want to walk this way? Was there something in particular you wanted to see?'' He asked chuckling, squeezing your shoulder.

'' No… I just…enjoy walking down dark and empty streets. It`s so… I don't know. Peaceful I guess.'' You answered, while looking around you and taking notice of the buildings.

'' You do this often?'' He furrowed his brows. '' You walk at night, alone?''

'' Well… Yeah I do that a lot back home. Sometimes I even go out to listen to some music, or glance at the sky and observe constellations.''

'' Look, I know you are an adult and you decide what you want to do, but maybe you shouldn`t do that here.'' He stated, with a low and serious tone.

'' And why is that?'' You questioned, quizically.

'' Well because…'' He licked his lips in a stressful manner. '' I dont know what its like back there in you country, but here in Dublin, the streets get dangerous at night. That is why we always go out together clubbing or something. But none of us go out alone. It`s not… The safest.'' He took a breath of air. ''Especially not for someone like..you.'' He said lowly afraid you might misunderstand his words.

You choked out a laugh, and turned your head to the side to look at him. '' Someone like… Me? What do you even mean by that?'' You laughed, and locked eyes with him, challengingly.

'' Well… Haha.. Dont take it as an insult. I meant a girl like you. You are pretty, lets not be modest. Any guy would glance at you when you would be walking anywhere, but at night, there are people out there who might not have the best intentions and would try to harm you.'' Alex gave you a worried, showing complete honesty.

You didn`t even respond, but simply blushed and shook your head. But just then, ahead of you, you both noticed a small group of people coming in your direction. You could only see their shadowy silhouettes, but that was enough for Alex to move you both to one side of the street, opposite of the group, ensuring he was standing between you and them.

Tho it was a small gesture, you flushed, thinking how much of a nice and genuine guy he was. He paid for your dinner, he was being so kind and funny, you honestly didnt know if he wasnt faking this all just to sleep with you.

You kept walking, turning random streets, until it was pretty late at night, and you both agreed to head back, since the next morning was starting very early for you. He insisted on walking you back to the hotel, tho you reassured him youd be fine by yourself. He didnt give you time to argue, pulling you towards the hotel.

So now when you were finally in your hotel room, having taken your second shower of the day, you got in bed, ready to sleep. Right before you were about to close your eyes, your phone screen`s illuminated, letting you know you had a notification. Sleepily, you opened your phone and saw a message from Alex sent on instagram.

I had lots of fun. hope you did too good night see you tomorrow :))

You didn`t even open the app, but just smiled at the message and went to sleep, with a grin on your face.

The following day, same way, you got ready, met the girls down at the lobby and then you all left for the set. You stepped into the trailer, in a much more confident way than yesterday. You chirped a morning to Shaila and Peter, and then you got to setting up your tools. Shaila greeted you also, explaining that today was more serious, and that she will work on Alexs hair, and youll help her out, so you could see exactly what you`ll have to do in the future.

Not long after your arrival, the three Ragnarssons stepped into the trailer, first Jordan and then Marco and lastly Alex. The first two greeted you, while heading towards their seats, but when Alex stepped into the trailer, he immediately locked eyes with you, giving you a charming smile. He came to you and hugged you, kissing your right cheek when he pulled away.

You stood there motionless, trying to hide your blush. Alex grinned at you, and then snapped something at Marco in Danish when he kept teasing him.

Peter got to work on Jordan, and in the meantime, Shaila and yourself got to work on Alex. The middle aged woman explained as she went along, how she was envisioning his hair, showed you what products and in which order to use, and overall, you felt like you were back in beauty school, when all you had to do was sit next to the teacher and watch her work on the mannequin.

Only in this case, you actually got to help, holding hair sections, handing Shaila tools or products and such. It was a very nice experience. You felt really important, knowing you were helping in building a character`s visual side.

Alex was being his funny, extroverted self. He was joking around with Shaila and you as well, occasionally him softly grabbing your arm and rubbing it at certain times. One hour and a half later, you were done with him. He had intricate twists on his head, giving him a true Viking air. They looked really hot on him.

He got out of the chair, admired his hair closely in the mirror and then thanked you both.

'' Ah you women are amazing. My hair looks fabulous.'' He complimented, joking towards the end with a girly voice and posing funnily. You laughed at his antics.

Alex had to leave for the makeup and costume trailer, so with a respectful ( but exaggerated bow) he kissed you on the cheek once more, leaving you with the other guys who looked at you funny and started teasing you as well.

The day went by slightly faster, since you had so much more work to do. You were entrusted with doing hair for some extras, which was nice. You got compliments here and there, filling you with confidence.

The end of the day was approaching, and you couldn`t wait to get back to the hotel, so you could sit down and relax.

You were heading towards the parking lot, but felt someone running behind you. You felt strong hands encircling your waist, lifting you from the ground slightly. You yelled in surprise, but calmed down when you saw it was Alex, laughing acutely at you.

''What are you doing?'' He asked casually, falling into a walking rhythm with you.

'' Going home. You?''

'' Oh. Well same. Hey, you didn`t answer my message yesterday. Why is that huh?'' He interrogated you, poking your sides, causing you to squirm from how ticklish you were.

'' Oh-Al-St-o-p. I uhm.'' You struggled to say, since he kept poking and tickling you. '' Well. I was very tired. But I did read it. I just didn`t have the energy to text back. Sorry.'' You responded apologetically.

'' `S okay. Just wanted to make sure you were fine. Anyway, wanna go out tonight as well? Or you could come over to my place. I can tell Marco to leave the place so we can-''

'' Alex, what exactly are your intention?'' You interrupted him, getting straight to the point. '' I dont know what youre trying to do, but Ill tell you what I wont do, and that is having a fling. Or sleeping around.''

Alex frowned, confusion all over his face. '' Wait… WHAT?! N-.'' He sighed, frustrated. '' THat`s what you think I was trying to do?'' He chuckled bitterly. '' Wow… Thanks for thinking so low of me.'' He snapped, taking bigger and faster steps in front of you, getting ahead of you.

Realizing what you`ve done, with widened eyes you jogged towards him, grabbing his arm to stop him in his tracks. He turned around, with his jaw clenched and hurt yet angry eyes.

'' Im sorry. I didnt know what to think of it. You were so nice and amazing, it truly felt surreal, as if it was all an act.'' You explained, getting emotional. '' I`ve had… bad experiences with guys acting all nice and cute and then being complete dicks once they got what they wanted. And I was only trying to avoid getting hurt.'' Your eyes were getting watery from all the explaining, and at that, Alex softened his gaze.

'' I didn`t want to assume anything. But to me it seemed impossible that a guy like YOU, would ever be interested in someone like me. And I am terribly sorry for insulting you. '' You said sincerely, letting a tear drop fall onto your cheek.

Alex let his forehead rest on yours, getting really close to you. Raising both his palms, he cupped your face, using his thumb to wipe the cheek off your face. Kissing your forehead, he then nuzzle his nose against yours, as if silently asking you to stop apoligizing.

'' Youve got nothing to apologize for. Its not your fault you were surrounded by idiots. But please, just give me a chance.'' He begged.

You nodded slowly, announcing you wanted to forget the previous embarrassing moment.

Alex pulled slightly away, to be able to look at you, smirking. '' Did the other jerks give you such a loving and sweet kiss?''

Frowning, you looked at him with a tilted head. '' What kis-'' You were interrupted by his soft lips shutting you up. You closed your eyes, enjoying the moment. He left his lips lingering on yours for a few more seconds, but not daring to try to take it any further.

When he felt like it was enough, he pulled away, leaving you both out of breath. You smiled, looking at him and giggling. He joined in on your giggling, pulling you in a comforting side hug. You stayed hugging each other`s sides a few more minutes, until you saw the girls approaching, and other people coming into the parking lot. You pulled away, with difficulty, since Alex was trying to hold you there.

Finally freeing yourself, you waved at him goodbye, giving him a grin.

The next days went better and better. Each passing hour, it felt as if you were learning and constantly perfecting your skills, giving you more confidence. You were eventually allowed to do half of Alexs hair, Shaila still insisting shed have to go over your parts as well to perfect them.( perfectionist much).

Alex and you were being close every morning, him giving you a hug and a kiss on the cheek, but not taking it further in front of the others.

Time flew by so fast, that you stepped into Friday and realized, today you were going to find out who was going to stick around. Shaila texted you 5 to come a bit earlier in her trailer, where she was going to announce the winner.

'' Right. So, I want to preface by saying you are all talented. That is why you got here in the first place, which was already a big step. With that being said-'' She grabbed some papers, looking through them.

'' I want to thank you girls for having you here. You helped us a lot, as much as you also learned a bit of how the magic happens in these chairs.'' She used her free hand to slap the back of one of the chairs.

'' Alright. This was tough. But the final answer is…''

''Yn. Congratulations.'' She said in a neutral tone, clearly trying to hide her excitement.

You squealed in happiness, hugging Shaila and then each girl in return. You could tell they were looking at you bitterly, but you couldn`t do anything about that.

'' No hard feelings?'' You asked them.

They smiled sadly, hugging you one last time, before they were all escorted out. You barely had any time to let this new information sink in, when the young actors were already making their way inside. You locked eyes with Alex, grinning from ear to ear, nodding your head, silently telling him that you won.

He immediately understood your message, sprinting towards you and picking you up, spinning you softly. He laughed in happiness, and then with a newfound boldness, he attacked your lips. You gasped, taken completely by surprise, but nonetheless enjoying it.

The guys whistled, and when Alex pulled away, Marco patted him aggressively on the back, as a congratulation.

Shaila fully entrusted you this day to work on Alex alone, and when the three actors left the trailer, Alex rushing to plant another kiss on your lips, the woman pulled some brand new black t-shirts out of a cabinet, with the History Channel logo on them, handing you the clothes.

'' Welcome to the Vikings team, dear. We will need you around here.'' She greeted you officially, hugging you.

[bitchapalooza]

I’ve been trying to figure this shit out for years but wth did Veneziano and Romano represent before Italy really became, well, Italy??

From what I remember, before the Romans came, the Etruscans and many other peoples, like some Celts, resided in the area. But that’s totally separate from the Italy brothers. I highly doubt they even have a significant chunk of dna from these pre-Roman people. Maybe some, but certainly not a whole lot that really influences their genetic make up. In fact, it’s pretty clear Rome is where most of their dna come from, they 100% are direct relatives of Rome. Romano probably has a significant chuck of Greek dna, too, but regardless, Rome is his direct ancestor. I don’t know a whole lot about genetics though so correct me if I’m wrong. But yeah, they definitely don’t have a significant connection to the ancient Etruscans and has no ties to who/what they represented during the Roman Empire’s reign.

So who were they?

Going off of the screen cap below leads me to believe this is North Italy in his Renaissance era, 1350-1600– in the dub he even says he “feels so Renaissance”, not sure about the sub. So this pretty much confirms it for me. This is Renaissance [Northern] Italy.

Before this scene, Rome is apparently taking Veneziano away from France and HRE. Rome fell about three centuries prior to the formation of the Holy Roman Empire, though, so I’m not taking canon seriously of course. BUT I can kind of guess that perhaps they were trying to say that Veneziano was already around as the personification of any number of the Ancient peoples in the area when the Romans settled? Such as the Veneti, but wouldn’t that make Veneziano, France, and HRE just as old or possibly older than Rome despite being children? Nah, that feels silly tbh.

I’ve always thought of, in my delusional headcanon, the brothers were born at least a decade to a century before the fall of Rome and possibly represented very small, very specific things and gradually gained a new title after Rome’s death. I dunno. I seriously need to pick up where I left off 2 years ago re-research this stuff because it’s my biggest annoyance in this godforsaken media.

[tr1ck5]

I wasn't originally planning on writing any of this, but I've read so many wonderful and deeply personal love letters to FFVIII yesterday and today for its 25th anniversary that it kind of emboldened me to.

So here goes I guess, kind of somewhat personal wall of text about a ps1 game, under the cut. You've been warned!

Okay now I don't know how to start. You could say FFVIII came into my life at exactly the right time for me to absolutely imprint on it.

I remember playing the demo that came with a bunch of other demos from a PSN magazine; I'd watched my older brother play a lot of FFVII beforehand and I was enchanted by the story, graphics and characters, the music... Even though my understanding of english at the time was next to mediocre so I relied on him to explain things a lot. I was like... 8 or 9 then so loads of subjects and plot points went completely over my head but it didn't matter at all to me (It was kind of hilarious when I replayed it when I was older because I was like damn, this story is a LOT more convoluted/complicated than I remember wth??? Lmao)

When VIII finally released and I watched my brother play, I was now 10/11 and sometimes he'd play without me so I missed a lot of stuff (and it's rather funny because I remember looking at Squall and co at first and being like whoa, those adults have got their shit together so much and wow how I ever could have looked at Squall and thought that, is beyond me lmao) but when he was done with it I picked it up and played. And sucked. But it stayed with me through my teenage years, never too far.

I was then a lot more fluent in english and literature in general so it pretty much was my first real big 'story-driven' video game ever. I was so damn invested, and, perhaps most of all, I saw myself in Squall so damn much it was borderline uncanny. I think it's so comforting (or alarming depending on how you want to look at it lol) that that seems to be a common thing for all of us die-hard fans. We just 'get it', don't we?

I've... always been a 'weird' kid. That kid other kids somehow know to stay away from, because something is 'off' with them, before they learn how to mock and bully. And I was aware of my 'otherness' as much as them, for as long as I can remember. I never quite fit in, anywhere, no matter how hard I tried. I didn't have a lot of friends, and the very few I had I always kept at arms' length for self-preservation reasons. If I was never vulnerable, if they knew nothing deeper than surface-level stuff about me, they could never hurt me. And this way I wouldn't get too attached, so when they left it wouldn't hurt. Sound familiar?

Admittedly it's safe to assume that I had a somewhat fucked-up childhood (I mean, I wasn't an orphan forced to become a child soldier but still lol) as these behaviours didn't appear out of nowhere, and Squall's inner monologues and way of seeing things just resonated so much with me, I couldn't believe this guy was the hero that saved the day, despite all his traumas and anxiety... But he was. And he did. And his friends cared for him despite it all. And someone fell in love with him, flaws and all. He realized his way of life wasn't sustainable forever and he just... changed. But he wasn't unlovable. He wasn't irredeemable and broken! I cried so much the first time I finished that game. It felt so fucking unfair, I felt like I'd grown and matured right alongside Squall but as the credits rolled and the tv screen turned black I was met with my reflection; alone, in my room. Where were my friends, where was my Rinoa?

I'm an extremely private person. Sharing deep things about myself is extremely difficult for me and twice now I've come this close to erasing the entirety of this post. I have to fight the voice in my head that says this is irrelevant and useless at best, and dangerous to divulge so much personal info at worst. When I talk about personal things, even to the people closest to me, I start shaking and I feel nauseous and cold all over. Even today, right now as I'm typing this!

But this damn video game made me realize that I would never be happy and at peace if I was never honest and vulnerable. Because when you spend years around someone and know loads of things about them yet they know nothing about you, you're not a friend; you're an acquaintance. To love is to give a person the means to hurt you and trust them not to. You have to take that leap.

I eventually found my friends, and my Rinoa; I'm still having trouble trusting and opening up and relying on others but it got better, and it gets better still, and it's in part because of that. one. video game. Ain't that just crazy? A little bit, probably. Who cares.

I feel this wall of text of a post is all over the place and probably TMI but wow good on you for reading through it all lmao. Am I gonna regret posting this in the morning? Most definitely. But hopefully I have the strenght to leave it up. Hopefully someone somewhere can also relate, like I've related so much to all of your posts on this game! Ultimately I am deeply grateful and amazed by this community, we're the black sheeps, the underdogs, the often ill-understood... But I wouldn't want it any other way.

Happy 25th anniversary, Final Fantasy VIII.