#i can't even bring myself to type my thoughts on this here

[ken-dom]

∘₊✧ Lars & Bianca's first and last kiss — Lars collection 6/?

[jinwoosbabyboo]

“Will You Marry Me?"

How I imagine LADS Men would propose. This is part 2 of 2. I tried to do the sweet elegant writing, but that ain't me so here you go....

Xavier

Our lover boy Xavier is a literal prince. I feel as though he'd be very traditional with his proposal. The only unfortunate part is he can't ask for your fathers/family blessing because you know .... Anyway :)

He would definitely court you for a week even if you’ve already been together for over a year. The day of his proposal he would take you to a spot only he knows that has zero light pollution. Of course it’s deep in the forest.

MC: If I didn’t know any better I’d say you’re trying to kill me and hide my body Xavier: You have such creative thoughts MC: Seriously where are we going? Xavier: Somewhere special MC: So mysterious even after a year of dating

He’d bring you to a clearing that seemed like it was being lit up by a spotlight. It’s not though he chose to propose on a night with a full moon and clear skies so you could see how beautiful the stars are without all the city lights.

MC: It’s otherworldly Xavier: This was my favorite place to come when I needed clarity MC: Why didn’t you show me sooner? Xavier: I wanted to save it for a special day MC: oh what are you going to propose or something?

You’d be laughing and boom he pulls a ring out of his pocket shutting you right up.

MC: Oh shit! You’re really proposing Xavier: Yes im really proposing

His speech is so sweet it could give you cavities not only would he emphasize how much he loves you he’d let you know just how much he is solely yours. Even if you were to one day forget him and how much he loves you he would still always be yours and would do anything to keep you safe & most of all happy.

Xavier: My lady will you marry me? MC: I want nothing more

He might’ve been sweet and soft spoken during his proposal but that shy boy facade went out the window when you two got back home.

Sylus

It’s canon that Sylus gets nervous when he wants to ask you out. So just imagine how nervous he is getting ready to propose! He already constantly gifts you pretty gems and the gifts just keep increasing over the course of 3 months.

He second guesses himself thinking you may say no so he keeps putting it off but continues to shower you in gifts, quality time, full body massages, shopping sprees, dinner dates, lunch dates, you name it he’s doing it, you want it he got it. He’d be spoiling you so much you’d have to sit him down and ask him what’s going on. He would dismiss your concerns of course.

MC: Are you guys leaving for a while? Kieran: Why do you ask? MC: Sylus has been acting weird I feel like he’s about to disappear again Luke: That was one time and boss only did that because you asked him to leave you alone MC: I know but I’m worried now Luke: Relax miss hunter you’re overthinking

The twins would indeed gaslight you while Sylus worked up the nerve to propose. When he finally has the nerve to do it he goes all out. I’m talking he'd rent out the most exquisite restaurant money can buy. A whole staff at your beck and call. He'd wine and dine you with delicious food and expensive wine. By the time dessert comes you'd want answers.

MC: You're leaving me aren't you Sylus: Jumping to conclusions are we? MC: I'm serious Sylus you haven't been yourself lately you're worrying me Sylus: I guess this is the part where I explain myself

With two snaps of his fingers the twins would rush out; Kieran placing a giant box bouquet of Angel Trumpet flowers in your arms and Luke placing a crown on your head before rushing out leaving the two of you alone.

MC: What's this? and what am I a Princess? Sylus: You are and I'd love to change your title to Queen MC: Stop are you....

I don't picture Sylus giving a long winded speech. I feel like he would be the type to write it down so you could cherish his words forever.

Sylus: Will you marry me Miss Hunter? You can say no if- MC: Of course I'll marry you

Yet again I'm tackling this man as soon as he slips that ring on. Need to be in his arms immediately. Expeditiously.

Zayne & Rafayel here…

[juniperdugong]

Relationship quirks Maknae Line ver.

Aka habits I can see the boys doing in a relationship || 95s || 96s || 97s || Maknae line ||

Seungkwan Brings home food

IT DOES NOT MATTER if you have or have not eaten, are starving, or have a full belly! Boo Seungkwan is GOING. To. Bring. Home. Food. For. You. Won't take no for an answer! And not only did he keep snacks on himself before you guys started dating but even more so now. He is such a sweetheart who will never allow you to go hungry.

Honestly, he's hypocritical in that he'll start going on a diet but the minute that you say that you need to go on a diet - the gates of hell break loose in your home. Completely outraged that you won't eat at least a bite of what he's offering you. Pouts and acts like you just told him that you want to break up or something worse. The type to say, "FINE THEN I'LL EAT IT MYSELF", then proceeds to give you the nastiest stare-down of your life as he takes a bite. (If you don't concede to his little charade quick enough this WILL become a silent treatment game)

Vernon Sends pictures of himself

Lowkey, you become a photo storage for this man. Sends a photo to you every single time he thinks of you, which is a lot more often than one might think. Is constantly sending you pics of random things he's found and can't send to anyone else. The one constant is his damn face that never changes in any of the pics despite the angle changes. It's gotten to the point where you've had to ask how he does it but he just shrugs.

Every question you ask is answered in either a meme or a photo of him looking like his regular deadpan self, no words either and if you ask for clarification he just sends another photo of him looking confused as hell.

This really is his own special brand of clinginess. You'll hear a message notification from him, open it, and it's his face at the most unflattering angle... He's literally lying on your stomach right at this moment. No explanation, even if you ask he doesn't give one.

Dino Assumes you're following him everywhere

The opposite of Wonwoo's habit lol. Dino sees absolutely no reason why you shouldn't be by his side at all times. You're his number one comfort, so why wouldn't you be with him 24/7? Weird that you would even think he'd let you leave. He has a spider sense for when you're moving too far away from him and he will immediately grab and bring you towards him.

More than the physical though, this dude will not allow you to be by yourself. If he's going on tour, congrats! You are also going on tour! There's a company trip? Great! You're a part of the company now. It may even get to the point of him downright refusing to go places if he knows there won't be space for you.

"I need to go outside and get some fresh air." "Okay, babe." "I said...I need to go outside and get some fresh air." "Alright, hun, I'll be right here." *Genuinely tweaking out at this point, gets up, and grabs your hand. Dragging you with him.* "You could've just asked me to follow you." *Leaning his head on your shoulder, still slightly upset* "You're supposed to know! I need you near me whenever possible."

A/N: Super sorry that this one came a day late, lovelies! But it's here now and I absolutely adore these boys. I think my favorite of all the habits is probably Woozi's (I'm quite literally biased) but the one that I'm most like is Vernon. Wbu??? Please reblog and comment! Let me know ur thoughts in my asks. Oh! And my requests are opennnnn! Have a great one, babes!

TAGLIST (open): @bemybabiibish @bath1lda

[ddejavvu]

hello!! i hope you’re doing well ❤️ i just read your hotch fic where he sneaks his wife and jack into the hotel room and i was wondering if you’d write something similar where jack is with jess or something and someone from the team catches hotch and reader going into his room except they can’t tell it’s reader and think hotch is cheating and they love the reader and can’t stand the idea of letting them get cheated on so maybe they confront him or call reader while reader is with hotch to tell her or something funny, whatever you find fitting. thank you if you get to this ❤️

i actually fucking adored this idea thank you <333

--

Emily's always taken Hotch for an honorable man. He's chivalrous, opening doors for the ladies on the team and walking them to their cars to be sure that they're safe in parking lots. It's instilled in his very being to be kind to women, so when she sees him trying to cover up a head of blue-dyed hair as he fumbles with the lock on his hotel room, she's perplexed.

That's not you. You don't have blue hair. But Hotch's arm is around her waist, and she's leaning into his side. His hand is more than generous over her skin, even slipping into the hemline of her shorts, and Emily's blood boils.

Aaron's got a grin on his face that she can just barely see without being seen herself, and he sounds all-too-happy to be leading another woman into his hotel room after hours when he chuckles at her advances. She rushes for the bed and Emily has to duck back into her room so as not to be seen when the woman rights herself on the bed, and there's something sickly brewing in her gut as she shuts her door again. She no longer has an appetite to raid the vending machine like she'd planned, so she heads back to her twin bed, hand digging into her pajama pants to retrieve her phone.

Spencer' who's occupying the second bed in the room, looks up inquisitively from his book, "I thought you were going to the vending machine, what happened?"

"Hotch just let some girl into his room. I mean- like, he brought her in, he had his hands all over her and she ran to the bed."

Reid's brows rise towards his scruffy hairline, pink lips downturned, "It wasn't Y/N?"

"She had blue hair," Prentiss shakes her head, "I'm gonna tell her."

"I want to help," Spencer rises from his bed, quickly crossing the room to her own, "I don't want to make her sad, but we can't keep it from her."

Emily nods, but Spencer keeps talking, "I... I can't believe Hotch would do something like that."

"Neither can I." Emily admits, clicking on your text thread. It's heavily decorated with hearts both in the messages and your contact name, and she hopes yours doesn't break when you find out what your husband's been doing behind your back.

Y/N, she types, I don't know how to tell you this, and I wish someone else would, because I don't want to be the one to break your sweet heart. But I just saw Aaron bring some blue-haired girl into his room, and if I'm being honest with you, I think they're having sex. I'm SO sorry honey, I wish I could do something, but I couldn't live with myself if I didn't tell you. Please call me and tell me what's going on with you, I don't want you to be alone all night, and PLEASE don't slip away if you and Aaron don't work things out. For the record I'm rooting for you to dump his sorry ass, but I know you'll need time to work things out. All I ask is that you don't shut us out, honey, please don't let him change the way you feel about us.

P.S Reid is here too and we're both here if you want to talk. We can face-time and we'll be there for you as best we can, baby.

And also you can sleep at my place.

Or Spence's. He says he can sleep on the couch if you want his bed.

I'm so sorry, Y/N, we love you.

Emily can't have pressed send on the last text ten seconds ago before there's a series of urgent knocks on the door. Her guard is up immediately, and she almost considers ignoring it because she's sure it's Hotch coming to tell her off for exposing him. She figures you must have called him, upset, and he's here to ask her to lie for him.

The knocks don't stop, though, and Reid's the one that marches for the door, face set in a glare that's unusually menacing for him. He's deduced the same series of events, but when he swings the door open with as much sass as he can muster, his posture stiffens with shock.

Aaron is on the other side of the door, but you're standing in front of him, hair bright blue, face sheepish.

"Hi Em," You smile at her, then at Reid, "Spence. I was going to join you all for breakfast tomorrow and unveil it, but- um, I think now's a good time to tell you that I dyed my hair blue."

"Oh." Emily hums, mouth hung slightly open, "So it's- it was you."

"it was me," You nod, "But thank you for telling me. I'm glad I can count on you. Both of you," Your eyes flit to Spencer, who's equally astonished as he inspects your new hair dye.

"Oh, that means-" Emily's face wrinkles suddenly, looking at your waist that Aaron's got a hold of as he stands behind you, "Gross, you two were gonna- in the hotel!"

Spencer groans, rushing away from the door and retreating back to his bed where his novel lies.

"It's after hours!" You insist, "It's not like we were doing it in the precinct on government time. We're adults, Emily."

"We're adults too, y'know. With work in the morning. We can't be kept up all hours of the night by your racket! Just go get it over with," She grimaces, "And- hey! Try to get into your room this time before reaching your hand down her pants, perv!"

[madamechrissy]

Take Me Home Tonight

♡ ♡ Pairings ♡ ♡ Law Professor Satoru Gojo x Student Fem Reader

♡ ♡ Warnings ♡ ♡ MDNI- Gojo is like 29 here, reader is like 22 or 23. Nothing too crazy. But is Professor/teacher forbidden type love. In this chap- Fingering, cunnilingus, blow jobs, explicit sex, rough sex, breeding kink, mentions of violence, descriptions of violence (ANGSTY CHAP)

♡ ♡ Word Count ♡ ♡ 11k

♡ ♡ Summary ♡ ♡ After passing your LSATs, your friends take you out to unwind. You never go out, so you are awkwardly agree, and you end up in the arms of a super hot man named Satoru. You end up screaming Satoru's name as he drops down on his knees before you, only to lose him in the club. All you have is his first name. Two months later, in your Criminal Law class, your heart stops. Your teacher? Professor Gojo. Or as you soon call him, Professor Dickhead. You can't fuck up your law school, and he won't fuck up his career, not just because he makes you wet in class, no, he's a dick. Right?

That pout and blue eyes don't wreck you, right? - Lawyer AU (If you wanna be tagged in updates let me know 💓)

Chapter 8 - Masterlist

Chapter 9

Books are scattered all over Satoru’s dining room table, as you both are nibbling on food together, papers and pictures, documentation and even… weapon photos, evidence photos. How Satoru and you could both eat while looking at these things really made you both a little questionable, but in a way you feel so comfortable, with your years of eating while watching true crime.

Satoru Gojo is your person.

“Okay, look here, see the wound marks?” Satoru asks, sipping on a drink and leaning over you, his one arm around your waist as the other sets down the glass and points to bruising on the victim’s face.

“Oh.. it’s left-handed isn’t it?” He nods, sighing.

“Smart little brat.” He kisses the top of your head briefly, before bending over to snatch up the other document, with another victim. “Now look at her.”

“Oh shit… left-handed. Wait, there's two victims?”

“No. Two different cases.” He sighs, sitting next to you and frowning, so serious then, you gently rub his back then. “So, I haven’t told you my worst fear.”

“What is it, Satoru?” You murmur, and he looks at you with those beautiful blue eyes for a moment.

“Well, now my worst fear is losing you.” He caresses your cheek, and you melt, planting a kiss on his brow gently, sighing.

“It’s one of my new fears as well.”

“But my original fear? Putting someone innocent up, and letting someone awful go. Considering I’m a defense attorney typically, it’s the latter that haunts my dreams.” He rakes a hand through his hair, and you place your head on his shoulder, brushing your fingers down his back.

“I imagine that’s a horrible fear. And unavoidable in some situations.” He nods a bit stiffly.

“It’s the worst, and I’m worried it happened.” You blink a bit, trying to follow what he was talking about, and his fists clench at his side. “I lose myself with you. Which is beautiful, but when I was alone last night I was thinking of this case, and similarities to the first high case I did… and I think it’s fucked up.”

“Do you think you missed something, Satoru?” You gently ask, and you hate how sad he looks, forlorn.

“I do. There was a case where I saw no way to do anything but get this kid life sentence, because the possibility of parole is fifteen years, right? Better than a needle in the arm.”

“Very true. But you think…”

“Yeah, I had a feeling he was innocent, deep down in my heart, but how could I have done anything? It was all stacked against the kid. He had a shit record, he even had assault in the past, but he was young, younger than you. I thought I was being the best to him I could.” He slams his fist down, and you tense a bit, grabbing his drink and bringing it to his lips.

You watch as he gulps down some of it, sighing. “Satoru don’t beat yourself up over this, isn’t this still a hunch?”

“Nah, baby girl, I’m pretty damn sure I’ve seen this before. It’s been driving me insane. And now I have to defend this person who could actually have been killing for who knows how long!? Fuck me.” He’s slamming his hands down again, turning and walking away, sighing.

“Okay so let’s think logically here…” You pull back out the files, taking a sip of the drink yourself as Satoru is pacing. He’s wearing his dress shirt loose, his chest showing, tie askew, belt slung off and trousers hanging low. He’s gorgeous but you need to focus on this. “The man you put up, he was left-handed, yeah?”

“Yeah, he was.”

“But the women look identical, and the attack is damn near the same. So we have to think, what could connect these two men? Could they have been at the same place at the same time, to meet these girls?” Satoru pauses, then snatches up the bottle of vodka on the table, pouring some in both of your glasses.

“Huh. You’re smart as fuck.” You flush under the praise, and look at him just drinking the vodka without anything.

“Thank you. Satoru… I need a mixer.” He smirks finally, rolling his pretty eyes and batting his white lashes.

“What a baby.”

“Says the man who drinks chocolatinis!”

“You started that, brat. Mmkay, I have mixers, come on let's go find ya something.” You hop up from the table, taking in Satoru’s lush home. It was beautiful, spotless and modern, gray walls with white crown moulding, all the fixtures brand new and beautiful. His bar was impressive, black marble counter and high stools, pretty soft fairy lights hanging.

He opens the black cabinets, pulling out a bright green bottle then. “Ooh, that looks yummy!”

“You like sour apple?” You nod, and Satoru is expertly mixing you up a pretty bright drink, you sip it moaning.

“A girl could get used to this treatment.” Satoru comes to you then, hands on your waist, leaning low, and you inhale his clean scent, intoxicating you. Your body instinctively arches to him.

“You trying to move in already, huh?” You giggle, shaking your head.

“No, silly. That would be too fast, yeah?”

“I’d let you. Aw, you’re bright red.” He teases you, and your entire body lights up at his words.

“You’re so crazy, Satoru Gojo.” You say softly, leaning up on your tip toes, and he leans down, kissing you gently, you taste the liquor mixed with his minty breath, feel his firm lips on yours. “Mmm, didn’t say I never would though.”

“When you’re not in my class huh? We’ll get married too.”

“Satoru!”

“What? You wouldn’t?”

“You’re talking nonsense.”

“Am I? You probably doodled it already.”

“Did not!” You both laugh then, but the tension is there, the way Satoru casually mentions weddings, babies, moving in. Like it’s nothing. “Satoru, it's hard to know what you really mean. Like the baby thing…”

“What, I meant that. I’d love to get you pregnant.” His words hit something primal, something that makes your tummy clench, his whisper reverberating through every inch of your body.

“The school would love that.” He scoffs, rolling his eyes, hand sliding over your tummy then, making you tremble.

“Fuck them, but you wouldn’t show till after you’re out of my class.” He grins, his white teeth glinting.

“Stop that! Staying on the pill for now.”

“You’re boring.” He’s pouting and you just giggle.

“I have a career you know.”

“Good, have the baby with us all the time. Lawyer by age ten. Our genetics would be killer, yeah?”

“You’re so ridiculous. But yeah.” You both chuckle then again, and you take a sip of your drink, lips puckering just a bit as it hits you. “Something about that vision makes my ovaries ache.”

“You’re ovulating. Perfect time.” He chimes out in a sing-song voice, you bite back a moan, sipping your drink.

“You don’t need to tell me. I think I went insane in the limo.” He’s grinning like the damn mad hatter now, as vivid memories rush through you of earlier.

“You took it all. I think you have sucked dick before mine! And that makes me unreasonably jealous.” You roll your eyes now, snorting and shaking your head.

“Not at all, I just apparently need to be the best at everything.” You take another sip grinning.

“You really are. I don’t think I’ve had someone make me cum so quick, fuck it’s embarrassing.”

“You’re kinda easy, Toru.” He glares and you just grin more deviously, as he picks you up and sits you on the bar, running his hands up and down your thighs, creating a pattern of goosebumps everywhere he touches. You gently run your hands down his shoulders, rubbing the stiff muscles and making him moan. “Turn, I’ll rub your neck, you’re crazy tense.”

“What’d I do to deserve you?” His casual compliments kill you, every minute you spend with Satoru Gojo makes you just fall deeper. Your fingers press into his stiff neck, making him moan, leaning back against you. “Fuck that feels good.”

“I’ll rub your back any time, Toru. As long as you rub mine.”

“I’ll probably just get horny and fuck you.” You laugh at that, breathy and soft, planting kisses on his neck, pressing your fingers deeper in little circles, trying to work on a knot there.

“Fine, you can just eat me out.” He groans, hands on your thighs tightening as he leans back more against you.

“I’ve been doing that since I met you.” His husky voice has you dripping against your panties, and you try to focus on rubbing deeper, loosening his tense body as much as you can. “It’s my favorite thing to do.”

“It’s my favorite thing.” You whisper in his ear, watching him tremble a bit, grip tightening, while your hands press deeper, massaging between his shoulder blades now, where most of his tension is. “You’re really tense here.”

“I will pay you to massage me every day. Oh and to dress slutty.” He sips your drink now. “Ooh yummy.”

“You could hire a professional!”

“Nah. I’ll just pay you. With diamonds.” You peek at your bracelet, shaking your head. “Then I’ll just buy you another bracelet.”

“You can get me a bead. That’s it.”

“I’ll sneak things on you in your sleep. Then it’ll be rude to turn it down.” You can’t stop the smile on your face at his words.

“Maybe.” You say softly, continuing to rub lower now, feeling his spine just pop then, and he groans. “There it is.”

“I’ll marry you now, woman.”

“Stop that, do you know what you do to my mentality? So casually.” His hands slide down your calves now, as he tilts his head side to side.

“What? It’s true.”

“You can’t just say things like that. Already feel like I’m dreaming.” Another pop, as he cracks his neck, becoming putty in your hands.

“Fine, brat, I won’t propose yet if you’re such a baby about it.”

“You so were not gonna!”

“Wanna bet?”

“Satoru!” You press really hard and he groans again.

“Never mind, marry me.” You both laugh and then you continue rubbing down his back, to the mid part of it, feeling every stupidly strong muscle through his dress shirt, watching the soft fabric stretch as you press.

“So, my thoughts on that case…”

“Buzz kill!”

“I know, but it’s bothering me now.” Satoru moans again as your hands knead into his aching back. “Any clubs they could have been at together? Both of those women were… um, escorts yeah?”

“High class too, yeah. I had an informant that worked with them on the first case, but no way she’d remember that far back. It was six years ago.”

“It wouldn’t hurt to ask, though. Maybe we see if she remembers seeing this guy you’re defending? But in that case, you still have to defend him. Fuck.”

“You’re annoyingly smart.” He glares back at you as he speaks. “You remind me of me in law school.”

“High praise.” Your hands are going lower now, and he’s leaning so close it’s hard to move your arms, so instead your hands slide down his shoulders, wrapping his chest and leaning your chin on his neck. “We should get with her and ask while we’re doing the case.”

“You really wanna meet her? See these things… I don’t know how involved you want to be.”

“I need to see it all, Satoru. I really do. If this is going to be what I do I have to know what I’m in for, good, bad or horrible.”

“This girl was assaulted too, but she couldn’t see him. What if it’s the fucking guy I’m defending!?” You snuggle closer, though his back was less tense his entire body was not.

“How do you act so happy with all this happening?” You ask it softly, and he turns his head to you, nuzzling yours.

“I have to.”

“Not with me you don’t.” He exhales, turning then, hands sliding up your thighs, eyes boring into yours, pain on that beautiful face mixed with clear affection, mirroring your own. You gently brush his hair back, and his eyes flutter shut, lips parting as he sighs.

“That’s the most addicting thing about you, I don’t have to pretend.” Your heart thuds in your chest, and you pull him closer, planting a kiss on his chin, heart brimming with affection.

“You never have to pretend around me. You have a lot of responsibility.”

“Yeah, you do too already. I’m putting a lot on you.”

“No, no I want this, okay? I won’t let studies slack, I’m a nerd.” He smirks, planting a soft kiss on your nose.

“You are my little nerdy student, huh? Ace every test.”

“Sure do.”

“I don’t wanna talk about the case anymore tonight. Let’s revisit it tomorrow, yeah? I’m suddenly realizing my student needs some attention.” His voice gets husky, his eyes dilating as he’s slipping your dress up your thighs, and you manage a little nod, then he’s picking you up, like you’re nothing, carrying you to his room.

You’re in Satoru Gojo’s room, huh?

His room is just a little disorganized, a bit unlike the rest of the house, you see his ties hanging on a lamp, his fancy sunglasses just tossed on the sleek black dresser, his bed is a little wild, rumpled and unmade. You peek around curiously, and he’s kissing down your neck, his room alone is twice the size of your dorm.

“Like the room, brat?” He teases, and you nod, leaning back to kiss him deeply, hands enwrapping in his silky white locks.

“It’s more you than the rest of the house.” You murmur between kisses, he hums, easing you down on the bed now, and it’s so comfy you could die, plush and sinking a bit as you sit.

“You mean because the cleaner doesn’t come in here?” He’s pushing your skirt up, pressing you onto the bed, kissing your thighs, his hands sliding your panties off inch by inch. It’s hard to breathe, as you’re consumed by him, by his presence, taking you over with every touch.

“Yeah, it just seems more… Gojo.” He chuckles, planting sweet kisses on your thighs, hot breath making you tremble. “Mnh…”

“We had a deal, yeah? Massage for pussy eating.”

“I also said massage!”

“I’ll massage her with my tongue.” He’s buried himself then, his mouth hot and wet on your pussy, and you’re gripping the soft blankets under you, your eyes rolling back in your head as he licks and kisses and sucks, his tongue flicking against your clit in a way that has you seeing stars.

“Satoru! Oh my god!” You moan out his name, your hips bucking up to meet his mouth, and he just holds you down, his grip firm as he continues to worship you, his tongue sliding up and down your slit, making you gush all over his perfect face.

“So yummy, you’re such a good girl.” He whispers, leaning back,  his hands sliding up to cup your breasts under your top. You’re shaking, damn near hyperventilating as you stare down at his beautiful eyes, dilated and bright to the point his eyes alone bring you closer.

“Fucking love you.” You whisper, it’s the first time since your confession that you’ve said it, and fuck it feels so good. Satoru groans, planting a sloppy kiss on the hood of your clit, then sucking on the puffy lips, little smacks filling the room as you cry out, back arching in pleasure.

“And I love you. Hmm am I talking to the pussy or you? You’ll never know.” He says with a smirk, and you giggle before he’s back to devouring you, groaning and making a vibrating sensation you can’t fucking take.

“S’good Toru- ngh f-fuck!” You scream out, you’re so close to cumming, and you know he knows it because he’s looking up at you, watching your reactions, and it’s so fucking hot. Your hands grip his hair, bucking your hips up. “Cumming!”

He just moans, circling your clit with the tip of his tongue, and you’re falling apart, cumming with a scream, your body arching off the bed, and he doesn’t stop, even then, no he’s drinking you up. You’re whining now, oversensitive as he licks you through your orgasm into another, his hands sliding to your waist, gripping you so tight you feel him pressing on your ribs, hands enwrapping you.

“Toru! Oh my- mmm!” You’re senseless, screaming as your head shoves further in the bed, you can’t fucking take it, thighs threatening to close, but he doesn’t pause, or even breathe no he’s just drinking you up, and you’re shattering again. “Toru, enough, enough! Ah!” 

You cum all over his face so hard you’ve soaked him completely, and he’s just groaning, as he laps you up with little flicks of his talented tongue, smacking kisses as he cleans up your mess. You’re so embarrassed at how much there is too, as your legs are shaking and he’s finally leaning up to breathe, his face is shimmering with how much you’ve came.

“Toru…” You swipe some of your arousal off his chin, and he smacks your hand away, leaning on top of you, licking his lower lip. “That’s embarrassing… too much.”

“What? It’s so fucking hot. Stop that.” He’s on top of you, his hard chest on your soft breasts, weight on you so inviting, and you cling to him, still clothed both of you, and he’s so hot you’re just dripping again. “I love how much you cum for me, it lets me know you like it.”

“But that much!?” He chuckles softly, caressing your face softly and studying you. Your hands slide up to his chest, feeling his heart thudding on your palm, pressure in your tummy as your cunt pulses with aftershocks.

“Yes, that much, or more. You always taste so good. It was what made me lose my shit that night.” He kisses you then, and you lick your honeyed arousal, moaning against his full lips, as he sinks you both deeper into the bed.

“I still can’t believe I did that. Yes, stranger, eat me out in a bathroom.” You murmur, and you both grin at each other. “Fuck it feels a long time ago huh?”

“It’d be much longer if I didn’t see you again. Fuck I kept going back to the same bar.” He’s flushed a bit, but it makes you ache more, hips raising to grind on his hard cock between your thighs over his clothes.

“You did!?” You blink rapidly, taking a shaky breath as his presence consumes you, his long body overtaking yours, his eyes getting hooded in desire, just like yours were, as his words sink in.

“I did. Embarrassing huh.”

“N-no… I did too, Satoru.”

“You did!?”

You blush now, nodding, clinging to his dress shirt with your little hands. “Of course I tried. I’m surprised neither of us ran into each other?”

“Maybe I was just meant to have you torture me in class.” His voice drops down to a whisper now, and he leans up on his arms. “I need my student naked. Now.”

“Yes, Professor.” He’s sliding your top off in seconds, and you eagerly unbutton his dress shirt, then he’s unsnapping your bra, freeing your breasts and groaning as he does, pulling you against his bare chest. “You’re so gorgeous, Toru.”

“I know.” You snort at that, and then he grins, sliding his hands up to cup your breasts, kissing down them, making you cry out in pleasure, cunt just wetter now. “You’re gorgeous, Miss Brat.”

“Your prettiest student, hmm?” You whisper, he nods eagerly, before sucking the sensitive peaks of your breasts into his hot, eager mouth. “Ah, fuck! Mnh!”

“The sounds you make, mmm you kill me, brat.” He’s unzipping the side of your skirt now, eyes devouring your body hungrily. He makes you feel so confident, so sexy and beautiful. You whine out just from his gaze, like he’s touching you with his hands, but soon he does, trailing down as he slides your skirt down, and you are unbuttoning his pants, biting your lower lip.

“Your body, ugh.” He smirks, wiggling his brows.

“I know, I’m perfect hmm?” You roll your eyes but it’s true, as you touch every line on his gorgeous frame, every muscle, abdomen, line… the perfect pale skin that is hot to the touch.

“You’re perfect, Satoru. And you clearly have a praise kink, judging by that.” You look down between you both as his cock is rock hard in his boxers.

“That’s part praise kink, part you’re touching me, part you’re beautiful. Take your pick.” He snatches your hand, shoving it down, and you grip him, watching as his cheeks suck in, his white lashes swooping low as he groans softly.

“Let’s get these off.” Satoru has got them off in a blink of an eye, his cock hard and hot in your hand, you stroke him up and down slowly, swirling your hand as you do, watching his pretty face as he moans, grabbing you by your hair and kissing you then. “So hard, aren’t you?”

“Tease.” You just smile innocently, swiping the bit of pre cum that’s started to leak out of his pretty pink tip, and he’s huffing, so sexy, until he lets out the whimper that drives you insane, and then he’s got your legs up, dragging you by your hips. “I’ll teach you to tease.”

“Oh yeah? Teach me, Professor.”

“You’re such a brat, you know my weaknesses and exploit them! You’ll be such a good lawyer.” He flashes a wolfish grin, but when he’s pressed at your entrance you start whining, getting slippery as he barely presses, arching up for more.

“Please, Toru…” Your words hit him instantly, he’s pressing in, sliding even deeper in your tight entrance.

“How can I say no to anything you ask? With that pretty face. Oh… fuck, you’re tight… shit…” He’s groaning as he slides in fully, and your walls are clutching tight around him, he clings to you tightly, eyes slamming shut momentarily. “Fuck, should’ve fingered you, damn it.”

“Too tight huh?” You’re giggling but he scowls at you, slamming in your cunt then, and you feel so full, so much pressure you can’t take it, as he starts stroking, way faster and harder than he usually would, killing you. “Fuck!”

“Learn your lesson, brat.” He’s slamming his lips down, kissing you hungry and desperate, and he’s got your legs higher than you think they should go, pressing them high until they’re on your breasts, making it hard to breathe. You whine out, hips bucking, and he’s smirking. “Aww you okay baby? Can’t take it?”

Satoru Gojo was a sweet, caring, amazing man… until he got that competitive streak, mainly in fucking. Then? He’s a whole demon.

“F-fuck you, I can take it.” You whisper out the answer, but when Satoru’s big hands are cupping your face, and he’s staring at you like that? Your brows knit together, your teeth clicking shut as you feel such intensity you can’t handle it, you’re cumming all over his cock and he exhales, pausing, thumbs caressing your cheeks as his tip grinds too deep inside you.

“Fuck, I love you.” He moans out the words, as he’s tensing, his movements slowing down, rolling his hips. “You’re gonna make me cum quick, fuck.”

“I love you.” He cries out softly, hands now firm on your thighs, as he gently rocks in his hips so deep you feel like you’re gonna fall apart.

“What do you do to me?” His eyes flutter shut, those long white lashes over his cheeks, casting shadows in the soft light of the room over his perfect features, and he’s barely moving, forehead on yours. You cling to him desperately, nails digging into his strong back, and he’s throwing his head back, moaning. “Cum with me, baby girl, can’t even last. Brat.”

You manage a breathless giggle, nodding, your walls fluttering around his thickness. “Please, please… cum in me, Toru.”

“Fill you up.” He’s just whispering though, as he pumps in and out, and you feel him pulsing inside of you, and your body reacts, and you’re falling apart around him, cumming right with him, everything fading but him.

It’s just him.

“F-fuck… take all of it. Good girl.” Your back arches as everything washes through you, every nerve ending lit up as your cunt is pulsing around him. He slams his lips down on yours, finally easing your thighs down, they’re sore as he rubs them gently, pumping life into them as he pumps all his cum in your pussy.

“S-Satoru… love you. Mnh.” You whisper, and he moans, kissing you again and again, deeply and passionate, tongues entwining, messy as you’re dripping down his length, down your thighs, and he leans back, looking down at you. Your hand slides up to caress his face, feeling the sharp cheekbone with your thumb.

“Stop making my bust quick, little brat.” He says, and you just giggle, shaking your head.

“I came though, a few times.”

“You get off on making me cum like a teenager. Be honest.”

“Mmm… maybe?” He tickles your waist then, as he eases out, and you giggle at it, eventually hopping up, completely naked and smacking him with one of his heavy, fancy pillows. He grins like a psycho.

“Oh, it’s fucking on. War.” He smacks the fuck out of you with the pillow, nearly knocking you over, so you pout, and then he frowns, coming up to you, to check you, only for you to grin and smack him with the pillow even harder.

“Hah, fell for it!”

“You’re gonna pay for it.” He gets you again until he’s got you pinned back under him, and he’s grinning down at you, you puff your breath to get the feathers out of your face. “Fuck you’re pretty.”

“You’re pretty, Satoru.” He’s kissing you till you're breathless, and then he pauses, leaning up a bit and studying you carefully. “What’s wrong?”

“Huh… I’m really worried now. You look like one of those girls, your hair, your eyes even… I don’t know if I can bring you.”

“What!? I’m going!”

“But I can’t fucking risk it, what if this guy-”

“You’ll keep me safe.”

He exhales, but you see the worry on his features. “Of course I will, but I just didn’t put it together until now. You’re the same age, obviously not the same profession… but…”

“Satoru I will be fine. I want to help you. We will figure out the possible motivations, okay?” Satoru sighs, caressing your face gently, anguish in his blue eyes making them darken.

“I just fucked you and now I’m worrying about this case.”

“So what? It’s important to you. Do you wanna do more research?” He sighs, nodding then, and soon you’re sliding on your pajama’s you’ve brought, and you two are back out in the living room, pouring over the papers, but you’re yawning a bit after about an hour or so. Satoru notices, planting a kiss on your cheek.

“I’m sorry baby girl, I wanna cuddle with you and relax but now that I’m thinking of you at risk it’s gonna drive me fucking crazy.” He runs a hand through his white silky locks, missing them up further.

“Satoru, I don't mind at all. I want to help anyway I can.” You stifle another yawn, and he looks at you tenderly, you see he’s sleepy too, his eyes a little red.

“You worked today and had classes. Go get some shut eye, Miss Brat. I promise I’ll come to bed soon.”

“Just a little longer.” You murmur, leaning on his shoulder then, as he’s typing on his little black laptop, pouring over more papers now, the clicking of the keys mixed with Satoru’s breathing is oddly even more comforting.

“Baby you’re drooling.” He teases in a few, and you blink a little, bleary eyed as you shake your head.

“No… Toru, m’good… those girls-”

“Don’t let it overwhelm you, please.” You shake your head again, your eyelids feel so heavy.

"We need to look into the escort agency, Toru. Maybe there's something in their past, something that connects these women to each other and to the victims." He smiles at you, holding you against his side, kissing your cheek again.

“Already on it. You’re so smart, you know that?” You smile at the compliment, and soon he’s grabbed a blanket, and you’re in his arms, half asleep on his lap. “You can just sleep on me, I’ll carry you to bed later.”

You hum happily, snuggling up to his hard, hot body, and he pulls you close, arms around your waist, continuing to click away, and your face buried in his neck, he wraps the blanket tighter. You feel sleep tugging at you, you’re just so comfortable in his arms, you can’t imagine how you slept before.

Satoru pours over the case, hearing you lightly snore, making him smirk just a bit, you say you don’t but you do. And it’s cute. Everything about you, from your soft hair falling against his chest, to your warm little body snug on his lap makes him ache more for you. Your gentle breathing, your scent, the way you cling to him and just fit so perfectly.

How had Satoru gone so long without you here?

He focuses back on the screen, and it starts blurring a bit, a mix of exhaustion, stress and the drinks from earlier. But it’s driving him insane, the thought that he could have put someone up wrongly. It’s been eating at him all week since he’s taken the new case, but now you were here, and fuck you’re so smart, it’s so nice to just have you here.

But he’s worried.

If something happened to you? Satoru doesn’t know how he could go on. Without seeing your pretty smile, the little scrunch of your nose, the way your eyes drink him in, the love is so pure in them. The way you love him makes every pain he has so much more tolerable, and there’s so many things he hasn’t told you yet. He trusts you completely, but he’s scared.

He’s not one to be vulnerable, but you make it so easy to be, though he doesn’t know how much he should put on you, how much of the darkness deep inside him he should show. Satoru has always been fun, goofy and silly outwardly, though when alone he’s anything but, and it’s so nice to be able to show that more with you.

He loves you so much it’s consuming, it gets more and more intense every moment, every second that you breathe in his vicinity, every moment he gets to look at you. You sigh a bit, after a good half hour, and Satoru’s back is getting stiff, fuck you massaging it had felt so good. Things are so good with you it’s terrifying, how easy it is to be with you.

But the world has other ideas.

He doesn’t want to hide you, not hold your hand in public, sneak in your itty bitty apartment, as fun as it may be. He doesn’t want you living there, struggling, he wants to take care of you, fuck if you weren’t so passionate Satoru wouldn’t ever even have you work. He loves your talent too much though for that, the genius mind of yours, so open to him.

He wants to open up more to you, but something still terrifies him, his parents' rejections most of his life did a number, as cocky as he comes off it sometimes is just a show, to make up for it. One thing he’s self assured in though is law, the one thing his parents never wanted, no he needed to take over the family business, exploit people and pay them like shit.

But Satoru went his own way, and now they loved to tell him how disappointing he is, when he literally was the top criminal defense attorney there was. But no, nothing was good enough, but you make him feel good enough, don’t you? With every look and every touch, you make him feel like he’s doing good. How in just a few months have you become so precious?

He caresses your cheek, looking down after finally closing his laptop, you briefly open your eyes, long lashes fluttering, your eyes struggling to focus on him. You’re so cute when you sleep, it’s so different from the feisty thing you are when you’re awake. He smiles at you as you yawn, snuggling him closer.

“Let’s get to bed, yeah baby?” You nod, humming a bit and getting up, just for Satoru to snatch your body up in his arms. You smile sleepily at him, little hand coming up to brush his hair back. Fuck every time you do that you break him more and more.

“Sleepy, Toru.” He chuckles, carrying you to bed, watching you snatch his favorite pillow and wrap in the blankets.

He’ll let you use it.

“You know you’re the first girl to sleep in here?” He asks softly, figuring you’re asleep, but you turn to him curiously, eyes lidded and full lips parted.

“Am I really? How?”

“I never let anyone stay.”

“I’m special, Toru, hmm?” You tease, a little grin on your pretty face, and Satoru will do anything to keep it there. He snuggles with you, pulling your rounded ass against him with a groan, an arm around your waist. Fuck you feel so good in his arms, you do run hot but it’s perfect, he adores this feeling more than he’ll admit.

“You’re especially annoying.” You stick your tongue out, he chuckles, pecking a little kiss on your head, inhaling the sweet scent of you that he can never get out of his mind.

“You love me, shut it.”

“Of course I love you.” Your eyes glisten with tears. “Crybaby.”

“Mmm, shush.” You kiss him sweetly, he watches as the shadows in the room play along your delicate features. God you’re so beautiful. “Not even Suguru slept in here? I don’t believe that.”

Satoru grins then. “I mean the only woman. Of course I’ve cuddled with Sugu!”

“Cuddled, huh?”

“That’s what I call it.” You snort at that, shaking your head. “You are just thinking about us both here with you. Freaky girl.” You giggle a bit, shaking your head.

“I only want you, Toru. Ever.”

Your words stop his heart, slurred a bit as your yawn cuts them off, so genuine it makes him ache. His throat closes up as you do what no one has, making him feel like he’s the only person in the world for you. So special. He blinks back emotion and is glad your eyes are drifting and you don’t see the tears threatening to fall.

“I only want you, ever.” He says softly back, but you’re asleep again, you’re a sleepy little thing aren’t you?

Satoru sighs, pulling you close and laying there for a while, the trial in his mind, the worry there of his past mistakes, of putting you in some danger, but you ease it with his presence, enough that it’s not too long until he follows you into slumber.

*****

Two days later

Satoru and you sit in the courtroom together, and the man next to you both makes you shiver, Satoru’s wearing a perfectly tailored pinstripe suit, fitting his lithe body like a glove. His hair is falling soft and silky, a sleek skinny black tie adorning his starched collar, fuck he looks so good, you muse, as one of his hands squeezes your thigh, and he smiles at you.

“Are you doing okay, Miss Brat?” Satoru murmurs softly, and you nod, hand over his, thumb brushing against his knuckles like he enjoys, earning a sigh from his pretty lips.

“I’m excited to see you in action again, Professor Gojo.” You say softly, and he grins at that, teeth glinting under the fluorescent lights of the courtroom. Satoru’s fan group has gathered, even though you are hours away, they seem very devoted. “They want a wave I think.”

He rolls his eyes, then looks back at the fans, standing for a moment, you hold in a giggle as they gasp, bouncing up and down as he tugs at his pinstripe jacket, winking over to them, shooting two fingers in a salute. It would be corny if it was anyone else, but since it was Satoru Gojo, it was hot. You can’t lie.

You’d be a fan if you weren’t in his bed, surely.

“Oh my god!”

“Gojo!”

“Gojo is she your girlfriend!?”

At that you tense, because if your relationship got out it would fuck your college and career up so badly. You struggle to keep composed, as you know he has to say no, it’s what has to happen, but you know it’ll sting. Satoru laughs a bit at their question, throwing his head back.

“She’d turn me down.” He winks down at you, and you cover your face in embarrassment at the girls.

“No, no one could!”

“Gojo are you single!?”

“Gojo-”

“Ladies, ladies, calm down. The judge will yell at me.” Satoru pouts, looking far too charming, and the girls hush, with the promise of pictures later. Satoru sits back down, looking at you softly, his blue eyes so bright they’re hard to look at. “I hope I handled that right, I’m an idiot you know.”

“No, handled it perfectly.” You whisper, making him exhale. He was worried about your feelings, it touches you so deeply you get emotional.

“I wish…” He trails off, and you just smile a bit sadly.

“One day. Soon ish.” He sighs, and raises his hand as if to brush your hair back, quickly dropping it, but you could feel the caress regardless. Oh how you ache for this man.

“Yeah.” Is his only response, then the judge walks in, this one is different, she’s a little less stern looking, she has pretty flowing black hair.

“All rise, for the honorable Miss Inoue.” The bailiff says, and you feel the lack of Satoru’s hand on your thigh like a deep emptiness. Your hands barely touch, back to back, and you shut your eyes for a moment at it, before taking a breath and focusing. This was gonna be rough.

Satoru had to defend him, but you both were already gathering evidence to the contrary, to possibly charge him with another offense. It put Satoru in a horrible situation, and he’d barely slept, it had even been quiet in the drive here, you all had gotten ready in adjoining rooms, giving him a little silence. He didn’t want to hurt you but he did need some.

Your heart hurts for him, you wish he would share a little more of his feelings, but he tries to keep you in the loop, without actually revealing too much. You would take all of him, however, without hesitation, whether he wanted to be open or not, you would wait forever for him.

Tonight you all are going to the escort agency, to question an old informant of Satoru’s, and you both would learn more. But for now, he has to save face, and do the best job he can. You can’t imagine how hard it is, you can just feel it in his energy, but he turns on that charm like a flip of a switch.

“Court is in session. Let’s commence.” Miss Inoue says, and she lets the prosecution make their opening statement.

“This man here, Naoya Zen’in, is a rich playboy, has gotten everything he’s ever wanted handed to him on a silver spoon.” The lawyer starts, a stern man with a very good history from what you’ve researched. “But for once, a woman didn’t want him, so what does he do? He rapes, assaults, ends her life. This is what men do like him, men of power, to the powerless.”

Naoya was a blond, tall man with cold, sharp brown eyes, and a creepy grin that you suppose some women would fall for. He was handsome, you guess? But there is something about him that makes your fucking skin crawl. As they go on about him, he’s just laughing softly, leaned back against his chair casually, like this is all beneath him, a waste of time.

The handsome playboy in question smirks over at you, and he sends shivers through your spine, especially when his brown eyes look you up and down, winking. You tense, and Satoru looks at him with a glare, earning a bigger smirk, and you watch Satoru’s hands clench the bench so tightly they’re white. You gently touch Satoru’s arm, shaking your head, but he’s shaking damn near.

“Don’t fucking look at her, got me?” Satoru says in a hush, and the handsome (creepy) blonde just grins.

“Oh? Why not? She’s pretty to look at.” Satoru stands but thank goodness they call for the defense to make opening statements then, but you can tell he’s torn. You smile at him softly.

“I’m good, Satoru. Nothing’s gonna happen. Go kill it, yeah?” Satoru looks at you with his thin white brows drawn low, jaw clenched tightly, so tight you see a vein pop from under his fair skin. Then he looks back at his client.

“You won’t have eyes.” Satoru whispers, and your own widen at that, as he then grins, hands in his pockets, slinking over to the middle of the room. He’s smiling at the judge, who can’t help but smile in return. “Hello, lovely. I mean Judgy. Judge?”

The room laughs softly, aside from the prosecution of course, but Naoya seems to have his eyes fixed on you. You ignore him pointedly, focusing instead on taking notes, watching Satoru do what he does best, but there is an unspoken tension, as you feel the gaze still there.

“How long you been fucking each other?” He hisses, and you glare, furious, wanting to deck the mother fucker now.

“Why don’t you focus on the murder trial against you, and not my sex life, huh Mr. Zen’in?” You ask, and he laughs, leaning closer. Thank God Satoru is facing the jury, you feel there’s no way he wouldn’t punch this guy in the face if he saw.

“Your sex life highly interests me, I wonder how good of a whore you can be. Wonder if you’ve been shown.” His words are a bare whisper, but they terrify you, filling you with such nausea you could throw up right here. Your legs are trembling, and you barely keep it together.

“Go fuck yourself, Mr. Zen’in.” He grins, and you turn your attention away, focusing on Satoru now, waves of nausea rolling through you now.

Fuck you hate this dude and you just met him.

Satoru strides across the room, a picture of confidence, and stops in front of the jury now. “This man before you, Mr. Zen’in, is not a monster, but a human being with a heart that beats just like yours and mine. Maybe he is a rich playboy, maybe he does get everything he wants, but he’s not on trial for his lifestyle, but for a crime, that doesn’t have enough proof.”

“Objection!”

Satoru rolls his eyes, head leaning back, and the judge glares at prosecution. “Let Mr. Gojo speak. Mr. Gojo, please continue.”

Satoru smiles, bowing a bit at the waist, and you hear the courtroom swoon. There were more fans now!?

“Thank you, magnificent judge. Your reputation precedes you.” He winks at her, and she’s all pink, before clearing her throat. “Ah, so before I was so rudely interrupted…” Satoru pouts, cutely, earning the hearts of almost anyone. “This guy, yeah he’s kinda a douche…”

Naoya scowls next to you, fists clenched, and you hold in the giggle, but most of the people in the court room fail.

“But just because he’s a pretentious dick, it doesn’t mean he’s a murderer, or a rapist. Surely, he has no issue paying for sex when he needs it.” Satoru looks over to Naoya with his icy blue eyes and snarky grin. You thrill on Satoru in his damn element, in him riling everyone up.

Fuck you love him.

“ I will argue, this playboy has been grossly misunderstood. Let us not be swayed by sensationalism and assumptions, but by the cold, hard facts. And when we do, I believe you will find... lovely members of the jury,” Satoru winks at them, and even the men swoon, “As I have, that there is more to this story than meets the eye.”

Satoru turns then, flashing you a grin that makes your knees knock together, fuck he’s gorgeous, isn’t he? With every eye on the room invested in his every word, every breath, every movement, slinking like the damn cat he is, his dress shoes glinting from the high polish. He tugs at his jacket a bit, loosening a couple of buttons, revealing the starch dress shirt underneath.

“Oh my god-”

“Ladies!” The judge has to calm down the girls, and you do smile then, looking back to see the mess he’s created. Satoru grins.

“So sorry, Judge, I’m afraid my loyal fans can be a little… enthusiastic.”

“No worries, Mr. Gojo. Please continue.” The judge smiles at Satoru, her chin in her hand like she’s in class. You just shake your head a bit at everything, god Satoru really was something else.

“Thank you, Miss Inoue. So… dear jury.” He earns their undivided attention. “Let me show you the truth, don’t worry, I’ll take care of you all.” He winks, and then the prosecution loses it again. “Ah, they’re being so mean! Well, we’ll speak soon, don’t worry. The defense rests its opening statement in the firm belief that we will uncover the truth together.”

Then he’s back next to you, between you and the asshole Naoya, scooching close and leaning to whisper in your ear.

“Did he say anything baby girl?” He asks, and you sigh.

“We’ll talk later, Toru.” He looks at you with concern now, brows knitted, but you just shake your head, as the defense calls their first witness.

“We’d like to call a witness, Mr. Rin to the stand.”

And so the trial begins, and you and Satoru sit, tensely for hours on end, in the gloomy courtroom, as the prosecution questions their witness, and you can feel the gears shifting in Satoru’s head as he pops a piece of candy in his mouth. He hands you on discreetly, and you smile, opening the crinkly wrapper and sucking the little mint into your mouth.

“You’ve got this, yeah?” He nods, smiling a bit, but you could see the toll, as someone possibly guilty sits next to you both.

How does Satoru handle this one?

“We got this, Miss Brat. No worries.” His hand holds yours under the table, and you sigh at how good the little touch feels.

The prosecution finishes with their witness now. “Would you like to Cross examine the witness, Gojo. I mean Mr. Gojo!” Gojo chuckles at the judge, standing as you do, to let him out of the bench, and then he saunters up to the young lady, and you feel his hesitation.

“Hello there, how are you?” He asks gently, to the young lady sitting there nervously at the stand. She sighs.

“I’ve been better?”

“Yeah, courtrooms suck, huh?” Everyone is either laughing or gasping, and the witness smiles a bit.

“They really do.”

“I know, even I get so bored, ugh.” He leans his head back, grimacing then, and you barely hold in your laugh, it’s impossible, he’s so infectious. “But listen, let’s push through it, I’m just gonna ask you a few questions.”

Satoru starts his questioning then, and you notice it’s different, he’s not hitting as hard as he normally would, because he doesn’t even think Naoya is innocent, fuck Naoya could have been doing this. Yet he’s also not going to let this just go, he has to defend him, you have no clue how he’s keeping his cool, not when the man next to you looks so fucking smug.

As Satoru paces, he tosses out questions. "Could it be that the prosecution is more interested in a swift conviction than in the actual facts of the case?" He asks to the jury,  his voice rising just enough to make it sound like a challenge.

“Objection!”

“Sustained, Mr. Gojo, could you please reline the question?” The judge says sweetly, and Satoru smiles.

“Sure, judge, could it be that there are others who stand to gain from my client's downfall?"

The witness sighs. “I don’t know if I can answer that.”

“That’s okay, let me explain to you. My client," he says, turning to gesture at Naoya, "is a young man with a lot of money, and clearly getting eyed by a lot of people who want a piece of it. Would you agree?”

“Um… I guess so, some people like that.”

“Did you like his money?” The courtroom gasps, and the girl is bright red, looking down.

Fuck this disgusts you.

You know Satoru would like to call him disgusting and to fuck off, but here he was, having to do his best.

“The money is fine, but he’s a freak.”

“Oh, freaky huh? What’s wrong with that? Whips and chains-”

“Objection!”

The judge is intrigued though. “No, overruled. Continue.”

“Ah, thank you. Listen, what’s wrong with being freaky, in consesnual acts? Are you saying that equates assault? Some smacks on the ass?” The court room is in a tizzy, and you find yourself flushing.

“Well… no. Not necessarily…”

“Exactly!” Satoru chuckles, throwing his head back, and the prosecutor, visibly rattled, tries to interject again, but Satoru waves him off with a casual flick of his wrist. "Let's not forget, kink shaming is bad.”

“Mr. Gojo!” The prosecution is so angry, and the judge sighs.

“Mr. Gojo… is there a point to this?” She asks, and Gojo nods.

“There sure is, forgive me, I got a little… flustered.” He has the audacity to look innocent and cute!

Fucking Gojo.

He’s brilliant.

They’re putty in his big hands.

“My questions are almost over, love. Can you take one more?” He asks the witness softly, and she nods eagerly. “Perfect. What a good… witness.”

You hear his fans swoon, and people behind you giggle. The witness is entranced, and you’re just amazed at this shitshow, and how well Satoru runs this all so fucking well. He butters the girl up to say anything, it was as if he didn’t even really have to try, but he was trying, you could feel it, to not go too far.

“This may be the first case I lose. On purpose, if we can’t find anything on this fucker.” Satoru had said earlier, as you all drove into court, and you hold his hand that’s on your thigh, sighing.

“I know, Satoru. We’ll figure it out together.” He yanked your hand, kissing it, warm lips pressed on your trembling hand.

“I’m glad you’re here.”

“The defense rests on its questioning.” Satoru says then, and soon he’s back next to you, and court eventually ends for the day.

You let out a shaky breath as Satoru walks up to the defense team, conferring with them, then all teams approach the bench to speak with the judge, and Nouya comes up close to you. You cringe internally, but outwardly you steel yourself, putting a blank expression on your face as he grins, eyes lowering to your breasts, downwards, and it feels so disgusting you struggle not to smack him for it.

“I see why he keeps you around, a shame women just aren’t fucking smart, isn’t it? But useful I suppose.” He acts casual, hands in his pockets, your fingers itch to smack him so badly you grip your books tight to you.

“Yeah, you’re real smart, ended up here and all. Me? Just aced every test and in a top law school. Without ‘daddy’s money’ too.” Your lips upturn just a bit, as you watch his stupid grin turn into a glare.

“I’d teach you a fuckin lesson, little slut, right on that pretty face of yours.” You glare, and just then Satoru is back, and he’s pulling you behind him, crossing his arms and leaning forward, his eyes are a storm of icy blue, his face furious like you’ve never seen.

“I’ll lose this case so quick, swear to fucking god. Don’t think for two seconds you’re good enough to breathe her air, got it?” He says it softly, calmly, looming over him, even though he was tall, Satoru is even taller, and you watch him back up just a step, fear in his features.

“You won’t lose, you never lose. It’s why we chose you.”

We?

Your mind runs rampant, you know the Zen’in are some of the richest people there are, and powerful. Satoru’s own family had run businesses with them, you’d found that out on accident. You tried to not pry, as you didn’t need to know what Satoru didn’t want you to, yet, but it was…

Frightening.

Did Satoru’s family…

“Let’s go.” Satoru shakes you out of your thoughts, and you realize you’ve just been standing there, you sigh, nodding and following him out. He doesn’t give his fans attention this time, he’s raging inside and you can see it, you can feel it, when you both are in the car and he’s punching the steering wheel with his fists.

“Toru, it’s okay! Promise.” You whisper, and he covers his face then, shaking his head, making you hurt for him, as you gently touch his shoulder. “Toru…”

“How can I even keep you safe if this fucker wants to-”

“I can handle myself, Toru, I’m tough you know.”

His eyes break your heart, filled with emotion as he gulps. “ Baby girl if anything happens to you… I swear-”

“Toru.” You stop him again, hands cupping his face, and he’s so tense you feel it through the air of the little car. “It’s gonna be okay. We will do this together, I will help you, I swear.”

“I can’t believe I couldn’t just beat the fuck out of him. What did he even say? All I saw was him near you whispering.” You blink then, looking down. “No, no you better tell me, I have to know what we’re dealing with.”

You take a shaky breath, sighing then. “He said I was going to learn a lesson, on my ‘pretty face’. Called me a slut, a whore. Said he’d have fun with me. Satoru!”

He’s out of the car in an instant, and you hop out to chase after him, as he’s stalking his way up the courtroom stairs. Most of the people are gone for the day, but who walks down buy Naoya himself, ankle monitor on his expensive pant leg, staring at his watch, until Satoru is right in front of him. He’s looking batshit insane, and frankly you’re fucking terrified.

“Satoru…” You murmur, coming up to touch him, and Naoya is smirking at the two of you.

“Something wrong, Gojo?”

“Need a word with you.” Satoru shoves him into a concrete pillar, and Naoya is furious, scowling back at him.

“The fuck?”

“Say anything like that again I’ll break your fucking jaw. Got it?” He demands, and Naoya actually just laughs, it’s dark and sinister. “I know who the fuck you are.”

“Oh do you, now? What’s it matter, huh? Worried about your pretty little-” Satoru punches him then, quietly and so quickly surely no one would know but you three, right in the stomach. Naoya hunches over, but he’s grinning.

“Don’t touch her, I swear to god, there’ll be nothing left to find.” Satoru whispers, and then he looks back at you, at your wide eyes, and he takes you by the hand, easing you away from the laughing man.

“See ya tomorrow, Gojo… doll.” He smirks at you and Satoru nearly punches him again, if not for you gently taking his hand.

“It’s fine, Toru, he’s not worth it.” Satoru’s eyes drink you in, and he leans close, your breath mingling.

“I’ll fucking kill him. You gonna get me off death row?” You feel his anger, his rage even under the joke.

“I’ll be the best attorney ever. I’ll show you how good I’ll be when we get back, yeah?” He stiffly walks away, and then you all are silently driving back home, your arm wrapped around his arm, snuggled close to his strong shoulder.

“I’ll wreck this mother fucker.” He mutters, as he’s driving, you feel all of his muscles so tense against you, his veins popping up around his wrists and hands at how tight he’s gripping the steering wheel.

“We’ll wreck him. Together. Yeah?”

“It took everything not to fucking kill him. Everything.”

“I know.”

Once you’re back at the hotel, you expect him to maybe want time alone, but he’s on you then, kissing you passionately, deeply, your teeth click as he’s yanking you up so close. You can barely breathe, so intense you can’t even take it, lost in him, as his hands are shaking, and you feel his body tremble, you eagerly slide his jacket off him, hands running down his body.

“You’re mine.” He says, through his teeth, his voice is hoarse and his eyes are wild, and you cup his face.

“You’re mine.” He’s moaning, then he turns you, roughly, unzipping the black dress you wore, and the cool air of the hotel room hits your skin. Satoru hungrily kisses down your neck, your shoulders, as his hands wrap around your waist, and your head tilts to the side, for him to have more access to you. “Satoru…”

“I love your body. I love how you feel. I love how you taste.” His husky words are accompanied by fervent kisses, and you melt in his arms, goosebumps everywhere he trails his lips upon. “I’ll kill anyone that touches you.”

“Satoru… don’t say that.” You whisper, but then he’s spun you around, and you’re shaking as you look up at him, at his serious face, so gorgeous and intense that you can’t think of anything else.

“I mean it. I’m sorry if it’s fucking intense, but I can’t lose you.”

“You won’t lose me, I’m yours. I love you.” He moans softly, and as he’s kissing you again, you’re unbuttoning his dress shirt, revealing his perfect hard body, running your fingers down his torso, feeling the hot skin, the hard planes of his body, then your’s unbuckling his belt, and watch his eyes dilate, his lips part. “Let me make you feel good, Toru.”

“Fuck…” Is all he bites out, as his sexy moans urge you on, he steps out of his pants and you sink to your knees on the plush carpet beneath you, licking your lips as he frees his cock, slapping against his belly button, and you hungrily take him into your mouth, eyes meeting his.

“You did so good today, Toru.” You murmur, licking the salty precum from his tip, and he huffs, leaning back against the cream hotel wall, hands undoing your bun, letting your hair flow.

“You’re so fucking perfect, baby girl.” He murmurs, before moaning, throwing his head back and enwrapping his hand in your hair, starting to fuck your throat with his thick length, choking you in the most delicious way. Your hands grip his strong, muscled thighs, as he pumps his cock deeper, until there are tears in your eyes. “Oh my god, baby…”

“Mmm…” You just moan, sucking him, your cheeks hollowing out, and he’s looking down at you, pupils blown out, and you feel the tension releasing as you pump your hands up and down his length.

“Play with that perfect pussy, baby, get ready for me.” He whispers, and you dip a hand down, feeling yourself slick and hot, crying out around his length, he grips you tighter, groaning. “That’s it, good girl. Good girl.”

You’re crying out now, clit puffy and twitching under your delicate touch, in little circles, so slippery your hand slides off. Satoru’s got your face cupped in his hands, as he pumps his hips, and you’re shaking with need, grinding against your hand hopelessly, craving more friction.

“You’re doing so good, baby. Fuck.” He pulls back then, and you let him go with a pop sound of your lips, and he’s swiping the saliva and precum off your chin. “Need you, need you now baby.”

You stand on wobbly legs, then Satoru’s sliding two fingers in your eager entry, as you wrap a leg around his, and he’s holding you around your waist, slamming his lips down on yours. You’re both a mess of teeth, tongues and lips, you swallow his groans and he drinks your sighs, as he’s hitting that spot so good you can’t take it.

“Please, please, please.” You whisper out, as you gasp with pleasure, and he’s spun you then, pressing you face down on the bed, so tall he has to lift your hips up, and then he’s over you, one hand guiding his cock between your lips, and you’re arching back for more.

“Perfect pussy. Perfect mouth. Perfect body.” He gruffly says those words, one hand wraps around your throat as he bends over, sliding his cock all the way in one thrust, and you scream out loud at it. “You’re mine.”

“Yours, Toru. Yours.” He’s gripping your throat tight, starting to fuck into you, and you hear how wet you are, squishing and slapping sounds in the suite, mixed with his labored breaths and your whimpers. “Ngh, s’good f-fuck!”

“Taking me so good, baby girl.” Satoru’s cock wrecks you now, fucking you harder and harder, slamming against your cervix until you feel yourself close, head falling back as his hand squeezes gently. “Made for me. Aren’t you?”

“Y-yes. Yes.” You can’t stop the moans, the cries, and then you feel the pressure burst, and pleasure washes over you in waves, as he claims you his, as he’s fucking you senseless. You don’t even remember where you are, all you know is Satoru Gojo’s cock is pounding your little pussy, and you’re shattering around it.

“Yes, cum for me… such a good girl, aren’t you?” You can’t take it, you’re too sensitive, and he’s squeezing your throat, making everything fuzzy, hazy, and you’ve cum so hard you’re soaked, dripping down the blanket, down your inner thighs, and he’s slipping easier and easier. “You’re so wet for me, so easy, huh?”

“Easy for you, Toru. You.” His big hands move you then, scooching you over the bed and laying on top of you, prone position, you feel the sweat dripping off his chest as he takes you, taking your hands and entwining them with his, planting sloppy, hot kisses along your shoulder blades. “Oh my… mnh… Love you, love you.”

“I fucking love you baby. You’re all mine. Aren’t you?” You nod, and he’s kissing up your neck now, as he’s slowing, grinding that leaking tip against your cervix until you’re cumming again, and he has to pause it feels so good, resting his head against the crook of your neck.

“You feel too good, too good. Can’t take it.” You whine out, as he’s rolling his hips, feeling your walls tighten around his cock, soaking him even more as wetness gushes from your little hole. “Toru, kiss me. Please.”

He takes your chin in a hand, as the other stays entwined with yours, and he’s drinking all your cries now, with a desperate, sloppy kiss. “Want me to cum in this pussy, paint your insides?”

“Yes. Please, please. Please, Toru. Ah!” He’s cumming right then, as you beg him, filling you up and pushing you over the brink, breathless, blinded, consumed by him.

“Fuck- perfect- so… ah… fuck…” He’s grunting, no sensible words, and you’re lost, seeing black and glitter, as Satoru consumes your soul. He eases now, kissing your sweaty back, running a hand down your spine, and you mewl weakly. “Baby…”

“Mmm… yeah? What is it, Toru?” You blink a bit, and you meet his eyes, pussy drunk off you but something is intense, even more than usual.

“I’ll never let anyone touch you. Got it?” You nod, planting a kiss on his lips, which soften under your caress. “I’ll keep you safe.”

“I know, Toru. I know.” He exhales, laying his heavy weight on you, but you love it, you love feeling him, feeling the aftershocks make both of you twitch, a sweaty mess of tangled limbs.

“I want to kill him.” You tense then, peeking back at him.

“Toru we’ll do this. We’ll get justice. I promise. We won’t have to…”

“I want to though. If he looks at you again? I…”

“We’ll get him.” He moans, kissing you again, and then he’s pushing deep inside you, where his cum was pouring out the length, but he’s still rock hard inside you. “Toru, again?”

“Again.”

Chapter 10

ao3:

https://archiveofourown.org/works/56895382/chapters/149180743

[doctorbunny]

MILGRAM Hallucination Booklet Translation pt.1 (Yamanaka and DECO*27 Interview)

Context: This interview was from a booklet handed out at the MILGRAM Hallucination live show on the 21st January 2024 (if you want a copy you can buy it here) This translation was made possible by the generosity of @maxpawb sharing images of his booklet with me This translation is mostly my own, but @maristelina helped me with some sections. Now without further ado:

Q.01 Introduce Yourself. I'm Takuya Yamanaka. I'm the creator/planner/screenwriter for MILGRAM. I'm DECO*27. I work as the music producer for MILGRAM. I like Hatsune Miku.

Q.02 What reactions from the guards have been the most surprising so far? Yamanaka: There are a lot of guards that were born overseas, aren't there? Even though it's created with rather Japanese sensibilities, overseas audiences didn't seem to mind at all. Though the countries and sensibilities are different than what I anticipated, votes have become more multifaceted, it's very interesting, isn't it? DECO: To forgive or not forgive the prisoners what do you do, whether it goes as you expected or the result turns out to be quite the opposite, its fascinating. Maybe your nationality affects the kind of criteria you use to make judgements? I've been thinking about something like that.

Q.03 Is there anything you didn't imagine would happen at the start of the trial? Yamanaka: I didn't write it with a large overseas audience in mind, because from the start I wasn't worrying about popularity at all, I simply didn't think I'd be watching over so many guards. Milgram was developed as a more underground project, but it's popularity is a good surprise, isn't it. DECO: There were more people who got into MILGRAM without already caring about my music than I imagined, it was surprising. I feel like MILGRAM has spread further beyond than what I thought it would. I'm very grateful!

Q.04 So far, what's made you the happiest? Yamanaka: Everything. As a creator it brings me great joy to see a work that existed in my mind, take shape and be enjoyed by so many people. Other than that, because I also love the characters I've birthed, seeing all the guards talking about them and sharing their thoughts, both positive and negative, has to be the best feeling. DECO: It makes me happy to see lots of people analysing the meanings I put in my songs! The theories get pretty close to the truth too, I think... the power of all the guards is really cool.

Q.05 So far, what has been the most challenging? Yamanaka: Because I have to change the script in accordance with the audience's decisions, I can't create the entire story in advance. Furthermore, as of the second trial, there aren't only individual character storylines, the prisoner's verdicts begin to emerge and they influence each other. That is to say, I can't start writing until after everyone's results are out. Willingly subjecting myself to doing something this unreasonable, is what I feel is difficult for me. But because DECO*27 is also going through the same hell, we're holding on to some semblance of sanity. DECO: The story changes in accordance to all the guards' choices, and the music has to be written to match. I think this is harder for Yamanaka-P, who writes the script, than it is for me... But though its tough, I feel its really worthwhile, It makes me really happy to be able to communicate with everyone through my songs!

Q.06 Do you have any regrets like "I wish I had done it differently back then!"? Yamanaka: I've thought it over quite carefully, but there's nothing in particular. I think everyone involved in the project is giving it their all and its a really passionate environment. DECO: Nope! I've been able to put all the things I've thought of into my songs.

Q.07 Which prisoners are the easiest to write dialogue/music for? Yamanaka: If I had to pick one, it'd be Fuuta. He's the type of person that's pretty easy to write because his brain never shuts up. Other than him, Yuno and Shidou are relatively academic kids in theory, so they're easy to write because they're very clear when it comes to what they want to convey. [TL note just because its funny, the idiom Yamanaka uses is lit. "There is barking in the inside [of Fuuta's] head] DECO: It went smoothly for all of them!

Q.08 Which prisoners are the most fun to write dialogue/music for? Yamanaka: Muu's lines were the very fun to write~. I'm fascinated by her approach to life and can't help but envy how fun it must be to behave like that. Yuno and Amane are my runners up. I enjoy writing the kinds of characters who plainly state their ideas and speak eloquently. DECO: Mahiru! From the start writing about the relationships between men and women has been what you might call my forte, its enjoyable to make. I feel like this is also why I find Yuno easy to write for.

Q.09 Which prisoners are the hardest to write dialogue/music for? Yamanaka: Overwhelmingly, Haruka's dialogue takes me the longest to write. I have to use the parts of my brain that I wouldn't normally use to figure out how to not just directly convey what he wants to say. DECO: None of them!

Q.10 What's your favourite combination of characters? Yamanaka: Amane and Shidou. They're on completely different wavelengths about everything, and the best part is that there's no getting around it. My second pick might go to Yuno and Muu. They don't get along at all so their fights are never just superficial squabbling. DECO: I always like the interactions between Es and the prisoners. I'm liking how over the course of the voice drama interrogations, Es seems to be gradually coming to understand the prisoner's humanity. Especially Es + Mahiru!

Q.11 Do you want to be friends with any of the prisoners? Yamanaka: Shidou and Kazui. I like the idea of being friends with professional people. I think that people who choose to go into something specialized, its clear they have a kind of resolve and that's charming, isn't it? DECO: Yuno! I feel like she'd be easy to talk to. She seems like she's used to friends who maintain a good distance from each other. [note: while 'good' here can mean a fair amount of distance, in Japanese relationships the concept of boundaries is also built into the idea of distance, so in English you might talk about someone who is a close friend but still has good boundaries, but in Japanese this is someone who has the 'right amount'/ちょうどいい of distance from you, so this could mean Yuno doesn't have any close friends or that Yuno is just a good friend because she isn't going to turn up to your house unexpectedly and eat all the food in your fridge]

Q.12 Do you want to date any of the prisoners? Yamanaka: I love all of my characters a lot, but, well... how should I say it... I don't think I would date any of them. [TL note: I had to shift the wording to be more natural in English but the Japanese Q is more like 'which prisoner would you want to be your boy/girlfriend?' curse english for not having an exact equivalent to koibito, so Yamanaka's answer is more like 'I think would break up with all of them' its a nominal difference but my friend said to mention it bc its funny] DECO: I'm sorry.

Q.13 What's your favourite line/phrase? Yamanaka:

[Scene from Muu's first voice drama Crying B, TL taken from MILGRAMMER]

Es: Judging from your facial features, are you what they call “half-Japanese”? [lit. haafu/Half] Muu: Yeah… I’m biracial. [lit. daburu/Double]

It would have to be that wouldn't it? I got goosebumps when I wrote it it. DECO:

"It's not my fault"

I think that single phrase was able to represent Muu's character really well, if I do say so myself.

Q.14 Are there any prisoners that you think its good they're in MILGRAM? Yamanaka: All of them. Without these 10 people, this Milgram would be a complete failure. DECO: Without these 10 people, MILGRAM wouldn't exist!

Q.15 Is there anything the guards aren't aware of yet? Yamanaka: Of course, there may be some minor details, but I don't think there are any major points missing. The mysteries have already disseminated, I feel the full picture will be clearly revealed if the theories and wild speculations, which have been shared around the world, come together. As expected. DECO: There are! I hope you look forward to the gimmicks I wanted to put in my songs that will come out in the third trial!

Q.16 Is there anything you haven't been able to do up to now, but you want to try doing after this? Yamanaka: I want to do a stageplay. Every performance would be a different story set in Milgram. If anyone reading this is involved with stage productions, please contact me. [I can't find it now but I swear a while ago Yamanaka tweeted something similar like "I'm interested in doing stage adaptations of Caligula Effect or MILGRAM, if anyone is involved with stage production please contact me" I hope he does it, a MILGRAM stage play would be awesome] DECO: Fortunately, I'm already doing everything I want to do! Writing the trial 3 songs couldn't be more fun.

Q.17 Represent "MILGRAM" in one word. Yamanaka: 『人』 "People" DECO: 『噓』 "Lies" [This one is both simple and interesting so as a preview I'll share how akka and DMYM answered] akka: 『幻』 "Illusions" DMYM: 『信』 "Faith"

Q.18 Give a brief comment about the future of "MILGRAM". Yamanaka: There have already been plot developments that I personally wish I didn't have to write. The guards have all chosen a very intense path. It's frightening. I've also been ready to obey these choices since the start of MILGRAM, so I think we all should enjoy this story that can only be told once together. DECO: I've already started writing the prisoner's songs. It's hell. Please prepare yourselves. Q.19 A message for the guards. Yamanaka: Thank you for always looking after the prisoners. Milgram is a work that involves the participation of everyone, including yourself. The thoughts you had, the actions you took, the joy, and resentment you felt towards this prison, all this became a part of Milgram too. I would like you all to please live healthily in your realities alongside Milgram. DECO: Thank you for your hard work as guards. Although MILGRAM is full of troublemakers, we would be grateful if you could continue to watch over us for a long time to come. We will do our best to meet your expectations.

[A link to part 2 will be posted here when its ready]

(Japanese transcript under the cut)

Q.01 自己紹介を。 山中拓也です。 ミルグラムでは企画・原作・脚本をしています。 DECO*27です。 MILGRAMのサウンドプロデューサーを務めています。 初音ミクが好きです。

Q.02 これまでの看守たちからの反応で驚いたことは？ Yamanaka: 海外にもたくさんの看守が生まれるていったことですね。とっても日本的な感性で創っているので、海外ウケとかきにしていませんでした。やはり国が違うと感性も違うものだと思うので、より多面的な投票がされて、とても面白いですね。 DECO: 囚人が赦すor 赦さないのどっちになるか、と自分で予想していたりもしたのですが、結構それが逆の結果になっていることがあって興味深ったです。もしかして国民性で判断基準が違ってくるのかな？とか考えたりしました。

Q.03 審判開始時点では思い描いていなかったことはあるか？ Yamanaka: 海外ウケ気にしたことないと書きましたが、そもそもウケ自体あまり気にしていなかったので、シンプルにこんなにたくさんの看守の方に見守っていただけるコンテンツになるとは思っていませんでした。もっと、アンダーグラウンドで展開するつもりだったんですが、嬉しい悲鳴ですね。 DECO: 想像以上にDECO*27を知らない方にもMILGRAMを観てもらえたことに驚きました。自分の思っていた以上にMILGRAMが広がったなと感じています。ありがとうございます！

Q.04 これまでで一番嬉しかったことは？ Yamanaka: 全部です。自分の脳内にしかなかった作品が、形になり、たくさんの人に楽しんでもらえること自体がクリエイターとしては大きな喜ぶです。あとはやはり僕は自分が産んだ登場人物のことが大好きなので、プラスでもマイナスでも看守の皆様が彼らについて語って、想いをぶつけてくれいることが最高に嬉しいです。 DECO: たくさんの方に自分が音楽に込めた意味考察してもらえた嬉しいです！かなり正解に近い考察もあって、看守の皆さんのパワーすごいな…と思っています。

Q.05 これまでで一番大変だったことは？ Yamanaka: ユーザーの選択によって、シナリオを変更をするので、あらかじめ制作することができないということです。しかも二審からは個人のストーリーラインだけでなく、他の囚人の結果による影響も出てくる。ということは全員の結果出てからじゃないと制作できないということです。そんな無茶を勝手に自分でやりはじめて、勝手に自分で大変な思いをしています。同じ地獄をDECO27も味わっているので、なんとか正気を保っています。 DECO: 看守の皆さんの選択に応じてストーリー変化し、それに合うように音楽を書くことです。これは僕よりもシナリオを書く山中Pのほうが大変だろうな…と思いますが…大変ではありますがとてもやりがいをかんじていますし、曲を通じて皆さんとコミュニケーションが取れていることが嬉しいです！

Q.06　「今思えばやっておけばよかった！」のような後悔はあるか？ Yamanaka: よくよく考えてみたんですが、特に無いです。制作に関わる全員がベストを尽くしてくれているとてもアツい現場だと思います。 DECO: ないです！思いついたことはすべて楽曲で出力できています。

Q.07 シナリオや音楽の制作がスムーズな囚人は？ Yamanaka: 一人あげるとすればフータでしょうか。頭の中でわんわん言ってるので、かなり書きやすいタイプです。あとはユノや、シドウあたりの比較的理論的で偏差値高めな子たちは何が伝えたいかが明確なので書きやすいです。 DECO: みんなすんなりでした！

Q.08 シナリオや音楽の制作が一番楽しい囚人は？ Yamanaka: セリフを書いていて一番楽しいのはムウですかねぇ~。こんなふうにふるまえたち人生楽しいだろうという憧れすあります。次点でユノやアマネでしょうか。思想がはっきりしてて、弁の立つタイプは書くのが楽しいです。 DECO: マヒルです！自分が元々男女間の関係性を描くのが得意ということもあって、楽しく制作しています。そういった意味ではユノも書きやすいなと感じます。

Q.09 シナリオや音楽の制作に苦労する囚人は？ Yamanaka: 圧倒的にセリフを書くのに時間がかかるのはハルカです。彼が伝えたいことを、伝わらないようにする調整に普段は使わない脳を使います。 DECO: いないです！

Q.10 お気に入りの組み合わせはあるか？ Yamanaka: アマネとシドウ。すべての要素が噛み合わなさすぎて、どうしようもないところが良いです。次点でユノとムウかもです。表面的なケンカにならないだけでかなり気が合わないので。 DECO: エス対囚人の絡みは須く好きです。ボイスドラマの尋問によって段々とエスが囚人の人間性を掴んでいく様が気に入っています。特にエス＋マヒル！

Q.11 囚人を友達にするなら誰か？ Yamanaka: シドウとカズイ。友達にいてほしい職業の人たちです。なにかのスペシャリストを選択する人たちというのは、何かしらの覚悟が決まっている人だと思うのでそれだけで魅力的ですね。 DECO: ユノです！話していて気楽そうだなと感じます。お互い良い距離感を保てる友達になれそう。

Q.12 囚人を恋人にするなら誰か？ Yamanaka: 僕は登場人物のことを全員最高に愛してますが、まぁ、なんというか、全員やめとこうと思います。 DECO: ごめんなさい。

Q.13 お気に入りのセルフやフレーズは？ Yamanaka: 「その顔立ち、ハーフというやつか？」「うん...…ダブル」ですね。書いてて鳥肌でした。 DECO: 「悪くないもん」 1フレーズでムウのキャラクターを上手に表現できたなと我ながら思っています。

Q.14 ミルグラムにいてくれてよかった、と思う囚人は？ Yamanaka: 全員です。この10人でなければ、このミルグラムになっていないので。 DECO: MILGRAMはこの10人がいなければ成立しません！

Q.15 看守たちにまだ感づかれていないことはあるか？ Yamanaka: もちろん、些末な部分はあるかと思いますが、大きいところだとないんじゃないですかねぇ。既に問題はバラまいたし、世界中に発信された考察や妄想を組み合わせたらきっちり全貌が明らかになる気がします。さすがです。 DECO: あります！第三審で僕が楽曲を通じてやりたかったギミックが出てくるので楽しみにしていてください！

Q.16 今できていないが、今後やってみたいことはあるか？ Yamanaka: 舞台がやりたいです。毎公演、コンセプトの異なるミルグラムで行われる舞台。舞台制作に関わる方が、読んでおられましたら是非山中まで。 DECO: 有り難いことに、やりたいことは全部やれています！第三審の曲を書くのが楽しくてしょうがないです。

Q.17 「ミルグラム」を一文字で表せ。 Yamanaka: 『人』 DECO: 『噓』

Q.18 今後の「ミルグラム」について一言。 Yamanaka: 既に僕が個人的には書かないでいたかった展開が確定しています。看守の皆さんなかなか強烈な道筋を選びました。恐ろしい。自分もその選択に従う覚悟をしてミルグラムをスタートしているので、一度きりの物語を皆さんと一緒に楽しもうと思います。 DECO: 既に楽曲を書き始めている囚人もいます。地獄です。覚悟しててください。

Q.19 看守たちへメッセージを。 Yamanaka: いつも囚人たちのことを世話してくださってありがとうございます。ミルグラムとは、参加する皆さん自身を含めてミルグラムという作品です。この監獄に対して感じた思い、起こした行動、喜び、 憤り 、それらすべてが作品の一部になります。是非ミルグラムと共にある皆さんの現実を健やかに生きてくださいませ。 DECO: いつも看守としてのお勤めご苦労さまです。曲者ばかりのMILGRAMですが、これからも末永く見守っていただけると幸いです。期待に応えられるよう、尽力してまいります。

[sturniololover005]

Chris Sturniolo - Can't resist

Warning ⚠️: smut, small amount of angst, f!masturbation, oral (m. receiving),cheating (Chris),

Summary: You and Chris used to fuck buddies, that is until he gets a girlfriend - but can he really resist you?

Words: 3.2k

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You and Chris had a complicated history. There were good times, like when you two hooked up, and bad times, like when you confessed your love for him. He rejected you, and everything changed after that, especially when he got a girlfriend a month later. She was beautiful, exactly his type, and it hurt you deeply. You saw every Instagram post, every comment, and every TikTok they shared. You tried not to let it get to you, even though you spent sleepless nights dreaming of being in Chris’s arms.

Despite your best efforts to move on, the memories lingered. Each social media update was a painful reminder of what could have been, and it seemed like everyone but you was moving forward. Your nights were filled with a mix of longing and frustration, remembering the intimate moments you had shared and the connection you thought you had. It was a struggle to let go of the hope that maybe, just maybe, things could have been different. Your nights were filled with longing and frustration, thinking of the intimate moments with Chris. Letting go seemed impossible, each memory a bittersweet reminder. Alone, you touched yourself, reliving the passion you shared.

Your favourite memory was the time you did it in the car where he and his brothers filmed their videos. You wore his forgotten shirt, his favorite panties, and escaped into your own fantasy. You missed his long fingers, the way he curled them inside you, hitting all the right spots.

Toys couldn’t compare, only making you more desperate. That’s when you decided to see if he could really resist you. You would wear his shirt, the scent of him still clinging to it, and the panties he loved. You needed to remind him of your nights of passion, make him remember.

Could he really resist you? You were about to find out.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

You take a deep breath before knocking on the door, trying to steady your nerves. To your luck, someone opens it almost immediately. Unfortunately, it’s not Chris, but Nick, standing there with a wide smile. "Hey y/n! I haven’t seen you in a while. Where have you been?" he asks, his cheerful demeanor a stark contrast to your anxious state. "Oh, I’ve just been busy," you reply, attempting to match his casual tone. "Is Chris here?" The question escapes your lips with an almost desperate edge. "Yeah, he’s in his room. Come in, I’ll go get him." Nick steps aside, opening the door wider to let you in. "This is my chance," you think, heart pounding. "Oh no, it’s fine. I’ll go myself," you say with a reassuring smile, trying to mask your nervousness. You walk down the familiar hallway toward Chris’s room, each step making your heart race faster. Your sweaty palm curls into a fist as you approach his door. The closer you get, the more you feel your heart beating in your ears. Your breathing becomes unsteady, the wetness from your palms sticking to your fingers, sending warm shivers through your body. Finally, you raise your hand and knock. The door creaks open slowly, revealing Chris standing there. His hair is messy, and he’s wearing a wife beater and pajama pants that fit him so well it’s almost criminal. For a moment, you’re both silent, just taking each other in. "Y/n?" he says, his voice filled with surprise. Hearing him say your name again brings back a flood of memories. You realize just how much you’ve missed him. "Why are you here?"

“I missed you,” you say, using the sultry tone that always made him go weak. You had used it often in the past, and it worked every single time. Chris clenches his jaw the moment he hears your voice, fully aware of your intention. He hated that it was working—it wasn’t supposed to. He had Isabelle now, but God, did he miss you. He missed the way your soft giggles would escape when his hair brushed against your thighs, how your fingers would tangle in his hair, pulling him closer. He missed the sound of your gasps, the way your grip would tighten on his wrist when he found that perfect spot. He missed the sight of your lips, swollen and bruised from your own teeth as you tried to stifle your moans. He missed the electric connection, the raw passion that ignited between you two every time you touched. He missed the way your bodies moved together in perfect sync, as if they were made for each other.

Chris struggled to keep his composure, his mind torn between loyalty to Isabelle and the undeniable pull he still felt toward you. The memories of what you shared were vivid, almost tangible, and resisting you felt like trying to hold back the tide. Despite everything, the intensity of his longing for you had never really faded. His internal conflict was palpable, and you could see it in his eyes.

“Stop that, Y/n,” he says in a low tone, but he doesn’t realize it only makes you want him more. You step closer to him, a slow, deliberate move. “You know you miss it too, Chris. Don’t lie.” He turns his head, avoiding your eyes, but you see the conflict written all over his face. You close the door behind you, sealing you both in this intimate space. Still stepping closer, you watch as he retreats, his steps unsure until he backs into the bed. Seizing the moment, you climb onto his lap, straddling him. You reach out, gently turning his head to face you. “Look at me,” you command softly, your voice a mixture of desire and determination.

His eyes are narrowed, his jaw clenched tightly, and his hands grip the sheets so hard his knuckles turn white. He’s trying his best not to reach for you, to maintain control, but you can see the internal struggle. The tension between you is palpable, a magnetic pull that neither of you can ignore. “You don’t know what you’re doing to me,” he mutters, his voice strained. He’s battling his own desires, trying to stay loyal to Isabelle, but the longing in his eyes betrays him. He wants you just as much as you want him, and it’s taking everything in him not to give in.

You lean in closer, your lips just inches from his. “I know exactly what I’m doing, Chris,” you whisper. “And I know you want this too.” His breath hitches, his eyes locking onto yours with an intensity that sends shivers down your spine. Slowly, hesitantly, his hands leave the sheets and rest on your hips, his touch igniting a fire within you.

“You shouldn’t be here,” he whispers, but his grip on your hips tightens, pulling you closer. You can feel the heat radiating from his body, the undeniable chemistry between you two reigniting. “Maybe not,” you reply, your voice barely more than a breath, “but we both know this feels right.” He hesitates for a heartbeat, then he moves closer, pulling you into a kiss.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

You respond instantly to the feel of his lips on yours, your body reacting with a shiver of anticipation. Your hands move up to cup his face, your fingers tracing the line of his jaw and feeling the slight stubble there. His skin is warm beneath your touch, grounding you in the moment. His hands are not idle either, traveling over your body with a sense of urgency, as if he’s been longing for this moment as much as you have. His fingers press into your back, pulling you closer, as though rediscovering the way your body fits perfectly into his hands. You can feel the heat radiating from him, matching the growing fire within you. Every touch, every movement, feels electric, heightening your senses. The world outside fades away as you lose yourself in the kiss, the only thing that matters is the connection between the two of you. You bite his bottom lip gently, eliciting a low, guttural growl from him. The sound sends a thrill through you, a spark of excitement that makes your heart race even faster. Taking advantage of his reaction, you deepen the kiss, your tongue tentatively exploring his mouth. The taste of him is intoxicating, a blend of familiarity and desire. He responds eagerly, his tongue meeting yours in a passionate dance. His hands roam your body, memorizing every curve and contour as if he’s afraid this moment might slip away.

His touch is both demanding and tender, a combination that leaves you breathless. He pulls you even closer, his hands sliding up to tangle in your hair, tilting your head slightly to deepen the kiss further. Your bodies are pressed together so tightly you can feel the steady beat of his heart against your chest, a rhythm that seems to sync with your own racing pulse. The intensity of the kiss grows, a fiery exchange that speaks of all the emotions you’ve both kept bottled up. His hands drift lower, finding the small of your back and pressing you even tighter against him. The sensation of his body against yours is almost overwhelming, a heady mix of comfort and desire that leaves you yearning for more.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

You slowly begin to pull away from the kiss, savoring the lingering warmth of his lips against yours. As your eyes flutter open, you become acutely aware of the firm pressure of his hard cock pressing against your ass. The sensation sends a shiver down your spine, igniting a deeper desire within you. Every nerve in your body feels electrified, attuned to the intimate connection you share in this moment.

With deliberate slowness, you rise from his lap, the heat of your bodies momentarily parting. Your breath quickens, anticipation building with each passing second. As you drop to your knees on the floor, you glance up at him, meeting his gaze, which is filled with raw, unspoken desire. The intensity in his eyes makes your heart pound even faster, your skin tingling with excitement. Your hands tremble slightly as they reach for the hem of his pants, your fingers curling around the soft fabric. You take a deep breath, steadying yourself, before tugging gently but firmly, pulling his boxers down along with his pajama pants. The motion is slow, deliberate, a tantalizing tease that only heightens the anticipation.

As the material slips down, you watch with bated breath as his cock is gradually revealed. It stands proud and erect, rock hard and pulsing with need. The sight of him, fully exposed and waiting, sends a fresh wave of excitement coursing through you. Your eyes linger on his length, taking in every detail, the way it throbs with every beat of his heart. You feel a surge of heat between your thighs, your own arousal growing in response to his. The sheer intensity of your desire threatens to overwhelm you, but you revel in it, embracing the passionate energy that crackles between you. Your hands move with a mind of their own, fingers lightly grazing his skin, eliciting a shudder from him. His breath hitches as you lean in closer, your lips brushing against his inner thigh. The touch is feather-light, a whisper of what’s to come, and you feel him tense beneath you. You smile to yourself, knowing the power you hold in this moment, the ability to drive him wild with just a touch.

Your eyes lock onto his, and you see the storm of emotions flickering there—desire, anticipation, and a hint of frustration. You maintain that eye contact, letting the connection between you deepen, before you let your lips trail teasingly to the tip of his cock. Your kiss is feather-light, barely a touch, but it’s enough to make him shudder. The soft gasp that escapes him as his head falls back is music to your ears. You know that his dick hasn’t been teased like this in a long time, and the realization sends a wave of satisfaction through you.

You continue your slow, deliberate exploration, your lips pressing gentle, lingering kisses along his cock. His reactions are intoxicating, his body responding to your every touch, his breaths coming faster and more ragged. As you reach the tip again, you flick your tongue out, just barely grazing the sensitive head. His response is immediate and intense, a deep groan rumbles from his chest, and his hips jerk involuntarily. You smile against his skin, knowing that you have him right where you want him. The power you feel in this moment is heady. You glance up at him again, taking in the sight of his head thrown back, the tendons in his neck standing out as he struggles to maintain control. His hands are clenched into fists at his sides, and you can tell he’s fighting the urge to take control, to guide you, but he holds back, letting you lead. The trust he shows in you only heightens your desire, making you want to drive him even wilder.

You continue your teasing, alternating between soft kisses and gentle licks, keeping your touch light and playful. His reactions are everything you hoped for, his body trembling with need, his breaths coming in harsh, uneven gasps. Finally, you take the head of his cock fully into your mouth, swirling your tongue around it with deliberate slowness. The sensation is overwhelming for him, and he lets out a guttural moan, his hips bucking up towards you.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Just as you’re deep in the moment, lost in the sensations and the heat between you, his phone rings. The sound is jarring, cutting through the intensity of your connection. You glance at the screen and see the name flashing: Isabelle. Fuck. You can feel Chris’s body tense with nervousness, his muscles tightening under your touch. The change in his demeanor irritates you, the intrusion snapping you out of the passionate haze. With a sigh, you reluctantly take his cock out of your mouth, looking up at him with a mixture of annoyance and disappointment. "Just pick up," you say in an irritated tone, rolling your eyes as you sit back on your heels. He hesitates for a moment, then reaches for the phone, his hand shaking slightly. He answers, trying to sound casual, "Hey baby." The words infuriate you, a sharp pang of jealousy and anger flaring up inside you. You listen as her cutesy voice chirps on the other end, "Hey babe, what are you doing?" The sweetness in her tone grates on your nerves, and you can feel your blood boiling. But then, an idea forms in your mind, a wicked smile curling your lips as you remember a particular night not too long ago.

It was a night when you had gone on a date with another guy. When Chris found out, he had stormed into your place, furious and possessive. He had taken you roughly, fucking you raw, all the while making you call the other guy to cancel any future plans. The memory of his dominance, his need to claim you as his, sends a shiver down your spine. Now, it’s your turn to take control, to make him feel the same jealousy and possessiveness. With a devious glint in your eyes, you lower your head again, taking his cock back into your mouth. You hear him suck in a breath, his body tensing even more as he tries to maintain his composure. You start slow, teasing him with your tongue, your lips sliding over his length with deliberate slowness. His hand trembles as he holds the phone, his voice strained as he tries to keep up the conversation.

"I'm just... hanging out," he says, his voice faltering slightly as you take him deeper, your mouth working expertly. Isabelle’s voice continues, oblivious to what’s happening on the other end of the line, "Oh, I was just thinking about our plans for tomorrow. Maybe we could go to that new restaurant?" Chris struggles to keep his voice steady, his free hand gripping the edge of the bed. "Uh, yeah, that sounds... good," he manages, his breath hitching as you swirl your tongue around the head of his cock. His hips twitch involuntarily, and you feel a surge of satisfaction at the control you have over him.

"Are you okay? You sound... out of breath," Isabelle says, a hint of concern in her voice. You smirk around his length, the idea of her suspecting something making the moment even more thrilling. Chris clears his throat, trying to compose himself. "Yeah, I'm fine. Just... a bit tired, that's all." His words are clipped, strained, and you can tell he's struggling to keep up the facade. You increase the intensity of your movements, your head bobbing up and down, taking him as deep as you can. His free hand tangles in your hair, a silent plea for mercy that you have no intention of granting. As you continue, you slide a hand between your legs, touching yourself, feeling your own arousal heighten with every reaction you draw from him. The sensation of pleasuring both of you at the same time makes the moment even more electric.

Isabelle chatters on, her voice a background noise to the symphony of pleasure you're creating. "I can't wait to see you tomorrow. I've missed you so much. It's been too long since we've had a proper date night." Chris’s responses become more monosyllabic, his concentration split between the conversation and the overwhelming sensations coursing through his body. "Yeah... me too... tomorrow... sounds good..." His voice is a mix of breathlessness and barely contained arousal. "Chris, are you sure you're okay? You sound really weird," Isabelle’s voice cuts through, more insistent now. You glance up at him, meeting his eyes, and you see the desperation there, the need to keep it together. "Yeah, I'm... just really tired," he says, but his voice breaks slightly, a low moan escaping despite his best efforts. Isabelle falls silent for a moment, and you can almost hear her suspicion growing. You suck harder, taking him deep into your throat, and his body shudders violently. "Chris, what's going on? Are you sure everything's okay?" Her voice is sharp now, almost demanding. "Isabelle, I... I have to go. I'll call you later," he manages to say, his voice strained and breathless. He hangs up quickly, the phone dropping from his hand as he finally lets out a deep, guttural moan, his body shuddering with the release of the tension he had been holding back.

You smile around his cock, feeling a sense of triumph and satisfaction as you continue to pleasure him, driving him closer and closer to the edge. As you take him deeper, your movements become more urgent, more demanding. You want to push him over the brink, to make him come undone completely. His hands tighten in your hair, his hips thrusting up to meet your mouth, and you can feel him getting closer and closer. The power you feel in this moment is intoxicating, and you revel in it, knowing that you’ve turned the tables, that you’ve taken control. When he finally comes, it’s with a raw, primal intensity that takes your breath away. His body convulses, his cock pulsing in your mouth as he spills into you. You take it all, swallowing every drop, savoring the taste of his release. As he collapses back, spent and panting, you pull away, wiping the corner of your mouth with a satisfied smirk.

“I know you can’t resist me”

[ja3hwa]

♡ 𝐃𝐚𝐲 𝟏𝟓: 𝐂𝐨𝐫𝐫𝐮𝐩𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧 - 𝐊.𝐇𝐉 ♡

God Isn't Here

【sʏɴᴏᴘsɪs】 : Bad Boy Hongjoong wanted to change for you. Be the better man you deserved, but what if you ended up changing more than him?

『ᴡᴏʀᴅ ᴄᴏᴜɴᴛ』 :  3.70k

-> ɢᴇɴʀᴇ: Slice of Life. Toxic family. Smut. ANGST. Sad Stuff.

ᴘᴀɪʀɪɴɢ: BadBoy!Hongjoong x Religious!GoodGirl!Reader

[ᴡᴀʀɴɪɴɢs] : Heavy religious background. Mention of a cult like life. Lots of trauma. Pet names. Swearing. Corruption and slight manipulation. Thigh riding. Dry humping. Oral. Crying turned to sobbing. (I'm sorry this is a shit show). Fingering. Sight sir kink (I can't help myself). When I say this is messy....this is MESSY, FILTHY, DIRTY. Breast play. Clothing is literally being ripped apart. Slight ass play and mention of anal. Hickies. Mention of sex toys. There is way too much dirty talk cause Hongjoong has a filthy mouth. Use of the name slut. So much sobbing please forgive me I was in a mood. Cowgirl. Unprotected sex. Loss of virginity. Spanking.

Thank you, @historyinmybed , for requesting Hongjoong. Also, thank you to my anony for requesting the plot ♡♡♡

Note: I want to point out that this fic this is no way hating on any type of religion. I came from a very religious household, so I get the idea of internal hatred to yourself and 'god'. But please take this fic with a grain of salt. Believe what you want to believe and practise what you wish to practise. No one should tell you what you can or can not worship. That's your life. Not there's.

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Perfection. That was what your family described you as. Their perfect little daughter. Naturally pretty, above-average smarts and a people person. Well, that was what your parents dressed you as. They weren't half wrong to be fair. You wanted nothing more than to be the sweet daughter that your parents wanted. But once your heart fell for the mysterious man that stumbled in the back of your bookshop one day. Perfect was no longer the description to view you as.

Rough, mysterious, heartbreaking bad boy. He looked like he jumped straight out of a dark romance novel. He was everything you were not and when he laid eyes on you, he knew he wanted to know you, have you, hold you. To fuck the innocence out of you. But he proceeded with caution. Not wanting to scare you away. He was known as a player, someone that fucked around and partied most weekends…

Yet he changed.

Changed for you. He dotted on you. Followed you around like a loving puppy that found his favourite thing in the world. Which he had. You were his everything and the love of his life and he would do anything for you. And he made sure you knew that every chance he could. Bringing you flowers to your work or gifting you with a home-cooked meal even though he wasn’t the greatest cook. He wanted you to know that he loves you. Forever and always. And when you were cuddling on the couch in your shared apartment―the apartment your parents didn’t know you had―one night, Hongjoong couldn’t seem to keep his hands to himself. He tried not to do something you didn’t want but fucking his fist to the thought of you was no longer working. He needed the real deal. And tonight he tried his luck. His touches were slow, sensual. You almost didn’t notice them while you were so focused on the new show Fionna and Cake in front of you. But when his fingertips grazed the end of your sleep shorts, your head snapped to him seeing he was completely focused on you, not even paying attention to the TV.

You gulped looking at him with such wide innocent eyes. The tingle in your gut made you confused but it also intrigued you, wanting to know what it was but you were also scared it might be considered unholy. You see, you were fighting an inner battle. Yes, you had left your family's practice and ran away with Hongjoong after he convinced you of your family's toxic lifestyle. You wouldn’t ever consider your life being involved around a cult-like community but yet it was all you knew. And when you opened a bookshop in your hometown your parents made sure to monitor the shop like hawks but neither of them would have thought someone like Hongjoong would stumble into the doors of the sweet establishment. Without even realizing, that day you starting losing your faith in god, if you even had any. It was just a way of life to you and you didn’t know any better back then but now you explore the world day by day with your sweet lover boy and god definitely didn’t have anything to do with that.

“W-what are you doing?”  As if you couldn’t sound any more cute than you did right this minute. His eyes darkened, sucking in a breath as he watched you squirm. Your doe eyes watched him intensely, your hand snaking down to grab his, holding him still. Did you really not know what teasing was? Then again you didn’t know most things until he came along. When he first kissed you, he still remembers the shocked expression you made and how you slapped his chest slightly saying ‘We aren’t supposed to do that.’ But now all you do is kiss him. Morning kisses, hello and goodbye kisses. If you walked into the room he would grab you for a smooch. He loved kissing you and even though you would not admit it, you craved them too.

“I’m just wanting to touch you, Darling.” His soft voice sent shivers down your spine. You gulped, not knowing what exactly he meant. You gave him a confused expression, and it finally clicked in his head that you didn’t know what was going on. “Can I touch you, baby?”

You smiled letting his hand slip into your own, tilting your head “But you are touching me Joongie.”

Oh fuck, you look so goddamn cute and it made him want to pin you to the couch and fuck you into next week. He wanted, needed to teach you this side of life you didn’t know about. Take it slow, Hongjoong repeated to himself, placing his hand free hand on top of yours. He closed the distance between your lips but just kept enough space to let you pick whether or not to actually kiss him. And when you gave him a simple smile before sealing your soft lips on his, he took it as a green light to push you further.

“I mean touch sensually...” He peaked your lips again. “Touch you where the ache it.” He kissed the corner of your mouth as both of his hands got free, letting his finger graze your top thigh before slowly slipping towards your inner thigh. Your eyes never left his, eyebrows knotting in anticipation. Your brain was screaming at you, saying what you were about to do was sinful and bad. But your body craved to see what he could do. Could he really help take that ache that pulses in your stomach? The idea of giving yourself to Hongjoong more than frightened you… it excited you.

“What are you gonna do to me?” You didn’t mean to sound so seductive but Hongjoong drank every word you spoke. And the way you said it would have any man eating out of your hand, yet you didn’t even notice. Merely thinking you were simply asking an innocent question.

“Oh, Darling.” He dipped his fingers further up your thigh helping you open your legs without a thought, too focused on what Hongjoong might say. And he thought, for maybe two point five seconds on what he might say. Does he ease in and take it slow like his brain has been repeating for the past month or does he just drop his filter and see how you react?

He chose to fuck around and find out….

“I want to put my fingers deep inside your pussy.” Your eyes widened at the lewd words that spilled off your lover's tongue. “I want to know what it feels like to fuck you, make love to you.” His fingertips graze your covered core and it makes you jump, whimpering out. You gripped his wrist trying to stop him but you didn’t move him away, too curious to see what he’d do. “Would you let me see what your cunt feels like angel?”

“Y-you can't make l-love to me yet. We aren't married.” That was what you took out of his whole confession, man has got his work cut out for him. He had to laugh a low deep grumble making you shiver. His fingers were still playing with your covered core, trying to pull at the buttons of your pants. “We haven't decided if we want kids yet.”

“Kids?” Okay, now he was the one confused, “Who said anything about kids, darling?”

“Y-you know…” damn now you feel stupid, of course, this was another thing your parents taught you wrong. You tried to learn things on your own, only just recently finding out what a male privates were called. You felt so small in this outside world and you tried your hardest not to let Hongjoong see just how closed off you were growing up but sometimes it slips out, just like now. And the only way to get out of this was to explain yourself. “You only mate to have bare children. No pleasure or love… it’s a ritual that a married couple preform to conceive kids.”

Hongjoong tried to not look shocked but then again he really wasn't. When he found out you were living in cult-like conditions he did everything in his power to get you out of that situation whether you liked him to or not. He couldn’t just leave such a sweet thing like you to be devoured by the jaws of a sick bastard who played a so-called god. “My sweet, sweet baby. There is so much more to love-making than bearing children. Do you want me to show you?”

He gave you one last slow kiss, holding your cheek with his free hand keeping you in place. You sigh in the kiss, feeling a kind of relief and safety. All he wanted to do was keep you comfortable and not do anything you were unsure of. But now you wanted to give back. Give back to his kindness and understanding. You wanted to know, to know what it felt like to be with someone completely. But your mind kept playing the idea that you were betraying your god. You were fighting an inner battle and you didn’t know what to do. “Y-You can s-show me Joongie.”

He shifted his weight, turning to look at you straight on. He placed both hands on either side of your face before asking again. “I need you to say yes baby. Do you want this? Are you sure?”

“Yes.” You might have said that a little too quickly for your liking but Joong. Oh, he’d been waiting for this moment and it couldn’t be any more perfect. Grabbing your hips he pulls you up onto his lap. Your face was flustered a bright red. Your hands instantly gripped onto his shoulders as his own snakes under your loose top, feeling your bare tummy. He kisses you on your lips, then a peck on your cheek, then jaw. Before moving down to your neck. His hot tongue licked a long strip against your skin making you shiver, digging your fingers into his shirt. He chuckled feeling your hips wiggle, trying to subconsciously relieve the ache.  He held your hip with his right hand, helping you move slowly, letting you take control, for the moment. He wanted to ease you in, let you find your rhythm. “J-joongie I f-feel.”

“Feel what baby? What do you feel?” He pulled away to look at you, using his free hand to slowly move down your navel before landing just above your core. Your eyes stayed closed, rocking your hips slowly. Your clit was brushing against your jeans just right and it was sending your head into a spin. You didn’t know how to describe the feeling but it felt, good. Right, almost. And then he cupped your pussy making you jump.

“I feel hot… I think I-I’m sweating d-down….” You looked down, seeing his hand holding your core. He looked down to, knowing exactly what you were saying. Chuckling against he rubbed his two middle fingers along your covered slit.

“It’s not sweat Darling. It’s called cum. It comes out of you when you’re feeling good.” he continued to rub you making your mouth fall agape slightly. He leaned towards your ear kissing the top of your neck before whispering. “and it tastes delicious too. Can you give me a taste baby?”

You hesitantly nodded, “Yes, but is…” He looks at you in your wide eyes. “ W-what about g-gods way…”

“Fuck god. He doesn’t know a good thing if it was staring at him in the face.” His voice was laced with aggression. But his lips against your neck were soft, gentle. “Forget god, baby. It’s just you and me.”

You and me…. Something he has said to you since you met. Sneaking out he always said it was you and him against the world and the day you had packed your bag―with what little you had―and left while your parents were out you knew he’d be there for you. You still wonder if your parents even read the note you left them. But then again they most likely would have thrown it away, not caring for a sinner like you anymore. “I don’t know if I c-can…Hongjoong…”

He stopped. For a moment. Anger was surging through him. Your family fucked you up so much and all he wanted to was find each and every one of those preachers and kill them where they stood. He wanted to protect you, hold you. Love you. “Yes you can angel. You can do anything you want. You are so strong.”

And with that you kiss him, taking in a big breath in through your nose. He pulled away first making you chase his lips but as his body sinks onto the floor, you watch with curiosity. He sat on his knees, never breaking eye contact with you. His hands find the buttons on your jean shorts, helping you loosen them before ultimately slipping them off. Everything was happening so fast yet so slowly as well. your body was shaking, feeling exposed without your pants but as his gaze switched from yours to your core between your legs, you couldn’t help but whimper. “Hongjoong…”

“It’s okay baby I’m going to make you feel good. I promise.” He lent in pushing your panties to the sides and finally getting a good view of your soaked cunt. “Fuck, you are so pretty baby.” he wasted no time in licking a long strip along your folds making you make a high-pitched noise that was music to Hongjoong’s ears. He got to work, suckling, biting and tending to your core. You had thrown your head back against the couch, grabbing your lover's thick dark hair and spreading your legs wider for him without realizing. A strange feeling was brewing in your lower tummy and you couldn’t find the words to explain it. You were feeling all types of emotions, happiness, guilt, hatred, lust and everything in between. And then Hongjoong took his fingers against your core making you jump.

“Hongjoong, w-wait…” But your lover didn’t listen cause he knew you’d just start talking about god again. He needed you to listen to him and if words weren't going to work. Maybe a demonstration would. His mouth cages your clit while his finger begins to sink into you slowly and you felt electricity surge through you. Everything you did for your parents. The little girl that “raised right” was slowly slipping away and it was terrifying you. Tears started prickling down your face, feeling so good but so guilty at the same time. Why did your parents have to do what they did to you? Why couldn’t they have raised you normally? Were you could make your own mistakes. You hated them. You hated everything. Everything except Hongjoong. “G-god…”

You didn’t know what you wanted to say but you knew he wasn’t going to listen, in fact, he snapped instead making a chill pool inside you. “God isn’t her baby, now let me have my meal. Got that?”

“Yes sir…” You cried, feeling him put another finger inside you.

“Fuck say that again…” He groan against your clit.

“S-Sir…” You obeyed, feeling his fingers thrusted in a harsh pace making you scream out, tears pouring out of you more and more with your mouth spilling out saliva onto your chin.

“That’s right baby. This is my pussy yeah? I get to play with her―Fuck her whenever I want. Do you understand?” He chuckled, nibbling on your puffy nub.

“Y-yes sir. Please, have me whenever you’d like. I’ll be good. I promise. Fffuuck!!” You’ve never sworn before but it felt like a word needed for this occasion. A band in you snapped, feeling yourself clench around Joong’s fingers. He slowed down until he came to a stop, but not pulling his fingers out just yet. He had to see your face, the way your nose scrunched up when his thumb pressed firmly on your clit and fingers slowly slipping from inside you helping your ride out. Hearing you swear was single-handedly the sexiest thing you could do. He stood up quickly, grabbing your wrist so he could pull you up making you stand. But your legs didn’t want to work so he hand to hold you up.

“Don’t worry baby. You’re always good baby. My sweet girl.” he pecked your nose making you smile. He rubbed away some of your tears with his left thumb. You both stood there for a moment letting you catch your breath. But without you noticing he undid his belt and jean buttons, shaking his jeans off. You only then noticed when a hard object poked your tummy. Looking down you see his appendage under his boxers. You had to gulp worried as to how it might fit inside you. He licked his lips watching you inspect him, he had no shame, slipping his thumb under the band of his boxer before pulling it down, letting his cock spring free.

You gasped seeing his dick whack his navel. Its red angry tip leaking out some pre-cum and twitching just at the thought you’d touch it. You looked back at his eyes with wide doe eyes, almost silently asking what was going to happen next. He swung you both around so his back was facing the couch before taking a seat on it. He pulled you along letting you take a seat on his lap. The feeling of his hot cock against your pussy made you clench around nothing. Your nerves were shot and you were shaking with a mixture of fear and excitement.

“Ready?” He simply asked, snaking his hands under your top tugging on the fabric slightly. You nodded, answering with a small yes before he took the end of your shirt and ripped it down the middle. You gasped, moaning without thinking. Your chest was suddenly exposed to him, leaving you completely bare for him. He had a sadistic smirk painting his features, leaning down he licked your left nipple making you whimper out his name. Your hands found his shoulders, letting him attack your chest with harsh red and purple marks. His hands that layed on your hips moved behind you. One grabbed a hand full of your ass while the other one glided toward your asshole. He put pressure against your hole and it made you wiggle in his grasp. He lived for your reaction.

“Sensitive Doll? I wonder what I would feel like to fuck this tight little ass too? Hmm.” His dirty words made you feel filthy in the best way. His thumb slipped into your puckered hole for a moment sending a new feeling through your system. Anything he did was pushing your buttons correctly. It was like he knew your body better than you did. “You’re just a dirty girl, aren’t you? Wanting to be fucking in the ass? Bet I could fuck this pussy while I have a pretty dildo up your ass. Hmm. Would you like that? You want to be my little slut?”

“I-I’m not dirty…I..I..” You didn’t know what to say feeling conflicted in his words. But he couldn’t care, your body was reacting perfectly to his words and that’s all he needed.

“Don’t worry baby. I’ll fuck you nice and full. And then we can go shopping. I plan on showing you all the pleasure you’d been missing out on.” his laugh was lewd, almost cruel sounding and you couldn’t help but moan in response. He lifted you up slowly without you taking much notice, only focusing on his finger thrusting in your asshole softly. It was only when a sharp pain started forming in your front you snapped your eyes open looking down.

“F-fuck…Hongjoong!!” he helped you sink down slowly until you had him completely nestled inside your aching cunt. You were crying again. But it was different this time. The pain was only slight, you actually didn’t mind the pain. But it was the value of what you had just done. Wrapping your arms around his shoulders you sobbed. Crying from all the frustration. All the anger you had against your parents. Against your community. You had now completely turned your back on the god you once worshipped. All your life learning certain things was for nothing.

“Shhhh. It’s okay.” he rubbed your back, feeling a tingle in his gut. God, you felt so good, your pussy was clenching him perfectly but he felt sorry for you. You had lived only one way and he came in and changed your life in a blink of an eye and it wouldn't had been easy one bit for you.

He had made a promise to himself that night. While his hips started to move and your body started to stutter with him. While his lips were on yours or sucking sharply on your neck. While his hands smacked your plump ass helping you ride his cock at a desperate pace. And when he bent you over the edge of the couch so he could fuck you from behind while you creamed all over his cock for the fourth time. He was going to love you, now and forever. He was going to teach you new things every day and always make sure you were the best version of yourself. And he was going to also fuck you in every room of this house…

That last part might of just been more for his sake but it’s the thought that counts.

- ♥︎

[afreakingdork]

Deep Dive: Rise of the TMNT Donatello's Bad Boy Persona, His Cute, But Mean Type, and Why He is None of These Things

I made this presentation to delve into my take on Rise Donnie!

It was a power point, but I'm going to break it down here. I do want to preserve the first slide though because...

Did you know Black dahlia's aren't actually black? They're very dark red and in flower language they represent dishonesty!

Apropos, let's get into it...

Donnie is a Bad Liar

We see this throughout the show

“No? No… Of course I did… n't.”

"Uh, nothing. Just having a typical normal mystic free day."

"We are just typical, normal humans who got lost in the middle of our normal, everyday human lives. Nailed it."

"Oh man. Uh. This hurts me. Uh. I'm very sad?"

He has all the characteristics of a terrible liar. He sweats, his pitch warbles, his eyes dart, ect, everything you would expect.

Sarcasm! The Perfect Cover?

When Donnie does go for the use of sarcasm, he almost always points it out.

"I feel better already," he said without a hint of sarcasm."

"Oh, sure. Let me just load my tap-into-every-security-camera-in-New-York app. I'm sorry if that sounded like sarcasm, it wasn't. I am in."

Point Out the Obvious Much

However, when he doesn't point out the sarcasm, he also can't help but make mention of the oxymoron. We see this a lot, especially in Donnie vs. Witch Town.

"Oh yes very cool says Donnie as he quietly lets something go."

"Ooh, fireworks. Science never would have thought of something it was originally inventor of."

So basically, if Donnie tries to lie; he gives himself away. If Donnie tries to fudge the truth; he's compelled to make note of it.

I bring this all up to specifically tackle this sentence:

“So unfair. Although it is a boost for my emotionally unavailable bad boy image. “Y’ello.””

Why do I do so? Let me remind you of my first slide...

But how can that be? We just established that he's a bad liar. In the 'bad boy' line, he's not falling for any of his tells. He's body language gives no indication of lying. He doesn't make any note of sarcasm. No one after this line makes a face or corrects Donnie and he doesn't point out any discrepancies.

How could this be a lie?

Because Donnie himself doesn't know it's a lie.

Let Me Take You Back

Things I Did Unironically as a Teenager

Added Japanese honorifics to the end of my friends nicknames (-san, -chan, -kun)

Had my friends help me wrap myself up in caution tape for my birthday, but told people they made me

Wore a dog collar with a dog tag that had my name in Romanji on it

Had screen names like RubyBlueSango62 and blahweeblah626

But That’s Just Personal Experience!

Things Donnie has Unironically as a Teenager

"Ah, yes, so in this case a game of bask-eh-ball."

"Prepare to eateth thy words."

"Oh, hey guys. What’s the haps? Huh? Oh, oh this? I didn’t realize I had it on. This is my sweet new purple satin jacket- Got it from being a bit of a tech wiz. Purple Dragons. Members only. No big deal. Mm-hm. Well, you better grab some toast, fellas, 'cause you are all jelly!"

“It's Bootyyyshakker9000. Capital B and three Ys in booty.”

I believe it's a universal experience for teenagers to push boundaries. For so long, most parents decide everything for you. With hormones and growth, you want to experiment, but since autonomy is new, you try to break from the mold and do it uniquely. Anything that is outside your norm, especially things that swing wildly from what you once new seems especially exciting. From embellishing speech, to wearing specific clothing items, and even your first screen name, you don't know boundaries! It may be 'cringe' in the future, but when you first do it, it seems like the coolest thing ever! It's something that wholly represents you. This online space you. This you that is ungoverned! I'm an only child so I can't imagine, but I bet you especially want to do this when you have siblings. Where the shame in that?

I mean... Kat Haynes agrees with me on this...

Low Empathy

Now to get a little more serious. Alexithymia is a term that describes those who have difficulty feeling emotions. While not always associated with autism, it is more common in individuals with it. About 1 in 5 people who have autism also have alexithymia.

As already stated, it is clear the Donnie suffers from alexithymia. Most Donatello-centric conflicts in Rise have nothing to do with Donnie being emotionless and instead often deal with him lashing out due to his confusion or insecurities. We see this a lot especially in Witch Town where he is grappling with himself the entire episode. He's insecure about how he doesn't understand mysticism and he doesn't know how to process it or his place on the team. He's not emotionless, he's insecure when he doesn't understand something.

"Yes, feelings. Hot, cold, sleepy, hungry…"

"I don't normally feel things, but that one got through!"

Emotions on his Metaphorical Sleeve

Nothing about alexithymia says that you don't feel emotions. Instead, it's characterized by not understanding them. Donnie feels his emotions big and large just like Mikey does and especially if something is important to him, you'll see those reactions dialed up to eleven.

All Talk

While many think of the classic "semi-lethal" line and the "Speak for yourself" when Mikey says they aren't savages in regard to Donnie, he's not really the bad boy he plays himself up to be. When the theatrics are set aside, most of Donnie’s snap judgements are the altruistic kind or he thoughtfully plans out ways to not only take care of his family, but actively ensure their safety (to varying degrees of success, but that's not what we're saying here):

created devices which both counteracted his brother's flaws because they were getting them hurt

Used himself as a shield for Mikey on multiple occasions 

Risks his own safety and bodily harm especially in Turtle-dega Nights: The Ballad of Rat Man and Breaking Purple

Builds Escape pods for everyone 

Enters a sensory nightmare for the sake of the world

Often asks, especially Raph, if he's okay and looks out for the oldest brother

Yet the Presentation Continues?

Why yes, because there is another line of Donnie's that I want to tackle that I believe falls exactly in line with the 'bad boy image' one...

"Oh, you’re so cute, but so mean. Why do I always go for your type?"

You know what I'm about to posit again...

Insecure

As touched on previously, Donnie is insecure. He's insecure about his emotions. He's insecure about his place on the team. He's insecure about anything he doesn't understand and his insecurities are exceedingly personal in nature because he ties them intrinsically to his personality.

"The real thing is much more personal and thoughtful, and I really hope you like it, ‘cause if you don’t I will just be crushed!"

"This’ll teach you to compliment my work and give me my first positive reinforcement from a parent aged adult, ever!"

Speaking of parent aged adults... i wonder where this could stem from...

Role Model

Who do all the turtles model themselves after, but their own father? Whether they knew it or not, Lou Jitsu was someone they all strived to be like. They commited to learning all the lines from his movies. They fought like him outside of the training course Splinter sets them on. Heck, Donnie takes his hero worship so far that his character defining brows are exactly Lou Jitsu's! Babies start learning how to establish social and emotional relationships around 18 months. We have Splinter, a despondent, but loving care giver who unfortunately did not give Donnie the validation he craved. This manifests in his insecurities where he bends over backwards to get the attention he craves. He wants to be seen, again compounded by having three rowdy mutant-powered brothers, and so he ends up tying his worth into his ability.

Now, while for a majority of the series, the turtles don't know about Splinter's past or that he dated Big Mama, but it wasn't as if Splinter hid that part of himself away so obviously. In fact, because he himself is still mourning his lost humanity, he ends up feeding his son's a hardy diet of his life's existence. The boys are secondarily raised by Lou Jitsu movies in place where Splinter is not always present. Obviously, Lou Jitsu seemingly disappears, but Splinter's feelings on the matter don't. He openly still cares about Big Mama in the present and this I don't think it's a stretch to say that he would let these feelings leak in a similar way to how he presents Lou Jitsu in the boys lives. Big Mama is a attractive, albeit manipulative woman. This is awfully close to a little line someone says, especially when we consider that he models himself after this man.

Also, if we're taking models into account. Something we know for a fact shapes teenagers. Something we know for a fact that Donnie does. Something that is equally canonized in the show, then we have to talk about.

Donnie’s True Canonical Idol

That's right. You know her. You love her. You believe that Donnie is a thigh man because of this Lass' existence. Donnie says flat out that Atomic Lass is his childhood idol. He goes to great lengths to dance with her, smashing Leo out of the way. He then even goes so far as to ask if her and Atomic Lad have split up because his intention to date her is so clear. Now she was obviously a mutant in a costume, but that didn't matter because he loves Atomic Lass that much and Atomic Lass?

She's a heroine.

Only cute and mean in the context of the episode, this is not the Lass he fell in love with. The Lass he loves is a comic book hero that travels the universe doing good.

Also....

Ron Corcillo Agrees With Me

A staff writer on Rise, I apologize I can't show the origin tweet because it was deleted, but it was a dual question that asked both about the Turtles meeting Spider-man and about Donnie's preference. Now you could say he's forgotten a line that may not be as important to him, but doesn't that in and of itself say something? It says that it could have been a one-off joke or that it wasn't something that was necessarily intrinsic to the character.

To Recap:

Donnie doesn’t always know himself

Donnie is a cringey teen

Donnie is insecure

Donnie has difficulty understanding emotions and himself

Donnie isn’t actually an 'emotionally unavailable bad boy'

Donnie doesn’t actually like the ‘mean’ type

Sources:

Rise of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles episodes:

Mystic Mayhem

Donnie's Gifts

Pizza Pit

Hot Soup: The Game

Shadow of Evil

Donnie vs. Witch Town

The Mutant Menace

Breaking Purple

Turtle-dega Nights: The Ballad of Rat Man

End Game

Repo Mantis

Mascot Melee

Donnie's Gifts

Bug Busters

War and Pizza

Goyles, Goyles, Goyles

Lair Games

Rise of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles: The Movie

lactoseintolerentswag's post on Rise Characterizations Pt. 3!!!

skulltrot's Donnie (Rise of the TMNT) | Autism Representation in Media video

Ron Corcillo's tweet from Cartoon Brew's Feb 10, 2024 AMA

Alexithymia | Autistica

earthytzipi's post not understanding why people characterize Donnie has hiding his emotions

hyperfixatinator's post about ROTTMNT Theory: Donatello's Hidden Role

[vixstarria]

Another gift

This is a continuation of my headcanon of Astarion’s romance with bard Tav. I can’t remember the actual chronology of cutscenes, but let’s assume this takes place after you’ve started a sexual relationship with Astarion and are beginning to grow closer. I was going to take it in a different direction initially, but these things have a mind of their own once they get going. 

If you like it, check out my first fic. I do plan on writing more! 

P.S. I may have taken some liberties with the game background story and DnD lore and magic system here – if it doesn’t really match up or make sense – sorry! Also I’m still only on Act 2. 

Tav tries to comfort or distract a brooding Astarion. 

Astarion x Reader, Astarion x Tav, Astarion x Bard Tav  

Comfort, fluff, budding love, humour, angst, banter, no spoilers, non-explicit 

Approximately 2,000 words. 

AO3

 

Astarion was standing outside his tent with his back to the camp, staring into a silver mirror. The man had either lost his vampiric condition, lost his mind, or was simply brooding.  

“Looking at something?” he asked absent-mindedly, as you approached. 

Brooding. Definitely brooding.  

“Looking for something.” 

“Oh?” He turned towards you. “Just my company, or is there something else I can offer you?” 

“I'm the one making an offering, actually. I thought I’d bring you a little snack” 

Astarion grinned and beckoned you inside his tent.  

Inside, aside from his bedroll, was a trunk with a large mirror opposite, a lit lantern and a scattering of weapons, equipment and books. You assumed your usual position, cross-legged on the bedroll, and offered him your wrist. This didn’t take long. Just a little pick me up.  

He finished, planting a light kiss on your wrist, reached for his amulet and whispered an incantation to heal the wound. He kept hold of your hand, lacing his fingers through yours.  

“Do you have any idea how much I appreciate that you don’t sexualise this?”  

“I haven’t thought about it... Really?” 

“Well imagine that any time you went to, say, take a bite of a turkey leg, there was someone staring, groping themselves and wagging their tongue at you. When you’re just trying to perform basic functions to stay alive.” 

“Sweetheart, that’s an average evening at the pub for me, when I perform. With or without me biting on anything. ...But I see what you mean”. You contemplated what he just said in a brief silence. “I can't believe you just compared me to a turkey leg.” 

“You’re more of a ripe, juicy peach” he said. You found yourself oddly pleased to be compared to fruit rather than poultry. 

You glanced at the large mirror standing on the floor of the tent.  

“You own an awful lot of mirrors for a vampire. Why do you even keep this here?” 

“That? Oh, it reflects light... makes the tent appear more spacious... prevents anyone from sneaking up on me. ...Unless they’re another vampire.” Astarion said contemplatively. “And I figured, I woke up once with a tadpole in my brain that let me walk in the sun again – who's to say I won’t catch another parasite tomorrow that might cure my vampirism entirely?” 

“Do you miss it? Seeing your own face?” 

“Preening in the looking glass? Petty vanity? Of course I miss it. I’ve never even seen this face. Not since it grew fangs and my eyes turned red. My face is just some dark shape in my past. Another thing I’ve lost. I wouldn’t even recognise myself anymore. It’s been two hundred years.” 

“But...” you fumbled, trying to wrap your mind around that. “You could have found a street artist to sketch you since then.” 

“In the middle of the night?” 

“Or commissioned a portraitist, those artistic types would accommodate you any time of day or night” 

“Commissioned a - …I’m sorry, at what point did I give you the impression that Cazador paid us an allowance..?” Astarion was growing agitated. “And before you say I could have stolen – remember, everything I had, anything I acquired by any means, the clothes on my back, my body, my will – it all belonged to the master.” He paused, regaining control of his demeanour. “There was no point in having any possessions, it would all be the bastard’s in the end. I didn’t want to give him any more than I absolutely had to.” 

You kicked yourself in the ass mentally.  

“Well how’s this... We get to Baldur’s Gale. We exterminate Cazador and take over his palace. Then we rip out whatever he’s got as décor, commission all the best artists, and hang paintings of you on every wall. There will be nothing but portraits of Astarion everywhere.” Astarion’s eyes softened as he watched you gesticulating and getting carried away by your own imagination. “Astarion in shining armour. Astarion on a horse. Astarion on silk bedsheets, half-covered in rose petals. Pirate Astarion. Astarion stroking a cat. Historic events, but every single person depicted is Astarion. Oh! And in the main banquet hall, there will be an enormous mural of you, fully naked, lounging on a divan and being fed grapes by a cadre of nymphs.” 

“With a fig leaf covering my unmentionables?” 

“A comically large fig leaf. Or better yet, no fig leaf, just your full unmentionable glory looming over the dining table” You paused, as if sobering up after being lost in your grand vision, and added in a more serious tone: “We can commission busts and statues, too. Get a mold of your face for a hyper-realistic one.” 

“We” he whispered, as if to himself, with a scornful chuckle.  

“Oh? Do you have someone else in Baldur’s Gate you’d rather spend time with?” You realised how callous that might have come across as soon as the words were out, and cringed inwardly. 

“...No, I don’t” he said absently. 

“Elves live long lives... Do you still have real family there? Friends from... before? ...A spouse? Children?” You'd wondered about this before, and figured you may as well lie in the hole you’d dug for yourself.  

“Gods, no!” Astarion blinked in surprise. “I wasn’t even considered a full adult by elven society then. No, mercifully I didn’t leave any little Astarions behind. All my friends from my youth are either dead or have blissfully forgotten me. And I don’t even know where my family is.” 

You gave him a sympathetic and questioning look, waiting for him to go on. He sighed and continued. 

“As you might expect, Cazador placed a restriction on me, preventing me from telling anyone about my affliction. I couldn’t approach my old acquaintances and go ‘Surprise! I’m actually alive! ...Sort of. I’m just someone’s vampire spawn slave now!’. No. I was to turn around and walk the other way if I ever came upon anyone who might recognise me. I was supposed to be devoted only to my new ‘family’.” he scowled. “I feared that Cazador would use anyone he thought might be important to me against me - for fun, or to teach me a ‘lesson’. And he would have, too: the mental torture he unleashed on his spawn was far worse than physical.” He paused and took a deep breath. “I couldn’t go and see my family, but as soon as I had my wits about me, I managed to arrange for one of the mercenary guilds to quickly escort my relatives out of the city. They were to be told that I made some powerful enemies who had me murdered, and that these enemies would come for them next. That they had to leave, change their names, and never return. I don’t know where they went. I can’t know, if I want them to be safe.” He looked away. “I can’t imagine how much they hated and cursed me. I ruined their lives.” he whispered. 

“You saved them!” you objected, taking his hand. He shrugged but squeezed your hand back. 

“I suppose I might have. Cazador would’ve left their heads on spikes in my crypt by now, otherwise.” He met your eyes again. “So yes, if anyone is going to be helping me decorate a palace, it’s you.” he added with a false cheer, clearly finished with the topic of Cazador.  

You thought he might want to be alone then and were about to leave, but he gently pulled you towards himself. He was sitting on the ground with his back against a trunk. You settled between his legs, your back against his chest, his lips right at your ear, one arm across your shoulders and chest, the other playing with your hair. The large mirror was on the ground right in front of you. He studied your reflection over your shoulder. You appeared to be lounging suspended at an odd angle.  

“How does it even work, anyway... It’s not just your body that disappears, it’s your clothing, too”. You grabbed a hat from the top of the trunk, holding it by its crown, and held it over Astarion’s head, moving it in circles against his hair. “Now you see it...” You let go and watched it disappear in the reflection. “Now you don’t.” 

“I’m actually not sure, darling. Maybe it needs to be supported solely by me. Or it’s got to do with movement” He threw the hat back onto the trunk, where it reappeared in the reflection. 

“Say...” threw your head back to look up into his eyes “Do you think my reflection would disappear... if a part of you was inside?” you bit your lip and grinned mischievously.  

“I don’t think so, but I love how that dirty mind of yours works” he purred in your ear. “Let’s check and find out” His hand slid towards the clasp of your pants, but you swatted it away. 

“Later.” Suddenly you were on a mission. “I have an idea.” 

The rest of your group were gathered around the fire as you made a dash for your tent and grabbed your kit of stage paints and powders.

“Chk, are you doing each other’s makeup in there?” came a scoff from Lae’zel, as you rushed past. 

“Don’t be jealous, Lae. We’ll have a girls night and braid each other’s hair tomorrow” you retorted, making Shadowheart choke on her drink.  

Back in Astarion’s tent, you reached for one of your loose facial powders. 

“You really don’t need to do anything, I’m used to it and nothing will work anyway” protested a confused and weary Astarion. 

“Astarion!” you said gravely, “This isn’t for you. This is for science”, and you blew the powder hard into his face. Sure enough, an outline of his features appeared briefly in the mirror, as the powder flew all around him. “It worked!” 

“Fan-tastic! Too bad you had to blind me to achieve that split second of a silhouette!” he coughed and rubbed at his eyes. 

“It should work with water, too, if you want me to pour some over your head. You need to wash all that powder off anyway, you look ridiculous.”  

He glared at you through the still flying powder particles and pointed a finger at your face.  

“No.” 

“Actually, hang on, I have a better idea.” You heard him groan into his hands behind you, as you ran back to your tent, to return with an amulet.  

“So, the good news is, I am really, really bad at this.” 

“If this involves setting me on fire again...” 

“That was an accident. Anyway... No, this lets me create a fog cloud. Or so it should. I can just barely manage some fog tendrils. Now if I just aim them at your face...” You concentrated on the spell. Whisps of fog appeared around Astarion. “Look...” As the fog tendrils twisted in the air, you could just make out a form that they floated around, in the reflection, one unmistakably of a face.  

“Well...” breathed Astarion, transfixed by the reflection, trying to make motions with his head to make the fog recoil. “It’s not much, but it’s more than I’ve seen in centuries” 

“Come on” you grasped his hand. “Let’s go outside, it needs a different light and a slight breeze” 

Astarion snatched his handheld mirror and followed you. He was actually eager.  

Outside, Astarion spun in the whispy fog, gazing at the mirror in disbelief, as you continued to concentrate on the spell. It was actually working. Your conjuration magic was just bad enough to make the thinnest layer of fog, framing his face like a delicate mask and reflecting in the mirror. What would have been considered incredibly precise work by a wizard, was made possible entirely thanks to you borderline failing.  

“That’s better... I’ll channel the fog right, you turn left against it. No, your other left! No, don’t go into the fire, you idiot, it won’t be my fault this time” 

You grabbed Astarion by the hand and tried to guide him away from fire and anything he could trip over – he was paying exactly zero mind to anything around him, as he semi-stumbled in circles, looking in the mirror. Scratch ran around you, barking, excited for a new game, and eventually tripped you both. 

“Another gift...” Astarion smiled at you, as Scratch did his utmost to lick his face.  

Meanwhile, the group watched the two of you from a distance, dumbfounded. Lae'zel broke the silence: 

“Your people have the strangest mating rituals.”  

“Should I... should I tell them I can probably just cast mirror image on him? I’ve only done it on myself, but it should follow the same principle” added Gale. 

“Maybe tomorrow” said Shadowheart. “Just let them enjoy this tonight.” 

~~~~~

Next in series

AO3

[ibetonlosinghuskies]

patience and pleasure pt 5

summary: the morning after the party, paige and azzi grapple with their feelings. as they navigate the aftermath of their shared moment, both struggling to read each others' emotions and define their relationship.

cw: fluff, slight angst.

disclaimer: everything i write is fictional, any and all similarities to real life is not intensional.

word count 4.7k +

author's note: ik yall are fed up with my melodramatic ass i’m sorry 😭

paige's pov:

the morning light through my blinds is harsh and telling. the events of last night flood my mind. slow dancing in the street, pleading her to hear me out.

i remember everything.

the hurt in azzi's eyes, gentle and hopeful. her kiss on my forehead felt more like a goodbye than anything else. a rush of embarrassment courses through me. all my desperation for nothing.

years of carefully towing the line between friendship and something more, all undone by my alcohol fueled vulnerability. this wasn't to say i didn't mean it, though. i felt a strange relief that night, even if she hadn't believed me, it felt good to finally get it off my chest.

i should text her and apologize.

my fingers hover over the screen, debating what i should say. what do i even tell her after all of this? i'm left without words, everything i've ever wanted to say, was said last night.

the words i want to type burn in my throat: "i meant every word i said."

but i can't bring myself to do it. the memory of azzi's pained expression, filled with a slight pity. her gentle rejection, while seemingly reluctant, stops me cold.

what if i tell her i remember and it ruins everything? what if my honesty costs me the most important person in my life?

my chest tightens, an anxiety builds between my ribs. and to make matters worse, i'm definitely hungover from last night.

maybe it's better if i just pretend i forgot.

the thought of denying my feelings feels like a betrayal—both to azzi and to myself. i've spent years hiding my feelings, making them smaller, more manageable. but now that they're out in the open, how can i possibly go back from that?

my mind races with possible messages to send her, each one feeling like a step backward. maybe this is what she wants? maybe azzi doesn't feel the same and was just trying to spare my feelings? give me an out, an opportunity to forget and move on.

she wouldn't let me tell her i was in love with her.

the phrase still lingers on my tongue, catching in my throat. i need to think logically here, but my mind is fuzzy and filled with what-ifs.

the next few days blur together in a haze of anxiety and embarrassment. every time my phone buzzed, my heart skipped a beat, hoping it was her.

i tried everything to keep my mind off of her. i spent hours on the court, lobbing up the ball. my performance was lacking, my body reflecting my mind. i ran drills until my legs burned and my lungs ached.

i couldn't outrun my feelings.

i prayed that god would save me from this. give me the right words, the courage to speak to her. i begged god to take her away from me if it wasn't meant to be.

every time i closed my eyes to pray, i saw her face.

i had a few days between the end of the season and training camp, so i went back home to minnesota. packing away all of my emotions in a carry-on bag. thinking that if i pretend to forget long enough, maybe i really will.

i can leave everything here, all of my mistakes, left behind in storrs.

i should be happy to see my family, especially after so long. i've missed them immensely, but as we greet each other, my mind still wanders to her.

"welcome home, paigey!" drew calls from the driveway, standing between my mother's legs. my heart aches, he's gotten taller since i last saw him.

"hi guys," i greet them both, my voice steadier than i felt. they helped me carry my bags into the house. it came naturally to them, after years of supporting me through tournaments and travel. but this time was different. this time, they were carrying more than just clothes and basketball shoes.

deep within those zippers—the heartache, the regret, my unspoken truth. everything i tried to leave behind.

the weight of my baggage laden on my family's shoulders.

the rest of the day, we fall into a familiar rhythm. mom's home-cooked meals, drew's relentless teasing, the comfort of my childhood bedroom. it was easy to slip back into the role of their little girl, a hometown prodigy, untouched by my mistakes of today. it's almost enough to make me forget about everything.

but during family dinners, i'd zone out, wondering what azzi was doing. checking her socials, even though i knew she wouldn't post. was she thinking of me? did she miss me? was this killing her too? i felt guilty for being so absent-minded from my family but i couldn't stop it.

they're my family but azzi was my home.

i went to bed feeling heavy. our days of no contact burdening my heart. it's the worst at night; i haven't been able to sleep much.

the darkness of my childhood bedroom felt suffocating. the walls closing in on me with the momentum only fear brings. my sheets tangle between my legs as i toss and turn. the bright red numbers of my alarm clock taunt me, blinking with expectation.

2:17 AM. i stared at the ceiling. my room so dark, i couldn't tell if my eyes were open.

i miss her voice.

the way she'd whisper to me in the dark of my bedroom. her words like a blanket, soft and heavy.

3:34 AM. i grab my phone, scrolling through our last text. my thumb twitches over her contact.

i miss her touch.

the calmness she carries in her fingertips. the way she ordered my body with just the stillness of her hands.

4:22 AM. i tuck my knees into my chest, burying my head between them. without her, i feel like a kid again.

i miss her eyes.

a knowing spark that glistened at me occasionally, cutting through her poised resolve. the way her eyes lightened when it caught flickers of sunlight, my little pool of honey.

caught in the small space between her eyelashes, i drifted to sleep. it'd only been an hour or two when i heard my phone ding. reflexively, my heart races, hoping it's her.

i reach for my phone, my heart stopping for a moment as i read the text. 

surprise hits me first. azzi's family had always been like a second family to me, but her timing is insane.

then comes a wave of dread. would it be weird? azzi and i haven't spoken in three days, not that i've been counting. our last interaction burned in my mind. does azzi even want me there? had she told her parents what happened?

hope flutters in my chest. maybe this is a chance to mend things, to be normal for a night. the thought is interrupted by a creeping sense of doubt in my gut.

what if azzi doesn't even know i'm invited?

my fingers hover over the keyboard. part of me wants to accept immediately, desperate for any connection to azzi. but another part of wants to decline, to shield myself from confrontation.

as a middle ground, i like the message. giving myself time to debate my decision. this dinner invitation feels like a crossroads. whatever i decide, it could change everything. again.

azzi's pov:

the familiar creek of the third step on the staircase takes me back. my grandparents' house held a special place in my heart. maybe it was the cozy 70's bohemian style that carried through their decor.

maybe it was the fact that it's only twelve minutes from paige's house.

i've been waiting for her to reach out first. after that night, after everything she said, i didn't know where her head was.

god, i feel awful.

i let my fear shut her down. i should have let her finish, should've told her i feel the same. she tried to tell me she's in love with me, words i'd been dying to hear since we were fifteen.

i tried to keep my mind off it, but the guilt was eating me alive. i threw myself into anything else, impatient to relieve this feeling.

i spent hours with my headphones on, letting the music drown out my thoughts.

but every song was about her.

the lyrics distorted to say her name, echoing through the cavern of my heart. i heard her soft breath between beats, real and steady. guitar chords mimicking the hum of her content.

when the silence became too much, i read for hours. clinging to the words on the page, desperate for them to take me away from this reality. i'd almost finished two whole books in the span of three days.

but every story mirrored our own.

i was living between the pages of my favorite romance novels. the missed connections and unspoken tension, all much too real to bring me any comfort.

every distraction felt hollow in comparison to my guilt. a persistent shadow, clouding everything i do.

the happiness that i used to find so easily, died on her lips that night.

the afternoon sun filtered through my curtains, i set the table, getting ready for dinner.

"azzi?" my mom calls from the kitchen while washing the dishes. "i was thinking you and grandma can make some of those chocolate chip cookies paige loves," her voice nonchalant.

my heart flutters when i hear her name, and before i can say anything, she continues. "i invited her over for dinner tonight," she says smiling.

paige. here. tonight. as in a few hours from now, tonight.

"what?" i choke out, my mind racing.

my mom misreads my panic for excitement. "i've missed her, you remember all the summers she's spent here," she says, looking back down at the dishes.

how could i possibly forget?

i sprinted back upstairs, my thoughts spinning. she was going to be here. sitting at my dining room table, looking as beautiful as always. after everything that happened.

i imagined all the different ways tonight could go. what if she doesn't want to see me? what if i ruined everything?

i hope she meant everything she said.

my thoughts shifted to my appearance. if tonight really was going to be the night i finally open up to her, i needed to look nice. i tear through my closet, clothes littering my floor.

i settle on a soft pink sweater. she once told me she liked the fabric, she'd run her fingers down my spine melodically.

maybe she'd reach out to touch me tonight.

my hands shake slightly as i apply my mascara. i fan out my eyelashes, i wanted her to look at me. when i get to my lipgloss, i'm reminded of her. all these little moments we'd share, carried a new heaviness after her confession. i dab a bit of concealer under my eyes, hoping to create an illusion of peace i don't feel.

i stare at myself in the mirror, imagining finally meeting her eyes. rehearsing what i might say to her.

"i'm sorry. i should've let you finish. i feel the same way."

the words blend together in my head, like a mantra. i'm going to get it right this time.

i take a deep breath, attempting to steady my heart rate. tonight could change everything, for good this time. if she remembers, if she still wants me, i'm hers.

i'll tell her everything.

i hear a car door slam outside. she's here. a combination of fear and hope stirs in my stomach. we can make things right.

i run down the stairs to open the door. our eyes lock, and my world falls away from me. there's a flicker of recognition in her eyes, looking just as vulnerable as she did that night. her lips parted slightly, the ghost of her confession haunting her expression. her eyes soften, just for a second, before she catches herself.

"hey, az," she says, her voice a little too casual. "it's been a while."

we hug awkwardly, our bodies stiff with the burden of unspoken words. "yeah," i say into her shoulder. i'm upset with myself, i still can't find the words.

instead, i just hold her a bit tighter. a firm grip on her shirt, i feel her heartbeat race against my chest. for a moment, i think she might pull away, but then i feel it—her finger, tracing down my spine, dancing over my vertebrae through the soft fabric of my sweater.

just when i begin to melt into her touch, she pulls back, holding me at arm's length. when we part, there's a soft pink flush in her cheeks that wasn't there before. she flashes me an awkward smile, raising her eyebrows slightly, before leaving to greet my family.

does she remember? is this her way of telling me?

we held on for a moment too long, our embraces lingering past the point of a casual greeting. i'm left standing right where she left me, my skin still tingling where she'd touched. the motion of her fingers, like morse code on my spine, a message i'm desperate to decode.

i watch as she effortlessly charms my family, slipping back into the role as their favorite. the floor buzzes underneath my feet with an undercurrent of tension.

paige belongs here, she always has.

at dinner, we sit next to each other, our elbows almost touching. i swear these chairs were not this close together when i set the table.

as everyone settles in, an uncomfortable silence falls upon the table. i catch my dad shooting my mom a look, gesturing for her to say something. she returns the look, annoyed, then looks down at her plate. she opens her mouth to speak but my grandma cuts her off.

"azzi, honey, you never bring any nice boys around. haven't met anyone special yet?" she smiles between mouthfuls.

boys? huh.

paige nearly chokes on her food, a smirk flickering across her lips. regaining her composure, she glances at me, holding in a laugh. her eyes are wide, filled with anticipation, eager for my response.

she can't help herself, chiming in, "yeah, azzi. no cute boys catching your eye?" her voice drips with mock innocence. i catch her tongue rolling against the inside of her cheek, a gesture of pure arrogance. she tilts her head to the side, eyes searching my face.

god, she looks hot when she's being cocky like this.

"i been...busy. you know how it gets in college," i avoid her eyes, careful not to let my thoughts show. but inside, i'm screaming.

i do have someone special. she's sitting right next to me.

my grandma doesn't let up, clearly amused by the topic. "come on, a pretty girl like you? what about that nice boy from the men's team?"

i feel a heat burn through my face, spreading down my neck. i bounce my leg anxiously, trying to find a way to change the topic.

she continues, "i'm just saying, honey. love is a beautiful thing." her eyes shift to paige now. "you shouldn't let it pass you by," she examines our response.

i look up to meet her eyes, attempting to speak up again, when i feel it suddenly. paige's hand rests on my thigh, a bit higher than my knee, slowing my nervous shake to a stop. the placement feels almost suggestive, more intimate than our usual touch.

my breath catches for a moment, and i become aware of the warmth of her palm against my skin. she speaks with her hands, for the second time tonight, stroking her thumb in a sweet, yet somewhat possessive gesture. she gives me a reassuring squeeze before speaking up.

"she brings me around, am i not special, grandma fudd?" paige interjects, pouting; her voice playful but sincere.

she speaks with intention and a hint of something—protection? possession?

my grandma's face lights up like this was the reaction she's wanted the whole time. "oh, of course you are, sweetheart." her eyes darting between us, "i've always thought you two share something very...unique."

the way she says the word 'unique' makes my stomach flip. had she seen it all this time? had everyone seen it? were we the last two to notice?

paige's hand remains on my thigh, a comforting weight. i cover her hand with mine, squeezing gently. a silent thank you.

the rest of dinner goes smoothly, chatting about old memories and stories. i'm desperate to know what's going through paige's mind. i notice the little things:

the way our hands brush when she passes me the salt, our fingers meeting for a moment too long.

the stolen glances when she thinks i'm not looking. the way her eyes flutter when i catch her looking.

how she stumbles over her words when they ask about our last hangout, avoiding eye contact.

the way she tenses up when our knees touch underneath the table, but she doesn't move away.

each moment is a contradiction of the last. her actions are a slow waltz—a push and pull between familiarity and distance. by the end of the night, i'm convinced she remembers. but something inside her keeps pushing it away.

i don't wanna pretend anymore.

after a few hours of this, i know i can't let this continue for much longer. we need to talk, really talk. and soon.

paige's pov:

"can we talk?" azzi's voice is soft and hesitant. my heart skips a beat, a familiar palpitation i've felt around her for years.

i nod, following her up the familiar stairs to her childhood bedroom. the staircase is lined with family photos, filled with memories i've been trying so hard to forget—or pretend to forget.

how can i truly forget when azzi's smile in these pictures makes my chest tighten? she's been missing from my heart for years, it swells at the thought of her.

azzi shuts the door behind us gently, my eyes scan her bedroom. it hasn't changed much, still leaking with her personality. her bedroom walls are covered in photos of us, a tapestry of memories.

i catch sight of an old film camera. azzi's grandma had given it to us right before i moved to storrs. the sight of it brings a rush of emotions from that night i'm not prepared for.

"you still have this?" i ask, lifting the camera. it feels heavier than i anticipated, or maybe i just feel weak under azzi's gaze.

she unravels me in just a few blinks.

her eyes soften, "yeah, of course. we used to take that thing everywhere."

my heart aches at the memory—taking the camera to games, practices, summer trips. i liked the challenge of capturing her beauty between tiny frames of film. though, no photo could ever truly capture the extent of her allure, i had fun trying. i'll always be her photographer, and she'll always be my perfect model.

"do you remember the first roll we ever shot on here?" i tilted the camera, my voice softer than i intended.

"yeah," she says, pointing to a set of photos on the left side of her wall.

i lean in to look at a photo of myself, mouth full of azzi's grandmas' cookies. i'm smiling at the camera, my happiness driven by azzi standing on the other side of the lens.

we were so young.

as i look at the photo, memories flood back. azzi watches my expression, noticing my composure change. "we captured some good memories that night..." she trails off, deep in thought.

like our first kiss.

that was probably one of the best decisions i've ever made. the memory washes over me, warm and bittersweet. the softness of her lips, the slight tremor in her breath. we were so young, so nervous, yet so sure in that moment.

it was simple then. our feelings existed in the small space between our lips, protected from the outside world. i didn't have to put words to the flutter in my chest or the warmth in my cheeks.

loving azzi was as natural as breathing, just as essential too.

i miss the simplicity of it all. i could love her without the burden of expectation. i'd prove it to her eagerly, in everything i did. holding her hair back when she drank too much. folding her clothes cause she hated doing laundry. reading her favorite books, desperate to understand her mind.

our love was in the details—the way she'd adjust my form in practice, save the last of her favorite snacks for me, read to me so i could fall asleep.

loving her has always been the easiest thing. it's everything else that's gotten so complicated.

i want someone, something to blame for this. is this just how things get as you age? the simplicity of love becoming frustratingly far away. maybe it was time, the pressure of sports, or maybe this was bound to happen. maybe we were always meant to put words to these feelings—to call it out boldly by it's name.

maybe it's time.

everything from that night reappears in my mind, this time under a different lens. the thoughtful box of memories azzi gave me that night—had she felt the same way all this time?

i glance at azzi, noticing a sudden change in her expression. she looks like she's just remembered something important, her eyes widening slightly. she starts to pick at her fingers nervously, avoiding eye contact.

"hey, paige?" azzi asks, still looking down at her hands. "did you ever finish that book i gave you that night?" her voice brimmed with nervousness. she radiated an emotion i couldn't quite place, clinging to my response like it will save her from her feelings.

i shake my head, feeling a little guilty. "not quite. i saved the last chapter."

i learned that from her actually. the way she cherished the things she loved, always saving them for the right time.

azzi's eyes light up, a mixture of relief and anticipation washing over her. "you should read it," she says quickly, her voice carrying an urgency that confused me.

she hesitates before continuing, her eyes closing for a moment in a long blink. "about the other night, when you said..."

my body goes cold. my drunken confession. i panic, the fear of confronting my feelings overwhelms me.

what if she's just trying to let me down easy? what if i misread everything?

"oh, yeah?" i force out a laugh. "i hope i didn't say anything too embarrassing, you know how i get when i drink."

i can't risk it again. i'm sorry, azzi.

azzi's face falls slightly, but she quickly masks it. her eyelids flutter, she stares at the floor. i can see the thoughts flickering through her mind. she sees right through me.

"no, no you weren't embarrassing," her voice lowering to a whisper. she locks eyes with me now, intent on making me hear her. "you were actually quite...poetic."

i'm no poet, i was just speaking from the heart.

i swallow hard, knowing she's giving me another opportunity. but i resist, remembering the pity in her eyes that night. "poetic, huh? that doesn't sound like drunk me at all," i joke weakly.

azzi narrows her eyes at me, tilting her head to the side. "you don't remember anything at all?" she questions.

i refuse to meet her gaze, "it's all pretty fuzzy, az."

i'm lying, and we both know it. but i can't bear to see that look of pity in her eyes again.

she takes a deep breath, clearly frustrated. she mutters an "okay" underneath her breath.

the sound of rain pattering against the window fills the silence between us. i hadn't even noticed the storm brewing outside, too caught up in the storm of emotions in this room.

"listen, it's getting late i should go," i say, my voice strained like i'd been screaming, even though i hadn't said anything at all.

as i turn to leave, azzi calls out, her voice soft yet determined. "paige, you can talk to me...when you're ready."

god, she's still so sweet to me. i don't deserve it, not now.

i pause at the door, guilt coursing through me. i know she sees through my lie, knows i remember everything. she knew the moment i stepped foot into this house. she could see it in the softness in my eyes, feel it beneath my fingertips.

"thanks, az," i whisper, before walking down the stairs.

for a moment, i'm tempted. to stay, to talk, to finally be honest. but the fear of getting rejected again, of ruining what we have, is too strong.

katie stopped me as i headed for the door, "leaving already?" she looks a bit sad. "it's pouring out there, why don't you stay the night?"

and share a bed with azzi? after that conversation, absolutely not.

"thanks, but i'll be fine. it's not far," i insist, grabbing my keys.

as i head for the door, i catch a glimpse of azzi's face. hurt, confusion, and something else—disappointment?—flash across her features. but i can't stay.

i step out into the rain, letting it mask the tears threatening to leak out of my eyes. my hands shake as i fumble with my car keys, nearly dropping them in a puddle.

i'm doing the right thing.

the mantra echoes in my mind as i slide into the driver's seat, but it rings hollow. i grip the steering wheel, willing myself to believe it.

i can't let my feelings for her get in the way of our friendship. i'd be selfish to put my emotions over our relationship again. i'd be anything she wants me to be—even if that's just a friend.

i'm doing the right thing.

i turn the key into the ignition, reversing out of her driveway. the intensity of the storm matching the turmoil in my heart as i drive away, leaving azzi and the truth behind.

i can't be wrong again. i can't bear the thought of her letting me down easy, telling me she doesn't feel the same.

i'm doing the right thing.

back at home, my guilt eats its way through my stomach. a relentless ache that promises a sleepless night. my eyes drift to my nightstand, where a worn copy of looking for alaska rests- the book azzi gave me years ago.

sometimes when i'd sleepover at her place, i'd pretend like i couldn't sleep so she could read to me. her voice soothing like a lullaby, i lost myself between her breaths. heavy and melodic, her cadence became my cough syrup, drifting me to sleep.

i flip open to the final chapter, determined to finally finish the book. memories flood back, the way her words coated my thoughts, i can almost hear it now, as i start to read.

i've put this off for so long. terrified of the ending, the finality of a precious memory between azzi and i. saving the final chapter for the right moment. maybe that moment is now.

as i turn the last page, a small slip of paper flutters out. simple yet somehow charged with potential. i unfolded the paper, recognizing the handwriting immediately.

azzi.

my heart pounds as i begin to read. the first few words hook me in, something all too familiar. my breath quickens, my lungs expanding like i'm breathing for the first time.

i didn't need to find the words, she already had. years ago.

by the time i finish, my hands are shaking. the room spins slightly. in a strange paradox of emotions. her words lifted a weight from my chest, stirring a whirlwind of emotions. yet simultaneously, a new weight settles on my shoulders—the gravity of what i need to do now.

how long had this been there? sitting on my nightstand, packed in a suitcase, tucked into a bookshelf. how many times have i almost read this, almost known?

i guess we've both been hiding something.

i leaped from my bed, grabbing my keys, slamming the door behind me. i was exhausted seconds ago, but now, sleep is the furthest thing from my mind. i need to see her. to talk to her. to make it real.

we've wasted too much time already.

[berryz-writes]

Faking it

(part 1)

Mattheo x reader

Summary: You and Mattheo pretend to date because your parents won't stop pestering you and girls won't stop falling over themselves to get to Mattheo

note: ignore the title its not very.........smart

"What are your plans for tomorrow?" Mattheo asked putting his quill down and kicking his legs up onto the desk. History of Magic was the perfect time to sit and chat with your friends and catch up on missed gossip.

I shrugged "It's the ball tomorrow so probably getting lectured by my dear mother" A tradition since I was 12. To nag ask me to bring a date with me to the ball. This year was especially important because I hadn't brought anyone with me last year and my mother was not impressed.

Mattheo rolled his eyes "Please. You've got it easy"

I raised an eyebrow. What was he complaining about? "And what's troubling you so much?"

He sighed dramatically "All I here is everywhere I go is do you have a date for the ball? A guy can't even eat breakfast in peace"

I scoffed. He was always so unnecessarily dramatic.

"Well. Do you?" It's not like I was wanting it to be me, I was just genuinely interested. Curious. Not at all wondering who the girl was and what Matheo's standards and type was.

"Of course I don't. All the girls that come up to me are sluts who want me to take them to my dorm after"

I shrug "At least they have the confidence to ask. You'll be left with no one soon enough"

Mattheo rolled his eyes as if what I was saying was utterly ridiculous "There's always someone. And anyways I could always go with you"

I paused. The voices in the classroom had become a background noise in my mind. I looked at Mattheo, trying to see if he was making a joke out of all this. I could usually tell because of how his lips would always pull into a small smirk but this time he was utterly serious.

"Us two?" I asked. I don't know why I said that. Maybe it was to make sure I had heard him right.

"Yeah. It would get those girls off my back and your parents will probably be happy you've found a good looking guy like me"

I rolled my eyes, trying to act like this wasn't something I was excited about or wanted to do "Someone thinks highly of themselves"

Matheo's eyes had glazed over as if he was in deep thought about something. His hand was tapping his knee in a constant rhythm and his eyebrows were scrunched in concentration. It was quiet cute to watch, honestly.

"Y'know. My idea wasn't so bad."

I raise an eyebrow "Your ideas are always bad. Which one are you talking about this time?"

He moved closer to me so I could hear his quiet voice "Me and you. We could go to the ball together. Pretend to date for a while and then act like it didn't work out between us."

My heart beat's pace increased. Why was it increasing? I'd love to tell you but I didn't know either. Maybe it was the fact that I wouldn't mind getting closer to Mattheo. Or maybe the fact that I knew if I accepted his idea I would be heartbroken by the end of it.

"But once we break up I'm just going to have to find another guy" I tried explaining. I did want to go along with his idea but I didn't want to seem too desperate. Also I don't think my parents saw Mattheo as a great influence.

He rolled his eyes acting as if I was the dumb one "Just pretend your going through an emotional...breakdown or something. And by then you'll be able to find someone you like.  It's not as if anyone would reject you" He said all this with a serious tone, as if he wasn't telling me to keep a lie going to my family but also probably break my heart in the process. I skipped over the last bit of what he said because if I thought of it for too long I would become obsessed with it and that probably wasn't a good idea.

"I'll think about it" I finally decided. I already knew what my answer was but I didn't need his ego to inflate even more...also because I had pride in myself and wasn't about to cave to on of his ideas so quickly.

*a few hours later*

"Why do you ask to play if you know your going to lose?" I asked Theo feeling slightly bad for him at this point. It was our fifth game of cards and he had lost all of them. He rolled his eyes "I'm helping pass time so you should be thanking me" It was just after our last lesson of the day and we were all in the common room or out in the gardens waiting for supper. Luckily exams weren't anywhere close so I could use this time however I wanted.

I smiled slightly at Theo's disgruntled expression "Right"

Handing out the cards again I picked up my pile and spread them out looking for a diamond. I picked out two debating on which one, choosing the nine of diamonds when I heard a slight noise behind me.

"I wouldn't go for that. I've seen Theo's cards and he's going to get you back if you put that nine down" It was Mattheo. He had taken a seat next to me on a stool having seemingly finished the shouting match he was having with Draco a few minutes ago.

I glared at him in annoyance "You've just told Theo what card I have!" Was he being deliberately annoying or did he not know how card games worked?

A slight smirk on his expression told me he was being irritating on purpose "Don't be mad at me darling. It was a mistake" He had gotten closer to me now his proximity too much for me. Luckily Theo caused a commotion by throwing his cards onto the table, me and Mattheo both turning to look at him.

"I'm not playing anymore. I've had enough of losing y/n" He said dramatically, getting up and sticking up his middle finger at Mattheo before leaving. What was wrong with everyone today?

Mattheo let out a sigh "Finally. Have you decided then?" His voice had changed to being serious within seconds, his teasing smile gone.

I knew what he was talking about but all the same I furrowed my brows and acted confused "decided what?" It was his turn to frown as he moved even closer to me "The fake dating thing? Your memory needs fixing sweetheart" He said quietly waiting for my response.

I closed my eyes and took a deep breath. I couldn't look him in the eyes when he said names like that. Would saying yes lead to me having a broken heart and in a lot of trouble if my parents found out? Yes. But was I doing it anyways? Yes.

"My memory doesn't need fixing" I rolled my eyes but continued on "And fine I'll do it"

Mattheo grinned "Fucking finally" He got up and pressed a kiss to my cheek "I'll see you later. If anyone asks tell them your taken" He walked away out of the common room and to who knows where. I lightly touched where he had kissed my cheek. Was this going to be normal now? Him just kissing me any time of day? Not that I minded.

I looked around the common room to see a few girls in my year already walking over to me, raising their eyebrows. They were probably going to ask what the kiss was about and I'd have to tell them I was dating..... realisation hit me.

Mattheo hadn't kissed me because he wanted to but so the others could see and would come and ask me. He was smart. I would give him that but it did hurt my feelings slightly.

After a lot of explaining how me and Mattheo got together and lying for three hours straight I slipped into my bed earlier than usual, staring at my dress for the next night. It was a dark green almost the exact shade of our Slytherin robes except in silk. I turned to my other side wishing I hadn't eaten so much dessert because it still didn't seem digested to me. I could hear hooting in the distance, guessing it was probably other students owls, coming back or going out to send letters.

I had sent a letter to my parents just after dinner, telling them not to worry and how I had a date for the ball this year. I had re written the letter so many times, worried the expression when they read my words would make it obvious I was lying. After the fire had eaten up 4 parchments I finally sent the letter off hoping for the best. Pansy had ended up reading over my shoulder before I could stop her and had found out I was "dating" Mattheo. At first she was upset I hadn't told her. Her arms had been crossed and a permanent frown had been etched onto her face.

I couldn't lie to her so I eventually told her the truth, her eyes widening as I explained everything.

"I'm sure it'll be fine" She had said eventually. I hoped she was right.

The next day rushed by extremely quickly. It felt like I had just had breakfast but here I was waiting for my mother to show up. She had said she wanted to "meet me before she left for something extremely important in a different country"

She just meant she was going on holiday without me but I didn't mind. The last time I had gone all she did was talk about my grades and the clothes I was wearing or something else that annoyed me. I turned to Pansy who was starting to look at her nails in boredom.

"You should go. Start getting ready" I said to her. She was waiting with me, just inside the school gates. Pansy shrugged "I don't mind. You need support when your dear mother comes because Salazar knows you can't lie"

I crossed my arms even though I knew she was kind of right "I can. Listen I'll be fine, trust me. Go get ready"

Pansy hummed in thought "It does take me a while to do my eyeliner.....fine. See you, don't crumble under pressure" She blew me a kiss and walked back in leaving me to crack my knuckles repeatedly even though they were already cracked.

I couldn't even wait in peace because as soon as Pansy left I heard gravel crunch behind me and when I turned to look who it was, Mattheo's grin made me want to stop time. God he was gorgeous and he didn't even try.

"What are you doing here?" I asked as he stood next to me, his body heat reaching me at his close proximity. He raised an eyebrow a knowing smile on his lips "You can't lie to me forget lying to your own mother"

I huffed in annoyance. Why did everyone underestimate me? I mean they were right but still. And how could I lie to Mattheo when his chocolate eyes would make me melt in mere seconds? And how did he know what I was waiting for? Pansy must have told him on her way in.

Without warning my mother apparated in front of me before I could confirm what I was thinking. She was wearing smart wizarding robes. She had probably just come from work. Like usual she didn't hug me, just giving me a once over and then turning to Mattheo instead.

"So your dating my daughter?" She got straight to the point, tossing her blonde waves behind her, eyes narrowed. Mattheo nodded his expression serious

"Yes maam"

Her eyebrows raised slightly but she carried on quizzing him about his grades, plans and even what he thought about marriage. I wanted to die right about now. Luckily she only turned to me at the very end of her little interview "I expect you to have good grades by the end of the year. Your father sends his love" And with that she apparated away just as quickly as she had arrived.

I let out a sigh "Thanks. She's a handful sometimes" I told him, feeling bad that he had to take the brunt of her questioning. He shrugged wrapping an arm around my waist "It's fine, nothing I can't handle"

"You don't have to pretend like we're dating when no one's looking you know" I said to him quietly. It was getting dark now and no one would be out in the gardens anyways. Mattheo ignored me, carrying on walking toward the castle, his hand shifting to pull me closer

"Someone could be looking though the window, sweetheart. You can't be too careful" He whispered in my ear, his voice making my insides heat and my legs feel like jelly. I blinked at him as he straightened up acting as if he hadn't just made butterflies erupt in my stomach from a few simples words.

FUCK. FUCK. FUCK.

I couldn't survive one night next to him without my brain cells melting how would I survive a whole fucking week?

[byechristopher]

can u do a fic where chris and reader are dating but reader gets insecure because she sees all these old pics and vids of chris with this girl he used to be with but they talk about it and they say to each other they're in love for the first time this is bad sorry but i'm lowkey sad and need this

Trust Me.

– CHRIS STURNIOLO FLUFF.

Author's note: Hey there, thank you for the request! Now, I didn't know how to bring up the old photos, so y e s, I used snapchat memories (happened to me, so..). I hope you like it either way. 🤍 Do not copy/steal my work. :)

Warnings: None, sliiight angst. Did not proofread!

Usually, I'm not one to stare at people, but when it comes to Chris, I can never resist, even when he's doing the simplest tasks. We've only been dating for a couple of months, and while I wouldn't label myself as "obsessed," I find myself captivated by him.

My thoughts are interrupted by Chris (not that I mind) as I sit on the pavement, and he bends over to gently kiss the top of my head, his hands cupping my cheeks. I smile and grasp his hands, looking up at him to see his beautiful smile.

"Beautiful day today, huh?" he says, sitting down beside me, his head tilted back, soaking in the sunshine.

I gaze at him, appreciating the way the sun highlights his curls, makes his skin glow, and brings out the pink in his lips and the icy blue of his eyes. God.

"Yes, very beautiful," I chuckle, joining him in looking up at the sky, letting the sun caress my face as well.

"I'm gonna go take a shower. I'll be back in a few minutes, okay?" he smiles and wraps an arm around my shoulders, bringing me closer to him so that he can press a kiss on my cheek.

"Yes, yes. Can I play that game on your phone?" I grin, knowing he is not able to resist that and he chuckles, giving me his phone.

"Here you go, babe."

He leaves and I immediately unlock his phone. I want to start the game but a notification from snapchat pops up and I accidentally press on it. I roll my eyes because it is one of these "memories" thingies, it said two years ago.

When it opens, my stomach drops. A few pictures and a video of Chris and his ex girlfriend are under this notification. I know I shouldn't feel anything but I do. Especially when I see how tightly he's holding her, the way he looks into her eyes. The video is my last straw – he's cupping her cheeks while pressing kisses all over her face, saying over and over again how much he loves her. He sounds very genuine. He's never told me he loves me. Ouch.

I quickly close the app and lock his phone, not in the mood to play any of the games on his phone anymore. I can't fathom my emotions – perhaps because I've already fallen for him, and the fact that he might not love me just yet triggers an unsettling feeling within me. Not a positive one.

I go back inside the apartment because I am not in the mood to enjoy any type of sunshine either, so when he's done and he doesn't see me there, he gets confused.

"Babe? Where are you?" his shouts reach me, and I take a deep breath, wondering whether I should tell him anything or just leave it be.

"Hey, I'm up here." I say, standing on top of the stairs as I look down at him.

His smile brightens and he starts walking up the stairs to meet me – he's got a fresh hoodie on now, his hair is damp and the fact that he looks like the cutest human being on earth doesn't help with the fact that I want to cry.

"Why'd you leave? I thought you wanted to stay outside for a while," he questions, pulling me close for a kiss.

"Yeah, just not in the mood," I shrug, failing to force a smile before heading to the bedroom.

"Babe." he follows, concerned, "is there something wrong?" he furrows his eyebrows in confusion.

"No.. just.. everything's fine." I realise how stupid I will sound if I say anything so now I am just stuck with my mood swings.

"You know you can tell me everything, yes?" he gets on his knees right in front of me as I'm sitting on the edge of the bed, placing his hands on my thighs and giving them a small reassuring squeeze.

I look down at him, then down to my fingers, really considering telling him now. With a small sigh, I cover my face with both hands, "I accidentally opened your snapchat memories." I say, really getting embarrassed now, "and it was you.. with.. yeah."

I can hear him sighing as well, knowing what I'm talking about, but he doesn't say anything for a while. Instead, he grabs my hands gently pulling them away from my face, bringing them both close to his lips so he can kiss them.

"Baby.. you know this means absolutely nothing now, right?" his voice is so sweet and gentle, like honey, it makes me want to cry.

"I know.. please, I just.. I don't know why I'm feeling this way." I know exactly why I'm feeling that way but I would never tell him that, he'd be so uncomfortable. Especially if he doesn't love me back just yet.

"It's normal, I think I would feel the same way if I saw you with your ex." he nods, still pressing kisses to the palms of my hands, "but you need to know that you're the only one I see. For a very long time now." his eyes look sincere as he makes sure to keep eye contact with me no matter how much I avoid it.

I don't say anything, I only nod – he gets up and quickly picks me up, making me wrap my legs around his waist as he sits at the edge of the bed with me in his lap this time. His hands touch me everywhere, my thighs, my waist, my back, my hair – his touch is feather-like, it feels dreamy.

"You know, baby.." he speaks with his gentle voice, "..I might not talk about my feelings as much as you do, but that doesn't mean I don't feel as much as you do." he buries his hand in my hair, his lips close to my ear, pressing kisses there and on my cheek.

I don't have the time to say anything because he continues, "I'm very, very bad when it comes to expressing my feelings, I think you know that by now." he chuckles a bit, making me smile a little bit, "but what I'm feeling for you, I don't think I've ever experienced before." he says and I don't want to get my hopes up but my heart definitely does something, "the moment I saw you, I knew. And that scared me. The fact that my heart felt something, by just looking at you."

I pull back just a bit to look at him, his hands now cupping my cheeks, caressing my skin, "and still to this day, even after all these months, I still feel the same way I felt when I first saw you." he presses his forehead against mine, kissing my lips every now and then, "I am.. madly in love with you, baby." he whispers and I almost widen my eyes.

"What–" only this word comes out of my mouth but I want to grab him and kiss him and tell him a million things. But nothing else comes out and my heart starts beating fast, like crazy.

"Yes. I am sorry if it's too soon for you. But I wanted to say it to you since like.. the first month. I just didn't want you to think of me as a weirdo.." he chuckles and I chuckle, too, "and anyway, you know I don't necessarily like expressing my feelings but sometimes it is necessary for the both of us."

"I am in love with you too.." I smile, my arms wrapping around his neck to bring him even closer to me, "and I have been for a while now." I whisper against his lips.

"Shit. You're doing it again.." he whispers, his smile so big, "the thing. My heart." he whispers again and I laugh softly.

"Stop. I love you." I say and my heart feels at peace.

He smiles, wrapping his arms around my waist again, hugging me close before kissing me again, "I love you too."

[clus444]

The Mall

Simon Riley x Bimbo!reader

This is a Simon Riley introduction to my page. The reader is described as black but anyone can read. This took a minute to post because I had work and I didn't know a good situation. But anywayyys...Enjoy! Outfit inspo!!!

"He had the nerve to tell me that I need to get a grip on life," I speak into the phone. My friend Sasha snorts on the line. I roll my eyes a little bit at the sound of her laugh. I'm trying to tell this girl my problems and she playing. I stop and look at an outfit displayed in the window on a mannequin.

"Girl you need to kick this man to the curb. Hang up on you...not in the mood.," She mimics that TikTok sound. I laugh out loud at that as the jean two-piece rings around my mind. There are endless possibilities for outfits that can come out of this. The gold belt really pulls the outfit together. I smile brightly as a decision is made up in my mind. I get ready to text the man-child that is my boyfriend.

"Shit," Is all I here before I run into a goddamn big ass stone wall. My phone falls out of my hand and I try to catch myself. Big rough hands grip my waist and firmly pull me to them then my phone does one 'fuck you' bounce on the floor to me. I shriek when I look up and see a black face mask close to my face. Not expect him to be leaning down on me.

I can swear by the way his way eyes move, there must be a smirk on his face. I quickly get out of his grasp and move to get my phone. "Jumpy little thing," His British accent catches me off guard. I look him up and down, his 6'0+ self with muscles in places I didn't even know could have muscles. His deliciously thick arms that I would let wrap around me any day. "You're British," I state turning my head up to look him in the face.

He stares blankly for a second, "Am I?" I nod to his question and look at him funny.

"Your accent? Did you forget you have one," I question him and lean my weight on my hip and cross my arms. His mask protrudes a little so I assume he's licking his lips. I have no proof but, by the way his eyes flash what seems to be lust for a split second. Maybe he's a murder and he checking to see if I'm a good victim. I scare myself slightly.

His deep scratchy voice blesses my ears again," What's going on in that little head of yers?"

I finick a French curl braid between my fingers and sway my body a little," I'm trying to figure out what they fed you overseas. I've never seen any Brits look like you," I pause," Kinda like... Hansel on steroids."

He raises a brow at me before turning his expression neutral again. This man radiates that he's emotionally constipated. Lowkey kinda my type apparently since I'm still with Chris. That fucking asshole! The audacity, the courage, the-

He pushes the braid behind my ear and I turn shy. A smile creeps onto my face and I hope it doesn't have fuck me written on them. Ugh! Why Do I feel like this man can see right through me? His eyes...they feel different, something I can't quite place my finger on. But I'm not even sure I want to find out.

"Do yuh think of shit like tha all the time," what appears to be amusement in his tone," I'm Simon."

I place a hand on my chest," I'm Y/n."

"I can take yuh out this Saturday," He interrupts my thoughts. His tone is a matter of faculty. I clear my throat as I take in his words. I'm not shallow but this looks like a ain't shit ni-. Damn, this sucks to do but...

"I have a boyfr-" I try to get out but he quickly shuts that down.

"Dont remember askin'. But 'ell you can bring yer, little boyfriend if yuh want, makes no difference to me," he takes his phone out. Which by god I pity. It looks like it doesn't know what brighter days are. The cracks look like they should be slicing his fingers. But as he slides open his lock screen, he looks back at me.

I bite my lip as girly giggles come out and I give out my number," Don't forget to text me the details." What the hell am I doing? I'm not single so why the fuck am I giving my number out. This feels bad- no wrong but I also can't deny the butterflies in my stomach. I really hope for both of our sake he's not a criminal or something.

I bid him goodbye as I walked deeper into the mall. "Hel- motherfucking- lo? Can you hear me hoe," Sasha's muffled voice comes through.

I quickly pull the phone to my ear," Sash? You still here?" She huffs out loudly and I giggle. This is literally my bitch because who else would stay on the phone. "Why didn't you hang up?"

"WELLL I heard a loud ass crack noise and I guess when you picked the phone up, I heard this clear deep...raspy...sexy-" I cut her off.

"Stand up! You don't even know what this man looks like," I say in replacement of whatever she was going to say. She laughs exaggeratedly and annoyingly.

"WHAT I DO KNOW IS YOU BETTA GO ON THAT DATE! FUCK WANNABE ASS CHRISTOPHER," she yells and I hang up the phone.

I'm not finna let her wild ass keep yelling in my ear. She's literally crazy but I guess that's why are friends. My name and sane have never been in the same sentence before.

I continue to shop but with new energy, some would say a slight pep in my step. A new mission added to my list.

-Get a date night outfit.

A little short but thats because I wanted to work on part two and this other thing I'm creating.. I will have a nice little surprise, some would say chaotic. Also let me know if this was bimbo enough or not

Next Part

Masterlist

[megamindsecretlair]

First of all Happy New Years and how’re you doin?? I really hope you’re doin well and thriving and your loved ones are doin the same❤️

Second of all I had a thought while high that I needa get out:

Imma mess for domestic Taine. Just takin care of his woman an shit. He likes takin care of her mental load and just truly makin her feel relaxed an shit. Which brings me to his hands….he’s so beefy wit protective ass arms and he’s just ugh🤌 like imagine you had a trash ass day (school, work, family, etc) an he just caresses and massages you, tryna soften you up so youn gotta gts upset or stressed. Lights candles, brings out ya favorite oils/lotions, he even rolls a blunt for you both. He’s givin you deep tissue booty/thigh rubs and ik for a fact his strength channeled through his fingers would make me all mushy an shit….

Along that thought, he can’t help (an youn stop him) but spread ya cheeks a bit, just ta peek at ya folds, only ta see em all gushy an shit. That was a mistake because now he reeeally can’t help himself. You’re all pliable under him and he dips his fingers into ya folds “just ta taste” he tells himself. But he’s dippin into you again…and again…and again till he just says fuck it and devours you from the back. I’m talkin the messy, droolin, beard shiny a shit typa pussy eatin. You just cease to exist cuz he feels too too good. Taine is just maneuvering/manhandling your body any which way and you’re loving it, you’re loving your man. And What were you upset bout again? It’s out the window now.

Phew, glad I got that outta my system🤭

Happy New Year! Many blessings to you and ya fam! I'm getting over Covid. That is the literal devil and I'm glad to be on the other side!

And secondly...why you aint on here writing with the rest of us? Tuh. This was hot and complete all by its lonesome, you don't need me for this one, lordt!

Re-reading and re-reading all night because I, too, want that gorgeous man's big mitts on me.

If You Please

Word Count: 691

A/N: Finally a little drabble! I still write a lot but ya'll caught me on a feral night. There's no big warnings besides oral (fem receiving) and Fontaine being a horny mess. This ask was everything. Not sure if you wanted me to add to it, but couldn't help myself! Excuse me while I go re-read and re-read and re-read.

Taglist: @planetblaque @dayjlovesromance @sevikasblackgf @melaninpov @amyhennessyhouse @henneseyhoe @honeyoriginalz @justheretostan @black-fairy3 @superhoeva @jarfulloftears @hereformiles @montysstuffs @westside-rot @blackerthings @blowmymbackout @euphoric05 @miyuhpapayuh @nicolexnight @8ttached @judymfmoody @notapradagurl7 @wakandas-vibranium @soft-persephone @justabovewater20 @mcotton0928 @soapjay @heyauntieeee @theyscreamsannii @mybonafidefeelings @eggnox @honeytoffee @thadelightfulone @tranquilfandomer @kindofaintrovert @l-auteuse @browngirldominion @sunkissedebony97 @lovedlover @issahyland @nerdieforpedro @longpause-awkwardsmile @insburner @slippinninque @thecookiebratz @we-outsiiiide

And Fontaine is the type to take his time because HE wants to take his time. Because HE can't keep his hands off of you. If you had a bad day? That's okay, he'll work that shit out. Had a good day? He wants to pick you up and taste the happiness from your lips.

But a particularly bad day? Oh, he already had the bath running and candles lit while you talked to him on the way home. How you wanted him to show up with a helicopter and transport you home because you were dog tired. Tiredt!

And after your bath, he does all the work. He dries you off and lays kisses all over your face and body while he towels you down. Leads you to the bed where he lays out a fresh warm towel from the dryer. Makes you lay on your back first so he can rub lotion and smell good into your deep brown skin.

Take his time to work the body cream onto your arms, shoulders, stomach. Smooth it around your breasts because he just can't resist touching you. He rubs the top of your legs, really working his thick fingers into your thighs and finding all these tension knots you didn't know were there.

Then he asks you to flip over and you are putty in his hands. Free to mold you in his arms. To play with your hips and valleys and treasure the canvas God gave him. He rubs your back and your legs. But your ass.

Fontaine is an ass man. Nothin' sweeter than seeing those two big ol' cheeks begging to be claimed by those hands of his. It's so much he can't hold it all. But he loves trying. He loves trying to cup each cheek to see how much he can hold before your ass spills over. He loves to massage your ass.

He loves to watch the grooves and dimples he makes in your ass. The little glimpses of your pussy when he spreads your cheeks are a torture all their own. Got him bricked up and mouth droolin' just from that alone. His tongue glides over his golden grills as he can remember the last time he ate you out, just last night. How pliable and verbal you were.

One little taste won't hurt right? It's your body, he wants you to feel good all over. What better stress relief, right? He wipes his hands on the towel. He can't resist digging his fingers in and suppressing a groan at finding you wet as hell. He knew his hands on you turned you on, but not like this!

Now he really can't resist bringing your sweet essence to his lips and licking his fingers. He can't stop at one taste. Once he tasted you, he had to keep diving in for more. And more until you were sighing and moaning just the way he liked.

"Too tired," you mumbled.

"Too tired to lay there, mama?" He asked.

You couldn't argue with that logic. He didn't need anything back. He just wanted to make you feel good. Making you feel good, made him feel good. And he already got his reward. He was lifting your hips, spreading you wide, and placing his mouth against your pussy and suckling like a starving man to nectar.

He couldn't help groaning and rocking his own hips into the bed, wishing he could flip you over and fuck you. But he wasn't going to be that greedy. He could give. He could give and give until you were a shaking, trembling mess beneath his tongue. Hands splayed on your ass, spreading you open and wide for him.

His nasty little slurps filled the air. His desperate pulls for air blowing against your dripping pussy. Your weak arms grasping the pillow and pulling it close while you came in his mouth. Gushing and dripping all that succulent arousal.

Well, you weren't that tired anymore. As much as you left your job bone tired and weary, unsure how you could possibly go another day, you always found solace in 'Taine's arms.

The Secret Tyrone Files - there's always more!

[raven-at-the-writing-desk]

I don't know if it's just me, but do some of the events seem... I don't know... Lacking? It might just be me having high standards, but more than once it seems like there was a build up for something that didn't meet the hype, or the event simply didn't go the way I thought it should. Do you mind sharing your thoughts on this? Of course, you don't have to if you don't want to.

I don’t know how hot of a take this is, but I think most TWST events are mediocre. I'm looking for a certain type of story (ones with clear set up and pay off + actual stakes), and more often than not TWST decides to focus its events on the total opposite (being silly). I love the events where we get to visit, explore, and experience other countries, but I also fully acknowledge how dull they can be because those events are mostly eating local foods and shopping for souvenirs. Nothing wrong with stories like that, it's all just a matter of person taste. The unseriousness of events helps to balance out the meatiness of the main story, and it's nice to have that contrast.

That being said, the quality of the events is still all over the place and I think that's a natural consequence of the frequency of them. We get a new story event like every 1-2 months whereas we get a single chunk of the main story maybe once in that timeframe (or sometimes in an even longer timeframe; I still remember going more than half a year without a book 5 update). The devs may not be able to keep up the pace while also providing top tier content every single time. That's no fault of their own, it's just how the gacha model works. You need to keep pumping out new content to retain the player base and make money. We should have higher standards for the media we consume, so it's fine to critique the events and say, "it's not as good as it could have been", "this felt rushed and/or incomplete", "there was definitely a missed opportunity here", etc. What's NOT okay to do is to insult the people who worked hard on bringing the events to us. So long as you keep that mind, you're fine to express your thoughts. I'm afraid I can't really go into further detail since your initial ask was vague and did not cite any particular events you take issue with. As for myself, I know I've certainly had my fair share of complaining about how... meh... some events are. To this day, I still salt about the weird pacing and plot holes of Stage in Playful Land, the lack of satisfying payoff in Tamashina Mina, and the lack of accountability in Endless Halloween Night. I'm sure there are other events I haven't liked very much, but those are the main offenders for me.