#i don’t want to hear your shooter game or whatever the hell that is

[willow-lark]

people who don’t use headphones on public transport i am killing you killing you killing you

[parti-poppers]

what are your fav fukalen headcannons that you have?

Oh lord you don’t even know

I have far too many and I physically can’t pick favorites, so I present you; Pop’s Fukalen Headcanon Masterlist (that hasn’t been updated in a good while)

-They get into dumb stupid trouble a lot, Len cuz he’s overly confident, stubborn and stupid, and Fukase because he’s an agent of chaos

-They casually bully (not really, just tease) each other a lot

-They don’t really need to communicate to cause havoc, they just sorta catch each others dumbass brain waves

-Though Luka is the main English tutor for the Kagamines, Fukase also helps Len with his English a lot

-After Fukase has helped Len with English so much, it became a habit for Fukase to speak English to Len so that he could hear it more and learn, so though it’s not actually necessary it has become natural for them to have conversations where Len speaks Japanese and Fukase speaks English

-Fukase’s kinda jealous of Len’s dance skills but refuses to admit it, instead just saying Len’s a show off (he’s not wrong)

-They’re both gamers and play together a lot, though Fukase leans more towards shooters and Len’s a bit of a rhythm game fanatic

-They played Portal 2 together which consisted of Fukase carrying and Len fucking around bc he wasn’t built for puzzle games

-Fukase says project diva is dumb and not even a good game because he generally doesn’t like rhythm games as he tends to suck at them, but he’s secretly a hardcore project diva fan and plays it a lot

-Similarly, he complains about Sekai being cashgrab trash and just another shitty gacha game but he’s mildly addicted

-Oh and his fave module is Len’s Trickster one because then they have a matching cane and hat vibe goin’ on

-Sometimes when they’re in group chat with friends Fukase and Len will argue, and Fukase will say something like “shut up bb”, earning something like a “lmao you calling him baby that’s kinda gay” from the others, and the response is usually something along the lines of “YOU ALL KNOW ITS SHORT FOR BANANA BOY SHUT THE HELL UP”

-Len makes fun of Fukase’s overly complicated design a lot but had an edgy phase where he thought it was the peek of fashion and secretly wanted to look like him

-Len really likes Fukase’s lower range (especially when paired with his softer voice), but keeps that secret locked up and kept away from everyone and anyone

-Len assumed for ages that Fukase wore eyeliner until he did his makeup once and told him to take it off and Fukase was like “what eyeliner” and Len was like “you’re not wearing eyeliner???”

-Fukase gets super easily cold which is why he wears so many layers, meanwhile Len is that kid that walks around in a t-shirt and shorts all year around, a bit of a living heater if you will. It can either be optimal for cuddling or make it impossible, depends

-They use a lot of different nicknames for each other depending on context- usually Fukase might call Len “Banana Boy”, “Blondie”, “Twink” or “Dumbass” and Len might call Fukase “Clown” “Fuckass” “Fuka” or “Kase”. You’ll probably never catch Fukase saying “Babe” (Banana Boy > BB > Baby/Babe)or Len saying “Fukafuka” (fluffy/soft) out in the open tho

-Fukase and Flower are best friends, and Flower has a habit of giving people nicknames based on flowers. Fukase sorta picked up on this, occasionally calling Len “Buttercup”

-Every time someone asks Fukase how his face got scarred he comes up with the most wild and shocking story he can think of on the spot to get a reaction out of whoever is asking, but none of these manage to shock Len anymore because he’s heard every single one Fukase has managed to conjure up

-Fukase has multiple sorted reference, meme, quote, and random picture folders so he can send whatever he deems perfect in any given situation at any given time. Depending on context Len will more often than not know “oh this person said this, so Fuka is gonna send/show this specific thing in three, two, one- there it is”

-Whenever Len comes over to Fukase he will prioritize saying hi to Point before Fukase. Fukase‘s kinda accepted that Len likes Point more than him

-The way Len treats Point compared to the way Fukase does is night and day- Len holds it like a newborn child talking to the it like it’s a puppy, while Fuka be out here dragging it by a limb sayin “ya stinky”

-Point is their unofficial child probably

-Len likes a lot of Fukase’s original English songs, but knows his own English isn’t the best, at least not compared to Fukase’s, so he only ever jams to them and sings along in private

-Though he makes fun of it a lot, Fukase thinks Len’s English is kinda endearing, but he keeps that to himself

-Fukase has the weird ability to making insults sound like compliments, and compliments sound like insults, and Len is sick of it cuz it makes him very confused and annoyed

-Fukase speaks fluent sarcasm, meanwhile Len’s brain sometimes just short circuits and he can’t pick up on sarcasm whatsoever

-Fukase is a smartass with dumbass energy and Len is a dumbass who tries to have smartass energy (in contrast to Rin, who fully embraces her dumbassness and dumbass energy and thinks Len should too. He insists he isn’t as dumb as her and she’s like “bro you’re literally my reflection”)

-Len legit has a big ego (some describe him as mildly narcissistic) while, Fukase is just great at faking confidence and actually doesn’t think very highly of himself, though Len insists he absolutely should

-Fukase likes cracking self deprecating jokes. He does that more than your average person due to his secretly low confidence

-Len, due to his higher than average confidence, usually doesn’t find self deprecating jokes funny cuz he doesn’t relate to them, and it often takes him a second to get them. Sometimes, if he notices his friends making a lot of them, he’ll get kinda worried and be like “damn you need therapy or smthn?”

-Len sometimes aggressively delivers compliments to Fukase, or whoever he thinks needs them

-Fukase’s terrible at accepting compliments

-Len straight up started giving Fukase self love classes to teach him real confidence

-He also gives Fukase dance lessons, but Fukase usually doesn’t learn much because Len’s too busy showing off. They have fun tho

-Fukase really like when Len has his hair down

-Len’s kind of a mess in the kitchen, so when they have to prepare something themselves Fukase usually does it for the both of them

-When they’re out together they like to get milkshakes/smoothies. If both are almost broke and they gotta share, they compromise and get the banana and strawberry drink. While their fave flavors in general are banana for Len and strawberry for Fukase, they both have come to enjoy the banana and strawberry combo. Sometimes they lie to each other abt being broke just to order it and share

-Len says Wi-Fi Imagination Wild Boy is “their song” but Fukase likes to pretend it doesn’t exist and never happened out of embarrassment

-Len likes having one hand on each side of Fukase’s face because the difference in skin texture on each side feels funny. Fukase says it’s weird that he likes doing that, but doesn’t stop him from squishing his face

-Fukase always ponders how the Cryptons have perfect skin, or well, at least he knows Len does- perfect nails too, great for head scratches

-While Fuka is normally not the biggest fan of surprise physical contact, it’s kinda become a habit of Len to just randomly scratch his head or run his hand through his hair. This is an exception. If you comment on it tho, Fukase will suddenly start acting annoyed by it and smack Len’s hand away. Len teases him a bit for liking it

-Len absolutely adores how fluffy and messy Fukase’s hair is

-Fukase has his reasons for keeping his arm bandages, maybe health, convenience, not wanting to freak people out- but one is because he has a habit of picking at the skin there, which Len is trying to get him to stop doing

-Fukase’s arm picking worries Len, so sometimes he changes Fukase’s bandages for him just to make sure he won’t do it

-Len’s a trans guy and Fukase is one of the few people Len’s comfortable not binding his chest in front of, other than the other Cryptons and Piko (bc Piko’s his best friend)

-Fuka barely needs any sleep getting like 4 hours on average, while is a professional honk mimimier who likes getting his 8 hours of beauty sleep

-Because of Len’s habit of sleeping like a baby and the fact that he’s usually busy as fuck, Fukase always lets him sleep in when they have sleepovers at his place, not having the heart to wake him up

-When they have sleepovers they always end up having an argument a little while after Len starts showing signs of being tired. These basically consist of Len saying “if I go to bed now I know you’re just gonna stay up all night, get your ass to bed now or I’m staying up and annoying you while sleep deprived” and Fukase saying “you look like you’re gonna pass out and you know damn well I won’t be able to sleep for a while, go to bed or I’m carrying your sleepy ass over there“. Which of them wins varies

-Though they both frequently tease each other and are okay with teasing/being teased about pretty much anything, they also know exactly when they’re crossing a line or pushing certain buttons. Sometimes they’ll push the others buttons just a little or see how far they can go, but they always know when to stop and when the other isn’t cool with it anymore

-Fukase adores the horror genre as a whole, while Len’s more easily freaked out but pretends like he has no fear- so, when they’re for example picking out a movie to watch, Fukase might wanna watch a horror movie and Len will be like “Pft of course no problem I’m not a wimp” but then later in the middle of the movie they’ll have to pause and chill together for a bit because Fukase’s like “dude you look like you’re gonna cry maybe let’s not, want some hot coco?”

-Fukase and Len once started talking about some English tv show and after it came up in conversation Len confessed that he had a hard time following without Japanese subtitles, especially when he wants to sing along to the songs. This lead Fuka to say he could help him if there was anything he needed clarified when watching it, which lead to them watching the show together. Now they’ve developed a habit of watching stuff together so Fukase can help translate and clarify, even though Len doesn’t need it much anymore

-While Len loves doing concerts and performances, he gets very homesick and missed his friends since he’s so social. He’ll text people non stop, though he’s sometimes worried that it gets a little annoying- but Fukase doesn’t mind at all. Len always somehow gives him the ability to watch them live from his home and tells him about how it is and that he misses him, and since Fukase doesn’t have a sleep schedule it usually works wherever Len is. Len also hooked him up with some real nice glowsticks that he furiously waved around when watching

-Since Fukase and especially Len are both pretty dang successful and feel like can’t really comfortably talk about their insecurities or negative feelings regarding their loid status in front of less successful loids, like Piko or Lui, they kinda just talk about it to each other. They bond over it- knowing Piko has it worse, Fuka isn’t as bothered much by his licensing, but is ashamed that his VP doesn’t care for him. And Len, tho almost always feeling like he’s the best he could be, sometimes feels inferior to Rin when remembering that he’s just kind of an add on to her

-Len has little to no insecurities regarding his looks, though he spent like his eye color very much, partially bc he’s often made to wear brighter green or blue contacts for promo stuff. Fukase thinks this is bullshit and Len’s eyes are pretty as hell

-Fukase is disabled, hence the cane, and doesn’t typically mind it too much because it lets him skip out on a lot of stuff in PE and other such things. His one complaint is that he can’t really carry Len bc of his balance, but Len insists it’s ok

-While being a bit of a twig and not a fan of exercise, but he does have a bit of upper body mass because he plays drums and has used crutches/wheelchairs at several points in life. Len’s the more athletic of the two tho and likes to brag about

-Len has dog energy and Fukase has cat energy

-Len bought Fukase a pair of those headphones with cat ears on them. Fukase said it was stupid, asked why he spent money on them and claimed he’d never wear them, but he often uses them at home

-They’ve faked a proposal for free food

-Len kinda doesn’t really know what exactly Fukase is or how he works but also doesn’t really care

-Fukase loves showing Len games that are actually horror games but don’t seem like it at first. Len always gets suspicion and Fukase always goes “nonono this ones’s fine it’s not scary at all I promise” and Len always falls for it

-After Len complained about it enough he finally manages to get Fukase to eat three meals a day (or at least try to). Fukase forgets to every now and again but Len’s usually there to remind him

-Despite the fact that nothing seems to make Len insecure ever, there was one time his perfect skin had a pimple and he refused to come out of his room for almost anything. Fukase had to sit outside his room and convince him it really wasn’t that bad on three separate occasions

-One time when Len and Rin were hanging out with Miku and some popular friends after a concert Fukase borrowed Flower’s motorbike to pick Len up so he’d seem cool. Was very effective on Len but the others were like “lmao you two are dorks” and “Wait is Fukase even allowed to drive that”

-Their friends were genuinely very surprised to find out that they liked each other because they both had this very tsundere-esque, mean, teasing and pulling no punches way of interacting so everyone figured they really disliked each other (both of them were surprised to find that the other liked them back too)

-When Fukase and Moke, who were the last members to join the friend group, first met Len, Fukase really disliked him while Moke adored him. This was in big part because Fukase knew Len’s celebrity image as an arrogant, self obsessed, annoying asshole, and Moke, being very into otaku culture, was a big fan who idolizes him and found his celebrity image to be talented and charming. However, when they actually got to know him, the script completely flipped and Fukase now finds him dumb, but charming, while Moke just finds him unbearable

[xxwithlovefromfaexx]

YOU and HIM

I’m out here bringing my shooters for mc, fuck adam

I actually wrote this before looking back at the YOU and HIM fandom before I posted this and WHOO this one is like...the even worse end for that angst ask that was sent into the vn page imo. This is not a peace offering to adam sjkdbfebfk

Also I’m sorry if Adam seems sort of ooc??? I wrote this purely from a YOU perspective, so if it’s not quite in canon its more bc its how YOU percieve him (at least in this fic, and for the purposes of this one)

WARNINGS: violence, physical abuse (mainly threat of, but you are holding him down here), sadism, guilt, kinda reads like a revenge plot villian arc ngl??? DEAD DOVE: DO NOT EAT!!

Finally, you held the power. After humiliating yourself to him, servicing the man that held your mind captive for so long.

After giving your sanity to the man that took you from your normal life, stole away your freedom, tore a hole through your regular life just to carve himself into it, you could finally be free.

You could taste it on your lips. It felt liberating, and part of you wished to leave him at merely that. Just to walk out of his life in an instant, as fast as he’d gripped onto you and pulled you into his storm.

But you knew you wouldn't be fully satisfied with that. How could you?

That freedom felt more than liberating, to you. It was intoxicating. And for the amount of pain that he had rattled into your numb bones, this was a feast to your starving eyes. The look of disbelief and shock in his eyes sent you spiraling. You were far from finished. Far, far from satisfied. You wanted more of him.

You wanted his fear to ripple through your body and swarm your insides, coating you in a liquid pleasure. His tears would be a lovely touch, you thought to yourself as you licked your lips at the thought.

You wanted to see him break, just as he'd broken you. You wanted to bridle him and train him just to break him all over again, for daring to think he'd figured you out. Just like he did to you.

“I could forgive you, sure. But, I don’t know if I want to give you that side of me, y’know?” You could hear the smile creeping into your words as you dangled the words so carelessly in front of his calculating eyes. 

Nothing could stop the grin forming on your face now, splitting into the sides of your cheeks. You could tell why he so loved, adored, putting your through this pain.

This feeling...above him now, holding the power he would hold so closely to your throat. The otherwise silent and quick way out- one that he had teased and prodded at you for weeks, months, however long this cat and mouse game had gone on for. 

You had felt so helpless, scrambling for an exit, useless to whatever he had planned for you around the corner. And within it all, you had truly felt yourself give up. You had all but left your body in those moments. It was the only way you could've survived it, in hindsight.

Somehow, your body persisted. It had held strong for that one precious moment, where he finally let his guard down, enough for you to take control. 

For you to allow your mind to once again be present. 

To piece yourself together after every time he broke you. 

Enough for the glint in his eyes to glean with hints of a weakness, that weakness that he would silently admit to you within your most intimate hell. 

That one precious moment that you finally, finally grasped in the palm of your hand. A moment of control.

This feeling, it was...exhilarating. Overwhelming. Consuming. Your body was humming with energy, and you needed to expel it from you somehow.

“You...please...” the soft wobble in his tone was something you shouldn’t have picked up on, had you not been so close to him to hear it. And you wished you didn’t.

You should have been prepared for him to unearth some part of empathy you held for him in you. 

The look of shock had waivered into a look of...regret? As if he should’ve never plunged that knife into you long ago. You should have cackled at that. The two of you were truly past that by now.

It really wasn’t like you to be this...hateful. Resentful. You always tried to understand, regardless of the pain somebody put you through. Because even thought it would never take the pain away, it would make it a far easier burden to bear. Right?

That’s what you had told yourself. Time and time again. From traumatic experience to the painful memories of your past...maybe this was your breaking point.

If he was regretful, if he held shame on the pain and fear he’d caused to you ever since that fateful day...so be it. You wanted to cherish at least some part of that for yourself.

After all, it was him who made you this way. He'd thrust you into this. He thrust you into...this decision...into the actions you’d made, into the person you had become but could barely recognize. He did that to you.

Didn’t he?

No, you realized.

He wasn't capable of that. 

This was a person that you'd let him push you into. 

It was necessary, you'd admitted to yourself. There was no way your weakened mind could handle all of this before his incessant meddling. The high that you were on now was only something you'd achieved through letting yourself break to his will.

So you laughed. You let loose, embracing the shrill, howling laughter that echoed through you, that shook your body to your core. You could feel the vibrations it sent through his body. 

You pushed yourself deeper into his skin, deep enough to bruise. You pushed yourself down onto his elbows, and he let out a grunt in pain. You tutted at the sound, as let your voice drop to nothing but a sweet whisper in his ear.

“Maybe things could have been a whole lot different. If you never thought to put at knife into me, for one,” The growl that followed through with your words made him flinch at the sound. You smiled.

“If you’d never thought to hunt me down to the ends of my sanity. Maybe I’d even try to understand you. To love you,” Your eye twitched as you leaned down close to his, so close you could feel his shallow breath on your skin.

“I suppose I can forgive you. After all, you've given me nothing but time already. Don't worry, darling. I've been through your hell. Now, I think it's time I showed you mine,” You let out a dry chuckle, and sat back for a moment with a deep inhale.

That feeling of power was overtaking your senses, and your legs pushed him into a vice like grip. You couldn't get too cocky now; it would be embarrassing if he knocked you off of him when you were only just getting started here. You knew too well that even this was a vulnerable state to be in.  

You could get lost in it-just like he had, not even moments before.

Back when the tables were turned, when it was you fighting for your life and everything that you held dear seemed to be escaping your grasp like falling sand in your fingertips.

This time you weren't helpless to Adam’s unforeseen desires. Now it was you who held everything. And you didn't want to lose that. You wouldn't fall for the same tricks you played on him.

So where should you hurt him first?

[shotorozu]

sleepy fem! reader who usually doesn’t initiate physical affection and isnt rly big on it (like no pda except for hand holding) bc she’s rly introverted/reserved? x kaminari, kirishima, shinsou! she suddenly sits on their lap while gaming and she kinda fiddles with their hair/ear lobe (they’re soft okay 😭)/their shirt and then dozes off on them and the boys reaction?

sleepy s/o suddenly sitting on their lap

characters : kaminari denki, kirishima eijirou, shinsou hitoshi

legend : [Y/N = your name] f!reader, quirk’s not mentioned

fic type : headcanons [fluff]

notes : i didn’t proofread in this one (i’ll do it later though,) but i’m a fat simp for this concept :,) ESPECIALLY FOR THE CHARACTERS I HC AS GAMERS rip.

»»————-　♡　————-«

kaminari denki

i headcanon denki as a big gamer, because he accidentally went one day without leaving his room because he was gaming—

IT’S A HEADCANON

but because i’m not exactly a ‘gamer’ i can only imagine denki playing shooter games and roblox??

please don’t clock me

anyways, he highkey wanted you to sit on his lap— like he’s always ask you to do so

but you’re not very big on pda besides hand holding, quick hugs and kisses so :((

he could only dream of that day to arrive, denki will wait for you to be comfy

lucky for him! that dream would soon become a reality

it’s a saturday afternoon right? and you’re taking a cute lil nap, curled up on the bed

while he’ll lowkey harasses 12 year olds on roblox

your eyes peer open from your lap, and while you usually had restrain over yourself from doing certain things

you’re half asleep, and you’re not really aware of the things you’re doing right now

so, you stumble over to denki’s gaming chair— and he’s like “hey baby, you’re awake!”

you don’t reply, and you just crawl onto his lap

denki’s probably going to freeze for a second when he feels your thighs pressing against his lap

but on the inside, denki’s like “omg the day has come! Y/N is finally on my lap NANDKWD”

okay, but when you started playing with the cord of his headset though-

he’s trying pretty hard to not short circuit, and he doesn’t want to electricute the both of you-

but he’ll immediately lose in whatever game he was playing, and he’ll just focus his entire attention on you— doting over you

“what’s all of this for, Y/N?” he asks— not that he’s complaining though,,

you just press yourself even more into his body, drifting back to sleep— and kaminari has you in his arms for the remainder of the afternoon

kirishima eijirou

another gamer, but he’s probably not as hardcore as denki or hitoshi ngl

but look,, kiri playing animal crossing with you omg (not saying he doesn’t play other genres of video games though,,)

anywayyy

regarding pda— he’ll be a little down that you won’t hug him everyday and stuff,

but he’ll quickly adapt to that (just for you) but he’ll still wait for the moment you’ve become comfortable with pda

but he just wants to hold you, even if it’s just your hand :))

it’s 8pm on a friday, and kirishima was playing his games with sero and kaminari

and you’re sleeping already because you were up late yesterday because you were studying for an upcoming test

it’s 8pm on a friday though?

moving past that, he doesn’t hear the blankets shift, nor does he hear you getting up from bed

but because of his peripheral vision, he sees your sleepy state walking towards you

he mutes his mic for a second, and he’s happy to see you up

“hey babe! what’re you doing up? are you hungry— wait,”

he’s a little surprised when he sees you move under his arms to sit on his lap, considering how you’re naturally reserved

you’re wrapping your hands over his shoulders, the chair creaking over the sudden addition of weight

he unmutes himself, telling kaminari and sero that he’s still alive, while leaning against your shoulder.

he was going to continue his game (almost as if he wasn’t flustered or anything)

but you started playing with his hair and omg, his cheeks are rivalling his hair at this point

hold it in kirishima eijirou, just hold it in for just a few more minutes

suddenly, he couldn’t take it anymore— and he just told sero and kaminari that he had to go, leaving the game and turning off his pc

leaving the both of them confused as hell

he won’t leave his gaming chair, just because he doesn’t want to wake you up

instead— he just stays there for a bit, not long before he drifts to sleep :)

shinsou hitoshi

a bigger gamer, he plays/played basically every single genre out there

from horror, to rpgs— you name it :)

repeat after me, shinsou hitoshi is an insomniac. he’s a bigger insomniac than me

he won’t mind that you’re a little reserved regarding pda, since he himself isn’t so big on it

but he’ll definitely wait for you to be more comfortable

anyways, regarding the insomniac part— he’s probably up late (3-4am kinda beat)

just playing video games

you’re long gone at this point, because hello?? it’s 3-4am??

you shift in your bed, and you can feel the empty space besides you— and you just

get up, and navigate through the dark— trying to find hitoshi

while you’re half asleep

he’s very immensed in his game, but he’ll probably detect the padding of your feet against the floor

he’ll watch you swing your arms around him, pressing yourself on his lap

he was surprised for a bit because,, he assumed you were asleep, but the bigger part of him is like

Y/N is on your lap, your fantasy has came to life.

he’ll call out to you, just to check how awake you are— but you only respond with playing with his ear lobe

omg that’s cute

unlike the other two, he still continues his game— but it’s not like he’s neglecting your sleepy existence

he’s pressing his face against your shoulder, while his hand’s brushing up your back from here and there

he finishes after an hour (rip his eyeballs) and he swiftly carries you both to bed

pressing a soft kiss against your temple, he admires your sleeping form

“i love you.. sleep well, Y/N”

he won’t sleep, but he’ll definitely lay in bed cuddling you while just.. admiring your existence.

i’ll die for this man

»»————-　♡　————-«

likes and reblogs are appreciated, thanks for reading!

i do not own bnha/mha and it’s characters. boku no hero academia/my hero academia belongs to horikoshi kohei, i only own the writing.

do not plagiarize my work :))

[cellsshapedlikestars]

day 3: pandemic

for the @fyeahjonandsansa 31 days of Jonsa event, day 3: pandemic

(I won’t lie, I only have 4 of these prompts written and I felt bad about it so I decided to write something for today real quick before I go edit the next chapter of fairytale ending)

.

Sansa Stark is not a gamer.

She never has been. She's seen people play: her siblings, even Harry had played those shooter games that she hated watching because they made her feel nauseous and disoriented. Too many loud sounds and flashing lights and jerky movements.

But here's the thing - she's been locked in her apartment for almost three months, alone, and Harry left his Switch when he fucked off to Essos with his secretary right before the pandemic hit. Now he's stuck there and she's here, in their apartment, with his Switch.

(She definitely thinks she got the better deal because despite being heartbroken and a little embarrassed at her unceremonious dumping, at least she's at home and not stuck in a foreign country fighting to get back, with a woman that, it turns out, he doesn't get along with at all now that they're forced into quarantine together.)

Sansa's lucky she can work from home, and she's lucky a lot of her hobbies are home-based: she likes reading and baking and knitting. There's only so much reading and knitting she can do, though - there's only so much TV she can watch and there's only so many batches of muffins and cookies that she can make before she finds herself overwhelmed by baked goods and boredom.

And so one day, she'd picked up that Switch after Arya told her about this game called Animal Crossing and it had sounded cute. She'd charged Harry's account linked to his device (he can think of it as her severance pay for their relationship) and downloaded the game.

Cut to a month later and she plays it nonstop. Her museum is quickly building up, though it's not complete yet (curse those seasonal bugs and fish!). Her island is gorgeous. Her residents are overwhelmingly happy. But it's not perfect.

“You should talk to Jon,” Arya says, her voice sounding distracted through Sansa's bluetooth headphones. Sansa thinks Arya's making lunch or something - it's about noon, and Sansa should eat, except she can't make herself move from the couch and her game. “He's got some real nice stuff on his island.”

“What's his ID?” Sansa asks as her little character runs around the island cleaning up stray bits of weeds that have sprung up overnight.

“I don't know, you think I have that memorized or something? Ask him. I gotta go eat.”

With that, Arya hangs up and Sansa huffs out a breath in annoyance. She puts down the Switch and picks up her phone and her thumb hovers over Jon's name in her contacts list. It isn't until she's pressed call that she wonders why she didn't just text him, but it's too late now. Texts can be ignored, she reasons. Calls are easier sometimes and she really wants to get her hands on whatever Jon might have on his island that she doesn't have. She has collections to complete.

She picks her game back up as it rings and finally he picks up.

“Sansa? Is everything ok?”

“Everything's fine,” she says, half paying attention as she sneaks up on a grasshopper sitting on a tree stump. “I need you to come over.”

There's a pause, she catches her grasshopper, and then he finally says, “you know there's a lockdown in place, right?”

“Duh,” she rolls her eyes, something she only does around a select few people and it turns out Jon is one of them. “But I need you, Jon.”

Another pause, she hears him take a deep breath, and then, “for what?” on a shaky exhale.

His voice sounds so strange that it finally makes her pay attention to the call instead of the game and she realizes her mistake. “Oh,” she sighs, “I mean in Animal Crossing. Arya says you have good stuff. You should come visit me and then I can visit you.” She's honestly not sure she has anything worthwhile to offer, but she figures she shouldn't just invite herself over to his island to take things. It's only polite that she invite him to hers, first.

“Animal Cr-” he starts and then it sounds like he takes the phone away from his ear and she can vaguely hear him mutter something from a distance (it sounds a bit like fucking hell, but she's not totally sure). There's a beat and a deep sigh before he speaks again, this time with the phone back up so she can hear properly. “Yeah, sure. I'll come visit your island.”

“Good,” she says, feeling quite pleased with the outcome of this call, though she's not sure why Jon sounds so mopey about it. He gets to come to her island! She can show him her flower garden!

What more could he possibly want?

[purple-stuck]

I really adore your writing! Can I PLEASE request a purple Sollux drabble? Maybe interacting with gamzee?

hey, gz. wanna hang out?

Gamzee stared down at his phone, squinting his eyes at the purple text. Somewhere in his addled think pan he thought it was strange. Sollux hardly hung out with anyone in person. He was always a shut in, especially for Purple blood standards. Only clown who'd attended less church was probably Gamzee himself and that was only because Sollux sometimes made video calls. But, ever sense Aradia... it was a miracle he still answered texts.

Still, Gamzee wasn't gonna say no to his blood brother's company. Maybe Feferi helped him cope. Maybe he went pale for Karkat, those two had always been close. Hardly mattered.

WeLl, ShIt. SuRe MoThErFuCkEr. CaN't SaY nO tO a NiCe AnD pRoPeR hAnGiNg SeSsIoN. wAnT mE tO sWiNg By YoUr PlAcE, oR wHaT?

nah. ii'm at the door. ii wa2 iin the area and fiigured ii'd a2k.

Right on cue, there was indeed a knock at Gamzee's front door. Huh. Sollux must've been right at the door when he texted. Made sense. If Karkat was any indication, Sollux had a habit of just barging into a brother's hive like he lived there and playing all their video games. Probably remembered at the last second that he and Gamzee weren't that close.

When Gamzee open the front door, he found himself staring at Captor's chest. Even hunched over as he was, Sollux was still the tallest troll Gamzee knew. The boy managed to be both lankier and buffer than Gamzee somehow. Granted, that's not hard. It'd be a stretch to call any version of Sollux Captor buff, but any purple blood with a proper lusus was going to be thicker than Gamzee.

Gamzee stopped that thought dead before it sunk in any deeper.

"At least I know I'm not interrupting anything." Sollux said dryly. "That's not the hair of someone who had plans for the evening."

Gamzee snorted, appreciating that the ribbing was good natured. Sollux didn't regard him with the same contempt, say, Equius did, so it was hard to take anything he said as an actual insult. Same deal with Karkat, really. "So, what brings you around to my hive? Feferi finally convince you to go outside?"

Sollux's lips twitched into a smirk before he jutted his thumb behind him. "Nah. I'm just picking up an old hobby."

Gamzee's eyes trailed to the cart Sollux had parked at the bottom of the steps, a chill going down his spine at the sight of faintly blue blood trailing down it's side. "Oh..."

Gamzee's eyes twitched back to Sollux, who just sighed. "I'm on my second kill, so don't worry. I don't kill in odd numbers. Plus, I've seen you making diamond eyes at Karkat and I'm not that much of a dick."

Gamzee let go off a breath he hadn't known he'd been holding. "Well, it's good to know I won't be adding to Aradia's fucking corpse collection-"

Sollux stiffened and Gamzee stopped dead. Shit. Fuck. He should know better. What was he doing bring up Aradia, fuck-

"It's... fine." Sollux sighed, bringing his hand to his temple as he steadied himself. "I'm fine. It's fine. She would've found it funny, anyways." Sollux forced a smile onto his face. "Besides, you're not wrong. She'd love to throw corpse parties for these motherfuckers in whatever rung of the Dark Carnival she wound up in."

Gamzee laughed politely and stepped aside to let Sollux in before the conversation got any more uncomfortable. Sollux plopped onto the couch, quickly propping his legs up on the table. "You got any video games? I somehow doubt you're much of a shooter fan."

Gamzee grunted, sliding him a faygo as he took his seat. "Nah. Tav got me into fiduspawn. You ever play that?"

Sollux snorted. "Funny story about that, actually. EQ got me into it. I was talking shit about it around him and he protested that NP was into it."

"Did he? Shit, man, good for him. He always kinda... rolls over around me. Motherfucker's always trying to please me."

"Well, yeah. It's NP we're talking about here. You'd complain is I started talking shit about Tavros."

Gamzee blinked. That was... oddly pointed coming from Sollux. Sure, every word sounded like a sarcastic insult when you put it in his mouth, but it sounded like he was trying to make a point. That suddenly serious stare wasn't helping, and it made Gamzee cough uncomfortably.

"Uh, yeah, I would." His eyes flickered towards the door. Towards the cart. "...Why?"

"You got any feelings for him?"

Now this was starting to get wildly out of character. Sollux was the last person to stick his nose into anyone's love life, unless it was to annoy Eridan somehow. Hell, people just being sappy around him annoyed him, which made this even more bizarre.

"Yeah, well, Tav, said he wasn't interested."

"He's not?"

"Look, bro, I appreciate it, but we don't need an auspistice. You can't mediate what ain't there."

"But you do feel something for him. You care about him, pitch, red, I don't care how." Sollux was almost looming over him now, even without standing up. Gamzee was beginning to wonder whether he should go for his clubs when Sollux sighed.

"Right, right. That.... probably doesn't make any sense to you. I'm sorry." He stood up, face not just sour like usual, but outright grim. "Let me show you what I'm talking about."

Sollux made his way to the door wheeled his cart inside, a chill went down Gamzee's spine.

"...Bro. Did you?"

"No. Gog no. Fucking Messiahs above, hell no! I cull trolls but I'm not a sick fuck who parades their corpses around in front of their friends."

Sollux looked down at the cart, at the body hidden beneath the crumpled sheet. He seemed far, far away for a moment, like his soul had been taken by the Messiahs themselves and his body was an empty shell they left behind.

"You... know Aradia's dead, right?"

Gamzee relaxed, more confused and sad now than afraid. "Yeah."

Sollux looked at him. "Do you know how she died?"

Sollux didn't need an answer and he didn't wait for one. The purple voids of his eyes showed behind his matching glasses. "It started... when Vriska abducted me."

"I was out doing my regular, bi-wipely rounds. Looking for two bodies for Aradia to preserve in a 'corpse party'. Or, more accurately, looking to make two bodies for her to preserve."

"I'd spotted a couple of burgundies, so I went to make my move. I'd barely seen Vriska's face by the time the bag was over my head and by then the needles were in my neck. My guess is she'd paid some FLARPers to help her. I know damn well she couldn't handle me alone."

"When I woke up, I was in Vriska's hive. She looked so... fucking smug when she had me all chained up. She explained what Aradia did to her. Talked about how she'd sent some ghosts her way... and she wanted to get even."

"So Vriska was going to have me kill Aradia."

"That's when the torture began. It was pretty amateurish, but that's all it needed to be. She just needed to distract me, make a crack for her to slip into... one opening was all she needed to grab my mind."

Sollux was staring down at nothing by the time he finished, bending the metal handles of his cart with his grip.

"I still remember the walk to Aradia's hive." He said, choking back something. "I could hear her scream in my mind before she even saw me."

Gamzee's hand landed on his shoulder, snapping Sollux back to reality. Sollux pushed the smaller clown back before clearing his throat. "So, the next time I left my hive, I decided to pay Serket a visit."

Sollux threw the tarp off to reveal Vriska's mangled body. Or, what was of it.

Gamzee took at a step back. The amount of patchwork Sollux had to do to get Vriska's upper torso back in one piece would be impressive if it didn't imply how grizzly the scene must've been before he started. Tellingly, Sollux didn't even try to put Vriska's legs back together. He just dumped the soupified slop into a box and put it on the bottom shelf of his cart.

"Jegus..."

"Yeah, I got carried away."

Gamzee backed up and fell onto the couch, mostly just to get away from the smell. Sollux pulled his two swords out of Vriska's head, wiping them clean in one quick stroke.

"So... why are you telling me this?" Gamzee asked.

Sollux seemed to think for a moment, staring at his reflection in the blades. "To try to understand." He waved his blades vaguely over Vriska's... "body" for lack of a better word. "Most of this was unnecessary. She died quickly but... it wasn't satisfying."

Sollux looked at Gamzee meaningfully. "I figured you could tell me why."

Gamzee's eyes widened. "Shit, man, you mean because..."

"Of Tavros. Yeah. Vriska killed him. The army won't take someone who can't walk and he has no where else to go. That's assuming someone like, well, me, doesn't just pick him up off the streets. He's living on borrowed time on a planet like this, and that's all her fault."

Sollux looked at Gamzee meaningfully. "So... is this satisfying to you?"

Gamzee sunk into the couch, staring up at the ceiling. "Fuck, man. You can't do this to a motherfucker. This is a lot to drop on me all at once." He looked at the corpse, trying not to curl his nose at the sight. "...I mean... no. Fuck, I'd hesitate to say anyone even deserves that, but mostly it just makes me feel... kinda sick."

Sollux slumped down. "I don't get it. This should be satisfying. We should be glad that she's dead, but we're not."

Again, Gamzee was there, suddenly resting a hand on Sollux's shoulder. "...Look, man. I'm sorry I'm not any help with this. Karbro is so much better at this shit than me, but..."

"...I guess it's not really her death that we're looking for. We're looking for a way to make it so all the problems she caused never happened. And... that's not gonna happen. I've accepted that Tav's not gonna get his legs back... and I think he's accepted that too. And, Aradia, wherever she might be now up in that Dark Carnival, knows that she's not coming back either. So... shit, maybe we should just... keep moving?"

Sollux stared at him blankly, before that default grouchy snarl crept back onto his face. "That's a really shitty way to end that spiel, you know that?"

Gamzee shrugged, that some color had bled back into Sollux's face. "Well, shit. I'm no Karkat and you know it."

"Yeah, you're not. I'd still be huddled up inside without that grouchy asshole."

Sollux sighed. Not tiredly, but like a weight had been lifted somewhat. With all that off his chest, Sollux tilted his head up. He nonchalantly lined up his swords and slid them down his throat, swallowing up his blades until only the hilts remained to dangled beneath his uvula. Gamzee squinted at him curiously.

"....What?"

"Shit, man, I have no idea how you manage to talk like that."

Sollux smirked, grabbing his faygo off the table and chugging it in two swigs. At this point, he was just showing off. "Very, very carefully. I'll teach you sometime."

Sollux threw the tarp back onto his cart and began peddling it out the door. "I'd better get going, the sun will rise soon." Gamzee waved him off as he opened the door, pausing just before he closed. "Oh, by the way. You owe me a game night. This one derailed."

Gamzee just nodded as Captor slammed the door, knowing that was Sollux-ese for "let's hang out sometime".

[forasecondtherewedwon]

3 Simple Rules for Dating a Centenarian

Fandom: The Falcon and the Winter Soldier Pairing: Sam Wilson/Bucky Barnes Rating: T Word Count: 2374

Summary: After seeing Steve's shield handed over to some stranger, Sam calls up Bucky, certain he's the one person who can properly commiserate. He doesn't really expect Bucky to answer though (the guy's become a bit of a recluse), or to hear the hints that he might be missing Sam as much as Sam's been missing him. Not that he'd ever say it straight out.

Sam is almost completely still as the feelings rattle through him like a roller coaster’s last run on a derelict track. He only lets it out—the blend of frustration, betrayal, and regret—in the way his fingers squeeze his knee through his jeans, skin damp against the denim. Keeping his hands clasped, and watching those clasped hands, was more grounding, but he needs one of his hands to hold the phone to his ear, and that activity is getting pretty damn tired.

Bucky’s voicemail clicks on for the third time in a row.

“Bucky,” Sam says, “I know you prefer calls to texting, so what are you doing ignoring me, man? Haven’t used your cell in so long that you’ve forgotten how to hit the answer button? At least it rang. That’s something, I guess.”

He sighs away from the speaker where it won’t be recorded for Bucky to hear later. Maybe he did divert his message from the snarky sarcasm he was planning to leave the guy, but Bucky doesn’t need to hear him sigh on top of that.

For a few moments, Sam taps his foot along with the muffled music of his nephews’ video game coming through the closed door. He knows the boys’ routine (and if he ever forgets, he sees the copy Sarah has on the fridge door) and that this isn’t their usual scheduled time for whatever they’re playing out there. Best guess: Sarah wants them hogging the TV so she won’t be tempted to peek at that government-sanctioned shitshow. Sam can’t blame her. Actually, he wonders if she blames him. The disappointment was so clear in her eyes before he stopped making himself meet them. He thought he was doing the right thing when he handed the shield over. Are there people out there who think he’s let them down, or just his sister? Just himself?

He can’t talk to Sarah right now and he’s thankful that she’s giving him some time to himself, but as soon as he got it, he realized he didn’t know what to do with it. Just like that shield. Dialing Bucky over and over—tapping in every number every time because that appears to be part of this pity ritual he’s performing—seemed like the thing he should do. Probably won’t answer. That asshole is terrible at staying in touch. Still, Sam’s heart feels a little heavier with every word closer he gets to the end of this message. Feels like he’s trying to keep the thing afloat in his chest, like his parents’ boat down at the dock. This is what he knows he should do when everything in him wants to sink—reach out, talk to people. Kinda self-sabotage when he picks the one person almost guaranteed not to answer.

Oh, he’ll hear back from Bucky eventually, probably a handful of choppy texts sent in the middle of the night two weeks from now. Sam knows his pattern; Bucky’s chattiest between 3am and 4am, so chatty that what are likely intended as longer blocks of text arrive in broken fragments because he wants to make everything into neat paragraphs, like he’s writing a damn letter, instead of just getting to the point, but he hits send too soon. Sam would teach him—with plenty of mocking and name-calling, but he would teach him—only while he’s been running ops all over the planet, Bucky’s shrunk his own world way down. He’s gone local to the extreme and it aggravates Sam, even though Bucky isn’t his responsibility, isn’t his other inheritance from Steve. It’s sorta just easier to feel like Bucky is a misplaced bequest than to acknowledge that maybe he misses the guy and his sharp-shooter’s eye and his caveman hair. He can’t keep calling him.

“Thought I’d give you a heads-up,” Sam says, voice weary with this half-true excuse. “Maybe you already saw.” He clears his throat and says quickly, “Anyway, guess I’ll hear from you when I hear from you.”

He’s pulling the phone away from his head and has barely ended the call when it’s ringing in his hand. He answers and catches Bucky’s voice saying his name before it’s even back up to his ear.

“Bucky?” Sam says. “You have a senior’s moment and forget where you left your phone?”

“Nah,” Bucky says. “I saw it was you and decided to ignore it.”

“But you called back.”

“You wouldn’t quit calling. Seemed like you needed me to tell you directly to knock it off.”

“Jackass.” Sam’s gaze darts to the door, but it’s still shut. No chance Sarah saw him grinning over this easy banter. Always the banter with this idiot. Always easy. He sniffs and turns his chair away from the black TV screen. “Did you see that joker on the news?”

Bucky’s either less self-conscious or more inept because he sighs right into the mouthpiece, an exhausted breath in Sam’s ear that has his fingers fleetingly digging into his knee.

“Couldn’t believe that shit,” Bucky tells him in a rough voice. He’s clearly holding back his own feelings about today’s events and, from the sounds of it, they’re more along the lines of anger, hurt, and a simmering desire to wrench the shield from the arm of the new Captain America. “You know that thing’s supposed to be yours.”

“You saying I should’ve done something to stop it?” Sam demands.

“Coulda.”

Sam forces his shoulders to drop, draws a slow breath in and pushes it back out.

“It wasn’t mine anymore, if it ever was. I gave it to the Smithsonian. They sealed it in this glass case and added it to the exhibit.”

“Not a very tight seal.”

“Guess not,” Sam agrees.

“You shouldn’t have turned it over,” Bucky says. Sam’s silent, frowning, and Bucky goes on. “Forget about the shield being given to somebody else—it shouldn’t have even been in a glass case. Doesn’t belong there.”

“I do just fine without it,” Sam assures him. The practicalities of carrying that shield around are more straightforward to discuss than his yawning uncertainty in the face of Steve’s legacy and his place relative to it. “The shield would only get in the way of the wings.”

“You and those wings.”

“Hey, they carried me over Tunisia recently. Show some respect.”

“Didn’t hear about that,” Bucky says in a tone that’s difficult to interpret, though Sam squints thoughtfully as he listens.

“Yeah, well, I shouldn’t even be telling the likes of you, but it was discrete. As far as the major players are concerned, I was never there.”

“So it was illegal?”

Sam’s head tips back as he laughs hard.

“Why, you wanna turn me in?” he jokes. “Working on the government’s trust? What’s the next level up from a pardon? Knighthood?”

“You are such a pain in the ass,” Bucky groans, which really does make Sam smile.

“I’m sure it would’ve been illegal if you were there,” he says automatically. Too fast, his imagination fills it in, a fictional alternative materializing in his mind. Him and Bucky, cocky in reckless freefall. Him and Bucky, fighting back-to-back in a plummeting aircraft. Sam screening Bucky from enemy fire with his wings. Bucky deflecting a stray bullet with his arm before it could hit Sam.

“Nah, I can’t do that no more.”

“Uh huh. I’m sure you’re an angel.”

“Anybody get hurt?” Bucky asks.

Sam glances through the window at the blue sky, the truck rolling unhurriedly past with the driver’s arm hanging out to catch the sun. Beautiful day. He remembers a kick that sent a guy through the door of the plane, sucked out into the sky, another guy tossed aside who tried to fight him in midair, and a helicopter aflame as it went down. He shrugs and figures Bucky’ll hear the gesture in his voice.

“Nobody who didn’t know the risks.”

“Of going up against Captain America?” Bucky probes. Sam rolls his eyes.

“You know, that would almost be a compliment if you got my name right.”

“Don’t tell me you’re not using the name just to avoid compliments from me.”

“I honestly can’t say which one would feel more wrong,” Sam says, passing a hand over his head as he leans back in his chair, “calling myself Captain America or hearing a little overdue praise from you.”

“I’m not really a words guy. Ask my therapist.”

Sam sits with that for a second. He’s happy that Bucky’s talking to someone. He needs it, badly, after decades of violence and being belted into the passenger seat of his own brain. It’s more than Bucky’s ever admitted to him before, but Sam would bet—and bet big—that seeing some stranger named as Steve’s successor today has gotten to Bucky as much as it’s gotten to him. Something like that is bound to open Bucky up a little. He’s the only other person Sam can imagine the news having such a monumental impact on.

“You could try words,” he goads, not wanting to leave Bucky hanging more than a few seconds after his admission. “What else do you have if you don’t feel like being a human action figure?”

“I have my system. My rules.”

“Oh yeah? What rules?”

“Three of ’em,” Bucky informs him. “Nothing illegal. Nobody gets hurt. Making amends for the actions of the Winter Solider.”

“You don’t have to make amends for something you—”

“Don’t. It… helps.”

And who is Sam to question what’s helping Bucky? After the multiple-lifetimes’ worth of hell the guy’s been through?

“Good for you, man,” Sam offers softly.

“Save it, Sam.” The words are clipped but light. Sam grins.

“No words for me either? You more comfortable with me sticking to actions? How are we supposed to talk to each other when you don’t come to Tunisia with me?”

“Wasn’t invited,” Bucky quips back.

“You mighta been if you answered your phone more often. I’m not gonna send you the details to a covert operation in a text.”

“You wanted me in Tunisia?”

“You get shit done,” Sam acknowledges simply. You wanted me in Tunisia? echoes in his head. His heart’s bobbing like a buoy now. You wanted me in Tunisia? You wanted me?

“Not like that.”

“‘Not illegal,’” Sam repeats. “‘Nobody gets hurt. Making amends.’”

“Right. Can’t do any of that.”

“Well, I’m glad this regime’s working for you, but you have to admit it’s weird that I saw more of you when we were fighting alien hordes.”

“What can I say?” Bucky asks in a tone that seems to consciously flatten the charm out of it. “I’m old-fashioned now.”

Sam snorts.

“You were old-fashioned then.”

“I assume you had a team on the ground.”

“I had to,” Sam says over the sound of a squabble in the other room. Immediately, he can hear Sarah’s voice rising slightly above, breaking it up. Just like that, there’s the looping music of the video game again. She’s raised those boys well. “Couldn’t wait around for you.”

“I might show up if you asked me on better dates.”

“It wasn’t a date, it was a goddamn op.”

It’s startling to hear the sound of laughter. Not hearty, deep, rich, or loud, but definitely laughter. Bucky laughs? Sam backtracks a minute. Bucky makes jokes? About dating? About the two of them dating? Evidently, that is something he’s capable of, along with returning calls during daylight hours.

Sam shifts in his seat.

“You could come around sometime,” he suggests, nervously rubbing a hand up and down his thigh. “If you like fish and you’re ever in Louisiana.”

“I do like fish,” Bucky says. “I’ve been going to this sushi place a lot lately.”

It’s not his taste that surprises Sam—it’s the readiness with which he responds to the invitation. He would’ve sooner guessed that Bucky would tell him to shove it up his ass. In a joking way, but still.

“On dates?” Sam asks, telling himself he’s providing some good-natured hassling and that it has nothing to do with the odd feeling he got when Bucky’s joke about them dating caught up with him.

“One. Mostly, I go with Mr. Nakajima.”

“And that’s not a date?”

Sam laughs and wishes he could shut his own mouth as firmly as he’s (many times) told Bucky to shut his.

“I’m pretty sure he’s in his eighties, so he’s more age-appropriate for me than most people, but I murdered his son,” Bucky says grimly.

“Amends?” Sam guesses, adjusting his tone to cope with Bucky’s emotional switchback.

“I haven’t told him yet, but, yeah, I’m working on that.”

They’re both working on something, Sam thinks. Both confronting something that feels too big to tackle—the decision not to announce himself as the new Captain America, guilt for assassinations Bucky had no control over but which span the better part of a century. Sometimes it seems to Sam that they go up against the easiest situations as a team and face the hardest stuff alone. But he called Bucky, and Bucky called back.

“You could bring some of those amends down here and trade them for a snapper dinner,” Sam proposes, aiming for irritatingly cheerful to pull Bucky back out of the dark.

“What do I have to make amends to you for?”

“Being a dick. I’ll text you my sister’s address.”

Sam swiftly ends the call. There are two possible sources to which he can attribute the small surge of adrenaline he feels: hanging up on Bucky and the fact that he might’ve just asked him on a date. When Sam dialed, he knew it was because he didn’t want to do this alone, but he thought that meant watching the appointment of an upstart Captain America. Although he believed he could count on Bucky’s understanding today and for the near future, asking him down to have dinner with Sarah and the boys (or tricking him into it, since he didn’t exactly say it’d be a thing with the whole family) lengthens the timeline. Near future? Inviting Bucky to meet his family and see where he grew up means recognizing that he’ll be in his life a little longer. Alone? Sam might forget the meaning of the word.

[angelicamerlinbarnes]

Songs that make me think of the Marauders (PART TWO)

(part one)

Everything Happens For A Reason (Madison Beer)

Remus, after the Prank, completely heartbroken and completely confused… when did Sirius stop loving him in that sweet, gentle way he’d always promised to?

When did Sirius start seeing him as the monster he's always sworn Remus isn't?

I used to believe That everything happens for a reason But I just can't find a reason You'd wanna hurt me so bad

Can't get no relief Time moves on with the seasons But I still can't find a reason You'd wanna hurt me so bad

And what in the world did I do to deserve such a pain in my heart? Guess it's true I'm never getting over you

I still love you I still want you I still love you

If You Love Her (Forest Blakk)

This is the song Sirius and Remus play during their first dance. Fight me.

She always has trouble falling asleep And she likes to cuddle while under the sheets She loves pop songs and dancing, and bad trash TV There's still a few other things She loves love notes and babies and likes giving gifts Has a hard time accepting a good compliment She loves her whole family and all of her friends So if you're the one she lets in

Kiss her with passion as much as you can Run your hands through her hair whenever she's sad And when she doesn't notice how pretty she is Tell her over and over, so she never forgets

Take it If she gives you her heart, don't you break it Let your arms be a place she feels safe in She's the best thing that you'll ever have On days when it feels like the whole world might cave in Stand side by side and you'll make it She'll love you if you love her like that

cowboy like me (Taylor Swift)

Sirius and Remus go on the run together after James’ death. Not at first - they meet up in a bar about three months after. But after that three months they’re inseparable again - desperately in love, playing Robin Hood, driving a blue Mustang into the sunset - they’re miserable, sure, but they’re also very good at pretending they’re not.

And you asked me to dance But I said, "dancing is a dangerous game" Oh, I thought, this is gonna be one of those things I've got some tricks up my sleeve Takes one to know one You're a cowboy like me Never wanted love, just a fancy car Now I'm waiting by the phone

Perched in the dark Telling all the rich folks anything they wanna hear Like it could be love I could be the way forward, only if they pay for it You're a bandit like me, eyes full of stars Hustling for the good life Never thought I'd meet you here It could be love We could be the way forward, and I know I'll pay for it

And the skeletons in both our closets plotted hard to mess this up And the old men that I've swindled really did believe I was the one And the ladies lunching have their stories about when you passed through town But that was all before I locked it down Now you hang from my lips like the Gardens of Babylon With your boots beneath my bed Forever is the sweetest con

And I'm never gonna love again I'm never gonna love again

no body, no crime (Taylor Swift)

Sirius Black’s soulmate, James Potter, is dead. And Sirius knows who did it.

He just can’t prove it.

(I rewrote it for y'all. You're welcome.)

Cell Block Tango (from "Chicago")

The Dark Marauders. James, Sirius, Remus, Peter, Lily, Severus, and Regulus - performing uselessly sensual dance routines in Azkaban because why the fuck not? Their Dark Lord is dead, and all they have left of him is their loyalty and a bout of snakes and skulls on their arms.

(Wrote this one too. Again, you're welcome.)

Broken Bones (KALEO)

Remus Lupin is a werewolf, and every full moon, this song runs through his mind as James and Sirius envelop his naked body in their arms and tell him he’s beautiful, and so so good, and they’ll love him forever and ever and ever, they promise. And for a single, measley second every time, Remus believes them.

Hoping things might go my way Some might say I talk loud, see if I care Unlike them, don't walk away from my fear I've busted bones, broken stones, looked the devil in the eye I hope he's going to break these chains

Another hard day, no water, no rest I saw my chance, so I got him at last I took his six shooter, put two in his chest He'll never say a word no more The devil got him good for sure

Ain't got no place to call a home Only chains and broken bones Ain't got no place to call a home So come on lord, won't you take me now? So come on lord, what you waiting for?

Oh, the devil's going to make me a free man The devil's going to set me free The devil's going to make me a free man The devil's going to set me free...

traitor (Olivia Rodrigo)

Sirius is innocent. Remus believes that. Remus knows that. He knows it. Because he doesn’t know how he’ll live if he’s wrong. Well, okay, he knows -

He won’t.

Brown guilty eyes and little white lies Yeah, I played dumb but I always knew That you'd talk to her, maybe did even worse I kept quiet so I could keep you

And ain't it funny how you ran And ain't it funny how you said you were friends? Now it sure as hell don't look like it

Ain't it funny all the twisted games All the questions you used to avoid?

Ain't it funny? Remember I brought her up, and you told me I was paranoid

You betrayed me And I know that you'll never feel sorry for the way I hurt Loved you at your worst, but that didn't matter

God, I wish that you had thought this through Before I went and fell in love with you When she's sleeping in the bed we made Don't you dare forget about the way you betrayed me

Never Not (Lauv)

The Marauders, slowly breaking apart over the years. James and Lily settle in London, and Sirius and Remus run off to travel the world. They split off somewhere in Asia and forget to call. Peter cleans dishes in Hogwarts’ kitchens and Severus spends his time in those dungeons, teaching potions and writing letters he never sends. Regulus holes up in Grimmauld Place, never marrying, never moving. James and Lily divorce when Harry is ten, and go their separate ways. They always move forward, but -

They also always look back.

I lost myself, seventeen Then you came, found me There's a room in my heart with the memories we made Took them down but they're still in their frames There's no way I could ever forget

For as long as I live, and as long as I love I will never not think about you From the moment I loved I knew you were the one And no matter whatever I do I will never not think about you

What we had only comes once in a lifetime For the rest of mine, I'll always compare To the room in my heart with the memories we made Nights on fifth, in between B and A

Didn't we have fun? Didn't we have fun, looking back?

We were so beautiful We were so tragic No other magic could ever compare...

Scared To Live (The Weeknd)

Sirius and Remus after twelve years apart, having no idea what to do with each other. They were in love once - are in love? - but those days are long gone. Sirius sees how Remus looks at Tonks, but knows Remus can’t ever really love her, much as he likes her, because his heart has forgotten every word but Sirius' name. And Sirius is happier than he thought he’d ever get to be without James, really, though he’s far from happy or even content - is this all there is? Is this how they die? Is this their ending?

No. No. No, after everything, this can’t be it - this cannot be it.

(But if he dies, well... he hopes Remus lives on without him. Happier.

I guess.)

When I saw the signs, I should've let you go But I kept you beside me And if I held you back, at least I held you close Should have known you were lonely

I know things will never be the same Time we lost will never be replaced I'm the reason you forgot to love So don't be scared to live again Be scared to live again No, don't be scared to live again

You always miss the chance to fall for someone else Cause your heart only knows me They try to win your love, but there was nothing left They just made you feel lonely

I am not the man I used to be Did some things I couldn't let you see Refused to be the one who taints your heart

I hope you know that I've been praying that you find yourself We fell apart, right from the start I should have made you my only

So don't be scared to live again I said, "don't be scared to live again"

I Know Where I've Been (from "Hairspray! Live")

Remus and Sirius, sad and happy together, alone in Grimmauld Place and dancing deep into the night as this song plays on the record player and they sway. Their whole lives have been war, but in these moments, there is peace.

Fleeting, hopeless peace, but peace nonetheless.

There's a light in the darkness Though the night is black There's a light burning bright Showing me the way But I know where I've been

There's a cry in the distance It's a voice that comes from deep within There's a cry asking why I pray the answer's up ahead Cause I know where I've been

There's a road we've been travelling Lost so many on the way But the riches will be plenty Worth the price we had to pay

There's a dream in the future There's a struggle we have yet to win And there's pride in my heart Cause I know where I'm going And I know where I've been

Brooklyn Baby (Lana Del Rey)

Sirius Black being himself, and James Potter and Remus Lupin being in love with him.

They say I'm too young to love you I don't know what I need They think I don't understand The freedom land of the seventies

I think I'm too cool to know ya You say I'm like the ice, I freeze I'm churning out novels like Beat poetry on Amphetamines

Well, my boyfriend's in a band He plays guitar while I sing Lou Reed I've got feathers in my hair I get down to beat poetry And my jazz collection's rare I can play most anything I'm a Brooklyn baby

They say I'm too young to love you They say I'm too dumb to see They judge me like a picture book By the colors, like they forgot to read I think we're like fire and water I think we're like the wind and sea You're burning up, I'm cooling down You're up, I'm down You're blind, I see

But I'm free I'm free

I'm talking about my generation Talking about that newer nation And if you don't like it, you can beat it Beat it, baby You never liked the way I said it If you don't get it, then forget it Cause I don't have to fucking explain

Yeah, my boyfriend's pretty cool But he's not as cool as me Cause I'm a Brooklyn baby I'm a Brooklyn baby

I Can't Go On Without You (KALEO)

Sirius and Remus are lost to each other, for twelve years and then two more, Sirius locked behind bars and then a Veil and Remus on the run alone and then with a woman he’s somehow fooled himself into thinking he loves.

They’ll be together again. One day. But for now, there’s nothing to do but wait.

Alone.

Well, they thought they were made for each other Only thinking of one another Never thinking just for one second She would take a different attraction

We don't want that We don't want that, oh no I can't go on without you

Oh, so what's the point of breaking my sweet heart? She wanted me to let down my guard Well, you know what they say It's better that way So, you better hush and walk away

Well, was I supposed to wait for you sweetheart? And hide away the shame, yes I keep it all inside Though the thought had crossed my mind! To do all the things I'll regret, we don't want that

I can't, I can't, I can't go on without you I can't go on without you, oh, lord I can't go on without you, babe

Oh, she loves me She loves me not She loves me My love don't love me...

Oh, so what is left but a broken man? Cause nothing hurts like a woman can I can't go on without you...

happier (Olivia Rodrigo)

Sirius as he watches Remus fall in love with Tonks right in front of him, unable to love Sirius the same way after everything. Sirius loves his cousin - he does. He just kind of hates her, too.

There’s been a lot of things in this life he’s been afraid of, but Remus leaving him never even crossed his mind.

That was his mistake, I guess…

Fuck.

You've moved on, found someone new One more girl who brings out the better in you And I thought my heart was attached For all the sunlight of our past But she's so sweet, she's so pretty Does she mean you forgot about me?

And do you tell her she's the most beautiful girl you've ever seen? An eternal love bullshit you know you'll never mean Remember when I believed you meant it when you said it first to me? And now I'm picking her apart Like cutting her down make you miss my wretched heart But she's beautiful, she looks kind, she probably gives you butterflies

Say you love her, baby, just not like you loved me And think of me fondly when your hands are on her

I hope you're happy, just not like how you were with me I'm selfish, I know, I can't let you go So find someone great, don't find no one better I hope you're happy, but don't be happier.

That's The Kind Of Woman (Julia Michaels)

James left Sirius for Lily, and that was okay. Sirius loved Lily, and he loved James, so it was okay. At least he still had Remus.

Well, he did. Until Tonks came along.

It’s okay. Really. Sirius has gone his whole life feeling unloved.

He can die that way too.

OR

James, Sirius, and Remus fell in love in fourth year, and it was wonderful. And then Sirius started to notice things - small things, little things. Like the gentle way James and Remus are with each other, the way they wake each other up with kisses in the morning and dance the night before the full moon, the way their hands fit together the way everyone expected Sirius’ to fit with them, but better.

The way they love each other more than him.

And that’s okay. That’s fine. He wants them to be happy, and they make each other happy. So he lets them go the last day of seventh year, and disappears into the wind never to be seen again, just like their love for him.

Childhood picket fence, smells like confidence Raised with a little more common sense Isn't always on defense Sits up straight and knows how to take a compliment Jealous but the right amount Isn't scared of missing out, missing out's scared of missing her Doesn't buy things to fill voids Doesn't hate the sound of her own voice

Doesn't cry when someone leaves Isn't contradictory Mind takes a break when she falls asleep Always takes her own advice Crosses T's and cuts her ties Figured out sympathize from empathize Doesn't keep those letters in a drawer Doesn't keep a closet full of things she bought and never wore Gives all her attention to the people that are with her She still loves to dance She still loves her sister

If the me I am Walked out that door Would I miss her?

Maybe, a little bit, sure Oh, I love myself, but I'd love her more Yeah, that's the kind of woman I'd leave me for

Quarter Past Midnight (Bastille)

The Marauders steal a Muggle’s pick-up truck and fly down the highway, literally. The lights are bright and the music is loud, and they’re screaming with laughter, dancing and kissing under the stars. It’s that one perfect moment, the one poets write about seeking their whole lives. This is that moment, this is their moment.

They’ll never be this happy again.

It's a quarter past midnight as we cut through the city The streets are getting restless Good times, bad decisions And the sirens are mending some hearts But we're the losers on our back seats Singing love will tear us apart

It's a quarter past midnight, still avoiding tomorrow It's a quarter past midnight, but we're just getting going We keep on running through a red light Like we're trying to burn the night away This is my favorite part Help me piece it all together, darling Before it falls apart

And the speakers are blowing We want the bodies on the billboards Not the lives underneath them And now we're crawling up the walls again And it's a quarter past twelve And you said we'd leave this place in dust And fall from heaven straight through hell We never know what we have We never knew what we had

We keep on running Why are we always chasing after something Like we're trying to throw our lives away?

And the secrets are flowing Our lips are getting looser I don't know what I'm saying We never knew what we had I never know what I've had

Home (Edith Whiskers)

The Marauders remember each other in a haze - well. The ones that are still alive do, that is.

Regulus, falling.

James, fighting.

Lily, screaming.

Sirius, smiling.

Peter, choking.

Remus, crying.

Severus, bleeding.

They all went, and not one peacefully.

If I close my eyes, I can still see them. Laughing.

I do love my ma and pa Not the way that I do love you Well, holy moly, me oh my, you're the apple of my eye Girl, I've never loved one like you Man, oh, man, you're my best friend, I scream it to the nothingness There ain't nothing that I need Well, hot and heavy pumpkin pie, chocolate candy, Jesus Christ Ain't nothing please me more than you

I'll follow you into the park, through the jungle, through the dark Moats and boats and waterfalls, alleyways and pay phone calls I've been everywhere with you We laugh until we think we'll die, barefoot on a summer night Nothing new is sweeter than with you And in the streets, we run afree, like it's only you and me Geez, you're something to see

Oh, home, let me come home Home is whenever I'm with you Oh, home, let me come home Home is wherever I'm with you

I Hate That You're Happy (Tiny Little Houses)

Severus is alone, alone again. Lily’s gone. She’s run off to marry James Potter, the prat, and Severus - Severus doesn’t hope for much in this life, but he holds out hope for her. Because everyone knows she loves James now, but she loved Severus once too… and she still keeps his green ribbon tied around her ring finger, almost like they’re still married in mind.

So Severus keeps his vows to her. He promised her forever - it’s okay, honestly. That forever can be spent apart. He’ll love her anyway.

He'll love her always.

I'm sorry if I ever hurt you And I never kissed you enough And I just have trouble unravelling sometimes The feelings that I kept locked up

And I know it's my own misfortune And I didn't hold tight enough But I found it hard to keep myself whole While drowning in my bitter blood

I'll stay awake again and start feeling The spot where you used to reside And I'll lay beneath these cold empty sheets Huddled and clutching my sides

And I know it's my own misfortune And darling, believe me, I do And you've got your problems, and hell I've got mine But I find it hard that we're through

And I hate when you're with him And I hate when you smile And I hate that for once you don't seem like you've cried And I hate that you've kissed him And I hate that I'm sore But most of all I hate that you're happier than before

And I hate when you're with him And at night you're entwined And I hate that I have to pretend that I'm fine And I hate that I miss you but you miss him more But most of all I hate that you're happier than before Most of all I hate that you're happier than before

Call Your Girlfriend (Clara Mae)

James knows Lily isn’t happy with him. It’s been months, she’s had plenty of time to come around, but she just - she doesn’t love him. She never has. He should’ve seen that, but he was too busy hating the greasy-haired git to realize that Lily has always loved him more than anything else.

Gently, he lets her go. He presses the green ribbon he found in her drawer around her hand, and he kisses her goodbye, and he tells her to go after her happiness, whoever that is. And she smiles at him, the tears in her eyes happy, and she runs away, crashing into Severus’ arms. And they look… they look so perfect together. Like they make so much sense.

It’s okay. James can take it.

Regulus is staring at him. James winks at him, and smiles.

Call your girlfriend It's time you had the talk Give your reasons Say it's not her fault Tell her not to get upset Second guessing everything you've said and done

And when she get upset Tell her that you never meant to hurt no one You just tell her that the only way her heart will mend Is when she learns to love again And it won't make sense right now But you're still her friend

Cloud 9 (Beach Bunny)

James, Sirius, and Remus. It’s an unconventional love story, but not one they feel the need to explain.

They can and will dance together forever, butterbeers in their hands and magic in their eyes, hearts colliding in a messy, three-way kiss.

I don't wanna seem the way I do But I'm confident when I'm with you Lately all I feel is bad and bruised Tired of tripping on my shoes

When I start to tumble from the sky You remind me how to fly Lately, I've been feeling unalive But you bring me back to life

But when he loves me, I feel like I'm floating When he calls me pretty, I feel like somebody Even when we fade eventually to nothing You will always be my favorite form of loving

the last great american dynasty (Taylor Swift)

The Most Ancient and Noble House of Black, and its last heir, Sirius Potter Lupin.

Fuck those assholes. He’ll be as mad as he likes.

Was the heir to the name, and money And the town said "how did a middle class divorcée do it?" The wedding was charming, if a little gauche There's only so far new money goes They picked out a home and called it Holiday House Their parties were tasteful, if a little loud The doctor had told him to settle down It must have been her fault his heart gave out

And they said, "there goes the last great american dynasty" Who knows, if she never showed up what could've been There goes the maddest woman this town has ever seen She had a marvelous time ruining everything

Rebekah gave up on the Rhode Island set forever Flew in all the Bitch Pack friends from the city Filled the pool with champagne and swam with the big names And blew through the money on the boys and the ballet And losing on card game bets with Dalí

There goes the most shameless woman this town has ever seen She had a marvelous time ruining everything

They say she was seen on occasion Pacing the rocks staring out at the midnight sea And in a feud with her neighbor She stole his dog and dyed it key lime green Fifty years is a long time Holiday House sat quietly on that beach Free of women with madness Their men and bad habits, and then it was bought by me

Who knows, if I never showed up what could've been There goes the loudest woman this town has ever seen I had a marvelous time ruining everything

I Don't Believe You (P!nk)

Regulus, alone after Sirius runs away. All alone in a giant house, all alone with his wretched mother and her Death Eater friends, all alone without the only person he’s ever loved.

Sirius never comes back, but Regulus waits at the door for him every day anyway.

(Sirius writes Regulus a million letters. He wonders why he never answers. Not even with a cursive fuck you. Maybe he should go back… maybe - no.

No, best not.

It’s not like Regulus misses him.)

I don't mind it, I don't mind at all It's like you're the swing set and I'm the kid that falls It's like the way we fight, the times I've cried We come too close, and every night The passion's there, so it's gotta be right Right?

I don't mind it, I still don't mind at all It's like one of those bad dreams when you can't wake up It looks like you've given up, you've had enough But I want more, no, I won't stop Because I just know you'll come around Right?

Just don't stand there and watch me fall Cause I still don't mind at all

No I don't believe you When you say, "don't come around here no more" I won't remind you You said we wouldn't be apart No I don't believe you When you say you don't need me anymore So don't pretend to not love me at all

Cause I don't believe you.

Little Miss Perfect (Annapantsu cover)

Regulus Black, the perfect child.

He and his brother are nothing alike. Sirius is rebellious, Regulus is obedient. Sirius is brash, Regulus is controlled. Sirius is bravery, Regulus is misery. They have nothing in common.

Well -

Except their hearts, bothing beating for a boy named James Potter with twinkling eyes. A boy only one of them will get to kiss.

Regulus is happy to be the one who’s lost out. At least, that’s what he tells himself as he stares up at the white light, the surface too far above to reach.

Straight hair, straight A's, straightforward Straight path, I don't cut corners I make a point to be on time Head of the student council I don't black out at parties I jam to Paul McCartney If you ask me how I'm doing I'll say...

Well, hmm Often I ask myself, "what did I do?" To get as far as I've gotten A pretty girl walks by my locker My heart gives a flutter But I don't dare utter a word Cause that would be absurd behavior For little miss perfect

No, I can't risk falling off my throne Love is something I don't even know Straight hair, straight A's, straightforward Straight girl Little miss perfect That's me You don't even know Rewind, induce amnesia Deny the truth, that's easier You're just confused, believe her When she says there's nothing there It's never worth it When you're little miss perfect

Achilles Come Down (Gang Of Youths)

Sirius, running from his family and his predetermined madness, his wildness carrying him so far he makes a circle.

Remus, hiding from love and freedom, his happiness stitched from his skin in ugly, painful scars.

James, watching his best friends tear each other apart, too blind with love to see the monsters they’ve made of each other.

Children, come down.

Achilles, Achilles, Achilles come down Won't you get up off, get up off the roof? You're scaring us and all of us, some of us love you Achilles, it's not much but there's proof You crazy assed cosmonaut, remember your virtue Redemption lies plainly in truth Just humour us, Achilles Achilles, come down Won't you get up off, get up off the roof?

The self is not so weightless, nor whole and unbroken Remember the pact of our youth? Where you go, I'm going So jump and I'm jumping Since there is no me without you Soldier on, Achilles Achilles, come down Won't you get up off, get up off the roof?

Hurt and grieve, but don't suffer alone Engage with the pain as a motive Today of all days, see How the most dangerous thing is to love How you will heal and you'll rise above

Achilles, jump now You are absent of cause or excuse So self-indulgent and self-referential No audience could ever want you You crave the applause, yet hate the attention Then miss it, your act is a ruse It is empty, Achilles, so end it all now It's a pointless resistance for you

Achilles, just put down the bottle Don't listen to what you've consumed It's chaos, confusion, and wholly unworthy Of feeding and it's wholly untrue You may feel no purpose nor a point for existing It's all just conjecture and gloom And there may not be meaning, so find one and seize it Do not waste your self on this roof

Feel your breath course frankly below And see life as a worthy opponent Crowned by an overture bold and beyond Ah, it's more courageous to overcome You want the acclaim, it's not worth it, Achilles More poignant than fame or the taste of another

Don't listen, Achilles, but be real and just jump You dense motherfucker (you're worth more, Achilles) You will not be more than a rat in the gutter (so much more than a rat)

You want my opinion (no one asked your opinion) My opinion you've got You asked for my counsel (no one asked for your thoughts)

I gave you my thoughts Be done with this now, and jump off the roof Can you hear me Achilles? I'm talking to you

Throw yourself into the unknown with pace and a fury defiant Clothe yourself in beauty untold and see life as a means to a triumph

Achilles, come down.

This Is Why We Can't Have Nice Things (Taylor Swift)

Remus gets super drunk after the Prank and gives a fucking performance on top of the coffee table in front of the entirety of Gryffindor. Sirius is bright red. James is on the verge of tears. Severus is gaping. And Remus is seething.

You woke the wolf. Now watch it bite.

And there are no rules when you show up here Bass beat rattling the chandelier Feeling so Gatsby for that whole year So why'd you have to rain on my parade? I'm shaking my head, I'm locking the gates

It was so nice being friends again There I was giving you a second chance But you stabbed me in the back while shaking my hand And therein lies the issue, friends don't try to trick you And so I took an axe to a mended fence But I'm not the only friend you've lost lately If only you weren't so shady

Here's a toast to my real friends They don't care about the HE SAID, SHE SAID And here's to my baby He ain't reading what they call me lately And here's to my mama Had to listen to all this drama And here's to you... Cause forgiveness is a nice thing to do

Hahaha, I can't even say it with a straight face!

This is why we can't have nice things, darling Because you break them, I had to take them away This is why we can't have nice things, honey Did you think I wouldn't hear all the things you said about me? This is why we can't have nice things

right where you left me (Taylor Swift)

Remus is pretty sure he died on October 31, 1981. He’s not sure why his body’s still moving.

Friends break up, friends get married Strangers get born, strangers get buried Trends change, rumors fly through new skies But I'm right where you left me Matches burn after the other Pages turn and stick to each other Wages earned and lessons learned But I'm right where you left me

Help, I'm still at the restaurant Still sitting in a corner I haunt Cross-legged in the dim light They say, "what a sad sight" I swear you could hear a hair pin drop Right when I felt the moment stop Glass shattered on the white cloth Everybody moved on I stayed there Dust collecting on my pinned-up hair They expected me to find somewhere Some perspective, but I sat and stared

Did you ever hear about the girl who got frozen? Time went on for everybody else, she won't know it She's still 23 inside her fantasy How it was supposed to be Did you hear about the girl who lives in delusion? Break-ups happen every day, you don't have to lose it She's still 23 inside her fantasy And you're sitting in front of me

At the restaurant, when I was still the one you want Cross-legged in the dim light, everything was just right

I'm sure that you got a wife out there Kids and Christmas, but I'm unaware Cause I'm right where I cause no harm, mind my business If our love died young, I can't bear witness And it's been so long But if you ever think you got it wrong

I'm right where you left me You left me no choice but to stay here forever...

Every Day a Little Death (from “The Count of Monte Cristo”)

Remus Lupin, waiting.

Waiting, waiting, waiting…

For what, he’s not sure. Maybe death. Maybe madness.

Right now all he’s got is lonely.

Lonely, lonely, lonely; la, la, la…

Come out, come out, wherever you are, Peter. Come out and kill me, you coward.

Another day, another week Another month, another year Another day, another night Until it’s day again The sun has fled, I go to bed And scratch a line on the wall Another day, where nothing changes at all

And everyday shuffles by like the day before! On its way to the blackest of skies And everyday a little death comes and paces the floor! And a little bit more of me dies... Another day, another week Another month, another year Another night I spend alone Until it’s day again Our little star has moved away And all the world is a blur I only see I am not me Without her

Everyday a little death for everyday I die Everyday a little death and still I know not why...

He will come back! Perhaps but still… He will return to me! Another prayer You’ve got to live for today I will live when we’re together again Everyday I will pray until then

And everyday another prayer will bring him close to me And every night out little star we will share The one day when I open my eyes He will be standing right over there, one day

There’s something I must say I wanted to protect you

I wish there was a way I could make it untrue I heard the news today I fear the worst has happened An accident occurred He is dead! Dead and gone Rest in peace may flights of angels sing him to his rest Let me hold and help to heal you!

Everyday a little death...

tolerate it (Taylor Swift)

Remus Lupin. Abandoned, alone, aimless. Unwanted, unseen, unloved. Mad, morbid, monster.

He wonders if in the next life, he’ll be dealt some better cards.

Best not hope. Best not be greedy. He could be dead -

Isn’t sadness better?

I sit and watch you reading with your head low I wake and watch you breathing with your eyes closed I sit and watch you I notice everything you do or don't do You're so much older and wiser and I

I wait by the door like I'm just a kid Use my best colors for your portrait Lay the table with the fancy shit And watch you tolerate it

I greet you with a battle hero's welcome I take your indiscretions all in good fun I sit and listen I polish plates until they gleam and glisten You're so much older and wiser and I While you were out building other worlds, where was I? Where's that man who'd throw blankets over my barbed wire? I made you my temple, my mural, my sky Now I'm begging for footnotes in the story of your life Drawing hearts in the byline Always taking up too much space or time You assume I'm fine But what would you do if I

Break free and leave us in ruins Took this dagger in me and removed it Gain the weight of you then lose it Believe me, I could do it! If it's all in my head tell me now Tell me I've got it wrong somehow I know my love should be celebrated But you tolerate it

Téir Abhaile Riu (Celtic Woman)

Sirius being Sirius and Remus and James trying to reign him in. I don’t know. Just vibes, I guess - three soft little gays living out a domestic half-insane life on a little farm in Wales, not a mile from the ashen sea.

Stay here and never you mind The lights of the town are blinding you The sailors they come and they go But listen to what's reminding you Handsome men surrounding you Dancing a reel around you

Listen to the music flow I'm falling for the flow of home I'm home to dance till dawning

Stay awhile and we'll dance together now As the light is falling We'll reel away till the break of day And dance together till morning

No One Knows Us (BANNERS, Carly Paige)

James, Sirius, and Remus are queerplatonic partners. Well, James is theirs - Sirius and Remus are dating. In love. But they and James, they’re not. Not that it matters - every assumes, from their atypical affection, that they are.

James wishes he could be with them, sometimes. The way he wants. Like it’s normal. Without all the prying eyes.

He wonders if he stole a pirate ship and sailed them somewhere else, if it would be any different. Any easier.

Loving the right people shouldn’t be a burden.

Wish I could kiss you when I wanna Without all the fear and all the drama Kill to hold your hand in public I could try to fight the feeling Dull it down like sleeping without dreaming

I wanna push you up against the wall Want them all to hear me call you baby I know it's never gonna happen And I've learned to accept that I accept that

I need you closer Can we go somewhere? No one knows us Leave our world behind We can hole up in a motel room Where no one knows us

See You Again (Carrie Underwood)

The Marauders as they die, one by one. James too early, Sirius too soon, Remus too late. Reunited wherever wizards go when they die, after a long, hard road of what felt like a whole lot of goddamn nothing.

But here they are, at last: alone no longer.

Said goodbye, turned around And you were gone, gone, gone Faded into the setting sun, slipped away But I won't cry cause I know I'll never be lonely For you are the stars to me You are the light I follow

I can hear those echoes in the wind at night Calling me back in time, back to you In a place far away where the water meets the sky The thought of it makes me smile You are my tomorrow

Sometimes I feel my heart is breaking But I stay strong and I hold on cause I know...

I will see you again This is not where it ends I will carry you with me Til I see you again I will see you again...

Bloom (The Paper Kites)

James and Sirius and Remus, loving each other. And not knowing what queerplatonic partners are until Severus and Lily shove a Muggle book into their hands with sweet, manic grins.

“Oh,” James says, with wonder. Sirius kisses him. Remus takes his hand. James looks at them, his eyes wide and twinkling. “Oh, that’s us.”

In the morning when I wake And the sun is coming through Oh, you fill my lungs with sweetness, And you fill my head with you

Shall I write it in a letter? Shall I try to get it down? Oh, you fill my head with pieces Of a song I can't get out

Can I take it to a morning Where the fields are painted gold And the trees are filled with memories Of the feelings never told?

When the evening pulls the sun down, And the day is almost through, Oh, the whole world it is sleeping, But my world is you

Can I be close to you?

Me and My Husband (Mitski)

Sirius and James. Fight me.

(Oh, and Remus - hopelessly in love with them and chasing after their shenanigans as the world stretches out before them, endless.)

I steal a few breaths from the world for a minute And then I'll be nothing forever And all of my memories And all of the things I have seen will be gone With my eyes, with my body, with me

But me and my husband, we're doing better It's always been just him and me together So I bet all I have on that furrowed brow

And I'm the idiot with the painted face In the corner, taking up space But when he walks in, I am loved, I am loved And at least in this lifetime, we're sticking together Me and my husband, we're sticking together

You & Jennifer (bülow)

Regulus, angry and bitter, left alone in his big black bed wondering what’s so fucking amazing about Lily Evans that could make James want her more than him.

OR

Remus, so fucking in love with his two best friends… his two best friends, who are so fucking in love with each other, who look at each other like they’re the world, who fuck Remus when the world is ending. His two best friends… assholes.

Listen, no, we don't need to be enemies Ain't got a vision of us in the future with a white picket fence and eternal decisions Now I'm sitting here wondering, when did this all start?

Would rather be the girl that got away than be under your thumb Don't need to spend no more time on you, not like I was in love Not that I'm having a nervous breakdown, I'm just let down You don't know what that's like though to wait up all night So I thank you for teaching me how I could live without you Never needed me, I don't need you

Fuck you and Jennifer, I know that you're out with her Go pretend that you're just friends I'll pretend that I'm not hurt I know all the shit I heard, you can take these bitter words Fuck you and Jennifer Go fucking make love to her

Soon You’ll Get Better (Taylor Swift, The Chicks)

James, surrounded by people he can’t fix.

James, holding a screaming Sirius against his chest as he sobs and shakes from the fifth nightmare that week.

James, brushing salve across the scars of a terrified and bruised Remus after yet another full moon.

James, trying to lure a quiet and cold Peter back to them with candy as he recedes even further away into Slytherin robes.

James, fucking Lily; James, kissing Severus; James, touching Regulus -

James, doomed to love people he can’t help.

The buttons of my coat were tangled in my hair I didn't tell you I was scared That was the first time we were there Holy orange bottles, each night I pray to you Desperate people find faith, so now I pray too And I say to you

I know delusion when I see it in the mirror You like the nicer nurses, you make the best of a bad deal I just pretend it isn't real I'll paint the kitchen neon, I'll brighten up the sky I know I'll never get it, there's not a day that I won't try And I'll say to you

And I hate to make this all about me But who am I supposed to talk to? What am I supposed to do if there's no you? This won't go back to normal, if it ever was It's been years of hoping, and I keep saying it because cause I have to

Soon you'll get better Soon you'll get better You'll get better soon Cause you have to.

Dance Alone (Blanks)

James Potter being his usual idiotic adorable self. (It’s just the vibes, man.)

Been staring at the wall today, to find some hidden meaning My momma called to ask me how I'm feeling I've been running out of things to think So what's the point of dreaming? Called all my friends cause I cant get along with all my demons And I've been watching from a distance how the seasons change

Been staring at the wall today, still looking for some meaning I tried talking to myself for a change to ask me how I'm feeling I've been running out of room to think I need a higher ceiling

I've been lost, lost in the rhythm lately I don't know, know how to dance alone

Strawberry Blond (Mitski)

James falls in love with Sirius first - make no mistake, it was absolutely Sirius first. Because Sirius was just so bright, and so lovely, and so daring, and he made James laugh as they ran and drove and flew for miles without a direction. Anything for a touch.

And then there came Remus - beautiful, sweet, kind Remus, his eyes so gentle and his smiles so pure, and James wanted to hold him forever, wanted to take his hand and dive right into the sun, wanted to burst into flames. Anything for a taste.

And then Sirius and Remus fell in love with each other, and now James watches them from the outside, grinning behind tears and thinking, Oh god. I’m happy.

I love everybody because I love you When you stood up, walked away, barefoot And the grass where you lay left a bed in your shape I looked over it and I ached

I love everybody because I love you I don't need the city, and I don't need proof All I need, darling, is a life in your shape I picture it soft and I ache

Reach out the car window, trying to hold the wind You tell me you love her, I give you a grin Oh, all I ever wanted was a life in your shape So I follow the white lines, keep my eyes on the road as I ache

Look at you, strawberry blond Fields rolling on, I love it when you call my name Can you hear the bumblebees swarm? Watching your arm, I love it when you look my way

FML (Arizona Zervas)

James has a habit of falling for people so fierce he can never refuse them. Regulus is just the last one - the one he keeps, even if he dies still trying to figure out how.

(This is the James and Regulus theme song, I’m calling it.)

I might let you drive me crazy Usually I ain't the type to stay Cause you could fall in, and go psycho Ain't no telling where this might go But I take my chances either way

You look like somebody that could really hold it down You look like somebody that would always stick around I know you probably crazy All my friends said stay away but that shit just don't faze me Got a little bit of sass, I like that You don't take no shit, yeah you fight back Never let a dude hit it on the first night I can't even sleep over til I wife that All these bitches in my phone, hit the boy But I've been curving everyone for you Girl I would give you every single password All you gotta do is let me through

Imma keep it honest, I know that you got a plan I know you ain't perfect, but basic bitches never last I don't usually do this type of shit So baby trust me when I tell you that I'm all about it Yeah, I might fall in love and let you fuck my life up Just so I could go and write a song about it

Last man left you brokenhearted, let me treat you right If you need me I could pull up any night You just say the words, girl, I don't need a reason Give me something more than just a lover on the weekend

Come and fuck my life up.

Lay Me Down (Sam Smith)

If James married Regulus instead, but the war still tore them apart and to shreds.

They still fall, they still die, they still lose… but James is captivated by grey eyes rather than green ones, at least in this lifetime. At least for now.

Yes, I do, I believe that one day I will be where I was Right there, right next to you And it's hard, the days just seem so dark The moon, and the stars are nothing without you Your touch, your skin, where do I begin? No words can explain the way I'm missing you Deny this emptiness, this hole that I'm inside These tears, they tell their own story Told me not to cry when you were gone But the feeling's overwhelming, it's much too strong

Can I lay by your side, next to you? You And make sure you're alright I'll take care of you I don't want to be here if I can't be with you

Forever (... is a long time) (Halsey)

Remus didn’t know anyone could love him, the way he is. You can’t blame him for letting James and Sirius slip through his fingers when he didn’t know they would’ve stayed forever.

He wonders if happiness still sounds like his name on their lips.

I spent a long time watering a plant made out of plastic And I cursed the ground for growing green

I spent a long time substituting honest with sarcastic And I cursed my tongue for being mean

Weightless, breathless, destitute Motionless and absolute He cut me open, sucked the poison from an aging wound Now fifty thousand walking deads would cower at this small brunette It's a nice surprise knowing six feet high Would reach and grab the moon if I should ask

Or just imply that I want you to be more light So I could look inside his eyes And get the colors just right

But love built provinces, callouses, break promises Cause I could never hold a perfect thing and not demolish it What am I thinking? What does this mean? How could somebody ever love me?

"Tell him he's got bad news coming..."

Used To This (Camila Cabello)

James and Sirius, crazy kids in mad love in a big Muggle city, dancing and kissing under the lights every night… and then meeting Remus, and wondering if all these years they’ve been mistaking magic for something else, because this, love, this is what magic is.

No, I never liked San Francisco Never thought it was nothing special Til you kissed me there No, I never liked windy cities But I think maybe when you're with me I like everywhere

It's the strangest feeling Midnight, I'm not leaving No, for once, I think I'll stay I say your name, just listen Doesn't it sound different? Never whispered it this way

It's gonna take me a minute But I could get used to this The feeling of your fingertips The feeling of another kiss Like every tattoo on your skin I'm memorizing every inch

The callouses on your fingers I admired them from a distance Now they're on my cheek

Oh, I've known you forever Now I know you better Let's just get carried away And it bears repeating Now my heart's bleeding When you tell me that you'll stay

It's gonna take me a minute But I could get used to this I could get used to this...

Love Me Like You (Little Mix)

You cannot tell me James and Sirius did not stand on top of the Gryffindor table in the Great Hall and serenade Remus with this while he covered his bright red face with his hands and damn near cried with embarrassment and laughter, because they did. I promise you, they did.

I solemnly swear.

Darling, he can't buy my love It's you I'm dreaming of

so baby, baby Come and save me

Last night I lay in bed so blue Cause I realized the truth They can't love me like you I've tried to find somebody new Baby, they ain't got a clue Can't love me like you

Come Home With Me (from “Hadestown”)

Sirius and James tripping over themselves trying to say hi the first time they meet Remus, his nose buried in a book in a small cafe, at a table by the window in a dress covered in sunflowers, his cheeks pink and his smile blinding.

OR

James, tripping over himself to win Severus over, who just isn’t having it. (Fuck off, Potter.) (Please?) (No.)

You wanna talk to her?

Yes!

Go on. Don't come on too strong.

Come home with me.

Who are you?

The man who's gonna marry you

Is he always like this?

Yes

Your name is like a melody

A singer, is that what you are?

I also play the lyre...

Oh, a liar, AND a player too! I've met too many men like you.

Oh, no. I'm not like that.

He's not like any man you've met.

That's what I'm working on - A song to fix what's wrong. Take what's broken, make it whole; A song so beautiful, it brings the world back into tune, back into time. And all the flowers will bloom... When you become my wife.

Oh, he's crazy. Why would I become his wife?

Maybe because he'll make you feel alive.

Alive? That's worth a lot... What else ya got?

You Belong With Me (Taylor Swift)

Sirius and James, unable to figure out why they're so bothered by the amount of people who have suddenly started flirting with Remus after the summer of fifth year.

He's just... he's theirs. Their werewolf. Their scrawny motherfucker. Their Moony.

Just.

Theirs.

Oh.

She doesn't get your humor like I do She'll never know your story like I do

Walk in the streets with you in your worn-out jeans I can't help thinking this is how it ought to be And you've got a smile that can light up this whole town I haven't seen it in a while You say you're fine, I know you better than that

Standing by and waiting at your backdoor Oh, I remember you driving to my house in the middle of the night I'm the one who makes you laugh when you know you're about to cry And I know your favorite songs, and you tell me about your dreams Think I know where you belong, think I know it's with me...

Have you ever thought, just maybe, you belong with me? You belong with me.

Scrawny (Wallows)

I just really love Remus Lupin, okay?

Used to be level with all my friends Still wear the same shoes I did back then I don't think they've ever been untied I can't regret the things I don't try I'd switch it up but I don't like change Only content if things stay the same Don't care to watch the story unfold Hate feeling like I'm not in control I've been sleeping with the light on I tend to freak myself out Will you come a little closer?

I say the wrong shit at the right times If I'm offending them, I don't mind Maybe they all should listen to me It isn't all about what you see Question though, how do I look to you? Am I so thin that you can see through? I've been sleeping with the light off I wanted to remember Will you come a little closer now?

I'll be one of those people you remember They'll be looking at us when were together I'll be a mannequin you can dismember You don't like my clothes but you still like my smile Take me home to mom but it'll take awhile They might think they're cooler than me by a mile I can still have wisdom and look like a child

I'm a scrawny motherfucker with a cool hairstyle

Hate You (Seann Bowe)

Severus and Lily after the Incident. Still loving each other, but not knowing why or how. Having a million things to say, but never the words.

I'm sorry. What a tragic fucking joke.

Look at me now, such a pitiful place You found someone I thought that'd help erase These crazy thoughts that we were never broken You can't see red flags through rose colored glasses!

I killed you in my head now If I see you out with friends I'll just tell myself that it's a phantom or illusion Guess I haven't chosen which

I hate that I miss you, I hate that I'm lost I hate those dead flowers you taped to your wall I hate that you're okay and I can't move on I hate that somehow this is all my fault! I hate that I'm wide awake watching the door I hate these long showers sitting on the floor I hate in the end it was me who was wrong I hate that I don't really hate you at all

But I kind of wish I did...

I don't really hate you at all.

Bitter And The Sweetness (The Ready Set)

James and Sirius and Remus, dancing in the rain. Sirius is screaming up at the sky, and James is pulling Remus against him, quelling his shivering in an instant.

“I love you,” he whispers, and Remus beams, throwing his arms around his neck and kissing him as Sirius screams, “ELECTRIFY ME MOTHERFUCKER!” at the clouds.

That’s love, bitch.

Troublemaker look on your face Followed by a smile and I melt away It ain't always been this lovely We turn the ice and start a fire, melt away

It don't happen overnight It's laughing after fights Knowing which song I should sing to make you smile again Your favorite flowers How I know before you say, "It's gonna be okay"

Love, I think we got time to make mistakes Bitter and the sweetness, I just love the taste

You give me trouble in the best way When you let your hair down I can't look away You've just always been that lovely We turn the dark into light You'll be staying close

Like the time we got stuck out in the rain When you took my hand said, "Baby, we should stay."

Serenade (BANNERS)

James Potter's ghost, watching over Sirius Black forevermore. You don't just leave your soulmate behind. Never.

Stolen, some people stay a life, some for a moment Some hearts they set a light just to be frozen And so we're out of time, broken But now you've got the chance to travel oceans I hope the world's as wide as you were hoping Don't let heartache cloud your mind

If the days go darker, darling And you lose your way Go on, go on, I'm not beside you But I'll be the song there in the silence Let go, let go, darling, it's over now You're on your own, but I'm on your shoulder I'll always be your serenade, serenade, I I'll always be your serenade

They told you It's not the being drunk, it's being sober That's when it really hits you that it's over It's hard to say goodbye So you can keep me Somewhere out of reach but if you need me Just hum these memories and you can feel me I'm always standing by Go and write your story, darling You will find your place

You can always remember that I'm here to ease your mind I'm on your side and You can call me and just like that I'll sing a song to bring you home, babe

It's Quiet Uptown (from "Hamilton")

Remus, alone. His husband gone, his friends dead, his family murdered. Nothing left for him, until...

"Padfoot."

A sheepish smile.

"Hi, Moony."

Remus takes a deep breath. Sirius reaches for his hand.

They'll figure it out.

There are moments that the words don't reach There is suffering too terrible to name You hold your child as tight as you can And push away the unimaginable The moments when you're in so deep It feels easier to just swim down And so they move uptown And learn to live with the unimaginable

I spend hours in the garden, I walk alone to the store And it's quiet uptown, I never liked the quiet before And I pray, that never used to happen before

If you see him in the street Walking by himself, talking to himself, have pity You would like it uptown, it's quiet uptown He is working through the unimaginable His hair has gone grey He passes every day They say he walks the length of the city You knock me out, I fall apart Can you imagine?

Look at where we are Look at where we started I know I don't deserve you But hear me out That would be enough If I could spare his life If I could trade his life for mine He'd be standing here right now And you would smile and that would be enough

I don't pretend to know The challenges we're facing I know there's no replacing what we've lost And you need time But I'm not afraid I know who I married Just let me stay here by your side That would be enough

There are moments that the words don't reach There's a grace too powerful to name We push away what we can never understand We push away the unimaginable They are standing in the garden Standing there side by side She takes his hand It's quiet uptown

Forgiveness, can you imagine? Forgiveness, can you imagine? If you see him in the street Walking by her side, talking by her side, have pity They are going through the unimaginable

Dynasty (MIIA)

The Marauders are dead and gone, did you know?

But they were great once. Unstoppable. Invincible, young, in love.

Can you tell? Can you...

Remember?

Some days, it's hard to see if I was a fool or you a thief Made it through the maze to find my one in a million And now you're just a page torn from the story I'm living The scar I can't reverse And the more it heals, the worse it hurts Gave you every piece of me, no wonder it's missing Don't know how to be so close to someone so distant

And all I gave you is gone Tumbled like it was stone It all fell down, it all fell down

Thought we built a dynasty that heaven couldn't shake Thought we built a dynasty like nothing ever made Thought we built a dynasty forever couldn't break up.

Dancing After Death (Matt Maeson)

Oh. It's you. You're here.

I never thought I'd see you again.

Do I know better than this? You're a word that I can't forget Though the thought rattles my brain Will you fold or will you remain?

If I don't get better than this man in my skin If I let go, would you hold on? Would we fly? Is it safer if we just say that we tried? Are we laughing at the danger?

As the sun waits to eclipse And the taste teases my lips I'm too tired to wrestle with it Will we burn, or will we repent?

Are we dancing after death, you and I?

[trashystarker]

what could never be - a starkercest one shot

Title: What Could Never Be Fandom: MCU Pairing: Starkercest (Brothers AU) Rating: Mature (Angst and Feels - Feels and Smut - NSFW)  Word Count: ~6100 Prompt: “I’m not drunk enough yet.” 

Summary: Peter wants to talk to Tony about an issue he’s having, and winds up hearing a confession from his brother that he never expected to hear. 

A/N: Here’s my next bingo fill for @starkercestevent​! Please enjoy! :) 

***

“Hey, Tony?” Peter saw his brother sitting in the rec room, playing the new shooter on the television. “Can I talk to you about something?” 

“Hang on.” Staying back, he heard Tony speaking to his friends through the headset he was wearing, and then he saw him shut off the game. “What’s up, Pete?” 

That was the question, wasn’t it? What was up. Too much, not enough. Peter’s thoughts were a mess, and he didn’t know what he was supposed to do about it. Tony was his big brother - someone he knew he could come to with any problem that he had, no matter what the subject matter. But he was trying to figure out the best way to discuss his current problem, as there was no real handbook on how to deal with unrequited feelings for someone he knew he shouldn’t have feelings for in the first place. 

Tony turned around and looked over at him. “Bud? What’s wrong? You’re kind of freaking me out right now by just standing there, not saying anything. You know I quit my game for you. I was doing well.” 

“Sorry!” He apologized without thinking, and saw Tony grin at him. He sighed, then walked over to their parents wet bar. “I’m going to pour a drink.” 

“Jesus, what’s wrong?” Tony was soon by his side at the wet bar, taking the bottle of whiskey he’d picked up from his hands. “Pete, you don’t drink. You’re the good son. I’m the asshole son that does things like that.” 

“It just feels like I need a drink.” Peter sighed, as he leaned against the mahogany bar. “Are you telling me I can’t, when we both know you’re also not twenty-one and really shouldn’t be drinking either?” 

He watched as Tony poured himself three fingers worth of brown liquor into a glass. “Well, whatever it is you want to talk to me about, it sure seems like I’m going to need this.” He raised his glass towards Peter, who rolled his eyes. “Cheers.” Tony took a sip, then made a face. “I think Dad switched out the good stuff for the shitty brand. This tastes awful.” 

“Probably because he knows you’ve been drinking it.” He smirked, feeling himself relax a little more. “Are you in a relationship right now?” 

Tony took another sip, that grimace returning to his face. “Me? Why do you ask?” 

“Why do you always have to answer my questions with a question of your own?”  

“Because I’m a curious person. Sue me.” Tony made a face, which made him chuckle. “No, I’m not in a relationship right now with anyone. I’m dating a few people, but it’s nothing serious.” 

“Why not?” 

“What do you mean, why not?”  

“I mean, I don’t think I’ve ever seen you in a serious relationship.” 

An annoyed huff left his older brother’s mouth. “Not that it’s any of your business, but I did have a long relationship. Don’t you remember what last year was like?” 

“I guess I forgot.” That wasn’t true. He remembered when Tony and his girlfriend had broken up. She had dumped him because he wasn’t doing the things she wanted. He remembered hearing them argue often. It had killed him, having to listen to her talk to him that way. All he wanted to do was protect his older brother, but that wasn’t his place. Although he wished it was. “But what about now? Why not now?” 

He watched Tony slam back the rest of his whiskey. “I’m not drunk enough yet.” He couldn’t imagine what the hell he meant by that statement, and watched as he poured more of the brown liquid into his glass. “Why did you want to talk to me?” 

“Why does my question make you want to get drunk?” 

“That isn’t what you wanted to ask me, because that just happened.” 

Peter wasn’t going to back down. “Answer that, and then I’ll talk to you about what I really want to discuss with you.” 

“I’m not in a relationship with someone right now because I’m crushing on someone that doesn’t know I exist.” Tony took another mouthful of whiskey, Peter’s eyes watching as his Adam’s apple bobbed up and down with the swallow. “Happy?” 

“Not really.” He sighed, and leaned against the wet bar, his chest pushing against it while he saw Tony was leaning his back against it. “That makes me sad to hear.” 

“You and me both.” The rest of the liquor disappeared, and as he reached for another, Peter put his hand on his wrist. “Don’t, Pete. Not right now.” 

He didn’t budge, though. “The reason I wanted to talk to you was because I’m sort of in the same position and I don’t know what I should do.” 

“You like a girl?” 

“I didn’t say girl.” 

That made his brother turn towards him with a surprised look on his face. “Is he older? Younger?” 

“Older.” Peter pushed himself off the bar, and walked over to the couch, dropping down on it with a sigh. “Doesn’t know I exist. Probably better that way.” 

“Don’t sell yourself short.” He noticed that Tony didn’t bother to grab more booze, which made him mildly happy. Although he was probably going to go racing for it again if he got the guts to be honest with him. The couch cushion lifted up a little as Tony sat down next to him, Peter turning towards him. “You’re really attractive, Pete. I doubt you realize how good looking you really are.” 

“L-Likewise, Tony.” They looked at each other, the same color eyes - their mother’s. “Whoever you’re crushing on - they deserve to know. They might make you happy. You haven’t been happy in a long time.” 

Tony looked away first. “You aren’t supposed to notice those things.” The quiet tone that Tony spoke with made his chest ache. “I’m the one that’s supposed to be taking care of you, not the other way around.” 

“We’re supposed to take care of each other.” Peter reminded him. “That’s what family’s about, right? Looking out for one another when no one else bothers.” 

The sharp laugh that left Tony’s mouth hurt his ears, making him wince a little. “You have no idea what you’re talking about, Pete.” 

“Then talk to me!” He begged, wanting to know why his brother always looked so sad. “I want to help you, Tony!” 

“You can’t!” 

“Why not??”

“Because you’re the one I’ve got a crush on!” 

Peter stared at him, the ache in his chest disappearing as his stomach began to feel hot. His entire body felt like it was on fire as he repeated Tony’s words over in his mind. No way. There was no way he could be this lucky. Was it true? Did Tony really like him like that?? Has he been making him miserable without realizing it?? Oh, no. That realization hurt, but it was minuscule compared to the happiness that was starting to flood his system. 

He got up from the couch, and saw Tony wouldn’t look at him. He could see his chest rising and falling with rapid breaths, no doubt scared by what his reaction was going to be to his confession. And all Peter could do was stare at him, and wish that he would look at him. But since it seemed that that wasn’t going to happen, he had to take matters into his own hands. Watching half a step, he sat down on Tony’s lap, and felt him jump. 

“Pete, what are-” 

“No.” He shook his head, and put his fingers against his lips. “Now it’s my turn. You confessed to me, so you deserve to hear my own confession.” Brown eyes stared at him with that haunted look that he hated seeing in his brother’s eyes. “You love me?” Tony nodded his head slowly. “The guy I like?” Peter swallowed, his mouth now dry due to his own paranoia. “It’s you, Tony.” 

The world seemed to stop moving as they stared at one another, neither saying a word. Peter could feel his heart pounding hard in his chest, his ears ringing, too afraid to look away but too scared to say anything else. He dropped his hand away from Tony’s face, the expression there one he wasn’t sure how to read. Was it hopeful? Upset? Disgusted? But it couldn’t be that last one, because Tony had just told him he had a crush on him. Not Dave the senior quarterback, not Pam the head cheerleader, but him. His younger brother. 

“Since when?” 

“Since always?” Peter shrugged his shoulders, happy that Tony said something to him. “I don’t know. I just….I remember how hurt you were last year when you guys broke up, and that hurt me. A lot.” Peter tucked his head down, as he remembered hearing Tony cry in his bedroom. He’d cried then a lot too, because there wasn’t anything he could do to help him. “I think I knew then that I really liked you, but then - I know I’m not supposed to.” 

“You’re right.” Tony put his arms around him, the touch making him close his eyes as hope began to bloom in his chest. But he was too scared to open his eyes and look at him, afraid of what he might find there if he did. “Peter - you’re not supposed to feel that way about me.” 

“And you are?” That comment made him angry. Looking up, he stared defiantly into his eyes. “That’s not fair, Tony. You tell me you’ve got a crush on me, and I’m telling you it’s the same. Now you’re telling me no? Fuck you.” He started to get up off of his lap, wanting to put himself as far away from him as possible. “This was stupid. I shouldn’t have bothered you. Just - just pretend I didn’t say anything okay?” He tried not to cry, he didn’t want Tony to pity him, but the tears were already streaming down his face. 

“Pete, wait.” 

“No.” He shook his head, already heading towards the door. “Have a good night, Tony. Sorry to have bothered you.” Without another look back, he raced up the stairs, away from his brother, away from what will now be his living nightmare. 

“Honey?” He heard his mom knock on the door a little later. “Are you alright?” 

“I’m fine, Mom.” Wiping his eyes, he hoped that it didn’t sound like he’d been crying. “Is dinner almost ready?” 

“Yes. Did something happen with you and your brother?” 

The pit in his stomach seemed to grow wider at his mother’s question. “No, I don’t think so? Why?” 

“Because Tony left about fifteen minutes ago. I know you two were talking, but then I heard you come upstairs, and he left, and-” 

Wiping his face, he got up and went to the door. “Did he take the car?” 

“No, he left on foot. Did something happen?” 

“It’s okay, Mom. I’ll take care of it.” Peter sighed, as he raced back down the stairs. Putting his shoes on by the front door, he grabbed his jacket and as an afterthought grabbed Tony’s, as it looked like he left without bothering to put it on. 

The wind whipped his hair, the sinking sun causing the temperature to drop faster than normal on this crisp autumn day. Peter jogged down the street and made a turn, then saw the park up ahead. He knew that’s where Tony liked to go and clear his mind. Maybe he wasn’t supposed to know, but that didn’t matter right now. What mattered was that he had to see him, because there was no way he was going to live with this awful feeling in his gut for the rest of their time together before Tony went off to college. 

“Did Mom rat me out?” Tony asked, as Peter approached where he was sitting on top of the jungle gym. “I told her I’d be back soon.” 

He tossed him his jacket. “You forgot that.” 

“Thanks.” 

“Why are you out here?” Peter stayed on the ground, looking up at him. 

“You ran away first. I just did it better.” 

“That’s not fair.” 

“It’s the truth, though.” 

Peter knew it was, and couldn’t deny it. “I don’t know what you want me to do, Tony. What was I supposed to do? Kiss you? I’ve never kissed anyone in my life. I’m probably bad at it. Hug you? You don’t like hugs.” 

“I do when they’re from you.” 

That caused the hole in his stomach to slowly close up. “Tell me what I’m supposed to do. I don’t want to feel like this.” 

“Like what?” 

“Like there’s a piece of me that’s missing.” Peter could hear Tony moving on the jungle gym, but refused to look up. “I don’t like this pain. Don’t shut me out because we were honest with each other.” 

“You know that we can’t do anything about it.” 

This time, he looked up. “Why not?” 

“Because we’d get in a lot of trouble.” 

“Not if we did it behind closed doors.” 

“You’re going to want more than that. And I can’t give it to you.” 

It was true - he knew that he would. He would want to be able to hold Tony’s hand, rest his head on his shoulder at school, walk down the hallways with him like that. But because they were brothers, that was a big fat nope. “I can get over it.” 

“What if I can’t?” 

He wanted to pull on his hair with how difficult Tony was being right now. Not that he didn’t expect it, because it seemed that Peter always knew how to really get Tony upset. It’s been that way for as long as he can remember. He turned to look at him, trying not to feel as lost as he felt. “Then you’re being selfish about this, when you shouldn’t be. I can handle it.” 

“What are you suggesting we do, then? We can’t be in a real relationship.” 

“Why not?” Peter knew he could handle it if they did things at home together. It would hurt if he started to date someone, but from the way it sounded, Tony wasn’t really looking for anyone except him. “I know you don’t think we can, but we can try. If it doesn’t work, then it’s back to how things are now.” He didn’t want that, but he would take it over not knowing what it would feel like to be with the person he loved.  

Tony came up to him, their height difference making Peter feel small in comparison to him. “Go home, Pete. I’ll be home in a bit.” 

“Fine.” He took off, knowing that it would be a waste of his time to try and talk some sense into Tony. He gave him ideas, now it was his turn to see if he would listen to them and try and make them work. All the way home his eyes burned with unshed tears. He refused to let them fall until he was back in his bedroom, behind the closed door. Once he was alone, he crumbled as he knew that he’d more than likely just lost the one person that meant more than anything to him in his life. 

***

Peter acted cordially to Tony in the morning, pretending like nothing had been confessed the day before. He stayed friendly, putting on the appearance so that neither their mother or father could question them. If he didn’t act this way, then there would be concern. And right now, he didn’t want there to be any concern - not when they weren’t speaking to each other. 

He waited for Tony to take the car to school before leaving on foot. Tony had an earlier class than him, which was why he never rode to school with him and instead walked the mile on his own. It was good exercise. But as he walked to school, he saw Tony’s car parked on the side of the road. Great. 

Tempted to walk past it, he knew that if he did, Tony would give him hell. So, he walked over to the car, tapped on the window and then heard him unlock the car. He sat down, and stared out the windshield, not at all interested in talking to him. If he was going to be a stubborn dick to him, he could give it right back, equally if not more so. 

“I was an asshole yesterday.” Not bothering to say anything, Peter remained quiet. “I didn’t have any right to push you away like that. Pete, we can’t.” 

“Fine. Can I go?” He didn’t want to be sitting here next to him, feeling his heart breaking all over again. He couldn’t be crying all day in class. He already got picked on for being one of the smaller guys, add a crying mess to it and that was a recipe for disaster. “Unlock the car, Tony.” 

“No.” 

Hugging his backpack to his chest, Peter continued to stare out the window. “We can’t because you’re not even willing to try.” 

“What about Homecoming, huh? I can’t take you to that. I have to go with Margie. I asked her a few weeks ago.” 

His chest tightened as he heard Tony talk about one of his close friends, but he knew that that’s all they were - friends. “I didn’t ask you to take me to homecoming, asshole. I said we could do everything behind closed doors. We can spend more time together alone than we would at school, showing PDA to everyone.” 

“You’re not going to like it.” 

“You don’t know that.” 

“I don’t want to hurt you, Peter.” 

Hearing his brother call him by his full name made the pain increase in his chest. “You’re already doing that right now, Anthony.” He knew it was a low blow, but if Tony wasn’t going to call him Pete, then he was going to use his full first name too. “What’s a little more pain?” 

“You can be such a little bitch, you know that?” 

“Likewise.” 

A hand touched his thigh, startling him. He hadn’t expected Tony to touch him, and now that he was, his heart had jumped into his throat. “I told you that I was in love with you last night. Do you know what I wanted to do?” 

“Kill yourself?” 

“Not funny, asshole.” 

Closing his eyes, he sighed. “Sorry.” 

“Apology accepted.” The hand on his thigh had yet to move. It was a comforting weight - one he could always count on when feeling blue. “No, all I was thinking about last night was going to your room and telling you I was sorry. But I couldn’t.” 

“Because you’re too stubborn.” 

He could see Tony nodding his head in his peripheral vision. “I am. You know I am. But if I could do it all over again, I would have come to your room and held you all night.” 

“Please don’t do this.” He whispered, tears threatening to fall from his eyes again. “I can’t go to school like this.” 

“Then don’t.” 

“What??” 

Tony turned on the car. “Mom and Dad leave for work at what? Eight? We’ll drive around, and then we’ll go back home. Ditch together. When they get home, we’ll act like we went to school. No big deal.” 

“We can’t ditch, Tony.” 

“Sure we can.” They pulled away from the curb, Tony taking a right at the next street. “How about we go and get some breakfast? You want Wendys?” 

“We just ate!” 

His brother’s laugh made the lead that had appeared in his stomach the moment he’d sat down in the car slowly disappear. “Please, you and I both know we can eat a lot more food than that. Where’s your sense of adventure?” 

“Why are you doing this?” Peter couldn’t understand what Tony’s logic was with this line of thinking. “We have to go to school, Tony.” 

“God, you’re so good, aren’t you?” Fingers tousled his hair, Peter’s heart jumping at the touch. “How are we related? It’s a crime. You should be more like me. You’re too good. It’s an annoying quality to have, Pete.” 

He pushed his hand away, laughing. “You’re such a dick, Tony.” 

“You’re right, I am. But that’s why you love me, right? Because I’m a class A dick.” 

“And dingus.” 

“Jesus, what are we, ten now?” 

Peter laughed more as he dropped his bag on the floor, feeling foolish. Pulling his phone out, he sent a text to his best friend. “Won’t be in class today. Food poisoning. Whole fam. Get homework for me?” He looked over at Tony. “I told Ned we have food poisoning.” 

“Guess I should do the same, huh.” 

“When you’re not driving, please.” Peter knew he really didn’t have to say that, but did anyway as he knew it would probably bug Tony. “How about we go and get donuts?” 

“That’s way better than what I suggested. You got the cash?” 

“Oh my God, you’re older than me.” He pushed Tony’s shoulder, and saw him smiling - really smiling, which made his stomach do a somersault. “Yes, I’ve got cash, you broke bitch.” 

“Fuck you too, buddy.” 

They drove to their favorite donut shop and ordered a dozen donuts, and after eating two in the car, they headed back to their house. It was half past eight, which meant no one was home. Peter hoped that their nosy neighbors wouldn’t snitch on them being home, and if they did, then Peter would tell the same lie to his mother that he told Ned. They both weren’t feeling well so they came home. 

Peter looked at Tony when they got into the kitchen, wondering what he wanted to do. Where he wanted to go. To the rec room? To the bedroom? Was that too forward? But then, all those questions were pushed to the back of his mind as he saw Tony walking towards him. He held his breath, waiting for him to go around him, but when he came to stop directly in front of him, he felt like the ground was going to swallow him up. 

“Hey, Pete.” There was a cocky smirk on his brother’s face, one he’d seen thousands of times directed to other people - but never to him. Until now, that is. “I know this great place. Feel like following me?” 

He nodded his head, afraid that if he spoke he’d sound like a dumb sixteen year old, which he was but that didn’t matter. Tony grabbed his hand and pulled him up the stairs, Peter trying not to trip over his own feet as his body didn’t seem to remember how to work as he was led to Tony’s bedroom. He yanked him into his room, Peter falling onto his bed with a groan as Tony pushed the door closed. 

The nervousness he felt was making him feel physically sick. He could feel the donuts wanting to work their way back up his throat, but he refused to let that happen. Tony laid down next to him, the two of them now laying side by side, staring at each other. “Hey, Pete.” Tony said again, that cocky smirk back on his lips. “You doin’ okay?” 

“N-Not really.” He shook his head, trying not to hyperventilate. 

“I’ve been thinking, we should just try it.” Peter’s heart lurched as he felt Tony’s hand touch his face. “It’s going to be difficult, though. I know me, and I’m going to want you all to myself and I won’t be able to have that.” 

“Y-You can have it here.” Closing his eyes, he brought his head to be a little closer to his brother’s. “No one can tell us what’s right and wrong in here. It’s just the two of us.” 

“Just the two of us….” Tony started to sing that song, serenading him with a breathy voice which made Peter laugh. “I’ll stop.” 

“Please.” 

His heart sped up again as Tony pressed his forehead against his own. “I love you so much, Pete. I don’t want you to hate me if we do things together. You know that all my relationships end in a ball of flames. I don’t want that with you.” 

“We’re not in a relationship, remember?” Peter knew what Tony meant, and he was scared for that too. “We’re brothers.” 

“I’m going to go on dates.” 

“I know.” 

“Get married.” 

“I know.” 

“But you will always be my soulmate.” 

Peter couldn’t stop the tears from falling from his eyes, as he tried to look into the same colored eyes as his own. But all he saw were more tears, as he became emotionally imbalanced by what Tony had just said to him. “Y-You don’t believe in that stuff.” 

“I also don’t like hugs, but I told you that I like them from you. I know you believe in soulmates, and it makes sense. We’re meant to be together.” Tony’s face was becoming more clear as the tears fell down his cheeks. “Are those happy tears, baby brother?” 

“Y-Yes.” He sniffled, nodding his head. “They are.” 

“You know this isn’t going to be easy.” 

“I don’t care.” 

“You will.” 

“Tony, please trust-” 

His words were cut off by the softest pair of lips touching his own. He didn’t know what to do. Peter absorbed the kisses that Tony kept touching his lips with, and then remembered that he could return them himself, so he plumped up his lips and kissed him back. It wasn’t like any kiss he’d ever had before - he’d kissed a few girls in junior high and a couple in high school, but nothing had ever felt like this. He brought his hand up to Tony’s face, and heard him laugh softly but it wasn’t a teasing laugh. It was a warm laugh that filled his soul with light as he kissed him more. Their tongues touched with hesitant strokes, but the more he moaned the more possessive they became as Tony’s tongue filled his mouth. 

They somehow wound up under the covers, as if the sheets would protect them from the naughtiness they knew they were engaging in. But Peter didn’t feel naughty - he felt whole. Like a piece of him that had been missing the entire time was now back with him. He could hear Tony laughing more, the sound joyous. It was perfect. 

Clothes were discarded, the two of them soon laying next to one another in the bed as naked as they were the day they had been born. “Have you had sex before?” Tony asked, as his hand touched his hip. 

“M-Me? No, of course not.” Peter shook his head. “I’ve barely gone to second base.” 

“I have.” 

“With girls?” 

“Both.” 

That was news to Peter. “Huh. I had no idea. Was it consensual?” 

“Of course.” 

“Good.” He smiled, trying not to feel a tiny bit jealous that Tony had gone so much further than him. But then again, his brother was pretty popular, and knew all the right people so it really shouldn’t surprise him that he’d had sex like that. “I haven’t. No oral, barely a hand job.” 

Lips touched his with a soft kiss. “That’s a tragedy. We’ll fix that.” 

“Will we?” He asked, slightly breathless as he could feel Tony’s lips now touching his jaw. “W-What are you thinking about doing with me?” 

“Everything.” 

He moaned softly, and nodded his head. “I’d like that.” Tony’s hand touched his chest, the soft tips of his fingers sliding down towards his belly button. 

“I know, Pete.” Tony’s lips touched his again with another soft kiss. 

Their kiss began to deepen, and soon he felt the weight of Tony’s body on top of his own. His heart was beating quick, as he struggled to stay calm as he felt Tony’s cock push up against his own. The heat was overwhelming, his head leaning back against the pillow as a soft moan spilled past his lips. “T-Tony…. “

“No one’s home right now.” The words were meant to be encouraging, but they only drew attention to the fact that they were doing something they shouldn’t be doing. “Be loud for me, Pete. I might not be able to hear you be loud ever again.” 

He knew that that was probably correct. Their walls were rather thin, so in the future they would have to be quiet but right now? Right now they could be noisy as all hell. Peter moaned loud as Tony’s hand touched both of their cocks. He could feel how much thicker his cock was to his own. His was thin and skinny, while Tony’s was girthy and full. He could feel the heat building in his lower stomach, as Tony’s hand began to pump both of their cocks at the same time. 

“Will you come for me, Pete?” He stared up at Tony who had an expression on his face that he knew would forever be cemented into his mind. It’s one he would think of often, in probably the worst circumstances but that wouldn’t matter. All he saw right now on his brother’s face was love and acceptance, which was more than he ever thought he’d be privy to after their blow up yesterday. 

“Y-Yes, Tony…” He nodded, knowing that he wouldn’t be able to stop himself. The touch to his cock was like magic - it was spreading warmth throughout his entire body the closer and closer he got to an orgasm. “B-But we won’t stop, will we…?” 

Tony’s chest touched his as their lips came together for a soft kiss “No, baby….We’ve got all day to fool around…” 

“A-All day…” Peter’s toes began to curl as the heat started to return. “O-Oh, God….” 

“Don’t be afraid, Peter…” 

Always words of comfort from his brother. Tony always knew what to say to make him feel good. “T-Tony….” He moaned his brother’s name loud as he began to come hard, the heat of his cum splashing onto his stomach and chest. He felt more pour onto him as thick globs came out of the tip of Tony’s cock, Peter reaching down to push his fingers through their mixed mess as he breathed hard through the aftershocks of his release. 

Tony’s lips returned to his as he carefully moved off of his body to lay next to him. “You’re gorgeous when you come, Pete.” 

“T-Thanks? I think?” He opened his eyes, a breathless laugh leaving his throat as he looked up at Tony. “Now what?” 

“Think you can handle a little more?” 

“I think so.” Peter nodded, as he saw Tony grab something from his nightstand. “Are we going to have sex?” 

“If you want?” 

“Is it too fast??” 

“Pete, we’ve known each other our entire lives. It’s not too fast.” Tony shook his head, that smirk back on his lips. “Come on - live a little.” 

Blushing, he gave a small nod. “Y-Yeah, okay. Let’s do it.” 

“That’s what I like to hear.” 

Tony made sure that everything was perfect. Peter knew that he could trust his brother to take care of him. He’d come again without meaning to; Tony’s fingers had felt really good inside of him that he got excited and accidentally started to come. But Tony didn’t seem to mind - all he kept saying was how beautiful he looked when he was brought to an orgasm. Peter wanted to cry, because it was so nice. It was more than he expected. 

The sheet lifted up, Tony now poised between his legs. “You ready?” He asked, their eyes locking together. “Last chance to say no, Pete.” 

“I’m good.” Peter smiled, hoping that the fear he was feeling wasn’t showing on his face. “S-Show me what it feels like?” 

“I will, baby…” 

It happened slowly. His brother took his time, which Peter was grateful for as his hips stayed still to allow Tony to slip into a part of his body that wasn’t necessarily built for this kind of activity. It was painful - too painful, but Tony distracted him with soft kisses, and words of love as he kept pushing more of his cock into his body. He wanted to cry, but didn’t want his brother to think it was because of the pain. It wasn’t. It was because he was overwhelmed by the feelings he was experiencing, assaulting him all at once. 

The gentle roll of Tony’s hips had him pushing his own hips down, his body finally accepting the intrusion of his brother’s cock inside of his body. The bed bounced as Tony became more enthusiastic with his thrusts, Peter able to handle it with no problem at all. Whatever pain had been there before had disappeared, now only an indescribable heat was flowing through his body, making his chest arch off the bed as he chased after an orgasm he knew was close. 

“T-Touch yourself, Pete…” Tony’s voice pulled him back into the moment, his hand going between their bodies to do as he asked him. “Get yourself off. I’m close….” 

“O-Okay, Tony….” His face was flushed, he could hear his own labored breaths as he alternated between groaning and moaning with each thrust of Tony’s hips. He could feel that heat building again in his lower stomach, his body on the precipice of exploding. His mind went blank as his hand flew over his cock - this was Tony, the only person he cared about in any sort of fashion, and they were having sex. Together. 

“Pete…” 

He opened his eyes and saw Tony looking down at him, the smirk no longer on his lips but had been replaced with a tender smile that made his heart burst. He tried to say his brother’s name but couldn’t as his mouth had gone dry. His limbs felt like they were on fire as he began to come, moaning helplessly as his seed spread all over his stomach and chest. He heard Tony moan so loud that it should have hurt his ears, but didn’t. It was the sweetest sound he’d ever heard, and as it carried on he felt something wet flowing into him. He groaned low, grabbing onto Tony’s shoulder to pull him down to him, needing to kiss him. As Tony’s lips touched his, he completely melted away as their connection kept them together for a few more precious seconds. 

A soft grunt left his mouth as Tony rolled off of him. “Turn on your side, Pete.” He nodded, and did as instructed, then watched Tony grab his towel from the back of his chair and brought it over to the bed. “Gotta get you cleaned up.” 

“T-Thanks, Tony.” He tried not to squirm as the soft terry cloth touched his very sensitive ass. Tony laid back down beside him after wiping off himself, as well as Peter’s chest and stomach. “That was nice.” Peter whispered, as he moved to be against his brother’s side. 

“If you liked that, then wait until I suck your cock.” 

“I bet that will be nice too.” His cheeks burned as he thought about Tony on his knees. “T-This is okay, right? You’re not going to change your mind tomorrow?” 

“I don’t think so. That was the best sex I’ve ever had.” 

“Thanks? I think?” 

Tony touched his chin, his head tilting up to look at him. “No matter what you see me do, remember what I said to you, ok? I don’t want to hurt you.” 

“I know you don’t.” Peter could feel the tears wanting to return. “Soulmates.” 

“Right.” 

He took a deep breath, and rested his head on Tony’s shoulder. “Can we do that again?” 

“Baby, we’re going to do that all day.” 

“Cool.” 

***

At school the next day, Peter had to walk carefully, his body sore in places it had never been sore before. After a couple of times of having sex in Tony’s bed, they had gone to his bedroom and tried it out there. And then in the kitchen, with him bent over the counter - which had been really nice. Then once in the rec room, and then once in their parents bed, and that had been exciting. 

As he walked towards his locker, he saw Tony leaning up against them, chatting up with one of the more popular girls in his grade. He could see her flirting up a storm with him, and saw that smirk that Tony always wore when flirting. But then, their eyes met and he saw the look in his eyes that he’d seen so much the day before. He gave his brother a smile, then carried on down the hall. Peter knew that Tony was his - he would always be his, because they were meant for each other.

[onyxoverride]

Im still sitting here, thinking about Twitch Streamer! Zeke. He gets really, really hypercompetitive even if it’s one of those really complex first person shooter games or a challenge with a wholesome game. Its pretty self explanatory when it comes to ranked games but for wholesome games... maybe maximizing profits in a farming game like Stardew Valley or a speed run of who can make the most aesthetically pleasing island in Animal Crossing between him and his twitch friends in a set amount of time. They’d stream for a set amount of time so their audiences get to see their progress (twitch streamer!Pieck wins every time and he’s always salty about it. Swears that they should have blind judging. They do and Pieck still wins).

I can see him also doing a lot of strategy and skill games that require a lot of skill honing. He’s ridiculously good at shooting games from years of COD and the like. I can see him doing Pokemon nuzlockes and gets super attached to his team. He computes his chances and researches everything so they all survive, cocky and a bit too confident. He even shows off the spread sheets he’s made and he’s way too proud of them. He gets so mad when he gets KO’d by some attack that was less likely to happen. One time, he had to take a long break and end his stream early after his starter died. He’s known for his contained rage and rants about how things were supposed to go HIS way, not some numbers programmed into this machine box. (It goesnt help that he throws back his head and groans with that deep voice of his 😳)

But he’s chill too. He plays Animal Crossing noncompetitively and just chats with his, um, chat. He even tries out some games his chat tells him to. I don’t think he’ll play very story heavy games but his chat loves his blunt and dry comments about the plot and the in-game logic. His chat once convinced him to play Hatoful Boyfriend and you can see him visibly TORTURED by the plot and its nonsensicalness but his audience LOVES it (“how does a bird be a waiter? Hm? First of all, he had no hands to do labor such as handle and send out orders, second, isNT THAT A HEALTH VIOLATION?! Like it or not, birds can carry pathogens harmful to humans- I would never go to this cafe.”). But another bird related game he actually enjoyed was Untitled Goose Game. He loved the chaos he brought the townsfolk while his little goose had a little cute bow on. He never extends his stream but does it JUST for Untitled Goose game.

He does give in and goes for games like What Remains of Edith Finch and while his audience knows him to be this cynical, realistic, blunt man, he showed that he had a sensitive side to him as well. He’s not a dick when it comes to sensitive material and acts serious and does a little PSA of what he knows and encourages everyone to do more reseach on sensitive topcs. His audience can at least rest easy that he’s not one of those assholes.

He shows off this more soft, sensitive side when his s/o drops by. They know when he gets kind of worked up from a game while in stream so they just bring him coffee or a lil snack to brighten his spirits. Chat goes ‘huh’ when they see Zeke smile genuinely for once, saying “Thanks for the coffee, sweetheart. Just what I needed.” in a really sweet tone thats a far cry from his usual demeanor. He immediately recovers and does another round of whatever it was he was playing. He gets boastful when you bring him up a slice of his favorite cake, telling the chat “if you guys would hate on me, hate on me for scoring the jackpot in romance. I have the best damn s/o in exsistence, it should be illegal. Illegal.”

He gets carried away once, wanting a kiss after you’d bring him his coffee for the stream. For a split second, you show up in frame and the chat goes nuts, asking if they could finally meet you. Zeke has fun with this, teasing his chat with stuff like, “oh? Please, you wouldn’t be able to handle how gorgeous they are.” and “you’d all combust in front of your screens from how hot they are.”. It’s really more on if you’re comfortable showing your face to his stream and he respects your decision. He’ll happily tease his chat about it going, “wow, a lot of you are s*mps for my s/o and you’ve literally only seen their hands and maybe their hair- you guys got it bad.” But does address it seriously if it gets out of hand.

When you do agree and show yourself, Zeke has you sit on his lap, a hand on your thigh and another one on your waist. It was like he was boasting some sort of trophy while you wave shyly to chat and how enthusiastic they are to finally meet you. You appear in some other streams, playing with him in competitive games sitting next to each other. Chat expects him to snap at you or something but he takes any defeat with grace, a slight frown on his face but will smile widely as you taunt him jokingly. There’s this one playstation co-op game i cant remember the name of where you have to use the same controller to win. It’s just a light hearted stream of the two of you egging on the other for not reacting fast enough or complaining about how bad the other is. Chat gladly becomes third wheel as enjoy yourselves. Truly one of twitch’s solid couples.

Scrolling up and seeing the amout ive written is disgusting (bc i sent this in as an ask) feel free to delete im just here to share with with u 👉👈🥺

Pls never be disgusted with how much you send, I love getting asks like these because it's obvious you're enjoying yourself and I love that!!

I can imagine you bringing him coffee and he stands up to hide your face a bit and kiss you but he kisses you a bit to long and too heated so you say "Dont do that, you'll get me riled up" and he goes red because "babe that mic can still hear us..."

Even though it's a bit embarrassing you laugh, "Well now they know you're good at other things besides video games," you leave him with a kiss.

When he goes back to streaming he's red as hell and scratching his ear a bit, completely flustered as he tries to continue nonchalantly and ignore the chat for a second.

He does fawn over you on stream. Chat asks about you and he's immediately looking a little softer, more in love. Teases them, "I don't know, maybe i want to keep them for myself, my little secret."

If they ever get go meet you it's a whole event, Zeke teasingly hypes you up and the chat goes crazy because wow, you're beautiful. He's like "This is my beautiful wonderful secret now not-so-secret significant other!"

Then you start playing together or him coaching you through. Which gets frustrating because he tries to be in control and you just got to say "Zekey I know you love to be in control but if you try to backseat game me like that I will hurt you," and he backs off and says sorry.

Chat teases him for being called "Zekey" and even his Streamer friends tease him but he's like "only they can call me that."

If he ever meets pushy fangirls that are bound to go "Zekey!" Even though he's made it clear only you can call him that he immediately is eyebrow raised, "who are you talking to? And don't flirt with me." Very blunt about it.

[phobiadeficient]

If you wouldn't mind, could you do a scout x fem sniper? I've seen stories of both females or femscout, but not very often does fem snipes get any love.

welcome to “this request got out of hand and i basically just wrote 5k words of scout tf2 being a goddamn simp”

(no warnings)

-

How the fuck was it that Scout kept ending up head over heels for women who both could and would kill him without any hesitation? Hell, maybe he had a type of something. Who knows?

And he’d kind of done a joke about it, when he heard there was a girl on the team, right? Been all ‘hey, hell yeah, at least boredom won’t be an issue!’, right? And then he’d gone to meet the team and for a minute he’d figured it was the Pyro since he didn’t exactly see a lady and the flamesuit didn’t give out much information. But then he’d seen the figure sitting off to one side facing away from him with the wide-brimmed hat pulled down low and the big shooter’s glasses and the crossed arms and the braid that just barely reached her back and he pieced together some stuff. So he walked over and introduced himself with a handshake and all because he was trying to be polite to everyone up front, good first impression and all, and apparently then he made a mistake, because he called her ‘Miss’.

And then suddenly that handshake turned into his wrist being bent in completely the wrong direction, and her standing up and holy shit she was tall and her voice was way deeper than he’d expected as she calmly informed him that if he called her ‘Miss’ again she would be packing him up in a burlap sack and sending him on a long roll down a short pier, and in fact that her name was Sniper and he could call her that and only that, clear?

So pretty much she was way more intimidating than he would ever be and he was a little annoyed with himself about how hot he found that.

Just his fuckin’ luck, that his nerves got the best of him so bad whenever he really had a thing for a girl, made him act like such an idiot. And he already kind of had his shit wrecked in front of the team once and he wasn’t looking to be turned into the official laughingstock of the group, so he tried his best to leave her alone and steer clear of her before he looked like a complete idiot.

It was just that holy shit she was tall, and every once and a while he would see her in the common area reading a book—like, an actual one—and her voice was kinda gravelly and she could pop a guy’s head from a hundred and fifty feet without even thinking about it and this one time when most of the team was waiting outside the infirmary for Medic to fix them up from battle she fell asleep in the chair across from him and her glasses were all crooked and her hat was lopsided and it was just really really cute—

Okay, so he had a thing for her. The main issue was that he didn’t know what the fuck to do about it.

Because, like—she was so fuckin’ cool. And he hadn’t talked to her much for not wanting to look like an idiot reasons, but he’d gathered that while she wasn’t, like, twelve PhDs or mad doctor kinds of intelligent, she was pretty damn smart. And she wasn’t exactly Doris Day or whatever, but he thought she was pretty in a different sort of way. In a could-kick-his-ass kind of way. And also she had a bunch of freckles, which he was just all about.

But he didn’t have the best track record when it came to cool, smart, attractive women wanting to associate with him. Namely, they just straight up didn’t. Mostly they called him annoying or laughed in his face when he hit on them.

Which you would think would start to hurt less after a while, but boy, would you be wrong.

Then again... hey, his luck had to turn around eventually, right?

That’s what led to him putting on the only shirt with buttons that he owned and a pair of nice-ish pants and strolling all the way out to the camper van she lived in instead of the room they had for her in the base.

He knocked, and for a good ten seconds he didn’t hear anything at all and thought maybe she wasn’t even in and he’d have to do a walk of shame all the way back, but then he heard the sound of movement within and a good ten seconds after that, she opened the door.

She was clearly trying to wind down after work, down to her tank top but still in her boots and shades for some reason, and most notably she was holding that big fuckoff knife she always carried into battle. She stared at him, expression flat.

“Uh,” Scout said, eyeing the knife, thrown entirely off of his game for a second.

She went to shut the door again.

“Aw, c’mon, wait a sec!” he whined in protest, stopping the door with his hand. “I haven’t even said anything yet!”

“You had a look on your face like you were planning to ask me to prom,” she deadpanned, and he flushed.

“Did not!” he protested.

She sighed hard, opening the door again. “Alright, then what’s all this, then?” she asked, gesturing loosely at his outfit with the knife.

“Uh,” he started, and fought hard to kick his brain back into motion, to try to piece back together the script he’d had in his head, but they were already wildly off track. “Uh, I was uh—I was just, y’know, I was wondering, if you’re—are you uh, busy?”

She stared at him. “...Am I busy,” she repeated, and he realized how dumb that sounded. Of course she wasn’t busy. None of them except maybe the eggheads were ever busy.

“I uh I meant did you have—y’know, plans or anything? Tonight?” he tried. She raised an eyebrow. “I mean y’know because I was just kinda wondering if maybe you’d wanna go and uh—and get a drink or somethin’. With me, later. Uh, tonight.”

“Mate, you wanna take another run at that without the stutter?” she asked, voice still flat, but her expression had shifted a little, the slightest quirk to her lip.

He forced himself to take a deep breath, shelving his pride for the moment. “Do you wanna go get drinks with me tonight?” he tried, and forced a hard stop at the end, biting his tongue before he could keep rambling and ruin it.

She looked at him. Moved to lean her shoulder against the door, to cross her arms. He glanced at the knife and back up to her face again. Her expression was hard to read.

“What, at a bar? In town?” she asked, tone a little lighter.

“I mean, yeah, sure, whatever’s cool,” he shrugged. “I’ve—I’ve got a motorcycle. Or, uh, I could borrow Demo’s car maybe, he uh, he’s really cool about lending it to me whenever as long as like, like if I’m heading to get food or something I bring back somethin’ for him, and I gotta pay for gas if it’s a long way or whatever but I figure that’s probably fair since I’m the one usin’ it most of the time anyways, I figure that’s a fair trade-off—“

“Scout,” she cut in, and he shut up. She paused. “Rather not go to a bar, if I’m being honest.”

His shoulders sank. “Oh. Uh, yeah, okay, that’s—that’s fair, I uh I totally get it—“

“But I‘ve got drinks here,” she cut him off again, voice raised a little to be heard over his mumbling, and when he looked up she had an eyebrow raised again. “Swing by ‘round nine or so, yeah?”

“Oh. Oh! Uh, no, yeah, totally!” he agreed quickly.

“In something besides the polo, if you don’t mind,” she deadpanned, head tilting to look at his shirt pointedly. “Aren’t exactly a fancy establishment.”

“Sure, okay,” he nodded, and shuffled on his feet for a second before taking the cue and starting to head off back towards base. “Uh, see you then!”

“Yeah, yeah,” she murmured. A pause. “And if you bring flowers I’m locking the door on you!”

“Hah, sure!” he laughed, and waved, and she went back inside.

Two hours later, a few minutes after nine, he’d changed into something more closely resembling his usual outfit, and noted that Sniper had also changed, just a little, putting on a different shirt he’d never seen her in. He realized belatedly that he’d never actually seen her out of the clothes that made up her uniform. It was a nice shirt. He tried extremely hard not to stare at her chest. He mostly succeeded.

And he was proud to say that if nothing else, he could at least hold his alcohol as well as she could. Most of the guys made fun of him and said he was probably a total lightweight, but he wasn’t actually that bad, mostly on account of eating full meals and getting a lot of exercise. She drank a brand of beer he didn’t know shit about, and it wasn’t the worst he’d ever had. And they talked a bunch, about work mostly, but he went on a bunch of tangents in the middle about other stuff, music and movies and home and stories about all his brothers.

Luckily for him, she was apparently pretty patient, and didn’t get annoyed with him and tell him to leave. Mostly she just sat and listened, nodded along occasionally, snickered at a joke every now and then (which was a grand slam victory every time). And by the time he looked at the clock and realized it was pretty late and he needed to head back, maybe it was just the buzz of the alcohol, but she seemed more relaxed, her usual deadpan replaced by the slightest little smile. She offhandedly mentioned that she wasn’t busy around the same time next week, and maybe they could hit an actual bar or something that time.

And he was through the fuckin’ moon over that already, then he was standing outside the door and trying to agree and make sure she was serious as best he could, stammering like a dumbass probably but she already knew he was a dumbass so it was fine, but then he wasn’t stammering because she tilted his face up and kissed him full on the mouth for one, two, three seconds before pulling back and saying she’d see him later and shutting the door behind her.

And he was about halfway back to base when his brain turned back on, and only barely managed to talk himself down from sprinting directly into the common room and announcing what had just happened to the entire team because holy shit he was pumped. But no, no way, he had to keep cool about this. He didn’t know the most about Sniper, but he knew enough to figure she probably wouldn’t be psyched about that.

So instead he just chilled out and wrote in the date and time on his calendar with minimal exclamation points and calmed down.

Mostly.

And, well, he knew he had kind of... a thing, about jumping into relationships a little too quickly, about zooming around the bases and then promptly striking out next time he tried to talk to a girl again, about seeming like he wasn’t really taking things seriously so the girls he dated also didn’t commit super hard and then lo and behold they think he’s a two-weekends-wonder and wander back off again and leave him by the wayside unless they get bored and circle back, then rinse and repeat.

He knew it was partly his fault, and if he wanted to get taken seriously he should really slow the hell down, and god damn it he was committed to not completely fucking this one up, if nothing else then because any kind of messy breakup was gonna make the next god knew how long out in the desert a real problem.

So he kept his hands to himself as best he could, relying more on bumping elbows or jostling shoulders so she didn’t get the wrong idea, kept the flirting exclusively verbal, and kind of joking even then. 

But also at the end of that actual bar date then she’d kissed him, and kissed him, and kissed him, and she tasted sugary like whatever those technicolor drinks of hers had been called, and she only jokingly complained about how he tasted like tequila, and she smelled like leather and dust and somewhere under that, vanilla—wait, was she wearing perfume? Had she put on perfume for him? Holy shit.

And they were like, right outside the camper, mostly because she’d had just a little bit of trouble standing up and he wanted to make sure she didn’t fall and eat shit on the way back since he was doing just a little bit better, but he had to remind himself over and over, no, no, take it slow, c’mon idiot, don’t ruin this. And so he inched back, kept just a little more distance, and it didn’t take long before Sniper pulled back and glanced him over, from the hands placed at a nice, respectful point on her waist to how he was visibly trying to reorient himself.

“Sorry, mate,” she said, a little quirk of her lip to indicate a smile. “Too much?”

“Uh,” he said, and was cut off as Sniper leaned in and gave him a parting peck on the mouth, followed by a short one to his cheek. “It’s, uh, fine, just, y’know. You’ve had a lot to drink and all and so have I and, y’know, I don’t wanna rush or nothin’—“

“Sweet of you,” Sniper cut in, and that smile was ticking up just a little further. “But it’s alright if you just don’t feel like more than a date, yeah?”

“Uh, yeah,” he said, nodding and then processing what she said a second later. “Uh. I had fun! This was good. Great! Kicked ass!”

“Again soon?” Sniper asked. “Not next weekend, got other business to do, but soon, yeah?”

“Yeah, yeah, totally! Uh, I’ll see you around, uh,” he said, and he had to tip up onto his toes to give her a kiss on the cheek, and then he was bumbling his way through a goodbye.

And then he was in his room jerking off to high heaven, muffled into his hand, mind full of mixed drinks and leather and vanilla and quirked lips and desert heat.

He held himself together for two more outings, once more to a pub and once impromptu in the middle of a Sunday to get tacos from a place Scout liked. And he held himself together almost the whole way through another date in the camper—Sniper made it pretty clear that she liked the privacy of it—even though half of it was spent sitting together on her bed, idly drinking soda and beer and talking about nothing in particular.

But then she was leaning in against his side, a warm weight there, and he couldn’t just not kiss her with her that close, and then he felt her fingertips inching below the collar of his shirt, and it was so damn hot in the camper and he reached for his own shirt and glanced at her with “is this okay?” right on the tip of his tongue but she kissed it right out of him and urged his shirt up and off in a moment.

And before he knew it he was lying on his back and she was half-draped over him, practically pinning him down and kissing him until his head spun and his heart thumped and he hoped to god that she wouldn’t feel that he was getting pretty damn hard already.

“Uh, I-I-I uh I don’t wanna uh, assume nothin’ but uh—“ he stammered out when she leaned back briefly, only to shut directly up when he realized she was taking off her shirt and dropping it off to one side, moving back in to kiss at the place below his chin. “Uhhh but y’know uh I wanted to—to ask, uh, can I—?”

Sniper took hold of his hands where they were lying tangled against the sheets and placed them at her now-bare waist, settling back up to kiss him again, a hand carding into his hair.

“Uh yeah okay,” he mumbled against her lips, and tentatively at first his hands wandered, one sliding up her lower back and feeling out the ridges of her spine and the other hesitating around near her ribcage.

Hesitation, trying to just deal with how wildly unexpectedly good she was at kissing when it got down to it, before his hand trailed up farther, farther.

A pause just as his fingertips reached the edge of her bra. He managed to untangle enough to get a breath in, inhaling to ask a question. “Uh so is it okay if I—?” he started to stammer, then she caught hold of his chin, tilting it up to face her. She had an eyebrow raised at him, expression firm.

“Scout,” she deadpanned, and he shut up. “If you start doing something I don’t like, I’ll bloody well tell you. Unclench, mate. I can handle myself. Stop babying me.”

He gulped, nodded, and reached up to cup at one breast firmly.

“Bloody finally,” she sighed, and sank back in to start kissing a line up his neck.

He felt overheated again, cupping and squeezing and just feeling out her torso, namely what was hidden under firm fabric, fixated and aroused. It wasn’t until his fingers slipped on the cup and he pinched just over where he figured a nipple was that he managed to wring a noise out of her, a soft sound in the back of her throat, and it made his whole body thrum. God. Fuck. God. And she tolerated him playing around for quite a while—patience and all—before getting impatient and tugging his hand around to her back, and seemed pleased that he knew how to handle a bra hook without fumbling. And then he got that burst of confidence, and he was using the arm around her waist to haul her up a bit so he could throw his mouth into the mix.

He talked a pretty big game, he knew that. And he also knew that he did exaggerate a little bit about stuff sometimes. Or a lot. Or made things up.

But he really did actually know what he was doing in bed, honest, even if he usually ended up fucking things up outside of the bedroom often enough to ruin it for himself before he even got there.

All he knew was that Sniper seemed to be caught off guard by both the enthusiasm and his ability to figure out how exactly he could make her feel good, where to kiss and where to suck and overall what he needed to do to get more little noises out of her.

He had his free hand a solid distance down the front of her slacks, sliding with purpose against the front of her underwear and idly admiring the heat of her through the fabric before his brain caught up with him, and then he was pulling back a little. “I, uh, I don’t have—uh anything to uh—“

She hummed, lifting his chin and planting a kiss to the corner of his mouth before leaning over to try to fish through a drawer without needing to untangle from him. Impatience took hold of him fast, made his mouth wander across the expanse of her neck, made her fumble and swear and take just a few extra seconds to pull out a strip of foil squares, tearing one off and dropping it on his chest.

By the time he managed to fumble open the wrapper she’d stripped her slacks off and settled back into place straddling his hips, and he choked on air briefly when she settled back further, weight and heat against where his pants had gotten very tight very fast. She had that quirk to her mouth again. His head was spinning. He reached down to pop the button of his pants, pretty sure he was like, going to die otherwise.

And then condom-kitted fingers were teasing at her, and he watched the way his playing and exploration made her face draw up tight, the way breath puffed out of her unevenly, watched her thighs tremble when his thumb drew soft circles just against the nub hidden just a bit further up between soft folds and fuzz and—

She groaned a plead under her breath just before she teetered over the edge, and it made his hips buck involuntarily, which rocked her and sent her back down much harder than before, and she cried out, thighs going tense, and he felt like he’d touched a live wire watching her jolt through it and back down again, jittery and desperate to move but just barely holding himself back.

She panted hard on the way back down, and some of her hair was sticking to her face with sweat, and she blinked down at him after a second, and her eyebrows furrowed after a few moments.

“...Are you holding your breath?” she asked, eyes narrowing, visibly puzzled.

He exhaled and inhaled and the second he had air back in his system his mouth was running a mile a minute. “Yeah sorry I just y’know I was kinda worried I was gonna start just kinda yakkin’ away there and I didn’t wanna like fuck up my concentration or like throw you off or nothin’ because I kinda do that sometimes and it sucks so I really try my best not to fuck it up like that anymore y’know because uh—“

She rolled her eyes lightly at his shenanigans, moving to stretch briefly, taking a deep, satisfied breath.

“—because y’know heat of the moment stuff I kinda end up just goin’ on and on and on about shit and I don’t just mean in like a dirty talk kinda way even though it’s also that too I just mostly mean like in a sorta just rambling about like—

She reached back over to the strip of foil squares, snapping one off and shifting a short ways further down the bed—not that there was much room, but she managed.

“—like just kinda how gorgeous y—people—uh, girls, I meant girls—!”

She raised an eyebrow at him, but otherwise let him keep babbling, just pulling his pants and briefs a short way down his legs and ripping open the foil square with the help of her teeth.

“—uh y’know just how fuckin’ good-lookin’ girls will be because like holy shit y’know? And it’s just like y’know I’ve gotten like compLAINTS—“

His voice rose up into a yip for a moment as she rolled the condom on in a swift motion and squeezed on the upstroke, and he swallowed hard to get his voice back to slightly less shaky, needing to glance away, face flushing at the way the noise had made Sniper grin.

“—uh like about me talkin’ way too much so I figured just better safe than sorry and I’ll just shut up to begin with unless I’m like makin’ sure everything is totally kosher but also you told me to shut up about that too and I didn’t w-w-woah, hah—“

He trailed off with a wheeze followed closely by a very embarrasing squeak as she started to sink down, and he promptly clamped a hand up over his mouth to prevent further noises and found that an added benefit his own shutting the hell up meant he could hear the way she hummed, her shaky breath, the soft sound that rose up in the back of her throat when she’d finally settled.

She finally took a short breath, hummed again, and looked down at him. Her face was flushed down to her collarbones, and her freckles faded into that flush, and she had that quirk to her mouth again. She took hold of his wrists, pulling his hand away from his mouth and where it tangled in the sheets, and instead set it against her chest, the other to her waist. “None’a that,” she murmured, and he nodded quickly, and then she shifted her legs, settled her weight, and started to move.

It took all Scout had just to keep his hands from shaking as he stroked at her skin in rhythm with her movement, watching her move with appreciative, hungry, slightly-awed eyes. His thumb rubbed circles around one nipple, and it made his breath catch seeing the way she bit her lip to keep quiet, the way her eyelids fell that much further, feeling her internal muscles fluttering.

“Fuckin’ gorgeous,” he breathed, honestly and enthusiastically, and she looked up at him, and the quirk of her lip seemed almost sheepish and so he continued. “So fuckin’ gorgeous, look at you. You’re fuckin’ beautiful.”

Her lip quirked that much further. “No need for the flattery, there,” she breathed back, voice similarly low. “You’ve already in bed with me.”

“Ain’t flattery if it’s true,” he shot back, and squeezed at her breast and made her jolt into a harder motion for a moment. “I’m serious, look at you! I’d sit here and watch this all day if I was allowed, you’re like every painting and sculpture and drawing all rolled up into one, and even then you’re better because those can’t drink me under the goddamn table.”

She huffed a laugh, thrown off her rhythm and falling still for a moment as she grinned down at him as if not entirely sure what to do with him.

“I’m not jokin’!” he insisted, and he was smiling too, even as his breath returned to him. “If I could just sit around with a view like this all the time, it’d totally ruin me. I’d probably sit there until I starved to death and then the last thing I’d ever do was thank you for the fuckin’ privilege.”

“You’re a sap, Scout,” she said, clearly going for a tone of vague disapproval, but she couldn’t quite wipe the smile off of her face.

“Guilty,” he shrugged, and was only a little surprised when she suddenly leaned down to kiss him, and he smoothed hands up her back to hold her there for just a few seconds longer when he thought she was about to pull back away.

“Well,” she murmured, half against his lips, and then sat back up and steadied herself, rolled her shoulders. “Bit refreshing to hear sweet rather than just filth, but either works for me, yeah?”

And she didn’t exactly give him a chance to respond before she was back in motion, so he just nodded again, head falling back briefly.

“God, you feel good,” was all he managed at first, drawing the nail of each thumb down her sides like seams. When that went pretty well, he continued down the outside of her thighs, then back up the inside starting at her knees. “All hot and—and slick—fuck—“

He took hold of her hips and helped support her weight, started rolling his hips along with her rhythm in increasing force until her breath caught alongside every thrust.

“That good, huh?” Sniper asked, and she was grinning again.

“So fuckin’ good,” he agreed, voice dropped, trying hard to keep his head on straight but finding it increasingly difficult.

The room felt sweltering, and the heat alone was making everything spin. That, combined with the heat and weight of another body on top of him—

“Fuck,” he swore again from behind clenched teeth, rhythm faltering as suddenly he felt just a little too close for a moment, and she echoed the sentiment, reaching a hand down between her own thighs, eyebrows all screwed together and thighs trembling. “Wait—“

He brushed her hand aside and found her clit within a moment, rubbing firm circles against her and feeling like the king of the fuckin’ world at the way that made her cry out, rhythm ticking up in speed.

“C’mon,” he urged, and she panted, choked on a moan, and that was it for her, making a series of bitten off noises.

He clenched his teeth and tightened the muscle in his thighs and held on and held on, and only once she was back to limp and out of breath did he slide out and tug himself over the edge. He would’ve been embarrassed about how loud he was as he finished, but it was soothed pretty quickly by the way Sniper settled forward to lay against his side, pressing a brief kiss to his temple and another just below his ear.

“Holy shit,” he breathed in a very unsteady voice, and managed to get his arms to move to lie more comfortably, an arm over her waist. “You’re fuckin’ incredible.”

“Not bad yourself,” Sniper murmured, voice a hum, sounding much more relaxed and much less grumpy than usual.

“Again soon?” he managed, tilting his head towards her.

A hum of affirmation, a pause. “You’re sleeping here, by the way,” she informed him, squeezing with the arm around his chest.

“Hell yeah,” he murmured. “Uh. I wake up kinda early, just so you know.”

She hummed again. “You gonna do the whole nine yards, cook breakfast and all that nonsense?” she mumbled in a deadpan.

“Well usually it’s ‘cuz I go for a run in the morning,” he explained, “but sure, if you want. Got plenty of exercise already, huh?”

A light smack to his flank only made him giggle more, and he felt her shaking her head at him. “Hooligan,” she chided like a term of endearment, and that was when he became certain that he hadn’t fucked everything up.

Well, yet, but he figured if he made it this far, maybe he really did stand a chance.

[sheerfreesia007]

Fallin’ All In You (Pt. 62)

Title: Fallin’ All In You (Pt. 62)

Pairing: Agent Whiskey x Reader

Author: @sheerfreesia007​

Words: 3,203

Warnings: Fluff, Best friends bonding, Cursing, Sisters bonding

Tags: @synystersilenceinblacknwhite​, @two-unbeatable-beaters​, @randomness501​, @sevvysaurus​, @paryl​, @talesfromtheguild​, @secretsihideinside​, @agingerindenial​, @mrschiltoncat​

Permanent Tag List: @paintballkid711​, @fioccodineveautunnale​, @phoenixhalliwell​

Author Notes: This was fun to right and more action packed than other chapters. Also I loved writing more for Charlotte and Rachel they’re the best girlfriends/sisters ever. Feedback is always welcome and appreciated! Thanks for reading! Hope you enjoy!

Gif Credit: Google

         You sat in the back seat of the town car with Tequila as it drove through the city streets. You leaned back in your seat and huffed softly, you couldn’t see a thing thanks to the blindfold that Tequila had demanded you put on in your apartment much to Jack’s amusement. Tequila had said that since you knew New York better than him now that he couldn’t chance you possibly knowing where he was taking you for your bachelorette party. So you had to don the blindfold.

         Jack had grinned brightly at you right before you put the blindfold over your eyes. He had even helped tie it around your head so that you couldn’t see anything. And just as he had finished tying it he had leant down to whisper in your ear.

         “Save the blindfold, maybe we’ll use you once you get back.” came his sultry whisper in your ear making you shiver with anticipation.

         “Alright! ‘Nough of that, save it for tonight.” Tequila called out and you grinned widely as your hand shot out to search for Jack’s. Which he gripped yours softly and pulled your hand up to his mouth to press a sweet kiss to your hand.

         “I’ll see you tonight when you get home. I love you.” Jack husked against your skin and you smiled brightly.

         “Love you too. See you later.” you responded before Tequila’s arm wrapped around your shoulders and guided you gently out of the apartment. 

         And now the two of you were sitting in the back of the town car silently as you tried not to fidget in your seat. You had tried to figure out which direction the car was traveling but that was foolish as since you didn’t have a starting point to use. Turning in your seat you face Tequila and smile softly trying to make yourself seem innocent.

         “Don’t even try it Cur.” Tequila says in the quiet space between you and you huff softly that makes him chuckle softly at you. “C’mon Cur, I did all this planning for today. I don’t want to spoil it for you and I wanna see surprise when you realize where we’re going.” You instantly feel guilty for wanting to find out what he had planned. Nodding your head you turn and sit back in your seat.

         “Alright.” you say softly and smile knowing that Tequila took pride in this and that whatever he had planned would be wonderful.

         “Thank you. So as it gets closer and closer are you nervous for the wedding? It’s only two weeks away.” Tequila asks warmly and you can hear the smile in his voice.

         “No, not nervous. More anxious to get it done already. I wanna be able to call him my husband already.” you respond softly and smile softly at the thought of being able to call Jack your husband finally.

         “Yeah I bet Cur. It’s been forever since you two started on this journey huh?” Tequila asked teasingly and you scoffed, shaking your head at him.

         “Just three years, Tequila. Forever is what we’re promising each other.” you said softly and grinned widely at your words.

         “Yur such a sap.” Tequila said chuckling softly at you. Huffing softly you shook your head as a small smile grazed over your lips. You sat back in your seat some more letting the motion of the car start to lull you into a sense of calm.

         It wasn’t long before you felt the car coming to stop and you sat up straighter against the seat. It truly hadn’t been that long of a car ride to get to your destination so you were quite curious to see where he had decided to take you. You heard the car door on Tequila’s side open and the sounds of busy New York filtered into the quiet car. 

         “How is she not screamin’ with excitement right now?!” called a familiar voice and you furrowed your eyebrows at that. That sounded like Charlotte.

         “She’s blindfolded you ninny. I didn’t want her figuring it out before we got here.” Tequila snipped out and you couldn’t hide your ever growing grin. Just then there was hurried movement in front of you and you felt the seat cushion dip.

         “Hey there darlin’. I’m gonna help ya out of the car now ok?” came another familiar soft voice and you smiled as you realized that it was Rachel. Soft hands held yours as you scooted across the seat towards the door. “Alright now swing your legs out.” Rachel instructed and you did as she said letting your feet come to rest on the pavement.

         “There she is!” came Charlotte’s happy voice from in front of you and you smiled in the direction the voice came from before you stood tall on your feet. “Alright take a step up and let Tequila take that dang blindfold off.” Charlotte cheered excitedly.

         You could feel Tequila’s hands untying the knot at the back of your head and your hands easily came up to catch the blindfold. Your eyes blinked rapidly as sunlight pierced them and you slowly let your vision clear before spotting Charlotte and Rachel standing in front of you with wide happy grins. Then you spotted the building behind them and felt your eyes widen. Spinning around you looked at Tequila with uncontained delight.

         “Area 51?!” you cheered excited and saw his wide happy grin. “Oh Tequila! Man after my own heart!” you squealed and flung yourself at him. He laughed loudly as he held you close in a tight hug.

         “Nuttin’ but the best for the best.” he retorted as he hugged you close to him. 

         “C’mon Future Mrs. Daniels. Let’s get our laser tag on!” Called Charlotte and you laughed brightly before turning back to the two women in front of you.

           Your group of four had been joined up with a larger group of eight and then two teams of six had been split up for the laser tag games. Charlotte and Rachel had been placed on the opposing team while you and Tequila were on the same team. Tequila crouched down behind some wooden pallets next to you and grinned wickedly as you peered around the cover to spot where Charlotte and Rachel were hiding.

         “Your knee doing alright?” Tequila asked lowly as he peaked over the top of the pallets.

         “Yeah it’s starting to cramp up on me a little, getting achy. I think this is gonna’ be my last game.” you responded slightly breathless with excitement. Tequila nodded to you as you both surveyed the battlefield from your vantage points. Just then you spotted Rachel’s head of hair bobbing from behind a pillar to your left. You tapped Tequila’s arm and nodded your head at where you could still a little bit of Rachel’s blue jeans peeking out from behind the pillar. Tequila silently nodded to you and began to aim his laser tag gun in that direction before you started moving along the floor still keeping in a crouch so that you could sneak up on Rachel. 

         Once you got down behind a group of barrels you quickly set your sights on Rachel who was peering around the pillar on the other side not seeing you at all. Raising your gun you quickly shot off two shots and heard her vest making a buzzer sound and her loud groaning as she whipped her head around and spotted you hiding behind the barrels.

         “Dang it! Stop shooting me!” she snipped out and you laughed brightly before moving back to where Tequila was hiding.

         “Have you seen Charlotte?” you ask him and he nods grinning while he trains his gun over to his right. You peer over his shoulder and see Charlotte manically laughing as she shoots someone from your team in the back. You both watch as she hoots and hollers as she runs about the room shooting as many people as she possibly can and yet never being taken out by one of your teammates.

         “Are you sure you wanna marry into this family?” Tequila asks teasingly and you laugh softly as you train your gun on Charlotte as well. The timer on the clock is running down and you shut one of your eyes as you watch Charlotte spin in a circle crowing at the player she just shot. Letting out a soft slow breath you pull the trigger on your gun and the buzzer on Charlotte’s vest goes off not even five seconds before the clock buzzer goes off signalling the end of the game. You and Tequila jump up with loud cheers and hollers as Charlotte whirls around to you guys with a scowl on her face.

         “What the hell you guys?!” Charlotte calls outraged as she throws her arms up in the air and you laugh smiling widely at her. You raise your gun and blow across the barrel making her laugh brightly. “My brother’s marrying a modern day Annie Oakley ain’t he?” she quips and you grin even wider.

         “Hell yeah he is!” Tequila shouts as all four of your group come together. You grimace softly when your knee twinges and Tequila catches it easily. “C’mon ladies let’s go get Cur’s cane and then we’ll head out.” he says warmly wrapping an arm around your shoulders. You grin as you settle into his side letting him lead you out of the arena.

         “Man I can’t wait to tell Jack that you were the sharp shooter of both games.” Charlotte says proudly and you smile over at her. Walking over to the counter you quickly undo your vest and hand it along with your gun. Tequila sidles up next to you and hands you your cane which you take gratefully.

         “Thanks Tequila.” you thank him with a smile.

         “So Rachel and I are gonna have to head on back to the hotel. I've got some meetings I need to handle for the family business and she’s got some work she has to finish up. But I’m so glad that we got to spend the day with you and celebrate you before you walk down the aisle.” CHarlotte explains as she gives you a tight warm hug that you return eagerly.

         “Yeah I’ve some business proposals I have to go over so we’re both gonna go try to be adults now. But thank you for having us this was so much fun!” Rachel says with a wry grin. You laugh and hug her tightly as well.

         “Thanks for coming, guys. This was a blast and I’m glad we got to do it.” you say feeling the adrenaline still coursing through you.

         “Thanks for coming ladies. Maybe next time we can get the whole Daniels clan in on this.” Tequila suggests with a wide smile.

         “Oh no, you don’t wanna do that.” Charlotte begins to say as she shakes her head vehemently.

         “Yeah we’re all competitive and will gladly take out family members to win.” Rachel deadpans and both you and Tequila stare at her with wide eyes before her and Charlotte crack up.

         As you all walk out of the building you see the two seperate town cars waiting for you all. You smile and hug both Rachel and Charlotte again before they hug Tequila and climb into their car. You wave as the car drives away before climbing into the car that’s waiting for you and Tequila.

         “So I’ve still more plans for us if you’re up for it.” Tequila says unsurely and you look over at him with an adoring smile on your face.

         “More?” you ask softly as you gesture back to the laser tag building. “More than that?”

         “Well the next appointment is much slower and way more relaxing.” Tequila teases softly as the car begins to drive away.

         “Lead the way Tequila.” you say trustingly and he grins over at you.

           “We’re going to the spa??” you ask as you bounce in your seat as the car pulls up to The Spa at Mandarin Oriental. “Oh Tequila you’ve out done yourself!” you squeal excitedly and Tequila barks out a laugh.

         “Fair warning I booked a couples massage package but if you’re uncomfortable with that I can always rearrange it.” he warns you and you shake your head with a side frown.

         “Nonsense. We’ll be able to talk and hang out more this way.” you say easily with a wave of your hand. Tequila scoffs and shakes his head at you before climbing out of the car.

           You’re laying face down on the massage table and your body is just melting under the hands of the masseuse. It’s been awhile since you’ve gotten a full body massage and this is just relaxing every tight knot in your muscles until they are jelly. You huff out softly as firm fingers dig into a knot on your left shoulder and you shiver before melting as the knot releases it’s tension under the pressure.

         “How ya doin’ over there Cur?” Tequila asks from your right and you hum softly before hearing his chuckle. “You kinda need to answer with words Cur.” Tequila teases.

         “Brain broke, head empty.” you quip back at him and he laughs loudly at your words.

         “That good huh?” he asks before he hisses. Your head turns to the side to see Tequila’s masseuse digging her knuckles deeply into his calf muscles as he squeezes his eyes shut tightly.

“Just like that huh?” you retort back at him with a soft lazy smirk. He grunts lowly and you laugh. “This is amazing Tequila.” you say truthfully and his eyes open to stare at you with an affectionate smile directed at you. “I mean really. Today has been wonderful and I’m so grateful for it.” 

“Anything for you Cur. You deserve it.” he responds before reaching his arm out with his fist clenched. You laugh brightly as tears pool in your eyes at the bond you two have before you reach out a tap your own fist against his.

 The two of you had moved to the sauna where you both sat splayed out on the wooden benches as steam rose around you. You leaned your head back and shut your eyes slowly relishing in the heated room. Tequila sighed softly next to you as he sat there with his own eyes shut.

“I’m gonna miss this.” Tequila says almost morosely and you turn your head to look at him with a raised eyebrow.

“The bomb massage or the sauna?” you ask teasingly and he chuckles softly as he shakes his head at you.

“Spending time with you, idiot.” he quips back and you still for a second before your eyebrows furrow. 

“What are you talking about?” you ask with concern lacing your voice.

“It’s going to be different cuz you’re getting married. You’re also here in New York. It’s just going to be different.” he tried to explain. You sat up and turned your body on an angle to face him more.

“No it’s not.” you said firmly and determined. Tequila snaps his head over to you and you scowl at him slightly. “I’ve been living in New York for months now. And we’ve managed to work around that just fine. You visit her or I visit there. And we video call at least once a week sometimes more when you’re not on mission.” you say fiercely and watch as Tequila’s eyes soften at your words. “Just because I’m getting married doesn’t mean that I let you fall to the wayside. That’s not how this works and if you think that than you’re in for a rude awakening, you stupid man.”

“I love you Cur.” Tequila rushes out suddenly and your eyes snap up to his from the floor that you had been glaring at.

“I love you too Tequila and if you ever imply that I’d give you up I’m gonna deck you.” you threaten him and he grins widely at you.

“Deal. Now c’mon there’s these things called facials that are next on the list and I’m intrigued.” he says easily and you burst out in astonished laughter at his stupidity.

 “Alright so Whiskey went ahead and sent over a change of clothes for us for dinner.” Tequila explained as he handed you a black dress bag as you both stood outside the changing rooms. You smiled and shook your head slightly. “He’ll be joining us for dinner too but he’s gonna meet us there.”

“Sounds good. Any hints on where we’re going?” you asked hopefully and dropped your shoulders when you saw the shrewd look Tequila shot at you. “Fine, I’ll stop asking for hints and clues.” you huff out before walking into the dressing room.

The dress was gorgeous, a deep maroon color that had a lace overlay over the complete dress. With ¾ sleeves that came to rest at the bend of your elbows and a v-neckline that highlighted the glow your skin had obtained from the spa treatments, you looked and felt stunning. Slipping your feet into the black strappy kitten heels you felt bad ass.

“There she is!” Tequila called out as you stepped out into the main area of the Spa. He was dressed up in a pair of dark denim jeans and a charcoal gray button up shirt and his familiar tan Stetson. “You look beautiful.” he says kindly and you smile warmly up at him.

“Not so bad yourself!” you say and watch as a blush dusts his cheeks. You let him lead you out of the building and straight into the car waiting for you. The ride to the restaurant isn’t long but traffic holds you up a little bit as the hour reaches evening. You silently sit back in your seat and watch the city lights flash across your window. The sounds of New York life are soothing to you as you travel in the car with Tequila.

When the car pulls to the curb you look over and see that you have arrived at Wolfgang’s Steakhouse, which was a favorite of yours, Tequila’s and Jack’s. Smiling with delight you watch as Tequila exits the car and then you scoot over it to slide out behind him. When a hand comes into view you look up surprised and the grin that splits your face is almost blinding. Jack is standing in front of you in black button up shirt and gray vest with blue jeans as he holds his hand out for you. Taking his hand he helps you out of the car and onto the sidewalk before he shuts the car door.

“I miss you darlin’.” he whispers against your temple before pressing a quick kiss there.

“I missed you too.” you respond warmly and wrap your arm around his before walking into the restaurant. Tequila’s at the door holding it open for the two of you with a soft smirk. “What?” you ask him curiously.

“Nothing you two just look good together.” Tequila responds.

“Good, at least the wedding photos will turn out decent.” Whiskey gripes next to you and both you and Tequila burst out into happy laughter as the three of you head into dinner.

[allegra-writes]

Lab Partners

Peter Parker x Stark! Reader

General audiences

Warnings: None

The request:

Hi! Could I have some Peter+stark!reader before infinity war or au where the snap didn't happen and Midtown goes to Stark Industries on a field trip and no one believes Peter works there but reader and Tony prove them wrong? Thank you!

MY MASTERLIST

"Dude, finally!" Peter's voice welcomed you as soon as you entered the lab.

"Ugh, don't even start with me" you placed the red bull can in front of him, hopping on the table next to it. "The machine outside is broken, so I had to go all the way to the third floor cafeteria to get these"

"The machine is broken?" He took the can from your hands and cracked it open for you before even opening his own. He was a gentleman like that, and you would be lying if you said it didn't make your heart melt for him just a little bit more. You guys had been on the lab pretty much all night and, while you were sure this morning you looked like the dead warmed over, his messy hair, slightly red eyes and puffy lips made him look somehow even more endearing. They made him look hotter.

"I know, right?" You cleared your throat as if that would cover your shameless staring, "this building is literally crawling with engineers and the freaking soda machine is broken!"

"Well, to be fair only like a handful of people has access to this floor of the building. And only one of those is an actual engineer" Peter pointed out sensibly, "Still, we should probably check it out once we're done here. I mean, we can't have the Stark princess mixing up with all the peasants at the cafeteria" He added cheekily, using the press's nickname for you to tease you. You punched him in the arm, causing him to start laughing.

"Shut up!" He laughed even harder. "Actually, something funny happened on the way to the third floor..."

"Really, now?" He was still smiling. Your heart was still doing somersaults inside your ribcage.

"Really really. You see, there was a bunch of kids our age there. Some of them were wearing Midtown high hoodies. Something you wanna tell me, Pete?"

That sobered him up. You sounded so much like your father right there, he just couldn't lie to you when you used that tone. He wondered vaguely if you were aware of that and did it on purpose, or you simply were so... well, Stark.

"Well? Is there?" You pressed on. Peter sighed.

"Yeah, my school had this field trip today... Mr. Harrington figured that, since I work here almost every day, it would be boring for me so I didn't need to go" He shrugged.

"That much I can understand" you nodded, "but don't you want to, I don't know... Pop down there to say hi or something?"

Peter hesitated.

"No, not really. I mean, Ned already knows what we truly do, and the rest of them don't even believe I'm an intern here anyway" he tried to sound nonchalant about it but you knew him too well to buy the act.

To be honest, he didn't want you to see the way Flash treated him and realize how not cool and lame he actually was. It would be awesome to prove Flash wrong, but risking you hearing him call Peter "Penis Parker" just wasn't worth it.

"What do you mean? Why would they not believe you?" You insisted innocently. He scratched the back of his neck and for the first time you noticed he was actually blushing.

When he finally met your eyes, he realized immediately what a mistake that was. He was just going to have to tell the truth. Damn you and your big, beautiful, soulful orbs.

"There's this guy... He's a jerk and he doesn't like me. I guess he kinda convinced everybody that I was lying." Your shocked face was doing something to his insides. You were so nice to everyone that it truly surprised you some people were just mean, and he was so screwed already, but that made him love you even more. Liz Allen had nothing on your beauty or your intelligence, and definitely had nothing on your kindness.

He was so amazed by this revelation he didn't even notice when Bruce entered the lab, commenting distractedly "Did you guys know the soda machine out there is broken?"

Nor did he notice when you took your phone out. It was time to send your father a message.

**********************************************

"... I told you guys, Penis Parker was lying all this time" A douchy kid gloated as they left the interns lab. That must be Flash. "If he really worked here, he should have been there"

"Peter works directly for Tony Stark" Ned defended his friend. "He's probably with him right now, that's why he wasn't with the other interns."

"Yeah, right! And he probably hangs out with y/n Stark on his free time!" Flash replied, voice full of sarcasm. Wow, Parker really didn't do this brat's level of jerkness justice. "Mr. Harrington, you're gonna fail him, right?"

The teacher in question stared at some papers on his hands, shuffling nervously.

"Well... You see...He's-"

Woah there, he couldn't let that happen, could he? It was showtime.

"Good, you're still here." Tony Stark's voice resonated through the hallway. Thirty or so shocked faces turned his way. A couple of them, including the douchebag's, even stared open mouthed.

"Mr- Mr. Stark, it's so good to see you"

"Thank you, Amanda" Tony interrupted the pretty blonde talking. "I'll take care of the tour from now on. I have a special treat for you guys" He added to the shellshocked group. " You see, my favorite intern is always talking about you and how smart you are" He leveled Flash with a look "well, most of you anyway. So I thought I would let you see where the truly cool stuff happens, so what do you say guys, wanna take a peak at one of my personal labs?"

Everyone was still too starstruck to answer, so he turned to an unimpressed looking girl.

"What do you say Joan of Arc, game for some real science?"

"As long as we can discuss your plans for remunerating the families of the workers that were forced to work under slavery conditions on foreign countries during your father's time directing Stark industries, sure. Name's Michelle Jones, by the way."

Tony blinked.

"Well MJ, I guess it's a good thing it's a long elevator ride up there, then..."

**********************************************

"... How did you even find out about those plans?"

"Oh, I didn't." The intimidating teenager admitted, "I was just trying to make you uncomfortable."

"Well, you did," it was Tony's turn to admit. "For a minute there, I thought the whole thing had leaked and the press was gonna caught wind of it"

"Why don't you want the press finding out about it?"

Tony shrugged. "It shouldn't be news to be a decent human. Besides, they like to twist everything, the press would say I just do it for the PR"

"Yeah, that's probably true... Hey, is that Parker?"

Tony followed her look to where his protegee and his daughter were doing what appeared to be some silly victory dance and... Singing?

"... Congratulations, work so hard forgot how to vacation, they ain't never had the dedication..."

"..Nanana nana and look we made it, yeah we made it!.."

"Nice to see you guys working so hard." Tony called out to them "Banner are you dancing too?"

"Tony! I can't help it, you should see what your kids came up with, this is game changing!" Bruce exclaimed excitedly just as the rest of the students entered the enormous lab. He frowned. "Tony, what the hell? This is a high security lab, this is no place for high schoolers"

That finally got Peter's attention and he stopped spinning you in his arms, staring slack jawed at his classmates, still huddled together by the glass double doors, as surprised to see him there as he was of seeing them.

"Relax Banner, don't go green on us. I just wanted to show the kiddies here where their friend works. Y/n, Parker, what do you have for me?"

You smiled mischievously at Peter before stepping away from his arms and practically skipping to your father's side.

"Dad, you have to see the new formula Peter developed for Spider-Man's web shooters." You gushed at your dad. "And... The other thing... I can't really talk about it in front of civilians" You added eyeing Ned significantly.

Ned's face lit up. "Is this about the creepy crawlers you and Pete were talking about last night?" Tony looked alarmed so he hurried to add, "About the ones I know nothing about, whatsoever"

Tony still looked suspicious but Peter choose that moment to come stand beside you.

"Hi, guys!" He said timidly to his classmates, and for once, Flash was speechless, no scantling remarks coming to his mind. In fact, his brain seemed to broke completely when his eyes came to rest on yours and Peter's intertwined fingers.

"Peter you work in Mr. Stark's private labs? That's... Very impressive. Well done! I'm tempted to just pass you this semester with an A plus right here and now" Mr. Harrington said, looking genuinely happy for him. Your smile grew bigger.

"That seems a little exaggerated" Your father intervened, placing a hand on the teachers shoulder, "Why don't we talk about you just giving Peter cero homework or assignments so he can spend more time here with me instead?"

Mr. Harrington laughed nervously. Your just father raised an eyebrow. "Why are you laughing, I wasn't kidding"

"Dad, I'd hate to be a joykiller but Bruce, Peter and I need to get back to work."

Your dad looked at you, then at the kids.

"Yeah, sure, we'll just leave you guys to it, then" He started ushering the students outside but then turned back to you, saying for everyone to hear "Why don't we get dinner later, though, all four of us? Oh, and I like this one here" he pointed at MJ "Can we invite her?"

"Sure!"

"Of course, Mr. Stark!"

He pointed at Ned "You are not invited. Oh, who am I kidding, of course you are invited. You are the man in the chair after all..."

Bruce, Peter and you watched them retreat back to the elevators.

"Don't think I don't know what you just did" Peter turned to you as soon as they were out of sight. You looked at him innocently.

"I have no idea what you're talking about"

"If you excuse me" Bruce declared "I still have work to do. Go do whatever it is you love birds do on your free time, you worked hard enough today. And last night."

You both opened your eyes big at that, you had thought you hadn't raised any alarms when you broke into the lab after patrol, when you had thought of the spider shaped spy droids for the avengers.

"We have no idea what you're talking about" you said at the same time.

And then,

"Wait, we're not love birds!"

"I really don't know what you're talking about this time!"

The end.

Wow! My first request is done! I hope you liked it, anonymous who send it. Whoever you are, I loved writing this one, so thank YOU!

[ohwereusingourmadeupnames]

starker= >“ you are a person, and i see you. ”“ all i had was you! ”

do the thing - send in all the prompts.

Thanks for this one, nonnie! It’s about 2k in length, hope you enjoy :]

Peter remembered the first time Tony called him “kid”. At the time, he actually was – a bright eyed 15-year-old that didn’t understand the game he played and the part he would eventually take in the ultimate showdown. He looked up to Tony Stark and when the reality of him was even better – well, there wasn’t any changing the way he felt. Despite that, it still hurt – the one person he wanted to be seen by looked at him like he was still in kindergarten, playing with blocks instead of playing with life or death situations. 

The initial shift of something more between them happened right after the dusting. Peter and Tony were amongst the few still left in the group and It became pretty clear after Thanos destroyed the stones that sticking together was the only option. Tony took him under his wing after that, the older man showed him the ropes of the lab – his eyes flashing every time Peter understood or spoke about the thing Tony went to talk about before the man got started. Little by little, Peter thought they were making progress. 

And then Steve Rogers came back into the picture, bringing about the idea that the stones could be saved – that if they were just right in their time travel, they could hit the reset button and recreate reality the way it should have been. Tony’s eyes were vacant the entire time – Peter understanding now that he was thinking, that thoughts were flitting through his head so quickly that paying attention took away from that. Peter figured he would have the answer within the next few hours – if it even took him that long. 

Later in the lab, Peter was proven right when he heard Tony whoop – the large exhale of breath something he could only remember hearing a time or two before that moment. Turning at his own workspace, Peter caught Tony’s eyes. There were so many emotions raging within them – fear, excitement, uncertainty – hope. Lips suddenly dry, Peter slipped his tongue out to wet them, the feeling of anticipation so evident, he could taste it in the air. 

“You did it, then?” Peter asked, his voice soft – the thought of what this could mean to everyone something he tried not to imagine, something he didn’t want to give himself hope for. Bringing everyone back would mean so many things for him – so many things for the rest of the world. 

Tony rotated the 3D graphic on the screen, his eyes flitting from left to right to take everything in, to check and double check and check again. Peter got up from his chair and walked over to get a better look at the man and the plans before him. “I did it, Pete. Holy shit – I did it,” Tony mumbled, one of his arms wrapping tightly around Peter’s shoulder as he spoke. The excitement was tangible, Peter could feel it thrumming through Tony’s veins, their point of contact electric from it all. 

Allowing himself to absorb all of the energy between them, Peter leaned into the touch – his eyes shutting for a moment. This was big, this was so big that the next few weeks would be pivotal to the fate of the rest of the population – hell, to the fate of the world. In the seconds that Tony kept up the embrace, Peter felt the time stop, the immensity of the situation dull, and the feeling of affection for the older man swell – even if just for that singular moment. 

The contact broke after another few heartbeats – each one harder than the last. Tony pulled his arm back to once against swipe at the graphic, a small grin slipping across his lips with each subsequent time he did it. “So, what now, then?” Peter thought to ask after watching the damn thing spin for the twentieth time. Finding the answer was one thing, actually getting the job done – that was another. 

“What happens now is this – we go back, we grab the stones, we set shit right, and then we go home to a world that is hopefully right where it is actually supposed to be,” Tony admitted, his eyes catching Pete’s. “What happens now is we save the world.” 

Sucking in a gulp of air, Peter felt the immensity of that hit him – his chest tightening a little at the thought. The next thing that came to his mind was the fact that Tony said we. Since coming back from Titan, Peter didn’t feel nearly as far from Tony and the rest of the surviving Avengers – he fought hard and contributed to the mission, regardless of the terrible, terrible outcome they couldn’t stop from happening. That had to mean something, right?

“Does we include me?” Peter questioned, the eye contact between them never ceasing, brown meeting brown in a clash that would never resolve itself (especially when both men, despite not admitting it, didn’t want that old song and dance to ever happen.) 

Tony threw that same arm around him again, his grip tight. “Of course, kid. You’re one of us now.” 

And there it was – that word that made Peter’s skin crawl. They’d been working together side by side for 5 years now – 5 years in which Peter grew and changed, became an adult, and found a way to contribute to whatever Tony asked of him. In all that, he figured the man’s view of him would change – that maybe, just maybe, he could be taken seriously by Tony Stark for the first time ever. 

“Is that really still how you think about me? Like I’m just some kid?” Peter moved out of Tony’s grip, his eyes traitorously starting to well up with tears he couldn’t remember ever letting fall. It made sense for a while – Tony’s feelings towards him. Peter was young when he got involved with everything – he was green and fresh, totally inexperienced when it came to just about everything. 

The time on Titan forced him to grow up and the years of being isolated with the smartest man in the world taught him so many things. Tony had to see that. 

There was silence for a second – the older man obviously thrown off the question. Peter didn’t relent, though; he needed to know the answer, to know that over the years, Tony learned about him and came to appreciate the steps Peter took on a daily basis to be good, to do good – to be worthy. 

“I – no, Pete. Of course not. You are a person, and I see you. You’re a grown man with facial hair, even.” Recognizable fingers reached across the space, Tony touching his left cheek with a reverent sort of smile. “Old habits die hard. You’ve done all of this growing under my nose. I’ve noticed, even if you didn’t think I did. You’re not a kid, Pete. You don’t deserve to have me treat you like one, either.” Peter watched Tony struggle with those last few words – old habits really did die hard. 

Instead of continuing the conversation, Peter turned and threw his arms around Tony’s neck, their bodies drawing close with the movement. “Thanks, Tony,” he mumbled, face fitting into the gap between neck and shoulder.

The process of building the machine didn’t take long with two masterminds and a Peter behind the wheel. The machine was up and running within six weeks and the plan was set – each group had a specific time period to travel to and collect the stones with as little noise as possible. When they all came back looking triumphant, Tony assembled the stones in the already made gauntlet. 

After the snap and the destruction of Avenger’s Tower, Peter found himself swinging into the heat of battle – his eyes moving from one side of the field to the other, brown orbs catching up to Tony every chance he got. 

Helping here and there, Peter’s big part didn’t come in until Thanos touched down and started to taunt them. His quick reflexes and even faster thinking had him swooping in and grabbing the gauntlet right from Thanos’s grip – the entire thing zinging with power from the leftover energy of the stones that were once within it. 

A hand grabbing his shoulder took him out of his triumphant haze, Tony’s eyes were boring into him when he blinked his eyes open and looked around. “What the fuck was that, Pete?” Tony practically yelled in his face. The battle was warring around them, and yet – Tony thought scolding him was necessary. 

“Tony, I got it. We just need to get the stones back and this is all over – I got it,” Peter repeated, his voice desperate, the words pleading in their own right. The idea of Tony reverting back to that stern father figure made his chest tighten – even in the midst of all the death, Peter still dreaded the thought. 

“And you almost got yourself killed. You can’t do that, Pete. There’s too much at stake,” Tony got out, his body turning and flight boosters initiating while the words trailed from his mouth. Thanos’s men were quickly closing in on them.  

“I didn’t get myself killed, Tony. I timed it right. I got the gauntlet – we can finish this!” Peter exclaimed, his voice loud now that he too was moving, his web shooters working on over time. “We can finish this, Tony!” 

“I can’t lose you doing it, Pete.” Tony shouted back. 

Each word hit Peter straight in the chest, his focus slipping for just a second. The hit he took in the process made his ears ring – his vision swimming for a second. He felt warm metal embrace him not long later, the loud thrum of the stabilizer in Tony’s gloved hand recognizable after so much time spent training and working in the other man’s presence. They landed near the base of what used to be Avenger’s Tower, Tony’s eyes ablaze. 

“I’ll sit your ass on the sidelines if you get distracted like that again!” Tony roared, breaking the silence. His voice was stern, the look on his face serious – any façade the older man could usually put on was now gone, the situation calling for rawest of emotions. 

“What did you mean? That you can’t lose me. What does that mean?” Peter asked, his brain still stuck on those words, the length of the sentence repeating in his head over, and over, and over again. 

“We’re going to do this right now? Fuck, Pete – all I had was you! All I have. The past five years would have been something completely different without you and I can’t lose that. I can’t lose you. I can’t, Pete – I can’t.” His face plate came up then, tears in Tony’s eyes. “You’re everything.” 

The battle was the furthest thing from Peter’s mind when he reached out and pulled Tony to him, breath huffing from his chest at the impact of the heavy suit. His lips were on Tony’s in an instant, all of the pent-up want, confusion, and need from the past five years finally culminating in the explosive passion of their beings finally connecting. 

[youarejesting]

BTS365 Prompts.week 28

[Full Masterlist] [Prompt Masterlist] Beta: @jung-hoseok-s-airplane

Please tag me in your work if you use my prompts. I want to see your work. Ever your Jester.

Tell me your birthday and I will tag you on your special day!

═══════ ೋღ ღೋ ═══════

         July 9th - 15th

═══════ ೋღ ღೋ ═══════

Kim Seokjin - Kissing

“Kim Seokjin what do you mean you have never had a first kiss?” You shouted in the middle of the party.

“Shush, what if someone hears you?” You raised an eyebrow as the music was practically deafening and dragged him to an unoccupied bedroom. It was too early for couples to be doing anything naughty just yet. Everyone was only one or two drinks in, so it was easy to find refuge in one of the bedrooms, where you could talk together in peace.

“What do you mean?”

“I mean exactly as I stated, I can’t dance with that girl because what if she wants to kiss, I have never kissed anyone before,” he clearly was overthinking things but you understood his nerves and shivered, remembering how your first kiss was a horrid memory cause you had no clue what you were doing.

“Okay sit down, I think I can teach you?” You pushed him to sit on the edge of the bed because he was taller than you and stepped between his legs so you were closer to him. 

He looked nervous. “Don’t worry, I am nothing more than an acquaintance who speaks to you at parties, we don’t hang out or see each other much so nothing will change. I will just teach you how to kiss so you don’t make a fool out of yourself.”

You took him through the different types of kisses explaining how to tilt his head and how to initiate different levels of the kiss. After explaining certain aspects you showed him with a kiss. Finally, you explained where he could put his hands and something clicked this beautiful specimen was kissing you while holding you in his arms making your heart flutter. 

Min Yoongi - Truth

Min Yoongi never lied, he was blunt and saw no reason to. He watched you though a swindler, you could bluff like the best of them and he knew exactly when you would lie. Of course, he would after watching you work your magic on the passersby out the front of his building. He had no idea you would appear before him asking for his help. You were being blamed for the murder of a young woman and he could tell by your expression you were telling the truth.

Jung Hoseok - Video Games (I want to write this)

You were the best of the best, theû big leagues coming together for the new video game of the century. A breakthrough and something people would kill for. You were given an invitation to participate with nine others, all elite gamers. Unlike a regular virtual reality game, this was a full submersion of the subconscious into the digital realm where your bodies would be semi-paralyzed and brains wired into the system. 

While you couldn’t move physically you were strapped into a machine that moved you the same way as you moved in the game. If you were running you were running on the spot, if you sat danced or anything the machine would simulate this and you had your original limits of flexibility and more. 

It was the first time this was being conducted after years of research and safety testing. The whole game process was said to take at least a year and you would be filmed in the game to show the audience your progress within the game and promote the game style. 

None of you had ever met in person until you were asleep, you all logged in and created your characters.

You met them all one by one but Hoseok caught your eye first. He was an extremely famous strategy game player, ranked number one. You, however, were a master at all types of puzzle games, there was a kid who was a pro at first-person shooters. 

You were going to spend a year together in the game. The only problem was you could feel everything the system tapped into your nerve endings and every artificial breeze every movement was felt. Your vital signs were being monitored so you already had to explain to your team that the spikes in your heart rate were because of Hoseok’s character's tight pants and how he smiled at you.

Kim Namjoon - Math 2.0

“Thank you for coming, she is in her room, I really appreciate this,” your mother’s voice came through the house, to whatever middle-aged tutor she had pulled last minute, “I have the money here please she needs to pass this class otherwise she will have to repeat.”

“No worries Ms. y/l/n,” the voice was kind of deep and raspy. Definitely a smoker probably thirty to forty and aged decently. 

Imagine your surprise when Kim Namjoon the nerdy class president and your nemesis steps into your bedroom talking to your mother. “I will make sure she can pass the class, do not worry ma’am I have been tutoring for a few years now and I have a knack for it.”

Your mother turned to him and you flipped him the middle finger and he smiled back taking your mother’s shoulder and explaining how he planned to have you a model student in a few short weeks. 

His style of teaching was unlike anything you had ever experienced but once you fell in love you looked forward to your tutor sessions. 

Park Jimin - Sugar Cookie (I want to continue this one so bad.)

“Hello welcome to candy land I will be your waiter for this evening can I get you something to drink?”

“Hi, Ms. uh,” A tall man grinned standing and leaning to read the tag on your left breast. “Sugar Cookie, I want you to take this young man here and give him a dance equivalent to this price.” 

“Of course,” you allowed him to offer you a large wad of cash, taking the blushing man's hand. You smiled softly noticing he was very handsome, a real rare gem compared to some customers. “Sweetheart, would you like to come sit with me and we can chat and have some drinks.”

You handed him a drink and headed into the private room sitting beside him, “come sit down, you don’t need to be afraid, I can do anything you ask within these guidelines. No violence, no touching in a sexual nature. You and I have the right to leave if we ever feel unsafe.”

He sat down and you mirrored his posture, “you don’t seem as happy as your friends, is there an Occasion?”

“Yeah I am getting married tomorrow” he sounded sad, his eyes full of despair. 

“Tell me what’s got you sad?”

“I have never met her, it is arranged by our parents.” 

“Well you have some choices,” you smiled standing up, “you live your last night as a single man to the fullest and marry a woman you have never met or you could do everything in your power tonight to prevent the wedding, like fake your own death, or perhaps find someone to marry before tomorrow and then you might be free, I mean your very handsome it should be easy.” 

His eyes lit up and you bit your lip nervous. “Would you marry me?” He said “I could pay and it’s only on paper we don’t have to do anything, we might need pictures though miss um...” he said  gesticulating while trailing off.

“Y/n and I mean I have no plans I can end my shift and sign a document with you.” 

He grabbed your hand and raced to his friends, “change of plans I am getting married tonight let’s go!”

“Hell yeah, let’s go guys Jimin’s gonna marry a stripper!” 

Kim Taehyung - Teddy Bears Picnic

“Hey, little man, what are you doing all the way over here don’t you want to join the picnic with all the other kids?” You asked the Kim boy, he was unique from the other children. Originally from Korea, sometimes it was hard to understand the young child's customs and way of life but you tried your best. He was an adorable little boy who had big round ears which made him look endearing.

“My dad isn’t here yet, he said he would be here?” He said looking out towards the parking lot.

“Theodore is it because you haven’t got a Teddy bear?” You questioned using the boy's English name as it was easier for you. “I have many teddy bears you could borrow, come have some lunch?”

“Teddy!” a voice called and you turned to see a very handsome young man appear.

“Don’t worry, miss this is my bear right here,” the boy grinned up at his dad who scooped him up into a hug.

Jeon Jungkook - Poem

“Poetry slam, Taehyung it’s not my scene?” Jungkook complained for the fifth time but followed his friend with the promise of free pizza. 

“Just be quiet I like poetry, please don’t laugh”

“I will try,” Jungkook sighed, sitting down, he was bored and lost in the dull words from the uninteresting people. 

“Next we have y/n,” the host called and Taehyung clapped enthusiastically. Jungkook sat up hoping this was going to be good. 

She started speaking and painting a picture in his mind with words that felt so romantic, he caught a double meaning to her words and felt his ears and neck turn red at the thought this woman could weave such sultry tales. 

[tksfandomhellhole]

totally didn't just give up on the tumblr app and boot up my laptop just to post this

Fandom: Apex Legends (Video Games) Rating: General Audiences Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Characters: Mirage | Elliott Witt Summary: 

Mirage is his own biggest fan, because he knows no one else will be.

Mostly an introspective/character piece I did a few weeks back for Mirage and lowkey a plea for buff (which is finally happening!!) Caustic is technically there as well.

Mirage would be elated if you told him that you'd find his picture if you looked up "Self-absorbed" in the dictionary. The idea of negative press doesn't exist to him.

Or at least that's what he tries to make it seem like.

So it would come as a surprise to most that perhaps the most egotistical and self-absorbed of the Legends does not check the ratings or read the comments on any forums about the games.

In fact, aside from hanging fanart on the walls, he keeps any fan letters in a box under his bed only for days where he's at his worst.

(He tends to have a lot of those)

Because the reality is, Mirage is his own biggest fan.

If he wasn't, who else would be? He's certain it's no one.

Growing up the youngest of four boys, it was easy for Elliott to internalize a lot of things that his brothers didn't really mean.

One of those things was that being the youngest made him the weakest.

When his brothers went off to fight in the Frontier War they told him he had the very important job of staying here and watching over their mom. He knew it was just a way to make him feel better about not being able to fight the good fight. That once again he was being excluded because he was the youngest.

It didn't really make him feel that much better when the war was still going on and he was sitting at home feeling useless.

And it definitely didn't make him feel any better when they were reported MIA once the war ended. That now he'd never get the chance to prove himself. That he had stayed at home, useless, while his brothers had fought and lost their lives.

Elliott hates being useless.

Unfortunate that his curse of uselessness seems to have followed him into the games, the one place where he thought he could finally prove himself.

Most of his teammates wouldn't guess it, but Mirage actually brings his 110% to every game.

Problem is, his 110% is not even 70% of some of his more skilled teammates.

And when everyone besides you brings something valuable to the table, you have to hide your inadequacies behind self-deprecation and humor.

Today he's the jump master and the pressure to not make a shit landing might already be getting to him a little. "Just a thought, we could land here." He throws out, trying to gauge his teammates' reactions to the spot. Annnnd dead silence. Great. He takes their silence as confirmation and launches anyways.

"Follow the leader! Or don't- do whatever, as long as we win."

Of course, suddenly his teammates find some other spot far more interesting than the one he pinged, and take that as invitation to silently break off.

He lands on his own and loots as quickly as possible. By some stroke of luck, it's not an active spot, and he gets the drop on an enemy Lifeline.

"Nobody had your back, huh? Hate when that happens." He tells her, irony not lost on him.

He loots her stuff as quickly as possible and drops out, hoping to avoid any smoke from her teammates.

"I'm down!" He hears Wraith say over the comm lines. He takes a look at his map and finds she's none too close to him.

But what is Mirage, if not at least a good teammate, even at the cost of biting off way more than he can chew?

"Uhhh, okay, don't panic, I'm coming to save you." he says with what feels like is becoming his trademark uncertainty.

He makes it all of thirty yards before the squad from earlier runs up on him, and two of them against two of him doesn't work out in his favor. "Bad news, I'm down!" He says over the comm line, using the few extra seconds his knockdown cloak buys him to inch his way into a corner out of sight. Another squad joins the fray, and the first squad ignores him in favor of not dying. He watches the firefight go down suddenly regretting his choice of words earlier. He'd much rather his team all be in one place right now.

To his relief, he can see on the map that Caustic seems to have made his way towards Wraith's now banner and recovers it.

He's not too optimistic about his own outlook though. Caustic is not the fastest legend and there's still a sizeable distance between them.

There's also the fact that Caustic has no real reason to come recover him anyways.

Mirage isn't the worst shooter in the game, but he's no Bangalore. And he's no Pathfinder, no Crypto, no Gibraltar- hell even Revenant at least deploys a death totem that he doesn't care who uses.

No he doesn't do any of the things that everyone else does. He's just another- or well several- pretty faces for people to shoot at.

And he tries, he really does. He keeps an eye on everyone's shields and weapons, keeps an eye out for useful equipment, revives and respawns teammates as soon as possible, but deep down he knows it isn't good enough. There's no advantage to teaming with him. And if there's no advantage, it means anyone stuck with him is at a disadvantage.

When he first joined the Apex Games, the last thing he was worried about was the other people. He was used to looking out for himself- he had already learned the hard way that he was the only person who'd care about what happened to him outside of his mother. So he outfitted himself with his holo-tech and did his best to make a name for himself in the games. He didn't realize at the time how integral teamwork would become, and how lacking that in turn made him.

No matter which way you flip it, all he is good for is eating bullets.

He wants to improve his holograms in some way, but he's no Wattson, and he didn't inherit any of his mother's genius. So instead he tinkers with an old holo-suit every weekend trying to figure out a way to make the modifications he wants a reality. Instead he jokes about how bad he is at this while putting in extra hours at the range whenever possible. Instead he enters combat with the confidence of a seasoned pro and none of the skill to back it up.

Self-absorbed, self-serving, and insufficient. Well aren't I just the greatest person to have on the team? Mirage thinks loathingly.

Maybe it's more fitting if he dies here alone, nothing but fakes to back him- the biggest fake of them all- up. Maybe he was wrong to think he could really be a Legend, much less a champion.

As his eyes begin to cloud over, he's ready for death's cold embrace yet again.

Instead, someone's shoes are in front of him now, and a muffled sigh of discontent is heard as a hand on his shoulder pushes him backwards gently and he's suddenly jabbed.

He really doesn't know when Caustic got here, but he expresses his thanks as Caustic pulls him to his feet.

"Your gratitude is acknowledged, let us move now before the ring comes in." The remnants of the earlier fight are still here in the form of half looted deathboxes, and he has to scour through some of those for some heals and ammo before they move on.

It's looking like the respawn beacon they were heading for won't be in the next ring, unfortunately for Wraith, so they cut their losses and head to the center.

They encounter another two or three squads, and one rambunctious Octane along the way, Mirage continuously finding himself downed in increasingly ludicrous ways.

"I've been observing... I hate to be the first person to break it to you, but I dont think you were really made for these kinds of games, Witt." Caustic confesses, while reviving Mirage for the 4th time.

He just sighs. "Yeah... yea, I know."

"So then why do you do it? Why the masochistic endeavor of placing yourself in an environment where you are the weakest link?"

"Wow, ok, little harsh there." He says, pride hurting more than the injection site of the syringe. "I just... want someone to remember me. And I guess I thought, 'What better way to be remembered than dying in the most glorious bloodsport of our generation?"

"A foolish sentiment. Life is insignificant; why not accept your fate?"

"Listen, I don't have to explain myself to you." Mirage says, a little defensive, and more than a little annoyed.

"Have it your way. Your incredible knack for narrowly defying death has provided me an insurmountable amount of data. So much to notate..."

"Glad to be of service." Mirage mutters bitterly.

Mirage does feel a little stupid when he compares his reasoning to other people's. It's not noble or some part of a larger plan. He isn't searching for answers. He isn't doing it because he has to. He isn't even being straight about it and just acting out of boredom like Octane or Revenant.

He's just worried that once everyone has forgotten him it'll be like he never existed at all.

His mom has already started forgetting... who will be left when she's gone?

It's the one thing that truly terrifies him.

So he keeps going on, even though he's the weakest link.

He keeps going on even if he's the biggest joke amongst the legends.

He keeps going on, even if everyone else is laughing at him and not with him.

Because as long as they're laughing he knows they see him.

Really, he's more concerned about what's gonna happen once they stop finding him funny.

No respawn beacon will ever be able to save him then. 

---

They don't win the game.

He wakes up alone in the med ward, common procedure for the squads upon elimination from the game.

He heads back to his room, not bothering to check the results, congratulate the champions, or talk to any of the other legends.

No one stops him.

He sits on the floor next to his bed and pulls out the box from underneath, taking out a letter at random.

The words start to blur about a paragraph in, and he puts it back once he realizes his tears are just drenching it entirely at this point.

He's ready to go home.

But there's nothing left for him to go back too.