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#i feel like. such a failure and so. crazy!!! and i feel like it seems like i dont actually want help becahse i have had so long to get it
chrisbesitos · 3 days
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Okay heres another Ballerina!reader x Dealer!chris idea:
Reader is WORN OUT from recital practice, but cant rest until she gets that ONE specific part just right (totally not projecting) so shes working on it for HOURS at home (even with the bloody feet, belive me, its a regualr thing) and REFUSES to stop
idk if that makes any sense but yea
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⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀you're in love
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( warnings: angst (a little bit), mentions of blood, cursing, fluff.
( synopsis: chris helps you when things get harder and you can't stop practicing your choreography for the recital.
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ꒰͡⠀🩰 𝅄 💸⠀͡꒱
Perfectionism. You always were a perfectionist, at school, at university and at ballet. You have the urge to be perfect and thus fuck with your head, because you don't think you can stop until your good enough. Sometimes it seems like you never will be enough and this hurts, causes not only mentally bruises, but physically too.
Well, you're accustomed to this, because it's how your brain works. Even though the pain is killing you, consuming your feet and legs like a plague. Take a deep breath and keep going, that's what you always says.
It's been hours since you're trying to do a step of your choreography perfectly, but for some reason, you can't do it right. Well, not the way you want to do. Your phone buzzing on the floor takes your attention, almost making you fall in the middle of a pirouette, you groan as you lower down to grab. It was Chris, calling you for the fifth time.
"Damn, doll. I've been calling ya', where have you been?" Chris asks through the phone, you huffs opening the cap of the bottle, taking a few sips breathing hard. "What ya' doin'? I'm fishin' some deals, wanna eat something?"
"Thank you, baby, but now I can't." You reply, holding the phone with the shoulder against your ear. You shift your feet, feeling your fingers sore, you groan in pain. "Shit." You murmured.
"Ya' good, doll?" He asks, concerned about his girl. You nod, forgetting for a moment he's not seeing you.
"Yeah, I'm just practicing now." You bite your lower lip, you need to go back to your training. "Uh, baby, what about you brought us some food? I'll have finished when you arrive here."
"Fine, doll, mind if I choose?" You deny, so Chris okay it and turned off.
You finally could go back to your practice, now putting your phone on the mute. You can't stop more, not even for calls. Chris takes more than a half hour to arrive at your place, you didn't even notice when he gets in. The smell of fresh burgers makes your stomach groans, it's been hours since your last meal, but you didn't realize you were starving until now.
"You still doin' that shit? You said you'll be ready when I get home." He says, putting the bags on the kitchen table, he looks at the living room. The couch was out of his usual place, the tv paused on the song of your choreography and you.
You were kinda a mess. Your hair is tied in a messy bun, strands of hair sticking in your sweat forehead and your cheeks red.
"Did you get attacked by a rabid raccoon?" He chuckles, you roll your eyes ignoring him. Chris raised his eyebrows at her sassy behavior, sipping his soda. "Stop that shit, let's eat."
"In a few minutes, I need to finish this." You say, turning the music on again. Chris sits in the corner of the couch, watching you do your choreography. He smiles, he loves to watch you dance, your delicate movements and the way your body moves, drives he crazy. "Fuck!" You scream, visibly frustrated with your dance, Chris frowned his eyebrows, you were perfect for him. He rested his cup on the ground, lifting from the couch to move towards you.
"What's wrong, huh? You were perfect." Chris says, cupping your cheeks with his hands. Tears were pricking in your waterline from the frustration of failure, Chris sighs pulling you closer to his chest, caressing your back with his fingers. "You're doin' great, babydoll."
"I'm not perfect." You sob on his chest, Chris shakes his head moving you to the couch, he sits and puts you on his lap. He holds your chin, making you look at him with your tearing eyes. "If I stop now, I'll not be good enough." You say, trying to get out of his lap, to get back to your practice, but Chris holds your waist, holding you hard.
"You're good enough, doll. You're perfect f'me." Chris said, cleaning your tears with his thumbs. You sniff with a little pouty in the lips, Chris chuckles cupping your cheeks. "You're the best, babydoll." He kisses your nose.
"I don't feel like I am." You whisper, leaning your head to Chris shoulder, he sighs and massages your scalp. "I'm so tired, my feet hurt." You murmured.
"How about you stop for tonight? Tomorrow I can help you with this." He caresses your thighs through the pantyhose.
"You're gonna dance with me?" You ask, lifting your head with a smile on your lips and your eyes sparkling. You always ask Chris to dance with you, but he always denies.
"Of course no, ma." He rolls his eyes, shifting on the couch with you on his legs. You huff, crossing your arms on the chest, Chris laughed undoing the ribbon from the pointe shoe you were wearing. "I said that I'm gonna help you, not dance with you."
"You're so annoying." You say, removing the claw clip of your hair and putting it aside on the couch. Chris tugged off both of your pointe shoes, gently putting on the ground, he rubbed your feet and your fingers.
"I can leave with this." He shakes his shoulders. "Uh, doll? Your feet are bleeding, is that supposed to happen?" Chris asks with a concerned look at you, he frowns his eyebrows when you slightly nod.
"It happens sometimes, it's okay." You say, caressing his shoulder, you offer him a gentle smile, saying that's everything ok. He rubbed your legs, still worrying about your bloody feet.
"Let me take care of this, 'kay?" He kisses your jaw, gently putting you on the couch.
Chris cleaned the blood from your hurt feet, putting curatives on your fingers, he also put ice and massaged until the pain was gone. He didn't let you walk to the kitchen table, he brought the food to the couch and put on tv your favorite show, he makes sure you're comfortable and good. After finishing eating, he ran you a bath with your favorite products — he's favorite also, because he loves how you'll smell after shower — and he didn't let you move a finger, because he does all the work and you don't complain.
In your bedroom, laying on the bed and under the blanket with all of your stuffed animals on the floor, Chris caresses your thighs with his finger, kissing your lips passionately. Your hands resting on his chest, scratching a bit with your nails, a smile grows in your face when he breaks the kiss.
"You're really not gonna dance with me?" You ask, with a little pouty in your lips.
"Not doin' that shit, go to sleep." Chris says, rolling his blue eyes and lifting to turn the nightstand lamp off. The last sound in the room before the silence was the sound of your laugh, before Chris held your waist and pulled you closer.
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he's just a boy in love (but he doesn't know lol) ;)
tags ; @lizzymacdonald06 @deliciousluminaryanchor @lushjunkie @sweetreliever @watercolorskyy @ivysturnss @brianna-grace12 @blahbel668 @gabri3la-sturns @strnlxlqve @stvrnzcherries @unknvhx @pvssychicken @all4l0vee @i4longhairchris @sluttybitchformattsturniolo @sophand4n4 @sturniololetstrip2
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bunnihearted · 4 months
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🍷
#im in such a bad and low mood :<#it's not just my period hormones 🥴#my wireless headphones worked fine all of yesterday and today when i wake up they're blinking#they're liked fucked up... i turn them off but they constantly turn themselves back on. when i connect them to my ipad they constantly#keep disconnecting and shutting off and turning on 🙃 it makes me so angry bc i need to wear them basically all the time#bc all the noise from neighbors and my family and outside is driving me crazy#but they just dont work anymore?? plus i cant afford new ones... esp now which brings me to my next point#bc of my mom having troubles w school and loans and work etc she was like yeah u guys might have to pay for me this summer so we'll be#proper poor 😄 she doesnt WANT that either but it just sucks bc i got $300 every month and i can barely afford anything as is#yeah so there is no chance of me buying new headphones until at least august or september ......#then im annoyed bc my sisters are passive aggressive 24/7 and hate my existence and my mom is depressed lol#and i have no one to talk to or be with. it's summer and i wanna do stuff but i just dont wanna do it alone lmao#and then im just sad bc of many things.....#also i hate myself bc im a loser failure piece of shit but like yeah that's normal for me to feel#i just hate everything and it's so hard to endure this lame ass existence skskskskks#why cant ANYTHING be good ever in my life??#i am garbage and im surrounded by bad things lmao... anyways can i just stop breathing now pls#and it's not just a 'tiny' thing like my headphones not working like it might seem to others#but when u live a life where NOTHING is good or NOTHING works everything just piles on#ppl dont seem to understand that normally bc most ppl have some good things in their lives#so they just cannot comprehend what it's like when nothing works on any level in your life lok#ofc im depressed ofc im angry and bitter and dejected. i have no good things or moments at all in my life. that tears u down#i mean ofc i could be living in an active warzone and that'd be .. pretty awful i can imagine. but yeah... my situation is still not ideal#like i mean i do actually try to practice gratitude of having a roof over my head my own room water in the pipes and food so i dont starve#i am thankful for that bc many ppl dont even have that#i still feel depressed tho <3#idk what im talking abt now i just feel SO bad and i have no one to talk to#i have nothing to do... no help no treatment... everyone hates me and wants me dead......#why should i fight when no one cares abt me anyway... well.. i mean i do wanna experience more nature but like idk#im just so exhausted... why cant i ever have smth good in my life that also dont go away after a short while lol
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toytulini · 1 month
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its clean its fucking clean i cleaned it
#toy pic post#undescribed#40gal#then dad dismissed how much fucking effort it took whether intentionally or not and i got so angry cos i already was having to#outsource reward chemicals or whatever the fuck to chocolate covered pretzels and a soda#and i was so overwhelmed from exhaustion and overstimulated to be fucking graciously regulating my emotional responses to him saying#Stupid Shit that i just got so angry i had to sleep#but i was. really determined. to manuafacture some kinda fucking reward. so i played viddygame until i fell asleep#bc that seemed like it would be better for my brain than straight up rage napping#anyway. i will. attempt the 90gal tomorrow. todayrrow. im going to. get up and get a snack and then brush my teeth and go to bed for real#bc i just cant stop fucking Horse Sleeping. i guess#so close#still much to do. i have to do the 90 and put the plants back on top of the 40 but its already so much quieter in here#which is good for me not being driven insane by. the sound of my failure to do a task.#shit i still need to dose fertilizer as well. i will try to do that before i go back to sleep#but i was too fucking angry to be thinking about Ratios of Liquid without exploding so its good i didnt attempt it earlier probably#anyway.POSTIVES: ITS CLEAN. I CAN SEE IN THE TANK AGAIN. THE PLANTS I SHOVED IN THE TOP ARE GROWING CRAZY#EVEN IF THEYRE A BIT UGLY AND LEGGY. I DIDNT FIND ANY DEAD FISH. THE KUHLIS CONSTANTLY SWIMMING UNDER THE ALGAE SCRUBBER#WAS A LITTLE ANNOYING AND INCONVENIENT BUT ALSO. CUTE AND ENDEARING. I LOVE THE STUPID NOODLE ANIMALS#i got a lot done today even if it wasnt all i wanted and many of the tasks were tiny. it got the big fucking task done that was hanging ove#over my head for weeks and making me feel intensely guilty. and now its so QUIET. like the 90 is still loud sure! but its just One of them#now!#the fucking palpable relief
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prosecutors-gambit · 1 year
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caught up on dunmeshi yesterday in preparation for the … gasp. final chapter next month. so much cute stuff i really like how its wrapping up but still so sad… one of (if not the) first manga i’ve been actively reading as it comes to a close so it’s very bitter sweet
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real
#this is so mind numbingly exhausting i don't understand how everyone else seems to just do it?#it was such a weird day#started out in a good mood but then boss scolded these two interns cause of a mistake#and like he wasn't shouting exactly but he raised his voice and said so many things like you are so careless im suffering so many losses bc#bc of you outsiders are going to think i don't have a good team and i don't have control over my team#and how we should always note things down because we're so distracted and not serious#and how before going home everyday we should report to him what work we did today#i understand that he's being reasonable (maybe? idk) but it sounded so eerily horribly like my dad i couldn't function properly for an hour#why are men so similar everywhere#why am i SO scared i could feel the disappointment radiating off him and he wasn't even mad at me and i felt like a failure#which is so embarrassing like girl stop you are a 20 year old adult woman you will not cry at your workplace because an angry man triggered#your dad issues#and upar se there was a new intern at work one year younger than me and oh my god he was so annoying#like i talked to him first bc i pitied him like what if he felt alone it was only his second day but boy literally could not stop talking😭#like ok it's kinda cool that this senior di she trusted me enough to be like you teach him this project report this when ive only been#here for 3 weeks but bhai😭 he's so annoying 😭 i have newfound respect for the di how does she handle all 7-8 of us interns i would go#crazy and shout at everyone and tell them to leave me alone 😭 but she's so patient and kind and answers dumb questions 100 times#but she's leaving this office permanently from next month bc of her ca final :( i mean very good for her she deserves better more money#better work hours better office etc. but :(( she's leaving :((#as you can see i have both dad issues and abandonment issues so fun lol
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biolums · 2 years
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my mental state: a moodboard.
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moonstruckme · 5 months
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Hiiii!! I saw that you were asking for camp counselor! James and I got an idea, what if reader and him weren’t yet together but they were both pinning on one another and he was just telling the kids how adorable the reader is and the kids thought that they would be so good together and were so happy when they finally got together!!!
Thanks for requesting sweetheart!
camp counselor!James x fem!reader ♡ 751 words
You spot James before he does you, holding court among a circle of campers enjoying their free time after lunch. The sun beats down on the unshaded bit of grass in front of his cabin, but James doesn’t seem to mind. He’s all loose and smiley, skin glowing in the afternoon light and hair that hasn’t been cut since May curling just above the rims of his glasses, meanwhile you can already feel the tickle of sweat forming on your skin. 
He looks up as you approach, grin widening the second before his face smooths into seriousness. “Careful, guys, we’ve got a wily one coming to join us,” he tells the kids. “Keep your cards close.” 
You roll your eyes, sitting down with your legs crossed beneath you between a couple of girls from your cabin. “What are you playing?” You ask them, and yet James answers anyway. 
“Blackjack.” You look up at him, and he smiles. Almost bashfully, like he’s unable to help himself. “Crazy eights,” he concedes, setting down his hand to deal you in. “Here, we’re just starting.” 
“James,” one of his boys whines, “we’re halfway through.”
“What harm does it do you, Cal?” he asks. “You’re set to win anyway.” 
“It’s okay,” you promise, “James is allowed to set me up for failure if he likes.” 
James pretends to be appalled, making the kids laugh, but he can’t keep it up for long before he’s smiling back at you. You like doing this with him, allying together. It feels like you’re in on some sort of secret, though you’re not sure what that might be. 
“It’s probably because he fancies her,” one of the other boys whispers to Cal in a not-so-low voice. 
You do your best to keep your eyes on your cards and your feelings off your face, but you feel a heat that has nothing to do with the sun creeping up the back of your neck. 
“Shush!” One of your campers, Mary, elbows the other boy sharply. “You’re so loud.” 
You don’t dare sneak a glance up at James, but when one of the girls goes, “Wait, what?” and the circle erupts in giggles, you can’t help it. He’s grinning at you, that us-against-the-world look again, like kids, right? You hope your answering smile looks half as relaxed. 
“You guys are worse gossips than my mum, you know that?” The kids’ laughter worsens as he feigns an exasperation that’s easy to see through, setting his hands on his hips. You pointedly do not notice how nicely the pose displays his biceps and forearms. “This is why I don’t tell you any real secrets.”
The boys from James’ cabin look genuinely upset. You feel a bit bad for them even as relief washes over you, tinged with a bit of disappointment.
“It wasn’t a secret?” the boy who’d spoken asks. 
James gives him a sideways look. “Hate to break it to you, mate, but look at her.” Blood rushes to your face as the kids gasp and ooh conspiratorially at each other almost too loud for you to hear him saying, “I’m only human.” 
You feel no better than the kids when the first response that rushes to your lips is shut up, but you choose to take your own advice, rolling your eyes like you think he’s joking despite the light and undeniable sincerity in James’ tone. Butterflies crowd your stomach.
“Y/n, are you gonna be his girlfriend?” one of the girls from your cabin asks, grinning ear to ear. 
“Um, it’s not quite so simple—” 
“Terrible!” James exclaims, looking around the circle with a scandalized expression. “You’re all terrible. I haven’t even asked her anything! You’re going to kill your counselor, and what then? You think the next one will let you play in her hammock?” 
“We’re not allowed to do that anymore,” another of your girls says sulkily. 
James looks to you, and you shrug, sheepish. “I got caught. They said it wasn’t safe.” 
“Whatever,” James blazes onward, “the point is, who will I have to talk to if you kill her? Be considerate, guys. Plan ahead.” 
“James,” you plead, very nearly on the brink of actual death, you’re sure. 
“And that,” he says promptly, stacking three fives and holding up his hands empty, “is how you win at crazy eights.” 
The kids erupt in shouts, pointing fingers and throwing down their cards, and James sends you a wink. 
You think you need to take a dunk in the lake. 
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peonysgreenhouse · 5 months
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-`♡´- return.
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summary: the obey me datables & luke react to mc coming back to life!
tags: obey me datables (simeon, solomon, diavolo, barbatos) x gn!reader, luke & gn!reader, hurt/comfort, implied character death, mentions of violence in solomon's parts, solomon goes a little crazy teehee
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i. simeon
he sees you there, in the celestial realm. he had known your soul was pure from the very beginning, but seeing you among the angels was like a knife to his gut, a reminder of his failures to protect you. 
you weren’t supposed to be here, not now, at least. it was far too early for you to die. simeon can’t help but feel bitterness well up within him as you turn from michael to look for someone in the crowd (he knew it was him. he hoped it was him).
your features light up – simeon feels his heart skip a beat. even now you were just as he last remembered you, he had always taken the time to visit you in the devildom, even after his internship was over. you more beautiful than any angel he had ever seen. 
you embrace him tight, and the tighter you squeeze the more he feels like he can’t breathe, the combating feelings waging a war in his mind. he should’ve been watching over you; what kind of guardian angel was he to let his human die like this?
“i’m sorry,” he doesn’t know why his voice cracks when he says it. simeon? losing his composure? he had garnered many millennia of years of experience working to keep it up. “i’m sorry i didn’t protect you.”
“it’s okay simeon,” he feels your hands squeeze the back of his cloak. a wicked thought crosses his mind; maybe if you dug your nails in harder he would have some penance for his failures. if you cut through the bone and marrow and reached his heart then maybe his father would forgive him – maybe you would forgive him for his short-comings. “i’m here now.”
“right,” he breathes you in as if to convince himself. simeon feels the strength of his bond with you overwhelm him, he can feel how much you care for him and he feels his chest fill with warmth, chasing away his guilt, if for the moment. “you’re here forever. with me. nothing can hurt you here, i promise.”
ii. luke
luke had always told you to be mindful of demons, that they were evil creatures who would take any opportunity to kill you. it had seemed that his warning had proved true in the worst way. if only he hadn’t been a cherub; if uriel had promoted him to be your guardian angel like he had asked, maybe this could’ve been avoided.
but he was overwhelmed with how happy he was at the fact that you would be spending time with him forever in the celestial realm. he had wanted nothing more ever since you had become friends in the devildom. you were the one light for him in the exchange program.
“you’re here!” luke chirps, sprinting down the golden bricks of the road to the archangels’ house. “you’re really–!” you’re suddenly enveloped in a hug as luke wraps himself around your waist. 
“hello luke!” you smile from ear to ear, ruffling up his neat hair. usually, he’d make a comment about you not treating him like a child, but for now it seems he’s too busy nuzzling into you. “it’s good to see you again.”
“yes! i’m happy to see you,” he pulls away, cheeks visibly flushed. “i’m sorry that i wasn’t there to protect you from those mean old demons but… everything will be fine now that you’re here!”
“would you like to give them a tour of the celestial realm?” michael chimes in with a smile, the younger angel’s eyes lighting up like a christmas tree.
luke nods excitedly, taking your hand in his, already tugging you out of the estate: “we have so much to do! we can’t waste any time!”
iii. solomon
solomon spirals hard.
there was a reason solomon pushed everyone away, why most people in his life were kept an arms length apart. he got too attached to things; to power, to magic, to anything that gave him that needed adrenaline rush… why would you be any different? you, the only person he has ever loved had been snatched out of his hands.
and worst of all, he had been powerless to save you. 
all the magic and demon pacts and connections in the world couldn’t stop you from bleeding out in his arms. humans like you were much too fragile for his liking; he had worked tirelessly his whole life to be anything but.
if he couldn’t get what he wanted from the damned, he would have to turn his eyes to the celestial realm. if he had to tear down the heavens and bring you crashing back down to earth, he’s sure he would. 
making bonds with angels was much more difficult than that of demons, but he found after nights of endless research that plucking a few of their feathers would get them to sing. 
he’s covered in golden ichor when he manages to bring you back – a life for a life. he finally was able to do it, not only to bring a human back to life, but to bring you back. solomon rises, shakily, as you feel your body materialize out of the magic sigil etched into the floor. he smiles gently, looking at you as if you were the only thing that mattered.
so why do you look back at him with such horror?
iv. diavolo
he had bargained with the archangels before, but never for a life.
in all accounts, a human choosing to leave the celestial realm and go to the devildom was unheard of. being cast out of heaven was notoriously the worst punishment anyone could receive.
but you do, you would always choose him over all the luxuries and beauty of the heavens every single time. it was true that love made people do stupid things.
michael sends you back to the devildom months after diavolo’s terms were set, a gift with the price of owing the ruler of the celestial realm a favor. michael was known for his kindness, but diavolo knew that there was more to him than that. he was smart enough to know that michael would never jeopardize the devildom, but angels never forgot debts owed. it was a risk, but one diavolo had no choice but to take. 
above all the benevolence and good-will he draped himself in, at his core, he was a selfish demon; perhaps moreso than anyone else in the devildom. 
he holds you against his chest the whole night. in the morning, he’d have duties and meetings to go to. but for now, you were his. 
“little one,” he mumbles into your hair, hands tight around your waist, “make a pact with me. that you may be at my side forevermore.”
v. barbatos
in so many other timelines he sees you, shining, alive. he starts to resent the other versions of himself for being happy with you (or even worse, happy with any of the others). barbatos could pull you out as easily as he could breathe; he had a mastery over his powers that other lower demons could only imagine. 
but it wouldn’t be the same, he reminds himself, it wouldn’t be his version of you. 
he knew the way to get you back, it’d be to break his own rule: do not interact with the past. diavolo had given him permission to bring you back, it would be a stain on the exchange student program if one of the humans came back dead after the second semester. but he wasn’t so sure, what if the you he brought back wasn’t the you he remembered? 
barbatos does it anyways, knowing he can’t refuse an order from his lord. the you in the celestial realm will be erased from existence replaced with the you of the past, the one who doesn’t know what it’s like to die. the two can only hope it doesn’t cause drama in the celestial realm.
“barbatos?” you question as you walk in the gardens with him, completely oblivious to it all. if he hadn’t been so happy that you had returned, he would feel guilty for not telling you of your death. sometimes, ignorance was bliss. “are you okay? you seem more quiet than usual.”
“do i?” he muses, forcing a soft smile for you. “i’m afraid i’m simply just a bit tired. sleep evaded me last night.” the last part wasn’t a lie.
“sorry to hear that,” you pout, “if you want to go nap, you should!
“do you not wish to spend time with me?”
“it’s not that…” you kick at the ground, arms crossed behind your back. “it’s just we have all the time in the world though, right? i want you to be rested when we’re together.”
he feels as if you’ve struck him with an arrow to his chest. barbatos sees your lifeless body in his mind, did you know and were trying to taunt him? or were you simply just this sweet?
“i suppose you’re right.” he nods his head, “but you’re coming with me.”
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foreingersgod · 5 months
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You’re Everything . CC
pairing: caitlin clark x reader
synopsis: caitlin clark is the best basketball player in the media right now and you can’t help but feel like you’re no good for her.
y’all i don’t even write (so sorry if this is actual ass), but the cc content on here is almost non existent lol. so i hope you all enjoy :)
my masterlist: here
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college is extremely hard, and unfortunately for you, it has pushed you to your breaking point.
unlike your girlfriend, caitlin, you’ve never been the athletic type. typically confined to your textbooks and essays rather than on the court or out in the field. Your studies were incredibly important to you and you were GOOD at school, but by no means were you as talented as the caitlin clark.
you’re so proud of caitlin, truly. she’s come some far in her athletic career. she deserves all the praise and all of the awards and all of the support. but regardless all the praise and admiration you showered her with, you couldn’t help but feel like you weren’t enough.
books littered the covers of your bed, chemistry worksheets and math textbooks seemed to stack up to the ceiling. your fingers dug into your scalp, lightly pulling at your hair. you had midterms coming up and you were starting to panic. last semester, midterms and finals flew by like a breeze and you were able to hold a very high gpa, but unfortunately this semester you’re crashing and burning. you were falling behind on assignments, forgetting due dates, and failing exams no matter how hard you studied. caitlin constantly reassured you that you were doing amazing regardless of how different your grades were last semester, but it’s really easy to say that when you’re passing every class and making history in basketball at the same time.
tears threatened to spill from your eyes and it felt like you were going to faint from all this stress. as you were sloppily scribbling down equations and flipping through flash cards, you failed to hear constant knocking and the lock of your front door turning. heavy footsteps echoed up to your room and you knew all too well who they belonged to. trying to get everything in order before your girlfriend reached your room, you quickly wiped your tears away and fixed your hair.
“YN i’ve been texting you like crazy, did you not-” she began. “hey hey hey what’s the matter, baby”
caitlin immediately seemed panicked at your distressed state, rushing over to you and sitting next to you on the bed. her arms instinctively wrapped around you as you nuzzled your head into her neck to hide your tears.
“it’s nothing, i swear, im just stressed for my chem exam” you lied. “you caught me at a bad time i guess” you attempted laugh it off, pulling a fake smile into the side of neck.
she pulled away from you, hands moving from you shoulders to your face, forcing you to look at her. she seemed to be looking at you for hours, studying the pain on your face and the dullness of your eyes.
“baby this is obviously not ‘nothing’…i’ve never seen you like this. over anything”
it didn’t take long for you to start tearing up again. “caitlin, i…i really don’t know…”
you can’t even get the words out. it felt like your sentences were building up in your throat and suffocating you. a small whimper managed to work its way out of you before you broke down in tears. again, caitlin was all over you, confused and hurt because she doesn’t know how to help you.
“YN please, please talk to me i need to know what’s going on, you’re scaring me” she said, pushing loose stands of hair out of your face and wiping your tears with the sleeve of her sweatshirt.
“i just-” you began, hiccuping from your sobs “i just feel like a failure!”
and that started it all. before caitlin could even protest such as absurd statement, all of your feelings and insecurities came spewing out.
“caitlin i’m extremely proud of you, please know that. i’ve never been so astonished by someone’s talent than yours” you sounded hysteric, you were sure. “but i cant help but feel like i’m a failure compared to all the amazing things you’ve done. you’ve broken records and changed people’s lives…you’ve won the awards and the adoring fans…and again, i can’t even begin with how proud of you i am…but looking back at all the things i’ve done…i’m nothing. for fucks sake i can’t even pass a god damn chemistry exam or a math quiz without losing my fucking mind. i don’t leave the house cause i’m too busy studying and i don’t have time to hang out with our friends or hang out with your team. i can barely pass my classes this semester and i just feel like such a burnout.”
it felt like it all came out in seconds. “you deserve so much better than someone like me. i’m nothing”
the silence that filled the room was heavy and haunting. you worked up enough courage to finally look at caitlin, scared that she’d realized you were right and confirm your worst fears. but to your surprise, she was crying too.
“you’re everything” her voice cracked, barely managing to get the words out. “baby you’re everything.”
“what?”
“is this how you’ve really felt? like you’re nothing?” you avoided her gaze “YN i couldn’t even begin to tell you how amazed i am by you. forget me, look at you!”
“cait.”
“no, i’m serious. you work your ass off every single day. you study you do your homework you go to work, and you still find the time to shower me with so much love and attention. you pour your soul into everything that you do and of course it’s hard, but please do not sit here and tell me i deserve more than you because i need you more than i need air, YN”
it felt like you had no more tears to shed, overwhelmed with feelings. so instead you took your girlfriends face into your hands, forcing your lips upon hers. you could feel her hands meander to the back of your head, toying with the hairs at the nape of your neck as she pulled you into a much deeper kiss.
eventually pulling away for air, you rest your forehead against hers while she whispers gentle “i love you”s . you finally feel relieved for the first time in a while.
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maibeenot · 1 month
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Last one about TUA season 4, for now.
(I talked about this in the tags of one of my RBs before but I wanted to elaborate)
I don't like how they keep trying to make Five a badass.
I find it especially frustrating as doing this constantly, bogs down any form of character development we could've had from Five.
For whatever reason, the writers seem to be allergic to acknowledging Five's biggest character flaw, his arrogance. Five always has to be right. He always has to be capable of everything and never needs any help. Despite the fact that Diego also has a very similar flaw (and is punished for it consistently), Five's seems to go completely untouched.
(A part of me thinks that the reason why they punish Diego so much more is because he comes off as the hot-headed impulsive one. While that's true, it certainly doesn't negate Five's ability to make mistakes or be incompetent)
Instead, they keep trying to invent a new flaw for Five in that; he is obsessed with the apocalypse. In reality, he's not obsessed with the apocalypse. He's obsessed with keeping his family safe. It just so happens that their most immediate threat (in his eyes) tends to be the apocalypse. (I really don't understand what they're trying to get at with this, especially considering the fact that he already has an extremely apparent flaw)
While this isn't an issue I take with season 4 specifically, it has definitely amplified this issue like crazy. Five's arrogance is vaguely addressed by his siblings in season 1, but it never seems to get him in trouble? Or at least he doesn't seem to have learned from it (except for the time-travelling thing from when he was 13, and when he bled out also in season 1)
Season 1 (and 2) handled it the best out of the four. Five never seems to ask for or accept help unless backed into a corner (telling Viktor about the apocalypse, asking Klaus to help him get the prosthetic eye). Or if he is literally incoherent or unconscious (him passing out from blood loss, him being drunk and telling Diego and Luther about what's happening).
And outside of that, Five's arrogance still had brutal consequences within this season (him not noticing Viktor's declining mental state because he was so sure about the apocalypse (but this was partially because this man tunnel-visions like crazy)).
(there are probably more instances of this with s1 & 2, i just can't think of them off the top of my head so tag them if you'd like)
Season 4 is extra mean with this. From the 'Five getting to work for the CIA at 19' to 'Five randomly figuring out what's causing the end of the world with a bunch of other Five's' while he was off moping.
And when he does make mistakes, it's not because he's actually not capable of everything and anything.
Noooo, Ben really really sneakily stole the marigold and spiked the sake. Five couldn't have possibly noticed. (and none of the other siblings for that matter)
Noooo, it's because Luther is actually super smart in figuring out that Five's boss is a Keeper (no shade to Luther btw, I like him. They just don't treat this moment as Five being a complete dumbass).
Oh no! Five (and Lila) can't figure out a way back from the metro! Never mind, another Five managed it.
Five being a homewrecker? That's him being an asshole, not incompetent so it doesn't count (lighthearted).
Five's arrogance one of his defining flaws, yet it's not really challenged. The fact that he gets away with a lot of bullshit is simply because he can! When he doesn't face failure, he doesn't find growth. He doesn't learn to stop being self-destructive just because he thinks he can do anything. He doesn't learn to reach out.
This stunt in growth is obviously not only present in Five but also everyone else. I just find his to be particularly grating since he's my favorite.
Feel free to add your thoughts to this, not just about Five's fucked up character growth but everyone else's too!
(I'll make long a ass post/video essay going into detail about all of them one of these days)
I'd love to read them :)
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girlgenius1111 · 7 months
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miscommunications + conversations
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alexia x reader alexia has practically stopped speaking in the wake of her second surgery. it's stressing you out, but you don't quite know how to tell her. she gets it out of you anyway. mentioned this the other day, but changed the title :) angst x fluff
"Do you need anything?" You asked, rising from your spot on the couch a safe distance away from your incredibly grouchy girlfriend.
"No." She responded, barely turning her attention away from the old match she had playing on her ipad. You sighed, realizing that it was the match against Benfica. Again. She'd been playing it over and over since her injury, in an almost obsessive manner. You'd said something about it, but she'd simply fixed you with the glare you'd become quite familiar with, and you'd dropped the subject.
Alexia wasn't an easy patient. You'd known this before her second knee surgery, but you were still astounded at how stubborn she was being. She'd barely spoken more than a word to you in weeks, and even though she pulled you close into her at night when she thought you were asleep, you hadn't ever felt like such a failure in your entire life.
Alexia wasn't okay, and she needed something. Something that you couldn't figure out, something you weren't giving her. It was driving you crazy, this feeling of inadequacy.
You were tired, worried, tired of being worried, stressed, and in need of a break. From anything, any one of your responsibilities.
You'd had a lengthy double session today, followed by a long time in the film room reviewing the last match. You'd looked forward to coming home and relaxing all day, but now that you were here, the distance between you and your girlfriend felt suffocating. It was all too much; Alexia acting like a robot, half the team being injured, game after game scheduled for the next week. You felt so stressed you thought your bones might literally shatter under the pressure.
After another rejection of conversation from Alexia, you knew you had to get out of the house before you broke down and cried in front of her. It wasn't her fault you weren't doing a good enough job taking care of her. It wasn't her fault you were so exhausted, every movement was difficult, even though you couldn't, for the life of you, sleep.
You didn't see Alexia look up after you as you left, walking back into the bedroom and pulling your phone out. You clicked the contact you were looking for, hoping she'd answer, and hoping she'd be willing to help you out today.
"Hola."
"Mapi, can you come over and sit with Ale for a bit?"
"Sí, of course. Is everything all right?" Mapi replied, usual joking manner replaced with a sympathetic one. Mapi knew all too well how Alexia was acting.
'Yeah, yeah. I just need a break." You explained. Mapi said she understood, and promised that she'd be there soon. She didn't live far, and you took a few calming breaths in the bedroom, before stepping back out to where Alexia was sitting. This time, she did look up at you, her face scrunching in concern when she noticed just how drained you looked.
It wasn't the first time she'd noticed that you were struggling, but every time she brought it up, the only time you really got more than a few words out of her at once, you turned the conversation around, trying to get her to open up to you. She hadn't missed this, but she assumed that you'd tell her what was going on when you felt ready. Alexia didn't quite seem to realize the effect her cold behavior was having on you.
"I'm gonna go run some errands. Mapi will be here in a bit, and I'll be back in a couple hours." You explained shortly, pressing a kiss onto Alexia's soft lips, and slipping out the door before she could say anything.
Once you were out the door, all bets were off, and you felt tears pooling in your eyes. It was a good thing you hadn't waited for Mapi to arrive, because you wouldn't have made it that long without breaking down in front of her, and that would have just been embarrassing.
Although, getting in the car and driving to an empty parking lot to cry wasn't really any less embarrassing.
-----
You came back from your rather pathetic drive, and walked into the house, finding your girlfriend in deep discussion with her best friend. Though you felt marginally better, you realized you'd forgotten something rather important; crying in your car for an hour would leave you with red and puffy eyes, tear stained cheeks. You hadn't done anything to hide the evidence.
This was clear when both girls stopped talking and looked at you, faces heavy with concern. Mapi stood, crossed the room as quickly as she could on crutches, and pulled you into a hug. The words she whispered in your ear were only for you to hear.
"Talk to your girlfriend. She's going crazy not knowing what's wrong with you."
You sighed, nodding slightly as you led Mapi to the door, waving to Ingrid, biting your tongue to avoid telling Mapi that you hoped she enjoyed her playdate. You and Ingrid had been making the joke for weeks, driving your respective girlfriend's back and forth to each other as they couldn't drive, feeling like parents of 2 very grumpy children.
When you returned to the living room, to Alexia, she was sitting on the couch with her arms crossed over her chest, knee extended in front of her, looking carefully at you. She looked like Alexia again, her hazel eyes looking somehow both sternly and softly at you.
"If I left the house to cry, you would kill me in my sleep."
She wasn't wrong. You were on Alexia all the time about being more vulnerable with you. It was possible, you supposed, that you were being a bit of a hypocrite.
"I didn't leave to go cry, I left, and I cried. It was coincidental." You argued back, sitting next to her on the couch, and taking her outstretched hand. Hers was so much larger than yours, and it encapsulated it completely, the rough calluses and the tight hold she had on you making you feel inexplicably safe. 
"I do not believe you. You have been upset all week, and you refused to tell me why. You call Mapi to come babysit me, you make up an errand to run, and you go cry in your car. When you are upset, you are supposed to tell me, so I can help."
You looked away from her, the extent to which she knew you being slightly overwhelming. Of course she'd known you were upset, and of course she hadn't pushed too hard. Alexia was perfect in that way, always knowing what you needed.
"Mírame," Alexia rasped and you turned towards her, lip wobbling as you finally met her gaze. "Amor," she sighed, pulling you in until you collapsed against her chest. It was a familiar position, with your head resting against her sternum, her arms holding you close. It felt like it had been ages since she’d held you, and you curled into her, clutching tightly onto the green hoodie she was wearing, feeling her lips press softly onto the top of your head. 
You still weren’t fully sold on breaking down in front of her, not when she was the one who had every right to be upset and angry with the world. You had thought, too, that you were all cried out. Unfortunately not, as you took several stuttering breaths trying to stave off your sobs before they really even started. 
Alexia stroked your hair, scolding you very gently. “No, stop that. Cry if you need to, mi amor. You can always feel what you need to feel when you are with me, sí?” 
You tried to pull away, but Alexia was too strong, keeping you stubbornly pressed to her chest.“I can’t, Ale, you-”
“Forget about me. You need to cry, you need me to hold you. We worry about you right now. Not me.” The blonde insisted, her hand sliding up your shirt, blunt nails scratching lightly over your back. She was pulling out every trick she knew to make you fall limp against her, doing everything she could to get you to let go, let her be strong for you when you were always so strong for her. 
You spent the next few minutes almost crying, almost letting go, but not quite. Your hands were fisted in the fabric of Alexia’s sweatshirt, and even though she was telling you that it was okay, you couldn’t stop yourself from fighting against the flood of emotion rushing through you. 
“Mi niña bonita, it’s okay. You’re safe to feel what you need, amor, please.” 
“I can’t Ale,” you whimpered, allowing Alexia’s hand to tilt your chin up away from her chest, towards her face. 
“Why?” She asked, so gently, so adoringly, that you felt a piece of your heart stitch itself back together. 
“You need me to be strong.” 
Alexia shook her head. “No, I need you to be okay. And you are not right now, are you?” 
You responded hesitantly, although you had no argument against her. It was rather evident that you were far from okay. “No.” 
“No.” Alexia repeated, her thumb rubbing little circles into your cheekbone. “You do not need to pretend with me. You have been so perfect, so strong. Let me be strong for you now, okay? Please?” 
Something in her voice, the pleading edge to it, broke you, and you rested your forehead back against your girlfriend’s chest, body trembling harshly with sobs. You inhaled deep gasps of Alexia’s perfume in between your cries, and tried to let it wash over you, as her words were doing. 
“There you go, bebé. You’re alright. I love you. Te tengo, amor. Te amo y te tengo, mi niña bonita.” 
You weren’t sure where this Alexia had come from, the emotionally intelligent version of your girlfriend having been missing for weeks, but you weren’t complaining. Far from it, in fact, as you cried so hard you shook against her, so hard that you exhausted yourself within minutes, gasping breaths turning into quiet whimpers as your eyes fluttered shut, and you relaxed into a light sleep against the blonde. Alexia held you with an unmoving steadiness, even when her knee started to feel stiff from the position it was in. She knew that she’d played some role in whatever was going on here, and she was quite determined to make it up to you. For now, though, she was happy to let you sleep, looking more peaceful than you had in a while. 
------ 
You woke up when Alexia began to shift uncomfortably under you. She couldn’t help it, she’d been laying in the same position for an hour, and her knee was really starting to complain. The blonde had tried to keep still, not wanting to disturb you, but she was clearly not successful when your eyes fluttered open, swollen and red, as you gazed up at your girlfriend. Her jaw was set, but she looked at you apologetically, sighing when you shot up off of her, looking frantically at her knee. 
“I am okay, bebé,” she began.
You scrambled up off of her, practically running to the kitchen to get a new ice pack. 
“Amor, come back,” she called, really not wanting to let you out of her sight before you told her what was wrong. You did return, ice pack in hand but you ignored Alexia’s attempts at conversation, carefully stretching her knee out and adjusting it to a better position. She sighed in relief despite herself, and you gently wrapped the new ice pack around her knee, before giving her an unimpressed look.
“You should have woken me.” 
“I was fine.” Alexia argued, opening her arms to invite you back against her. You hesitated, looking between her face and her knee. “Ven aqui, amor.” 
You relented slightly, curling against her side again to rest your head on her shoulder. Her lips left a soft kiss on the side of your head, and you settled in closer, the feeling of your girlfriend’s arms around you being so perfect after such a tough few weeks. 
“Talk to me, please.” Alexia said quietly after a minute.
“About what?” You replied, partly because you wanted to avoid this conversation, and partly because you knew it would annoy Alexia. 
The blonde pinched your arm lightly, not needing to say anything for you to take a deep breath, and try to explain yourself. 
“I’m just stressed. Everything with the team, the amount we have to play coming up. I’m exhausted, and there’s no time for a break.” 
It was half the truth, half the story, but you deeply hoped Ale would buy it. You didn’t need her to feel like she was burdening you, not when it was your fault, and not when she was having a hard enough time as it was. 
It was quite on brand with how things were going that Alexia saw right through you. 
“And I am not helping.” She murmured, her hand grabbing yours. Her voice was filled with guilt and regret, and you couldn't stand it. 
“No, Ale,”
“Sí,” she interrupted. “I have been moody and quiet and completely unhelpful. That is stressing you out more, yes?” 
To be honest, Alexia wouldn’t have reached that conclusion an hour ago. While you slept, though, she’d been thinking long and hard, and came to the realization that in her attempts to protect you from how awful she was feeling, she’d shut you out. 
“Yeah.” You allowed. 
“I need more than that, bebé.” 
You gave an annoyed huff, but there wasn’t really anything behind it. “It’s not your fault, Ale. It’s hard that I can’t fix everything for you, but it’s not your fault, it’s mine.” 
“I do not need you to fix it for me, amor.” Alexia cut in. 
“It would make it easier if you could tell me how to help you, because what I’m doing isn’t working.” You continued, having worked up the courage to say what you were feeling, and were sure that if you stopped now, you wouldn’t be able to continue. 
“No no no. You have not done anything wrong, you have done everything right.”
You didn’t believe her. “Then why are you so upset with me?” 
Your voice was so small and so hesitant, Alexia shut her eyes for a minute, willing away her emotion so she could explain herself to you. 
“I am not upset with you, amor. I… I am miserable because I cannot play, and I did not want to put that on you. I thought that I was helping you, not stressing you out with my feelings.” 
You shifted against her, the look on your face causing Alexia to sink back into the couch. 
“Well that did the opposite. I was worried anyway. I’m always going to worry, baby. I worry less if you tell me what you’re thinking, though.” 
Now it was Alexia’s turn to shrug noncommittally. You had on that look, though, and Alexia knew she’d cave within a minute. 
“I am sorry, amor. I should have talked to you. I made you stressed and upset for no reason.” 
You sighed dramatically, leaning in to lightly kiss her cheek. “I forgive you. You better start keeping a journal though, and let me read it every night before bed. All of your feelings of the day, written down for me to look through. Then I won’t be mad anymore.” You joked, and Alexia snorted. 
“Fine, you write one too. All your feelings. We’ll trade, and never have to talk to each other.” 
“Perfect.” You smiled, leaning your forehead against hers. 
“Perfect.” She agreed, eyes shutting at the close contact. 
“I love you.” You mumbled. 
“Te amo mucho. Even when you get tears all over my car, and make me beg you to talk to me.” 
You pulled away rolling your eyes. “Fine. You can get your own ice packs, massage your own knee, and drive yourself to your grumpy playdates with Mapi.” 
“Playdates!” Alexia gasped, yanking you back down on top of her, and poking you in the side, making you giggle against your will. “You take away my massages, I take away yours.” Alexia warned. 
You turned to her, betrayed. “You like giving me massages as much as I like getting them.” You reminded her. 
Alexia smiled playfully, her hand creeping up the front of your shirt. You shivered at the contact, taking in the smirk on your girlfriend’s face, knowing exactly what she had in mind. “Do I like to give massages? I do not remember. You will have to remind me.” 
You rolled your eyes, but leaned in, Alexia dominating the heated kiss even as you hovered on top of her, though she was slightly breathless when you slipped your tongue into her mouth. That was Alexia, though. In control of every situation, except when it came to you. Evidently, Alexia didn’t always use her brain when it came to you, her heart took over, and she made decisions she wouldn’t normally make. It was hard to complain, though, when she looked at you like you single handedly made the earth spin on its axis. No, you couldn’t complain. You were her weak spot, and you knew how lucky you were to hold that position.  
-----
some angst and fluff for ya <3
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rs-hawk · 7 months
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Another version of Bestie’s Werewolf Brother where you two have fallen out of contact for years and when he finds out you’re having a baby with someone else because you start being friends with his sister again and he gets really possessive and starts stalking you again. He finds out you’re a single mom and suddenly he realizes he just wants a baby with you even if it’s not his pup 🥺❣️Mostly fluff plz but I’d love some smut too
Not you bringing out this trope when I literally posted it’s my fave. Lol. No smut all fluff but I might do more with this if y’all like it 🥰
When you got pregnant your boyfriend acted like he was happy. He lavished you in compliments and told everyone how excited he was to be starting a family with you. Your childhood bestie and you even reconnected, her excited about baby names and planning your baby shower. It’s like you picked up right where you left off.
When you ask about her brother, she’s obviously uncomfortable. She comes up with all kinds of excuses about why he doesn’t want to talk to you, or why he seemed to have just vanished off social media recently. You can’t help but feeling hurt but you keep it to yourself.
When you catch your boyfriend cheating on you, you end up packing up all your stuff in a night and moving back in with your parents. It sucks. You can’t help but feel like a failure. You start going for walks more at the local park, just trying anything to keep your mind off your predicament.
“Hey,” you heard a familiar voice say from behind you.
You didn’t know that he had already been stalking you for months. Ever since he found out you were pregnant. He thought he could get past it, get past you, but hearing that you had been with someone else drove him crazy. He wanted to be angry with you. To hate you, even, and that other man’s baby, but the longer he stalked you, the more he realized how much he missed you. How he just wanted to be around you again.
“Hi,” you said as you turned around, awkwardly holding your arms in front of your stomach. You knew he knew, but you couldn’t help but wish this wasn’t the first time he was seeing you after all these years.
“It looks like you’re doing well.”
You shrugged, moving your arms and shoving your hands in your pockets. “I guess.”
“My sister said you’re… getting engaged,” he managed to get out without growling.
“We were, but some stuff happened. I’m living back at home until I can find a place.”
He knew he shouldn’t be happy, but he was. After that, he started offering to help you with everything. Need someone to drive you to an OBGYN appointment? Needed help putting the bassinet together? Couldn’t figure out which kind of car seat to get? He was always there and offering to help.
You were surprised, pleasantly so. You’d never thought much about it, but you didn’t think that he would be so involved in your pregnancy when 1) you weren’t dating and 2) it wasn’t his baby. As the weeks passed, he started asking to touch your stomach when he saw movement. He came to your parents’ house all hours of the day if you even hinted that you wanted to see him or if you wanted something.
When you went into labor, your mother took you, much to his disappointment. He came to visit you of course, but he seemed a little off when he came in. His head was down, and he wasn’t nearly as imposing as he normally was, especially considering he was mostly shifted. Then a nurse came back in with the baby after giving a bath.
“Oh! Here’s Dad,” she smiled as she placed the small bundle in his arms, though she did admittedly look a little uneasy.
You started to correct her, but he just started at the little one in his arms with wide eyes. You’d never seen him be so gentle. His ears were perked up, and you couldn’t help but notice his tail started to wag. He shushed you mid-sentence as you tried telling the nurse he wasn’t the dad.
“Human babies are so tiny,” he whispered, rocking the baby in his arms.
The nurse looked between you before slipping out. He stayed almost the entire time you were in the hospital. Even your parents left more often than him. While he was attentive to you, he was even more attentive to the baby. Asking the nurses to show him how to swaddle. Reading up on when human babies can eat solid food (because it’s just a couple months for pups).
He’s the one that took you home. Your parents are excited when they see his car pull up and you’re admittedly a little confused. When you get inside, you see that he took it upon himself to baby proof everything. He put together an entire nursery when you were just going to have the baby sleep in your room in the bassinet. He even sprung to get a crib since he had read online that infants can only be in bassinets for a few months.
That’s when you realize that he really is the best for you. He’s always been the best for you, and he’s the best for your baby too. The baby fell asleep in his arms before he settled the tiny bundle into the crib. Tears pricked your eyes as you wrapped your arms around his back, burying your face in his shoulder.
“You’ll stay, right?”
A low rumble in his chest vibrated your body when he spun around, grabbing you up in his arms. “I’ll never leave again.”
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silhouetteonpaper · 26 days
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Public Figure
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Summary: The world wants to know all about you as the newest addition to the Avengers. But what happens when a normal interview session digs up something you’ve never told a soul… not even Natasha? Natasha Romanoff x Reader WC: 1,616 Warnings: Mentions of killing
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“A new addition to the Avengers leaves the city on the edge of their seats as we all wait to hear more about this young recruit. A public Q&A with the new Avenger in question is set to take place this week. Stay tuned for more coverage on all things current…”
You turn the volume of the TV down, your commitment to attending this public event starting to fill you with regret. It’s been a week of officially being a part of the team, and to say the city is going crazy would be an understatement.
“How’re you feeling?” Natasha sits down beside you on the couch, eyeing the TV as the newscaster spews more words about you and the rest of the team.
You shrug, rubbing your forehead to try and push away the increasing stress. “I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t nervous.”
“It’s okay to be nervous.” She consoles you, but you’re aware she doesn’t know the real reason why you’re so anxious about the whole ordeal.
“What if the world isn’t ready for… someone like me?” You ask, partially rhetorically—but something in you hopes Nat has a real answer. The city has created turmoil over certain Avengers in the past, and the last thing you want is to cause commotion. All you’re trying to do is save the world, which you’d think would make everyone like you. Unfortunately, it’s never that simple.
Natasha takes a deep breath, seeming to search her brain for the right words. “Look, it’s up to you how you present yourself, but you can’t control how everyone else sees you. I know for a fact you’ve done so much good here, and that’s all I care about.” Nat offers you a smile.
You wish you could return it, but something inside you churns with guilt. “What about my past? All those records… someone’s likely to dig them up. It’ll make me look like the monster I used to be—or maybe still am…” You become lost in your own thoughts, the idea of someone digging up your past haunting your present.
A part of you has never let go of the person you used to be, in the off chance someone betrays your trust or sets you up for failure. You’re physically a different person now, making great waves with the Avengers, doing good all around the world—but that doesn’t mean you’ve forgotten about the person you left behind before moving into the compound.
“If they go low enough to do that to you, we can deal with it,” Natasha’s continued support pulls you out of your thoughts. “You know I understand that better than anyone. Do I look worried?” She raises her eyebrows.
You finally smile, shaking your head. “No, but that’s not fair because you never look worried.”
“Because there’s nothing to be worried about.”
The day of the event finally arrives, and you’re already on the verge of a breakdown. Natasha has prepped everything ahead of time so you wouldn’t have to use extra energy, starting with the freshly ironed outfit hanging in your closet.
You feel mostly prepared when it’s time to drive over to the venue, two of your biggest supporters right at your side. Tony and Natasha are even more ready than you are, the pair ready to defend any harmful questions and comments.
As great as it is to have such powerful people at your side, it only does so much to aid the growing nerves inside you. “Breathe. This’ll be over before you know it. We just need to answer some questions, let them get to know you, and then we’ll go celebrate.” Natasha explains with a calm voice.
You only manage to nod as you worry talking will expel all the air in your lungs. As soon as the sleek van arrives outside the tall pillared building, you’re greeted by a storm of paparazzi camera flashes. Nat warned you about this, but nothing could have prepared you for the intense crowd shoving cameras and microphones your way.
Tony attempts to hold off the extra pushy photographers, but he can only do so much swimming upstream. As soon as you make it into the building, there’s no time to take a breath as a crowd of important looking people sit staring directly at you.
Breath. Natasha mouths, offering yet another warm smile. You take a deep breath, heading forward with one foot in front of the other.
A facilitator guides the three of you to a table on a raised stage, the perfect amount of room for three to sit at the microphone-filled surface. You find a spot right in the middle, knowing exactly what’s coming the second you sit down.
“Question!”
“Over here!
“Miss, question!”
A caucus of voices fills the room, soon being silenced as the facilitator calls on one. “Ma’am, please describe to us the superhuman capabilities you bring to the team.”
You swallow thickly while leaning into the bouquet of microphones. “Well, uhm… I can manipulate energy. Turning off lights, powering machines, emitting beams of light… uh, yeah.” You lean back, taking another deep breath.
The sudden eruption of voices makes you jump, the facilitator following the same routine and calling on another person. “Does the team feel that these abilities have the possibility to be dangerous?”
You knew it was coming, a question like this. Natasha sees your frozen state and is quick to comment before you have the chance. “Anyone can be dangerous with the wrong intentions. We wouldn’t have recruited her if we didn’t feel she was a great asset. Not only is she doing well in training, she’s exceeding our original expectations.” You nod at her in thanks, getting one in return.
“What do you have to say about the murder of Jean Ridley?” An interviewer juts in. Your mouth goes dry, any response unable to form. The cacophony of voices fills the room as you go completely quiet. Jean Ridley, the young girl who was just trying to live her life, in the wrong place at the wrong time.
Back when you were on your streak of crime—before the Avengers took you in—you wouldn’t hesitate to demolish anything in your path to succeed. Including the little girl who didn’t even know what she was a part of. In an attempt to terminate a larger target, Jean just happened to be a casualty. An even larger casualty than you realized at the time.
“I implore you to ask our newest recruit questions about her current position, otherwise we’re done here.” Natasha’s voice brings you back from the overflowing guilt spreading across your mind like wildfire. You slide your hands under the table as they begin to shake, attempting to press them against your thighs before anyone has a chance to see the weak criminal that somehow made it onto the team.
Natasha looks at you and nods, her gaze quickly darting to your hands before she places her own on top. The shaking is soothed, but your nerves aren’t. The crowd of voices continues as the flood of worry destroys your mind. Everyone knows your past now, and there’s nothing you can do to hide it.
The rest of the interview session goes as smooth as it could have, the last of the inappropriate questions ending when Tony finally threatened to expose every document the council is holding, his defense being ‘if I can find it, it’s public information.’
The drive home is silent, but that’s not to say you don’t feel the pressure of Natasha’s eyes on you the whole way back. As soon as you arrive at the compound, you make a swift escape to your room. The only thing you want is to hide yourself from the rest of the world, your entire past seeming to chase you back into the dark abyss you came from.
The second your door slams shut, the noise stops. All the voices in your head screaming you’re a monster, you’ll never be a hero, get trapped in the hallway. The silence is peaceful, no shouting interviewers or civilians with snide questions. Just you and the cold surface of the door on your back.
But it’s unfortunately short lived as a soft knock sounds. You move away from the door, already guessing the person standing on the other side. The overwhelming tornado of insecurities topples into your room as the Widow walks in, a concerned expression painted on her face.
You already know what’s coming, a long winded pep-talk about how you’re more than your past. You don’t even bother lifting your head when Natasha bends down beside you.
“Look,” Her sudden firmness takes you by surprise. “What they said was wrong, but you can’t control what others say or do. You can either sit here and weep, or get out there and prove to them they’re wrong.”
Natasha’s words leave you speechless as your gaze slowly finds her. She’s looking directly at you, her green eyes warm yet expression stern. That’s when you realize you don’t have a choice.
Again and again, Natasha has directed you onto the best path. From recruiting you for the Avengers, to training you, to avoiding utter chaos in the face of the public eye—Nat’s proved she knows what she’s talking about.
“I know it’s hard to keep moving forward when the entire world is trying to paint you as something you’re not, but the only thing you can do is show them who you really are.” She affirms, her eyes still stuck on you.
And in this moment, you know she’s right. There’s no reason to sit here in self pity, rehashing the past that won’t ever just disappear no matter how hard you shove it down. The only thing you can do—the only thing left to do—is prove them all wrong. To show them the hero you can truly be.
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nyuoqi · 2 months
Text
            — SO I MARRIED MY ANTI-FAN     ౨ৎ     SES
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O11.    hello dubai
✸ SYNOPSIS !  : congratulations! you have been invited to korea's #1 romance reality show 'We Got Married' where you will be living with your co-star like a married couple. but what will you do when you find out that your husband is actually your anti-fan?
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(1.3k wc, not proofread)
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"IS THIS YOUR FIRST TIME GOING TO DUBAI? " you ask , breaking the deafening silence that surrounds the both of you as you seat in the comfy seat of business class which is slowly driving you crazy.
it has only been half an hour since your plane departed from incheon international airport. both you and EUNSEOK already finding comfort in your seats for the next nine and a half hour.
initially, you wanted to put on a few movies before falling asleep for the rest of the flight. however, your search for the perfect flight movie comes to a failure as you find nothing that piqued your interest after scrolling for half an hour.
EUNSEOK on the other hand seems to have settled down perfectly. unlike you who struggle to find an activity to stick with for the rest of the flight, EUNSEOK has already decided to listen to music while reading a book.
upon hearing your voice, EUNSEOK takes one of his earphones out to listen to your question properly.
"no, this is actually my first time going to dubai. " an awkward silence engulfs the both of you after he speaks.
a gust of wind from the cold air conditioner blows past you two, your body slightly shivering as the tiny hair on your body jumps at it— showing the severity of the awkward tension in between the both of you.
noticing the situation you guys seem to ne in, EUNSEOK takes responsibility to break the wall that is separating you and him by clearing his throat, "is this also your first time going to dubai? "
it's clear that despite EUNSEOK's effort to cool things down, the tension between the two of you has only gotten thicker— as if it wasn't thick enough already— the moment you attempt a conversation with him.
curse you for being so picky about movies.
your face blank as you opt to stare at him as if he's some kind of mirror you could reflect your actions to. the longer you stare, the harder you feel your conscience slapping you across the face.
except your overbearing silence freaks EUNSEOK out a bit, he shuffles in his seat, backbone unnaturally straightened creating a very great yet awkward posture.
"is there something on my face? " perhaps you stare a little too long. you blink your eyes and meet EUNSEOK's terrified one, lacing with fear.
 you mentally face palm yourself for not saying anything despite being the one who asked the question.
"oh sorry, i didn't mean to stare. " you can feel heat creeping up your cheeks. to say that you are embarrassed would be an understatement, you are completely appalled.
EUNSEOK looks away, his face showing a mirrored expression to yours— except his cheeks aren't pink. aside from that, you can easily tell from his slightly widened eyes and he way he captures his bottom lip in between his teeth is enough to tell you that he is embarrassed.
and you know this for sure because you may still be string at him. 
maybe just not hard enough considering the fact that you missed the way his ears are in a very bright shade of pink.
another gust of wind blows over.
this time, you decide to take the upper hand in fixing whatever mess of a battle of awkward silence you started and smack your lips together. "would you like to watch a movie together? "
EUNSEOK's eyebrow raised in interest as he averts his gaze from the book to listen to you for the second time.
his eyes stare at yours— his very beautiful doe eyes. "i- i mean, i was actually looking for a movie to watch but i couldn't find any so i was just wondering if you could help me find one. " you stutter, your confidence crumbling down all over what, his eyes?
"sure, what do you want to watch? " EUNSEOK leans over towards your seat to see your screen clearly as you browse through the numerous lists of movies.
EUNSEOK scans the lists to look for a movie he might be interested in. it doesn't take long for him to find something that suits his taste.
a brown coloured poster decorated with the face of an old man, 'EINSTEIN' written clearly on top of the poster in a huge font for an easy read.
if there is an advantage of being your number 1 hater is that he knows and remembers the most useless thing about you— one of them being your absolute hatred towards physics.
what about him? oh darling, after losing to you in a mathematics competition, he makes it his new life goal to be better than you in physics.
that's it, this is it.
if you guys watch the movie, you're going to be bored out of your life. and when that happens, he's going to tell you all about einstein and his life achievements which will make you realise that he's better than you in one aspect of life—
"legally blonde! " his train of thoughts is cut off by your screech. you turn your head towards him, your eyes sparkling in excitement as your right hand grab his left one, squeezing tightly, "can we watch legally blonde, pretty please? "
"sure. " EUNSEOK says hesitantly, his eyes blinking in disbelief. 
no words can explain the things happening in EUNSEOK's head. his eyes differ from the screen, the amount of pink coloured things and ambience in the movie slowly giving him a headache.
hot pinks, especially.
it has been a few minutes since the movie started and he still cant understand what you see in this movie aside from a stupid blonde sorority girl who's a regular at this one beauty salon.
it doesn't help that you're also watching it with a small smile dancing on your lips. you're happy and enjoying yourself, and he hates to see that.
or maybe the both of you just fail to see things eye to eye.
EUNSEOK's eyes drop, lids feeling heavy the longer he lose focus and interest towards the movie. with each seconds that passes by, EUNSEOK can feel his body starting to shift into another dimension until—
"so you're breaking up with me because i'm too blonde? "
EUNSEOK swear to himself that he will not enjoy the movie, he make sure not to enjoy the movie. but somehow hearing the very same line he's been listening to on his tiktok fyp for the past few years pique his interest.
"so this is where the sound came from. i thought it was a meme this whole time! " he whispers to himself.
"it's intriguing, isn't it? " okay maybe he wasn't whispering.
you giggle at EUNSEOK's newfound interest in the movie. you would be lying if you are to say that you haven't realised how bored EUNSEOK was throughout the whole movie— given it is only a few minutes in— so unsurprisingly, you're shocked that all it takes to gain his attention is this particular line.
"you know, " you say, popping in a cashew in your mouth from the packet of salted nuts you asked the flight attendance for not too long ago. "if you really want to find out where more famous tiktok audios came from, we can binge watch a lot of 2000s movies— teen romance, of course. "
"wouldn't it take too much time! " EUNSEOK try reasoning out, not wanting to admit how he's actually considering your offer.
"well as if the duration of our flight isn't nearly ten hours. "
and that is how your plan of sleeping throughout the whole plane ride gets thrown out the window. movies after movies, more iconic line after iconic lines. you genuinely feel like this is the first time you and EUNSEOK are very comfortable with each other.
EUNSEOK also thinks that he is having a lot of fun with you right now, something he didn't think is capable to happen within his hatred towards you.
maybe, just maybe, he doesn't really hate you that much anymore.
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TAGLIST (closed) : @ujisworld @leileixq @renjunsversion @marshwatz @onlyhyunjin @yipyipmorals @wonychu @renjuneoo @secretiny @haowonbins @https-yeonjun @vixensss @luffysgfforevaa1 @beomgyusonlywife @st4rryhae @woniepop @gisellessgf @yningz @jeeluv @billiondollarworth @keilovr @nyiaswrld @meowbini @asahilvr @brachioswrld @chuutaroo @sinsgaybutthatsokay @sokkszn @samvagejkflxhrt @itsactuallylina @injunnie-lemon @icewons @fae-renjun @nujeskz @wantluv @lilyluvszb1 @addorations @lotties-readings @sanasour @dutifullyannoyingfox @haechansbbg @woongiez @kaelysian @niinaspeaks @en-verse @yyangj3lly @ffixtionista @astro-doll-the-star @mizuhasgurl @lovaeri
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bouquetface · 3 months
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Tarot: You vs Their Ex
Not every reading you come across will be for you. I will not try to appeal to everyone. It will be specific as I can be.
Just providing an honest read of what I see. Take it as entertainment.
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One.
There is a person in their past that was very egotistical. They were very high maintenance. Your person may have felt nothing they did was good enough for this person. It didn’t matter what they did. This person can find the fault in anything. If the ex didn’t do it themselves, it can’t be correct.
In this relationship, your person turned a blind eye for the sake of making things work. They are a committed and loyal person. The relationship failing would make them feel like they’re a failure.
What draws them to you is your intelligence. Unlike their ex, you seem to have a higher intelligence. It could be you’re highly educated, you’re street smart and/or you have high emotional intelligence. You look at both sides of a problem before making a decision. You are more clam and rational thinking.
Their ex was on the immature side. Your person had to deal with them in the same manner one handles a spoiled child. They were very demanding of your partner but had little to offer themselves. It’s not that the ex is a bad person. I feel like the ex probably struggles with being single. They don’t really know how to do a lot of life stuff themselves. They require someone else to do it for them. If they want a long lasting relationship, they have a lot of maturing to do.
I believe this ex moved on fast from the relationship. This may have initially hurt your person. When they meet you, they will be fully over it. It seems after the breakup, they took time to build themselves back up. They’re a very hardworking person. Probably focused on career and their own family.
In your relationship, it will feel freeing. Finally, two adults who act like adults. Now, they can breathe and relax. It feels like a true partnership. No one feels burdened with anything. You both support each other. Your person is willing to do anything to assure you’re safe and comfortable.
They can spoil you without feeling used. Protecting you feels like protecting a Queen. Whereas, with the ex it felt like supervising a child. You don’t drain them, you provide them with motivation and support. You take care of them too. They will feel so grateful for you. And they will make sure you can feel their love and appreciation. They seem very romantic like leaving notes, remembering your drink order, etc.
You are both deeply loyal. Your person may have prominent scorpio & leo placements. Fixed sign energy. When you pair this loyalty with the ability to communicate/problem solve, you have a forever relationship. Locked in for life. 🔒 Meanwhile, I feel like the ex, although she moved on fast, struggles to maintain a longer relationship. But she isn’t a concern in your relationship.
Two.
Your person’s ex is truly terrible. And I don’t say this to make you feel better in comparison. She did not have good intentions with your person. Your person may have some status or power in their life. She was after it.
I won’t lie she is likely very attractive. However, she needs to realize everyone’s looks fade with age. Under that mask, she has very little good to offer. She is not who she presented herself to be to your person. When they found out who she truly is, they felt trap.
When your person first tried to break it off with her. She told a lie that made her appear as “in need”. Your person would be an asshole if they didn’t stay with her. This lie will differ from reader to reader. But a strong example for one of you is, this woman lied about a pregnancy. Absolute crazy shit.
For others of you, she’d lie & manipulate until your person felt obligated to stick with her. It was a terrible situation for them. They’d like to believe her lies but her actions would prove she isn’t the one for them.
When they finally broke it off with her, I feel their friends & family were so happy. Might’ve been lowkey celebrating. They did not like this woman.
She is relentless, though. I feel even when you and your person get together, she’s stalking your accounts. Unfortunately, she probably will be gossiping - making fun of his “new girl”. I know this isn’t going to sound good. And if it were me, I know I’d feel really bad about this. However, I feel like your person is definitely worth it. There’s a reason this ex is so obsessed with him. He truly seems to have it all. Like the exact kind of person you’re manifesting. He’s a wish come true.
For him, you are the wish come true. He has all eyes on you. He’ll want to take you everywhere. You’ll likely quickly begin to share a friend group. I see lots of celebration. Might be birthdays or parties in general. You two are just having the time of your life. And I think this is part of the reason why that ex is so bitter. She’ll see all these fun & romantic photos on socials and it’ll make her FURIOUS. Mutual friends, his friends may even post something. It’ll make her very jealous because no one did that for her. Like I said before, his friends & family did not like her. But when they get to know you, they’re accepting you with open arms.
You guys could even be travelling early on. Road trip or a full vacation. There is prefect harmony between you and your person. Your fights are more teasing & create more passion. You add fuel to their fire. Unlike their draining ex, that seemed to be after them for the wrong reasons.
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starlightrosa · 2 months
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Battleships
Summary: Charlie and Angel are playing a game of Battleships. But not with pen and paper. More like marker pens, and ticklish backs as their papers. Just so happens that these ticklish backs are property of Lucifer and Alastor.
Word Count: 2.3k
Warnings: Tickling, swearing, Angel Dust's unique humour, a bit of depressing talk concerning Alastor's mum (Alastor do be a mama's boy and he big sad) but mostly fluff <3
Enjoy!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Another day in the Hazbin Hotel, and there was a very obvious mood of mischief. Ticklish mischief, to put it much more obviously. There seemed to be tickle fights breaking out every hour between Charlie and Vaggie, Niffty was running round and tormenting whichever unlucky soul was within reach with her feather duster, and even Husk was sneaking in a few underarm tickles whenever Angel Dust was too close to the bar.
It was driving two certain people in the hotel up the wall, but for two very different reasons.
Lucifer was one of the affected. He had woken up craving to be held. Or cuddled. Or tickled. Hell, the king had no idea what he wanted relating to specifics. But damn it, if he didn’t get some form of human touch in the next three minutes, then the world was going to end.
Alastor was the second affected by the ticklish mischief ravaging the halls of this rinky-dink hotel. But Alastor thought this playtime was silly. It’s Hell, who spends their afterlife trying to tickle someone else, where every day was utter torment and suffering punctuated by the wails of the eternally damned and the screams of tortured souls? That was a background noise Alastor preferred, to see lost souls drown in an ocean of failure.
But the radio demon could not dwell on his preferences. He would be busy soon, for that charming Charlie had planned a little board game tournament of sorts in an effort to build trust among the hotel patrons. A silly idea, but Alastor didn’t think there was any benefit to crushing the princess’s feelings, so he kept schtum for now.
The crazy tickling vibes from earlier seemed to have petered out. Yet in the hotel’s lobby, Angel Dust and Charlie were locked in a fierce game of something Charlie called ‘Battleship’. Their hastily drawn paper grids and pencils lay in wait, the pencils pointed at each other like military-grade weapons.
“E6.” came Charlie’s voice. Angel laughed, picking up a blue marker and putting a big ‘X’ on that coordinate.
“Missed again, twinkletoes.” Angel crowed.
“Shit. Your go.” Charlie said, waiting for Angel’s guess. The alluring arachnid sinner thought for a bit, before making his guess.
“A4.” Angel guessed. And if the loud groan from Charlie hinted anything, seems Angel had scored a point, or did something right. Alastor wasn’t quite sure how this game worked.
“Ugh, fuck! Hit.” Charlie groaned, picking up a red marker and blotting it with a crimson ‘X’. Angel pumped one of his many fists in the air, no doubt in a victorious manner, or for a quick bragging right. One of the two.
“Hot damn. I am unbeatable at this game!” the spider crowed, looking much too pleased with himself. Alastor rather thought that this game, while simple, did indeed look a bit fun. Not as fun as actually destroying something, but… close enough. And it wasn’t just the radio demon who had heard this game. Lucifer knew what Battleship was. But he didn’t dare come down, for fear of making his obvious lee mood even more obvious, and the markers Charlie and Angel were both using was sure to drive Lucifer crazy with want.
But the princess and spider sinner had seen the way both had been acting. Lucifer’s shaky and nervous demeanour, compared with Alastor trying to be aloof and uncaring like always in an effort to mask his curiosity at the game they were playing was a rather funny thing to see indeed. And Charlie made this known to Angel, with both setting up for their next game, fresh sheets of paper and newly sharpened pencils at the ready for their grids.
“We should get my dad and Alastor in on this game, Angel. I think they’d enjoy it.” Charlie whispered quietly, the princess barely masking a smile of her own. She wasn’t stupid; she knew the tells of her father in a lee mood, namely because she did mostly the same thing when she was in one herself, from the nervous glances at wiggling hands to refusing to look at anything that could even be vaguely considered as a tickle tool.
“Oh yeah? Good idea, Princess. Your dad would go for it, but how the hell are we going to get Alastor in? Does he even know this game?” Angel asked.
“I think Vaggie and me having all those tickle fights has… kind of made my dad want something similar, if he hasn’t been wanting to be tickled since he woke up. Alastor is always smiling, but he needs a genuine smile. So here’s my plan…” the princess said, highlighting the fun parts, while Angel listened carefully.
“We’re gonna make them our game boards. You and me, Battleships. Red marks for hit, blue marks for miss. I know my dad has a ticklish back. I don’t know for Alastor. I know he’s ticklish, but he would never say where. So let’s have some fun with this.” Charlie giggled. Angel had a hint of mischief in his own mismatched eyes. This was going to be entertaining.
Late afternoon soon gave way to evening, and as the moon came up into the crimson sky of Pride, the pentagram sun descending down for another day’s end, Alastor and Lucifer finally came into the hotel’s game room, seeing paper and pens dotted about. Alastor sent a barely disguised joyful look at Lucifer’s muffled whine, seeing so many markers strewn over the room.
“Ah! There you guys are. We’re just about to get started. Me and Angel are gonna play Battleships.” Charlie explained, gesturing to them both to sit on the floor, which both men did happily. Lucifer watched Charlie draw her grid, while Alastor was on Team Angel, watching the spider scribble his own grid.
“Why do we need to be witnesses for this? This seems just like a two-player duel.” Alastor pointed out. His question did have merit, and Charlie barely concealed a laugh as she quickly screwed her paper up and tackled Lucifer to the floor. Before Alastor could even laugh at the daughter of the king taking down the monarch so fucking easily, a similar weight slammed into the radio demon’s own back. Alastor gasped and fell forward, twisting his head quickly to see what the fuck had happened, only to see Angel’s grinning face above him. Oh, those cheeky little shits.
“Angel, what is the meaning of this?!” Alastor demanded, doing his best to wriggle. But his demands were silenced, because with a brisk snap of Charlie’s slender fingers, golden rope twisted gently around Alastor and Lucifer’s wrists, tugging both pairs of hands up and out of the way.
“Sorry, Smiles. Me and Princess Charlie are gonna play our game of Battleship. You and FancyPants over there get to be our game boards, so yay for you guys~!” Angel explained, a wide smirk on the spider’s features as he took a seat on the back of Alastor’s thighs, Charlie doing the same with her father.
Both Charlie and Angel worked to quickly pull the jacket off each of them, and rolled their shirts up, exposing the skin underneath. Lucifer’s porcelain-white back awaited Charlie, the king already shivering with barely-repressed laughter, and Alastor’s scarred back was presented to Angel.
So many scars, hot damn. Angel traced a couple of the thicker ones absentmindedly, to a choked back snort from Alastor. Well, this was not how the Radio Demon expected the night to go. One could definitely confirm that this was NOT on the bingo card.
“Hah, ya sound like Fat Nuggets.” Angel teased, referencing his beloved pet pig, smirking down at Alastor.
“Oh shut up- Mmph!” Alastor began to demand, but he snapped his mouth shut as he felt the cold tip of a marker gently trace on his back. From what he could feel, Angel seemed to be drawing a grid of sorts. Charlie seemed to be doing the same, and judging from the noises opposite, Lucifer was already giggling and doing his best not to squirm.
“Oh, you got a ticklish back, do ya Smiley? Shit, how the hell are you gonna last this game?” Angel laughed.
“I ahaham gohoing to dehestroy yohohou ahand thehen-!” Alastor threatened, but his threat was cut off by a shrill squeal from Lucifer, and then rapid pounding as the king’s boots hit the floor rapidly, the king giggling freely. Alastor knew his back to be fairly ticklish, but by the sounds of it, Lucifer’s had to be far worse. The thought of that almost made him feel bad for the king. Almost.
Charlie and Angel rested their markers down on each side of their ‘game boards’. Red and blue, one on each side. Both Lucifer and Alastor’s backs were drawn on to mimic a Battleships grid, from letters A to J, and numbers 1 to 10.
“You’re goin’ down, princess.” Angel laughed. Charlie sent a mischief-laced smile back his way to the spider sinner.
“In your dreams, Dust.”
And with the fighting words out of the way, the game officially began. Charlie had the first call, at Angel’s insistence. Or as Angel put it, “Ladies first and all that shit.”
“C3.”
Angel located the spot – at the top left side of Alastor’s back. He poked softly, and pinched a few times. No reaction from the Radio Demon, not even a wobbling smirk. With a disappointed tut, he picked his blue marker and drew an ‘X’ into that spot on Alastor’s back.
“Miss. In return… F2.”
Charlie nodded, finding that spot – top middle of her father’s back, at the top of his spine. She pinched that spot and poked softly. Lucifer gasped and broke into squeaky giggles. Because his hands were tied up, as were Alastor’s, the king nor the radio demon could even dream of moving.
“Hit! Nice, Angel.” Charlie smiled, picking up her red marker and drawing a red ‘X’ into that spot. “My go. Umm… I’ll say H9.”
Angel nodded and looked down at Alastor, noticing the eternal smile now had some kind of nervous look to it. Angel pinched at the annotated spot on Alastor’s back, enjoying the radio demon struggle under the spider.
“Damn, nice shot Princess!” Angel laughed. “Looks like he’s ticklish as fuck here.”
“Angel, I’ll kihihill yohoHOU! Stohohohahap ihihit!” Alastor tittered, squirming side to side. Angel Dust couldn’t help but laugh, grabbing the scruff of Alastor’s collared shirt to avoid being tossed off.
“Jesus, it’s like I’m on one of those bucking bulls in the bars downtown.” Angel joked, steadying himself atop Alastor’s back with a few ruthless side squeezes before the demon could get a chance to throw him off.
“AH! Ahahangel, I’m gohohoing to rihihip yohohour tongue ohohout!”
“Stop laughing first, Smiles.” Angel shot back. “Oh wait. Ya can’t, cause you’re too ticklish~!”
“Alastor, you aren’t in a position to make threats anyway.” Charlie teased, as she awaited Angel’s next guess.
“Let’s go for D1.” the spider guessed. Charlie found the spot quite easily, anyway, unleashing another series of quick fire pokes. Sadly, nothing from Lucifer despite the huge lee mood that plagued the king.
“A-Ah… oh good, I’m okay.” Lucifer whispered, shoving down his smile.
“Missed, Angel.” Charlie said.
“Ah, fuck. Well, if I missed him, I gotta kiss him. Pucker up, Daddy Morningstar~” Angel joked, enjoying Alastor’s muffled snickering and Lucifer’s panicked babbling at that idea.
“I don’t think my mother would appreciate that, Angel.” Charlie laughed, the melody of laughter in the room bringing a huge smile to her face. It was nice to see everyone enjoy themselves. “My go. So let’s try one spot up. H8.”
“Real original.” Angel joked with a playful eye-roll, even as he moved one square up and pinched and poked that spot on Alastor’s back. Alastor couldn’t help it, and a deer’s squeaking noise left his mouth.
“Nice, Charlie. Hit!” Angel announced, drawing a red ‘X’ into that spot on Alastor’s back, which Alastor would argue tickled more than the actual poking bit itself. And the fact that Angel was very slow in drawing the crosses themselves just made everything that much more maddening.
Lucifer and Alastor would never admit it, but both men were actually having some semblance of fun. Lucifer was happy his daughter involved him in this game, even if it was at his expense.
Alastor did enjoy the fun and mischief this place offered. In a way, this was probably something his mother would have done, had they both been still alive. Alastor’s heart ached painfully at the thought she was in Heaven and he couldn’t see her, or talk to her, or to be held in her arms a final time.
By the time this fierce round of Battleships ended, both Lucifer and Alastor’s backs were covered in a plethora of red and blue crosses. Alastor had red dotting both his top and lower back, and blue in the middle.
Lucifer had many more red crosses, and only a smattering of blue marks over his obviously very ticklish back. Both men were panting slightly by the time the game was finally over.
���Well, this was fun.” Charlie smiled. Angel nodded.
“Aw hell yeah, toots. We have to do this again.” Angel smiled.
Alastor was quick to loudly protest. “NO!! Not again, I forbid it and-!”
But a series of skittering fingers along his upper back shut the radio demon down quickly, and Alastor was floored, his normally reserved laughter giving way to squeaky giggling. Oddly adorable.
“Round two, Angel~?” Charlie asked with a smirk. Angel’s mischievous grin clawed its way back onto his face.
“You read my mind, Princess.” Angel responded sweetly, both princess and sinner looking at Lucifer and Alastor with a shared evil grin. And after the necessary cleaning time to wipe the grid off Lucifer and Alastor’s backs (only for the grid to be drawn back on each of them) the laughter from the hotel carried on well into the wee hours of the morning, the battleship duels between Charlie and Angel Dust raging on.
The End!
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