#i gotta Think about em. real hard.

[felicitywilds]

nine is just so besotted with rose he cant even pretend to be annoyed at her for more than a second. she struggles to pronounce raxacoricofallapatorius and at first hes like “🙄🙄🙄” and shes like “no hang on!” and then as she starts getting the hang of it his attitude pivots so quickly. he breaks out into the dopiest smile and she jumps into his arms and they hug and he swings her around and they’re so giddy and he’s so proud of her for such a tiny, silly reason. made for each other behavior.

[gl1tteryzebra]

hey gorgeous 🙈 I feel like rafe is such a gym bro and he would definitely mansplain like how to grow his glutes or something idc about lol and reader’s just giggling and nodding along blushing bc he’s flexing his muscles and pointing to which ones he needs to ‘work’ on 😵‍💫😵‍💫😵‍💫😵‍💫😵‍💫😵‍💫

hiiii my queen 😋 your brain needs to be studied cos ur such a genius for this…

"so you wanna make sure your weight sits back on your hips…”

despite the fact that you were nodding along enthusiastically to rafe’s instructions, you couldn’t prevent your mind from drifting elsewhere like some unleashed puppy— chasing after whatever shiny object piqued your interest.

the green muscle shirt clung deliciously to his chest; pumped muscles flattered by the tight material. your gaze fixated on every ridge and bulging vein that was accentuated. a small giggle slipping past your glossed lips as his pecs squeezed together at the top of the motion— only then did his blue orbs met yours in the mirror.

"hey...hey, you listening, kid?" he released the barbell with a huff, a sweaty palm tapping the fat of your cheeks. “this shit’s important.”

"I am listening,” you whined with an unconvincing pout, eyelashes batting up at him as you gestured to his exposed arms. “what ‘bout these ones? they’re are so big.”

“huh—oh my biceps, you like ‘em?” his lips stretched into a haughty smirk as your fingers experimentally dragged over the flexed muscle, softened features contouring into fascination as they hardened beneath your touch. “wanna see how I work ‘em?”

“uh-huh!”

the gym was fairly desolate at this time of night meaning you could sit on one of the empty benches as rafe stood before you, biceps expanding as he curled the dumbbell to his chest. you nibbled on your bottom lip, squirming in your seat; with each repetition his breath came out in a laboured grunt, face twisting into a pained grimace. you couldn’t help it, attention drifting to earlier this morning when he’d held his weight above you, hips ploughing into your own with an ardent passion. heat blossomed beneath your cheeks at the memory and you fidgeted with the sleeve of rafe’s hoodie to distract yourself.

“last one,” he groaned, arm shaking as he completed his final rep. “ten.”

“wowww, good job, rafe! you’re so strong.” you sprung from your spot, entangling yourself with his dewy skin, leaning up to place a quick peck to the corner of his lips.

“yeah? you think? strong enough to do this…” his arms wrapped around your thighs, hoisting you into his embrace. an airy shriek floated from your chest as his lips attached to your neck, sucking hard.

“ah—no, stop—ha! that tickles…”

he chuckled into your skin, lowering your giggling frame back to the floor once he was satisfied. your fingers splayed across the expanse of his abdomen, absentmindedly kneading into the taut muscles.

“gotta work on my abs, they’re real pain in the ass to train,” you glanced up at that, lips dropping into a frown. “oh, I didn’t know that.”

“ha—yeah, I was thinkin’… maybe you could help me with that.”

sincerely ~ 🦓༝༚༝༚

[canon-gabriel-quotes]

Transcript -

Gabriel : *heavy breathing and grunting* Bastard. 

Useless bucket of bolts. Yeah, you better run!

Load back to your- Ah shit, that was hard. Load back to your little checkpoint.

Yeah, go ahead. Go P rank the other levels. 

Oh… I’m sorry. Can-can-can I? Excuse me, can I help you?

Columbo : Oh, uh, hi there. Sorry, I didn’t mean to interrupt.

Uh, I’m looking for somebody. 

Uh, Gabriel is it? Is that you? Is that who I’m lookin for?

Listen, I just gotta say, you did an amazing job uh… Fighting off that uh. 

What’d ya-what’d ya call it?

Uh, you called it a… 

Gabriel : A mere object?

Columbo : That’s right. A mere object. 

Phenomenal work. 

I gotta tell ya. Robots, I don’t trust em myself. 

Ya know, I had-I had this one episode where uh, there was this robot named Rob and uh-

Gabriel : Uh, yes. 

That’s very fascinating, but could you perhaps get on with your introduction? 

Columbo : Uh, certainly. So I’m, uh, I’m lieutenant Columbo. Uh, I’m with the LAPD. Uh, I'm in the homicide department. 

Gabriel : Homicide? You can’t kill a machine. 

Columbo : No no no! Of course not. But um… Well… Ya can certainly love one.

Gabriel : D-d-d-detective I- I don’t- I don’t know what you’re implying there with that statement!

As you can tell I… Despise machines and wouldn’t think about doing so- Loving them, I mean.

Columbo : Yes, of course uh. Absolutely, it’s completely unthinkable. 

Except, well. While I was- while I was over here and I opened this door and uh fourteen- fourteen V1 body pillows fell out. Along with a buncha the plushies. 

Uh, and I just can’t imagine how ya- how ya happened upon something like that by accident.

It’s a little ridiculous! Uh, frankly.

Gabriel : Uh, no no no, listen.  

Detective. I can explain, okay? 

Those belong to- uh! That guy over there! 

*Filth-like scream*

Gabriel : Yeah! A real freak! 

Some kinda pervert. I don’t know why we keep him around.

But uh, I-I have nothing to do with it. 

Columbo : Well, ya see, I would believe- I would believe that, but uh. 

It’s just that- Well we had the boys at the lab run these pillows and we found your cum- We found your DNA all over em, uh.

You’re-You’re under arrest, I’m killing you.

Gabriel : K-hah. Kill me? *laughs*

Oh detective. 

Columbo : Oh. Aw fuck.

Gabriel : I’m afraid you’ve made a grave mistake. 

Because, in fact… What is going to happen instead…

Is actually what I’m gonna- AHHHG MOTHERFUCKER

I’LL FUCKIN KILL YOU

SON OF A BITCH 

AHHG YOU BASTARD

I’LL RIP YOU APART 

PIECE OF SHIT

YOU FUCK

ASSHOLE

BITCH

*Grunting* 

Oh Shit. 

Oh. What have I done? 

V1 : Bro, tell me you didn’t just kill a fucking cop.

Gabriel : The law will be here any second now… 

Machine, flush the drugs.

V1 : No way, bro. Let’s smoke that.

Gabriel : All of it?!?

Hm… One last ride…

Well, alright.

*coughing his lungs out*

V1 : No Gabriel, holding it in doesn’t do anything!

*Gabriel continues to cough his lungs out*

End of transcription

Audio source part 1

Audio source part 2

[ew-selfish-art]

DP x DC AU: Danny desperately wants to find the explosion guy. Tim is really good at covering his tracks... he didn't account for ghosts.

The explosions make it onto TV as purported terror activity and most people haven't heard of that part of the world much less ever given a second thought to care about it. The only real reason it gets reported on has something to do with the Justice League and... Danny knows too much.

He's been in training for Clockwork's court (which he's suspicious of- feels like kingly duty bullshit- but Danny is playing along out of curiosity for now) and he's learned a lot about how the living and non-living worlds collide. That means learning about CW's usual suspects- one of which just happened to have a ton of bases around the area Danny was seeing on the news.

It didn't take long for Danny to try to piece together that whoever blew up Nanda Parbat was trying to fuck with the League of Shadows, and was doing it successfully. Less green portals in the world the better, same goes for assassins. But it gets Danny thinking... Maybe he can employ similar tactics on the GIW Bases that keep spawning on the edges of Amity Park. It would at least set them back while he and his friends navigated the help line desk to request Justice League intervention. None of them can leave Amity Park, so outreach is going to have to be creative.

So Danny figures he'll just find the guy. Call up some ghosts who were there, or er, came from there and get a profile and track him down. But the ghosts keep saying it was The Detective. Annoying!

Danny goes full conspiracy theory, gets Tucker and Sam involved, and begrudgingly asks Wes Weston his thoughts.

He hadn't expected Wes to garble out a thirty minute presentation (that had 100 more slides left to go before he cut it off) about how Batman totally trained with a cult and so did his kids. Danny kind of rolled his eyes but... hey, new avenue of searching in the Infinite Realms at least.

The ghosts confirm that Bombs is for sure not Batman's MO- But maybe his second kid would know? The second kid was already brought back to life though, so no way to easily reach him... Danny starts to realize that this might be the work of a Robin now. Wasn't the red one known for solving cold cases? (Sam provides this information- its a social faux pas to not know hero gossip at Gotham Galas- everything she's learned is against her will).

It all comes to a head when Danny goes about the hard task of opening a portal for the guy to come through at just the right time, explain the infinite realms so he doesn't panic and then describe what the fuck was going on with the GIW. It takes months, just over a full year, of random (educated guesses) portal generating- Finally, Red Robin drops into the land of the dead.

"So, you're the guy I've got to talk to about explosions right?" Danny enthusiastically asks.

Tim thinks he's died and landed in the after life following 56 hours of being awake and plummeting off the side of a building into a Lazarus pool. Nothing makes sense about the kid in front of him.

"Yeah, I got a guy for munitions." Tim answers cooly.

"How do you feel about secretly sanctioned government operations that violate protected rights?"

"Gotta get rid of 'em some how. Need me to point you in the right direction?" This might as well be happening.

[mysteryshoptls]

R Ace Trappola - Luxe Couture Voice Lines

Summon Line: Think people'll mistake me for a celeb or an actor if I walk around town wearin' this getup? ...Hey, why's that makin' you laugh?

Groooovy!!: When the live-action Beautiful Queen comes out to the public, let's totally go watch it again.

Home: Bein' in this super nice outfit's pretty nerve-wracking...

Home Idle 1: Man, high-brand clothes like this really are cool, huh～ One day, I'd love to walk into a store and say something like, "I'll take every outfit on this shelf!"

Home Idle 2: Azul-senpai's real meticulous, huh. He's buyin' a ton of souvenirs to give to people he wants to make connections with.

Home Idle 3: It's actually pretty hard to figure out how much makeup to use. Once, when I tried drawin' on my eyebrows while watching a how-to video, I made 'em way too thick and it looked pretty dumb...

Home Idle - Login: I thought I'd be super nervous hangin' out at a film fest with a ton of celebrities, but seein' my upperclassmen being their usual selves has kinda helped me calm down a bit.

Home Tap 1: Whenever Vil-senpai walks into a shop, all the manager tier folk just flock to greet him in a tizzy. That's a super popular influencer for ya!

Home Tap 2: I got this accessory thanks to Jamil-senpai's recommendation. It was a little cheap, but it's properly 925-stamped silver. Heh, I got something good.

Home Tap 3: Brand-name products are pretty awesome, but cosmetics get used up quick, right? So when it comes to that, I think I'm good with the cheap stuff.

Home Tap 4: I'm totally gonna brag about this high-brand couture fit forever! Gotta make sure to take care of it so it doesn't get dirty.

Home Tap 5: The hotel that the film studio set us up in was crazy gorgeous and amazing. This has been the experience of a lifetime!

Requested by Anonymous.

[ashipiko]

—NIKO CIMARRON

All information on Niko Cimarron ATM! Will most likely be updated ☆

—MORE UNDER CUT

BASIC INFORMATION:

Class: 2-A

Birthday: October 24

Height: 176cm

Dominant Hand: Right

From: Land of Pyroxene / Shaftlands

Club: Film Studies (visits on occasion, inactive member)

Favorite Subject: Magic Analysis

Best Subject: Animal Languages

Likes: Making a profit

Dislikes: Getting outsmarted

Favorite Food: Berries / Berry flavored things

Least Favorite Food: Anything too hot

Specialty: Balancing on the line of lie and truth

GALLERY:

VOICE CLAIM:

YUU’S INTERVIEW:

— Scarabia Dorms - Niko’s Room —

for easier reading, all yuu dialogue will be in italics and all niko dialogue will be in a normal black font instead of green.

There you are. Surprised you came to visit me, Carrots.

> You know what I’m here for, Niko.

> Why are you surprised?

No need to act like that. Interview, right? Or should I say an interrogation? If you wanted to hang out with me, you didn’t need to hide around the bush, you know…

It’s cute seeing you all dodgy, but still. ♡

> I think it matches your vibe.

> You’re one to talk.

Yeah, yeah. How many questions do we have planned for today? Don’t take too long, now. I’ve gotta start pumping out those treats for my profit.

…Oh. No need to worry about a pen and paper, I’ve got one for you.

> I didn’t expect for you to be so prepared.

> (…They’re cuter than expected.)

Something something about matching the vibes… They’re modeled after an old movie about cops and so, interrogating. Figured you’d like them. A carrot for Carrots. It’s cute.

It’s about time to start though, huh?

> Yeah.

> No more wasting time.

INTERVIEW: START!

1. Can we get some basic info about you from… you?

A second year Scarabia student who’s a fox beastman. I guess I’m what you’d call a charmer, thief of the heart, man of your dreams… I’ve heard it all. But the real name’s Niko. Niko Cimarron. My surname means “Wild”, so you could call me Mr. Wild if you like that too. Heh, actually, it’s a business thing, so I guess you’d only call me that if you bought my products… Say, Carrots, you feeling like you need a snack? I have some lefties if you’d like.

> No thanks.

> Why not?

They’re tasty, I prommie~.

2. Speaking of which, what are your “pawpsicles” made from? How do you make them?

Those little things? Why, I’ll let you know I put my blood, sweat, and tears in those treats. Makes me happy to see other people happy, like the faces on a thaumark. To make ‘em, it’s just some tasty berries from the school grounds that get mushed up to get juice, where they go into a mold and freeze up. It’s hard work! I’ve gotta walk so many steps around the school and all across campus… You’re lucky you never saw me in my first year. Took me a while to get used to the schedule… Though, I’m a well-organized man now, I’ll have you know. It’s good for the public image.

3. You’re from the Shaftlands, aren’t you? Do you have any connections to Vil, Cater, or Jack?

Connections? I have them with everyone, really… though I don’t think those three are really aware I came from the same place as them. To be fair, the Shaftlands is a pretty big area. People even go as far to call it a utopia.

If anything, I’ve talked to Diamond more at NRC than anywhere in the Shaftlands. Is that because I never even saw him once? Maybe. So I can’t say about back then, but I can enjoy a good conversation with him now. He’s a good customer and a good influencer. Back then, he got me a good chunk of costumers off of a Magicam post, so I’ve got to give it to him. Who knew people could just follow trendy things at the drop of a hat? Crazy, right?

Vil is a major celebrity, and Jack, I didn’t even know existed ‘till this year. I’ve got nothing to say about Mr. Hardhead, but I’ve had my fair share of talks with Vil. When we were kids, I got a wave from him once… It was great bragging rights. Heh, he kinda freaks me out now though. The reason why I don’t actually participate in club activities. He’s probably too high of a standard for a lowlife like me, so it’s not something that bothers me anyway.

4. You don’t seem to have a Unique Magic. Any reason why?

Ah. Magic? A little bit of a sour topic for me, Carrots, ow… I’m just a late bloomer, is all. I’ve got magic in me, but I never played around with it when I was younger, so I’m way more rusty than all of the other guys here. It doesn’t mean I don’t know the brain stuff, though. Just inexperienced.

If I’m being dead honest, it’s kind of a miracle how I got into NRC. I guess they wanted the fox vote, huh? Heh.

5. Not sure if I’ve seen you around a lot with one particular person. Is there a secret someone?

Secret someone? Getting jealous, are you? Haha, I would’ve never taken you to be the type!

> Not the focus of the question.

> That’s not…!

It’s your fault for wording it like that. You’ve got to watch your words, Carrots. Well, the business life is a cold one, isn’t it? Being around a bunch of highschool guys isn’t really the “ideal” grounds for making business partners either, so it is what it is. At least this way, I get all the profits, so I don’t mind. If you want, I can save a spot for you by my side. ♡

> Again, no thanks.

> Maybe after I get a break from all the things this school brings.

Keep me in mind~.

6. Our last question. You say a lot of random stuff. People get annoyed with it pretty often. How do you feel about that?

…? Oh, you picked up on it, huh? Heh, I mean… I guess I could come clean. I think it’s interesting you haven’t walked away from me yet, y’know. Usually people aren’t into this stuff.

> You are annoying, but…

> (Would it be mean to say something?)

I appreciate you, Carrots. A little too much than I’d like.

Usually people don’t really like the stereotypical foxiness I bring to the table. They run away because I’m either something they don’t wanna get mixed up with, or just something they don’t like. I think you’re a weirdo who’s looking for entertainment when you come into my room and talk to me like this.

…But I guess that just means that you like the way I talk to you, right? You can’t get enough? Is that what’s happening here? ♡

> For a second, I thought you were going to need some comfort, but I guess not.

> Really, it’s fine, Niko…

Don’t pretend like your cheeks aren’t a little red. I like the reactions I get out of you. ♡

Is that all you wanted? Yeah? Alright, we’re done here, then. Hand me the pen, would ya?

> It was nice being able to talk to you like this.

> (That was a quick turnaround.)

…Yeah. Hurry on up, shouldn’t you be studying up on actual things worth studying? Live up to that Smarty McSmart Pants title. Bye-bye now~.

INTERVIEW: END!

> (I feel like Niko’s more than meets the eye.)

> (I feel like Niko’s… hiding something.)

.

.

.

TRIVIA:

Niko is actually magicless. Not entirely, as he does have some running in his blood, so he didn’t lie, but it’s not enough where he can successfully conjure spells. Because of this, at NRC, he often has to get by with con-artist type excuses and acts. It works most of the time, as he has Crowley’s support. For now, he’s getting by with the excuse of being a late bloomer, but I’m sure suspicions are beginning to rise… Perhaps, if this were to be found out that he’s unable to conjure spells, he would be kicked out of NRC.

He made it to NRC after being dared to attempt to con his way in by his magicless best friend. His name is not noted, but he’s a very angry and violent French fennec fox. Niko is often bullied by him.

He can be considered a fan of Vil.

Niko enjoys the pop genre a lot, but is embarrassed to admit it.

Despite being a playboy, Niko is easily flustered at the thought of someone making moves on him.

Even though he doesn’t want to, he feels obligated to play into the deceitful foxiness of himself, because that’s what people naturally expect of him. It stops them from getting curious about him, as it seems like they’ve already got him figured out.

He says things that are considered shallow, like flirting or bargaining because he wants to get a reaction out of people. Niko does small things like this for small reactions — enough of these small reactions will fulfill the same satisfaction of seeing someone he loves flustered or happy, he thinks. In truth, he knows it won’t amount to much. Niko tries to satisfy himself enough so that he won’t need the real thing.

Niko feels very guilting for deceiving everyone at NRC, especially the prefect. Even still, he doesn’t have the heart to tell them that he truly doesn’t belong here, taking up a spot possibly for somebody who deserves it much more.

Niko’s way of thinking suggests that if he acts distasteful enough, it will cause people to stray far away from him. He believes that he really is just a lowlife fox, but the truth of his actions is something he think people would hate him for most; living in a lie. Because of this, he acts like a playboy and an annoyance in attempts to get people to stay away, preventing them from finding out the even uglier truth of him.

Additionally, he’s afraid to have the truth leak out because he doesn’t want to leave NRC. Though he doesn’t have much, he doesn’t want to lose the little bit he does have.

Even still, Niko craves for someone who will take time to understand him. Which is why he’s so attached to the prefect.

More to be added!

[stars-and-the-min]

☆ the wrong way to hard launch (6) | OP81

summary : oscar's girlfriend is a walking pr problem for literally everyone (including herself) social media au

pairing : oscar piastri x zhou!fem!singer!oc

a/n the highs (friends) and lows (exes) of life aka lina lore 👀 preface : i know nothing about nfl or american football so suspend ur beliefs if u happen to know a thing or two, also my amateur photoshopping skills are really improving from this

masterlist | last part | part 6 | next part

INSTAGRAM

logansargeant

liked by alex_albon and 142,394 others

logansargeant The long-awaited ultimate rematch tagged: selinabui and oscarpiastri

alex_albon Wait, why wasn't I invited?

selinabui ok captain america pack it up ↳ logansargeant @ selinabui Stay mad 😎 ↳ oscarpiastri @ selinabui Why would you challenge two professional racing drivers to a racing game? ↳ selinabui @ oscarpiastri i thought you loved me? ↳ oscarpiastri @ selinabui Ah but you love winners more 😏 ↳ logansargeant @ oscarpiastri Stop flirting in my comments???

cofrisy_f1 LOSCAR??? OSCALINA??? LOLINA???

beemiepie she chose the orange car 🥺🥺🥺 ↳ siera_mblanc @beemiepie a true papaya girlie 🧡🧡

cameliazzz just posted to their story

replies selinabui cami, did u or did u not insist u'd be fine 😭

lukaszhang the SLANDER??? didn't we have loads of fun???

aidan_ebass Touché Millie, see you soon?

eb_jonno sidenote: can you bring mochi on the plane? are there food restrictions?

oscarpiastri

liked by opeightyone and 121,983 others

oscarpiastri 次回まで trans: until next time

piastri_lina obsessed with this couple's dedication to never tagging each other

opeightyone Get 'em next year 💪

selinabui currently feeling like a 1930's housewife waiting for her husband to return from war ↳ cameliazzz @ selinabui HELLO NOT YOU PLAGARISING MY STORY??? FOR A GUY??? ↳ selinabui @ cameliazzz nooooo wifey i didn't mean like that :(((

TWITTER

lina !!! @EB_selina · 37m you've gotta be shitting me

NFL Jersey Numbers @nfljerseywatch · 1h Tennessee Titans RB Thomas Howard (@THowdy) is wearing number 24. Last worn by Kenny Vaccaro. #Titans

↳ kayla @luna_apocolypse · 34m no fucking way... i don't wanna jump to conclusions but... ↳ emme @flowersforcami · 32m he tweeted about it. girl- jump to those conclusions.

Thomas Howard @THowdy · 58m The move to the #Titans has been a huge change, and 24 has been a number close to my heart for many years, I'd consider it a lucky number for a lucky year 👊 ↳ liv is SEEING EB LIVE!! @olivielina · 23m eat shit and die i'm so fucking serious you have no right to wear her number ↳ kayla @luna_apocolypse · 22m hahaha (not) funny but april fools was last week say sike RIGHT NOW

fiona🩷 @fififorlina · 29m thinking about how tommy is playing with lina’s number i'm weak 😭 ↳ 🕯️manifesting EB3 🕯️@ linabelles · 13m no, we're absolutely not doing this, it's not sweet at all, do you even know how badly he treated lina? ↳ emme @flowersforcami · 11m there are tommy-supporting linami’s in this day and age???

oscalina real ?! @emptyginbottles · 39m lina watching her ex and cousin play/drive with her number be like:

↳ lila💚 @kasdanrights · 23m idk how to feel bc it's kinda hilarious that our little rockstar is slowly plaguing the sporting world with her number

lina !!! @EB_selina · 22m @LoganSargeant for my own mental health we're not going to talk for the next... 50 years ↳ Logan Sargeant @LoganSargeant · 8m I'm sorry? Did I do something wrong? ↳ lina !!! @EB_selina · 5m it's not you, it's just your countrymen (i'm generalising again)

MESSAGES

from the phone of selina bui

TWITTER

liv is SEEING EB LIVE!! @olivielina · 35m WHY IS EVERYONE FLOODING MY TL WITH T*MMY SHIT ↳ liv is SEEING EB LIVE!! @olivielina · 34m lina is one of the only music girlies who is SO SO SO vocal about how much she HATES her ex and you still can't listen to her??? ↳ liv is SEEING EB LIVE!! @olivielina · 34m not just with her music but as in SHE OUTRIGHT HATES HIS GUTS ON MAIN she COULD NOT possibly make it clearer that she would rather shoot herself in the head than ever consider getting back together with him ↳ liv is SEEING EB LIVE!! @olivielina · 33m i'm so tired can't you just let the woman be happy with oscar ↳ abby <3 @devilvows · 17m liv, baby, i think you need to change ur name to 'defense minister of linami nation'

INSTAGRAM

selinabui

liked by oscarpiastri and 139,204 others

selinabui some weird second string loser who's not worth mentioning

cameliazzz thought the message was 'let everyone know i'm doing ok'? ↳ selinabui @ cameliazzz message appropriately sent :)

oliviarodrigo AAHHH stunning as always 💝💝 ↳ selinabui @ oliviarodrigo watch out, the literal moment we're in the same city i'm hunting u down (my favourite american 🥺)

oscarpiastri Haha not me though right :) ↳ selinabui @ oscarpiastri idk maybe...?

TWITTER

lina !!! @EB_selina · 1h this is really hindering my enjoyment of 'so american' ↳ Oscar Piastri @ OscarPiastri · 1h I reaaally hate to break it to you but I think you might be the American in this relationship ↳ lina !!! @EB_selina · 53m take that back rn i'm serious ↳ Oscar Piastri @ OscarPiastri · 49m Which one of us has lived in California for half a decade? 🤔

↳ abby <3 @devilvows · 37m can you imagine waking up to that face? oscar piastri, you lucky bitch

↳ lila💚 @kasdanrights · 2h oscar piastri i was not familiar with your game ↳ lila💚 @kasdanrights · 2h selina, i understand you now, i get it now, truly i do, hooooly

oscalina real ?! @ emptyginbottles · 1h i think the entire empty bottles fandom and oscalina shippers trying to cleanse the tl by posting some of the most jaw-clenching, hottest pictures of oscar and lina is so funny ↳ oscalina real ?! @ emptyginbottles · 1h the best part is that it's actually working and also so many more empty bottles fans are realising how unfairly attractive oscar piastri is

INSTAGRAM

selinabui Seoul, South Korea

liked by oscarpiastri and 138,958 others

selinabui heal my s(e)oul tagged: cameliazzz, blublublupi, and lukaszhang

lukaszhang i thought i specifically asked you not to post that ↳ selinabui @lukaszhang i actually wasn't gonna but then you told me not to so obviously i had to

oscarpiastri 🧡 ↳ selinabui @ oscarpiastri any other fucking colour heart i beg ↳ oscarpiastri @ selinabui You know I'm contractually obligated

emptybottlos i'm convinced they agreed to go on tour just to travel, visit friends and eat a bunch of authentic food

ceciliapham someone else is in seoul rn 👀 ↳ marie_h.sb @ceciliapham in what world do you think your gonna see lina and chris yamada in the same room again?

✧･ﾟ: ✧･ﾟ:✧･ﾟ: ✧･ﾟ:✧･ﾟ: ✧･ﾟ:

taglist @ririyulife @ashy-kit @fionaschicken @namgification @cherry-piee

[austinsastrology8991]

Mercury in da HoUSe (s) mercury and why you think your smart - you only think your smart, you don't even know if you are because you can't think any other way. I dont care if people tell you your smart, they don't even know if they are smart because they have the same dilemma as you....... but if you think your dumb your probs right.... okay enough chit chat we gotta do some astrollogy >> Mercury in the first - These guys talk the talk, hella good at talking, talk too much, but at least they know how to talk. but it gives everyone in the rooom a headache. also there voices go a million directions... they like to put on voices. actually i hate your voice. its too earpiercing its like your looking at there voice even if you look away. how are you able to make me look at yo voice, its meant to be auditory but i can fucking see it STFUUUU Mercury in the second - I like money but not as much as this guy. this guy will think of every scam, every business every investment possible just to prove his worth (typically with money) as kids they are hustlers with money, everyone knows they gonna make coin, but typically as they get older, money don't mean shit to them and they start investing into something substantial and if they dont grow outta this mindset, they become shells of themselves like bill gates or the amazon guy. mercury in the third - okay these guys are actually smart, but its almost hard to tell. because there intelljgence isn't attached to anything beside intelligence itself. so its hard to notice, but they are very smart people. quick learners but i notice not quick thinkers, or at least they don't voice it much. which i guess makes them smart because they ploying liek dat mercury in the fourth - subtle intelligence, almost manipulative intelligence, they are the types to make you make a point jsut so they can point out the flaws in your point rather than make a argument themselves.... then make an argument once yours has been smashed to pieces. assholes honestly... but i rate it its just smart tactics but make em talk first and they speechless lmao mercury in the fifth - funny yes your funny, yes i see what you did there, oh yes this next joke is also funny because it ties in with your last joke.. did i mention your funnY? oh im not that funny, well im sorry i can't do it like you becayse yourr liek for real funny. okay can someone else speak now, this guys voice wasn't annoying but now it is. fr comedians but every comedian over do it, and so do they mercury in the sixth - annoying intelligence, always pointing out the flaws in whatever the fuck you just said. like dude im trying my best to think, to then speak it, and to respect you as a person. and your lookjing for flaws, in my speech? oh you can't help it? well i can't help but not wanna talk to you. annoyingly nitpicky with what i say you say she say, why so serious? oh your too smart? thats what every dumbass has ever said to me stfu. mercury in the seventh - always on your back, but can you get off my back, im still working on my argument i dont need you to suck me off about it jeezes. id rather you criticize me honestly. oh now your critical of me. well why can't you just think for yourself. oh you don't know how to. you only don't know how to because you just wanna learn more and more and more and more and more. and now you dont know how to think for yourself. congrats you played yoself mercury in the eighth - so mysterious wow so profound, i never saw it that way. no you just were thinking of something cool to say this whole time and you jsut thought of it. your only quiet so you dont look like a fool. insecure bitch ass. oh but now you just wanna insult me yeah thats because i called you out. honestly these guys are just looking for a deep chat, and its only deep because they were digging for so long.

mercury in the ninth - these guys know way too much bullshit. like they read a lot and just spit random facts and its hard to talk to them without feeling patronized. like yeah we get it, you read a lot. most peole don't because we like to be a human, not live in a book. go outside its nice. oh thats where you get your information > outside, books, the world is your dictionary - god you really are annoying. oh you knew that already. fuck off man.

mercury in the tenth - shrewd; always thinking and saying the best possible thing to say for each scenario, and its typically just sayings they read in hustler books, or what they dad said once. yeah your street smart, but no one else advertises it as much as you, which means you don't understand the streets as well as you think. yep thats right re-strategise; they just wanna own the streets i swear. and no one tries as hard as them. and thats saying something mercury in the eleventh - stop protesting you mong, you really think convincing us the realities of the world, will change the world? oh itll start the butterfly effect, okay true go on, tell us how eating veggies gonna stop the meat industry. oh you were just saying this crap for bants. yep that was annoying. oh now you wanna talk about how attitudes has shaped the world, dude why you always trying to integrate everysingle philsophy of the world into one conversation. you do realise its all bullshit? but everyone likes em because they invite everyone in on the conversation... hey someone gota do it Mercury in the twelfth - these guys are the worst i swear, cant be more manipulative than these lot, they will act innocent, but come at you aggressivly, and itll just confuse ya. youll think they just dumb and naive but they klnow damn well what da hell they doing. play yo game with someone else... oh you don't like to play with them because they fall for your shit, yep so you only like people who set you straight ehhhh you should just come at me straight or ill set you straight. oh you just struggle with convos well it shows.

[slamminslamminmcgill]

hiiii uhhh joel drabble based on my daddy dick appointment yesterday

warning: rimming, intox (poppers and weed), oral, squirting, erectile dysfunction (real old man dick enjoyers know wassup), toys, overstimulation, daddy kink obvs

anatomical terms: cunt/pussy, clit/cock/dick

It’s not that you had daddy issues.

Or that he had a framed picture of him and his daughter on the shelf.

Or a throw pillow with the word DAD sewn onto it, clutched against your chest as he messily ate you out on the leather sectional in his one bedroom apartment.

No, he was just hot. A hot older guy that hit you up on Grindr for the ol' smoke and poke, a quick hit of some blunt and cunt. That’s it. That’s all this was.

He was just a hot older guy, and nothing more.

Not a daddy.

The picture of his daughter was not staring you down while you blew him, much too rigorously for his liking.

“Easy, easy there, easy. Slow down, baby. I don’t wanna cum yet. Just- Just lick my balls for a little bit. Nice and slow, good boy.”

You did as he said, slithering your tongue across and smothering your face in his massive balls, trying and failing to fit even just one in your mouth. You did not want to think about how that girl in the picture frame was once swimming around in them.

And you definitely were not wondering if his daughter’s mother ever ate his ass out like this. With how tense he was, you figured probably not, but he opened up beautifully once you lubed up your fingers. Hell, he even took that buttplug like a champ.

“Oh, Jesus Christ… Ngh…”

“You okay?”

“Yeah, yeah, I’m good… Just gotta… Mmm, just gotta get used to it, sweetness.”

Maybe his ex was kinky. Maybe she’d been the first one to touch his prostate. Or maybe it was his doctor just a couple weeks ago. Maybe it’d been revelation, divine knowledge bestowed to him while bent over on the exam table, and he’d been experimenting ever since, trying to make lightning strike twice.

You were not trying to guess whether he was divorced, a widower, or a cheater. Hopefully not the third, because nothing will kill an orgasm faster than a vengeful spouse and a loaded handgun. But hey, that’s not your problem. Not yet, at least, and hopefully not ever.

Just a hot older guy. Decades of experience, and it showed. He surely knew his way around a pussy, liquid proof dripping from his mustache. He knelt down in front of you once more, hoisted your legs onto his shoulders, and yanked your butt off the edge of the couch.

“Got the poppers, bud? Y’wanna hold ‘em up for me?”

You uncapped and held the small bottle to his nostril and watched him take a five second inhale, then a breath, and another five second inhale.

Fuck, he was hot.

You barely had time to bring the poppers to your own face before his went down. His tongue pressed and flicked, swirled and licked your fattened clit. Two long fingers shoved up your pussy, and one snuck up your ass, all three reaching much deeper than you could do yourself. They pumped in time with his mouth, at first. Steady, deliberate motions intended to open you up for something more. He rose to his feet, bringing your legs up with him, and feverishly pumped his half-hard cock. Brows knit in unwavering focus as he tried to get it all the way up.

“Shit… won’t stay up. Hol’ on. Where’s the damn…?”

He grabbed a rubber ring off the coffee table and slid it onto his cock, tugging his heavy balls through the loop. You watched, entranced, having no frame of reference for what that might feel like. You tried to imagine it on your own cock: a tight pinch, forcing all that blood into it, all that pressure. It sounded heavenly on its own, but to be fair, you had much less dick to fill. The ring seemed to be doing the trick for him, though. He finally got it up, poked it against your cunt, and shoved it in. No time to waste, and no time to adjust before he started coring you out on the couch.

For about three thrusts, and then he fell out.

“Son of a… Fuck it.”

In a fit of sexual frustration, he fell to his knees and plunged his face into your pussy once more. All tact and any shred of restraint he had left was gone. He was an animal, and devoured you as such. He sucked your tiny dick up into his mouth, tugging at it like he was trying to tear it off. The three fingers went back into your holes as if they'd never left, finding your sweet spots in a matter of seconds. He jackhammered them, forcing you to bear a ruthless, brutal onslaught of pleasure. The speed had your entire body shaking, even down to your voice.

"F-F-F-u-u-u-u-u-c-k-k, o-o-h-h-h-h, y-y-y-e-e-e-e-e-s-s-s..."

It sounded like you were moaning into a desk fan, the sobs of ecstasy being intercepted by his hand. His wrist did not falter, not for a moment. Not even when every jab of his fingers got him splashed with cum. Every. Jab. You honestly didn't even know you could physically squirt this much. Hell, you couldn't stop squirting. Not that you'd want to, but still. He just took it on the chin, quite literally, snarling with sadistic satisfaction as he drank it all down. When his thirst was finally quenched, he pulled back, his face glistening with your juices.

"Sorry I couldn't get hard, darlin'. I dunno if it was the poppers or the pot or what... Usually doesn't happen to me."

The fuck? The man sucks your soul out of your body, gives you an industrial-strength orgasm, and the first word out of his mouth is sorry? Your cunt was still buzzing a good 30 seconds after he stopped and he thinks to apologize? Is this guy for real? You shut that shit down right away.

"No, no, no, oh my god, you're... you're fine, don't worry... Shit... That was... You're fucking amazing... Thank you..."

"Aw, pleasure's all mine, sugarplum. You taste fuckin' incredible, y'know. I could-"

*RING*

"Shit, it's my daughter. I gotta take this."

Saying the quiet part out loud, it seems.

[josibunn]

kappa who just treats reader like theyre so fuckin dumb BRAINROTTTTT like hes just gotta do everythin for you, how could somethin so sweet and precious do anything on their own? (bonus for when reader gets accustomed to bein babied all the time and gets a little attitude from time to time kapa is always ready to put them back in their place 🙈)

oooh I love this!! I have a wip fic of kap and he’s so daddy in it..taking care of reader real good and never letting her do anything herself..just how I like em!!

˗ˏˋ ★ ˎˊ˗

you’re his his baby,,he lets u sleep in all day while he’s out n about n by the time u wake up (2 pm) he’s already done everything he needs to do for the day. you wake up as soon as he gets home all sleepy and tip toey, rubbing your eyes. “hi princess…just get up?” he closes the door and embraces you into his side and you nod. “where’d you go..? smell like..metal.” you say, and he now knows he didn’t scrub the blood off better.

“had to handle some business, want something to eat? got you food n ice cream,” and you’re already forgetting about the smell as he carries u to the couch.

with kapdaddy u never have to think around him like..brain is always off :3 he knows you like the back of his hand, before you’re even asking he’s all “let’s get something to eat, yeah?” “think youre gonna wear this dress today.” “wanna take a bath together?” “what’s with that face, huh? need me to take care of u?” hes such a man I love himmm

I feel like with kap you wouldn’t wanna piss him off bc he’s just so sweet and loving and dicks you down so good!! but on the off chance you’re feeling neglected one day you just had to get on his nerves and even then he’d have so much patience with you, until he didn’t. he’s been busy all day, you haven’t seen him since he woke you up, and even after a nap he’s been all gone and busy >:(. hasn’t even checked in on you and when he comes home in a rush you’re not havin it, but he isn’t either.

you’re at the counter, an angry pout on your face when you hear his car pull in. he comes in, kissing your cheek and squeezing your hip as he gets past you, “hi mamabear,” he coos, and although you feel butterflies you give him your silent treatment. “you ate today? bet you haven’t, hey listen I need your help with somethin ok? so get dressed, and i’ll take you out n get you somethin on the way.” he almost walks out the kitchen but pauses when you A. don’t say anything, and B. don’t move, still eating at your tiny snack.

he crosses his arms, watching you move like he’s not there. “okay?” he repeats, still getting the cold shoulder from you. he pokes the inside of his cheek with his tongue before snatching you up, grabbing the back of your neck and forcing your eyes on his. “you speak when fucking spoken to, got it?” he eyes you hard, but you just send back the same pout and glare.

“what’s the matter with you, hm? do I gotta take care of you?” he threatens, but when you take a little too long to answer he squeezes your neck, making you squeak. “i’m not the one today, you either tell me what’s wrong or i’m gonna get it outta you the hard way, which one is it.”

and you shy away from his hard eyes, poking out your lip. “haven’t seen you all day.” you say, and he runs a hand over his face. “been workin sugar, you know that. been out and about all day, you think I been ignorin you or somethin?” he moved his hand off your neck and cups your hips, pulling your front again his, and you heat up feeling his bulge against you, going puppy eyed.

“cmon baby you know I don’t mean to, just doin a lot. if you miss me jus text me, yknow? i’ll be over in a heartbeat, just don’t give me that shit again, kay? don’t make me have to break you.” he says, and you nod dumbly bc he gives you a little kiss and sends you off to get dressed.

˗ˏˋ ★ ˎˊ˗

join my taglist! @angelsanarchy @sugarinte @monkeyfart @444rockstargf @bambi-horror @auggiethecreator @wonkinoo @brithedemonspawn @yungbloodsuxca @weezinrnween @bluerthanvelvet444 @nom-nommmm1 @xelam444 @iiheartsai

[curvykittyyssmutfics]

Dad's Best Friend ft. Kishibe

dbf!Kishibe who's been your father's bff for over 25 years and loves you more than anything in the world: Coddles and shows you a gross amount of affection, like you're not a whole grown ass woman. Let's you plop in his lap evertime he comes over for a drink, ignoring your father's taunts bout your neediness. Dark eyes glued the tv, absentmindely rubbing circles on your back as you nuzzle into his neck. Ignorant to the sheer will it takes you not grind onto his soft cock. "Okay there, sweets? You keep squirming.. Won me ta hold you closer?" You nod, warmth spreading through your body when Kishibe tightens his embrace.

dbf!Kishibe isn't big on conversation but thinks it's adorable how you ramble on about any and everything to him: Just random shit. From your favorite celeb gossip to simple girl talk, you keep his attention for hours. Only his girl can get him caught up on the most recent trash reality tv shows that he never intends to watch. Unless you ask him to of course. Kishibe lends a honest ear, asks questions, and provides commentary when needed. "Baby, I can't be the only person you got to talk to right now. Its 2am. Know I have work early in the mornin." He groans from his end of the phone. "Yeah, but I haven't seen you inna few days. I miss youuu. Wanna hear your voice." Kishibe sighs. He knows that's only a half truth. Also knows he won't be gettin off the phone anytime soon. "That right? Think you just wanna tell me what happened on the next episode of.. What was it?" He teases. "It's called Baddies! See? You never listen!" Kishibe rolls his eyes. "Uh huh. That must be why you on my line right now. tsk. Go on and tell me what happened on ya lil show before I go to sleep on yo ass." "Okay, okay! Geez.."

dbf!Kishibe has always treated you like his princess, but you're older now, and very aware of his Queen treatment: All begins when he notices you real down for a few days. Doesnt wanna pry so he starts wakin you up to compliments and affirmations through text. Even as a man of few words, he thinks it's important you know how smart, kind and pretty you are. You're worth simply can't be measured to Kishibe, and he needs you to understand that. Doesn't care if your dad's around or who hears how special he thinks you are. "Fuckin aced my exam!" You exclaim one late afternoon, slidin through the kitchen after gettin back from uni. Kishibe and your father wait for you, posted at the breakfast bar. Kishibe arms squeeze tight inna hug while your dad opts for high five and small tickle to your side. "So fantastic, sweetheart! Knew you could do it. Always been too smart for your own good." Kishibe chuckles at your pout. "Know what? Let's go out. We gotta celebrate our girls milestone." But your dad scoffs. "Milestone? It's just a test, Kish. She takes em all time." "Dad, it's not just a test. I studied hard as hell for this one. It's a large chunk of my grade." Kishibe slings an arm round your shoulders, holdin up your exam papers before chiming in again. "Come on, old man. She passed with flying colors. Our girl could be a doctor or some shit. Never know. I say she deserves some special treatment." "Then you take her. Work drained all this old man's energy. I'm goin to sleep. Great job again, y/n. Proud of you." With a kiss to your forehead, he's off to bed. Kishibe doesn't let you wallow though. Pulls you in close to whisper in your ear. "Three's a crowd anyway, sweet thing. Go put on somethin black and tiny. Let's go do somethin fun tonight."

dbf!Kishibe only pretends to be oblivious to your little crush on him: He doesn't mind his gorgeous girl's longing stares or subtle flirting. Teases the fuck out you by purposefully acting clueless. Wants to see how far you'll go with your little infatuation. And it's a full time job. So Kishibe finds any reason to sleep over whenever he can. "Babygirl?" He calls for you naked and wet through the cracked bathroom door. "Bring me my towel, please. Left it on the bed." You comply, not realizing the treat you're in store for. Jaw dropping seeing his pretty dick for the first time. It's not hard but it's still so thick. A nice medium toned flesh colored shaft, mushroom tip dark pink and flaring wide. Its fuckin perfect. "H-here.. Here you go." "Thanks." Kishibe takes the towel, sexy grin appearin how your gaze never wavers from his cock. He's startin to stiffen- and drip more than water from your lusty stare . "Careful, honey. You're wakin the beast. Can't do that when your dad's around."

dbf!Kishibe loves to spoil you rotten: Takes you shoppin, gets your nails and hair done, puts gas in you car. Whatever you desire is at your finger tips. All you gotta do is flutter your lashes and pout your full lips and Kishibe is bending to your every will: "The fuck you need this for?" His words a nasty growl when you interrupt him workin on your dad's car to shove your phone into his face and show him a skimpy lavender lingerie set. "Thought you said pretty girls deserve pretty things." You whine, stomping your foot when Kishibe scoffs and bends under the hood to resume his task. "I'm not buyin that shit for you to show some lil fuck boy in your class, y/n." How dare he! You were absolutely repulsed by your first taste of fuck boy and only have eyes for him. "Not for anyone, Kishi. Just thought it would look good on me. Don't you?" He glances up, eyes raking over every inch of you. Fuck yeah, he does. Plus, Kishibe just can't take the soft vulnerable face you put on once he meets your gaze. Or the thought of that flimsy scrap of lace wrapped round your frame. "Fine, y/n." He takes his wallet out and tosses it to you. "You better get one in my favorite color- nah. Scratch that. Get one of each. And do same day shipping. I want a picture of it on you by tonight."

dbf!Kishibe does random pop ups when your left home alone for extended amounts of time: Knows your father works hard and promises to take good care of their little girl when he's away. Though this time, you don't expect him anytime soon since Kishibe texts he'll be comin by late tonight. When he finally does arrive, his idea of surprising you with your favorite dish doesn't quite go as planned. He let's himself in with the spare key and tip toes to your room but your not there. After a quick search, he finds you in the guest room and is stunned into silence. You're tangled in the sheets on your hands and knees, hardly covered in that damn pastel purple scrap of lace, slowly fuckin your puffy chocolate puss with a pink dildo. Clearly you hadn't washed the covers from Kishibe's overnight stay the way you inhale them, arch deepening and puttin your most delicate areas on display to his greedy gaze. The little show you put on has his girth raging stiff for you in record time. "Uhn! Oh, Kishibeee! Uhh, uhh, uhh! Stuff me till I can't take it. Need your fat cock to ruin me, Kishi!" His ears burn hot listening to you as he stares intently between your beautiful brown thighs, mouth watering for a taste. Swollen cock won't stop twitchin, precum already drippin in anticipation. "Yeees! Feed this pussy that dick, give it to me! So fuckin wet for you, know it'll slide right in." Your brows pinch, nose scrunching as you fuck yourself a bit quicker. Little puss drooling from the stretch, squelching loud from the swift pumps. "Wish you were here.. Ahh! Don't wanna -mmm- wait anymore. Want you to h-hold me down.. Fuck me like onahole, Daddy!" The fuck?! Kishibe groans quietly at your slutty pleas. Fuck, you're askin for it. His dick throbs widly from how feral you're behaving, even though the dildo's barely half way in. "Ohfuh- Kishibe!Fuckfuckfuck! 'S so big, splitting me in half! Fill me up just like that.. Haah, so close! Gonna cum so much, Kishi!" Kishibe's mouth drops open, grip on your dinner involuntarily loosening a bit as his groin pulses intensely. He's stuck frozen in place, totally entranced, ready to burst at the seams from the erotic visual. "Yeees.. Oh God, gonna wet up that big dick.. F-fuck me, Kishi! Fuck this pussy till I cum, make it yours Daddy! Ohmy- cummiiing! So good! Haahshit! Feels so fuckin goood!" Witnessing you gush all over your toy and sheets is his demise. Kishibe's gotta bite his bottom lip to muffle his grunts as he nuts. Pent up cock spurting cum like a fire hose as he watches you shiver, swearin and callin out to him while you fuck yourself into overstimulation.

dbf!Kishibe can't stop his dick from chubbin when your in his presence anymore, so he spends less time with you: It's always been a challenge to look and not touch but how can he do that when he hears your beautiful filthy fuckin sobs of his name ringin in his ears 24/7? The image of you cummin ingrained in his mind so fiercely, he's officially rubbed his dick raw. Thinks his hiatus will save you before he does somethin he can't take back. But then you show up on Kishibe's doorstep, hair inna messy bun, dressed in one of his old hoodies and the tiniest pair of jean shorts he's ever seen. Pretty y/e/c eyes rimmed red and teary as you yell at him for ghosting you. "..so what, replace me that fast? Can't answer my calls or texts? At least coulda responded to my fuckin email- I begged you to tell me what I did wrong! You're a fuckin piece of shit, Kishibe!" You tire yourself shoutin and bangin on his chiseled chest. End up right back in his lap, on his couch this time as he tries to console you. "I know sweetheart, I'ma fuckin jerk. Asshole like me don't deserve a perfect girl like you. Didn't do anything to me. How could you? Ain't nothin a sweet thing like you could do to push me away, you know that. Its.. It's all my fault." "Then why, Kish? Why'd you leave me? Told me.. Told me I'm you're favorite girl, that you'd always be here for me. So why can't you just tell me what's goin on? I don't get it.. Or at least my dad. He's your best friend." Kishibe sighs, shakin his head. "Yeah, I know that. But how in the hell do I tell my best bud that I watched our girl fuck her own brains out while screamin for me to use her like a onahole? Hmm? And that I actually almost did. Was two seconds from pushin your head into the sheets so I could breed that inexperienced lil pussy all night long." You tense on his muscled thigh for the briefest of moments. "Had to stay away, y/n. I went too far.." The fuck he did. Didn't go far enough. And how could you not realize he saw the lewd display? Even with pretendin to arrive a good while after, he couldn't take his gaze from you the entire evening. Finally.. At last it feels like your advances are gettin you somewhere. "And?" You stand up, lookin down on his fine ass. "And? Wha- ... Fuck you mean and?" Kishibe stares up at you incredulously, tongue swipin over his bottom lip when his eyes do a swift dart to your smooth mocha thighs.

"Did you really think we'd just endlessly flirt forever? Geez Kishi.. Don't make me have to spell it out for you. Supposed to be this big strong devil hunter." You pull off your hoodie, revealing your bare chest. Undoin your bun, messy 30 inch waves tumble down your shoulders and back. "Y/n, baby, wait. Let's talk bout this." "Looks like you wanna do more than talk, Kish." Fuck, your right. Kishibe's so fuckin hard. Even though that should be impossible after how much he's nutted to you these past 2 weeks. But your tits are so damn pretty and he really wants to play with the cute cherry piercings dangling from your stiff dark peaks. Still, Kishibe attempts one last play at 'the good guy' when you go to push down your shorts. "Don't." It's a weak protest. "Please, babygirl. Don't do this.. I'm only a man." Your bottoms hit the floor as you giggle, pussy clenchin at his dick visibly beatin against his slacks. "And I'm a woman, Kishibe. Your woman." He groans a low "Fuck yes." fists balling when you crowd him, settin your painted toes on the edge of the couch; the angle spreadin your glistening cocoa cunt for him. "You know.. Lately, you don't listen to me very well, Kishi. And we've both know I've always been very concise about my wants and needs." Two fingers creep to move in and out of your hot lil snatch, free hand fisting at his short blonde tips as you effortlessly fall into a slow deep rythym. "So I need- mmm.. Need you to listen like you used to.. You can do that for me, yeah?" Kishibe's dying to replace his digits with yours. Swallows hard watchin you scissor your fingers before strokin your coochie a bit quicker. The generous amount of slick provides a nice wet plap plap to fill the air. "But you hear me now, right Daddy?" Fuck it! He can't fight against it anymore. Lips dam near teleportin round your poundin clit, eyes closing in bliss as he nods and nurses your sensitive nub. "Kishibe!" His big hands grab your ass and hold you against his incessant mouth, dick ready to buss from your shrieks and the taste of your creamy cookie. Yeah, Kishibe hears you all alright.

[bluecollarmcandtf]

Hypno Handyman Inc.

So I got this idea about a week ago: what if I used some hypnosis to help my failing repair business. See, all of today's young men are afraid of getting their hands dirty, and it's been impossible to hire any of those pansies. So I thought, 'Why not hypnotize them instead?'

This is Tim and Jim. They're identical twins, but I made Jim shave his head so I could tell them apart. Wait, maybe that was Tim. I don't remember, but it doesn't matter anymore! What's important is that they've been thoroughly hypnotized. Just look at the dopey grins they always have on!

These brothers were once my neighbors, back when they were influencers or something. I'm not really sure what they did for work, but now they are actually contributing members of society. I did them some good, bringing them under my control. Now they actually enjoy all the long hours and hard menial labor.

"Go ahead and tell 'em what your doing, boys!"

"Sure, boss," Tim answers brightly, "Jim and I are just grabbing some tools for a job. Mrs. Jones has a leaky pipe again."

"This is the third time this month." Jim explains with a blank smile.

I chuckle and shake my head. Mrs. Jones, the retired widow, was almost definitely just calling so she could oggle these young men as they tinker with a problem she made up. She's definitely wasting my employees' time, but I don't mind as long as she keeps paying.

"Just remember your new mantra, boys," I check.

Their bodies stiffen as they robotically relay what I taught them, "We work for you. We are your handymen. We work hard, stay humble, and always respect our client and our boss."

"That's right," I beam with pride, "Go ahead and unbutton your uniforms, boys. If Mrs. Jones wants a show, you're gonna give her one."

"Yes, boss!" they declare, smiling as they loosen their shirts before packing their tools in the truck.

They used to have a real attitude problem: thought awfully highly of themselves since they were 'TickTock famous' or whatever. Obviously, that was the first thing I corrected in their personalities. Tim and Jim are now just the perfect humble and eager-to-please workers they should be. I don't think I've seen them drop those stupid smiles in weeks!

This here is Rodrigo. He used to be a model or something, which meant he had practically no skills or common sense to begin with. At least his simple mind was super easy to hypnotize. I tried programming a bunch of common knowledge about plumbing or mechanics in that head of his, but it never stuck. That's why I always have him doing the simple heavy lifting.

"What's up, Rigo! Working hard?"

"Yes, boss," he reports with a heavy breath, "I'm just hauling the fresh supplies into the garage."

"Glad, I can count on you, boy," I clap him on his shoulder, pleased to find his hard work soaking into his uniform, "It's hard work, but someone's gotta do it!"

"Yes, boss," he agrees, and turns his head to the floor as he gets back to it.

I doubt that boy ever had a hard day of work before he met me. He didn't have a shred of real muscle on him when I found him. The only thing his pretty arms could carry were a bunch of shopping bags from the mall.

He threw all that fancy attire away after I had him under trance. I think those clothes on his back are the only thing he owns now. It's not like any of my guys need something nice to wear. They're just my handymen, after all, and I intend to milk their hard-working asses for all their worth.

This last guy is my newest recruit. He came crawling to me when he got fired at his last job. His name is Cameron, and he's been quite a handful. Out of all the idiots I've hypnotized so far, he's been able to resist the most.

He's still thoroughly under my control, but I can't seem to control his thoughts like I can with the other guys. That's why I have him doing all the nastiest jobs. Hopefully it'll break that strong will of his!

"Hey, Cammy," I call.

"Don't call me that!" he snaps, "I'm not your damn puppet like those other freaks!"

His words have venom in them, but his body doesn't seem to agree. His head stays bowed in a mock of submission as he diligently searches the supply closet.

"What you lookin' for, Cammy?" I ask.

"The fucking plunger! You've got me on clogged toilet duty, remember?" he growled in frustration, "How long are you going to keep me doing this?"

"There's a lot of people who aren't willing to clean their shitters," I explain, "And you'll keep doing it as long as people will pay!"

I let out a sigh as Cameron continues to get more and more frustrated. Despite his radical glare, his body can't stop searching for that plunger.

"It's in the bathroom," I finally admit, "Go ahead and kiss each of our shitters while your in their."

Cameron's face twists in disgust as his body obediently marches past me, carrying him to our company restroom. He's clearly angry beyond words for being made to degrade himself once again. One day I'll get him to see me as a respectable employer just like the rest of the guys do. It's only a matter of time.

"Hey Cammy!" I call before he leaves, "Don't forget about tonight. You remember what we discussed yesterday, right?"

Despite all his internalized rage, his eyes glaze over as my hypnotic instructions kick in, "I'm on house duty. I will cook, serve, and clean up dinner for you and the rest of the men. I will be ready to give massages and showers to you and the rest of the men. I will not let myself relax until you and the rest of the men have no need of me. I will be on house duty every night forever, until you say otherwise."

"That's right," I smile in amusement, "Carry on!"

His vacant stare melts away, and he quickly adopts his trademark glare. His hands ball into fists like he's about to fight back, but he just turns and walks down the hallway. I chuckle at the idea of him in that empty bathroom, angrily kissing each of our toilet seats.

I put aside Cameron's defiance and relish just how far my repair business has gone. Not only am I making a ton more money than when it was just me, but I also have a whole flock of guys to keep me company. Even though they are all products of a weaker generation, I am well on my way towards turning each of them into real men like myself.

Already, I have Tim, Jim, and Rodrigo sipping beers and watching football with me after work everyday. I'll tell you that none of those boys enjoyed either of those things before they met me. Eventually, I'll have them genuinely laughing at all my jokes too!

Whether or not Malcolm comes around, is honestly unimportant. As long as he keeps up the disrespect, I'll keep him in the worst jobs and the longest hours.

I'm telling you, hypnotizing your employees is the way to go! So, let me know if you need any help getting your workers under your control. Or just let me know if you need a good old-fashioned handyman to fix something for you!

My boys will do anything as long as you fork over some cash...

[zero-ek]

As soon as Yuu was released the first thing i did was to listen to her voice lines, not only because of who is voicing her (the Sailor Moon!!) but because i was very curious as to what sort of dimension her voice would add to her character.

And it's particularly interesting the way that her voice sells how... empty she is, like not only in that losing her memories destroyed her sense of self and her morality (like i had initially expected), but in that she doesn't seem to have a firm grasp of anything beyond the ideas of "Yuu", Shii, the list, Magical Girls and Witches. Like, it's like she doesn't even know what being a human even is.

That much is obvious just in the way she speaks, like she keeps switching back and forth between multiple voices and running over her own words, like she speaks out of muscle memory and can't control the sounds that her mouth makes. But also, some of the stuff she says is... concerning, here's a few lines:

(I got these from her F*ndom quotes page i didn't know where else to find them)

"We're together today too... is that the same as yesterday? Does that mean tomorrow's gonna be the same!? And two days ago too? I guess after tomorrow too... wait so even today too!?"

From her first login, notice how by the end of the sentence she forgot about whay she said at the start completely. Also it's hard to convey through written text but, not only her sense of object and spacial permanence is nonexistent, she seems to genuinely have a hard time undertanding the concept of time:

"Did you just say good morning? Oh that must mean it's morning nowiseewaitdid i... did i sleep? I'm bummed... no i'm not, aha! Morning!"

Her morning login.

"Did you just tell me good night...? 'Good night' is what you say when you're done for the day!? So if we keep repeating 'good night' forever, can we stop tomorrow from coming...?"

Her night login

A couple of her lines showing her extremely short memory, and how it affects her fundamental understanding of things:

"Man, i'm so hungry... WAIT! I think i was just full...! Which was it! Doesn't it really suck how you can never tell what's inside of your tummy?"

Noon login.

"Sorry! I...! What was i thinking about? Do you know? Can you tell me? What a bummer, what a bummer... Wait, what was i bummed about?"

Her standard login (honestly same).

"I gotta get goinghmm...? Where was i going again?"

Story end 3

"If your arms or your legs get really old, then why not just rip 'em off? It's gonna grow new ones so it's okay, here, lemme help you!"

Tap 4.

"Nagisa-chan loves cheese, meanwhile i have 'someone'... 'someone' is me! So don't forget about cheese and 'someone' even when tomorrow comes, alright?"

Magical release 1

"Y'see, ghosts only come from the past, they don't be coming from the future! So why... can i only go to tomorrow?"

Magical release 2

Also this one is just, man...

"No matter how many times time turns back, i'll keep doing the same thing! 'Cause i don't wanna pretend that all the times i messed up and all the times i was sad weren't real!"

Tap 8

It's also extremely unnerving how genuinely childlike and innocent her "main", higher pitched voice is, like i can't explain why but it really sells that she does what she does all because she genuinely doesn't know any other way to live, not least because it seems she wholeheartedly doesn't seem to be able to think beyond the current moment, like she just goes with the flow of time without having anything to ground herself on.

I think that, while having a fully fledged design added to her "inhuman" factor in a creepy manner, like, compounding to the idea of this beastly Magical Girl that rips people's organs off, her voice made her "inhuman" in a much crueler and sad way, in that it served to illustrate that she is the way she is because it's quite literally the only way of living that she knows.

[jayfortheday]

Hiii. Can you do a oneshot for Vance where he’s been crushing on the reader (from a distance) for a WHILE, and every time he tries to talk to them, they just avoid him and he finds out it’s because they’re scared of him cause of his violent reputation, so he ends trying to be extra nice/goofy to them but it just comes of as awkward and out of nowhere. Just thought it would be kinda funny<3

Scared Of Me (Vance Hopper)

Pairing: Vance Hopper x GN!Reader (romantic)

Word count: 995

Description: After Vance find out his crush, Y/N, thinks he's scary, he starts trying to become more approachable

Tags: Cute, Vance doesn't like reading, mention of dates

~~~~~~~~~~~

Vance watched as you crossed the yard, a small smile on your face as you looked at the grass. His face blushed as he imagined approaching you, which he was about to do. He took a deep breath before standing up and walking over. As you heard the crunching of the grass, you look up and your eyes widened as you saw Vance Hopper approaching you. You sped up your pace, hoping your paths wouldn’t intersect. You could hear Vance speeding up to before he called out your name. You slowed and stopped, mentally cursing, before you turned to face him. 

“Hey, Y/N. How’s it going?” Vance asked, hoping it would be a good conversation starter. 

“Oh, um, hey, it’s fine, I just, uh, really gotta get home, my mom’s waiting for me,” you stumbled, backing up a bit as you talked. 

“Oh. Ok,” Vance said, his voice sounding a little defeated. With that, you turned around and hurried in the other direction, eager to get away from the situation while you could. Vance looked at you, disappointed, as you walked away. 

“Tough shit,” one of Vance’s friends said as he approached him. “It’s not like you had much of a shot anyways.” Vance whipped his head to his friend.

“What’s that supposed to mean,” Vance grumbled, an aggressive tone in his voice.

“That is exactly what I mean,” the other boy said, crossing his arms over his chest. “Just look at ‘em, they’re fuckin’ scared of you, man.” The boy laughed a bit as he watched you finally round a corner. When he thought about it, that notion fit with the way you had just acted, a nervous tone and an eagerness to leave him. Vance furrowed his brows as he thought.

“Unless you do like a complete 180, which I highly doubt you will, you should just let ‘em go, you got, like, no chance,” the other boy said as he began to walk away. Vance huffed, even though his friend was being a dick about it, he was right. If he wanted a chance with you, he had to change your impression of him. The real question was how. This reputation was still one he wanted to maintain with the general public, it was only your mind he wanted to change. 

- - -

The next day at school, Vance was extra mindful of his actions, he was trying to execute two plans that highly contradicted each other. While it was hard, it wasn’t impossible. He knew his best bet would be talking to you when you were alone, where his changed behavior wouldn’t be observed by anyone else. A good time would probably be lunch. Vance had noticed you often sat by yourself, it usually looked like you were reading while you ate. 

That day at lunch, Vance forewent his usual spot to instead sit at your table. When Vance sat down, you looked up from your book and went rigid when you saw who it was. 

“Whatcha reading?” Vance asked, leaning back on the table. “I really like books, maybe I’ve read it.” This was a lie, reading was definitely not an activity Vance would do in his off time, he was more a fan of video games or just doing random shit at the Grab N Go. You closed the book, marking your page with your thumb, and showed him the cover. Falconer by John Cheever, Vance had never heard of that book. 

“Oh, yeah, I’ve read that one loads of times, one of my favorites. I loved the, uh, falcon. That was great,” Vance said, tripping over his words, trying to maintain his lie. You chuckled a bit.

“Falconer isn’t about falcons, it’s about a man serving time in Falconer State Prison,” you clarified, a little caught off gaurd by Vance’s sudden odd behavior. Vance’s face flushed a bit as he realized he had been caught. He laughed awkwardly.

“Haha, must be a different book I’m thinkin’ of,” his voice now embarrassed. 

“Here,” you said, dog earring your page and handing the book to Vance. “Read the synopsis, it’s pretty interesting.” Vance turned over the book and his eyes scanned back and forth as he read the text. “It was a best seller last year, so I thought I’d give it a shot.”

Vance hummed as he read it. 

“I guess I'm really not the best person to say if this looks good or not,” he chuckled, at this point admitting to his lack of literary interest. He handed the book back and you set it in front of you, your curious eyes still looking at Vance. 

“You’re not what I thought you’d be like,” you remarked, thinking of what Vance’s reputation had made him out to be. 

“What were you expecting?” Vance asked, absentmindedly playing with a piece of his hair.

“I don’t know, I guess, probably mean. I do see you in a lot of fights,” you said, shrugging your shoulders. 

“Yeah, I guess,” Vance said, a bit of a grumbly voice. “But that’s not what I’m like all the time.” He corrected his tone to come off as more friendly rather than aggressive. You perceived the transition as awkward, making you laugh a little. “Um, you play pinball?” You shook your head as you propped your elbow up on the table, supporting your head on your fist. “Maybe I’ll show you sometime,” Vance said, his voice nervous. Your eyes widened, but then your expression softened. “I guess,” you responded, still a little apprehensive of Vance. 

“No pressure, though. It was just a thought,” Vance followed up, sensing your apprehension. 

“Maybe we can decide later, like during lunch tomorrow,” you said, extending an invitation to Vance. 

“You want me to eat lunch with you?” Vance asked quietly, his face turning a light pink. 

“Sure, why not,” you smiled, opening your book again. Vance smiled as he whispered to himself too quiet for you to hear, “it’s a date.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A/N: Hope you enjoyed! This turned out so cute, I love this prompt. I'm glad y'all are loving Vance as much as I am

[unicyclehippo]

release (cr3) for the one word prompt

‘okay. alright,’ imogen says when nana morri gestures for them to go, that all is prepared. no one has stepped into the muck yet. ‘this might be a dumbass idea—‘

‘say it,’ chet encourages, immediately. ‘that’s pretty much the main thing we’ve learned today, right? no bad ideas when they’re just ideas.’

imogen nods, once and then more quickly. ‘right. okay. well, okay. okay. y’all might’ve noticed i took off the circlet—‘ orym nods. so does laudna. the others glance up to where it’s been sitting, which makes sense, being too occupied with their own things to see the tiny change. ‘so. i can look into your minds and then we’ll know who is the doppelgänger.’

silence.

then,

‘it sort of defeats the purpose of the challenge, doesn’t it?’ laudna inquires. ‘you know you’re welcome in my mind any time you wish, darling, but…this is supposed to be about trust, is it not?’

‘i dunno. i’m with mogen. trust is fine when you’re with your pals but if there’s two fuckos in the mix?’ chetney narrows his eyes. ‘bet i could sniff ‘em out. wonder how that works, changing into us. reckon they smell like us? walk like us?’

‘doppelgängers are fucking excellent at what they do. real hard to find.’ ashton scowls at the sidelong looks that earns them. ‘what? i fought one before.’

‘what do they look like cracked open?’ chetney cups a hand around his ear when ashton mumbles something. ‘what was that?’

‘i didn’t get it, okay?’ ashton snaps. ‘it got away. it can look like anyone, of course it fucking got away.’

‘hm. excellent at what they do. got away from you and your hammer… maybe. or maybe you are a doppel and you’re big talking your friends!’ chetney accuses, whipping out a chisel.

‘whoa!’ orym stepped between them, hands outstretched. ‘hold on.’

‘oh, so accusations are a good move but readin’ minds isn’t. got it.’

‘not helping, imogen.’

she lifts her hands in surrender. turns a worried look toward the muck and the altars. they’re wasting time with this. it’d be so easy—read for unfamiliar fey minds, kick out the doubles, grab the sticks.

‘it’s about trust,’ laudna whispers in her ear. she touches a finger to imogen’s wrist as if she doesn’t know - isn’t sure if it’s okay - and some of that is ambient thoughts, imogen thinks, which means it’s gotta be laudna. right? how far did the doubles magic extend? had laudna been thinking about that through both their tests, if it would be wrong to touch her? she grabs laudna’s hand tight. laudna sighs, relieved. ‘it’s about trust,’ she says again. orym nods. ‘what if… we must trust ourselves. our judgement, our instincts. do you remember what it was like to be a group at the start? we didn’t know one another but we had a mutual goal. we trusted one another just enough.’

‘enough to think you guys wouldn’t fuck us over,’ ashton muttered.

‘or you us,’ orym pointed out.

‘point.’

‘so…’ imogen picks up where laudna had left off, giving her hand a squeeze. laudna wraps her other hand tight around her wrist and leans in close, close enough for the floral-rot of her smell to overtake imogen’s senses, lighting her world up pink and bright. ‘uh. we - we can pretend we’re brand new. we need these branches.’

‘i think we can all agree imogen’s herself,’ FCG begins.

‘what! i mean, i am, but -‘

chetney hoots a laugh. ‘you’re blushing over laudna like you’ve never kissed a girl. you have kissed her, right?’

‘yes!’

‘multiple times!’ laudna insists.

‘ooh, multiple,’ chetney teases. ‘sounds sexy.’

sounds like it’s none of your business, imogen says harshly direct into chetney’s mind.

he winces, hand going to his temple. ‘yeah, that’s our imogen. damn! can you chill out? you gotta scream it?’

she narrows her eyes. he flinches, exaggerated, but there’s a smug grin curling his lips up on one side. it feels good to tease and be teased like this. imogen releases a breath she’s been holding onto way too long. rubs her temple.

‘so i’m normal. chet’s normal.’

‘fearne’s been quiet,’ laudna husks in her ear.

fearne’s ears prick up. ‘whoa! ‘scuse you!’

‘well it’s true!’ laudna hunches into herself, uses her grip on imogen’s hand as an anchor, ‘Its true, it is, its true, and none of us would suspect you, she’s your nana, it could be you—’

‘laud.’

‘it could be true,’ laudna says, lip jutting forward.

imogen kisses her. ‘it could be,’ she agrees, voice gentle. ‘but you’re the one who just told us we need to trust.’ she watches laudna blink, then blink again.

‘i did. i- i’m sorry, fearne.’

the faun feigns insult for a moment before she smiles cheekily. ‘that’s alright. i wasn’t listening anyway. i was thinking about trust.’ she eyes each of them, then her nana, and with a very casual sigh and a shrug, steps into the muck.

‘fearne!’

‘we’re not getting anything done hanging out there. orym? wanna get on my back? the mud looks pretty deep.’

orym scrambles up to her shoulders, leaning over her head to peer across the muck. ‘i think i see a path to the first altar. see?’ he points.

fearne hums. ‘i could drown you in the mud pretty easy.’

orym blooms a flower in his hand, tucks it into her hair. ‘please don’t.’

she laughs and walks deeper into the mud, into the test. the mud parts behind her, vague currents pulling through the sludge. it makes sense. there’s such a gravity to fearne. such a pull. did it feel any different? was this still fearne?

trust.

chetney uses ashton’s arm to climb him, keep him lifted out of the mud. he perches on the shoulder of the new arm. laudna eyes the mud warily. it sucks around imogen’s ankles and she knows immediately that FCG and laudna are going to have trouble.

‘ash, wait.’ he flinches when they talk to him now. his mind—she’s not looking but she can’t help but hear—his mind flinches too, scatters like the thunder wasps. flighty, storm front. then reordering to attack. was he afraid her next words would be, stay here? we can’t trust you? kill yourself? ‘can you carry FCG?’

ashton limps to FCG. ‘okay?’

‘sure!’

‘i’ll put you down when you want. you just gotta say.’

‘i know,’ FCG says. ‘i trust you!’

ashton ducks their head. they lift up FCG with a grunt and march into the mud behind fearne, wordlessly following where she leads.

imogen turns. ‘i can make us fly. keep your pretty new dress outta the mud.’ laudna flushes a mottled sort of pink-purple. she nods. her thoughts are syrup sticky-sweet as she meets Imogen’s eyes. ‘i love you.’

laudna smiles. ‘but do you trust me?’ when imogen hesitates, laudna brushes a crooked finger over imogen’s cheek. ‘i don’t think you have since i broke your rock.’

‘i forgave you for that months ago, laud,’

‘yes i know. i know. but there’s a part of you that knows i’m—i’m not me. i’m her.’

‘no—‘

‘yes. and you don’t trust her. you hate her. she disgusts you.’

‘laudna.’

‘it’s fine,’ laudna tells her, so quietly, so sweetly, so sadly. ‘i know. i understand. i feel it myself. but for right now, my love, do you trust that i am myself?’

imogen nods. how can she not? it’s laudna, standing right in front of her. she lets her magic fill her, rise into her skin and out, crackling into her air surrounding her, surrounding them. hooking an arm around laudna’s waist, she lifts them both into the air.

the first and second branches are easy. they’re guarded by traps and quick, muddy creatures they repel and run from, not wanting to harm anything in nana’s realm that can’t be healed.

they’re approaching the third branch when fearne says,

‘i don’t think any of us are doubles.’

ashton pauses. ‘wait. what?’

‘i don’t think any of us—‘

‘we heard you, fearnie,’ imogen says through gritted teeth. she’s trying to run the maths. two doubles. laudna and chet are definitely who they say they are, so is she. so it’s orym and fearne, most likely. right? ‘why do you think that?’

‘it doesn’t make sense! this is supposed to be trust building for all of us. why would any of us sit out?’

‘it’s a trick,’ laudna breathes. ‘a conniving trick. if we are all ourselves—‘

‘but we think two of us aren’t ourselves,’ oryn takes up the train of thought,

‘then we waste time being suspicious of each other instead of just doing what we’re supposed to do.’

‘seems like an apt tie-in to what we hope to do on the moon,’ FCG says, cradled in ashton’s arms. ‘less likely to succeed in our mission if we’re too busy double-checking what everyone else is up to.’

‘fearne,’ imogen breathes. ‘that’s brilliant.’

fearne flips her hair, demurs with a coy smile. ‘of course.’

‘plus, wouldn’t it make us trust each other less if we couldn’t figure it out now and forever more sort of weren’t sure if any of our friends had been replaced?’

‘true, but when you put it that way, that does kinda sound like something nana would do,’ fearne laughs. ‘look out, trap in the mud here.’ orym leans over and drops a white snapdragon blossom where fearne points. ‘okay, third stick, here we go!’

[mysteryshoptls]

SR Grim - Apprentice Chef Vignette

"Let's keep on doing aaallll these fun things together"

[Kitchen]

Grim: It's… It's…

Grim: IT'S DONEEEE!!

Grim: Look, [Yuu]! My super special awesome cake's finished!

The cake looks like a tuna can…

Grim: Yeah! I made it look like the most delicious thing in the world. See how even the word "tuna" looks good?

Grim: As for what I put inside the cake… That's a surprise for when we eat it! MYAHA!

Grim: I bet this is gonna be the bestest thing on the table. We gotta hurry and get it back to Ramshackle!

[Ramshackle Dorm – Anniversary Party]

Grim: Slowly… Slowly…

Grim: Gently, gently… Careful…

We're almost back to the dorm, you got this!

Grim: Gah, carrying a cake so it doesn't collapse is so hard…!

Grim: …But all the guys we passed on the way here from the cafeteria said it totally looked tasty, yeah?

Grim: Y'know, maybe my genius ain't just in eatin' food, but makin' em, too.

Grim: Back when you and me took the Master Chef course, I thought all this work was a pain, but…

Grim: Now I'm thinkin' that it was good we did it. 'Cause now tasty things can be made into even tastier things!

Grim: Myahaha! Thanks to this cake, today's party's gonna be the cat's meow!

Grim: Ah! But that annoying guy Trein is gonna be there… He might get mad if I get too excited.

Grim: Maaan, he's always findin' things to nag me about. Like the other day, he tried scolding in me when I was runnin' in the halls.

Grim: It pissed me off, so I tried pokin' fun at him, but then he just came at me!

Grim: Obviously I ran, but that old man is faster than he looks…

Grim: And then he just caught me in no time, I wasn't expecting that. Just nabbed me by the neck.

Grim: "Try to be a bit more like Lucius," he said… But I ain't a cat, y'know!

Grim: Don't know if Trein snitched on me or what, but even Crewel got mad at me, saying "Stop causing problems."

Grim: But then Crewel whispered later, "If you're going to tease Trein-sensei, make sure you don't get caught."

Grim: Myahaha! Crewel might be a teacher, but sometimes he's got a wicked side. He gets me.

Grim: …Though, he can be a huge stickler if ya mess around in class or get bad grades.

Grim: I remember the other day was pretty scary. He had us all lined up in a row, and was grilling everyone on who spilled the chemicals on the table…

Grim: No one fessed up, and Ace and Deuce were silently keepin' their heads down, so I stayed quiet too.

Well, we all got held responsible, in the end.

Grim: Tch. Trein and Crewel are both way too strict!

Grim: I like Vargas's class the best. 'Cause I don't need to take difficult notes in his class!

Grim: Like the other day, he started going on and on, saying, "If you want to be a great mage, then you need to have muscles as rippling as mine!" or whatever…

Grim: I was just nodding along, and then class ended with just him talkin' about his own muscles. Myahaha, waaaay too easy～

Grim: …Hm? Wait a mo'.

Grim: Do you think… The reason that Vargas showed up here randomly one morning a few days ago to go exercise together…

Grim: DID HE THINK I WANTED TO TRAIN WITH HIM BECAUSE I WAS NODDING DURING ALL HIS BOASTING!?

Grim: The sun wasn't even up, it was still dark, so that was a real pain!!

Grim: …Man, I think I might like Crewel or Trein better after all, ‘cause they don't cause me problems.

[Ramshackle Dorm – Anniversary Party]

Grim: Y'know, now that I think about it, all the profs here are really strange… Is this school really alright?

Grim: Oh. But I think the strangest guy ain't one of the teachers, but Sam. I'm sure of it!

Grim: And that's cause… Remember the other day when I lost at rock-paper-scissors and I had to go buy snacks by myself?

Grim: Before I even got inside the store, I heard Sam talkin' with someone inside.

Grim: But… When I got inside, he was all alone.

Grim: When I asked who he was chattin' with, he said his "friends on the other side," but… WHAT DOES HE MEAN FRIENDS ON THE OTHER SIDE!?

Grim: He wouldn't tell me no matter how many times I asked. It's so eerie. But man, he's got a ton of cool stuff for sale, so I keep going back.

Grim: I remember then, too, before I could say what I wanted, he already had out the perfect number of snacks I had money for.

Grim: Oh yeah, and Crowley came in the shop right after me. Looks like he's always shoppin' at the Mystery Shop, too.

Grim: He started braggin' to me that he gets to order whatever he wants.

Grim: So I told him I wanted some special tuna cans then, and he says, "This privilege is for teachers only!"

Grim: He just kept on bragging, he's the worst! Crowley's so useless!

We should be thankful, since he let us attend here.

Grim: THANKFUL!? He should be thanking me for gracing this school with my genius!

Grim: And I bet Crowley'd gobble down the whole feast we got prepped if I take my eye off him for even a second…

Grim: No way I'm gonna give him a single bite. This time I'll make sure he's jealous of me.

Grim: Hey, [Yuu]. You 'n me're gonna protect this cake with our lives!

Grim: I might not be able to rely on you to do everythin' yourself, so good things we also got those ghosts.

Grim: If all us Ramshackle folk work together, we could even take on two Crowleys. We'll stun him silent!

Grim: I bet the ghosts're feelin' real alive right now. They were really getting' excited for Founding Day.

Grim: They were all, "It's so wonderful everyone is throwing a party here at Ramshackle～"

Grim: They also said that everything's getting' amped up 'cause we came to Ramshackle.

Grim: Myahaha. So that means… All the fun and happy times are all thanks to me!

1. Exactly!

Grim: Yeah. So you just keep on following me, no worries. Grim: As the boss, it's my job to take care of my henchie!

2. I think you're going a little overboard there.

Grim: Myah!? Y-You… You don't get how good I am to ya, huh!? Grim: I'm always pushin' myself hard doin' things for ya. Like, uh… Uh… ALL SORTS OF THINGS!

Grim: So let's keep on doing aaallll these fun things together!

Grim: Ah. Looks like everyone's here.

Grim: Hey, [Yuu], open the gate. We gotta bring the cake in quick!

Grim: I bet everyone'll be so surprised and happy. Myahaha. I can't wait～!

Requested by @butterflyremix.