#i hate the fact that we have to make everything beneficial for it to be good because that cant be right

[player-tag]

i hate the fact that, for some people, you have to make something beneficial for them to get them to actually believe it. "consent is sexy" & "be kind to people because you'll get good luck" & "[conventionally unattractive thing] is actually super hot" etc etc. like, no, most of that isn't true most of the time. consent can be a bit awkward if you're shy and its your first time. complimenting people most of the time wont get you something grand in life. stretch marks and burns and scars aren't always pretty or pleasing to look at. but thats okay, and it should still be done. you do these things not for your benefit, but for other people. because the only reason we as a species have survived is because we are a community, we work together, we live for each other. and thats the benefit for us all.

[whimsicalhorss]

The Recent Nevermore Drama.

Red, I think it's quite sad that you decided to delete all the original comments going against you and reexplaining what went down within your 'apology', which was 95% calling out rather than talking about the cause of the whole uprising. Nonetheless, here was my original reply, just so everybody who stumbles across this post can see the reply from somebody who's viewed it from both sides. The original message was, as follows:

'Hey Red,

I hope you're managing amidst everything that's been going on. I know you've been through a lot recently, and I hate to add to the messages you've been receiving. However, there are some things that I really need to talk to you about.

Over the past few days — even years — I've noticed some things that really concern me. It feels like there's been a lot of blame unfairly placed on certain individuals within your community, which is incredibly damaging, especially when it unfairly paints others in a negative light. I understand you've been trying to address the situation with Crimson, but the approach taken hasn't been effective and has caused more harm than good.

In terms of the Crimson drama, I think it could have been handled more sensibly. Consulting with Laci and others involved would have been beneficial before making the decision to introduce Crimson back to the server. When you were writing your explanation, which I know was rushed, you should have stepped back and consulted for longer - I know you felt pressured, but.. you needed to give yourself time to handle it.

With the screenshots, too - they were only censored to the point of concealing most of the users involved to keep the MINORS safely out of the evidence, and yet you continued to banter on about how they were censored and unable to interpret what happened. As well, you tampered with evidence when you sent a screenshot, CUTTING OUT the part where Laci mentioned they could give you the evidence uncensored if you asked, yet you continued to complain.

On the topic of minors, you name dropped SEVERAL in your apology. Do you know how endangering or scary that can be? It's insane that you felt the need to name anybody involved to get people off your back.

There's also Sardonyx - I don't know if you'll share this with your patreons but, if you do, hello Sardonyx. They casually aggravate people, make NSFW conversation in YOUR SFW server, and you still allow them to pursue in such a way. They continued to temper people after the initial Crimson argument and started their own, which could have been avoided if you had muted both persons involved (rather than banning everybody against Sardonyx) and asked for them to calm down and explain their conflict in dms.

Also the Bunnybel issue - I know the topic was discussed by people banned, but there's also the factor that neither you, nor your mods stepped in to stop it. Matter of fact, you contributed to it, and everybody went along with it as a fun easter event of drawing your two main protagonists in these outfits that, when looked at closer, actually have a much more terrible implication. You should have handled this earlier, rather than blaming it on somebody and ranting about how it's all their fault and they're in the wrong.

Again with Laci, too - you outright blaming her for everything that has occurred is terrible. Whilst that may be what you see in this whole confrontation, in truth, it really isn't anything like that, Red. Saying that everybody else involved were her 'lackeys' and 'twisted around her finger' was an incompetent, foolish way of pinning all these hardships on her. Some people involved, including me, had barely spoken to Laci prior, because a lot of people cared about the fact that YOU had unbanned a potentially alleged pedophile back into your server full of minors. I know it doesn't seem like everybody cared, but we all did, otherwise we wouldn't have started this whole 'riot' thing or whatever to go against it. I surely cared, considering I have been at the face of two pedophiles sending me unsettling, inappropriate images, and I know that it is hard to reach out to somebody or stop them when they shrug it off so nonchalantly.

Lastly, I think it's hypocritical you spoke about how certain groups were stalker-ish and stealing messages from a patreon chat, despite you taking a chat from private servers and dms. The behaviour is equal, is it not? You used your influence to alter certain texts and take them out of context, and the other groups simply took what you said and proved that you, and unpunished, favourited people who have been held dearly, have done terrible things yourself.

I understand that this whole thing has been overwhelming for you, Red, but I believe that there was a real need for you to approach each situation differently, and not to compile everything into an 'apology' that is 5% apology, and 95% calling out people and altering the blame to be put on them. I think that the tactics you used were poor, and I hope that you do figure out something better in the future.

Take care, and I'm here if you'd like to discuss this any further.

Best regards,

A bystander.' And the second reply I made, aimed at one of her patreons (or moderators? who knows.) who put a whole lot of shit behind a paywall and then continued to support her. Aha, Debobble, if it wasn't illegal, I'd show the whole world you trying to make a fake screenshot of Laci 'configurating her hate schemes', and how terribly it was done. 'Hello!

I hope you're having a joyous, maybe even 'whimsical' day!

A lot of things that have occurred recently are the fault of both 'sides' (if we can call them that. Not 'Laci's lackeys' or 'Clique 1 and 2'.) and I think I should refer to the way that this has been dealt with again. 

Yes, the server was owned by somebody different who was capable of banning Crimson, and it was intended for less SFW purposes, but I think Crimson went outright too far in a predatory way. They put a teenage oc with an adult oc, which is pedophilic behaviour, and sent several overly NSFW images. I assume that this chat was intended for 'implied sexual circumstances', rather than overly perverse, but I could be wrong. I agree in the fact that something should have been done, and I approve of Laci's initial reaching out, but I don't approve of the way Red banned them for as little as they did.

As I like to say; 4 months, 4 minors. You afforded Crimson a month for each minor they influenced in such a predatory way, and I think the time should have been extended.

Might I also add, these screenshots were not 'heavily' censored. They were censored for the safety of the minors and other persons involved and, yet.. Red seems to be content with name dropping every minor who was involved. So much for the safety of her members!

AND I have more to add, which I trust you to hand over to Red for me since you seem content to do that quite often for her - do you mind reminding her and the entire patreon and mod chat that Crimson (and Red, I'm pretty sure) knew the age of one 12 year old, who we might call 'Green'. They continued to share NSFW things to them, including making jokes about what I assume was a 'vibrator in public'. How SFW for a child! Crimson is VERY innocent.

I agree that all of this has gotten out of hand, but both responses, from Red, the moderation team, and the patreon chat against the groups banned for involving themselves, but I wouldn't consider it a mob. Both sides had good intentions, it's just the way Red has gone about it - framing others for her mistakes and outright dismissing people for being concerned about the safety, that has made this come to such a volatile level.

And the whole, breaking several TOS, and a law? If thats what we're doing, what are you doing? Leaking private messages, encouraging predatory behaviour, endangering minors, leaking names which could result in a witch hunt from Red's expanse following? Oh dear..

How volatile.

Best regards,

A bystander.' Red, every little detail you have undergone is such a negative, unredeemable smidge to this massive whiteboard of what you could do. Instead of handling this like the adult, you undertake criticism harshly, which is detrimental considering you are somebody who has been writing for years, which means that you should have matured and adapted to take this kinds of things. You could have taken a month, maybe two, maybe three, to explain the whole Crimson thing - it would have been much less detrimental to yourself, and your community. You absolutely wrecked every second, third, fourth, fifth chance people were tempted to give you with every detail that went in to making sure that YOU felt like you had to be right - name dropping, which could lead to witch hunting with your massive following, especially since the people were minors and specifically requested you keep their names out of it. You allowed an alleged, potential predator back into your server without consulting it with victims - and don't get me started on the whole 'Crimson didn't know!', they knew at least one of them, and still continued. You pinned the blame on Laci, on another person (who has asked me not to say their name and, like the respectful person I am, will not be namedropping. That doesn't seem like a familiar concept to you, does it?) and you keep all these little dirty secrets behind a paywall. Red, in the most respectfully disrespectful way, grow up and learn to be better. You spout all this bull, every little detail and, when it backfires, you cower into a corner, guilt trip, manipulate, and eventually resort to the potential physical or mental harm of other people. It needs to stop. The icing on the cake, to all of this? YOU, as the 'mature adult that would never stand for pedophilic behaviour, that loves their audience, that has a server full of minors', that YOU would delete messages explaining the situation in a different point of view. You don't want your vast following to see these and think, 'huh, maybe Red isn't as good as I thought they were?', well they aren't. I don't know if people will see this but, sincerely, I hope Red, Flynn, DeBobble, the patreons, the moderators, and all of the discord and general following of Nevermore and RnF know that what Red spouts isn't necessarily all true.

Kind regards, A bystander.

[genderqueerdykes]

I'll preface this with saying that if you don't feel like dealing with this topic then feel free to delete the ask.

So I have a question regarding the "kink at Pride" debate. Isn't the most viable solution just having two events; i.e. one venue hosts an "all-ages" type and another separate one where everything is allowed?

I ask this because I recognize the contributions that people with kinks have made and I don't agree with the exclusionist mindset, but I'm one of those people who does have trauma surrounding kink. I hate feeling excluded because of that (after all, I'm queer and I've struggled just as much as the next queer person) and I want people like me to be able to participate just as much as those who helped make history. There are those who are able to reconcile their trauma, but many of us can't.

I'm sorry if this is a stupid question. People on both sides tend to be very hostile regarding this subject... and that said I genuinely do understand the anger felt on the side of people with kinks since the talking point "kink doesn't belong at Pride at all" is an ahistorical and TERF based mindset. I just wished that the discussion around this topic was less toxic because I don't want to be exclusive to others nor be excluded myself, and unless I'm missing something it seems like the solution that would be beneficial for everyone is having those two spaces that accommodate both camps (if it is a common thing then that's good, but I've been to several areas and every event was only ever the mixed bag for lack of a better term).

hello there, i think my best answer for this question is this

it's totally okay to want to have all ages events and sections and aspects to pride parades and pride events- in my city pride lasts for an entire week and there are events specifically for kids, and elderly queer folks as well. often times during pride month there will be all kinds of celebrations and i think it's a good idea to have multiple kinds of celebrations

however, you really cannot remove the adult aspects from pride parades and other big main event pride festivals- there is free AIDS testing at a lot of pride fests, free condoms and dental dams, sexual education, other sex harm reduction education and resources, sex toy shops, info on safe gay/trans sex, information on safe kink practices, etc. removing those aspects of pride could be downright dangerous for some who rely on this type of harm reduction

i understand that you have trauma and that you want to express boundaries, that is good- if witnessing kink upsets or triggers you, it's okay to want to avoid it, but pride is going to have displays like that because it is in fact a protest. it is not family friendly, it never has been and it never will be- it spawned in response to police brutality that was happening within queer bars. it is designed to shock you and make you think.

pride is an event that has historically been kinky and included a lot of people proudly displaying that they live alternative lifestyles because they are heavily important to a lot of queers. the san fransisco pride parade is lead by the lesbian leather motorcycle club, Dykes on Bikes, and has been since the late 1970's.

i think it's very odd to focus on kink in specific when there are other traumatizing things that come up at pride- people discuss abortion, abuse, being arrested, beaten by the police, being denied rights adoptive rights and healthcare, and so much more. pride will always have something that will make people uncomfortable, because it is a protest in the street to talk about the brutal reality of our lives

again, as i stated, i am fine with children's, all ages, etc. pride themed events being held but main pride parades, festivals, etc. are in fact designed to be protests, meaning provocative and brutally real. they're not just for waving rainbow flags and saying "yay we love being gay!" it's okay to know your own limits and boundaries but i think that if you know that that's upsetting to you, you may just not be suited for an inherently political event, and that's okay. hope that helps, take care, stay safe

[fangsforiris]

Luck of The Draw

Prompt: Seasonal Depression, Leeches (Melanie Martinez), First Born, That’s Life.

Person: Shuu Sakamaki

HC’s:

🎱 Since Shuu’s the first born, I’d like to assume that he’s seen everything.

🎱 You know that one FNAF audio? “I was the first, I have seen… everything.” Yeah, that’s him and his entire life in a nutshell.

🎱 Everything he’s ever had to work for, he’s always lost 10x the amount of his payout.

🎱 Hence, luck of the draw.

🎱 Melanie Martinez— Leeches— was a big inspo, Shuu 100% has this song on his playlist.

🎱 He relates to it HEAVILY.

🎱 “Strainin’ their artificial, Yappin’ to seem official, Makin’ it beneficial to their cause”— Shuu definitely felt those lyrics in his soul. He only thought of his father, and his eventual corruption, or perhaps him learning of how horrible of a man and a father Karlheinz was.

🎱 He was in denial. Because how could a child want to hate their father? No child would ever want that. And he didn’t either.

🎱 I think it took him some time to accept the fact that Karlheinz was an evil, cruel man, and even more of a monster to his wives and children.

🎱 Christa was proof enough. And I’d like to assume that his heart shattered that day, not only by shock for Christa, but for whatever remorse he could spare. Shuu could excuse anything done to him, but anyone else? Never.

🎱 Shuu’s learned everything he knows by watching his father. Everything Karlheinz did, Shuu did better.

🎱 Shuu’s always been the prized child, perhaps the apple of his fathers eye, before Subaru would come along, that is.

🎱 He wouldn’t feel any resentment persay, more so acceptance towards the fact that all he is and ever will be is a placeholder or someone to be taken advantage of.

🎱 Shuu was the first to see his father act like a father, or at least to his best ability towards him, before reaching his declination state that we currently see him as of now.

🎱 In fact, Shuu’s somewhat seen as a filled cup, always pouring and giving, and never once being offered anything other than scraps.

🎱 That’s how he’s become so burnt out and resorts to his habitual sleeping.

🎱 He has what we call, 3 nap phases. The pre-nap exhaustion, main-nap exhaustion, and post-nap exhaustion— and if it’s really bad then a ‘dessert’ nap or extra spare nap.

🎱 Shuu’s naps go on for 10+ hours.

🎱 They equally drain him mentally and emotionally.

🎱 “How much blood can you draw with your claws, From a flesh that’s not yours?”— Shuu instantly thought of Reiji and his cruel treatment directed towards him. Perhaps he’d lament it on another day.

🎱 Maybe all he could ever be was a useless man. But he’d never be his father. Not the way in which Karlheinz betrayed him so easily. Tossing him aside as if he was nothing to him. No sentimental value, nothing.

🎱 Shuu is 100% an empath and very sentimental towards others feelings.

🎱 Throughout the years he had to numb this side of him due to the strenuous competition for the throne.

🎱 But if you catch him on a rare moment, will he show his side of care— pure, raw, even slightly intimate, care. It felt uncharacteristic of him, but for a moment he felt like the most humane out of the brothers.

🎱 As if he was human once upon a lifetime ago.

🎱 “They’ll find any way, Just to make you stay, Right where they want you, In their piss-covered games.”— He can resonate with Karlheinz and his plan. Never in Shuu’s life, did he want to become a pawn. He 100% tried to get himself exempted in secret. Just something about living his entire life, his entire purpose, just to be a pawn in another one of his fathers games— it hurt, but also upset him deeply.

🎱 He’s done everything in his life to not be like his father or his mother. And to find out that it was all in vain? All for nothing? That’d secretly tear him apart and send him into a comatose.

🎱 Shuu may look like his mother, may share similar panels towards his father, but he was his own person.

🎱 He would grow to become his own king, a better husband, a better man.

🎱 Anything and everything to separate himself from his creators. He wasn’t his own master, but he was definitely his own disciple.

[theabyssqueen]

Chara is our partner, not our victim (rant)

Warning: may sound like Chara hate to some, but Chara is actually one of my favorite characters in Undertale since childhood. I love them. Please keep this in mind while reading this.

Undertale fandom (especially on Youtube and ESPECIALLY Tiktok) try to use critical thought and realise after 8 years that Chara is just as responsible for the Genocide route and is a willing participant in it challenge (impossible)

Like how can you think that Chara is punishing you for your sins at the end of Genocide or is disgusted with you if they helped you throughout it all?

We do not corrupt them.

We do not manipulate them.

Chara is your partner on equal grounds. They make it very clear right at the end of Genocide that you were never in control.

I repeat: we are NEVER in control of Chara.

Treating them as a lost and confused baby without any freedom of choice or thought is a disservice to the character.

Proof under the cut.

The Genocide Run has strict requirements for it to be started. For red text to appear, you need to kill 20 monsters in the Ruins, fully clearing them out. Yet, if you kill the first Froggit you meet, AND 19 monsters, Genocide does not begin. Why is that? I thought Chara was corrupted by all the LV and EXP we are gaining!

It's because Chara doesn't care if the first Froggit is killed or not. Only the monsters after it count.

Additionally, the last chance that Genocide can be aborted is right before Mettaton NEO, at which point, you should be at LV 15. Thing is, this LV can be reached even during a Neutral Run, by grinding 39 Knight Knights in the CORE. Yet, red text still doesn't appear.

Sparing monsters in Genocide is possible and doesn't deter Chara from the Run (but only if it's a common encounter).

Chara berates you if Snowdrake gets away and Genocide is aborted immediately.

Chara keeps count of the monsters needed to be killed and will stop you from advancing further in some sections if there are still monsters left.

They could easily just not do all of that.

Frisk's independent actions out of the Player's control during Genocide are actually not theirs, but Chara's. Chara kills Flowey, Asgore, and Sans. And while an argument could be made for us influencing Chara into killing Sans, the same cannot be made for Asgore's and Flowey's deaths. There isn't even any FIGHT button for us to press. The only thing we are doing at this point is advancing dialogue.

And this is considering that Flowey and Asgore were/are both Chara's family, or at least akin to one.

Listen, I get it. I also hate when people put all the blame on Chara. I also dislike when people just stamp "evil" onto them and erase all possible nuance. But that doesn't mean that we should go right into the opposite direction and act as if they're innocent or righteous.

At the end of Genocide, no matter your input on the matter, Chara ends the world. Not just you, not just the monsters still left alive in the Underground, but the whole universe. That indescribably outweighs all the misdeeds we have done during the Run.

Just think about it. Is really killing EVERYONE in the world justifiable, if you do it to punish someone? Even a murderer? To make them "see the consequences of their actions"?

How does that make sense?

How does that elevate them from you in any capacity?

Is it because they talk of "perverted sentimentality", which evades even them? Chara only talks about it if you try to return to the world you had a part in destroying. Chara only talks about if on the 2nd+ Genocide Run you do not comply with erasing everything.

In fact, if you play along, they compliment you. And they don't say anything about your feelings on the matter.

Killing and erasing is encouraged. If you do so, in Chara's eyes, you are a beneficial and trustworthy partner.

And the photo. The photo that appears at the end of Soulless Pacifist if you leave Toriel. Instead of Frisk, Chara is shown, and everyone else's faces are crossed out, implying that they are dead.

Some argue that this is just Chara trying to scare you, or remind you of all the murder you've committed, keeping you responsible.

Alphys is scribbled out.

It is impossible to kill Alphys in Genocide.

It's possible she kills herself during some pretty bad Neutral Runs. Not to mention that, in general, a lot of Neutral Runs are just as, if not worse than Genocide.

Why won't Chara guilt trip you for having done them, then?

And I just can't wrap my mind around someone thinking that Chara is literally pulling a "just a prank bro" here. Especially considering that this is never shown or hinted at to be the case.

And as the icing on the cake, look at the text that appears after the end of Genocide in the Undertale Demo:

To me, at this point, thinking that Chara is innocent is just denial.

Yes, Chara offers trying out a different route next time. Yet they sure as hell won't stop encouraging it if it is started all over again. No matter if it's the 1st, 2nd, or 100th time you decide to kill everyone to wipe out the world, Chara will play along. This is considering the fact that their dialogue changes on the 2nd Genocide, and thus, proof that Chara's memory is unaffected by RESETs or ERASEs.

Yes, Chara says that YOU were the one who lead this world to ruin. But in my opinion, considering their offer for you to try out a different path, and their actions in Soulless Pacifist (which are, again, out of their own volition and unprompted), Chara's ultimate goal is to take over your/Frisk's soul. Which is why the point fingers and erase their contribution in all the murder, to try and make you feel guilty for it, seeing how you clearly do not wish to part with this world so easily.

Evidently, they've succeeded.

Chara would never get what they want at the end, if not for your help. And you wouldn't get what you want, if not for Chara's help.

The Player and Chara are partners. Let's never forget that.

Credit to the Undertale Text Project for the screenshots and to the nochocolate blog for opening my eyes all those years ago. I love you nochoco.

[littledollll]

Lucifer vs the hound

Lucifer x little!angel!reader (mini fic)

A/n: the hounds name is Onyx and r calls it nix (or doggie) when tiny cuz it’s easier ofc, this was originally in “babbles” but I realized how off topic it got and quickly regretted it so I made them two separate fics!

Warnings: little anxiety, crying

♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡

Looking around you frowned. “Doggi?” I’m trying for hours and the damn hound was all it took? Lucifer mused to themselves. (More like complained.)

Lucifer had been trying to get you to slip for the past few hours, coming up unsuccessful, only for you to part from them to “visit your hound friend” and when you came back believing it was with you, you were regressed.

“Hounds are not allowed within the private areas of the castle my darling, that’s why you’ve only ever see it outside.” You pouted, giving Lucifer a look of disapproval they tried so hard not to smile at. “Why no?”

“This is hell tiny, hounds much like everything else aren’t always the kindest, they respect me and other rulers, but very rarely anyone else. But of course you being your charming little self managed to get chosen by one, I’m not surprised.”

“was chosn?” You questioned. You toyed with the sleeves of their clothes, making Lucifer smile as they allowed you to take their hand.

“Hounds don’t get tamed, little angel, they chose you, that one chose you.” Moving on form your adorableness, Lucifer explained. “yous jelly?” you giggled when they raised a brow at you. “Of the hound?” you nodded.

“Oh I sure am, I mean two seconds with a hound and you slip but not with me? I’m wounded.” You couldn’t hear the sarcasm or playfulness in their voice, it made you frown, and your eyes welled up with tears. “ii hurt?”

“Oh sweet one, no don’t cry, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean it like that, I’m not hurt little angel, I was just joking, okay?” Lucifer wasted no time in getting back to your room, you both know how much you’d hate to be caught crying, specially small.

You cling to them like you always do, but once you were back in the safety of your own room you didn’t let go. “It’s okay little angel, lucis okay, you nor anyone else has hurt me.”

“You really do like the hound-“ you interrupted them with a sudden change of attitude. “nix!” Lucifer gave you a slow nod before continuing.

“You really like Onyx so, what if we make a little exception and allow it to your room?” You hesitantly nodded, of course you wanted that, but you were still unsure on how Lucifer truly felt, you didn’t mean to hurt them, you never wanted to make them upset.

“We can work on that tomorrow then, precious. You do understand I wouldn’t be offering if I had an issue with it, right? It’s completely fine darling, I don’t mind you and onyx getting along.” They put more emphasis on his name just to show they remembered, making you giggle and nod excitedly.

“In fact it’s beneficial for all of us, you know Onyx can protect you when I’m not around, and he’ll keep you company, so truly, he’s quite the help. I promise you have nothing to worry about, little one.” Lucifer ended their statement with a kiss to your forehead.

“Mm! Da an an nix frens!” You were dead set on making sure there was no rivalry between your two favorite beings and Lucifer gave you a nod. “Yes precious one, friends.”

[lovezbrownies]

Thank you, cruel savior.

Based on this ask!

A/N: this was so much fun to write >.< I loved this idea so much I had to squeeze out a fully fledged fic! Enjoy!

Word count: 746 words.

TW: mentions of Physical and psychological torture, mentions of murder, one sided hatred, barely mentioned Gen oopsie daisy! bit of angst, bit of fluff

Reina’s job wasn’t easy, tend to a psychotic temper mental murderer who’s overly obsessed with her ‘’lover’’, a person whom she kidnapped, imprisoned, and killed people for. It wasn’t ideal, but Reina had to pull through, her parents need treatment for illnesses, and younger siblings to care for. Even if she’s stuck in a lonely quite mansion with a mentally broken person, she will make sure her family are happy, safe, and healthy. Even if it’s assisting the imprisonment and subsequent mental and physical torture of this poor innocent darling.

Speaking of, the first few weeks with Gen’s toy were painful. Staying quite while someone begs at your feet, sobbing hysterically, asking to be let go, asking to be killed, anything to ease the atrocities they have to deal with. Reina is human, of course she would feel bad for you, who wouldn’t? But dare she do a thing, what will happen to her family? What will Gen do to her in general? The last time someone tried to save you it ended with Reina having to clean up so much blood, having to somehow get rid of the stench of infected wounds, blood, and dead carcass.

It wasn’t worth it, Reina would tell herself in a mantra. They have everything in the world, so what if they’re completely isolated, only being able to talk with a deranged woman for barely 2 hours before they’re dragged off to the master bedroom? So what if I can hear the bloodied screams and cries of agony even all the way across the mansion as that poor creature gets tortured endlessly? I don’t care if they’re locked up in the basement after I had told my mistress of them attempting another escape. I don’t care. No, I don’t.

I don’t care so much so that I sneak them food when they’re being starved intentionally, taking them out for walks in the morning in a nearby park whilst my mistress is at work. I don’t care at all, no, in fact I don’t care what happens to them that I intentionally have sharp cutlery lying around. I actually hate them, but why do I hate them? Best to find out by talking with them about anything that comes to mind. I should get closer to Gen’s sweet darling so they don’t get any ideas on trying to escape obviously! I only do what my mistress tells me to! Which is to ensure her darling’s safety and to stop any escape.

So why am I running? Running so fast and hard, with you tripping trying to catch up to me, me holding your soft hands whom I fell in love with after months of caressing and comforting you. Ah, right. I’m running towards my house, with a bag full of cash that will keep me afloat for up to a year. I’m running so I can save you, my dear, take my family with me, and escape past the borders of Xelera, your home country, but not mine, never mine. We will go to my country and arrive safely by god’s mercy, my country and yours never got along, which is even more beneficial.

I am sorry, I am so sorry, I had hated you in the beginning, blinded by the witch’s beauty, I had risked your life numerous times, and you got hurt because of me, but now I will right my wrongs. I will make sure you, me, and my family are all safe in my childhood home, be warned though fair darling, it’s a bit cramped. But that’s okay, I love it when you’re squeezed against me. I know as soon as we enter the border’s of my gloomy country, the skies will clear and the sun will shine brighter because of you. You light up my life and my heart. I may have saved you, but you saved me as well.

How I adore you, you tortured soul. Here I am, writing this all down as to not forget, we reached our destination. We found our childhood home, and now as I’m writing this, you rest on my small bed, snoring. I am so happy, with you, with my family, with myself. I have never been this happy, you made that possible my dear. You light up my world, I hope to live the rest of my life with you by my side, I love you, dear.

-Reina Aranis, your love and light.      Xoxo

November 7th XXXX

[livelaughghoul]

Logan Sargeant Personality and Career Tarot Analysis

Disclaimer: This is for entertainment purposes only, nothing observed or taken away from this should be considered fact. As a reminder, I know fuck all about Formula 1, I just like fast cars and have a dumb amount of knowledge of astrology and tarot. 

This one is just for me, no one asked for this, but guess what? I want this. I have a soft spot for Logan because honestly, he reminds me of a kicked puppy and I kind of want to wrap him up in a blanket and give him some spiked hot chocolate and make sure this child feels love and happiness for once in his goddamn life. 

My knowledge is limited, but from everything I have read, Logan is being mistreated, and I hate that. Yeah, this is more for me than anyone else at this point. I have a soft spot for him because he’s an American, but my husband's name is also Logan, I am out here collecting men named Logan.  Anyways, I stuck with the personality questions just to kind of see what baseline I could establish, but I also wanted to see what his future looked like, and I pulled two cards for this, for his current career and his future career. I’m going to work on his birth chart too, which will probably be uploaded later today or tomorrow (did anyone ask for this? No.). 

What I will say about his reading is that there are A LOT of Pentacles, like an overwhelming amount. Pentacles are very earth-focused energy, with an emphasis on the home, family, and things of value. I think that it is fair to say that these are some of the most important things for Logan, the things that he holds closest to him. It’s probably the things he takes into consideration when making decisions. 

Outward personality - Knight of Pentacles

I actually really love this card for the outward personality, because it’s such a stubborn and strong card. I believe that we see this card come through in how he handles everything that is thrown at him, he remains mature and levelheaded through everything. There is a stubborn and dedicated nature here, that almost borders on obsessive. I get the sense that everyone who meets Logan can immediately see his dedication and hardworking nature, how dedicated he is to his career, and being the best that he possibly can be. 

Unfortunately, I think he was put in a position where he was not utilized or given the tools that he needed to actually meet the standards that he set for himself. While we are usually our own worst enemies, I get the feeling that he destroys himself because he isn’t meeting his own standards that he has set for himself. 

Inward personality - Four of Pentacle, reversed 

So this one hurts a little because it’s the card of possession, control, and resisting change. I get the sense that Logan holds things close to his heart and feels deeply. The resisting of change was something that was probably learned over time and almost became a defense mechanism. This card really points to there being a lot of insecurity and the need to hold onto things when they feel good or beneficial. Change is inevitable, especially with the career that he is in, but when it does happen, it takes longer for it to feel like reality. 

Current career - Four of Swords 

I like this for his current career, it’s reflective of preparations, and contemplation. Obviously, there is a lot of unknowns going on with his career, and there is a hell of a lot of speculation going on. A lot is happening in the background, to work through the next steps and build a plan. It’s something that isn’t being taken lightly at all, whatever choice he makes, it’s going to be something that he has thought about for long periods and likely has had long discussions about with those that he feels closest with. 

This has me feeling like he is in a transitional period in terms of his career, and he’s just setting the future up for it to be something amazing. 

Future career - Two of Pentacles, reversed 

I don’t mind this being reversed when it comes to the future career, because this is about flexibility, adaptability, and finding fun in things. I think that this is a really good indicator of how things are going to go. I have a feeling that Logan already knows what the plan is, but he is holding it close and not sharing those details with everyone. I think that there is a shift in his priorities, I think there is going to be a huge emphasis on his wellbeing, and this is going to be a priority for him. He is going to shift into something that makes him happy, we’re going to see authentic happiness and fun being had, but it’s still going to challenge him and push his limits. 

[lonelyvomit]

Abby! I'm going through the songs competing in the Norwegian national final and these three made me think of you:

Gåte - Ulveham Mistra - Walzt of Death GOTHMINISTER - We Come Alive

I'd love to hear your opinions even if you hate every single one 😄 But please don't feel pressured if you have no time or interest to go through these 🖤

there's gotta be something in norwegian water because god damn.

Gåte - Ulveham: holy. shit. I'm gonna start off with the fact that I don't generally listen to female vocalists, they just don't usually do much for me (preference or internalized misogyny, I'll never know, it's just how it works for me), but this is fucking amazing. I will always have a soft spot for folk metal, the vocals are powerful and unyielding, and there's potential for an absolutely brilliant stage performance here. the fact that this song is giving me strong visual ideas in my head based purely on the delivery even when I don't understand a single word and have no music video to build these ideas on says everything. it fucking delivers.

Mistra - Waltz of Death: this one unfortunately takes a big hit from that distaste for female vocals that I personally have, and is a perfect example of where an objectively talented singer just doesn't work for me. this one being in english also makes the lyrics understandable, but I cant really say that to be beneficial here tbh - the song doesn't really say anything. the words sound pretty, but there's little to no story there. it feels like they're banking heavily on the emotional delivery, but it's not quite doing it for me. I absolutely love the idea and creativity in mixing classical vocals with heavy black metal inspired sound, and I could easily see myself loving this act if it was delivered by a male vocalist. but I also wanna acknowledge that since most people don't share that issue against female vocals with me, I could see this doing perfectly fine overall and be a very interesting act for the general ESC crowd.

GOTHMINISTER - We Come Alive: eheheeheheeheehhee THIS IS MY SHIT!!! I was headbanging 40 second in. regardless of what happens to this act in the elections and if they go to ESC or not, I'm adding them to my music library right now. the vibe, the vocals, THE AESTHETIC? I'm obsessed, I'm fed, I'm living, injecting this song directly into my bloodstream as we speak. gothic horror metal Nicholas Cage didn't just come knocking on my door, he drove a freight train right through it. voice reminds me of Chris Harms from Lord Of The Lost who's voice I absolutely adore too, but with the darker lyrical themes Gothminister is even more my thing than LotL was.

as a summary, my favorite is definitely Gothminister, but being fully aware that my preferences rarely align with the majority, I'm just gonna say I wouldn't be mad if any of these wins. I've really liked Norway's entries for the past 3 years lmao, I'm excited to see if they keep it up ✨

[redstringraven]

11 and 12

*crawls back over here after work week* >:J!!! thank you!!

(also, please excuse that this ask is visually a bit more of a mess. apparently i wrote too much for tumblr to be chill with my usual formatting. apologies. e-e;;; maybe it'll let me format it after the fact. it did not)

TMNT's 40th anniversary ask game!

11.) which version of raphael is your favorite?

like i said in the tags for the meme, it's obvious/a given that my favorite version for all the turtles is gonna be the 2003 one. but since i also said i won't stop/discourage y'all from asking anyway AND said i don't have a favorite out of the boys, i'll use this as an excuse to babble incoherently about some of the reasons i love them. it's not uncommon that i enjoy hot-headed characters. this could partly be because enneagram-wise i'm a 9, and we're the 'odd one out' when it comes to the anger/gut triad (i kind of touched on this concept in my enneagram series; apologies). so, while i often smother my own temper, i still feel it under the surface. i get being angry. anger is also often a secondary emotion--it's an emotion that comes up because you're attempting to disguise something else; "anger is easier" as some quotes may say. i find it interesting to squint and find out why we're 'angry'. what's actually going on? when it comes to '03 raph, i don't think his anger stems from any ONE thing, i think it's more a bundle and that's part of the reason it's so easily set off. a significant piece of it is probably due to things i discussed in his enneagram post: learning to recognize the world is cruel/uncaring and trying to find ways for him--and the few people he cares about--to survive. raph is also a very intense person. anger is an intense emotion. it makes sense that he'd find comfort turning to it when he otherwise can't identify or articulate what he's really feeling. and this isn't to say he's not emotionally intelligent (far from it), i just think he struggles to slow his head and heart down to put names and words to everything flooding him--and WHEN he struggles, he gets frustrated and impatient with himself, which just makes him struggle more. and i appreciate the handful of examples we get that in-series where he can't quite verbalize it, but you can still feel and see it. i think raph likes to take care of people. his brothers, master splinter, april, casey, tyler, mrs. morrison, angel--whether they're someone who he loves, or someone who can't fend for themselves, or both, he just seems to instinctually take people beneath his wing. he's still learning that vulnerability doesn't equate to weakness (you can't show weakness in a world that rejects you), and he's also still learning to harness and manage all those emotions when they turn to anger--steer them to something more productive and beneficial instead. because anger, itself, isn't inherently bad. it's what you do with it. this is something he struggles with at the beginning of the series but seems to get a better grasp of as the seasons pass. i love raph as a hot-headed character who's a marshmallow inside not because of the trope itself, but because it feels very real to me given the circumstances he grew up under, lives under, and how he views the world and how intensely he loves. he's not just there to be "the angry one" so we have that archetype on the team, there're reasons. it's both a strength and a weakness of his. one he's aware of and carries shame for. my man also has an excellent sense of humor; right up my alley. i love him very much but i've already talked a lot and should probably stop here. … also, he hates bugs and got fucking swallowed by one and proceeded to chest-burster his way out of it, like. we love to see a short-king winning and getting to reference a movie he probably loved in the process. talented, brilliant, incredible, amazing, show-stopping, spectacular, never the same; yee-frickin'-haw indeed, sir.

12.) which version of donatello is your favorite?

copy/paste that first paragraph from the above answer here.

hilariously, like how i seem to have a pattern of enjoying hot-headed characters, i also feel like i have a pattern of loving the more quiet and compassionate ones. this also probably plays into my 9 on the enneagram, since 9s tend to be peacemakers and our place in the web allows us to better see the perspectives of others. i, also, understand the struggle that comes with not wanting to 'rock the boat' and kind of keep those i'm surrounded by happy and chill and secure. but don's also SMART. and i've been a nancy drew reading/game playing bitch since i could read. puzzle-solving… mysteries… cleverness… GIMMIE THAT SHIT.

don was my favorite as a kid, and i think that came both from the fact he was 'the purple one' (joking that was a bias was half of a joke; shut up i was like thirteen) and because he was resourceful, clever, and observant. i loved his kindness, i loved how when things seemed dire he'd usually be the one with an idea, and i probably saw a lot of myself in him whether it be in playing mediator between my siblings, or in knowing a lot of seemingly Random Shit™ about a lot of Useless Things™, or in the simple fact that he often wanted to be left alone to do the thing(s) he was really passionate about. i got a lot of flack for all the time i spent on the computer as a kid. didn't matter if i was writing or drawing or reading about topics i wanted to learn more about--you know, productive/creative/thoughtful activities--i was constantly badgered that i was addicted to it and didn't spend enough time with my family. i guess any moment that don having a weird interest in something "paid off" was validating to me in a way? as well as him not being the strongest fighter, but still being valuable in the team unit (i'm an artist who grew up in a family of athletes). i also appreciated and admired that despite his kindness, he wasn't a doormat. definitely a do-no-harm-but-take-no-shit kind of guy, and lord knows teen!hannah needed to learn to stand up for herself better. so, yeah. i think as a kid i saw a lot of myself in don. i appreciated him for existing in that way.

all that obviously still stands as an adult, the 'favoritism' has just faded away as i've grown to understand and adore the other three more.

don's pretty outstanding, man. while he's usually the route of the pacifist, it's evident that he has a clear line in the sand, and once you've crossed that line… you're gonna realize that when you fuck around, you find out. and you're gonna find out very quickly.

he'll take what little he has around him to scrap together a breathing apparatus for a lost and brain-damaged triceraton (even though the triceraton was previously an enemy), he'll spend months trying to find a cure for a bunch of strangers he barely knows, he's able to empathize with a bunch of child-like nanobots… but at the same time, he'll also blast you with your own arm-canon, drill you into a pile of mulch, trick you into going to a hornet dimension, and verbally assassinate your dignity for all that it's worth.

i love that so much of him IS grounded in creation. making things. learning and understanding. and that kindness is often one of his main driving points. i just wanna take his shoulders and shake him sometimes. in the most loving, motherly and enthusiastic of ways.

…i also firmly maintain that he's physically the strongest out of the brothers. that detail, combined with him being the least competitive out of the four, really amuses me. because i like to think that when it comes to arm wrestling, someone might challenge don because they think nerd = weak. and don's initially not interested in humoring the challenge, but his brothers are behind him like ":)))c no. no, donnie you should do it. it'll be fun!" because they all know. and don's finally just like

… e_e … fine.

and proceeds to slam the other person's arm down before they even know they've lost. his brothers stand there with gremlin smirks, impish grins, snickering, mischievous boyish giggling, and don wanders off unceremoniously to get back to a project. he's got a lot to do today but this was a nice break.

[alternatefandom]

Right, so I (ariciabetelguese, on my main) was having a discussion with @addictofanimation on Alhaitham's actions towards Kaveh, but I don't wish to clog moonilit's notes further. So I invite you to continue our talk here, shall we?

First, allow me straighten out a misperception: I never claimed that Alhaitham doesn't care about Kaveh. I've stated that he does care, in an inept way ("he's clearly trying his best from his limited perspective, so kudos for that, I guess?"). But I still think what Alhaitham did was borderline cruel, and this is where I'm coming from.

In my youth, I was a lot like Alhaitham. Half the fandom cleanly pegged him an INTJ, and I am, too. He values rationality and knowledge, and so do I. He's practical and pragmatic; so am I. His insight can cut people to the quick, causing him to conflict with people; so had mine. Nobody liked to go up against me, and truth be told, I was perfectly content that way.

Alhaitham said he is not a leader. I agree. Here's where we differ: Alhaitham is not interested in exploring that, while I was.

So out of curiosity, I led people, despite hating every second of it. Here is what I found: 'tough love' as you called it only works if you can make sure the person was picked up afterwards. Pain is a great teacher, but only if you're treated after. Otherwise, there's a big possibility that the other person will actually be set back in their journey of healing, and if you get yourself cut off, there's really not much you can do to fix that.

And until the Palace of Alcazarzaray was built, Alhaitham was never there to pick up Kaveh, nor was he there to make sure that someone else did. I'm not even sure if he tried to apologize; was there a lore bit I missed somewhere? After all, to this day, he still takes digs at Kaveh's very ideals, the things he prided himself on, although people still disagree on whether or not Kaveh takes these digs seriously. Regardless, I don't think much of Alhaitham's methods, and seeing as Kaveh remained a stubborn idealist who literally gave up everything for Dori's palace, we can see that his methods didn't work out all that well, either, so... yeah.

When you are your own worst enemy, it takes a friend/family being real with you to snap you out of it. The best way to tackle illogic actions/thoughts is with logic and reality. Alhaitham didn't let Kaveh believe a lie (that it was somehow his fault) and used logic against it.

And yet.

Alhaitham had seen through the reality that he had never been able to face, causing him to feel reality's bite for the first time, a feeling that made Kaveh steadfastly declare that he regretted making friends with this all-too-intelligent person.

Kaveh already knows. He didn't even waste a second denying Alhaitham's words because deep down, he already knew. He was simply not ready to face it; he didn't know how to do so. To reiterate: as a whole, it's not a logical trauma, so it's not so easily solved with facts and logic. If it was, a brilliant engineer like Kaveh would've solved it easily.

What Alhaitham did was like telling a depressed person that they have no reason to be sad because they have too much to be grateful for in life. Detangling an illogical trauma is not that simple. Does that mean Kaveh was too sensitive? I guess, in the same vein of people who's just been wounded are too sensitive, geeze, why did you shout when I poured alcohol over your wound? After all, alcohol is good at cleaning wounds, no? What I did was a good thing!

Once again. I'm not saying that Alhaitham doesn't care about Kaveh, or that he wasn't trying to help. I'm saying he's incredibly inept at caring, and he ended up hurting more than helping during their fight. But then again, he was still young and inexperienced at the time, so I won't blame him too much for it. In the end, I agree that his friendship with Kaveh could be somewhat beneficial; both of them could learn from the other's example. After all, they're each other's reflection :)

[prettygirls-grave]

becoming a muse

the ethereal nature of some beautiful people- inspired by Heaven Sent Honey's video on Youtube, "The Anatomy of a Muse."

1. channeling your truest nature

what makes someone a muse? what makes one so special it inspires the artists and creators of our world to immortalize one fleeting soul? history's muses are ethereal, unique, and completely distinct. a muse is self-possessed, and complete control of their disposition and demeanor. they are aware of themselves, who they are, and how they carry themselves. a muse must inspire, and inspiration isn't found in those who are unoriginal.

create your own universe. do what you like and don't feel obligated to explain it. be yourself (corny, i know) and embrace everything about you. put your style and personality of full display, and never include those who are undeserving into your orbit. you must know yourself and identify how you want to be perceived. you must detach from the judgements and opinions of everyone, and never shy away from showing them who you are.

2. atmosphere

going hand in hand with being totally unique and otherworldly, muses are able to retain their own distinct aura which can only be found around them. once a muse knows who they are, they are able to create their persona, the mirage that an artist or a lover becomes infatuated with. for some, personas are unnecessary, while others indulge in remaining a mystery.

decide what feels right, or what is most beneficial. having a filtered image of who you are for the public and those bewitched by your soul, keeping your true self sacred, or letting your whole being shine, allowing others to love you for who you are completely, with no doubts. both options have their undeniable perks, so for those who find it impossible to chose, i opt for being my true self around those who i find worthy. what is the point of showing everything to those too ignorant to understand, or those who simply don't care? remember to always love your true self, no matter how you decide you'd like to be perceived.

3. movements

the mannerisms, movements, and overall flow a muse is one of the most efficient ways in which they capture us. they move in a way that makes us watch them, makes us stare, and makes us want to understand how they move the way they do. the way our muses move makes us wonder if perhaps it's a science that we simply can't grasp.

in fact, the science of movement is quiet simple. be present and aware of your inherent beauty, and move slowly, with purpose. the key to grace is confidence, and not the boisterous, flashy sort, but rather, self-assuredness. be sure in everything you do, in every move you make. don't let yourself fall into anxiety and doubt.

4. physical

while a muse's aura keeps the artist enchanted, we cannot deny the power of physical appearance. the physical is what captures our attention in beginning. at first glance, a woman's big eyes or lovely lips causes you to stare, or perhaps a man's defined face or unique nose leaves you thinking of him for the following week. a muse is aware of their physical being and their features, and loves themself. because each of us is unique, and the muse prides themselves in highlighting what makes them different.

look in the mirror. are you dissatisfied with yourself physically? do you ever find yourself hating what you look like? it's completely normal, but it really shouldn't be. to combat self hate and reach your full muse potential, find beauty in the way you were created. you were not designed in order for you to hate your body or get plastic surgery.

accent what makes you physically unique. makeup, jewelry, clothes, hairstyles- use what is at your disposal to create an appearance which when you look in the mirror truly feels like it's you.

to be a muse is to be like a tiny god, a force which inspires creation

[butts-bouncing-on-the-beltway]

Could we see the southern gothic playlist, please?

Oh shit, I missed this, I'm sorry!!

I don't really know how I would share the SG playlist given the current format of it, but everything on there is also on my main playlist! So like. If you don't mind also learning about the REST of my absurd music preferences, you can probably pull together your own.

If I ever do manage to share the SG playlist specifically, I'll make sure it goes on Tumblr too lol

To be fair, tho, it's actually a lot easier to find southern gothic music than you'd think, it's just that you have to be willing to ignore the fact that a lot of people who DON'T LIKE southern gothic are going to mock the aesthetic for being "cringe" or whatever as just like. A cultural staple of socialization?? So some of the artists you get recommended are artists that a lot of people are used to reflexively belittling without knowing much (or anything) about the artist or thekr music. It's not uncommon to really need to push past that "why the fuck would I listen to THEM" response that a lot of us have sort of gotten conditioned into us. Country genres tend to be like that, is the thing. It's this weird combination of people managing to find an angle from which to hate on the majority of country music and its musical dialects, no matter what their socio-cultural position is. And like, yeah, not every country dialect is gonna be for everyone. But if you aren't actually willing to listen to The Devil Went Down to Georgia with an open-mind and a curiosity towards its narrative role in our collective oral tradition, then why would you seek out The Devil Wears a Suit and Tie, or Bottom of the River, or Love's Death Bed?

The barrier I think a lot of people (especially in progressive circles) experience in trying to actually get into Southern Gothic is the Southern part. There's this real mental and emotional block people have around the idea of Southern aesthetics being compatible with their ideological and political concept of "being a good person".

And like. Fine. But that makes it sad how often some of the same people will purport to love Southern Gothic but have a hard time finding enough. That happens when you exclude its originational context from your environment. It's not a bad thing inherently or anything just....an implicit bias that I think a lot of people still carry with them and don't really flag for themselves as being anything other than beneficial for their judgement and decisions.

Anyway. I really hope people DO get more into southern gothic as a whole! It's a great scene and there is such rich metatextual conversations to be had and experiences to revel in! But some of yall may have to get comfy being uncomfy if that's what you want to do

[pommunist]

So sorry for the random vent in your ask box Pommunist, but I just keep seeing peoples posts about saying goodbye to the fandom and while im so glad to see so many people had such positive experiences with interacting I myself didnt really see much of it. I dont know if its cause im just more of a lurker and so I wasnt really making friends and memories with people around the qsmp but I honestly saw an overwhelming amount of negativity and even negativity mascaraing as positivity. Being in this fandom did not teach me togetherness it only taught me just how cruel and mean people are. Over all I honestly dont feel like qsmp reached its goal to bring communities together if so much of the fandom is volatile and actively will attack fans, ccs, admins, just about anyone. There was so much zenaphobia both in the fandom and in the studio. Purgatory was so poorly put together the streamers were having live disagreements and fights (that they thankfully usually got sorted quickly but was still DEEPLY awkward to witness and many people would just leave, wait for the fight to get worked out and come back) and not to mention how angry the fandom was over EVERYTHING at the time. And all that was done ON PURPOUSE. How can we say the the QSMP reached its goal of brining communities together when that simply did not happen? People are still split up in "the Brazilan fans" "the French fans" "the English fans" ect. Like im sure SOME people feel like THEY got something out of it and thats great but dose that mean that OVERALL as a full whole that the QSMP did that? Id argue no.

I’m going to say something that I almost never say lmao but I think a lot of it isnt Qstudios fault.

A lot of it is tied to the nature of twitch stream in as a storytelling medium. Take a normal TV show, people will still find ways to argue all the time about which character is in the right, whether or not a plotline was good etc. And they’re all watching the exact same thing.

With twitch streaming, people have their favourite characters and everything they see is from their pov, which is biased by nature and ultimately lead to a lot of misunderstandings, especially when everything said goes through translation.

Now add to this the second thing which is that some people got into qsmp with zero interest for it and its goal. They were first and above all else a fan of their favourite ccs, and never had any intention to open their mind to anything more than that.

Meaning that for them, everything that was beneficial to their fav, they liked, and everything or everyone that wasn’t, they hated.

Purgatory was the perfect event to lethally mix these two together, which wasn’t helped by that it was a poorly thought out and poorly executed competition event with high stakes (or so we thought at least lol).

Then you also have the xenophobes/mysoginists/shitheads who will just throw hate based on discriminatory reasons or simply because they’re assholes. I’ve seen takes that genuinely had my jaw touching the floor, but that’s the thing when you merge communities, the bad ones come along everyone else sadly.

On top of that they also ruin the fun for other people which lead to some just wanting to stuck with the community they were already a part of before qsmp.

On the other hand, QSMP still allowed people to share parts of their cultures with each other, pick up and learn each other languages, make people who would have never met without it befriend each other.

Personally before it I had never watched English or Portuguese content on Twitch, and now do regularly. I didn’t know any of the streamers besides the French speakers, Fit (watched his vids) and Rubius (only bc he was against the french in the pixel war), and now I’ve discovered many amazing ccs.

I was able to discover and learn a lot about how people do things in other countries, met cool people that I would’ve never met. My opinion on this is probably partly biased due to the fact that the specific communities I’ve been active in are almost comically all peace and love but I’ve also seen a lot of shit, just chose to focus on what was good.

I think QSMP fandom is kind of like if you and a bunch of strangers from around the world were shoved together in a bar. Most people are going to talk and drink and have fun together, but some of these strangers are bond to be assholes who will talk loudly and look for a fight, making the night a bad experience for those who stood near them.

So yeah I think QSMP achieved its goal to an extent, and built bridges between communities but the experience was soured by some who either didn’t care about crossing that bridge or even tried to actively sabotage it.

[lumine-no-hikari]

Dear Sephiroth: (a letter to a fictional character, because why not) #120

I did so much stuff today!!!!

…Okay, well actually I did only like 3 things today. But these things were very BIG things! I will talk about two of them, and then touch vaguely upon the third!

I will start with this morning! Because J and I went up in the sky in the little airplane today! We went to an airport that had a diner! I got an EPIC BREAKFAST!!! There was steak and eggs and cheddar grits, and I also got a coffee, because I don't get coffee very often, so why not! I took some pictures for you…

This is what J got! It's some kind of breakfast bowl with salsa, avocados, beans, and scrambled eggs! There's also potatoes and bacon under the eggs! I wonder if you'd enjoy something like this. He let me have a few bites; it was really good!

Here is the coffee I got! And, of course I snapped the picture of it while the cream was still swirling around; it's more interesting that way:

Here are some cheddar grits:

Here's the steak and eggs I got; it came with caramelized onions, cornbread and butter, eggs with runny yolks, and a bit of hollandaise sauce! It also came with ketchup for some reason. But I only like it on burgers, so I didn't use it.

I asked for the steak to be as rare as allowed, and I was SUPER THRILLED about the fact that they prepared it in basically the same way I do at home - brown the outside, and leave the inside mostly raw:

It was so good!!! Oh my goodness!

While at the place, I also happened upon a little space with dandelions! I'm not really sure why, but people in my world seem to really hate dandelions. It makes absolutely no sense to me, because in addition to being extremely beneficial to nearby soil for a variety of reasons, every part of the plant is edible and nutritious. One of my favorite things to do, when I can find a safe source of them, is to turn the blooms into a sweet syrup that you can use on pancakes, on ice cream, or in tea! Maybe I'll get to do that this year. For now, I'll just show you the picture I took:

Isn't it pretty? I like them!

I also took a bunch of photos along the way from the airplane window! I'll show you the best ones!

…Hey, Sephiroth? I know you can fly and stuff, and that's pretty cool. But while you're up in the sky, dancing in the clouds, do you make it a point to notice and appreciate all the lovely scenery? If you don't, then maybe you can try it next time; practicing gratitude and appreciation is one of the best ways to exercise your hippocampus until it becomes strong!

On the way home, I saw 9 great big huge birds-of-prey; I think these ones were turkey vultures. I managed to actually catch a picture of one in flight for you! Here, it's not very big in the photo, but check out the back speck in the sky:

Oh!!! Also!!! I finally got around to making the stuffed cabbage casserole today! This recipe was given to me by an awesome person called @freelanceexorcist (thanks be to ye, fren!! 💖)! I ended up modifying it a bit, just to suit the needs of those in my house; Br cannot have gluten, so I used tomato puree in place of tomato soup, and J does not like big cabbage leaves, so I cut it into little slices, and bite-sized bits are easier for M to handle than meatballs, so I kinda just... shredded everything and mixed it all together. But I used mostly the same ingredients, even if the preparation differed just a little! I'll show you what I did…

You start with cabbage!

Here's how it looks on the inside when you cut it in half!! It's pretty cool!

...It's like Brussels sprouts, but WAY bigger!

The recipe calls for whole leaves, but I cut it into shreddy bits, like this:

The cabbage was sauteed in my bacon fat confit garlic:

I poured in a can of tomato puree from there, and I let it simmer on low heat for a couple of hours:

While that was happening, I cut up 2 pounds of kielbasa, and 2 onions:

Once the cabbage was done and set aside, I caramelized the onions in more bacon fat:

I added the onions to the cabbage, and then I put a big can of diced tomatoes, a pound of Bavarian sauerkraut, and the ground meat I cooked the other day into the wok, along with a cup of rice and a can full of some beef bone broth:

I let this sit on very low heat until the rice was done cooking. I used short grain rice; it looks like this:

...In between the long bits of cooking when there was nothing else I could do, I worked on something else that I'm absolutely not going to tell anyone about! It was good!

Once the cabbage and the rice were all done, I combined the two sets of things; this took some doing simply because there was SO MUCH FOOD, oh my goodness!! But this was the result!

So... it's cabbage, caramelized onions, sauerkraut, canned tomatoes, tomato puree, beef bone broth, rice, garlic, kielbasa, ground pork, and ground beef, all cooked up nicely and mixed together in a great big awesome dish!! And it is indeed awesome!! It was said that the leftovers are even better, because the flavors are given a chance to mingle; I can't wait to find out tomorrow!

...I wish you could have been here for all of this. I wish you could be here, generally. My house does occasionally have its challenges, for sure, but still, it is happy, wholesome, and safe. There's lots of fun and interesting stuff to do. My house is a good house. You could find healing and belonging here. You could find growth and change here. And you'd fit right in. You'd fit right in with my social circle, generally; ain't a single one of us fit the definition of "normal".

Sephiroth, c'mon. The darkness doesn't suit you. It never did. And it never will. So step away from people who wanna use and abuse you, and instead step towards the people who wanna help you to feel as though you're enough exactly as you are, without needing to do something useful or amazing first.

I'll be here waiting, so... as impossible as it is, pop by for a visit soon, okay? We'll make you good snacks - all the pasta you could want, or whatever else suits your fancy - whatever you like; if I don't know how to cook it, I can figure it out, easy peasy.

I'm gonna go do other things now, and I'm going to wish you were here as I do them. I love you, and I'll write again tomorrow. Please stay safe.

Your friend, Lumine

[sleepless-rants]

hiihii sleepless!!!!!!!!! any thoughts on the way the key concepts in mostly every (because i was. really not conscious during the inazuma) region's archon quests so far have had one or more of their key concepts encompass a KEY endgame-esc lore concept in one way or another>>??

hihihiii ok I love this question sm lets see (also so sorry for the long delay I've been really busy with stuff lately :'D )

Mondstadt: it WAS the first ever quest in game so I think we spent it learning about how the rest of genshin is gonna be more than anything. But if I had to point out a few 'hmmmm' moments:

1- wtf was the abyss order trying to do in controling a corrupted dvalin exactly? We're told they're trying to use him for their evil plans and then that they had plans to 'utilize him' in the trailer with lumine riding a ruin guard. I mean it all traces back to the loom of fate obv but I've been curious to know what that specific part of the plan was about. Anything to do with dvalin is suspicious to me bcz durin.

2- the entire conversation we had with venti at the end of the archon quest. The whole talk about allogenes and how they can acsend to godhood, the fact that venti and the cryo archon used to be on good terms but now havent spoken for centuries, etc etc honestly when in doubt just go watch that part again it gets the brain gears rolling.

3- the fact that an archon's power comes from the number of people believing in them.

Liyue: ngl the liyue quest was so boring to me I was half asleep while doing it so I might've missed some stuff BUT

1- the very end of the quest and the contract zhongli signed. I know that archons dont exactly love their gnoses and would probably trade it for a jolly rancher if given the chance BUT the trader was still a fatui harbinger and if zhongli's even a quarter as smart as nahida is he would ask for something beneficial in return. So yeah I rlly wanna know what the contents of that contract were I think it will be important going onward.

2- the fact that zhongli did ALL THAT just because he wanted to free his people from his reign retire and wanted to make sure they were ready for it is really telling. Time and time again we see how much archons themselves hate celestia and the system they've created. In the latest fontaine aq we even saw the lenghts some of them are willing to go to for destroying this system and I have no doubt this is going to mean something big in the future. (i mean keep in mind we have THREE godless nations now. Mond, liyue and fontaine archons all set their people free. As much as I love to meme abt archons vs khaenri'ah you have to give credit where credit is due.)

(It actually becomes key concepts from here instead of things I have questions about bear with me)

Inazuma:

1- VISION BEARERS LOSE THEIR MINDS WHEN YOU TAKE THEIR VISION!!!! the explanation inazuma aq offered was that its because visions are directly linked to a person's ambition, lose your vision = lose your ambition etc etc BUT DID ANYONE REALLY BUY THAT??? also if that's the case what about the few cases of people who lost their vision but were perfectly fine still????? Itto???? That one guy in the tea house who even says it was as if a huge weight had been lifted off his shoulder?????? The granny in wangshu inn???? Visions are getting more suspicious with every new aq.

2- delusions take away from their user's lifespan (not that It matters for any of the harbinger's other than childe and regular fatui soldiers so probably not as important as the vision thing but yk)

3- honestly the whole concept of eternity and time (which we got to explore more in ei's second sq) "eternity is the closest thing to the heavenly principles" what do you mean raiden. What did you mean by that. Dont even get me started on the whole pocket dimensions thing and how time flows diffrently in diffrent corners of teyvat. The fact that the future affects the past more than the past affects the future. Everything is litterally upside down.

Sumeru: every line that was said in the sumeru archon quest ever.

1- Descenders exist. And they are not affected by irminsul changes. Speaking of which,

2- I CANNOT STRESS HOW IMPORTANT THIS IS AND HOW MANY THINGS IT MEANS FOR THE LORE!!! IRMINSUL CAN BE WIPED OF CERTAIN INFORMATION! AND THE ONLY WAY TO MAINTAIN THAT INFORMATION IS TO WRITE IT IN THE FORM OF A STORY! A FAIRYTALE! LOOK IN YOUR ARCHIVE PEOPLE! LOOK AT THE BOOKS! READ ANYTHING ANDERSDOTTIR HAS WRITTEN! READ THE PALE PRINCESS AND THE SIX PYGMIES!!!! READ THE FLOWERS FOR PRINCESS FISCHL!!! READ THE BOAR PRINCESS!!! READ THE MOONLIT BAMBOO FOREST!!!! GRARRAGAGAGGA

3- our twin is somehow native to teyvat (not a descender) while we are not. This is very much smelling of someone having messed with irminsul information. Either they wrote our twin into the irminsul files or they removed us. I used to lean towards the second one but after perinheri and learning khaenri'ahns welcomed people from outside teyvat im not so sure.

4- the entire forbidden knowledge and king deshret plotline. (King deshret/king irmin/nibelung parallels drive me insane on a daily basis. The fact that people affected by forbidden knowledge develop SCALES on their bodies literally do I need to say more.)

5- dreams are a seperate realm in teyvat. I dont see people talk about this enough despite how important the concept of dreams is in this game.

6- forget about information PEOPLE can be wiped off irminsul. Thats fucking terrifying. They cant wipe themselves but if a powerful enough person (ahem hexenzirkel ahem ahem dainsleif ahem) decides you shouldn't exist anymore you just...dont.

7- teyvat samsara cycle/ time loop confirmed. This is litterally a 500k word theory post of its own so imma just leave it there for now.

8- COLLECTIVE CONSCIOUSNESS!!! THE ENTIRE IRMINSUL COULD BE A COLLECTIVE CONCIOUSNESS!!! TEYVAT COULD BE A COLLECTIVE CONSIOUSNESS FOR ALL WE KNOW!!!

9- nahida wanted to get rid of the gnoses on her hands especially the electro one. Keep this in mind for the fontaine list.

10- sustainer of heavenly principles has been inactive since khaenri'ah. Hmmmmm

Fontaine: aka the only god khaenri'ahns pray to is focalors.

1- focalors my lovely lovely woman. We dont have a hydro archon anymore that is insane. Seven archons and only two of them are actively moving against celestia smh. (Also is it the six now instead of the seven?)

2- GNOSES ARE THE REMAINS OF THE THIRD DESCENDER!!!!! WDYM!!!!! CELESTIA REALLY STOLE A DESCENDERS CORPSE AND STOLE THE DRAGON'S POWERS AND MADE LITTLE BATTERIES FOR THEIR ARCHONS. WHO EVEN IS THE THIRD DESCENDERS

3- TWICE now gnoses have been said to "cause problems" if they remain where they are and so they are handed over to the fatui. The second time could've been excused as neuvillette not wanting a celestia device near him if it werent for the first time with nahida. What kind of problems are we talking abt here?

4- heavenly principles inactivity further proven by the fact that one of their archons TRICKED THEM FOR 500 YEARS, KILLED HERSELF, DESTROYED ONE OF THE SEVEN THRONES, HANDED THE POWER BACK TO A DRAGON SOVEREIGN and nothing happened. Are they dead? Like actually?

5- dragon sovereigns can be reborn/ have descenders. Nibelung/ irmi- *gunshot*

6- this was said in the sumeru interlude chapter also (or was it wanderer's sq I dont remember) the fact that you cant change fate, but CAN change how it affects the world.

Apologies if this is a bit incomprehensive I wrote this just at the top of my head (probably I should've re-read the aq voicelines akajskam) but there you go. The ultimate "archon quest things to keep in mind" list.