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#i have used 3 so far lmfao
b33viemm · 7 months
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Oh, Crowley. Nothing lasts forever.
Crowley's magnificent hair :D click for higher quality IDs in alt inverted versions below cut
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why didn't anyone tell me that Hannibal is a comedy
#its absolutely Absurd lmfao#'you wouldnt like me psychoanalyzed' SIR????????#what is he??? autistic hulk??? s i r ?????#i really didnt expect them to reveal Yeah Hannibal is The Cannibal literally in his first appearance#i thought it was gonna be like... Hinted at... maybe the reveal is in the season finale or a later season#NOPE. they were immediately like 'yeah heres our main villain. hes a therapist. everyone likes him. hes so sus but no one picks up on it'#and then. fuckin. will didn't make it One Episode before eating human meat#will describing the 'copycat' killer's work as Art etc & then we cut to hannibal smiling at this description#motherfucker isnt slick. this is hysterical#every five minutes theres a reference to the copycat or cannibals or whatever#and immediately theres a shot of hannibal standing off to the side like 🧍#HES SO FUNNY AND FOR WHAT#absolutely unprompted#god and hannibal. like. bringing link sausages to feed will's dogs. what in the cartoony ass villain fuckery is this#its Also funny how like three different people - including hannibal - are trying to rizz up will#so far the only one actively succeeding from what i can tell is hannibal#and then - then fuckin. will is all like 'i feel responsible for abigail 🥺' and lowkey hinting that he wants to take care of her#smash cut to hannibal making her his murder kid. the fuck. hes so transparent#hannibal 'abigail is a bit like both of us<3' lecter#and him continuously having dinner with jack and jack being like Ohhhh This Dinner Is So Good Whats The Meat#hannibal: *suspicious pause* rabbit#theres just so many funny moments from all of the characters#all functionally unintentional. but still. love this show#i was gonna finish naruto or watch warrior nun but fuck!!! didnt do that!!! watching the gay subtext cannibal show!#literally in the first ep when will was like 'this guy is killing and eating women bc he loves them' i was Immediately like#ohhhh so this is like A Killer Per Episode show. bc theres no way thats hannibal lmfao#also jack and wills dynamic... jacks like 'this is my special little guy <3' and then points to will whos huddled shaking in the corner#this show is so entertaining. i expected it to be boring. its fuckin weird and i Like It#i hope it gets sooooo fucked up. cant wait for hannibal to really lean into the manipulation to convert will to Murderism. its already begu
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home from work
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#if I speak…#one of the girls walked out yesterday#the best worker we have is on the verge of blowing up on this bitch’s leaders bc since he can do everything quick and efficiently already#they’re putting 3 to 4 ppl’s workloads on him to see how far they can extend his worth and then they’re over his shoulder the whole time#micromanaging him so today he almost lost it and was literally walking around mumbling about his disrespectful they all are (facts)#and how if they don’t think he’s doing it right then they can do it and I know for a fact one of the ladies heard him#bc he wasn’t even trying to hide it at this point and like this dude is cool he has a lot of patience and helps out any way he can#so if HE’S on the brink of snapping then the rest of us don’t stand a chance LMFAO#anyways today was a fucking mess those leaders know nothing about our store yet so they have us making less than what we need until we need#it so we get behind constantly and they made prep a disaster bc again they think they can just prep a bunch of stuff in the morning#and it’ll last the whole day and yes that works in theory but the reality of the situation is every day is different and today#we sold double what we did yesterday so they had to move me to prep to fix their mistakes bc we were running out of stuff 4 hours in lmfao#and I’m the only one left who knows how to do everything on prep bc the other girls had never done it before#we’re supposed to prep 20 mac n cheese trays in the morning for the whole day#we open lunch at 10:30 tell me why I go into the cooler at 12 put more in the oven and there’s only 5 left#it’s been less than 2 HOURS and you’re already running out of macs which means those idiots prepped barely anything just to try and save mo#*money to cut down waste but that gag if you’re losing money bc now you’re short on everything and customers are leaving bc they’re having#to wait a long time for their food#and macs take 40 minutes to cool LMFAO#I get over there they’re out of parfaits they’re out of fruit cups they’re out of kale salads the front is coming in and having to take#stuff as I make it bc they keep getting orders and it’s all just a fucking mess#I have to make a custom wrap and what happens?? those morons didn’t pull the flatbreads out of the freezer like they’re supposed to every#night so now we have no flatbread and I had to run back there and put them in the warming drawer to defrost and we lost an order bc I had#nothing to make the wraps with <3#I go back there to get more cold chicken SPOILER ALERT they didn’t have anyone make any this morning so now there’s no chicken for the wrap#and salad and it has to be grilled and then chilled for 2 FUCKING HOURS before it can be used#they’re a fucking disaster like 😭#was the store perfect before?? ofc not but it ran quickly and efficiently as it should and now it’s literally just a mess#this bitch hasn’t even owned it for a full week yet and has already fucked it all up#womp womp!!!!!!
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unproduciblesmackdown · 7 months
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spontaneous dig for marble hornets gamers from this decade < ago event, i guess aptly everyone seemed pretty elusive in the limited documentation but they were ready for "sickos show up for their sick little mask purchases" it seems
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So it's almost 3am here
Ace texts me out of the blue with very deep, intense childhood trauma stuff over discord. Meanwhile, he's supposed to be in another state hanging out with friends for the weekend, having fun.
So obviously I'm concerned--like this is stuff he hasn't brought up in a LONG time--and after responding appropriately, I'm like, "Dude, odd things to bring up when you're supposed to be with friends. You good over there?"
There's a brief beat.
And then he goes,
"Being high is weird."
Y'all I have never laughed so loud in my LIFE
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kaeyaphile · 2 years
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the lead veterinarian has made four out of our ten employees working today cry, myself included, so it's safe to say that i cannot fucking wait for tomorrow when he is not fucking here 😭👍🏻
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bobzora · 1 year
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the pain and suffering of being extremely interested in a game's story while the game's gameplay is tedious and not fun.... wanna finish it so bad but also really don't want to at all thank you very much
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theghostofashton · 2 years
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fitzykreiner · 2 years
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my new swimming binder fucks if i do say so myself
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orcelito · 2 years
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haha sometimes ur on a flying ship for a fancy dinner with all these important people and ur getting an Examination (???????) from this scientist lady who noticed how Weird you are during the dinner. clothes off but LEAST sexy fucking experience ever. 
but while this is happening ur spider climbing vampire friend went poking around the bottom of the ship & found a cool bead and decided to BREAK. IT. oh whoa what do you know it’s a FIREBALL. THAT EXPLODES THE BOTTOM OF THE SHIP. KNOCKS HER OFF (OUR ONLY HEALER!!!! PROBABLY DEAD!!!!!!!) & BLOWS A BIG HOLE IN THE SHIP.
so everything is Panic & we leave our rooms & find the fiance of our wizard poisoned on the ground, not dead but we have no idea what’s going on, our healer is missing, the ship’s medic is MURDERED, & the wizard is on the top deck with the captain and OH LOOK the big lion guy starts attacking the captain & almost killing her then and there.
some running around later, I go up to the top, cast charm person on the guy, SUCCEED IN CHARMING HIM, but our rogue is pissed & throws a knife at him, which I intercept (taking 9 damage, which isnt Nothing considering how squishy I am) so the charm doesnt break. me trying to push the dude back, trying to Talk the situation down, since a fight is NOT gonna end well for us,
and then. the monk. was given a teleport ring. which she activates. & it lets her send 8 people to a place of her choice - which she chose the Peach Pit, aka where Fang works and lives. 
Fang, the paladin, the princess, the rogue, the wizard, the wizard’s fiance, the captain, and the monk’s friend. NOTABLY not the monk herself, nor the rogue’s friend. 
teleportation is Fucky. a few get there no problem, a few of us take damage (another 12, which is NOT. NOTHING...) then show up where we were meant to go. i get teleported across the fucking MAP but at least im alive and im going running to the Peach Pit cause that’s where my SHIT IS. so naturally im gonna meet up with them at some point. captain got Knocked Out then teleported Somewhere. we just gotta hope some good samaritan finds her and helps her bc we sure as fuck have no idea where she is. 
somehow my charm is still up! so MAYBE the people on the ship will have a chance at talking down the situation. who knows! 
BUT. wizard is Pissed at the rogue for almost messing up the charm, pulls his sword on her. rogue is confused and pissed and Scared bc her friend isnt there & now there’s a sword being pulled so she’s pulling her daggers. im ACROSS THE FUCKING MAP, & the only other ppl on-site are the Paladin, the princess, & the passed out fiance (who’s essentially just a civilian). 
yeah. Yeah. uh. this sure is Something lmfao. 
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loganlermanstanaccount · 11 months
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Hello! Could you please write a stubborn, jealous hc for Miguel o'hara? Thank you!!
I had the brainworms, so I hope this is what you were looking for! Thanks for the ask <3
Jealous!Miguel O'Hara Headcanons
(AO3 Mirror), Main Masterlist
pairing: jealous!Miguel O'Hara x reader
summary: stubborn HCs for jealous!Miguel O'Hara. 
a/n: this was meant to be a drabble and i basically wrote a full fic. i have zero self control lmfao
warnings: smut (fingering, f receiving oral, slight brat taming, etc) right at the very end, 18+ from then onwards, the rest is more pg-13
wc: 3.5k ish
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Long story short: he's a stubborn little shit.
Pig-headed as fuck and it shows up in little things. 
Let's say you first met as coworkers, and you were a lab technician at Alchemax. 
Think: unstoppable force meets immovable object. He likes his labs just so, with very specific equipment in a very specific configuration. 
It drives you crazy, regularly having tiffs outside the labs; much to the chagrin of your coworkers. 
"Jesus." Your coworker mutters, wincing at the seemingly heated argument by the water cooler. 
"Ignore it, Maeve." Another coworker rolls their eyes, nudging Mave with a snort. "They're at it again . S'pose they'll tire each other out by the end of the day."
Not that they were wrong. But this time, it wasn't your fault: dealing with O'Hara's bullshit had really taken it's toll. He was insufferable, prone to nitpicking and just plain mean. You could hardly be blamed if you gave him some of your own choice words. 
"My notes were basically paint-by-fucking-numbers!  How could you mess up a simple distillation? When I specify precision glassware , you don't think that's fucking important?" 
"Your notes ," You draw air quotes pointedly at him. "-are illegible, you fucking cretin! Maybe if you didn't write like a goddamn pre-schooler-"
"- preschooler? Oh , fuck you!" 
"Get your nose out of that highschool Chem textbook, O'Hara, this is a fucking job."
"Yeah? Stop using it to wipe your ass and you might learn a thing or two."
"Oh , so that's what we're doing?" You laugh in his face, so angry your hand curls into tight fists. You get close, staring him down as you look upwards through your lashes. His own face is contorted into a grimace; bushy eyebrows furrowed into deep shadows around his eyes. You can feel his steady breathing before he speaks, low and rumbling. 
"I could do this all day, princesa. " 
You scoff, ignoring the way his words weaken your knees. The one time you asked for a break during a long lab and he won't stop calling you a spoilt princess. His laughter then stings in your ears now, the ghost of a smirk on his face as you storm off. Miguel O'Hara: smug bastard. He would be the death of you, you're sure. 
~~~
You spend many a late night with him, unwittingly, and find out he's more than a stubborn little shit. 
You find out he's funny, and shares the same anti-Alchemax tendencies you do: both preyed upon by the company immediately after graduation, young and naive. 
He's kind, even though he'd never admit it, often finishing up the lab notes and doing more than his fair share of work so you can go home at a reasonable time. 
You both still butt heads, but it turns into a tentative friendship - coffees in the morning hidden as blaise convenience, covering for each other at work, and defending the other when office gossip goes too far. 
That's why when he comes back to work after a week-long stint away - something about a blow up with the boss, an issue described as 'miscommunication, promptly smoothed over' by anyone official - you notice… something's different about him. 
You first noticed something was off when he walked in without a snide remark. You left a mug overnight at the counter, something that would usually draw a sarcastic comment at the least , but he gives you… nothing. Blank, glassy eyes as he opens up his workstation - clicking away at the keys without so much as a glance.
"O'Hara?" You call, but he doesn't even look up. You walk to his workstation and knock at the desk. He jumps. God, he looks worse for the wear. Heavy bags under his eyes and a bruise blossoming under his collar. 
"You okay?" 
He rubs his temples, eyes flitting up at you.  "Yeah, just…. just a long week, s'all." 
You put a hand on his shoulder, and you swear he leans into your touch. "We can reschedule, tonight. The calculations can wait, Miguel."
He gives you a weak smile, but a smile nevertheless. "S'okay. Need to make sure you don't fuck it up."
"Don't push your luck, O'Hara."
~~~
As you get closer, you notice just how stubborn he is to admit the growing tension between you two. 
Late nights at the lab turn into takeout at your place, morning coffee turns into a pleasant 20 minutes on the rooftop away from the hustle and bustle - just you and Miguel, talking and joking with a cup of shitty coffee in hand. 
Wholly, he seems more assertive at work, not as quick to roll over. 
It's hot, you have to admit; watching him fight with someone else other than you. 
You're at work drinks with the other technicians and engineers, nursing a watery beer when another colleague makes small talk with you at the bar.
You’ve never been that close to him, and the conversation is amicable enough, but you’re almost bowled over when you see Miguel, in the corner, staring straight at you with a stormy look.
You suppose it's a little pathetic, getting all dressed up for a casual drink. Lips shiny with gloss and gently powdered with makeup, you feel a little out of place. For all your talk at work, actually being here was another thing. Suddenly, your blouse is too tight and your skirt too short. With a manicured finger, you trace the lip of your glass filled with watery beer. You sigh. You don't want to admit it, but you were only here because of Miguel. He said he would come, and now you're sitting on a barstool counting the chips in your glass. 
It was probably for the best. You sink into the absentminded chatter of your colleagues around you, until there's a tap at your shoulder. 
"Is someone-" He clears his throat; a tall man dressed in a sharp suit nodding gracefully towards the empty chair. "-is this seat taken?" 
You shake your head, grateful for the company. He's handsome, sharp features curving into a wry grin as he calls for a drink. 
"...and something other than shitty beer for the pretty girl, too." It makes you laugh, light and lilting in the bustle of the bar. 
He stretches out his hand, and you take it. 
"Eddie Crouch. I work in marketing."
Eddie…. as in… head of the most profitable division of Alchemax? Your eyes widen involuntarily and you try to clamp down your immediate shock, somewhat unsuccessfully. He narrows his eyes as you tumble over your words. 
"Y-Yeah, same! I mean, not same , I just work in the l-labs and I thought it was just for us guys, working behind the curtain, y'know? Not that we're not thrilled to have you here, because we a-are." You spill out, wincing. "....Is this about the performance reviews? Because I know output was down this quarter but our projections are-"
"I'm not here to talk about work." He chuckles. You squint, not convinced. As if to alleviate your concerns, he loosens his tie and undoes his top buttons with a flourish. 
"Can I tell you a secret?" He leans in, and the air becomes thick with expensive perfume. He twirls the signet ring on his finger, a ring probably worth more than your monthly paycheck. 
"Your boss invited me," Discreetly, he stretches a finger at your boss; a man ruddy cheeked and red-faced with alcohol. "Guess he thought it would boost morale. He's a fucking idiot if he thinks having me, the one guy that could fire your entire department without recourse, exchange empty platitudes would boost morale. But, I digress. So here I am, dragging my feet to this bar, thinking I'm gonna get in, read the lines and get out. But then, " He pauses with dramatic effect. "I see the most beautiful person I've ever had the pleasure of laying my eyes on, just sitting by the bar. Like everyone isn't already falling over themselves to talk to you."
The irony is palpable. It's sickly sweet, and a line that wouldn't usually work on you. But usually, you weren't pining over a man so prickly and stubborn, you shouldn't have feelings for. Here you were, bright cocktail in front of you and a moderately attractive man by your side. He wasn't quite Miguel, but in the words of one of the greatest thinkers of the past age: country girls make do. 
And so you make lazy conversation with the man. So lost in a tipsy haze, you barely notice Miguel walk in; dark jacket on his shoulders and deliciously loose slacks. You're drawn to him, his eyes seemingly searching the room, and you sigh into your drink. Technically, he looks like shit: eyes dark-rimmed and sunken, a cut at his brow. You think he is gorgeous, eyes tracing the slope of his nose and plush lips. Like he can sense it, he glances over in your direction and you look away hastily. He's watching , you can feel its burn as you turn, pretending to listen to the man besides you. A little cruelly, you lean into him, not breaking eye contact and curling a hand around his arm to laugh at a stupid joke. Eddie laughs with you, oblivious, as you glance behind him. 
Miguel stands with a drink thrust into his hands, looking straight through him, eyes low and gazing at you. 
~~~
He insists on walking you home, a steady hand on the small of your back as you stumble through the streets of Nueva York.
You make light conversation, tipsy and giggly from the alcohol. Miguel seems a little more put together, but his chest still creaks with rumbling laughter.
He definitely walks on the side of the pavement nearest the street, because he thinks it keeps you safer. 
He walks you up the stairs and by the door of your apartment, like a gentleman. You watch him get nervous suddenly, and he hesitates, stubbornly digging in his heels and pausing you from opening the door and coming in. 
You don't want it to end, opting to take the walk up the stairs as opposed to the lift. It's one of your more questionable decisions as you stumble up the stairs, almost tripping over your own feet. Miguel is quick to catch you even though he was just as drunk. Arm around your waist, he leaves searing touches to your hip. You giggle despite yourself, and he can't help but smile at your clumsiness. 
"If you break your legs I won't carry you, princesa ." A lie and you both know it. He would carry you to the ends of the earth like a blushing bride, if you asked him. 
You both stagger to up the stairs and through the corridor until you reach your front door. You rummage around your bag for your keycard, it's contents click-clacking in the quiet of the hallway. Miguel watches, quieter than he was in the journey. If you looked up now, you would see something else behind his eyes - a storm of apprehension and tension. 
You find your keycard, and look up to find Miguel placing a careful palm on the door. He's surprisingly still, eyes on your lips as he steps closer. You look everywhere but to meet his eyes, tracing the curve of his collarbone, the slope of his exposed forearm, and the tempting juncture of his strong jaw. You watch it tense, as he brings a gentle hand to your chin. His thumb swipes over the fat of your lip. 
"Got somethin' right… there." He mumbles, before tucking his hand away. You can barely breathe. Without thinking you take his hand in yours, lacing your fingers together like a gentle hug. You bring his hand to your waist, and he squeezes, ever so gently. Your hand drops and he moves his slowly, knuckles dragging along the smooth silk of your blouse, and then sending shivers when he reaches your bare neck. 
He has to bite down the plethora of things running through his head - his drunken brain threatening to spill all his thoughts. You are so beautiful and soft it makes him short-circuit, desperate to pull you close. Instead, you do: hand inching up his chest and laying to rest on his shoulders. 
He kisses you, finally ; a little messy and impossibly soft. Like his lips on yours would shatter you both. You deepen the kiss and wrap his arm tighter around you, angling your chin to drink up even more of you. You both come up for air, panting in the heat of one another. Miguel's eyes are full of lust and blown out. 
"Do…do you want to come in?" You whisper. 
Something catches in his throat and his expression changes, like he just woke up from a dream. Do you just want to sleep with him? He's not built for one night stands, can't do just sex, especially if it's you. No matter how much he wants to, he can't, he won't, "....I shouldn't."
The disappointment on your face is palpable. You want to ask why - after he kissed you like that - why doesn't he want you? Instead you nod dejectedly. He gives you a chaste kiss on the forehead, lingering, and a shaky smile. 
You open your door with a buzz, and slam it in his face. 
~~~
It takes Miguel some time to properly put a name to what you two have: not knowing if the kiss was a drunken mistake, animal attraction or something more. 
He's not a grand gestures kind of person, he believes in action rather than words. 
Which is why it takes so long for him to admit just how in love with you he is. 
He steals glances at you all the time at the office, and tries to anticipate  all your needs. 
When you stretch and yawn in the morning, he happens to pass by your favourite coffee place and happens to buy one too many cups of your go-to order. 
So imagine his shock when he arrives from his lunch break, churros and coffee in hand, and there's one of the top brass from the night at the bar perched on your desk - 2 polystyrene cupfuls of something half drunk on the desk. 
He's never been insecure, but he can't help but feel possessive, something tense and tight growing at the base of his stomach. 
"What was it you wanted to talk about?" You step into the equipment cupboard, Miguel close behind you. You rub your temples, anticipating an argument. "O'Hara, if this is about my calibration tests this morning, I swear to God -" 
"No, no , nothing like that." He's quick to say. "They were… okay." He strains. 
You raise an eyebrow. Okay? Since when did Miguel pass up an opportunity for a mindless fight? Your mind races with his actions of the past few days. He has been different since the night at the bar, a little nicer, sure, but nothing this out of the ordinary. 
"That guy you were talking to. I saw him at the bar, and now here. Who is he?" 
Your eyebrows shoot up. "You do not have the right to ask me th-" 
"Are you fucking him?" A pause, and you study his expression, deducing that he is completely fucking serious . 
"Are you insane? You definitely don't have the right to ask me that." You make for the door, and he steps in front of it, blocking it with his body. 
"I need to know. Tell me and then I'll leave you alone, I promise." His voice is low and thick with something. 
You step closer and he wraps his hands around your waist absentmindedly. The pressure feels good, and makes your brain fog up. 
He repeats himself, softer. "Are you fucking him?" 
You look at him for a moment, before shaking your head. His facial expression  is steady, just as unreadable. 
"Do you want to?" 
You hesitate, wanting to be cruel and say yes, just to see his reaction. Perceptive, he sees your hesitance and says something that almost knocks you over. 
"I could fuck you better than he ever could," He kneads your thigh now, lips close to the shell of your ear in the tight space of the cupboard. " Princesa , look at me." 
You look at him, almost whimpering and putty in his hands. He's like a siren and you are lost in the pull of his gaze. It may be the proximity, but you swear you see a tinge of red in his eyes, like deep pools of lust. 
"Will you let me fuck you?" He pulls you closer so the meat of his thigh presses against your clothed cunt. Your stretchy pencil skirt rides up suggestively, and you rock your clit against him, searching for sweet pressure. You nod. 
Miguel titters softly, a hand on your chin pulling your lips to his. You moan into his kiss, body aching. It's hot and heavy like the kiss outside your door, but he swirls his tongue around yours and expertly nips at your lower lip. He guides your hips to rock against his thigh, tensing to make sure it's corded muscle hits the right places. He wants to break you apart, leave you so cock-drunk, you wouldn't think of even glancing at another man. 
You separate and he dips a hand under your skirt. He pulls it up and places a big palm at your pussy, with a well timed slap. You bite into his neck with the pressure. You definitely don't expect it when he rips open your stockings like they were paper. 
"Fuck, Miguel." 
"It's okay, baby, I'll get you new ones." Your eyes roll back as he slips aside the gusset to run a finger through your lower lips. Shamelessly, he slips a finger in, then two, basking in the wet squelch of your heat. You claw at his forearm, as he curls them into that sweet spot. 
You press your forehead to his shoulder, chasing his fingers with your hips. His sharp eyes watch every movement, every stutter and start that his fingers pull from you. He's practical, a man of action, and he is desperate to show you how much he cares. 
"I've thought about you… about this." He hisses as you cover your mouth to dampen your moans. 
"Wanted you for so long, princesa. Want to know how you taste, what this beautiful pussy feels like. What you look like when you cum."
His wrist aches with the back and forth motion but his pace barely faulters. 
" M-Miguel …"
He applies pressure to your clit, and watches in awe as you spasm, nails digging into his forearm. 
" Oh, there it is. Right there, hmm? Does that feel good?" 
You nod frantically with a stifled sob. 
"Not quite, baby. Need to hear you say it. Or I won't let you cum."
"...fuuck you."
" Oh, you'd like that. Still not what I want to hear. Tell me how much you like it when I fuck you with my fingers."
"F-Feels good." You stutter. He stops, wrenching his hand out of your pussy to leave you clenching around nothing.You almost scream.
"You're being a brat, not my princesa , hmm? Only good girls get to cum."
" Miguel , please. I'll do anything." He guides you along his thigh, still lodged between your legs, and licks up your wetness on his other hand. "You m-make me feel so good. So good. And I want you so much it hurts, sometimes. I just want to cum, don't even need your cock. Fuck me with something , please." 
"Miguel? Not asshole? Or fucking idiot, this time?" 
"Please, Miguel ." Your pleas go straight to his cock. He throbs with need, cock rock hard under his slacks. 
He relents, not able to bear your dopey puppy-dog eyes for much longer. He slips three fingers in, without bothering to prep you. He hisses at the tightness of your heat, pounding into you and knuckle deep with his fingers. Shamelessly, you fuck yourself back on them, hips rolling over his thigh. He can't tear himself away from the sight, palming himself through tented trousers. 
You kiss and nip at his neck, as he whispers obscenities at you under his breath. 
"Can you cum for me, princesa? Cum f'me, and I'll take care of you, I promise."
You clamp down on his fingers and moan into a kiss as you ride out your orgasm. It's intense: leg-shaking and leaves you shuddering in the aftermath. You were rusty, sure, hadn't had sex with someone in a while. But Miguel made you cum so hard you saw stars, with only his fingers. Your chest heaves with the thought. 
You thought he would leave you, torn stockings and all, in the little cupboard. But he stays, to sink down to his knees and lap at your folds. You rest a hand on a shelf for purchase, head back in bliss. You cunt is still sensitive, throbbing at the orgasm he's just given you, as you licks you clean. He's taking care of you. You card your hands into his hair, tugging gently as he moans into your pussy. 
He gives your clit a gentle kiss, and swipes up a trailing tear that rolls down your inner thigh. You watch as he pops his fingers into your mouth, cleaning off the cum. Your cum. 
Miguel gives you a lazy grin in the bare bulb of the equipment closet. He seems completely unfazed by the fact his fingers were in you not a moment ago. 
"Are you free after work?" He asks, and it takes a moment for you to process. 
"Uhhh… s-sure. Probably?" 
"Let me take you for dinner, somewhere nice."
All you can do is nod, dumbly, ripped stockings still around your ankles. 
"And then I can fuck you properly, princesa." 
_
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astrxealis · 1 year
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i watched kingdom hearts cutscenes yesterday for fun and then suddenly went Wow I Love KH So Much and yeah that's really real
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f1rodrigo · 2 months
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the mclaren boy mystery | part two
l. norris / o. piastri
summary: in which your boyfriend is a formula one driver for team mclaren and when you finally decide it's time to start hinting to the world, the internet is confused on exactly which driver is your boyfriend. pairing: social media au || lando norris / oscar piastri x reader fc: jazmyn makenna a/n: sorry this took a little longer than i expected! it was so fun to make though. i didn't want to say who she's actually with because i feel like it's fun for the readers to have to figure that out too! so please share any guesses you have lol i'm interested to see what people think the outcome will be. hope you enjoy and thank you sm for reading<3
part one | sweet relief series | valentine's day drabble
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liked by yourbrother, maxverstappen1, and 101,225 others
yourusername happy birthday to my favorite brother, i love you and am so grateful to know i have someone in my life who looks after me like you do<3 here's my fav pics of us of course they're all racing related lol, our first love
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yourbrother "my favorite brother"... As far as I know I am your only brother 😐
⤷ yourusername 🥱🥱🥱🥱 technicalities
yourbrother Thank you least favorite sister, miss those days. Have to get back out on the karting track, been too long since I've beaten you
⤷ yourusername been too long since you've been beaten, you mean?
⤷ yourbrother Yeah, yeah we'll let the track times speak for themselves
⤷ user1 ok but we have to admit the brother sister banter is kind of adorable
⤷ user2 no bc she seems so sweet 😭
user3 nah because what is max verstappen doing in this girls likes now????
⤷ user4 and the plot thickens 😯
user5 she saw everyone calling her a fake f1 fan and said take a look at this
user6 yn hater club how you guys feeling right about now
⤷ user7 🤡🤡🤡🤡
user8 honestly kind of hope she's dating one of them
⤷ user9 yall switch up so fast please 😭😭
user10 seriously..... you HAD to only post f1 related photos lmfao so totally pandering to the landoscar fans
user11 f1 school of wags next graduate
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liked by mclaren, yourusername, and 1,891,218 others
landonorris DOUBLE PODIUM!!!!!!!! couldn't have asked for a better race, congrats @/oscarpiastri and a huge thanks as always to @/mclaren 🧡
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user1 I SAY THATS MY BABY AND IM SO PROUD 😭
user2 mclaren double podium... oh i used to pray for times like these
user3 oscar piastri you are insane omfg
user4 MY POOKIES LOOK AT THEM !!!!!!!!! 🫂
user5 save me landoscar SAVE ME
yourusername jumping up and down screaming and crying losing my mind
⤷ landonorris you should probably get that checked out....
⤷ user6 THATS IT, ITS YN AND LANDO IM CALLING IT
⤷ user7 nah nah nah this is so giving gf of the bestie banter
⤷ user8 agreed hopping on the oscaryn train 💪🏻
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yourusername added to their story
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oscarpiastri added to their story
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liked by kellypiquet, oscarpiastri, and 789,012 others
yourusername qatar gp smiles <3 practice timeeee
📸 @/kellypiquet
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kellypiquet so beautiful
⤷ yourusername all you
landonorris eye spy a mclaren car down there?
⤷ yourusername ? i just see a tractor
⤷ landonorris not funny. 😐
⤷ yourusername i certainly laughed
⤷ oscarpiastri same actually
⤷ user1 i dont know how much longer i can take this
⤷ user2 GUYSSSS i am telling you its so oscaryn
⤷ user3 WHAT literally look at the Proof its so landoyn 🥱
⤷ user4 i am giggling we're literally in a shipwar
user5 she's so pretty i'm sorry guys i love her 😵‍💫
⤷ user6 well yes!
user7 patiently waiting for one of the mcl boys to main feed post her then we know for sure ‼️
⤷ user8 at this rate it still won't clear anything up
lilymhe miss u beautiful
⤷ yourusername omg i miss u more ms lily
⤷ user9 she has The wag stamp of approval WE MOVE!
user10 theres four e's at the end of 'time'....... landos number is 4 i've got it guys 😃😃
⤷ user11 seek medical attention STAT
⤷ user12 bro thinks this is a taylor swift album release
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liked by mclaren, landonorris, and 789,012 others
yourusername oscar piastri sprint race winner AND mclaren double podium, better start calling me the good luck charm
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user1 nah bc you're onto something.....
user2 she can't be serious 😐
⤷ user3 well no shit it's just an instagram caption
user4 i cannot be the only one who finds the caption extremely weird
⤷ user5 nah i'm with you i've never liked her 🙄
⤷ user6 its just so odd like forcing yourself into the mclaren narrative completely taking away from the boys achievements writing it off as your own doing...
⤷ user7 omfg yall are so dramatic just say you're jealous they're not dating you lmfao
⤷ user8 no fr because it is not that serious it's clearly a joke like she loves them cmon now
mclaren BRB getting your paddock passes for the duration of the season
⤷ yourusername i'm giggling, i love you guys 😙
⤷ user9 see mclaren is fine with it so yall should be too
⤷ user10 now i'm going to need all the haters to sit DOWN and shut the fuck UP
oscarpiastri wait can you send me that picture
⤷ yourusername i literally did already but okay
⤷ oscarpiastri ok could do with less attitude
⤷ yourusername you have not seen real attitude piastri
⤷ oscarpiastri 😧
⤷ user11 i think this just converted me to team oscar
⤷ user12 nah this is literally landoyn confirmation
landonorris 🍀
⤷ user13 i am picking up what he's putting down
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part one | sweet relief series | valentine's day drabble
taglist:
@landoscar-f1 , @urfavnoirette , @imsiriuslyreal
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club577 · 2 years
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♫ :)
from july playlist:
MAYDAY - TheFatRat, Laura Brehm
Party Poison - My Chemical Romance
Next Thing - Rostam
Easy To Hate - Waterparks
Planetary (GO!) - My Chemical Romance
WHAT IS UP W ALL THE DANGER DAYS SONGS
from liked songs:
(first gave me Next Thing again smh but im not counting that)
Paradise - Coldplay
Dicke Bertha - Kanonenfieber
Nausicaä of the Valley of Wind - Opening theme
Brand New Brain - Love Fame Tragedy
Doom Days - Bastille
hooray finally a bas song
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beyoncecock · 2 years
Text
someone give me the power to meal prep I am begging bro
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cactuscoolerr · 10 months
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PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE ELABORATE ON BIG DICK NAGI HIS PULLOUT GAME IS PROBABLY SHIT BUT IT WOULD FEEL SO GOOD <3
omg…nagi with breeding and creampies…and he’s just so big and you can’t push him off of you cause he’s just laying on top of you now and he’s too heavy…big lazy baby…
⋆。˚. nagi seishiro - needy nagi
• nsfw
• notes: also i think i accidentally went off topic.. but ummm yeah.. :-:
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but bro.. nagis pull out game is literall ass 💀
he’ll be like “yeah i’ll pull out” blah blah but once he’s balls deep inside ur cunt he’s whining and whimpering ab how good u feel and how badly he doesn’t wanna pull out 😭 hes so annoying omg like he doesn’t even have a breeding kink tbh he just likes how u feel wrapped around him but if you have a breeding kink then that makes it better cuz both of u win in the end 🙏
but like if ur not into breeding and u don’t want him cumming inside of u then u and him r completely stocked on condoms 💀
i wholeheartedly believe that nagi is a sex fiend. like this mf didn’t get it at first since he’s never had anyone to have sex with but once u and him finally had sex a few months into ur relationship, he can’t not be in ur cunt. HES SO DUMB I HATE HIM. like ur first time was awful bc he was inexperienced and so were u but he had absolutely no clue ab anything while u had a general idea. ong bro thought he could just push into u without prep or anything.. he was def like “why isn’t it going in?” “oh ur crying? what’s wrong?” LIKE STFU OMFG 😭😭😭
and then you’d be telling him that he’s fucking huge and he can’t just push inside of u like that and he’s just like “oh” LMFAO
like this is how i imagine it’d go:
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it felt like you and nagi had been making out for hours before you were gently helping him out of his clothes while he took yours off. he seemed hesitant, but you knew that he was curious about sex with how fast he was with pulling off your panties and your bra.
“you’re wet” nagi sounded breathless but he spoke in that usual bored tone, despite the way his eyes seemed to light up.
you didn’t say anything to him, gulping softly once you held his hardened cock in your hand. while making out, you felt him grow hard and you knew that he’d be big, but you didn’t think he’d be this big. a part of you felt scared for the pain, but the other part of you was excited for the way he’d stretch out your virgin cunt and fuck into you.
hesitantly, you dragged your hand up his cock and towards his cock head, making him wince softly. your eyes met his with concern, but he just stared down at you without any emotion clear on his face. “you need to do it like this,” he spoke and grasped onto your wrist, bringing it up towards his face before spitting on your palm. “it hurts if you don’t use spit”
your eyes stayed on his for a second longer before hesitantly bringing your hand back down to wrap around his cock. his words only made you afraid of hurting him, which wasn’t what he was trying to do when he told you that.
but once you began stroking his cock gently, he let out a small whine before falling forward to lean his forehead on your shoulder.
“feels good..” he whimpered softly, close to your ear with his warm breath fanning your neck. “wanna be inside of you.. bet thatd feel so much better, pretty”
you let out a shaky breath and looked down at your hand on his cock. the sight made you clench around nothing, suddenly needing to feel his huge cock inside of you. “ok..”
surprisingly, it took a lot longer to get into position than you thought necessary, but you felt that it was worth it once nagi stood above you on his knees, in between your spread legs, his eyes fixated on your wet pussy. you couldn’t even tell what he was thinking anymore with the far away look in his eyes.
“ok..” you breathed out and looked up at the ceiling, “do you know what you’re doing?”
nagi didn’t say anything, only nodding, despite how you couldn’t see him. without any warning, nagi pressed his cock head into your folds before trying his best to slide into your cunt. you let out a loud whine and involuntarily attempted to press your thighs together, only to be stopped by nagi’s huge body from above you.
with the small whines and the tears building up in your eyes, nagi looked down at you with a look of confusion. “what’s wrong?” he asked, finally some emotion in his voice. “you can’t just fuck me” you scolded, not completely aware of what you were saying, which only left nagi even more confused.
“i thought that’s what we were doing..?” he asked while bringing his hands to rest on your knees with how tired he was getting. he didn’t think sex would take this long to start. “yeah, but..” you couldn’t finish your sentence as you began crying softly. he looked down at you, still confused before sighing deeply.
a quiet groan sounded from him before spreading your legs once more and collapsing on top of your body, careful not to crush you.
“i’m sorry, pretty..” he said softly against your neck, “didn’t mean to make you cry” nagi’s soft yawn against your skin made you laughs softly before sniffling and looking down at him. “it’s ok.. you didn’t know”
“but you can’t just push into me..” you said with a small pout and he propped himself up to look at you. “why not?” his face was full of confusion once more and you had to resist the urge to laugh, finding him adorable. “you’re way too big, sei.. you’ll hurt me really bad if you do..”
nagi’s gaze softened at your tone before ducking down to kiss you, something he knew how to do well. “i’m sorry..” he whispered against your lips before hesitantly moving to sit back on his knees again. you could see the tired look in his eyes from where he looked down on you, but you didn’t say anything.
“can i try again..?” nagi said, tone still gentle as he looked at you. “i promise i can do better for you”
his words made you melt and you nodded, propping yourself up on your elbows before starting to guide him in fingering you open before taking his cock.
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