#i just really love this stinky little man ok

[bluecoolr]

I’m Miss Ambrose fr fr

currently obsessed with @ventiswampwater‘s fic, miss ambrose.

[bigguyenthusiast]

Random ghost head cannons because I’m having brain rot <3

Simon ‘simp’ Riley loves to follow you around when you’re doing chores (or anything really)

You have to bring some groceries ? Well, he has a car and two big arms to help you carry whatever you want, plus he can reach anything’s that’s too high for you <3 come on get in the car

Got a doctors appointment ? Of course he’ll be by your side, what if you need moral support ? Come on darling he’s just looking out for you :(

Need to get some supplies for a project you’re randomly interested in? Not only is he coming to check it out but he’s funding all of your little hobbies, he loves seeing his darling so interested in something

If he finds out about your little celebrity crush, he’s so stupidly jealous, just annoying you with questions like “if he and I were in the same room, who are you going to”

“What if I died? and he wanted to marry you would you say yes? Be honest”

“Be honest who’s more good looking, I won’t be mad” (lie)

He’d secretly want to ask you, if he was a worm would you still love him?

Oh and god forbid if he sees you on the couch with little Riley by your side, reading a book, a thin blanket resting on you, this man will nudge his dog off of your lap so he can take a little nap

He’ll wrap his large arms around your waist as he rests his head on your abdomen, and if you wrap your thighs around his neck, good luck paying attention to that book :P

One time he came home from deployment, sneaked into the house to surprise you, and he saw you in the kitchen, two pots on the stove, one left alone and the other has you stirring it, you had a pretty little apron around your waist, Riley was the first to be aware of his sudden arrival, running to her owner as she jumped up and down, happy to see him, you turn around with a gasp, running to your man that you haven’t seen in weeks, still in his uniform, he’d pick you you and take his mask halfway off, bringing your lips together

You’d tell him to go shower while you finish dinner and he’ll just shake his head and wrap his arms around you as you continues cooking.

He’d be spooning you, both of you on the couch, you’re on tiktok and he’s watching over your shoulder, and if you see a thirst trap of a character, and worse if you saved it? He’s crossing his arms, turning around and thrust his butt to push you off of the couch “what? Sorry I don’t think your boyfriend would appreciate you cuddling with this stranger”

You taught him to use these emojis 😒🙄 and he can’t stop using them in every sentence

Simsim 🍑: I’m close to your favourite Chinese place, what do you want 😒

Stinky farts💨: chicken curry and rice please :3

Simsim 🍑: since you asked so nicely 🙄

Stinky farts 💨: ok stop using emojis I hate it

Simsim 🍑: I thought you wanted me to be more expressive

Stinky farts 💨: I take it back, and don’t forget to get me a sprite

Simsim 🍑: ?

Stinky farts 💨: please 🙄🙄🙄

Simsim 🍑: okay 😒😒😒

[bluestarlett]

HOLY SHIT I NEVER POSTED THE NEW COSMIC DESIGNS

THIS IS AN ACTUAL CRIME WHAT.... ok cosmic fans hang onto your asses

Seraph (Heart)

This is my STINKY MAN SERAPH i love him sooo much... he's (technically) the youngest of the Starcatchers as he is only 20,000.

He's a mourning dove (and hes pigeon-toed because of this!! :D) and definitely the nicest of the Starcatchers. His VC is Sydney Sargent or just Blue Mayfield themself ^_^

Saturn (Mind)

Saturn!!! Sopping wet siren from the sea who is obsessed with the passage of time and equally terrified of it! They're the second oldest of the Starcatchers, being 23,000. They're a siren and an octopus... Obviously. (Their tentacles look like gummy sharks. I want to bite them.)

Their voice claim is WILL WOOD HIMSELF. i have so many drawings of sun as Will you bitches dont even KNOW.

Asteria (Soul)

Oh my Harmonia... it's everyone's favourite depressed lesbian!!! She's the second youngest Starcatcher, being 22,000. Shes VERY ill.

She's a human but technically she is supposed to be a goddess. It's really not working out for her though ^^"

She desperately needs therapy. Her voice claim is Marisol Yuchengco! ^^

Gaea (Whole)

I HATE THIS MOTHERFUCKER SO MUCH I NEED HIM TO DIE HES SO FUCKING TERRIBLE sorry.

Anyway, Gaea is the oldest of the Starcatchers, given he is 26,000,000,000. (the generational gap between siblings is insane. Its giving echo @morals-are-for-mortals) He's as old as the universe itself! In speculation, anyway.

He's a fucking asshole also.

He is a god (unfortunately). He does not have a voice claim! The way his voice works is more so the way you can visualize a sentence or thought in your head despite your thoughts not actually having sound. Like reading something, if that makes sense?

Anyway, those are my little losers <3

[hijackalx]

*SOME DURGE QUEST SPOILERS*

***NONCON AND DRUG USE MENTIONS***

GORTASH SFW HEADCANONS:

ok to start i think when he was a prisoner his hair got rlly long and unkept and he hateddd it so the minute he escaped he chopped that shit off himself and thats why its so unruly lol (*EDIT he always cuts his own hair is what im sayin)

this man is such a taurus like everything about him screams taurus. has a taurus stellium fosho

would listen to superheaven

hes also sooo jenny by studio killers, disco man by remi wolf, happiness by the 1975 coded with Durge 😩😩

with durge hes also giving bf that ur dad hates but like thats canon. i think he likes that hes able to influence durge to the point that they rebel lol. the type of boy u run away with when ur younger

probably BLASTED jet black heart by 5SOS on repeat when Durge disappeared LMFAOO

also i kind of feel like the fearless buff to his clothing is more an insight to his character rather than him needing magic to not be fearful bcz he literally got the shit beat out of him everyday and lived in HELL how can he not be desensitized to everything at that point 😭😭😭 it does not get much worse than that my boy

hes so thique like hes just a big boned dude. tiddies SO fat too EUGH + thick shoulders/arms. he feels so warm and safe i just know it i just KNOW it gurl

also idk if it was supposed to happen but in my latest playthrough during the fight with him he dropped his bow and just started beating the shit out of us 😭😭😭😭 all hands baby like WHAT 😭😭 so i like to think thats his preferred method of fighting idk if thats canon tho i feel like i seen somebody talking abt that before but mightve just been another hc

occasionally does drugs. likes the ones that make him feel really elated (idk what theyre called in bg3 its some kind of dust or something) ALSO HC THAT HE WAS ON SOMETHING WHEN HE WROTE RHAT FUCKED UP NOTE TO FRANC (WAS THAG HIS NAME U GUYS KNOW THE NOTE) HE WAS OBVIOJSLY TRIPPING BALLSSSSS

lots of body hair…… everywhere……. straight and black body hair. that is so sexy to me let me smell the pheromones in your armpits king LMFAO (i think theres something wrong with me)

going off of rhat yes i think he smells good (DIVINE, even) as a woman that is feral and in heat all the time. but to normal ppl he may smell kind of weird. not STINKY stinky but like when u dont shower and ur natural scent starts to mix with the perfume/cologne ur wearing SORRY 😭😭😭 im trying to be realistic here. or maybe like when u wake up and didnt shower the night before and u can still smell the perfume/cologne u put on yesterday. basically what im saying is he might need to shower

hes just so masculine it drives me crazy I LOVE MEN !!!!!!!!!! I LOVE EEENERM. ME E WN

love language:

giving = lowkey getting acts of service vibes here but u didnt hear it from me 🤫🤐 gift giving too. tav is just his widdle babie and he wants to make sure theyre the happiest they can be 🥺😩

receiving = acts of service LMAO give and get back type of shit

relationship wise i think he is the most doting and sweetest person. like tav will never have to worry abt anything ever again bcz he will handle everything. takes care of them cuz they are his king/queen 😌

GORTASH NSFW HEADCANONS:

yeah going off that last hc he is sweet outside the bedroom but a menace in it. its just the way he is. its probably exhausting too 😩 like if u ask him to be gentler/less intense he will try for a while but probably wont enjoy it as much. he doesnt like to hold back.

i WILL say tho ☝🏻🤨 i think when he gets close to finishing he gets a little more soft/loving. he just has to get his badness out first yall its fine

HIGH libido wants to smash all the time. he also (POSSIBLE NONCON MENTION !!!!!!!) thinks that since ur his u should be willing to give it up whenever he wants it. (NONCON MENTION OVER) i think in the bedroom he sees u as a servant even if ur considered his equal normally. like hes a chosen of bane he has to feel like he has control over u in SOME way

can be selfish depending on his mood. sometimes he doesnt see u as anything other than a toy (lowkey hard for me to admit but i NEVA LIE GIRLS !!!!! 🙅🙅🙅) like can be such a fucking asshole about it too

BUT !!! when he is feeling generous he is soooo generous. EUGH like he will make sure u enjoy urself!!!! probably multiple times !!!!!!!!!!!!

dont know why nobody else has said he has a daddy kink. so obvious like call him daddy ms thing he will nut so hard. oh corruption kink too. like can u imagine Durge being so innocent when they first met cuz they were never allowed to get close to anybody and hes just sooo into it HELLO i got to write that fic NEOW

omg breeding kink too give him heirs. will fuck the shitttt out of u in a mating press. probably comes a lot too almost impossible not to get pregnant with him LMAO

likes to pick u up and fuck u. manhandling king. also will do the faerun equivalent to coke and wants u to do it w him then fuck nasty afterwards

i feel like he doesnt last an extremely long time. 15-20 mins is THE MOST youre getting out of him lol he just gets very excited (which is lowkey kind of cute??)

do i even have to say that this man is packing schmeat. heavy dick. heavy balls. allow me to bear some of that weight for u my liege 🤲🏻🧎

ORIN BONUS ????:

mostly nsfw

ok i didnt originally plan to add orin but listen….. gortash is a charismatic guy….. imagine orin was into him too LISTEN ! like shes jealous asf of Durge in that sense too not just bcz of them being bhaal’s fav. like when i think abt them i just am getting a vibe okay. this trio……..

every time she sees gortash and Durge acting close and doing all their yucky lovesick shit she just gets soooo mad. now imagine she shifts into Durge to get gortash to fuck her. yeah… yall seeing the vision? would he ever find out ?? imagine that was why he hates orin so much?? he doesnt want to tell Durge (cuz thats cheating hes not a cheater duh 🙄 plus hes scared theyll be mad at him) and thats why his explanations as to why he hates orin are so vague

[broken-glass-puppet]

Ok ok what if, poly Wukong and Macaque with a monkey!reader?? Like the reader knew both Wukong and Macaque before JTTW and well after JTTW the reader kinda disappeared due well everything that happened and not wanting to confront what was going on but now the three are reunited and the reader is helping Wukong and Macaque work through their drama without realizing both Wukong and Macaque are trying to court them- (this might not make any sense and im sorry but like im tired lol-) anyways! Have a good day!

Angsty gay little stinky monkies live free rent on my brain, not complaining though

They are so happy, you are with them but that means they have to share

To be honest, they know damn well they both have fellings for each other but won't admitted anything

But you are like them so they both expect to know they they both are trying to seduce you

You don't have a clue, they are trying so hard but you are just so :D

So let's say you got it and started a relationship with both of this dudes

Time for some trauma work, OWWW YEAH BOY!!

No but seriously, you and sun worked with macaque, you two knows that he is well hurted, by a lot of things but hey hes super nice having you both

Teasing, by the two of them

And cuddles, these two, THESE FUCKERS ARE THE MOST CLINGY AND TOUCH STARVED MFS!!

he will lay in the bed, wrapping their tails around your hips, hugging and kissing you, talking really sweets things while you tried to sleep

And sun little monkie friends are so cute with you, they love you so much, that much that makes sun and macaque so jelaous

They are super clingy but they also loves to spend time with you, but my man's don't understand the term of "personal space"

Basically they are fighting for your attention like it's some kind of competition

"oooooh nooo it's MY turn hugging reader" "oh no you little shit"

Power couple

I am so sorry I posted this so late but school is killing me, some problems with friends and procrastinating, hope you like it

[michelleleewise]

Loki's di-llama- To Panty or not to Panty...

Pairing: Eventual Loki x Reader but right now he thinks she's a stinky mess and she thinks he's a hot jerk. Together they're a hot mess.

Warnings: Some innuendos and euphemisms about what Loki is packing down under and the effect it may have on some people. 🤨🤨 mild swearing, attempted poisoning, enemies to lovers, pining and Loki being Loki.....

Summary: In the land of Asgard, King Loki is selfish and vain. His arrogance causes others to plot against him. When he's turned into a llama, will humble peasant Y/N help Loki even though he plans to knock down her beloved village and build...a closet for his clothes?!

A/N: our idea (Loki's New Groove) written with lovely and talented @xorpsbane. Sorry it took me a stupid amount of time to get back to this...but here we are.....the finale!!!!!! Thank you all so much for reading/commenting and everything!! It has been our pleasure!!!! The inspiration for our little satchel angel came from none other then the lovely and talented @lokisgood!!! Check out her Satchel Steve series, it's amazing!!!

Part Five -- Finale-

Loki stood there flabbergasted, staring at Hela like she had grown another head. "I..I don't understand....I thought...." Loki trailed off, looking down "Well, you thought wrong." Hela sneered walking over to her table picking up a dagger "y..your really gonna kill me....over panties!?" Loki yelled stepping back. "Let me explain it to you in a way you may understand..." hela trailed off walking closer "You’re unnecessary. Redundant. Unwanted. No longer needed.” she sneered repeating his own words to him. "You’ve been given the pink slip, You’ve been laid off, your job is no more....It has ceased to be, It has become a thing of the past, but No hard feelings.” she smiled seeing Loki's face "Hey, that sounds like what he said to you." Thor added "yes....I know you oaf.....it's called a cruel irony." She snapped "I don't think he needs anything ironed, he's not wearing clothes." Thor said furrowing his eyebrows.

"Please stop talking and finish them off." Hela snapped tossing Thor the dagger. He looked down staring at it "hey....your not gonna back down now are ya?" A voice said as the little man with the metal arm appeared on Thor's shoulder. "Hey, where's the other guy?" Thor asked seeing him shrug when the man in the white toga appeared, laying on a massage bed with little cucumbers over his eyes "hey!" Thor yelled making him jump "oh..geeze I'm sorry!" The man said, quickly making the table disappear "ok, what did I miss." He asked adjusting his satchel "well hela over there tossed me this dagger you see." He explained as you, loki and hela stared at him. "And she told me to take them out..and then he appeared and we waited for you.." Thor trailed off

"Thor!" Hela yelled getting his attention "what made me think you could do this....this one simple thing!" She yelled walking closer "everytime I talk to you it's like in taking to an ape!" She continues "woah!" The man in the toga said gasping "a really big, stupid Ape named Thor!" She yelled as all three of them gasped "and another thing! I've never like your pop tarts..' hela sneered "never!" She crossed her arms as Thor looked down. "Oh that's it...she's gonna get it." The man with the metal arm said. "Calm down guys, you know from above, the wicked will get their just rewards." The man in the toga said as they all looked up, seeing a heavy metal chandelier "Hey....that'll work." Thor said cutting the rope as it plummeted towards hela, closing his eyes, not wanting to see.

Opening his eyes he saw the chandelier landed a fraction too far to the right "that usually works." He mumbled "yeah...so does this." She said, pulling a lever as the floor opened up, Thor plummeting down the hole. You took the opportunity to look behind you, seeing shelves lined with potions seeing the one with the little person figure you nudged Loki "psssst....." you hissed trying to get his attention, but he kept staring at the floor. "For God's sakes loki." You whispered, sneaking over to the shelves, reaching your hand up to grab the potion "now, where were we." Hela said, turning seeing you by the potions "and what do you think your doing?" She asked, making her way towards you when you snatched the vial, trying to keep distance between her.

"Loki....do something!" You yelled, ducking as a beaker flew past your head, running around the table she plowed into you, tackling you to the ground as the vial flew out of your hand, seeing her pull a knife out and hold it above you "now, I will..." She trailed off as she flew off of you, her body slamming into the shelved knocking all the potions to the floor, looking up seeing Loki standing over you, looking into your eyes "y..you saved me.." you whispered "i..well see.." he stuttered, running a hoof over his face "I need you to open the vial....thumbs." He said making you smile "uh huh.." you trialed off, jumping up going to the pile of potions "which is it!?" You yelled "what makes you think I know!?" Loki yelled back hearing an alarm sound.

"You two better hurry....I'm having guests over." Hela laughed as the doors flew open, several Einjhar stepping into the room "get them! They murdered king Loki!" Hela yelled pointing to you both when the guards pointed their staffs at you "shit, take them all!" You yelled, gathering them up in your skirt you took off, Loki following close behind you, knocking a table over as you ran."Ok...we have to figure out which one it is....try this one." You said, popping the lid off pouring it down Loki's throat when he suddenly shifted "an octopus! Are you kidding me!?" Loki yelled, his tentacles flopping around. You heard the gaurds approaching as you picked him up and ran down a long hallway. Looking down for the next vial you saw Loki's face buried between your breasts, his tentacles wrapping around your back "umm..scuse me." You said clearing your throat "oh..um i...it was cold." Loki said letting you go "yeah....here try this one." You said, pouring it in his mouth he suddenly changed into a sloth as he plopped down to the floor "uuugh!" He yelled laying there.

You looked up seeing the group of guards coming, grabbing him by the scruff of his neck you took off running "Please have wings." You said pouring the next potion down his throat as you jumped off a ledge "woo I'm flying!" He yelled, flapping his wings, looking up seeing he was a...chicken. "shit.." you muttered as you both free fell towards the ground. You closed your eyes, bracing for impact when you landed on something...soft. you opened your eyes seeing you were lieing in a pile of...panties. "aahhh.....no no no!" You yelled trying to dig your way out. "Calm yourself, it is only my Panty collection." Loki snarked fluffing his feathers "umm Gross!" You said, a shiver running through you.

"Just come on." You said, looking down seeing you had four vials left "you suck at picking, Probably because your poor, I'm picking the next one." He said hopping up onto your shoulder "give me that one." He said. You popped the top off "Yes your majesty." You snarked, pouring it down his throat, his weight suddenly shifted, turning into a.."not...one...word." He said glaring at you. Looking up seeing his head hit the ceiling "a giraffe..haha!" You laughed bending over "ha ha....very funny." He said, attempting to turn as his hooves slipped on the marble floor like ice, sending him straight into the canal. "Your...hahaha...such a cluts!" You laughed holding your sides watching him bob in the water "I'd like to see you try." He snarked "just give me another one." He snapped.

You looked down at the three you had left when you heard the guards approaching. "Shit.." you sighed, picking one you popped the lid off, leaning forward pouring it in his mouth as your foot slid, sending you into the water. You popped up, coughing up water seeing Loki "yes! I'm a llama again!" He yelled "wait.." he said looking at his hooves when a large boom radiated through the room, the water suddenly draining as you were both pulled downward, quickly grabbing a ledge as you fell through the bottom, hearing Loki's high pitched scream as you reached out grabbing his tail. "Could you please shut up!" You yelled swinging him to the side, watching him hook his hooves over the ledge pulling himself up, pulling yourself up seeing the group of guards fall from the hole, down the face of the mountain.

You kneeled down, clutching your chest trying to calm yourself when Loki came and say next to you "are you ok y/n?" He asked, looking up seeing his deep green eyes watching you. "Y..yeah, I'm fine." You said pulling out the last two vials. "Ok, it has to be one of these." You said holding them out. "I don't think so!" Hela yelled, tackling you as the vials flew from your hand. You looked up as Loki rushed to them, hela right on top of him as they landed on the vials, a large puff of green smoke surrounded them "loki!" You yelled, standing up seeing Loki stumbled out coughing, the cloud dissipating when you saw a small fluffy rabbit sitting next to the vial. "Ill take that thank you very much." Loki snarked picking it up "ok, this is the one." You said smiling, relieved it was almost over when the bunny lept up, clawing at Loki's face "shit! Run away! Run away!" You yelled, wishing you had a hand grenade as Loki swung around knocking you off the ledge.

You barely caught yourself on another small ledge, thanking whatever gods there were that Loki carved weird designs into the castle. "Y/n!" You heard Loki yell, "drink the potion." You yelled back, trying to hold on as your fingers ached. "What the.." you heard before hearing a maniacal laugh "muahaha...did you truly believe.." the high pitched voice stopped before coughing "is that my voice?" It said looking around "is that MY voice!" It squeaked making you laugh "ugh..oh well." Hela said holding the potion over the edge "no! Don't drop it!" Loki yelled "I'm not you idiot! I'm going to drink it, and once I'm back to my goooorgeous self I'm going to KILL YOU!" She yelled.

You felt your fingers begin to slip, holding on for dear life as the small vial fell towards you, clinking on the stone as it traveled along the carvings on the wall when a screaming Hela fell past you. "Shit...shit..." you breathed looking down. "I'm going to die." You said to yourself, trying again to lift yourself up, seeing Loki slide down the rock going after the vial. "Loki!" You yelled, seeing him look over at you "ah, give me one second." He said, reaching forward to grab the potion. "Lokiiii..." you cried out, closing your eyes as your fingers gave out, feeling hooves wrap around your hand, looking up seeing Loki smiling at you "you didn't think I'd let you fall did you?" He winked pulling you up when you saw the vial fall of the ledge "oh no..." you trailed off watching it.

"It's...fine." loki sighed smiling "need another llama at your farm?" He asked looking down "loki, we will figure this out, we just need..." you trailed off hearing laughter, as hela shot up through the sky holding the vial "what the.." you started "Oh! My trampoline order must be here." Loki said smiling. You looked up seeing hela slam into the over hang of the ledge making you wince, the potion flying over to the other side of the wall between two long carvings "hey, look!" You yelled, pointing at it seeing Loki nod as you turned, pressing your back to his, looping your arms together you leaned on eachother, slowly walking up the wall.

"Ok, lift me up." You said as he pushed you up, extending his neck you reached out, your fingers brushing the vial when hela snatched it "muahaha.....I win." She said as a small door flew open, smacking hela in the face as she dropped the vial "got it!" You yelled reaching out. You pulled yourself up, grabbing Loki's arm pulling him with you as you sat face to face panting, "holy...shit." you sighed seeing him laugh "here, let me." You said, pulling the lid off you held it up "see you on the other side." He smiled, drinking the potion, transforming back onto the King.

"But really, I am very sorry I had you thrown out a window." Loki said, patting Anthony's back "oh, its OK your highness, all is forgiven." Anthony smiled "I better get back to work, have a pleasant day." He said bowing to Loki before taking off down the hall "he really is a nice guy." Loki said to himself, adjusting his tunic as he walked into the throne room, seeing you sitting at the far end by the model of your town, holding the small version of your home. You looked beautiful with your hair brushed to the side sweeping over your shoulder, the sun beaming in the window hitting your face making you look like an angel. He cleared his throat, smoothing his hair down as he strode over to you "so, you lied to me." He said glaring at you.

I beg your pardon?" You asked, looking up into his eyes, a heat traveling through you as his gaze pierced into you. "I believe you told me that this part of your village had the best view, and I was drug all around that grimy little village and I saw no spectacular view." He said crossing his arms "wait, i.." you trailed off "so, I will be building my closet elsewhere...thank you very much." He said, pulling the model building off the village, reaching down grabbing your little home, his fingers brushing yours as your eyes met "so...I'm afraid you'll be stuck in the view less village forever y/n." He smiled, taking you model home setting it back in place. You looked up at him adjusting your model home "I guess I can't fool you huh?" You smiled "oh no I'm onto you, you can't pull the wool over my eyes y/n." He said sitting down next to you sighing.

"So, what now?" You asked looking at him "Well, I've abolished the Panty law, and will be working to fix our economic issues, how about you?" He asked looking at you "Well, I guess I'll be heading home." You said looking down, seeing him nod out of the cornerber of you eye. "Oh, before I go...I got you something, but don't tell anyone." You whispered, reaching into your pocket you pulled out a pair of panties, tossing them at him making him laugh. "T..thank you my dear." He smiled tucking them into his tunic. "Well, I'll see you around." You said standing as he did "have a safe journey home y/n." He said, grabbing your hand kissing the back of it. You nodded, quickly leaving as a tear slid down your cheek. You made your way to the market, wiping your eyes "stupid y/n, he's a king and your...nothing" you said to yourself, looking back at the palace as you turned and began your journey home.

A week later you woke to the sound of hammering making you groan. You got up looking out the window seeing an entire crew of people building a new home on the hill next to yours "new neighbors...yay." you said rubbing your eyes. You got dressed heading down stairs seeing nat "morning sunshine!" She said flipping eggs in a pan "yeah...fantastic." you said flopping down. "You miss him don't you?" She asked setting the pan down. "No idea what your talking about." You said standing back up "Why don't you go back, tell him how you feel?" She asked "because! I'm a peasant nat, he said so himself. And he was interviewing brides when we met, he's probably married already." You sighed grabbing your poncho "I'm gonna go tend the animals." You said quickly leaving before she said something else.

A few days later you saw men carrying large furniture into the house, appearing to get the home set up. "Well, I better welcome whoever it is." You said walking into the kitchen you grabbed a basket, adding a loaf of bread, some fruit and cheese and some of the brownies you made yesterday. It would be awhile before you could afford to make more but it was worth it for a good first impression. You grabbed your poncho and set off, walking up the path hearing someone giving directions as you knocked on the door, holding the basket out as it opened "yes...over there is perfect. Oh..hello y/n." He said making you freeze "l..loki?" You stuttered seeing him smile "the one and only." He said winking "what are you doing here?" You asked staring at him "oh, well I found THIS hill had the best view, so I built a summer home. Is that for me?" He asked pointing to the basket "oh..yes." you said holding it out.

"Listen y/n, I wanted to..." he started, hearing a voice from inside "who is it my king?" A lady said, stepping Into the doorway looking at you "oh, I'm sorry...I didn't mean to interrupt." You said quickly turning and leaving "y/n..wait!" You heard him yell behind you but you refused to turn around and let him see you upset "y/n.." he said, gently grabbing your arm turning you around "the reason I came here, was because I needed to tell you something." He said tilting your head up to look at him. "I..I need you y/n, i...I love you." He said making you freeze "but...what about.." you started looking at the woman "oh her, she's my personal guard. Since Hela I have someone with me always." He explained. "But, I'm a peasant...and I'm smelly and poor and your the king and..." you were cut off as Loki pressed his lips to yours, slowly moving his lips with yours, pulling back to look at you.

"Y/n...you saved my life, my kingdom and most importantly....you saved me from myself. I love you and only you, smelly peasant breasts and all." He smiled cupping your cheek. "I..I love you too Loki." You sighed, a tear streaming down your cheek as you reached up kissing him again, his arms wrapping around you holding you tight to him. You pulled back smiling "I would be honored if you would allow me to court you." He said pushing your hair back. "Yes...I'd like that very much." You smiled back. "Thor just opened a new restaurant near here, would you care to join me for two heartburns in arsenic sauce?" He asked making you laugh "I would love to." You said grabbing his hand you walked into the sunset, the future ahead of you...

@vbecker10 @lokisgoodgirl @sinsandguilt @high-functioning-lokipath @mochie85 @slytherclaw1227 @jaidenhawke @budugu @schizonephilim @lokidokieokie @holdmytesseract @your-taste-on-my-lips @lokixryss @asgardianprincess1050 @tallseaweed @aniar4wniak @sekaishell @lokispetblogs @loopsisloops @trojanaurora @lonadane @yelkmelk @stupidthoughtsinwriting @silverfire475 @bbmommy0902 @goblingirlsarah @commanding-officer @unabashed-lover-of-fictional-men @mcufan72 @glitterylokislut @tjellisworld @kkdvkyya @cueloki @daggers-and-mischief @sititran @witchyblue @verycollectivecreator @nixymarvelkins @chantsdemarins @shinraski @usagishira @nightshadelm @filthyhiddles @dukes2581 @assemblingavenger @yuu-chan-is-still-a-student12 @peaches1958 @irishhappiness @luvlady-writes

[aleksa-sims]

RL Simselfstory (18+)

CW: unplanned pregnancy, pregnancy stuff, addiction, drugs ⚠️

It was Friday. Finally! That was my last day of work in that fucking asylum I worked. 🥳 Goodbye Mr. B., on never reunion! 😡

I had a date with N. I haven’t seen him all week. Which kind of unsettled me. After all there was still his.... fiancée or ex-fiancée. Second, I’ve probably been pregnant, since our last night together in his Mom's house.... Anyway, first I went to Sandra, to visit her and little Liam, who, btw.... shit on me. 🤨 Yep,  little stinky pooped and the poop escaped! 💩 My dress was the target. So, Sandra lent me something to wear.

Sandra was the only one I told about Nico and that I might be pregnant. S. was so happy for me. She said, I have to keep this baby! Who knows, if I will ever get pregnant again, after I had those issues in summer last year? It's like a little miracle she meant. Also this was the second time I was pregnant by N. So this time, I just have to keep it, she said. But what about Daniel? I was so sad again. When I stopped by my apartment at the beginning of the week, to check if everything is still ok there, I had that sad dream about Daniel. I was totally depressed because of that. But apart from Daniel and Nico’s ex- fiancée, there was a really serious problem, that will await me and my baby, if I am actually pregnant. 😥🤦‍♀️ My fucking pills! I relapsed a few weeks ago and had to start that drug replacement therapy again. This damn thing ruined everything. That’s why, I’m going to make an appointment for an abortion. But Sandra and my Grams will save my Baby. 😞 They’re gonna change my mind at the last second! 🩷🧡 But as for my addiction & pregnancy, I think I’ll have to make a own post about it. I mentioned once, at the beginning, that I had a high-risk pregnancy. And well, this was the reason.

Anyway, Sandra tried to calm me down..

Sandra: Don’t you worry, sweetie! After the weekend we will get you a pregnancy test and if it's actually positive, I'll help you. 💛

Me: Ok. But what about Nico? He doesn't even like Babyies. Besides, he’s gonna hate me for taking those damn pills.

Sandra: Yeah, that’s pretty serious A.... But your doc said your pills won’t hurt your baby in case of pregnancy. So don't worry, it's gonna be fine. 😟

Me: Yea, but he also said, that my baby might get withdrawal symptoms the first days after birth. Daniel and I talked about all this earlier. But Nico? He's gonna hate me! And he's right! I'm gonna die if my Baby gets withdrawal. But my parents are gonna kill me anyway. 😩🤦‍♀️

Sandra: I'm sure N. ’ll love your Baby.... Once he’s here to pick you up, I’ll give him Liam. You’ll see, he’ll like it and he’ll change his mind about Babies.

Nico came...

Sandra: Hi, Nico! Nice to see you. Glad you're back. (😬)

Nico: Hi, S.! Yea, good to see you too. Kind of crazy. I barely left for a year and everyone has babies. Philip told me a bit last summer... Are you ok?

Sandra: Yea all fine. He's my little sunshine. He has changed my whole life. I'm so grateful for my Baby.

Nico: Glad to hear that. You look good S.... Oh, and I got a little something for.... Liam, right? Here, just a gift card, nothing special. I'm not that good with all that baby stuff.

Sandra: Whaat??.... Thanks, N. This is so cute, but you didn't have to! 🤩

Nico: Not a big deal.

Sandra: Now I see it too, you’ve changed, N.... I like that. 😊

Me: Aww, you're so sweet. I missed you.

Nico: I missed you too, you’re so pretty, babe.

Nico (to S.'s bf): Yo, man!... What happend to your black suits? Is that... hipster, nerdy look, your new style now? 🤨

S.'s bf: What happened to your tracksuits? Ha? 😮‍💨

Nico: You’ve never seen me in a tracksuit, so what’s your point?

S.'s bf: Hm, that’s how I remembered you. Maybe bcs of your... soccer thing, you know? 🤨

Nico: Yea, anyway 😒 ...... Let’s go, babe. Today I’ll take you to my place.

Me: And you're sure we'll be alone there?

Nico: Don't you trust me? I told you, I broke up with her. It's over.

Me: But why didn't you want to see me? I was so sad this week.

Nico: I wanted to see you! I just didn’t have time, I was busy with soccer. Was pretty tough that week. But you knew that. I called you. Every day.

Me: Yea. Idk? I thought maybe she was with you? And I was so sad about Daniel too. But when you’re with me, that pain is gone.

Nico: Why didn’t you just tell me?... I was at practice and I couldn’t come to you bcs of your parents .🤷‍♂️ But let's talk later about that.

I think Liam thought Nico was Daniel. 🙁 He started crawling all the way to Nico. Just to look and smile at him. He was literally cracking up about Nico. This was so funny. I’ve never seen and heard Liam laugh so loudly and much. So cute! Sandra asked Nico to take Liam in his arms. She wanted to see, if he was really afraid of Babies. Nico hesitated. But I could understand him! Liam just pooped, that little stinky. Again! 💩💩���‍♀️

Nico (to S.): Can you please take Liam. I think he’s pooping.

Sandra: OH! Ok sorry. Yea, just give him to me.

Nico: Heh! I knew it, I knew it! 😄

Sandra: Oh no, Liam! That new baby food, is probably not really good for you, huh?

Nico: This little dude seems like a little shit. 😉😄

Sandra: Just wait till you get your own little shit.

Nico: Nah! No thanks! As long as I can avoid it, I will.

Sandra: Are you sure you’re doing everything to avoid it?

Nico: I hope so? 🫤

Sandra: But seriously Nico. What if A. wants a Baby? Will you say no to her?

Nico: Am... If she really wants a Baby, I won’t say no to her, of course.

Sandra: But what about you? Will you take care of your Baby?

Me: 🤦‍♀️🤦‍♀️

Nico: I'll have to, I guess... Babe? You ok?... What's up?

Me: Nothing! Let's just go.

Nico took me to his place, where he and his ex-gf lived together. I was so nervous. I was afraid of what to expect. He warned me and said that some of her things are still lying around there. He tried to put everything away today, so that I feel comfortable there, but some of her stuff, she still has to pick up. I could see he was nervous too. Rather worried that it could hurt me, to see, how the two have lived together.

He also told me, when she moved in with him, she has the entire living room newly furnished, without Nico knew about it. She just ordered everything in Nico’s name, so he got the bill at the end. A friend of hers studied interior design or something and that girl, wanted to redecorate his whole apartment. But Nico came home from abroad in time and was able to stop this shit. He was totally pissed! He didn’t want to pay that bill and told her that she has to do it, or he's gonna dump her. Well, her parents had to pay for the new living room.... This is so crazy!! I'd never do something like this! Even now not after all those years with him.

Anyway, next time I will tell more about her and I will meet her there myself. 🤦‍♀️ Actually, she was ok. And tbh, I felt bad about her. She told me what happened to her a few years ago. Something really bad! That’s also why Nico couldn’t just break up with her, like he thought. She threatened to hurt herself, if he did. I thought that was totally stupid of her!! And I was mad at Nico, bcs he allowed her to succeed with that pity shit. But you'll see soon what I mean.

Previous/ Next

[atwingeofcringe]

i was thinking about this today.

what do you think jason’s cabin looks like? because i know we’ve seen it in different movies (part 2, 2009 reboot) but do you have any ideas on what you imagine his cabin looks like?

in my head it looks really run down but still taken care of. i feel like he’d have a large pieces of wood covering any windows or openings so that people can’t look in. it’s small but has enough room for a bedroom, kitchen and bathroom/shower room. or maybe instead of having a shower inside his cabin because it’s unlikely he has running water maybe he has to use one of the old camp cabins to take showers. i don’t know, this was in my head today and i wanted to talk about it to someone.

ive thought about this before! but i think my take on it might be kinda boring honestly. i really did like that in part 2 they showed that he made his own little home complete with a separate room for his mom. it was something i was looking forward to maybe seeing in the 2009 reboot but unfortunately they didnt. so i just believe that he simply stays at his old home because thats where his shrine for his mom is. but whether he sleeps in his old bed as well, im unsure of since he removed the mattress for whitney to sit on.

if he does have his own cabin i think it would be small, just enough room for only him. maybe he's got his own mattress he lays on and some lamps, a spot for a fire to keep warm. as for windows, i dont think he'd have any so if anyone managed to find it they cant peek in. windows also might just not be something he thinks about when making himself a shelter if he's trying to protect himself from the outside.

as for a bathroom, i just dont think he showers at all lmao! i think the rain is the only time he comes close to bathing and he probably just uses the bathroom anywhere in the forest. it's ok though because we love the big stinky man <3 but if any of the camp cabins somehow still have running water then he might use them! he obviously doesnt have clean clothes though. the only time he probably does is if he steals them.

when it comes to thinking of him cooking food, i always imagined him just doing it over a fire. but maybe he could have taken a camping stove or something? and if he has things to cook on and eat off of he most likely took those from his victims too.

SALDKFEW im sorry if this is super boring! i have thought this before because when i think if jason im 100% thinking about jason from the 2009 reboot!

[bluedillylee]

Hexer episode 5: A Shard of Ice

expanded scene from the very first episode of Geralt fighting the stink monster in the sewer. Have I mentioned that the fight scenes are very funny? I love them

he looks so wet and pathetic 😂 classic stinky boy

Geralt is the OG tummy ache survivor

and we have the title drop

Geralt really does just go through life getting told he smells like shit.

If this episode goes like it does in the short stories I really feel that bringing up that Yennefer willingly kissed and slept with him even tho he stinks proves her love is true

uh oh some idiots want to pick a fight with him

ayyy we got bathhouses! And Geralt looking hilarious sitting in his bath with linen over his head. Guess the jabs about smelling bad got to him

oh my god this is the third time now that Geralt has just happened to be in the same place secret conversations are happening. Every time it has something to do with Gwidon/Falwick. If anyone’s fates are intertwined it’s these two

“I’d like to see you take my sword one day” my dudes that’s some of the gayest shit I’ve ever heard. This ex witcher got Geralt heated

I love watching Geralt negotiate. He is so tired and just exasperated with this mayor guy I’m loving it

“give me the sword or you’ll feel it” ok Geralt 😏

Geralt/Durbot hate sex when?

What do tv shows have against Yennefer dressing in black and white? I don’t dislike her red dress but it puzzles me

Jaskier!? I don’t remember him showing up in the short story interesting change from the books.

god I love Yennefer 💜 what is she scheming 😍

Aaaaahhhh yennskier are going for the throat. What an argument both thinking the other one is hurting Geralt and not treating him right it’s amazing 🥲 this is delicious especially if I mix in jealousy and resentment of what the other has with Geralt 🤩

look I know yen just kicked Jaskier out onto the streets where riots are about to break out but she just crumbled up and cried so jail for Jaskier for a thousand years ok

Geralts out looking for his man the throuple is in shambles

the snail conversation 🐌😢💔and then he hugs Jaskier awwww

“I haven’t met a better man than you” oh my god

Istredd hmmmm def not as pretty as Netflix Istredd but he could grow on me. The corpse in the middle of the room however… ew

so Istredd wants to help Yennefer cure her infertility?

yen and Geralts convo is breaking my heart 💔💔💔 my blorbos!

it’s an interesting change from the books to have Geralt decide to break up but I’m not sure I like it over the book version. In this one there’s this sense of ‘silly woman and her silly feelings not like us men’ while the book version shows how stupid Istredd and Geralt are acting for thinking they could fight it out and make the choice for Yennefer.

this Geralt has a sense of humor messing with that guy who was following him

aw they have a date for the hate sex lol Geralt/Durbot 4ever!

well they got to embrace? Hahaha Geralt/Durbot I’ll never 4get u

well Geralt I think Istredd is a little in love with you now so a silver lining maybe?

where I’m watching this episode

[mod2amaryllis]

Lots of people are coming out with their best shows/movies/anime etc. of the year, and since you have such impeccable taste I'd love to hear yours! Only if it's okay ofc! Have a wonderful rest of 2022 and great 2023!

ok this is the only end of year reflection i have the capacity to do tonight, lemme thiiink ummm it was a big year for things tbh!!! I'll just ramble i guess, first up...

TV SHOWS

SEVERANCE: possibly the best first season of a show I've ever seen, and absolutely the best s1 finale of a show I've ever seen, huge ups to @tricktster for recommending it. you've probably heard it a million times but if you haven't, GO WATCH SEVERANCE, it lives up to the hype.

THE REHEARSAL: the magic trick that this show pulls is so bizarre and unprecedented it's like. impossible for me to even talk about. the entire time watching it i was gaping at my tv in open disbelief. it does and says so much in the wildest ways possible I'm still obsessed.

WHAT WE DO IN THE SHADOWS S4: three words, Baby Colin Robinson

ANDOR: I'm not a star wars guy at allll. not even a little bit. my expectations have never been high. but when i saw @variastrix loving it up on my dash i was like okaaay and holy shit. SO good. the prison arc especially was just like OUUUGHH THEMES AND DIALOGUE OFF THE CHARTS!!!

ANIME

SPY X FAMILY: what's especially fun is that we were in Japan while the second part of the season was dropping and Anya was fucking eeeeverywhere!!! everyone agrees with me cannot get ENOUGH of that funny little girl!!! best execution of fake dating trope everr the more convoluted the better.

MOB PSYCHO 100 III: ......like. c'mon what is there to even say. what's there to saaaaay! it's in my top 3 anime ever! the subversion of shonen anime has basically ruined all other stereotypical anime for me forever because it's just. so much better. so much funnier and more poignant to watch the most powerful boy ever strive to be a better person. i love that little guy and his silly conman role model

MOVIES

EVERYTHING EVERYWHERE ALL AT ONCE: i feel the same way about this movie as anyone else. saw the trailer, hooked instantly, then when i actually watched it i walked out going "this is the greatest movie I've ever seen??????" insanely shot, cast incredible, the whole premise simultaneously huge as a multiverse and small as an immigrant couple in a laundromat. this movie defined my cosmic outlook on life. that nothing matters, so we should make the most out of what and who we love. in any other year this would've been my far and away fave. but then came:

NOPE: you guys follow me. you've heard it already. this movie ..... this..... FUCKING MOVIE.... haunted me from the moment i saw that chimp covered in blood. it scared me so bad i wasn't even sure if i liked it but then i thought and kept thinking AND I THOUGHT AND KEPT THINKING AND I HAVEN'T STOPPED THINKING this movie this god damn movie. it's a social commentary, it's a blockbuster popcorn hit, it's about animals, it's about people, it's a creature feature, it's funny, it's glorious to look at it's glorious and i love it so so much. Jean jacket really is a beautiful name for a baby girl.

GAMES:

VAMPIRE SURVIVORS: this game is like if you broke gaming down to it's purest chemical form and injected it directly into your bloodstream. it's a game that might be perfect in its simplicity. it's also really funny that i can be a stinky old garlic man, i like that a lot. it's free on mobile what are you waiting for.

HORIZON FORBIDDEN WEST: i feel so fucking bad for this series not once, but TWICE releasing at the same time as two of the greatest games literally ever made (i still have to beat elden ring oops) because i love these games SO MUCH! they scratch a very particular itch for me which is plenty of upgradable weapons/armor for me to chase, incredibly in depth lore, and post apocalyptic robot dinosaurs. literally no notes. i love games like this that're like "we know what you want. you want to kill a spinosaurus with a bow and arrow and afterwards treat yourself to some incredible American vistas, here, take it, enjoy." it's an incredibly Me game. probably my goty if measured by how much fun i had playing it.

ALBUMS:

BRONCO BY ORVILLE PECK: the biggie. life changer. this beat out pony for me. makes me wanna be a lonesome cowboy in the Rockies so fucking bad i can taste it. like....im already thiiiis close to being a lonesome cowboy in the Rockies and when i listen to curse of the blackened eye on my morning walk, looking at the snow capped mountains, I'm there. I'm a cowboy baby. also saw him live and sobbed he's insane, the talent, he's just showing off he's nuts.

LAST NIGHT IN THE BITTERSWEET BY PAOLO NUTINI: through the echoes specifically. came up randomly in a mixed playlist and swiveled my head so fucking fast. one of my favorite artist finds of the year.

NOPE OST BY MICHAEL ABELS: that's right bitch nope gets featured TWICE, idc!!!

DANCE FEVER BY FLORENCE + THE MACHINE: this is the album to finally get me into Florence + the machine, before i was just into the hits but this album.... King? FREE???? DAFFODIL???????? good god welch

THINGS IN GENERAL

mfucking!!!!!!!!!

FISH!!!!!!!!!! 🐟🐟🐟🐟🐟🐟🐟💙💙💙💙✌️✌️✌️🥰🥰🥰🥰🐠🐠🐠🐟🐠🐟🐠🐟🐠🐟🐠🐡🐡🐡🐡🐡🦈🦈🤯🤯🤯🤯🤯🥹🥹🥹🥹🥹🥹

[theysaywhatasadsight]

Requested by @nobunagas-chatelaine <3

-so how u guys become friends is kind of a funny story, it's a rainy day and you, having recently joined as Aditya's new assistant, really want some chai pakode

-you're complaining to a friend on the call how much you miss your hometown and the food you got there. He overhears this and you hear him ordering the car around and asks you to get in. Initially you think it's a meeting he needs u to take notes in but he really is an awk lil boy who wanted you to have what you wanted so he asks the driver to take him to the best tea stall in the area

-the tea's not as good as the company as you sit and talk with the driver and the chaiwalla while the rain pours heavily around the little stall. He lets the conversation wash over him and for the first time the ever present storm in his mind is quiet and he discovers maybe he is a chai person

-the next time is when you are the only two left in the office prepping for a pitch and as he looks up from his laptop you're there, stinky from stress sweat and hair frizzy from stress, and he thinks he's seen god

-you want to leave his company because you're kinda sorta tired of being an assistant, and your good marketing skills are what a friend with a startup wants. You think your newfound friendship with him would fizzle out, but when he sees you have a passion for the startup he helps contribute ideas and puts you in contact w his mom to be an investor (also he's thrilled that you're no longer working together so he doesn't feel like ur forced to b in his presence you CHOOSE to be that means so much to a boy who's used to everything being there for him only because of his privilege)

-you keep going on chai dates on which initially he's a bit grumpy but later as he sees how fun and talkative you are he lightens up a bit too

-One night his car breaks down and you wander the city all night going from auto to auto, and you're like. Help. I love men when he takes off his coat and rolls up his forearm to help a auto driver get his vehicle going

-he used to have a thing for bikes in college but stopped riding because his dad didn't like it. You mention how in college you took your brothers bike and would go out with friends in the rain and the same night he's purchasing one

-and ur sitting behind him like. Oh. Oh no. I love boys and sitting behind them and talking like he's literally shuts his mouth and listens to your bakwaas and how the market is terrible and how capitalism is evil and ur gonna live in the jungle and he is just hm :) yes will u build a cabin or live saadhu style he's cute ok

-u slowly bring out his smiling old self again and u even accompany him to his ex's wedding, where he looks at her and realises he's lost feelings for her because he's found someone he actually clicks with. U joke that ur only there for paneer tikka and he's like. I will buy u paneer tikka forever

-and you can't help it you just fall for this sweet man who's so angry at the world and himself and you feel happy when you help him calm down and realise hey life isn't so bad. And he's so cute to look at and sometimes hold hands with (while crossing roads)

-So you do what you did last in college and buy a notebook and write about your days with him. And how much he smiles when you say a bad joke or how he likes his tea or how he frowns at you when you smoke occasionally and how he likes his alcohol, you write how he takes care of you and if he let you, you'd love him back too

-so one night you go clubbing with him (he hates the crowd but he loves to dance with you) and when no one recognises him and youre leading him through the crowd and shaking your hair he's like. Ok we can deal with this much

-when he sees you get a bit drunk he immediately abandons the one drink he was nursing and gets you both a cab, and he's gently leading you to your bed (this is the first time he's at your apartment and heyyy this is so you and cute and he has a few decor opinions that hes gonna tell you but why should he he's not gonna live here.... And now he's imagining living here)

-he deposits you on ur bed while he goes to the kitchen to get you water, and sees your diary on the dining table. And he swears he didn't mean to pry but diary flips open when he switches on the fan and he can see his name

And so much more. Words to admiration and love and all the little details about him that leave him speechless. That someone wanted him so intensely and beautifully, despite his flaws, made him nearly collapse

-and now he can't look you in the eye. Except he's going to because you're his best friend even if now he knows you both love each other too much

-so when he needs a date for a gala in the US, he convinces you to go and takes care of your outfit and hey oh no ppl think we are a couple and we only have one room

-and when ur slow dancing at the end he smiles a bit widely and makes a snide joke about your writing and you're aghast until he looks at you and winks you nearly die from the emotional overload

-you still go to have chai pakode but this time to invite the guy to ur wedding and he's like. well I'm gonna charge more to have a stall there heheheheh

[neoruby-loves-ut-aus]

First day of the sneaky Princess at Humans and Monsters Academy

James: Little sis and bro, are you ready?

Clara and David: Yes sir!! *talks to each other in minds since they can read minds like their siblings, cousins and their mother Sun and aunt Moon* I wonder who will be our first friend and which teacher we can prank on the fourth day

Sun: I read your minds kids, you might get caught and I don't want your father to be angry again.

Clara: But Mom, you're way more angry than him, nevermind, love you Mom and Dad, we're off to school 😁😁

Dream: Bye kids!!

*At the Academy*

Clara: Hi, I'm Clara! I'm new here!!

Random student: Wait.... isn't she the third daughter of the Guardian of Positivity?!

Another student: You bet and I guess that's her younger brother Prince David.

James: *in mind* Oh boy, here we go 🙁

Almost every boy to Clara: Princess Clara, please date me!!!

Clara: *speechless and confused*

David: Uhh, bro, where's Elys and others?

*then a blonde haired boy with blue eyes comes*

The boy: Hey! Give them some space!!

*the students didn't listen*

*the boy grabs Clara and David and runs to an empty classroom where no one can find them*

The boy: phew, at least they're gone. The name's Ryan Stevenson. It must be annoying to be surrounded by them.*in mind* This girl seems nice and wait...am I falling in love at first sight?!

Clara: Yeah....*in mind* he's kinda hot and kind tho.

David: *reads both of their minds* *in mind* I wouldn't mind her but we're lucky that James isn't here.

Ryan: You're my new classmate I guess because the teacher said so, we're gonna be late.

David: Ok, I'll just ask a random teacher.

*after a few moments when the class was started with the teacher introducing Clara*

Teacher: Students, this is Princess Clara, the third daughter of the Guardian of Positivity, Dream.

Random spoiled student: pfft, as if she thinks she is a princess than what I am.

Teacher: Gloria!! Enough of your self-boasting!! Apologies, your majesty.

Clara: It's okay ma'am, I'll get used to this life and I hope I can get new friends.

Ryan: *in mind* wow, this Princess is really humble as she doesn't mind sitting with common people like us.

*class lessons starts*

*after class when it's break*

Clara: Man it's so boring!!! I hardly slept when the lecture began!!

A kind girl: Yes, well my name's Eva Woods.

Clara: Nice to meet you, Eva.

*Gloria and her gang of spolied kids appear*

Gloria: Well well well, look who's here. The fake 'Princess' along with the weakling.

Clara: HEY!! WATCH YOUR TONE BRAT!! YOU CAN'T INSULT MY NEW FRIEND LIKE THAT!!

Gloria: Oh really? What you're gonna do? Well let's make a deal, meet me at the park after school.

Clara: Deal.

*the gang walks away*

Sofia: Yo!! You must be the new student!! I'm Sofia!

Clara: Hi Sofia! I'm Clara! Btw, who wants to join me now 'cause I brought an entire box of pizza!!

Eva, Ryan and Sofia: HELL YEAH!! LET'S DIVE IN!!

Gloria: *seeing her at a distance* I JUST WANT THAT PIZZA!! HOW CAN SHE BE MORE RICHER THAN ME?!

*after school*

Clara: So, I made friends with two girls named Sofia and Eva and a boy named Ryan.

Hermione: Wow, you made a lot of friends on the first day! Wondering how many friends you would get tomorr-

Gloria: HEY CLARA THE STINKY APE! I BET YOU'RE SCARED TO FIGHT HAHA LOL!

*her gang laughs and teases Clara*

James: *whispers* I think it's time to show them who's boss since we're far away from school.

Clara: Fine brat, you asked for it. *uses yellow magic on Gloria*

Gloria: HEY! WHAT ARE YOU DOING YO MY SOU-

*Clara levitates her and smacks her down to the ground hard in such a way blood did not fall but she can only feel tremendous pain*

One of the spoiled girls: What have done you freak?!

Clara: *summons her yellow fire like powers and threatens to use it on her* this is my final warning, get out.

*the gang flees in fear*

*at home they narrated everything and Sun and Dream were proud of their daughter*

*evening*

Clara: *alone in her room* *sighs*

*mutters* that boy was cute 🥺

James: *in mind* if my sister Clara has a crush on someone, that boy better be nice to her or I'll yeet him.

*meanwhile*

James: And that's how Clara's day went.

Star: uhhhhhh......

Alexander: That's kinda good not gonna lie. Oh someone's trying to flirt with Hermione and she seems uncomfortable.

James: WHO'S WHAT?! *overprotective brother mode on* *teleports away*

Twyla: Well it's kinda nice that she made friends with my original.

Elys: Yeah, welp see you all tomorrow at school.

Alexander: Same, bye!!

Humans and Monsters Academy belongs to @humansandmonstersacademy and @sofiathehooman

Dreamtale frans kids belongs to me

Star Sofia, Twyla Sofia and Dreamlevel belongs to me and @sofiathehooman

Elys belongs to @shayromi

Underlevel belongs to @sofiathehooman

Sun Frisk belongs to me

Dream Sans belongs to @jokublog

[nagaficat]

Headcanons: Babies and Stuff

CW: pregnancy, birth, pregnancy and birth complications, Deirdre/Arvis, too much Erica rambling

Seliph the pregnancy

Deirdre fucking loves being pregnant with Seliph. She's one of those people who just adores being pregnant and also does the whole glowing thing. She's here for it. It's a dream come true. She's been warned her whole life that this is something she can never have so like of course she wants it even more. She's grown up with no other children and knowing nothing of her biological family so she dreams of having one of her own some day. Someone to love her and break her curse and have children together with whom she can love unconditionally.

She is nervous at the beginning because her own mom died in childbirth. There's magic and shit but I can't imagine a medieval fantasy world having low birth mortality rates. Do they know about hand washing here? Skhddj. Anyway yeah that makes her quite nervous. She also worries a bit about her ability to be a good parent. She has no example to refer to good or bad. Ethlyn helps her through that a lot. Eth is like a big sis to her and Dee looks to her for advice often throughout the whole pregnancy since she’s already had Altena. Eventually the fears die down enough that she is able to fully enjoy the experience until much closer to the actual birth.

Deirdre sings and talks to Seliph while he's in utero. She's very much like this is a little person in there and I can't wait to meet him so I guess let's just start now! She starts just keeping at least one hand on her big tummy at all times just to feel closer to him.

Seliph the after birth

Ok so like it really annoys me that this woman would just dump her not even a year old son on a teenboy.  Like girl hello?  What’s he supposed to eat?  

Anyway I have an explanation.  Not at all an excuse but like you know.   I'm thinking about Deirdre having some ppd after giving birth to Seliph. And like being away from Sigurd and worrying about him fighting and the curse and whatever just kind of gets in her head. She can kind of fight back against it and vibe with Shannan by telling herself it is dangerous and blah blah blah but once that reason is taken away with Sigurd winning she can't hold back anymore and has to go be with her man.  It’s sad!

Twins Time

I think when she's pregnant with the twins things are different. With no memories, I think she'd have quite a bit of deja vu types of feelings. Like strange sensations that she's done this before but that's impossible. Maybe bouts of sadness and feelings of loss that she can't explain. But overall she is overjoyed and does still love the experience. I guess instead of fears about things going wrong it's replaced with weird feelings that's she's done this.

Ok so like you know in the real life the birth giver has to get like extra shots or whatever if the RH factor doesn’t match the baby’s?  That’s inspired me to think about stinky interactions between the Naga and the Loptous blood.  Dee has the minor Lopt blood herself so maybe it’s not super life threatening but I definitely think carrying Julius fucks her up pretty badly.  Exaggerated pregnancy symptoms like fatigue, light headedness, shit like that.  She ends up bedridden toward the end of it.  It’s brutal and it sucks.

Then when it’s time for her to give birth it really sucks.  It’s a long and hard labor.  Like a day long deal of awful.  There’s a close call where they almost lose her.  The Julia just slips out like it’s fucking nothing.  She’s warned not to get pregnant again.  It’s too dangerous.  This is devastating to her as she desperately would like to have more.

She does love being pregnant still though and she totally still glows. She's lovely like a goddess look at her. The idea of a family growing up in a peaceful time in their own home makes her so soft. Obviously she loves Sigurd and Seliph so fucking much but like the situation they were in as a family was not ideal. The twins will get to grow up in this ideal world and know both of their parents and have each other too! She's all about this perfect family picture that she never had and Arvis didn't have either. She wants her babies to have everything she never did. She never wants them to feel alone or unloved.

Deirdre as Mom for All the Babies

Dee insists on be very involved with raising her children. She doesn't want a nurse maid unless it's like a super emergency. She feeds them herself. And she absolutely coddles them. The second they start to cry she swoops in for the snuggle. She definitely baby wears and just wants to be near them always. She hates to hear them sad and will drop everything to cheer them up. They're her whole world. Especially so with the twins because I feel like it's harder for her to make friends in Belhalla than it was in Sigurds army. But she doesn't mind. She loves being super mom. She will often fall asleep in the rocking chair in the nursery please carry her to bed.

Nothing makes her happier than seeing her family together. Maybe it's watching Sigurd play wrestle with toddler Seliph. Or maybe Arvis is delighting the twins with simple little magic tricks. Even just everyone silently in the same room doing their own thing. Her face just lights up and she just drinks in the scene. Nothing is better. She wants that happy simple domestic life more than anything. She doesn't care about being the princess or the empress or money or castles or anything like that. She just wants to see her family enjoying each other.

[righteouscookiedough]

C2E8 Reactions

so after @mysticalspiders got me to start campaign three with her she politely suggested i may appreciate the pirate arc of campaign two. so i started watching the campaign a couple months ago. and boy am i IN IT now!!

let us begin:

That was a quality sam ad. A little too much mayonnaise perhaps.

AHHHHH ITS THE BABY ANNOUNCEMENT

Dont be shy baby it’s okay!!!

“What a good idea sam!! No!!”

“Maybe he was the traveller! Maybe I’m the traveller?”

Oh Caleb you poor tortured man

“We have a ring with a little blue gem—“ “can I have it? I like rings” *wiggles fingers*

Pub crawl!!

“You dont narrate taking a pooper but you assume your character takes a pooper once a day”

Yeahhhh first items!!!

“If you’re feeling gassy, they take away the cramps you feel” Liam is really focused on bowel movements tonight I hope he’s ok

I love the brjeaus

“You’re all intoxicated” “Not me cause I drink milk”

The wand of smiles omg

“Thank you for saving my life, Fjord,” “well, you would have done the same for me,” “yes I probably would have. Probably”

Laura Bailey miming opening and sniffing a jar of ‘pickled’ ears is everything to me

“I have this cat named Frumpkin and I wear him like a scarf”

Travis is allergic to cats check

“Im going to draw the CUTEST baby manticore you’ve ever seen! AND IT’S DEAD!”

Ooooh who is demedan

Travis is BLATANTLY reading over marisha’s shoulder

Fjord is… studying the locals… interesting

Bryce!! Yeahhhhh!!!

THE MIGHTY NEINNNNNN

“…and does not smell of blood and feces” “yet.”

THE RUBY OF THE SEA SAYS HELLO

“She’s mostly known for her hmm-hmm-hmm” “she has SEX for MONEY”

THE RUBY OF THE SEA IS THE… BEST LAY EVER “it sounds better in infernal”

This is very bells hells of jester to just say everything from her backstory

“I’m a goblin” sam riegal you big fat liar

Oh my god its marisha’s broken rib sneeze

“Do you know a birthday song too?” “No.”

Ooooh date drop

Back on the road againnnn

BREAK

Marisha stay frosty

“GOOD TO SEE YOU GENTLEMEN”

They are sad we’re headed for initiative but happy that there are NEIN antagonists

“We all have EXTREME syphilis” good one Caleb

OH NO THAT’S WHERE WE GOT OUT SYPHILIS FROM

Oh my god this is terrible

“Dirty.. poor… missing teeth… they look like Caleb”

Matt playing eight teenage dirtbags at once is so funny

“Sorry, I caught one of them”

“I put my hands up and try to cover his blood holes”

WHAT an encounter damn

OH YEAH NOTT GOT HORSES

Of fucking course sam riegal names horses Loo, John, Crapper, and Toilet

Jester leaving a horse with clothes on the side of the road is such anti imogen energy

Caleb what the FUCK is up with you

Dont worry this party has reeeaaaallllllly high perception

Oooh abandoned graveyard I hope nothing bad happens

Nope just stinky Caleb

“The dwendalian empire kind of sucks, you guys”

The gates of zadash!!!! Its the titular role!!!

This Ulysses guy has BIG even hytroga vibes

“What is a watch?” “Like a clockenticken”

YEAH NAT20 INSIGHT CHECK

Chain whispers. Also known as high stakes telephone

MONORAIL AYYYYYYEEEE

Any place with pulp fiction and shitty smut *insight checks*

Firbolg!!

The firbolg is de-stinkifying Caleb!!!!

OH MY GOD ITS PUMAT SOL

HOW DID I NOT KNOW PUMAT SOL WAS A FIRBOLG

Enchanter Pumat Sol I love you

Pink backpack!!!! It’s pink!!!!!!

“He is instantly at the top” - Travis about Pumat Sol. He is right.

And thats all!!!

[tangowatchesjj]

Jessica Jones S1E7

He's in her house!!! Get the fuck out, stinky man!!!

Everything about him is just. The worst.

Oh No Ruben you should not have said that to him, he's going to kill you.

"Got a dollar?" She does not, she is a disaster. Enjoy your free sub!

Man she is going to be spotted like, immediately, she's not even trying to hide that she's following her! Although maybe that's the point? She wants Wendy to see her?

Oh Jess. Why are you threatening Wendy she doesn't deserve this.

JESS WHAT THE FUCK YOU DROPPED HER!!! SAVE HER GOD DAMN.

JUST JUMP OUT OF THE WAY ARE YOU SUICIDA - Oh.

She's really going off the rails. Or on the rails. Sorry, bad joke.

Is Ruben dead?? Is he dead???? The cake is on the table OH FUCK

How does Jess not have blood on her face from when she put her hand over her mouth?

It's murdering time - oh, guess not. Jail time!

Can you stop having sex for 5 minutes to pick up the phone, please.

Trish tops, confirmed.

Trish I mean she probably would but she's got bigger things going on right now and you are gonna regret not picking up the phone.

Kilgrave does deserve to die but we need evidence to save Hope.

"Top shelf criminals." Roll credits!

OH NO. WHAT ARE YOU GONNA DO TO RUBEN'S BODY?

Malcolm what are you gonna do???

I hate Ruben's sister but damn she does not deserve this.

He is not just a boy?? Yeah tell her Malcolm.

Yeah that's a much better message than "I want to have your babies" but also OW my heart.

DAMN Wendy is a badass!!!!

Who are these children. Why are you here Jessica. Is this Trish's mum??

Oh my god Trish was Hannah Montana.

SHE WAS ON DRUGS???

Wow I hate Trish's mum already, she's a piece of shit.

"Thanks, Mom." I love the sass.

Oh what a fucking liar, Simpson has a macho hero complex and it is some bullshit.

Malcolm <3333

Trish stop pointing a gun at Malcolm, please, there are better people (Kilgrave) to shoot.

Oh my god the intro song playing while she's on the bridge, my heart.

jESS

I'm really sad.

"You're exactly the hero I wanted you to be." AAAAAAAAA I'M CHEWING GLASS

Oh god, he's recreating everything from her childhood home.

How has. NO ONE LOOKED UP??? SHE IS RIGHT THERE, COVERED IN WATER HOLDING A SEVERED HEAD?

jeri let her go to supermax.

Jessica asking for imprisonment is so suspicious. You should know that won't work.

Okay the throwing stuff might work. IS THAT BRETT? BRETT!!!

OH MY GOD OH MY GOD

"Milk toast little man-boy." That's funny I hate that Kilgrave is funny.

"That we're inevitable." OK, THANOS??

OK I know I only pointed out the funny bits but like. The scene was so good and I cannot express everything good about it right now so you get the funnies.

Jessica should have gotten on a plane in episode 1.

Teen Jess! And Miss Bitch, ugh.

What wrong conclusions is Simpson gonna draw from this.

Also, absolutely chilling episode end.

[raynewritingdownthoughts]

sun apr 2nd, 2023

yesterday was a really good time getting a tattoo on the same arm as my best friends and being able to talk about cremaster, books, life events. it’s nice to be around older people because they often have figured out that numbing doesn’t work. sobriety is the way you can avoid fucking up your life, existing with the pain, overcoming. i think this is why older people see me as so wise. i’m doing the work now that they realized to do later. maybe not everyone, but i think many notice my wisdom! i’m not afraid to be vulnerable. who i am. healthy shame ONLY please!

morgan has been more open with her expressions towards me, which feels like a big shift after feeling so distant and unwanted. we still haven’t hung out but i feel that she’s aware of my importance in her life. i’ve always wanted to be there, but also i want to be wanted!

my tattoo is very cute. today was a lot though. just a bunch of stinky customers with too much entitlement. disrespect for a space really makes me so upset. whether it’s mine or someone else’s. doesn’t make a difference. be kind to environments! remind yourself it’s not your space to just splay out when you’re being welcomed into a space that’s well-crafted and fragile!

most of the day went by without thinking about ado but i am getting a little paranoid he sees my blog or that andrea might tell that friend of hers more about me and i don’t want her to know my life and compare herself to me. i know it’s not in my hands. but it’s just so disturbing when people can not know you and decide you’re messed up. when ado was the one who began messing with me and i acted as i never have in my life. idk. i think i’m still processing some guilt about cheating. it just wasn’t me at all. that’s not me. what also wasn’t me was letting a man come into my life and act like the person for me only to start making me small. that’s not me. i’m big, with a big heart, with big eyes, with big love that can be trusted.

my back is hurting bad. i’m so sleepy from working so hard this week. it feels like i worked really hard for 3 days straight. need to catch up on sleep because of last night. wish i could finish a movie but it’s not going to happen. still haven’t really cleaned house. but it’s ok. it’s rare when the house is in this state. it’s been a week with sickness and a lot of work, so i may pardon myself. it’ll get done because i care about it being done.

kit has been kind of obnoxious this week after work! i think he just misses me

anyway. i need to get my eating back on track. really important to go to the grocery store.