#i probably could rush it and finish this chapter but honestly i dont want to put out something without at least having one round of editing

[hailsatanacab]

No cetbwa update tomorrow guys, sorry! I'm also probably going to move the update schedule around a bit—I'm thinking maybe the first Friday of every month?—because we're catching up to my backlog and I'm not happy about it haha

So next chapter will be up on the 7th of Oct, see you then!!! 😊

[sunlightfeeling]

so..... how did you get into smap, anyway? (i would like to hear the origin story)

hiii anon! i would love to tell this story!!

first the elevator pitch version:

like a lot of more recent fans (i.e. post-JE launch), i was a victim (affectionate) of the RGG to SMAP pipeline

…bit of a boring story, and honestly isn’t a real indication of how I got to have this brain (affectionate, i love having five old men stewing in my brain all hours of the day 👍😬)

sooo im going to tell the story of how the pipeline hit me so hard 😄

the real origin goes back to 2021…

(im gonna make a cut for this story because this is gonna be long long - i promise this isn’t an exaggeration)

so back in 2021, i had an xbox one and game pass (side note: game pass is so worth it, actually fantastic)

and I found a series that I had never heard of…Yakuza

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=hX9EomZwntU

sorry

anyway

downloaded Yakuza 0 and started it up

really dug the vibes, story, music, legitimately everything

then I reached Majima’s first chapter and ooooh the opening got me good

not too long after getting to this chapter, I was graciously gifted a ps5

and one of the first things i did was…

…impulsively buy every Yakuza release on ps4

…and the Judgments as soon as I realized they were under RGG’s umbrella

…after only playing like probably less than 10 hours of a prequel

(disclaimer: i do not mean to romanticize/minimize impulse purchasing; I’m more trying to give an accurate image of how deeply invested I got in a series that essentially sent me on my path; i was/am very fortunate and cognizant of how lucky i am to be able to cover/shield myself from consequences of my actions - so to speak lol)

probably six-ish months and 2 hiatuses later, I reached Y6

and i dont know if it was because the game was the last Kiryu game (at the time) and I was getting all emotional, or if it was because the likeness to Kuroda was pretty…

<stares at pictures of Y6 Kiryu way too long>

…preeeetty 🫠

i started developing (what knowing what i know now call) a hyperfixation on not just Y6 but also Kuroda Takaya lol

basically listened to his music whenever I could/on repeat; Y6 was the only thing I wanted to spend my free time playing; etc etc etc

(for reasons, this fixation actually led me to consider my possible neurodivergence; I wonder why 🤔..🥲)

finish Y6 and become baseline-which-isnt-really-baseline normal about Yakuza when I play LAD7

but then….

“Alex, stop hyperlinking sound effects”

(affectionate)

yeahhh it’s Judgey Time

okay so ive mentioned in tags somewhere but i actually didnt have high hopes for Judgment

at all

the cover just didn’t do anything for me at all…

…and i thought the protagonist was ugly 💀

(im actually genuinely serious, this isn’t me “not like the other girls”ing; i vividly recall looking at the cover when it was about time for me to start playing it and whining to my then-bf that I wasn’t sure I was gonna like it cuz the guy looks really weird 🤣)

but i booted it up and right when Yagami shows off his badge in the prologue

girl

giiiiiirl

I didn’t realize at the time but the seed had been planted and baby that beanstalk grew

Halloween 2022 (and I only know this date for a fact because I memorialized it texting then-bf about it) is the day I decided to look up who this guy really was

I can’t recall what made me finally look him up, whether lurking on the Yakuza subreddit or just something in the game, I dunno

i shared it once but I’ll share it anytime i can…

^^ this was my first Kimura photo

the first one I actually paid more than just a passing glance at anyway……

…i finished judgment in like two/three weeks [and not in a rushed playthrough by any means - getting all the cats, doing all the side cases/romance, etc.] (have a text trail of me going into the finale and date stamp is p exactly two weeks from Halloween 🥲)

started lost judgment immediately because i have texts days after this bitching about dropping money on the dlc before even starting it lol (again: not recommending/romanticizing; just giving perspective on how active my brain was about RGG/Kimura already)

now this…..this is where my timeline gets fuzzy

because i cant really remember how fast i beat lj before starting his dramas

or if maybe i started them before even finishing the game

skipping ahead to January 2023 and I’ve definitely wrapped lj by this point

and have watched a fair amount of kimura dramas (i genuinely cant give a number tho 😭)

around this point, ive determined that im fairly confident in being audhd

and i personally would have described kimura as a combined special interest-hyperfixation at this point (because the intensity would ebb and flow in a way)

started collecting things, starting with his albums and his live recordings (and eventually a lot lot more [I’ll get back to scanning consistently eventually I promise lol])

the defining moment to when I finally crossed from Kimura to SMAP…

…was actually watching Go with the Flow

I had heard bits of SMAP, but, as many unfortunately discover, accessibility to their music is…..well it’s just not there lol

I even got YouTube Music because I found playlists of SMAP performances and could just listen to them while I was working or driving

not that I could really hear them all that well since they were all live performances w screaming or muffled audio/crunchy audio/remixes/etc etc etc

(except for pams seigi shoutout to pams seigi [sorry goro 😔; also i linked that specific one for the tags but please look in the reblogs for a diff version of seigi that they did because it’s ridiculously good])

On Go with the Flow, Kimura performs “Style” which made me go on basically a witch-hunt to find the song since it wasn’t an album track and I didn’t know SMAP’s discography

Eventually found out it was SMAP (Kimura solo on s.m.a.p specifically) and decided that I actually really needed to listen to SMAP

aaaaaand I did ☺️

and then I found Jes yeah no I definitely didn’t

and…that is my SMAP origin story

[lesbiten]

finished leopardstars honor! final notes from the last 100 pages: -the editing got really bad towards the end. i genuinely dont think anyone proofread a good chunk of the last couple of chapters. there were so many continuity errors that it almost makes me think they ran out of time to publish the book and just sent it though

-in a similar vein, the ending was also extremely rushed. the point of a leopardstar super edition to my understanding was to get a view on her perspective on tigerstar and tigerclan. so why was only ~80 pages of the book focused on that? the exposition in her early life was nice, but some of it definitely seemed like it was just kate cary wanting to write fanfiction about her fave. which is fine and all i guess, but why advertise it as a book about leopardstars leadership and her biggest mistake when its largely a book talking about her upbringing and her relationships with her clanmates? this also didnt make much sense to me considering the sheer number of books we have now that extensively describe the events of the first arc. it was obvious at multiple points in the book that the authors were limited by the fact that weve seen leopardstars words and actions from firestars point of view, so it was limited in what they could have her do or say regardless of the new character arc they'd given her earlier in the book. they could write her feelings, but it didnt really matter when what she said was still the same generic antagonistic character lines she had in the first arc. thats the problem with constantly rewriting the same events, you literally cannot change what happens, so it becomes extremely difficult to insert complexity where there wasn't any before.

-why introduce a plot line about a prophecy, imply over and over again its true, *end the book* pushing the idea that its true, and then...not really reinforce that through anything that happens? once again, this is the problem you have when you try to insert complexity into parts of the series that were not meant to be complex. leopardstar was an important character in the first arc, sure, but only because she was a participant in tigerstars evil plans. she did not ever actively try to "save the clans", and honestly, this book doesn't try to make you believe she did either. its still very obviously firestar who masterminds every act of rebellion against tigerstar, while she's kind of just. there watching. and going "oh no i wish this wasn't happening!" truly what was the point of a prophecy that wasn't true. imo a prophecy warning mudfur of some vague "important choice" she would have to make would have worked so much better with the narrative. particularly because she had *so many* arguably important choices that could have thrown her off throughout the book (i.e. frogleap, disobeying crookedstars orders, trying to keep windclan out, etc) until she finally reached the decision to join tigerclan, in which she clearly believed she was making the right decision until it was too late. the vague "you're destined to save us!" prophecy was lame when she was still a background character in the events happening!!

-this book seriously could have and probably should have just been a novella. only the last 80 or so pages were important and they were horribly written due to using the first 430 pages to write fluff and exposition about borders and sunningrocks and whatnot. the only truly interesting parts of the book, besides tigerclan, were leopardstars personal relationships with her clanmates. reading over and over again about sunningrocks is draining. please stop erin hunter im begging you. there should have been at least another 100 pages dedicated to putting more detail into her participation in tigerclan. there were way too many time skips at the end, and many of them went completely unmentioned until it was implied that a few days or even months had passed, and you just had to rewire your view of the rest of what you'd just read to put it into different context. if you're getting to a point where you have to skip major plot points because you don't have enough room to include them, you need to go back and evaluate what you spent your time on in the earlier parts of the book.

[princeanxious]

Hay so could your holladay gift maaayyybbbeee be that new Lost Guardian chapter? Yaknow the one with The Reveal?? Maybe??? I’ve been following that fic basically since chapter 1 went up and I still love it but I misss ittttt (no pressure tho, I just really like it)

Okay to be fair, I love and adore this idea now that its been brought to my attention!!

However, its with a v heavy heart that i must inform you that at this point, it being 11 days till christmas, i do not have any extended free time available to dedicate to writing and finishing that chapter between now and christmas. And, even if i did, it'd probably come out rather rushed and half-baked and i honestly probably wouldn't be happy with that result and the last thing i need to keep my tether of wanting to finish tlg strong is to have to rewrite another chapter(as one of my stone walls atm is rewriting chapter 1)

Im sorry this isnt the answer you hoped for, I really am. Cause i really really love TLG with all my heart, bc theres so much I havent been able to expand on still. I just havent had the time and energy and even just the focus to write anything cohesive lately, and i dont know when i will.

I could promise to try and finish it late but I know that its just not a promise I can even remotely keep right now. (And let me tell ya, even as more of a digital artist than a creative writer, not being able to write anymore at all upsets me way more than you might think)

So, Im sorry. :(

[charmspoint]

5, 9, 16, 21!

5) Do you like one shots or multi-chapters?

I heavily prefer multi chapters in both writing and reading. Writing cuz the pacing just suits me better and it feels like it gives me a lot more room to steadily explore what I want too explore. This goes for double cuz i usually tend to deal with psychological themes and it takes good time to properly unravel things like that. I also prefer reading multi chapters because I need that segmentation of story in my head. Like, i've been procrastinating reading some very fandom popular works because they have huge wordcounts all condensed into one chapter and that just looks exhausting to me, I think my upper reading limit is like 10k per chapter n even thats really pushing it. Also I comment on all the stories i read as a rule and that also helps me compartmentalize the information i received by bringing it up in the comment so when i dont get that chance i just end up forgetting like 70% of the fic by the time i get to the comment box. This is why if i'm gonna read a really long one shot i just tend to write comment notes on my phone or in word so i can properly bring up everything i want to mention.

9) Do you visualize scenes in your head before you write them? (Can you picture the setting, character body language etc)

Yeah! I usually do this while walking around and listening to music, I tend to imagine a lot of action scenes and like key emotional moments like this. But also if I'm not listening to music I'm in brain type writer mode and just sorta tell myself the scene as i walk and then takes notes on my phone for things i particularly like. So i imagine them both as actual images and as words.

16) Do you have a method for getting characters to sound/feel in character?

:) I do not and this is one of my biggest worries hgvgh i feel like every character i write just sounds more or less like me jbjh but Ker said I'm fine and here and there people praise my characterization so i figure its probably passable uwu.

21) Writers choice - pick any of these questions that you want to answer.

Lets seeeee I'm gonna pick 7) How do you edit your fics? What do you look for in your edits? cuz ive been doing the gang au prequel edit so its on my mind

So editing for me varies a lot, like some fics ill just do a quick edit and throw them out, some ill go full sicko mode (gang au) but here is the most complex it can get (again, gang au)

So I finish writing

Stage 1. First Lucy edit additional info edition - in this edit i expand scenes i think ended up too rushed and add in new scenes in places where it seems they could be of use, obviously this is optional if i think what i write is fine as it is

Stage 2. First Lucy edit actual editing edition - here I do the actual editing aka i go through the document and correct mistakes or awkward phrasing or what grammar i can pick out (not the best at that part). I pay attention to how things sound and flow and also to common mistakes Ker pointed out i make. One of mine is that i tend to get stuck on one word and repeat it thorough the chapter a lot so i try to pay attention to that (tho in the last thing ker edited they said i didnt repeat a word but i did repeat a structure so....progress?)

Stage 3. Ker edit! - I hand the doc over to Ker. Their job is primarily grammar and wording since those are my weak points but i also usually give them free hands to note on anything that seems off and ask for extra stuff depending on what im doing. Ex. Since Gang au prequel is a one shot that's being split into chapters i asked them to keep an eye on pacing and the way i segmented the fic aka if they think a chapter should end early or go on longer and be connected with another chapter and so on. I will use this opportunity to once again say that Ker is the best beta and i love them so much and they do such amazing work and they honestly helped me improve and learn a whole lot i love you Ker <3<3<3<3

Stage 4. Post Ker edit - Here is where i go through the document and fix up all the stuff Ker marked. I usually do grammar first and then go down the document fixing the 'reword this' or 'expand on this' type corrections

Stage 5. Final reread - this either happens immediately after stage 4 or some time after depending on how i'm posting but basically this is just me reading through the story again with a bit of a fresher perspective, making sure all the edits work well together and catching any overlooked mistakes

Then the story is ready to post!

ask game

[stutterfly]

Swipe Right 01 | Context Switch | JJK (M)

Rating: M (Explicit 18+)

Pairings: Jungkook x Reader, brot7 x friendship

Genre: E2L, fluff, angst [later on], humor, [eventual] smut, PersonalTrainer!Jungkook, fuckboy!Jungkook, Nerd!Jungkook, Nerd/IT!Reader

Word Count: 12.8K

Fic Summary: Jungkook wasn’t always like this. Or maybe he was and you don’t want to admit that he had you fooled. You quickly discover he has a lot more to offer than exchanging pleasantries and awkward small talk. In fact, he never seems to shut up.

For the better part of a year, he’s held your irritation hostage, never passing up an opportunity to deliver savage one-liners at your expense. When he discovers you’re on Tinder, he turns up the brattiness factor and intentionally seeks you out. Who knows? Maybe if you gave him a chance he could charm the pants right off of you. Then again, maybe he’s just a fuckboy.

Tags: Fuckboy Jungkook, like cannot stress enough Fuckboy Jungkook but gets soft later, dirty jokes, talk nerdy to me, PUNS, friendship feels, sexual tension, Jin being bad at copying Mario’s accent, Namjoon being bad at accents

CW:  panic attacks, filthy language, this whole chapter is setup so like nothing too bad i dont think???

Series: Activate your SIMCard Fic: Swipe Right (1/?- Ongoing) Do not repost. masterlist // next chapter

(A/N: This is part of my “Activate Your SIMcard” series. Each member of BTS has their own AU in which IT/TechSupport/NerdReader gets dating help/advice and ends up falling in love with them instead. As with a dating sim, the same characters are utilized--same professions, similar scenario placement-- but different interactions/pathways lead to different romances. ~Anyway here’s the Jungkook route.~ The Namjoon route, “Love Bytes” is currently in the works.)

⊱ ────── {.⋅ ✯ ⋅.} ────── ⊰

Nerves wrack your stomach as you make your way down the hall, clinging to the man beside you. His strides seem gigantic next to yours and you find yourself struggling to keep up with him. “Stop walking so fast, Namjoon.”

The man laughs, but slows his pace just enough to allow you to walk side-by-side. “Sorry. I’m just excited for you to meet them.”

Digging your fingernails into the flesh of his elbow, you swallow hard. It’s been a couple months since the young English professor stumbled into your life holding the pieces of some very expensive, very shattered college property. State of the art technology, brand new, busted in less than a week of his arrival. He’d get the biggest chew-out of his life if he presented it to your boss, and you were too sympathetic to let that happen.

While you’d willingly paid for the whole thing out of pocket to cover for the newbie, it had definitely put a strain on your finances and what little social life you had. Within a week he’d worked up a repayment plan than spanned the course of a year. He even started buying you a coffee every Friday as an apology for how long it was going to take.

After a few months of bonding over kung-fu movies, life before Namjoon’s friendship seemed like a distant past, a hazy dream. It was natural that your new bestie wanted to grow your pitiful social circle. But there was a reason you didn’t let people get close to you. The fact that Namjoon had slipped past your defenses so fast made him an anomaly worth dissecting for scientific discovery.

Just the thought of having to now socialize with people you don’t know has your temperature boiling and your head spinning.

He attempts to tug his elbow away from you, and you stumble forward, keeping your death grip on him. “I know, but talking to people isn’t exactly my strong suit. Are you sure it’s best I meet all six at once?”

“You’ve already met Jimin,” he begins, clawing at your hand with long, veiny fingers until you release your hold on him, “but he’s not coming tonight, so don’t worry... you can relax a little.”

Your face twists into a sour grimace as you try to sputter out a response. “I-Pfft. I mean. Jimin’s a model. His face is on billboards and shit. Like… how is that supposed to not be intimidating?”

“Jimin is the world’s biggest sweetheart,” he laughs, shoving his hands into his pockets as you continue down the hallway. “You don’t have anything to be afraid of. I have a feeling you two will get along fine once you stop being so shy.”

You huff and tick your jaw a few times before wringing your hands together. Maybe.

“Anyway. Taehyung is out of town on business, but you can meet him another time. He’s kind of quiet when meeting new people too. Hoseok and Yoongi texted they might be a little late. It’ll just be Jin and Jungkook you’re meeting now. And it’ll be just the four of us for a bit.”

A deep breath escapes you as you hook your elbow with his. “Okay. I just… I’m nervous.”

He stops at the door at the end of the hall and looks down at you. “Give them a chance. If you’re still feeling bad in an hour, then we’ll leave, and I’ll hang out with y’all separately from now on. Deal?”

You eye his extended palm peeking out from beneath the crook of your twined elbows before a smile creeps across your face. You shake his hand. He always knows what to say. “Deal.”

As Namjoon knocks, you leave the comfort of his side, realizing how your anxious clinging might be mistaken for a romantic gesture. You begin to shrink back, trying to hide in his shadow before the door opens. You’re about halfway there when a young, well-built man appears, prominent leg muscles bulging from beneath his basketball shorts as he props the door open with his foot. There’s a cup of instant noodles in his hands, and you’re pretty sure at least half of its contents are dangling from his mouth.

The scent of garlic and rosemary drifts into your nostrils, and you freeze as you cower behind Namjoon, realizing how long it’s been since you last had a decent home-cooked meal. You were promised free food so maybe it won't be so bad after all.

“Ah, Namjoon,” he greets and gestures with his head towards the domicile. “Come in--Oh!”

He chokes a chunk of noodles back into the paper cup as he notices your figure standing behind the tall man.

“Jungkook, this is Y/N,” Namjoon says, stepping to the side and pushing you out into the light of the apartment “I told you she was coming tonight, remember?”

Jungkook’s dark brown eyes widen and he pumps a fist into his chest a few times as he tries to get the remnants of spicy noodles dislodged from the back of his throat. Namjoon sent a bunch of texts this week making sure it was cool to bring someone to hangout night since he’d made a friend at work and wanted everyone to meet them. The way the texts were worded definitely didn’t give any indication that the friend he was bringing tonight was a woman. Maybe they did. Maybe he should have read more of them.

The muscular man before you holds the remaining food in his cheeks and waves bashfully with two fingers as he swallows. "Jungkook," he mumbles, as if the name itself is introduction enough and all but sprints from the room.

Seconds later, a new voice shrieks out from the other room. “What are you doing eating that?! Dinner will be ready soon! Jungkookie if you don’t put that down--!”

A dull smacking sound accompanies the clattering of silverware and plates. You swallow hard, trying to think about anything other than the way the young man had rushed out of the room at just the sight of you. Maybe you’re just that ugly.

“Hey! I’ll eat! I’ll eat! I promise!” Jungkook cries out. His voice drops an octave. “Namjoon is here.” Their conversation becomes indiscernible, but you can’t shake the feeling that you are definitely the subject of their quiet discussion.

You throw a worried glance in Namjoon's direction. "Did I do something wrong?" your voice is hushed as you work your sneakers off, trying to hold in the crazy amount of anxiety that threatens to unscrew the top of your head and send your brain exploding into the ceiling.

Namjoon shakes his head, unbothered by his friend’s odd behavior. "Honestly, I texted him a bunch this week to make sure it was cool and I got one-word replies so I'm wondering if he even read them." He bites his lip and spares a glance back at you, knowing he probably should have kept that to himself.

"Oh," your heart sinks into your stomach and threatens to fall out your butt as you straighten your spine. "If that's the case, should I... leave?"

"Leaf?!" A bright green piece of lettuce is thrust into your face. "How about a whole salad? You can't go before you try it! It's unbe-leaf-able."

You blink in rapid succession, trying to stifle a laugh at the cackle emanating from the man whose bony fingers are holding the lettuce. It sounds like a... windshield wiper? A giggle slips out, stronger than your will to keep it tucked behind your lips, and it only seems to make the grin on his face stretch impossibly wider. Heavy shoulders rise and fall with his laughter, causing the bright pink apron across his chest to wrinkle.

Namjoon groans. "This is--"

"Now do you smell that delicious flavor in the air? Because this just a taste of what you will find at my amazing restaurant 'Heart and Seoul'," he announces, cutting off the man beside you as he clutches the lettuce to his chest with eyes closed. "Where I give you a piece of my heart and soul... Some refer to me as Worldwide Handsome, others call me the God of Cookery. Some call me an angel and believe I fell from heaven." He bows with a flourish and takes your hand in his. "But you can call me..." He finally looks at you, a dark smoulder in his features that sets your cheeks on fire. "Later?"

He seals your fate with a gentle kiss to the back of your hand. Your jaw, which has been hanging open for some time, finally decides to snap itself shut.

"This is Seokjin, and he's going back into the kitchen to finish making dinner." Namjoon is already ushering his friend back towards the kitchen and chiding him as you purse your lips together to hide the smile spreading across your face. Did you just stumble into some alternate universe where all of the men you meet are ridiculously good-looking?

"It's nice to meet you, Seokjin," you call after them before letting your eyes wander around the room.

Paintings line the walls and photos sit on the bookshelf in the corner. As you approach the shelf to get a closer look, you realize those aren't books, but video games. There must be hundreds. Don't people use cloud storage for most of their games now? Your eyes curiously scan the photos on the top shelf. The man who had introduced himself as Jungkook is in all of them. There's another man in a couple that you don't recognize, but his gaze is piercing and cold when he's not smiling. You're able to pick Jimin and Namjoon out in a few, but it feels like looking at a family photo. Everyone seems so close; it makes you envious.

You lick your lips and can't help but admire the collection of video games underneath. You crouch to get a better look at the ones lining the bottom shelf. You're surprised to see there are games for all types of consoles: PS4, XboxOne, Switch, WiiU, Nintendo DS, SuperNintendo, PlaystationVita, PC... The list keeps going. Jealousy spikes your gut as you note a Mass Effect "SSV Normandy" ship figurine on the shelf above your head. You eye it with wonder and pride as your memories flood with the hours you spent playing the trilogy. Your fingers reach out to brush against the raised letters on the side of the ship.

"Have you played Mass Effect?" a quiet voice asks from behind you.

You jump in place and spin on the balls of your feet in a fluid motion that nearly sends you careening into the basketball shorts in front of you. Surprised by how close Jungkook is standing, you gasp and stumble back into the bookshelf, causing it to wobble and bring some of the frames filled with photos tumbling down onto your head. You wait for the impact but it never comes.

As you look up, Jungkook has several frames balanced on his arms and between his fingers, carefully maneuvering them away from you and back onto the shelf. "I'm sorry! I didn't mean to scare you! Namjoon told me you liked video games too and I saw you looking at the Normandy and I thought maybe you've played it. Ah, I'm sorry."

It's hard to miss the crestfallen way he rubs the back of his neck and stares at the floor once he places all the photos back on the shelf. You're still in shock that he caught everything before it smacked you in the head, but you force yourself to respond anyway. "No, it's okay. I'm just a jumpy person. It's my fault. I'm just glad I didn't break anything. I'm... asari? Get it? 'Cause like, I'm sorry... but also hot blue alien chicks, am I right?"

He smiles wide and laughs softly as he offers to help you up. As you take hold of his hand, you're quickly thrust to your feet with an ease you weren’t quite expecting. You steady yourself by reaching out to grip his arm, a movement you reverse the moment you feel the firm muscles beneath his t-shirt.

"Thanks," you mumble. Feeling his hand tense around yours, you take it back and twiddle your fingers. "So what decisions did you make? Renegade or Paragon? Rachni Queen? Samara's mission? Quarian and Geth dispute? Genophage?" You pause only to take a breath. "If you let Wrex die, we can't be friends."

He blinks at you a few times before breaking into a relaxed smile. “Of course not. What kind of monster do you think I am?”

You allow a relieved sigh to pass your lips. Maybe this wouldn’t be so painful after all.

⊱ ────── {.⋅ ✯ ⋅.} ────── ⊰

You must have made a good impression that night. It’s been nearly a month and Namjoon’s friends have started pulling you into their group texts and Saturday night plans. This had been fine by you since you rarely had anything going on. Honestly it was kind of nice to be included.

While you still don’t exactly know everyone, you feel fairly comfortable talking with your new friends. Seokjin is absolutely hilarious. He’s so full of himself that his cockiness rides the line between charming and annoying; it’s hard to decide which aspect overwhelms his personality more. But you know that you find him irrefutably, irritatingly attractive because of it.

Jungkook is still polite and rather gentlemanly towards you. Your conversation about Mass Effect was enough to tide over any residual awkwardness regarding your initial meeting. He’s just a muscular, nerdy introvert who seems genuinely nice. However, Namjoon insists that Jungkook is still hiding a louder, brattier side when you’re around. He’s got this theory that since you’re a friend of a friend, Jungkook is holding back his usual antics for some reason. The harmless little crush you’ve developed on him has you secretly holding out hope that it’s because he wants to ask you to be his girlfriend. You’ve considered asking Jin what he thinks, but that man has no tact and honestly you’re afraid he’d just ask Jungkook with you standing right there.

Hoseok is a ball of smiling energy, one who has been begging you to visit his dance studio. It’s hard to say no, but you’ve managed for this long because of the very real possibility that you won’t be able to do anything but stare at the dazzling way he moves. He seems to take pride in his ability to make others feel good and absolutely beams when he’s the cause of his friends’ happiness. You can easily see yourself talking to him without Namjoon around to act as a buffer, which is amazing for someone with your level of social anxiety.

Yoongi is quiet, but when he speaks his words are sharp with purpose. Some people might mistake that for coldness, but you can tell he has good intentions and a soft heart underneath. His pointed remarks in the group interrogations have poked fun at you, but never in a condescending or cruel manner. And it’s certainly not in the way you see him absolutely roast the others. Maybe he’s taking it easy on you.

Jimin is still so beautiful to look at it devastates you, leaving a flustered, stuttering mess behind every time he leaves. Now that he’s become aware of the effect he has on you, he’s been testing the waters of your friendship with some teasing that borderlines flirtation. But you have a feeling he’s just screwing with you because he finds it funny to see you squirm. You’re hoping to build the confidence to dish it back some day.

Taehyung has been a little standoff-ish, but Namjoon had already warned you about that. You wonder if it’s because he’s a hundred times richer than you’ll ever be. Despite seeming like he’s in a different social class, he still seems deeply fond of his friends, and relatively down-to-earth. He’s a bit quirky, but he’s an artist, so you expect that kind of thing.

Namjoon says that he’s known almost all of them since college, so he’s been able to absorb most of the discomfort associated with meeting new people. He’s sweet, and more relatable than you originally would have thought for an English professor. He’s kind of like a pillar that you never knew your life had been missing. And now that he’s got your back, you can’t go back.

The smell of coffee pervades the air as you skim an article on your phone regarding the latest Halloween skins for Overwatch. You’re supposed to be meeting Namjoon here but Seokjin, and Jimin showed up and have been chatting about their plans for the weekend. Apparently they throw a Halloween party every year and it’s Jimin’s turn to host. Seokjin is supposedly in charge of planning the decorations due to his love for theatrics and has been discussing the possibility of a haunted house walkthrough. You smile at the thought of Seokjin popping out of the shadows to drop fake spiderwebs on people. It sounds like the kind of thing he’d get off to.

Namjoon flops down on the couch next to you. “You’re coming, right?”

You’re broken from your thoughts as you scroll further down the page. “E-Excuse me?”

“The Halloween party. You coming?”

You look up from your phone, feeling everyone’s eyes on you. “I mean… I don’t want to intrude on your group thing.”

“You’re not intruding!” Jimin, Jin, and Namjoon’s voices all stack upon each other and you’re taken aback by the sound.

Jin frantically scrambles to make you feel included. “Y/N, we just assumed you were coming. Of course you’re invited! You can help me get everything set up for the scary walkthrough. Please come.”

“Don’t give her work to do that you should have already figured out,” Jimin hisses before sending a warm smile your way. “I’ll text you the address later. It’s a costume party so make sure to dress up!”

Your bottom lip unconsciously protrudes in a pout as you pass a discouraging look Namjoon’s way. “What are you going as?”

He gives you a heartfelt, dimpled smile. “Sherlock Holmes,” he says with the worst british accent you’ve ever heard in your life. “World’s greatest detective.” He drops his accent and starts gushing. “The tweed suit is fairly iconic and most people will recognize the costume so I think it’s a safe option. Originally, I was going to go as Judge Di but Jimin kept telling me no one would get it. It would take some research to really get a feel for how he’d dress, but I’d be willing to put in the work.”

Your eyebrows furrow. “Judge Dee? Like…. Judge... Ju...dy?” you trail off in confusion, immediately regretting your decision to ask.

Jimin throws his hands up as if this is the proof he’s needed to convince his friend that he’s wrong. “You see? I told you no one knows who that is.”

“Judge---! Really?!” Namjoon looks like he’s about to go off, but he shakes his head and sighs. “You know what? It’s okay. I look really good in a tweed suit. That’s all that matters.” He finished his statement by gesturing towards his chest.

You can’t help but laugh. “You’re such a dork.” You turn your attention to the others and raise your eyebrows at them. “What about you two?”

Jimin drags his teeth over his lip and shyly smiles. “I’m going as Iron Man. Tae’s been helping me build my costume for a while now.”

“Jungkookie and I are going as Luigi and Mario,” Jin proudly states he leans forward, resting his elbows on his knees while tenting his fingers. “I’m Mario, of course, since everyone knows he’s the best.”

You roll your eyes. “Sounds like you, Seokjin.”

“What will you come as?” he questions with a smirk, cocking a mischievous eyebrow at you.

“Well...” you hesitate, knowing that most costume shops will be sold out of anything interesting or slutty; at this point your options are limited unless you want to be a Crayola shit brown crayon. “I’m not sure yet,” you mumble, scratching your cheek sheepishly. “I only found out just now so I don’t have anything ready. I usually go over Jennie’s place, hand out candy in my pajamas and watch scary movies, so I don’t know if I should bail on her like that.”

Solid excuse. Great job, brain. Really. Can I sound like more of a loser?

“She can come too,” Jimin offers with a thoughtful tilt of his head and a warm smile. “It’s a very open party. Lots of people will be coming and going, so it’s no trouble if you want to invite more of your other friends, if that makes you comfortable.”

Other friends. Like you have more than this group and Jennie. You’re going to just pretend like you didn’t hear that part. You can already hear her shrieking at you to say you’ll be there. She loves dressing up and would be more than happy to exchange a night of handing out candy for a night of partying. You suppose you can always get some vampire teeth and dab some fake blood on your mouth, but it feels like a cop-out. It’s a solid back-up plan at the very least.

“Okay. I’ll think about it,” you murmur with a fleeting look of panic directed at Namjoon.

He offers a sympathetic smile and pats your shoulder. “It’s okay if you don’t come. I’m just saying there will be free food.”

Your spine straightens and you perk up.

“Free food?” The words on you’re about to utter spill from a different source. A chin drops into the space between Namjoon’s shoulder and yours. Jungkook’s hair is still wet, but thankfully it’s not long enough to brush against your skin. The soft, sweet, almost floral scent of his body wash wafts into your nose as you turn your head to look at him. You surmise he’s come directly from work if he’s showering in the late afternoon. You internally swat the butterflies playing with your ribcage, trying to remember how to act normal.

Jungkook smiles sweetly, his eyes nearly closing with how high his cheekbones have risen. “Where is this food?”

“At the Halloween party,” Namjoon comments with a dismissing wave of his hand. “I was just telling Y/N that she’ll miss out if she doesn’t come.”

Jungkook raises his eyebrows and drops his smile as his surprised stare pierces your periphery. “Oh, you’re not coming?”

“I was thinking about it.” You immediately feel the need to defend yourself. “I don’t have anything to wear.”

“So don’t wear--” Jungkook catches himself before the word anything comes out. “A costume,” he finishes simply, straightening his spine and clearing his throat. “I mean we can make an exception. No one’s gonna kick you out.”

A devilish grin spreads across Seokjin’s features. “I’m sure I can help you find a pink dress and crown if you’d like to be our lovely Princess Peach. We can give each other items.”

Jungkook’s eyes widen at his friend and Jin stares back with anticipation, waiting for him to make the mushroom joke he clearly set him up for. Jungkook purses his lips and quietly regards you. As the moment passes, Jin’s brow furrows and he crosses his arms in a huff, wishing that he’d said it instead. It’s been too long since you’ve blushed for his liking.

“Maybe I’ll show up in a leotard, spiked collar, and fishnets as Bowsette instead.” You nearly snort at your own joke.

Jungkook and Jin spill their surprise over one another.

“Whaa? Really?” Jin’s mouth hangs open, the image already permanently searing its way into his brain.

“You what?” Jungkook clamps his hands over the edge of the couch, hulking figure looming over you.

While Jimin and Namjoon are both oblivious what a Bowsette is, the words “spiked collar and fishnets” have certainly grabbed their attention as well.

You blink a few times, realizing how serious everyone has become as you sputter out a nervous laugh. “Kidding, guys. Kidding.”

Jin tuts in disappointment, slinking back into his chair. Jimin simply smiles. Namjoon breathes a relieved sigh. Jungkook starts walking away, distracted by the signage on the counter promoting a cinnamon chocolate chip milkshake.

“Besides, I’m more of a…” A lightbulb flicks on in your head and the thought comes spilling out your mouth before you can process it. “Oh, I have a cosplay from the gaming convention I went to a year ago. Maybe I can wear that.”

All three men lean forward, suddenly very interested in the concept of you using a cosplay as a Halloween costume. Jungkook’s head snaps in your direction just as he extends his hand to give his money to the cashier, but he drops it prematurely, sending coins scattering across the counter.

The sound causes all of you to look over at him and he quickly turns back to the cashier. She raises her eyebrows at him as he scrambles to recover all of the money for her. His ears turn bright red from the attention and you can’t help but put yourself in his shoes, cringing at the embarrassment coursing through your veins at the thought of swapping places.

Spinning back to face the others, you find Jin and Jimin on the edge of their seats, staring at you. Namjoon blinks at you and tilts his head expectantly. “You were saying?” he prods. “Something about an anime costume?”

Suddenly you’re embarrassed for yourself rather than Jungkook. “Don’t be weird, Joonie. It’s just a Princess Zelda cosplay.” You scratch your cheek in contemplation, murmuring, “Actually, I don’t even know if it still fits since I’ve gained some weight since then.”

Namjoon pats your shoulder assuringly. “Ah you’re fine. Don’t worry too much about it, ok?”

“He’s right. Just bring your smile, cutie,” Jimin says encouragingly.

You blush at the nickname and grin in response. He said it innocently enough, but you get the feeling that you reacted exactly as he had hoped because he exchanges a smug smirk with Seokjin. “See? Bring that.”

“Ah, you guys are embarrassing me,” you mumble, diving back into the article on your phone. “I’ll talk to Jennie about it later.”

Jungkook listens carefully as he tongues his cheek and waits for his drink to arrive at the counter. Are you really going to show up in that? He pulls out his phone and starts skimming amazon. There’s no way he can pass up the opportunity, regardless of what’s at stake.

A familiar veiny hand sets the drink down on the counter, and he outstretches his palm. “Service was good, yeah?”

Jungkook looks up from the checkout page and locks eyes with Yoongi. He scoops a large portion of whipped cream from beneath the lid and pops it in his mouth thoughtfully, smacking his lips as he washes it down with a sip through his straw. Yoongi raises his eyebrows at him expectantly, but remains silent.

“Hmm, I’ve had better. Maybe if I had some more whipped cream?” Jungkook suggests as he tilts his cup forward and gives it the tiniest shake, shit-eating grin strewn across his features.

Unblinking, Yoongi squirts a puff of cream into the top of the container before loudly setting the can on the counter. Satisfied, Jungkook reaches into his pocket and fishes out some money for a generous tip. “See this is why you’re my favorite barista. You always make it just how I like it.”

Yoongi forces a smile as he stuffs the cash into the half-filled tip jar. “The Java Stop values your patronage, customer.”

He catches a glimpse of Jungkook’s phone screen before the younger man snatches it from the counter and walks away. What the hell is he up to?

⊱ ────── {.⋅ ✯ ⋅.} ────── ⊰

You curse your past self for choosing Zelda’s outfit from Twilight Princess rather than Breath of the Wild; style over comfort rarely is a good choice, but it’s a choice you often repeat without forethought. It’s tighter than you remember, and not just because there’s a corset sewn into the chestpiece. As you sit in the passenger’s seat of Jennie’s Civic, you fidget with the hem of your dress. Without taking her eyes off the road, she reaches over and slaps your hand.

“Stop it. You look great.”

You rub the back of your wrist and pout, knowing it does nothing to change her mind. You eye her tattered dress, wishing you could pull off something so slutty with the same confidence she does. White contacts make her look even more ethereal than she normally does. Natural waves and curls poke out from beneath the bent witch’s hat atop her head and you can’t help but admire her beauty.

“I look like a nerd,” you say, feeling shittier the longer you compare yourself to her. It’s not her fault. You’re just insecure and wish that you could be more like her rather than the you that you are.

“You are a nerd,” she laughs. “What’s wrong with that?”

You smile. “Nothing, I guess. I don’t know why I’m so worried about it. It’s not like I’m gonna be getting laid any time soon. This costume solidifies it.” Negativity is something you’re used to dosing yourself with, but you know it’s an action you need to work at correcting.

“Hey if no one wants to fuck you in a Zelda costume, do they even deserve to fuck you?” Jennie asks, wagging her pointer at the ceiling as if scolding some invisible source above. “I don’t fucking think so.” She tuts for a second. “So speaking of… Which ones are off limits?”

You scoff and stiffen in your seat, trying to play dumb. “What? What’s off limits?”

“Y/N,” she starts in an accusatory tone. “I’m sure there will be lots of hot people there, but I’m talking about seven hot people in particular. Now if they came up to me and said ‘hey Jennie you so fine you wanna suck all seven of our dicks?’ I’d be like hell yeah I’ma suck all seven dicks. Get in a circle and let me at ‘em.”

You smack your hand to your forehead, wishing you could purge that image from your brain.

“Now I’m just saying in this hypothetical situation that I would never turn down going down on any of them if they asked. Unless I remembered that one time you told me you were crushing, maybe, just maybe I wouldn’t suck that particular dick.”

“We’re about to go see these people. I don’t want to be thinking about this while sipping my drinks across from Seokjin. That man can smell fear, shame, and insecurity,” you mumble, looking out the window at the trees lining the side of the road.

“So that’s why we get it out now before we get there. Can’t possibly slip out if you’ve already got it out of your system,” she explains with a confident smirk.

You cross your arms and give yourself a moment to truly think about the seven men. You certainly find all of them attractive, but crossing that line might make things weird. But maybe, hypothetically… “I don’t know… They’re all pretty hot in their own way…”

“You’ve got to be attracted to one more than the others,” she prods. “Come on, Y/N. Which one does it for you?”

Your tongue clicks against the roof of your mouth before you sigh. “I guess…” You subconsciously lick your lips and give it a few seconds before the memory of falling picture frames surfaces in your mind. An embarrassed smile flickers across your face as you give your quiet, honest answer. “J-Jeon… Jungkook.”

“The young one!” Her mouth falls open. She drums her fingers against the steering wheel excitedly and spares a delightful, yet surprised look at you for a fraction of a second before her eyes return to the road. “Really? I never would have guessed. But I haven’t talked to him much honestly. Doesn’t he work at that nerdy-looking gym you almost joined? What was it, Iron Kingdom? You could always sign up for personal training. Ya know, get some one-on-one time with those muscles...”

“He’ll think I’m dumb for not knowing how to do anything,” you mumble. “Besides that’s not why.”

You shake your head and pause to start counting the list on your fingers. “Okay so he’s got muscles, a cute laugh, he likes video games, he literally always smells so fucking good, he has a great smile, he’s nice, and like he’s so mature for his age. I’m so surprised.”

“I mean from the few times I’ve seen him, I thought for sure he’d be a tool and a major shithead,” she admits.

“I know, but seriously don’t judge a book by its cover. He’s been so chill and respectful and has made me feel so welcome over the last few weeks. None of that fuckboy shit you’d expect to get with younger guys like, he doesn’t talk over me, no mansplaining, he looks me in the eyes and not at my tits, and listens when I say something, even if it’s just me talking about my day.” You pause, registering the words you just said. “Wow, the bar is really low, isn’t it?”

“Sad, but true.” She nods, glancing at the GPS on the dashboard. It’s says you’re nearly there, but it’s kind of further out from the city than you’d both been expecting.

She laughs, mulling over everything you’ve said. “He seems kinda shy. You probably need to make the first move. Maybe you should tell him you have a big fat crush on him. Tell him you wanna hold his hand. Do you think he’d blush? I bet he would. I bet he has a cute flustered face. You should totally do it.”

Recalling the way his ears turned red at the cafe causes you to purse your lips, but the action can’t hide the smile curling at the corners of your mouth. So you have a little crush on Jungkook. Who wouldn’t? He’s practically flawless and totally swoon-worthy. Your heart races as you imagine his reaction to your outfit. Would he be taken aback by how good you look as one of the hottest, most iconic female characters in gaming history? He’s a huge geek so you know there’s a possibility that he could appreciate it. Sweaty fingers work their way down your wig, carefully smoothing out any loose strands. You hope he does.

⊱ ────── {.⋅ ✯ ⋅.} ────── ⊰

Walking into Jimin’s place feels like entering a mansion. He told you that he lives with two other people from the same modeling agency, but you didn’t realize how big the place would be. Seokjin’s ability to gather this many decorations and display them with such attention to ambiance is certainly a feat worthy of praise. You find yourself lost in the orange and yellow lights that border each doorway and drape along the walls. Their soft glow is comforting as you walk down the dim hallway, exploring the house just enough to find the table filled with fruits and snacks.

Jungkook is nowhere to be seen and you find yourself breathing a sigh of relief as you sip punch out of a red plastic cup, filling a plate with an excessive amount of strawberries, peaches, and other sweet fruits. Contrary to your previous belief that admission would mean freedom from the thoughts swirling in your brain, uttering the words out loud has made you paranoid that everyone now knows about your secret crush. You’re hoping that drinking will remove the worry from your brain, so you do your best to down the liquid fast and refill your cup.

Jennie immediately hit it off with one of Jimin’s roommates moments after walking in. You’re envious because holy fuck that guy is tall and jacked, and he’s wearing a Captain America outfit. Jennie is about to make out with Captain America and you’re gulping down spiked punch from a little plastic cup. You appreciate being able to silently agree to split, but know that you have each other’s back if either of you were to suddenly express interest in leaving, even if Captain America is balls deep.

She’s an extrovert. She loves socializing. Tossing a strawberry into your mouth, you eye the table of snacks again. You don’t. You love food. Food or sex would be a tough toss-up for you depending on the menu, and in this situation food definitely wins. There’s a buffet table of appetizers looping around the room and into the kitchen. It doesn’t get much better than this, especially knowing it was catered by Seokjin’s restaurant.

You remove a glove and tuck it beneath your armpit as you stuff your face full of sweet treats and survey the amount of people on the dance-floor. There are a good amount of people here --some with ludicrous costumes-- and it makes you feel better about being able to blend in.

You had arrived fashionably late only because Jennie may have passed the house a few times, thinking this place couldn't possibly be it. A hand skates around the periphery of your vision and you frown as it attempts to surreptitiously claim a peach slice from your plate. Following the hand to its owner, you find a smile quickly claiming your mouth in place of the previous sour grimace.

"There's plenty of peaches left over there," you say, pointing to the table of snacks beside you.

"Mmm," Namjoon hums as he pockets the fruit in his cheek. "But this pile is better. I can deduce that you've already picked out the best pieces, Zelda."

You look him over from head to toe, examining the details of his tweed suit. You hate to admit he's looking dapper as fuck in this outfit. Despite often wearing three-piece suits to work, you rarely have time to stop and really appreciate just how flattering they are on his frame. Your eyes settle on the dark brown silk carefully knotted around his neck. "Don't you get sick of wearing ties?"

His eyes widen and he blinks at you as if you'd just told him that he sat in some gum. "Do you think I should have gone with the bow-tie? I spent hours weighing the pros and cons to both and which would be more quintessential to the whole ensemble. Did I make the wrong choice?"

You open your mouth to respond, meaning to allay his concerns and tell him that he looks fine, but he interrupts rather quickly. "You know what, don't say anything. I brought the bow-tie as a backup. It's upstairs in the guest bedroom. I'll go put it on."

You grab his arm just as he's about to leave, noting the plate full of chicken wings precariously balanced on one hand. "Namjoon. Chill. Your tie looks fine. I was only asking because I would strangle myself if I wore one all the time. Now gimme some of that chicken."

His eyes dart from you to the plate in his hand and his anxiety seems to visibly melt away, replaced with a soft smile. "I'm overthinking again, huh?"

The words have never come easier than they do now. "No shit, Sherlock."

At that he offers a laugh. "How about a trade? I share the wings for access to the princess's treasury of peaches."

"Deal," you agree with a smirk, wiggling your eyebrows up and down. "Wanna people-watch with me?"

He nods enthusiastically as he tosses a handful of fresh fruit directly from your plate into his mouth. "I was gonna wander aimlessly and socialize but this sounds way better."

"Glad we're on the same page," you murmur into the chicken wing at your lips, sucking the sauce off of it and scanning the room for any particular eye-catching costumes.

The flash of red, flowing satin catches your eye. Is someone wearing a bathrobe? Seriously? The taste of hot buffalo sauce causes your lips to tingle as you note the soft, fuzzy edges of the robe. It looks comfy, actually.

You elbow Namjoon in the ribs, directing his attention to the slender, black-haired figure gliding across the room. Namjoon opens his mouth as if to identify the stranger, but the flourish of the robe beats him to it. As the material spins, you catch a glimpse of tan skin peeking out from the chest, long legs exposed as he reaches for the sash at his waist.

The silk billows as it comes undone, cascading to the floor like a river of crimson. There's no mistaking it. You're now staring at the nearly nude, half-painted body of Kim Taehyung. You can't help the way you jaw drops open at the sight of so much skin being flaunted seemingly without a care in the world. Namjoon's hand flies up to cover your eyes, as if he's going to spare you the sight you've already taken in. Now that you've seen Taehyung in a thong, there's no going back.

Sauce-covered fingers pry his away from your eyes just in time to meet the piercing gaze of the man across the room. Is it mirth or anger that graces his features? It's hard to tell with a paintbrush trapped in the box his teeth make. He takes lazy strides across the room as you struggle to keep your eyes off the unforgiving fabric outlining every last curve of his dick. It's not until he's closer that you notice the thin belts crossing his hips, which appear to be holding six tubes of paint, three strapped to each side like gun-holsters. You have to admit they frame his crotch rather nicely.

It takes every ounce of willpower you possess to keep your eyes trained on his face. He carefully takes the paintbrush out from between his teeth and extends it to you. "Draw something pretty on me, Y/N. You too, Joon. Tonight I'm a human canvas on display for the universe."

Your eyebrow quirks as you exchange a look with Namjoon and set your plate down. "You know people are just going to draw a bunch of dicks on you, right?"

He scoffs, waving off your concerns. "Don't be so negative. I will have a beautiful mural by the end of the night. Mark my words."

"I think you're putting too much trust in the goodness of human nature," Namjoon comments, his lips pressing together in an attempt to hide the amused grin that is quickly spreading across his features.

Taehyung cocks his head to the side and leans forward with a lopsided grin. You're afraid he's about to get even closer and whisper some dirty secret into your ear. Instead he asks in a breathy, low tone, "Princess Zelda wouldn't draw such dirty things on me, would she?"

Twirling the thick handle of the paintbrush between your fingers, your eyes dip to the paints secured at his waist. His eyes chase the trail yours make down his side and his delight splits his mouth into a goofy grin. "Oh. Help yourself." He gestures to the colors available with a sweep of his hands just above his hips. "Feel free to use your fingers instead.” He pauses when your mouth falls open slightly. “You know, to paint... Just be careful what you grab, Princess," he jokes.

Removing your other glove with your teeth, you drape them over your shoulder and reach out for the tube of yellow paint, trying to hide the way your hand trembles. He looks down and smiles as the cold paint touches his skin. Before long you have the faint shape of 3 triangles at the center of his chest.

“How fitting,” he murmurs, offering an amused hum as you fill in the last triangle with a glob of yellow that threatens to run down his torso.

“Oops, sorry,” you apologize, moving to tap the brush against the excess, but he grabs your wrist before the bristles can make contact with his skin again.

“That’s alright. Let it do what it does. I like it like this,” he says, watching the clump of paint slowly slide down his midriff. “Besides I’m sure someone else can use it.”

“Like Sherlock!” you suggest, holding the paintbrush out for your companion.

Namjoon takes it begrudgingly and uses the excess yellow to draw a small smiley face beside the triforce symbol.

“Cute,” Taehyung laughs as he takes the paintbrush back from Namjoon. “I love it. Thanks guys.”

Just as he turns to find his next artist, a long object bars his path, pressing against his chest just above the collarbone. You follow the shape of the bar to its owner, revealing a grinning Hoseok clad in an officer’s uniform.

“That’s a bold choice Taehyungie,” he says, securing the faux nightstick into a loop at his waist. “Just make sure you keep that thing on…” He gestures to the small bit of material at Taehyung’s crotch and holds up a pair of handcuffs with his index finger before continuing, “or I’ll have to arrest you for indecent exposure.”

“Impersonating an officer is a crime, you know,” Namjoon says, even as he’s reaching out to touch the shiny metal. “Wait. Where did you get these? Are they real?”

You squint at the device in Namjoon’s hands, looking for the safety release latch like the cheap pair you bought to use with your ex. You don’t see it. That can only mean that these are the kind where losing the keys would have real consequences. But you’re not about to out yourself as the kinky freak you are, so you bring your nearly forgotten drink to your lips and guzzle what’s left in the cup.

As the empty plastic hits the table, your eyes happen to trail across the room and land on a crowd of people gathering around a very impressive, fully-lit Iron Man costume. Jimin seems to be soaking the attention up as the crowd grows ever larger. The massive room has begun to diminish in size, and it’s as though the once comforting lights are now wilting and closing in on you, threatening to strangle the air from your lungs. The adrenalin spiking your veins is telling you it’s time to seek the comfort of open space and solitude. Fast.

You duck beneath Namjoon and Hoseok’s arms, carefully sidestepping around Taehyung to avoid brushing against the wet paint on his skin. “I’m gonna get some air. Try not to get cuffed, Sherlock,” you manage to joke with a smile before turning on your heels and booking it from the room.

If anyone responds to your joke or even acknowledges your exit at all, it’s lost on your ears. Sweat beads on the back of your neck as you hastily attempt to make your way down the hall. If you can just get outside, you can breathe. You’ll be fine. You know it.

Warm bodies clutter the path to your freedom and you can’t help but feel more and more breathless by the never-ending apologies spewing from your mouth as you squeeze past each blockade. You don’t feel like yourself, even as you speak. Taking in sharp, greedy breaths like this isn’t helping. Why is this place so devoid of oxygen? Your body moves on autopilot, seeing the faces of the people you pass, but not feeling their eyes on you.

You float out of the front door, your head as light as a feather, but your eyelids feel like they’ve been anchored. You’re positive you’re about to gracefully glide down the front steps, legs becoming amorphous blobs beneath you that will surely allow you to fly. Just as you’re leaning into the momentum of gravity, two pairs of hands steady your shoulders and criss-cross around your midriff.

“Deep breaths,” Jennie’s voice briefly cuts through the ringing in your ears.

“Do you need to sit down?” The other voice spills into your eardrum as a rushed whisper, one that’s dripping with concern.

Huh? You work on steadying your breathing instead of trying to answer.

“What did she drink?” the familiar voice asks Jennie, the brief flicker of panic quashed by the evenness of his tone. “How much has she had?”

“Relax, Yoongi. Not even our lightweight champion gets drunk that fast,” Jennie reassures him as they help you seat yourself on the top step. “Are you familiar with panic attacks?”

Yoongi rubs the back of his neck and nods silently, backing up to give you some space.

“Jennie. I’m fine now. Thank you,” you mumble, shaking your head and regaining your sense of self. “I’m glad you have my back.”

“Of course. I saw you in the hall and I just knew.”

You jump when you meet the gaze of her white, eerie contacts, which causes both her and Yoongi to laugh. You look up at Yoongi. He shoves his hands into his pockets, long flowing shirt obscuring any flesh poking out from beneath it.

“Hey, you’re not dressed up,” you blurt, realizing he’s sporting a very goth, natural Yoongi look.

He scoffs before bending at the waist and baring his teeth. A single vampire fang is affixed to one of his canines.

You tilt your head like a dog hearing a strange noise. “What, only one fang?”

“Just as dangerous, princess,” he warns with a smirk, standing up straight.

You swear you see a wink, but then again maybe you’re imagining it. You have been known to exaggerate things in your head. Still your stomach somersaults and you focus your attention on Jennie. “I’m okay. I think I’m gonna chill out here for a bit. Get back in there and dance with… god what was his name? Jackson? Jae-beom?”

“Jin-young,” she corrects before biting her lip and glancing back towards the house.

“Go. Hottie McYoungie won’t wait forever,” you tease and point your thumb over at the man hovering above you. “Don’t worry. I’ll be fine with toothless over here.”

Yoongi rolls his eyes at the nickname but nods at Jennie. The answer seems to be satisfactory and she gifts you with a tight hug. “Text me if you need anything, okay?”

“Okay. Love you. Now go get laid.” You whisper to her before playfully pushing her back. Before you know it she’s scrambling up the steps and slips back inside, tattered dress swinging wildly with the sway of her hips, revealing just enough of her fishnet-clad thighs to draw Yoongi’s attention. There’s a fraction of a second where he wets his lips as he watches her go, but it’s gone in the blink of an eye. You don’t have time to tease because his dark eyes fall to you.

“Is there anything I can do?” His face is stoic but you can hear the sincerity in his tone.

“Wanna take a walk with me? I’d like to keep away from the big crowd.”

“I know the perfect place,” he says, hopping down from the steps and offering you his hand.

You take it with a smile and rise to your feet, carefully moving down the steps as you dust off your butt. The night air is a bit chilly and you start to work your gloves back up your arms to fight the goosebumps forming there.

That’s when you hear it. You want to misread the sound for a flute, recorder, oboe, or even someone’s radio, but you know those are all incorrect assumptions. It’s an ocarina: an ocarina playing a crude rendition of the opening to ‘Gas Pedal.’

Turning slowly, nothing can prepare you for the sight before you. Jungkook stands on the top step of the porch dressed in a green cap and tunic, tan leggings, and the ugliest dark brown boots you’ve ever seen in your life. He’s got the ocarina nestled between his lips, slowly descending each step with a roll of his hips that accentuates the definition of muscles behind the thin material hugging the shape of his legs.

Your eyes are wide, mouth falling open in surprise. “Jungkook?”

As he jumps down the last step he stops the tune and cups the ocarina in his hands, bowing slightly. “Princess.”

“What are you doing?” you ask, biting back the intimidated voice in your head that’s telling you you’re being picked on.

“What does it look like I’m doing?” he asks in a low tone, a crooked smile crossing his features as he takes a few tempered steps towards you.

You swallow. How are you supposed to answer that? You take a deep breath, trying to drive off the urge to run as he advances on you. Yoongi takes a few steps back and folds an arm over his torso, cupping his elbow as he brings a knuckle to rest against his mouth with intrigue. He couldn’t hold out for one more day? Should I step in? He brings his weight to the front of his foot, ready to diffuse the situation.

“It looks like you’re trying to fuck with me.” You stand your ground, clasping your gloved fingers and calmly resting them against your dress in true Zelda fashion.

Yoongi’s weight shifts back, retracting the step he had taken. A direct accusation isn’t exactly something he would have expected from you, but he finds himself pleased nonetheless. He certainly chose a difficult target this time.

Jungkook gets close enough that you can see the tick of his jaw and the part of his lips as he drags his eyes across your form, settling on the cleavage created by your corset. “Some of those words were right.” He pauses, leaning to whisper against the shell of your ear. “Can you guess which ones, Princess?”

Heat consumes your face as his posture straightens. He doesn’t budge past the space he’s already claimed as his, but he doesn’t move forward again to invade yours. He watches, basking in the full on show your face puts on for his own entertainment. First comes the confusion, next realization, and then shame.

It’s hard to tell if he’s coming onto you or picking on you. You swallow, throat growing drier by the second. “You knew I was coming as Zelda. Weren’t you coming as something else?”

He throws his head back enough to feign exasperation while keeping his eyes trained on you. “Come on. You don’t like my costume?”

Instead of giving you time to answer, he brings the ocarina back to his lips and blows an obnoxious amount of air through the hollow space inside, producing a piercing rendition of ‘Talk Dirty to Me.’

Your shoulders raise as you inhale, suppressing the irritation bubbling within your belly. You wince, turning your head as a particularly shrill note escapes the instrument. Yoongi’s expression sours as he plugs both ears with his fingers.

Jungkook immediately stops playing and offers a sheepish grin. “Oops. I learned that one for you. Maybe I need more practice. Do you want to help me?” He briefly pauses to wet his lips, presenting the ocarina to you. “I can show you how to blow.”

You grind your teeth as your jaw ticks back and forth a few times before answering, “No thanks.”

Yoongi silently tents his fingers over his forehead and tries to massage the secondhand embarrassment from his skull. This is a trainwreck waiting to explode and at this point there’s no looking away.

Jungkook raises his eyebrows at you as he stuffs the ocarina into a small brown pouch hanging from the flimsy belt at his waist. “Ah. Sorry, Princess. I don’t mean to insult you. You’ve probably already mastered the art. Hah. Maybe you could show me a thing or two?”

Unable to form a proper response, your lips purse as the wheels in your head spin. Say something clever. Think of a comeback. Something. Come on. But here you stand, mind blanking for even the simplest of clapbacks. You’re having trouble coming to terms with the fact that your innocent little crush on the once “sweet” Kookie has come crumbling down with his facade, leaving your chest aching with the humiliation of your naivety.

He looks you over, admiring the artistry in the gown you’ve lovingly crafted. For a moment he’s lost in the embroidery stitched into the sash swaying in the breeze of a chilly October night. “I love your…” he trails off, eyes darting across your shape to capture every last detail of your attire.

He pays special mind to the gems adorned at your hips, and the heavy-looking chain belt which links the sash to your dress. He marvels over the color and velvet texture chosen for the purple corset at your torso. The sheer attention to detail and craftsmanship in your costume stuns him into silence for half a second.

His eyes reach the perky mounds of flesh peeking over the top of the corset. Miraculously his voice resurfaces. “...costume.”

The way his dark eyes linger on your chest isn’t lost on you. Your cheeks burn in the cool air, despite the goosebumps littering your arms. You cross your arms over your chest, higher than you normally would to combat his lurid gaze. The green hat atop his head folds over itself as he cocks to one side. Dark, hungry eyes snap to yours, voicelessly pouting at your blockade. For a split second a guilty excitement pulses through you, but you’ll be damned if you’re the cause of an obviously already inflated ego.

“You never said what you think of mine,” he prods. His eyebrows wiggle up and down as he slowly runs his hands along his torso, as if feeling himself up is going to sway your opinion.

You tell yourself not to fall for it, that he’s playing you for a fool right now. Still, your jaw is tight as your eyes helplessly follow the flow of his fingers down his body. His pinky purposefully catches on the flimsy pleather strap acting as the belt at his waist. An impish grin spreads across his face as he notes the way your chest stutters out the breath you’d unknowingly held. Satisfied, his hands continue their languid journey down his body. Your eyes are glued to the way he traces the contours of his thighs.

Finally his fingers dig into the meat of his those muscles and you feel the need to look away before answering. “I hate it.”

He sighs. “Hate is a strong word. Are you sure that’s how you really feel? Why don’t you look at me when you say that?”

Strengthening your resolve, you force your eyes back to his smug face. Stupid doesn’t even begin to cover how you’re feeling at this point. Biting back tears, you swallow hard and do your best to remain composed. Here he stands, a crooked smile amplifying the air of arrogance surrounding him. He’s playing you. He’s been playing you this whole time hasn’t he?

“I don’t even know who you really are, do I?” your voice cracks, only adding to your humiliation.

“I’m the bad guy. Duh.” With that he cackles as he pulls the ocarina from his pouch, proceeding to play the melody from ‘Bad Guy.’

You spin on your heels and storm past Yoongi, the blood rushing through your ears in a distraught rage, drowning out the bitter sound of the notes. A pang of guilt strikes the half-assed vampire as he stares at his friend. “One more day. You couldn’t make one more day?”

Jungkook shrugs, making his way back up the stairs. “If you see Hobi, tell him I’ll have his money tomorrow.”

⊱ ────── {.⋅ ✯ ⋅.} ────── ⊰

Dragging your hands across your face, you keep your gaze cast towards the ground.

How fucking idiotic, how self-absorbed have you been to assume that he’s been nice because he likes you and not because he was playing some game with you? He's probably just been waiting for an opportunity like this and you fell right into his trap. Stupid. Stupid. Stupid.

A hand clamps down on your shoulder and you spin, ready to deck the person you assume to be Jungkook. Yoongi's eyebrows raise as you stand poised to punch. He ducks to the side just in time. As you realize your mistake, it's too late. The momentum brings you forward.

His arms come up around you in a soft embrace, one that you're quick to return. "It's just me," he mumbles, kneading his thumb against your back. "...Sorry."

You bury your face into his shoulder, allowing the tiara to slip from your head and hit the soft ground with a dull thud. Why is he apologizing? He didn't do anything wrong. You want to tell him that, but any sound you make might bring about a slew of tears you've been holding back. Instead you just squeeze your arms around him even tighter.

He awkwardly pats your back a few times, not quite knowing what to do with the hug that's lasting longer than anticipated. Sensing his discomfort, you pull away and adjust your wig as you offer an apologetic smile. "I'm sorry."

A figure approaches, bending down to pick up the forgotten adornment. Out of the corner of your eye you see him rub the dirt off the tiara. Jin carefully places it on your head. "A princess should have a crown."

You look him over, noting the giant overalls, red newsboy cap and hideous fake mustache. You can't help but laugh as he forces a hard blink and puckers his lips, alternating lifting sides of his mouth so the mustache comically tweaks itself in a seesaw motion. "I like your costume," you manage between giggles.

He grins back, donning an over-the-top Italian accent. "I a-like-a yours too! A beautiful costume for a beautiful a-woman."

"Please stop," Yoongi groans.

Jin ignores him, fiddling with the corner of his mustache. "I don't-a know where my brother went. I think he's a-scared of the haunted mansion."

You roll your eyes at the joke. That's right. Jungkook was supposed to be Luigi. "He's busy playing a dick for the night."

A look of realization washes over him and he nods, puffing out air through overly inflated cheeks. "Hmm. You know what might-a make you feel better? Helping me scare-a the pants off of people!"

He folds his elbow and holds it out for you, tempting you to lace yours around it. Channeling your bruised ego and hurt feelings into scaring people for fun? That might just work. You feed your elbow through the crook in his. "Zelda and Mario working together."

Jin laughs. "The dream-a team!" He makes a motion to skip towards the outer entrance to the basement that he's dressed up with spiderwebs and a large, hand-made sign that says "MARIO'S GHOST HOUSE." Beside the entrance is a giant blown-up decoration of King Boo, its pink tongue flapping in the breeze.

As you're tugged in the direction of his creation, he stops abruptly. "Oh, we haven't had that many people though. So we have to make the few that come through count!"

Yoongi's eyes light up. "Hey. I’ve got an idea. I’ll get you a the best customer. But you have to really scare him. I promise it will make your night."

Puzzled, you furrow your brows and tilt your head. “Okay…?”

Jin grins like a maniac as Yoongi makes his way towards the front of the house. “Come on. I’ll show you the best spots to hide.”

⊱ ────── {.⋅ ✯ ⋅.} ────── ⊰

About twenty minutes have passed since Yoongi left in search of his promised customer. Only a few people have wandered in. You have to admit it’s therapeutic to watch people scream and jump when you bang on the false walls within the maze Jin has somehow constructed in this basement. Watching people run up the final stairs to safety leaves you with a feeling of satisfaction, always giving Jin a prideful high-five before returning to the beginning to await more guests.

“Ah! My-a new-a guests!” you hear Jin enthusiastically greet the latest people to stop at the entrance. “Are you a-ready to have fun?”

There’s some hushed whispering that you can’t quite make out from your hiding place within the set.

“Don’t be such a pussy,” Yoongi chides loudly. “Seokjin made this. Do you really think it’s that scary?”

“P-Pussy?” Hoseok stares wide-eyed at his friend and scoffs. “Don’t be rude. I just know Seokjin. It will be worse than whatever I think”

Is that Hobi? You were kind of hoping Yoongi would get Jungkook to walk through. Knowing what you do now though, you have no doubt that Jungkook would be unphased by something like this. All you can hear in your head is the echo of his obnoxious laughter and a pang of hurt slices through your heart. God, you’re so stupid.

Yoongi points to the Boo’s tongue flapping in the wind. “It will be like that, probably. It’s silly to be so afraid.”

Hoseok bounces from foot to foot in uncertainty. Even a police uniform can’t steel his spine or guarantee safety. “Why should I do this to myself?”

Yoongi sighs. “I’ll help you look at new places and… help you move. I’ll even be your roommate if the rent is too high.”

Hoseok is beaming. How long has he been asking for help searching? Jin looks from one man to the other, hiding the subtle smile beneath his mustache. He knew Hoseok wouldn’t go in so easily, that something had to be offered up, but he really didn’t expect Yoongi to go so far.

Hoseok points at Jin. “You’re my witness. I go through this and he’s my roommate.”

“If the rent is too high only,” Yoongi tries to reason, but it’s too late. Hoseok has heard what he wants to hear. He grabs his friend and marches into the depths of the basement.

Immediately you bang the walls on their journey down, feeling Jin rush past you to set up for the next scare. Hobi screams. “Never mind! Never mind!”

Yoongi scoffs, dragging his friend forward. “Come on, officer.”

You listen for their footsteps as you circle the walls behind the maze. Hobi’s frantic yelling breaks through the room, slipping into loud curses. You pull your glove up and wait, peeking through the hole you’re hoping he’ll get close enough to. Even shrouded in shadows, Yoongi’s form peeks out from around the corner.

“Don’t think about the dark,” Yoongi says, slowly shuffling towards the wall with Hoseok crouched behind him, using him as a shield from any more scares. “Think about how you bet Jungkook he couldn’t stop himself from trying to get in Y/N’s pants, not even for one month.”

You freeze. Yoongi knows you can hear him, right? He has to know.

“Think about how well he was doing. You would have been cleaning his house tomorrow. Maid Hobi, bound by servitude.”

“I know…” Hoseok groans. “It would have been awful. He’s so messy! I wouldn’t even be getting paid! What was I thinking?”

“But instead, he bet you a month’s rent that he could,” Yoongi continues loudly. “He blew it tonight for the chance to dress up as Link and tease Zelda. He only had one more day.”

“He’s a dumbass,” Hobi comments with a nod, turning to look at the ceiling and making sure nothing is going to drop down on him.

You swallow, taking in the revelation Yoongi has just bestowed upon you. All this time you had spent thinking Jungkook was a sweet gentleman was actually due to Hoseok making a bet with him? You would rather have known Jungkook was a dick straight up because now the innocent, harmless crush you have on him feels so dirty and foul that you wish you could swipe it from existence.

It’s Jungkook’s fault. He lied. He pretended. You know this. But still you can’t help but partially blame Hobi for the bitter taste in your mouth. As Yoongi passes, you reach out, letting your fingers swipe down Hobi’s forearm and retract through the hole in the wall as he lets out a high-pitched scream.

“Hoseok, get off.” Yoongi tries to push away the man climbing onto his back.

“Something grabbed me! Something grabbed me!” Hoseok wraps his legs around Yoongi’s waist and huddles close to his neck pointing. “Over there! It grabbed me from over there!”

“Let’s keep moving, then.”

“No! No more! I’m standing right here until the sun comes up.”

“How is it standing if your feet aren’t touching the ground? I won’t carry you all night,” Yoongi says, adjusting his stance to compensate for the weight on his back.

“You will, too,” he pouts.

Jin helps you position a furry spider decoration above them, slowly dangling it lower until it finally hits Hoseok’s shoulder. The wail that escapes this grown ass man almost makes you feel bad. Almost. He swats the creature into darkness as he spurs Yoongi on by digging his heels into his belly. “Get me out of here! Please!”

Jin’s shoulders move up and down with the sound of his laughter as he slaps your hand in victory. Scaring Hobi made you feel a little better at least.

⊱ ────── {.⋅ ✯ ⋅.} ────── ⊰

The party has died down quite a bit and at this point Jimin has been passing you far too many drinks as he and Namjoon regale you with tales from college. Namjoon is clearly feeling toasty, laughing like a dork at every memory Jimin brings up. Apparently they were roommates and Jimin has a liberal arts degree from four years of being undecided.

Your head lolls around to rest on Namjoon’s shoulder, your backs pressed against the bottom of the couch as Jimin sits cross-legged in sweats and a t-shirt on the floor before you, his costume laying discarded beside him. He’s spinning his latest story of how Namjoon had accidentally thrown up on some girl he really liked. Yoongi silently lays on the couch behind you, smirking with his eyes closed. You can’t tell if he’s sleeping or just relaxing as you struggle to stand, using Namjoon’s shoulder as leverage to prop yourself up.

“Bathroom?” you ask distractedly, searching the room like a door will appear if you look hard enough.

Jimin smiles pointing at the doorway across the room. “Go out that door, take a left down the hall. It’ll be on your right.”

Your head dips a bit as you try to take in the directions. Namjoon looks up at you as you stumble forward, clearly off-balance. “Do you need some help, geeksquad?”

“I’m fine,” you mumble, hating the nickname he’s given you from work. “I’ll be right back. Don’t drink my drink.” You narrow your eyes at Jimin and he blinks at you in surprise, like you’ve accused him of such a heinous, unthinkable crime.

Rounding the corner, you pass a grinning Taehyung being led upstairs by a cute girl in a red beret, black and white striped shirt, and miniskirt with suspenders. Art hoe? Mime? It’s hard to tell what her costume might be. While his skin is covered in a beautiful mess of colors, your tri-force symbol still stands untouched at the center of his chest. You smile as you watch him climb the steps, clearly distracted. But as his back is revealed, your eyes widen at the sight of a mural of painted dicks. Well. At least he can’t see them.

You walk down the hall for what feels like an eternity, passing a few closed doors on either side. Maybe you should try one? Knocking on the one closest to you once, the door swings in and you lose your balance, not expecting it to open.

“What took you so long? I almost came without you.” The voice is pouty and low, somewhat familiar. He gasps when he realizes you’re not the person he’s been waiting for.

You stumble forward, falling to your knees and catching the bed frame before your face smacks into the wood. As graceful as you can manage, you pull yourself up. “Sorry! I didn’t mean to! I didn’t realize it was open and I was just looking for the---” The will to speak leaves you as soon as you see him.

A very sweaty, very naked Jungkook crosses his arms and he leans back expectantly, smushing the pillows behind him into the headboard. Your eyes take in the pleased expression on his face, quickly scanning the muscles of his folded arms, his chiseled abs, his bulging legs. The pointy green hat he had been wearing earlier tents across his sculpted hips and pelvis, thankfully obscuring any shape hidden beneath it.

“I didn’t think I’d see you again tonight,” he says, licking his lips as he watches your form tremble, practically falling apart in front of him before adding, “...Princess.”

A devilish grin overtakes him at the sight of you spinning around a little too fast, staggering towards the door and holding onto the frame for dear life. “I hoped I wouldn’t see you again tonight.”

“I can’t say it isn’t a nice surprise. You don’t have to leave,” he coaxes. “Do you wanna see my Master Sword?”

“Grow up!” You make sure to slam the door shut behind you. You hate him so fucking much it hurts.

⊱ ────── {.⋅ ✯ ⋅.} ────── ⊰

“Jennie, how could I be so wrong about him?” you sigh, dropping your forehead against the kitchen table. It’s been three weeks since you’ve talked to him, but it’s still the only thing you can think about.

Jennie takes a sip from her beer. “Sweetie, you’re not good at reading liars. Maybe you should look at some dating apps. You could get good read quick.”

“But I don’t wanna,” you whine into the coated wood. “Why can’t people just be nice?”

“Because. People suck. Come on, Y/N. Jungkook ain’t worth the headache. Drink with me. I’ll show you how Tinder works. It’s not so bad.”

When you don’t say anything, she tugs your chair across the floor, dragging your form close to hers and setting her phone down on the table. You peek out at the screen as you raise your head and rest it on a lazy elbow.

“Swipe right on the hotties. Swipe left on the fuckboys and losers. Jungkook? He’s a swipe left. But look at all these good ones on here. These are all swipe righties.”

You nod as she goes through a few profiles and begin downloading the app on your phone. Maybe she’s onto something.

[that-sarcastic-writer]

Once upon a time in NYU- MGG AU

Fandom: MGG, Criminal Minds

Pairing: College!Matthew X College!Reader

Summary: you couldn't stand Matthew, and he couldn't stand you. But you couldn't say the same when you were in his bed

Warnings: alternative universe, enemies to lovers relationship, cursing duh, hair pulling, fingering, penetrative sex, unprotected sex, bad writing basically

WC: 6.1k 

A/N: so I saw I think it was @eideticmemory​ write an enemies to lovers college fic and like a light just went on in my head, and I really wanted to that because I've always wanted to, but also give it my own twist and touch of course, so I guess this my attempt at writing a multi-chapter Matthew fic. Will I succeed? Probably not. But it's a good excuse to write smut after a year so we'll see. ALSO HUGE TW I understand posting this now might be a bit of a bad timing. So if you think that reading this will trigger you in any way, just go ahead and skip this one. I dont want to trigger anyone in any way, I just want to entertain you guys and myself in the process so yeah, read at your own risk and please please stay safe. And this is going to be a bit long so strap in yall and enjoy the poorly written sin. 

Andddd huge huge thanks to my friend Kara (idk if shes reading this but yeah) for helping me edit this, she helped me make this so much better for you guys and she literally so amazing for actually spending the time to help me. So yeah, 

You know when something bad happens, you’re always told to see the bright side of things? That maybe that unfortunate event isn’t as bad as you feel it is? Yeah, well, that doesn’t always apply, and it certainly didn’t when I found out I was partnered with the one person I was hoping I wouldn’t get paired with for my end of the semester film project. 

Seriously, out of the nearly hundred students that were enrolled in my film class, I had to get paired up with him, him out of all people, literally the one person I was praying wouldn't get paired up with. Not only because I was forced to work with someone, because honestly all I wanted was to work alone, I had to get paired with Matthew fucking Gubler.

You know when people say God has his favourites? Yeah, well I certainly wasn't one of them.

Now, I didn’t necessarily hate Matthew Gubler. I didn't hate him for no reason, I didn't just wake up one day and decided I was just going to hate Matthew. There was a time where I actually liked him, I liked him more than I'd like to admit, deep down I still did. And I knew he liked me too, he did then at least. And we were good together, it was fun, we had a fun first couple of dates. To this day, they were the nicest dates I ever had, because he knew just how to make them special. I mean, when a guy takes you to the Neue Galerie here in New York and have nice long walk through Central Park, a walk filled with laughter and bliss, it has to be special, and in a weird way, he was special too. 

And as much as I wanted more than just two or three dates, I would've been perfectly fine if he had told me what he wanted from the start. If he had suddenly changed his mind about me, I would've accepted it, and I would've been able to live a happy life as his friend if that's what he wanted.

But he didn't, and instead I found out he had other interests. And I didn't hear it from him, I heard it from my friend. She didn't even need to tell me who it was, because the minute she told me where he took her, I knew. He took her to the same place he took me not even two weeks later and then acted like I was nothing the next time he saw me. And my god did that fucking hurt. It hurt me in a way I had never been hurt before, because I thought he was different, I was hoping he was. And convincing myself that I hated him was much easier than facing the fact that it hurt. And I never addressed it ever again, not that Matthew cared enough to actually talk about us, or, whatever we were. So instead we just made each other's existence miserable.

No, what I felt for Matthew wasn't hate, it was just the strong need to stay ten feet away from him so I wouldn't shove a five foot pole up his ass. That's how I felt about Matthew Gubler.

And now, here I was, aggressively shoving my laptop and notebook into my bag so I could leave the auditorium as quickly as possible, or at least quick enough to avoid Matthew, because knowing how he was, he would come straight to me to rub our partnership in my face. And I was right, because the minute we were dismissed, I spotted his lanky frame starting to come down from the top rows where he usually sat, and he was headed my way.

Screaming a big nope in my head, I strapped my bag over my shoulder and headed straight for the exit. I knew I couldn't avoid him forever, especially now but, I just needed a minute to mentally prepare myself to deal with him, a minute and probably a bottle of booze. But I didn't get either because the minute I was out those doors, I heard the unmistakable sound of his voice calling my name. 

Great.

"Y/N! Y/N wait!" I heard Matthew call out, followed my rushed footsteps coming from behind me.

"Hey, partner, I'm glad I caught you before you left. You weren't trying to run away from me were you?" He teased, throwing one of his particularly long arms over my shoulder.

If I had rolled my eyes any harder they probably would've gotten stuck there. I groaned, grabbing a hold of his arm and unwrapping it not so subtly before dropping it beside him, "first of all, I'd really appreciate it if you didn't touch me,  and second of all, just please go away, Matthew. I have a class I have to get to." I muttered, walking slightly faster and keeping my gaze forward, refusing to even look at him.

If there was something I've learned about Matthew in the two long years I've known him is that he usually goes away on his own if I don't give him the attention he wanted. I was hoping this was one of those times, because I was not in the mood to deal with him right now.

But alas, he didn't, he walked faster, staying beside me the whole time. "But I wasn't even doing anything. I was just saying hi." He defended, and I could just hear the smile on his face even when I wasn't even looking at him. 

I rolled my eyes harder, letting out a small breath through my lips, "what do you want Matthew?"

"When can we meet up? I already have an idea for our project and I think you're going to love it."

I chuckled sarcastically, finding his words actually hilarious, "If you came up with it I seriously doubt it." I sighed heavily, digging my teeth into my bottom lip before speaking, "tonight after I finish my shift, I guess. The quicker we can start, the quicker we can get it over with, soo..."

"Great. It's a date then, see you tonight, sweetheart." He hummed, ghosting his lips over my ear, his lips smacking loudly as he pretended to kiss it before he quickly took off in the other direction before I could even say anything.

This fucking guy.

~~~~~~~~~~

"I seriously do not understand how you fucking dated this guy, he's so obnoxious and annoying, how could anyone want to date someone like that." I complained to my friend and roommate Liz. I met her for a quick lunch break before my afternoon class and I just had to let her know how unhappy I was about my partnership with Matthew. She was amused to say the least.

"You make it sound like we dated for years, we dated for a few months, but he's not even that bad." she argued.

I rolled my eyes, crossing my arms over my chest and leaned back into my seat with an unamused expression, just waiting for Liz to bury herself further up Matthew's ass. I always had the feeling she still had feelings for him, as much as she insisted it was just a meaningless relationship. And as much as they were just friends now, I just knew she wanted more with him. But it wasn't really my place to question that, not that it mattered to me anyway.

"He's a pretty cool and fun guy to be around, you just never gave him a chance. You've hated him ever since you met him for absolutely no reason, you never gave yourself the chance to get to know him better." Liz insisted, she always did. She always insisted Matthew was such a great guy I never gave the change to get to know. 

I had let out a heavy sigh in annoyance of her defense of Matthew before responding, "yeah well, it doesn't really matter since I'm being forced to anyway. And he's coming over tonight to start our project. Can't fucking wait."

I could've sworn I saw Liz's expression change into a mixture of surprise and something I could've easily confused with jealousy. She pursed her lips together and her eyes darted everywhere, like she was avoiding making any kind of eye contact with me.

But, it couldn't be jealousy? What even is there to be jealous of? Her and the whole world knew how I felt about Matthew, her out of all people knew it better than anyone.

"Oh, he is? Well, I'm not really going to be home tonight, I would've given you company so it wouldn't be so awkward with him." She frowned, she sounded disappointed, angry even. She looked uncomfortable, like she was deeply bothered by something, by something I said.

It was weird, I wasn't exactly sure what to say, I wasn't really sure why my news seemed to bother her as much as it did. It's not like I was going to sleep with Matthew while she was away or something. It didn't really matter though, I didn't have time to answer. Thank God.

"I'm sorry Liz but I have to go, I have class in like ten minutes." I excused myself, eating whatever was left on my plate in a matter of seconds before I stood up from my seat and gathered my belongings, "I'll see you later and wish me luck." I said quickly before taking off, not giving her the chance to respond.

~~~~~~~~~~

Usually, I pray for shifts to be over as soon as possible, for it to be slow so I can go home early. Today though, today I prayed for just the opposite. I was hoping the end of my shift wouldn't come, and when it did, that it would be too late and I would be able to cancel my meet up with Matthew.

But like I said, I wasn't one of God's favourites. And today out of all days, it was the slowest it has ever been and my shift ended rather quickly, quicker than I had hoped.

Groaning loudly at the evening that awaited me, I walked down the long halls of my floor, standing outside of my dorm room, dreading my evening already.

Figuring I should just get it over with, I went to get the key on the lock of my door, but noticed it was already unlocked. Liz probably forgot to lock the door, again. I rolled my eyes, shaking my head at my stupid roommate before turning the knob, opening the door. And my jaw dropped the minute I stepped into the room, not believing what my eyes saw.

You've got to be fucking kidding me.

"Matthew, what the fuck are you doing in my dorm and in my bed!? How did you even get in here?" I nearly screamed at the tall brunette that was carelessly laying on my bed with what I figured was one of my books in his hand.

Matthew turned his head towards me, a carefree and calm look plastered all over his face before his eyes went back to the pages in front of him., "oh, well, Liz let me in before she went to work. I hope you don't mind." He responded nonchalantly, continuing to flick through the pages of the book he had in his hand.

I stared at him with absolute disbelief and a loud scoff left my lips as I slightly pitched the bridge of my nose, trying not to throw the nearest object at his face, "yes, I do mind, in fact. You can't just come into somebody's dorm, lie on their bed and go through their stuff. Seriously dude, what is wrong with you?"

I just couldn't believe this guy. He just knew how to get on my nerves without even doing anything. 

Matthew, of course, couldn't have cared any less about whatever I was saying. And it wasn't that he wasn't listening, because he was, he had that stupid smile on his face that proved he was in fact listening to every word I was saying. He just didn't care, or he did, but he just liked getting on my nerves. He loved pushing every single one of my buttons until I snapped. And I had no idea why. I had no idea why he liked annoying me so much.

I exhaled heavily through my nose, closing my eyes slightly as I ran a hand through my hair exasperatedly, "I just can't fucking deal with you. I can't." I huffed, dropping my bag from my shoulder and walked to the opposite side of my room, facing away from him, not even wanting to look at his face.

"Tell me something, sweetheart," Matthew spoke, curiosity and a slight bit of amusement lingering on his words.

"What."

"Why do you hate me so much? You've hated me ever since I dated Liz back in our first year of college and I never truly understood why," he questioned with genuine curiosity, but there was also a certain playfulness in his voice. I opened my mouth to answer, still not facing him, and I was so ready to tell him off, god knows I've been wanting to but he cut me off. "Is it because I never slept with you?"

My eyes instantly widened at his words, a clearly offended scoff leaving my lips as I turned around to face him, "what? No, of course not, I—" my words got caught in my throat when I saw his tall frame towering over me, my eyes getting stuck on his chest before they traveled up to his face, and he was close. Extremely close. I swallowed thickly, feeling slightly cornered by his significantly taller frame so I stepped back, trying to create some kind of distance between us, but he simply followed me. "I, uhm, that's not why I don't like you, Matthew. I don't like you because you're an insensitive asshole and—"

"Oh, I know why you hate me," he cut me off again, slowly running his tongue to wet his perfectly pink lips. "You hate me because I dated Liz and not you."

His proclamation made my eyes grow even wider and my mouth hung open as I stammered for words. I wanted to disagree, I truly wanted to tell him that he was wrong. But honestly, he wasn't altogether wrong. I couldn't say some of my resentment didn't come from a deep rooted feeling of rejection. Because while most of that resentment came from that place of genuine hurt, my resentment was fueled by frustration and a shameless sense of envy.

But it was just easier to convince myself that I hated him than to admit that I still liked him and that it hurt me that he chose my friend over me.

But of course, I would never admit to that, especially not to him.

Avoiding eye contact, I looked down and shook my head, running my tongue to wet my suddenly dry lips, "of-of course not. Why—why would I care about your dating life? You can fuck whoever you want, I don't care." I wish I sounded more confident when I said that. But my stuttering words and my unsteady legs gave him exactly what he wanted.

And the bastard actually chuckled. He fucking chuckled.

"But you do, you do care. You care because you haven't stopped thinking about us and me since our first year." He grinned, digging his teeth into his perfect lips as he brought a hand to cup my face, lifting it so I had no other choice but to look at him.

And I was fucking gone.

It was like, all of that anger, frustration and hatred just vanished and instead turned into longing want. Want for him to just take me and do whatever he pleases with me. I was practically nothing in his hands, and I was nothing waiting for him to make me something. Waiting for him to make me his.

And that absolutely delighted the bastard. He found amusement in having the power I never allowed him to have. But right now, I just couldn't fight it.

I always knew that if I ever found myself alone and in this situation with Matthew Gubler, I would lose, no matter how much I tried to convince myself otherwise.

And he knew that too.

"That's it, isn't? You want me to fuck you like I fucked your friend." He smirked, almost like he was proud to say it. And he stared, his usually soft amber eyes now brown and darkened with want.

Who the fuck was this guy and where did Matthew go? Matthew Gubler was the most awkward and disgraceful guy when it came to women. The poor guy couldn't even flirt his way out of a wet paper bag. And yet, somehow, here he was, with this new found confidence and the ability to turn me into a shaking and stuttering mess. Who fucking knew.

Once again, I stammered for words, I truly wanted to tell him otherwise. I wanted to scream in his face and push him away, but I couldn't. Not that I wanted to.

He took my lack of response as the answer he was looking for and brought his other hand to my waist, backing me up against the nearest wall, caging me between the hard surface behind me and his body, which right now, seemed so much bigger than mine.

My breathing instantly skyrocketed as I felt the same hand that was on my waist sneak its way past the ends of my dress and up my bare thighs, ones that shook like an earthquake as the pads of his fingers slowly rubbed the tense skin. Like he was testing the waters. Testing how well my body reacted to his touch.

And it wasn't subtle. At all.

"W-what—what are you doing?" I almost squealed, my voice practically betraying me.

"Oh? Well, I'm just giving you what you wanted. I'm giving you what you've been wanting for years." He stated so casually, like he had no idea what he was doing to me. And just as casually, he slowly ran a finger over the thin cotton fabric of my underwear, touching me, but definitely not in the way I needed to be touched.

I wished my body didn't betray me like it did though. I couldn't even hold back the breathy moan that escaped my lips when his fingers made contact with the thin material. But Matthew certainly loved the response I gave him.

"Because this is what you've been wanting, isn't it? You've been thinking about how my fingers would feel buried inside your little cunt. Or how good you would feel around my cock." He taunted, it was almost cynical just how easily those filthy words rolled off his usually reserved tongue. "I'm not gonna lie, I've thought about it too, you have no idea how many times I've thought about having your filthy mouth wrapped around me. Or how pretty you would look begging me for more." 

I opened my mouth to speak but my words instantly got caught in my throat when the sneaky bastard pulled the fabric to the side and dipped his fingers into the soaking mess that was my core.

And if there were any rational thoughts still hanging in my head, all of those just went straight out the window when another moan erupted from my throat and my head fell back into the wall behind me.

"See just how much easier things are when you just shut the fuck up and stop fighting so much?" He almost whispered, his lips ghosting over the skin on my neck as a lithe finger gathered my wetness and spread it over my clit.

Despite being a complete whimpering mess at that point, I managed to spit out a surprisingly harsh, "fuck you." 

It was a pretty convincing retort. One that didn't exactly have the effect I hoped for though.

I could feel him smirk into my neck as his lips left wet and sloppy kisses into the skin before he pulled back, just so he could see the look of utter want and frustration on my face.

"Hm, sorry sweetheart, I can't do that. I'm too busy trying to fuck you instead."

I swear to god, he was the biggest asshole I have ever met in my entire fucking life. But he was an asshole who immediately slipped two of his sinfully long fingers into my dripping core. I instantly choked on my own breath as he began working his fingers around the muscles, stroking the digits inside me at an agonizingly slow pace.

"Because that's what you want don't you sweetheart? You want to me to fuck you into that mattress until you can't keep your eyes open?" He continued, his filthy words making me pant like I ran for fucking miles. "I do too, trust me I do. And I will, I promise. But I want to make up for all of the lost time. Don't you?"

I wasn't even paying attention to whatever filthy proclamations were coming out of Matthew's mouth, with my eyes nearly closed, my mouth slightly open and my mind only focusing on his fingers working diligently inside me, how could I?

But Matthew was expecting an answer this time. Because I could feel his darkened eyes glare into my face and his fingers immediately stilled inside me. Earning a loud whine from me.

"I asked you a question, answer me."

It took me a minute to remember his question before I quickly nodded, "yes! Yes! Is that what you wanted to hear?" I nearly screamed at his face, my hands coming to clutch his shirt, needing something to relieve some tension.

"I want to hear you say it. Say it, tell me you want me." He demanded, his eyes locking with mine as he waited for what he wanted to hear.

He wanted me to beg, he wanted me to give up that control I never allowed him to have. And was I going to?

Absolutely.

I needed to.

"I want you, Matthew, I want you to take me and fuck me into that mattress until I can't walk straight. Please."

I guess that was the answer Matthew had been looking for because his fingers immediately began to work diligently inside me again, stroking the digits until he had me whimpering and begging for release.

It wasn't long before my head started to spin and stars began to blur my vision. Words were no longer an option at that point, nothing would come out, not even Matthew's name. All I could manage to let out were pathetic, strangled moans. But he could tell I was close, or I figured that much because his fingers only worked faster around my tightening walls, determined to finish me.

"C'mon sweetheart, come for me." he encouraged through gritted teeth as his fingers were anything but still inside me and his palm applied a crushing pressure into my front. And even when my eyes were half closed and my mind had turned into dust, I could see the look of utter determination on his face, his eyebrows were furrowed as his teeth dug into his perfectly plump lips. It was like his only focus was on driving me over the edge. And he succeeded.

The second his fingers curled, I was fucking gone. My orgasm hit me like a tidal wave. My eyes rolled into the back of my head as I cried out his name like a praise, my body nearly spasming against the wall. But his fingers didn't stop until my whole body shook to the point where my legs no longer supported my weight and I practically slid into the wall as I tried to catch my breath.

It was almost dizzying just how quickly Matthew withdrew his fingers from me and hoisted me up on his slim torso. He wasted absolutely no time in striding over to my bed across the room. My whole body collided with my bed so quickly and forcefully it knocked the air out of my chest.

Matthew was practically ripping away his clothes before I could even sit up or catch my breath. Like he had this urgency to do what I've been avoiding for the past two years. Like he needed to do it, right now, like something would happen before he got the chance to.

"Matthew—"

"Shut up, I've heard enough shit from you for the past two years, and I'm fucking tired of it." He almost growled, his usually soft voice coming out so low and dark it actually stroked fear in my heart. It was scary just how quickly his demeanor changed.

Matthew didn't really waste much time in discarding his clothes, he was down to only his boxers and was on top of me before I could even blink. He brought a hand to my chest and he pushed me down until my back was flat on the bed, but his hand stayed there, pinning me there as he hovered over me, trapping my significantly smaller body under his own.

He wasted no time in grabbing a hold of my dress and pulling it over my head. And I could've sworn I saw pure awe and infatuation flash through his eyes as they shamelessly eyed over my newly exposed skin. Come to think of it though, this was the first time I was this naked in front of him, and even then, I wasn't fully naked. Not yet anyway.

After a good minute, his eyes flickered back up to meet with mine, his previous look of awe quickly replaced by this feral look of want and pure desire. And I couldn't say it didn't excite me to see it.

He brought a hand to my face, running his smooth fingers over my face with a surprising amount of delicacy before he deep rooted them into my hair and slightly tilted my head back before he brought his face into mine, our lips crashing into a deep fervent kiss. I didn't realize we have never actually kissed. No wonder there was so much desperation and hunger within that kiss. We've been wanting this ever since we met, and ironically, I wanted it more.

His mouth was harsh and fervent against mine, his tongue wasting no time before it quickly slipped between my lips without much of a warning. His tongue explored every inch of my mouth and took as much control as he wanted to as he brought one of his hands to discard my brassiere, he struggled a bit at first but he managed to unhook it and discarded the flimsy material along with the rest of forgotten clothes. He pulled back to capture the image of my newly exposed skin. And he wasn't subtle, at all.

I almost felt intimidated under his deep and penetrating gaze as he shamelessly ogled my exposed body. I was completely exposed to him, completely vulnerable and right now, he could do whatever the fuck he wanted with me. And that scared me, it scared me just how quickly he took control over me after years of fighting against it.

With a hard swallow and a bob of his Adam's apple, Matthew slowly licked his lips, scraping his teeth against his slightly swollen bottom lip in a way that almost made me roll my eyes back into my head. But I didn't, instead I just locked eyes with him as he brought his face down and wrapped his lips around one of my breasts and his tongue swirled around the sensitive bud almost expertly, using one of his hands to toy with the other.

"O-oh fuck." I couldn't help but helplessly moan into the air as my hands found their way into his mop of brown curls. This reaction certainly delighted the bastard above me because I could feel his eyes burning into my face and his lips curving into a smirk around me before he slowly pulled back, latching on to my nipple as he pulled off it.

"You have a very filthy mouth, jeez." He tisked, slightly shaking his head disaprovingly but still had that fucking smirk of his.

Clearly, I wasn't amused, in the slightest, so his stupid comment earned him a nice and concise, "fuck you." 

But then again, it didn't have the effect I hoped for.

"Mhm, yeah, you're about to." He retorted one last time before bringing his face back up to mine, capturing me in a heated and messy kiss that only worked as distraction from the journey Matthew's hands took down south. I was only brought back to reality when I felt my underwear being ripped away and the cool air hitting me. And he was quick to pull down his own boxers and allowed his length to spring free. And I couldn't even play off the fact that I had to stare, my mouth slightly hanging open at the sight of him.

"You're so cute when you stare." He taunted, his words being fairly tame in contrast to his very dark and not innocent tone. The sound of his voice made me flicker my eyes to meet his face. Big mistake, because the borderline devious smirk on his face didn't help, at all. And it certainly didn't help when he positioned himself between my legs, rubbing himself on my already dripping heat.

"You do have condoms here, right?" He asked, but I wasn't paying attention, with him rubbing himself on my slick, I couldn't really pay much attention to anything. "I could just fuck you bareback, I'm clean, so I don't care. But it's up to you." He spoke again, slightly teasing my entrance with the tip of his length, hoping to actually get my attention, and I actually listened this time.

Biting my lip, I mentally cursed at my lack of sexual activity because it just so happened that I had no condoms. Matthew gave me an expectant look, not to pressure me, but just waiting impatiently. I knew if I told him to stop he would without a second thought, but he would just leave. I wasn't going to make that mistake twice.

"I'm clean too, just," I chewed on my bottom lip, already shuddering with anticipation as I hooked my legs around his slim torso, pulling him closer, "just take me, please just fucking take me already."

I didn't have to say it twice.

Without a second thought, he propped himself up on his arms and pressed his face against mine as he slammed into me in one swift motion. A strangled moan erupted from my throat as he buried himself to the hilt, stretching me open at once. And fuck, the feeling of him inside me was intoxicating, addicting even, I don't think I've ever felt like this before.

This was so fucking wrong. So wrong, so wrong to be fucking the guy my friend dated, so wrong to be fucking the guy I swore to everyone I hated. It was just wrong. So why the hell did it feel so right? It was so perfectly right the way our bodies felt together, like they simply belonged there, buried deeply within one another. I never wanted to stop feeling like this.

It was almost dizzying just how good he felt. And with the quick and fervent pace he set for himself right from the start, I knew I probably wouldn't last long. With my eyes rolled into my head, my open mouth and my body sprawled out on the bed as I tried to find something to hold on to, he probably had one hell of a view. And he enjoyed it too, because his thrusts only became harsher.

"Fuck, sweetheart, you're so fucking beautiful," he cursed through gritted teeth, his hands holding my hips down with a vice like grip, making sure I couldn't move. And it wasn't for lack of trying. My body shook and shuddered like a fucking earthquake around him but he simply held me down as he continued.

"You feel so good too. I can't believe you made me wait two fucking years for this. Fuck." He nearly shouted, slamming into me with an insane amount of force and clenched his eyes shut, almost as if the thought made him angry, "two fucking years to take what was mine."

His. He called me his.

Fuck, I wish those filthy words didn't have such a strong effect on me, but boy did they make a number on me. I couldn't even hold back the guttural cry that erupted from my chest as I nodded feverishly, not really realizing what I was nodding to. 

"Yes! Fuck yes, Matthew, I'm yours!" I almost screamed, saying whatever incoherent thoughts flashed through my mind, letting the whole floor know just how much fun I was having and with whom. And with my mind and thoughts being too clouded by the feeling of him, I didn't even think about what those words entailed.

But it didn't matter because they served their purpose regardless. I wasn't expecting just how much the words actually affected him, because his hips began to falter, his thrusts becoming longer but impossibly deeper. And I could see how concentrated he was, with sweat forming on his forehead, his teeth digging into his bottom lip and his breath was hard and short, like this was a task he was determined to finish. He was determined to ruin me.

Letting out a guttural and nearly animalistic groan, Matthew grabbed a hold of my hips and raised them so that each thrust would make him bottom out inside of me, knowing just how close we both were to our release. "Yeah, that's right, sweetheart, let the whole floor know who's making you feel this good," he growled as he gave one last final but brutal thrust, digging his fingers into my hips so tight I just knew I would have bruises tomorrow as he held me down on him, "let the whole floor know you're mine."

And just like that, my orgasm crashed into me, Matthew's harsh words of ownership sending me into a euphoric state of pleasure, my lips chanting his name like a mantra and my walls tightening around him as he came deeply into me, my own name rolling off his tongue in a quiet praise. And the utter and absolute look of ecstasy on his face made up for the bruises I would have to hide for the next few days and for the two years we've made each other's life a living hell. Because right now, seeing that look of being completely fucked, I just wanted nothing more than to just stay like this.

The second we were no longer blinded by our highs, he fell forward, nearly crushing me under his weight as he struggled to get himself up. Yeah he looked fucked alright. Despite knowing damn well he could've easily rolled off me, he didn't, he simply rested his head on my chest and closed his eyes like he was just going to sleep there. A small smile made its way to my lips at the sight of his tousled brown curls on my chest, ignoring all logic, I ran my fingers through the messy locks, and they were in fact as soft as they always looked. 

Realizing just how bad this was for me, and just how vulnerable I actually looked, I smacked his forehead, successfully earning a glare from him once he lifted his head, looking dead at me with his now soft amber eyes.

"You're crushing me, you ass, get off." I breathed out and rolled my eyes, being too exhausted to try and get him off myself. And knowing just how easily he corrupted me, I didn't need another thing to make this harder.

"Okay, okay, jeez." Matthew rolled his eyes, letting his head back into my chest exhaustively and groaned tiredly into my chest before he gathered just enough strength to roll off me and collapsed beside me, his reddened and sweaty chest still rising and falling unevenly as he was still trying to steady his breathing. And I was trying, too. And we just stared, we stared at each other, saying nothing. There was nothing to be said. It was better that way.

After a long long while of silently staring at each other, he brought a hand to my face and rested it there, his thumb mindlessly rubbing over the warm skin of my cheek and he smiled, he simply smiled. And it felt good, it felt comforting, sweet even, it was a funny contrast after what he just did to me.

"So.. About our project.."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Tag list:

Matthew Gray Gubler

All- @aberrant-annie @marauder-exe @vquezada84 @boiled-onionrings @writeronkeyboard @l0ve-0f-my-life @mariaramz @soederberg

OUaT in NYU-

So I'm starting a tag list for this fic because it will be a mini series so let me know if you'd like to be added to the once upon in NYU tag list

[syubub]

NAMJOON SOULMATE READING

Disclaimer~ tarot is interpretation and it is in no way fact. Take it with a grain of salt and lets continue

Oki. Let me just say some words. I forgot to take a picture of the cards BUT I made a video? You might be wondering, "why a vid?" And I'd say, "idk, nan mola." I might post it (I'd definitely have to make a YouTube channel for that and I'm not really intrested in doing videos that often but I honestly thought, "hey I should record so its faster to write it down and make sense of my thoughts" and then I was like, "well, if I do a video then I won't have to type" and that was intriguing but the video was over an hour long and I go on so many tangents its nuts (also editing who? Don't know her) I think its also nice to have written out version that just gets to the point (I personally prefer written ones because I have the attention span of a fucking goldfish) So long story short. Maybe I'll upload it for those who want to watch but if I do, don't wate your time if you dont want to. All the key info is written here. blah blah blah let's get to Joonie.

Right off the bat I just want to say that both him and his soulmate have the same energy color. It's like a silver-white color? (This is just how I personally perceive energy) Through the process of connecting with Nams and his Soulmate, I envisioned him putting his hand up to mine as a way to I guess channel his energy to me? It was like a stringy thing on my palm and then I mirrored him putting his hand over his heart and then to his forehead and then he was gone? It was like he gave me a tether to his energy which hasn't really happened before. It still felt kinda distant but still like I was trustworthy enough to have a line to him? Idk if that makes any sense or not but there. Now onto the soulmate.

I got some messages from his soulmate. I feel like we had a weak connection that was only there because Namjoons energy let me into it. So the first message was, "You need to leave her" wut. I asked my guides like, "hey, do I need to write that down?" And they were like yeah fam you gotta. Okay. I have no clue. Part of me thinks it was more of a warning to joon. Maybe his soulmate is cautious of people poking around his energy idk. It could be anything. So there's that.

For the other messages I got, "open your mind more", "You're strong, don't be taken for granted" and "ones own soul" that last one makes no sense to me but maybe you need to have iq 148 or be the soulmate of Namoo to get it. I think the others make sense. They are pretty self explanatory.

Now, onto the cards. So knight of cups fell out and I was like ?? And I asked like, "what do I do with this?" And it was v clear that this is his soulmates personality. Like this card represents the soulmate. Now. This is VERY romantic. Romantic af is all over my notes. Also, Joon knows his soulmate. I'm pretty sure. That might come in handy later. This person is in touch with their intuition and emotions. They are compassionate and understanding as fuck. Also I touch with their more feminine energy. I also made a note for a possible career in the art field. V v v loving. Also a possible Taurus, Virgo or Air sign. (I lean towards virgo) personality cards are damsel, warrior, judge, gossip and destroyer. This person is very strong and helps to bring perspective. They have a way of making you think in a way you never had before. I wrote down, "its like panning for gold, you bring up a bunch of shit. Stir up the riverbed, to find pieces of gold". Its constructive and organized chaos. (Art???) They make you consider things with a more critical and objective eye.

Okay, so the next cards are kind what his Soulmate brings out in him/what they help joon with. Justice rev. King of swords rev. And queen of wands. So Justice rev. Represents a lack of accountability, unfairness, dishonesty and favoritism. So I think his soulmate essentially checks him when he gets to close to any of these things. Like his soulmate is all, "hey, you made a mistake. I trust you'll do the right thing and right your wrongs"like this person essentially helps to point out what he might be too close to see. King of swords rev. Represents quiet power, inner truth, misuse of power, manipulation. So with this, his soulmate helps him to discover his inner truth and quiet power but also when he gets too... into it... it can turn toxic and become manipulative and he can maybe use his power in a not so healthy way. I don't think its conscious but its there. And for queen of wands, it represents courage, confidence, independence, determination. This is so cute. His soulmate amplifies all of these amazing qualities that he already has in himself. His soulmate encourages and fosters these amazing qualities. Its so cute. Its hard to really convey the feeling but damn. Its cute as fuck.

As far as the relationship goes we had the world, 10 of coins, 9 of coins and 8 of wands rev. So. They rich. They are so abundant and this is in a sense of self sustainability and stability as well as in a family sense. Now now now. Everyone is curious about joon and if hes married with kids and what not. Idk. Thats my answer. Idk. But he and his soulmate will def have luck in the family department (child or no). Now. With the world and 8 of wands rev. There is a sense that they might be on pause or that they are waiting for something to end before the relationship reaches its full potential. Now. With the 8 of wands rev. It can mean rushing into something (like kids and marriage) and I think that joon and his soulmate are smart enough to know that it might not be responsible right now. OR they have already rushed into it and are now keeping everything private until BTS enlist and go on hiatus. The world symbolizes a completing of a cycle (successfully) so that drives home that they are haulted where they are until they can start a new chapter. There is also a chance that they are acquaintances or something but won't pursue a relationship until later on.

Now we have Play, Boundries and Protection. This is also about the relationship. They have a very strong respect for eachother so they have very strong boundaries and they protect themselves and eachother. It's very healthy.

Now we have progress not perfection, ready to love and prosperity. They are so so so supportive of eachother and encourage eachother to grow and be better people. They both also have gone through a period of learning that they are worthy of love. They also have a prosperity mindset. Its about abundance and being like, "wow, I have everything I ever could have asked for" and they are truly greatful for all that they have. Theres also a feeling of money guilt from Namoo but I'll not go on a tangent for that.

Now we have stop obsessing, stop whining, and stand by your commitment. essentially the world is scary and these cards are to Nams from his soulmate. They essentially mean, stop obsessing about what you can't change and don't wallow in it. It doesn't serve you. All you can do is move forward. Also, making good on your promises. Seeing shit to the end and not leaving unfinished business.

Now now now we have the physical qualities: serious, long hair, gifts, physical touch, feminine, music, music (again), introvert, romantic, sweet, playful (I think its intresting bc I have a lot of physical descriptions in my little cards but pulled more personality...)

And for little cards that soulmate wants Joo to know: faith, Fate, seek, healthy, selfless

Now now now now. We have the finishing oracle cards. Dream a beautiful dream and going beyond normal. These essentially talk about seeing beauty in chaos, letting things not go according to plan and being okay with it, seeing beauty as it is instead of trying to fit it into a box. One of my favorite sentiments is along the lines of not trying to fit the ocean in a teacup but rather learning to swim and not confining something so vast into a small vessel. Don't confine yourself to please others. Live on the fringe of normality and push boundries.

TLDR: Namoo has a sweet soulmate who wants him to grow and become a better person. Its super great and supportive and he and his soulmate probably read books together and have museum dates. Soft af. A subtle domestic love.

[sunsinrinn]

Secrets Part 10.

Bakugo x reader, Bakugo x Uraraka, Kirishima x Reader

language, angst pure fucking angst

Word Count: 1,248

Idea: Y/n has a secret to share with bakugo not expecting a secret from him. She leaves heart broken and attempts to move on. But how will she move on if her secret can no longer be hidden? She fakes a relationship hoping its enough to not expose the true origin of the secret. (This is a terrible summary but I cant say much without spoiling future parts. 🙃)

You back track, “But I still love you too!”

Kirishima lets out a sigh in relief.

And you looked confused as hell. ‘Why is he sighing?’

“A-aren’t you mad, Kiri?”

“N-no! Actually what I wanted to tell you something about that...

“I have feelings for him as well”

Well shit. You both love him. Does that mean he doesn’t love you you though?

“Look at us, in love with the same man.” You say shakily attempting to hold back tears.

“But we still love each other right?” He asks with an equally shaking voice.

“Oh baby, I will always love you! How could I just stop loving you?”You pull Kirishima closer. “Look at me, I will never stop loving you, but I also love Bakugo. Nevertheless, You were there for me in all of my hard times and I want you to be here for our future. I want to continue to build a future with you.” He nods his head in agreement and pulls you in relieved that he wasn’t going to lose you.

“So, what do we.. what do we go about Bakugo...” he whispers

“I don’t know... We can’t tell him because obviously he is going to freak out.

“ If we tell him anyways, he will probably choose you in the end. If it does come to that. Just know I will let you go so you can be happy.” He says and you pull away angrily.

“I WILL NOT FUCKING LET YOU GO! Fucking understand that Kirishima, you made my life better, I can’t lose you!” You say in tears and kirishima pulls you in again and just holds you tight.

Finally you both pull away and wipe your tears.

You sniff and say out loud, “We should clean up a bit before Bakugo comes home and notices somethings off..”

“Yeah...” Both of you get up and head to the bedroom to fix your tear stained faces.

Bakugo is finally able to go home after a day of patrolling and paperwork. He is content as he walks home still thinking of what happened during lunch today. Once he finally makes it to the house he knocks on the door before entering to make sure you and Kirishima knew he was home.

Instantly, once he notices that you’re are sitting alone in the living room and kirishima is in another room, that something is wrong. He won’t mention it but knows it has to do with earlier today. He has a sliver of hope that you might want him back but dismisses it so he doesn’t feel guilty.

“Hey Y/N, I’m back” he says

You look up from your phone and give him a fake smile, “Hey Bakugo! How was the rest of your day?”

“It was okay, was stuck with paper work after lunch” he says rubbing his neck, “Where is kirishima?”

“I think he might be in our room” you say unsure not looking at him anymore.

He nods and walks to his room, “Alright” and leaves you alone.

During dinner, he notices the tension between you and kirishima. Which makes things very uncomfortable. He tries to make conversation but it dies down. He just decides to stay silent for the rest of dinner. He tries to eat quickly so he can leave the tension filled table.

As soon as he is in his ‘room’ he sits there confused as to why you guys were acting this way. Was is because of something he said at work? Did he cross a line? Or was it because you both remembered what he did to you?

Then he remembers about his baby. And he becomes pissed himself.

He then thinks of when shall be the right time to ask you or if you were going to even fucking tell him. Then he decides what to do.

He hears a muffled conversation on the other side of the wall and tries to not listen but does manage to hear a few words like confessing, the baby, he sits up at the mention of the baby and tries to listen on but suddenly you both stop talking.

And with that he goes to sleep.

As the weeks pass by you are looking even bigger and you are a week away from giving birth which means you rarely go out so no one suspects you even avoid Bakugo which makes it hard for him to confront you,

You mostly stay in your house and even decline hanging out with mina because she will murder you if she found out you lied about the kid.

People don’t notice and just believe you have gotten more exhausted as you ‘grew’

You don’t even go to buy groceries, Kirishima and Bakugo go for you. Honestly, you and kirishima believe Bakugo doesn’t even notice your huge belly, oh he does. He also noticed the tension between the both of you is slowly diminishing.

Finally he finds you in the kitchen and corners you on a day he has off.

You look startled at him and nervously laugh.

“So... what a lovely day right?” You say nervously.

“Y/N, I want to talk to you about something that has been bothering me.”

You gulp nervously and begin to feel your heart rate speed up, “okay...”

“I notice you look a bit too big to be 6 months pregnant.”

‘Shit’

He continues when you dont answer,

“Which means you are either lying about how long you have been pregnant, or you are carrying fucking triplets.”

You continue to stay silent, which frustrates bakugo making him raise his voice.

“TELL ME Y/N! Are you fucking lying?”

You get scared and gulp, “I have no clue what you are talking about.”

“STOP FUCKING WITH ME Y/N! I KNOW YOU ARE LYING! I HEARD YOU! THAT IS MY FUCKING KID! NOT KIRISHIMA’S! I JUST WANT YOU TO FUCKING ADMIT IT! I FUCKING LOVE YOU, WHY CAN’T YOU JUST BE HONEST WITH ME!” By the end of that he tears up and you are just terrified for you life that he found out but continue to deny it.

“I have no clue what you mean, bakugo.” You say trying to be calm and ignore the pain deep down in you.

“STOP FUCKING LYING! PLEASE FUCKING ADMIT ITS MY KID. I WANT TO BE THERE FOR THEM! DONT TAKE THAT AWAY FROM ME!”

You see him fall to the floor and you are petrified because you have never seen him like this. It wasn’t like him to cry or show emotion, which scared you even more.

Before you could answer you feel another pain and cry out. Bakugo looks up and sees you clutching your stomach as liquid falls down.

‘Shit.’ He thinks as he scrambles up, to look for the keys of your almost never used car. Once he finds them he rushes over to you and carries you to the car and calls Kirishima.

“Bakugo, what’s wrong?”

“ITS Y/N! SHE’S IN PAIN, IM TAKING HER TO THE DOCTOR!”

You let out another scream of pain and Kirishima just begins to yell at Bakugo to speed you over to the hospital.

“Hurry the fuck up Bakugo! She’s in fucking pain! What caused her to become hurt anyways?”

Bakugo stays silent at the question.

“Bakugo. What. Caused. Her. Pain?” Kirishima asks angrily.

“I may have yelled at her about the pregnancy. And accused her of lying.”

After he finishes that sentence Kirishima growls and hangs up.

‘Well shit.’

SERIES MASTERLIST — Part 11

A/N- i hope you guys enjoy this chapter! Lots of angst, lmao, another little cliffhanger, honestly whats a good story with out those. Anyways Bakugo is a lil bitch and will probs be murdered by kirishima.

If you’d like to be tagged in future parts or future works dont hesitate to dm, ask, or comment! I hope you guys had a lovely day today! Also if you asked to be tagged and I didnt tag you send me a dm so I can fix it :)

Secrets taglist- @hero-ink-pillar , @silentw-lkr , @ushiwakatrash , @purple-rabanito , @chaelysian , @puppycat714 , @fake-id-69 , @adaydreaminganon , @jessie9008 , @sam-i-am-1025 , @purple--nebula , @curiouslilbeast , @httpswwwtbhkcom , @setup-the-ace , @chanultis , @kit-kat428 , @thatonefangirl722 , @fxirylightsx , @katsuki-bakubae , @sakurakatsuki , @whatishappinesswhatislove , @wannabedaphne

[glitteronadumpsterfire]

I'm a fucking wreck rn I haven't been sleeping for a week and I'm getting some rest from the bullshit factory that is my brain only now, but I just wanted to say that last year for me has been saved by tumblr and all the friends I made along the way.

Before you go below the cut, a special thanks goes to the Bee Movie Anon, who, rightfully, I can't tag so I have to say it here in the hope that they'll see it. Your hunger for chaos made me feel a lot of emotions, and I'd have never in any time or space thought that the Bee Movie would be such a prominent part of my life as it is now thanks (read it with a note of sarcasm) to you. Thank you for providing us an infinite amount of both entertainment and suffering, hell, some of the friends I made were because of YOU. I'm still not sure what was your drive to go and start this absurd crusade for the bee movie in the 80s metal fandom, but I don't know, I don't think bee so, I'm not gonna question your ways.

@arnold-layne being the first in line, you kept me sane somehow in the first phases of quarantine and dedicated a lot your time to talk with me and helped me enormously with creativity. If it wasn't for you, that Cyberpunk Comic That Is Kinda Inspired By The Crüe and Shout At The Devil would've been already down the drain. I would've given up probably, because I didn't know how to exted the concept and have an actual plot. A dream that I've been having for literal years wouldn't even have such cool characters with a rich storyline if it wasn't for you. I know I kinda left it after a month or so of intense brainstorming with you, I was literally drained at that point both physically and mentally, but oh boy I haven't forgot about the characters that WE created. How could I after all? Russ being the wreck of a tormented junkie protagonist that he is, Dylan the happy-go-lucky fuck up that seems to do nothing right but with the best intentions, Frankie the runaway sassy and wary androgynous teenager whose gender is a mystery even to themselves, and the epitome of the found family trope, ex gov agent part Japanese, part Russian, part cyborg Vik, whose story isn't still clear yet but we'll give him a very good one, eventually.

You gave me the curiosity to read fanfiction again after literally NINE YEARS of being distant from that part of the fandom and honestly I don't regret it one bit. In fact, I discovered literally my favorite writer in fanfiction. That is you, Arnold. I don't care how frequently you write, I don't care if sometimes you can't do your best. I'll always be there waiting for the next chapter and I'll always think that your art is sublime. I'll have to admit, I don't read your works as often as I should. But it's because I love them so much that I want to always save for later. It's like a drug, or a delicious cake that you want it to last as long as possible so you can enjoy it for much longer (I should be reading your fic more often either way tho like, at least so I can make more art for it. I'll make sure to change that this year and give you the recognition you deserve 🖤).

Everytime I make art, everytime I make a post, I always wait for your name to pop in my notifs. And fuck if I'm happy when I see it, and I rush to read your tags and it always makes my day. Like seriously, you mean so much to me and I admire how you can still be any amount of sane with all you're going through. You're strong as hell, keep going. 🖤

@i-dont-like-rice dude, how can I explain it. You're my best bud here. You're my chaotic sibling from another mother. The other braindead I share the single braincell I have with. The Nikki to my Tommy. Or the Tommy to my Nikki, I'm still not sure which of us is which (I guess I'm Nikki and you're Tommy? lmao it's ironic how even them are an italian and a balkanian) but you get the point. Every interaction we have, I laugh my ass off till my whole body hurts every time. I think I worried my mother and annoyed my sister at least a couple times for bursting out laughing for five minutes straight out of the blue, especially if it was late at night, and all the times, I swear it was because of you. You are as chaotic as you are kind, and it's always so disarming to see you worry or take care of others when you are definitely in a worse situation. Please, be more selfish, goddammit. For your own sake. And be more confident of your art. Draw shit and post it. Who cares if it's not perfect and you hate it and you don't want anybody to see it, it's tumblr, nobody will ever reblog it or give you the well deserved recognition anyway! So it's worth a try isn't it?

@no-stone-no-bone seriously, I'm so glad I met you. You're like the third element of chaos that holds me and Andi together. All three of us are literally unstoppable. You're extremely sweet too and I wish you the best, and DON'T HIDE SHIT IN THE TAGS GODDAMMIT 😂

@white-lightning-625 @viiinceneil I know we really haven't talked much, and we met through unfortunate times, but I'm so glad that something good came out of the chaos and drama, which is being able to talk to you and getting to know you both better. And the fics. My god, the fics. Frankie, I already told you this but MY GOD. I still find it incredible that I've read a fic about a band I didn't even know what they looked or sounded like and I was HOOKED from start to finish. And Katie, I should definitely read more of your works because I love what you've got going on. You're both very sweet and talented with a very distinct, beautiful way of writing and I can't wait to sink my teeth into the pulp of your work, because I know that by now I only scratched the surface.

@awrestlinggirlwholoves80sbands Bruh, conoscere una fan su tumblr the parla la MIA STESSA LINGUA (e che ha pure il mio stesso vero nome lmao cosa sta succedendo)??? Che concetto innovativo!!! Le nostre conversazioni sono sempre disgiunte, ma non importa, adoro ogni nostra interazione. Sei seriamente una delle persone più dolci e gentili che abbia mai conosciuto. La tua creatività stimola sempre la mia. Le tue moodboard sono sempre 👌👌👌 e ogni volta trovo sempre qualcosa che sì, ci avevo pensato, ma mai nel modo in cui lo poni tu, e di solito sono una persona che resta vicina alle proprie idee, ma tu riesci a farmi alterare prospettiva, e trovo questo meccanismo mentale molto affascinante. Ti ricordi lo swapped instruments AU, con Tommy come cantante, no? Giuro che è un concetto a cui penso ancora dopo mesi. Spero di avere la capacità mentale per tradurre quell'idea in arte il prima possibile, perché cazzo, lo adoro troppo

@tattooed-lies thank you for providing the fandom the best gifs in the fucking platform and thank you for giving us the vinikki content that everyone, even if they're not aware, deserves and needs. Thank you for being the only Vince stan that I know. Thank you for being the sweetest person alive 💖

@nbtommylee honestly, I wish I was cool like you. Your sense of humor is impeccable, much like your critical thinking. I have never read something from you that wasn't a valid point. You don't talk shit and that's extremely sexy of you, y'know? And having a "gender dysphoria buddy" to be jealous of our Rockstar Gender Of Choice with is always fun to have, so that's definitely a plus. Can't wait to see (and read!) more of your art, I just love your style so much and you deserve to be Known

@metalmelkor @emometalhead @polka-dot-duff I'm always so happy to see you in my notifs and y'all are oh so very sweet and cool, we haven't talked much but I love every interaction we have, sorry for having the social skills of a stale piece of white bread 🖤

A special thanks goes to @awesomgrlgr8job bc you're literally one of my very first mutuals since I made the decision to make this dumpster fire of a blog and holy shit it's crazy to think about that. I don't even know if we ever interacted that much but it's always such a joy to see you around, ily and I hope you're doing well and thanks for putting up with my clownery for so long 💖

Like seriously, thank you all. I don't even know where I would be without you. Here's to another year of chaos, but only of the good kind 💖

[shadowhuntertrash]

High Notes

Chapter 7

I dont own anything Cassandra Clare does 💕

  The first thing Thomas noticed when he woke up was the unfamiliar weight across his stomach. He opened his eyes to investigate and felt his heart skip a beat because he remembered now where he was.The memories of last night flashes in his head like a movie and Thomas had to fight the groan rising in his throat.

   He was in Alastair’s room. He slept with Alastair. Thomas felt himself blush at the thought. He hadn’t slept with Alastair; he had just slept next to him. Or under him, his mind suggested unhelpfully. Thomas blushed furiously and looked down at Alastair.

  Alastair always looked peaceful when he slept. His head was cushioned against Thomas’ chest, his arm slung over Thomas’ stomach. It was so very intimate that Thomas couldn’t help but smile and stay frozen hoping against hope that he could lay there for a while longer. 

   Fate seemed to be in a good mood because Alastair remained asleep for another ten minutes. Thomas watched his face, the way his eyes moved under his eyelids. The way his mouth ghosted with a smile or a frown. The way he twitched when something occurred in his dream. Thomas wished he was able to read minds, he wanted to know what Alastair dreamed about. Thomas almost laughed at the thought, knowing that if the roles were reversed and Alastair looked in on Thomas’ dreams he would find them filled with himself. 

   Alastair started shifting his eyes fluttering as if he was trying to open his eyes but they were too heavy, Thomas assumed that’s what they felt like. Thomas sighed and Alastair froze. Thomas cursed himself mentally and stretched his arms as if he was just now waking up. He yawned loudly and Alastair scrambled off of him with much more grace than Thomas could dream of having.

   “Good morning.” Alastair said, awkwardly shifting from foot to foot. Thomas smiled at him as if this was completely normal. “Good morning. Sorry for crashing.” Alastair snorted and Thomas smiled wider. So cute.

  “It’s fine. Is your head still hurting?” Alastair asked softly stretching. Thomas’ eyes drifted to where Alastair’s shirt had ridden up. He was toned and Thomas knew for a fact that he had a six pact, how was it even allowed to be that attractive. With his stupidly hot and stupidly smooth skin and his beautiful eyes. His full lips- nope.

   Thomas cleared his throat and shook his head. He started feeling around him and checked his pockets. He looked up curiously at Alastair. “Where’s my phone?” Alastair lifted an eyebrow and started looking around as well. Eventually Alastair picked up his phone and chucked it at him, a blur of red that landed roughly on Thomas’ lap. 

   He flinched at the impact and Alastair rushed out an apology which Thomas just waved off. Thomas turned his phone on and it lit up with a picture of him, Matthew, James, and Christopher. Lucie had taken it and it had an aesthetic that Thomas loved. The sun was setting in the background so all you could see of the boys was their shape, they looked like shadows and he loved it.

   He had a bunch of texts from James, Matthew, and Christopher. The memory of standing in front of James and Matthew’s door came back and Thomas screwed his face up and shook his head. He did NOT need that to stay in his head. 

   He decided they didn’t need to know where he was yet and threw his phone back to the bottom of the bed and flopped down. Alastair was still standing next to the bed with a crooked smile on his face. His phone case was clear but there was a polaroid picture of him and Cordelia is fancy clothes from some party.

   Cordelia’s words fluttered back into Thomas’ head. ‘Thomas, be careful with him.’ He flicked his eyes up to the ceiling not wanting to be caught staring at Alastair right now. He ran over the words in his head. Did she mean to be careful with him because Thomas could get hurt? He knew it was likely that his… affection was not reciprocated and that he would likely get hurt but for some reason that didn’t feel like what she was trying to say.

   Was she insinuating that Thomas should be careful with him because Alastair was fragile or something of the like? Thomas was growing frustrated. He couldn’t hurt Alastair if Alastair didn’t like him. Cordelia was off her rocker, she must be to think Thomas could ever hurt him, he wouldn’t ever even want to. 

   Thomas was pulled out of his internal monologue by Alastair's smooth voice. “Do you want to go get breakfast? It’s,” He paused to check the time on his phone and chuckled. “It’s eleven so the other’s probably already ate and the hotel breakfast isn’t serving so we can go get something.” Thomas groaned. 

   He was supposed to have gone to practice with the boys at nine. No wonder he had so many texts, he felt bad but at the same time he had never missed any rehearsals before and wanted nothing more than to go eat with Alastair. 

   “Alastair.” He groaned dragging out the ‘r’. He briefly wondered when they had become close enough to not freak out about being themselves with each other. When they started being friends and not acquaintances. He had been under the impression that they weren’t friends but Alastair had acted as if they were lifelong friends since the moment they saw each other. Well, besides him calling Thomas ‘Lightwood’, but honestly Thomas didn’t mind it.

   “Lightwood.” Alastair said in response laughing and dragging the ‘d’ for an unnecessarily long time. “I was supposed to meet the boys but if they ask when I get there tell them I woke up right before going there. Don’t mention breakfast.” Alastair laughed and nodded. “We haven’t even been on this tour a week and you’re already skipping? Deal anyway cause I’m hungry and need socialization. Where are we going?” Thomas shrugged to show his indifference. “You pick.” Thomas said, finally getting up.

   Alastair flopped on the bed laying where Thomas had been moments before. Thomas was trying to breathe correctly as it hit him at full force the fact that they had been sleeping together. As in cuddling, snuggling, dating kind of thing. Thomas and Alastair. Oh god oh god oh god.

   Thomas could feel himself start spinning into a panic attack he took a few staggering steps and sent Alastair an exasperated look that he was sure would have scared him had Alastair not been draping his arm over his eyes. “I-I’m gonna c-change. I’ll b-b-be right back.” He said all but running out of the room, ignoring Alastair’s distressed calls. 

   The hallways started spinning and Thomas fought it rushing to his room. He got to the door before realizing he had no idea what he did with his room key and Christopher was out with James and Matthew. They’re going to be upset Thomas thought distraught. He stood there shaking staring at the door too conscious of everything around him. No one had passed the hallway thankfully but Thomas felt bad. He felt as if he needed to get out of his body, like he was itchy and someone was wrapping their hands around his neck. 

   Thomas turned and slowly slid down the door to his room. He had almost calmed himself down when he saw Alastair walking quickly towards him. “Stupid hotel has too many hallways are you okay?” He asks kneeling in front of Thomas, not too close which Thomas was eternally grateful for. Thomas just nodded before stopping and shaking his head. “G-give me a second.” Alastair nodded and sat back on the balls of his feet.

   Thomas sighed and rested his head on the door. He gave it another five minutes and when he thought he was in the clear he sat up more and ran a slightly shaky hand through his hair. Alastair reached forward tentatively before deciding that was the wrong thing to do and retracting it. 

   “What set it off?” Alastair asked quietly. Thomas blushed, how was he supposed to say sleeping with him had? “I guess I just got stressed about missing rehearsal already.” Alastiar frowned, I was only joking you know that right? "I wasn’t trying to freak you out, it’s totally fine you missed. You weren't feeling well anyway.” Thomas nodded and leaned forward a little to rest his forehead on Alastair’s collarbone. 

   He always got touchy after panic attacks. Normally it was James or Matthew who received it but they weren’t here so Alastair would do. 

   Alastair brought his hand up hesitantly and started rubbing soothing circles on his back. Thomas felt his heart skip a beat and was glad Alastair couldn’t see the blush on his face. “I’m sorry.” He said so quietly he was sure Alastair hadn’t heard. Alastair let out a breath and Thomas would have given anything in that moment to know what Alastair was thinking.

   “You don’t have to apologize for things like that Thomas. Not with me or anyone I promise.” Thomas smiled weakly and pulled away, running his fingers through his hair. Alastair followed the movement and Thomas laughed lightly. “Okay. Thank you.” 

   Alastair shook his head a playful smile on his lips, “As much as I’m loving this, I’m rather hungry and you’re a snack but I’m thinking IHOP?” Thomas blanched and started sputtering while Alastair laughed standing up and reaching his hand down for Thomas to take.

   Thomas took it, avoiding eye contact because did Alastair just freaking flirt? Did he just call Thomas a snack? That was a good thing right? He made a mental note to ask Matthew what it meant later. They walked together in silence, not uncomfortable but calm, and when they got to the car Alastair casually opened the door for him. 

   Thomas raised an amused eyebrow, Alastair wasn’t one to exactly be a ‘gentleman’. He was a nice person but he didn’t really go out of his way to help other people.

   Alastair got in the driver's seat and turned on some music before pulling out of the parking lot. They listened to a few songs before one of Alastair’s songs came on, his voice filling the car. Alastair blushed and reached out to turn the channel but Thomas grabbed his wrist to stop him and just started singing along.

   When the song finished Thomas turned to look at Alastair with an excited look, and was surprised to see Alastair still blushing. “Okay but hear me out,” Thomas started excitedly. Alastair turned to look at him for a second before turning back to the road. “I’m listening.” He said with an amused tint to his voice. Thomas ignored it and went straight to his idea. 

   “What if the last few concerts we start doing random groups for a few songs? Like we do our normal concerts and then mix up the groups and each mixed up group could sing a song?” Alastair pulled into the parking spot in front of IHOP and turned to look at Thomas. Thomas could practically hear the gears turning in his head.

   “So what like we put names in a hat and draw kind of thing? Or we just break the groups up?” Thomas thought about it for a minute before nodding, “I think the hat idea would be fun don’t you? We could stick to having a solo, a group of four and a duet but have them different every night.” Alastair threw him a crooked smile. “Honestly, that sounds super fun and I’m one hundred percent down.”

  Thomas smiled brightly at him as he ran through possibilities. The only thing he didn’t want to happen was get the solo part. He hated doing things solo but he felt like it wouldn’t be the end of the world. He knew some fans wouldn’t like it, but they couldn’t please everyone.

   Thomas and Alastair spent breakfast talking about the tour and what to expect and how excited they were. It was an hour later when they finally parted ways and Thomas walked into the building they had supposed to be practicing in for the last few hours.

   Thomas walked in the main room and was greeted by a load of questions. “Where did you go last night?” “Why are you late?” “Why weren’t you answering your phone?” “Are you okay? Don’t do that again you scared us!” Thomas just shook them off with a roll of his eyes.

   “I had a migraine so I went to go get some meds from Matthew’s room but Matthew and James were uhm…” He cleared his throat uncomfortably and was pleased to see the blush rise up on Matthew and James’ face as they realized what he had walked in during. “Anyway they were busy so I went to go see if Lucie happened to have any, but then I wound up at Alastair’s and threw up and then passed out there for the night. Nothing happened.” He said glaring at Matthew who was now wiggling his eyebrows suggestively. 

   Matthew nodded emphatically. “Oh of course and so you just woke up right?” Thomas nodded slowly knowing by Matthew’s tone that Matthew didn’t believe it at all. “Oh okay then why did you leave me on read for the past two hours?” Thomas froze realizing he didn’t have a good answer to that.

  “Okay so we might have gone to have breakfast, and I might have slightly ignored y’all because I was tired and wanted to have breakfast with Alastair.” Christopher and James laughed while Matthew mocked offense. 

   He put a hand to his chest as if Thomas had physically hurt him. “Thomas you wound me! We haven’t even had five rehearsals yet and you’re already skipping out?” Thomas rolled his eyes and noticed for the first time a boy, around their age, standing off to the side watching the boys interact with unreadable eyes.

   Thomas froze and just stared for a minute. He had dark black hair and startling green eyes. He was tall and slender, ghastly white skin poking out from the sleeves of his shirt. Thomas cleared his throat embarrassed at having been staring. “Sorry I didn’t see you there, I’m Thomas.” The boy put on a polite smile and shook Thomas’ outreached hand.

   “I’m Jesse, I’m the sound manager. I’ll be working with y’all for the trip. I’ll mostly be around before concert nights just to make sure things run smoothly and obviously I’ll be here for the concerts and such.” He said in a slightly monotone. Thomas was getting mixed vibes from him and didn’t quite know what to think of the unreadable boy in front of him.

   He had a feeling that this person was going to be important but didn’t quite know why or how. Thomas shook his head plastering his smile back on when he realized it had fallen slightly. He clapped his hands and turned back to his band mates. 

   “Okay so are we still practicing?” The boys nodded and went to grab their respective instruments while Jesse went around the table to the board that had a bunch of buttons and slidey things and Thomas was greatly appreciative of the fact that he didn’t need to know what they did. 

   “What song are we practicing?” Thomas asked Matthew as he slid the guitar strap over his neck and began tuning. “Do you want to do a new one or an old one?” Matthew asked him, adjusting the microphone to his height. “How about 7 Years?” Matthew nodded and looked at James and Christopher who both nodded back. “Okay.” Matthew said pointing to Jesse who pushed some buttons and pointed back signalling them to start.

Once I was seven years old my momma told me

Go make yourself some friends or you'll be lonely

Once I was seven years old

It was a big big world, but we thought we were bigger

Pushing each other to the limits, we were learning quicker

By eleven smoking herb and drinking burning liquor

Never rich so we were out to make that steady figure

Once I was eleven years old my daddy told me

Go get yourself a wife or you'll be lonely

Once I was eleven years old

I always had that dream like my daddy before me

So I started writing songs, I started writing stories

Something about that glory just always seemed to bore me

'Cause only those I really love will ever really know me

Once I was twenty years old, my story got told

Before the morning sun, when life was lonely

Once I was twenty years old

I only see my goals, I don't believe in failure

'Cause I know the smallest voices, they can make it major

I got my boys with me at least those in favor

And if we don't meet before I leave, I hope I'll see you later

Once I was twenty years old, my story got told

I was writing 'bout everything, I saw before me

Once I was twenty years old

Soon we'll be thirty years old, our songs have been sold

We've traveled around the world and we're still roaming

Soon we'll be thirty years old

I'm still learning about life

My woman brought children for me

So I can sing them all my songs

And I can tell them stories

Most of my boys are with me

Some are still out seeking glory

And some I had to leave behind

My brother I'm still sorry

Soon I'll be sixty years old, my daddy got sixty-one

Remember life and then your life becomes a better one

I made a man so happy when I wrote a letter once

I hope my children come and visit, once or twice a month

Soon I'll be sixty years old, will I think the world is cold

Or will I have a lot of children who can warm me

Soon I'll be sixty years old

Soon I'll be sixty years old, will I think the world is cold

Or will I have a lot of children who can warm me

Soon I'll be sixty years old

Once I was seven years old, my momma told me

Go make yourself some friends or you'll be lonely

Once I was seven years old

Once I was seven years old

   Matthew stopped singing and Christopher and Thomas stummed the last notes. Jesse smiled at them. “That was really good guys.” He said in a sincere voice Thomas smiled back at him. “Thank you.” He said politely watching Jesse start turning things off. Thomas turned to James who had also started packing up. “Are we done already?” Matthew raised an unamused eyebrow.

   “We have been practicing for hours, you didn’t bother to show up so I think you should practice a little more.” Thomas rolled his eyes. Most people would have found that rude but he knew that Matthew was just stressing over everything going well. Thomas had already planned on practicing extra anyway.

   The boys packed up and left after saying goodbye. Thomas continued plucking a few notes before he got out his notebook and a pencil to start writing. 

   About two hours later Thomas met up with the boys who were doing an instagram live with Cordelia, Lucie, and Alastair. Thomas smiled when Matthew flipped the camera around so they could see Thomas. “And here’s the late one. He decided to get breakfast with a friend instead of coming to rehearsal today.” Matthew said while Thomas laughed and rolled his eyes before turning the camera back to him.

   “Anyway back to the questions.” Matthew said squinting at his phone screen. “This one is for you Jamie, Levy wants to know what your favorite song is by The Beautiful Cordelia.” James screwed up his face, a tell tale sign he was thinking and finally looked back at the camera with  a smile. “Probably I Love It, that was a really good song.” Lucie laughed and nodded. “I loved that song Cordelia wrote most of it.” Cordelia blushed and rolled her eyes before looking at the phone and smirking as she read the next question. 

   “Thomas this one’s for you. Who were you skipping rehearsal for?” Thomas blushed and debated telling the truth or not. He didn’t want Alastair to get the wrong idea if he lied, he didn’t want him to think he was embarrassed or anything but he also didn’t want to say Alastair because then people would start rumors and Thomas didn’t want there to be dating rumors between them because then he would have to continuously deny something he wished would happen.

   Thomas shrugged. “I’m skipping that one.” He said calmly watching and Alastiar, James, Lucie, and Cordelia’s eyebrows all shot up. He mouthed tell you later and went around the couch where Matthew was sitting so he could read the questions coming in.

   There were quite a few that just said Thomas is all caps when he came into view but eventually they went back to questions. Thomas read them and then picked one he liked. “Alastair, this one wants to know if you have any new songs in the making.” Alastair smiled as Matthew shifted the phone so they could see him. “I do actually. I’m not sure yet when I’ll release them though.” 

   A bunch of comments began flooding in about how excited they were about the news. Thomas laughed reading them. He read one that asked when they’re first official concert was. “The first concert is happening tomorrow night.” Thomas chuckled at the excited comments. “I am very excited as well. I’m excited to meet you guys tomorrow.” He said  straightening and stretching, his muscles sore and fingers aching from hours of guitar. 

   Matthew started laughing and handed Thomas the phone. “The comments.” Matthew said unable to refrain from laughing hysterically. Thomas raised an eyebrow at his friend and looked at the comments, immediately blushing bright red. Apparently his shirt had ridden up to reveal his toned stomach.

   “Guys!” Thomas said eyes wide as he read the highly inappropriate messages. Thomas covered his face with his hand, handing Matthew the phone back. He hadn’t stopped laughing and couldn’t take it so Thomas thrust it in James’ hand instead. James took one look at the comments and started laughing as well.

   Thomas flipped them off with a groan, turning and walking to his room. He wanted to get a moment alone, something that would be scarce to come across the next few months. He let out a deep breath when he stepped into the room. He sat on his bed and pulled his songbook and guitar out.

   There was something different about writing and practicing. Sure he played the guitar in both but practice felt more forced and it automatically annoyed him, writing was more of a stress reliever for him.

   He got his phone out and took a video of the new song he was writing so the boys could practice it if he happened to be late. He was singing so Matthew could hear it first before he tried to just read the notes.

   When he was done he took a shower, turning the water as hot as it could go trying to ignore the growing pit of anxiety in his stomach over the fact that in less than twenty four hours they would have to go in front of tons of people performing songs that meant more to Thomas than any of them would ever know.

   Thomas shook the thought off and put new clothes on heading back to Lucie’s room to hang out for about an hour before he went to sleep, hopefully socializing would help distract him.

[bxthharmon]

Never Go Home Again, Pt. XII || JJ Maybank x Reader

Words: 3130

Series Warnings: violence / talking about abuse / toxic relationships / talking about nudes sex and sex tapes / drugs / underage drinking

Pt. Warnings: Guns / blood and violence

Series Summary: A new girl, a shoebox of old memories, a past she’s trying to forget coincide with a hotheaded, but selfless, boy.  teenagers getting in way over their heads

Pt. Summary: Chaos catches up, causing trouble for everyone involved

A/N: sorry for the slow updates, but with the event (tysm btw ily) i’ve been busy. i have a few more requests, and i promise im getting to them. anyway! feels weird, only 2 or 3 parts left. tysm for all this support <3

Chapters linked in my masterlist.

“masterlist”

JJ woke up before you. His face felt stiff from the tears he’d shed the night before, and the corners of his eyes were filled with sleep. He rubbed his eyes, phosphenes decorating his mind as he pulled them open. The window was wide open, curtains fluttering in the light breeze and the sun decorating the room with a natural glow. He became aware of the towel thrown over the dresser and the wet clothes hanging in the window sill, the memories of last night returning. He looked down at you.

You were curled up, one of his tops and a pair of his joggers covering your body as you gripped his arm lightly in your sleep. He blinked, admiring the lock of hair falling over your face, the curve of your lashes and the relaxed smile that adorned your sleeping frame. He brushed the hair out of your face and let it fall. He realised that he was in deep. Somewhere across the room, the ping of a phone notification pulled him from his thoughts. He looked up, seeing the bluish light coming from the floor on the other side of the room. He slid his arm from your hold, careful not to wake you as you unconsciously pulled the pillow into your grip instead. He rose from the bed, careful not to let the bed creak as he left you. He padded across the room, picking up the phone from the wooden floorboards.

The phone awoke as he lifted it, a series of fresh messages lining up under the time. 

Tyler: hey

Tyler: ik i fucked up with us, but i cant stop thinking abt seeing u when u visited

Tyler: can we try again?

Tyler: ik u said u were seeing someone and dont wanna fuck it up, but i still love u

Tyler: let me know. I miss u

He almost choked, heart beating in his ears as he looked back to your sleeping frame, rising and falling with oblivious breaths. He looked back at the phone, placing it on the dresser softly. He left the room, clicking the door shut as softly as he could, and making his way to the kitchen. He rinsed a mug and put the kettle on, rummaging through the cupboards for the instant coffee granules. He pulled the silver pot from the shelf, peeling the cap off and tapping it on the side of the mug so the granules tumbled in, the dark brown contrasting the light ceramic. He poured the contents of the boiling kettle in, watching the hot water consume the granules and turn brown. He stirred and sipped, hissing as it burnt his tongue. He never had the patience to wait for it to cool down.

He studied the cupboards again, finding no edible food, not trusting the bread after his previous experience. He sipped the coffee again, allowing himself to look back at the closed bedroom door. He wanted to know what happened when you went back, but knew he wouldn’t like the answer. After last night, he knew Tyler was an asshole, and wanted more than anything to fly to California and punch him in the face, but couldn’t understand the text. Thoughts were flashing through his head, ideas rushing to his head. He wondered if he should ask, or leave it and wait for you to tell him. He knew you had no obligation to him, but he also knew that you two had something going on. Whatever that something was. He sighed. 

He thought about how he felt when he saw you smile, how much he’d spiralled after your argument, how vulnerable he was around you. It hit him suddenly, an epiphany that took all his air away but made him feel alive, made him feel broken and brilliant all in one moment. He loved you.

Down the hall, on the other side of the door, he heard the bed creak. There was a pause, and then he heard the floorboards moan. Another minute, and he heard the ping of your phone notification. There was another pause, then the door opened and you stood in front of him, hair tousled by sleep and eyes fresh. You smiled at him, reaching out and pulling him in, kissing his temple and stepping away to make your own coffee. His heart pulled, not letting him push you away and reaching out as you left his arms, but not wanting it because of those stupid texts. In that moment, he fights his impulse and decides to wait for you to tell him. Would you tell him?

He draws his attention to you, hopping back onto the counter next to you. He watched you, enamored with the way you moved, the way you brush against him, the way you seem so carefree in the moment. He wants to kiss you, but he knows he won’t until he knows what’s going on. 

Faster than he wants to admit, you’ve finished your coffees and Kie and Pope are awake, moving about after leaving their slumber on the pullout couch, and then setting up the pulley for the well. Your mood changes when they’re up. You’re more talkative, brushing over any mention of the night before, helping when you can. You look back at him a couple of times, and each time his heart flutters.

You can feel blisters working on your skin as you help Pope with the winch, the rope burning at your skin in the force of the friction, but you don’t pay it any mind. You finish with the mechanism, stepping away and sitting down next to JJ, passing some witty banter with Kie, and opening a bottle of beer, the cool glass soothing the hot skin on your palms.

“What does it feel like?” Pope asked, watching Kie as she sat in the can hanging from the pulley.

“Feels good.” she confirms, pulling the rope slightly.

“John B’s pulling a Houdini.” JJ stated, putting his own beer down.

“Yeah, where is he?” you asked.

“I got my scholarship interview in the morning.” Pope reminded, “We gotta get this done.”

“Speak of the devil!” JJ grinned as John B strode past you all without so much as a ‘hello’. “Hey! Dude, I put up the entire winch to pull up the gold and everything.”

“No he did not.” You laughed.

“We did that.” Pope said, gesturing between you.

John B ignored you, and Kie called after him as he entered the Chateau. “Okay, that’s it?” you muttered.

“What’s that all about?” Pope asked, walking to you and JJ.

“I was gonna ask you the same question.” JJ said, you and him getting off the hot tub and following him into the Chateau. When you entered, John B was pulling the house apart, searching.

“You alright, man?” Pope asked, “What’s up?”

“What are you looking for?” Kie added.

“Bro, what’s going on, man?” JJ asked, following him as he pulled the gun from under the cushioning on the sofa.

“John B, what do you need the gun for?” You and JJ stepped forwards, both reaching to take the weapon. John B grabbed your shoulders, pushing you over and shoving past JJ as you all yelled for him to chill and talk to you. Pope tried to block his exit.

“What are you, JJ, now?” Pope asked as you and Kie yelled for him to calm down. John B pushed Pope back into the table as you followed him out, asking for him to explain, or calm down. You ran down the steps, the others close behind. He mounted the dirt bike, looking back at the four of you.

“John B, what the hell?” Kie yelled.

“Ward knows about the gold.” John B spoke for the first time. “He killed my dad.”

You ran as far as the dirt track, watching the bike disappear as JJ swore.

--

“What now, we just go up to the front door and ask, ‘Hey, have you seen John B’?”

The night felt dark, cold, and your boat felt fragile next to the stupidly big boat across the pontoon from you. The shape of the Cameron house was huge and adorned with golden windows on the other side of the lawn.

“Look, he lives in Tannyhill now, it’s plausible.” Kie reasoned, but you could tell she was just grabbing at loose ends. “We can play dumb.”

“Play dumb?” you frowned.

“It’s pretty late.” Pope added.

“Look, I’ve never seen John B like that. We should honestly be going to the cops.” Kie countered.

“The cops? And say what, Kie?” you almost laughed, “‘We’re worried about our friend because he’s going off on a rampage because Ward Cameron killed Big John’? They’re not gonna believe us!”

“Hey, I see Ward.” Pope interrupted you, binoculars up as he watched the house. Kie took the binoculars, checking for herself. “Doesn’t look dead to me, let’s go home.”

“What?” Kie turned, shocked and offended.

“Uh, okay. Obviously Mr Cameron is fine, and even if John B was here, he isn’t now, okay? Plus, I have the biggest, most important moment of my life in six hours.”

“Yeah, well our friend is in trouble.”

“I’m in trouble! Guys, I haven’t been home in three days! My dad’s probably put all my shit on the street by now.”

“Okay, so that’s it? In a time of need you’re just gonna bail? You’re just gonna walk away?”

“Okay, yo, guys.” You spoke from the other side of the boat, “Can we not do this right now?”

“Hey, I have a scholarship interview in the morning.” Pope reminded Kie.

“Okay, well what about John B?” Kie asked.

“Why is it always about John B?” Pope questioned, and you sighed, looking away as Kie looked around, caught off guard.

“It’s not always about John B. You’re so stupid! It would be any of you in this situation.”

“Bullshit!”

“Guys.” JJ tried to stop them.

“This is about friendship!” Kie powered on.

“Bring it down.” said JJ.

“This is about pogues for life!”

“What about forensic pathology, huh?” countered Pope.

“Forensic pathology?” Kie scoffed.

“It’s my life! It’s everything I’ve worked for!”

“That’s your priority?”

“Would you stop with the moral high ground bullshit?”

“Pope, come on.” you cut in.

“No.” he rejected, “No, no. She has no room to talk.” You looked down, knowing you didn’t either. “Where were you when Big John went missing? You weren’t there. You weren’t there for John B. You weren’t there for any of us! Remember your kook year?”

“Dude.” JJ tried, again, to stop the argument.

“Yeah, you forgot about us. Now you feel guilty.”

“Give me a break.” She pushed him, and he staggered but held his ground, you and JJ were up within seconds. “Is that what you need? You need a break? Move!”

You and JJ pulled them away from each other, shouting for them to stop, to cut it out. You held Kie’s shoulders, the both of you breathing heavily. She stared straight ahead, holding eye contact with Pope as JJ looked between them.

“If I’m the one mediating, we’ve hit rock bottom.” JJ sighed. You dropped your hands from Kie’s shoulders. She sat down as you sent Pope to the bow of the ship, sitting down as well.

“Pope, we’ll drop you off.” You said, JJ steering the boat. 

--

You sat, facing away from the group, water washing around your ankles, arms propped up on the wood as you stared at your phone. You were aware of the conversation - the gold was gone - but you weren’t really listening, or paying attention. Your mind was plagued with worries that felt trivial compared with what was going on, but still felt like the world would implode if you didn’t sort them.

Tyler was rejecting your refusals, insisting you humour him. You turned around briefly to look at JJ, who was watching you. You wondered if he had worked out that you’d slept with Tyler, even though you hadn’t mentioned it. But, of course, you hadn’t mentioned it - he couldn’t know.

You broke from your thoughts as Pope came blundering down the path. “Guys!” he halted when he reached you, and you picked your legs up, swinging around to face the group. “Oh, God, I ran all the way here.”

“How was the interview?” you asked.

“Don’t ask.”

“Promising.”

“JB, look, I’m sorry dude. About everything.”

“It’s fine.” John B disregarded.

“But - but I don’t have a lot of time, and I have information that is tactically relevant. So, before I had my interview, my dad said he was going down to the private airstrip to cut palms for Cameron’s big plane. Because it was too heavy, it needed a longer landing strip to take off. So, I’m there sitting in my interview, thinking to myself, ‘Hm, why would Cameron need a longer airstrip to take off? What could be so heavy to weigh it down?’”

“Gold.” JJ turned.

“That’s right.” John B confirmed.

“Exactly! Guys, this is our chance, but it leaves tonight, and we have to go.”

“We can’t give up now.” Kie smiled, jumping down from where she was balanced.

“What’s the plan, big man?” JJ asked.

“We’re gonna steal that shit back.” John B stated.

You smiled, this was going to be a shit show.

--

“We go in there, guns-a-blazin’, make Ward Cameron beg for mercy, abscond with as much gold as possible, and vámanos, get the hell out of there.” JJ summed up.

“Send that shit right down the intracoastal.” John B added.

“Wait for the weather.” Kie reminded.

“Exit to Cuba.” Pope finalised.

“Cuba?” JJ sounded offended at the idea, “No, man, Xcalak, the jewel of the Yucatan. Lobsters so thick, mangoes, no word for money.”

“I like the sound of that,” you hummed, sitting up from where you lay across the back seats, “Let’s do this shit.”

The VW rattled on for a few hundred feet, John B curving into a break in the thicket, the lot of you leaping out of the car to a wire fence.

“What’s the plan?” Kie asked. “Broad strokes.”

“I don’t think we got that far.” John B admitted, Pope pulled out his binoculars.

“They’re loading up the gold.” Pope pointed out. 

John B took the binoculars, watching the scene before him. You were all pressed up to the wire fence, and you could see a car rolling up to the plane. You watched the figures exit, faintly recognisable without the binoculars. John B lowered the black instrument, Kie asking him what was going on.

“It’s Sarah.” 

You looked back at the plane. They played out like a scene in a play, little figurines moving around, until Sarah was being dragged onto the plane by the shape that must have been her father. John B disappeared from your side as the engine began to whir, loud enough to be audible from your spot behind the fence. Behind you, a car door slammed, and you shouted for your friend as he started the engine, forcing all of you to step back as he smashed through the gate, JJ’s “Don’t be a hero!” resounding in the air.

Still shouting, the four of you ran through the gap as he accelerated towards the moving plane, your shouts fracturing the air. Upon the realisation that whatever stupid, reckless thing John B was doing couldn’t be stopped, you waited in baited breath. You watched the van swerve in the plane’s path, the screech of the brakes reaching your ears. You heard and watched the second squeal as the plane halted, barely feet away from the pogue.

Somewhere in the distance, you heard the sirens.

“Guys, I can’t get arrested.” Pope spoke, breaking the shocked silence you had been standing in.

“I’m on probation.” JJ added. 

“We’re no good if we’re all in jail.” Kie confirmed, and you turned to the three of them.

“You serious?” you almost laughed.

“Y/N,” JJ started.

“Go, if you have to.” You nodded, “I’ll step in if he needs me, God knows what’ll happen.”

Kie and Pope nodded,setting off, but JJ stood. “You can’t-”

“JJ, you said yourself - you’re on probation. But they don’t know I’m here, I’ll be fine.” You smiled, stronger than you felt, “Go.”

He followed your friends, and you stepped back into the trees, the sick feeling in your stomach foreboding a turn of events. The blue and white police car was racing down the runway, and you could almost feel the panic in your friends.

You saw the Sheriff get out, and the exchange that led to Ward’s arrest. You watched her get him on the floor, gun pointed at his face, you heard a bang.

The scene froze for a second, but suddenly time sped up, the Sheriff collapsed, and there was another figure. The gun was pointed at John B. You felt yourself move forwards, but the figures were moving - Sarah’s crumpling onto the floor, Ward standing, John B’s moving to help Sheriff Peterkin. You watched Ward and the new figure. Fuck it.

“John B!” you screamed, and he looked up. He was sprinting towards you as the three Cameron’s started fighting. You jogged, the pair of you breaking into a sprint as you got to the woods, fighting your way through the thicket as more sirens joined the melee. Shots were fired, but they sounded numb to your racing mind. He was slightly ahead of you, faded hoodie flashing as you both ran flat out. Before you registered the road, the horn was honking and John B was rolling over the bonnet of a car. You grabbed his shoulders, pulling him up, the pair of you running as the driver shouted for you.

You needed to find the others.

You ran for a while, slowing to a walk as you discussed where the others would be. The junkyard, you thought.

After five minutes, you stopped, forcing him to prove to you that the blood on his arms was only Peterkin’s, and that he wasn’t injured.

Somewhere above you, there was a plane. 

You were walking slowly now, approaching the junkyard. You felt numb, knowing that everything was completely different now. You turned the corner, seeing the three other pogues gathered, Pope taking a hit from JJ’s juul. Weird.

They ran to you, seeing the blood in John B’s hands and your shirt (from your attempts to check his injuries) and immediately began to panic, giving you once overs.

“Who’s blood is that?”

You all ducked behind the clutter to avoid the approaching sirens, allowing yourself a moment to breathe. You glanced at the blonde boy next to you, but as you went to speak, he turned away harshly. What the fuck?

Tags: @tangledinsparkles​ @jellyfishbeansontoast​ @lolitstiana​ @ilikealotofpeople-younotsomuch​ @teamnick​ @thoughtsofthestars​ @obxmxybxnk​ @jjmaybankswife​ @kaelyn-lobrutto24​ @sxcretinhuman​ @alexa-playafricabytoto​ @angvelics​ @badwolf00593​ @coloradogirl07​ @mendesmaybank​ @jiaraendgame​ @5am-cigarette​ @emerald-xcd​ @haharudy​

[fangirlofbooksandpasta]

One Morning (Part 1/2)

Part 2

Pairing: (Post Azkaban) Sirius Black x reader (I tried to write it without a gender or skin colour or size in mind, but sorry if I have moments where it slipped)

Warnings: a small amount of angst? 2261 words? None really I think. 

Summary: On a calm morning you wake up to a shoking newspaper, and when memories flood your mind, you decide to take action. 

Note: This is for @im-a-writer-right​‘s 2k followers writing challenge! Congratulations! None of the prompts I chose are in this but they’re going to be in part 2 when i write that one. If anyone has any feedback, please write a comment or send me a message, I appriciate it all! Sorry for any spelling or grammar mistakes, English isn’t my first language and the time is currently 2345

PS. I have used a part from Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban, chapter 3. I do not own the rights to this, I merely use it for the purpose of this fanfiction. All the credit for this passage goes to J.K. Rowling. Please dont sue me. 

The dust was sparkeling like little stars in the morning light as you lied in the soft bed. You slowly awakened with your cat, Freya, coming closer to you before she cuddled against your duvet cover. With eyes closed you petted her soft fur with a tired hand as she purred in content. The moment passed and you got up from the covers, much to Freya’s displeasure. With slow steps you made your way to the small kicthen to pour yourself a glass of water, which you drank while you looked at the little street from your flat. The café opposite your building was opening up, already with a few customers at the tables outside. The weather was wonderful, not to hot with a light breeze. The people at the café were wearing overcoats and scarfs but nevertheless looked incredibly comfortable and cozy in the august weather. Freya jumped up on the counter and sat almost next to you, looking at the street too as if she understood it all. Maybe she did.

You became starteled when your small transformer owl, Hermod, jumped inside from the window you were just looking out of. Freya jumped down from the counter and found a sunny and warm spot in the living room where she lied down for a morning nap. She had been playing and exploring the flat the night before, so she was probably tired. You smiled to yourself before you turned your attention to Hermod, who carried a copy of The Daily Prophet and a letter.

‘Thank you, Hermod,’ you said as you took the post from him and gave him a little snack as pay for his work. He was a very small owl, as transformer owls are, but he did a great job for his size. He was hard to catch, small, and fast – and insanely cute. Hermod hopped away while you looked at the front page of The Daily Prophet. It was the first time you had read it in a couple of weeks because your work for The Order had taken up your time. You absolutely knew how essential it was that you followed the news and how the ministry dealt with everything. But nothing could’ve prepared you for the headline you were faced with:

BLACK STILL AT LARGE Sirius Black, possibly the most infamous prisoner to ever be held in Azkaban fortress, is still eluding capture, the Ministry of Magic confirmed today. ‘We are doing all we can to recapture Black,’ said the Minister for Magic, Cornelius Fudge, this morning, ‘and we beg the magical community to remain calm.’ Fudge has been critisied by some members of the International Federation of Warlocks for informing the Muggle Prime Minister of the crisis. ‘Well, really, I had to, don’t you know,’ said an irritated Fudge. ‘Black is mad. He’s a danger to anyone who crosses him, magic or Muggle. I have the Prime Minister’s assurance that he will not breathe a word of Black’s true identity to anyone. And let’s face it – who’d believe him if he did?’ While Muggles have been told that Black is carrying a gun (a kind of metal wand which Muggles use to kill each other), the magical community lives in fear of a massacre like that of twelve years ago, when Black murdered thirteen people with a single curse.

Your breath came to a stop when you had processed every last word. You stared into the air, not really seeing what was happening in front of you. Freya had noticed the silence and made her way back to the counter. She was purring loudly as she stroked your arm with her body. But you hardly noticed. A blizzard of thoughts ran through your mind. Memories, feelings. Everything that you had long ago hidden in the corners of your mind rushed up as if a tornado raged in your head.

Your trance was awaked by the sound of the parchment letter hitting the hard kitchen floor. Freya looked innocently at the letter and back at you as if she tried to convince you that she wasn’t to blame, although you knew differently. Still unsetteled, you stroked her fur as you unfolded the letter with shaky hands. You recognised the handwriting as your good friend Remus’s.

Hello Y/N, I’m sure that you’ve read the news – can we meet soon to talk about it? I’m sure we could both use it. All the best, Remus Lupin.

You put the letter down in front of you, on top of the newspaper. Freya looked concerned at you and you could hear Hermod from the other room, also sounding concerned abour the sudden silence that fell over the flat.

‘Don’t worry, Honey,’ you whispered as you petted Freya. She closed her eyes and the concerned look on her furry face changed into one of love and enjoyment as she purred in delight. Hermod stopped his complaining and went on to enjoy the snack you had rewarded him. While you were standing in the kitchen with a million different thoughts racing through your mind, one certain memory took the front seat.

The sun was setting in the distance, way behind the mountains and forests. Sirius’s arm was resting around your shoulder as you rested your head against his own shoulder. Tired from the exams and the circus that was school the two of you had gone outside to relax in the calming presence of each other. It was the last year and everyone knew that Voldemort was rising and that it, sooner or later, would lead to some kind of a war. Everyone knew that there would be losses, great ones. Painful ones. But for that moment there was bliss. A breeze russteled Sirius’s hair and you nuzzeled closer to him. He sighed a tired sigh and closed his eyes in an effort to enjoy nothing but your body against his own. Something he enjoyed greatly, but knew there wouldn’t be much time for when you finished your time at Hogwarts and were forced to face the brutality of the real world.

‘Are you ok?’ he asked in a quiet whisper, as if it pained him to speak the words. You turned to face him and were met by a concerned but yet caring face. You smiled sadly at the question and turned to look back upon the landscape. The quiet water. The still mountains. Absolutely unbothered by the ongoing conflicts in the world and only slightly disturbed by the breezes.

‘I honestly don’t know. I’m anxious and I feel like I’m waiting for something. But I don’t know what it is that I’m waiting for,’ you said quietly. Sirius leaned closer to you and kissed the top of your head, gaining a small smile from you.

‘Whatever happens Y/N,’ he started and paused. Once again you turned to face him. He looked at you with worry in his eyes before he finished his sentence; ‘I will always love you.’

You finally decided on what to do; first things first you went to the bedroom and found a piece of parchment and a quill.

Hello Remus, I’m going to his house. You know where. Y/N.

Hermod was had long ago finished the piece of meat when you entered the living room of the flat with the small letter in your hand. He knew what he had to do and without protesting let you. You instructed him to fly to the Burrow when he had done his duty, and when the letter was fastened securely, Hermod flew out of the open window. Quietly you followed him with your eyes before he was nothing but a black spot far away.

You yourself got dressed in a loose, white dress shirt and some black trousers. The august weather was still colder than what was preferable, so you put on a scarf that Molly had knitted for you years ago, along with a dark brown coat. You packed a bag of necessities before you went sat down in the couch next to where Freya was resting peacefully. She raised her head when the couch was weighed down by you. The cat carrier bag was placed next to you and Freya knew what she had to do.

‘I’m sorry, I know you don’t like it, but I don’t want to leave you alone,’ you quietly said as Freya made herself comfortable in the carrier. She sounded a little meow as an answer to your remark. You stood up, bags in hand and over your shoulder. A small checklist was crossed in your head as you made sure that you had everything you needed. A loud noise sounded and soon you appeared on Grimmauld Place. The slight breezes were still present. You looked around and before you was 11 and 13. In the cracks of the pavement small flower weeds grew in yellow and purple colours. You picked a couple, gathering a small bouquet. With a quick movement of your wand, number 12 appeared between 11 and 13 – an apparent mistake the muggles merely laughed at.

The house stoof before you. Suddenly you were filled with dread although you knew that Walburga and her husband were long gone. You had only visited Grimmauld Place 12 once or twice, but the house’s energy was comepletely off. Everyone could feel it radiating evil, and not having been there in ages you felt as if it was stronger than ever. Whether it was the impacts of the words from The Daily Prophet, or your own imagination and feelings tricking you, you didn’t quite know.

‘Here we go,’ you whispered to yourself as you took the steps towards the door you opened slowly.

The scent that immidiately hit your face as you closed the door was both recogniseble and not. The few memories you had of the place filled the screen in your head. As you looked around, you noticed how the dust was flying in the room in which you had entered. Paintings had been covered up. Bookshelves looked as if they were going to break the moment somebody touched them. You sat down the bag and Freya when you noticed a piece of parchment on a credenza. It was yellowed – old.

Calla,

A big smile formed on your face and a warmth spread in your heart when you read the first word. The nickname he had given you when you were still at Hogwarts.

You walked into the Gryfindor common room with a glass of water and flowers in it. Careful not to spill it, you made your way around the furniture. The room was empty for people, everyone being at Hogsmeade and the first and second years yet at brunch. You had snuck outside for a moment of peace before the castle would vibrate with curious 11 and 12 year olds, who still had loads to explore.

‘Calla,’ you heard a familiar voice say when you reached the entrance to the girl dormitory. You turned your head around and saw Sirius Black standing at a window.

‘What?’ you asked confused. You knew him – not well, but enough to know the very basics. His group of friends, James, Peter, Remus, and he himself, was well known. Especially in the Gryfindor house. Your best friend Lily always talked about how irritating James and his friends were. But even though you were only thirteen, you could hear that even though Lily found James incredibly annoying, she also at times enjoyed his company.

‘The name of the flowers,’ Sirius answered. You looked at the flowers. They were like small glasses or cups, mixes of pink and white with strong, dark green stems. Beautiful and robust, you thought to yourself.

‘I find them quite beautiful, thought I’d put them on my desk and enjoy them until they wither,’ you said and again turned to look at Sirius. He walked closer to you. You weren’t shy around him, although you did find him very handsome.

‘Do you know what the Greek meaning of “calla” is?’ he asked. You shook your head.

‘No, I don’t,’ you answered. Sirius smiled and walked close enough to smell the flowers.

‘Then I’ll let you figure it out on your own,’ he said and walked out of the common room.

Confused and wondering you made your way up the stairs to your dorm. The flowers looked refreshing on the wooden desk and although they didn’t survive too long, you enjoyed them while they lasted. A week later you asked Professor McGonagall if she knew the Greek meaning of “Calla”.

‘Most beautiful, if I remember correctly.’ She answered.

And you didn’t sleep for a week.

I figured you’d be the first one to come here. Nobody knows about this place – only the Order, as you probably remember. Is the order still active? I hope it is – at least, it should be. I’m in Hogsmead. I won’t be more precise than that in case anyone else reads this. You will recognise me when you see me. Love, Sirius Orion Black.

You turned to look at Freya, who was lying in the carrier with her eyes open as if she analysed your every movement. You walked back to her and petted her calmly.

‘Sorry girl, I have to do it again. I know you don’t like it, but I promise it’ll be the last time for a while.’ You said as you picked her carrier and your packed bag up again. The small bouquet of flowers was in your hand and before you could count to three, you were in Hogsmeade.

@beksib​

[tsumusamu]

asks :D

sorry i took so long to answer these! i just put them in one post so i wouldn't spam too much

Um I read both your series recently and I just wanted to tell you omg I love them so much I couldn’t put down my phone I got so invested into it and if it’s not a bother if you could add me to the tag list for Amorentia and Call you mine🥺💜👉👈

of course! it’s not a bother! i’m happy to hear you’re enjoying the series! <3

hello, i just want to ask if you have any haikyuu fic recommendations (preferably abt bokuto or atsumu)? Or know any other acct/s that write them? im currently on a fic hunt and i just want some writing that’s as good as yours 🤧

hi there! honestly i havent read many haikyuu fics as of late but alkhale on ao3 is probably my favorite author of all time. they have explicit fics but their rated t fics are just as good. i admire them so much!!

I LOVE UR WRTING omgosh am looking forward to the next part of call you mine SO MUCH u have no idea !!! heheh take ur time will be patiently waitinggg <3 take care!!!

i’m so happy you like my writing it means so much! you take care as well ok <3

My emotions went everywhere!! can you add me to the Call you mine taglist please?😆

Of course!

Omg omg omg I really enjoyed the most recent chapter of ‘call you mine’!! I know you were stressed about writing/publishing it but GIRLL IT WAS AMAZING AND HEART-WRENCHING - and it was a great read! Keep up the awesome work, and I’m looking forward to seeing reader and Atsumu’s interactions in the future like UGH MY HEART. PLEASE, YOU LOVE BLINDED IDIOTS. Take care, lovely!! <3 stay healthy and get some good many hours of sleep! :)) 

GLAD THAT YOU ENJOYED IT!! yes i dont think it was my best work but i will do my best to keep writing in the future! they are such idiots that i felt myself cringing so hard while writing LOL </3 i will take care of myself and i hope you do too!!!

can I be tagged in the next update of Call you mine? 

yes!

you are such a talented writer and i just love “call you mine”. i saw that you apologised for making part 4 12k words long, but honestly write as much as you want to bc we all need as much of this series as we can get. (btw i saw that you said you don’t know when you’ll post the next update, but i kid you not when i say that i’ll check your blog daily to see if you’ve posted another part of the series and to check our your other content as well 🤭) 

YES HAHA sorry i do get really long winded sometimes hence the huge chapter that i posted a few weeks ago LOL the last chapter will be even longer so prepare for that....... sorry abt my inconsistency that i cant tell you when i’ll update next but thank you for being so patient and supportive!!

could i be added in the taglist of both atsumu fics 🥺

yup!

i am speed

and would love to be added to your general taglist whenever you update any of your fics!! thanks🤍

of course! <3

can i be tagged for the call you mine 🥺 

yes i’ll tag you :)

i’m in love with the hogwarts haikyuu au! i think it’s an amazing idea that needs more stories

ME TOO ANY HOGWARTS AU HAS ME GOING INSANE I THINK IT’S ONE OF THE MOST ENTERTAINING AUS TO BOTH READ AND WRITE. i will definitely be writing more hogwarts haikyuu in the future!!

i forgot to add to that last post that what you’re writing is wonderful and amazing and can’t wait for part 4!

thank you so much for your support!

call you mine is such a masterpiece, you’re such an amazing fucking writer (like the plot and everything???? GENIUS) and i can’t wait for the next update sndnkejdh 

AHHH ANON thank you im so happy that you liked call you mine uiefdiasifua im currently working on the update rn thanks for being patient!!

Hi i was the ao3 reader who discovered you and wanted to drop by and say i am sooo excited to read your latest chapter!!! i also wanted to say I love LOVE major love your hogwarts au fic! idk if you know james potter but you probably do seeing as you made an au but atsumu reminds me soo much of young james potter!! i read some fics of james potter and i find him and atsumu so alike in a a way i would love if you could do more takes on your hogwartsau!!! i could send you the links if you want!!

OMGJOIJAI I hadnt even thought of it that way?? now that you mention it james and atsumu in my story do seem to have some similarities but i hope i didnt make atsumu too much of a dickhead D: i will definitely be writing more for hogwarts haikyuu!

can i mayhap get added to your general taglist? your writing is AMAZING, never fails to send me into the stratosphere from how good it is.

sure thing! i’m happy you’re enjoying my work thank you for your message <3 pls dont stay too long in the stratosphere though it’s kinda hard to breathe up there LOL

hiii!!! can you please add me to call you mine taglist?? 

for sure!

IM SO EXCITED FOR PART 5 OF CALL U MINE AHHHHHHHHH

I HOPE IT WILL LIVE UP TO YOUR EXPECTATIONS!!

Hello!!! Can I please be added to the Amortentia and Call you Mine taglist please? ❤️❤️ I think about them all the time, Atsumu brain rot for life!

Also super hyped for your upcoming Osamu fic! You’re amazing, I hope you’re not too stressed! Stay hydrated and get enough sleep you wonderful human being ✨✨✨❤️❤️

YES OF COURSE U CAN AND ATSUMU BRAINROT FOR ME 24/7 AS WELL. i hope i’ll be able to finish that osamu fic soon aaa thank you for being patient <3 please take care of yourself as well!

Will ch.5 be the last chapter of Call You Mine?

yes!

i just wanna say 'call you mine' is 10/10. your writing? *french kiss* i love how you go into detail - we see both atsumu's reader p.o.v - it gives depth to the characters! it's so realistic too. reader's hesitance is very valid - like how can you be sure of atsumu's feeling, when he's getting his dick wet everyday LOL! thank you for writing this, i am enjoying it so much! <3

HDSUUFHASUHF ANON PLS AHHH IM SO HAPPY THAT UR ENJOYING IT and also atsumu will get his dick wet one last time in the final part... u will see ;)

HELLO AMORTENTIA AND CALL YOU MINE ARE SO NICE im gonna cry my favorite tropes + one of them is a hogwarts!au + your writing 🥺❤️

HELLO HELLO THANK U FOR READING MY WORK!!!

i can’t wait for part 5 of call you mine. this series of yours is literally so GENIUS

i really hope that it will be satisfying!! thank you for your kind message!

I wanted to say that your writing is absolutely perfect. The way you capture these characters I’m truly speechless, and each chpt it just gets better and better 😭😭💛 could I ask to be added to the call you mine taglist? Truly, thank you for ur amazing writing !!!! 😭

AHHHH IM LITERALLY BLUSHING... THANK YOU FOR THE COMPLIMENTS IM T___T yes of course you can be added to the taglist and thank you for reading my work!

ALSO YOUR TAKE ON TSUMU IS GOLDEN. IT IS CLASS. PERFECTION. GRACE. I CANT EVEN EXPLAIN. Anywayz CATCH ME CRYING OVER CALL YOU MINE TSUMU AND Y/N 🥲😭💛

PLS ATSUMU IS MY FAVORITE CHARACTER I ABSOLUTELY LOVE WRITING MY TAKE ON HIM. IM HAPPY TO HEAR THAT YOURE ENJOYING THIS TSUMU. AND YES... CALL YOU MINE TSUMU AND Y/N LITERALLY DRIVE ME CRAZY THEY R SO DUMB BUT I CRY WHILE WRITING THEM

Hi there! I love your Call You Mine atsumu x reader fic so much, it’s so well written! Would it be possible for me to be added to the taglist please?

thank you! and yes you can be added!

hi, just caught up with call you mine! i know this might be an odd comment on it but i'm currently going through a similar situation with my best friend as reader is (gray area, we haven't talked in a while) and reading both of their perspectives really brought me comfort. anyway thank you for writing it :)

ooo wow :O i really hope the situation you’re in gets resolved soon im wishing you good luck!! im happy that my writing was able to give you comfort <3 thank you for reading and supporting my writing!

your video edits are just *chefs kiss* my friends and I have been laughing at them for days in our gc and have even inspired memes of our own 😅 hope to see more them, they’re too good istg sending you love from three art school kids from Europe 🥺💕✨

??!#())(!@ OMG HAHAHA i would love to see some of the memes you guys came up with LOL sending love right back at you <3

hi love !! can i be added your gen tag list if you have one?

yes, i’ll add you!

Hello! Sorry for the bother but I’m suck a HUGE fan of your smau! And I’m talking about “Call You Mine” it’s so good and depressing...but that isn’t the point! I know you are busy with something else but I would like to ask if it’s be alright if I made a small fic about that story? If not, that is completely fine and understandable!

Thank you for your time and cya next time!!

yup yup that series comes with an angst tag for a reason! you’re not being a bother don’t worry! i would prefer for no fics to be made based off of the story, i’m sorry :( but thank you for asking!

I just discovered your blog and I love your writing so much.

I was wondering if I could be added to the tag list for call you mine with atsumu x reader? This story hurts me so much and it's written so well.

Thank you and have a nice day 🧡

hi! thank you for supporting my writing! yes you can be added to the taglist and im sorry it hurts </333 hope you have a nice day too bb

When do you think the next part of amortentia will be up? It’s my favorite series 😫 (no rush though!!!!)

hmmm im really not sure unfortunately :(

Sorry to bother, but I literally went through every part of Call you Mine just now AND I LOVE EVERY BIT OF IT. Oh my goodness it hurts how much I love it. The friendship and the unspoken love for each other that leads to a long yearning for each other is literally my fanfic bread and butter. ITS SO DARN GOOD and I felt like I needed to tell you that. Anyways, I hope you are having an amazing week, you’re taking care of yourself, you’re safe and healthy! Thank you for what you do! 🤗

IM SO HAPPY TO HEAR THAT YOU LOVE IT. GENUINELY. KNOWING THAT PEOPLE ARE ENJOYING MY WORK MAKES ME SMILE SO BIG. THANK YOU FOR TELLING ME YOUR THOUGHTS. please take care yourself as well, and thank you for your ask!

Hi! I recently saw your atsumu x reader fic on ao3 (Call you mine) and I haven't read it yet but I've seen others talk about it on tumblr so I was wondering if I could be added to a tag list for that fic (if you have one ofc). Feel free to ignore this ask if you don't have one or it's full!

yes i can add you the taglist! i hope you’ll enjoy the fic whenever you decide to read it! <3

[voidlitmoon]

Familiar Faces, Connected Stories

So.... I am very late to posting it here XD sorry sorry, I kept forgetting, but its here! Finally we get to see the stinky trash man and slimey boi! Or at least partially

See with this part taking so long this part is going to be split into two CHAPTERS! Dont worry I made sure it left off at somewhere where it would make sense. Anyways @sugarglider9603, on with the show!

Ao3 link

Ao3 series link

Part 4 Part 5 (chapter 2)

Master Post

Words: 2,070

Summery: ' Virgil leaned back and stared curiously at his teammates, instinctively sliding a paw in front of his brothers, surprising the two. From their past prospective, Virgil always stayed back, uncomfortable with any form of pokemon battles. Yet here the youngest was, defending the two against pokemon he seemed to trust. Trust? Did he not?

The two Eevees shared a glace, one thing running in both their minds

was it possible to get their brother back? '

 

It's time we brought our good ol trash rat and slimey boi into the story

Well trash Eevee and.. ok Deceit is still a slimey boi but they're also here!

Chapter 1

Thomas stirred the boiling pot beneath a slowly darkening sky, making sure to watch the food so nothing burned. He wasn't the best at cooking, but he'd learned enough to make some food when stuck in the woods, and having a Logan helped quite a bit. 

"Hey!" He stumbled a bit as Roman crashed into his leg, the Eevee chasing Patton around. Roman shook his head, chirped up a sorry before going back to the chase. Thomas shook his head fondly, returning his gaze to the cooking stand "be careful guys, Virgil keep an eye on them" Patton and Roman cried out at Thomas' distrust,  but continued playing anyways as Virgil watched laying by the table.

After some time, Virgil occasionally snapping at Roman, Thomas was nearing down with the stew when crashing and yelps caught his attention. He whipped his head up just to see Roman and Virgil tangled together, the table fallen onto its side and the finished berry skewers astray across the ground. Patton ran over, sniffing as the two untangled themselves from each other. Thomas groaned.

"That's it! Patton, you're going to stay right next to me, Virgil and Roman, you're going out and getting us more berries" all three cried out as Logan shook his head from Thomas' shoulders.

"You two, don't even try. Virgil, I need you to keep an eye on Roman so he doesn't run off. And don't try me, I remember that giant pile of Oran berries you brought us" Virgil grumbled, hissing a bit at Roman before leading the way out of the clearing circle. Patton walked over, glumly laying down over Thomas feet. Thomas sighed, he could pick the table up later he supposed, focusing on the pot once again.

Not noticing the two pairs of eyes watching.

Eevee flicked his tail, the uniquely marked pokemon correctly predicting and stifling his brother's angry huff once again. Even with this action, he could understand his partner.

Because he was right there, right there! Their Eevee brother was walking away with another Eevee, telling the brown furred pokemon ('Roman' he believed) off for getting him mixed up in the other's mess. And then there was the trainer.

Eevee glared at the smiling human, stirring a large delicious smelling pot, two more Eevees laying on him. If it wasn't for their brother always being around the human or the other pokemon, they couldn't have gotten him back a while ago. Yet, they had learned their lesson after the chase, the marked Eevee stifling his own growl at the light gray Eevee laying at the trainer feet. If it wasn't for him especially, he remembered the day they almost got their smallest back.

"Please" his brother whined quietly "he's alone with just one of the Eevees, if he saw us he would help! Can't we just go get him now?" He shot a sympathetic look at the other Eevee, understanding his pain. The trash covered pokemon always had a bit of a stronger connection, not much but something more, as he was the one to find the small one in a dumpster. The other shuffled closer and he rapped a tail around his non blooded brother, keeping him close.

"No, you remember how strong, what was he called? Patton was, and you see how often they train. We wouldn't stand a chance" the other's ears lowered.

"I.. I just want him back" the other murmured, ducking his head into his fur, the cleaner of the pair giving a reassuring lick back.

The two jolted as they were brought back to reality, only realizing too late how loud they began to speak as a gray head poked through the bush they were hiding within.

The three Eevees stared at each other for only a moment before the marked Eevee leapt up, standing defensively between his friend and the pet, letting out a low growl. Its eyes merely blinked behind glasses before brightening.

"Oh! It's you!" Patton exclaimed, from the sound of it his tail swishing back and forth rapidly "whatcha doing here?" The tail swishing suddenly stopped as the shiny glared "you aren't here to try and steal Virgil away again, are you?"

The protective Eevee pushed the other behind him a bit, signaling to run, but the trash loving Eevee didn't budge. He sent a look back at the other, only to see the pokemon completely petrified. Oh right, last time they came in contact with Patton he knocked him out nearly immediately.

The shiny seemed to notice, blinking away the anger from his eyes "are you hungry? We wouldn't mind you joining us for dinner, if you wanted!" 

And now the marked Eevee froze, yet in confusion. Did.. he just offer food to them? With a trainer no less? He was about to protest when his stomach betrayed him.

Patton perked as the marked Eevee used his tail to bring his brother forward, keeping him close ".. I guess free food would be a stupid thing to pass up" Patton giggled before his head dissapeared as he ran back to the trainer.

"Wait" the trashy Eevee stopped him, "What are you doing? We, we can't-" "I know, but" the smaller yet protective Eevee hesitated "we, we might be able to see him again" the other looked down. This could be their only safe chance, heck the moment they see him the trainer might run them off. The realization they may not be able to be with their youngest brother again hit both hard, but at least seeing him, whether forced to stay with the trainer or (somehow) happy with his place, at least they would know.

The non blooded brothers looked at each other one last time before nodding, making their way through the bush.

Thomas kept a half an eye on Patton as he turned off the camping stove set MJ gave him, walking over with Logan still laying over his shoulders and picking up the knocked over mini foldable table. He went to pick up the dirty berry skewers when a chirp behind him caught his attention.

"So, what were you looking at Pat-" Thomas stood and turned around, only for Logan to let out a deep grown from his shoulders and surprise from himself.

"So" Thomas smiled, crossing his arms "we meet again" the two Eevees moved cautiously into view, Patton leading. He remembered these Eevees from a couple of months ago, yet he didn't think he'd be followed.

Patton chirped happily, running up to Thomas and nodded to the skewers. Thomas raised an eyebrow "you.. want then to join us for dinner?" Pattom chirped again, rising up onto his hind legs and pawing up in an honestly adorable manner. Thomas smiled, petting Logan's head to calm his fur.

"Alright, if they help us clean this up, they can join" The two Eevees seemed surprised by the news, but after Thomas explained where to put them, they rushed forwards to help.

With their help everything finished up quite quickly, Thomas starting a fire once again for when Roman and Virgil returned back. Virgil.

The trainer was now sitting in a camping chair, Logan still giving him a look of 'how dare you let these hooligans near my son and husband again', but Thomas blatantly ignored him, instead focusing on poking at the fire as Patton and the dirt covered Eevee rolled around, they one with marks around it's eye lazily watched the fire a few feet away from Thomas. He stole some glances at the strangers but inevitably realized they would commit no harm.

Though something, something was bugging him.

He sighed, dropping the stick some inches from the fires edge and leaning back in his chair, all the Eevees halting in their action and looking to the trainer as he huffed.

"Sometimes, I hate language barriers" he muttered, causing four heads to tilt, making the trainer chuckle.

"Well, I know you two tried to steal Virgil from us, you probably know him from somewhere" he waved at the wild Eevees "the only thing I don't know is, well, why" Patton and Logan perked in interest, as if realizing they never thought to think of that.

At that moment, the bushes started to shake.

______________________________

 

Virgil slightly winced as he picked up a falling Pecha berry, placing the berry back onto the pile. Originally the two were pulling the giant leaf topped of berries together, but berries kept rolling off, and with Roman really being the one punished, Virgil got the easy job.

 

Roman stopped for breathing break, panting slightly "c'mon Bluk Berry, please switch?" In response Virgil grabbed a Bluk berry and tossed it at Roman's face when he wasn't looking, getting a sad and insulted hiss back "nope, you got me into this, you get to do the labor Princey" Roman dropped his ears glumly "calm down you Drama Vespiquen, we're literally almost back" the idiot he called his boyfriend perked up at that, grabbing the leaf's strong stem and pulling backwards.

 

Not long afterwards they reached their final obstacle, Virgil making his way to the front and pulled the branches off to the side to make a clear path. As Roman dragged it through the same damn Pecha berry was knocked off the top, bouncing down to the ground. The dark furred Eevee huffed at it, letting the starter pass through before paddling forward and picking it up. No way he was going to leave a Pecha behind again.

 

He sighed, turning around and ducking his head, his slightly longer ears straight (or as straight as possible) back as he pushed through the bush. Seriously, why did they pick this way to come back as well, they could have moved anywhere and they came back the difficult route. He pushed his way through, his body escaping the bush only to bump right into the berry pile. Honestly it was a miracle nothing fell.

 

He placed the Pecha berry down, making his way around the pile "Roman, what the fu-" he stopped dead.

 

Roman stood in a defensive position, low growls escaping his throat. Patton perked up by a newly set fire, Logan glancing over from Thomas' lap. And then..

It

It couldn't be

He brushed against Roman, eyes wide as two pokemon he thought he would never see again stared back. Puzzle pieces he accidentally lost, ones he looked for for so long before accepting defeat.

 

One stepped forward, the stink from his fur not pleasant, but it wasn't horrible. It felt familiar in fact. The Eevee took a deep breath, before

 

"hey Little Trash" the Eevee smiled, surprisingly still in one place "did you miss us?"

 

The answer was given with Virgil tackling said sticky Eevee, purrs rolling out like a thunderstorm "its you!"

 

His brother laughed, quickly switching back to his chaotic playful nature and snapped up at the smaller, rolling them around.

 

"Hey! What about me?" The two tumbled apart, Virgil nearly bouncing up and, without noticing the completely confused gazes coming from Thomas, Logan, Roman, and Patton, bolted strait into the strangely marked Eevee, cuddling deep into the parental and brotherly figure, breathing in the long lost familiar scent. The trashy Eevee crashed into the pair, thankfully not knocking them over, joining the three Eevees into a long lost family hug.

 

It was something Virgil missed, the two scents were like a comfortable blanket, rapping around himself leaving all his worries outside. He didn't want to confront Thomas or the other, he didn't want to know if they would stay or not, Virgil just wanted to be here with them, and unbelievable, he was. He finally found half of his family he lost, he wouldn't lose them again.

 

Unfortunately though, time still existed, a attention grabbing cough came from Thomas crashing reality back down on the trio, the crackling of fire, the wind blowing through the trees

and the low growls coming from two of the other Eevees.

 

Virgil leaned back and stared curiously at his teammates, instinctively sliding a paw in front of his brothers, surprising the two. From their past prospective, Virgil always stayed back, uncomfortable with any form of pokemon battles. Yet here the youngest was, defending the two against pokemon he seemed to trust. Trust? Did he not?

 

The two Eevees shared a glace, one thing running in both their minds

was it possible to get their brother back?

[kinktae]

How dare you bitchin!jungkook ?! HOW DARE YOU ?!

very NOT spoiler free bitchin’ 8 asks under the cut

Y/N SUPPORT GROUP

deliciouslydisturbed365 said: I just read chapter 8 and holy fuck I’m nauseous. Poor Y/N 😭

queen-emon said: What the literal FUCK man, I just read Bitchin 08 and like im so broken. I never ever consider Y/n and I to be the same person but this time I felt like we were the same person both getting our hearts crushed by the man we loved so dearly. I AM NOT OKAY WHAT THE HELL DID YOU DO TO ME! THIS IS SO NOT GROOVY :(

Anonymous said: Me🤝y/n Repressing our emotions

madjammil said: I am legit crying. Poor y/n! I cannot believe Jungkook slept with Kiri! My heart is broken. I thought these two were finally getting together and he goes and does this dumb shit! Smh. Aside from that, your writing was amazing as always! I love this series so much!

YARA BULLY JK PETITIONERS

Anonymous said: omg i can’t believe jungkook is rly going to get his dickie chopped off 😍😍😍 deserve! can’t wait until yara finds out

Anonymous said: Ignore jk, y/n!!! Gosh she deserve so much better than a fboi who only cares about how he feels physically!! Ahole to the max and I need her to slap him! Yara can join along the slapping game!! But srsly he needs to learn his words alone can’t mend this and I hope y/n doesn’t give in so easily cuz he deserves cold shoulders from her for a very long time and don’t just rely on charms to get his way. Ik he was trouble from the start 😔 y/n dear don’t worry you deserve better

casualxexistence said: So 👉👈 um like is there like ANy chance that we get to see our baby yara’s reaction to this 🥺🥺🥺👼 bc um well I would kinda love to see her hand both jk and kiri there asses bc they aren’t gonna hAVE ANY AFTER SHE FINISHES WITH THEM RIP

Anonymous said: dude, what if y/n hooks up with tae and starts beef between jk and him while yara bitch slaps kiri….. dude bitchin’ has such good drama theories wtf literally anything is possible at this point

Anonymous said: if yara doesn’t punch kook can I punch him? Not as the oc I meant like me BECAUSE WHAT THE FUCK

forvever-ddaeng said: I keep rereading this last part like it’s somehow gonna change or it won’t make me sad the more I read it but it’s having the opposite effect and now I want Yara to beat Jungkook’s ass smh

Anonymous said: WTFFFFFFF YARA GONNA HUNT DOWN AND KICK JUNGKOOK ASS FOR HURTING HER BABY

JUNGKOOK ANTIS:

Anonymous said: what the fuck is wrong with bitchin’!jungkook does he think with his dick i wanna kick his ass

Anonymous said: why jungkook would do something like that if he likes y/n? i would be so mad at him too like… isn’t that kind of cheating? he didn’t say if he was back together with his ex but he slept with her so that must mean something, she probably thinks it means something. he was really stupid 

omgtaehyungsmullett said: i know jungkook fucking with me, dammit 😡

Anonymous said: I DONT UNDERSTAND WHY WOULD JUNGKOOK DO THAT WHY

ausjeons said: Jungkook what the fuck!!! I could slap you silly after reading part 8 😪😩

Anonymous said: Team make jk suffer for awhile and then be able to patch things up with the oc 🤝

Anonymous said: I read ch8 last night and this weighed heavily on my mind all day like why is jk such a hoe? Like how could he just sleep with Kiri just like that. I think these children are very confuzzled with their feelings. After he slept with Kiri, did he rush to y/n bc he knew this was the end of their “relationship”? One last passionate banger goodbye 😟 my 💔 broken heart

Anonymous said: I ain’t even sad. I’m full on rage mode. WHO TF GAVE JK THE AUDACITY , THE ABSOLUTE BRAWN TO STICK HIS DICK IN KIRI AND THEN , NOT EVEN A FULL DAY LATER ( cuz yk that would be farrr too gracious ) WITHOUT A WARNING , WITHOUT A FRICKING GOOD MORNING EVEN , GOES TO FUCK OC AND THINKS THAT’S OKAY???? Good to know OC and whatever his relationship was with her was worth less than a nut😒

Anonymous said: i’m actually sad… like wow. i really expected him to go back, i really did. but even though i knew it’d happen, it still hurt, y’know? i think that made it worse; knowing that he’d go back to her in the end… shit’s fucked up, really. great job writing it. i could literally feel the emotion from this one.

Anonymous said: Bitchin ch 8…..oh wow the smut was so nice and fluffy but wtf JJK messed up big time. Honestly I don’t think he deserves oc after this. She deserves someone who isn’t so unsure of his feelings that it takes getting back together with and sleeping with someone else to realise it. If he really liked her, he wouldn’t have slept with Kiri.

Anonymous said: “ArE YOu MAd?” Srsly what brand of clown juice is Bitchin JJK drinking?

Anonymous said: TAE AND Y/N HOES BRO ENTER THE NEW SHIP FUCK JK

cchristinnaa said: Jk really did yn like a pocket pussy huh

Anonymous said: HOW COULD JUNGKOOK OH MY GOOODDDDDDDDDDD literally men aint SHIT….. the part where y/n said you got what you wanted from me🥺🥺🥺🥺 I FELT THAT ugh i love the angst

Anonymous said: Hope jk dieS from jealousy next ch. And regrets it skdhdhd :( jk. Hope they get their sht 2gether soon or im gon 😷😖😭

diortae said: me: *explaining to bitchin 8 jk why he’s a dick for calling Y/N his “pretty girl” immediately after fucking her raw the morning after he slept with his ex* 

jk: well, you know what they say. hindsight is 20/20 

me: KINDA SEEMS LIKE REGULAR SIGHT SHOULD HAVE CAUGHT THAT ONE

Anonymous said: JUNGKOOK IS ABOUT TO MEET THESE FISTS UP CLOSE THATS ON GOD THAT DUMBASS LIMP DICK BITCH REALLY FUCKED UP

Anonymous said: I HATE JJK HES AN ASS FOR GG DOWN ON 2WOMEN HE CAN JUS F HIMSELF RN

Anonymous said: JUNGKOOK IS GONNA GET HIS ASS BEATEN UGHSHHSKDHXJSJ MOTHERFUCKER WHAT? WHAT??? THIS BITCH IS A RIDE OR DIE AND UR GOING AFTER FAKEASS KIRI REALLY? FOR REAL I THOUGHT UOU WERE BETTER THAN THIS BUT NO ALL MEN DO IS LIE LIE LIE

Anonymous said: the way i closed the tumblr app when i saw jungkook saying “kiri came over last night”

Anonymous said: alright we beating jk’s ass @ noon 😤

Anonymous said: WHY WOULD JUNGKOOK DO THAT TO OC LIKE WHAT I AGREE WITH OC HE USED HER AND THAT MAKES ME 😡😡😡😡😡

Anonymous said: BITCHIN PART 8 WTFGGGG MY HEART Do be Hurting . i’m going to beat jungkook up !!!!

betysotelo18 said: It’s been a few minutes since I read part 8 and I can’t stop thinking about what could happen next… the meanwhile F U jeon Jungkook, you did wrong

Anonymous said: NOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!! I CANT 😭 WHAT SHOULD I DO WITH THIS CHAPTER HUUUU JUNGKOOK WTFF BRO…….. my heart is breaking for them. Why can’t they just date already wkxbdbbdjdjdjdjdjdj this is onky misunderstanding right? and thankyou for the new chapter sis hihuhihih💕💕

Anonymous said: im shocked i dunno who i hate more rn you or jungkook. my heart is literally SHATTERED he better fix this or else im traveling to the 80s just to kick his ass 😭🤬

Anonymous said: never want to punch jungkook in the face like i wanna do right now

Anonymous said: JUNGKOOK WHAT THE FUUUUUUUUCK 🤬 for the love of god rose why do u did that to me i wanna die

Anonymous said: ROSE WTF WAS THAT MAN !!! my heart it hurts and like wtf jungpuke!! Why would he do that to reader !! why would he sleep with kiri and then sleep with reader ?!? Like go siekkeksjdjejjejdbehhe i wish i can put in reaction pictures in here

CUTIE PIES

Anonymous said: Omggg thank you so so much for this chapter, for the whole fic. Thank you for sharing it with us. You are a great writter. Seriously! I just love how every chapter is so intense. Not only the smut is amazing but every detail, every action, the whole plot, all of the dialogues. I actually cried at the end I love how I can really feel everything. All the emotions. Ah and they’re so cute!!! But why was JK so weak? Even if that’s what you wanted since the beginning… I thought- BOY WTF??? :’( But seriously this is the type of thing I love, I am WEAK for this. The slow burn, the oblivious idiots that love each other but keep suffering thing. And you write it so well. Your mind!!! Your talent!!! I love it. Thank you, for real ♥♥♥ I’m antecipating the next chapter, but already sad that it’s almost ending :((( I’m gonna miss this a lot. Anyways, take your time, baby. And have a nice day! ♥♥♥ (Sorry for bad english btw)

tinievmin said: ROSE. IM IN PAIN. I FELT THE BREAKUP BETWEEN YN AND JUNGKOOK. IM SO SADDD. But not related to the plot, your writing is ART. You always make it flow so well aND WOW!!! I don’t have enough words to express how much I love your works

AND FINALLY, AN INTELLECTUAL

Anonymous said: kiri is a bitch i said what i said