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#i see people ordering them weekly and it's like
theroguequeenaniki · 11 months
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We just tried Crumbl Cookies for the first time, they were good, but so rich??? Does anyone actually eat a whole cookie at once?? We split them (we had 4) in 1/2 and then that 1/2 by 1/4ths and it was almost too much! Lol. We tried the pumpkin brownie, strawberry cheesecake, chocolate chip, and the honey bun. Luckily in that order cause idk if we'd have made it the other way around they're so sweet! Lol. Our favorite was actually the honey bun surprisingly lol.
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grinchwrapsupreme · 1 year
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i'm not saying this to make any sort of point but as someone who works in canadian theatre, the wga strike is going to have an interesting effect on live entertainment too, like i know multiple people who have lost their jobs or will lose their jobs soon because so much american television is produced here and obviously the iatse union is standing with the wga which it should and i also know that when film crew are out of work like this they often turn to theatre because it's a different local of the same union (and a lot of them started in theatre) and they wind up pushing permits out of work because film crew are usually members which means they get first dibs on all calls even if they don't have much live entertainment experience and even though attitudes in theatre and film are VERY different. And i really really hope the wga gets everything they want, they deserve that and more, but i also hope it happens quickly before young iatse permits get priced out of this city and we get into into another situation like the one right after the pandemic
#when the pandemic hit and live entertainment pretty much died for a few years#most established theatre iatse guys moved into film so when theatre started up again there was this huge crisis#and iatse was so desperate for permits they were literally advertising for them on facebook and weren't requiring advocates or anything#which is a massive fucking deal and also how i got my permit#but it also means theres a ton of experienced film iatse members who aren't averse to jumping ship to a familiar field#and all those new permits who found their opening in that crisis are now in danger of being out of work#in the most expensive city in the country#and as someone who works at a theatre that's labelled a learning theatre by the union (we get all the green permits)#it's going to be very interesting to see what happens next#fortunately we don't pay as well as many of the other venues in the city#but we're more likely to offer steady work#so film guys who want cash will take the jobs at the high paying venues doing dailies and weeklies#and the ones who just want to keep busy will wind up here#i have two very good friends who work for the film union#one decided to take a vacation during the strike (good for her) and the other was let go from star trek and intends to go back to theatre#but knowing the attitude of the well established members and people who got used to film there are going to be Problems#so depending on how long the strike lasts this could actually have some serious ramifications for a lot of people outside of the wga#again i'm not trying to make any sort of point here just getting my thoughts in order in the wake of all these tumblr posts about the strik
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saeraas · 2 years
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the new dlc feels like they are trying to get more fate fans pulled into the game tbh. like it's already regulated to a discord fighter outside of Japan. also unrelated note but it's funny how everyone is blaming majin for manifesting with his Dantes arcade card
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mellowwillowy · 2 months
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𝐒𝐮𝐠𝐚𝐫 𝐃𝐚𝐝𝐝𝐲 𝐭𝐮𝐫𝐧𝐞𝐝 𝐇𝐮𝐬𝐛𝐚𝐧𝐝
Yan! Sugar Daddy who fell in love with you at first sight in the cafe he often visited for his daily to-go coffee. He had seen lots of beauties but you were the first to catch his breath.
Yan! Sugar Daddy who tried to woo you, he tried his best to not scare you and subtly flirt with you. It took him a huge courage to approach you and ask for your number.
Yan! Sugar Daddy who found out you were still just a college student who was most likely to be struggling with financial issues, or so he assumed from how most of the students there were.
Yan! Sugar Daddy who took his time bonding with you before subtly offering an arrangement with you, a mutual arrangement of a sugar relationship. Instead of sex, fancy dates, or a plus one to those higher-ups events, he wanted your company all the time if he could.
You were wary and hesitant but his silver-tongued nature convinced you that this would change your life for the better.
While you were inexperienced in most of it, Yulian made sure to make you feel comfortable about it and him. The weekly allowance and PPM were enough to make you never lift a single finger to work anymore.
The more you spent time with him, the less it felt like an arrangement. It felt like a man treating you with utmost respect while spoiling you with luxuries you would never imagine to have.
But with such great benefits came a great price. You noticed that you had been seeing your friends less because of the attention you had on him.
You noticed the higher-ups never stopped sneering at you for being a commoner or his pet whenever you attended the fancy events with him as his plus one.
You noticed how you had almost less to none freedom, always heavily guarded by what seemed to be his bodyguards. Who was he and why did you even need this sort of protection?
One day you decided to trick his bodyguards with your flat-out white lies so that they'd leave you alone. They did not expect someone like you to ever lie and put them at risk so they left you alone.
All you did was wander around in awe, checking the grand balcony to go to the washroom as normal people would.
Yan! Sugar Daddy who was seething in rage when the bodyguards came to him, tricked by your childish lie. But there was no way something bad would happen with this slight mistake right? You were not his spouse by any means.
But oh did everyone know you were someone he fancied for the first time in his whole life. Part of his brain just tried to look at this mistake in a bright light and it backfired.
Yan! Sugar Daddy who had to be endlessly teased by his great-for-nothing cartel friend. He had to endure the stress of losing you and the risk of not being able to take you back.
It's not like the Drug Lord couldn't help him, it was simply humiliating for him to endanger you by not keeping a close eye on you.
Yan! Sugar Daddy who could track you down in less than a week and ordered a mass slaughter on the faction that imprisoned you. You were not wounded terribly but a wound was still a wound.
Yan! Sugar Daddy was just a confidant to the Drug Lord and an infamous lawyer. You only knew he was a lawyer but never the lurking threat of his other occupation. No wonder he was always wary of his surroundings.
How could someone from such a cold underground world have the heart to fall in love with you? That was what you thought when you woke up to his concerned face.
Weeks passed and it didn't take him so long to propose to you, for you to become his spouse.
"I truly love you, dear. I have never even once seen our arrangement as something strictly business instead." He showed you a velvety box with a diamond ring in it. "I admit, it was not the best approach but I thought I could work my way into your heart while profiting you with all the benefits and luxuries you could have from me."
He swallowed the lump in his throat, "I wanted you to see how capable I am."
Something told you that nothing good would come out of your refusal. And instead, logic swarm into your brain. You had been in an arrangement with him for almost a year already and had never even once felt any hardships.
He was nice to you, downright kind and loving even. He cared for you deeply and wouldn't hurt you in any way. It was your fault that you broke free from the barrier of protection he granted you.
With great fame and luxuries, came all sorts of threats. He wasn't disloyal like those higher-ups. He didn't belittle you like others would. He loved you.
Even if you didn't love him, you knew how great it felt to be loved by him. There was not a single loss from this arrangement which was a marriage, right?
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seouljazzbar · 2 months
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GO WITH IT
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
MARK LEE (이민형)
ABOUT 𓂃 ࣪˖ “have sex with me so I can finish writing this” inspired by this tweet or when mark offers to solve all your problems, it's much better to go with it
WARNING 𓂃 ࣪˖ language, mark is a bit of a slut, 18+ spiderman kiss (you’ll see lmao), allusions to fat cock mark… 😵‍💫, overstimulation, unprotected sex, mark’s name repeated like 78 times (no seriously, it’s up there), reader bent like a pretzel, orgasm denial, this author loves a comma, a pinch of softdom!mark, silly ending
PAIRING 𓂃 ࣪˖ bestfriend!mark x bestfriend!reader
WORD COUNT 𓂃 ࣪˖ 6k
AUTHOR'S NOTE 𓂃 ࣪˖ a little surprise drop for my favorite neo! i guess it's also a wee bit of a belated birthday gift to him :) i skimmed it for typos and stuff but i unfortunately did not edit it the way i should have, sorrryyyyy hope y'all enjoy! omg also reader's room is yu nabi's from the kdrama nevertheless hehehe
Nobody was busier than your best friend, Mark Lee. Between his job, his vibrant social life, and his weekly family dinners, you were lucky to be offered a slot in his schedule. It was always a yes to Mark Lee. Usually.
The last three times Mark had tried to make plans with you were all failed attempts, and the excuses varied each time. There was nothing shameful about the truth, but you just couldn’t bring yourself to tell him that your friendship was being thrown to the backburner while you sloppily attempted to get your life together. He knew all about your small business, taking commissions for art prints and ceramics, but he had no idea how much time and effort went into each piece. Besides, knowing Mark he would offer to help, and that wasn’t going to be of service to you in the slightest. 
All you could do was rot in bed, hoping that something would spark your creative mind to no avail. Frustration was starting to take up every corner of your mind— from the nonstop orders that you couldn’t fulfill, to your supplier raising prices, to the fact that you hadn’t had a good date in two years. You were wound too tight to function, and any minute now you were going to start pulling your hair out in chunks.
The sound of the pin-pad at your door let you know that Mark was about to come barreling through. There were so many times that you’d be in strict creation mode, headphones in at full blast while Mark banged at the door pleading for you to answer; when it started to feel like a normal part of your routine, he just requested the code to let himself in. “Yo!”
Except, this time, none of that was necessary. Your headphones were stuffed in their case on the other side of the room, workstation completely untouched with your multiple projects stacked on top of each other. Despite the custom orders piling up over the last two weeks, you hadn’t had the artistic strength to move forward with any of them. The only thing you could do to  buy yourself a little time was to post a message asking for patience and understanding while you navigate some vague emotional hardship. Realistically, though, it would only buy you another week or so before people would start to get angry. 
“Hi.” Perched on a stool near the kitchen island, eyes locked on the cup of coffee you warmed up seventeen minutes ago, you were out of it.
Mark waved a few inches from your face, trying to get your full attention. “Hello? Earth to ___, are you okay?”
You snapped out of it, looking over at your best friend to see that he was dressed for a night on the town. “Sorry, got a lot on my mind right now.”
White, distressed tank top, loose plaid button-up undone, and his sexiest pair of black jeans. The way the meticulous curls fell around his face, looping around his forehead in a way that feigned boylike wonder. He looked oh so delicious, but you would never tell him that— his ego was big enough for the both of you. “Anything I could help with?”
A stifled chuckle barely reached his ears before you cleared your throat, turning toward him with renewed energy. “No, not really.”
Mark put his phone and keys down on the counter, taking a quick intermission to wash his hands before walking back over to you. He’d never been in your apartment in this way before— an unannounced hangout where you’re clearly just a stop along the way, being so underdressed in his presence. He’d seen you in a swimsuit before, but something about a big shirt and underwear felt far more intimate than the two strips of fabric. “This is like the third time you’ve curved me, if you hate me just say that.”
“Oh, you’re so fucking dramatic. I’m just busy.” You shoved at his shoulder, urging him to take a seat so you wouldn’t feel so awkward with him standing over you. He refused cooly, taking a look around your apartment to make sure you hadn’t been aimlessly rotting since the last time he stopped by.
“Even I'm not that busy. What’s going on?”
“I’ve just…” You sighed heavily, a breath you didn’t even know you were holding in. Talking about everything wrong in your life felt far too heavy, too much to divulge to a friend seemingly just doing a wellness check. “I think I’ve bitten off more than I can chew, and I’ve got all these creative blocks that won’t go away and honestly I just need to be fucked like properly fucked to get my juices flowing again but all of the men worth giving it up to are in hiding.”
Mark stood there, mouth agape in disbelief. He did ask, after all. “Woah.”
“Yeah.” It felt embarrassing to hear laid out like that, but there weren’t too many secrets between you and Mark in the first place. Your sex lives weren’t off limits for discussion, and the two of you had plenty of chats that were NSFW in nature. But blurting out how badly  you needed to be railed? That was a new one.
The silence spoke for itself, apparently. You didn’t want to chance a glance up at him, but you knew that you’d have to say something. Maybe something to cover your ass, let him know that you’re well aware how ‘TMI’ that was. Or even—
“I’ll fuck you.”
You nearly choked on air,“What?!” Now you had no choice but to look at him, scanning the twinkle in his eyes in search of sincerity.
“I’m really good, too.” He took a step towards you, eyes never leaving yours as his hands found home in his shirt pockets. This was a side of Mark you rarely got to see— charming, smooth, confident. There were times, namely on nights out, where you’d get a taste of it, watching him chat it up in some dark corner with the prettiest girl you’d ever laid eyes on. But this, being on the receiving end? Watching his eyes drink you in like sweet tea on a balmy Southern summer afternoon? It was enough to make your heart skip several beats. 
“Mark—”
The smile he cracks at you makes you embarrassed for even considering it. “I’m just messing with you, geez,” Heat takes over your face as you try to hide it from him, palms rubbing at your cheeks as your heartbeat tries to find its resting rate. “Although, given that reaction, maybe I shouldn’t be.”
“Shouldn’t be what?”
“Messing with you. Joking, rather. I can definitely mess with you, if you want,” Running so hot and cold in such a short window of time has you shivering under his gaze, scared to make the wrong move and ruin what you’d beg him for. “Hm? Is that what you want?”
The air is thick with anticipation, nothing but the consistent drip from a ceiling leak as the soundtrack to your staring contest with Mark. He was so close to you in all of his Friday night glory, cologne a cloud around you as the heat from his chest permeated your personal space. You were certain that just one taste, just one night in the throes of passion with a curly haired Mark Lee would solve all of your problems. If you closed your eyes, you could picture it— sweaty bodies intertwined amidst the sweltering heat of your studio after dark, the fanning of his breath in your face as he rocks into you, his strong frame caging you into the bed so all you can focus on is Mark, Mark, Mark! His sighs and whines of pleasure flooding your senses so they’re all you can pay attention to, just his voice and his unrelenting pace as he— “___,” The sound of your name on his tongue snapped you out of your lustful haze. “Offer’s about to expire, baby.”
Mark slipped his jacket off without breaking away from you, dropping it carelessly on the floor while your attention wandered to his arms. He seemed to know exactly what he was doing, crossing his arms against his chest as he awaited your answer. “You’re serious? This isn’t some cruel prank where if I say yes, you’ll tell me it was just a joke?”
“That’s not my idea of a prank, princess, where’s the fun in that?” Mark licked his lips, a faint smirk taking over. “Look, if you’re uncomfortable, we can pretend this never happened,” His fingers ghost along the side of your face, sweetly making their way to your lips. “But if it were up to me? I’d have you seven ways to Sunday all over this apartment.”
That was all you needed to lunge into a kiss with him, throwing him slightly off guard as you practically tossed yourself into his arms. But his lips were ready for you, steaming hot and sopping wet— just the way you like it. The smush of your lips together so suddenly garnered the sweetest moan from him, just enough to tease you of what’s to come. His arms wrapped around your torso like a claw machine, pulling you so flush against him as though he was afraid you’d slip through his fingers. 
Your lips were still tingling as he pulled away to lap kisses against your neck, peppering anywhere his lips could reach. “M-Mark, hmngh.”
It was no secret that Mark had a bit of a reputation in the bedroom, but you never thought you’d witness it firsthand. His hands delved blindly to your legs, hoisting you around his waist so he could move you over to your bed. You almost had a mind to remind him of the three big steps up to your bedroom area, but he was far suaver than you gave him credit for— this wasn’t exactly his first rodeo.
He tossed you on the bed, the slight recoil exhilarating before he was all over you again. “If a proper fuck is what you want…” His kisses had shifted to your chest, lips and tongue sucking in the essence of your skin like he couldn’t bear not to. He was almost more excited than you were, his touch reaching anywhere and everywhere all at once, like he couldn’t get enough of exploring everything you had to offer. It was all starting to feel real as Mark made a move to lift up your shirt and the implication of your best friend seeing you naked caught up with you.
“Wait, wait. We’re gonna see each other naked.”
Mark, with the fabric of your shirt caught in his teeth, stared at you blankly. “Yeah…” 
“Shouldn’t that be weird?”
He rolled his eyes playfully, squeezing at your hip with the hand closest to it. “Maybe, but how do you suggest we fuck then? Through my jeans?” He pulled your body swiftly down the mattress so you could feel how hard he was through your panties. 
“Shut the fuck up, oh, my God.”
“I was trying to before you got all weird and jittery,” Mark made a move for your shirt again, and this time you didn’t fight him on it. The balmy air hit your pert nipples the second they were exposed, and Mark couldn’t stop the gruff  noise that formed in his throat. “Just as pretty as I imagined.” You squirmed at the compliment, cheeks heating up at the sight of him drooling over you. “Like that? Hm? Are you my pretty girl?” 
His lips wrapped around the peak of your breast, tongue swirling to the same pattern his thumb and forefinger followed on your other nipple. “Yes!” It was embarrassing, how fast you succumbed to his commands. He struck with confidence, maneuvering his way around your body like he’d done it before. “I’m your pretty girl.”
“So sexy saying that for me, baby,” Your legs part instinctually to make more room for him, and Mark took that as his sign to shift gears. “You know… sometimes, every now and then, I’d think about you. If I needed a little extra push towards ecstasy, you’d pop in my head. Think about the way you’d look if I got my hands on you. How you’d feel, how you’d taste,” His fingers prodded at the growing wet patch on your underwear. “Gonna let me see?”
Your back arched off the mattress, hands pulling him impossibly closer to you. “Mark, please stop asking, just do it.”
“Mm, say ‘please’ again.”
“Mark!”
His laugh would be even sexier if it weren’t at your expense. “Alright, fine.” Your panties stayed on as his tongue lapped at your folds through them, the flimsy cotton doing absolutely nothing to stop him from devouring you. You jerked at the feeling as his tongue licked a bold strip through your folds, your hands entangling themselves in his curly locs. “You’re so wet, holy shit.”
One quick motion moved your panties to the side, puffy wet lips on full display for his greedy eyes. His eyes sparkled at the sight, mouth watering at the mere thought of getting to taste you. “Smell so good, pretty girl.” He was so hungry and you were the only one who could satiate him. His tongue had a mind of its own, pressing flat against your folds without a second thought, “Taste even better.”
Mark’s grip on your thighs held you in place as he licked you clean, running his tongue against every nerve-ending he could feel for. He pulled them apart just enough to spread you out for him, just enough to be on full display for him. Your taste occupied every corner of his mind as he blacked out in pleasure, lapping up every drop your gushing pussy offered up.
He circled your clit until you saw stars, your squirming uncontrollable as his tongue darted inside of you. “You’re so good to me.”
Mark groaned between your thighs, in love with the praise you were showering him with. There was something about how natural and seamless it was for you to compliment him that turned him on even more, if that was possible. “I don't think I'll ever get enough of how you taste, Christ.”
His free hand slithered up your torso, sinking his thumb into your eager mouth while his continued working at your core. He wasn’t shy, either, licking boldly from your ass to your clit while shaking his tongue side to side. Slurping up every drop that dribbled out of your entrance, twisting his tongue as far inside of you as he could reach. You were dripping down his chin by the time he introduced his fingers, prodding at your glistening hole with just one to test the waters. He took the way you gripped onto his hair as his sign that you were more than enjoying it. “F-feels good, oh, God.”
“Mm, don’t be shy.”
Laving at your clit, he drank up the praises the way he was drinking you up. He only pulled away to fully discard your panties, diving back into center with renewed vigor. “Need more.” You didn’t want to push him any closer to you, scared you’d smother him, but he didn’t seem afraid to drown. He’d awoken something desperately greedy inside of you, and you were slipping further into a haze of pleasure with every passing moment. Two fingers pressed their way inside of you, pumping slowly to get you adjusted before the jerk of your hips told him to pick up the pace. You couldn’t hold still with the way he was devouring you, mouth and hands prying you open deliciously all for his enjoyment. He would die between your thighs if you let him, you’re sure of it.
You had to physically pull him off of you to get him to stop, orgasming bubbling inside of you in record time. “Want you inside of me already.” The entirety of the lower half of his face was a sticky mess of your arousal, from his nose to his chin completely covered in you. “Bro, you need to wipe… that.” Times like these, you were glad that you kept tissues on your nightstand.
“You cannot and will not call me ‘bro’ now that I know what you taste like. How insulting.”
It hadn’t dawned on you that Mark was still fully dressed, sans his plaid jacket-shirt that was curled in a sad pile on the floor. “Is that an order?”
He bit at his lip, eyes darkening as he drank in your bare figure sprawled beneath him. Your hands ran themselves up and down his arms, finally getting a chance to admire his body after all the focus was turned to you. Maybe it was the lighting, the way his hair fell over his eyes, or just the fact that he was the best kisser you’d had the pleasure of test driving— but he looked divine. Halo of light circling his head as he fumbled with his belt, biceps flexing as he lifted the tank top off of his lean frame. Suddenly, he wasn’t your friend anymore; he was something new entirely.
You were so lost in your own adoration of him that you hadn’t noticed he was undressed, pulling you directly underneath him as he kissed at your collarbones. “Where’d you go off to, huh?”
“It’s nothing,” you shook your head, snapping back to reality (which was so much better than whatever was going on in your will they-won’t they fantasy). “Thank you, for this.”
Mark didn’t respond with words, instead opting to kiss you softly, tenderly. Slowly, deeply, passionately kissing you as he lowered himself atop of you. He wasn’t in a rush anymore, pulling you into him like you were made of glass, grinding against your center like you had all the time in the world. Everything was so delicate, like he was savoring the moment for years to come. It scared you, if you were being honest. “Mark? You know you can still kiss me while you’re inside of me, yeah?”
He hummed in approval, connecting your mouths again in a slow, languid kiss, tongues slithering into each other's mouths and twisting messily. You could feel him lining up with your entrance, his hand wrapped around his girth to guide himself into you steadily. Chancing a look down, you tried to hide the way your eyes bulged out at the sheer size of him— he would never let you hear the end of it if you fawned over how huge he was. It took all of your willpower to remain still, your body welcomed him as though it had hundreds of times, the shape of him slotting inside of you like he was made to. His fingers tangled in your hair, angling your head so he could travel to your neck, groaning out his praise against your sticky skin. The absence of his lips on yours made you whine, hands wandering the expanse of his back just for confirmation that this was real. “Tell me how it feels.”
You couldn’t. Months of the worst dry spell you’d ever experienced coming to a head with Mark milking you for everything you had couldn’t be described. All you could do was moan, coiling around him even tighter as he started to rock his hips forward as though he was testing the waters. He was the only thing you could focus on— his scent, his taste, they way his nose pressed right against yours, the feeling of his fingers intertwining with yours against the mattress, the dionysian desire his hips were fulfilling. It was all just Mark, Mark, Mark. “Mark!” His teeth couldn’t resist nipping at your lip, pulling on it playfully before letting go to let his tongues soothe the area.
“I can’t help it, you’re so fun to play with.” He kissed you to make up for the quick dot of pain, relishing in the way you immediately kissed him back with just as much enthusiasm.
“I’m, I’m close.”
He spread your legs further apart to give himself more room to buck his hips, pressing at your thighs as he fucked into you faster. “Hold it.”
“Whyyyy?”
“You asked for the Mark Lee experience,” His thrusts grew pointed, almost exaggerated as his hips drove forward with precision, “and I’m gonna give it to you.”
You could feel yourself teetering dangerously close to the edge, stomach coiled tight and lungs working overtime. The mere thought of being denied your orgasm was getting you worked up— you hate not getting your way. Your legs wrapped around Mark’s waist, locking your ankles together for good measure. If he wanted to play games, you were down for it. “Harder.”
But instead of faster, Mark slowed to a complete stop, hands drifting down to your hips to pin them to the mattress. “Oh, baby, do you think I’m stupid?” He chuckled in your face, shaking his head as the laughter subsided. “That’s a sure fire way to get nothing.”
“Wait, no, please! I didn’t mean it.”
The damage had already been done. His patience with you was wearing thin, and he didn’t take kindly to disobedience. “Have you learned your lesson?” Each second that passed stole a piece of your orgasm away with it, that delicious ball of tension and heat simmering down to a cool pit of nothing the longer Mark held your hips down. Your heart stopped fluttering with urgency, slowing to its resting rate as you dealt with the consequences of trying to outsmart your best friend. “Speak up, baby.”
“Yes,” You hissed out, annoyed that your declaration of needing to be fucked was currently going unanswered. Who is he to deny you of the very thing he promised you? “I learned my lesson.”
It was exactly what he wanted to hear, “God, you’re so sexy when you behave yourself.” 
You rolled your eyes, slapping his chest as he pulled away from you entirely. “What happened to ‘having me seven ways to Sunday all over this apartment’?” 
It was Mark’s turn to roll his eyes, fingers running through his hair as he sat back on his heels. “Up against the wall.” You did as he said, spreading your hands against the wall as you felt him behind you, lining himself up with your sodden entrance. The inward arch felt unnatural at first, but you settled into it as you got comfortable in it. “Look up at me.” Mark was towering over you, quite literally. From this angle, all you had to do to see his face was look up and there he was with that devilish smile. His cock pressed into you as you watched him, the sheer thickness splitting you clean open for him, sucking him in like your pussy had been waiting for him. “Fuck, you feel so good.”
Maybe it was the taboo of sleeping with a friend, but your body was on fire. You felt your entire body heating up at the sudden change in his demeanor, switching your flirty best friend to a man absolutely starved. With your eyes screwed shut, you reached a hand out to hold onto his arm, fingers giving it a squeeze, head bumping the bare skin of his chest.
“Fuck.”
You were even wetter than you were while he had you pinned to the mattress, the feeling of being filled by him more electrifying after a brief intermission. He was all over you again and that was all that mattered, walls tightening around him with a vice-like grip that had both of you gasping for air.
“Shit,” he hiss, already lost in the sensation, “so good to me, ___, so fucking good.” He emphasized the last syllable with a gentle thrust that had your nails scratching at the wall. Your orgasm was building back up faster than you would’ve liked it to, considering you knew Mark wouldn’t let you cum so soon after denying you.
It hit you deeply, in all the right places at the right angle. Mark was that good from the start, and you couldn’t believe you’d been missing out on it. If you knew he was this goof, you would’ve ruined the friendship ages ago. “So fucking deep, Mark, keep going like that,” you moaned, just as caught up as he was.
He captured your lips in a searing kiss, fucking into you with much more vigor than before, gripping your ass with such force you half expected to see the dents after. You moaned all you had to say, all you had to feel into each other’s mouths. When his velvety tongue enveloped yours you could almost taste the remnants of your arousal and the chocolate muffin he ate right in between sweeping and mopping. The water was still running, hitting part of his back and your leg.
You couldn’t pull away from him even if you tried— he was a part of you now, molded into each other’s bodies until you became one. “Wanna keep fucking you forever,” he groaned, pouring his all into every touch. “Keep you on me forever.”
It threw you for a loop. Keep you forever? Mark was a lot more emotional than he let on, sure, but you couldn’t shake the feeling that he meant it in ways other than platonic. You couldn’t even stop him to ask what he meant by that because he was so deep in your guts that you were starting to feel him in your throat. 
“Don’t stop,” you cried out, biting your lip when he hit a certain spot inside you and kept hitting it over and over again— the taste of blood didn’t stop you. “Don’tstopdon’tsopdon’tstop-”  
“Fuck,” he whisper, voice strained and raspy, smacking at your ass before gripping it and bringing you down to meet his increasingly harsh thrusts, the slap echoing throughout your studio apartment. “Wanna fuck you forever, baby.” One hand kept its vice grip on your hip while the other grasped at your neck, forcing you to maintain eye contact with him. “Gimme a kiss, pretty girl.” Your lips found his despite the blurring of your vision, a supple lock as he steadied rocking into your core. Kissing him upside down felt worlds away from the first kiss you shared with him, and yet you still couldn’t get enough of it. The hand on your hip slithered up to cup your breast, rolling your nipple as he pulled away from the kiss. “So obedient.”
All the shame had disappeared from your body, the satisfaction of finally being fucked numbing you to his quips completely. His name was on the tip of your tongue, begging to be set free, but the way his hips ricocheted off your ass made you short circuit. Your skin was hot to the touch, goosebumps littering the expanse of your body as your toes curled around the fabric of your duvet. 
“Who knew you were such a dirty girl, hm?” Mark tutted. You hold back your moans, reveling in the sensation of his tip sliding up and down you dripping folds. Interrupting his own rhythm just to get a rise out of you, giving you no warning before shoving himself right back in. 
“Bet this was your plan all along,” You ignore the fact that he technically initiated all of this, too blissed out to snap back at him cheekily. “Dripping all over my cock, fuck.” He’s thinking out loud, eyes locked at the way your pussy invites him in, grip unrelenting with each thrust. He drew his hips back again to repeat the same unforgiving tempo, laughing to himself at the way your thighs shake in anticipation.
“Wanted this for so long.” You whine, bashful about the confession rolling off your tongue so easily. Mark had always occupied a special part of your mind, but the barrier of your friendship with him always kept you from thinking of him in that way for too long. He’s hot, sure, and one of the most genuine guys you’d ever met— but risking that by dating him felt too stupid to risk.
Mark didn’t keep you waiting for too long, filling you to the brim with one stroke that had your toes curling. You gasp, a shiver running up your spine as he adopts a frenzied pace that nearly knocks you into the wall in front of you. “You’re so fucking warm.”  He can’t help but moan out at the feeling, clutching onto your hips as he pistons in and out of you. Blunt fingers digging into your skin as you let your body fall forward. You felt so full.
“Mark, fuck.” you whine, probably a tad too loud considering how thin the walls feel at night but you couldn’t help it, with the way he held onto you and fucked you like he had never had good pussy in his life. “Faster.”
“Where’d your manners go? Say ‘please’.” He teased, testing your obedience despite knowing you’d obey him. There was just something about knowing he held your pleasure in the palm of his hands, knowing that you’d do anything he asked of you. 
“Please, please, please Mark, need you so bad.” It sounded  pathetic, and it only makes Markn screw his eyes shut as he fucks you harder. All control lost as he watches the drool drip from your mouth down the wall— he was really fucking your brains out.
Mark's rough groans were slowly morphing  into needy moans, the sound causing even more slick to build up between your legs. “Taking my cock like such a good girl.” And you really were, considering you had nothing but the wall to grip onto, you let your body go wherever Mark led it. Each thrust sending you closer and closer to your climax, his dick hitting every single spot that you’re sure you’d see stars.
“I’m gonna cum, fuck.”
“You’re gonna cum? Mm, you can cum. Cum all over my dick, lemme see that pretty face.” You arched inward one last time for him, looking up at the man sending you to heaven and back on a loop. “There you go. Good fucking girl.” Mark smacked your ass sharply, holding onto your ass as he switched his rhythm to harsh, precise thrusts that were sure to throw you over the edge of pleasure. He kissed your forehead as the growing tension in the pit of your stomach snapped, your walls contracting around him in a tight frenzy that nearly triggered his own. He didn’t slow down, though. The clutching of pussy did absolutely nothing to deter him from fucking you with the same rigor, hips just as quick as they were before he finally let you cum.
“M-Mark, I don’...” The aftershocks of ecstasy silenced you in your tracks, the sparks of pleasure like electricity through your bloodstream. “Don’t stop.”
He laughed at the change of your tune, thumb flitting down to flick at your clit. “Baby needs more? Haven’t had enough yet?”
Even with him poking fun at your desperation, you were too drunk on his cock to care. All you could manage was a chorus of fuck me, fuck me, fuck me as Mark held you flush against him. “God, yes, fill me up like that.” Your arousal was dripping all over the inside of your thighs, the sticky slick glistening under the moonlight that peaked through your curtains. 
“That’s right, I’m not fucking done with you yet, pretty girl.” This side of him was lethal. He was insatiable, obsessed with the way your body responded to him, greedy for the way you bent to his every whim. It was such a change of pace from the way he was kissing you in missionary, the way he treated you like a doll that he was afraid of hurting you. “Feel good?”
He was mocking you— of course, it was good. You didn’t have to tell him that for him to know; but feeding his ego was so addictive. The way he’d reward you for praising him was enough for you to fall for the trap every single time. “So, good, Mark, hngh.”
The smack of his hips against your ass bounced off the walls, echoing the depravity that you and Mark were oh so good at acting on. All of your senses on overdrive, the overstimulation pulling at you from every end, you weren’t sure if you could take it all for much longer. Drool slipped from your mouth onto Mark’s arm, the edges of your vision blurring as you could feel yourself bubbling over. “Gonna cum again?”
“‘m gonna cum again.”
He was drunk with the power of controlling you. “Hold it.”
“Mark, I can’t.” You were surprised you were even able to do it the first two times he commanded it, not used to having gratification delayed against your wishes.
“Gonna fill you up and then you can cum.” It only took a few more targeted thrusts before he was spilling his seed into you, an endless leak of evidence of what took place over the last hour or so. Even as his cock began to soften, he made sure to fuck you through it, massaging tight circles into your clit until your legs spasmed. The air was snatched from your lungs, eyes flittering shut in sweet relief. It was only two orgasms, but the build up had really taken it out of you. Mark flipped you over gently on your back, brushing the hair out of your face as you sleepily opened your eyes.
“Look at that. Take a look at the mess we made, baby.” 
He gestured between your legs, a slippery canvas of cum smeared across your most intimate parts. “So much…” You couldn’t stop yourself from gathering some on your fingers, popping them into your mouth for a taste of the two of you mixed together.
Your brain was on fire, neurons alight with the molten sensation that was Mark Lee. Even though you took him up on the offer, you weren’t expecting him to completely change your world. A solid orgasm and a pat of the back, maybe. But now you were afraid that he was your new addiction that you’d never be able to feed. 
You woke up in a fresh sleep shirt to the smell of toasted bagels and coffee. Mark balanced the plates and mugs the best he could as he tackled the steps leading up to your bedroom area. “Mornin’ sleepyhead.”
“What time is it?”
He shoved a mug of steaming coffee into your hands, kissing you on the forehead. “Don’t worry about that. You were exhausted, wanted to let you sleep.”
“Thank you.” The coffee was exactly to your liking, just what you needed after a night of fucking like rabbits. “So, should we talk about… it?”
Blush rose to his cheeks and there was no hiding it, his hair pulled back into a messy bun so his face was on full display. “I mean, only if you want to? I’m okay with proceeding however you want to.”
“You’d be fine staying friends? Never talking about it? Pretending that nothing’s changed?”
He shrugged, “if that’s what you wanted, then yeah.” His attention shifted to his breakfast, eyes zeroed in on his eggs and toast like it was a gourmet meal. “Just don’t wanna make you feel weird about it, you know?”
“Mark?” You placed your coffee and plate down on your bedside table, turning your full attention to him as he continued to avoid your gaze. “What did you mean by all the ‘keep you forever’ stuff then?”
He rushed to try to explain himself, scrambling his words into a whole lot of nothing. “It’s not, like, a big deal or anything. I just get possessive… in bed, sometimes. I’m not a weirdo or anything, I promise.”
None of that mattered to you anyway, your dreams of Mark that clouded your head all night giving you the push you needed to throw caution to the wind. Would it be the worst thing in the world to risk it all with him? One kiss, chaste and sweet, was enough to shut him up for just a moment. “So if I said we should try exploring further, maybe go on a date or something, you’d say yes?”
His eyebrows shot up to his hairline, mouth falling agape as he searched your face for any signs that you were being facetious. “Y-yeah, yes. If that’s what you want.” He was so bad with his feelings, sometimes— but you were more than willing to be patient.
“Well, good, because that’s what I want.”
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thecherrygod · 2 years
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man i just saw a video that was like. bullet journaling but it was meant to be very basic and simple. and it genuinely made no sense to me
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mooishbeam · 1 year
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『♡』 Servant’s Secret 
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♡ featuring: ayato kamisato x f!reader
♡ summary: the commissioner catches you during some alone time, and decides that punishment is in order. wc: 2.1k+
♡ cw/tw: afab, unprotected sex, breeding, edging, overstimulation, spanking, humiliation, slightly sadist?, cunnilingus, mild degradation, pet names (bunny)
notes: hello! I read a lot of smut but never write it and it's been years since I've written anything so I figured I'd give it a try! sorry if I'm a bit rusty. let me know if u like it <3 comments and reblogs are appreciated!
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The commissioner was a busy man. When he occasionally visited the town, his honeyed words left a lasting pleasant impression on the public. However, Ayato would be gone many nights, returning haggard from cumbersome affairs. He flashes a gentle smile, reluctant to reveal the vitriol he harbored for these repetitive duties. He was a man to be feared, stopping at nothing to achieve his goals. Stern and prideful and clement. Only the most loyal companions could see him in this vulnerable state. Therefore, it came as a surprise to Ayato when he took a liking to you.
Maybe it was the way you accidentally beamed whenever he returned to you, awaiting his arrival like a loyal pet. “Welcome back, my lord.” You’d say in a monotone cadence. Though you were anything but when he wasn’t around. When you and Thoma had your weekly water fights in the kitchen during food prep he pretended not to notice. When your soft giggle echoed against the confines of his heart, he pretended not to notice.  
Simply because the thought of you smiling for everyone but him was frustrating.  
You were a lowly servant. You were careful not to disturb his tedious work. You felt he was much more important than you; a man this compassionate and protective over his people should be considered in the highest regard. Still, you couldn’t help but feel your cheeks glow hot whenever he called your name, saccharine vibrations that sent shivers down your spine. Sometimes his gloved hand would graze against your shoulder or neck, leading you to wonder how it would feel in other places. He never caught you dozing off—or so you thought—but daydreaming about his lips decorating your neck was a daily occurrence.  
Tonight, was a night like any other after finishing your tasks. As you wandered through the garden, the stars casted an orchestra across the welkin. You tell yourself repeatedly to repress the improper thoughts you had of him. But turning to the sky to cleanse your mind doesn’t always help, and so you return to your quarters for a more direct approach.  
Sliding your hands between your legs, the only thing you can think about is Ayato’s delicate fingers working their way inside you, kissing the shell of your ear with light praises. Usually, you were more careful to lock the door and control your voice, but your senses were clouded with the stimulation of chasing your high. “Ayato...” you whimpered into the bed sheets continuously. Just as you were about to cum, a familiar voice approached the door. “(Y/N)? In the morning I need you to- “. Cracking the door open, Ayato caught a glimpse of your flustered, trembling figure.  
It happened so fast you couldn’t register it. He immediately shut the door, followed by a quick “My apologies”. Your orgasm was immediately ruined, and you were mortified. You never prayed to an archon before now, but you called on all of them to save you in this moment.  
Your plan was to avoid him at all costs. The only thing you could hope for was that he didn’t catch the moaning. Your tasks for the next two days were done quickly and quietly, too stricken by horror to bear seeing his face. Ayato immediately caught on, but the thought of chasing you was slightly amusing to him.  
On the third day, your cleaning was just wrapping up.  
“Excellent job today, (Y/N).” His presence this close to your ear was shocking and you almost dropped the duster in your hand. “Thank you, my lord. I’ll be going now.”  
“Mm, no. I would like to speak with you privately.” He said, his lips slightly curling. You wanted anything but that right now.  
“Have I… have I done something wrong my lord?”  
“Have you?” He retorts, his eyes peering into yours. You felt all the air leave your chest. “I don’t think so, no.”  
“Okay, come then.” His tone was almost commanding more than playful, and you knew not to protest.  
In his quarters, you both sat quietly for some time. He leaned forward with his hands under his chin, staring at you from across the desk. You try your best to avert his gaze, but his eyes never leave you. The room feels so much smaller now, like a predator surrounding its prey.
“You’ve been avoiding me. Have I done something to offend you?”  
“No, my lord” you reassure him, “I was just feeling a bit ill.”  
“Ah, I see.” He lazily covered his mouth with one hand, attempting to stifle the sly smirk that creeped onto his face.  
“I can’t allow my subordinate to fall under the weather. May I check?” You allowed him to get closer. He removed one glove and grazed his hand against your face, then the back of your neck, then your ears. You were burning up just from the contact of his bare hand.  
“You feel hot. Looks like a bad fever.” You nod along, fueling the lie.  
“Do liars commonly come down with the flu?” 
“…What?”  
“You were shaking and sweating when I caught you a few days ago, perhaps that’s a symptom.” You immediately knew what he was talking about and went into panic mode looking for a proper explanation. Instead of padding for more lies, you drop to your knees and bow your head.  
“I’m so sorry, my lord. My actions were disrespectful and crude and this will never happen again.”  
A soft ‘tsk’ came from Ayato. “Why are you using ‘my lord’ when my first name was commonplace on your lips not too long ago?” Nothing could make your life worse right now. You couldn’t find any other words and bowed your head again.  
“I’m deeply sorry.”  
“…So, what should I do? I can’t just allow this to go unpunished.”  
“I’ll accept any punishment, my lord.”  
His eyes darkened at this statement.  
“Anything?”  
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“Your lying is more indecent than everything else. What did you say again?”  
You were completely stripped naked and bent over his desk, your hands tied behind your back. It was an hour since you accepted your punishment, and you came three times already. A clit sucker is attached to your pussy, while Ayato sits back and curls his fingers into your dripping heat. Any rational thought you had sunk a while ago. “So- ’m so sorry my lord.” Your words teeter on babbling; mind foggy from his skillful digits. A sharp slap makes contact with your ass a few times, forcing your back to arch and send spikes of pleasure through your legs.  
“I’d appreciate it if my pet was more honest. But it’s okay, I have no problem reteaching obedience.”  
He sped up his fingers, matching the movement of your body writhing in pleasure. Your cum dripping down his gloved fingers made his cock twitch and grow in his tightening slacks. “Poor thing, your pussy is so puffy and sensitive. You’re not going to give up on me, right?” He detached the sucker from your clit and admired how swollen you were. The feeling of being empty made you whine, before he sent a stinging slap to your clit.  
“Ah. No, my l- “Before you could finish, Ayato shoved his fingers covered in your essence in your mouth. You sucked on his fingers, and he tugged your hair roughly, forcing you to look up at him. “You are not to call me ‘my lord’ anymore. Only Ayato. Do you understand?” You nod through half-lidded eyes.  
“Good girl.” He spread your backside to get a perfect view of the sticky mess coating your inner thighs and ass and licked a long stripe into you. The feeling of his wet muscle invaded your senses and turned your brain to mush. He ate you out like a starving man, grunting from the squelching noises that erupted from your core whenever he sucked on your folds. He stopped occasionally to catch his breath and went back in to lap up your juices.  
“Please Ayato, ‘M gonna cum.” He was greedy and unforgiving, feeling his smile soaked in your arousal whenever you pulled away because it was too much. The raw sensation made your knees buckle, but your legs subconsciously opened wider for him. You just wanted to be good for him. Then he suddenly stopped. 
“Are you sure you deserve it?” He cooed. You turn to meet his dark sadistic gaze. 
“Please.” Your words are broken and fall to a whisper, tears spilling from heightened sensitivity. His smile is soft sunlight despite the look in his eyes, and he takes your chin within the caress of his palm. “When you misbehave, these things happen. I don’t think you deserve it just yet.”  
Ayato cut the restraints binding your wrists and carries you bridal style to the plush bedding further in his chambers. He set you down like a delicate flower and began to strip. You try your best to cover yourself, but the numbness in your limbs protested. “Exposing yourself so shamefully in front of the commissioner, how errant.” He teases. Ayato finally springs his cock free, sticky with precum and desire. His veins meet the underside of his shaft and angry red tip, begging to be buried inside you. He steadies over you, placing a breathtaking kiss to trailing soft pecks and bites along your ear. It was stirring you up all over again, and you wrap your arms around his neck to deepen the kisses. “Wan’ you.” You mumble between breaths.  
“Do you? Beg for it.” You suddenly get shy, unable to find the words. “Tell me exactly what you want, my little bunny.” 
“I want... I want you to ruin me. I need it bad Ayato please.” For some reason, verbalizing what you wanted was much more embarrassing, and he felt your reluctance. “This shouldn’t be too hard for you, right? What did you think about when you touched yourself to me?” His directness makes you cower. “Did I face-fuck you to tears or was I more passionate. Tell me everything.” Your breath hitched. “I want your cock deep inside me and I want you to breed me. I don’t want you to hold back, do whatever you want to me please.” This answer seems to satisfy him. 
“Good girl.” 
Ayato positions you into a mating press and in one motion shoves himself balls deep in your sex. His breath is ragged, and the feeling of your walls sucking and clenching around him perfectly drove him over the edge. He begins driving himself in and out of you from base to tip, squelching and slapping from his balls against your ass echoed throughout the room. His veins dragging along your most sensitive spots combined with the tuft of hair that made contact with your clit after each thrust make you dizzy. You're drowning in his scent and your heart is drumming in your chest. “Do you know how long I’ve wanted this?” His words come out shaky. “My little bunny. You’re mine. Say it.” His thrusts get needier and rougher, and his whimpers turn to breathy whining. The coil tightening in your stomach threatened to snap at any minute, but you held on for permission. 
“I'm yours, Ayato. Please-”  
“Go ahead, cum for me bunny. Cum on my cock.” Stern, almost like a command, he speeds up and begins to rub circles on your abused clit. Your legs shake and you throw your head back along with your eyes. You came on him with a scream, violently clenching and pulsing around his girth. He doesn’t stop and fucks you through your high as he is approaching his. “Where do you want my cum?” Everything in you clung to him tightly, and so you begged for him to do it inside. 
“Fuck- you’re such a good slut. All for me.” He finally reaches his climax, stuffing you to the hilt and spurting into you. Thick, hot cum fills you from the inside as he whimpers throughout it, feeling his cock twitch at times. He stays there for a while, making sure you were properly full. Making sure he owned you. You were so exhausted you ended up dozing off with him still inside. 
You wake up to a sleeping Ayato, eyes lingering on the scratches littering his back. You were cleaned up, minus the dark bite marks dotted around your torso. The early morning sun reflected on him like an angel, and you wanted nothing more than to stay with him. Recollecting the hot daze on his face from the previous night, surely there wouldn’t be any harm in continuing this arrangement. 
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bogleech · 6 months
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Also going to finally make a pinned post for all my stuff:
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BOGLEECH - my tumblr blog is named after this website I created around 2002 and still update. Thousands of pages worth of content focusing on creature design as well as real biology. My review of the original Legend of Zelda monsters might be the most straightforward example of my articles. Links to some of the most popular content:
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POKEMON REVIEW ARCHIVE: - I rate and review each and every single Pokemon, in Pokedex order, on its merits as a creature design. I also do so as someone whose favorite animals are all parasites.
DIGIMON REVIEW ARCHIVE - same, but more chaotic.
CREEPYPASTA COOKOFF ARCHIVE - for several years I hosted a yearly writing contest before it grew too big for me to keep up with. There are over a thousand user submitted horror, fantasy, sci fi and surrealist stories here emphasizing unconventional, original ideas you seldom see from the "creepypasta" community!
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The original "MORTASHEEN" Monster Archive - since the early 2000's I've created and illustrated more than 800 creatures and counting for my own monster-catching world, now set for release as a tabletop RPG setting.
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AWFUL HOSPITAL: SERIOUSLY THE WORST EVER (page one): an interactive comedy-horror-sci-fi webcomic I started in 2014 about a medical facility that could maybe be better.
Some of my other internet stuff:
PATREON - constant work makes my patreon updates inconsistent, but the content backlog goes back years with a huge amount of exclusive art and writing. I try to put up new exclusive stuff whenever I can.
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ETSY - I design all sorts of original enamel pins like these, plus I sell zero-maintenance terrarium plants (just leave them in a jar!), original books and other things!
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COLOR THE ABYSS (available on the above etsy!) - a 30 page educational deep sea coloring book! Includes a few famous favorites like giant isopods and hagfish, but mostly focuses on less popular, often much weirder animals.
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UNBELIEVABLE BUGS - also regularly restocked in the etsy store, 30 of the strangest and most surprising arthropods most people have likely never heard of, illustrated by myself and @revretch, written for even the youngest kids to understand (but will likely teach you something new at any age)
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My Itch.io and Ko-fi - both sell digital versions of my books, including some creepypasta collections and my first novel, "Return of the Living," about a world of entirely ghosts suddenly dealing with the appearance of ghost-hunting monsters.
TWITCH CHANNEL - I now try to stream something at least monthly, sometimes weekly when possible, from horror games to books and art.
YOUTUBE CHANNEL - archives my twitch streams and other little things.
INSTAGRAM - look at pictures of my huge weird collection of toys and Halloween collectibles
BLUESKY - I'm going to put mainly just updates to my stuff on here. SEE ALSO:
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HUMANS-B-GONE - a science fiction animated series by my partner @revretch, about a world of kaiju-size, technologically advanced insects and arachnids to whom vertebrates like us are just pesky little "gubs." Also has a tumblr account @humansbgone FINALLY, HERE'S MY GUIDE AND RESOURCE TO MAKING YOUR OWN INTERNET WEBSITE IN A FEW MINUTES WITH NO KNOWLEDGE OF CODING
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twice-inamillion · 9 months
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The Company
Taeyeon and IU’s Plan 
Smut and Story Building (Sex, Deep Penetration, Defloration, Creampie, Fingering, Blowjob) 
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Chapter 3
4,315 Words
(IU finds out that Taeyeon has been looking through her phone that filled with her sexual experiences with her boss. Taeyeon is convinced by IU to get a taste and comes up with a plan. Taeyeon gets more than what she can handle. OC gets a little surprised but is more than happy to accept it.) 
A few weeks pass, and every time Taeyeon stays at IU’s apartment, she notices hints of your sexual relationship with IU. Anything like cum covered panties, cummed covered skirts and marks on IU’s thighs and chest. 
She can’t hold on any longer; she needs to confront her friend about the type of relationship the two of you have. Taeyeon tries to find the looks for the best moment to talk to her about this. 
“I’m going to ask her today; I can’t wait anymore. It’s awkward every time I see the two of them together.” 
Taeyeon arrives earlier than usual and prepares dinner for the both of them, “Some pasta would be nice and easy to do. She changes into some comfortable clothes and gathers all the necessary items to make the meal. 
“Taeyeon, I’m home.”
“Welcome back. I made dinner for us.”
“Aww, that’s nice of you. Let me change.”
“Okay, I’ll set the dinner table.”
Taeyeon sets the dinner table and waits for IU to take a seat before serving her. “What’s the special occasion?”
“Nothing much. I just got tired of ordering takeout and wanted to make something homemade.”
“Haha, you should do this more often.”
“I’ll try, only when I’m done early. Anyways, how was your day? Don’t think we have talked comfortably in the past few days.”
“Hmm… nothing much. Just the same old thing. You know, helping with ranking the trainees, setting up meetings, and doing my duties as the CEO’s assistant.”
“What kind of duties do you have?”
“Just busy stuff like going over his daily and weekly schedule, setting up his meetings, sometimes bringing him his meals or some do simple tasks.”
“Seems like he has you overworking yourself.”
“Ah, no, that’s not true. He also has Irene as the secondary assistant. We share the tasks here and there. It's not that bad, actually, once you get used to it. But there are times when it does get busy, and I come home tired.”
“Is he nice to you?”
“He can be a bit tough, but he treats me nice. He asks how I’m doing, buys me nice things like jewelry, and gives me spending money.”
“Seems like the two of you have more than a boss-and-employee relationship.”
IU smiles and tries to play it off, but Taeyeon teases her, “Omg, are you and your boss something?” IU can’t help but grin, causing Taeyeon to push deeper, “I kind of figured the two of you were a thing. Is it actually a thing or work sex?”
“Haha, why do you want to know? Are you perhaps interested?”
“No! I just wanted to ask since you have been acting a bit differently.” 
“Hmm.. okay. I’ll tell you, but don’t tell anyone else, okay?”
Taeyon is now completely invested in finding out their relationship and eagerly nods, “Yeah, I won’t tell anyone.”
“Okay, remember how I told you that my family has financial issues?”
“Yeah, of course. You said that your family was struggling really back, especially your mom.”
“I wanted to help her somehow, so I contacted some people and became his personal assistant. This meant I had to service him at the workplace and him “personally.” I knew it was bound to happen and did it for my mother’s sake. So I had my first time with him. I thought I would hate him, but he’s really caring. He and I aren’t dating; it’s just a work relationship. I’ve been with him for a bit over a year and learned that it’s better to take the initiative and serve him than for him to act on it. If he has to ask for it when he might fuck you based on his mood, and trust me, that might be a bit dangerous. So I learned to read his mood and service him.”
“Oh wow. I didn’t know it was that serious.”
“The pay is really good, and the benefits are much better. This is one of the reasons why I have this apartment, and my mom is living in a nice house.”
Taeyeon hesitants but asks, “By the way, how far have you gone? Like, what do you do?”
“Well… the first few times, it was just regular sex, then it was a handjob and blow job. As time kept going, we would do more stuff, like me giving him head in his office or having sex in there too.”
“Have you two done anal?”
“Ahh, I haven’t, but he’s done it with someone else.” 
“Who?”
“Irene, his other assistant.”
“He fucks her too?”
“Yeah, and let me tell you this. Their relationship is much different than mine. She didn’t want to service him and learned the hard way. Anyways, are you interested?”
“What do you mean?”
“Don’t try to hide it, Taeyeon. I know you looked through my panties in my hamper and went through my phone.” 
Taeyeon panics and lies, “No, I didn’t do that.” 
“Don’t lie, that phone is something that he gave me. It screen records every time someone tries to log in. So I know that you’ve been looking at my videos of him fucking me.”
Taeyeon panics, and it shows. IU reads Taeyeon like a book and teases her by asking, “Are you interested in him?”
“Ahh, no! I’m just interested.”
“Lies, I’ve heard your moaning during the night. I know that you’re sexually interested and frustrated.”
“No, you’re wrong.” 
“I mean, if you are, and I know you are. It will make my job easier. There are so many things I have to do, and if he’s busy with you, then that means I have to spend less time servicing him. What do you think?”
“Umm… I don’t know.”
“I’ll even help you. I’ll tell you the best time and even get him a bit tipsy for you, haha.”
“You’ll help me?”
“Yeah, you’re my friend. It’s not like I have anything to lose. Look, I’ll even show you some pictures from today,” as IU pulls out her phone and shows Taeyeon a video of you getting your cock sucked and you cumming in her mouth and face. IU notices Taeyeon slide her hand between her legs and rubs herself under the table, “Don’t tell me you don’t see yourself being in my place. Just imagine his hot cum on your face and going down your throat.”
“Hmm… you said you’ll help me, right?”
“Yeah, I’ll take care of everything. You just got to follow my advice, and you’ll be good.”
“Okay, I’ll do it,” causing IU to smile.
————
“Is that the last schedule for the day?”
“Yes, sir. You’re done for the day. Are you planning on dining out?”
“No, I just want to go home and rest. This was a busy and long weekend; I wanted to have a drink and relax. I’ll probably go out tomorrow.”
“Would you still like me to service you later tonight?”
“Hmm… actually, how about we share a drink?”
“It would be my pleasure, sir.”
You gather all your belongings and head to your apartment with IU. The two of you wait for the elevator and can’t help but notice the large height difference between the both of you, almost a foot apart. The elevator door slides open, and the two of you enter and scan your keycard to the top floor. 
Arriving at the top floor, you walk down a long hallway towards the single, large door on the floor and insert your code to enter, “Finally, back home.” The two of you take your shoes off, leave your items on the table by the hallway, and sit on the large couch. 
“Would you like me to serve you the usual?”
“Yes, please.”
IU heads towards the kitchen and to the alcohol cabinet and grabs a bottle and two glass cups. She pours the both of you a drink and walks back. “Here you, sir.”
“Thank you.”
“You’re welcome.”
“I like your initiative, Ji-eun. You’ve become a reliable assistant.”
“No, thank you, sir. For the opportunity to serve you and the help to my family.”
“Ahh, yes. How’s your mother doing?”
“She’s doing well, thanks to your generosity.”
“No need to thank me; it’s all due to your hard work.”
IU grabs the bottle once more and pours another drink as you enjoy the view from the top floor of the building. Watching the sunset is one of your favorite things after coming home from a long day. 
“Would you like me to order you takeout, sir?”
“Sure, that’d be great.”
“What would you like?”
“You can choose.”
“Okay, I’ll place an order.”
You place your drink down and change into something more comfortable while waiting for the food to arrive. IU sets the table, cleans a bit of the living room, and places your items where they belong. “Would you like another drink?”
“Yeah, I could go for another one.”
She serves you another drink, and you take small sips as you continue to enjoy the view from your living room couch. You and IU have a small conversation about some of the schedule for next week and about the process of the trainees when IU’s phone pings. “Sorry, sir. It’s the delivery person; I’m going to go down to the lobby and meet them. I’ll be right back.”
“Okay, sounds good.”
You walk to the kitchen, open the fridge door, and grab a couple of beers for the meal. You wait for IU to arrive and check your messages. When you hear the door ring go off, signaling that IU was coming inside. 
“Sir, I’m back.”
“Nice, I grabbed a couple of beers for the two of us.”
“Sir, I met Taeyeon in the lobby and asked her to join us. Would that be okay with you, sir?”
“Yeah, that’s fine.”
“She’ll be coming up in a few. She just went to get changed.”
“Okay, let's get the table ready for three.”
After a few minutes, the doorbell rings, and IU opens the door for Taeyeon. “Hello, sir. Thank you for allowing me into your house.”
“It’s no problem; you’re welcome anytime; come take a seat.” 
Taeyeon sits on the couch across from you," Would you like a beer?”
“Yes, I’ll take one.” he grabs a beer and opens it. She crosses her legs, and you catch a glimpse of her not wearing any panties. You try not to look at it, but you can’t help but admire her thighs. 
“The pizza is ready.”
“Thanks; actually, do you think it would be better to eat here in the living room since it’s pizza?”
“We could do that,” says IU.
“I’ll help you, Ji-eun,” standing up and helping bring the plates to the living room table. 
With everyone sitting down, you all grab a slice of pizza and a beer and start to eat. You ask Taeyeon about her week and if she’s comfortable as the vocal coach. 
“I like it here; the place is beautiful, the staff is nice, and the trainees are very hardworking.” 
“That’s good to hear. Better than SM, huh.”
“Haha, yeah, it is,” she laughs.
IU mentions that she’s been hearing positive feedback from the trainees ever since she started and congratulated her on a good job. Taeyeon smiles and puts her feet on the couch, giving you a better view of her private area. 
You try not to look, but you can’t help your curiosity and eye her every time she moves her legs. IU notices this and asks, " Taeyeon, would you mind passing me a napkin?”
“Sure,” and she reaches for the napkin, allowing you to get a glimpse of her cleavage under the oversized shirt. IU looks at you and smiles, knowing that the plan is working.
“Like what you, sir?”
You turn around to IU, “What do you mean?”
“I asked if you liked what you saw.”
You see IU’s smile and turn to Taeyeon and see her smile. “What’s going on?”
IU says, “What do you think, sir? She wants you.”
“Is that true?”
“What do you think? I wouldn’t give a show to just anyone,” says Taeyeon.
“Hmm… So the both of you planned this.”
“You catch on quick, sir.”
“Okay, I’ll play your game. Taeyeon, you must be aware of the type of relationship I have with Ji-eun, right?”
“Yes, I’m aware.”
“And you’re fine with that?”
“Yeah, I am.”
Calling her bluff, you stand up, walk towards her, and extend your hand. “Alight, since you want to play, we can go right now.”
“R…right now?” looking at IU, who only smiles.
Knowing what will happen, she takes your hand and follows your lead to one of the bedrooms. The both of you hear a small chuckle from IU, and her saying, “Have fun,” before you close the door.
“You want to play? Let's see if you’re game,” and sit on the one-seater coach in the room. 
Taeyeon stands there, confused about what you mean. “Strip.”
Taeyeon is caught off guard by your command and hesitates. You repeat it once more, “Strip.” Understanding you’re serious; she stands before you crosses her arms, and removes her oversized shirt and then her loose, small shorts. 
In front of you is a completely nude Taeyeon. She has small breasts and a clean, shaven cunt. Without saying a word, you scan her body, from her feet to her head. She turns around and gives you a view of her behind, “Amazing. I can’t believe a member from Girls Generation is standing in front of me, nude.”
You signal her to approach you and say, “Come over here.” You grab both her hands and her right in front of you. You lick your index and middle finger and rub her lower lips. She moans at the sudden touch of your warm fingers against her cold skin. Using your two fingers, you trace and swirl the outside of her lips until you feel her moist. 
You remove your fingers, pull her towards you, and pick her up. She suddenly yelps from being picked up and notices you walking towards the bed. You toss her onto the bed and watch her reaction as you spread her legs wide open, giving you an embarrassed look. She tries to cover her pussy, to which you tease her and say, “I guess you’re all talk and no game,” giving her a smirk. She gets offended and removes her hands out of pride, responding, “I’m not all talk; I can back it up, too.”
“You’re sure about that?”
“Yeah, I am.”
“I’ll give you one last chance to back out.”
“Don’t need it, I can play along.”
“Alright. Let’s play.” 
You remove your shirt and shorts and toss it to the couch. Taeyeon’s heart begins to race as she’s focused on your boxers and sees you pull them down, revealing your semi-hard cock. You pull her towards you and her folds once you say, “You have a really nice pussy right here.”
“You think so?”
“Yeah. I can’t wait to fuck you,” grabbing your cock and pressing it against her lower lips. She pushes your cock away and says, “Wait, you’re not going to wear a condom?”
You stop and are surprised by the most ridiculous question and reply, “What do you mean a condom? I only fuck, raw. Why? You don’t want to?”
No, I was just wondering. I heard that it’s important to wear a condom.”
“I check myself regularly, so I’m good. Are you?”
“No, I’m good.”
“Okay, then we’re all good to continue, right?”
“Yeah,” turning her head around and thinking of all the possibilities of fucking without a condom. 
You grab your cock with your right hand and give it a few pumps and press it against her lower lips. You look at Taeyeon and see her face of anticipation, waiting for your next move. With your hardened cock against her entrance, you smack it against her folds right before inserting yourself inside of her. 
Taeyeon groans from the pain of your cock making its way through her tight walls. “Fuck… you’re so tight!” as you shove more of your cock inside her. Due to the pain, Taeyeon grabs onto the bedsheets with all her might. 
Suddenly, Taeyeon screams when you shove your whole length inside of her in one go. “Wait…Wait… pull out, pull out, you’re breaking me!”
Seeing her in pain, you pull out your cock, and caress her cheek, “Are you okay?” Taeyeon replies, “You’re too big; I thought it was going to die. Give me some time to get myself together.”
‘Wait… don’t tell me” as you look down and look at the tip of your cock covered in a thin layer of red. 
She nods her head in tears and says, “Yeah, it’s my first time.” You’re surprised by her comment and would have never known that this would be her first time, but the idea of being her first man makes you hard again. 
You grab a tissue, get yourself cleaned, and reassure Taeyeon that you’ll make it pleasurable. She nods and wipes the tears off her face before you move on to insert yourself once more. 
With your cock at the entrance of her, slowly insert your length; Taeyeon groans from the slight pain in her walls and begins to stretch to their limits, “Ow… you’re still too big.” You get on the bed, get on top of her, and begin to kiss her neck and play with her breast as you move inside of her. 
Taeyeon slowly forgets about the pain and focuses on the pleasure of your kissing and her tits, “Hmm, yeah… that feels good, don’t stop.” You move towards her breast and take her nipple into your mouth as you play with the other. She continues to moan and let free of her nipple and continue to thrust your cock.
Taeyeon wraps her arms around your neck now that she’s comfortable with your length. You increase the pace of your thrusting, causing her to moan and even laugh, “I can’t describe the feeling, but it feels so good!” 
“Just wait, it's going to feel better,” as you place her into a mating press. With her legs pushed back, you do a strong thrust, each other’s pelvis smacking against each other. “How do you like that? Can you feel it deep inside you?”
“Ahh.. yeah, I can feel the difference. My womb is taking the shape of your cock!” Her hands move towards her breast, pinching and twisting her nipples as she feels her orgasm coming. 
Seeing her pleasuring herself, you can’t help but tease her as you focus your focus on her clit. Taeyeon yelps, asking you to stop because she can feel an overwhelming feeling approaching.
Instead, you place it between your thumb and your index finger and give it a nice pinch. This causes Taeyeon to instantly cum, as you feel a rush of fluid covering your cock. You pull out and enjoy the scene of her orgasm as her body violently shakes. You watch as she rides her orgasm and decide to tease her, so you insert your middle finger and begin to thrust inside her cunt. “Don’t… don’t do that, you’re going to make me come! Stop!” It didn’t take her long for her to reach her second orgasm. “Ahh, fuck! I’m cumming!” as a gush of fluid sprays and her body spasms. 
“Wow, I didn’t have to do much. Seems like you don’t relieve yourself often, but that won’t be a problem now that I’m here. You’re going to be a good fucking with me, but now that you had your fun, it’s my turn.”
“Wait, what are you doing?”
“I need to get my fill too, you know.” 
“Please… wait,” not letting her finish her sentence as you insert your cock inside. She throws her head back and screams, “Oh fuck! You’re going to mess me up inside!” Her walls tighten around your cock, not used to having your massive length inside of it. 
“Your walls want to squeeze my cock, fuck you feel so tight.” You start to pump your cock inside her slippery walls, feeling all the grooves and crevices of her meaty flesh. 
You listen to the beautiful sound of Taeyeon’s moaning as you thrust inside of her for what feels like ten minutes. Taeyeon is a complete mess; her hair is ruined, and her body is all sweaty. The tipsy sensation has disappeared, and let her know that you’re about to reach your peak, “Fuck, I’m about to cum.”
“Wait… what did you say?”
“I said I’m about to cum. Where do you want it?”
Puzzled, she tries to come up with an answer, and it is taking longer than what you’re used to. Not wanting to hold it in any longer, you decide where you want to bust your load. Feeling the weird feeling of your cock throbbing your cock she says, “Outside, do it outside,” but it's too late.
The amount of time she wastes on deciding, you end up making the choice for her. You pull your cock out and do one last thrust when you hear her say she wants you to cum outside. Instead, all she hears is, “Fuck! I’m cumming!” Her eyes widen when she hears your comment, and she is bombarded with a large wave of cum flooding her womb. 
She cries, “So hot! Pull out!” That only makes you want to shove your cock in deep and paint her womb white. 
After finishing your orgasm, you notice Taeyeon looking at her bulging belly, filled with your load. You pull out and watch as she presses her fingers on her stomach, causing a large amount of cum to ooze out. “I told you to do it outside.”
“You took too long, so I made a choice. Plus, I normally cum inside of my girls, so there shouldn’t be an issue, right?”
“But I’m not one of your girls. I’m not IU or Irene.”
“Yeah, you’re right. You are not them, but since you took my hand, you’re mine now.” 
“You don’t own me.”
“Haha, says the person with the cum of their boss inside of her.”
She sees your smirk and realizes that you’re right; she does have her belly full of your cum right now. “Don’t smirk.”
“You know, I’m right. How about another round?”
“Another round?”
“Yeah, I mean, if you’re up for it.”
Taeyeon’s pride doesn’t let her back down; she wants to wipe that grin off your face, even if it means going another round. She looks down at you and notices your hardened cock. “Alright, I can do another round.”
“Haha, alright. Let's change the scenery,” as you extend your hand. She takes your hand, and you walk her to the balcony. She looked down and saw the campus and trainees walking in groups back to their dorms after a long Friday night. 
You kiss her nape, which causes her to shiver, and her nipples harden. “Put your hands against the railing.” 
“Why?”
“Don’t worry. Just let me lead, and enjoy.”
“Okay.”
You raise her right leg up in the air, and with your left hand, you position your cock to her entrance. “What are you do… ahhh” as she feels your cock penetrating her cunt once more. The both of you spend the whole night fucking throughout the penthouse, the balcony, living room, kitchen, and shower. Every time you move locations, you make sure to make the two of you get to orgasm. 
————-
Taeyeon wakes up on the bed, looks around, and notices you are gone. She gets up and looks at the many stains throughout the bed, which makes her remember the night she had. She takes a cold shower to wash the stains of fluid on her body, “Ugh… I feel so full.” She presses her stomach and notices a white cream liquid oozing out of her. Pressing her belly harder, a gush of cum squirts out, covering the shower floor cum, “Fuck…that’s too much.” 
After her shower, she changed into her clothes and walked out to see you in the living room, reading a newspaper. She walks towards you, “Good morning,” to which you reply, Good Morning, Taeyeon.”
As she walks towards the kitchen, she turns around to ask if she could grab something to eat when she sees IU on her knees. “Ji-eun! What are you doing?” 
IU turns around with a smile on her face and replies, “Good Morning, Unnie. I made breakfast, by the way.” 
“Why are you going down on him?”
“Oh, I’m having breakfast too. Want some?” as she holds your cock in her hand. 
“No!”
“Come on, it's good.”
“No.”
“Are you sure?”
She looks at her friend’s satisfied face and remembers the videos she has masturbated to before. She looks at you and back at her, giving her a reply.
You woke up this Saturday morning full of energy. After going on a run early in the morning, you return and enjoy the breakfast your assistant, IU, made for you. You give her a treat as a reward for a job well done. 
You turn, you’re done reading your newspaper, set it on the table, and enjoy the sight in front of you. “It’s nice to see two friends sharing a meal together,” you say with a slight grin.
774 notes · View notes
seospicybin · 3 months
Text
ON THE ROAD.
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PART I
Bangchan, Han & Jeongin x reader. (s,f,a)
Chapters: Part II
Synopsis: A group of friends going on a road trip that, little did they know, will change their lives forever. (19,1k words)
ON THE ROAD PLAYLIST.
Author's note: My inbox is always open for feedback and your wild theories hehehe enjoy this one too! x
A famous author once said that friendship is born at that moment when one person says to another: "What! You too?"
For years, Chan believes that in order to make friends, he has to have common things with them, for example, having the same favorite books having the same hobbies, etcetera.
That's what he thought until he found out that in real life, that's not always the case.
Chan learns all about friendship when he meets his friends. He first met them at the art school 8 years ago and they remain good friends to this very second.
Because they're now living in different places and working in various professions, they have this weekly group video call every Friday at 8 pm.
Chan is so busy editing videos that he almost forgets that it's Friday and it's ten minutes to 8, he hurriedly opens his laptop to start a video call with his friends. He knows it'll take them some time to come online so he notifies his friends through the group chat too, not forgetting to add that he'll not make them watch a foreign movie tonight in the hope that they'll hurry.
That's one thing about Chan, he's passionate about movies and dreams of becoming a great movie director someday. Other than that, Chan has many great qualities about him. He's smart, he's good looking, he lives a healthy lifestyle, and a true social butterfly, something about him that makes people comfortable being around him. Those qualities combined with his dimpled smile create this magnet that attracts a lot of girls.
However, Chan only has eyes on one girl and one girl only.
"Oh, hi, Chris!" A voice that's way too familiar says through the laptop, a voice that evokes something deep within him and sends a tingle down his spine.
"Hi, Jinnie!" Chan says back with a smile.
-
Jinnie's Friday night is like any other night, she's drawing in her studio with the scented candle filling the room with the soft and sweet smell of vanilla. At times, she'll take a break to sip her tea and check her phone for the time.
It's almost 8 and she wonders why the group chat isn't blaring with notifications, she pouts thinking that everyone is too busy to have a video call tonight.
Just like the universe heard her wistful thinking, her phone chimes with a notification and her face lights up as she opens it.
It's Chan sending a link to the video call. Jinnie wastes no time to get on her laptop and clicks on the link that takes her to where everyone is going to virtually meet. A few seconds later, her face appears on the box on the screen next to Chan and that means she's the first to come online after him which is not a surprise.
"Oh!" She delightfully gasps, feeling happy to see a friendly face even though they had one of the video calls a week ago.
"Hi, Chris!" She greets him while smiling and enthusiastically waving her hand through the screen.
"Hi, Jinnie!" Chan replies with his sweet, dimpled smile.
It's kind of adorable to find him waving with his muscular arms and Jinnie can't help but smile. She adjusts her desk lamp to give her proper lighting then stacks her hands together.
"It's always us, huh?"
"What?" Chan asks as he leans closer to the screen.
"It's always you and me," Jinnie says, pointing at him and then at herself while half laughing.
Chan cracks a laugh at that, "And that means Jeongin will come next."
"Cause we all know who will come last."
"You mean who will come late?" Chan corrects him with a smirk.
Jinnie lowly chuckles and grabs her cup of tea from the other desk, "How are you, Chris?"
"I'm doing great, I guess," he answers.
"I guess?" Jinnie squinted her eyes at him as she repeated his words, "You've been staying up all night again, did you?"
"Well, uh..." Chan tries to make up an excuse but fails, he covers his eyes in embarrassment and laughs it off, "I tried not to."
"Are you working on something?"
"Yeah, I'm editing these videos for a short film I did with a friend," he answers.
"Oh? Is it the same one as the one you told me?"
"No. It's a different one."
"I know you're working, I hope you keep taking care of yourself well, Chris," Jinnie warmly tells him, genuinely concerned as a friend.
Jinnie has always been like that, kind, attentive, and a great illustrator, she's as gentle as the colors she uses in her art. She's beautiful but not solely because she's the only girl in this group of friends.
Jinnie's outer appearance matches her inside and you rarely find that kind of person.
The other often think of Jinnie as an angel that unluckily fell on this part of the earth, right in the middle of this friendship, and has become a blessing to everyone ever since.
"Oh, there's Jeongin!" She gasps, showing the same enthusiastic and bright smile whenever she sees her friends.
In other words, there's lucky to have Jinnie as their friend.
-
The letter feels heavy on his hand even though it's only a piece of paper, a piece of paper that holds his future and will forever change his life.
Jeongin should be happy, this is what he wants but something is tugging at his chest. He slips the paper back into its envelope and hides it in between pages of the book he's reading.
He reclines on his chair and runs his hands through his hair, feeling torn but he doesn't know what makes him feel that way. He closes his eyes as if it would help him shutting his mind off and ignoring the chimes that come from his phone until he remembers to check it.
Using his hand, he gropes around the table to find his phone without looking and unlocks it to find some notifications, the first three are coming from Chan.
Jeongin rushes on his chair realizing that it's Friday and he forgot about the video call. He immediately gets on his computer and logs into the link Chan sent him through the group chat.
Despite knowing that he's late, he remains calm because he knows he'll not be the last to join, there's someone else who will come later than him.
The screen takes a moment to load the video call and he appears on the lower box between his two friends, Jinnie and Chan.
"Oh, there's Jeongin!" Jinnie exclaims in joy, as beautiful and bright as usual like she's bringing her own sun wherever she goes.
"Well, Chan said we're not going to watch a weird foreign movie so here I am," Jeongin jokingly says.
"Thank you, Jeongin," Chan says, poking his cheek with his tongue, easily offended as expected which truly shows he's the oldest one in this group of friends.
"But the last one we watched was really good," Jinnie says, defending Chan with his exquisite taste in movies.
So here's the thing, everyone knows that Jinnie and Chan would make a perfect couple but it's a mystery why they're not dating yet.
Jeongin knows for sure that Chan has a feeling for Jinnie and it's so obvious, but he can't say the same about Jinnie even though it's impossible that she missed all of those signs.
Or maybe love is a simple thing because Jeongin is someone who watches from the outside and it's different for those two individuals involved. But still, Chan has been there all along and Jinnie doesn't see it, which infuriates Jeongin at times.
Whenever he sees them together, he gets the urge to point out everything but instead of that, he lets out a sigh and then puts on a smile.
"So, how are you guys?" He asks.
Jeongin has always been the quiet one, but don't take his silence as ignorance, he's very observant. He watches everything and remembers everything to the tiniest details, that's also why the others become extremely careful with what they say or do around Jeongin because they know he has their cards under his sleeves.
But being observant also means he has sound judgments about things, he's fair and sensible and that makes Jeongin the most reasonable one.
"I'm great. I'm having a cup of tea with me," Jinnie says, showing the cup of tea she's holding with both hands with her eyes forming two crescents as she smiles.
"And I'm good, thank you for asking," Chan says with his dimpled smile.
"I'm not asking you, Chris," Jeongin jokes.
Chan presses his lips together until they form a thin line and lets out air through his nostrils with his eyes closed while Jinnie is giggling.
"How was the recital going?" Jinnie asks.
"It went well," Jeongin answers.
Honestly, everything went so well, he's still playing piano as always and has shows to do but something about it makes him feel a little distressed that he feels the need to shift the talk.
"Well, we're not watching Chris' weird movie tonight—"
"It's not weird," Chan groans in disagreement and a glare aimed at him.
Jeongin refuses to correct his earlier remark and continues, "So what we're going to do tonight?"
Truthfully, Jeongin really needs the distraction tonight and he doesn't mind at all even if it means he has to endure three hours of watching a movie he can't understand, plot or language-wise.
"I have an announcement," Chan says.
"What kind of announcement?" Jinnie curiously asks with her eyes comically widening.
Chan swivels his chair to the side and plays with a stress ball in his hand, "I can't say anything yet until everyone gets here," he says.
Jeongin groans as he reclines on his chair and covers his face, knowing that it'll take only God knows how long until the last person finally comes online.
"In that case, I'll get myself a can of soda first," he says to everyone, then gets up from the chair.
When he returns to his room, Jeongin notices that the fourth person has joined the video call. Actually, he can hear it even before he enters the room from his babble.
"I know you guys have been waiting for me. No need to get that excited!" Han says, acting like he didn't just make everyone wait for him as usual.
-
Han is trapped in his own head like usual, arranging words in his head to make good lyrics for the track he made last night. He pictures those words in his head as he hums the melody to himself and then jots them down in his notebook.
He puts the headphones on again to hear the track once more, singing the lyrics to fit the melodies and only realizing that his mom is calling for him once she appears in front of him.
Disoriented, Han sits up on the bed and puts his headphones down, "What's wrong?"
"I've been calling you for dinner!" His mother scolds him.
He lets out a chuckle and takes his headphones off altogether, "But it's only five," he says.
His mother must have been so used to seeing him in his room and unaware of the time.
"I put the dinner in the oven," she informs with a dramatic head shake before exiting his room.
Is it dinner time already? He looks around for his phone on the bed, he's sure it's somewhere in there. He's flinging the duvet and then there's the sound of his phone falling onto the floor.
"Owh?!" He gasps, covering his small mouth with his hand.
Han rushes to the other side of the bedroom and picks it up, fortunately, his phone doesn't crack or break, but the time...
"Oh??!" He gasps again in a rather panicky tone.
It's almost 9, he's late for the video call again. He rushes to his laptop and it won't turn on because it runs out of battery.
"Ugh!" He groans as he struggles to plug it in the first time and groans again as he plops onto his chair.
It's always like this, losing track of time when he starts working on something. He remembers it was only four when he started writing his lyrics and now it's almost 9 pm.
It's like the laptop knows he's in a hurry it decides to take more time to boot and Han nervously taps his fingers against the desk, knowing that he makes his friends wait for him for the umpteenth time.
His fingers are typing as fast as they can to log in to his account but it takes him another moment to load the video call.
"Work faster you piece of a—"
"Welp. There he is!" Chan exclaims, looking annoyed but relieved at the same time.
"Thank you for finally gracing us with your presence," Jeongin says with the right amount of sarcasm in his tone.
"Oh, hi, Han!" Jinnie says, being the most welcoming out of the three.
"I know you guys have been waiting for me. No need to be that excited!" Han playfully says. He knows they're upset and tries to lighten the mood.
In his defense, he didn't do it on purpose. It becomes a habit at this point and he knows everyone will eventually let it slide.
"I guess you've been busy working on your lyrics again, huh?" Jinnie asks, propping her hand under her chin.
"No, I was helping my mom fold the laundry," Han makes a joke out of his own life.
Unlike everyone else, Han is the only one who hasn't figured out yet what to do with his talent for producing music. He's been working on some tracks but that's about it.
"Anyway, what kind of weird movie are we going to watch tonight?" He asks, shifting the talk to something else.
Chan clicks his tongue and says, "Thank you for making it obvious that you didn't read the group chat."
"Well, I opened them but didn't read them like all cool people do," Han confidently says with a sly grin plastered on his face.
Despite the uncertainty of his career, Han thinks he's the coolest of them all and doesn't care if anyone thinks otherwise. He's funny, and he's the mood-maker of the group but in all honesty, he's just being his authentic self 24/7.
"Okay, now since we're all here..." Chan says, sitting upright in his seat.
"Oh, so we're not watching a movie tonight," Han says in utter confusion, this is why he shouldn't be late so he won't miss out on a lot of things.
"Just shh..." Jeongin hushes him with a finger in front of his jutted lips.
"You're not like... dying, right?" Han hesitantly asks because Chan puts on a serious face, "It's cause you look so pale..."
"I've always been pale. What are you talking about?" Chan grumbles in disbelief, not accepting the fact that his pale skin makes him look like he's dying to him.
"Hannie!" Jinnie sharply calls his name, that is her way of sparing herself from using profanities
"I told you to just shh..." Jeongin scolds him more.
"Okay, okay, I'll shut up," Han says with both hands raised in defeat.
"Anyway," Chan reels the conversation back to the main thing and claps his hands together to get everyone's attention, "I need you guys to get days off for a week at the beginning of next month."
"But why?" Jeongin asks.
"Jinnie, Jeongin, I give you guys a month of forewarning so there's no reason you can't do it," Chan explains, not taking any excuses.
"And you're not concerned about me?" Han asks, feeling left out.
"That's because I know you're always available," Chan shortly answers.
"I need to ask permission from my mom!"
"To do what?" Chan squints his eyes at him.
"Permission to go on a road trip with you guys," he innocently answers.
"You're not some 12-year-old going on a school field trip," Jeongin reminds him that he won't be needing that.
"Oh, yeah, okay," Han meekly says with a nonchalant shrug.
"Well, that means I only need to finish some of my drawings early," Jinnie calmly says.
Chan smiles at her through the camera, "I know you can do it," he sweetly says.
"Thank you, Chris," Jinnie says with a smile.
"Wait, wait, you haven't answered my question," Jeongin interrupts the tender moment between the two, "Why?"
Chan sucks air through his teeth and stretches his arms out, not sure if he's trying to show off his muscular arms or just wanted to stretch them out.
"Because we're going on a road trip!" He announces in a cheery tone.
Jinnie grins in reaction and then claps her hands in excitement, "That sounds fun!"
"Where are we going?" Jeongin further asks.
"I don't want to spoil it yet. It's a surprise," Chan replies.
"I doubt that it'll be a good surprise," Han says just to annoy Chan.
"Just trust me on this!" Chan remarks with a confident smile.
"I just can't wait to spend time with you guys," Jinnie warmly says, being not shy to show her excitement which makes Chan get a little flustered.
"For the rest of this month we'll stop the weekly video meeting," Chan comes with a shocking announcement.
It's the only way they can hang out with each other and knowing that they won't meet until further notice kind of bummed him out.
"Why? Why? Why?" Han repeatedly asks like a parrot.
"So you guys can sort things out," Chan explains, "and Jinnie needs time to finish the drawings, right?"
"Yeah, but..." Jinnie looks a little taken aback too, "I'm sad that we'll not be hanging out for weeks."
"But we'll meet again," Chan assures her.
He clasps his hands in front of him and goes into serious mode once more, "I need you guys to gather at Jinnie's on the first day of July and I'll pick you up there," he informs.
Jinnie nods
"What should we pack?" Jinnie asks, even getting her notes ready to write them down.
"Pack clothes for a week, swimsuits, sunblock, hiking shoes..." Chan lists various things.
"Hiking shoes?" Han gasps, "I'm not going then."
"Even better," Jeongin lightly comments.
"Any more questions?" Chan asks everyone.
Han raises his hand even though he's not in a class, "How's your little sister doing?"
This is where Chan gets a little more serious, he hisses and then says, "I'm not taking any more questions then."
"Why are you so against us dating?" Han pokes fun at him, knowing that he doesn't like it, especially when he asks about his sister.
"Wouldn't it be nice if we become in-laws? We can be brothers for real!" Han annoys him more.
"I'm going to say this once and for all, I don't want to become in-laws with any of you," Chan firmly remarks and then crosses his big arms together.
"So that means you're okay with us dating..." Han relentlessly annoys him with a smirk dance on his face.
Jeongin drops his head into his hands and shakes his head witnessing the interaction while Jinnie is quietly giggling with her cup of tea in hand.
"How am I going to survive not seeing you guys for weeks?" Jinnie sadly says with a pout.
"Not me. I'll manage," Jeongin coyly says, reclining on his seat while playing with his hair.
"We'll see each other soon," Han assures her this time.
Jinnie smiles and cups her cheeks with both hands, "I can't wait to see you all," she says.
There's a moment of silence but the comfortable kind and not conjure any questions, everyone lets it go on for another moment before it gets to the time to end the video meeting.
"See you guys soon," Jinnie says, blowing air kisses through the camera.
"See you guys. Don't miss me," Han says with a sly grin on his face.
"There's no being late," Chan warns a specific someone.
"Jeongin, don't be late!" Han averts the blame to Jeongin.
Jeongin shakes his head again and raises his hand at everyone, "Bye, everyone!"
"See you guys in a few weeks," Chan says, waving his hands close to the camera then ends the video meeting.
-
A FEW WEEKS LATER
When you asked Chan if you could tag along on their road trip, he said no for what you guessed these two reasons: one, he hates seeing you around the boys and two, he hates for you to see him act around the girl he likes.
But, of course, in the end, he said yes for one solid reason: because you're his sister and he can't say no to you.
It's so obvious that Chan is nervous and you guess it's because he's going to meet the friends he hasn't met in weeks and more importantly, a certain someone that he secretly misses but can't tell.
As Chan's little sister, you notice these kinds of things, the change of attitude or how he gets nervous all of a sudden.
"Unclench your jaws, Chris," you remind him.
"I'm not—" he stops himself from talking and does as you told him, unclenching his jaws.
He may have unclenched his jaws but now his shoulders tense up. You take matters into your own hands and push his shoulder down.
"You're way too nervous to see a friend," you poke fun at him.
"Shut up!" He spews out and you know it's coming out of his nervous system.
Everyone knows that Chan likes Jinnie and he's always been for only God knows how long, you guess you're not the only one annoyed by the fact that they're not dating yet because they're just so perfect for each other.
"Okay, shutting up now," you say, making a gesture of zipping your lips together to not let the scary mad Chan come out.
The car makes a turn toward an apartment building and Chan parked it next to the entrance. It seems like Jinnie has been waiting for his arrival, she comes rushing down the stairs from the second floor where her apartment is.
"Oh, my God! Chris!!!" She excitedly comes up to him with open arms
Chan is obviously as excited to see her and catches her right into his arms, he even lifts her off the ground for a moment and gives her a spin.
They're so stinking cute that you can't help but smile watching them through the rearview mirror.
"Good to see you!" She says once he puts her down.
"Good to see you too," Chan says back while holding her hands in his.
When you deem that it's the right moment to insert yourself into the scene, you get out of the car and slowly make an entrance.
They're so immersed in each other that you hesitate to burst their cute little bubble.
"Hi!" You awkwardly wave your hand at her.
Jinnie's face lights up when she sees you, "Oh, hi! Long time no see!"
You come up to her to exchange a hug with her, "Long time no see, indeed."
The fact that she, possibly, would become your sister-in-law doesn't bother you at all, Jinnie is as perfect as one can be. She's beautiful and kind, the nicest human you've ever known, you couldn't be happier if that becomes true.
"I hope you don't mind that I brought her along," Chan says, flashing a thin smile at you.
You shoot him a side eye in return and stay by Jinnie's side.
"Are you kidding? I'm happy that I have a girl companion," she says, pulling you close to her side and squeezing on your shoulder.
"Jinnie, do you mind if I use your bathroom?" You ask, getting the urge to pee all of a sudden.
"Not at all. I'll take you—"
"That's okay. I know where to go," you kindly refuse her help to show you where her bathroom is.
That way, you can give them another moment to catch up with each other. As you climb the stairs to Jinnie's apartment, you see how Chan is grinning from ear to ear and it seems like it will stay like that until the road trip ends. Maybe that's also another reason why he agreed to let you join the road trip, Chan needs a good wingman by his side.
-
The moment he got out of the taxi, Han immediately thanked Jeongin non-stop.
"Thank you Yang Jeongin," he says, calling Jeongin by his full name.
"If you didn't pick me up, I'd be dead late," he grumbles, lowering his voice as he's a bit ashamed to admit it.
"I just knew you'd be late," Jeongin says while hoisting the strap of his backpack higher on his shoulder.
Han hurriedly puts on a smile to greet his friends, acting like he almost got here late for the road trip. He sees his two friends, Chan and Jinnie putting their stuff in the back of the car.
"Rejoice everyone. Your favorite boy is here!" Han announces his arrival while walking in big, confident strides.
Chan and Jeongin just leer at him and Jinnie is the only one giving him a proper welcome.
"It's so nice that everyone's here!" She exclaims, smiling even brighter than the scintillating sun.
She gathers everyone into a circle and puts her arms around Han and Chan's shoulders.
"I missed you guys," Jinnie says, jumping on her feet like a child. She really is the special glue that sticks them all together.
Deep down, everyone feels the same way, Han must say it feels good to reunite with them, it evokes the same feeling of coming home. They're huddling together for a big group hug, relishing that longing for each other.
Han breaks away first to take the last empty spot on the trunk for his backpack, "Dibs!"
Chan and Jeongin groan in unison but at the same time, not surprised to see this display of childish behavior from Han. Chan continues organizing everyone's stuff in the trunk with Jeongin's help while Han comes around the car.
"I'm riding shotgun!" Han shouts, calling dibs for the passenger's seat.
Jinnie appears from behind the car, "I think Chan's sister will ride shotgun," she informs.
Han thinks he misheard her, he lingers by the car door and turns to ask her, "Who?"
"Chan's sister, she's coming with us for the— oh, there she is!" Jinnie points at the stairs.
Han's eyes are following where she's pointing and turns his head that way.
"Oh, everyone's here!" You say as you look at everyone from the top of the stairs.
Time suddenly goes so slowly as you descend the stairs, softly smiling as the gust of wind blows your way, sending your hair flying, and with the sun shining down at you, it creates a halo around your head.
Jeongin accidentally bumps him as he opens the car door, "sorry," he shortly says.
Han is completely gobsmacked to care, his eyes just can't stop following you even after you arrive at the base of the stairs and walk up to the car.
"I think it's true," Han foolishly says with a gaping mouth.
"Huh? What?" Jeongin asks in confusion.
"When the love is real... it finds a way," Han dramatically sighs with eyes big and wide like seeing something so wondrous.
Jeongin gives him the side eyes, but he decides to ignore him and gets into the car.
"I'm going to lock my apartment first," Jinnie informs, going up the stairs to her apartment.
"Hi, Han," you greet him.
Han tries not to crumble hearing you calling his name and instead of answering, he awkwardly raises his hand at you with a stupid grin on his face.
"Are you sitting in the front?" You ask.
Han's brain is not well functioning yet and it takes more time for him to compute a word.
"Well, then I'm going to take my bag," you say, stepping forward and getting in between him and the car door to take your bag from the passenger's seat.
The smell of your perfume is sweet and soft yet it's enough to get him intoxicated, he wants more of it. He suddenly has no desire to ride a shotgun and arranges a new plan in his head.
He rushes to the back of the car and yanks at Jeongin's jacket, "Jeongin, get in the backseat!"
"What?" He asks in utter confusion.
"Get in the backseat! Hurry!" He urges him, opening the seat to the back so he can move.
Doesn't want to deal with him, Jeongin reluctantly moves to the back as requested and Han sets the seat right back up, then keeps the car door open for you.
"Get in," Han says to you.
"Oh, thank you," you mutter, carrying your bag in one hand as you get in.
Noticing Jeongin in the backseat, you smile and greet him, "Hi!"
"Hi," Jeongin sheepishly says to you.
Han sees that Jinnie has returned from locking her apartment and hurriedly opens the car door for her, "You can sit in the front, Jinnie."
Jinnie looks at him, perplexed, "I thought you are..."
He can't hear the rest of what she's saying as he gets into the car and sits next to you.
"I hope it's okay that I tag along for the road trip," you say, putting your bag on your lap.
Han realizes that he should get his act together and forces his brain to function, "It's more than okay," he says with a smile.
This road trip turns into a chance of a lifetime for him. What could be more fun than being stuck in a moving vehicle with a girl he likes?
Chan gets into the driver's side, sighing as he's exhausted from arranging the trunk, and puts the keys into the ignition.
Oh, fuck, Han forget about the part that her brother is in the mentioned moving vehicle too, and drives it. Now, his sense of protection is heightened after seeing you sitting next to him.
"What's with this seat arrangement?" He asks, glaring at Han through the rearview mirror.
He innocently shrugs while Jeongin is staying quiet in the backseat by himself, enjoying the spacious seat for himself.
Jinnie is the last to enter the car and lets out a delighted sigh once she buckles her seat belt. She then looks around at the people in the back and asks, "Everyone is ready to go?"
In response to her question, Jeongin raises a thumbs-up while Han is weakly cheering with his fists in the air and you're laughing at him.
Jinnie then turns her head at Chan and says, "Let's go!"
And just like that, the road trip begins.
-
Everyone else thinks that Han's liking toward you is just a joke and he does that as a way to annoy Chan. Unfortunately, it's not.
He admits that at first, he didn't think of you that way. The very first time he received the information that Chan has a sister, he thinks of you not more than that, a younger sister of his friend.
That night Chan invited everyone to the bar to celebrate his birthday and you've recently turned 21 that year which is why your brother finally took you along with him to hang out with his friends for the first time and he believes that was when things take a different turn.
Han met you once, briefly at Chan's graduation and you've just entered college at that time. When he met you again that night, he almost couldn't recognize you because you've grown so much.
You were just a young girl when he met you for the first time and that night, he saw that girl had flourished into a grown woman and attracted him immediately.
He was so deeply mesmerized by you that he just stared at you the whole night that Jeongin had to constantly snap him out of his head.
The one moment that got him enamored is when you decided to take your jacket off that night and revealed the white camisole you wore that night, he could tell you were wearing nothing underneath because your nipples were poking through the silky fabric. He remembers watching you enjoy the night and dancing your heart out with Jinnie the whole night.
Han couldn't get you out of his head ever since, he grew some sort of infatuation with you, and he followed you on your social media.
When he feels bold enough, he slides into your DMs and asks how you're doing. Chan doesn't know and the fact that he's still oblivious about it means that you don't mention it to him and that's good, it spares him from his doom coming sooner than everyone else's.
Now that he gets to see you in person, sitting side by side when all he could do was just admire you through the pictures you posted. It feels a little surreal that he has to pinch himself a few times to convince him that you're real.
Since Chan is busy talking with Jinnie in the front, he takes it as an opportunity to talk with you because he's wasted three hours secretly staring at you.
"So, how are you doing?" He awkwardly asks while still getting used to sitting next to you.
"I'm doing great," you shortly answer, placing your hand on the space between you and him.
"I heard you're working at the magazine now?" He asks, making it sounds like he heard it from Chan but he actually knew it from your Instagram post.
"Yes, I am," you answer with a sheepish smile.
"I think that's great!" He praises and tries to keep his excitement in check.
"I'm just a copy editor for now. I don't think it's that great," you sheepishly say.
"No, I think that's great," Han feels the need to convince you so he seeks validation from a third party, "Right, Jeongin?"
Jeongin scratches his chin and stifles a nod, "Yeah. That's great!"
"Thank you," you mutter with a shy smile and tuck your hair behind your ear, "How about you? How are you doing?
"Good," he shortly answers but he knows you need more from his answer, "I've been working on a few tracks."
When it comes to you, Han doesn't feel like the coolest person but the objective remains the same, he wants to impress you.
"And I worked on that thing," he scratches his head while considering whether it's right to share it with you.
You tuck your hair behind your ear and look at him, "Worked on what?"
"I made this jingle for an ad," he hesitantly shares.
You shift your body toward him and ask further, "Do I know this ad or...?"
Seeing that you're genuinely curious about it, Han gains a little confidence to share more.
"It's for a shaving cream commercial and it goes like this..." Han starts humming the melody and serenading it to you.
"Didn't you do that thing last year though?" Jeongin interrupts his serenading with a truth bomb.
Han looks over his shoulder and glares at him, making Jeongin see his displeased expression that he's not a great wingman at the moment.
"Yeah, but..." he turns his body more to look at him but can't find something to defend himself.
"I did that," he continues as his confidence deflates in each passing second, "nonetheless."
"Everyone," Jinnie says from the front, "We're going to stop for gas."
Even Jinnie makes a better wingman than Jeongin and she's clueless about what happened in the back earlier.
"Oh, great timing! I need to go to the bathroom," you exclaim, gathering your hair to put it into a ponytail.
This is not a good start, he can tell that you're not impressed at all and far from attracted to him. He consoles himself with snacks, eating them right outside the convenience store.
"I blew that up," he sighs, then shoves chips into his mouth.
"That's because," Jeongin says, then pausing to take another sip of his soda, "you keep staring at her like a creep."
Han elbows his side quite hard that Jeongin yelps, "and you didn't help at all," he grumbles with his cheeks full of food.
"You're hopeless," Jeongin easily replies and steals some chips from Han.
"And you didn't think that's why I need the help?" Han grumbles again and shoves more chips into his mouth.
Jeongin coyly shrugs as he drains his can of soda empty then proceeds to crumple it and toss it into the trash bin.
"Hey, what are you guys having?" You appear from the corner along with Jinnie.
"Where's Chris?" Jinnie asks while fixing her hair.
"He's inside," Jeongin points to the convenience store.
Han quickly swallows everything in his mouth and brushes the crumbs on the front of his shirt, "Do you want some?" He offers you his bag of chips.
"Do you have something sweet with you?" You ask.
"I do, I do," he eagerly answers, rummaging through the bag of snacks he bought and pulling out a pack of strawberry jellies, "I think you'll like this."
"Oh, no, I'm allergic to strawberries," you inform.
Han quickly pulls out another pack of snacks from the plastic bag, "How about this?"
You take it from him and delightfully gasp, "Oh, I love these."
Chan comes out with Jinnie carrying packs of drinks for everyone and without warning, he tosses the car keys at Jeongin, fortunately, he has a good reflex and catches it right into his hand.
"Your turn to drive," Chan says to Jeongin.
Jeongin doesn't say anything else but walks up to the car with everyone following him from the back.
Han opens the car door for you when Chan grabs your hand and stops you on the track, "You ride shotgun."
"Yes, sir!" You also obey without complaint.
"And you," Chan points at Han, "Get on the backseat!"
Han frowns that Chan purposely separates the two of you and reluctantly goes to sit by himself in the back while Chan and Jinnie sit in the middle.
From the back of the car, Han can only watch you share the pack of chocolate maltesers with Jeongin in the front.
-
After four hours of driving, the car stops for dinner and everyone gets so quiet once the food arrives.
Chan makes sure everyone has finished so he can have all of their attention as he explains what the next plan is. Before you can ask for his dessert, he slides his plate towards you.
"Can I have everyone's attention?" He says.
Jeongin is mindlessly stirring his glass of soda with the straw but putting his attention on him meanwhile Han is slowly dissociating so Chan snaps his fingers right in front of his face to reel him back to reality.
Han swats his hand away and groans, "I'm listening, I'm listening."
"Okay, so, we're not going to continue to drive," Chan announces.
"Oh? We're sleeping somewhere for the night?" Jinnie asks, then dabs her mouth with a napkin, "And I need you guys to sleep early tonight because—"
"Because of what?" Han asks as he lazily brushes his hair to the back.
Chan sighs because Han cuts him off instead of letting him continue talking, "Because we have to leave early tomorrow morning."
"And where are we going?" You ask, sliding the plate back to him. Chan glares at you for leaving a small piece of dessert for him and you grin at him in return.
"Let me guess, surprise?" Han says with a mocking grin.
Chan scoops the last piece of cake into his mouth and ignoring Han's insinuation, he has a way to get back to him.
"Who voted for Han to pay the bill?" He says with his hand already raised in the air and Jeongin is the next one to raise his hand.
"W-what? Why? Why me?" Han blabbers in a slight panic.
Everyone turns their heads at Jinnie and since two of his friends already voted for him, she follows the majority and hesitantly raises her hand.
"Sorry," she meekly mutters at Han.
When it comes to you, you hurriedly shake your head and refuse to be a part of their shenanigans. Chan intensely glares at you, pressuring you to also raise your hand.
"Please, leave me out of this," you plead.
Having no other way to make you do what he tells you to do, Chan grabs your hand and raises it in the air. He then triumphantly grins at Han until his dimples sunken into his cheeks.
"Everyone says 'Thank you, Han'!" He orders.
"Thank you, Han!" Everyone says in unison while Han is slumped on his seat, suddenly not looking drowsy anymore.
With the information gained from the restaurant staff, Chan easily found the motel a ten-minute drive away. Arrive there, he immediately goes to check in while everyone is getting their belonging from the trunk.
Without saying anything, Jeongin hands you a bag and you look at it for a moment until you realize that it's yours.
"Oh, thank you," you mutter.
You also take Chan's bag, it's so heavy and you bet he's taking his laptop and camera with him which only reminds you to be careful with it. Once he gets back with the room keys, you hurriedly hand him his bag.
"This one is for the ladies," Chan hands one of the keys to Jinnie.
"Got it," Jinnie says, linking her arm with you to start walking to your room.
Everyone is heading the same way since the boys are staying in the next room. You can't wait to lie down after spending more than ten hours sitting in the car.
"It seems like we're sharing the bed," Jinnie says, seeing there's only one bed in the room.
"Don't worry, I don't snore like my brother," you immediately remark as you throw yourself onto the bed and sigh in delight.
Jinnie laughs as she unpacks her bag, "Wait... Chris snores?"
You roll to the side and prop a hand under your head, "I thought you knew," you say.
"I've seen Chris sleeping but he didn't snore," Jinnie shares, taking clean clothes out of her bag.
"Of course," you talk to yourself, Chan wouldn't let his crush know about his sleeping habit especially something as bad as snoring.
"What's that?" Jinnie asks, hearing you mutter to yourself.
"I just remember I need to charge my phone," you lie, rolling over to the other side to rummage through your bag.
"Do you mind if I use the bathroom first?" Jinnie politely asks, holding her clothes close to her chest.
"Sure," you answer with your hand still groping around to look for your phone charger. Getting hopeless, you call for Jinnie as she's about to enter the bathroom.
"Hey, Jinnie, can I borrow your charger?"
She stops on her track and then puts her clothes on top of the dresser, "Sure," she says, going back to her bag to get it and give it to you.
"I think I dropped my phone in the car," she mutters as she looks through her bag.
"Oh, no," you mumble but an idea comes to mind.
"I can call Chris to help you find it," you offer, turning her misfortune into an opportunity to set them up.
"No, it's okay. It's probably under the seat of the car," she says but she looks worried.
"Are you even sure that you dropped it in the car?" You ask, making her doubt herself.
Jinnie looks concerned now that she clasps her hands together in front of her, "I don't want—"
Before she gets to finish her sentence, you hit call on Chan's number and he picks up on the third ring.
"What's up, baby sist?" He slurs his words, he's just as tired as everyone.
Without greeting him first, you talk straight into the phone, "Jinnie dropped her phone in the car. Can you help her find it?"
You hear rustles from the other end of the call and his tone changes all of a sudden, "Just need to get my car keys and I'll be on your door in a minute."
There's no need to plead or beg, you only need to mention Jinnie's name and he's ready to do anything, he'd probably move mountains for her too if she asked for it.
You hold the urge to laugh and calmly look at Jinnie, "He'll be here soon," you tell her.
"Oh, thank you," Jinnie says, canceling her plan to wash up and putting her sweater back on.
A few minutes later, the knocking comes on the door and Jinnie goes to open it. You peek from the side to watch the interaction.
"Heard you dropped your phone in the car," Chan says to her.
"Yeah, I hope I didn't disturb you," Jinnie says.
"Not at all," he immediately says.
Jinnie looks at you and you pretend to be busy looking at your phone, "Hey, I'm going out for a bit."
"Yeah, sure, take your time," you say with a smile then realize that you're not using the right tone.
"Hope you find your phone," you quickly add.
Jinnie is trailing behind Chan as they walk back to the parking lot and he hurriedly unlocks the car at the first sight of it.
"I'm sure it's somewhere in the middle seat," Jinnie says, opening the car door and going straight to feel the gap between the seats.
"I'll look from the other side," Chan says.
He walks around the car and looks from the other side, he turns on the flashlight from his phone and shines it under the seat. All he finds are candy wrappers and he knows who the culprit is.
"Let's get these seats up," he suggests, turning the lever to fold the seats and making it easier to search for the phone.
As they're busy looking for the phone, their heads meet in the middle, and bumps against each other. Chan reflexively reaches for Jinnie's head and rubs on it.
"I'm sorry," he says while giggling, "Are you okay?"
Jinnie can't answer as she's busy laughing and after taking a breath, she nods, "I'm okay."
"You know, it'll be much easier to call you," he says, coming up with a faster way to find the phone a little too late.
"Why didn't I think of that earlier?" Jinnie says, feeling embarrassed as she holds her hair from curtaining her face.
Chan looks for her number and presses the call buttons, he waits for the dialing tone while Jinnie looks around in the dark.
"Oh, I heard it!" She gasps.
The muffled ringtone comes from the back and Chan flips the seat to the front, discovering Jinnie's phone caught between the seats. With his long arm, Chan outstretches his arm to get it and hurriedly hands it to her.
"Thank God!" She sighs in relief and takes the phone from him.
Chan closes the car door and quickly locks it again, he checks by pulling at the car handle to know if it's locked for good.
"I was so scared that I dropped it somewhere else," Jinnie shares, clutching her phone close to her chest.
"I'm glad you found it," Chan says, smiling because he feels good knowing that he makes Jinnie happy.
"Thank you for helping, Chris," Jinnie sincerely says with a smile that is as soft as the moonlight.
Chan would do anything to see that smile on Jinnie's face again, he then looks away before it gets too intense.
"Don't mention it," he coyly says.
As they walk back to the rooms, their hands lightly grazing each other's, and on a nice, summer night like this, Chan feels tempted to hold her hand.
He looks down and her hand is right there, a grasp away from him. All he needs to do—
Jinnie draws her hands and crosses them together in front of her, "I'm so curious where you'll take us tomorrow," she says.
Chan clears his throat and shoves his hands into the pockets of his sweatpants.
"Trust me, you guys will like it," he confidently says, "especially you."
Jinnie looks at him with a bewildered expression, "Me?"
"Yeah," he nods and grins.
"That only makes me more excited for tomorrow," she says, hugging herself tighter as a gust of wind blows their way.
Jinnie stops right in front of your shared room, she looks at Chan who's standing on the door to his room, "Thanks once again, Chris."
"It's not a big deal," he says with a smile.
Jinnie knocks on the door and a while later, you open the door with your head wrapped in a towel, "Did you find it?"
"Yeah," she answers, showing you the phone in her hand.
"That's a relief!" You exclaim, then step to the side to let her in.
Jinnie looks at Chan for one last time and smiles, "Goodnight, Chris."
"Goodnight," he says back, and once Jinnie gets inside, his foolish smile drops from his face knowing that you're watching him.
"Get back inside. Lock the door and sleep!" He strictly orders.
"Yes, sir," you reply along with a salute.
You grab the handle of the door and take one more chance to poke fun at him.
"Goodnight, Chris," You try your best to copy Jinnie's soft tone of saying it and quickly close the door before Chan gets the chance to scold you.
-
When Chan said they needed to leave early the next day, Han didn't think it would require him to wake up at 6 in the morning.
He doesn't know how Chan did that because he was the last one to sleep but he also woke up the earliest and even brought breakfast with him when he came to the room.
"Your turn to drive today," Chan says, throwing the car keys and clanging against the floor as Han fails to catch them.
"Ugh..." he lets out an exhausted groan and picks them up from the floor.
Concerned with his state, Chan grabs his shoulder and squeezes, "You sure you can drive?"
Han knows that if he says no, then Chan will take the task from him and he doesn't want that, Chan already did so much. He's sure he's more tired than everyone.
"Yeah, I can drive," he assures him with a not-so-convincing smile.
The doubts linger in Chan's eyes, he gives him a pat on the back and then says, "You know what? I'll get you another cup of coffee!"
The sun is peeking from the horizon and slowly climbs its way out, the sunray hits his eyes as Han arrives at the parking lot.
He unlocks the car from a meter away and puts his bag in the trunk first before walking to the driver's side.
"Ugh..." he groans again with one hand on the handle of the car door.
The last person who drove was Jeongin and thanks to his long limbs, Han has to readjust the seat because his arms aren't long enough for the steering wheel.
He's yawning as he takes his phone out and connects it to the car stereo, at least, being a driver means he has full control over the music.
"Morning," Jinnie cheerily says, with a smile that shines brighter than the morning sun.
Something about her smile that makes him can't help but smile back.
"Morning," he says back, "Do you need help with the bag?"
"It's okay. I'll do it myself," She says, heading to the back of the car.
Not long after, Chan comes carrying bags on each shoulder but looking unbothered by them, he ends up helping Jinnie with her bag. Jeongin comes next, handing his bag to Chan before getting into the car and sitting in the back.
Han is busy scrolling his phone to compile a playlist for the trip to realize that everyone is already getting in except for one person.
He looks to the back and sees Chan sitting in the middle with Jinnie so that means...
"I have your coffee with me," you say, climbing into the passenger's side.
He turns his head to the back to check if Chan approves of this seating arrangement but he's already snuggled up in his hoodie to sleep.
"Americano, right?" You ask, handing the cup of coffee to him.
"Oh?" Han looks at you and then at the coffee.
The second he realizes that you're waiting for him, he hurriedly gets it from you, "Thank you!"
Sensing that the coffee is hot, he carefully puts it into the cup holder and turns on the car engine. He waits until you're buckled in to start driving.
"So, where are we going?" He asks in utter confusion.
You let out a chuckle thinking that he's joking and Han chuckles as well, maybe it is a joke that he didn't ask Chan where to go before he started driving.
"Chris said you only need to follow the GPS," you inform.
"Oh, yeah, that's right," he feels embarrassed to ask and even more embarrassed to say that he is not good at multitasking.
It feels as if you read his mind, you look at him and say, "Don't worry. I'm a good navigator."
The cool morning air is so refreshing that Han doesn't feel sleepy anymore and with every sip of coffee, he feels more awake than ever.
He looks through the rearview mirror and sees that everyone in the back is sleeping so that means only you and him are awake in the car.
"Oh, wow, look at that," You sigh at the view of the sun rising on a hill, "It's beautiful!"
Han briefly glances away from the road to see it but the view he sees is of you and your hair flying around your face basking in the soft glow of the morning sun.
"Yeah, it's beautiful," he mutters and looks back at the road.
He's only an hour away from the destination but he likes this scene, the view and the road ahead of him, the person sitting next to him, also the faint music that plays through the car stereo. He wants to stay in it for a little longer.
"I love this song!" You exclaim out of the blue as the playlist plays a new song.
Han recognizes the song right away because it's coming from his playlist and it's one of his favorites.
"You know this song?"
"The Beatles, right?"
"Yes."
"It's in one of the playlists you sent me," you tell him.
The playlist is Han's love language. When he likes someone, instead of flowers or chocolate, he compiles a playlist of songs that reminds him of that person and gifts it to them.
When he sent them to you, Han isn't that confident that you will heartily listen to them because it's just a playlist of songs and you'd barely see the romantic gesture behind it.
"I'd like to be under the sea..." you start singing along to the song.
"In an octopus's garden in the shade..." Han joins in on the second line while keeping his eyes on the road.
"He'd let us in, knows where we've been. In his octopus's garden in the shade..." Together you sing the rest of the verse while smiling as the sun is getting higher in the sky.
"In an octopus's garden with you... In an octopus's garden with you..."
The GPS says the destination is only ten minutes away and it's directing him to turn onto the small road with nothing but trees that line up on each side.
"Are we going the right way?" Han asks you in a slight panic, not seeing any road signs.
You check the GPS and turn to look at him, "You're going the right way, yeah," you confirm.
Han bends down to see if there's any sign of life or if Chan accidentally puts the wrong address into the GPS.
"I'll wake my brother," you offer, turning around in your seat and outstretching your arm to reach Chan who's still sleeping.
You manage to grab the sleeve of his hoodie and yank at it, "Chris, wake up!"
Instead of Chan, Jinnie is the one who answers your call, "Mmh, are we there yet?" She asks.
"We're not sure," you answer and yank harder at Chan's hoodie.
Jinnie notices you need the help, she places her hand on Chan's arm and gently shakes him awake, "Chris?"
On the second try, Chan finally wakes up to Jinnie's call and you roll your eyes because it's getting ridiculous now that he recognizes her voice well instead of his sister.
Han decides to pull over to the side of the road and turns his head around, "are we going to the right place?"
Chan pulls down his hoodie and quickly brushes his curls to the back, he closes his eyes for a moment to adjust them to the light.
One glance at the GPS and he slumps back on his seat, "Yes, it's right," he slurs his words.
"Why am I not seeing anything else but trees?" Han hesitates but keeps driving anyway.
"Just keep going," Chan mumbles, getting a bottle of water and drinking it.
A moment later, Han's doubt is answered as a sign appears in front of him and it says that the campsite is 100 meters away.
"Oh, my God!" Jinnie loudly gasps, making everyone in the car startle in surprise, including Jeongin who's just woken up from his nap.
She looks at Chan with eyes widening and sparkling, "We're going camping?"
With a stupid grin on his face, Chan answers, "Yes."
-
While the boys are busy setting up the big tent, you and Jinnie are making sandwiches for lunch. Jinnie does most of the work while all you do is unwrapping the cheese singles and preparing the loaf of bread.
This is one of those moments that makes you think how can someone be this perfect? Jinnie is beautiful, smart, kind, and patient, she's great at drawing and now, you find out she's good at cooking too.
"What can't you do? Really?" You praise in awe as she meticulously arranges the ingredients from the vegetables to the condiments.
She lets out a shy chuckle in reaction and doesn't let it get to her head, she's concentrating hard on putting everything together without making a mess.
"You're an only child, right?" You curiously ask.
Jinnie wraps each sandwich with a food wrapper and does it so meticulously as if she's wrapping a gift, "Yes, I am."
"Would you like a younger sister?" You jokingly say.
She smiles at you and hands you the first sandwich she wrapped, "I already think of you as a younger sister," she says.
You grin at that and put the wrapped sandwich into the basket, "We should make it official then," you teasingly say.
"And what do you mean by that?"
"You know... you can be my sister-in-law," you coyly say while paying attention to her reaction.
Jinnie shakes her head in disbelief and shyly laughs, "You silly!"
It's too obvious for her to miss it, right? She should have known that you're hinting at something and it's your way to cajole her to open up but in the end, you're always the one left puzzled by the mystery of why Jinnie and Chan's ship is not sailing yet.
The peaceful nature sounds are interrupted by the sound of Chan hammering the spike to pin down the tent while Jeongin is setting the canopy. He pauses once he notices that you're struggling to carry the cooler box by yourself. He rushes to get it from you and puts it down next to the tent.
As a form of gratitude, you grab a can of soda from the cooler and hand it to him, "Here!"
Jeongin softly smiles and it's enough to make his dimples appear on both of his cheeks, "Thanks!"
"Baby sist, I want one too!" Chan grumbles as he sits on the ground, also exhausted from setting the tent.
It's fine when he called you that ten years ago but as you grow older, he should know that you've outgrown that pet name. You let it slide because his friends got used to hearing him calling you that around them.
"Catch!" You warn before tossing it his way and he catches it right in his hand.
Jinnie comes not long after, carrying the sandwiches along with some snacks on the side, "Lunch is ready!" She announces, putting everything on the table.
Han hurriedly carries more folded chairs and arranges them around the table. Everyone stops working to huddle around the table for lunch.
"Is it done?" Jinnie asks while distributing the sandwiches around.
"Yeah, we just need to put the mat and sleeping bags inside but we can do it later," Chan answers, ripping through the wrapper and taking a hearty bite.
Despite it being the beginning of summer, there are only two other campers on the site. But that's a good thing, it's not crowded and it won't spoil the serene, relaxing experience of camping.
The lunch feels so rewarding, especially to those who worked on the tent and everyone gets so quiet after. You and Jinnie work together to gather the trash and put it into a plastic bag.
"So... what now?" Jeongin asks, glancing his eyes from side to side.
Chan crumples the empty can in his hand and puts it into the trash bag, "We're resting for now and we'll go hiking in an hour."
"Hiking?" Han asks in panic, not in favor of the idea.
"I told you to bring hiking boots for one specific reason," Chan explains, putting his hat backward and then reclining on his seat.
Han slumps on his seat and makes those high-pitched groans while flailing his arms in the air.
To avoid the harsh sunlight, the hike starts a little after three and the boys are tasked to carry a backpack full of snacks, water, and clean clothes.
The forest hums with life as the five of you walk the trail with the sun breaks through the cracks, lighting up the dirt path ahead, decorated with outgrown roots, wildflowers, and fallen leaves that crunch beneath your feet.
You're gazing up at the canopy, searching for the birds that sing sweetly against the soft sound of the wind whistling between the leaves.
Chan leads the way and once in a while, he looks back to check if anyone needs a break. Seeing that everyone needs a break, he stops on his track and turns around.
"Let's have a quick break!" He announces to everyone, then uncaps a bottle of water to hand it to you.
"Thank you," you mutter.
You lean back against the tree and reorganize your breath to finally have a long sip of water that quench your thirst.
"Is it still far?" Jinnie asks, taking a new bottle of water from Han's backpack.
Chan swallows his water and wipes his lips after, "About half an hour more of hiking."
Han takes off the plaid shirt he's wearing and hangs it on one shoulder, "And how long have we been hiking?"
Chan looks at his smartwatch to be able to answer him, "About 25 minutes."
"Fuck!" Han curses, scaring away the small animals hiding between the bushes, "Why does it feel like we've been walking for hours?"
"That's just you," Jeongin sneers, drinking his water like he's shooting an advertisement video.
"It's going to be worth it, I swear," Chan convinces, brushing his hair to the back before putting his hat back on.
Hanging on to his words, everyone continues the hike, following Chan's lead while enjoying the greenery. Jeongin catches squirrels running in between tree trunks.
"Han, say hi to your friends!" He says to Han.
Funny that Han decides to play along with it, "Furry babies, hi!"
Chan notices that you're getting exhausted as beads of sweat roll down your neck, "Here! Hold the back of my t-shirt!"
You don't see why it would help you walk, "Why should I?" You ask in utter confusion.
He grabs your hands and makes you hold each side of his t-shirt, dragging you along with him as he tirelessly keeps following the trail.
"I swear to God if it isn't worth it like you said..." you grumble as you feel every muscle in your legs strained and screaming in pain, and your mouth is dry from you constantly panting, running out of breath.
The scenery slightly changes the further you walk, there are no more dead leaves on the path and the rich earthy smell is soon replaced by water-saturated air.
"Oi, look!" Chan taps your hand and then points at the view ahead of him.
Getting a glimpse of what lies ahead, you walk past Chan to discover a view that is too beautiful for your eyes to comprehend.
A white, frothy cascade of water falls into a plunge pool with mist billowing out in soft clouds, creating a mystical atmosphere but when the sun hits and refracts the lights, a rainbow appears.
It's a waterfall, a majestic one.
"Be careful! It's slippery!" Chan shouts, watching you walk down the rocky outcroppings. He knows that there's no stopping you and you can't hear him anyway.
Han dashes after you with the backpack bouncing on his back, trailing after you like a puppy.
"I was right to trust you," Jinnie stands by his side and places a hand on Chan's shoulder, "It's worth the one hour of hike."
Jinnie shoots him a warm smile that makes Chan's inside melt and turns into jelly and in response to that, Chan unknowingly grins at her, the kind that shows how much of a fool he is for her.
Unbeknownst to him, Jeongin has been quietly watching this interaction, including the shit-eating grin Chan has on his face.
"You're pathetic," Jeongin says to him once Jinnie leaves.
"Hey!" He yells in disagreement but Jeongin ignores him and walks away.
Taking a little rest from the hiking, Chan sits on the sun-baked rocks while admiring the waterfall and the serene surroundings.
"This is a beautiful place to tell someone your feelings," Jeongin says, taking out a can of soda from his backpack.
Chan scoffs and plays dumb, "I don't know what you're talking about."
"Oh, come on!" Jeongin groans and subtly rolls his eyes at him.
"We all know you have feelings for someone," he pauses to gesture at the figure standing on the rocky perch, "There she is!"
This proves two things, their years of friendship and that Jeongin always observes, either way, he feels so caught by his own ineptness.
Worse, Chan decides to keep playing dumb and looks away even though it's too late for him to do that, there's no way he can escape Jeongin's observant eyes.
"Why-why should I..." he scratches his head in a slight panic.
"Just tell her how you feel," Jeongin says, "I think she feels the same thing for you."
At first, Chan wants to keep it to himself but since Jeongin knows already and it's tiring to have to keep hiding, he decides to tell him.
"It's hard," he openly admits with a heavy sigh, "We've been close friends for too long that I can't tell the difference anymore."
It feels so good that Chan is finally able to get that out of this chest and he knows he can trust Jeongin to keep it between them.
"And she's just... she's just perfect," Chan says with a hopeless sigh, he picks up a pebble and throws it into the water, "and I don't want to lose my good friend."
Jeongin leans back by propping his hands behind him and lets out a sigh, "It doesn't matter if the guy is perfect or the girl is perfect, as long as they're perfect for each other," he eloquently remarks.
"Wait, I think I heard that somewhere before," Chan's forehead wrinkles as he rakes his brain to recall where he heard this line before.
All of a sudden, Jeongin punches him in the arm, "It's from your favorite movie. Good Will Hunting!"
"Oh?!" Chan loudly gasps, it feels like a crime that he doesn't recognize the quote taken from his favorite movie.
"At this point, Han will beat you up to it."
"What?"
"He'll date your sister faster than you get to date Jinnie," Jeongin says with sheer indignation.
Chan's eyes dart at you and Han talking under the shade of a tree that stoops so low it's almost touching the surface of the water.
"Ugh, no, that can't happen!" He says in disgust.
"I bet he's serenading your sister with the jingle he made, again," Jeongin mumbles.
At the same time, Jeongin and Chan look at each other and start singing the jingle together, surprising themselves by how well they memorized it.
"Are you guys talking about me?" Jinnie jokingly asks as she walks by.
They immediately shut up and Chan turns his head away even though his eyes are searching for her, demanding her to always be in his sight.
"Are we waiting for Christmas to swim or what?" Han shouts, fussing like a child with his hands planted on each side of his waist.
-
Han once thought that if someone ever gets to see your body, he believes they'd turn to stone and that's because he thinks no one can handle that much magnetism and sex appeal.
Today, he gets to put that notion to a test even though he's risking himself to the possibility of getting petrified. He tries to keep his cool as you stand not far from him, tugging the hem of your t-shirt and then pulling it over your head, revealing the top half of the swimsuit you're wearing underneath.
So far, he still finds himself breathing and able to move his limbs but let's see when— he holds his breath as you unbutton your denim shorts and pull it down, slightly bending down to get it off your legs.
His eyes immediately travel down your body, admiring every curve of your body as you bask in the warm sunlight and the tiny droplets of water land on your skin.
You flip your hair to the back and slip your fingers under the strap to adjust it on your shoulder, his breath hitches as you pull it and let it slap against your skin.
Now, he's petrified. He knows he shouldn't be ogling at his best friend's sister, especially with her brother around but he can't help it, he's instinctively attracted to you like a moth drawn to light.
Jinnie offers her hand at you as she's already in her swimsuit as well, "Come on!" She says.
You take her hand and giggle as you slowly make your way toward the water with pebbles against the bottom of your bare feet.
"Ack!" You shriek, feeling a shock of cold water touching your feet then back to giggling again.
Han realizes that if he doesn't want to miss anything, he should get changed now. He gets up from the bed of rock he's sitting on and finds Chan is already hallway to get naked, exposing his muscular upper body, his pale skin shines under the sun.
"Show off," he mutters, placing a gentle slap on his abs as he walks past him.
"What's that for?" Chan says with a perplexed look.
The breeze plays with Han's hair as he treads the water and more droplets of water hit his skin the closer he gets to where you are
For a second, he loses sight of you until you emerge from the surface of the water, glistening wet with your swimsuit stuck to your skin, enhancing the features of your heavenly body.
You're saying something to Jinnie as you're floating in the water but the words are lost in the roar of the waterfall. With a grin plastered on your face, he doesn't need to hear it to know you're having fun.
"Hey, come here," you shout in his direction.
Han looks around thinking you're talking to someone else but there's no one else but him there. He looks back at you and you're already making your way to him.
"I want to show you something cool," you say, taking his hand and dragging him with you.
Honestly, he's willing to go anywhere you take him even if you take him to the pit of hell and sweat he'll follow you there.
"Now, we have to dive in," you say, getting to the center of the pool where it's deep enough for a dive.
Han draws a big, deep breath before following you where you lead him, he sees through the blurry water where your figure is diving to and then comes out of the water.
You wipe the water off your face and put your hair away, "It's cool, isn't it?"
Han doesn't realize it at first but once he rubs the water off his eyes, he's standing on the other side of the waterfall, and behind him is a tall, slippery wall of rock.
It's just you and him, concealed behind an iridescent wall of water.
"Yeah," he nods as he looks at you to which you respond with a smile.
Out of nowhere, two figures emerge out of the water and startle you both. It's Jeongin and Jinnie, discovering the spot and finding you both there.
"Wow! This is amazing!" Jinnie gasps as she looks around while wiping the water off her mouth.
Jeongin doesn't say anything but stands close to the back, his skin a contrast with the dark of the rocky wall behind him.
The smile on Han's face slowly fades knowing that someone has shattered the tender moment he's having with you. He looks at you and your eyes are nowhere near his eyes, the next thing he knows, you dive your way out back to the world.
The fun continues as you and Chan team up to fight against Jinnie and Han. He's carrying you on his shoulders and clashing you at Jinnie who also rides on Han's shoulders, coming at each other until one of you falls into the water. Thanks to Chan's strong lower half body, you won most of the time.
Tired from swimming, everyone is chilling on the big bed of rock, drinking and eating the snacks they packed while drying up under the warm afternoon sun.
With your fingers pruning up, you're struggling to open a bag of chips and someone takes it to help you to open it.
"Here," Jeongin says, after swiftly opening it for you.
"Thanks," you mutter.
Jinnie let out a sigh as she hugs her knees, "I think this is the most fun I ever had in a long time."
Han gets up from lying down and puts his arm around her shoulder, "That's true."
Chan triumphantly grins as he uncaps a new bottle of water, "I told you guys to trust me."
"I trusted you," Jeongin mutters in defense.
Chan points at Han as he drinks his water, hinting that he's talking about a specific person. Grinning as he sees Han feeling called out by that.
"I didn't say anything," he defends himself, waving his hand in front of him in strong disagreement with Chan's accusation.
"Yeah but you were like whining the whole hike," Chan says, giving him a head shake of disbelief.
"I didn't," he resists to admit it, then looks at Jinnie to seek someone on his back, "I didn't, right?"
Jinnie looks at him and then looks at everyone, "Well, I wouldn't call it whining," she says.
Han glares at her as he senses a but trailing behind Jinnie's sentence. He puts his arm away from her and grumbles, "You know what? I'll not say anything on the hike way back."
On the hike way back, Han doesn't whine like he promised but he makes grunting noises. Chan knows he wants to complain but he wants to stick true to his own words.
He guides the hike back with you by his side and he's been catching you looking back a few times. He scoffs, knowing his sister so well to know that you're not just looking, you have eyes on someone.
"Who is it, baby sist?" He curiously asks.
You snap your head back and look ahead, "Huh? What?" You play coy.
With his hand on your shoulder, he stops you on your track and looks into your eyes, "I'm your brother. I know when my sister likes someone," he states.
You sigh because that's true, you can't hide the things from someone you've grown up your whole life with.
"Yeah, okay, you got me," you say in defeat.
"I didn't think much about it then but now, he's always in my head," you share, surprised that you don't find it awkward to tell personal things like this with him. Deep down you know it's not awkwardness you feel, you fear that Chan wouldn't be accepting of your choice.
"So, what do you think?"
Chan softly laughs and offers his hand at you as support to climb the outgrown tree roots, he waits until you safely land on the other side to answer.
"Well, I don't really have a say on that, do I?" he says.
"As far as I remember, you're really against it," you say, reminding him of the same ultimatum he says to his friends plenty of times.
"Yeah, but you know, as long as you're happy," he answers, along with a coy shrug.
Out of the blue, he playfully nudges your shoulder with his, "Ooo, baby sist is falling in love," he teasingly says.
You shove him hard until he's staggering to the side, "Stop calling me that!" You slap his big arm with each word.
Chan is as protective as a brother can be but he knows that he can't dictate every aspect of your life, including the person you like. However, as your brother, his opinions matter and it feels good to know that you have his approval.
-
The sun is setting when everyone returns to the campsite, painting the sky with bursts of red and yellow, gradually sending the day into the calm of night.
Before it gets dark, Chan orders everyone to work for dinner, he and Jeongin immediately build a campfire and the rest are setting the gas stove to cook.
"Can I help you with something?" Han offers his help to you and Jinnie who's busy prepping ingredients for dinner.
Jinnie hands him a pot, "Can you fill it with water?"
"How much water?"
"Just fill it full," she answers.
"Got it!" He takes the pot with him and comes back a few minutes later, carrying the pot of water with a lot of focus and cautiousness.
"Where do I put it?" He asks in a panic.
Jinnie gets out of the way to make space for him, "Here! On the stove!" She says.
He is concentrating hard on putting it right on the stove without spilling a drop, "How do you turn it on?"
You look away from the vegetables you're chopping and notice something on Han's leg, it seems like he scraped his knee without him knowing.
"Goodness, Han!" You gasp.
"Wh-what?" He asks in panic, looking at you in worry when he should be worried about himself.
"Your knee is bleeding," you point at the blood gushing out of his scraped knee. You scramble to find something for his wound.
Jinnie gets ahead of you, she comes with a bottle of water to wash the blood and tells him to sit down as she runs to the tent to get a first aid kit.
"Does it hurt?" You ask, finally find a napkin for it.
Han is surprisingly calm about it as he gently places the napkin over his wound, "I think I hurt my knee when I was getting water."
Chan pauses on grilling the meat to know what the ruckus is about, "What's going on?"
"Hannie scraped his knee," you shortly answer.
Jinne comes through with her bag of first-aid kit and pulls out a tube of ointment, she takes a dollop with a cotton bud and with so much gentleness, she dabs Han's wound with it.
Han hisses and winces in pain, reacting to the treatment and Jinnie quickly blows on it to soothe the pain.
"I just need to put a band-aid on it," she says and proceeds to take one from the pack. She puts a lot of care into covering his wound with it then sighs in relief.
"Thank you, Jinnie," Han sincerely says while holding the side of his knee.
Jinnie looks up as she's kneeling in front of him and warmly smiles, "You're very welcome, Han."
Despite the minor incident, dinner was a success as everyone finished the food in under an hour, and there was no better way to end a tiring yet fulfilling day than with cans of cold beer.
The night brings such a silence that the crackle of the campfire is all that could be heard with the sparks flickering and drifting upward. The smell of smoke mixed with the sweet smell of roasted marshmallows.
Being the good brother he is, Chan hands you the smores he made and takes the stick of marshmallow you're still roasting.
"Thanks," you mutter, wasting no time to bite into that gooey, crunchy sweetness.
Han wants to do the same for you, he makes smores out of the marshmallow he roasted a little too long and nudges Jeongin by the elbow.
"Pass it to her," he whispers, asking for his help to deliver it to you.
Jeongin doesn't say anything but takes it from him and without hesitation, he bites right into it.
"Hey, I made it for her!" He scolds him, putting his hands around Jeongin's neck to choke and force him to spit the smores he ate. That doesn't faze him, Jeongin has another bite to finish it and has no problem swallowing it down.
Thinking that Han is mad because Jeongin ate his smores, Jinnie gives the one she made to him as a consolation, "Here. You can have mine."
Han looks at it and feels bad to take it, "I– It's okay, I'm full anyway," he lies with a grin.
The night is a special kind of blackness, the kind that wants only to hold the stars and help them shine all the brighter. You tilt your head up and see those stars like pinpricks against the dark of night.
"Woah, look at those stars..." You sigh in wonder.
Everyone else follows suit, looking up at the night sky and feeling the same feeling of awe. When we realize how vast the universe is, our matters suddenly feel so small, don't you think?
"I have something to share with you guys," Jeongin suddenly announces.
Everyone stops staring at the night sky and looking at Jeongin, some are merely curious and the rest are anticipating what he tries to share.
"Remember when I told you guys I auditioned to join the Royal Orchestra?"
"Yeah, a couple of times," Chan says, bobbing his head at him.
"Last month I got the letter," he shares further.
"Oh!" Jinnie gasps in excitement even though Jeongin is not finished with the announcement yet.
Jeongin looks down at the blazing fire that gnaws on the logs of wood, making everyone wait for him to continue. After a while, he looks up and finally announces, "Well, I got in."
"Oh, my Gosh..." Chan sighs in relief with one hand clutching his chest.
"Yeah, man!" Han gives him a celebratory punch in the arm then puts his arm around him, "I just knew you'd get in."
"Duh!" Jinnie eggs in, "You're a great pianist, they're stupid if they didn't let you in."
"Congratulations, Jeongin! We're so proud of you," Chan says, giving him a pat on the back and a proud smile that exudes his paternal side towards Jeongin.
Jeongin looks at you and his eyes drop to his hands, "Which also means that I'll leave soon," he continues with shocking news.
The smiles on everyone's faces slowly fade at that announcement, it turns quiet again as everyone processes that there's a downside to this happy news. Jinnie looks devastated and she rests her head on Chan's shoulder to seek comfort.
"When do you have to leave?" Han asks.
"Next month," Jeongin replies.
"So... this will be the last time we're going to be together?" Jinnie sadly asks even though she's on the verge of tears already.
"Guys, I'm not dying," Jeongin says with an attitude.
Everyone lightly chuckles at that, Chan rearranges the logs to keep the bonfire alive and looks at Jeongin.
"How long will you be there?"
"It's a two-year contract," he answers.
Jinnie sniffles and puts on a small smile, "Just promise us that you'll always come to our weekly video meeting," she demands.
Jeongin chuckles and nods, crossing his fingers together as he says, "Promise!"
"Two years isn't that long," Han coyly says, poking the burned log with a tree branch.
"By the time I get back, I expect one of you to already be married to someone," Jeongin jokingly says, secretly throwing a glance at Chan and raising his eyebrow at him.
"I'm getting drowsy," you say, stretching your arms up and tilting your head side to side, "I'm going to head in and sleep."
Jinnie lifts her head off of Chan's shoulder and crosses her arms together in front of her, "Yeah, I'm going to sleep as well," she says.
It's getting late and the night only grows colder, Chan decides that it's time to sleep. He volunteers to put out the bonfire while Jeongin heads straight into the tent.
After taking a quick trip to the bathroom, Han enters the tent and sees that the sleeping bags have been arranged. Jinnie takes the farthest right and you're sleeping next to her, bundled in the warmth of your sleeping bag.
The middle one belongs to Chan and since Jeongin takes the farthest left which means he's going to be sleeping between them. He slips himself into his sleeping bag and turns his head only to find that you're still awake.
"I thought you're sleeping already," he lowly mutters.
You don't say anything but smile at him with your eyes soft and tender, blanketing his heart with warm feelings.
When it occurs to him that he's sleeping in this shared space with you, he gets that fluttering feeling inside, a kaleidoscope of butterflies flying around in his stomach.
"Goodnight, Han," you lowly murmur.
"Goodnight," he murmurs back, not taking his eyes off of you until you turn your head to the other side.
Han continues to admire your profile from the side, your eyes, your nose, and the plump of your lips that he's dying to taste. You're so beautiful and he gets to enjoy that beauty as much as he pleases.
"I'm surprised I didn't find you snoring already," Chan says as he enters the tent and zips it close.
Then there's the brother who always ruins this special moment. Han turns his head away and scoots slightly to the side to make more space for Chan, knowing how big he is.
"Let's see who gets to snore first," Han dares him.
The next thing he knows, Han finds himself in the forest again and he can hear you laughing. He looks up and finds you standing next to him with your hair wet and your feet bare.
"Take you somewhere..." you vaguely say.
Han doesn't answer but takes your hand, together you're walking through the forest. He feels the rough stone handholds against the palms and fingertips and tall lush grass sliding across calves.
Then he looks at you and you're smiling at him, your eyes bright and droplets of water are dripping down the end of your hair.
"It's cool," you say, laughing at him.
He thinks you find something funny about him so he starts to grope his body around and checks what is it that makes you laugh.
"Come here," you say, giggling with your hand still holding his.
"What?" He asks.
"It's cool," you say again, then you take the straps of your swimsuit and pull them down your shoulders. You're giggling while keep pulling the straps down, revealing your bare chest to him little by little until—
"Han, wake up!"
The image blurs as someone shakes his body awake. He ignores it and tries to go back to sleep, hoping that he gets to continue the dream.
"Wake up!"
"Ugh... mmh," he incoherently complains and curls up in his sleeping bag.
"Just let him sleep," you say to someone.
Han's eyes snap open the second he hears your voice, he then scrambles out of his sleeping bag, disoriented with his hair tousled.
"Are you coming?"
Without looking, Han can tell that it's Chan's voice.
"I'm coming, yes, coming," he mumbles with half-shut eyes.
He shivers as cold air blows into the tent, he gropes around for his jacket with eyes barely open, "What time is it?"
"It's four," Chan answers.
"In the afternoon?" He gasps in shock, can't believe that he slept through the day.
"In the morning," Chan corrects him.
It's even more shocking that he wakes up at four in the morning when the sun is not even out yet. He opens his mouth to complain but he sees you coming into the tent.
"Chris, can I borrow one of your hoodies?" You ask.
Han grabs what he assumes is his hoodie and hurriedly gives it to you, "You can wear mine," he offers with a sleepy smile.
Chan takes it from his hand and then gives it to you, "Hurry up! It's sunrise in any minute now," he rushes him.
Han is barely functioning but he tries to keep up with the group, walking through the path in the dark of the night that still lingers and the stars that insist on shining bright against the bruised sky.
He rushes to walk next to you while hugging himself to shield himself from the cold, "Where are we going?"
"Just to the top of that hill," you answer, looking beautiful even with your face bare and your eyes puffy from the lack of sleep.
It gets tricky as the path turns into climbing the rocky outcroppings and it's a bit embarrassing that you're the one helping him not the other way around.
"There she is," Chan says, pointing to the golden disk that rises on the horizon with its honeyed glow.
It is the time when the day casts away the cloak of night and makes an entrance with a bright, gold light of warmth, making it known that she rules the day once and forever more.
Jinnie walks up to Chan's side and stands so close to him, arms brushing and elbows grazing.
"It's like you have to whisper," Jinnie murmurs, thinking that she would disrupt the serene view by talking loudly.
When Chan looks at her, he realizes one thing. Jinnie is like the sunrise, she doesn’t care if anyone watches it or not, she will keep on being beautiful, even if no one bothers to look at it.
"You know what, Chris?" She suddenly asks.
"Yes?"
"This is one of those moments that I'll share with my future husband and children," she says, her eyes set on the sun that keeps on rising, gently and swiftly at once.
Hearing her talking about the future makes Chan wants to make it all true for her and have the chance to tell her future children, 'Yes, Dad was there too'. Just the thought of it already makes him so giddy that he finds himself smiling.
Jinnie slowly rests her head on his shoulder to enjoy the sunrise together and Chan gets what she said earlier, he also feels like saying things out loud would only ruin the moment so he decides to keep it in his heart a little longer.
"Ugh! He's stressing me out," You mutter to yourself, seeing Jinnie and Chan sharing an intimate moment and instead of using this as an opportunity to say something, Chan does nothing but stare at her like usual.
"That's my hoodie," Someone says.
You turn to the side and find Jeongin there, "Sorry?"
"You're wearing my hoodie," he says, pointing to the hoodie you're wearing which you thought belonged to Han.
"I'm sorry. I didn't know," you meekly say, torn between keeping it on or not, but you know you need it, it's so cold to take it off.
"That's okay," Jeongin says, leaning on the rock next to you.
It's hard to interact with Jeongin because he rarely talks, he only talks when he has important things to say or has savage takes on things. You hesitate to talk to him without feeling like you'll waste his time. Still... you muster up the courage only to get interrupted by Han's head lolling onto your shoulder.
You check on him and see that he's falling back to sleep. You quickly put your arm around him to keep the back of his head from hitting the rock.
"We should have let him sleep," Jeongin says.
"Yeah," you respond with a soft laugh.
Now that he's speaking to you, you use this as an opportunity to congratulate him, "I didn't get the chance last night but congratulations for joining the Royal orchestra," you tell him.
Jeongin brushes his hair to the back and then clears his throat, "Thank you."
"I went to one of your shows two months back," you share and instantly regret doing it, what are you expecting though? For him to thank you.
"Why didn't you tell me?" Jeongin asks, he seems to find it important to know the reason.
"Well, I just... I don't know, I don't want to disturb you and I was with a friend anyway so..." you vaguely explain.
There's no other reason why you came to his show except to watch him playing his piano, you thought of seeing him after the show but you were afraid that he'd be too busy for that.
"We could have hung out. I'd treat you to dinner," he says while scratching his ear.
"That sounds nice," you comment with a smile.
"I'm not a cheapskate like Han," he jokingly adds with a soft laugh.
"Well, I was think— Oh!" You abruptly stop talking as Han nuzzles his head further into your neck and puts his arm across your chest.
Jeongin gets on his feet and makes you switch places with him. He takes Han's arm from around your shoulder, offering himself for him to lean on instead of you.
"Is Han sleeping?" Chan asks, noticing his friend is draping on Jeongin's shoulder.
"I told you to let him sleep," you grumble at him.
The walk back isn't as bad as the climb, Han is being dragged by Chan to make sure of his safe return to the campsite. Jeongin is tasked to brew coffee for everyone while Jinnie and Chan are making breakfast together. You volunteer to tidy up the tent and fold the sleeping bags.
Once you're done, you join everyone around the campfire and Jeongin immediately hands you a cup of coffee.
"Thank you," you mutter, holding it with both hands to absorb the heat.
Chan mischievously slaps Han's shoulder, startling him awake from his sleep and making him jolt on the chair.
"Time for breakfast!" He informs him.
He looks at him with wondering eyes, stretches his arms out, and then lets out a big yawn. Even with a barely functioning brain, Han knows that it's time to eat, he takes a plate and a piece of toast.
"Here. Have an egg," Jinnie says, sliding an egg onto his plate from the frypan.
She then turns at you and says, "You too."
You hurriedly grab a plate and mutter your gratitude at her, wasting no time to start digging in. Soon, everyone is stuffing their mouth with food and it gets quiet that you can hear the forest come alive around you.
"We're going to drive the whole day today," Chan informs out of nowhere.
"Can we know where we're going now?" Jinnie asks, taking a bite of her bread.
Chan pulls out something out of his jeans pocket, a piece of paper but he continues to unfold it open. With an excited grin, he turns it around and reveals a poster.
"How long have you been keeping that poster in the back of your jeans?" Jeongin curiously asks, then takes a small sip of his coffee.
Not getting the reaction he expected, Chan frowns and his shoulders slumped. Han snatches the poster from his hands and looks at it with utter bewilderment.
"What? Did you get tickets to this? How?" He asks with his cheeks full of food.
You don't recognize it at first until you see the logo of the band and gasp in surprise, "Am I seeing The Hare concert poster?"
The grin blooms on Chan's face once more, "More like the poster for their secret gig this Friday night," he humbly brags.
"What?" You ask again with eyes widening.
Han roughly yanks the sleeve of Chan's sweater, "How did you get the tickets?"
"Let's say I knew someone who knows someone," Chan cryptically says, deciding not to tell everyone how he acquired those tickets.
"Anyway, I think it's better if the girls take turns to drive first," he continues with the planning.
"Yep. It's best if you boys get some rest before driving all night," Jinnie agrees, already collecting the trash from around the table.
You're representing everyone when you say that Jinnie and Chan make a great team, they're the ones who came up with the planning and handled the financial stuff, and they make sure everyone is doing well and having fun. They're basically playing parents to you, Han, and Jeongin which adds one more reason why they should date as soon as possible.
-
Jinnie offers to take the first turn to drive and Chan is the last one to get into the car as he has to return the rented tent and pay for it.
"Everyone please make sure you've checked your belongings," Chan says as he puts his safety belt on.
Jinnie turns on the car engine and checks everything, her safety belt, and the angle of the rearview mirror, and then adjusts the seat.
"Do you mind if I play music from my phone?" You ask.
"Not at all," Jinnie replies, tucking her hair behind her ear as she backs the car from the parking lot and starts driving.
Not long after the car driving through the main road, Han startles in the backseat and then asks, "How long have we been driving?"
Chan glances at his smartwatch and turns his head to the back, "About 35 minutes. Why?"
"I want to pee," Han says, his face doesn't show any expression but it makes his face appear so round.
"Can you hold it?" Chan asks.
Han considers it for a moment then slowly leans back on his seat, "Yeah, I'll– I'll hold it," he doubtfully says.
"Distract yourself, you know, think of something so you don't want to pee anymore," Chan suggests.
"Think of the waterfall we went to yesterday," Jeongin playfully adds with a suppressed laugh.
"Hey!" Chan slaps Jeongin's arm, saying the opposite of what he suggested.
"I'll try to sleep," Han finds a better solution to detain his urge to pee.
"That's a great idea!" Chan says.
It's a good thing that Han is one of those people who can sleep anytime anywhere. He manages to sleep through two hours long of drive until the urge comes back.
"Guys, I don't think I can hold it anymore," he mutters, biting his lower lip until it turns pale.
Jinnie looks at him through the rearview mirror and sees how he can't hold the urge anymore, "The sign says rest area is only 10 kilometers away," she informs.
Han grips the headrest of Jeongin's headrest, "Okay."
"Are we good?" Jinnie asks.
"Yeah," he meekly answers.
"Just a few more minutes," you convince him.
There's nothing you can do to help him but you can relate to that feeling, you look back to check on him once in a while.
"Jinnie?" He calls again.
"Yeah?"
"Please step on the gas!" Han says, looking a little pale now.
Considering the urgency of the situation, Jinnie allows herself to go above the speed limit, she steps on the gas and the car picks up the speed, launching the car forward.
Sensing the change in speed, Chan wakes up from his nap and looks around in confusion. But the first thing he does when he gains his sense is check on Jinnie.
"What's wrong?" He asks.
"Han needs to pee," you answer for her since she focuses on driving.
"Almost there!" Jinnie says as she changes the lane to enter the rest area.
Han hops out of the car once the car gets to the parking lot of the rest area and immediately runs to search for the bathroom.
Once the car is parked, Jinnie lets out a sigh and leans back on her seat, "That was the most intense ten minutes I ever had in my life," Jinnie says.
Seeing the hilarity of it all, the three of you burst into laughter almost at the same time, making it one of those memorable little things that happened on this road trip.
The laughter wakes Jeongin up from his nap and he looks confused as to why everyone is laughing, "What's happening?"
No one is answering him but keep laughing until we're running out of air. Oh, there's nothing like the deep breaths after laughing that hard. 
-
Since they're stopping at a rest area and it's close to lunchtime, they may as well take a break from driving to ear. Everyone scatters the second they step into the food court to order the food they want. You decide on a bowl of ramen and get in the queue with Jinnie behind you.
Even though he's already carrying a tray of food in his hands, Chan stops next to the queue and scans the menu.
"Hey, baby sist!" He loudly calls you.
The people in the queue turn their heads to see who he calls baby sist, you hurriedly turn your back to them and glare at Chan.
"Please don't address me with that name in public," You scold him through your gritted teeth.
"Order a portion of fried dumplings for me," he says, ignoring your complaint and leaving with a grin.
Everyone gathers at one of the long tables in the middle of the food court with their choices of lunch, you slide the plate of fried dumplings at Chan and steal one piece with your chopsticks.
"You better not drink a lot of sodas if you have a weak bladder," Jeongin and his savage intake make an appearance.
Han pretends not to hear him and continues to stuff his cheek with more food.
The lunch is not enough, so everyone scatter once more to buy snacks. You're getting a bag of mini fish-shaped cakes for desserts and Han appears behind you with a big smile on his face.
"Got you ice cream," he says.
"How nice of you!" You delightfully exclaim.
"I don't know what you like so I chose three flavors at once," he explains the different flavors of ice cream in one cone.
"Thank you," you mutter your gratitude with a smile.
"I have to go for another bathroom break," he says with a grin lingering on his face, then leaves the other way.
The ice cream would make a great dessert if it didn't have strawberry ice cream in the mix. It's obvious that Han completely forgot that you're allergic to it, you can't eat it, or throw it away. You can give it to Chan but Han would know that you're not eating the ice cream he specifically bought for you and he would find that disrespectful, or worse, upset him.
Making your way out of the food court, you carry the bag of snacks in one hand and the ice cream in the other, still have no idea what to do with it.
Out of nowhere, Jeongin comes from the side, also carrying an ice cream in hand. He takes the one from your hand and switches it with him, a chocolate-flavored one.
"You can have mine," he says, not waiting to bite right into the ice cream.
Not only that he remember your allergy, but he also comes with a new ice cream and you find that endearing. You let out a mix of scoff and laugh, "I've never seen someone bite into ice cream."
"Well, there's always a first time to everything," he coyly says.
-
It's your turn to drive now and thankfully, you have set up an hour-long playlist for it. Jinnie remains in the front, sitting on the passenger's side and putting her legs up as she draws on her sketchbook.
The boys don't find it hard to fall back to sleep after a hearty lunch, you lower the volume of the music and only hum along to the song currently playing in the car to not wake the sleeping beauties in the back.
"What do you think?" Jinnie asks, holding her sketchbook out to you.
You keep the steering wheel steady to glance at the rough drawing of you from her point of view, then look back straight ahead.
"Wow. That's good!" You compliment.
Jinnie is a great illustrator, she mostly does illustrations for children's books and magazines which explains her exceptional talent for drawing.
"Please tell me you'll finish it and then email it to me," you say, already planning on making it your profile picture for your social media.
"I'll finish it when I'm not in a moving vehicle," she says, putting her pencil back into its case and putting it on the dashboard along with the sketchbook.
"I think it's cute," Jinnie says while stretching her arms to the front.
"What cute?" You ask with a perplexed smile.
"The way Chris calls you baby sist," she answers.
Oh, she must be talking about that little incident that happened back at the food court. You nod and tap your steering wheel to the rhythm of the song playing.
"Look, I don't mind when call me that in front of you guys. Just don't do it in front of a bunch of strangers," you explain, briefly shifting your focus to driving by a big truck.
"I mean... what if there are cute guys there and they heard it," you playfully remark.
Jinnie softly chuckles and grabs a bottle of water from the cup holder, "You're beautiful and smart, you shouldn't have any problems getting a cute guy," she says.
"That I agree!" You jokingly say with a sassy eyebrow raise.
When it occurs to you that this would be the perfect opportunity to have another crack at her, you arrange the words in your head before saying them out loud.
"I can say the same thing about you, Jinnie. You're beautiful and smart, except you have a lot of patience in you," you pause for a chuckle and briefly glance at her, "you shouldn't have any problems getting a hot guy."
Jinnie gets quiet and you begin to think that your words offended her in a way yet you give it another moment for her to digest your words thoroughly. She suddenly looks back, probably making sure that none of the boys are listening in on this conversation.
"I'm just a girl," Jinnie meekly says, lowering her voice as she slightly slumps in her seat, "All I can do is wait for the other person to profess their feelings to me."
Oh, finally! You manage to successfully crack her this time. You keep your cool and continue to crack deeper into it.
"I have to stop you right there!" You tell her with your hand raised, making a stop sign at her.
"You're not just a girl, you're incredible!" You may have exaggerated your tone a little bit but she needs to hear the truth in your words.
"You're not just beautiful and smart, you're kind, compassionate and you're strong and gentle at the same time. And if I'm being honest, I look up to you a lot," you openly admit.
"Aww..." Jinnie coos, she seems to be taking your compliments well along with a shy smile.
"And a girl like you shouldn't wait. A girl like you take matters into your own hands and you know, tell him how you feel," you encourage her.
Yeah, okay, maybe there's an underlying motive here but that doesn't make what you said to her a lie.
"It's a different thing when the person you like is your friend and you've been close with that person for so long," Jinnie sighs, her voice drops lower and she seems smaller than ever.
However, the mystery is now solved. Jinnie is indeed having the same feeling, she's hesitant only because they've been friends for too long. You get it that sometimes it's a bit scary to date someone who knows so much about you but if you focus on the good side, it means that they'll be more accepting and understanding towards your qualities.
If there are two people who truly deserve each other, it's Chan and Jinnie.
"Isn't that a good thing? You've known each other long enough to learn so much about each other and understand each other better," you give her your opinion and secretly glance to see her reaction.
Jinnie plays with the lint on her jeans as she digests your words while looking at the ever-changing scenery as the car keeps moving forward.
"You're right," she finally responds to your words.
Now, that you've tried your best to give her that little push, you can only hope for the outcome and hopefully, it'll be the best one.
"I know I'm right," you confidently remark, then burst into laughter.
Unbeknownst to you and Jinnie, Chan has been listening all along and behind his dark hoodie, he's smiling from ear to ear.
-
After stopping for dinner, the trip continues with Chan behind the wheel and Jeongin on his side. Jinnie takes the middle seat with Han and you occupy the backseat, using the extra space to curl up and sleep.
It's a bummer that you're not sitting next to him but this way, Han can easily look to the back and see you peacefully sleeping with a hand under your head, lost in your sweet dream.
"Hey, Han, can you get me a can of soda?" Chan asks without looking at him.
Since he's too busy watching you sleep, Han doesn't hear it the first time and snaps his head to the front, "What?"
"Get me a soda," Chan repeats while holding his arm out to the back so Han can hand it right into his hand.
Han rummages inside the small cooler box next to his feet, grabbing the first can that rolls into his hand and putting it into Chan's hand.
"Thanks!" Chan shortly says to him.
The road is eerily empty as it turns smaller from four into two lanes and the last sliver of sun has fully disappeared, replaced by the soft moonlight on a hot summer night.
Having nothing to do, Jeongin looks into the GPS to assess the route and the final destination.
"It says we'll arrive at 7 in the morning," he says.
"Yep, there's no hurry. We have plenty of time until the gig," Chan calmly says, still holding the soda in his hand, unopened.
Jeongin reclines on his seat and crosses his arms together on his chest, "And what we're going to do until then?"
"I booked us rooms at a hotel nearby," Chan informs, "we'll have some rest before leave in the afternoon."
"Hotel, right? Not motel?" Jeongin asks with suspicious eyes because the last time they stayed at the motel, he had to share the bed with Han.
"Yes," Chan hastily answers.
"I'm going to get my own room," Jeongin says.
"I thought you like sharing the bed with me," Han jokingly says.
"That's the least of my worries," Jeongin says, then gives each of them a glare.
Han pops his head in the middle of them, "Then what's the problem?"
Jeongin gives each of them a glare, "It's you guys snoring. It's like a whole orchestra in there but all the instruments are tuba," he says with a shiver.
Han grabs the front of Jeongin's shirt in response, "My snore sounded nothing like tuba!"
"How do you know what your snores sound like?" Jeongin asks, giving him the side eyes.
"Last time I checked it's Beethoven's Symphony No. 9," Han answers without a beat.
Jeongin leans at him and gives him a perplexed look, "What?"
"What?" Han asks back with daring eyes.
"Beethoven's Symphony No. 9," Chan says, finding himself giggling to it and his giggles gradually turn into laughter that fills the small, enclosed space.
Chan slows down the speed and holds the steering wheel steady with his forearms to open his can of soda. The second it pops open, the carbonated drink fizzles and spills out of the can.
"Oh, no, man..." he groans in complaint, seeing the soda get all over the steering wheel and dripping onto his lap.
"You made a mess, Chris," Jeongin grumbles, pulling multiple tissues out of the box and then handing some to him. He helps to wipe the droplets that somehow land on the console.
With one hand steadily holding the steering wheel, Chan keeps on dabbing the wet patch on the jeans with a ball of tissues.
"Ugh, it's sticky," Chan groans in disgust and then looks down at his lap to see if he misses anything.
The moment Chan's eyes are off the road, the headlights shine on an object that comes into sight, and Jeongin, as the only one aware of the deer standing in the middle of the road, reflexively grabs the steering wheel and turns it hard to the right.
Losing control of the car, no one can do anything to stop it. The tires are screeching against the asphalt as the car spins around, and eventually stops as it hits something with a loud banging sound, but no one is moving.
-
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supernovafics · 9 months
Note
requesting for the ill be there for you universe! the kids are coming over so steve and r plan a lil dinner party… well they make the dinner together… and its just a little too domestic…. bonus if they end up dancing to some silly song on the radio because arent we all a sucker for dancing in the kitchen 😭😭😭😭😭 the kids walk in on them and are like 🤨🤨 those two need to get together now so baddddddddddd
𝐌𝐀𝐘𝐁𝐄 𝐓𝐇𝐈𝐒 𝐘𝐄𝐀𝐑
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"i'll be there for you" universe masterlist
pairing: bestfriend!roommate!steve harrington x fem!reader
word count: 1.6k words
warnings: explicit language
summary: in which a new year’s dinner at the apartment sparks a bet— that you and steve are completely unaware of— among the friend group 
author's note: thank u for the request !! happy new year<33
general note: everything in this universe/series can be read as standalone oneshots but to understand the full “lore” it would prob be best to read the other stuff too<333
.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。. .・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.
Winter 1986
Steve heard the knock on the door first; you were way too engrossed in singing along to the song that was loudly playing to notice the sound. 
He maneuvered around you in the kitchen to go answer the door as you took a quick peek in the oven to check on the lasagnas. 
It was your idea to have this “New Year’s dinner” at the apartment— since you and Steve had been sick during the holidays and couldn’t see anyone, this was to make up for that— and Steve agreed. Of course, Robin and Eddie said that they would come, and then the kids were an immediate yes as well. 
Even though your and Steve’s collective cooking skills were not the best, you both still wanted to attempt and cook something for everyone, instead of simply ordering a couple of pizzas or takeout from some place. So, you got a lasagna recipe from Miss Johnson that she promised was very basic and couldn’t really be messed up; and so far, she’d been right. Although you did initially have to remake the sauce because of a mess up that you fully blamed on Steve and he fully blamed on you. But, after that, everything else luckily went fine. 
When Steve opened the door and you looked over to see everyone bounding into the apartment, it was then that you remembered just how big the friend group was— you could only imagine what that elevator ride up to the apartment had been like. 
“Is this The Breakfast Club soundtrack?” Robin asked, laughing as she slipped off her coat.
“Yes,” Steve answered. “This is what I’ve been subjected to for the past week.”
You immediately rolled your eyes at his words, which you somehow managed to hear over the loud music. “Oh, shut up, you were just singing along to the last song with me.”
“There’s only some truth to that,” He said as he walked over to the record player to turn the music down a bit. 
Everyone settled at the dining table that Steve’s mom bought for you two for the Thanksgiving dinner that you’d been forced to have here with your parents— that was still somehow a memory that lingered harshly in the back of your mind, like most interactions with your parents did. The table was only meant to fit six people, so the desk chairs that normally sat in your bedrooms were pulled out and placed at the table, and then two foldable chairs were borrowed from your other next door neighbor; this guy in his mid-sixties who would have weekly poker nights with his friends. You would continuously joke around with Steve and tell him that he should join in on the poker nights. In response, he’d always simply roll his eyes at you because you knew that he was bad at poker and he’d also rather not spend his Tuesday nights with random old men. 
Mike walked over to you and handed you a tupperware full of what you could tell were gingerbread cookies. “Since you missed the Christmas party, my mom wanted me to give these to you.”
You immediately smiled. “Holy shit, God bless that woman. Please tell her I said thank you.” 
He nodded at that and then went over to the table, sitting down next to El. 
Steve went back over to where you were in the kitchen and started reaching for the tupperware, but you immediately shooed his hand away. When he simply pouted at you, you rolled your eyes and then opened it so that he could grab a cookie, which he did and then broke it in half so that he could give a piece of it to you. 
“Is it just me or have they been acting extra old married couple lately?” Dustin asked, looking away from the interaction that just happened. 
“Oh, yeah, definitely,” Max answered almost immediately and pretty much everyone else simply nodded in agreement.
Neither you nor Steve were paying any attention to the conversation that was currently taking place barely ten feet away from you; instead you both were focused on finishing up the food. You were pulling one of the lasagnas out of the oven and Steve was grabbing the other before putting the store bought garlic bread in the oven— you both had figured that if the lasagna did end up turning out bad, there would at least be bread that neither of you had a hand in making to somewhat save the day. 
“I fully believe that this will be the year that they finally get together,” Lucas said, sounding very certain.
Robin shook her head at that. “No way. If they were gonna date, it would’ve happened already. Years ago, probably.”
She thought back to this past Halloween where you and Steve were dressed up in your Batman and Robin costume, and at some point during the night he ended up giving you a piggyback ride while you all were walking to some party, and she and Vickie were trailing a bit behind the two of you. She thought about how certain she had felt when answering Vickie’s question about if you two had ever dated. “They seem like they’d be perfect together, but I also think the world would implode if they ever tried something.” For the most part, that still felt entirely true. Even though it would’ve made complete sense if something happened, it still didn’t seem necessarily “possible” at this point— it felt like such a far-fetched idea.
“I’m gonna have to agree with Rob on this one. I don’t think they’ll ever actually get together,” Eddie said and then started laughing a bit as he said his next words. “Or it’ll happen twenty years down the road after they’ve both been married to other people and then divorced, and then they’ll finally realize that all they needed and wanted was each other.”
“Wow, that sounds like the most depressing movie ever,” Will told him. 
“I guess it wouldn’t be that sad since they would end up together in the end,” El said with a small shrug.
Eddie nodded. “Exactly.”  
“Okay, yeah, maybe that could happen, but I don’t think it would take that long anymore because things are so different now,” Dustin said. “They’re living together, they have a child together.” He gestured to Harold the Hamster’s cage that sat on the coffee table in the living room. “They’re practically already a couple. It’s inevitable now. Soon they’ll be married and there will be actual children involved, not just Harold.”
Robin rolled her eyes at his final statement. “They’re best friends. They’ve known each for like ten years.” 
“Yeah, which is just another reason why they’re definitely gonna end up together,” Lucas said. “Also, I can’t even remember the last time either of them went on a date, and Steve usually always talks about his dates.” 
“Actually, he was just going out with that girl last month,” Will chimed in. “Vanessa or something?”  
“And that ultimately led nowhere,” Max reminded him. 
Mike took a brief look over at you and Steve to make sure that you two still weren’t listening to the current conversation. “Okay, I have an idea. We should make this a bet. We each say when we think they’ll get together, and if it does end up happening we all give whoever got it right or was the closest five bucks.”
Eddie laughed before nodding. “I actually kind of like that idea.” 
“It’s a great idea,” Dustin said with a nod, and it didn’t necessarily surprise anyone when he pulled out a small notebook and pen out of his pocket because it somehow made sense that he would be the one to bring a notebook and pen to a dinner party; he was probably prepared for anything. 
He started off by saying February– because even though it was only a month away, it was in fact, the month of love— and then everyone started going around the table saying their guesses. Lucas said April, Max and El both said March, Mike said July, Will said August, Robin said a very certain “Never,” and Eddie finished by saying a playful and only slightly serious, “Twenty years.”
It was almost comical how oblivious you and Steve were to what was happening not that far away from you both. Instead, your attention was on grabbing enough silverware for everyone since the plates were already set on the table and Steve was pulling out some cups. 
“I think both of our moms would scold us for not setting everything out before they came,” You told Steve, laughing a bit.
“Very true. I guess our years of being forced to eat at fancy restaurants with them have truly taught us nothing,” He joked back and you smiled at that as you both walked over to the dining table. “We’re gonna bring over the lasagna in a second. What are you guys talking about?” 
“Nothing,” Eddie said casually as Dustin slipped his notebook back into his pocket, which was a subtle action that neither of you noticed. “Just some movie.”
Once everything was set on the table, you two went back to the kitchen to grab the lasagnas.
“The bread will be done in a couple minutes, so if the lasagna sucks we’ll eat that,” You said as you sat down in one of the two empty chairs left, which just so happened to be your desk chair. “Also, if it sucks, blame Steve, not me.”
He shook his head as he rolled his eyes at you and playfully poked your side before taking a seat in the other empty chair on the opposite side of the table. “If it sucks, blame both of us because this was a very mutual effort.”
Robin nodded. “Okay, got it. If this turns out to be the worst meal all of us have ever eaten we’ll make sure to hate both of you equally and not talk to either of you for at least a week.”
Luckily, the lasagna actually turned out pretty great.
.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。. .・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.
let me know ur thoughts<333
(requests are open for stuff you wanna see in the universe/series!🫶🏾)
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galactic-rhea · 4 months
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It's ranting hours sunday for me: Y' know, I think when people complain soooo much about Padmé getting with Anakin, they're failing to see a lot of things. BUT ESPECIALLY...That it was her choice, and if speaks a lot of her character and personality.
She was already done dirty by the movies by getting so many deleted scenes, but then if you try to take away the agency she had on marrying a human disaster or her choices, like her forgiveness/understanding, it's actually undermining and flattening her character.
The fact is that she's actually very similar to Anakin, she's stubborn, deeply traumatized, compromises a lot for the sake of others and loves beyond reasoning. We, the audience, know that Anakin will become Darth Vader and one of the most iconic villains of history; so everything he does can be seem as a red flag that really isn't there.
From Padmé's POV, Anakin has done terrible things, but it's capable of incredible acts of love and compassion. They're in circumstances that aren't normal at all, she was queen at 14, and he was born a slave and joined the space wizard monks and his normal is kill or be killed. Our modern and omniscient POV can't be applied onto them because there's no point of comparison in this sci-fi-shakespearen tragedy-soap-opera-fantasy.
Besides...she was actually right in the end, and I don't believe is "feminist" or progressive to take away a big part of her core personality, that actually had repercussions in the whole story, and make her out to be either unaware and naive of marrying a monster, or (the worst one, imo) being jedi-mind-tricked-brainwashed-abused by her husband.
The "right, correct, girlboss and queen" actitude does more damage than help, leave Padmé to be a person. A person who wanted to have a fairytale romance with some guy who would fight for her and makes her laugh.
Also, the hell why you wanna blame her for something Anakin does, come on. That's a whole other can of worms, though. My point is, that trying to avoid or re-work-or re-contextualize the fact that she chose Anakin despite him literally telling her about murdering a whole village, is actually changing a big chunk of her personality traits.
She was a child queen, then a politician at the edge of an inminent war, manipulated by the same guy that groomed Anakin into a massive murderer, saw her people being taken into camps, had assasination attempts weekly and had to rip off of her individualism by becoming a public figure, giving up her sense of being a person by having several almost identical decoys, she had to stop being just Padmé to be Queen and then Senator Amidala and she did all of that showing little to no emotion.
Then Anakin does all what she herself had to rip off of her in order to be a politician: Honest, passionate, and able to show emotions; like love or anger.
She has morals and she represents democracy and justice, in a way. But I fully believe that inside her she had the same passionate anger and love capable of burning the galaxy that we know Anakin had, which makes them different sides of the same coin, and I think she realized that. Anakin perhaps didn't , as he never stopped of seeing himself as a slave and therefore inferior, whereas he held Padmé very highly, but I think Padmé saw them both as equals. She didn't have a "I can fix him" mentality, she had a "We're the same, we're both lonely, confused, hurting and scared of losing everything. And if he's like me, then I know he can do the right thing for love."
In other words: She was as insane as her husband, she only seems normal because she wasn't put into the monk warrior order and groomed by the devil for over a decade. (And I don't mean insane as, 'she's crazy for loving a murderer' harley quinn style, I just meant it on a daring, hopeless romantic and tenacious way)
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zepskies · 1 month
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What Does "Supporting Writers" Mean? ✍️
Apparently it's Fanfic Writer Appreciation Day! To all my fellow writers, I truly appreciate you for bringing me joy, making me smile on rough days, and giving me my weekly/daily dose of escapism and warm fuzzies. (Shoutouts to you personally below.) 💓💓
But what does it mean "practically" to appreciate your favorite writers, especially on Tumblr?
For example, I know some fanfic authors are starting to block "serial likers": people who'll go through someone's entire masterlist and hit the "like" button on 20-something stories without commenting or basic reblogging.
While I think blocking them is extreme, I understand the authors' frustrations. I've actually been asked if I'll ever leave Tumblr, since many of them have dropped off over the past few months, or even the past few years.
I'm still here for two very important reasons:
I love to write about my favorite characters. I write primarily because I love it, not just for the kudos.
I'm friggin' blessed to have a lot of friends and lovely readers on here and Ao3 who support me immensely on my writing and on this blog in general. I love and appreciate each and every one of you! Which is why I do my best to reply to your comments and reblogs. 💖💖
Of course, there are many reasons why a writer might take a break or stop writing entirely, but one of those reasons is also why the #supportwriters tag exists...
And why you'll see us include banners like this on our posts:
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(Credits: cafekitsune, me, inklore)
That being said, here's my own rule of thumb on how I try to support my fellow writers when I read something I enjoy:
If I "liked" something, it means I had the time to read a story all the way through and I enjoyed it! (Or I'm bookmarking it for later in the day lol)
If I have the time to read it, I have the time to leave a comment on what I liked the most about it.
If I have the time to write out a comment (anywhere from a few seconds to a few minutes), I typically put that comment in a reblog -- maybe even add a gif or two for ✨razzle dazzle.✨ That way I can share it with the rest of my followers, so they can see it and hopefully enjoy it too...
Why? Because Tumblr isn't TikTok or IG. Reblogging is the best way to help a post gain traction on Tumblr. The algorithm doesn't care much about likes.
But on a more human level, supporting writers is just the basic thing of -- if you enjoyed something you read (that a writer shared for free), just let them know what you liked about it.
Remember that there's a person behind the content you enjoy. They might have been working on that story for weeks or months, or even years before they got the courage to post it.
They might really be putting themselves out there, writing about a topic or subject matter that they're not sure people will even like or engage with.
Maybe they're exploring something new, like a character or trope they've never written before.
Maybe they're expressing part of themselves that they haven't even told another living soul.
Maybe they just wanted to write something fun and smutty or angsty or fluffy and want to share the escapism with you.
Whether they've been writing for years or are just starting out, any and all is valid.
For me, as a writer and a reader, supporting my fellow writers often means supporting my friends. And 9 times out of 10, the way we became friends was by leaving feedback on their work and asking them questions, or responding to their awesome feedback on mine.
If you want a little jumpstart on how to leave feedback, whether encouraging or constructive, here's an awesome post about it (not mine).
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Shoutout to some of my favorite writers 💞:
(In no particular order)
@waynes-multiverse @luci-in-trenchcoats @dean-winchester-is-a-warrior @thatonewriter15 @rizlowwritessortof
@waywardxwords @tofics @kaleldobrev @deanbrainrotwritings @deanwritings
@jawritter @deanwinchesterswitch @justagirlinafandomworld @ravengirl94 @waywardxwords
@spnbabe67 @deanwanddamons @ejlovespie @kittenofdoomage @venus-haze
@talltalesandbedtimestories @sam-is-my-safe-word @jacklesbrainworms @artyandink @princessmisery666 (I just starting reading your stories, but I'm continuing with Samnesia soon!) -- and I'm sure many more! 💋
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daretoassume · 3 months
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guide on how to actually love yourself
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self-love is not all about self-care where you put your weekly masks on with your matcha drink. sure, taking care of yourself physically is included, but self-love is something from within. have you forgiven yourself for your past mistakes? have you forgiven others for their mistakes? are you compassionate and kind to yourself, or do you curse at yourself when you do something wrong?
the thing about neglecting yourself is you will most likely prefer to seek other people's validation, attention, and love, consciously or unconsciously. you will find yourself "lonely" because you do not enjoy your own company. you will find yourself hungry 'in the wilderness' as you constantly seek something 'out there' when you have everything you need within you.
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this "sp" of yours is not going to change your life
how many times can you look at yourself in the mirror and say 'i love you?' how do you feel about it? do you feel resistant because inside it just does not feel real? sure, you are manifesting your sp but have you already done your introspective/inner work before you manifest that love from other people? don’t you feel powerless/helpless when you 'successfully' manifested your sp only to find that you just lost your sense of self?
before you manifest any type of relationship, you must remember that the most important relationship is the relationship you have with yourself. how could you ever prioritize being in a relationship when you just neglected the most important thing? it is like sending a message to yourself that "everything around me is important except me."
i know some people just manifest their "sp" just because. they do not even care about the qualities; they will just "fix him" or "invent him." they are focused on that specific person, not the actual qualities that are right for them.
if you want a kind, respectful, ambitious, caring, sweet, romantic, helpful, generous, attractive kind of person, are you willing to work on those qualities first yourself before manifesting?
because if you have those qualities yourself then it would be so effortless for you to attract that kind of person to you. you are in the same vibration; you would meet people of the same vibration as you because you attract what you are.
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how to actually love yourself
these are just some (personal) ways, to focus on but all of these helped me over the years of working towards myself. feel free to ask/dm me about it if you need help or if there are things you might want to add.
𓍯 shadow work
this is the most important thing to do when you are beginning to work on yourself. you have to feel, see, and examine everything that made you who you are today. all the pain, sorrow, guilt, shame, and resentment, you have to write all those down.
as far as i remember, every time i do shadow work, something incredible happens right after because i know to myself i have broken down a certain block that keeps me stagnant because of those weights that have been holding me down for years since i was a child.
and i say this not because you can experience the things happening right after the shadow work, i say this because in order to truly love yourself, you have to accept every shadow you have had.
𓍯 forgive everyone who did you wrong
and i mean everybody, since you were a baby. love yourself enough to make peace. you might not forgive them for them, but for yourself. this also should be included in your shadow work. if you have to put names one by one of everybody who did you wrong and why it made you feel that way, then do so (just do not send them).
𓍯 change your old beliefs that don't serve you at all
those negative beliefs are not yours to begin with, even if they are directed to you. do not steal those beliefs from others; let them be theirs. but accept that you have them. only then can you let them all go. identify those beliefs that are not serving you, let them go, then create new beliefs that will serve you better.
𓍯 take care of yourself physically
whether that be working out, eating healthy, or taking your vitamins, have a good sleeping schedule. you should always, always, always have time to take care of yourself. you literally live in your body until the end of time. choose to take care of it; be responsible for your own body.
𓍯 you are what you eat
and i am not just talking about what you eat, but also the content on social media, movies, songs, lyrics, and negative beliefs from other people that you are ingesting. if you have been consuming those negative things for years, what did it do to you? does listening to depressing songs make you feel good? it feels at home? why? because you are familiar with it already for years. the bad feels so good, it feels like home to you.
you wake up and immediately doomscroll, and see nothing but what? negative beliefs and opinions of other people?
why do you hate yourself?
unless of course you curated your feed into more positive/helpful content.
𓍯 clean your room
yes, that saying "your room is a reflection of your mind" is real. speaking from my own experience.
𓍯 self-reflect
how many times do you actually reflect on how you act towards others, yourself, and your ambitions in life? reflect on why you do what you do. reflect on the origin of your beliefs and if they are nonsensical, let them go. self-reflection keeps you grounded and gives you self-awareness, hence, you take more right actions in your daily life.
𓍯 have some self-respect and know your worth
you are not here to accept the disrespect of others and just think that you deserve it or continue to have connections with them. you should be on the pedestal, not him, not her, not that object, but you. do not accept something below your expectations. and do not even get to the point that you are about to lose your self-respect; flee that situation as soon as possible and never look back.
you are not here to plead, to apologize, or to wait for somebody who does not think about you at all.
how can you be okay with people disrespecting you and not you disrespecting yourself?
you have no idea how much power you have. think highly of yourself. nobody is going to do this for you. and even if they know your worth and you don't, you will just keep thinking lowly of yourself, speaking badly of yourself because you think you do not deserve to be worthy.
how can you be okay with that?
𓍯 follow your highest excitement
no matter how other people think how silly it is (physical reality is just a messenger of who you are),
if you know inside that you are meant for it, if you know that it is your highest excitement, do it and just continue to go for it, every day. and i am not suggesting playing video games all day and forget about your health and your loved ones. choose to do what you are passionate about. what are the things that you see yourself doing in a few years?
𓍯 educate yourself
read books, learn a hobby, learn something you are passionate about, learn how to socialize professionally. we all have these different kinds of sources that we can easily access. the thing is some people would rather spend their time on nonsensical things and doomscroll until they feel bad and sorry for themselves. be hungry for knowledge.
"do you know that most people that i meet spend their lives looking for occasions to be offended? they actually are out there hoping that they can find some reason to be offended, and there's no shortage of reasons, they're out there everywhere." ♰ dr. wayne dyer
𓍯 be disciplined
every single day, you have to make a choice to change for yourself, in a way that you prefer, of course.
it is easy to be successful these days, you just have to be willing to make a commitment. we can take all this knowledge, but the only way to have results is to take action and be disciplined to do them.
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do you love yourself enough to change?
do you love yourself enough to make a difference in your reality? sure, there are beliefs that have been programmed into you since you were a baby, but it is always your responsibility to heal and change those beliefs. most likely, those people you surrounded yourself with since you were a baby did not know anything about loving themselves.
how can they teach something they do not know at all?
but we can never blame them or point fingers and say, 'you did this to me.' no. because we are all just victims of victims, until you decide to make a change for yourself.
"remember, you have been criticizing yourself for years and it hasn’t worked. try approving of yourself and see what happens." ♰ you can heal your life, louise hay
it is always your choice, it is your life anyway.
i always say that it is easier to match the vibration of what you want (or manifest, whatever you call it) if you love yourself and have a strong self-concept.
because first of all, you have your attention and energy all to yourself, thus, you attract all the things you want in the vibration you are in. second, you would not even think of your desires, you just know (inside) that you have them, and it is only a matter of time for the 3d to catch up.
in this way, there is no resistance at all.
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how i worked on myself
speaking from the experience i have through the years, these are everything (that i remember) i did that worked on loving myself. it is not linear like healing, especially from the first few years of working on myself, but i can say this year it is easier to navigate. i still continue to educate myself, but i wanted to share my knowledge from the self-help and loa books i read and also lectures, seminars, and audiobooks i listened to. it gets easier over time, and i see life in a better and beautiful way.
i did it, what makes you different? all you have to do is make a choice for yourself.
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catnipaddictt · 4 months
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Clay surviving and finding the love of his life?
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clay beresford x reader
wc: 1k
cw: fluff, kissing, spoliers for Awake (2007)
comment: I love love love Clay, so thank you anon <3
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Clay was absolutely smitten. After his ordeal during his heart surgery a lot had changed for him. One of those being you. He never thought that he would be capable of love again. Sam’s betrayal made him doubt himself everyday and showed him the lengths people would go to in order to have access to his fortune.
He met you sometime after his surgery, but was still apprehensive about letting you into his life. Slowly but surely, over time he began to open up to you. He told you about his childhood, his mother, and eventually what happened during his heart transplant. 
You were patient with him, something he valued in you. You let him speak and always listened so intently to what he had to say. 
When he realized he was developing feelings towards you he was conflicted and confused. He truly thought he wouldn't be able to produce these kinds of emotions again. Clay wanted to trust you, he knew he could, but he couldn't shake the memory of Sam and the plot against him.
It took time for him to figure out what he was going to do about his attraction towards you. He wanted you but at the same time his brain told him it was a bad idea. That getting caught up in romance would lead to heartbreak and more devastation.
You however fell head over heels for Clay. He was passionate and spoke in a way that made you feel as if he was taking in every breath you took. You didn't want to scare him off so you pushed those feelings down to the deepest pit of your very being. You couldn't bear to ruin your friendship with the blonde.
After weeks of debate with himself, Clay came to his decision. During one of your weekly sit downs at a cozy corner cafe, he took your hand in his. 
Looking across at him, you felt the warmth of his skin against your palm. You prayed he didn't notice the heat rising on your cheeks or the shaking of your hands. His soft blue eyes looked into yours as his thumb gently ran across the back of your hand.
As he spoke, he looked softly at you, eyes never leaving yours. He told you about how he had come to see you more than just a friend, but that he was confused with himself. Although you would never be able to understand the extent to which he was affected by Sam, you knew that this was hard for him.
After he had admitted his feelings towards you, you were left slightly stunned. Clay Beresford really liked you? You felt like a schoolgirl who just found out that their crush liked them. Breaking the pause in conversation, you let out a grin so big Clay thought he could have another heart attack from the slight. 
He was surprised as you told him you felt the same about him. He couldn't believe that sweet little you thought of him the same way he did you. 
You both took things slow in the beginning. You knew that Clay still suffered with internal doubt about your relationship, so you made it your mission to show him how much you truly cared about him.
As time went on, he realized that this was real, and that you weren't faking your feelings to get his credit card number. Once he came to this conclusion he felt more like himself than he had in a long time.
Holding hands while on a walk turned into peaks on the lips and eventually, you staying the night at his luxurious home. It felt so right for the both of you. 
You fell into a steady rhythm with each other. The pair of you were obsessed with each other, seeing the other was the highlight of your day. Clay was thankful for your understanding when it came to his past. And you were delighted to try and help him through this. 
Many months went by, and it was safe to say that you both were well and truly in love with each other. The first time you said those three words to each other was a calm Saturday afternoon. The sun shine illuminated Clay as you strolled through the public gardens. The autumn leaves fell around the two of you as you walked hand in hand across the grass. 
The leaves that littered the ground were still damp with that morning's dew causing you to tread carefully. Unluckily for you, you stepped down without looking into a particular slippery leaf. Before you know it you were sliding onto the ground, directly into a pile of leaves probably left by some children. Clay's hand was lost from yours as you landed in the pile, causing a laugh from him.
Before you knew it you were both laughing at your clumsiness and he was reaching out his hand to help you back up. Seeing your chance you took his hand only to pull him down into the leaves with you. As he toppled towards you he let out a noise of surprise before landing beside you. 
You laughed as he turned over, lying in the leaves on his back. You followed suit, lying down next to him as the sun hit you through the barren branches of the trees above. 
You sense his head turn to face you, his eyes looking into you. Turning your body to face him you smile at his now messy hair, leaves stuck in it. You pluck out a few golden ones, moving his hair around softly 
“I love you” he says abruptly, your eyes locking on each other. You break out into a smile which fills Clay with butterflies. “I love you too Clay.”
His eyes shine at your words as he pulls you closer to him, leaves sticking to the both of you. He places a sweet kiss on your lips, which you return swiftly. Pulling away you laugh at all the leaves still stuck in his locks. 
“You look nice like this” you say to which he lets out a laugh that is so very him. “You always look nice sweetheart, even if you are covered in leaves” he replies smoothly before sitting up and getting to his feet. This time you let him pull you to your feet before your hand is in his again.
You felt like the luckiest person alive and you could bet that Clay felt the same.
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Let me know if there are any errors or if you want to be added to the taglist!
Taglist: @heartsforanakin @qvnthesia @ysrjune
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infiniteetcetera · 4 months
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My next weekly controversial ACOTAR post: A defense of Azriel, because if I see one more post saying he has no personality or is an incel (but also an f-boy apparently) then it’s game over
Azriel is such an interesting and complex character I think it’s an incredible shame so many readers misinterpret him just because his character is shown is small bursts rather than loud blasts. SO i’m not going to try and defend him because this man has done nothing wrong, instead I’ll provide y’all with a list of moments that prove both that Azriel DOES have a personality and that’s it’s a loveable one:
•He tells Feyre that Cassian is annoying right up front (a small thing but I appreciate it)
• He spent the night at Rita’s with Feyre, playing silly games betting on Rhys’ dating life (funny for so many reasons) and making her feel comfortable in an overwhelming situation
•Even though he’s quiet and private, he confides to Feyre he doesn’t know where he belongs after 500 years and feels he doesn’t fit in to reassure her that the feelings she’s having are normal
•He was reassuring and polite to Elain and Nesta when they first meet
•Acknowledged that it was a risk and a sacrifice for Nesta and Elain to lend them their house and was thankful rather than antagonistic or rude (*cough cough Cassian*) and met them both with a protective regard to Feyre but an open mind about their circumstances
•Is so upset by the mysogny and abuse in Illyria he straight up refuses to go there because he will not play nice and polite with these jerks like Rhys and Cas do
•In Feyre’s own words, she trusts him well enough that if Rhys was ever doing something to harm her/locking her up like Tamlin did she believes he would not only save her but deal with Rhys himself if it came to it
•Follow up on above, he spies on Amren against Rhys’ orders. When Feyre asks about it Amren says Azriel is the most disobedient of the IC (some of them could never) because he’s willing to do what is right over what Rhys thinks is right (hot)
•Gave Feyre such a stunning smile after she accepts the mating bond that Rhys is filled with jealousy and ready to attack (that is to say, this man is very pretty and deserves credit for it)
•Amren putting her head on his shoulder after battle because she’s tired and everyone (including him) is shocked but he’s polite about it and also it just radiates male worth trusting vibes
•Was literally bleeding out screaming crying throwing up poisoned and still sassed the king of Hybern for Mor and Feyre
•When Cassian is trying to make Lucien uncomfortable Azriel KICKS HIM (all the Azriel is so mean/hates Lucien people come down to reality please)
•When Cassian implies something rude about Nesta and Mor wants to join in Azriel shoots her a look to stop (yes the Az that is supposedly obsessed with Mor and her opinion of him) and Feyre describes said look as as if they had talked about it many times before so YES EVEN PRE-ACOWAR THIS MAN WAS SUPPORTING NESTA
•Feyre and Mor both agree he’s the only one with manners
•He laughed at Nesta’s sassy comment to Mor because man respects good comedy
•When Cassian makes a sexist joke and implies Az is thinking the same thing not only does Azriel not engage with his tomfoolery but Mor cuts in to defend him as the only batboy who never says such things
•Just the ENTIRE sequence of him training Feyre to fly. He’s so sweet and witty and charming
•So gentle and reassuring to Elain, offering to show her the garden and carrying her all the way up to the house
•Him taking care of Feyres injuries from the flying lessons. Again just always being so gentle and sweet. He trusts her enough not to go easy on her but isn’t cruel and overworking either
•The entire Nephelle story and just the fact Rhys gave the story to Azriel as a “gift” this boy appreciates sweet stories about underdog lesbians with wings and I love it
•Just him paying such close careful attention to Elain and recognizing she is a seer, him talking her through her visions and helping reassure her she’s not crazy (he knows what that feels like)
•Even though he hates Illyrians, he helps Cassian break the news to the families of those who lost warriors in the war
•Just “I don’t see you spouting poetry brother” “I don’t need to resort to it😩🔥”
•BE CAREFUL HOW YOU SPEAK ABOUT MY HIGH LADY
•Eris uttered the word “slut” about a woman and this man ATTACKED. Like I am an Eris stan and I know some people don’t like this scene but it’s the true feminist energy I need
•Ignoring Rhys’ order to stand down but stopping the second Feyre says something bc this man respects women’s authority (t’s literally an intentional way of demonstrating Feyres power right after she was belittled by Tamlin. people act like he was rabid in this scene but it seems so clear to me he was intentionally doing this to support his high lady)
•Was the first to realize something was wrong with Elain (also has a sweet exchange of looks with Nesta over it, like they are homegirl’s designated protectors)
•Just EVERYTHING about him volunteering to get Elain back. Whether you ship Elriel or not this was such a sweet moment. He doesn’t hesitate at all even when Nesta says it’s a death wish and everyone’s sentiment starts to change.
•Everything about him saving Elain and the human girl. Just 10/10 all around, hot, stunning, sweet, incredible, precious angel of death boy
•Az is so badly wounded after the rescue mission that Rhys and the others who see him are shocked but he refused to set Elain down (even though she’s not hurt) until Rhys takes her and the first thing he asks is for Helion to come unchain her (not anything for himself). Again just SOOO sweet and caring whether you ship Elriel or not
•Another Elriel moment but well they happen, Az giving her truth teller is just🤧 he’s never lent out this blade to his brothers or anyone else, we know it has some special brand of magic and he likely does too and he offers it to Elain to give her a sense of safety (again even if you don’t ship them it’s just so considerate)
•”Chain me to a tree Rhys, I’ll rip it out of the ground and fly with it on my damned back” LIKE TELL ME THAT ISNT HOT
•A super small moment but after the war when the boys are watching the sisters/Mor laughing and Rhys starts crying Az tells him “it’s real” and I just think the intuitive understanding and care behind that is so sweet (especially when Az is so misunderstood by his brothers)
•This sounds more like a hate comment to Rhys/Cassian than pro Az but when Rhys admits he and Cassian used to beat Azriel for hours to get him to speak to them and he never would, I think that’s such crazy determination and resolve and also he’s wayyyyy nicer than me for still putting up with them after that
•HIM REFUSING TO SPY ON LUCIEN. I just love that degree of respect it’s made even better by the fact Rhys asks about Lucien a second time bc he literally assumes Az was joking and Azriel’s just like “nope not doing it” (again people who say he hates Lucien, please)
•Him finding drunk Cassian and Feyre and trying to fix their terrible decorations the just chugging some wine himself😭 he’s so funny AND sweet
•”Sit, I’ll take care of it.” I NEED THIS ENERGY FROM EVERY MAN EVER PLEASE
•Also him telling everyone to wait for Elain because she’s literally the one who cooked and them eating before her would be rude and I just IWJDKWKDN again so hot and polite and it’s not even a romance/flirting thing bc when Elain comes back and she/Cas give him the opportunity to take credit he doesn’t at all?? He just did it because it’s right and proper
•Him insulting Amren to defend Elain (and then blushing when everyone laughs at his joke) he’s precious (and funny af)
•Him dying at Elains gift JMEKXNEKD the IC stresses him fr and he’s waiting for someone to free him
•Him being nice about Mor’s awful gifts even though she’s known him for 500 years and still gets him awful gifts and also exchanges lingerie with Cassian to his (and Nesta’s) face even though she thinks Az is in love with her
•Half compliment to Az half complaint about Cassian, but when there’s mention of all the universe research Rhys does in ACOSF Cassians like “Rhys told him and he instantly forgot” but As is super interested and listens intently and wants to learn more and I just love a boy with hobbies and interests😩
•Small thing but when he first sees Nes in the house of wind in ACOSF he smiles and is so polite and Nesta tells us for like a whole paragraph how beautiful he is and I trust that woman above all
•Also in reference to the above, Nesta chats with Az for like 10 seconds and instantly wants to train with him over Cas because she knows he’d be better to her
•Azriel blushing when Nesta calls him pretty✨ (such a sweet lover boy I swear)
•He laughs at Nesta’s insults to Cassian but holds back from laughing at Cassians✨
•The only one who literally JUST ASKS why Nesta won’t train and also sparks the idea in Cassians obtuse head that it might be because she doesn’t want to train in Illyria (VALID)
•I know people have mixed takes about how the scene is written but him asking Nesta if she was pushed down the stairs feels genuine to me, like he asks the question very pointedly serious and focuses just on Nesta, his vague amusement after is only in regard to Cassians dumb reaction but the fact he asked her and the way in which he does it (ignoring Cassians input and still waiting for Nesta’s answer) shows genuine consideration to her (still a stranger to him for all intents and purposes) over his brother’s feelings
•Him paying such careful attention to Nesta and being the only one who never starts fights with her to such a strong degree that even Nesta feels too seen by him
•Such a basic thing (but it’s not when you look at the quality of other ACOTAR men unfortunately) but when Cassian asks him if he wants kids he says it’s not his decision (like this is why I hate the anti-elriel “elain can’t bare his children” argument, I assure you Az does not gaf)
•”Azriel had never said a bad word about Nesta” and i’m not supposed to stan???
•Also the fact he doesn’t like hand to hand combat bc he doesn’t like getting covered in people’s sweat JEKKDKW I know it’s just a gag Cas jokes about but there’s something so funny and refined about that
•Him being so competitive is hot honestly😩 especially how Cassian describes it as not being in an arrogant or scary way but in a very strategic sort of manner, how he’s often the only one who can compete with Rhys (who was trained for this stuff since birth) like YES
•Az getting flustered and awkwardly walking away when he sees how Nesta is staring at him and Cas KEKKDKE i so highly appreciate his balance between confident and shy boy
•Him and Nesta smiling about Cassians stupidity, being “allies against his insanity,” again, Az just being a friend to her is so sweet (and important given it’s like the one thing Nesta needed in this book)
•Not only does he vote with Cas against keeping things from Nes but when Amren starts saying lewd things about her it’s Azriel (not Cassian bc apparently he could never) who tells her to STFU about Nesta
•Amren tells the boys NOT to touch the sword and Az is legit the only one who tries to listen (the ONLY bat boy with brain cells half the time)
•Just the fact that once he starts training the Priestesses with Cas Nesta notes a bunch of them seem to have crushes on him. Like these girls who have been so traumatized by men they can barely stand to be in public feel that comfortable with him so quickly, he just radiates safe energy
•Also a small moment but him awkwardly smiling the first time he sees Gwyn at training and just trying to act casual to not make her feel weird is so sweet.
•Him dancing with Nesta “as easily as breathing” (again, their friendship means everything to me)
•When Nesta asks him why he came to solstice if seeing Elain/Lucien hurts him and he says “Because Rhys wants me here and it’d hurt him if I didn’t come” like HEJEKNDO he’s so selfless for the people he cares about FR (especially given how Rhys talks to him that same night)
•EVERYTHING about his gift to Nesta. The fact he didn’t have to give her one in the first place (it was no one’s expectation, including hers. on the surface he didn’t even get Elain a gift so it wasn’t just a polite thing). The way the gift is literally SO SWEET AND GENUINELY THOUGHTFUL like he took care not just to get her something but to get her something that would bring her joy and be useful (and is definitely based on his observations about her avoiding the fireplace)
•ALSO when she hugs him the entire room goes silent because they’re just that shocked but he just laughs and hugs her gently and then is blushing after like ANDKEKD
•The entire relationship he forms with Gwyn and how he notes shes competitive and uses that to help inspire her in training and even when he’s teasing her he’s so potently rooting for her too
•Him being nervous about holding baby Nyx with his scarred hands like this precious angel IEKKDKW
Most Offending Thing, His Bonus Chapter (the good and the bad)
•Him scheming about a snowball fight for a whole year is hilarious
•Also him including in his plotting that Cassian would be up all night with Nesta (little did he know his boy only lasts like one round, that and Cassian being so horrified at the thought of Az finding out about him being quick off the mark with Nesta, I just know Az is the stamina king)
•Even his shadows just want him to sleep but your boy is too depressed
•I’m sorry but everything about his and Elains almost kiss is HOT people who think it was overly sexualized or something have missed all the first thoughts we get from like every SJM boy about their LI (ROWAN IN QOS FR) and also the fact that this tension has obviously been brewing for a while??? he’s been avoiding her because it’s that palpable and ELAIN KNOWS IT. it’s a mutual thing it doesnt mean there isn’t romance beneath it or that he’s a creep for wanting her after a year of putting off his feelings
Brief interlude, his offending lines:
•”My two brothers are with two of those sisters but the third was given to another” - the language here might make you uncomfortable but that’s because MATING BONDS ARE UNCOMFORTABLE. we’re told by Rhys himself that they’re often used to “give” a female to a male. the distinction he makes here that Feyre/Nes are “with” Rhys/Cas but Elain was “given” to Lucien is because Elucien is the only mating bond example we’ve followed in this series where the foundation is not love and choice. Azriel does not feel entitled/think he deserves Elain. In this same chapter he feels unworthy to even touch her, stands outside in the freezing cold until he’s “again nothing at all.” Mor tells us all the way back in ACOMAF that he feels completely undeserving of love. Azriel does not think he deserves Elain just because Rhys said so (Az LITERALLY glares at him for saying it). Azriel brought up a valid point (that other characters have too) that the Archeron sisters (who have comparable power) would makes sense all mated to the bat boys (again, comparable power) since we know that’s a crux of mating bonds. Not to mention, Azriel and Elain genuinely just like each other and always have, more so than any of the mated couples even. From a logical standpoint, they would make sense as mates. Even this ships haters say they would be “too predictable/obvious” like SO YOU AGREE THEY MAKE EASY LOGICAL SENSE that’s what Az is implying.
•”Lucien will never be good enough for her” I’ve seen a lot of people use this line to say Az hates/drags Lucien but that’s not how I interpret it at all. First off, all of Az’s other actions (i’ve listed some above) show he’s actually very considerate of/trusting in regards to Lucien. This line to me reads less as “lucien is a bad/undeserving person” and more “Lucien is not what Elain wants” (right after he says she has no interest in him). From Azriel’s POV (and ours my fellow readers) Lucien has done nothing to win over Elain. Yes he’s been polite and I applaud him for that over others actions with their mates (cough cough Cassian) but he’s also never sought her out for a real conversation about the bond, never had any sort of “clicking” moment with her, and still after years just makes her uncomfortable (as far as we and Az know). I think it makes perfect sense to infer from this Lucien is not “good enough” in regards to what Elain is seeking (I think the easiest way I can put this is the idea of “somebody can be perfect but still not perfect for you”). Is Azriel’s opinion a little biased? Yes FS, but also this girl was about to let him do filthy things to her down the hall from Lucien, I say it’s pretty safe for him to infer that she doesn’t want Lucien (and therefor never will).
•”He hadn’t gotten that far with his planning, certainly not beyond the fantasies he pleasured himself to” - I won’t repeat what I said above regarding the sexual undertones in the chapter, but also the reason why Az hadn’t thought beyond this is in the chapter and it’s not because he’s some fuck boy. AZRIEL KNOWS HE CANT HAVE A FUTURE WITH ELAIN AND DOESNT THINK HE DESERVES IT. It’s written all over their interactions together. He wanted to kiss her to have a piece of her to hold onto, not because he thinks he can have a future with her because he knows as things stand he can’t. He doesn’t want to plan to push her/seduce her (like rhys implies) or anything because he doesn’t feel worthy of her and knows circumstances won’t allow them to be together safely. What’s driving him crazy and keeping him up at night with fantasies is that they do both want each other, but imagining a life where they could have more than that and be happy together is impossible for Az because he’s someone who has never prioritized his happiness and does not expect it.
•”I’ll defeat him with little effort.” - Again reading comprehension I beg, this is not a diss against Lucien. If Lucien was the type of guy to invoke a blood duel because Elain chose Azriel (Lucien wouldn’t, Azriel doesn’t even think he would it’s Rhys who suggests it) then YEAH AZ CAN KICK HIS ASS WITH LITTLE EFFORT BC THAT WOULD BE A CRAPPY THING TO DO.
Back to our regularly scheduled programming
•I LOVE everything about his scene with Gwyn on the roof. His vague awkwardness, his teasing of her and trying to be polite, him actually trying to help her train (after we learn Cas has been useless, go figure), and just being so sweet and kind to her in general even though he’s probably still incredibly sad/upset🤧
•This precious boy gets a small urge to cross his arms and is thrown into a PTSD flashback of his father with his mom??? He constantly consciously makes effort not to appear scary/threatening to women because he’s that scarred from his fathers behavior😭
•Listen, I won’t try to entirely defend the necklace thing because I do think it’s weird no matter who you ship Azriel with BUT i will say my best take on it is that it’s a version of self harm/sabotage. Like the only thing that makes sense to me here is he’s subconsciously creating barriers in his relationships with both Elain/Gwyn by doing this which is honestly way less f-boy (a weird take i’ve seen from people, especially given at this point he has no plans to pursue either Elain or Gwyn) and just way more very sad.
FINALLY, sprinkles from HOFAS:
•He’s so FINE in this book
•His silly little things like kicking rocks while trailing Nesta and Bryce to make a point are SO funny
•Him and Nesta working so well together, may not be a point in his favor but it makes me happy
•Azriel loving and defending his mom✨
•Azriel barely snapping at Nesta and then immediately apologizing and saying he loves her. THAT is more emotional intelligence than any other male in ACOTAR has shown
•Him liking club music but also being embarrassed about it? Adorable
•Everything about his interactions with Bryce in this book strike me so hard because you can tell he’s trying to keep his guard up but still has a lot of sympathy for her. I think that gets to the core of who Az is: smart and distant and guarded but also genuinely kind above all
•Also so many small funny little jokes and lines
I COULD PROBABLY SAY MORE AND GO ON FOREVER BUT HOPEFULLY PEOPLE GET THE POINT :)
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