#i should have a chronic illness tag

[caterjunes]

and like. i've been unemployed for six fucking months now, and actively applying for jobs for four of them. and i just. cannot. make. any. headway. like occasionally i'll get an interview and it'll seem to go really well, and they'll ghost me. or it'll go well until they mention that the call center job Absolutely Has to be done in person, and is that okay? putting me in the position where i don't have an option not to disclose that i'm disabled & would need accommodation to work remotely. and they say they'll look into it and then ghost me. or i'll apply and the next day get a form email that i might want to review the qualifications more closely, or the position was just filled with a more qualified candidate, or or or.

and the majority of the time i can pretend i'm playing a little game with the unemployment office where all i have to do each turn (week) is apply for three jobs. i don't have to get the job, i don't even have to get an interview, i just need to apply for it, and i get a check by my name and a check in the mail. but i'm scraping the bottom of the barrel of jobs i know how to find easily.

and i had been planning to spend my non-working time painting the walls & doing handy projects & using my dedicated tool space. but i am so, so fatigued, all the time. that it often doesn't feel SAFE for me to use power tools. or i know that if i do, i'll spend the next day paying for it in a major way.

[arcaneyouth]

you know what i am gonna make my own post about it. ghost trick spoilers under the cut

in a very non judgemental way, this post was prompted by people who read yomiel as queer for the same things that made me see him as a lot like myself in a chronic/terminal illness way. the queer readings are extremely valid, i just wanna point at how much this connects to people like me in a very blatant way, and yet not a way i have (personally) seen talked about much

it is so dehumanizing to be chronically/terminally ill. (for the purposes of this post, i am going to use these terms interchangeably because i am a person who is chronically ill with an illness that could have killed me easily so they are, for me, quite the same). it is so awful and horrible to feel like you are doomed to this fate of being a ghost when you think you're supposed to be alive but no one will look at you that way because to them you are already dead. and yomiel captures that fucking excellently.

forced to ""live"" for 10 years but never being alive the entire time. all he fucking wanted was to live until it was time to die properly. he wanted people to accept that he's like this and love him anyways. he wanted to Exist but the way he's existing isn't right, so he's been forced to be alone for 10 years stuck in this fucking limbo of life and death.

and as a chronically ill person that really. really fucking resonates. maybe it would have been ok if he had just been allowed to exist as he is. been allowed to be dead. if he hadn't become so isolated by the giant shadow that is his own death. being ill is isolating. the fact that he's puppeting around a body that doesn't feel like it's really his anymore.... what terminal illness does to a motherfucker fr fr.

and god. the moment with lynne, where she is the first person to understand what he's feeling. how everything about his death feels like it dragged him down into an endless void, and she Gets It and that alone makes him really start to want to change.... fuck dude. it's not pity, it's not denial, it's someone finally reaching out a hand and understanding what it means to be like This. to be nothing but a ghost to everyone. and that's what makes him feel like a person again.

makes me insane. anyways happy disability pride month

[spnstillstudies]

do worry i may be experiencing the early (EARLY) stages of artistic burnout and trying to put the fires out in my brain before they spread 🧯🔥

[wingsofhcpe]

hey mutuals, i put this up on insta too (@/cinnammontea check it out *kicked*) but, I decided once my exams are over I'll open writing & drawing commissions to save up money for Erasmus. Would anyone here be interested in either of the two? So I can organise my "promo" post a bit/gauge what the demand will be.

Examples of my art on Instagram (@/cinnammontea without the /)

Examples of my writing:

Feel free to rb/share ♡

[divinesouldariax]

it doesnt have to hurt more to be love!

it doesnt have to hurt more to be love.

there’s been a lot of very good meta about ashton, taking hits, carrying his friends, carrying heavy things for their friends, doing things that hurt, that make it hurt worse, to protect his friends from pain. because he knows how to carry pain. because they’re used to it. because they know he can keep going. because, because, because it’s what he knows, it’s all he knows.

and it’s true. ashton loves them. ashton is willing to hurt more for them, and it’s because they love their friends.

but, but, but. he shouldnt have to. people with chronic pain shouldnt have to do things that make the pain worse. we might choose to, and that is definitely an act of love, but feeling like they dont have a choice, that taking on more pain, silently, suffering without ever asking for help or saying no, i can’t do that, it hurts too much...

because, listen. for most people, chronic pain is limiting. it says no, we’re not climbing those stairs today. no, we can’t lean down and pick something up off the floor. no, we’re staying in bed with a heating pad and telling our friends sorry, i can’t make it today after all. i know you were looking forward to hanging out, but i can’t do it. maybe there’s some people with chronic pain that never have days bad enough that it limits them, but i’ve never met one.

so when i see ashton, whose friends didn’t figure out that he has chronic pain until they literally felt it in his mind, keep their pain under wraps for over a month, never saying no to carrying something (a heavy statue, fcg up a ladder, orym after he fell, laudna’s dead body for miles), swinging his hammer to defend and protect, literally picking losing battles to see if anybody is watching...to me, that doesn’t read as “look at this strong, empowered person with chronic pain who never lets it limit them”.

to me, that says “this is a person who thinks that love cannot exist without a worsening of pain, who won’t let themself pause or say no or even tell anybody that it hurts because he is deeply, deeply afraid that refusing pain is the same thing as denying his friends love”.

and that’s fucking devastating.

it doesnt have to hurt more to be love.

[crimeronan]

i got a good grade in PT today AND i'm cleared to walk as far as i want as long as i do it on mostly-level ground :D

[iliveinprocrasti-nationn]

one thing abt being disabled/chronically ill that some people don’t get is that sometimes body maintenance that ensures you have the absolute minimum amount of function can also be something that takes away a lot of control and autonomy. you can argue till the cows come home that making those decisions to try and help yourself (or realistically to try to make sure things aren’t worse than they already are) is something that exhibits control and autonomy and stuff, but they can be so limiting in practice because they’re things that take up so much time but have to be done to do anything else

[cuteniarose]

I'm bored and can't sleep because of cramps so I decided to mess around with an incorrect quotes generator using the latest OCs @katkastrofa and I created that I unfortunately cannot talk about in detail here because I'd get nerfed in an instant:

[frogsdocrimes]

shoutout to disabled and chronically people with symptoms that are seen as "gross" by the wider world. shoutout to people with digestive issues and illnesses. to people with problems with their stomachs or intestines or bladders or anything else. to people who struggle with vomiting, diarrhea, constipation, or anything else. to people who use diapers. to people with ostomy bags. to people who use the bathroom in other atypical ways. to people who have to collect stool samples for tests/labs. to people on rectally administrated medication. shoutout to people on liquid diets or other specific medical diets, to those with feeding tubes, to anyone with different needs regarding nutrition and hydration. shoutout to those who only sees their condition represented as something weird or gross, as something only talked about as the punchline of a joke.

shoutout to anyone who is afraid to talk about their lives, symptoms, or treatment to those around them for fear of being labeled "gross" or "weird" or "disgusting".

there is nothing wrong with you and you are just as worthy of existing and sharing your experiences as anyone else.

[redacted-metallum]

The singular true crime podcast i listen to had an interview w a criminal psychologist and. My guy was talking about horror movies and snuff films like they were the Same and talking about having violent thoughts like it was a 100% predisposition towards enacting violence and it's like.

Yes my first mistake is listening to a true crime podcast but goddamn cops and those with cop mentality are literally trained to see threats everywhere huh?

Like the first half of the interview was interesting and good info (what qualifies someone for a not guilty by reason of insanity plea) but then the licensed psychologist said that personality disorders were an unfixable fault and didnt count as a "legitimate mental illness". He literally used the word broken

Girlie the perpetrator in this case was on methamphetamine and idolized Jeffery Fucking Dahmer. Lead with THAT

[caterjunes]

basement flooded last night (again! i rly feel like the prev owners fully lied about how often this happens) so i got to spend the Whole day dealing with that

chest & throat hurt, had a couple coughing bouts this evening. i took a Good covid test the other day bc my throat was sore & it came back negative but. i'm worried.

still tired from PT, have not really given myself/had an opportunity to properly rest (i was planning on it today but then basement flood!)

the rest of our house is a mess again

i saw a video of an ancient hairless ferret and it reminded me so much of peach bellini that i sobbed for ten minutes straight

[corvidfeathers]

angry angry angry about having a life that means I have to regularly work while experiencing symptoms that would take able-bodied people out

[autisticlee]

having some sort of chronic pain and tiredness issue and joint problems and whatnot but not knowing exactly what the problem is is really good at leading you feeling like you're faking it or making a big deal out of nothing or making it up. especially if there's a good day where it's not as bad and you can walk straight without limping for the first time in a year. but then you can wake up the next day and can barely walk and wonder why you can't just walk normal. it's hard to not guilt trip yourself into dealing with pain by trying to ignore it and force yourself to walk "normal" all the time

[dogbunni]

My Dr has me wearing a 24hr blood pressure monitor and holy shit. the readings I've been getting. my high readings at the drs office were not white coat anxiety 👀

[tejoxys]

problem: I badly want the delicious blanched spinach recipe, and the beautiful spinach I bought will go bad if I don't cook it, but I don't have the energy for the full blanching process - simmer a pot of water, make the ice bath, add ice cubes as needed to keep it cold, wash the spinach, hold a bunch at a time in the pot with tongs, transfer to the ice bath, squeeze it out, repeat until all bunches are gone, inevitably get spinach water everywhere to mop up, clean all equipment involved. that is not happening when I still have to go to work later.

what I CAN do, I have discovered today, is pour boiling electric kettle water directly through the spinach in a colander over the sink and then blast it with cold water to achieve the same effect. HAHAHAHAHAHA

[yeslordmyking]

Supernatural Spoonie Side Protagonist (sorry is that cringe...)

OK WRITING AND/OR CHRONICALLY ILL COMMUNITY! (why am I shouting? 🫢)

Please kindly repost or comment on this with analyses of how possible/impossible it would be for a teenage character with a (fictional) chronic illness to:

Go to school- mainly curious about absences/field trips/events like prom. Would homeschool be a better option than public school?

Work part-time- how understanding are employees and coworkers with someone not always well enough to get all their hours in?

Travel long distance- she's an international student living with an adult relative with American citizenship, and seeing a doctor who can help with her rare specific illness (oh yeah she can fly so... factor that into traveling somehow 😂 aaah I don't know what I'm doing!!!)

Fight monsters with superpowers- the character is trying to live a normal life in constant danger of another supernatural race trying to exterminate her own, (which is how she ended up sick btw.) With limited physical abilities, how does overexertion and moderate to severe injury work?

If you need more specifics about the character, feel free to ask me! I know the supernatural element complicates it, so I'm trying to figure out if it's doable and represent chronic illness as best as I can. Thank you so much in advance! 😁