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#i should have known but i didn’t bc i’m a baby trying her best
dontwanderoff · 10 months
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oh toilet cry, i have not missed you
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xmhaoluvr · 1 month
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INVALIDATED; TWS YOUNGJAE x READER
_________ ׂׂૢ་༘࿐
Sobbing was all YOUNGJAE could hear upon entering his shared apartment with his girlfriend. With how loud the sobs were, he knew that she didn’t hear him come home
Changing from shoes to a pair of home slippers, he went to set down his things on the couch before going to their shared room. Once he opened the door, the sobbing immediately stopped and he saw the blankets moving subtly; tried to be subtle at least
He changed into his pajamas before tucking himself next to her and immediately spooning her
“I’m home,” he said, kissing her cheeks ever so lightly a few times before hugging her tightly and then letting loose “Have you eaten?” he nodded upon her question “How about you?” “I did, too”
“…”
“…”
“Are you alright?” he asked, voice soft and in a whisper, trying to not hit a button yet it did. Her tears suddenly started coming out without a warning, her sobs earlier turned into bawling as she turned around to bury her face into his chest
Oh how he hates hearing her cry, especially like this. It’s like he can’t do anything to make her feel better
He caressed her back and head, kissing it from time to time while her clutch on Youngjae never loosened
Once her cries calmed down, he asked her, “Are you willing to tell me?” she nodded and told Youngjae about everything
If Youngjae liked your friends before, he surely didn’t now. The way they made you feel so invalidated was so wrong. And they’ve always done this? Oh he was so ready to confront them for you
“I’m so sorry, baby,” he planted a kiss on the top of her head “If only I knew how you felt, I would’ve tried to do something so that your friends will stop doing that. You deserve to feel and know that your feelings are valid and never a kill-joy. How you feel is important. What they did to you should never be excused, it doesn’t matter if they’re a friend or not, the fact that they kept invalidating your feelings should be an enough sign to cut them off,”
He wiped her teary eyes that listened to every words he said
“But they’re the friends I have…” you said sadly and Youngjae shook his head. He held your face with both of his hands, rubbing his thumb on your cheeks ever so lightly
“You have me, and I can introduce you to my friends! They’re the kindest people I’ve ever known– and! Will never make you feel invalidated”
He placed a light kiss on her forehead, it felt like a feather just dropped by
“I love you so much, love”
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end! sorry if this is bad lol. i wrote this feeling down bc i felt invalidated so this is vv self indulgent 😅 i might make another youngjae one that is better than this and *venting starts here* i just felt so invalidated earlier that i left the group chat :( i wanted comfort and a shoulder to cry on because it wasn’t the first time it happened and i just didn’t know how to confront them *venting ends* i wanted comfort and a shoulder to cry on and youngjae was the first one who came to mind; very chronically online i know lol but he just looks like the type of person to give the best comfort and hug, i love him so much no one will understand ☹️
THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR READING! MY REQUESTS ARE OPEN!!
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aleksa-sims · 6 months
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RL Story
My mother stayed with us. 😩 I was hoping 🙏🙏 that she would leave today, but..... she wouldn’t be such a pain, if she really left after just one night.
And Nico... he has nothing better to do, than talk to me about our probs early in the morning. I just woke up!! I hardly opened my eyes, he already started to dictate to me. He told me not to go to Dominick’s funeral. I was sick and should stay in bed. And well, he was right, so I’m not gonna be at Dominick’s funeral. Tbh, I wouldn’t have been able to handle this well anyway.... N. & I also talked about something else and... I felt much better after our conversation.
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Nico: You’re still mad at me. I get it, but it’s not gonna go on. The stiuation between you & Daniel. I had to talk to him. You told me your version of the story, but I also wanted to hear his opinion, to understand. I think I know why it's so difficult for him to sign the divorce papers. But he’ll explain that to you, as soon as you get better.
Me: What does that mean? I mean... US!
Nico: We both know what we want. We want to stay together and we love our Baby . You don’t want to be with Daniel. You would have stayed with him last week, but you came back home and told me everything. You think you betrayed me. But I see it differently. You backed out at the last moment because... you love me. Even though you were mad at me, you ended up saying no to him.
Me: But I wanted Daniel. And I kissed him.
Nico: Maybe it’s a good thing. At least now you know... what’s important to you.
Me: Your reaction really surprised me... While you’ve changed, I’m still the same insecure person, as I was then. Bcs... I still find it hard to trust you. I mean when you’re abroad for so long. And soon, you'll have to leave anyway.
Nico: You come with me, or I won’t go. I’ll stay home with you.
Me: You didn’t really mean that. And I don’t want you to give up your dream for me.
Nico: You're my dream. If I go abroad without you, then only with the certainty that between us, everything's fine. Or I'll quit soccer.
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Nico: Anyway. Rn you should just focus on our Baby and the pregnancy. The doctor told you yesterday. You need to relax! And I think you should tell your Mom that you increased your dose.
Me: You don't understand that. I’m ashamed of it. You have no idea how I feel about it. The truth is, I suspected it. Somehow I knew our baby was suffering. I felt a tremor in my belly, all day yesterday. I knew our Baby was moving, but it was different than usual. And when the doctor confirmed my guess, I just wanted to die.
Nico: It’s not your fault. The main thing, he's fine.
Me: I always think you’ll blame me one day. But I’m also relieved. It’s not easy to talk about it but as it looks, it works quite well with you.
Nico: I will never blame you. You’re trying your best to get him born healthy.
I kissed N. That moment I felt a.... deep connection between him, me and our baby. I was not that afraid anymore. But suddenly my Mom came up to the bedroom. 🤦‍♀️
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She totally annoyed me!  She was a little stressed out because Nico and I haven’t prepared anything for the baby yet. Besides, I still haven’t divorced Daniel. This has upset her. She was worried.
And why Nico and I had to move out is because his lease was only temporary. We had to decide, whether to extend the contract, or move out. Since his apartment had no nursery, we decided to look for a bigger home. Otherwise, the contract would have been extended for another 2 years. I didn't want that. But if I had known, how long we have waited in the end to move into our new apartment, I would have preferred to stay here. There were delays on the construction site, our apartment was newly built. We had to wait 6 months longer than agreed, until we could move into our new home. Our baby was almost a year old (10 Months) when we could finally move.... Ugh, it’s gonna be... hard for me.
Previous/Next
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spittyfishy · 2 years
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Hey for it chacters thing can u fo either sonia or gundam
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Sonia
Favourite thing about them:
I love how Sonia has interests outside of what’s typically associated with princesses, like true crime and more spooky stuff. It’s a simple but effective way of making her more of a fleshed out character.
Least favourite thing about them:
I don’t know if I have a least favourite thing, most of the issues Sonia has are all writing issues independent of her character, but things like how every once and a while they portray her as suuuper naive when logically she would have known better (looking at you, scene with Teruteru when Hajime is first exploring the island)
BrOTP:
I love her and Gundham as besties, I think it’s really fun, and just prefer that pairing as platonic compared to romantic.
OTP:
Sonia’s one of the few characters that I don’t actually ship with anyone
nOTP:
Sodas my boy and I love him but… as they are now he and Sonia should absolutely not be dating lol (the ship only works in the context of A: they actually worked through stuff and Soda learned how problematic he was being and probably a good amount of time has passed since that behavior stoped, or B: during the despair era bc Sonia wants to feel despair lol)
Random headcanon:
Aromantic Sonia for the win!
Unpopular opinion:
Sonia deserved her spot as a survivor and it’s a good thing she wasn’t killed off just to give character development to the boys
Song I associate with them:
Empire by Beth Crowley, Pomegranate Seeds by Juliana Moon, and Empire from Boo York Boo York! Though tbh they’re all for Remnant Sonia lol
Favourite picture of them:
Sonia Vs The Forces of Evil <3
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Gundham
Favourite thing about them:
Probably just his overall design, it’s a good blend between cool looking and goofy lol
Least favourite thing about them:
I still don’t think I fully understand his plan in the funhouse, if he and Nekumaru really were trying to help everyone else why didn’t Gundham tell everyone he was the blackened? Making everyone go through the trial meant they might all die anyway so like what was the point?
BrOTP:
He and Sonia are best buds and it’s wonderful lol
OTP:
I’m not sure tbh, I’ve only recently come around on liking Gundham so I haven’t really given his ships much thought before lol.
nOTP:
Basically same answer as before sadly, I’ve just never thought about it.
Random headcanon:
Gundham watched just so much Hamtaro as a kid lol, also Zaboomafoo
Unpopular opinion:
I think if Gundham had been out of the game earlier I might have liked him more initially, his whole schtick sort of overstayed its welcome for me.
Song I associate with them:
Crucified by Army of Lovers
Favourite picture of them:
Hands down this Maleficent-y one from my Peko baby au
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satocidal · 1 year
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So, so
My mom randomly came yesterday (she announced me a day prior)
And I didn't want her to come bcs usually at the start of the year when I have to move again and say goodbye to life home and all that I'm a pack of stress and ready to snap any second
And usually she's also snappy when I have to leave home
But now she's…chill
She got that I didn't want her to come home and I explained why and she understood
And she told me it's not the case anymore bcs she got used to the idea now
And like I lost the extra money I was getting from Uni for being top 10 cause I'm not top 10 in my year anymore and she's not mad and told me she knows I did my best
And I just…feel so good and validated bcs last year was such a harsh year on my mental health
Mom is back with good vibes and patience and her psychology understanding and I'm living for it
(I have a really healthy relationship with my mother actually. There are things I don't like or haven't gotten me to the best but she's truly amazing and has always supported me)
Shortly: I'm used to being the gifted child who's at least average in most things and ending at the top and many times I felt like anything lower than that was not allowed so considering I fucked up a bit and mom is understanding healed a part of me 🥺
~🦊
1. Im so proud of you baby—and (it’s ironic that I’m saying it) but it’s always fine yk? Not being at the top or just like anything as long as you try your best. So glad your mom got you the better end of it <3 because like parents should understand fr how impacting the slightest of their actions are
2. Haha this reminded me (ignore this part if you want Lmao) last was really stressful for me in terms of academic (like it’s one of the most important academic year in our country and the grades you get are like somewhat significant) and like school prep you for it and all and so the mock tests and all, I was scoring low (like the highest I got was 75%) because our school is known for making the toughest mock tests right. And my parents kept trying to “solace” me by telling me that they’d be fine if I went for the “easy” options—like I suppose they were trying to be supportive but it rubbed me so wrong Lmao (still does) and it felt over all, condescending. And just yes. So I remember them telling me to not “burn myself out” and that me not studying maths in future was fine by them and that i pressurised myself too much and I think I cried after a decent 4-5 years in front of them. Because like whatever but it fekt so annoying to me because it’s the fact that they used to taunt me when I was 10? When I didn’t get in the top 3 and so I had to work my way up to please them and now, even when I was in top 10 I knew they weren’t happy and then they kept telling me that it’s fine if I just stop maths? 💀idk if it makes sense but it was like heartbreaking for me because I ‘made’ studying a part of me to somewhat Please them initially and now they were saying that they were ok if I didn’t.
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maddam101 · 25 days
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Welcome
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•This is my second blog, idk why I specifically made it but I’m gonna use it for something. Even if it’s for stupid/unnecessary things.
•My personal and OG blog isn’t gonna be as aesthetically pleasing but idc it’s my baby and I like the way it is now. so here, is gonna be the only place I’ll care about the image and visuals on it.
•I would write one-shots but I’m not emotionally stable or emotionally smart/capable of writing romance. There are reasons for it but I’m still learning about it, so for now it’s for private reasons. However, that won’t stop me from sharing my fav songs at the moment (I listen to everything so there’s enough to constantly share). My fav shows, groups, fandom, anime’s, movies, moods, etc etc.
•I’m a fan of almost every fandom you can imagine. Besides furries, 30-year-olds sexualizing and cosplaying as minors from animes (sorry it's a personal problem I have with that specifically), and things like that. (I would never be anything like that but if you are one, don’t take it offensively or personally, I just can’t ever see the reason or attraction to what you like nor will I ever).
•My bday is Jan 1st so I’m like a pure Jan Capricorn, I take that shit with pride too even if I don’t know too much about zodiacs. So if you ever wanna give cool and random facts about them, please do, I love hearing about it. But keep it interesting bc I get bored very easily lol.
•I do say very out-of-pocket things so if you are young and still have to lie about the year you were born to create an account on here, I’d feel more comfortable if you click off, but I know I can’t control you so what you see, read, hear, or find out, is your fault and you can’t blame or take any fault out on me at all even if the root came from me on here. You should’ve known what you possibly can see or find out when you create your Tumblr account. So don’t be a problem we def. Don’t need it.
•also I allow you to vent in my DMs, but do be aware, due to my childhood traumas that have mentally shaped me today, I’m very blunt and can’t give the best advice, I’m more of a fact girlie than an emotional one. So I’ll most likely give some tough love, if you can’t handle it (not in a mean way but in a way meaning, you need to be told gently or kindly) I’m not the person you should be venting to.
•also, I will joke about my absent mother, you can laugh. She’s not here to stop me from making them or stop you from laughing. So don’t feel bad. My trauma is my trauma and I can choose how to act and reflect on it. So I choose to have dark humor. (can't forget about my asshole of a father, boy how I wish he was the one who'd go to the store to get milk 💀. Again, I'm a proud oversharer so leave if you have a problem with it. Like rn. If my humor doesn’t fit with you then don’t comment hateful shit bc I love blocking bitches so try me. N e ways, just scroll past me or leave my blog, I only want good vibes and fun times).
•If you read this all, thanks bc I let Grammarly do the test of the work after typing it and I didn’t read it through all the way, word for word. So congrats (I will later on when I feel like it but not rn)
My personal blog
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violetsandfluff · 2 years
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Bro 💀 hi
not me laying on the couch wishing I had some smut to read 👹 i should be doing other things 😛✌️
bestie ♾ omg sameee 😭 we’re like the same person 😏 !! I needa be finishing Someday My Prince Will Come but… Uhh… just no.
Synopsis: Harry takes Y/N’s virginity and she can’t stop clinging to him 😔 she had no idea such a feeling existed and she won’t let him leave the apartment rip💀warning: degradation and I apologize if any of this is inaccurate or unrealistic bc I am a virgin as well! 🤭 the more you know.
“If you want me to fvck you, you’re going to have to let me go at seven, okay, Baby?” he asked, keeping steady eye contact with her as you nodded. “Early interview. Hey.” he directed her eyes to him. “If anything hurts, tell me.”
“I can put a tampon in,” she smiled proudly. “And it doesn’t hurt!”
“That’s wonderful, my love, but I’m not so sure that applies to my… c0ck.”
Her expression was puzzled to say the least. She looked quizzically at him when he warned her that it might hurt if she wasn’t wet enough.
“How do I know if I’m wet enough?” She asked shakily and Harry responded with a quick, “Only time will tell.”
He began grinding against her and her eyes widened in surprise. Just the friction had her sensitive pussy throbbing. She began sweating from the intense pressure that she felt.
Harry was going to fvck her before the night was over. She felt a warm feeling in the depths of her stomach and she held it in, admiring how sweet it felt.
“Im in control, Y/N,” Harry said slowly, in his thick voice. “That said, if I’m moving too fast for you, please let me know.”
She nodded a silent agreement, but she was just waiting for him to shut his trap so she could enjoy the moment more.
He whisked off her underpants and she nearly squealed as he touched her gently. “You’re kind of wet…” he said gently. The truth was that she was more soaked than he ever could have imagined, but he decided against telling her that. She could learn with time.
He was taking full advantage of her naivety and he wasn’t being subtle about it.
“Such a pretty little pussy, darling,” he commented, hot lips practically brushing against her ears. “I can’t wait to taste it.”
When he said the word taste, it was so crisp and sharp that shivers crawled all along her. “Thank you?” She asked uncertainly and he let out a soft, breathy chuckle beside her ear.
“Don’t thank me yet.” He instructed wryly. “Save it until you’ve had the best fvck of your life.”
Y/N stiffened. She was finally going to lose her virginity. She had kept it like a bad habit for too long. Now she could gift it kindly to her man. She wished she could wrap it and put it under the Christmas tree, but she couldn’t wait.
“Lemme try my fingers,” Harry suggested, inserting a ring cladded finger into her. She gasped at the sensation, unwilling to believe it was real.
“Feel good?”
She could only moan out in response.
“Oh, Y/N,” Harry sighed, a smirk toying at his pink lips. “It’s too early for you to be making such sounds,” he poked his tongue into his cheek to hold on an inevitable laugh before stating, “you’re pretty easy.”
Her eyes shot up. He sounded like he was joking but he looked dead serious.
“Harry… oh my God…” she stuttered and he smirked at her antics.
“You’re precious.” He pulled his fingers out and stared in awe at her dripping entrance. He thrust two of them in and pumped them and Y/N almost screamed with the sensation. It was the best kind of pain imaginable.
He pulled out far too soon and she immediately missed him inside of her. She began clawing feverishly at his briefs and he laughed again at how anxious she was to continue.
“Take a deep breath, my love,” he whispered harshly into her sensitive ears. “We have forever and ever.”
She managed to pull his underwear completely off and he didn’t resist. In all honesty, he had been waiting for this for longer than she ever could have known.
He pulled his fingers from Y/N and she watched in amazed horror as he licked the arousal off his fingers. “Delicious. You’re so sweet, darling,” he said thickly, closing his eyes and groaning softly, just to intrigue her. “You could handle my fingers, Baby,” he gave a genuine smile, unable to mask it. “Good girl. Do you want a cookie? Or should I say, my cockie?”
She nearly went mad upon hearing this from him. As she nodded vigorously, he inserted his fingers back into her and began pumping them ceaselessly. She moaned as his finger curled suddenly, hitting a spot that sent her practically over the edge.
He pulled his fingers abruptly from her once again and she nearly cried, not wanting it to be over. With one smooth motion, he was inside of her, and she hardly had time to react before he was pulling out again.
And going back in. And out. And in. And out. Over and over as sweet moans escaped her reddened lips. She licked them before emitting a wary warning of her rapidly approaching orgasm.
Truthfully, Harry had one of his own on the way, but he continued to edge himself as he watched in awe as her lips fell open and her warm arousal washed onto him.
“Fvck,” he sighed, feeling his own orgasm come through. Y/N now laid limply on his tanned chest, her bed resting perfectly on his tattoos.
“You did wonderful for my, love,” he praised. “You and your little pussy did wonderful.”
She smiled as her orgasm diminished. Looking around, she could feel her pulse in her eyes from the sex she had just had. The sight of the bed was so foreign to her that she just gaped in utter disbelief.
“Better clean up, huh, sweetheart?” Harry asked with a smile. “The bed is covered in cvm.”
She laughed and watched as he cleaned; he had insisted that she should just watch him. The two then got in the shower to wash the evidence of all the love away. They massaged shampoo into each other’s hair and helped detangle kinks that had been worked in by restless fingers.
When they had finished that, they just stood still as the warm water washed over them. Y/N stood closer and closer to Harry as the water fell and she clung to him desperately. He turned the water off and directed her into bed where he tucked her in wearing just a pair of underwear and an old t-shirt.
“You gonna be okay alone now, Babe?” He asked and she responded with a tearful no.
He tried to leave but she grabbed at him relentlessly until he eventually gave in. He pulled himself into the covers beside her and cuddled her all night long.
She slept soundly, oblivious to the dirty secrets he whispered into her ears.
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yesimwriting · 3 years
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hiii, this might seem weird but do u have any head cannons for when the reader is pregnant and how the Darkling would react?
a/n love this concept,, it's not weird at all!! i feel like there's so much here!! also i leave for college this month and im lowkey starting to freak out so ive been watching star wars movies for comfort 😭and now i have half a mind to write for them, especially the prequels (cough, cough,, anakin) 😭 😭 that should tell you where i am mentally
anyways lets get into the headcanons:))
--
- okay so like most of my headcanons, this is probably going to be all over the place bc i feel like so many different things could change how he would react. Like if the darkling x reader have been trying to get pregnant, or an unplanned pregnancy with someone he really likes, i also think whether or not the reader is a grisha affects his reaction too
- in general though, i think he'd lowkey have a breeding kink he'd def find something about the thought of you having his child really attractive bc for one thing, he wouldn't have to worry about being left alone and now he has an excuse to be a real 'protector'.
- also if youve read my other headcanons i am 100000% convinced that he has this thing where if he really likes someone he needs them to need him (let's all remember the whole 'i will strip you of everything you know and love speech until I'm your only shelter' speech he gave to Alina)
- also i kinda want to write a fic or blurb series or something that's just the darkling being super toxic in super thoughtful ways LMAO if that makes sense, like he's being super sweet but it's to make sure the reader is dependent on him
- and he def wants to be the protector to give himself some sense of assurance bc he's so desperate to not be alone anymore and bc the reader is the only person he has/loves, he wants to feel in control and like he's the less attached one
- okay,, let's get back to the pregnancy thing, anyways, your pregnancy is most definitely activating all of those senses and this was meant to be a sub plot but it kind of became it's own thing lol
- so lets get to the actual pregnancy reaction
if you two have been trying to get pregnant:
- when you tell him, he kind of like, pauses bc it's not every day that he gets surprised so it takes him a moment to register that he's experiencing shock lol, so he tenses and goes islent
- and then after he realizes that he's surprised and that it's bc of a good thing, he manages to relax
- meanwhile you're kind of freaking out bc he got so quiet?? you start to wonder if he's regretting ever wanting a child with you? and you're like two seconds away from a downspiral and then he...
- he touches your cheek and looks at you in a way you've never seen him look at anyone,, not even you
- the look is so warm and strong and full of fierce admiration that you feel foolish for ever thinking he didn't want this. And then he says something about how you're carrying his child and how he didn't realize he could adore you more and then he kisses you and it's all :)) warm:)
- he doesn't want anyone to know that he's expecting a child as long as possible bc of how many enemies he has and how he has to worry about you enough when people just know that you're his 'lover' (a title you never really liked, but one he tells you is necessary to make sure no one realizes the extent of his attachment)
- if you really want to tell your mother or someone of that relation, he won't be mad about it, but he just needs to know
- Genya is the only exception bc the darkling basically instructs her to look out for you,, but when you tell her she's like oh?? you guys just found out?
- miss girl most definitely noticed like a day and a half ago after you cried bc she couldn't find you ice cream the other night 😭and she just assumed you knew but weren't ready to tell anyone
- okay so this what i think is his most problematic expecting father trait would be. So i just ranted about how important secrecy would be to him but he's also the most overprotective person in the entire world,, like he was bad before but once he knows your with child?? yeah, if a man asks you about the weather, he's done for
- he's next to you in a second, ordering either you or the man to do some asinine task
- if you get mad about this (rightfully so) or even just point out how nothing is wrong and you having a casual conversation with a man who isn't even looking at you sexually won't hurt you or the baby, he'll lose rationality
- it depends on how much you push, but it'd be super easy to make him super possessive bc like i said, being bonded by a child has made him so much more intense (and he was pretty intense before)
- and if you push too much he'll lowkey forget about how cautious he's trying to be with you and pin you against the nearest wall and say something along the lines of 'are you already forgetting you're mine? that i own you, body and soul--is my child growing in you not enough of a reminder? because i'll give you another one if you need it.' (AH--i want to write a whole fic based on this line)
- also if the reader is grisha, especially if she's a sun summoner/special grisha like him, he def talks about the power that they've created and how proud he already is and how he can't wait to train together and be the most powerful family in the world
- not everything is perfectly happy though, bc now he feels more pressure to complete his plan and establish the world he wants his child to be born into
- so sometimes when he's working extra hard or is extra aggressive for no reason, you have to work at calming him down and reminding him that the best thing he can do for his child is be there for them (and the child's mother,, lol)
- sometimes he'll respond by actually listening to you and trying to make up for his absence or his aggression by being extra soft until you finally forgive him
- you never last that long, it's hard to be mad at him when he's coddling you and whispering such sweet things about he's so happy to have you and your future child
- overall, his first reaction is to swell with emotion, which he isn't used to, and so he becomes super protective but also extra lovey and you know that his overreactions are just him trying to show that he cares about you and your future child more than anything
If the pregnancy was unplanned:
- the initial reaction is pretty similar, only his state of shock lasts longer
- like i said at the beginning, he's not used to being surprised and an accidental pregnancy is so much more surprising than a planned pregnancy
- this really sucks for you bc he's not exactly known for his patience so you just kinda sit there and genuinely wonder if you're going to be a single mom or if you're going to want to deletus the fetus or something
- but then he takes a step towards you and you see how he's looking at you and you just know that that fierceness has to mean something good
- and at this point you're scared and nervous and feel so alone so tears are pricking at your eyes,, so he wipes his thumb across your cheek to wipe away tears you won't let spill
- he then whispers something really sweet about how you two are now together forever, as you should be
- it's really relieving bc you felt so alone and uncertain and he's such a smooth speaker that by the end of the night, you feel like this is a good thing
- if youre still hesitant/weighing your options, he's not above trying to (gently) manipulate you into thinking that what he wants may be the only way
- by that,, i don't mean outright tricking you bc he means everything he says, but he def is pushing the keeping the baby agenda,, especially if you're a grisha,, and even more so if you're a grisha with similar power levels to him
- he won't get angry at first bc he's not so out of touch that he's unaware of how shocking a pregnancy is to a woman who wasn't planning one,, but his patience is limited and if you fight it too much he will get mad and yell
- but unless you really don't want to have a child, it won't get to that bc he makes the idea of having a baby with him sound so perfect?? like you genuinely don't understand how he did that
- he chases away all of your worries and assures you that youre not alone and that even though it isn't planned he wouldn't rather anyone else carry his child
- the initial conversation would probably end in you two sleeping together again bc he finds the fact that you're carrying his child so attractive and bc being aware of the pregnancy makes him more possessive
- it's also a good way to fight any of your doubts
- speaking of being possessive though,, i feel like he could be a little more possessive/protective of a reader who didn't plan on getting pregnant bc your relationship has been less established
- no one sees you as anything to him and he doesn't want to start rumors now bc it's important to him that his enemies don't find out about you or his future child so he doesn't want that to change
- but he almost forgets about all of those reasons each time he sees a man get a little too close,, especially if that guy is flirty
- it takes all of his will power to not just go 'she's mine and if i wasn't worried about the stress that witnessing something violent would cause our unborn child, you'd be dead already, but if you're not gone by the time i turn around, i'll forget about caution'
- lots of close calls ngl!! at one point youre like 'if it bothers you so much, maybe you should tell someone??' and he's like 'no,, maybe,, shut up' and then you raise one eyebrow and he just closes his mouth and is like 'i mean,, i'll kiss you to shut you up, haha--dont be mad'
- youre the one that's pregnant but sometimes you think he might be the one experiencing the mood swings i swear 😭
- so your little theory gets tested,, he's not the type to gossip with his besties and be like 'guess who's officially my girlfriend, i knocked her up but it's not like it sounds--'
- so he's like ig you can tell genya
- once again genya is like ?? yall thought you were keeping that secret? couldn't be me
- but having it a little out in the open helps ease him just enough that youre actually capable of consoling him when he becomes jealous
- still though,, he's quick to go into possessive/pregnancy kink sex
- youre most def not mad about it,, unless pregnancy has you particularly sore
- he's normally pretty understanding about that and def doesn't mind pulling his weight in the bedroom when he needs
- honestly he'd be really good at being a source of calmness at the beginning, but as time goes on he becomes more and more worried about finishing his plans bc he didn't expect to have a child right now
- so he'd be more adamant about working/becoming more tense and would be more difficult to console if it was an accidental pregnancy
- when you call him out on it--or on anything while your pregnant--it's frustrating for you both bc the number one thing everyone knows is stress is bad for baby, so he's trying to keep you calm without backing down
- these argument always end with one of you clinging to the other,, and then the more angrier of the two just like shuts up, rolls their eyes, and lets go of the argument...at least for now
- the main difference between an accidental and intentional pregnancy would probably be how you perceive him,, bc an intentional pregnancy means youve talked about things but since you havent talked about anything your shocked about how soft he becomes ??
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bloodycassian · 3 years
Text
COLD NIGHTS - Cassian x Azriel x Reader - Prompt: 
hi i love your work so much!!! I was thinking a cassian x azriel x reader (i just love them sm, why have one when you can have two ) where the reader is sister of a high lord maybe day or winter court, and reader goes missing (kinda angsty) and her brother (a high lord) panics and goes to the night court for help (bc if her two bat boys can’t find her who will)  and az and cassian go full on panic mode and search for the reader, i was also thinking a fluffy cute ending where reader is just cuddling with azriel and cassian while her wounds heal take as much time as you need to write this, don’t pressure yourself. Take care lovely
Kallis would never forget the screams. The terror and panic that rushed through him when he realised that you were gone.  He sent half the city to search for you. He called upon Helion to inspect the magic. He was frantic in finding you. But it was like you had just disappeared out of nowhere. No sign of struggle, not a drop of blood spilled. The offender was sloppy in their ways, but their magic was strong. Helion could sense it.  They had a deathwish from Kallis himself if he ever found them. +  The first thing you saw were your cracked and bloody hands. They were split open from the dry cold wind. Sea air drifted into the cave. The cold brutal howling outside mixed with the roar of waves breaking confirmed your nightmares. Cape Tragedy. 
The islands off the coast of winter were known for their unforgiving nature to ships. Hence their name, Cape Tragedy. Also known as the Tragic coast, no stories were ever heard of any survivors of those crashes. If they had managed to survive the churning water, then the false salvation of the islands would kill them. It happened often enough that there were lighthouses set atop many of the bigger islands for ships to avoid on stormy days.
You coughed from the dry air, earning a pair of yellow eyes to dart to you. One of the three lesser fae males noticed you were awake and clapped. "She wakes! We've been waiting for you, sweetheart." His green skin was pale in the overcast light streaming in from the mouth of the cave. Snow Bear pelts lay all around. A disgrace in your culture. No citizen of Winter court would do such a thing. You looked to the walls to find weapons, and strange markings along the stone. Sailors from far away lands. 
Not even sailors. Pirates. A chill ran through you.  
"We're going to get your weight in gold, pretty one." The scaled male curled a piece of your hair behind you ear. Your stomach turned, and you tried to scoot away. "My brother will kill you first. And he'll take a long time doing it." You promised, trying to make your voice sound strong. Terror had you by it's grip though, and it was hard to do anything other than panic
. "Your brother? The pretty one that shears the Elk?" The green one asked. You laughed, and then were hissing in pain when the scaled male yanked on your hair. "What's so funny?" 
"You think my brother is an elk herder?" You spat "You must be dumber than you look." The males glanced between each other, then to the one who hadn't said anything yet.
"Who ye think you are then?" The male holding your hair stammered, trying to keep his panic under wraps. 
"Kallis' sister." You said with deadly calm. "And the high lord does not negotiate." 
"If you're so noble why you got such a mouth on ye?" The third male finally spoke.
They laughed.
"Maybe we will see just how much of a mouth-" He started again. He didnt have a chance to finish his disgusting words. You kicked, bending an ice spear straight up from the rocky ice floor and through the third male's body. Then the beating from the other two came. 
They bound your wrists and ankles in rope and tar. Their hands shook when they did it. It gave you a small bit of satisfaction. The potion they gave you to knock you out was just barely strong enough. You fought it as best you could, but it won. You could only hear the faint sounds of arguing then a crash of glass, then the cold winds whipping around you. And when you woke, your body ached.  The cold bit into your limbs. Your fingers were pale. Far too pale to be healthy. You knew frostbite when you saw it. Your body refused to move under your own power. Your blood was frozen to the icy ground. They had used a potion and transported you to a peninsula, and you could only faintly hear the ocean below. You could feel the potion wearing off, but you knew you weren't healing. Not yet. You reached down into your own mind, picking up the fading tendrils of power. Of your bond to the two you knew could save you. And you pulled as hard as you could manage.  --- "Fuck." The roaring thought shook Cassian awake. Bleary eyed, he glanced about the room as if there was someone actually shouting at him.  Then he felt it. The weak tug that had been silent for so long. And he knew it was nothing good. Frenzied, he met Azriel at the dining area. Where they spent the rest of the night planning, deducing a probable reason for you to be calling so weakly. They sent their worries to Rhys, but they were shooed away. "I'm researching. Meet me in the library at dawn." The two males tried to comfort each other. But the worry pulsating through the bond was too much to focus on. So they waited. Kallis appeared that morning. He spat his story and begged for help, practically in tears as he spoke to the three Illyrians. Cassian and Az knew something was wrong the moment you were attacked. Court laws forbade them interfering on Winter Court territory though.  As soon as the approval was given, the brothers winnowed to the border of Winter and started flying. + You were coming to terms that you would die in the cold. You had imagined death differently. Battle was the primary way you thought you'd die. Or at the end of a High Lord's magic for being too much of an advisor. Smiling at the memory of putting Tamlin in his place, you gave another tug down the bonds to your mates. And like a snap, they both tugged back. Almost in unison. It was hard to tell. You closed your eyes, listening to the soft waves below. They lulled you into a cold sleep yet again.  + Despite the cold, the Illyrians flew as fast as they could. They could sense your light fading, and chased it for mile after mile. Their wings cut through the harsh winter winds, fueled by rage and desperation. Then they spotted the dark figure frozen to the snow below. Cassian landed first, a few feet away. The ice cracked beneath him. "Get us out of here." He growled to Azriel.  "We need to make sure she's okay before we move."  Cassian growled, but didn't protest. Azriel understood. He felt the anguish and frustration through the shared bond. Az's hands pressed gently to your neck, checking your pulse. He swore. "Baby, we need you to wake up for us. We're here. We got you." Cassian put a hand to your cheek and fought back the tears that threatened.  You groaned in response. They both sighed in relief, their breath making clouds in front of them. "I'm stuck..." You managed through your stiff jaw.  Cassian stroked a thumb over your cheek. "Stuck? Honey you're-"  "Cas..." Azriel nodded to your side, to the ice that crept its way up your damp clothes. Azriel could have taken a very very long time torturing the beasts that did this to his mate. The rage coiled in his gut at the sight of your injuries. The only reason you hadn't bled out was the blood and water mix turning your wounds to ice.  Cassian pulled at the ice web that encapsulated you. Under the heat of his rage it broke, and broke and broke. Azriel placed small patches of his shield over your frostbitten fingers. "We're gonna get you out of here. Just stay still." Azriel smoothed back your hair, and darkness swirled over you. The change from the harsh overcast light of Winter court to the soft sun of Night court was jarring.  Madja put her hands on you and you were asleep in an instant. Her warm hands were a blessing from the Mother.  +  "She's lucky she has that Winter blood in her or she'd be dead." Madja wiped her hands off and handed both the Illyrians a small vial. "That is the scrap from a poisoned sword that broke off in her shoulder. I got all the pieces out, but the poison lingers. It may heal slowly, but it should get better."  Anguish burned both of their stomachs. Azriel's throat tightened and he looked away, but gripped the vial tightly. Cassian stared at it, his eyes murderous. Madja left without another word. "She was almost killed. And we couldn't do anything." Cassians' voice was low, with violence dripping from it. "We need her here. In Velaris where we can... watch her." He didn't know what he was saying, but the instinct to protect was overriding every other logical thought he had. Anger burned and burned in his stomach, swallowing him with rage. He could feel Az mirroring the same feeling, but with a cold deadliness that begged to simmer out of him.  "You know she wont go for that. She loves her home too much. Her brother." Azriel whispered back. "We're her mates. She should be with us." Cassian was looking for a fight. All the tension and anger of the day had to be worked out. Azriel felt it too. His shadows ran anxiously through the room.
The wind outside howled. It shifted the dark clouds that covered the moon. It seemed to be a cold day in all of Prythian. A cold day in your mates hearts to the pirates that had taken you. They spoke their rage mind to mind, imagining the ways to torture the bastards. 
How to find them would be the first priority. Azriel kept circling back to that part. + The healer cleared his throat at the door. "She's asking for you." He nodded to Rhys' brothers. They left Rhys behind in unison, walking in perfect step with each other. Their minds hummed together over that bond they shared with you. "Protect protect protect." They both seemed to demand.  Azriel knocked softly, his heart flipping when he heard your voice again. "Get in here." You demanded, giving them a broad smile when they practically shoved each other out of the way. 
"Come keep me warm." You weakly folded the blanket back, exposing some of the bruising on your skin. 
They complied with enthusiasm. Azriel's hands were cold at first, but they got better when he reached around you to hold Cassian closer. They worked in tandem to keep you covered, making sure that you weren't too crowded or too warm. Azriel summoned his cool shadows when you got too warm and had to kick the blankets off. Cassian's warm breath would keep you warm when they became too much. You traced Azriel's cheekbones, the sharp edge of his jaw while falling alseep. Cassian's muscled forearms hugging you from behind were like a heavy pillow. 
"Rest now, we can have more fun later." Az winked, making your stomach flutter. Cassian groaned and pulled you further to his lap. You tried not to think of the hardness that pressed to you now.  "Goodnight." The shadowsinger kissed your forehead and like a light, you were out. Finally resting peacefully wrapped between your two mates and their warm bond you all shared. 
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leossmoonn · 3 years
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can i request a fic with stefan where the reader loses her memories (like stefan did in s5) so stefan takes her out to all the places that are special to their relationship and he tells her all about how they used to date and how she loved him and all and then at the end she kisses him ❤️
if not that's okay! have a good day and make sure to drink some water ❤️❤️
okay ill be honest i dont remember anything of tvd from season 4 and on bc it was just so boring to me but YES I CAN DK THIS. and thank you! i hope you have a good day, and hydrate too <33 mwah!
masterlist
warnings / includes - mild language, crying, sad stefan, kissing, eating and food, talk about sex. oh and youre a vampire and grew up w stefan and damon :)) and you’ve been dating stefan ever since you two turned into vampires and you two have been married for 50 years! (yay) . not really edited
————
“can’t you just do your voodoo magic and fix her?”
“that’s not how it works, damon.”
“well, it works whenever elena needs it. just admit it, you don’t like y/n.”
“i do! this is just more complicated -”
“bullshit! i know you don’t know her very well, but we’ve known her since she was born. she’s my best friend and the love of my brother’s life, who, by the way, is about to go into a frenzy if you don’t fix her!”
“i’m trying! but whatever those traveler’s did, i don’t think i can reverse it.”
“argh!” damon growled, putting his hands under a table and ripping it up.
“okay, you need to calm down,” bonnie said. “throwing a fit won’t help.”
“well, i can’t just stand here and watch her die!”
“she’s not dying, she’s just asleep. the doctor said she will wake up soon.”
“oh, as if the doctor knows anything,” damon muttered.
“she actually knows a lot, and we’ll give her the treatments the doctor recommends before we try any magic.”
damon sighed, running his hands over his face. he looked over to you, tears prickling at the corner of his eyes. he walked over to you, holding your hand in his.
“please wake up, y/n. please.”
it seemed as damon’s wishes were granted. your eyes fluttered open, a soft groan filled your throat as you tried to move your head back and forth. you peered at bonnie and damon, brows furrowing.
“who are you? and why-why are you holding my hand? get away from me!” you hissed, barring your fangs.
“well, she definitely knows she a vampire,” damon muttered.
bonnie ignored him, coming over to you tentatively. “hey, y/n. do you know who i am?”
“no. i-i want to go home. where am i? why-why does this look so strange? hospitals at home don’t look like this,” you gasped as you looked around your room.
“is she still stuck in the 1800s?” bonnie asked.
“let’s see. uh, y/n, what’s the date?” damon asked.
“1866, right?” you guessed.
“oh, shit,” damon muttered.
“what’s wrong?” you frowned. “y/n, you’re in the 21st century. it’s 2013,” bonnie explained.
your eyes bugged out of your head. “what? how-how can this be? you’re lying! you’re some witch! katherine warned me that you would try to trick me. who are you with? wha-what do you want from me?!”
“okay, crazy pants,” damon sighed. “do you know who i am?” he asked.
you took a good, hard look. “you look familiar… like you’re from a dream.”
“good, good, but do you know my name?”
your brain scrambled for the answer, but it all came up was blank.
“no, i’m sorry.”
“well, crap,” damon muttered. “what if we get stefan? he’s been her boyfriend for like, a hundred and fifty years. plus, they’ve been married for 50. she’s got to remember him,” bonnie suggested.
“yeah, okay,” damon nodded. “go and get him. i’ll stay with her.”
“why don’t i stay with her, and you go get stefan. you might irritate her enough to make her snap your neck,” bonnie snorted.
“fine. i’ll be back in a second. try to use your powers on her,” damon asked.
“no. now go,” bonnie shooed away damon.
he left, zooming through the halls to go and find his brother. meanwhile, bonnie went to sit next to you, taking your hand in hers.
“what are you doing. i said don’t touch me,” you hissed.
“what is your name?” bonnie asked.
“y/n,” you said. “what’s your full name?” she asked.
“y/n l/n,” you answered. “why are you asking me this? do you think i do not know my name?”
“no, no. i just…” bonnie sighed. “what’s your mother’s name?”
“louise,” you said. “and your father’s?” bonnie asked.
“martin. and before you ask, my sister and brother’s names are anna and christopher. are you studying me or something? oh, my… i-i swear i’m not dangerous. i don’t feed on people. not usually, anyways. please, spare me. if you want a real vampire, catch katherine pierce. her real name is katerina petrova. or klaus mikaelson, his whole family needs to be killed. please, i -”
“i’m not going to kill you. no one is going to kill you. and katherine is already dead,” bonnie explained.
“oh, really? well, then ignore what i said about her."
bonnie smiled a little. “it’s alright. do you remember anything that’s happened in the last 24 hours?”
“no, i’m sorry. i must ask again, where am i?” you questioned.
“well, you’re in 2013. about one hundred and forty-nine years from when you were turned into a vampire. that man who was here is damon salvatore. he’s been your best friend ever since you were born. you grew up together, and he turned you into a vampire. i’m bonnie bennett. i am… i have a sort of friendship with damon. i’m a witch from the bennett line. i am here to help you. we’re friends, too, actually.”
“oh,” you pursed your lips. “i’m sorry i don’t remember you. i think i remember one of your family members, though… emma, ella, em-”
“emily, yeah,” bonnie smiled. “well, it’s good to know i’m in good company,” you sighed.
“yes, you are. oh, and there’s one more person i forgot to mention. he’s damon’s brother, stefan. he’s your -”
“y/n!”
your head snapped to the door. a handsome young man stepped into the room, worrying filing his features.
“hello?” you frowned.
“it’s me, stefan. you’re husband,” the man said.
your eyes widened. “i-i- excuse me? my husband? i didn’t know i was-” your breath hitched as you saw the ring on your finger. it was a beautiful silver ring with a blue jewel in the middle, stefan and your name carved in the middle of it.
“oh,” you gasped.
“do you remember me?” he asked, coming closer to you.
you looked back up at him, furrowing your brows as you tried to remember. you shook your head in disappointment. “no, i’m sorry. i wish i could. what happened to me that i can’t remember my own husband?"
“travelers took your memory,” bonnie answered. “travelers? l-like the evil witches?” you guessed.
“yes, precisely,” bonnie nodded.
“well, can you get back my memories? you’re a witch, right?” you asked her.
“exactly! that’s what i was saying. i’m so glad someone gets it!” damon exclaimed.
“i-i’m sorry, who are you again?” you frowned. “damon. i’m damon salvatore. the best salvatore, and your best friend,” he grinned.
“oh, right - damon. and you’re uh, you’re bonnie, correct?” you turned to the brunette.
“i am,” bonnie nodded.
“and you’re…“ you turned to stefan.
hope was shining in his dazzling green eyes. his lips were pulled into a frown, his brows furrowed as tears clouded his eyes.
“you’re stefan! my, uh, my husband whom i can’t remember. i’m so sorry, again.”
“it’s okay,” he sighed. “you just woke up. you’ll probably remember later.”
“yes,” you nodded, “that’s probably it.”
just then, the doctor came in. she checked you out, telling you that you had to stay in the hospital one more night before you could be discharged. after she left, damon, bonnie, and stefan made up a plan.
“i can’t just put her memories back. i don’t have any access to them,” bonnie said.
“can’t you just pull them out of the air or something?” damon asked.
“magic doesn’t work like that, damon,” bonnie glared.
“what if we take her to all her favorite places? places she’s been to lots of times,” stefan suggested.
“yes! that is a great idea, except for the fact that she thinks she’s in the 1800s and most things that were there have been torn down or rebuilt!” damon seethed.
“well, then what else are we supposed to do, damon! we can’t just sit here and hope that her memories will come back. what if they never do!” stefan yelled.
“shut up you two! you’re scaring her!” bonnie hit both of them, then pointing to you.
both of the salvatore’s face softened as they saw your eyes wide with fear.
“look, she doesn’t know you two yet. she doesn’t trust you two. she literally thought we were going to capture her for being a vampire. we need to just take it easy and gain her trust, which won’t be hard, i hope. but i think that stefan’s idea is great. and stefan, you should be the one to do it. you deserve to build the strongest bond with her and to spend the most time with her,” bonnie explained.
stefan smiled at her gratefully. “thank you, bonnie.”
“of course, stefan,” she smiled back at him.
“what about me! i was her friend before you were even born!” damon poked stefan.
“she was literally a baby, damon. she didn’t even know who you were,” stefan scoffed.
“oh, she did. and she loved playing peek-a-boo with me,” damon huffed.
“well, i’ve been her actual best friend just a few months after she was born. you’ve been like the brother she’s never had,” stefan stated.
“same difference.” damon rolled his eyes.
“b-bonnie?” you stammered.
“yeah, what do you need?” bonnie came over to you immediately.
“um, i need to use the bathroom.” you whispered.
“oh, yeah, of course. gentlemen, please exit the room.” bonnie said to the two men.
“alright. hey, y/n, you hungry? we can get you something to eat,” damon asked.
“yes. i’m famished, honestly. um, can i have some meatloaf, please? with some wine?” you requested.
“um, y/n, i’m afraid to inform you that -” damon started, but stefan cut him off.
“we’ll see what we can find,” stefan said.
“thank you… stefan, was it?” you guessed.
“yeah. it’s stefan,” he smiled. “okay, c’mon, lover boy. the lady needs to use the restroom,” damon grabbed stefan, dragging him out of your room and shutting the door.
bonnie then helped you out of the bed and into the restroom, waiting behind the door until you called for help.
“thank you so much. your kindness is very much appreciated.” you smiled at her as she helped you back to bed.
“it’s not a problem.” bonnie sighed with a smile.
“will you be able to get my memories back?” you asked.
“um… no. not right now, i’m sorry,” bonnie frowned.
“oh, well, it’s alright. maybe it’s for the better. i can’t imagine all the horrible things i must have done to you and your friends,” you laughed sourly.
“what do you mean?” bonnie asked.
“well, i… i overheard you a little when i was waking up. damon said that you didn’t like me much. i don’t blame you, i mean, i can be crass and judgmental, but i’ve changed over the years. i-i think, at least. otherwise i suppose i would be dead from those travelers now. no one wants to help a horrible person,” you explained.
“well, you’re not horrible, at all. for someone who has been with damon for like, almost two hundred years, you’re very kind. you’re also very funny and you try to help people the best you can.”
“oh, thank you,” you smiled shyly. “um… what do you mean about being with damon?”
“oh, he’s just um… not my favorite person to be around is all. you’ll see,” bonnie chuckled.
“i think i have, a little,” you giggled. “but he seems to care a lot about me. i suppose he’s known me since i’ve been born.”
“no, he does. honestly, like stefan said earlier, damon is the older brother you never bad.”
“and stefan, he is supposed to be my best friend and lover?”
bonnie smiled, “yes.”
“can you tell me about stefan? do-do you know him well?” you asked.
“i do, actually. he’s so kind, always wanting to help people and be the best. i swear, he works himself to death trying to be the hero. he’s very level-headed and extremely smart. he’s more mellow than damon, definitely, but he has his funny, savage moments. he’s dealt with a lot of pain in his years, and you’ve been there to experience it all. in fact, he always tells us how you are his light. it’s really sweet. i wish someone talked about me like that.”
heat crept up your neck and you couldn’t help but smile. “well, i understand why i fell in love with him, then.”
bonnie chuckled, “yeah, he’s a great guy. he’s probably more rough around the edges now than he used to be, though.”
“well, that’s what happens when you’ve lived for so long,” you chuckled. “i personally think i’ve softened over the years. i remember when i was a little girl, i used to be so quick and temperamental. my mother always tried to reprimand me, but i had a mind of my own, i guess. or that’s what my father used to say. now that i think about it, i think stefan is the reason why i have changed. he’s seemed to rub off on me.”
“wait, are you starting to get your memory back?” bonnie asked, getting excited.
“no, i’m afraid not. well, not of current things. i just am remembering things about myself. i still don’t remember damon or stefan,” you frowned
“oh, well, it’s okay. you only woke up an hour ago. we’ll give it time.” bonnie patted your arm.
“thank you. you must forgive me, i’ve always had a horrible memory. and now with mine taken away, i probably will be a burden.”
“no, no,” bonnie shook her head. “please, you’re our friend. i’m sorry if damon made it seem like i don’t like you, but i do. we just don’t spend time with each other that much, but we definitely will now.”
“i hope you don’t mind it, then.”
“i definitely don’t, don’t worry.”
you two sat in a comfortable silence, stefan and damon coming back only a few minutes later.
“so, you can’t have any wine, so we got you the next best thing: grape juice. and we also didn’t find any meatloaf, but we did find some spaghetti and meatballs,” damon said, setting it all down on the table.
“oh, thank you two so much.” you smiled. you began to get up, your feet slipping suddenly.
stefan rushed to catch you, his hands going under your arms. your eyes met his immediately, your breath getting caught in your lungs. you fell into a sort of a daze as he lifted you back up on your feet.
“my, you’re handsome,” you muttered.
“thank you. you’re beautiful,” stefan smiled.
your jaw fell open, your eyes widening. “o-oh. did i say that out loud? i am so sorry -”
“no, it’s okay. it was really nice to hear that,” he assured you.
“alright, thank you,” you smiled. “of course. my pleasure.” he let go of you, pulling out a chair.
“so, i say we compel the doctor to let you go home now so we can get this show on the road!” damon announced.
“no, they need to monitor her-”
“she’s a freaking vampire, bonnie!” damon exclaimed in a hushed whisper. he then turned to you. “you feel fine, right?”
“yes. a lot better now that i’ve eaten,” you answered.
damon grinned, clapping his hands. “see? she’s fine. i say we get her into her room and let her sleep in her bed.”
“damon, that’s not-”
“excuse me,” you interrupted stefan, peering at him through your eyes. “if you don’t mind me interjecting, i’d quite like to go home. and damon is right, i am a vampire so besides my memories, my body has healed me completely.”
stefan looked at you for a few moments, sighing before talking again. “yeah, that makes sense. are you sure you’re okay to go home? i mean, you almost slipped -”
“i am okay, stefan,” you smiled. “these floors are quite slippery with these socks on.” you moved your feet to show them.
“right,” he nodded. “okay, well, damon? i assume i can trust you to compel the doctors?”
“on it!” damon grinned, rushing out the door.
“is he always this eager to help?” you asked. “only when it comes to you,” stefan chuckled.
“well, i suppose that’s okay, for now,” you hummed.
“yes. you are our first priority,” stefan smiled.
“oh, please don’t let me ruin your daily routine. like you said, damon likes helping me. he seems to not have anything important to do, anyways, no offense.” you lowered your head sheepishly. “but he can help me while you two go to school and such. do you go to high school still?”
“no, we don’t. well, stefan doesn’t, anyways,” bonnie chuckled. “i’m going to college in the fall.”
“oh, that’s wonderful! i see the women have made lots of improvements. what are you going to study?” you asked.
“research and analysis. it’s not really a study, but that’s what i’m majoring in.”
“wow, you must be so smart, then. good for you. i wish i went to college,” you frowned slightly. “
“you did,” stefan spoke up. “oh? what did i study?” you perked up.
“literature. you went around the world teaching english and literature. part of it was to fit in as a human, but another part was because you always had a passion for it.”
“sounds like me,” you smiled. “i loved reading so much. i remember my mother had to hide my books for when we ate dinner.”
“woah, you’re remembering things now?” damon walked into the toom
“not really. i’m only remembering things about myself and my family.”
“damn,” damon muttered. “it’s alright,” stefan said. “anyways, we good to go?”
“indeed we are. let’s roll,” damon said.
stefan helped you out of your seat. you took out your IV, damon rushing you to his car.
“wow. this is beautiful,” you admired his chevy.
“i know! she’s my pride and joy.” damon sighed happily as he opened the door for you.
“thank you,” you smiled at him. he returned the smile, getting into the passenger seat.
“i’ll drive her home, i-”
“actually, can stefan drive me? i’d like to get to know him more. he is my husband, after all,” you said.
stefan’s chest swelled with happiness, his lips upturning into a bright smile.
“i suppose. don’t total my car,” damon warned stefan.
“no promises,” stefan smirked, getting in the driver’s seat. “you know i’m kidding, right? i won’t crash the car.”
“i know, don’t worry,” you smiled. “great,” stefan breathed out as he started the car.
“this is amazing technology. so much faster than the horses.”
“yep. it’s amazing how far we’ve come.”
you nodded, turning your head to look at him. you looked down at his left hand, smiling a little as you saw a silver wedding band.
“how long have we been married for?” you asked.
“50 years. 51 this summer,” he answered. “how long did we date for?” you asked.
“well, we actually didn’t date until we turned vampires. as you probably know, your emotions are heightened once you turn. and our crushes on each other were just too much to ignore, we started dating. we helped each other out a lot, you helped more than me. i mean, i-i was a wreck. with katherine turning us into vampires and all, me killing my dad, damon abandoning me. you were the only person who stuck by me. you know, you were, and still are, my light,” he explained.
you grinned, “bonnie told me that that’s what you call me.”
“ah, she’s told you about me, then. what did she say?” he asked.
“well, she said that you’re very kind and are always wanting to help people. she also said that you are smart and serious, but that you have your breaking moments. she also said that you have experienced a lot of pain. i am sorry to hear that,” you frowned.
“bonnie is very kind. too kind, actually.”
“oh, don’t say that. i happen to think it’s all true. just from what i’ve seen today.”
“thank you. i’m glad i’ve made a good impression.”
“well, you are my husband, so i would think that what bonnie said is true.”
“makes sense,” he nodded. “so, where do i live? with you, i presume?” you questioned.
“yes, and with damon. we live in the salvatore boarding house. it was built for uh, well, boarding in mystic falls.”
“do we have separate rooms?” you asked.
“u-um, no. but, if you’re not comfortable with that, there are plenty of spare rooms-"
"no," you said quickly.
stefan glanced at you, eyes wide in surprise. you chuckled awkwardly, scratching the back of your neck.
"u-um, what i mean is that it is okay. i'll get to know your quicker if we share a room. just um, let me have my privacy?" you requested.
"of course, of course," he nodded. "lovely," you exhaled deeply.
you looked out of your window, observing all the people walking around town square.
"so much has changed," you said, a little nostalgic.
"i know, it's crazy," stefan laughed. "but, i'll take you to all the old places we used to go, and the new ones you have gown accustomed to."
"sounds like a deal. you know, i'm excited. is that um… strange that i am so lively after having just woken up from my memories being taken away?" you chuckled a little.
"no, no, not at all. you were always really happy and upbeat, even on the darkest days. that's one of the reasons why i fell in love with you. you may not believe this, but, i'm kind of a debby-downer. you keep it light and fun, much like damon, actually. seems as though all that time you spent with him, as young as you were, you developed someone his behaviour."
"is that a bad thing? bonnie insinuated that damon isn't a good guy," you frowned.
"no, no. you're different. you pick and choose when to be a little um… eccentric. damon just says whatever comes out of his mouth, no matter what the situation is."
"i suppose that's another reason why you love me?" you grinned. "yes, you suppose right," he nodded.
"is this the boarding house?" you pointed to the mansion stefan was pulling in to.
"yes, it is. and, you can call it your home. that's what it is," stefan said.
"alright. it's beautiful." you admired the front.
"it's even better inside. especially our bedroom. you really know how to decorate." he got out of the car, opening the door for you.
"you're very chivalrous. i like it," you giggled. "well, anything for my girl," he flashed a warm smile.
your stomach flipped suddenly, a similar feeling to your heart hammering in your chest awakened. if your heart was still alive, then you it would be palpitating and ramming into your ribcage. you smiled back at him, getting out of the car.
you two walked together to the front, stefan opening the door without unlocking it.
"do we always keep the door unlocked?" you asked. "yeah. you know, the only people we are really worried about are vampires and well, you can't get in unless you invite them in," he answered.
"oh, right. well, that's nice. we don't have to worry so much about security," you said as you stepped inside.
he nodded in agreement, closing the door behind him once you two went inside.
"wow. you're right, it is better inside," you gasped. "mmhm. so, let me show you around. this is the grand study. it was mostly used by our nephew zach, but damon killed him as soon as he got here," stefan sighed.
"o-oh. and damon is supposed to be my best friend?"
"he's better than that, don't worry. you'll see, you'll remember," stefan patted your back.
"alright," you nodded. "anyways, right here is the library's and just out here is the grand hall. here is the dining room and the living room. back there is the kitchen, and next to it is the hearth room." stefan walked you around the house.
"it's amazing. wow, and to think this is my home," you laughed. "yep, all yours," stefan smiled as he heard your laugh.
he admired you as you walked through the living room, feeling around the bookshelves and the furniture. he missed this, seeing you back at home. before you woke up in the hospital, you had been kidnapped and tortured for two weeks before the travelers dumped you in the backyard of your house. after that, stefan rushed you to the hospital and about a day later you were awake. and now here you were, making yourself at home again. you looked so pretty in the setting sunlight. stefan almost wanted to cry at the relief of finally having you home.
"show me the upstairs?" your voice pulled him out of his thoughts.
"yeah, yeah, of course," he nodded. he reached his hand out to you, you taking it graciously.
you both smiled at each other, stefan leading you up the stairs.
"so, up here is damon's room. that's where elena, his girlfriend, and him usually are. they have so much sex, you won't be able to get much rest here," stefan snorted.
"i'll make sure to wear my earplugs," you giggled.
stefan smiled at you, walking you to the next rooms. "these are the baths. and right here is our room. every other room up here is a guest room, but uh, this is the main event, i suppose." he opened the bedroom door, letting you peer inside of it.
he was right, you were a great decorator.
the room had green walls, bookshelves on the walls, and a few plants here and there. there was a big bed in the middle with gray sheets, pictures of the two of you hanging above the bed frame. there was a desk and chair in the middle of the room, books and papers strewn all over the desk top. there were picture of you two all over the walls, making you smile whilst also crying.
"what's wrong?" stefan rushed to you.
"oh, it's nothing. i just…" you sighed, turning to him. "these pictures are so lovely. i-i wish i could remember these events."
stefan took your hand in his, giving you a small smile. "don't worry about it. it's not your fault that you can remember.”
"right," you nodded, still disappointed in yourself.
"why don't we go and walk around town? maybe that'll help get your memories back," stefan suggested.
"that sounds fun, but i don't think walking around will reverse dark magic," you joked.
stefan chuckled, nodding in agreement. "you're right, but, you're starting to remember your own childhood. we don't know what the travelers took from you, so maybe they didn't take the memories of you and i. you might just have amnesia."
"i'd love to do anything to try and remember," you said. "me, too. before we go, do you want to change clothes? you've had these clothes on for two weeks," stefan gestured to your ripped shirt and dirty jeans.
"oh, yes. i didn't even realise i was wearing these." you looked down at your legs, eyes widening at the fact you were wearing pants. "when did they invent these?"
"1873, but women still couldn't wear them until the 19th century. and even then, women didn't wear them as regular clothing until the mid-20th century," he explained.
“well, i’m glad that i’ve stayed alive this long to be able to wear these. what are they called again?” you asked.
“jeans,” stefan answered. he walked over to your closet, opening it and presenting all your clothes. “and you have lots of jeans. so, go ahead and get changed into whatever. if you want to shower then go ahead, the bathroom is to the right.”
you nodded, “thank you. i’ll be done in a few minutes.”
“no problem. take your time,” he smiled.
you returned the expression, watching him as he left the room, shutting the door behind him.
you went to your closet, running your hands over your clothes. you had lots of grey, purple, and blue shirts. you saw lots of ripped jeans, some were their regular blue and others were white or black. you chose a light purple, short- sleeved shirt and a pair of dark-wash jeans. you found a pair of black panties and a black bra to match.
you went into the bathroom, turning the shower on and undressing. you put your dirty clothes in a near pile on the floor as you didn’t know where the hamper was. you set your clean clothes onto the bathroom sink, jumping into the shower.
the hot water felt so good, it was hard to get out, but you didn’t want to keep stefan waiting too long. you dried off quickly, looking at yourself in the mirror after you got dressed. you didn’t realize, but you were very dirty and tired-looking before showering. you looked better now. more awake, clean, and pretty.
you didn’t bother putting on makeup, not even knowing where you kept it. you went downstairs, finding stefan in the living room reading a book.
“i am ready,” you announced.
stefan looked up, jaw dropping as he looked over you.
“you look gorgeous,” he spoke.
you smiled shyly, lowering your head in bashfulness. “thank you. it’s not much, just a comfortable outfit.”
“doesn’t matter. you look amazing,” he shrugged.
“thank you, again.”
“of course,” he smiled. “let’s go ahead and go, yeah?”
you nodded, slipping on your shoes as you followed him out to the garage. you got into stefan’s car, driving back to town square.
“a lot of places have been built or torn down. i’m going to take you to the places we used to go to in this century, then go to the places from long ago that have been torn down,” he explained.
“sounds good,” you nodded.
he parked next to the strip mall, getting out and opening the door for you.
“are men still as chivalrous as you?” you jumped out of the car.
“no, not at all, but i like to be known as a gentleman. it sets a good first impression,” he answered.
“that’s sad,” you frowned. “it is. honestly, most guys nowadays are jerks and are selfish. no one teaches kindness anymore,” he sighed.
“well, i’m thankful i chose a man who still cares about those things. it really reflects on what kind of man you are.”
“i agree,” stefan nodded.
you two walked onto the side walk, stefan lacing your fingers together and guiding you into a store.
“this is your favorite store in the whole
town square. you always rave about the good deals and i’ve bought you lots of jewelry here,” he explained.
you hummed in reply, looking over the store. “it’s quaint. i see how it would appeal to me.”
“yeah, this store is the most popular one here, i’m pretty sure.”
“the owner must be rich, then.”
“probably is,” stefan nodded.
he then led you out of the store, explaining all the other stores and restaurants in the town square before stopping and showing you a specific place you liked.
“this is the grill, the most popular restaurant here. you and caroline, who you have yet to meet, love to sing karaoke here. you and bonnie and elena, who again, you have yet to meet, play pool here and get tipsy on the weekend.”
“what is karaoke and pool?” you questioned.
“karaoke is when you pick a song you like, and you sing it with a friend, or sometimes yourself. a lot of bars have karaoke, and some restaurants do, like this one. it’s just a fun activity for drunk people, honestly. and pool
is this game over there. you see those people
shooting the balls with the sticks?” he pointed across the room.
you studied them, seeing as they would curse in disappeared, or jump and clap in happiness.
“yes, it looks fun.”
“it is, and you’re quite good at it. maybe tomorrow you can meet everyone else and i’ll teach you how to play,” he suggested.
“i would like that very much,” you smiled.
“me, too,” he smiled back. “are you hungry? we can take a break from walking and get something to eat.”
“my stomach does ache a little. what kind of food do they have here?”
“burgers, fries, salad. classic american stuff, basically. i can order what you usually do.”
“sure, but i’m afraid to tell you that i have no money,” you sighed.
“it’s not a problem. this is my treat. plus, we have a joint bank account so, it doesn’t really matter who pays.””
“wow, that’s nice.”
“it definitely is.”
stefan then led you to a small booth, ordering immediately once the waiter came.
“tell me more about yourself,” you prompted.
stefan stared at you, not expecting you to want to know about him. it wasn’t completely surprising, but you just seemed a lot more interested in the town than him. he was happy that you asked, though. it reassured him that you two had a chance, even if you two had to rebuilt your relationship.
“okay, well, my birthday is november 1st, 1846. my favorite color is blue, my favorite type of alcohol is bourbon, but i do like a glass of whiskey every once in a while. one of my best friends was lexi branson. she was also your friend, too, but damon killed her for absolutely no reason.”
“oh, my - i am so sorry, stefan,” you gasped. “oh, it’s alright. damon has uh, since proved himself to be better… unfortunately,” stefan sighed.
you put your hand on his, looking him in the eyes.
“it’s not alright, stefan. i know you say damon is a lot better than people say, and that he has proven himself better, but that doesn’t justify what he did. i’m so sorry you lost lexi. i understand what it is it like to lose someone so close to you. i’m sure you remember, but i lost christopher only a few years after we became vampires. i don’t remember all of it, but i do remember terrorizing a whole village because of the anger and depression i felt. i’m sure lexi was an amazing young woman. one day, i would love it if you told me more about her.”
stefan smiled at you gratefully, eyes prickling with tears. “thank you, y/n. it means a lot to me. and yes, i’d love to tell you about her.”
“fantastic.” you squeezed his hand for support, the gesture warming his chest. “anyways, go on,” you said, keeping your hand on his.
“alright. well, i love i love lucy, which is a ‘50s sitcom that, funnily enough, you hated,” he chuckled.
“what is a sitcom and why did i hate it?” your brows knitted together in confusion.
“well, a sitcom is a comedy tv show. and a tv show is content that is broadcasted onto something that is called a television, which was the big black screen in the living room of our house. sitcom is a type of tv show. there are sitcoms, dramas, romance, horror, and lots of others. a lot of these genres bleed together, much like books. and as for why you hated the show, you just thought it was annoying because i would watch it all the time.”
“well, i do have a short temperament, so that explains it, i suppose. that tv show thing is a little confusing. can you show me how it works when we get home?”
“yes, of course. i can show you your favorite tv shows and movies,” he nodded eagerly.
“lovely,” you smiled at his enthusiasm. “so, what else do you like?”
“well, i am a fan of scorcese, who is a famous tv director. he directed taxi driver, which is a film i am a fan of. i love to cook, and i’m quite good at it, if i do say so myself. um, let’s see… what else is there…” he trailed off, looking at the table as he thought. “i am a bit or a hoarder, as you probably could see in our room. i enjoy any and all types of music, i have a rose tattoo on my right shoulder, and i am a scorpio, if that means anything to do.”
he looked back up at you, the tips of his ears turning pink as he realized you were staring and smiling at him the whole time.
“why’re you looking at me like that?” he asked.
“it’s just nice hearing all these things about you. i can piece together who you are, who the man i am married to is. it’s obvious you don’t open up to people a lot, and i appreciate you doing that with me,” you explained.
“oh, well, it’s no problem. you’ll remember all these things, anyways. but this is just surface level stuff, nothing special.”
“i think it is special and important. now that i know you a little better, i’m able to talk to you more and be more comfortable.”
“mm, that’s true,” he nodded.
you gave him a small smile, your food then arriving.
“wow, this is a lot,” you chuckled, looking at the cheeseburger and fries.
“it’s really good, too,” stefan said.
“how do i eat this?” you asked. “pick it up in your hands and take a bite, like this.” stefan took a bite of his burger and fries.
you followed in suit, groaning in pleasure.
“my, they never had this food at home. this is delicious.”
“i know, right? so glad america stopped the wine and beef soup at dinner.”
you giggled, nodding in agreement. you two ate in silence, stefan paying before you two left.
“do you want to continue going around town, or are you tired?” stefan asked.
“i want to continue,” you stated.
“alright. time to go to all the torn down places now,” he sighed, walking you back to his car.
you two drove a little ways away from town square, finding yourselves at the cemetery.
“are anna, christoper, and my mother buried here?” you asked.
“yes, they are. do you want to see their graves?” stefan asked.
you sat in the car for a few moments, holding your seatbelt in thought. you shook your head as an answer.
“no, i would hate to put a damper on this lovely evening.”
“oh, well, it’s okay. you always manage to make things bright and happy, even when we’re visiting the cemetery, but if you really don’t want to, then i’ll take you to the salvatore estate, and where your house was located.”
“mm, i am sure. we can visit some other time,” you smiled.
he returned the expression. “alright.” he got out, going to open the door for you, but you had already jumped out.
“sorry, i um, wanted to see how the door works,” you admitted sheepishly.
stefan grinned, finding your curiosity adorable. “no worries. ready to go?”
“indeed i am,” you nodded.
you took the initiative and laced your fingers with his. stefan glanced at you, his chest swelling with joy. it was almost like old times.
“so, where is the salvatore estate?” you asked.
“it’s just a mile into the woods. there’s only a singular pillar there because it got torn down, but the pillar marks the spot where the house stood.”
“why did it get torn down? it was such a beautiful home. surely someone from these days would want to live in it,” you frowned.
“you’d think that, but i guess folks these days want something more modern. but, wait, do you remember my house?” hope filled his eyes, carrying all the way through his voice.
“i think i do. it seems… familiar in my mind. i remember the front of the house, the beautiful entrance and the pretty rose bushes, the steps that led up to the door. i remember a room… it was of medium size. there was a big bed in the middle, a deep-sea blue carpet under it. there was a bug mirror across from the bed, a painting or two hung up on the walls. there was a small desk in the corner next to the closet. the room is very empty, but it brings back feelings of warmth and calmness.”
“yeah, that was my room. you spent most of your summer’s in there with me.”
“oh,” your eyes lit up. “you said that we didn’t officially get together until after we were vampires, but i remember being in the bed in lots of white, button-up shirts. did we-?” you looked to him, eyes wide and hoping he would say yes.
his cheeks were tainted pink as he nodded. “yes, we had lots of fun nights, but not all of them consisted of sex.”
“i see,” you nodded, a little smile on your face. “what else did we do besides sleep together, then?”
“well, most times we just laid there in each other’s arms. sometimes i would read to you and you would fall asleep in my arms. other times we danced, sang, talked about the future together. and let me tell you, we definitely did not imagine an eternity together, but i’m really glad it turned out that way. despite all the pain we suffered.”
your chest warmed as you imagine you two in the 1800s, doing more and being more than just friends with intimate relations.
“does damon know of this?” you questioned.
“he does, but no one else doesn’t. to make things easier, we just told everyone that we started dating after we became vampires, and that we got married in 1963, which we did.”
“and how was the wedding?” you asked.
“the best night of my life,” he grinned. “we have lots of pictures of that night in the living room and our room, which i will show you when we get back.”
“i can’t wait,” you smiled giddily.
you squeezed stefan’s hand, the gesture making both of your body’s shiver.
“here it is,” he said, taking you closer to the singular pillar.
you let go of his hand slowly, walking around the property. you closed your eyes, feeling the cool breeze fan your face. you stood in the middle, right where the living room be. lots of memories then flooded back to you, making you snap your eyes open.
“your father didn’t like us together,” you stated.
stefan furrowed his brows. “yes, how-how do you know that?”
you didn’t answer him, continuing to reminisce.
“i was meant to wed damon, yet, i fell in love with you. your mother would let us play together, knowing that the fate your father decided wasn’t going to happen. she accepted us. she actually liked us better together than damon and i. she thought damon was too wild, too untamed to settle down so young. he was like her, in that way. but you, once you saw me at our first ball at age 14, you knew i was the one. i remember you telling me this one night on my sixteenth birthday. you had taken me up to your room, sneaking up extra cake for me, and we laid together on your bed. that was both of our first time that night - it was amazing. you told me before we went to bed about your growing feelings for me. that night we both said ‘i love you’ for the first time.”
stefan stared at you, mouth agape and tears welling in his eyes.
“you-you really remember that?”
“i do,” you smiled slowly at him. “i remember the marks you left on my skin, the joy i felt as you held my hand, the way i cried when you told me that you loved me. i-i’m afraid that this is all i remember, but -“
“no, no, it’s enough. it’s more than enough,” he sniffled, coming closer to you. he slipped his hand into yours, his other hand wrapping around your waist.
you smiled, putting your free hand on his cheek, rubbing your thumb up and down on his cheekbones. you looked into his eyes, studying his face as your hand went up and ran itself through his hair. you brought your hand back down to cup his cheek, your fingers dancing along his jawline.
“i also remember skipping school, playing football in the backyard, me wearing your shirt for the first time and it leading to us sleeping together again,” you giggled.
“how do you remember all of this?” he asked.
“the travelers must’ve just took all the important information about us, which we can deal with later. i want to enjoy this moment now,” you breathed out.
“thank god that they took that important stuff. it’s not that important once you think about it,” he nodded.
“i agree. i bet damon wouldn’t agree about that, though,” you joked.
“well, damon has never been madly in love until the last couple of years. but, me? i’m been in love with you forever.”
your lips spread widely and you looked deeply into his eyes, feeling yourself falling for him again.
“i love you,” you exhaled. stefan grinned, “i love you more.”
“nu-uh,” you shook your head. “mmhm,” he smirked.
you moved in closer, your nose bumping his softly. your eyes flickered down from his eyes to his lips multiple times before closing the gap. your lips met his in slow motion, immediately moving with his. his lips were soft and kissed you well, like he had done this a million times before, and couldn’t wait to do it again. he held you close against him, breathing in deeply at the taste of your lips. he felt at peace once again, whole and complete. and as for you, you felt alive.
every atom in your body was humming in pleasure. the feeling of his hands in your body, fitting right in with your curves, were like finally finishing a puzzle. it gave you butterflies, the way he tasted and smelled. the way he kissed you was delicious. it was gentle, but passionate. his lips worked against yours quickly, his tongue sliding against yours, eliciting a small moan from your throat. your teeth bumped each other gently, causing the kiss to then become fast, needy, hot.
you pulled away before anything else could commence, your chest heaving up and down. a line of spit broke off from your lips, breaking off as the breeze ran through it.
“remember anything else now?” stefan breathed out.
“just how much i’ve missed you,” you stated.
“i’ve missed you, too, baby. wanna go and see where old home was now?”
“yes, i’d love that,” you nodded. “great. come and follow me, then we can go home and i’ll make you your favorite meal, okay?” he suggested.
“that sounds amazing.”
“i’m so glad to have you back, y/n,” he squeezed your hand.
“i’m glad to be back.”
————
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adorethedistance · 4 years
Text
A Pretty Good Bad Idea - Owen Joyner x Reader
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JATP masterlist
Warnings: swearing, peer pressure kinda, very mild n fluffy
Words: 1865
Summary: Touring with the Julie and The Phantoms cast as a dancer has been the best time of your life, and the only thing that could make it better is the reciprocated affections of a cute, blond drummer.
A/N: So this piece is 1) inspired by this interview and 2) entirely self indulgent. It’s something I haven’t been able to get out of my mind every time I’m doing warm ups, and putting it down on ,, digital paper is my only way to get rid of it lmao. I hope y’all enjoy bc I know this scenario makes me really happy and I love sharing my joy with y’all.
I let out an involuntary whine when I roll forward into my almost-center splits. My hips are so sore from yesterday’s performance I had to force myself to start stretching in the first place. Getting a head start, I arrived at the concert venue an hour earlier than call time to get my lengthy stretching routine out of the way before the other girls show up. Slowly but surely, the rest of the dancers arrived and we began getting ready together.
“I have a speaker!” Tori announces to the room upon entering which makes me jump up from my seat.
“Yes! May I do the honors and bless y’all with my musical theatre playlist?” The rest of the group cheers, exposing themselves for the theatre kids that we are. After hearing the chime that signifies the speaker-phone pairing, a few seconds pass before “Cell Block Tango” begins to play. The entire group feigns outrage but we know all the words and soon indulge in such shameful pandering. A good pre-show playlist is what really gets me amped up for performing and after yesterday’s queue of ‘today’s hits’ pop, the musical theatre is a nice change of pace.
Since I’d gotten here so early, I decided to do my makeup before stretching and I still had time to spare. The only thing left for me to do was to get in costume but I’d wait until a little closer to showtime so that I could still eat and drink for the time being. This also meant I was free to roam and bother other people as they got ready, doing what I’d done almost an hour ago.
“So, Y/n?”
“Hm?”
“What’s going on with you and Owen?” I feel my breathing halt for a microsecond before looking up at, one of the other dancers and also my friend, Ella. My eyebrows are cinched in confusion as I try my best to figure out what it is she’s getting at.
“I don’t know, Ella. What is going on with me and Owen?”
“Oh come on. Your Instagram story from yesterday?” Oh. That.
“We just went to lunch?” I seemingly ask more than state.
“Yeah. Just the two of you. Don’t hold out on us, we wanna know what’s going on!”
“Really, Ella, there’s nothing going on. We’re just getting to know each other better.”
“Just getting to know each other better? Or getting to know each other better?” Tori butts in, dusting her cheeks with a subtle highlight.
“The first one?”
“How many times have you hung out?”
“Just the once.”
“Are you planning another date?”
“It wasn’t a date-”
“Do you want us to help wingman you?”
“I really don’t-”
“Hey.” The rapid-fire of questions cease when the gang of us look up to see Owen himself standing in the doorway.
“Speak of the devil,” Tori snickers as the rest of the girls slowly disperse and smugly resume doing their makeup. Owen makes a face in reaction to her comment but chooses not to pry.
“Could I borrow some hairspray? This one piece of hair won’t stay.” Despite each of the girls having a full can of hairspray on hand, nobody makes a move to give him the product, indicating that I should be the one to help him out. Rolling my eyes at the look Ella is giving me through the mirror, I stand from my chair and hand Owen the can of hairspray. He then looks straight ahead and moves to use the product but I stop him before he can.
“What’s your plan?”
“What?”
“Are you just gonna spray the piece?”
“...yeah?”
“That’s not gonna work since the rest of your hair already has product in it. Can I help you?” Owen nods amiably and takes a seat after I gesture for him to sit in my chair. I then realize my mistake as I need the comb on the grey countertop, and have to consequently reach past Owen in a way that wouldn’t be so compromising had I not worn such a low-cut top. Thankfully it’s over as fast as it began, and walking to the sink in the corner of the dressing room, I run the cool water over the bristles. It isn’t until I turn off the tap that I notice how eerily quiet the room had gotten. None of the girls are talking, attentively studying my every move as I cross back to Owen.
“Is this Chicago?”
“Uh, yeah, We’re listening to my musical theatre playlist though, not the whole soundtrack,” I respond in spite of the nervous laugh that falls from my lips. The slight slouch in Owen’s posture doesn’t help me to see what I’m doing clearly enough. Using my index finger and an upturned palm, I tilt his chin up to get a better look at his hair, willfully ignoring the fact that he’s staring at me right now.
Still, silence fills the room as I take the wet comb through the front section of his hair where the stubborn strand won’t stay put. Once the water binds the pieces together, I grab my can of hairspray and struggle to uncap it. The outside is slick from god knows what, but thankfully Owen doesn’t let me struggle anymore and holds up his hands to wordlessly offer his help. I hand him the can, and he pops the top off after barely struggling. Handing the can back to me, he holds onto the lid, and the entire exchange remains completely silent.
I have to work quickly in my next step, but it’s not enough to distract from the fact that everyone in the room is watching me intently. Holding the aerosol can away from the crowd of people, I put some of the product on the comb and quickly work it into Owen’s hair while it’s still wet. Once the comb has formed his hair to my liking, I stop brushing it through in fear of the now dry hairspray ruining the shape. Then, I use my left hand to shield Owen’s eyes from getting any product in them before spraying the offending area to seal in my hard work.
The sound of a cell door sliding closed signifies the end of the song, and I wait for a second, eagerly anticipating the next song to play. Upon hearing the staccato piano notes of “Bad Idea” from Waitress, a smile appears on my face.
“I love this song.” Lunging back on my right leg, I create a little distance between us to make sure I didn’t completely butcher the rest of his hair, singing as I do.
“It’s a bad idea, me and you.”
“I know, I totally agree.” Pleasantly surprised by his joining in, my smile grows bigger.
“It’s a bad idea, me and you.”
“I’ve never known anything so true-”
“It’s a terrible idea, me and you.” The effortlessness that the two of us find in harmonizing is a genuine shock and an absolute thrill all at once. Once Owen sees how excited I am by his joining in me, it’s like a switch had been flipped; the two of us immediately slip into Actor Mode and begin to sing the song as if we were performing it on a Broadway stage.
“You have a wife.” I take a small step back out of the character’s hesitation.
“You have a husband.” Owen mirrors my action.
“You’re my doctor-” I cross my arms across my chest, but release my right hand to gesture to Owen standing in front of me.
“You’ve got a baby coming-” He uses both hands to gesture back to me in my ‘pregnant’ state.
“It’s a bad idea, me and you,” the two of us turn slightly away from facing one another in false bashfulness. When the music picks up, the two of us avidly step toward one another to come together. In perfect synchronization, I grab Owen’s forearms and his hands face upwards to hold onto my elbows.
“Let’s just keep kissing ‘til we come to.”
“Heart, stop racing, let’s face it-” Owen pivots his step out to the side to face forward, extending his right arm which cues me to turn into him and take his other hand to spin out.
“Making mistakes like this will make worse what is already pretty bad.” Then he extends his right arm forward, and I turn into him once again.
“Mind, stop running. It’s time we just let this thing go.” Instead of spinning out again, I stop in front of him where he wraps both of his arms around me.
“It was a pretty good bad idea,” in our harmony I cast my gaze upward to see Owen staring right back down at me, and I feel like I’m seeing stars, “Wasn’t it though?”
The two of us continue dancing and singing with one another as if the rest of the world doesn’t exist. It’s only the two of us, here and now. The other girls in the room don’t miss the way I seem to smile like never before, and I sure as hell don’t miss the way my stomach fills with butterflies. When he holds me so close and dear for each intimate moment of the song, I’m seeing stars. A bold happiness consumes me, the same happiness I felt when Owen and I laughed over lunch in that small pizzeria.
The final harmony draws the song to a close and when it finishes, the two of us fall into a breathless kind of laughter.
“I didn’t take a big enough breath for that last part.”
“Me neither.”
“Your hair stayed intact.”
“I must have a pretty good stylist.”
After recovering from our laughter the two of us wind up in a palpable stupor as we stare into one another’s eyes. A few blinks and my trance is broken, I become aware of our surroundings.
“I should get dressed soon, and you definitely need to get dressed.” Owen nods still somewhat breathless.
“Yeah. See you later for pulse?”
“Save me a spot,” I joke as he backs out of the threshold of our dressing room. Leaning against the doorframe I watch him disappear into his assigned dressing room with a small smile still lingering on my features.
“Just getting to know each other my ass!”
“What the heck was that?”
“Are you sure you don’t want us to wingman you?”
“Do you even need a wingman after something like that?”
Turning on my heel, I face the bunch of insatiable dancers and shake my head in disbelief.
“We were just acting, you guys.”
“Liar.”
“Excuse me?”
“Maybe you were acting, but he sure as hell wasn’t. Did you see the way he was looking at you? He is totally in love with you.” Ella shakes me by my shoulders.
“He’s just a really good performer is all.”
“When is your next date?” she completely ignores me.
“Okay-”
“Oh, and I want to be the maid of honor at your wedding-”
“It was just a song, Ella.”
“-Oh my god you guys are gonna have the cutest kids! I mean, your hair with his eyes and cheekbones? Ahh! The cutest.”
***
A/n: the way that being on tour isn’t the most unrealistic part of this fic, but instead Owen actually knowing the lyrics is? Work diva.
Taglist: @caitsymichelle13​ @kaitlyn2907​ @itz-jas​ @crybabyddl​ @kcd15​ @kinda-really-lost​ @calamitykaty​ @morganayenneferburnham​ @n0wornever​ @dream-a-little-bigger-x​ @mrstodorooki @vicesvsvirturesfanfic @curlybrownhairedboys​ @amazinggracy​ @kaitieskidmore1​ @asdfghjkl-fanfics​ @ghostlygreenbean​ @juliefromaustralia @merceret​ @jemimah-b99​ @ifilwtmfc​ @thesweetestsinner​ @imsydneywalker​ @lovesanimals​ @thebloodthirstyvampress​ @bumbleberry-pie​ @losers-club6​ @tefilovesreading​ @dmcfarland1​@joynerxmercer @kexrtiz​ @talk-on-the-street​ @phantompogues​ @konciousdreamer​ @sunsetcurvej​ @warmnesss0ul​ @celestialmolina​ @lilyjoyner​ 
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mynameisnowwyrm · 4 years
Text
Spoiler warning
TL;DR horrible adaptation, but very enjoyable on it’s own
(Also just wanted to say I was so sure I was going to hate this bc of what’s different but they changed so much the cartoon and the live action are barely connected in my head)
Okay my review will be split up into two parts: fate: the winx saga as an adaptation and as a standalone work
As an adaptation:
0/10. Maybe 0.5 if I’m being generous.
The things that were unchanged from winx club:
There are characters named Bloom, Stella, Musa, Aisha, Sky and Riven
Aisha, Bloom, Stella and Sky resemble their cartoon counterparts
Riven is an asshole
Bloom is a dumbass
Magic exists
The specialists exist
Main characters go to schools for magic and specialists respectively
The dragon flame is a thing
Witches exist
Other than that it’s a completely different show. The plot vaguely resembles season 1 of winx club only in that Bloom is trying to discover her true heritage. Musa, who is supposed to of East Asian descent is not, Flora was not included and in her place is a different character with similar powers, Tecna was excluded entirely ( I believe this was to distance the show from the futuristic elements of winx club and focus only on fantasy, which doesn’t make sense since they changed Musa’s powers ).
The magic system was changed. Fairies don’t on the regular transform since in the show the know-how to do so was lost, though Bloom does unlock the ability in the finale. Instead of each being a fairy of an individual concept, everyone’s powers ale element based, with Musa’s powers being changed to her being an empath. While this does feel more generic, it makes more sense from a world building perspective and I can see why they changed it.
The fashion is horrible. You will never be able to convince me teenagers dress like that. One of the reasons the original cartoon was enjoyable was all the colourful, fun clothing. The clothes feel dated and too mature for the characters, like I can see a twenty-something person in 2013 wear some of those outfits. It especially feels like a missed opportunity since 2000’s fashion is coming back into style.
The characterization of some of the characters compared to winx club was hit and miss. Riven was an ass and Bloom was impulsive and naive, which is accurate, but Stella, oh Stella was a disappointment. Stella was a jealous, manipulative bitch, which in context of her character backstory makes sense, but is so far from her original portrayal. Cartoon Stella was spoiled and at times self centered, but she was also genuinely kind, helpful and bubbly. To see her character take a 180 and become the all too familiar jealous ex archetype was upsetting.
Now, aaaaall that being said, I don’t believe we should judge this as an adaptation. They changed so much that it is quite literally a new story. So let’s see how it stands up on it’s own.
Summary, taken from the wiki
The series tells the story of Alfea, a fictional boarding school where teenagers study. The world inside this universe is not only magical and full of monsters, but it is also a world of real teenagers who do the most common things: make friends and enemies, go out and of course... fall in love. They are eager to find their place in this world. This universe is different from the one we have all known for a long time.
The attention is focused on a group of proud teens, also well-designed female characters. Sometimes they are heroines, sometimes weak girls. Sometimes they are friends, sometimes rivals. Of course, they are not perfect, but they are real. A group of girls who did not know each other until they are included in the same team inside a school that is strange to them. They will meet forces that are beyond their control and things they do not understand. But, throughout the series, they will find themselves, form an indestructible bond, and transform into powerful and strong girls, ready to change not only the supernatural world, but also ours.
Character summary:
Bloom is a newly discovered fairy from the human world who is attending Alfea college in the otherworld. There she meets her new roommates: chatty Terra, athletic Aisha, uptight Stella and stand-offish Musa. She also meets Sky, Stella’s ex, who is training as a specialist.Shortly before coming to Alfea, Bloom discovers she has magic powers by almost burning her house down and killing her parents. She is distraught over this and it is why she is eager to gain control of her powers.It is discovered that Bloom is a changeling, a barbaric practice where a fairy baby is exchanged with a human one. This leads Bloom on a quest to discover her true heritage.
Musa is an empath, she can feel the feelings of everyone around her. To shut them out and escape she listens to music through her headphones. This leads to her initially coming off as uncaring when Terra tries to get to know her better.
Terra is an earth fairy with a particular talent for making plants grow. She is very nice and chatty, eager to make friends, but not afraid to stand up for herself. She struggles with finding someone to like her and compares herself to “cool girl” Beatrix who has boys following after her.
Aisha is a water fairy who swims twice a day every day. She comes off a a good person who wants to make friends and do the right thing. She also tries to do everything in her power to protect her friends.
Stella is a light fairy and princess of Solaria, the realm in which Alfea resides. She is repeating her first year due to an event prior to season one where she lost control of her powers and blinded her best friend. She is very uptight due to her perfectionist mother and tries to exert control in every other area of her life, when this doesn’t work, e.g. when someone flirts with her on-again-off-again boyfriend she gets jealous and causes trouble. She is also generally rude to the people around her.
Sky is a specialist legacy and Stella’s on-again-off-again boyfriend who has an interest in Bloom. His father was a famous specialist and he was raised by his father’s best friend.
Riven is Sky’s roommate, best friend and a genuine asshole. He insults and antagonizes everyone around him and gets involved with Beatrix. He seems dissatisfied with the life of a specialist.
Beatrix is an air fairy with a lightning powers. She seems mysterious and looks to be the villain of the season. She has enlisted the help of Riven and Dane.
Dane is a first year specialist who first seems to be friendly with Terra but gets sidetracked after spending time with Riven and Beatrix.
What I didn’t like:
The world building is sparse and the magic system is generic. I feel like things could have been better expanded upon. Throughout the show they bring up archaic fairy magic but it’s never really explained how that’s different from current fairy magic.
The interactions between Riven and Dane come off as a bit queerbait-y although they could be setting things up for a second season.
Everyone is constantly so rude towards Terra. Even her supposed friends are mean to her. What gives?
Stella was constantly rude to everyone but by the end they are all the best of friends when she really hasn’t changed much. Also Stella being the jealous controlling ex archetype and not enough people calling her out on her bullshit.
What I did like:
For a Netflix teen drama there is surprisingly little sex between the teenagers. This might be subjective but it was refreshing for me.
Again subjective but I could definitely relate to Bloom’s antisocial teen flashbacks
Beatrix was a fun villain
Though the story might be a little generic, I felt it was compelling throughout. I genuinely wanted to know what happened next.
The story was well paced. It never felt like anything was dragging along
Overall:
The show was definitely enjoyable to watch. There is a lot of room for improvement. It sometimes felt like different plot lines were unconnected and the costume choices leave a lot to be desired. Aside from that they set up a solid story and likable characters (some of whom I love love and love to hate) which I very much want to see further developed in the future. As a stand-alone work 6/10
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corpsedaydream · 4 years
Text
not such a merry christmas
corpse husband x reader
-
hi hi so it’s 4:20am lmao i’m not kidding
so i know i said i wasn’t going to be on over christmas but christmas wrapped up late for me and i wasn’t ready to sleep and i just started writing and this is what came of it. i know that christmas isn’t always exactly a happy time for everyone bc family and holidays can be complicated sometimes. so if ur struggling or experiencing anything negative or just not rly enjoying christmas. this ones for u friend and i’m sending love ur way
word count: 2085
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You had mixed feelings about this time of year.
The holidays.
On one hand, it meant you had some free time to enjoy some quality time with your nearest and dearest. And on another hand, it meant that you would be potentially finding yourself in situations where you would be spending time with family members who you would maybe rather not spend time with.
When you were young, Christmas always felt so magical. Now you were older, Christmas felt more like an anxiety inducing chore.
You’d talked to Corpse about your family a many of times, because for the most part, you really did love your family so much. You felt lucky to have been born into the family you were - again, for the most part. There was one particular sibling who you wouldn’t include in those feelings. Unfortunately, toxic people existed and extra unfortunately, sometimes those people were related to you. After four months of being with Corpse, he thought he had come to learn all of who were apart of your family. But then you were reminiscing on a childhood memory and when sharing it with your boyfriend, he heard a name he hadn’t heard before. When he questioned you on it, he noticed the immediate change in you. The smile left your face and you went timid and very quickly, you shifted the conversation topic. You were acting in a way he had never seen you be like before, usually you were so open and talkative and here was a brother you had never mentioned and definitely didn’t want to talk about.
He didn’t push it any further that day, figuring you would tell him when you were ready. That time came in November, on the 25th.
You remembered it well, Corpse was going through his emails when he asked you, “Baby, what’s the date?”
“November twenty-fi-” You cut yourself off.
“What?”
You were silent for a moment, you didn’t realise that Christmas had snuck up this quickly. It was only a month away.
“Baby?”
“Sorry- um,” you glanced to him, giving him a meek smile before continuing,  “it’s November 25th.”
He noticed that shift in you again. “Are you okay?”
And on that day, you opened up to him. Told him about the terrible memories that haunted days that should have and could have been really happy days had it not been for a bullying, negative family member. How now, you seemed to dread Christmas because of this fact.
“Why don’t you just not go?” Corpse had questioned you, he said it as if it was the most clear outcome, but it wasn’t like for you. It was so much easier for him to say that then it was for you to do.
“I couldn’t do that to the rest of my family.”
“Why? You can see them on any other day?”
“It’s Christmas, I couldn’t not go.”
“It’s just the same as any other day if you think about it.” As much as he had cared and listened to you opening up to him, it was hard for him to understand you on this. You grew up in vastly different family dynamics.
“Not to my family, it’s important.”
The two of you continued to go back and forth for a little bit before you realised the stubbornness you both shared wasn’t going to allow you to take in the other’s perspective.
In fact, the two of you didn’t speak about it again until two days before Christmas Eve. You were spending the day together because you were planning on leaving that night to stay at your parents house until boxing day. And as your leaving time was drawing closer and closer, it was visibly clear to Corpse how anxious you were feeling about it.
-
“(Y/N),” he had called for you attention and you looked to him, “I really don’t want you to go.”
A soft smile was offered to him. “I’m going.”
“But I can fucking see how this is affecting you. You’re dreading it, please don’t go.”
You sighed before answering him. “I have to go.”
“No you don’t.”
“I do.”
“Why?”
“Please, Corpse, I don’t want to go over this again. I’m already feeling nervous about it.”
“Then stay with me for Christmas, you won’t have to feel nervous about anything, we can just be here having our own good time.”
You knew he was just trying to be there for you, but it seemed this was not something the two of you could find a common ground on. “It’s not that simple.”
-
But if only it had been that simple. If only you had listened to Corpse. Because you wouldn’t be where you were right now. Sitting in your car with tears running down your face. It was 5:05pm in the afternoon on Christmas Day and you’d made a dash out the front door while everyone else sat down to eat dinner. You had tried your best to stay strong, to ignore your toxic brother but when someone was constantly saying and doing things to try to bring you down, you’d broken. You wished you could pull it together, so you could go back inside for the people you wanted to be with, but you truly couldn’t take it any longer. You would call and apologise to your Mother tomorrow, you felt bad for leaving her the most.
You shouldn’t have been driving in the state you were in, tears kept blurring your vision and your mind was so distracted you knew you really weren’t paying enough attention. But by some miracle, you had made it to where you wanted to be. And in one piece and it wasn’t your own place. You were parked out the front of Corpse’s place and how you just longed to be in his arms right now.
Heavy feet carried you to his front door and before you could get the chance to knock, Corpse had already swung the door open.
“Thought I saw your car pull up- oh, fuck,” His tone was happy at first, surprised with happiness that you were there until he took notice of the state you were in. Your foundation was streaked by the thick and fast tears that had fallen down your cheeks. Your mascara and eyeliner tracked black lines, too. Your nose had the makeup removed from it and it was displaying red due to the amount of times you’d rubbed at it. And oddly enough, a Santa Hat was still sitting atop your head. Corpse had never seen a more gloomy Christmas Hat appearance. “Baby, c’mere.”
He wouldn’t hesitate to stretch out his arms to pull you in close and you so gladly accepted. When you were resting against him, his arms would be holding you so tight and yours clutching at his hoodie he was wearing, he’d kick his foot out to shut the front door once the two of you were inside. Small sobs were already leaving your body, but feeling the familiar and protective grip of Corpse really just made you break more. You were safe here, you were safe with him, you could get out any emotion you needed to, and so you did.
Sobs wracked your entire frame, it was loud, vocal and physical crying. Corpse had seen you cry before, but never like this. It was hurting him to see you so hurt. He was so concerned for you, he didn’t have to ask if you were okay, your display was making it clear you weren’t. When he could start to feel your feet starting to give out and your weight became heavier against him, and he not only heard but also felt you choking on your own cries and starting to really struggle to breathe, he felt the need to do more.
Gently, he’d bring you down to the floor with him. He’d sit with his back against the wall and grab your thighs to have you sit in his lap, your legs straddling him. He would pull you in tight enough so your chest and torso was completely against his, the two of you couldn’t be brought any closer if you tried.
“I need you to try taking some deep breaths for me.” He’d tell you right in your ear, needing you to hear him over your violent cries. And so you did, but each one was uneven and would catch in your throat and make you cough.
His hand would be rubbing big, deliberate, heavy circles into your back with a force to make its presence known, a tactic he hoped would calm you. He was caught off guard to see you like this, but after opening up to him about your toxic sibling and how anxious you had been to be around him again, he wasn’t exactly shocked. He was so concerned for you but a part of him was also furious that someone had treated you in such a terrible way to put you in this state. He now wished he had worked harder in getting you to stay with him, if you were with him, you were safe, he wouldn’t let harm - especially like this - come to you.
“I’m here.” Corpse would assure you with a longing kiss to the side of your head, rocking you back and forth.
And eventually, while sitting there, being cradled in his arms, your cries would quieten, your sobs wouldn’t make you shake so violently and your breathing would return to a more regular state.
“Feel better?” He’d ask you once you reached that more stable point and you’d nod your head from its place against his neck before doing a much needed yawn. “You’re tired?”
“Exhausted.” You’d confirm.
“Should we go lay down?” He was still holding you so strongly and securely but being so gentle with how he spoke to you.
“Yeah, I want to get some painkillers first, though, my head hurts.”
“Want to take off the Santa hat?”
“No.”
“What, why?” Your answer surprised him.
“I’ve had it on all day, I’ll have really bad hat hair.” You admitted and Corpse laughed and had you been in a better mood, you would have joined in on the laughter. But it did lift your spirits to even just simply hear him laugh.
“I’m sure it won’t be that bad.”
“It will be.”
Corpse laughed softly again and shook his head slightly and when he felt you relax against him again, he brought up his hand to quickly pull the hat from your head.
“Hey!” You lifted your head then and he was relieved to see no more build up of tears in your eyes anymore.
“You’ll feel better without it on.” He argued your protest, smiling a small smile and you couldn’t help but to mirror it, which made Corpse elated to see.
“Okay, but don’t you dare look at my hat hair.” You told him and because he knew your eyes were on his, he intentionally lifted his eyes to your hair. “Corpse!” You called his name with a laugh and he was so happy to hear you laugh instead of cry. “Stop it.” You spoke through more giggles and your hands came up to land on your head over your hair until Corpse grabbed your wrists and moved your hands out of the way. “Hey!” Squirming your arms to get your wrists out of his grasp. Once you freed them, you’d place your hands over his eyes.
“Baby, let me look at your beautiful hat hair.”
“No!” You both would laugh then and this time when your boyfriend took hold of your hands to move them off of his eyes, it would be soft and he’d lift them to bring back his vision and bring your hands down a little to place kisses into the palms on each of your hands.
“You know you don’t have to hide anything from me, right?” On the surface, it could’ve sounded like Corpse was talking about just the hat hair, but on a deeper level, he meant this so wholeheartedly, and you understood.
So you’d nod. “I know. Thank you.”
And Corpse knew that once again, when you were ready you’d tell him about what took place on that Christmas Day, but for right now, he didn’t need to know. All he needed to know is that now you were okay and you were safe and you were with him.
“I love you, (Y/N).”
“I love you, too.”
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rebeccccccaaa · 4 years
Text
ɢʀᴀᴛɪᴛᴜᴅᴇ
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ʙᴏᴅʏɢᴜᴀʀᴅ!sᴛᴇᴠᴇ ʀᴏɢᴇʀs x ᴍᴏʙʙᴏss!ʀᴇᴀᴅᴇʀ
ʀᴇǫᴜᴇsᴛᴇᴅ: Mob boss!Readers x bodyguard!Steve Rogers Some other gang leader doesn’t believe reader is the boss bc she’s a woman and he tries to manhandle her until Steve attacks him and then she thanks him with smut
ᴡᴀʀɴɪɴɢs: Smut 18+, major angst, but there’s fluff because I can’t help myself ;)
ᴛᴡ: sᴇxᴜᴀʟ ᴀssᴀᴜʟᴛ/ʜᴀʀᴀssᴍᴇɴᴛ, ᴅᴇᴘɪᴄᴛɪᴏɴs ᴏғ ɢʀᴀᴘʜɪᴄ ᴠɪᴏʟᴇɴᴄᴇ ᴀɴᴅ ᴅᴇᴀᴛʜ, ᴀɴᴅ ɢᴜɴ ᴜsᴇ
ᴀᴜᴛʜᴏʀ’s ɴᴏᴛᴇs: Ah! I’ve never written anything about mobs and shit I’m so excited!
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“I’ll be fine,” you cupped Steve’s face.
“I should go in there with you. You’ve never met this guy and the others said he was creepy,” Steve sighed resting his hand on your hip. Steve was essentially your bodyguard highly recommended by your father when you took over the mob. 
“Sit here and eat your muffin, read your newspaper and if anything happens I’ll shout,” you grinned. 
“Y/n,” Steve said sternly.
“Sit down,” you patted his shoulder. 
He eventually sat beside the door grabbing the newspaper before taking an aggressive bite of his muffin making you giggle. You fluffy his hair before entering the room for your meeting with another boss. Your father advised you to expand trading and you’ve never been one to be ‘social’ so it was something you put off for years now. But now it’s getting late so here you are talking to a creep that offered a trade with you.
“Hi, thank you for coming,” you said entering the conference room. 
“Why hello? Aren’t you a cute little thing,” the man snarled.
“Excuse me?” you quipped. 
“Well, had I known there’d be a little plaything for me while I wait I would’ve come by sooner,” he stood up towering over you.
“I’m sorry, you must be very mistaken, sir. We don’t degrade women here,” you smiled sarcastically.
“Haha, you’re funny. I do like women who can make me laugh,” he grabbed at your hips.
“Sir, you are incredibly mistaken. I am the leader of this mob and if you lay your disgustingly meaty hands on me one more time I won’t hesitate to put a bullet through your thick skull,” you growled. The man’s temper bursted and he aggressively grabbed your throat pulling you too close to his body. 
“Listen here you little brat, you’re gonna do what a woman was meant to do and if you don't get on your knees baby girl you’ll get what’s coming to ya.”
“Get off of me!” you shoved him back.
“Nu-uh pretty girl, you’re gonna suck my cock until the big man gets here whether you like it or not!”
Steve sat eating his muffin trying his best to ignore the muffled voices from inside the conference room. He couldn’t help but worry about your safety being with that creep. When the guy first arrived he groped one of the housekeepers and laughed as if he did nothing wrong. Steve sat there desperately hoping this meeting with that scumbag doesn’t go well and you'll drop him. He can’t even imagine working with a man like that, especially when you're a woman. 
Suddenly he heard a shriek emerge from the room and Steve bursted through the door. He pulled his gun out seeing the man bending you over your own desk pulling the hem of your pants. Steve aimed the gun and shot the man in the back of his knee making him fall to the ground groaning in pain. 
“Fuck,” you groaned running to Steve. He held you tightly in a panic and you breathed heavily against him. 
“Are you ok?” he asked. 
“I think so,” you swallowed loudly. 
“I’m gonna kill you,” you looked at the writhing man on your floor. 
“I’m sorry, fuck! I’m sorry!”
“Steve, get out,” you ordered.
“No, sweetheart I’m not leaving you alone again with this man,” he raised his voice.
“Steve, please,” you looked at him.
“Baby,” he sighed.
“Go!”
You looked back at the man still squirming on the floor in pure agony. You pulled a pack of cigarettes off your desk placing one between your chapped and bitten lips. You walked around the desk keeping your eye trained on the shithead. You grabbed your lighter and lit the cigarette before reaching inside one of your drawers and grabbing a gun. 
The silvery metal reflected the smallest light around your office as you approached him. 
Steve stood in the hallway with his hand resting on the handle of the door, biting his lip anxiously. His heart sank when he heard a gunshot and he bursted through the door finding you sitting with a cigarette between your lips and your gun in hand. 
“What the hel-” he found the man dead bleeding from his head. You stared at the body in disgust, blood spattered on your face and clothes. You dragged the poison and blew the smoke into the air. Steve slowly walked up to you cupped your face to look at him. 
“What happened?” he whispered. 
“I made sure he never does what he did to me to another woman ever again,” you said monotonously.
“Come here,” Steve picked you up and you tossed the cigarette on the dead man burning his bloodied face. 
Steve carried you to your room and sat you on your bed. You stayed still staring at nothing while Steve grabbed you a towel. He cleaned the blood of your face and tears fell down your face. You felt humiliated and violated. 
“Are you ok?” Steve whispered, afraid as if he spoke too loud he would startle you. 
“Yeah,” you choked out.
“No, you’re not.”
“Steve, I am. Truthfully. If you hadn’t been there, I can’t even imagine what would have happened,” you breathed out heavily calming yourself. 
“I owe you a great debt, Steve,” you said softly. 
“No you don’t, I’m just doing my job.”
“Thank you,” you leaned in closely and brushed your nose against his.
Suddenly Steve felt small. He was always a confident man, something you deeply admired about him, but being able to make him feel this way, all bothered and shy, gave you a sense of even more power over him. 
You brushed a hair from his face and moved to sit on his lap, your legs on either side of his thighs. You circled your hand down to his chin lifting it slightly to make him look at you with those gorgeous blue eyes; like sapphires.
“I see the way you look at me Steve,” you whispered.
“We can’t,” he said back.
“Why not? I know how bad you’ve wanted me,” you trailed your hand down his chest.
“Y/n, you’re vulnerable. I can’t take advantage of you like that,” he said. You have this desire to regain control after what happened and conquering Steve would do just that whether you admit it or not. He wants to so badly have his way with you but he knows he’s just a grievance. You’ll wake up the next morning and pretend this never happened, that the words he’d whisper to you are just that, words. The love he’d give you isn’t reciprocated. He can’t let you break him like that. 
“What’s going on?” you asked seeing him in a sort of mental battle.
“Nothing, you should rest,” he said.
“I don’t want to rest. I don’t want to be alone,” you told him.
He looked at you with soft eyes, clenching his jaw tight. His hands were resting on your hips and he desperately fought the urge to move them; under your shirt, over your cheeks or thighs, anywhere, he wanted to feel you so bad. 
“Steve,” you breathed out, practically moaning. 
“Fuck,” Steve said with frustration.
“Please,” you cupped his face.
When he did say anything you got off of him and slowly made your way to the bathroom. Steve sat there regretful breathing out a breath he didn’t realize he was holding. You were right there. In his arms and he pushed you away. 
You came out again wearing simple nightwear and trotted to Steve once again. You didn’t sit on his lap despite the both of you secretly wishing you would again but you did sit fairly close; your shoulder pressed against his. 
You rested your head on him, the both of your staring at the floor in silence. You slowly up at him cupping his bearded jaw with your delicate hand. You brushed the hairs with your fingers, you’d always preferred his beard than without. You had been the one to convince him not to shave and you had been the one he did it for. 
You couldn’t stop yourself and neither could Steve when the two of you met in the middle, your lips pressing against each other perfectly. Your eyes fluttered closed at the feeling and his hands went to where they belonged on your hips. You two kissed for what felt like an eternity; an eternity of pure lust and ecstasy. Steve pushed you down to lay flat on your bed, his hips settling between your legs. 
“Tell you want me, tell me how much you need me,” Steve said against your lips.
“I want you, I need you, so fucking bad,” you moaned.
“Tell me this is real,” he said with his eyes screwed shut. 
Steve had been so enamored by you since the day he met you. He used to work for your father before he retired and he insisted that Steve worked alongside you, to protect you. You were hesitant about having him around, independency clouding your mind when you became leader, but little did Steve know you had become very fond of the man at your side everywhere you went. 
He occupied every part of your mind for years now. The confidence he oozed, and sexiness he projected; how could anybody not fall in love? He was the source of the many nights you laid alone in bed, your hand between the junction of your thighs, writhing and panting dreaming of his body pressing against you just as he now. 
Steve fought his desires just as long as you did. When he looks at you, he can’t help the stutters and skips his heart makes. When you laugh, especially at something he says, he feels like a little boy again talking to his crush from school. You’re just so beautiful and dauntless, graceful and fearless. He can’t help but fall in love. Anyone would. 
“Steve, look at me, please.” 
Steve’s eyes pried open, terrified you would disappear if he did.
“This is real. I want you so badly; I need you. Please make me feel good,” you whispered against his lips. 
Steve kissed passionately before moving his lips across your jaw line, nipping and biting the soft skin. His hands held your waist firmly under your shirt, gently squeezing your sides making you giggle. 
“That tickles,” you giggled.
“The scary mob boss is ticklish?” Steve joked. 
“Stop it!” you shrieked when he tickled harder.
Steve laughed at you for a moment before capturing your lips in a kiss once again. He pulled up again sitting back on his knees bringing you with him up to his chest. He looked into your lust blown eyes carefully lifting your shirt. You eagerly raised your arms allowing him to discard it before you did the same to him.
You marveled at his toned body, your hands smoothing over his muscles and the little hairs that littered his chest. Steve's hands came up your side, his thumbs grazing lightly over your perked nipples making your body shiver with need. 
He sat comfortably bringing you to your knees so he was in line with your chest. He leaned forward and kissed all over before wrapping his lips around your nipple. His tongue swirled around it and his teeth grazed the nub before releasing with a pop and doing the same with the other.
The feeling of his tongue made you extremely aroused soaking your panties. You breathed heavily relishing in his attention. Your fingers combed through his hair lightly pulling on his long strands. He groaned softly, his eyes fluttering in pleasure. You’ll keep that in mind.
You sank down fully sitting in his lap, when you felt him poking you through both of your fabrics. You hand snaked down in between your bodies and you pressed on his erection with your hand, making him groan again. 
“Fuck, don’t tease me.”
“Then take these off.”
You quickly got off of his lap and he hurried to stand and take his pants off. You giggled at the sudden flurry of clothes but your face quickly turned to shock when you saw the size of Steve for the first time. 
“Baby, that’s not going to fit in me,” you said, making him chuckle.
“We’ll never know if we don’t try,” he winked. 
You bit your lip and laid back for him. He rubbed your legs softly curling his fingers over your bottoms and reluctantly pulled them down your legs. He kissed your legs up to your stomach before coming face to face with you once again. 
He kissed you with need like he would never be able to again after tonight. He doesn’t feel convinced that this is real. That tomorrow when you wake up beside you’ll realize that maybe you don’t fancy him like you say right now.
You reached forward wrapping your hand around his cock looking up at him with faux innocent eyes licking and biting your lips seductively. Steve could help but groan as he laid atop of you, hard as rock. 
Steve kissed your lips and he swears that he could stay like this forever. Your lips, although chapped and dry, were so addictive and obsessive. Your legs wrapped around his hips and your arms around his shoulders pulling him close to you as if he’d float away. He pushed slowly in you and you let out a shaky moan. Steve’s head that was buried lifted quickly, looked at you and whispered soft praises to you. 
“You’re doing so well, baby,” he whispered against your lips.
“Steve, move please,’ you moaned. 
He snapped his hips back and rutted into you over and over again. He placed his hand on your lower belly and felt his cock poking with each thrust. He grabbed your hand and placed it there too and you gasped at the fleeing before moaning loudly.
“Fuck, Steve,” you whimpered.  
“You’re so fucking beautiful, baby. God, you feel amazing. Pussy’s fucking perfect; you’re perfect,” he said against your ear. His words made your stomach flutter and your heart burst. He kissed the skin below it and your body shuddered at the feeling of his cool lips against your hot skin. Your hands raked through his long hair and you tugged on the locks bringing his head back up. You instantly attached your lips to his kissing him messily and passionately. 
Your pants and moans became louder with each thrust he got closer to making you release. You moaned his name over and over like a prayer. Steve grunted and his chest tightened feeling overwhelmed by you. 
His hips faltered and you pushed his shoulders rolling over with his cock still inside you. You quickly moved your hips back and forth, your hands pressing flat against his chest to support you, nails scratching his chest leaving dark red marks. Steve’s hands reached for your breasts, his thumbs grazing over your hardened nipples. His hands landed in their place on your hips guiding you, though you didn’t need it much.
“Fuck, baby. I’m gonna come,” he moaned.
“Come in me, fuck! Stevie, I want it all, give it to me,” you said staring at his lips. 
“Fuck!”
Steve snapped his hips up and you felt his hot cum coating your walls. The feeling overwhelmed you and you came in time with him. Your eyes rolled back, your back arched, and you felt incredible. This career, if you can call it that, has run into plenty of lousy men and you wasted many hours with them but this, you could bask in the feeling of Steve’s arms and fully be content with life. 
You fell forward and Steve wrapped his arms around you. You breathed heavily and Steve’s hand rubbed your head lovingly. Your eyelids felt heavy and you couldn’t help the tiredness that overcame you. Steve laid there carefully listening to your breathing even out. He couldn’t believe that you were actually laying, naked and beautifully, in his arms. He dreamed of this moment more than he liked to admit.
Hours later you felt yourself suddenly wake. You were in a cold sweat shaking uncontrollably. You got off Steve who was still sleeping soundly beneath you. His face was so angelic, no it was god like. He looked so at peace you felt awful disturbing his comfort when you crawled off him quietly.
You grabbed one of the thin sheets that had fallen to the floor and wrapped lazily around your body and walked to the large window of your room. You looked out the window before grabbing the pack of cigarettes and lighter sitting fixed on the window ledge waiting to be used during your lowest moments.
You felt vulnerable. 
Steve laid on your bed and you really appreciated him. You genuinely liked him and you know he probably doesn’t believe you yet. He was so charming and compassionate. He protected you especially after what happened today. 
What happened today. God, you can imagine what would happen, what you would do to get out of that awful situation but when it happens, when it becomes reality… you forget everything. You forget how to breathe, how to move. It was terrifying. Even after everything you’d seen being a boss. 
“Whatcha thinking about?” Steve came up behind you, wrapping his strong arms around you. 
“God! You fucking scared me,” you looked at him.
“Sorry,” he smirked. 
He leaned forward and placed kisses along your shoulder and neck. You dragged the cigarette, closing your eyes at the delicious feeling of Steve’s kisses. His hands grazed under the sheet, his fingertips tickling the skin of your belly.
“Stop it,” you warned.
“Oh right, the scary mob lady is ticklish. I’ll keep that in mind,” he whispered, his lips against your ear.
“I swear to god, Steve. I’ll fire you,” you chuckled.
“Are you feeling any better? If that’s possible,” he said after a moment.
“You’re here with me,” you told him. 
“Please don’t leave me,” you teared up. This was the first time Steve had ever seen you vulnerable, visibly upset, crying. He’s never seen you cry.
“I would never leave you; not unless you want me to,” he cupped your face. 
“Thank you.”
Steve took the cigarette from your fingers and brought it to his lips dragging smoke and blowing it out the open window. You smiled at him before kissing his lips softly. 
“Come back to bed; it’s cold,” he placed the cigarette in the ashtray. 
You closed the window and Steve picked you up taking you to bed. You cuddled by his side, pressing your cold body against his warm one. You buried your face into his neck and fell sound asleep. He made you feel safe and protected. You easily let your guard down when you were with him and after tonight you really felt your walls coming down for him. And Steve was more than willing to come in. 
 ===================
ᴛᴀɢʟɪsᴛ: (For all my work)
@mathletemadison​
@buckybarnes101​
@l-sofiamia-l 
161 notes · View notes
jungxk · 5 years
Text
crush
filed under. i totally forgot i wrote this. also i like the name eunmi sue me 
notes. thank you to @lonelyending for reading thru this crusty story and making me feel good enough about it again to post it. also @suga-kookiemonster bc im pretty sure i sent u this like a year ago and u told me to post it it but....i forgot abt it shdgjsgd. writing/life in general has been hard recently so pls accept this kookfic to hold yous over until i update just one
genre. fluff, light comedy, light angst, smut
warnings. smut (oral sex: f receiving, penetrative unprotected sex) 
length. 5.1k
the first thing jungkook thinks when he sees you is wow.
he hasn't been up for very long, and you don't even know he's looking at you through the window. yoongi-hyung has wrapped you up in his arms as you sob and sob, muted behind the protective hospital glass. even with messy hair and wet eyes he's starstruck. it's why he recoils slightly when jimin and namjoon explain to him that you're his wife.
"my," he can't even say the word. "my..."
"your wife," namjoon repeats. "you know what a wife is, right? marriage?"
"yes," jungkook huffs, digging his nails into his scalp. "i lost my memory, hyung, not my fucking brain cells." 
he suddenly registers the gold band glistening on his left hand, simple and heavy. he has to take a second to collect himself. "but...but i'm twenty-three. right? i am twenty-three, yeah?"
"yeah. you are," jimin says softly.
"then how the fuck am i already married? not that i'm complaining i just," he suddenly turns pink at the thought of you in a wedding dress, clinging onto his arm, breakfast dates, late night ramen runs at the convenience store, painting the living room in a house you probably share, naked in bed on top of him. jungkook clears his throat. "it just seems a little out of character for me. i can't commit to a pair of shoes for a week let alone-"
"i think it's best if you just spoke with ____," jimin finishes before jungkook can work himself into a frenzy, a comforting hand laying on his shoulder. "you two need to talk anyway and it's best if all these answers came from her."
jungkook gulps at the thought of speaking to you, seeing you face to face. suddenly he's a cripplingly shy fourteen year old again.
"okay." he croaks. "okay."
x
x
x
you were even more beautiful up close.
your tear stained cheeks are glowing and blotchy when you perch on the chair beside his bed, big eyes fluttering up at him nervously. you're soft and plush and shorter than he thought and jungkook has to fist his hands in the sheets and play a counting game with the heart rate monitor in order to maintain eye contact. he feels himself start to sweat when you smile sadly at him. "sorry, i just...i don't know how to be around you normally without making you uncomfortable," you say quietly, wringing your hands together to avoid touching him.
"uncomfortable?" he queries, gaze latching onto the ring on your hand. seeing it on you gives him a nice feeling.
you nod into your lap. "yeah, um..." you look at your scuffed shoes, searching for the word. "we're usually very...touchy."
he can feel himself turning red again. "t-touchy?"
you meet his eyes and a pretty smile breaks over your face at how bashful he looks, making jungkook's cheeks tinge even pinker than they already are. you nod cutely so your earrings tinkle, eyes shining, and suddenly he understands without any context why he fell in love with you, why he married you so young. you let a comfortable silence settle over the room before taking a deep breath, bracing yourself. "how much do you remember, jungkook?"
he tries not to cave under the weight of his guilt. "not a lot about...you, that is," he finishes with a wince, your sad eyes immediately making him wilt with shame. "i remember everything up until a couple of years ago. we had a show at the japanese dome, debuted in america, and then...nothing. and now..."
"and now," you echo softly. your eyes look distant, staring at the floor.
"i'm sorry," jungkook whispers, chin touching his chest. "hyung told me...they all told me how much i loved you and...and i'm sorry i don't remember any of it. i'm so sorry."
you shake your head gently. "don't be sorry, jungkook-ah," the pet name makes his ears perk up. its a familiar, calming sound. "none of this is your fault. you didn't ask to get hit by that car." your expression turns remorseful, tugging at his heart. "if anything, this is because of me. the only reason you were out was because i asked you to go and get eggs and formula even though i should've remembered to pick some up on the way home and-"
"no, no! please don't blame yourself," jungkook tries, wishing he was close enough or even brave enough to take your hand. you look up at him and he catches a glimpse of the endless pool of love you harbour for him, like a punch to the chest. "i don't ever want you thinking this was your fault. so ple-" he pauses. "wait, formula?"
the door bursts open before he can finish, pitter patter steps rounding his bed until it reaches the other side, where you sit. a little girl with big dark eyes and curls of dark hair stares at him in wonder and elation, her cheeks dimpling just like yours before she screeches, "appa!"
jungkook's mouth goes dry. appa?
you're quick to intervene, putting yourself in the toddlers path to scoop her up in your arms. her grabby little hands struggle over your shoulder, fingers wriggling in attempt to get as close to jungkook as possible. he only stares with wide eyes and an open mouth, heart hammering in his chest when he sees the uncanny resemblances: his round nose. your brown skin but just a twinge fairer. his hooded eyes. and his stomach lurches.
"shhh, eunmi," you coo as you carry her away even with her squirming. "remember what i said before? appa is sick. appa is sick, baby-"
"we have a child?" jungkook wheezes, eyes starting to glaze over. there's a bout of silence when you look back at him guiltily, the baby's fumbling grinding to a halt when she registers the tension in the air. jungkook's breath is barely a whisper. "is that my daughter?"
your face crumples with a fresh bout of tears and eunmi looks on worriedly. she pushes her little lips into your cheek in a baby's kiss, like she's seen her father do so many times to get your attention. the word "amma," is muffled into your skin until you get yourself together and press a short kiss to her head.
yoongi rushes in, face twisted in apology. "i swear to god i turned around for one minute and-"
"it's okay, yoongi," you say quietly, stroking the baby's head. "eunmi, stay with uncle just a bit longer, okay? amma will be back in a minute..."
"appa," she whines over your shoulder, reaching for jungkook who sits helplessly in his bed. he watches with tears wetting his eyelashes, heart twisting in agony at the sight of his child he doesn't remember stretching her arms out for him. she begins to cry when he doesn't react or coo her. like he used to.
"take her, yoongi," you say shakily, passing the baby to him. the sound of eunmi's crying makes your heart shatter all over again, yoongi's quiet hushing doing nothing to qualm her sobbing as the heavy door closes behind them.
the silence that falls between the two of you is nothing short of excruciating. jungkook's head spins, completely overwhelmed: is that why you both got married so young? because of a child? was this why jimin and namjoon wouldn't say a damn thing about his life until he spoke to you first?
and then all the other questions that followed: was he a good father? when was his daughter's birthday? did she like kimchi and banana milk too? did he sing to her? read to her often?
would she ever forgive him for not being able to remember her?
"her name is eunmi," you say, looking down at the floor when jungkook starts to cry.
x
x
x
jungkook doesn't understand how his baby could be so pretty. she's golden brown like those sandy beaches on postcards, with chubby cheeks and twinkling dark eyes that resemble yours to a t, and that's when he realises of course she's beautiful. she's yours. you balance eunmi on your hip while you make coffee - decaf, since you're still weaning - and despite the amnesia jungkook feels like he's been here before, in this warm, happy place that is the kitchen.
"she got your nose though," you remind him, dumping the baby in his lap upon her fussing. she always seemed to wind down under his touch, and although nervous about the sudden responsibility of fatherhood, jungkook is compelled to give it. eunmi doesn't understand anything's changed so he doesn't see why he should act like it. "she's whiny before her milk too. like you."
"hey!" he retorts, but can't exactly defend himself. he twirls his fingers around her curly pigtails until she catches on and tries to stand on his thighs, reaching for his hair to yank. jungkook lets her. he's barely known his daughter a week and he's already so smitten he'd let her gut him open with a butter knife.
"she missed you, you know. when you were in hospital all this time," you say, making him look up to watch you stare into your drink. the fear still lingers in your eyes, faint and persistent. he can see it every time you look at him and it makes his body yearn to touch you like he once did, like he once would have before his brain unlearned everything his heart didn't. you laugh while watching eunmi pull his hair again, making him hiss. "even yoongi tried but no one coddles her as much as you."
"really?" he asks, face lighting up. he's so happy to hear that. jungkook hates the way the question bubbles up in the back of his throat, like it'd make a difference or it'd change how he felt. but he has to ask it. "is that why...is that why we got married so early, then?" he says, trying to sound as offhand as possible. "because of eunmi?"
you chew your lip. "yeah. i mean, you said it wasn't a big deal. because you were going to marry me eventually so it didn't make a difference, but...it doesn't really matter i guess, because that's not what everyone else thinks," you pause, tracing the rim of your mug again. "that's certainly not what your fans think."
jungkook doesn't even want to think about it. the backlash, the gossip, the name calling and dehumanisation. for the first time in his life jungkook couldn't give less of a shit about his reputation. "i'm sorry," he says, feeling like the word has lost meaning by now with how much he's said it. "i'm so sorry. not for this, for us or for eunmi. i don't regret any of that i just," he shifts the baby in his lap, still getting used to her weight. "i can only imagine what you went through."
you look a bit bewildered. "...you said that last time too." you smile again reassuringly. "please don't feel solely responsible, kook-ah. you didn't exactly get me pregnant on your own."
he flushes tomato red and you giggle at him until eunmi joins in too.
x
x
x
jungkook can't keep his eyes off you while you play with the baby, comb out her hair, sing her lullabies while you bathe her together. he'd always wanted a whirlwind romance as a teen and it looks like he finally got it, because he can feel himself fall head first in love with you (all over again). it didn’t make sense for someone to be so collected and easygoing after having motherhood forced onto you so abruptly. you tell him often that he's a picture-perfect dad, but jungkook still doubts he compares.
"does she need a change?" he asks, struggling to keep all of eunmi's wriggling limbs in his grip.
"nope, just hungry," you say, reaching out when he passes the baby to you. you're about to stand up and go to the guest room to feed her, but jungkook is already arranging the pillows next to him for you, grabbing a baby cloth on the side too.
"do you need another pillow?" he muses aloud, but he's already grabbing the ones on his side of the bed before you can answer, forming a wedge for you to sit nicely beside him. he looks up at you when you fail to move. "are you okay?"
"yeah i, um," you chew your lip nervously. "you don't...mind me feeding here?"
you immediately regret the question once it leaves your mouth. jungkook's crestfallen expression hits you right in the stomach, round eyes glittering up at you. he hasn't looked this upset since he woke up nearly a month ago. "why would i ever mind?”
"oh jungkook," you sniff, sitting beside him. he pulls you into the nest of pillows beside him, arm winding protectively around your shoulders. your eyes brim with sympathy tears, tired and angry and upset with treating him like a stranger.
"if i make you feel uncomfortable, i can go," he offers quietly. "if it makes you feel weird i understand..."
"no, not at all," you rush to stop him, suddenly realising how close you are. you could kiss his pink little lips if you just tilted your head up. "i just didn't want to make you feel weird. all this new stuff is happening to you, you're suddenly a husband and a father with no recollection of signing up or it and i just...i don't know how much you want to invest the second time around," you scramble to finish your sentence when he pins you with a concerned expression. “as in, i understand if you don’t want to make the same choice twice. it’s a big decision.”
he shakes his head dismissively. there wasn't a thing in the world that could make him turn his back on his family but it looked like you still needed convincing. he peers at you curiously when you position the baby. "so i can stay?"
you smile at him eagerly. "of course," you undo the nursing strap of your bra before the baby finally latches. "i actually prefer it when you're here. it makes me feel safe."
jungkook watches quietly while you hum for the baby, playing with her little hand while she drinks. the adoration seeps out of him in waves, how serene you look while you rock her, how angelic eunmi looks while she blinks her big doll eyes up at you both. she won't stay this little forever. he feels so overwhelmed by it, gathering you further in his arms with the urge to hold his family in his hands like a diamond. you don't question the little sniffles jungkook buries into your hair, resting your head on his shoulder wordlessly. you missed being held by him, missed his cotton scent and gentle breath.
"i love her so much," he whispers into the shell of your ear, entranced by the baby's little gurgles and gulps. he reaches out to run his knuckle over the velvet of her cheek, round and stuffed with milk. "i feel like i'll die, i love her so much."
"me too," you smile. "it was scary and hard for a long time but...i'm so glad we had her. i wouldn't trade her for anything."
you feel jungkook's lips trace your temple, heart stuttering upon the sudden contact. you hear what he doesn’t say: i wouldn't trade either of you.
x
x
x
"why are you so sweaty?" jimin scowls, noting the dark patches under jungkook's t-shirt when he tries to take the baby from his arms. "it's not even humid today."
jungkook doesn't do anything but gulp and cuddle a sleeping eunmi closer to his chest. she's become somewhat of a security blanket for him; even if she wasn't awake to play, he was always itching to hold her and nuzzle into her head when he's tense or embarrassed. like now.
"leave him alone, you know he sweats when he's shy," yoongi grins.
"stop it," jungkook mumbles.
"shy? what for?"
"because he's got a crush on his wife," namjoon snickers, knowing jungkook would whack him one if his arms weren't around his kid. "why are you looking at me like that? it's true!"
"but you can't just say it! she'll hear!" he hisses.
"you're married," jimin deadpans but it only makes the younger boy curl in on his baby more. "god, this reminds of when you two met. remember how he used to hide behind manager hyung every time ____ came in? and then i had to listen to them fuck in the next room for a year only to end up back here all over again-"
"jungkook," you call. "where did these come from?" you walk into the sitting room with a bouquet of yellow roses nestled in your arms. "did a fan send them? i didn't see a note they were just on the worktop-"
"th-those are for you," he mumbles. "i got those for you."
you look so pretty when you stare it makes him sweat harder and the three older boys all but burst a vein in their head trying not to laugh when leaving the room. there's an awkward silence where you clutch the flowers and he clutches the baby. "thank you," you say finally. "they're beautiful, i love the colour yellow..."
his big doe eyes round up to look at you even though the lower half of his face is smushed into pigtails. "you're welcome."
"can i kiss you?" you blurt out, too fast to stop it. your cheeks are still stinging and you're pretty sure you have baby powder in your hair but jungkook looks at you with awe as he nods so vigorously his earrings shake.
so you do, leaning over the arm of the sofa to press your mouth over his long enough for both your breaths to catch. you pull away, moving to sit next to him so his free arm can wind around your shoulders when you kiss him again. "please," he mumbles when you part. "please don't ask to kiss me. just do it," he leans for another long, warm kiss that leaves you light headed. "stop tip-toeing around me, okay? we're married. i know i scare easy, but not that easy."
you feel giddy, finally feeling the weight being lifted piece by piece. "okay," you peck his mole endearingly before scooting up for another kiss. "i missed this."
"me too," he hums into your mouth. "it feels like the first time but also...not the first time, you know? not just because i don't remember but like," he doesn't know how to say it, wetting his lips thoughtfully. your chapstick is cherry flavoured, his favourite. "like we've been doing this for longer than both of us even realise. longer than this life."
"i know," you nod. "i know."
x
x
x
after a while, you forgot about jungkook's amnesia altogether. even though the chances of him making a full recovery were slim, it all felt so normal and back to routine, all the kissing and the cuddling and the playing with eunmi. there was almost no room for trepidation anymore. until now.
you moan into jungkook's mouth when he pulls you onto his thighs, big hands palming your ass when you grind into him. he's only mildly concerned that he'll cum in his pants at this rate but he doesn't fret too much: that was secondary to undressing you and touching you and pleasing you and making you scream as loud as he could make you without waking the baby. he has nearly three years of re-learning your body to catch up on and he's eager to start.
he's quickly reminded during this process that you are a master. you know exactly where to kiss him, exactly how much pressure to kneed into his cock with your hips, exactly how much tongue he wants in his mouth until he's whining and damp for you. of course you know his body like the back of your hand - your child wasn't conceived from thin air. it makes him all the more desperate to learn, almost antsy to get his mouth and hands on you until you're writhing and breathless beneath him.
you gasp when you feel his hand slip between your legs, rubbing his fingers over your shorts. you automatically rock your covered wetness into his touch, the long whimper you muffle into his neck sending jungkook soaring through the clouds with pride. you're so lost in the feeling, having missed it so much, you're barely able to squeak a stop! when he hooks his fingers inside the waistband of your panties.
his eyes shoot open. "what's wrong?"
"j-jungkook," you shuffle in his grip, feeling so embarrassed under his scrutiny you don't know where to look. "it's not that i want you to stop but. listen, just," you cling to his shoulders, shivering when his hands drag reassuringly up to your waist. "just remember that...i've had a kid, okay? i'm not gonna look like before."
he blinks. "i don't remember what you looked like before."
"no, i mean like," you lick your lips, tasting him there. "it's still something to keep in mind. i'm not gonna be as smooth and perky in places like all those idol girls you perform next to, so just-" he watches you fumble nervously in his lap, the growing disbelief making him blink. "don't expect too much okay? things might not look the way you imagine them to and i don't want you to feel-"
"stop," he cuts off, tugging you so you're seated over his erection again. the look jungkook pins you with is so intense you can feel your pulse thrum in your ears, the harsh rise and fall of his chest making him appear that much more passionate. "this body," he slips his hands up your top, palming your skin. "made my child. i take offence to it being spoken about with anything less than admiration, even by you."
"kook-ah," you say nervously, but still let him remove your pj top over your head before you laying you under him on the bed. you don't know why your eyes suddenly prick with tears when he traces over your stretch marks and discoloured skin with his smooth lips. "this kept my daughter warm," he kisses under your navel, sliding up to your heavy breasts. he kisses each darkened nipple, swollen from the baby's mouth. "these feed her." he rises further still, before planting his mouth on your forehead in a short peck. "and this raises her. so how can i be anything but proud to touch you?"
"jungkook, stop," you sniff, tears wetting your lashes. your eyes fall shut when he wipes them away with his thumb, lips ghosting over your cheeks and nose.
"what did i say about tip-toeing around me?" he whispers, forcing you to look him in the eye. only then do you see the tears there, all the ardour and respect he holds for you pooling in those brown depths. "i'm your husband. let me be your husband."
you kiss him before you can start crying again, letting him part your mouth and taste you long and hard before finally undressing himself and slipping your shorts off. this is all a first for him, and it's been so long since you've done this it's almost like a first for you too, frantic and messy and desperate to feel jungkook lodged inside you where he belongs. you know he must share the sentiment when he splits your thighs over the narrow of his hips, hooking them there while he gets a good look of his erection rubbing through your slick.
no wonder i knocked her up, jungkook muses faintly. i don't think i can ever stop doing this.
"jungkook, please," you run a hand through his hair, grinding against his cock in encouragement but he still won't take the plunge. instead, your voice reminds him of his initial objective, causing him to saunter down between your legs faster than you can process. he's licking into you before you can have a second thought about it, mouth falling open with a loud moan when he traces around your clit in firm circles.
he has your knees over his shoulders and his arms wound around your hips so you have nowhere to go, nothing to do but buck into his attentive mouth, jungkook's groans vibrating against you until you can barely keep yourself together - he's always enjoyed this as much as you have. which is why he takes his time, explores every crevice and subsequent response, relishing in the gush of wetness when he does something right. he even goes as far as holding his tongue stagnant against your folds so you have no choice but to rub yourself into him for friction, so entranced he is by your invigorating reactions. only when you're squirming and whimpering with deliriousness does he finally give in and resume a steady pace over your swollen clit, two fingers sliding in home so you have something to come around. and you do.
messy and wet and shrieking into the pillow by your head so that you're muffled enough to not wake the baby down the hall, your orgasm drawing out longer than normal as you do your best to ride it out. jungkook carries you through it, gulping down as much of your arousal as he can manage until your hips finally drop back into the bed in post-climax exhaustion. on the contrary, the only reason he stops lapping at you is because you tug him away by the hair, bringing him up to you and between your legs again before he can do anything about it.
he splutters with a moan at the sudden contact of your wetness against his cock again, eyes fluttering shut and allowing you to bring him in, arms and legs winding securely around him so that you're flush against each other, hips rocking in tandem. jungkook is so caught up in the feeling - not the sex but the safety of being held, being connected like this - that you're the one to reach down and position his tip against your hot center, before finally running your hands down your husband's back to cup his ass and shove him into you.
jungkook gasps, breath shaking at how tight you are. you're so hot, so snug around him his eyes shut upon instinct, letting your hands guide his hips and showing him how to move in that perfect rolling motion that you're only familiar with after years of practice. and jungkook, of course, is a fast learner. it doesn't take long for him to take the reigns and fuck you just how you like it, adding in a sharp snap of his hips every now and again just to listen to you squeak in surprise. the wet sounds of your joined arousal coupled with you moaning under him is near cathartic, sending him hurtling to his finish line.
but before he can get there you shift him over, thick thighs helping you roll and pin him under you on the bed. jungkook grapples at your waist when you resume a slower but harder rock of your hips that has his length grinding against your clenching walls, his head thrown back at the intensity of it. you ride him through it, peppering the moles on his pretty neck with kisses and sucks, mouth finding his stiff little nipple to give it a swirl too. it's exactly what he needs to finish off, fingers digging into your flesh as he bucks wildly, filling you full of his seed while he calls your name. you slow to a stop when his hands finally fall limp on your thighs, his chest heaving under you and covered in sweat. you giggle. he always got so sweaty.
"you did so well, kookie," you whisper, kissing his damp neck and collar bones. his arms are suddenly around you again for comfort. "you were so good for me...always so good to me..."
"you," he croaks finally, eyes half lidded and a little delirious. "you didn't finish?"
you giggle at his genuine concern, pecking his wet lips. "i got mine, remember?"
"how many times?" jungkook is suddenly alert, tugging your wrist to get your attention before you can climb off him. his other hand is still around your middle so moving was out of the question until he allowed it. he was still inside you. "how many times do i usually make you come?"
you blink in embarrassment. you never really thought about it, let alone counted. "um...i don't know..." he waits for an answer, awfully serious about it. "a-at least two or three, i guess."
you yelp when he flips you back over, fingers immediately prying your cum soaked folds apart to nestle inside. "then don't act like we're done."
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excaliburofficial · 3 years
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OMG I SAW UR NAIGUS HEADCANONS AND THEY MADE MY SEROTONIN LEVELS GO OFF THE WALLS GRGRG DO U HAVE ANY HEADCANONS FOR KILIK RUNG?
YEEEEEEEEEEEEEE I GOT YOU FAM I GOT YOU
Thank you for the ask!! I'm glad my Naigus headcanons facts striaght from Okubo's email made you happy! :)
Kilik is honestly also a super cool character that needs more love I feel????? He just gives me such wholesome vibes idek so I'm really happy to be doing these since he's such a stand up dude tbh
Headcanons I have about Kilik Rung
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He's a really rational thinker and obv very very competent but his real strength is his resolve
He has a very strong personal moral code and will always stand by and do what he thinks is right. A lot of integrity from Kilik!!
He's a very dependable person and an all around good friend. He's pretty emotionally intelligent person who says what he means and gives good advice and is very loyal to the people he cares about the most
What some might think is being hot headed is just a result of his passion and drive. He isnt really reckless or arrogant or anything, he just gets overwhelmed with his determination and passion in the heat of the moment
He doesnt really like ambiguity much and is a problem solver
He really liked things like Karate Kid and DBZ growing up and a lot of the lessons and messages really stuck with him
Got really involved in like combat sports like martial arts and wrestling pretty young because of how much the idea of personal strength in those movies/shows really meant to him
Hes very focused in general in personal growth both with physical capabilities and with his interpersonal relationships
He's absolutely the type to lift up the other people around him so they can be their best selves
He was interested in going to the DWMA largely because it seemed like a good fit for his lifelong interests and skills and goals and HE WAS RIGHT
But tbh he was actually a little hesitant specifically because he didn't think he could find a weapon partner that matched his more close/direct preference from his sport experience and karate movie influence but in the end decided to go ahead and try
After all he could learn to use a weapon pretty quickly if he needed to and who would pass up the chance to be a meister? Esp when he has the passion for it already?? Not Kilik no way cause he knows what he wants and will get it
Enter Fire and Thunder who were worried about finding a meister who would think about using a hand to hand combat style cause they kinda require it
And because Kilik is in general just this down to earth and intelligent (esp socially) person matching wavelengths with both of them wasn't really an issue
He's pretty popular at DWMA and will talk to just about everyone he sees like he's known them forever
He became such good friends w Ox because he saw that Ox was just kind of this super serious guy and was like "hmmm he could probably benefit from lightening up some"
And as it turns out they actually had a lot in common esp when we're talking about self improvement even if they have different approaches to that
He actually really respects Ox as his peer and they do a lot to lift eachother up, in fact Ox is probably one of the people he respects the most
Plus both of them having thunder attacks helps them bond haha
Is generally just a stand up guy overall who puts effort into everything he does
Outside of combat/DWMA stuff he's really into music! He has a wide variety of stuff that he listens to and has made a ton of different playlists for friends and different occasions
Idk if I necessarily think he's aroace but when we see him in the series I get the feeling that he's def more focused on his friendships and personal goals than romance or anything which like good for him
Really likes filling foods with complex carbs like pasta and baked potatoes but isn't a picky eater like at all which I might just say bc im hungry and could really go for a baked potato or noodles rn but ssssshh
Has at least 1 teddy bear that he's has since he was a baby and will never get rid of and still has his baby blanket
Probably really loves his grandma. Idk anything about his grandma except that he loves her a lot
Very proud of what he's been able to do WHICH HE SHOULD BE YOU GO KILIK and is excited to be able to do more and see what he and his peers are capable of
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