#i still think that REDACTED is happening and it will hurt just as much

[bejeweledmp3]

EVERYTIME. i go to twitter for fandom stuff. i remember why one should never go to twitter for fandom stuff lmao

[aq2003]

so john smith is a character that ten "made up" (ie. the tardis generated him to fit the time period it picked). a fundamentally empty person that he can't control will do. someone that is missing the inherent parts of what makes ten himself, like not just his two hearts but things that truly deeply matter to him. things like not hurting anyone or not abandoning a companion or not being someone that teaches children how to shoot a weapon and fight in a war. human ten might show echoes of normal ten here or there like the art or the intelligence but their differences are rly kinda the point of the arc. multiple times human ten is given the opportunity to give himself up and sacrifice himself for those around him and it's only until the very, very last minute that he makes the decision that normal ten would've done in an instant. this isn't your normal amnesia storyline; ten temporarily erased himself from existence to give the family of blood a chance of dying peacefully, and replaced himself with someone else who wouldn't do that same thing; who is so ordinary and complacent and cishet and probably even likes the texture of pears

[minakoaiinos]

Anyway good morning.

[wannaremember]

.

[lavender-femme]

don’t call don’t text don’t read the tags if you don’t wanna see my sad thoughts

[aimedis]

milo as a dad headcanons (+sweetheart) !!

milo and sweetheart have twin sons (am i milking the redacted boys w twins headcanon?)

Dad Milo who was, unsurprisingly, very nervous to be a dad because of his own father but was also worried about his child(ren) growing up with a Department worker

But they both handled it with so much grace

Dad Milo who almost passed out when they found out he was having twins

Parents Milo and Sweetheart whose twins are literally identical and are nearly impossible to tell apart aside from the fact that the oldest's hair is longer than the youngest's (even before they got hair, Milo and Sweetheart could tell them apart easily) 

The twins have an attitude that rivals Milo and Sweetheart's combined (so much so that Sweetheart has threatened to beat their ass) ((does not believe in hitting them though)) 

Parents Milo and Sweetheart who swear in front of their kids but respect that other parents don't want that around their kids (the swearing doesn't make their kids scared of them at all)

Parent Sweetheart who is generally a pretty gentle parent, the slightly vulgar language is only used when the twins are being excessively difficult for the sake of being difficult 

Dad Milo who is insanely protective of his kids (but not in an overbearing way, in the ‘if you hurt my kids you’re dead’ way) 

Sweetheart the workaholic who has literally left work hours earlier to get their oldest a cake pop after he called from Milo’s phone

Dad Milo whose lockscreen is a picture of the twins sitting on the kitchen counter with ice-cream all over their faces

Dad Milo who almost cries when he holds his son as he screams bloody murder while getting vaccinations

Dad Milo who pretends it doesn't hurt whenever one of the twins screams 'i hate you!' in a toddlerlike fit of rage but even after the apologies and makeups, he lies awake at night thinking about it over and over (because maybe he's just like his dad after all)

Dad Milo who still remains calm and firm in his discipline but also remembering to be kind and careful with his boys

Dad Milo who sings and dances with the twins

Parents Milo and Sweetheart who rarely argue in front of their kids

Dad Milo who is practically a seer when it comes to the boys, watching them intently and preventing them from doing stupid things that could get them (seriously) injured before it actually happens 

Parents Milo and Sweetheart who are so used to being punched by their kids

The house during the solstice after the twins get their powers is a mess (Milo makes it his mission to take care of everyone no matter how shitty he feels) 

Dad Milo who pretends the twins being clingy is a hindrance but secretly loves when they want to be around him

Parent Sweetheart who walks around the house on business calls while carrying one (or both) of the twins in each arm (Milo thinks it’s domestic as all hell)

Dad Milo and the twins play a game where he pretends to attack Sweetheart (sometimes in his wolf form) and the twins try to defend them by hitting him and standing in front of them with their arms held out (Milo finds it hilarious, Sweetheart finds it mildly annoying because they always do it when they’re trying to work)

Parents Milo and Sweetheart who are the biggest bullies to their kids (in a loving way)

Parent Sweetheart who only pretended to not be able to tell the difference between the twins one time but their youngest got so upset he started crying, so they didn’t do it again

Dad Milo who treats every messy drawing or art project as the next Mona Lisa (tells everyone their oldest is gonna be a big artist someday)

Dad Milo who is the type to hear one of the boys (or god forbid, both of them) likes a type of snack, food, or drink and buy enough to fill a store (“Dad I can’t eat all of that!”)

Parents Milo and Sweetheart who are definitely the hot parents at parent teacher interviews

Dad Milo who actually can’t say no to the boys (Marie has to talk some sense into him every so often)

Dad Milo who is beyond happy that his kids love his Ma just as much as he does

Dad Milo whose kids are shifter/stealth hybrids (idc if it’s not plausible or possible) and nearly has a heart attack every other day because he has three menaces teaming up to scare the shit out of him

Dad Milo who takes pictures of his family everyday

Parent Sweetheart who gives the boys a very serious lecture about bullying, telling them to be kind to others and if people aren’t kind to them, they should tell them right away

Dad Milo who constantly stresses the importance of letting him kids know that they can talk to him and tell him anything, even if they might get in trouble (“I’d rather be disappointed while I come pick you up from somewhere you’re not supposed to be rather than sitting at your funeral”)

Parent Sweetheart who nearly quits on the spot when they’re called to release their sons from a department cell. Twice.

Dad Milo who uses empty, pointless threats on his toddlers to get them to behave (“Hey, if you don’t stop screaming, I’m gonna have to go outside and pick a flower.”)

Dad Milo who picks up the boys by their shirts to turn them around when they’re going somewhere they’re not supposed to be

Dad Milo who can’t help but smile whenever he hears anything that reminds him of his family, of home

[cardentist]

"haha Wow can you Believe how crazy it is that jay outed tim's medical records?"

Hoody:

1: stole tim's records from when he was 8 years old, which meant that he had to Specifically and Intentionally track them down To steal them. from his house? Maybe, we certainly see him breaking into tim's house plenty. (though why would tim even still have those)

2: baited jay both in person and online implying that tim was lying to him (reminder, the last guy who lied to jay about his intentions tried to kill him with a gun and turned out to have tried to murder all of his friends. and tim himself had watched jay sleep, been in videos threatening him right before jay's apartment burned down, and tried to physically attack him.)

3: intentionally planted the records in a scary tunnel under the abandoned burned down mental hospital and lead jay there by the nose, going so far to write how much of liar tim is in big bold sharpie on the files themselves.

4: after all of this happened hoodie's immediate next step was to break into tim's house, steal his medication, and intentionally set off and film tim having a seizure and post it on the internet.

Hoodie leaked tim's medical records, he specifically and Intentionally baited jay into finding and documenting them because it proved that tim was lying about the slender haunting only starting recently for him.

and it's important to note that jay's response wasn't to get angry with tim, it was to Blame Himself and express empathy for tim.

it's Also worth noting that the majority of the records were redacted (including tim's Name), which is a point in favor of both jay And hoodie (hoodie still cares about tim, even if he's angry at him and willing to hurt him to push him towards what he thinks needs to be done).

moreover, jay's censored tim's last name before (several times, actually), just like he's censored amy and jessica's phone numbers. I think it's safe to assume that part of the reason why jay filmed it was because those details Were redacted (that and, of course, evidence keeps disappearing from his house and from his laptop. which means if he forgets about them and they're stolen then they're just gone- if there isn't some other record of them online, of course).

my point being, it burns my ass that people blame jay for this and hold it against him like it's the worst thing that he could've done, without ever holding it against hoodie.

I feel like this is a cross section of fans only holding characters accountable for what other characters get mad about (tim was Right to be angry at jay for it, but he didn't call out hoodie. probably because there'd be no point, he can't exactly hold him responsible. likewise jay Deliberately didn't get mad at tim about what he did as masky, at least not openly, so fans tend to not understand his perspective)

And fans holding jay to a different standard than they do other characters in general. whether it's because most of his personal information is on his twitter (secondary material people are less likely to go through, especially while watching), because his voice acting tends to be less emotionally charged (it was probably just that troy's acting was a little awkward, but I personally like to read him as autistic), Or because he's just generally not as cool.

either way, people tend to hold jay accountable for things they let tim and hoody off the hook for. and it's kind of Really insane in this case.

[slushiepizza]

I Love You, Just Like This

Guy/Honey (Redacted Audio)

Loving has never come easy for Honey. Physical affection nor words of affirmation has never been their forte, yet they desperately wanted Guy to know that they love him more than they could express.

Tags : Angst, Hurt/Comfort, Honey works at Vesta and Kayla is Honey's Coworker, Struggles with Affection/PDA, Swearing

also on ao3

notes : SDHBSHDB this is my first fanfic ever;; and I don't really know what I'm doing

Sheets of torrential rain poured down on Dahlia. Honey looked down upon their now-ruined shoes as puddles started to form under the side of the office building that they’d taken refuge in. They shifted from one foot to the other. It’d been a long, tiring day of work and they’d do anything to crawl under the covers and sleep, yet the late-August weather didn’t seem to be on their side. Sighing, they pulled their work blazer against their cold, miserable body. 

A voice came from beside them. “Damn, it still hasn’t stopped raining?” 

“Yeah. Been thirty minutes and no signs of slowing.” 

Kayla, fellow Vesta Distribution Co. employee, started typing on her phone, the light of the monitor glowed against her face. “Are you also taking an Uber, or-? We could share the ride if we happen to live in the same direction.” 

“Uh, no. Thanks for the offer, though. My boyfriend is coming. Although there’s no telling when he’ll be here. Traffic and all.” 

“Huh,” Their co-worker looked up from their phone. “Is he also from work, or?” 

Honey gave a dry laugh. “No, but, you’ve met him, remember. It’s Guy, my plus one at your engagement party?” 

“...Right. I don’t know, I just assumed that you were friends or something. No offense, but the two of you seemed distant, is all. And I never really pegged you to be the type for relationships.” 

“What’s that supposed to mean?” 

“I’m not sure, it’s your whole…vibe. I guess. You can come across as intimidating. Like, those new-hires you trained? Completely terrified of you. It’s like they’re trying not to shit their pants every time you give them feedback. Same thing with your boyfriend. It’s like you’re tense. You guys didn’t even hold each other’s hand or anything. That’s why I assumed you’re just friends. ” 

Honey tightened their grip on their work bag. “Really,” they said in disbelief, trying to not sound hurt.  “I don’t do it on purpose. And my criticisms were all constructive.” 

They ignored the second comment.

“I know,” Kayla reached out and patted them on the shoulder. “I mean, for what it’s worth, I don’t think you’re all that…imposing. Much. Anyway, my ride’s here. See you on Monday.” She took out an umbrella and walked away to the awaiting car. 

Honey was alone again, and it gave them all the time in the work to mull over their co-worker’s words. The bright, fluorescent lights of the skyscrapers of Dahlia’s Business District  made Honey feel small. As cars zoomed past, Kayla’s words echoed in their head. 

I just assumed that you were friends or something. The two of you seemed distant. 

It hit them like a pile of bricks. A dull, painful feeling wormed its way in their chest. The sound of rain against the pavement rang in their ears. 

“Honey!” 

They turned around to see him, and oh, how they ached. Guy fixed them with a toothy smile, and looked at them with more love than they deserved as he held the umbrella over their head. He giggled, “Aw, is my honey-baby cold? Tired, perhaps? Never fear, as your noble cavalier is here to rescue you.“ 

“Hey.” In the quiet of their car, his voice quieted to a whisper. “Long day at work?” 

“Yeah, it’s been a shitty day. I’m ready to pass out.” They cleared their throat  and mumbled. “Thanks, by the way. For picking me up.” 

“Of course. I’d never leave my amazing, beautiful, partner stuck in the rain. Alone, in the cold, craving the warm embrace of their sexy and handsome boyfriend.” 

“You shouldn’t have to. It’s late, and I know the shift at Max’s tired you out already.” 

Guy did look exhausted. Honey was well aware of how packed his schedule was, with the pitch meeting that ran all morning and his sixteen-hour shift at the pizza place. There were bags under his eyes, yet when he wasn’t looking at the road, his eyes still gazed at them so warmly. 

“You know that it’s nothing. You underestimate me, Honey! I’m very familiar with being tired, just like how you tired me out last night, eh-” 

“Guy!” They said, exasperated, yet a laugh escaped their lips. “You’re so stupid.” 

“Oh, you love me for it,” he sang as his right hand rested against Honey’s thigh, searching for theirs. Guy’s hand was warm as his fingers interlocked with theirs and gave a reassuring squeeze. 

Silence soon fell over the two of them like a blanket, and all Honey could think was the way the light from passing cars outside the window illuminated Guy’s soft features. His brows furrowed in concentration, yet his eyes were unbearably kind. His mouth curved into a relaxed smile like this was easy. Like loving them was second nature.

It was always like this, with Guy. They knew that he’d do anything for them, things beyond being stuck in bad-weather and traffic when he could’ve been resting after working all day. 

A heavy feeling washed over them. Did Guy know that they’d do anything for him, too? 

Honey loved Guy. More than anything. Yet this much love for someone was uncharted territory for them,  the vulnerable feeling wormed under their skin uncomfortably. A familiar line of thought came, one that they have visited and revisited multiple times whenever they thought about their boyfriend. 

Guy deserved someone who could love him properly. 

They knew this about Guy: when he loved someone, he’d love them with his whole being. It’s the boundless, unrestrained sort of love, with nothing held back. Everyone in his life would attest to that, even if they did so with an eyeroll and sigh. 

A memory came to mind. Back in college, when they weren’t dating yet, Honey had a horrible fever. It’d been their second night at Dahlia, and they were stuck in bed. Guy, the college-assigned roommate they barely knew at the time, stayed by their side with a bowl of chicken noodle soup when all of his friends were out on freshman-year parties. 

Caring for someone never came naturally for Honey. They were used to being there for themselves, and they just drifted. They came and went from people’s lives without saying a word, only making their presence known when necessary. 

It finally dawned on them; they should try harder, for Guy’s sake.

 Acting so indifferent towards him to the point that their coworker never knew that they were in a relationship with him was a clear sign that they haven’t been putting enough effort to love him. The pangs of guilt clawed at their insides, and they desperately wished that they didn’t have so many hard edges. 

“We’re hooome. Now it’s time for a shower and later we can be snug as a bug in a rug-,” Guy turned to look at them and paused. 

“...Honey? Are you okay?” 

“I’m fine.” 

They swallowed the lump in their throat. They felt so useless, here they were, being a burden to him again. Guy looked at them with a concerned expression.

”We don’t have to talk about it right now, if you don’t want to. It’s just that- There’s something’s on your mind, isn’t there?

Honey averted their gaze. Please don’t look at me like that. 

“Guy,” they started, trying to force the words out of their mouth.“Do you want me to…do more PDA?” 

Honey was horrified. It definitely was not how they wanted to sound. It’s embarrassing, almost juvenile. 

Guy didn’t laugh. His thumb ran soothing circles in the back of their palm. 

“Honey, no.” he frowned. “Where’d that come from?” 

“Well, a coworker said that she assumed that we were friends. Presumably because we seemed… distant. And she’s right, you know, it is a little weird that we don’t really do that when other people’s around. All because I’m afraid of people staring and I just- can't.” Honey felt warm tears started rolling down their face. 

“And fuck, Guy,” Honey choked back a sob. “I want people to know that I love you. I want you to know that I love you so damn much.” 

“Honey,” his voice sounded hurt. “Can I hold you?” 

As they nodded, he reached for them over the centre console and wrapped his arms around them. 

“I know, Honey. I know. You love me in ways that I can’t even describe. And you don’t have to do anything you feel uncomfortable with to prove that to others. ” 

His honey buried their face in his chest, staining his shirt, yet he paid little mind. “You gave me more love than I deserve. I know you love me because you stayed with me when I struggled to finish my manuscripts. Because you told me to rest when I was sick and refused to stay still.” 

“You were such a little shit back then,” they sniffed. 

“I know!” he laughed.” And you laid down with me until I fell asleep, even when you had a lot of work to do.” 

“I have no doubt that you love me, Honey,” Guy tightened his hold on them. “And I love you, just like this. Just as you are.” 

The rain outside the car slowed into a light drizzle, and in the stillness of the night, there were no witnesses to how Honey cupped the side of Guy’s face and kissed him. 

[chronicsyd]

Actually, I’ve got a few redactions + Add on's about the long ass post on the S2 trailer I made a couple weeks ago.

So while I still think Vi painted the gauntlets black to disguise herself, I’m thinking the fight with Warwick damages them again because when Vi’s with Ekko here, they are different than how they first appeared. So Ekko and Heimerdinger could repair them before fighting Ambessa, also it would partially explain why he's here fighting with her at all (so to the anon that asked, yes i do agree that Ekko/Heimerdinger probably fixed them)

I’ve been seeing posts about Jinx kinda sorta “adopting” a kid in the new season (you can kinda see them in that clip with Smeech attacking Sevika) and there’s the scene with Undercity people surrounding Jinx having blue hair so my thoughts are now leaning more towards that this is that child in question than something having to do with Jinx or Powder herself. it would also explain Sevika's new look and such.

I'm SUCH an idiot but the gem imbedded in Viktor's wrist is most likely for the arm they showed back in S1, much like how they showed the gauntlets that Vi would eventually be using. I just didn't give the arm a second thought until now despite knowing The Machine Herald already had the third arm (insert face palm here...)

Back to the lines from Vi and Caitlyn from the announcement teaser 3 years ago, it's clear that they're talking about the temple fight that happens later on. Caitlyn has to see this through but she doesn't want to do it alone because she knows that she or Jinx is going to end up dead as a result; but Vi feels she needs to fight Jinx herself because we're probably going to see a bunch of stuff happen before the fight (like the Kiramman tent fight for example) because Vi says "no one else needs to get hurt", but at first I just thought that Vi was talking about Jinx's attack on the Council.

I'm still unsure who's in the orange that Ambessa's talking to because no ones signature color in Arcane has been orange as far as i know (it's been mainly reds, blues, whites, and golds) so I'm thinking that it's a hospital outfit of some sort (I could be wrong, but that's where my thoughts are towards) and she's talking to someone in Piltover that Can implement Martial Law and there's really only 3 examples that could do that: Caitlyn, Jayce, or Mel (if Mel happens to be alive of course. and I'm pretty sure the other Councilor's are about as dead as dogshit, or should be because besides Cassandra did you Really give a fuck about the rest of them?).

someone else pointed this out and I for the Life of me can't find their account but the lines on the floor point to this being Stillwater Hold, so at some point that's where Jinx's base of operations is, or she's just breaking them out but at least in this scene i don't think so.

I'm changing my stance on this, this is happening right before Act 3 (or more specifically, before we see her in the Ambessa fight). mainly because while the lighting is damn near impossible to make out, i think her hair is cut in this scene, she's also missing the ropes on her top. Mainly because when we see her with the finger prosthetic she still has her braids and that's Definitely happening post Act 1. so she's crying about something different from Silco here and I'm having a dreading idea on what it is...

I don't think Vi is carrying Cait on her shoulders, mainly because with the lighting the vest looks brown but when we see Caitlyn her vest is very clearly black. So not exactly sure who it is, I'm kinda thinking it's the blue fish guy (is Arcane gonna give us the names of Caitlyn's comrades yet?!) and the explosion we see with him isn't the same one that knocked Vi down. but that's just hypothetical, the only thing I'm Sure about is that Vi isn't carrying Caitlyn at least.

I have NO idea Why and I have NO credible sources on this but for some reason my brain keeps telling Sevika's dying. No i don't know the how or the when but it'd just be another tally of grief for Jinx (because we're probably going to see them get close despite their animosity back in S1) (and let's be real anyone that takes on even a Slight "parenting" role to Vi or Jinx is getting the axe, i don't make the rules)

So far the only thing I'm having trouble placing is uhhh everyone that Isn't Vi, Jinx or Caitlyn. because they've been Massively marketing the three of them but when it comes to people like Viktor and Jayce not a fucking clue. We got that clip of Ekko and Heimerdinger sneaking into Piltover where they probably do some sorta hextech experimenting but that's really the limit of my knowledge. I know the people I was confused about have to do with Viktor and the Glorious Evolution thing but other than that, I've really only got solid thoughts on our three ladies for the season.

Also it seems like tomorrow they're probably going to be showing us what they showed at the Annecy festival for pit fighter Vi back in June so... can't wait for that!

and that's what i got for now...

[zeevoidlight]

Why didn't he protected them

Is actually difficult for me to discern because Vegeta and Bulma went from getting close to each other and starting to trust each other enough to be intimate, even if it was just for the sex, to Vegeta not caring if she and baby Trunks died at all, and Bulma being very distant from Vegeta while still being in a relationship. And I don't believe the thing some say that he didn't actually cared for her or didn't actually noticed her in a deeper way until much later (basically the idea that Vegeta was just Trunks sperm donor and only was with Bulma for the sex), nah. diss's moch complcated, i swear (nah not really, I just want an excuse to talk more about my obsession). (Note that I watched the latin version so my interpretation of the characters and context might be different from the English version).

I'll talk about these event and about saiyan culture regarding babies, Vegeta and Bulma's relationship during the Cell saga, and how Vegeta might have felt towards Baby Trunks and Future Trunks.

//////////

Saiyans, family and culture

The popular idea is that yes, he was a major jerk by letting Bulma and Baby Trunks almost die at the start of the Android saga, and yeah, he actually was. But one thing that people often forget is that he is not human, he is a saiyan, and that kind of behavior wasn't that abnormal for his culture/species. Is actually expected.

I mean, Saiyan's used to send their babies (the weak ones) in capsules to other planets to pop out of the ship, project an artificial moon into the sky and start making havoc for months until everyone was dead. If the baby survives they will later go to the planet for him eventually to claim the planet and sell it, and I guess later reintegrate the little saiyan into their society again. Like a rite of passage just to acquire the right to live, otherwise they just die unceremoniously.

Even Bardock was like that (pre retcon because i will use the saiyan lore of the era to explain something of the same time period of it's creation). While the others were like "hey! You got a baby kid! Aren't you going to go to planet Vegeta to check on him? How about a celebration or something", and Bardock is like "NO. Who would want to visit a low class soldier like that, I'm not r-[redacted]" (man... DBZ Bardock was a different animal entirely, i freaking loved him). (I have the theory that Raditz was actually in the lower end of high class soldiers. maybe will talk about it in another post).

Anyway, yeah, that's basically the way of thinking of saiyans. A little bit like Piccolo's tough love type of survival training with Gohan but even more savage and detached because if they died and it was their kid it was gonna suck really bad and hurt a lot their pride but what had to happen happened since they cannot get involved in those first years and cannot go save them, end of story, make another baby, maybe the next one will be stronger. They just had babies to send them off, and they have a blood relation with each other but they didn't had the concept of a family, not exactly, like humans would have, usually though, because once again the royal family did had those kinds of bonds to precisely preserve their lineage and secure their babies would born powerful above everyone else.

Of course we all know Bardock was still worried about Kakarott and he wanted to appear tougher with his teammates, he was worried the same way every other saiyan does it in a very distant manner to not get their feelings get in the way of their job as warriors (I mean, he did passed by the nursery in his hurry and stopped to check on Goku while he was there after all). Much like King Vegeta himself who said that he didn't care about what happened to his son, Vegeta, after some saiyan royal adviser (or knight, idk) asks him if it's true that he will have to give his son to Frieza because Vegeta was going to be real in danger if he did in the flashback in the Frieza saga. He wasn't going to say "yes i do feel terrible for my son and it hurts me deeply" even if he was absolutely devastated, he says that he doesn't care because he cannot appear weak, and because it was also true what he said about being more angered by how Frieza had them under his thumb, in that moment he was decided to confront Frieza so he couldn't let himself feel.

And later Vegeta himself said he didn't cared about his race or his father to Dodoria when he was revealing the truth about their planet's destruction while at the same time is true that he was angered about being lied to and about being kept in their control since childhood . The thing is Vegeta doesn't care about the actual people of his race but more about what they represent and are supposed to be, only those who are saiyan in blood and meaning are worthy of calling themselves saiyan, that's why he doesn't revive them but he does care deeply and is proud of it, just in another level. And regarding his father we know he was lying because every time he remembers him in the series he does it fondly and with a lot of pride, like when he's outright telling Goku to avenge their parents, or when remembering him to give himself confidence that he will be able to become Ssj. Is not like they don't "care", but they have to be intelligent about what to reveal so it cannot be taken against them later and to a degree convince themselves on getting detached from many things to keep their fighting instincts up front and take decisions with their heads cold whatever had to happen. Just like we hear him say all terrified in Namek when Krillin got impaled by Frieza "What an idot!...That's what happened to him for paying attention to that Namekuseijin! (Dende)", and then after Gohan looses his mind and knocks Frieza down momentarily Vegeta tells Gohan "Don't loose your time worrying about him! [Krillin]. Do you think Frieza was going to die with that?!". Is what they don't say and try to hide (as we see explicitly with Vegeta when confronting Frieza he purposefully hid the existence of Goku from him and lied, making Frieza believe that Vegeta himself was the only saiyan survivor left but in his thoughts we hear him say "and Kakarott...").

Vegeta's priorities

Same can be said of Vegeta with baby Trunks, i would believe. Their children are their legacy in a way after all, and like an extension of themselves and their own ego. But what made Vegeta forget the feelings and pride he might have had with Bulma and Trunks to not even being a thing that was important is literally everything else going on around him at the same time in those years. It was a very conflicting era for him in several fronts, specially related to his place in the world, his newfound freedom from Frieza's hand since he was a child, him getting used to a new life in another culture, another planet, other type of people, his love relationship, his place as a saiyan in relation to the other few of his species, his title as prince among the low class saiyans that had surpassed him by this point and not by little, his twice stolen destiny to be the the legendary super saiyan that now that he became one as well he had to demonstrate he was the better Ssj among them, the news of him getting killed in the near future in another timeline by just some rando earthling androids that somehow were stronger than Frieza and that the android he defeated (19) alongside the other one (Gero) weren't the right ones, he was really pissed about it and starting to get worried, they couldn't sense the androids by their chi (ki), it was becoming a mess, and he absolutely HAD to be the one that would kill all the androids all on his own to go back to his rightful place in the power scale. Is quite the heavy burden.

So, family? his son? Bulma? ultimately they were at the end of the list of his priorities. And that is very clear thorough this entire first part, even when he was officially in his relationship with Bulma.

Bulma

That's partially why Bulma was attracted to him in the first place though, because he was extremely determined in his ambitions, she respects that, and saw how deeply it was hurting him when he had that training accident and was subconsciously talking in his sleep. She was going to carry that responsibility for him so he could focus on himself. That's why she doesn't reclaim him anything or judges him on things related to that other than jokingly. She knew what she was getting into and has always known. Unfortunately she isn't that responsible of a person herself though. That's why she herself puts her own life and Baby Trunks life in danger, because she is just as determined and obstinate, and Vegeta knows that as well, that's why he doesn't "care", because he respects her decisions as well (and ultimately can't do much about it either). If she wants to put their own lives in danger because she thinks she's up to their game is her responsibility then, not his, and he cannot get involved because he has a job to do regarding himself and his own battles, he had to be detached. Also he was annoyed and fed up with Bulma's stubbornness since he already told her not to be a stupid and do stupid things like put herself in danger way before when Frieza went to Earth, and now she's doing it again (the first time he thought it was hot though (it was so funny that he looks back at her and then talks to himself all thoughtful like "Not only she's vulgar but she's aggressive/daring too", translation -> 'I might like this chick'), but this time is a not cute at all). I don't think it was something personal, not even the "[..] foolish woman and her blasted child" thing, like he says in the english dub, he had more important things he had to worry about. What he says to Trunks in the latin dub is "What stupidities are you saying. I don't care in the slightest, you idiot" (i wish I could have found the japanese one but it is what it is and is the closest I have to it) so he doesn't say mean things to Bulma or Trunks specifically. The interesting part here is to think if Vegeta was saying "I don't care" because he actually didn't care, or "I don't care" not because he didn't but because he couldn't. Vegeta is terrified of feeling and has always been. And yes, I say he was absolutely right because what saiyans try to avoid by giving too information and care is exactly what happened and Gero used her as a distraction, blasted the place and with it Bulma's ship and escaped thinking that they were going to be too busy saving her to notice where he ran to. Still a dick move but I cannot blame him too much. So yeah, it is very much in the tone of if Bulma thinks she can be in the middle of the battle field then so be it, if they survive they'll prove themselves not to be to useless after all, if they die it will suck but it had to be for being idiots.

Being a warrior

Vegeta is a warrior first and foremost. And him being a warrior is why later he is excited to see Cell's perfect form, just like Goku (being a pure blooded saiyan) he cannot contain himself from seeing what immense power looks like, and dares Future Trunks to attack him if Trunks had the balls to do it in order to stop him. Like "bro, are you really gonna to go against your pops? prove it. That's why Future Trunks cannot comprehend him, because Trunks is part earthling and cannot fathom someone getting excited about fighting for the sake of fighting itself and proving one's self where power is the only thing that matters. And why Vegeta cannot stand Future Trunks either, because F Trunks fights for justice and peace.

Baby Trunks

About Baby Trunks, we can only speculate of course but I would assume baby Trunks was conceived right after Vegeta became super saiyan (?) because later in the Buu saga kid Trunks was able to become Ssj without any effort just like Goten (who was definitely conceived during that week Goku was in Ssj the whole time), while present/future Gohan and Future Trunks had to get the transformation the OG hard way like their fathers. I guess future Trunks did accidentally change the time where he would be conceived in the present timeline by just a bit since we do see that Vegeta becomes Ssj in future timeline, probably after Goku dies (he was present with the others in Goku's house when he died and Bulma already had Baby Future Trunks with her) and before the androids appear in the future timeline as we see him transformed to fight, though that's still my speculation.

I think even though Trunks was still a baby maybe there was a way for Vegeta to sense his initial power level (? I'm just assuming some things here). And I don't remember exactly when did saiyan babies were packed and sent to planets to conquer them (maybe a few months old and expected to destroy the people in the planet in around 6 months from arrival having Goku and Earth as an example in the Bardock special) but Baby Trunks definitely doesn't look powerful or very strong regardless, not compared to Vegeta himself as a baby. And Vegeta knew that the mix between saiyans with earthlings produced a stronger breed but just look at this little guy, he looks more earthling than saiyan without much promises, might as well not have much saiyan blood in him, he didn't had his black/dark hair, he wasn't even born with a tail. And also was being treated... well like a baby but an earthling one.

He probably was conflicted about the whole baby thing, specially by how he was taught on his saiyan side despite being from the royal family (since the royal family is one of the few that can actually have familial ties similar to humans), and how being now on Earth his perfectly normal for a saiyan actions were taken from an earthling perspective as not being adequate, but he couldn't entertain the thought for too long since the androids were gonna kill everyone if the warning was true anyways.

Vegeta didn't really considered Baby Trunks to be someone he should put any attention to. Although deep down he cared to a degree as in being an extension of his pride and how Trunks was ultimately "representing him" as his son. How that affected his relationship with Bulma too in this time period is important. Like, he seems angry that Bulma tells him that his presence made Trunks cry after his fight 19, and that is quite mean for her to say that to him, but he can't reply anything to her and just tch's and looks away all annoyed but doesn't say anything or fights her on it, so i can imagine he was feeling conflicted about how to act or respond on top of everything that he had to think about.

Pride on Future Trunks and school of hard knocks

Only when he discovered that the mysterious badass warrior from the future was his own son, the one that he was dismissing, then he started to quietly and secretly take pride on who he would become and started to pay attention to both F Trunks (in his own saiyan way) and much later to Baby Trunks because babies are not viewed as important in saiyan culture, still focusing on the battle first. Much like Bardock when he started to have his visions of Goku right at the very end of his life he started to view grown up F Trunks as more of an equal rather than competition, and seeing him grown up made it easier for him to bond. And so Vegs is like ".... Fuck yeah".

"Look at my son, Cell. He's not as cool as me but he's damn close" lol

He of course was also very prideful and wouldn't bother with any family related stuff the way Bulma (and F Trunks) were pressuring him to be, and she kinda was ridiculing him about it (jokingly though, never seriously) just to evidence him and kinda "hit him over the head" for his behavior. And his natural reaction is of course to appear tough in front of everyone else, like Bardock, like King Vegeta, and like his usual self, and throw all that family nonsense out the window. He still was very prideful and had to keep a face, but that is what would come bite him in the ass hard later on.

Trunks took the wrong way Vegeta's actions. He wasn't purposefully ignoring him, he didn't had time to bond or make him understand his methods, or teach him spelling everything out for him, at least the way he knew how to do it which is by the saiyan way, which was never going to work the way he remembered it because Trunks is half earthling, and that's something Goku also partially fumbled up with Gohan and his Rage form, but Vegeta was actually trying to teach Trunks the hard way. Vegeta was trying to actually come up with strategies, occupied on bringing solutions to the table that Trunks couldn't come up with for years in just the few days they had. Goku definitely knew it. Trunks is all "my dad has been on that rock for 3 days and he doesn't even look at me or train me" and Goku is like "shit! Vegeta is a Genius! He's trying to find a way to surpass the super saiyan", and Trunks can't understand what's happening while the two pure blood adult saiyans are talking. Like, remember the scene where F Trunks attacked Vegeta? Vegeta was actually trying to parent as a saiyan there, and feeling proud of Trunks before and after Trunks attacked him because he actually did it. He called him stupid and all but it was always accompanied with a lesson he wanted Trunks to learn, even if it was only to make him learn respect Vegeta's place as his father (and Trunks eventually came to respect him despite his shortcomings).

Vegeta and Bulma

Anyway... regarding Vegeta and Bulma though, I love how Vegeta talks to Bulma with such familiarity during the Cell saga (i just wished... the time skips didn't happen so quickly because it would have been excellent for character development outside of battle with small everyday stuff and hijinks...), and it does feel like he recognizes Bulma's intelligence and respects that aspect of her, he calls her by her name (which after 3 years I would hope he does but last time we just hear him call her "woman" so it was nice to hear him call her by her name), but then when Bulma starts to spit toxicity towards him or starts to act like she has her ego through the roof (which funnily enough is very similar to Vegeta himself when he feels confident and with his ego higher than the sky), he just looks like he's thinking "well you just can't find the off button, do you" (lol, it reminds me of home).

It actually reminds me a little bit of how Bulma and Yamcha's relationship was, on and off of Bulma being angry and with Yamcha and re-conciliating again, just this time is with Vegeta, but in Yamcha's relationship he was the one that just got all the (maybe undeserved) anger from Bulma and he didn't really had the balls to confront her because he's Yamcha and he's a nice guy but he doesn't have spice (like he used to as a bandit), while on the other hand with Vegeta is a constant battle for power in the relationship. They both act mean with each other, and even if it's not actually meant to seriously cause harm they can get get hurt and often do simply by the nature of how they relate to each other and communicate, with insults, sarcasm, back handed comments, ironic remarks, double meaning, either is to twist the knife where it hurts or even to be playful and flirt in a friendly manner, is almost never straight forward and i really can't picture them, specially Vegeta, saying that they love each other directly and explicitly but they don't have to. That's just how they are, is their game, because neither of them is willing to back out, they are both asses, though Vegeta is the one that normally does back out in the end in favor of keeping peace because he is the one that has more to loose even if it's by convenience and to keep his access to Capsule Corp and all the commodities at this point, and because he respects and admires Bulma too, he does love her in his own saiyan way and doesn't want to loose that bond he's made with her as the only other person he managed to trust and be open with (the other being Goku). (this scene is priceless and i just wanted to put it here. Is filler but i just don't care, it officially exists and is part of the collective that is DB and is good).

Bulma was ok with Vegeta not being present in their lives and only focusing on her baby, encouraging little Trunks in small ways to start developing some strength. She's always been her own woman after all, independent, confident, intelligent all on her own, always being in the middle of the conflicts since time immemorial to be part of the team too against whatever is menacing Earth. While at the same time is clear that Bulma is proud that her baby is Vegeta's because is a symbol of their deeper connection (and love if you will at this point), aaaaand because of the potential he has as a fighter and the status he gives her among the ones that know who Vegeta is (bragging rights, lol), and also brag about his perfect very cool and handsome son's genes. She was like "yeah Yayirobe, drop the child if you want, but be ware that that child is Vegeta's". (I swear that sometimes I wonder if Vegeta is the one in an abusive relationship full of toxicity, lol, the answer is they both are but flawed as it was it's what they both needed and what worked for them). (and i love this bit where Trunks falls to the ground trying to learn to walk and Bulma looks at him like "i'm not gonna do anything about it, get up on your own". Some of Vegeta is rubbing off on her, hehe).

Trunks was an accident?

About the baby, in a way Bulma and Vegeta, ever since they decided to engage sexually, were aware of the possibility of a child being born from both of them but had already accepted whatever outcome destiny had in it's plans regarding a possible offspring (when before Vegeta was very clearly against it for the fear of having a child that could be stronger than him to usurp his title and place). And to that i want to add that Trunks wasn't really planned by Vegeta in particular (I'm more sure that Bulma might have desired a baby from him after a certain point because she always fantasized with Goku once she saw him all grown up but "lost her chance" as she puts it, and now Vegeta represented another chance to have a badass baby), but that doesn't mean Trunks wasn't expected like many people believe (that Trunks was an accident). Vegeta had agreed with the consequences long before he knew they were pregnant, so no, i don't believe he was an accident as if they didn't thought having a baby wasn't going to eventually happen simply because they were having sex and a baby is to be an expected high chance result, but neither planned exactly. He just naturally happened and that was ok.

They are fine (Trunks is not fine)

Like, both Vegeta and Bulma seem actually pretty ok with the whole thing of being kinda distant kinda separate and on their own at that point while still being together as an official couple. Vegeta concentrating on his own things and not letting anything get in his way, being very saiyan about not letting himself feel (because otherwise his obvious parental instincts when Trunks gets killed and him later accepting his love for Bulma wouldn't make much sense if he actually didn't ultimately cared). Bulma seems pretty ok with putting herself and her child in danger while knowing she still has a job to do to help save the Earth just like Vegeta was doing in a way. Like, during the saga they are actually both working together, Vegeta asking her info on Dr Gero and her looking into her investigation about him in her memory, him asking if she brought the armors he requested for the z fighters and Bulma actually did made them and brought them with her. They are actually working together when it comes to the war against the androds and Vegeta is 100% concentratd on that and his issues while Bulma is enduring and helping as well, growing up from the brat she was into someone more mature but both still with things they need to work on.

The only one that cannot comprehend the dynamic here is Future Trunks. No one else feels it out of place or out of logic because it's Vegeta and it's Bulma. But like, Future Trunks gives too much credit to Vegeta for putting his Baby Trunks self in danger when it's very much Bulma's fault in this particular case. But that is because F Trunks made some high assumptions and probably fantasized with who his father might have been and was hit with the reality that he was not the way he imagined him, so he's putting a lot of expectations on Vegeta that when not met he gets angry but Vegeta is just like "dude i don't have time for this bs". And on the other hand Trunks also didn't knew how his mother was before she had to grow into someone more careful and responsible, so he cannot see his mother's faults because his love for her is blinding him from her wrong doings. (funny thing is that when she had the plane accident no one went to save Bulma either, lol). He has to learn to know his parents because he doesn't know them. Poor Trunks though XD.

////

Ultimately Vegeta changes his attitude during the end of the saga for the sake of both of them, and after having been smacked full force in the face with the realization that he did messed up in multiple ways during the saga after all, with the androids, with Cell, with Trunks too because of his cultural baggage. At the end he's much closer to Bulma and Baby Trunks, having accepted his role as father, not only the type of father Vegeta wanted to be but the father Trunks needed him to be, which still had a lot of room for improvement but it was a start, and he did changed quite a lot. Even caving in with some earthling behaviors for the better. Unnggh! is so beautiful!

[eldritchelfwriter]

What might have happened for Shadowheart & Florwyn after Reaching For You?

Massive spoiler zone for Reaching For You, the Dark Justiciar redemption one shot over on AO3, so don't read if you haven't read that!

Originally I was just going to type up some thoughts about things that might have happened next but instead I've ended up stream of consciousness writing the whole plot of a sequel story that I strenuously advise that I will never write. Don't consider this 'canon', it's just thoughts that flowed out, have your own head canons for sure.

Apologies that there are a couple of REDACTED's where there's something that hasn't been revealed in Shadowheart Begins yet that I don't want to spoil, but I think it would be relevant here.

There are 3,000 words coming so grab a cup of tea.

* * *

Florwyn and Shadowheart have finally reunited, but they have a long way to go, to find their new way as a couple and as individuals.

Florwyn is mindful of not wanting to push too hard and fast after everything Shadowheart’s been through, and they are both a little awkward with each other at first. Shadowheart has her own room in the castle and space to rest. She sleeps a lot, in the first couple of weeks after her ordeal in the Harper safehouse.

Shadowheart is privately a little afraid to be alone, but doesn’t tell Florwyn. Fortunately, Cirrus the dog, of his own accord has taken to sleeping at the end of Shadowheart’s bed, rather than Florwyn’s.

She has a lot of nightmares about Shar, and every day she wakes up wondering if being here, with Florwyn, is real, or if she’s dreaming. Then, a soft knock on the door each day at the same time reminds her it’s all real, and she sees Florwyn bringing her tea in bed with that patient and loving look in her eyes … every day, tea and a chaste kiss while Shadowheart recovers and starts to make the first steps toward being a person without Shar. They are very polite with one another, still trying to find their way. And for Shadowheart, receiving any kind of kindness at all feels overwhelming. Frequently she is secretly in tears when Florwyn leaves, just to be cared for.

One day, Florwyn pulls open the curtains in Shadowheart’s room and the light that pours in doesn’t scare Shadowheart any more. She greets Shadowheart, gives her her morning tea and leans in for her kiss, but this time, Shadowheart asks her to wait a moment. Placing the cup of tea on the bedside table, with nervous hands, Shadowheart pulls Florwyn in for a kiss that is anything but chaste and leaves them both dazed.

“I love you,” Shadowheart whispers. It’s the first time she’s said it since that moment in the Harper safehouse.

And Florwyn can see, there’s new life, and new spark in Shadowheart’s eyes.

“I love you, too,” Florwyn whispers back, heartened.

It’s a new day in every way, and this time, Shadowheart and Florwyn spend the whole day together, as Florwyn shows her properly around both the castle, and some of the grounds, Cirrus gambolling along at their sides.

That night, they resume their old habit, of reading together with a drink, but this time it is in front of a fire in the lounge – a room that is covered in books from wall to wall, save for the fireplace. Their eyes wander over the top of their books at each other frequently.

As much as Florwyn is mindful of Shadowheart’s recovery and the big personal journey she has ahead of her, Shadowheart is also mindful of how much she hurt Florwyn all those years ago. Florwyn’s heart is still tender both from that hurt, and the loss of her wife. She doesn’t want to push too far and crush the fragile thing they have between them, any more than Florwyn does. Just holding each other and a few kisses feels like a great deal as it is, given how affection-starved Shadowheart (and Florwyn) have been for a long time.

Night time reading and drinks continues for a while, the space between them growing ever more electric, and then Florwyn leaning herself comfortably against Shadowheart turns into a fierce desire in Shadowheart to kiss her that she cannot and does not ignore. The stories they had been reading soon topple to the floor as they kiss and slowly, almost gingerly allow their hands to roam and relearn the feel of each other. And then they are holding each other for so long, that they fall asleep on the sofa and wake up in each other’s arms to Cirrus licking both of their faces, wondering where his breakfast is.

The next night, it’s even more electric and neither can read at all. They once again end up making out but suddenly stopping when things are about to get frisky. And Florwyn asks, “can I ask, why you stopped?” and basically, Shadowheart is like “I was stopping for you because seemed like you wanted to take things slow,” and Florwyn is like “oh I was being extra respectful of you” and they both realise they absolutely want to fuck each others pants off and there is no reason not to, so they do just that right there and then in front of the fire, and all is wonderful in the world as they both realise just how much they still love each other, after the intensity of the time with the Harpers and then the sudden change to being just alone together.

They move into the same room together and wake up beside each other every day now, because there’s no need to hold back from the fact that they’re both utterly besotted with each other.

There are good days and bad days for Shadowheart. Sometimes she is so filled with grief and regret she cannot get out of bed. On others, she finds Florwyn on the castle rooftop experimenting with sorcery, or takes Cirrus on rambles through the countryside, or tries her hand at baking and other little domestic thing, trying to take care of Florwyn and be as thoughtful of her as much as Florwyn has been of Shadowheart.

Florwyn can see that this life here is a little lonely for Shadowheart, but they have to be pretty careful about going out given Shadowheart has a lot of enemies and did essentially just abandon the Sharran church which has now indeed been decreed illegal. Florwyn sends out letters to Karlach and Astarion who each visit separately. (Karlach incidentally, did not have her heart fixed as per Shadowheart Begins, because Shadowheart never met Yrre. She went to Avernus with Wyll and they eventually found a cure there).

Things are a little frosty at first with Karlach, Shadowheart still feeling hurt by her sense of rejection in the aftermath of her decision at the Gauntlet. But Karlach is nothing if not forgiving and loving and also just incredibly proud of her for finally choosing the light, and it’s hard to stay mad at Karlach, so things melt between them fairly quickly. It feels even easier with Astarion, because he is a person who made a fair few questionable choices in life, so she feels like she isn’t being judged by him, for all that she is facing up to the enormity of the consequences and loss her decisions have brought about.

Eventually though, it becomes clear that Shadowheart needs a life of her own, not just being inserted into Florwyn’s. She feels useless without her power, and her religion, and is still trying to build up her sense of self. She needs something of her own, to fill the gap where her old life use to be.

Jaheira comes to stay and while her and Florwyn are catching up, Shadowheart goes on a walk on the rocky shore by the castle, just thinking about stuff. And there she finds an osprey with a broken wing. It breaks her heart that she cannot heal any more. And something in her needs to see that osprey fly again. She gathers it up, paying no mind to its slashing claws leaving deep cuts in her arms as the frightened bird is taken to the castle, to Jaheira.

Florwyn is immediately freaked out to see how badly Shadowheart’s arms are bleeding, but Shadowheart is only interested in whether Jaheira can heal the bird – not her. She isn’t even bothered by the pain, what is pain to an ex-Sharran, anyway? Jaheira seems to understand what is going through Shadowheart’s mind better than Florwyn. She heals the bird first, and Shadowheart’s arms second.

The bird picks himself up, and Shadowheart watches him fly off, until she can’t make him out any more, feeling teary. She had needed to see that broken things could be healed. She is a broken thing that needs healing herself. And she wants to be able heal again, somehow. That was the only thing that had felt good, under Shar. Perhaps in healing others, she can start to heal all of her own wounds. People have burned her time and time again … but animals don’t judge. Perhaps she could start there. Only … she isn’t a cleric any more, and she’s not in any shape to commit to any gods right now.

Jaheira doesn’t seem surprised, when Shadowheart asks her if she can teach her druidcraft. And when she learns to talk to animals it’s as though a whole new world opens to her. The osprey becomes her friend, as well as other creatures that roam near the castle. Every time Jaheira visits, there is more to learn, and she spends the time in between working hard to master what Jaheira has taught her, with Florwyn’s proud encouragement.

As she works, she begins to come to terms more and more with the darkness she was not only involved in, but actually helped propagate. She wonders what became of the cloister, and who is in charge now. She has a feeling will be XYZ, her former ruthless deputy. And as she works through the things she ordered and was part of as the head of the Baldur’s Gate church, eventually, everything comes back to where it all really started – the decision that changed everything, killing the Nightsong, Selune’s daughter. No apologies she makes can ever take back everything she’s done, everything she’s part of, but she needs to start somewhere.

On a moonlit night, by herself, she tearfully apologises to Selune. And she feels a sense of a mother’s grieving heart understanding the grief she herself feels for her own, fucked up life and everything she’s done. And she feels forgiveness. “Why? How could you? After what I did? What I’ve done?” She asks, weeping. Selune shows her the true memory of what happened the night she was taken which kind of breaks her, but now she knows the truth, and Selune tells her that it is remarkable that she has been able to turn to the light after all that was taken from her, all the brainwashing she was subjected to. Selune, too, is sorry for what happened to her as a child and what she was subjected to since. Selune tells her to find her own path and as a result of the meeting, she is a circle of the moon druid multiclassed with life domain cleric.

There comes a time though, when the sporadic lessons with Jaheira aren’t enough, when Shadowheart needs more. She needs to find what she is capable of, and who she is, and to do that, she will need to go out into the world and leave Florwyn behind for a while, not just slot into Florwyn’s life. It will be a risk to be out in the world, when there will be Sharrans with a grudge, but staying safe and isolated isn’t going to help her grow.

Their farewell lovemaking is desperate, their parting heartwrenching, and Shadowheart leaves the castle and joins Jaheira and the Harpers, so that she can learn “on the job” with Jaheira. It feels good to do some good in the world – she wants to do some good in the world, after all the darkness she once spread. It feels like she’s starting to pay off a debt by putting some good into the world.

But she can’t be known as Shadowheart, out in the world where there are angry Sharrans. Jaheira asks her to pick a new name and she shrugs and says the first name that comes to mind.

“Call me Jenevelle.”

She doesn’t even know where she’s heard the name before, but it has a familiar ring to it.

Gradually she rises through the ranks of the Harpers, gaining respect. She doesn’t see Jaheira as often as time goes by, but when they do there is a fair bit of banter and jokes that she had better not piss off her “mother-in-law.”

For a few years Shadowheart and Florwyn’s relationship is long distance, seeing each other for odd weekends or weeks here and there where their reunions are desperate and intense and buoyant until the inevitable crushing moment of departure. They send each other regular, heartfelt letters, each savouring the arrival of a new letter, and treasuring the letters and rereading them often.

Meanwhile, Shadowheart realises the strange patterns she is seeing in the work the Harpers are undertaking follows a plan that had been devised by her deputy in the cloister that she had shelved. She knows who took over at the cloister after her now.

While she and the Harpers are working to take down the (now illegal) Sharran organisation, Florwyn is reflecting on what she wants in life too. She had been living a life of almost complete solitude for so long, something that Zeera couldn’t handle (hence frequent travels to visit friends), and it obviously isn’t suitable for Shadowheart either. She realises she has become what she has always despised – she’s become a bit like a wizard in an ivory tower but a castle instead. REDACTED.

The castle and its everchanging weather is brilliant for a storm sorcerer, surrounded as she is by an ever-chorus of wind that never leaves her feeling alone, but it’s gloomy and lonely for anyone else. Perfect if she wants to be alone all of her life. But she doesn’t want that, she loves Shadowheart too much. They’ll need to come up with a new dream for life together, if this is going to work.

The letters continue, and Shadowheart is becoming more confident. She can’t change her past, but the future is in her hands, and she’s shaping it herself now.

Shadowheart and the Harpers manage to fight and disband the Sharran organisation, and Shadowheart can only pity her old deputy. She can’t believe she used to be part of all that.

Then one day, Shadowheart receives a letter from Florwyn telling her that Cirrus has died. And something in Shadowheart knows that she is done here now, and it is time to move forward with something new. She and Jaheira, whom she is quite close to by now, talk long into the night.

Florwyn runs out to greet her when she returns home, flinging their arms around each other as Florwyn weeps, Shadowheart feeling rather weepy too, but not just because of the dog. Because Florwyn’s arms are where she belongs now. She feels worthy of Florwyn, and like she can be an equal partner to her now.

Florwn exclaims over Shadowheart’s new hair cut and style, which felt like an important step for Shadowheart in defining the new her, and for a few days they are caught up in the excitement of being together again, of kissing, and holding and making love and all the wonderful little things about each other. It feels like their love has only deepened through their time apart.

Florwyn is of course expecting Shadowheart to leave again soon. But she can see how much more confident, and happy Shadowheart is. She likes these changes in her, she can see that this time she has had has been good for. But it also makes her heart hurt to think that perhaps she is too unexciting for Shadowheart, because she feels deep in her heart that this visit is the end of something, though she doesn’t know what yet.

Then Shadowheart gets up the courage to tell Florwyn that Jaheira has given her a job offer, something different to what she was doing before. Something she would enjoy, and would enable her to keep doing good. But it would mean moving closer to the city … would … is there any chance … would Florwyn come with her?

Florwyn’s tears make Shadowheart think the worst until Florwyn flings her arms around her and says of course my love, anywhere you are is my home. And Florwyn explains she had been thinking much the same sort of thing, and that she’d like to dream anew with Shadowheart, something for both of them. And so they leave the castle behind.

To the small farming community nearby, they know they can go to ‘Jenevelle the healer’ any time – whether for themselves or their livestock. But to Harper trainees, the little wildlife rehabilitation centre she and Florwyn run is a secret training centre for twelve weeks of the year. Here they learn about subterfuge, and spying and all the things that Shadowheart learned as a Sharran that were intended for dark deeds but which she teaches both for good, and so that the Harper trainees can understand the enemies they are up against. Here, also, Shadowheart trains animals as messengers for the Harpers.

Here also the arcanists among the Harpers learn to spot arcane traps and the like from Florwyn. REDACTED.

They go into the city sometimes, to purchase more books of course, but also to visit Alfira’s school. Alfira doesn’t say anything, but she has suspicions about who Florwyn’s druid/healer partner ‘Jenevelle’ might really be.

One day when there are no Harper trainees, and Shadowheart is outside planting vegetables, while her dogs and other animals play around her, a voice calls out in greeting.

It’s a surprise visit from Jaheira, who has become as much a mother to Shadowheart, as she has to Florwyn. For the first time Jaheira doesn’t just seem old, she seems frail. But she is pleased to see Shadowheart. She is ushered excitedly in by both Florwyn and Shadowheart, and eventually, after the initial catch ups, Jaheira gives them her news. She is retiring from the Harpers – for good this time.

She is proud, so proud of them both. Her stay with them is short, but somehow, it feels like she is saying goodbye without saying goodbye, as she hints that there is only one last great adventure for her now, and it’s nearly time.

They are both try not to weep and cling to her when she leaves, but she puts up with them. But she seems excited for a new adventure again, something completely different. It is clear from the way she talks that she is looking forward to being reunited with Khalid.

Things would have gone very different for both of them, if not for Jaheira. Two orphans who were lucky enough to have someone take them under their wing and give them a guiding hand and a bit of love. Is that something they would want to do for others one day, too? Something to think about …

Holly, their silly Irish setter bunts her head into them, wanting a pat, breaking the moment. And then Shadowheart takes Florwyn’s hand, and says, “come on, love. Let’s go inside.”

They are both home. Because home will always be with each other. But perhaps, there could be room for more, in the home of love they’ve built.

Once again it is the end of something. But perhaps, it could be a start to something else, too.

* * * * * *

For the record I felt very teary when it came to saying that Florwyn and Shadowheart were having time apart, and I straight up started crying at the Jaheira bit at the end.

If you have guessed the parts that are redacted, I'd appreciate if you could keep them to yourself and out of the comments for the moment so that it will hopefully be a surprise for readers of Shadowheart Begins when the reveal comes. :) (I have no intention of revealing or confirming in advance what it is).

[camile-leon]

sanders sides

hello the special interest brain rot has hit once more and I’m writing it here because :)

okay so currently for characterizations:

Red “Roman”: Fanciful/Dreams/Passionate Side, However I feel is growing to be more representative of or taking more responsibility for C!Thomas’s Motivations. Presides over Left Arm, Brainstorm Mode, and Summons things very easily. Has a sword. One of the Primary Sides and Colors. Prince of the Imagination. Insecure and working on it. (?) Arc in progress.

Orange “REDACTED”: theorized to be Wrath or some form of Rage, based off of all of the ostrich sized Easter eggs. *See the “See/Speak/Hear” theory below*. Previously seen as the orange fruit (Thomas doesn’t like fruit? 🤔), and possessing Logan’s Eyes as he finished ranting his arc motivations to remus. Notable uses of the color include as text in the SvS redux game, saying “hello” using *upside down calculator* (👀) speak.

Yellow “Janus”: Deceit/Self-Preservation, and recently accepted, or, at the least working hand in hand with patton. Can silence/repress any of the sides, disguise self as any of the sides, and also can summon things when inside the mindscape. Has a shepherds cane. I feel like has a strong or at the least secure ego after being resisted on the mere basis of his presence alone and continuing to offer arguments without giving up. He responded after Roman made fun of his name yes, but like that was fair, and even though it hurt, it did give insight on how much Janus knows about Romans insecurity. Primary color.

Green “Remus”: Intrusive Thoughts, and by extension repressed thoughts?? Can conjure out of the mindscape, cast shadows over vision(?), allergic to soap. Carries a Mace. Duke of the Imagination. Chaos incarnate and ego doesn’t GAF. My theory is, because of the unique connection to repressed thoughts, he can bring out the repressed sides when out of Thomas’s direct consciousness’s “line of sight”. Maybe teams up with Janus for that ability? Idk.

Navy Blue (Dark Blue) “Logan”: Logical Thinking/Rational Thoughts/Local Librarian. Has incredible memory recall and database. Carries or Conjures Flashcards. One of the Primary Sides and Colors. Only side to not reveal own name. Closest contact with the orange side. Wants to use the chemistry degree. Mid Arc. Secure Ego is struggling because of arc.

Light Blue (Cyan) “Patton”: Morality/ the Feelings(??). Head honcho like Joy in Inside Out. Can use Nostalgic/Sensory memory. Can turn into a giant frog when overwhelmed? Possibly a primary color? one of the primary sides. Unstable ego/sense of Thomas’s self.

Purple “Virgil”: previously black color. Anxiety/Fight or Flight. Increases anxiety levels in whoever, eyeshadow levels indicate anxiety, can magnify and multiply voice, can also make things darker. Has built a more secure ego, but is still defensive at times. Pet spider. Theory is that paranoia is old version? Future version? Coexisting part that needs stability which makes sense.

color theory:

complimentary colors- the characters at odds to each other. Red green/Yellow Purple/blue orange. the first two groups don’t like each other like at all. HOWEVER, i think Logan and tangerine would work together??

also, Primary Colors- I think Janus, Logan, and a form of creativity(?) are the oldest. I think it took time before orange, patton, and Virgil were developed. But! I think the creative split happened latest, with remus and Roman being youngest in the group unless patton is cyan in which case I think that uses green so then patton is youngest which is SO FUNNY.

see, hear, speak: ???

Janus= can hide other sides entirely, can silence other sides entirely, I don’t think effects ears directly

Remus= can make other sides quieter? (Could also be just movie making and focus), can make the screen black, I don’t think effects other sides mouths directly.

virgil= can make voice louder/multiply, can make the screen black, I don’t think effects ears directly

orange= effects eyes “blinded with rage”, I don’t know anything else ʅ（◞‿◟）ʃ

now you may be asking why is a primary color getting the perks of the secondary colors?? I don’t know. It’s a darkside thing?? I Guess?? Catholicism!

I love psycho analyzing my faves <3

and this concludes my note to self theory notes.

thank you Thomas sanders for my favorite special interest, giving my therapist an in to understanding/communicating with my brain, and for still sharing all of the fun you bring to content in such a wide variety.

it’s very weird and para social but I would love to give you a hug one day, and to share the PowerPoint I made in middle school as a leadership project based off of you and the sides (of which I saved the very enthusiastic and uninhabited script of a first special interest). I aspire to remain even half as busy as all of your projects. Absolute wildest dreams would be to work with you on a creative project.

does anyone know where to send fanmail? Is it just Twitter?

[normal-internet-user]

Friendling!!! First off, *offers bouquet* and secondly, my (redacted) was PANICKINGGGGGG but then I got a hold of myself and that's why I'm here now.

I had the Saddest Thoughts™ about the Disaster Triplets, yeah? I had the fluff/crack train going!! I promise I did but then while we were running through the meadows of peace Angst clotheslined me and choke-slammed me into the soil.

Here's what they left me with! Remember when Shelldon essentially got destroyed? Around the end of S2, I believe; noted, I haven't watched S2 but I've seen clips plus some tidbits and stuff through here and I've come to the knowledge that Shelldon did indeed get ... well, deconstructed. 😔

And this is also very much inspired by a TikTok I came across a while ago!! To cut clear, it was a comic strip/fanart video of Donnie's reaction to his brothers breaking the news to him. Of how Shelldon got caught in the crossfire and... didn't make it. :(((

Broke my heart, truly it did. But then I scrolled through the comments and one mentioned how angsty it would be if Donnie found out that Leo's the one who told Shelly to protect Karai (?? I think! Like I said, haven't watched it 😅)

And. It had me thinking.

Angst scenario. So, so angsty. Much hurt. The boys break the news to Donnie. Donnie, of course, devastated. Probably goes into denial for a bit until the evidence is presented right in front of him. But then, Donnie finds out that Leo's the one who told Shelldon to stay behind. (THIS BROKE MY HEART TOOO LIKE MY POOR BLUEBERRY HE DIDN'T KNAUR)

Can you imagine how Donnie would feel? How utterly heartbroken, nay, betrayed he'd probably feel? The heartbreak would be shattering. Then, past the shock, the anger would filter through.

Donnie and Leo are twins. In this case scenario, Donnie and Leo and you are triplets. You're the one who'd be closer to Donnie, hands up in a placating gesture despite feeling extremely delicate yourself. You were so sorry. You were so, so sorry Donnie.

It's okay. It'll all be okay. Just, just don't —

You're probably the one to separate your twins from each other. I can't figure out how Donnie would react precisely; whether he'd become violent or turn terrifyingly cold. Would Leo approach his brother, feeling a rush of emotions just as strongly upfront and reaches forward for both, repentance and reassurance? Or would he shrink back under Donnie's gaze, shoulders hunched over to protect himself from forces unseen, his own realization catching up to him. It was... his fault? Him? No.. no, no it couldn't be. Shelldon was like a son to Donnie — practically was his son. And Leo had...

I don't know how they'd completely react, but I do have an idea of how Reader would. Or rather, completely my headcanon ping-pong tournament. 🤩

I know you'd be caught in the middle. (Someone said Donnie wouldn't talk to Leo for months and it was my 13th reason, basically-) You'd feel so strung between your brothers. Caught between placating Donnie, who becomes even more withdrawn and has an edge to himself that he never did before.

Leo? Leo's... terrified. Leo's so, so sad. Leo's depressed and he doesn't know how to cope and he wishes things didn't happen the way they did but it did and he just wants his brother back. He's still the face man, and his coping skills are still crap. But he's not making as many jokes, his smile is glass, his eyebags are horrendous underneath his mask, which is streaked and stained with tears he cried in the privacy of his room. You should know. You'd walked in multiple times.

The first couple of times, you'd left at his beckoning. The next, you strode right in and pulled him into your arms. He didn't say much outside of a territorial growl and chirrup (an insult to you, really) embracing his animalistic nature for a spell and pushed at your shoulders. But then you wrenched him back and straight up snarled in his face, snout-to-snout, and he broke.

He fully expected you to storm out, maybe spit in his face (get this man some therapy pls), treat him with the hatred he believed he deserved. You called him a dumb-dumb, tone biting in the quiet of the night, and crushed him against you in a hug that washed over him entirely.

He'd begged you not to hate him too in the shelter of your neck. He clung to you, shaking, apologies spilling out from the depths of his broken heart, whimpers and chirps and words slurring together.

You were a rock. Leo's used to you being so soft and warm, and over the time he had pushed you away, you grew cold. He'd misread the situation entirely (you had never left him, you were just waiting.) You didn't hate him, he comes to realize. It's a salve to his entire being. You nuzzle his shoulder, pet down his head and shell, press small caring kisses to his temple, assuring him that the bond between you all could never be broken. The world's big. This family is bigger. The love between you all transcends dimensions. It may seem small and suffocating right now, but it will all turn out to be okay.

And you weren't going anywhere. This is another obstacle- like the skate ramps when they first started out! It seemed big and scary then, hm? But then they conquered it, and now it's his favorite thing in the world. It's one of their favorite things in the entire world.

This is just another obstacle, you murmur as you press your forehead to his. Something you always do to calm either of your siblings down. Leo clung to you as you both settled and cuddled in his bed, and you held him close. Your brother. The color purple flashed through either of you guy's minds, and while it was an obstacle to overcome, you knew you'd all conquer it.

This wasn't like skateboarding at all — but the blueprint wasn't too far off. It'd just take time. This was a very delicate situation, and that's how you would handle it.

You squeeze Leo closer, let him cry it all out until he falls asleep. You'd get through this. Through the winding obstacle of thorns, you'd all get through this. But it was okay to not be okay, and you all were not okay right now.

One thing was for damn sure, and that was that you wouldn't give up on your family.

(The happy part of this is that once all's said and done, Donnie of course rebuilds him in the future because I said so and emailed so and texted so. I'm so spoiled by the au's and fanart on here of amazing artists and such giving Shelldon and Don-Bon their happy ending!! Also. Son™.)

You have RUINED me but I have been plauged by the thoughts... the thoughts...

CONFLICT

◇~~◇~~◇~~◇~~◇

Summary: Being stuck in the middle of a conflict is never easy. Especially when it's family. Especially when it's your twins.

Warnings: Angsty angsty angsty

Requested:

GN Reader!

....................................

How had things ended up this way? Your home was destroyed, your family was in shambles, and the relationship you held so tightly between you and your brothers was crumbling too fast to fix.

"That's not funny." Donnie had deadpanned when he'd first heard the news of Shelldon, "That is not a funny joke in any capacity."

"It's not a joke, Dee." You muttered, easing your hand onto his shoulder, "Shelly's... he's gone.. He's gone."

"That's not... it can't be.."

"Donnie..."

"He was supposed to be out of the way! How is he- He was out of the way!" Donnie shouts, his entire body tenses with an emotion he doesn't know how to express in the moment.

Leo however, seems to making himself smaller and smaller with every word from his brothers mouth, and the ever observant eyes of Donatello notice.

"Leonardo, what. did. you. do?" He asks lowly, shoving you away and stomping closer to Leo, glaring daggers.

"I told him to protect Gram-Gram. I didn't think he'd.. I didn't think this would happen!" Leo defends, trying to back away from Donnie, not daring to look his brother in the eyes.

"You... Shelldon..." Donnie seemed unable to put his thoughts into words, he balled his hands into fists, and you quickly stepped forward to put yourself between them.

"Donnie..." Leo started but Donnie shoved him away, causing Leo to fall back onto the ground.

"No, shut up, Leo! You... you .. Stay away from me! Don't you dare-" Donnie snarls, and you move to stand infront of him, your heart was pumping and tears pricked at your eyes.

"Donnie... please calm down.." you begged.

"Don't." Donnie mumbles, slowly backing up, "Don't." Then he ran off to some unknown hideaway, Mikey went to charge after him, but Raph caught his arm.

"Give him a minute. He'll... he'll come around." He muttered.

God if only he'd been right.

The hours turned to days, the days to weeks, and the weeks to months.

It was tearing you apart having to play the middle man, Donnie refused to even look at Leo, and Leo was heartbroken.

He never said so. But you could tell.

It felt like a thick fog was filling your lungs ans suffocating you slowly, you missed how close the three of you were.

You were triplets, the dynamic trio, the three musketeers- now it felt more like you were strangers, and you didn't know what to do.

The guilt was eating away at Leo, and Donnie spent most of his time cooped up and refusing to speak to anyone.

You quietly entered Leo's room, and he glanced up at you, but looked away quickly. At least he didn't tell you to go away..

You sat next to him, and he leaned over so his head was resting on your shoulder. Nothing was said, but no words were needed.

He just needed someone there so he wasn't alone, but you both knew he'd never ask for help. He didn't need too. You knew.

You rested your head atop his, the two of you sitting in silent comfort with the other. Time.

Fixing this was going to take so much time. But you were willing to take the time to fix it. You needed too...

....................................

Part two...? 👀 Maybe. Most likely. Hehehehe

I literally read this at like 2am last night and passed out right after. THE THOUGHTS PLAUGED MY DREAMS.

[aimedis]

redacted characters as things in my journal 🎀

relatively big tw - there's like vague to explicit mentions of su!cid3 and heavily implied mental self-esteem struggles in this one (i'm alright at the moment, promise) so if that's triggering to you, don't read. this is kinda heavy and maybe disturbing to read to some people i think.

i decided to do this because i though it was kinda fun and cool to like analyse my stuff and the characters a little bit. sorry if this offends anyone ig? idk 😭 i'll be back with the more lighthearted stuff in a couple days okay let's go ->

darlin: "my feelings aren't in my control most of the time. i don't know why i feel this way."

angel before they broke up with micheal: "i think is funny (but i also feel bad) that he's always talking about "getting married" and "forever" when i have a break up letter sitting in my notes."

freelancer: lyrics to "making the bed - olivia rodirgo"

darlin: "i don't wanna talk about him anymore."

damien: "i just want my mom. and i wish i could go up to her just bawling my fucking eyes out like i'm five-years-old without feeling like a fucking failure but i can't... i've survived long enough and i can do it some more."

darlin before sam: "and a part of me will always miss what once was or could have been. but i know they will never be long term, permanent, or reality. i wasn't created to have a happy ending... but i'm okay with this. it makes it easier to slip away and disappear."

cutie: i don't know what so say really. i just feel empty and alone often. i feel out of place. i feel like everything i do is humiliating or straight up wrong. i don't know what's wrong with me."

gavin: "try as i might, i still feel like i am not in my body. living vicariously... through myself?"

baabe: "i should know. my dad didn't want me enough to stay."

lasko: "man what a fucking baby. stop crying over shit that hasn't even happened."

damien before huxley: "i wish i was dead. do you think if [mom] knew she'd wish that too?" (knew that he was gay)

lovely: lyrics to "strangers - ethel cain"

darlin: "i hope it's not my fault when it's all over. i want one thing to not be my fault. but it probably will be."

angel: "why am i crying. again. over and over and over again. it's all i ever do. cry about this or cry about that."

milo post-inversion: "this hurts a lot more than i thought. the thought of feeling like this forever? it sucks."

freelancer: "fucking kill me. i can't breathe."

sam: "is it wrong to think i don't deserve this or that it's not my fault?"

lasko: "it feels like i'm always apologizing."

david: "it really hurts when i need to talk to [him] so bad but i can't."

huxley post-inversion/xavier's death: "is it just always going to feel like this? holy shit this hurts."

damien: "i'm sorry, mom, i'm sorry."

vincent: "the real me? i don't know who that is anymore."

angel: "one more or one less, nobody's worried. my tummy hurts."

darlin before sam: "i don't plan on feeling like this again. i don't plan on "being in love" ever again. as if i know what that feels like... it makes me feel like shit all the time."

cutie: "after this, i'll go back to being alone. like god intended."

asset: "it's kind of sad how i don't even feel like a person sometimes."

lovely: "every so often it hurts so much i think it's gonna rip me apart from the inside."

asher post-inversion: "and it's like, sometimes it straight up feels like i'm gonna die in that moment."

sweetheart: "my greatest sin to men was being a child."

damien: lyrics to "forwards beckon rebound - adrianne lenker"

[doberbutts]

The other thing I liked about Being Human (US) is that the core cast are all incredibly flawed and damaged people who still love each other at their core and genuinely want things to work even though they make spectacularly stupid choices at times along the way.

Aiden is incredibly easy to trigger due to his laundry list of past and present issues and when he's triggered he doesn't shut down or go quiet. He gets ANGRY. He gets *violent*. There was a joke between my friend and I when we watched over the summer and holidays that he was a big fan of using neck snaps to solve his problems but was startlingly bad at dealing with the fallout except by continuing to kill people to cover up his problems. When he fights with Josh he gets personal, he's so combative and confrontational, and he wears that prickly exterior whenever someone sees through the stone mask and pokes at a fleshy bit a little too hard.

But we also see Aiden break down and cry. We see him sobbing uncontrollably as he loses control again and again and again. Every time he manages to scrape together a bit of happiness before either he or someone else fucks it all up and it blows up in his face. He wants to stop. He doesn't want to hurt people anymore. And he can't figure out how to do it because it's like hurting people and driving them away or killing them is the only thing he really knows how to do.

So many times while watching I would yell "talk to your fucking friends asshole" and he would continue to either shut them out or get close but lose his nerve halfway through and remain silent. He wanted that connection very badly and simply couldn't make it happen. The few times he did open up to Josh or Sally he was well received, which I think was really a bright point in the writing because it showed the audience that the problem was that Aiden couldn't figure out how to be vulnerable due to [redacted plot things] rather than because his friends were jerks.

And overall I think that balanced well with Sally, who's various exploits *also* usually blew up in her face, and Josh, who oscillates wildly between "sad and more than a little afraid of himself" and "picks weird hills to die on because it's literally the only way he manages to feel any amount of control in his life". Josh and Sally both frequently vent about things to Aiden, but he almost never reciprocated until pretty close to the end of the series. He hides things from them, he dodges questions, he finds convenient excuses to not talk about stuff, even when they prod and pry to get something out of him.

He only explains after things hit the fan and everything goes to shit. Usually, because his friends have been there to catch him when he falls, and he has to tell them *something* about why there's so much blood on his hands (sometimes literally) yet again. And they get mad at him, but ultimately they forgive him, because fuck, a werewolf and a ghost aren't really in any place to judge now are they. Even then, it's not usually the whole truth.

(And it's interesting, in the what-if scenario where they weren't there to catch him as he fell, just how bad things got)

But then he's afraid he's going to lose Josh, and he's afraid he's going to lose Sally, and he's afraid he's going to die, and he goes to Josh, and he says "I'm scared, and I don't know what to do".

And Josh stops, and realizes that Aiden has never asked him for help, not really, and has never actually been vulnerable with him, and has always worn the brave and stoic face even as things are melting down at catastrophic levels. And he says, I'm here.

Aiden is such a bad victim and he makes some real stinkers of bad choices along the way but they make sense for his character once you learn about all the shit that's happened since he became a vampire and how fucked up things got for him before he realized he needed out. And he backslides and he backslides and he backslides but he keeps trying because what's the point if he doesn't at least try.

Anyway the hill I will die on is that this show would have done numbers on tumblr if it came out slightly later. Ah well.

[inoreuct]

HEHEHEH ASK AND I SHALL DELIVERRR

It too a while for the crew to get used to Zoro just… head butting them. Not even just in his Tiger form, his human form as well. He would randomly walk up to someone, and aggressively shoulder or nudge someone with his head (as cats are prone to do). It was quite startling the first time it happened, and Nami was the first. Let’s just say, if everyone wasn’t already awake, they sure as hell would be with Nami’s scream.

Once Chopper got used to being arOUND A PREDATOR, the two quickly bonded over their shared experiences of social isolation due to their species. It got to the point where their bond was so close, it could be equated to a father/son relationship.

He does actually communicate a lot. Just in sounds. At a pitch humans can’t hear. It’s one of the few things he’s oblivious to; Zoro just assumes everyone hears and doesn’t care.

Zoro’s social perception? Outstanding. He can analyse a situation down to the tiniest detail, and reads the room by like a boss. His bedside manner, though, could do with some work. He is so blunt, it’s physically painful to experience.

They had to install a dust bath for him, and they realised it got the blood off of both his and Choppers fur far easier than a bath would.

For reasons that should be obvious, they then had to install an air shower.

Zoro loves eyeshadow, and is surprisingly good with makeup. Robin and Nami often let him do them up if they have to go anything important

He and Sanji have become the ships stylists. Maybe this is because no one wants to say no to the massive green tiger and his boyfriend, although they are admittedly good

Zoro (in Tiger form) can’t get through quite a lot of doorways, as he is BLOODY MASSIVE. 6ft at the shoulder, he isn’t exactly small

Perona’s shovel talk for the crew (“if any of you dare hurt my baby brother, I will [redacted]”) when Zoro joined was… quite the spectacle. Mihawk almost laughed, while Usopp almost wet himself.

Mihawk adopted both Zoro and Perona, as they are both Tiger shifters like him. He didn’t want them going through what he did (Zoro was adopted shortly after Kuina’s death).

Mihawk can shift into a melanistic tiger with an almost lion like mane, that is slightly smaller than Zoro. Perona can shift into a much smaller, hot pink tiger (with white stripes, for some reason). Although she is smaller than her brother and father, she is still much larger than a normal tiger. The three of them all have the same yellow eyes with the black rings (Mihawk just doesn’t bother hide it in his human form)

Zoro can and will tear things apart with his teeth, even in human form. It was… quite disconcerting when he ripped out someone’s throat in front of everyone for the first time

And even worse when he lost control of his instincts, and attempted to full on eat someone. It wasn’t technically cannibalism, but the crew was still quite uncomfortable being alone around him for a while after that

Desires affection. Do not give him affection. He will make you give it to him anyways.

Sanji can’t say no to this man. Not even for romantic reasons, Zoro just has very good puppy dog (kitty cat?) eyes

THAT IS SO CUTE. i know exactly what you mean, and nami probably thought he was picking a fight at first until he walked away and she was like ????$38;?;?//(353 and then he turns back like “…what 😐”  he’s not very tactile unless someone else initiates so this is def what he does to show affection 

I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT THIS zoro’s his father at this point. they probably communicate without words and it creeps the rest of the crew out a little but it’s their thing

on that note. he definitely communicates but it’s all subsonic; he probably growls something at sanji while they’re at a stakeout and the cook still moves to go forward and zoro has to scruff him by the collar like “what did i JUST say. i told you there was danger—” and sanji’s like “you didn’t say anything???” 

his compartmentalisation is bonkers good. he rarely forgets things, if ever, and he’s very very tactical; but yeah, he does not pull his punches. no tact whatsoever. if you look ugly he’s gonna tell you straight to your face and then send you off to sanji for help. 

THIS IS SO FUNNY BCS THEY WOULD ESSENTIALLY HAVE TO BUILD HIM A SANDPIT. IMAGINE “oh yeah we just had a sandpit built for our tiger on board”. the strawhats baffle people on a regular basis and enjoy it immensely.

the first time they used the dust bath they were quarantined there until franky finessed a vacuum into a makeshift air shower. sanji was Not about to get bathing sand in his expensive shoes. 

OH THE INCREASED AGILITY DEFINITELY PLAYS INTO THIS he has really steady hands and coupled with sanji letting zoro practice on him? the girls trust him implicitly. HE PROBABLY KNOWS HOW TO BRAID TOO BECAUSE PERONA MADE HIM LEARN

oh please sanji is a fashion diva. look at him. he knows how to dress all of them to emphasise their best features. he commissions formal attire for the whole crew. the strawhats will never be caught slacking or not slaying. AND SANJI CUTS THEIR HAIR TOO

oh my goodness what if for whatever reason his muscle mass didn’t translate? like at the beginning, he hadn’t shifted for so long that in tiger form his physique deteriorated and they all think he wouldn’t be able to fit through the doorway but it’s all just fur. after that sanji made it his personal mission to make sure zoro was hanging around in his shifted form more and also made sure to kept him fed AND NOW HE’S BULKED UP AND GETS STUCK ALL THE TIME but they really can’t be mad about it because it’s better than when he was borderline malnourished

usopp PLEAse just don’t yank on his tail and you’ll be FINE. mihawk was secretly so proud of perona you can’t tell me he wasn’t

ADOPTIVE DAD MIHAWK MAKES A REAPPEARANCE!! YES!! also,,, how common are we making tiger shifters,,, bcs what if they’re actually pretty rare and he finds these two cubs on their own and he’s like ok. i dont care you’re My kids now

they’re such a terrifying family. they’re all menaces. zoro and perona take after mihawk in their own ways but they’re all horrible i love them

it probably happened because luffy or sanji was in danger. he didn’t think, just lunged, and he knows the crew’s startled but at least they’re all okay so he doesn’t regret it

…now THIS one he regrets. kinda want to write a drabble for this bcs the angst potential is DELICIOUS. i haven’t angsted zoro nearly enough yet hehehehehehe 

he’s so touch-starved my GOD. he wants attention? ear scratches? belly rubs? he headbutts you with a VENGEANCE and almost bowls you over. thats how he makes sure to get your attention. he’s so silly 

OOOH THIS ONE he gives sanji the big eyes and the gentle headbutt and a quiet “mrrp” and sanji is GONE.

i am eating this UP anon. he’s the literal definition of a danger kitty i love him