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cassandracain52 · 4 months

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Reverse trope

where instead of the Bats forgetting that they’re adopted (something actual adoptees do on occasion and is hilarious) they forget that some of them *cough Damian cough* aren’t

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Jason in the heat of a probably ridiculous argument: Yeah well YOU’RE adopted!

Tim just as invested in said argument: So are YOU! We all are!

Damian who had previously been quietly watching this unfold while he drank his tea: Actually I’m not

Tim and Jason who didn’t realize he was there but are already DoneTM: …… Damian continuing to sip his tea entirely unbothered: :)

Damian: Because I’m not an orphan-

Jason: ok, yoU KNOW WHAT-

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or like in their group texts (that we know they have thanks to Nightwing (2016) #79)

*Steph changed the group chat name to “Bruce Wayne’s Personal Orpanage”*

Jason: Really?

Steph: ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Steph: It’s the truth Damian: Both my parents are very much alive

Steph: Shhh you don’t count

Cass: Mine too Duke: Technically so are mine

Barbara: I still have a dad so there’s that

Steph: YOU GUYS ARE RUINING THE JOKE

Tim: Stephanie aren’t BOTH of your parents alive???

Steph: KNOW WHAT? FINE

*Steph changed the group chat name to “The Technicality Police”*

Tim: well that’s more accurate at least

Steph: :)

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Damian in his 10th argument with Tim of the day: That’s- this is-

Tim in full Antagonizing Big Brother mode: I’m listening

Damian -a Gen Z and best friend to Jon Kent- extremely frustrated: This is such Motherless behavior!

Tim taken aback: [voice cracking] W-what-?

Damian who didn’t mean to say that but doubling down anyway because his bloodline doesn’t believe in admitting mistakes: THIS! This is such Motherless behavior!

The rest of the family who is also motherless: :O

Cass whose been spending way too much time with Meme Queen Stephanie Brown and not involved in the argument but finding it entertaining regardless: [nodding along seriously] Facts

Tim: [visibly betrayed] CASS WHAT-

A video copy of the interaction gets sent out anonymously to the entire family. Barbara is the prime suspect but there is no proof as of yet (and they will never find any)

Steph, Cass, and Duke continue to respond “Motherless behavior” everytime one of the bats does something they deem questionable/insane. It is said often

It only stops when one night in the middle of patrol. Batman is in full Dark Knight mode (possibly in the middle of threatening someone) and descends from the ceiling into the middle of a warehouse drug deal, dark cape billowing out behind him-

and Steph just automatically whispers “Motherless behavior” forgetting her com was still very much on

She immediately realizes what she said and frantically apologizes but it’s too late.

Bruce just- Blue Screens. Completely stunned into silence

Dick -who was unfortunate enough to be the one teamed up with Batman tonight- is fighting for his life to choke back his laughter

Jason doesn’t even try to stop his and has collapsed to his knees from lack of air from how hard he’s laughing. Cass try’s half heartedly patting his back to help to no avail

The criminals are terrified into surrender from The Red Hood just laughing hysterically at seemingly nothing while Batman just Stands There

Damian ends up being the only one still functioning enough to continue arresting everyone, though he is privately amused and strangely proud

Tim and Barbara have saved both the com recordings and cowl footage to at least three different servers and sent it to absolutely everyone before Batman even recovers

Duke finds out second hand the next morning and is furious he missed the chance to see it in person. He declares he is moving to the nightshift so it doesn’t happen again. (He is all talk and goes to bed by 9 pm)

Bruce bans the phrase for life and promises swift and server punishment to anyone who dares to use it again

#Like it’d be so funny #Imagine them on mothers day #Damian at unnecessary volumes: I AM LEAVING TO GO TO VISIT MY MOTHER NOW #Damian: WHERE SHE LIVES.#His brothers on their way to the cemetery or smth: ._.#Damian still going regardless: BECAUSE SHE IS ALIVE #I just know Damian “Certified Mama’s Boy” Wayne would be such a menace about it #And Duke Babs Steph and Cass would so help fan the flames #batfam #dc comics #fanfiction #headcanon #chat fic #Can you tell I read them often #And yes adoptees forget they’re adopted #I have a friend who has on multiple occasions started to tell me about something that “ran in the family”/something in her family history #Before she’ll remember she’s not actually blood related #someone has probably already done this #But I still thinks it’s very funny #No I don’t think Jon would say motherless behavior to someone #But I do think he’d know the phrase and teach Damian #I just imagine he educates him on all the Gen Z lingo don’t ask why #crack post #100% a joke dont take it seriously

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sage-nebula · 4 months

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I loved the new IDW Sonic issue! Too bad I know without looking that people are going to be stupid and awful about Lanolin 🫠

#i can already hear it now #''she was a bitch to jet she was acting like the fun police to him''#''she was a bitch to sonic (& tails & amy) by telling them to get off the road before they got run over by oncoming traffic''#was she mean in that second case? yeah her delivery was harsh. but was she also correct? yes #pedestrians shouldn't be on the road & vehicle racetracks count as roads #and the middle of a race isn't the time for a race ref to see if you're OK. just bc Tangle doesn't take her job seriously literally ever #doesn't mean that Lanolin doesn't. doesn't mean Lanolin was wrong in telling Team Sonic to get tf off the racetrack #when they were rendered pedestrians #but we know this fandom can't be normal abt women & esp not Lanolin so. i'm not even going to look at the tag #i know you all can't be trusted. smdh #''we want more nuanced female characters'' y'all can't even handle a sleep deprived sheep for fucksake #ETA: okay Tangle does take her job seriously SOMETIMES. on rare occasions #she was serious in the latter half of Tangle & Whisper as well as Metal Virus and latter half of Urban Warfare #but v often she doesn't take things seriously. here she def wasn't with being all OMG HI GUYS!!!!!!!!! mid race #i love her but girl come on. focus.

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bull-shit-suji · 1 year

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awoke in the dead of night with a visceral need to redraw this panel

#i do not know the context but its so funny to me #grelle after the top surgery #like i was lying in bed staring at the ceiling thinking of her #rare occasion of posting my own art #kuroshitsuji #black butler #grelle sutcliffe #grell sutcliff #sebastian michaelis #tentatively sebagrelle #art #grell truthers come get ur food #cant tell if shes sitting on top of him of not so i elected to just. not do that

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starsnumber1charliefan · 5 months

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How dare you 😡

Exer is pointy

Not NO.

It's yes, stars.

Get it right

;)

british scum

#/hj #exer being pointy is my only weakness #also i assume a lobotomy #oh yeah i forgot to tell people so ill js say in the comments #so like #at school last week #my class was taking a walk #and i was w my friend #and we were farrrrr behind so we ran #and then we stopped bc we had cramps #and she was like “my side aches so much” and i pretended to punch it #and she was like “actually punch it”#and i did #HOLY ME #IT HURT SO SO SO BAD #i actually broke one of my fingers bc of it #turns out #she has scoliosis #and she was wearing this brace #to help fix her back???#idk #anyways i am a damaged person #send help before i punch someone elses back brace or fake leg or glass eye or whatever #once i got hit by a car #AND #ON A DIFFERENT OCCASION #A SQUIRREL CHASED ME FOR LIKE 10 MINUTES AFTER I CALLED IT BABYGIRL #THAT WASNT EVEN THE FIRST TIME #once i called one “radical jim” and he chased me for a few minutes #jackson's diary

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littleplantfreak · 8 days

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ok trying to go to sleep for real this time

#mari says #if you see me posting…u can yell at me #idk how people have normal sleep schedules tbh i need to do that one where you sleep for 4 and ur awake for a bit and then sleep another 4 #its not realistic tho #also almost made a post abt how much i want ume to babytrap me so i do certainly think that’s enough for one night/day #oh dilf ume fic w dubcon mino wrote that one time…we’re really in it now #it wasnt babytrapping technically but lord help me i go back to it on occasion and im like what if…#i love mino dont tell her tho

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widevibratobitch · 2 months

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(not quite logging back in just venting dont mind me <3 ill reply to everyone later mwah)

#i guess the worst thing about allllllll the times my mother tells me im crazy is that i know she's right lol #like the instant overwhelming need to sh whenever she says it or in fact every time we fight should be enough to confirm it 🤡#like i legit wont calm down until i physically hurt myself preferably also drawing blood. this is not Sane Person Behaviour #anyway whatsapp just spent a few minutes crying curled up on the floor in the kitchen pulling my own hair trying to ✨Not SH✨#because its stupid idiot motherfucking summer and everyone will See #and ended up doing it regardless lol #and its so funny cause like literally the moment i do it im perfectly fine and mentally and emotionally stable again 🥰😇#anyway i love my mom she's great but she did ruin my entire life and me as a person too #and basically all my adult problems can be easily traced back to my psychological nightmare of a childhood #except i cant blame her for that either because she didnt have it easy and she raised me on her own (and unmedicated too)#while my dad didnt really even get many occasions to ruin me on a fundamental level (like he sure did use those few chances he had but yknow #not nearly as many as my mom got)#so i cant just blame my mom and let feminism lose like that #anyway. she should never have had children and i there's nothing i regret more than her husband dying instead of me #ok logging back off byeeeeeeeeee

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empress-hancock · 1 year

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Oh this is hysterical

#i am addicted to zoro slander it’s so unfortunate it is the least common slander in the whole fandom #this man is a doofus he’s a moron he sits on his ass while nami shovels the snow off the deck and sleeps while she busts her ass #he’s a dick and he picks on others and then laughs when they tell him to stop bullying him #(source: in punk hazard he did this to brook. brook literally said ‘stop bullying me’)#he insinuated that robin should not have been fought by a foe at full strength because ‘she’s a woman’#actually insinuated isn’t right. he straight up said it #i know people think sanji thinks women are weak and that’s why he doesn’t hit them or saves the girls but #he saves EVERYONE. and does it not because he thinks anyone is weak #(he has on numerous occasions praised nami and robin’s strenth. and he has trusted them both to save HIM when he needed it)#he saves others because he doesn’t want to see his friends hurt. that’s it. he is the kindest of the crew. having turned multiple foes into #allies just by being nice #oh but anyway. the reason he doesn’t hit women is because Zeff threatened to castrate him if he ever did #so… saying that to a child has an impact #and if Sanji is so scared of disappointing zeff that he wouldn’t let SOMEONE ELSE kill his physically and mentally abusive family #then he probably isn’t going to disobey him on the women thing #it’s probably not even abt the castration anymore he just has fucking stockholm syndrome #zeff was abusive too but i think he’s desperate for a father and doesn’t want to let him down #he and Usopp have Issues with admiring terrible dads #anyway

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skrunksthatwunk · 8 months

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FINISHED GAIDEN

#rgg gaiden spoilers in tags #GUH. SNIFF. GUH. BUHHHHBUHBUH. FUCK #!!!!! EUGHHHUGHHH #WHY DID NO ONE TELL ME GAIDEN WAS GOOOODDDDDDDDDD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!#AUUGGUHEHGEHHVBBBBGHHG #SOBBINGNH BAWLING THROWING UP SHUDDERING SNIFFLING LIMP DREADFUL UGHHGHUUHH #EUGHHHHHHHHHGYUGHHHHHGGH #SORRY I WAS GONNA REFLECT BUT I CANT STOP TEXT GROANING LIKE. HYUGHHHGGGHHH GUHHHHHH #SOBBING INTERNALLY REALLY REALLY HARD RN...#it was such a good final sequence... like the whole final fight was so good #AND UFHGEYHG EVERYONES REACTIONS TO KIRYU COMING BACK.. AND HIS TO THEM ...#majima veing like yeah ywah ok sure thing joryu just. just don't run off too soon arright? GUHHHHHBWAUUUUHHHGGUUGUUHHBBBHHHHHHHHNNGGGHHHH #WET PILE ON THE FLOOR #and it's such a good final fight and final occasion for what's probably gonna be kiryu's final solo finale yknow?#captured the spirits of the others while getting the emotion and the hype in a way i havent felt with the past couple antags #yumi ring post credit sequence..... awhhhh 🥺🥺🥺 ...... he loves her.....🤧🤧🤧#GYUGJH so glad to see rgg finally remembering yumi oughhguhhh and theres at least one papa kazama substory #and obv Tonight is there so like. the trio have been acknowledged which is nice #anyway very happy to see ichi again i miss him OH THE HIDDEN CAMERA SHIT. HRNGHHH NOBODY TOLD ME ABOUT THATTT #HGUHHHHHHHHHHHHNNNNMMNRHRGZGZHJDBDBD BAWLING BAWLING BAWLIGN BAWLIGN BAWLING FUCKIGN SCREAMING‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️#nooooooooooooo god it's so fucking sad dude... houghrhhgh like kiryu just crying and whimpering for a few minutes and the screen getting #more and more covered with his tears (and snot oops) and just. hububububhhhhh AND THE WAY HE LAUGHED WHEN THEY SAID NO ONE BELIEVED HE WAS #REALLY DEAD AT MORNING GLORY.. CUTE. YEAH WE ALL KNOW YOURE BAD AT DISGUISES I LOVE YOU FOREVER JORYU SUZUKI TAICHI #my heart.... kiryuuuuuuu kiryu i love you so much forever and everrrrrrrrr kiryujuiuuuuiu. GHRBMRNRNBSHAHSV #sad. sad sad sad. but not empty. never empty.#hhhnngnhnnn and like just. pshhhUGH i really liked the side characters this time around. akame and tsuruno and shishido and nishitani #BOY WAS I HAPPY TO SEE THE (LITERAL) BLOODLUST RETURN JDGDJS THAT SCENE WHERE HES LIKE joryu you got me ROCK HARD and tsuruno's like #p-patriarch?? LAUGHING MY FUCKIGN ASS OFF THAT SHIT WAS SO GOOD. THEY CALLED HIM A CAT IN HEAT STOPPPJDGSJSHS #and the lighting was pretty and the environments were gorgeous and i really liked everything i did #theyre starting to make the dragon engine combat good lol

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rox-reads · 1 year

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taylor... i hope you pay for their med bills later :(

#worm #parahumans #worm lb #worm33 #ch 11.3 #i keep thinking about how these people are... well they're definitely dangerous assholes who shouldn't be trying this shit #but they don't have powers #and they're mostly desperate people who've been left with nothing after leviathan attacked #and multiple bite bugs like these are potentially fatal and will require timely medical attention #lung almost died from all that and he was superpowered in a way that explicitly helped with this #(though there was armsmaster complicating things in that occasion)#when she fights other villains it's like welp. what can you do if she doesn't do that they're gonna blow her up so go ahead #and when she fights heroes it's like that AND they have a whole institution dedicated to supporting them so they're gonna be taken care of #and taylor always makes sure not to go into lethal territory #but also hospital bills require $$$ and these people don't have $$$#anyway what else is she supposed to do yknow i get it #gotta tell em to fuck off decisively or else they won't and they'll keep harassing people

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mitsuki91 · 9 months

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On a more serious note... I mean.

Coriolanus Snow is the man who lost it in, like, ten minutes when he was left alone with his own thoughts... Ten minute since he suspects the girl he loves left him... And he lost it in the worst way possible. In the "I will fucking kill her and this damn birds" way. Right? Right.

So please.

Put the cool and dominant and impassive Coryo away when you think about him. He is good for a good Coryo x reader bdsm session at best. He is not who he is in canon.

Try not to push this version as the canon version, worst if in the same breath you are asking me (or anyone else) if I have read the book recently because a Coryo who 'lost it' is not the 'real' Coryo. Sigh. Please.

#coriolanus snow #I am all to bend the canon to suit you #but not when you try to use that canon to justify an opinion that is not canon at all #i have ptsd with the marauders fandom #at least they consider their ff canon #most of them #but the book #really???#where is cool and controlled Coryo in the book???#LOL #the ballad of songbirds and snakes #tbosas #coriolanus snow meta #sort of meta #“ooooh nooo he smashed some things when he was alone he was so ooc”#“let me tell you the funny occasion in which he tried to kill her only love and girlfriend”

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maddie-grove · 10 months

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I do love the Bennet marriage because man they really do make each other worse. He’d still probably be a high-handed prick if he’d married a sensible, economical woman, but he wouldn’t be putting the family at risk of poverty and scandal on his own initiative. And she would still be irritable and foolish, probably, but a husband who was nice to her but capable of saying “we can’t afford that” or “Lydia can’t go to Brighton” would neutralize a lot of the effects.

#I mean obviously a man controlling all his wife’s money is a bigger problem #this is also why I love Don and Betty Draper’s terrible marriage #she obviously had a lot of really disturbing issues with her parents #but she did a lot better even with the mediocre henry francis #Don also got divorced from Megan so he’s more of a common denominator #but idk he was really playing on hard mode the first time around #ah yes marry the emotionally repressed perfect blonde aristocratic woman #just to guarantee that you will never tell her shit #I love the s1 scene where he’s like you are such a wonderful mother!!!#look I have defended Betty’s parenting on multiple occasions #not as good just as not always bad #but #like #I’m sure she looks like a great mother. to him #what with her lack of open hatred for the children

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smallhatlogan · 2 months

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pokemon center please release another golisopod plushie

#i got momentarily so excited when i saw that bug out plush badge because i thought it was a normal plush #every once in awhile my niece will tell me 'if i had like $400 i would buy you the golisopod plush' because i've expressed regret over #missing the original plush on so many different occasions. i really hate not having golisopod #(i would not let her do that. for the record. that's crazy)#who actually are the people who buy extremely overpriced retired plushies like that....

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suncaptor · 10 months

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makes me feel a bit insane that Britta is seen as being insane and selfish for being upset her parents who she's spent her life trying to get away from are using her friends to stalk her just because she's suffering financially and needs help.

#incoherents #community #britta perry #britta #she lists random events that are clearly indictiative of abuse from parents who cant even renember her childhood #and shes tried so hard to avoid them she's moved across the country at least on one occasion #and her friends spend game nights with them!?!?!?#like i do sort of get being willing to borrow money if you want to help her through them but even that is making her financially dependent #she's seen as insane for being willing to pay her parents back and drop her friends and change her while life because of this #but shes been betrayed by them??? theyre treating her as if shes crazy????#also speaks volumes to the fact her friends are SO cruel to her. she is consistently bullied and treated badly #i dont like. particularly like her all the time or anything but the way everyone including the show treats her is horrendous #regardless of if shes a great person her friends shouldnt be cruel to her all the time?????#tracks that theyd do this 🙄🙄#just rememberer jeff telling her shes selfish for being too proud to use her own support system and am full of rage again. like.#if you cant afford to help her without borrowing from her parents tell her oh my GOD #also the line about tinder. like she is fr being stalked and monitored against her consent #and it's treated like i guess a good thing since shes been homeless??????????#ahhh

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ohmrbandy · 4 months

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GUH

#tw vent #vent #where is that post about moms having an aura of despair when they are in a bad mood #she pushes having deep conversations with me that i have told her multiple times i am not ready to have with her and shell sit outside my #door and ask the same question over and over and over and over and ill do everything from tell her im busy to give a non asmwer to directly #say i dont want to talk rn and shell either k e e p on or fucking tell me i hate her or something #when she is in a mood she will do this like 2 to 5 times in a night I CANT TAKE IT ANYMOREE #there is no poing in engaging either ill give an answer on occasion if i feel fine to do so and shell tell me she wanted a dif answer #or better advice or something more meaningful or this or that I CANT DO IT ANYMORE #big sigh #Big sigh #my own apartment when #how to find roomates tutorial drop when #GUH

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salad-storm · 1 year

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It's not like I didn't Want him to die it's just. Why like this. For nothing at all. I'm tired of characters dying for no reason

#this includes yuki btw #like bro. give her back.#ALSO THO i had a lot of thoughts on gojos fate that i will elaborate on on another occasion But #this was one of the worse options i think idk #so far as i can tell! but we'll see #hehe #jjk #jujutsu kaisen #jjk spoilers #jjk leaks #jjk manga leaks #i hope thats enough spoiler warnings... soz if not #jujutsu kaisen spoilers #stormy in here #gojo satoru #tsukumo yuki #tagging her too ❗️#the others i can think of rn have at least Some Slightly More Understandable reason.#even if i dont like said reasons

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god-tier-bastard · 1 year

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foaming at the mouth trying to pay attention in class and not start writing an essay about how the girl in the fireplace's plot and character dynamics predict a hilarious amount of the eleventh doctor/amy pond's story and why the story elements they have in common are why i hate steven moffat so much

#dw #doctor who #moffat salt #so ur telling me the doctor on two separate occasions:#accvidentally dropped in on a little girl's timeline #left her for years and then came back after she'd written him off as an imaginary friend #they both at some point kissed/fell in love w him (bc moffat needs every woman in the universe to want the doctor for some reason)#ended up acquiring a weird nickname from the now woman #both women came to pretty much worship him like their own personal angel or deity #both women had some sort of window/door to somewhere else (time windows/crack in the wall) following them their whole lives #both women die of old age after the doctor fixes their door problem (idk how to phrase this but theres def parallels between their deaths)#also theres frsr something tying mickey and (at least season 5) rory together in this episode but i can't describe it properly

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