#i want them to talk about guitars so in comic book world you can

[scintillyyy]

tim owns a gibson les paul and dick canonically plays guitar and they never discuss this potential shared interest together and this offends me <3 set in robin 32 my beloved because paris to gotham is a long flight and i'm sure they chitchatted (lewis's tim who says he's not a music oriented guy you can't hurt me, the boy doesn't own a gibson les paul for nothing)

"You know," Dick says, peering over Tim's shoulder at the page of the flight magazine the kid seems to be stuck on. "Duty-free only applies up to $800 in purchases. I think a $5000 guitar is just a little bit over that cap."

Tim looks up at him--startled, almost. He's been a little out of it ever since he and Dick left Paris. 

Truthfully, he's been a little out of it since they realized that the Clench could reactivate at any moment. Dick supposes he can't blame Tim for that--he's been holding his breath everytime Tim dozes off himself. Whenever he closes his eyes, he can see Tim sitting at the wall, breathing heavy but still managing to joke around as blood started to seep out the bottom of his mask, his horrified realization at what that meant, the terrified look he gave to Dick right before he slumped over...

It's fine. It's fine. Once they get back to Gotham and find Ra's and get the real cure this'll all just be nothing more than a bad dream. 

Tim looks down at the page, like he's actually seeing it for the first time despite the fact that he staring at it for about five solid minutes before Dick decided to say something. "Oh. I, um, I wasn't actually thinking of buying one," he says, like he thinks Dick might've actually been serious about thinking Tim was going to try and buy a custom Fender Stratocaster tax free. "I mean, I don't need one of these anyways. I already have a Les Paul at home."

Which. Jeez. Leave it to Tim to just drop the fact that he owns a...probably $3000 guitar oh-so-casually, like it's really nothing out of the ordinary for a fourteen year old to own. Tim is usually so down to earth it's easy to forget that his family has...a lot more money than the average person. 

Every so often he does like to remind them all, though.

"Really?" Dick teases. "Don't tell me. You had to have it because that's what the lead guitarist in Green Day uses." Which. It is a weird fact for Dick to know, but Tim seems to really like them--so of course he had to at least check them out, watch a few music videos. And *Dick's* played guitar since he was a kid, of course he was going to recognize a Gibson Les Paul, even if he is more of an acoustic guy himself. 

"I didn't exactly ask for it," Tim replies, a little sullen and pouty at Dick's teasing. "It's just--after dad got out of the hospital, I think he thought I'd like it after, y'know, everything. I don't think he realized I hadn't actually played in a couple of years."

Dick was unaware Tim ever did. It's interesting--a little kernel of a kid who, despite being the kind of person who can probably make conversation with a rock if he tries hard enough, can be surprisingly very guarded about himself. "You used to play?" he asks, tone casual, pretending he's not digging. 

Tim flushes and looks away, out the window. "Not really," he says. "I learned a bit when I was younger. After I got into listening to, like, real music." He hesistates. Even with his face turned away, Dick can tell by the tension in Tim's temple that he's debating on if he's going to continue what he's saying. Dick doesn't say anything, keeps quiet instead. In his experience, the best way to get someone to keep talking sometimes is to just let them go at their own pace. If they want to say it, they will. But only if you give them the chance. "Um. It was actually after I went to Bern with my parents over winter break once. It was--I was excited. They didn't take me on trips super often--they usually wanted to spend my school breaks at home. So it was the probably first time I'd been on a plane, actually. I always thought--I guess I always thought plane rides would be way more exciting than they actually are. Anyways, um. I was bored and I was just flipping through the in-flight entertainment and I ended up on the music video channel and--that might've be the first time? I think that was the first time I saw a Green Day video. And I--I was like wow. I was so impressed. And I turned to my mom and I said--I said I want to learn how to play just like that. And she said of course."

Unlike Jack--who Dick hears about constantly--Tim doesn't really talk about his mom much. Or ever really. Dick can probably count on one hand  the amount of times he's heard Tim bring her up since the funeral. And when one of those times was just a few weeks ago, during one of the many times Dick called Alfred to check on Tim and he could hear the kid in the background, sick and delirious with fever, wimpering for his mom, dad, Dana, anyone-

Well, anyways. Tim really doesn't talk about his mom much.

Dick bites the inside of his cheek. Clearly the nice thing to do would be to drop it here, before he really depresses the kid. But he can't deny that he's a bit curious to hear Tim go on, hear more about this. He really shouldn't ask though--he's trying to cheer Tim up, not make things worse.

But, Dick supposes. If Tim really didn't want to talk about it, he would have found a way to change the subject instead. He's pretty good at that, in Dick's experience. 

So he must want to talk about it. And Dick is curious. He's not a total saint, after all. "So you got lessons?" he asks. 

"Um. Kind of. I mean, usually that's what they would do whenever I expressed an interest in anything. Um. At least my mom did. She'd always do a ton of research to find the highest rated courses and make a ton of calls, even if she was a thousand miles away, just get me signed up for the best one as soon as possible. But, no. This time--this time, she--um. She kind of taught me a little bit herself instead." Dick's eyebrows shoot up in surprise. Of all the things he expected to hear, that wasn't even a remote possibility. Tim swallows hard. "Yea, um. She said. She said she used to play in college, y'know. And after we got home, we went up to the attic of the townhouse and got out her old acoustic. It was just this cheap old thing. We must've spent all afternoon trying to get it tuned, god, my dad left the house, said his ears were going to start bleeding if he had to listen to us anymore." Tim looks down at his hands now. He clasps them together, twiddling his thumbs a bit. "We gave up by dinner, just went to go buy a new one instead. And then she taught me the basics, y'know. I'd practice, and then whenever she was home, we'd play together. I was never very good. She was a lot better." Tim frowns. "But still. She got me an electric guitar for my tenth birthday. Not anything too fancy, just enough so I could feel like a rockstar, she said. And that I'd get there, I just had to keep practicing."

"But you didn't?" Dick asks. It is a bit surprising, now that he's heard the whole story. It seems like something that would have been important to Tim to keep up. The kid's a bit sentimental like that. "You said it's been a couple of years, right?"

Tim's face shutters ever do slightly. "Well, ah, that is-" he says, floundering a bit. Now he's trying to sidestep. "The electric guitar broke. Um. On accident. Right before school let out back when I was eleven. And after that, I just. Couldn't find it in me to play anymore. I could never bring myself to tell my mom what happened, so I just said I was bored of it instead." Tim's mouth twists. "She was a little disappointed. I think she always hoped I'd pick it up again someday. I dunno. I thought about it. When I saw the new guitar in my room. But looking at it I just couldn't. It was too, too--" Tim sighs. "Maybe I should've. Given it another chance. I just, I wasn't--and now, who knows if there'll be one before-" Tim stops. He doesn't finish his sentence. He doesn't have to.

"Ah." Things start clicking together for Dick in a terrible way. Tim, who's been quiet and melancholy. Worried that the Clench could come back any minute, that he won't have a chance to do things that he maybe thought he could push off for the someday.

He suddenly seems so young. So young and lost and scared.

Tim's going to get a chance to play that guitar again. Dick's not sure how many people he's going to have to punch to make it happen, but he will. And once he does, maybe, just maybe Dick can casually mention that he plays on occasion too. They could make an afternoon of it. Order a pizza, maybe argue about music a bit. And Tim can say something like, hey, I think my mom would be really happy to see me doing this again. 

It'll be nice.

[softpine]

I just remembered you haven't seen Twilight but I'm going to ask anyway! Do you know what teams your characters would be? Like team Edward or Team Jacob? Oh! Actually I'm also curious what Fandoms would they be in? I recent realized im a Bielieber

oh i have seen the first twilight movie!! i just wasn't a fan. but it was my best friend's favorite series so i do know a lot about it! was anyone actually team jacob? he's like gale in the hunger games. the only reason anyone would actually prefer them is because they're Not the main love interest (sorry to any galeheads out there...)

anyway now i want to imagine what fandoms each of them would be in, so:

🎭 caroline: well, she's a great artist and a monster fucker.. i don't think i have to spell out what she was doing online fjkjsdsj and she loved comic books as a kid, so i feel like at the start of the MCU madness she was really hype and then she got more and more angry with the state of things

💬 beth: she's written some star trek fanfiction more highly researched than her master's thesis and she loved nsync because what is a baby dyke without her emotional support boy band / comphet crushes

🎸 danny: music is the obvious answer, but i'm not familiar with musical history so i can't go into detail 😭 but his dad introduced him to bob dylan and taught him how to play guitar, then he learned piano, then he taught himself how to produce his own music from scratch. this was in the 90s btw so it wasn't very easy to learn. also he used to seriously follow skateboarding

⛅ mikaela: she loved old school country music from female artists like tanya tucker, reba mcintire, loretta lynn, etc. she's less interested in modern country but she looooves shania twain. and she's worked nights (first as a bartender, then a nurse) for most of her life, so she got really into daytime soaps

🌲 asa: he's literally the only one on this list where i'm like...... stumped. he doesn't pay attention to anything online, celebrities, music (he'll listen to whatever), movies (doesn't care), could never commit to watching a whole tv show, etc. he's very floaty and daydreamy? lmao he just doesn't have the headspace to get attached to fictional media like that

🎥 finn: we know he's always been a harrison ford fan boy and in any universe where he survives past the 80s he's a huge nirvana fan!! (if he and jules had a son, they would've named him kurt... he's deeply serious) he's also read every stephen king book that came out while he was alive. he was a big reader in general, particularly horror

🧸 stevie: canon seth rogen super fan, has seen every adam sandler movie (every last one of them) and i knowww she knows the fnaf lore... as soon as she finishes a show/movie she likes to find the weirdest fan art to terrorize her followers. also loves musicals and wants to see cats on broadway someday (a girl can dream)

🎀 elaine: she loves following celebrity news but she watches them like animals in the zoo; ie. she's observing from afar, she has no personal stake in them. she's a frequent flyer on gossip forums like fauxmoi. she was on the ground floor of lipstickgate and was SEATED for dramageddon. and she had a serious twilight phase

🎨 jada: SOMEONE on this list had to get assigned supernatural... i'm not saying it just to say it, i really think she would connect with (early seasons) sam what with the dead mom... fear of losing their humanity... having powers they don't understand... a hot girl manipulating them to use their abilities in sketchy ways... yeah. i'm sure she has favorite contemporary artists (painters specifically) that she'd be able to talk about on end but sadly i don't know anything about that world 😭 oh and she's kind of obsessed with hate-reading booktok books to feel alive

🏈 casper: sports count as fandoms and i don't want to hear a word about it!! his team is the patriots but he's kind of a fairweather fan (maine doesn't have an nfl team so he doesn't have that state loyalty factor). miley cyrus is his problematic fave forever but he's kind of a pop girlie in general

💋 coco: in high school she was a speedcuber if that gives you an idea of what we're working with here.... she grew up with pokemon, naruto, dragon ball z, she collected trading cards, etc. she still likes anime and video games and stuff, she just doesn't have the time to get invested like she used to, and it makes her sad because it reminds her of her late best friend liam. she makes time to play fortnite and minecraft with his little brother and she plays other games on twitch sometimes. has done a LOT of cosplay. she's a huge nerd basically

[justsomerandomfanfic]

Hi! Can i request a romantic matchup for star wars, hp marauders and DC? :3 (sorry if i make any mistakes english is not my first language :3) Anyways, about me: I'm bisexual and demisexual. She/her pronouns but neutrals are fine. Infj 4w3, big 3 are; gemini sun, taurus moon, sag rising. I have short dark hair and I loveeee to style it like marilyn monroe (I'm obsessed with old hollywood) I have olive pale skin and dark brown eyes, I'm 5'7 and skinny but not too much mostly because I'm a figure skater! idk i think im really pretty! Mexican with italian and native family. Older sister that basically took raised her little brother and depressed mom (damn.)I love my family and basically love human interactions lmao. Extrovert (? idk) my friends describe me as likeable, charismatic, clumsy, witty, confident, idealistic, caring and nice. I love making people feel comfortable and welcome. People that don't like me may describe me as argumentative, annoying, stubborn, greedy, with ego or even mean and i'm not going to deny anything of that tbh. I loveeee feeling pretty and I'm a girly nerd girl, champagne colors, black and pink are def my thing. I love political science, neuropsychology, literature, women history and pyshics. My specials interests are: old hollywood, star wars (mostly obi-wan kenobi lol) manifestation, barbie and Sylvia plath. And yes, I'm autistic but I work with it really well. I love to perform and all that stuff, I was in a band, playing guitar and singing, musicals, figure skating, ballet etc. I don't talk about my problems to anyone, i just write them down because i don't really like to worry people and i know it's not healthy but idc. I always manage to be optimistic but realistic. I'm a perfectionist and I reaaaaally hate doing something wrong so that's mostly when I have my mental breakdowns lmao. Quite touchy with people i really like, hugs, touching faces, playing with hair, toying with hands, but I always make sure that they're okay with it! Also i'm quite bubbly and flirty but I'm not really interested on someone(mostly because now relationships are really weird, help.), I'm really specific with what i want and i have high standards. I hate: thunderstorms(im really scared of them) crowded places were i'm alone, really negative people, pick me's, pumpkins, immature people, facists, last minute surprise, people with horrible communication skills. Sand and the beach. Maps and driving, unfair stuff, sexism and men being stupid. I love: summer and spring, animals, makeup, any kind of music but my favs are: mcr, britney spears, fiona apple, the cardigans, marina, lana del rey, ariana grande, nine inch nails, the cure and bikini kill. Stawberrys, gossip girl, mexican soap operas (I LOVE RUBI AND TERESA!!!) comics and nerdy stuff (It all started because i wanted to prove a boy that I hated that I knew more about star wars than him and I ended up watching all the movies, series and reading all prequels books lmao)playing legos with my little brother, baking and having debates with my literature teacher.

Hello! I'm sorry this has taken so long to get posted! I hope you like it nonetheless! (I also love old hollywood! I love marilyn, audrey hepburn, and cary grant!) Enjoy! <33333

---

(Romantic);

---

Star Wars;

Obi-Wan Kenobi:

🌙 You met Obi-Wan on a random planet that he was visiting for some undisclosed reasons; you were walking with your friends past him, and as you both passed each other, you made eye contact - the world seemed to slow down, your eyes locked on one another - love at first sight

🌙 You didn't see Obi-Wan until when you and your friends we drinking in the nearby cantina; your friends gestured to the mysterious man across the bar, and you followed their line of sight - seeing the man that you had passed earlier that day, your friends hyped you up to go over and talk to him

🌙 The conversation floooowed, and I mean flowed, the instant connection that you had with this man was undeniable and intoxicating - you couldn't get enough of his voice and how his words seemed to grapple and pull you right in; it wasn't until later in the night that you found out his name, Obi-Wan Kenobi

🌙 Months later, Obi-Wan, trapped in the Jedi Laws, tried to hide how much he enjoyed your presence, but it was difficult, in the end - risking his Jedi life and duty - he confessed who he truly was, but you still loved him all the same

🌙 Your and Obi's relationship was kept a secret, even from most of your friends, though Anakin quickly figured it out - you and Obi were a perfect match, always there for each other, always understanding and caring towards one another; you both loved each other to the moons and back... And then some

---

Harry Potter (Marauders);

James Potter:

✨ You met James at Hogwarts, and you instantly felt a connection between the two of you - it wasn't long until the both of you were flirting with one another, joking around, having a few laughs; the feelings you had for each other were unspoken, but understood

✨ You and James were inseparable, whenever you could, you'd be together, joined at the hip, no matter the time of day - and you were always touching each other in some way, holding hands, playing with his hair, his arms around you; you'd often squish his cheeks together, James would always blush at the contact

✨ When spending nights together - either just cuddling or talking about your favorite music, comics, or your love for strawberries - and a thunderstorm arises, he is always there for you, distracting you or covering your ears while holding you; if a storm is coming, it's like a sixth sense

✨ During the summer, you and James meet up as much as possible - you get the opportunity to show him your favorite music, movies, and shows - sometimes if you're lucky, James let's you do his makeup

✨ James and your little bro would probably get along beautifully as well, and I would bet that James would love to play with Legos with you and your brother - even though he has no idea what they are in the beginning XD

---

DC;

Harley Quinn:

♥ You met Harley at one of her roller derby games - being a figure skater, you enjoyed seeing people roller skate - you immediately caught her eyes as she raced around the track; your Marilyn Monroe styled hair was amazing to say the least

♥ She had to tell you how much she loved your hair, and she did after winner her match, meeting you out in the parking lot before you and your friends left; she made sure to compliment you (a lot), and even gave you her card, which you took with a smile

♥ Her card didn't have any number or address, so you believed that it was going to be difficult to find her, but you were surprisingly wrong - small world, even if it was Gotham - you met her at this small convenience store, where you found her waiting for a breakfast sandwich

♥ You and her decided to walk around Gotham together, but the outing was short lived as she was getting chased by like ten people - you didn't see Harley for a long while, but when you did, she had a Hyena and a kid (and a nice car)

♥ You joined Harley and Cassandra (and Bruce) on their adventures, stealing marshmallows from stores, going around town causing slight chaos, and just having a grand ol' time together

---

[mikasa-imadebiscults]

Hey there my friend! Hope your day/night is as awesome as can be! Can I request a matchup for attack on Titan? You make my world a better place☺️!

Name/age: Savannah/21

Sexuality: pan

MBTI/sign: INTJ/Virgo

Pronouns: she/her

Appearance: I’m mixed race with light olive skin and lots of freckles. I have a long black Afro and brown eyes. I’m on the curvy side and I’m pretty tall, I’m around 5’9. I look pretty much like ice spice with a smaller nose and black hair lol. It’s so uncanny we could probably be twins

Personality: I’m described as sweet and kind but very awkward and quiet. I’m somewhat weird and I get my bursts of energy but I’m very laid back and down to earth. I’m also very smart and always love a good puzzle or challenge. If I was to say I was like any character personality wise I’d say I’m exactly like Luna lovegood from Harry Potter 100% (I want to just stick out there that while I hate j.k Rowling, the books had a special place in my miserable childhood💀) . I’m nothing but gooey, sweet, sugary mush. I’m tender hearted and care so deeply for others I’m easily walked over and taken advantage of and I’m admittedly a total pushover. But I’m extremely empathetic and always am there to help a friend when needed! I do however have autism and that’s something they’d have to deal with😊

Likes: I like books, animals, working out, video games, anime, comics, movies, shopping, cleaning, makeup, designing, playing guitar and piano, singing, writing, cooking, sleeping, eating, snuggles, stuffies, pizza, pasta, cookies, music, dancing, things that smell nice, baths, hiking, and anything to do with travel!

Dislikes: bugs, veggies, loud noises, rude and stuck up people, heat, cold, any food squishy and slimy, heights, fire, pie, semi trucks, cowboy movies, quiche, dirt and filth or mess, children, when people insist they are correct when they aren’t, and squirrels

(HELLO MY FRIEND you are a very sweet person, thank you for your kind words and I really hope you enjoy this match up and have a wonderful day!!)

I match you with..

🧪Hange Zoë🧪

- They love how kind and caring you are.

- It makes them angry when people take advantage of you, because you don’t deserve any of that.

- Makes all different types of puzzles and challenges for you to solve >:)

- One time they tried to do your makeup and they had no idea what they were doing so they were asking a lot of questions but it actually turned out decent.

- Hange’s desk is usually always cluttered with paperwork and stuff but when they found out that you dislike mess they try their best to be more organized for you.

- Will listen to you talk for hours about your favorite books and comics and reads them with you if you don’t mind.

- Tries to learn a pasta recipe on their own so that they can cook it and surprise you with it for dinner.

- Your voice calms them down especially when they had a stressful day. They love it when you sing to them while you two are cuddling, they can and will fall asleep to your voice no matter what it sounds like.

- FUCKIN’ OBLITERATES BUGS FOR YOU. Only broke a few chairs..and tables

Masterlist

[phanfictioncatalogue]

Awkwardness Masterlist

A Book, An Umbrella, And Two Caramel Macchiatos (ao3) - koleen

Summary: Dan works at a little bookstore where a mute Phil looks for the book he wants, resulting to a lot of awkward moments and a whole lot of cute things that would make your heart flutter hehe.

All I Want For Christmas (Is You) (ao3) - lestered (clonetrobed)

Summary: AU where Dan is Phil’s Christmas coworker crush, and awkward boys are awkward.

As Awkward As Can Be - passionfruitwriter

Summary: “hey we hooked up last night and it turns out you are my child’s teacher"

Awkward Encounters With Louise - dxnhowell

Summary: Louise and Jack meet up with Dan and Phil at their hotel room and it’s obvious what they’ve just done, so Louise teases them about it.

Caught (ao3) - Do_it_with_the_Howell_Lesters

Summary: The very first time Dan comes to stay with his boyfriend Phil after months of talking online and via Skype is exciting for both of them. But it can also be quite awkward, especially when you are having sex with your boyfriend on a pool table and your mum walks in.

Celebrity Dating Life Hacks (ao3) - counting2fifteen

Summary: An interviewer asks some awkward questions about what it’s like to date as a public figure.

Coffee Shop (ao3) - INeverHadMyInternetPhase (BirbWatcher)

Summary: Dan's working in a coffee shop while he studies at Manchester University. He still watches youtube in his spare time, of course - that isn't a habit he's likely to break any time soon. He gets a bit of a shock when AmazingPhil himself walks into his lowly little cafe on one of his busiest shifts.

Creeper (ao3) - adorkablephil (kimberly_a)

Summary: Dan and Phil meet for the first time in 2009 and Phil worries that he seems like some sort of creepy internet predator

Deluge (ao3) - cottoncandyhurricanes (orphan_account)

Summary: It was raining. Not that kind of spring rain, where the clouds would lightly mist the world below, and disappear. No; things were heavy. Unforgiving. The cold water nipped at Phil, as he shivered, looking around for a place to escape the rain.

AU where Phil's lost in the streets of Reading for some reason. It's raining, and Dan finds him feverish and soaking wet on the road.

Only Fools Fall (ao3) - sinking_wthatship

Summary: “Well, well, hello there !” the black haired boy smiled, waving into Dan’s direction and, fuck. Bloody fucking hell. There was absolutely no way this could be just happening right now, Dan thought, and simultaneously, of course it was. This type of shit could only be happening to him, because what are the odds for someone to literally go out for the first time in days to a dusty nerdy comic books shop and realize the only other customer is that boy you met at a bar and shagged a few night ago?

or Basically just awkward strangers Dan and Phil with lots of sexual tension but also emotional connection (sort of). SPOILER ALERT There is smut. And Tooth-rotting fluff. Lots of it.

slow-closing doors (ao3) - kae_karo

Summary: SECRETS, DRAMA, BETRAYAL (okay no betrayal dw).

Phil's agreed to be an RA for his floor this year at uni, and he's determined to be the best RA ever - after all, this is these students' first year, he wants them to have the best year ever.

The Wallflower’s Guide to Love (ao3) - Art3misPlayerOne

Summary: Dan is a brilliant but painfully shy and awkward guitar player in a popular local band who prefers to hide from the spotlight. He’s content to lose himself in his playing and avoids friendships and emotional attachments, but an accidental run-in with a mystery boy inspires him to reach out to him through anonymous texts.

Too scared that the boy will be disappointed in the real him, Dan doesn’t want to reveal his identity and risk losing their surprising connection. When forced to choose between his anonymity and putting his heart on the line, help from an unexpected friendship pushes him far beyond his comfort zone, but will it be too little too late?

Too Early (ao3) - orphan_account

Summary: He looked down and around and clasped a hand over his mouth.

How the ever-loving-fluff had he managed to get into Phil’s room, climb under Phil’s covers, and almost fall asleep in Phil’s bed to the sound of Phil’s breathing—

Oh. Oh shit.

Two Blushing Pilgrims (ao3) - hxwell

Summary: "Our teacher ships the two of us and we're reading Romeo and Juliet" au//Dan owns 7 pairs of the same jeans and high-fives everyone he sees while Phil listens to Neutral Milk Hotel and paints in his spare time

Waiting, Hoping With Each Breath (ao3) - worriedpeach (skeletonflowers)

Summary: After Dan’s girlfriend breaks up with him, Phil finds his best friend suddenly a lot closer than he’s ever remembered them being before. For some reason, he doesn’t mind it much at all. In fact, Phil quite enjoys the late night cuddles and the way Dan clings to him whenever they watch television. He probably enjoys it a little bit too much.

What Happened Last Night? (ao3) - duskomybloom

Summary: Things get complicated when Dan wakes up in Phil's bed after a party and he has no idea how he got there.

[harlcwes]

kaylee   kaneshiro.     they/she.     non-binary.      ›     spotted   at   the   met   steps   ,   HARLOWE  SAITO   BRENNER   ,   most   likely   listening   to   back   in   black   by   ac/dc   with   their   airpods   pro   .   the   twenty-five  year  old   gained   quite   a   reputation   ,   known   to   be   -blunt   yet   +resilient   to   anyone   who   knows   them   .   you'll   easily   spot   them   when   you   hear   about   a   motorcycle   speeding  down  the  street   ,   drumming  against   any   surface   out   of   habit   ,   an   intricate   sleeve   tattoo   ,   followed   by   jasmin   17   by   le   labo   .   latest   nepoupdates   article   talks   about   catfight   ?   harlowe   brenner   spotted   getting    into   a   physical   altercation   with   the   paparazzi   ,   but   i   guess   any   reputation   is   good   reputation   .  

[  !  ]  WANTED  CONNECTIONS.

[  !  ]  ESTABLISHED  CONNECTIONS.

penned  by  HECATE  (  she/her  ,  pst  ,  21+  )

OVERVIEW .

STATS  PAGE .

NOTE :  harlowe’s pronouns  are  they  and  she  so  please  keep  that  in  mind  !  preferred  pronouns  are  they/them  however  ,  she/her  is  also  acceptable  .  to  clear  up  any  possible  confusion  ,  my  writing  uses  both  pronouns  !

FULL NAME: harlowe yumi brenner

NICKNAME(S) / ALIASES: harles

DOB: 10/31/1997

AGE: 25

HEIGHT: 6′0″

ZODIAC: scorpio

GENDER: non-binary

PRONOUNS: they/them/theirs, she/her/hers

ROMANTIC ORIENTATION: biromantic

SEXUAL ORIENTATION: bisexual

LANGUAGES: japanese, english , spanish

AESTHETICS:  a  motorcycle  speeding  down  the  street  ,  drummming  against  any  surface  out  of  habit  ,  an  intricate  sleeve  tattoo  ,  leather  jackets  ,  toying  with  a  butterfly  knife  ,  the  feel  of  toned  muscles  ,  wearing  doc  martens  on  the  daily  ,  kickboxing

CHARACTER  PARALLELS:  georgia  miller  (  ginny  and  georgia  )  ,  haley  graham  (  stick  it  )  ,  stiles  stilinski  (  teen  wolf  )  ,  luna  snow  (  marvel  comics  )  ,  donna  troy  (  dc  comics  )

BACKGROUND .

 they’re  born  into  a  legacy  in  los  angeles  .  victor  brenner  is  a  former  winter  olympian  .  having  won  gold  in  snowboarding  multiple  times  and  now  is  a  highly  sought  after  coach  .  naomi  saito  was  a  renowned  actress  and  musician  .  part  of  a  j-pop  girl  group  that  went  global  in  the  90s  and  won  an  academy  award  back  in  the  2000s  .  born  at  exactly  8:28pm  and  on  the  same  day  as  their  older  brother  ,  harlowe  is  brought  into  the  world  .  from  then  on  ,  them  along  with  their  brother  became  the  dynamic  duo  of  child  actors  .  with  victor  being  a  former  athlete  and  naomi  ,  an  actress  and  musician  ,  it  was  a  no  brainer  that  the  twins  would  go  into  either  profession  .

 at  age  5  ,  harlowe  is  as  cindy  lou  who  in  how  the  grinch  stole  christmas  ,  jumpstarting  her  career  in  acting  .  from  then  on  they  start  booking  various  roles  in  various  shows  like  spy  kids  2  and  bridge  to  terabithia  .  during  this  time  ,  harlowe  also  starts  voice  and  music  classes  .  they  take  up  piano  before  moving  on  to  guitar  then  bass  and  then  percussion  ,  falling  in  love  with  the  notion  of  playing  drums  .  and  at  age  8  ,  they’re  told  they’re  a  music  prodigy  .

 at  age  13  ,  harlowe  gets  cast  as  jenny  humphrey  in  gossip  girl  and  stays  as  a  series  regular  for  about  three  seasons  .  for  the  time  being  ,  she  and  her  family  relocate  to  new  york  .  and  while  not  everyone’s  favorite  character  ,  harlowe  finds  success  in  that  role  .  a  couple  years  down  the  line  ,  they  start  their  band  ,  ultraviolet  .  the  band’s  success  ultimately  leads  them  to  leave  gossip  girl  and  take  a  break  from  acting  due  to  being  pulled  in  different  directions  .  she  starts  to  separate  herself  from  her  brother  .  focusing  more  on  music  than  acting  .  playing  shows  and  eventually  touring  the  united  states  .

 at  the  end  of  their  first  tour  ,  the  group  goes  on  hiatus  for  a  couple  years  ,  letting  harlowe  focus  on  college  .  they  secure  a  spot  at  juilliard  .  by  now  ,  they’re  known  as  more  than  just  one  half  of  the  brenner  siblings  .  since  graduating  ,  harlowe  has  taken  a  permanent  residence  in  new  york  .

PERSONALITY .

 they’re  perceptive  .  direct  .  sociable  .  others  often  see  them  as  comfortable  with  their  environment  .  they  also  keep  people  on  their  toes  ,  never  quite  knowing  what  to  expect  from  them  .  however  ,  they  can  be  insensitive  and  impatient  at  times  .  their  bluntness  shining  through  with  those  who  can’t  keep  up  with  them  or  when  things  get  a  little  too  emotional  for  their  liking  .  and  despite  her  demeanor  ,  she’s  quite  fond  of  company  and  is  the  type  to  interact  with  almost  everyone  at  any  event  .

HEADCANONS .

this  section  is  a  wip  and  will  be  updated  when  i  think  of  more  things  !  <3

 career  claim  /  inspo  :  taylor  momsen  &  bailee  madison  .  they  were  cast  in  how  the  grinch  stole  christmas  ,  spy  kids  2  ,  and  gossip  girl

 went  to  juilliard  for  college  and  graduated  with  a  bachelor  of  music  with  focuses  in  composition  and  piano

is  the  drummer  and  lead  singer  of  their  band  ‘  ultraviolet  ’

 has  extended  family    living  in  new  york  so  the  city  isn’t  unfamiliar  territory  to  them

has  a  dobermann  named  kenzo

 did  brazilian  jiu  jitsu  when  they  were  younger  and  continued  on  into  adulthood  .  they  currently  have  their  blackbelt  !

in  recent  years  has  picked  up  kickboxing

 collects  vintage  weaponry  (  specifically  knives  and  daggers  )  and  butterfly  knives  

speaking  of  butterfly  knives  ,  often  has  one  on  her  and  is  often  doing  tricks  with  it  whenever  they  want  to  keep  their  hands  busy

if  it  is  not  obvious  ,,,  a  little  bit  of  an  adrenaline  junkie

has  been  away  touring   with  their  band  and  it  only  recently  ended  so  harlowe’s  taking  a  bit  of  a  breather  before  starting  to  compose  next  album

[insomniac-jay]

InkStain Childhood Lore

Description: A synopsis of Irefumi's childhood including how he met his bandmates, his time at Brazil's hero college, and his meeting with his future wife.

Warning(s): Minor violence

Additional tags: I always talk abt his past in relation to him and Joou's first meeting but never the full thing, you can see the compare and contrasts in him and Joou's backstories

Taglist: @floof-ghostie @calciumcryptid @s0ursop @pizzolisnacks @opalofoctober @elflynns-horde-of-stuff @peachyblkdemonslayer

Born to a Afro-Brazilian mother and a Japanese-Brazilian father in São Paulo, Irefumi grew up in a diverse neighborhood.

Their parents were always busy due to Juliana (Irefumi's mom) working as a comic book artist for a big name publisher and Fumio (Irefumi's father) working long hours as a freelance journalist. Not to mention that they often had to move around the city to meet the demands of Fumio's job.

Despite this, Juliana and Fumio always found a way to make time for their son.

For the longest time, both Irefumi and his parents thought he was Quirkless until one day. He was five years old and attending a birthday party for a friend's kids. The young Irefumi put a temporary tattoo on his arm and it came to life. Juliana was surprised at how quickly her son's Quirk manifested.

As a kid, they always had a love of music-- both making and listening. Whether it was the R&B soul their mom would play or the city pop their dad would play, they would always listen and ask their parents about the meaning behind some of the songs.

When they were 7 years old, Irefumi got their first instrument-- a black Spanish style guitar-- as a birthday present.

As they got older, Irefumi became more and more interested in making music. At 10 years old, he bought a camera from a nearby store to record him singing it. Even though he loved it, Irefumi longed for something more.

During their pre teen years, they met Benedito Gordo, the future drummer of Black Moon, on their way back home. Benedito had run into some trouble with some delinquents and ended up getting mugged by them in the process. Irefumi felt bad for him and offered to help him get his money back.

They went to the gang's hangout and fought them for Benedito's money back. Along the way to the hangout, they learned that Benedito had a similar interest in music and that the money was supposed to buy him drumsticks for his new drum set.

One of the delinquents ended up slashing Irefumi in the arm (which would later be covered up with a tattoo of dragon), causing them to need stitches due to how deep the cut was. From that day forward, Benedito and Irefumi became friends.

It was also on that day that Irefumi decided to become a hero.

Wanting to begin his heroic training early, he signed up for martial arts classes-- particularly capoeira. His capoeira teacher was a punk and a retired hero himself which was great for the now teenage Irefumi.

He asked his teacher what it was like being a hero. His teacher told him the truth by saying that if he could be a hero again, he could; but he'd never do so for any corporation.

This answer confused Irefumi and he asked his teacher what he meant. That's when he learned the full truth on how the corporate world really sees and treats heroes.

The teacher told him that the organization he used to work for would often steal half his salary, purposefully spread lies and rumors about him when he did or said something they didn't like, and even forced him compromise his morals and image for something controversial-- leading him to retire in the middle of his career. Since then, he has become vocal against hero organizations.

But he also told Irefumi not to be disillusioned by his story; rather to make it a step towards a revolution. A step towards liberation for heroes from corporate greed and abuse. He recognized the teen boy as a promising hero in the future and told him that he'd do great things for the people.

Taking those words to heart, Irefumi became radicalized. He adopted punk beliefs and fashion and eventually changed his music style to that of punk rock.

They would meet Gaspar Milos, the bassist and final member of Black Moon, during their final year of high school. Gaspar overheard Irefumi talking about forming a band with Benedito during lunch and wanted to join. To prove it, he showed them his skills at playing the bass guitar.

For college, Irefumi chose the São Paulo Institute of Heroics while his friends went off the normal college but still kept in contact. He was in the same class as some other Brazilian heroes including Mystic (Beatriz Teixeira) and many more.

One of his classmates, who was a drag queen, heard he was in a band and asked him if they could perform at the local venue. Irefumi agreed and that's where his band Black Moon made their debut.

During junior year of college, Irefumi was assigned a mission to capture a villain that had escaped overseas. They were excited to get some experience and gladly accepted.

When they arrived in Japan, they met their partner: a woman named Joou. They weren't put off by her cold, robotic nature even if she was put off by their carefree demeanor.

As the mission continued, Irefumi began to fall in love with Joou. While others saw a cold, uncaring robot who never emoted outside the occasional grimace, he saw a beautiful and intelligent but jaded woman who needed a ray of sun in her life. He was determined to be that ray of sun and began flirting with her throughout the mission, much to both her embarrassment and annoyance.

When the mission was over and the villain was successfully captured, he was approached by a flustered Joou who asked him to play a song for her. Irefumi happily accepted and sang the very first song he wrote-- which happened to be a love song.

Before heading back to Brazil, he gave Joou his number and a gold necklace with a diamond music note.

During his senior year, him and Joou would marry and father their son Hiko a year after graduation.

[theredandwhitequeen]

Episode 3 Roswell New Mexico thoughts  Bonnie and Clyde Humanity’s self indulgence led us astray…. We’re not here for fun, we have important work to do.  Camping out Michael and Dallas wild pony playing pool ….My bags are unpacked…. Bonnie at the Wild Pony, drinking His guitar Michael talking to Bonnie Taste testing Playing the guitar and Alex is not there Playing music helped me escape the world… Took the pick The symbol on the glass Max and a gun shooting cans Jenna Jones is haunting us from the grave…. Patricia’s box was broken into Everybody but Alex and Rosa, Kyle Space gultch expo Maria worried about her visions More lost soul than evil dictator. Why are you calling him Guerin, Max? Max is a jerk VIP to a wine tasting for Isobel and Anatsa Liz and Eduardo at Deep Sky Max Science Petroleum hydrocarbon  Max, Liz, Shani, at the oil derrick Kyle at the hospital - Maria About the drugs Stole something Says feeling achy Graham Greene, Dallas, Michael  Michael talking to Dallas in his head and back Conspiracy theories  Not government source Great grandfather  Saw sigil on case in safe deposit box Different branch  I am the screw up, max is the cop…. Oh Michael Anatsa and Isobel wine tasting Kyle and new girlfriend Kira Pinot Picard Resistance is futile  Poor Kyle Liz I know why you are here Liz…. ….I think something alien brought you back to Roswell  What brought me to Roswell…healing properties…. Daughter I’ll I’m already versed in alien science…. Maria at the pony Injected self, threw a glass Dallas Kyle and isobel  Dating tips Comic books, likes Lois Lane Insurance Company, bank robbery at the Insurance company  Maria  Adrenaline shots Doesn’t want to tell anybody Feeling useless  Patricia left stuff with Mimi Max and Liz Why not try Michael’s way… Abilities changed when untethered from Jones Multiplied I feel like the Hulk in a China shop… Going to do Michael’s plan Maria and Dallas Searching Patricia’s stuff Safety deposit keys 2 different banks Isobel and Kyle Are annoyed ….The truth is out there… Isobel used powers on phone Bonnie and Clyde Bank heist Max, Liz and Jenna You don’t see the greatest that’s yet to come, when I get out of this vault, I’ll show you. Michael breaks them out It’s your one shot to run, hits Michael. See you at the junk yard Michael, Max, Jenna, Liz Gave the pick back Kyle and Isobel Isobel is sad I mindscaped her Kyle…. What if I’m Noah…. Transparency takes courage…. They’re sweet I miss Alex Maria, Dallas Alien glass Grieving the loss of her powers They’re cute Talking about his dad Max, Liz artifact Dallas saving Maria 3rd alien Eduardo Bewitching Eduardo Sanders Michael and Bonnie You’re Oasian  Guitar again Teaching her to play Dallas and Maria What am I St. Maria or something? Phone Mimi went missing again Isobel and Anatsa  Sadness But when you lie to me…. It hurts….  Kyle and girlfriend, going to lab Breaking up? Sad Got something she should see Bonnie playing guitar Shivani  Skin alien tissue Max and Liz Hanging out/ making out Kyle calling  Jones is gone Oh dear

Oh my god, this is so good. I miss Alex and Rosa. Poor Anatsa.

Why do they need Jones body? Explained why they needed Eduardo.

[heycolorwind]

New Years Resolutions 2023 | Countdown

Another year, another batch of resolutions. I’ve got the typical ones that I’ll list but there’s really just one I want to do. So let’s count them down! I didn’t do any of the resolutions I said last year so some of these are repeated from last year. Let me know in the comments what your New Years Resolutions are.

Start Writing a Book – I wanted to start this last year but never did. This is something I wanted to really focus on back in 2020 but the pandemic happened and a lot of plans were canceled. This is the year I feel we are officially out of the pandemic so after losing three years, I’m going to try to do things I wanted to do back in 2020 and this is one of the most important ones.

Learn Guitar (again) – I miss the outlet I had from playing music. I think it’ll do my brain good to reintroduce myself to my musical side.

Lose 100 Pounds – I got an exercise bike for Christmas. I think this will help me finally shed the pounds.

Write More – I miss writing so I’ve committed to writing at least once a day, either as a post here on Wordpress or my journal, which I typically ignore.

Get a Stable Writing Job – Once I’ve gotten my bearing writing again, I’m going to use these posts to try to get myself a writing job, particularly one at a publication I would like to work at. This will be my redemption after failing at GameRant.

Get 1000 YouTube Subscribers – My channel has been growing exponentially since last year. I’ve reached 100 subscribers so I would like to see if I can add another zero to that counter.

Socialize More Online / Offline – I need to get out of my comfort zone so I’m going to try to talk to more people, whether that’s on or offline.

Watch 12 Shows – I want to focus on having a good time as well as get influences from other media other than games and music so this goal is so I watch more shows on TV.

Read 12 Books – I’m hoping to read more, especially since I want to write a book so I’m trying to read roughly one book a month.

Finish 40% of the Games I Play – I play a lot of games and last year I easily blew past my 30% or more games finished so this year I’m bumping it up to 40%.

Watch 50 Movies – One movie a week. I don’t watch nearly enough movies and I want to change that. I tried to do this last year but it didn’t last. Attempt number two, I suppose.

Get Back into Comics – I don’t have a solid plan for this admittedly. I guess I’ll just try to read and keep reading series’ that catch my eye. I don’t think looking up new releases is really worth it since it makes more sense to begin at the beginning of the volume or at least the storyline so you know what’s going on. It’s like starting a show on episode 6.

Listen to 50 Albums – I fell out of music last year and desperately tried to catch up most of the year before I just gave up. I’ve decided to focus more on albums rather than singles so that this doesn’t happen again this year. This number, similar to my movies resolution, means I’ll hear about one new album a week.

Make Curated 2023 Playlists – Another way I want to keep up with music is with playlists. I did this back in 2017 and I really like what I did. Making monthly favorite lists and genre lists for the year is fun and I’m going to try to do that again. It’ll be on Spotify FYI. After experimenting with Apple Music and Tidal, I’m going back to Spotify.

Re-Enter The World – This is my big resolution of the year. I’m calling it; we’re officially out of the pandemic. So it’s time to get back out into the world. No more ordering food, I can go get it myself. No more relying on deliveries, I can go to the store and get things myself. I’m still going to wear a mask for the foreseeable future but I’m not going to let that stop me from going places. I’m not a social person to begin with but I still used to go out and do stuff. I want to get back outside and do that again.

[project-offline]

Alexis

It Starts With Hello

Taylen’s point of view on how she met this person.

I first met Alexis in high school when we were in the same homeroom class together. We first bonded over our love for sports, for at the time she was playing hockey competitively and I was playing water polo; we discussed about our busy schedules with practices and how we frequently we left on trips to play at tournaments. I would talk to her every now and then, but I didn’t really get to know her until about 4 years later when we were in the school’s yearbook class together. We shared our love for graphic design and our annoyance with typography as our friendship grew. After we graduated from high school, for a couple months we kept in touch with having a small study group where we had weekly sessions at Starbucks. Although we are no longer studying at Starbucks on frequent occasions, 4 years later today, we continue to keep in touch every week (if not on the daily) and share our love for Marvel, Lord of the Rings and other various shows on Netflix.

This or That

You can only choose one…

Salty or Sweet

Winter or Summer

Air Guitar or Air Drums

Coffee or Tea

Dogs or Cats

Sleeping or Eating // How do I choose?! They’re very close.

Five Facts of Fun

What are 5 facts about yourself?

My favourite hobby is reading.

Working with kids is a big part of my life and my career goal is to be a primary school teacher.

I played a lot of hockey when I was younger and I’ve coached the sport as well.

I have a fear of heights.

I am the eldest of 4 siblings and because of that, it has shaped a lot of my personality.

Drop a Bop

Pick a song that is the theme song to your life and discuss why.

Because "teenagers [do] scare the living [fuck] out of me”. And that's why I want to be an elementary school teacher and not high school kids. I kind of like how it's comical, the way they’re talking about in the song like they were teenagers saying like "you're gonna clean up your looks, with all of your lives in the books, to make a citizen out of you". Because teenagers are such a feared group of people by older people, they took that and were like "yeah... we are scary". While teenagers scare me, I don't think people make enough effort to understand them enough. I just don't want to be the one to do that because they still scare me and I'm worried about it; and I don't think I’m good at it, but they deserve to be treated more like adults.

Debate Time

What is your perspective on the following question: Is the ocean soup?

If you throw a bunch of things into a pot with liquid and you don’t cook it, do you consider that soup? Cause that’s basically my deciding factor. If soup has to be hot… well cause you can have cold soup that started hot and at some point you had to cook it. But yup, I’d say it’s soup.

Some Deeper Small Talk

Chosen from a group of questions, the person answered the following question: What was something mean that was said to me in my childhood that I carry with me to this day? What would I say to my younger self now?

[At the time when I was younger and playing hockey], it was probably some of the various stuff that got said to me in the dressing room... and so I'd probably tell myself well what I’d always used to say to my younger self, which sounds cliche, but “it's going to be fine, it's going to be okay". I think my biggest thing as a teenager was that I was constantly worried and anxious about everything, so I used to always say that to myself to help reassure me.

The Final Spotlight

If you had the final opportunity to say anything to the world, what would you say?

Please, just be kinder to people.

[meruz]

once again i am answering asks in a big compilation post. included is... gotham, patrick stump, tips about drawing backgrounds, tips about drawing in general, links to my faq, and infinity train

like.... the tv series? No... I’ve drawn dc comics fanart before, though. But it’s been years since I’ve been really into it. I like jumped ship like 10 years ago when the New 52 happened LOL.

AFJHDSLKGH I’m sorry I (probably) won’t do it again??

Actually full disclosure I have a truly cringe amount of p stump drawings/photo studies in my sketchbook right now LOL. He’s just fun to draw... hats, glasses, guitar, a good shape... but I don’t think I’ll rly post those until I can hide them in another big sketchbook pdf.. probably Jan 2022. Stay tuned........ (ominous) 

(ominous preview)

These are all sort of related to backgrounds/painting so I grouped them together even though they’re pretty much entirely separate questions.... ANYWAYS

a) How is it working as a BG artist? Is it hard? What show are you drawing for?

I think you’re the first person to ever ask me about my job! Being a background artist is great. It’s definitely labor intensive but I think that could describe pretty much any art job (If something were rote or easy to automate, you wouldn’t hire an artist to do it) and I hesitate to say whether its harder or easier than any other role in the animation pipeline. Plus, so much of what truly makes a job difficult varies from one production to the next, schedule, working environment, co-workers etc. But I will say that I think while BGs are generally a lot of work on the upfront, I think they’re subject to less scrutiny/revisions than something like character/props/effects design and you don’t have to pitch them to a room like boards. So I guess it’s good if you don’t like to talk to people? LOL

A lot of my previous projects + the show I’ve worked on the longest aren’t public yet so I can’t talk about em (but I assure you if/when the news does break I won’t shut up about it). But I’m currently working on Archer Season 12 LOL. I’m like 90% sure I’m allowed to say that.

b) ~~~THANK YOU!! ~~~

c) What exactly do you like to draw most [in a background]?

@kaitomiury​ Lots of stuff! I really like to draw clutter! Because it’s a great opportunity for environmental storytelling and also you can be kind of messy with it because the sheer mass will supersede any details LOL. 

I like to draw clouds... I like to draw grass but not trees lol,,, I like to draw anything that sells perspective really easily like tiled floors and ceilings, shelves, lamp posts on a street etc.

d) Do you have any tips on how to paint (observational)?

god there’s so much to say. painting is really a whole ass discipline like someone can paint their whole life and still discover new things about it. I guess if you’re really just starting out my best advice is that habit is more important than product. especially with traditional plein air painting, I find that the procedure of going outside and setting up your paints is almost harder than the actual painting. There’s a lot of artists who say “I want to do plein air sometime!!” and then never actually get around to doing it. A lot of people just end up working from google streetview or photos on their computer.

But going outside to paint is a really good challenge because it forces you to make and commit to lighting and composition decisions really quickly. And to work through your mistakes instead of against them via undo button.

My last tip is to check out James Gurney’s youtube channel because hes probably the best and most consistent resource on observational painting out there rn. There’s lots other artists doing the same thing (off the top of my head I know a lot of the Warrior Painters group has people regularly posting plein air stuff and lightbox expo had a Jesse Schmidt lecture abt it last year) but Gurney’s probably the most prolific poster and one of the best at explaining the more technical stuff - his books are great too.

e) Do you have tips for drawing cleanly on heavypaint?

@marigoldfool​ UMM LOL I LIKE ONLY USE THE FILL TOOL so maybe use the fill tool? Fill and rectangle are good for edge control as opposed to the rest of the heavy paint tools which can get sort of muddles. And also I use a stylus so maybe if you’re using your finger, find a stylus that works with your device instead. That’s all I’ve got, frankly I don’t think my drawings are particularly clean lol.

f) Tips on improving backgrounds/scenes making them more dynamic practicing etc?

Ive given some tips about backgrounds/scenes before so I’m not gonna re-tread those but here’s another thing that might be helpful...

I think a good way to approach backgrounds is to think of the specific story or even mood you want to convey with the background first. Thinking “I just need to put something behind this character” is going to lead you to drawing like... a green screen tourist photo backdrop. But if you think “I need this bg to make the characters feel small” or “I need this bg to make the world feel colorful” then it gives you requirements and cues to work off of.

If I know a character needs to feel overwhelmed and small, then I know I need to create environment elements that will cage them in and corner them. If a character needs to feel triumphant/on top of the world then I know I need to let the environment open up around them. etc. If I know my focal point/ where I want to draw attention, I can build the background around that.

Also, backgrounds like figure compositions will have focal points of their own and you can draw attention to it/ the relationship the characters have with the bg element via scale or directionality or color, any number of cues. I think of it almost as a second/third character in a scene.

Not every composition is gonna have something so obvious like this but it helps me to think about these because then the characters feel connected and integrated with the environment.

Some more general art questions

a) Do you have any process/tips to start drawing character/bodies/heads?

I tried to kind of draw something to answer this but honestly this is difficult for me to answer because I don’t think I’m that great at drawing characters LOL. Ok, I think I have two tips.

1) flip your canvas often. A lot about what makes human bodies look correct and believable is symmetry and balance. Even if someone has asymmetrical features, the body will often pull and push in a way to counterbalance it. we often have inherent biases to one side or another like dominant hands dominant eyes etc. you know how right-handed artists will often favor drawing characters facing 45 degrees facing (the artist’s) left? that’s part of it. so viewing your drawing flipped even just to evaluate it helps compensate for that bias and makes you more aware of balance.

2) draw the whole figure often. I feel like a lot of beginner artists (myself included for a long time) defer to just drawing headshots or busts because it’s easier, you dont have to think about posing limbs etc. But drawing a full body allows you to better gauge proportion, perspective, body language, everything that makes a character look believable and grounded.

Like if you (me) have that issue where you draw the head too big and then have to resize it to fit the proportions of the rest of the body, it’s probably because you (I) drew the head first and are treating the body as an afterthought/attachment. Sketching out the whole figure first or even just quick drawing guides for it will help you think of it more holistically. I learned this figure drawing in charcoal at art school LOL.

oh. third mini tip - try to draw people from life often! its the best study. if you can get into a figure drawing/nude drawing class EVEN BETTER and if you have a local college/art space/museum that hosts those for free TREASURE IT AND TAKE ADVANTAGE OF IT, that’s a huge boon that a lot of artists (me again) wish they had. though if youre not so lucky and youre sitting in a park trying to creeper draw people and they keep moving.. don’t let that stop you! that’s good practice because it’s forcing you to work fast to get the important stuff down LOL. its a challenge!

b) I’ve been pretty out of energy and have had no inspiration to draw but I have the desire to. Any advice?

Dude, take a walk or something.... Or a nap? Low energy is going to effect everything else so you gotta hit that problem at its source.

If you’re looking for inspiration though, I’d recommend stuff like watching a movie, reading a book, playing video games etc. Fill up your idea bank with content and then give yourself time/space to gestate it into new concepts. Sometimes looking at other art works but sometimes it can work against you because it’s too close. 

Also something that helps me is remembering that art doesn’t always have to be groundbreaking... like it’s okay to make something shitty and stupid that you don’t post online and only show to your friend. That’s all part of the process imo. If you want to hit a home run you gotta warm up first, right? Sports.

I should probably compile everytime i give tips on stuff like this but that’s getting dangerously close to being a social media artist who makes stupid boiled down art tutorials for clout which is the last thing i want to be... the thing I want to stress is that art is a whole visual language and there are widely agreed upon rules and customs but they exist in large part to be broken. Like there's an infinite number of ways to reach an infinite number of solutions and that’s actually what makes it really cool and personal for both the artist and the viewer. So when you make work you like or you find someone else’s work you like, take a step back and ask yourself what about it speaks for you, what about it works for you, what makes it effective, how to recreate that effect and how to break that effect completely, etc. And have a good time with it or else what’s the point.

for the first 2, I direct you to my FAQ

For the last one, I don’t actually believe I’ve ever addressed artwork as insp for stories/rp but I’ll say here and now yeah go ahead! As long as you’re not making profit or taking credit for my work then I’m normally ok with it. Especially anything thats private and purely recreational, that’s generally 100% green light go. I only ask that if you post it anywhere public that you please credit me.

(and I reserve the right to ask you to take it down if I see it and don’t approve of it’s use but I think that case is pretty rare.)

a) @lemuelzero101 Thank you!!! I haven’t played Life is Strange but actually  that series’ vis dev artist Edouard Caplain is one of my bigger art inspirations lately so that’s a really high compliment lol. And yeah I hope we get 5-8 too...!

b) Thank you for sticking around! I’ve been thinking about Digimon and Infinity Train in tandem lately, actually. They’re a little similar? Enter a dangerous alternate world and have wacky adventures with monsters/inanimate objects that have weird powers... there’s like weird engineers and mechanisms behind the scenes... also frontier literally starts with them getting on a train. Anyways if anyone else followed me for digimon... maybe you’d like Infinity Train? LOL

c) @king-wens-king I’M GLAD MY ART JUST HAS PINOY VIBES LOL I hope you are having a good day too :^)

a, b, c, d) yessss my Watch Infinity Train agenda is working....

e) aw thank you!! i think you should watch infinity train :)

[cynical-write]

Tis I again ,,, im loving your writing so much!!! I hope you dont mind me sending more requests! Its okay if it takes time, honestly write when you feel like writing It!

How about something easy like cute fluffy domestic hcs w the mercs?

Your writing is so cool, Keep up the good work!!!

Ahh thank you so much! Seeing all of your kind messages has seriously made my day ❤️

————————————

Scout:

No Surprise to anyone this man loves baseball you can often find him watching it or talking about it, if his S/O ever asks him if they can play he gets so excited he can barely contain himself.

He has a stash of comic books in his room that he likes to read during his days off, his S/O always knows when he gets to an exciting part or if he finds a new comic that interests him because he won't be afraid to find them and excitedly explain everything.

Sometimes this boy still has some energy that he hasn’t burned through so he can't sleep some night. If his S/O is still up he loves to roll over and just talk about whatever is on his mind at that moment until they both finally fall asleep.

Soldier:

Soldier is always ready for battle even on ceasefire days and he wants his S/O to be ready even if they don’t participate in any fighting. It's better to be prepared just in case, so training with his S/O kinda becomes his daily routine.

The second most important person in his life after his S/O is Lieutenant Bites, no matter how feral the raccoon acts towards him he loves to just be able to spend time with the little guy, he tries to convince his S/O to spend some time with Bites but for some reason his S/O always passes on it, oh well.

Pyro:

Pyro is a person of few words but they are a wonderful listener and after a hard day they love to just relax and listen to their lovely S/O talk about their day. Even if their day wasn't the best, just having this little routine makes it all better.

Sometimes during their daily battles they find little trinkets and items they think their S/O would absolutely love, sometimes it's actually really nice items such as a pretty rock that's the same color as their eyes; or a really nice hat they thought would look amazing on them. But other times it's something a little grotesque that kinda got lost in translation in their Pyro vision, it's a mystery what they bring but that kinda adds to the excitement of being their S/O.

Medic:

This man doesn’t get a lot of free time but when he does he loves to just take a moment and relax by spending time with Archimedes, once his S/O has become properly bonded with the bird his favorite pastime quickly becomes spending time with both of them.

Usually when he's in between projects he loves to get his S/O’s opinion on matters even if they may not know much on the matter he loves being able to get an insight in how his S/O feels on whatever their topic may be.

Heavy:

He is an amazing cook and finds it to be a very calming experience that lets him relax and clear his head of any worries that he may have had that day, so it means the world to him when his S/O shows interest in wanting to join him. Even if his S/O isn’t a good cook he still will give them smaller tasks such as peeling potatoes or chopping vegetables. All that matters to him is the quality time he's getting with his loved one.

During his days off when all his other tasks are done he loves to sit back and read a nice book, a lot of it is in Russian so if his S/O can't understand it but is curious about it he won't be afraid to read it out loud to them.

Engineer:

Whenever he finally pulls himself away from his projects he loves to go outside with his guitar and get some fresh air, maybe even play a few songs to pass the time before his self appointed break ends. If his S/O happens to walk by while he's out there he doesn’t hesitate to invite them to sit with him, he may even ask for any song requests.

This man loves to find ways to show he appreciates his S/O, his favorite way is to plan a nice date at home where he gets to cook them dinner of their choice. It just warms his heart seeing how much his S/O enjoys his food.

Demo:

No surprise to anyone, his favorite date spot is bars. He tries not to drink as much as he usually would but he still does get pretty hammered, he's a true lover boy when he's drunk constantly leaning against you and just muttering about how much you mean to him the whole time. Don’t worry he usually takes you on an actual date the next day after he recovers from his hangover.

At night his favorite sleeping position is similar to that of a koala. He is a huge snuggler and just knowing his S/O is nearby helps lull him to sleep within minutes.

Sniper:

Whenever he gets the chance during his days off he loves to just pack up his van and go on a camping trip away from all of the stress. It’s extremely relaxing for him to just camp out in the desert with nobody to take care of besides his S/O and him.

It’s no surprise he tries to talk to his parents as often as he can no matter how much they dislike his profession he still does love them and he has expressed to his S/O how much he actually wants them to meet his parents one of these days.

Spy:

Spy is huge on big romantic gestures and it’s no surprise he loves to dance so sometimes after a long day he would want nothing more than to slow dance with his S/O. If they ever confessed to him that they actually don’t know how to dance then he will be more than happy to teach them.

Being a spy he is insanely good at picking up on little details and storing them away for later use and he mainly uses that skill when outside of work to remember any gifts that his partner would want. Be it a passing glance at some clothes they saw on display or a wishful sigh when looking at the latest tech he remembers and always makes sure to go back and buy it for them.

[hhjs]

forget me not.

♡ based on — "During times of war. I want to say: I only love you, And I cling you, Like the peel clings to a pomegranate, Like the tear clings to the eye, Like the knife clings to the wound." and the song nightlife by daydream masi.

♡ summary  —   Hyunjin's unsure of the tingle in his gut, why it's happening. But he thinks, just for a second, it feels a little like hope.

wherein, putting your heart on the line for the sake of doing favours isn’t a frequent component in your schedule. But what happens when this favour is asked for by the boy you may or may not have fancied for far too long?

 You accept it. 

 For a very embarrassing reason, really, which is — you think Hwang Hyunjin needs you.

♡ pairing— hwang hyunjin x reader

♡ word count— 8.8k whoopsies

♡ genre and alternate universe — angst, fluff + hanahaki au.

♡ author's note— this was supposed to be a drabble and then i sort of lost my fucking mind ehe...also this is easily the worst thing i have ever written im so sorry aaa but this is a lil present from my end hahaha

♡ warnings— suggestive content, vomiting, mention of blood. allusions to depression and heartbreak.

Amongst other things, you're extremely bad at saying 'no'. You don't mean the word per se...but the underlying connotation of this very monosyllable which may come at the expense of letting another person down.

It's sort of stupid, you understand, your friends have constantly voiced their worries for your extremely complacent nature more often than you'd think actually. But it all goes over your head. See — old habits really do die hard.

When you're eight, this very defect takes you to dreadful saxophone lessons your mum spoke so highly of. When you're 15, it gets you called to the principal's office for flashing Jeongin trigonometric functions in Mister Choi's pop quiz, when you're older, things are definitely no different.

The passenger seat is occupied, Hyunjin's holding a tangled muffler to his suede jacket clad chest. At 21, he's become someone you used to know. A friend of a friend, Felix's to be very specific. But the man in question, who was supposed to be his ride, passes off this duty for kegstands and you just happen to be the designated driver for the night, shuffling Jisung beside Changbin and Chan, who claims to be 'sober' even though he's half asleep.

Hyunjin is uncharacteristically quiet.

There's a polite smile on rendered your way as your eyes meet. A small curvature along his plump bottom lip, tighter around the edges. Still this simple formality is so beautiful that you feel something inside you come alive.

When Jisung starts snoring, you flip on the radio and Pink Floyd's Wish You Were Here comes on.

Your fingers feel numb when they come to tap out a rhythm to the track. It's nice. Tingling guitar riffs swelling, David Gilmour's gruffy voice pours in from faulty speakers. The more the song progresses, the more you find yourself attempting to think about anything that will distract you from the boy beside you, in the flesh no less.

So late at night, the main road is eerily silent. Cobblestones reflecting the sound of tires thumping against its layout, streetlights blinking at you from their drooping heads. Across the street, a baker is tucking away leftover bread and buskers are packing up their beat up guitars, a man in his late 50's pulling his blanket to his nose as he rests a head full of gray hair on the cold pavement.

You glance at Hyunjin from the corner of your eye and find that his staggering smile has completely disappeared. Now there's a distant glaze in his eyes. It's like he's here, in this moment, with you, but at the same time, he's somewhere else.

Under the impression you've done something wrong, you immediately begin to panic. But the thing is, you don't actually know if you should ask. Would it constitute as crossing a line if you had anyway?

Hyunjin covers his mouth with a sleeve, muffled retching building beyond fabric.

The reasonable assumption is obvious. It's not abnormal to be nauseous when you've got one too many drinks in you. He motions for you to pull over, incoherent sentences practically melding together, words forming and dissipating between choking fits.

You scramble to dig out a bottle of mineral water you habitually deposit in the glove compartment, offering him the tissue first. Ears perking up in satisfaction when a garbled thanks escapes his parted lips. But then... something weird happens.

As your eyes flicker to unintentionally glance at the contents discarded on the pitch grey sidewalk, you freeze in your seat.

You were never a big believer of superstition, not someone who buys into myths only meant for the fiction genre. Sure, you can be gullible sometimes...but what's happening falls no way under the realistic category.

The lethal Hanahaki disease, only inherited by some unlucky descendants, every moment in your head prior to this one, was something that's obviously non existent.

Yet... there's so much blood, too much blood attesting to your blatant ignorance. The petals are of a white rose, smudging together in swirls of grotesque crimson in mimicry of a sheen of red sticking to the inner corners of his lips. It has happened before, you can tell, from just how unsurprised he looks.

Hyunjin's stare flits to commit every detail of your to memory, in what only seems a quick study of gauging your forthcoming reaction, though even before you can produce a coherent thought, he says,

"You can't tell anyone." His voice drops a few octaves as though he's afraid your snoring friends in the back might've noticed. "Please."

Hyunjin's face softens by the slightest, contrary to his firm demand, there lies a desperation you couldn't overlook.

In retrospect, what you're about to tell is ultimately a promise that'd come back to bite you in due time. However, see now, you're extremely bad at saying no. Somehow you're even worse when it comes to Hyunjin. So you blink, turn the radio off and say,

"Okay."

—

The pool is preheated. For that you're most thankful.

Frankly, you couldn't imagine what it'd be like being pushed into a chilly body of water mid winter. Not that it's pleasant otherwise, you can't swim.

Well at 15, you hadn't quite learned to. The other kids have scurried inside to hog freshly baked Snowman biscuits Seungmin's mum is renowned for.

Then and you think you'll never quite forget it, Hyunjin's wearing an orange power ranger t shirt, it's darker now that it's wet, his glasses are marked with uneven splatters. His face scrunches up at the sudden splash of wetness engulfing his body. He wasn't planning to get in the water.

"Hold on tight." He says, wounding your arms around his neck, your calves tighter to his sides to support your shivering body. Back then Hyunjin's hair was black, cropped short and swept to the side, he smells like fabric softener and skittles. A water donut is discarded in the middle of the pool.

Everybody you know and don't know, from the birth of superheroes stuck in comic books to valiant protagonists behind fuzzy television screens, has this inherent desire to be saved. From the world, from themselves. No, no, it doesn't have to be a grand gesture, swooping them off of their feet from the grasp of surly men in dark alleys, sometimes it's really just simple. Sometimes people save you in the most ordinary way there is.

The weight of your form on his bright pink water donut while he stood on his toes to merely rest his elbows so the item wouldn't flip, a small act, certified this very claim, had not the nimble touch of his cold fingers, brushing away wet hair from your face, to anxiously ask if you're okay met the purpose. He talks to you like the sound of his voice has the power to injure you.

You nod slowly. Like this, it feels like you're going to be.

Hyunjin pouts, looking perfectly unconvinced. He paddles the pair of you to steel stairs spiraling into the pool, so he can stand without just his nose peeking out of the water, he looks at you once again, a wrinkle between his dark, arched eyebrows and says solemnly, "Jisung's such an idiot sometimes, isn’t he?"

But isn't he your friend? You want to ask. Something stops you though —his tone tells you you aren't the only one to fall victim to Jisung's practical jokes. Not that they were offensive or anything. Han Jisung, the same person who twiddles his thumbs when he wants the last chicken nugget and cries every time you watch Howl's Moving Castle together, genuinely doesn't mean any harm. It's just that...when he's comfortable with people, who aren't many, he tends to do a lot of dumb things. Dumb, endearing things that Minho will kill him for someday.

"A little bit," You mumble under your breath. Heat rising to your face at the possibility of Hyunjin being concerned for you. He sounds almost angry. "Thanks by the way."

It's rather pitiful to remember. Because with time, Hyunjin's world becomes so big that your interaction stands to be too insignificant to not forget. Before you know it, he's the shooting guard of your school's basketball team, just a handsome face who dates better girls, makes better friends. It's superficial and a little sad.

No, no, a little sad is an understatement actually.

To see someone you understood intimately, a boy who always described details too much just to stray from the main story, a boy with too many emotions bubbling to an awfully animated surface; someone who was passionate, sensitive and so nauseatingly big hearted...change into a man who is indubitably untouchable...is tragic. At least.

Yet funnily enough — you can't quite imagine a world without Hwang Hyunjin. His ringing laughter rippling through loud ambiences, his distant humming of Christmas carols whilst he absently skimmed through spines of children's novels and his eyes glimmering in adoration whenever he spoke of something he loved — Without him, you imagine, there would be a massive deficiency in your world, in the world. Like if birthday cakes came with the biggest slice carved out.

Hyunjin grins, a big sort of candid grin that turns his eyes into upturned crescents. His previous temperament long forgotten. Suddenly, this utterly atrocious happening seems to not be so bad. Suddenly you don't mind that Jisung is an idiot sometimes.

"Of course."

—

Hyunjin is not perfect. Hyunjin is no prince charming.

People don't know this. They don't understand this.

He ends up paying for dinner when he's out with a big crowd even though they were supposed to split the bill, he ends up crying when he gets angry and he is an abysmal liar, in every sense of the phrase. Hardly ever succeeding to hide his emotions when he should. When he was a kid his parents reminded him that it's a good thing to be unapologetically himself, that being honest is a good thing.

But as your eyes meet from across an ocean of people quagmired by crunchy leaves, sticky remnants of rain and his ex girlfriend who he now claims to be okay with being friends with, on her toes to poke his cheek whilst Chan's arm wraps around her waist, the soft white roses ornamented on a bow she loves wearing all the time, he thinks it's far from an agreeable trait to have.

Actually whilst you balance a newspaper under your arm and bring your coffee to your lips, it's like you're looking through him, past his skin, his flesh, something secret inscribed on his bones, embedded into his soul. You know everything, you know everything, you know everything.

The thought itself... surprisingly enough, doesn't appal him.

Hyunjin raises his palm in the air, feeling the autumn prickling against his skin. He waves at you.

—

Working at a library can be taxing. But it sure has its perks.

You can just about turn the place upside down and put it all back together without getting in trouble. Albeit another reason, besides your profession could be that Minho owns the place. Frankly, he may or may not have been the only cause behind your employment. It's hard to tell now that your co-workers really do recognise you've a knack for arranging things.

But to you, your job is very personal. A precious thing which relieves you from various worldly tensions. Velvety spines under your roughened fingertips, the burst of minted pages hitting your face every time you walk in, your love for reading, for a world of stories is so immense that you think you wouldn't have traded it even if your life depended on it.

For a disease that's not very well known, it's ironic how an entire section of mythology is dedicated to it. Past closing hours, amongst many novels mounted on your desk, you fixate on the one that made most sense. There's a few things you've picked up in common from all of them though — the hanahaki disease is extremely rare, it doesn't affect all those who suffer from the qualms of unrequited love.

Possible remedy according to findings entail

growths can be surgically removed, if the patient consents to eradication of memories of their loved ones.

Clanking of keys alerts incoming and you pause your tapping pen to look up.

"Burning the midnight oil, are we?"

Minho leans against the doorframe, he's half yawning, half talking and fully concerned for you.

"Yeah, looks like I'm gonna be a while." Your monotonous tone provides that you are not paying a lot of attention. You blurt without looking up. "Are you leaving?"

"No, still haven't finished archiving for that Pfizer project...But I'm going to get a bite to eat..." His inky eyes remain on you as his tone falters, "You want anything?"

"I'm fine. Thanks."

"Wow you're like...really uh invested." He tilts his head in thought, "You seeing someone again?"

You know Minho long enough to know he has a teasing side to him, from diaper days to play dates ending in pillow fights because he kept offering you his last Pringle just to pop it into his stupid smirking mouth — but you have no idea where he's going with this.

So you look up, finally. Furrowing your brows.

"No. What does that have to do with anything?"

He shrugs, "I haven't seen you concentrate so hard since you dumped Jeongin."

Your right eye twitches. Because you know exactly what he's referring to, and simultaneously, for the sake of your well-being, you much prefer being in denial. "What?"

"C'mon. Remember how you always ended up doing his homework?" He reminds you. "It's like when you like someone, you go out of your way to do charitable stuff for them. But...this? Too much. Even for you."

You ignore Minho's comment. To the world, Hwang Hyunjin's place in your life is not significant. After all this is the most natural undulation in the vicissitudes of life — for someone who once was your friend to eventually drift apart, to become a has been. It's too hard to explain why you care. After all this time.

"I was just being nice." You narrow your eyes, unimpressed. "Clearly this concept is lost on some people."

"Sure you are, bud. If being 'nice' is synonymous with whipped." Of course, there's a smug grin gracing his pouted lips that tempts you to fling something at him. Not that you can though. Seeing as Minho breaks out into a full fledged sprint, his singsongy voice a thinning echo bouncing off of shelves and windows and doors.

Still somehow his footsteps manage to travel through walls, permeating into your office with such great amplitude that you could be bamboozled into thinking he hasn't left at all. Or maybe you've stopped paying attention, your eyes zoom in on any other helpful detail you can put to use in wrapping your head around what you have witnessed firsthand.

At the same time, you can't really ignore how hungry you're feeling just from the mention of a bite to eat. So when Minho's shadow forms again on the page you've been 'reading' for the last few seconds you sense a gigantic wave of relief washing over you.

"You know what I changed my—" slamming the book shut, you blink against scanty provision of light, with raise your head and a bleary vision, recognise him in an instant. Except...it isn't Minho. "mind..."

The only source of brightness is a small emerald lamp perched on the corner of your desk, light green catches onto one of the ornamented corners and speckles of golden caress his supple skin gently. You hadn't realised how cold it might've been outside until you see how heavily dressed Hyunjin was, a long overcoat worn over woollen sweater, a Santa hat and muffler pulled to his chin. It's no one other than your boss himself who has given him directions to your office, you know this, Hyunjin has never been inside before.

So when he marvels absently, you sense yourself feeling a little self conscious about not cleaning up. All around you, a comforter and love seat pushed against the window, cigarette butts discarded in ashtray and then...the books strewn before you tell him you practically live here.

For some reason, Hyunjin only seems to loosen up at the spectacle.

"Hi." He says finally.

"Hi..." you arrange the reading materials quickly to one side so you can rest your elbows. A small (successful) attempt made to hide your research. "Something up?" You say, but what you really mean is, what are you doing here?!

Did he suspect you were going to tell on him? Right that's it, that must be it, you tell yourself, believing, knowing, of all the years Hwang Hyunjin has known of you he has never been one to care about your whereabouts.

"I just...um," He starts, forwarding his mitten clad hands. It's the back of a crumpled coffee cup on which straight handwriting reads a bucket list...of sorts. You immediately understand that his coming is an act of impulse. Urgency of living every moment like it's slipping through it's fingers, that he just needed to tell the only person who knows, be it by accident.

Hyunjin clears his throat. "I wanna do all this before I die."

In lieu of giving an instant response, baffled, you gawp at him. Despite knowing, hearing Hyunjin say it out loud somehow makes everything...too real.

It's as though someone's reached inside your throat, pulled your heart out and crushed it with their bare hands. Hyunjin, the boy who smelled like fabric softener and skittles and wore power ranger shirts, the boy with the fantastic smile and cold fingers, is dying. You won't let him. You can't let him.

You thumb along the numbers scribbled in hasty penmanship, look up and blink rapidly, "Okay," you say, a small whisper, barely there words. "That's okay."

Even with the hat covering tips of ears, you could tell the same faint blush coating his cheeks had rushed to that particular area. His eyes drift off to the sight of pens discarded inside a wooden holder because he can feel your gaze on him. "and I...I need your help."

"Alright."

Hyunjin's eyes widen to a great degree, he sits straighter, as if he hadn't expected you to comply so quickly.

And honestly? Neither had you.

It's quiet. Awkward.

"You know it's not like I haven't thought about dying. I just figured I'd get to grow old first, settle down, have kids and all that," A wry laugh escapes his parted lips. "Everything's happening too fast."

You hesitate, thinking he's making a mistake. Frankly he shouldn't feel obligated to give you an explanation.

"You...you don't have to tell me."

"No—I mean...can I?" He gives you a sheepish look, disliking his own whimsical tone, somehow endearing still. You find yourself wondering how long he had to keep his burdens to himself, not just pertaining to his illness, but everything. His dreams, his hopes, his fears. Anything which requires a certain amount of depth. And you almost ask him, the question sitting at the tip of your tongue, yet the realisation rather simple, stops you. Maybe you've mistranslated 21 year old Hyunjin all along — moulding himself into someone who's convenient around people who only liked him for who he appeared to be, maybe even with all that popularity, parties and glamour, he's just...lonely.

You push your reading glasses into your hair, press your knuckles under your chin and hum in consent.

He shifts in his seat, "Have you ever... been in love?"

You release an amused huff. Let your eyes linger on him for a long minute.

"Once."

Hyunjin half expects you to laugh. Poke fun at him for his melodramatic backstory. That's the sole reason why he doesn't tell his friends (funny, for people he considers close, they seem to know not much about him or care to know, that is. ). But you... you look at him with something in your eyes that tells him the rubbish reasons he posited makes all the sense in the world. Hyunjin's unsure of the tingle in his gut, why it's happening. But he thinks, just for a second, it feels a little like hope.

—

 Midnight rendezvous.

As someone who has lived a fairly extraordinary life, Hwang Hyunjin's bucket list is bafflingly ordinary. He's more of a finding joy in small things kind of a person, punctilious at best.

Things change. People notice. They hesitate, whisper about you and last night while you were out on last minute cheap wine run, the grocerer, a girl who looks around sixteen asks you if you're dating Hyunjin. Underneath the thinly veiled curiousity, there's something like anger dripping from her words.

You furrow your eyebrows in simple insinuation that it's weird for a stranger to take interest in your life. Maybe it was written on your face, the fact that you're a dying man's beck and call is for reasons far more complicated than it looks.

You go to his parties. Greet him as a friend would and not just for the sake of maintaining formalities. He comes to the library more times than he does, waits for you to get off work so you can check something off the list at least. People notice. People understand. Hyunjin's different around you. He's bright, talkative when he forgets to contain himself. You sense your heart swelling with pride just at the understanding that he can be himself around you.

You drive to the beach, sit in your trunk and drink straight out of the bottle.

Hyunjin laughs a little. Suspends his feet in the air. With time, he's gotten paler, exhausted. "Rough day?"

You hum.

"Very. Our children's collection is usually low in stock around the weekends."

Hyunjin crosses his arms over his chest. Curious.

"And?"

"And if I say I got yelled at by a toddler would you believe me?"

Hyunjin feigns contemplation, even with the realisation that his body is becoming less and less cooperative, he manages to remain perfectly cheerful.

"I can actually," he grins, "At that age, I was a real pain in the ass."

"Were?"

Your smile is just a slight curl against the bottle's mouth as he grumbles under his breath about your 'insensitive' remark.

You think of your life after Hyunjin, think of his absence like a gaping hole you'll never be able to fill out. It makes you sick to your stomach.

—

Bake something from scratch.

Hyunjin's face twists in apparent thought, eyebrows rising. A pink tongue poked against his cheek, whilst he chews carefully, trying really hard not to flash an accidental reaction whilst you clasp your butter and oat flour soiled hands together, some of the batter on your cheek, neck to anticipate his answer like your will to live depends on it.

You ask yourself how it got to this. Why you didn't care that you were awake so early on a Sunday morning with flour powdering every kitchen appliance in sight in spite of being awfully restrictive about who you let into your kitchen. But it doesn't matter, it doesn't matter because it's nice like this.

Hyunjin has his hair pulled away from his bare face, a mole under his eye, a small birthmark on the back of his ear.

When you first met, you thought he was a kind of handsome that couldn't be real. Something formidable about it. Only destined to exist behind fuzzy television screens and flashy magazines.

But in retrospect, you realise, that that's not true at all. 

If you look close enough, if you really pay attention, there's a softness underneath, something goofy, something warm, the sharp jut of his nose circling into a soft button, his eyes are big, black and his mouth jutted out into a natural pout, he looks innocent, like he doesn't quite realise the extent of his charms.

"It's..." His soft voice pulls you out of your reverie, and you look up to find his eyes glimmering jovially. Every time it surprises you, the lack of regret in them and the abundance of nonchalance. You wonder what it means to love someone like that, to love someone to the point of martyrdom. It shouldn't be like this. "perfect,"

"This is like, the only batch we didn't burn, right?"

You snort, "Yeah." Fully turn to him, "You know what they say, fifth time's the charm."

Hyunjin's laugh, you think, is so contagious that it makes it an imperative to smile in return. In shaky compartments the sound comes, like being 8, laying wide-eyed in a paddling pool and staring up at a crayon blue sky, raindrop rippling beyond all that noiseless water. His eyes curve to upturned crescents, an unconscious hand covering up the seams of his lips whilst he shakes his head. You don't even notice when he starts speaking again.

"Huh?"

"I said you got a little...something..."

You almost lose a fraction of your sanity when his nimble fingers come to wrap around your wrist while you hold onto the spatula employed into the whole snickerdoodle batter mixing business, a liberated hand coming up to gently wipe your cheek. It means everything to you. And nothing to him.

Later, when you're alone at night, really alone, you put your palm to your chest and feel the unsteady beat of your heart. A warning, a reminder. I can't. I can't. I can't.

—

You hold Hyunjin's hair up. His hands resting on the cold toilet seat, he's whimpering and bleeding. It happens every time he sees Haseul, or something which reminds him of her. Like the song.

This time she's drunk. And it's because she impulsively rises to her toes and presses a tender kiss to Chan's lips.

Hyunjin's just a feet away, across students and solo cups and streaks of neon falling irregularly through his line of sight.

He can never confess, not to her. The last thing Hyunjin wants is for her to feel bad for him. To say she feels the same as an act of service. He tells you. You understand. Somehow... you always understand.

They met in college, Hyunjin and she. And Chan was an upperclassman who seemed to be good at...well everything. At first, he couldn't figure out why it never occured to him before, the fact they were getting together maybe before, after or during the length of their relationship.

Though the answer is simple.

Hyunjin thinks the pillar to good relationships is trust. Call him a sappy romantic or whatever but he had seen true love manifest from it through generations before him and his parents and their parents. To think a different fate was woven for him...used to be unimaginable.

How ironic is that?

Hyunjin presses his cheek against your chest because he doesn't want you to look at him when he cries.

Then for the first time....he tells you he's scared. He's scared of what will happen to him. Of what is happening to him.

He's falling apart.

You cradle him, press him closer to your body like you're trying to put him together. People can't fix each other. Not really. But sometimes... they're worth the try.

"Hey...hey...it's alright," You shush him, run your fingers through his hair. Your voice almost breaking, faltering. Still this, this you mean it with every fibre of your being. "It's okay to be scared."

—

Self bleach hair.

It's Christmas and you're late for a late night dinner he's putting together. (As reluctant as he was about getting along with Hyunjin, he seems all too eager to make invite him whenever a get together takes effect.)

His apartment smells like floor cleaner. There's a queen sized bed pushed against an electric blue wall, a Fleetwood Mac poster taped to his door, small reading desk where Canon EOS New Kiss rests, polaroids of things checked off the list littered all its wooden surface.

You pick up the only photo he hasn't labelled, it reminds you that your friendship isn't just based off a pursuit. This is natural. Pizza box discarded between you two, on your roof top. It's a little too dark, you're holding a cigarette between your fingers, you're laughing and Hyunjin looks like he's going to complain the minute he's done taking the picture. (And he does.)

You smile, pressing your fingers against it like the touch could transport you to a simpler time.

"Ready to go?"

Hyunjin rakes a tentative hand through his newly dyed hair, grey (a suitable colour he says.). You can tell he's put a lot of effort into cleaning up, his usual hoodies and sweats alternated with a red satin shirt tucked into dark dress pants and a coat of the same colour.  Hyunjin is beautiful. Perhaps even more like this. In fact, the extent of this quality is so Goliath-like that it obliges dolled up attendees to marvel up in awe.  While you fully agree with their unsaid ponderings, you really do, you find yourself missing a less sophisticated version of him. 

"Yeah, but first..." you fish out a wrapped squarish material from the depths of your pocket. Hyunjin's eyes widen, two bunny-like teeth showing for the extent of his grin.

"You got me a present!" He all but rips it out of your hand, shaking the material eagerly. He’s a Christmas person, a supreme holiday enthusiast if you will. The sheer excitement in him projects itself in every physical aspect possible. Slight jumping on the balls of his feet. "It's a cassette...?"

You speak too much, nervous he doesn't like it. "It’s a Christmas mix. I thought...since you like carols. I know it's a little old school, I'm sorry if that’s not what you were hoping for—"

Hyunjin pulls you into a big hug, wrapping his entire body it feels like; his arms around your waist, he squeezes you tighter against him, "Thank you." He whispers into your hair, it's not just about the cassette, you can tell. 

There's a small light bulb dangling from his ceiling, he hasn't fixed it since the first time you pointed it out. You can tell with your eyes closed, you've begun to know more intimately than your own home. It's safe here. A place that deludes you into thinking that he's not running out of time, that even in his absence in the world, whenever you should walk into this room, it would be an imperative to find Hyunjin lazying about in its confines. Familiarity can be quite tricky, can't it?

His gratitude is not unknown to you. It's in the guilty smile that threatens to show every now and then, it's in this and it's in that. In many ways, it is not something you're a stranger to.

And yet the words manage to tears your heart at the seams. Just a little.

—

 Make a snow angel.

From above, he imagines, he may appear to look like a chunk of cookie dough in an ice cream pint.

The snow is not as comfortable as it appears, its frigid temperature seeps into Hyunjin's clothes (and what feels like his internal organs, if that's even possible). He waves his hands and legs inward, outward.

Your head tilts towards him. Face twisted in annoyance. "You're getting on my wing!" You say. "Have you no respect for personal space?!"

Hyunjin narrows his eyes jovially. And people tell him he's the one with a penchant for theatrics. He leans closer in rebuttal, waving his leg around your design with more purpose.  You give up. Sit on your knees, fumble with the snow. He’s still in the same position. Smug as ever...

"This is what happens when you disrespect your elders." He fake-warns. "Oka—"

What he doesn't anticipate, however, is the snowball you launch on his stupid grinning face. Now it's your turn to laugh. You clutch your stomach and point at him whilst he glares at you having barely managed to blow the snow off of his mouth.

"Oh, you're gonna get it now!"

You let out an animalistic screech, Hyunjin’s already trapped you under his weight, his thighs wound around your waist, hamstringing your plan to escape, now you're merely squirming. His fingers come down to attack your sides, digging into the flesh so mercilessly to the point you’re not sure if you’re laughing or crying. It's like there's a wildfire inside your lungs.

For a moment you forget, you let yourself forget what's to come.

“Alright, alright I’m sorry!” you press your palms against his chest in an attempt to push him off, Hyunjin has a dumb smile on his face that seems to give the impression of a hanger  stuck inside his mouth. But... there's something behind his entertainment as the sound of his laugh dies down, chest heaving with exercise. His smile drops.

You can count each lash, each freckle and line on his face. The dark in his eyes. The pink of his lips. Your sweater's ridden to your ribs. And the warmth of his fingers shifting against your bare skin hits you with an earthshattering force.

Hyunjin kisses you. For a fleeting second, you freeze. Rigid with shock. Then it passes as soon as it comes.

 You let out a noise of content,indubitably grateful that your neighbours forgot to put on their porch light for the night.  See it’s like this, the act of kissing is not as special as is the person himself, you muse, you can kiss anyone, you can touch and be touched by anyone. But none of that truly compares to this. Not when they aren't him.

You’d be lying if you said you never thought about it. Just like you’ve thought about a lot of things. But just the realisation that the boy you’ve harboured in your heart for more complicated reasons than you disclose, to yourself even, touches you with so, so much care...it’s tearing you apart. 

It’s too good to be real.

You suddenly push him away. The tugging and pulling at your heart too much to handle. For the fact remains — Hyunjin doesn't love you. He doesn't even like you. You never expected him to. Actually, you've never felt what you feel with that condition in mind either.

See when the feeling of having everything you could ever want is cradled between your palms...it ought to be hard to let go. (Maybe he’s just doing this because he feels bad for you, the little voice in your head says. You listen.)

Hyunjin speaks up first.

“I love Haseul.”  he tells you, but it sounds more like he’s telling himself. “That’s why...that’s why, all this...I love her.” Not you.

You swallow, “I know.” Your hands come up to dust your pants. Hyunjin’s still on his knees, as if the answer to his conflicts are deposited under all the snow. “It’s okay.”

“No, it’s not, it’s not okay. I shouldn’t have, I shouldn’t have done—”

Now you hear it, the hint of pity in his voice. You don’t mean to sound as bitter as you do. Seeing as you’re usually very good at keeping calm , breaking that very reputed front frustrates you even more.

“Look just forget about it, okay? We don’t have to talk about this.”

Hyunjin looks like he didn’t expect this side of you to exist. At least, you think, at least it got him to stop talking.

—

Learn to skate.

"If I fall, I'm taking you with me."

"You say it like I have a choice."

Hyunjin shoots you a warning glare even though you can't see. His choppy skidding steps supported by the vice grip he has on your arms. You haven't skated since you were in highschool. But when you're pretty good at it still, the smooth blade of your beaten skates gliding through ice with much dexterity, it's like floating, freeing, the wind hitting your faces, snow catching in your lashes. It's peaceful, you try not to think about the warmth of Hyunjin's arm circling around body, the vague rhythm of his heartbeat against your back. His laboured breaths on your neck. It's torturous. But spending so much time with him has taught you to hide your feelings better.

The park welcomes a large crowd around holiday season, children with toothless grins, tugging onto their mum's coats, small chin resting onto a parents' head, teenagers moving in together in school uniforms. It's the happiest time of the year. When you move past an elderly couple, they smile and tell you make a wonderful couple.

You're just about to make a correction. This puts you in an awkward position... doesn't it?

But then Hyunjin grins toothily and says, Thank you, like it's the most amusing thing in the world. You ignore the wrenching inside your chest.

Hyunjin leans forward, his plump lips brushing against your ear. "Where did you learn to skate so well?!" There's something like excitement in his kiddish laugh aside from admiration. It's not much of a question as it is an exclamation.

"I am pretty good, aren't I?"

He laughs, doesn't let you go. "Yes, yes...really good."

Out of breath, you slow down, move your feet steadily, careful not to lose balance.

"Oh my God! It is you!"

You raise your head, blink against flakes hindering your vision. Jeongin's voice used to be thinner before. As far as you remember. Now it has a weight to it.

You let out a nervous laugh.

"And it's you..."

Jeongin's eyes travel to the arms around your waist, to the stiffened figure behind you and you immediately liberate yourself. Moving to let Hyunjin use your arm as purchase, you don't fail to notice the pinch in his forehead, a frown on his mouth.

"This is my friend Hyunjin. Hyunjin, this is Jeongin—"

"We used to go out." Jeongin smiles, forwarding his hand, which is returned with an unenthused shake and a demure reply. Hyunjin never speaks to anyone this way, not even people he claims to hate.

The former male looks to you again, "I was, uh... wondering if you'd like to go out for a cup of coffee sometime."

Things between you and him ended amicably at the event of his departure for further studies, which deprives you of awkward tension which is expected when exes meet.

Besides, a cup of coffee never hurt anyone.

Right?

Without thinking, you nod slowly, "Yeah that sounds good,"

"Text me anytime."

"Sure."

 “I'll be out of your hair then," he beams. "It was very nice meeting you too, Hyunjin."

"Right."

Hyunjin, you realise, has released your arm. He leans on barricades fencing along the skating area, smiling briefly. You know it’s wrong...yet you sense that you almost need him to be upset.

Then he tilts his head back towards you, "He seems like a really nice guy," he whispers, genuinely meaning every word. Your heart sinks. "I see the appeal." Underneath the lurid glare of fairy lights brandished overhead, Hyunjin's ash hair glints like it's threaded out of silver. You wonder what he's thinking.

—

 Watch every Disney movie ever made.

You never end up texting Jeongin back. Just stalling for when you're ready, you tell yourself. Even though that's not true at all.

"This brings back so many memories. My parents used to belt out A Whole New World with me, like every time we watched Aladdin."

Hyunjin wipes his face with the back of his hand, technically you’re not very sure what he’s saying exactly because he’s mumbling into a paper napkin you've  passed over for the umpteenth time. You find yourself picturing a small but happy family of three, of Hyunjin in Scooby Doo pajamas and gap between his teeth. (Contrary to your previous convictions, he hasn't changed all at much, save for the teeth bit. ) It's cute.

He looks to you expectantly. Can't be the only one telling embarrassing stories.

You shrug, "I had a thing for Simba. Let's just say my mum and dad were nice enough to indulge me."

Hyunjin reaches for the remote and pauses the ending credits of Lady and the Tramp. He turns to you fully now, gives you a judgemental stare. "Simba...?" He says, "Like the...lion?"

"What? It's normal to crush on fictional characters, okay?!"

"Okay,sure," Hyunjin snorts, putting a pillow between you and him so you can't kill him. "furry."

A part of you is tempted, obviously. But the much bigger part is more invested in how he looks happier, healthier. You want to think that means something.

—

Hyunjin invites you over for movie night. It's getting colder and you keep poking him with your cold feet. There's an extra set of blankets in his cupboard, he informs you, he isn't sharing his with you — and that's when you see it.

The deflated pink donut folded to the side, his and yours sharpie inscribed initials on one side. 

"Found it yet?"

You don't even notice when he comes to stand behind you. So the question effectively makes you jump out of your skin. Hyunjin has a bowl of popcorn pressed to his chest, there's a pink hair band holding his hair away from his forehead. For the lack of a answer he takes it on himself to find the source of your silence. As if you've been caught red handed.

You think this is where he'll ask you to leave, that or he'll least scold you or something. You prepare for the worst.

Hyunjin just smiles, it's a big smile that succeeds in bringing out the small dimple indented on the side of his cheek. You've never noticed before. It's kinda weird. Because when it comes to him, your attention hardly ever falters.

"You probably don't remember. That’s from Seungmin's 15th birthday,"

You want to scoff under your breath. All this time you had told yourself that you were the only one to be affected by your estranged friendship growing up. Now...the same logic colours you every bit of ridiculous. 

You blink away, swallowing. Voice solemn.

"I remember." Hyunjin's gaze is heavy on your shoulders. An emotion you can't quite put a finger on crosses his delicate features. It's something between surprise and relief... something else too. You don’t understand it. 

—

It's disconcerting that he can’t remember the last time he got sick. Not the usual discomfort inside his chest, not the blood, not the thorns or petals. Hyunjin's just gotten so used to it, you know? What if he gets his hopes up for no good reason? What if it just comes back?

There's no possible explanation, he explains over a hasty 3 A.M message he had to leave on your answering machine because he's freaking out.

Then Haseul texts Hyunjin, tells him she misses him. Everything's adding up. Everything's falling into place. This is what he wanted, isn't it? She loves him, she finally loves him back. That must be it. He doesn't know what to say. 

But he tells you, and when he does, it sounds a lot like an apology.

— 

Kiss underneath a mistletoe. 

“Chan and I broke up.” She says it like it’s something he should be happy about. So when he remains quiet, it only prompts her to speak more, fill up the big mighty silences. 

“I’m sorry to hear that.”

“Look Jinnie, I know I made a mistake, but...can’t you give a second chance? Just this once?”

Hyunjin has thought about this particular moment a lot. Kissing her instead of producing a response, pulling her off of her feet and mumbling of course, of course, of course. Back then, there were little doubts in his head pertaining to her, back then he believed that she was the only one for him. The love of his life at the wrong time, in the wrong place.

Now...something doesn’t feel right. 

The thing about wounds, sometimes, of the heart in particular, is when they close up, it’s hard to make head or tails of the kind of person you become in their wake. Hard to adjust. Like when he suddenly shot up 7 inches in ninth grade, a late bloomer at that, and the weight of his new sneakers felt..odd.

He glances at her and also understands what it’s like to be lonely, the constant need to compensate for it by grasping at the last straw. He used to be in her shoes too. This isn’t any different.  Albeit, he isn’t exactly taken by her presence. Just that he doesn’t know if what he’s doing is right. He looks over your table a few feet away from where he’s standing. Having gone out to take a call. You notice his absence and then from your seat, do your best to locate him. (he thinks of kissing you on a bed of snow, thinks of the sizzle of your skates against ice, thinks of his list on a coffee cup and his pink water donut and it’s okay to be scared. Why did it have to be you of all people, through everything? It’s not really a work of coincidence. Not at all actually.

  Maybe he just wanted it to be you.)

When your eyes do lock...seeing him with his hands in his pockets, her standing beyond the barrier as she tries to say something, you smile, even if it’s a little sad. Hyunjin thinks to the conversation some nights before. Thinks of you reminding him that there's nothing to lose at this point, that he should do what his heart tells him. That it’ll be alright, if he just takes a leap of faith. Hyunjin smiles back. Through the glassy exterior and mini water fountains running down its slanted form. The realisation is not as dramatic as he thought. It’s just late.

 He tears off the false mistletoe decoration glued along the periphery of an arch.

And like always.

He takes your advice.

— 

Cohorts of guests pour into the colossal hotel, heads turning in quiet admiration for bejeweled arches breaking out against buttery white architecture, the roof is impossibly naked, translucent glass baring a starlit sky to your watchful eyes. Showing little mercy to a frail chute held over your head,costumed characters wade through oceans of gossamer, twinkling silver and swaying movements to slow jazz. You prop a heeled foot up on the bar platform, which strangely resembles a pedestal, in a futile attempt to catch your breath, with clammy digits settled atop the risky surface of a marbled counter. A soft voice speaks over the ambience, uttering your name with much care. You lift your head. And there he is.

Jisung is scouring through the Spotify playlist you’ve put together for New Year’s Eve. He’s complaining about the lack of Beyoncé while your friends go around the buffet table. When he calls you, you’re sipping your drink, laughing at something Changbin is saying, his eyes brighten just at the sound of your laugh.  Hyunjin isn’t surprised to see his friend taking a liking of you even though he hardly knows you. That’s just the effect you have on people.

Excusing yourself, you allow him to walk you to a less densely populated area where a stone pillar faces expensive paintings of nameless painters. With the effect of alcohol settling in and your inhibitions effectively lowered, your steps sway a little. You lean against the massive build rising from tiled floor. “So what’s up?” you murmur, the lump in your throat thickening just at the thought of him speaking the good news into existence. “I take it went well?”

 Hyunjin doesn't answer. He looks distracted for a bit. Then in an instant he snaps out of his daze. “What did you mean when you said ‘once’?”

Your brows come together in inquiry.

“What?”

"When I asked you if you have ever been in love, you said ‘once’." He persists, his fingers come up to your shoulder, grazing slightly as if they’re trying to carve out words against the skin. "You weren’t talking about Jeongin.”

He knows. He’s always known. Hyunjin can’t believe he’s been so stupid.

“Took you long enough.” You let out a sardonic laugh.“Well, it doesn’t matter now, does it?”

"It matters to me..." Hyunjin sounds offended, you gather, but he manages to quell his temper for the sake of coaxing your confession. Is he purposely embarrassing you?  "I don’t think...I love Haseul anymore...I didn’t realise...I haven’t for a long time."  

A big chandelier beams over withering plants pushed against the ceiling, in this poor supply of light, you can tell exactly how he looks, eyes glimmering adoringly, you've spent something-teen years of your life wondering what it's supposed to mean. And it still manages to confuse you.

"Why are you telling me this?" you ask, albeit you already know.  Because funnily enough, before he got his braces removed and dyed his hair a scandalous blonde, before bucket lists and heartbreak, he was just the boy who told you he liked your stupid reindeer sweater even though it had officially made you the 7th grade laughing stock. You remember being fifteen and in love with Hyunjin. And you've never actually stopped. You need to hear it to believe it.

It drives you crazy. The way Hyunjin brushes his fingers against your cheek, shifting strands away from your eyes. But you can't help it, you've always wanted this. You lean into the caress, peering up at him as his large hand cups your jaw, thumb traversing from your tilted chin to your glossy lips like he's trying to smooth out all the creases. His voice is small, a whisper.

"Because I need you to know I think I’m falling in love with you.” he says. His palm opens and there’s a plastic mistletoe nestled between his fingers. You’re smiling and sniffling whilst his forehead comes to press against yours. Hyunjin grins. “And there’s still one last item on my list.”

“Are you seriously asking me to land one on you now?”

“Oh hell yeah.”

— 

"Move."

You press your fingers against the slick, sweaty skin.

In rebuttal, Hyunjin grumbles under his breath. Only half awake, half aware that he was mumbling in his sleep. His naked chest seems to be, if it’s even possible, glued to your bare front as he sprawls out like a starfish over your body, using his gangly arms to accommodate the strange position.

Though and you know he knows it too — it’s anything but uncomfortable.

See by now, you aren't exactly a stranger to Hyunjin's sleeping habits. Or really, any habits of his.

All the windows are cracked open, moonlight percolating through a thin sheet of curtains in rendering evidence that it’s still night time. You can make out the faint sound of  honking in the distance, a few stray dogs here and there, probably producing strings of complaints about the blatantly unbearable heat.

The strong stench of sweat and an aftermath of what happened before is a quick reminder of where you are, what you’re doing and that your arm’s going cold for a lack of circulation under his weight. Beads of sweat collected against his skin and trickle down the side of your face, the crook of your neck, which only prompts you to apply more force to the pads of your index and pointer — albeit it did nothing to move him, "Gross." You groan. "You're sweating like a pig!"

This comment, of all the things you've tried to get him to sleep on his side, succeeds in making Hyunjin raise his head, his grey hair matted down, a few rogue strands pushed out to fall over the unamused look in his eyes.

In an unprecedented minute of absolute clarity, something inside your stomach started to churn at the shocking sight. You’re impossibly, absolutely and nauseatingly in love with Hwang Hyunjin and the funny thing is, you don’t have to think twice to know he is too.

"Gross?" Hyunjin lowers his face to brush his pouted lips along your jaw, grinning when you let out a shaky but involuntary breath and as if he is looking to make a point with his digits traversing from your bare stomach, just along the hem of your underwear,   "After all that?"

"I hate you." You say — but more like, stutter. The sound of his giggles eliciting a strange sensation in you, reverberating against your chest, knocking against his ribs and your skin, like it’s trying to reach out to you, like your bodies insist on melding into one.

"I don’t think you’re being honest, baby." He laughs, squeezing your side, coming up to plant a warm palm to your butt to repeat the action, which in turn, drew a mewl from you. “Because you looove me.” Hyunjin smirks, his finger thumbing along your throat to your chin. You think this is what all those great poets meant in endless litanies of lovers torn apart by time and war woven together in a simple caress, like a longing, like a secret. Guarded from prying eyes, greedy hands, and you keep it, you keep it. For him. With him.

[http-konoha]

haikyuu!! as questionable classmates headcanon pt. 2

as always, these might not make sense <3

here is pt. 1 (karasuno) and  pt. 3 (nekoma, fukurodani) !!

AOBA JOHSAI

oikawa

would have weird scribbles on his arms, and sometimes on his face. he often falls asleep in class and his friends, specifically iwaizumi hanamaki and matsukawa, would do a game of ‘who would wake oikawa first’. poor oikawa he was tired from practicing all night and would not realize the weird, inappropriate drawings until he saw some girls stared at his arms instead of his face.

iwaizumi

during self study, he would roll up his sleeves and start doing sit ups or pushups when he gets too frustrated to study. would recommend running around the school for 5 laps as a fun activity to do together as a class (sometimes when he’s nice he’d suggest a ‘fun, safe’ volleyball match)

matsukawa

that kid who would randomly giggle deep, manly giggles during literature class because he read a word and remembered an inside joke he and his friend made. also it feels weird if he stays radio silent throughout class. 

hanamaki

that friend and they’d make eye contact with each other every now and then. hanamaki would randomly throw in tiktok moves and outdated vine quotes and dances when he presents. he’s nervous and would unconsciously do so. watch him throw it back while presenting his opinion to whether or not death penalty is acceptable.  

yahaba

eats his lunch in class. he picked fights and was sent to the teacher’s room at least once in three months because he would disagree with the teachers and end up arguing with them. yahaba somewhat gets good grades so the teacher gave in and lets him do whatever he wants in class.

kunimi

hacked into the school system and exposed the pe teacher for having an affair with the janitor. this isn’t that questionable oops he blackmailed the pe teacher with money and the choice to skip running laps in exchange of taking the news down. unfortunately the whole school knows about the affair. 

kindaichi

kunimi pansted kindaichi during lunch time, revealing his bright yellow minion boxers. now people would call kindaichi minion onion head.

kyotani

ate a few pages from his english dictionary because he genuinely thought that it would absorb the words to his brain for the exams. also he thought nobody would realize, but he has a small pink notebook where he would journal. in the middle of class. 

watari

he has a rather small bag, but when he gets to school you see him pull out his textbooks, a volleyball, lunch bag, a whole banana branch, a huge jar of condiments (ketchup and mayo), his volleyball uniform, a full first aid kit box, and occasionally you can hear purrs and meows from his bag... 

DATEKO 

futakuchi

his locker is a very popular spot because he would bring a bunch of items like snacks, comic books, stationary, printed homework/revisions, and sell them to other students as if he’s dealing. he is somewhat surprised that the teachers haven't called him to the office, but futakuchi doesn’t care because he’s getting money.

aone

as soon as the bell rings signalling that class ended, he would dash and run outside. it’s to talk to the teacher to go over the things he doesn’t understand in class. but it’s just interesting to see how aone would look like he’s ready to commit arson when class ends.

koganegawa

brings everything else to school except his stationary. he keeps forgetting to bring his pencil case and would ask the people around to lend them to him. at this point you’re all convinced that futakuchi stole his pencil case and tricked poor koganegawa to buy them from him. 

SHIRATORIZAWA

ushijima

colorcodes his textbooks and notebooks accordingly. also has a picture of his beloved cactus plant in a4 size, right on the very of of his folder stack that everyone can see. like watari, he carries a volleyball in his bag. 

tendou

sometimes shows up to school with ridiculous accessories. one time he wore the colorful clown wig, the next day showed up with his right hand completely wrapped up like kaidou shun, and once he showed up with his hair down with two pink antennas and green tinted glasses. it’s surprising how he never got told off by the teachers maybe because he’s living in an anime world or the teachers just love to see what he’d do next.

reon

he isn’t weird, he’s just misunderstood. bby is actually soft and loved by everyone because he would share cookies to his classmates. sometimes you catch him watching twice music videos and live performances during breaktime. 

shirabu

has a one, big binder for each subject and it’s super heavy. you can hear him pant after carrying the binders. he only has 1 pencil and 3 set of pens in black, blue and red. he’s at the top of his class but no one would ask him to share his notes because his handwriting is awful. tiny but long, cursive awful. 

semi

takes art instead of music class as an elective, yet you’d see him with a music textbook. he would also bring his electric guitar to school although he’s in the volleyball club. he wants to appeal to people that he has a hobby outside volleyball, poor bby

kawanishi

brings two water bottles to school everyday. convinces everyone that one is just plain water and the other one is juice to wake him up. yeah no, one of them has liquor mixed in it, you just know. sometimes he’d collect the monster energy drink cans and line them up in his locker as a decoration. you’ll see at least 5 cans a week.

goshiki

would secretly look up nude roman and greek statues on the school’s computer because of the filtered internet. i have nothing else to say

[moonbaby26]

Title: Sleepover

Pairing: Peter Maximoff x Reader

Summary: Continuation from previous chapter. After getting Peter back to his house in D.C., he asks you to spend the night. You want to, but you’re also worried about what his mother and his twin sister Wanda may really think of you. As you and Peter get a little more time alone, you also wonder how far you’re ready to go yourself.

Warnings: Nothing more than kissing really in this chapter. Bit of awkwardness from Reader though not knowing what they really want or how to go about it yet.

Chapters: Previous Chapter | Next Chapter

Taglist: @drikawinchester , @n0obmaster69 , @alexloveskili , @bluesprings18 , @weakmoony-stuff , @slytherinsi-mp , @wintwrsoldiwr , @tommy-braccoli , @amourtentiaa , @cringingmemeries , @bi-panicatthe-disco , @himbos-are-my-lifeblood , @simp4mcuwomen , @ikkleroniekins , @cowboyenorgy , @the-chaotic-cow

My Masterlist

——————————

“Anyway, can we argue inside at least? (Y/N) promised to call Xavier when we got here.” Peter piped up, trying to shuffle away from his mother at last.

At the sudden sound of your name though, you felt an added bit of nervousness. You also made eye contact with Peter’s mother for the very first time then, as if she’d only just realized you were there.

Peter’s sister Wanda was also looking back at you with question in her face as well at the reveal of your name. But you said nothing yet, just walking up to hand Peter his crutches.

You purposefully busied yourself turning right back around too, getting that jacket he’d stolen on the plane out from the back of the car as well for him. The sunglasses he already had still on top of his head.

So then, the only other things left in the car were the meager amount of clothes you’d bought for yourself. Which you didn’t need right now as you walked back to the others, carrying his jacket. But really pretty unsure yourself if you were even going to be invited inside for long at all.

“Come on, I’ll show you where the phone is,” Peter spoke again though, either oblivious to the increasing awkwardness for everyone else or just ignoring it entirely as he motioned for you to follow him back up the steps and through the still open front door.

—————————

As you were unfolding the little piece of paper with the motel address and phone number from out of your pocket, you tried to concentrate on the task at hand. The corded phone was propped against your shoulder to rest against your ear, you now standing there in the Maximoffs’ small kitchen. But even as you started to dial the numbers, half your attention was still on whatever Peter was now rapidly saying to his family.

“Yeah, (Y/N) goes to that school. You know I just went there to go ask about Dad since they know him. But then there’s this explosion, and I had to pull everybody out. And all the sudden this mutant god is apparently attacking the world and he took Xavier. But then the government shows up like dolts thinking Xavier’s doing it instead. And they take us to question us, but they’ve got some evil experiment shit going on in there too-”

He only took the smallest breath, continuing at that accelerated pace. “And they had that other guy, remember him, Mom? Logan? Anyway, so he breaks out and wrecks the place, so we get out and I get (Y/N), then we find out where Xavier is so we go to get him. We’re in Egypt and we all fight and that god dude breaks my leg. But he’s trying to make Dad help him, but Dad turns on him and-”

“Hello?” You heard someone on the other end of the line finally answer at the motel. You could still hear Peter rattling on excitedly behind you though, your name peppered into his story several more times as you just answered back on the phone.

“Hi, is there a Charles Xavier checked in there? I need to ring his room please.”

There was a long pause where you could only keep standing there, just looking at the kitchen wall and the bit of older panelling that covered it before the phone finally started ringing again.

Peter was now already talking about the aircraft carrier and your stay there by the time you heard the receiver pick up again.

“This is Charles.”

“Hi…hey, it’s me.” You answered with some relief.

You could hear the quick recognition in the Professor’s own voice as you didn’t have to say your name before he gladly responded. “Ah, good. You made it with no trouble then? We checked in here a while ago. I’m in room 104 if you’d need to call back. Are you leaving now to drive back?”

You tried to commit the room number to memory even as you were already replying. “Yeah, it wasn’t a bad drive. We just got here a minute ago. I-”

“Yo, Prof.!” Peter interjected, surprisingly at your side abruptly, also speaking into the phone then. “We’re barely in the door. I was going to show (Y/N) around a bit. That cool? Pretty jet lagged anyway. Probably be safer to crash on the couch tonight and have (Y/N) head your way in the morning, right?”

You blinked, for one thing not even having heard Peter stop talking to his family. But two, he was really saying you should sleep here? Not just joking around anymore? Could he even decide that on his own?

You felt frozen in that moment, not wanting to look back towards the kitchen at all and whatever surprised expressions his mother and sister may now also have on their faces.

The pause on the other end of the line was very noticeable as well before Xavier eventually continued. Peter shimmied even closer to you so he could also put his ear almost against the phone as you turned it slightly for him.

“Peter, I appreciate you looking out for everyone’s best interests and safety,” The Professor answered then, but with that tone which said he clearly doubted that was the speedster’s true or only reasoning. “But I would think that’d be more for your mother to-”

“Mom!” Peter turned his head back, rather loud in your ear as you flinched a little. “Can (Y/N) sleep on the couch? I mean you hate it when Wanda drives late by herself. Same thing right? It’s a long drive back to New York. What self respecting mom is just going to throw anybody’s kid out into the night like that, huh?”

You were tired, yes. It’d already been a very long day of traveling. But you weren’t that helpless. You were pretty sure you’d be fine. This was so weird though. Standing here in silence while someone else bargained for you. Was he really just trying to extend your time together however he could?

“I don’t care, Peter.” You just heard a rather exasperated answer though from Magda after another moment. “You’re going to do whatever you want anyway. Why even ask me anymore?”

The tension from their argument in the driveway clearly remained, or maybe this was how it always was between them? You couldn’t know yet, just caught in the middle it seemed as Peter only took that as good enough, talking back into the phone quickly, “Mom says it’s cool.”

You heard a sigh on the other end, and Xavier replied, “You’re old enough, I don’t have much say myself. But do call me again when you are leaving so we know when you’re back on the road, agreed?”

“Yes.” You said, pulling the phone more back to you then. “I’ll definitely let you know. Please tell the others I’m okay. I’ll see you all soon.”

After that, you and the Professor both told each other goodnight, and that was it. You hung the phone back up, but not yet sure what you’d really gotten yourself into as you glanced back at Peter. Peter who was now outright grinning from ear to ear.

“So…Chuck Norris or Bruce Lee? Movie night?” He asked you.

But what else could you do? You didn’t mind getting the chance at a little more time together of course. You just weren’t sure about how much anyone else actually wanted you here in this house tonight.

——————————

Not long after, whatever deeper discussions still loomed in the air about Peter’s choices of chasing his estranged father straight into a near death experience with a genocidal mutant god appeared shelved. At least for now anyway.

You’d seen Magda grab some sort of drink. Resigning herself to an armchair and the living room television as she seemed to ignore you all then, even as Peter remained almost bubbly while the two of you started down the basement stairs to his room.

You really hadn’t seen where Wanda had gone, but Peter just kept talking. So your focus only returned to him as you both cleared the last step at the bottom of the staircase. You behind him as you carried his crutches, then handing them back to him as you entered the room.

“And voila, man cave de Pietro!” He announced, waving an arm out towards the space.

You weren’t sure why you’d expected something smaller either. Of course most basements sprawled out to take up near the whole bottom footprint of a house. But this was still large to you, and clearly well used.

There were things everywhere. More than just a room obviously. No, this was his life, his hideaway. The more you looked, the more things you saw. Bicycles, guitars, comic books, band posters, all pieces of his hobbies and likes scattered about.

But there was furniture as well. A little table, some chairs, was this always where he ate too? There was a big sectional couch, the cushions indented a little like he may have a favorite spot there.

You didn’t miss the expensive looking television as well, and the VHS player. All the tapes, and the nintendo and the atari, the record player, a stereo, and boxes of games, cassettes, and music records.

And his bed was near in the center of it all, much wider than one person should need and almost right on the ground as he just fell back onto it sending a noticeable wave across the sheets. A waterbed clearly. But you just laughed a little, still a bit amazed. “You really do live here in the true sense of the word don’t you?”

“Hey, I make do. Home sweet home.” He smirked, but also raised an eyebrow at you not long after. “So you didn’t even notice the table back there did you?”

At his words you did look back over your shoulder with a little confusion. But you started to smile as soon as you realized what he was talking about. An air hockey table back around the corner. Some clutter on top of it like it hadn’t been used in a while, but it was clear he remembered your arcade favorites to point it out like he was.

“I figured I’d try to keep that a surprise until now…you know, since our arcade date might be a little postponed for the moment. So uh, surprise?” He said, laying back on his bed as he put his arms behind his head, still watching you.

“I did see the Ms. Pac-Man.” You replied, motioning to the more obvious machine right against the wall. No wonder he’d said he was pretty good at that one.

“Yeah, I used to have Pong too. Wore it out though. And got tired of trying to find parts to fix it.”

“Oh, I could see that happening.” Sure, he probably played everything with a little super speed. Though imagining him somehow ‘shoplifting’ a whole arcade machine whenever he needed another one was a bit interesting. How did that even work?

“So, uh…you want me to put a movie on for real? I was trying to get us out of that kitchen before Mom went off again. But we can do whatever. You know…whatever you want?” He spoke, albeit maybe a little oddly as you glanced to him again.

He almost sounded a touch nervous with those last words? The slight change in tone was enough for you to catch anyway as you did walk over to the bed regardless before sitting down on the edge of it beside him.

But it was strange here, the more you considered everything. It was hard to explain really. Because how many countless times had you sat in your friends’ rooms at the mansion? Guys or girls, just talking or playing games or whatever. Just hanging out as you supposed most all people your age did. But there was never anything weird, never anything uncomfortable.

It could even be late at night sometimes, some of you only half dressed in your sleep shirts or pajamas and no one thought anything about it. Because you just knew back then that no one thought of you as anything but a friend too.

But with Peter…being here now, you were suddenly acutely aware that you were sitting on his bed. In his room, as he seemed to be waiting for some sort of guidance from you as well. Was that why he sounded nervous?

Yet had Crystal ever been here too you wondered. Sitting just where you were sitting now? And why would you think of such a stupid thing in this very moment?

“Hey.” Peter said gently, causing you to look down as you felt his fingers graze your wrist after he moved his arm to reach out.

You smiled a little at the contact, but still felt kind of foolish. There was no point in trying to play it cool though as you confessed the current reason for your own awkwardness at least. “I guess I just didn’t expect to be in anybody’s room like this. It’s not bad, it’s just…”

“Different?” He asked, helping you out a little to your surprise.

“Yeah.” You answered simply. But you could see as another emotion seemed to pass briefly through his expression, furthering your bit of confusion.

Was that guilt on his face?

And he spoke a little abruptly, with that rarer more serious tone emerging even though the words came fairly quick. “You know I was still just giving you a hard time right? I’m cool going as slow as we need. Despite being the fastest dude alive and all, I don’t have to be the fastest guy in bed. That’d royally suck actually. For both of us. So don’t feel like there are some sort of rules here. Like, you do not have to do anything you don’t want to do.”

You blinked, those words not what you were expecting. But it wasn’t bad at all the more you got to consider them. Was he really so worried that you may think he was trying to get something from you here that you weren’t yet ready to give?

Honestly, you didn’t even know yourself what you were ready for though. “Really, it’s okay.” You replied truthfully. “I’m not uncomfortable. I think I’m still in disbelief is all. I never would have thought this is how my summer would start this year. Never in a million years.”

He sat up, smiling again then with his normal tone bouncing back fairly easily. “And I am totally coming over for a pool party, as soon as this damned cast is off. I mean I’m white as shit so people may have to avert their eyes. But we would totally wreck the others in some volleyball or something. I know we would. As long as Jean doesn’t cheat with the telekinesis crap. I could do some whirlpools too you know, knock ‘em off their feet.”

“Sounds safe.” You said, laughing at the image. Maybe living in some random motel for the foreseeable future wouldn’t be so bad after all?

He chuckled in return, but was cut off by another voice just before he started to speak again.

“Knock knock.”

You both looked up toward the stairs as you first saw a pair of black boots coming down them. Black boots, old jeans, and a dark red t-shirt.

Peter called back, straightening up a little more at the sight. “Hey, sis. Fun run out upstairs with Mom and Dynasty on the tube or what?”

“Well, it was an Alexis and Dominique Deveraux battle episode, actually.” Wanda answered a little regretfully.

“Aw, your favorite catfight duo! Why the exit then?” Peter questioned in return.

She gave Peter a slight accusatory look. “Well, you got Mom in a mood and she wanted to talk about my school next. She wanted to and I didn’t. Simple as that.”

“Well…actually I thought you’d still be at your dorm too really. Not that I’m complaining. Haven’t seen you in forever. Your classes get cancelled?” He asked.

“Well, when the metal roof got pulled off the main assembly hall, I think they decided to err on the side of caution.” She responded, rather deadpan.

“Understandable. You think you’ll still go back in the fall?” Peter questioned anyway.

“Don’t know. I haven’t really liked anything about that college yet. But I said I didn’t want to talk about it remember?” Her tone wasn’t cold to him, but still rather final.

He clearly wasn’t as intimidated by her as you were though as he didn’t miss a beat. “Well how about a movie with us? Me and (Y/N) were about to pick something.”

How true that statement was on Peter’s part, you weren’t really sure. But you still said nothing as Wanda just moved to sit on the other edge of the bed, almost as far from you as could be you noted. But Peter still between the both of you as she looked unimpressed. “Can it be something a little less bloody than your usual at least?”

He scoffed, teasing back. “Well I don’t keep your Bewitched and I Dream of Jeannie box sets down here you know.”

“Oh shut up.” Wanda retorted, but it was the first time you’d seen her really smirk. Though the siblings were clearly very different, that expression was also a brief resemblance you couldn’t miss.

“Wanda’s a bit of a sitcom connoisseur.” Peter commented for your benefit.

You took the chance to make eye contact with her at that, thinking that might be your in to finally start a real conversation. But she only looked away. If Wanda was unfriendly with strangers period, or actually just disliked you specifically, it was hard to know yet.

“Just pick something.” She finally replied to Peter though. “If I go back through the living room to try to go to my room right now, Mom’s just going to try and start an interrogation again.”

—————————

Hours later

“Hey, you keep moving around. Do you want a pillow?” Peter’s voice drifted from above.

You were pretty disoriented, for one strange moment just staring up at him and clueless to where you even were before your senses returned a little.

The sunlight was gone then. The only real light flickering from the television nearby that was now on some movie you didn’t remember the name of as you sat back up a little on his bed. Was this the third movie he’d put in? You hadn’t lasted very long at all had you?

“I can get on the couch,” You offered, awake enough then to at least remember his mother and sister were still around here somewhere. Though, when had Wanda left? You didn’t see her anymore and you didn’t even know what time it was.

“Seems kind of unnecessary,” Peter replied, in a quieter tone that caught your attention as you paused.

Was he inferring that you should just get under the blankets right here? With him? But sharing the bunk on the aircraft carrier wasn’t the same as being in his literal bed. Here in his family’s home where they already seemed to be rather distant with you at best.

They didn’t know you here. You had to remind yourself of that. They couldn’t know you didn’t spend the night at boys’ houses as habit. You didn’t get in their beds with them upon just meeting. Honestly, you couldn’t even remember the last time you’d slept somewhere besides the now destroyed mansion.

“Peter…” You didn’t know how to convey that concern really. You did want Magda and Wanda to like you eventually if you were being honest. You wanted them to understand. But you wanted Peter to understand too. Even though he’d said he was fine taking things as slow as you wanted, you felt it would still be all too easy to make him feel rejected without meaning to if you weren’t careful.

“I mean, we could both fit on my couch down here too,” He added, so close then that you were sure he was waiting for you to cross the rest of the small distance and kiss him.

And how could staring at each other in the dark, with the muffled sounds of some badly dubbed kung fu movie in the background now be bordering on romantic for you? Somewhere in the back of your mind you did think of all those stereotypical movie scenes all of the sudden. Two young people just in their own world, oblivious to all else.

“I don’t know if I’ve made the best impression on your family yet.” You tried to explain. “If I’m still in this bed with you the next time one of them comes down here…there is no way they’re going to believe we only watched movies and slept tonight.”

He tilted his head a little, yet already smiling. “And you assume they think someone like you would be that physically attracted to someone that looks and acts like me?”

“I do…and I am.” You answered though. Not trying to lead him on, but unable to help yourself either then as you did close that small distance to kiss him. You still disliked anytime he made those comments about somehow being underserving. He was far from it.

The little bit of tension you felt in return told you he was surprised too, but that quickly faded of course as he only pressed into it to kiss you back.

You had no intention of going too far or taking advantage of his family’s allowing you to stay here tonight however. It wouldn’t be right.

But you were still young as well, and it’d be a lie to say it didn’t feel good as he touched your face and your own hand moved onto his chest. It was something too how quickly the heat rose inside you. You could feel the outline of his body through his shirt as your hand trailed down.

He was warm, his abdomen firm against your moving hand. You kissed him harder actually as his own hand moved back behind your neck. But you needed to stop soon, either that or he needed to wear thicker clothing as your hand wandered further.

It was him that surprised you to finally pull back first though. Yet smiling at you again as he kept his face close.

Your breathing had already changed a little as you looked back to him before he glanced down. He raised an eyebrow at your hand now resting on the waistband of his shorts.

Realizing what he was looking at, you pulled your hand away, apologizing reflexively. “Sorry, I wasn’t trying to…” Your mind fumbled a little. Your hand had just been running down. There was no real intent behind it, despite how it looked.

“You’re so funny. Seriously.” He said in that slight tone of amusement though. “Jumping out a plane one day, ready to sacrifice yourself samurai warrior style for your buddies, brave as shit.” He tilted his head, before then enclosing his hand around yours that you’d just pulled back. “But here you get flustered? I’m just a guy, (Y/N). Total nobody. There’s nothing to apologize for. Though I still don’t get it at all. I mean, why you like me like you do.”

“But you admit it then at least?” You tried to counter back, instead of arguing against his very real point that a new relationship could be more intimidating to you than a battlefield. “You admit that I like you. Instead of just telling me I’m making a mistake?”

“Yeah, I mean I guess even I can’t really make up a story of why you’d choose to drive all the way back to New York by yourself instead of bringing one of your friends here with you…unless you really wanted to be one on one with me.” But he just smirked once more, leaning in again to steal a quick additional kiss before pulling back away. “Guess you’re just that nuts.”

“Thanks.” You joked back.

“Takes one to know one.” He answered tauntingly, then sliding off the bed a little awkwardly as he put his feet back on the floor, albeit trying to only put weight on his good leg.

He didn’t have to go far though to reach a nearby closet, pulling a large blanket from it. He wadded it up a little, then tossing it to you. “Since you’re being modest though, you can sleep with Optimus Prime and Megatron tonight. But here, take one of my pillows too.”

In the dark, you couldn’t really make out what was on the blanket. Some sort of characters. You’d just have to take his word on it being Transformers before you caught the pillow that he threw to you next.

“As far as which couch you sleep on, your call. But Wanda always gets up, classic insomniac. I don’t think you want to tempt her with the opportunity to peek into your head if you stay in the living room. She hasn’t met you for real yet and probably still wants the background deets on you.”

“She’s another psychic?” At first you couldn’t remember if he’d already told you that or not. But no, you definitely would have recalled that. Yet maybe this was better? You wouldn’t have to prove anything if she could just see the truth in your mind of how you felt for her brother.

But Peter waved his hand in a ‘so-so’ type gesture. “I don’t think labels really work well with my sister. Yeah, she can get in people’s heads. But she’s not like your friends. She’s her own deal. It’s different. There’s a lot more that she can do. I’m just saying I wouldn’t advise messing with her is all.”

Whatever concerned look you must have given then was enough for him to quickly continue though, “But I’ll work on her the whole time while you’re back in New York. She just doesn’t know you yet. It’ll be fine!”

“Uh huh.” You said, not so confidently. “Guess I’m sleeping on this couch then.”

“A wise choice I think.”

“Of course, you could just be saying all this to get me scared enough to stay down here.”

“Oh, it’s both of course.” He smiled, watching you lay down on the couch even as he got into his bed. “And if you get cold, babe. I’m just a few feet away you know.”

Even from here, you were pretty sure he winked at you as you wrapped yourself up in that blanket he’d given you and stretched out on his couch. “If I go over there, I’m not coming back over here and I know it.”

“Or I could come over there,” he offered, only half jokingly of course.

But you just laid your head on the pillow, knowing you were trying to do the right thing at least. “Not enough room for your leg. You’d be uncomfortable.”

“If you say so, killjoy.”

You only smiled. “Goodnight, Peter.”

“Night, Glo-Worm.” He responded happily.

“Ugh,” You’d hoped he’d forgotten that by now, but apparently not. “Really have to fix that. There’s got to be a better codename for me.”

“Well we can’t all be Quicksilver. Sorry, I called dibs.”

“And we can’t all choose our nicknames out of a department store display case either.” You retorted.

“Ouch. Touché.”

He didn’t tease you anymore after that, but you could still feel his gaze on you as you closed your eyes again not long after. He was close enough that you also felt safe, even here in this new environment.

It was going to be hard to leave tomorrow, that much was certain. But at least you’d also know what you’d have to look forward to as soon as his cast was off again.

Maybe the next time you two fell asleep under the same roof, it’d be in a more neutral territory where you wouldn’t have to worry about his mother or sister’s judgement. Then you could hold him just like you wanted to. And it would be well worth the wait.

——————————

(Continued in next chapter here)

[createandconstruct]

can i ask about amarant coral? the monk in red himself~

Can you ask about Amarant Coral? *cracks fingers* Oh I insist that you do. Welcome to my Amarant Appreciation Post:

favorite thing about them: First off best thing about Amarant? His theme. The percussion and the guitar. It’s great and it captures him so well. People out here like “take Amarant out of the game he adds nothing.” EXCUSE ME? You remove the Amarant you remove the Amarant Theme my friend and that is something I do NOT vibe with. 

least favorite thing about them: I wanna know more about him. Now Amarant doesn’t need a backstory or history in the game. In a sense, he already has one that connects him to Zidane and explains his motives and actions and eventual arc. But my issue is, Square never gave him anything else. If you look at Ultimania there’s additional lore about other characters, like Steiner for instance. You learn Steiner was a war orphan who was saved by the Pluto Knights - explaining his devotion to them. Amarant though? Square was like “uh... yeah he was born....? And then he uh got famous...? Idk then he met Zidane. You figure it out.” Square. I hate you. 18 years from his birth until he became “well known”. WHAT WAS HE DOING. WHY’D HE BECOME A SECURITY GUARD. WHAT WAS ON HIS RESUME. TELL MEEEE. Like, okay, what the actual in-game canon gives us on Amarant is sort of enough. He’s a purposely written mysterious “cool-guy” character so we’re given scraps to make him unknown but come on. In the published after-game canon, like Ultimania, we could have been given a bit more. He says he doesn’t remember anything about his origins or parents, but why. Was he another victim of Gaia’s wars? Probably. Was he born on a battlefield? Fighting for his life, living without comrades, taking scraps whenever he could? Was he betrayed when he was young? Is he a supposed to be a version of Zidane had he not been adopted into Tantalus by Baku??? These are questions I deserve answers to, Square.

favorite line: “’I can't just walk away. It goes against my nature...’ You're a real simpleton. Forget it, guys. There's no stopping this fool." I love this. Amarant figures Zidane out pretty quickly after Ipsen’s Castle. Zidane is hardheaded and also an actor. He acts cool and pretends his reasons for doing things are loose but when he’s decided something it’s always for a reason. You don’t need a reason to help people, but Zidane has his reasons for helping Kuja and while Amarant doesn’t give two shits what they are he knows Zidane won’t be stopped because, despite everything, Zidane saved a loser like him. Also this line “Tell me! Why didn't you kill me!?" Because I quote it all the time and it makes myself laugh. Amarant is such a drama queen and Zidane knows it. Zidane’s like “dude... what is your damage, it’s 5 pm on Tuesday in Madain Sari. I ain’t getting blood on my gloves cause you’re having a temper tantrum.” And then Amarant runs away to have an existential crisis. He’s 26 but compared to Zidane, he’s the real teenager with angst.  

brOTP: I could talk about Zidane or Freya with Amarant but instead I’m gonna say the underrated dynamic of Amarant and Eiko (and also Vivi).  Amarant with the kids is truly the greatest gift given by his presence in the game. Amarant has never known true suffering until he became a designated legal guardian of a group of minors. It also kills me how he’s the one to volunteer to carry Eiko and Vivi up the Iifa tree. He looks at Zidane and is like “you have seriously been the ‘adult’ of this group???”

OTP: Gotta say the Freya and Amarant dynamic. I really enjoyed their unlikely friendship in the game but then the content. The fan content. The Freya x Amarant fans out there, you win. Ya got me. You captured me and I am now imprisoned by their banter and begruntled allies to lovers story. Even if they’re not romantic I love them together and really wish the game gave us more of them. But even Lani and Amarant together are valid, though I prefer them as butting head bros. Not much content for my girl Lani out there either, she deserves more.

nOTP: Nothing I can think of. I tend to like platonic pairings for Amarant. The dude needs friends because he can barely define the word friendship.

random headcanon: Before Zidane returns at the end of the game Amarant wanders around a bit, unsure of what to do. He doesn’t feel any place with the others in Alexandria, Burmecia, or Lindblum. I imagine he goes off on his own for a bit like before but this time he’s not after Zidane or a fight. Instead he’s got no particular destination. Yet he somehow always finds himself running into people just like him - or the old him - friendless lonely people who are looking for a fight. He doesn’t go out his way to find these folks he simply runs into them and decides he might as well knock some sense into them. He does however make it his business to go after any murmur of people hatching any ideas of going after the far off little village on the Lost Continent. The home of the genomes and black mages. They were so helpless, so weak that anyone who’d want to mess with them is pathetic in Amarant’s book. Until Zidane returns, no one has the chance to even look at the Black Mage Village the wrong way because in the shadows Amarant lurks, making damn well sure of that.

unpopular opinion: I kinda love that he’s just there for most of the game? While I agree he gets the short end of the stick in the same way as Freya, not receiving additional individual character spotlight (which could have very well been supplied through discoverable lore in the world/npcs or through sidequests) I never considered his “standing off to the side” as a detriment to his character. 

Many would probably agree that Amarant always felt like a bit of a parody of the loner character, or at least the stereotype of the loner character. Amarant is so easily paralleled with Squall and Cloud’s surface-level attitudes because his dialogue always felt like something to poke fun at. As the player we’re supposed to align with Zidane’s way of thinking and how he views Amarant. When Amarant loses to Zidane and pretty much grits his teeth and goes “KILL ME,” along with Zidane we’re supposed to kinda raise our brow at him and go “...really, dude?”

 Amarant’s a character introduced as an antagonist who has more in common with the power hungry villains of the game. Like many of the characters in FFIX, Amarant is in search of purpose in life, which he has never found, because he was always looking in the wrong places - in places of violence and power. Very toxic-masculinity of him. Amarant is “cool” on an aesthetic level but in reality he’s the polar opposite of cool in terms of what FFIX states about the need for others to be intertwined in your experiences so that you can live a full life. 

I sort of love that he’s like a grumpy pitball following a 16 year old and his friends around. Then he sits in the corner when they all meet up and discuss current events acting like he doesn’t care (not to mention he casually walks as everyone is running as fast as they can to escape Terra - made me laugh cry on my first playthrough) He is “just there” but that’s because he has no where else to be, no where else to go, he’s a man without a home. And until Zidane offers his hand, at the point where Amarant is most willing to take it at Ipsen’s Castle, he’s not truly a party member. He IS an outsider for almost the entire game but at Ipsen Castle he joins the party, becomes a comrade, and decides he’ll allow himself to change paths and start a life where he has friends and lives, as well as fights for them. Which is why after that moment, Amarant finally has a victory pose.

song i associate with them: I was scratching my head for so long trying to think of a song or track that had Amarant vibes until it hit me. Outskirt Stand by Tsukasa Tawada (from Pokemon Colosseum). Amarant is so chill, he’s not a bombastic guy, so he needs a theme that drops me in the rocky open desert of the Lost Continent like I’m just lumbering around looking for a monkey-tailed menace. Some other Amarant tunes:  Pyrite Town, The Under, Snagem Hideout tracks from Pokemon Colosseum. This post is just an elaborate call to action for everyone to listen to the Pokemon Colosseum soundtrack. Tsukasa Tawada is so great and he has a YouTube. Check him out.

favorite picture of them:

Yoshitaka Amano’s Salamander Coral. I love him. He had too much power. 

Also everything drawn by @crispy-ghee. Everything. I will think of this Comic forever until I die. Tattoo it on my flesh. The banter, the dynamics, the post-game content, the Zidane prince-consort outfit, the new Amarant outfit, the stuck-in-the-same-place relationship him and Freya have. Perfect. Go read it and consume Crisipy’s stuff. And also check them and their current art out, they just consistently get better and better. Here’s a first panel preview of my fav comic. Read it.

 @hannahlady​‘s Amarant art and their Freya/Amarant art is just ugh. *Chef’s Kiss* Here is another preview because you should go look at it.

Here’s a piece that deserves so much more love by @snackage. I LOVE how they drew Amarant. Here’s a little preview. It’s SO GOOD

Anyway TL;DR: Amarant is love and life and you’ll have to pull him from my little gremlin hands.