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#i want to be able to SMELL THINGS outside!!!!!!!
world0fmadness · 2 days
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DEAD MOUSE… LITERALLY
pelle “ dead ” ohlin x taxidermist! reader
♡ headcanons for gifting pelle a taxidermy mouse!
୨୧ i actually have another request for pelle dating headcanons of him with a taxidermist partner so this is just a little thing about gifting him a mouse until i get that one done too hehe <3
♡ requested by anon | related hc available here and here | view my metal masterlist here
reading music recommendations: five four child voice by fridge - flesh burnt black by panzerwar
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♡ when you first started getting into taxidermy whilst in a relationship with pelle, he was very very very supportive!
୨୧ in his own way, of course! but he was as supportive as he could be, always letting you read your study books in peace and even cleaning your shared room up a bit to give you more space for your equipment and supplies
♡ sometimes he’d even bring you home roadkill or any dead animals he saw whilst on his walks or collecting mail for the band! obviously he wouldn’t bring you any dead animals that were too raggedy or really messed up, he understands the body has to be at least a little good quality for you to really do much with it…
୨୧ obviously, with you being so new to the hobby and not having much experience, your first few attempts were certainly not the best and a lot of the time you ended up having to trash them, almost to the dismay of pelle who doesn’t care all that much about having dead animals in your shared bedroom
♡ that’s another good thing about dating pelle as a taxidermist, he is not bothered one bit by you having dead animals in your shared bedroom, never bothered by the smell nor the blood
୨୧ if anything, he would be slightly more put off by the smell of the chemicals you have to use, he doesn’t like how the strong scent burns his nose and sometimes gives him a headache but he won’t ever tell you that! but you will know, he isn’t that great at hiding his discomfort when it comes to things like that so you’ll move to using the chemicals and such outside, away from the enclosed space of your shared bedroom, but pelle will watch from the window or doorway, still sometimes wanting to watch the fascinating process
♡ the day you finally manage to perform a successful taxidermy attempt, it’s actually on an animal that pelle had found and given to you!
୨୧ it was a simple field mouse, pelle had found it under the shared band house in nearly pristine condition, obviously having died not too long before he found it and picked it up, pocketing it before bringing it to you
♡ pelle was just slightly shy as he handed the small body over to you, approaching you from behind and waiting for you to notice his presence before ducking his head down and pulling the mouse out of his pocket, outstretching his hand out to you and offering the mouse up to you, mumbling quietly about how he thought it could be of some use to you, a dusty pink blush overtaking his pale face as you thank him, gently taking the mouse from his open palm and leaning up to plant a sweet kiss on his hot cheek before he wanders off again, leaving you to begin your process
“ here… found it under the house, must’ve died in the early morning… might be able to do something with it ” ( when he walks away from you, his cold hand will come up to pet at his heated cheek, his slim fingers ghosting over your kissing spot as a tiny smile comes across his face )
୨୧ as the process was coming along and you knew this would finally be your first majorly successful attempt at taxidermy, excitement was overtaking you as well as… appreciation and thankfulness, for pelle… for how genuinely interested he is in your hobby and you knew exactly what you had to do with the mouse…
♡ pelle had been away from you for most of the day, leaving you alone to allow you to focus the best you can, staying pent up in your shared bedroom writing lyrics and doodling in his sketchbook, drawing things to show you when you finish up and join him! he knows more than anyone that sometimes, in order to fully focus, you need to be left alone and he respects that
୨୧ with him being away from you, it gave you the time to prepare exactly what you wanted to do, going above and beyond for the gift that you were going to give him
♡ when you’re finally done, it’s nearly midnight and pelle has wandered down to the back door, calling your name quietly as to get your attention which causes you to quickly turn your body towards him, making sure your body covers the finished gift that sits atop the garden table, only causing curiosity to peak inside the mind of pelle as he takes slow steps towards you with a curios gaze, observing your nervous smile and watching how you bounce on your feet whilst he tries to peek over your shoulder which doesn’t prove useful as whatever you’re hiding is small
୨୧ by the time pelle has stopped in front of you, tilting his head slightly as to probe an explanation from you, you’ve already began rambling to him about how you made him something special, how you wanted to repay him for all of his help in your newfound hobby and how it might not look the best but you hope he likes it at least a little…
♡ pelle nods slightly as you turn back around and pick something up, hiding it in your hands as you hold your hands out in front of him before opening them, revealing just what it is you were so excited yet nervous to gift him
୨୧ the second he sees what it is, his eyes widen slightly and his pale face is overtaken by a deep red blush, a rare smile stretching across his chapped lips as his usually dull eyes light up as they always do around you
♡ it’s the small field mouse he gave to you so much earlier in the day… only, it’s no longer curled up and cold, no, now it’s standing on it’s hind feet, holding a… tiny mock microphone in one of its little paws and the body is covered by denim and mock leather, tiny pieces of cotton sewn onto the denim as mock band patches, the face covered in white powder with black around the eyes… it doesn’t take long for pelle to realise that the taxidermy mouse is supposed to be him but you burst into an explanation before he can say or do anything
୨୧ in the midst of your explanation, word vomiting about how you just wanted to honour him, about how you thought he would like it and how you know it may not look the best but… he shuts you up before you can go on any longer, leaning down to press his dry lips against yours in a strong kiss and bringing his hands up to gently hold your wrists, making sure you can’t attempt to hide the gift in embarrassment or shame
♡ when he finally pulls away from the kiss and looks down at the mouse, his face is once again overcome by that rare, full teeth smile as he looks down at it, bringing his hands down to take it from you, handling it as though it’s the most valuable treasure in the world, fiddling with the mini denim jeans and microphone with a glittering look in his blue eyes
“ it’s amazing… you did amazing, you know? so talented… thank you, for making it for me… ” ( he may not be the best with words be he is truly trying his absolute best to tell you how appreciative he is of it, how happy this gift has just made him, and it works, you can tell just by the tone in his voice how truly happy he is in this moment )
୨୧ pelle puts it up on his desk that night, making sure to lean it against his pen holder so that it stays upright, both of you chuckling quietly at how slightly terrifying it looks, your eyes admiring pelle as his eyes crinkle as he laughs, his face lit up with actual happiness, a rare sight that you eagerly drink in
♡ but pelle could not care less about how it may not be the best, about how it might look like a small prop from some horror film… it’s perfect to him… possibly the most perfect gift anyone has ever given to him and he makes sure you know it in the following days! he never quite gets over the little mouse version of himself, always finding himself looking at it when he feels down or upset, it reminds him that someone cares, you care… he treasures that strange little mouse more than any other item he owns
୨୧ the mouse version of him would probably lead to him doodling similar things, himself but in mouse form, or other animal forms!
♡ he really enjoys showing you these drawings, showing you how your creation inspired him to create too, even drawing you as your favourite animal and gifting the drawing to you as you gifted him his mouse mini <3
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orcelito · 2 years
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Daydreaming about being able to wear shorts again. I'll put up with the deathray that is the sun just pls stop making the wind so painful
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Very generic “”gothy” character in a children’s cartoon” type look just out of curiosity, seeing if I had enough stuff to put together a full outfit from a box of old clothes lol. I didn’t have an actual main shirt though, so it’s just a plain tank top with cat shape cut out of paper and safety pinned onto the front 
#Though not calling anyone generic if this is your style or something. I don't mean it in a bad way. I just mean like.. all of the steretypic#al elements are there. The choker thing. the 'fishnet shirt under a tank top' . the 'carefully placed slightly askew studded belt' etc.#the skirt + some form of patterned specially striped tights + platform boots combo. etc. Like from a character design standpoint#These are the elements usually present in a show when they want to portray 'this caracter is slightly edgy and alternative'#just missing like.. hair with straight across bangs in pigtails that's black with a few colored streaks in it. OR just like shoulder length#shaggy hair that's also streaky and has a sidebang. and like.. one lip piercing or something ghhjbjh.. dark eyeliner#black nailpolish. I'm not painting my nails just for one uoutfit though. I actually used to wear nailpolish more but I just hate the smell#so much now. I can't see how I ever was able to bear it. I think maybe because usually I had some bigger spaces with ventalation. I guess#I could paint them outside maybe. Still#It's still hard to beleive some poeple will like. full on#get their nails done on a constant basis. get hair done. etc.etc. Not even just becuase of the money but like. the sensory experience seems#ovwerhelming. I only have been to a hair salon like twice in my life and both times I HATED  a person touching me. and having to like lay my#head back and get it rinsed. etc. I went to a nail slon literally once because someone else wanted to go and I happened to be with them#and the smell was bad to me and also I did not like them touching me even if it was just my hands. Also I've never had fake nails#and didn't want them so when I went in I just got them plainly painted a plain color with nothing special andit's just like.. I could have#done that myself for free lol.. I get going to a place with special tools and equipment if you want something complicated but like..#why pay to have your plain nails plainly painted in a plain way#Hair thing if more bothersome though like. Maybe strangers can touch my hands i guess but like. letting someone near my head and face.#automatic bad reflex. Like an animal protecting it's belly or something. I think amplified by the fact that not only is a stranger touching#you but also there's like. so much. stuff. wet feeling on hair and then the feeling of hands and then so many smells and then other poeple#being there too. etc. etc. Though since my hair is so long now I have been curious every once in a while to like.. go into a place and get#an estimate. Not to go through with it actually but just like. hey if I theoretically wanted  you to bleach my very dark extremely thick hai#r that is all the way to my fingertips. and make it like white.how much would that cost and how long would it take. I feel like it would tak#e froever and be very expensive since it'd probably use up a lot of product. I barely even keep up with coloring my own hair at home anymore#because it's always such a process. Instead of one thing of dye I need literally like 4 lol. etc.#Or maybe it'd be cheaper because they'd have bulk items instead of buying single package. But still. the man hours probably. cost of labor.#ANYWAY khjk... Another fun look just to be silly. Not really my style but it's all just playing dress up
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despite-everything · 1 year
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i think i've gone nose-blind to my incense
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alluralater · 1 year
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🥾 Ahh so adding to that weight on your shoulders and showing your incredible strength. Sounds like not only do you love them and are proud of them but you're proud of what you've been able to help them to achieve. Your reflection is partly showing the success of others you've supported, coming from that role as a parent as a youngster. - that's beautiful.
Currently - only myself and my own depression. I'm doing my masters next year but focusing on the now is super hard. I prioritise my work over me and then have nothing left. It's just me that's in the way.
Okay new Q : if you could have dinner with any famous person who would it be?
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in-class-daydreams · 8 days
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Imagine ex-husband Gojo doing things for his new love interests that you begged him for while you were married.
After a joint meeting between the sister schools, you overheard Suguru asking him who he was texting during the meeting.
Satoru replied, "Just letting my date know I'll be a bit late tonight since we ran long here. Todo can yap, huh?"
"Seriously!" Their voices faded as they walked down the hall.
You stood just outside the meeting room watching the corner the disappeared around. If you had to pinpoint the number one reason your marriage failed - more than clan pressure, more than the strain of being young parents, more than back to back to back missions - it would be the fact that Satoru can't communicate for shit.
Part of it wasn't his fault. His brain just didn't work like that. An inconvenient side effect of limitless is that everything makes sense in your head, but it's hard for a person with the gift to explain their thoughts to others.
So the no-call, no-shows to dinners was technically a side effect of limitless, as was his inability to articulate his feelings like an adult or the fact that he would just do things without even telling you there was a problem in the first place.
"Quit doing that with your face, brat." Sukuna emerges from the meeting room. He's out of his Ryomen form at the moment, as he usually is during meetings so that he can actually fit in his chair. "How long are you gonna let what he does affect you?"
"It doesn't!" you insist.
Sukuna rolls his eyes. "If that helps you sleep at night."
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Imagine reminding yourself that you can't be mad at him.
You're seeing other people now, too. Hell, you've been divorced for over a decade, it's insanity that you care at all.
It's just. You never doubted his love for you. Not for a second, not even now that your marriage failed and you largely raised your son on your own.
"Mom?"
Maybe your divorce was his motivation to be better. You're not sure. But if he's capable of change, capable of being attentive and communicative, why couldn't he change for you all those years ago?
"Mom."
Could it be that you were his childhood companion and he loved you, but he was never in love with you? Was his love for you less than your love for him?
You hardly notice your son calling out to you until he springs into action. "Mom!" Sen nudges you away from the stove to turn of the burner. When did smoke fill the kitchen? The roux you were trying to make was burnt to a crisp, stuck to the pan and emanating an unpleasant smell.
Sen gently pries your hands off the handle and drops the ruined pan in the sink to soak. Then he makes sure the burner's off before turning to you with a conflicted expression.
He may have inherited a hybrid of both your and Satoru's personal brands of emotional stuntedness, but he could put two and two together between how distracted you've been and the rumors of Satoru dating again - What with it being huge news among jujutsu society (aka power hungry clans with eligible daughters.) Your son had his own complicated feelings regarding his father and as much as he'd prefer Satoru stay away from you, it hurt him to see you like this.
Though, watching you try to keep a stiff upper lip for his sake during the divorce is the reason he doesn't want his father anywhere near you.
"I'm sorry, sweetheart." You wipe your hands on a dish towel. "I wasn't paying attention. Hang tight while I make you something else."
He could kill Satoru right now. But you wouldn't like that, so he won't.
"Mama, I--" He shuts his mouth. You've been protecting him from the details of the divorce his whole life. What did he know about comforting you? But while he may not have been able to protect you then, he can sure as hell try now.
"Mama, why don't I take you out to dinner? My treat."
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Imagine that Sen decides he needs to stop having ideas.
He brought you to a local okonomiyaki that you've been going to since he was little to the point where the owners knew you well and liked to give you little extras from the kitchen. Today's treat was a side of pickled radish.
It was your happy little hideaway. Away from jujutsu and clans and curses and your broken home.
Sen insisted on cooking the okonomiyaki for you, saying that, "My treats means I'll take care of everything!" The weak smile you gave him made his heart soar.
You giggle while he jokes around and tells you about school like how Hikari fell asleep for 45 minutes out of an hour long test and still got a better score than him. Hearing about your son and his happy school days always made you feel better.
Sen was ready to give himself a pat on the back for cheering you up when he hears the front bell jungle and a woman's laughter carries over.
"Fancy places are like that, though!" the woman laughs. "They give a bite of food per plate."
Then a familiar voice replies, "Yeah, but it was good, wasn't it? And now we get to fill up at a cute place like this."
Even though he's the one facing the door and not you, the look on your face tells Sen all he needs to know. What breaks his heart is that you've sunk lower into your seat to make yourself smaller.
Sen could kill his father right now.
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Hooray, angst!
Click [here] to keep up with ex-husband Gojo and his estranged family | Ask stuff about Sen and the fam [here]
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alicentofhightower · 2 months
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the cost of a dragon
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pairing: addam velaryon x wife!reader
synopsis: addam is covered in cuts and scrapes from falling and running in the forest, and now you must take care of him.
includes: fluff, episode 6 heavy spoilers, probably historically inaccurate w some parts but we’re just gonna Let That Slide, not proofread again oops
wc: 1.3k
a/n: i love him so bad. rn my top 3 tb characters are rhaenyra rhaena and addam. he’s so sweet!! i really hope we get to see a lot more of him in the next few episodes
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Addam is bewildered when he returns to your home, panting, eyes wide and mouth agape. You’ve never seen him like this, but you guess that it’s the dragon laying beside your house that’s done it.
“What’s happened?” You exclaim when you see the way he’s stumbled in, bleeding from a cut on his cheek.
“…The, the dragon,” He mumbles, locked hair spilling over his shoulders. Addam walks over to where you stand by the kitchen table, hands gently grasping your forearms, as yours do his, thumbs running over your skin to ground himself. He smells strange, like something otherworldly. Could it have been because of the beast outside your door?
“It came to me, followed me through the woods by the shore. I think I’ve claimed him. Yes, that’s what I’ve done. I must go.” Addam attempts to retract himself from your grip, but to no avail.
The pots and pans inside rattle when the silver creature lay its head on the yard outside, no doubt resting from its flight. “Please, my love,” Addam insists. “I need to go and see the queen myself. She is in need of more dragons herself, is she not? If I serve her, perhaps she will allow you and I to live at Dragonstone with her. This is our chance.”
You shake your head, apron ruffling from the beach’s wind blowing through the window. Addam has always been ambitious, has always wanted the best for you and himself. He’s fiercely loyal to you, a quality that made you want to marry him in the first place.
“Addam.” Your hands fly up to cup his cheeks, stopping him from continuing on with his tangent. “You’re covered in gashes and dirt and sand. At least let me lend you a hand.”
He softens at that, jaw seeming to unclench. Addam’s brown eyes have always been expressive, and now they seem to look at you as if you’re the sweetest person he’s ever known. “…I suppose you’re right,” He mutters, “but we must make haste.”
Finally, you let go of each other. You use one of your hands to intertwine your fingers with his, and the other to grip your skirts as you lead him to your room. It’s small and modest, mostly swallowed up by the bed you share. “Sit,” You say, almost commandingly, quickly fetching a spare piece of cloth by the tub in the main room and a bowl of water.
Addam’s eyes almost glint at the way you flounce about before him. He spreads his legs so you are able to stand between them, chin tilting up so he can make eye contact with you while you fix him up.
“Let me see.”
He holds out his right arm, palm up, covered in tiny scratches and sand from his poor attempt to escape from his new dragon. Seasmoke, he remembers. Addam squeezes your right hand lightly while the other cleans him up.
You barely manage to suppress a heavy scoff at the mess in front of you, but you dab gently at it with the towel anyway, soaked with water. “What did you do?” You ask, brows knitting together. “Did you try to run from it?”
“Yes,” He admits, face scrunching together at the fresh memory. You’ve told him to be careful of the sky-beasts constantly looming over the two of you, and he knows he’ll be scolded for trying to escape the damn thing.
You shake your head, mostly to yourself, and Addam’s shoulders deflate. “Well, what would you have done?” He asks, exasperated. “My apologies for wanting to come home to you tonight.”
You pinch his arm. “I only worry for you,” You say, voice soft. Addam and his brother, Alyn, are the only family you’ve left; you’d never known your father, and your sweet mother had died of a fever shortly after your seventeenth nameday. She hadn’t been able to last, to see you wed the man you love so dearly.
“…What will you say, when you see Queen Rhaenyra? She may think you are coming as a foe, to battle rather than service.”
Addam hisses as you brush against a particularly deep cut, eyes squeezing shut. “Sorry,” You say, and he only tips your interlaced fingers up to his lips and kisses the back of your hand.
Your husband pauses after he lets your hands back down, considering the weight of whatever his words to the Black Queen will mean. He almost thinks of it as a duty, to you and his brother. To further your ever so small family.
“I suppose the words will come to me when it happens.” He swallows harshly, eyes averted from yours, darting around like he’s telling himself to fucking think.
You’ve moved onto his other arm, now, and suddenly the odor of him has become unbearable. It’s nothing like anything you’ve smelled before.
Grimacing, you drop the washcloth and cover your nose with your hand, taking a step back. “What?” questions Addam, clearly confused. “What’s the matter?”
“Gods, you fucking stink. What is that?”
Addam laughs. He laughs, tension seeping out of him as he does. “It must be the dragon,” He claims, reaching out to grab your waist and pull you back towards him. “Don’t mind it, please.”
You’re unable to fight the smile you feel blooming, because despite the fact that your husband reeks of his new dragon sleeping outside your home, and your feet are sore from walking to the markets, only to find nothing, and your nerves are set ablaze thinking of his meeting with Rhaenyra, Addam is here. He’s here with you, holding you, safe in the comfort of your humble little home.
The feeling is fleeting, only settling in you for a moment, but you tip your head down to press a kiss to his mouth. “You must be vigilant,” You plead when you pull away, ignoring the way Addam’s lips seem to chase after yours. “And you must return to me. I do not know what I would do if I were to lose you.”
“I will be. I swear it.”
You brush away the dried blood on his cheek with the cloth, frowning. “We should leave, shouldn’t we? Fly to Essos, where we will be safe without the threat of war. That dragon is large enough to saddle three, isn’t it? We can go-“
A thumb soothingly presses against your lips, silencing you. “…If I can put the thing to use, it will strengthen us. Strengthen whatever I have with my father.”
Addam had always been desperate to get the same attention from Lord Corlys that Alyn had always seemed to receive after he’d saved the man. You’d never spoken to the Lord Velaryon yourself before, but it was hard to miss the way he’d stare at you when you visited your husband in the shipyard, almost melancholically.
“I do not care for jewels and gowns and for you to be gilded in glory, Addam,” You state, pushing his wrist away from your face. “I care for you. Should we not go now? I could find your brother.”
“No.” He shakes his head, standing from the bed, now towering over you. His fingers, callused from his seemingly never-ending work on Lord Corlys’s ship, caress your waist almost reverently.
Almost every inch of your skin heats up when Addam leans down to kiss your chest, right where your heart is. The skin is covered by the sea-blue gown you wear, a white apron tied about your waist, and you shudder at the feel of his lips on such an intimate spot.
He kisses up from your bosom to your mouth again, firm and sweet and longing. There’s no guarantee you’ll ever see him again, but some strange part of you feels that all will be well. It’s a naive thought, perhaps, but one you welcome nonetheless.
“I will come back to you,” He promises, voice rasping. “I love you.”
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moonstruckme · 3 months
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OMGGGGGGG
the first kiss was so cute!!! perfect!! james was so sweet and gentle w her😍😭😭
can’t wait to see there dynamic from now on
Thank you gorgeous! I held onto this so I'd have something to post this last part to, hope you don't mind <3
part 1 | part 2 | part 3 │ part 4 │part 5 │ part 6 │ part 7 │ part 8 │ part 9 │ part 10 │ part 11 │ part 12 │ part 13
roommate!James x fem!reader ♡ 1.5k words
James is buzzing while he makes breakfast the next morning. Golden morning light pours in through the front windows, brightening the kitchen and warming his back where he stands in front of the stove, the buttery smell of pancake batter wafting up from the pan. He’d gone to bed later than usual last night and slept hard but woke jittery, desperate to do something about the commotion in his chest. 
A run hadn’t done it, nor had replaying the previous night in his head, and now he’s convinced he won’t be able to rest until he can kiss you again. It’s your fault, really. Your little sighs, your careful touches, the way you’d tugged at the roots of his hair when he asked you to, like all this time you’d only been waiting for permission. You’ve fucked him. James will never be able to get over it. Now, all he can think about is getting more. 
He’s made more pancakes than a family of five could eat when he hears the stair creak. 
“Good morning,” he says, turning around just as you pad into the kitchen, quiet as a ghost. 
Your eyes are bleary, but they still manage to widen slightly as you take him in, along with the precarious tower of pancakes beside him. You’re in that sweatshirt he loves so much, sleeves hanging limply from your hands and hem hitting just above your knees. 
“Morning,” you say, softer than soft. 
“How’d you sleep, lovely?” 
You shrug, not quite looking at him. “Fine. You?” 
James grins. “Beautifully. You want some pancakes?” 
Your gaze goes again to the stack beside him, and he can practically see the quip brewing in your eyes. Doesn’t seem like I have much of a choice. Are you planning to feed an army?
“Sure,” you say in that same quiet voice. “Thanks.” 
James studies you, intrigued. “Great. C’mere, sweetheart.” 
He plates up a few pancakes, keeping one eye on you as he does. You seem disinclined to look even in his general direction, finding distractions with the stove, your plate, the weather outside. 
“How’s this?” He turns around with the plate. You take it cautiously, by the complete opposite end to avoid any possibility of making contact with his hand. James’ heart warms at the way your fingers just peek out from the sleeve of your sweatshirt to grasp the plate. He wants to kiss you until you don’t know what day it is. “Too many? Not enough?” 
“This is good.” 
“Yeah?” He doesn’t let go of the plate. He tilts his head, trying to catch your eye, but you evade him. He has a hunch that if he were to touch your face (and god, does he want to) he’d find it burning hot. “Are you alright?” 
Your eyes flit up to his for a half a second before fleeing again. You hum, the sound tense and pitchy. “Mhm.” 
“You sure?” he asks, matching your soft tone. “Don’t go getting shy on me now.” 
You look like you stop breathing. 
And ordinarily James might feel bad, but post-kiss James cannot be prevailed upon to treat you as cautiously as he ordinarily might. Unfortunately for you, your secret’s out. You’re lovely, you’d said, voice soft and breathy and mere inches from his own mouth, I like having you around. I do. I really like you. Also unfortunately for you, post-kiss James knows things. 
He slips his palm alongside your face, working his hand behind your ear and letting his fingers burrow into the hair behind it. You melt, leaning into the touch. Your eyes meet his. 
It’s grueling work to keep from smiling. “What’s wrong, angel?” 
“Nothing’s wrong,” you say, still quietly but now with more of yourself in your voice. 
“Really? Because you’re acting like we’ve just met.” 
“Don’t you—don’t things feel different to you?” You seem almost distressed, eyebrows hooking upwards just slightly, pretty eyes imploring. Your voice softens again, now more with intimacy than reticence. “I don’t know what I’m supposed to talk with you about.” 
James lets his smile loose, thumbing at the skin behind your ear before letting you go. “We can talk about anything you want,” he says simply, grabbing his own plate and leading you into the living room. 
You’ve got a perfectly good kitchen table but almost never use it, each preferring to eat your meals on the couch. He flops down, careful not to tip his pancakes onto the cushion as he crosses his legs underneath him like you’re at a sleepover. 
“So, have any fun dreams last night?”  
You smile. It’s as heart-stoppingly lovely as always, and James thinks his own probably doubles in magnitude in response. 
“A couple,” you admit. 
“Oh? What about?” 
Your smile goes sheepish, bottom lip slipping in between your teeth as if to impede its progress. You fork clinks against the plate as you start cutting up your pancake. 
James’ brain short-circuits. 
“You were in my dream,” he blurts. 
Your eyes flit up to his warily. “Yeah?” 
“Yeah. It was one of those weird, super vivid dreams where nothing really happens, you know?” You seem to relax a bit. James douses his pancakes in syrup, starting to cut them up as he talks. “We were here, and someone had spilled something on the rug—probably Sirius, to be honest—and it made this huge stain. I’d tried to pour baking soda on it, but the whole box had collapsed and it got everywhere. We were both sitting right there scrubbing with literal toothbrushes, and I think I was worried you’d be upset with me but you were just laughing.” His heart warms at the pseudo-memory, the hazy feeling of contentment that had permeated the dream. The sound of your laugh, exactly as sweet as in real life. “Your hands were totally covered in baking soda, and the rug was ruined, but we were both laughing our heads off.” 
You’re smiling again, a small, knowing thing. “Had you said something to make us laugh?” 
“No,” he says honestly, “I think it was you.” 
James is aware that he’s barely functioning. It’s almost too much to talk and cut his pancakes at the same time while you’re looking at him like that, like he’s the loveliest thing you’ve ever seen. It makes it both a relief and a disappointment when you drop your gaze. 
“Do you think the stain might’ve been a premonition?” you ask. 
He raises his eyebrows. “How do you mean?” 
You laugh, and he’s instantly spellbound, caught somewhere between fantasy and reality. It takes him a second to realize you’re touching the edge of his plate, tipping it up. James looks down. It had been nearly falling off his lap, his pancakes cut up into tiny pieces and syrup pooled near the rim. 
You look up at him, seraphim with the morning light brightening your features and the hint of a smile playing on your lips. He thinks of how soft they’d felt on his the night before, the way they’d fallen open like welcoming him home. 
“You were almost spilling syrup onto the rug,” you say, that rare and beloved teasing lilt to your voice. “It would’ve taken more than baking soda to get that out.” 
“See?” he asks. “You know how to talk to me just fine.” 
You look surprised, then self-conscious, though not nearly as bad as when you’d come into the kitchen a few minutes ago. He covers your hand with his to keep you from going anywhere. Sets his plate on the coffee table. 
“Can I kiss you?” 
Your eyes are wide. “Again?” 
“Yes, again,” James laughs. “And again after that, preferably. Only if it’s okay with you.” 
You shake your head, looking something akin to bewildered. “Yeah. Yeah, please.” 
He starts to lean toward you, and you meet him halfway. Already, it’s a bit different. There’s no tentative stillness, no slow yielding. Your lips are pliant and eager, parting and closing around his like you’re trying to get as much of him as you can. Your fingers wind in his hair without instruction, and James responds by placing his hand in that spot you’d seemed to like it so well last night, the material of your sweatshirt soft beneath his touch. You taste like his pancakes, the syrup sweet on your tongue. 
“Keep talking to me,” he murmurs, kissing the corner of your lips worshipfully, “okay?” 
Your voice is breathless. “Why?” 
“Because I like you.” He tugs at you, wanting you closer. “And I think I’ve put in the work for you to warm up to me, if it’s all the same to you.” 
You make a tiny, amused sound. “Fine,” you say. You grow bolder, kissing your way up his cheek, the top of his eyebrow, until your nose is nestled in his hair and your lips are caressing his forehead. “Consider me warmed.” 
James grins, unable to help himself. He thinks that becoming your friend didn’t go quite as he planned, but he feels as though he won in the end.
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buckyalpine · 4 months
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I was thinking about Bucky. A beefy Bucky. A beefy mob Bucky. Who is such a simp. I think now is the perfect time to talk about it cause I need some fluff and look at that, it's also my favorite @wifeofbarnes birthday!
Happy birthday sweet angel, I hope you have one filled with so much love ❤️️❤️️
-
Imagine a brooding beefy mob Bucky pining after his rivals sweet, shy daughter. He has no business liking her, her father was always teetering on the edge of putting a bullet between Bucky's eyebrows but Bucky couldn't help it. She's too cute. Too sweet. Everyone knows there's something between you both between the fleeting glances and the number of times Bucky's left with a blush on his cheeks whenever your around.
For someone who hates meetings, he's more than fond of going to your estate to talk over business with a man he hates so much. He's going to go to every single one of those meeting if it means he gets to see you. He never gets more than a few moments, no more than a few words before he's dragged away by Steve who isn't trying to get stabbed by one of your bodyguards.
-
Bucky swirls his crystal glass, the ice in clinking against each other as he takes a sip of amber liquid, seated at a private booth at the back of the club. The alcohol that's already warming his body heats him up even more when he sees you laughing and giggling with your friends, a cute little birthday girl tiara on top of your head.
Fuck, you were so perfect.
"You're staring again, you creep" Steve snorts but Bucky pays him no mind. He's too busy looking at you in your pretty dress, your hips swaying to the music. Tipsy, maybe even a little drunk, love sick Bucky wants nothing more than to get a moment alone with you but he's smart enough to wait.
Well, sort of.
"Go distract her bodyguards"
"You're going to get us killed"
"Then you'll die knowing it was for a good cause"
Sam and Steve shake their head as they wander off to find your security team, quietly instigating a small scuffle to keep them occupied. You step outside waiting for your car to pull up, frowning when a large black truck stops in front of you instead. The door opens and-
"Bucky, what are you doing!" you squeak as he pulls you into the back of his SUV, setting you on his lap before telling his driver to park in a secluded area and to leave for a "smoke break".
"I wanted to say hi" Bucky shrugs innocently as if its the most obvious thing in the world.
"And this is how you decided to say hi?" You giggle, feeling butterflies bustle around your tummy being so close to him. You could smell his cologne and the warm scent of whiskey clinging onto his lips; you wanted nothing more than to bury yourself into him. The pink on his cheeks deepened at you caught him in his little act, pretending he wasn't admiring you from afar the whole time.
"I didn't know it was your birthday" He shrugs again while you try to wiggle off his lap, worried someone might see you but he huffs and holds you tighter. "The windows are tinted" he reads your mind without you saying anything, feeling your body relax slightly.
"Wish you'd said hi to me earlier" You say with a sigh and Bucky doesn't like the way you look sad now. You would've loved to spend more time with him instead of hiding away like this.
"I can drop you home" He offers with a boyish smile and you shake your head because it's far too risky and there's no way you'd be able to get away with it and sneak it past your father.
"Not unless you plan on posing as the cleaning lady-
"I can do that"
"Bucky-
"I can pull off a maids dress"
"James"
"Then how about a birthday kiss" He cocked his head to the side playfully and you swear your cheeks couldn't get any hotter.
"Bucky-
"Just one birthday kiss?" He pouts and you can't believe this mass of tattoos and muscle is giving you puppy eyes with his pink bottom lip jutting out.
"I-
"Please, sugar?" He whispers, his fingers tracing nimble little shapes on your hips while you chew your lip nervously, giving him a nod because you can no longer formulate words. He leans down to press his lips softly against yours and you sigh at the little whimper he lets out, his hands pawing at you to hold you closer. He feels all warm and fuzzy on the inside, letting his arms hug your body extra tight.
"Another?" He whispers, lips brushing against yours with a plea in his voice and you giggle, kissing him again.
"One more?"
"Bucky"
"Please?" He smiles when you kiss him until you're both breathless, only pulling away when you need air.
-
Imagine how cute he'd be trying to spend more time with you as discreetly as possible. You're usually at home so that's his best bet so he'll work with what he can.
"Why is this large fuck around my house so often" Your father rubbed his temples seeing another message for a meeting to go over shipments and territories. "Seriously, he's here almost every week"
Bucky is able to pull it off for a bit but honestly not for long. He's sitting across your father and it's gotten to the point his guards don't bother waiting by the door because Bucky isn't even a threat. He always comes and goes like it's his own house and they're not blind, silently betting over if this will end in a war or wedding.
"For fucks sake are you here to see me or my daughter" your father finally huffs, no longer able to take Bucky's blushing and shifting after you left his office to give him a coffee. "You're here to see her, aren't you"
Bucky nods like a school child who got caught cause knows he hasn't been discreet with his crush. Your father contemplates tossing Bucky into the lake with rocks tied to his ankles but he's also seen the way you look at him and there's no doubt the feelings are mutual.
"God damnit"
Imagine wedding and 2 babies later, Bucky is still just as in love with you. The cutest part is he's still trying to be sneaky.
"You're married now, why the hell are you still trying to hide" Your father berates the mob boss while bouncing his grandson in his lap seeing Bucky tug you into the kitchen so he could kiss you. "You're 6 feet tall and built like a line backer, you can't exactly hide, son"
Bucky pouts at you while you giggle hearing your father snort from the living room.
"He's right, y'know" you nuzzle into your husband while he engulphs you in his arms. You squeal when he hoists you up instead and makes a beeline towards the bedroom. You still stir something in him to this day and since your dad was there to babysit anyway...
"Bucky, where are we going"
"To go make baby #3"
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bpmiranda · 29 days
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dear lord your writing might be the best i've read in my life 😭
i don't know if you particularly take requests or anything... but guess by charli xcx and logan has been swirling in my head for days 😵‍💫
there's just something about how you write that makes me even more feral for logan
Guess (Logan Howlett) nsfw
A/N: bf!logan, 18+ mutant reader (unspecified power), oral f! receiving, fingering, light knife play, semi public
It was like torture for Logan being able to smell you and not have a taste of what was underneath your skirt. You were very strict about not fooling around outside of the bedroom, however, but you also had never been with a man as determined and sly as Logan. “If I guess the color, can I keep them as a prize?” He asks against your ear, his hands on your hips as he is pressed to your back. His firm chest locking you between him and the kitchen island where you are preparing a snack before you go out with Rogue and Kitty.
“Logan,” You laugh, shaking your head in disbelief as his fingers slowly drum up your waist, tickling you softly. “I’m about to leave, can’t we just do this when I get back?” You ask, turning around in his arms to face him as you pop a chunk of pineapple into your mouth.
“C’mon,” He pleads with that smile and those eyes looking down at you so lovingly. “You just don’t want to cause you know I’ll get it right.” He smirks and you roll your eyes, shaking your head at him. “How many guesses do I get?” He insists, kissing your forehead softly and then your nose.
“None, because I’m not playing.” You state matter-of-factly as you cross your arms over your chest, tilting your head to the side as he kisses your jaw and then your pulse point. Logan whines softly against your skin and the sound makes goosebumps rise on your arms. “Baby, we just don’t have time.”
“The girls are giggling upstairs, taking their time, I can hear them.” Logan smirks, sucking a soft kiss onto the base of your neck. “We’ve got time.”
Your eyes roll as you think, of course they’re taking their time, and you sigh, “You get three guesses.” You finally give in and Logan’s lips continue working your neck as he knows it’s your most sensitive spot. “Don’t leave marks, Logan. I’m about to go.”
“Hm,” He hums against your shoulder as he ponders for a moment. “I know you only wear thongs with leggings,” He murmurs, pulling away to look at your face as you stand with an easy smile on your lips, arms still folded casually across your middle. “And you like to be fully covered when you wear a skirt, so it’s gotta be a pair of the lace ones.”
He’s right, but you don’t tell him, you simply shrug. The way your right eyebrow twitched in an involuntary, impressed response tells him he’s in the right ballpark, however, and he moistens his lips at the thought of your lace panties.
They fall right above your ass cheeks and are just see through enough to smell you, but very classy when they are the only thing you wear in the bedroom. Cute enough to still make you feel covered when you wear a dress or skirt. “Is it the blue ones?” He asks and you smirk as you shake your head.
“Nope, I wore those yesterday.” You said smugly and he chuckles. “Or did you forget?”
Logan gently smacks his forehead with his palm. “That’s right, I took those off you last night.” He winks and you roll your eyes, blushing at the reminder of last night. “Hm, is it the red pair?” He asks as he dips his head down and kisses the other side of your neck softly.
“No,” You murmur, your eyes closing as his tongue circles around the end of your jaw and then trails down your neck slowly. “One more guess.” You whisper, moistening your lips as you feel him grow hard against your hip.
Logan can feel your body giving into him, your hands press softly against his abdomen as he continues kissing and licking you slowly, riling you up as he lightly sucks on your skin. Slowly, as quietly as possible, he unsheathes one claw and kisses you gently as he carefully glides it along your thigh. You shudder at the feeling of the cool metal and Logan glances down and in the reflection of his blade he sees your dark green lace panties snug between your thighs. “Green.” He smirks, retracting the claw as he looks down at you with a pleased look.
“You cheated.” You smile as he lifts your black leather skirt up anyway, already kneeling down in front of you.
“You could’ve stopped me.” He retorts, lifting one of your legs, hooking your knee on his hand, and pressing his nose against your covered pussy. The action makes you moan softly, your eyebrows scrunched together as you feel your core clench for him. “Just let me kiss it?” He begs, large hands sliding up your thighs and you nod. Logan smiles as he lifts your thigh over his shoulder, kissing the inside of your leg softly as you grab onto the edge of the island behind you. “You smell so good, baby.” He sighs, pulling your panties down your legs and stuffing them in his back pocket. His lips circle around your clit and you stifle a whimper as he lightly sucks and then presses a kiss to your bud. You can feel the arousal dripping out of you and Logan continues after you don’t stop him. His tongue glides up and down between your folds, licking slow and teasingly, taking his time to taste all of you.
“Oh, Logan,” You sigh, your head falling backward slightly as he continues making out with your cunt. “Baby, you gotta stop.” You gasp as his tongue is swirling into your core and you become aware that you are still in the kitchen.
Logan moans in protest, suddenly and easily lifting you up to sit on the edge of the island and you lay back, holding yourself up on your elbows as he devours you on the counter like a meal. “Fucking delicious,” He growls into your pussy and you whimper at the feeling of two fingers entering you. “Wanna taste your cum, baby.” He says and you shake your head.
“Logan, n - not out here!” You stammer, one of your hands grabs a fistful of his hair while he is holding firmly onto your ass.
“You’re so close, baby, c’mon.” He groans, lapping sloppily at your cunt and you feel that familiar tension in your lower belly. Your legs tremble and you give out, succumbing to the wave of pleasure washing over you. Logan growls in approval, unbelievably turned on by having made you cum in the kitchen where anyone could’ve walked in and seen him devouring your very soul.
“Fuck, Logan,” You breathed out, watching him lick his lips and suck his fingers off with a blush on your cheeks. “Get off me.” You laugh lightly, trembling still as he is kissing your thighs and rubbing your hips.
“Stay home tonight, baby,” Logan tells you, sliding you towards him as you sit up so he can kiss you. You hum against his lips, lacing your fingers through his hair as you sigh. “I did win our little bet.”
“By cheating.” You smirk against his kiss.
“Still,” He says, wrapping your legs around his waist so he can carry you to your shared bedroom. “I told you I’d get it right, didn’t say how.”
I really enjoyed writing this one! Thank for your request, kind reader💕
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princessbrunette · 4 months
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boxer!rafe had his anger mostly under control. thats what the boxing was for. but no one’s perfect. there were times he’d slip up.
he’d developed the knack for being able to ignore the other men in the locker room at the fighting grounds. he had his own upcoming fights to worry about, his own family to feed — whilst he used to be a sucker for a good argument, it had become the least of his concerns. they knew that about him, therefore they knew what would get under his skin.
“ayeee, it’s pretty boy!” one jeered as he stepped into the locker room — sore, toned body trudging over to his usual locker to retrieve his stuff so he could get out and go home to you. he was used to the nickname, infact it had even been self proclaimed at some points on the ring. girls held up ‘pretty boy’ signs during his fights, upon winning multiple fights and climbing the ranks he was gifted a chain with ‘pretty motherfucker’ engraved on the pendant. it was nothing new to him.
the chatter continues in the room amongst the men, and he figures he can let his guard down now, knowing they wouldn’t be testing him. they’d heard of his rage through stories, rumours that he’d been in jail for killing a cop in his past. it intrigued people, wanting to see how far they could push him. just as the cameron boy is getting his gym bag together to leave, he’s brought into the conversation once more.
“right? i wanna start seein’ some newer faces in the crowd i’m gettin’ tired of the regulars.” the same douche that addressed rafe when he entered speaks, eyes flickering over to the younger guy in amusement. “hey cameron, got anyone you can bring to spice things up around here? how ‘bout that pretty wife of yours? maybe she can motivate me before the fight—”
he doesn’t get to finish his taunt, before in a flash rafe had pinned him the locker with a crash, doors rippling and padlocks clattering. he presses his arm into the man’s neck, jaw clenched and vein popping out his neck.
“fuck you say? huh? nah, go ‘head repeat yourself.” rafe threatens, practically growling through bared teeth at the man. the other fighter goes to shove him back, but the cameron man is unmovable. if there’s one thing he doesn’t play about, it’s you.
rafe stumbles back slightly, but it’s only to wind up and slam his fist into the man’s face when he dared to smile. the other men start to get involved now, trying to pull rafe off but it only made him angrier. “think that’s funny? yeah?” he yells, and punches the man again, the time harder. his skin cracks and blood splashes onto his knuckles as he continues. he knew this was going to result in at least a week suspension from the gym, and that was with the gym owner being fond of rafe. he shoves himself off eventually, the man groaning on the floor in pain.
full of adrenaline, rafe picks up his bag and heads to leave, but not without spitting out a venomous “lemme hear you talk about my wife again. i’ll kill you. a’ight?”
he’s not proud of himself by the time he’s arrived home. it’s been a while since he’d gotten angry like that, violent outside of professional boxing. it’s so soft in your shared home when he arrives, and it makes him feel ashamed. it smelled like you’d been baking fresh cookies, the house clean just for him. it melts him, because sometimes he couldn’t shake the feeling that he was still the monster he used to be. something that didn’t belong here.
he stops in the doorway to see you napping on the couch, looking delicate like a petal that had fallen off a flower, drifted in the wind and had just landed there perfectly. the small bump that had only just begun to show through your dress strains ever so slightly against the material and he scratches at his cheek. he shouldn’t be acting like this. not when fatherhood is approaching.
he busies himself off to the shower, hoping to wash the day from him. not long later, the sound of the water woke you — and you appear in the bathroom quietly, stripping yourself of your clothes and climbing in behind him. you press a soft kiss to the centre of his back because you could tell it’s tense, a telltale sign that he’d had a rough day. you don’t need to speak, not yet anyway as he relaxes slightly at your touch — feeling your tits press against him from behind and your swollen tummy when you lean forward. he lets out a long sigh, head running beneath the water.
hugging him from behind, you peer round to see his bruised knuckles. he hadn’t come home with those for a long time, he’d usually wrap them if he was going to spar or whatever.
“what happened?” you can’t help yourself, curiosity getting the better of you.
he presses his lips together, caught. he doesn’t wanna tell you what they said, make you uncomfortable. it’s not necessary and it would only make him mad all over again. he runs his knuckles under the water, ridding them of any of the left over dried blood that he wasn’t sure was his.
“ah i uh… i lost my temper… a little. s’not important.” he huffs, peeking briefly over his shoulder at you. you don’t question it, knowing it was potentially a sore subject. he feels another kiss on his back.
“s’okay.” you’re so nurturing, so gentle. your hands slide around his hip bones, caressing the veined skin on his lower stomach above his cock. the appendage jumps once realising what you were after. maybe it didn’t take long because of the soft kisses and your body pressing to his, paired with the day he’d had — but he’s hard in no time when you start palming at him.
he tips his head back under the water, the droplets racing down his toned back and shoulders as you slowly tug at him from behind, doing your best to relax him. “s’okay rafe.” you whisper once more. “you’re home now.”
he certainly was.
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eglerieth · 11 months
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Some of y’all are not appreciating Bilbo Baggins enough. I am here to remedy that. This guy has:
• somehow managed to establish himself as a respectable, staid hobbit by the time he was fifty, despite being both a grandson of Bullroarer Took and the Shire champion of pretty much every aiming-game known to hobbitkind
• had an in-depth debate on pleasantries with a random guy passing by in the street, who turned out to be GANDALF
• collapsed in front of his own fire shaking and muttering “struck by lightning” over and over again in response to hearing about dragons and danger
• mind you, this was after he screamed loud enough to startle a roomful of Dwarves
• signed up for a dangerous quest completely outside of his league out of spite
• when told to scout out a mysterious light, saw some trolls, and instead of reporting back with the information, decided to PICK THE TROLLS POCKET
• arrived in Rivendell for the first time and said it “smelled like elves”
• upon meeting a strange creature that visibly wanted to eat him, he decided to play a riddle game with him- and guessed pretty much every one, and made up his own riddles, afraid and alone, that not only were good and full of linguistic puns, but actually stumped the other guy- AND THEN CHEATED AND WON WITH A QUESTION
• showed mercy to said strange creature who wanted to kill him, and was now standing between him and freedom
• eavesdropped on the dwarves arguing over whether to try to save him, then popped up casually smack in the middle of them just as they were debating
• somehow managed to sleep like a log at the really really high eyrie full of wild predators
• found himself in a bad situation, said eff it, and turned around and antagonized and fought off an insane amount of man eating spiders, like enough of them that fifty was a small portion, by singing at them with incredibly complex and punny insulting songs composed on the spot, while simultaneously slaying them in multitudes despite having zero combat training. Seriously, we don’t discuss enough how epic the spider scene is.
• broke a company of dwarves out of the very secure prison of the Elvenking by inventing white water rafting with barrels
• charmed his way out of being eaten by a dragon
• stole the frickin Arkenstone from the guys who employed him, one of whom was a king
• took part in an epic battle, only to be knocked out in the first ten minutes and miss the entire thing
• was named elf-friend by the guy who’s prisoners he sprung
• wrote his own autobiography, complete with all the narrative recognition of his own heroics
• spent 60 years writing said autobiography
• taught his lower class neighbor’s kid how to read
• taught his nephew Elvish- not only Sindarin, but Quenya too
• spent decades telling his cousins his own story as fairy tales, complete with character impressions accurate enough that one of them was able to fool a servant of the Enemy with a second hand impression
• used the One Ring of Power to hide from his neighbors
• planned an elaborate feast with multiple social faux pas to mess with his neighbors, complete with a purposefully bewildering speech and culminating in him vanishing into thin air in front of everyone
• left his cousins and neighbors very unsubtle passive aggressive gifts in his will
• settled into Rivendell, randomly befriended the heir to the throne of like half of Middle Earth, and apparently spent his time writing very personal poems about his hosts and reciting them to crowds of elves
• after being invited to a Council of basically every major kingdom in the continent, spent a quarter of the time reciting vague poems about his friends, a quarter of the time telling anyone who would listen about his heroic past, and half the time interrupting to ask when lunch would be
• volunteered to bring the ring to Mordor
• became one of only four or five mortals in history to live in Valinor
Seriously, Bilbo Baggins may well be the most chaotic, insane person in the entire legendarium, and that includes the likes of people like Finrod “bit a werewolf to death to save the life of guy who he just met and gave up his kingdom for” Felagund.
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... how am I meant to get any sort of restful sleep when it's like 85F indoors in my bedroom at NIGHT .. hhhhhhhhhhhhhh
#why the next poll adventure and everything else has taken so long lol.. I straight up have just not done anything#the past few days... staring down my todo list and sweating hopelessly#AT LEAST it;s relatively low humidity. the highest it's been up to is maybe 65%. but is usually around 50 or 40ish#There is one small window air conditioner in a roomate's room that can KIND OF be shared by nailing a sheet up to block off the hallway#with the rooms in it so the cool air goes into the other bedrooms but doesnt flow out into the kitchen or etc but#wjhen it's the time of day that the sun is directly hitting the window & it's like 102F outside even that doesnt help much. to cool 3 rooms#and I always feel like we're going to explode the air conditioner or something running it too much with direct heat on it. sometimes it#smells like hot plastic or whatever ghj.. so it's mostly just.. block off all windows with 5 layers of blankets and cardboard#starting at 10am (meaning.. no indoor light for days basically.. no natural lighting.. time passes weird. hard to determine time of day).#throw water on the bed every night so you sleep in wet sheets and keep your clothes and hair wet at all times. ice. cold drinks. keep a#little fan running pointed directly at you nearly 24/7 even when sleeping with a fan blowing air on you makes your eyes and throat painfull#dry. etc. etc.. and i KNOW people have it worse in plenty of places blah blah. i am just complaining on my little blog that is about me lol#I think the biggest thing about lack of adequate/central air conditioning for me is just the LACK of productivity!!! I am working on games!#and novels!! and so many other crafts. costumes! sculptures!!! things I want to do!!! we all have a limited amount of time on this planet a#nd I have so many goals!! To lose basically 4-5 days straight or producivity - when if I had been able to temperature#control my environment better I could have easily gotten more done because I wouldn't be laying around nuseous and too hot#and sick to do anything all day etc. -- is like.... GRRRRRR... it just feels so senseless.. i could have USEd that time...#Every CEO who has contributed to global warming owes me 1million doallrs to fund my art projects and make up for all the time#I've lost on them due to their stupid bullshit.. also they should be stoned to death in a public square. but redistribute the money FIRST#to everyone on the planet. but especially people who have been affected by floods. fires. etc. etc.#poor people who have limited choice in housing and access to air conditioning. homeless people in cooling centers. people with disabillitie#and health issues that are worse in the heat so the entire future just seems increasingly terrifying for them. etc. etc.#ANYWAY.... eughhhgh.... It can cool down SLIGHTLY at night but the past few nights I have been sleeping in an 81 degree room and I wake up#and first thing in the morning its like 82 by then and I'm so nauseous and nasty feeling... just so so tired of it.. I NEED SNOW#literally not even joking.. snow would heal me. .. oughffff...#AND i got the new nasty stinky poo poo pee pee tumblr dashboard update lol.. e v i l
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pucksandpower · 5 months
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Crazy Cravings
Max Verstappen x wife!Reader
Summary: pregnancy cravings can make you (and your husband) do crazy things … neither of you particularly minds
Warnings: 18+ content and pregnancy
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You sit in the Red Bull Racing garage, feeling the warm Spanish sun on your face through the open door. The roar of engines and whirring of power tools surrounds you as the mechanics prepare for the race.
Your eyes are drawn to the iconic blue and silver cans scattered around the garage. Those tantalizing cans of Red Bull that everyone else seems to be drinking so casually.
Everyone except you and Max, that is.
You rub your rounded belly, feeling your precious cargo kick and squirm inside you. At six months pregnant, your cravings have been … intense, to say the least. But none more powerful than your longing for the crisp, fizzy taste of Red Bull.
The caffeine is off limits, of course. You would never dream of jeopardizing your baby’s health. But oh, how you crave that sweet, energizing flavor that used to be such a routine part of your life.
Max emerges from the back room, his bright grey eyes instantly finding you. He strides over, that effortless confidence and raw athleticism making your heart flutter, even after all these years. His gaze drifts to the Red Bull can in a mechanic’s hand and a grimace crosses his face.
“Liefje, are you alright?” He murmurs, brushing a stray lock of hair from your face. “I know how much those are torturing you lately.”
You force a smile, not wanting him to worry. “I’m fine, Maxie. Just … ignoring the siren call of carbonated temptation.”
His thumb strokes your cheek as he studies you, clearly not convinced. Max has been so incredibly supportive during this pregnancy, abstaining from Red Bull himself in solidarity. Cutting out his biggest vice, just so you don’t have to be tormented by the sight and scent of it everywhere.
“We should get you out of here,” he says, looping an arm around your waist to help leverage your bulk out of the chair. “The smells can’t be helping those crazy cravings.”
You open your mouth to protest, not wanting to pull him away from his work, but a fresh wave of dizzying desire hits you as a mechanic cracks open another can. The fizzing hiss and unmistakable scent make your mouth water uncontrollably.
“Max ...” you whisper, feeling your throat tighten with barely restrained craving and hormonal tears prickling your eyes.
He follows your yearning gaze to the Red Bull can and understanding dawns. “Oh, liefje ...” Scooping you into his arms, he strides from the garage, shooting an apologetic look at his crew.
Once outside in the fresh air, you bury your face against Max’s shoulder, inhaling his familiar, comforting cologne as he carries you to the motorhome. He eases you onto the couch, brushing kisses along your forehead and temple.
“I’m so sorry, schatje,” he murmurs, anguish lining his handsome features. “I hate seeing you suffer like this. If there was any way I could make the cravings stop ...”
You catch his hand, lacing your fingers through his calloused ones. “Max, you know I would never actually ask you to give up Red Bull, right?”
He shakes his head fiercely. “Not being able to have it for nine months is nothing compared to your sacrifice, carrying our baby. I don’t deserve you.”
Pulling him down beside you, you cup the chiseled line of his jaw, making him meet your gaze. “I happen to think you deserve the very best, Mr. Verstappen. And right now, the very best for both of us would be ...” Your voice cracks with fresh longing. “A damn Red Bull.”
Max’s eyes blaze with sudden determination, that iron willpower that has made him a champion coming to life. “Then that’s what I’ll get you. If those tossers at Red Bull Company won’t make a safe, caffeine-free version for pregnant women, I’ll personally make them regret it.”
You laugh shakily. “Max, you can’t just bully a corporation into creating a new product line for one person’s weird craving!”
“You’re not just one person,” he growls, tangling his fingers in your hair and bringing his forehead to rest against yours. “You’re my everything. And our baby deserves for its mother to be happy and have her cravings satisfied.”
Pressing a fierce kiss to your lips, he adds, “I’m calling them right now. And then straight to the CEO, if I have to. I’ll get you that Red Bull if it’s the last thing I do.”
True to his word, the indomitable Max Verstappen spends the next several days working every possible connection and calling in every favor. You catch bits of conversations, his clipped tones making it clear just how serious he is about this bizarre quest.
“No, I don’t care if it’s not ‘cost-effective’. This is for my very pregnant wife ...”
“She’s risking her health to grow an entire person! The least your company can do is make a freaking caffeine-free energy drink ...”
The crew quickly learns not to open any Red Bull around you, lest they face the wrath of an overprotective Max. Which is slightly embarrassing … but also incredibly sweet.
Your hormones most definitely approve.
Finally, there’s a break in the stalemate. Helmut Marko himself shows up at the motor home, those bushy salt-and-pepper eyebrows furrowed.
“Max, this is ridiculous. They will not reconfigure an entire product line just because Y/N is having a little … craving.”
You brace yourself for the explosion, but Max just levels Helmut with that intense stare. “If you could experience these cravings yourself, you would be singing a different tune. Y/N is sacrificing everything to have our baby. The least Red Bull can do is give her a safe option to have the flavor she misses so much.”
Helmut’s expression softens slightly at the obvious devotion in Max’s voice. “You know that corporate will never go for it. Not for just one person ...”
“Then make it for all the other pregnant women dealing with the same issues,” Max returns, unruffled. “Or is a company that plasters ‘Gives You Wings’ on every can really too cowardly to follow through on empowering people?”
You suck in a shocked breath at his daring play. But the flicker of anger and resigned capitulation in Helmut’s eyes shows that it worked.
“Fine, you little shit,” the older man growls. “I’ll talk to product development. But I’m not making any promises!”
Except somehow … Max’s sheer bullheaded tenacity eventually batters through all the corporate resistance and red tape. Three weeks later, an unmistakable bright blue can appears on the counter, the iconic Red Bull logo stamped across it.
“What’s this?” You ask in confusion.
Max slides an arm around your waist, beaming proudly. “Open it and see.”
You crack the seal, sniffing cautiously … and almost melt at the nostalgic, beloved scent of Red Bull. But just as you start to panic about caffeine, you notice the slightly different flavor.
“Max, is this ...”
He nods, grinning. “Zero caffeine but all the taste you’ve been craving. No more tears over those damn energy drink cans, okay?”
Throwing your arms around him, you yank his head down to capture his mouth in a grateful kiss. “Have I mentioned lately how incredible you are?”
“Once or twice,” he jokes, then sobers, cupping your belly. “There’s nothing I wouldn’t do to make you and our baby happy.”
“You’re giving me everything I ever wanted and more.” You take a long pull of the perfectly flavored liquid, sighing in blissful satisfaction. “We hit the jackpot with you, Max Verstappen.”
He kisses you again, reveling in your obvious enjoyment. “The only jackpot I need is right here.”
***
Your baby bump has popped out to truly impressive proportions now at eight months along. What started as an innocent craving for Red Bull has escalated into an all-out physiological war.
Nothing seems to satisfy you for long — you’re a walking bundle of hormones and insatiable desires.
From the plush solitude of the Red Bull hospitality suite, you try not to gaze wistfully toward the Ferrari encampment. But you can’t resist fixating on the tantalizing cones of rich gelato constantly streaming from their hospitality tent.
Watching a couple of Ferrari mechanics stroll by, licking at scoops of pistachio and stracciatella, is enough to kickstart a powerful new yearning. Your mouth waters shamelessly as they pass, the creamy dessert leaving you weak in the knees. Before you can overthink it, you’re shuffling toward the entrance, one hand cradling your belly.
“Scusi,” you call out hesitantly as you peek inside. “Mi dispiace … is it possible to get some gelato?”
You half expect to be waved away — it’s well known that the Ferrari team is notoriously insular and protective of their spoils. But the cheerful greeting you receive is instantaneous and overwhelming.
“Madonna mia! Look at this beautiful piccina!”
Suddenly you’re engulfed by a whirlwind of chattering Italian voices, greeted by smiling faces from the team of elderly signoras who comprise the Ferrari hospitality staff. Weathered hands pat your belly and cheeks, clucking sympathetically at your swollen state.
“You poor bambina, absolutely enorme! Of course we’ll get you some gelato to refresh you. And biscotti too! You need to keep up your energy, si?”
You’re ushered toward a plush sofa, various grandmotherly types fussing over you like you’re the most delicate, precious thing. It’s … surprisingly wonderful. They clearly adore babies and pregnant women. You get the sense that indulging a mother-to-be is hardwired into their very beings.
A tray of gelato cups appears, the rainbow of flavors almost dazzling in their variety — chocolate, pistachio, prickly pear, lemon, stracciatella. Before you can reach for one, it’s plucked from your grasp.
“No no no! Leave it to Nonna Maria.” A stout signora with a green paisley dress and frosted silver curls shakes her head sternly. “I’ll start you with the lemon to whet your appetite. Then a nice creamy stracciatella as a proper treat for the bambino.”
The tangy flavor of the lemon gelato hits your craving exquisitely. As soon as you’ve polished off that cup, Nonna Maria presents another brimming with the creamy chocolate chip perfection of stracciatella. You moan in appreciation, unbothered by the chorus of approving noises from your doting new entourage.
Before you know it, you’ve been plied with cups of hazelnut, strawberry, and caramel flavors as well. These hospitable Italian ladies simply won’t be deterred from pampering a future mamma. As you scrape the last smears of gelato from a ramekin, a new grandmother settles on the sofa beside you.
“Now ... tell Nonna Gina what this little maschietto or bambina has been craving, eh?” She pats your belly affectionately. “We have chefs who can whip up anything your heart desires!”
Is it a pregnancy thing, this sudden wave of tears that blurs your vision? Or just being so insanely touched by the kindness and maternal care of these lovely strangers? You blink rapidly, swallowing hard.
“Honestly … gelato has been my biggest craving these past couple days. I don’t know if I can eat another bite.”
A chorus of disapproving gasps and tuts rises from the assembled grandmothers. “Bah! This pregnancy has ruined your appetite, piccina,” one crows, waving a hand dismissively. “We’ll soon get it back to rights, don’t you worry.”
For the next hour, you’re lavished with attention, fussed over and coddled like the most precious jewel. Cold drinks and chilled towels appear to keep you comfortable as the nonnas take turns sitting with you, petting your belly and swapping outrageous birth stories.
Their colorful Italian voices swell and ebb as they bicker over whose recipe for pasta al ragu is most authentic, who has the most grandchildren, and whose first-born grandson is most handsome.
It’s chaos and noise and overwhelming affection … and you’ve never felt so utterly content.
As the afternoon light slants golden through the awning, a familiar figure appears in the entrance, haloed by the fiery rays.
“Liefje? I’ve been looking everywhere ...” Max’s disbelieving gaze sweeps over the scene in front of him — you, surrounded by a veritable coven of grandmotherly Italians who seem entirely absorbed with you. “What in the world ...”
A chubby signora with a bright orange shawl wrapped around her ample form hops up, beaming widely. “Ahh! We have been absolutely spoiling your beautiful wife, of course. Did you know she had a craving for gelato? Well, no problem for us — we have taken her like one of our own bambinas!”
The others cluck and murmur in outraged agreement at his shocked expression.
“We absolutely will not let a piccina in such a state go hungry or uncomfortable! Now you sit down so we can get you a plate of some proper food too!”
Max gapes at you, utterly nonplussed as you grin back at him with unabashed glee, utterly stuffed with Italian desserts and reveling in the indulgent babying. You pat the space beside you invitingly.
“You’ve got to try Nonna Gina’s tiramisu, Maxie. It’ll knock your socks off.”
He settles beside you, slinging an arm around your shoulders and still looking rather dazed. But the instant the first warm smile and pat lands on his arm or knee, Max’s expression melts. This team of fussing Italian grandmothers has clearly adopted you both as their own.
Nonna Maria reappears, shoving a plate stacked with crispy arancini, indulgent risotto alla Milanese, and a creamy slice of tiramisu into your husband’s hands. “Eat up! You need to keep your strength up too, caring for this sweet cosa bella.” She plants bristly kisses on both your cheeks before scurrying off again.
Max watches her go, then turns to you with a bemused chuckle, squeezing you close. “Well, schatje. I have to hand it to you — at least your pregnancy cravings bring you to some … interesting places.”
You hum in agreement, perfectly content as you snuggle against his side. “Can you really think of a better place for me to nest?” You grin as another nonna appears to pat his cheek, welcoming him into the chaotic fold. “I think I may have just found my second family.”
He tilts your chin up, eyes sparkling with warmth. “Anything that makes you happy and keeps our baby healthy.”
As he kisses you tenderly, surrounded by clucking encouragement and rapturous croons of “bello, bellisimo” from your new Italian grandmothers, you know you’ve never felt so blissfully cherished.
You and Max make your way slowly back to the Red Bull motorhome, stuffed to the gills with gelato and trailed by a gaggle of besotted well-wishers calling out farewells and advice.
“I still can’t believe you managed to befriend the entirety of Ferrari hospitality,” Max laughs, helping ease you onto the couch in his driver’s room. He nudges your belly playfully. “This little one is shaping up to be quite the international charmer!”
“Says the man who single-handedly compelled Red Bull to create an entirely new product line,” you point out, patting your swollen middle contentedly. “I have a feeling this baby is going to be the most spoiled child on earth.”
Max settled beside you, gathering you close with a tender smile. “Can you blame all our people for wanting to give the world to you two?” His thumb traced your jawline reverently. “You’re carrying a little miracle, liefje.”
Your breath catches, as it so often did when he looks at you like that. Like you’re his entire universe. With so much pure adoration and love shining in those grey eyes.
“Our miracle,” you correct softly, cradling his calloused hand over your belly. “I couldn’t have done it without you. Not just supporting me … but giving me everything I could ever dream of.”
He opens his mouth like he wanted to protest, but you press on, needing him to understand how treasured he makes you feel.
“You don’t stop until I’m happy. Even when I get these raging, random cravings that probably seem crazy, you move heaven and earth to give me whatever I need. Most people would never ...”
“Neither of us is most people,” Max interrupts fiercely. He presses a searing kiss to your lips, then the swell of your abdomen. “You and our little one are my entire world. I’ll spend every day showing you how much I love you both, how grateful I am to have you in my life.”
Hormones raging, you pull his mouth back to yours, savoring the taste and feel of him surrounding you. When you finally part, you rest your forehead against his.
“In that case, you better rest up for tonight,” you tease. “I have a feeling that someone’s going to get a craving for sardines and waffles right around midnight.”
***
At nine months pregnant, you feel like a blissfully beached whale.
Your belly protrudes so massively that you can barely see your feet anymore. Simple tasks like tying your shoes or rolling over in bed have become awkward geometric obstacles. Max has to help you up from every chair or couch, his strong arms levering your frame into a vertical position.
Lingering in the paddock is no longer an option either. You’ve been gently but firmly ordered back home to Monaco to prepare for the baby’s arrival.
Thank goodness your nesting instincts are going full tilt — otherwise you might go stir crazy waiting for this little one to make their grand debut. You’ve rearranged and re-organized the nursery a dozen times, washed and rewashed all the tiny onesies and miniature accessories, and baked enough lactation cookies to feed an army of nursing mothers.
Really, there’s only one craving occupying your mind now …
The thump of shoes in the hall makes you look up eagerly. Max appears in the doorway of the sunlit nursery, loose waves of brown hair framing his face. The plain white tee stretches enticingly across his chest and shoulders, making your mouth water for an entirely different reason than food.
“Hey schatje,” he greets, eyes crinkling at the corners as he takes in your flushed cheeks. A knowing smirk tugs at one side of his mouth. “Were you just ... thinking about me?”
You shake your head adamantly, wincing as the motion makes your whole body ache in protest. “Maybe just a little. This particular craving is getting out of control.”
Crossing to you in two strides, Max cups your jaw and brings your lips crashing together in a searing kiss. His tongue sweeps demanding and possessive into your mouth, making you whimper faintly. That intoxicating masculine scent of fresh sweat, motor oil, and sandalwood surrounds you in an alluring cloud.
After all these years, just the taste and smell of your husband is enough to drench you in molten wanting. Baby or no baby, Max Verstappen is still the sexiest goddamn thing on two legs.
“Mmm, I know exactly what you need,” he rumbles against your neck, nipping a tingling path along your sensitive skin. “Luckily for you, I’ve got a free schedule all afternoon to help take care of this craving ...”
He scoops you into his arms effortlessly, cradling your heavy weight against his chest to carry you to the bedroom. You twine your arms shamelessly around his neck, luxuriating in the hard strength of his body against yours.
“Aren’t you worried about ... squashing the baby?”
“Not at all,” he deposits you carefully on the bed. Those bright grey eyes darken with blazing lust. “I’m going to take such good care of you and our little one.”
His hands and mouth seem to be everywhere at once — caressing, nibbling, and stroking every sensitive inch he can lavish adoring attention on. You keen softly when he dips his tongue into your navel, rubbing reverent circles over the tight swell of your belly.
“You’re so gorgeous like this,” Max murmurs, lips brushing the crease where your torso and bump meet. “So ripe and round and radiant with our child. My beautiful, strong girl ...”
All you can do is lie there gasping, overwhelmed in the best possible way. He strips you methodically, leaving a trail of scorching, openmouthed kisses over every newly exposed inch.
“My sexy little pregnant wife,” he husks, tongue dragging up the slick crease at the apex of your thighs. “Can’t resist this craving can you, liefje?”
His fingers plunge inside you, curling expertly as his mouth closes over your throbbing bud. You throw your head back shamelessly, mindless with pleasure as Max devours you.
So good, so unbearably good …
He ravishes you thoroughly, sending gushing waves of release crashing through your body over and over again until you’re gasping and quivering. Atoms of blissful satisfaction hum in your bloodstream as you float back into sweet oblivion.
An insistent nudge against your belly slowly rouses you. Max looms over you, hair deliciously rumpled and eyes glittering wickedly. “Did I satisfy that craving sufficiently? Or should I keep going?”
Your mouth curves in a greedy smile, hands gliding over his flexing shoulders and chest. “Again, please ...”
It had long since become a running gag around the paddock and team — before you were advised to stop flying. When you couldn’t be located, someone would joke that you must be off ravaging your utterly besotten husband yet again.
Max took the ribbing with surprising grace, grinning unrepentantly whenever his shirt collar revealed another blossom of lovebites discoloring the skin of his throat.
You really didn’t care about the teasing. You’re indulging an entirely healthy and normal craving — just a wife thoroughly appreciating her man.
“Can you believe people used to call this a punishment?” You giggle breathlessly one afternoon.
Max nips a stinging path along the soft skin of your inner thighs, tracing tantalizingly close to your heated center. He laves his tongue soothingly over the reddened marks, leering up at you from between your parted legs.
“Let them call it whatever they want. I’m just taking advantage of your hormones making you insatiable for me.”
“Mmm, well I can’t seem to resist your obscenely perfect body either,” you admit with a lazy stretch. “Maybe we really are being punished.”
One dark brow wings up eloquently as Max drags his eyes over you in a deliberately insolent perusal. Taking your leg in hand, he licks an achingly slow, filthy stripe up the crease where thigh meets hip.
You choke on a whimper, whole body jolting as he sucks a blossom of wet kisses into the satiny expanse of your inner thigh. Those bright grey eyes hold yours in wicked challenge as his clever tongue massages and swirls over your sensitized flesh.
“This certainly doesn’t seem like punishment to me,” he husks darkly. “Does it feel like punishment when I do this ...” His mouth moves higher. “Or this ...”
By the time he finishes torturing you into a quivering, needy wreck, you’re more than ready to beg.
“Please, Max!” You sob, bucking helplessly against the maddening sensations. “I need you, oh god I need you so bad ...”
He settles heavily over you, nuzzling your hair aside to trail searing kisses along your damp throat. “Then you shall have me. My needy wife can have whatever she craves ...”
It’s midway through one such shattering round of lovemaking that Max’s phone begins to ring shrilly. You try to disentangle, burning embarrassment tinting your cheeks, but he simply growls and clutches you tighter.
“Leave it!” He bites out, surging forward to recapture your mouth in a bruising clash of teeth and tongue between thrusts. “I’m busy ... satisfying … my wife ...”
After, as you lie tangled in a sweaty heap of satiation, you can’t resist asking with a wry smile, “Was that another craving I just demanded you satisfy?”
Max props himself up on one elbow, thumb stroking idly along your abdomen as his piercing gaze roams over your flushed, disheveled form.
“Whatever my wife needs,” he responds huskily. Those burning eyes promise infinite carnal delights to come as they caress your body. “I’ll always crave giving her everything she desires.”
He stretches beside you, a blissful smile curving his lips as you snuggle up against his side to exchange lazy kisses.
You’ve got a sneaking suspicion this is one craving that might outlast the pregnancy ...
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halemerry · 1 year
Text
So there's a lot to unpack here but I want to start by talking about the ending and specifically about the Metatron and the calculating moves made at the end of episode 6.
Every single piece of what happened there was a manipulation technique being employed against Aziraphale to an almost brilliant degree and I'm honestly a little obsessed with what this says about the Metatron in particular.
Let's go in order.
First of all. We see him order coffee. In a human body. Something sweet and sugary. He talks to Nina and asks her about her shop name. Does anyone ever ask for death? And when she tells him no they don't his response is to say "so predictable". Our introduction to him here even when everything about him reads like a sweet old man is presented to show us someone who reads the world in terms of being predictable to him.
He then shows up in the middle of Aziraphale's existence being threatened. He immediately cuts down the threat's authority (using outdated language like Az himself would favor) and reemphasizes his own connection to Heaven. When Michael doesn't recognize him and he puts her down and then directly engages Crowley. Crowley who, to Aziraphale, has for centuries at a minimum been someone he thinks is smarter, better, more Good than these other archangels. The Metatron validates these beliefs. Crowley is more Heavenly than these archangels who couldn't even recognize the voice of God when he was standing right in front of them.
The Metatron draws attention to the fact he's in a human body. The kind of body Aziraphale has been in and loved for nearly 6000 years. He then banishes the archangels, implying their morality is in a gray space, and validates Muriel someone we have seen Aziraphale react positively to and someone outside the current power structure. Look at me, he's saying. I see and validate the little guy.
He then tries to talk to Aziraphale. Aziraphale says "I've made my position quite clear." And then the Metatron offers Aziraphale the coffee. This bartering chip, consuming sustenance, is a thing that Aziraphale and Crowley have used as their connective tissue for centuries. It's an olive branch for them. It's giving Aziraphale bodily pleasure and the Metatron implies that he himself has partaken also - a thing we know that Aziraphale has struggled historically with moralizing. He is seen by the closest thing he has left to his parent and he is having old fears validated as safe and old habits being played upon to make him feel secure
He then REMOVES Aziraphale from his home turf. Not only does he remove Crowley from the equation but he takes Aziraphale from the place that has stood as a place of sanctuary throughout the entirety of the season. The shop is Safe and Aziraphale is leaving it and he is leaving the one person who might be able to smell the bullshit coming from the Metatron. The music notably turns absolutely dire here.
The next time we see them the Metatron tells Aziraphale that he doesn't need to answer instantly. He can take his time, if he likes. All the time he needs. And then tells him to go tell Crowley. Once again bringing Crowley in as a valid part of this while manufacturing a scenario where he can't possibly be.
Az ends up in a place where he's overwhelmed and confused and he wants so badly to believe what he's being told. It's an appealing thing from his perspective! He feels off kilter like he's made a mistake in judging the Metatron. He can't even fully articulate what happened to Crowley at first and he's had absolutely no real time to actually think it through. He's running on sheer reactive energy.
The Metatron starts their conversation by asking Aziraphale's opinion. Who should rule Heaven? This is once again playing into making Az feel validated and like he's a part of this decision making process. The Metatron corrects him, complimenting Aziraphale and making him feel capable and in control. He reassures Aziraphale's bafflement. And draws attention to some traits that, while true of Aziraphale around Crowley, are not his defining traits in the eyes of Heaven. You don't just tell people what they want to hear I find particularly notable in this regard given Aziraphale spent most of his time on earth actively lying to Heaven and doing just that. But it fits into the narrative Aziraphale has built around himself, especially post Apocalypse. The Metatron then says I need you (a phrase Az will use much more painfully here in a minute).
And even after all this Aziraphale says no. He says flat out he doesn't want to go back to Heaven. He says this!!! And then the Metatron sweetens the pot. He swaps tactics. Not once has this come up until Aziraphale pushes back against the idea. If the Metatron could've gotten him without using it I have no doubt he wouldn't have bothered with it. Come to Heaven and we can save Crowley. Aziraphale loves Crowley. Aziraphale thinks Crowley is better than any of the angels he's interacted with. Crowley is Good and Nice and Kind and always saving him and now he's being presented with a way to return that. He can Forgive Crowley - a thing Crowley has always presented to Aziraphale as something he struggles with. All of these things Aziraphale has watched Crowley react to in a way that belittles himself or distances them from one another. Of course he wouldn't consider that maybe what he was actually saying is "I'm unforgivable and I don't want that forgiveness."
The Metatron offers Aziraphale a Dream Offer for the pre Armageddon Aziraphale. You can keep your Crowley. You can heal him like you have always thought he deserved. You can have power and control the people who for your whole existence has beaten you down. It can go back to how it was but BETTER.
When Aziraphale leaves he still hasn't answered. He goes and has the conversation they have. It's intense and emotional and the Metatron comes in after the Moment all casual and asks how it goes, knowing fully well the shitstorm he had just set up to get created. And then he turns around and says "always did want to go his own way" which is not only true of Crowley but framed as a bad thing despite the fact that he has just spent twenty minutes or so telling Aziraphale that he's done his own thing and that is Good. He is playing both sides of this perspective as it suits him. And then he cuts down Crowley asking questions, pressuring Aziraphale to avoid doing the same. He then proceeds to ask Aziraphale not if he's made up his mind but if he's ready to get started. He is one by one closing off exit routes to this thing as Aziraphale starts to look more and more panicked and indecisive. He makes sure the bookshop is in good hands and asks Aziraphale if there's anything he needs to take with him. Letting Aziraphale have the illusion of choice while cutting down "I don't want to" as an option altogether.
And Az, as soon as the Metatron is out of shot, tries to express this. And then he falls back right on old coping methods. The Metatron pats him on the head. Reassures that he's the right one for this. That he is Good. That his particular skillset is needed here.
It is a masterstroke of manipulation. A very dark twist on what we see Crowley do time and time again with Aziraphale throughout the millennia. Familiar in a way that makes Aziraphale feel safe. Except this time this is being used to put him back in line. It's brilliant and painful and it fucking hurt and I need a season 3 to see the Metatron get what's coming to him stat.
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feyascorner · 8 months
Note
Hear me out! Hear me out!
From Astrion's pov
A Tav who hates physical contact.
But then one night when it's pouring rain Tav comes to Astarion's tent feeling scared and ask if they can stay and then one thing leads to another and suddenly the two of them are cuddled together and Astarion is like "I thought you didn't like being touched" and Tav is like "Normally I'm scared people will hurt me when they touch me. But you are different. I feel safe with you. I trust you."
a/n. I’m going to collapse they’re everything to me AHHH THIS IS SUCH A CUTE PROMPT
Astarion, by nature and by the two-hundred years he’s spent as a vampire spawn, is a touchy person. It’s instinctual. A habit he can no longer break. It’s not even sexual, half the time. It’s simply how he conveys the words that he struggles to say, even if his vocabulary is filled to the brim with flowery verses of love straight from a romance novel.
But he understands the aversion for touch. Because he’s spent so much of his life hating the touch of strangers against his skin, he understands when you recoil when one of your companions attempt to hug you, or someone tries to shake your hand. Even if yours doesn’t stem from the similar situations where he had to set out on a victim under Cazador’s orders, he understands what it’s like to simply dislike it.
He doesn’t touch you, even if his hand itches to brush the stray strands of hair out of your face. Even as he has to yank his arm away when he feels it nearing yours as you walk alongside one another. Even as all he wants to do is drag you to the nearest corner and beg that you just hold his hand.
So when you appear at the flap of his tent, barely shielding yourself from the thunderous weather outside, asking if you can stay, his jaw physically unhinges.
He coughs, gathering himself quickly—or as quickly as he can manage.
“Come here, darling. You’ll freeze away with that mortal body of yours.”
He doesn’t even know how it happens. Well, he does, but he doesn’t really believe it’s happening. Only fifteen minutes later, you’re snuggled in under his blankets, pressed tightly against his side. He stares up at the ceiling on his back with wide eyes, slowly turning to look at you.
“Is this…alright?” He asks, and you peek out from one eye, adjusting your head on his arm. He can smell your shampoo from so close—lavender? No, maybe another blasted flower he doesn’t know the name of…
“What is?”
“This,” he waves his free arm between the two of you. “Don’t get me wrong, darling, you know I’m never against a cuddle, but I thought you—well—“
You stare at him expectantly.
“I thought you disliked physical contact,” he says, softer. “Not just with me, obviously. In general you seem rather opposed to the idea.”
The thunder rings from outside and your brows crease deeper. The light from a lightning strike illuminates your faces briefly before it’s a dim darkness again, with nothing but your own eyes able to adjust just enough to make out one another’s features. He’s sure he sees more than you do, considering his familiarity with the dark, and uses it to notice the way your lips purse at the intrusive sounds coming from outside.
He also notices you leaning closer to him, but hesitant. Your movements are unsure.
If he had a heart, it would’ve been pounding now, surely.
So he curls his arm closer, pushing you into his chest in the process. You tense briefly, but melt into the feeling, and he lets out a breath he hadn’t realized he’d been holding. “Are you afraid?”
Your voice is but a whisper. “Not anymore.”
There’s a comfortable silence hanging in the air for what seems like hours, but he might consider them to be just a few minutes. The rain pounds relentlessly against the tent, but here, even through the thin fabric, he doesn’t even notice it anymore.
“You’re different from everyone else,” you mumble, and he looks down at his chest to see your eyes halfway shut, clearly about to doze off. “I know you won’t hurt me…there’s no reason for me to avoid touching you.”
He blinks, and you bury half your face into the fabric of his shirt.
“I want you to touch me.”
For the first time in decades, Astarion finds himself at a loss for words. He’s said worse things, sure, but coming from you?…
After filing through a dozen possible responses, he settled on one, opening his mouth to respond, but your breath is already heavier. You’ve already left to a dream world he cannot follow you into, and you’ve left him in a state that he would’ve considered humiliating with anyone else.
He stares at the ceiling again, listening to the soft rhythm of your breathing.
“You can’t just say that and then fall asleep you fool…”
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