#i’m fr writing a fanfiction as we speak

[anthonysdemo]

little quick regulily sketch because it’s always “do you ship jily, jegulus or jegulily?” justice for regulily REAL

[vargskelegore]

okay wait—shuri and reader at a college party??

STOPPP OKAY WAIT this has always been on my mind... what if it was a 90s THEMED COLLEGE HOUSE PARTY!!!!! LIKE WHAT!!!!

i’m currently writing this headcanon while listening to let the beat hit ‘em by lisa lisa & cult jam and crush on you by lil kim ft. lil cease & biggie.... but my other playlist is a great example of what i think would be played at this party: https://open.spotify.com/playlist/3aVTa1pDTD4dUcUPcgQJY8?si=bcb0cd1b5c64493a

again, i switch between 2nd and 3rd person when i do headcanons. so sorry if its confusing!! and as always, this is black reader.

imagine reader is getting her the perfect outfit for it tho..

reader is a cheapskate and would absolutely take her to the thrift store

tbh reader just like me fr

anyways the perfect 90s outfit is made for shuri at the thrift

we talking about a whole ass tracksuit as we have seen before

not that goofy shit thats usually costume pieces, a real ass vintage tracksuit

WITH THE SHADES LOL

fine as hell.... giving stud zaddy amen.

as for reader, i think they are channeling their inner lil kim... change my mind.

reader is a bit of a thickie in my eyes so its just perfect

especially since they’re a majorette

so fast forward to the party itself

shuri just does not leave readers side bc reader knows this stuff better than her

it’s all fun and games til reader is approached by one of her fellow majorettes

“girl i think you should go do the dance battle!”

shuri is quite literally about to choke on that damn punch (reader told her ass not to drink it but because shuri is shuri, she did it anyway.)

“..shuri are you okay with me going down there?” reader has these puppy eyes, they’re a bit worried about leaving her alone, but shuri reassures them that its ok

“no, it’s fine! go have fun-- i’ll just be here.” she has this cute ass smile on her face and thats all reader needs before she goes out on the dance floor.

the song that’s playing??? why you get funky on me by today (obviously from the house party movie soundtrack, duh!!! that movie is iconic)

the dance battle is against this freshman 

that’s actually pretty good at dancing

but reader is better, obvi. they’re the leader of the majorettes.

that battle is pretty intense.

and if you thought shuri wasn’t looking

why would you think that

you already know shuri was staring mad hard at reader behind those shades.

we talking ‘why is the room suddenly getting so hot????’

shuri you know damn well why.

anyway, this dance battle is obviously something reader wins.. why wouldn’t they???

when reader goes back over to shuri, she is trying SO HARD to make it seem like she was casually watching

the tension between them now? unreal. crazy. reader definitely thinks its giving slowburn fanfiction.

and of course come & talk to me by jodeci is playing. u must be out of yo damn mind if u didn’t think it would.

everyone else is on the floor dancing but reader and shuri are just standing in a corner with cups in their hands, staring at each other.

who tf is gonna speak first now????

“...”

“...”

“i hope you enjoyed the-”

“i thought you did really well.” not reader and shuri speaking at the SAME TIME. so cliche but needed.

the giggles that escape both of y’alls lips??? ugh unmatched so cute

that entire time shuri is really wondering if this’ll be more than just a friendship. because she hates to admit it, but shes falling for you HARD.

every night she goes to bed thinking about reader but this just made it worse.

now shes gonna be thinking about reader and their gyrating hips (not like she wasn’t already tbh, reader is a majorette after all and shuri goes to every damn game LOL)

as the night is coming to a close, you two leave the party at around 2 am.

shuri drops you off at your room first before walking to her own dorm.

the moment shuri gets into that bed, shes cursed with those thoughts about you.

and don’t think reader wasn’t thinking the same.

the tracksuit and shades combo had them in a chokehold.

more than reader would like to admit.

[michaelsfavgirl]

boo, you’ve inspired me a lot and I fr want to start writing Michael imagines but I’m scared that I’m not gonna have motivation, no one’s gonna read them, and that I’m just gonna flop completely 😭😭

can you pretty please give me some advice if you can bc babes idk 😭🙏

Omg that’s wonderful!! Don’t be scared, the mj fanfic side of the fandom was literally non existent on here when I first posted my fics and now look there’s more of us <3 We need more mj writers!!

Listen you really have to get the thoughts of “no one’s gonna read them, they’re gonna flop blah blah” out your head, and I know it’s hard but trust me the best way to KILL your motivation is by relying on external validation. Of course I’m not gonna sit here and say that people reblogging and commenting on fics won’t give you more motivation to write but that can’t be the only reason/source. So try to remind yourself that you’re doing this for yourself, for fun, as a hobby etc.

Now when it comes to writing advice, first find out what style of writings you’re most comfortable with and length. Do you think you’ll prefer to write a few thousand words or shorter fanfictions? Do you want to write one-shots, headcanons or drabbles? Try to experiment more or less with all to see what you’re best at.

Then, if a blank page intimidates you (I relate) try to just word vomit all your ideas/things you want to mention in your fic, like a little summary. To make this even less intimidating use the text to speech button and just start yapping. Then you’ll be able to use that as some sort of guideline.

While writing try to include both mikes and readers/ocs perspective, even if you’re writing from the first point of view. (Btw I’d recommend using the second or third pov, but you can do whatever feels more natural) this will make the readers feel more connected to the story and want to continue reading. Also don’t waste time by being too descriptive about things that don’t add much to the story, there’s no need to describe the outfits, or morning routines before your characters meet up yk, unless it’s necessary/integral to the plot.

When it comes to writing dialogue (if you’re gonna go for Mike) try to recall his interviews and the way he speaks, use similar language and even phrases/words to make the conversation feel more natural. Trust me most people hate when the dialogues seem unrealistic and fake, it shouldn’t feel like reading about your own oc who just has mikes appearance and name, if that makes sense.

[blurglesmurfklaine]

Would love to know more about Love and Fanfiction 👀

HI SULLY!!! I feel like I haven't "seen" you around (probably bc Life and Work and also I follow over 700 people khdbfskhd) but I have missed your presence in my virtual space!

SO. Love and Fanfiction is the "IRL Besties; Online Worsties" AU that's been rattling around in my head for a while. It'll definitely be a few months before it's closed to being finihsed, but the gist of it is Kurt and Blaine are bffs in real life, but online they have Beef. Kurt is a popular fic writer and Blaine is a gifmaker for the same show (but different ships). It's utterly ridiculous and completely self indulgent but it do be livin in the old noggin rent free <3

I don't have much of this written AT ALL but here's the opening scene:

starchildofthenight: KURT starchildofthenight: THAT ENDING ON CHAPTER SIX OF STARING AT THE SUN??? ARE YOU FR?? SAY SIKE RN starchildofthenight: if I were less dignified I might give a keysmash

elizabethelphaba: Elliot, please. You read tentacle porn. There’s not an ounce of dignity left in your body elizabethelphaba: but also thanks for beta-ing, you’re my number one fan ❤️

starchildofthenight: thanks??? ohionians are so rude. even when they’re complimenting you

elizabethelphaba: that nightbird guy must be from Ohio, too then

starchildofthenight: I wouldn’t know, he never tells anyone anything about his identity starchildofthenight: but I do know he’s not that bad  starchildofthenight: I love his gifsets ngl. we chatted for a while the other day, on the Aathan server! I feel like you two would get along tbh

elizabethelphaba: [press X to doubt] 

starchildofthenight: message received

elizabethelphaba: okay I’m not going to convince you to not be friends with him but!!! he’s SOOOOO ANNOYING!  elizabethelphaba: like. who tf makes a call out post for breaking *internet ettiquite*?? It’s not like I doxxed someone! He only did it because I’m a caaron shipper, too…

starchildofthenight: well… you DID post hate in the Aaron X Nathan tag

elizabethelphaba: listen, I’m a Twitter refugee. This site is CONFUSING for me elizabethelphaba: almost as confusing to me as multi shipping Carson—no offense! I just truly don’t see the appeal, but I love it for YOU

starchildofthenight: if the smut’s good, the smut’s good 👀  starchildofthenight: speaking of smut…

elizabethelphaba: I’m not writing you caaron tentacle porn

starchildofthenight: Aaron would make the sexiest alien… Carson would sooooo secretly be into it

elizabethelphaba: JAIL!!!! STRAIGHT TO HORNY JAIL!! 

starchildofthenight: you can’t send me to horny jail, I’m the warden 😘 

[i-did]

hi hello i couldn't sleep last night so i was scrolling thru all ur asks and stuff and ur opinions and analyses are so interesting!!! and then afterwards i was thinking about what u were saying about mlm smut and i'd also been thinking about such things a little bit recently bc like.....at a certain point it becomes quite clear that the vast majority of smut-writing is just imitation. like there's the sex noise verb list and all and the whole general mechanics of the sex and those things just .... replicate over and over. and the whole thing w people writing mlm vs wlw smut regardless of their own sexual orientation..... like i feel like a big part of that is just a self-perpetuating thing. like if u have not had sex and u r getting all ur (pleasure-related) sex ed from fandom (even if u do watch porn, that doesn't rlly tell u how to describe stuff? idk) regardless of What fandom , the majority is going to be mlm smut. which is itself majority imitation of other mlm smut, imitating and imitating back to whoever knows what the first smut fanfic was etc. there's just way More to mimic than there is on the women side of things. which then becomes a self-perpetuating thing, bc the mimicry continues and generates more and more. and---if there are fundamental misunderstandings of anatomy involved---those self-perpetuate as well. and maybe even exaggerate. and yeah. does this all make sense? idk i was just thinking about it. like all the stereotypes and stuff continue bc writers are getting their inspo from other writers rather than their own brains. or something. idk!!!!! it's just all... divorced from reality? bc words. or something!! i hope u get what i'm trying to say. just thoughts i've been thinking. anyway i think ur thoughts are cool. and ur writing. ok bye have a good day!!

Okay yeah this is kinda messy but hope u see this, uhh yeah I think you're right about the echo chamber effect fr about stuff. I think it's a mix of projecting too sometimes. talk more under the cut and also link to a video essay since I love video essays.

Here’s a video that sort of touches on this topic: 

“Gay fanfiction” by Sarah Z. (has CC)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=H8E_C00dKwI

This video begins to talk about fetishization at the end, but also… not really. The words “gay fanfiction” is used as a catchall, when really gay fanfiction is largely mlm written by non-mlm.

Fandom is a largely women's space dominated by the female gaze in a media industry world that is dominated by men and the male gaze. I'm really glad women have this space to explore creativity and queerness, and I don't expect the female gaze to go away, but I am still ultimately bummed out I can’t read most fanfic or interact with most fandom spaces without having fetishization in my face. 

So about 80% of fandom is women, and most of those women aren't straight, but 90% of those women prefer mlm ships. Why don’t they prefer wlw ships? Well definitely part of it is the fact that queerbaiting is centered around white straight men, and then there is also the fact that women tend not to be written as well charcter wise. But the fact still remains that you get jerjean getting priority over Layla and Alvarez who are in canon just as much and are a canon wlw couple who actually interact as well as Alvarez could likely be a woc because of her Hispanic last name. Korasami doesn’t get nearly as much hype as zuko and saka, despite the fact that they are 2 fully dimensional characters who canonly kiss and hold hands, something the creators fought for and ended up having to sacrifice another reboot for. 

I do believe the fandom echo-chamber is largely responsible for… a lot of things, like you're saying. But what's interesting is that the complaints I've heard about visual porn from non mlm in the fandom space is that they can’t get off to it because its for the male gaze and misogynistic usually. But they also don't seem to notice how the mlm smut circles has the female gaze and is also… almost always mlm. If it was a pure anatomical not knowing thing, I get that, but I also think that leads to the question of “then why the male body for porn, and not your own? The one you know and are familiar with?” 

I know some people want to get outside of their own body for porn and don’t want to think of their own anatomy at all, but overall I'm still uncomfortable. If an anglo said “well I watch porn of only Mexicans so I don't self insert” I'm gonna be like … hhhh in a similar way. I understand people “like what they like” but I wish they also noticed said patterns in the first place. I understand the t4t tumblr porn circle, and how it's different from cis people who only watch trans porn. 

I actually wished that instead of fandom focusing on mlm ships where some asshole guy hits on bottom troupe charcter for top troupe character to save, was instead… a wlw character experiencing said shitty getting hit on and other wlw swooping in. what's interesting is fandom writes a lot about misogynistic experiences without often realizing it. Ive read fanfic where guys get called sluts for sleeping with people or called bitch for speaking their mind, these arent things men usually experience, but rather women. Fandom has a lot of internalized misogyny and also queerphobia imo. Women characters often get pushed to the sidelines and men become the canvas for female fans to project onto. 

There is this natural inclination to mlm. When people are talking about “gay shipping” or “gay books” or “gay feels” or even just “gay” mlm is what’s largely in mind. I honestly am kinda saddened by this because if gay fanfiction was really solely about writing more to feel represented, then you would see a lot of bi and ace and lesbian rep, but this isn't the case. Queer women are seriously underrepresented, and I want to hear their stories and read them in fanfiction as well as published. 50% of lgbt literature is mlm, and of that its largely written by women. Becky Albertalli, Rainbow Rowell, Maggie Stiefvater, are the YA big names and are all women writing mlm. Red white and royal blue is written by Casey McQuiston and Captive prince (which is not YA) is written by C. S. Pacat, who is non-binary, but is also TME and not mlm. These are all the big names in mlm lit, behind them is some gay men, but honestly their stories aren't preferred, they're not the right “flavor” for the consumers usually, who are largely women. In general YA consumers and authors are women, but I wish that they… just wrote about women too. I think there is a certain… snowball effect to the overrepresentation of mlm representing the whole LGBT community that leads to fetishization, as well as misogyny playing a factor in: less women characters being written well to write fanfic on, when they are written well they're taken less seriously or the audience struggles to relate to them, they're less marketable then men. 

Idk I never feel “seen” or “represented” by any of the books above, which don't address boyhood and manhood and queerness intersecting really, and AFTG doesn’t either. I relate to AFTG as a trauma victim who has experienced a lot of what many of the characters go through and have gone through in the EC as well as them just overall being very well written characters, but I don't relate to it as a mlm really. I've never seen like.. gay voice or being straight passing or femphobia or how boyhood can be affected from a young age by those around you sensing you're ‘other’ or if you didn't experience this you feel outside the mlm community. Let alone sub cultures like bear and leather and pup, at most you see the word “he's such a twink” in fandom which... i fr hate non mlm using that word because it's usually used to replace the f-slur essentially, used derogatorily or to call him “such a bottom” and stuff like that. It’s like a joke or an insult.

Long story short, idk mang this was a ramble and I think I'm coning down with something. I wanna see more queer women rep and women authors writing about being a queer woman too. I think it's a complex web of fetishization and a bit of forbidden love yaoi culture (or it used to be in the BOYXBOY days) as well as misogyny on an industry level, creator level, as well as reader/consumer and fandom level. I don’t think it’s inherently wrong to explore other peoples stories and what we read has to be segregated, “only mlm are allowed to read and write mlm, only wlw are allowed to read and write wlw,” but I also think author’s intent and audience and background is telling, as well as overall statistics. Like about an hour ago I was looking for cookbooks in spanish or in english, and I was looking for some mexican food cook books, but I had to look for them using words in spanish because otherwise what came up was a bunch of “fiesta party, easy as uno dos tres authentic cooking!” and I was like… hm. Since I could tell they were marketing to anglos. (also the author’s last names were like michelle smith, james cooper, and this could be for a variety of reasons, but I trust Hispanic names more tbh and deadass would look at the authors pictures and if they had other books in Spanish or what their specialties were.)

anyways. not sure how to end this. uhm if anyone has any book recs (my to read list is like 500 books tho no joke) preferably not YA white mlm written by a white lady, hopefully queer women written by queer woman, LMK, I need more wlw and queer women stories on my list. I have a decent amount but always looking for more. I kinda wanna link my goodreads or my storygraph but I also don't want to get doxxed and it has my legal name on it so.

Also, I'm dyslexic and using spell check but if there's like some wild typos my b.

[honeyedlashton]

Ok buckle in babies, we’re making a ship list. (Part 1)

(I don’t know why I’m making this other than the idea gave me dopamine and I like gay shit.)

Basically I’m gonna be going through each ship and going through the realness, the type of relationship they have, whose top and whose bottom, and overall how much they hype each other (in interviews, on twitter, on live-streams. You name it.) Then I’ll be grading them on a scale of 1 to 10.

Now first a disclaimer: I’m making this ship list is based solely on my opinions, the evidence I’ve seen, and what the tarot cards have told me. And even though it’s fact in my mind doesn’t mean it’s fact for real. So honestly just enjoy them cause we’re in for a wild ride. Feelin good?

Good. Let’s go alphabetically shall we?

1) Cake

Cake is a great ship. I think it’s one of the more plausible ships in 5sos cause you better believe giggly baby boy Luke loves him some Calum. I think this relationship is actually just a booty call though. Like Luke and Calum are friends with benefits, I have no doubt about it.

Look at that.

So needless to say the top and the bottom are pretty obvious. Luke being a bottom, and Calum being the top. Take one good look at both of them together at /any age and tell me I’m wrong. Calum could beat the shit out of Luke anytime. It just helped when he got muscles.

Luke was trying to get dicked down in this live stream, and the one before that. Fr. Quarantine’s got this boy going crazy. And generally on twitter they’re flirty. And Calum Luke’s to roast Luke a LOT.

Final review of Cake: 7/10

—————————————————

2) Cashton

An unbreakable bond. The best of friends. Two sides of the same chaotic coin. They’re as real as it comes. If Ashton does something, Calum’s there. You cannot separate them. And why would you want to?

Now I don’t think that Cashton fucks, let’s be completely honest. Who the hell would top? I feel like Calum is more likely to bottom than Ashton, but he’s not likely to bottom with Ashton. They’d fight over it. Physically. Full brawl beatdown. So no drunk hookups for them. But I feel like they probably do send porn to each other, smfh. They’re chaotic.

They hype each other up all the time. As best friends do. They wrote a fucking song about their friendship sober, and then another one drunk. Ashton has now been seen writing Calum fanfiction, it’s done. They’re inseparable. Name a more iconic duo.

Final review of Cashton 8/10

—————————————————

3) Lashton

Ok I know. I’m a bit biased on this one... it is my handle, but, it’s my handle for good reason. I mean where should you even start with these two? I mean obviously they’re real. Obviously they’re real. If you choose an interview—any interview—and focus on either one of them, they’re likely looking at each other. Like they’re the kings of staring at each other when they shouldn’t be. Get a fuckin room already, damn.

You don’t have to watch him all the time buddy. He’s not gonna disappear. And not to mention everytime they’re beside each other, THEYRE

ALWAYS

TOUCHING.

Like there is so much more, this is just a basic search through commonly used gifs.

So I’ve seen a lot of discrepancies between who tops and who bottoms, and you can’t tell me that Luke could ever top Ashton. I’m sorry, but I’ve seen the outline of Luke’s dick in leather pants, and to think he tops anyone is a stretch. But Ashton? No. Ashton tops.

Maybe he was verse way back in the day? But after he got muscles and started wearing bandanas? The days of bottom!ash were done. I’m really sorry guys. I hate to do it to you. But Luke is a soft boy who likes being picked up, and Ashton likes caring for Luke too much to be his sub.

Speaking of care, Ashton could write a dissertation sized paper on how much he loves Luke. He would go on about it. And has. Numerous times. He always tries to boost Luke’s confidence, and sometimes roasts him as well. Tell me that’s not boyfriend moves right there. And it’s constant. Ashton is in love with Luke. And that’s the point.

Final review of Lashton: 10/10

—————————————————

Ok that’s part 1. And I’m only breaking it up, cause there’s only 10 images per post. What a fuckin rip off. Anyway, part 2 soon and we’ll go into the three M’s cause Mikey deserves love and his own post.

[shookethbrooketh]

my pointless gatsby essay

a few days ago i mentioned that i was reading the great gatsby for class and that i wrote a paper on nick’s sexuality. some of you expressed interest in reading it, so now that i’ve finished reading the book and added in some feelings about the ending, i’m posting it so you all can read! 

a couple things: i literally wrote this for no reason. we had assignments similar to these for another book we read where i just wrote my opinions about one particularly stupid part of the book, and i wanted to it here so i just...did. if it makes the experience more hysterical for you, you should know that i let my teacher read this, and she read the beginning in the middle of my class (without my knowledge) yesterday and then i do not think she read any more. she agreed with me, though, so it’s a win. 

also, i actually honestly think nick is just gay, but the argument i made here is that he was bisexual because a) i was only about halfway through the book when i wrote the majority of this and at that time he seemed to be quite into jordan, and b) i really did not feel like trying to defend the point that he was not at all into women. you’ll be able to tell when you push ‘read more’ that i definitely had enough to say without that. it’s a solid 1250 words. have fun. 

The day I finished reading Chapter 3 of The Great Gatsby, I took to Google in search of reassurance that other people were asking the same question I was. It became clear to me that I was not alone when I typed in “Is Nick fr,” and there it was: “Is Nick from Gatsby gay?” The answer is...complicated. Although he begins dating Jordan Baker midway through the book, there is still widespread confusion surrounding Nick’s sexuality. Why, you might ask? He’s got a girlfriend--end of story. Right? Wrong. Although life would be a heck of a lot easier if it did, human sexuality doesn’t work like that, so here we are. The fact of the matter is that Nick is a heavily closeted bisexual, and he is being absolutely used by Gatsby for that. 

There are a few non-Gatsby-related clues that Nick is bisexual. For starters, he introduces each new character, male or female, with intricate and often physical detail. He narrates effectively about the physicality of characters regardless of their gender; for example, this description of Tom: 

“Not even the effeminate swank of his riding clothes could hide the enormous power of that body--he seemed to fill those glistening boots until he strained the top lacing and you could see a great pack of muscle shifting when his shoulder moved under his thin coat. It was a body capable of enormous leverage--a cruel body.” 

This quote, quite frankly, made me violently uncomfortable the first time I read it, so clearly either Nick would not mind being taken down by Tom or we need to have a serious talk with F. Scott Fitzgerald. Not to mention the odd scene where Nick disappears for FOUR HOURS between midnight and 4:00 AM with the sole memory of standing beside a bed with a half-naked man who was earlier described as feminine and was holding  a “great portfolio.” Let’s just say that by the end of Chapter 2 some alarm bells were going off in my pea-sized brain. 

Now for the real argument: Nick is clearly infatuated with Jay Gatsby. He wrote two entire paragraphs--one in Chapter 3 and one in Chapter 4--simply about the captivating, caring nature of Gatsby’s smile. He even details later in Chapter 4 how he “held out” against Gatsby’s smile, as if it was some force drawing him into something he refused to be a part of. Overall, the entire situation of Nick and Gatsby’s first meeting screams “21st century fanfiction.” Simple, normal Nick gets invited to a fancy party and chooses to go. He starts talking to another simple, normal man who offers to take him out on the water in the morning, and it feels as if everything is falling together when suddenly he realizes his “date” is actually the party’s affluent host. He is left alone with the female friend he came with, and suddenly he becomes almost obsessed with the man he was speaking with, asking his friend about him with a sudden sense of urgency. I’ll be fair--that is an utterly ridiculous analogy. Still, it checks every box, and it seems as if Gatsby is as aware of it as I am. 

Gatsby has this odd mystery about him--every move he makes is tactfully chosen, and he seems to have a global knowledge of anything related to Daisy. Because of this, it is clear that the only reason Gatsby is friends with Nick and Jordan is because he believes he can use them to get closer to Daisy. He uses his inexplicable charm to draw Nick in and convince him to help Gatsby get the girl he’s been lusting after for years. In his one valid statement in the entire book, Tom told Nick this at the end of the book: “[Gatsby] threw dust into your eyes just like he did in Daisy’s…” This statement, in and of itself, can be taken in a romantic light, but it also shows how Nick has been a bit manipulated by Gatsby. I will acknowledge that Gatsby displays many extremely relatable qualities that come together to create a characteristic I like to call “disaster gay” (literally the entirety of the panic in Chapter 5). However, Nick is the only main character in the novel who displays heavy bisexual tendencies, and Gatsby seems to be using this to his advantage. 

Finally, Chapter 9 is an emotional experience for all of us. Nick is profoundly affected by Gatsby’s death as he is left to grieve almost completely alone. Although he says in Chapter 8 that he never really liked Gatsby, his narration in Chapter 9 tells a different story. Even with Gatsby gone, he feels as if it’s him and Gatsby against the world. He’s found himself suddenly in charge of Gatsby’s funeral, growing more and more distraught with each person that disrespects the dead Gatsby. Most tellingly, he feels as if he had to care for Gatsby, or at least find someone else to be with him. Nick has this inexplicable obligation to Gatsby that screams “unrequited love” forcefully at me until I become emotional. 

All this being said, the most interesting part about it all is that I’m completely and wholly wrong. Anyone who says that F. Scott Fitzgerald would have written a bisexual narrator in the 1920s is utterly kidding themselves. Human sexuality wasn’t even perceived as more than “one or the other” until much later in the 20th century. The truth of Nick’s sexuality lies not in the text but in the reader’s perception of said text. The simplest answer to this difference in perception and reality lies in the identity of the reader, but even that doesn’t wholly explain the situation. If the narrator were a woman, chemistry between her and Gatsby would be clear to many more readers. Of course, that shows that, as is, the perception of the relationship is dependent on the reader’s experiences in life; however, it also shows that some of the misconception lies in the general culture of the 21st century. 

The vast majority of the examples I provided for Nick’s bisexuality were really written to establish mystery surrounding Gatsby’s character (or simply because Fitzgerald’s writing was excessively descriptive). He clearly had no intention of sending the message that we receive today, but in 21st-century culture, mystery and romance are often intertwined. We’re so used to correlating mystery and romance that sometimes one can come off as the other. Regardless, the best part of fiction is that it’s completely fictional. Nick can be whatever readers make him into (aside from blatant, major misinterpretations), and choosing to spend my time after we finish the book reading academic papers about Nick’s sexuality is both well within my rights and perfectly valid. 

Some side notes: 

In my research for this, I ended up on Ao3--not to read anything (spoilers, y’know), but to see how many works there were on this and what specifically was going on there, but, despite my attempts, I still managed to spoil Gatsby’s death for myself. Just so we all know the sacrifices I’ve made here. || Update: Now that we’ve finished the book, I’ve taken to reading here, and I think this is what's going to keep me sane during what I’m choosing to call the coronacation. 

I’d also like to say that I’m very suspicious of Catherine and her tendency to run off to random places across the world with other women, but we never heard anything from here again, so this is all she gets.  

[benewol]

Tag Game

Tagged by the talented @bokutokoutarou and my waifu @cuddlyasahi - I will gladly answer both sets of questions and hope to get to know you two even more <3

1) Do you speak any other languages? If not, then what language would you like to learn?

Yes, I do! Besides English, I also speak German and Turkish. I’d have also wanted to count French in there, but I can only understand majority of what’s said IF the person speaks slowly lmfao and my grammar is a bit rusty!

2) If you could erase your memory about one show/book and experience the thrill of watching it as if it were the first time again, what show/book would it be?

Interesting question! Probably Psycho-Pass tbh. That anime just put me through so many different emotions and made me question humanity more than just once. These little ‘a-ha’ moments were incredibly mind-blowing and, even though it consisted of a lot of angst, crying can feel cathartic!

3) Would you rather be able to time travel or read minds?

Time travel! Be Marty McFly and shit haha no but fr reading minds would be so depressing. Imagine being able to read humans’ minds, it’s bound to be unsettling

4) Who is your favourite anime character of all time?

Oh god... Tough question... Ok you know what, this goes against everything I’ve said before and I strongly believed myself to be trash for Oikawa, but I feel really strongly for Iwaizumi so I’ll just choose him instead. He’s just quite honestly a very decent man and a well-developed and well-presented character.

EDIT: Who am I kidding, it's actually Oikawa. I love his genius self. 🥺💕

5) Do you like your name?

My name? Yes! It’s a very unique way of expressing how important I am to my parents. :)

6) Would you ever do any extreme sport like sky diving or bungee-jumping?

Definitely!

7) Who was your first crush (if you’ve ever had one)?

Uhhhh wdym? You wouldn’t know him, right? It was someone from my kindergarten group lol

8) Are you more book smart or street smart?

Book smart!

9) What job would you be terrible at?

Anything that requires precision! I am way too impatient to bother with that stuff.

10) What never fails to make you smile?

My friends’ and siblings’ bickering. c:

1) What do you treasure the most right now?

Being able to be with my family in these times of crisis.

2) What are your top 5 hobbies?

1. Listening to music

2. Singing

3. Reading fanfics

4. Playing the trumpet

5. Writing fanfics

3) Where do you want to be right at this moment?

By your side to cuddle with u bb :c

4) What’s your favorite anime/show?

Probably Haikyuu!! lmaoooo

5) If your favorite character could come to life and marry you, where would you like to get married?

I wouldn’t really have a choice tbh haha. Turkish weddings are planned by the parents of the soon-to-be married couple so it’d just be some huge venue. But since the question isn’t about that but about what I would want: I actually really like the thought of a beach wedding in a tropical country!

6) Who is this said character?

Ugh I just really am not sure bc I love lots of anime boiz but like he makes me feel even more than most other characters so safest choice: Iwaizumi Hajime I guess. x)

EDIT: ye it's Oikawa insTEAD LIKE I SAID LMAO

7) If you could turn into an animal, which animal would you be?

A cheetah. Even though I’m the least athletic person you’ll ever know, I’ve always been good at sprinting for some reason and I feel on top of the world when I do. I just wish I had more stamina. A cheetah has all that I suppose. They also move so graciously like damn. I wish my every step was the epitome of grace lmao.

8) What’s your favorite of all time dessert?

HOW CAN YOU ASK ME THAT EXPECTING TO HEAR A STRAIGHT ANSWER AAAAHHHHH ;-; there’s like two kinds of dessert that are essentially the same thing but two different fruits. They are Turkish desserts that are roasted with loads of sugar poured on them - quince or pumpkin. But I also cannot decide between those and tiramisu...

9) What’s your ideal date [friend or couple]?

Hmmm... Going to an amusement park. :) You’d get to enjoy the person’s presence and get to know them while waiting in the queue and while having lunch and dinner there and make some nice memories on the rides as well!

10) What would you do if you were given a chance to relive your current life?

I’d tell my mom to ignore that dumbass kindergartner who told her to teach me German instead of Turkish (which has resulted in me not being completely fluent in Turkish), would put more effort into my studies and practicing the trumpet because I could be so much better if I just tried a bit harder...

I tag @cmllnc @vventure @cosmic-goddess-leo @haikoo @the-black-birb @soft-haikyuu @allywritesimagines @for-ests @maple0bwawe to answer the following questions:

1. Do you play an instrument/instruments? If yes, which one(s)? If no, would you like to learn how to play one (which one?)?

2. What are your favourite music genres? (If you do play an instrument/instruments and you play different stuff from what you would usually listen to, which genres would those be in comparison?)

3. What is your favourite movie of all time?

4. What is your most prized possession and why?

5. What does your favourite outfit consist of?

6. What is your preferred genre to read about (whether it be novels or fanfiction, you decide!)?

7. Would you rather have your favourite character be transported into your world or have yourself we swept into that character’s world?

8. Who is that character?

9. What is your favourite pastime when you’re looking to do something with your friends?

10. What is your favourite cuisine?

[jamaisjoons]

(1/) The overall theme of literal ownership, him seeing her as beneath him ("simple succubus" vs King), and him repeatedly thinking things like "You’re nothing more than a plaything" about the reader, even if he's trying to talk himself out of his feelings, doesn't exactly come across as healthy, normal, or not abusive/possessive. Also, how he first binds her to him (manipulating her during sex when she doesn't understand his meaning) + calling her a whore and "a hole for me to use" in a fight,

Okay, I can see where some of your points are coming from but at the same time, I don’t really feel like they apply to my story in particular? This is pretty long so it’s under a read more!

“The overall theme of literal ownership” + “Also, how he first binds her to him (manipulating her during sex when she doesn’t understand his meaning)”

Technically, he does own her because she’s bound to him - this point is very clear. However, it’s also clear through the entire two parts, that she’s consenting to being owned by him. Yes, he binds her during sex, however, after that part (still in part one):

“Am I your captive?” you ask, your voice soft and low.

“You are bound to me.” Comes his reply, his gaze resting on your throat. Then, his eyes flick to yours. They’re guarded, his visage just as stoic and unreadable. “However, if you want to leave I cannot and will not stop you. You can take the collar off whenever you wish and break the binding. You can leave if you want…” (there’s more but for the sake of the length of this answer, I’ve cut it). 

Here, in this scene, she asks him if she’s his prisoner and Namjoon states that yes, she is bound to him, however - she can leave if she wants. He makes that very clear. So yes, while he does, in fact, own her, it’s not like she doesn’t have free will. If she wants to leave, she can and will (Spoiler: she does at the end of part 2). There’s no real contract to being ‘bound’ just that he has ownership of her and as a result, she belongs to him. That doesn’t mean she has to do anything she doesn’t want to and she definitely doesn’t have to obey him completely. In fact, she often takes liberties with him, such as walking into his meeting and asking him to join her for a walk. If he had real ownership of her or if she really was a slave with no choice, she wouldn’t be able to do that. She’d actually fear doing that - but she does, because she knows she’s not ‘owned’ by him in the sense of slavery/abuse - more in the BDSM sense such as Master/Slave (which is where this idea actually does come from).

“Him seeing her as beneath him (“simple succubus” vs King)”

Well, to be honest, she is beneath him? He is a King, that’s who he is - he rules the Underworld as well as his own Kingdom and as a result, she is below him. That is both their natures/classes in the systematics of this AU. He is the Devil King and she is a simple succubus (Not so much simple considering she has a soul but that’s not what this is about). So in terms of this point, I can’t argue with it because yeah that’s what he sees her as but that’s also what they’re roles in the AU are. 

“Him repeatedly thinking things like “You’re nothing more than a plaything” about the reader, even if he’s trying to talk himself out of his feelings, doesn’t exactly come across as healthy, normal, or not abusive/possessive”

In terms of this, firstly: Namjoon is possessive. That is a very clear warning - he’s possessive and jealous because like I’ve mentioned, she’s bound to him (completely consensually). However, him thinking those things aren’t more his actual thoughts or him seeing her that way. It’s more an internal conflict of him trying to convince himself that he doesn’t love her and he doesn’t have feelings for her and using ‘oh she’s just a plaything’ as an excuse. It’s possessive yeah and there are clear warnings, but to me, it’s not abusive. It’s not abusive because he doesn’t actually think those things, they’re more excuses. ‘Oh I can’t love her she means nothing’, ‘Oh I can’t feel these things, she’s just a plaything’. While those are his feelings at the start, they slowly change over time, because he does start seeing her as someone he loves. You only mention plaything but you don’t mention when he refers to her as ‘his Queen’ or that he wants her to raise his children, all internally - which are his true feelings. While she’s under him, he does see her as an equal and that terrifies him. Because he’s the demon of pride and power and he sees these emotions as a weakness - and he doesn’t like feeling weak and that hurts his pride. (You can see where I’m going with this hopefully.)

“Calling her a whore and “a hole for me to use” in a fight +  and on top of it all, she defends/makes excuses for him in her head. 

This scene, this is the ONE time he does verbalise those thoughts and feelings - but once again, I’ve made it clear he does it in a bid to hurt her.

In a bid to hurt you, the way he was hurting, “I could never love you. Did you forget that you’re nothing more than my plaything? A hole for me to use and fill whenever I want and a soul for me to feast on. A little succubus whore. That is all you are. I could easily replace you,” Namjoon hisses harshly.

You know he’s the Devil of Pride. You know it’s his arrogance that is making him say the words and yet, you’re still left reeling from the harshness of his words. You stare at him wide-eyed. Whore. It’s been a long time since he’s called you that - in fact, he very rarely even uses it when he’s fucking you now. You can’t help but flinch from the harshness of his tone before a sob slips through your lips.

He doesn’t actually feel/think those things, he’s just saying them to hurt her. Is that correct? Absolutely not. But I’m sorry to say that people are less than perfect and I’m not going to sit here and write characters that are perfect, who do everything right. What he did was wrong, yes and he paid the price. She left. She broke the bond she had with him and she left. If that was a real slavery/abuse she wouldn’t have been so easily able to do that. More than that, she doesn’t make excuses for him. She knows he’s speaking out of wounded pride and she knows he loves her - but she also acknowledges what he did/said was wrong and as a result, she stops consenting and leaves. 

Does any of that seem healthy or normal to you? If your friend came up to you and said “Yeah, he called me a whore and said I’m nothing more than a hole for him to use” would you be like “Yeah that sounds fine”?“

This point is so far removed from what the AU is actually about. The only times he’s called her anything derogatory is during sex - and again, I’ve put those warnings down. In the same excerpt as from above, she very clearly mentions he only calls her that during sex - where degradation is part of their scenes - and that even then, it’s been a long time since he’s called her that. Even during sex. And again, she doesn’t make excuses for him. She sees what he’s done is wrong and as a result, she breaks their bond. She stops consenting and she leaves him. At no point here, in their relationship, is he abusive towards her. It’s all consenting until he hurts her, and as a result, she walks away.

If this were meant as a yandere/slavery story then whatever (though you should’ve put warnings that it depicts an abusive/unhealthy relationship) but you’re saying you’re not even meaning to write him like that

Again, if this was one of those stories, I would have put a warning on them. However, it isn’t. Nevertheless, it is a Demon AU - and demons aren’t all that nice. They’re dark, they’re demonic and usually, they’re pretty bad. This is an AU that talks about death, and has dark themes and as a result, it’s not going to be all sunshine and rainbows. Namjoon does bad things, he does demonic things - because that is who he is in this AU. He is a Demon King and that is all he knows. In my eyes, I haven’t written Namjoon at all the way you’ve interpreted him. A lot of your corners are taken out of context from what the actual AU is about - a story about a Demon King slowly falling in love with someone who is lesser than him and being conflicted about those feelings. Also, this is an AU, it’s fanfiction - the characters are never going to be portrayed how BTS themselves are, because even as fans, we don’t really know who BTS are. We see their Persona - the personality that they show us. We’re not their real friends and as honest as they are with us, that still doesn’t mean we know everything about them. But more than that, my characters aren’t BTS themselves. They have their likeness yes, they have some personality traits, yes, but they are not them. They are dramatisations of the boys - with some aspects of their personalities and then traits added on top of that in order to fit the AU/Plotline. 

One final point to end this: I know a lot of Demon AUs/Possessive AUs border onto noncon/dubcon - but I have tried my absolute hardest to portray it as completely consensual. The themes of slavery/abuse, to me, absolutely do not come through. However, since it’s my story, I figured that I may be partially blind to that and as a result, I asked @honeymoonjin, @hobisgorgeousass, @ddaenggtan and @devotedpark to read through and tell me if they agreed with you - and they most certainly didn’t. They even assured me that nothing came off as noncon/dubcon and that for a Demon AU, it’s actually pretty consensual and that everything that was done/said makes sense for what the AU is.

This has gotten excessively long, but I felt like I needed to address it in full. I hope this clarified everything and maybe helped you see things differently. Other than this, there is nothing more that I can do. If you still feel the way you do, you’re entitled to that and you’re allowed to not read/not like it. I won’t be taking the fic down or changing the warnings - because they don’t need it and I will definitely continue writing part III. Feel free to not read it, feel free to unfollow - I can’t control what you do and I, personally, feel like I’ve done everything I need to.

[queengurako]

About Okita Souji’s birthday

According to Okita Family’s Legend, Souji was born during a thunderstorm or a solar eclipse. We always doubt about his birthyear. 1842 or 1844 ? The family register told he was born in summer. It’s the only thing we surely know. If we followed the legend there is actually a solar eclipse during 1842. 

In Shinsengumi Makoto I found this information : 

Family legend has it that Okita was born during either a terrible thunderstorm or during a solar eclipse. And it appears that there was indeed a solar eclipse in June of 1842, the year now most commonly given as his birthyear.

The problem is I found nothing during June of 1842 concerning a solar eclipse. (I had a false joy concerning June 26 because there have been a solar eclipse…and it’s the International Day in Supports of Victimes of Torture…please let me laugh at the irony of Souji the killer born during this day XD but nope it was in 1824 T__T). The only solar eclipse during summer 1842 I found was in July 8 which you can find on wikipedia (Solar eclipse of July 8, 1842 ). You even can find a map : 

In 1844, there was also a partial solar eclipse (June 16) but Japan was never concerned by it (follow this link to have more information and check the map you would see the difference between the previous one ). Moreover in Hakuouki, the creators chose 1842 as Souji’s birthyear. So let’s keep 1842 !

However, I’ve got a doubt about July 22, 1842 (10 July, 1842 in old calendar) because it was a partial lunar eclipse and Japan was touched by it…but Okita’s family register said it was during a solar eclipse. So let’s follow the legend (bcz Soji IS a legend). Even if I don’t exclude this date on my mind. 

Though, I needed an another confirmation about this. Also because Shinsengumi-no-makoto and the “a solar eclipse in June of 1842″ gave me doubt and I have to check the Japanese Lunar Calendar.

Believe me it’s awfuuul ! I tried to understand all the Month table but keep in mind I could do a mistake. Anyway ! In 1842, the six month of lunar calendar was July and began in…7/08 !!

Although I don’t speak Japanese (I can just read hiragana and a little katana), I did some research to see if the solar eclipse is mentionned somewhere. This following page explained that Soji could be born in June 1 of lunar calendar, according to the legend but also the searcher Yoishi Tsuri.[nb :  If someone who speak Japanese could confirme me this information with a good translation…it would help me a lot !!!]

By the way one of my friend told me July 8 of 1842 was a new moon, so a new lunar month…which is fucking badass for Okita to her and I completely agreed ^^

SO ! What can we conclude ? (with my horrible english and I’m very sorry for everyone who tried to read me)

Okita Suoji was born in summer of 1842 or 1844.

The legend told us he was born during a solar eclipse.

A total solar eclipse occured on July 8, 1842. 

Shinsengumi-no-makoto and the Japanese blog explain that Okita Souji was born in June. Precisely on June 1 of the Japanese lunar calendar.

June of the lunar calendar of 1842 began July 8, 1842.

And guess what…? Soraichi gave THAT date of birth for Okita Sougo in Gintama 8D !!

(sorry but I couldn’t resist for this gif)

In conclusion, for historical legend, Hakuouki and Gintama… Okita Souji was born July 8, 1842 : the first day of the sixth month of Tenpou 13.

And his astrological sign is Cancer. 

Now do what you want with these informations :D

. . .

/!\  Keep in mind I could do mistakes even if I did some researchs and checked them. So please if you have others informations (with the Japanese link or others japanese blogs or anything else) or corrections…please share it !  Let’s talk !

Also don’t forget the real birth date of Okita Souji is still unknown. All of this topic is based on deductions from sources. If we know he was born in summer the birthyear was not written in the family register. All of these researchs were done to find if the solar eclipse was a historical fact and to determine Okita’s birthday in Japanese lunar calendar.  It’s also an help for people who want to write fanfictions about Okita, who are curious about him (or even why Sorachi chooses this day for Sougo’s birthday) or who love Souji. From Hakuouki or any fandom where he appears <333</p>

/!\ . . .

If you want to go further @fuckyeahbakumatsu and @fierce-little-miana talked about Soji’s birthday and Soji’s astrological sign in this post :)

Sources : 

- List of Solar eclipses in the 19th century - wikipedia eng. - Okita Soji - wikipedia (eng, fr, jap) - Okita Soji - Shinsengumi no Makoto. - Solar eclipse of July 8, 1842 - wikipedia eng. - Total Solar eclipse of 8 July, 1842 - Moonblink.  - Partial Lunar eclipse of 22 July, 1842 - Moonblink. - Okita Sougo - Gintama wikia. - Japanese Date conversion. - Tsuri Yoishi - amazon japanese page. -  沖田総司の生まれた日(？)

[fandoms-equal-life]

Rewriting Their Stars Once Again - The Greatest Showman Fanfiction

Chapter 7: Family Matters

Originally Posted on Ao3: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13365846/chapters/45440608#workskin

Summary: What will happen when Anne visits Phillip's family home?

Notes:

This took like 3 hours to write. 

I wrote it at work and every time my co worker walked behind me I was worried he was reading it 😂 I don’t even know how I would explain myself. 

Also let me know if the part where Anne visits the Carlyles’ is insensitive or weirdly worded. I might be big mouthed and opinionated, but I am not looking to offend anyone. I am only here to write fanfic to fulfill my lonely heart. 

Also I am sorry I am so inconsistent. It is my goal this month to finish this fic and I am really trying to finish my goals for once! Thank you for the continued support!!❤️

~

The next two months were tough.

Anne was so sick, the morning sickness turned into all day sickness and there was not much food she could keep down. If Anne got out of bed for any other reason but to empty her stomach, it was a good day.

On top of that, her stomach was very large. She knew this should not be a shock to her, but when she sees herself in the mirror, she is still in disbelief. A seamstress came over just to make her custom dresses, and even P.T. used his childhood work as a tailor to make a couple items of clothing for her.

She needed to use the restroom all the time, her feet were getting larger, and her ankles and fingers were swelling. She had to start wearing her wedding ring on a chain around her neck.

The doctors’ visits every 2 weeks were difficult to endure. Dr. Turner would never let her walk in by herself, instead making her a wheelchair. Also, he could only give so much information about what was happening inside her body. Triplets were complicated for the highest paying doctor, let alone one who would see Anne.

But the hardest part of it all was Phillip could not always be there. With the circus struggling, he was swamped with work to make sure it is kept afloat.

Thankfully, she had a big family to fall back on. When Charity alone took her, the trips were fairly easy. Sometimes she had to bring the girls, which were usually filled with endless questions for the doctor, Helen once asking “Will all three of them come out at the same time?”

Charity had to leave the room with them before Dr. Turner could give an answer.

When Lettie brought her, she usually brought Tom along as backup. His loud mouth scared anyone away who might bring them trouble. Tom is so protective, that he stands directly outside the door during the checkups.

The other doctors and nurses tend to stay away on the days Lettie and Tom come along.

Do not even get Anne started about the time P.T., Caroline, and Helen accompanied her. The doctors requested that P.T. never step foot in their office again.

Even with all of this going on, Anne and Phillip were very excited. They wanted to grow their family, but, the looming danger of the end of the pregnancy and the delivery still loomed over the couple.

Anne and Phillip kept themselves distracted from this fact. They each joined the bet on which sex would outnumber the other (Anne thinks there will be more boys, while Phillip bet on more girls), Phillip and P.T. rearranged the furniture in the apartment to fit the three cradles, and Anne organized the gifts they were still receiving every day. The list of baby names becomes longer as the pregnancy becomes shorter. Anne likes family and classic names, but Phillip wants whole new names for his kids. Their family at the circus has new names suggestions every day, but only a few make it onto the real list, especially after Tom insisted that naming one of the potential boys after his horse in the show would be a great idea.

One night, when Anne and Phillip were sitting in their apartment, she asked why he was not in favor for family names.

“After that night at the theater, I have no desire to be associated with them anymore. The Carlyle name is something I wish I could rid myself of. I know they are going to take my last name, but other than that, I want something new.” Phillip explains with a soft smile. “I know that you never knew your mom and dad, but my family is not anything to be proud of.”

“Would you reconnect with your family if they came to you?” Anne asked.

“Maybe my little brother Daniel, but I’m not sure. Before I left and was disowned, he had rejected our father. I was the first born with all the privileges, and Daniel resented father for that. Last I heard that had all changed after he took my place as prize son with the inheritance. I assume he took my father’s side along with mother and the rest of my extended family, which is most likely why he did not attend our wedding.” Phillip told her.

Anne looked at him with soft, apologetic eyes. Anne knew that Daniel missing the wedding hurt Phillip. She thinks Phillip hoped for them to reconnect, that he could introduce Daniel to his new family and to the love of his life.

“But that is all behind me. Now I have a big and loving family and three little ones on the way.” Phillip says, kissing her protruding stomach. “Are you ready for bed?” he asks.

“Almost. You go get ready first then you can help me and my added baggage” she replied, pointing to her stomach.

He laughed and nodded, then walked into their bedroom, Anne got up to write a letter to their doorman to call a carriage for her as soon as Phillip walked out the door. She had a plan.

The carriage dropped Anne off at one of the largest houses she had ever seen.

It was beautiful.

The Carlyle house was painted all white, with big pillars holding up what Anne could only guess was 3 stories. They had big windows that would let plenty of natural light in, and Anne could see through the windows how ornate the inside looked. The lawn was well manicured, with flower bushes lining the front and big looming trees growing on the outside of the house, almost like a wall in between the other houses. She noticed that while it was stunning, that was negated by the cold atmosphere that seemed to surround the house.

As Anne was observing the house, she noticed one of workers in the lawn trimming the bushes. It was obvious that he was overworked and sunburnt, and most importantly:

He looked like her.

This brought her back to the reality of the situation. She was not home with her loving husband, or surrounded by her other oddities at the circus, she was standing in front of a wealthy white family’s home who, in another life, may have worked her as hard as the man she is looking at.

At this, she held herself as tall as the three children she was carrying would let her, put her hands clasped in front of her, and walked to the door.

The man in the lawn subtly glanced at her, not making any eye contact, as he probably does with all guests, until he noticed that Anne was not one of the Carlyle’s usual guests. He went to go help her up to the door, but she denied his help politely.

She would not be seen as weak. She was a woman on a mission, pregnant with three children or not.

Anne walked up to the door and knocked. A woman dressed in a maid’s uniform answered the door almost immediately. She also did not make eye contact with Anne when she first opened the door, but when the maid realized the difference between the color of Anne’s skin than the usual guest, she looked up in shock.

The maid was about to step out and close the door when Anne interjected “I am here to see Daniel Carlyle. It is urgent matter.”

The woman at the door glanced down at Anne’s pregnant stomach then back up at her. “Ms. I am sorry for any inconveniences Master Carlyle may have caused you, but you must leave immediately...”

Anne was about to put up a fight when she heard someone ask, “Mary who is at the door and why have you not let them in?”

Anne pushed pass the maid and stood in the doorway of the mansion in front of the person who was speaking.

Anne knew immediately it was Daniel.

His hair was a little lighter than Phillip’s and his face was not as clean cut. He was maybe a little shorter than Phillip, and a little leaner too. But his eyes were almost exactly the same, except for the fact they were cold and hard, while Phillip’s were warm and inviting.

Similar to how Phillip’s were when he first joined the circus.

Daniel stared back at her. Anne wondered if he knew who she was. But word travels fast through the wealthy people of New York; therefore, Anne realizes that the whole family must know of the pregnancy.

Anne sticks out her hand to Daniel. “Hello Mr. Carlyle. As you probably know, my name is Anne Wheeler and I am here to talk about your older brother.” Anne begins when they hear the footsteps of woman shoes coming towards them.

Daniel lunges at Anne and grabs her hand. “We must get you away from the door and away from mother. Mary close the door and tell her it was just the lawn man giving you an update about his work.”

Daniel shuffles her down a hall in the opposite direction, quickly pushing themselves into a spare bedroom, just as Anne heard what she assumes is Mrs. Carlyle asking what had happened at the door.

After he closed the door quietly, he turned around to face her. Anne had prepared a speech for Daniel. She had planned it to be polite and not so straightforward, so she could plant the seed in his head that his brother missed him.

“Hello, Mr. Carlyle. As you already know, I’m -” Anne began.

Daniel interrupted her. “I know who you are! You are one of the crazy people who brainwashed my brother to think it is okay to be disowned by his family. I used to doubt my father’s decision to take away his inheritance, but you, standing here carrying what I can only assume is his bastard child, I see now that he was correct. Whatever you came here for, money, help, protection, the Carlyle family will not give it to you or him. You need to leave this place immediately, the only reason I brought you into this room was to save you from mother’s wrath, as I am a gentleman. Do not ever come back, or else you will face even worse than me.”

Daniel looked pleased with himself, like he really thought that he put Anne in her place.

Anne does not know what came over her next, maybe rage at this man, love for her husband and her unborn children, or the hormones from pregnancy, but instead of leaving to cause less trouble, she yelled back,

“I did not sneak here without my husband’s knowledge, catch a rickety carriage while pregnant, and swallow my pride to visit the family that insulted Phillip and myself on what was supposed to be a happy night so I could ask for money or protection. I woke up and managed to get out of bed by myself to visit you, Daniel Carlyle, because my husband, your big brother, misses you to the point I think a part of his heart is missing.”

Daniel tries to interrupt her again, but Anne continues, “Phillip, the big brother that would comfort you after nightmares because your father and mother wouldn’t. The one who snuck you fantasy books while your teacher forced you to read nonfiction. The one who took a punch to the face after you stole from the biggest kid on your block, and, most importantly, the big brother that still loves you even though you obviously think so low of him.”

“I came here to tell you that right now, your big brother needs you. He is running a business all by himself while also having to worry about me and the three children I am carrying, and whether or not we will make it through the labor. So, Mr. Carlyle, I did not show up here today to ask for anything monetary, I traveled here because I thought my husband could benefit from a relationship with his brother, but I was obviously wrong.”

At that, she turned out and stormed out. Anne would be damned if she would wait for Daniel to check the hallways for a “safe” passage way for her. She did not mean to tell him the details of their life, but once she started talking, she could not stop. Today made her realize that the only place she is really safe is in the red and white striped tents.

Anne started seeing white around the corner of her eyes and her ears were ringing. She thought it was the rage, but after she walked out of the mansion, she felt herself becoming weak. All of the sudden her vision went black and she felt herself starting to fall. The last thing she heard was a male voice shouting “ANNE!”

Chapters 1 ~ 2 ~ 3 ~ 4 ~ 5 ~ 6 ~ 8 ~ 9 ~ 10 ~ 11

[shewolfofficial]

Dad!Levi x Mom!Reader ~ Run Pt. 2

Warning: Cursing, Slight Angst at the end

Summary: You spend a few days with Levi and your friends still in the forest, one night you recieve news that the Scouts were no longer criminals

A/N: If there's any grammar mistakes please excuse them, I've started to write fanfiction after midnight and I become tired when I'm reading over it for mistakes

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

You woke up to birds chirping and quiet chatter from around you, opening your eyes you glanced down to your side where Rose was supposed to be sleeping only to find her not there. Shooting up like a bullet you failed to notice everyone was already awake including your two daughters. "Mommy I'm here don't worry" Rose came out from behind the tree holding a bunch of flowers she picked in her little hand "o-oh I thought you went off by yourself" you chuckled dryly to your young child who giggled and walked over to Sasha and Connie who were eating a cooked fish. You could see Levi sitting by the small river on a large stone talking to Isabelle, probably bitching about people they don't like since you usually catch them doing it.

"Good morning Y/N" Armin chirped to you as you stretched a little "good morning Armin, mornin' Mikasa" you greeted him and the girl who stood next to him. "You both get enough sleep?" you asked them as they both nodded "what about you? How are you holding up?" Mikasa replied while you shrugged "I'm alright, nothing to worry about here" you snickered as she nodded. "Well looks like someone is finally awake!" a teasing voice came from behind you, immediately knowing who it belonged to you rolled your eyes playfully turning around to face Jean who wore a devious grin "well good morning to you too.... JEAN BOYYYYY!!" you shouted to him before laughing, hearing Armin and Mikasa titter from behind you. "Jean boyy!" Sasha called out from across the little river making you laugh harder. "Oh shut up potato girl" Jean growled before facing you "if you want it that way, fine Y/N this means war" he snickered before appearing next to you and leaning on your shoulder trying to imitate your voice " 'Oh Captain Levi! I am a damsel in distress oh please save me my knight in shining armor! ' "Jean exclaimed gaining Rose's and Isabelle's attention as they watched you both.

Frowning you shot him a glare as a pink blush dusted your cheeks "sorry what was that? I couldn't hear you over the attempts of you trying to impress Mikasa" you snickered as Jean's eye twitched. "Oh I'm sorry! What was that Y/N? I didn't hear you over the fact that you never stop fawning over the Captain!" Jean shot back frowning.

Isabelle nudged Levi's side resulting in him looking to her in confusion, the only response he got was a gesture towards you and Jean trying to embarrass and insult each other. "I've actually never seen this side of mom before... It's strange but funny" Isabelle mutters as she and Levi both watch you and Jean torment each other.

Armin was now clinging onto your arm to try restrain you after Jean said that you pissed yourself on your first expedition out loud. Boy were you furious at him. "YOU SAID YOU WOULD NEVET SPEAK OF IT AGAIN YOU BITCH!" you screeched in horror to the male who laughed at your expression. "Oh well at least we know who won this war right Y/N?" Jean snickered before you sent him a death glare. "You should really stop drawing pictures of Mikasa and leaving them around in the dorm Jean Boy!" you watched his face drop in terror as he paled "fine I give up you win" Jean pouted in disappointment. "Momma bear wins again!" you say proudly as Rose claps excitedly from beside you "great job mommy! Here, have a flower!" Rose smiled as she placed a flower behind your ear. "Thank you sweetie~" you sang to her kissing her forehead.

Rose was a very innocent and kind child, she would always make sure you, Levi and everyone else was happy or she'd try to cheer them up. You could tell she would be a kind young woman when she grows up. Isabelle was quite the daddy's girl, she would be interested in fighting, the Military and topics related to it. She had the personality of her father and wouldn't hesitate to jump into a fight if she wanted.

Getting lost in thought Levi didn't notice you and Rose arriving in front of him until you waved a hand in front of him "Leviii? Helllooo? You there or are you in cloud 9?" you joked hearing Isabelle snicker as Levi's gaze darted up to meet yours. "What?" he asked as you placed your hands on your hips "what's the plan for today cap?" you smirk at him "we're waiting for Hanji to return with news on the MP situation in the capital, we may be closer to not being considered as criminals anymore" Levi says as Rose sat on his knee. "Right..Well thanks for bringing me up to date anyway" you say watching Rose hand a flower to Levi and Isabelle as he bounces her on his knee. "Has... The whole house been destroyed..?" Levi asks quietly looking at you, sighing you nod "currently we're homeless, quite literally since we are in a forest" you snicker at your own joke as Levi playfully rolls his eyes.

"I'll sort the housing situation out with Historia once we get her and Eren back" Levi says as you shake your head. "Nope you can leave that to me mister! You'll probably threaten her or something" you smile to Levi who clicks his tongue "probably... Fine.. You do it then" he says knowing you won't give up until he agrees.

// Time Skip - 4 hours later \\

You watched the sunset over the hill through a gap in the trees, E/C orbs watching the blazing mass of fire and heat slowly disappear over the hills, hearing rustling of grass come up from behind you-you were soon joined by Levi who sat next to you in silence. A few minutes passed and Levi broke the silence "Sasha wants to bring you hunting for food for dinner, you know, since it's animals and all that shit so.." Levi spoke as you nodded your head laying back on the grass lookin up to the darkening sky starting to be speckled with stars. "I'll go with her in a minute.. I'm just watching the view you know?" you reply as Levi nods looking over your features, sighing he tore his silver orbs off you "I'm sorry I brought you and the kids into this mess... You three were doing just fine" he mumbles in guilt, shooting up you look at him. "Don't dare blame yourself for us being dragged into this shit, it's not your fault, it's more of my fault since I disgarded the thought of all scouts being labelled as wanted, that included the ones who retired. It's my fault not yours so don't beat yourself up over it" you say as your mother tone kicks in. Levi shakes his head running a hand through his dark hair "If Hanji wasn't there when those pigs had you at gunpoint you and the girls would be dead, I should have fucking been there to protect you three like a good father and husband" he bites his lip as I wrap my arms around him. "Nonono Levi what did I say about beating yourself up over it? What are you talking about? You're a brilliant father! The girls love and admire you! Don't forget you're an amazing husband, you've protected us and supported us more than I can count" you exclaim to him. Holding Levi in your embrace as you rocked gently back and forward.

"Now I'm going to go hunting with Sasha and we're going to get everyone dinner for tonight, if I come back and you're still beating yourself up over it you'll have to listen to me rant about how great of a father and husband you are for god knows how long, ya hear me?" you couldn’t help the smile that tugged on your lips as you pulled you both up, resting both your hands on his shoulders. "Let momma bear take care of daddy bear and the cubs for tonight" you giggle as Levi smiles a little before leaning in and kissing your lips, kissing back you nip his lower lip before pulling away. "Now come on soldier boy, let's go back to the others" you say holding his hand and dragging him back to the others.

// Time Skip - After Dinner \\

You and Sasha managed to score a deer and hauled it back to camp where you gained some surprised faces. "Mom is that one of Santa's reindeers!? Did you kill one" Rose exclaims on the verge if tears thinking you killed Rudolf or something. "No she didn't Rose, Santa's reindeers live In the North Pole remember?" Levi instantly soothes the young girl as she clings to him.

The deer actually tasted really nice and Rose even ate it. Leaving everyone with full stomachs and tired minds, Armin and the others began going to bed. "Rose you can stay with me tonight up in the tree yeah?" Isabelle offered as Rose nodded excitedly to sleep in the tree with her big sister.

Gaining some remaining heat from the campfire you heard the light snores from all around you, presuming everyone was asleep you stayed up getting as much heat from the dying flames. That didn't last long until arms sneakily wrapped around your waist as you felt someone digging their head into the crook of your neck, catching a glimpse of Levi's raven hair you calmed down as he cuddled into you. You could hear Levi let out a low growl from behind you "what was that you were saying earlier? 'Let momma bear take care of daddy bear and the cubs for tonight'? Looks like you already done your part now why don't we switch roles... Let me take care of you tonight" Levi whispers before biting on your neck making you squeak. Standing up Levi pulled you up before dragging you a little bit away from the camp. "Levi where are we going?" you ask as he leads the way "tch.. Don't worry" was all he responded with.

// Next Day \\

You sat at the trunk of a tree watching Sasha and Connie talk to your daughters, Isabelle seemed to have a blush on her cheeks which made you snicker seeing how she formed a crush on Connie. Levi was out collecting sticks and twigs incase you needed to start a fire with Mikasa and Jean. Armin fishing in the river and you just sat there chilling, not really in the mood since you were sore from last night so you didn't fancy probably embarrassing yourself in front of everyone.

Noticing figures approaching in the distance made you quirk an eyebrow soon recognising them as Levi, Mikasa and Jean coming back with firewood you could hear Levi order them to drop it in a pile where the last camp-fire was situated.

Soon enough the darkness of night begun to creep up and arrive that signalling dinner time, luckily you managed to catch a rabbit but immediately got attached to the white fluffy animal and quickly be-friended it.

Now resulting in you holding the litte creature to your chest as everyone stared at you like a hungy pack of wolves. "Y/N hand over the rabbit" Jean said reaching for it, scurrying backwards your back his against the tree. "Cone on Y/N it'll be quick and easy, it won't feel a thing" Connie tries as you shake your head pouting. Levi walked past them giving you a fed up expression "Y/N give it." he said squinting his eyes down to you holding out his hand. Wrapping the small ball of fluff in your arms protectively you refuse Levi which makes him frown at you. "Y/N it won't feel a thing, just hand it over" Levi attempted once more before you sighed and gently passed the small bunny to Levi, holding it by the stomach with one hand he turned his back to you. A few seconds later you heard a firm snap making you flinch as the rabbit dangled from Levi's grip on it's ears.

You literally had to force yourself to eat a part of the cooked rabbit which made you gag, rabbits had been your favourite animal since you were young. Managing to befriend one then have it immediately die a few minutes later upset you. Once you finished eating your friend you laid against a tree outside the small circle of people eating your little friend. Not long after Hanji appeared with Moblit with news on the whole government issue. The fake king had been exposed and the scouts were no longer criminals. Watching everyone jump and shout for joy including your two daughters, sitting in the background watching them celebrate you knew since the fake king has been exposed, the mission to retake Wall Maria will be happening once everyone regroups meaning you will have to leave Levi for another while without seeing him.

That could last god knows how long, and it's Wall Maria for bloody sake! The place is full of titans! This made you feel even more sick to the bottom of your stomach with worry about your husband and friends.

You had to admit, not seeing Levi for a few weeks upset you, getting to be reunited with him for under a week made you happy but the thought of having him leave again broke you since there's a chance he might not come back one day.

[lightfromtheshadows]

I saw a truly horrible post in the M*lec tag today and when I finally had time to do a little digging into their archive, I realized that it was even worse than the original post suggested. 

Some of their posts (just within the last few months) have included statements like: 

“[Gays] are [a] movement against heterosexuals. I mean we left the gays now every TV show has 3.5 hays and is against normal heterosexism.”

“Two of my fav characters were turned into bisexuals. I am oppressed.”

“People don’t want the gay character whether religious reasons, anti gay culture or live in a country with anti gay laws...it is within their rights to keep their morals.”

“There are literally thousands of good gay fanfiction and fanart on tumblr alone, you have too much gay rep.”

“Nah, Alec realized his mistake and is 100 percent straight. He converted at pray the gay camp. [...] He loves Cl*ry Fr*y, he adores her, and decided being straight was a better option when M*gnus got 4 STDs. Gays can be straight.“

“You think its not pissing on actual homophobia by comparing shipping to the years of oppression and hatred that was so ingrained in human culture that every group went through it.”

“Imagine being such a sick twisted little fairy that you blame hets, a normal sexual orientation, for what happened when it was fucking culture. Imagine being this ignorant, stupid, idiotic and dimwitted over history Can’t relate. lmao.”

"Conversion therapy is help for you losers so you don't become homoelitist perverts."

"I want every stupid gay shipper to go for conversion therapy so they can get a good personality." 

"I will encourage others to speak up against the gay agenda."

"My hatred will get [gay] rights revoked."

"I want to be Trump[,] maybe then I can gas the Jews and put the gays in concentration camps. lmao."

This is apparently what certain shippers - certain people - stand for and honestly, I’m so disgusted I feel like I could puke. I immediately reported the user, writing up a long review of examples and explaining how this violates the Tumblr’s Community Guidelines concerning Malicious Speech, particularly the last five instances. Their guidelines specifically read: 

Don't encourage violence or hatred. Don’t make violent threats or statements that incite violence, including threatening or promoting terrorism. Especially don’t do so on the basis of things like race, ethnic origin, religion, disability, gender, gender identity, age, veteran status, or sexual orientation.

Hopefully @staff actually does something about this because this kind of behavior should not be acceptable and trying to dismantle their hateful discourse on a user-to-user basis has clearly not worked in the past. It’s time for them to step up and handle the situation.