#i’m sorry i am so tired feel free to ignore this post and these tags

[antaripirate]

bro took “how do you know when The Sarows is coming?” to a whole new level

(this is how you know that The Sarows is coming)

(is coming, is coming, is coming aboard)

[dietersearring]

God, do you forgive me?

paring: Dieter Bravo x f!reader.

rating: explicit. minors dni.

tags: some smut, soft!dieter, no use of y/n, oral (f receiving), established relationship, religious imagery? no description of reader, except they're afab. if I missed something please kindly lmk.

a/n: finally found some free time to do this! my very first fic. at least, the first one ever posted. Hope you enjoy it! I had a great time writing it, and it's even better because I love the idea of a writing challenge, so thank you to the great @iamasaddie. Please, keep in mind it's my first time doing this, and that English isn't my first language, so if you find any grammatical errors let's just [sliding a dollar bill across the table] ignore them.

word count: 2.1k

Killing the engine of his car, Dieter allows himself a moment to breathe out a sigh, making sure he gets rid of any remaining stress flooding his bloodstream. Wrap up parties maybe were his thing in a previous and crazier life, but not anymore, not since his very long recovery.

He gets out of the car with a grunt, straightening his jacket and giving the motel sign a look before heading in, sneaking a hand into his back pocket to reach for his wallet, taking out some cash and handing it out to the receptionist after a quick smile. it was easier this way, leaving no trace behind, where not even the lost souls could find him. at least, that was what was agreed with the owners a little more than a year ago when he had his agent find the place.

Privacy, that was all he needed.

“Good evening, sir. She’s already waiting for you in the room” the young woman smiles at him and he nods in return, giving her a quick thank you after she hands him the keys, before heading back out to the rooms, the chill air hitting his face once he found himself outside.

He walks quickly, getting more desperate by the second, eager to get rid of this clothes, the smell, the persona he kept on putting every time he had to face the world, his work, his life, where everyone asked him over and over again 'how’s everything going?' like they couldn’t wait for the moment he slipped up once again, like they couldn’t wait for the moment they found him passed out in one of the set bathrooms like it was just another tuesday.

He wasn’t like that anymore. It had been a long time since he had been like that.

He opens the door with a quick and easy turn of the key and sighs loudly, letting his bag fall on his side and quickly toeing his boots off. He can hear the low hum of the water falling from the shower, so he starts to lazily undress himself, letting the pieces of clothing fall on a heap on the floor. Heading for the bathroom, something on the bed catches the corner of his eye and he can’t help but smile to himself, his chest filling with anticipation as he opens the door to the bathroom and walks in.

“Took you long enough” he hears a voice saying.

Oh. Oh, that voice, the one that could save him from everything.

“I’m sorry. you know how wrap-ups are" he mumbles, kicking off his underwear and then, when he looks in the direction of the small shower, you are already looking at him, peeking from behind the curtain with a small smile. He feels a warm sensation spreading all over his body, burning.

Oh, God.

"I know" your smile grows wider, opening the curtain and moving to the side when his broad frame walks in.

Dieter certainly knows he looks tired, but there’s a grin creeping up the corners of his lips and he has a feeling that you know everything is better now that he is right in front of you.

"Hey” you say, lifting your hands to cup both his cheeks. You feel him relax against your touch “I’m glad you’re here.”

“I am glad I’m here, too” he replies, grabbing gently your wrists and turning his head to the side to leave a soft kiss on the palm of your hand.

He slowly starts kissing all the way to your forearm and, short after, he’s pulling you in, wrapping both of his arms around you before searching for your lips, pressing his own on top of them. You moan in surprise and he smiles over you.

Most of the time, when he had you by his side, he felt like the world was crumbling away from him, causing him to lose all the stability he had managed to build in his little mental palace. What was there in you that managed to break through every wall neatly built around him? What was there about you that made him want to be a better man, that made him want to give life another chance?

You break the kiss to gasp at the feeling of his hands sneaking between your legs and his heart starts pounding hard against his ribcage. He thinks that if he dies there, he would go as a happy man. You bury your face on the crook of his neck and he starts:

"I saw you already started without me. Are you going to wear that number on the bed still?” he chuckles, one of his fingers circling over your clit while his other hand keeps you standing, firmly wrapped around your waist “I would love to see you in it”

“I— fuck— I wanted to surprise you” you manage to say, your breath catching on your throat “You’ve worked so, so hard lately”

He nods, his smile growing wider on his face.

Were you an angel who had been sent from heaven to save him? Religion had never been his thing, certainly not after seeing how fucked up the industry worked, but he couldn't find a more logical explanation for how a being like you existed in the same world as he did. He couldn't find a more sensible explanation to understand how a smile could throw his entire façade of superstar away, how two bodies fit together so perfectly when making love. Were you sculpted by a higher being to send you to him? Was this how Adam had felt when Eve first appeared in the Garden?

"That’s so sweet, baby” and he means it, that’s why he sneaks one digit inside you at the praise, collecting your slick before going back to the stimulation in your bundle of nerves “Should we go to bed, then?” he asks, pressing his lips to the side of your jaw.

You’re not more than a puddle of arousal in his arms, so you only nod and let him help you dry yourself and walk you to the bed after he disappears on the bathroom again, insisting on getting himself clean, for you, for your sake, because he insists on leaving every trace of work and the real world behind the doors of your room.

For you, he would do anything for you.

He showers quickly, and when he comes out of the bathroom with a towel around his waist, he stops in his tracks when he founds you sitting at the edge of the bed, feeling drunk on the sight of the pieces of lingerie hugging perfectly the curves of your body. You smile again and then he notices the slight blush over your cheekbones.

“Do you like it?” you ask.

You dare to ask.

Dieter wanted to scream, not knowing how to shake the pressure he felt in his chest and the tingle in his stomach when you smiled at him like that. There was a time in his life when he was known to be flirtatious with many women, but when it came to you, he felt like a teenager having his first crush, feeling like no words would ever be enough to praise the beauty that was sitting right in front of him.

With his silence, you stand up and walk in his direction, causing gravity and oxygen to leave the room once more, Dieter not realizing that he had begun to hold his breath until your fingers rested on his chest, sliding your nails over his skin until reaching the hem of the towel on his waist. There, he sighs in an attempt to calm his nerves. Or his arousal, he is still unsure on what he was feeling.

"You’re…” he begins, his breath shaky.

“Yes?” you look at him, curious, your eyes full of love. He wonders if you know how attractive you are or if it’s just a natural thing you do.

“You’re…” he does it again, clearing his throat in an attempt to clear his mind of the filth that flooded it, sending all his blood down his body “You’re gorgeous"

You chuckle and shake your head, noticing how his eyes follow every movement “Thank you, baby” you finish, moving forward to kiss him again. This time, the kiss feels hungry, eager, and Dieter starts walking, one step at a time until the back on your knees hit the edge of the bed, making you fall over it with him on top.

“You’re so fucking beautiful…” he breathes out between kisses, pressing his wet lips on your jaw, your pulse, your collarbones, “I don’t know what I did to deserve you.” he confesses, shaking his head almost defeated and he takes your bra out of his way, kissing around one of your breasts, his hand giving attention to the other.

Truth is, it was a thought he had way too much times when he had you around. If there was no God, who had sent you? Who had made you just too perfectly for him? Would that God ever forgive him for the things he had done in order to cope with his work?

Would you?

Your moans start filling the room quickly, one of your hands burying between his wet curls, unconsciously trying to push him downwards, where you most needed his attention.

“Dieter… baby, please…” you manage to speak, your chest going up and down in quick breaths. He could tear you apart with only a few kisses and you would let him every time.

“I got you, honey. I’ll give you anything you ask from me” he nodded, his eyes darkening at the sight of your ruined face. He quickly continues and kisses his way down your body until he finds himself buried between your legs. It was ironic, really. You were, after all, his guardian angel and he was there to praise you, to adore you like a goddess that he would give his life away for.

“I got you” he repeats in a whisper, more to himself than anything, placing one of your legs over his shoulder before pressing wet kisses on the inside of your thighs until he reaches your mound, groaning when he notices the soft fabric has a darker, wet spot in it.

"Please…” you almost cry out, squirming slightly between his arms.

He kisses over the fabric and pulls the lace to the side, revealing your sex to him. The warm feeling spreads rapidly inside his body, like a wildfire consuming everything in its way to claim it as its own. He looks at you from between your legs and finds that you’re eyes are already on him.

"I love you"

It’s barely audible, barely a whisper, but you feel it in the deepest parts of your soul.

Before you can say it back, though, he’s latching onto you like a starved man, like his thirst has been satiated after years of yearning, after years of begging. Your high pitched moans instantly fill the room again, or so he thinks, after all, all he needs is to feel them echoing inside his chest. Those were all the praise he needed, feeling like he was touching heaven knowing the effect he was having on you. He prayed that it would be like this for the rest of his life, but most of all, he prayed that what he was experiencing was real. Even if he didn't understand it, even if he wasn't sure he deserved it.

"Dieter, I—... I’m going to, oh, fuck—” you can’t finish your sentence, your nails digging into his scalp and pushing him against your core.

The feeling of his lips wrapping around you and sucking, claiming you as his, becomes almost unbearable when he pushes two of digits inside and curls them, searching for the sweet spots that make you see the stars. The warmth on your belly spreads all over your body when the coil snaps and you climax, hearing him groaning in the distance, clearly satisfied. He helps you ride your orgasm and, when you come down and the ringing in your ears feels further away, you feel him caressing your belly with the tips of his fingers, his other’s slipping out from the deepest of you that he could reach like that. That’s what makes you open your eyes again, finding him already looking at you, a dumb smile adorning his messy face, his mustache wet and lips puffy and red.

You smile back and his heart flutters inside his chest.

Did he deserve to have you in such a vulnerable state? What had he done in past lives to be rewarded in such a way? To have you like this, he would do everything all over again.

[brandileigh2003]

@flashfictionfridayofficial

Feel free to give me kudos or comments on AO3 too

Fandom: marauders (harry potter). Characters: remus lupin, Lily Evans. Wc: 997

CW: (+ other things that would be in tags)

talk of injuries, mental illness. Remus is trans. Post-prank. Pre-wolfstar relationship. Lily & Remus friendship

***************

“Remus?” Lily whispered, shaking his shoulder lightly. 

Remus sat up with a gasp. “Hm?”

“Why aren’t you in your room? It’s close to… Your time of the month. You have to be hurting sleeping here,” Lily sat down beside him, eyes furrowed in concern. “Were you crying, love?” 

“Um. I just. I can’t be around him,” Remus replied. He tried to ignore the crying question as well as the one about pain. Because the truth was, Remus hurt so badly. Every single joint was like it was on fire, and his stomach hurt because not only did the universe see fit to have him be turned into a werewolf before his fifth birthday, it had him born into the wrong body, and lately his period seemed to want to line up with the moons. Remus wanted to scream, or punch something. Better yet, punch Lyall. He didn’t think that Remus fully understood what it meant to take testosterone potions and permanently change his body. 

Lily’s compassionate voice broke him down and he finally told her everything about the month prior, of Sirius betraying one of his biggest secrets. He was honestly surprised that Snape hadn’t told her yet, but he supposed since the mudblood incident, she hadn’t given him the time of day. Which; good for her. He had hated seeing her in pain watching her oldest friend get in deeper with the other dark Slytherins, and although he didn’t want her to be in pain, being close to him would only get worse as the war loomed closer. 

“That’s… Oh Merlin, Remus. I am so sorry,” she said, wrapping her arms around him and rubbing his back gently.

He was crying again, and he hated himself, more than ever. He felt tired and weak, physically, mentally, emotionally. Plus  any other way that one can just feel ready to just lay down and not really care if they ever got back up. 

He wiped his face but winced at the still tender wounds on his face. Which was yet another thing that he would always have to carry from that night. The wolf was more angry than ever when he thought that he would finally have prey, not be hungry for once, and took it out more than usual on Remus. His hip still wasn’t right, and his face now was bisected with what would certainly turn into scars. 

“I was going to finally tell him, Lily. How is that for life just not letting me have anything good,” Remus finally said. Lily was one of the only people that he had confided about his feelings for Sirius. And what made it all so much worse is that Remus had been nearly certain that Sirius also had feelings for him too. But Remus should have known that he shouldn’t hope for anything. Instead of what he thought might be a new relationship, he now felt further from Sirius than ever. 

“Want to know something even more fucked up?” he continued, laughing hollowly. “I still love him. I want to forgive him. I want to run to him and throw myself in his arms. I want to write off everything that he did as pressure because of… Well. Everything with his family. You have heard enough that I am sure that you can imagine.”

“Remus, love. Nothing can excuse that betrayal. I know that things aren’t easy. And that Sirius struggles with mental health. But, he is supposed to be your best friend. His actions could have caused three deaths. Sev, James and you. Because they would either put you in a camp for dangerous creatures or execute you,” Lily said firmly but kindly. 

“I still feel guilty though. I should just let it go. It’s breaking James' heart every time he has to leave one of us to spend time with the other. Because I just can’t be around Sirius. Classes are hard enough. I go to the dorm as little as possible. I’m afraid I’ll just lose it. And any action would be something I regret. Yelling, forgiving him, kissing him. Nothing feels right. But if I just let it go back to normal, he won’t be so sad.” 

“This is about you though Remus, you can’t put everyone above yourself,” Lily said. 

“But if I don’t I will lose all three of them. James is his best friend, his brother, his soulmate, his… something. But. Eventually James will choose him. Or I will push James away so that he will be happy too. Because him and Sirius need each other. And Peter will do whatever James does.” Remus said. He had already spilled out everything else, so might as well get into his deepest fears too. 

Remus didn’t feel like arguing. “Everything hurts Lils. It all feels washed out. Dull. Food doesn’t taste good. I think I’ve forgotten how to smile. I can’t focus on homework, and I honestly don’t find myself caring either. I either can’t sleep or sleep too much. Even colors feel muted. I don’t even know how to explain it.” 

“Remus. You’re worrying me. This sounds like major depression,” Lily was playing with his fingers. 

“I’ll be okay, I promise. I am sorry, I shouldn’t be putting all of my problems on you. I was just…” Remus waved his other hand around uselessly. 

“Remus. I want you to always talk to me. I’m glad that you trust me. But. I think that you need help. Will you come and talk to Madam Pomfrey? Honestly, if you don’t, I am worried enough I will do it regardless,” Lily said, nervously. 

Remus didn’t have the strength to fight her, so just meekly followed her through the hallways and she sat with him while he tried to explain it all to the nurse. Pomfrey gave him a big hug and said that she had a few things that might help. 

Remus managed a small smile of thanks and could only hope she was right. 

**I do not agree with jkr nasty views. I love taking the characters and making them queer 🏳️‍🌈

[periodic-table-yaoi]

HI !! HELLO !!!!!! ☆

hi :}

name’s Aster

he/it/they/pix

17 years old (feb 7)

transmasc genderfaun, gay aceflux, (some objectum shit going on maybe fuck if I know)

en + fr ; mostly french (Sorry) + caribbean (vincentian !) and Miscellanous European Slop in there

audhd synesthesia and Many other such things. you may find out. Either way there’s crazyyy shit going on in there

moth therian ! pink snout moth specifically but anything pink fits the bill. also whatever the fuck it is with kinning stars (fuck if I know pt. 2)

i sign most of my art as ‘chemicalfuzzy’ because that’s what I go by nearly everywhere else. that’s me I swearsies !

ABNORMAL . IN THE HEAD .

more cool stuff below ^_^

✦ — obligatory List of Things I’m Normal About

misc ✧

the periodic table (SEE URL…) (also anything relating to chemistry & nuclear physics)

MY OCs ���� I LOVE THEM 👍

MY FRIEND’S OCs !!!! I LOVE THEM TOO !!

music. Which is why it gets its own section below lol

space !! mostly stars !!

BUGS !!!!

music ✧

radiohead

nine inch nails

massive attack

will wood

femtanyl

black midi

car seat headrest

machine girl

jack stauber

THERE’S A WHOOOLE LOT MORE. IF I PUT EVERYTHING IT’S GONNA LOOK VERY GOOFY really the first 2-3 are what you Seriously really need to worry about. Also please do send recs I love music recs pretty please I #love expanding my music taste. I’m an album freak and physical media hoarder also that’s important to know

media ✧ (a lot of these especially are kinda old & dusty, but I still love them. Or they won’t let me go)

rain world

pokémon

object shows

deltarune

the smurfs. No seriously

cookie run

kirby

✦ — extra things to know

this is a reblog heavy place !! I don’t make a lot of original posts, if any, at least at the moment. that may change idk I’m very shy. feel free to ask me stuff though !

zionists & terfs & proshippers and the like are not welcome At All in here. In case you somehow thought you were LMAO

mutuals can ask me for my discord if you guys wanna… smiles so sweetly

I usually tag anything I reblog about often enough. if you’re a mutual & need something filtered do ask me

if you sent me an ask or reached out to me in Any way and I didn’t respond I AM NOT IGNORING YOU OR MAD AT YOU OR ANYTHING….. either I was too tired/overwhelmed at the time of seeing it and kept putting it off or I just didn’t see. either way I’m very sorry !!!

I’ll build further on this post later, likely. I’m making that thang up as I go !!! At the time of writing this it is 3:18 AM !!!! I am living the life

i.,m. Silly.

✧ — seepy cosy collection

it’s ongoing . I desperately need nin cds but my local record store hates them I think

[hanbeanz]

reflections/rant on making content (tw: negative)

on monday i fell really sick to the point that i had no energy to do anything but sleep.. this, accompanied by the fact that my content hasn’t been doing very well recently, either because the quality is not there/i’m not improving, made me private my blog for a few days just to rest and think about whether i really want to make content. does it really make me happy? or am i just creating content for the numbers/reblogs? if i continue like this, i would lose the spark that i had when i started this blog for hanbin.

sometimes i also wondered, if i didn’t use the hashtags that different users track, would people still be interested in what i posted? do they feel obliged to reblog just because i used their tag? and is it worth it to put in so much effort just for my posts to flop..? they take time to make and it’s tiring not seeing results.

in the end, i decided that i’m going to make things that i enjoy, whether or not my posts get notes, so that at least i enjoy the process of creating. as long as there’s even 1 person that likes what i post, i will continue to run this blog. i know nobody cares, feel free to ignore this but i’ll leave this post up to keep myself accountable.

thanks to my friends who checked up on me and sorry for the negativity :) i’m trying my best to improve and make better content. and thanks to all who’ve supported my stuff so far, i really appreciate you!

[oc-menagerie-archived]

ooc: Rules/Info (Pinned!)

Sorry if it seems a bit long, it's mostly info.

I am a mother of a one year old and therefore don’t have a ton of time to spend roleplaying on here so I may be slow. But I swear I’ll get to my replies eventually.

I don’t really like roleplaying in IMs, I’m easily forgetful and am highly likely to forget we’re even roleplaying there.

Things I won’t roleplay: Horror, gore, things of that nature, weight gain fetishes.

I don’t mind doing a little nsfw but prefer to fade to black rather than full on write smut. But I’m alright answering some nsfw asks.

If you don’t feel like doing a thread anymore, feel free to drop it. I’m also always fine starting new threads!

If you want to, search my tags for “starter call” and feel free to like any no matter how old if that muse interests you. I don’t mind at all. ^_^ Also feel free to send me any memes I’ve reblogged no matter how old.

I’m not a mutuals only blog. Even if I don’t follow you back, I’m still up for interacting with you! I like to keep my dash clean though so if you post a bunch of ooc stuff, I won’t follow back but only for that reason.

My icons don’t belong to me. I got them from people who post them up and only wish for a like as credit. If you are wondering where I got them feel free to message me and I’ll link you the page. :D

I am semi-selective and OC-friendly (since this is an OC blog. lol). I’m also ok if people want to ship my OCs with Canon characters or other OCs. I don’t mind discussing pre-established relationships either.

I’m really bad at working with one liner threads. It is difficult for me to write against as I’m too used to the multi-para style on Gaia Online though on here try to stick with one paragraph maybe more. I apologize as I might decline roleplaying with you or drop a thread if it is only one liners.

If a reply I make isn’t something you can work with or something is wrong with it, please tell me! I don’t mind at all and won’t get mad. Sometimes I might make a not so great post because I’m tired or not thinking straight so I don’t mind editing it. Better that then just have it ignored and not continued on.

Also if I break a rule of yours somehow also please tell me. I follow a lot of people and read all their rules page but might forget something sometimes.

Do not try to force me to reply or harass me. I will get annoyed and possibly unfollow you and if it becomes a really bad problem, will block. Especially don’t force smut upon me. I also reserve the right to refuse to roleplay with anyone.

Please no god-modding/power playing (meaning controlling my characters completely, auto hitting them, killing them without my ok). Nobody really likes it. Unless I give you the okay like it’s a crack rp or it’s something small like moving my character along to move things quicker.

I’m multi-ship so each relationship exists in its own universe. There is no cheating unless we decide to make it so.

[alltheselights]

Hi Emma how are you doing?

I just wanna ask if you have ever felt tired being in this fandom? I've been here for as long as you are, and have been following you since Day 1. I know I still love Louis and the boys as I did, but I don't really have the energy to engage with the fandom anymore. Have you ever felt like you wanna quit and just being a casual fan?

Hi bub! So sorry for the delayed response and for anybody else who’s sent me asks the last few days. I’ve been really swamped at work and just haven’t had much free time. BUT here I am. To answer your question, I feel tired of being in this fandom all the time! Usually it’s just a passing annoyance, but when it gets really bad, I try to take a step back. I’ll check in on what Louis and Harry are doing and I’ll keep my blog queue running, but I try not to read any of the commentary because that’s usually what exhausts me - the fans. I try to focus on my other hobbies and read books, watch movies, binge TV shows, things like that....anything that will really eat up my brain space so I’m not thinking about fandom or any of the things that annoy me about it. Once I’ve taken a few days away, I usually feel better and can tune back in more fully.

I think it’s really normal, especially in a fandom like this where people get more annoying by the day, to not really want to engage anymore. And if that’s how you’re feeling, don’t engage! If you just keep up with update accounts that post  the basic happenings, it can be pretty easy to ignore the discourse and just enjoy the boys. And if you want to take a step back fully, try taking a total break for a few days and see how you feel. If you don’t want to completely leave the fandom, I think breaks and/or just keeping up with the pictures and videos and ignoring the tags, asks, tweets, and other discourse will really help.

[gildinbainas]

:｡･:*:･ﾟ’★,｡･:*:･ﾟ’☆

Hi! Welcome to my blog! Some important ‘need to know’ info can be found in this pinned post along with helpful links. I encourage you to check them out before approaching me. ( Note that some information is not availible so I would implore you seek out wikipedia in the meantime. Or you can simply ask. I’m too tired and lazy to go back and forth with tumblr over the use of java for long bio pages. )

:｡･:*:･ﾟ’★,｡･:*:･ﾟ’☆

🛑  CHARACTER BIOS - incomplete but working on it || 🛑 FULL GUIDELINES HERE ( unformatted version found here. 😎 )

✅ MEME tag || MASTER HC tag || PSA tag || OPEN STARTERS tag

:｡･:*:･ﾟ’★,｡･:*:･ﾟ’☆

STATUS:  OPEN FOR SHIPPING ( LIMITED ) CURRENT MAINS/AFFILIATES: @nicholas-wolfwood, @nvrcmplt,  @thunderbringer, @diverse-hearts, @despairforme, TBA CURRENT EXCLUSIVES: @shacchou ( priest seto - with ATEM ), @rhaegxr​ ( rhaegar targaryen - with ATEM ), @nvrcmplt ( beschu - with ATEM ), 

CURRENT  ACTIVITY  STATUS:  HIATUS W/ LIMITED ACTIVITY  || I work full time in the Education profession meaning I work at least 40 hours a week / 5 days a week. There are kids in my care which means I never get a day off. I’m also dealing with family issues and mental health issues. Please understand that while I try not to leave people hanging, my real life will always come first. --- I am most active on the weekends.

MOST WANTED SHIPS / CONNECTIONS:   Bard the Bowman, Thorin, or any elf from the Tolkien’s series, Gannicus, Spartacus, Aegon Targaryen, Aerys II Targaryen, Rhaegar Targaryen, Oberyn Martel, Barristan Selmy, Jorah Mormont, Khal Drogo, Petyr Baelish, Victarion Greyjoy, Jaime Lannister ( GoT / ASOIAF ), Lestat de Lioncourt ( - TVC / IWTV ), Trevor Belmont, Issac, Godbrand ( Castlevania ), Thief King Bakura ( though ill be HIGHLY selective ), Kaiba, Priest Mahad / Dark Magician ( YGO Duel Monsters series ), Sasuke Uchiha, Itachi Uchiha, Deidara, Naruto Uzumaki, Kakashi Hatake (Naruto Series ), Erwin Smith ( AoT )

Please  understand  that  ‘most  wanted  ships’  or  connections’  doesn’t  necessarily  mean  I  want  to  ROMANTICALLY ship  with  them  all.  However,  with  some  of  them,  I  am  open  to  it  if  the  chemistry  is  there.

:｡･:*:･ﾟ’★,｡･:*:･ﾟ’☆

Please understand before you follow me that I don’t always follow back right away or at all. I love a small dash with barely anyone on it except for me and my replies. If this is a deal breaker for you then I am sorry.

I  AM  NOT  MUTUALS  ONLY.  Nonmutuals may interact but I reserve the right to ignore anyone I don’t want to interact with or I feel I won’t vibe with at all.

I  DON’T  FILL  OUT  INTEREST  CHECKERS  OR  PERMANENT  STARTERS.  Unless you’re a terrible writer, a smut blog or your canons contradict my vision for my muses, then odds are I may be willing to interact eventually.

I  am over the age of  21  (  30+  TO  BE  EXACT  ) which means I will only play with adults. No age on your blog, no interactions. No exceptions.

COVID IS NEVER A TOPIC TO BE USED IN INTERACTIONS. Terminal illnesses are my hard no forever and always.

LASTLY,  I am not perfect and much like everyone else around here, mistakes have been made. However,  i’ve never  tolerated any kind of common problematic behavior.  PLEASE  COME  TO  ME  POLITELY  IF  YOU  SEE  SOMETHING  THAT  MAKES  YOU  UNCOMFORTABLE.   I will not tag every trigger ever but if there’s something that you feel I should genuinely know or change, I am willing to listen IF you approach me politely and not aggressively or in a condescending manner. Tone matters.

:｡･:*:･ﾟ’★,｡･:*:･ﾟ’☆ (  credits  )

[ ALL PROMOS, MOBILE HEADERS, DASH ICONS, BANNERS & THEME WERE CODED BY THE LOVELY  cerberuscommissions​. ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐Would highly recommend. Please do not steal. I give her full credit for all main graphics used on this blog, even if i sometimes forget to mention it in posts. IN ADDITION,  some of my gif icons were commissioned while others were found in free gif hunts. I have also made some of my own icons while again, others were found in the tags on tumblr. My fancy ATEM BORDER was made by @faegfx​ . All credit to her. Alucard border is by floragfx.  ]

Short List of Muses featured below the cut. Bolds are mains. Others are ‘as I feel like playing them’ characters or test muses.

THANK YOU FOR READING 🤍

Thranduil Ororpher ( The Hobbit / Tolkien ) Daemon Targaryen Daenerys Targaryen ( ASOIAF / Game of Thrones ) Aegon I Targaryen ( ASOIAF / Game of Thrones ) Ka Suo ( Ice Fantasy series ) Pharaoh Atem / Yami Yugi ( Yu-Gi-Oh Duel Monsters franchise ) Nasir ( Spartacus ) Katniss Everdeen ( OG THG ) Gaara ( Naruto Shippuden ) Kakashi Hatake ( Naruto Shippuden ) Iruka Umino ( Naruto Shippuden ) Bonnie Bennett (TVD) Stede Bonnett ( OFMD ) Aziraphale ( Good Omens ) Alucard Tepes ( Castlevania Netflix ) Hector ( Castlevania ) Louis de Pointe du Lac (  Interview with the Vampire / TVC - mixed media ) Charles Xavier ( XMCU / various comic universes ) ***Request / Potential Mutual Exclusive Muses Only. ( These will NOT have a long winded bio up simply because I will only play them ‘In Fandom’ OR ‘with a select few’ )

Geralt of Rivia ( The Witcher Netflix )

Stefan Salvatore

Coriolanus Snow ( THG ) 

Rhaenyra Targaryen

Loki ( MCU )

Levi Ackerman

Armin Arlert

Dracula ( historically based )

I do have muses from The Vampire Diaries, Harry Potter / Fantastic Beasts and a slew of Marvel / Disney people. You have to inquire about them since I put most of them on side blogs i only use sporadically. I am however, willing IF you plot with me first or have GENUINE interest in writing long term.

[tendousthoughts]

HQ Boys Thinking Their S/O Left Them Pt. 3

Character(s) included: Oikawa & Kyoutani

Requested by: @chibiiichann

Warning(s): Cursing, Mention of bullying [Oikawa], Mention of flinching [Kyoutani], Hints towards readers tough past [Kyoutani]

Song of the day: Trees II by McCfferty

A/N: First off thanks for 200- I know I said it a lot but I’m just so glad! Next, many of you haven’t seen but I have updated a few things. One of the biggest being my name I go by. At the moment I’m trying out Xic. I also noted my pronouns and stuff. Which you can all find on my announcements post. Now back to some more ‘important’ things [though this is important, this is not why you came here!]. Sorry about the long wait for part three! Please read through the warnings again to make sure everything is okay. Thank you for everything. Bye!

Where to find all the parts!

Where to find all my content!

Tag(s): @chibiiichann & @corporeal-terrestrial

Oikawa

He was at it again. Working late nights and shit. You were happy for him. You were. Of course you were. He was back doing what he loved. He was back playing volleyball. With that happiness also came fear and worry. You knew how he was. Everyone who ever met him, knew how he was. He over worked himself. He always did and scared you. No matter how hard he tried not to. He pushed himself past his limits. Even after the doctor already told him, if he didn’t ease up on the practice, his knee would get even worse. But he was Oikawa Tōru. Determined and intelligent.

It was ten thirty and he already missed your date. Which you expected to happen, but it still kind of hurt. You tried calling for the fifth time that night, but you were met with the same thing. After a few rings it went to voicemail.

“Hey! You’ve reached the voicemail of Oikawa Tōru, thank you for calling! At the moment I’m busy but I promise after I’m done I’ll call you back. If you want, leave me a message and I’ll get back to you. Byeee!”

You waited all night for him to come home around twelve thirty. He looked tired. Extremely tired and to be honest that pissed you off more. Not only did he not respond but he over worked himself again, and when he woke up the next night sore, you were the one who would have to take care of him.

Instead of bringing it up you waited for the morning. Not wanting to have this conversation while he was tired. It would feel like you were talking to yourself, and he wouldn’t understand. So you went to bed with him and by the morning he was already up before you.

You went to the kitchen to find him shuffling through your medication bin. “Are you sore?” You ask, looking at him.

“I’ll be fine, I just need breakfast and some medicine,” he muttered. He couldn’t have cared less. At least that’s what it looked like. He didn’t even spare you a glance.

“Maybe you should listen. You know, lay off volleyball practice for a day or something. Try to lesson the hours and stuff..” You looked back at him for his reaction.

“Can’t. If I ease up I’ll never be able to catch up.” He finally looked to you now, finding the medicine.

“I mean I think you will be fine. It is taking over your whole life and stuff so I just don’t want it to be a bigger issue. Like you know.. with your knees and stuff.” Your eyes are pinned on him.

“I told you not to worry about my knee, and it’s not taking up my life okay? It has and will always be my life. It’s the only thing I’m good at. So no, I'm not going to take a break.” He snapped at you. Which caught you off guard.

“It is… It is taking up your life,” you replied which made his face change.

“You don’t understand how it is like me. You don’t! I understand you don’t have anything you're good at and shit. But you have to understand that I actually have goals in life okay? You have to understand that my fucking life won’t revolve around you and how you feel when I do something. It won’t and never will. You and I are together because I feel like having you around. Because you know what, volleyball is the only thing that distracts me from leaving. Volleyball is the only thing I can do to escape you!” He screamed.

It takes a few seconds for the weight of his words to sink into your skin. But here’s the thing. You knew what you were up against when you started dating him. He just lit a fuse in you. A spark that made an explosion of feelings hit you. When it did you couldn’t control your words. “After all that practice I wondered why you never made it to nationals. I mean seriously. You need a distraction from me, right? Your always doing it, and get you can’t even fucking get to nationals. Not only that but I can see why your last girlfriend left you. You're a dick. You can’t remember a fucking date. A fucking date we have been planning for weeks. Oh wait, let me correct that, a date I’ve been planning for weeks. Not only that but I took my fucking time to work around your schedule. For you not to even send a message.” You spat out. You looked down at him, “I wonder sometimes if everyone was right. You and me. Never belonged. I’m just a distraction from such a ‘handsome’ and ‘kind’ person.”

He looked hurt at first, but then again he started it and intended to finish it. “I can see why your whole family doesn’t talk to you. You always think you're the best or something. Maybe I remembered the date. Have you ever thought of that? Maybe I didn’t wanna hangout with you. Maybe I didn’t want to hear you nagging me every fucking second. You know what? I can see why people fucking hate you. Bully you and shit. Your such a fucking selfish freak.”

“What..?” You looked at him. You told him you were bullied, because you thought of him as your safe space. You thought of him as the only person who understood you. You felt safe when he was around you. You felt understood. To use that against you. To say you deserved it. To say you deserved to get hurt. To get shamed. To get everything that happened to you… it was your fault?

“What are you too dumb to understand?” He laughed at you. Hatred and venom spilling from his lips. “Awe.. look at the baby. You should be grateful I didn't break up with you. You should be thankful because I’m the only reason you're even someone.”

Tears filled your eyes. “God fucking damn it.” You muttered softly. You weren’t going to allow him to take you down. You were stronger then he would ever understand. “You really think anyone wants to hang out with you..? Do you fucking think anyone find you a good person..? Your just a fucking pretty face, okay? Your nothing compared to anyone else on your team. You might not realize it but to be honest sometimes I do want to be set free. Set free from this shitty relationship okay? That’s the truth. Sometimes I get sick of having to take care of you. When your fucking sore before you over works your self again. I am the only one trying to keep you okay. I’m the only one who actually thinks about the long run. No matter how hard you practice in the end you won’t even be able to walk. Let alone play volleyball and shit. You know what sometimes I get sick of being the only fucking one trying to keep us together.”

“Then maybe you should give up okay. Maybe we should finally go our separate ways. I mean after all, you're too easy.” He was hurt. He just blurted out whatever he thought would hurt you the most. Which fucking worked. Before you had said anything more he had left the room, leaving you stunned.

It took a moment but before you knew it you were out of the house, crying and walking the farthest away from your shared house as you could. “Fuck..” you whisper. Did he really not want to be with you..? You should have known. This relationship wasn’t a relationship. You barely talked. You felt alone. So fucking alone.

It took an hour for him to fully cool down. When he walked out of the room he was expecting you to be waiting for him. He was expecting everything to be okay. When he was met with the emptiness. The emptiness of you being actually gone. He was met with the realization that his words were taken just how he thought he wanted them to be.

You on the other hand we’re at the park blasting music in your ears. Forcing the thoughts to be pushed deep down. Forcing you to forget everything. Everything that hurts you. Maybe it would be best if you guys did go your separate ways..? You knew this wasn’t good for your mental health. But fuck that. This was the only thing that made you feel grounded. Made you feel okay. When he wasn’t with you or practicing he was out with friends, drinking and partying. You couldn’t continue to live like this. So maybe it would be best to let go. To give up on everything and everything you loved… your everything was him. You always argued and at this point you felt sick. Thinking about it just broke you. You had no more tears to cry, with your tear stained cheeks you decided to go back. To your home. It was over. Everything you had built up was coming crashing down.

On his side he was freaking out. He knew he was in the wrong. He knew there was no excuse for what he did to you, but what could he say? You were gone already. It took a bit for him to get to the nerve to call you. To his surprise he heard the sound of your ringing phone. So you left it. Maybe you were going to come back. Maybe you will and then everything will be okay again. Maybe everything would be perfect. It was a small chance but that's all he could hold on to.

When you walked in it was quiet, but there were soft whimpers and cries coming from your shared room. Gently you knocked on the door and waited for a response. You were surprised when you immediately heard a stumble and then were met with a hug. Your shoulder almost immediately feels wet to the touch. “Ba.. Oikawa..?” You muttered.

“Please don’t call me that.. please..” He muttered softly. His face buried deep into your clothes.

You kinda ignored his response. “I came back to get my stuff. I took into consideration what you said and I realized that you don’t deserve to be distracted by me all the time..” You whispered softly. “So like you said earlier.. I think it is best if we stop seeing each other.. entirely because I don’t know if I could let you go otherwise..”

His arms tightened around you, “C..can we please talk about it first.. please..” his nightmare was coming true, and maybe it was dumb but he didn’t realize how much he needed you.

“There’s nothing to talk about.. I don’t understand why you want to make it harder on me. I gave you what you wanted okay..? You can practice your heart out and hangout with your friends and stuff okay? You can finally find someone who will fit all your needs. You and I both know that I will never be what you want. So maybe it would be best if we just let go..”

“No… please no.. that’s not what I want.. I want to make it up to you and be there for you and I want to make you happy and I want everything to be perfect. I know I messed up okay? I don’t deserve you and I don’t know what came over me today because you're everything I’ve ever wanted. I know I don’t deserve it and there’s no excuse for what I said or did… I know I should let you find someone better but I love you. I love you so fucking much. I know I’ve been lacking and I want to make up for it. I want to be someone you want to be around again.. I love you so fucking much okay? I should have been there. I shouldn’t have said the things I did. I know I don’t deserve a second chance but please.. just one more.. I promise I’ll make it up to you.” He didn’t want to let go of everything.

“I’m sorry too.. you didn’t deserve it. I’m sorry for everything and that’s why I want to let you go. To find someone who will not hurt you like I hurt you.. You and I both know that I can't resist it. I don’t know why you do this to me.. pull me back.. you have one more chance… Please don’t make me regret it. I really love you but this.. this isn’t going to work if we do what we are doing now okay? We will just tear each other more and more apart..” you whispered gently, kissing his head. Your arms finally meet his back as you hold him. “I’m sorry.. but I’ve got you now baby. I love you so fucking much..”

Kyoutani

Kyoutani was the type of person most people would never understand. Not because they were “difficult” or anything.. they just never took the time too. Well other than you. You were different. You understood his outburst and such. But at the same time you were human. There was only so much you could take. There was only so much you would take.

When he came into the locker room you were already waiting for him. He had been thrown out of the game for fighting with a few people. You knew he was frustrated. You could hear the crowd from a mile away shouting to kick him off. It was harsh. Even for ‘mad dog’ which he hated to be called. He hated to be tied to an animal.. and always being an angry reck. Anybody would. But of course nobody understood other than you. When he sat on the bench you immediately rushed over.

“Baby.. I’m sorry.. You didn’t deserve that.. just ignore them, please. I know it’s hard but their not important okay..?” You we’re just trying to comfort him. But there were times when Kyoutani couldn’t control himself. Like any other person when they get looked down at every fucking moment of their lives. When they are ridiculed and laughed at all the time. When they are nothing more than an angry person.. Sometimes there is nothing more to do than be the person everyone so desperately makes you out to be.

“Not important? Not important! I just got fucking kicked from the game because of them chanting to kick me. They didn’t even fucking have the decency to call me by my name. So don’t tell me it’s okay and that their opinion on me doesn’t matter. Because quite frankly their opinion is the only one that matters it seems.” He lashed out.

“I didn’t mean to upset you. It’s just that.. it wasn’t entirely their fault. You were arguing with the other team members.” You muttered. It wasn’t meant to do any harm, just for him to keep in mind.

“Are you serious right now.? Nobody else got kicked. Nobody. If they can’t handle a little trash talking, maybe they shouldn’t play a sport. I mean seriously there’s no need for them to tell the referees to kick me.” He started raising his voice when he spoke.

“I know it’s just that.. maybe you should try and not trash talk you know?” You whispered softly, retreating a bit.

“What?” He looked annoyed. “God ducking damn it. How can you be so cute but so fucking annoying. I mean seriously how can someone with such a face be so fucking dumb and so annoying?” His hands were balled into fist

“I..I don’t understand, can you tell me why you act so sweet..? Then so cold the next moment..? You don’t mean it right..? Please say you don’t mean it.” You were worried you loved him but god it was hard. It was hard to respond when your friends asked about your relationship. It was hard when they flaunted their perfect relationship and then asked about yours. Its was so fucking hard.

“Do you think I would say it otherwise..?” He looked at you. He laughed at you as he saw your pitiful expression. God it was almost sickening how much he saw that expression. That expression that nobody else had ever shown him. The one of worry  but at the same time already knowing it was coming. He loved it. He loved everything about you. But most of the time you pissed him off. This relationship wasn’t healthy. But for god sake you already started counseling. But fuck this was a bad idea.

Silence. Nothing could come out. You wanted to scream. You wanted to forget this. You wanted it to stop. Everything to stop.

“Answer me.” He punched the wall next to you. Fear spreading all over your face. Fuck. Fuck. Not here. Please no. He gripped your warm face making it so cold in seconds. Forcing you to look at him he laughed at your crying face. But when you didn’t stop for a minute he immediately backed away. He fucked up. He knew he fucked up. “Wait I’m sorry baby..” he muttered.

“Please stop. Please. I won’t do it again.” Flashbacks we’re pulling you way too far out. You were drowning. No one was around to save you. He was laughing as you begged to be saved, pushing you deeper into your own pool of your own thoughts. You were so cold. The next second you were able to move back to the surface.

Realization hit as he stepped back. “I..I am sorry..” he muttered softly as he left the room without another word leaving his mouth. Words were banging on his lips but he knew if he spilled them out everything out it would just hurt you ten times more.

You got up five minutes later, finally pulled back to reality and decided to get up. Grabbing your stuff you walked back into the stadium. Waving a small wave to the rest of his team before exiting. Confusion was read all over as they saw your tear stained face. To be honest, all that was running through your mind was that you didn’t want Kyoutani to break up with you. You didn’t want to be alone, again. You didn’t want to be just another one of his ex’s. So for the better of both of you it would be best to leave him be. To let him cool off.. for him to feel better.

He was freaking out. He fucked up. You. You were his everything, not only that but you were more than just that. You were like a fucking rainbow at the end of a rainy day. You were his partner in crime. You made him feel normal, you made him feel safe, and loved. He couldn’t believe he just put that all in danger. He just put everything on the line because of some stupid game. He hit the wall hard, “fuck me. I’m sorry y/n..” he muttered as he sank to the floor and balled up. Tears burning through his eyes. He did the one thing he promised you that he would protect you from. You became the one thing he was always scared of becoming. He loved you so much, he love you so fucking much.

You left and got into your car. Sinking into your seat you locked the doors, and hit the steering wheel. Taking a deep breath salty tears rolled down your already stained face. Placing the key in and turning it the car started. Next thing you knew you had left wherever you could go. You loved him. So fucking much. But it was hard to be okay when he acted so fucking rough with you. It was hard to stay calm and not imagine your past relationship in this one. You tried. You really did but god it was hard to feel okay, feel okay about everything happening around you. It was too much. So fucking much. It made your head hurt.

When the game ended Kyoutani was still freaking out, now moved back into the lockers. He didn’t know what he was expecting but he knew he hoped you would still be there. God damn it. He fucked up. You had left. You were gone. Tears brimming his eyes as he teammates walked in. Now mentioning it to his teammates their faces seemed to change. More salty fucking tears left his eyes, as he heard about what type of pain you looked like you were in.

You headed back to your shared place. Unsure where else to go. You weren’t close with your family anymore. You had no friends. You had no work buddies. You had nobody but Kyoutani and in turn, now you were left alone with the thought of everything being gone. Ripped right out of your hands as you're forced to watch your whole world come crumbling down on you. You placed your stuff down on the side and laid on the bed. It smelled just like safety. Just like Kyoutani. You just wanted to be held. You just wanted everything to be perfect, again. To be okay at least. You needed him more than anything.

After a night out he finally made it back to your shared place. He didn’t want to be back without you, but you weren’t answering and he didn’t know what else to do. When he walked into the apartment he slowly walked into your shared room. There he saw you. Laying in bed cuddled up in the blankets. Slowly and carefully he walked up. Not wanting to cause you any more hurt. He missed you. Even for a few hours he had felt like he hadn’t seen you in years. But maybe that was because he thought that’s what might have happened. Maybe he thought you had left for good. Maybe he thought he would never have the chance to apologize. Never have the chance to hold you again. When he reached the bed he noticed that you were awake. “Hey y/n..” he muttered softly. The silence was killing him. “I’m so sorry. I know I fucked up. I promised to make you feel safe and protected around me. I made a promise to keep you safe and protected. I broke both of those. I fucked up. I know I did. I lashed out again. I did exactly what everyone says I do. I just get so fucking heated for no reason and I know I shouldn’t and I know I should just relax. But I feel like if I do the worlds would burn though my throat and then it would just explode.. and I know it’s stupid and I know I end up hurting you more. I know that there is no good reason to do that. But I just.. I don’t know. You're the only one that makes me feel normal okay..? I know it’s not fair. I know it’s not. You just make me feel like whenever I’m with you that I’m floating. I just want everything to be okay again. I want everything to be back to normal. I know I should give you space but I missed you so much. I don’t want you to leave, please don’t leave..” he was crying again. He barely had any tears left to cry. He wanted to hold you but he knew it was a stupid idea. “I’m sorry for being so selfish.. but please..”

You never really heard him or saw him crack. But fuck. It hurts you so much. To see him beg for you to stay with him. What were you supposed to do..? Leave him now? That was never even the plan. You didn’t have a plan to be honest. You sat up biting your lip before you gently held him. “Hey baby it will be okay.. calm down I’ve got you.. I’m not going anywhere now. I promise you I’m not going anywhere.” You muttered softly. He melted into your touch. He knew he didn’t deserve it but he felt like he couldn’t breathe. “Shush… I’ve got you.. take a deep breath..” you mumbled softly kissing his head as he took deep breaths. Soon enough he was relaxed in your arms again. “You know and I know that I love you so much. But there’s a line between where I can take it and I can’t. I understand you get frustrated but I don’t deserve to be treated like that. I don’t deserve to be scared of being hit.. and I know we both know that. I try to be understanding but you need to try to be too okay..? I love you so much.. more than you might believe but Kyoutani I can’t handle being in a relationship with you if you're constantly annoyed or angry with me. I think we deserve to be happy.. and if that means needing to take a break then we would have to okay? You need to work on communicating. I know it can be hard.. but please..” you whispered. Tears flowing down your soft skin again. It was getting a lot. So it would be best if you told him… you needed him to understand.

He gently shook his head. He understood. He knew he was in the wrong. He knew he was lucky for you to be holding him.. for him to even still be in a relationship with you let alone it be still a romantic one. He loved you and he knew you didn’t deserve anything that he put you through. In the end all that mattered was you in his eyes. He was going to change.. he was. “I promise.. thank you y/n..” he whispered softly. Gently he wrapped his arms around you. “I love you so much..” he muttered. Everything would be okay.. he knew it was going to be now. All that mattered was that you were safe. That you were happy.. that you were in his arms again.

Follows and likes are appreciated! Please reblog if you enjoyed it, so more people can find my work! Thank you all for your support! Stay safe, and have a good rest of your day!

[writersrealmbts]

Clearwater Springs: Part 9

SDescription: ot7 x reader, reader’s choice, fairy/supernatural/soulmate au. The choices you make influence the story! In this world, war-torn and ragged, you’ve been offered a home and a job working as a librarian. Will you meet your soulmates? Will you ever find the shelves behind the piles of books? Who knows.

Warnings: idk

Posted: 08/18/2021

Tags: ot7 x reader, supernatural bts, soulmate au

3,463 words

A/N: Okay! Remember, two free-write and one survey chapter, which means the next survey chapter will be chapter 11 (technically they all are at this point), which means that the survey at the bottom of this post will be on part 10 as well. Sorry for the wait.

Previous ~ Next

You were in a warm cocoon, and you weren’t about to disturb it.

Yoongi was in cat form again, stretched out against your back, purring now and then in his sleep.

Namjoon was snoring, but you didn’t care because he was warm and his heartbeat was strong, and he was well-built. Strong enough to make you feel safe, soft enough to keep you comfortable. He was your haltija.

You lay in a comfortable doze for a while, smiling when Yoongi moved so you could pet him and he fell asleep again.

But then someone was sneaking in and over, fluttering above the ground and peering at you.

You yawned a bit, then turned to reach out both hands to him.

Jimin smiled and took your hands, gently pulling you from between the other two and into the air.

You grinned as he set you down on the floor by the bed, admiring his wings. His feathers looked shinier already, and the colors of his feathers seemed more vibrant. Happiness made such a difference in fairies.

Jimin tugged your hand gently, pulling you out of the room and down to Jin’s room.

The door swung open silently, revealing the most adorable sight of Jin and Jungkook cuddling. Jungkook’s arms wrapped around Jin, and head on Jin’s shoulder but still tucked close to Jin’s neck. Both of them looked so peaceful.

Jimin shared your smile, then tugged your hand again as he carefully closed the door.

Taehyung was being bearhugged from behind by Hoseok, drowsily watching some cartoon show that had the volume down as low as possible without muting it.

Hoseok murmured now and then, and pressed airy little kisses just barely into Taehyung’s hair--probably completely unfelt by the dryad. But he glanced over and smiled contentedly at you before whispering something that got a sleepy smile out of his companion.

You tugged on Jimin’s hand this time, drawing him into the kitchen. “Help me make them breakfast?”

He nodded.

You weren’t an exceptional cook, but you could make basic foods, and the boys didn’t seem to mind basic foods. “Did you sleep well, ma mignonne?”

He nodded emphatically. “Yesterday was tiring.”

Yoongi stalked in, scowling tiredly at you. “You left.”

“Sorry, mon chat minou,” You apologized, leaning over to peck his lips.

His eyes widened.

Jimin huffed, latching onto you again.

You leaned back into his arms and tilted your head back for a kiss.

He hesitated, but did kiss you—softly. As though you were a bubble that would pop at any moment. His lips soft against yours.

You brushed his cheek with your fingertips, keenly away of two more sets of eyes on the three of you.

Hoseok, probably already knowing the outcome, came over and claimed his kiss. “Morning, aluemdaun.”

You hummed happily at his casual compliment, curling your fingers around the neckline of his shirt. “Darling.”

Taehyung’s eyes were wide, and he slowly came forward.

You watched him with a soft smile. “Good morning, Taehyung. Did you sleep well?”

Taehyung nodded slowly.

You kissed his cheek, brushing over the spot where you kissed him with your thumb as you looked over his face. “Good.”

“So...does everyone know...about….” He gestured vaguely to your arm.

You nodded, smiling a little more. “Everyone knows. You can ask them anything about being soulmates that you want. You can touch them, hug them, kiss them, and they’ll have no room to complain because they’re stuck with all of us for the rest of our lives—provided all goes well.”

Taehyung started to get hints of excitement in his eyes. “Hugs?”

“As many as you like. Jimin gives especially good hugs.” You nodded toward the fairy, who was still cooking under your instructions.

Yoongi took Taehyung’s hand. “After we’re out of their way so they can make breakfast.”

Taehyung didn’t seem to accept that, turning and hugging onto Yoongi despite the werecat’s protests—loud as they were.

But Yoongi waddled himself and Taehyung out of the kitchen, and out of your way. And Taehyung forced his hugs on the werecat without avail.

You returned to your fairy, directing his actions with little gestures, happy when the food turned out well—just as Namjoon, Jin, and Jungkook joined everyone downstairs.

Jimin greeted them with a chirpy ‘Good Morning!’ while ushering them to the table. “We just finished making breakfast!”

Jungkook looked like he was still half-asleep, movements languid as Jin helped him to a spot at the table.

Yoongi was still trapped by Taehyung. “Stop it. Stop it. Let’s not do this. Stop it.”

Taehyung ignored him, nuzzling the were-cat’s neck until suddenly the were-cat shifted and escaped. Then he pouted, looking hurt and sullen.

Jin chuckled sleepily. “Come here, Taehyungie, we’ll catch him later for you to cuddle. Sit next to hyungie to eat.”

Hoseok easily claimed the seat on the other side of Taehyung. “Yoongi-hyung was probably just hungry, Taehyung. He’s not very forthright, but—” he dropped his glass, eyes glazed and far away. He frowned, hands hovering shakily over his plate.

You glanced at Jin for a moment.

Jin got up and went around to Hoseok’s side.

Hoseok’s gaze cleared slightly, but he looked shaken. “I need my crystal ball. Need to get upstairs.”

“I’ll help you,” Jin whispered softly, helping him up. “Even breaths, Hoseokie. Keep calm.”

Hoseok nodded, leaning into Jin. “Need to look. Need to see.”

You watched them go with a little worry, but you knew Hoseok would be fine as long as Jin was with him.

Today, you had work to do.

After you had made sure that Taehyung, Jungkook, and Jimin had ingested an adequate amount of food—and helped Yoongi make plates for the two that were absent—you went to your room, silently asking your waters for some good working clothes.

Your waters ignored you and gave you a dress, but at least the dress wouldn’t expose your body every time you moved.

Jimin was waiting with Parsley by the front door. “You’re going to the library, right?”

You smiled and nodded. “I have work to do. Are you coming with me?”

“You can’t go alone,” He said nonchalantly. “Too dangerous. Especially with a dark mage about.”

“True. But I wouldn’t like it if you didn’t want to come with me.”

“I want to,” He answered quickly, looking a little sheepish. “I really like it there. High ceilings. I can fly even though it’s raining.”

You smiled. “Alright, then.”

You peeked into the living room, noticing that Taehyung had ‘captured’ Yoongi again and that both were watching a movie with Jungkook and Namjoon. “I’m off to the library with Jimin. Be back later. Someone check on Jin and Hoseok if they don’t come down in an hour?”

“Mm’kay,” Namjoon answered distractedly, but you saw Yoongi look over at you and nod.

Rain didn’t bother you that much, it was just water after all, but Jimin seemed a little averse to it, so you made sure he had the umbrella. Not that it was much of a rainstorm, the gentle pattering drops far more soothing than harsh. Pleasant and somewhat warm.

There was a truck sitting in front of the library, and Valina was under the overhang of the doors, glaring at another person.

Jimin gently touched your shoulder and took off to watch from a distance, a distance from which he could easily intervene if he needed.

You carried the closed umbrella up to those waiting, wondering what was going on. “Hello Valina, how may I assist you?”

She glanced at you, eyes widening slightly, panicked a little.

“Ah! You must be the librarian, I am Grendel,” The dark mage said, turning toward you and bowing.

You froze, but tried not to display your panic. “A pleasure, I’m sure.”

“Yes, well, you see, as well as conducting my own business, I was asked to convey this load of books to this…charming town’s library.” He eyed you. “I had not realized that this library was run by a xana.”

“I had not realized my species could be of any interest to any being other than my own kind,” You answered evenly. “There is a room around the side of the building for after-hours book deliveries and donations, and the sign is right there, as well. I believe that lettering is large enough for any to read.”

“Ah, but I have…certain donations that need special care, and I wished to convey the instructions in person—as I was telling this…fiery, young woman.”

“That’s witch to you! And I told you I could have given her the instructions.” Valina crossed her arms.

“And I told you, there are certain things that only a librarian can understand. This place has special vaults for…dangerous tomes, does it not?” He turned to you.

“We would have to ask the owner of the library,” You answered vaguely. “I have not been informed of any. If you would be so kind as to deliver the rest to the side room, I will call the owner and have him come and talk with you.”

“I was specifically instructed—”

“I understand,” You cut him off. “However, I have no answers as to security for dangerous tomes, and for that, the owner is required. Once he has answers in regards to the safety of such tomes, then we may further discuss the tomes staying here. Until then, please patiently wait in the delivery room around the side of the building. I shall not ask again.”

“But—”

“You have about five seconds before I start singing: can you bare it, mage?” You asked, eyes narrowing in a challenge.

His mouth clamped shut and he bowed stiffly. “As you have asked, so shall I do.”

You nodded firmly and moved to the front doors, waiting until he was pulling the truck to the side of the building before unlocking the front doors and ushering Valina inside.

“Are you crazy? He’s a dark mage!” She hissed the moment the door closed.

“I am…very…aware…of…that…,” You said in between trying not to hyperventilate in the ensuing panic.

Jimin landed and quickly wrapped his arms and wings around you, forcing Valina to back up. “You’re crazy. You’re absolutely crazy.”

You just hugged him back with all of your might. “Need to call Jin.”

“I’ll do that,” Valina said, regarding you and Jimin and just a tiny bit disconcerted.

“It’s a trick, right? He’s just trying to get to you, right?” Jimin asked, sounding panicked.

Parsley twined around your feet, mewling.

“Where’s his pheonix?” You whispered.

You saw Valina look up sharply.

Jimin let go of you and shrunk, darting off to look.

You went to the desk slowly, sitting down and beginning your work. “He stop at your shop first?”

“Not exactly. Had a feeling.” Valina leaned against the counter, frowning. “A faun pointed him out to me, and my brain worked from there. My coven will ward the town. We’ve already been setting up protection wards on people’s houses, so most people should be safe at night. Except your house. But you have a haltija.”

“And a were-cat, and a djinn, dryad, seer, incubus-fairy mix, and a human that I swear has magic in his blood.”

“Mr. Kim definitely has magic in his blood,” Valina said, eyes flashing pink. “Ancient magic, but it is there. His family tree is made of touched and clearsighted.”

“Touched and clearsighted?” You asked.

“Touched people have a sort of intuition, they get a sense for things quickly—especially in regards to the magical. They tend to become fighters, people who protect others from…less-savory magic. Clearsighted folk can see through all magical protection that would confuse other humans. Why do you think he didn’t become a slobbering fool upon seeing you? Yes, he sees you’re hot as hell, but, because he has clearsight, he is able to resist that pull and instead focus on you as a person. Me? I have special charms to resist folk like yourself and stay a decent witch.” She looked you over and quickly looked away. “Though, I think it’s about time I recharge them.”

“I appreciate the effort,” You murmured, thinking about Jin and grateful for the distraction that she had been trying to give you. “There’s still so much I don’t know about the world and about people. I only knew my people.”

“Might help if you came into town more often.”

You looked at her quietly until she met your gaze with a little regret.

“Nevermind, that would be mass chaos and not pleasant for you. Forget I mentioned town. Let me ward it for your protection first.”

“Don’t go to any extra trouble on my account.”

“I won’t. My coven planned on putting up warding to protect from…unwanted behaviors.”

“You’re the police of the town, aren’t you?”

Valina grinned. “Yup! But don’t worry, we have people we answer to as well. Now, if we could get real town status, then we’d probably elect Mr. Kim as mayor—”

“Never gonna happen,” Jin said firmly, walking quickly over to you. “Are you okay?”

You nodded, standing up. “I sent him around the side to the drop-off area and Jimin is looking for the Pheonix, but he’s been gone since Valina called you.”

Yoongi shifted and ran out to see if he could track down the fairy.

Hoseok was looking a little…out of breath.

Jungkook seemed to be visually assessing you.

Namjoon was talking to the doorway.

Taehyung was looking around, awestruck. “Hyung…this place is so beautiful….”

Jin kissed your forehead and then glanced at Valina. “Got any extra protection charms?”

She patted her pockets demonstratively. “I was in a bit of a rush, toots. Apologies. Take the Djinn with you, he can use magic to protect you and it’s stronger than even a dark mage’s. He can protect you if he wishes.”

Hoseok gripped Jungkook’s arm. “No.”

Jungkook looked both surprised and hurt. “I can do it, hyung.”

“No, it has to be…” Hoseok looked desperately at him, then at you. “It has to be you. I…can’t tell you why…but I know….”

You could tell it was killing him to say it, tearing him up inside. “Okay. If you say it must be so, then it must be. Jungkook could protect us from here, correct?”

Hoseok considered for a moment, then nodded. “Yes.”

“Okay, now please sit down. You look so pale,” You pleaded softly, gently, touching his arm.

He relaxed a bit and pliantly let you guide him to your chair.

“Jungkook, Taehyung, Namjoon; please look out for Hoseok, I have a feeling he’s going to be having a rough day,” You asked, picking up Parsley and setting her in Hoseok’s lap. “Pet the kitty.”

Hoseok let out a small breath of an amused laugh, then did as told.

Then you and Seokjin went outside to meet the dark mage.

Grendel was waiting, looking patient, casually unloading boxes from the truck, but he quickly set aside the box he was carrying as he noticed your approach.

“This is Mr. Kim, the owner of the library. Mr. Grendel had inquiries about secure vaults for…dangerous tomes.”

Jin nodded. “I am only allowed by the government to approve of certain types of tomes. What is the nature of the tomes?” He pulled out some paperwork.

“One is a necromancers guide made with dragon leather,” Grendel said, looking worried.

You couldn’t help the gasp that escaped you.

Grendel nodded. “Dark magic that must be locked away and never let out again. And that one…that one should remain off-record if possible.”

Jin was quiet, partially frozen. “Where is that one?”

“Still on the truck. I didn’t want to unload it if it couldn’t stay here.”

Jin nodded slowly. “I know a place where it can go. I’m assuming you don’t want to know it’s final location either.”

“That would be correct.”

“Okay. And the other tomes?”

“A Demon Book, a Crimson portfolio, and the notebook of…Fausto Vilareyo,” Grendel finished, not meeting your gaze.

Your heart seemed to stop.

Jin was looking to you. “Fausto Vilareyo?”

“The first dark mage,” You answered, trembling.

Jin nodded slowly. “All of these fall within what I am able to take in. I will care for the notebook and the necromancer’s guide.”

You nodded. “I….”

“Can you go get me some notecards?” Jin asked, providing you with a brief escape. “And a pen?”

You nodded, turning and fleeing the presence of such an evil book.

The others startled when you hurried in.

“Everything okay?” Yoongi asked, pausing in his task of what appeared to be drying Jimin’s wings.

“Yes. Did you find the pheonix?”

“No,” Jimin said, drooping. “No sign of it.”

“That’s fine,” You said hastily, grabbing some things for yourself.

“Slow down,” Valina advised, “before you drop everything you’re trying to pick up.”

You just nodded and raced out again, pausing before the corner and composing yourself.

Grendel conveyed the instructions for the last two books, then bowed. “I thank you for guarding these relics. It has been a long journey to find a safe resting place for them.”

You dipped your head very slightly. “War makes many things difficult, though they be difficult to begin with.”

“Very true. I must be off. Many more false trails to lay,” Grendel said, bowing once more. He hesitated in leaving, though. “I know it may not mean much, but I apologize for the wrongs that have been committed toward your kind. I had never seen one of your kind in person before now and I regret not knowing. I do what I must, though, and for that I know I would never be able to listen to your songs. Thank you for your benevolence toward me, even knowing I am of the kind that is dangerous toward yourself.”

“If you continue to remove dangerous things from those who would abuse them, then I wish you luck,” You said, meaning it. Not just anyone would turn over what they had found to be locked away. And while his dark magic was fresh and potent, perhaps it was because he needed it to get those items. “May I ask, what were you doing in the forest?”

He blinked in surprise. “The forest? Oh…I…I’d actually heard that the forest was quite nice and I have this stupid pheonix that’s bound to me and he goes and gets into all sorts of trouble if I don’t properly exercise him.” He looked around. “Thinking of…you haven’t happened to see a pheonix?”

You shook your head rapidly.

Jin shook his head as well.

He sighed. “He probably went after the dragon magic, the stupid fledgling. Well. Either he gets eaten or he learns a lesson. Thank you for your time.” He bowed again and hopped into the truck.

“Dragon?” Jin asked, eyes wide.

“The river dragon, probably,” You offered.

Jin looked at you like you’d grown a second hand.

“Jungkook and I ran across him when we were passing the time before going to look for you. He’s my river-kin, apparently.”

Jin shook his head, showing you the vaults for the books you would care for, how to access them and such. “Of course he is.”

“Hoseok looked pale.”

“Yeah. He’s not as strong as he likes to convey.”

“Are any of us?”

Jin kissed your cheek. “Probably not.”

You ran your fingers along the mortar between the bricks. “Do you think he had an ulterior motive?”

“I don’t know. I guess we’ll find out. You want to stay at the library?”

You nodded. “I have work to do. Jimin will probably stay with me.”

He nodded. “I don’t think Taehyung will leave now, either. Is that okay?”

“He’s cute. Jimin and I can keep an eye on him.”

“Okay. I’m going to take the others home, then. Make sure Hoseok gets some water, food, and rest.” Jin kissed your cheek. “Don’t speak a word to the others about what books are hidden in the vaults. Or about the books I will be hiding. It’ll be safer.”

You nodded firmly. “Agreed. It’s for their own well-being. Hoseok knows.”

He nodded. “Probably.”

Yoongi stalked up in his black and grey form—his largest form—and then paused, getting ready to leap into Jin’s arms.

Jin stroked Yoongi’s head. “Hey. We’re okay. Thanks for worrying.”

Yoongi just snorted and rested, acting like he’d intended to fall asleep in Jin’s arms.

You reached over and scratched his head, then went into the library to finally do the work that you hadn’t been able to get done in the past three days.

–

Post-Chapter 9 Survey

Previous.  Next.

Masterlist.  Clearwater Springs Masterpost.

–

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[whorefordazai]

hi! I know that your requests are closed, and sorry to disturb you, but when you'll open them back, may I request chuuya with a so (do as u prefer for the pronouns) who's developing suicidal thoughts?

pls feel free to ignore if you're uncomfortable with it or if it's weird

i wish you a good day/night :)

hey bae, I saw this as a comfort req so I got to it as soon as I could. If you’re feeling this way, I’m really sorry. ily <33 ps. idk if you wanted a drabble or headcannons, so I went with the flow!

chuuya comforting his s/o who’s having suicidal thoughts

ft. chuuya x gn! reader

genre: comfort

warnings: suicidal thoughts, depressive themes (nothing too detailed)

depending on how you act, he wouldn’t exactly notice at first.

If you act happy and cheery on the outside by masking it, he won’t get the hint that quickly. but chuuya isn’t oblivious—he understands the little changes and really does notice them if he pays better attention.

now, if you show obvious signs of feeling suicidal, then he’ll immediately want to help. he’d start hearing you make even more self deprecating jokes than usual. he’d notice that everyday you look drained and can barely function properly without breaking down or taking moments to yourself.

he’s not sure how to exactly approach you—I mean, he had a partner who technically was known as a the suicidal maniac. but he hadn’t done much to help dazai so he’s determined to do better this time. In no possible way can he lose you.

so the next time he sees you do something out of the ordinary, he pulls you to the side and gently holds your arms.

“hey...are you okay?”

“what do you mean? I’m fine.”

he’d see you trying to laugh it off. but he knows better than to just let it go unnoticed. he’d gently grab your cheeks, making you look at him.

“you don’t have to tell me everything. whatever you’re going through...I’ll be here. no matter what, I’ll always be here.”

that’s really reassuring—but there’s one problem.

“I know chuuya...I know you’ll be here for me no matter what. but that’s not the issue...”

he’s confused now. he thought he had said the right thing. “huh? so what’s the problem?”

you looked tired and exhausted. “the problem is, I might not be here for much longer. I want to. but it’s so...exhausting.”

oh. that’s when it hits him. you don’t even have to explain because chuuya will wrap his arms around you, pulling you close to his chest.

your face will be buried in his neck, one of his hands slowly rubbing up and down your back. your bodies are pressed together, and the hug feels so nice you want to stay like this forever. for a spilt second, everything feels okay.

after that, chuuya would be more alert about what you do and say. he doesn’t wanna mess up and make you spiral.

he tries to keep you happy, even if it is just to make you smile. he’ll take you out (or stay in with you) whatever it is, he’ll stay by your side.

if you say stuff like “I love you chu...but I just don’t see the point in going on—“

he’ll stop your words, sit you down, and wrap an arm around your waist.

“listen here. I don’t know about you—but you have so many more things to do in life. so many more things to do with me. and I’m not letting you go. ever. you’re stuck with me, okay?”

he gets a little emotional, because he knows he can’t take away all your negative thoughts. but seeing the raw emotion in his eyes, the way his grip around your waist is tight—it’s enough to keep you here for now.

if you’re going over the edge, he’ll hug you closely to his chest with his arms wrapped around you. gently rocking the both of you back and forth, he’d mumble into your hair:

“I care. you’re here with me—and I care. I care, I care, I care. I care so much. I’ve never cared about someone this much before.”

“but this makes me a burden chu. you deserve so much bet—“

he doesn’t let you finish. “No—don’t start with that shit. we both still have so much to live for. I still have so many things I want to do. and I wanna do them with you. so hang on, okay? I’m here.”

he knows just saying “he’ll be here” won’t solve the big problem. he knows that deciding to live is something only the person themselves can decide. he’s not making you live for him, it’s quite the opposite.

when it’s night time, and the two of you are in bed with his arms gently wrapped around you, he’d mumble into your hair,

“I’m not saying you have to live for me. that’s the last thing I want you to do—I’m just saying...you deserve to feel the little things that give you comfort. it doesn’t have to be big—the little things can give you comfort. and you deserve, even the littlest things, love.”

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I apologize if you didn’t wanna be tagged in works regarding this theme, I know this isn’t what I usually post :)

[afriendlyblackhottie]

Tamed

Summary: Steve is tired of you being rude.

Pairings: Steve Rogers x Bratty!Black!Reader

Warnings: smut, Captain kink, dubcon, blowjob, rough sex, dirty talk, creampie

(A/N: I have writers block so I forced myself to finish this WIP. This is has been a WIP for a loooooong time like one of my first stories but I never finished it 😬. Like, follow, reblog 💜 ✌🏾)

Tagging: @titty-teetee @olyvoyl @donutloverxo @queenoftheworldisdead @zaddychris @harrysthiccthighss @thesecretlifeofdaydreamss (it wouldn’t let me tag you) @iam-laiya @hqneyyincc @liquorlaughslove @brattycherubwrites @mariahthelioness29

——————————————————————————

Steve was clearly irritated with you. The way you walked around the compound like you owned the place. How you'd almost fucked up the last mission because you acted like you couldn't listen to his direction. He couldn't help, but think about what would have happened if you'd gotten hurt worse than the few scrapes and bruises you'd ended up with. Being the tiny little thing you were, no more than five foot four you were easily breakable despite how tough you seemed.

Now you were walking around the compound like a pouty brat because you'd been officially benched for a few weeks. He'd ripped into you as soon as you'd gotten home and even though he didn't know it you stood in the shower washing all the dirt and blood on you with blood shot eyes because you'd rather die than admit that he hurt your feelings.

Since then you'd been giving him the silent treatment. When he talked you ignored him. When you felt really annoyed you'd leave the room if he was there. You'd proven you could handle yourself from the start and yet he still didn't trust you and it made you want to throw something at his stupid perfect face.

Except right now you two there the only ones home. It was probably the first time ever that it'd happened. Natasha, Sam, and Bucky were on a mission for once letting Steve have a week off. Wanda and Vision were away on some romantic getaway. Tony was doing business with Pepper. Rhodey had been deployed to Korea for a few months. Bruce was giving assistance to a village that was being ravaged by sickness. Thor was god knows where.

You'd been spending your days either watching bad reality shows, reading, working out, scrolling through Instagram and Twitter, chatting with your non-hero friends, or eating junk food that you'd normally be scolded about. All while acting like Steve wasn't there even though he was annoyingly around you.

You had on a pair of way too short booty shorts that made your ass peek out. When you'd gotten cold and instead of changing into pants you pulled on a pair of thigh high socks. You laid on your stomach with Love and Hip Hop Hollywood playing in the background even though you weren't paying attention, legs up and swaying back and forth.

He'd walked into the common room eyes narrowed as he zeroed into you. You rolled your eyes as soon as you felt his presence. "We need to talk," he pretty much demanded.

You didn't look up, still scrolling on your phone. "Mmmm," you hummed.

"Whatever your problem is this needs to stop," he said.

You bit your tongue before taking a deep breath. You liked a picture that a beauty guru had just posted. "Mhm."

"The games need to stop, Y/N- wait, are you listening to me?" He asked. His voice was sharp. Inside you actually wanted to run and hide, but you were kind of determined to keep up this whole charade.

"Yup," you popped before a yawned escaped from your lips.

He kissed his teeth, chuckling sarcastically before reaching over to snatch the pink device out of your hands.

"Hey!" You protested immediately turning over. "What the fuck!"

"Oh glad to have your attention now," he mocked.

"Give me my phone!" You demanded, standing up to grab it from the much taller man. He held it out of reach and you stood on your tippy toes to make an unsuccessful attempt.

He smirked, kind of enjoying seeing your struggle. "Listen and maybe I will."

You glared at him, plopping down on the couch as you crossed your arms. "You're such an asshole!"

"You know what?" He yanked you up by your arm with a bruisingly tight grip the force making you gasp.

"What the fu-"

"Shut up," his tone was demanding once again. "I'm tired of you walking around here like a fucking disrespectful brat."

As much as you loved to push his buttons, you'd never seem him like this. He rarely cussed. Never had he talked to you like this before. "And, you're being an asshole," you couldn''t stop yourself from saying.

"Maybe if you learned how to follow directions, I wouldn't have to do shit to put you in your place." He'd managed to grab both of your hands, holding onto them tightly. His other hand went to your neck, putting just enough pressure to let you know he meant business. “Wanna keep talking shit?”

It was unlike you to suddenly get so quiet as you bit your bottom lip. This didn’t go unnoticed by him as his eyes were immediately drawn to your mouth.

“So this is what you needed.” He kissed his teeth. “Needed me to put you in your fucking place, huh.”

You shook your head not being able to help yourself as you still made an attempt at defiance. Of course you fucking liked it. Part of the reason you liked to annoy him was because he was kind of cute when he was all riled up. You just weren’t expecting him to go this far.

He turned you around, his hold still around your neck as he let your arms fall. Your back was against his front pressed to his strong chest. Your ass against his now hardening dick. The friction felt so good. You were itching for him to rip your tiny shorts away so he could have his way with you. “Am I going to have to teach you how to be good to your Captain?”

You let out a small gasp then still shook your head once again. “No,” you blurted out. You just couldn’t help it. He brought out the best in you. That doesn’t mean you didn’t want him to fuck you up for it.

“No?” He pushed you forward to where your ass was sticking up in the air. “Are you trying to make it worse for yourself?”

“Steve-“

“Captain,” he cut you off to correct you, ripping your shorts down your legs like you’d wanted him to along with your panties. “You call me Captain when you speak to me until you learn some fucking manners.”

“I’m sorry,” you whimpered.

“Wait, what was that?” He teased as he started to rub your slit.

You didn’t reply instead trying to wrap your head around how he was touching you.

“I asked you to repeat yourself,” He said, his finger settling on his clit.

You licked your lips and tried to swallow your moaning. “I don’t remember.”

“Don’t fucking play with me right now,” he said smacking your ass so hard you knew you’d bruise.

“Captain!” You gasped.

It was like a whirlwind when he picked you up to throw you over his shoulder. You struggled against him, trying to wiggle away as he carried you off. None of it fazed him as you hit his muscular back. All he did was slap your ass your phone and ripped shorts went out of view. Fucking Steve. Those were your favorite pair.

He threw you on his bed, making you bounce up and then back down. “Ste- Captain,” you corrected yourself quickly, “why are you being such a, a-” you tried to find the right word.

“A what?” He snapped, grabbing you by your hair, daring you to finish.

“An asshole,” you finally said.

He grabbed your chin, squeezing your jaw before pulling away to slap your cheek. “Because you fucking deserve it.”

“Ow!” You whined. He ignored it as he forced you off the bed and onto your knees in front of him. Steve undid his pants, sliding them down his body. Your mouth dropped as his cock came into view. It was so long and thick and veiny. Of course even his dick would be perfect. “Holy fuck.”

He took advantage of your open mouth, putting the head on your lips fisting his hands into your hair again. “You gonna be a good cocksucker for me, Honey?” He grunted.

You moaned around him as you hallowed out your cheek. His language was still surprising to you, but you were still turned on like fuck. You pulled away from him quickly so you could take off your tank top, letting your tits fall free before sticking your tongue out so you could suck his dick again.

You tried taking him down your throat, but it wasn’t easy considering how big he was. Hell you had to open your mouth really wide to even take him in your mouth. How would was your poor pussy supposed to handle this. 

"I've been thinking about fucking your mouth for so long, Baby," he moaned as he put a hand on your cheek, smoothing his thumb over your cheek. You looked so perfect like this. Pouty lips around his dick as he fucked your throat, his balls hitting your chin, and your beautiful eyes watering. "You look so pretty with Daddy's cock in your mouth."

Who knew Steve Rogers had such a filthy mouth.

"Stop, Baby," he said, pulling his cock out of your mouth. Your lips were so swollen and cheeks puffy. "Finally you're being a good girl. C'mere." He helped you onto your feet before pecking your mouth. "Look at these pretty tits," he said, bringing his hands up to palm your mounds, tweaking your nipples between his fingers before laying a smack on each other. 

You yelped and tried to back away from him, only for him to grab your wrist again to spin you around. You were back to square one, but this time you were naked. 

"That's it, Baby. Look at that pretty little body. I'm gonna destroy that pretty pussy," he whispered in your ear and you keened. 

He walked you over to the bed and shoved you down so your ass was up in the air giving him total access to your cunt. He laid a smack on it before bringing his hands to your pussy again.

"You're soaking, Baby. You want me to fuck you, huh."

You didn't want to give him the satisfaction of admitting it to him, but yes. In the back of your mind you'd always wanted him. Always wanted him to take you. Dominate you. Fuck you into submission.

He was just now finally taking what he pretty much already owned. 

"Answer me, Y/N. Or else I'll make sure you don't get the chance to cum."

You moaned. "Yes."

"Yes what?" He asked, smacking your ass again.

And, again you let out a yelp. "Yes, I want you to fuck me." And that's when he entered you, full force from behind not even giving you a chance to adjust to his big dick. Your pussy was being forced to stretch around him. As much as it hurt, as much as it felt like you were being violated, you fucking loved it. 

You pressed your face into the mattress letting out a moan into it. "You're gonna act like a bitch, I'm gonna fuck you like one," he grunted. The grip on your ass was bruising. You'd be all kinds of marked up in the morning.

“Captain,” you moaned as he stuffed himself inside of you.

His dick was hitting that spot inside of you. It was driving you crazy. He looked down seeing himself go into you and the way your tight cunt still hugged his dick as he pulled out. It left his creamy wetness on his cock. “Fuck,” he moaned under his breath. “God, that’s such a pretty sight to see. I could take a picture.”

All of that with the way you were moaning for him. Those cute whimpers that kept coming up through your throat. Maybe next time you could make a little movie so he could play it back later.

“See, little girls like you talk all that shit and can’t even take a dick. So pathetic.”

“Yes, Captain,” you cried out. “Yes. Fuck me.” It hurt so good the way he was doing you. The grip he had on your ass and the way he was forcing you to take every single thick inch. He was rutting into you like he had something to teach you and you had definitely learned your lesson. “I’m gonna cum,” you whined. “I’m gonna... I’m, I’m, I’m...”

“Already? Couldn’t even handle it a little bit?”

“Yes!” You screamed into the pillow. “Yes. Yes. Yesyesyesyesyes!” You came undone around him for the first time. Eyes rolling into the back of your head, body going stiff. It felt like every sense had been intensified. He didn’t stop. Keeping up his pace because he wasn’t ready. He needed to make sure he left you all fucked out. Needed to show you who was boss.

“See, that’s such a good girl. Cumming all for your Captain,” he said, grabbing your hair as your pussy tightened around him. It kept going like that for a few thrusts because he was trying to leave you sore and bruised before finally pulling out of you so he could push you onto your back.

He didn’t even give you a chance to react as he entered you again. “Captain!” You were to the point where actual tears were coming down your face. Not that it was going to stop him. Being a whiney little baby wasn’t going to get you anywhere with him. “I’ll be good!”

“That’s right,” he said. “I know you fucking will.”

“I’m sorry for being such a brat,” you sobbed as your body didn’t stop convulsing. He held your legs by your thighs.

“Don’t you ever, ever question my authority ever again.” He was pounding you so good with no mercy. He was so deep you could feel him in your stomach yet your pussy couldn’t get enough.

“I know I’m sorry. I’m so sorry, Captain.” You sobbed as you tried to take what he was giving you, but it was starting to be too much.

“See that’s better,” he said not stopping as he fucked you hard. “Isn’t that better?”

You nodded feeling yourself on the verge of another orgasm. Your stomach tightening as he had you feeling like you were bent in half. How the fuck were you supposed to come back from this. There was no way you were letting another man fuck you ever again. No one would be able to fuck you this hard and rough.

He put one of your legs over his shoulder so he could somehow get deeper. You should have known that Steve Rogers would be a perfectionist even when he was hate fucking you. Yet you didn’t want him to ever stop.

“I’m fucking cumming.” You squealed.

“Now you can’t stop cumming on my dick,” he grunted. “Should have fucked the brat out of you forever ago.”

“Yes, Captain, yes,” you cried as you squirted around him. “Fuck, yes.” Your mouth dropped open. The look of desperation and ecstasy was only making him want to fully make you his. Made him want to cum in your tight cunt. Made him want to cum so deep inside of you.

Fuck it he wasn’t going to hold back. He grabbed your hair holding it tight as he finally started to unload inside of you. Wanting to give you every single drop of his white hot seed.

“Gonna cum so deep in this pussy,” he couldn’t stop himself as he rammed so deep inside of you, stilling so he could make sure you felt every inch. The feeling of him flooding your pussy made you tighten around him, gripping his dick like a vice. “Fuck!”

“Yes, Captain!” You raked your nails on his back as his hips stuttered into you before slumping on top of you.

Your heart was pounding in your chest as you wrapped your arms around his neck. He took a deep breath as he looked up at you. Surprising the both of you by kissing your lips.

He rolled off of you, pulling you into his arms. “Fuck, I’m sorry. I don’t know what came over me.”

“No. Don’t say sorry.” You shook your head wincing at how tender you felt. “I’m sorry for being a bitch.”

“It’s okay.” He chuckled. “I’m just not used to being talked back to. I actually kind of liked it. That’s why I went so crazy.”

You smirked. “Well, Captain, I can keep doing what I was doing.”

“Don’t push your luck. Or next time I might not be so nice.”

[equestrianwritingsstuff]

If you're free can you please do Fugitives part 3? 🥺 ik you posted it just a while ago, BUT IT'S SO GOOD😭 can't wait till Villian is healed up again!! 😭

Thank you so much for the ask!

Fugitives Part 3

Part 1, Part 2

@teheranb I didn't know if you wanted to be tagged in this continuation or not.

I apologize this is shorter than normal, but I liked how it ended.

Warnings: exhaustion, lack of trust, malnourished, fatigue, forced loss of consciousness

~

After only a second, Villain's breaths quickened, but he did not wake. Some color returned to his pale face, but that was it.

"Who are you?" Hero asked, protectively wrapping her body around Villain's with a glare to her face.

"The person who is saving you," the masked stranger grumbled in reply, positioning himself to lift Villain off the cave's cold floor.

"No!" Hero exclaimed, pressing her hand against Villain's chest in a sporadic attempt to keep him close to her. "Don't touch him."

"He needs medical assistance, that serum won't heal him," the stranger said, taking Hero's hand and easily placing it at her side. She bristled, preparing to lash out, but the man held her weakened body back.

"Don't exert yourself," he instructed. "We still have a ways to walk."

"Don't touch him," Hero growled. She knew that she wasn't being reasonable. She knew that the stranger was just trying to help, but maybe she was just overly protective of Villain to the point of not letting even good people touch him.

"I have to," the stranger pointed out. "We need to move and you are barely strong enough to walk yourself."

The man was right. Hero knew this, but it was still uneasy. Therefore, she picked the upper half of his limp form up and laid it closer to her. The stranger sighed, rubbing his mask.

"Listen," he said. "I'm trying to be reasonable. Let me help you."

Hero pressed her cheek into Villain's neck, throwing her legs over Villain's knees. She could feel Villain's chest falling and rising against her's and took comfort in it.

"Don't hurt him," Hero whimpered, tears pricking at her eyes.

"I won't, I won't, I promise," the stranger replied.

"What if you're a hero?" Hero whined pathetically. "Going to kill us?"

"I'm not a hero!" The stranger was on his hands and knees now, desperation vividly apparent. "Let me help you."

Hero shook her head. She couldn't let this man hurt Villain.

"Relax," the stranger murmured. "Let me help you. Let me help him."

Hero shook her head.

"Relax."

Another shake.

"Then I am sorry about this," the stranger apologized. Hero just had a brief moment of thought before two hands encassed her head, the word "sleep" uttered, and then all went black.

Hero awoke to the soft crackling of a nearby firestove. She groaned, body aching and incredibly tired, but she felt more rested and peaceful than ever. She started to roll onto her side to get a couple more minutes of sleep, but her eyes shot open instead.

Villain. The stranger. Villain and the stranger.

Hero rolled back over, nearly falling of the cot she was laid upon, and looked hurriedly around.

A fireplace was in the corner, fueled by a moderately stocked pile of wood, with a large stone in front of it. There were woven mats of ivy and sticks in a diamond shape- giving the table four- laid upon the smooth surface.

And in front of the fire, on a cot, laid Villain.

Hero jumped off of the cot, ignoring how her legs immediately turned to jelly and how her vision turned into pins of black, and stumbled over to Villain. She bumped into the oddly placed stone on her way over and was more than thankful when her knees buckled next to Villain.

She didn't say anything, just laid her head on his chest and closed her eyes. Sleep was coming near, but one thought infiltrated her hazy mind.

The stranger would be coming.

But still, sleep took her back under and all those thoughts washed away.

When Hero came to once again, she almost instantly came to the conclusion that she was not reclining against Villain anymore. With an experimental tap to the hard, but comfortable, block below her, she knew that she was back on the cot.

"Villain?" She whimpered, feeling around aimlessly for any signs of her companion, but found none. He was gone, and she didn't have the strength nor the resolve to open her eyes and look for him.

"Good you're awake."

That brought her out of her exhausted bindings.

Hero's eyes snapped open, darting to the figure looming above her. He was familiar even though he didn't have a mask on.

"You're a hero!" She gasped, pulling away. "You-you made me sleep. You're powered, unless you're a villain... oh don't hurt me. Don't hurt him. Please I'm begging you, just leave us alone. Just... just..." Hero trailed off as she felt her head nod, head feeling fuzzy. She was so tired and hungry.

"Shh, shh, shh," the stranger whispered. "Stop that. Rest, okay? You need it. Villain is in good hands, I assure you."

"No, no, no," Hero crunched her forehead. "He isn't. He is going to be arrested and tortured and experimented on. Leave him alone, please. Let me have him... have him, see him."

Hero knew her pleas were that of pure nonsense.

"You want to see him? You can. Okay? Just here, let me help you," the stranger's arms wrapped around her body.

Hero flinched, a miniscule protest against the gesture. She wouldn't let him carry her. Not to the other heroes to dispose of her.

"Let me help you."

"No," Hero growled, eyeing the stranger with angled eyes. "Never."

The stranger backed up, opening his arms in an invitation to walk herself. Hero accepted it, rotating both legs off the bed and pushing up...

She landed in the strangers arms, one wrapping around her back as the other hugged her torso.

"Let me go!" Hero snarled, legs splaying outwards. "Now!"

"Don't you want to see Villain."

"I don't want you touching me, hero."

The stranger was silent as he hauled Hero back into the cot. "Okay then lay here and I will bring Villain to you."

"No! Carry me, carry me to him. Just don't touch him."

The stranger smiled wryly and picked Hero up in a bridal carry. She briefly registered the strength of his biceps, but quickly dismissed that discovery.

The stranger led her back to the fireplace, and helped her to the ground. Villain still slept there, but something was different about him.

His shirt was stripped off, allowing the two bullet wounds to be exposed to the air around him. His ribs protruded out of his skin as his torso sunk in. He was heavily malnourished, and being sick and hurt did nothing more than speed of the process of utter starvation.

His face was still ghostly pale, but Hero couldn't tell if it was better or worse than their time spent in the cave. Two blotches of red sat high on his cheekbones as sweat gathered under his eyes and around his hairline.

"He looks horrible," Hero commented, leaning against the cot. She sat on her knees, but those soon gave out, and she was sitting completely on the ground.

"You don't look much better," the stranger took a place across from Hero, his back towards the fire.

Hero didn't reply and ran a finger over Villain's cheek. His eyelids fluttered before opening, gazing at Hero with a clouded gaze.

"Heh-heh," he wheezed, reaching towards her weakly.

"Villain?" Hero's voice was elevated into a high octave as tears threatened to spill. She grabbed his hand and rubbed it tenderly.

Villain's eyes started to drift shut again as a smile formed on his lips.

"I'm tired," he mumbled drowsily, eyes once again cracking open.

"Me too," Hero said. "Me too."

She closed her eyes and scooted herself so that her head rested on the mattress, needing Villain's closeness. Villain seemed to desire it as well, as he curled himself towards her body.

Hero barely heard the stranger stand up as he left, but did feel the softness of a blanket as it was draped across her body.

"My name is Vigilante," the stranger whispered as Hero snuggled into the blanket. "Sleep tight."

[firelxdykatara]

gods, ok, apparently i’m not done.

atla fandom? we need to have a chat.

(....ok that made me sound pretentious as fuck. and maybe i am, but this needs to be said, cause i’m getting....real, real tired of a Certain Corner of this fandom and as a result, this is gonna be a discourse-heavy post so feel free to scroll past if that’s not your bag. as always, my salt posts all carry the catch-all #salt for ts tag, which you’re free to blacklist/filter at your leisure. i’m Very Annoyed at the moment, which will probably come through in the following post, so just. yknow. be prepared for that. or ignore it, that’s perfectly valid too.)

under a cut bc i do care for my followers and their sanity i swear lmao

there’s a real serious issue in this fandom with not understanding what queer terminology actually means or implies, especially when applied to a fictional narrative.

i’m specifically talking about ‘coding’, here. (if i were in a more meme-y mood, i might have said ‘the atla fandom found out about the term “gay-coding” and haven’t shut up since’.)

to the people who say ‘zuko is gay-coded’, i have this to say: you keep using that word. i do not think it means what you think it means. because he isn’t. i’m sorry, but he’s not! and the fact that this is such a prevalent claim in this fandom is distressing, bc it says to me that none of y’all know what gay-coding is or when and how to apply it! please, i’m begging you, go and look up these terms and what they mean and when they should be used before actually trying to plug them into your critical analysis, because when you misuse them and then call other people delusional for disagreeing with you it casts a pall over the entire fandom and is, i think, the root of some of the worst toxicity this fandom has to offer.

and the thing is, there are cases where gay-coding would apply--for instance, a couple series that are famous for queerbaiting their audience by coding their main characters as being attracted to one another (sometimes even despite their openly stated sexualities) come to mind, but those shows bare no similarities at all to atla and how zuko was written and portrayed! (and it would be funny, if it weren’t so obnoxious and infuriatingly wide-spread throughout the fandom, because the only queer couple we actually seen on-screen in either show wasn’t even queer-coded in any respect, and they’re canonically bi! [yes, i’m shading korrasami, or more accurately i’m shading bryke for refusing to give ka the build-up and development they deserved].)

this absolutely isn’t to say that headcanoning zuko as gay is a bad thing or invalid in any respect. (although the tendency for zukka shippers to do this specifically to keep zuko away from katara and/or invalidate his canon relationship/attraction to girls is more than a little eyebrow raising. especially since sokka is usually allowed to be bi, bc fans have no problem letting sukka stay in the background bc it’s no real threat, while jetko shippers are happy to have both boys be bi. [possibly bc katara is less a threat to jetko bc jetkotara is every bit as valid as any single ship between the three, but zukka can’t exactly let katara join in, and if the potential exists for zuko to be attracted to her then canon giving them the far deeper emotional bond becomes a threat to zukka’s existence? idk for sure--you be the judge.]) i prefer to hc zuko as bi (and always have, long before the atla renaissance), bc i don’t think zuko being attracted to boys is outside the realm of possibility, and it isn’t a threat to my ship since zuko&katara had a deep and emotional bond in canon that is very easy to develop further into something that becomes explicitly romantic--but the headcanon itself isn’t really the problem (although what it’s often in service to can be).

it’s the strange insistence that this is the only way to read his character, bc he was coded that way and so anyone who doesn’t see it must be too straight to understand--and i really shouldn’t have to say why and how that is so incredibly fucking insulting. (the ‘hetero lenses’ comment wasn’t cute when it came from bryke six years ago, and the same sentiment being repackaged and delivered by zukka shippers ain’t cute now.)

calling zuko gay-coded not only demonstrates ignorance as to what the term actually means, and how to usefully apply it in critical analysis, but also validates the frankly bullshit insertion of institutionalized homophobia in the world of atla where it was neither needed, nor wanted, nor ever hinted at in canon. as a queer woman i’m still infuriated by one fucking comic panel shoving institutionalized and systemic homophobia into a world where it was entirely unnecessary (and doing this in the first installment of the franchise showcasing a queer relationship??? making korra and asami worried about ‘coming out’ when they could have just gone on to have cute adventures together and tell people ‘hey we’re dating’ and have everyone else be ‘that’s awesome =DDD’ [because it is, in fact, possible to just have a world without homophobia i promise!!!!!] double yikes, i’m still pissed at bryke about it), and i doubly hate that ‘zuko is gay coded’ has become so widespread that ‘ozai hates him bc he’s gay’ has become a staple in that part of the fandom.

not only does making zuko gay and implying (or outright stating) that ozai hated and abused him because of it completely undermine zuko’s character arc by making his abuse about his sexuality rather than ozai’s toxic pride and anger at seeing himself reflected in his ‘weak’ son, but it comes very close to outright stating that abuse and trauma are inherently gay experiences, and they aren’t!!! they really aren’t, i promise!!!

abuse and trauma narratives exist outside of ‘my dad hates me because i’m gay’. and, quite frankly, there are MORE THAN ENOUGH queer trauma narratives out in the world. we do not need to start trying to retroactively make them canon in a series where they didn’t exist! if you’re gay and see yourself in zuko and project your own experiences on him, that’s understandable and valid. that does not make zuko gay-coded. and honestly, the insistence that he is makes very little sense to me, because you’re essentially trying to give the show credit for work you put into interpreting the characters! why would you want to do that? why not own your own headcanons and take credit for them, rather than insisting they are canon and everyone else is wrong for not seeing them??? like, i’ve said before that i’ve always headcanoned zuko (and katara) as bi, and even support it with my interpretations of evidence from the show, but the difference between ‘i think zuko is bi’ and ‘zuko is definitely gay-coded’ is that i know that bi zuko is my interpretation of canon, and that it is work i’m putting into the show that wasn’t actually intended by the creators/writers, no matter how much sexual tension i read into the jetko swordfight.

and like, zuko’s character arc doesn’t actually parallel a queer one all that well to begin with. it’s easy enough to do the work and twist it sideways just enough to make the general points fit, but the fact is, zuko’s arc is not one of self-discovery. it’s not one of coming to understand something fundamental about himself that he can’t change, that he was hated for, and coming out to his father in a dramatic confrontation where he shows that he understands himself and doesn’t need his father’s acceptance to be fulfilled.

zuko’s arc is actually one of trauma and healing. and those can (and often are--like i said, there are more than enough queer trauma narratives in the world, atla really doesn’t need to be one of them) be part of queer narratives, for sure! but they aren’t uniquely queer. and zuko’s confrontation with ozai during the eclipse doesn’t read like a ‘coming out’ at all. (yes, i’ve seen that post. yes, i rolled my eyes and moved on, bc unlike some people, i’m capable of not clowning on correctly tagged posts i disagree with.) zuko is specifically confronting ozai over his abuse, because his arc wasn’t about discovering anything fundamental about himself (and therefore realizing that ozai was hating him for something he couldn’t change)--it was about realizing that he was not at fault for the way his father treated him. it was also about realizing that the fire nation was broken and corrupt at its core, and that his father was an aspect of that he needed to break away from so that he could help the world begin to heal.

he says it himself:

Zuko: No, I've learned everything! And I've had to learn it on my own! Growing up, we were taught that the Fire Nation was the greatest civilization in history. And somehow, the War was our way of sharing our greatness with the rest of the world. What an amazing lie that was. The people of the world are terrified by the Fire Nation. They don't see our greatness. They hate us! And we deserve it! We've created an era of fear in the world. And if we don't want the world to destroy itself, we need to replace it with an era of peace and kindness.

making this about zuko being gay and rejecting ozai’s homophobia, rather than zuko learning fundamental truths about the world and about his home and about how there was something deeply wrong with his nation that needed to be fixed in order for the world to heal (and, no, ‘homophobia’ is not the answer to ‘what is wrong with the fire nation’, i’m still fucking pissed at bryke about that), misses the entire point of his character arc. this is the culmination of zuko realizing that he should never have had to earn his father’s love, because that should have been unconditional from the start. this is zuko realizing that he was not at fault for his father’s abuse--that speaking out of turn in a war meeting in no way justified fighting a duel with a child.

is that first realization (that a parent’s love should be unconditional, and if it isn’t, then that is the parent’s fault and not the child’s) something that queer kids in homophobic households/families can relate to? of course it is. but it’s also something that every other abused kid, straight kids and even queer kids who were abused for other reasons before they even knew they were anything other than cishet, can relate to as well. in that respect, it is not a uniquely queer experience, nor is it a uniquely queer story, and zuko not being attracted to girls (which is what a lot of it seems to boil down to, at the end of the day--cutting down zuko’s potential ships so that only zukka and a few far more niche ships are left standing) is not necessary to his character arc. nor does it particularly make sense.

(and before anyone brings up his date with jin--a) he enjoyed it when she kissed him, and b) he was a traumatized, abused child going out on a first date. of course he was fucking awkward. have you ever met a teenage boy????)

anyway, uh, that was a lot of words, so have a tl;dr: zuko is not gay-coded. there is nothing uniquely gay (or even uniquely queer) about his character arc or characterization, and he was certainly not coded gay in an attempt to sneak a queer character past the censors. if anyone involved with atla was gonna try that, it would’ve been in lok, and as established, they didn’t even manage to queer-code the actual queer relationship before the last few minutes of the final episode. headcanoning zuko as gay is absolutely fine (though if it’s only done to keep him away from female characters he may otherwise be attracted to, that smells more like misogyny than anything else), but insisting that this reading is the only one that makes sense, and anyone who doesn’t agree must be straight (hello, queer woman here making this insanely long thinkpiece) is very much not.

ship what you like, but stop trying to invalidate other ships and other interpretations of characters just to make your ship seem more plausible. it’s really not a good look.

[thesmokingguns]

Bad Day, Worse Night

Word Count: 2051

Summary: You’re having a bad day and just want to come home and stay in bed all night but your boyfriend is on a mission to cheer you up and turn your bad day into a good night. But he doesn’t have the best of luck. 

A/N: I wasn’t going to post today after dropping a bunch of stuff yesterday but kind of like writing Kelly Nickels so I had to write this piece today. I know you’re all probably getting tired of this but I want to thank everyone for engaging in the posts. Let me know if there are any characters you prefer me writing for or if you want something more specific please feel free to request HERE. Thanks everyone!

Tag List: @thenobodies-inc​ , @littlemisscare-all​ , @that-80s-chick​ @ayablackwood

It’s not letting me tag the following people. Please check your settings on Tumblr, thank you!

@agroupiewhore , @ayablackwood

Part One: Bad Day

The door burst open with a crash so loud Kelly looked up from the couch where he was picking at his bass. When the door slammed shut with a louder slam, his eyebrow shot up. You stormed past him into the bedroom slamming another door making the beer he had on the table shake from the force. If he didn’t reach out it would have spilled all over the coffee table.

“Love, by slamming the doors are you trying to tell me something?” He called from the couch. Instead of a response he heard muffled screaming coming from the room. “Take that as a yes.” He muttered to himself as he moved to the bedroom, opening the door that was just slammed.

“Go away.” You mumbled into the pillow. Kelly sat down beside you on the bed, pushing your hair behind your ear. You were so mad about the day that you had at work and just needed to calm down.

It had been one of those days where if it could go wrong it had. Everyone had been screaming at you all day, from customers to the manager it seemed everyone had a bone to pick with you. It felt like you had gone through a boxing match with your emotions and you were holding on by a tiny string. A string that was frazzled, tired, and ready to break at the slightest provocation.

“Do you want to talk about it?” He asked, rubbing your back. You shifted, laying your head on his lap, his fingers working through your hair. His touch calming you down and make you take a mental step back from the ledge you were about to fall off of.

“I hate the world.” You muttered curling into him and sighing out a deep breath. You heard your boyfriend scoff at this.

“How can you hate the world when I am your world?” Kelly countered. The smile tugging at your lips let him know that he was on the right track to putting you in a good mood. “We can’t go about wallowing in misery. The first option is we go take a bath, drink whiskey, invite some people over and have a party or you can get dolled up and I’ll take you out so that you don’t retreat into yourself like a hermit.” You thought for a second about his offer. Not really wanting to be around anyone.

“I pick C. I stay here in my moody bubble and wallow in my self pity feeling sorry for myself.” You told him, kicking off your heels and reaching for the blanket so you could stay in bed all day. He stood up, letting your head fall to the place he was just sitting and a whiny sound came out of your mouth. “Kelly, come back and rub my hair. That was so nice.” You propped your head up on your hands, looking as he opened the closet door, flipping through some hangers.

“Here. Get dressed.” He threw you a dress that you recognized, it was one of his favorites, smirking as you hit your head against the mattress. “Hey, Y/N stop being dramatic.” You threw a pillow at him as he left wishing it was a lamp and could do more damage. You’d show him dramatic if he wanted to be like that.

Kelly had picked out a short silky dress for you that was skin tight and showed off all the parts of you that he liked to touch. Instead of giving him the satisfaction of being a little sleaze doll for him you pulled on a pair of combat boots and grabbed your leather jacket. You were going to be as comfortable as possible.

“I’m going to get so drunk you’re going to have to carry me home or bail me out of jail. It will be a fun game of which one happens first” You warned, watching the way that he smirked at you. His arm wrapped around your waist pulling you to him and planting a kiss on your lips. The feeling of his lips melting some of your anger.

“Will you get drunk enough to let me take you out to the alley?” He flirted his hand sliding down your curves to your bare thighs and back up trying to creep back up. You smacked his hand away shaking your head annoyed. He always had a one track mind.

“Get your mind out of the gutter, Kels.” You shook your head taking a step away from him and trying on one of his hats that were hanging by the front door. Thinking of how he had mentioned the alley you thought of how to change his mind to staying in and letting you wallow, “You know, whenever you’re in a bad mood-“

“I’m a ray of fucking sunshine. I’m never in a bad mood.” He interrupted earning him a glare from you as he took the hat off your head and put it on his own head.

“Ray of fucking sunshine, my ass.” You snorted. But your mind was on how you wanted to stay home. Maybe order a pizza and eat it in the bathtub or eat it well crying on the couch watching a movie. Maybe you could convince him to stay home with you if you played your cards right and used his weakness against him..

Taking a step forward you ran a finger down his chest, making sure you kept eye contact and held his attention. You let your tongue slip out wetting your bottom lip, watching his eyes follow the simple motion. You let your arms slip around his neck pushing your body into his, loving how he couldn’t stop his hands from skimming your body.

“When you’re in a bad mood I always cheer you up by going down on my knees. Maybe you can return the favor?” You asked, batting your eyelashes. He definitely was reconsidering going out now. You could see the hesitation to move as he tried to process what you were saying to him.

“Giving me a blowjob will cheer you up?” He asked, tilting his head slightly. “Because if that’s the case we have plenty of time to-“ you threw up your hands shaking your head as you took a step away from him.

“Let’s just go.” You said moving to open the door. Kelly slid his arm around you, practically dragging you outside and into the fading sunshine. Part of you wondered if you should ask where you were going, the other part was just hoping there would be drinks. The sooner you left the sooner you could go home.

Part Two: Bad Night

It had been about two hours since you had been dragged out of your apartment after having a miserable day at work. Your head was throbbing and you were thinking about how you could be wrapped in blankets on the couch watching the VHS of Beetlejuice you had bought last week. Maybe be halfway through a pizza and on your second bottle of wine.

Instead you were at The Roxy, packed in the upstairs bar where people kept bumping into you and where you had lost Kelly at least a half hour before when he had gone to the bathroom. You had managed to get drunk but instead of bringing out the laughter and dancing that your boyfriend had been hoping it would bring out you were just getting more upset.

You slammed back another shot of whiskey, tapping two fingers on the bar to signal you needed another. If Kelly didn’t appear after the next shot you were going to go home. You felt like you were on the brink of tears. They were burning, ready to fall if you could just get back home. The overwhelming feeling of a bad day setting you on the path for the worst mood to break open.

“Hey beautiful, are you here alone?”

“Fuck off.” You didn’t even bother to look at the man who had slid into the free spot next to you. You were not in the mood to have strangers talk to you or flirt with you.

“Aw, why are you being rude to me? Bad night?” You slammed back the last shot. Time to go. Standing up, ignoring the man you felt the hand on your arm. You turned expecting to see Kelly but some stranger was holding onto you. It had been a bad day and now a bad night. You slammed your head forward headbutting the guy who had tried to talk to you at the bar. He broke contact with you, you could feel his blood drip onto you as you turned to walk out of the club, your body shaking in annoyance.

Bad day turns into a bad night, who saw that one coming? You lit a cigarette, sucking on the filter and sighing out a cloud of smoke. You just wanted to get home and into your bed, away from everyone. You were mad at Kelly for dragging you out and vanishing. You were mad about work. You were mad about that fucking weird guy grabbing you at the bar. You were mad that you were… crying.

The stream of tears coming out, burning as your mascara poured down your face.  Wiping furiously with the leather sleeve of your jacket, you depended on muscle memory to get you home. It was aggravating to be so upset and crying because of it. Pushing open the door to a dark apartment you headed straight into the bathroom, filling the claw foot tub with hot water. You needed to wash off this day and have a little bit of a fresh start.

Kelly threw the front door open, eyes wild as he looked around the apartment. A glow from the bathroom had him nearly sprinting across the apartment opening the door and freezing when he saw you. Your hair was pulled up, face a mess of mascara lines from tears and someone else’s blood, a bruise from where your head met a face, naked with an arm crossed over your breasts, the other arm resting in it and holding a cigarette.

“What the fuck?” Kelly rushed towards the tub. His hands checking you for any other injury, “Where are you bleeding from? Are you okay?” He was touching you everywhere but you were so numb, everything overwhelming you that it was like you were outside your body watching it happen. “Y/N? Y/N, please, say something.” Your eyes snapped up watching him, the concern for you swimming in his eyes.

“Who goes to the bathroom for a half hour?” The guilty look he gave you had you shaking your head, taking a drag of your cigarette, “Just leave me alone. It’s been a bad 24 hours.” You drew your legs up, resting your chin on your knees.

But leaving you alone was the last thing he planned on doing. Kelly was stripping, easing himself behind you in the tub. His arms wrapping around you and dragging you back against him. He grabbed a washcloth filling it in the water before starting to wipe the makeup and blood from your face. With each gentle movement of the washcloth you could feel your bad day starting to fade. The way Kelly rubbed your shoulders, kissing them after they were clean started to crack your anger.

“How are you, Love? Any better?” His hands tucking a strand of hair away from your face. His fingers feeling like they were soft kisses on your skin.

“I’m still a little grumpy.” You admitted.

“Well you’re always a little bit grumpy so that seems fine. As long as you’re back to your normal amount.” Sinking back against him, you felt thankful for him being here with you. This is exactly what you had needed.

“Hey Kelly, I love you.”

“I love you more. Sorry for doing coke in the bathroom.” You rolled your eyes at his confession snuggling into his arms. The way he was stroking you arms and laying kisses on the back of your neck made you aware it might have been a bad day but Kelly wasn’t going to let you go to bed in a bad mood.

[alirhi]

Loki ranting

Okay. I had this thought in my head of like just compiling links of all the Loki shit I've posted/reblogged so far so that when I get into a conversation about the show and how it fucking disgusted me, I can just be like "here. here's this masterlist post, go read all this shit. This is my entire argument, and not only mine, but a lot of stuff posted by people far more intelligent and level-headed and eloquent than I am, whom I happen to agree with." Because the alternative is constantly getting fired up all over again, and that is exhausting.

BUT! I'm stupid and don't know how tumblr works. Apparently I can't just be like "give me all the Loki-tagged shit I've got" I can only search all the Loki-tagged shit on all of tumblr. And I'm not scrolling back through all of my posts. I talk too fucking much for that shit 😂

So, I'll try to remember all of my grievances with how the MCU has treated Loki, and all of the excellent posts made by other, equally upset fans, and put it all together here under this nice, neat little cut for everyone else's sanity and scrolling convenience...

For people who actually read my shit fairly regularly - bless you, you crazy, patient people. I love you! - this is going to be a lot of repetition of shit you've already read. Probably at least twice. I'm passionate and I have a terrible memory lol. Sorry.

Anyway, first, for those who don't know me and haven't been following my explosions of rage for the past couple of months, some quick background: I do not read comic books, so Loki's Marvel comic canon means nothing to me. I know almost nothing about it. The reason I'm so in love with the character in the MCU is because I am an eclectic witch and the deity I've actively loved and worshiped the longest in my life (literally for as long as I can remember) is Loki. So when he was mentioned in The Mask, I squeed. When they named Matt Damon's character after him in Dogma, I cheered.

When Thor came out in 2011, I just about died from happiness. I was hungry for any representation of this underappreciated god, no matter what it was. I didn't even bitch about how underpowered he was, because at least he was there. But I'm getting slightly ahead of myself.

I can hear anyone reading this going "Why Loki? Isn't he, like, evil? Like basically the Norse version of The Devil?" Because I heard all this shit irl all the fucking time. And no. So let me give you a quick rundown of who Loki actually is.

Loki is a Trickster God. He's often referred to as the God of Mischief. He is not and never was evil, simply chaotic and hedonistic. Loki Laufeyjarson was the son of Laufey (that's mama; they changed her to a man for some reason in the movie) and Fárbauti. Right from the start, from his name, we get a sign of how Loki goes against traditional norms of the time, because in Norse culture, families were patrilineal, and surnames were "son/daughter of father" (which would have made him Loki Fárbautitason), not the mother. But Loki's surname is matrilineal. Feminist icon woo! lol

Though he's a Jotunn, Loki is counted among the Gods (Aesir) in Norse tradition. Depending on his mood, he is alternately helpful or disruptive to the other Gods. I'm not gonna sit and teach a whole text class on him lol but I'll use my favorite example of Misunderstood Loki - the conception of Sleipnir!

So, get this shit. This is also part of why I DO NOT follow Odin and never fucking will (a very small part, but still part of the reason). So, the other Norse Gods are petty motherfuckers, and they wanted some shit built but didn't want to pay the dude doing the building. So they were like "okay, if you can get it done in X amount of time, we'll pay you, but if you can't manage it NO MATTER WHAT, this whole thing is free." And they made sure he had NO help, nothing but him, his materials, and his Very Good Horsey. And this guy and his horse were fucking BAMFs. So it was looking like he was definitely gonna get it done in time, and Odin was like "nah, fuck that shit. I'm cheap." and so he sent Loki to distract the work horse. Loki transformed into a mare and lured the horse away, got fucked, got pregnant, gave birth to the 8-legged (for some reason) horse Sleipnir. Odin rides Loki's son into battle. Um. Kay.

So Loki helped Odin be a petty mf, and Odin got himself a new pet out of the deal.

Oh, also, because he's smart af and a shapeshifter and a master magician and genderfluid, Loki "fails" to fit the super fucking toxic and narrow Norse/Aesir view of "a real man". He prefers intelligence and manipulation to solve problems rather than violence, he's not afraid to behave like a clown if it gets shit done, and that grosses the Aesir out, so they constantly ridicule him for being "less than a man".

Loki is the God of the outcast and the misunderstood. The marginalized people from all walks of life. He is the God of the LGBT community. In modern terms, he's pansexual, polyamorous (married to Sigyn and they are deeply in love, but boy gets around and I've never seen any indication that Sigyn gives a shit) and genderfluid.

Okay. Focus, Ali. This is part of why I usually post multiple rants instead of one big long one XD The longer I ramble, the more I get sidetracked and forget the original point.

So. Loki's awesome, and being a Trickster, is powerful as all fucking hell. There's not much he can't do.

And now we come to Thor (the movie, not the deity). Loki's there! 24-year-old Ali is spazzing! All is right with the world!

Oh lord, they've actually done him justice?! Amazing! He's complex and nuanced and emotional, just like the real Loki! I loved this movie. Loved. It. The climactic thing with trying to blow up Jotunheim never really made much sense to me until someone made an excellent point the other day about Loki being raised in a racist society that was racist against his own race, he just didn't know it yet, poor child. Baby Thor was never corrected when he pledged to commit mass genocide, so Baby Loki probably absorbed the lesson then that Jotunns=evil and killing them all will win his father's love. Anyway, 2011 Loki was a beautiful, heartbreaking portrayal of the God I've loved all my life and spent 24 years longing to see depicted on the big screen.

Then The Avengers happened. And I saw another Loki very close to Norse mythology - mainly, how he's treated. In the beginning of the movie, he's sick, exhausted, and in pain. He can hardly stand, he stumbles and needs help when he walks. He was very obviously tortured, and the sickly blue light of the scepter's control is in his eyes. That gets less and less pronounced as the movie goes on, showing Loki working his way free of it, but in the beginning, he's a mess. Because he was tortured and used by Thanos. Marvel directly confirmed this, and that he was under the scepter's/Mind Stone's control. Loki's actions are not his own in The Avengers. He's under both threat and Thanos' direct control. The movie actually shows The Other directly threatening him to keep him on task, because this is not Loki's plan. It is not what he wants. He's being used and villainized... Just like in real life. It hurt to see this done to him, but the accuracy was too beautiful to ignore.

Thor: The Dark World comes out. I've heard people complain that this movie is the weak link in the Thor trilogy. I disagree. I think that's Ragnarok, for a bunch of reasons, but we'll get there. (And for the record, I loved Ragnarok, too. It was a funny movie. Infinity War and the Disney+ series are the only portrayals of Loki in the MCU that I truly fucking hated.) Anyway, good, fun movie. Had its faults, as all movies do, but it still followed Loki's real-life arc in a way. How? By having Loki dragged back to Asgard in chains and imprisoned underground. Again, not super happy that this happened to my love, and having to see it on screen was painful, but at least in the MCU he's not chained to a rock with venom dripping on his face for eternity, so there's that. (poor Sigyn. how tired do her arms get, holding up that bowl? best wife ever, amirite?)

In TDW, we're shown Loki's love for Frigga, who favored him and taught him magic as a child. We see his bravado; his attempts to mask his true feelings, especially grief. We see him slowly coming back to himself after the events of The Avengers, and slowly mending his relationship with his brother. He accepts that Odin will likely never love him, but Thor just might, because they were close when they were young. "I didn't do it for him." No, no my sweet, you did it for your brother, and a little out of guilt for what happened to your mother.

At the end, Loki fakes his death and escapes, taking the throne, and I have mixed feelings about this. Not the writer's choices here; I love that completely! A natural progression in Loki's story. But my joy is tainted by how closely they're following the Eddas now. Because Loki's escape from his prison heralds the beginning of Ragnarok. And Loki will die in Ragnarok. I don't want to see that play out in front of my face. I won't be able to handle the grief (spoiler alert! IW broke me. I almost walked out of the theater. Loki's death was legitimately fucking traumatic for me. I don't even care how pathetic that is. That grief was real, it was intense, and I still shake and cry when I think about it.)

Marvel announces that Thor 3 will be called Ragnarok. The internet treats this as a shocking revelation. I roll my eyes and mumble "duh" to myself and move on XD

Then they say Ragnarok will be a buddy comedy. I throw up a little in my mouth and no longer want to live on this planet. If they're going to make something called Ragnarok, could they at least treat it with even a fraction of the respect they've shown these characters thusfar? Jfc. I mean, I'll see it anyway, because I'm a whore for Tom Hiddleston lol. But come on, people!

I hated that they made Hel the long-lost older sister and Fenrir her fucking pet/attack dog. Those are my favorites of Loki's children! Hel is such an incredible badass that the early Christians named their dimension of eternal torture after her! They were terrified of her, to the point of naming the place that terrified them most after her. That's awesome! And Fenrir's just the best. I love wolves. Those two details, and Odin's retcon of "we're not Gods! ...lol, except your sister. she's totally a Goddess. and def gonna kill literally everything, so... good luck! byyyeeeee" pissed me off royally.

The rest was great. I genuinely liked this movie. Still do. And they finally used The Immigrant Song! That was pretty cool. If they'd thrown in Bring the Hammer Down and Thunderstruck, I might've called this movie perfect. XD

I wasn't totally in love with their portrayal of Loki in Ragnarok. Yes, the falling for 30 minutes line was funny, as was "I have to get off this planet" and "YES! That's how it feels!" And "Get Help" was funny as hell. But also, like... There is no way Loki would have been the dumb one in that first encounter with Hela. Also, he can teleport and project copies of himself and shit, so... He would not have been that desperate to go straight back to Asgard and bring her right along with them. Loki's not stupid. But whatever. Movie's gotta movie.

What I did love was seeing the slow mending of his relationship with Thor continuing, and the badass fighting on the bridge. I also loved that, like Real Loki, Movie Loki helped when help was needed, was quick and clever, and while he was carrying out the main plan, he was also planning ahead and grabbing the Tesseract. Yes, that drew Thanos right to them, but that's a whole other thing. Loki never would have left that thing on Asgard to be destroyed or lost.

And now Infinity War. Hooooly fucking shit. You know what? No. I'm not going into this. He was killed, years of character growth were erased forever, my heart fucking shattered. The end.

Endgame. IW hurt me so bad I didn't see Endgame until this year. I actually watched Civil War first (for context: I had actively avoided all Cap movies until this year because I fucking hate Steve Rogers. I find him insufferable. Did not realize what I was denying myself until I watched CW and finally saw the charms of Bucky. When he appeared in IW, I was so lost. XD I was like "...who dis? Murder Jesus?" also I just... didn't care. I was numb by then from crying through most of the movie over Loki)

So, anyway. Endgame. Loki picks up the Tesseract in alternate 2012, escapes, fans go "yay! he didn't actually die!" I go "yes he fucking did. Five years of his life, gone. Five years of growth and change, erased. Loki is dead. This will not be the same."

I was more right than I could have predicted. Now we come to the point of this rant. Sorry it took so long, but you were warned lol.

The Loki series makes me so angry I actually get sick to my stomach. It was fucking TRASH. When I praised Marvel for following Norse mythology so faithfully earlier? Yeah. I DID NOT MEAN TREAT HIM THE WAY THE OTHER GODS DID. I did not mean paint him as a pitiful clown, a joke, a caricature of who he truly was, with his pain and suffering played for LAUGHS.

This is supposed to be 2012 Loki, newly freed from Thanos' control. The Loki we saw in the beginning of TDW - snarky, exhausted, nihilistic. The Loki who rolled his eyes and said "get on with it" expecting to be killed.

The bumbling clown flipping on a dime from posturing to calling himself weak is not 2012 Loki. That is not ANY Loki. That is Tom Hiddleston in a black wig doing what he's told by a shitty writer who had no fucking idea what he was doing and was salty about his (bad) original script (for something totally fucking unrelated) getting killed.

In Episode 1, Loki is mocked, imprisoned, stripped against his will, tormented, belittled, and given a flippant summary of all the trauma Actual MCU Loki suffered that this one skipped out on, with no context, no acknowledgement of the trauma he's already lived quite fucking recently, and with the narrative twisted to not only erase all the abuse he's suffered, but to make it all his fault. And this is supposed to make him want to help these people?

And worse, IT FUCKING WORKS. WHAT?! I CAN'T- FUCKING WHAT?! Remember when I said LOKI IS NOT FUCKING STUPID?! So why is he STUPID?

Episode 2, he's a child. Mentally, this Loki is a fucking child. Now we've erased all the growth and development of his entire adult life. He's dopey, impatient, impulsive, desperate for a pat on the back and actually shows it. Yes, abused and neglected children crave the positive attention we never received, and we often grow up to be a bit emotionally stunted. But not all of us, and not Loki. Not as we've seen him EVER in the rest of the MCU. Playful and a bit callous at times? Absolutely! But not a big dumb fucking puppy.

Episode 3, a ray of hope, despite Sylvie! (I hate Sylvie) Loki casually admits he's pan/bi; labels never come up, but he admits to being with both men and women! He sings! Not really relevant to whether I approve of his portrayal or not lol but Tom has a beautiful voice, Norwegian ("Asgardian" lol) is a gorgeous, entrancing language, and I could watch that one bit on loop for eternity and never get bored. And then, finally, we see a glimpse - a glimpse - of Loki's power! He stops a falling building and pushes it right back up! Are we finally getting to see what he can really do? Will the next episode bring us Loki in all his glory?

Nope. 4 and 5 we see him mocked and pushed around and utterly irrelevant. Again. We see tiny reflections of what he could maybe theoretically do in other random Loki variants, but the "main" (lawl. main. it was the Sylvie and Mobius show. Loki was never the main anything.) Loki? Nothing. He wears his heart on his sleeve for no reason, bonds with the man who imprisoned, taunted, and gaslit him, is killed, and continues to be a moron and a joke. Always the clown. Always the dumb one. The one with the bad ideas. The inferior Loki.

Don't even get me started on that finale. I can't. This already took so much out of me. Fuck Marvel. Fuck this fucking show. I just... I'm done.