#i'd never heard it before but i'm obsessed now omg

[mooshroomterrarium]

for the fake fic ask game: 🐝

all the days of our delights are poison in my veins (from bitter water by the oh hellos)

(3rd Life SMP, Scar/Grian)

This game is going to end. The desert sand is sludge beneath their feet, a color Grian's eyes refuse to linger on, but still Scar's giggles fill the yawning night— he talks about winning like he doesn’t understand what that means, smiles at Grian big and stupid like he's never had anything to lose.

Grian wishes Scar wouldn't look at him like that. He wishes Scar would hate him, hurt him, give him a reason to ruin this. It would make the next part easier.

fake fic ask game

[astonmartinii]

loving on a sunday | lando norris social media au

pairing: lando norris x reader

y/n and lando, the grid and an honest attempt at a sunday roast

masterlist if you want to leave a tip x

yourusername

liked by landonorris, maxverstappen1 and 601,239 others

yourusername: warning !! do not own a nice country house and farm because you will get lumped with the annual post season grid dinner, SEB PLEASE COME BACK I CAN"T TAKE THIS RESPONSIBILITY @landonorris what are you going to do when they find out you can't cook?

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user1: learning that lando can't cook is the least surprising thing in the entire world

user2: i'm sorry post season grid dinner? brb just going to cry my eyes out why haven't we heard of this before

user3: for my mental health i need photographic evidence asap

landonorris: way to bait me out in front of the whole world, thanks babe

yourusername: i'm sorry but if this crashes and burns i need people to know that it was your fault (because it defo would be)

landonorris: where is the faith? you back me to win every race but won't back me to make some roast potatoes :(

yourusername: babe when i was sick you burnt the soup so bad we had to throw the pan out

landonorris: I TRIED I WAS STRESSED YOU WERE SICK

yourusername: awwww babe, but it was le crueset and literally cost more than my life

sebastianvettel: it's been an honour to host it but i know you and lando will do great, send me all the photos !

yourusername: thank you seb, please come visit the farm at some point xx

landonorris: see i knew seb would have faith in me thanks mate

user4: lando's gf being a farm girl makes so much sense but also no sense what so ever

yourusername: tis the south west babe it's either banksy or farmers and nothing in between

landonorris

liked by maxfewtrell, yourusername and 1,023,677 others

tagged: yourusername

landonorris: should be peeling potatoes right now she's too pretty

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user10: oh to be a kitty cat being cuddled by y/n

yourusername: you're such a smooth talker babe but those potatoes won't peel themselves

landonorris: my years of being teammates with carlos has come in clutch

yourusername: you still suck at flirting i just love you so i still swoon, any other person would probably laugh in your face

landonorris: gonna ignore the insult and focus on the fact that you love me

user11: i swear every time i see y/n she's with another animal i've never seen before

yourusername: my farm is a safe haven for any animal, if they find themselves there they'll leave with a full tummy and a good load of cuddles

maxverstappen1: if lando is on potato duty does this mean we won't get them? they're my favourite part of a roast y/n PLEASE STEP IN

landonorris: oh wow i see how it is

maxverstappen1: i'm dutch i'm so serious about my potatoes

landonorris: i also don't fuck around about roast potatoes HAVE FAITH

user12: can we start a petition for lando to stream this? like at least the cooking portion

yourusername: watching my nervous breakdown live would not be ethical

landonorris: it's true she threw a carrot at my head the first time she cooked for my family

oscarpiastri

liked by landonorris, estebanocon and 590,455 others

tagged: yourusername, landonorris

oscarpiastri: officially a farm boy for the week (also known as third wheeling for seven days)

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user15: omg oscar went early? my mclaren heart is so full

yourusername: so so happy to have you here osc!! though you're not any more trustworthy in the kitchen

oscarpiastri: i'd defend myself but we've all seen me fail to boil an egg

yourusername: you tried your best !! but you've mastered the english tea which is a massive asset

oscarpiastri: i think i'd lose my seat if i couldn't make a cup of tea

user16: obsessed with y/n dragging everyone for being menaces in the kitchen

user17: love how oscar was like: post lando? no. post ducks? yes.

landonorris: mate you asked to come early don't complain about third wheeling now

oscarpiastri: i know i asked to come early but if y'all could lay off the soft porn for two seconds would be appreciated

landonorris: don't pretend you don't enjoy it mate ;)

yourusername: lando don't be mean :(

landonorris: i'm sorry oscar, i'm sure you don't enjoy watching us be happy

oscarpiastri: thanks i guess?

charles_leclerc

liked by yourusername, landonorris and 1,034,560 others

charles_leclerc: sad to announce i've been banned from the kitchen:( even banned from making drinks as well

view all comments

user18: this is defo the banning i agree with, we all saw the vlog with the pesto pasta

user19: tbf i've come to the conclusion the one person y/n would let into the kitchen is seb

yourusername: you're not wrong

user20: i need a chick in my dungarees right now

yourusername: why are you complaining about a free pass to sit on the couch and have someone else cook for you?

charles_leclerc: well when you put it like that ....

landonorris: let me revoke all of my previous complaints

yourusername: you know i like to treat you baby

charles_leclerc: why thank you y/n but that's an inappropriate thing to say while in a relationship

yourusername: it was in reply to lando's comment charles 😭

landonorris: guy forgot he could read for a second

charles_leclerc: MY BAD

user21: i know charles didn't come to a farm in all white

yourusername: i regret to inform you he did (it's all designer as well)

yourusername

liked by oscarpiastri, landonorris and 702,340 others

tagged: landonorris

yourusername: sunday roasts are my love language, so happy to host the grid dinner with the love of my life

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user23: at first i thought she was being a bit too serious about this but that roast looks like it BANGS

user24: legit i need one asap

georgerussell63: carmen wants the recipe please and thank you

yourusername: bring her to the farm next time we're free and i'll teach her in person

carmenmundt: thank you darling

yourusername: anything for you

landonorris: ummm what about the guy you called the love of your life in the caption?

yourusername: i love you but i've tried to teach you to cook way too many times

user25: i'm sorry lando is so sexy

user26: forget lando, every pic i've seen of this house is the sexiest thing in the world

carlossainz55: thank you for hosting y/n and lando!! i had a great time see you on new years

yourusername: no worries chilli

maxverstappen1: the roast was the best thing i've ever eaten, i'll only dock points because i had to top and tail with daniel

yourusername: i didn't see you complain when i walked in on you guys cuddling

danielricciardo: you told me you loved it :(

maxverstappen1: i did !!! i enjoyed all of it, especially the roast though

landonorris: second to a roast @danielricciardo that's tough

landonorris

liked by alexalbon, yourusername and 1,208,943 others

tagged: yourusername

landonorris: so honoured to host the grid dinner and take over from such an inspiration in seb!! but mostly thanks to y/n for hosting at her farm and putting together an amazing dinner and weekend - also thanks for not killing the grid, i defo would have

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user27: i would've given a kidney to be there for real

lewishamilton: thank you for having us and for the sick nut roast

yourusername: we love you and roscoe !! and vegans are always welcome on my farm

user28: ROSCOE WENT?

yukitsunoda0511: thank you y/n i no longer think that english food is an abomination

yourusername: wow thank you yuki, i knew it would be hard when your only exposure was ... milton keynes

landonorris: wow my girlfriend is a miracle worker, and you're welcome yuki san we loved having you

user29: watching lando go from rookie to hosting the grid dinner, i'm soft

oscarpiastri: i love it here i'm sorry you're not getting rid of me

yourusername: no worries osc, you can stay as long as you want

landonorris: no complaining about third wheeling though, you're basically our child now

user30: experienced racer and rookie teammate friendships are so special to ME

danielricciardo: glad i managed to get my seat back just for this roast tbf

landonorris: not cause you missed me?

danielricciardo: eh i guess so

yourusername: just let me know when you're in england and you can come over for another

[ideasarestuckinmyhead]

Omg the god!Auron being obsessed with human!Rook was so good!!! I'd love to have a part 2 pretty please 🥺👉👈

Golden Cage of Mine.

Basically pt2 of A God's obsession love

This was an idea by my moot @yurinika

TW: Suicide as a last resort.

God of Love: Alphonse

God of the Hunt: Seth

God of Protection: Auron

God of Stars and Moon: Faust

God of the Dead: Lucien

God of Magic and Potions: Finn

"RRRRAAAHHHH!" Howling Rook grabbed anything that wasn't nailed done and throwing it across the room. Anguish cries were heard for hours as Rook's anger echoed through the walls. Auron no where to be seen, he learned from the 20th recarnation to let Rook let of steam.

After the third hour Rook began sobbing loudly, like a wounded animal. Clutching themselves as they heard the door open, thinking it was Auron they grabbed the broken candle holder. But saw a brunette and a pinkette men at the door.

"....Mortal, you don't know us but-" The God of Love tried to speak but Rook interrupted him. Rushing to get up and was a few feet away from the two.

"Your the God of Love! And the God of the Hunt! Please help me out of here-" Beginning to plead the brunette held up a hand. Silencing Rook's rambling, then turned to the Love God.

"Rook, I'm so sorry this is all my fault....I should have never pointed you out. If I haven't.....Auron wouldn't have found you." Tears began to fill the pinkette's eyes. The Hunting God placed a hand on him, then turned to Rook.

"There is a spell Auron placed on this room. Basically making it a Golden cage for you, I know you worshipped me before. And as your deity I'll try and help." Whispering Seth leaned back looking all directions. Not seeing Auron's eyes or ears he then turned to Rook. Alphonse then started talking, gently taking Rook's hands and giving them something.

"We've helped you before....your past recarnations. Almost all of us have, Faust was the only one to get caught. The rest of us...we tried to be discreet about it, but as you know Auron is stronger than us." Mumbling Alphonse pulled his hands away, leaving Rook to look at theirs. It was a little glass vile, it had ancient writing and was tied by a green ribbon.

"This is incase we don't get you out. It's a poison that would give you a quick and peaceful death. Finn made it for you." Mumbling Seth looked into their eyes, making them realize how serious they were. "If you can't have you alive, you'll be safer dead.....But I'm going to use a favor the God of the Dead owes me." Whispering Seth clenched at the bars at the door.

Alphonse placed a hand on Seth's shoulder. The Love God had a sad face, a tear fell as he turned from the two of them.

"I...I beat the God of the Death is a game. To get back a mortal soul that me and Alphonse loved....Sadly they were reincarnated already. So we must wait till they are ready." Frowning sadly he then shook his head and focused on Rook. Alphonse then spoke for him, looking around and whispering.

"If were able we can ask Lucien to take your soul. If you are owned by him Auron wouldn't DARE challenge him. He's the only one to go on par with him, Lucien chooses to not do so." Gaining this information Rook nodded and hid the vile just incase. They are willing to use it if they can make a deal with the God of the Dead.

"We've been here too long. We wish you luck, Rook." Nodding at them Seth then grabbed Alphonse and teleported away. The sent of pine mixed with sugar filled the air, before leaves and hearts made the two God's fade away.

Now with determination, Rook was getting out of here. Dead or Alive.

[stanheightsimp]

Hi!! Can I request something?

Adam Stanheight x Male Reader nsfw headcanons or a nsfw fic (w an established relationship) where Adam survived the bathroom trap and comes home to the reader then they have soft slow sex with lots of tears and I love yous and stuff?

Thank you!!

This request is amazing, I feel so inspired omg ????? Hope you like it, anon!!!! It's been a long time since I wrote MxM, it was difficult (but fun). (It took longer than expected, I got sick!)

Bring Me To Life | Adam Stanheight x Male!Reader (NSFW) angst!!!

"Make me feel alive" - You find your own way to comfort Adam | 2478 words

My spirit's sleeping somewhere cold Until you find it there and lead it back home Wake me up inside (save me) Call my name and save me from the dark - Bring Me To Life, Evanescence

🪚 Content Warning : NSFW smut, unprotected sex, mention of past trauma (canon)

MINORS DNI

Adam, your boyfriend of 2 years, had been missing for seven days. Seven. Days.

On the first day, you thought he'd probably ended up in police custody without being able to warn you. With all his stalking, this was bound to happen! You didn't worry too much.

On the second day, you woke up to cold, empty sheets. You'd gone to bed the night before, hoping that when you woke up, Adam would be there. But he wasn't.

On the third day, you got really worried. You called Scott, but he told you he hadn't heard from Adam since the last concert. You even called his parents, with whom he'd been on bad terms since his coming-out. And you started making the rounds of Jersey's police stations and hospitals, looking for anywhere he might have been admitted. But nothing. So you filed a missing persons report for Adam.

The fourth, fifth, sixth and seventh days were hell. You were deeply convinced that something had happened to Adam.

On the night of the seventh to the eighth day, the emergency services called to let you know that Adam had been found. Alive. In a bathroom, tied by the ankle to a rusty pipe.

Adam spent three days in hospital, before they allowed him to leave.

And there you both were, back in your shithole apartment, walking out the door hand in hand. All the way home from the hospital, he hadn't uttered a single word. Adam didn't talk much anymore.

Are you all right? you asked Adam as he stepped through your doorway, a rhetorical question designed purely to break the silence.

No, replied Adam in a weak voice.

Of course he wasn't all right. He was even skinnier than he had been before his capture. His eyes were dead. This was no longer the Adam you'd known. A small, fragile figure standing in the doorway with a hesitant air, as if it wasn't in this house that the two of you had been living for several years now. You understood instantly. That's because it was in this apartment that Adam had been captured.

It's okay, Adam, you say, holding him gently against you. It's going to be all right. I'm right here. Nothing's gonna happen to you.

He let himself go gently against your body, nestling his face against your neck and inhaling your scent deeply. You felt him tremble slightly against you.

It's okay, you repeated, the palm of your hand rubbing his back in regular circles.

I thought… I'd never see you again, he confided. It was the thought that obsessed me most. There I was, sitting in the dark, and I… and I…

You could only imagine what it felt like to have been captured, to have woken up in a tub of ice water. To see a man cut off his own foot before shooting him in the shoulder. To be alone in the dark, with only a corpse for company, the corpse of someone he had killed with his own hands. To cling to that faint hope, Lawrence's "I won't lie to you".

I… he stammered, unable to speak further.

His voice derailed. Adam was crying. You'd rarely seen him cry. Adam didn't cry much, except when his barriers collapsed. Your grip around his body tightened.

It's over, Adam, you're through, we're together.

Kiss me, he replied, urgency in his voice. Kiss me, please.

Your lips captured his, cautiously, gently. He responded instantly, with an eagerness that surprised you. His mouth parted, his tongue met yours, and his body pressed against yours. He pressed you to the wall with a vigor you hadn't expected given his weakened state, and deepened the kiss, moaning against your lips. Adam wanted more than just a kiss, that was undeniable. You let your lips run down his neck, as your hands slid under his shirt, against his torso and sides.

His knee slipped between your legs and you felt him smile against your lips. Fuck, his sweet breath. You couldn't get enough of Adam's taste.

Oh, Y/N… Adam gasped.

You felt his breath quicken, his body pressing against yours with desperate urgency. A rush of guilt came over you. You put your hands on his shoulders, hesitating, preparing to gently push him away.

Make me feel alive, he breathed, almost pleading. Make me feel something other than… than this.

Under normal circumstances, you'd have granted his wish. You'd ravage him the way he loved. But not here. He was so fragile, so breakable, under your hands. Instead of giving in to these most primitive of impulses, you decided to slow down, taking the time to caress Adam's slender body with your fingertips with a form of reverence. It was like rediscovering every square inch of his skin. It was like tasting him for the first time.

If he needed more, you'd give him more.

That's when you realized how much you'd missed Adam. How much you'd missed his smell. How much you'd missed the warmth of his skin, how soft it was under your hands. How much you'd missed the way his hair went all over the place. How the taste of his lips was something you could never, ever do without. It was something you'd often thought about, in spite of yourself, when he'd disappeared. That if something had happened to him, you'd go the rest of your life without being able to taste him, touch him, smell him again. You'd thought that the last time you'd kissed him, you hadn't enjoyed it enough. You'd suddenly realized that Adam, his smell, his taste, the texture of his skin, his body, his laughter, his kindness, were things you'd taken for granted, to the point where you no longer savored every kiss, every caress, every sexual act. You hadn't been grateful enough to have him in your life.

I'm going to make you feel loved, you whispered. Let me take care of you.

With every caress, you felt his taut body melt beneath your hands. His eyes closed, and a moan escaped from his parted lips. You don't know whether he or you initiated the movement, but you found yourselves on the sofa, you on top of him, pressing against his little body.

I love you, Y/N, Adam murmured.

I love you too, Adam. Close your eyes.

He shook his head:

No, no… I want to see you, I want to…. he began to stammer, his voice racing.

Okay, okay, you said softly, putting a finger to his lips. Okay. Look at me.

Adam quivered under your touch, squirming pleasantly under the reassuring weight of your body, and his reddened eyes never left yours. Gently, very gently, you removed his flannel shirt, then his T-shirt, leaving him shirtless, with only a bandage on his right shoulder. You questioned him again with your eyes, checking if he was willing to continue. And he was. Fuck, yeah, he was, as evidenced by his growing erection in his pants.

I want you so much, you confided, nibbling indecently on his earlobe.

His cock almost quivered. Your kisses traveled down his neck, savoring every inch of skin beneath your lips. You could feel his pulse beating against your tongue, fast and feverish, like a caged bird. Then your lips slid down his collarbones, as Adam's hands caressed your back, urging you on. His erratic breath grazed your neck, burning. You felt yourself getting hard, very hard. Your cock pressed impatiently against your jeans. Desire surged through you, a delicious heat spreading throughout your being. You needed more, you needed him. You wanted to taste him, touch him, feel him inside you, merge with him.

Do what you want to me, you breathed against his lips, nibbling his bottom lip.

You felt Adam's fingers trembling with desire unzip your fly, freeing your throbbing cock from its denim prison.

I'm going to ravage you so, so much, said Adam in a hungry voice that sent a violent shiver down your spine.

I'd love nothing more, you replied.

His fingers wrapped around your length, and you closed your eyes, stifling a moan.

I want to hear you. Don't hold back, Adam said with a smile.

You whispered his name, and Adam's lips stretched into a satisfied smile.

Normally, he would have called you "good boy" or some other puppy name. But not here. He just started stroking you, his hand tight against your cock, going back and forth. Fuck. Fucking little bastard. He knew the perfect rhythm to make you go nuts. His thumb gently caressed your glans, spreading the precum there.

Feeling Adam jerk you off wasn't enough. You needed more. You gave desperate thrusts, and Adam smiled.

You want to ride me, don't you? he said, and fuck, that was exactly what you wanted.

In one movement, he pulled down your jeans and boxers, which ended up on the floor with his shirt. Then he got rid of his own pants, and finally took off your shirt. Your movements were messy, sloppy, and with every move you let out impatient moans. Your heart beat furiously with anticipation in your chest, your cock throbbing with impatience for Adam to touch it again.

Adam caressed your cheek, dipping his gaze into yours. His lashes were still slightly damp, his eyes still a little red. His gaze was deeply melancholy.

If you only knew how much I love you… he said.

Your fingers grazed his jaw line:

I love you too, Adam.

From your cheek, his hand slid up your neck, fingertips sliding down your spine to between your buttocks. He inserted a phalanx inside you, eliciting a pathetic, begging moan.

Second phalanx. Your cock was gorging itself with blood, you needed him so badly it was painful.

Third phalanx. He had inserted a whole finger inside you.

- Are you all right? he asked, pressed against your lips.

So thoughtful. So kind. You nodded feverishly, eager for more. He inserted another finger inside you.

So tight, he commented. So tight… you can tell I haven't taken care of you for seven days…

He paused, his breath catching, realizing what he'd just said. He bit his lip, almost ashamed:

Oh God, Y/N I'm sorry…

Fuck me, Adam, you replied. Fuck me as hard as you missed me.

He began a gentle, delicate but firm movement with his fingers, moving in and out of you, while your hand wrapped around his cock. He was harder than he'd ever been, and you could have sworn his cock was bigger than usual. You began to jerk him off, feeling him get even harder under your grip. His head tipped back and he moaned your name in such a slutty tone that my god, it's a wonder you didn't cum in the second. And his fingers, his fucking fingers, long, slender, nimble, kept pounding your ass….

Eagerly, he withdrew his fingers, aligning the tip of his cock with your entrance, pressing it gently, but with a dull impatience.

And it was you who impaled yourself on him, feeling his fingers digging into the skin of your thighs. You closed your eyes, getting used to his presence inside you, clinging to him as, inch by inch, you felt his cock filling you, stretching you.

Fuck, Y/N… he murmured with a hoarse sigh. So tight… So hot...

In that instant you were nothing but a puddle of pleasure, unable to utter a coherent sentence. You moved slowly, your muscles stretching and contracting around him, and your nails dug into the skin of his shoulders.

He put his hand on the back of your neck to draw your face to his. You felt his lips curve into a wry, greedy smirk.

Are you ready? he asked, a purely rhetorical question, because he knew you were more than ready.

He kissed you, his tongue caressing yours fervently. You responded eagerly, your breath coming in short, ragged gasps. It was almost too exhilarating. His hands reached for your buttocks, and with his hips, he set a faster and faster rhythm, his eyes still in yours, his breathing quickening with his movements.

Faster, Adam, harder… you moaned, burying all restraint, all rationality.

Adam obeyed with undisguised joy. His hips slammed into your buttocks with violence as he pounded you with all-consuming passion, sending little electric jolts through your whole body. Your hands caressed his torso, moving up to his face, cupping his cheek. He tilted his head to one side and caught your thumb between his lips, sucking it with an innocent yet mischievous expression.

Do you like what you see? he asked, your thumb still in his mouth. You'd like something else in my mouth, wouldn't you?

His tongue swirled around your thumb and he smirked at you. You imagined him with your cock deep in his throat, your hands in his hair, guiding his rhythm. You pushed your thumb deeper into his mouth. Your imagination galloped as you straddled him.

His fingers tightened a little more on your buttocks, and he quickened the pace a little more, his backstrokes becoming messier, more desperate. You could feel the tension building inside you, each stroke bringing you a little closer to a precipice into which you were only waiting for one thing: to fall.

Adam… you moaned, and your body arched, sending him to the gates of his release.

He was the first to come, his cock throbbing inside you, spilling deep inside you. You came right after him, spraying a trickle of semen down his torso, all the way to his face.

Your body collapsed onto his like a house of cards, and almost instinctively he tightened his arms around you, his chest rising and falling rapidly. Your fingers tangled in his hair.

I love you, Adam, you say. Thanks for…

I needed it, he said hoarsely. I wanted… I wanted…

His face buries itself in your neck.

It's okay, now. We're together, you say.

He nodded, and you felt a few tears mingle with his warm breath against your skin. You moved to find yourself lying next to him, withdrawing Adam from you and getting used to the sensation of now being empty.

You gently turned him on his side and he came to snuggle up to you, a sobbing little spoon who, until a few minutes ago, was fucking you as if his life depended on it. You scratched his head affectionately.

It'll be okay, Adam, you promise.

Oh, yes, there would be bad days. But you'd be there.

[ryverbind]

Faceless Fixation (Sal Fisher): Beg For It [21]

TW: smut :P

_______________

dacnorthxx started following you.

sallysusedtoiletpaper: VI WHO IS THIS WHO IS NORTH WHY IS THIS INTERACTION GIVING ME LIFE??? t0ddles2: @sallysusedtoiletpaper frontman of dark autumn complex sallysusedtoiletpaper: @t0ddles2 oh omg ok... I've never heard of them are they any good?? ashypoops: I haven't heard of them either. What genre? More importantly DOES VI HAVE HER VERY FIRST SHIP toodswithoutthed: @ashypoops I WAS ABOUT TO ASK BC THE CHEMISTRY!?!? they're obsessed w each other... I went stalk his profile. Ship name options: northlence, violeth... t0ddles2: they're rock/metal. even if u don't like the genre, they're worth a listen sallysusedtoiletpaper: WORD I just followed him and their band account >:3 also @toodswithoutthed I'm personally a fan of violeth. I'm linking this shit in the faces fan discord ashypoops: THERE'S A FAN DISCORD??? can u send me an invite pooks🥺 sallysusedtoiletpaper: @ashypoops ofc😘 sallysusedtoiletpaper: OMFG SOMEONE BEAT ME TO THE CHAT EVERYONE KNOWS NOOOOOO

———

Yea, so I lost my job. Big shocker.

Once my boss found out that I dipped mid-shift, the text was typed out and sent by the evening.

In any other situation, I'd be fucked. Indefinitely. Completely broke and flailing to get a new job. In fact, that was my first thought. As soon as I got the text, I clicked onto my bank account to check how much I'd have to live off of until I found a new job--

--only to find out that I had over $2,000 just sitting around, which was such a nice surprise. I don't think I've ever had so much money to my name before in my entire life. And all the transactions were straight from all my streaming apps. All within the past two weeks since being back in LA.

To say the least, losing my job couldn't have happened at a better time. Now, I can put my focus into something I actually enjoy doing.

But first, a trip to Nockfell, which is proving to be more chaotic by the second.

"Todd, dude, there's a chemistry to this thing, okay? It's a ritual," Larry says, all seriousness and business face as he stares back into Todd's uninterested gaze. "I can't fly without it."

Todd blinks, a flash of frustrated disappointment crossing over his features. "You're not taking an edible before the flight, Lartholomew."

Ash had a ticket ready for me before she even got to LA yesterday. Her entire mastermind plan was to abduct me whether I liked it or not-- not that I would've said no to begin with. And besides, having her at the apartment to help me pack last minute made pre-flight stress non-existent.

Travis is camping out at my apartment. He was more than happy to kick me out of my own house, claiming that my bed is comfiest anyway. Regardless, he said he had no desire to return to Nockfell anyway. And dad was just excited for me to go visit considering how much I've complained about missing the little town over all these years.

Sal and I haven't spoken since his last commanding text to me. Right before his very sudden face reveal. He's caught in an almost petrifying silence-- has been since he put his prosthetic back on. I, on the other hand, very much resemble a little puppy whimpering and begging at his feet. Metaphorically, of course. I wouldn't dare to physically exploit my internal thoughts.

The really sickening truth is that I'm so desperate to see his face again that I'd trip him down a flight of stairs just to recreate yesterday's scene.

Just kidding. I don't mean that. I definitely don't.

"All our seats are kind of screwed up, so I have no idea where you're sitting, sugar." Ash pokes my cheek, her chin in her palm and elbow propped on the armrest of her seat. "I bought them kind of last minute so I took whatever they had available."

A little smile tips my lips as I turn my attention away from the grumpy smurf and focus on my stunning best friend. Her viridian irises glow with renewed joy and energy like our plans check off so many bullet points on her bucket list. "That's okay," I reply, tilting my head. "At least we actually have seats, right?"

Ash grins, her maroon shaded lips accentuating the light freckles along the bridge of her nose. "See?" she chirps, arm winding through mine to pull me closer. "You get it. When do you not get it?"

Our plane calls for us to board, and so begins the toxic, anxiety-inducing split-up of the century. I lose all The Faces somewhere in the crowded line that gathers at our gate in just a matter of seconds. That's okay though, I'll probably end up sitting with some old lady that smells like an odd mixture of peonies, Dial soap, and Lysol. You know, a funeral home and two colds away from death. So long as she's nice, I'll catch her dentures when they fall out of her gaping mouth as she naps.

Anything for MawMaw.

I hobble my way into the plane, brain set on finding my seat before stressing about all other one hundred and fifty two things I have to worry about later. People are everywhere and it's, expectedly, a huge plane. Three rows-- two seaters against each wall and a row of three seats down the middle. Sickening, really. Social anxiety's worst enemy is looking for means of escape only to be met by even more people.

I block everyone out as best as I can, pretending that the people I bump into are just very dense pieces of furniture. Or, actually, even better-- a bunch of really buff kitties. Yep, just passing through a horde of Maine Coon's and Munchkin's.

I spot row F, my pupils zeroing in on the letter like a scope on a gun. Target acquired.

The majestic way I veer around what my mind imagines is a really tall Siamese and their spouse, a yellow Persian, is something that the directors of The Matrix are pissed that they couldn't come up with. I swing my foot around a figurative pair of paws and reach my free hand out to grip onto my seat-- F20. That's right bitches, I did it.

I swing my suitcase up, somehow managing to actually get it into the overhead compartment. I give it a good shove with both of my hands and a grunt, then pull the backpack off my shoulders to keep it at my feet when I sit down.

But now that I've stopped, cats are pushing past me and it's so aggressive and rushed that they suddenly aren't sweet, fluffy kitties anymore. They're people again and I'm starting to get dragged away from my seat by this sea of shared distress.

Nimble fingers latch onto my wrist from the seat beside mine-- the seat against the window. The hand tightens around me, giving my body a good yank forward. I use the aided force to weave my way around a few more people up until the hand pulls me into my seat.

I huff out a breath, pushing my hair out of the eyeholes of my mask. And begrudgingly, I turn my head to meet bright cerulean hair.

Sal isn't looking at me, he's facing the window. His entire stature gives off a mixture of unbothered and ashamed. He shouldn't feel that second one-- never. Granted, he shouldn't feel angry half as much as he does but that's besides the point.

Ever since it happened, I could tell that the abrupt exposure of his face has been heavily weighing on him. I don't owe this man a single thing-- he's been awful to me in so many ways, but I give credit where credit is due. Not only did he own up and apologize to me yesterday, he helped me to my seat... and he is handsome. Regardless of how he views himself.

He's my biggest enemy and I, his. But if I plan on getting fucked during my visit to Nockfell, I have to give him the Beating of Truth.

"So," I mumble, chewing on the inside of my cheek. If you couldn't tell, I'm absolutely forcing myself to do this even though it's the last thing I want to do. "How are we working around Ash, Larry, and Todd when we get to Nockfell?"

Sal's head tips up a bit, like he's wondering to himself if I actually just spoke to him. Then his head pivots sideways so that he can side-eye me.

"What?" He asks, voice genuinely shocked and confused. It makes my heart stutter a bit. Any time he speaks in a tone that isn't aggressive, it completely reboots my system.

"How are we going to follow through with this arrangement?" I try again, simplifying it into Sal terms. He has a wide vocabulary range; maybe using bigger words will snap some sense into him. For added effect, I lean onto the armrest separating him and I, trying to show that he doesn't repulse me or anything of the sort.

Sal doesn't move away, instead, he adjusts his body so that he can address me. Fully turns his prosthetic face to me and settles into his seat. I didn't realize how tense he was when I first sat down, but watching him relax now shows me how much my simple mention of our agreement settled his mental turmoil.

He's quiet for a moment, eyes dancing across my mask and body before his gaze meets mine again. "You still want to?" he finally decides to ask, eyebrows lifting beneath his prosthetic.

"Yea," I snort, scrunching my nose up as if his question is ridiculous. "Why wouldn't I?"

Okay, stupid question. I know the answer and the words came out before I could stop them. In more ways than others, that was a genuine response though. I can't accept that Sal would be so put off by his own appearance because I truly think it's so lovely. I have to remember though that not everyone sees themselves the way I see them though.

Sal's brows bunch together again, his eyes narrowing. "Stupid fucking question," he echoes my own thoughts, voice even and void of tone. Whoopsie.

I roll my own eyes, sighing. "Well, to settle the whole debacle," I start, aiming to just bite the bullet and extinguish the awkwardness and misplaced fear vibrating between us. "I think you're quite the catch."

Friendly banter is weird. Borderline uncomfortable, but... not quite. Just so that I'm ready to get this over with but I'd be prepared for it to happen again.

A nasally snort leaves Sal and he rotates his head so that he's facing the pair of seats in front of us.

"So," he prods, ignoring my statement. "North?"

Mission success. I know he'll never admit it and he doesn't need to, but I think he appreciates the compliment.

"What's it to you?" I counter, adjusting my position in turn. I sit criss-cross applesauce in my seat, making sure my feet don't touch Sal because God forbid. "You still get to fuck me."

"Not much," he says lowly, hand moving to ruffle up his fringe. There's that dagger tattoo again. And then his head tilts just a bit, haunting sapphire blue piercing straight through my soul like the weapon etched onto his skin. "But you're mine. North can't give you even an ounce of what I can."

Fuzzy fingers, a pounding heart, and the worst case of cold sweats possible dominates my body for the rest of the flight. My brain replays that statement over and over again, plaguing me with recurring physical reactions like I've just heard it in real life again. I wish he hadn't said anything at all if it was going to leave me like this.

Neither of us said another word. The only sound between the two of us was the constant cracking of my knuckles accompanied by me putting my feet on the ground-- then sitting criss-cross again-- then having to readjust again and again and again. He left me quite literally restless and I'm sure he's relishing in just the knowledge of it.

Landing in Nockfell was a quick divergence from bubbly hearted affliction in my being. A good distraction from Sal.

Perpetual autumn. Nockfell never gets too hot or cold. The air is always misty, the sky always grey and cloudy. Tall, ever-growing trees dominate both night and day, stealing all the light from the sun and hiding it in their leafy treetops. Nockfell houses the kind of atmosphere that I've dreamt of returning to for years now; the gentle eeriness and chill that I've longed to bask in ever since I left.

We step out of the airport and into the small parking lot where a suspiciously blue haired man is waving at us with a big, dad-like grin on his face. Not a question in my mind. That's Sal's dad-- the cropped, receding cerulean hair was the first obvious sign but as we grow closer, his bright azure eyes are the second giveaway.

"Wassup, daddio!" Larry exclaims, wrapping Sal's father up in a huge bear hug (which is so Emo Buff Daddy of him). I nearly forgot that Sal's dad, who I now know as Henry, is also Larry's step-dad. Crazy.

"Not much, big guy!" Henry chuckles, rubbing Larry's back affectionately once the hug comes to an end. He pats Larry's shoulder, that big smile still on his aged face. "You guys brought the friend back! Convinced her to come huff up our humid air?"

Henry moves over to Ash, Todd, and then Sal to hug all of them. He purposefully places a discreet kiss on top of Sal's head before turning to me.

He holds his arms open suggestively and my heart flutters. "You okay with hugs?" He asks me. "Everyone's family here."

A grin of my own sneaks onto my face as I take a little step toward Henry and wrap my arms around his middle.

Henry's arms latch around my body, shielding me from the moist, heavy air of Nockfell and anything else that could possibly hurt me here. His embrace is so comforting, so familiar, so protective that tears I've been holding back for weeks suddenly rush to the surface.

I love my own dad, he's perfect, but being hugged by his near doppelgänger reminds me of how much I miss him. I wish dad and I weren't apart so often. But that'll change soon with the money I'm making.

I don't allow myself to weep, I hide the tears and pull away from the comforting hug I needed so desperately to smile sweetly at Henry. Lovely man, his own smile widens.

The group of us piles into Henry's old 2000 Nissan Pathfinder to navigate around Nockfell.

We first stop at Ash's place-- a home I haven't seen in a decade now. Everything is so nostalgic-- the tall, two story, white-painted, wooden home and the canopy of evil-looking trees that hide it from the road reminds me of a time that's been ripped away from me.

Ash leans on the door of Henry's SUV, the window down for her to speak to me before she disappears. "I'll come by Sal's or the apartments later to scoop you up, 'kay? Parents and I have a meeting with some guys to transfer ownership of some things to me before the move." She chews on her lip, a deep yearning in her pretty eyes. "I'd let you stay with me if I could."

I shake my head at her-- I don't want her to feel guilty for handling business. "No that's okay." I tell her sweetly, grabbing onto her hand. "I'll kickback with the guys."

Ash smiles, squeezing my hand in hers before breaking off to head to her house.

Now, I never imagined I'd end up coming back to Nockfell in general, but to stand in Sal Fisher's home? These were even more improbable odds.

And worse, Todd suddenly slips out of the house with the very mean (he's ditching me!) excuse of meeting with Neil for a late lunch. That just leaves me, Larry, and Sal standing in the spacious kitchen of their shared two-story home. It's quaint, roomy, and pretty nice. I imagine it's kept up specifically because Sal tends to it.

And Sal, he doesn't say anything. Which is typical behavior from him. He only, swiftly, spins on his heels, luggage in hand, and disappears into a room right past the stairs. Okay, fair. It's late in the afternoon-- naptime.

And now it's down to two.

I look to Larry with a grin. And he's grinning back excitedly, wiggling around like an antsy child who's about to go on a field trip.

"I can't believe we managed to get you over here," he whisper-yells, screaming silently. You know, just open-mouthed and head tipped to the ceiling in pure excitement.

"Even Copernicus wouldn't be able to debunk this turn of events," I joke, watching Larry dance around his kitchen. I put my bags down. I'm sure we'll figure out this situation later when Ash returns.

Larry opens up his refrigerator, moving around some bottles before uttering an expletive. "Ah, fuck," he hisses out, quickly lifting his head which results in him slamming said head into the freezer door. I pause, wincing, eyeing his silhouette warily while awaiting whatever he has to say next.

He resurfaces from the fridge, rubbing his aching head and chewing on his bottom lip. "I left my fucking bags in Henry's car." He curses again, glancing up at me with agitated eyes. "I have to run over to the apartments real quick." Larry starts inching away from the fridge and I feel my heart leap. How could he forget his luggage in the car? And is he really about to leave me here with the master of aggressive seduction himself? We're bound to tear this house apart either via sex or a physical fight. I just don't know which one.

"I'll be like... ten minutes at most," Lar says, squeezing past me and around the kitchen table, rerouting to the front door. He gives me a look that screams vulnerability and urgency. "Please don't kill Sal, and don't let him kill you. Okay? I'll be back in a jiffy."

I blink at him, running my tongue along the inside of my dry mouth. This is not going to go well. "Okay," I say anyway. I can already see the headline on the newspaper-- 'Masked Streamer, Sally Face, Brutally Murders and Chops Up Rising Streamer, VioletViolence, With Kitchen Knife.'

Larry nods at me, pinches his lips together in a moment of concerned hesitation, then disappears through the front door.

I stand in the empty kitchen for a moment, watching the back of Larry's head through the front door window. "In a jiffy..." I murmur to myself, recalling the most soccer-mom words I've ever heard come from Larry's vicinity. It was so odd, I mean he would never say something like that, but here we are.

The house is empty aside from myself and Sal. What the hell am I supposed to do? Watch The Office?-- well, that actually doesn't sound bad at all.

I can literally do anything I want, though. I have been given the most opportune opportunity to act upon my will as I see fit. With that in mind accompanied by the suspiciously good conversation a certain blue-haired individual and I shared on the plane, I think I have an idea of what I could do. And I know I'll have a willing partner. 

This will either end in a homicide via kitchen knife or an orgasm. I'll take my chances.

A sly little grin fights its way onto my lips as I spin on my heels, trekking over to Sal's room. His door is closed, giving him an ample amount of darkness to hide in while gaming or sleeping or whatever he's doing. But for me, it's the ample amount of darkness to create a moody setting. It's perfect.

The cold, metal doorknob sits comfortably in the palm of my hand as I give myself one last chance to think about this. I really shouldn't do this, but the timing will never be this good again. With everyone moving to LA, I may never get a chance this convenient since someone will always be around.

That's the last little bit of encouragement I need to twist the knob and slowly push the plain, white painted door open.

The wood squeaks on its hinges, making Sal turn his head up from his PC. His dark, shadowed eyes meet mine. They go from curious to a bit miffed in half a second— but he doesn't say anything, really just ignores me and turns back to his setup.

My heart races. He didn't turn me away or tell me to get the fuck out of his room. That's a good start. But that also means I can actually follow through with my very sudden plan— a plan which has no plan. I didn't even brainstorm what I could do because I genuinely didn't think I'd get this far.

I watch him closely, noting the way his computer casts a cool, blue glow against his prosthetic. His hand moves the mouse around and he clicks on various things, really paying me no mind at all.

My teeth clamp onto my bottom lip as I step past the threshold of his room, grabbing hold of the door and slowly closing it behind me. Once it latches into place, I wait, simply observing the man with my back to the door. For good measure, I turn the lock. You know, just in case I manage to get somewhere.

And he still doesn't look my way. The fact that he's ignoring my presence right now makes anticipation build up within me. My heart thumps a little faster than it already has been. My cheeks feel warm, I can't keep my hands still. It's like my brain is kicked into overdrive, forcing me to take notice of every little thing.

I lick my lips and take a step forward, scratching at the skin on my knuckles. I take another step, then another, my body growing warm with anxiousness all because I may stand in front of this man, present myself to him, and come to regret it. I really might embarrass myself. Just because we agreed doesn't mean he wants me at this exact moment.

But before I'm even really prepared, I'm standing right beside him. And he's sitting there without a care in the world, comfortably propped up in his gaming chair and pulling up different comments on what looks to be YouTube.

I've done about all I can for right now, but we are on limited time. So I watch him for a moment. He has to know I'm right here— I wasn't quiet, I didn't avoid his field of vision. I'm right here.

And I still get nothing.

Time to think. Should I say something insulting? That usually gets him riled up. Maybe then, one thing will lead to another.

I bounce on my heels for a second as I think up a quick insult. "Is this how you waste your time? Figured you'd at least reply to some of your fans if you were going to read their comments. Kinda shitty of you." Low blow probably. I don't really mean it, but I'm sure he'll take it seriously. His fans mean a lot to him, it's the best way to gain his attention.

But Sal doesn't even react, only scrolls through a few replies under a comment and clicks 'like' on a some. He doesn't flinch. Doesn't look at me. Never makes a sound.

I roll my eyes. Playing hard to get are we? He fusses at me for not complying all the time— he's such a hypocritical asshole. I hate that I'm into it.

I swallow thickly, putting my hands behind my back to try and hide my nervous fidgeting. "Sal," I try, cringing a bit. That was desperation— he has to know that.

Again, nothing.

He really must be trying to piss me off, that or he isn't interested at all. But thankfully, the zero interest half doesn't stink like I was afraid it would. Instead, it spurs me into action.

He can ignore my words all he wants, but he can't ignore me.

"I'm going to touch you," I warn because consent is important. "If you don't want that, you need to tell me."

I wait a good thirty seconds but he stays silent.

I pinch my lips together then grab onto the armrest of his chair, pulling it back just enough to place my body between him and his computer. He simply looks up at me with disinterested eyes, so I go further, fueled by the spark in my soul and the rage of him purposefully pretending I'm not even there.

I take a step forward and put a gentle hand on his shoulder for balance, then easily slide myself onto his lap. His thighs are warm beneath my own, his skin smooth under my fingertips. The dark ink on his biceps contrasts beautifully with the milky color of his skin and it's quite an honor to finally run my hands over his art.

I watch the way my fingers drag down his arm then up again, returning to his shoulder. I'm on top of him and he still hasn't said a word, still hasn't touched me. At this point, I'm yearning for something— anything.

The only good sign I'm getting is that he hasn't pushed me off.

I glance up, looking into his blue eyes that are darkened by the shadows of his room. They're watching me closely, no ounce of emotion reflected in them. He's just observing.

My other hand travels to his prosthetic face, gripping onto his jaw in the way that he does to me so often. "Think you can ignore me?" I whisper, a little smirk quirking my lips despite how badly I wish I could contain it.

A slight furrowing of his brows is what I get in return.

Ha, got him.

He still doesn't say anything, but I've piqued his interest at least.

"Larry's gone," I say next, my eyes traveling to the rough prosthetic in my hands. I run my thumb over the underside of his jaw, feeling a number of scars.

"I assumed so," he says, voice a bit deeper than it normally would be and toneless like it seems to have been all day.

My gaze meets his again, and this time there's a little fire in his pretty eyes. There's desire, interest, slow-building exhilaration. I love seeing this look on him.

"Mhm," I hum, moving my other hand from his shoulder to the side of his neck. "Are you going to sit here and ignore me like the asshole you are, or are you going to have mercy on both of us?"

Sal slowly blinks, eyes traveling over my form, drinking me in like I'm the last drop of water on earth. "You called me an asshole for a reason," he bites out. "Don't expect much. Unlike you, I can actually hold out."

"But what's the point of holding out?" I counter, tilting my head to the left. "Larry's heading to the apartments. We have about ten minutes. That's enough room for one of a couple options. Stop being a little prick and do something."

"More like twenty. Larry takes his sweet ass time." Sal's eyes narrow. "You think insulting me is going to coerce me into this, you little bitch? Thought you knew our dynamic well enough by now." My words are getting to him. That's exactly what I want.

"I do know our dynamic," I whisper, leaning my head down so that my face is level with his. I look into his cerulean eyes and they gaze back at me, one pupil dilated. Then, I bend lower until I'm at the nape of his neck, his hair tickling my jaw.

I use the hand holding his face to tilt his head up and away from me, using the angle as leverage to place my lips onto his warm skin.

I hear a muffled sigh from him in response and it takes everything in me not to smile.

My mouth moves slowly along the side of his neck, placing meaningful, wet kisses along his throat. But when I get to the hilt of his tattoo, I bit down gently.

He flinches at the feeling of my teeth digging into his skin, then completely aborts his mission to ignore me completely.

Sal's hands fly to my waist, one gripping tightly onto my hip and the other trailing up my back and into my hair, gripping the strands tightly before yanking my head back.

My teeth are ripped from his neck immediately and Sal pulls me away from him by the base of my neck. I gasp, staring into his captivating azure eyes from just centimeters away. His prosthetic nose bumps my mask's and he holds me there without a word.

His eyes trail down my face and heavy breaths follow his gaze. His cold fingers are curled into my neck, his nails digging into my skin.

I swallow, wondering if maybe I should have just minded my own business, stayed in the living room and waited for Larry to come back. Maybe I pissed him off.

I lick my lips and blink at him, my mouth gapes open as I try to find something to say. He's silent. It's not awkward, just scary. Scary is ten times worse.

Sal must see the regret and fear in my eyes because his own eyes lessen their harsh glare a bit and then he rasps out, "Can I touch you?"

Every inch of my body goes rigid with shock, anticipation. "Yes," I say, my voice barely above a whisper. My fingers tighten ever so slightly on the underside of his jaw while my heart runs an entire marathon in my chest. Now is not the time to get nervous because I sweat when I'm nervous. I need to be horny– not nervous.

Sal takes a deep breath, eyes set on mine. I feel his chest rise ever so slowly, then go back down the same exact way. The pause between us is utter agony and I feel like I'm going to start spazzing out or something. Honestly, with the way I'm sitting on top of him, I might just fall over and die on the spot. That feels less incriminating than whatever is about to ensue.

Cool fingers grasp onto my thigh, his palm flattening against my skin. His hand drags up to my side, followed by his other hand leaving my neck to grab the other side of my waist. The feeling of him touching me, just like he'd asked, fills me with memories I tried so desperately to forget just a couple weeks or so ago. This is deja vu in the best way.

In one swift motion, Sal lifts me up and plops me on top of his desk. I brace myself with my hands on either side of his keyboard that lays behind me. Questions of concern start flowing through my brain because this is an odd place to be.

"Don't knock over my shit," Sal breathlessly informs, eyes glancing up to me. HIs hands move to the waist band of my bottoms and I suck in another anxious, anticipatory breath.

I nod quickly, watching him with wide eyes as he looks down at my waist, his hands circling to the front of my stomach and fumbling with the button of my shorts. Oh my gosh.

I gulp, looking at anything but the man between my legs, currently pulling down the shorts I'd traveled in. His cold fingers brush along the outside of my thighs, causing goosebumps to rise all over my skin. He's slow, purposeful, dragging this out to get whatever reaction out of me that he can. It feels like my heart is about to explode.

I have no idea what he's about to do, he doesn't warn me either. I don't have the guts to watch this scene play out. The prospect of his dilated pupils, messy hair, and that glare in his captivating eyes is too much-- so much that warmth pools between my thighs before he can initiate anything.

"You look scared," he murmurs and I flinch at the gentle, comforting tone he uses with me. I've never heard something such as this come from him and be directed at mebefore.

"I am," I answer honestly, licking my lips while his fingers slowly pull my shorts down my legs. I lift myself a bit to aid him, shivering when my bare legs meet the cold surface of his desk. "A bit."

"Why?" Sal asks, hands pressing onto my thighs. With how warm my skin is and how cool his fingers are, the contrasting temperature is enough to spark an aneurysm. He drags those hands of his up my legs until he reaches my panties, hooking his digits into them.

I shake my head, chin quite literally tilted up to the ceiling. I'm not quite sure what has me so scared. Am I afraid of myself? Him? Getting caught? Being dropped again?

One risky hand leaves my hip and Sal's prosthetic comes into view. He's hovering over me, in a standing position now. His hair falls onto my shoulders, shielding us from the rest of the world like a curtain. I blink up at him, breath caught in my throat as a rush of chills invades my body.

"Hey," he says. His voice is a bit on edge, but it's concerned. So concerned that it distracts me from my own fear for a moment. "You're okay," he continues, his hand gripping onto my chin and pulling my head down so we can be eye level. I look between his bright eyes-- his eyebrows are risen a bit, as if to communicate to me that I can trust him. But can I?

"I'll take care of you. If you want to stop, if you don't want to start-- let me know. Say anything and I'll end it immediately." He tilts his head a bit, eyes glancing over my face. This is different. This looks vulnerable. "If I made you uncomfortable at all, I--"

My head shakes in opposition. I don't even have to think about it. "No, it's not that. It-- I trust you." The words spew out of my mouth and I immediately regret it. Something smug takes over his expression and I press my lips together, grabbing onto his wrist connected to the hand that's still holding my chin. "I trust you with this. If I was tied to train tracks, I wouldn't even think of calling you." I narrow my eyes at him to exemplify my point. His eyes squint as if he's... smiling? I'll ignore that. "But you've never... made me uncomfortable. You always ask. You always check. So..."

I watch him nod slowly, our gazes never disconnecting. He seems to contemplate what I've said, measurably formulating his next move. "Do you want to talk about what's stressing you then?"

My head rears back and my eyebrows furrow, his hand falling away from my face. "What brain eating amoeba has overtaken you?" I blurt out, holding a hand out between us. It's incredibly odd-- this is out of place. "You are never concerned about me-- what is this?"

If you can't tell, I'm not a fan of change. I greatly prefer stability even if it's toxic.

Sal drops the caring act almost immediately, his eyes rolling so hard that I'm worried they'll sink into his body. "I can't go down on you if you're freaked, can I? I wouldn't even feel comfortable doing that. I'm an asshole, not a monster."

I pause, every facial feature relaxing as his statement slaps me in the face. Key words: go, down, on, you, asshole, monster. Yep, only monstrous assholes go down on their enemies. I'm the very brave, very eager, very shocked recipient of this going down.

I take a deep, shaky breath, blinking at Sal who watches me with what looks like a raised eyebrow. "Okay," I breathlessly whisper. "How are you-- are you..." Why am I rambling? What kind of answer am I looking for? Obviously the prosthetic is about to come off and I just have to contain the desperate, whore-like rage within.

"Shut up, Vi," he chuckles over my nickname, grabbing onto my thighs and tugging me to the edge of the desk as he sits in his chair again. My fingertips press into the wooden surface while my heart threatens to pound its way through my ribcage. "Just let me taste you."

Cue internal screaming. I'm so going to faint-- and the addition of watching his pretty guitar-playing hands leave my skin to unbuckle his prosthetic is pushing me to astronomical heights. I don't even exist anymore. I'm just a wisp, a little phantom fairy watching her favorite sex movie play out in real time. It's called Faceless Fixation. She's the Fellatio Fairy. I don't even-- whoever is writing my life needs to give me a break.

I'm shivering like I have hypothermia by the time Sal carefully pulls the prosthetic off his face, making sure to not mess up his hair. And then he glances up at me. Bright eyes hesitant, sort of wide. Eyebrows risen just a bit and lips pressed together like he wants to say a thousand things but can't. He looks so nervous and it's a moment we can both share.

For reassurance (I think we both need it) I smile at him. Just a slight upward tilt of my lips as I press my thighs together. He's so beautiful. Every scar, every indentation, every feature, every little freckle. Just wow-- he's a sight to behold.

Sal's gaze flits to my lips, then down to my legs and he grabs onto them again, purposefully pulling them apart. His black polished nails dig into my skin as he gazes down at my underwear. I'm so used to watching his reactions and feelings portrayed only through his eyes, but watching the way his jaw tenses and the moment his lips part like he can't wait any longer makes me feel like I'll implode. 

His fingers run up my legs to my hips, dipping into my panties and pulling them downward. I gulp over the sight, relishing in the deja vu. How kind of him to not rip these this time. 

I lift myself up as he shimmies them down my legs, finally pulling them from around my ankles and holding them up for me to see. I blink, warmth rushing to my face at his boldness. And Sal, well-pleased, quirks a little seductive smile at them before switching his gaze to me.

"I haven't even touched you and you're soaked," is what he murmurs, eyes dancing over my half naked body with very little focus on my face. It's like he's glued to what hides behind my clenched thighs, eagerly awaiting what he'll find between them. "You're inflating my ego way too much," his voice is a bit louder this time-- darker, more sinister. The pronunciation of his words shows off charming, slightly crooked front teeth and sharp canines. I'll never know how I haven't ascended already.

I shiver, trying and failing to hide my reaction. But it doesn't really matter, seeing as Sal caught onto it anyway and his hooded eyes are on mine, a dangerous glint clashing with the hypnotizing azure shade of his irises. 

His hands are on my legs again, fingers roughly squeezing my skin. He isn't putting off his plans again though. When he separates my legs and I try my best not to push him away out of fear, Sal leans forward and presses his lips to the inside of my left thigh.

I take a deep, shuddering breath as I bathe in the feeling of his soft, jagged lips moving along my sensitive skin. I commit the image to memory, absolutely astonished over the way his blue eyes are closed while he inches closer and closer to my pussy.

I'm unable to take a full breath at this point, my body is tense while I try to hold myself in an upright position, pathetically falling apart as his mouth dances along the inside of my thigh like he's studied and perfected each step he takes. His hands are molded into my skin, they've become a part of me. He's pressing my thigh up to his face, leaving the most inebriating kisses. I wish he would stop teasing me already.

At the same time, I'm obsessed with the way he's handling me. Delicately, carefully, but he's in full control and making me wait. Testing me. Seeing if I'll push him, hoping I'll give him a good reason to punish me.

Sal's eyes open again, glancing up to meet mine. I suck in a breath, watching as he opens that dirty mouth of his and bites into the sensitive skin at the top of my thigh.

I hiss, wincing at the slight pain but my eyes never leave his. They could never. And he loves that, takes it as a challenge because those sky blue eyes close and he bites down harder, sucking my skin into his mouth to leave his mark. 

Some kind of satisfied, sickeningly delighted feeling swells in my chest at the knowledge of having a mark from him on my body. It's primal, it's a little weird, but I adore the idea and maybe he does too. After what he said to me about North on the flight to Nockfell, I'd guess he's more than happy to stake his claim even if it's invisible to the outside world. 

Sal finally pulls his teeth from my leg, revealing a gnarly, dark purple mark in his wake. He places a quick, soothing kiss to the abused skin before trailing his way closer to my pussy. He masks his destination with more wet kisses and bites and I'm so worked up by now that a light sheen of sweat has formed on my forehead. I can't be doing this-- this is complete torture.

"Sal," I groan out, flinching at the sinful tone of my voice. It makes him pause his movements as well. "Please," I tack on, the word quiet and agonizingly pleading.

He hums against my skin, eyes zeroed in on mine. I hate being so direct, it's terrifying, but it's worth it if it'll end up with his tongue buried in me, right? 

"Beg for it," he says lowly, a slight rasp to his voice. His tone makes me shiver, as well as his words and I would drop to my hands and knees if he told me to right now.

My lips part upon hearing him and I release a shaky breath, thighs drawing together until he stops them with his tight grip. My heart is running a marathon, my limbs are trembling and I'm wondering if maybe this is all just a really awesome dream.

"Please," I repeat, voice coming out as a whine. For once, I don't regret it because this is what he wants. "I'm desperate." I don't know how else to portray to him that I need this-- the wait is nearly excruciating. "I need to feel you."

Sal pulls away from my skin, tongue lapping at all of his bite marks before a sadistic smile pulls at his lips. "How much do you hate me?" And he's waiting, waiting for a wordy explanation of my distaste for him. But now, with the way things have changed between us-- even if it's slightly-- describing my loathing somehow feels harder.

So I snort, trying to coerce him into putting his mouth on me again regardless of the location. But all the shivers, waiting, and very slow building orgasm is slipping away into the distance. "A lot," I whisper shakily.

He gives me a look, eyes narrowed and lips pressed together as if I've disappointed him. "You can do better than that, Vi. Where's the fire?" He leans toward the thigh he hasn't captured with his mouth yet and skims his teeth along my skin. "Should I give you an example?"

I lick my lips, a sudden fluttering in my chest making me feel light headed. I hesitantly shake my head-- the longer he isn't paying attention to me, the farther I am from cumming. I can come up with something to say can't I? Of course I can. He's infuriating enough.

"Alright then," he mumbles monotonously, finally ditching my thighs. He yanks me a bit closer, eyes still rifling through my soul. "Then tell me. And if you stop," he warns as I swallow against the pounding in my chest due to his positioning, face mere inches from my sopping cunt. He's dragged this on long enough. "I stop. Keep that filthy mouth of yours moving."

He waits for me to launch into a monologue of detest. His mouth so close to my clit, breath tickling my skin and forcing a quiet little whimper from me. 

"I fucking hate the constant foul mood you're always in," I force out, feeling my heart leap into my throat the second the words leave my mouth. Because Sal keeps his promise and with an inebriating grunt of approval, he finally attaches his lips to my clit, tongue running over it like he's desperate to soak up every inch of what I have to offer.

The feeling of his mouth on my pussy is incomparable to any other type of satisfaction in the world-- this is what I've waited for. And he happily makes up for the lost time, expertly flicking his tongue over the bundle of nerves and sucking it farther into his mouth. He moans against my cunt, hands dragging up my thighs to cup my ass and force me even closer to him. He squeezes my skin, a reminder to keep talking.

I dig up all the things I can't stand about him, slathering them across my brain so I can tell him about it. "You're a brick wall. No matter what I say, you refuse to listen. How come you're never open to hearing anyone out?" I whimper between words, squirming around on his desk and trying my damn hardest not to ruin any of his belongings.

Sal lifts my legs over his arms, pushing them onto his shoulders and I swear I'm about to combust. The way his tongue maps figure eights and circles around my clit does nothing to help, only sends me further toward falling apart.

I squeeze my eyes shut, fingers curling over the edge of his desk, heavy breaths and quiet moans falling past my lips no matter how badly I wish I could keep them inside. "You have some kind of God complex. You think you're right about everything, have to be in control of everything and I can't stand it. I can't stand you and your constant need to have everything you want."

His teeth graze over my clit and my mouth falls open, waves of pleasure rolling through my body like I've never experienced before. He moves downward, his tongue buried between my folds and licking up every bit of my arousal that he can get. Upon getting a better taste of me, he moans and I can feel the vibration of it everywhere, all the way up to my fingertips.

"I hate how easily you turn me on, how wet I get just from a simple touch," I admit, teeth clamping down onto my bottom lip as his tongue explores the inside of my pussy like he's been starved of me for far too long. His nails dig into my skin, the action eliciting a stinging sensation that only adds to the pleasure he's giving me. This is everything. "And you're so unfair. So pretty, so damn attractive with that horrible personality of yours. Why can't you be pretty through and through?"

I open my eyes again to watch him, drowning in the prospect of his face buried between my thighs, cheeks flushed and hair a mess. I watch as he drags his mouth up to my clit again, drawing patterns and shapes I don't care to know over the bundle of nerves. The rough, slick feeling of his tongue on such a sensitive place is addicting. So long as he's around to bring me to new heights like this, I don't need anything else. Maslow's hierarchy of needs has never been so wrong-- this is my sole need.

I can't help myself-- I reach a hand out, my fingers burying themselves into Sal's hair. It's soft. Just as soft as I knew it would be. And he doesn't seem to mind, only continues to suck on my clit and abuse it with his tongue. I close my hand into a fist, lightly tugging on his hair. I need something to hold onto.

"And your stupid fucking mouth," I groan out, sucking in a breath that never fully fills my lungs. His tongue dips into my pussy again, making another little groan follow my first. My thighs are clenched tightly at this point, quaking furiously. Sal never tries to stop me, doesn't calm me. It's clear how much he enjoys bringing me to ruin. "All the awful things you say, so many dirty words and you are so good with your tongue. I've never craved and loathed something so much in my life." 

Sal smiles against my pussy-- I watch in pure amazement as the corners of his lips curl upward like what I said was everything he's always wanted to hear. It's so lewd, so perverted and I absolutely will never forget this moment.

One of his hands lets go of my ass, trailing down my thigh again but moving to the inside this time. As his teeth gently nip at my clit and his tongue laps at my pussy, the tips of his fingers press against my opening, a silent request for more of my profession of hatred. A profession I'm more than happy to give him.

"I can't imagine how much I'll hate the way you fuck me just because I know it'll be better than any sex I've had before," I tell him, watching his mouth move against my cunt with furrowed brows and my lips parted in intrigue. Oh, he's so good at what he does. 

Sal's eyes meet mine again. Eye contact with him when he's in such an erotic position is incredibly intense. I feel like my entire body is going to crumple before he can finish me off and it all counts on if he's able to hold me up or not. But as soon as his cerulean gaze meets mine, two of his fingers sink into me. The action is slow, drawn out, and drags a nasty moan out of me in turn.

Sal whimpers against my pussy, taking care of me like he promised he would. When his fingers reach as far as they can go, he curls them, causing me to flinch at the sensuous feeling. There's so much going on to the point that every inch of my body feels impossibly overwhelmed. 

My sensitive clit gets sucked into Sal's mouth again, but then he pulls away. His fingers make up for the absence of his tongue, pounding into me in the same salacious way he's done before.

"Is that all you've got?" he grumbles breathlessly, glazed eyes glaring into mine. This is the expression I'm used to with him-- anger and dominance. 

I choke on the breath I try to take, my thighs pressing into his neck as his fingers slam in and out of my soaked cunt, digits only pausing their relentless pace to curl into me. I try to fight against my one working brain cell, try to form words for him, but-- "I can't." is all that I'm able to create, the two short words coming out as an imploring cry.

Sal stands, finger-fucking me into an alternate dimension. He hovers over me, his hair brushing my shoulders and neck. I watch him, an absolute mess beneath him but I can't look away-- even through the panting breaths that morph into whimpers and moans. 

His eyes glance between mine, seemingly contemplating something in that meticulous mind of his.

"Yea, you can, gorgeous," he grinds out behind clenched teeth, using the hand that's gripping my ass to press me against his chest. Our even closer proximity somehow forces his fingers deeper into my pussy, his thumb rubbing my clit. "Tell me more." My mouth is dry, I'm going to cum soon, and hopefully I don't actually fall over before that.

Sal takes a page out of my book, leaning closer to me and nipping at the skin of my throat. A little gasp falls past my lips and I finally let go of his hair, dragging my hand down to his neck. Those fingers work me to the core, never ceasing their movements and pushing into me with so much perfectly applied force. 

His mouth moves along the side of my neck, his lips still wet from my juices. I have no idea what gave him the confidence, but I'm not mad. Everything that couldn't be done with his prosthetic can be done now and he's taking advantage of it. "Speak," he snaps, tone not so gentle or comforting like it was when this first began. "Or else."

My mind is blank. "I'm about to cum," I begrudgingly whisper, completely overtaken by his fingers thrusting into me and his thumb focused on my oversensitive clit.

I shut my eyes, my free arm wrapping around his shoulders. Every inch of my body is tense, senses heightened and alert. I don't think I can possibly hold on any longer-- I doubt Sal needed my confirmation to tell that I'm close.

His digits curl into me again, repeating the action. I follow up with a loud whimper, my nails digging into the skin of his neck as he sucks on the skin behind my ear. I wish he'd have ditched the prosthetic sooner because I've really been missing out.

The hand still gripping onto my butt retreats to my stomach, fingers disappearing under my shirt and crawling across my ribs to my bra. He treats it as if it isn't even there, hand easily dipping beneath the fabric. His palm envelops my breast, squeezing gently and massaging the skin. It's such a considerate touch compared to the way he treats the rest of my body-- he knows exactly where the sweet spots are. 

"Cum," he commands, lips brushing the shell of my ear and fingers pounding into my sore cunt, thumb running over my hardened nipple.

My head drops onto his shoulder and with one more curl of his fingers, I do as he says and fall apart in his arms. I burst almost instantly, doing anything to keep myself silent over the feeling of his fingers gently caressing the inside of my pussy, riding me through my orgasm just like he did the first time. My teeth sink into his shoulder, a muffled whimper following soon after. Sal tenses up in my arms, a pleasured breath falling from his mouth and fanning over the side of my neck.

"Good girl," he purrs into my ear, lips skimming over the warm skin at my throat. He leaves one more sloppy kiss to my neck then pulls away to look into my eyes again. I can hardly hear anything he says as my teeth are forced away from his shoulder, still reeling from the orgasm that slammed into me nearly unannounced. My limbs feel like jelly as chills run up my spine. "You listen to me so well," he continues. I can't even look into his eyes; I just watch the way his lips move. How his tongue presses into the back of his teeth to pronounce a syllable. His sharp canines that undoubtedly left their own bruises on my skin. 

I gulp, unable to peel my eyes away from the mouth that masterfully brought me to climax. For the first time ever, I wonder what his mouth would feel like against mine. How soft his scarred lips would feel, not on my skin, but captured by my own. What his tongue would taste like. What his teeth would feel like nipping at my lips. 

Sal doesn't move away from me-- keeps our close proximity with his nose nearly brushing my mask's. He slowly, delicately pulls his fingers out of me but only continues to gaze into my eyes.

This is dangerous territory. Very dangerous. Because the impossible is coursing through me right now and I... somehow can't find it in me to hate him in this exact moment.

But then he blinks. Stands to his full height, moving away from me. His azure gaze turns to the desk I'm sitting on and he grabs my panties, offering them to me. Not an ounce of emotion evident on his face. I'd always wondered what he'd look like simply because I was curious if his face gave away his emotions better than his eyes could. It's pretty impressive how he's able to keep a straight mug though, RBF and all. Especially when he lifts the hand he fingered me with to his mouth and licks my cum off. He doesn't even look at me as his tongue runs up the length of his digit, just turns away from me and walks to the other side of the room.

I'm floored, jaw dropped and pussy wet. Again. That's really fucking hot.

I watch him strut away, follow his movements as he drops to his haunches and opens up his suitcase with his clean hand. He grabs something then faces me again, beginning to walk back with a finger still in his mouth.

My chest tightens at the sight. He can't be doing this to me. Not when Larry is going to be home any minute-- he needs to keep both his hands at his sides.

Thankfully, Sal has some mercy on me and finally finishes cleaning his fingers, eyes darting up to mine again. He walks up to me, right where I'm still sitting on top of his desk and drops fabric onto my bare thighs.

My brows furrow and I look down, grabbing lace. I lift it up, unfolding it to see that it's a near replica of the lace underwear he'd ripped off of me in Vegas. Only it's a completely brand new pair. No rips, no issues. My heart swells a bit at the gesture-- he bought a new pair like I'd told him to. I wasn't even serious, but he did it anyway.

I puff out my cheeks, contemplating what to say. Thank you's are virtually nonexistent between us. My eyes flit up to meet his again and he stuffs his hands into his pockets, watching me.

"You taste good," he nonchalantly comments, causing an infuriating blush to heat my cheeks.

"Thanks," I murmur, holding up the lace panties to show that I'm thankful for them too. "You taste pretty good too." He does. I'll have to return the favor to him when I get the chance.

A barely audible snort comes from him and I almost smile. 

"I'd fuck you, but Larry will be back any minute and Ash probably isn't far behind him," he says, turning on his heel and walking toward the door. "I suggest you put your clothes back on. Panties are clean, I washed them."

My eyebrows raise and I pinch my lips together. Huh. "How kind of you," I say half sarcastically. Only half because it's helpful that they are clean-- it's almost like he knew he'd place me in a predicament where I needed fresh underwear. "You trying to kick me out?" I add. Of course he is, I'm just trying to make my way out of here as awkward-less as possible.

"Hell yea," he says proudly, "I have shit to do."

"Are you calling me a distraction?" I ask, looking toward him as I shimmy my underwear and shorts up my legs then start working on the button.

Sal tilts his head, hand on the doorknob. "And a mild aggravation."

"Oh, wow," I gasp, feigning surprise. "Mild? I must be working my way onto your good side."

"Fuck me good enough and we'll see how far you get," he replies, eyes watching my every move but face still unreadable as I begin walking toward him. 

I roll my eyes. Of course. I pinch my lips together and give him a disinterested look. This is my lesson to never try to have a casual conversation with him again. He clearly doesn't want it, which, fair. Our agreement is sex, not friendship. "Okay," I say dramatically when he opens the door for me. "Bye, Sal."

The man nods his head, acknowledging the shift in the room. His eyes stay glued to mine like they have been the entire time I've been here. Now that I'm not distracted by his mouth on my pussy, I realize that this is an odd thing for him to do. He looks at me every once in a while, but not in such a... scrutinizing way. 

He purses his lips and says, "Bye, y/n."

Every nerve-ending in my body suddenly shuts off. Everything is still. I have no thoughts for a moment, no physical reaction. Just stillness. I don't breathe, I don't move. I just watch him.

There's no way— he has to have mixed up my names. It has to be that.

And then everything hits me. Sal Fisher just said my name. And not the fake one that I've been hiding behind. He said my actual name— the one that's on my birth certificate. And now my hands are shaking, my heart is racing, my breaths are uneven, and I feel like I'm going to throw up.

"What the fuck," I say shakily. I'm not ready for this. I'm going to completely switch his thought process around-- "did you just say?"

The look in his eyes changes, they light up a bit as if he's caught me. And still he decides to mess with me. "Huh?" he innocently asks.

Okay, I'd really like to wake up now.

My eyes narrow. So that's the game he wants to play? This isn't the time and I don't have the mental capacity to handle this. Not only am I recovering from a mind-blowing orgasm, but I was just getting over the overwhelming anxiety I suffered from yesterday.

"I'm not y/n, if that's what you're thinking," I rush to tell him, even adding in the fakest little smirk I've ever slapped onto my face. Anything to get him off my tail, whatever I can think of to save my ass. This really can't be happening to me.

He's still watching me speculatively and it's making my brain itch. "You know," he finally starts, voice disgustingly pleased. "I went out on a limb with that one." I watch in horror as a little smirk begins to grow on his face. I don't want to accept it yet, I really don't, but I think I'm fucked and not physically. 

At the end of the day, he's still managed to fuck me in multiple ways. I cannot stand Sal Fisher.

"What are you even talking about?" I ask him, clearing my throat quietly while taking a safe step out of his door and into the living room. I try my best to keep my eyes on him while extinguishing the fear from my gaze. If I act horrified, he'll sniff me out instantly. That is, if he hasn't already.

Sal chuckles deeply— it's, shockingly, an amused and prideful one rather than something sick, dark, and twisted. He leans against the doorframe, arms crossed over his chest. I try my best not to adore the way his scars stretch with his laugh and the sight of his pretty teeth. "Any other woman would have assumed I was sleeping with someone else if I called them by another name," he says lightheartedly, tilting his head down a bit. "But you didn't. And that can only mean that I'm right."

I open my mouth to decline, fear thrumming through me. He caught me red handed. I can't fucking believe this.

"And don't try to deny it, you won't change my mind. I've been very sure of who you are for months now."

My head slowly begins to shake of its own accord. He never fails to shock me. "How..."

Sal shrugs. "You couldn't have timed your introduction more horrendously. Think about it," he says, chewing on his bottom lip. "I bitch at y/n over a phone call, then the next day, a wild VioletViolence pops into my life and isn't too surprised by my shitty personality. The second you were added to the Discord server, I had my suspicions." He shrugs nonchalantly, like the confirmation doesn't bother him in the slightest. "I talked it over with Larry and Todd too. They're pretty sure of your identity as well. They were just nice enough to wait for you to tell us on your own." His eyes narrow, sly like a fox. "But I'm not nice and wanted to know for myself. Wanted to scare you a bit too."

I swallow over the bile rising in my throat. Scare me, he did. I have no idea what to do with myself. I must look like a deer in headlights nearing its death sentence. "It... it doesn't bother you?" I decide to ask in a small voice, unable to blink as I watch him closely.

That same smug little smile is still lighting up his marred face as he says, "Regardless, I still can't stand you and I'll still fuck you stupid."

-----------

A/N::::::: OMFFGGGGG I HAVE BEEN WAITING FOR THIS CHAPTER FOR AGESSSSSS PLEASE!!! more specifically the end of it! i've had this last scene written since like... 2022 o_O 

i want to give a HUGE thanks to my very good friend, Phoebe, who inspired me to write the catalyst of the smut scene with this AMAZING piece of art that they drew :3 i am soooo so grateful for having the opportunity to see the art in general, but getting to write it too??? OMG so incredibly grateful <33

side note: this is my first time writing a smut scene like this one-- well, actually any time i write a different kind of sex it's new for me LMFAO i am exploring EVERYTHINGGGG and i also have no idea if this is any good. so like last chapter, if y'all could give me some tips or things you like and didn't like, i would GREATLY appreciate it :3

i'm going catch up on my neglected homework. as always, have a wonderful morning/day/evening/night. my heart belongs to all of you <3

[autismprotocol]

Hey, sorry if this is long, but I really like what you guys are doing and have nowhere else to put my theories, so...

Firstly, sorry to be that person, but I actually think you mislabeled the entities for two episodes. Needles reads like an avatar of the slaughter to me. It's like Lietner said, the physical description is less important then the emotional or metaphorical. Needles' thing isn't "look at this scary trick I can do with my flesh body." It's "I am going to cause you intense pain at random by stabbing you with my needles. Please be scared of me :)"

I was also surprised you didn't mark Putting Down Roots as a filth statement. Illness, rotting alive, swarming flies, a deeply unhealthy romantic love. All reads as corruption to me.

Now let's get to my fun crack theory. Episode 7 almost reads to me like the point the powers breached into the new world. Think about it, hilltop road was suddenly overwhelmed by a wave of artifacts and "people" (avatars) that map to many different powers (I counted stranger, slaughter, dark, filth, and possibly hunt among the artifacts present). The timeliness doesn't quite match up (we have a statement from the 1800s), but maybe the powers are capable of having retroactively always existed. Or maybe the fan theory that the entities are now the "hungers" that feed on obsession was true until the fears intruded into the world.

Omg thank you so much for the ask I absolutely love over analyzing this goofy lil podcast and i really wanted to have this board be a collaborative and community thing for all of us TMAG/TMAGP fans out there!

starting with the board corrections you pointed out you are absolutely right after reading this I ended up rereading the wiki entries about the Entities because its been a hot second since I've read up on those goobers and I've kinda forgotten how many little nuances that each one has. I had no idea how we missed the clear corruption tie-ins that were occurring in Samuel Webbers journal (Putting Down Roots) especially when you brought up his toxic relationship to his partner.

As with Needles before doing my reread about the fears I just assumed flesh because body modified with needles. but looking into it, sudden piercing needles more cleanly falls into slaughter.

I actually have this ongoing theory originated by my roommate and other blog contributor that the fears might have been scrambled when crossing dimensions. maybe because of this many minor powers have begun to branch out from the main 15 and with that hybrid avatars and entities have been created. With needles I think maybe they fall under the umbrella of slaughter and spiral because of the way they mentally toy with their victims. also could explain why needles has to convince the man on the phone that they're scary because this hybrid power may be new and people have not gotten fearful of it yet.

I'll be making those changes for next weeks board so thank you for pointing them out :D

on to your theory that would make sense especially since this episode (EP 7) is kind of serving as the catalyst for the story to shift into high gear. I think that if the Hilltop charity shop was the entrance point for all of the fears to enter the world it would make complete sense. Hilltop is the one place in the Magnus canon that people have reported traveling to different dimensions. also the date of the incident falls right about the time that Archives started early 2016 so the fears may have also gone back in time to when Jon became the Archivist in TMAs universe (since Jons death is the catalyst that forced them to jump dimensions.) I'm really liking where your theory is heading

also real quick if anyone has more info about the theory that Protocols world lived off of hunger and desire pre the fears appearing I'd love to hear more about that because I've never heard of the until now.

Again thank you so much for the ask I'm so happy you're liking what we're doing here and I hope you continue to share your thoughts and theories with this blog.

-Echo

[leslutdepointedulac]

*crashes through your door like big bird*

🗿 give us the rundown on how you got here! which was the first vc book you ever read? what made you decide to seek out vc fandom on tumblr?

Okay, buckle up ya'll because this is a decently long story.

So I would argue it actually started waaaayy back when I was a wee child, say about 6-7ish maybe. I would see the IWTV film on TV all the time and me being obsessed with vampires, I really wanted to watch it. Idk how I knew but somehow I had the knowledge that it was a very famous vampire story with queer characters and that it was supposed to be really good, so naturally I was like "I wanna watch that!" But my parents wouldn't let me because it's an 18 and I was a child (not that this stopped me fr begging them though lmao). This happened several times throughout my childhood and each time my parents would be like "No you're too young, you can watch it when you're older."

Skip to when I was around 15 I think, and I had this friend in school whose house I went to quite often. I was round for a sleepover one time and they told me there was this film with a banging soundtrack they wanted to show me. That film was QOTD. We watched it and I thought it was pretty decent (fyi I can't stand that film now, but the soundtrack still slaps. And Akasha! Aaliyah absolutely killed it!). When I went home the next day I told my parents what I had done at my friend's house, and that we had watched QOTD and they were like "Oh, the sequal to IWTV". Now bear in mind, I'd forgotten all about IWTV by this point and then it all came back to me and I was like "Omg no way!"

However, I still didn't watch IWTV and I forgot about it all over again. Until 2 years ago. I for the life of me cannot remember how or why I suddenly remembered it at the time, but I was chilling in bed and it came to me. So I found IWTV and watched it for the first time in my life (I was 19 at this point) and lemme tell you. It was worth waiting 19 years of my life. I loved it and thought how it was insane I'd only just now seen it, but better late than never.

Then I forgot about it again lmao. Until the 3rd November 2022. I remembered (again, idk how or why) that I had heard about an IWTV TV show so I found it and watched it and I thought "huh, that was pretty good. I like this!" And so I became obsessed.

Then I decided I wanted to read the books so in December of 2022 I bought IWTV, TVL and QOTD (it's all three in one book) and I started reading the series from the very beginning. I got even more obsessed and kept buying the series until I had them all and read through the whole thing.

In February on 2023 I joined tumblr for the VC fandom, because I had seen VCblr posts on Pinterest and thought it looked fun, so naturally I joined in.

And that more or less takes us up to now really lol. I'm still here and even more obsessed than ever. My obsession is primarily on the books since I read them. I kinda moved from the show to the books but I still have a deep appreciation for the show because that's what brought me here to the fandom in the first place. (And I still love the film too.)

I also recently, in the past couple of months, made friends with a group of people here in the fandom and I'm so glad to know them and be friends with them (including you, of course @hekateinhell 💖). I've been in many fandoms before this one, but this is the first one I've been so active in and the first one I've made friends in. I love ya'll, and I love talking to you all 🥰💕💕

Anyway, it's a long story as to how I got here 😅 It's like these vampires have always been in my life in one way or another.

Sorry this was such a ramble but yeah. There's practically my whole VC life story 😂

[celticwolf55]

It's really cool when writers have playlists for their fics cause then you see what fits woth the story and all. Fake it till you make it is the first of your fics I read and it's one of my favorites so it's nice to see that playlist.

I've never heard reckless driving before but it's really good. Like "guess I'd die to keep your eyes on me"? For wenclair? Breathtaking honestly. I've only heard one other song by this artist and theyre making me a fan of hers. The song is Hate to be lame in case you're interested.

And epic omg I first heard about it late 2021/early 2022 and I've been obsessed since. I've waited so long that I'm kinda sad it'll be over soon. Just a man is one of the best songs from epic. All the edits to it are so good they hurt. Ruthlessness has to be my favorite though cause that's where it finally hits them how screwed they are.

I'm left without a choice and without a doubt

Guess the pack of wolves is swimming with the shark now

I've gotta make you bleed, I need to see you drown

And

You are far too nice, mercy has a price

It's the final crack, we're bound to break the ice now

You reveal your name, then you let him live

Unlike you, I've got no mercy left to give 'cause

Ruthlessness is mercy upon ourselves

These lyrics are golden. Different beast is up there for me too. Do you have a favorite song or saga?

I know it's a lot, my bad, but in my defense wenclair and epic are my hyperfixations and together is even better.

I feel that having a playlist, even if I don't always listen to it when I'm writing, it really helps get me into the headspace of the story. Fake it is the first popular fic that people have read of mine, which is totally fair since my earlier stuff wasn't that great. And I'm glad that you enjoyed the playlist I put together for it.

Reckless driving was something I literally listened to on repeat for MONTHS because it was what gave the good creative juices for writing, and the beat was great as well when the lyrics just faded into the background in my braid. The lyrics also hit really hard too, so I totally get your reaction to them. I haven't heard the song you're talking about, but Ceilings was also a song I listened to on repeat for a similar reason.

Now to Epic. I found it mid to late last year I think. Back when the Cyclops saga was the most recent one out. All of the edits and animatics were so incredible as well, adding different things to the songs and elevating them in different ways too. Ruthless is an incredible song too. It's the first time that Odysseus has some really harsh consequences and it hardens him in general (apart from Polities' death). And yeah, you get to feel how badly he's messed up too. I also remember how incredible the goosebumps were when that scrapped song was going around 'Get in the water'. It was so intense.

You're totally fine. I like your enthusiasm. I just spent several hours making a video of about 3 years worth of artworks I've done for Wenclair to my recent stuff. Hopefully I get inspired into making more artworks to hopefully finish the song I have behind it.

[drunktuesdays]

omg I looooove Left Hand, I had to read it in college for a sci-fi class and I feel like my brain has been rewritten since. what was your favorite part??

i cannot believe i'd never read it before and i'm soooooo grateful for @vivathewilddog for recommending it. i've been making jokes for years about the sentinel being the foremother of modern omegaverse, but i had no idea that actually the foremother of omegaverse is URSULA LEGUIN. HAPPY.

My favorite part--okay actually i'm going to cut this because it's about incest even though i'm not actually talking about incest--well, you'll see what i mean.

“About two hundred years ago in the Hearth of Shath in the Pering Storm-border there were two brothers who vowed kemmering to each other. In those days, as now, full brothers were permitted to keep kemmer until one of them should bear a child, but after that they must separate; so it was never permitted them to vow kemmering for life. Yet this they had done. When a child was conceived the Lord of Shath commanded them to break their vow and never meet in kemmer again. ”

unfortunately i'm fucking OBSESSED with this and have been nonstop thinking about it. if you haven't read it, kemmer is basically heat. it's more complicated and nuanced than that, but for our purposes, it's going into heat. keeping kemmer is sharing a heat with somone. vowing kemmering is basically a mating bond/marriage/forever union. the only person you'll keep kemmer with. and t b q h, a transgressive relationship in which you can have sex as much as you want and share your heat with someone as long as you never take it seriously, and if you do take it seriously and fall in love, only then is the relationship banned is unfortunately the sexiest fucking thing i have ever heard. we should be writing more omegaverse fic where it's fine as long as it's casual!!!!!! you can change up what the transgression is--omega-omega relaysh or whatever. who cares. do you know how much i would run into TRAFFIC for a fic where two people are desperately clinging to the illusion that they're fucking for fun, because if either of them acknowledge it, they're in trouble? girl BYE.

[changingplumbob]

URL Song Tag Game

Thanks to being tagged by @seriallovertrait and @gamyrmaiden I get to bless you all with how eclectic my music taste really is. I'm going to tuck it all below the cut because my username is long.

Quick moment for all my beloved songs that start with s that won't be able to be mentioned 🕯️

Everyone who sees this is obviously tagged but I know not everyone is music mad. For some exact tags... @marcishaun, @sharona-sims, @daedriyth, @simslegacy5083, @aliengirl, @limeysims, @nigmos, @ethicaltreatmentofcowplants (feel free to shorten your username, or not, I'm not your boss), @eljeebee, @calicosimgirl, @mushbop. But EVERYONE is genuinely tagged because I'd put you all in if I could.

So, songs for the letters of my username below! Also including the lyrics I love because who am I if not someone who breaks the rules of tag games? Please don't feel like you have to do this level of detail, it's purely me making more work for myself.

EDIT: Omg and @matchalovertrait tagged me to but I missed it because I took so long doing this 🫠

C Curtains: Ed Sheeran

This one is my, I see the light at the end of my depression tunnel song. It came out just as my mental health was moving into a better place. Obviously I also love Ed Sheeran.

Can you pull the curtains, let me see the sunshine? I think I'm done with my hidin' place, and you found me anyway It's been forever, but I'm feelin' alright Tears dry and will leave no trace, and tomorrow's another day

H Heroes: David Bowie

I love David Bowie! This song is a classic and it always makes me happy.

I, I will be king And you, you will be queen Though nothing will drive them away We can be Heroes, just for one day

A All the King's Horses: Karmina

I am still obsessed with Reign. This song I actually heard and fell in love with before I saw it on the show though. It conveys such rich emotion. Seriously, if you only listen to one song from my post, make it this one. It makes me want to write every time I listen to it.

All the king's horses and all the king's men Couldn't put me back together again

There is a reason I'm still standing I never knew if I'd be landing And I will run fast, outlast Everyone that said no

N Never Enough: Loren Allred

I love musicals, though I'm not as obsessed as some. I really like the Greatest Showman and it has a bunch of great songs. This song always takes my breath away.

All the shine of a thousand spotlights All the stars we steal from the night sky Will never be enough Never be enough Towers of gold are still too little These hands could hold the world but it'll Never be enough Never be enough

G Gold Forever: The Wanted

My boyband phase was The Wanted rather than One Direction. I love Gold Forever, and hearing it gives me all the nostalgic high school feelings. I still can't believe Tom is dead.

Promise me, you'll stay the way you are Keep the fire alive and stay young at heart When the storm feels like it could blow you out Remember, you got me and I got you

'Cause we are butterflies, butterflies, we were meant to fly You and I, you and I, colors in the sky When the innocence is dead and gone These will be the times we look back on

I It Won't Be Long Now: In the Heights Original Motion Picture Cast

I love so many songs from this film, some days I will just listen to the album on loop for hours. This one is a favourite, along with Blackout and Champagne.

The neighborhood salon doesn't pay me what I wanna be making but I don't mind As I sweep the curb I can hear those turbo engines blazing a trail through the sky I look up and think about the years gone by But one day I'm walking to JFK and I'm gonna fly!

N Nothing Left to Lose: Jeremy Jordan and Eden Espinosa

Yes this song is from the Tangled animated TV series. I see no problems. These two are great singers and honestly I could just copy/paste all the song lyrics because it's great.

So I chose To lose my doubts and lose my chains Lose each weakness that remains Now that I have nothing left to lose Nothing left to lose

G Give Me Your Hand: The Ready Set

This is one that gets stuck in my head easily but I actually fell in love with it because the lyric video for it is singing the song in sign language! We love inclusion and accessibility here!

She said 'I love this song I've heard it before and it stole my heart I know every word' She's gonna dance all night night, Till it hurts Singing the best song ever, best song ever!

P Playground: High Dive Heart

I like a bunch of songs by High Dive Heart and was stoked this one could fit on the list! I love it because I'm a senimental sap at heart and the whole song is a nostalgic dream of what made our childhood before we grew up and had to tackle the real world.

That's why they call e'm the good ole days Taking on the world cause we weren't afraid Jumping off rooftops in our skates Cause we didn't know we could break If I knew then, what I know right now I would've stayed on the playground I left my heart in the lost and found I should've stayed on the playground

L Life On Mars: David Bowie

Another Bowie song? YES! When I play his legacy album and get to this one I often have to put it on single song repeat for a while.

Sailors fighting in the dance hall Oh man, look at those cavemen go It's the freakiest show Take a look at the lawman Beating up the wrong guy Oh man, wonder if he'll ever know He's in the best selling show Is there life on Mars?

U Unapologize: Carrie Underwood

I am a romantic so of course I'm going to love this song.

I unapologize I meant every word Won't take back the way I feel about you Can't unsay what you heard

'Cause you heard me right, and I won't try To fight 'em back or hide my feelings for you I unapologize

M Monster Under My Bed: Bebe Rexha

You know that song The Monster sung by Eminem and Rihanna? Well Bebe Rexha wrote it! I love her solo version, not to rain on the rap version obviously, but I love her early music.

In a world so black and white Out of place and out of my mind Woke up and I realized Imperfection is divine

B Babe: Taylor Swift

So I heard the Sugarland version featuring Taylor Swift, loved it, adored the music video! Then Red (Taylor's Version) came out and I learned she actually wrote it? I love it.

I'm here on the kitchen floor You call, but I won't hear it You said no one else We ain't getting through this one, babe I break down every time you call We're a wreck, you're the wrecking ball You said no one else This is the last time I'll never call you, babe

O On Melancholy Hill: Gorillaz

I heard this one first when playing Life is Strange 2 and I love it. The rhythm is soothing to my brain.

Where you can't get what you want But you can get me So let's set out to sea, love 'Cause you are my medicine When you're close to me

B Brave, Honest, Beautiful: Fifth Harmony ft Meghan Trainor

I was never obsessed with Fifth Harmony but during university I did have a rough time and there was a bunch of their singles I'd listen to on loop to lift my spirits. This was one.

You can dance like Beyoncé You can shake like Shakira 'Cause you're brave, yeah You're fearless and you're beautiful, you're beautiful

So whine like Rihanna Go and pose like Madonna 'Cause you're brave, yeah You're honest and you're beautiful, you're beautiful, girl

[ryansjane]

GMMTV randomized shipping wheel

so I couldn't sleep bc I had a uni interview lol, so I thought "why not put the 100 current gmmtv actors on a randomized wheel to create random pairings that I can in turn rate & judge?" so,,, um... here we go 😅

here are the 10 first ships that were created, if you like this I'll make a part 2 bc it's too much fun:

LOUIS X ARM

honestly I don't think it would be a bad ship per say bc arm has proved with friend zone & never too late that he's a great actor who honestly should get more roles, and louis is also pretty solid & gets along with everyone, so... this is not a crazy idea in my eyes but also this would be a very unexpected ship so idk, 6/10

NAMTAN X MOOK

so here's the thing, I'm so desperate for gl I'd be down for ANY wlw pairing lmao 😆 also namtan & mook are both very good actresses so I'm sure they'd do amazing! my only issue is that they do look very similar & in general couples are more interesting visually if they kinda are opposites, but also queer people often date their lookalikes so it wouldn't be too crazy lol, 7/10

JUNIOR X CHIMON

hmm... I don't really see this lol. I think junior has tried doing bl many times before joining gmmtv & he's not that good in romantic settings imo (though I might be biased bc one of his bl roles was him faking a ship with yoon in the graduate where he looked like such an awkward hetero lol.) but the thing is, chimon also kinda has that vibe? I think he's definitely gotten better but the straight vibes are still poking through for chimon imo, so him & junior together would be too much. but honestly if they were given the chance I can also see them completely surprise me so I'll give them 4/10

THOR X GUNSMILE

bro 💀 this is the weirdest pairing ever lmao, first of all I've always struggled to see gunsmile doing bl, like I think it would require the exact right pairing for him to do great at it & not look awkward, so thor?? noooope! I liked thor in the warp effect but he gives too much hetero vibes for me once again, so him & gunsmile would literally make the straightest bl couple ever lmao 1/10

AJ X PRIGKHING

I love them both so much so I can see it! as an ajploy shipper, obviously they wouldn't be my ultimate pairing, but prikhing is adorable & I think they'd make the cutest little side pairing, 8/10

AOU X LUKE

........... actually? 👀 I don't mind this. like my first thought was "wtf" but then I imagined them next to each other & I think their height/size difference would be cute! I also think aou is a very good actor who has impressed me a lot in all the roles I've seen him in! as for luke, I'm gonna be honest I don't really see him doing bl & he needs to work on his acting, but I've seen stranger things happen in this fandom so never say never :') 6.5/10

WIN X TITLE

now, once again, my first thought was "wtf 💀", but then I removed win from his status as incredibly famous & placed him back right before 2gether aired, and? honestly that ship could work? I imagine them in an aepete from love by chance type of innocent relationship, and I think physically they'd be a good looking ship together. though I can't imagine their chemistry or acting together so I'll give them a 6/10

(also why did title fucking SNAP with this pic omg)

NICKY X MIX

💀💀💀😆😆😆 nah bro THIS is the worst pairing I've ever heard of lmaoooo 😭 mix could've chemistry with anyone but nicky??? doing bl??? I could maybe envision him as a side ship with his bff leo but HELL NO 😭 bless nicky he's a comedic icon but nope, 0/10

LEO X LUKE

listen idk why that wheel is obsessed with luke but NOPE. like I can't imagine these two even PRETENDING to like each other, like... it's just too random atp 💀 maybe as a comedic side side side side SIDE ship, but overall, 2/10

VICTOR X FLUKE GAWIN

LMAOOOOOOO 😭 like I can't see this ship at all but tell me why I would 10000% prefer this ship to gawinkrist 😭 5/10

[derangedfujoshi]

Hello, I just wanted to tell you that your Malevolent posting convinced me to listen to it almost immediately. The promise of a problematic ship got me in the door, and the emotional impact you spoke about it having shoved me the rest of the way into the room. I'm almost done with season 1 already and I'm loving it so much. I am fucking obsessed with the John/Arthur dynamic, and it's actually difficult for me to see how one could *not* interpret this as romantic in some way lmao It's honestly giving me so much life (and I'm having one of those times where I really needed something to do just that). I had never heard of it before, so thank you for posting about it!! 💕😻💗💓💖💞

WAAAAAAAH OMG AHSJDJFKFK YES GOOD LISTEN TO MALEVOLENT!! TELL ME ALL YOUR THOUGHTS PLEEEAAAASEE

okok I'm normal ahem... I'm really glad my silly ramblings caught your attention! I've discovered this podcast I think more than a year ago(?) and used to listen to it religiously every day while going to work. Most of the times I'd end up sitting on one of the benches inside a small church while listening to it before my shift, it was An Experience. I remember it captivating me immediately with the writing and characters and oh the story! And while I think that Jarthur as a queerplatonic relationship is so good and so valid, I cannot help myself from shipping them romantically because they are SO up my alley, ESPECIALLY after s2. Oh man. Season 2- from what I've seen is the least popular one but to me? Oh to me that's the best one and I'm warning you, get some tissues ready for that season finale. You'll need em.

They love each other they just dooo but they're oh so messy and faulty and fucked in the head and so... so human. I'm so pissed I lost my old blog forever because I had posted my reactions to all the seasons' endings and more shippy stuff, sigh... Well I'll make MORE now since I've officially restarted it-

Anyway sorry for rambling ahdkfkcl again SO happy you ended up enjoying something I, in a way, recommend! It is indeed not that "popular" as in, you don't really hear about it online as much as, idk, the magnus archives, so I'll forever be grateful to have found it and for others to LISTEN TO ME AND JOIN ME IN JARTHUR HELL!!!!

I hope you'll find it more and more interesting as the story progresses and that it will keep on giving you life just like it did with me back then. Please do tell me everything about it if you so wish!

Thank you so much for this ask it made me very happy💕💕

[baekhvuns]

HIIII BAEKSSSSS I missed you 😔 how are you? Wsp? How's everything?

Man, I've been pretty peaceful I'd say..kinda idk. Maybe the calm before the storm but that's besides the point. I miss your work so so so much 🥹🥹🥹 like rlly, not wanting to pressurise you just GIRL RLLY MADE 2022 SUCH A GOOD EXPERIENCE.

Anyways I've been watching a ton of stuff ofc, found a new pakistani drama 😈😈 well it's kind of the same plot as u wld guess, but I like this one it's like if not a lot then a bit diff frm the same ass dynamic. It's like a first daughter x youngest son the fun part is it was supposed to be, first daughter x first son but he was a jerk and a red flag. So yes...it'd be fun, it's a silly dynamic imo ik for sure there are going to be a ton banters.

ALSO dude these asmr Rps be getting Outta hand 😭 Nah cz i cried. I CRIED. THE ANGST OHHHHH. Some asmr artists are just so fucking good like alanakamakwk i felt like I was in a movie.

Lemme tell u a bit abt it, so the concept was basically, an old bsf comes back into the listener's life not in a bad way or anything just cz the bsf lived farrrrr away.

"do you wanna see the new tattoo i got?"

LIKE OKAY and then we did trace them too and a while later the convo goes deep "i got this tattoo bcz u told me seven years ago, what you don't rmr?" And then he sort of reminisces over the old times

"and that day..I went home, and texted you how much I liked you. And wanted to hang out with you a bunch.."

"that didn't happen I never texted you."

BRO OMG OMG ONWKWJWKW IM TELLING YOU THE FREAKIN TENSION BW ME AND MY HEADPHONES.

And then the best part was the listeners bf calls who also used to be friends with the bsf, and goes "i love you."

In hopes of hearing it frm us too. "Dear...?" Silence.

NO CUZ IMAGINE STANDING IN FRONT OF SOMEONE U ACTUALLY LOVE AND U GOTTA SAY ILY TO YOUR BF WHAT??? OMG.

And then when he comes out to go run errands he talks to the bsf AKA THE ASMR ARTIST I TELL U HIS VOICE *melts*

"we'll see you right?"

"... farewell"

That's the visual representation of me I'm not even kidding. And....he just leaves. LIKE THAT?? WHAT ABOUT US AHHHH *dies*

Nah but yes, I've been obsessed now. At least it makes me feel something 😮‍💨

Ok also no way my old Bollywood obsession is dying anytime soon *listens to bol na halke halke*

Anyways bye bye baeks MAKE SURE TO TELL ME ABT YOURSELF HOW U DOING AND STUFF OK?? OK MWAH ILY 🤭

YOU SENT THIS LAST WEEK AND I JUST KIND OF LOGGED INFBWNDBSK SO SORRY

i hope you’re doing well!! i’m currently sick bc of a heatwave i caught at a wedding 🥰🥰

i’m glad you’re feeling peaceful! AND DHSKDHKW DONT MENTION IT FNDMSKC ITS BEEN 2 YEARS 😭😭😭 maybe my writing bug just dimmed LMFAOOOO haven’t been on here or read anything, ive been in my drafts just giggling and reading but never like posting or writing fbdndb but ive kind of, maybe wanting to write something for fall time which i’m not sure ill post but it’s got me smiling a bit!

WHAT IS THE SHOW TELL ME 🔫

omg i can never get behind asmr, i have this thing called misophonia, i just despise the way the arm sounds make my ears feel fmandksb i just feel triggered BUT U CRIED BC OF IT WHY 😭😭

u gotta send me the link of it bc the voice actor u say… 👁

does our bollywood obsession rly die 😭😭 the new tauba tauba got me going a bit crazy,,, heard the jannat bgm but sad version and iM OBSESSED WITH IT, it lowkey inspired me to think and write <3 got me giggling and imaging stuff <3 in my pillow fbwndbsj

[remcycl333]

honestly, i'm thankful to the people on twt who criticised you for your distraction technique... BECAUSE THIS LED ME TO FIND YOUR POST ABOUT IT AND IT SOUNDS SO FUCKING COOL?!?!?! i follow you for a while but for some reason i never heard of it before. i have been in the manifestation community since i was a preteen (i'm 20 now) and i'm SOOOOO sick and tired of both the attraction and assumption people bc how much they overcomplicate manifestation 😭 i'm not even joking when I say this probably messed up my mental health and gave me a trauma or two. not to mention how this causes people's journeys to be longer and harder than they need to be. i have been wanting so badly to find a technique that is simple yet empowering and i think yours is the one! i can relate so much to your struggles with the obsession people have with affirming nonstop. only if you don't mind of course, could you please ever make a post sharing your success stories with this technique? sorry if this ask sounds too exciting but i genuinely loved discovering this lol also fuck the twitter morons 💓💓💓

omg im so happy to hear that! 🤍 the reason i started using this technique was bc i was in that phase where i thought i had to affirm 24/7 to get what i wanted, and if my shit hadn't manifested yet i'd think it was bc i hadn't affirmed enough. and i remember it was making me miserable cuz i'd look at everyone else (who didn't know abt the law) and feel kinda jealous that they could enjoy their life without having to consciously affirm every single second of the day. which as i'd been doing that for months to no avail, i was seriously burnt out and upset. and then i watched dylan james' youtube videos and he suggested not affirming and just not thinking about your desire at all (aka what i called the distraction technique) and at first i thought that was so fucking crazy bc it went against everything i had learned (from s*mmy ofc). but i tried it and a few hours later my sp (who i had been manifesting for months) finally texted me! and i've been using that technique to manifest everything ever since <3

if people want to affirm constantly that's totally cool but it simply was not for me and i think it's so dumb that the twitter hoes are trying to invalidate that

[lansplaining]

Wait are we doing Yunmeng Shuangjie song asks? Can I submit "The Moon Will Sing" by The Crane Wives for sad golden core times and "eight" by Sleeping At Last for some post-canon gearing-themselves-up-to-attempt-reconciliation-after-spending-some-time-apart-to-heal?

omg I'm obsessed with The Moon Will Sing, I have it on like three character song lists right now

all the verses are perfect and could apply to either of them!! which is so great!! but like

Tell me once again I could have been anyone, anyone else Before you made the choice for me My feet knew the path We walked in the dark, in the dark I never gave a single thought to where it might lead

i'd never heard this one before! ahhh!!!! i love it!

You were wrong, you were wrong, you were wrong My healing needed more than time

I am strong, I am strong, I am strong enough To let you in

!!!

[absolutebl]

Hello, how are you? First of all, I want to say, thank you so much for this blog of yours, AbsoluteBL....Because of you I know more about BL in general and the history behind it.....Your analysis are amazing and easy to read and to be understood (sorry English is not my native language)....I also love reading your recommendations and discussion.....Before I found this blog, I never watched any Thai drama, but you changed me.... Thanks...

Do you mind if I ask your opinion on something? I noticed that you are a book lover and a fast reader, so what do you think, about western MLM stories? What makes Asian BL better than western MLM stories? I don't mean to talk negatively but i want to read your opinion about it (because I love reading your writings)....

Before I watched Asian BL, I already read books and watch movies or series that contains MLM, but it just hit differently somehow (I don't know how to express what I mean).....

Most of otps that I love from western series or movies are bromance or male best friends that I love the chemistry, and for series that have canon MLM couple, I don't really ship them, not like in Asian BL...(I dont know why, maybe you have an idea ir two, why is that)....

Oh, do you mind if I gave you books recommendations? They are not long at all and a quick reading (especially since you are a fast reader), have you read "All For The Game" trilogy by Nora Sakavic or "Captive Prince" by trilogy by C.S.Pacat (the author said herself, that she was inspired by BL manga when wrote this books, and I think you will love them) ? Those are my top favorite MLM books....

Sorry for this long ask, feel free if you want to ignore it....Thanks again for your hard works in this blog....Hope you have a wonderful day.....

Hi, OMG you are so nice and I am abotu to get so salty! I love you and, I’m sorry? 

MM BOOKS

I would say at a general guess (looking at my old Goodreads account) I've read about 1000 mm romances. (before you get mad I’d say about 300 ff, 400 alt queer of soem kind, and way way way more than that het). And that’s just romance. I used to average between 300-500 books a year. And yes, I’m a speed reader. And yes, I retain very very little of it. 

So yeah.

I don't read them much anymore. Most mm went into KU over the last 4 years and I don't play that game. Plus I'd rather watch and talk about BL these days than read anything I’m not obligated to for work.

Sorry but I loathed Pacat's Captive Prince. Just like Red, White & Royal Blue a few years later it was as if everyone suddenly felt compelled to read and "discover" mm with that series and I DO NOT GET THE APPEAL. I come originally out of SFF and the world building was so poor, the Ds dynamic was unresolved and lacklustre (possibly because it was seme/uke, which now knowing might make it more palatable to me but, shrug, too late), the writing quality was not great, and I disliked most of the characters. Honestly, it reminded me of 1980s Sharon Green or Joanna Lindsey, just profoundly dated in its sensibility and clumsy with its trope execution. Like it was written by someone who had read very little romance or fantasy, but maybe a few 1970s pirate rape books.

And you thought I could only get this mean about Mame!

Just look at me go when books are one the line.

I think Pacat is like KinnPorsche, the people who like it are obsessed and the rest of us are like... but there's so much better stuff out there, why don't you... no? Okay then. Just, please stop talking about it?

As for Sakavic I don't read mafia and I don't read sports so I'm afraid I probably won't bother. Honestly, though, with these two as your top picks have you heard of Jex Lane's Beautiful Monsters? Although I'm not sure they finished writing the series, I gave up waiting.

I suppose I have probably scared you off now?

Look, everyone likes what they like and my reading taste is about as quirky as my drama taste, if not more so.

What do you care what I think?

I'm a grape soda person.

I don't like sourdough bread.

ooo, ooo!

White chocolate is a perfectly serviceable version of chocolate.

We all have our quirks.