#i'll commit to this until the end
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assuming nothing gets rearranged, at most six (6) eggs seem to fit this table. It appears that chapters 6 and 7 will be something completely different from what we've had so far, given that Gerson doesn't foreshadow them, and Seam only predicts 5 Shadow Crystals in total.
With that, this random Berdly egg feels added here just so our egg count could be exactly six (6). A number that could mean nothing.
#deltarune#deltarune chapter 4#deltarune spoilers#gaster#listen. there's some stuff of the chapter 3 egg encounter that makes it shaky to assume the forgotten man is gaster#i am. however. in too deep for the past seven years#i'll commit to this until the end
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June pt. 2
#2nd day/part of this#Ended up coloring this one (I'm starting to get used to aseprite and its tools). Gradient tool and 2x2 brush my beloved.#I'm staying away from shading until I can actulally place shadows correctly#One of my favorite parts of the game (from my favorite route)#Didn't know if I wanted to put the backers' characters (CJ and Michelle) or to keep them for day 3.#Ended up doodling the two as I have a few more charcters for this month...#Anyways... Jackie and Bombshell!!!#Jackie is one of my favorites (even if she appears twice in the whole game).#This is a few hours after Mae and Bea left btw#I'm sure Jackie is super happy to talk about her best friend Samantha Stevenson!#Remebered to put my signature this time because I felt silly#There's only the cat now.#I should start to add immage IDs to these before they become too many#Also I could (and maybe should) write my thoughts on the text-part of the post#but writing in the tags feels different so I'll problably stick to the tags#I also don't know if I should give a title to each and every drawing (30 drawings if I commit until the end) but can't think of anything#oh well#nitw#night in the woods#june art#art#nitw fanart
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can you even belieeeeeve that i am almost done w the buttonband on jake's sweater. then in its just one more sleeve and done babey!!!!
#well weave in ends then done babey!!!!!#it still probably wont be done by tomorrow. but honestly if i pushed really hard and knitted until work today and until the party tmrw#then i could probably finish it at the expense of my hands#after i finish this i shall make some hand warmers for jake's mom and then i think i will crochet a pillow cover for his brother#and then i will see if jake's mom likes the color of yarn i have for a shawl and if she does make her a shawl#if she doesnt ill make a shawl for me and order a color she DOES like to make her one#and when i order yarn i will probably get enough to make myself another pullover sweater and a cardigan of my own.#and if im brave i'll ask jake's mom and brother if they like the kind of yarn i made his cardigan out of and then commit to eventually makin#g matching sweaters for the 4 of us.#i need to figure out next year's knitting plans/queue in detail.....i still want to make myself a black sweater vest and need to finish my#second silk t shirt. and i do want to make another lightweight sweater for fall next year#we shall see w grad school starting in january...#t
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you ever have adhd and commitment issues but you decide that you can read one piece in the span of two months?
#totally not me#I have until the end of october#Or i'll be sad#I'm on book 13#Hopefully i can do it#one piece#Manga#Anime#eiichiro oda#adhd#actually ocd#commitment issues#nerodivergent
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put a polyester dress on (oh i LOOKED for one that wasn't when i was buying it!) and suddenly i can hear static every time i move like i'm ragnarok!thor at last manifesting my full polyester dress powers.
#NOOO THOR! keep looking until you find something made of cotton! it's not worth it! it's not even that nice and it's too long!#(it's probably not too long if you're 6ft 4 but i am not)#(thor would not have to be wearing platform trainers with this dress. i am aware of that fact. i may not like it but i'm aware of it.)#meanwhile the one dress that wasn't polyester has committed the rare sin of Genuinely Unslightly Pockets which seems somehow worse?#of course the polyester one has no pockets! why would anyone need pockets when they have an electromagnetic field!#do humans already have one of those? i feel like we might. but it's not a STUPID one. it's not ANNOYING.#at least i'll be protected from solar flares in this!#i'm possibly going to end up changing out of this before i pikachu myself or someone else to death by touching a metal object D:#i have so many regrets 😭#i was like “no just this once i am sure the 100% polyester fabric will be fine. it looks nice on the model. she's not visibly crackling.”#it does feel quite nice aside from all the static electricity but oh my god the static electricity.
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WHAT?! It's morning! I lost time. Things got a little heated— With a boy! Things got heated with a boy. I was at home picking lint off the sofa! I said to join us! The night's gone. The room's soiled and once again, I'm here with mop and mindlessness to clean it up. So the room got dirty, so what? I'll clean it up. No, I clean it up! You make the mess and I clean it up! Mark it on the calendar, align it with Ursa Major. Louis' tri-annual FUCK OFF and find me with apologies to follow. I'm sorry. SEEK comfort in the arms of lowlifes and unfortunates, and broken children, fine. Oh, fine! The fine that doesn't sound fine— But REVEALING our nature to a reporter you met in a bar ten hours ago? What if it was published? I was having some fun! You don't have enough to fear from Paris? I was in the middle of ending things, when YOU— YOU'D have been passed out on the floor next to him, Louis! Out on your feet from the drugs you stuffed him with! Oh, this is boring! You're boring! YOU ARE SO BORING! And here come the drugs. Colorless. Up the fangs, down the throat. Flavorless. Dull! Into the heart and off with the fingers, feet. Dull! Dull nights! And wallowing brain. Dull weeks, dull months, DULL AS FUCK! Suffocation by the world's softest, beige-est pillow! The ten hours I spent with that boy were more exciting, more FASCINATING, than DECADES with YOU! Oh, there it is! The half-blank, half-apocalyptic look! But what does it mean tonight, huh? Does he want to lick my boots or chop my hands off? Is it the gremlin or the good nurse tonight? Huh? Okay. Okay, perhaps. But am I as boring as the blather committed onto the ferric tapes of your fascinating boy? "Oh, it's so, so hard to be me." "Picking lint off the sofa?!" "It's so hard to kill humans." "I can feel their feelings as I drain them." You sat on your hands and put your ear to the wind. "Everyone I know wronged me." Okay. Okay, let's wake the boy up and let's try you. "I'm the vampire Armand and my daddy vampire groomed me into a little BITCH!" "My brother he tossed himself off a roof!" "Vampires who murdered my daddy made me pretend I didn't have a dick for 240 years." "My sister buried me alive. My daughter was my sister was my throw pillow. Well, he wouldn't look at me kindly. Lestat. Lestat. Lestat. Lestat. Lestat. Lestat. Lestat. Lestat. Lestat. Lestat. Lestat. Lestat. Lestat. Lestat. Lestat. Lestat." I talked shit about him the whole time. So what?! THE NAME!! The name! Unuttered in our home for 23 years, said over and over again until it was pounding in my brain like a hammer. Our problems aren't about him. And you threw her name around just for cover, but it always circled back to him. I loved her. But SHE didn't love YOU. Not like he did, not like I have. I know. I know! Yes! I know. Thank you for saying it. It's all creeping back. Paris and the, uh, what, what, what? But there's... all of it coming back. There's, uh, Paris. Paris. Can you hear that? Can you hear that, hm? Can you hear her? She's calling me.
#interview with the vampire#iwtv#amc iwtv#iwtv amc#louis de pointe du lac#armand le russe#armand iwtv#iwtv armand#armand#loumand
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vi x f!reader
a/n: i love needy vi. she's so touch-starved.
"you're so sexy."
"thank you, baby."
"like...how are you real?"
you stifle a laugh, trying to focus on the essay you're trying to write. but it's significantly hard when vi's doing everything she can to distract you. like how her head conveniently finds its way onto your laptop's keyboard. you sigh in resignation when your documents closes after the keyboard spits out a bunch of gibberish.
thank goodness for autosave.
"baby," vi whines, staring up at you with those puppy dog eyes. they're too adorable for their own good; they're capable of either ending or starting all wars. "pay attention to me. i miss my wife."
"we're not married," you say, just because it's fun to see vi's nose scruch up in disgust at that sentence. "and i've got to finish this essay if i want to pass this class."
"yeah, but you can take like an hour away from it," vi bargins, twisting herself until her face is nuzzled in your stomach. "just indulge me. indulge your wife."
you giggle, running gentle fingers through her hair. "not wife. we're not married." you repeat.
vi bites at your stomach, and you yelp. "i'll commit a crime if you say that again," she warns, making you laugh wholeheartedly. "just...stay with me for now. just for a few minutes."
you stare at vi before looking at your laptop. then you wiggle it out from vi's head and close it shut, putting it to the side.
taking some time off won't hurt.
"okay," you concede, feigning exasperation. "cuddle me then—whoa!"
a happy vi's already full-body tackled you flat on the couch.
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My Gamer Wife
Miyawaki Sakura x Male Reader
Sequel to King of Oshiri
Tags: A2M, anal creampie, (lots of) anal, asshole fingering, birthday, couch sex, cum on glasses, dildo, full nelson, gamer girl, gape, hotwife, joysticks (literally and figuratively), livestream, losing a bet, pile driver, sex on camera, (lots of) squirting, video games
Word count: 5779
In many ways, Sakura is the perfect wife. She gives you all the attention you need, invites her friends to have fun with you, and always does everything she can to satisfy you.
Except when it comes to those damn video games.

"Happy birthday, baby girl," you said to Sakura, but she ignored you. Once she put on those headphones and started playing games, it was over; she would not listen to anyone in her vicinity. Sakura was truly addicted to gaming, more than she was to you.
Sakura began her birthday livestream, saluting the massive audience she had earned over the course of her career and that now followed her gamer girl ventures. You looked at her, yet she was more worried about beating her high score in Overwatch than anything about you until she finally decided to switch that.
"Hubby, wanna play some games with me?" Sakura asked you. "Sure," you answered her, even though her obsession with gaming many times irritated you. You grabbed another joystick, even though the gap between your and her gaming skills was so massive all that was going to happen was her humiliating you in front of a huge online crowd.
"Yes," Sakura cheered as she easily defeated you. "Come on," you said, getting angry as your wife destroyed you. "Don't get angry, hubby; you just have to try harder," Sakura told you. "What are we even playing for? We should be celebrating your birthday, just you and I, none of that gaming bullshit," you told her.
"So you need an incentive, huh?" Sakura said. "My hubby really doesn't know how to play games; he needs an incentive," she continued, addressing the audience. "Guys, I'll be back soon; maybe he'll have an extra incentive once I return," she continued as she exited the frame. You looked at the messages in the livestream, all wanting you to get out and begging for Sakura to come back.
Sakura indeed came back, wearing a pair of glasses, a slim top, and gym shorts that made her look extremely hot while barely covering her bottom. "So, guys, I decided to have a bet with my hubby," Sakura said. "If I win, I get to fuck his ass, but if he wins, he gets to fuck my ass," Sakura said, shaking her cheeky butt to the camera. "I guess that's a bet I can accept," you tell your wife.
You and Sakura play a head-to-head match, her shaking her ass in front of you as a distraction. "You're obstructing my view," you tell her. "Am I?" Sakura asks as she delivers you a killer blow. "Are they crazy?" one comment asks. But you stay committed, taking Sakura's ass out of your sight.
But Sakura doesn't seem to get the memo, sitting on your lap to distract you while you two keep playing. "Come on, Kkura, can you fucking behave? There are lots of people watching; if you don't, I'm gonna shut this stream down and fuck your ass right now," you tell her. "That's not the deal we signed, hubby," she answers you.
But you manage to prevail even amidst Sakura's distractions, defeating her in a gaming battle for like the first time in ages. "Looks like my incentive paid off; he always loses to me, but as soon as my ass was on the line, he played like never before," Sakura says. "She lost on purpose," one comment says, unmasking Sakura's little facade.
"Ok, I won now. I think you should end this stream and fuck me. Your fans are probably finding it weird that you're talking about sex in the middle of playing those video games," you tell Sakura. "Not so fast, hubby, you won the bet, but today is my birthday, so I'm the one who dictates how you fuck me in the ass," Sakura answers.
"And how are we gonna do that?" you ask Sakura. "In front of all this audience, I want them to see how wild we are together," Sakura says. "Is she really gonna fuck him live on camera?" one comment asks, still in disbelief.
Sakura grabs the joystick and starts grinding on your lap, hitting higher scores the faster she moves. "Seems like she loves to play when horny," a comment says as Sakura keeps moving her hips, moaning softly as you grab her waist while she plays; keep the things going for a while. "Pull my shorts down," she tells you as you oblige, leaving Sakura wearing just a thong at the bottom of her body, showcasing her not so long but still beautiful legs.
Sakura hides the bottom of both your bodies, bringing a blanket that was on the side of the couch as you pull your pants down. She moans and makes moves that look like she's bouncing on your cock but lets the audience guess whether it's true or not. "Is she riding his dick?" one comment asks as Sakura moans.
"Ahhhh, ahhhh, ahhhh, ahhhh," Sakura continues to softly moan and bounce; you grab her ass as she keeps performing for the cameras, moving your hips to thrust upward into her pussy. "FUCK," Sakura moans, almost dropping the act as you hit deeper in her pussy but staying composed and scoring new highs at the game.
Sakura removes the blanket, showing your cock was inside her pussy this whole time. "Ahhhh, ahhhh, fuck me, fuck me, hubby, oh my god," she moans as she rides your cock in front of the online audience for a bit, you spanking her ass shortly after to signal you're done.
Sakura gets on her knees and sucks your cock. "Time for some live blowjob," she tells the audience, jerking and sucking your cock off like a truly professional slut, making loud noises doing so. "Oh my fucking god," you say as she deepthroats your dick and spits all over it.
You slap your cock in Sakura's face, her making crazy expressions for the audience watching while sucking your cock. "You're such a loud bitch," you tell her as you grab her hair and fuck her face, putting your shaft on the side of her cheeks while she dives to suck your balls.
"Hubby, sit down; I want to see you doing a challenge," Sakura says. "What kind of challenge?" you ask her. "Here, grab the joystick while I suck your big joystick. Let's see how well you can do with your wife blowing you off in front of a crowd," she says.
"I'm so wet right now, so turned on," Sakura says as she pulls her thong to the side and fingers her pussy before diving down to suck your cock. "Oh my God. You're fucking insane for doing this, you know?" you ask her. "Yes, I'm insane for that big nice cock," Sakura says.
"I can't wait to have it inside me again, especially in my ass," Sakura says as she bobs her head harder on your cock. "You're getting quite distracted, not paying much attention to that game right now, are you?" Sakura asks, ramping up the intensity of her blowjob.
"You're really losing your concentration, hubby, aren't you?" Sakura asks. "You really have the best cock ever," she continues, moving her head even faster on it. "I'm gonna get this cock nice and wet to fuck me; it's going to slide so easy in my pussy, baby," she says, moving like crazy on it, deepthroating your shaft countless times as your concentration goes further away.
Sakura can no longer resist her urge, sitting her pussy on your cock and blocking your view. "Oh, I love using that cock so much," she says, rubbing her pussy as she goes back to riding it. "Oh right there, that's what I fucking want, your big fucking cock inside me, hubby, yesss, make me cum, let me use it," Sakura says.
"I'm so horny now, oh fuck," Sakura moans as she picks up the speed riding your cock. "I think you're gonna have to choose, hubby, this video game or my pussy, because I'm gonna keep riding you, yeah, yeah, yeah," she says. "Oh fuck," Sakura moans as she spins on your cock. "OH YES, OH YES, OH YES," she loudly moans, letting her audience know how good she's feeling.
"You're doing good in that game; it turns out my pussy is a great incentive for you, hubby," Sakura says. "I guess I need to bounce harder," she continues, doing just what she vowed to do.
"Give me this," Sakura says as she picks the game controller from your hands and delivers another wonderful display of gaming. "She might be the best gamer in the world when she gets a big joystick up in her pussy," someone in the chat comments.
"OH YEAH, OH YEAH, OH SHIT," Sakura screams as she squirts hard while reaching another high score. "Damn, she's got a whole fountain in her pussy," someone comments. She lies on the couch and lets you eat her pussy while she keeps playing. "Oh yes, hubby, taste those juices; I love when you do that to me," she says.
Sakura squirts all over your face. "Oh yeah, don't stop, baby, lick that pussy," she begs as you dive all over it, paying special attention to her meaty clit. "Oh my god, yes, that's perfect; you're doing so good, hubby," Sakura says as she almost drops the controller. "Oh fuck, oh yeah, yeah, I'm gonna keep playing; push me to the next level," Sakura begs.
Sakura sits on your face, performing a 69 while still playing. You put a couple of fingers in her asshole, prompting her to immediately react. "AHHHH," she screams. "Calm down baby, this prize is for later," she then says, before going back to bob her head on your cock.
"You like that, don't you?" you ask Sakura as you put your middle finger deeper in her anus. "AHHHHH," Sakura moans. "That's all I need to know," you tell her as you keep eating her pussy and fingering her butthole, Sakura answering by choking hard on your cock while playing with the controller. "Oh shit," you groan. "Oh my god," she groans.
"Take those shorts off," you tell Sakura as you increase the pace of the finger-fucking in her asshole. She obliges, leaving you just with your t-shirt while she stays, sucking your cock and massaging your balls. "Fuck, baby," Sakura says as she bounces her ass in your face and her head on your cock, you tonguing her pussy hard.
Sakura rides you in reverse now, you now placing your thumb in her asshole while she bounces on your cock. "Oh, I'm so wet, yes, yes, that's so good; put that finger up in my ass," she begs. "Oh, that ass feels so fucking tight," you tell her as she continues to ride, choking her and slapping her face. "My wife is such a fucking whore," you say to her.
Sakuke claps her cheeks against your hips. "OH, IT FEELS SO FUCKING GOOD BOUNCING ON THAT COCK," she screams. "PUT YOUR FINGER IN THERE," she begs as you match her ride by spanking and finger-fucking her ass. "YEAH, YEAH, YEAH," she moans, spreading her legs and letting you thrust up. "FUCK HUBBY, FUCK THAT PUSSY, AHHH," she continues to scream.
"I love bouncing up and down on that cock," Sakura says as she moves faster than ever, you grabbing and spanking her butt. "YES, BABY, FUCK," she screams again before pulling out of your cock and sucking it a bit.
Sakura pulls a lever and unfolds the couch, lying her body in a vertical position with her ass up. You spank your wife's beautiful butt as she keeps playing the game, spreading her cheeks and massaging them as you tongue her pink asshole and spit on it.
"Ohhh baby, you can't distract me," Sakura says as you focus on eating her ass. She moans loudly as you tongue her fuckholes. "That's why I lost that bet on purpose," she tells you as she shakes her ass in your face. "I could tell," you answer her.
"You love this ass, don't you, honey?" Sakura says as she bounces it in your face, shaking it up and down and left and right. "Get in there with your tongue," she says, putting her ass up. "Honey, I'm so fucking horny," she says.
You tease Sakura, rubbing your shaft between her cheeks, much to her enjoyment. "Oh yes, rub that cock in my cheeks," Sakura says. Soon, you poke your cock in both her entrances, taking it back in her pussy. "Oh yeah, oh fuck," Sakura moans as you bang her in the prone position, her asshole winking for you. "OH SHIT, IT FEELS SO GOOD IN MY PUSSY," she moans as you thrust into it, her moving her ass to meet it.
"Fuck that pussy, hubby, AHHHHH," Sakura begs as you start clapping her cheeks. You kiss her as she smiles. "Your dick is so good inside me," she says as you tease her, playing with it by putting it in and out of her pussy before mounting on top of her.
Sakura puts herself in a fetal position on the couch, spreading her legs for you to enter her pussy in missionary position. "Oh my Gosh, baby, your cock is so big in my pussy," Sakura moans as you fuck her. She closes her eyes and lets you give her the pounding.
"Oh, hubby. I can feel your cock ready to cum at any moment," she says. "Please, baby, cum in my face," Sakura begs. "You want my cum, you fucking gamer whore? Then beg for it harder," you tell her. "Please, please, hubby, paint those glasses white," Sakura says, driving you crazy as you quickly pull your cock out of her and unleash a giant load in her face, her kissing your cock.
"We'll be back for act two soon, guys," Sakura says to the audience as she heads towards the bathroom, taking a selca and sending it for the chat before cleaning her glasses. After a while, you follow her, taking her from behind and putting a finger up her anus. "AHHHHH," Sakura suddenly screams. "My wife is so slutty; she really made me have sex in front of an online crowd on her birthday," you tell her.
"And by the looks of it, you are ready to fuck my ass in front of that crowd, hubby," Sakura says as you massage her butthole. "OH MY GOD, FUCK," she screams as your fingers run all over her asshole. "Oh yes, hubby, right there, prepare that asshole for your big cock," she says.
Sakura returns to the living room, and you are playing video games like nothing happened. "You want to fuck my ass now, hubby?" she asks. "Of course, you fucking bitch, you promised me," you answer her. "You're gonna get it, but only after I tell you," she says.
"First, you're gonna let me play some games with that joystick, Sakura said. "Sit on the floor for me," she ordered as you obliged. Sakura then started massaging your cock with her pair of pink socks, moving her feet up and down your long shaft while she played her game. "I'm working two joysticks at the same time, boys," she told her livestream audience.
"You like that, hubby?" Sakura asked as she continued to perform the footjob, quickly getting your cock back hard. "Yes, I love that," you answered. Sakura made things spicier, pushing her top up once again and showing her tits out to the audience before taking her panties completely off, getting herself fully naked for the first time.
As you pull Sakura's panties down, you bend her over in one of the couch's arms. "I know you're eager for it, hubby, taking that cake on your wife's birthday," Sakura says. Both of you get completely naked. You give her asshole a little licking and spitting before shoving your cock in it. "AHHHH, HOLY SHIT," she moans. "You asked for that big dick in your ass; don't back down now," you tell Sakura, tying her arms behind her back.
"OH MY GOD, FUCK," Sakura screams as you drill her asshole. "You like that, bitch? Getting fucked in the ass while broadcasting it live to your gamer followers?" you ask her. "YES, YES, YES, YES," she moans, grinding her teeth as you attack her ass hard.
"AHHHHHH," Sakura screams as you spank her butt. "Oh my God, you're so fucking deep in my ass, stretching me so fucking good," Sakura moans. "Deeper, deeper," she keeps begging. "FUCK, FUCK, FUCK, YES," she then starts screaming once you hit it hard.
"Such a good whore," you tell Sakura as you spank her ass one more time. She laughs as you finger her wet cunt while pounding her asshole. She looks at you with naughty eyes, getting close to you to give you kisses. "GIVE ME THAT FUCKING DICK, FUCK YES, OH MY FUCKING GOD," she moans as you drill her asshole harder than ever.
"RIGHT THERE, BABY," Sakura tells you. "Cum for me," you command as Sakura's butthole clenches around your cock, signaling her anal orgasm is close. "AHHHHH," Sakura squirts all over the couch as you make her cum. "Fuck, that was so good," she says.
"FUCK, FUCK, FUCK, FUCK," Sakura moans loudly as you get deep in her ass; more spankings follow. At this point, she's forgotten about those videogames, barely able to reach to grab the controller. "OH MY GOD, HOLY SHIT, YOU'RE SO FUCKING DEEP," she screams as the anal pounding keeps going.
You put Sakura in a spooning position on the couch, ready for another round of anal drilling. "Right there, nice and slow," your wife whispers as you wrap your arms around her, teasing her asshole by going in and out of it. You lift her leg, taking it very slow as you massage her pussy. "Yeah," Sakura moans.
"OH MY GOD YOUR COCK IS AMAZING," Sakura screams as you pick up the pace. You admire the gape in her asshole as you put a pair of fingers in her cunt, Sakura reacting with out-of-breath moans as you resume drilling her butt. Your balls clap hard against her ass. "OH FUCK BABY, THAT FEELS GOOD," she moans, kissing you.
"My ass is all yours, hubby; stretch it out, YEAH, YEAH, YEAH," Sakura says as she gets in a fetal position sideways. "I love that so much," she says. "Let me taste my ass," Sakura begs, you pausing the fucking a bit to let her bob her head on your cock again, taking advantage of it and thrusting upwards, which only makes Sakura go crazier and dive for your balls.
"Put it back, baby," Sakura says as she goes back to the spooning position. "OH MY GOD, OH MY GOD, DON'T STOP," Sakura says as she enjoys the hard pounding you give her on the couch. "What do you like more, those stupid video games or my cock deep in your ass?" you ask her. "Your cock in my fucking ass, always, hubby," she answers.
"Oh, it feels so deep," Sakura says as she goes back into a bouncing position, massaging her pussy as she sits on your cock. "Oh baby, I love this so much; your cock feels so good in my asshole," she says. "Right there, baby, right in that fucking hole," she continues to beg.
"Oh baby, what are you doing?" Sakura asks as you wrap your hands between her legs. Quickly she realizes what it is as you lift her legs up in the air, ready to pound her ass in a very submissive full nelson. "FUCK BABY, AHHHHHH," Sakura moans as you hammer her ass like crazy. "OH MY GOD, OH MY GOD, OH BABY," she screams as her ass gets drilled at a very hard speed.
"Yes, baby, stretch me open like that, fuck yeah," Sakura smiles as she gets pounded into submission, fingering her cunt despite being wrapped in a full nelson. "Oh, it feels so deep; I love when you fuck me that way," she tells you as you free her, letting Sakura taste her ass from your cock once more while fucking her face as she tries to deepthroat you.
"Get them," Sakura says as you grab the video game controller back, she watching you get great scores while she jerks your cock off. "Looks like you got some great motivation," she says as she keeps sucking your cock. "Oh my God," you groan, Sakura grabbing the controller and playing the game while she savors your cock.
You put Sakura back in a fetal position on the couch, this time standing up as you get ready to fuck her more. You give a couple of thrusts in her pussy to tease her. "Oh, it's so good," she says before switching to her asshole. She carves her fingers deep in her cunt as you fuck her. "Just like that, baby, pound that ass," she begs as you now play with her cunt, fisting your whole hand inside it while you destroy your wife's ass.
You place your thumb in Sakura's mouth for her to taste her pussy while also playing with her tits as the anal pounding continues. She closes her eyes and spreads her butthole with her hands, showing you the ever-growing gape you deliver to it. "Keep it open for my cock," you tell her.
"I can spend all day getting that ass fucked in front of my fans," Sakura says. "Like the slut you are," you tell her, choking her neck as you fuck her ass faster. "OH MY GOD," Sakura screams, the gape in her asshole growing larger and larger. "Keep fucking my ass like that, hubby, please," Sakura begs as you play with her whole body.
"Give it to me, baby; don't stop fucking that ass," Sakura begs, grabbing the controller and scoring another big kill just as you destroy her ass. "OH SHIT," she screams. "You want fucking more, you gaming whore?" you ask Sakura. "Of course I do," she says.
You put Sakura in a mating press position, pounding her as you firmly stomp your left foot in the couch. "Oh, that's hot," Sakura says. "Damn, they are doing some hentai shit," someone comments as the camera captures the perfect angle of your cock penetrating Sakura's butthole at a straight angle, hard and deep.
"OH YEAH, OH YEAH, DESTROY MY ASS," she begs, you two sharing kisses while her asshole gets obliterated. You attack it harder than ever, Sakura losing her breath as your cock hits the depths of her asshole while you kiss her. "I find it so hot when you fuck my ass like that," she says as you groan with her tight butthole squeezing your cock out.
"Show your fans how large your gaping asshole is," you tell Sakura, putting her pink anus in close sight of the stream camera and playing by putting your cock in and out of it. "OH YES, BABY, FUCK, THAT'S SO HOT," Sakura moans. "She should do this more often," someone comments.
You put Sakura on the top of the couch, pushing the camera in your direction. "Oh yeah, keep fucking me, hubby," Sakura begs as your cock takes multiple deep stabbings in her asshole. Her body jiggles as Sakura tries to keep her balance while spreading her legs wide open. "Yes, pound my fucking ass, baby. FUCKKKK, OH SHIT, OH SHIT, OH SHIT," Sakura screams as you quickly change the pace.
You make Sakura deepthroat your cock, making it wetter for another session. "Yes, put it back, right in my ass, fuck," Sakura begs and gets it, you alternating between hard and deep thrusts. "You're so good, hubby, fucking your wife right in the ass on her birthday, yesss," Sakura says.
"Oh yes, baby, touch my pussy just like that," Sakura begs as you penetrate her ass and pussy at the same time, your cock and your fingers in perfect sync. "Damn, that's so hot," someone comments as the livestream audience keeps growing the harder you fuck your hot, needy gamer wife. "OHHH FUCK, DON'T FUCKING STOP," Sakura begs, both your cock and fingers deeper and deeper in her holes.
"I'M GONNA CUM AHHHH," Sakura screams as she unleashes a massive gush of squirt into the camera. "Damn, she's getting it all wet," a comment says. "Squirt for me, baby, show how much of a whore you are for this cock, entertain your audience," you tell Sakura, making her squirt a few more times. "Damn, she's got a whole geyser in her pussy," someone says.
"Let's get to the floor," you command to Sakura, who quickly gets upside down with her legs over her head, spreading her butthole for you to enter again. Quickly you penetrate Sakura in a pile driver position, Sakura with her head on the floor as you keep stretching out her asshole. "OH MY GOD, OH MY GOD, OH MY GOD, RIGHT THERE, RIGHT THERE," she begs as she fingers her cunt for the audience.
"Fucking take that ass, baby," Sakura says to you as she zooms the camera into the action, capturing your cock going in and out of her butt perfectly. "Look how thirsty her pussy is," someone comments as you put your finger back in her clit and she suddenly starts to squirt. "FUCK, IT FEELS SO GOOD," she moans to the camera, her legs spread wide open almost as if she were like her groupmate Kazuha as you fucked her balls deep.
"Keep fucking that ass until you fucking cum," Sakura begs as your cock bulges under her belly, her tits bouncing as your thrusts get harder and harder. You stretch your body all over the couch, now occupying the entire camera frame as
Sakura gets pounded hard, her head smashing to the floor with your thrusts.
You take a little break and bring a real-sized dildo toy, shoving it into Sakura's ass and showcasing her massive gape to the camera. "Yes, hubby, show them my pink butthole," Sakura begs as you zoom deep into her anal cavity. After a couple of thrusts with the dildo, you feed it in her mouth for Sakura to taste her ass while you fuck it, muffling her moans in the toy while the real thing destroys her pink anus.
"I want to taste my ass from your cock too," Sakura says, and you promptly oblige, shoving your cock in her mouth while she plugs the dildo back in her butt. "It's going really deep; it looks like I stretched it out quite well already," you say to her as you fuck her face before getting back up and thrusting the dildo in her ass.
"Which one do you prefer, my cock or the dildo?" you ask Sakura. "I like any of them, as long as they are fucking my ass," she answers you. "Then let me do it more," you tell her, replacing the dildo with your cock while Sakura spreads her ass.
"OH YEAH, JUST LIKE THAT, RUB MY PUSSY, HUBBY, AHHHH," Sakura moans as she puts her legs completely over her head. "I didn't know you were flexible like that," you tell her. "Let's say my friend Zuha taught me a thing or two about that," she answers.
"GIVE IT TO ME, FUCK ME BABY," Sakura begs as she's completely pinned to the floor. You turn around, smashing her as viewers get to see your ass while you fuck Sakura's, her legs now over her head as she moans like the good Japanese whore she is. "You like your hubby's big cock deep in your fucking slutty ass?" you ask her. "Hell yeah," she answers.
"HMMMM, AHHHH, OH FUCK," Sakura moans as she fingers her cunt, giving the viewers another wonderful squirt show. "Look at her pussy exploding," someone says as she keeps squirting. "YES, HUBBY, POUND MY FUCKING ASS, AHHHH FUCK," she screams as another gush of juices hits the camera, you toying with her asshole, going in and out of it.
Sakura puts a pair of fingers in her asshole and stretches it out. "Keep it open," you tell her. "Yes, hubby, take it; you won the bet; you can fuck that ass all day if you like," she begs as the gape in her asshole only grows larger and larger.
"I sure aren't done with it," you tell Sakura, grabbing a pillow and lying on the floor. "Sit on that dick and show your audience how much of a whore you are for it," you command to her as Sakura quickly impales her already stretched-out ass on your cock.
Sakura moves up and down, showing her beautiful oshiri to the audience as she bounces on your cock. You give her no rest, pumping it from down low. "OH YES, FUCK ME LIKE THAT," Sakura begs as you thrust like crazy, giving her no second to breathe, grabbing and spreading her ass.
"JUST FUCKING USE MY ASS, HUBBY, OH MY FUCKING GOD, PLEASE GIVE IT TO ME, PLEASE MAKE ME CUM," Sakura begs as you drill her ass like a madman. "Damn, he's really wrecking her," someone comments. "SHIT," Sakura screams as you spank her butt. Tying her arms behind her back, she tries to react and bounce on your cock, but you keep relentlessly attacking her ass, grabbing her body in your direction and using her like a fucktoy.
"Come on, you fucking slut, you said you wanted this," you tell Sakura, giving her another hard spanking. "He's turning her cheeks really red," someone says. Sakura obliges, bouncing as hard as she can on your cock, using your thighs as a support as she rides. "OH FUCK, GOSH," she then screams as you keep pumping, reaching to grope her tits while doing so.
You and Sakura keep dueling with each other, but you ultimately come out on top despite being on the bottom. "HOLY SHIT," she moans again as your hands are all over her tits and your big cock is all over her butthole. "I'm so blessed to have a slutty wife like you, Kkura," you tell her as Sakura just turns into your free-use anal toy, your cock hitting her ass deeper than ever.
"YES, FUCKING SPANK ME, HUBBY, AHHHH," Sakura begs as you print the palm of her hands all over her butt. "FUCK, FUCK, FUCK," Sakura screams, your thrusts trying to make her lose her balance. "Damn, he's fucking the shit out of her," someone comments.
"Smile for the camera," you tell Sakura, turning her body around and showing it to her fans as you fuck her ass. She grinds her teeth as her perky nipples bounce. "SHIT," she curses again, your thrusts being so hard she's almost levitating, her fingering her pussy. "OH MY GOD, FUCK, FUCK, YES, YES, YES," she screams as her cheeks get clapped.
"Just fucking use my ass," Sakura begs, putting both fingers in her cunt, ready to squirt again as you pound her butt into oblivion. You reach from behind and start finger-fucking her cunt. "PLEASE GIVE IT TO ME, PLEASE MAKE ME CUM, AHHHH," Sakura begs, you spanking her perky tits as she starts to close her legs, rolling her eyes and shooting another geyser of squirt into the camera.
"AHHHH I'M CUMMING," Sakura announces as her pussy turns into a juicy fountain one more time. You grab her neck as she squirts, Sakura bouncing on your cock as she keeps emptying all the juices on her pussy, grinding hard and showing how much of a whore she is.
Sakura sits back in the couch as you cuddle her with kisses, never keeping your hands out of her throbbing, squirting pussy, jerking your cock off in anticipation for one more round. "Keep stretching that ass; don't fucking stop, yes, yes," she begs for you as you thrust into her on the couch, groping her tits. "PLEASE, PLEASE, DON'T STOP, FUCK," Sakura continues to beg, you clapping her clit while you clap her cheeks.
"Keep going, nice and deep," Sakura says as you grab the camera to show her reactions while you fuck her ass. "Look at her tits bouncing; she is begging for that cock," you tell the audience. "Just keep using me, yes," Sakura says, losing her breath after near an hour of fucking on camera, you hitting her face and choking her neck. "I'm gonna give this fucking slut the proper treatment she deserves for you to watch," you tell me as the livestream keeps getting record numbers.
"YES, YES, FUCK, FUCK, POUND MY FUCKING ASSHOLE!" Sakura turns into a screaming mess. You pause a bit to massage her cunt. "Squirt for them," you tell her. "AHHHHH," Sakura screams as you make her cum, going back into her pussy as you choke her.
"Use that asshole, make it all yours, hubby; just use it to make yourself cum," Sakura begs as she fingers her pussy. "I'm your fucking slut, hubby," she says. "Are you?" you ask her as you spank Sakura's face. "Yes, baby, give it to me; use my hot body for your pleasure," she continues as she smiles at you.
"Tell me, Kkura, where do you want my cum?" you ask her. "Deep in my fucking ass, please, please, fill me up, cum for me," she tells you as you continue to pound. It's been over an hour, and you're ready to bust inside your wife's loose butthole at any second.
"Oh fuck," you groan as your seeds start flowing out of your cock and painting Sakura's pink anal walls white; she smiles as she spreads her ass, letting your cum ooze out into the floor, spreading a good gape for her fans. "This is my birthday gift for my fans," she says.
"Sakura farts out your cum and licks it from the floor. "Let me taste your cum," she says, taking every single drop and making bubbles with it. "So yummy," she says as she swallows and then turns the camera off. "That's a good girl," you tell her just as the stream comes to an end.
"Fuck, that was so good; I had a lot of fun with this joystick," Sakura says. You spank her ass. "Fucking slut, you planned all of this shit," you tell her. "Of course I did; I love my hubby," she tells you. "We should do this again next year," you finish.
"For sure, and next time I'll bring some special guests to play video games with you," Sakura says.
"I can't wait."
Happy Sakura day to everybody. For it, I decided to do a sequel to what I consider to be my breakthrough fic, adding elements of another big fic of mine (Yuna's "Livestream") into the story, as Sakura gets to have an amazing hour of sex on camera with her ass-obsessed husband.
#sakura smut#le sserafim smut#izone smut#female idol smut#girl group smut#kpop smut#male reader smut
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goodnight n go
★ | member — fwb!vernon x f reader ★ | genre — smut, angst, non-idol au, happy ending, fwb to lovers ★ | word count — 10.2k
★ | synopsis — you keep coming back for more, but every night ends the same. maybe this time things will be different.
★ | warnings — guitarist!vernon, rock band!hhu, mentions of alcohol, vernon has commitment issues (but he gets over it) ★ | smut warnings — descriptions of female anatomy, consensual drunk sex, car sex, oral (reader receiving), fingering, piv, making out, multiple orgasms, pussy drunk vernon (he's down baddd), some aftercare ★ | notes — thanks to @onlymingyus for always being the best and to @wonustars for proofreading !! i did not intend for this fic to be this long but i'm actually really proud of how it turned out so i hope you like it!! also i often make playlists for my fics but i never share them, but i've been listening to this one for months while i've been writing this fic so i'll link it so you can listen too. if you enjoy this fic, please reblog and let me know in the tags!! reblogs are super important to tumblr and they help motivate me to keep writing more like this :)
check out the playlist! featuring — goodnight n go - ariana grande ; black eye - vernon ; uh oh - tate mcrae ; sunset - caroline polachek ; romanticise this - james marriott ; entertainer - zayn ; & more
“hey, you wanna get drinks tonight?”
as usual, that’s how it starts.
you probably should have said no. you’d played this game before. you knew exactly what hansol meant when he offered to hang out after band practice, because it was never just “hanging out”.
you don’t even know why you still go to practices anymore. for a long time you’d avoided them; it wasn’t really your style, and you were never interested in being a groupie for their local gigs. your roommate seungcheol always invited you to every practice and every time you declined with the excuse of homework or other plans, but cheol finally convinced you to come just one time.
at first, it had been because he wanted you to hear a new song they were working on and he’d wanted to know how you liked it before they played it at an upcoming show. but then he’d introduced you to the rest of his bandmates, and after that there was no going back.
you couldn’t help the way your eyes always gravitated towards hansol, who insisted that you call him his real name instead of his stage name that everyone else called him. from the very first practice, you were captivated by him: the way his long fingers seem to dance along the neck of his guitar so effortlessly, the way his voice rasps when he sings, the way your breath catches in your throat when he grips the microphone stand and rolls his head back, lips parted in ecstasy.
he’s addictive, and it’s exactly the reason why you find yourself in the backseat of his car over and over again.
every time, it was easy to pretend that things would be different. you’d walk into the bar together and sit at the table in the back, order a few drinks, chat for a while about nothing. did you like the new stuff we played tonight? yeah, i know cheol is really excited to perform it saturday. you been doing any writing lately? mmm, a little. i’ve been feeling inspired. we could go back to my place and i could show you. except he never does.
hansol wasn’t a bad guy. he always paid for your drinks no matter how many times you offered to pick up the tab, he was polite, he listened to what you had to say. he just didn’t want more than that, and that’s where it all fell apart. you’d screw around for a while, then you’d part ways and wouldn’t speak to each other until next week. you never went to see them play shows, he never texted, you never called, never went on a real date besides meeting in the same bar down the street every thursday night after practice.
he seemed fine with that. you weren’t. and yet every time, you ended up back in his arms.
he groans into your mouth, pushing his hips into you and pinning you harder against the faded leather seats of his old honda. his lips are sloppy but eager, messily pressing his mouth into yours as his fingers tangle in the hair at the base of your neck. you can taste the beer and smoke on his breath, but for some reason it doesn’t bother you. maybe you’re used to it, or maybe it’s just because it’s him. you don’t want to know which reason is the truth.
he kisses you until you’re dizzy, and you can’t tell if it’s from the alcohol or from the thrill of kissing him once again. it’s a high you’re convinced you’ll never get tired of, although you’re not quite sure yet if it’s one that he will.
hansol always lets you set the pace, but tonight he can’t seem to keep his hands to himself. both of your shirts met the floor of his car what seems like hours ago, leaving you in just your bra and pants as he makes out with you as if it’s the first and last time he’ll get that chance. his fingers breeze over your waist the same way they breeze over his guitar strings when he plays: careful yet greedy, each touch intentional yet impulsive as he grips your waist.
he drags his fingers higher and it sends a shiver down your spine, arching your hips up against him and rolling your head back against the seat’s headrest. if there’s only one upside to this relationship, it’s that he’s good at this. really good. if he weren’t, then you wouldn’t have spent so many nights letting him fuck you in the parking lot of your shitty local bar. it does something for your confidence knowing that he must feel the same about you, or else he wouldn’t keep inviting you out. at the very least, this arrangement is mutual, even if you wish it wasn’t.
his hips rock against your crotch again, and even through both of your clothes you can feel how hard he is. your mind is clouded, everything’s a haze, and all you can think about is how badly you want him. the warmth of his skin, the gentle scratch of his nails on the back of your neck, his long eyelashes that flutter against your cheek as he kisses you.
you feel your hands slide haphazardly down his bare chest, fumbling over his hips as you tug on the waistband of his jeans. none of it feels graceful, not like the way he handles his music. it’s sloppy, desperate, clumsy, and it’s everything you need right now.
he manages to lean back from you enough to undo his pants and push them down to his knees, but his mouth is back on yours in an instant. somehow you end up on your back across the seats, gazing up at him with slack lips as his thin silver chain dangles over your face. you might not remember a lot of what happens on these nights when you’re with him, but you’ll always remember this moment. him hovering above you with heavily lidded eyes, biting his lip and cursing as he pushes into you, is etched into your mind in a way you simultaneously love and hate. love because it feels so good, hate because it never lasts.
the last half of those nights never stands out in your memory. you remember feeling good, you remember trembling in his arms and gasping and moaning and crying in pleasure, but the images are too fuzzy to make out. you don’t really need to reflect on them anyway; you know he’ll just bring you out next week and do it all over again.
hansol kisses you once more after you’re both finally spent, but the kisses afterwards are always different. more… hesitant, more uncertain. none of the passion and desperation that you’ve come to crave from him. not what you really want.
“i can drive you home,” he offers once he’s finished cleaning you up. for once you think he might genuinely mean it, but you can never be sure enough to take that chance. you want him to drive you home. god, you want him to so bad. to have him come over with you and stay the night, stay another night and another until your apartment isn’t just yours anymore, that’s what you’ve wanted all this time. and it’s what you’ll never have.
“i’ll call an uber,” you answer.
“i’ll wait with you, then.”
the silence that settles over his car is heavy as you climb back into the front passenger seat. you want to tell him to get in the uber with you, stay more than just a couple hours with you in the furthest back corner of the bar parking lot that’s too far to be illuminated by streetlights. you want to argue that he’s too drunk even to drive himself, that he needs to come home with you and sleep it off together in the comfort of your bed, but you know it’s not true and it won’t work. this is a conversation you’ve had many times before. every night you’ve spent with him blurs into the next, always the same.
sometimes you want to laugh at how naive you are, for thinking he’d eventually come to his senses and realize there’s more to you than a good lay before a gig. sometimes you want to grab him and shake him by the shoulders and tell him to grow the fuck up, give him an ultimatum and make him tell you what he wants from you or else put an end to it all. sometimes you just want to cry, to mourn your wasted time when you’re fully aware it’s never going to lead to something more, no matter how badly you want it and how hard you try.
no matter how many times you get your hopes up, no matter how many times you pray and beg and plead with god and the universe and every other higher power to get him to realize this can’t keep going on the way it is forever, nothing ever changes. you’re never going to stop running to him when he calls, and he’s never going to stop calling.
finally another car pulls into the lot, and you manage to pull yourself out of his car. you hear your name behind you and you stumble, swaying on your feet as he rolls down his window.
maybe this time will be different.
he says his usual goodbyes and goodnights, flashing you a loose grin and a wave as his engine sputters to life, and he asks if you’re planning on coming to practice next week.
and you find yourself nodding.
you’re left standing there, your head and your heart pounding, watching his headlights fade as he drives away, until you’ve stood there for so long that your ride starts honking and calling for you to get in the car so you can leave.
maybe next time will be different.
this is going to be the last time, you swear.
you exhale as you stand inside the lobby of the venue, repeating the words to yourself. there’s a chill in the air tonight. the wind blows smoke in your direction from the couple standing by the door, abandoned cigarettes clutched between their fingers as they make out sloppily.
you grimace and turn away, studying the faded graffiti and half-ripped posters and advertisements that litter the walls around you. you mean it this time, seriously. the only reason you came tonight was because it’s the last time. a goodbye, of sorts.
you have to admit, you were a little shocked when hansol texted you after your weekly meet-up after practice. not only did he want to make sure you got home safe after you left, but he’d asked if you’d come to their next performance.
you stare down at your phone in your hand, rereading the texts for what feels like the thousandth time in the past few days just to make sure you haven’t imagined them. but no, there they are, bright pixels staring right back up at you from the screen.
hansol: hey just wanted to make sure you made it back home
hansol: btw we’re playing at the phoenix on saturday and i was wondering if you had plans? i wanna see you
hansol: maybe we could get dinner after or somethin if youre down idk
hansol: hoping youll be there
you’d been tempted to refuse him, out of bitterness or resentment or something else, but you can’t say you weren’t shocked by his offer. he’d suggested every once in a while that you should come see them play sometime, but it was always clear to both of you that it was out of small talk rather than genuine interest in you being there. but this time he’d said he wanted you there.
it was nice to feel wanted, for once. maybe you hadn’t been going crazy. maybe things really were different this time.
you glance at your phone once more to check the time before you slip it into your pocket, taking a deep breath as you walk through the second set of doors into the main room. you can hear the deep sound of wonwoo’s drums warming up, but the stage is obscured behind a ratty set of faded red curtains.
there’s still a few minutes before their set, but the room is already crowded with people so you push your way to the side wall near the back. you don’t really want anyone to see you here, anyway. you don’t want anyone to see that your resolve is paper-thin when it comes to hansol.
you hadn’t told him that you were coming tonight, just sending him a vague response and telling him you’d have to see if your schedule is free. even that felt too generous, after the anguish he’s put you through the past few weeks. he doesn’t need to know that you’re here, just like he doesn’t need to know the real reason you’ve been avoiding ever coming to see him play. and it’s not because you always have other plans.
you’re hoping to just watch the performance quietly from the back, then sneak out without ever having to talk to him, and text him later that you’d enjoyed it. you already knew you were going to enjoy it. you’d heard every original song, cover, and riff they’d ever played together, and at this point you could probably recite their setlist by heart. anyone could see that they were talented together, so it isn’t surprising that the venue is packed tonight. honestly, it’d be for the better if you got lost in the crowd and never saw him face to face.
the house lights suddenly fade into darkness and the crowd starts to quiet, the curtains finally pulling back to reveal the band. seungcheol stands in front of a microphone in the center of the stage, with wonwoo in the back at his drum set and mingyu to his left holding a bass guitar. and then, of course, there’s hansol.
you hate the way your gaze immediately lands on him, standing in the same position he always does, with his guitar slung around his neck by a thick red strap. the crowd starts cheering, and distantly you recognize seungcheol’s voice introducing the group, but you can’t make out any of his words.
your mind flashes back to all the nights you’ve spent sitting on a folding chair in mingyu’s garage, watching them laugh and bicker and fool around. it’s different seeing them actually on a stage for once, the metal of their instruments glinting under the harsh, colorful stage lights.
it’s not a large stage by any means, just a few feet higher than the ground and barely wide enough for all four of them to fit. but their presence is captivating, and it makes the dingy local theater seem more special than it really is. but then again, hansol makes everything seem more special than it really is.
seungcheol finishes speaking and the crowd around you lets out whoops and cheers, but you stay silent. your eyes are still stuck on hansol, watching him scan the crowd as he twists the tuning pegs on his guitar.
even from the back of the room, you can tell he’s nervous. his fingers shake just a little, in a way you know they never do because you’ve watched him tune his guitar a thousand times under the dim interior lights in his car. you watch his eyes dart around the room, squinting to see into the crowd before turning his attention back to the fretboard in his hands.
he’s not the most outgoing guy in the world, but at the same time you know he’s not the kind of person to get stage fright. something is different this time. or, maybe it’s not. you’ve never actually seen him play in front of an audience. you don’t know him as well as you think you do, you have to constantly remind yourself every time your mind starts to wander and you let yourself daydream. after all, he doesn’t know anything about you, and he doesn’t seem to care enough to learn. neither should you.
the band opens with a song you’ve heard a thousand times, then another and another, pausing after every few songs to talk to the crowd. time seems to fly by around you, but everything moves in slow motion when you're looking at hansol. you study the way his hair falls in soft brown waves around his face, his head bobbing to the rhythm as he strums his guitar. it's one thing you've always enjoyed about watching him play; he always gets so lost in the music, and it's fascinating to watch. it's clearly on the list of things he's passionate about, and even if you aren't one of those things, at least you get to see him doing something he loves.
you shake your head, trying to clear your thoughts. you can't let yourself think like that. you're here to end things, not to reminisce. you shouldn't care if he likes music or not, that's not your problem anymore. he's not your problem anymore.
you zone out for a while, trying hard not to think about him but he's the only thing you can focus on. your eyes wander every once in a while, when you hear cheol's raspy voice in the mic or a particularly cool guitar riff from mingyu, but they always end up back at hansol.
they finish playing what you know is their last song, but the crowd is still bursting with electricity. it’s not long before everyone starts to chant, begging for one more song.
“encore?” seungcheol laughs into the mic, and flashes one of his signature dazzling smiles that sends the group of girls standing in front of you into hysterics. he glances over at hansol and nods. “mmm, yeah. i think we can do one more.”
you fold your arms over your chest. now is probably your best chance to leave. it’s not a very big venue, but from the amount of people here it’s obvious that there’ll be chaos once things are over as people start to file out. though most of them will probably be trying to fight their way to the front instead, giving wonwoo their phone numbers written on stained cocktail napkins and asking mingyu to sign their tits. but just as you’re about to start pushing your way back towards the exit, cheol’s deep voice makes you pause.
“we’re gonna play something real special tonight,” he says, making eye contact with hansol again. “something brand new, that we’ve never performed before. you guys wanna be the first to hear it?”
the room erupts into cheers again, and cheol grins. “yeah, i figured. so, i’m gonna let vernon explain this one. take it away, man.”
you stand still, arms crossed and curiosity piqued. maybe you can wait until after the last song. if this is going to be your last hurrah, then you might as well see it through til the end. just this once, and never again.
hansol clears his throat and looks out into the darkened theater. “this song is about a girl i’m in love with,” he starts. that gets a light laugh out of the crowd, a couple whistles and cheers, and he chuckles into the microphone before continuing. the words that have been brewing in your head for weeks seem to instantly melt on your tongue as his voice rings in your ears, echoing through your mind. that’s not you. that’s definitely not you.
“i hope she’s here tonight, but i wouldn’t blame her if she wasn’t. because i think i kind of fucked everything up.” he swallows, his eyes darting back and forth as he scans across the crowd, searching for something. searching for you? “so if she’s out there, i’m sorry. and i know this won’t make up for it, but i hope you like it anyway.”
the crowd cheers again, louder than they have all night, but the noise quickly dies down once hansol begins to play. the lights go dim, and the room fills with a soft melody from his guitar. the sound is unfamiliar, a song you haven’t heard before, and you realize he must’ve been working on it outside of the band’s usual practices.
even if he isn’t talking about you, the song is beautiful. his guitar seems to sing every note that plays, and you can practically see the air around him shimmering with energy. the rest of the room seems to fade away, the audience that separates you suddenly disappearing. it’s like you’re the only two people around, sitting beside him as he plays just for you.
he’s done that a few times, played you little snippets on his guitar. you can almost picture it now: it’s always right after he parks outside the bar, before you head inside together. he’ll unzip the case and pull his guitar from the backseat, positioning it on his lap. he comes up with a different reason every time; sometimes he’ll ask if the chords he’s been working on sound good together, sometimes he’ll tell you to listen to see if it needs tuning, sometimes he’ll say he just needs to practice this section a couple more times before giving up for the night and getting shitfaced with you off too many shots.
but you always see right through his flimsy excuses; obviously he’s doing it to show off, to impress you or something. but for the life of you, you’ve never been able to figure out why. why should he care about impressing you, if he doesn’t want to go any further with you?
and suddenly, as you stand in the back of the theater, watching his eyes sparkle under the lights and his fingers breeze over his guitar, looking more focused and frustrated and angry and sad and sorry than you’ve ever seen him look, now you finally have your answer.
you don’t want him to be talking about you. he shouldn’t be talking about you. you almost wish he would just be an asshole to you, give you a good reason to yell at him and cuss him out and tell him to fuck off, but he never does. sure, he’s a little dense to the not-so-subtle hints you’ve been trying to drop, but he’s always been good to you, even if it’s breaking your heart in the process. maybe you’ve been the dense one all along.
the show ends in a blur, and the lights come back on as people start to file out. there's cheers and more shouts for another encore, but it's clear the night is over. this is the part you've been dreading; even after days of convincing yourself, you're still not sure what you're going to do.
when the crowd finally clears out enough for you to move towards the stage, you can already see the group that’s formed around the members. cheol is off to one side, giving out autographs to whoever waves their napkins closest to him. mingyu’s helping wonwoo pack up his drum kit, smiling shyly at the girls calling his name and promising he’ll come back out to the lobby to meet them once he’s finished.
and then there’s hansol, looking flustered as people crowd around him, a deep blush in his cheeks as he waves his hands to try and get them to leave. you’re just far enough from his line of sight that you almost hesitate. it’s not too late to turn around. it’s not too late to leave before he can see you, to disappear from his life forever, but your heart won’t let you.
you walk a little closer to the stage, hanging back behind the crowd of people, but he sees. his face lights up with relief, and even from a few feet away you can still see his eyes soften. he tells the people to move, more firmly with his words this time, and he hops down off the stage as they part to make room for him. when it’s clear his attention is no longer on them, they grumble and walk away, talking to their friends about the show and how hot all the members are and how they’re definitely planning on coming back the next time they perform.
hansol reaches you in a couple of strides, stopping just in front of you. he stays silent for a second, his eyes roaming over you almost gratefully.
“hi,” he says finally, offering you a lopsided smile. he wipes his palms on his jeans nervously. “you came.”
you bite your lip for a second before you nod. “i did.”
“so you’re— did you— were you here for the end of the show?” he asks, trying to hide the stutter in his words. it’s cute how shy he is all of a sudden. it’s not like him to be shy like this. but then again, the only times you’ve seen him are when he’s playing with the guys or fucking your brains out while he's drunk, so it’s not like you’ve really gotten to know him. maybe he’s always been this shy and you were just too caught up in him to notice.
you know what he’s trying to say without outright saying it. obviously you were there the whole time, a fact you aren’t the proudest of, but you aren’t about to let him know that. “i heard your song,” you finally settle on, cutting straight to the point.
his face goes through about a hundred emotions in the span of a second, from surprised to happy then right back to shy again. “yeah?”
even though most of the room has cleared out by now, he starts walking as he talks, pulling you through the side door into the quieter backstage area. you follow him around the corner until you reach a private room, a wrinkled sheet of paper taped to the door with his name written in sharpie. his guitar case that you've seen so many times lies open on the floor, his backpack slumped against one wall.
“i liked it.”
he exhales in relief as he turns back around to face you, and you can almost see his whole body relax. “i'm so fucking sorry,” he says, nearly stumbling over his words with how fast he tries to get them out. “i've been really, really stupid. the way i left you the other night… i shouldn't have let you go like that. i regretted it the second you left.”
you purse your lips as you listen. you can tell he really means it, and it's getting harder and harder to stay mad at him. but you can't let him off that easy, not after how long you've been going through this.
“i just don't understand what it is you want, hansol. you treat me like— i don't know, like nothing.” you pause and chew on the inside of your cheek for a second, letting your words sink in. “and then out of the blue you beg me to come to your show, and you play this really sweet, heartfelt song, so how the hell am i supposed to take that?”
he winces, but the wounded look on his face doesn't feel as satisfying as you'd hoped it would. “i know. i'm just… i'm bad with words. i'm better at music.” he sighs. “but that's not an excuse. i didn't ever wanna make you feel like that, not on purpose. i just got scared. but i shouldn't have.”
you stand silently, waiting. clearly, there's more on his mind. he stuffs his hands in the back pockets of his jeans, shifting from one foot to the other.
“i love the way you laugh. i love the way you watch me when i'm playing and it makes me feel like the only person in the whole world. i love the way you smile when you're drunk and the way you kiss me. and it was stupid of me to ever think i didn't want that all the time.” he lifts his gaze to meet your eyes, the fear in his expression more obvious than anything you've ever seen before.
you let out a breath, your voice dropping almost to a whisper. “you should've just said that.”
“i should've,” he agrees.
you offer him a tight-lipped smile, trying to keep yourself together. this is not how you thought tonight would go. you didn't even think you'd talk to him, and if you did, you thought it would be a shouting match, screaming and cursing before angrily storming out of the venue, finally feeling vindicated after all this time. yet here you are, standing quietly in front of him and trying not to cry.
he waits for a second, trying to gauge your reaction before he continues. “you're, like, my best friend,” he says, adding a nervous little chuckle to lighten the mood. “i think about you every time i play or whenever i try to write something. it's always about you. you don't know how much i look forward to thursday practices and getting to see you.”
now it's your turn to laugh. “you literally could've just texted me and i probably would've dropped everything to be there, anytime.”
he grins, his smile a little wider this time. “yeah, i know. i tried, the other day when i invited you. that was scary as shit.”
he looks up at you again, his soft brown eyes and long eyelashes shining even under the dim flickering bulb overhead. “i'm really glad you came tonight, though. i wasn't expecting you to, but i really hoped you would.” he offers you another nervous smile. “will you let me try again?”
you don't answer right away, and the look of nervousness starts to seep back into his features. “i promise i—”
but you cut him off, pulling him in by his shoulders and pressing your lips against his. he falters for just a second but his arms immediately wrap around your waist, tilting his head to lean into the kiss, and somehow that one little action feels more natural than anything you've ever done together.
you slide your tongue against his lips, and he lets out a groan into your mouth before he pulls back to breathe. “is that a yes?”
you have to fight the urge to roll your eyes and laugh, but instead you just nod. “yes.”
you definitely didn't come here tonight expecting to get laid. in fact, the last thing you ever thought you'd do is sleep with hansol again. but all of that feels like a distant memory as you head out of the community theater together, his guitar case over his shoulder, walking hand in hand towards his car.
the routine is familiar, but nothing is the same. you're not drunk, you're not in the parking lot of a cheap bar, and you don't feel lonely anymore.
he unlocks the doors and you start to climb into the backseat, but he lets out a little noise and shakes his head, and you look up at him in confusion.
“we're going back to my place. or yours, if you want.” he reaches down to offer his hand and help you out of the car. “i said i was gonna do it right this time, didn't i?”
by the time you get back to your apartment, your stomach is in knots in the very best way. your hands shake as you fumble with your keys, and if you weren’t so on edge it would have almost made you laugh, the way hansol looks away and pretends not to notice. you're more alike than you thought, and suddenly you're overcome with a feeling of excitement. now you get to discover all these little things about him: things you didn't allow yourself to see before, things he wants to show you and tell you and share with you.
you try not to let the awkwardness seep back in, but you pause outside your bedroom door, almost as if you're waiting for hansol to tell you what to do. in just one night he's turned your life on its head, and now you're at a loss.
so he takes it as a sign and kisses you, his hands finding your waist and slowly trailing up your body until he's cupping your chin. it's different from all the other times he's kissed you. it's not just the fiery passion you're used to when you can tell he's worked up, but there's a hint of uncertainty in it, more similar to the kisses he gives you afterwards when you're trying to figure out whether to ask for a ride home or not. and then, the pieces finally settle into place and you realize he wasn't kissing you like that because he didn't want you; he was kissing you like that because he did.
you pull away and he freezes a little, and you can tell from the worried look in his eyes that he thinks he's gone too far. “relax,” you laugh softly, your forearms still resting on his shoulders.
he complies, but his eyes still dart across your face in nervousness. despite how badly he wants you, how badly he needs to prove himself to you, there's clearly still so much that needs to be discussed before you can move forward, things that've been left unsaid for far too long.
you inhale and look up into his eyes, trying to find what emotion is hidden there. “what do you want, hansol?”
“want you to be my girlfriend,” he breathes out without hesitating. if it were any other time and place you might've thought he was joking, but you can tell he's dead serious.
“i—” whatever words you had ready instantly die in your throat, not expecting such a genuine answer. “yes. but i meant, like, right now. what do you want, right now.”
his expression shifts in understanding and he grins, though it's still shy. “oh. well…” he pauses again to think. “what do you want me to do?”
you watch his eyes carefully for a moment before you reply. you've wanted him to do a lot of things. you wanted him to be better, you wanted him to be worse. you wanted him to do anything besides being stuck in this weird limbo of friend-zoned friends with benefits. but now that the choice is up to you… you don't want any of that.
“i want you to be honest,” you start softly, almost shy to say it, but you know it needs to be said. “i want you to tell me how you feel. because i can't lie, you really fucked up. i shouldn't have given you so many chances.” he winces at that, but you brush your thumb along his cheek and pull his attention back to you. “but i did. so you need to earn my trust again. and i just want you to not be so afraid anymore.”
he stays silent for a long moment before he nods, as if he's seriously considering your words. “i know,” he says finally. his voice is quieter now, barely above a whisper. “i'm sorry. you're gonna get so fucking sick of hearing me say how sorry i am, but i'm not gonna stop saying it.”
you want to laugh, but his tone is so serious that you know you shouldn't, so you keep a straight face and ask him again. “so… what do you want?”
he lets out a sigh, still holding you face in his hands. “shit, everything. but, first— i really wanna taste you. can… can i?”
you take a step backwards into the bedroom and he follows, tearing off clothes one by one in a hurry until you're both left with just underwear. with the limited space in his car you've never actually been fully naked together before, and the thought of him seeing you is both terrifying and exhilarating.
he leans you down onto the bed and you pull him down with you. he falls beside you, pausing to kiss you once more before rolling off the bed and onto his knees, holding your legs in front of him as he stares up at you.
it's the kind of image that could drive a woman mad. you didn't think he was capable of being this patient, but it seems he's full of surprises tonight. “yes,” you breathe out and finally give him an answer. your eyes are locked onto his, a silent conversation happening between you in the span of a second.
he clears his throat and slowly pries your legs apart, pulling his gaze away from your face to stare between your thighs instead.
“god, this pussy…” he groans in delight as he settles your legs over his shoulders, his gaze transfixed on the wet spot at the seat of your panties.
he slides his palms up your thighs, and for his sake you pretend not to notice the way his fingers are shaking just a little. you lift your hips to encourage him, and he slips his long fingers beneath the hem of your panties before pulling them down, taking his time to slide them off and toss them on the floor behind him.
his hands immediately come back up to your thighs, using his thumbs to press your legs apart to give him a better view.
“so fucking gorgeous,” he mumbles to no one but himself. it's like he's in a trance, admiring the dripping mess between your legs like it's about to be his last meal. if he hadn't been so enthusiastic, you might've been embarrassed at the electric shiver that runs through you from his praise. but when there's a man this hot in front of you, kneeling and staring up at you like you're the most beautiful thing he's ever seen in his life, it's hard to feel embarrassed for long.
he leans in and presses a soft, open-mouthed kiss to your clit, and you nearly jump out of your skin at the feeling. he's never been incredibly rough with you before, but he’s never been this gentle, either. he's touching you so delicately, like a statue at a museum that he's not sure yet if he's allowed to touch or not.
your reaction spurs him on, and he leans in further to flatten his tongue against your entrance and gives a long, slow lick. your hips lift automatically, trying to push him closer and add more pressure.
he curls his tongue through your folds before pulling away, his hands coming up to rest on your hip bones and hold you down. “even better than i imagined,” he groans, looking up at you from his spot on the floor, and the image of him down there makes you so dizzy that you have to lay back down against the bed again.
“more,” you whimper desperately. in the back of your mind there's a distant feeling of shyness at how demanding you're being, but you don't think twice about it. after everything he put you through, he still needs to prove himself to you, that he's not going to break your heart again. but he's doing a damn good job so far. “vernon— ah, fuck!”
“mm, anything.” he presses a kiss against the soft skin on inside of your thigh. “anything you want, baby.”
you don't even have time to process the nickname before he's diving back in, his lips wrapped around your clit as he sucks at you. you let out a strangled noise of surprise, your hand instantly flying down to hold his head.
your fingers tangle in his hair, his tongue so deep in your pussy that you're already gasping and writhing under his touch. you can't tell which one of you has been more stupid for not letting this happen sooner, because it almost seems like he's enjoying this more than you are.
the coil in your stomach already feels like it's about to burst, pent up with white-hot energy that feels hotter than the sun. it hardly takes a few more pointed laps of his tongue before you fall apart into his mouth, whimpering and groaning and begging shamelessly for him.
“you called me vernon,” he says when you finally manage to push his head away, shivering with overwhelming sensitivity. he lifts one hand to wipe at his chin, way too nonchalant after everything he just did.
you're still fighting through the haze of your orgasm but his words bring you back down to earth, and your face fills with heat. “huh? sorry, i—”
“everybody calls me vernon,” he says as he shakes his head, quickly cutting you off. he stands up and moves onto the bed, flopping down beside you. “i liked that you always called me hansol. made it feel special.”
your eyes follow his movements, still laying on your back as you catch your breath. “but…?”
he grins, and you swear there's a hint of blush in his cheeks. “but that was really sexy when you called me vernon. it sounds way cooler when it's coming from you.”
all you can do is laugh, letting your eyes close as you rest your hands on your stomach. “noted,” you giggle. “so should i do it more, then?”
he hums in thought, rolling over onto his side so that he's closer to you. “you can do whatever you want, baby.”
that nickname again. he's already started leaning in to kiss you again, but you grab his shoulders and pull him down to meet him halfway. there's a bitterness on his tongue that you'd almost forgotten about, but you're quickly reminded once you feel his hand sliding across your stomach and down back between your legs. you let out a surprised but happy moan into his mouth, one of your hands moving to the back of his head to kiss him harder.
your legs part, accepting the warmth of his palm as he gently presses it against your sensitive clit. he holds his hand there for just a moment, pausing his movements as he kisses you, eagerly swallowing the whimpers and sounds you give him in return.
after a minute he shifts his hand, carefully pressing his index and middle finger into you. you're right up at the edge again already, clenching down hard around his fingers as he sets a slow pace, pulling them out halfway before thrusting them in deeper than before. you're seeing stars, releasing a constant stream of muffled moans into his lips as he curls his fingers inside you. he follows the rhythm of your hips as you rut against his palm, letting the movement force his fingers even deeper.
his fingers are dripping with your juices, down his knuckles and pooling in his palm, but it only makes him want to fuck you even more. it's not like this is the first time he's fingered you. the guys at the auto shop down the street know him all too well, from the amount of times he's had to take his car in to get the seats cleaned. he always claims that it's because he's a messy eater, and while that's true in some ways, he knows those guys don't buy it for a fucking second.
his fingers are completely buried inside you but he never stops kissing you, breathing almost as heavily as you are. he stops thrusting his fingers and adjusts his hand once more, pressing his thumb against your clit to rub lazy circles over it.
“ver—vern— fuck, hansol!” you finally manage to pull away from his lips, nearly gasping for air as another orgasm rips through you. his other hand slides down your body and it feels like the first time you've ever been touched, his palm so warm and tender against your skin that it somehow makes your high even better. you're shaking in his arms, lips parted in a soundless moan as you clench wildly around his fingers, but he just holds you tighter against his body and keeps pressing kisses along your jaw.
his lips are wet with both spit and slick as he watches you, his eyes filled with stars. usually when you're together, in the dark backseat of his car illuminated only by the moonlight and nearby streetlamps, it's hard to make out the details. it's dark, and everything is fuzzy from both the alcohol and the late hour. but now, he's realizing how stupid he was for never letting this happen sooner. he could've ended up going his whole life without ever seeing you like this, laying completely fucked out under the soft light in your bedroom, your pupils wide and eyes watery and so, so beautiful.
he waits until you've calmed down again, leaning away to give you a little space, but your hand shoots out to grab his wrist and keep him close to you and he can't help but smile. when you open your eyes you're expecting to find a cocky smirk, to see how proud of himself he is for having you in the palm of his hand so easily, but it's not there. just that soft smile.
“now. what do you want?” he says. “i should be asking you that way more often.”
“want you inside,” you pant out. “now. please? i— i missed you.” you shouldn't have said the last part out loud, but at this point you don't care anymore. all your cards are out on the table.
his eyes widen a little at your boldness, but he bites his lip and nods. he can't lie and say he wasn't secretly hoping you'd say that, but he'd be just as happy to sit here on the floor and eat you out over and over and over again. he'd do anything you want at this point, and not just because he feels like he owes you. he does, but it's deeper than that. it's a different kind of feeling, one that makes him want to do cheesy shit like lay his jacket over puddles for you and buy an airplane to write your name in the sky.
as he starts to position himself between your legs on the bed, you watch his face. his expression is outwardly neutral, but little by little you've started to recognize the signs of his happiness. it looks good on him.
but your brain isn't content with that, not just yet. you swallow as a thought crosses your mind, and you can't push it down any longer.
“wait,” you say quietly, forcing the word out before you can reconsider. he stops immediately, his eyes searching your face for anything he can find, any sign that you've changed your mind about this.
“yeah?” he replies, his voice just as quiet, as if he's afraid to speak too loudly and break the tension of this moment.
you clear your throat as best you can manage, though it's kind of starting to get sore from how much and how loudly you've been moaning all night. “just curious,” you start, nervousness suddenly starting to creep in. but tonight is for being honest, and you can handle the truth. probably.
“before, while we were together— well, it doesn't really count as being ‘together’ but you know what i mean.” you pause again, chewing your lip. “did you ever… y'know. was there ever anybody else?”
hansol exhales, still hovering over you. “no. unless you count lotion and my hand, ‘cause there was a lot of that.” your eyes soften and you visibly relax at his words, and he mentally kicks himself for ever making you even think that was the case. that there would ever be anyone else for him but you. “i know i was stupid, but i'm not that stupid.”
“okay.” you pause again, trying to figure out how to get back on track. “sorry, i just wanted to know. i don't care.”
he scoffs, but his tone is more melancholy than angry. he shifts on top of you so he can rest on his elbows, getting closer and brushing his hand over your hair. “you should care. if i had, i would've given you full permission to lay into me, cuss me out, whatever. i would've deserved it. you don't deserve that.”
“i wanted to, trust me.” you sigh. “but you're too nice to me. i thought…” you chew on your lip, eyes searching his as you try to figure out what to say. “…i don't know what i was thinking.”
“i don't think i'm anywhere near ‘too nice’,” hansol laughs. the sincerity in his expression almost makes you feel better. “i'm the luckiest dude on the planet that you didn't decide to, like, slash the tires on my car and egg my house or something instead. i really wouldn't have blamed you if you did.”
“maybe i should then, next time,” you say, a smile creeping onto your face.
he shakes his head. “there won't be a next time.”
the room goes quiet and you stare at each other for a second, letting his words sink in. you can tell he's being lighthearted, but he's not even trying to hide the sincerity behind his words.
“you can… continue now,” you say after a tense moment, breaking the silence. the tension in the room is thick but it's not uncomfortable, slowly but surely melting into a lust that's deeper than any of the times you've been drunk and horny in his car.
he nods, and he reaches down to brush your hair back behind your ear before his hands slide down your body. he seems so hesitant to let go of you, but finally he lifts one hand to grip his cock and position himself at your entrance. he braces his other hand against your hip, shivering as he brushes the tip of his cock up through your folds. fuck, he's not gonna last.
after steeling his nerves as best he can and trying to convince himself not to bust the second he's inside you, he angles himself between your legs and starts to push in.
by some miracle he manages not to cum immediately, squeezing his eyes shut and trying to think about literally anything else but how fucking beautiful you are lying beneath him, but what actually happens instead might be worse.
hansol groans once he's fully inside, slowly splitting you open bit by bit until he bottoms out with his hips flush against yours. there are so many words on his tongue begging to spill out, but he can't think straight. holy shit, he can't even think about anything right now. why did he never say anything sooner? why did he waste so much time content with putting in the least amount of effort when he could've been having you like this all along?
“i love you,” he blurts out, and for a split second you think maybe this is all a dream and somehow you passed out at the show and hit your head so hard you started hallucinating this. but then his eyes widen and he winces in that way you've started to recognize, and you almost laugh because now you know it's real.
“shit, i don't know why i said that. i'm sorry. fuck, i'm sorry,” he groans and hangs his head, but despite his embarrassment you can still feel every inch of his dick twitching inside you and it feels way too good to ignore. “you don't have to say it back. i know it's way too soon—”
“did you mean it?”
“what?”
“did you mean it?” you repeat. his attention pulls back to you, a confused yet hopeful look in his eyes that makes your heart warm.
he clears his throat, obviously trying to hide the pink spreading across his cheeks. “yeah. i think i did. and not just because you have the best pussy ever.”
“are you sure? because that's what it sounds like to me,” you tease and try to roll your eyes, but his words make you clench involuntarily around him and he curses under his breath.
“fuck— yes, i’m very sure, i meant it and i'll keep saying it forever if you'll let me.” he lets out a groan, both hands now firmly planted on your waist. “but, god, please let me fuck you now. i'm trying so goddamn hard to hold back and i'll gladly go for another round later but i'm trying to make it up to you right now and it's gonna completely ruin it if i cum in, like, five seconds.”
you can't help your laughter in that moment so all you can do is nod, lifting your hips a little to try and get him going. and he takes the hint, pulling halfway out of you before slamming back in, a loud, deep string of groans leaving his lips.
his pace starts out frantic but he quickly calms himself down, stabilizing himself through his grip on your waist and pulling you to meet his thrusts. he snaps his hips into you at a smooth pace, his cock dragging against your walls with each stroke in a way that has you clawing at his wrists for support as he holds onto you.
hansol may be bad at relationships, but he's never been bad at sex. even on a good day it really doesn't take much to have you seeing stars, but this is different. this is desperate, determined, thankful, and hopeful all wrapped into one movement, sliding in and out of you with a passion you've only ever seen when he's playing guitar.
“ha— ngh— hansol!” despite your efforts to keep it steady, your voice still comes out broken, his name escaping your lips as easily as breathing. you roll your head back against the pillow, and you're suddenly even more grateful that you're at home in your bed instead of alone in a parking lot. this is so much better, better than you could've dreamed.
“fuck, you always take my cock so good,” hansol groans as he leans forward and buries his face in your chest. “i should’ve been telling you that every single time, how good you are. so fucking good.”
the way he fucks you is strangely tender, in a way you're not sure you've ever felt before. it's rough, but somehow in a gentle way. he's taking you apart piece by piece and putting you back together with his hands, his kisses, his touch. none of the times before have ever come close to this.
maybe it's the feeling of a mattress beneath your back instead of a hard plastic seat, or maybe it's the promises hanging in the air between you that makes this time feel brand new. maybe you're just too caught up in the moment to think straight, but for the first time it finally feels like a fresh start. this time is different.
“baby, please, one more for me,” he moans into your skin as his hips begin to grow weary, his breath hot against your chest. “‘m not gonna last much longer— fuck, cum for me one more time, baby. god, you're so perfect. please, let me make you cum.”
at this point he's rambling, almost as far gone as you are, but it's like he doesn't even need to ask. as soon as the words leave his mouth you feel the familiar sensation starting to build again, burning hotter and quicker than before. you almost start to panic because you can't even tell if you have another one left in you, but you look up and meet his eyes one last time and suddenly a wave of calm washes over you at the sight of his soft brown eyes filled with way more love than you're expecting to find there.
you don't even have time to tell him when it hits you one more time, you just grab him and hang on tight as your high tears through you. you struggle to lift your legs and wrap them around his back, pulling him in even closer to you as your walls flutter uncontrollably around him. he invades your senses and you can feel him everywhere, and you can only hope he feels the way you do.
but it's obvious that he does, because “ah, shit—” is the last thing you hear before he pulls out, barely managing to get back in time before he spills all over your stomach, your thighs, your pussy, the sheets. it's everywhere, and neither of you care. his hands are still on you gripping your waist tightly like he can't bear to let go, his cock pulsing limply as it rests against your stomach. rope after rope of thick white floods over your skin, and yet it's like he barely even notices because he's so busy repeating your name, praising you again and again in between swears and shaky moans.
you're panting, your hands shaking as you reach for him, but he's already right there. he's breathing heavily himself as he drops down on the bed beside you, wrapping his arms around you and burying his head in the crook of your neck.
his weight half leaning against you is grounding, and eventually you feel your heart starting to return to normal as you become aware of the sticky puddle of sweat and cum that you're both laying in. but you just close your eyes and rest, focusing on his body warmth and his palm holding your side and the tickle of air coming from his nose as he breathes against you, and you realize nothing, no feeling in the world, has ever felt better than this.
when he reluctantly pulls himself away from your body to go look for a towel, you already know there's no question about whether or not he's staying over tonight.
once he's done cleaning you off he lifts you up into his arms, laughing and nuzzling his nose into your neck as he sets you down at your desk chair to start stripping the mess of sheets off your bed, and in that moment you can't help but think how lucky you are. he keeps saying that he's the lucky one for letting him have a second chance, but you're lucky in a lot of ways, too. lucky that it turned out he wasn't as much of an idiot as you’d thought. lucky that your heart wouldn't let you give up on him, no matter how hard you tried. lucky that after everything, hope still works sometimes.
after stumbling around your room, tossing blankets and sheets around and looking the happiest you've ever seen him, you're finally settled down together and you're back where you've always belonged, laying in his arms. it's so late that the sun is probably coming up soon and you're exhausted from the emotional rollercoaster of a night, but you couldn't care less about what happens next because everything finally feels right.
hansol sighs, his arm curled a little awkwardly around your shoulders as he twirls a lock of your hair between his fingers. “can… we not do this anymore?” he asks finally.
his voice is quiet; not shy or uncertain, just quiet. it's different than what you're used to with him. usually when you're around him everything is loud, it's fast and messy and jumbled, a whirlwind of a night followed by heartache and a pounding headache in the morning. but now he's just… quiet. all the thoughts that normally rush through your head are gone, leaving nothing but silence.
you swallow, confused. although you've already talked out all your worries, you can't help the uncertain feeling that starts to return. “what do you mean? like, right now?”
he exhales like he's thinking, and his fingers pause in your hair. “like… i don't know. i want things to be good between us. whatever we were doing before— anything but that. no more not talking about stuff. no more tension. y'know? i promise.”
“mmm.” you hum, letting his words sink in for a while. you drum your fingers absently against his chest, almost trying to make sure he's still there. “yeah. i think… i think things are good between us now.” you giggle, leaning your head against his chest. “as long as you don't pull that shit again.”
he laughs, reaching up to grab your hand off his chest and hold it there. “oh, yeah, i know. you're way too good to me for even giving me another chance. i'm so sorry i almost fucked it all up.”
“you don't have to say that anymore.”
“well like i said, babe, i'm going to—”
“you can just keep saying ‘i love you’ instead.” you interrupt, squeezing his hand in yours.
he stops short in the middle of his sentence, caught in surprise, but as soon as your words register a grin slowly begins to make its way across his face. “cool. then… i love you.”
© junkissed 2024. do not repost or translate. ── ⊹ ˙ . 𖥻 want to be notified when i post new fics? join my taglist!
i hope you enjoyed this!! if you did, please reblog or leave a comment or an ask! it shows me this is something people want to see more of, and knowing people like this makes me want to write more of it! i put a lot of time, love, and effort into writing this, so feedback is really appreciated :) thanks for reading!!
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#[📌] — june.writes#svthub#kvanity#kflixnet#k-labels#bjnet#mansaenetwork#caratlibrary#thediamondlifenetwork#vernon smut#hansol smut#svt smut#seventeen smut#vernon imagines#vernon fanfic#vernon scenarios#vernon x reader#vernon angst#vernon fluff#hansol x reader#hansol scenarios#hansol fanfic#svt scenarios#svt imagines#svt fanfic#seventeen scenarios#seventeen imagines#seventeen fanfic#seventeen x reader#svt x reader
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please stop scrolling for a sec!! i'd really appreciate your attention!!
hello, my name is nexys and i am a disabled, autistic, and queer person trying to make it in the content creation world. i'll do my best to keep this short and sweet, but i'm going to be having a subathon over on twitch starting 8/1 (august 1st) at 12pm CST.
this event is super important to me, as i'm trying to raise money to improve my living situation, as well as the living situations of those in my community. i'm also going to be running a charity day on friday, august 2nd for parkinson's awareness, research, and treatment, and will be having on my grandfather, who is an advocate with the disease. and i know it would mean a lot to him if he was able to raise some money to help other people like him.
for those that don't know, a subathon is when a streamer goes live on twitch for a certain amount of time, and the stream ends when the timer runs out. however, the timer can be increased indefinitely by viewers donating money, subscribing, gifting subscriptions, or cheering bits.
due to my disabilities i can't go 24/7 like some of the maniacs (/lh) out there, but i have committed to going every single day for at least four hours until the timer hits zero. and once again, this subathon event holds potential to be lifechanging for a lot of people. plus i'll be collaborating with over a dozen other creators throughout the first week, so you'll be getting a lot of variety! we'll be playing everything from pokémon to phasmophobia, roblox to subnautica, and more!
even if you can't contribute financially, dropping a follow, saying hello, and just Being There would mean the world to everyone involved.
here's my linktree, which directs to every website i'm on, including my twitch channel and discord server.
even if you're not personally interested in this project, please consider reblogging! there's a chance one of your followers might be interested, and any engagement helps. <33 thank you so much for reading this far, and i hope you have a great rest of your day/night!
#queer#lgbt#nonbinary#disabled#plural#plural system#endogenic#pro endogenic#systempunk#pluralpunk#pluralgang#autism#autistic#aromantic#asexual#lgbtqia+#twitch#youtube#content creator#content creation#subathon#enbyhyena#please reblog#important#psa#gaming#games#pokemon#minecraft#roblox
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Synastry observations-

➬Sun in partner’s 8th house —The 8th house person could get lowkey obsessive. Like I'm not willing to share you with anyone.
➬Some people be like negative aspects makes a Synastry chart interesting. Okay mama, NO!
➬Moon-Pluto (esp. hard aspects like conjunction, square, opposition) Straight up obsessive. It's intense, karmic, soul-binding—like you know each other from a past life and unfinished business is on the menu. “I feel you in my bones. You leave? I'll lose my senses."
➬Venus-Pluto (esp. conjunction, square, opposition) so deep that people stay trapped in it even when it hurts. There’s sacrifice here, possession, jealousy, and lots of “If I can’t have you no one can” type of vibes.
➬8th House overlays (esp. personal planets in the other’s 8th) If someone’s Sun, Moon, Venus, or Mars falls into your 8th, you both might feel like you were born to merge—like literally, you lose sense of where they end and you begin. Obsessive.
➬Mars-Pluto aspects, Mars is drive, Pluto is death and rebirth—when they aspect in Synastry, it’s "I’ll fight the whole world for you, and burn it down if I have to." Could go to war for you. Could also burn your house down if you cheat. Can be toxic asf.
➬Composite Pluto in the 1st / 7th / 8th house, The composite chart shows the relationship's energy. If Pluto sits strong here—it’s not casual. Literally “you changed me forever. No going back.”
➬North Node conjunctions (esp. Pluto, Moon, Venus, Mars)This screams fate. The North Node person feels pulled toward the other like a cosmic black hole. It’s intense and often comes with the vibe of "I don’t know why, but I would do anything for you." Even if it's self-destructive.
➬Uranus hard aspects (esp. Uranus square or opposition Venus / Moon / Sun)This is the "hot and cold AF" placement. “I want you so bad right now...but also don’t text me tomorrow” energy.
➬Uranus brings chaos, inconsistency, and detachment. When someone’s Uranus hits your Venus? They’re attracted to the thrill—but that sh*t burns out fast. “You were a moment, not a forever.”
➬Venus square Neptune- Ah yes, the gaslight-gatekeep-ghost combo. Neptune clouds things. Venus is love. This is the classic “I love you” one minute then “I never said that” the next.
Super romantic...until you realize they were selling a fantasy, not the real thing.
➬Mars square or opposite Neptune- Sexual confusion. Manipulative seduction. Ghosting after sex. This person might not even intend to hurt you—they just live in la-la land and can’t commit to anything grounded. You’re left like: “Was that real or did I hallucinate this entire relationship?”
➬5th house synastry overload (with no Saturn) If their planets fall all up in your 5th house, that’s the flirt-and-fun zone. It’s giving passion, creativity, romance—but short-term. Without Saturn (aka glue), this person is here for the plot, not the vows. "You were a muse, not a partner."
➬Lack of Saturn or North Node contacts
No Saturn = no seriousness. No glue. No maturity.
If your Synastry has zero Saturn, especially to personal planets (Sun/Moon/Venus), it often means: “There’s nothing holding this person accountable.”
It might feel good...until it crumbles.
Saturn is “I’ll show up.” No Saturn = “I’m just here for fun, not the consequences.”
➬One-sided - Pluto/Venus/Mars stuff
If your Pluto is all over their Venus and Mars, but they got nothing back for you? That’s a you-loving-them situation. They’re just soaking up your obsession like free validation.
➬Moon-Uranus or Venus-Uranus double whammy
Both of y’all got Uranus wildness hitting each other’s hearts and love planets?
That relationship will be off-and-on more than a damn light switch. Someone will get hurt. Bad. This is the: “I wanna be with you—but also I’m not free right now... or ever” energy.
➬Composite Neptune square Venus/Moon/Sun
In the composite chart, this is THE indicator of lies, illusions, and disappointment.
At first? Magical. Eventually? You're crying on your floor at 3am listening to sad playlists wondering if they ever loved you. Spoiler: They loved the idea of you, not YOU.

➬I think no Saturn aspects = no commitment.
In short, if you see...
Uranus = inconsistency
Neptune = lies/fantasy
No Saturn = no commitment
5th house overload = casual flings
One-sided Pluto = obsession imbalance (Girl they’re not serious about you. You’re a detour not the destination.)
➬Did you ever experienced someone's Pluto in your 1st house? As your rising? Pluto person be like “I’d burn the world down to keep you” They might lowkey stalk you. Not always literally but like... mentally?? Spiritually?? They fixate.
Pluto in 1st house – “You just exist and I lose my damn mind.”
➬Pluto conjunct/opposite Venus – Obsession meets romance. Can't unsee each other. Ever.
➬Neptune conjunct Venus – Delusional in love. “You’re my fantasy.”
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#astro#astro community#astro observations#astro notes#astro placements#natal placements#air signs#synastry#astroblr#astrology
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Hail To The King
► 𝙿𝚊𝚒𝚛𝚒𝚗𝚐 - king!yunho x ex-princess!reader ◄ ► 𝚃𝚊𝚐𝚜/𝙶𝚎𝚗𝚛𝚎 - 18+, historical au, angst, bone-deep hatred, revenge, imprisonment, enemies-to-lovers, she-fell-first-but-he-fell-harder, prisoner of war, slice of life, slow burn, politics, time lapses, path to healing, redemption, cliché ending, smut towards the end (fingering, face-sitting, mentions of daddy, softdom!Yunho, doggy, missionary, creampie, no protection {don’t do this!!!})◄ ► 𝚃𝚛𝚒𝚐𝚐𝚎𝚛 𝚆𝚊𝚛𝚗𝚒𝚗𝚐 - MDNI, stealing kisses, mentions of violence (but definitely NOT described), Y/N gets hurt and it might be triggering to some because !knife was used (ML saves you) ◄ ► 𝚆𝚘𝚛𝚍 𝙲𝚘𝚞𝚗𝚝 - 28K+ (SHEESH) ◄ ► 𝚂𝚢𝚗𝚘𝚙𝚜𝚒𝚜 - You are the ex-princess of a fallen kingdom whose king, your father, ruined everybody's lives and is now taken over by neighbouring kingdom. Their king, Jeong Yunho has taken you captive to get even and he is determined to break you until you are nothing more than a shell of your previous status as a princess.◄ ► 𝙽𝚘𝚝𝚎𝚜 - I'm back after a month! This was longer than I thought but it was needed. More notes towards the end (very important!) Title from Avenged Sevenfold. ► 𝚃𝚊𝚐𝚕𝚒𝚜𝚝 - @ginger-mingi @0rangemilk

I slowly put my head down in defeat and put on a cynical smile. The sky looked good today, a little too good, as if it was mocking me with how it expanded above as an ever-growing dream. Only I don't get to live that dream. Today was the day I will get executed for the sins I not once committed. "Princess," Ilri, my trusted maid, pleaded with a shaky voice.
I shook my head with a small smile and tears fell from her eyes. There was not a single dry eye right now and all I could hear were sniffles as I looked around "You shall not call me that," I tenderly patted her head. "I am no longer your princess, my father is dead."
I looked at each and everyone of my beloved maids, the ones I had grown up with, and the ones I will never, ever see again after this. "You all have served me well. May the Gods bless you and your future."
I tried to not to show emotions in my last moments with them, if I do, all the beacon of hope they have will vanish along with me. I waved goodbye to my good maids for the last time and the prison guards proceeded to put me in shackles and drag me to my execution place. They didn't even bother giving me footwear. I can feel the tears threatening to pool in my eyes, but I blinked them back. I'll be damned if any of these people see me cry. The walk was long, as if they were giving me my last shred of humanity before they stripped it away from me. I stared at the heavy shackles that bound my wrists together and suppressed a groan of pain when the guard pulled on it 'accidentally.'
My father, the former ruler of the Kingdom of Aurora, was not the best ruler. I knew my father was not a good person, and he had this coming for him eventually, but now I have to bear the sins he made and pay for them with my life. I was being led to the execution ground, each step I took felt heavier and heavier, and the screams from the people from Dune were getting louder and louder; more ear-piercing, more bellowing.
I was pushed harshly andI suppressed a groan of pain when I hit the ground and realized that my knees and palms were bleeding. I hear the guards snickering from above me. I stood up and looked them in the eye without backing down. They become uncomfortable and shift away. Bloodlust. I slowly talked in the middle of the area, the roars getting more deafening. The people, they want me dead to satisfy their habit of decomposing, right before their very eyes.
And die I will. I kept my head held high, refusing to look down. I refuse to bow down, even if the ground hurts my delicate feet the more I step forward. It seemed like the whole kingdom was here. After the information that Aurora was down, it wasn't much of a surprise that everybody wanted to witness this spectacle. Everybody knew I would be here, and everybody knew me. They have suffered far too long and my death would make a change. Things have been thrown my way - eggs, shoes, tomatoes, even daggers - none of them hit me, yet. I tried ignoring them and continued to my set course until I stopped below what seemed like a stage.
There were people there, officials with how they wore their uniforms, but the only thing that caught my attention was the one man that sat in the middle of the stage - The King. I couldn't see half of his face, nobody except his confidants. He always had this mask that covered his lower face and it always emphasized how dark his eyes were. I'm not talking about the colour, I meant the level of sinister it held.
And right now, it held pure, unadulterated hatred towards me; the type that reduced me into nothing but a vermin. Silence enveloped the whole place, not a breath nor an exhale could be heard all throughout. An official stepped forward with his hands behind his back. He was of average height, nothing too extraordinary. But he was cunning, like that of a fox.
"Your kingdom has fallen, Princess Y/N," the King's right-hand man, Jung Wooyoung, said. "Best believe, you shall concede."
When he called my name, flashbacks upon flashbacks came into my mind. I remembered the sacrifices I had to make to get to where I was. All the suffering, the hurt, but all in vain. I didn't answer, opting to look him straight in the eye. I wasn't trying to rebel or show dominance, just that I meant absolutely no harm. "Lest you deny everything that is your kingdom," Wooyoung paused. "Your father has done, you are, hereby, sentenced to death..."
I tuned him out, my ears ringing so loudly in my head that I couldn't focus. I knew it was coming, but it didn't hurt any less.
"Kneel."
It was one word, and it had snapped me out of whatever trance I was slowly falling onto. My eyes widened ever so slightly, but I composed myself before anyone could notice. When I didn't move, a tall man wearing full-blown knight armour began to make his way towards me. I stifled a gasp when he drew a sword to my neck. I was sure he nicked the skin because I felt warm liquid trickle down. "Bow down, princess," the knight spat with venom.
The King raised a hand and in one second, the knight left my side. It was unnerving, the control he had on everyone, but not before snapping at me one more time. "If you know what is best for you," another voice from the podium sounded. It was calm, but make no mistake, he was vicious. "Your life no longer belongs to you. Bow."
I couldn't help the fire in my eyes as I stared angrily at the stage and announced in the loudest, firmest voice I could ever muster. "I am the princess of the great Kingdom of Aurora. You may have temporarily erased my home and have taken everything from my people, but you will not take my dignity."
Screams of protests sounded all throughout the arena, but all I could focus on was the smirk from the man who spoke after Jung Wooyoung. It was as if he was waiting for me to say something foul so he'd have an excuse to kill me.
"Was."
It was one command and it made everybody stop. It admittedly brought shivers down my spine. It was the first time I have ever heard the King speak. His voice had this rich, silky, baritone that could bring anyone to their knees. He almost had me. He stood from the smaller throne, and I almost shrunk. He was tall, taller than any man I've seen in my life, and he was broad. His form, the way he carries himself, the regality, solidified his authority.
This was the man that killed my father, the man who destroyed Aurora, something no kingdom has even gotten close to doing. Jeong Yunho was not a man to be trifled with. "The one who speaks with a sharp tongue," he grabbed a bow and positioned it so it was pointing at me before putting the arrow on it. "It's no surprise that God wasn't on your side."
He let go and the arrow came barreling towards my direction. The force of it was so strong, I heard the 'whoosh' sound through the air. I closed my eyes and waited for the impact - waited for my death.
But it never came.
I opened my eyes and craned my head to look down and the arrow was skillfully lodged between my feet. An inch more, it would have landed on my heart.
"Seize her to the dungeons," the King waved his hand dismissively.
I didn't protest, I couldn't, when the guards started dragging me roughly to Lord-knows-where. My stomach felt like it dropped to my foot along with that arrow, the chilling reality and the instantaneous realization that I had almost died. I thought I was ready, but clearly, the terror was indescribable at the face of death. I kept a calm disposition as I was being dragged away, but I maintained eye contact with Jeong Yunho, and he knew I was scared. I could see the sadistic twinkle in his eyes.
Before I knew it, one week had passed since I was thrown down here, one week since I'd seen any sunlight, and one week since I last felt any sort of human interaction. Time flies differently when you're alone. It was driving me insane. They weren't feeding me well, but at least I wasn't shackled anymore. The isolation did give me a lot of time to think, however.
I knew what the King was doing. My father, no matter the monster he was, loved me dearly. Jeong Yunho was getting back at him by making me suffer. Chills went down all over my body at the thought of him. I had never seen anybody in general with the type of hatred Yunho had for me. It was soul-consuming. The sound of metal clanking caught my attention. It was the guard that usually gave me my food, or at least, what looked like food.
"Not up to your tastes, princess?" he said with a mocking tone. I couldn't blame him, my father had made the people of Dune suffer with his wicked ways.
I didn't reply to avoid conflict. "I'll be back in ten minutes," he continued. "The King wants you."
Fear enveloped my entire core. Has he finally decided to kill me after making me wait for one whole week? True to his words, the same guard fetched me and I was surprised to be lead to a small room with a bucket of water. Apparently I had to wash up before the King took to see me.
Or rather, kill me.
I hurriedly did as told and wore a dress that hung for me to take. It was a simple one, much like a commoner's. As we walked, I couldn't help but stare at myself through every mirrored wall we passed through. Twenty-two years as a princess, and now suddenly a prisoner - someone who was truly hated because of my father.
"Enter," a grunt sounded from inside the room when the guard knocked.
The guard left literally before Yunho was finished giving the order to come in. I took a few breaths before I walked in and closed the door behind me. It was large, unsurprisingly, and the first thing I noticed was how different the architecture was compared to my own room in Aurora. But all in all, it was as lavish as it can be. There he was, standing proudly in the middle of the room as he leaned onto what seemed to be his office table, staring at me with his arms crossed across his chest.
He still had that mask that covered half of his face, but his eyes, they made me feel so little. I stared back at him, caught off-guard that he was actually waiting for me instead of being somewhere else and passing a message to me. "How was your stay in the dungeon?" he asked rhetorically, unblinking and unrelenting.
I averted my eyes by looking down on the floor. No matter how hard he tried to keep his expression neutral, there was loathing in those eyes. There was no warmth. I wasn't human to him. I heard him walking, his shoes clacking against the greyish tiles. "Such insolence," he chuckled darkly. "Look at me."
And I did, looking straight into his eyes once more and was taken aback by the disgust that laid on them. It was the first true emotion I saw on him, no matter how negative it was. "You're going to answer when I ask something, yes?" the King snarled lowly. "I would love nothing but to punish you, trust me. Now I'm going to ask you again," he stopped walking a couple of feet away from me. "How was it?"
Angry tears started to pool in my eyes. "Good," I whispered.
He smirked, tilting his head. "Good...?"
Humiliation clogged up my tightening throat. "Good, S-Sir."
His cold, but satisfied, eyes never left me as a sadistic grin flashes upon his face. "Let's get one thing straight right now," he said. "You will address me from now on. You're my property now, got it?"
"Y-Yes, Sir."
Fear was stuck in my throat, but I didn't allow it to show because I knew all this would happen the moment Aurora fell and I was captured by the Dunean army. Yunho hummed in response. "I will break you, Y/N. That fire in your eyes right now will be gone when I'm done with you."
Shivers traveled up my spine at the sheer hatred that coated his voice when he mentioned my name. He motions for me with his finger. "Come here."
My legs felt like they had lead attached to them. I stiffly walked towards him. I stopped directly in front of him, trying my best to stand upright, but I could feel my legs shaking and giving up on me. "You acted so high and mighty at the arena earlier," he clicked his tongue. "Where is that now?"
I bunched my dress tightly in my fists. "I don't know, Sir."
It took everything in me not to back away from him and I gasped in pain when he pulled my hair back hard. Pure contempt filled his features. "Do you know what your father did?" the King hissed, his fists tightening around my hair. "Do you?"
I hate him, but my hatred towards pain was stronger. I bit my lips hard so as to not make any sound. "Yes, please, it hurts---"
I felt a hand wrap around my throat - his other hand - and terror made its way to my bones.
His face revealed nothing, he was very calm, and that was what made it worse. There was no anger, no sneer, not even a mocking stance. It was nothing. He was just staring at me choking on the air he took from me as he squeezed tighter and tighter. I resorted to clawing his arms from me as dark spots started to appear from my vision, my eyes fluttering dangerously, my consciousness steadily fading away from me.
"P-Please," I begged
"Pathetic," he spat.
Finally, he lets go and shoves me harshly. I end up losing my balance due to nausea and almost kissing the floor. I looked up to glare nastily at him, but all he gave me was a bone-chilling stare that made me feel so little.
"Get up," he commanded. I coughed harshly, not hearing him, but he wasn't having it. He grabbed my hair again and dragged me up. I yelped when he grabbed my chin and roughly tilted my head up. There was a significant height difference between us, so my neck was straining. "P-Please---"
"I despise you more than your father, do you know that?" Yunho growled.
"I-I don't understand," I quivered helplessly.
He let out a sinister chuckle. "You might not have indirectly made not only Dune, but other kingdoms as well, a living hell, but you were there. It took me years to erase your father's reign of terror."
My ears rang with each painful word and tears sprung from my eyes. "And you did absolutely nothing to stop it," he continued. I hissed when he squeezed my jaw. "I'm telling you, princess. You will be begging me to stop once I start."
"I'm sorry, I tried to stop him, I swear," I pleaded with him. "I-I'm not my father..."
He smirked darkly. "I know."
He tugged the bejeweled mask from his face, his eyes never leaving mine. I couldn't look away even if I wanted to. I froze when it finally came off, taken aback when I finally saw his face for the first time. I would always remember how beautiful he was, if not for the explosive anger that covered his expressions. His sharp nose complimented his alluring eyes and his jawline was definitely carved by God, himself. However, right now, his facial muscles are tense.
"See this?" he pointed bluntly at his face. "He had the time of his life giving me this."
I was confused at first, not knowing what he was talking about, until I looked at what he was pointing at. There was a scar that ran from his upper lip straight down his chin in a diagonal angle. I paled at the sight, not because it disgusted me, but because I truly felt for him and what he had gone through in the hands of my father. Dread filled my heart. Appearances are one of the most important things about a noble, especially a king, and my father just ruined Jeong Yunho's chances of getting taken seriously by his subjects.
My heart moved a little faster than normal when I realized that the scar never dulled his striking features - if anything, it made him even more stunning. I didn't even notice it at first.
"Open your mouth," he said. There was no expression in his eyes.
I raised my chin higher, not wanting to stall in case he actually strangled me long enough to pass out. And so, I did as told and opened my mouth wide. I cringed when he spat in my mouth, my body feeling hot when I saw a thread of saliva connecting our mouths together. It was humiliating getting spat on, let alone inside the mouth by someone who loathed me. He knew it, so he did it again.
"Swallow," he ordered. I made a sound of protest, and his eyes flashed black. It sunk in that was my fate now, and I cannot escape it.
But I was going to bear it with dignity, or what was left of it. I was born a princess, and no amount of degradation will remove my royal lineage. His lips twitched ever so slightly when I slowly swallowed his spit, and his eyes trailed down my neck where it traced my throat as it went down, and down, until his eyes snapped back at mine again.
"Your pride and arrogance astounds me," he mocked, grabbing onto my hair again and tilting my head upwards. "Let's see how far that takes you."
He leaned down and quickly ravaged my lips in a frenzied kiss. I froze, tears starting to form in my eyes. In Aurora, a woman's kiss held utmost importance. This was worse than being taken against my will. He pulled away momentarily, irritation laced upon his face. "Behave," he commanded in a different language, a language I knew well.
My chest was pained, he spoke Aurorean, which meant he knew exactly what stealing a kiss from me meant. I swallowed down the panic and humiliation and tried my very best to detach myself from the present. I nodded, afraid of another punishment from him. He grabbed my hips, his fingers painfully pressing on it, as I opened my mouth. My father saw to it that no man was to ever get near me unless they wanted a guaranteed death.
He grunted as he bit and explored every surface of my mouth, his strong hands caging me and ensuring me that I would not be able to get out of this. I whimpered in pain when he bit my lip so hard, he drew blood. The metallic taste of it spread throughout my tongue as he played with mine.
Although it was animalistic and borderline barbaric, I could have sworn he was holding back on me. And he didn't disappoint, he pulled away with the most satisfied, sadistic, unhinged smile on his face. I was mortified, taking a step back away from him.
"W-What have you done?" I whispered torturously, ignoring the pain of my now swollen lips.
"Mingi!" the King barked loudly, ignoring me.
I could feel myself slowly hyperventilating, my thoughts jumbling into a manic mess. I wiped my lips with the back of my hand, staring at him with defiance. The door slowly opened and in comes a familiar man wearing armour. "My king?" He was the tall man who pointed a sword at my throat and managed to nick the skin on it. "Your mask..."
I knew him, at least by name. Song Mingi was a household name being the Head Commander of all the armies in Dune. "Lock her there," Yunho pointed at a specific room that was connected to this chamber. "And lock her good," he stared at me with contempt. "We don't want an uprising."
I was offended, but I had no energy to contest it. Mingi didn't share the same energy. "You're not going to kill her?"
"No," he replied. "Death is too easy. Go."
Mingi hesitated. "But, sire..."
The King started to walk away but paused without a backwards glance. "Go."
I gasped when an armoured hand grabbed my arm. "You're coming with me," Mingi growled, and then we started walking.
"W-Wait, please," I tried to reason with him, but all I got was the meanest glare I've ever seen in my life so I just clamped my mouth shut. He roughly shoved me towards the room without any remorse and I surprisingly ended up landing on a bed. I quickly scrambled up to take my surroundings in.
"I don't know what Yunho is planning for you, but it's not going to be pretty," the commanding knight spat bitterly. I was surprised with the first name basis reference, but I chose to ignore it. With that, he slammed the door with a loud bang and I heard him lock it.
I realized that I was in a fairly decent sized room, but it was empty with only a bed and a dresser in it. There was also a small window by the bed, but it was barred, and even if it wasn't, jumping would be impossible since I would fall straight to my death. For the first time since my kingdom fell, my father was killed, and I was held captive, I felt real pain. I sobbed loudly, not caring if I could be heard from the outside. Heavy sobs wracked my entire body, and I wasn't sure which one hurt more - the one physical pain or the emotional pain.
Everything hurt so, so much and for a moment, I was stupid to think I could do this. Why did my father's sins have to haunt me? He was dead, damn it, so why? He was a greedy man, plundering and destroying anything that resembled a civilization in his path. He killed so much that his life was barely enough to pay for every single soul he condemned. I huddled myself in my bed, burying myself in the blanket provided as I tried to control my tears from falling. I didn't want to cry anymore, but it was so difficult to stop myself.
I have to survive, no matter what it takes. Jeong Yunho might temporarily stall me, but he will never break me.
And so another game of waiting began. Spending time in this room wasn't all bad, I wasn't getting hurt and I wasn't seeing Jeong Yunho at all, so I was able to focus on my recovery alone. Until one day, that peace was broken. I was just about to make the bed provided to me when the door suddenly opened to reveal the most majestic person I have ever seen. He had this soft yet angular face at the same time. He was pretty.
"I bid you good morning," I bowed slightly, just in case this one was a stickler for rules.
"Charmed," he replied. His voice was only slightly deeper than the King's. "Get ready. He wants you."
I frowned. I knew who he was referring to. "For what?"
He raised a brow. "It's not my place to question---"
I saw red. "So he could finally kill me?" I scoffed. "He can rot in hell for all I care."
I was beyond reasoning and this alone could get me killed, but I could care less at this point. The man narrowed his eyes at me with a dangerous stare. Finally, he sighed, entered the room and closed the door behind him. "Look," he began. "Personally, I don't have anything against you, but I also have no care if you rot in here with your insubordination."
I stared at him as I took his insults. There was a glimmer of anger and understanding in his eyes. "Don't make this harder for the both of us," he sighed. "Don't make him come here and drag you out, himself."
"Your king is an animal," I blurted out before I could stop myself.
The man raised his brows in surprise before chuckling. "Mingi was right. You are ungrateful."
"Am I supposed to be grateful for this?" I cried out.
"Yes, he let you keep your life," he snapped, surprising me. "You're not even supposed to be alive right now. You have no idea what he's capable of, you don't want to know what he's capable of."
I stared at him, not knowing what to say. "Now, if you're done," he continued. "Get dressed and follow me. There should be some in the dresser."
I gave in and did as told. I don't know what came over me, but at this point, I was too emotionally tired of thinking too much. Escaping reality seemed like a good choice right now. When I stepped out with him, Yunho was already waiting for the both of us. It seems that this was unexpected for the man who escorted me out as well and he had this startled expression on his face.
I almost wanted to hyperventilate again. Memories of what happened the last time I was here came rushing through my mind. I felt as if my lungs were shrinking in on me as I tried to breathe in when the King looked straight at me in displeasure, his eyes lingering a bit longer on my shaking hands. He looked away to turn to the man beside me. "Stellar work, Grand Duke."
I barely kept my expression when I side-eyed the taller man beside me. I just disrespected a Grand Duke because I failed to keep my cool and so far, he's only reprimanded me. There can only be one Grand Duke in this kingdom and I was rude. "You flatter me too much, Your Grace," the Grand Duke bowed his head.
The King raised a brow. "Spare me the servility, Seonghwa."
A deadly smirk paints Seonghwa's lips. "You make it sound like our captive is difficult."
"If she tries anything," Yunho gives me a nasty glare. "You'll be the first to know. Now, get out."
The air was so awkward, at least for me, when Seonghwa left. I didn't know what to do, but I wasn't going to wait.
"You called for me," I mumbled. "Sir."
He turned away to wear that black mask he was known for that covered the bottom half of his face. "Get ready. We're going to court," he ordered.
I faltered. That was a mistake on my part. The unmistakable fire of anger started to cloud his eyes. He narrowed his eyes on me. "What?" he asked threateningly. "Something the matter, prisoner?"
"I-I---" I stammered pathetically, the words getting stuck in my throat. My hesitation cost me. The King chuckled lowly at first, until it slowly turned into a sadistic laugh that bared all his teeth.
"I thought we already agreed that you will obey whatever it is I tell you?" Yunho shook his head. The ferocious glint in his eyes as he started slowly walking towards me were so dark it held no reflection against them. "I even gave you weeks to think about it alone."
Tears burned in my eyes as I averted them. "I apologize, Sir, please..."
He stops halfway all of a sudden, squinting his eyes at me in sheer fury. "Kneel."
I faltered, and he noticed. "I don't like repeating myself," he growled. "Kneel."
I sank to the ground, afraid of the consequences, my knees hitting the ground with a thud. He started walking until he was directly in front of me.
He sat down to my eye level. If he wasn't intimidating before, he certainly was now. This was the closest I've gotten to him and the proximity made me extremely nauseous. He harshly grabbed my chin, his grip was firm and ensured I never looked away from him. "Do you, perhaps, have a craving for pain, Y/N? Is that what you want?" Yunho hissed, his voice low and deadly. "Thick as you are, surely you are not that foolish?"
He paused, his hands traveling down and caressing my bruised neck. "I could collar you," a ghost of a smile. "What say you?"
Cold dread washed over me. "No, please, Sir, I-I'm sorry, don't do it..."
He didn't blink and stared at me with clear hatred. "I'm not like your father," he spat. "But the next time you displease me, I'll take drastic measures, understand?"
I nodded faster than I have ever done in my entire life. "Splendid," Yunho deadpanned. "Be on your best behaviour. Do not disgrace me."
Everything was such a blur. One second, I was kneeling beneath Jeong Yunho, the next second I was in a carriage, and the next moment, I was standing like a slave next to his throne, where he sat, while he looked on downwards. From this view, we could see everything. And we weren't alone. As usual, the Head Commander Song Mingi was there, and he was snarling at me. There were also two more people in here with us - only one of which I wasn't familiar with.
I remember the man who was on the lower level of the box stage, he was the one who told me that my life wasn't mine anymore a couple of weeks ago. It was so bold of him. The man beside him, I have never seen him before, but it was easy to see that he was a Courtier, the king's adviser. Suddenly, the bold man looked up at me and smirked treacherously. "How are you settling in, princess?"
I shrank closer to Yunho, whose face remains stoic and expressionless. I was uncomfortable at the sudden attention. I wasn't used to being held captive at all. "Don't look away," I heard Yunho whisper. He looked up at me with no expression in his eyes. "And get your hands off me or I will make sure you never get to touch anything else ever again.
I didn't even realize that I was gripping his shoulders. "I am sorry, Sir..." With that, he left in disgust.
"Cat got your tongue?" the man continued in a biting tone. "Do you even know what's happening?"
My heart dropped to my feet. I had an inkling what today was about, but it didn't hurt less.They killed my people. The man clicked at his tongue, displeased at my lack of response. "Makes me wonder why my brother didn't kill you yet," he mumbled more in wonder rather than malignance.
I frowned. I had no idea that the King had another brother. I stared at him for a second longer before I looked away. They looked so similar, but different at the same time. A huge difference was that the Second Prince, albeit snide, still had humanity in his eyes - something his older brother lacked. He left the room without a backwards glance at me.
I stared into space, imagining what my life would have been like if I wasn't born as my father's daughter. I sniffled, catching the attention of the people around me. I could see them sneer, hear them mumble under their breaths at how I was faking my grief, but I didn't care. My people were gone. I have failed them.
Even then, I didn't blame anyone but my father. Everything was his fault. A handkerchief showed itself in front of my face. "Wipe your tears now," the Courtier sighed. I didn't even notice him getting here. "Here. Take it before Yunho comes back."
Again with the first name basis. I shook my head. "I thank you, b-but I wouldn't dare accept,' I whispered, trying to keep the tears at bay. My blood boiled at the lack of care for my people, but I get it. My father was barbaric. He laughed at dying people. He was about to insist, but the Head Knight spoke. "San," Mingi began with that deep voice of his. "We have to go."
"Look alive," he said. "Everyone will be here shortly."
"W-What? Why?"
"To discuss what happened and how we'll move forward," he paused, hesitating. "Wooyoung?"
I was confused, until I turned around. I didn't even notice that there was somebody else in the room besides me and the Courtier. He began to walk towards us. "To discuss whether we should bury the dead," the King's right-hand deadpanned. "To discuss if we should include you."
"Knock it off," San warned in a heavy tone.
Wooyoung scoffed. "What?" he dared. "It's the truth. Better now than be knocked for six later."
I gulped nervously. "You hate me though," I mumbled.
He raised a tentative brow. "I do," he confirmed. "Your father killed my brother. Callously, might I add."
My breath hitched at the new information, though I wasn't surprised at all to hear it. "Jung Woohyun, was it?"
A flicker of surprise crosses Wooyoung's face. "Yes," he said slowly. "You knew him?"
I shook my head. I knew the names of each and everyone that my father had deliberately killed. I didn't do it on purpose, I just couldn't forget out of guilt. So I did the thing I knew best. I sank slowly to the ground and bowed lowly until my forehead hit the floor. "I offer my deepest apologies to you, Sir. Though I am aware that my words do not hold any weight..."
There was a tense silence in the room. I felt a shaking hand try to help me get up. Wooyoung's eyes held great anger, but they shone with intense sadness. "Your apology will never bring him back," he vehemently spat. "Though I appreciate it, nonetheless."
"That's enough for now," San interrupted, much to my relief. "Everyone is coming."
Right on cue, the doors opened and in came barreling in nobles and officials, all of whom I have never seen before, and the familiar face of Grand Duke Seonghwa alongside someone whose face was the epitome of nobility, itself. I have never seen someone so handsome before. Lastly, Jeong Yunho, the King, himself walked in with all the grace that none of the other nobles had, and behind him was the Second Prince. I took my position to stand like a slave near the King's throne while he sat down next to his brother's smaller one.
"That's the princess?" a man who was well into his fifties pointed at me. "My, she's a thing of beauty!"
I bit back a whimper at all the unwanted attention directed towards me and inched closer to Yunho's throne. A murmur of agreement resounded through the entire room and I cringed inwardly at the blatant display of lust and salaciousness in the eyes of the noblemen who stared at me. I lowered my head, refusing to be the subject of such disgusting thoughts.
"Too bad she's Aurorean," another nobleman chuckled. "I would have loved to taste that..."
That seemed to open a can of worms. Everybody seemed to momentarily forget that I was the daughter of one of the most vicious kings that ever lived, and it automatically made me the center of all of their hatred.
"Oh, our benevolent king," a nobleman bowed in front of us. "I plead that we take the Aurorean princess as an offer to appease your people."
"Heed our words, Our King!"
"Hear 'ye, hear 'ye!"
I swallowed the panic and humiliation that was threatening to spill from my mouth and I tried to back out to avoid the attention, but it was useless. I could feel my muscles straining and my throat closing up in dread.
"You're not going to let them do this, aren't you?" the King's younger brother frowned in disapproval. "This is barbaric and unbecoming of our kingdom, no matter the deed!"
I could feel my hands shaking in anxiety, is this one of the punishments that Yunho had planned for me? I stared at San, possibly the only person who had shown me mercy so far, and I could see the apprehension brewing in his eyes as he and Wooyoung looked at one another. The King didn't say a word. He continued to stare and watch the commotion unfold. The noblemen took this as a 'yes' and began to approach me, but the Second Prince stopped them.
"Halt!" his loud voice boomed, angrily standing up and glaring at everyone who dared to move. "This is preposterous!"
"But Prince Jongho, our beloved Second Prince, Aurora had shown no mercy on thy people when we were suffering!"
"Aye!"
I saw the said Prince's eyes narrow in disgust. I would've been glad to finally put a name to the man keeping my dignity, even if his reasons weren't beneficial for me, but the situation was bad. "You're right, I despise her as well, but we are not them," he gritted his teeth. He abruptly turned to the King. "Brother!" he exclaimed. "You can't let them do this! Park Seonghwa, get up here!"
But the King didn't care. Before the Grand Duke could even get up from his chair, half of the noblemen protested as if they were slighted. "The King's words, or lack thereof," Seonghwa glared at Yunho. "Are final. I'm sorry, my prince."
I looked at the Second Prince in gratitude but all he did was snarl. "Do what you wish," Prince Jongho got up and opened the door to leave, slamming it to make a point.
I cried out when I felt my arms being grabbed as I was being dragged in the middle of the room. Tears filled my eyes when I was released harshly, keeping my head down so I wouldn't have to see their wretched faces. "Good Lord, she's exquisite," I heard someone from above me groan.
I heard all the men hum in approval. I tried to detach myself from all of this - I tried to remember my childhood, my mother, and my good servant and friend, Ilri. I missed her. She would have comforted me in my times of need. I looked up to stare at Yunho. He wasn't doing anything, he was relaxed, even. Our eyes met and he just stared back without any sort of expression.
"It all ends here," the filthy nobleman who suggested this in the first place growled. I gasped when he held out a sharp knife in front of my face. "You will pay for everything!"
I cried out loud when the knife swung and I subconsciously brought my hands to my face. My arms took the hit and they were bleeding badly, but the adrenaline to survive had kept me going. Once again, I turned to look back at Yunho, hoping that my tear-stained eyes were pleading enough for him to save me from this nightmare. He was the only one who can save me, even though I don't deserve it.
I blinked back tears as I talked to him with my eyes. I remember the first time I saw him back in Aurora. Even though he had the same mask he did back then like the one he had on right now, I vaguely remember thinking how majestic he was. I remember the anger, the anguish, his declaration of war with my father and my kingdom. I snapped out of my daydream and my arms were pulled back and I started twisting to free myself when I realized that these noblemen were really going to kill me right here, right now.
I whimpered with a broken voice, something I doubt anyone heard in all the commotion that was happening.
"Enough," the King's firm voice sounded.
Yunho had no need to raise his voice or force anybody to listen. Not a sound was heard throughout the whole room except for my hysterical sobs of relief. It was the most intense feeling I have ever experienced and I used what was left of my adrenaline to scramble towards him and hide myself. I knew this man was bound to finish the job that these noblemen didn't in the future, but right now I didn't care. I'd rather die by his hands than these vultures that want to eat me alive.
"Your Grace? What seems to be the matter?" the nobleman seethed in anger. "You did not seem to deny our pleas earlier!"
"But I never told you to go ahead either, did I?" Yunho raised a brow. He got up from his throne and started to descend. I got behind him to shield myself.
The noblemen all protested in anger. "My King, we all know how much you hate her! She is an abomination in this world, she ruined everyone's lives! She deserves to die! Her father killed the Third Prince!"
I halted abruptly when Yunho stilled in his steps. His back was tense - that nobleman hit a nerve. I whimpered, this was it for me. The nobleman was not wrong; my father did kill the Third Prince. It was a well-known fact that the Third Prince was beloved. Yunho stepped closer to the crowd. I was about to trot like a coward towards him when I felt a hand stop me. I looked up and Seonghwa was shaking his head as a warning. His stance visibly made everybody uncomfortable. "She is my prisoner. She belongs to the King, who happens to be me."
His voice was dangerously low. "You do not dictate to me what to do with her. If the event comes that her life will end, I am the only one allowed to do it because I own her. She is mine."
I gasped when Yunho yanked me harshly towards him. I landed on his chest and when I looked up, his face was expressionless as usual. He lifted his mask a bit to lean down and our lips connected for the second time since we've met, then he pulled away just as fast. That shut up anybody that dared to question him, but the silence was deafening. This time, I didn't have the ability to resent him for it. I'd kiss him a million times if he'd saved me the same amount.
Yunho turned around towards the door with authority and no one dared question it. "Send Prince Jongho back to punish these cretins."
I followed him helplessly until we were back in his chambers. I jumped a bit when he slammed the door hard. He pulled his mask away from his face and threw it away into nowhere in particular. I can't say I'm surprised when I saw how enraged he was. His eyes were wide with anger and his lips were set into a fine line.
I gulped. "Y-Your Grace?"
"What?" Yunho snapped and I almost backed out.
"I-I just wanted to thank---"
"Don't," he cut off, his expression dark. "I didn't do it for you. What even gave you that idea?"
My cheeks reddened in embarrassment. "You are most right, Sir. I apologize..."
Thick silence enveloped the room. I couldn't take my eyes off of him, and stared back at me with equal remorse. I was left to wonder what his reasons were, though I knew I would get punished if I asked why.
"You were ready to die that day."
I resisted the urge to look away from him, momentarily confused at what he was referring to. Then, I remembered. He was referring to the day when I was supposed to be executed. "I wasn't," I replied truthfully, hoping it was sincere enough. "No one is ever ready to die."
Yunho crossed his arms. "Why didn't you avoid the arrow, then?"
"Because I know you wouldn't do it...Sir."
He smirked at my boldness. "Admirable. Not many idiots have this type of audacity."
He stared at me long and hard, and I was sure he would demand for me to kneel, but all he did was turn around after. "Get out of my sight."
I didn't waste any time before he changed his mind. I scurried back to the room provided for me and quickly sat on the edge of my bed in exhaustion. I hissed in pain, remembering that my arm was slashed. I quickly inspected it and whimpered when I saw that the cut was deep.
"Oh God," I whispered, pressing the first cloth I saw on the wound, not caring if there would be blood on it, though I can't say I'm too upset about it. This was bound to happen and I'm surprised that it took this long for my blood to spill. It's been over a month since I've been captured, imprisoned, threatened.
A knock on the door startled me. I frowned, who could it be? Do they know I'm here? No one would be respectful enough to knock on a prisoner's door. "C-Come in..."
The Knight Commander entered briskly and behind him was Courtier Choi San and another man I have never seen before. "This is Kang Yeosang," San introduced. "He's a Duke but also a surgeon."
I quickly stood up and bowed my head in respect. It saddened me that I got used to it, but honestly, I couldn't care less anymore. "A surgeon?" I asked. "I'm confused."
The man, Yeosang, pointed at my bleeding arm. "That looks bad. Do you mind?"
I frowned, apprehension filling my guts. "You're going to...treat my arm?"
"Yes? You're wounded, why wouldn't I?"
Because I am the King's prisoner and I am lower than a slave, and slaves certainly do not get treated for any type of injury caused by nobles.
"Why? He does not fit your standards?" Mingi scoffed, and that earned him a glare from the San. I ignored him and went ahead to sit down on my bed and Duke Yeosang followed suit. He held my arm and clicked his tongue as he observed the long gash.
"Unfortunately, you need stitches," he mumbled. "I can administer them to you, but it will be very painful."
My heart dropped to my foot, but I nodded nonetheless. Yeosang gave me a colourful batch of crystal-looking things. "They're calming lozenges," he said when I hesitated to take them. "It's not going to get rid of the pain, but hopefully they will make it easier for you."
"T-thank you, Duke," I gratefully accepted them.
"Yeosang is fine," he waved his hand dismissively. I was surprised but opted not to say anything. He began tying a cloth around my arm. "This is to help lessen the bleeding---"
"A tourniquet, I'm aware," I blurted out before I could stop myself. Yeosang let out the smallest smile and nodded in agreement. I popped the lozenges in my mouth and automatically, the taste of lavender coats my mouth. I bit hard on it when I felt a needle poke onto my skin and I groaned loudly, surprised at how painful it actually was.
"So," San started. "How come you never gave me those lozenges, Yeo?"
I knew what he was doing - a conversation was better than fat silence. I screamed in pain when the needle pierced my skin.
"I need you to stay still, princess," Yeosang frowned. Tears formed in my eyes, but I obliged. "Anyway, it's because you don't deserve them, San."
"Seriously? I would have gone to the end of the world for you!"
"Then stay there," the Duke deadpanned. "Breathe in for me."
"O-Okay," I trembled. I took the deepest breath in and the searing pain in my arm almost made me want to vomit at the very least.
I saw San, and even Mingi, wince when I looked up. I had this urge to look straight and past the door, at the very end of his room, the King was there staring into the room. Yunho stared at Yeosang doing his work on my arm and I resisted the urge to scream again, but all in vain. He took one good look at me before leaving entirely.
"You know I can't live without you," San chuckled, still trying to lighten the atmosphere.
"Then die," Yeosang hissed. "Both of you, out!"
"And you," Yeosang's eyes found mine when we were all alone. "I heard about what happened in court. You better check your attitude if you don't want to be a corpse before this year ends."
He paused. "That was what everyone did when your father was still king."
I cringed, both from my words and the pain, but I can't even refute him. "No matter what I do, your King will punish me either way."
"He's not like that," he shook his head. "I'm sure you know how brutal he can get, but you also know he's very fair and just."
"Not with me, no," I smiled bitterly. "Though I understand."
"Believe it or not, he's actually holding back with you."
Blood rushed all the way to my head, but Yeosang wasn't done. "If he wants to get back at you for everything your father did, he would kill you, resurrect you, then kill you again. Wash, rinse, repeat."
Goosebumps erupted all over my body at what I just heard. "All done," he muttered, like he didn't just say the most terrifying thing I've heard in a while. "Go easy on yourself," Yeosang looked at me, but I had a feeling he was talking about something else. Then, he left.
What did he mean that Yunho was holding back?
It had been a couple of months since that. After my recovery, I've been sent all over the palace, but mostly, it's just the King either asking me to do odd stuff or keep me in my quarters. Nothing had changed, Yunho was still the terrifying person who had imprisoned me, but what's keeping me going was Yeosang talking to me a lot. I learned a few things about him, like how he never wanted to be Duke in the first place, but other than him, I've been quite lonely.
Yesterday, I was sent to the kitchen to serve food for the other nobles, but I was isolated on purpose. Whenever I had to eat, they would 'forget' me. Sometimes I don't even eat the food. Everybody dislikes me, especially the servants and other maids. Certain days, I'd find that my food either resembled animal feed or was just straight up rotten. But honestly, it's okay. At least nobody was hurting me. They hate me knowing that I was the former princess of Aurora.
The other week, it was the gardens, but I got lost because the gardens were so huge. Yunho had lost his mind trying to find me, himself. Needless to say, he had locked me in my room until yesterday, but that turned out to be a dud either. At this point, Yunho was really going to kill me.
I should ask him if there was anything I could do around, mostly so he wouldn't kill me. I took a peek outside the room, surprised that my door was not locked, and stepped out. My room - my prison - was directly connected to Yunho's room so automatically, I was within his space. As expected, the room reflected his sophistication. Suddenly, I noticed another door at the far corner. Against my better judgment, I walked through and realized it was a small balcony.
"My goodness," I whispered in amazement as I scanned the beautiful view with my eyes. Yunho had never struck me as a person who enjoyed the little things in life. I took a deep breath and smiled when fresh air hit my nose and filled my lungs. It had been a while since I was able to relax, to be able to feel like I was myself again.
I must've lost time because I suddenly felt a chill enveloping me. Maybe it was my nerves, because I knew I wasn't supposed to be here.
"Interesting."
I jumped a bit, startled. I turned around and saw Yunho standing by the door with his arms crossed. I immediately felt dread and twisted my hands together in fear and submission.
"S-Sir, I'm---"
He was furious, disdain written all over his face. "Come here."
I yelped when he pinned me against the balcony railing, his big hands completely encasing my wrists. He dug his nails on my skin and I looked up at him, pleading for him to spare me. One mistake and I could go tumbling down my demise. "Don't look at me like that," he snarled. "It's taking everything in me not to throw you out down there."
It made me realize, am I able to outdo my father's sins one day? He let me go and turned around. "Never let me see you in here again," his voice hardened. "Get inside."
I walked behind him, my heart pounding uncontrollably inside my chest, and in there was his right-hand man, his brows shot up in mild shock. "Did Yeosang not lock the door?" Wooyoung asked. "I told him not to," Yunho relayed, walking to sit down on the chair he always sat on when he was being an actual king and doing his duty. "A test of some sort..."
He leaned his hand on the table and stared at me. "And you failed."
I didn't know what to expect, but I should have expected that. He wanted to see if I was going to escape. "I-It's not what---"
"Save it. I don't care," he snapped. "We're going to have to straighten you out."
We?
I have never felt so vulnerable in my entire life. Yunho alone was enough to frighten me, but Wooyoung has told me he never liked me. And speaking of Wooyoung, he wasn't even baffled. His face had no distinct expression to it. I had no idea what he thought of this.
"Sit on the table," Yunho commanded. I got moving and tried to jump slightly and sit on the wooden oak table, but it was too high since Yunho was a big man. I had to use a stool to even try and get up. I tried not to whimper when I felt hands grab my waist to hoist me up and lift me effortlessly until I sat at the edge of the table with my legs dangling over it. My feet couldn't even reach the floor.
I closed my eyes and looked down on my lap to avoid making eye contact with whoever it was, but I knew it wasn't Yunho. A hand opened my knees and I was forced to look up at Wooyoung as he gently inched himself in between them so now his midriff was pressing up against me. I couldn't help but freeze, I never realized how attractive Wooyoung was before. "You are going to learn your place," Yunho spoke again, his voice taut. "You are no longer Aurorean, and Aurora is not your place anymore because you do not belong there."
What does that even mean? I tried to squirm away but Wooyoung's hands held my shoulders. There wasn't any force to it. I looked at him apprehensively and he only shook his head at me. "You're going to have to erase every bit of what you've known all your life," Yunho continued. I turned to stare at him and all he gave was a snarl. "You are the King's, not Y/N, not a princess, nothing."
All the blood drained from my face. It dawned on me what this 'lesson' was going to be about. Yunho had taken everything from me - my home, my family, my freedom - but being Aurorean still lives inside me. Wooyoung's face relaxed when he saw the realization on my face. "I'm going to teach you how to kiss, Y/N. You have to learn how to," he paused to look me in the eyes. "Not to be you anymore. That means you don't need to abide by the Aurorean tradition."
The legend was that the gods and goddesses used to marry in the sacred land of Aurora. Every time they kissed to seal the marriage, prosperity would bring itself upon the people and good luck would flourish. Even my father, as evil as he was, never screwed around the tradition.
And now, they want me to give it up. I tried to stay still, to relax my body, but I couldn't. Wooyoung leaned down dangerously close to my neck. "Sometimes, we have to do things we don't want in order to survive," he lowered his voice even more. "Nod if you understand."
I swallowed tightly, but nodded anyway. He continued. "Yunho is doing you a favour, deviating from your tradition does not make you less of a person, but you have to set it aside so you can survive. You saw how fucked up the other nobles are. Do not give them the satisfaction of seeing you fold."
His statement hit me a lot harder than I thought. With that, he leaned down and pressed his lips against mine. His eyes watched me observantly before he slowly started to move. I didn't know what I was even doing, so I closed my eyes. "Just move along with me," Wooyoung murmured. Tension filled me, no matter how hard I tried, I couldn’t get myself to relax.
Obscene kissing sounds filled the room and I couldn't help but be saddened at the kiss I tried very hard to preserve. I felt Wooyoung's tongue trying to probe my mouth open and out of surprise, I opened my mouth to accommodate him.
"Very good," he hummed in approval in between kisses. "You can use your tongue, as well."
He was very patient with it. After a while, he taught me how to kiss back, what to do, and what not to do, and he kept complimenting me in between. I was suddenly glad that it was Wooyoung and not Yunho doing this with me. I opened my eyes momentarily and saw Yunho looking at us, or rather, just me. Suddenly, a burst of confidence went through me and a great urge to do well boosted me, but not for Wooyoung. I wanted to please Yunho, because he was watching.
Wooyoung groaned softly when I bit his lip and I felt his erection press against my thigh. His hands began roaming against my body, reaching lower until they reached my hips. "That's enough, Wooyoung," Yunho commanded, his voice cold and uncaring.
The latter pulled away and leaned his forehead against mine, but not before giving me another peck on my lips and then my head. "You did good, Y/N. You're going to be fine," Wooyoung tucked my hair behind my ears, surprising me.
He turned around and bowed to Yunho, who was now standing and staring. "Your Highness."
"Get out."
Wooyoung hesitated, but gave in and left the room. I was apprehensive, lost in thought, when I felt another body replace Wooyoung in between my thighs. I looked up, and I really had to look up, and saw Yunho staring down at me. He leaned down, just like Wooyoung did. "Well done," he whispered. "I have to reward you for being good, so you have to be good all the time."
My mind went haywire. My father never exercised the reward system. I had so many questions, but mostly, I was just afraid he'd hurt me. "Tomorrow, I instructed Seonghwa and Yeosang to go into town to extract some jewelry," Yunho said. "You will go with them to discern if they're real or fake. You know how to distinguish them, yes?"
I nodded, not knowing where this was going. "Splendid," he hummed. "Mingi will accompany you, consider that as free time. But mark my words, I will burn this city down just to find you if you escape. Don't be a fool."
"I understand, Sir," I mumbled, confused if this was a trap or not so he can finally have an excuse to kill me.
Yunho stared at me for a minute or two longer before he withdrew himself and walked away. "You're excused."
That night, I spent the whole time thinking about what just happened. Besides my disdain about my tradition being squashed, I was left wondering if that trip with the Dukes tomorrow was the reward he was talking about. It was certainly odd, was he being lenient on me? That was a reward in itself.
The next day, I found out what he truly meant. It was how I found myself in the town square walking in between Dukes Yeosang and Seonghwa and trailing behind us was a grumpy Mingi. "Try to keep this on, please," Seonghwa fixed the hood that covered my face a bit. "We can't risk you being seen out here."
Temporary freedom. I understand why I was here, the town was beautiful - Dune was beautiful in general. I adjusted the hood myself and tried to look around in fascination. On the outside, Aurora looked like this as well. The main difference was the people of Dune looked happy and were happy. The facade was so obvious back home that it hurts my heart to remember it as we walked past the town, but I was happy that people here found the happiness that my father stole once.
"Right there," Yeosang pointed out somewhere that I didn't even bother looking at. "They should be in there."
The four of us went inside this tavern, the type that was closed during the mornings. Seonghwa led us to the back part of the place and there were two people who looked like thugs waiting for us.
"Who's that?" a gruff voice pointed at me. Seonghwa bought his arm protectively in front of me when they tried to pull my cloak off.
"She will be your ticket to live," the Grand Duke glared. "Because if the gems are fake, I will personally slit your throats."
The thugs glared back but didn't say anything back. Instead, they grabbed their pouch and presented them to all of us. Seonghwa grabbed it, took one good look, before giving it for me to inspect. I was a bit surprised to find various gems of various sizes. There were the obvious diamonds, emeralds, sapphires, but I was surprised to see lesser valued stones, which were still considered expensive but definitely not ones that royals would own. My eyes gleamed when I saw amethysts and pearls, my personal favourites, but frowned when I stared closer. I did what I could, touch them, feel them to gauge my thoughts.
"Well?" Yeosang asked when he saw me frown.
I took a deep breath before I spoke. "Everything but the amethysts were real."
"Impossible!" the thugs seethed at me, charging fast before anybody could stop them. "You lying whore! I ought to---wait, you look familiar."
My blood ran cold but I tried to remain calm. "I-I know nothing--"
Mingi pulled me back as Seonghwa drew his sword to point it at the oncoming thugs. "Swindling bastards," he scoffed. "The amethyst was the one we were looking for too..."
It was in slow motion, one minute everybody was arguing about the fake amethyst and the next, my cloak was being pulled off unknowingly, therefore, blowing my cover. "You're that princess!" the thugs exclaimed in surprise and disgust.
It was too late before they could be stopped, they began charging at full speed as they hollered for the other thugs. I was frozen, never in my life have I experienced something like this.
"Son of a bitch," Yeosang hissed as he snatched the forgotten pouch. "This was their plan all along, what now?"
Seonghwa looked conflicted before he made a split decision. "Run."
I was pushed harshly by someone and I ran along with everyone as fast as I could. I took a peek behind us and saw no less than ten people chasing us down. It was definitely the adrenaline, I could never run like this in normal circumstances. I screamed loudly when I felt my dress being pulled back, halting me abruptly from running. I wasn't sure if I was loud enough, but apparently I was because in a second, Mingi swung his sword down my dress and ripped it apart from the thugs.
"Let's go!" he shouted at me. He pulled and launched me in front of him in a hurry and I thought we were doing well. I heard a groan of pain and saw that Mingi's lower leg was bleeding from what looked like an arrow graze. I halted and tried to run back to him, but he glared at me fiercely.
I nodded and ran, realizing that Seonghwa and Yeosang were separated from us, but at this point, I couldn't really care about it. I just hope they were safe. Soon enough, the both of us were able to hide in a narrow alleyway. We stayed unmoved, not breathing, and nervous as we hid. When we were sure that they were truly gone, we finally let out a long sigh of relief and slumped against the wall.
"Thank you," I breathed out towards the knight. He doesn't respond, he doesn't even spare me a glance. I frowned, my eyes trailing down his bleeding leg. "That looks bad," I whispered.
He raised a brow and finally turned to me. "Maybe because it is," Mingi snapped. I was used to this type of treatment so at this point I was immune to it. I stood up and his eyes followed my form as I began to lift up my dress. His shocked expression was the last thing I saw before he turned around. "What are you doing?!" he hissed, his ears red.
I ripped a part of my already torn dress into a strip and leaned down next to him. "Stick your leg out, please."
I tried to put my hands forward and he jerked away. "Don't you dare touch me," he snarled lowly at me and for a second, I hesitated. "Please, it's my fault--"
"I'll do it and, what, you're going to poison me?"
"No! I mean, no. If I do, feel free to kill me," I pleaded. "Just give me a chance, I-I won't bother you again if you say no."
He contemplated for a few minutes. Surprisingly, he does as he was told, finally realizing my intentions. He watched as I skillfully wrapped the cloth on his leg enough to stop the blood and hopefully avoid any infections. "You are surprisingly good with this," he commented with the softest tone I've heard him speak towards me when he realized I wasn't going to hurt him.
"Let me know if it's too tight," I let out a small smile, completely ignoring his probing look.
There was silence on his end as he stared at me calculatingly. "Thank you," Mingi finally uttered, the traces of spite I was so used to seeing on him when looked at me gone for now.
"W-Wait, you're not supposed to," I tried to stop him when he stood up and stretched his injured leg.
Mingi shrugged. "We have to go back," he stated. "The King will punish you if you're not back yet."
"I don't care," I frowned. His eyes widened slightly. "You're injured, we can stay a bit."
He chuckled and began walking anyway. "No offense, but I've been to war. A graze to the leg isn't going to kill me."
I blushed in embarrassment. He was right, how could I forget that he led an entire military fleet?
When we walked back to the carriage that took us here, Seonghwa and Yeosang were already there, the relief in their faces disappearing when they saw Mingi's bleeding leg and my torn dress. We filled each other in on what happened and I was glad to know that the two of them were able to lose the thugs pretty quickly.Soon enough, we reached the palace and I felt a little sad. I was about to go back to my reality here and I wasn't ready.
"Thank you for what you did with Mingi," Seonghwa chatted while we all walked towards my quarters.
"Y-You're thanking me?" I asked a little bit in surprise.
"Of course," Yeosang frowned, then the realization hit him. "What you did was still worth praise, whether you are a princess or not."
For the first time, I smiled brightly. I forgot how good it felt when people appreciated you rather than speak you with contempt. Mingi was about to say something, but we were interrupted by a panicked looking San approaching us. "What's the matter?" Mingi asked instead.
"You're late," San sighed tiredly. "And he's angry."
Alarm bells started going off in my brain. One thing that I noticed before everyone else even told me was that Yunho was very strict in his time management. It's the one thing that gets him automatically angry when things deviate from said time. And with that, the three of us ventured to the royal chamber. I was outright shaking at every step I took. The King's room was at the isolated part of the palace and from a distance, we all could hear raised voices and some stuff getting thrown off and hitting hard surfaces.
When Yeosang opened the door, the room was in slight disarray, the obvious culprit was the seething King glaring at the three of us as his chest rose up and down in anger. The Second Prince was sitting cross-legged at the couch looking the most relaxed as if he was so used to seeing his older brother lose his temper often. Yeosang walked towards him and whispered something in his ears. It was tense as Yunho continued glaring at me specifically. I'm surprised I haven't dropped dead yet by how hard he was looking at me. Jongho's brows raised slightly as he took a glance at my torn dress and Mingi's leg before nodding and following Yeosang out of the room.
"Just think about what I said," Jongho voiced out before completely leaving the room. Then it was three. It reminded me of my very first time setting foot in this room, Mingi had been there to watch the scene unfold before he dragged me to the quarters. That day felt like a fever dream.
"Close the fucking door," Yunho uttered after a few tense minutes. I was about to move and do as told when he stopped me. "Not you," he hissed. "Come here."
The prominent veins bulging on his temples made me swallow the saliva I hadn't noticed collecting from the hollows of my mouth. His face and tone did not give away his emotion, but I knew for a fact that this was the angriest I have ever seen him since I had met him. "Convince me," Yunho taunted after he sat on the couch where Jongho was earlier. "Convince me not to kill you right now."
I bunched my unkempt dress in my fists because of how scared I was. It doesn't escape the King's attention and he purses his lips in displeasure.
"It's not her fault," Mingi jumped in when he saw my eyes wavering. "Not entirely anyway."
He took a moment to stare at our state - how disheveled we both were - but he didn't seem to care. He turns to the Head Knight with narrowed eyes. "Walk away," he said calmly, too calmly.
"But---"
"Now."
Mingi took one good look at Yunho and with a dejected sigh, he quietly left the chambers. I felt a mix of fear, comfort, and assurance. Mingi and I weren't buddies by all means but it was the first time somebody had directly defended me in front of the King and it was refreshing.
"Let me explain for all of us," I said out loud. I wasn't sure where that burst of confidence was coming from, but it felt good. I felt like I was a princess again after so long.
Yunho raised a brow, eyes slowly morphing from surprise to anger. "No."
At the end of the day, I was still afraid of him overall. "S-Sir, with all due respect I just wanted to explain---"
"Whatever happens outside that doesn't involve me directly, I have no concern, no power over it, slave. You best wise up because I am losing my patience with you," Yunho stated with no expression. I shuffled my feet, my heart stilling when I realized that after all of this, I still can't face up to him. One word and I know he will either have me executed or just finish me off, himself. "You do realize that I tolerate you simply because I'm not ready to kill you yet?" Yunho roughly lifted my chin up so I could meet his eyes. "The goal is to slowly break you, yes?"
Tears began to pool at the corner of my eyes. That look in his eyes, it was the same look my father had when he was about to do something very sinister. I began to whimper when he started to lean down again, but instead of the usual stolen kisses, he leaned down my ear. "I'll let you in on a little secret," he whispered. "I know everything that goes around. Including what happened. I even knew the amethysts were fake."
Everything clicked all at once. He didn't need me to verify if the gemstones were real or not - he just wanted to see if I was capable of following the rules and not escape once I'm given the opportunity. "However," he leaned away. "You do need to be punished. You were late, but you know what?"
I looked at him expectantly and he continued. "There was a small part of me that wishes you did disobey me. I would have had a reason to kill you for good."
He tucked my hair out from my face behind my ear with the coldest look in his eyes. Shivers traveled down my spine when he traced my now exposed collarbone lightly. "Don't you think it would be a shame if your skin gets branded?"
At first I didn't understand what he meant, but when it hit me, all the blood started traveling up to my head and effectively giving me intense nausea. I started to beg. "P-Please don't---"
"Why not?" he sarcastically asked. He unbuttoned his shirt - or rather, he pulled roughly on it and the buttons loosened - and set a section of his shirt aside to reveal a nasty burn on his smooth, otherwise flawless skin. "We have to get even somehow."
Horror replaced my expression of fear and terror. My father branded and burned his skin as a form of torture. I swallowed as I looked at the scarred area, finally understanding the extent of his anger and hatred towards me. He must've been through a lot. "So, how about it, Y/N?" Yunho buttoned his shirt back. "The goal is to slowly break you, yes?"
Acceptance passed through me, and I felt like I was separated from my body. "Go ahead. I-I don't hate you," I blurted out.
His brows shot up in amusement. "Interesting. Why?"
I bit my lip, hesitating if I should tell him or not, but it was too late to back out at this point. "I don't want to give you more power than you deserve over me. I simply don't care about you, even though I know why you're doing this to me."
In an instant, I regretted my decision. Yunho's face slowly transformed from neutral to pure hatred in a couple of seconds. His entire face reddens in anger and I yelped when he grabbed my arm and began dragging me roughly towards his side of the room and threw me on his bed. He hovered over me quickly. His eyes were becoming so red from anger and the usual scowl in his face was getting deeper and deeper. My heart sank, he was so beautiful even when he was on the brink of going insane with rage. "You're going to submit to me," he gritted his teeth as he seethed in anger. "Consider this another lesson, you know what I'm going to do to you right now?"
I shook my head frantically when he started to blindfold me. He barked at me loudly to stay still and my body just froze in complete fear. The blindfold had completely darkened my sight and all my pleas were getting ignored. I felt Yunho get off of me and I heard him walk towards the far end of the room. When your sight is taken out, all the other senses become even stronger.
"You can thank your father for the wonderful scar he gave me," Yunho's voice was coming from the very front of the bed. I heard metal clinking against one another and my body froze in realization. “But I’m not going to,” he whispered. "Open your eyes."
"W-Why?" I whispered.
"Your father made me into the monster that I am, this is just a taste, but I wouldn't do it to my worst enemy."
He stood up and urged me to follow him. I wiped my tears and got up to follow him. I have nothing to lose at this point. I followed him towards the section of his chambers I haven't been before and was a bit surprised to find shelves upon shelves of books. I stared in awe, my father never let me read, but it never stopped me from sneaking out and learning anyway.
"Pick one and take it," Yunho gestured to the shelves. "And pick well. You won't have this opportunity again."
"How did you know I can read?" I asked, my voice scratchy.
"I just do. Hurry up before I change my mind."
It didn't take a while for me to decide what I wanted. There was this specific book I've always wanted to read but I couldn't because it wasn't accessible to just anyone. I looked around and found exactly what I wanted. I tiptoed to reach it because unfortunately, it was perched very high. Figures. The owner of the book was a foot taller than me. My cheeks warmed when I felt heat directly behind me. I looked up to see Yunho, his arms outstretched. I couldn't help but stare at him. He had such sharp yet delicate features at the same time. Subjectively and objectively, there was no denying that he was beautiful. He was the dark, melancholic type of beauty.
"Divine Comedy," Yunho raised his brow as he handed me the book. "Interesting choice."
I nodded, not knowing what to say. "Thank you for the book, Sir."
Yunho hummed in response, his eyes held no expression as usual. He took one look at me before walking towards the door. "Organize my suits and pair them with my pants according to your liking. I'm not sure what time I'll be back, but I'll send someone if I don't."
He was like this. Sometimes, he would ask me to do odd jobs for him here and there, like he didn't just threaten me. I had a sneaking suspicion that it was so I didn't even think of escaping - not that I could, his chambers were heavily guarded - but I digress. I did what I was told. It was easier than I thought since Yunho seemed to be a very organized person, himself. I couldn't help but realize how much I've memorized the way he wanted certain things - he did like blue a lot, disliked velvet, and the little things that went unnoticed by many.
But so far, I haven't been asked to work somewhere else. Mostly, I would just stay in my quarters or Yunho would call me out for certain things. The other maids and servants had found ways to sabotage me. The last time I was out, I was asked to do the laundry, but the servants locked me in the drying room. Yunho almost executed me on the spot even though it wasn't my fault. I got distracted and I opened the book given to me. It had been a while since I felt like myself again and I was doing anything to preserve the little happiness I had right now before it went away again.
"Wow," I exclaimed in awe as I turned the book from page to page, genuinely excited to be able to finally read again.
I sat on Yunho's bed, biting my lip in apprehension. It was just a few moments and a couple of pages before I went back to work again. Besides, he said he wasn't going to come back, right?
For once in my life, I wanted to give in and just do what I wanted, and so I did. Yunho's bed was much softer than mine so the added comfort was giving me pure bliss as I continued reading on.
Soon enough, all the events that happened today were all forgotten as I got lost into another world that wasn't mine.
"How long do you think it's been?"
"I don't know, and I don't care."
"Really? You've never let any woman in your room, much less sleep on your bed, Yun."
"I didn't know you were so obsessed with me, Uncle."
"Don't call me that, brat. Anyway, should I wake her up?"
"No. Leave her alone."
It was one of those moments where it felt like my soul was separated from my body. I could hear everything, but for some reason, my brain wasn't connecting anything and my spirit wasn't waking up. I was aware that there were two voices, one of which was Yunho. All the fatigue caught up to me and I let myself fall back asleep once more.
This bed was the most comfortable thing I've ever been in. It wasn't the quality of it, the one I had back home was softer and bigger, but the solace it brought upon me, though I never understand why.
"You didn't finish your chores."
I squeezed my eyes shut before I sat up. There was no point in pretending since he knows anyway. Yunho didn't even bother to look at me, he was busy writing on a parchment and reading a book at the same time. "I apologize, Your Highness."
I realized my mistake when he paused a bit. Yunho had never told me to call him anything other than 'Sir' before, and surprisingly, he didn't comment on it. "Apologies won't get them done," he grumbled. "I didn't mean to sleep on your bed," I moved to take the blanket off. "I'll just---"
He put a hand up to halt me. "Stay. I need to ask you a few questions."
I nodded, unconsciously grabbing the blanket and wrapping myself around it. I felt a little exposed, though I'm sure Yunho would never look at me in that way, but the way he was looking at me right now, it left me a bit unnerved.
"Anyway, it's time for you to give your dues."
I was confused, but I let him talk anyway. "I need to permanently end your father's reign," his eyes turned stony for a moment. "And you're my ticket to that. For now, find something to do and come back here within three hours."
Right. That was what this was about anyway - at the end of the day, I was nothing but my father's daughter. Without being told, I got up and started to make the bed. I was starting to get better at it as time went by but I still wasn't good at it. I could feel Yunho's eyes follow my every move and it was slightly uncomfortable but nothing unmanageable.
"Get out, Y/N," he said without sparing me another glance.
This is where it gets tricky, my first instinct was to always go to the gardens, but the moment I stepped in, everybody literally glared at me. "No shame at all, princess?" People would snort at me.
Same with the kitchen and all the other sections I can think of. Without any other choice, I decided to walk my way towards a place I've been putting off for a while. I just hope that the person I'm looking for was there. I took a deep breath before knocking on the wooden infirmary wooden door. Luckily for me, Yeosang was there, but so was another person.
"Y/N? Are you hurting somewhere?" Yeosang frowned as he slowly made his way towards me.
I smiled. He was genuinely thoughtful towards me and I couldn't help but like him. "No, he sent me to do stuff but..."
He nodded his head in understanding. "How long do you have?"
"A couple of hours, I-I just, uhm..."
Yeosang quickly held my shoulders and led me to sit on his station. "Don't worry, I'll find something. He was just leaving," he gestured to the man he was with. "By the way, this Kim Hongjoong, he was visiting from Wonderland. Hongjoong, this is..."
That name sounded extremely familiar. I was pretty sure my father had mentioned it once or twice.
Sensing Yeosang's hesitation, Hongjoong cleared his throat. "I know," he shook his head. "It's quite a shame, I know why he's imprisoning you and I get it."
He sighed. "But you are not your father. The princess of Aurora has no business being here."
My heart fluttered, but I couldn't relish the feeling. The fact of the matter is, I was here and nothing I could do was able to change anything. "I-I appreciate it," I gave him a tight smile.
Hongjoong patted my shoulders. "To suffer is to find meaning in the suffering. Be strong." He walked out to leave. I frowned, his voice sounded awfully familiar too - the tone, the diction. I let it slide for now and focused on today's agenda. Yeosang was nice enough to let me clean around even though I didn't need to. It was embarrassing, he had to teach me how to do them. Soon enough, hours passed and I had to go back. "Thank you very much for helping me out," I bowed. "I-I don't want you to get in trouble for being associated with me."
"Don't worry," Yeosang brushed off. "Here, give this to him when you go back so he's in a good mood."
He handed me a scroll that was carefully held together by a thin thread. "This is just intel. Political stuff."
After saying more thanks and more promises that I'll go back to either him or San for more work, I waved him goodbye and went back to Yunho. "Right on time, Y/N. Well done," the latter praised without even bothering to look up from his work. I frowned, has he been working the entire time I was gone to do some duties? I stood directly in front of his table and he didn't notice at first. "What's that?"
He was referring to the scroll. I gave it to him and he proceeded to read it. I couldn't even tell if it was good news or not, he always wore no expression on his face. "Mingi," Yunho called. The said man entered the room shortly and waited patiently. "Summon the Second Prince and the Grand Duke."
"S-Should I go to my chambers, Sir?" I stammered, my heart in my throat, when Mingi had left.
"No," he glanced at me once. "It shouldn't take long."
Minutes later, Prince Jongho came in with Wooyoung in tow. It was odd and I couldn't help but hold my breath as I stepped back to give them space. Yunho had never, ever let me stay before when he had to discuss anything involving the kingdom and right now, I didn't even know what to do.
"Well?" Yunho asked impatiently when nobody said a single word.
"Brother," Jongho stared at me pointedly. I cowered, his glare had the same quality that Yunho has, except his was deadlier. "Do you wish to proceed with her in the room?"
I sighed softly, between the two of them, the Second had always been more vocal about his hatred towards me, so this comes as no surprise anyway. "Why not? This has everything to do with her, no?" Yunho leaned over and looked at his brother with a challenge. "Or do you just have a habit of contradicting me every chance you get, Jongho?"
I know that look, and I hated it. It was rhetorical; he was waiting for you to fail so he could strike. It was what made him more terrifying than his brother or anyone else, for that matter. "You know that's not what I mean," Jongho gritted his teeth. "Her father---"
"I know who her father is," Yunho banged the table loudly with his fist, the sound of it making me jump up slightly. The silence in the room was deafening, even Wooyoung who was usually the one who deescalated everything didn't utter a single word.
"You should have been King, Jongho," Yunho smirked sarcastically, the veins on his neck almost popping in anger. "Having said that, my prisoner is perfectly capable of shutting her mouth. Come here, Y/N."
I was a deer in headlights. Why was he asking me to come over? I had no time to wonder, my feet had a mind of their own and started walking towards the King. I lowered my head when Jongho's glaring eyes followed my every move until I was directly in front of Yunho. "Sit down," he commanded. I was confused and looked around helplessly until Yunho shook his head and pointed at his lap. "Here."
My eyes widened and my face began to heat up wildly at the suggestion. He was such an enigma to me - one moment he would be this close to actually ending my life, and the other he would do things that confused my heart. I was used to his humiliation and unfortunately, everyone else was also used to Yunho doing so. It wouldn't be the first time in front of Wooyoung, but it would be in front of Jongho. I sat gingerly on Yunho's thigh, my cheeks reddening gradually in an intimate position.
"See?" Yunho mocked as he snaked his arm around my waist. "She's such a good girl."
Both Wooyoung and Jongho's face wore an initial shock and they turned their heads to avoid looking at me and the King. I know why he was doing this - it was to show that I do whatever it is that is told of me, no matter how humiliating and degrading it was. This was how he was. He had no problem dehumanizing me. I just had no idea how far he'd go sometimes. What's more is that it was also to keep everyone in check. Right now, Wooyoung and Jongho looked extremely uncomfortable.
I yelped when Yunho lifted my waist a little to position me properly on his lap and my buttocks was directly above his nether regions. My breath kept hitching at every single move and I could have sworn I stopped breathing when he leaned my back towards his chest, the heat of him directly seeping onto me. "Proceed," he commanded. It was one word, yet it held so much weight. I shuddered when his warm breath tickled my skin. He chuckled softly.
The hesitation was clear on Wooyoung's face, but he cleared his throat and proceed to the talk about all the affairs, specifically about Aurora, and alternated speaking with Jongho. They were still uncomfortable, but I could tell they were ignoring what was happening just so they could get out of the room quickly. "You're going to be good and stay still, right?" Yunho whispered on my ear low enough so only I could hear.
I squirmed and tried to turn away but his dark eyes held me captive. I nodded slightly and he gave me a lazy smirk. A zing of pleasure shot through me, I have never seen Yunho's face do anything other than frown or scowl.
"Tell me all of the infrastructural damage and the cost," Yunho stated, his lips getting dangerously close to my neck.
"Right away," Jongho grumbled, clearly displeased at the scene unfolding before him, and began to recite everything.
I couldn't concentrate on any of what they were talking about, my heart was about to leap out of my chest and I was afraid that I couldn't catch it. I bit my lip hard when he leaned in and placed his lips on my neck. Something stirred inside of me as his mouth moved slowly and surely as if he had done this before. I made eye contact with Wooyoung but he just turned away, his face holding extreme discomfort. I gripped my dress tightly in my hands when I felt him lightly suck on a certain part of my skin and wetness pooled down my core. It was an unexplainable feeling and I wasn't sure if I liked it or not. I let out a tiny whimper and everybody freezes. Yunho pulls away and I shut my eyes in pure embarrassment.
"Get out," Yunho growled lowly. It was all Jongho and Wooyoung needed. They both ran out of the room in record time as if something terrible was chasing them down. Yunho took one good look at me and demanded. "Get on the bed, Y/N."
Shivers worked down my spine as I quickly got off him and climbed towards the bed. Soon enough, the bed dipped down and then his body blanketed over me. He suddenly grabbed my hair and my eyes automatically swelled with hot tears. But I felt no fear. I didn't understand what I was feeling, but it wasn't fear.
And then we were kissing. Or rather, he was claiming my lips. That one lesson I had with Wooyoung did nothing to prepare me with his onslaught. Yunho was rough, there was no emotion behind the gesture. His goal was to take what he wants without giving me anything in return.
"You can do better than this," he murmured, my bottom lips between his.
Tears filled my eyes, but my heart soared. I was so confused about what I was feeling and it was making me extremely emotional. I felt my head grow weary with the realization of what I was feeling, though I wasn't too sure. That 'lesson' with Wooyoung did nothing to prepare me for this. I let out a small moan when his tongue started to play with mine, much to my shame and helplessness. There was not any sound or grunt from him.
And then he just stopped. He leaned his forehead on mine and I breathed his scent in. It was a mistake because I knew I would look for it from now on and I can't just get it when I wanted - no, needed - it. He got off and laid down next to me, his eyes watching me, and I watching him in return.
"You are my prisoner and you should never forget that," he rasped. My heart was in my throat and I was about to apologize, when he continued. "But today, I'm going to pretend you are not."
I was too sleepy to comprehend anything, my body was slowly giving out because it was like Yunho sucked my soul out of me with his onslaught. I realized that he, too, looked worn out. I wanted to say something, anything, but the fatigue was slowly catching up to me.
"Sleep," he whispered. As I slowly fell into a slumber, I felt an arm pull me closer to a warm body. Yunho felt warm, I needed his warmth. I craved it, and I don't understand why.
"These are actually beautiful, you did a great job," San smiled as I led him through the garden and showed him the strip of flowers I planted. "You have talent for this, Y/N."
"Thank you," I giggled daintily. "It's all because of you I was able to work in the gardens."
It's been closer to a year now ever since Aurora had been conquered and I was imprisoned as collateral. Lately, I've been working mostly in the royal gardens after the old caretaker had passed away. Most of the servants did not understand the language of flowers so I took it upon myself to take over. Well, San pulled a few strings.
"I have to get going now," San sighed. "The King sent me to Wonderland for some business, I'm afraid you won't be able to see me for a couple of months."
I nodded in understanding. "Take care. Would you please kindly tell Kim Hongjoong my greetings?"
I don't see Hongjoong a lot but he does come visit often. I've yet to figure out how I knew him from before, I still haven't figured it out, but he's been a wonderful company; very different from all the hate I've been receiving.
"Oof!"
I groaned in surprise when a child no older than four stumbled onto the ground, but not before accidentally hitting my legs. I quickly got down on my knees and helped the poor child. "Are you okay?" I asked worriedly and dusted off the dirt from her clothes.
"I-I'm lost, I can't find my mommy," the little child's lips quivered as small tears fell from her chubby cheeks.
"You poor thing," I cooed. "Come, why don't we look for your mommy?"
I quickly held the little girl's small hands into mine as we ventured off. The royal garden was vast, it took me a while to get used to it too and got lost on multiple occasions as well. I took her to the exit where all the servants gathered, and sure enough, one particular woman was frantically running around and asking people if they had seen a child wander off that was no older than four years old. When she saw me, her face went pale as a ghost even as her child slowly ran off to her mother's embrace. She quickly ran to me and bowed repeatedly, leaving me aghast.
"I'm so sorry about my child, Aurorean princess!" the mother cried out. "Please don't punish us!"
It was as if my chest had been hit with something heavy. It hurt to see that my father had left these people with long lasting impressions of trauma that they were not able to leave behind so easily. I felt a sense of remorse, even though I knew that none of this was my fault. "It's Y/N," I offered her a small, tight smile. "I am no longer a princess. Your child got lost and I was hoping we'd find you here."
Her mouth dropped open in disbelief and apprehension filled her expression. I can't say I blame her, but it never meant that none of this hurt. I bent down eye level to the now smiling child as she held onto her mother's dress. "Here, take it," I gave her a pink rose. "I really like this flower, can you keep it safe for me?"
The child happily accepted the rose and I bowed slightly to the mother before I walked off. "Good day, miss."
It was odd how one gesture set off everything. As I walked away, I couldn't help but hear the gasps of surprise and all the whispers I heard along the way.
"That's her, right? That prisoner princess?"
"I thought for sure she was going to punish everyone here!"
"Why is she not acting like her bastard father?"
That day set off something I never, ever expected when I first came here. One day, a group of people from the kitchen approached me and asked if I wanted to try and make food for the servants. "Of course," I smiled brightly. I could see the shocked expressions on their faces when I agreed. "Lead the way."
I had the best meal of my life in that kitchen, not because of the food, but because of the company I had. It was interesting, the crazy part was that I helped that child because I wanted to. It started a spiral of events, and soon enough, I was able to walk through the halls with less glares and most acceptance from the servants.
Joy filled my heart every night before I went to bed at the thought of me and most of the servants getting along. I learned their stories, apologized profusely on behalf of my father. I will never get used to their dumbfounded expression, but it was worth it if I gained a companion or two afterwards. It just intensified all the anger and hatred I had against my father. These were innocent people, he had no business killing for his own gain, torture people for more monetary gain. It was sick, and it made my stomach churn at the thought.
Suddenly, in came the Head Knight. Everyone bowed and he did the same. "Y/N," he began. "The King requests for you."
This was another thing I never expected. "You're getting along with everyone pretty well," Mingi stated as we walked along the familiar halls of the palace. "I'm glad."
"I love the people," I said truthfully. "Everyone seems so full of life and full of love, regardless of what everyone has been through."
Mingi gave me a genuine smile. "Now you understand why Yunho is the way he is with this kingdom." He opened the door for me and ushered me to get in. "Thank you very much, Mingi. I will see you around."
"Sit down," Yunho ordered the moment the door was closed.
I did as told and he gave me a scroll and a quill to write with. I looked at him confused until he spoke up. "What's your writing proficiency?"
I hesitated, but he most likely knew the answer already. He just needed to hear it from me. "I can rival scholars, My King."
He hummed, satisfied. He handed me a couple of books. "These are both about Dune and Aurora," he explained. "Find common ground and write them so I can compare them with each other. Questions?"
"No," I shook my head. "Thank you for the opportunity, Sir..."
He didn't respond and I didn't know what to say anyway so I kept my mouth shut. I began reading and scribbling what I could, slower than I thought since I haven't done anything academic in over a year by now. We worked in silence, and it was much appreciated since there were some things I had to translate, but I tried my best to concentrate and put a lot of effort into every word I did.
He was a good and wise king, he did what was best for his people and it was what my father hated about him the most. It had become a habit for me the more Yunho had summoned me to do more writing.
"For what do I have a prisoner for if you're not going to do some actual work in here?" Yunho would always bite back whenever I always asked him why. He was an intelligent man, I'd come to figure out. He was very eloquent with his writing, very meticulous and well-versed. Not to mention that my heart would always skip a beat whenever I glanced at him while he wrote some more.
"Sorry to bother, Sir, but I don't know what this means," I frowned as I lifted up the manuscript.
"Let me see," Yunho beckoned me over with a wave of a hand. He took one look at it. "Those are symbols of an old language. You need another source to translate."
It had become a favourite activity of mine and I always looked forward to it everyday. There were no words between us, no mockery, no harsh words, and I wasn't a prisoner even for a minute. "This isn't right," I mumbled a little louder than I thought. I covered my mouth when I realized what I did, but it was too late. Yunho was already staring at me.
"What isn't?"
I blushed in embarrassment and the sudden attention. "Your Highness, I-I just translated something really awful in my point of view." He urged me to continue. "The suffering of the common people," I gulped. "A transliteration of how."
He stared at me for a moment. I couldn't read his expression so I wasn't sure if he was angry or not. "And what about it?"
"The monarchy is meant for the people, for the people. What would be their other purpose? I-I understand that they're there for order, but why are the people still suffering?"
Yunho stared at me with a demeanor I couldn't read, but then again, he was never an open book. Or at least, not yet. I held his eye contact, unblinking. He breaks it, nodding painfully slow. He sighed. "The rules aren’t run by us. This world was built on hate and has always been morally bankrupt," Yunho explained. "If it was the opposite, you wouldn't be here."
It was such a morbid point of view yet it was so realistic. He hummed. "And you with the righteous mind. There were many before you, yet the natural evil that is human nature slowly takes over. What makes you so different?"
There was so much to admire about this man yet I don't know where to begin. His words were always this force that always made me want to listen to him - he was that compelling. The fact that he was aware of the vulnerability of the world was so compassionate, but I knew it was born from the suffering that was my father.
No other words need be spoken. I resumed working on whatever Yunho gave me, concentrating on the work because deep inside, I wanted to please him. I didn't let anything disturb me, not the taunts of some nobles coming in and out, not Seonghwa commenting in surprise on how pretty my handwriting was, and not even when I was told to stop. I gave Yunho the scroll I filled out so he could inspect it. My hands were aching by the time I was done, but it was absolutely worth it.
He stared at me intensely and I couldn't help but flush under his gaze. "Come here," he commanded softly. I did as told. "Would you like to stop writing or do you wish to continue?" Yunho asked. His eyes said everything, he was waiting for me to say no.
"I would like to continue if it's okay, My King," I answered. Yunho nodded. His usual expression of disdain was nowhere to be seen and there was something in his eyes - tenderness. He sat up and lowered my body a little and I closed my eyes out of reflex, but mostly because I was scared I'd do something I'd regret if I looked at him.
"Good," Yunho I heard him say. And then, he kissed my forehead softly. Butterflies flipped my stomach upside down. I could hardly believe what was happening. I expected a lot from Jeong Yunho, but certainly not this. His lips lingered and I savoured the feeling. It was worth it. "T-Thank you, Sir," I stammered.
"Continue writing," Yunho pulled away as if nothing had happened. But I couldn't concentrate on anything after.
I still felt his lips on my skin and the very thought of it jumbled my mind into a frenzy. It went on like that until late at night. I felt my body giving up and a small yawn escaped from my lips. My eyes kept closing in on me but I caught myself before they fully closed for the night. I could feel Yunho's eyes on me and I was concerned if he was going to say anything, but he kept on watching. I decided to let my head rest a bit and leaned on the table. It was a mistake, all the exhaustion came crawling onto me and sleep went in and out of my system.
"Who's out there?" I heard Yunho's voice call out.
I heard the door creak open and close but the sleepiness had rendered my body weak. "Yun?" a voice answered back. I knew it was Seonghwa again. It was fascinating, everybody dropped the honorifics when they thought nobody was around to listen.
"Carry her to bed."
I felt myself being carried and I welcomed the warmth Seonghwa had provided me. He started walking, but Yunho's voice sounded again. "Not her bed, Hwa. Mine."
"Oh?" Seonghwa was confused, but he did as told anyway. He laid me down on the familiar bed and I automatically inhaled the scent the sheets had to offer me. "Good enough?"
"You may leave."
There it was, the stony edge on his voice. It was what I was used to. But it was like the universe had other plans for both of us. I felt the bed dip and Yunho's voice would be the last thing I heard before I completely fell asleep. "I should have killed you a long time ago before you started messing with my head."
It was, without a doubt, the most peaceful sleep I have ever had in my entire twenty-three years of living. When I woke up the next day, I felt myself being shaken awake. At first, I thought it was Yunho finally getting sick of my insolence and kicking me out but, instead, two familiar faces met my eyes.
"Yeosang?" I sat up so quickly that I started to get a migraine. "Hongjoong? What are you guys doing?"
I was about to rub the sleep off my eyes but I frowned when I realized that my hands were bandaged. I looked at Yeosang in affection. A thought suddenly passed me and I turned to Hongjoong. "Does this mean San is back if you're here?"
"Of course," Hongjoong smiled. He paused for a bit. "I told him not to come here. I...wanted to talk to you about something. I'll make it quick before my nephew comes back."
My brows rise in confusion and a bit of paranoia. "I-I'm just a prisoner, there's nothing I could help you with," I nervously said. "Do I know your nephew?"
Hongjoong and Yeosang look at each other. "You don't know?" Yeosang asked in disbelief. I shook my head, thoroughly confused now. I took a good look at Hongjoong and that sense of familiarity comes back to me. I realized that he looks slightly familiar, too.
"Your King is my nephew," Hongjoong began to explain. "The former king, Yunho and Jongho's father, was my eldest brother. We had different mothers, however. My father had me late because of his...peculiar hobbies."
My mind began to shut down, and perhaps it was the shock. Now I know who this man was and why he's so familiar. I quickly stood up from the bed and bowed low at Hongjoong repeatedly and in panic. "Forgive my insolence, Your Majesty of Wonderland! I am terribly---"
Hongjoong - or rather, the honourable ruler of Wonderland - chuckled and urged me to sit back down on the bed. "I'm not like that. Plus, I owe you something, do you recall?"
I nodded at him and then slightly shook my head, signaling that I do remember, but I refuse to talk about it right now. He seemed to take the hint and quickly changed the subject before Yeosang questioned us both. "Right, now that's settled," he cleared his throat. "I'll be straight with you, you don't belong here, so I'm going to get you out of here."
You could hear a pin drop with how silent the room had become. Did I hear him correctly? "I-I'm sorry?"
"Yeo, go watch out for that brat," Hongjoong cocks his head towards the door. Yeosang took the hint and left.
"Please tone it down," I yelped. "I-I don't want you to get punished..."
Hongjoong blinked at me before laughing. "Don't worry, Yunho won't do anything. He can try. Your concern is appreciated though."
I frowned, unconvinced. For the whole year I've been with Yunho, I could tell that he will retaliate if anybody crosses him. He is very patient yet he has a short fuse. His unpredictability scares me sometimes. "You've been here for a year?" he asked. I nodded. "Yet that air of royalty never left you. When I first saw you here, I thought you were visiting as a princess. Imagine my surprise when I was told you were a prisoner of war."
"I don't understand," I frowned.
"Being royalty doesn't stop at status," Hongjoong softly said. "It's the way you talk, the way you walk, the way you move. Your blood never lies."
He paused. "You need to go back to Aurora. You're the only hope we have at this point."
My eyes widened at what he was trying to tell me. "B-But doesn't Dune own Aurora?"
"Yes and no," he explained. "Thun about it, why hasn't Yunho transitioned Aurora over to Dune? Aurora is about half a day away by horse carriage, it's not that far. You know the man he is, Y/N. When he wants something done, it will happen no matter how long it takes."
Hongjoong hit the nail on the coffin. I've been thinking about this for a while now but I was too afraid to bring it up to anyone.
"But he will do it," I sighed. "I've been working with him for a while now, there's official paperwork that says so."
"Which is why you have to go before that happens," he convinced, and by God, he is very good at it. "Please, Y/N, you are the queen Aurora needs to finish this damn war---"
"How?" I couldn't help but raise my voice. "Yunho owns me, don't you see it?"
"It's what I don't see," Hongjoong raised a brow. "He doesn't fully own you. You have no slave marking on."
I froze. I wanted to tell him that I didn't mean it that way and Yunho owns me in another sort of bind, but I keep my mouth shut. Of all the people in this world, I was the most aware of the slave collar. My father made everyone wear it. "Aren't you tired of this cycle, princess?" Hongjoong was getting agitated. "This imprisonment bullshit, it's a never ending cycle that won't stop until somebody steps up."
"But why me?" I exasperatedly question.
"Why not you?" Hongjoong retorted. "I am only one king, Y/N, and I cannot do this alone. I hate to bring this up, but the damage your father had inflicted, don't you want to stop it?"
I scoffed before I could stop myself. "Stop manipulating me."
Hongjoong smirked. "You see that sass and observation, Y/N? Imprisonment will never erase the royalty in you. All I want is simple, so as everyone who has suffered for so long," he practically begged. "You have my word that nobody will hurt you, all we want is for you to go back to Aurora and undo everything that's happened."
I narrowed my eyes on him. "We?"
A smirk threatens to spill from his lips but he covers it by clearing his throat. "Yes," he said. "There's people who want peace, and we're working towards it, but we need your cooperation."
I bit my lip, deep in thought. Well, that certainly changes things. "Do you have any idea what's going on with Aurora right now?" I asked, dreading the answer.
Hongjoong heaved a weighted sigh. "They need a permanent ruler," he whispered. "My people and yours have always worked in harmony. What your father did does not constitute Auroreans as a whole. They deserve peace too, you know that."
My heart sank. He didn't want to say it out loud, but he was basically saying that Aurora is currently in a state of disarray. A trickle of shame drops onto my soul. I got so used to being here that I fully accepted the fate handed to me. What happened to the strong Y/N who swore to always fight for what was right? Hongjoong only stared at me as I went through all the stages of grief and hesitation. So, escape, take over Aurora as its rightful ruler, and make peace with Dune. Simple, right?
Wrong. Yunho would kill me first.
"C-Can I think about it, at least?" I looked up at Hongjoong. "This is a little too much for me to take in right now..."
He nodded. "Of course, this is too sudden. I'm so sorry for bringing all of this upon you, princess. I really am."
"How would I tell you?" I followed Hongjoong as he went to the door.
He put a hand on my shoulder and smiled. "You'll know how to eventually."
I stood by the door for a lot longer than I intended to when Hongjoong had already left. I wanted to tell him, I really did, but how was I supposed to tell him that my hesitation is from my unwillingness to actually leave? I've grown attached to the people here, but the most dreadful out of them all, my want to serve and please Yunho has been growing by the minute.
On the other hand, my people back home are waiting for me. They were the people I lived for even after my imprisonment. Hongjoong's point was impossible to ignore - this cycle between wars and this never ending hate against one another has to stop. Suddenly, the room was suffocating. I decided to step out and walk around for fresh air. It was something I did when I needed to think.
I should get an opinion, but I didn't know who to ask, though. I didn't want to bother Yeosang anymore, San would be okay but I bet he's tired from his journey, Seonghwa would raise a brow at my insolence and Wooyoung might behead me. Mingi's a no-go since he's always with Yunho.I sighed, it looks like I have to Yeosang or San one more time. As I walked further and further, I realized that I had mistakenly gone into the forest-y area. I'd never ventured this far and now I was upset that I was lost.
"Looking for something, princess?"
Warning bells went off my head. That wasn't a familiar voice. I turned around and saw a couple of unknown men that had gathered, and they were all glaring at me. "If the King won't kill you, we will," one of them spat. "How dare you show your face in here after everything we've been through?!"
My heart pounded at the danger I was in. I knew there would still be people who despised me, but it still hurt to hear.
"Get her!"
Before I could do anything, two men grabbed my arms and started to drag me out in the open. "W-Wait, unhand me!"
My breathing turned from heaving to full on hyperventilation. Before I could scream, a rag was put in my mouth to gag me and my screams afterwards were swallowed into nothing. My insides quivered in fear when I was pushed down harshly, though I tried not to get intimidated. I groaned when my hair was grabbed and tugged roughly. "I can't wait to carve your face," one of the men hissed directly on my face. "You look so much like your father, it pisses me off."
The fire in my soul died at that very instant. Was this truly the end for me?
"Get down on your knees to beg and maybe we won't hurt you," one of them propositioned. Everyone laughed out loud at that statement. It was at the moment that my resolve hardened - there was no way I was going to sell my dignity, or what's little of it, right here. When they realized that I wasn't going to move, all hell broke loose. "You fucking bitch, come here!"
My eyes widened when I saw a glint of something metallic in the air, but it was too late. The pain was out of this world, never in my life would I have imagined that the very first time I'd see a dagger up closer was when it was digging into my skin. "Help, please!" I screamed momentarily when I spit the gag out.
They were taking turns carving my body up, until I just became numb to it. They got angrier when my scream stopped. Even Yunho wasn't this cruel.
Suddenly, a figure showed up at the very far end of the clearing. It was Prince Jongho. His face paled and his expression was aghast. I knew from that far it was obvious what was happening. And then, he just left. I smiled bitterly despite the pain. I don't even blame him because my father killed his brother in front of him. His hatred for me knows now bounds.
"What the fuck are you savages doing?! Stop what you're doing!"
Everything stopped in that moment as I felt the light slowly slipping away from my world. No, I knew I wasn't dying, it was perhaps my body shutting down due to extreme pain and trauma. I looked up to see everyone staring at none other than Wooyoung, another person who hated me with extreme intensity. Had he actually stopped these people from hurting me? I didn't understand. He marched over but a voice stopped him from moving.
"You're supposed to be knights, you motherfuckers, stand down!" Mingi's deep, angry voice boomed all throughout the clearing. His furious strides quickly reached us. I have never seen him this angry and it terrified me.
"My Prince, what are you doing here?" I heard Wooyoung's soft voice
"What do you think?" Jongho snapped. "I'm the one who called Mingi, I had to get Yunho too, fuck, he's going to get so pissed..."
So Jongho didn't leave after all. These three were the ones who hated me the most, and now they were here at my weakest moment. Mingi's angry voice was so loud that it attracted attention from other people. "You incredible fuckers, you know what I'm going to do to you all?!" he screamed. "Stick my fucking feet up your asses and walk around like you're flip-flops! Knights!"
A couple of other knights came in and detained the perpetrators aside. I tried to keep my eyes open and they were open enough for me to see what was going on. "Goddamn it," Wooyoung hissed as he helped me sit down. "I'll have to stay here and wait for Yunho."
Mingi stepped up and began to take me in his arms. "I'll take her out of here," he murmured. And then, he was carrying me. While everybody was distracted, I saw one of the men about to throw a dagger at me and Mingi's direction. A shot of adrenaline burst through me and I shouted, "Watch out!"
A look of panic crosses Mingi's face and he had no time to avoid it. But the knife didn't hit us. This was reminiscent of a theatre play with how things were turning up. Everybody pales and for a moment, everything goes silent. I was able to fully internalize everything. I realized I was bleeding profusely and so was Mingi and Wooyoung since they touched me, and that there was another presence.
Yunho heaved an irritated sigh as he stared at his bleeding hand, the one he used to catch the dagger. He turned to me, his face holding no expression. He hands me the dagger. “Kill them," he instructed. Everyone's breath hitched as they waited for my decision.
My mind was a whirlwind of overwhelming emotions. "I-I can't," I wheezed out.
Yunho raised a brow in amusement. "Justice isn't always merciful," he said. "They would kill you in a heartbeat."
I shook my head, the little movement making me dizzy. "That's n-not what I meant," I whispered hoarsely. "Y-You do it. Take the lead and reign over me, Yunho."
He nodded slowly. "Take them to the adjoining room of my office," he instructed Wooyoung. They share a knowing look and Wooyoung walks away. Yunho turned back to Mingi. “My chambers."
I closed my eyes and let myself lay limp in Mingi's arms. Every move hurt no matter how careful he was, but I dare not complain. It certainly caught the attention of some people and I could hear gasps and barely contained anger at my condition. By this, I could hear Yeosang panicking and running off to get his medicinal supply ready. I cracked my eyes open for a little and was not surprised by the amount of people already staring at us. I was just in time to see familiar faces, too.
"What the hell is all this commotion?" Seonghwa was aggravated when he went to the front. He took one good look at me and the blood from his face drained. "Oh, God..."
I was so embarrassed to be seen this way - weak, vulnerable, and helpless. When we entered the chambers, Hongjoong was there waiting. He looked like he was about to say something to Yunho and then he saw me being laid down on the bed. "What happened?" he asked. I don't care who filled him in and he sighed in understanding when he was fully informed.
"Alright everybody, get out unless you're going to volunteer to help out," Yeosang announced before sitting on the side of the bed.
"What do you want me to do?" Seonghwa rolled his sleeves up and sat down next to Yeosang as Hongjoong left to go to the room next to Yunho's office. I was so surprised, he had always been impartial towards me. And speaking of Yunho, he was just leaning by the door, silently watching as his eyes took everything that was happening. I was fine with that, I didn't need to hear him scolding me. Or was I afraid of his disappointment?
"Okay, so it seems that the damages were done mostly to her arms," Yeosang murmured. "Hold them up so I can clean them up."
Seonghwa does as told. I bit my lip harshly as tears fell from my eyes at the sting from the herbs being used to disinfect my wounds.
"Wait a minute," Mingi suddenly murmured, his brows scrunching up as he looked closer at my arm. "There's a pattern, letters---oh my god."
"What?" Seonghwa takes a look and his mouth hangs. It's rare for him to lose composure. He turns around to look behind him. "Yunho..."
Yunho stared at my arm for a solid minute before he turned around and went into the room where Hongjoong was, but he left the door ajar a bit. Loud voices can be heard from the inside. My heart lurched to my throat. I pulled my arm to try and see, but Seonghwa gently grabbed my chin and tilted it up while he shook his head. "Don't look," he said softly. "For your own sake."
"I-It's bad, isn't it?" I croaked.
Yeosang held my hand and squeezed it. "By the time we're done, it will be gone, okay? I have methods to heal without leaving scars, don't you worry."
"You son of a bitch, what makes us different?!"
We all stared at the direction of all the arguments that were slowly becoming louder and louder. It was Hongjoong, and he was furious.
"B-But, her father was a monster---"
"Save it."
The hard edge on that voice surprised me, for this person has nothing but sweet and accommodating to me. It was San.
"I feel bad for those assholes," Yeosang laughed sarcastically to lift my mood up. "San is a little more unforgiving when angry."
"You ought to be ashamed of yourselves!" Hongjoong hissed. "She's the last person you should've done this too, I am extremely disappointed with all of you!" My breath hitched, I sighed, bracing for what's next because I know exactly what he's going to say.
"During captivity, that princess you hate? She would feed everybody, teach everyone to survive after escape, cover for anyone so they wouldn't be punished. She was going against her father!"
Seonghwa, Yeosang, and Mingi all whipped their heads towards me. I closed my eyes to avoid them.
"You know what else?" Hongjoong chuckled darkly. "She gambled her life to help me escape when I was captured without knowing who I was. Hell, she didn't even remember who I was when she first saw me here.".
"But it doesn't erase anything that happened before, oh forgive our insolence, Your Majesty!"
Another round of arguments could be heard and Yeosang finally wrapped my arms, but not before I saw what they had carved on my skin - disgrace.
"That's enough."
There it was, the voice that always made me want to drop on my knees. There was a tense silence. "I killed the Aurorean King so we could be at peace," Yunho started. "I understand why you did it, but she is mine, and mine alone.”
I was startled and jumped a bit when the door opened to reveal Yunho. We made eye contact before he spoke. "It brings me deep sadness that all of you resorted to this brutality," he spoke, the weight of his words heavy. "We've all been through so much, but the day I see the monster the Aurorean King was in any of you, is the day I let all of you go. All of you, get out."
He turned to this room and spoke to no one in particular. "All of you as well, out."
And then it was just me and Yunho in the room, staring at each other intently. "M-My King," I whimpered at his sharp gaze. He raised a brow. "You had no problem calling me by name earlier," he made his way towards the bed. "Don't do it again."
I vaguely remember doing it and I had no idea why I even did it. His air of authority blanketed me as he got closer and closer until he was sitting on the bed. He didn't say anything for a while. "Never forget who you are," he said curtly and firmly. "The world will try you, it will grind you down until you are no more."
I stared at him and saw him in a different light for the first time. He wasn't a royalty, a king, and my captor - he was just Jeong Yunho. Tears started to collect in my eyes. I tried to turn away but Yunho grabbed my chin and tilted it to his face. "The scars will fade," he murmured. "Mine did."
Yunho pulled me onto his body and wrapped an arm around me. Something broke in me and it covered the shock I felt, I just burst right there and then. His other hand patted my back as sobs racked my entire body. It hurt, everything hurt. I've always imagined what it would be like to be in his arms. It was unfortunate that it had to be this way, but it didn't stop me from clutching his shirt and crying miserably. "You're very cold," I muttered in between tears.
"Am I cold or maybe you just don't deserve my warmth?"
"Forgive my i-insolence, Your Majesty."
"Sometimes, when people don't get what they want, they can’t stand the thought of limitations," Yunho sighed.
After a while, I recovered. I spent a lot of my time either in my room to be alone or Yunho's. He would give me a book to read so I could pass the time and it confused my heart so much. But after that, I haven't seen him much. His workload caught up with him and lately, I've been all alone either organizing what he asked me to or simply just basking in the gardens where all the servants spent time with me.
It made me happy that everyone had become warm towards me and was even angry at the knights that had hurt me, but I couldn't help but miss the time I spent with Yunho, even if all he did was glare or snarl at me. Right now, I was at Yeosang's clinic so could check up on me.
"Thank you, Sangie, you're always there for me," I smiled gratefully at him.
He stares at me a bit confused. "Uhm, yeah, no problem, but I'm not the one you should thank the most," he frowned. "Yunho would have beheaded me."
"W-What do you mean?" I asked, my heart beating uncontrollably hard.
"He was the one that kept sending me to you whenever you were injured," he shrugged. "You didn't know?"
My heart palpitated and my stomach did somersaults. Does this mean that he's not going to kill me anymore? "By the way," Yeosang interrupted my darkening thoughts. He dug through his arsenal and brought out an envelope. "This is about your escape."
I sat up straighter in attention. "From Hongjoong?"
Yeosang shook his head. "No, from our head."
"Head?" I titled my head in curiosity. "What does that mean?"
"It means that we take orders from someone higher than us," Yeosang chuckled. "Someone wants you out of here more than us. Now, run along. I have to tend to the King."
I froze and I felt my throat tighten up again. "W-Why? Is anything wrong with him?" Yeosang blinked at me and grimaced. Something tells me that I wasn't supposed to know, and that he assumed I knew. "Kang Yeosang..."
When he still didn't say a word, I bolted out of the room like my life depended on it. I didn't even turn back once. I didn't let it worry me though. The King was an abnormally strong person, so I'm sure he'll be fine. I went to his chambers and unsurprisingly, he wasn't there. I knew he wasn't avoiding me, he didn't care enough for me to do so. I went to my chambers and left the letter in there for now. Suddenly, I heard the familiar sound of the doors opening and closing. Yunho.
I was surprised to see him enter, but I was quickly taken aback by how pale he looked. I tried to stop the fluttering feeling in my stomach at the sight of him because it was the first time I've ever seen him look even remotely sick. When I observed him closer, his breathing was laboured and she seemed to be in great pain. I looked at his bandaged arm and it hit me - his hand was wounded when he caught that dagger!
I completely forgot about that and not once had he got it treated the whole time I was recovering and knowing him, he would never ask for help. My body started moving on its own and I quickly rushed to him and held his arm. I almost pulled away, his skin was burning hot. He was surprised to see me. He stiffened and pulled away from me harshly, glaring at me angrily. "What the hell are you doing?" he snarled. "Just because I haven't punished you in a while doesn't mean I won't hesitate to do it again."
"I-I'm so sorry, My King," I apologized instantly.
He didn't say anything and proceeded to sit down on his bed. It was then I realized how sick he was and he was probably burning up with fever. This might be my death sentence but I pushed forward again and held his wounded hand in mine. I frowned, it was definitely infected. "Y/N," he gritted. His tone held a lot of anger.
"Please let me help you," I begged.
"Do you want to die?" he growled through gritted teeth.
I gulped in anxiety. "You can kill me after," I whispered. "Let me help, please..."
He stared at me, unblinking, his eyes penetrating parts of me I had no idea existed before. It made me uncomfortable, but I never broke eye contact to show my sincerity. "One wrong move," he seethed, his voice dropping an octave lower. "I will kill you on the spot."
I smiled brightly before I could stop myself. I quickly stood up and bowed repeatedly. "Oh, I won't let you down!" I gasped. "Please lie down, I will fetch some cloth and water for you."
I was happier than I was supposed to be and quickly got to work before Yunho changed his mind. I got slightly cold water and some cloth and went back, but when I did, I was surprised to see that Yunho had fallen asleep on his bed. I quietly approached him and set down the water and cloth to the side and stared at him. I had never seen him asleep before. Whenever we slept on the bed, he was always up before me. He was hauntingly beautiful, something I know I can never have.
I dipped the cloth in the cold water and proceeded to dab it gently on his forehead and all over his exposed skin so he could cool off. When I reached his face, I was careful not to wake him. This was the only opportunity he had to rest and I don't want to disturb him. I went on like that for hours, going back and forth in the bathroom to refill the water so it doesn't go too warm. But it was no use. He was still burning up. Without hesitation, I undid the buttons on his shirt and dabbed it gently with the cloth as well. He would probably punish me for this when he awoke, but I could care less.
My heart dropped when I stared at his bare chest. The branding scar was there, but besides the few battle scars on him, his skin was otherwise smooth and toned. I set it aside for now, and focused on making him feel better, even though I knew that he wasn't awake to feel it for now. I leaned down to give the scar a small kiss and set my head down on his chest, just feeling his skin with mine. His heart had a steady rhythm, and tears fell slowly down my eyes and onto his chest.
I love him, I had fallen for him, and it hurt so much. I don't know how it happened or when it even started, but my heart held him in it and the realization made my heart shatter into a million pieces. Yunho wasn't someone I should have had feelings for. He captured me, imprisoned me, and hurt me before, but why do I even feel like this? It would never end well for me, and I knew he would break my heart. He was the king, and he harboured hatred for my father so intense that even my life wasn't enough to pay for it.
I jolted away and wiped my tears quickly when I heard Yunho groan and then he moved ever so slightly. He sat down and stared at me. Then, he looked down at his open shirt and quickly buttoned them up. He looked back at me and sighed. "What is it about you, Y/N?"
I stared at him, blinking repeatedly. "Whatever do you mean, My King?"
He crossed his arms. "I can't figure out if your demon father raised an angel, or if he raised a demon pretending to be an angel?"
The question surprised me and I looked away. "Y-You're awake, Your Grace..."
He smirked at my obvious attempt to change the topic. "Yes. Why? You want me dead?"
My eyes widened at the implication and I shook my head adamantly. "No! I-I don't!"
He shrugged and leaned back. "I'm surprised you didn't strike," he smirked. "Your cowardly father had a habit of killing people in their sleep."
"I won't ever hurt you, Sire."
Then silence, except for the loud beating of my heart - the heart that beat only for him. Yunho stared at me, and stared hard. I was nervous, is he going to punish me for touching him? "Come here," he said softly.
One second I was sitting on the edge of the end, and the next, I was in Yunho's arms, his body caging me in his warmth. I closed my eyes, everything felt so right at this moment. I couldn't even be surprised. I was so happy, but did the happiness outweigh the pain? My faith was walking on broken glass.
A surge of courage came over me and I buried my face on his chest. It didn't matter right now, or if he changed his mind, but right now, all I cared about was this moment between us. It was something I would never get to experience anymore because he won't be, hopefully, sick again for the longest time after this. Good moments were hard to come by as a prisoner, so I will imprint this memory in my heart.
"For the longest time now, I've had this question that's boggling my head," he whispered. "Who do you take after, if not your father?"
"I-I'm not too sure," I answered truthfully.
I looked up at him and he was already looking at me with those beautiful, but clouded eyes. "How are your arms?"
I was a bit surprised he even asked. "They're getting better, they don't hurt as much as they did a couple of weeks ago."
He nodded but didn't say anything else. "Would you like to sleep?" I asked him apprehensively.
"I just woke up," he raised an annoyed brow at me. "I don't like to sleep, it's when my thoughts haunt me the most."
I wouldn't be surprised. For all the things my father did, I would be surprised if nobody had nightmares. Even the king had some. It made my heart bleed once more. "Those years were the hardest times of everybody's lives," Yunho began to speak, his fingers lazily tracing my arms as he stared at the ceiling, lost in thought.
I didn't even realize that I was holding my breath. This was the first time he'd ever talked to me like this and it felt so good that he was confiding in me. "As a kingdom, we were always trained and prepared for any sort of attack, you should know this. It was difficult when you're powerless against a tyrant, though."
He gave a side eyed glance and I averted my eyes in shame even though it was not my fault. "But no one was prepared for the aftermath. Nobody knew where to begin and how to move on," he recalled softly, unadulterated pain flashing in his eyes. "There was no way to relax, everyone was paranoid that an attack would happen again."
Tears filled my eyes. I felt every pain that he went through even though I had no idea how extensive they were. Is this what it was like to love someone? It was such a curse. "Everyone has changed so much," he sighed deeply. "San used to be bubbly and a generally happy person. Wooyoung used to be mischievous, he was borderline annoying, but everyone loved him for it."
It was difficult to picture both of them in a different manner and it made me even sadder. "Yeosang had this child-like innocence to him that I can never, ever get back. It was hard to accept at first. Seonghwa had always been the way he is, but he was always smiling. Now it's gone."
"And Mingi," he continued. "He was always my biggest regret. He was just a boy. He used to take my punishments for me. He's become so much like me that I regret ever meeting him."
It began to shed light on why the Head Knight had hated me so much back then. My closest maid, Ilri, and I met when we were twelve years old. Yunho and Mingi most likely met that age as well. "The last two went further and further away from me," Yunho chuckled bitterly. "My brother and I used to be close. I don't even recognize Jongho anymore, and same with my uncle. Captivity changed Hongjoong."
He turned to look at me. "Do you know why I'm telling you all of this?"
"No," I answered with a slight shake of my head.
"Do not betray me, Y/N. I'm letting you in a little, don't prove me wrong by stabbing me in the back."
That sharp edge in my gut strengthened, the one that I thought would dull if time passed enough, and it was then I realized that I cannot leave this man. "Would you like to take your belongings in your chambers and move them in here," Yunho asked, though it was more of a statement rather than one.
My eyes widened and I stared at him. "I-Is that okay, Your Highness?"
"I wouldn't say it if it wasn't," he rolled his eyes. "Run along. Do some chores and I'll ask someone to do it."
"Thank you, My King," I bowed to him when I got up from the bed. Everything was too good to be true, that was something I made myself believe as I walked around, lost in thought. My heart hurt from the dilemma. I want to stay with Yunho, even though the best I'll be is to watch from the sides, but at the same time, my people need me - the people of Dune, Wonderland, and the other nations need me.
But even if I did choose to come with Hongjoong, how was I going to start over again? I know nothing about ruling a kingdom, let alone make peace with another kingdom that my own screwed and captured. Tears started falling from my eyes, I have never felt so helpless. Do I choose my happiness or choose the destiny I was always meant to follow?
"Y/N? Are you okay---wait, are you crying?"
The smile from Seonghwa's face disappeared and was replaced with concern. Ever since that day, he's always been very concerned about me. "Did he do anything to you?" he helped me get inside his office.
I shook my head and wiped the tears of my eyes. Of all the people who had to catch me in my feelings, it was Seonghwa. It was so embarrassing for me. "No, but I am very doomed, I am afraid."
He let out a deep sigh. "No offense, but what's worse than Yunho, himself?" Seonghwa deadpanned.
I laughed a bit in between my tears. He and Hongjoong were the only ones who could get away with this. "I'm in love with the King," I blurted out before I backed out. At first, it didn't hit him, but when it did, Seonghwa's eyes widened and he reeled back a little. He was probably expecting something bad, but surely not that one. I wasn't the type to cry. Even he knew I was doomed.
"It's not the end of the world, Y/N, it's okay," he awkwardly tried to cheer me up.
"Yes, but he will end me if he finds out," I frowned deeply. "I'm just a prisoner, and he absolutely abhors my father, and I fell for him anyway! He'll kill me if he finds out."
He handed me a glass of water, which I greedily gulped down. "This isn't the best advice, but in my opinion, the best thing you could possibly do is to set it aside for now."
"Have you ever fallen in love before?" I asked with genuine curiosity.
"Of course," he nodded. "Everybody has at some point, everybody has fallen out of love before, and everybody has been hurt before. It's human nature, Y/N."
“Why aren’t you with your love?” I gave him a questioning look and he hesitated.
“They're dead," Seonghwa smiled bitterly. "Childbirth complications."
I gasped, covering my mouth with my hand. "I-I'm so sorry about that..."
"I couldn't fully hate you, even though I should," he chuckled, shaking his head. "You remind me of my love so, so much."
In the end, I wasn't able to do any sort of chores because Seonghwa refused to let me out with my tear stained face. Suddenly, our peace was broken by a frantic knock on the door. "What's wrong?" Seonghwa asked the knocker, Mingi.
He pushed inside and quickly went to me. "You need to go to Yunho," he panted, his tone gravely. "And you need to go now."
"Hold on," I frowned, my heart thundering against my ribcage. "Why--"
He grabbed my arm and started to pull me. "I have no time to explain, please---"
"Song Mingi, calm down," Seonghwa was irritated. "What is going on?"
"Yunho is going berserk," Mingi growled. Me and Seonghwa looked at each other in surprise. "One minute, he ordered me and Wooyoung to move your stuff, and the next he's a screaming monster set to destroy everything, please you have to go."
A burning pain takes over my entire body and a chill passes over me instantaneously. The world stopped spinning because I had an idea why Yunho was furious. I ran as quickly as I could to Yunho, with Seonghwa and Mingi following, like I was chasing the very last airs of my breath and he was the only one who had it. I prayed as my feet hit the pavement that it wasn't what I thought it was. Destruction met the three of us the moment we entered the room. The furniture was disarray, papers were scattered all over the floor, and an angry King awaited us. When he set his eyes on me, I recoiled from how dark it was.
He took big strides towards me and raised his hand. "Wait, please, do not do it!" Seonghwa screamed while protectively putting me behind him. Yunho threw a piece of paper harshly against our direction and Seonghwa picked it up. Tears started to prick my eyes. I knew it - Yunho had read the letter. I haven't even had the chance to read it.
"Explain," Yunho snapped, his voice tense. He was disheveled, his hair was not fixed for once like he ran his hands over and over again on it and his face was mad with rage. "Explain to me right now or so God help me I will hurt you."
Seonghwa snapped his head at me after he read the letter, his expression of disappointment. "Y/N?" he asked, not wanting to believe anything. "What is this?"
"I can explain---"
"Mingi, call everyone," Yunho snarled. "I need to know who else was planning the great escape of my prisoner."
Mingi was shocked, but he moved nonetheless. "And you," Yunho pointed at me, his voice sounding low and deadly. It sent chills down my spine. "Explain."
I flinched and a tense silence followed. I didn't know what to say. I stared at Yunho, pleading with my eyes, but it was no use. "Say something!" Yunho screamed, banging his hand loudly on his wooden table. Soft cries and whimpers left my mouth. The sight of Yunho broke something inside me. He looked so defeated, so hurt, like a man who had just lost war within himself - like a man betrayed by someone he believed in.
He wasn't just hurt, he was shattered, and it was my fault.
"I-I didn't mean to hurt you, please, I can explain, I really didn't mean to," I begged pathetically for him.
"Then you should have never been born!" Yunho roared loudly, angrily swiping the paperwork in front of him flying, the sheets gradually falling down one by one towards the floor with a swoosh. It was very unnerving. That was the first time I'd ever heard Yunho raise his voice. His eyes were dilated in wild and sheer rage, unleashed without thoughts nor consequences. I will never forget those eyes.
"Let me go!" I shrieked, tripping on my feet when I tried to protest against him, but that only resulted in Yunho dragging me faster and even rougher than before. Suddenly, more footsteps came into the room and more protests resounded.
"Yunho, please, Yunho," I heard the familiar voice of Hongjoong sound. "Stop it, you're hurting her, Yunho!"
My insides contracted and I was left with a heart that exploded in my chest, clammy skin and hyperventilating as I was thrown on the floor. "Shut the fuck up," Yunho snapped, he charged at Hongjoong and gave him a strong punch in the gut. Hongjoong recoiled and coughed out. "You were going to take her away from me?"
If it wasn't for the situation, I would have spent all day thinking about that statement.
"Are you okay?" San's gentle hands helped me up and I leaned helplessly at him while Hongjoong explained to Yunho over and over again why my escape would be beneficial for Dune and everybody. "No," I sobbed loudly. "My heart hurts..."
He looked at me worried. "I will take you to Yeosang---"
"No, not like that. My heart hurts."
San's expression was forlorn when he realized what I was trying to say. "You gave him your heart."
I nodded, but I couldn't even finish my sentence because when I looked back, Yunho was in the process of charging towards Hongjoong. My body moved instinctively and I rushed to him, stopping him by hugging his waist. I yelped when he pushed me harshly. "You whore," he hissed. He pushed me down on my knees so I was kneeling on the floor. "I give you a little bit of kindness and you do this to me? How long have you been planning to stab me in the back?"
I shook my head. "I wasn't going to!"
He scoffed and pulled my hair. He got onto my face directly. "You expect me to believe that? Yunho snarled. "I should have killed you a long, long time ago. I should have branded you and let those dogs carve you up some more."
Something broke inside me, and a fire that was dormant in me sparked awake. I was angry, I had no right to, but I was. "How can you say that?" I growled back. "You're no different from my father if you wish other people to be hurt like you did!"
A moment of pain flashed in Yunho's eyes, but he blinked it away. I shouldn't have said that, but what else can I do? "My only mistake was that I wasn't not be able to cope with your rage, I have always done my best for you," I swallowed thickly, fat tears rolling down my eyes in pain. "If you're going to kill me, then just get it over with."
Is this what Seonghwa meant when he said that love hurts? And speaking of which, Seonghwa, Mingi, Hongjoong, and San were just behind us, just watching, not being able to do anything but just watch the scenes unfold. "Beg me," Yunho pulled my hair harder. "I don't know what I'll do if I don't like what I hear, I swear to God, Y/N."
I shook my head defiantly. "You can bring your army on me, but I won't beg."
Seonghwa was giving me pleading gestures, to just give in, but I won't. I looked Yunho square in the eye and continued. "Is there a part of you that dislikes seeing me happy when you are miserable? "
Yunho smirked darkly. "I never liked you enough to feel that way, slave."
Something died inside me there and then. There was no use, Yunho had always been empty except for when he had the urge to assert his dominance on me. He grabbed my hair and he began to drag me roughly, but everyone tried to stop him from hurting me further. "Get away from me!" Yunho yelled.
"You're making a grave mistake, Yun, please," Mingi pleaded with him by trying to grab me back, but Yunho just pulled me. He pushed me against the wall and I hit my head. The thump was loud and it caught everyone off guard. But not Yunho. He grabbed my head again and for a moment, it looked like he was going to slam it on the wall hard, but his eyes held so much hurt.
"I should," he whispered. "I really should."
"Yunho, stop it," Wooyoung suddenly interjected. I hadn't even realized he was here. "Send her somewhere, but don't do it, you're not like that."
"Her father---"
"Might have been a beast, but she did not choose her father."
My mouth hung open at Wooyoung's sudden statement. He still has that disdain in his eyes when he sees me, but it wasn't as strong as it was when I first came more than a year ago. They now held a bit of pity in them. Yunho scoffed loudly. "You were in on it," he was sarcastic. "The escape."
Everyone, including me, looked at him in surprise. "Yes and no," he sighed. "Yeosang talked to me, but I said no, but looking at you right now, this seems to be the correct decision."
"Who put you up to this?" Yunho asked, betrayed. "No offense, but none of you are smart enough to plan this." He went up to my ear and harshly whispered. "You're not leaving me. I refuse---"
"You wear a crown, but you're not my king," I said, trying to push him off. "You won't ever hear me scream!"
Yunho's eyes ticked in extreme anger and fury. "I don't want your screams," Yunho growled menacingly. "I want you."
He let me go, not only my body, but he looked like he was letting me go completely. Yunho looked worn out, he looked devastated. We all watched as Yunho tried to get a hold of himself, his eyes crestfallen with every move. We all held our breath when he grabbed his sword and swung it without energy. But he dropped it again.
"Go," he whispered. He looked so devastated and all the fight left his body. "I want you gone before the sun rises."
He stared at Hongjoong. "You take her wherever the fuck you want, but I will punish you and your accomplices myself when you come back, clear?"
Hongjoong nodded. "Clear."
"Go before I change my mind," Yunho spoke to me. "I never want to see you again."
"Come along," Mingi coaxed me out of there. I was in a robotic state by the time everything was over, like my soul was separated from my body and I was looking at myself from another perspective. Mingi guided me out along with an injured Hongjoong while the rest stayed behind. While I was leaving the room, I stopped by the door and looked back, and Yunho was already looking back at me. He was expressionless, but his eyes were red and a single tear fell from his eye. Mingi pulled me back as the door closed.
"To Jongho's," Hongjoong hissed in pain as we walked. "Hurry."
When we got there, Jongho approached us with a worried look in his eyes. "I hear about what happened," he frowned. "I'll handle it. You have to go."
Hongjoong nodded, but I was confused. "Who's going to go with her?" Jongho continued, summoning a carriage.
"I'll do it, Hongjoong can't," Mingi sighed. "Just cover for me."
Jongho nodded and we were about to go into the carriage, but I halted. "Wait, what's going on?" I asked.
Hongjoong gestured to Jongho. "It's his plan." As if nothing could shock me anymore. I turned to look at the Second Prince. "I don't understand," I shook my head. "You dislike me and you have no benefit for this."
"I don't hate you per se," he shrugged. "My mind isn't clouded enough to blame you for the atrocities your father did. I just had to keep that act for a while so Yunho wouldn't suspect anything."
"But why?"
Jongho hesitated. "This has to stop," he whispered. "I didn't want Jiho to die in vain, I just want to live in peace. Don't you?" Jeong Jiho was the Third Prince. I nodded. Of course I did. "Okay then," Jongho urged Mingi and I to go in the carriage. "Go fix Aurora, I don't say this often, but please. You either do it, or you die trying."
"Thank you so much," I cried to him. "I won't let you down."
And then we set off to the horizon. I haven't been out in a year and I couldn't help but tear up while I stared outside as the carriage slowly took us to our destination. "What about you?" I asked Mingi, who was seated in front of me. "How do you feel about all of this?"
"As a knight or as Mingi?" he asked.
"As Mingi."
He sighed and looked outside as well. "I felt very angry for the longest time," he admitted. "It was so unfair, I've struggled to do exactly as I was told yet nothing has changed. At this point, I don't care what happens. I just want order and if you're the key, then so be it."
We set on to a comfortable silence along with our thoughts. I kept asking people because I was still in doubt. Hongjoong had managed to get me out like planned, I just wish Yunho wasn't there to see it.
My heart was breaking into a million pieces and it felt like my insides were dying. His face when I left was breaking me little by little on the inside. Doubt will always be with me, what if I was wrong? Was the pain that came with it, the brutal suffering of my soul, necessary? There was no other way to learn what I have learned. Everything slowly hit me all at once, because earlier I ran on adrenaline, but now that I was confined to my own thoughts, everything hurt. Tears sprang to my eyes and I kept wiping them in respect to Mingi. Of course, he noticed and sighed.
"Just let it out, I don't mind," he coaxed me gently. "It must hurt a lot."
"You knew?" I sniffled.
For the first time in a while, he gave me a friendly smile. "I've known from the start. Only a fool wouldn't notice."
"How?"
"It's not my story to tell," Mingi hesitated. "Can I say something?"
"Of course," I nodded. "You're my friend, Mingi."
He was shocked, but then his body visibly relaxed. Instead of my chaperone, now he looked like a true companion of mine. "You glowed differently when you were with him," he smiled. "That's how I knew."
There was a time where I thought I would be with Yunho for as long as I lived, both as his prisoner and as someone who truly loved him, but now I don't know what life will throw me. I was about to go back home and live out the destiny that I was given for the second time in my life. I can't be with Yunho. I have to set out what I have to do. Even if this didn't happen, I would have left on my own accord. One day, I'll be able to look at myself in the mirror and I get to say that I've done it - that I've set things straight.
This was the life of a princess. Love is something foreign to us, most of us never get to experience it because our duties to our kingdom will always come first. Being a princess was such a bittersweet destiny. Aurora wasn't far and before I knew it, the familiar gates of my kingdom appeared before me and sooner enough, we were passing through it. I didn't know what to feel, this place used to be my home, but now after a year, I don't even know how I will live here again. Much less rule like everyone wants me to do.
"State your name, kingdom, and purpose of your visit to Aurora," a guard stopped our carriage. My heart beat fast, these were the guards that reluctantly let me go with Dune a year ago. They tried hard, Yunho was just too strong. I let the window of the carriage down and peeked my head out and all of the faces of the guards paled.
"Oh my Lord," they said. "Princess!"
They started tearing up and bowing lowly to me over and over again. "Oh, the Heavens have answered us! Our princess is back!"
I smiled, tears filling my eyes. "Rise," I commanded softly. "I am but your forsaken princess." It was emotional for me. They continued crying and some of them went to town to announce my arrival while they opened the gates to let the carriage in.
"Your people love you," Mingi stated in awe as he observed me waving to the townspeople crying in joy and rejoicing at my return.
"And I love them too," I answered. "These people are good people. The only mistake they had was being born under my father's rule. But I will set things straight."
Mingi beamed at me. "It's like you were never imprisoned. It's fascinating."
I decided to go to the back door of the castle because I did not want to be overwhelmed with people about my arrival. Mingi was behind me and admired the architecture. It was very different from Dune. It was such an odd feeling to be back from my own room. I had gotten used to sleeping at Yunho's. I found myself slightly resenting my room, it didn't smell like Yunho, it didn't have his library, it didn't have his scrolls, and it didn't have him. A voice screamed from behind us and Mingi was about to strike but I stopped him.
"Oh, my princess!" my beloved maid, Ilri screamed and ran to me for a hug. She started bawling loudly on my shoulders and I couldn't help but chuckle. When we caught up, I decided to show myself to everybody. If I was going to be queen, this was something I had to get used to. It was uncomfortable at first. I got so used to being a prisoner, and all of a sudden, these people looked up to me like the royalty that I used to be. It was something that deeply saddened me, I will miss the time when everyone talked to me freely back in Dune.
Most of all, I have to get used to not being in Dune anymore. I can't live there anymore and I absolutely can't dwell on the things that will slowly become memories to me.
SEVEN YEARS LATER
It took a while, but I was able to stretch my full potential and discover what I was capable of, both as a woman and as the Queen.
"Hear 'ye, hear 'ye!" the Judge pounded his gavel down the little wooden square.
We were in court and it was the most nervous I've ever been, more nervous than when I was back in imprisonment. Right now, I am waiting for a verdict that can potentially change the outlook of not just my life, but every person alive on this Earth. "The council has spoken," the old Judge cut through the silence. "I, hereby, announce the abolishment of all hard labour during war imprisonment. Prisoners of war shall not be captured again and those who are imprisoning people shall let their prisoners go as soon as possible."
Cheers resounded through the whole court and even the Judge and counsel couldn't help but rejoice. I couldn't fully be happy, it was such a bittersweet moment for me. "My Queen, you did it!" Ilri smiled as we walked out of the court. "Oh, you were amazing back there!"
I held her hand in mine. "Was I?" I grinned. "Please tell me I am not dreaming, my dear friend."
"You aren't, my Queen," Ilri giggled. She put her head up and inhaled the fresh air deeply. "What a wonderful day today, my Queen. Like the Heavens are celebrating us with sunshine."
"You are my sunshine," I smiled. "Would you like to go out with all the other servants today as a celebration?"
Ilri screamed and jumped up and down. "Yes, yes! I would love to!"
I smiled. I was glad that everybody around me was happier than they ever could. The process was grueling, I had to delude myself most of the time that everything was okay and I was doing everything within my rights to be correct, but it seems like I lied to myself too much. I sent everybody in the palace to celebrate in the town, except for a few that would rather stay, and I was all alone in my office. Looking out my window was my happiness, for all my subjects were happy.
But my true happiness stopped seven years ago. I never forgot Yunho. He haunted my dreams at night and when I was awake, he was all I could see everywhere. It wasn't the way to live, but in a way, my desperation to see him again had kept me alive all these years.
I'd become like him over the years, something I regret. I understood why he barely slept, I understood why he was always moody all the time, and I understood why he was the way he was overall. I did it, I wanted to go back and tell everybody who helped me escape back then that they didn't make a mistake in putting their faith in me, because I did it. Sometimes, I wonder what they saw in me - I was just a prisoner - but they saw something in me and to this day, I still want to know.
The celebrations lasted a week and Aurora was flourishing more than ever. It hurt me, but I had to remove every trace of my father - his name, his legacy, even the smallest pamphlets with this name on it. He was still my father and in his sick way, he did love me, but it was the only way to move forward.
"My Queen, can you lend me some of your time right now?" Minghao, my good advisor, knocked on my door after everything went back to normal.
I thought about it, I knew what he was here for, but I gave in. I put away my scrolls and stopped writing for now. "Come in," I sighed.
He came in along with my other advisor, Soonyoung. I groaned internally, but I composed myself. "Honourable Queen," they both bowed.
"To what do I owe not one of my advisors, but two of them?" I deadpanned.
"Ah," Soonyoung chuckled nervously. "You know, the court has been done, maybe we could talk about...you know."
I raised an expectant brow, but on the inside, I was laughing. It was bad, but sometimes it was just nice to mess with them. Minghao cleared his throat. "Should we set the formal celebrations this week, Your Grace? The other kingdoms that worked with the abolishment of the prisoners' capture would like to visit and pay their respects."
I nodded. It was certainly a good idea. After all, the credit wasn't all mine. "Splendid, would the end of the week be sufficient for preparation?"
"We shall try, Your Majesty," Soonyoung nodded his head.
"Alright," I agreed. "Let's do it at the Diamond Hall. It's big enough to accommodate everyone, yes?"
"Yes," Minghao shifted uncomfortably. "And maybe you can pick out potential suitors..."
There it was. I've been hounded about having a King by my side, and I could tell them off, but how was I supposed to tell them that I was not planning to love another man anymore? "Get out."
They both squeaked and ran out of my office as soon as they came in. I sighed heavily and put my face in my hands in despair. It's been seven years, I want to move on, I really do, but I just can't. He probably forgot about me within the year, minus the anger he felt. My legacy as a queen continues, but my life as Y/N has stopped seven years ago. I sobbed softly like I always did when I remembered him. I was aware that I have to choose myself and set myself free but I can't.
And so, another game of being a marionette began. I was functioning and running my kingdom, but I feel like I'm a puppet being controlled with emotions that don't belong to me.
"My Queen? Is everything alright?"
I snapped out of my thoughts and went back to the present. Suddenly, loud music of festivities surrounded me. I looked down and I remembered, today was the celebration for the prisoner's human rights and abolishing the bad. In that grand entranceway where all the royals were entering and going straight to greet me and bow, it's become so easy to fake a smile.
This ballroom was beautiful. It held a lot of memories for me, like my first introduction to the royal society. The pastel hued walls, the most monumental of chandeliers, the grand dancing space, they were all the epitome of luxury and celebration. "Yes, yes, I'm quite okay," I smiled tightly. "Just observing."
My right-hand, Jeonghan, nodded imperceptibly. He knows I'm lying but he didn't dare ask what's wrong. "The great kings and queens and all their royalties will soon enter, My Queen."
Suddenly, I noticed a group of people mingling with the rest of the party. The common people. I smiled and they waved enthusiastically towards me. I wanted everyone to be equal, even for a day, and my kingdom will be one of those who will be known for trying to be accommodating and fair for all its people.
"Announcing, the arrival of the Kingdom of Utopia!"
The horns sounded and everyone stood in attention. King Wonwoo of Utopia was one of my biggest supporters in the battle for this. Everyone entered, paid their respects, over and over again and as much as I appreciated it, it can get very draining. I never realized there were so many kingdoms until I organized one of these.
"Announcing, the arrival of the Kingdom of Dune!"
I immediately dropped the champagne flute that was handed to me, much to the surprise of everyone around me. Gasps filled the area and even the people who sounded the horns paused before they blew on it. Everyone knew the history between me and Dune, my capture, my escape, everything.
"Jeonghan?" I called out in between the music. "Jeonghan!"
A panicked right-hand immediately went to my side. "Explain!"
"M-My Queen," he stammered. "N-Nobody knew either, my theory is that they were the kingdom that didn't want to be named!"
I couldn't even hear the cheers and the music around me, the ringing in my ears got louder and louder, and louder. I do remember that when Minghao was running the list to me. I bit my lip in panic, when I was asking for supporters, some kingdoms who wanted to help didn't want to be named because they wanted to remain neutral on the outside, but help on the sidelines.
A rush of adrenaline passed through my body, I felt my blood pump faster and faster and my heavy breathing couldn't catch up. This was a telltale sign of a panic attack for me, especially because the lights were spinning and my muscles tightened. Familiar faces were suddenly in front of me. I looked around for that face I wasn't ready to see, but I was even more panicked when I didn't see him.
"Breathe in, breathe out, count to ten..."
Before I knew it, my feet had a mind of themselves and I walked down to that voice. A smiling Yeosang readily opened his arms and I just crashed into that hug. "Someone missed me," I could practically hear the smirk on his tone. He pulled me away and took a good look at me. "Hello, Y/N."
Another hand held my shoulders and at first I didn't recognize him. "Don't cry," he gently wiped a stray tear from my eyes. "You're a queen now, you can't let these things get to you..."
I couldn't move, only staring at the man in front of me. San's face had matured greatly, long gone was the boyish charm I loved him for, for it was now replaced by strong muscles, sharp jawline, and sturdy form. He was a man now, but San was still the same. "San," I uttered in disbelief. I pulled him onto a hug and my officials made a move, but I put my hand up to stop them. Behind him, more familiar faces showed. My eyes quickly filled with tears from where I was standing. I couldn't move, scared that this was an illusion and they would disappear if I moved.
"Mingi," I said, my throat suddenly tight. "Seonghwa..."
I don't care what everyone thought, and they probably thought the queen had no composure, but I didn't care. It had been seven years too long. When they rushed towards me and pulled me onto a tight hug, I had forgotten how warm and comforting they were, and how good they felt with me.
"You've grown, I can't believe it," Mingi blurted out before he could stop himself. Seonghwa glared at him playfully. Suddenly, they both bowed. "Respects to the Great Queen of Aurora," Seonghwa announced loudly, and then he lowered his voice only the three of us could hear. "And I'm proud of you."
"Lovely people of Aurora," I announced, loud and proud, earning my old friends' grins. "These are people I treasure in my heart. You will treat them as you would treat me!"
Everybody in the ballroom burst into joyful claps and cheers and I felt a full circle moment. My people absolutely loved them and soon enough they were getting swarmed by all the other royals.
"Looking for someone?"
I froze once again with the familiarity of that voice. The last time I heard that voice, it was for defending me. "Why didn't you enter with the others?" I asked him as he stood beside me with his arms crossed, staring at the party going on in front of us.
"And get swarmed like the others? Ha, look at Yeosang, that fool," Wooyoung snorted jokingly at Yeosang's uncomfortable face as he was getting flocked by multiple people. "No, thank you."
"You never changed," I shook my head. "I'm glad to see you."
"You should be very honoured," Wooyoung grinned. I grinned back, he looked so free and genuinely happy because his eyes smiled with him. "Anyway, he's not here."
My brain short-circuited. "I-I don't know what you're talking about."
Wooyoung laughed. I was surprised at how high pitched it was. "Oh, please. Rest assured, he won't be coming."
It hurt more than I'd like to admit, but it was for the best. Seeing Yunho would break my heart all over again and there were only so many times it could break. "I'm going to get fresh air," I murmured. "Enjoy the party, Wooyoung. I'm really pleased to have you here."
I turned around to leave but he held my arm to stop me. "Wait," he stopped me. "I'm happy for the person you've become, Y/N. Truly. I knew even back then you were strong, so thank you."
That warmed my heart. "For what?"
"For going on. For straightening this nation. On behalf of Dune as the King's right-hand noble," he bowed very deeply in front of me. "I apologize for everything, and thank you very much."
"I forgave you a long time ago, Wooyoung." I felt tears prick my eyes. It wasn't something I just ever expected from Wooyoung, of all people. And so I left.
I decided to go to an isolated balcony to relax and get some air. Seeing them again had made me emotional, but instead of feeling dread, I felt lighter than I've ever been before. Everything has come full circle and it has helped me move on somewhat. I sighed deeply and leaned over the railing. I smiled when I noticed people admiring my garden and the flowers. Gardening was something I brought with me when I got back here to cope with all the loneliness of being alone with my battles - politically and internally.
Suddenly, I heard a scratching sound from behind me. At first, I thought it was just people lost in the hallways - I did let people roam my castles, I was very proud of it - but when it kept sounding, I got nervous. I had a terrible feeling bubbling up my chest. I turned around slowly, my heart in my throat, but sighed heavily when I didn't see anything. I stared at the empty balcony for a couple of seconds before I turned back around again.
It was a mistake. It happened in split seconds, too. I heard the balcony doors close and I felt heat emanate from my back. Before I could turn around, I was grabbed and a hand covered my mouth before I could scream. I thrashed around as I was beginning to get dragged out of the balcony into the nearby room. I held the captor's arm and tried to pry him off of me and he did let go, but he pushed me to the wall instead and pinned me there.
"If you hurt me, my men will find you," I said, trying to level my voice, but I was pretty sure it was shaky. "If you're smart, you'll know what that means. You might be able to get away with it for now, but you will get caught, I guarantee you."
The captor, who I was sure was a man, didn't say anything. He remained unmoving as I stared onto a hard chest. It didn't necessarily help that he was much, much bigger than me. He stayed unmoved and my head was burning with how hard he was staring at me. His nonchalance was much worse than threatening me directly. I yelped when he grabbed both of my hands and pinned it to the wall above me. It was such an intimate position and I didn't know what to do. I closed my eyes, like he would just disappear if I did. I was even more anxious when he leaned down close to my ear, his breath fanning my skin and giving me shivers down my spine.
"Open your eyes."
My world just magically stopped just like it did when I locked myself in a permanent cage and I had no intention of going out anymore. And then, it just magically opened as if time had never stopped and kept moving on. I looked up slowly, almost robotically, tears welling up my eyes. He had a hood on and his face was covered, but I would recognize those eyes anywhere. He let my hands go and they limply fell to my sides and he grabbed my chin gently and lifted it up.
I got a little brave and let my shaking hands touch the mask that covered his face and slowly took it off along with his hood. I fought the urge to touch the familiar scar on his lips, his beautiful lips. His hair was shorter and more swept to the side than I was used to seven years ago, his features have matured and molded itself to fit his handsome face, and his eyes, they couldn't stop looking at me.
"You look the same," Yunho murmured. He put his thumb on my lower lip and pressed on it. "Your lips are still as soft, you smell the same too. It's been seven years, yet you're still the same."
Shivers traveled down my spine and he noticed it. His voice had gotten much deeper and it had that delicious tone to it that hit places in me I forgot existed. "I-I, b-but, y-you c-can't," I stammered like a stuttering idiot. I cleared my throat. "Certainly not. I-I've changed."
Yunho tilted his head. "Your status did," he corrected. "But other than that, you're still you, Y/N."
The way he said my name almost made me want to purr. It was like I was his prisoner again, it was absolutely pathetic. "What are you doing here?"
I whimpered when he snaked his arms around my waist and pulled me towards his chest. I looked up at him, my eyes wide in shock. "Do you have to question everything I say?"
"Of course," I hissed, trying to push him away from me, but to no avail. "I am no longer your prisoner, I am a queen now, and you will respect me!"
A sly smirk shows upon Yunho's face. "You're right, but we both know that's not true."
I rolled my eyes at him. I won't let him demean me again like he used to. It was just unfair, the way that the moonlight was shining on his form reminded me of the man I used to love - or rather, the man I still loved. "What's not true?" I frowned.
"You're mine, Y/N. Whether you believe it or not, whether you like it or not, you've always been mine."
"What are you talking about?" I snarled. Had he always been this annoying, or had my imprisonment and love for this man before clouded my judgment so much? "Was the journey making you delusional?"
He chuckled. "We can change that, you know," Yunho shrugged. "We can make you mine again."
"Are you crazy? How do you propose we do that?"
"Marry me."
Time stopped for the second time today. I stared at him to see if he was going to laugh just to jest me or perhaps, he just wants to torture me one more time, but nothing. His facade was crumbling down but he kept putting them up. I must have had the most flabbergasted expression on my face and Yunho couldn't help but frown.
"I-I think you should leave," I pushed him away from me and walked a distance. "We shouldn't be seen together."
He smirked mockingly. "You're right, Queen of Aurora."
I frowned. The way he said it, it was like he was testing how the words felt in his tongue. He made his way to me and I froze when he stopped directly in front of me and grabbed my hand.
"See you soon," he said threateningly, then kissed my hand. His lips lingered a bit longer than I wanted to on my skin and it sent shivers down my spine. He kissed it again and before he walked away.
"W-What are you doing?" I blurted out when he went to the balcony. "The door's that way...King Yunho."
He put his mask and hood back on. "I know," he said. My eyes widened when he climbed on the railing. "Call me Yunho. That's all you'll call me soon, anyway."
And with that, he jumped off. I screamed and quickly looked down to where he went. I saw him down the path staring at me. He gave me a small wink and then walked off. What the hell was that? I leaned down the railing, my legs just giving out on me. After seven years, I saw the man I loved so much, and I don't know how to feel about it.
The next week, there was a meeting about all the kingdoms that participated in what we decided to call the Prisoner Emancipation Act. I entered with my head held high, my steps regal and refined. I had to thank my father for that. I sat on my throne and received everyone's greeting.
"Is everybody here? Shall we start?" I asked out of courtesy.
"No, Your Grace, the King of Dune hasn't arrived yet," Hansol, my courtier, shook his head.
I raised a brow. I was almost positive that Yunho was doing this on purpose. Jeong Yunho was not known as a man who was ever, ever late to anything. And as if he heard, the door opened and in came Yunho and behind him was somebody who to all I owe every success I have right now. Jongho was surprised at first, but when he internalized everything, he bowed deeply to me and rose back with the biggest smile I have ever seen on his face. I knew what he was saying in those eyes.
Thank you for all the peace we all have right now.
Yunho sat at the very end of the table and stared hard at me. It made me and everybody uncomfortable, half of it because of how intimidating Yunho was, and the rest was because if nobody was here right now, I was pretty damn sure Yunho would eat me alive. "R-Right," I cleared my throat. "Begin."
It started with the matters of what the now-freed prisoners would have to do now that they weren't in captivity. I was lucky because I was a royal, but the normal common people weren't. It was the most uncomfortable meeting I have ever been to. Yunho kept staring at me like a hawk that set its eyes on its food. Sometimes we'd make eye contact, but I avoided him like a plague overall. He wasn't even blinking, for God's sake!
"Your Majesty, perhaps you have an idea?" King Mingyu of Mist asked me hopefully. "I mean this most respectfully, but you have experienced what it's like to be on the other side."
He meant that I was a prisoner once so I should know. I nodded my head at him as I did not take offense. "Schools," I smiled. "They deserve an education so they can reset the lives they once lost and get jobs that pay higher since it's on an educated level."
Murmurs of approval went around the room. "That's a fantastic idea," King Seokmin of Halazia approved. "But wouldn't that be a bit expensive?" That's where I hit a roadblock. It was something I knew would be asked, but truth be told, I haven't thought of any answers yet. It was the reason why I held this meeting in the first place.
"Cut the war budget and tax the rich."
I held my breath and everybody turned at the nonchalant King of Dune. Yunho had his arms crossed, still staring at me. My mouth went dry, was he trying to help me? "Valid," King Wonwoo muttered. "Explain, King of Dune."
"We are at peace at last, thank the Heavens, and nobles surely can give some of their fortune? Call it compensation for imprisoning the people and stealing their lives," Yunho began to explain. My heart beat fast, was he trying to tell me something? I saw the vision of what Yunho was saying and all the scenarios played in my head. For a second, Yunho smiled a little before it disappeared.
"Money will never get back their life," I murmured. "But they deserve the compensation. I approve of this idea."
Yunho might be the way he is and the other Kings have always been wary of him, but even I can't deny that Yunho was one of the most intelligent rulers I've come across. "Ever so wise, Your Highness," Jongho smirked in approval. I held in a giggle. For some reason, Jongho's approval brought me happiness. "I'm one for this idea as well."
"Now that that's settled," Minghao interrupted. "We shall discuss the marriage of our dear Queen."
I closed my eyes, cringing. The other kings began to murmur within themselves, but Yunho's eyes narrowed into the most dangerous slits I've seen. The way he glared at my Minghao made me feel bad for the man.
"Our Honourable Queen," a random noble piped up. "An heir would be suitable for the throne!"
Me and Jongho rolled our eyes. Maybe next time I'd abolish that rule too. "We found a suitable bachelor for you," an older nobleman smiled at me. I knew of him, he meant nothing but the best for the kingdom. "Rise, Aiden!"
Everybody stared at the random noble that stood up from the crowd and approached me, but Yunho. His body language was rigid, and his fists were so pale with how hard he was clenching them together. "I am Aiden Birdwhistle, Your Majesty," he introduced himself. I frowned, he must not be from here. His name and accent were unique and his features were not of anyone near here. "Pleased to meet your acquaintance, my beautiful Queen."
A snort could be heard from somewhere and I didn't dare look if it was Jongho or Yunho. "Ah," I awkwardly replied. I turned to Minghao and glared at him. "Really, Minghao? Out of all places?"
Aiden grabbed my hand and it surprised me. I tried to pull my hand back but he wouldn't budge. "S-Sir, I would appreciate it if you unhand me," I cleared my throat.
"Why?" he smirked. It was different from the smirk Yunho had, this man was slimy. "We're getting married soon."
"I wouldn't go that far," I laughed nervously.
A bang from the end of the table made me jump and everyone looked at a furious looking Yunho. I was very surprised and Yunho's outburst and Jongho looked the most amused he has ever looked ever since I met him years ago. "Everyone," Yunho growled, his voice low and dangerous. "Out."
Nobody moved an inch at first, until Yunho looked around and everyone shuffled awkwardly. Yunho might not be the overall King of everyone, but there was a sort of respect that he held because he was the one who ended my father. "Not you, you motherfucker," Yunho pointed at Aiden who refused to go. "You stay."
"Can I stay?" Jongho asked a little too cheerfully for my liking.
Yunho glared at him before charging towards me and pulling me away. I yelped a little at the force and I landed at Yunho's hard chest. He wrapped a possessive arm over me and glared at the other man. "W-Who do you think you are?!" Aiden screamed, albeit shaky. Looks like he knows who Yunho was.
"You better know your place, Lord Dogwhistle, or I will end you," Yunho hissed.
The man flushed red in embarrassment and anger. "It's Lord Birdwhistle, Your Majesty."
"Do I look like I give a fuck, Lord Birdpisser?" Yunho raised a brow.
By now, Birdwhistle was angry and he took tentative steps away towards the door. "M-My Queen you can't let him do---"
Before he could finish that sentence, Jongho blocked the man and towered over him, not by height since Jongho was much shorter than Yunho, but by weight. Jongho was pure muscle and you do not want to mess with this man. Yunho's voice was clearcut. "I won't ever repeat myself again," he growled. "I better not see you again hanging around here, Lord Turdkisser. I will fuck you up."
By now the poor man was spooked and he ran out of the room as fast as humanly possible. Jongho was laughing hysterically and he laughed so hard, his eyes started to water up in happy tears. "Turdkisser, seriously, Yun?" Jongho cracked up in more laughter. "So mature."
Yunho ignored him and turned to me. "Where's your chambers?"
I pointed at the room across the hall. "T-That one---wait, what are you doing?!"
Yunho was carrying me bridal style, much to my chagrin, and carried me across to my room. Ilri was in there just resting and her eyes widened comically when she saw the scene. I told her everything that happened between me and Yunho and she was more than willing to leave the room to give me and Yunho some privacy.
"I think we need to talk," he began.
"You think?" I hissed in annoyance when he put me down. "What do you think you're doing just dragging me here, in my private quarters, nonetheless!"
Yunho crossed his arms together. "You slept in my bed without fail, Y/N. This is double standards."
My brain went haywire and I began to avoid eye contact. Silence descended between the two of us. After last night, I told myself that I would avoid him, but here we are, at the confines of my private space, alone with nothing better to do. "Nonetheless. I've been trying to get you alone since last week," Yunho's deep voice rumbled through the entire room. His eyes were watching me calculatingly and it was making me uncomfortable. "Why are you avoiding me?"
I stuttered at the straightforward question. "I-I wasn't, I was b-busy with the kingdom's affairs."
"If you're going to lie to me, look me in the eye while you do so," Yunho said. His domineering presence was so suffocating. He wasn't wrong though. This was exactly what I was afraid of, that my heart would open up to him again once we were alone so as much as possible, I tried not to be near him. He tried to come near me, but I panicked. Hurt laced his expression when stepped back from him.
"You can't do this to me," I shook my head, willing the unwelcome tears in my eyes to go away "Seven years, that's a long time, how long are you going to torture me like this?"
Yunho sighed, rubbing his temples with his fingers. It was something he did when he was stressed. That realization made my blood run cold - seven years had passed yet his mannerisms came like second nature to me. "I tried, Y/N, I tried very, very hard in all those seven years," Yunho took a step forward, and I took a step back. "Please, can you just hear me out?"
"I-I don't owe you anything," I shook my head.
"You're right, you don't owe me anything," Yunho said softly. "I'm sorry," he said. "Seven years since that day, Y/N. There hasn't been a day where I never regretted what happened. If I could turn back time..."
My heart felt heavy like a boulder had been placed on top of my chest. "So much has happened," I sighed. "You hated me, you would have rather I died than be anything else besides your prisoner. I-I don't understand where you're coming from right now."
"I was going to set you free when I found that letter in your room," he began to explain, all the pain was written in his face. "You're right. I hated you, I still do."
That stung a lot more than I'd like. "I hate you for leaving," Yunho's voice cracked. "Why would you leave?"
I hesitated if I should tell him the truth. For years, that day has haunted me in my dreams and I was left with all the imagination in the world of what could have been had I just thrown that letter away like I did with the others. "I-I wasn't going to," I whispered, looking down the floor because I don't want to see his expression. "I was going to tell you, but you beat me to it."
Then, Yunho chuckled, and that chuckled turned into a full-blown laugh that sounded akin to a crazed man that lost his mind so long ago. And then, a groan of pain and misery. "For the longest time, I thought I did the right thing," Yunho took a deep breath in and stared at me. "But why did your departure make my chest burn?"
Tears started flowing from my eyes and before I knew it, I was sobbing heavily. So all that loneliness was for nothing? The dreams I had of what could have been were supposed to be what should have been?
"You're beautiful you know?" Yunho whispered. "Have I ever told you how beautiful you are?"
My head started beating a thousand times per minute. I shook my head no. "You are the most beautiful person I have ever laid my eyes on," Yunho confessed, walking another step towards me. "I lost all control and I caught myself staring at you a lot. Control is a very important thing to me, Y/N. It's what makes me function."
"I know," I smiled bitterly. "You loved controlling me."
"I did, you're right, and you know what? Maybe I still do," Yunho sighed heavily, the said control on his form slowly slipping away. There was a slight pause before Yunho continued. "It was awful," he whispered. "I couldn't eat because I'd remember your favourites. I couldn't sleep because you'd be my first thought when I woke up. I couldn't sleep in my own bed because the pillows still smell like you."
All the pain from years ago awakened inside of me. I wasn't going to tell him that my life wasn't any better. "I loved you so much," Yunho closed his eyes and a pained expression crossed his face. "I still do. I didn't realize just how much until you completely left me for good."
My breath got cut short. He loved me. I shook my head adamantly, refusing to believe him. "Y-You don't mean that," my voice broke towards the end.
Yunho tried to touch me again but I refused. "I tried to keep you for as long as I could," he pleaded for me.
I raised a brow. "What the hell does that mean? You mean as your slave and your personal punching bag whenever you were angry? You think that was my life to live, Yunho?"
"No, I didn't mean it---"
"And what about all the times where I would be alone wondering if you were finally going to snap?!"
"But I wasn't---"
"You don't love me, Yunho, you never did---"
"I let you go because my hatred turned into obsession, Y/N. I was fucking obsessed with you!" Yunho roared, making me stop. "Do you know how that makes me feel?"
"Stop talking, I'm b-begging you," I sniffled pathetically.
"Do you know? Do you?!" Yunho shouted, pounding his chest with his hands repeatedly. "I want you so fucking bad, Y/N, I want you so bad that I don't know what I'll do if I don't have you soon because I am going insane."
The better version of me would have walked out from this room and she would have known what to do. But unfortunately, it was difficult to undo the trauma I've gone through. Yunho turned to me and his eyes became soft when he saw the sobs that wracked my body.
"You're the one hurting me right now, Yunho, it's you!" I screamed. It was the first time I said his name again, I wish it was in better circumstances. "It's been seven years and this is what you give me again after so long? I-I can't act in a way that curbs that sick pleasure in your gut!"
"I'm fucked up, okay?" Yunho begged and he tried to hold me but I avoided him. He looked like I just slapped him in the face. "Precious, please let me hold you, just once, please."
Who was this man? The king I knew would have never asked me of this, let alone beg anyone for their consent. "I imprisoned you, hurt you, killed your father, took your life away for a year and I gave you all the hurt you never knew as a princess," Yunho ran his hands on his face.
"But I don't hate you," I said exasperatedly. "Even in the beginning never did because to a certain extent, I understood where you were coming from." I sat on my bed in defeat, plopping down on the soft mattress. "I just never expected to fall in love with you down the line," I whispered. "It was torture, Yunho. It made me so angry and ashamed of myself."
Yunho sat on the bed next to me. "You love me?" he asked.
I turned to him and glared. "Really? I said all of that and that's the only one you heard?"
He shrugged. "Why didn't you ever tell me?"
"Are you kidding?" I snorted. "I was a disgraced princess, why would I tell you? Plus right now, I'm sorry to say, but I'm just more angry than anything else."
Yunho smiled, and I had to pause. My heart refused to be still, it was the first time I ever saw Yunho have such an expression. He looked so young again, so carefree, and so different. He leaned down and gave my lips a small peck. I closed my eyes and blush beet red.
Darn it, darn it, darn it! Why is it that this stupid body can't control itself?!
He held my face with his hands and softly caressed me. "Tell me you still love me, precious," Yunho was slowly leaning in on me. He stared at my lips. "I wish I was the only one who kissed you."
I frowned and I was about to protest but then I remembered a certain man who reminded me of a fox. "It was your order," I deadpanned, unimpressed. "Wooyoung was just following it."
"Yeah, but he didn't have to be that into it," he rolled his eyes. "I swear I wanted to punch him that day."
I couldn't help but giggle at that. For the first time in years, I felt so much lighter, like a heavy baggage has been lifted off of my shoulders. I felt brand new and I can breathe freely. Had I known it felt this good to let go, I would have done it a while ago. "What now?" I asked him.
"I want to kiss you," Yunho admitted. "I want to spend the rest of my life with you, if you'll have me."
He stroked my cheek ever so slightly and I nod ever so slightly. Something stirred inside me when Yunho pulled me up so I straddled his waist. "You're beautiful," Yunho whispered. "So beautiful."
And then we were kissing. Everything felt right at this moment and I couldn't help but tear up a little. Yunho swallowed my grief as his own and matches the passion we both had for each other. I moaned a bit when he began sucking on my bottom lip. I remember the kisses he stole from me from time to time before, but none of them felt like this. None of them expressed Yunho's strong desire for me. It wasn't slow and sweet, but it wasn't fast and rough either - we were both just desperate for each other. It was the reason why both our clothes were gone already.
"Yun..." I mewled softly when I felt his fingers play with my heated core masterfully, hitting all the good spots all at once.
"You can take more, precious, take it all in for me," he groaned.
At first he inserted a finger inside me, then two, and then a third one until I couldn't take him anymore. He smirked at my squirming body. "I didn't know you were this sensitive," he kissed my body all over. "Makes me want to have you even more."
He looked directly in my eye as he watched me take his long, skillful fingers. The wet sounds of my pussy fill the room and it spurs him on to finger fuck me harder. "O-Oh God, Yunho," I moaned his name loudly. "Yunho!"
He groaned lowly as he watched, barely able to talk as he watched his fingers disappear inside me over and over again. He leaned down to claim my lips in a heated, fevered kiss. Suddenly, I was lifted up until I was on top of him and I was basically sitting directly on his face. "Yunho, wait---"
"Hush, precious."
I screamed both in pleasure and in pain when he swatted the fleshy part of my ass. "You're going to take what I give you, yes?" I hesitated, my senses being clouded, and Yunho spanked me harder, his entire palm marking my ass as his. "Answer me, Y/N."
"Yes, yes, yes--oh, Yunho!"
He wrapped his arms on my waist, pulled me down, and his tongue immediately licked thick stripes on my pussy. I nearly saw heaven then and there. It was so obscene, the way he made love to my pussy with his mouth while I was on top was so erotic. “Y-Yunho, please!" I screamed, pure ecstasy running through my veins.
He stopped. "Tell what you want, precious, tell daddy what you want..."
I almost came when I heard that. "Yun, I-I need you..."
I sighed in pleasure when his fingers started stroking my throbbing clit. "Yun, please, please, oh..."
"I need you to be specific, Y/N," he murmured. "Tell. Me. What. You. Want."
"I want you inside me!"
He shook his head. “Not good enough.”
I shook under his touch, desperate for any sort of relief. I didn’t know what he wanted, and my mouth just moved by itself. “P-Please, daddy? I-I want you—“
That was what it took for Yunho to grab me and flip me underneath him. He wasted no time pushing his thick cock inside me, and I was almost driven to insanity when the feel of his hard cock filling me. We both groaned at the euphoric sensation. "I want to lose myself in you," Yunho moaned as his hips moved. His voice was breathy and intense. "Can I fuck you the way I want?"
I nodded without any doubts. Short, but hard, thrusts opened and stretched me as his lips crashed into mine again. Within moments, Yunho lost all control of himself and began fucking me in ways I never thought my body was able to take. "Wrap your arms around my neck," Yunho growled.
"Yes, fucking scream for me," Yunho grunted as he kept thrusting into me harder and harder. It almost broke me into two and I couldn't formulate coherent words or screams. "I said scream," he growled, but I couldn't until he slowed down. He's a menace as he fucked me harder because he knew I couldn't open my mouth. "Scream!"
I did as follows and it was all it took. He was almost violent with his thrusts as he kept grunting over and over again as his cock penetrated me deeper and deeper. "Y/N," he growled deeply in my ear.
I went from moaning to crying when he suddenly pulled and then thrusted back in and buried himself balls deep. Yunho pounded and pounded me until I was nothing but a screaming mess for him, and I loved every second of it. Suddenly, he pulled out. "Turn around," he demanded. "Onto your hands and knees."
Oh God, he was going to take me from behind. I complied and he grabbed my hips and immediately went back inside me. I screamed his name. "You're tighter like this, fuck..."
"Harder, Yunho, p-please," I begged him with a whimper. Yunho smirked and slammed onto me so hard, I wouldn't be surprised if I woke up the next day all bruised. He was hitting me in all the right places and I drooled all over the bed while screaming Yunho's name repeatedly.
"Yunho, Yunho, fuck, Y-Yunho," I grit out. "I-I think I'm gonna c-come.."
That familiar pressure of an oncoming orgasm was about to hit me and it was so overwhelming and almost unbearable. "Fuck!" I shrieked with each thrust of his hips and the way his hands would grab my hips and slam in onto his so I could meet his strokes harder and harder was driving me absolutely insane.
It was violent, but delicious. It was seven years of pent up frustrations and lust. "Whose are you, Y/N?"
"Y-Yunho, p-please," I begged at nothing in particular. He grabbed my neck and put his fingers in my mouth. The sight of me as a drooling mess while he split me open made him grin sadistically.
He bent down and I almost saw stars at how deep he was in me. "You're mine," he kept repeating over and over again. "I'd rather kill you than see you with someone else, you hear me?"
I shivered in absolute pleasure and delight. This just set back feminism by another century, but God, the way Yunho was taking me was altering my brain chemistry. "If I can't have you, then nobody else can. Understand?"
"Yes, daddy, yes," I sobbed uncontrollably. It must have down something to him as his thrust became uncoordinated and his grunts getting louder.
"Oh, shit, precious, fuck," Yunho's voice was guttural, borderline animalistic. "I'm going to fucking come, where do you want it?"
"I-Inside, please, Y-Yunho--"
"Fucking hell," he hissed. "Oh my fucking God, Y/N..."
I heard Yunho's loud groan of my name as I shook and my jerked while the heights of my orgasm took over my body. Ropes of warm liquid hitting the back of my pussy almost triggered another orgasm from me while Yunho continued riding out his high. We laid there for a moment, internalizing what just happened between the two of us, but one thing was for sure - neither of us regretted what happened and we likely never will. One last tremor racked my body and then we were done.
"What now?" I asked softly, all energy drained as I collapsed on top of him when he flipped us again.
Yunho grabbed the blanket and covered our naked bodies with it. "I don't know," he whispered back as he tenderly caressed my back. "To be honest, I don't want to think about it. I just want to focus on us for now."
"I love you," I blurted out, remnants of that high still evident in my tone.
"I love you too," Yunho whispered, placing a tender kiss on my forehead. "You are the best thing that ever happened to me, Y/N. I will never stop wishing that we met in different circumstances, but I'm okay with it now."
"A-Are you sure?" I frowned. "There's not much I can offer you, Yun."
Yunho shook his head. "I loved you when the only thing you offered was your life. I loved you then, and I love you even more now."
"What's going to happen to our kingdoms now?" I couldn't help but ask. It was the reason why I was avoiding him.
"We'll figure it out, precious, don't worry about it," Yunho smiled at me. "You think like a queen now, I'm proud of you." He held my hand tighter. “I meant what I said last week.”
“Which was?”
“Marry me, Y/N,” Yunho whispered. “I don’t think I can live without you anymore. It’ll keep the other ministers off your back too.”
“I-I don’t know,” I told him truthfully. “Don’t you think this all too fast? It’s been seven years, do we even know each other anymore?”
“I don’t know about you,” he turned to look at me with a small smile. “But I will never, ever forget you. See, these people like that fucker, Lord Dogwhistle? Status chaser.” He grabs my head possessively and gives me a swift kiss. “I loved you before all of this, Y/N,” he murmured. “Please, marry me? You don’t have to say yes now, I can give up Dune if you’d like.”
That statement shocked me. “What? Y-You can’t do that Yunho, you love Dune…”
“I know,” he sighed. “But I love you more. Jongho is getting married to a nearby princess, I will figure something out.”
“But Yun,” I frowned. This man was willing to give up a whole kingdom for me, but I can’t let him do that. “Jongho doesn’t seem like the type to want to rule.”
He avoided eye contact. “You’re right, he doesn’t,” Yunho said. He looked so lost. “But I can’t give you up anymore.”
A thought suddenly crossed my mind. “Why didn’t you come sooner?” I frowned. “Seven years is a long time to finally tell me all of this.”
“Because I don’t want to mess you up again, and truth be told, I was pretty messed up myself,“ Yunho sighed deeply. “The best thing I could do back then was support your cause, I gave you every little penny I possibly could.”
I was a bit surprised. He leans in and buries his head on my neck. “You did it, didn’t you? You abolished that law.”
“How much did you donate to help the cause, Yunho?”
“Enough to surpass every little asshole out there trying to outdo me so they could impress you. I worked hard to get rid of the flies buzzing around you asking for marriage, I wasn’t about to let some fuckface have you.”
I pushed him away in slight annoyance. “That was you?” I hissed. “All this time I thought nobody just wanted to marry me!” Yunho laughed at my chagrin and all my anger melted. For the first time in a while, we both felt lighter than ever before. His laughter was the sweetest thing I have ever heard and I would love to hear it over and over again until my days come to an end. “I guess I’ll marry you,” I shrugged, trying hard not to burst into laughter.
Yunho looked like a deer in headlights. “You will?”
I pretended to think about it. “I guess so, you owe me a lot, Jeong Yunho.”
Yunho laughed again - oh, it sounded so sweet - and he stared at me as he wrapped his arms tighter around me. “This feels good,” he murmured. “I feel so much lighter. I can’t even be mad at your father anymore.”
That surprised me. “W-What?”
“If it weren’t for your father, I wouldn’t have even met you at all,” he revealed. “I know it’s not an excuse and I would spend the rest of my life begging for your forgiveness, but for the longest time, I felt so selfish for feeling that way.”
My heart went out to him and all the walls of doubt crumbled on my end. Might I regret giving Yunho a chance? Yes, but the what-ifs will kill me more than protecting myself. I have spent years denying myself of what little happiness I have. “You don’t have to choose between your people and mine anymore,” I assured him. I know he felt bad for loving because his people suffered.
Yunho looked at me, pain and confliction still evident on his face. I held his face in mine and he nuzzled his face onto it, it made my heart explode. “People like us,” I started. “Happiness is very difficult to come by because of the duties attached to our life. I-I just want to be happy, Yunho, don’t you?”
Yunho smiled at me and then gave my forehead the most tender and loving kiss. "You're going to be with me right? You're never going to leave me? You don’t know how much this makes me happy, precious," Yunho grabbed onto my hand. "Together?"
I held his hand tighter as I leaned down onto his hard chest. "Together."
Important note for Author, please read: Hello, everyone <3 The reason why I made this longer is that I'm going on vacation for Lord-knows-how long. I've planned this for a while, but now I need it. TMI, but I have a two-year old kid and lately, writing had felt more like a chore to me rather than something I enjoyed on top of my real life responsibilities. For that, I feel so sad that my passion is kind of dwindling a little. Rest assured I will be back as soon as possible, it's just that the vacation has been planned 8-10 months in advanced.
And to my dear friend, Roxanne. You’ve been there since the beginning. Thank you for being you.
With love,
Aren.
#ateez#ateez smut#yunho smut#ateez yunho#pirateeznet#illusionnet#ateez x reader#ateez fic#ateez au#ateez fanfic#ateez scenarios#ateez imagines#ateez angst#ateez fluff#jeong yunho#atz#ateez stories#atiny#ateez fantasy au
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BEHOLD! MY CRK AU!! "Escaped Too Early"! (very creative title, I know. My geniusness is the size of a peanut.)
AU INFO- When White Lily Cookie was sealing the crack in the Silver Tree, Shadow Milk Cookie was able to sneak out from the crack without anyone noticing. Only escaping with a quarter of his true power, while the rest is still in the Silver Tree.
When White Lily Cookie became Dark Enchantress Cookie, he followed her to the Vanilla Kingdom and watched (and enjoyed) as the Dark Flour War started to unfold. However, despite all the distracting chaos, he wasn't able to get close enough to the Ancients to get back the soul jams before the Ancients disappeared. As he was practically useless in getting those soul jams without his full strength.
Years after the Dark Flour War had ended, he worked as a traveling magician, preforming cool illusional tricks and occasionally hosting puppet shows, just to make some cash to keep himself well fed. That is until he saw Gingerbave and his friends running after a crowned cakehound and decided to travel with them as he was bored out of his mind.
When the news that Dark Enchantress Cookie was making a comeback, fractions of White Lily Cookie started to follow the group, and everyone deciding to go to ruins of the Vanilla Kingdom, Shadow Milk Cookie started to think "Mmm, maybe I trick these dumb kids into getting my soul jam back once the time is right~"
BUT ALAS, he couldn't!! For he had grown attached to the main group, becoming a sort of fun, chaotic, yet protective father figure amongst them (think of him like the cartoon version of Beetlejucie). And he gotten so soft on his "good boy arc" that he was able to hear The Light of Truth a few times during their exploration of the Vanilla Kingdom, which he was kinda freaked out about cuz then he was confused as to why it spoke to him (still the master of deceit, ya know?)
Tho he still holds some bitterness towards the Ancients for taking his and the other beasts' soul jams, at least in the end he got what he truly needed, which is loving and caring friends. Aww.
But will Gingerbrave and the others discover Shadow Milk Cookie's secret? That he's a Beast that had committed multiple cruel crimes and chaotic acts? That he's criminal that should be locked way? Will the Beast escape themselves and go after him for leaving them in the Silver Tree for so long? And will Shadow Milk Cookie ever get his full power returned to him?
Eh, I don't really know yet.
Hope you guys enjoy my little silly CRK AU! Here's a clear png version of my attempt to make this design look like official "gacha pull" art...
The shading was very tricky to figure out. I'll probably get better in the future. ("🌸^w^)>🥛
#my art#escaped too early (crk au)#cookie run kingdom au#shadow milk cookie#cookie run kingdom#cookie run fanart#wizard cookie#strawberry cookie#gingerbrave#cookie run au#i just wanted an excuse to draw Shadow Milk adopting Wizard Cookie and it got out of hand
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If you haven’t seen Wish yet and you love Disney, do not go see it. I am telling you now. It is ripping out the hearts of the Disney movies you love and then waving their corpses around as if celebrating those hearts.
I’ll explain why, again: the message of Wish? Awful. Anti-Disney.
But they've been doing this for a long time. Saying one thing with their movies, and saying another with their PR and Disney Parks Soundtracks.
I'll explain.
Main Idea of Disney's Wish (and the You Are the Magic theme park song and merch): "The power to make your wishes come true is in you."
≠
Most Disney Movies' Idea on How to Have Wishes: "Do what's right, (trust a higher power) and something even more wonderful than what you wished will happen."
Don't try to argue with me about this. You have to look underneath the slogans and the sweater designs and the song titles to what the stories actually support to acknowledge this.
Because you can’t say “do what’s right” has power unless you answer the question “who gets to decide ‘what’s right?’” (Which, coincidentally, is a question Wish brings up and then doesn’t answer.)
Audiences of Disney used to accept that wishing on a star was much like prayer; there’s something you long for, and it’s out of your hands, but you wish for it and you do what you know is right in the meantime. And you’re not crushed, you’re not downhearted, because somewhere in your mind you trust that the combo of those two things—wishing on a higher power and diligence to do what’s good—will be what makes your wish come true.
Trust in a higher power—COMBINED WITH:
—diligence to do what’s good.
The Blue Fairy (higher power) gave Geppetto his wish specifically because he had demonstrated commitment to do good, whether he got what he wanted or not. The Fairy Godmother (higher power) gave Cinderella her wish specifically because she kept on being kind and good to low creatures like mice and wicked stepsisters, whether she got what she wanted or not.
Do you know why that combo (higher power + diligence to do good) is impactful? Timeless? Important?
Because it’s selfless. You want something, but you’re not going to sacrifice doing the right thing to get it. You’re not going to focus so hard on making what you want a reality, on your own, that you miss out on things that could be more important than what you want. And, you’re not so self-focused as to believe that if you don’t do it, it won’t get done.
Jeez, that’s the whole point of The Princess and the Frog!
Tiana wishes to have her own restaurant, and she believes that only her own hard work will grant that wish. She misunderstands her dad’s advice before he dies. She isn’t willing to trust a higher power combined with her own diligence to do good—she only trusts her own ability.
It’s not until she realizes that Ray, the character of faith, was right all along that she learns—what she wished for was too self-focused. It wasn’t complete without love. Something bigger than herself. And getting that was never going to happen just based on her own hard work.
But you know what? It was never going to happen just by a “higher-power” flavored shortcut, either. Because Facilier offers her her wish if she’ll just trust him, no hard work needed. But what does she say?
Trust in a higher power + diligence to do what’s right = selflessness, and getting more than you could have ever wished for. And if your wish is selfish, doing those two things will change your wish into something selfless.
More examples? Get ‘em while they’re hot, in case Wish made you forget, just like the current #NotMyDisney executives have forgotten, what real Disney wishes are for.
Belle wishes to have adventures in the great wide somewhere--but when she's imprisoned and that chance is taken from her it's not reversed because she worked hard to make her wish come true. It's granted because she gave up her wish for her father: she just did the right thing, regardless of her wish. And in the end, she does get what she wished for, which is adventure in an enchanted castle...and much more, because she gets true love, a throne, and a castle full of friends.
How about the One Who Started It All? The one Wish is failing to pay genuine tribute to?
Snow White wishes for someone to love her, and he does--but when they're separated, she does not exercise power to make The Prince come back to her. Instead, she loves who she can where she’s at—the Dwarfs. In the meantime, she has faith that he will keep his promise, and that pure trust in a higher power outside of her control is a big contributing factor to why the Dwarfs come to love her, and learn from her...and in the end, even more than she could've wished happens. He does take her to his castle, but she also has seven new friends who also love her, and the Queen is dead. And she didn’t need to use “the power in her” to work harder and get it done. She just needed to not focus so much on herself at all.
How about a male main character? One who’s wish starts out selfish, but after learning to wish on a higher power and be diligent to do the right thing, gets more than he could wish for?
Aladdin wishes to be somebody different (somebody he believes Jasmine could love, somebody who lives in a palace and is respected and “never has any troubles at all.”)—but doing everything in his own power for that wish proves that it was selfish all along; so he switches to doing the right thing, regardless of if his wish comes true, and he gets even more than he could’ve wished. He gets real love with Jasmine, he gets his friend Genie, and he gets to be free from feeling “trapped” because he doesn’t have to hide who he is anymore.
Or Simba?

Simba wishes to get to do whatever he wants as King—but when Mufasa dies and he’s convinced it’s his fault, it isn’t for that wish that he goes back to Pride Rock to confront his past and his Uncle. It’s because he had an encounter with a higher power—his father—that helped him to realize his wish was selfish all along. He gives up the selfish wish, and he goes back to take his place as king, not so he can do whatever he wants, but so that he can take self-sacrificial responsibility that comes with ruling. And because he just does the right thing, finally, he gets more than what he wished for.
How about something more recent? Zootopia.
Judy wishes to make the world a better place by proving she can be what she wants to be and catching bad guys—but when she tries to make her wish happen on her own, in her own abilities, she fails and is forced to realize that she should’ve been looking for help by understanding “bad guys,” like Nick. It’s only after she humbled herself, admits she’s wrong, and changes her wish from “proving I can be what I want and catching bad guys” to “proving that understanding each other makes the world a better place” (much less self-focused) that her wish comes true—and so much more. She does make the world a better place, and she does get to catch bad guys, but she also gets to befriend one who was a good guy all along, and become all-around more effective at her dream job.
This is how Disney always has been. Because it’s at the heart of good storytelling, and even life (not to get too dramatic.)
The power is not in you. Because it’s not about you. Self-sacrifice, faith, and doing the next right thing regardless of if you get your heart’s fondest desire is what makes more than just your wishes come true. And there has to be belief in a higher power to make that message powerful.
But Wish?
Not only is it bad at showing instead of telling. Not only is it lazy and soulless.
But it’s characters rip the Star out of the sky and say “don’t wish on this. Wish on yourself, to get what you wish for. You don’t need a higher power. You don’t even need to sacrifice to do what’s good—whatever you do is good, because you are the one doing it.”
That is wrong. That is not true, and it is not powerful. There’s no sacrifice in focusing on or placing your trust totally in yourself, and it undoes every good thing Disney has done up until now.
And it undoes it on the 100th anniversary, and it flaunts Easter eggs of the very things it’s undoing.
#pinocchio#disney#wish#Disney’s wish#wish Disney#Wish#Disney#meta#character analysis#storytelling#the princess and the frog#Disney fan#princess tiana#tiana#Naveen#Dr. Facilier#disney villains#asha#king Magnifico#Valentino#queen Amaya#ariana debose#chris pine#Cinderella#classic movies#film analysis#animated movies#animation#wish 2023#Aladdin
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your phone buzzes in your hands as you scroll mindlessly. you glance at the message preview for a second—just a message from a group chat, one of many—and go back to scrolling.
and that's when it happens.
out of nowhere, like some kind of smug white-haired hawk, gojo satoru swoops in and snatches your phone from your hands with a victorious, "aha!"
"satoru!" you shout, scrambling after him immediately.
but he's already halfway across the living room, standing triumphantly on the other side of the coffee table like he's just stolen the declaration of independence.
his grin is positively feral. "let's see what secrets you're hiding from me, hmm?"
you stare at him, completely unamused. "what are you, twelve?"
"emotionally? maybe," he chirps, flipping the phone around dramatically in his hands. "now then, what spicy stuff do we have in here? hidden chats? secret admirers? is your wallpaper still me wearing sunglasses over my blindfold?"
you cross your arms. "give. it. back."
he holds the phone up like it's an olympic torch. "nope. not until i confirm you're not part of some underground spy ring."
"i literally let you eat off my plate. why would i hide anything from you?"
"suspiciously defensive," he says, squinting at the screen and pretending to scroll even though he hasn't unlocked it yet. "what's your passcode again? your birthday? my birthday? the number of times i've been right in an argument?"
you glare. "try zero."
"ouch," he grins. "cold. but fair."
you plop onto the couch, arms still crossed. "are you done?"
"nope," he says cheerfully. "i'm fully committed to this investigation. as your incredibly handsome and slightly unhinged boyfriend, it is my duty to discover the truth."
"the truth is i'm dating a pest in gucci sunglasses."
he gasps, hand clutching his chest. "you take that back!"
"only if you give me my phone."
he considers this with an exaggerated hum, pacing back and forth like he's on the verge of solving a great mystery. "you know if you were hiding something, this is exactly how you'd act."
you throw a pillow at him. he dodges effortlessly. "i'm annoyed, not guilty!"
he finally stops pacing and stares at the screen. "wait. your passcode is literally my birthday?"
you groan and throw your hands in the air. "congratulations, detective gojo, you cracked the case."
he beams. "aww, you like me."
"i tolerate you."
he unlocked the phone with a smug flourish, only for his expression to immediately drop. "wait—there's nothing in here."
"wow," you deadpan. "shocking."
he stares at the screen, then looks at you. "your most recent text is you asking your friend if it's okay to put ten cloves of garlic in pasta."
"there is no such thing as too much garlic."
"i'm actually really disappointed in you. where's the scandal? where's the mystery man? the forbidden double life?"
you sigh and hold your hand out. "give me the phone, satoru."
he walks over slowly, dejected. "you're boring," he says, placing the phone back in your palm. "adorably, tragically boring."
"and you," you say, locking your phone again, "are never touching my phone again."
"oh, come on," he pouts, collapsing onto the couch beside you. "just one juicy secret? just one? i'll settle for a weird shopping history. you don't even have a secret pinterest board of wedding dresses."
you narrow your eyes at him. "that's because you already do."
"hey," he says defensively, "a man can dream!"
you shove him with your shoulder and he immediately drapes himself over you like a weighted blanket with chaotic energy.
"next time," you mutter, "i'm locking it with your middle name. good luck remembering which fake one you gave me."
satoru's laugh is muffled against your shoulder. and despite everything, you can't help but smile.
because satoru, with all his pranks and dramatics, still ends up exactly where he always does—right next to you, grinning like an idiot, with no secrets between you.
just you, him, and the comforting knowledge that the most scandalous thing in your phone is a saved photo of him sleeping with a mouthful of marshmallows.

#wen writes.#jjk#jujutsu kaisen#jjk drabbles#gojo drabbles#jjk fluff#jujutsu kaisen fluff#jjk x reader#jujutsu kaisen x reader#gojo satoru x reader#gojo x reader#satoru x reader#gojo satoru x you#gojo x you#satoru x you#gojo satoru fluff#gojo fluff#satoru fluff#gojo satoru#gojo#satoru#jjk crack#jujutsu kaisen crack#gojo satoru crack#gojo crack
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some general tenna x reader headcanons?
HEY! Thank you so much for the request, I already have some others in my inbox as well so I'll try to get to at least a second one today since it's my day off! I thought it would be cool to start with these since there's not many around yet. Enjoy! ^^
Tenna x GN!Reader - General Headcanons!
(...they are below the cut. :3 )
♡ Let’s start off by saying that Tenna absolutely has a soft spot for you, as his trusted, wondrous partner: he can come off as obnoxious and demanding to his subordinates, and while these characteristics also pop up in the course of your relationship sometimes, he always makes it a point to be nicer to you and communicate as best as he’s capable of.
♡ You don’t even need to remind him who he’s speaking to much if he ever gets like that, because the love towards you that fills his heart does enough of a good job to remind him itself. You’re one of the few individuals he sincerely apologizes to whenever he’s made a mistake, and if for some reason he doesn’t end up apologizing straight-forwardly, he surely acts like hurting you even on accident might just be the worst act he has ever committed...until you remind him that going back to normalcy is what you guys should be doing instead.
♡ He likes praise...a little too much, perhaps. Your compliments never fail to make him grow a whole foot taller at least! If you keep your praise for rarer occasions, you might...no, you WILL catch a blush on his cheeks as well (in the form of SMPTE color bars on his whole screen)! In return he will compliment you just as much if not even more and you should probably prepare yourself to engage in his silly little antics...because depending on the context he might pick you up and spin you around as he chants all his adoration towards you!
♡ He’s also surprisingly clumsy when it comes to things like cuddling and hugging, unless they’re part of an act and he can get unserious with it: it might be because of his size, or even because of the lack of physical affection in his everyday life except when it comes to you...or both. Either way, he never really knows how to position himself, and usually his hugs in private are quick and a bit awkward at least at first. However, he would very much like to get cuddlier with you, so questions such as ‘Are you liking this, sweetheart?’ are ever-present whenever either of you initiates any kind of affection. Over time he becomes more natural with it but he still asks almost every time...just to make sure!
♡ Tenna is...quite passionate when it comes to his show! And as such he likes involving you whenever it’s possible; if you’re camera shy, don’t you worry, for you don’t even have to be part of it directly! Of course it would be awesome if you could be on stage together, but for him it’s enough that you’re enthusiastic about trying out his games and quizzes before the show airs. It’s never really an issue if you can’t get the answers right or you can’t beat a level, as long as you give gentle feedback on how to improve it. And if you ever do end up on stage, prepare yourself to be the spotlight! He’s VERY excited to have you there, and will make it his life mission for the night to get it across that you’re his beloved partner!
♡ Dates with Tenna are extravagant, so you should also be prepared each time he decides to take you on one! There’s no such thing as ‘boring’ when he’s involved, for better or for worse. Yes, sometimes he deems it a bit too important to be entertaining, when you’d just like to have a little moment for yourselves. It’s very difficult for him to unlearn to be an entertainment all the time, and to instead learn to just...be. Sometimes it has you wondering if he was programmed for it, but TV shows can be chill and so can he, by logic. So yes, it’s very much possible for him to tone it down and just enjoy his alone time with you, especially when you’re the organizer of the date. He learns to enjoy to unwind, and so you slowly become his safe, comfortable place.
♡ Overall though, Tenna makes it a point to be as charming as he can whenever a special occasion comes around: your birthday, Valentine’s Day, your anniversary, your monthiversary, your...dayversary...yes, he’s absolutely one of THOSE people. If you worry about dates, then stop right now, because he will remind you anything and everything related to you and your relationship and even more if you ask him to. On the rare occasion that he forgets, something is probably up and you should worry, but he seems to be incapable of forgetting, be it because he’s constantly thinking about schedules or something else. Though it could be overwhelming if you’re not the type to celebrate such things all the time...it’s clearly a good indicator that he absolutely cares!
#tenna x reader#deltarune#deltarune x reader#deltarune ant tenna#ant tenna#mr tenna#mr ant tenna#x reader fanfiction#general headcanons#headcanons#tenna headcanons#mr. ant tenna x reader
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