#i'm doing better but My Fucking God

[cosalphonse]

this is the first time i've gone more than like a day or two without posting since i made this blog in 2019 and it's only because i went through the literal worst case scenario and lost the most important person in my life very suddenly at one of the worst possible times it could've happened. it took apocalyptic levels of trauma and grief for me to finally stop fmaposting

[sheerakk]

[asaethiel]

horror movie twins/gansey's magicians/etc

[aeturnum-mendacacium]

everybody has fics or headcannons that Bruce's speach was influenced by how he's such a dad, or batman, or a serving cunt but like what about how his speech Is influenced by how he talks normally as "Brucie wayne" to people?

I imagine he's got that posh accent when he's speaking when he's acting as Brucie Wayne and says 'darling' at the end of his sentences and it became a habit when he's not in the cowl

This is also partly because justice league's ears almost fall off when batman is scolding them( wearing a domino, cowl was damaged on mission,no voice modulation) because why does batman have a Italian-posh accent and who just called Superman darling.

[tubbytarchia]

Sorry I'm still feeling dread about maid Jimmy. Poorly made comic thing under cut

Sorry this is gonna take up space but I really wanted it to be viewed as intended and such... I put it under read-more though so no one can complain!!

My art block is as strong as ever and killing me but I'm feeling so emotional and dreadful about that last SOS episode still, I forced my way through it lol. Joel wasn't there when it went down (I'm so fucking glad), which made me think of this instead and uh yeah I'm. Fuck man I dont even care about SOS that much!!!! This has ruined me

The way Pix (didn't really do anything wrong btw) made Jimmy dig a hole because he owed him for saving his life, and then Sausage comes in "aha!!!" and obligates Jimmy to do something for him too, quickly disregarding any uncertainty on Jimmy's half and shifting it onto Jimmy with "You actually reminded me that you owe me" (paraphrasing) grrrrr. And tbf he did talk about dancing at that point, but later Jimmy was clearly made to believe that he'd only be serving drinks and then Sausage goes "you're serving YOURSELF!" GRRRRRRR sorry this is just minecraft I know I know. I'm reading to deep into it yaada yaada. But no fuck that I want Jimmy to be happy and not to be made feel like he owes people things even if they saved him, I don't want Jimmy to talk like he's about to cry, I don't want him to be talked down to, I don't want him to feel like he has no room to object and has to just listen to others or expect to be treated a certain way hardwired into his brain, I don't want his abrasiveness to be more of a sought reaction to bullying/teasing/etc rather than a sign of the confidence he used to have, he's been through enough!!!! I hate this why can't I just awooga at maid Jimmy. That'd make things so much easier. Alas the horrors

[lloydfrontera]

i don't buy that lloyd would get over his fear of the restoration of fate that quickly. he was doomed by the narrative for years and now he's supposed to shake it off in less than two weeks? absolutely not, he literally tried to kill himself in order to avoid it, ain't no fucking way he just stopped being scared about it in a couple days i don't believe it

anyway. this is my way of saying that lloyd refused to cross dimensions until he made javier swear that he would kill him with his own hands if there was even a hint of the restoration of fate starting up again. he wouldn't consider going back if it meant putting his family and home in danger again even if it meant being left behind in a place he would've rather died than stay at.

and they both know that javier would fall on his own sword before hurting lloyd but they also know lloyd would take his own life before allowing him to do that or to let his existence put his loved ones in danger again. they know lloyd doesn't really need javier to kill himself, not if he's really committed to it. he's done it before it after all.

him asking javier this is. a warning. of what he's planning to do if the restoration of fate starts again. it's his way of telling javier that he cannot promise things will be okay if he comes back. that he must be ready to lose lloyd again if necessary because lloyd won't allow anything else.

it's also maybe... an indulgence on lloyd's part. he's felt himself die so many times now. and so many of his deaths were painful or terrifying or surrounded by his enemies and sometimes all three at once.

but he remembers a sunset, a coat over his shoulders, shaky yet reliable hands holding a sword. a quick, peaceful death on his own terms, done by someone lloyd trusted with something far more important than his life.

and he knows it's selfish, he knows it's cruel, but if he has to die, for real this time, can't it be at the hands of his best friend? if he has to be killed, can't it be done by someone lloyd knows cares for him? if he has to close his eyes and never open them again, can't the last thing he ever sees be the face of the person he loves enough to die for as many times as necessary?

and javier agrees because. what else can he do. he spent so long hoping lloyd would finally trust him enough to tell him what he was planning so javier could help him in anyway he was able to and now. now lloyd is asking this of him.

he desperately doesn't want to say 'yes'. but he cannot say 'no'.

what else can he do.

what's the point of being the most powerful human on the world if he can't even protect the one person he swore to protect above all things. what's the point of him if the only thing he can do is promise to kill his best friend because he has no other way to protect everything they've worked for.

how can he promise lloyd that everything will be okay, that things will work out, that if needed javier will die for him before letting anything happen to him, when he already failed before.

what else can he do

anyway. i don't think any amount of end spoilers and confessions to the jewel of truth are enough to soothe the terrified, paranoid and utterly traumatized part inside lloyd's chest that goes tight any time anything goes even remotely wrong for a good while. it takes a couple months, maybe a few years even, before lloyd stops going cold every time there's even a hint of trouble around him. before he stops reflexively looking to javier's sword to calm himself down whenever things don't go perfectly right in every way.

it takes a while. but it does happen. and things aren't perfect, that's not how life works, but they're good and even when they aren't, lloyd can finally face them and believe they're not his fault. that his existence is not an obstacle for the happiness of the people he loves.

[pendragonshoard]

So what im hearing is, on the Argo II, 8 seasons from now, Percy is gonna spontaneously start clapping and singing the consensus song?

[novelconcepts]

Do you ever just lay awake at night, turning over in your head the stark difference in delivery between Hewson's Van saying--steadily, unshakably--"it's just something that's happening to you...happening to us" and Cypress' Taissa saying--imploringly, whiningly--"this was not just my dream, this was our dream"?

Do you ever just turn it over and over, how often Tai tried to scare Van away, and how it only made Van set her feet more firmly? How Taissa's first love was this person who saw a problem fall into Taissa's lap, a problem that was quite literally trapped inside Taissa's body, and decided unflinchingly: No, that's an us problem now? How she refused point-blank to walk away even with blood in her mouth, how she flatly informed Tai "I'm never gonna be scared of you", and promptly turned a moment of pain into a declaration of love? And how this would etch itself into Taissa for the rest of her life? How she'd take these things that worked with Van--with the person Van was, with the bond they shared--and try so hard to run through an identical script with Simone?

Except Simone is her own person. A completely different kind of person. A person who hasn't been offered any of the context, any of the realities going on inside Taissa. So: naturally she doesn't respond the way Van did at eighteen--and will go on to do all over again in her forties. Naturally, she hears our dream as the excuse it is, not as a plea for connection. Naturally, she is scared away when Taissa pushes, and shouts, and begs. Because there isn't blood in her mouth, not yet, but there will be. And they have a son to worry about. And she isn't eighteen and a special kind of immortal, a special kind of romanticized. She's a grown woman with responsibilities, with priorities, with an understanding that you can't fix someone just because you love them. And Tai can't just perform a revival of the play she and Van had memorized twenty-five years later with a whole new performer in the works, and expect it to shake out the same.

Of course it doesn't work. But look at Taissa trying it. Look at Taissa trying to reframe her first love through a new lens. Trying to recast it. Trying to play it through again. Van taught her love was sticking out the blood, shaking off the pain, making a you problem into an us problem. Does it ever just eat at you, how tragic it is, watching Taissa try to shape her marriage around a woman who isn't even wearing a ring?

[nemesis-is-my-middle-name]

and happy pride to these assholes. it's still june so i can technially still make that joke right

[necrotic-nephilim]

for the ask game (1)

au where bruce is attracted to his robins and batgirls. he tries not to think about it or act on it, but it's getting more difficult with every new member of his team he acquires. does anyone know? do the robins and batgirls notice his weird behavior? what do they do about it? do they ever find out the truth? who would think it's terrible and who would find it strangely hot/comforting/nice? does bruce ever act on his feelings?

for the ask game!

oh my GOD do i have thoughts for AUs like this, i love this shit so dearly, dirtybadwrong Bruce who's trying to keep a lid on it my beloved.

i think the fun of this AU is if characters would notice Bruce lusting for themselves vs would they notice Bruce lusting for a different Robin/Batgirl. like does Dick pick up on it when it's just him and Bruce? no, because it's just. him and Bruce. he and Bruce are weird and complicated and hold endless bounds of nuance. that's just How Bruce Is, and Dick is the "test run", in a sense. he knows Bruce is new to this whole sidekick/family thing and is giving Bruce grace for being rough around the edges. but when Bruce starts looking at Jason or Tim or Cass that way, that's when Dick starts to notice. it's never enough of a suspicion he feels justified to bring it up, but the thought lingers. he's hyperaware and grows less and less comfortable with leaving them alone with Bruce. it's a weird game of chicken, Dick and Bruce staring each other down when Bruce's touch lingers too long. each waiting for the other to say something first. if Bruce ever broke and actually acted on his feelings, Dick would be eaten alive by the guilt of knowing something was up, but never saying something until it was too late.

obviously, Cass would know. there's no world where Cass *doesn't* know, the nature of who and what she is would immediately clock it. but the issue is, Cass doesn't have a good framework of what family looks like. she doesn't really understand familial vs romantic love bc she has no firsthand experience of what a parent's love should even look like. so she never calls it out. she just watches. i'm a fan of Cass believing this is normal and believing she too can express and act on attraction that's vaguely incestuous. maybe it's with Babs, maybe it's with Dick or Tim or Bruce himself. but she recognizes this as Normal and Accepted within the Batfamily, so it severely fucks up her understanding of familial love and i just. man it's my favorite thing about Cass in Batcest honestly, is how you can play with her lack of experience with love, boundaries, and sexuality.

Tim is the fun one for me. because my favorite flavor of BruTim is when Tim knows, as he agrees to be Robin, that there's a non-zero chance that Bruce is going to be Weird and agrees anyway because he's decided it's an acceptable risk. so Tim knows from the get-go because he's expecting it. if Bruce acts on his attraction, i think it's either with Tim or Cass first, because they're the most likely to confront him about it in a way that isn't entirely negative. Tim has accepted it's a possibility and Cass just seeks being loved and touched so. it leads to the first time someone's ever confronted Bruce about it. and the thing is, Bruce really doesn't like confrontation about his flaws. the first time Tim tries to imply he's okay with it, Bruce would lash out at the idea, tell Tim how inappropriate that is and benches Tim for a week. it'd probably take a united front from Cass and Tim to get Bruce to even *admit* to the attraction. still Bruce wouldn't allow it to happen and he brushes them off until finally, the dam breaks. it's fun if there's a cause like sex pollen, but i think it's *more* fun if it's just. a random fucking Tuesday and finally Bruce is at his limit. he has no real reason, there's nothing particularly different about that day's routine. he just sees Tim or Cass striping armor and sighs and gives in.

i don't think Steph, Jason, or Babs would notice until anything substantial happened. not because they're not wicked smart, but just because none of them were looking for it. Jason put Bruce on a pedestal when he was alive, and when he came back from the dead he wasn't close enough to be noticing Bruce's interpersonal dynamics outside of his narrow scope. Steph has no real framework for what healthy fatherhood looks like, so if Bruce's touches linger, if he stares too long, she just shrugs and assumes it's how it is. and Babs was just never quite close enough to Bruce to notice. if and when she notices, is when actual sexual things start to happen between Cass and Bruce. because Cass would see no reason to hide it. Babs would be pissed, but it'd be tricky to navigate. Cass would be an adult, even if she's only 18/19, so technically, she's old enough to be consenting. if nothing else, Bruce is a careful man. even when he breaks and gives in to his desires, he covers his tracks well. he makes sure he has enthusiastic consent and there's no legal recourse that could be taken. age of consent and all that. there's not much Babs can *do* other than try to tell Cass (and/or Tim) that this isn't normal or okay. not that it gets her anywhere, but god would she try.

by the time Duke comes along (if we venture out of the pre-Flashpoint era) i think it's a sort of. open secret, in the Batfamily. talked about in nothing but hushed whispers and knowing glances. at some point, they've all had sex with Bruce, caving all for different reasons. some more than others. Tim sees it as a duty, Cass sees it as a way of seeking comfort, Steph sees it as getting Bruce's approval for once, etc. it's never forced on them, but eventually, they all come to Bruce sooner or later. and that's the fun irony of it, i think. they try to convince the others not to, but would go to Bruce on their own well. because complicated reasons they can't put into words. sometimes, Bruce is just a messy man who doesn't realize how prized his Attention to for the rest of the Batfamily. that weird duality of not liking him, but also wanting desperately for him to like you. all of them have dealt with it, at some point. so for Duke, it takes a while for him to understand this... whole dynamic. it's Cass who tries to explain it to him, and he's a little horrified, a lot confused. especially when Bruce starts staring at him a little too long as well. i think he'd only want to watch first but well. they all cave eventually.

also fun bonus if we venture into the Dark Knight Returns universe for my bestest girl Carrie Kelley: there's such a like, "i'm fucking around and i'm finding out" vibe to Carrie. like Tim, she's very proactive in just. deciding she's going to be Robin and she's ready for whatever that entails. (IMO canon Carrie is closer to fanon Tim than canon Tim is but *that* deserves its own post-) like she takes one look at the old man that is Batman and goes yup. he's never fucking getting rid of me now. if Bruce started having weird feelings about her, i think she'd have *fun* with it. she's decided she's in it for the long haul and for whatever being Robin means so. she's almost teasing about it, seeing how hard she can push before Bruce snaps. since it's an older, gruffer Bruce, i think he'd express open annoyance at it first, almost a sort of banter about how Carrie behave. but of course he caves and Carrie leans into it, because there's a fun in having all of Bruce's attention to herself. in the main timeline, Bruce is pretty split with so many Robins and Batgirls, but during their era, it's *just* her and him and she's very proud she's got him all to herself.

[danthropologie]

Christian Horner about Daniel Ricciardo's return to F1 | ESPN F1 Unlapped, August 3, 2023

[triglycercule]

murder time trio should get to all experiment with dead bodies. why? because they can and it would be cool (okay but seriously i'll provide an explanation). all these freaks are scientists. i think it would be cool and funky if they all got to experiment! except morbidly and bloodily because none of them are right in the head now

killer like has his whole thing with wanting SOULs for some unspecified reason??? i'm just gonna steal the common interpretation that it's so he can find a way to fix his own soul through coding. but like,,,, what does he do with the desd bodies??? all the fellas he stole those souls from??? well this is where dust and horror come in

it's One Panel and i'm ABSOLUTELY reaching here but there's a (single) panel in horrortale where horror's pulling apart some sort of human limb like an arm with a device. why? what for? i dont fucking know at all man like papyrus said why is he always doing something weird in his room. anyways i'm just gonna guess its probably for rationing in horrortale (but it could also be that horror just felt like ripping apart an arm. for scientific purposes. or because he did this after ripping off aliza's arm so maybe he's doing some sort of recollection reflection or something i dunno im not a professional on this man). killer could totally send all the already dead HUMAN bodies horror's way for horrortale's food situation. maybe horror likes to dissect the humans yk maybe he's not just the type of bash (a head open) and dash. monsters dust so you cant see their guts but humans dont so horror gets prime time first hand experience on the human body! and then after he's done poking around in the brain he can give the meat and organs to papyrus for him to do his specific spaghetti confectionery

but but but what about the monsters that killer takes the souls from! surely he doesn't just take from only humans (dude idk if he actually does take from only human or monster. probably not right? he needs to study BOTH types of code so he can be most informed) so he must also take monster souls. and fortunately for dust (i do NOT think he'd quite like handling gore) monsters don't leave behind bodies or blood or allat they leave behind dust. hah. dust experiment with dust. i think its already a headcanon out there that dust likes to study dust. i cant exactly recall WHY exactly but maybe it's for sentimental reasons or just something to do to pass time between resets. so killer can just pass on whatever dust he gets to him and he can put it under his little microscope and be a little nerd what a GEEK. give this guy glasses and remove all his teeth but one i guarantee you he'll look like 🤓

and once again i hear you cry out but but triglycercule! why would killer even give the dead bodies and stuff to horror and dust in the first place??? erm number one because i said so silly. jk. and number two (if we're going in a nightmare's gang context here) it could be as a way for killer to gain horror and dust's trust. a way for them not to tattle on him for stealing souls for some unknown reason. maybe there's somehow important coding information left behind in the bodies/dust (because that's literally what utmv is made of) and killer wants dust and horror to do that work for him for some reason. maybe just a way for him to get rid of evidence maybe if theyre buddy pals and close enough just as a gift. i dunno man there's a bunch of reasons as to why he could possibly do this. i just really liked the thought of the trio all wearing fancy lab coats and goggles and i was like damn how can i make this a real possibility

[xo-jocii-xo]

petition for season 12 Reid and Hotch to tag team and take out their sexual frustration + anger out on me after pissing them off all day being a tease? (ff prompt???)

[leatherbookmark]

our flag means death S2E3: the innkeeper

[thetantiger]

Wanna share with the class about your thoughts on Stolas and Blitz :D?

Oh my god yes I absolutely do thank you for asking.

So I'm going to start off by saying that this post is in favor of Stolas. I firmly believe that both of them are in the wrong, but Blitz is more in the wrong than Stolas and I am about to explain to you in detail why.

So let's start off by listing Stolas's wrongdoings because I feel like it'd be a flawed argument to just completely fucking gloss over them. Stolas has:

a. Repeatedly stepped over the line of Blitz's sexual boundaries even after Blitz asked him to stop. This happens in Murder Family over the phone while Blitz is being chased by Martha. I think it's worth pointing out that the show does not take this seriously until it's convenient for Blitz's character (Helluva has a bad pattern of male r*pe jokes [see: Moxxie]) but since it's an actual part of the plot now I'm acknowledging it as important and serious.

b. Talked down to Blitz patronizingly and embarrassed him and used his status, either intentionally or not, to get his way. This happens in Loo Loo Land (the entire episode), The Harvest Moon Festival (on stage) and, again, in Murder Family over the phone, talking about the deal of exchanging the grimoire for sex.

Now let's discuss the things that Stolas has done to help remedy these things. Do these things fix what he did? No. But it sure does help:

a. Communicated clearly with Blitz that he is no longer required to have sex with him to maintain his business (Full Moon)

b. Given Blitz a reliable way to maintain his business using the Asmodean crystal without any expectation of repayment (Full Moon)

c. Repeatedly acknowledged that he unintentionally used his place of privilege to put Blitz in this situation (Full Moon ["This.. transactional thing we have, it's- it's not right anymore, it hasn't been-.. It never was."] and specifically "When I See Him Tonight" ["And if he's only here as a prisoner, what kind of monster does that make me?"] and Apology Tour "All 2 U" ["What if it's all on me, for missing every sign and every glance and every turn?"])

d. Repeatedly reassured Blitz that he in fact does not look down on him as a person (Full Moon "I think so highly of you, Blitz.." and Apology Tour "I don't look down on you, Blitz, when have I ever-?!")

Now before I get into the arguments between them in Full Moon and Apology Tour I want to go ahead now and explore how Blitz enabled this relationship.

Blitz repeatedly re-expressed sexual interest in Stolas. This does not make Stolas sexually harassing him okay in any regard, this is not related to that--we'll get there. But he does:

a. respond to Stolas's assumption that Blitz was there for sex in The Circus by.. having sex with him in order to obtain property (THAT ISN'T HIS AND THAT HE DOESN'T ACTUALLY HAVE A RIGHT TO PRIOR TO THIS AGREEMENT)

b. make sexual comments and advances towards Stolas throughout the show (strings him along by bringing him to Ozzie's only to stalk M&M, offers to have sex with him as reward for saving him and the rest of IMP in Truth Seekers, etc)

Now, let's talk about their arguments.

Stolas clearly and concisely communicates his purpose, his intent, and his feelings for Blitz. Blitz first assumes this is a sex roleplay thing (which, for that being his initial reaction I'm actually not going to fault him) and then, when Stolas peacefully tries to disengage and leave the situation (because it's clear that Blitz at this point is not interested) Blitz pursues him through the house against his will, screams at him, verbally berates him and accuses him of not giving him a "FUCKING minute to think" (despite, again, pursuing him through the house and also not previously asking for it). He calls him names and offers to PHYSICALLY FIGHT HIM.

I don't understand how it can get clearer than this.

THEN, in the next episode, he:

a. appears at Stolas's house without permission and after being physically dismissed by him

b. remains at his property after Stolas tells him he "doesn't want to talk right now"

c. SEXUALLY HARASSES HIM by INSISTING he just "wants to be shown a good time" or "needs to realize how good an angry fuck would be right now" after being REPEATEDLY TOLD TO LEAVE and that Stolas DOES NOT WANT TO HAVE SEX RIGHT NOW ("As SHOCKING as it may seem, Blitz, I'm not in the mood to 'do sex' with you right now--in fact, I'm not even in the mood to 'do words' with you right now!" "Seeing you right now is hard!" "Get out! Right now!" "I'm uncomfortable with how you're speaking to me now!" "Stop it!")(so, on the sexual harassment front after this scene in Apology Tour, Stolas and Blitz are even).

d. SCREAMS AT HIM WHEN STOLAS DENIES HIM SEX (and also uses "gay" as a derogatory term in the process we love it here) TO THE POINT STOLAS HAS TO RETREAT INTO HIS HOUSE INSTEAD OF BLITZ, I DON'T KNOW, LEAVING THE PROPERTY LIKE HE ASKED HIM TO

At this point in the series, you cannot be serious to say that Stolas is more in the wrong than Blitz is. I see so much "bOtH sIdEs" bullshit or that Stolas is the complete villain here but right now for me it's 75% Blitz and 25% Stolas. I am a fucking Stolas apologist at this point with the braindead takes I've seen on here. Stolas says "I don't want you here, go home please!" at the party and then Blitz STILL DOES NOT ACKNOWLEDGE WHAT STOLAS ACTUALLY WANTS OR NEEDS IN THAT MOMENT AND REFUSES HIS REQUEST

"Stolas is just being painted as more sympathetic by the narrative because he's Vivziepop's favorite character" Okay are you drawing this conclusion from what's actually in the source material or are we just making shit up now.

"Blitz is just reacting this way because of his trauma/past/insert the name of any mental illness here" Okay neat. That's a reason. But not an excuse. It does NOT make his behavior "more right." This exact same argument can be made for Stolas and his sheltered upbringing as well as his previous abusive relationship and it just feel so fucking irrelevant to the conversation. We're talking about fault here. Not reasoning.

"But- but- but- but how else is Blitz supposed to react?! His dad was a piece of shit and everyone has always been horrible to him his entire li--" I am going to fucking hit you with my car.

[dootznbootz]

Odypen definitely and equivalently adore each other BUT I weirdly can't see them as the type to actually say "I Love you".

They still definitely vocalize their love for each other but it's more so in "My Joy", and "Extraordinary Woman", "Strange Woman/Man", etc. And very cheesy lines (both say some cheesy shit in the Odyssey, and he definitely does in the Iliad as well. "Joy like a drowning sailor seeing land" bit???)

I could see "I adore you" but even then, that's probably during very specific moments but the actual "I love you"??? I just typed it just now for fic shit and... It weirdly just didn't feel right and I don't know why. 😅

Idk maybe it's kind of because I see them as over the top in ways, they love wordplay and riddles and I think they'd almost think "...That's not good enough >:( " about it??? I don't know???😂